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#give me step by step plz
mrkeatingsblazer · 2 years
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Me daydreaming about writing my book rather then actually writing it is not the vibe
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randomnameless · 1 month
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Land 1 done!
Without crossing the bridge to get rekt'd by the final boss and trigger a bad ending, of course :p
I know the game puts more emphasis on gameplay than on characters, unlike, say, FE 8x2, but damn if every little situation you recruit random characters makes me think of past FE events in different titles and it just... fits? Somehow?
Like, evil empire has trouble conquering a party of Cornia, but behold! A mysterious plague pops up, that is totally not tied to the shady as fuck necromancer who works with the evil empire and says it'd be annoying if people find a cure.
So we have some guy and his army of cleric wearing plague doctor masks trying to find a cure by, uh, experimenting/working on people who already caught the plague, even accepting to work with the evil empire because curing the plague is more important, right?
Ends justify means yadda yadda... save for the part I earlier mentionned, that it is heavily implied the evil empire is the one who created that plague to begin with!
Now, imagine in a FE game if, in the background, we had to rescue people or hear about people being afflicted by a strange and unknown disease... and if that disease was engineered by people for a further motive...
8x2? Nah.
We also have quests where people are fighting for the evil empire who is occupying their land because they believe as long as they obey their people won't be put to the sword...
(I watched my bro play the final chapter, we know how it ends lol)
Not!Cyril fighting against bandits, finding and helping a witch fend off people who are trying to "catch her" - we even get a flimsy excuse for a bikini attire in the process and an answer to the "why do i use spells to rejuvenate myself in a sexy body? It's because I won't be able to move as fast as I can now if I was a crone" other flimsy excuse, etc etc.
Now it's time to enter the land of fucked up siblings relationship (sure Virginia is Alain's cousin - who looks like his mom - and can end up with him, but this is not the kind of Jugdralian stuff I had in mind) and let me tell you, all those plot bunnies I had in Jugdral about Lester believing he was going to become Lord of Jungby all of his life, only to have his role/throne snatched before his eyes by a bum who's apparently his cousin and can use the legendary shiny bow of legend is... basically Drakengard (Drakenhold in english?), but up to eleven.
Ah, and it wouldn't be a post from me if I don't find a way to rant about the localisation lol
Josef, upon meeting Virginia, basically goes in the audio "it's been a long time since I last saw you". In the english version?
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Like what are you implying Josef, she wasn't a princess when you saw her last time or didn't have the "standing" fit for a princess?
Besides, I hope the release of the october book won't blow a hole in the Josef's "you were a teenager when we last met" by releasing character ages, but that's not really that important.
This however
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Alain greets his long lost cousin, nothing wrong here right?
Well, in the JP audio, he calls her with the "hime" suffix, showing as much deference as Josef, who is a retainer of the royal family. Virginia doesn't use any suffix because that's her, but in Alain's various support convos, we learn that he had to learn and to behave like a proper noble after escaping from his castle 7 years ago, and all this noble/formal stuff is something he doesn't use with his commoner friends.
Ergo, this minor thing here is important, especially in the Drakengard themes : siblings/relatives used to be close, but reuniting after a long period of time or several life changing events, they are changed and even if they want and try to, cannot be as close as they once were.
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savetheghost · 4 months
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wanna be put in a room with craft stuff for 10 years
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Agent H's Book Reactions
Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins
Revolution is rising in the districts of Panem as Katniss and Peeta are selected again for the Hunger Games Quarter Quell
-Unfair, that only Gale calls Katniss Catnip. I, too, would like to call her Catnip
-It's really fun reading the love triangle through the lens of what each boy represents (Gale: rage and rebellion, Peeta: hope and peace) because it so beautifully serves Katniss' emotions and journey. She chooses Gale when she decides to join the rebellion instead of running. She holds on to Peeta in the Capitol/Games. etc. Genius character technique, Collins
-I completely understand why Collins wrote it this way, but I wish that the victory tour had been longer. Like it goes by in pretty much two pages. I was looking forward to them going to each district, because it would help us get to know each district better and see the rebellions first hand. And I think it could've raised some tensions if while on tour, District 12 was being cracked down on and Gale got in trouble, and there'd be nothing Katniss could do. It parallels watching the Games and emphasizes the hopelessness and violence the Capitol is trying to inflict
-Between the victory tour and the Quell announcement, I was really bored. It was important plot set up and I really appreciate how these books dedicate time to Katniss's trauma and emotional well-being. But it dragged on a bit too long for me.
-I really appreciate the posts that point how Rue is the true start of the rebellion, but I don't want to mistake that for the impression that her death matters more than her life. She was a young Black girl, she deserved to live :(
-At first I was like, ugh, this Games feels different than the first. But, duh that's the point!! The first part of this book is about the districts uprising. The second part of the book is the microcosm of the districts, the victors uprising. The Games feel different because it truly is the districts against the Capitol instead of each other
-They say that once the gong rings, the solidarity that the victors showed during the interviews will be gone. But then they're wrong!! Katniss and all work in a team, and they rebel against the Games by showing compassion and solidarity. It's the victors working together to rescue Katniss. It's Peeta consoling the dying victor. It's Katniss taking the time to clean and soothe Beetee and Wiress. It's joking around with Finnick. It's Finnick having Johanna's back. That's the revolution!!
-I like the first book's arena more for how it was so realistic, but I can appreciate just how batshit traumatizing this book's arena is. Who tf thinks of raining blood??? Also I like the set up of the District 12 electric fence to the arena's forcefield. And how them destroying the force field is the literal AND metaphorical destroying the games for good
-Really sometime I should sit down with this series and just connect all the different parallels and symbolisms and set ups
-Peeta continues to be the best and my favorite
-"If it weren't for the baby"- PEETA MELLARK IS THAT BITCH. I LOVE HIM
-Unsurprisingly, I am down bad for Johanna. I want her to step on me
-*Me @me*: You cannot adopt another gorgeous, witty, secretly tragic boy. *Me, sighing, knowing this will not end well, but putting Finnick Odair in my pocket anyway*
-I know it was for the escape plan, but it was so cute how Finnick was obsessively counting the bread each time
-I couldn't tell if Finnick knew the truth on the baby thing, but I thought it was adorable that he seemed to so earnestly believe Katniss' lies, e.g., the baby, hearing the forcefield
-The whole hearing the force field thing is so funny because it has no significance to the plot, it's just Katniss overthinking things again and then having to keep up the lie
-I love Katniss and Peeta so much. They're so ride-or-die for each other before ever having real feelings (on Katniss's part at least) involved. Like the foundation of the relationship is just pure human empathy and friendship in the face of unimaginable circumstances. God damn
-I also really love how as much as Peeta gives Katniss hope, she also gives him hope. She saves him in the games. She makes life in District 12 worth living. It's not just one-sided, they save each other. Couples who mutually inspire each other to live=Top Tier
-I got confused on the ending, but why wasn't Peeta at the tree with Beetee? Finnick went after Johanna and Katniss after they realized the wire was cut. So I can get that Peeta would've wanted to go after them too, but Beetee would've insisted that he stayed put, right? Do they ever explain this?
-See, the rebellion rescuing Katniss feels less like plot armor to me than I think other books would've made it feel, mainly I think because Finnick and Johanna were still down to kill Katniss if it came to it and District 13 is very much also just using her in their Games
-Ohhh, the ending with Haymitch hurts so much. Because Peeta says that he lied to one of them about which one he'll keep alive. And we, like Katniss, know that he lied to Peeta because he agreed that it's Peeta's turn to live. But as much as he loves Peeta, turns out he lied to Katniss and us. The betrayal is real T^T
-The movie gives a cleaner explanation on why Katniss and Peeta can't know about the rescue plan
-Because I rewatched the movie immediately after finishing the book, Strokes of genius from the movie: 1) The little girl saying she wants to volunteer like Katniss (scariest moment of the movie) 2) The graffiti "the odds were never in our favor" 3) The shot of Johanna and Finnick leaning on the tree as they decide on Beetee's plan
-While rewatching, I saw a comment that was like "I can see how these books are beginning to reflect now in our real time." And I was like, hmm, yeah, like obvs we're not having children killing each other in an arena anytime soon (though we seem to be okay with children dying from gun violence and police brutality *side-eye*), but the series' themes of media, propaganda, and violence are very much in play now
-I think Hunger Games should absolutely be taught in dystopian fic sections of literature classes alongside things like 1984 and Brave New World (admittedly, Hunger Games was a little too disturbing for me as a young teen, but then again Brave New World was a little disturbing to me as a young teen SO)
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tricornonthecob · 5 months
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extremely specific work-related gripe that has been playing on repeat in my brain since yesterday:
Mudbox my betolerated, why you save paint layers as .tif's by default
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alteredphoenix · 11 months
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Jingliu does for me what Tyr*nde Wh*sperw*nd does not.
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hongcherry · 29 days
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on my mind || l.c (m)
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The handsome stranger at the pool gives you an experience you won't forget.
💦 Pairing: idol!Chan (Dino) x stranger!Reader (f) 💦 Rating/Genres/AUs: M(18+); smut (!!!), fluff, some angst; idol au, strangers to lovers au 💦 Warnings: Pet names (baby, pretty girl, beautiful), public/pool sex (bc of those pictures), unprotected sex (be safe!), no prep (be safe again!), bigDick!Chan, breast play, lowkey sad ending 💦 Word Count: 3.4k 💦 Author’s Note: Oh Lee Chan... How dare you do this to me 😩 (and ty @okiedokrie for beta'ing!!! 🥰)
seventeen masterlist | main masterlist
this blog is 18+. minors do not interact. plz & ty!
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“You know you’ve been staring for the past thirty minutes, right?”
Your gaze snaps up from your book. The handsome stranger stares down at you, water droplets dripping from his hair and down his sculpted body. You force your eyes to stay on his, but all you want to do is follow the water south.
You had hoped to be more discreet earlier, but supposedly you failed.
“S-Sorry, I thought you were someone I knew,” you lie.
The man’s lips tilt in a knowing smirk. His expression fans the heat in your belly.
“Am I?” he questions.
“No,” you reply and avert your focus on your book again. “Sorry.”
You expect him to leave, but he still blocks the sun from your view. When you realize he’s not moving, you look up again.
He beams a charming smile.
“What brings you here?” he asks.
You rest your book on your lap, keeping a finger between the pages as a bookmark.
“Paid for the pool, might as well use it,” you chuckle.
He laughs and glances back at the water. “You’re not really using it, though.”
You bite your lip. You were going to, but seeing the stranger and his friends play in it, made you want to watch rather than join. However, his friends had just left and now it was only you two.
“I used it earlier,” you lie again.
He cocks his head to the side. “Do you always lie to strangers?”
“What?” Your eyes widen; your heart races.
“Am I making you uncomfortable?” he asks, abruptly switching topics. His pretty smile falters as if realizing his friendliness has taken a turn.
You sit up and shake your head. “No! You’re not. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be,” he says and looks away for the first time. He glides a hand over his hair. The muscles in his arms bulge at the motion, and you force your thoughts to stay PG.
“I should head inside. It was nice meeting you,” he says, barely making eye contact.
You place your book down and rise to your feet. You tentatively reach out and brush your fingertips against his forearm to stop him from leaving.
He turns to you fully again.
“I’m Yn,” you introduce, hoping that will make him stay.
He gives you a tiny smile, answering sheepishly. “Chan.”
Is he shy now? You almost giggle at his change in attitude.
“What brings you here?” you reuse his question.
“Work,” he replies.
You glance around at the upscale hotel. “Must be a nice job.”
“It is,” he says.
Sensing he still feels nervous, you glance at the pool. “Join me for a swim?”
His brown eyes grow. For a second you think he’ll decline, but he nods and walks to the stairs. He takes the steps carefully and when he’s at the bottom, he holds out a hand.
You don’t need his guidance, but you accept his offer—if only to feel his strong hand around yours.
You let out a small gasp at the cold water. He chuckles as he watches you tense up.
He steps toward you and runs his hands over your arms carefully, not wanting to overstep a boundary. However, he must feel how you feel. There’s something between you two that makes you want to skip a few imaginary steps from strangers to friendship to maybe something more.
Your lips pull in a smile as he warms you.
“Thanks,” you murmur.
He nods then slowly steps away. He looks around; his sight snags on a volleyball floating at the other end.
“Want to play?” he asks, gesturing to the ball.
“Okay,” you reply. Hopefully doing so will alleviate some of the timidness.
Chan swims to retrieve it. As he does so, you sink into the water to get used to the temperature. You take the moment to admire Chan’s back muscles. They ripple with every movement he makes, and you wonder how they’d feel under your hands.
When he turns and catches you staring, he smiles. You glance away, embarrassed at having been caught.
“I kinda liked having your eyes on me,” he says playfully when he nears.
You tuck your chin down and fidget under the water.
He chuckles and taps a finger under your chin to get your attention.
“Ready to play?” he questions.
Eager to change the topic, you nod and stand.
Chan’s gaze follows the water rolling down your body. You’re glad to see he feels the same way for you.
You reach out to grab the ball and Chan snaps his eyes up, only now realizing he was staring. It’s his turn to look embarrassed.
Granting him the same courtesy, you let the moment go.
“First to ten wins?” you ask.
Chan swallows the lump in his throat and nods.
You take a few steps back before you toss the ball in the air. With your hands clasped, you hit it with your forearms, sending it in his direction.
Chan mimics your pose and bumps it back to you; however, it falls short and you miss it.
“First point goes to me,” Chan smiles. He pushes the water to make the ball float to you.
“Isn’t it your turn?” you wonder and grab the ball.
He shrugs as if to say it doesn’t matter. You nod and toss it in the air before you hit it.
You and Chan play until it’s four to two.
Chan eyes the ball in the air and then hits it with his hand.
You move to the side and hit the ball, though, it goes more up than out.
Chan rushes to it. He reaches out to volley it back but slips on the pool’s tiles. You don’t have enough time to react as his body collides with yours and slams you both under the water.
He scrambles to stand and lifts you by your sides to surface you.
You inhale a breath as soon as you can.
“I’m so sorry!” he exclaims, holding you tight in case you might fall back under.
A mixture of laughter and gasping comes from you. It’s probably not a pretty sound, but Chan smiles anyway. The worry etched on his face slowly fades.
