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Whenever I talk about the medical neglect and ableism I've encountered as a victim of the healthcare system, there's always some cockwaffle who feels entitled to come into my inbox and make the argument of "not all doctors" while talking about how "people like them" (because it's always someone in a field of medicine who does this) are doing their best and it's really hard because so many people fake being ill to get on welfare (Yikes), but like, yeah, obviously #not all doctors, because if all doctors were negligent, bullying scum bags, I'd be dead.
But here's the thing: while I truly believe that the majority of doctors are doing their best in a system stacked against them and their patients, their presence does not negate the mass harm caused by the bad ones. And there are far more bad ones than you realize.
Fuck, John Oliver literally did a segment on this last week:
Yes, the truly bad, malicious doctors are in the minority. Most are just horrifically burned out and fighting a losing battle against a system, killing both them and their patients through a lack of funding and resources and profound overwork.
But the malicious ones do exist, and they will go out of their way to harm patients who don't kowtow to them.
I almost lost my life because when I was in my early twenties, I told a doctor I didn't think she was listening to me, and I disagreed with her assessment of my mental health (she was not a mental health doctor, and I was there for heart palpitations and chronic pain). She retaliated by putting "non-compliant" in my file.
There was also a fun little "doesn't show respect" note too that lives rent-free in my head because I know I wasn't rude. I was polite. I just didn't agree with her, and my refusal to accept her off-handed comment that "you probably have bipolar or BPD" (again, I was there for heart palpitations and chronic pain) meant I was "refusing care."
I wasn't. I just refused to be slapped with a mood/personality disorder when I was there because I kept fucking fainting when I stood up.
(Spoiler alert: it was dysautonomia)
That "non-compliant" marker followed me around for years. It followed me across an ocean and effectively ensured that any doctor I saw was going to treat me like absolute dogshit because no one wants to help Difficult Patients. It wasn't until I was so undeniably ill, literally on the brink of death, that anyone helped me.
I'm alive because of a good doctor. And all the good ones that came after him because of him.
So, I know they exist. You don't have to tell me that.
But I really fucking need you to acknowledge the bad ones and that you're part of a system with a long, long history of abusing minorities and vulnerable people. I need you to acknowledge that because it's the only way we're going to survive this godforsaken nightmare and make things better.
So yeah, #notalldoctors, but if you feel the need to say that because someone talking about being literally left to die by the medical system hurts your feelings, I'm going to have to ask you to take a step back and ask yourself if you're going into medicine for the right reasons.
Namely: do you want to help people, even the "difficult" ones?
Even the ones who might disagree with you?
Even if they're on welfare?
Even if they'll never get "better" in a way that means "cured"?
Just a thought. But hey, what do I know. I'm just someone who experienced hemolytic anemia because doctors kept telling me I was anxious and needed to exercise more 🤷♀️.
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DPXDC Prompt #61 part 1
Danny didn’t like thinking about his old life. He was born to a family of assassins and as soon as he was out he never looked back. He had to fake his death and he changed his name, as far as anyone knew Damian Al Ghul had died on a mission to America. He was determined to keep this secret to the grave. Of course he knew who his dad was, Bruce Wayne was a prominent figure and he knew if we went there his secret would get out and he never wanted to be forced to be an assassin again. Once was enough.
Danny knew he had a soft heart, his adoptive parents, the Fentons and Jazz had told him so. Jazz knew he didn’t have the greatest childhood or past but she never pried, she understood his business was his and wouldn’t let her own curiosity get the better of her. The only issue their family had was their parents obsession with ghosts. Damian never believed in ghosts, the entire thing sounded like a hoax. He probably never would have believed in them but then life happened.
Danny believed, but it was kind of hard not too after everything that happened. When he had turned 14, his parents finished their biggest project yet. A portal to the ghost zone, of course it doesn’t work at first and his parents were very disappointed. Danny felt conflicted about the whole thing. On one hand he wanted his parents to succeed and he wanted them to be happy, on the other the portal was the reason he ate alone with his sister at night. He wanted a normal family life, something he was never allowed back at the league.
