#granted groundhog day did it better

[vortian]

funny how some pieces of influential or iconic media is parodied soooo much in the children's media you grew up with, that later when an adult shows you the original thing you just end up bored and wondering why that adult is talking about the premise like it's new and interesting.

because the supposedly interesting set-up has already been so overplayed at you for most of your life, you cannot understand what's so fascinating about it besides being a more fleshed out version of a trope you're already extremely familiar with.

(this post is about my specific experience with groundhog day)

[afewproblems]

This feels like such a Steve song, you know? (Granted Groundhog Day did not come out until 1993 but let's just ignore that for now)

Like maybe piano player Steve based on my other post here, poured all his feeling and worries about being left behind by everyone he knows and loves into this song.

The kids will be finishing highschool soon and definitely don't need him to babysit anymore, his car was totalled in the earthquakes that nearly decimated Hawkins so he's no longer the party chauffeur, and Robin and Nancy are heading to college in the fall and Eddie has been talking about getting out of Hawkins since he woke up from the hospital and Steve?

Steve feels stuck.

So maybe he writes, he's never been a big writer before, it's always been difficult to connect ideas or find the words he wants, but something takes over on a random Saturday. He gets it all out in a matter of minutes and sits down at the lonely piano in his parents' living room.

They've left for good, his parents, the house is paid off and in his name, they won't be back for it.

He plays around, yelling out the brand new lyrics. Like it's a joke, like his voice doesn't echo around the empty halls and rooms, like it doesn't crack eventually.

He plays around until he has something resembling a little song.

He feels a little better.

He leaves the notebook on the closed piano lid and forgets about it.

Until Eddie picks it up on another random Saturday.

It's just the two of them, they talk and smoke in the yard, and bake a frozen pizza for the two of them. It's nice, quiet and calm. Something neither of them have had a lot of recently.

"Is this a poem Stevie?" Eddie asks with wide eyes, he's grinning but there is a flicker of surprise on his face, Steve scrambles to snatch the scribbler out of his hands but Eddie jumps onto the couch and holds his arms above his head while throwing a hand out to push at Steve's face.

"Give it back Eds it's not--"

"Its good, it's cool if it is a poem man, I didn't know you could write".

Steve steps back allowing Eddie's hand to fall away, "It's uh," he chews his lip and wills the blush that coats his ears and cheeks away, "it's actually a song".

Eddie stares at him as if he's never seen him before.

"Be still my beating heart, Harrington, you never fail to surprise the shit outta me!"

Eddie grabs his arm and leads Steve back to the piano, flipping up the lid with an excited snap.

"Can I hear it?" He asks, voice suddenly soft, as though he knows how big this is for Steve.

He hesitates, this is new territory for the two of them since they have been dancing around each other recently, and he's not entirely sure exactly how Eddie feels about him, and what if this---

"You don't have to, Steve, I don't want you to be all freaked out, about this. I won't say anything if this is like, a secret or something," Eddie backpeddles, flicking the lid shut and putting the scribbler back where he found it.

That cements it for him.

"Its not really a secret," Steve mumbles as he steps forward slowly and takes a seat at the piano bench. He slides over to the far side and looks at Eddie pointedly until the metal-head takes a seat beside him, "but I've only ever played for Dustin, he wanted to learn piano awhile back".

Steve takes the notebook once again and places it in front of him on the stand before shaking out his hands once.

And he plays. His voice is soft as he sings, matching the soft press of the keys, unsure of himself, how he sounds, how it all sounds.

Eddie is quiet until he's done, he's quiet even after Steve is finished.

"That's only the second time I've played it like, the whole way through," Steve mumbles as he reaches up to grab the scribbler. Eddie still hasn't said anything.

Fuck.

"Its stupid, I was just goofing around with something-"

He stops speaking at two arms wrap around him and he gets a face full of wild curls.

"Shut up Harrington, that was great, that was, fuck, you wrote that?" Eddie whispers into Steve's chest, it's muffled slightly but Steve catches every word.

He slowly raises his own arms to wrap around the other man and leans his head down to rest on Eddies, "yeah Eds," he says with a smile.

Eddie tips his head away slowly, giving Steve a chance to move his own out of the way, he holds Steve's gaze, arms still wraps around him loosely.

"You know you've got me Steve," Eddie says slowly, his brown eyes flick back and forth between Steve's own, "you're not alone, I mean".

Steve opens his mouth to agree, to nod and placate and sweep it away, under the rug again.

"And l know that just saying that doesn't mean anything," Eddie continues interrupting Steve's train of thought, "so I'll do my best to show you every damn day, if you'll let me".

It's a charged, this thing hanging between them, and Steve isn't quite sure what to do about it.

Luckily Eddie's never been one for fully thinking before doing.

He leans forward, his face so close that Steve can count his eyelashes and see the flecks of honey in his warm brown eyes. Eddie nudges Steve's nose with his own and kisses him.

Its soft, warm, Eddie tastes like pizza and weed and his lips are chapped but its perfect.

Eddie pulls away slowly, leaving himself in Steve's space, though his eyes are wide, nervous.

"Every, every day huh?" Steve manages after a beat, his heart racing in his chest, his hands itching to reach into Eddie's hair as this unamable thing between them barrels into something more.

"Yeah Stevie, and maybe I'll have to pick your brain for our next Corroden Coffen hit," Eddie whispers with a grin on his lips.

He meets Steve in the middle this time and swallows his laughs with another kiss.

[ragnarlothcat]

For the wip title game!! Nothing compares to you or if someone has beaten me to that, knows best !! I love hearing you talk about your fics 🥺🥺🥺

My neglected groundhog day fic!!! Can you believe that when I started it I thought I'd be done in a couple months? You won't believe how much I've thrown out since I started it. Fun fact: I wrote 40k words of it in the past tense before I realized present sounded way and better for a time loop fic and rewrote the whole thing and now I'm stuck in it forever (Anakin and I have a lot in common that way!)

Anyway, thank you! I wrote a few thousand words in August that I don't hate, I just need to finish all the scenes. I've got an Anakin and Padmé conversation that I'm struggling with 🤔 I think I fundamentally struggle to imagine an Anakin recovering from a breakup in a non-deranged fashion. So instead, here's Anakin badgering poor Rex for the millionth time. The poor guy really gets the worst of Anakin's unhinged ranting in this fic.

groundhog day 8

Anakin awakens to bright sunlight streaming through his window and a bitter taste in his mouth. He knows nothing has changed, that he’s still in the same day as always. He knew it the minute they cleared that warehouse and the Force remained frustratingly silent around him.

The Force is the reason he’s here, is the reason the world stays the same while Anakin struggles and rages against it, and yet it refuses to explain itself. It wants something from him, doesn’t it? Then why won’t it come out and say it? The Force grants him visions of his mother’s murder, but can’t spare a second to tell its son why he’s being punished?

It seems Obi-Wan isn’t the only one keeping secrets.

Are you saying you’ve never lied to me? Anakin hears, Obi-Wan’s voice a nagging, lecturing echo in his mind.

It’s not the same thing, Anakin says to himself, to the room, to the very Force that binds the universe together.

Obi-Wan, or the version of him that he hears whenever he’s doing something he knows Obi-Wan would disapprove of, is creating an equivalency that isn’t there.

He and Obi-Wan lived together for ten years. Anakin survived puberty alongside Obi-Wan. He should be thankful Anakin spent as much time lying as he did, because he can guarantee Obi-Wan wouldn’t have wanted to hear the truths of a teenage Anakin.

It’s just that he and Obi-Wan are supposed to be friends. Equals, now that Anakin’s been knighted, now that Anakin has a Padawan of his own. Anakin hasn’t had so many friends since joining the Jedi, but he had friends on Tatooine. He knows what friendship entails.

(Kitster never would have faked his own death in an elaborate attempt to save the Supreme Chancellor’s life.)

But Obi-Wan hadn’t trusted him with the details of his little deception. He had, in fact, deliberately misled Anakin for the sake of the mission. Anakin would never do that. He’d never keep anything that important from someone he cared for.

Anakin pads into the main room, something niggling uncomfortably in the back of his throat. There are different levels of secrecy, Anakin knows this. He’s had to keep missions quiet from Ahsoka, because Ahsoka is a child and cannot possibly be exposed to the depths of the galaxy’s sleaze.

Sometimes Anakin keeps things to himself, everyone does. But nothing like what Obi-Wan has.

Anakin would never betray him.

The Force feels tight around him, or maybe that’s just his own frustration, swirling around him like smoke. Anakin said that time would help him heal, and he meant it. He’s suffered so much loss during the war. So many men have died under his command. He feels each one like vibroblade to the chest. But he can’t linger on every death, on every tragedy, on every mistake that costs him—

He finds his bantha mug upside down again on the counter. He flips it over and strokes its ceramic fur and stares into its beady little eyes.

The other two are gone. Anakin’s bantha is all alone.

He puts it back on the shelf and frowns into the empty room.

The door chimes and Anakin hurries over to retrieve Rex. Obi-Wan got into his head last night, that’s all. Anakin knows he’s in the right, because what Obi-Wan did is inexcusable. His lie destroyed the foundation of their friendship, and for what?

Anakin opens the door and steps back to admit Rex, who takes in Anakin’s state of undress and destroyed rooms with his usual expression of vague concern.

“Rough night, General?”

Anakin sighs. “Is there another kind, anymore?”

“Sir?”

“Never mind.” Anakin grabs his shirt off the back of the sofa without looking and shrugs it on. “I have a question for you, Rex.”

“If it’s about why I’m here, you asked me—”

“No, I know you’re here to remind me about the council meeting. And I do appreciate that you keep coming out of your way.”

“Keep?”

“My question is this—come sit, Rex,” Anakin says, dropping to the sofa and gesturing at the chair across from him.

Rex sits, his armor creaking and his eyebrows drawn together.

“I want to talk to you about honesty, Rex. About keeping secrets.”

“Is this about General Kenobi?”

“No. Or, well.” It is and isn’t about Obi-Wan, like most things these days (this day?) “I do understand the need for secrecy sometimes. After all, at least 10% of our missions haven’t been sanctioned by the council.”

“Sir.”

“And I know sometimes you keep things from me.” At Rex’s baffled silence, Anakin presses on. “For example: you’ve been keeping the shameless and crude behavior of the 212th from me.”

The crease between Rex’s eyebrows grows more pronounced. “Which shameless behavior in particular?”

Is there more? Is he going to find sabacc cards printed with dirty pictures of his master?

No, he reasons, Cody would have burned those. “Their…affection for Obi-Wan,” Anakin says, avoiding any mention of Obi-Wan’s ass, lest Rex also become distracted. “And I don’t blame you. You knew I’d be upset, and you didn’t want me to strangle everyone in the 212th. I understand.”

Rex blinks. “I wasn’t deliberately keeping it a secret, sir, I just didn’t think it necessary to discuss.” He coughs and shifts. “Are you going to strangle everyone in the 212th?”

Anakin considers this for a moment, then shakes his head. He has a busy day ahead of him. “Maybe later. The point is, that’s the kind of secret that I understand. You’re loyal to your brothers, even when they’re being sleemos.”

“I don’t know about sleemos—”

“But you’d never betray them. You’re like me that way, Rex. You’d never, say, fake your own death and let Fives mourn you.”

Anakin knows Rex. Anakin trusts Rex. He’s seen the way he is with the other men, with Ahsoka, with Cody, even.

“I—” Rex takes in Anakin’s expression and sighs. “No, but if I were ordered—”

“Exactly.” Anakin folds his legs under him. “You understand the difference. You understand the value of honesty. Of friendship.”

Rex isn’t squirming, because soldiers don’t squirm. Even Anakin has mostly had that trained out of him by now.

But the way his eyes dart across Anakin’s face conveys the same idea. “I can’t comment on the nature of your friendship with General Kenobi,” Rex says, “but yes, I do agree that people should be honest with each other. Within reason.”

“Have I kept things from Obi-Wan?” Anakin asks, rhetorically, because Rex does not look eager to participate in this thought exercise. “Of course! But these were things he was better off not knowing, or that were none of his business. But he had the audacity to suggest that they were comparable, or even relevant.”

“Um,” Rex says.

“But if Obi-Wan, my perfect Jedi master” —with his perfect robes and his perfect hair— “is claiming we’re both equally dishonest, maybe I need to show him how wrong he is. I need him to see that I would never treat him the way he’s treated me.”

“I hesitate to bring this up, but you do have a meeting very soon.” Rex glances at the floor and then back up. “You aren’t even wearing shoes.”

Anakin grabs his boots and shoves them on, and then curses and puts them on the correct feet. Why is this bothering him so much? Who cares if Obi-Wan thinks Anakin’s keeping secrets? Even if he is, it’s not like that cancels out Obi-Wan’s betrayal.

And besides, Obi-Wan won’t even remember the conversation they had last night. He won’t remember their trip to the lower levels. His conversation with Ahsoka. The mugs.

Anakin straightens his tabards furiously and stands up. It doesn’t matter in the slightest.

“I’ll show him,” Anakin bites out. “I’ll show them.”

“Them?” Rex asks, standing too.

Them. Obi-Wan. The Council. The Force. Anyone who would even suggest that Anakin’s offenses are anywhere near what Obi-Wan has done.

If honesty is what Obi-Wan wants, what the universe wants, then honesty is what they’re going to get.

[fiftytwotwentythree]

Wellness Wednesday:

The Groundhog Day Diet

Sunday I officially started my Groundhog Day Diet (the same daily meal on repeat). Obviously the name of the diet stems from the 1993 Bill Murray film, but the month long challenge was more inspired by Morgan Spurlock's 2004 documentary, Super Size Me (a challenge to eat McDonald's for 30 days straight).

I settled on the following specific daily foods for the month:

Lunch:

Turkey & Swiss Sandwich, a Side of Baby Carrots, a Cup Peaches

Snack:

A Serving of Trail Mix

Supper:

Bowl of Soup and a Glass of Milk.

All ^that^ comes out to approximately 1,290 Calories.

Now, I didn't necessarily do this to keep better tabs on my calories - no - I merely did it to see if I could do it - or - better yet see how long before my tongue goes mad.

As well, I am hoping this "diet" will assist my pocketbook as I have planned out my meals, purchased a large majority of all my fixings, thus hopefully minimizing my grocery bill for the month of October. The only items I forsee having to purchase is fresh Turkey, Bread, Milk, and Carrots.

So far, 4 days in, things aren't too shabby. I wish I would have thrown in some popcorn to booster my snack intake... but... I'll know better for next time.

.

.

40th CHECK-IN:

Current Goals:

Lose 52 lbs

Completed as of 4/12/2023

New Goal: Maintain or Continue on The Weight Loss Path

Avoid "Junk Food"

Minimize Take-Out / Fast Food Consumption

Short Term:

Vegetarian-ish Diet: Completed

End Date: 4/09/2023 - 46 Days Total

Groundhog Day Diet:

10/01/2023 - 10/31/2023

Eat the Same Thing Each Day for 31 Days

*Not Photographed*

Turkey Deli Meat, Wheat Bread, Swiss Cheese, Milk.

.

.

Stats from August:

Food:

Leftover Meals: 20

Oranges: 20

Salads: 18

Bags of Popcorn: 17

Cans of Soup: 9

Take Out: 0

Candy/Sweets: 0

Workout:

Jumping Jacks: 12,800

Push-Ups: 3,200

Glute Bridges: 3,200

Reverse Leg Lifts: 3,200

Leg Kickbacks: 3,200

Sit-Ups: 3,200

Squats: 800

Plank (mins): 160 mins

Assisted Push-Ups: 0

Weight Loss:

Weightloss This Month: -1.0 lbs

Average Weightloss per Week: -0.25 lbs

Total Weightloss: -85.6 lbs

Entertainment:

Movies Watched: 19

Favorite from the Month:

They Cloned Tyrone

"TV":

Hours of Television Watched: ~ 40 hours ( How To with John Wilson, Modern Family, Outer Banks, Ink Master, Muscles & Mayhem, Only Murders in the Building, Ms. Marvel, Detriot Lions vs KC, Detroit Lions vs Atlanta, Detroit Loins vs Green Bay)

Books:

Books Completed This Month: 0

Book Title(s) Completed This Month: -n/a-

Book Total for the Year: 2

Comics:

Comics Completed: 4

Trades Completed: 7

Comic/Trade Titles Completed:

Lumberjanes Vol. 1

Amazing Spider-Man Masterworks Vol. 1 (Marvel Masterworks)

Chew Vol. 3: Just Desserts

Deadpool by Skottie Young Vol. 2: Good Night (Deadpool (2018-2019))

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The IDW Collection Vol. 3

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Saturday Morning Adventures (2022-2023) #1

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Saturday Morning Adventures (2022-2023) #2

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Saturday Morning Adventures (2022-2023) #3

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Saturday Morning Adventures (2022-2023) #4

New X-Men by Grant Morrison Vol. 1: E Is For Extinction (New X-Men (2001-2004))

Spider-Man/Deadpool Vol. 0: Don't Call It A Team-Up (Spider-Man/Deadpool (2016-2019))

Favorite Comic/Trade Read:

Deadpool by Skottie Young Vol. 2: Good Night (Deadpool (2018-2019))

Magazine(s):

Magazine(s) Completed: 0

.

.

Meal Tracker:

THURSDAY

Lunch:

(2) Hotdogs

Individual Cup of Bob Evan's Macaroni and Cheese

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

Snack:

Bag of Ranch Corn Nuts

Bag of BBQ Corn Nuts

(4oz) Bag of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Vanilla Flavored Cashews Glazed Mix

(4oz) Bag of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Flavored Pistachios Glazed Mix

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

Supper:

Can of Progresso Creamy Tomato with Penne

- 10 Crackers

(2) Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

(1) Glass of Chocolate Milk

(2) Small Oranges

FRIDAY

Lunch:

Bowl of Leftover White Chicken Chili

- 10 Crackers

(1) Grilled Cheese Sandwich

Snack:

Bowl of Wonderful's Shelled Sweet Chili Pistachios

(4oz) Bag of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Vanilla Flavored Cashews Glazed Mix

(4oz) Bag of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Flavored Pistachios Glazed Mix

Supper:

Individual Cup of Bob Evan's Macaroni and Cheese

SATURDAY

Lunch:

Skillet Chicken Quesadilla

- Leftover Chicken

- Busch's Taco Fiesta Black Beans

- Uncle Ben's Spanish Rice

- Shredded Mild Cheddar

- Good & Gather's Queso Blanco

- Side of Sour Cream mixed with Herdez's Street Taco Rojo and Verde Sauce

Snack:

(2) Individual Bags of Sahale Snacks Pomegranate Vanilla Flavored Cashews Glazed Mix

(2) Individual Bags of Smartfood's White Cheddar Popcorn

(1) Glass of Pumpkin Spice Flavored Milk

Bag of Black Jewel Popcorn

(1) Colorado Peach

Supper:

(2) Skillet Quesadilla

- Leftover Chicken

- Leftover Busch's Taco Fiesta Black Beans

- Leftover Uncle Ben's Spanish Rice

- Shredded Mild Cheddar

- Good & Gather's Queso Blanco

(1) Glass of Pumpkin Spice Flavored Milk

SUNDAY

Lunch:

Turkey & Swiss with Toasted Wheat Sandwich

(5) Baby Carrots

(1) Cup of Del Monte Peaches

Snack:

Serving of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Supper:

Can of Progresso Lasagna Style Soup

- 10 Crackers

(1) Glass of Milk

MONDAY

Lunch:

Turkey & Swiss with Toasted Wheat Sandwich

(5) Baby Carrots

(1) Cup of Del Monte Peaches

Snack:

Serving of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Supper:

Can of Progresso Lasagna Style Soup

- 10 Crackers

(1) Glass of Milk

TUESDAY

Lunch:

Turkey & Swiss with Toasted Wheat Sandwich

(5) Baby Carrots

(1) Cup of Del Monte Peaches

Snack:

Serving of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Supper:

Can of Progresso Lasagna Style Soup

- 10 Crackers

(1) Glass of Milk

WEDNESDAY

Lunch:

Turkey & Swiss with Toasted Wheat Sandwich

(5) Baby Carrots

(1) Cup of Del Monte Peaches

Snack:

Serving of Good & Gather's Tex Mex Trail Mix

Supper:

Can of Progresso Lasagna Style Soup

- 10 Crackers

(1) Glass of Milk

.

.

