#how many pictures of me done by paparazzi and me in public with my brother and if it were fans it would be different

[cowvboyenema]

a little haunted by how many pictures of me at my funeral are going to be of me in movies

[lillian-nator]

Everything below was made by Me, Eye, and Ethan over the course of like 3 days

Thank you (with additions from sleepy my beloved)

Like

Okay

So

Wilbur isn’t the oldest

Techno is

But it’s a war run empire, they take pride in their troops and armies and triumphs

The soldiers come first

So Techno is the commander in chief , the general

Wilbur, second born

Is heir to the throne

To the diplomatic side of the empire

and Tommy Gets shit

He doesn’t even understand why Phil had another kid

Of course there is the situation where Techno or Wilbur dies, or one of them steps down, but it won’t happen

Was he really born to be the understudy

he was born as a backup

Tommy was an accident but they’re not gonna let the public know that

like he's the Zuko

Phil doesn't really pay attention to him so his mother picks up the slack

Wilbur is 21

Techno’s 23

Tommy’s 17

However I have a really good idea for prince Tommy, just like what if he doesn’t like the way that people treat him? Like he doesn’t want all these yes men he wants to be he wants to be told now, he want somebody to tell him he that’s against the rules he just wants him like structure he just want someone to hate him he want someone to not like him and say no and tell him that he’s stupid which is why he does all of the stupid shit that he does

Ever since he was like 4

Everyone has said yes

He wants to defy them

He wants to just do something to make someone say no

That and he lowkey

He wants ~~Phil~~ Wilbur to pay attention to him

Is a Little Shit who causes so many problems on purpose to try and find someone who will push back against him

He wants someone to give him structure and discipline but overall he just wants his family’s attention

He’s broken shit, thrown temper tantrums, he’s started fights and he’ll he’s even snuck out and stole things

He’s never been stopped

People consider him snobby and spoiled

He's a brat

He gets everything he wants, but he doesn’t really want it, he just asks to see if they’ll tell him no

Tubbo = Stable Boy

Ranboo = Prince of another country (probably the americas)

Ranboo could definitely fit the role of an overseas royal prince who Tommy sees as a regal, spoiled, uppity little shit. Like Tubbo, who Tommy sneaks everywhere, has met Ranboo and likes him. Tommy can't possibly see why, he's unbearable.

Bench Trio = Best freinds

I think that Tommy and his brothers were always very very close

they just have jobs and shit

They took over Phil's shit

they probably drift apart as they get older, Wilbur and techno have duties and Tommy starts his quest for attention, they grow apart from their little brother without realizing it

Tommy and his mother (kristin) are always and have continued to be close

she definitely chides him, and tells him quietly to not do things for all of his "misbehaviors"

but there is only so much that she can do, because she has the duty to not make a scene

that and she's not who he's looking for attention from

You may be asking "How is crime recognized, identified, discussed, and atoned for?" more specifically, "Is it a 'you stole my bread so without asking anyone I'm cutting your hand off' or is it the US court system" ~~You may also be Ethan~~

The answer is:

like the UKs

But more like

Okay so the Supreme Judicial system, but Phil (and then Wilbur) has teh final say

Court system, but with Phil overseeing everything

instead of a judge

HOWEVER, that's in the national level

in smaller villages, its more of the cut your hand off system

because the judicial system isn't regulated

So bonus questions:

Punishments and the identification of whether a crime counts as a crime?

soldiers can call crimes out, and citizens can file reports

Phil's not really shit, he just doesn't show Tommy any attention because he's busy with the other two

Just honestly doesn't even care about most shit Tommy does

Like, doesn't pay attention to it until it affects him, he's busy running a country and training the boys to running a country

I don’t think they (the brothers) realize how badly everything is affecting Tommy

The only one who knows anything about the full extent would be his mom, and she’s in a similar boat to Tommy

Phil doenst really see her much either

Not like she could “Make a Scene” trying to get Phil to pay attention to his youngest, to actually love his child, he’s barely around

Kristin and Phil spend time together at night, but during the day everything is for the cameras

its like the UK royals, how they do shit just for the people

And Phil doenst want to hear about the kids at night, he wants to spend time with his wife

Tommy has stolen a car and will do it again

Just fucking hopped in and took a joyride

With Absolutely No Repercussions

Do you think Phil ever tries to hire like, a nanny or something? In the aftermath of the Car Incident? Yes, and it never worked

Tommy, like 15 at the time, pissed as hell as a random ass woman tries to tell him to go to bed at 8:30 pm

Tommy wants somebody to tell him no but not somebody hired to tell him no mannn

Tommy goes to like parties - like ragers

he has a network of really famous friends like young actors and shit

dude is a party animal, underage drinking, rumors of drugs, he’s the PR Teams worst nightmare, but they’re not going to say anything

The press makes up SO MUCH SHIT

The press once said that he had done cocaine when it was really one of his friends

Tommy adopts two dogs (hello Betty and Walter) without asking either of his parents

Betty is short for Elizabeth

He brings them in off the street

Literal abandoned street dogs and he goes, mine now

He like, walks down the street with sunglasses on, and just doesn't look at anyone as he walks the dogs, who have like black nice leather leashes

The paparazzi always finds him walking the dogs

like a modern celebrity

Mans can and will call the paparazzi on himself - because he is a drama queen ETHAN Tommy voice "hello pa pa. I have hired two new staff, pa pa." "Huh?" "they have found work in this palace as emotional support animals, pa pa." "....ok." tommy voice "he didn't even blink, elizabeth the fourteenth" END OF ETHAN MAKING FUN OF THE BRITISH

By the way just to clear things up with you all, Tommy addresses Phil as "Father"

most of the paparazzi's pictures of Tommy are him flipping the camera off

He poses for them

just sees a camera and fucking sticks his tongue out and flips them off

He’s wearing some atrocious outfit while walking his dogs and he just has a full on fashion photshoot of poses for them

If his dad won’t give him attention at least they will

Tommy befriends some of the staff

he hates a lot of the butlers tbh

thinks they're stuck up

but likes to gossip with the maids, and sit in the kitchen as the chefs cook lunch "Heyyyy, chef!" "Your highness, what is it, are you hungry?" "Can't a man just talk to his chef? Befriend his castle staff?" "Ah."

that and the kitchen gives betty and walter treats

Top ten Prince Thomas microaggressions

Number One: he calls Phil "your highness"

For context, kings are referred to as Your Majesty

He calls Wilbur Your Majesty

It was a joke when they were younger, a habit from then on, but now it’s to spite Phil

Tommy spends an ridiculous amount of money on clothes all at once, purely to see if Phil would yell at him for using the family debit card for it

He never wears the clothes

He doesn’t particularly like any of them anyways

Instead he donate them all anonymously

Tommy may be a brat but he isn’t wasteful

By the time Tommy’s 12 he’s started acting up, and it escalates slowly until he hits 15 where things just start snowballing and he gets worse and worse

he's definitely nicknamed by the press as some sort of party animal or fratboy

a spoiled brat

He’s 16, and he knows his place in the family, he is forgotten and glossed over, but he won’t be ignored, not if he can help it

The Public gives him the attention he wishes his father would give him, he walks his dogs with the paparazzi tailing after him, just hoping that maybe one scandal or one horrible picture will eventually be enough to make his dad actually See him

he'll tell the paparazzi what they want to hear

and give every magazine a story to tell

they notice him

he just wants somebody to tell him no, somebody tell this boy no without being paid to please

Tommy probably has like, pierced his ears or smth. Gotten tattoos.

he has holes in his face yes.

he pierced his ears and his nose

He has a tattoo on the inside of his finger that matches with Tubbo and Ranboo

Maybe the picture of him plastered from last weekend will make his dad reprimand him

Maybe the weed found in his backseat will get his Dad to ground him

Maybe the bottle of fucking pills he was “holding for a friend” but got caught with Will get some sort of reaction

and its not like he's only doing it for attention

he starts it for attention, but he loves it he does

he has fun, he loves his friends, he likes the parties and the air

but, he also loves the attention, he's not gonna lie

Tommy who took adderall at a party once but it didn’t do anything for him, he seemed to function a little better actually

Tommy who knows Techno has adhd and takes adderall for it, Tommy who puts two and two together Bc he’s not fucking dumb

Tommy realizing his dad never cared to even get him diagnosed or treated

and Techno does notice, he does figure it out, but he does either a "hey..." or a "m8 I'll just get you your own if its helpin you focus" and tommy is furious

Tommy's life here is just

'trying to be yelled at HARD MODE'

Just wants to be screamed at, lowkey

I think, Wilbur avoids the tabloids

And the press

And the news

However, his advisors often read him the shit about Tommy - or anything about him

But they never see the pictures

They don’t see the picture of Tommy drunk on a strangers balcony

They don't see how bad it is

Tommy however? LOVES reading what the press has to say about him

Phil sees it however,

And he’s so disappointed

He gives Tommy so many talks but it never works

Because it doesn’t get him to love Tommy, to care about what Tommy does

Not like their mother

And he never makes a scene, not in the way Tommy wants to

It's all about "YOUR RUINING OUR IMAGE"

not: "YOUR RUINING YOUR LIFE"

He never asks if Tommy is ok

He never asks if he’s safe

Tommy's mum however, SO MANY AWKWARD "STAY SAFE" TALKS

He doesn't just fucking jump off shit because of her, he's slightly less reckless so that he can come home alive to her

I just think that Wilbur, no matter how busy, would find time to concerned yell at his baby brother if he were to find out about the pills

Weed and alcohol? Not great but ok.

Pills though?? He is full blown concerned Wilbro there

His brothers care. Their father is busy. He's a jerk sometimes too.

Wilbur does put out the fire a bit

He’s glad Wilbur had his best interest in mind

But man

The news headlines

They do him dirty

Shit like “Prince Tommy Caught Doing Cocaine at Frat Party” really fuck him over

They really just try their best to make him look like shit 95% of the time

Tommy loves it, just a little

Bad press is still press

He laughs at the headline Bc he knows he wasn’t doing cocaine, but Phil doesn’t, wilbur and techno don’t know that

It’s a tense week after that headline is released

His mom doesn’t even know if Tommy would have actually done cocaine

They just don’t know

Kristin asks him

She’s the only one who believes him

I think Wilbur wants to believe him, Techno too

But it’s hard to, especially when you’re not even sure you know your own brother anymore

Wilbur says something along the lines of being disappointed in Tommy, if he thought Tommy was trying to be better

Tommy scoffs and says he is trying, but that it’s real rich of Wilbur to be or entering to care now

This isn’t even the worse headline

One time a blonde kid got picked up from the same party Tommy was at on a stretcher, he had had an allergic reaction

Some shitty journalist saw and automatically assumed it was Tommy

They ran with the story that the prince had fucking overdosed for at least a week

The things they say are close to the truth but not quite

The PR Team tries their best to help but

They don’t even know what’s true or not

Tommy goes on a bender for a week, and walks into their office with coffee and pastries to apologize

They all know that presents mean a rough week of damage control

But Tommy imports them these Bomb ass donuts so

Fair trade really

Also heaven forbid tommy gets seen with a girl

It’s the worst shit

Tommy gets caught, drunk off his ass, pushing a couch out a window

(To be fair the people were moving soon anyways, they didn’t need the couch, it was a going away party)

And the next morning, recalling what he did

He orders up those pastries and calls the coffee place

Swings by to pick up the coffee and picks up the pastries all within the next two hours and delivers them on the third with an apology note

It’s fucking DAMAGE control

Thinking about Tubbo and Ranboo being Tommy’s DDs when they can

They are

When Tommy’s handler isn’t around

Them doing wild shit together but not Wild Shit

Tommy teaches them how to do burnouts and donuts in a fucking lambos in an empty mall parking lot

Ranboo goes everywhere incognito, Tommy practically flaunts his rank, Tubbo is considered a nobody and doesn't have to do anything but show up in casual clothes. He has a uniform for stablework.

Ranboo's parents are approving of his friendship with the fledging prince, as they hope he can wrangle Tommy to regality and he's building positive relations between the two kingdoms.

Phil is disapproving, worried Tommy will taint Ranboo and his rep and cause a tense air between the two kingdoms. Tommy loves Phil's worry, he practically bathes in it, it's the attention he so craves.

Tommy definitely will hold Tubbo's hand when he walks with him, because the headlines all scream Tommy is the gay?? and while he's very incredibly straight, he finds this hysterical.

Ranboo isn't always in Tommy's kingdom and rather spends most of his time at home. He might be second to heir or the crown prince himself, but he does have to spend time in his own country. Tommy face calls him a lot and he and Tubbo are ecstatic when he announces he's going to visit

I imagine he's second to the throne because that means he can focus on building relations instead of training to be king.

Older sibling Fundy, gets chronic illness, and Ranboo has to take over the throne for a bit

One of Tommy's worst stunts was hitching a ride to the Americas/Ranboo's kingdom without telling anyone.

Whether by boat or plane, he was gonna go visit his young king friend no matter what.

I say "young king" but he's still a prince. Just filling in for fundy

But all eyes turn to Ranboo and Ranboo is stumbling with attention he'd never known. Tommy has to help, doesn't he?

He expects such a punishment for stowing away to visit, but the headlines are... positive. Prince Tommy's friendship with Princr Ranboo becomes.... legendary, practically. Tubbo is always excluded from the news, even when he comes with.

Never too fantastical for classism

But no, the headlines see Tommy's visit not as the young, rebellious prince stowing away, but as a young boy risking his skin to visit his stressed friend.

Tommy is appalled.

And Tommy just groans and shows him the phone

And Ranboo laughs and goes

“There there Tommy, I’m sure dragging me to a frat party will be enough to ruin the good press.”

“Maybe get a dui, you’ll have diplomatic immunity so no jail time?”

“Boo, I wouldn’t get jail time even if I wasn’t em-mune, I am simply too poggers.”

“Sure man, let’s go with that.”

Tommy’s like “maybe I need to actually start doing hard drugs”

Ranboos just like “no -“ just “Please god no, your brothers will kill both of us.”

The Boo is terrified of Techno and Wilbur

Not as royals though, simply as Tommy’s older brothers

Like he knows about Tommy’s issues with validation and feeling unloved, he knows his Brothers are often very busy

But he also sees the way they look at Tommy, and the way they look when people talk bad about Tommy

He knows if something were to happen and he was to cause harm to Tommy or cause Tommy to cause harm to himself

It probably wouldn’t end well for him

Wilbur and techno try as hard as they can

But they’re SO busy

That they can’t do much especially when Tommy’s so persistent on doing his shit

Tubbo is great with the horses he tends to, and Tommy adores them. Ranboo is an excellent, regal rider and Tommy and Tubbo are more rough and ballsy, so races are fair and fastpaced.

Ranboo once got bucked by a royal stallion and Tommy and Tubbo never let him live it down.

I imagine Tubbo lives on the property, as some servants do. He either doesn't have a family, has a bad one, or his family doesn't live close to the palace.

So Tommy 10/10 sneaks to the servants' quarters and he and Tubbo sneak out to ride the horses.

I feel like Wilbur makes more of an effort after the pills and cocaine incident, he tries to ask Tommy about the headlines

Purples is Tommy’s friend

Rich family, old money

Throws a lot of the parties Tommy goes to

Purpled and punz :handshake: Tommy

Frat Boys

I think you guys are underestimating the time that Tommy spends at the castle

Like he still has school, and usually 3 days out of the week he follows around his brothers like an endearing little shit

But those 4 days where he’s gone (which includes weekends) plus nights, he’s doing shit

Also, yiu know Pongo right

101 Dalmatians

That’s how Tommy walks Betty and Walter

They are like standing completely proper and walks straight

ah yes, the royal bitches and also betty and walter are there too

the paparazzi taking pictures of Tommy and the dogs

and Tommy turns, taking his sunglasses off, and smiles big and wide "They have names you know? You should stop callin' them 'the royal dogs'."

One of the guys, he's familiar with the prince turns on his camera and asks "what're their names Prince Tommy?"

"Betty and Walter. Give them some respect."

Tommy visits Ranboo sometimes. Ranboo was looking for him one day and just found him standing in a long hall, staring at a portrait.

It's Ranboo, just barely younger, hands folded behind his back, the perfect picture of regality.

Tommy is staring at it because he knows that at home, there is a portrait of Wilbur looking like that, and one of Techno, and one of Phil and Kristen, and one of himself.

But somehow this image of Ranboo is.. haunting

Not because it doesn't match with the Ranboo he knows, but because it does.

It haunts him because he can stare at his portrait for hours and never see himself, but this is so plainly Ranboo that it's chilling.

Ranboo stands beside him, hands folded behind his back as they always are when he is in nice clothes and his eyes are visible. Tommy glances over and Ranboo is facing him, but staring up at the picture. It's still him.

The clothes are different and his hair is longer now, but Tommy can't tell the difference past that.

He knows that Ranboo is what his family wants him to be

He knows that Ranboo is him if he hadn't strayed, the same past

Ranboo knows exactly what’s going through his head right now

And he knows exactly what he needs too

They get fucking piss ass drunk in Ranboo’s room order takeout and FaceTime Tubbo

They can party tomorrow, Tommy doesn’t need to be in public right now

ANywyas

Tommy and his mother have a wonderful relationship

she teaches him literacy and history, they have a tutor teach him maths

they eat breakfast together every morning

the whole family does

but his mum tries to eat lunch with him at least 3 times a week

he goes out for lunch the days he doesn't eat with his brothers or mom, out to some resturant, sometimes, they trash it or party, sometimes he just brings Tubbo, no big group, and they just chill

With Ranboo in line for kingship (the way royalty works is that if the ruler dies, it will always go to the next in line of blood, never by marriage. Even if every heir was dead, it would still not go to the ruler consort but instead to a family member of the late ruler), rep is so much more important

he can't really be seen with Tommy sometimes

not on the bad weeks

not when Tommy just destroyed a bnb or set off fireworks with his friends, or was caught throwing chairs into his friend's pool

Tommy likes sport cars

big car guys

He has an exorbitant amount of fancy cars

its truly like

disgusting

how many cars he owns

Wilbur makes fun of it Bc the kid is just now legally old to drive

But Wilbur has so many expensive instruments

Some of which he doesn’t even know how to play yet

to be fair

Wilbur doesnt go breaking his instraments

Techno, techno has swords, which makes sense Bc he’s a general

But the amount swords he has just hanging on his wall

Never meant to be used

It’s so many

I feel like Tommy has a few cars that he doesn’t even let get scratched tho much

His babies

he has his expensive cars that he wrecks

and then his expensive cars that he treats like gold

They’re named

Clementine is this horrendous orange car that he absolutely loves

Its a bright orange ferrari

(He loves it Bc it was a gift from Phil, one of the first cars in his collection)

(Tommy doesn’t know that the idea was his mother’s, his father didn’t know what to get him)

all of his cars have padding in the back for his dogs

Tommy hates purse dogs, the girls with them are always fake and horrible

but he wishes his dogs were that small

Easy to transport

but they got all gangly limbs like him

and stand up to his hip

Henry is his sleek black classic mustang convertable

its what he drives when he doesn't want to be followed by the papp

It’s what he drives when he takes The BT to lunch

its not that the paparazzi doesn't know its him

they know

but he's not in one of his bright fucking obscene cars

The press and Tommy have a weird sort of understanding

He creates their headlines and they let him have moments to himself

If someone breaches that

They risk getting blacklisted

that car was what he drove to his grandmother's funeral in

im not naming his grandmother, but all royals live like forever

Clementine barely sees the road I think

She’s kept in top condition

By Tommy’s own hands

But she probably doesn’t get driven to the parties

Or the brunches

Or the clubs

She's used pretty much exclusively for black tie events

Tubbo is his driver for those Bc he trusts no one else with the car

And he has to exit her before she’s parked

So Tubbo valets and then meets him inside

It’s also how Tubbo gets into the black tie events

so its modern right

so its like thousand-dollar suits instead of capes

so, Tommy just refuses to wear blazers and suit jackets

he always wears his button-ups rolled to his elbows

Maybe, maybe you’ll get him in a vest

But most of the time it’s a button up, rolled up sleeves, and the tie is most likely incorrect or untied

The only reason it’s correct half the time, is because Wilbur makes him let him tie it

Tommy won't wear the jacket because he prefers to roll his sleeves up - he's able to do anything, party or just like rough housing with his brothers, or helping out the staff

Wilbur won't wear a tie, or a button up most days, opting for a high-end sweater and loads of jewelry; its just much more his style.

