#LIKE. why is there no school counselor?? do you know how much time & resources & effort & TRAUMA we could have saved the students &

[squishosaur]

hey man. i'm just saying. why would we put inexperienced teenagers with over-inflated egos and obvious emotional issues into combat classes and make them claw their way to the top of their dorms and expect things to just run smoothly. who actually thought this

[vincent-gavazi]

Does Anybody Really Like the College Essay?

I don’t think anyone would say the college application process is exactly “fun”. It’s often the kind of thing I’ve spent the entire first quarter/half of my senior year stressing about, which wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t for the fact that I’ve had to stress about SATs and college-level classes before that. Then I  have to fill out all of the schooling and extracurricular information, and eventually, I still have to actually apply to the colleges and hope I get in, which can sometimes be a shot in the dark. Most kids aim to get accepted into the Ivy Leagues, which is why they’ll put so much time and effort into the whole process. But let's face it, practically everyone applying to Harvard or Yale has a 4.0 GPA and a 1600 SAT, so there’s going to have to be a lot of cuts. That’s where the college essay comes in, and why it can be a heartbreaker if you don't use it to your advantage.

 Paul Rudnick wrote a funny piece on the college essay, titled College Application Essay. Here, Rudnick knows the secret. He knows what the admissions counselors want to hear. He explains how as a child, he flew to Berlin to “help the victims of the recent tsunami”(Rudnick 1). And when he returned to the States, he designed “chairs without legs for people who’d rather sit on the floor” at a prestigious academy(Rudnick 2). 

Rudnick didn’t do either of those things. In fact, it’s difficult to know exactly what parts of his three-page essay are true, because he uses so much satire to poke fun at the admissions process, because he knows that’s what colleges want to hear. They want personal stories about the time you led your soccer team to win the championship against all odds, and how you developed a shelter for orphans. They want these huge acts of specialty and talent so that they can separate you from the rest. That’s where the college essay can be so punishing; it damages students who don’t have these amazing stories. That’s where it leads to these valuable tips and tricks that’ll boost your chances of getting into a school. I call it “the art of lying”.

 

Colleges explain this away as saying it’s all to promote “diversity”, but no one really knows what that means. Kirkland and Hansen explain this phenomenon in their study “How do I Bring Diversity?” Race and Class in the College Admissions Essay, where they cited a college applicant who had no idea how she could bring diversity to a school, being a regular girl with regular hobbies. This goes back to Rudnick’s problem, and why lying has become so common in college essays. Kids are unsure of what to actually write about, and they don't know how they can honestly differentiate themselves from the rest. 

And the colleges keep it vague about what they want, so kids have to resort to lying to even give themselves a chance. Kirkland and Hansen themselves explain how students often have “uncertainty about the meaning of diversity” and need to grasp onto whatever they can(Kirkland & Hansen 104).

But why is it all so confusing for students? It’s because, as James Warren says, “essay prompts are misleading”(Warren 43). Colleges will make it sound like they care about you as a person, but we already know that isn’t true. That’s what makes the art of lying so valuable. Whether you lie, exaggerate, or genuinely do have something to write about that colleges will want to hear, you have to know how to write them down, but you can’t know that if you haven't learned about it. 

What I mean is that, as Warren explains, this phenomenon has hurt low-income students, as well as minorities, who don’t have the resources to be taught how to essentially “pass” the college essay. They haven’t had teachers or counselors, and certainly not tutors teach them about the college process at all. If students of average backgrounds don’t even know what to write about, how is a student that’s  never learned about the college essay going to write a good one? It leaves students oblivious. It leaves them in the dark.

At best, the college essay is a brag sheet for students to write about all of their “achievements” so that colleges will look their way. These kids don’t respect it, value it, or put any ounce of true soul into it. At worst, the college essay is a way to weed out a college’s idea of the “have-nots” and crush a student’s chances of making it into their dream school. These kids hate it, dread it, and want to forget about it. So if you ask me, I don’t like the college essay, and I doubt most people do.

[donnellycraig37]

Homeschooling Frustrating You? Learn How To Regain Control

Sing a song, draw a picture, read a book or view a video, there are a ton of ways that a homeschooling parent can teach their kids today. What you read here should help you explore all sorts of ideas which will make your classroom the best on the block. Homeschooling doesn't mean you have to be their only teacher. Involve other experts, be it the Baker at the local bakery or your nearby librarian. Family members and friends can step in and help, too. The more teachers you provide, the broader the knowledge base your children will end up with. When you need great ideas, take your kids to the local library or craft store as they often have free classes, clubs or other events. Aulas de violão para iniciantes can get a feel for what your kids like to do, and what they dislike, and keep a logbook so you know what to touch on for lessons down the road. When you home school your child, you take on more than the role of teacher. Actually, you'll also have to be the cafeteria worker, physical education coach and possibly even a counselor. Consider the responsibilities each title carries as you plan out your daily schedule and routine. Prepare lunches in advance, schedule outdoor time and make yourself available for emotional support and motivation. Even homeschooling teachers and students want to feel included. For that reason, you should both consider joining a homeschooling support group. Your student(s) will get to talk to other kids who understand the lifestyle and challenges of homeschooling. Likewise, you can get input, advice and general support from other parents that have already struggled with and succeeded at homeschooling. Get in touch with other homeschoolers in your area. Homeschooling can be a lonely path if you do not make an effort to seek out support. Many areas now have homeschooling co-ops, where parents in a community work together to share resources and offer help. These are provide a valuable social outlet for your child, who does not have the same opportunities to make friends as a child in a public school. When drafting your goals for your homeschooling classroom, be reasonable. Don't expect your kids to finish high school by the time they're 12, or to spend every waking minute in the classroom. You need to give them the ability to learn at their own pace while absorbing as much as possible. The goals you set should be both short- and long-term so that you find achievement comes at frequent intervals, meaning rewards can be given as well as congratulations. Write down a list of all the reasons why you have chosen homeschooling for your kids. Start off with a list of the pros and cons of public schools in your area. Next, write down how you're going to overcome those cons and include the pros in your own classroom. Subsequently, create milestones and goals you want your kids to reach as you teach them. Create a timeline for those goals so you can be sure they're attained. Give your child a place to learn that is quiet and free of distractions. Keep it separate from the normal play zone. Set up a desk or a storage area to store all of the materials so they are easily accessible. Before you decide to home school your child make sure that you understand exactly what you are getting into. Check into your states requirements, and what materials you will need. Make sure that you can set aside enough time to juggle your everyday responsibilities with giving your child the best education you can. One of the things that holds parents back from homeschooling is the myth that doing so will end up costing more than private school tuition. While some of the learning materials out there are, in fact, expensive, there are just as many affordable, effective resources available. The Internet is a valuable clearinghouse for workbooks, lesson plans and discounted texts to suit nearly any need and curriculum. In this case, at least, money shouldn't be the deciding factor. Whether you want to teach your kids math, science, history or English, the advice you've read should help you do so in a fun manner which lets your kids embrace their education. This in turn assures you of knowledge retention, the key to a great education. Good luck with your lessons!

[confusedlamp]

Mental Health Strategies

I have dealt with various mental health BS (anxiety, depression, ADHD), and while I haven't gotten it all figured out, I have been dealing with it for well over a decade now. I figured I would make a list of coping mechanisms that have helped me and are worth trying out if you haven't already. None of these things are “magic” (just try this and your brain will be all fixed!),  and obviously not applicable in all situations. I mostly learned these via therapy or from other people struggling with mental illness. This also may or may not be to help me have a list of things written down for when I forget. 

Putting this below a keep reading thing because this got long FAST: 

For depression funks:

-Find a small task you can complete. Wash a dish, throw clothes in the hamper, take out the trash, etc. Something small.

-Take a shower. And try changing clothes. Even if it's in to some pajamas. If you aren't up to showering, try washing your face and maybe wiping down with a wipe. But a change of clothes will still feel better.

-Eat something. Doesn't have to be "healthy." Some food, no matter what it is, is better than no food.

-Can you get outside? Doesn't have to be to excercise. Just sitting on the front steps for a few minutes in the sun.

-Doing something to take care of yourself. Can you brush your teeth? Have a glass of water? Brush your hair? Just pick one thing and so it.

-Plan something. See if you can get a friend to meet you to hang out (or zoom) or maybe for dinner. For yourself, maybe find a movie to go see (post pandemic). Preferably find something that has a set time.

For panics:

- Square breathing. Breathe in for 5, hold for 5, breath out for 5, hold for 5. Repeat.

-There are a ton of meditations on youtube. Search "5 minute meditation" and you'll find a ton of videos.

-After the initial panic is over try calling a friend. If you can't for some reason (sometimes it's 3 am or your friend isn't available), try finding some cat videos on youtube. I highly recommend Cole and Marmalade. Something light that will get your brain on something else.

For Executive Dysfunction:

-Remove steps to putting things away. For awhile in school, I would have a mess of papers that weren't organized or put away because I was trying to use a binder. As silly as it sounds, having to neatly align paper holes or got find a place to punch those holes, would prevent me from putting things away. So I switched to folders. Suddenly I stopped losing things and my papers were organized.

-Bullet journaling. Or rather, I just have a little notebook where I put all my to do lists, grocery lists, project planning, brainstorming, etc. I don't properly Bullet Journal (TM) but I keep all my lists in one spot and it helps.

-To do lists in general. Writing out steps to get something done. Cross things out when you finish them. You get a better sense of accomplishment.

-When executive dysfunction is preventing you from getting out of bed, break it down. Step one, sit up. Step 2, swing legs over side. Step 3 stand up.

-Same with any task. If it seems too overwhelming or you just can't bring yourself to do it, it might be because you are looking at all the steps and feeling it's too much. So just think about the first one.

-Alarms and reminders. I put everything on a calendar in my phone. Google Calendar allows you to set a reminder for events days, weeks, hours, and minutes ahead. You can also set alarms for things like "I know I need to leave at 3 for the appointment, so I am going to set an alarm for 2:45 to start getting ready." Do not rely on yourself to look at the clock. YOU WILL NOT LOOK AT THE CLOCK IN TIME.

-Set the dang alarm clock across the room. That way, you gotta get out of bed to turn it off. Once out of bed, go take any meds, or if you don’t have meds, go do a small morning task. Usually doing this small task is enough to get me awake enough to not get back into bed. If I do, well, at least I have taken my meds. 

Sensory Issues:

- Fitted sweat pants and hiking pants. I can’t stand tight clothing, but I want to look presentable. Sweatpants that taper can still look decent. Travel pants or hiking pants (you can find these at places like REI), basically look like slacks but are made out of stretchy material. They also usually are made out of quick dry material which is nice. 

-Fidget and sensory toys. I really like hedgehog rings which have these little spikes on them I can run my thumb over. Also the tangle. I have a tangle that has a rubber coating that has little bumps on it. What you end up liking might differ, but those are two of my favorite. Also, if anyone gives you shit about these, you can explain “it’s sorta like a stress ball, but instead you [whatever you do with this fidget toy].” 

-Ear plugs. I wear these a lot because I have particular issues with sounds, especially certain ones. I prefer either silicone gummy ones or I like these that are “slim” because they don’t make my ears hurt. You can also get musician ear plugs that are made for musicians to protect their hearing, but still be able to hear tones and what is going on, for when sound is simply too load (also good for concerts). 

For General ADHD things: 

-Work somewhere different. This is a bit limited due to the pandemic currently, but just working at the kitchen table instead of your bedroom can help. In college, I used to go to the library to work. Just the idea that I was going to someplace specific to do a specific task, helped me actually get started. 

-Promise yourself that you will work for 10 minutes. Set an alarm if needed. Usually just starting will make the task seem less intimidating. If 10 minutes is too much, do 5. 

-Cardio. Get your self moving. This is good for a lot of things, but I highly recommend it for before you have to sit down to work on a task, like school work. I personally run, but if that’s not your thing dance, a class, walking, biking, etc. Just whatever you like. 

-Time dependent things are good to get yourself going. Again, this is limited by the pandemic, but for normal times, can you meet a friend for breakfast? Can you schedule your appointment so you have to get to it before you start work? When I was in college, I used to go to morning gym classes before my first class of the day. This got me up and if I was 5 minutes late, it was better to do that for a gym class than a physics class. Bonus because it was exercise and I could focus better on the class. 

-In classes, try to find a notes buddy or study group. That way, if you zoned out a moment, you can ask them for the notes from that section and vice versa. Also, meeting up with them is a great way to have a set time to study. 