“Does this mean I won?” you ask between giggles.
Chan laughs and nods. His wet hair sticks to his forehead and his torso shines under the sunlight. He’s beaming that handsome smile, the one that reads happiness and confidence. You really like his smile.
“Only because I’m disqualified for body slamming you,” he replies.
You shrug as if it doesn't matter. “It was fun.”
Chan raises his brows. “Being body-slammed?”
Another shrug. “It didn’t hurt.”
“I’m glad,” Chan says.
“So, what do I win?” you ask playfully.
It’s not until Chan squeezes your waist that you remember he’s still holding onto you. However, you don’t pull away. His touch feels nice.
“What do you want?” he questions in return.
You take the tiniest step forward.
“Something unforgettable.”
Chan’s eyes flicker to your lips.
“I can do that,” he whispers confidently. Then not even a second later, his lips are on yours.
Your mouths move in a heated kiss, tongues already sliding against each other. You’re quick to meet the other halfway to connect your bodies. Your soft breasts push against his hard chest.
Chan’s hands glide up and down your sides, thumbs brushing the side of your breasts. Meanwhile, your arms wrap around his neck, a hand caressing the back of his head to keep him close to you.
Needing to feel him more, you grab one of his hands and place it on one of your breasts.
Chan moans into the kiss and automatically squeezes them. He slips his hand beneath your swim top to feel you directly.
You pull from the kiss with a gasp and a moan.
Chan takes the opportunity to slide your top up, gathering it under your arms. He marvels at your exposed chest and cups your breasts in his strong hands. He pushes them up, rolling the flesh in his palms before pinching your nipples.
You mewl at the pleasurable pain, which causes Chan to smirk. He alternates between massaging your breasts and twisting your nipples between his fingers. You can feel how much he wants you against your body. It makes you eager to feel him inside you.
You grab his hands and gently pull them off. He frowns but doesn’t say anything. After giving him a reassuring smile, you lean forward to peck his lips.
Your kisses trail south, along his jawline, down the column of his neck, and in between the valley of his pecks. You take a detour to flick your tongue against one of his nipples, eliciting a small moan from Chan.
Your tongue plays with it before moving to the other and repeating your actions before continuing downward.
Chan watches attentively as you trace his defined muscles with your tongue. You ignore the slight chlorine taste as you lick his abs, tongue dipping in the divots of his body. You’d be ashamed of yourself if you weren’t so aroused.
Though, Chan doesn’t seem bothered at all as he stares down with darkened eyes and an open mouth. You kiss just above his swim trunks, a grin taking over your mouth.
“Shit, come here, pretty girl,” he mutters and pulls you up.
The disappointment of almost sucking his cock evaporates as soon as he kisses you roughly. He leads you both to the shallower part of the pool.
When he comes up for air, he takes a quick glance around. The area is empty.
He reaches out to grab a flat inflatable lounger that floats by.
“Get on,” he instructs softly and holds it in place.
You carefully ascend the floatie. Thankfully, the trees in the area block the sun from your eyes when you lay.
“Move down more,” he says, still holding it tight so it doesn’t flip from under you. “Wrap your legs around me.”
You scoot lower until your ass is toward the bottom of the lounger, legs around Chan’s waist to keep steady. You suck in a breath when his hard cock brushes your clothed center.
“You ever done this before?” you wonder, taking in your position. The height of the water makes the floatie align perfectly with his pelvis.
He chuckles. “Nope, so if this goes horribly wrong, I apologize in advance.”
You laugh. “I forgive you in advance.”
Chan grins and moves one hand to circle your clit while the other gropes your breasts. Your body jerks at his touch. The fast motions against your clit combined with the rough squeezes of your breasts heighten your arousal.
“I need to feel you, Chan,” you whimper.
“You are feeling me,” he teases, hands moving a little rougher to indicate what he’s referring to.
You whine pathetically as you buck your hips. “Inside me.”
Chan’s movements slow down.
“Okay, let me,” he begins to say as he trails a hand lower to your core.
You shake your head, grabbing his hand. You know he means to prep you, but you’re too eager.
“Just want your cock,” you beg. “Please.”
A smirk forms on his lips. He slowly takes his hands off your body, and you pull him closer with your legs, thinking he’s about to leave you.
“Easy there, beautiful,” he says and rubs your thighs comfortingly. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Once his words register, you nod sheepishly and ease your grip around him. Smiling, he tugs his swim trunks down enough to free his cock. Your pussy gets wetter at the sight of him.
“Let me know if you want me to stop, okay?” he asks and pulls your swim bottoms to the side. His focus flickers between your eyes and your dripping core.
“Okay,” you answer, eager for him to fill you.
Chan carefully inches closer and then gathers some of your arousal with his tip. You hold your breath in anticipation.
When Chan’s tip finally slips inside, your mouth falls open with a gasp.
“Fuck,” he mutters, sliding in gradually. You’re so tight around him.
“Open up for me, baby,” he coos and starts to rub your clit again. “Let me fill this pussy all the way.”
Your hands clutch the sides of the inflatable lounger. His girth stretches you in a way you haven’t experienced before. You focus on the circular motions against your clit, easing your body and letting Chan enter you easier.
“There you go, pretty girl,” he praises, pushing in the last of his cock.
“So big,” you mumble. You shift slightly and moan at the sensation. Chan’s circles on your bud falter.
“And you’re taking me so well,” he says with a smile.
He stays sheathed inside you for a minute. Your hips buck every so often from him stimulating your clit. Each movement makes you whine or moan from feeling Chan’s cock rub against your walls.
“Can I move?” he questions; there’s no pressure in his voice.
You nod.
Chan rearranges his hands to hook under your thighs. His palms the top of your thighs to ease any nerves you may have. Though, you’re not nervous at all. You may have just met Chan, but you know he’ll never hurt you. He’s been attentive to your needs and your comfort since he first spoke to you.
Slowly, Chan glides out halfway. The drag of his cock feels heavenly.
Then, he pushes back in.
He does this motion slowly, making sure you get used to the feeling of his thick cock stretching your walls.
“Faster, C-Chan,” you say. Every glide feds the fire in your belly. Whatever pain or discomfort you were feeling has disappeared. In its place is a lust that needs to be quenched.
“You sure?” he asks.
You nod. “Fuck me.”
Chan curses under his breath. His grip on your thighs tightens and his pace gradually picks up.
Before you know it, he’s pounding inside. He uses your legs as leverage, eyes hooded with hunger. Occasionally, his gaze moves up to watch your tits bounce with each slam of his body. The water laps around you both; some of it sloshes over the sides of the pool. The sounds of the water splashing and his skin hitting yours make everything feel sexier. You’re sure this looks like a scene from a porno, but that fact just turns you on more.
“Try to be quieter,” Chan says after a string of loud moans comes from you.
His suggestion barely registers in your mind. “I’ll tr—oh fuck.”
Chan chuckles and slows down. He trails a hand up your body to caress your face. His thumb glides along your bottom lip, pulling it down before letting it snap back in place.
When he goes to do it again, you open your mouth wider and suck his thumb into your mouth.
“Fucking hell,” he groans, sight locked on your puckered lips.
Chan moves his other hand to grip your hip. He begins to transition from powerful thrusts to sensual glides. He rolls his hips expertly against yours. Although they’re not fast motions, the slow slides in and out have your eyes rolling back. You hadn’t expected him to know how to move like this, but it’s obvious he’s skilled. You briefly wonder where the skill stems from. Has he had lots of practice having sex, or did he move his body in other ways a lot? His smooth motions remind you of a talented dancer.
“You feel so good,” he rasps and pulls his thumb from your mouth. He wipes your salvia along your lips, making them shine.
“You gonna cum for me, baby?” he asks, increasing his speed.
You nod, a choked cry escaping you when Chan connects his thumb to your clit again. He rubs it harshly while rocking into your cunt.
You bite your lip, trying to keep quiet, but it’s difficult when Chan’s fucking you so well.
Your legs tighten around Chan as the fire grows. It builds and builds until it’s too much to bear. Your walls flutter around his cock and before you can warn Chan, you’re cumming hard.
Chan continues to circle your clit, helping you ride out your orgasm. He only removes his hand when you squirm from his bruising touch.
“Think you can hold out a little longer, pretty girl?” he asks.
In a haze, you nod.
Chan unwraps your legs, hooking his arms under your knees and lifting you ever so slightly. The new angle lets him go a little deeper.
You clutch the floatie and hope you don’t pop the damn thing.
Chan’s hips snap into you fast and hard, driving you absolutely wild. More moans spill from his mouth as he nears his climax. You think he sounds so pretty, but you don’t stay on the thought for long. It’s hard to focus.
“Oh fuck,” he groans and pulls out quickly. He pumps his cock, abs clenching with furrowed brows.
Soon, your tummy is covered in white. Chan’s head rolls back as he releases his load over your body. You and Chan stay still, panting and coming down from your highs together.
Chan takes in a long inhale and finally looks down. His eyes scan the mess he made on you and your fucked-out expression.
He laughs softly. He tucks himself back in his swim trunks then reaches out to fix both pieces of your swimsuit. Afterwards, his hands swipe at the cum, gently cleaning off your body.
Chan leans down to wrap his arms around you. He carefully lifts you off the floatie and onto the pool floor. He keeps his arms in place as he stares with a big smile.
“How’s that for unforgettable?” he asks.
You lean into him, hands massaging his shoulders and neck. You feel dazed and overjoyed.
“I fear you may haunt my dreams,” you reply teasingly.
“Haunt?” He chuckles. “Wouldn’t I be blessing them instead?”
You laugh, shrugging. “Depends on if I can see you again.”
Chan’s smile suddenly turns into a sad one.
“I don’t know,” he replies.
“I can’t get your number?” you ask, heart filling with lead and weighing it down. You just met the man but the thought of never seeing him again cracks your heart.
He rubs his lips together in thought. Though before he replies, the sound of an opening door interrupts the conversation.
Two men peek their heads out. From your position, Chan’s back faces them.
“There you are,” one of them says. His smile is as bright as the sun.
Chan twists in your arms to see who it is. He must recognize the men. The aforementioned people drift their gaze to you. You can tell they want to tease Chan, but they don’t. They’re probably saving it for later.
“Do we have a schedule?” Chan asks.
“No,” the other with glasses says. “We just thought you were coming back with us, but no one’s seen you.”
“I’ll be there in a bit,” Chan replies.
“Don’t stay out too long,” the first says, a teasing lilt in his voice. “We have an early flight tomorrow.”
“Yeah, I know,” Chan says.
The men give you both a knowing smile, then leave the area.
Chan exhales a deep breath and slips from your hold. He takes your hand, leading you out of the water.
“You’re leaving tomorrow?” you ask, trying to hide your disappointment. You do a poor job.
Chan sighs and grabs the towel you had. He wraps it around your body and rubs your hands that hold onto the material.
“Maybe I’ll see you before I go?” he says, but you’re unsure if it’s a wish or a question.
“Maybe,” you say.
Chan cycles through his thoughts before speaking.
“I had a nice time, Yn. I won’t forget you.”
Your heart churns as if you’re going through a breakup. Your eyes quickly dance across his face, attempting to memorize every detail. You get the sense he’s doing the same.
“Me too” is all you say. You also had a nice time, and you definitely won’t forget this man. Not only because of the mind-blowing sex but also because he seems like a person you’d want in your life.
Chan leans in and kisses you. Unlike before, this one is slower. He takes his time moving his lips and gliding his tongue. There’s passion behind his movements that makes you crave to be more than strangers. This man oozes love, and you wish you could receive it wholeheartedly.
Maybe things wouldn’t have worked out, but something in your gut says even if you were to be loved by him for only a little while, it would’ve been worth it.
Chan would’ve shown you how it would feel to be truly adored.
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A/N: rip the contaminated pool 🥲
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miguelhugger2099 · 4 months
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Just a silly little request👉👈
Do u think fem!reader likes to wear crop top with no bra and Miguel's boxer. You two are just flirting and teasing each other until Miguel decided to toss the remote to reader for movie night and reflex, she tries to catch it reveal her tits and Miguel just "😳... Nice catch..." And smut if u want. Having his hands speezing them I'm going insane 😭😭
Just One Touch
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a/n: this ask has been in my inbox for so long and ur not gonna believe what got me out of my month long stump to write this. everyone thank sir-mix-a-lot's song "ride" it possessed me and gave me energy. excuse the crappy writing, i'm still lowk having writers block so it's not my greatest work. please enjoy and as alwayssss i can rewrite this if you'd like <3 Art: mar_mar0u on instagram ! Unedited btw, plz dont crucify me ill die :(
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It wasn’t unusual for you and Miguel to wind down after the sun had set. Movie night was a must, whether it was cheesy romcoms for you to sob to, horror movies for Miguel to be annoyed at, or even action movies to make fun of–as long as it was together. Still, Miguel teased you by holding the remote up above his head and out of your reach. He grins with one hand on his hip and watches you reach up with no progress in sight. “Give it!” You laugh, trying to keep your anger believable. “No, first you take my clothes and I know you’re gonna pick one of those creepy knock off animated movies.” He chuckles and he walks off. Due to the size difference, every step of his was three of yours–practically chasing after him. “Put respect on Over the Hedge’s name! It’s not even a knock off!” Miguel plops on the couch on one side with a huff of laughter. “Fine, fine. Here–take it!” He throws the remote above your head and you pause and stumble back.
You reach high up to grab the remote. “You asshole!” You laugh. The remote hits your fingertips and bounces a bit farther back. Your crop top rides and flows up as you lean back onto one foot to finally grasp the device in your hand.
Miguel could feel everything happen in slow motion. The small glimpse of your underboob before your nipples finally come into view. The grin on Miguel’s face slowly drops and he could feel drool slipping from his lips. He watched your boobs bounce, the roundness of your flesh and perky buds making his cheeks go red. He can’t help the disappointment in his face when your arms fall back down, shirt hiding the glorious view of your tits.
“Caught it!” You smirk at him triumphantly. His eyes continue to glance at your tits.  “Yeah, uh…” He gulps. “Nice catch.” He adjusts his shorts, hoping his growing bulge wasn’t too apparent.
