#hardly-questionable

[maesonc-artistic-adventures]

Awkward family portraits

[windwenn]

POV ur being judged by a teenager objectively cooler than u wyd

[rebouks]

Previous // Next

Courtney: I thought you’d quit again? Oscar: No one likes a quitter, Cookie. [Courtney hummed in faint disapproval] Oscar: I could take up some more nefarious things instead? Courtney: Yeah, no. … Oscar: What’s on your mind? Courtney: This n’ that. Oscar: Do I gotta tickle it out of you? ‘Cause I’m still due a little payback. Courtney: [sighs] I’ve been thinking about trying to find out who my parents were. Oscar: Seriously? Courtney: Maybe, yeah. Oscar: Wha-… Courtney: I don’t wanna talk about it. Oscar: Bu-… Courtney: Nope.

[thii-nii]

Love is like a poison (2024) 毒恋～毒もすぎれば恋となる～

Episode One.

[angryricepudding]

Vic Sage and Danny Fenton because I'm still in that dp x dc phase

Mr. Sage is in dire need of sleep, which to a hypocritical Danny, is unacceptable

[deliriousblue]

i am fascinated by the latest episode of break up service and its take on shipped pairs. recapping for context:

ice and mocha are BL actors who are popular but haven't done a show in two years, since their breakout success in a suspiciously familiar-sounding series. ice is leaning hard into fanservice (to the point of saying 'we're a real couple, not an imaginary/shipped one'); mocha is uncomfortable with this.

it's revealed that mocha has a secret real-life boyfriend, who he has to hide due to being in a shipped pair. mocha plans to end his contract and leave his partnership with ice, so he can go public with his real relationship.

ice hires boss and jued to ensure that mocha stays in the partnership with him. they send photos of him and his boyfriend to the director who'd cast him in a movie; when confronted mocha says that his real relationship shouldn't be relevant to his career, and he doesn't want to keep hiding it for fanservice.

however, the director tells him that if he's not interested in doing fanservice (and therefore keeping any real relationship a secret), he isn't right for the role.

in the end mocha stays in the partnership with ice; his boyfriend breaks up with him for choosing his career over their relationship.

so there are a few different concepts around fanservice the episode is playing with: the constraints it puts on actors and their potential real-life relationships; the degree to which it's prioritized over or less respectable than "real" acting; the tradeoffs between fame and authenticity.

these dynamics are complex! gmmtv has a specific model built strongly around shipped pairs and fanservice, which is common in thai BL but not universal. it certainly is interesting that shipping and fanservice are explicitly framed as making an actor seem less respectable (by drawing focus away from the parts they play) but also desirable for fame and in many cases even explicitly required by the production company.

notably: homophobia is absent from this story. mocha dating a man is slightly plot-relevant (it takes them a little longer to figure it out, and boss rather than jued ends up being the one to try to seduce the boyfriend/take incriminating photos) but the tradeoffs of fanservice explicitly (supposedly) exist in the same form regardless of the gender of his costar.

and...i just fundamentally do not think that that's accurate. i think it does, actually, matter that the person mocha is dating is a man (which is not to say the pressure to hide the relationship wouldn't exist regardless). i think the expectations around fanservice are, actually, different (at least in gmmtv's model, which this episode is explicitly paralleling).

and it was jarring to have these questions of legitimacy and (frankly) closeting brought up in a context that cannot acknowledge the ways homophobia and stereotypes around queerness influence BL fanservice (and a component of why people might keep relationships either private or unremarked upon in public).

anyway none of this is exactly the point of the episode (which is a breakup-of-the-week style plot) and i certainly don't mean to take it seriously as anything like an official stance. but i do think while the meta commentary is intriguing it suffers from not actually being willing to be meaningfully self-critical.

[lord-squiggletits]

I think the key component to my personal reading of post-Delphi Pharma is that he's trying to be a horrible person on purpose. Not "on purpose" in the way that people have free will to exercise their own choices, but in that Pharma's "mad doctor" persona is a performance he puts on to deliberately embrace how much everyone else hates him. Basically, if people already think you're a "bad Autobot" and a horrible doctor who just kills his patients for fun, why try to prove otherwise to people who have already made up their minds about you? Just fully embrace the fact that people see you as an asshole. Don't try to change their minds. Don't plead for their forgiveness or understanding. Just stop caring. If you're going to be remembered as a monster, you might as well be a memorable monster, and eke as much pleasure and hedonism as you can out of it before karma catches up to you and you inevitably crash and burn.

I mean, I guess you could just go the route of "Oh, Pharma was always a fucked up creepy guy and Delphi was just him taking the mask off," but I really don't like that interpretation because, for one, it feels really wrong to take a character like Pharma becoming evil under duress and going, "Oh well clearly he did the things he did because he was evil all along," as if somehow Pharma breaking under blackmail/torture/threat of horrible death was a sign of him having poor moral character. As opposed to, you know, suffering under the very real threat of horrible death for himself and everyone he cares about while being manipulated by a guy who specializes in psychological torture.