Techno won't wear a vest because it restricts the places he can hid weapons, and he almost never keeps his tie tied.

Tommy trying to walk past Wilbur to leave with and untied tie

“Wait! You know you can’t leave like that, come here.”

Tommy’s groans and slumps over but walks over to Wil anyways

“I’m just gonna untie it halfway through the party, you know i will.”

“Well, I’m not letting my little brother walk a red carpet with an untied tie, you know I won’t”

The second half said in a mocking tone of voice, very clearly mimicking Tommy’s whining

It’s a soft moment, they stand there together, brothers

And as Wilbur’s pat the finished tie, they make eye contact and both of them have undeniably fond looks on their faces, damn they’re brothers n shit

“Thanks Wil.”

It’s quiet, it’s soft, it’s Tommy

“Of course.”

Just as soft, just as quiet, wholly Wilbur

Wilbur clears his throat breaking the soft atmosphere of the room

“Now go, you gremlin. Don’t be late”

Wilbur ruffles Tommy’s hair, careful not to mess it up too much

Tommy rolls his eyes And quickly heads for the door “Bye Wil! Love you! Don’t wait up!” Wilbur quickly yells after him

“Love you too! Don’t do anything stupid!”

“Oh Wil you know I can’t promise that!” Wilbur just rolls his eyes and returns to his book

Yeah Tommy stays away from tobacco I think

Just weed

and I wouldn't be surprised if like hits peoples vapes sometimes, but doesn't smoke cigs

for sure, its stressful

Wilbur smokes cigarettes though

and he can't act out like Tommy can

and Phil loves him..

Techno and Wilbur watching Tommy rebel in the ways they never got to

They feel kinda sad, that they never got to be kids like that, sad that Tommy feels like he has to act out for attention

he gets to do shit

like he gets to be a real teen

the whole, dumb rich 17 year old experience

like yachts, and expensive hotel rooms, and sport cars

And sure they probably wouldn’t have been going to frat parties or crashing brunch places, but they see him with BT

See him have actual friends

And they’re happy for him

But it hurts a bit

And Tommy's hurting too

It's a lot

but its like

even if Phil wasn't shit

its a lot of attention

like everyone is watching them at all times

Techno and Wilbur have to stay refined in the eyes of the press

Tommy gets to put on a show for them

Yeah yeah

Do you know how much a drunk picture of Prince Tommy is worth?

Too much

Some random guy on his first paparazzi job, gets a pic of Tommy, shirt mostly unbuttoned, tie tied around his head, drinking out of a beer bottle, and flipping off the camera while stumbling out of the most expensive hotel in the UK

The guy never has to work again

Purpled son of some billionaire, and Ranboo a literal prince is with him

They are both laughing at him

Tommy swung on a chandelier that night

A picture of that ends up online, some socialites Twitter

The amount of people in her dms for that picture?

Ludicrous

Like just the random pictures from Snapchat stories

Magazines pay thousands

Yeah the amount of double takes people have done going through their friends Snapchat stories like

Just tapping through

“WAIT WAS THAT PRINCE THOMAS????”

So, Dessert Drinks

It’s alcoholic beverages that have like chocolate or gram crackers or maybe candy in them

That are meant to taste like a dessert

So there’s chocolate cake margaritas, or like s’mores drinks

They’re Tommy’s favorite things in the world

Everyone thinks that he’d like the like strong, burning, whiskey esk stuff

But no

He wants the sweetest thing you got

Like he’ll drink straught vodka, but not if he doesn’t have too y’know?

He also like wine strangely enough

The like really expensive wine

Bc it reminds him of Wil

They have it down in the cellar

Techno is the whiskey dude

Or like 1942

Which is just a really bougie tequila

He just likes the shit that burns

Tubbo will drink literally anything

He’ll eat anything too

It definitely comes from the spot that he didn’t have that many choices like Tommy, but he genuinely just likes anything

Which is why Tommy really likes to treat him out to fancy fucking restaurants

One of Tommy’s favorite past times is spoiling his loved one

Fucking loves giving presents n shit

It's his love language

Ranboo doesn’t pay for anything when he’s visiting

Tommy insists on paying

Tommy has millions from the throne, he will use it

Plus he uses his daddy’s card so like, Phil can afford to spend the money

Oh he has one of those black cards doesn’t he

And by he I mean Phil

But you know, Daddy’s card

Black amex all the way

Boujie motherfuckers

Tommy's drunk like persona is different depending on the environment

When its Wilbur and Techno having to deal with Drunk Tommy

He’s like an excitable puppy, he would switch from rowdy to sappy real quick for his brothers

So they’re trying to get a drunk Tommy to bed but Tommy’s 100% clinging to them

Just full of affection

Techno tries to leave to go study and drunk Tommy just looks so fucking sad

Kicked puppy

He’s very much turning on the little brother charm, full scale pouting, whining, nicknames and all

making grabby hands, sitting on thr ground, fluffed up hair, shirt all wrinkled

"Fucking - fine. What are you gonna do without me, hm?"

He’s a god damned puppy and it’s hard to believe this is the same kid who got in a bar fight last week

he hangs off the chandeliers of boogie hotels

he also trashes his friend's rentals

on the other hand, he hugs his brothers

and steals Wilbur's crown

when he wears Will's crown it goes over his eyes

Still does after all these years

He’s grown but Wils head is simply too big

Tommy has his own crown of course

he just doesn't wear it as often as Wilbru does

Wilbur wears his all of the time

Tommy wears his when

A. he's drunk and with friends

B. at formal or royal events

he likes wearing it when he's partying

still thinking about drunk Tommy and his brothers having to deal with him

He makes techno give him a piggy back ride

He can walk fine, he just wants a piggy back ride man

Can you blame him?

They all really miss being little

They miss being able to be kids n shit

when their mother took care of them

and their father did all the king shit

And when Techno would give Tommy piggyback rides in the garden

When Wilbur had all the time in the world to learn how to play guitar

Even if it comes from Tommy getting drunk off his ass they’re glad they can still find the childish joy that they once had y’know?

Techno gives Tommy a piggy back ride to his room, and Tommy steals Wilbur’s crown and they talk and it’s nice

And as everything winds down Wilbur plays his guitar

And it’s so similar to when they were younger man

...

but then,,, Wilbur gets called down for an emergency meeting

and Techno has to make sure the guards are doing their rounds

and Tommy's left all alone in The Prince's Chambers

and people wonder why Tommy likes partying

fills the time, doesn't it?

He wakes up cold and alone and hungover

And he calls Tubbo and they just fucking day drink man

It’s a bad two days

Yeha but basically after this night he and Tubbo get fucking drunk as hell and they don’t come back to the castle for two days

And Tommy is barely sober during those two days

After those type of days happen Tommy always goes completely straightedge for a week

He doenst need to develop an addiction y’know?

Plus the chaos doesn’t have to happen drunk

He’s pretty irrational sober anywyas

half of the parties he's at he's not even drunk

sometimes he'll get high

but he just likes the adrenaline

and just hanging and being fucking assholes with his mates

POV you are an emotionally wrecked prince who is hanging onto this present as proof that your dad knows who you are at least in the slightest and you find out it’s not actually a gift from him but something your mother told him to get you

He didn’t even think twice just called the dealership and asked for the car, didn’t even know which one it was

mmmmm Tommy wrecks Clem that night

It’s not a good night for anyone

Got drunk as hell man

No dd

Car crash

I don’t think Clem is totaled

And Tommy is ok

But she’s scratched and dented and it’s just a representation of how Tommy feels

Something about Clementine being symbolic of hope and the idea that his father knew him

And with that crashing down

Clementine was bound to crash too

Tommy gets out with some bruises and Clementine can be fixed

But it happens on a public street so it’s everywhere

Tommy wrecks Clem

Then fucking goes on a bender

just destroys shit

parties so he doesn't think about it

and then he fucking crashes

Wilbur and Techno and Kristin all know what the car meant to him, what it symbolized to him

So when there’s a headline and a picture of Tommy staring at a wrecked Clem, they don’t know how to feel

maybe he mentioned something about upgrading Clem to Phil, or offhandedly at family dinner

And Phil asks something like “Right and when did you get this one?” Very rudely y’know

And Tommy’s like, it’s the one you got me for my birthday last year, and Phil just says something about how he has to be more specific because he doesn’t even know which one that is

And Tommy feels everything crumble around him and he just tensely says, “never mind...” and goes back to his food

The other three watch the whole exchange like, “fuuuuuuuuuck”

And then as soon as dinners over Tommy’s out the door man

He’s gone

he doesn't take the dogs, which means he's causing damage

He doenst even take Tubbo

they can hear the handler hand Tommy the keys

Tubbo comes to Wil to ask if he knew where Tommy was and that’s when they realize Tommy’s going out to cause real damage

And Tommy’s phone is turned off

They can’t contact him

Tommy gets handcuffed

he won't get arrested, but he'll get brought back in a police car

he fucking like crashed into a poll on purpose

like it was less on purpose and more like he definitely wasn’t not trying to hit something

And then they fucking breathalyzer him and he’s drunk as balls

Straight vodka type night

there's a bottle in the cupholder

He gets out when he wrecks and you just see him dead eyed staring at the scratches on her hood

The dent in her door

The cracks in the windshield

And he just takes a swig of the bottle

He lets the police take the bottle and handcuff him, taking him back to the palace

Clem is towed back too

He doenst care man

this is bigger than party to distract Bc it’s all he’s thinking about even drunk n shit

So I feel like he’s absolutely crushed

he spends like a week or two in a depressive episode won't leave his room, won't talk to his dad

and then he asks his mom "why didn't you tell me?"

and she just purses her lips and and shakes her head

and he's out

he needs to leave

he doesn't need her pity

and he just goes to Purp's and parties

because he just wants to have fun for one night before he learns that everything is a lie

His brothers are there as much as he lets them be

Tubbo too

Ranboo would try to make it over after seeing the headlines

he gets on a jet

and goes as soon as he sees the news

cause Clem was Tommy's baby

He loved that fucking car man

And then

Boom

One dinner is all it took to ruin everything

Phil's just left like "what'd I do?"

Techno is straight faced

Wilbur rolls his eyes at Phil

And Kristin just looks stressed

She’s still staring the the door Tommy all but ran out of

none of them finish dinner, Kristin waves the butlers over to clear the plates

They don’t, and Phil is just so confused and frustrated and he doesn’t know what happened

Top 10 Prince Tommy Headlines: 10. Mourning or Disrespectful: Prince Thomas caught smoking outside grandmother's funeral 9. New Connections? Prince Thomas and Prince Ranboo seen outside Palace walking Royal Dogs 8. Protective Older Brother; Crown Prince William shielding Prince Thomas from cameras while walking down London streets 7. When Will He Stop? Prince Thomas continues his week-long bender 6. Another Frat Party: Prince Thomas found stumbling drunk after rowdy night at The Ritz London 5. Boy Crazy? Prince Thomas and Mystery Boy seen dancing at Crown Prince William's Birthday Ball 4. Is Prince Thomas's Rampage Over? The Prince seen hungover, nursing a coffee at London Branch Costa Coffee 3. Time to stop; Prince Thomas caught doing cocaine at socialites party 2. A good friend - Prince Thomas flew to the United States to help Prince Ranboo with new responsibilities

1. When is enough, enough? Prince Thomas crashes after driving drunk, arrested.

10 Tommy doesn’t smoke cigs so mans was just getting high at his grandmas funeral

he was real close with his granny, it was a sad day

It was because his father said something like “oh, I didn’t know you were coming Tommy”

It was his fucking grandmother Phil

Tommy just puts his sun glasses on, and sits as far away as he can

Number 5, the boy is Tubbo, Tubbo thinks it’s fucking hilarious, Tommy is pissed

Some of those headlines seem like they’re from the car month

Obviously number one is

But then the bender headline

Then the coffee one

And then the Wilbur one

They seem like a series of events

big month for the press

Tommys hungover and he calls Wil asking for him to pick him up

And Wilbur drops everything Bc he’s just glad Tommy’s coming back home

wilbur fucking glares at the cameras

Tommy's used to it

And then the press tries to mob them and Wilbur Almost breaks decorum

Like almost fucking yells at someone who gets too close

and Wilbur never does that

he's so in-line

he never breaks the rules

but goddamn if they take one step closer -

He’s been especially stressed, and all he wants is to get his baby brother home man

He’s been smoking a lot more since the wreck

He just wishes he could make everything better

Tommy relishes in talking to the press

Wilbur will clart someone who gets to close to his baby brother

The press who’s never seen Wilbur as anything other than composed and charming suddenly being faced with a very angry older brother who smells slightly like cigarette smoke

Wilbur in the Pogtopia coat but it’s some designer piece that’s expensive as hell

It’s his smoking coat

And it’s what he picks Tommy up in

So he smells like smoke

And not the tasteful cologne he usually wears in public

just like a dark overcoat

really expensive wool

Wilbur using it to cover them from the cameras

when they were younger, like 16 and 12, Wilbur would hide Tommy

like no one got a picture of Tommy until he was 14 or 15

Kristin really hid the boys when they were kids too

Tommy trying to peak out and make faces at the camera

it was illegal to get pictures of them younger than 10

like immediate blacklist

And also maybe some legal issues

Wilbur pulls Tommy's hood up over Tommy's head

And it’s very older brother of him too, he pulls it over to protect his face but then cinches the strings to be a little shit

Those Wilbur and Tommy brother moments comps exists in the universe too

But it’s just shit like that

Tommy has a great support system

He really does

His brothers love him

His mom loves him

He has two amazing friends and a bunch of other great friends as well

And sometimes he feels like a brat for throwing all these fits over his dad y’know?

Wilbur always tries to like, keep an arm around him when they're doing red carpets

And keeps Tommy sitting next to him at Royal events

but also like, steals food off his plate

and ruffles his hair

Tommy whispers the fucking worst jokes about the dignitaries and nobles and Wilbur has to keep a straight face

god thats tommys favorite thing to do

he tries so hard to get Wilbur to laugh and lose his shit

The fucking big boobs bit

But it’s Tommy whispering it to Wilbur completely out of context and randomly at a gala

ALSO

THE WHOLE EXTENDED FAMILY BULLSHIT

TOMMY HATES IT

LIKE WHO THE FUCK IS THIS LIKE AUNT TO HIM?

HE DOESNT KNOW HER

But Royal Families are always big on that shiit

They try to hug him n shit

And Tommy depending on how Brave n shit he’s feeling (how fed up he is) will either politely excuse himself or straight up say no and step back with a glare

he's honestly uncomfortable around the strangers

who say they're family

like he's too sober for this

He needs a god damned drink

But he’s in a vest and a nice tie and his crown is sat proper on his head

And he can’t have a drink

god he's like a little doll, he plays by Phil's rules

the crown comes on and he's the proper prince

He fucking hates it

he sips on Wilbur's wine, and does the whole "tequila for water" thing sometimes

Flask in his sleeve

Techno catches him with the flask once and is just impressed

god is that a look on Techno's face

He sees Tommy slip it from his sleeve and somehow sleight off hand take a drink

And it’s just a raised eyebrow and a head nod that says

Good for you

Bc techno also needs a drink during these events

Sometimes Tommy will spike his and Techno's drinks

as Wilbur regally sips on wine

Wilbur fucking also secretly wishing he had a flask during the drier events

Wine drink just isn’t enough sometimes

Wilbur puts on his best face

and pretends he wants to be there

and gives out a warm smile, and raises a glass

god he fucking hates it sometimes

and sometimes he loves it

but man, does he hate it sometimes

Tommy complains and Phil makes a passive aggressive comment about how

“Oh but don’t you love parties Tommy.”

Wilbur sits between them

The table goes

Techno Kristin Phil Wilbur Tommy

Tommy just sneaks another sip of the flask

he doesn't have time to deal with his dads shit

Slumps back in the seat

He probably wouldn’t even try to hide it after that

Not like Phil is actually looking at him

He can let the press have it

He doenst care

just like leaves the flask next to him

under teh table

and jsut takes large swigs from it

Tommy maybe having a group of his friends crash one of the stuffy events

Not an important one

So fucking dedication ceremony to some inane building

He just invites a wild group of socialites

It’s nice

It’s not as wild as a normal Tommy Innit party

But it’s not a stuffy fucking boring ass royal meeting

they just bring some fucking whiskey into the back room and chat shit

Tommy fucking has a group of friends crash this gathering

It’s not wild

But it’s not stuffy

It’s nice

Tommy even drags Wilbur back for at least a little

and that takes a whole lot of work

It really does, Wilbur isn’t even a little tipsy off the wine, and Phil been by him the whole time and it’s just been hell, he can’t get wiobur away from the “socializing” hes doing

but when Wilbur is a bit tipsy he just becomes more charasmatic

truly a king

Less someone putting on a mask for their father

A little bit more authentic

he's a natural, sipping wine with one hand, and shaking hands with the other, crown propped beautifully on his head, million dollar suits hanging off his frame

It’s nice to see his brother in his element

its a bit sad

but its nice

A little yeah, Wilbur’s

Wilbur’s leaving him, not really but

Wilbur being king is-

It’s going to be hard

Different

More than it is already

Wilbur will always love him

But eventually he’ll be too busy for Tommy

Just like Phil is

And it hurts

But that thought is what makes Tommy take a drink of his flask and drag Wilbur to the back room

Wilbur doesn’t have to forget him yet

Tommy looks real regal too

Wilbur wishes that Tommy could see what he sees

But he knows that Tommy’s self worth issues would take more than a nice hug and some warm words to fix

Tommy looks regal, and the gold crown really fits with the whole golden boy aesthetic

and he laughs, and makes conversation with everyome

and everyone eases up around him

Wilbur wishes that Tommy saw what he sees

also

Tommy and Ranboo's texts have been leaked once

Wow so many dog pictures dude

but also

:sparkles:state secrets:sparkles:

That was hell to clean up

it fucking was

it used petnames (which the public is never supposed to know about the nickanmes of royals fun fact)

and said shit about Phil

and detailed Fundy's illness which isn't public

and talked about meetings that Wilbur forced Tommy to attend

Tommy was terrified

Ranboo too

He was so scared someone would be angry at him for it

He doesn’t think he could handle be yelled at for this thing that wasn’t even his fault

like of course he could've not said it over text

but one of his best friends lives an ocean away

and his life is just all about secrets

dont make this something too

:sparkles: hackers :sparkles:

if someone god a hold of Tommy's IP, or Phone, or Phone number

or

dms

they could be using instagram, twitter, or snapchat to have some of these converstaions

dms can get leaked real easily

Mmmm you ever think about Crime Bous

Because all I can think about is when Wilbur does get out of the house, and just like every event they go to

Tommy isn’t a fucking party boy then, he’s just Prince Thomas, Crown Prince William’s baby brother

And they always get photographed and shit

But they have a great time

They’re always smiling when they’re together

Sans Wilbur being a really protective older brother, and when their grandmother died

It’s nice to just go get lunch together at that one specific cafe they’ve been going to for years

Or just walk the dogs together

Just hang out and be brothers

They sit at the same table every time, and Tommy has gotten a Raspberry Lemonade since he was 8

When they walk the dogs, Wilbur holds Walter and Tommy holds Betty

Sunglasses on, big wool overcoats, and pants that were sewn just for them

And they’re seen walking out on the streets during big events a lot too

To like take a breather

Tommy has made a habit of allowing the press to ask him questions whenever they find him

Wilbur on the other hand always knows exactly what to say to press that come up to them

He always shoos them off with a polite “we won’t be answering any question right now thank you” and a blinding smile

And Tommy’s making a face at the press from over his shoulder

Either like sticking his tongue out or making some sort of face at Wilbur

As he gets older, he stops doing it as much because it gets a bit tiring, everything is tiring

But he does it every once in a while, usually a sharp grin over Wilbur’s shoulder accompanied by a middle finger

when like press sees that Wilbur smokes like a lot

hm

big thin

and I feel like Wilbur would straight up be like "its not a big deal, its completely legal"

and hes like smoking 8 cigs a day, but its fine

He doesn’t have an issue

It’s just a little stress relief

King at 21 is a lot to handle

and maybe the stress is so much that it becomes a problem

but hey its his relief

its legal

he's fine

That’s Wilbur’s mantra most of the time

he falls asleep in Tommys bed a lot, waiting for the teen to come home

wilbur does

he finishes a pack, and sighs, rubbing his eyes

The empire is on the brink of war, it always is

He looks in Tommy's room, its empty

And he sits on the bed, waiting

10 minutes later he's asleep

The sheets don’t smell like Wilbur, and Wil thinks that’s what makes it’s so comforting

They don’t stink of nicotine or Wilbur cologne

The smell like Tommy

and while that smell like expensive booze, and coconut shampoo

its perfect

and the dogs are in Tommy's room too

he's a little less alone

Betty is the cuddler

She’ll come up and sleep next to Wil

but she wont do it to just anyone

its a bond, its trust

its the fact that Tommy likes Wilbur

she growls at Phil

she nudges at Kristin, LOVES kristin

anyways

its lonely and sad

because Tommy usually doesnt come back

Tommy snakes back in early in the morning and tucks Wilbur in

Though most times Wilbur falls asleep in Tommys bed

Uncovered

Completely dressed

He’s lucky bettys fur is sleek otherwise his very expensive clothes would be covered

I think Wilbur more often then not will wake up with Tommy in his arms, and that makes him very happy

like, Tommy comes it at 5am, and just snuggles next to Wilbur

It’s makes Tommy sad to know his brother is waiting up for him to never come

But at the same time he’s always so happy to see him when he gets home

I imagine sometimes butlers come to get Wilbur for work, and Tommy makes them leave so that Wilbur can sleep in "Hello your highness, we came to fetch King Wilbur for his morning briefing" "He's sleeping." "Well, I can see that Your Highness -" "So let him sleep." "Prince Thomas -" "Let. Him. Sleep. Okay?" "Yes, Your Highness."