You don’t notice, too engrossed in your victory and making Miguel speechless. So, you crawl in his lap, Miguel’s hands suspended in mid-air as you nestle yourself in his arms. You feel his muscles surround you like a warm comfortable blanket, leaning your back on his firm chest while you click the buttons to turn on the TV.
“So what are we picking this time?” You ask, flipping through random trailers to find what you’re looking for.
“Huh? Oh, uh, anything’s fine.” Miguel shrugs half-heartedly. He’s too focused looking down at your crop top. Slowly and gingerly, his fingers caress your stomach–light and feathery as if trying to be discreet.
“Yeah sure, whatever. Don’t complain if you don’t like it.” You laugh softly, clicking on a random movie that looked good enough.
“Mhm.” Miguel mumbles, not even hiding his disinterest in a damn movie right now. While your eyes are on the opening scene on the TV, Miguel’s eyebrows scrunch together, his lips into a tight line as he resists his urges.
He can’t help it though. He gets handsy, Miguel carefully caressing your stomach. You barely notice it since the two of you always get snuggled up like this.
You only notice when he hikes higher up, his hips shifting slightly while his fingers run up and down the valley of your tits. You smack his arm around your waist with the remote.
“What are you doing?” You ask, trying to sound annoyed but the smile seeps through your tone.
“Nuthin’” He murmurs. Miguel then feels the curve of your breast, his fingers itching for a squeeze.
“We’re supposed to be bonding.” You move to turn your head up at him. You try to meet his eyes but he stays glued downwards to your chest.
“We are.” Miguel insists, his lips slightly parted. His thumb swipes across your nipple and you gasp, feeling your cheeks burn. He can feel the nub perk up and his tongue darts out to lick his lips, biting his bottom lip to hide the satisfied smile on his face.
Miguel takes his chances, bending down to kiss along your neck, tugging you closer to him and making you melt. His body moves against yours and your eyes flutter shut. His mouth gently sucks and licks your skin and you shiver. Miguel grabs your left tit, the plump flesh squeezed in his palm. His fingers flick your nipple, circling around before gently twisting it.
You back arches and you moan. “Ah–fuck, Miguel!” You hissed, a burning heat crawling up your neck. Your hand lifts up to curl in his hair while he attacks your neck, his other hand running down to his boxers you were wearing. He slips his fingers in the front hole of the boxers, using his index and middle fingers to spread your folds apart. You feel him nip your neck with a smile as he smears your slick around your clit.
He then uses both of his hands to lift your shirt up and over your head. Your breasts are now out in the open, the cool air hitting your chest and making your nipples hard. You barely get a word out, Miguel already cupping your boobs and squeezes them. Your hips buck back to grind on his crotch, eyes closing as he plays with you. Miguel used his fingers to tease your nipples simultaneously, flicking and tweaking them. He lifts them up and watches them fall down before squeezing them again. Your pussy is soaking through his boxers, aching for more stimulation that’s making you feel empty.
His eyes are dark watching his own hands play with your chest, the memory of the bounce of your tits as you caught the remote high in the air. He wanted to see that again.
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Miguel could feel his cock swell and twitch along with each bounce of your breasts. You have your body arching, hands behind you and holding onto his thighs. He plays with your tits switching with his hands or his mouth–but if you asked him, he preferred sucking on them. So that’s where he was now, lips attached to your right nipple and his right hand playing with your left. You slammed down on his cock, whining since you barely felt him thrust up. But in all honesty, Miguel could do this forever with your tits in his mouth and his cock buried in your cunt. While his tongue sucked and lipped your nipple, he knew if he didn’t focus, he’d cum instantly. He looks up at you after playfully biting down on your nub, your squeaks making his dick twitch against your walls. You look down with glossy eyes, hips stuttering and pussy throbbing when you see him smirk up at you with your boob in his mouth. One of his hands that was on your waist comes up to your back to keep your body arched. Miguel scrunches his eyes shut, eyebrows furrowed while he sucks on your nipple, his hips jerking and balls slapping against your ass. You wail with each thrust, falling forward and holding onto the backrest making your boobs squish in his face. Miguel groans as he lets you fall on top of him, hands falling down to your ass as you grind on him. His cock slips in and out of your wet cunt with a wet squelch. It makes you bite your lip with a loud whimper, the action making your man under you tug on your nipple with his teeth. He’s obsessed with you, Miguel pulling away just enough to make your tits swing in his face. He glances up at your pleasure filled face, sweat glistening down your face and body while you panted and whined. He’s entranced, eyes falling down to follow the way your boobs bounce as he fucks up into you. Miguel trusts you to keep fucking yourself on his while his hands leave your ass to come up and cup and squeeze both your breasts. He kneads them and watches your mouth drop open to moan. Your head hangs and your foreheads almost touch. Miguel doesn’t need to tell you a damn thing, his lips parted while he looks at yours. You lean down to kiss him, Miguel immediately slipping his tongue past your defenses with a low groan. He continues groping you, his hips smacking up with your thrusting and he can feel himself about to cum. He can tell you’re about to too by the way your pussy spasms wildly, sucking him in deeper and soaking him in your slick.
So he hammers into you, grunting as he puts all his strength in making you cream. Your eyes roll back, mouth separating from his to dig your nails into his shoulders and roll your hips. You can barely get a word out, garbled moans of his name escaping you while your body twitches, ecstasy flowing through from top to bottom. Miguel watches your chest heave as you catch your breath, your juices dripping out of your a making a sticky mess in his lap. You’re dizzy and weak, body flopping forward on his chest. Miguel soothes you, curling his hand in your hair and pressing you into the crook of his neck. He kisses the top of your head and you’re too numb to feel him take your body off him. He places your back down on the couch, hair sticking to your face with sweat, lips plumped from kissing. You’re whining when your sensitive folds feel his still hard cock rub in between them, accidentally slipping his tip in a few times. You swallow to get the dryness out of your throat. “Mig…Mig…” You’re cut off when Miguel slams into you, your body jerking and tits bouncing with the hard thrust. Your hazy vision rolls onto his face, Miguel glued onto your chest still. He gives another few soft thrusts and watches your boobs jiggle around. You feel his cock jump inside your walls, a soft hum of approval coming from deep in his throat. He bends down, biting and licking the side of your tit to add another mark to his collection. His teeth marks littered around your plump and round flesh–his favorites being the ones around your areola.
His face is buried in your breasts while he pounds into you, your head thrown back and legs locked around his waist. Oh, he’s in heaven.
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starkeyisthelastname · 9 months
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step dad rafe?? plz 🙏 i beg
“Are you gonna let daddy see this pretty pussy?” Rafe’s voice soft yet demeaning as his fingers traced over the damp material of your panties. Your head shakes slowly as you make yourself look away from the man who was making you wet by just his gruff tone. You wanted to be good for him, but found yourself cowering away at the thought of being so naughty with the man your mother had married. The light slap to your thigh made you look at him once again, knowing you couldn’t ever really hide from him.
“Don’t get shy now when you and I both know you aren't.” He told you. “What would your mother think that you are soaking your panties for your stepdad like a slut?”
Frowning, you looked at him through thick lashes. “But- Rafe.” You whisper, him calling you such a dirty name making your princess parts feel funny. You were not a virgin, but still inexperienced despite you sending naughty pictures to the boys around the island. You then felt his fingers push your panties aside, ignoring your protest.
“But what? Don’t give me any shit about how this is wrong either other wise your cunt wouldn’t be leaking.” He told you, not wasting anytime in sliding two fingers in your tight hole.
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bitchimasnake-sss · 10 months
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im sorry for this one guys (may god help me repent for my sins)
stepbro! luffy, zoro, sanji x fem!reader
in which you'e living out a fucked-up fantasy
warnings: very taboo subject, porn without plot, please dont read if uncomfortable!!!, the guys are lowkey toxic (sorry again), penetration, doin' it raw (use protection plz), oral (f!receiving and m!receiving), derogatory, literally uses porn logic im sorry; MDNI (this is for the best i promise)
luffy:
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"lu-luffy" the gasp turns into a choked moan as the man in front of you drills into you harder, his fingers digging into your cheek absentmindedly. his words are a whisper, as if he gives two shits about getting caught. liar, if he cared about getting caught fucking you, he wouldn't have walked into your room at 2 in the morning when your parents are one room down the hall, and practically kissed you till you were pulling his pants down and begging him to fuck you. "what's wrong?" he pants, laughing out a bit. almost mocking you, "gon' cum on my dick again, yn? am i doing that good huh?" your words are an incohorent jamble, just a rough selection of pretty moans, groans and broken cries of his pretty name. "j-just like that. ngh, fuck. fuckin' take it" he thrusts, his cock stretching your cunt as he slams hard against you again and again. your eyes are closing fast, teeth sinking down on your bottom lip as you feel your body convulse, being flooded by the oncoming orgasm. "eyes on me" he flashes you a cocky delirious smile as his cock buries deeper within your cunt, filling every inch of your pussy with himself. and then he's moving faster, more erratically as if he's losing sanity by the second. "please, yn. please, please, pl-ease" he mumbles, "let me cum— inside."
zoro:
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all of your concerns of your parents walking into the living room in the middle of the night and seeing you and your older step-brother tangled together had flew out the second you felt him against your cunt.
and then, with another particularly harsh kiss against the bundle on nerves, you came. thighs shaking, eyes closed and back arching off his mattress. you came hard.
your hands pulled at the familiar green locks, tugging and tugging as you feel kitten licks against your overstimulated clit. his tongue played with your core with practiced ease; going up and down, sideways and in circles till your hips were bucking up wildly and your hand was pushing him down harder against your cunt. "zo-zoro, zoro fuck, imsofuc- fucking close" as if on cue, his actions became harsher. he alternated cruelly between sucking and softly kissing. one moment being merciful before torturing your ravaged cunt. his hums and moans against your cunt deepened the coil in your stomach till it was all you can feel— in your blood-stream, against your skin, in the back of your skull.
all you knew and felt was roronoa zoro.
sanji:
but his tongue was still lapping up against your folds, unyielding. stroking the nub up and down, tongue slipping into your leaking entrance swiftly, humming as you squirm and force his face away.
your fingers were pulling deftly against his scalp, tugging till it pained him enough to stop. but instead, as retaliation, he curled his biceps against your thigh, burying his face harder against your aching cunt. "zo-zoro, no please please, no" you whined, arching into his touch as he continued his assault against your core, "it's too sen-sitive, please." his head lifted for just a moment, lips drenched in your essence and a cocky grin plastered onto every inch of his face. his bottom lip jut out, "aww too much?" you nod frantically and he smirked, a self satisfying smile of some sorts.
"too bad im having the time of my life." one of his arms reached upwards, putting two fingers in your mouth, "how bout you shut up and take it?"
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"yn, love" he whines when your hands skim over his pants for the millionth time this evening, "we're supposed to do laundry, quit teasin'." you were supposed to be doing laundry and he was supposed to be helping you out. but somehow, cramped inside that small room, behind those closed doors your lips had come to ghost over his and his hands fleetingly touched your waist. "what?" you giggled, teasing him through his sweats again, "i thought i could repay you for the favor last night." "really?" he corks up an eyebrow, his fingers finding peace against your cheeks, "get down on your knees then" "but what if your mom walked in-" "as if a whore like you fucking cares. knees, now." you flashed him a light smile, getting down till you were face to face with his erection. your fingers swiftly pulled his sweats down and you looked up at him doe-eyed when his cock hit against your lips with a salty, lingering taste. his large palm against the back of your head guided you till you were taking in his dick, sucking intently on every inch. "fuck, darlin', just like that. yn fuu-fuck", he moaned as you swirled your tongue on his tip, then tracing over the light vein imprints. when he bucked his hips into your mouth harder and pushed you in deeper, you hummed against him, choking at the sudden intrusion. continuing your movements till you felt your jaw go slack, you heard his ragged breathing before he whispered a faint, "fuck i'm gunna cum, sh-shit" with a bit of his essence dripping off your chin, you look up at your step-brother. his gaze intertwined with lust, he gives you a smirk, "good fuckin' girl"
a/n: supposed to be on hiatus but who cares at this point, hope you like it
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miley1442111 · 4 months
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(part 6) ladies choice- a.donaldson
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a/n: dw there are more parts after this :)
summary: how you start moving on, and how Art starts moving away.
pairing: art donaldson x fem! reader | patrick zweig x fem! reader
warnings: smut, piv (wrap it up plz), reader is mad mean to Tashi, usual upset and depressed Art, etc.
PART 6 of 12
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“What the fuck are you doing here?” you asked. 
“I wanted to talk,” Patrick shrugged. His loose t-shirt hung off his well-hidden muscled torso and arms. 
“About what?”
“Your break-up.”
“If you’re about to try and convince me to get back with him-”
“No way!” he assured you.  “I wanted to see how you were. Art’s broke up about it but it’s not like he’s the one who got cheated on.”
You were both silent for a moment.
“How are you?” Patrick asked, fiddling with the straps of the tote bag over his shoulder.
You sighed. “Honestly, I’m kind of shit.” 
“I guessed. That’s why I brought ice cream,” he smiled sheepishly. “And I thought we could watch something?”
You smiled. “That sounds nice.”
“So let me in then,” he smiled. You opened the door and the night was full of laughter, ice-cream, and hazily falling asleep in his arms in your bed. 
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“Stay in touch, yeah?” he smiled from the end of your bed. He had to leave, his train was in an hour and he wanted to be at the station before he missed it out of pure idiocy. He’d never been good with being on time. 
“Yeah,” you agreed and took his hand, lazily bringing it into your own. “Thank you for last night Pat.”
“Thank you, you make a lot of things a lot better.” 
You smiled at his compliment, and smiled even harder when he pressed a soft kiss to your hand before he left. 
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“What the fuck are you doing here?” Art cursed, watching Patrick leave your dorm room. 
“What the fuck are you doing here?” Patrick shot back, a satisfied smirk on his face. 
“Visiting Y/n-”
“You mean your ex-girlfriend, right?” Patrick mocked and Art rolled his eyes. 
“I have some of her old stuff, I wanted to give it back,” Art admitted. “Now, what are you doing here?”
“You shouldn’t care. We’re not friends anymore, remember? And you and Y/n are broken up, because you cheated on her, remember?” 