Workouts:

THURSDAY

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

FRIDAY

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(10) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(10) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

SATURDAY

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

SUNDAY

* Afternoon Workout *

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

* Evening Workout *

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

MONDAY

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

TUESDAY

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges [4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

WEDNESDAY

(400) Jumping Jacks [8 sets of 50]

(100) Glute Bridges[4 sets of 25]

(100) Push-Ups [10 sets of 10]

(100) Reverse Leg Lifts [10 sets of 10]

(100) Leg Kickbacks [10 sets of 10]

(100) Sit-Ups [5 Sets of 20]

(5 min) Planks [5 Sets of 1 min]

.

.

WEIGHT TRACKER:

Starting Weight (Noon, 1/01/2023): XXX.X lbs

Weight at Last Check-In, 9/27/2023: -0.8 lbs

Weight As of Noon, 10/04/2023: +1.0 lbs

Total Weight Loss: -84.6 lbs

.

.

Closing Thoughts:

The Good:

Had an opportunity to take PTO in the middle of the work week. Using it for some R&R.

The Bad:

I quasi wish I included a daily bag of popcorn in to my Groundhog Day Diet... You Live and You Learn.

Gained a pound - which put be under 85 pounds of weight loss.

The Ugly:

I have insane pain in my lower leg/shin. Been icing my leg throughout the day.

[cjbolan]

Further thoughts after finishing Emily Windsnap and the Tides of Time...

*WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD*

This book’s biggest weakness is that it’s the most predictable. It’s the plots of 13 Going on 30, Groundhog Day, Cinderella 3: A Twist in Time,  Everything Everywhere All At Once, MCU’s What If…? all rolled into one. The ending is very reminiscent of Puss In Boots: The Last Wish, with the MCs happily destroying a magic wish-granting item. Funny coincidence I finished at after just watching Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, another series finale about time travel. Granted some scenes took me by surprise. Especially the third act after Emily’s 2nd wish...

Like all the books after Book 3, this one had some serious retconning, some bad and some good. Some bad retconning with 0 explanation (like Emily attending Brightport after all that drama about which school she’d attend), retconning was my biggest issue with the entire series. But also some good intentional retconning with an explanation (Emily’s mom marrying Mr. Beeston because of her first wish, Neptune acting nicer than usual because he was convinced everyone would save his oceans).

NEPOTISM SAVES THE DAY XD. No seriously Emily’s classmates save the day by just using their parents’ connections. Granted those classmates work hard too. Makes we wonder what if Emily’s parents were involved in the art project and how they could have helped.

This last book is just like the first book in all the best ways. It returns to the same locations, same recurring characters, new memorable and crucial characters to the plot, the focus on female friendship, our heroes saving the day with their wits and teamwork (and nepotism XD ) instead of magic when they could’ve easily used magic. Also Emily’s parents’ romance is the main romance. Furthermore it ends with Emily wanting just one small personal goal (meeting her dad in the 1st book, keeping her friends in the last book), which inadvertently solves much bigger goals at the same time.

Liz Kessler’s ending breaks the British children’s literature trope of evil schools. As an educator I love that! She leaned hard into that trope for most of this story, with Emily’s school being boring in the present then a creepy dystopia in the future. Until the ending where Emily unites Brightport Junior High and Shiprock School to create a living art display that might stop the 2 futures from happening.

Also as an artist I loved the idea of art changing the world and saving the day in the end. This part especially hit home for me who draws tons of Emily Windsnap fanart. That fanart certainly changed my life for the better: by introducing me to many other fans and even inspiring their fanart too. If fanart can change our lives, it could certainly change the world.

This last book was surprisingly grounded in reality. I like how well Liz Kessler writes about real-world adult matters (gentrification, pollution, homelessness, etc,) from the perspective of a child. Emily doesn’t fully know what’s going on, but she knows enough that it’s a bad situation that she has to solve. It’s a nice break from the previous books’ massive infodumps of exposition on fantasy worldbuilding and magic usage.

What happened to Emily’s mom when the spring tide turned? We saw Mandy being human was in big trouble when that happened, the last we see of Emily’s mom was that she’s still on the riverbank with Emily’s dad. Guess we have to hope for the best that Emily’s mom got out on time, or Emily’s dad saved her Little Mermaid-style.

Who else was a little creeped out at adult Emily sniffing her dad? Sniffing people can be cute when you’re a kid, but when you’re an adult...in media that’s typically to depict sexual desire 0_0. Does Emily have an Electra Complex? Because in her adult body she sniffs her dad multiple times...

Also he smells like “salt water and sandy skin”. Gross. I get Emily’s a mermaid probably used to that smell, but what about Emily’s mom? Did living with him make her nose-blind? How do y’all think humans react to Jake’s “salt water and sandy skin” smell XD?)

I wish Mr. Beeston had a bigger role in the story. He was a pretty prominent character until after the 1st future, then he just disappears. A pity because he’s one of my favorite characters. Maybe he’s the one who invited Neptune to the “living art display”.

Love how nonchalant Brightport is about the merfolk next door. Shows how quickly the novelty of merpeople wore off. And more importantly how the Windsnaps’ efforts in Book 4 to unite the two worlds ultimately paid off. I do LOVE how this book ended with the people of Brightport and Shiprock not just getting along, but also actively working together. I really wanted Book 6 to show more of that.

I liked the idea that greed was the core conflict putting Brightport and Shiprock at odds. Not just the obvious corporate greed like Midas Enterprises, but also Neptune squeezing every last penny out of an impoverished Brightport. It’s a clever way of showing that it’s not all humans’ fault, a direction I thought this book was heading towards. For a story about 2 societies at odds, it wouldn’t be fair for only 1 society to have to improve. 

The cycle of merman-meets-human romance continues XD!! From Mary/Jake, to Neptune/Aurora, to Archie/Millie, Mr. Finsplash/Ms. Platt...now Shelly/Drake? During the climax there’s a hint of romance between this Shiprock merboy and Brightport girl (“Shelly smiled shyly at Drake.”) . I sincerely believe Emily Windsnap started the merman/human romance trope i pop culture. Because all other examples I can think of came after this one (Namor/Shuri, Elisa/The Asset, Mabel/Mermando, etc.)

That’s all I got for now. That’s the end, reading this series was a fun ride. But this isn’t the end of my Emily Windsnap posts. I now have a lot more to think and post about regarding this series.

 Live long and prosper, Emily! You’ll always be a big part of my life.

[bmaxwell]

Top 10 Games of 2022

2022 was a hell of a good year for games. I had a hard time whittling my list down to just 10 games. It was a particularly good year for strategy RPG’s and wordy-talky games. Much to my surprise, I spent more time on my Nintendo Switch this year than anything, mostly thanks to finally taking the plunge on Xenoblade Chronicles. 

Xbox Game Pass continues to be a great value, and I played several games on it I would have otherwise missed. Many people bemoan the lack of AAA first party releases on Game Pass (which is fair), but that’s not me. Signalis, Power Wash Simulator, Citizen Sleeper, Beacon Pines, Shredder’s Revenge, and NORCO were all Game Pass titles for me. I can’t complain. 

On the flip side, I’ve become more wary of Early Access gaming - mostly because I tend to play a lot in early access, then when the game reaches its 1.0 release I sometimes have a “Been there, done that” feeling toward it. 

It was also a very down year for PlayStation. I played The Quarry there, and Valkyrie Elysium. I know Final Fantasy XVI and Final Fantasy 7 Reunited or Rehydrated or whatever the second one is called - I know those games are coming. For now though, it’s a little bare. Their reworking of PlayStation Plus ended up confusing and underwhelming as well. Better times are ahead. 

On to the games!

10. NORCO

Norco tells the story of a young woman returning to her hometown of Norco, Louisiana after her mother’s death. It’s a pixel art, point and click adventure game about...well at its heart it is about solving a mystery, but it’s about a lot of things. It’s about terminal illness. It’s about capitalism and the communities of people who fall through the cracks. It’s about strange lights in the Louisiana bayou, prophets, and powerful otherworldly beings. It’s about family trauma and forgiveness. It’s about eating a bad hotdog and desperately shitting inside a limousine. 

Norco is bizarre, clever, touching, funny, desperate, and brilliant. And greater than the sum of its parts.  

9. I Was a Teenage Exocolonist

This game was a long shot for me. I don’t like the look of it at all, the cardplay is too simple to be of interest, and it’s a story about living in space. I don’t remember who recommended it to me, but I’m glad they did because the writing is wonderful. You play as a child in a colony on a newly settled planet, with the story taking place from the ages of 10-20 years old. You pass time by doing activities such as attending classes, helping out in the daycare area, working in the geoponics center, training for the defense force, or working as a lookout. 

These will often have associated events that are resolved with a simple card game, and major life events grant you more cards. In my first play, my character was great with biology and animal knowledge, and fell in love with the girl working in the biology lab. Long story very short, I ended up inadvertently playing a role in the development and deployment of fungal contagion that wiped out most life on the planet. Whoopsie. 

A second playthrough gives you some chances to intervene on events you remember from the first game, a la Groundhog Day. The writing is smart and thoughtful, and the game has stayed with me in the weeks since completing it. 

8. The Quarry

A few years back my wife, firstborn child, and I enjoy playing “Choices Matter” games together. We’ve gone through Detroit: Become Human, Life is Strange: True Colors, and Little Hope as couch coop experiences. We started Until Dawn a few years ago, but it was a little too much “horny teens” for firstborn to play with his parents at the time. Now he’s older and that stuff is a lot less awkward for us, so when The Quarry came around, I picked it up. 

And we had a freaking blast with it. We were responsible for a few characters each. The story revolves around a group of camp counselors staying over for one last night after the kids are gone at the end of summer. Bad shit starts happening of course, and you’re left to figure out what exactly is happening and why, and what to do about it. Oh, and also don’t die. It’s a fail forward game (which I love) so when something bad happens, the story keeps going rather than presenting you with a Game Over screen. 

The story is good campy fun, the mystery was satisfying, and voicework and visuals are great. Seeing how the other players respond to situations is always fun. We were doing great until the last chapter where we lost a few of our campers, but we still found the wrap-up satisfying. 

7. Mario + Rabbids: Sparks of Hope

2017′s Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle was a near miss, but full of promise. Sparks of Hope delivers on that promise, building on the previous game in meaningful ways. The word I keep coming back to with Sparks of Hope is Freedom. You have a team of Marios and Rabbids, but they all level up at the same rate so there’s no worry about your least favorite characters falling behind. As you gain levels you can assign points in unlocking and powering up new abilities. Those points can be refunded and redistributed without penalty. You discover little Rabbid star people called Sparks along the way, and each character in your team can be assigned two of these - they grant elemental powers, extra dash attacks, invisibility, and lots of other stuff. This gives your characters strong customizability in ways that felt game-breaking at times, but was fun as hell. 

My Rabbid Mario was an unholy terror who could lure enemies to him and wipe most of them out in a single strong attack. He was also the best character in the game, thanks to voice acting that made me laugh a few times. Rabbid Rosalina with her strong disinterest in everything happening around her was fun too. In fact, the Rabbid characters generally felt more interesting and entertaining than the Mario ones. Except for Edge. Edge is basically “What if Cloud Strife was a Rabbid?” - just unlikable and lame as hell. Were the devs in on the joke or am I supposed to think she’s cool? I’m still not sure.

Going back to freedom in the design, the combat got a major overhaul from the first game too - specifically, your characters can move anywhere within their range as much as they want until they’ve taken their 2 actions. You can also freely swap between your characters until your turn is over. This lets you cook up strategies and change your mind on the fly if something isn’t going to work out. This means there are always several ways to attack a given situation, and the way things play out is often dumb and great. Huge chain reactions of explosions taking out bunches of baddies, or popping enemies up in the air so Mario and Luigi can snipe them were some of the favorite moments in the game. I couldn’t ask for anything better out of a game with Rabbids in it.

6. Tactics Ogre Reborn

Final Fantasy Tactics is one of my favorite games ever made. I’ve never played its predecessor Tactics Ogre in any form though. Reborn is an update of the 2010 PSP title Tactics Ogre Let Us Cling Together, which itself is an update of the original Tactics Ogre game from 1995. As a fan of FFT, I can immediately see the lineage with that game. The tone and music feel immediately familiar, as do the themes of war and the common folk caught in it. Reborn deals in shades of grey more than FFT does, and I frequently found myself pitted against people who did not feel villainous. 

Also unlike FFT, there are some story choices to be made in Tactic Ogre Reborn, and these choices will affect major parts of the narrative. The game’s design does show its age (being nearly 30 years old at this point). For example, I hope you like navigating menus and checking everyone’s equipment and abilities. A lot. Like, a LOT. The whole thing crumbles if the battle doesn’t hold, and thankfully it still feels great. The difficulty hit a sweet spot for me where I often found myself just scraping by, pulling out a win after it felt like hope was lost. 

I found myself doing Just One More Battle several times with this game, a testament to how fun the combat is. I miss the deep class customization of FFT, but my roster here was varied enough that it never bothered me.  As I’ve been working on this list, every time I see Tactics Ogre Reborn at number 6, my gut reaction is “What? That’s too fucking low!” then I stare at the games above it and think “Yeah no, it’s six. I’ll be damned.” I have no doubt that if I’d played this game in its day in the late nineties, it would be one of my favorite games ever made. 

Six is too low. 

5. Citizen Sleeper  

Sometimes, a game is appealing to me but asks me to put some effort into learning it. Depending on the game and my headspace that day, I might just say “fuck it” and put it down. I almost did that with Citizen Sleeper. The gameplay is, at its core, an action drafting game where dice determine your available options. In my boardgaming days, I’d be all about it. I didn’t sign up for that though, this was a videogame that was asking me to learn this system before being really bought into any of it.

But I’m a big brave dog, so I pushed through and learned it (it’s really not so bad). My reward was a special game, one that will stay with me for a very long time. Citizen Sleeper places you in the role of an android, a synthetic life form whose consciousness was copied from a human. A corporation pays the human for this, they get a worker (you), and the human gets a sum of money. You are property, a thing with no rights of any kind. If you try to run, you’ll soon cease to function without regular injections of a drug (produced only by the corporation who owns you). 

In Citizen Sleeper you are an escapee, a stowaway trying to figure out how to survive on a space station. You need shelter, you need work, you need your injections, and there’s a bounty on your head. As your health deteriorates, you have fewer dice available to you (and thus can perform fewer tasks in a given day). If your dice rolls are lower, you may not be able to perform some tasks very well (low rolls aren’t always bad though). The mechanical parts of the game are there to service the story and writing, which are fantastic

The game mirrors being an outcast with a chronic illness very, very well. You need your meds to survive, so you need to earn money but some days it’s very difficult or impossible to make that happen. Some folks might help, some might not care, some may try to take advantage of you. Without going into too much detail, the game world offered hope in the form of community (in my playthrough anyway). When the systems in place fail us, we must rely on each other. 

I fully plan on playing the game again after they’re done updating it. Citizen Sleeper was another game from this year that is going to stay with me.

4. Triangle Strategy

I’ve played a LOT of strategy RPG’s since Final Fantasy Tactics, always chasing the dragon. Not many scratch that itch but, despite the stupid name, Triangle Strategy is the best SRPG I’ve played since FFT. My only real complaint with the game is how slowly it starts. They really front load the first couple of hours with exposition dumps, doling out a story of a war torn nation and kingdoms competing for resources before you’re invested in anything. I can’t blame anyone who bounces off early. And initially I was disappointed by the lack of deep customization options with your characters.

But the more I played, the less that bothered me. My characters felt distinct from one another, and even the oddball classes were genuinely useful - something I can’t say for FFT. By the end, my A-team had a juggler, a builder, and mathematician on it. The combat here is tight, and the difficulty once again hit a sweet spot for me. I could get through most combats on the first try, and the game gives XP in losses so it always felt like some progress was made even in defeat. I enjoyed the combat enough that I did all of the optional training battles. 

The more I played the game, the more I got invested in the story. The game gives you these decision points where you talk to your team and decide how best to proceed. You can try to sway people one way or the other, but you need to have talked to some people between battles and be able to make a convincing argument. The game tracks morality and other metrics in the background, and some characters will only be recruitable under certain conditions. There are multiple endings as well, and this is another game I plan on playing through again to see what I’ve missed (though my canonical ending is #TeamFrederica).

3. Marvel’s Midnight Suns 

Well, I didn’t count on this. I wasn’t sold on the game until I heard an interview with developer Jake Solomon. I’m not especially a fan of comics or superheroes, but I loved his passion for the source material. And I’m a strategy RPG guy (though XCOM has always been a miss for me). A couple of weeks ago I was seriously considering this for my game of the year and pondering my own possible recency bias. 

Midnight Suns is not my game of the year, but goddammit I was absolutely hooked on this game from start to finish in the “I wonder if I can squeeze a mission in before I have to leave for work” way. The best comparison I have for this game’s design is Fire Emblem Three Houses. That is, you go out on missions that are decided by turn-based combat, then you come back to your home base where you run around talking to your teammates, building relationships and doing some light crafting and collecting. I enjoyed it here enough that it made me retroactively like Three Houses a little less.

It has the Hades “problem” where I love both the combat and the exploration/talky bits so much that there’s no natural stopping point for me. I’m excited to do the next mission and, when that’s done, I’m excited to explore the abbey and talk to people and do my upgrades. It’s another “I was going to take a break 3 hours ago” game for me. And as someone with no real knowledge or expectation of these superheroes, I enjoyed the writing and ended up liking all of them in their own way by the end. Even the protagonist - a wholly new superhero made for the game - felt like more than just a blank slate. Each hero feels distinct in battle, with just enough customization to tweak their playstyles to your liking, but not so much that it’s overwhelming. 

They struck a great balance with the game. For the second year in a row a Marvel game is one of the very best releases of the year. You win, universe. 

2. Xenoblade Chronicles 3  

More than anything, 2022 was the year of Xenoblade Chronicles for me. I played the first one for the first time and loved it, immediately bought the second and loved it more, and bought Xenoblade Chronicles 3 at release. It somehow managed to be even better than its predecessors, and one of the best games I've ever played. 

It does the best version of the things I want from a JRPG. The combat system is complex and satisfying. There’s a class system where you’re unlocking new classes and swapping between them as you wish. The story is heartfelt and serious, but not afraid to lighten things up in the downtime. You get a ragtag cast of characters who start off as enemies and over time grow to tolerate each other and eventually form unbreakable bonds. They band together to overcome impossible odds with the POWER OF FRIENDSHIP.

Each member of the team has to deal with their own personal baggage and trauma, and each grows as a character over the course of the story. The world is oppressive and heavy, and I fell in love with my misfit crew by the end of the Xenoblade Chronicles 3′s ~100 hour runtime. The ending lived up to the rest of the game (which does not always happen). Also, Sena is best girl and additionally she is the girl with the gall. 

1. Elden Ring  

What can I say about Elden Ring?

Despite many attempts, it’s the first FromSoft Game that landed for me. The easiest thing I can point to is the open world design of the game. Where previous soulsborne games would funnel the player into a handful of narrow paths, Elden Ring’s world is VAST. Seriously. It inspired a sense of awe in me that I don’t often feel. I knew the game world was big, but it just kept going. Going underground and learning that there’s a whole additional map was jaw-dropping for me. 

FromSoft somehow managed to make the world feel massive and vast, but still chock full of secrets that feel organic and satisfying. Several times during my playthrough, I’d see something cool off in the distance and think “Oh, I’ll pop over there and check that out!” only to find that the cool thing was a LOT further away than I initially thought. I’ve played games where it feels like the developers sprinkled a handful of icons over the map in the name of padding out the game’s play time (looking at you, Ubisoft). That’s not the case here. There is weird, cool shit to find everywhere, and it never feels cluttered or forced. Even when the reward was a piece of gear that my character was unable to use, I never felt like my time was wasted. 

While the graphical fidelity might not be on the level of games like Horizon Forbidden West, the art design is breathtaking. So much of Elden Ring inspires curiosity and exploration; I went deep underground and there’s a starry sky down there!? The world’s towering golden trees act as beacons in the game’s otherwise harrowing, crumbling world. There is a melancholy beauty to this game that really struck a chord with me. 

The game’s combat is fantastic as expected, and the ability to fuck off to somewhere else whenever I was frustrated with a boss or a location is what allowed a schlub like me to enjoy and finish the game. For a couple of months my buddies and I were consumed by Elden Ring, swapping screenshots and stories and lore findings. It feels like the game of the generation to me and, as great as many other releases were this year, I just couldn’t not name Elden Ring my game of the year. 

[darkysilverwing]

So imagine Groundhog Day, the movie with Bill Murray in it where he's stuck in a time loop. He can be shot, stabbed, burned to death, and he wakes up just fine. That's the scenario I'm kinda living in, only time keeps going for me.

