#ftm thoughts

[savroon]

being young and transgender and in love is the deepest connection next to our bodies and the earth i believe

`both of you know that you are going to change on the outside . know that in ten years time there will be a completely different body and face and smell and eyes . but we are still drawn to each other regardless , no bound or gender or limit that can hold them back .

i sometimes wonder what it is that makes my love so unconditional . love doesn't have a look, but it is somehow in the corner of her mouth when she smiles . the way she holds me is not limited to any chromosome or genital . maybe i am tied to her soul and no, i dont want to have it any other way .

[pickle-the-lad]

I'm plotting!!

Next week: I'm going to start saving up for a name change!! I'm going to have to pick one of my middle names to go with, so I'm most likely going to be Dylan Edward Cougill.

And then I'm going to be spending 4 YEARS after that saving up for top surgery! I don't know the exact amount. All I know is that the surgery alone is going to be up to 6500, and my weekly allowance is $20 plus $2 every time I do a load of dishes. On average, I do two loads a day. So about $34 a week.

I highly doubt I'm going to get any financial aid, despite trying to get on disability for the past 2 years, and I don't feel like I meet the criteria for most charities. So this is my only shot to getting these things off my chest. The price will probably change but I got to try...

[sweetestberryofthebunch]

I realised that I log on here a lot to grief the girl I once was.

[thehumantrap]

I miss being a girl. Not in "I wanna detransition" but in I miss the hugs, I miss the playful friendships, I miss the honest words, I miss the putting their head on my shoulder, I miss the way my friend scratched my head at lunch break, I miss feeling like I belong to a group of sweet people.

Maybe it was just different because we were at school and I actually had a kind of friend group but I feel like as a guy, nobody is as touchy with me anymore and I feel like people see me differently now - which of course they should but man I'm just a soft boy in need of hugs and head scratches and cuddles.

[foxssleeplessness]

if God made me in His image, am i not unlike his fallen angels for going against Him and making me into my own?

[cliplick]

i just wanna be hyperfem in the masc way

[thecamuscut]

dysphoria sucks it is the estrangement of being at odds with my physical self, of knowing that what i feel should be true is rejected by the skin that encases me. the struggle between the self and body mirrors the tension between my longing for clarity and the universe’s indifference.

[timperleyworldofwater]

hey does anyone remember that cbbc series called my life which was about kids from all different backgrounds/experiences talking about how they live day to day. i loved it because i learned a lot watching it and it was made with so much care and compassion!! anyway the one that REALLY made an impact on me was the one about a gnc girl who went out and spoke to different girls of all ages + expressions to work out the all absolving question of: what is a girl? and it really stuck with me!! i was kinda smartass when i first watched it because i was like 11 and thought "hah, well, you're a girl because of your bits" but that was not the question being asked!! some real actual gender studies shit was being done on my publicly funded children's broadcasting channel!!

the long and short of it was that girlhood is kinda a State Of Mind and you can do basically anything as a girl which was of great comfort to me, a girl who was not 100% sure if she was even a girl. i don't think there was much room in the episode to explore transmasculinity specifically so i understand why that wasn't talked about, but i do wonder how it would have concluded if it did. and additionally. what conclusion would i have come to?

[shpiders]

”boys will be boys” yeah boys will be pinned down and fucked while being told what a fucking slut they are for wanting this

[kaionyx]

Why is cockwarming only talked about in the sense that you do it before sex and not after too like it’s not the best way to break a puppy into the perfect cocksleeve?

Finally settling down after rounds of different scenes just to pin them under my weight and hold them like a stuffed animal on my cock, letting them whine and squirm at the fullness in their belly from holding all of the constant loads i’ve rutted back inside until they stop and just accept it. Forcing them feel dazed and bred while going in and out of consciousness to a mixture of soft kisses and sweet words, like how I can’t leave yet because they just feel so good around me and what a precious fuckmutt they’ve been for my cock.

How could their poor mind not rewire itself into thinking how grateful they are to be constantly broken and fixed by someone like me by the time i’m done hmm?

[transassdemon]

[My art, don't steal, tag if reposting]

[chaoticpuppie]

Cockwarming >>>

Having it resting in your mouth while they’re busy doing important work on their desk!

Sitting on tbeir lap at lunch time and just having it resting in you, feeling it twitch now n then >_<

Having it in you while they’re gaming! Thrusting up just a little when they get excited about a win leaving your mouth hanging open hhh!

[the-sweet-abyss]

can we both get high and make out sloppily against a wall? it's hot and messy and clumsy but that doesn't matter, we're all giggly and way too handsy anyway and it doesn't even take long for one of us to start grinding on the other, sooo desperate for stimulation because our cloudy brains only function on pure fucking lust

[war-forged-storms]

As a kinky autistic person, I love getting to unmask during sex oh my god.

Like getting to just smile and not care what my face is doing while going down on someone or something, getting to make whatever noises I want even if they aren’t overly attractive just because I’m enjoying myself and I want to show it. I love just asking flat out what they want me to do and seeing how they get flustered and stutter out an answer. I love the feeling of satisfaction in a task when I get them to finish. I love saying exactly how I’m feeling and how I feel about them and how much I’m enjoying myself no matter what I sound like while saying it.

Like this is the most vulnerable thing I could think to do with you, of course I’m gonna be my true self

[prince-ashitaka]

Lets create a house where yelling means we’re having fun. When you hear a door slam you know it was accidentally pulled with too much strength, not slammed out of anger. When there is silence, it is Contentment, not another passive aggressive fight. The dog is no longer barking to protect, he simply just wants the cats to play with him. Let’s create a safe, warm environment that makes you feel like you can breathe, not hold your breath. Let’s stomp on the eggshells we use to tip toe on. Together we will make this house into a home. And welcome all with open arms into this kind and loving space.

[nekhcore]

HEY YOU!

Yeah, you! Are you trans? Do you like reading books? Or watching movies?

Do you like media about trans men/transmasculine characters but don't know where to find it?

That's sooo crazy because I have this little spreadsheet I'm working on where I'm trying to document all media with protagonists/major characters who are FTM or transmasculine.

The spreadsheet currently has 300+ entries spread across the following categories:

Books

Manga

Memoirs and non-fiction

Movies

TV Shows

Graphic novels / Comics

Webcomics

Audio dramas

Books and movies are also sorted by:

Which character is trans (MC, love interest, antagonist, etc)

If the trans character is POC

The trans character's sexuality (Because I saw lots of transhet guys sad about only being able to find gay romances)

If the author/actor is also trans (if we know for sure)

It's free to use, and free to add to as well! Editing permissions are on, and I check on the spreadsheet every now and then to make sure everything is in order and to clean up.

If you know something that isn't on the list, please add it! You don't have to fill in every single column, but fill it to the best of your abilities.

If you don't want to use the big ass long link below, you can also use: bit.ly/FTM-protags

I made this because I want it to be a community resource. So even if you're not a trans guy or transmasculine person, please reblog!