I've decided that Tommy is the big spoon

in these vulranable moments, when Wilbur is weak, Tommy kind of holds him

like obviously there are a lot of tims, where Wilbur wants to hold his baby brother

however, Tommy kind of holds Wilbur, like wraps himself around Wilbur, and puts Wilbur's head in the crook of his neck

this happens when Tommy comes home to find Wilbur in his bed

either this, or Tommy curls into a ball and rests his head against wilburs chest

Tommy has daddy issues

Wilbur has the weiht of the world

Techno has ptsd

Phil: fuck you my kids are completely fine!

Wilbur’s nicotine addiction

Tommys abandonment issues

Technos fucking PTSD

Once, when the empires war was getting really, really bad, and Wilbur had to decide life or death shit

He smoked a whole pack in a day

And then just kept going

His hands wouldn’t stop shaking

why wouldn't they stop fucking shaking

Tommy stopped partying that week, he isn’t ignorant, nor a fucking dick

He was Wilbur’s right hand for as long as he needed him

Despite how badly he wanted to party until he could see straight

His brother needed him

His king needed him

And he will gladly serve Wilbur as long as he would have him

He stood right behind Wilbur

Every decision

He was right behind him

Even if it meant constant decorum and constant royal dress, Tommy was there

And that was a grounding fact

If Tommy hadn’t been there Wilbur thinks he may have lost it that week

Sometimes the only thing that kept Wilbur’s hands from shaking terribly was holding Tommy’s hands

When the advisors and court had left

Tommy would take Wilbur hands and make him do breathing exercises

Wilbur wasn’t allowed to look anywhere other than Tommy’s eyes

They would get through this

Together

They would, Tommy would make sure of it

Tommy in the room also made everyone a bit nervous and loosen up around Wilbur though

Because sometimes they act like they can boss Will around

And Tommy is stone faced, and has the media wrapped around his finger

The court knows that all it would take is one “scandalous statement” from Prince Thomas to end their careers

Wilbur could fire them, but he’s stressed

Any other day, he’s a fucking FORCE to recon with

But Tommy? He’s here to ensure the best or their careers would end

And you know that Tommy has at least 3 sources in the biggest news outlets in the empire

He could get ANYTHING out there

Wilbur’s throne is the biggest in the middle

Two thrones smaller aside him

Within the like office / study / planning room

Tommy's hasn't been used until just then

Tommy finds it quite uncomfy

But he can deal

Also Tommy drops the nicknames for the week or so

No “Big Man”

It was “Will” and “William”

Your Majesty at one or two points

But that felt a little too formal for both of them

Too alienating

Tommy learned a whole fucking lot of fucking politics that week

Not that he didnt listen in his lessons it’s just that

Well

He can’t not listen if he’s not there

It’s different IRL too

Seeing all the decisions

It’s terrifying

And he’s exhausted

Dressing nicely and talking for 12 hours a day about politics

And life / death decisions

So many cuddles dude

Just permanently cuddling if they’re not presently working or “coping”

And I think

That although Wilbur is the one who’s going through it

When they cuddle, Wilbur likes to hold Tommy

Just in the sense that Tommy’s here and safe

In the midst of all the death around Wilbur

He needs to know that his person, his kid is alright

Plus having this one thing this one routine helps him feel a little on control during this out of hand time

:sparkles: Prince Tommy PR leak :sparkles:

I talked about how Tommy was close to his grandmother

and how he was smoking outside of her funeral

maybe it was during that time in his life

really dark place in his mind

smoked and drank every day

Wilbur smoked a lot during that time yet

they probably drank together a few times

like straight up vodka

Just they’re so young and so tired

and so its like, pictures of Wilbur and Tommy (and just Tommy) drinking in the parlor, and in the like, bar area of their private living area, dark eye bags, red eyes, just straight from the bottle

Both of their ties were undone, no jackets, sleeves rolled up to their elbows, Wilbur's top 3 buttons are undone, they're both like manspreading

like they're just at their lowest, particularly Tommy, but Wilbur was having an adjacent bad time

Tommy's hair is a fuckin' mess

HOWEVER, they're both still clean shaven, neither of their shorts or trousers are wrinkled or stained

They may be going through it, but the royal image waits for no one

How does the castle react? Immediate lock down.

Interrogations or some shit

none of the princes are allowed to leave

they have to do clean up

they write scripts essentially for Tommy and Wilbur to adress the press

they need to send out a memo that they don't agree with underage drinking

its all structured, scripted, and written by advisors (and their father)

major damage control

which is just not what Tommy needs right now, because he's like trying to work through his grief

and Wilbur has a fucking fight with his father about that

Phil does not care

They fucked up

Someone else fucked up

And now they’re going to be big boys and fix it Like Phil's going to Tommy's room to get him to look over what his quick press tour and Wilbur jsut stops him in front of the door "He's fucking grieving - Let him have a moment will you? Don't you know how close he was with Gran?" "You messed up. He messed up. Now you're gonna be big boys and fix it." “You’re horrible sometimes you know that?” “I am your father” “Then act like it, your majesty”

meanwhile Tommy: in bed, hasn't slept, major depressive spiral, cuddling Betty, Walter standing guard at his door, holding onto a blanket that his grandmother gave him

just - can't even cry anymore

just empty

Literally just despondent

Staring at the ceiling as Betty noses his face

like good luck getting to get up, let alone read shit

He hasn’t showered in days

He is very much not presentable

like it's only been a week or two since his grandmother's death

and he still is processing

He is no where near done grieving

[imonthinice]

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 2/?

Word Count: 2k

Author’s Note: Y/N - your name, A/N - any name (your best friend’s name)

Warnings: Swearing, no beta bitch we die like Jason Todd

Welcome Back! I have, once again, written more of Jason Todd because he’s a fucking teddy bear and I love him.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

Y/N and Jason both returned from that date feeling all giddy about each other, but trying their dammed-est to not let their hopes get too high about the other. However, that was extremely, extremely hard for Jason to do with family like Dick in his life. It’s like coming home to a hopeless romantic of a shipper as a nosey bitch. Lovingly, of course. No one’s like Dick.

“So, Y/N?” Dick asked Jason immediately as he entered the Manor.

“Yeah, what about her?”

“So, many questions: Was that a date? If no, will there be a date? Is there going to be a second date? Do you like her? Do you think we’ll like her? Does she know you’re Bruce Wayne’s son?” Dick rambled at his little brother.

“Okay hold on god damn, yes it was a date, yes there will be a second, yeah I think she’s cool and I like her, slow your roll Circus Boy, I don’t know when she’ll meet you lot, I don’t think she knows who I am, she’s from Metropolis, so I don’t think she knows the Waynes well.” Jason answered Dick with confidence.

“So you like her!” Steph mocked as she entered the hallway, probably heard her brothers talking about Y/N, so she wanted in on it. Somehow she had evaded Jason’s gaze though, so she startled him immensely.

“Jeez, how many of you will scare me today? And yeah, dumbass, I like her. But I’m doing this magical thing called ‘Not getting my god damn hopes up about her since it’s only the first date’ you hopeless romantic fucks.” Jason barked at them.

“Yeah, but you love us.” Dick said.

“That might be true, but your meddling is only going to cause chaos, Dick and Steph.”

“What about my meddling, Jay?” Bruce asked. Once again, he had heard the talking about Jason’s new crush and decided he’d parent the boy on his girl. Jason jumped out of his skin, because, he had once again, not seen Bruce enter the hallway despite his best efforts to not get startled again.

“You, are going to give me a heart attack.”

“Looks like this girl let your guard down.”

“Can we just go on patrol and stop badgering me?” Jason muttered under his breath.

“Nope!” Barbara exclaimed. Clearly, there’s a pattern with Waynes escaping Jason’s attempts to not get startled today, “We’re still going to badger you, Jay,” Barbara finished.

---------------------------------------

When Y/N made her way back to A/N, she couldn’t help but turn her radio as loud as she could and try to take the longer journey back home. Pieces of quiet and tranquility always surprised and drew her in. Like a good book on a Sunday morning before the rest of the bustling city of Gotham or Metropolis awoke itself. If New York never sleeps, she thought, then what the hell do Gotham and Metropolis call themselves. She laughed.

There were a few good things about Gotham, like the people you’d meet on the street at 4am were some of the weirdest but kindest people you’d ever know. It’s like the city radiated off of the energy of the people in it, and in spite of the villains constantly hitting the city with their worst, somehow everyone never let it get to them. It was admirable. Metropolis was the same in that avenue, but it didn’t feel like the cold Gotham streets.

Y/N thought Jason was one of the kinder people she had met in her travels and classes. And she never thought that she’d meet someone she liked this much in her criminal psychology class of all places, but hey, the universe had different pen strokes for her.

She went and parked her car in the driveway of the rental house she and A/N shared. Only the two of them shared it, but if either of them lost their jobs, they’d be looking for another roommate immediately. Pulling out her bag which was full of notes written by Jason, the original notes written by her, and binders upon binders of criminal cases she was looking into at the time, she would get out of her car and begin walking to her door.

Of course, like most people, she would kick off her heels the minute she walked through the doors of the house, to which, A/N paused her music and went to go question Y/N about Jason.

“So, you know how this works, babes, lay it on me, how’s hottie? Is he kind?” A/N pondered.

“He’s so kind, he paid the printing fees for my notes and rewrote all of them, I guess it’s a system for us now. I write the notes in class while he tries to take it all in, we meet up, and he rewrites them all and pays the printing fee.”

“He paid the fee?! At that college?” A/N said, completely shocked.

“Is that shocking?”

“Well, the printing fees are so fucking expensive, hun. Mans must have daddy’s money to do that.”

“Really? Well regardless money doesn’t matter, he’s kind and I can make a name for myself if I graduate at the top of my class.” She said, fully believing this. Smart woman. She knew she could do it.

“I believe in you, do you have homework tonight? I can make dinner for you so you can study.” A/N offered.

“Nah, I’m just going to go file my notes and shower, I’ll come join you and help after.”

“Well, don’t drown.” A/N joked.

“Do you know how much effort that would take?” She laughed as she walked towards her room, once she got there she pulled out her papers and began the slow filing process of them into her desk.

About 2 minutes into this, she got a text:

Hey stranger.

If someone had a heart monitor hooked up to her, they could have bet their last penny on her heart skipping a beat. 

Hey Jason. She sent back.

I had a fun time today with you, do you want to do the same thing tomorrow, I could use your fast writing skills to get by in classes. And I just like talking to you. What do you say?

She thought. Maybe something legit is here, hopefully I’m not just used for notes. She worried about that, since she was just a tad insecure about him. He was pretty. She knew she was a looker, sure. But he was something more.

I would love to go on another budget date with you.

Budget? Actually yeah, I guess it is budget lol. Maybe next time I’ll actually take you out to lunch like I said I would.

I, honestly, completely forgot you said you’d take me to lunch, I was just having fun as we were talking.

Me too. You’re a hoot.

A hoot? That’s a book nerd statement if I’ve ever heard one. She joked. She didn’t actually know if he was a book nerd at this time, but they had been joking the entire time when she was filing her notes. She was no where near done filing her notes, Jason was a distraction from that, it wasn’t that important, she would end up finishing it later. She just liked some semblance of organization so she didn’t have to put it off.

I’ll have you know I’ve probably read more books than you.

Well book nerds are cute.

Eventually the messages from Jason and Y/N started slowing, Y/N assumed he was tired or working so she took her chance to file her notes and start running her shower.

Sorry Y/N, this has been fun but I’m going to get really sparse with replies, I got work to do.

That’s fine! Where do you work, by the way?

And she got into the shower. Halfway through her shower her phone pinged, she assumed Jason was texting back, so when she finished her shower, before she even got her towel on, she decided to answer him:

I work at Wayne Enterprises with my dad. It’s quite fun.  He had said.

Oh! I’ve heard the owner of Wayne Enterprises is a lovely man, have you met him? She asked him back.

And within an instant, he answered.

He’s my dad, so yeah.

You’re the Jason Todd? Heir to the Wayne Manor and Wayne Enterprises? She started thinking back on what A/N had said. Yep, she thought, Daddy’s money indeed. She started to slip into her pajamas, which were literally a mess and not put together, because this is the real world, not every girl has matching sets, when he answered:

I hope that doesn’t change much, Y/N.

Explains the camera I saw but didn’t mention, and that’s about it.

You saw the cameras? Damn it. I tried to shield you, they may have pictured us together, sorry.

Worth it for a lovely date. I’ve seen worse, my mum works with Clark Kent, who I guess you probably know since he’s Bruce’s best friend, and the paparazzi loves to take Clark’s picture.

Oh yeah, Uncle Clark. Yeah, the pap love him. You get used to it. I guess you somewhat know my family lol.

Nah, that’s about all I know. Wasn’t really interested in drama about you lot because it’s just not my business. Probably not a shared ideal with the general public.

She finished getting dressed and went to go cook with A/N, and share the news.

----------------------------------

“Girl! You were right about daddy’s money oh my god,” Y/N said when she entered the kitchen.

“Go on,” A/N urged.

“You know Jason Todd? Guess what. That’s hottie from Crim Psych 101.”

“Are you serious? That’s insane. You’re probably plastered across the internet right now for that date,” A/N laughed, “are you scared to date a famous man?” She asked.

“No, he’s really sweet and if this gets serious, I can just block out the flashes.”

The two of them laughed and started cooking. A/N was Latina, so, of course, she was in charge to cook most nights. But Y/N made killer desserts and pizza. Tonight was fajitas, so Y/N kind of sat bat and let A/N do her thing. Trying to know more so one day A/N wouldn’t have to do all the work, Y/N went onto the internet and the first thing she saw?

Globally Revered Son of a Millionaire, Jason Todd, out on a DATE with a Mystery Girl?

Like clockwork, Jason answered:

I guess I have a lot to teach you, and I hope you haven’t been on the internet recently.

I have. Globally Revered Son of a Millionaire. She texted back.

Fuck those damn tabloids. He said, she couldn’t help but agree, the paparazzi seem like they’re very invested in stories that aren’t theirs to tell.

Can’t agree with you more. We should put on a show for them tomorrow, actually give them something to write about.

I like your thinking.

You’ve opened up a lot today.

Is it your turn now?

What do you want to know? You asked him before turning to A/N.

“Tabloids talk too much,” you sneered at her.

“Cat should get their tongue and choke on it,” she finished, “did you at least look cute in their pics?” she asked.

“Somehow. Wasn’t even posing,” Y/N finished.

“Well, food’s done, are you still hungry?”

“Always.”

--------------------------------------

Jason turned to his brother, Dick, Nightwing, and said, 

“She knows now.”

“That you’re rich?” he asked.

“Yeah, I guess I have to be more wary of her now,” he sighed, “I hope she’s not in it for the Wayne fortune.”

“Doubt she is if she agreed the tabloids can suck it, Red Hood.”

“I pray you’re right.”

He then drew his guns and fired at the ground underneath their laest venture into crime-fighting. This was gonna be one hell of a ride Y/N embarked on, not even knowing what she was getting into.

[jamielea81]

Conversations

Bonus Chapter: Colorado

Description: Takes place a year and a half after the first bonus chapter Back to the Beginning. The reader and Chris are married with life changes ahead. Original description for the series Conversations: You accompany your friends on a day trip to Animal Kingdom Theme Park where you meet Scott Evans by chance. This one afternoon leads to a year long friendship with both Chris and Scott over text messages and phone calls.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader, Scott Evans

Warning: Slightly NSFW (18+ only!), cursing, talk of pregnancy, fluff, Grumpy and Sassy shenanigans. 

A/N: Look who finally wrote a bonus chapter for Conversations! This girl, right here! Just a little timestamp in the reader and Chris’ life. And of course we needed some Scott time. You do not have to read the series to read this one shot, but it doesn’t hurt. Reblogs, comments, asks, what have you, I enjoy. 

Italics are internal thoughts

**

“Honestly, love, it’s fine,” you spoke softly into the phone, trying your best to keep your voice even. The last thing you want is for him to feel worse than he already does.

“I don’t know…” Chris trailed off. “Usually, when women say the word fine, they really don’t mean, fine.”

“Such a guy,” you chuckle. “I promise, Scott and I are going to have a terrific time. He’s taking care of me and promised not to get us into any trouble.” You raise an eyebrow at your travel companion seated next to you in the hired car.

Chris laughed and then followed it up with a groan. “That does not make me feel better. Put me on speaker.”

You rolled your eyes but did as he asked or rather demanded. “Okay, you’re on speaker.”

“Scott, you better take care of my wife. She’s precious cargo. And she’s carrying precious cargo. So, it’s extra precious cargo.”

You laughed; hand automatically going to your stomach. You were four months along and just starting to show. Family and close friends knew the two of you were expecting your first child, but the tabloids had not caught wind. The two of you had been going back and forth on whether to let People Magazine do an exclusive cover shoot when baby Evans is born. The money earned from People would be donated to charity which was the only reason you were even considering it. Plus, the whole you two breaking the news rather than the public finding out when you weren’t ready. Chris wanted to be the one to introduce his child to the world rather than having paparazzi sneaking into your backyard to get a picture. You couldn’t argue with him there.

“Would you relax! You’re going to give yourself a coronary and then I’d have to take care of both precious cargos and you don’t want that.” Scott shouted.

I really hope the driver doesn’t recognize Scott.