I don't know what happened when I turned 20, but when I turned 25 I was walking down the stairs in socks, carrying a big plate of mashed potatoes. I ended up slipping down the stairs and breaking my neck, next thing I know I'm sitting at the bottom of the stairs, perfectly fine, as a matter of fact i'm feeling better than fine! All the way until I turn around and see my own dead body, head twisted at a sickening angle, a bit of blood dribbling out of the mouth, it was... intense...

I'm honest enough to admit that I threw up, I still can't look at creamed corn the same way, but shortly thereafter one of my friends popped by unanounced for a visit, only to find me standing over my own corpse.

Cue about an hour of us both freaking out, Followed by a little bit of a struggle as they assumed I was just a lookalike trying to steal their life or something cause they were a bit of a conspiracy theoriest, it took one sharp blow against the coffee table to disprove their point as I apparently appeared right next to them in a flash of light.

A few more questions later they decided to help me bury the bodies in the back yard cause there is no way in hell the police were going to be called for this, what would I even say? what would happen if I got the death sentence and then just appeared next to my dead body? No it was just seen as a lot simpler to just bury the bodies and never let anyone see.

That was almost 150 years ago.

I did manage to die of old age once, back in the 60's, my grandson had just returned from the war missing a few fingers and an eye, but otherwise alive and well, he held my hand and cried as I slipped into the abyss, only to instantly become furious when turning in the hospital to see some 20 year old kid standing behind him. He instantly assumed that I was some long lost grandkid from some sorted affair, which was easy enough to spin as true, just had to fake a letter, which was easy since I had the same handwriting.

Only downside being the fact that I also ended up the perfect age to get drafted.

I'll be honest, I don't remember too much of what happened in the war, spent too much of it dead, my platoon called me Catboy cause they assumed I had 9 lives. So many stories floated around of them me stepping on a landmine and getting lucky by jumping into a nearby, hidden ditch, or falling into a punji pit and missing every spike.

Soon enough they took it for granted that I was somehow just lucky, which was great cause they never questioned when i got shot, or poisoned or burned or whatever else was thrown at us, I'd always end up back at camp without a single scratch on me.

Granted there were a few days where I hated my abilites, watching my best friend get stabbed and slowly bleed out with no way of me to stop it wasn't great, and I've never actually figured out what caused my abilities to manifest. It wasn't genetic cause none of my family seemed to have it, and it wasn't chemical cause I've done my fair share of studying the physical sciences and I've found no deviation from the norm in my body. Only thing I can think of is either it's fucking magic or science hasn't caught up to what I am yet.

I think the worst part is thinking of the implications though, like back when everyone was afraid that russia was going to nuke us I was worried about how being the only human left alive would affect me, how much succumbing to radiation sickness over and over again would suck, how the entire earth could be covered in a thick layer of my corpses before I stay alive enough to foster a bit of a life.

I even asked one particularly confused butcher on the best types of dishes that could be make just using the body parts of an animal, with no herbs or spices, and I did learn how to make bone bread so I guess I could always just eat my own dead body over and over again if it really came down to it.

Thankfully things did seem to clear up around the turn of the century. Tech started innovating like crazy, people started becoming much more connected, and sure, things ended up being a lot more visible so the world seemed to start getting worse but in all honesty crime's been dropping for decades, you just see more of what's actually happening.

And that's where we reach today, where once again I was carrying a plate of mashed potatoes down the stairs in socks. You'd think I'd learn my lesson after all these years but I guess not.

Looks like I gotta find the shovel again.

[giorno-plays-piano]

Silly things you say

Pairing: Todoroki Shoto x pro hero!Reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, implied stalking, kidnapping, forced marriage.

Words: 1265.

Summary: Now Shoto knew he was just too young to understand what you meant; people said girls were maturing mentally earlier than boys, and that was probably true. You were so right about him. He was way better than the majority of men - and Heroes, too.

_______________

He remembered that day well. Even when Todoroki Shoto was in his teenage years he wasn't too sensitive, really, but that afternoon his heart was beating so fast as if he had just run a marathon. It was the day he finally decided to ask you out.

Despite belonging to the Department of General Education, you actually had a peculiar Quirk that made you able to control emotions of others. Shoto wasn't sure if that was because of your Quirk but he always felt a little better when you were around. You had an air around you that felt strangely comforting. Maybe it was the reason why he was attached to you a little more than to other girls, that what he used to tell himself. Thinking of it now made Shoto chuckle.

That afternoon he wanted to ask you to come to the city on Sunday with him. It was rather awkward, but he had never really done it before with a girl. Did he expect you to reject him because of this? No, he didn't. Not that Shoto was so full of himself he expected everyone to love him, but he somehow believed you'd go with him that time. He believed you'd give him a chance.

"I guess you're really gonna become a total husband material, but I'd prefer spending my youth with bad guys. It more fun that way." You sent him a cheeky grin and turned away before he had time to say anything in return. Actually, it was meaningless anyway: Shoto was at loss for words.

He couldn't understand what you meant and decided you just said something really stupid. Husband material? Seriously? What the hell was that supposed to mean? Besides, when it turned out you dated Tetsutetsu of all people, it didn't make sense to Shoto at all. You just weren't as smart as he pictured you to be.

However, the worst part actually was that it didn't stop him from liking you. He had troubles understanding himself, but he could do nothing but become jealous if he accidentally saw you in the Academy, his mood worsening instantly at just a mention of you. Why was it like that? You were just some girl, not even as good as he thought at first, yet he kept thinking about you and words you said all the time. It felt like a damn groundhog day until he started intentionally ignoring the fact you were somewhere around.

Now Shoto knew he was just too young to understand what you meant; people said girls were maturing mentally earlier than boys, and that was probably true. You were so right about him. He was way better than the majority of men - and Heroes, too. Being with him certainly meant more pressure, bigger commitment, and less fun. A 16-year-old girl certainly wasn't prepared for it, especially since he wasn't fully developed as a man either. Now the situation was different, though.

Bitter at your rejection, he thought someone as careless and silly like you wound end up just like Uwabami or disappear from the world of heroes at all. If course, he certainly didn't expect you to suddenly mature and become a good therapist attending to heroes suffering from PTSD, depression, and other mental conditions due to specifics of their work. Sometimes you also treated civilians after incidents right on the spot, ensuring they would recover from shock quickly. Shoto had to admit it was a decent job. It was a pity when his own mother had desperately needed help you were too young for give her that.

Anyway, it didn't matter now. Things had long changed, and Shoto had changed, too.

He had become one of the most well-known pro heroes in Japan, the one people prayed for thanks to all he had done for their sake. He didn't care about becoming #1 since it was purely the dream of his old man, but Shoto admitted his popularity was still growing even after years of service. He was a national hero. People dreamed to see him at least once; sidekicks were ecstatic when he offered them to work at his agency; even pro heroes enjoyed working with them thanks to his professionalism and calm demeanor. Shoto never thought it would actually happen, but he became a pillar of the community, and his authority couldn't be ignored. He was a force to be reckoned with.

Did you think about him now? Did you regret rejecting him that day? If you weren't so silly, you could have been by his side now, enjoying all those things Shoto could offer. Hell, if he had married to you, you'd be definitely considered a celebrity of some kind now. Did you think about it?

It was a pity Shoto couldn't get inside your head.

But he could certainly make you think about him again. Especially since now he obviously knew how to treat a lady: flowers, chocolate, sudden gifts, casual but always pleasant meetings, phone calls and messages at night. He knew you hadn't been dating anyone for quite some time, too busy with your work, so he was sure you'd appreciate his gestures. And you appreciated them, you really did, but it never seemed enough for him. It was taking too long for Shoto, the one who had been waiting and planning it for years. Did you really have to go through this whole courtship display? Did it matter so much? He was always there when you needed him, always ready to grant your wishes, do whatever he could to please you, make you feel safe, protected. He was sure he made his intentions clear, so why waiting for so long? Why pretending like you were still dating when you went as far as spend a night with him?

Once it occurred to him that maybe you weren't convinced his intention was to marry you, so it was probably better to propose properly. However, this thought seemed to somewhat bother him: what if you played your trick again? Tell him you were too young for that and just wanted to have fun? Going through this again now would be ridiculous. No, no, Shoto was clear enough; you certainly understood his intentions. It's just your understanding of courtship period was different from his. In the end, your own parents only married after a year and a half of dating, he discovered. Maybe you wanted to wait a little more, but Shoto just couldn't.

Looking at you sleeping soundly in his bed, he lifted the corners of his mouth, thinking how you were going to like the wedding dress waiting for you in the room next to his. Although he was in a rush to prepare to the wedding ceremony that, unfortunately, wouldn't be big, he already knew how to convince you to make a second one for the press and a thousand of guests if you wanted to. Besides, even though this ceremony was small, it was still fancy: your wedding dress and jewelry cost a fortune; the stylists and photographers were at your disposal to make this day even more special, and he made sure to buy the best wedding ring any girl could wish for.

Everything had been done to perfection. There was only one thing he needed from you.

Watching you slowly waking up while being cuffed to the headboard of his large bed, Shoto smiled, thinking of the words you said that day when he first asked you out. Oh, you were going to get the perfect husband material and a bad guy all at once.

______________

Tags: @coolio-love @awesomerextyphoon​

[spitefulcrepechan]

If that's ok, i'd like to know more about the ocs of yours pictured in your post about unique art styles! They have really cool designs! Also is it ok to check your toyhouse? i prefer to ask before such things, i want to respect potential boundaries

Sure go ahead me TH is available for anyone :0

As for my OCs, well buckle up cuz this'll be a long one

Before I start though, I'd like to note something really quickly-

All the OCs I have are of a closed species called Soultunes, which are basically when souls intertwine with a certain song, which gives them magical powers and a change of appearance, kinda like a Quirk or an Epithet. No you cannot make your own(or at least call an OC a soultune), this species belong to a friend of mine and is kind of a friends-only thing.

Heck, Hecate, and Hecatia Helloh

So these 3, for starters, are demons. They were all one person before falling into hell, and when they got their Soultune, HELLOHELL, they splitted into 3 people. Then they were appointed to be one (or rather 3) of Fimimi's many Arbiters(which are basically Hell's law enforcement)

The 3 are semi-hive-minded, usually having the same thoughts and speaking at the same time, though They're capable of acting independent and can be split apart with no consequence, even sharing different moods.

Heck is the mom friend of the bunch, Hecate is the hothead, and Hecatia is the calm and sadistic one.

They're all pretty aggressive and violent, but also stick to their morals and make sure every sinners get their well-deserved punishment.

Their soultune lets then manifest magic and weaponry based on the sins of the person that's infront of them or the person themselves. Like sins against a child would allow them to create giant raddles or a person who likrs snow gives them snow powers. They can even turn minor sins like picking your nose into raw godlike energy.

They a force to be reckoned with.

Theodora "Thea" World

I honestly have nothing much with this character, not even a soultune- She just exists.

All I have is that she's a human-turned cyber diva and her soultune is Tell Your World.

Kitaa

Haha angela knockoff

So with Kitaa, they're from an alternate universe/timeline, made solely to entertain a god of the main soultuniverse. They were a robot made to solve all of humanity's problems, which they soon realized was due to humanity's inability to have their wishes granted.

So they became a force that rebelled against God and Death, trying to find a way to make everyone the authors of their own everlasting stories.

Grim Reapers attempted to fight back, one foolishly gave them a soul in hopes that sending them into the cycle of reincarnation would permentally destroy them, but all that did was allowed them to attain a soultune. They gained the soultune, String Theocracy, and proceeded to convert their whole universe into an infinite, reality bending library and successfully granting humans the ability to achieve their desires via connecting them to magic books.

They now set their eyes on the current universe in order to "salvate" the rest of existence. Knowing that the gods there would be capable of destroying them, they went under the guise of a mafia boss, with their highest ranking members being the ones with the books.

April Loop

(With and without her capelet)

So I haven't really planned out a backstory for her explaining exactly why she has a soultune, other then that she was dismissive of her own emotions and felt that every day was just a constant repeat of the same old day. She eventually got her soultune and practically used it on herself, trapping herself in a Groundhog Day Loop until someone by the name of Irse convinced her to end the timeloop and now they're besties with a bit of a shipping thing going on dhhdhdhdh

She kinda laidback and awkward, sorta cocky as well, but other than that she's just a plain normal girl.

Apriloop, her soultune, let's her create cherry blossoms on her body which allow her to manipulate time. Having sakuras bloom out of your body can be kinda painful, and she has no control over where they bloom soooo-

Aaand Lastly

Bristol Kakumei

(Ft an alternate outfit)

Bristol's from a very old time(still wondering where, thinking its prob Egypt but idk). And we all know during that time, women weren't considered human beings. She got tired of men treating her like trash, but due to the mentality she was set upon, instead of fighting for female rights, she decided to prove to every incel in her neighborhood/kingdom/town that she was more valuable than any girl they've ever seen. So she had her servants kill her, turn her corpse into a statue, then place her in a vat of amber, literally turning herself into a piece of art. Centuries later, scavengers found her vat and placed her in a historical museum, where she remained for years, even when she gained a soultune that reanimated her, she admired people seeing her as a work of art. Theeeeeeen a thief by the name of Ramona broke into the museum, not with the ambition to steal her, but rather to let her know that woman aren't oppressed(as much) anymore and she can live a free lady. She was easily swayed and convinced by Ramona, so she allowed herself to be taken away by her. Now they're GFs. [Cough]

As for her soultune, well it's Brain Revolution Girl. Prob not that fitting, I honestly think Pyrite Girl is a better fit but eh too late I made her before Pyrite Girl even existed so R.I.P. [badum tsh]. Her soultune just gives her the Midas Touch, albeit controllable so she isnt going around turning everything into gold. Also she's practically unkillable, being a golden statue n all

And this only scratching the surface of all me OCs, you can learn more about them on me TH.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Reviews: The Phantom and the Sorceress

Ducktales returns! The Phantom Blot returns to animation after too damn long with a neat backstory, an infnity guantlet and a hate boner for anything magic related. And since Lena is magic related she’s forced to go to her worst enemy and local close up magician Magica De Spell for help. Also Gladstone is here because we missed him and for no other reason. But we missed him so it’s okay. Friendship Is Magic, under the cut. 

Woo-ooo! We’re back! Months later and in a new room, with new things to be depressed about because this year is groundhog day and everyone is bill murray, which isn’t as fun as it should be, Ducktales is finally back on screens and in my heart. And my galbladder.. he really likes ducktales.  But yeah with the recent cancelation of the venture bros, it’s nice to get it’s spirtual littlte brother back just a few weeks later to help fill the void, and while a comparison to it now I know frank’s a fan and noticed the simlarties between rusty and gyro thanks to a tumblr post, the same post for both things inf act, I might just do that one day. But tha’ts not what your here, for , iv’e had to rewrite this intro enough times, Pitter Patter, let’s get at er. 

This episodes opens with Scrooge sitting down for his morning tea when the kids pop out of the tv and hte bored way he figures it out is really hilarious. David Tennat is really good at selling just how Scrooge has both seen it all and has the deductive skills of Barbra Gordon. What eveyrone syaing “Of batman” gets old after a while and she’s just as smart as he is, especially as oracle. Point is it’s a good bit. As he correclty guesses the kids were playing Legends of Nerverquest or whatever that game Huey and Della played last season is called, one of them wished it was real, presumibly Dewey, and Lena’s magic accidently made it happen.  And since it’s her first spotlight episode of the season, and possibly only one since this season is kind of packed, it’s time to talk about Lena! Admitely I PLANNED to do at least her first episode and her two season 2 episodes before this, but life got in the way so here we are. Lena.. is easily one of my faviortes, the number of weblena chats have made that clear. She’sd got a compelling arc, the show tackles abuse well in her narrative, and she and webby have really sweet chemstiry. Plus she brought us Violet and i’ll always be greatful for that and she’s voiced by Kimiko Glenn in her first major voice acting role so that helps too. SHe’s a great addition to the cast and the canon. Same, as the previous comment made obvious, goes for Violet, and the three togther have a great dynamic and i’ts nice to finally see an episode with JUST the three of them post “Friendship Hates Magic.”. 

But yeah Lena’s magic’s been going haywire and I do feel the setups abit rushed.. hilarious but rushed. While Night on Kilmotor hill did establish her magic can run wild, it was also vauge if it was because of her, or it was because magica was messing with her head. IT’s still a plausable setup since we haven’t really SEEN her use her magic or have any intrest and doing so and she’s only done so either while working for magica, to undo something magica did, or to give her sister a mace so she could literally go midevil on some alien ass, it just feels a bit abrubt. And while Night on Kilmotor hill also set up a problem we hadn’t seen on screen, it felt like it gave us more time to ease into it and Lena’s issues, and made it clear SOMETHING was up instead of just telling us that. The rest of hte episode is still good i’ve just seen the show be way better at setup than this. 

But yeah Lena’s magic keeps runing their fun and she feels bad about it, while Scrooge ends up putting his foot and spats in his mouth by voicing his hatred of magic, with all his nephews giving him a “Grandpa no look” and Webby glaring at him.. and whiel I didn’t realize it while watching it.. whiel sh’es given him a disaporving look, the equilvent of shooting bambi in the face emtoinally, she’s only been THIS angry with him one other time.. and it was the time he said “Your not family”. Thankfully this time he’s not in defnstive arrogant bastard mode, so he meekly walks it back to exclude her and she shrugs it off: She hates magic too. And really.. it’s not hard to see WHY given that most times it’s enterted her life, it’s nearly got everyone she loves killed, and that the only spellcaster she knows personally is the absuive aunt whose gaslighted her on multiple occasions, most recently to try and renslave her.  Thankfully before Webby can make an old man bleed for his insesntivity, Della reveals some magical creature is there and Scrooge, while annoyed it’s more magic, is happy for another adventure and invites everyone along. And I jsut love that he dosen’t even show the slightest hesitation bringing Violet and Lena along. As far as he’s concerned probably their family too, maybe not as much as Webby but their still welcome. I mean granted i’m sure della and donald had an awkard conversation with Ty and Indy over all this to make sure it was cool, but still, it’s a nice gesture on his part and show’s his personality: He really dosen’t care who comes along as long as they can pull their weight and share his love for adventure, their welcome.  It’s also nice ot see him and Lena interact since the two really haven’t since the shadow war: Sure he’s been in the same room with her twice, btu they haven’t really spoken. Though my honest guess is they could’ve genuinely meant for Scrooge to adopt her into the family.. but when coming up with Violet found her family adopting her and them becoming sisters to be a better idea and went with that. And to be fair it is, and not just for  shipping purposes, I just wish we got some closure on that line, but i’m also aware the show has a LOT of ground to cover each season, so I understand it probably got squeezed out by all the other stuff going on and don’t really sweat it since we got something better anyway, her getting two gay dads and a sister, it just felt worth talking about.  And in universe.. I feel he didn’t simply because he didn’t either know she was back or have a chance to, though i’m also damn certain, at least in my own headcanon, he helped those men formally adopt her. I mean he owns most of the city, and they probably also had to make Lena legally exist in the first place since I doubt Magica bothered to put her on any offical records that weren’t signed in blood and written on paper made of avian flesh, which given SCrooge’s experince is probably not the first time he had to get a person into official records who came into being by way of magic or some other weirdness. 

Anyways, Lena opts out of the adventure because she’s worried about it going haywire and Webby opts out out of sympathy and while Violet is clearly keen to go, she gladly does so for her sister.. though this just makes Lena feel worse since now her girlfriend and her sister are missing out on stuff because of her, and suggests just going to sleep before she whoopsie daisy magics them to death.  The girls end up woken from their sleep however by a bang at the door. It’s Gladstone!

Yup it’s time to talk about another character I haven’t talked about yet. Gladstone is easily one of the show’s best overhauls. See in the comics while Gladstone is just as lucky and lazy.. he’s also just.. 

Okay i’m amazed it’s taken this long for me to refrence jean ralphio in one of these reviews but i’m glad it was for this.  Back on topic, while I know Gladstone in the comics has his fans, and is softend a bit in european comics, but in most stories i’ve read with him he’s an insufferably arrogant dick. Even BEFORE getting his luck, his first apperance, which I own in trade and read earlier this year, has him trying to take Donald’s house and kick him and the nephews out on the street over a drunken wager to take a polar dive, which Donald fials because life hates him and he’s a coward. Thankfully Daisy rushed in and saved the day because she’s great sometimes ,and turned things on him wiht his own drunken crap, but still, it says something when your first apperance is trying to force three ten year olds and your own cousin out into the cold. 