He did something so stupid that night.
After his parents along with his sister were asleep, he crept down to the basement and stood in front of the empty hole in the wall. He looked around the outside of it first but nothing seemed to be out of place. Then he stepped into it and before he got too far into it something happened. He knew there were a lot of cords on the floor and thought he had avoided them all, but as he realized he was quickly being acquainted with the floor, he out of instinct held his hand out to catch himself on the wall. Right onto the ON button.
He didn’t remember much but pain after that.
A lot happened in the year after the portal was turned on but Danny thought he was taking things well. His sister found out about everything sooner than he liked but having someone to help him was something he didn’t realize he really needed until then. The ghost attacks were frequent and Danny was having trouble finding the time for school, friends, and fighting ghosts that the assistance helped a lot.
Danny sat at as desk in Mr. Lancers class, who was going on about the play Hamlet. Danny was only half paying attention, he was preoccupied thinking about the latest conversation he had with Clockwork. Danny was recently crowned prince after his victory over Pariah Dark. He didn’t want the crown, ancients knew what Grandfather would do if he ever found out, but he had no other option but to accept. The conversation left him rather drained and it felt like every word his teacher spoke bled together.
He eventually made his way to lunch and before he could make it to his destination a blue mist wafted out of his mouth. Sighing he ran out of the room to find a place to transform. Once he was Phantom he wasted no time finding the ghost. Of course it was Boxie.
Before he had time to even fight though a portal opened up right besides Danny and he was kicked in by the Box Ghost. The world seemed to swirl around him until he landed harshly onto some pavement. The pavement was a roof and he appeared to be in a city.
Not just any city he soon realized as he looked over to a bank that had the words ‘Gotham Bank’ brightly plastered on the front.
Shit… Danny wanted to avoid something like this, unfortunately the portal was already gone.
After taking a moment to think about his predicament he decided the best course of action was to call Jazz.
He took a look around the rooftop he was on and when he didn’t see anyone he transformed back.
Pulling out his cell from his pocket he pulled up his sister's contact on it and hit the call button.
His sister took a bit longer than usual to answer but the hesitation in her voice caused him to pause, “H-hello?”
“Jazz, it’s Danny, we’ve got a code green,” he knew setting up code colors with his sister would come in handy. Red meant he was gravely injured, yellow meant the ghost got away and he was in pursuit, blue meant he caught the ghost, and green meant he fell through a portal or something similar.
There was silence on the other line for a moment and Danny was almost going to say something else but she spoke, “How do you know my name?”
Master Post:
Next:
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There, in the mouth of a cave, stands a cat.
He stands many lengths below its ceiling, his long tabby fur bristled against a chilly southernly wind, staring into the darkness ahead of him. He has only been in this cave once before; a cat gone seasons before led the way down, down, down to its center, following the ancient limestone walls with twitching whiskers and anticipatory breaths. At its lowest sits a cavern bathed in the blue light of glowing toadstools, full of dripping stone teeth and stale mineral air. It’s where he earned his name from Fate; it’s where he was gifted Her blessing. He remembers looking on in awe and wonder back then.
He stares with less reverence than before. His brow is set and his eyes are steely in the growing dusk hour. No hesitance trips his steps as he walks into the maw of the cliffside.
The darkness quickly eats him whole as he walks, relying on vague memory and intuition to guide him to where he seeks. He walks with purpose, old paws landing one by one on older stone, pushed along by determination and, to a lesser extent, grief. The last time he came here he was promised safety and security, plentiful food and peaceful moons, a life made better by banding together instead of not. She had promised him these things, had filled him with the pain and the warmth of one thousand fires, had given him the lives needed to defend his new family with every fibre of his being. He needs to know why She lied to him.