Art felt the stab in his heart when he remembered his infidelity. He didn’t love Tashi. He loved you. He’d always love you. But Tashi and he made sense. Before you, he’d wanted Tashi. Now he couldn’t have you, Tashi was his second choice. 
“See you around, Arthur,” Patrick smiled, walking past him. 
Art was seething. 
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“Are you fucking Patrick?” Tashi demanded, stalking onto the court as you ran drills. 
“No,” you answered, your focus staying on the balls being thrown at you by your coach.
“Then why did Art tell me you were?”
“Because he’s a liar?” You sighed after missing a ball. “Keep me out of your relationship, you’ve already fucked one of my boyfriend behind my back.”
Tashi rolled her eyes. “Why are you-”
“Focus on your injury, Tashi. Maybe one day you’ll be able to beat me,” you snarled. 
Tashi’s face fell. 
“Oh wait, no you fucking won’t. ‘Cause you’ll never play again,” you snapped. “Now get off the court, actual athletes are trying to play.”
Tashi walked away, a certain shake in her step as you watched her retreat. 
You had to call Patrick. In recent weeks, he’d been your only real friend. The only person who understood you and the pain you were under. Tashi had fucked Art, Patrick was cheated on as well, right? You two were one in the same. 
“Patrick?” you questioned. 
“Hey honey,” you could hear the smirk in his voice. “Everything alright?”
“Can you come visit soon?”
“Of course. It would be my pleasure,” he smiled. 
"When can you come down?" you asked, biting your nails.
"How about Friday?"
"Perfect."
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When Patrick opened your dorm door, he found you studying over some material for a biology test.
"Hey beautiful," he smirked and pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head.
"Hey Pat," you sighed. "How are you?"
"I'm good, happy to see you. How are you?"
You held back tears as you explained what had happened earlier that week, but when he pulled you into his arms you broke.
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It felt good having Patrick fuck you. You didn't know how it had happened. One second he was comforting you about your fight with Tashi, the next his lips were on yours, the next you were being fucked into next week on your bed.
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“So beautiful,” he smirked, pummelling into you. “So pretty like this, taking me so well.”
“Patrick-” you whined, grasping at the headboard of your bed as you bucked off the bed. You could feel every inch of him, and trust me, there was a lot. His fingers swirled over your needy clit as you bucked into his hips, fucking yourself onto his cock.
“Such a pretty girl, too pretty for Art,” he groaned into your neck. He took notice of how you clenched around him when he called you pretty. "You're too good for them, for both of them. Art and Tashi. I'll make you forget all about them, yeah pretty?"
You honestly could've cum for his words right there. He looked so good right now, a thin layer of sweat across his naked body, his curly hair on his forehead wet with sweat. “I-I’m gonna-” 
“You gonna cum? Come on, cum on my cock,” he whined. This is what he had wanted, he wanted to be with you, sure. But the sex was a big part of it too. You were drop-dead gorgeous, and from what Art had told him, you were incredible in bed. Art hadn’t lied.
It was all too much, too good. His hand on your waist, his way-too-big cock inside you hitting spots Art could only dream of hitting, his fingers swirling around your throbbing clit, it was all too good.
“Fuck!” you shouted and came around him with a shudder. He bit down on your neck as he came inside the condom, broken moans leaving both of your mouths as you rode out your highs. 
Patrick lay beside you, his hands wrapped around your bruising waist. 
“So…” you took a deep breath.
“I wanna go out with you,” he admitted. “Not just to get back at Tashi and Art, because I think you’re really interesting and special.”
You smiled. “Alright.”
“So, can I take you out on a date?”
“Yes.”
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Everything was going wrong. "We want you to go pro," his coach smiled at him. He nodded, no excitement behind his blank expression.
"Can't wait," he plastered on a fake smile.
"You'll be represented by Nike, your female ambassador is Y/n Y/l/n. We're so excited for you."
Art smiled but it was fake. everyone knew it was fake. Seeing you at practice everyday was sure to kill him, if Tashi didn't first. Their relationship was slowly falling apart, and it was all because of him.
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"I think we should see other people," Tashi sighed over dinner. Art just nodded along.
"I agree."
"You have to get over her Art, she's with Pat now-"
"What?" he snarled, venom in his confused voice.
"She and Patrick, they're going out now," she explained. "I told you-"
"No you didn't. You never told me."
Art's head was spinning, you were moving on. You were moved on. He'd lost you.
To Patrick.
Great.
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art donaldson masterlist :)
navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games, challengers :)
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reallyromealone · 3 months
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Can I request an smiley x reader omegaverse like omega reader is Mikey’s sibling. Like the first time that smiley sees him he instantly knows that’s his fated omega but he has to go through Mikey to try and court reader plz and thank you.
Title: lover
Fandom: Tokyo revengers
Characters: Sano family, Toman, smiley
Fic type: omegaverse
Pairings: smiley x reader
Warnings: male reader, reader insert, omegaverse, Omega male reader, protective Sano siblings, fluff, cute, soulmate
Notes:
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Mikey was always an overprotective brother, scaring off anyone who went near his siblings and (name) especially as the Omega was a cutie that grabbed everyone's attention much to his older brothers annoyances.
The Sano brothers always chased off suitors, keeping him away from gang shit but sometimes it was unavoidable.
"(Name), what are you doin' here?" Baji asked as (name) sat at the steps of the shrine doing his homework "Shinichiro doesn't need help at the shop and home was boring so Mikey dragged me here" (name) explained simply as mitsuya nodded "you never been to a meeting, have you?" He asked and (name) shook his head "nyope but Mikey would rather die than have be go out and about and Iza is busy with his own stuff so.... Here I am"
(Name) Met a few Toman higher ups, though (name) was usually helping shin or grandpa so this was one of his first times meeting a few people here.
(Name) Was curious as two motorcycles pulled up, a set of twins hopping off "so why the hell are we here?!" The pink haired one yelled out and (name) was entranced immediately, a small chirp leaving his lips and the smiling teen whipped his head around to see the Omega and a rumble left his throatbas the world halted for them, (name) feeling the need to get closer to the Alpha.
"Alpha..."
"NOPE ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT!"
(Name) Snapped from his trance as Mikey looked ready to murder at the lovestruck look his brother was giving Smiley, he didn't want any fucker near his brother and definitely not one of the biggest Fuckboys in the gang. "(Name)! I will bring you home I swear to god!" Mikey barked and (name) rolled his eyes "oh please! I'm not doing anything!" He fired back and the blond groaned annoyed "just stop making eyes at my captain and smiley stop looking at him like that or I'll kick your ass!"
That did nothing, Everytime smiley shot the other a flirty glance, (name) smiled all flustered and that just egged the Alpha on further.
"I swear to fucking god!" And (name) went back to his homework.
"He is NEVER going to a meeting again!" Mikey said angrily as they got home, Izana glancing up as Emma and shinichiro made dinner "what happened?" The teen girl asked, tilting her head slightly and (name) pouted "I didn't do anything! Mikey is being dramatic!" (Name) Huffed as he sat beside Izana "Iza! Make Mikey stop being a drama queen"
Shinichiro looked at Draken who was leaning on the door frame "ken, what happened?"
"(Name) Met his dated pair" he said simply and the room was silent as Izana moved to sniff his brother "you don't smell like (scent)" the white haired man accused and they looked at him expectantly and (name) pouted as grandpa made a grunt "when do we get to meet em?" The old alpha asked and (name) huffed "after I get to meet him!"
"So you are trying to kill me!" Mikey cried and (name) rolled his eyes.
It wasn't till the following week that (name) saw smiley again, the two halting as (name) went to get groceries for dinner "it's you!" (Name) Was over the moon as the older kawata looked at him with a flirty grin "watch out now, Mikey might kick my ass" he teased and (name) huffed "he wouldn't dare" oh Mikey would but (name) in turn would throw shit at him.
Smiley walked with (name) around the store as they chatted, falling so easily into a routine as the Alpha kept his fated pair close as the Alpha paid for the other "you don't have to!" (Name) Looked guilt as smiley shrugged "not gonna let my mate pay for shit"
The two walked to the Sano house as shinichiro was reading a magazine on the engawa casually "OI! one foot apart you shits!" The eldest barked out and (name) pouted, the other two brothers poking their heads out and Mikey glared as Izana stared coldly at the elder twin "(name)! Didn't I say no dating till I'm dead!" Mikey grumbled out and (name) rolled his eyes "I'm older than you!" (Name) Fired back as the two squabbled leaving the eldest siblings to judge smiley "this house is traditional when it comes to courting, if you want to be with him it's not gonna be easy"
Shinichiro wanted his younger brother to date a nice alpha not.... Not smiley.
Anyone but smiley--- I'm almost anyone because he's seen the people his brothers hang out with.
Maybe like mitsuya, yeah mitsuya would treat him well.
And thus started the courting process, all dates had a a chaperone of one of the siblings, the two never getting to be alone (unless you count the times smiley snuck into (name)s bedroom so they could makeout) and the brothers judged any gift that smiley got (name) "looks cheap" they said but (name) was giddy at anything his mate to be got him.
(Name) Got him little trinkets and a cute bracelet set that the Omega seemed very proud of and Smiley wore the matching bracelets with pride.
"Where ya taking him"
"What are you gonna do?"
"Hope you booked a reservation for three"
Smiley was ready to throttle his close friend and his family but knew they were just worried about their pack Omega dating though thank fuck grandpa Sano was chill with him and actually seemed happy that (name) found his soulmate.
"These goofs are all planning on moving out, (name) is the only one who is interested in running the dojo" grandpa Sano said randomly while Smiley waited for him to finish getting ready "you're a good kid, I know what my boys do so I know you can hold your own" he continued and smiley for once wasn't so well... Smiley but instead Nahoya.
"So what do you want to do, after school?"
"My brother and I want to run our own ramen shop, we have a name for it and everything"
The old alpha hummed, seeming pleased with his response "hardworking young man, (name) is a strong young man, doesn't like to be tied to his omega status despite his brothers attempts... Let him do what makes him happy" the elder man asked him and nahoya nodded "if he wants something, I'll do whatever I can to provide it"
"Good, now (name)! Hurry up! You're making this young man wait forever!"
"I'm coming I'm coming!"
Grandpa Sano watched how much love was between them, he hoped he could get to live to see them get married.
Maybe even to see a few pups.
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cinnasweetss · 4 months
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to love and to cherish. | l.hs
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genre: smut, very minimal plot, fluff (a pinch.)
characters: husband/dad!heeseung, wife/mom!reader, “uncle”!jake at the end, seung (reader & heeseung’s son)
wc: 2.8k
content below cut. (plz read…or you’ll be v surprised…)
content: established relationship, mentions of pregnancy & marriage, domestication, reader is a stay at home mom, body insecurity, body description, SLIGHTTTT dacryphilia, lactation, love making, tit play, pussy eating, unprotected sex, creampie, pet names (hun, love, baby, etc.), praise, etc etc…
A /N: i’m experimenting in my writing (still tame imo)! this might not be everyone’s cup of tea n that’s ok <3 thanks for reading!!
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"dinner looks great, hun." heeseung slides in, slipping a hand around your waist from behind, pressing a kiss to your cheek.  it startles you, whipping your head around to him, soft smile plastered on his face. 
"Didn't hear you come in." you mumble, returning his smile before you continue the dishes. "Got you something." he pulls away, shuffling behind you, "give me a second, hee." you need to finish these dishes tonight. it'll be pain the ass tomorrow if you don't. "Did you put Seung to bed? Told you I wanted to see him, hun." he says, immediately noticing how quiet the house is tonight. lights dimmed, living room picked up and neat instead of the usual plethora of toys. "he got fussy." 
"Baby, come on-"  he nags, only because you have barely looked at him since he stepped in. no 'how was work, honey?' and a cheerful smile like usual. 
"Give me a minute, heeseung!" 
there's a long pause in the air, making you immediately regret raising your voice, dropping the plate in your hand back into the soapy water, "I'm sorry." 
heeseung told you to not let it get like that. he told you to not stress yourself out when you both found out you were pregnant. he knew this would happen. it was inevitable. but you promised him. "Look at me." 
"Oh, hee..." you immediately soften, face falling into your hands once you see the beautiful, huge bouquet of flowers in his hands. he sets the bouquet down on the island, quickly moving to wrap his arms around your crying figure. you quickly accept the embrace, wrapping your arms around his neck. "Why are you crying?" he chuckles, rubbing his hand on your back soothingly. "I'm sorry!" 
"It's okay, love." he pulls you off of him, wiping away your tears. "so pretty." he leans in to kiss you, using his thumbs to wipe the rest of the stray tears. 
Heeseung is so good to you. he always has been. when you met him six years ago, when you married him three years ago, and when you gave him his firstborn a year and a half ago.  his love has been unconditional, unwavering, always consistent. all you could ask for and more. 
"I told you not to stress yourself out. You can ask me for help." he's smiling, despite your continued tears. you feel so awful. "But you're working-" he stops you there, "so are you, love." he knows that being a stay at home mom is a lot, a lot more demanding than his silly little corporate job. "what are you handwashing the dishes for, anyway? we've got a dishwasher." 
"cause, it's a lot to run it..." he sighs, face shifting to a scowl. he hates when you talk about the price of things, bills, anything with money. "It's not, and that's not for you to worry about." it's firm, almost scolding. but you know it's just because of the many times he's had to tell you to not worry about the bills. not that you've seen one in years. 
"Get in bed. I'll finish up." he pulls away then, moving to the sink. you scurry behind him, grabbing a vase to put the flowers in. "Bed, babe. I'll do that too." 
"let me warm up your food-" he doesn't have to say much, turning with a dissatisfied expression across his face as he leans on the counter. "Get upstairs." you know better than to argue after the third time, so, you do as told.
...
he joins you just an hour later, walking in on you fumbling with the baby monitor, making sure it's on and working before you set it on the bedside table. he eyes you, wet hair stuck to your shoulders and neck, saturating the t shirt you have on. 
he grabs your hand, pulling you back to the bathroom. he places you infront of the mirror, reaching for the hair dryer in the cabinet. "Did you even towel dry it? you're soaking." 
"Thought I heard Seung crying..." you mumble, heeseung running a brush through your hair. "That hairdryer- Dyson. it's so expensive. you won't even use it."he grabs a towel, gently drying each lock of your hair, then your neck and shoulders. 