He .. did not get any better once his super luck came into play. Instead he just flautned it all the time and tried to constnatly win Daisy over from donald.. which had varying sucess based on how much of a shallow dick she was being that story, and in general was just unplesant. He really only works for me in comic in those aformetioned softer times: when a writer makes his luck ruin his love life or add actual depth instead of him just being the raincloud on donal’ds parade. The original ducktales and the going quackers game are the only places I can think of he showed up otherwise, prototype in the old disney shorts nonwithstanding, and Ducktales Classic made him a nice guy from what i’ve heard. Thankfully frank and crew knew exactly what to do to adapt him perfectly: He still retains some aspects from the comics: Donald and Scrooge still hate him, Donald for Gladstone always winning and always having it easy while Donald.. is donald and thus utterly miserable half the time and on fire the other half, and Scrooge because he’s a lazy asshole who gets whatever he wants with the least effort, which didn’t change. What did change was his attitude. While he still is proud of getting whatever he wants in life with no effort and being “the best at getting something for nothing” he dosen’t lord it over everyone else. Sure he’s proud of it but he dosen’t rub Donald’s nose in how much better off he is on purpose, and genuinely loves his family, something I really coudln’t say about most versions of comic Gladstone. While he’s self serving he’s perfectly happy to share his luck with whoever else: He can always get more money whenever he needs it because of course he will. The other factor helping is , as with this entire reboot, the voice acting, in this case the marvelous Paul F Thompkins of Bojack and so much other stuff fame, who really sells the “Sleazy vegas layabout” vibe this series gives him, updating his old aristocratic asshole vibe to something more fun to watch and really being a treat anytime gladstone comes up. Gladstone singing in season 2 was entirely something Paul Improvised during his first apperance they made sure to use eventually. He’s a delight any time he shows up and a total 180 from his utterly agrviating original version. 

As for why he’s here.. said luck. is gone. After being hit by some weird energy, Gladstone suddenly, since he didn’t see it hit him, finds himself living normally: going to a restraunt offers no free meal for being 100th custmoer or anything, his wallet dosen’t magically have 20 dollars in it, and the atm gives him 20 dollars.. which would seem normal except it’s actually usually a sack of rubys.  Naturally Gladstone having coasted his entire life on his magical luck, has no idea how to function as a normal human being and is utterly hilarious as he breaks down. Admitely he’s not the biggest part of the plot, he’s mostly here for comic relief and COULD have been eaisly cut.. but he’s so hilarious and seeing him utterly fail at being a normal person and whine about things as simple as walking or going up stairs is just groovy.  As for what weird magical bolt took it, Violet being violet figures it out quick: The Phantom Blot! For those unfamiliar, he’s a charcter from the mickey mouse comics, though I know him from one episode of house and mouse that adapted those comics that I need to read more of, a master schemer and old school villian par excellence and Mickey’s greatest foe. I was ecastic to see him come here and in the capable hands of Giancarlo Espisto. While I haven’t watched brekaing bad i’ve heard nothing but good thigns and he does his best with what little he’s given. But here instead of a master schemer he’s an infamous magic theif and is obviously the one who drained gladstone.. and unforutntely for scrooge the boys and presumibly everyone else... we see him in action using his fancy infnity guantlet esque magic draining gauntlet to drain the portal they took. Ruh Roh.  It gets worse when he mistakes Lena for magica, and charges after her, though Webby is able to hold him off with the axe she grabbed on the way to the door earlier, and damages his gauntlet. he retreats.. but it’s obvious he’ll be back and both Webby and Violet come to the conclusion Lena needs to grasp her magic in order to survive.. and both have the same unfortunate relization: They only know one person who can do it and Lena, once she realizes what hteir thinking, wnats nothing to do with her, and neither do they. But they have no options: they have to go to magica.  So they journey to her house on Dagobah, with Gladstone tagging along because they need a wacky comedic sidekick to help lighten the mood what with the serious, grim hunter wanting to murder a teenage girl inf nront of her tweenage girlfriend and kid sister, and their only resort being going back to her abuser for help.  Magica however isn’t all that helpful at first. Being Magica her first move is to make a grab for the Amulet to get her power back, which her running crew thwart quickly but naturally Lena still wants nothing to do with her and Magica just insults her for not using magic and because she’s a terrible person. SHe does however end up changing her tune when she hears the blot’s involved. She whisks them inside while we get a cutaway to FOWL headquarters where blot is working on his guantlet more on him in a minute.  We soon get the Blot’s backstory which is actually really inttresting and invovled even if it’s not a lot like who he is in the comcis or house of mouse: A long ass time ago before meddling kids got in her way, Magica took over a small vililage with the threat of destroying it and eveyrone in it outright unless they gave her tributes.. and when those got boring she just did it anyway. Problem was, as happens a lot when evil sorecerers calously destroy hometowns, one of them survivied. It’s even lampshaded by Magica as she points out Blot wasn’t the first. The problem was.. he was persitant. The blot never gave up, coming up with better tech to fight her magic each time and coming back stronger and likely more determined. I like this verson: While he’s not the bwahahah mastermindk, he’s still an utter threat, a force with an unyielding hatred and a burning mission to take out the target of his hate and anything like her. He reminds me a lot of toffee from star vs but if htey actually gave his backstory on screen. A meancing, somehwat quite, or mostly silent in the blot’s case, immortal menace who’s deterimiend to wipe out those who wronged him and anything related to them and has warped from what was once probably a decen tperson into a human engine of destruction with one goal and one goal only. He’s a good enoguh villian for the episode, I just hope if he comes back they give him better lines. his dialouge is really what dosen’t work for me as whiel his backstory and aura of meance work, Giancarlo is given nothing to work with line wise. He dosen’t need to be a chatty cathy or anything, just give him one or too really cool lines. Sometimes tha’ts all you need. Watch how the pros do it. 

I do like this verison, I jsut think they could do more, but given the show has a good track record for only getting better with their villians with every use, I have no worries about that and he’s still a cool enough threat. I also wish we got more of fowl or why he’s working with them. just a small scene with one of them was all I asked, because we’ve barely gotten fowl this season. It’s really one of the season’s only real problems so far: 8 episodes in and while FOWL agents have shown up twice, adn one of the episodes did advance that plot by showing off heron and steelbeak, we really haven’t seen any progress on their plans to both take the missing mysteries or kill the Clan McDuck. HOpefully this changes as we go and again, it dosen’t ditract from the episode itself, jsut the season as a whole.  Anyways, Lena is still relucntant because Magica is terrible and keeps slipping in how much she wants to take the amulet every five minutes. I love the show and catherine tate’s take on magica: just as hammy and nuts as before but when she does have magic, she’s the utter threat she was before too times ten.  But yeah while Lena’s relunctant.. neither of htem really has a choice> Magica needs her amulet secure to get her magic back, and Lena needs to not die. So they relucntantly agree to work together among more hilarous sniping.  Cue a training montage set to a hell of an 80′s tune. The show really has a good habit of making good incdental music to use in bits like this. Lena trains, uses gladstone as the training dummy, and it’s funny as it is creative and we even get some karate kids bit and the obvious star wars refrences. Meanwhile the blot approaches ever closer..  We also find out something important from Magica as she chastises Lena for having fun with her friends while training after Lena uses blue magic instead of purple: Turns out much like spellcasters in say owl house or my little pony each caster has a specific color to their magic, a Colur of magic if you will. Magica’s, and lena using hers is purple while the blue magic we’ve seen from her is her own powered by friendship and love. It’s a nice advancement of what we’ve seen so far: We’ve seen her magic powered by webby is stronger than her other stuff, and we’ve seen it come out during times their bond, or in the case of kilmotor hill her bond with everyone, is strongest. We knew something was diffrent with the magics and it’s now given a though and clearly well thought out explination why: Magica’s magic is hers and Lena was just borrowing it.. the blue stuff is hers and hers alone.  Magica does try to get her to master it by having one of her friends shoot her.. Webby of course strongly objects so Violet takes it up since it is for study after all and her sister can take a hit. Lena also wonders how she can even do magic without the amulet, but as Magica makes clear, and as I outlined above, the amulet is just help. The blue magic is her. Lena fails to use it though to deflect in time.. and to make matters worse the blot shows up after plopping gladstone down and wants to kill them  both.  We then get easily the best laugh of the episode.. as Magica tries stage magic and the blot wonders what the hell he’s looknig at. I mean this is his mortal enemy, the monster who killed everyone he’d ever known or loved... pulling out a bunch of colored rags and asking him to pick a card. It’s amazing. Lena attacks from the side and Webby and Violet quickly asist, with Magica joining in to use the rope to bind him and Lena’s magic kicking in, turning the rope into chain and summoning a snake.. but in a show of badassery the blot easily shrugs it off: he absorbs the magic, escapes and knocks them around while Webby asks the snake for help.. can she speak snake? She hopes so. 

Then things get dire as The Blot starts absorbing the magic.. and killing lena as she starts to fade away. Magica of course can’t even feign dispaointment in anything but loosing her magic. And that’s also something I really love here: The show makes no attempt to make magica better or turn around because it just isn’t who she is and even if she did after all the abuse she did, Lena would have zero reason to forgive her. It’s nice that they DON’T try redemeing her or shoing a brighter side: she’s a bad person, a worse caregiver and they only came to her because they had no choice. 

But as the magic’s absorbed magica does tell her to find the source of the power and we get a great scene: She first thinks of all the abuse magica’s done to her and it’s a harrowing montage to watch. But webby, breaks through that, since that obviouslyf ails and reminds her of where HER magic comes from: Her and webby. and we get an adorable,a nd shiptastic montage as we see more clips from past episodes.. but this time we see their adorable fistbump from “Beagle BOy Birthday Massacre”, their hug from “Jaw$!” and Lena’s return to the world and hug with her lady and future sister from “Friendship hates magic”. IT’s her friends, her sister and the love of her life who are her real source of power, and her magic connects to htem as lena ccccchanges.  And I mean entirely, her outfit changes and she gets these.. weird bright blue eyes. Like I like the rest of her outfits, a white and blue attire to show her change with a badass cape, looks like a superhero so naturally I love it.. her eyes just look really off. Like when Milo Muprhy’s law tried to give characters colored irses. Because no one else in ducktales has them it just loosk.. weird.. Otherwise though I like it. We then get a beam struggle, but with adde dhelp from her friends and her new power, Lena eventually beats the blot, as her sheer power overloads the guantlet and sends him running. However in the confusion the amulet was lost.. and Magica gets it back. Lena whollops her easily, pointing out her magic’s purpose is to protect the world from people like her. It’s a nice development too: Lena realizes MAGIC isn’t inherently evil... it’s how it’s used. Star Vs could’ve maybe taken this lesson, but regardless, it’s a nice bit of character development realizing that magic is a part of her IS Her, and she shoudln’t have to give up something in her nature because of her abuser. Magica, while repowered, is force dto lookf or her staff while Lena gladly floats team magic home. Also with the guantlet broken gladstone is back, as a rain of 20 dolalr bills he uses as tissues confims, and the portal returns, and with Lena you know, havin ga whole superhero outfit, glowing blue eyes and her hair streak now blue, they know something clearly happend and the episode just kind of ends. Still a good one.  Final Thoughts: This was a good one as I just said. While I had my nitpicks here and there as I also said, Lena’s strong character, and the game performances of Espisito, Thompkins, and Tate really add to our usual trlo, and as I mentioned before it’s nice ot see team magic get their own episode now their a full team. IT’s just a good romp and a good way back. I”ve made my complaints clear but their drowned out by good jokes, good character stuff, and good worldbuilding that makes this an utter thrill and a great one to come back to and i’tll also be intresting to see where Lena goes from here.  But wherever she goes she’ll have webby. They can be whot hey are, independent together, if theyt ry. And yes that’s my shiping song for htem and yes I have one. 

Quick bit before I go I dind’t get to, Gladstone flirts with magica when she lands in his arms, a little something for the shippers and a nice gesture on frakn’s part. Whle she rejects him and he dumps her in the sludge with a shrug. I mean.. their probably going to bang at some point. Gladstone’s powers mean he’ll likely find her when sh’es super horny and more than willing, and he’ll be like “eh why not boobs”. I mean I thought about this: I figure his powers allow him to find a willing partner, any gender or none at all I see him as pansexual, who happens to probablyb e loaded and diseased free, whenever he happens to be into it who naturallyw orks out perfectly because if he gets money whenever he wants it, why not sex? It’s not even a concious thing as we’ve seen things just work out for him so of course he probably gets laid, and as we see here it’s only if the other person consets. Good for him. Hope to see him again sooner. I want to see more of him and della interacting and see what she thinks of him. Freshe eys andall that. 

But yeah this was great to come back to. If you liked this i’ve reviewed the rest of the season up to this point and will be reviewing each episdoe every monday till they stop again, so keep an eye out for that.  You can check the tabs on my blogs for more reviews, come back this weekend for regular loud house coverag,e follow for more reviews or shoot me a pm if you’d like to comission me to do an episode. For just 5 bucks i’ll review any episode of any animated show of your choosing, and as i’ve only covered one season 2 episode of ducktales, there’s over 40 left ot choose from if you have any you want to hear my thoughts on. Until then stay safe, quack hard, and Go Team Venture! Play us out Steg .. and Co. 

[hag-rambling-on]

Rewinxing Timeline Pre-Series

Keep in mind that between events and events can pass centuries. The average experience of a person is 10,000 years. and if you have magic and you know how to use it... Because I love Belgariad Chronicles so magic MAY makes you inmortal because yes.

WARNING: LONG. AND SURE I'M MISSING SOMETHING. OR CROSS SOMETHING. AGGG. MY HEAD.

And yes, in my rewinxing there is racism, selfishness, "human" idiocy and other nonsense. Why do The Ancestresses ALWAYS fight together?

PROTOHISTORY

Ethereals Fight - Big Bang

They actually do it two more times -Nobody says the must be AllIntelligents. So, Out Life, Big Bang Again.

They decide that they better stop and see what could happen to the result of their first and third fights: "life" they decide to call it, it would be interesting if it were allowed to develop.

Planets are formed, they become habitable.

The first intelligent creatures are born (Clariel -female human races, Carabossa -male elven races, Kristjana -female mermaid/triton races, Oros - male centaurs races, Ninfea -female pixies, Laufey -female gigant races, Danu- hermaphrodite selkies). They all talk funny. They all are old as dust.

TIME OF LEGENDS  - ANCIENT TIMES

Skips and happens a millennium or two of advance in all systems and their planets.

Magic flourishes. But technology also, the native giants of Xenia are particularly advanced in it.

Darkar, previously knows as Lord Argulus of Larisa, Fae of Birds (one now uninhabitable planet from Hercules, aka Domino system) borns.

All the Mythix members are born already.

Solarian witch Selemisa meets Lumeria and Lumen race (also, first Cosmix user).

Acheron, Wizard of Memories begin to writes the Legendarium.

The days of the groundhog begin.

The Ancestral Witches have born.

Mythix comes together and decides to confront Acheron and his allies.

The Legendarium is closed and the Mythix Ones get separated because people are scared of their association.

THE WAR - THE DARK AGE

Sparks (First Queen of the planet that would become Domino) has born.

Carabossa Acrypta, as soft as dangerous his thorns; finds, keeps safe and educates said the ancestral witches maybe too early in their magic.  

The InterRealm Wars starts. Nobody remembers anymore why - which is SHAMEFUL - because wars are stupid. Some energetic or magical resource. It will last for centuries.

Darkar gets both Morix and Shadow Phoenix Blessing.

Many of the planets and kingdoms reflected in the Legendarium no longer exist, Many histories and cultures that will be forgotten. Solaria, Andros and Romulea, among others, can boast they are ancient and have stood on their feet. But even they don't remember everything.

Many other planets, like Domino, Titania and Zenith, have flourished from the remains of previous ones.

The three witches begin to go “a little” crazy - Only Carabossa and his near ones know them at this point.

Darkar is one of the biggest detractors of peace. Something about "new beginnings". Most people take for granted that the Ethereal's blessing and the destruction of his planet drove him crazy.

Acrypta and Arcadia, along with other Mythix and Elders are offered position in the Golden Kingdom. Almost all reject. The Mythix faes and witches in the end they die by age, minus Arcadia because the Ethereals need someone who knews about the Legendarium and forces her. Ninfea escapes on a tiny technicality (but she can no longer move from Hike's remains), Laufey and Carabossa use their magic to go on the run and Danu melts into the Infinite Ocean [[So yes, the Council of Elders don’t actually likes that much the Ethereals but they are not foolish enough to be rude from the front]].

Somehow that includes that it’s the little bricks that make up a castle, the war actually ended. The Peace Accords are signed and their symbol is the Monastery of Roccaluce. Day celebrated on all planets.

The Council of Magic Realm is created with its headquarters in Monastery of Roccaluce in the rest of the planet Hike, Magix.

Alfea, Cloud Tower and Lymphea College are founded. There were already other schools being founded in each pleant, but these have the approval of the Council.

The connection of the Earth/Terra with the rest of the planets is cut abruptly JUST WHEN ALL THE AGREEMENTS WERE FINISHED AND after they played a significant role in the Peace Negotiations.

The Three Witches disappear. Along Darkar. They actually go to Omega and whatever Darkar teach the Three Witches, is such that the planet has been claiming the magic of the visitors to try sustain itself ever since.

MODERN AGE - NEW TIMES

The Major Earth Fairies (Morgana, Diana, Nebula, Sibylla, Aurora, Tinkerbell, Eldora) are teenagers right now.

Overlapping with the Peace Accords, the Wizards of the Black Circle (a minor section of Terra magic user who went their own way). They begin to hunt the fairies as soon as said fairies begin their formation (which is when the wings are solid) and tear them off. This forces all the fairies on Earth to back down and all the negative magic users to hide for not wanting to join them. The Earth soon forgets about magic. The Earth, with the ley lines cut (because in its crossways, now closed, are the last refuges of the fairies, this includes Neverland, El Dorado and Tir Nan Og among others ) it got stuck, lost its quality, and the terrans, quantity of life. But it never got to the Omega level, because, well, something there. The only way the fairies had to get out were the ones able to cast White Circles, only half of the Major Fairies on Terra are capable of doing them, and usually the visits did not turn out well or did not like what they saw outside and the Wizards were destroying them very time they could.

Acrypta keep missing to THE ETHEREALS SIGHT, still searching his kids. ALSO Laufey, whether they are together or not, no one knows, but the Council take for granted that they are in the Golden Kingom, and no one there is going to deny that. Because, while the Elders don't hate the Council, they don't endorse it either. Council of Elders against the Universe.

The Three Witches visit for first time Domino. Tharma and/or Liliss tricked the King of Domino and tried got part of his Dragon Flame - but they couldn't store it all because of how the Blessing works- This visit will become a recurring and increasingly destructive thing, something personal.

Lord Darkar dirty kills Carabossa before he reaches the Three Witches... I... I  just tried to redeem the The Ancestresses... NO. Not on my guard... well maybe, they are CRAZY. But he is the first Wizard and kinda blessed by ethereals too. The guy respects that. If Ninfea, bonded pixie to Carabossa didn't die then was by Ethereals dis-grace, I mentioned before. But two ethereal-blessed dudes could "cancel" the other blessings (in Carabossa not the typical blessing but Golden Kingdom inmortal membership blessing)

Almost all people from the Company of Light has born and started or almost finished school at this point. Faragonda switches from Witch to Fairy, Kalshara things happens,

Marion borns and receives the Dragon Flame from her father.

Valtor is “born”. Physically his appearance is a carbon copy to Carabossa, but sadly not my adorkable one and composed of the flesh and blood of the three sisters, Carabossa and the King of Domino Ninfea and Carabossa's pixie tie influences the birth of Valtor (I'll leave it there). AND HE FUCKING ACTUALLY GETS THE DRAGON’S BLESSING. Twisted universe and Ethereal Dark Sense of Humour.

Valtor is sent to mingle with the people to conquer the planets "by wordiness" and get allies, while the witches try “by force”. Griffin joins Valtor, not the Ancestresses. Daphne and Politea borns sometime around here.

The Lord of the Templars Gareth seal Darkar back in Omega BEFORE the destruction of Domino hoping that the fact that according to their latest reports the Ancestresses have abandoned it and the planet now absorbs magic will keep him locked up. It begins to be used as a prison in general. Also he sends Darkar to Omega because their current Boundless Oblivion Keeper, Mandragora had switched sides and he preferred to finish ensuring that everything was in order and check any what she could have done.

With an unexpected, but welcome freedom, the Ancestresses become more agressive and forces Valtor’s political hand. All politics in vain but for all this policy and such is that in season 3 Valtor moves so fast in the theft of spells between planets.

Griffin lefts Valtor, the Company of Light is officially founded. YAY!!! -F*CKING FINALLY. They had suspicions against Valtor until then.