It left as quickly as it had arrived; sickness weaved its way through the Colony, affecting more cats than not with its rattling lungs and sour stench. Oaktrail and Emma had little time to prepare, and very few herbs to help. It was a battle lost before the fight had begun.
Iciclestalk, Frozentuft, Hailkit. These names hug his mind like a barbed vine, drawing blood as their spines dig into his flesh.
Iciclestalk was older, tall, perhaps too thin even for his age. His brows hung in a perpetual scowl, but there was a softness in his blue eyes. Perhaps he was the only one who saw it; perhaps he was the only one Iciclestalk would let see. The sickness stole the air from his lungs in less than a sun cycle.
Frozentuft, the adopted daughter of Hollyspeckle. She had been healing from a broken bone, having taken a terrible fall two moons prior from the cliffside. She was young, but she was weak. The sickness in the medicine den infected her lungs, and she lost her battle in her father’s paws.
Hailkit was… She was a kit. One of the Colony’s first, the only daughter to Rainpool and Heatherdash. She was spritely and kind, inquisitive and talkative, and had so much more life to live. Her mother became ill, and in turn she did too. She was too young to stand a chance.
Iciclestalk. Frozentuft. Hailkit. Their names slice through his bones like gnashing wolf fangs, alighting the fire burning in his soul. He picks up his pace, scraping against walls, baring his teeth and unsheathing his claws. There is a rage broiling beneath the grief, battering against his ribcage and climbing up his throat, stinging his nose and eyes.
He rounds the corner and arrives to a room of spikes and blue light, and he bellows out the flames scorching in his belly.
“Blasphemy!” he cries out, his raspy timbre echoing out in all directions. He stands, fur bristled not by the wind but by anger and pain, broad and challenging at the mouth of the cavern. He glares eagle talons to the air around him. “Your tongue ought to be fed to crows for the lies behind your teeth!”
He expects no answer, but the rhythmic drip, drip, drip that follows only fuels his fury. “Cowardice is unbecoming,” he continues, venom coating his abrasive taunting. “Reveal yourself to me, o Dictator of Fate, I demand an audience!”
He stalks to the center of the room, surrounded on all sides by stone daggers taller than they are wide, splashing through tiny pools without care or trepidation. He harbors little respect for the One he calls out to.
“I offered my service to You,” he says. “I’ve lived by Your guidance, by Your blessings, by Your will. You promised me— You promised us your protection. You promised our moons would be without strife! You promised!”
He stomps a paw into the puddle he occupies, spraying droplets in every direction. His lips curl as he seethes.
“Tell me, where are Your blessings?! You took my healer from me! You took his mate! You took two warriors in their prime, my mate, a child! You stole a child from her mother! In what way is that a blessing, My Lady?!”
His caterwaul reverberates back to him in antagonizing waves, as though they mock his plight. His claws scrape terribly against silt and stone below.
“ANSWER ME!”
One moment, he is bathed in the pale blue glow of underground fungus. He blinks, and he finds himself in a pine forest. The pine forest, shrouded in cool spring morning mists. His home. His shock cuts through his brimstone ire in an instant.
He opens his jaw to speak, but a translucent white tail just catches the edge of his vision. It flickers, disturbing the fog around it, before disappearing behind a wide tree trunk. He narrows his eyes. “Your ways are no clearer than a muddied pool,” he hisses, trailing after the elusive feline.
He walks until the tree line breaks, and the familiar sight of cliffs and a cascading waterfall greets him. The wisp of starlight zips along with him in tow, across the large stepping stones that disturbs the river’s flow, up the well-worn path that weaves its way up the sharp incline, around the corner…
He pauses. Not for the tail of Fate, which has now hidden itself from view entirely.