The second reason is that it just doesn't make sense to write Pharma as having been evil all along. I mean...

Occam's Razor says that the best argument is the one with the simplest explanation. Doesn't it make way more sense to take Pharma's appearances in flashbacks, his friendship with Ratchet, his stunning medical accomplishments, and the few we see of him speaking kindly/sympathetically (or in the least charitable interpretation, at least professionally) towards his patients and conclude "This guy was just a normal person, if exceptionally talented." Taking all of these flashback appearances at face value and assuming Pharma was being genuine/honest is a way simpler and more logical explanation than trying to argue that Pharma for the past 4 million years was just faking being a good doctor/person. I mean, it's possible within the realm of headcanon, but the fact is Pharma's appearances in the story are so brief that there simply wasn't room in the story for there to be some sort of secret conspiracy/hidden manipulation behind why Pharma acted the way he did in the past.

I just can't help but look at things like Pharma's friendship with Ratchet (himself a good person and usually a fine judge of character) and the fact that even post-Delphi, pretty much every single mention of Pharma comes with some mention of "He was a good doctor for most of his life" or "He was making major headways in research [before he started killing patients]" which implies that even the Autobots themselves see Pharma's villainy as a recent turn in his life compared to how for "most of his life" he "used to be" a good doctor.

And although Pharma doesn't know this, we as the readers (and even other characters like Rung) know about Aequitas technology and the fact that it actually works, so... if Pharma really was an unrepentant murderer, why couldn't he get through the forcefield too? The Aequitas forcefield doesn't require that a person be completely morally pure and free of wrongdoing or else how could Tyrest get through, just that they feel a sense of inner peace and lack feelings of guilt. Pharma has murdered and tortured people by this point, and put on quite a campy and theatrical show of how much he sees it as a fun game, so why then can he not get through?

It circles back to my headcanon at the start of this post that the "mad doctor" persona is just that-- a persona. Delphi/post-Delphi Pharma's laughing madman personality is just so far removed from every flashback we saw of him and everything we can infer based on how other people see/saw him before that, to me, the mad doctor act is (at least in large part, if not fully) a persona that Pharma puts on to put his villainy in the forefront.

To avoid an overly simplistic/ableist take, I don't think Tarn tortured Pharma into turning crazy. To me, it's more like the constant pressure of death by horrific torture, the feeling of martyrdom as Pharma kept secret that he was the only one standing between Delphi and annihilation, the physical isolation of Messatine as well as the emotional separation from Ratchet, being forced to violate his medical oaths (pretty much the only thing Pharma's entire life has been about), etc. All of that combined traumatized Pharma to the point that the only way he could avoid cracking was to just stop caring about all of it. Because at least then, even if he's still murdering patients to save Delphi from a group of sadistic freaks, Pharma doesn't have to feel guilty and sick about doing it. As opposed to the alternatives, which were probably either going off the deep end and killing himself to escape, or confessing to what he did and getting jailed for it.

In that light, Pharma becoming a mad doctor makes sense. It avoids the bad writing tropes of "oh this character who was good his entire life was actually just evil and really good at hiding it" as well as "oh he got tortured and went crazy that's why he's so random and silly and killing people, he's crazy" and instead frames Pharma's evil as something he was forced into, to the point where in order to avoid a full psychological breakdown and keep defending Delphi, he just had to stop caring about the sanctity of life or about what other people might think of him.

Then, of course, the actual Delphi episode happens, and Pharma's own lifelong best friend Ratchet basically spits in his face and sees him as nothing more than a crazy murderer who went rogue from being a good Autobot. Then Pharma gets his hands cut off and left to die on Messatine. At that point, Pharma has not only been mentally/emotionally broken into losing his feelings of compassion, he's received the message loud and clear: He is alone. Everyone hates him. Not even his own best friend likes him any more. No one even cared enough about him to check if he actually died or not. He will only ever be remembered as a doctor who went insane and killed his patients.

So in the light of 1. Having all of your redeeming qualities be squeezed out of you one by one for the sake of survival and 2. Having your reputation and all of your positive relationships be destroyed and 3. People only know/care about you as "that doctor who became evil and killed his patients" rather than the millions of years of good service that came before.

What else is there to do but internalize the fact that you'll forever be seen as a monster and a freak, and embrace it? People already see you as a murderer for that blackmail deal you did, so why not become an actual murderer and just start killing people on a whim? People already see you as an irredeemable monster who puts a stain on the Autobot name, so why beg for their forgiveness when you could just shun them back? You've already become a murderer, a traitor, and a horrible doctor, so what's a few more evil acts added to the pile? It's not like anyone will ever forgive you or love you ever again.