For General Anxiety/ Depression: 

-This is going to sound cheesy as fuck, but: Make a list for what you are good at. Things you like about yourself. Things you have accomplished. They don’t have to be super deep, but can be. Do you like your nose? Can you paint your nails well? Are you good at understanding your cat? Are you good at writing? Drawing? Did you overcome a bad test and still manage to pass a class?  If you have a friend or significant other that you are comfortable with, ask them to help maybe. Keep this list for when you feel like shit. 

-Yoga. I’m sorry to put this on here because it seems like the most neurotypical advice, but. I honestly love this shit. If you haven’t given it a shot, there’s a reason why people like it. You don’t have to belong to a gym to try it. I highly recommend Yoga with Adrienne. She has some great beginner videos. 

-Take breaks from social media and news as needed. Seriously. You are a single person and can’t fix everything. Do what you can (share the information, make a donation, join in mutual aid efforts, etc.) but doom scrolling and obsessing won’t help anyone. If you won’t do it for yourself, consider that burning yourself out will make you unable to help later on. 

-Create things. They don’t have to be amazing. Crocheting, knitting, drawing, writing, etc. Having something that you can look at and be like “I made that” is really satisfying. Youtube has some great tutorials for pretty much anything. For drawing, I really like Proko. He has some great videos on drawing faces. But again: IT DOESN’T NEED TO BE GOOD. 

General Resources/ Advice:

-If you are currently in college, most campuses will have groups for counseling and even limited one on one sessions. Usually, these counseling groups are free and the one on one sessions can help you find a counselor nearby. 

-How to ADHD. Seriously I love this youtube channel. She goes over how ADHD affects the brain and has seriously helped me understand it better. 

-The Trevor Project. For LGBTQ teens and youth. They have a hotline and many other resources.  

-If what is stopping you from getting therapy is the idea that you are being dramatic/ are not that bad/ others have it worse: Go get therapy. What are we going to do, find the one person who has it the worst off than anyone and only they are allowed to feel bad and get help? Screw that. Get some help. 

-Remember that there are good things in your future. Where ever you are in life, you have something positive in your future, even if you don’t know it yet. One day, there will be a moment when you look back on the dark times and be so glad you didn’t give up. 

-Obligatory: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/  (1-800-273-8255). This is national suicide prevention lifeline, for the US. They can help. 

-https://www.crisistextline.org/ For when you don’t like phone calls, try texting instead. Has US, Canada, UK, and Ireland numbers. 

[nobodyfamousposts]

Miraculous Ladybug/DC - Adoption AU

There seems to be a lot of Miraculous/DC crossover ideas, often with Adrien and/or Marinette getting adopted into the Batfamily.

Here is my take:

So it turns out that apparently Gabriel had family he tries to avoid and altogether pretends don’t exist. 

And it turns out the family in question he’s particularly wanting to keep out of his life and away from his family is Harley Quinn.

To be fair, they weren’t close to begin with. Then there was the whole thing with Joker and her stint as a villain. After that, Gabriel cut off all contact and moved to Paris.

Harley gets why. She doesn’t like it, but she gets it. She’s made mistakes and is trying to do better. She understands if Gabriel isn’t feeling all that forgiving or willing to reconnect. And she is fine with that, really.

What she is NOT fine with is discovering Mr. No-fun lost his wife in mysterious circumstances and has responded by not only isolating himself, but his son as well. His son who is a genuinely sweet and wonderful kid, and deserves so much better than being kept trapped in a quiet and lonely old mansion every day.

So she does what any good aunt would do if they’re a psychologist who used to be an underling and abuse victim for a psychotic clown whom she’s recently escaped from, found herself a girlfriend, and is past the point of having kids of her own.

She steals Adrien.

Well, from the mansion at least. Only from there. Not wanting to take him away from what little social life he’s managed to make so far despite Gabriel’s best efforts, Harley has them all stay in Paris. She even buys a nice house in a good district with money that was totally not stolen from Gabriel on her way out *coughcough*. Once set up in the new home, she proceeds to take Adrien there where she can dote on him like proper family and give him some of that affection he’s been so desperate for.

The wax figure of Adrien has been left in his place in the mansion.

Gabriel has yet to notice.

As has anyone else. (They’ve had at least 3 photoshoots so far with just the wax figure.)

Ivy finds the whole thing questionable but comes to see that Adrien is a sweet boy with a desire to do good even if he doesn’t necessarily know how or the best way to do so. She decides she can “raise him right” and mold him into a proper young man who uses his resources to help the environment. So she starts having him do gardening with her.

Adrien is...actually okay with this whole setup. Plus he went from no mom to TWO moms! Who spend time with him! And are involved in his life! And let him see his friends! And he actually gets to leave the house without a bodyguard tailing his every move—which turns out to be because Ivy is able to use her plants to keep an eye on him in a much less obtrusive manner, but eh...details. He’s essentially not-so-reluctantly kidnapped. He COULD escape at any point. He’s Chat Noir after all. But even if he wasn’t, it wasn’t like Ivy and Harley were going out of their way to keep him locked up or anything. The worst they did was give him a curfew—which when comparing a few hours of free time with an expectation to return by a set time vs a set schedule with only one hour of free time maybe worked in somewhere, was hardly something he was going to fight.

The fact is that he’s doing well under their care. Harley shares his sense of humor. Pamela nurtures his creativity. He gets support and encouragement to be more assertive. They actually WANT to talk to him and hear about his day. They WANT to be affectionate with him and have dinners together. And he just soaks up their attention and affection like a sponge and responds in kind.

Under their care, Adrien changes a bit. He speaks out more and makes it known when he’s unhappy or uncomfortable with something. He does not let people just touch him when he’s uncomfortable. If anything, he’s doing more touching and initiating conversations without fear of appearances. Nino gets bro hugs. Kim gets bro hugs. All the guys in class get bro hugs. Marinette also gets bro hugs—though he doesn’t hug her for too long since she seems to overheat easily.

Adrien is really enjoying this.

Even better, his moms somehow get jobs in the area.

Pamela either becomes a biology teacher at the school or opens a nursery. If she does open a nursery, Marinette becomes a regular customer on principle. She and Ivy bond. They trade gardening tips. Marinette is surprisingly helpful in keeping pests away from her plants for reasons Ivy doesn’t quite know. All around, Paris suddenly starts becoming a bit more green…and without the eco-terrorism. It helps that Adrien’s social media starts featuring him planting trees and taking care of plants, which is encouraging other people to follow suit.

Harleen becomes a school counselor. At Adrien’s school. Where she takes full advantage of the opportunity to embarrass him in full “overly affectionate mom” mode. Adrien is too happy to be embarrassed. Anyone who actually ends up laughing at him comes to regret it when Harley picks apart their psychological issues.

The new moms evaluate his friends.

Nino passes. Flat out. He got akumatized trying to throw their boy a birthday party? He also arranged an impromptu house party for Adrien the one chance he got? YES. THIS is someone he needs in his life!

Alya gives them concern given her Lois Lane levels of getting into trouble mixed with sheer lack of self preservation. Her tendency to jump into matters and reveal things or trust things without thinking also has them concerned.

Chloe has potential, but needs a good few months of therapy as far as they’re concerned.

Lila is banned from coming within ten feet of Adrien. It would have been fifty, but Adrien refused to take a killer plant that big and risk anyone thinking it’s an akuma.

Marinette passes after they have a sit down talk with her to get to know her better. Harley notes her anxiety issues and helps her to be able to avoid panicking. Ivy likes Marinette’s energy, and her garden is impressive. She gives her approval of Marinette courting their son.

Marinette: Wait—what?

And because they’re actually good moms, they figure out fairly quickly that their new son is the leather-suited catboy running around protecting Paris.

Harley: HOW DO PEOPLE NOT KNOW THIS?!

Adrien: Magic?

They have a bit of difficulty for the next few fights with the rather overprotective mothers trying to interfere in akuma fights, causing more confusion than anything until Adrien asks them to stop. They don’t, of course, but they at least let him try to handle things.

All in all, they make for a nice little family.

But there’s only so much two moms can do. And with Gabriel pretty much not involved, they’re limited in options. So after a while, they decide that Adrien needs a good father figure.

Adrien: But I have a father...

Harley: I said a GOOD father figure.

But who to choose?

Bats? “Oh god, no! Why would you inflict that level of broodiness in our child?”

Joker? “Sure! The best way to teach him important life skills is to have someone to test them on as an example. Like the best weak points! And the effects of blood loss! And how to hide a body!” “We could just use Gabriel for that and save on travel time!”

Superman? “The world isn’t ready.”

They finally come to a decision.

Which is how Nightwing finds himself tied up and dragged off to Paris to be made part of this weird little makeshift family.

Pamela: Why him?

Harley: He got the killer Robin from ‘murdery’ to some semblance of being an actual semi-healthy child with only some violent tendencies. He’d make a good father figure!

Pamela: But wasn’t that an alternate timeline—

Harley: A GOOD father figure.

Pamela: ...fine.

Nightwing: Wait—what?

Naturally, he’s confused. He tries to contact Batman to let him know what’s going on and what Ivy and Harley are up to because they’re in Paris for some odd reason and they have a kid he’s pretty sure isn’t theirs. Batman, on the other hand, is more concerned with all the crazy magic shenanigans in Paris that the League somehow doesn't know about and can’t get any accurate information on. So he pretty much tells Nightwing to stay with them since he’s already there and they have room for him anyway so it’ll be easier.

Nightwing: I'm telling you, they've captured me, dragged me off to Paris, and they have this little house with a kid—

Batman: Good, then you have a place to stay while you investigate the anomalies in Paris.

Nightwing: Bruce, I don't think you're hearing me...

Adrien: (Just pats him on the arm sympathetically)

Harley: (Hugs Nightwing) Looks like we've got Batdaddy's approval! You're part of the family now!

Nightwing: I will do whatever you want. Just don't call him that again.

To be fair, it is Batman, so he probably knows Harley and Ivy aren’t an issue at this point, but still!

…At least he gets his own room…

Nightwing isn’t sure what to think. On the one hand, he knows he shouldn’t be encouraging this. On the other hand, Harley and Ivy aren’t actually doing anything bad. And if anything, taking care of the kid has been good for them. Plus the kid seems happy with them, at least. It’s...weird, certainly, but he goes along with it. (Read: He folds to the kitten eyes.)

Then he finds out said kid is a superhero in a city regularly attacked by a supervillain who transforms and controls people by manipulating their emotions—which the League somehow has not been aware of despite it happening in PARIS.

Needless to say, he isn’t pleased.

I'm just imaging Dick Grayson interacting with other adult figures in Paris. And really, just Dick's response to everything in Paris and how things are being handled.

"So...you're telling me no one has tried to track down where the magic butterflies are coming from?"

"Um..."

"The governmental body hasn't initiated any policies to try to prevent akumas?"

"Well..."

"Set up an alert and evacuation system so people know where to go or not go?"

“…”

“Do I want to know what you people actually do in case of an emergency?”

“Probably not.”

Much like Ivy and Harley, he gets a day job to help out. There are two potential options for him.

He becomes a teacher at the school and takes over running gym class, which he uses to keep the kids in shape, teach them self defense, and help them work out some of their tension and emotions through physical activities and a good listening ear. His interactions with the kids would be something to see. Even better for his interactions with Damocles and Bustier. Because no, the events of the Ladybug episode would NOT have happened if he was there.

Lila: (Sobs) Ow! Ow! The pain! How could Marinette do this to me?

Dick: I’m not seeing any injuries.

Lila: I don’t bruise easily. They just haven’t appeared yet.

Dick: Even so, there are no abrasions. No swelling. No indications of a broken bone or sprain. Not even any marks to show where you fell.

Lila: It’s internal!

Dick: Then you need to go to a hospital to be checked out and have the extent of your injuries noted.

Lila: I wouldn’t go that far—

Dick: And your mother will be contacted and told to meet us there.

Lila: Well—

Dick: And of course we’ll be holding off on any punishment until we have a list of your injuries and a thorough investigation is completed.

Lila: But—

Dick: And just to keep you safe, I’ll be staying with you the whole time. We wouldn’t want anymore “accidents”.

Lila: ….Dammit.

OR

He joins the police force. Just for shenanigans in his interactions with Roger. Maybe helping the force to be more effective so they can actually HELP during akuma fights instead of simply serving as a temporary distraction.

Either way, he’s a positive role model for Adrien. The three of them working together help Adrien to maintain a positive and altogether healthier state. They give him more jokes and puns to work with—because that has long since been Nightwing’s area of expertise. They give him advice in wooing his lady love. They address the “just a friend” issue. They teach him self defense and helpful fighting techniques. They curb the “self-sacrificing” tendency he’s developed. They encourage him in his goals and self discovery now that he has the freedom to actually try.