Ahead of him, cats of all shapes and sizes envelop his vision; kits come bounding from the Nursery, their mothers following closely behind. Cats with soft, round faces and kitten fluff clinging to their cheeks brush noses with their mentors, ready to start the day right with patrol or training. There are a few he recognizes; his deputy Amberfuzz speaks to a pair of dark grey tabbies and sends them to collect a grey and white cat for what looks like a hunting party, and they brush past him as though he is nothing but a stone on the path. Mottledwhisker presses his muzzle to the head of a grey tabby lying across the sunning boulder, mumbling something intelligible before leaving their side. Oaktrail lounges nearby, and it’s here he realizes something odd; Oaktrail looks to be moons older than the tom cat he knows now. His thin brown muzzle is tinged with silver, and his sallow cheeks are a startling sight.
“Is…” he mumbles, his brows creasing in confusion. “Is this my Colony? My family?”
No voice responds, but a warm breeze blows his fur the wrong direction. It sends tingles up his spine.
“Alright… Why show me this? What do you want to tell me?”
The wind blows harder, buffeting his back with staccato gusts.
“Use your words, My Lady,” he says, glaring to his left. “I know you are capable enough.”
Another gust brushes past his ears, his eyes, his nose— A scent on the wind, warm amber and cool evergreen, painfully familiar. It seizes his lungs. His head whips to the right, and he sees… He sees…
“Hello, old man.”
The voice belongs to a tall frame, an older frame, one perhaps too thin for its age. He’s not thin any longer; he looks strong, well-fed, like a weathered face on a youthful body. His brows are not furrowed, and his soft blue eyes crease at the corners.
“You,” he breathes, unable to keep the quiver from his tone. “You… Mouse-brain.”
Iciclestalk chuckles, the fond expression growing even brighter. “I told you I’d go first, didn’t I?”
The shaking in his voice bleeds into his limbs, and he falls forwards to bury his face in his mate’s neck fur. He inhales the sharp scent like anything else would be inadequate.
“You left me too soon,” he whines, lifting his paws up to circle around Iciclestalk’s shoulders. “Why did She let you leave me? Why did She take you away?”
A tail wraps itself around his own, as Iciclestalk’s response rumbles through his head. “It was my time, love. I was getting old and slow anyway.”
The anger threatens to bubble back up, but his mate’s presence keeps it at bay for the time being. “She took a child, Icy. She took Hailkit… Rainpool didn’t deserve that.”
The tail tightens slightly. “I know, I know… It’s an unfortunate thing. But she is safe with us. Frozentuft, Mousetuft… Cliffclaw and Shinefreckle, too. We’re all safe here.” His tongue rasps gently across his ear, and then his nose nuzzles the top of his head. “Please don’t fret, alright? We’re okay. And the Colony will be okay, too.”
He glances away from Iciclestalk’s neck, towards the bustling camp before them. There looks to be many more cats than he realized, more than who he can recall at home. The confirmation of a surviving generation brings a sort of calm to his troubled heart. The Colony will be okay.
For a long time they rest like that, entwined and pressed together in every place they can, living within the other’s scent in silence. Long is still not long enough when Iciclestalk begins to pull away.
“Don’t go,” he mumbles into the taller cat’s fur, tears prickling behind his eye lids. He feels he’s cried too much the past few days.
Iciclestalk gives him a sad smile, one that breaks his wounded heart all over again. “Not a goodbye,” he replies, tipping his head to bump their foreheads together one more time. “It’s not a goodbye. It’s a ‘see you in a little while’. I’ll be here waiting.”
His eyes open, and just as swiftly as the vision began, he finds himself back in that damp, dreary cave. His paws are soaked nearly to his ankles, sending a shiver up and through his spine in an unpleasant way. He huffs to himself, and glares back and the dagger-encrusted ceiling above.
“If what you’ve shown me is true,” he says, his tone now lacking the ire and accusation from before, “then I expect you to keep your word to me. You will ensure the prosperity of my Colony— my family. I will not let your will be its downfall. Do what you must; I will do the same.”
There, at the mouth of a cave, stands a cat. A warm wind blows in from the north, and in spite of loss, Glowstar cracks a smile; spring has arrived.
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