Why care? Why try to hold on to your principles of compassion, kindness, medical ethics, when an entire lifetime of being a good person did nothing to save you from blackmail and then abandonment? Why put yourself through the emotional agony of feeling lonely, guilty, miserable, when you could just... stop caring, and not hurt any more?

[drkcatt]

>>🌟 NEW COMIC SERIES: HEAR / FEEL / THINK / ANSWER 🌟<<

Shortly after the Scions' return to the Source after their time in the First, Krile receives a mysterious missive from Hydaelyn with a perplexing message: Minfilia awaits. Pulling the former antecedent from the Lifestream, Minfilia now finds herself with a second chance after her divine duty-- and she isn't quite sure where she fits into this story anymore. Her return has left everyone with countless questions, and she wants answers.

Hi everyone !! so... it's been a long time coming. I'm making an official collection and attempt at making my Minfilia Comes Back AU, which is my own version of canon, into a comic series to share with everyone. This series is a side passion project and will vary in page quality with the main goal of sharing the story. Pages will also be in the vertical scroll format, and hosted on Comicfury! This comic assumed the reader is familiar with MSQ past Patch 5.3 and will contain spoilers!

The first update will be *coming soon,* for now there is the cover, a small explanation post, and the 11 page "burial" comic that flags the beginning of the AU.

Check out the comic site >>HERE<<

[goddessofroyalty]

jayce and ximena are the ones who worry the most about naph seemingly not gaining enough weight (cause jayce was a big baby lbr) but with viktor not nursing you KNOW silco is side eyeing him (as any parent would, esp those two cause they fight over nothing lmao) even though silco knows perfectly well that naph got those genes from HIS side of the family. viktor was the same as a baby and he was nursed, silco just likes being a pedantic bastard and saying 'i told you so'. hes not a perfect parent ┐(￣ヘ￣)┌

The doctors keep assuring Jayce (and Viktor) that Naph is hitting all his developmental milestones exactly as he should be. Their concerns before he was born because of Viktor's health amonted to nothing. He's just a small baby. So Jayce logically knows Naph is fine (and he's told his mom that as well) but they do keep trying to encourage Naph to eat more because he's so tiny and Jayce himself was a chubby big baby.

The thing is Naph is actually doing better than Viktor did when he was first born (partially because Naph and Viktor aren't living surrounded by toxic everything like Viktor and Silco were, partially because Silco was probably somewhat melnurished as well when Viktor was born so probably not producing the best breastmilk in the world / a whole lot of it). It's also being like 25+ years since Viktor was born so Silco isn't that aware of how Naph is doing better it seems to be the same (apart from small things like Naph is a less fussy baby than Viktor but that could just be baby temperment).

None of those facts are stopping him from side-eyeing Viktor a bit. And making little comments. Because he is absolutely not the perfect parent (not by far, he loves his kids and has done pretty well with them all things considered with the situation they're in but he is honestly a bit of a problematic parent). Viktor isn't bothered by them at all (other than annoyed snarking back) - Naph's fine, the doctors have said multiple times Naph is a perfectly healthy baby (which is better than could have been said for Viktor when he was a baby). Silco can have whatever opinion he wants Viktor doesn't care.

[beatriceportinari]

Another year, another outfit to die in! Happy birthday again Izuna!!!!!!

Like last year, I played with someone else's lines for these charming patterns, thank you so much Lena @elhnrt ! I had a ton of fun :D

Check the readmore for pattern references and explanations, there are some easter eggs in there :)

(x,x,x,x)

My goal for this piece, in addition to playing with patterns and textures and adding some Naruto references, was to add as many death flags as possible.

The idea of having Izuna in a fireman's coat is obviously not from me. I've always like the idea of Uchihas in fire resistant clothes, and the opportunity for a thick texture alongside a reversible double pattern is very appealing. I used the image of the second reference as a base, with skulls on one side and stylized lightning patterns on the other (visible inside the sleeves and collar). Both were common immagery of firemen coats.

The actual skull pattern is taken from the third reference. I'd seen this one before and before even learning anything abt it it was too beautiful to pass up. Those white and navy gradients are absolutely delightful and I enjoyed using my gel pens for them very much.... This particular type of imagery with skulls and bones in a field is called Nozarashi, inspired by Buddhist representation of death and transience.

The lightning pattern itself is a reference to water and lightning dragons :) Like Tobirama's iconic jutsu, it's one of the hints of what's abt to happen to our little guy. The scabbard is also decorated with dragon motifs for the same reason.