Despite the weirdness of the situation, Adrien is actually happier than he has been in a long while.

Which is made ever more clear at a particular moment when he’s leaving for school one morning.

“Bye, Mom! Bye, Mom! Bye, Dad!”

Harley sniffles and wipes a tear with a tissue she pulled out of her sleeve. “It feels like just yesterday that I stole him away from the mansion.”

“Then what does that make your kidnapping me?” Dick asked, sardonically. “This morning?”

“Don’t act like you’re not proud.” Ivy snarked.

Oh, he was. Immensely so. But of course he wasn’t going to admit it and give them the satisfaction.

[howtobeapersonwithfibro]

Disabled Sci-Fi: Internship-seeking Veronica

Here (below the cut) is the next short story in my Disabled Sci-Fi series. It centers around Veronica Lee, a wheelchair user living on a colony spaceship. She’s just finished high school and is looking for an intern position in her favorite field: science.

Feedback (and suggestions for future stories) always welcome :) I just really enjoy writing about disabled characters using the knowledge I’ve picked up about experiences from spoonie/disability tumblr and being disabled myself. 

*****

Veronica takes a deep breath. She adjusts her position in her wheelchair to be a bit more comfortable. Tries to resist the urge to strangle the woman across the table. 

“As you know, Ms. Lee,” the woman in the stiff, gray clothes continues, “Everyone has a role to play on the ship. We begin to look for career matches at age sixteen so that everyone can find their ideal role. I just imagine that our choices will be… limited… given your situation.” 

Inwardly, Veronica rolls her eyes. Sometimes she may as well have three heads, for the way people struggle to talk to her like a normal person. Like being unable to walk is a situation and not just another detail of her life, like having straight hair. “I know why you might think that,” Veronica replies, choosing her words carefully. This woman is the only career counselor for the entire ship, so she doesn’t have the option of pissing her off. “But I think that accommodations can be made for most of the jobs around here. It’s not like I’m asking to be a zero-gravity engineer. And my chair can get almost anywhere, with all the ramps.”

The gray woman gives a small, forced smile, and says, “Alright then. What are your areas of interest?”

“I’m most interested in biology,” Veronica says, relieved to be talking about something else. “Whether it’s working in the medical wing or in a lab, I’m just really interested in those kinds of things.” 

“Hmm,” the woman mutters, scrolling through a document on the screen in front of her. “There’s an open trainee position in the botany lab. Job description includes… let’s see here… working with microscopes and other various tools to alter plants and fight disease…” 

“Sounds great. I was good with microscopes in my classes.” Maybe this is actually going to be fine, Veronica thinks. 

“I’m looking over the images of the lab,” the woman goes on, “and all of the counters are standard-height. I’m not sure if you’d be able to reach everything you needed to--”

“Adjustments can be made,” Veronica interrupts. 

“It’s just that the lab has very strict rules about what kind of furniture can be present, due to cleaning procedures, and…” she sighs. “I’m sorry. The system is quite inflexible sometimes, but the procedures are important for optimal plant growth.”

“The system is only as inflexible as we make it,” Veronica argues. “Please, just put me down for the trial position. I can talk to my trainer about making things work.” 

The woman sighs. “I suppose I can do that. If it’s not a good fit, we can always try something else. I hear the food service wing has a variety of opportunities.”

Yes, Veronica thinks, because my perfect grades and area of interest just scream “food service”. But she’s getting a shot at what she wants, so she’s going to do her best to tolerate this prejudiced woman. “Um, thank you. I’ll see how the botany job goes first.”

“Wonderful,” the woman says, in a rehearsed, not-very-wonderful tone. “All of the information has been sent to your messages app. The position starts next week, but you’ll want to look over everything to make sure you’re prepared.” 

***

The next day, Veronica has an appointment to meet her training supervisor and talk with him about the lab and the work they do there. When she arrives at the lab wing and wheels through the sliding doors, she is faced with a bored-looking receptionist who barely glances up from his screen. Once he sees her chair, he looks up again, muttering, “Can I help you with something? Are you lost?”

Lost, she inwardly huffs, desperately trying not to roll her eyes. Because they’re not used to seeing someone who looks like me around here. She takes a breath, then says, “Um, actually, I’m here to meet with Dr. Stonecroft about the trainee position. Veronica Lee? Meeting set for 10:30?”

The young man takes a moment to process this, then says, “Oh, right, I see it in here. I’ll send a message to Dr. Stonecroft that you’re here.”

As she waits, Veronica mentally steels herself for the argument she expects will come. She spent most of the night lying awake thinking of her rebuttals to various questions, and obsessing about it via messaging with her friend Lila until she fell asleep and stopped responding. 

Veronica wanted this job so badly. She couldn’t imagine being stuck somewhere like food service her entire life, not when she had such an interest in science. 

A door behind the receptionists’ desk slid open, and through it walked a short, brown-skinned man with round glasses and a lab coat. “You must be Veronica,” he said, greeting her with a smile and extending his hand down to shake hers. “Herman Stonecroft, glad to finally meet you. Please, come with me.”

She followed him eagerly, squeezing carefully through a narrow doorway that barely allowed room for her fingers to move the wheelchair without getting squished. When it widened into a hallway, Dr. Stonecroft slowed to walk by her side, guiding her first into the greenhouse. 

It was one of the most beautiful places Veronica had ever seen. Most of the places on the ship were dull shades of gray, sparingly decorated because supplies had to be conserved. But this room was alive with color: Red tomatoes and berries hanging on vines, nearly ripe enough to pick; yellow peppers and another plant that Veronica couldn’t identify; and green, green everywhere, from the early sprouts in their hydroponic rows to the leaves of fruit trees and tall corn stalks. 

“This is amazing,” Veronica said. “I’ve never seen so many plants in one place. And it smells so… fresh,” she added, trying out a word she hadn’t had much cause to use before. Little in life was fresh when you lived in space.

Dr. Stonecroft smiled. “I remember thinking that the first time I came here too. The greenhouse is lovely, of course, and very showy, but most of our work is done back in the labs. We’ll come to water the plants, but other workers harvest them. We spend most of our time managing disease and keeping our plants strong. Our effort is vital to maintain food supply.”

“Right, of course,” she replied, not discouraged. “It’s just a privilege to be able to see all of this. They let us each grow a bean plant in science class, and I thought that was cool.”

“I’ll show you to the labs now,” Dr. Stonecroft said, leading her through a large set of double doors at the back of the room. They led into a hallway with a few other doors, and she could see through the glass walls that each contained lab benches with microscopes and other instruments. 

He scanned his badge at one of the doors, and it slid open to allow them through. Veronica noticed that all of the countertops were slightly above eye level for her; she couldn’t imagine getting her arms up there to work productively, let alone looking into a microscope that sat even higher. But Dr. Stonecroft didn’t seem to notice the disparity. He continued right on with his enthusiastic introduction as a few scientists turned from their work to stare at her. 

“We start most of our interns out with basic microscopy - slide preparation, cell counting, studying images to learn signs of abnormal growth. You’ll help tend some of the plants as well. And of course you’d be led through this by another team member when I’m not available. You wouldn’t be expected to do anything on your own for some time - I know that the school’s science department was a bit lacking in resources.”

“That sounds great,” Veronica said. “I thought microscopy was really cool, but we only had two microscopes for the whole class to use, and they were pretty old. So I’ll be happy to learn as much as possible here.” 

Dr. Stonecroft smiled. He was fairly soft spoken, and Veronica had decided already that she would enjoy learning from him - if this worked out. “I’m glad to hear that, Veronica,” he began. “I wish more students had your interest in this area. I’ve had several trainees think that they were here to water plans and pick fruit, and decided to quit when they learned it was much more.”

Veronica nodded. It seemed like this was a really promising opportunity. “Right. But, Dr. Stonecroft, we should probably talk about -- I mean, I’m sure you noticed. I’m in a wheelchair. I can’t exactly reach the lab countertops, or the ground-level planters. The lady at the career center mentioned that sometimes regulations don’t allow certain furniture, but--”

“Veronica,” he said, stopping her. “Let me tell you something. I have never turned an interested student away, and I don’t plan to now. I will saw the legs off of some lab benches myself if necessary.” He gave her a small but knowing smile. “As long as you like it here, we will be lucky to have you.”

It felt like a weight had been lifted off of Veronica’s chest. Sure, she could still see a couple of the scientists side-eyeing her as they pretended to get on with their work. Sure, not everyone would be used to her at first. But her mentor was open-minded and friendly. And everyone else would get used to her and her chair, especially once she showed them the kind of work she could do. 

She hadn’t met someone like Dr. Stonecroft in a long time - someone who just treated her like a person, instead of a person in a wheelchair. She felt pressure behind her eyes, excited and happy tears, and hurried to wipe one away before he could notice. “Thank you so much, Dr. Stonecroft. I’m so excited to start here.”

Dr. Stonecroft escorted her back to the entrance. “We will see you Monday, Veronica.” 

Once the sliding door to the lab wing closed behind her, she let her smile break open wide and wheeled as fast as she could down the quiet hallways, barely able to contain herself. When she was finally home, the door closed behind her, she screeched with delight. “Yes! I did it!” she yelled to no one in particular. For once, she thought with a contented sigh, something finally worked out. 

[eliteprepsat]

With 2020 in the rearview and the hopes of a better year in sight, resolutions have no doubt been on many minds. New Year’s resolutions can be a great way to reset at the start of the calendar. They allow one to check in with themselves and to assess what deserves greater personal focus into the future.

Whether making a resolution (or two, or three) is new to you or a common practice, here is a list of resolutions specific to high school students that you might consider undertaking in 2021.

1. Improve your grades

Whether it’s resolving to score higher on your weekly reading quizzes or to go from a B to an A in math, try taking actionable steps to reach your goal. What is necessary to better succeed on those reading quizzes? Taking better notes? Going over assigned chapters twice? And what do you need to achieve that A? Staying after class to ask your teacher about the problems you missed? Visiting your school’s tutoring center? Improved grades don’t magically happen to us. Instead, we need to take the initiative to make them happen. So, go the extra step, and see how your grades improve.

2. Become a better student

The best students aren’t simply those with the best GPA. Beyond improving your grades, you can also resolve to become a better overall student this year. Participating more in class, asking teachers about extra credit opportunities, assisting classmates who could use extra help in a strong subject of yours. These are just a few ways that you can become a better student. What other ways come to mind?

Becoming a better student has many benefits. For example, voicing your thoughts by participating more in class can aid in developing your critical thinking skills. It also displays to teachers your interest in their course and your ability to lead. This likely won’t be forgotten when teachers calculate your final course grades, and it will also come in handy when you hope to receive a favorable letter of recommendation from them for college.

3. Focus on actual learning

Grades are important. Even more important, though, is actual learning. This means not just memorizing a vocabulary list for a quiz only to instantly forget it. It means internalizing lessons for greater purpose.

How do you go about this? Build a course schedule that will assist in a career you could imagine yourself pursuing. This might mean taking classes at your local trade school or taking AP classes so that you can test out of required courses in college to focus more on your major. Regardless, in all of your classes, always consider how the material can help you in practical, real-world applications.

4. Expand your mind

Don’t forget that there is also so much to learn beyond the subjects offered in high school. What new things would you like to try to learn or do this year? Learn how to code? How to tap dance? Or throw a pot on a ceramics wheel? The possibilities are literally endless, and so are the resources available to you. Research what kinds of classes are offered to high schoolers at your local community college. Perhaps your own school even offers enriching clubs you don’t yet know about. And, of course, there is no shortage of books, documentaries, and podcasts out there (many of them often free) to assist you in expanding your knowledge, too.

5. Expand your sphere

In addition to expanding your mind, you may also wish to expand your sphere in the new year. “Networking” can be very important for success—in school and beyond. So, whenever you can, reach out to teachers, counselors, tutors, and even friends to build up your network. You never know when you might need to call upon those you know for help.

6. Focus on your school-life balance

Education is extremely important, especially as a young person hoping to succeed in high school, college, and into the working world. But it is also extremely important to experience fulfillment outside of school. For more on improving your school-life balance, see our previous articles “4 Tips For Finding Balance: How to Study and Still Have a Life” and “A Guide to Achieving a Healthier School-Life Balance”.

7. Focus on self-care

After 2020, we could all stand to focus more on our personal self-care. Self-care involves nourishing all facets of one’s mental and physical health. What requires tending to in your self-care routine? Getting more fresh air or exercise throughout the day? Drinking more water or sticking to a regular sleep schedule? Stretching, meditating, or even just committing to flossing every day are all good goals that will add to your mental and physical wellbeing.