"I do use it!" five times since he got it for you during Christmas. You'd brought it up maybe once, showing him a video on TikTok of some influencer using it. it was probably the millionth video you'd showed him. still, he paid attention. "Sometimes." he agrees, flashing you a playful smile in the mirror. 
"you don't have work to do?" you look at him through the mirror, squeezing the water out of your hair with the towel. "Work? While i'm at home with my wife?" he turns on the hairdryer after, running it over your now damp hair. 
this week he's been coming home without his laptop. spending almost no time in his office downstairs, instead getting into bed with you every night after work. 
you hadn't said it out loud, but he knew you were bothered by sleeping first. sleeping next to an empty space that he only filled from the hours of 1am to 6am. disappearing into his office right after dinner. you continue watching him through the mirror, fond smile on you lips as he finishes. his eyes catch yours, mouthing a playful "what?" before he shifts his eyes back to your hair. 
he turns off the hair dryer, using a brush to smooth out the now dry hair. he guides you out the bathroom, stopping you in front of your shared dresser.
reaching for the bottom of your tee, he pulls it up, only stopping when you step back and push his hands away. "come on, you gotta get out of this. it's wet." 
"I'll do it." "Babe, really." 
you surrender at that, raising your arms so he can lift your shirt above your head and get you a new one. Only he has his gaze locked on yours...trying to remember the last time he was intimate with you. the last time he saw you undressed. you notice his expression change, unfamiliar glint in his eyes. 
had it really been that long? 
"What, hee? you're staring..." you ask worriedly, afraid he might not like what he sees. you damn sure don't look like the woman he married, not after having his child. 
each time you look in the mirror you're reminded, each time you look at your wedding pictures, each time you get naked infront of him, each time you look at your son. 
your arm lays against your chest, holding your breasts as you reach for another shirt. Heeseung's way quicker, grabbing your arm before you can reach it. "Wait."
his lips are on yours seconds later, pulling your body flush against his, trapping you in a very passionate kiss. 
you know what he wants when he kisses you like that. when he pulls you in by your waist and holds your cheek with one hand. when he lifts you up and takes you bed, placing you against the mattress softly. your stomach flutters with excitement, eager to experience a different type of intimacy with him.
he pulls away, pulling at his tie with one hand and letting it fall to the ground, undoing a few buttons of his shirt after.
he connects your lips again as wall as your groins, grinding softly through kisses. it's enough to get you worked up, moaning into the kiss when he gropes at a tit. 
he gives it some love with his mouth too, sucking one and squeezing the other. its enough to stimulate your ducts, breasts tingling as they secrete milk. he purposely squeezes a nipple, milk spilling from the ducts, as you squirm beneath him. his skilled hands force a moan from you, his tongue swirling as he sucks, likely making your other breast leak too. 
his hips rut against yours, grunting at the little bit of friction it gives. he's gotta get out of these slacks, and fast. he pulls his mouth away, kissing down your chest and abdomen, paying special attention to those areas he knows youre insecure about. 
your lower belly that's riddled with stretch marks and hips that look the same from carrying his child. he wouldn't trade you for the world, not when you've given him the best gift on gods earth. a family. 
he pulls your night shorts down with one motion, doing the same with your panties before he spreads your legs. his kisses move to your thighs, stopping when he reaches your core. he moves your hips to the edge of the bed, kneeling before you. "Fuck.." he feels his mouth water just looking, pushing your legs before he dips his head between your thighs. 
six years and every time feels like the first. six years and neither of you can get enough. 
he always takes his time, soft kisses against your pussy to start, soft licks against your clit when he slides his tongue through your folds, huge hands that knead at the flesh of your thighs to stimulate you even more. he gradually moves to sucking, tongue flat against the little bundle of nerves, forcing moan from you.
your eyes flutter closed, sinking further into the mattress as you reach for his hands. 
your fingers intertwine perfectly, much like they did the first time you two met in college. he was sweet then, he's even sweeter now. always, always so compassionate and caring, even more since you've gotten married. 
he watches from between your legs. eyes shut, brows furrowed, mouth agape as you let out the prettiest moans. matching the pretty expression you have. 
he knows you like the back of his hand, sucking your clit just how you like it. your back arching off the bed tells him so. especially when you remove a hand from his, sliding it through his hair instead to swirl your hips. 
"oh, god- hee!"
he can hear your breath quickening. short and shallow through endless curses as your orgasm builds. "fuck, baby, i'm cumming!" it hits you like a truck, heeseung moaning as you cum right on his tongue, nothing else. holding your hips steady so he can eat you through it. through the soft convulsions and quiet moans, hands that grip his and his hair. 
heeseung finally pulls his lips way, rising from the floor with lips coated in your arousal. he doesn't lick them, keeps them wet and moist so he can lean down and kiss you. he's letting you taste yourself as well, sliding his tongue past your lips to give you sloppy, wet kisses. 
you pull at his button up, pulling it from his slacks, moving to remove his belt right after. you pull away from the kiss, pulling at the buttons with frantic hands. "help me, hee..." you mumble, looking up at the man above you. he forces you both up, reaching to unbutton his pants as you work on those damn buttons. 
"take your time, darlin'. Im not going anywhere." he kisses your forehead gently, capturing your lips again once you finish. you push his shirt off his shoulders, only satisfied when you hear it make contact with the wood flooring below. "tell me how you want me." you barely manage to get out between kisses. he doesn't respond for a minute, focusing on kissing you before he makes up his mind. 
"bend over." he pants, catching his breath from the very heated kiss. you do as instructed, turning around to bend over for him. his hands immediately attach to your hips, one hand pressing against the small of your back, guiding you into position. "Arch that back, yeah..." he pulls you back against his dick, hard length sitting right between your ass. he retracts, sliding his length through your folds, coating it in your arousal. 
you can feel him line himself up with your entrance, head of his cock just barely penetrating, pausing before he decides to fully slip inside. a soft cry leaves you,  leaning yourself away from the intrusion that has your walls stretching. "Uh-ah, keep that back arched for me baby." that makes you whine, forcing yourself back into position as he pulls you right back on his cock. "Good girl..." he coos, hand rubbing softly against your back to soothe you, legs already trembling just from him sliding in. 
he takes you painfully slow, pulling half his length out, pushing it back in, in a long drawn out movement. his eyes are stuck right where you suck him back in, despite your little noises that tell him you're struggling with it. he barely has to move his hips, you're pushing back on him likely without even realizing. 
"Fuck," his dick is soaked, coated in your wetness, glistening in the soft light coming from your bedside lamp. He grabs both hips, taking over your soft and cautious movements, replacing them with his own. Still slow, but much deeper, holding your ass to his hips each time he pushes himself back in. 
"Taking it so good, baby." heeseung doesn't know why you're always so caught up in your own thoughts. each time he fucks you like this, you forget all about your silly little insecurities. It's all proof of the woman you are today, anyway. the mother and wife he's built within you. 
"Hee..." you reach a hand back to hold his, heeseung quickly pinning your arm behind your back, hand clasped within yours. His movements increase, throwing his own head back as your body drives him to near madness. you sink further down, hand knitting into the soft fabric of your cream coloured duvet. 
so deep, so big. he's hitting all the right spots, bending over you to reach and grab a tit. he squeezes at the flesh, mouth steady kissing on your shoulder as he fucks you near completion. the both of you. "fuck, baby! harder!" nothing but a word, he happily obliges. he's been waiting for you to say it since he started. "Yeah?" his breaths shallow and short as he fucks into you harder, a loud moan of approval from you forcing a smirk on his lips. "Yes! god, heeseung!" from his lips on your neck, to the way his balls repeatedly slap against your clit, you're already there before you realise. "Like that, yeah, let it out."
you grab at his flexed arms beside you, crying out as you both ride out your orgasm together. Heeseung's hips stutter as cums inside you, sloppy uncoordinated thrusts pushing more waves of pleasure through you. "Shit." He blinks through the haziness coursing through his body, only pulling out when both of your breaths return to normal.
you stay even when heeseung leaves, relaxing your body against the bed. he comes back, turning you back over so he can clean you up, laying next to you right after. 
comfortable silence fills the air, heeseung pulling you into his arms when you snuggle up close. "I love you, hee."
"I love you more, baby." 
...
"Say hi!" you grab your sons arm, waving at the man in the doorway. "My big man! Say hi to uncle Jake." he takes the baby from your arms, bouncing him in his. "Where's your dad, big man? always leaving mommy to do the work, huh?" you move to the kitchen, starting the coffee maker for heeseung.
"Dad is doing laundry." Heeseung emerges, passing Jake the diaper bag. You furrow your brows at that, heeseung hadn't said anything about Jake taking Seung. "Morning." he slips behind you, pressing a kiss to your cheek. "Seung is-"
"You need a break." he quickly interjects, eyebrows raising when you don't immediately respond. "What? You don't wanna spend some time with me?" it's sly, the way his hand slips under your shirt to grab the soft flesh of your ass.  "I was the only man in your life at one point, you know." he smiles, moving his hand back to a more appropriate position. "Whatever." you laugh, eyes shifting over to Jake who's preoccupied with your son. You slip past heeseung, going to say your goodbyes. "Thanks, Jake. You really-"
Heeseung's familiar hiss of disapproval stops you. Jake simply laughing, "It's all good. My girlfriend wants to see him anyway. she calls it playing 'house'."
"Marry her and have your own, dude." heeseung comes over, kissing his son’s cheek. "Yeah, yeah." he's always dismissive when the topic comes up, but you know he's just waiting on the right time. "I'll take off then." Jake smiles at the both you before he makes his way to the front door. Heeseung pulls you in as you both wave Jake and your son goodbye. 
"Let's have another one." 
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theemporium · 1 month
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Flirtini "Shouldn't you be in my bed?" with Sirius plz plz plz plz
thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
11. “Shouldn’t you be in my bed?”
.
“You look smashing today, love.” 
“Beat it, Black.”
Sirius’ smile only widened at the utterly bored tone of your voice as he settled into the spot next to you. Your eyes remained on the party around you, watching with narrowed and calculated eyes. It was almost endearing, in the same way a snake staring at its prey before it attacked was. 
He didn’t think he had ever been more attracted to you. 
“Aw, baby, don’t go breaking my heart like that,” Sirius commented with a mocking pout on his lips and a hand over his heart. “You’re killing me.” 
“Good,” you deadpanned. 
“Careful,” he teased, head tilting in amusement as he watched your hand grip the glass in your hand. “I almost detected some emotions there. You’re losing your touch.” 
“Oh, bite me,” you scoffed as you finally turned to look at him, your eyes narrowed in annoyance and irritation. 
“Just tell me where,” he retorted with a charming smile. “I promise I’m obedient when the incentive is right.” 
“Shouldn’t you be running around with your little prankster manchildren friends?” You commented, your jaw twitching a little as he took a step towards you and reached up to softly tuck some hair behind your ear before you could bat his hand away. 
“Shouldn’t you be in my bed?” He replied, so unbothered and unfazed by your clear disdain. 
It irked you.
“Do you ever stop?” You huffed out, stepping back a little but he just moved closer.
“You complain so much but if I was really annoying you, you would have blasted me across the room with a simple flick of your want,” Sirius noted with a smug look in his eyes. “I saw you do the exact same thing to Rosier the other week.” 
Your lips twitched a little. “The worm deserved it.” 
“Oh, I don’t doubt it, baby,” Sirius grinned back at you. “But that just tells me that you have gotta like something about me if you’re not hexing me into next Sunday.”
You rolled your eyes. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Sirius.” 
“Sirius, is it now?” He teased, his voice positively gleeful. “I’m breaking down your walls, love. You’re bound to give in soon enough. I know you want me just as badly.” 
You let out a small huff of amusement. “Whatever helps you sleep at night.” 
“Got some really pretty dreams of you that help me sleep at night,” he retorted, flashing you a wink before he took a sip of his drink and turned on his heel to walk away.
.
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mariahcarreyyy · 6 months
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Congratulations on the 2k 💕💌
Can I plz ask for "I don't deserve you." "yes, you do." + Charles Leclerc, like the reader comforting him after a bad race or something
# prompt no.16, "i don't deserve you." // "yes, you do."
mariahcarreyyy's 2k celebration announcement post
To Charles, qualifying eighth meant failure.
But doing it in Suzuka only made the constant tug on his heart worse. You could hear it on his radio, see it when he shrugged off everyone's comforting touches and darted towards his driver's room, head bowed shamefully.
He could act like he wanted to be alone, but you've been there when Ferrari messed up his races too often to believe him. You give the media personnel you'd been talking to a tight-lipped smile before excusing yourself.
Worrying your bottom lip between your teeth, your eyebrows furrow in concern when you see the bright red '16' etched on his door. The thin walls weren't a rumor; Charles' sniffles flowed through the cracks, and it made your blood run cold.
Three knocks—Charles' pitiful noises quiet down, but there's no clumsy shuffling to indicate him opening the door.
"Charlie?" You call out, your voice twinging in desperation. "It's me."
Three seconds later, Charles unlocks the door, leaving it ajar. It's his way of giving permission when his voice inevitably fails him every week. You take it as it is, stepping inside cautiously. One wrong move, and it would all go downhill.
His eyes are rimmed with crimson, glistening in the dimly lit room. His cheeks are wet, fresh tears overlapping the dried ones. His lips are wobbling, trying to contain the sob that would otherwise be wretched out of him.
You want to cry for him.
Despite the frequency at which you have to comfort Charles after a bad qualification or race, your movements are still hesitant. You stand in front of where he's sitting on his thin bed, nudging his thighs closer and clambering onto his lap.
"I'm sorry," you whisper, entangling your fingers into his hair, and the choked sob that leaves his throat makes you tighten your hold subconciously. "I'm sorry this happened. Here, especially."
He burrows his face into the crook of your neck. You can feel the uncontrollable tears trickle down your skin and stain your shirt; you couldn't care less. You wrap your hands around his neck and bring him in closer.
"I-It's so unfair," he murmurs into your skin, his voice shaky. The vibrations on your skin make you flinch slightly.
"I know," you sigh, because there's nothing else you could do.
Charles pulls away slightly, his arms still tightly wrapped around your waist but his head craned to meet your eyes. The look buried in him had you resisting the urge to walk out of the garage and scream at every Ferrari worker in the paddock. You softly cup his cheek instead.