Bloom (named Ariadne in Domino) and the main cast and others around their ages are born.

With Valtor as the most obvious and localized target, they easily send him to Omega and one less problem.

Politea betrays Daphne.

Roxy is born with Morgana visit to Terra. She stays with her family for a bit.

The Ancestresses attack Domino in retaliation knowing that "his daughter" had a lot to do with this. No, not because he was their son, but because he was their toy. The witches first attempted to attack Domino across the Infinite Ocean, so only Daphne was able to defend it. Quickly changing the scene, they attacked her sister and and even faster than them she jumped to protect her, then Daphne transferred the Dragon's Flame to Bloom, a moment that they took advantage of to defeat but actually not kill her (because having a fairy who had obtained the Nymphix could be useful later to dissect).

All this time it served to reunite the Company of Light who totally went with the intention of -kill- seal them in Boundless Oblivion since they are not as nice as The Templar Leader (specially with Oritel and Marion leading and their missing daughters), and there are many so they can actually do the spell quickly (Gareth went one on one with Darkar, go Gareth!!) But the witches did not leave without a fight and all Domino went with them to Oblivion.

PRE-SERIES

Faragonda becomes Headmistress.

Morgana witnesses Bloom's arrival on Earth and gives a super-ultra-mega-fast  advice to Mike and Vanessa. She didn't even get a chance to properly introduce Roxy and Bloom or learn Bloom's name.

Sadly, Bloom arrival also triggers the one of the Wizards of the Black Circle. To the trash the years Morgana spent being careful! So, placing on both girls a little glamour that would prevent their still-developing magic from being detected she had to put on a great little performance to make the Wizards thinks she was the only magic user there, and returned to her Kingdom.

Said spell in the future would prevent Eldora from detecting Bloom's magic.

[papermoonloveslucy]

MRS. COOPER’S BOYFRIEND

February 10, 1950

“Mrs. Cooper’s Boyfriend” is episode #75 of the radio series MY FAVORITE HUSBAND broadcast on February 10, 1950.

Synopsis ~ Liz decides that the only way to keep George's mother from coming over on Valentine’s Day is to get her a boyfriend.

“My Favorite Husband” was based on the novels Mr. and Mrs. Cugat, the Record of a Happy Marriage (1940) and Outside Eden (1945) by Isabel Scott Rorick, which had previously been adapted into the film Are Husbands Necessary? (1942). “My Favorite Husband” was first broadcast as a one-time special on July 5, 1948. Lucille Ball and Lee Bowman played the characters of Liz and George Cugat, and a positive response to this broadcast convinced CBS to launch “My Favorite Husband” as a series. Bowman was not available Richard Denning was cast as George. On January 7, 1949, confusion with bandleader Xavier Cugat prompted a name change to Cooper. On this same episode Jell-O became its sponsor. A total of 124 episodes of the program aired from July 23, 1948 through March 31, 1951. After about ten episodes had been written, writers Fox and Davenport departed and three new writers took over – Bob Carroll, Jr., Madelyn Pugh, and head writer/producer Jess Oppenheimer. In March 1949 Gale Gordon took over the existing role of George’s boss, Rudolph Atterbury, and Bea Benaderet was added as his wife, Iris. CBS brought “My Favorite Husband” to television in 1953, starring Joan Caulfield and Barry Nelson as Liz and George Cooper. The television version ran two-and-a-half seasons, from September 1953 through December 1955, running concurrently with “I Love Lucy.” It was produced live at CBS Television City for most of its run, until switching to film for a truncated third season filmed (ironically) at Desilu and recasting Liz Cooper with Vanessa Brown.

MAIN CAST

Lucille Ball (Liz Cooper) was born on August 6, 1911 in Jamestown, New York. She began her screen career in 1933 and was known in Hollywood as ‘Queen of the B’s’ due to her many appearances in ‘B’ movies. With Richard Denning, she starred in a radio program titled “My Favorite Husband” which eventually led to the creation of “I Love Lucy,” a television situation comedy in which she co-starred with her real-life husband, Latin bandleader Desi Arnaz. The program was phenomenally successful, allowing the couple to purchase what was once RKO Studios, re-naming it Desilu. When the show ended in 1960 (in an hour-long format known as “The Lucy-Desi Comedy Hour”) so did Lucy and Desi’s marriage. In 1962, hoping to keep Desilu financially solvent, Lucy returned to the sitcom format with “The Lucy Show,” which lasted six seasons. She followed that with a similar sitcom “Here’s Lucy” co-starring with her real-life children, Lucie and Desi Jr., as well as Gale Gordon, who had joined the cast of “The Lucy Show” during season two. Before her death in 1989, Lucy made one more attempt at a sitcom with “Life With Lucy,” also with Gordon.

Richard Denning (George Cooper) was born Louis Albert Heindrich Denninger Jr., in Poughkeepsie, New York. When he was 18 months old, his family moved to Los Angeles. Plans called for him to take over his father’s garment manufacturing business, but he developed an interest in acting. Denning enlisted in the US Navy during World War II. He is best known for his  roles in various science fiction and horror films of the 1950s. Although he teamed with Lucille Ball on radio in “My Favorite Husband,” the two never acted together on screen. While “I Love Lucy” was on the air, he was seen on another CBS TV series, “Mr. & Mrs. North.” From 1968 to 1980 he played the Governor on “Hawaii 5-0″, his final role. He died in 1998 at age 84.

Gale Gordon (Rudolph Atterbury) and Bea Benadaret (Iris Atterbury)  are not heard in this episode. 

Ruth Perrott (Katie, the Maid) was also later seen on “I Love Lucy.” She first played Mrs. Pomerantz (above right), a member of the surprise investigating committee for the Society Matrons League in “Pioneer Women” (ILL S1;E25), as one of the member of the Wednesday Afternoon Fine Arts League in “Lucy and Ethel Buy the Same Dress” (ILL S3;E3), and also played a nurse when “Lucy Goes to the Hospital” (ILL S2;E16). She died in 1996 at the age of 96.

Bob LeMond (Announcer) also served as the announcer for the pilot episode of “I Love Lucy”. When the long-lost pilot was finally discovered in 1990, a few moments of the opening narration were damaged and lost, so LeMond – fifty years later – recreated the narration for the CBS special and subsequent DVD release.

GUEST CAST

Eleanor Audley (Leaticia Cooper, George’s Mother) previously played this character in “George is Messy” and “Dinner for 12″. She would later play Eleanor Spalding, owner of the Westport home the Ricardos buy in “Lucy Wants To Move to the Country” (ILL S6;E15) in 1957, as well as one of the Garden Club judges in “Lucy Raises Tulips” (ILL S6;E26).

Hans Conried (Mr. Anderson) first co-starred with Lucille Ball in The Big Street (1942). He then appeared on “I Love Lucy” as used furniture man Dan Jenkins in “Redecorating” (ILL S2;E8) and later that same season as Percy Livermore in “Lucy Hires an English Tutor” (ILL S2;E13) – both in 1952. The following year he began an association with Disney by voicing Captain Hook in Peter Pan. On “The Lucy Show” he played Professor Gitterman in “Lucy’s Barbershop Quartet” (TLS S1;E19) and in “Lucy Plays Cleopatra” (TLS S2;E1). He was probably best known as Uncle Tonoose on “Make Room for Daddy” starring Danny Thomas, which was filmed on the Desilu lot. He joined Thomas on a season 6 episode of “Here’s Lucy” in 1973. He died in 1982 at age 64.

Hal March (Mr. Jenkins / Mr. Crockett) first appeared on the “I Love Lucy” in “Lucy Fakes Illness” (ILL S1;E16) using his own name to play an actor posing as the doctor who diagnoses Lucy with ‘golbloots.’ March got his first big break when he was cast as Harry Morton on “The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show” in 1950. He eventually lost the part to Fred Clark who producers felt was better paired with Bea Benaderet, who played Blanche, and here plays Iris Atterbury. He stayed with the show in other roles, the last airing just two weeks before his appearance as Eddie Grant in “Lucy is Matchmaker” (ILL S2;E27). In 1966 he was seen on “The Lucy Show.”

Frank Nelson (J.Q. Williams, Chairman of the Bank) was born on May 6, 1911 (three months before Lucille Ball) in Colorado Springs, Colorado. He started working as a radio announcer at the age of 15. He later appeared on such popular radio shows as “The Great Gildersleeve,” “Burns and Allen,” and “Fibber McGee & Molly”. This is one of his 11 performances on “My Favorite Husband.”  On “I Love Lucy” he holds the distinction of being the only actor to play two recurring roles: Freddie Fillmore and Ralph Ramsey, as well as six one-off characters, including the frazzled train conductor in “The Great Train Robbery” (ILL S5;E5), a character he repeated on “The Lucy Show.” Aside from Lucille Ball, Nelson is perhaps most associated with Jack Benny and was a fifteen-year regular on his radio and television programs.

EPISODE

ANNOUNCER: “As we look in on the Coopers it’s morning. George Cooper is eating breakfast, while Liz in the kitchen talking to Katie, the maid.”

Liz is planning the menu for an intimate Valentine’s Day dinner with George.

LIZ: “Hearts of beef, hearts of artichoke, hearts of lettuce, heart-shaped candy, and heart-shaped cake.” KATIE: “That oughta give ya heart-shaped heartburn!” 

Liz joins George for breakfast and notices that he has nicked himself shaving - several times.

LIZ: “You look like you have your face up in paper curlers.”

Liz confesses she used George’s razor to string beans! Liz apologizes with a smooch. She brings up Valentine’s Day, and George breaks it to her that his mother is coming. George reminds Liz that his mother always spends the holidays with them. 

LIZ: “It’s Valentine’s Day, not Halloween!  Can’t we give her a rain check until Groundhog Day or something?” 

Groundhog Day is an American folk tradition established in Pennsylvania around 1840, that supposes that if a groundhog comes out of his burrow and sees his shadow, we are in for six more weeks of winter. The tradition has inspired a Hollywood film and a Broadway musical.  Since the date is traditionally February 2 (before Valentine’s Day), Liz is really extending her hospitality into 1951! 1955′s “Lucy Goes to a Rodeo” (ILL S5;E8) opens with Ricky penciling in Lucy for a kiss on February 2nd, which Lucy notes is Groundhog Day. 

Liz is upset that her romantic dinner for two will become a threesome. she suggests that if his mother wants to celebrate Valentine’s Day she should get a boyfriend. George says she has no interest in men.

LIZ: “Well, she did once. Or did she win you in a game of Canasta?”

Canasta is a card game of the rummy family devised around 1939. It is most commonly played by four in two partnerships with two standard decks of cards. The game was mentioned several times on episodes of “I Love Lucy.” 

George comes around to the idea of getting his mother a boyfriend - but who? 

LIZ: “Gee, all I can think of is the Smithsonian Institute!” 

In “Never Do Business With Friends” (ILL S2;E31), Ethel complains that her washing machine is old enough to belong in the Smithsonian Institution. Dubbed ‘the Nation’s attic’, the Smithsonian museums (located primarily in Washington DC) will be mentioned again in reference to the antique Cadillac that Fred buys for the trip to Hollywood.  

George rushes off to work. The new bank Chairman is visiting. Liz tells Katie to plan to serve three for Valentine’s Day dinner. Liz says that her mother-in-law uses any excuse to visit - even Boys Week. 

Boys (and Girls) Week was a movement to help build citizenship among youth. The movement began in 1920 with boys. In 1934, Boys Week became known as Youth Week, and in 1936, Boys and Girls Week. A project of the Rotary International, their sponsorship ceased in 1954.  

Liz has invited Mother Cooper (Eleanor Audley) over to talk about the idea and before they know it, she has arrived.

LIZ (to Katie): “Well, speak of the devil-in-law.” KATIE (hushed): “How does she get in the house so quietly?” LIZ: “She’s got a muffler on her broom.”

No sooner is she in the kitchen when she is telling Liz that there’s dust on top of her bookcase.  Liz quickly changes the subject to dating.

MOTHER COOPER: “It would be nice to have dates, but not a man!”  LIZ: “Not a man!?!  Well, I don’t know any kangaroos!” 

Mother Cooper is intrigued by the idea, but doesn’t think anyone would be interested in a woman of her age.

MOTHER COOPER: “The man isn’t man living who’d have plain old me!” LIZ: “Well, we’ll dig someone up.”

Mrs. Cooper describes her ideal man. Liz urges her to compromise. Mother insists he is only 41 years old. As she leaves, she tells Liz to forget the whole thing. 

Katie tells Liz to try looking at the Sheridan Falls Friendship Center, where her sister found all her husbands. 

LIZ: “Katie, I’ll do it!  I’m going to get a man for Mother Cooper if I have to get an Erector Set and build her one!” 

Erector Set was a brand of metal toy construction sets which were originally sold by the Mysto Manufacturing Company in 1913, a successor to wooden Lincoln Logs and a predecessor to plastic LEGO. 

END of PART ONE After a short Jello-O commercial featuring announcer Bob LeMond providing a macaroon pudding recipe, the story resumes. 

Liz has embarked on her manhunt and we find her downtown at the Sheridan Falls Friendship Center. The building is marked by a large neon sign that says “Lonesome?” The doorbell sounds “Here Comes The Bride”. 

Thomas ‘Cupid’ Jenkins (Hal March), the founder, opens the door. 

LIZ: “I’d like to order a man!”

Liz immediately states that it is not for her, although Mr. Jenkins clearly doesn’t believe her. 

MR. JENKINS: “I understand perfectly. He’s a gift for a friend.”

Liz tells him it is for his mother-in-law. The phone rings and Mr. Jenkins answers it congratulating the caller on her success and promising to remove her card from his file. 

MR. JENKINS: “Goodbye, Lady Ashley.” (hangs up) LIZ: “Was that THE Lady Ashely?”

Sylvia, Lady Ashley (1904-77) was an English model, actress, and socialite who was best known for her numerous marriages to British noblemen and American movie stars. On December 20, 1949, she married Clark Gable, the fourth of her five husbands. The pair divorced in 1952. 

It turns out to be a different Lady Ashley. Liz and Mr. Jenkins fill out an application card for Mother Cooper. Although Liz describes her as ‘41, attractive and wealthy’, Mr. Jenkins immediately interprets that as ‘65, old battle axe, and broke’!  Liz wants someone to come to the house tonight. Mr. Jenkins promises the perfect man will come with a written 30-day guarantee!  

At the bank, George is visited by the new Chairman of the Board, J.Q. Williams (Frank Nelson). He wants to get to know the employees and George invites him over for dinner that evening. Unfortunately, their home phone seems to be out of order so he can’t alert Liz. He tells Mr. Williams the address to meet him there.

That evening, Mrs. Cooper is preparing to meet the gentleman Mr. Jenkins is sending over. The doorbell rings. It is Mr. Williams from the bank. Liz immediately assumes that he is from the Friendship Society and that the Mrs. Cooper he has come to meet is her mother-in-law.  

Liz doesn’t want Mother Cooper to know that he is an arranged suitor, so she asks him what they should say about his professional life.  

MR. WILLIAMS: “Let’s just tell her I’m Chairman of the Board at the Bank.” LIZ: “Come, now. Let’s not overdo it.”

Believing Mother Cooper to be George’s wife, he sits down next to her. Just then George comes home from work. Liz heads him off at the hallway to tell him that she’s arranged a Lonely Hearts prospect to come over for dinner. George is sure he’s a bum. 

LIZ: “You’ll die when you see him!” 

Before going into the living room to meet him, George tells Liz that he’s invited the new Chairman of the Board of the Bank to dinner - a Mr. Williams. Liz screams in horror and explains what she’s done.  The doorbell rings again. 

While George takes Mr. Williams aside to explain things to him, Liz answers the door. It is Mr. Crockett (Hal March again). Before he can get a word out, Liz immediately assumes him to be the man from the Lonely Hearts Club. She quickly instructs him to act like an old friend of hers and ushers him in to meet Mother Cooper.

MOTHER COOPER: “I liked the other one better.” 

The doorbell rings again, it is Mr. Anderson (Hans Conried), the man from the Sheridan Falls Friendship Center. He immediately assumes that Liz is the woman that Mr. Jenkins has sent him to meet!

MR. ANDERSON: “After 15 years of sending me lemons, he’s finally sent me a peach!” 

Liz is confused, but shows him in to the living room to meet Mother Cooper.  

MR. ANDERSON: “Shucks. Back to Lemons again.”

Having explained the confusion, George returns with Mr. Williams, who eagerly agrees to be Mother Cooper’s escort for the rest of the evening. Liz tells Mr. Anderson and Mr. Crockett to go back to the Friendship Center, but Mr. Crockett is confused. 

MR. CROCKETT: “What Friendship Center? I just came here to fix the telephone!”  LIZ: “Oh, no!!!”

END of EPISODE

In the live Jell-O commercial, Lucille Ball and Bob LeMond go South of the Border, where all the ‘J’s are pronounced like ‘H’. 

Lucille is Hosephine and her brother is named Himmy, who is strong as Jerkules. She reads a poem:

I know a little café It’s a perfect place to go  Because they always serve Jell-O vanilla tapio- Ca pudding. It’s delicious and tempting And you sap,  You also ought to order some Jell-O chocolate tap- Ioca. It’s so rich the kids all say it’s good I cannot rhyme Jell-O orange vanilla tapioca, I wish I could. 

Bob LeMond sums up her poem with one succinct line.  But Lucille concludes:

Those lines they tell the story, They cut the time in half.  They talk of Jell-O pudding, but they don’t get any laughs!

[kelzebub]

Medicinal Herbs

So, I’m logging onto Tumblr on an actual computer for the first time so that I can post a fic inspired by @kaoticfive and the season two side mission where Sam is sick. Basically this is sick Sam on medical marijuana, and he’s a sensitive boi. 

TW for sickness, marijuana use, paranoia, non-graphic mention of vomiting, and a very slight allusion to nightmares. 

Spoilers: none that I spotted, let me know if I accidentally included any (Sam being sick is in the tagline to the mission it refers to). No spoilers for KaoticFive’s lovely fic But We Sing It Anyway that gave me this idea (go check that out if you haven’t already, it’s awesome.)

Hope you enjoy!

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“Five. Maxine needs you at the hospital.” Amber’s voice broke in to Five’s shallow sleep.

She sat up immediately. “Is Sam okay?” she asked.

Noting Five’s face had gone pale, Amber rushed to explain. “He’s fine. Well, um. He’s fine, but, well, he couldn’t keep anything down, and his fever was still high after taking paracetamol, so Maxine took him back to the hospital. We’re out of antiemetics, but Maxine was able to give him some marijuana for the nausea and, ah. He reacted to it pretty strongly.”

Tension visibly drained out of Five’s face and shoulders, and her lips twitched up a bit. “So, you’re telling me Sam needs a highsitter?”

“Yeah. And don’t tell Maxine, but Sam’s been begging for prawn crisps, if you happen to have any.”

Five snorted. “I don’t, but I’ll see what I can scrounge up,” she said. “Thanks. I’ll be there in a few.”

Fifteen minutes later, Five stood next to Maxine, who was gesturing helplessly to Sam… who was hiding under the hospital bed.

“I don’t want to leave him alone,” the doctor sighed, “but we’re shorthanded here and I can’t spare the time to sit with him. Thanks so much for coming, Five.” She patted Five’s shoulder as if to wish her luck, and was gone.

Five crossed the small room and crouched next to the bed, peering at Sam. His hoodie was pulled up over his face as he regarded her with mild suspicion.

“Hey, Sam. You alright?”

“Fine,” he replied with false nonchalance, “why do you ask?”

The runner bit her lip, caught between amusement and concern. “Why are you hiding under the bed?”

“’m not hiding. ‘s comfy down here is all,” he replied.

“Uh huh. Mind if I join you?”

“Permission to enter the Cave of… of… permission granted,” he said, his voice wavering between his Dragons and Darkness persona and his normal one.

“Thanks.” She slid down beside him, and they lay there in silence for a moment. Five could actually hear his heartbeat, pounding a little too fast. Fever heat was still radiating off him despite the medication. Dr. Myers said it wasn’t dangerously high, but you could have fooled Five. He was like a furnace.

“It’s really not very comfy down here,” Five offered after a couple of minutes. “I bet it’s much nicer on the bed.”

“I don’t want to fall off,” Sam murmured quietly, as if confession a deep, dark secret. “The mattress keeps moving.”

“Well, I’m here now. I can make sure you don’t fall off. Make sure the mattress stays still.”

Sam squinted at her. “Are you sure?” he asked doubtfully.