8. “Unplug”

While social media keeps us connected, helps us learn, and supports our creativity, it also has damaging effects. Studies have shown that too much scrolling on our phones increases feelings of isolation, inadequacy, depression, and anxiety. This likely isn’t news to you. But how do you break the cycle? If you think that you may spend too much time on social media, resolve to limit your use in the new year. A few tips include disabling notifications, leaving your phone behind when you go to bed for the night, and even removing one or more social media apps from your phone altogether. You can also redirect your attentions from social media to your offline friends and interests.

9. Break a bad habit

Excessive social media use can be quite a bad habit. What other bad habits might you benefit from axing in the new year? Biting your nails? Eating too many sweets? What about gossiping or even cursing? Write your intention on a piece of paper or share it with a family member or friend who can support you in your quitting efforts. And feel free to reward yourself when you’ve made strides toward achieving your goal.

10. Kick procrastination to the curb

But what if your bad habit is putting things off? Kick procrastination to the curb this year by trying to identify the cause of your procrastination. Are you easily distracted? Do your best to eliminate distractions at the outset of tasks. Are you simply overwhelmed by the task at hand? Break it down into more manageable parts on a to-do list. And again, don’t forget to reward yourself—both as you cross steps off of your to-do list and when you finally complete an entire task.

11. Get organized

Can you never seem to find your favorite pen? Your comfiest sweater? Does it take you ten minutes just to locate that history report on your laptop because your home screen is loaded with so many files? Perhaps your New Year’s resolution could be to focus on your organizational skills. Work to declutter your desk, your closet, your computer, or any other area in your life that always seems to be in the most disarray. Clear your space, and you will also clear your mind.

12. Become a better citizen

Once you’ve decluttered your closet, why not donate your unwanted clothes to a local shelter or thrift store? This is just one way that you can resolve to be a better citizen, giving back to your community in the new year. Other ways to help make the world a better place include assisting with food drives, collecting blankets and other necessities for animal shelters, and becoming a reading buddy for young learners. There should be no shortage of volunteer opportunities in your area. And with a simple Google search, you can discover them all.

13. Reach out to old friends and/or family

Miss your best pal from seventh grade? Only talk to your favorite cousin on holidays? Give them a call or shoot them an email to initiate a closer relationship this year. Don’t be afraid to take the first step. It’s amazing how quickly and seamlessly true friends and/or family can pick up where they left off when they reconnect.

14. Make a new friend

Alternately, you can always add to your roster of exiting friends. No number of friends is too many—especially when the friends are quality. Is there someone you know as more of an acquaintance who seems like a potential pal? Ask to sit with them in class or at lunch. Invite them to an event. Though it may be awkward at first, you’ll find that most people appreciate being reached out to as a friend. After all, don’t you?

15. Be a better friend

Although it’s true that no number of friends is too many, it’s also true that—as the dictum holds—quality is more important than quantity when it comes to relationships. So, how can you be a better friend? Practicing being a better listener is a great place to start. These articles from The New York Times and Psychology Today provide great tips on how to be a better listener.

16. Practice gratitude

This can take many forms. For example, you can practice gratitude by more regularly writing “thank you” cards to loved ones. Or you can begin each day by naming out loud three things that make you happy. You could also keep a gratitude journal, board or jar (on/in which you regularly write down things for which you’re thankful). Practicing gratitude can help to make you feel more outwardly compassionate and more inwardly positive and satisfied. According to a Harvard medical study, it can even improve your physical health. So, try one or a few of these practices in the new year, and see how it makes you feel.

A few final thoughts and recommendations

Remember that your resolutions can be as small or as big as you like. Often, setting smaller, more manageable goals is best, since you can more readily and frequently see your progress along the way. But don’t be afraid to set “shoot for the moon” goals, as well. Indeed, the old adage is true that you can accomplish just about anything you set your mind to. But also remember the wise words of Ralph Waldo Emerson, who said that the greatest accomplishment is “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you into something else.” So, whatever your resolutions for 2021, just be sure that they are right for you.

Serious about keeping your New Year’s resolutions? Check out Day by Day, Habitify, or Habitica—just three of many apps  that allow you to keep visual track of your goals and your progress in achieving them. Such apps can help you to stay better focused and motivated on resolutions, and each is unique—from the more analytics-driven Habitify to the RPG-style Habitica.

And if you would prefer an app that is more tailored to a specific resolution, check out this list from PCMag, which includes apps for working on better eating, exercising, budgeting, and more.

Stacy G. is a writer and teacher who has taught composition, literature, and creative writing courses at a number of public and private universities across the U.S. She has also taught SAT, AP English, and Literature SAT Subject Test courses at Elite Prep. She likes poetry, dogs, and poetry about dogs.

[mouthtrashworld]

HEAR ME OUT: PARIS HILTON INSPIRED ME TO GO TO ART SCHOOL

HEAR ME OUT: PARIS HILTON INSPIRED ME TO GO TO ART SCHOOL AND BECOME A FILMMAKER.

My sister and I played it cool until my parents dark purple grand caravan left the driveway. We knew we had to conceal our excitement of being home alone for a few hours in order to not seem suspicious. It was our chance to watch whatever trash was on television that day without the normal censorship our parents had set on us. My mother strived to win the gold medal for being a helicopter parent and my dad just agreed with whatever she said. Somehow we were always a step ahead of them. There was a vast lack of communication within my household which lead me to crave answers and sneak around to get them.

We really made a day of it. We pulled our big fluffy comforters off our beds and brought them to the couch, gathered every unhealthy snack from our cabinet (which was difficult as my mother kept a strict, low carb, low sodium, no sugar menu to chose from in our house) and hung heavy blankets over the windows to block out the glare on the 30 inch Panasonic VHS combo unit. My older sister, Cate, had control over the remote, she knew which channel number MTV played on and she memorized the Parental Control Password that was set on various channels that aired the exact rubbish it was to protect us from, but quickly became our favorite shows. At the time I didn’t even really know how Cate found out these shows existed. Our amount of media consumption was little to none. Living in a tiny town in Pennsylvania, attending private Christian school and hardly having a social life; our only connection to whats out there

would be the local blockbuster that my mother skirted us in and then quickly out of after renting wholesome family movies. I remember slipping away from my moms watch just long enough to find the “1 Night in Paris” sex tape DVD that was made in 2004 with Rick Salomon (who by the way has been married to Pamela Anderson TWICE!) and Paris Hilton as the star. A few years later, The Simple Life, featuring Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie became a huge success for Fox and was later taken over by E! network. The glimpse of the DVD cover was so scandalous I felt guilty just for looking at it. We were a few years late, really just catching the reruns of the show that E!, MTV or VH1 would play during the middle of the day, but we ate it up nonetheless.

The first episode I ever watched was on Season 5. The two girls become camp counselors and every week a different theme and set of campers come in to encounter their shenanigans. This episode was “Fat Camp” and the first order of business was for Paris and Nicole to give the campers enema’s before they start their week of dieting and exercise. It was absolutely ridiculous. I felt bad that these campers who fell victim to their bratty comments, yet my sister and I couldn’t take our eyes off it. Reality TV works in that way you know, where you feel bad, but not bad enough because its not your life.

Soon Cate and I started adding other reality shows to our pallet of rebellion. The Girls Next Door, a reality show about Hugh Hefner’s girlfriends living in the Playboy Mansion. Real World Cancun, AKA Jersey Shore before there was Jersey Shore. And of course The Hills where Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag live it up in Orange County, a place I

thought was made up until I visited there in 2014. But the Simple Life remained my favorite of them all. But Paris Hilton was my first glimpse of glamour, so she always remained my favorite. Granted, Kim Kardashian has seemed to surpass her on many levels after starting out as her intern. And sure maybe Paris is an heiress who will never run out of money or resources and people behind her, producing her, but Miss Hilton found a savvy way to brand herself right at the pinnicale of the internet and she still had to work for it. As a filmmaker I am hyper aware of the way we consume media, which is why I’ve taken such an interest to Paris and this manipulation she had turned into an art form.

Before we go on, in case you don’t know how Paris got famous, I’m here to give you a brief backstory. Paris Hilton, heiress to the Hilton Hotels empire, was actually raised a lot like me. Her parents were strict. She wasn’t allowed to wear makeup or have much of a social life. I believe her parents knew what kind of name she bared and the harsh reality that could come with it, so they kept her on a tight leash. Despite their efforts to keep her tame she slipped away, out into the world long enough to meet famous photographer David LaChapelle, who became enamored with Paris and her sister Nicky, and insisting he take their photo. She knew it was highly against her parents rules to engage in that kind of activity but she went for it. He designed an elaborate set and costumes for them and they went ahead naively thinking the photos would be just for them to admire in private but were later were published in a 2001 Vanity Fair issue, getting her in a whole lot of trouble. She later had to turn down and offer to do Playboy because her parents would disinherit her. By the time she was 18 her career as a model

and professional partier could really take off. Paris became absolutely obsessed with fame. She came up with a formulated routine on how to grab the paparazzi’s attention. She would find all the places photographers would be hanging out that day and go to every single location just to be seen and her plan really seemed to work. She was the bright and shining star of every tabloid in America. She describes in the documentary film, “American Meme” how desperate she was, spending hours searching for a place with someone, anyone to take her picture no matter what it took. Her paparazzi access seemed responsible for Paris to become a household name. — add on?

We have to remember that this time, 2007-2009, was a turning point, as smart phones and blackberries were now in almost every American’s pocket and we were craving the tea more than ever. Tabloids started working around the clock to deliver us the latest scoop at the now possible all hours of the day; i.e. the tragedies of Amy Whinehouse, LiLo and her drug escapades, Britney Spears and her hairless melt down, the list goes on. We asked for it, we got it and kept asking for more. After Paris sought out these outlets, the offers poured in. Her own show, movie roles, modeling for brand name designers, she became a DJ, became an author, a business woman, a fashion designer she owns hotels in Dubai and is currently carrying a hefty 10.5 million instagram follower count.

I know what you’re thinking, like okay so who cares about this rich “bimbo” (dubbed courtesy of a New York Post article circa 2007) but just hear me out. Most of us can relate to her story and if not, at least to some of her tactics. What I grew to realize after becoming social media obsessed (possibly because I was deprived as a child) is that

no matter how information changes or what new technology comes to pass it along to us, we will always be doing it in the same way. I watched Myspace come and pass, seeing thousands of singers, bands and actresses get discovered through that site, even some playmates in Playboy magazine. I saw Facebook allow us to put every single thing about our lives on blast at any minute of the day. Twitter allows us to barf our thoughts up in once 180, now 280 characters, Vine stars made 6 seconds videos and now make 6 figures from their fame and last but not least Instagram, and trust me when I say I cringe having to say this, “influencers” sell to us with every photo or video they post. Whether that be a lifestyle, a product or just themselves as a person. A vast majority of us have to admit that we are drinking the juice. We ourselves are partaking in marketing our “best life” being lived via Instagram. So ask yourself, what is the difference between what we are doing on the Gram versus what Paris was doing in 2006, showcasing her persona to the media in the only way it was accessible at the time? Why not manipulate it the same way it manipulates us? Find out where the quote on quote Paparazzi are and market yourself the same way reality stars did.

Not that I have the intention to come up in the same way some of these heiresses who’s names are already famous or these vine stars or twitter comedians did but I have the power to show a portion of the world who I am and what I can do to earn my career as a filmmaker and communicator via social media.

I realized that what I was doing as a little kid, waiting for my parents to leave to seek a world outside my own is exactly what Paris did. She took the risk and got the answers.

Her obsession with fame coincided with my obsession with social media, to communicate and or get my work out there. I’m just trying to work system to brand myself. My research shows that the reality show we down load from an app store and place in our pockets has led me to some big wins. Upon getting hired for shoots or my work recognized in some way, I see there is a formula to the entire thing. When to post, how to post, who to follow, etc. I have no producers behind me to curate my Instagram, I have no connection to someone with a big name. All I have is myself to show for what I can do and if I keep going back to the place with the most access to the loudest voices , like Paris did I may have a shot at getting my own voice out there and I will say more important things than “thats hot” I promise you.

In the end I think that the reason I clung to Paris and her story so deeply was because it was virtually first and foremost example I had and to as impressionable young woman, that kind of thing sticks. The definition of success and how to obtain it was taught to me was by sneaking her show on a Saturday afternoon while my parents when to Shop Rite without me. I’ve just stayed observing all the ways fame has developed via internet and can lead to success. But the beauty of the defying gravity factor is that this blond “bimbo” and many other “bimbos” like her have done the same thing, most without the Hilton name. All I did was think twice before I believed that reality television was just a trashy phase. Instead I realized that I, like many others, am still consuming similar content in 2009 now in 2019, the difference is its in the palm of my hand and I’m deciding to take advantage of it.