You smacked his arm, taking the call off speaker and bringing it back to your ear. “Chris, we are both going to be just fine. The plane ride was as relaxing as any plane ride can be and we are almost to the hotel. Scott and I are going to pamper ourselves and eat lots of great food. Work is important and I completely understand.”

Chris got called back to Los Angeles for reshoots that he couldn’t get out of. He planned a couple of mini babymoons and this was going to be the first one. Because of your advanced age – insert eyeroll – your doctor had mentioned it may not be safe to travel a lot once you were six months along. Chris took this seriously and booked a trip to Colorado at a gorgeous snowy mountain resort. There wouldn’t be any skiing, just loads of alone time and cuddling by the fireplace. When Chris had to cancel, Scott stepped in and volunteered the cuddles.

“This is one of the many reasons I love you. I’m just disappointed our romantic getaway is now being shared with Scott. My brother,” he said, voice in mock disgust.

“It’s fine. Scott and I haven’t hung out just the two of us in forever.” Scott reached for your hand and gave it a squeeze. “I’ll see you next week.”

“Alright, sweetheart. Have a great time and rest please.”

“You know I will. I love you, babe. Say hi to Pedro for me,” you said, smile evident in your voice.

“I will. Love you too.”

**

“Mr. and Mrs. Evans?” The check in clerk, Barbara according to her nametag asked.

“That’s right,” Scott chimed in, wrapping an arm around your waist. “Newlyweds.”

You forced a smile and bit the inside of your cheek so that you wouldn’t laugh.

“Congratulations!” she replied with a sweet smile on her face.

She tapped her chin with her index finger before going back to her keyboard. “Let’s see what I can do here,” Barbara replied, typing away on the computer in front of her. “We have you in a one-bedroom suite with a mountain view, but,” she paused for dramatic effect. “I’m moving the two of you to one of our honeymoon suites.”

Scott gasped and slapped his hand on the countertop. “That’s mighty nice of you,” he spoke in a fake southern accent.

Where did that come from?

“Me and the misses really appreciate it. Don’t we honey?” he asked, turning his attention back to you.

“My pleasure,” Barbara said before you could reply, laying two room keycards on the counter next to Scott’s hand.

You smiled brightly but kept your mouth closed, so afraid of letting a chuckle out or saying the wrong thing. Scott steered you away from the counter, placing a hand on your bottom.

Once you turned the corner to the bank of elevators, you yanked Scott’s hand off your behind.

“Newlyweds. Really?”

“It got us an upgrade, didn’t it dear?”

**

The first night you were fine. Scott kept you occupied with stories of the single life and the wonders of online dating. You weren’t sure how he did it. Or rather, how he didn’t. After he told you about the guy who wore Barney the dinosaur underwear in a child’s size husky, you laughed until you cried.

“But did you still sleep with him?” you asked wiping the tears from your cheeks.

“Sassy! Of course not. Barneeeeyyyy,” he drawled out.

Shrugging your shoulders, you got up to grab yourself a tissue from the bathroom. Coming back in the room, Scott was on his phone, fingers swiping feverously. You plopped down on the couch, tucking one leg under yourself.

“Here,” Scott said, handing you his phone. On screen was what you would refer to as tall, dark, and handsome.

“He’s hot,” you said, passing the phone back to him.

“Barney.”

“No,” you gasped.

Scott sighed before he started to laugh which got you going once again.

**

The second day you weren’t so fine. The two of you ordered breakfast in the suite. Pancakes dripping with syrup, crispy thick cut bacon, sausage links, a bowl of mixed fruit, and decaf coffee because Scott was in solidarity with you on your caffeine hiatus.

“Let’s go for a walk. There are tons of trails that the resort clears of snow. I need to work off this breakfast,” Scott said patting his stomach.

“You and me both,” you said, getting up to put on actual clothes instead of the pajamas you were still wearing.

“You are so lucky. Get to eat whatever you want and can just blame it on the baby.”

Stopping in your tracks, you turned around to face him, lower lip slightly wobbling. Since the minute you found out you were pregnant, you found it really hard to control your emotions. You knew Scott didn’t mean anything by the commit, but your brain couldn’t help itself.

“I have to work really hard to be healthy. It’s bad enough the doctor said I’m old.” A sob escapes your lips. The tears already starting to roll down your cheeks. “I can’t have any caffeine, can’t eat a lot of my favorite foods, have to cut back on my salt. My salt! You know fries are my jam. Doesn’t help that my husband is built like a fucking Greek God. I’m not a model or an actress. I already feel like Dodger’s poo compared to him.”

Scott was out of his seat before you could utter another word. Strong arm pulling you to his chest while one hand cradled your head.

“Stop that. You are fucking beautiful and frankly my bonehead brother is lucky you agreed to marry him. Do you even know how many times I have had to leave the room in the last two months when he starts talking about you growing his child inside you and that it turns him on?” Scott pulls away slightly an emulates puking.

“Stop,” you said, burying your head in his neck.

“Why is my neck wet, Sassy.”

“It’s snot,” you said with a chuckle, wrapping your arm around him and holding on tight.

“You two are meant for each other.”

After a minute he pulled away and grasped both of your hands. “I’m with you in any way you need. If you need a healthy eating buddy, I am your man. If you want to say ‘to hell with it’, I’ll pick up McDonalds for the two of us every day if you like.”

You wiped at your eyes and leaned in to kiss his cheek. “I love you Grumpy.”

“Love you too,” he replied and then clapped his hands together. “So, are we napping or are we walking?”

“Walking,” you stated, making your way into the bedroom to finally get changed.

That evening, the two of you got dressed up and went to your dinner reservation at the hotel where you were addressed as Mr. and Mrs. Evans. Scott stuck to sparkling water even though you encouraged him to get an alcoholic beverage.

“I don’t need to drink to be the life of the party. You know that.”

He wasn’t wrong. He’d kept you entertained even without the raspberry liquor he force fed you years ago.

“I think we need a dance party when we get back to the room. For old time sakes. Before I am too big to shake it.”

“Done and done.”

The night ended in a bubble bath with both you and Scott in your swimsuits in an oversized soaking tub. Dozens of pictures were taken with many going to your husband. Rather than a text in return, he called.

“What is this? My brother movin’ in on my wife?”

“Babe! You know that it was me and Scott from the start,” you teased.

Chris chuckled. “You go away for a couple of days and it’s like that.”

“You know you are my one and only. Scott’s just making me smile.”

“I know baby. I miss you.”

“I miss you too,” you said.

**

The next day you were weepy. As much as you tried to put on a happy face, you were missing Chris. Pregnancy hormones or not, Chris had been working a lot and you had barely seen each other. This romantic babymoon wasn’t what you had in mind. Yes, spending it with your best friend was great, but it wasn’t the same.

The fire place was roaring while Magic Mike was queued up on the flat screen. You and Scott were dressed in jeans and cable knit sweaters with fuzzy socks on your feet. The snow was coming down heavy which was fine with you since neither of you had any place to be.

Pop in hand, though you wouldn’t let Scott hear you call soda that, diet for you, regular for him, the only thing you were needing was Dodger’s wet nose on your stomach and Chris.

“You know, Chris can do that,” you said pointing at the screen where one of the dancers picked up an audience member like she weighed a pound.

“No. Stop. Do not ruin this movie for me. I do not need to picture what you and my brother do.”

“Scott, you do know where babies come from, right?”

“Gross.”

You chuckled, standing up to excuse yourself to the bathroom. Why you brought up Chris when you already cried twice this morning was beyond you. After using the bathroom, you cleaned up your face and stepped back into the living room of your suite.

Scott draped himself over the couch, phone in hand, eyes shifting between the screen of his phone and the TV.

“I think I’m going to take another bath. Need to relax a little bit.”

Scott looked up. “Not too hot.”

“Yes, dad,” you said, offering him a mock salute.

You kept the bath water warm, but added extra oils and bubbles to make it feel more luxurious. The lights were off but a few candles were lit and your phone played 90s R&B. You snapped a pic of your soapy legs and sent it to Chris. Within a few minutes you had a reply.

Chris: My brother better not be in there

Y/N: I’m all alone

Chris: We can’t have that

You heard the door open and you scolded yourself for not locking the door. This text conversation seemed to be heading into rated R territory. You did not need Scott to witness that.

“Scott,” you drawled out. “I’m not wearing my suit tonight. Get out of here.”

When you heard the distinct sound of a belt buckle, you turned around. Rather than Scott dropping his pants, it was Chris.

You gasped, mouth hanging open.

“Room for one more sweetheart?”

You nodded your head unable to form words but those tears had no trouble forming.

Chris continued to undress while you tried your best to compose yourself. He joined you a moment later slipping in behind you.

“How? I thought you were working.”

“I put in some long hours so that I could get to you. I was miserable without you.”

“I know that feeling,” you replied, leaning your head against his chest. Chris lightly rubbing your stomach before sliding his hands up to your breasts, fingers tips rubbing against your nipples. “Babe, did you lock the door?” you asked.

“Don’t worry, I got Scott another room.”

You reached your left hand behind you grabbing on to Chris’ head bringing his mouth to yours. Chris kissed you deeply, your back automatically arching at the taste of his tongue.

“Was he mad?” you asked.

“I don’t even care,” he replied, rubbing his nose against yours.

“Neither do I.”

Tagging: @tanelle83 @pinknerdpanda @allaboutthebooz @estillion14 @panicfob @patzammit @xoxabs88xox @heartislubbingdubbing @twittytelly @linki-locks11 @ab-baybay @impalaimages @jesseswartzwelder @rainbowkisses31 @xostephanie @smoothdogsgirl @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @xxloki81xx @firstangeldragonranch @soitmightgetweird @maeleeme @denisemarieangelina @rvgrsbrns @icanfeelastormbrewing @kitkat1690 @smilexcaptainx @dangerouslovefanfic@kelbabyblue @sweetlittlegingy @dont-need-another-fandom @chrisevansforever @evansxxx @southerngracela @bitterstar88 @squirrelnotsam @kitkatd7 @marvelislove10 @the-doctors-fallen-angel @hista-girl @cocomel0613 @also-fangirlinsweden @mustangshelby04 @bellaireland1981 @carolina-thiell @straightforwardly @torntaltos @denise1605 @mcuclintasha @iam-cj @trynnabemultifandom @chrisevansforever @kelbabyblue @broadwayandnetflix @kyjey @thevelvetseries​ @i-just-feel-like @daddieslittlefangirl @stankface @im-not-an-armrest-im-short @whymalu @mariswritingforfun @tessabb7​ @lakamaa12​ @deidrashouseofpain @the-murder-strut-murdered-me @greyeyedsmile14 @dangerouslovefanfic @ripvandrinkle @bitterstar88 @zestygingergirl @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall @onceuponathreetwoone @supraveng @michelehansel @fanfictionaffair @agirlcanstilldream @what-is-your-plan-today @jessyballet @capstopavenger @wiczer @titty-teetee

[stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland]

PR stunt relationships - ɟ

🎶🎶 Guess who’s back, back, back? Back again, gain, gain 🎶🎶

Heeello, my babies! 🥰 How are you? I hope you’re all fine and that you’re staying strong since, as we knew and expected, they’re literally attacking us every day with these PRs. And today’s topic is precisely about this. PR-stunt relationships.

What do I know about- What do I know about love? Nothing. And that’s why it’s everything. Sorry, I had to 😅🤣. Shout-out to ‘What Do I Know About Love?’ by CC. No but, seriously tho. What do I know about a PR stunt relationship? Again, I’m not an expert on the subject. I know as much as you do, plus, maybe a little bit more due to my research over the years.

🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁

PR stunt relationship, also known as PRomance, showmance, fauxmance (👈🏽 cover for celebrities who are both queer), and also as 🤫😂 ‘extremely camera-ready relationship’. I can personally define a PR as a work of persuasion. Picture PR people as shapers, as narrators, as storytellers, because that’s what they do. Whether it’s for protection, or to build or rebuild an image, or simply for promotion, they analyze the situation in order to create the best publicity/narrative/farce that benefits their client. They each have their own vision. Each of them has a plan that they sometimes tend to repeat with other clients because it works. Take as an example our friend Scooby Doo Sc**ter (Br**n), who is making it increasingly normal and common for his clients to use engagement rings as narratives.

A PR stunt relationship is nothing more than a PUBLICITY STUNT, as the word itself implies, aimed to get people and media attention. Publicists and celebrity management managers set up a fake public relationship to make fans and the general public believe it’s true. To give the couple more credibility, also friends, family, and artists friends of the couple get involved many times. To give you a practical example, let’s take PRen Tyren. They were at least 80% involved in each other’s lives.

Think about their birthdays and all the friends and families involved. Think about when Tymber even went to Graciela’s birthday, L’s great grandmother. Think about Tyres and brother Jauregui (who even made a song out of it with him). Think about L and Angel Gold (his sister). Think about L and Jailynn (his daughter). Think about The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, aka Tyren and, I think they were called Galsey? (Halsey and G-Eazy). Think even about Dinah who was part of the PR. I mean, you got it, right?

This type of business, whether involves the music industry, the film industry, the sports industry, etc., works this way for EVERYONE. They get at the same goal but with different tactics for each individual person, and they give a damn if in the meantime the person, their client, is bullied, or hated, or if they receive death threats, or if they start having anxiety problems, panic attacks, mental or physical health problems, etc. They don’t give a shit about their well-being in general. It’s just business to them. They’re just money with two legs. Can you picture a rolled-up dollar with two legs, can’t you? Good, because that’s what they are. Products. Products to sell.

There’s a very strict contract that both parties have to mutually agree on, and this contract is called a relationship contract. A relationship contract is a legally binding document for the duration of at least one year. It’s very VERY own custom-made because they write down what do they want to happen, then the duration (which can be extended) and the termination, and all the other things that each of them wants to include. The duration of a contract obviously varies from person to person and can depend on many things. But the main thing is that, it depends on the type of goal they want to achieve thanks to it.

For example, if the purpose is purely publicizing, such as the promotion of an album, or a movie, or whatever else, the relationship will last only for the necessary time that it takes to increase the interest of the public and indeed, to publicize the project. Another example could be when they want to hide the sexuality of one of the two people in the couple or both. Here, the duration of the contract could reach up to years, and could even lead to fake marriages.

We have examples of people who have done this to promote movies/sagas/franchises: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, Zac Efron and Vanessa Hudgens. We have examples of people who have done this to promote TV series: Blake Lively and Penn Badgley, Lili Reinhart and Cole Sprouse, Chad Michael Murray and Sophia Bush. We have examples of people who have done this to hide their true sexuality: Ricky Martin & Rebecca De Alba (for 17 motherfucking years), TS and.. and-and-and EVERYONE. We have examples of people who have done this to increase their notoriety, but then fell in love for real despite being super toxic for each other: Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez. We even have examples of real couples who have been asked to go public to boost ratings and publicize their show more than it already was per se: Lea Michele and Cory Monteith. [Yes, my friends, even real couples do PR stuff for publicity purposes]

Celebs fake relationships for profits. Profits such as more fame, more fans, more acquaintances, whether they were made together or thanks to or of the ‘partner’ themselves based also on the industry fields to which they are part, more freedom in other aspects of their life, both work and private, etc., and of course, money. The money profit received varies. It varies according to the duration (especially if they’re many years), to what they’re supposed to do, such as how many times they’re forced to kiss (yes, guys, that also counts), to the amount of time they have to spend together, aka being seen together, etc. It also and above all vary, based on how famous they are, or if one of them is not famous at all, or if one of them is more famous than the other. It’s obvious that the more famous the person is, the more money they receive. Both parties benefit from it, but the person who ACCEPTED to do the PR is obviously paid more also based on the notoriety they have as I told you. Here we start with a minimum of $5,000 received per month. The figure can also reach disproportionate numbers with five/six zeros per year.

It’s enough to think that 75/80% of all famous couples are fake. They gain more attention and ultimately, more money, and at the same time, fans and GP can witness an exciting ‘love story’ filled with drama, gossip, rumors, mysteries, and if they decide to end their story on a negative note, even with the possible and eventual shade-throwing which in turn leads to more attention, more gossip, etc., etc. Exactly how the teams on both sides wanted. You have to keep in mind that teams have the power in this case. It’s the PR teams who hold the power over the media to control the narrative, and not the other way around.

There are also many factors involved to keep in mind. People involved. We have friends, parents, paparazzi, and all those other people the celeb team involves to make the story look as believable as possible. For example, you know when the media say it was a source who gave them the news? Well, that’s the truth. Think about it. Those sources and those insiders are really insiders because they’re part of the team. They are those people who work for them and who release information, whether true or fake, to follow the narrative decided for the plan. Speaking instead of another topic that I’ve noticed in many asks. Paparazzi.

I don’t know if you know how paparazzi usually work, but especially the old-fashioned stalker type ones, are not known to hold back, in fact, on the contrary, they go way too far beyond the limits. Some of them know where the celebrities might be based on how popular the location is (clubs, restaurants, etc., where celebs often go), or other times, they’re called by waiters, valets, drivers, etc., etc. It’s a pretty aggressive and competitive industry, and paparazzi do everything they can to get images of famous people to sell to a newspaper or a magazine or on Instagram. There are differences between those in the US, those in Europe, etc. Many are also easy to control since eight times out of ten, it’s an organized thing.

As we well know, most of the time, the paparazzi are told where to be and when, probably by the celebrity’s PR agency itself. It’s ALL for publicity. Publicity of any kind. To promote a movie if it’s an actor, to promote an album if it’s a singer, to be noticed if that person’s project was a flop, for fake relationships or to ‘cover’ the real ones if one of the two is in a relationship that is not seen in a good light and therefore doesn’t suit the public eye, or if one of the two or both of them are queer. Seriously, for everything. And so they have paparazzi following them around so it looks like they’re more popular than they actually are, and the celebrities who make me laugh the most are those who, after calling them, act like the paparazzi were following them everywhere, some even getting angry and taking it out on them.

But it must also be said that celebrities who really don’t want the paparazzi’s attention, make sure that this doesn’t happen. Unlike the ones who want them and even have them called. There are many celebrities who want their pictures taken because, as we also know, any publicity is good publicity. These celebrities know how it works and not only accept that the paparazzi are part of the business, but use them as a tool for their publicity. It’s just business for them and a new opportunity to look good in magazines. They want to be in control of their image and in this way, they have it.

Also, some brands pay celebs to wear their clothing or accessories while out and about, and those staged shots that look like candid of a celebrity leaving a restaurant or a store, actually have multiple purposes, namely: celebrity endorsement of the product, big check for the celebrity for wearing the item, collaboration between the celebrity and paparazzi to get nice shots that look natural and random from which the celebrity then selects the ones they prefers, and image sales for the paparazzi agency. Everyone gets paid and everyone is happy.

Another thing to take into consideration? Depending on the celebrity’s profession, even their own contracts. In the sense that most of their contracts involve fake relationships. It also depends on the image that the celeb has and whether they’re trying to hide their sexuality. From this, their contracts can include a minimum of two PRs, or five, or eight, or even one that lasts for many years. They can also state that the same person with whom the celebrity has already had a PR in the past, may be again in the future. I’ll give you a practical example.

Imagine yourselves and a friend as a celebrity, okay? You guys are singers and your friend is an actor. You’ve just signed a 3-album deal lasting 5 years (meaning you have 5 years to complete and release 3 albums), and your friend an 8-year movie saga contract (let’s imagine 3 movies). Now let’s imagine that there are clauses in both your contracts that also include fake relationships. Your contract has two, and your friend’s contract has five, including one with one of their co-stars. Both of you must, ABSOLUTELY, have the number of PRs chosen for you over the course of those years, otherwise, you’re gonna be forced not only to fight a lawsuit that you will lose because you haven’t respected the contract, but also to pay a penalty that can reach up to six figures.

Doesn’t this ring a bell? Now do you also understand why Ca*ren, and most of the other celebrities, are forced to have PR stunt relationships? Because they have to! Because it’s part of their contracts if they want to keep doing what they do. Many of them have a say. They can decide whether or not to accept the person chosen for them, they can choose a person themselves, they can negotiate something in return if they accept a person they didn’t want, etc., etc. But many have no say in it.