“Positive. Come on, up you go,” she said as she began tugging him out from under the bed. Sam tried to sit up too soon, whacking his head on the bottom of the bedframe.

“Ow! See, I told you!”

“Slide out first, dum-dum. Good thing you had your hood up over your head or you’d have a lump there.”

Together they maneuvered a woozy Sam onto the hospital cot, onto which he lowered himself as gingerly as if it were a trampoline full of bouncing schoolchildren.

“Maxy gave me marijuana,” he explained in a loud stage whisper. “For the puking.”

“I know. She told me. She also told me you had gotten paranoid ‘probably on account of combining weed, a fever, and a large sleep deficit.’ And speaking from experience, not eating for a while didn’t likely help. So I brought you something.” Five pulled a packet of hobnobs and a Schweppe’s from her bag. “Think you could eat a little? Have a drink?”

“Oooh, I’d better not. The puking. There was quite a lot of that. It was like, like the groundhog’s day movie, only instead of living the same day over and over again, I was just like, vomiting over and over again. I don’t think groundhogs vomit. Are they the same as prairie dogs?” He trailed off, frowning at the ceiling. “They must be related. Hey, Five?”

“Yeah, Sam?”

“If there are groundhogs.” He paused. “Are there skyhogs?” and he burst into giggles, which turned into a coughing fit, followed by a short spell of dry heaving.

What a total goofball, Five thought, rubbing his back. Adorable idiot. Belatedly, she realized she was grinning at him and schooled her expression. Get it together, Five,

“I think the weed should have helped enough to try a little ginger ale, to settle your stomach. Just a sip?”

“That sounds… amazing, actually,” Sam admitted. Five cracked open the can and handed it to him.

After a while, Sam had managed the entire can of ginger ale and a couple of hobnobs. His face lost some of the pallor underneath the fever flush.

“You should rest, Sam. You haven’t been sleeping much lately, have you?”

“Scared to,” he replied, so quietly she almost missed it.

Five felt something twinge inside her chest. Before she could reply, Sam’s expression brightened. “But what is there to be afraid of when the, the brave and mighty Runner Five is here to protect me? It’s like having my own personal superhero!”

Five smirked. “With my super power of running at a normal pace for a regular human, sure,” she said. “I’ll protect you.”

“Leeloo Dallas, multipass.”

“…what?”

“That’s what she said to Corbin Dallas. Well, she said ‘me protect you.’ But it was like, her first day of being alive, you can’t hold bad grammar against her.”

Five was nonplussed. “The Fifth Element! Tell me you’ve seen the Fifth Element. With Bruce Willis and Mila Jovovich?”

“Uh, no? Should I have?”

Sam stared at her, and it almost looked like his eyes were welling up with tears. Oh. They were welling up with tears.  “I can’t believe you haven’t seen the Fifth Element! And now you probably never will! This is horrible!”

“It’s okay, Sam, it’s okay! You can tell me the whole plot, alright? I bet your version is better than the original.”

“But you have to see it! Ruby Rod, and the Diva, and… “

“Sam. Lie back down. Go to sleep.”

It was some time before Sam did, in fact, fall asleep. A little while after that, Jody returned from a successful supply run with a packet of Tamiflu. When Maxine came in to give Sam his first dose, she wished she still had a phone with a camera on it.

Sam and Five were fast asleep, Five’s arms wound tightly around him, the blanket pulled over them both, and an empty packet of hobnobs on the bedside table. Sam snored rather loudly, and Five was drooling.

The medication could wait a little while. For now, Dr. Myers would let them rest. She was pretty sure Janine had a polaroid somewhere…

[irhinoceri]

I read “I Am The Messenger” by Markus Zusak several years ago, sometime between 2002 and 2005 (because I know it wasn’t brand new when I read it but I’m pretty sure “The Book Thief” hadn’t been published yet) and at the time I loved the book. I thought it was amazing. I vaguely remember thinking the ending was a bit anticlimactic, that the resolution to the mystery of who was sending the cards felt unsatisfying, but I loved the rest of the book so much I felt like hardly mattered.

Well... gosh.... hmmmm. I have very complicated feelings now, because I listened to the audiobook, and though the narrator being Australian really gave it that perfect voice that I wasn’t able to achieve in my head when I first read it, it was a slog. I thought about turning it off several times because I just couldn’t.... stand.... it.

And it’s making me think again about The Literary Discourse posts about whether a story is good or bad based on the moral conduct of the main character. And while Ed is certainly not the most unlikeable character ever, the really problematic aspects of both him as a protagonist and a POV character leapt out at me in 2021 the way they almost completely went past me in the early 00s. I was younger, I was far more conservative, so even reading books with swearing and sex and violence in them felt kind of revolutionary to me at the time, but still. I am trying to remember what it was that I liked about it.

Part of the problem is the textbook case of The Friendzone that runs throughout the book re: Ed being in love with Audrey who considers him her best friend and refuses to have a sexual relationship with him, though she comes to him for emotional intimacy and the sort of borderline sexual intimacy of being barely clothed around him, getting drunk and sleeping with him (platonically) all while maintaining vigorous sexual relationships with other boyfriends, who mostly go unnamed because they don’t matter.

In the end, of course, Audrey finally relents and comes to him and they get together, which feels hollow to me because a far more satisfying outcome would be for Ed to learn to move on and find someone else, or at least to let Audrey go (which he ostensibly does, but then he is “rewarded” for letting her go by her finally being willing to start a sexual relationship with him). And I’m just going.... why can’t he let her go and that’s it? Why can’t it be that he lets go of the desire to have a relationship she is not willing to give, and it truly does free him? That is a wonderful feeling. I’ve been “in the friendzone” as a girl in love with guys who valued me as a friend but found me sexually unappealing, and never once did it turn out where they finally woke up one day to realize that the emotional connection we had was more important than the sexual chemistry they had with the girls they actually wanted to date. You know what feels like Growth? The point where you realize that you don’t actually Want to date that person anymore, and the point where you are free from the desire and the unrequited yearning.

I wish more stories with Friendzone plots had the guts to end the story that way. Even (or especially) in a case like this where she’s constantly telling him that he’s her best friend and the only person she loves and that’s why she’d can’t have a sexual relationship with him and coming to him at night for cuddling after she’s had E rated fic levels of sex with her “boyfriend” she doesn’t Love.... like jeezus I do feel bad for the guy in the Friendzone when the story is framed like that, you know? And this is probably how most incels think of themselves, as the long suffering Only True Gentleman who is Better than the Chad getting all the pussy (even while he’s overcome with lust whenever the Love Interest enters the scene and we have at least a few sentence describing her hips and legs and breasts).

Anyway, at this point this particular phenomenon has been debated, hashed out, disproven, what have you.... so to re-read a story where it’s so firmly romanticized and realize I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it the first time around it was an eye-opener. I was torn between disgust at the protagonist for his constant objectification of Audrey and disgust with him for allowing her to emotionally manipulate him for literal years while she fucked around and kept him her back pocket (thus the near perfect embodiment of the highly sexual yet unattainable friendzoner). I was never rooting for them to become a couple. I was always rooting for Ed to get over her or for her to leave him him alone.

The other thing that really got to me was how Ed was stalking literally everyone in the story, including a 15 year old girl whom he lusted after despite repeatedly saying he wasn’t a creep and he wasn’t doing it For Those Reasons.... but it was Okay because stalking people to help them was the point of the whole story.

(Quick plot beak down... after foiling a bank robbery, 19-year-old taxi driver (it was 2002 so he’s basically an Uber driver) Ed Kennedy starts getting playing cards with cryptic messages on them, in the form of addresses or clues to addresses, and when he goes and stalks the people who live there, he figures out some way they need help in their lives and helps them, thus growing in confidence as a person along the way.)

At the end he’s helped a lot of people and learned to be a better person, almost a la Bill Murray in Groundhog Day... and the only thing left is to find out who has been sending him the playing cards and orchestrating events all along. Without spoiling it, the answer is very unsatisfying and unclear. It’s almost a precursor to the narrator/character of Death in “The Book Thief” but far less defined and a bit more like “Stranger Than Fiction” in a boring way.

The other thing that kept driving my a little crazy was the fact that Ed was only 19. I felt like I was reading about a guy in his 30s. He just felt like such an Old and Jaded character, and granted some 19-year-olds have lived harder lives or whatever... but also he had his own apartment and full time job and a close knit circle of friends he met up with in person regularly... and yet it was hammered home again and again that he was a loser. A pathetic person who hadn’t accomplished anything in life and never would.

Granted, it was 2002 when this book was published. But a 19-year-old with their own apartment and job? In THIS economy? And THREE (3) IRL friends whom he gets together with on a regular basis??? Okay so he’s not having sex, big deal. This guy is a fucking success by any millennial barometer, though I suppose a 19-year-old in 2002 would be a Gen Xer?? Hmmmm no I turned 17 in 2002 and I’m a millennial so... whatever. Tangent.

Anyway, the whole book hinges on this idea that he’s a total loser and needs to learn to.... connect with people... and make a difference in the world.... and ok look I’m not saying he shouldn’t be aspiring to bigger things than being an Uber driver, but I have a 39 year old friend who is an Uber driver! And he’s a cool guy and a smart person and is valued by his friends! It’s Okay! To have! A service job! And also he’s going back to school and trying to get his life back on track and all, which is good, and I’m not saying Ed shouldn’t do the same thing or whatever. But I don’t know, this story just feels so much more like it would hit harder if the protagonist was in his mid 30s instead of 19. I just felt like telling everyone, the author included, to chill the fuck out and lay off Ed for not being the fucking poet laureate of Australia (is that a thing?) or surgeon general at 19 years old, a year after his alcoholic father died. I will say it again: JEEZUS.

Also also there’s a pretty disturbing rape plot where Ed must save a woman from her rapist husband, and I’m not gonna say that much about it beyond the fact that hopefully we, as a society, can progress past rape plots that revolve around an outside male observer. I mean, good on anyone who tries to help someone who is currently trapped in a domestic abuse situation, but the particular way that plot was handled in this story was just all kinds of gross and it gets even worse in retrospect at the end.

This post is not meant as literary criticism. I have an English degree and I know that this post would not hold up as a paper by any stretch of the imagination, it would get an F as a work of literary criticism, this is just me thinking about how I feel now versus how I felt nearly 20 years ago when I loved this book.

[ageofevermore]

Loved You Too Late

Summery: in which Daisy and Charlotte Johnson love their mother after it’s too late. 

Pairings: Charlotte Johnson x Daisy Johnson (platonic!)

Words: 5.3k

Warnings: canon violence from 7x10, definite spoilers if you haven’t seen the newest episode, death, blood, violence, brief mention of gun violence, brief mention of suicidal actions

masterlist

As a child, she would live vicariously through the animated stories she preached on the doorstep of a rundown New York orphanage. Her sisters hand was always tightly pinched between her fingers, and alone in a projected fantasy, she would paint the scene. The story always began with a reunion, the description of a women that could walk on water with eyes of pure chocolate. 

She ran with her delusions until she was sixteen years old, and the rundown streets of New York reared it's ugly head in her direction. She was a lonely kid, having nobody but her pessimistic chocolate eyed sister to confide in, and even then Daisy wasn't the best listener. She would rather be off with her head in a computer, creating algorithms that could surely incriminate them both, then paying attention to Charlotte as she pictured a day when they weren't orphans.

When the twins were twenty-two, a burning building collapsed and within the madness their eyes locked on the fragile frame of a desperate single father. Neither one of them had expected to be found out by two men in suits just hours afterwards and brought to a plane where their chosen family unknowingly awaited for their arrival.

Being twins did nothing for their similarities, or lack thereof, despite the preconceived notion surrounding same gender multiples. Charlotte was light eyed, Daisy was dark. Charlotte loved the prospect of a screen free life; Daisy spent her days trying to advance technology. What truly set the two apart was their draw to authoritative figures, and lovers.

Grant Ward was not Charlotte's cup of tea, neither was Phil Coulson. She had found quickly that she would much rather be sat in the cockpit beside a stone faced Melinda, than wandering in circles around the jet with an overexcited Coulson and brooding Agent Ward. Growing up, Daisy was the only damage control Charlotte had ever known. It wasn't often the light eyed twin got her hopes and dreams smothered beneath bad news and storm clouds, but she was easily mislead by the world and it's true intents.

When the twins were eighteen, they had been broken apart by boys and loneliness. Daisy vowed to never let her sister fall so far again, but everything had piled up quickly once they joined forces with shield. Grant Ward tried to kill Charlotte. He sent Fitz and Simmons plunging to the depths of the endless ocean. He broke Daisy's heart into a million pieces and months later had the persistence to try and win it back through pity and childhood trauma.

As if that wasn't enough to dampen the happiness Charlotte was finding with Agent May and the Shield team, her sister fell in love again and made friends with a man named Trip who only lived to see the inside of a stone cocoon before crumbling at Daisy's feet. Weeks later, with new combined powers of a hurricane, Daisy and Charlotte faced the monster of a women who had once been an angel with guarded hearts and past trauma locked away. Lincoln was a man who had lived to see the break of day above the earths surface, but like every man the twins had loved before he met an untimely death and left them with more scars to bare daily.

For a while, after the death of Jiaying at the hands of Calvin, the twins returned to their bubble of self protection. Charlotte clung to Daisy, and Daisy turned her attention to computer programing. Nothing got better for them from their, they just lived with the pain they were bound to encounter. Maybe they weren't meant to find stability or content. The life of an orphan was never one filled with sunshine, rather wilting bushes of thorns.

Never did Charlotte think her mother would be circulating the current conversation as a lively variable, but she hadn't expected to be living in 1980 either.

"--Leaving this Mallick unleashed on the world could have irreparable consequences. He's taken control of afterlife, we have to get it back." Daisy and Charlotte walked into the endings of a rant delivered by Coulson, his expression blank as he stared down at the flashing computer console.

Mack nodded in agreement to Coulson's game plan, his shoulders square and frame stood tall as he subconsciously clenched his fists. It was a sight that would have made Charlotte months ago, but that was before they were sent spiraling through space and time and forced to go through groundhogs day which only ended with the death of another friend. "Starting with his hostages."

"And protecting Jiaying at all costs." Coulson nodded to Mack's addition, neither one of them noticing how Charlotte's face fell and she desperately clutched onto the hem of her soft pink shirt. Daisy noticed her sisters apprehension though, shuffling over so their limbs were side by side and Charlotte wasn't left standing on her own feeling less then seen.

"Simmons, can you send our coordinates to her watch?" Mack asked the loyal agent, his dark chocolate gaze fixed and pointedly avoiding Charlotte's devastated features, "On it." The British agent replied with a curt glance at her best friends faces.

"I don't think it's a good idea to bring her here." Daisy stuttered, speaking up for herself and Charlotte after realizing her younger twin was shocked speechless by the rapidly declining turn of events. Charlotte was sweet, sensitive to the purest of indifference. The world was crumbling beneath her feet for the third time, but now neither Fitz or Enoch was their to ground her.

Coulson sighed, but didn't have to think about his response as he looked the twins over with paternal pain in his robotic blue eyes. "I hear you," He began, "but we can't lose anymore parents."

"This is about protecting your existence." Mack fed into Coulson's bullshit excuse, his shoulders still squared and only tensing the sadder Charlotte's light eyes got. She was the glue that held the entire operation together, and seeing her so distraught by the return of her mother who had once been a daydream and a nightmare, nobody wanted to go through with a plan that could potentially cause her harm. Especially not Coulson and May who looked at the twins as their own kids.

"Aside from May and Yo-Yo, Jiaying doesn't know us. We could minimize what we tell her. Nothing about her future, her power, or you, her--"

"Daughters?" Charlotte asked, her gaze twitching between May and Coulson who were breaking beneath the weight of her heavy sadness. Charlotte wasn't a good Agent. Not when the mission was personal, and she tended to always make things personal. She loved hard, and she felt deeply. She could turn her words to lightning, but nothing could stop the shatter of her heart every time the world worked against her.

May's sigh was audible as she looked between Charlotte and Daisy. Her lips were curled downwards, only adding to the black pit that was gnawing at not only Charlotte's nerve but her patience. "Um, Lottie, there's one other thing. At Afterlife, there was a women--"

Whatever May planned to tell the twins was drowned out by the sound of crackling electricity and a strobe of circular blue light. Charlotte gripped onto Daisy's hand, the both of them fearfully turning towards the source of intrusion. Daisy's face was completely blank whereas Charlotte's told a story of a hundred heartbreaks.

"That was fast." Jemma mumbled, coming to stand by Charlotte's side. She noticed the twins interlocked fingers, and how tightly they clung to each other, but now wasn't the time to vocalize how they weren't alone. Jemma knew all to well that in the face of trauma Charlotte and Daisy couldn't help but feel like it was them against the world.

"He's hunting us."

-

"My people need protection." Jiaying stepped forward, angling her body in a manor that protectively shielded Gordon. Charlotte flinched at the sight, not knowing her mother to be a women of such thoughtless heroism. The women she spent sixteen years animatedly dreaming about had turned into a nightmare with a murderous past. She wasn't usually one for grudges, but Jiaying didn't sit easy on her memory.

"Leave that to us." May stepped forward as well, her body not before both Daisy and Charlotte as she squared up to Jiaying. May was short, and it was comical to Charlotte how most people found her intimidating, but she didn't have the heart to smile at the sight of May being protective. She felt sick, to leave it simply.

"I don't know who you people are, and somehow you knew how to find me." Jiaying argued peacefully, her voice level and irritatingly calm. She was nowhere near the same violent women Charlotte remembered, but she still had thirty years of heartbreak and misfortune to become cold and murderous.

"We needed your help." Elena tried to reason from the staircase, her gaze pleading for cooperation on Jiaying and Gordon's behalf. "And then you led that man right to our front door!" Jiaying argued without fault, tone clenched and rightfully angered from her own unknowing perspective.

Charlotte flinched when Daisy squeezed her fingers tightly, bracing herself with the courage to speak up and converse with their mother before she becomes a monster after blood. "We're not your enemies." She tried to reason, "We save Inhumans. He wants to take their gifts. That's how he got his."

"Is that even possible?" Jiaying asked, eyes fluttered beneath the weight of Daisy's words. Charlotte, who was still shaken up and healing from their adventurous excursion shifted between her feet uneasily.

"It is." Charlotte weakly responded, looking towards the floor to avoid Jiaying's shocked expression turned in her general direction. She could feel the strings of a panic attack tightening in her stomach, and she knew the telltale signs were visible on her tense features, but now was not the time to run away and mutter breathing exercises beneath her breath. She's an agent of shield for fucks sake, she can't always run and hide.

"That could kill them." Jiaying turned to whisper to Gordon within the same beat that Yo-Yo advanced towards Coulson and Mack, "If I can get in, I can get them out without being seen. I got my power back - thanks to you."

"And if you get taken, you could lose it again, and then you give it to --" May's argument was dismantled by Coulson's thoughtless proposal, "I'll go. Scout a point of attack. You said 'be me.' This me is disposable, if I get caught --"

"You are not disposable!" Charlotte argued in the same breath as Mack, the two sharing a distraught glance when their eyes met and the weight of Coulson's words brushed against their hearts.

"Recyclable then, minimal risk." Coulson correction, and Gordon stepped forward, accepting the suggestion, "I can take him in."

"I can't allow that." Jiaying counter claimed, her eyes kind and caring as she turned towards Gordon with a look neither Daisy or Charlotte had ever personally received. The twins shuddered visible, their sadness understandable. "It's the easiest way. I know the layout. I'll drop him somewhere secret and then go." Gordon insisted.

Jiaying didn't pose another argument, though her posture quivered as she backed down from Gordon reluctantly. Mack didn't waste another moment though, shoulders squaring slightly, "Alright. We'll fly close in the Quinjet. You and Gordon drop in, do recon, and find the prisoners. Then Yo-Yo and I will go in."

"I'm going with you." Jiaying offered, stepping forward again and closer towards Mack. She was desperate at this point, clearly feeling like the world was falling apart beneath her fingertips. Charlotte wished she could sympathize, but she was overrun with petty emotions and tribulations.

"We need you alive." Coulson argued with a straight face and entangled hands. Daisy and Charlotte had still yet to let go of each others embrace, instead inching impossibly closer as the seconds ticked by and they were still stunned by their mothers soft presence. "Your people need you to lead."

"I have to get her back." Jiaying pleaded. "Kora wont listen to you. Maybe I can talk some sense into her!" Jiaying pleaded, and it was then Charlotte and Daisy noticed the glances being thrown their way. May was tense, breath hitching when Jiaying went off on her protective tangent. Elena was just looking between the women in red and the girl in pink with friendly worry.