[fairycosmos]

tried to kill myself last week n slept it off for 24+ hrs before telling my mom. she couldnt take me to the hospital bc we don’t have insurance n my case manager ended up calling dcs /: (ill be 17 next month) rn i feel like theyre waiting for me to say myself i dont wanna live here rather than just removing me bc technically i am safe but im not ready to do that even tho i know i should let them find me help. i feel like theyre waiting for me to mess up to decide themselves. i just feel lost man

oh god, i’m sorry for the late response and that you’re in this position at all, man :( i literally cant imagine how difficult everything must feel right now, and i dont blame you at all for being lost. most 16 yo olds are, but add something like this into the mix, and it’s no surprise that you’re feeling so conflicted and hurt all of the time. i know it hurts to process such vitriolically negative emotions, but it’s also a normal human response. imo, what the real focus should be on, is doing what you can to cope in a healthy or safe way. even if some days, that just looks like crying in your room and waiting for it to pass. but anyway, i want to say that i’m genuinely glad you’re still here, and i hope that one day you can feel that way too. it’s wonderful that you’re alive, and the world would be missing something if you were gone. even if you dont know it right now, and even if you can’t see it in this moment, there is so much growth and positive change waiting in your future. it’s actually inevitable, and nobody really tells you that when you’re a teenager, but it’s kinda true from what i’ve observed. the natural progression of things, the natural process of growing up, makes things feel a lot more manageable. that probably doesn’t feel like a real train of thought to the present day you, but honestly even in the 3 yrs since i was 16, the entire basis of my perspective has changed. especially bc as an adult you’re able to control so much more of your life and the mental health resources that are available to you. it’s all waiting for you, and it’s nothing to be scared of. you dont have to know what to do next and you dont have to have a solid concrete plan. i’m not sure that they’re waiting for you to ‘mess up’, because trying to do what’s right for your own health doesn’t count as ‘messing up’, whatever you decide is okay. it’s a really hard decision to make and i totally understand why you don’t know where to begin. but i think it could help to just have an honest conversation with yourself about what you really need in terms of where you live. try to block out judgement and what you ‘think’ you should do.  where do you see yourself thriving, where you do see your needs being met? where do you see improvement, and guidance? are you able to work with your case manager to figure out some sort of middle ground, some sort of compromise? i get that actually taking such a step is way way easier said than done, but you can take it at your own pace over the course of the next two years while you figure out what would be best for you.

i know you said you don’t have healthcare, and i’m not entirely sure how things work where you are. but do you think it’s possible that there could be a support group for young people in your area, or a mental health center/crisis team, literally anything at all that could lend you some support? maybe you could talk to your case worker about this, too? there could also be someone at school available, like a counselor or even just a teacher you trust. another option is to call a mental health hotline to see what they think your options are. and i know these ideas sound vague, and like theyre impossible to take seriously, but i’d really appreciate it if you gave them some real thought. it’s alright to be scared, but the fear of reaching out literally doesn’t compare to the fear of staying silent and letting this get worse on your own. mental health conditions are just as serious as physical ones and sometimes they need genuine medical attention in order to learn to live with them, and that’s absolutely alright. having someone to talk to who is trained to offer you the tools you need can really make a massive difference. they’ll be able to advise you on what the next step should be, in terms of your personal development. initially saying that you need help out loud is the worst part, sometimes you have to force the words out....but it still counts, every small effort does. i just want you to know that a better future is possible and is much more likely than the awful one you’re envisioning, no matter where you go from here. if you’re unable to receive professional help at this time, then i hope you’re able to engage in healthier coping mechanisms anyway even if they don’t work every time. i’ll leave some links that may be helpful to you when you’re in a low moment. not saying they’re supposed to fix everything, but they’re supposed to calm you down and give you some clarity so you dont make an impulsive decision. i promise you’re capable of pulling yourself back from the brink of sadness, and i promise you’re capable of getting through this. every day you survive, you’re learning how to make it all feel lighter someday. i wouldn’t say any of this if i didn’t believe in you. despite my extremely limited perspective of your life, i can see that you’re smart and you’re young and you just want to find some stability.  the more you focus on yourself and your own well being, even when you want to self destruct, the calmer things will seem. so like i said before, take all the time you need to consider the choices available to you, and then try to get through each day as it comes. if that feels like too much, one hour. minute by minute is more than good enough. im proud of you for surviving and for being the person that you are. if you ever need a friend or if you want to talk, i’ll be here. you’re not as alone as you want to believe, and so many people can relate to your circumstances because they’ve gotten through it. you will, too. you dont have to have it all figured out, that’s not your responsibility. you just have to keep trying and working with what you’ve been given. im rooting for you.

https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2018/11/immediate-coping-mechanisms-for-self-harm

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/depression/teenagers-guide-to-depression.htm

 https://www.healthista.com/15-daily-self-care-tips-help-depression/

https://bebrainfit.com/stress-management-techniques/

[towerofgod-blogposts]

#485.5 Hiatus Post 1

Blog | 2020.09.20 | Translator: AdiosCorea | Report error

​I'm currently living a normal life.

Like everyone else, I get up in the morning, work during the day, eat, and after dinner, wrap up any work left, rest, sleep, then so on and so forth, even into the weekend. But this work load is a lot less compared to when I was actively uploading, and due a few of my assistants suddenly quitting, I needed time to train my new assistants, and I went through a few drafts to fix the scenario, so the process of making new chapters has been delayed. I am sorry.

Still, I exercise two or three times a week for my joints, go on more walks outside compared to when I was uploading, I've been jogging, and I've even caught up with a few of my friends and relatives I haven't seen in a few years.

When I feel lonely and tired, I work out of a cafe, but it's been more difficult going outside due to Covid, so I've been talking to counselors, taking long baths, or put on some Korean reality TV shows while I work.

Now that I put it in writing, it's so normal so I didn't have much to write. It wasn't like a school vacation where I could sleep in all day and max out a character on a game, or traveling all over the country and falling asleep to a beautiful sunset at a beautiful tourist destination. Visiting my ill grandfather, visiting my recently-passed grandmother's grave, all added to the difficult daily life of SIU on break. Ah, actually I haven't been really on break... hehe qq

Since I'm still working with my aching back and wrists, I'm thinking perhaps I would be hearing good words from you if I had been properly resting. I'll start resting properly starting tomorrow.

​Since I don't get paid for my uploads while on hiatus, and I do need to pay my assistants to maintain the studio, so there's that pressure that's been becoming more suffocating, and I thought that if I started uploading soon, I thought I would be pushing my still aching body and mind to the limits, I had this sense that I wanted to come back with as much chapters as possible, which makes it harder to rest. Sometimes I think these days whether I live to upload or if I upload to live.​

​A big thing since I stopped uploading was that I stopped using internet and social media. So I haven't been on the blog, the cafe, or twitter almost at all. Sitting in front of a computer isn't good for the body, nor is it for the heart/mind, so I've been told. Some people tell me that I'm being irresponsble, but I think on the other hand, I sometimes wonder how "isn't it a bit cruel to take this much freedom away from a Freelancer". However, I do feel a sense of relief when I hear that someone else tells me that they're waiting for me to come back.

Adults tell me that your body is your wealth, and I think I've used a lot of it up. So I've been living day by day, hoping to rest tomorrow. I want to protect what's left of my already largely-spent resources. So my goal tomorrow is to rest as well. If I don't get to rest, I am not achieving my goal.

​As an author.... I want to actually start uploading pretty bad. I want my work to be successful in a way that makes sure that I'm healthy and happy. Many people think I'm a successful author, but in actuality because I suffered as many failures as successes, I would enjoy the day when the work and myself both are happy. Actually, I felt quite unfulfilled before I went on hiatus for multiple reasons. And with a feeling of having a lot of the works I've been pushing forward having gone on a black out, I even thought to myself if it would be impossible for me or my work to be happy. I didn't want to keep working with those thoughts in mind. It's hard to talk about this kind of stuff in front of other webtoon authors. I actually know quite well how rare works as successful as mine are. Perhaps this work, myself, and you my readers, are all being too greedy [TN: demand too much of themselves]. Of course, I've always been a hard working author and you have all been very good readers, so even though I fall short, I wanted to fulfill that greed a bit more.

This is certainly a difficult issue.

​Ah... this is getting quite too long hehe.​

Actually, the reason why I quit social media during the hiatus was because of this aspect of myself. If I start writing, I put in too much effort into it, and I review it numerous times in case my meanings get miscommunicated. All of those things eat up my time quite a bit, which interferes with my goal of "let's rest". Actually, the most definitive reason that I quit social media was because I was afraid of the length of the hiatus. Authors feel like criminals when they're on hiatus, haha qq. I really am a criminal qq.

So I'll wrap up the long-coming long-text here.

​Above all else, I'm always sorry for all of you guys waiting on the work. I feel like I'm always falling short as an author. I don't know how much longer it will take, but I'll rest well, and I will come back when I'm ready and the time is right. ​

​​As the fall cools, keep yourselves healthy, and I hope you guys have good weeks coming. I hope this word can give you guys a peace of mind in waiting for my return. I will try to spend the week with a peace of mind as well.

​I always hope that you, my readers, are happy.

When we know when I'm coming back or if there's some other good news, I'll be sure to post another notice.

​Thank you.​

ps. Please do not repost this post in other places.

[Compiler’s note: SIU has since deleted the blog, but despite so, I hope readers can understand his struggles without twisting his words or actions.] 

[Originally translated by AdiosCorea here] 

Previous Chapter | Hiatus Post 2

[morlock-holmes]

This anonymous article from the Washingtonian, (Which is apparently... a magazine? Of some sort?) “What Happened After My 13-Year-Old Son Joined the Alt-Right “ was being reblogged on my dash a few times and looking at some of the notes a lot of people were calling it propaganda without saying which side they thought it was propaganda for.

I think a LOT of people were so swayed by the “One Concerned Mom Speaks Out!” tone of the thing that they kind of missed the actual narrative.

I mean... If anything it’s kind of propaganda in favor of the alt-right, isn’t it?

Here’s how the author of the piece sums up the inciting incident in the story:

One morning during first period, a male friend of Sam’s [The author’s son] mentioned a meme whose suggestive name was an inside joke between the two of them. Sam laughed. A girl at the table overheard their private conversation, misconstrued it as a sexual reference, and reported it as sexual harassment. Sam’s guidance counselor pulled him out of his next class and accused him of “breaking the law.” Before long, he was in the office of a male administrator who informed him that the exchange was “illegal,” hinted that the police were coming, and delivered him into the custody of the school’s resource officer. At the administrator’s instruction, that man ushered Sam into an empty room, handed him a blank sheet of paper, and instructed him to write a “statement of guilt.”

No one called me as this unfolded, even though Sam cried for about six hours straight as staff members parked him in vacant offices to keep him away from other students. When he stepped off the bus that afternoon and I asked why his eyes were so swollen, he informed me that he would probably be suspended, but possibly also expelled and arrested.

Later there’s more, but basically the school authorities double down, Sam’s parents decided that if the authorities were that cruel and insane Sam needed to be in another school, and so they transferred him. Sam then starts getting into 4chan and reddit alt-right communities, who explain that what happened to him happened because of feminism gone crazy.

So, as a slight aside I have always thought since I was in high school myself that this kind of zero-tolerance, authoritarian crap is particularly cruel to inflict on growing children. A boy Sam’s age is trying to differentiate himself, see himself as an individual, and the authorities come in and go, “It doesn’t matter what you think, it doesn’t matter why you did what you did, we will never care about that, we see you as a type and there is nothing you can do to convince us otherwise.”

This message would be incredibly dispiriting to anybody, but particularly to children.

Contrast, meanwhile, his experience on Reddit:

Soon Sam stopped trying to convince me to join his brave new world. He was so active on his favorite subreddit that the other group leaders, unaware that he was 13, appointed him a moderator. Among his new online besties, this was a huge honor and a boost to his cratered self-esteem. He loved Reddit and its unceasing conversations about the nuances of memes—he seemed in love with the whole enterprise, as if it were an adolescent crush. 

...

Eventually, Sam had to give up moderating for the most practical of reasons: Eighth grade ended and he was packing for sleep-away camp. He would be offline for a month and would need other mods to cover for him. To ask for help, he had to out himself as a kid.

Sam and I both laughed about the absurdity of the situation, though he admitted he was nervous he’d be exiled from moderating. I asked him to read me the responses to his message. They were all of the “Dude, you’ve got to be kidding me” variety—one of their most sophisticated and reliable colleagues was a middle-schooler heading off to Jewish summer camp!