"I don't deserve you," he breathes out, thick with sadness and realization.
You shake your head, your nose rubbing against his ticklishly. "Yes, you do."
"No," he sounds like he's made up his mind. If it matters, he doesn't show it, merely pulling you in closer, like you'd run away the moment his grip loosened. "I really don't."
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daydreaming-nerd · 4 months
Text
The Prophecy (Lucien Vanserra x Rhys! Sister)/(Azriel x Rhys! Sister) Part 3 (Azriel's Version)
Part One , Part 2
AN: "Majesty, Palo is exhausted. Because Majesty only Palo can take this (angst) and this (groveling) and give you...a masterpiece."
No fr guys I put my whole puss into this plz tell me if you liked it
check out my masterlist
Summary: The only thing worse than having Azriel not know about the bond is watching him and Elain carry on like she doesn’t have a mate as well. Lucien and you have been long time friends but things change after one fateful starfall celebration. It’s not wrong if both of your mates don’t want you right? 
Warnings: angst, fluff like so much fluff, no editing (I'm so tired omg)
Word count: 9,370
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We arrived in the house in silence, the only thing to fill the void was the crackling of the enchanted fire that always sprang to life whenever I walked through the door. My eyes were fixed on the floorboards, studying every grain of wood as I put together what had just happened. 
I had told Azriel about the bond, and I did it in anger. I had imagined telling him a million different ways over the past 400 years but never did imagine doing it out of spite. I was just so angry with Elain and her insufferable entitlement that had me seeing red. If anyone should act in such a manner, it should be me, I was a princess after all. 
I was furious with Elain there was no doubt about that, but the voice that kept echoing in my mind was Azriel’s. How he yelled at me. I had known him my whole life and I had never once been afraid of him, until today. 
As if he was tired of the silence, Lucien brushed his hand under my chin bringing my gaze to his, it wasn’t until then that I realized I was crying. 
“Are you okay?” he asked, brows furrowing at my tear stained cheeks. 
“Yeah,” I laughed him off, wiping the water from my face. 
“I’m sorry I interfered like that, I wasn’t sure if you wanted to speak to him or if you wanted me to kick his ass. But he seemed mad and I wouldn’t stand for him yelling at you.” Lucien apologized leaning against the back of the couch a good three feet away sensing I needed some space. 
“I suppose that I wasn’t sure what I wanted either,” I sigh leaning against the doorframe. “Thank you for stepping in. I think it was for the best.” 
“Of course, I’ll always be there for you,” Lucien nods before resuming his staredown with the floor, probably trying to make sense of everything just like I was. “Az seemed…concerned for you. I think the bond snapped for him.” 
“It did,” I say, running my hand over my chest, as if I could touch the faint glow of the bond that now sat in my chest. “It clicked the moment he saw us in the kitchen.”
“Are you happy it clicked?” he asked, once again asking all the questions I truly didn’t have an answer for, at least not yet. 
“I-I’m not sure.” I say honestly, knowing I didn’t need to hide my true feelings from Lu. “I’ve pictured him finding out a million ways, but over the last couple years I’ve kind of given up on the whole endeavor. I felt like I made it clear that I liked him, and he only met me with complaints about other women. First Mor and then Elain.” 
“Maybe he’s changed,” Lucien pointed out. 
“Even if he had it’s not because he loves me.” I murmured sadly. “You heard him in there. He only wants me because he feels entitled to me. He never once acted like he cared about me beyond being his best friend's little sister.” 
“I suppose you’re right, it’s hard to forgive 400 years of cruel behavior,” Lucien muttered, still staring at that little spot on the floor. 
I strode across the room and leaned against the couch with him. I wanted to say something, anything to break the silence. But it was as if all the air had been sucked from the room in one foul swoop. I had just let out a 400 year old secret and for the first time ever, our mates seemed to give a damn about us. I look to Lucien who is still processing everything and I recall how Elain was so upset to see her mate with another female.
“Elain…” I started, wanting to tread carefully. “She seemed pretty upset,” I said, only stating the obvious. 
Lucien chuckled, “Yeah, I think that’s the first time she’s ever called me her mate.” 
“And how do you feel about that?” I ask wanting to give him the same room to speak that he gave me. I knew if he didn’t feel like sharing he wouldn’t, Lucien was no pushover. 
“I feel strangely happy,” he says and for the first time since we got back his lip curls into a half smile. “I think that she might be willing to give me a chance.” 
My heart warms at the idea of Lucien finally getting to have a chance with his true mate, “I’m really happy for you Lu,” I smile, patting his hand that sat on the back of the couch. 
He snaps out of his trance, “that’s not to say that you’re not- you’re a wonderful woman y/n-” he rambles. 
“Hey, HEY!” I shout getting his attention. “I’m happy for you Lucien. You deserve this,” I laugh at his attempt to not hurt my feelings. 
“Thank you y/n,” he smiles, grabbing my hands and squeezing them. 
“What do we do now though,” I sigh looking at his family ring on my finger. 
His eyes flit to the ring as well as his thumb brushes over it, “We continue on as normal, we can push back the wedding. I’m not confident in what Elain wants from me at this point and you clearly are at odds with Azriel. If things don’t work out…” he trails off thinking about hsi next words. “If things don’t work out I would still be honored to have you as my wife. I still feel like we could make eachother happy.” he says earnestly. 
I look into his eyes of russet and gold and see that he truly means every word, “Okay,” I nod my voice barely above a whisper. 
“Okay,” he agrees, keeping his voice down as well. “Shall we head to bed?” he asks. 
“We shall,” I laugh, following him up the stairs. 
That night we didn’t make love, we cuddled as normal though, but somehow even that felt wrong, now that the bond I prayed over for so long hummed within my chest.
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 While the little High Lord in training was typically quite docile, he had just learned to crawl and had begun flapping his little wings, which meant trouble was becoming the new normal. Which is exactly what had happened today…
“Nyx no!” I shouted as he reached for a heavy book on one of the bookshelves, his tiny wings helping him to gain the extra inch or two of ground he needed. 
I grabbed him from underneath his shoulders and brought him into my arms, bouncing him on my hip as his eyes caught the shiny necklace I was wearing. His little hands grabbed at it and I figured it was better than a vase or another heavy book. 
“Just wait till he can actually fly,” Lucien chuckled, coming up behind me.
“That won’t be for quite a while thankfully,” I laugh, bouncing the babe up and down.
“Are you so sure about that? Cassian seems to already be giving him lessons.” he points out. 
“I don’t even want to think about a flying toddler,” I scoff and Lucien chuckles behind me. 
 He pressed a kiss to the top of my head and I could feel his lips curling into a smile.“You’re going to be a great mother one day” he admitted. 
“I’ve always wanted children,” I said and a beat of silence passed until I decided to be bold. “Lu, do you think we could ever have children?” I ask, afraid to turn around and possibly see a wary look on his face.
I felt Lucien’s chuckle reverberate behind me, “Of course, I’ve always been fond of children myself,” he laughed. 
I whipped around with Nyx to search his eyes for a hint of uncertainty, but he seemed happy about the idea, “Really?” I asked in disbelief. 
“Of course,” he assured me. 
“I want a million just like little Nyx here,” I smile looking at the babe in my arms. 
“Minus the wings of course,” Lucien laughs behind me and I pause. 
My entire life I had always pictured my children with wings. Small, delicate little things that I would ‘ooo’ and ‘ahhh’ over.  I remembered seeing the Illyrian children in Windhaven growing up, I was always so happy when mothers would let me hold their babies, their wings so adorably small. I looked forward to having winged children of my own, I always pictured them scaling Azriel when they were little like Nyx, and as they got older I would watch as Az taught them to fly.
“What is it my dear?” Lucien asked, breaking me out of my trance. 
“Oh it’s nothing, it’s just that when I pictured my children I always figured they would have wings,” I say, pressing a kiss to Nyx’s temple. 
As if summoned, Azriel walked in, Rhys and Feyre in tow, signaling that their meeting was over. His eyes flitted to me, no doubt having heard what I had said. Lucien’s hand tightened on my hip.
Feyre’s eyes sparkled at the sight of her son and Rhys eyes sparkled at the sight of Feyre taking their babe from my arms. I reluctantly gave Nyx back, already missing being able to pretend he was my own. 
“He was a little angel,” I report to Feyre.
“If by angel you mean hellion,” Lucien chuckles behind me. 
“I would expect nothing less from a child raised by this family,” Rhys laughed, wrapping one arm around Feyre and brushing a hand against his son’s cherub cheeks. 
A silence rolled over the room as we all watched the little family reunite. I couldn’t help but flit my eyes to Azriel, who looked at them with a grin and a longing in his eyes. His eyes find me and I don’t dare look away. 
“Can we talk?” Azriel asked timidly, taking a step away from the doorway he leaned against. Feyre and Rhys take out of the room, no doubt feeling the change in the atmosphere.  
I searched his eyes for a hint of aggression but all I found was remorse, “Yes we may,” I say quietly.
Lucien releases his grip on my hip as I follow Azriel into Rhysand’s study and close the door behind me with a resolute click signaling that I was locked in here with him. Az takes up residence by Rhys’ desk, leaning against it like some sort of tortured man. I couldn’t help but notice he was still in his fighting leathers, his wings tucked in tight and his knuckles perched over his lips, like he was contemplating what to say. Even now, when he was at his most vulnerable, he was so beautiful. 
“I’m sorry for the way I acted last night. I yelled at you and I shouldn’t have,” he says fidgeting a bit. “Its just… it’s just that I was so pissed when I found him with his hands all over you and you just seemed so happy.” 
He sighs running a hand through his hair staring at the ground, still unable to meet my eyes. 
“I think that’s what bothered me the most,” he continues. “You seemed…happy.”
“You were upset because I was happy?” I scoff furrowing my brows at him, the fucking gall of this male. 
“No, no! Gods y/n,” he corrects me, running his hands down his face clearly upset with himself. “I think I was upset because I wasn’t the one making you happy.” he finally says and I can hear the vulnerability in his voice. 
I’m completely taken back by his words, at the fact that he admitted that he wanted to be the one to make me happy like that. The way Lucien did. It didn’t make any sense, given the fact that he never showed me in the last 400 years. 
“That’s funny coming from a male who’s been complaining to me about the females he’s been in love with for the past 400 years.” I deadpan, crossing my arms. 
“Is that how long you’ve known? 400 years?” he asked me, voice rising a bit. 
I nod, “I knew the night you danced with me on solistance in the Hewn City all those years ago,” I confess. 
“Fuck y/n,” he groans running his hands down his face. “Why didn’t you tell me?” 
“Because you started panting after Mor and the second you gave up on her in walked Elain!” I shouted, it was the most obvious thing ever as to why I didn’t tell him. 
“You had to know that you were first,” he says, snapping his head up to meet mine, pleading in those hazel eyes. 
I gave him a blank stare not knowing what he was talking about. 
“Please tell me you know you were the first, before Mor, before Elain, I was practically on my knees for you,” he confessed. 
Once again I’m left speechless. Could it be true? That he had wanted me before I even knew about the bond? 
I shook my head, even if it was true he was speaking in past tense. I didn’t want him to be my mate because he felt like he had to be, I wanted him to love me, truly love me. I wanted him to choose me.
“I had no idea,” I admit feeling a bit of shame. “But that doesn’t matter anymore, it’s all in the past. I’m not mad at you Azriel.” 
“Thank the cauldron,” he breathes, crossing the room to cup my face.
I place my  hands on his wrists and pull them away from me, “Az I think that you should be with Elain,” I say, stepping back from him. 
“What? No.” he shakes his head and I take another step back.
“You clearly love her and she loves you, the cauldron made a mistake by making us mates, it's as simple as that,” I say trying to hide my tears.
I loved Az, a part of me always would, but I wouldn’t be his consolation prize just because the cauldron fucked up and made me his mate instead of Elain. I couldn’t live with that. 
“No don’t say that, please don’t say that,” Az pleads, his voice softening. 
“I’m sorry Azriel but I won’t be your consolation prize,” I say before grabbing the door handle and walking out into the living room where Lucien was. 
Azriel goes to say more until he hears the hitch in my breath. There, before me, Lucien is tucking a stray hair out of Elain’s face and placing a kiss on her knuckles. A sweet gesture, one I’ve probably read about a thousand times in my romance novels. Lucien’s eyes flit to mine, and I can honestly say I’ve never seen him so happy. 
“We’re going to give it a shot,” he smiles happily, putting an arm around Elain. 
“Really?” I ask looking to Elain who smiles brightly. 
“Yeah we are,” she says smiling up at Lucien. 
“Oh I’m so happy for you two,” I cheer before engulfing them both in a hug. 
“Congrats you guys,” Azriel mutters from behind me, seemingly abandoning whatever he was going to say to me in favor of praising his friends. 
Lucien chuckles at my excitement, “Don’t get too excited, we’re going to have to move my stuff out of your place today, I think it’s time I move back into the townhouse,” he smiled. 
“Well what are we waiting for? Let’s get started!” I cheer, grabbing his hands to winnow us away. 
In reality I wasn’t excited about the idea of moving, and much less excited about the idea of my little townhouse being empty again. But I needed to get away from Azriel. 
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One week later:
After the all day affair of moving Lucien’s accumulated stuff out of my house and in the townhouse I was back to loving alone. Which at first wasn’t terrible. I was content to read my book and cook for myself when necessary. But after about a week I began to miss the food Lucien would make, or having someone to lie next to. It was a strange feeling, it felt like a breakup, but I wasn’t sad. I missed having another heartbeat in the house, not Lucien himself. 
After a week of getting my affairs in order my brother finally asked me for some help and I was thankful for the distraction. All week I had been in my own head about all that had happened, with Lu and Elain, with me and Az. I needed a break to think of something else. 
That’s how I found myself slipping on an old day court dress and getting ready to winnow to see Helion, an old friend of mine. I was leaving the house and locking the door when I ran smack into a large chest I screamed being taken off guard. 
“Sorry I didn’t mean to scare you,” a familiar voice apologized, I turn to find Azriel standing before me. 
“It’s okay, I should’ve been paying more attention,” I chuckle awkwardly. I hadn’t heard from the spymaster in a week, why would he come to talk to me now?    
