#funny text post

[doverstar]

shoutout to Disney's Wish (2023) for completely spitting on the idea that wives help their husbands. like even if the pointy queen couldn't convince Chris Pine to turn good, you could have at least given us the evil power couple in the concept art

[katnissandpeetamellark]

[kittyp333]

[j-nightingalesb1tch]

ladies, if he:

- has emotional trauma

- was abused/neglected or had an unhappy childhood

- has daddy issues

- has dark hair and is a bit of a jerk

- is depressed af

- sarcastic and funny as hell

- probably gay

then he's not your man, he's my comfort character

[chainsxwsmile-personal]

“Chamberlain will help Emperor— Chamberlain always helps!”

(Text post credit to @pseudocapsicum)

[shyjusticewarrior]

[bigvoidfun]

Does anyone else ever get a Bully Urge? Like, you're walking by your sibling or your partner, just hanging out doing their thing, and suddenly your brain is like "do something to them. Flick their ear. Pinch them. Irritate the shit out of them." Or am I just a bastard?

[missmargaretcarter]

Overheard in a women’s fitting room: Oh my god, the pockets are real. That’s insane.

[im-a-sentient-magic-carpet]

Conversations with my best friend are always either deep philosophical discussions or this:

Her: hey how are you

Me: pan pineapple apple pan

Her: sounds good man

[vacantseance]

I'm here to be cremated.

[katnissandpeetamellark]

👱🏻‍♂️🌹💋💰

[kittyp333]

❧ that’s actually me in the photo. idk how they got my picture.

[mirriorball]

my boyfriend gets it :')

all jokes aside, important note on this: please recognize World Bipolar Day today. 4.4% of people suffer, and so many of them in silence. always check on the mental health of those you love, and ask for ways you can support them when they struggle.

[rag-breidfjord]

Can i Freudian slip into your DMs?

[shyjusticewarrior]

[thefuckihatenakingusernames]

I'm a (sock)puppet of my former self