Later, it was my turn to be surprised: They all contributed to a going-away gift for Sam and mailed an emoji-themed fidget-spinner to his bunk address.

Faced with new information that Sam has broken the rules, his school imediately brands him a predator, threatens to arrest and expel him, and responds with undisguised hate.

Faced with new information about who Sam is, his alt-right buddies are shocked, but then reiterate that they still care about him and value the contributions he has made to their community, and get together to express that to Sam.

I’d like to make a little list of what Sam gets from the alt-right in the narrative:

A group of people who have shown that they will support and value him, even if they find out new things about him.

People who listen and care about what he has to say

An explanation of what, exactly, happened to him and why.

Ideas about how he can protect himself and others from having that happen again in the future.

Allies and support for enacting those ideas.

His parents, by his Mother’s own admission in the article, were only able to provide fumbling efforts to provide protection from that particular school’s administration. His parents and their politics were totally ready to say that taking all that stuff about cucks seriously was pretty weird and dumb, his mother is totally ready to counter any statistics his alt-right buddies might have, but is completely and utterly unequipped to provide any of the other stuff I listed up there. There’s a moment where Sam explains to her what he and his friends think happened:

Sam pledged fealty to the idea of men’s rights because, as he said, his former administrator had privileged girls’ words and experiences over boys’, and that’s how all of his troubles had started in the first place. I’d never in my life backed the “masculinist” cause or imagined that men needed protecting—yet I couldn’t help but agree with Sam’s analysis.

The mother’s politics didn’t actually equip her with an alternate explanation of what happened; rather, she has to concede that his explanation makes sense, and having conceded that has no idea what to do with herself.

In fact, as the article ends she is only vaguely starting to come to grips with the fact that Sam needed the kinds of support I listed above:

“All I wanted was for people to take me seriously,” [Sam] repeated matter-of-factly. “They treated me like a rational human being, and they never laughed at me. I saw the way you and Dad looked at each other and tried not to smile when I said something. I could hear you both in your room at night, laughing at me.”

I struggled for a moment because I wanted to tell him that wasn’t true. But I couldn’t deny his accusation. Behind closed doors, when my husband and I thought our children were asleep, we had often vented to each other about Sam’s off-the-wall proclamations and the bizarre situation we found ourselves in.

So I told Sam simply that I was sorry for making him feel bad.

I still think about his words a lot, especially when alt-right figures headline the news. But mostly, I wonder how I could have tried so hard to parent Sam through this crisis and yet tripped up on something as basic as not making my own kid feel small.

By the end of the article Sam is disenchanted with the Alt-right through, well, it’s not totally clear. The author of the article, by the end, seems to understand that Sam needed at least some of the things I outlined up there, but it’s not clear to me if she views the fact that her own politics were completely unable to provide them as an actual problem.

In fact, it’s not clear to me what she believes her politics are actually for. I know, I know, it’s not a philosophical article, but the question of “How much power do public school administrators have over their charges and what can parents do to counter them” is a nakedly, inarguably political question; after all, it’s about how a state-run institution should be run. And rather then turning to her own left-wing beliefs to contextualize and fight this decision, her solution is that her family has enough money to put Sam in another school.

Now, I’m not criticizing this decision, I think it was probably difficult, even brave. But it’s noticeable that her left-wing, non-culty politics don’t seem to have much to offer the next Sam, a Sam whose parents might not have private school tuition sitting around in their bank accounts. 

In fact, she seems to regard the fact that Sam’s alt-right buddies were able to offer up compelling narratives and give him hope of implementing a solution and reasserting his self-worth as, well, cheating. Isn’t that cult-like behavior? Politics aren’t actually supposed to help the Sams of the world contextualize the things that happen in their lives, and when they do, it’s awfully sinister.

This seems to be part of something that has heavily infected the American left. It’s a kind of unspoken philosophy that says, “Politics is for solving major problems, the rest should be handled elsewhere.”

Even when a question overtly connected to Mom’s politics crops up in their life, her politics have literally nothing practical to offer any of them. Her left-wing politics are correct it doesn’t matter if they’re helpful.

This is what I keep trying to get at when I say people are missing the point with Jordan Peterson. Yeah, a lot of what he says sounds factually rickety to me as well, but, well, when I spend every day wondering why I can’t seem to get my life together, simultaneously dreading it AND feeling like there’s no point in trying to change, how does having a more correct view of lobster biology help me out with that?

I mean, I’m not saying it can’t, I’m saying people won’t even connect the two. Look at the reviews of 12 rules and people will usually grudgingly admit that his self-help advice might be useful, but really, it will tend to rile up exactly the wrong kind of person, and anyway, what does any of this have to do with politics?

This is what I keep trying to get at about effective altruism, as well. It’s not that it’s wrong, it’s that by its very nature it will never be about providing me, personally, with any help, because it’s focused on stopping rogue AIs and mailing out malaria nets, fine causes but notice that, while Rationalists see “How can I stop a super-intelligent AI from destroying us” as a solvable problem “How do I make the kind of friends who will spontaneously check on me if I sound like I’m sick?” is completely insolvable.

To the extent that my existing faculties haven’t already made it happen, unfortunately there are no clarifying frameworks or advice better than, “Well, it’s hard.”

Rationalists are better about this than generic leftists but I also feel like that’s a low bar. Answers to the question “What can I do to concretely improve my life, and, for that matter, why should I even bother, what’s the point?” are becoming ever more disconnected from left-wing thought, and most of the concrete attempts to answer these questions are coming from the right.

I actually don’t think this is good, incidentally.

[relationshipsandpolitics]

On My Privilege

People don’t really understand what being “privileged” really means.  From a certain perspective, you might think it’s a buzz word meant to de-legitimize any success you’ve ever had.  From a different point of view, it might mean that your race and gender prevent you from attaining success.  Both are oversimplifications of the word, though the latter perspective is way closer to the truth.  The thing about us white guys is we have a hard time holding up a mirror to ourselves. We fear being told that maybe we aren’t as awesome as everyone in our lives tells us.  Accepting our privilege is admitting we aren’t special, that we aren’t worthy of the material things we have.  

But how does privilege manifest itself when you’re not an obvious embodiment of it?  On the surface, I might not feel so privileged. I don’t have a million dollar a year job because of who my father was.  I’m not Draco Malfoy.  But if I think about how I got to the point I’m at, modest as it be, I must rectify with the fact that I was privileged in many ways.  Let me demonstrate typical white middle class privilege.

My parents were state workers who were doing well enough by the time I was in high school to afford nice trips around the world.  We didn’t take those trips and instead they dragged me antiquing in Maine with them, but technically we had the means.  I went to a good public school from elementary through high school where the teachers cared and there were enough extra-curricular activities to keep me engaged. They even had programs that allowed working parents to drop off and pick up their kids after school hours. My parents showed an interest in my education and could afford to get me a tutor for chemistry, which was a waste of money because I was never understanding chemistry.   If I didn’t do my homework, there were consequences because my parents had jobs that allowed them time to be around enough to care.

Those good jobs allowed them to pay for me to attend a great state university.  Without needing to worry about working while attending school, I was able to focus on my studies and develop some decent friendships.  

During my junior year I was able to get an internship because my mom knew someone who heard they were looking for interns for some Congressman. The internship was easy (I barely did anything substantial), but now I had some actual work experience on my resume.  I also was a camp counselor for two summers, which gave me enough money for beer and weed. I lived rent free with my parents during breaks from college.

When I graduated and couldn’t find a job in politics, I stayed with my parents and waited tables. I had no experience in the restaurant industry when I applied, but I was a decent-looking white kid where the customers were almost all white. They hired me that day and I made good money at an easy job.  Most of the black employees worked in the back of the house.  At the time, I never questioned it.  

Eventually I met my now-wife, who lived thirty minutes away in the city.  I regularly gave up lucrative shifts to see her on the weekends because I didn’t have any bills.  I used my tip money to pay the tolls, take her out to dinner occasionally, and overall be a good boyfriend.   Eventually I landed a low-paying job with a politician in the city. I got that job because I had just the right amount of education and experience for the position.  That do-nothing internship I got because my mom knew someone came in handy.

I commuted in for free with my parents, sleeping in the car while they drove.  Eventually, because I had virtually no bills, I was able to afford an apartment in the city that was luckily vastly below market rate.  Thanks rent control!

I worked hard and was good at my job, but I wasn’t some type A go getter. I just got lucky that my position allowed me to grow and develop new skills.  Eventually, though, we left and moved across the country for an opportunity with my wife.  Because we had some good savings, due in part because our families helped a lot with the wedding and we got more back in gifts, I had the luxury of being unemployed for several months before finding a job that paid quite well.  At this job I didn’t feel like I worked hard, but I had developed enough connections through my previous experiences to have some success.  In fact, my biggest achievement is largely due to knowing a Senator from our days at the Congressman’s office.

That brings me to the right now.  My wife and I both have good salaries and can afford to invest in ourselves to further increase our value and overall enjoyment of life.  When we have kids, we’ll be able to afford day care or for one of us to quit.  They’ll grow up going to good public schools, getting into good colleges, and getting good jobs.  If they want to go into acting or become a musician, we’ll probably financially support them as best we can.

This is all thanks to my privilege and the privilege of my parents.   My privilege wasn’t solely the result of my race, gender or economic status, but of all three, plus a good helping of luck. If my parents were poorer, I would have been in a crappier school system with less resources to help me succeed.  I would’ve needed a job much earlier and that would’ve cut into my time at school.  I would have to take student loans to pay for college, and perhaps I wouldn’t have been able to afford the low salary at the politician’s office.  I may have never been able to meet my wife, let alone give up weekend shifts and still afford the bridge tolls to see her.  My privilege is why we are married today.  

Of course, others are more privileged than me.  The rich trust fund kid probably got to spend less effort to go to a better university and land a nicer position out of college.  The big movie star had famous parents that opened doors for them, and now has so much free time and money to vacation in Monaco.

But this all misses the point.  There will always be structural unfairness built into our systems that benefit people of certain demographics over others. And those structural biases generally hurt minorities, women and other historically-oppressed groups more than white men.  Having privilege means having a wider margin of error for life.   If I got fired for coming in late to the restaurant, I still had a roof over my head and food in my belly.  A poor person doesn’t have that margin for error.  They can still achieve the same success as me, but they can’t make nearly as many mistakes as I could.

What aggrieved white people don’t understand is they are not being asked to give it all back or shout from the rooftops that they don’t deserve any of their success.  As someone who benefited from privilege his whole life, it’s not about giving all my money away or publicly flagellating myself for having it easier.  It’s about acknowledging my advantages and working to make things easier for others. It’s about supporting policies that level the playing field as much as possible. I never had to worry about having a place to go after school, so I support funding those types of programs in places where students do have that challenge.  I never had to worry about making rent while juggling student loans, so I advocate for increased affordable housing and free college.

Recognizing your own privilege is about having empathy for others. Our successes and failures are both our own and society’s.  We don’t need to go back and change our pasts, but we need to be better at changing other people’s futures.

[mikauzoran]

Adrienette Drabble Fifteen: Judge

Gabriel snapped something about sartorial trends in Italian that Adrien didn’t quite understand. He had heard his father rant heatedly about fashion in Italian often enough to the point where Adrien himself was able to thoroughly insult designers, models, lighting specialists, the sound people, the critics reviewing a show, and the owner of the venue, but the comment Gabriel had just made was more subtle; thus, it went completely over Adrien’s head.

“Maybe I should learn how to say something useful in Italian like, ‘Where is the train station?’ or ‘Does this have meat in it?’,” Adrien thought as he watched the Seine fly by outside the car window.

Gabriel put his line back on mute and sighed, “This call is a waste of time. The idiot has no conception of the direction current trends are pointing for next season. Why, just the other day, I was speaking with a few of our new interns, and Ma—aa…”

Gabriel stopped dead, slowly turning to scrutinize the damage he had done.

Adrien smiled sadly. “Go on. What did Marinette say?”

Gabriel gulped. “…Neoclassicism is making another comeback. And she’s absolutely right.”

Gabriel cleared his throat. “I’m sorry. Are you okay? Are you going to be okay going to school today? Are you going to be okay seeing her? Am I pushing you too hard? We don’t have to do this.”

Adrien chewed on his lip thoughtfully. “I don’t know. There’s only one period left today, so…I’m sure I can tough it out for one period. As for Marinette…”

He covered his face with his hands. “God, I want to see her. I want to see her more than anything. Is that masochistic?”

Plagg sighed, poking his head out of Adrien’s shirt collar. “A little bit, Kid.”

Adrien blew out a long sigh, his hand trailing down his face to rub at his neck.