Azriel’s eyes furrow from where they tower over me, “Why are you dressed for the Day Court?” he inquires. 
“Oh well,” I look down at the swaths of white fabric that cascaded down my body, suddenly feeling a bit exposed from off the shoulder dress. “Rhys wants me to go and schmooze Helion a little bit. Something about wanting to get him to agree to better trade deals.” I laugh remembering how my brother agonized over it the other day. 
“So he wants you to go and flirt with Helion?” Az cocks an eyebrow at me. 
“Well Helion and I go way back, and he’s always been…well keen on me.” I say honestly and I watch as Az bristles just a bit. I can’t even count the number of times the High Lord as tired to get Cassian and I in his bed
“I’ll give Rhys one thing he sure is ruthless,” Azriel chuckles trying to play off his nerves. 
“Is there something I can do for you?” I ask, still wondering why he’s here, at my doorstep. 
“Oh uh, no,” Azriel stutters. “Well actually I was walking by and I saw this and I thought of you.” he says pulling out a white rose. It looked like he had plucked it right off the bush down the street. “I thought you should have it.” he finished. 
I take the rose from his hand and notice that the thorns have all been cut off. I eye Truth Teller strapped at his side and the lingering thorn that was still stuck on its sharp blade. 
“That was very thoughtful of you Az thank you,” I tell him sweetly, taken back by his gesture. 
“You’re welcome,” he says, seemingly relaxing at my acceptance of his gift. 
I check my watch, “Well I really do have to go, Helion is waiting for me,” I wince moving past him on the stairs so I can get past the words my brother has on my place. 
“Yes of course,” Az says following me down the steps and out the wrought iron fence. “Do you need a ride?” 
“I’m okay, I can winnow,” I chuckle, closing the gate behind me. 
“Well I guess I’ll see you later then,” Azriel voices with a hint of a sigh. 
“Yeah I’m sure you will,” I reply before winnowing into Helion’s mansion. 
How could Az be so calm about all this? It was like he was trying to force himself to have feelings for me, figuring he better learn to love me now that he’s shackled to me for eternity. Part of me wondered if Rhys had given him a firm talking to and convinced him to attempt to like me.
“There she is,” Helion mused from the top of the stairs coming down the stairs dressed in his usual attire. Part of me hated that I found him attractive, in another life, if he wasn’t so promiscuous, I might’ve seen myself standing by his side. 
“Helion,” I smile, pulling him in for a hug. 
When we pull away his hands linger at my waist and his eyes look at the rose in my hand. “What’s this?” he asks plucking the rose from my hand. 
I think about the encounter with Azriel, how forced it all felt.
“It’s nothing,” I replied, shrugging my shoulders. 
Helion tosses the flower aside before throwing his arm over my shoulder and leading me inside, “So, your brother has sent you to convince me to agree to his new trade agreements.” he smirks.
“He’s done nothing of the sort, I came to visit an old friend of my own accord,” I tease, knowing Helion isn’t as daft as Rhys makes him out to be. 
“We’ll see about that new treaty after some wine, and tell your brother that next time he wants to use you against me as leverage he should just send you naked,” Helion chuckles. 
I erupt in laughter, slapping his arm as he leads us to a white couch with a bottle of wine sitting on the coffee table. 
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Three days later after successfully getting Helion to agree to a new trade treaty I found myself sitting in my living room with a glass of wine enjoying the fruits of my labors. As soon as I told Rhys about the High Lord of Day’s cooperation he sent me one of his finest bottles of wine as a thank you. Not that I required any thanks, I enjoyed spending time with Helion. 
My silence was interrupted by my door opening and closing. I just about jumped out of my skin, the only one who had the key to the place was Lucien and he had given it back a long time ago. My heart pounded as I stood from the couch in my nightgown and robe. I had turned in for the night and certainly wasn’t expecting visitors. I lift my romance novel over my head and step around he couch ready to swing when I see Azriel locking the door behind him quietly. 
“Azriel you scared the hell out of me,” I sigh, lowering the book. 
He turns from the door looking me up and down taking in my casual attire hungrily. “I’m sorry I guess I’m just used to walking right in, I wanted to give you these,” he says holding out a large bouquet of white roses, exactly like the kind he gave me the other day.”
“Thank you Az, they’re beautiful,” I say wearily, taking them from his scarred hands. “I’ll uh- I’ll just put them in water,” I tell him, padding into the kitchen to grab a vase and fill it. 
“I thought since you liked the other one I gave you that you might like those ones too,” he says walking into the kitchen and leaning in my doorway. 
I place the two dozen roses in a vase,“Well I appreciate them, it’s been a while since I’ve had fresh flowers in the house,” I divulge to him, remembering how Lucien used to bring them home all the time. He would always ask for Elain to make him a bouquet, his little way of speaking to her in a way that didn’t make her uncomfortable. The thought had me thinking of how Lucien and Elain were probably sitting at a nice dinner right now, had me questioning why the fuck Azriel was here. 
A silence fills the room as Azriel sits admiring either me or the flowers, from where I’m standing it could be either or. I walk around the kitchen island to test the theory and sure enough his eyes follow me as I lean my back against the side closer to him.  A wave of embarrassment slips over me. Did Rhys ask him to bring more flowers again? Was I really that pathetic? 
“Az why are you doing this?” I ask, gesturing to the flowers behind me. 
Azriel straightens taking a tentative step towards me, “Because I want what Elain and Lucien have. I want you to give me a chance to be a good mate,” he says softly. 
I look to the wooden floors below me, my bare feet messing with a loose floorboard, “You don’t have to do this Azriel. If Rhys sent you I’ll just cover for you and say you came.” I say not daring to look at him. 
“I’m not here because of Rhys, I’m here because I want to see you,” he implored and I heard his feet shuffle closer. 
“I’m still not your consolation prize just because Lucien and Elain are doing well. I won’t do that to myself,” I say, continuing to mess with the loose floorboard. 
“You’re not my consolation prize y/n, you��re my mate.” Azriel states, his voice becoming more urgent causing me to tighten my arms around myself ever so slightly. 
His boots come into my line of sight and suddenly he’s titling my chin up to meet his pleading gaze. I’m suddenly all too aware of how underdressed I was. There was a time when I would’ve killed for this. But now? I won’t let myself be hurt again.
“Y/n please-” 
“Azriel I’m at peace,” I snap, cutting him off and looking down at our feet once again even though his hand still rested under my chin. “For the first time in 400 years I’m at peace. I have loved, and pined, and thrown myself at your feet for 400 years, and I am finally happy in my exile. So forgive me if I’m hesitant to give that up so quickly because you all of the sudden want a mate.” I bit out.
His shadows dance around my hands and I move my fingers out of their grasp, like their cold kiss was burning me.I wait for him to say something back, for him to breathe wrong, yell at me or leave but he doesn’t move. I let my eyes flit up to his, and I find him staring down at me, like he’s been waiting for me to look at him this whole time. 
“I’m not going to give up,” he states, if he was sad or upset by my previous words he doesn’t show it. 
I sigh, tossing my head back, “Az please,” I beg. 
“No I’m serious, I’m not giving up on you, on us,” he maintained steadfastly, his hands not leaving my cheek as he steps even closer to me and my back hits the cool granite behind me. 
“Azriel I think you should go,” I grit out, the second my body stiffens under his he steps back giving me my space. 
“Alright I’ll go,” he says, taking a step back.
I follow him to the door and hold it open as he steps out into the cool night air that has me wrapping my silk robe around me tighter, as if it was helping anything anyways. 
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he assures me before shooting off into the sky. 
“I really wish you wouldn’t!” I shout into the air after him before slamming the door and locking it. 
I take a deep breath once I’m seated on my couch again, trying to salvage any sort of peace I might still have. But that tranquility was disappearing in my hands the more I chased it. 
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The following day I head to Rhys’ house to talk over the new adjustments in the Day Court trade agreements. It was supposed to be easy enough, but as things got more and more complex it ended up being an all day thing. By the time I walked up the steps to my own townhouse I was exhausted and starving. I wasn’t looking forward to bread for dinner as I had no time to go to the market today. 
I kicked open the door and locked it behind me, the smell of fresh tomatoes and basil wafted through the air causing me to pause in my tracks. Was Lucien here? Had him and Elain gotten in a fight or something?
“Ah shit!” I heard a male cuss followed by the searing of liquid on a burner. 
I curiously walk around the corner of the kitchen where I’m greeted with the sight of Azriel, standing in my apron, reading my cookbook and stirring some sort of sauce. His shadows were helping him turn the pages of the book. I see the spilled sauce on the burner that was the cause of his profanity just moments ago. 
“There you are,” he smirked, his eyes flitting up to mine before reading the book again. 
“Az what are you doing here?” I ask, setting my bag down on the table. 
“Making you dinner,” he said, gesturing to the numerous used pans and utensils lying around my once clean kitchen. 
I walk over to inspect what he’s cooking. Fresh herb crusted chicken cooks in the pan next to him while he stirs a red sauce. In the sink is cooked pasta sitting next to freshly sauteed green beans. I inhale the smell of the food deeply and I can’t help but feel myself salivate a little, it smells delicious. 
“You always dog ear the recipes you want to try but you never make them for fear of not liking them,” he says nonchalantly as he prods at the chicken. 
I look down at the cookbook he’s reading, sure enough the recipe he’s making has a bent corner. I had been itching to try it but had never found the time. 
“If you end up not liking it there’s take out from Rita’s in the ice box,” he said using the spoon to point to the ice box in the corner of the room.
I look up to fully inspect him. This all feels like a ridiculous practical joke. If someone had told me that my spymaster would be cooking me dinner I would’ve laughed in their face. Upon further inspection I realize he’s shirtless, save for my apron he’s wearing. 
“Was the half nudity necessary?” I cock an eyebrow leaning against the counter. 
Azriel barked out a laugh, “It took me a while to find the apron, I had gotten tomato juice on my shirt when I started chopping them up for the sauce so I took it off and washed it,” he explained the corner of his mouth turning up in a smirk. “Plus I figured the whole shirtless bit might win me more brownie points with you.” 
I rolled my eyes at his cockiness, I didn’t dare let him know how right he was. 
He laughed at my reaction, “Why don’t you go sit down, dinner’s almost ready.” he said gesturing to the couch. 
I shrugged my shoulders and padded my way over to my favorite reading spot. The one he found me in yesterday. I plop down on the velvet sofa and there in front of me on the coffee table, my book has been left open to the place I bookmarked and a glass of wine sits for me. I raise an eyebrow but decide to just roll with it, I pick up the book and sip on the wine, becoming engrossed with the story.
A few minutes later I feel the cold begin to bite at my toes. I look around for a blanket and see that the nearest one is across the room. I curse at the idea of having to move, but before I can even set my book down one of Azriel’s shadows is scurrying across the room to retrieve the knitted blanket for me. The wisp of darkness arranges the blanket neatly over my legs, tucking me in like a mother would her child.  I can’t help but laugh at the care the little thing is putting into the job. 
Azriel’s shadows looking out for me was nothing new, the second the bond clicked for me they tended to stay near me. Picking up pens and silverware I dropped on the floor and always twirling around my hair and wrists. There were even times they would try to drag Az near me, like on starfall and solstice, nights I looked especially beautiful. But he would always curse and wave them off until they left him alone. 
The little shadow perched itself on my shoulder as if it too wanted to read my book. I could sense it was trying to anticipate any other small need I might have. 
“You know he might be insufferable but you guys are pretty great,” I laugh looking at the curious being. 
In response the shadow boops itself on my nose as if it was giving me a kiss. 
“Don’t tell them that or they’ll get a big head,” Azriel murmurs behind me where he’s leaning against the doorway between the living room and the kitchen, still shirtless and wearing that damned apron.
“In that case I’ll be sure to praise them more often, they’re little angels,” I smile as the tendril of darkness dances around my collar. 
Azriel lets out a small chuckle behind me, “Dinner is ready,” he tells me before disappearing into the kitchen once more. 
I follow him as the small shadow frantically pulls at my wrist towards the table, as if it’s eager for me to see what it helped its master cook. When I walk into the darkened kitchen and find that Az has set the table not only with our dinner but with candles and another bouquet. This time it’s an arrangement of jasmine, no doubt from the florist down the street. 
I sit down and inhale the heavenly scent of the white flowers and hum in delight. Azriel comes in with a bottle of wine and two glasses, pouring us each a bit. He sees me admiring the flowers and smiles. 
“Jasmine, like your perfume,” he says, putting down the bottle and taking his seat next to me. 
I smile and look down at the plate before me. It looks delicious, the pasta is fragrant with basil, the chicken is cooked to perfection and the green beans are vibrant and green. I lift my fork and dig into the past first. The moment it hits my tongue the flavor melts in my mouth, rich, bold and oh so savory. I let out a moan as my eyes flit to Azriel who is watching me expectantly wondering if I’m going to like it or not. 
“This is incredible,” I say, covering my mouth with my hand so he doesn’t see me chewing. 
“Thank the cauldron I thought I put too much red pepper in,” he breathes out, seemingly relaxing before digging into his own plate. 
“No it’s perfect, thank you really,” I say earnestly. 
“You’re welcome,” he smiled, taking a bite of chicken.
We sit and eat our meals in silence simply enjoying the good food. A little shadow flitted up in front of my face to gauge my reaction to the bite of chicken I was chewing. I couldn’t help but laugh as it shifted like it was cocking its head at me. 
“Yes it’s very good, you did a wonderful job,” I laugh at the little fella. 
My giggle brings Azriel’s attention to me once again and before I know it he’s waving his hand at the little tendril like he’s swatting a fly. 
“Hey go away let her eat for the love of god,” he chastises as the shadow slinks back behind him. 
“Don’t worry it wasn’t bothering me,” I laugh taking another bite of green beans. 
“Yeah well they haven’t been listening lately,” he says looking back at the little shadow that had slinked behind his shoulder like a reprimanded child. 
I shake my head at the two of them interacting and take another sip of wine. To be honest I wasn;t really sure what to say to Azriel. Despite his valiant efforts to win me I still wasn’t ready to abandon the peace I had grown so fond of. 
“You know it’s funny,” he tells me, playing with the food on his plate. “I feel like my shadows have always liked you. It was like they knew before I did,” he laughed nervously at his confession. 