"But if she sees you, it can provoke her. A-And then everyone's at risk." May spoke softly. It was a tone usually reserved for Charlotte, the women having a hard time turning off her emotions when in the presence of the younger Johnson twin.

"They're right. We can't risk it." Gordon blindly shook his head, tilting his chin down in the direction of Jiaying.

"I'll stay," Jiaying defeatedly surrendered, "but you have to bring back my daughter."

-

As a child, she had imagined what it would be like to reunite with her parents. She had spoken to Daisy for years about the wonder that is their mysterious history. She was sure they had family somewhere in the world, not wanting to think that they were entirely alone in the world, but she wasn't sure to what extent their bloodline ran. Never had she expected to have both a lively, and murderous, mother and father, or an older sister lost amongst time and unfortunate meetings.

"What the hell, Mel!" Charlotte cried as she followed Melinda May through the maze of computer circuits and paneling. Her eyes were brimmed with hot pools that dared to spill at a moments notice as the gears in her head continued to turn. The women she had just witnessed was in no way the same as the mother she had mourned. "Did it just slip your mind that we have a sister?"

There was a broken edge to Charlotte's question that had May faltering and spinning around on her heels. Charlotte had never been the type to demand answers, but it was clear this particular secret had struck her the wrong way. It was a side of her that nobody at Shield had ever witnessed, and May never wanted to hear that broken edge again. "We were trying not to be swallowed by a time storm."

"Were you purposefully trying to keep us in the dark?" Daisy took over, seeing the dangerous gleam of tears in Charlotte's eyes, "Is this some weird way of trying to protect us?"

"No." May breathed deeply, grabbing at Charlotte's arm and pulling the girl farther down the hallway with Daisy close behind. "No, but Kora is volatile. She already tried to kill your mother."

Daisy sighed, looking defeatedly between Charlotte and the empty space behind the lot of them, "She just never said about a sister, another kid."

"It's possible that Kora wasn't alive." May revealed, watching as Charlotte's face sunk and the tears that had gathered slipped down her cheeks like a river leading to the soft gates of heaven. "When we were at Afterlife, she stole a gun from a guard, and I think she intended to use it on herself. But Nathaniel got to her. I think in the original timeline she --"

"She went through with it." Daisy shuddered, her mind racing back to the moments in New York when Charlotte had been close to the same fate. "Which is why my mom would have left Afterlife to go do charity work and meet our dad --"

"We can't go down that hole right now, Daisy." Mack startled Charlotte as he came up behind the two of them, his eyes softening when he watched Charlie desperately shake the tears from her eyes.

"Let me go with you." Daisy projected the offer, eyes wide and hopeful at the thought of meeting said older sister.

"No." Mack shook his head before walking closer to the twins, "We need you and your mother to survive. You're staying put."

"Don't tell me it's because I'm not 100% because I feel fine." Daisy argued, looking between Mack and May with bleeding desperation, the complete opposite of what Charlotte felt. Then again to reiterate the minuscule similarities, one was dressed in soft pink and the other was clad in black leather.

"You're not going." Mack didn't back down, "This isn't time for that family reunion. We promised your mom we'd save Kora."

"If she can be saved."

-

Charlotte had been less then thrilled to be pulled away from her room by an overly anxious Daisy. She had been laying in bed paralyzed with guilt and sorrow for a few hours, feeling less then alone with the continual chimes of her wrist watch. Her team members were looking for her, and yet she didn't have the energy to face them and plaster a fake smile onto her lips as to not worry them in the moment.

Daisy hadn't told her where they were going, but her stomach was churning with common knowledge. Charlotte should have been over the moon, always having been the one to idolize a day with their mother, but knowing the course of Jiaying's life and having just barely healed from the trauma, she wasn't sure she could do it all again willingly.

"Tell me there's news." Jiaying begged the minute her unhardened chocolate eyes met the approaching frame of her twins. Charlotte was sure her face was blotchy from tears, but she had no standards for how she approached her murderous dead mother who was instead alive and kind.

"I'm sorry, nothing yet." Sousa sadly shook his head, the apology only worrying Jiaying more.

Daisy and Charlotte were frozen, childhood dreams and adult traumas collected in their vivid memory. They weren't ready for this, and yet they had no choice but to take what was given to them by the 1980's.

"I knew this was a mistake." Jiaying sighed, ringing her hands together nervously as her mind bounced between the status of Kora and Gordon. "I never should have agreed to this."

"You can trust us." Daisy promised, cutting off her nervous babble and beginning steps of a familiar pace. Charlotte did the same when she was nervous, and her chest tightened at the thought of what other traits she could share with this version of her unharmed mother.

"Trust you?" She gasped, "I don't know anything about you! And no one will tell me anything." Her voice got softer as she went, chocolate eyes growing sad at the turn of events.

"We just want to help." Charlotte softly broke to Jiaying, "Afterlife is important to us, too."

"You don't know that first thing about it." Jiaying mumbled, truly believing her words because she was equipped with no further proof or memory.

There was a beat of silence before Sousa spoke up abruptly, "They've been there." Charlotte and Daisy looked at him with wide eyes, not expecting him to openly blurt such compromising intel.

"Before your friends showed up we'd never had an outsider find us!" Jiaying argued. Sousa shook his head fondly, eyeing the twins with a smirk that held all of their worth, "They're no outsiders. Go on. Show her."

Daisy and Charlotte breathed in sharply, shaking a glance before raising their respective arms. Charlotte had always favored her left when channeling their powers, while Daisy had taken instantly to her right. With a breath Daisy rattled the glass of water sitting on the computer table, and Charlotte summoned a bolt of lightning from the electrical outlet just beyond. With another calculated exhale she shot the harvested bolt back towards the water, listening to to the sizzling crack as the water warmed and boiled, and a ring of black settled on the rim of the glass. 

"The perfect storm." Jiaying mumbled, looking over the twins with astonishment. "Where did you learn that?" She asked, looking back and forth between Charlotte and Daisy with amazement.

"From you." The older of the twins broke softly, "In Afterlife. In thirty years. We're from the future, and I know how that sounds, but its...it's the truth." Charlotte wasn't sure what she would do if Jiaying didn't believe them. It wasn't easy to go along the word of somebody who cries time traveler.

"I, um..." Jiaying looked down, closing her eyes tightly before reopening them and glancing up at Charlotte, "I had a feeling I...I knew you. There's something...so familiar. Your gift, it's a lot like...Nathaniel took that from you."

Daisy and Charlotte both nodded, "It almost killed us."

"It's knowledge of the future that lead him to us, that he used to warp Kora's mind and turn her against me." Jiaying looked down at the console of outdated computers, her kind chocolate eyes conflicted.

Charlotte stepped closer to her mother, fueling Daisy's confidence as she followed. The two had done everything together since they were babies, they'd damned if that stopped now in the presence of their mother. A mother who hadn't even birthed them yet. "Where you close with her?" Charlotte asked softly.

"Inseparable." Jiaying recalled fondly, "She clung to my leg the first three years. Shy, sweet girl."

"What changed?" Charlotte asked softly. Jiaying frowned for a moment, looking over the girl clad in pink. She was so similar to her Kora. Soft spoken, sensitive. It only amplified her feeling of familiarity.

"Terrigenesis. I thought she was ready, but, Kora lost control. There were accidents. The more I tried to help, the more she pulled away.

"That must be hard." Daisy nodded thoughtfully. Charlotte was speechless beside her sister. This was the women she had dreamed about for sixteen years. A women made of fairytales and soft chocolate eyes ready to sweep them away from the clutches of abuse and neglect. This women didn't exist anymore, tarnished by the harsh hand of murder. "Being so close to someone and not being able to reach them."

Charlotte and Daisy had unconsciously grabbed onto each other, standing before Jiaying and Sousa with entangled hands and trembling strength. "That others - they wanted her gone, but they don't see what I do. Kora has a good heart. She's worth saving."

"Well, she's lucky to have you." Daisy smiled softly, wishing that it had been her and Charlotte to experience such a tender and kind Jiaying. She envied the sister who had thrown it all away to feel powerful. "My power has allowed me to live a long life. I used to think it was my greatest gift, but I was wrong. It was her." Charlotte swore her heart stopped beating. Her face fell, the grip on Daisy's hand growing slack when she was overcome with petulant anger and jealousy for Kora. "Um, sorry. Did I say something?"

Charlotte shook her head sadly, "Growing up, we never knew our mom. And when we finally found her, she wasn't who I hoped she would be." Her eyes were glassy as Jiaying stepped forward. Charlotte fought against every natural instinct in her body, not wanting to flinch away from an embrace that had once tried to kill her but was now so sweet.

"She hurt you." Jiaying concluded, laying her palm softly against Charlotte's cheek. There was no forceful pull from deep inside of her. Her powers were still her own and the life wasn't being extracted through the soft contact. Everything about this women was different. "I can't speak to your mothers reasons, but for me, sometimes trying to do the right thing comes out all wrong."

In that moment Charlotte forgot about all the pain knowing her mother had caused. She loved this version of Jiaying, who hadn't been broken down by mass tragedy. It was a side she never thought a monster could wear, forgetting the monsters aren't born, they're made.

-

"Daisy, do you copy? Charlotte come in!"

Charlotte and Daisy scrambled for the walkie-talkie sitting on the computer console, eyes still glassy but hearts not as heavy with thick emotions of trauma. "Mel?" Charlotte answered.

"John Garrett's here with Nathaniel, and they have Gordon's powers. Get Jiaying someplace safe." May instructed, fighting off her own maternal instincts when she heard how thick and scratchy Charlotte's voice was. The poor girl thought she was good at masking how she felt, but she was still a painted cavass uncovered to the public.

"We have to go." Daisy seethed. Charlotte led Jiaying out of the room and down the hall with Daisy at her side, knowing it was better if Sousa didn't follow along. They were already a tight cluster, easily identified because of their numbers, they didn't need to put another agent in danger.

They walked briskly down the hall, trying to get their mother to safety, but that failed when Nathaniel stood in the break of a hallway dressed in his eerie black leather coat. His were tucked into his pocket, feigning innocence, but Charlotte and Daisy took no chances. The twins stepped before Jiaying, arms raised and powers at the ready to strike.

"Don't shoot." Came his monotone voice, hands raised in the air pathetically. Charlotte's eyes crackled with electricity, the soft broke of her eyes overtaken by bolts of white lightning. Charges of manifested energy crack at her fingertips, sending a warmth up her arms and down her legs. "The three of us in here, you want to bring the whole of rivers end down on our heads?"

"Give me a reason." Daisy challenged, while Charlotte just scoffed at Nathaniel. She hadn't the patience to deal with a man as entitled as himself.

"Where's Kora?" Jiaying worried for the safety of her daughter, not knowing that beside her were two of her own creations, "What have you done with her?"

"Sorry, Kora couldn't make it. But she sends her best." Nathaniel played cheekily, stepping closer to the trio who was easily on edge awaiting the next shoe to drop. "And don't you look at me like that. You still have Charlotte and Daisy. Isn't two daughters enough?"

Charlotte's strength faltered for a moment in the face of the reveal, looking over at Jiaying with worry before forcing her eyes back towards Nathaniel to avoid unnecessary heartbreak.

"Oh, you didn't know." Nathaniel laughed menacingly, watching as Jiaying stopped to fully glance at the twins. They were undeniably sisters, but the faint traces of her in their nose and lips was subtle and breathtaking, "Wow, it's like a season finale of Dallas around here."

"I'm sorry." Charlotte whispered, she wasn't even sure if Jiaying could heart her over the tremble of heartbreak in her whispered words. She was shaking her head, trying to rid the tears from around her eyes. Bolts of lightning flashed through her irises, reminding Jiaying fondly of a younger Kora. "What you said about your mother, you were talking about me." Jiaying pieced together, looking horrified by the thought.

"It's okay." Daisy nodded her head, having forgiven Jiaying hours ago. The women she had become was horrible, but it was a result of endless pain and torment. This was the mother she wanted to remember for years in advance. The mother she wanted to be for her own kids.

"I hurt you? But I would never--"Jiaying had tried to find a reason in her mind as to what could have led her down a path of such horrible actions, but Nathaniel beat her to it, "It's actually a riveting story. See, Hydra just cuts you all to bits. You're left for dead, your power stolen. That part, you all have in common now, "Nathaniel laughed menacingly, hardly caring for the violent shudder his words provoked from Charlotte of the single bolt of lightning that zapped past his head and struck the wall. "Daisy grows up alone. Sad. Charlotte tries to kill herself at fourteen. Kind of like Kora. They find you eventually, you're all militant and they're with shield."

"Stop it." Charlotte's voice trembles, her eyes pinched together tightly to prevent bolts of strategized lightning from striking Daisy and Jiaying at her sides. She usually had impeccable control, but nothing was as it should be it seems.

"You're on opposite sides." Nathaniel doesn't stop, not like Charlotte thought he would in the first place, "So you start to drain the life out of them. You almost succeeded with Charlotte too, she just had to save her big sister." He taunted Charlotte, his eyes watching as she overheated, close to combustion from how harshly she was trying to block out the memories. "It's working, you're about to kill her, but guess who steps in to crush your spine. Dear old --"

"Enough!" Charlotte and Daisy plead together. The lights flicker overhead, a bolt of lightning and crack of vibrations shooting out towards Nathaniel and knocking him on his ass. Charlotte was heaving heavily, overcome with a burning desire to set Nathaniel Mallick ablaze.

"Nice Quake! I give it a B." Nathaniel shrugged as he stood from the ground, eyes burning darkly as he stared the twins down. "Definitely room for improvement." He threw his arm out, a concentrated vibration sweeping both girls off of their feet and sending them towards the wall made of metal pipes. Charlotte squeaked as she made contact with the floor, a rim of red soaking through the soft pink of her shirt. "If you haven't done the math, I've had these powers a lot longer then you both have."

Daisy and Charlotte watched from the floor, breathing heavily as their already injured bodies tried to compensate for another harsh force. Jiaying's face hardened at the sight of blood falling from Charlotte's nose. Tightly she wrapped her hand around Nathaniel's neck when he walked past her, draining the life from his body without second thought, "Leave my daughters alone."

"Stay back. I won't say it again." Nathaniel seethed after he rammed his elbow into Jiaying's side and sent her stumbling back into the concrete of the wall. Jiaying didn't listen though, it was never her specialty, and protectively she reared forward in motherly defiance.

"Mom, no!" Charlotte gasped, but it was too late, a stream of angered vibrations was sent towards Jiaying, paralyzing her for a moment before Nathaniel smirked wickedly. Feeling the energy of the room at his fingertips, he summoned a bolt of electricity towards Jiaying. Her neck snapped to the side beneath the vibrations, and to ensure she was dead before the eyes of her daughter he struck her heart with the syphoned electricity.

Charlotte cried out painfully, writhing on the ground beside Daisy in a fit of absolute hysterics. Her fists pounded on the concrete, creating pools of blood that only smeared against her cheeks when she fervently wiped at the rivers of tears falling from her eyes. Echoing shrieks shattered Daisy's eardrums as she watched their mother fall silently. She didn't know what to say whereas Charlotte didn't know how to stop screaming.

"No!" She sobbed over and over again, startling Nathaniel who hadn't seen the girl so broken apart even with his knowledge of the future. For a minute he faltered, listening to her high pitched wails, but all it caused was a wide smirk to play on his lips when he collected his bearings. "Well, I guess she won't live forever. And you won't live at all." He smirked wickedly.

Charlotte and Daisy were overcome with grief, rising from the ground with flickering lights and rumbling floors as their entourage. Charlotte's eyes were encased with a fiery white glow, purple bolts zapping from her fingers and shocking Nathaniel. Daisy was no better, face contorted into pained concentration. Electricity cracked around them, but before they could make a calculated attack Melinda May came to their defense.

A gunshot echoed around the hall, having struck Nathaniel in the shoulder. Charlotte fell the to ground, gasping and crying out for air and for life to return to her mother. May froze for a moment, eyes watching as Charlotte Johnson broke completely, having learned to love her mother too late.

For hours they sat on the floor of the lighthouse, hands entertained as their mothers lifeless body laid in their embrace. Her eyes were a light chocolate color, void of any emotion. She never lived a life of murder and manipulation. Never was ripped apart and used by Hydra. She was an innocent claimed as collateral. She was an Inhuman, an ally, a mother.

She had once been a mother whose daughters had loved her too late.

[harrylee94]

Log Entry XXXXXX - Chapter 3

Summary: A new space station, complete with the most high spec and up to date technology there is to offer, has been set up at the edge of the known universe, a new way point for explorers to keep in contact with the rest of the human race. It has been carefully designed by the best scientists and engineers Earth could offer, and now 7 brave souls are being sent out to ensure everything works perfectly.

However, when Logan wakes from cryosleep from the journey, he is informed that several things are now in need of repair, though everything had been in perfect working condition when the station had been reconstructed before he and his crew had arrived. They will have to solve the problems they’ve been left with before the station is up and running, and yet Logan can’t help but feel he’s done this before…

Relationships: Intrulogical (Remus/Logan)

Warnings: Blood, Gore, Parasites, Remus having an overactive imagination, It’s an Among Us crossover so there will be bad stuff afoot.

A/N: This was so difficult to write, partly because I got a job, but mostly because it was emotionally draining.

For those of you who don’t know, this story is based off of a comic by @fangirltothefullest which I HIGHLY recommend you check them out on the link above! Their art is AMAZING.

Note to everyone before we begin; there will be graphic descriptions of gore, dismemberment, possibly torture, and any other awful things that come with the territory of writing a story in an Among Us universe.

Link to; Part 1 Part 2

To read it on AO3 please click here.

Chapter 3: Log Entry #3

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 6:02 AM

Logan hit the ground with a pained grunt, his shoulder having hit the ground much too hard, and he pushed and rolled himself across it until he’d plastered himself to Remus’s side. He was warm and real and here and now he was holding him. Logan curled into his chest and gripped at the skin-tight suit that Remus was wearing, stretching the fabric but not bringing himself to care as he listened to the beating of his heart.

“You only get like this after something so shitty happens that you can’t logic your way out of it,” Remus said, his fingers gently rubbing circles into Logan’s scalp.

He hummed.

“... You want to talk about it?”

“Not yet.”

“Sure. Take your time.”

Logan smiled. This is why he loved him. Remus was loud, he was gross and he was strange, his ideas bordered on the demented at times, he was intrusive and annoying… but he was also spontaneous and accepting. He could be quiet when it was needed, and he would listen with his full attention (provided he had something to keep his hands busy). He understood more than his first impression led people to believe, and he would protect Logan with everything he had.

Tears ran down Logan’s cheeks as he thought of his body, shredded and so completely empty on the ground, and he choked on a sob at the thought of him dying alone.

“Hey,” Remus said, his voice soft as he rubbed Logan’s back. “I’ve got you. It’s okay.”

Logan shook his head. “No. No it’s not.”

“Why not?”

Logan shook his head again, curling further into a ball atop him. “You… I wasn’t there.”

“Weren’t where?”

“With you.” He could remember that focus, running to the reactor, forgetting everything else. Forgetting Remus. “I left you!”

“Hey, no, I’m right here,” Remus said, kissing Logan’s hair, but Logan was all but sobbing now. “It’s okay, Ana-Logie. I’m here now.”

“But you won’t be, because I’ll leave, or I’ll look away for a second, and you’ll… you’ll…”

“Breathe,” Remus told him, pushing them both upright and cradling Logan in his lap. “Like you taught me, remember? In for four. Hold for seven. That’s it. And out for eight.”

Logan shook as he followed Remus’s instructions, struggling against his emotions, but gently, over time, they calmed to a more manageable level and his grip on Remus’s clothes loosened.

“Good,” the moustached man said, continuing to rub circles into his hair and back. “Just keep breathing.”

The scientist nodded numbly against his chest and relaxed into his hands until his shaking ceased. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“But-”

“No buts!” Remus interrupted. “Not unless it’s the sexy kind!”

Logan chuckled and set his head against Remus’s shoulder, looking up at him as he wiped at his eyes. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Remus replied, though he looked a little surprised. He had every right to be, considering Logan didn’t say those three words very often, and to have done so unprompted was unusual. “What is it? What happened?”

“You won’t believe me,” Logan said, running lines down Remus’s cheek with his fingertips.

“Try me.”

Of all the people who were with him on this shuttle, Remus was the one who would be the most likely to believe him. Not that that was any guarantee that he would. He had already wasted time with his emotional state though, so perhaps he should keep the explanation short. “... Groundhog Day meets The Thing and I’m Phil.”

Remus blinked at him a few times before his face fell. “What?”