“I’m pathetic, aren’t I?” Adrien mumbled.

“Not pathetic,” Gabriel assured. “Just pitiable.”

“I can live with ‘pitiable’,” Adrien decided, distractedly tracing the bruises with a finger.

Gabriel’s lips pressed together in a thin line. “It won’t be like this for much longer. Things are going to get better.”

“I hope so,” Adrien mumbled, leaning his head to rest against the windowpane.

“Did Nathalie tell you we were able to schedule you to see a counselor at six this evening?” Gabriel inquired.

Adrien’s head whipped around, and he stared incredulously at his father. “What? Really? So soon? I thought we’d have to sit around on a waiting list for a few months or something.”

Gabriel shook his head gravely. “We didn’t really have time to be waitlisted. Measures might have been taken to circumvent the waiting list.”

Adrien’s expression slowly morphed into a frown. “What did you do? Do I want to know?”

“Let’s just say,” Gabriel sighed. “They’ll soon begin construction on the Emilie Agreste Memorial Mental Health Wing thanks to our generous donation.”

Adrien pursed his lips. “Part of me feels bad for cutting in line, but there’s also a part of me that reasons that they’ll be able to help more people with a new, updated wing.”

Gabriel shrugged. “I’m not concerned with being a good person. I’m concerned with being your father.”

“Mother would be pleased to have something named after her.” Adrien smiled nostalgically and began to giggle. “She would probably make some snide remark about giving her name to a psych ward.”

Gabriel began to laugh even as his heart throbbed. “Yes, she would, wouldn’t she? Emilie always had something snarky and irreverent to say.”

“…Dad?”

“Hm?” Gabriel was still getting used to the new moniker.

Adrien smiled with green eyes full of gratitude. “Thank you so much. You’ve been so great the past two and a half weeks, and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it. I’d be absolutely lost right now without your support…. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you when you said things were going to change.”

Gabriel reached out to run a hand through Adrien’s hair. “I’d given you no reason to believe me.”

“Thank you for today,” Adrien whispered. “I know you think psychologists are quacks, so it means a lot to me that you’ve gone to so much trouble.”

“I am willing to do anything you think we need to do to get you better, Adrien, regardless of my personal beliefs. At this point, I hope that I’ve been wrong this whole time and she’s actually able to help you,” Gabriel confessed.

Adrien nodded. “Yeah. Me too…but still. Thank you, Dad.”

Gabriel shrugged. “All I did was throw money at the problem like usual. This was a team effort. Nathalie spent all day finding a doctor and making the phone calls, and Plagg covered Nathalie’s desk while she was doing that, so…”

Adrien awkwardly tried to look down his shirt at the kwami. “Really, Plagg?”

Plagg floated out to shrug, landing on Gabriel’s shoulder. “I mean, you were out cold, so it’s not like you needed strict supervision. It wasn’t so hard to answer the phone and play around on the computer between poking my head in to check on you.” Plagg cleared his throat and recited, “‘Gabriel Enterprises. You’ve reached the desk of Nathalie Sancoeur. This is her assistant Plagg. How may I help you?’ And then you just have to tell them what day you need what where. Nathalie made me a cheat sheet. It wasn’t too hard since Nathalie has everything so organized.”

“Wow, Plagg,” Adrien snickered. “I didn’t think you had it in you to be useful.”

“I surprised myself,” Plagg admitted.

“He’s actually a very skilled resource manager,” Gabriel praised. “He reworked our invoice system.”

Adrien’s eyes widened in surprise.

Plagg shrugged. “I had a kitten who was an accountant for a law firm back in the late eighteen-hundreds. The principles are the same. I just had to learn how to work the computer, but I’ve seen you do that plenty of times, Kid.”

Adrien nodded dumbly as they pulled up to the school and the car stopped.

Gabriel looked at the building and then at Adrien with a dubious expression. “You’re sure you’re okay to do this?”

Adrien shrugged. “I’m at least going to try. I’ve got this. I mean, I get pummeled by akuma thrice a week, so how bad can this be?”

Gabriel winced, thinking, “Not anymore, you don’t.”

Gabriel leaned in to press a kiss to Adrien’s forehead. “Have a good day…. I’m proud of you.”

With a genuine smile, Adrien stepped out of the car and made his way into the school.

He snuck into Madame Mendeleiev’s Calculus class through the back door, hoping to escape notice by sitting at the back of the room, but Mendeleiev herself foiled his plan.

“Monsieur Agreste, so nice of you to join us,” she remarked sarcastically.

Nearly the whole class turned to stare at him.

“I’m sorry I’m late, Madame,” Adrien replied, head down, refusing to look at anyone so as not to witness their reactions to seeing him.

Apparently, the akumatization sensitivity training the teachers had to take had not made an impression on Madame Mendeleiev.

Adrien could feel his cheeks burning as he buried his eyes in the textbook and tried not to fuss with the scarf covering up the marks on his neck.

His classmates started whispering, and as much as Adrien actively tried not to hear, Chat Noir’s heightened senses affected him residually even outside of the mask.

“Wow. He looks like crap.” Juleka.

“Did you see the pictures online of him crying at the park Saturday?” Max.

“Look at that scarf. No points for guessing what that’s covering up.” Alix.

“Someone saw some action. Maybe he was so bad she broke up with him.” Kim.

“Serves him right for the way he’s been treating Marinette.” Mylène.

“Has your brother said anything yet?” Rose.

“How is he? How does he look? Does he look okay?” Marinette. Marinette obviously unable to look at him herself and asking Alya to do reconnaissance.

Adrien heard Alya draw in a sharp breath. “He’s…fine,” Alya lied.

Marinette sighed. He could almost see her rolling her eyes. “Alya?”

Alya blew out a weary breath. “Honestly? I think you wrecked him. If anyone was ever being held together by rubber bands, it would be him.”

“Oh,” Marinette replied in a barely-there whisper. “G-Great. Thanks.”

God, he hoped she didn’t look at him. He hadn’t thought he’d looked that bad, but, apparently, the situation was dire, and he didn’t want her to see him like that.

Tomorrow he’d put on more makeup. He would smile so hard and look everyone in the eye and stand up straight and be the Adrien Agreste that everyone saw on billboards. Tomorrow he would fake it so well that no one would suspect a thing.

But in that moment, he felt like a wounded seal watching the sharks circling round. He was not the Adrien Agreste on the perfume bottle. He was just that dorky loser Adrien whose life was currently rimming the drain.

He sank lower in his seat, hunching his shoulders to hide his face. He kept his head down until Madame Mendeleiev called for order and resumed the lesson.

He considered sneaking back out of class and heading to the nurse’s office until all the other students had left for the day. He’d been wrong. Battling akuma might be physically challenging and painful, but that was nothing compared to the mental anguish of sitting in that classroom, feeling like a freak show and having everyone whisper about him.

“Don’t stop breathing on me, Kid,” Plagg whispered. “Come on. In and out.”

Adrien took a shallow inhale. It was all his lungs could handle.

“Hey. No hyperventilating,” Plagg chided, concern softening his voice. “Kid, this was a bad idea. Let’s go home,” he suggested.

But Adrien couldn’t move. He was too afraid to get up and leave, knowing it would draw even more attention to himself. He was afraid to run away and show them how scared he was of them and what they would think and what they would whisper behind his back. He was too terrified to move, to flee and let them know they had beaten him.

He was afraid of what Marinette would think. He had to convince her he was emotionally stable. He had to prove that he was the kind of guy that she would want to get involved with. Running out of class crying would not accomplish those goals, so Adrien stayed and focused on not letting anyone see what a disaster he was.

After a few minutes, he tentatively peeked up at Marinette. Or, at least, the back of her head. Her hair was up in a bun, and she was wearing a black lace choker she had made out of some of the fabric scraps he had once given her.

Adrien lightly touched the bruises she’d left on his neck and thought that it was nice that she had a gift from him around her neck too.

 The bell had barely rung when Adrien bolted from his seat, hoping to get to his locker and get out before anyone could look at him or say anything.

His plan failed. 

He couldn’t remember his locker combination. The information was just gone. He tried several strings of numbers that seemed to have some potential, but none of them worked. It could have been the fact that his hands were shaking so badly, he wasn’t certain he’d entered the numbers he was intending to in the first place.

“Breathe, Kid,” Plagg reminded, phasing down Adrien’s arm and through the locker to pop the door open.

“Thank you,” Adrien mumbled meekly, feeling the edge come off his panic.

Until someone yanked his scarf off from behind.

“Hey, Agreste.”

Adrien spun to find Kim looming over him with a predatory smirk. “Wow! It looks like someone really mauled you. What happened?”

“Kim, could you please give me my scarf back?” Adrien reached for it, but Kim pulled it away, balling it up and holding it over Adrien’s head.

Adrien was five-nine in shoes while Kim had reached six foot three, and those few inches made all the difference.

“Make me,” Kim snickered.

Adrien stood on his tiptoes to no avail. “Please, Kim?”

“Nope,” Kim rejected the request gleefully. “You know, I don’t know what Marie ever saw in you. She’s so over you, by the way,” Kim added savagely.

“W-What?” Adrien blinked stupidly, hands dropping to his sides. “Marinette…is…?”

Kim shoved Adrien back into his locker door.

Adrien caught himself on one of the shelves inside the open locker and looked up wide-eyed at Kim as the other boy growled, “You bastard! Marie! Marie, that girl that you dated. Marie who was head over heels in love with you, you self-absorbed prick! You should be shot,” Kim spat, looking down at Adrien in disgust. “Guys like you should be taken out back and shot. I hope whoever gave you that hickey makes you suffer. I hope she toys with your heart like you did Marie’s.”

Adrien didn’t even have the presence of mind to flinch when Kim drew back his foot to kick Adrien.

Thankfully, the blow never landed.

“Back the hell off, Kim,” Marinette snapped, charging Kim like a rhino and shoving him away from Adrien while Kim was off balance.

“The hell, Marinette?!” Kim snapped.

Marinette stomped her foot, putting herself between Kim and Adrien. “You heard me: Back off,” she repeated, an eerie calm in her voice that spoke of someone who was master of the situation. “You mess with him, you deal with me.”

Kim shifted uncomfortably under Marinette’s intense glare. Upon brief consideration, Kim put his hands up, unwilling to go up against Marinette. He tossed the scarf at Adrien’s feet as he walked away, muttering under his breath.

The rest of the locker room went back about its business once the show had ended, but Marinette and Adrien remained motionless. He stared as she took a deep breath and forced her muscles, her jaw, her fists to unclench.

She didn’t turn to face him, and he was glad of it because he was positive that he looked pathetic. That he was pathetic. And she was just so cool and brave and wonderful.

Had she hurt him? Yes. Would he let her hurt him again? Gladly. Over and over and over if only that pain could be interspersed with happiness like she had made him feel when she’d smiled at him, called him Chaton, returned one of his puns with a pun of her own, kissed him…

She had told him not to speak to her. He wondered how strictly she’d enforce that rule.

“Thank you,” he ventured in a small, timid voice.

She visibly deflated.

He almost apologized, but she spoke first, “I will always have your back. No matter what.”

Without another word or a glance behind, she walked away.

But her words, that simple promise, meant the world to him. He shut the locker door and fled before anything else could happen to kill the hope inside of him.

[krystalfowler-blog]

Why Won't You Help Us?

Last year my children and I went to counselors and and agency we thought helped people looking for answers, help, encouragement, someone, anyone to listen to us and help. We need help. I need help. My girls need help. My girls trusted all of you to help and protect them. We trusted you to help, protect, and put us and our family back together after such tragedy.

So 1 year later shouldn't we be making some kind of progress?? Some kind of healing?? Moving towards being okay??

Where we actually are a year later...

My entire family has and remains torn completely apart. Every one of us are completely alone. Alexis, 8, is in Jackson. Tabitha,11, is in Pontotoc. Trinity, 13, was to be released from Pontotoc but haven't gotten an update, as I rarely ever do. I am living in this empty house filled with nothing but memories from the last 6 years. Aside from this house we once called home I have lost literally everything short of my life and that isn't looking to good lately. I have not been allowed to see or speak to my children since the beginning of December. No one in the family has. I can't imagine how confused, scared, and angry they must be. It is literally killing me. Among the very few updates I have gotten I was told Tabitha has recently disclosed that she is hearing voices. A year later, instead of healing, my precious 11 year old baby girl has been taken and kept from her entire family, sent away to 5 different facilities, abused by foster families, made to squat and cough, and now is hearing voices!