And speaking of our Camr*n, more specifically, our L, and Kris. Guys… All the comments I’ve read around… *help* 🤦🏻🤦🏻🤦🏻

L didn’t invite Kris there because he’s her boyfriend. And it certainly wasn’t her the one who asked her dad to delete the post because she didn’t want her fans to start attacking her new boyfriend or because she wanted to protect her relationship. IT WAS ALL DONE ON PURPOSE. Mi*e posted the picture and then deleted it ON PURPOSE! Why? Because (L and Kris’ teams) wanted the fans to see the picture to speculate! They wanted the fans to start attacking him! They want people to talk about it!! Is that really that hard to understand or to believe? Welcome to Tyren 2.0, my friends. That’s how it started with Taco Delivery Symbol, or did you forget that too? Go read the timelines if you really don’t remember.

I’ve lost count of how many times they’ve put off releasing L’s album over the years. They’d finally decided, and then it was postponed AGAIN, but because of COVID. EVERYONE had to postpone their programs actually, but L’s album was supposed to be released 100% this year (in September, in my opinion). Her PR should have started earlier. This is the only reason we have only had hints of Crispy McBacon (I’ve already found so many nicknames for his transphobic ass, sorry but I just can’t help myself) over time. Because they have postponed several times! *And also because, in my opinion, they were still looking for an alternative. The choice had to be between a guy (him) and a girl.*

But hey, at least they have an excuse to make this PR more real, you know? I’m already picturing what she’ll say because we all know the script by now: “Kris and I’ve been dating for a while now. I’m a private person. My personal life is my personal life and I want to protect my shit, you know? I don’t like it when people judge my life choices and that’s why I’ve never talked about it before. And I’d like it to stay that way”. Picture me shouting a “SURE, JAN!” when that happens, also because we will then slowly have more and more of their content. Aww, I’m already picturing them playing fake lovebirds and talking to each other in Spanish IN FRONT of a camera, in a live or an Insta-story maybe? 🤮🤮🤮

And speaking of postponed programs…

This is my version of how things could’ve turned out for our oh so beloved IwanttobeknownMila. Keep these dates in mind. Shon Mentos: The Tour, started on March 7, 2019, and ended on December 21, 2019. The Romance Tour, was supposed to start on May 26, 2020, and end on September 26, 2020.

They could’ve released Shirt’s documentary around the beginning of the Romance Tour. They could’ve made them break up almost at the end of the Romance Tour. He would’ve completed the album now, to then releasing it in January or February almost simultaneously with Cinderella’s release.

Why all this? Simple, cross-publicity or cross-promotion or whatever you want to call it. Choke recently said that they’d initially finished filming at the end of his tour and that they had to cut out a lot of parts. And what does all this mean? That the original documentary was another one.

In my opinion, the original was supposed to about his life on tour and only a small part, sneak peeks about the creation of Wonder. Instead, thanks to COVID, they changed direction and made it all about his album. The reason why they had to cut a lot of parts, was to make room for the last few months and therefore to the completion of the album. Which is why I think they finished filming in September/October (if anyone of u knows more, please feel free to let me know).

Without COVID they could’ve released his original documentary more or less around the beginning of the Romance Tour. News, tabloids, and people would’ve talked about them, both for the documentary and for the tour of our Mila= cross-promotion. They could’ve made them break up almost at the end of the Romance Tour. The distance, the misunderstandings, and why not, even the pathetic excuse that Toilet Brush used now when ‘they were in crisis/on a break’, that is, that he hadn’t been opened and vulnerable with her. People would’ve talked about them, Shitmila fans would’ve rebelled and cry their eyes out, news and tabloids would’ve gone crazy for who would tell the story better= cross-promotion. He would’ve completed the album now, with half of the songs he already had (from 3 years) and that he’s using on this album, and a half with songs that would’ve been about his broken heart, to then releasing it in January or February almost simultaneously with Cinderella’s release. Do I need to say this? You can imagine what would’ve happened, right? And what would that have led to? Oh yeah. Cross-promotion!

But anyway, guys, it didn’t happen. Just as we didn’t get L’s album as we hoped. But try to remember one thing, okay? Tyren’s contract started because L needed a new male PR and then they flipped the cards around and continued for him AS AGREED initially. Shakerstoremila’s one, on the other hand, is only and exclusively for HIM. It’s centered on him and will continue to be on him until the end. There’s no point in asking yourselves why Paruparo does this and why Paruparo does that, okay? She HAS TO do it. It’s in her contract and she cannot legally break it if she doesn’t want to face the consequences HER HERSELF has accepted. The sooner you understand this, the sooner you accept it, the sooner you can wait for the end more calmly. It sucks, I know. But that’s the way it is.

I’ve never liked Shon that much in the past. I discovered his existence only and exclusively thanks to Paruparo (IKWYDLS). I’ve always seen him as too fake and with a huge ego. I first became aware of his giant ego during the interview they did in 2015 at The Late Late Show with James Corden. Indeed, I’ve always wondered how someone like Mila could be friends with such an egocentric person. But you know how it is, I just brushed it off because I simply didn’t care about him, and also because at the time (2016 when I officially entered the fandom) the IKWYDLS era was already over for a while. BUT, my first impression of him became very true years later when they started this ridiculous charade.

Not only is he self-centered and with a huge ego, he’s also one of the most fake people I’ve ever seen. Why am I saying this? Because although I don’t know him and consequently, I don’t know if he was already like that before he became famous, Shon is the typical empty celebrity without a personality that has become the role he was set to be in the beginning. The perfect product. They wanted to sell the good guy. The sensitive and different from the others (and that’s where the bullshit of being a ‘singer-songwriter’ came from). And since this idea in itself only partially worked, they made him work on his body so they could sell that too. To sell the unreachable good guy. Superman, as he defines himself 😂. The problem of Shawn and his team, is with people who have not stopped to just look at the fake goody to shoes image that they wanted and want to continue selling.

The way I see him, Shoe’s just a selfish kid. Everything always revolves around him. Everything is and must be about him. He lives to be loved. He lives for the attention. He lives for the approval of others. Everyone must necessarily like him. There’s no one else besides him. Do you know what he reminds me of? He reminds me of a child who asks his mom for attention. ‘Mommy, how did I do? You liked it, didn’t you? Was I good? I can do better if you want, I know I can do better’. I don’t even think he realizes he’s like that because he’s so full of himself and so clouded by himself. Oh and, you know what I’ve been realizing lately? Many of his fans really believe he grew his hair out because Paruparo asked him to (I’d never have believed this bullshit even under torture), but now more than ever I’m convinced that he did it to copy one of his obsessions for years, that is, Matthew McConaughey. My personal problem with this look of his is the fact that he’s now starting to look more and more like Jon Snow (any Game of Thrones fans like me here?), aka one of the characters I can’t stand the most of that amazing TV series. And this, is making me dislike him even more.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that I hate him and that I consider him the devil. In fact, I think there’s a lot but A LOT worse than him out there. I really, REALLY, dislike him, but I don’t hate him. Do I follow him on social media? Yes, but only on IG. Did I listen to his music? Yes, but illegally, and I liked some of his songs because as usual, I distinguish the art from the artist. I’ve never bought his music, I’ve never streamed it, I’ve never gone to one of his concerts, and the only views I’ve ever given him are only for music videos (not even all of them) on YouTube and only because other channels can’t violate copyrights by taking and posting them on their own. Indeed, you know how I’m gonna listen to his album? Thanks to the YouTube channels of his fans who will post his songs.

But anyway. I’ve dwelt too much on #pleasenoticeme #pleaseloveme, I’d say that’s enough. I’m gonna conclude with my final thoughts on the main topic of my post, that is, the fake PR relationships. I wanna explain to u guys why a fake relationship like Shazam’s and our Mila’s is so obvious as PR.

A PR relationship MUST create doubt in people’s heads and MUST NOT look perfect at all. Why? Because otherwise people WOULD NOT TALK ABOUT IT. If it looked like a basic relationship, a common relationship, people wouldn’t talk about it because they wouldn’t find anything strange about it. They wouldn’t speculate, they wouldn’t look for clues, they wouldn’t watch every move. They wouldn’t be thirsty. They’d just get bored. Yes, there would be the initial boom of the ‘new couple’, but then everything would end and people would move on to look for something else to entertain them. The main point of a PR relationship is to make people speculate, and if people don’t constantly talk about it, then it would be all pointless because it would make no sense to create a fake relationship in the first place.

Way to stop this act or any other act? Stop giving them fucking attention! You want to talk about it, speculate, look for evidence, and make theories amongst you friends? Do it! That’s great actually. I do it myself. But fucking tagging them?? 🤨😒🙄

If all the fans who know the real TRUTH stop talking about it by tagging them, tweeting them, etc. their ‘story’ would end. Sure, their teams would try to create something to attract attention again, like a kiss or a scoop, but if ignored even then, everything would end immediately. Why? Precisely because they were unable to complete their task. And in that case, the two celebs would ‘break up’ with a big scandal that would still bring attention back to them, although in this case, the attention would FINALLY be on both celebrities in a singular way and no longer as a couple. The next goal would be for fans and media to find out ‘what happened’ and ‘why’, while for managers it would be to create a scoop on those questions that keep them talking about them, and if all goes well, maybe even get them ‘back together’, and so on, until they have a better idea. But, if they fail even then, even though they’ve not reached the date scheduled in the contract, they would ‘break up’ without any more surprises.

And that’s all for now, my fellows CS. Remember to hold on and to not lose hope. Be patient. And above all, try not to freak out and get very angry as soon as you listen to the album. We already know it’s all bullshit.

I’m sending you a virtual hug 🤗🤗 Always with love, F ❤️

[chosetherose]

SUBMISSION:

Hi. I believe this Miami house is really Karlie's. I think Jerk just took advantage of the publicity and the moment his brother moved there to get all the "The couple is moving to Miami" headlines to cement his happily married straight man card.

1) I've always been of the opinion that whenever Jerk is actually with Karlie to do a stunt, he appears in a video. Other than that, I believe the weird pics he posts of her, most were taken by someone else and he just took credit for himself. Some pics were taken during these stunts where he appears a short video, usually posted by Karlie in a storie or in her year summary compilations. There is a lot of evidence that Jerk uses photos and videos of other people and they pretend that he was the one who made them in a private moment of the couple. Derek has already affirmed this in a post and also when Karlie was in Paris in July, they sold the DM the news that the couple was taking the baby to visit the city's museums, and showed a video, as if Jerk had done, when in fact the one who accompanied Karlie and the baby to the museum was her assistant, Nicolette Lions.

2) My suspicion that Jerk has no connection with this house is the fact that since the house was purchased, her family has stayed there numerous times. At Easter, a period before and after the pregnancy and even a dinner Kimby's engagement (even Krsitine's boyfriend was in the family photo, but Jerk wasn't, even though it pic was taked in "his own house"). I know Karlie is very close to her family, but it's weird that you see her relatives more than her "husband" in "his" own house. See how many times Jerk made sure to be seen walking in or out, or on the balcony of "their" apartment in NY. Or during the times they were in Bedford before and during isolation (even if only 2 or 3 times during the pandemic, and in those times Mikey was with them, Jerk appeared in videos, to "prove" that he was isolated with KK, when actually an employee of his said he was with MH in another cabin together with friends). However, in Miami, the only photo of Jerk in this house was the stunt right after the baby was born, when they were photographed "without realizing it" on the lawn with a friend and a baby, by a paparazzi on a boat right in front of the backyard. "theirs" (and they didn't see 🙄👍🏼). Ah! And in the photo he posted on Mikey's birthday, where MH appears kissing KK's belly. Probably Jerk was there to do a stunt. Karlie has been seen entering the house, she has already posted a video of a virtual meeting together with Penni and her KWK employees in the house's kitchen, made some Kayda's posts there, in the kitchen and in the closet. She took photos on the porch of the house, photos of a possible pregnancy rehearsal by the pool and photos for Adidas.

The Kloss have relatives in Florida and have a history of taking the Kloss sisters on a few weeks in the state for years, even before K and T met. There are several photos in Kar's sisters' IG and even her IG. I don't quite remember why, but one mutual believed that all the Kloss were in Miami during this period, which was right after the birth. He had shown me that when Kimby posted pictures of her telling her family that she got engaged via facetime, they tried to cover it up with separate calls, but it seems that in the images of papa and mama Kloss there was something identifiable that they were with Karlie in Miami, as well as from the other sisters. Once again, even Kristine's boyfriend showed up on roll call, but Karlie was alone. Jerk once again excluded from important family moments.

In short, as Karlie is a millionaire businesswoman and the Kloss family has a history of vacationing in the city for over a decade, I believe she bought this house for the Kloss family. That would justify all the time the family spent there. Even Derek spent a few days at the house earlier this year, but there was no sign of KK there. Almost as if Kar had lent her summer home to her best friend.

[sabraeal]

Seven Swipes for Shirayuki, Chapter 3

[Read on AO3]

Written for @fade-touched-obsidian‘s birthday, which was....nearly two months ago. BUT IT IS DONE NOW, and quite frankly two months is better than some of my other late-birthday posts 🤣

The sedan is stifling.

It may be the luxury size, purchased through the deep pockets of the Wisteria’s business accounts, but the real leather interior presses in too tight, crushing her beneath the weight of her choices. This is what Shirayuki’s leaving behind: plush seats and plastic dividers, penthouse views and double ovens, the sort of security only money could buy.

She’d never wanted it; it had all just come part and parcel of being with Zen, the baseline for orbiting in the same stratosphere as his social circle. None of it had ever felt natural; guilt dogged her every time she slipped into the back seat of an empty car instead of the front, every dish left in the sink for the cleaning service smacked of superiority, and having a doorman--

Well, she’d been late to more than a few galas because she got caught up chatting. It was rude to just blow by someone without even a hello, and if Antonio had a new picture of his granddaughter, she couldn’t possibly pass without a coo or two over the sweet Sharpei of a baby his daughter, the light of his life, had given birth to.

Haruka had frowned at that one, digging the corners of his mouth to new depths as he told her, one is not late to a charity gala because they are indulging The Help.

Shirayuki tightened her arms around her diffenbachia, burying her face in its spotted leaves. It’s so clear now, so obvious: she was never going to fit in. There was never going to be room for her in Zen’s life. She was never going to be able to turn off the parts of her that saw other people as people; even if she could, she would never want to. Not even for him.

The radio flicks on, the smooth strains of Clair de Lune tumbling through the air, making the cab lighter, more spacious.

“Debussy?” she hums, the diffenbachia rustling with her curiosity. “I wouldn’t have pegged you as a classical lover.”

Obi huffs, affront entirely feigned. “I’m a man of many depths.”

Shirayuki lifts her head, looking at the console’s digital display. “It was a preset, huh?”

His mouth twitches. “It was a preset. I thought you might like it better than smooth jazz or whatever else comes standard with wood interiors.”

“Probably.” She shifts back, removing her whole head from her leafy escape and settling it on the rest. It’s fine; she’ll be fine. Maybe it took six years to figure out what she should have known in six months, but she knows better now. No compromising, not like...that. Not with how she lives her life.

“So.” Obi’s gloves tighten on the wheel, leather creaking against leather. “You’re single now.”

Shirayuki nearly drops the whole vase. Not that it has far to go from her lap to the floor, but her plants have been shaken up enough the past few days. “E-excuse me?”

“For a whole--” he checks the dash with a grin that can mean nothing but trouble-- “forty-five minutes.”

“It’s been a week,” she reminds him primly, squeezing the diffenbachia for support. “Ever since--”

(”I can explain,” Zen says, fingers spiking runnels through his hair. “I wanted to do this in person--”)

“Sure,” Obi interjects smoothly. “But it’s only been forty-five minutes since you moved out of your sugar daddy’s apartment.”

“Zen was not my-- my--” the sedan is soundproof; Obi informed them all of it the moment he’d driven it off the lot, even if the way he said it had made Mitsuhide snap his name like a whip crack. She lowers her voice anyway. “Daddy.”

Obi’s hum does not fill her with confidence.

“He was only seven months older than me!” she huffs. “It’s biologically impossible for him to be a big brother let alone a-- a father.”

“Daddy is a state of mind, not an age gap. Though I’ll grant you--” his teeth flash, quick as a bear trap-- “boss doesn’t have much of that going for him either.”

It would undermine her point entirely to start arguing this one-- lord knows she doesn’t have a single horse in the race on how daddy Zen is anymore, if she ever did-- but her gut instinct is to hunker down on this hill and die on it. One she stifles successfully.

It’s not her job to staunchly defend Zen Wisteria anymore, and certainly not from Obi. And to be fair, out of any of them, she trusts Obi to have the most sense of...daddy, whatever that may be. Hopefully, he’ll never enlighten her.

“I didn’t take any of his money.” Every word tips stiffly from her tongue. “Nothing...personal. Only what was given to me as an employee.”

Beneath his shades, Obi softens. “I know that, Miss. I wasn’t trying to say...” He sighs, leather gloves flexing on the wheel. “That wasn’t my point.”

Her fingers ease where they splay over the pot. “Then what was?”

It’s the wrong thing to say. His mouth twitches at a corner, and--

“Isn’t it about time to find a new one?”

“You know,” Obi hums, fumbling with the guest house keys. “You can’t ignore the question forever.”

She squints up at the sky-- it’s a pure blue here, not covered with the haze that settles over most of LA, the one way to tell they’re no longer in the city anymore-- and sniff, “I think you’ll find I can.”

“Come on, Miss.” With a bump of his hip, the door swings open, the bags dangling from his shoulder helping it complete its arc instead of clapping back on him. Because it’s not a thin little beach screen, made to shiver open at the slightest touch, but a solid, weighted thing, made to hold up against everything but an LAPD battering ram. And maybe even then.

Shirayuki spares it a concerned glance, nearly missing as Obi adds, “You need to secure your future.”

“I thought that was what I was doing,” she mutters, toeing off her tennis shoes by the door. “Or am I working for Izana for my health now?”

Obi clucks his tongue, unceremoniously dropping their bags in the hall. “Well sure, but you should be doing it the fun way.”

Her eyebrows climb up the short jaunt to her hairline. “Am I to take it that the ‘fun way’ is on my back?”

“Can’t think of many things that are more fun,” he laughs, like she should know, like at her age this is an experience they must be able to share. She pads down the hall after him, shoulder rounding over her cross arms. Clearly she’s had the opportunity. Six years in a relationship; anyone else would have, but--

“At least,” he continues, words scattering her thoughts like crows on a wire, “you should be able to live off being pretty.”

She coughs out a laugh. “I think you have to be a good deal prettier than me to manage that.”

He hesitates at the end of the hall, natural light limning his long limbs, making him seem taller, broader than he is. His head turns, just enough to catch her in one eye, and the look he rakes up her--

“Maybe in this town,” he rasps.

Her hands fall numb against the twill of her trousers, and she begs them to do something, anything but lay there boneless; to reach out the scant space between them--

But the moment’s gone, quick as it starts.

“Ooh, look at this,” Obi says with a whistle. “There’s a kitchen.”

“The apartment had a kitchen too, you know.”

Obi barely looks up from the drawer he’s inspecting, fussing with something that looks both like a corkscrew and a garlic press. “Yeah but this one’s bigger. It’s got double ovens.”

“We already had double ovens,” she deadpans. “There’s only two of us, we don’t need a kitchen the size of--”

“Ooh,” he sighs rapturously, “there’s a gas range and a cook top.”

“What?” She scurries over beside him, playing a hand on the cold metal. Opa would have killed for a set up like this. “Oh, now that can make a lot of pancakes.”

“And bacon,” he adds, giving it a solid tap. “And check out that view.”

His arm snakes around her shoulders, turning her. “Wha--?”

Oh. Oh.

“The beach,” she murmurs, watching the surf crash against the rocks, right at her feet. Or beneath her feet, from how the cliff is shaped. “It’s right down there.”