“This… This is the third time I’ve woken up in that cryopod,” Logan said. “You’ve fallen out of your pod three times. And… and we’ve all…” He stopped, looking away. He shouldn’t have said anything. Remus didn’t believe him, and it would have been better if-

“Died?”

Remus’s soft tone -- no, more than that, it had an edge of anger, and fear -- made him turn back. There was no disbelief in his eyes, no hint of criticism or of simply trying to appease him. It almost made him tear up again, but he kept it down and nodded, not quite trusting his voice.

“... I died.”

Logan nodded again.

“We all died?”

Another nod.

Remus hummed and stroked his cheek. “Are you sure it wasn’t a dream?”

Logan’s hope crumpled and he pulled away, or at least he tried to. “Let me go.”

“No,” Remus said, holding him tighter to his chest.

“Let me go!” he exclaimed, kicking out.

“Logan, stop!” Remus cried, struggling with him. “I believe you!”

He paused. “You think it was a dream.”

“You wouldn’t have reacted like this if you didn’t know that it was real.”

“... You insulted me to check if I was genuine.”

Remus shrugged. “You don’t make up stuff like this, but we did just get out of modified freezers after sleeping for years.”

“A fair point,” Logan granted with a blush. It wasn’t like him to overlook something so simple as proof. He blamed his high emotions. “It could still be affecting me.”

“Might be,” Remus said. “Do you think it is?”

Logan frowned. “It felt so real…”

“Then it’s real until we know it isn’t,” Remus said with a decisive nod. “You said it was like The Thing?”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 6:57 AM

Strangely, Remus’s questioning had actually been quicker than the distractions he usually pulled, the kisses and delaying tactics replaced with hugs and supportive mutterings, and now the two of them were heading into the depressurisation chamber. Remus was holding both of their helmets so Logan could more properly look at his tablet, trying to find any clue in the messages they received from the construction crew of what it was that had caused this loop, or at least what these creatures were, but there had been nothing.

“And our fearless leader arrives!”

Logan looked up from the tablet to find Roman stood in the middle of the room, arms stretched out in a flamboyant and unnecessary manner.

“Aw, bro!” Remus exclaimed in return, stretching his own arms out in a mirror image of his brother. “I never thought you’d admit my superior leading skills.” He grinned as Roman physically stepped away from him with a look of disgust.

“He was talking about Logan, you unhinged octopus,” Virgil said, though he sounded more playful than biting.

Remus gasped dramatically. “How did you know I loved cephalopods?”

Both Logan and Virgil rolled their eyes and Logan nudged his partner with his elbow. “This is not how I was hoping to start the conversation.”

Remus had the courtesy to look at least a little chastised and he stepped back, allowing Logan to take the place of the ‘fearless leader’, as Roman had put it, though he was definitely not fearless so he wasn’t sure why he had said that.

“As we are all here,” he began, looking around at each of them, noting how they were all more or less where they usually were, though he did make a note that Virgil’s previous panic attacks had probably been brought on by his tardiness, “I have some news. Now please keep an open mind as I know that what I am about to say will sound rather fantastical, but I assure you that I am speaking the truth.” The others looked at him in confusion, as he’d expected they would, and he took a stabilising breath. “I have lived through this day twice, and we have all died, both times.”

The air was heavy with the silence that followed, and he tried to hold strong, but he could see the disbelief in their eyes.

“Did Green put you up to this?” Orange asked with a snort.

“That’s not funny,” Virgil muttered, and Patton moved to comfort him, sending Logan a worried look.

“What proof do you have?” Janus asked, looking amused.

“... None,” Logan admitted quietly.

“That’s because this is a useless charade,” Janus said with a wave of his hand, rising to feet. “As entertaining as it is to see you try to make a joke, perhaps next time make it something more believable.”

“I’m telling the truth,” Logan said, but even Roman had turned away. “This is serious!”

“Whatever, Blue,” Orange said, slipping his tablet into its pouch. “Can we just get started?”

Logan’s shoulders fell. He should have known that this would happen. Remus was one thing, but everyone else? He could see them losing their faith in his abilities, in his cognitive functions. His leadership was now under question.

“Are you serious?”

Logan almost jumped when Remus stepped past him, helmets now set aside, and he looked ready to tear someone limb from limb.

“Logan doesn’t lie, not even for jokes,” Remus said, his voice low and dangerous. “He’s trying to warn you guys about something and you just dismiss it outright? What the fuck?”

“Rem, don’t try it, alright?” Roman said, stepping forwards to meet him, eyebrow raised  and arms folded across his chest. “It’s sweet that you’re defending him and all, but we all know the effects of prolonged stasis.”

“We know you probably didn’t mean anything by it, Logan,” Patton said, “but-”

“He’s not lying!” Remus exclaimed, but no one was listening. “Come on! Janus!”

The man in yellow sighed. “Just get your helmet on.”

Their words stung, but Logan knew that if their positions had been reversed he would have thought the same thing. “Remus.” The man turned back to him. “It… It was a dream.”

“Logie…”

“It’s fine,” Logan said with a forced smile. “They’re right. We should just get on with things. We’re on a tight enough schedule as it is.”

Remus gave him a look that should have meant tears, he could see the heartbreak in his eyes, but he stepped closer and took Logan’s face in his hand to press a soft, gentle kiss to his lips. “I believe you,” he whispered, “even if they don’t. I will always believe you.”

Logan smiled, comforted by the support even though he knew it wasn’t enough now. “Let’s get through this.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 10:15 AM

Virgil, Janus and Orange had all headed off in the same directions they had the previous times they had entered this place, their expertise leading them to very specific locations, but Roman had decided to go to Shields while Patton accompanied Virgil in the Medbay, something that Logan would not have chosen but they had all decided to make the decision themselves, since they ‘wanted Logan to take it easy’. In other words, they had decided that Logan’s skills and intelligence had been compromised.

Remus, who would have usually headed straight to the central control panel in the Weapons room, had been helping Logan sort out the oxygen filter, and they were now sitting side by side, the tasks in the room complete and their helmets resting in their laps.

“They weren’t going to believe us,” Logan was saying. “When it comes to anything outside of my area of expertise they don’t listen. The only reason I was named leader was because I knew so much about the mission. Roman probably would have been chosen otherwise.”

“That princess wouldn’t know the first thing about leading a mission like this,” Remus said with a snort. “He’d have led us all into a black hole to be strung out into wires thinner than a hair, or crashed us into an asteroid, or a planet. Maybe even a star.”

“He’s not quite as bad as that,” Logan said with a chuckle. “He’s actually quite competent, when he needs to be.”

“Well they’re still all a burning bag of dicks for not listening.”

Logan hummed. “We might have scared Virgil enough to keep him from entering, and maybe even Patton, but everyone else… Even proof wouldn’t have made much of a difference.”

Remus looked like he wanted to argue, but instead puffed out his cheeks and slunk further down against the wall, releasing the air as a fart noise. “Our friends suck.”

“They are being practical,” Logan pointed out. “If this were any other situation I would commend them for not trusting my word.”

“But it’s not any other situation.”

“No, it’s not.”

“It fucking sucks worse than an elephant giving you a wet willy.”

“... Elephants don’t have fingers.”

Remus shrugged and leaned into Logan’s side to rest his head on his shoulder, which was enough of an invitation for Logan to rest his own on top.

“You said it was Orange first, right?”

“I did.”

“Do you want to see if we can try and save him?”

Logan turned his head to regard his partner more critically, but, again, he seemed entirely genuine.

“Wouldn’t hurt to try.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 10:22 AM

“I really don’t need any help,” Orange said as he continued to work on the reactor. “Aren’t there any other tasks that need doing? I’m sure the list was long enough to keep us all busy for several more hours yet.”

“There certainly is an abundance of tasks that need to be done,” Logan agreed, fingers twitching with the need to adjust his glasses but he and Remus had donned their helmets again before they had left the oxygen room. “However, I believe it would be more… socially fulfilling if we completed tasks together.”

“He means it’ll be more fun if we worked together,” Remus said, though why he felt the need to clarify, Logan was unsure.

Orange hummed. “Well, I’ll be needing some fuel soon, and I think I saw the tank in Storage,” he said, closing a panel and pressing a few buttons. “If you get me about ten gallons then I’ll have this done in no time.”

“Great!” Remus exclaimed and grabbed Logan’s hand to pull him away before the scientist had a chance to protest. “We’ll be back before you can say ‘mouldy entrails’!”

“Whatever,” Orange said, still concentrating on the panel before him.

“I thought we were going to stay close to him,” Logan said once they were out of earshot.

Remus shrugged. “You said he always died in Storage.”

“I did.”

“So that means that whatever cuts his chest open does it there.”

“That might be true, but that does not guarantee that it will be the same this time.”

“You said it has the last two.”

They pulled to a stop next to the fuel tank as Logan shook his head.

“Things have already changed,” he said as Remus found an empty fuel container to fill up. “Patton has never gone with Virgil before, Roman hasn’t gone to work on the shields, I’ve never told-”

“Hey, cool your jets, Wall-E,” Remus said, catching Logan’s hands in his before Logan had the chance to pull out his tablet to go over everything he could on there, to find something to try and make some sense out of everything. “Everything’s going to be fine. We’ll get through this, yeah?”

Logan took a deep breath and nodded.

“Great. Now let’s get this stuff to Orange, yeah?”

“Yes,” Logan agreed and looked around for a second container, only to find the surprising sight of a man in cyan blue stood near the door. “Patton! I thought you were going to stay with Virgil.”

For a moment their navigator said nothing, and Logan started to wonder why he looked so stiff, but then he relaxed, his body language becoming something much more soft and familiar.

“I was, but now we’re waiting for some of the samples to process,” Patton explained. “He’s staying in the Medbay but I wanted to see how everyone was doing! I see you two aren’t fueling around!”

“Yes,” Logan said, unimpressed by the pun, though Remus snickered. “Well, thank you for checking on us.”

“No problem!” Patton said, rocking back on his heels before heading on. “I’ll go check how Janus is doing. See ya!”

“Bye Pat!” Remus called after him with a wave. Logan watched after him with suspicion for a few moments more but still collected the container and brought it back to Remus.

“I think they got him.”

Remus blinked at him. “They who?”

“The… The Things,” Logan replied, unsure what else to call them. He should have thought of it before; it had always been Roman and Virgil, and they had always gone to Medbay. Medbay wasn’t safe, and now Patton had been caught. “I’m such an idiot.”

“Wait, Patton?”

“Yes!”

Remus stared up at him, his eyes growing wide. “Janus.”

They dropped the containers without a second thought and sprinted after Patton, skidding around corners until they reached the Communications room. As luck would have it, Roman had been near the corridor and the commotion had caught his attention.

Patton had turned back to look at them all in surprise, or rather the creature that had taken Patton’s form had, as there wasn’t a shadow of a doubt that this wasn’t their lovable father friend anymore. No, this thing’s arms had been buried deep inside of Janus’s chest, one sharp tentacle-like appendage having exited his back with a small number of vertebrae clutched in its grasp, and the other coming out of Janus’s mouth.

Bits of spinal cord dropped to the floor from within the vertebrae, landing with a squelch in a pool of gathering gore, and a few moments later Janus’s limp body joined it. The three of them watched in horrified fascination as the creature’s appendages morphed back into Patton’s suit covered arms, and the blood covering them seeped into the fabric, removing all evidence of the brutal murder it had just commited.

“Whoops,” Thing-Patton said with a shiver inducing smile. “Looks like I should have been more careful!”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 10:35 AM

Patton was struggling in Remus’s grasp, kicking and wiggling and hissing as everyone left alive stood around the table in the cafeteria. Logan’s heart hadn’t stopped racing since Remus had charged towards the creature that had torn through flesh and bone and tackled it to the ground. He was still holding back his panic at the thought that he was holding it with his bare arms with no protection against being slaughtered in front of everyone.

“What the hell is going on?” Orange demanded, as Remus struggled with Not-Patton for a moment and was forced to push him down against the table. “Green!”

“He… It… The thing that looks like Patton killed Janus!” Roman explained, going to join his brother to hold the Thing down. “We saw it!”

“Let me go!” Not-Patton shouted. “You’re hurting me!”

“What do you mean, ‘Patton killed Janus’?” Virgil asked, looking like he wanted to jump in to help, but Logan had set himself between them. He knew what Virgil had become.

"It's not Patton!" Remus exclaimed grunting when Patton swung his head back into his nose but never once losing his grip. Perhaps all those scraps were good for something after all. "Fuck! He killed Janie! He’s dead! He’s dead God damn it! You tore him to fucking shreds!"

Logan so desperately wanted to go to his side, to wipe the tears that were falling down his cheeks, but he had to stay here. He had to protect them from Virgil too, or all of this would have been for nothing.

“He’s not the one with blood all over him!” Virgil declared, waving at Remus’s gore covered suit. “How do we know it wasn’t you?”

“Purple’s got a point,” Orange conceded with a nod, and Not-Patton smiled.

“Yes! Thank you, Orange!” the creature said, still struggling.

“No!” Roman exclaimed. “I don’t know what you are or what you did to Patton, but we saw what you did.”

“But Remus-!” Virgil began but Logan cut him off.

“Do you honestly think that all three of us would lie to you about this?” he asked, waiting for a few moments before continuing when no answer was forthcoming. “I don’t know how, but this… this thing is able to absorb… blood through the suit.”

“That’s ridiculous!”

“Oh I wish it was.”

Virgil looked between the three of them, looked at Not-Patton who was struggling under the twins’ weight, then over at Orange who was considering Patton with suspicion. “You can’t seriously think they’re telling the truth!”

“All three of them are corroborating the same story,” Orange said.

“Orange, no,” Not-Patton begged, and Logan had to force himself not to look at it when he heard the wetness of its voice. “Please. Please! I didn’t do it!”

Orange’s expression twitched. “What are we supposed to do with him?”

“Orange!” Virgil cried, but Logan couldn’t help but feel relieved.

“We could throw him out the garbage chute,” Remus suggested as he and Roman kept a tighter hold on the squirming body beneath them.

Roman stared at him. “You want to pull a HAL 9000 and vent him into space?”

“He just tore my best friend up from the inside out in front of our eyes!” Remus all but screamed in his face. “He pushed pieces of his spine out through his back! There were pieces of his liver and pancreas all over the floor! He’s got fucking tentacles for arms!”

Roman continued to stare at him in silence for a few seconds, at his red rimmed eyes and wet cheeks, then he nodded slowly.

“I can’t believe I’m agreeing to this,” Orange said, but he also nodded in agreement, though he looked severely conflicted. Not that Logan could blame him; it still looked like Patton after all.

“What?!”

Logan spun around, holding his tablet out in some poor excuse of a shield as Virgil charged at him, only to get pulled to a halt by Orange.

“You’re all crazy!” Virgil screamed at them as Roman and Remus started to drag a wailing Not-Patton towards the garbage chute. “You’re crazy!”

“Logan, the door,” Roman said, and Logan headed to the panel to open it.

The door to the dumping ground hissed open and Not-Patton’s cries only grew in volume as Virgil continued to shout and scream at them to stop. The twins struggled to shove the Thing into the alcove, and it tried to cling onto Roman before Remus batted it away, and then Logan shut the door.

There was a lever that needed to be pulled to activate the venting, one that had to be held down to keep the hatch open, and it burned at Logan’s fingers through the suit. He could hear Not-Patton banging on the doors, Virgil screaming behind him, Roman trying not to throw up as he held back sobs…

“Logan.”

He shut his eyes and gritted his teeth, Remus’s hand falling on his shoulder. “I…”

“Let me.”

He shook his head, but still he couldn’t move. He was frozen, stuck, unable and yet knowing he needed to. “I can’t.”

Remus’s hand covered his, fingers curling slowly through his own. “Let me.”

Logan took a deep, shaking breath, forcing the noises around them away, and swallowed as he let his arm drop, leaving only Remus at the lever. Much as Logan had done, Remus hesitated, but it was only that, a hesitation.

The banging fell into silence as the chute emptied, its contents emptying out into the void of space as Remus held the lever for five seconds, ten, twenty…

“Remus,” Logan said softly as he touched his partner’s arm, then up to his wrist until he could peel his fingers from the lever. Once they had come loose it was like a chord had been cut and he dropped to his knees, clutching at Logan’s hand as he held his head with the other.

“I killed him.”

“No!” Logan insisted, kneeling before him to hold him, even as he kept an eye on Virgil, who looked stunned. “That wasn’t Patton anymore. It wasn’t even human.”

Remus choked on his tears and gripped Logan’s back.

“We did the right thing,” Roman said as he slid closer, sliding his fingers into his brother’s hair.

“The right thing sucks,” Remus said into Logan’s shoulder, but eventually raised his head enough to smile at his twin. “Thanks bro.”

“No problem,” Roman said, and he leaned closer to press his forehead to Remus’s.

It was a beautiful moment, one that didn’t happen nearly enough between the siblings, but in the moment of distraction Logan had taken his eye off of Orange and Virgil. He should have known better. He was doing so many things wrong!

Lights flashed overhead, an alarm blared, and all three of them looked up, drawn from their moment of solidarity.

“The reactor,” Orange said and took off running, Virgil following soon after, and Logan scrambled to his feet.

“Virgil,” he said, pulling Remus up. “He’s the other one.”

“What?” Roman said, only to have to catch up with them as they  headed towards the reactor. “Other one of what? What are you talking about?”

“It’s the Thing, Roman,” Remus explained simply, “except this time there are two, and we only got one of them.”

“That’s-!” Roman started, only to cut himself off, no doubt thinking of what he’d witnessed. “What are we going to do?”

“Stop him.”

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 10:51 AM

They had been too late. Orange had been bleeding out on the floor and Virgil nowhere to be seen when they had arrived, the countdown bringing them closer and closer to the end of everything. They had stabilised the core as quickly as possible, but now they were walking around the station like a tiny waddle of emperor penguins in the dead of winter, jumping at every little sound. Logan was disgusted with himself for making so many mistakes, for not being strong enough to do what had to be done. Now there were only three of them left, and he had a feeling that it would only be a matter of time before that number went down to zero.

“He’s got to be in the vents,” Remus said, glaring at the grate in the corner of the cafeteria, shifting the pipe he’d picked up in his hand. “This is turning into an Alien movie.”

“There’s only one or two survivors in most of those!” Roman hissed in complaint. “I’d rather not have that happen. Four is plenty enough already.”

“I don’t think we’ll get much of a choice in that,” Remus said. “Whatever happens, next time, we do something different.”

“Next time?”

Remus looked back at Logan as dread started to build in the scientist’s gut. “Groundhog Day, you said.”

“Remus,” Logan said, reaching for him, and catching his hand.

“If we lose, you have to warn me next time,” he said, only sparing a few moments to watch him before turning back to keep watch. “You have to let me help you, alright? I know what you’re like.” He smirked. “You can be as stubborn as a crocodile chowing down on a wildebeest.”

“This isn’t a game, Remus,” Logan said. “Losing you -- losing any of you -- hurts.”

“What the hell are you guys talking about?” Roman asked.

“He already told you, and you called him a liar.”

“He…” Roman blinked. “You can’t have lived through today already. That’s impossible.”

“I know,” Logan agreed, “and if I wasn’t living it I would agree with you.”

“But-”

The lights started flashing again.

“Oxygen,” Logan muttered as he looked at the light. “Two locations. We won’t be able to fix it in time if we don’t split up.”

Remus nodded. “I’ll take the one in Admin, you two take the other.”

No. No, he couldn’t let Remus go on his own. He couldn’t do that. He couldn’t let him die alone. He wouldn’t-

All thoughts in Logan’s head screeched to a halt as Remus pulled him in for a deep, needy kiss. A last kiss.

“I love you,” the love of his life said before he pulled away.

Logan didn’t get the chance to call after him, Roman dragging him towards the oxygen room before he could even breathe. He wouldn’t have been able to say anything though; he felt too numb, knowing Remus was doing this, even though he knew the consequences.

As they entered the room he headed over to the panel next to the filter, entering the code to fix it… and the countdown didn’t stop for a moment.

“... He didn’t make it,” Roman murmured, and as the numbers dropped lower and lower Logan took his hand, squeezing tight as the air thinned, as spots appeared in his vision, as he became dizzy and dropped to his knees. Wheezing, he pressed close to the warm body beside him as consciousness finally slipped through his finger.

_______________________________

Stardate: October 17th XX20. 6:00 AM

The light of the cryodeck grew brighter beyond Logan’s closed eyes as he steadily awoke, his fingers curling. He waited in silent hope for several long and dragging seconds until he heard the familiar sound of Remus falling out of the cryotube. He didn’t know whether to laugh in relief or cry, knowing now that he would have to live through everything all over again.