Alexis, my youngest daughter, she is 8 and in Canopy at Jackson. After every single family member has been stripped from her life completely, in January the agency suddenly felt it was necessary to take her father from her. (Her mother was taken in December) Regardless of what Alexis and her father's DNA test shows (this test was administered a year ago so keep in my it wasn't new information to the agency) William Holley is, has been, and always will be her father! I understand you wanting to find the man who would match the DNA test, but despite my efforts to try and make him be a part of her life he disappeared when she was 1. William is the only father she has ever had or known. She loves her father more than anyone in the world. And since I was a daddy's girl my whole life also I can only try to imagine the pain and anger she feels right now. I don't understand why you have to take her father from her while searching for this stranger. Why can she not have both???

Then there is the proven fact that a DNA test alone DOES NOT in any way make you a father!! Surely after talking to Tabitha and Matthew you couldn't argue that fact right?

Now, before you even ask what I am doing on my own to heal for myself and my children I will go ahead and tell you. When I realized we needed help in February of 2018 I began with the school counselors. I figured they would know and be able to point us in the right direction or send the right people to us. Then we met several workers from the agency (MDCPS), the Saltillo police department, counselors, etc. The agency didn't seem to be of much help, they told me to go to the resource center. So I did. I have been in some kind of counseling for a year, I have had to change counselors many times and while desperately needing this therapy for me and my children I have tried to juggle everything my life as a single mother consisted of with very little or no help. I found Miss Pat at Lifecore who got me started in outpatient treatment which is what was required on my service plan. (Keep in mind it is impossible to heal, move forward, or do almost anything really when you are not able to even speak to your children on the phone, but that's something any parent should know) So I get started in this program and begin to find a little hope... About a month into it we have a court date where I thought and hoped the agency would inform the judge of my involvement in the program and the progress I have been so desperately trying to make... I was hopeful since this was the only thing left to complete on my service plan other than turning in some paperwork. I thought surely I will be able to talk to my children which would give me strength to keep moving forward and making progress. That court date was the end of January. Something like the 29th I believe. And it was a nightmare. My caseworker stated that I was making no progress and requested that the plan be changed to adoption. She lied. The hearing was post poned and I was ordered to take a fingernail test, which I did, about a week later I believe. I recently requested that my counselor put me on the waiting list for inpatient because I am literally dying without my children in my life at all and I don't know what else to do and I can't get anyone to answer any of my questions or help me find any kind of help we need.

So here we are April 2019, completely separated, devastated, confused, still waiting to go to court, and still wandering what my results were from the fingernail test...

They only questions I have now I don't even need you to answer. Just read and ask yourself...

-What did you do to help these 3 innocent little girls?

-Has anyone asked them how they are and made them feel comfortable enough to answer truthfully?

-Are you proud of the job you have done with this family? The whole family?

-Could the decisions and the results of those decisions you made in this case give people, families, and especially children any confidence or courage to speak up if they are being abused or need help???

[dearbeautilation]

Common Misconceptions About Therapy

You may have noticed that in a lot of advice messages I get, I recommend talking to a therapist or a counselor, which is something I have done myself for years and have had profoundly positive results from. The thing is, so many people (and quite a few in my own family and friend circle) have misconceptions about therapy that make them assume it’s not even an avenue worth exploring to help with their struggles. Here are a couple common judgements about therapy I’ve come across (or have even had myself) and the actual truths, from my humble lil’ experience at least.

1) Therapy is expensive.

It is true that many amazing therapists are available under most insurance plans, but depending on your coverage you may still have a high deductible rate to pay before your sessions are covered. Here’s what to do if you have insurance:

Ask if you can set up a payment plan, where you pay as much of a co-pay you can manage on each visit. I have personally done this when my insurance did not cover enough to make the visits I needed feasible.

Find therapists in-network through your insurance, where you can know upfront how much you must pay before coverage begins, and cut down your search time by only contacting in-network therapists.

        And if you don’t have health insurance:

COUNSELING!!! Talking to any qualified professional 1-on-1 is the most crucial part of therapy, and you can get this from a counselor at your school or at a clinic. Check out the SAMHSA locator to find someone near you.

This link is super helpful for lots of resources for affordable therapy.

A walk-in clinic you may go to for a cold or flu may also be able to help hook you up with resources, so don’t be afraid to ask. 

2) Therapists tell you how to fix your problems.

Therapists aren’t fairy godparents who listen to your problems and then tell you what to do to magically solve them; their job is to get to understand you well enough so they can guide you to understand the root of your actions, reactions and patterns so you can be more empowered to solve your OWN problems and make peace with the past. This is why ongoing, weekly therapy is most ideal; it is not a quick or easy process to address issues with your mind and your life, and in therapy you must respect that and respect that, just like with anything else in life, it takes time, effort and patience to make progress. 

Life is inherently complicated – to expect therapy to be a quick solve is, excuse the phrasing, crazy. You want to stop the loop of bullshit you’re currently living? Be prepared to work for it, and before that, be prepared to learn why you are *deserving* of the payoff your hard work will undoubtedly give you. 

3) Only “crazy” people need therapy. 

Do you have a brain? Do you think thoughts and feel feelings? Then congrats,  you’re a candidate for therapy! It is an absolutely toxic stereotype that only people suffering from severe issues can benefit from therapy: with this mindset, it tells people who may be on mental health decline to wait until the issue gets out of hand to seek help. This to me is like having a cold, then seeing it turn into a fever, but saying “I’ll wait until I start passing out and pooping blood to go to the doctor”. Your mental health is just as important as your physical health, and the two are much more closely related that you may think.

Therapy is an incredible tool for anyone who is feeling overwhelmed by life in general, finds themselves fixated on negative things that hurt their self-image or relationships, is realizing they keep doing the same bad things over and over again, has just suffered a trauma or loss or accident, or is feeling simply stuck in life. 

4) Therapists just want to blame your parents for all your issues.

While you will probably at some point discuss your family and parental relationships with a therapist because these relationships are super impactful on our development, therapy is not about blaming anyone at the end of the day; it’s about understanding your reality and getting better equipped to deal with it so your quality of life is improved. You may come to conclusions that certain actions certain people have taken have impacted you negatively in some way, but such conclusions are only part of the steps you take towards ultimately having a healthier relationship with your feelings, with others, and with your life.

5) Therapy is always intense, serious, and clinical.

Not gonna lie-- therapy can get intense sometimes, and that’s part of its benefit. I’ve cried countless times while talking about certain things that just cut to the core, but it’s always served as a way to cleanse the hurt I was keeping locked up. What’s more, is that I’ve had so many laughs, breakthroughs, and completely chill, positive, casual sessions where it felt like I was just kicking it with a really smart friend who I trust.

6) Therapy is always in an office with couches and a plant.

No way! While it is quite common to have therapy in a warm, homey office setting, remember that there are many types of therapy in different settings, like:

Equine therapy

Occupational therapy

Group therapy

And more!

You can even reach a therapist from the comfort of your home via groups like: 

BetterHelp 

7Cups 

Ginger.io.

7.) All therapy is the same.

This article does a great job breaking down the main types of therapy. I myself have experience with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (basically talk therapy that focuses on redirecting and guiding my reactions and actions) and Art Therapy, which was integrated to the talk therapy and had me use both sides of my brain at the same time (the creative right and logical left) to work through challenges I brought up.

8) Therapists prescribe/ push you to take psych meds.

Your general practitioner or a psychiatrist are the only doctors who can prescribe mental-health related medication. Your therapist cannot prescribe you medication, but they may recommend you consult someone who can if, after getting to know you better, they believe you may benefit from medication in their professional opinion and from their experience with similar cases.

  9) Therapy is self-indulgent, narcissistic and frivolous.

There is nothing frivolous about taking control of your life and asking for help and guidance. It is a sign of strength to know when there might be a problem, to ask for help, and to accept that help; your problems do not need to be life or death, trauma-based, or crippling to be valid problems that can be helped with talking to a professional. Pain is relevant; it is empathy that allows us to feel for all kinds of problems or struggles we have never experienced ourselves, but it is the plain and simple human experience that causes us to react the way we do to the problems we have based on our own realities. Once you validate your own feelings and stop the comparisons, you stop self-sabotaging assumptions like this one; that’s a lil’ something I learned in therapy. ;)

Gifs via RealityTVGifs

[educationtech]

How to get Admission in Engineering College after 12th - Arya College

A term “college applications” creates fear in the minds of most of the students coming out from the higher school studies. The process of engineering college application is always related to some sort of stress for every student. The more you will know about it, the better you will be able to manage and further increase the chances to achieve your higher educational goals. From the very start to finish, get all the resources and information that will help you to conquer each and every step of the engineering admission process.

The college application process of the Top Engineering College in Jaipur is the most stressful time for the high school career of the students. For this, the main role and responsibility of a counselor are to reduce or remove the stress and help the students to divide their energy into different parts of the process that the professionals can easily control and manage.

Students spend too much time on some of the important factors of the engineering admission process, but they should not. It includes:

1. Writing perfect essay

When we talk about the college application, students stress out like a personal essay. Keep in mind, the essay does not tell the reader everything about you; instead, it is just one part of a whole. It directly brings the task into perspective. Best engineering Colleges in Jaipur place an important role in writing a perfect essay. But it should not be too long. Or in other words, you do not need to tell everything. While creating your essay, you must mention two-three things that the engineering admission committee would not find anywhere else about you. You must illustrate these points in the most engaging way so that it will reflect your personality.

2. Stands out unique

Each and every day, the admission officers read thousands of applications. So, there are fewer chances of your applications to be on the top or seen easily. But, do not spoil your opportunity for the sake of being different from others. You must explain everything to the officer including why you debate, and how it makes you feel. Your individual initiative and efforts by explaining the depth of involvement will make you stand unique from every applicant.

3. Craft a strong and crisp resume

In order to stand out from the crowd, students usually ask whether they need to mention some major accomplishments. The engineering colleges in Jaipur usually look for talented students. If you have a lead role in the school play, there are more chances of getting selected in the college admission interviews. Therefore, it is equally important to show your interest in extra-curricular activities.

Keeping this in mind, make your resume clear and simple by demonstrating each and everything about you. Your resume should also show that you can make the college community exciting and amazing because college is more than what you think. You must be genuinely committed to what you have written in your resume.

4. Get into a prestigious school for more success

Most of the information and sources says that you need to get the Best BTech College to make your career. But it is equally and essentially important to get into the best school to get admission in the best college for your successful career.

Motivated people always succeed, but the fundamentals and support of their success come from what they learn and the people who helped them to make them learn. Most of the people think that they get the best of their inspiration and motivation from the college along with the academics. It happens in some cases only.

If you cannot be able to visit the campus, it is important to do your research. You can take the virtual tours from the college websites; get the knowledge of the BTech course catalog. You can get the answer to the questions from the students who are already studying there.

Application timeline

The admissions process of top engineering colleges starts once the first application gets submitted. It might seem early to you, but you should start thinking about your college and the required engineering branch along with the entire graduation days. Before sending your applications, it is important to review and ensure each and every college-related to your college.

1. Freshman year

During this time, it is important to strategize your high school performances and offerings aside from taking classes that interest you. You should use your freshman year to plan out your classes and extra-curricular activities. It will help you to succeed both personally and academically for the next four years. For this, you can consider the following steps:

a. You can consult with a guidance counselor to support your engineering college in India goals for your four-year plan.

b. Start looking for challenging courses that help you to grow academically.

c. Explore more and more college websites to understand your choices of study and the college you wish to attend.

2. Sophomore Year

This year would help you to start building relationships with coaches and teachers. Establishing relationships in high school helps you to answer their college questions. It will also ensure that these individuals will talk about your abilities, skills, and growth and recommend you for the best place when the time comes. For this, follow the given steps:

a. You can prepare a list of questions for your teachers about the college. Also, you can discuss the potential college options with them.

b. Become a well-rounded student by participating in extra-curricular activities.

c. If you have struggled in your first year, seek out tutoring to improve your skills

3. Junior year

During this year, you must sharpen your extra-curricular activities. The admission officers have a keen interest in the involvement of students in projects or programs outside the class. During this year, you have to ask yourself about the important activities that really matter to you. Never spend all your time in participating to look good on papers. Also, you have to give your time to research different colleges and find out your next college stages. You must follow the given steps for this.

a. Never participate in extra-curricular that you have less interest in.

b. Start attending college fairs and meets with school representatives.

c. Visit engineering college India campuses to start finding where to apply.

4. Senior Year

The senior year of your college is based on preparing and applying for the best engineering college in India. In addition, high school seniors must keep the momentum that goes through the end of the academic year. It includes collecting college application materials, securing scholarships and grants, completing and submitting applications, etc. For this, you must ask for letters of recommendation, finalize your financial aid plan, etc.