“I bet it’s private,” Obi murmurs, voice rumbling against her ear. “Except for paparazzi and their telephoto lenses, of course.”

She waves him away, like a horse does with flies. “Beaches are public property, and trying to restrict access is wrong on an ethical level, never mind that--”

“Right, but consider,” he hums, batting away her hands and her protests, “that you don’t have to share it with anyone else.”

Well, he does have a point there. “But public beaches always have the best snack stands.”

“We can just bring our own snacks.” He waggles his eyebrows. “You could have one of your weird little veggie boards down there because you can just carry it.”

“There’s nothing weird about enjoying vegetables.” Her elbow prods at his side; it’s solid beneath the cotton of his button-down, barely flinching even when she nudges him square in the oblique. “You just have the palate of a kindergartner.”

Obi presses a scandalized hand to his chest, silk tie rumpling askew beneath his palm. “Please, Miss, you wound me. I select my snacks with no personal regard for health or authority, which is fourth grade at least.”

She bats away his hands to slip her fingers around the knot, tugging it straight. “You’ll eat hummus.”

“Because it tastes good with pita chips. Now, Miss...” He casts a quick glance toward the second floor, mouth already twitching. “Do you think our rooms are adjoined?”

Shirayuki blinks, trying to imagine a purpose for it. The guest house itself was mystery enough-- after all, any business partner Izana wanted to impress would stay at a property of their own, or failing that a hotel, somewhere they could guarantee no Wisteria would be listening when they went to decompress from the day. And a personal guest of Izana--

Well, all his family lived within driving distance. And his friends were...few and local, if his soirees were any indication. “Why would they be?”

“For old time’s sake.” His smile’s all trouble as he saunters to the stairs. “Just like Tanbarun.”

“Hopefully not just.” Although Shirayuki can firmly say that having the breaks cut at Vitsjo was the worst experience she’s ever had with a millionaire, a double kidnapping ranks somewhere in the top ten. 

She nearly says so; the quip is hanging at the end of her lips, poised to jump. But she glances up first, just in time to see every muscle in Obi’s body gone stiff, his jaw locked tight and his gaze a hundred miles away.

No. Five years. His body might be here with her, standing in a guest house the size of her childhood home, but his mind is back there, in a room that’s empty and a balcony door hanging on its hinges.

“Obi...” she breathes.

His body jerks, like someone’s yanked all his strings, and when he turns his smile hangs wrong from his mouth, never quite reaching his eyes. 

“I hope the beds are those big fuck off kind,” he says, words hurtling from him joylessly. “That seems like His Majesty’s style. The kind that can fit five people and all their emotional baggage.”

His knuckles are white where they wrap around the wrought-iron banister, clenched so hard she’s sure black will flake off when he moves it. She takes a single, painful step toward him. “Obi...”

“Oh dear,” a voice hum, pleasant and smooth like suede. “I’m so sorry to disappoint.”

Haki Arleon-- no, Haki Wisteria now, leans in the doorway, smile just as radiant as when all her billboards. “But they’re only kings.”

(“So when are we going to meet the lady of the hour?” Obi asks, tie already loose around his neck. His waistcoat’s still neat, pressed so it clings to the narrow curve of his torso, but his jacket’s well on the way out the door. It hardly makes sense; that’s what he wears usually, easy as breathing, but with two drinks in him it hangs limp on his shoulder, just asking to slide off them. “This mystery Mrs Wisteria.”

“Future Mrs Wisteria,” Mitsuhide corrects, tugging at his cuffs. “And you’re not strictly supposed to know that. This is just Ms Haruto’s retirement party.”

“Right, and her retirement plan is grandkids,” Obi huffs, scanning the ballroom. “So where is she? I want Miss to start murmuring to me about Punnett.”

“I would never.” Shirayuki wobbles on her heels-- too tall, but Kiki said that anything less than three inches would be informal in this crowd-- relaxing when Obi’s hand grips her elbow. “Besides, Punnett squares only work for Mendelian traits. Once you get into eye color there’s at least eight known alleles involved--”

Obi’s hand slides to her back, hot even through the silk of her dress. His eyes are the same, that molten honey they melts to when he’s been frequenting the open bar and-- and maybe it’s about time she quits her cosmopolitans too, if she only feels steady holding onto the hem of his waistcoat. “Save the pillow talk for the bedroom, Miss.” 

Her teeth snick shut. She can’t remember what she was about to say anyway.

“If you’re so interested in seeing her--” Zen jerks his chin over to the head table where Izana sits, Haruto radiant beside him, wearing an inoffensive smile-- “she’s already over there.”

Obi cranes his neck-- well, they all do, but he’s the least subtle about it, not even trying to cover his gawking. “It’s all just some old fogies your family does business with and-- no way.” His head swings back, eyes round as saucers. “Are you kidding me?”

Shirayuki squints, and the blonde head to his other side resolves into a pretty woman, her smile twice as bright and a hundred times more genuine. It’s her the men are flocking around tonight, but she hovers at Izana’s side, a hair’s breadth away from touching. “Oh, isn’t that the woman who was running the funding drives at Lilias? Ah, what was her name...?”

Gold eyes fix on her, no longer molten honey but hard flashes of coin. “Haki Arleon?”

Silly of her to forget; she shook her hand and everything. “Oh! Yes, that sounds right.”

Kiki shakes her head. “Only you, Shirayuki...”

“Wha--?”

“That’s Haki Arleon,” Zen tells her, as if Obi hadn’t said it already. “She’s--”

“The top of Maxim’s Hot 100,” Obi offers, followed by Mitsuhide’s stern, “Obi!”

Zen sighs. “She’s Hollywood royalty.”

“One of the most famous actresses of the last decade,” Kiki continues at her blank look. “She won an Oscar at sixteen...?”

“Oh.” She certainly looks magazine perfect now, every fold of her dress laying just right along the curves of her body, not a pinch of mascara out of place. “I don’t really watch movies.”)

That Haki Arleon is not the one that stands before her now. Though to be fair, she’s not the same Shirayuki Lyon she was then, either.

“You’re here.” America’s Sweetheart slumps across their spotless hardwood floor, flopping onto the sectional. “Finally. Save me.”

(”Is this where you ask me to sign an NDA?” The limo’s hardly pulled away from the curb, but Shirayuki’s temper is already boiling, rattling the top of the pot. “Do I need to sign an affidavit to say nothing happened between us? Should I send the Inquirer a note about how I no longer exist?”

Izana hums, his annoyance a dangerous buzz beneath his tongue. “There’s no need to be quite so melodramatic, doctor.”

“Isn’t there?” She rattles the tabloid in her hand, every word from her mouth so waspish it could sting. “This is your work, isn’t it? You’re the reason--”

He leans, one long-fingered hand plucking the paper out of her grasp. “There are reasons more innumerable than I can mention as to why the future folded out into this particular pattern, but if you are accusing me of holding the scissors to my brother’s apron strings in order to gt my way, I must gladly disappoint you.”

Her whole body aches from the rictus she holds it in. “What are you trying to say?”

“I’m saying that I did not ask you into this car to talk about my brother’s inability to properly navigate his love life,” Izana replies, sour, one leg crossing sulkily over the other. “I asked you here to offer you a proposition.”

She takes in one deep, steeling breath, then another. “You’ll have to excuse me if I’m not interested in any of your--”

“It is a professional proposition,” he informs her swiftly, nipping her complains in the bud. “I would like to hire you. For...in-house care.”

“Are you ill?” For how much rage had been rattling in her bones for the last half hour, it’s strange how quickly it evaporates in the face of her concern. “Does Zen know? No, is it your mother--?”

He raises a hand, quieting her. “No, not me, nor my mother, though I appreciate your concern. It’s...” Izana may have his reputation as a man who mountains find impassive, but for a moment she sees it, true fear flashing across his eyes. “...My wife.”)

There is no photoshop perfection as Shirayuki kneels in front of her, fingers pressed to the racing pace of her pulse. “Are you sleeping?”

“A little.” Haki squirms under her touch, her body angled as much away from her as she can manage. “Some. Barely.”

“But you’re tired?” She’s wan underneath her natural tan, the sort of stark white that says anemia. Already Shirayuki’s riffling through panels in her head, wishing she had a phlebotomy department at her fingertips. Then again, maybe she does; she’ll have to ask Izana just how much medical care will be magically available to her. “Have you been keeping anything down?”

“Hm...” She coughs, delicate. “Yes?”

Haki might win awards for her acting, but it will take a better liar than that to fool her by omission. “Have you been eating?”

America’s Sweetheart gives a very unphotogenic grimace.

“I had a yogurt.” Shirayuki sits back, waiting for the list, but it doesn’t come. Instead Haki just slips from her grip, palms pressing into the cushions as she strives for a casual lean. “And some of that tea you sent me. That stuff’s been great.”

“Oh, that’s just-- it’s ginger tea.” She sits back on the cassock, waving off her praise. “With some lemon and a few other things. Nothing special.”

“Miss is being too humble,” Obi rumbles from his corner, slinking out to perch on the sofa’s arm. “She stayed up all night making that stuff.”

“It’s important to get the proportions right,” Shirayuki informs him, prim. “Both for effectiveness, and preg-- er....”

Haki’s brows raise, and for a moment, she looks just like her cover on Vogue, arch and pleased. “Well, I see that cat’s out of the bag.”

“Ah...” She sheepishly rubbed at her cheek. “Izana did mention it...”

(”You understand nothing I tell you can leave this car, correct?” Even in his vulnerability, Izana is implacable; an unmovable edifice between her and his loved ones, as unnecessary as it is. “We had only just heard the heartbeat before this all started, and if word were to get out and we...she...”

For once, Izana Wisteria flounders, at a loss. “It’s rare for a fetus to fail after seven weeks,” she offers, biting back the actual number. Five percent only seems low to people already in the other percentile. “A miscarriage--”

“Can’t ever get out.” He huffs, agitated. “I am aware that you do not follow celebrity gossip avidly, but my wife...”

Shirayuki had always been under the impression this had been an arrangement, something forged from good business sense and perhaps a hint of mutual trust. They’d grown up together, after all-- at least that’s what Zen whispered in her ear at the wedding, watching them sweep across the floor. But now--

Now he falters again. “Every moment of her life has been for public consumption, even her grief. I won’t give them this.”

If it were anyone else, Shirayuki would lean forward. She’d put her hand over theirs, giving a comforting squeeze as she told them just what they needed to hear, the way they needed to hear it. It was her gift, after all, knowing how to tell both the best and worst of news.

But instead she looks at him, steel in her spine, and tells him, “You won’t have to.”)

“I take it the vomiting is still frequent, then?” Shirayuki takes in the dark circles around her eyes, the dull sheen of her skin. “Even though you’re not eating.”

She at least has the grace to look abashed, caught out like she is. “I am...it’s just better when I don’t.”

Her palms tap absently on her knees, fingers wishing they had a keyboard to key entries into while she thought. “We’ll have to go over your full medical history before I make any recommendations, but you need fluids-- plenty of them.”

“I drink--”

“No, I mean IVs,” Shirayuki clarifies with a shake of head. “We’ll have to call the hospital, see if--”

“No hospitals.” Haki stares back at her firmly, unmoving. “That’s how the tabloids find you.”

“Izana mentioned that too.” She sighs, rubbing at her forehead. “We don’t really like doing IVs out of the hospital without some support staff, but I might be able to get someone to come out...”

Haki waves her hand. “Oh, don’t worry. Just ask for what you need, and Izana can get the hospital to make it happen.”

Oh, how she’d love to be a fly on Garrack’s wall for that conversation. “We’ll see. Until then, let’s just make sure you’re comfortable.”

Twelve hours later, Obi closes the sedan door after Haki, making sure the bucket is appropriately situated in her lap. “Comfortable, huh?”

She sighs. “It was a nice thought. You can get her to the hospital--?”

“Well.” His teeth flash white under the lamps. “I certainly know the way.”

[epicspheal]

And here’s yet another one shot, inspired by a chat on discord Title: Cuddles Word Count:  1272 Pairing: Leon/Raihan Summary: It's been a long day for the Unbeatable Champion Leon, and his boyfriend Raihan wants to cuddle....

I hope you guys check it out you can read it on AO3 or if you would like it will be down under the “keep reading” link below

Leon burst through the door of his hotel room at the Rose of the Rondelands, absolutely exhausted. It was the night before the challenger’s cup was supposed to take place and Leon was tired from all of the pre tournament interviews…

“What do you think of this year's crop of challengers?”

“None of the challengers this year have been able to complete the circuit without defeat...do you think any of them have a chance against making it against the Galar leaders at full strength?”

“What do you think of the two trainers you endorsed? Your brother Hop and his best friend Calla...are you disappointed in their-”

Leon almost lost his cool with the reporter with that last one, almost. Over a decade of being in the limelight had of course forced him to watch his tone especially with the hounds that are the Galarian press, looking for the slightest gaff to rip him to shreds. Of course even the great unbeatable champion of Galar had his limits, and picking apart his brother and his best friend’s performance was one of them…

“Hey Leon” a voice rang out from the hotel room’s bed. A small tired smile grace the champion’s face as he looked up to see his boyfriend Raihan standing up “How’s it going champ?”

“Raihan,” Leon said before running to the taller man and throwing his arms around him. Raihan chuckled at that and put his arms securely around Leon, allowing the champion to lean his weight onto the dragon gym leader. Even though Raihan was leaner than Leon, he was nothing but lean muscle, able to carry the weight of the man nuzzling into chest. Raihan pressed a gentle forehead kiss to Leon’s forehead, a gesture that melted the reigning champion’s heart.

Raihan, the gym leader of Hammerlocke and the heir to the Hammerlocke throne. The one person the great champion of Galar turned to when he needed comfort.

“Rough day with interviews, eh” Raihan spoke after a bit.

“Was it that obvious?”

“To the public? Nah...but I could tell you were ready to throw hands with that reporter who mentioned Hop and Calla’s name” Raihan said his eyes sparkling with a mirth that said I would pay good money to see you throw hands with a member of the paparazzi

“I mean...you’re not wrong…” Leon said in between fits of laughter “Talk shit, get hit, especially when it comes to my bro and his best friend”

“Just let me know when you square up so I can live stream it, that will definitely be a popular video, probably even more than you doing the WAP Klik-Klok challenge with the Alolan champion” Raihan mused “anytime our wholesome Galarian champ does something risque it's an instant hit”

Oh that had been an interesting video at the champion’s conference the year before. Done on a whim, at the behest of the Alolan champion (“to help you and Raihan finally get together” she said). Rose giving him an earful about his reputation and Cynthia being upset that she wasn’t invited to do the WAP dance with them...

Leon felt his eyes grow heavier while resting on Raihan’s chest, listening to the powerful yet steady rhythm of his boyfriend’s heart. He really needed his rest. Leon carefully, almost reluctantly pulled himself out of Raihan’s embrace.

“I need to get ready for bed”

After washing up and putting on some comfy Charizard pajamas, Leon climbed into the bed next to Raihan who was currently scrolling through Pokegram. This made Leon smile. Yeah Raihan’s obsession with social media could be a little concerning at times (especially when Raihan wouldn’t let Leon eat their dinner until after he posted the perfect picture) but moments like this where Raihan was lying on their shared bed, content watching a video from a nursery of baby Goomy playing around well…

Leon leaned over to give Raihan a loving peck on the cheek…

“Goodnight Rai” he said before moving under the silk sheets of the king sized bed. Leon suddenly felt a shift in the bed and he looked to see the teal eyes staring down at him

“Rai?”

“Lee, I want to cuddle tonight” Raihan said with just a hint of a whine to his voice “...it’s been so long…”

Leon’s heart sank. It’s true, the current season has been much busier than previous ones. Leon had been forced to travel all over Galar more than usual to protect the citizens from the rogue dynamaxing Pokemon. And Rose seemed to be more on edge than ever before...constantly dragging him to meetings, constantly pulling him aside to talk about the future of Galar.

It was exhausting, Leon was worn ragged.

And this was the first time in weeks that Raihan and Leon could actually spend the night with each other but...

“I-I’m sorry Raihan, but I can’t...not tonight.” Leon said resigned “I have another early start...more early morning pressers before the gym challengers face off against each other”

Raihan huffed but nodded sadly. One of the many great things about dating Raihan, he understood what it was like to be in the harsh spotlight that is the Galarian League. Leon knew he’d be disappointed but that he would understand.

“Alright” Raihan sighed as he laid his head back on the pillow, turning away from Leon sadly “but after this is over and I finally take that crown away from you, my first order of business as champion is cuddling with you”

“That’s if you can actually knock out my Charizard first love” Leon mocked playfully “Good night my prince”

“Don’t use my title in bed Lee...so unsexy”

With that the two drifted off to sleep...well they tried to anyways. Sleep was alluding both star trainers. This gym challenge had been so off, and there was a growing sense of dread between the two about the rogue dynamaxed Pokemon.

But more so than anything...Leon and Raihan wanted each other. Just themselves, without the weight of the champion crown for Leon or the being the heir to one of the four great galarian houses for Raihan. Not the self-assured, fierce, borderline cocky personas that the public loved when watching the two on the pitch. The Leon and Raihan that bonded over astronomy and watching the stars in the wild area as kids while Nessa and Sonia bonded over books at their four person camps. The Raihan who was fascinated upon seeing Leon’s family farm for the first time. The Leon who got lost in Raihan’s family castle and ended up in the catacombs. The Raihan and Leon who made their one shared science class in college the most memorable semester for their professor due to their...interesting takes on the experiments.

They needed some time for themselves, some intimacy...and just lying together in the same bed wasn’t enough...not right now.

Raihan was shocked when he felt the shift of the bed before feeling Leon’s strong arms wrap around him, bringing his taller frame closer to his body. Somehow, Leon had maneuvered himself so that Raihan’s head would rest on Leon’s famed chest.

“Oh so now we’re cuddling?” Raihan asked, pretending to be offended but his heart was leaping for joy Leon said nothing but planted another kiss, this time into the locs of Raihan’s hair. Raihan grinned as he leaned into Leon’s strong embrace. Contrary to what many fans would assume...Raihan enjoyed being the little spoon.

And so the champion of galar and his greatest rival, lover and friend, were finally able to sleep, entangled in each other’s loving embrace.

[princessmadafu]

37 bleedin’ pages!

I have condensed them for you and left out most of the bits that the nasty evil British Press have already covered. Feel free to skip any boring bits.

Dax Shepard: Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Expert's Experts on Expert. I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Monica Mouse.

Monica Padman: Hi.

[...]

There follows some heavy marketing of towels and stuff...

DS: Now please enjoy Prince Harry. We are supported by Brookelinen. My favourite hotel quality sheets to get into and writhe around in the nude. [...] They're impeccable. They're decadent, they're soft, they're absorbent. Brookelinen was started to create beautiful high quality home essentials that don't cost an arm and a leg. They're so confident in their product, they come with a 365 day warranty. So give yourself that comfort refresh you deserve and get it for less. Go to Brookelinen.com and use promo code 'expert' to get $20 off with a minimum purchase of $100. That's Brookelinen.com and enter promo code 'expert' for $20 off with a minimum purchase of $100. That's Brookelinen.com, promo code 'expert'.

Pretty ironic really, as Harry wades into fake news and how advertising algorithms are ruining us...

DS:...It's like the algorithms on the internet. You can't compete with that, a human.

PH: You can't if you have the awareness of what it's doing to you. And the fact that it's learning, which is scary. And advertising has been going on for hundreds of years, but done really responsibly. The difference here is targeted ads. If ads have always worked for companies, you can put on the TV, you can walk away, you can come back, your involvement is switching on switching off or changing the channel. Whereas now with algorithms is there, it's just feeding your habits. And it's also reading through your emails and everything else. So it's getting to know you, like, it gets to know the decisions you're gonna make before you make them, then it creates this echo chamber of no pushback, of no context of nothing. It's just perpetuating and feeding the bias and the habits that you already have inside of you, which is terrible.[...]