The background pattern is taken from the first reference, another fireman's coat with an illustration of Raijin, the thunder god. He is often representated with drums decorated with tomoes. It works nicely as a standard looking sharingan illustration, with a reference to Tobirama's hiraishingiris with the thunder imagery, like the thunder patterns inside the coat.

If you're interested in this I recommend the book linked in the second reference! It is entirely about skeleton motifs in japanese clothing of the early 20th century.

[merchant-wizard-and-jerry]

“SHOP IS OPEN”

1 - eternal torch - 3 currency

2 - Kingseeker eye - 10 currency

3 - vial of fire mana - 20 currency

4 - Cactus - 1 currency

5 - potion of translation - 70 currency

6 - potion of reverse fact - 260 currency

7 - magic orb - 30 currency or story of a new wizard

"Salt for sale"

[locke-esque-monster]

I feel like we don't talk nearly enough about how interesting "Houses of the Holy" is as a Supernatural episode. Because a lot of it is a template to where the show will be in a couple seasons, when at the time it was written, angels weren't in the show's plans.

And sure, this is the episode that foreshadows Sam pointing at something just behind Dean and confirming it's Michael. And that alone is a delight.

But let's talk about other interesting aspects of the episode:

The origin of Dean's skepticism of faith from all the evil he's seen from the age of 4 on, contrasted with Sam's desire to hold onto faith so he can be saved due to his link to the YED.

Dean and Sam's argument about faith and things you can see and believe in that has a lot in common with the one in 4x2.

Sam desperately wanting angels to fix problems or redeem him. And him being disappointed in the reality of that, a lot like 4x7.

Dean's argument of how he knows nothing is watching over them because all you can count on is evil and chaos is the root of his fight with Cas in 4x2.

Then there's the fact that Sam is judging Dean for his pursuit of pleasure. Despite that, Sam feels he's the one that needs saving. And Dean despite his love of vice, is the stand-in for the angels. He's the avenging angel of this episode, making sure the woman is okay and chasing after the bad buy. And he literally says he's watching over Sam at the end to reassure him when Sam is hurt because this wasn't an angel case. Dean doesn't think there are real angels around, but he's determined to be the angel in someone else's life - whether it be Sam's or someone else's.

And then there's the way the bad guy is killed with a pole at the end, "Final Destination" style. I can't help but wonder, did the angels do that? We spent a whole episode talking about faith. Was this to test the boys and see how they'd react to angels a little before they gear up for Sam's death at season's end? And long term, feel them out before they put their plan into action for the apocalypse? Was Father Gregory something they "helped along" somehow to lure the boys to town? There's a theory Gabriel lured them to scope them out in "Tall Tales" a couple episodes later. Who's to say the angels didn't do the same thing (maybe even inspiring Gabe)? Or perhaps the angels just take advantage of the situation since they were already watching the boys long-term? And moving the pole was as much to protect Dean as it was to see his reaction and if that would sway his lack of faith? Or was an angel (like Cas) watching over Dean and interfered to ensure his safety in the car chase? And maybe even wanted to show off a little?

I don't know. But it sure is fun to contemplate.

[the-actual-ocean]

Ocean Announcement:

I'm better than Juno. When he's dying, he doesn't post. When I'm dying, I post alot.

[badgopher]

Friday

"Does table salt go bad" and "first amendment text" and "richmond virginia suburbs" and other things I've asked the Internet this week.

It was almost warm enough a couple days this week to make park days a thing. I tried. My toes got cold.

I think banning TikTok as it exists today is probably a good idea, but the law to effect that change seems to be in conflict with the first bullet point in the bill of rights. If we lived in a time where precedent mattered, I might be more bothered about how this all plays out. Will the government give TikTok assurances they wont enforce the law that the government enacted to oust them? Who knows. Does it matter? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ At the end of the day, I think I'm mostly just sad about my TikTok (maybe?) going away.

Booked a trip to (the suburbs of) Richmond, VA for the middle of February. A couple nights in Tuckahoe and a couple in Chester. Mostly just a vibe check. I'm hoping to settle on a plan by early March.

[work stuff.]

Rachel Platten is coming to town in March and it took me all of about 12 seconds to buy a ticket this morning, even though I haven't listened to her music in ages.

I have so many pictures to sort through and scan. And a bunch of laundry to fold.

Maybe this weekend.

It could happen.

[smoozie]

Okay I want to say, I LOVED this gimmick. It was cute and fun, gave everyone some more resources to prep with and (for the most part) didn't have too deadly of consequences (from the povs I've seen). The most interesting part, however, was just what questions the ccs did and did not know.

I was justing thinking about this the other day, ironically. I think a lot of people assume the ccs remember a lot more of the series than they do simply because they lived through it, but I think the fans in general are more aware of things because we tend to rewatch seasons. And that was proven correct today. Most ccs play through a series and forget most of the details right afterward.