“Maybe so,” I shrug, not wanting to broach the subject, the friendlier we could make this the better.
“I can remember times when they would drag me into any room that had you in it. Most of the time I control them, but when it comes to you? They control me.” he laughs while taking a sip of his wine. 
“Thank you again for dinner,” I say, forcibly changing the topic of conversation. “It’s been a while since I had a home cooked meal. I think the local restaurants have my to-go orders memorized now.” I laugh. 
“Lucein used to cook for you didn’t he?” Azriel asks, and I can feel his eyes burning into the side of my head as I play with the pasta on my plate. 
“Yeah he did, he was a surprisingly good cook too,” I say, recalling the traditional Autumn Court meals he would cook all the time. They were mostly for him, for when he was feeling nostalgic, but he always left some for me as well. 
Azriel sits for a moment as if debating whether or not to say something for a moment. “Did you love him?” he asks. 
My fork clatters to the plate at the abrupt question and I’ve never felt so put on the spot. It was never something I had thought about in regards to the autumn court male. Love seemed like an emotion  that would be reserved for Azriel and Azriel alone, until one day it wasn’t. I didn’t love Lucien, but I certainly stopped loving Az in that way, or at least I think I did.
“No I didn’t” I say honestly turning to meet the shadowsingers gaze. “Lucien and I… it was never like that. We both knew what we needed for each other, it started as just sex. But then he would stay the night, and then we started going to breakfast. His shirts started showing up in the laundry hamper, his books on the coffee table. Eventually I just gave him a key, it seemed like the logical thing to do. We didn’t even label our relationship until he asked me to marry him.” 
“I wasn’t sure,” Azriel said, going back to shyly staring down at the table. “I overheard your conversation that one day. When you asked him about the possibility of having children. You said that you always pictured your children having wings, was that true?” he inquired. 
I nod shallowly, unable to trust my own words in such a raw moment. 
If Az had any other questions he didn’t ask them or press me to talk about the two of us, it was as if he was happy with the answers I did give him. He was perfectly content to let me finish eating my meal in comfortable silence. When I was finished he cleared the table and didn’t let me lift a finger to help clean. Instead those pesky shadows cornered me into reading my book once more. 
It wasn’t until a few minutes later that he came in, dressed in his shirt once more to bid me goodnight. He insisted that I stay in my comfortable spot by the couch as he walked himself out locking the door behind him. As the comfortable silence, which I had grown so used to, ensued, I found myself silently wishing he had stayed just a little longer.
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The following weeks were spent with little visits from shadows and shadowsingers. Sometimes it would be Azriel showing up at my door with coffee or gifts. Other times, when Rhys had Azriel on missions he would find ways to leave things at my doorstep. The first time it was another bouquet of flowers and then chocolates. 
My favorite gift from Azriel had been the books. The first set he got me was the second and third book in my series. They appeared at my door the morning after he made me dinner with a note that read…
I noticed that you were almost done with your book last night so I went out to get you the second book. I noticed it was a short book so I got you the third in case you finished it in one day like you no doubt will. 
-Azriel
Of course he was right and I finished the second book by the end of the day. When I opened the third, and much longer book, to begin reading it a bookmark fell out and another note. 
I figured you might need a bookmark for this one.
-Azriel
He was right about that as well. 
The next book to be delivered was a classic romance with certain pages, and quotes underlined. His notes scribbled in the margins. Clearly he had taken the time to read the novel himself. When I saw the first annotation I expected his further notes to be corny or cheesy, but each one was well thought out. 
The most recent literally delivery was a small and short book about different types of flowers. Between each of the pages sat a live flower that corresponded with the page. It was possibly the most vibrant and beautiful bouquet I had ever seen and by far my favorite floral gift I had received. 
This week though things had been different. As the colder months were drifting in I started spending more time inside, reading by the fire. But not once had Azriel stopped by. Not a present, not a note to be found. When I subtly asked Rhys were the shadowsinger was he told me he was in the isle of Hybern. 
A week had come and gone without so much as a tendril of a shadow to be seen. I sat infront of my roaring fire with a book in hand trying to escape the bitter cold. Outside the first snowfall of the year had taken the form of a blizzard. I pitied the shopkeepers that would have to walk home in it. 
Around midnight I heard the scraping of metal against stone from outside my house. I jumped out of my skin and quickly looked at the clock noting the late hour. I set down my novel to wrap myself in a blanket and pad over to the front door. I could already hear the winds outside and feel the cold air seeping in through the cracks in the door. 
I open the door to investigate the strange sound and I nearly gasp when I find Azriel outside my house shoveling my walkway with a small shovel from my garden. One meant for digging out plants and trees, not snow. 
“Az what are you doing?” I ask, making the spymaster jump a bit. 
“I’m shoveling your walkway. I didn’t want you to slip tomorrow morning or hurt your back trying to shovel it yourself,” he said, digging into the snow again with the little metal shovel. 
“Oh Az you don’t have to do that,” I coo walking out into the cold pulling my blanket tighter. 
“I don’t have to but I want to,” he said shoveling more snow. “It wouldn’t take so long if I had a bigger shovel.” he grunts, frustrated.
“Well why didn’t you take Rhys’ shovel?” I laughed watching as the overgrown Illyrain tried to mangle the tiny thing. 
“Well I just got back from Hybern, I saw it had snowed and I came here first.” he explained and my heart swelled. He had come to my place first before he even went home. “I figured if I didn’t do it you would fall and break your head open.” 
“Azriel, really you don’t have to do this, I can handle it,” I plead with him feeling bad that he’s subjected himself to the weather. 
He stops his shoveling and turns to look at me, “y/n I want to do this. Don’t worry about it.” he says before looking me up in down seeing that I’m in nothing but a short nightgown and a blanket. “Now go inside before you catch a cold.” 
“Me? What about you?” I laugh looking around at the snow falling around us. 
“I’m Illyrian the snow doesn’t bother me,” he retorts and I can tell that he’s lying by the pink in his cheeks from the cold.
“Well I’m half Illyrian,” I counter, swinging back and forth on my heels. 
“Then I’m sure half of you is really cold,” he rebuttals. “Now go back inside and get warm before I carry you inside myself.” he smirks before shoveling up another heap of snow. 
I just shake my head and retreat to the warm fireplace awaiting me. 
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I waltz into the House of Wind  where the Solstice party is in full swing. Lords from neighboring courts are chatting and drinking all around and from the corner of the room I can hear Cassian’s booming laugher as he doubles over at something Helion has said. 
Like almost every solstice party I arrive fashionably late. I truly never mean to be the last to arrive, but it feels like the whole guest list decides to arrive early just to spite me. I make my way around the area where couples and children are dancing to a small quartet and head toward the bar. My dress billows behind me like liquid starlight. Just like every solstice party before this one, I will get by with copious amounts of wine. 
I lean against the bar and watch as Elain and Lucien laugh and giggle across the room. I smile as Elain pops a pastry into Lu’s mouth and I can’t help but feel a warmness in my chest at the two of them. Lucien was finally happy with his mate, and if there was ever someone who deserved such happiness it was him. 
My thoughts are interrupted by a shadowy friend making its presence known. Flying up by my face to say hello and then rushing behind me as if it was called. I turn to see Azriel dressed immaculately staring at me. His eyes flit up and down my body taking in every detail of me.
“You look…” He trails off, shaking his head, as if the words he was going to say wouldn’t be the right ones. “There are no words. Even the poets would get it wrong.”
I can’t help but blush at his choice of words, taking a step toward him as the shadows behind me are pushing me to do so. 
“You clean up pretty good yourself, spymaster,” I chuckle giving him a once over.
He blushes and then speaks again, “I mean it, you look beautiful tonight y/n.” 
I blush again and turn my head to avoid his gaze, like that shade of hazel might burn me from the inside out if I look too long.
“You must allow me to dance with you,” he says, taking both our drinks and placing them on the bar. “Not having you out on that dance floor would be a disservice to everyone here.”
I laugh taking his outstretched hand and allowing him to lead me to the dancefloor, “Alright Az you’ve convinced me, but only because I know you won’t step on my feet,” 
We fall into a comfortable motion, swaying back and forth to the slow tempoed song the quartet is playing. The couples around us filter around us, some lost in deep conversation, some embraced closely swaying to the song. I keep my eyes on them, knowing that Azriel’s gaze is on me. 
Memories of a solstice much like this one float through my mind. The way my feet ached before Azriel saved me, sweeping me up into a dance. The way the bond felt when it snapped into place for me. I had pulled on it so desperately hoping he might feel it too. I thought of all the years of agony that followed that night. Watching Az fall for Mor and later on Elain. Hearing my brother and Cassian talking about Azriel’s exploits in bedding local women. All of it tore me apart and it took over 200 years to rebuild the part of me that I had lost. I wondered if I would ever be whole like that again. 
I hear Elain and Lucien’s laughter once more, the sound breaking me from my thoughts as Azriel and I continue to sway to the music. 
“They make a great couple,” Azriel’s deep voice rumbles through me. 
I smile watching Lucine place a kiss to his mates lips, “They really do,” I say with a lightness to my voice. 
“Do you think we’ll ever be like that?” He asks tentatively and my world comes crashing down. 
“Az,” I say and his face falls at the dismissal in my tone. 
“Why not y/n? Why can’t we have a shot like they can?” Azriel says starting to get upset.
As if on queue the song that the quartet is playing ends and I hear the musicians flipping through their sheet music to find the next song. I pull my hands out of Azriel’s and take a few steps back.
“I think it’s time for me to go,” I say calmly, trying not to let the damn of tears break. I swiftly move past him towards the door. 
“Y/n wait!” I hear him call out behind me but I’m already out the door, my tears falling down my face as I make my way back to that empty townhouse in the middle of the city. 
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The rain outside my house slams into the window violently. Spring has come early in Velaris and I wasn’t exactly upset about it. At least I wasn’t until this torrential downpour blew into town. I hadn’t seen rain like this in the Night Court for at least a hundred years now.
It’s been weeks since solstice and it seems that Azriel has finally taken the hint and left me alone. I hadn’t heard a peep from him since that dance. Not a flower, chocolate or shadow to be seen and while I should be happy about it I had never been sadder. After all the walls I put up trying to keep my peace it seemed that he had succeeded in breaking them down again. 
I sat by the fire staring down at the dancing flames, no book, not even a glass of wine or tea. Just me and my all consuming thoughts. Each one of them led back to hazel eyes and blue siphons. 
I jump at the sound of a fist pounding on my door. Pulling my sweater tighter to cover up my nightgown I walk over to investigate who would have the guts to stand out in this monsoon at this hour. When I open the door I find Azriel bracing his arms against the doorframe, out of breath like he ran here. His hair soaking wet and sticking to his brow as the rain pelted him. 
“Az?” I shout over the sound of rain. 
“I can’t go on like this any longer y/n, I won’t do it!” he shouts over the storm. 
“Az it’s pouring what are you-” 
“I love you y/n!” he shouts stopping me mid sentence. “From the moment I met you I knew. I wanted so badly to put my hands around your waist and kiss you. And if you’re wondering why that seems like such an adolescent dream it’s because that’s what we both were. I was 117 years old and  you were 115 and that’s all I wanted. I knew little of love, even less of lust. All I knew was that I wanted to kiss you,” he hollers over the sound of rain wiping the water from his eyes.
“I’ve made mistakes, and I’ve hurt you, but I swear to you I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you, because I love you. And I don’t care that you don’t love me too, because I love you y/n. I choose to love you!” he finishes and I can’t tell if it's rain falling from his eyes or tears that match my own. 
I choose to love you.
I take a shaky breath and take in the sheer desperation on his face, “I love you too Azriel,” I laugh feeling another tear slip down my cheek. 
He doesn’t waste a moment, stepping through my threshold and cupping my cheek to place a searing kiss on my lips. I melt into him, feeling his clothes soaking my own as my nightgown clings to my skin. His hands are on my waist, scarred and cold from the elements but still so intoxicating. My arms wrap around him pulling him further into the entryway. I hear him slam the door shut with his boot drowning out the sound of rain leaving only the music of our ragged breaths as he kisses me deeper. 
He pulls away to press his forehead to mine, his wet hair and skin causing drops of water to cascade down my own face. 
“I love you so much,” he breathes cupping my cheek to press a chaste kiss to my lips. “My mate.”
I pull him in deeper at the utterance of those two little words. I had waited 400 years for this male to kiss me, and this kiss right here? Well it made everything all the more worth it. 
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Epilogue: 5 years later
I stand outside on the lawn of the townhouse. My arms clutching around the sweater I’m wearing as the fresh spring air blows over my skin. My hands drift lower to the small bump of my stomach. 
I was only a few months pregnant and barely starting to show. Elain had told me that it would be a girl claiming she had seen it in a vision. I couldn’t have been more excited for Azriel to be a girl dad. 
“You’re doing it son!” I hear my mate call from the sky where he teaches our son to fly. 
“Dad, I'm flying!” the onyx haired child shouted as he flapped his wings to pick up some speed.
At first I was apprehensive of him learning to fly so early, even though it had always been a dream of mine to watch my children learn to fly. But Azriel had assured me that the youngster was more than ready, and after a few weeks of lessons here he was taking to the air like a natural. 
I look around at the townhouse behind me. It had seen some significant changes since the night Azriel stood in the rain and told me he loved me. The front yard was littered with toy swords and shields, and the outside had a fresh coat of paint. The inside had a room addition, a room for our son, Kai, and now we're adding another room for our daughter. All paid for by Rhys of course who was more than happy to give his nephew and niece everything under the sun.
My thoughts are interrupted by Azriel slamming into the ground before me. I turn to see him walking over to me with a smile on his face. 
“Az shouldn’t you be up there with him?!” I fuss looking to where our son swoops and dives through the air. 
Azriel laughs and picks me up bridal style, pressing a kiss to my lips. 
“It didn’t feel right being up there without my girls,” he smiled nodding to my bump. 
Without warning he took off into the sky meeting Kai up there. We must’ve spent hours flying around the city, stopping by every uncle and aunt's house to show them Kai’s new skill. Everything was perfect, and for the first time in my whole life, I finally knew peace.
(Do you guys want a smutty bonus chapter of what they did after he confessed his love???)
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