Harry needs to learn about AdBlock and Ghostery and VPNs and Tor and DuckDuckGo and Smartpage and all the other clever little ways the computer-literate have of ridding their lives of unwanted advertising. I haven't seen an ad in years. The only person feeding my habits is me. It’s called personal responsibility. Maybe Harry still needs a Nanny but most grown-ups don’t. Oh wait, I forgot, the “Meghan&Harry Show” fans are all kids.

PH: [...] It's a computer. It's like, who wrote the algorithms? You guys did? Probably all male and all white.

Oooh, let's be sexist and racist, Harry! Did you ever hear of these women or are they too scary?

https://biztechmagazine.com/article/2012/05/mothers-technology-10-women-who-invented-and-innovated-tech

Then they discuss Naked Vegas (this guy Dax has a thing about nudity) and Harry in Afghanistan. And discuss a calendar of naked men that DS and MP put together - their favourite male bodies. What a good job it's only gloating over naked male bodies and not naked female bodies. It's apparently acceptable, for some reason. Harry doesn't know who the guys are.

DS: Monica makes this for me every year and it's a calendar of all my favourite bodies of friends.

MP: And they're all men.

DS: They're all men.

MP: And they're all gorgeous bodies.

[...]

And is Harry nervous talking about mental health? He shouldn't be, he's been banging on about it for years.

PH: Yeah. Was I nervous? No. Not so much nervous. But I guess on this particular subject around mental health. Yeah. For me, it's always a, unfortunately, today's world is quite a sensitive subject, not just for the people who are sharing. But ultimately, the subject matter itself has to be handled with care. [...] It ends up getting weaponized by certain people.

Weaponised by certain people? Like him and Markle, for instance. Neither of 'em has any talent so they weaponise their mental health. Big big mental health bombs loaded with word salad to lob at their own families and cause huge distress. Not nice, Harry.

PH: That's how I've always felt when it comes to projection. I mean, hatred is a form of projection, right? [...] We're not born to hate people. So it manifests itself over a period of time. And of course, it can come from unresolved pain, or being hurt continually, as a young kid or through adult life. But ultimately, there's a source to it. There's a reason why you want to hate somebody else.

Like his dad, his brother...

PH: And actually have some compassion for them. Which is really hard when you're on the receiving end of this, like, just vile, toxic abuse. But the reality is, is you say, flip it. [...] Every single one of us wherever we are, wherever we come from, there will always try and find some way to be able to mask the actual feeling and be able to try and make us feel different to how we are actually feeling, perhaps having a feeling. Right, because so many people are just numb to it. That was a huge part of the beginning of my life, which was like, I rejected. I said, there's nothing wrong with me. I'm fine.

And now he's moved on to promoting his new mental health stuff with Oprah, The Me You Can't See...

PH: So if you are making that conscious decision to say: You know what, it's not self serving, but I want to share my story. I'm being asked to share my story to hopefully help someone or loads of other people. I'm probably going to get trolled. I'm probably going to get attacked by the same people that were doing anyway. If I'm willing to make that decision, surely that comes from a place of courage rather than weakness?

Or possibly naivety. Harry is only wanted for his money-making title and royal status; he has no mental health qualifications, he's not a mental health professional, he's not an expert, all he brings to the table is the glamour of being a prince of the BRF. Which he quite clearly hates. Markle is lining her pockets from their self-indulgent mental health whinge fest and he's too dim to see it. There follows the bit about the spectrum of upbringing that the press is covering nicely so I can skip the next few pages - the bits where Harry says he doesn't see that talking about his own issues is complaining, and “it's the job, right”, how he never wanted the job of being royal, and his therapy and how “massively self-critical” he is (yet still can't see that he's not being honest with himself), ooh and sharing his hatred of the British press - that's a good bit, let's skip to page 18:

PH I think the biggest issue for me was that being born into it, you inherit the risk, you inherit the risk that comes with it, you inherit every element of it without choice. And because of the way that the UK media are, they feel an ownership over you. Literally like a full on ownership. And then they give the impression to some of their, well, most of the readers, that that is the case. But I think it's a really dangerous place to be if you don't have a choice, but then, of course, then people quite rightly will turn around and go. So what if you didn't have a choice? It was privilege? [...] Page Six of the New York Post, they took pictures of my son being picked up from school on his first day [...] But I guess my point is the way that I look at it, especially now living here one hour outside LA. Like it's a feeding frenzy here. We spent the first three and a half months living at Tyler Perry's house. You let us stay. And the helicopter helicopters, the drones the paparazzi cutting the fence like it was madness. And people out there -Their response was, Well, what do you expect if you live in LA? It's like, Okay, well, first of all, we didn't mean to live in LA. This is like a staging area before we try and find a house. And secondly, how sad that if you live in LA and you're well known figure, you just have to accept it. The first security we had, I said, Well, where's the safest place? Inside. Just because I'm a well known person, you can't go outside anymore. [...] it's really, really sad. And of course, their argument is - the paparazzi and everybody else - is like all if you're in the public space, then it's absolutely fine for us to do it. So what is our human right as an individual and as a family, you're saying that if the moment we step foot out of our house, that it's open season and free game? What? Because of public interest?. There's no public interest in you taking your kids for a walk down the beach. Nothing...

And on and on it goes... He should've stayed in the UK then. The Cambridges are managing very nicely, thank you. They take their kids for walks on the beach, and we'd never seen them until they released their anniversary video the other week. Harry's clearly envious of William; Harry's mad wife is vitriolically envious of Catherine. Oh and I’m pretty sure it’s the mad wife who keeps phoning her go-to paps when she needs to be in the news again.

PH: [...] I believe we live in an age now where you've got certain elements of the media redefining to us what privacy means. There's a massive conflict of interest. And then you've got social media platforms, trying to redefine what free speech means. Why - I wonder why you're doing that. And again - so this has been happening for 15 years now. And we're living in this world where we've almost like all the laws have been completely flipped by the very people that need them flipped so they can make more money and they can capitalise off our pain, grief, and this sort of general self destructive mode that's happening at the moment [...]

He doesn't get how hypocritical this is, does he? The Markles are the ones capitalising on their grief, pain and the rest of it. And no-one would be interested in them without the royal bits because they have nothing else to offer. Failed actress and used-to-be-a-soldier wrapped up in festering bitterness.

Blah, blah... went shopping in a supermarket... saw lots of chewing gum... blah, blah... Archie on the back of his bicycle... girls want to be princesses... You don't need to be a princess, you can create the life that will be better than any princess or it's something along those lines... she said she expected [the press] to be fair... Pages and pages of how he hates the British press...

PH: [...] And especially when you can't defend yourself so yes, I think when you marry into it, especially when it's one Princess Diana's sons there is a certain amount of 'okay what I'm actually letting myself in for?' But very few people actually know - apart from the Brits - how toxic that element of the of the UK press is.[...]

We're up to page 24 now, if you're still with me. Oh here it is, Harry's unconscious bias... What’s the betting the mad wife has scripted this bit for him?

PH: [...] So going back to the whole sort of travelling around the Commonwealth, I thought I knew, right, having been able to travel that much and meet so many and such a diverse group of people. I thought I understood life. Especially bearing in mind most of the countries I was going to were, most of the communities are going to were people of colour. But then I was really shocked once I started doing therapy. And that bubble was burst. And I started doing my own work, really - a lot of work - and started to uncover and understand more about unconscious bias. And I was like, wow, I thought since I screwed up when I was younger, and then did the work. I thought I then knew. But I didn't. And I still don't fully know. It's like a constant working progress. And every single one of us has it. [...] Everyone has biases, of all sorts. But I think it's a really important point, especially now, after everything's happened in the last year and a half, like the world is changing, the younger generation are driving it. And you've got to like a multi-racial, cultural sort of movement happening, which has never happened before. But unconscious bias is the way that I understand it, is, again, it's not something that's wrong with you. Right? And you don't have to be defensive about it. That's the thing. No one's blaming you. But the moment that you acknowledge that you do have unconscious bias, what are you going to do about it? Because if you choose to do nothing you're continuing to fuel the problem, which means that you're then heading towards racism. Whereas unconscious bias is actually something that is inherent, unfortunately, in every single one of us. But that it is possible to educate yourself to be more aware of the problems and therefore be part of the solution rather than part of the problem.

Markle's got him well-trained on this one, hasn't she. I wonder if he's read anything critical of the unconscious bias movement, or just repeating what he's been told to. Oh and then he goes off about being in the army...

PH: I loved it. I love wearing the same uniform as everybody else. I love being treated the same. I love the expectation of if you want to get that job, or you want that promotion, or you want to finish this race, it's all on you. There's no special treatment, you're not going to get any help. If anything, you're probably going to get treated the opposite because everyone thinks that you've had an easy life. And everyone's always helped you get to where you are.

But...but...but, Harry wasn't treated the same, there was special treatment, he was helped to get to where he was. He scraped a couple of poor quality A Levels and got admitted to Sandhurst because he's a prince. Good old Wikipedia says:

In June 2003, Harry completed his education at Eton with two A-Levels,[22] achieving a grade B in art and D in geography, having decided to drop history of art after AS level.[23] He has been described as "a top tier athlete", having played competitive polo and rugby union.[24] One of Harry's former teachers, Sarah Forsyth, has asserted that Harry was a "weak student" and that staff at Eton conspired to help him cheat on examinations.[25][26] Both Eton and Harry denied the claims.[25][27] While a tribunal made no ruling on the cheating claim, it "accepted the prince had received help in preparing his A-level 'expressive' project, which he needed to pass to secure his place at Sandhurst."[25][28]

PH: And then suddenly, like - while I was at school, I hated exams. And I promised myself I'd never do exams again. Then I joined the army of which is full of exams. I still promised myself I'm never gonna do it and then I end up flying Apache [...]

Gods, it's getting boring. Even the interviewers are zoning out. Still ten pages to go. Wish I hadn't started this, I could be out weeding. Weather's nice, not too windy... Do I deserve a quick G&T yet?

PH: Or worse, was they turn around and say, right, because last week, you're out the front. This week, you got to carry his bergan, I'm like - what, 30 extra pounds? Nooo. But it was, it was the most normalising experience or job that I could have ever hoped for. And then going to Afghanistan twice [...] And someone said to me very recently, from the moment that you're born into today's world, life is trauma, so the sooner that we actually acknowledge that but but [...]

A-a-a-a-and he's back on the mental health thing, PTSD or PTSI,

PH: Post Traumatic Stress Injury is like: Well, that makes sense, because I just saw my mate get blown out. But the other piece of this is, what we need to remember is, the lot of the recruiting that we do in the UK, comes from certain cities and certain homes, where there's childhood trauma. So what we collectively have already got inside of us, the trigger of seeing something happen in Iraq, Afghanistan can be the trigger. So everyone goes: Oh, it's because they were on operations, and because they saw their makeup blown up. It's like, no. [...] So that's what I've been working on for years, for the last five years, which is like, and it started in therapy of like, I don't want to lose this thing, because I think it's, I feel so connected to my mum. [...]

They move on to parenting, which the press is rubbing its hands over... Harry blaming everyone but himself and his saintly mother - Charles, HMTQ, PP... "They f*ck you up, your mum and dad". But not the mum bit. He can't push his mum off her pedestal.

https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/48419/this-be-the-verse if you don't know Larkin's poetry. How much more? Nearly there. Monica loves The Crown and doesn't realise it's fictitious.

DS: [...]Well, Harry, I've really really liked talking to you. You're very charming. You're very intelligent. You're handsome, and I can't wait to see your torso.

MP: Thank you so much for coming.

DS: So I just want to remind everyone that May 21 on Apple Plus, you should check out Oprah and Prince Harry's 'The Me You Can't See'. I have to imagine it's similar to her book, which I just read, which is absolutely incredible 'What happened to you?' So everyone should check out 'The me you can't see' on Apple plus May 21.

And still Harry won't shut up... Shut up, shut up. Cut his mic. You don't have to read this last bit, they've already wound up the interview...He still won’t shut up.

PH: Yeah, we're moving from the physical to the emotional, right, physically. At the beginning of this pandemic, people were panicking. And there was that fight or flight like, ahh what do we do like lockdown, survival? Yeah. And now that the vaccines have been sort of, we're getting to the point where more and more people are being vaccinated, we're now in the emotional phase of what I read in the New York Times article was called languishing, which is really interesting. It's like the is the middle child between flourishing and depression. You just feel flat, and it's not depressed. It's definitely not flourishing. You lack the energy and the will, the motivation, all that kind of stuff. Because you're kind of sitting there going - Well, what happens next? And I think it's really important that we talk about languishing. And it was coined by someone I can't remember who but I think it was the journalist who wrote the story was Adam Grant. No, he didn't come up with it. Someone else came up with him, he wrote this, the most amazing article about languishing and the fact that how important it is to be able to talk about it because - look when it comes to mental health, we need to realise and accept that every single one of us have mental health. There's varying degrees, as we said, you've got the mental illness, and then you've got the sort of the awareness and the work that you can put in, like, Where do you want to be that we shouldn't just sit there and go: Oh, mental illness is once we are literally on the floor crawling around in the foetal position needing help. But for me, I don't think I need therapy anymore. But I wanted. And when I say therapy, I mean, actual therapy, sitting down having a discussion with someone. But I also mean like, nature, like going for walks, like throwing the ball for my dog down the beach and stuff like that. There are certain things around the world that are free, some you have to pay for, but ultimately go searching for the things that make you feel good about yourself. Like that's the key to life, get rid of the bad stuff, get rid of the hate, and just focus on the good. And your whole life turns around from that. I hate this idea. And I was one of them. I fell for it. Right? I didn't acknowledge that clearly what happened to me when I was 12 years old, losing my mom and all the other pieces that happened, the traumatic experiences that happened to me since then, I didn't acknowledge them, when perhaps - maybe I need to deal with this because if I don't, how the hell am I going to be a decent father to my son and my daughter? Like that awareness, I didn't have then. But again, we've got what - 40 experts as part of this series, and the Surgeon General, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, she's absolutely fantastic. And she was talking about this concept of mental health being sort of public health, right. Because the services are so limited. There's not enough money. The problem is actually immense. How can we all help each other rather than this: 'Oh, once I'm broken, or once I'm suffering, I have to go here.' And there's not enough rooms or spaces for the amount of people or the for the need, when actually you can get ahead of it, and work on the prevention by sharing and being more vulnerable with each other, and being able to process this grief or this loss, or this trauma that every single one of us have experienced and will experience. So anyone who's sitting there going: 'I don't have a problem, and I never will have a problem.' Well, you probably are already contributing to the problem, because you probably got your blinkers on, you probably created your own echo chambers. So I think it's a that, that's certainly what I've experienced for my own process, my own journey, my family and my friends and everybody else is. Anyone who thinks, oh, we're fine. You're the one who's like, willing to talk about it. It's like, yeah, I'm willing to talk about it and talking about it. And the financial element as well. We're pouring money into on the downsteam, when it's like, Can we just focus upstream? Yeah, we focus on one thing, like to me listen to Oprah was what was one of the reasons that this whole thing started was two of the biggest issues that we're facing in today's world, I think, is the climate crisis, and mental health. And they're both intrinsically linked. Basically if we neglect our collective wellbeing, then we're screwed. Basically, because we can't look after ourselves. We can't look after each other. We can't look after each other, we can't look after this home that we all inhabit. So it's all part of the same thing.

DS: Prince Harry, I don't say this lightly. I love you. Thanks for coming. This was great.

M: Thank you so much.

PH: Thank you very much.

Wish I'd done my weeding.

[mcwriting]

Starstruck (6)

IT’S FINALLY HERE! After revision after revision, I’m done with ch 6! Thank you to everyone who has been soooo patient with me! I’ve finally found a groove with this story and am super motivated to finish. I promise the next chapters will actually include more of Tom and get us into the story resolve!

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9

Fandom: Tom Holland 

Ship: Tom Holland x Reader

Setting: LA area

Word Count: 1863

Warnings: some “bad” words as usual

Rating: Meh. K+

                            __________________________________

Days later you finally drove yourself to dance, even though it was only a short walk from home

It was a necessary evil to avoid the paps trying to harass you.

The studio would be full today, but you couldn’t keep skipping class. You talked to your instructor privately to ask that she help keep the class from getting “distracted” by your situation.

You were there pretty early and entered the large room to pick a spot on the barre and start warming up. As the time for class neared, students trickled in.

Some of your friends came to give a hug and say they were happy to see you, but the others just wanted to grill you. You ignored them and stayed silent, exchanging awkward looks with your closer friends. 

Class went somewhat smoothly, if you forgot every time someone tried to pull you aside during a water break to squeeze info out of you. 

By the end, you were tired and drained and ready to go home.

It wasn’t until you’d already begun to step out the door that someone tried to warn you about the paparazzi and journalists outside. 

You were immediately overwhelmed by people rushing forward, shouting out questions and statements. Shocked, you stood completely still as cameras snapped and microphones were shoved in your face. 

Obviously, someone had told them you were here, and unfortunately you knew they would be able to follow you home. 

Parents, teachers, and classmates kindly came to your aid, surrounding you to help push through the crowd to your car. 

You dreaded walking towards it and willingly giving away what your vehicle looked like to them because if they happened to capture your license plate number (which was very plausible) they could find you easily. 

As the people supporting you tried moving you forward, you finally sucked up your fears and stepped with them, head held high. You wouldn’t let yourself get caught looking dejected over a stupid, selfish celebrity.

It took a while to drive out of the lot because you had to avoid the sea of people. It wouldn’t look great for you to hospitalize a reporter because you ran over them.

Even if it was their fault for stepping in front of me? you asked yourself.

YES

Cars were tailgating you, as some of the people had been smart enough to hop in their cars when you did so they could follow you home. A sense of panic tightened your chest when you realized how dangerous this might be.

You wanted to call the cops but figured nothing could stop these story-hungry maniacs from trying to dig up the smallest speck of dirt on you right now and running to the police would make you look weak. 

Surely this media storm would end as soon as Kendall Jenner did another Pepsi ad or some rapper got arrested outside the US, right?

Wrong, of course.

Two days later, the tea was that Tom was going from LA to Seoul, and he had been bombarded at LAX with fans and journalists, while others still followed your every move, even going so far as to watching your parents go to work and back. 

Tom had pulled the same stunts as you, practically bending over backwards to avoid answering the difficult questions of what had happened. You had to give it to him, he knew what he was doing, but you couldn’t help but feel a fire in your body every time you caught a glimpse of his management team in the background of pictures. 

It had been so tiring being silent about the matter that you felt like you were bursting at the seams, and you did the only logical thing you could think of:

Pack a backpack and drive straight to b/f/n’s house. 

The only warning you gave was a text saying I’m ready, and I hope you are too. 

She responded with the okay hand emoji and you took that as the “good enough” signal to head over.

                             __________________________________

You knew people had followed you to her house and you would have to apologize for that later, but now you were on the doorstep, nervous to knock. 

Before you could reach your hand up, however, the door swung open. 

Standing before you was your best friend in the flesh for the first time in the longest week of your life. 

She looked at you seriously and then glanced behind you, raising an eyebrow. A small grin crept up your face.

“Sorry about them. They don’t really understand when to leave,” you blurted.

She looked you up and down for a moment, calculating a reply before a smile rose to her own lips. 

“Come on, let’s get you inside before they invite themselves in too.”

She shut the door behind you and locked it, and as soon as she turned around you both embraced in a long, much needed hug. You teared up 

You were still holding each other when a male voice called out. 

“Is that y/n?” her dad asked from the couch. 

You pulled away and sniffled. 

“In the flesh!” you called. 

“Come on, let’s go talk in my room,” b/f/n said, pulling you that way. You waved at her dad and sister as you passed the living room.

Boy did it feel good to be in that house again.

                             __________________________________

Both of you sat on the floor, backs leaned against the bed, sharing a bowl of chips.

You finished summarizing what had happened from the day you went to the premiere until Tom left the city and you were waiting for her to respond. She had been silently listening the whole time, and now you were silent in your wait, except for the occasional crunch of chips.

It had been a few minutes when she finally turned to you.

“Y/n… why didn’t you tell me?”

Your stomach dropped. Of course she would ask you that. You sighed and leaned your head back.

“I know it was wrong, and I’m sorry for that but, b/f/n, I was scared. I know how much you love Tom and I didn’t want anything to go public… even though that ended up failing. I never wanted to be in the public eye and I was afraid that if I told you, you might accidentally let it slip on twitter or insta.”

“You didn’t think you could trust me?” she accused, rightfully. You turned your head to look her in the eyes.

“It’s not that you aren’t trustworthy, I mean, you’re my best friend, I tell you everything. The problem is that this was the biggest secret… ever. No one could know, not even you. The only people who knew the extent of what happened were me and Tom. I don’t think he even told his brothers or best friend everything.” 

You both sat quietly again, studying each other’s faces.

“So when I came over last week? You lied to me about the car picture?”

You cringed a little, but had to tell the truth.

“Yes. You had just missed him leaving the house, too. That was the morning after he stayed the night.”

“WHAT!” she exclaimed. “You’re telling me I could have met him for real and you’re just telling me now??”

You couldn’t help but let out a laugh.

“I guess if I would’ve just let you meet him I could’ve prevented this whole situation, huh?” you joked.

“Honestly, yeah,” she replied with a smile.

“I’m really sorry that I lied to you and hid all of this.” 

B/f/n sighed this time.

“I know I should be mad, but I weirdly understand. If I’m being honest with myself, I probably would have done the same thing. Let’s just promise to be real with each other from now on.”

“Yeah, I like that idea.”

You both leaned over in a hug.

“So, since I need to know everything… where did Tom sleep that night, and are you the reason he liked my post.”

You pulled away.

“First of all, rude that you would ask me about that in my time of need,” you joked, “and secondly, yes I told him to like your post. I told him allllllll about you. Also... we both may have fallen asleep on my bed.”

“YOU SLEPT WITH TOM HOLLAND??” she basically screamed.

You started giggling as you slapped a hand over her mouth.

“Shhhhh! If you aren’t careful there’ll be even worse rumors about me!”

You both spent the night recounting your night with Tom and the other times spent with him, only leaving the room for dinner and more snacks. After your time apart, it was like you were attached at the hips.

For the first time in what seemed like forever, you finally slept soundly, not tossing and turning with the anxiety of days past.

                             __________________________________

You sat at the dining table with b/f/n, laughing like things were completely normal again. 

“Hey I’m gonna grab some more juice, want anything?” you asked, standing up.

B/f/n shook her head and you headed out of the room, beelining it to the fridge. 

In the kitchen stood b/f/n’s older sister, Caroline, who was serving herself some pancakes as you pulled the juice bottle out.

“So… Crazy week I presume?” Caroline questioned.

“Like nothing you could imagine,” you replied.

Caroline was only a couple years older than you and b/f/n, but she had been a confidant for you many times when it came to things like relationships or just more mature topics. She also was getting her PhD in psychology, which came in handy for advice and discernment about different situations.

“Yeah, I’m sure. So do you actually hate him or are you secretly in love with him now?” she deadpanned, causing you to almost spill the juice.

“What?” you asked back, flabbergasted.

What kind of question was that? Was this girl out of her mind?

“Oh come on. It’s like the biggest fanfiction cliche of all time, ‘enemies to lovers’? Don’t think that we didn’t all notice that he had been crying in that live. Also you blushed when I said it.”

“Well obviously any normal person is gonna blush when someone says something embarrassing about them!”

“What does he smell like?” she interjected, and this time you were completely taken aback.

“I- WHAT? How is that relevant?”

“Answer the question, y/n.”

“Fine. He wears this Calvin Klein cologne. Hah, my whole room smelled like it for almost a week... Now tell me why that’s relevant.”

“Your eyes lit up and you smiled when you mentioned your room smelling like him. And you blushed again.”

Do I really? you thought. Sure he’s good looking and we had a great time together, but he was such a dick. He broke my heart and ruined my life. How could I like the guy that did that to me?

“I hate psychology.” you eventually replied, earning a laugh from Caroline. 

I’m gonna have to do some more thinking on this later you admitted to yourself, carrying your beverage back to the dining room.

                            __________________________________

Part 7 is done and hopefully coming soon. It’s looking like this is gonna be a 9 or 10 parter. Love you all!

Taglist: @marvel-lously, @jackiehollanderr, @one-big-fangirl, @dreamyvans, @lisannehus, @honeymoonpeter, @shootingstarsaretearsofheaven, @chenellearose 

[burnedbyshoto]

Welcome Home - Part Four

todoroki shouto x mom!reader

warnings: vomit tw, fluff

word count: 3,062

a/n: so we back and better than evah with domestics for shouto and kaito!!!!! got some requests to do this, and finally after having this done since like august. its finally posted!!!!!! enjoy anons!!!! also can totally be read as a stand alone, but ill link the other parts too.

Part One  Part Two  Part Three

It was safe to say you were in pain.

It was currently week twenty of your second pregnancy. To say the least you are always exhausted, in pain, hormonal, sad, angry, elated, and swollen. Even at week twenty, you were not at all showing. It had helped you continue to be an active Pro-Hero until week fifteen. It was now nearing the holidays. Statistic speaking most villain activity spiked around that time. So when you almost fainted on the job, Shouto forced you into maternity leave.

With Kaito still being four and requiring you to be around, you couldn’t go back and teach at U.A.! So you were able to stay at home restless, unattended to, and alone. 

You were now in your second trimester of pregnancy and you still had yet to tell Kaito. Hell! You still hadn’t seen the doctor outside of the pregnancy confirmation! As of lately, the paparazzi were interfering with your personal lives. You weren’t public with this pregnancy secret yet.

To be rather honest, it scared you to tell Kaito. The absolute thought of telling your sweet baby boy made you too nervous. It was to the point you were shivering and sweating thinking about it. You weren’t sure how he was going to react to this news. He would be turning five in a few weeks too. The night you had told Shouto you are pregnant again you promised something. You promised Shouto that the two of you would break the news before his birthday. But your fears were getting to you.

The last thing you wanted was for Kaito to feel that you were going to abandon him! He had bawled so much on the first day of preschool because he thought you and Shouto were leaving him! Yes, he is older than that first day of school, but he was still a mama’s boy! Even at five, Kaito demanded and loved the attention he got from the both of you! Babies were time and energy-consuming. Kaito already had less time with both of you working. Even with the above-average energy and stamina you and Shouto had, you were sure tire every day. 

So there you sat at home. You were crying as you thought about your redheaded baby as you tried cleaning. The other sound besides your sobs was the TV. You were currently watching a LIVE interview with Pro-Hero Shouto. 

Shouto was out on another island of Japan right now. He was finishing a national tour that his PR team made him go on. Given that your pregnancy was still unknown he agreed, as you two said no one could know until Kaito knew. But as you scrubbed the living room table, you wailed looking at Shouto. Your husband was looking way too attractive with his newest hero costume. On top of everything, this pregnancy was making you horny. And you couldn’t even do anything about it without Shouto there! Well, you could, but you ached so much! Most nights you almost always fell asleep the moment when your head hit the pillows. At least when Shouto wasn’t home that's what happened. Stupid baby hormones. 

You turned your attention back to the TV screen. The interview so far had been about a recent villain attack Shouto had put down in world-record speeds. Shouto had captured twenty villains in two seconds because they froze when they saw him. None of which having an effective quirk to counter the ice trapping their bodies. After a commercial break, and a promise of learning more about the personal life of Shouto, they were back! You were curious about what was going to happen. Shouto, after all, was still missing a few situational cues even at the age of twenty-eight.

“So, Shouto!” The TV hostess chirped, pushing the wisps of her hair that fell out of her bun out of her face. “You and another amazing Pro-Hero: Y/h/n make a fantastic duo out there fighting villains! You two have amazing chemistry out on the field.”

You couldn’t help the laughs that escape your lips at that statement. Oh, if only Pro-Hero Shouto was the same as Provisional Licensed Shouto in dealing with the media. He would have been so confused with that statement. You watched Shouto’s composed face melt from his media face into one you recognize as one he uses when you talk to him. “Yes, Y/h/n is, in fact, a wonderful hero, and she is amazing to work with no matter the task.”

“I bet it helps she’s your wife, too, huh?” The hostess blushes as she giggles and shouts of approval and joy echo with the live audience.

Shouto chuckles as he nods his head, “It does help, yes.”

You can’t help but roll your eyes. You and Shouto were one of the first top-ranked Pro-Heroes to get married. The both of you had been the Number One Hero at some point within your so far ten-year career. It also seemed that no matter how many years of marriage went by. Or how many times the media mentioned it, everyone still giggled about your romance. As if you both were in denial. 

“And of course, your beautiful baby, Kaito-kun!”

The screen behind them presents the single photo you and Shouto had shared of Kaito. It was the first day of school for him. Kaito was wearing the navy blue uniform of the school. The shorts ironed, crisped, and clean. The white-collar of his shirt peaked out over the blue blazer of his school. The crest printed over the right pocket. Kaito’s blazing red hair had a styled back into a 'comb-over'. It was fancy for school! But Kaito had insisted he wanted it stylized “like papa” as it was Shouto’s go-to for any fancy event.

Kaito's smile was large and wide. His eyes squinted because of the large grin. Despite the amount of excitement and enthusiasm in the picture, he clutched onto your leg. You remembered the tight grip he had on you. Because while he loved taking pictures, he was nervous about starting pre-school. You had been wearing a nice, modest outfit of yours in celebration of his new year. Stylized and with makeup on. You had a hand on Kaito, while the other held onto Shouto. A smile on your face.

Shouto was also dressed up in a navy blue suit. Kaito begged him to wear it in case he was the only one in a navy blue uniform. 

Kaito didn’t quite understand that everyone was going to be wearing the same uniform. Still, Shouto had dressed up the way Kaito demanded to ease his anxiety. Kaito believed no one could make fun of him if the Pro-Hero Shouto–his papa–dressed up that way! Shouto’s hair styled exactly like Kaito, and a gentle smile on his face. His arm wrapped around you as well. His other hand resting on top of your hand resting on top of Kaito’s shoulder.

Of course, after the photo was taken, you and Shouto walked Kaito to the classroom. Kaito bawled for quite a long time, and you cried with him too. Shouto had to hug you that entire morning because you had been so sad. When you and Shouto went to pick him up later that day Kaito was ecstatic to tell you about his day. Many of his classmates were in awe over who his parents were and so it helped him to create friends.

“What a beautiful family, I'm serious. I’m jealous!” The hostess sighed as there was another round of vocal agreement from the crowd. 

“Yeah, Kaito and Y/n make me happier,” Shouto says softly as he continues looking at the photo of the three of you. “They are my world.”

The audience and you make an awing noise, but your tears crack your voice.

“Speaking of family,” The hostess slyly states, a cunning twinkle in her eye. “Can you give us any insight on why Y/h/n retired from the scene for a while? Don’t think we haven’t noticed her not appearing with you for the past few weeks!”

Shouto chuckles as he shifts in his seat, “Is she pregnant again?” The hostess questions, and your heart rate increases, and as Shouto’s mouth opens to lie, your alarm goes off. Cursing under your breath, you run to your phone, it was time to pick up Kaito from school.

“Mama! GueSS WHAT!” Kaito shrieked as he threw himself into your arms, and you groaned as his knee hit up against your sore stomach. 

“Let me see, did your best friend finally get his quirk?”

“Well, he did it’s super cool, he can make food appear whenever he wants! I had so many chicken nuggets!” Kaito exclaims as you press a kiss to his temple, his once styled hair resembled close to a rats nest on his head. Oh, those Todoroki men just could never keep their hair tidy. “But that’s not it, silly mama!”

You hummed in thought. Kaito's waiting for your response as he waves goodbye to his fellow friends and strangers. “Did you find your missing sock? The one you weren’t wearing when I came to pick you up yesterday?” You asked tickling Kaito’s stomach.

“Well… I lied, I well... I accidentally burned it when I was showing off my quirk to my friend.” Kaito meekly stated and you laughed, he had already told you that yesterday. It seemed that he had already forgotten.

“Okay, well your mama is out of guesses, what happened today?” You asked as Kaito placed his head on your shoulder, his fingers playing with your hair.

“Midoriya-chan had a baby brother.” Kaito sighed as he placed your hair against his face, and you looked down at Kaito who stared back at yours. His y/e/c piercing through you, but he had no idea that he was. “Which means that Midoriya-ojii-san can’t come to babysit me anymore!”

You nod your head as you sighed. Typical Kaito forgetting that he had found that out a few weeks ago! You and Shouto had taken Kaito to the hospital to meet Midoriya's new baby too. You and all your female friends had by coincidence gotten pregnant around the same time. It seemed that it was still happening even now.

“We met baby Midoriya last week, remember?” You prod softly as you let Kaito down as he bounded up the door, “Didn’t you say you wanted to be a big brother to him?”

“I want to be a big brother!” Kaito agreed, his head nodding as you unlocked the door, “But only so that the baby can eat my asparagus!”

Laughter overtakes you, and quickly you began to cry as you locked the door behind you. After settling down you instruct Kaito to finish his homework as he was ready to do anything but that.

Later that night, you and Kaito sat at the table eating dinner while singing along to the songs on the radio. Kaito sighed rubbing his face, “Mama, when’s papa coming back? He’s been gone for so long! I miss him...”

Your face fell in the overwhelming love you had for your child and his love for his father. “I miss your papa, too. He’s supposed to be back tomorrow, baby. Remember he called us last night and told you?”

“Yeah, but he could’ve been lying! Like when he tells you he’s doing nothing when me and him get cookies! Okay, but don’t tell him I miss him!” Kaito grinned as he shoved white rice into his mouth.

“Why wouldn’t I tell your papa that?!” You gasp looking at Kaito with squinted eyes, he was such a brat sometimes.

“Easy! I wouldn’t want papa to be sad, and then make you mad because papa loves me more than he loves you!”

You roll your eyes at your red-headed child and sighed. “I can do that, as long as you promise not to tell your papa that he’s no longer my favorite!”

“HAHAHA PAPA ISN’T YOUR FAVORITE—hey, wait, maMA!!”

The sounds of Kaito and you shouting and laughing audible from down the street. The night seems to only begin as you and your son play fought around the dining room.

But it came to a quick end when you had to stop Kaito who was trying to climb up your leg. Your body felt completely nauseous, and the gag in your throat told you that you were about to throw up. So you ran to the bathroom, Kaito’s worried screams following after you.

Bile and vomit rose up your throat as your retched into the toilet. The bitter acid burning your mouth as you threw up for a solid minute. You felt like your body was on fire as you sank to the floor unable to stop your sobs.

“Are you okay, mama?! Please tell me you're okay, mama!” Kaito shook your shoulder, and you could hear the tears in his voice as you rose back up to throw up again.

“Kaito-chan, move please.” The smooth voice of your husband calls and you look up to see Shouto in the doorway, still donning his costume.

“Papa, mama is th-throwing up!” Kaito sobbed as Shouto stepped over to you. Placing his left hand on your back, and his right hand on your neck, your body felt better as soon as his quirk activates.

Your sobs slowly stopped. You felt your sickness ease while Shouto is careful while massaging your body. Kaito is now plugged by your side, his cheeks wet with tears, and you rub your fingers into his scalp. Your free hand moves to touch your beginning to swell belly as you looked up at Shouto. Your head nodding, and a nonverbal agreement came between the two of you. You were sure you had vomit in the corner of your mouth, but Shouto leans down and presses a gentle kiss to your lips. It's an encouraging kiss, and you feel at ease. After flushing the toilet for you, Shouto sat down on the bathroom floor, handing you a cup of water that you swallow down in thanks.

The entire Todoroki family finally accounted for.

“I’m okay, baby,” You whisper, continuing to stroke Kaito's head, “I’m okay.”

“What’s wrong with you, mama?” Kaito asks, his eyes red and puffy as he stared into your face. His tiny hands coming to press themselves up against your cheeks. “You’re not dying, are you!?”

You watch as Shouto comes and places a hand on Kaito’s head, ruffling his hair softly. “We actually have a secret we need to tell you,” Shouto says as Kaito whips his head to stare at his father. “You have to promise to keep our little secret though.”

Kaito blinks a few times. He is unsure of what this secret could be, but he nods his head as he squirms in your arms until he’s sitting in your lap. “I can... I can do that.”

“You know how I asked you if you wanted to be a big brother earlier?” You say nuzzling Kaito’s soft hair with your nose. You feel Kaito’s head nod, he was still oblivious to what's coming.

“Your mama is pregnant, Kaito.” Shouto continues as the two of you study Kaito, who turns his attention towards you. His confusion on the word pregnant swimming in his eyes.

“You’re going to be a big brother, Kaito-chan.” You whisper, tears forming in your eyes.

Kaito stands up from your lap and sits on his knees, staring at your belly. You watch as your breath hitches as he gets rather close to your belly, and places his small hand on you. “Hi, little brother, or little sister, my name is Todoroki Kaito! I’m your big brother! I don’t really know what you do? Did my mama eat you? If so, I will tell her to poop you out because that’s mean of her! I’m mama AND papa’s favorite though, so don’t be jealous when you find out they love me more! Oh! Also! I have a lot of toys you can play with!”

You stared up at Shouto with tears flowing down your face. Your facial expressions changing from glee to utmost sadness. But your eyes gaze lovingly at your husband who also wipes a tear away as your son talks to your belly. You grabbed Shouto’s hands bringing him closer to you.

You kissed him gently, over and over.

“Welcome home, Shoucchan.” You sniffle as he continued pressing small pecks to your mouth.

“Papa is kissing mama, it’s pretty gross!! Papa takes all the kisses away from mama, and all the leftovers are for me, so don’t be sad if you don’t get any! We’ll just have to kick papa out of mama's kiss list!”

A snort escapes Shouto’s as he leans back rolling his eyes, “Damn kid,” He whispers and you laugh full of mirth.

“You know what, Kaito-chan?” You say as your son tears his one-sided conversation from your belly.

“What, mama?”

“Your papa does lie a lot, look he’s back today!”

there’s going to be one more part for this little unintentional series, but i think after that it may be time to retire kaito and co. only because i don’t want to bore you all. i hope you guys liked it! please comment and like if you did ;)

bonus!

“Alright, y/n-sama, and Todoroki-sama, and Kaito-chan! Let’s have a look at the baby!” The doctor smiles as she places the gel on your belly. A gasp escaping your lips from the coldness and sudden pressure of the ultrasound on your stomach.

“So my mama didn’t eat my baby? Are you sure?!” Kaito asks again as he holds onto your hand peering at your relatively small belly still. “She doesn’t look fat enough to have done that!”

“Kaito!” You and Shouto exclaim, staring at your son who decides to laugh as he plays with you hair.

“How many weeks are you again?” Your doctor asked, confusion coming across her face.

“Twenty-two.” You say glancing her way, you were nervous, why was that a major concern.

“Well, if you would like to look, here’s your first babies head.” The doctor states. Her finger pointing at a fuzzy circle. You were never good at seeing the baby through an ultrasound picture.

Wait did she say—

“First?!” Kaito says a horrified gasp on his face, “MY MAMA ATE TWO BABIES?!”

“Congrats Todoroki-san’s, you’re having twins! One girl and one boy!”

You looked over at Shouto who seemed just as shocked as you. “Oh my god…”

Tears flow out your eyes and you see the same for Shouto as he comes down to give you the gentlest of kisses.

“Papa, mama ate my baby brother and sister and you’re kissing her?! You must reaaallllyyyy love her!”

“I do really love your mama, Kaito-chan, don’t you?”

“Of course I do! BUT she ate my baby brother and baby sister. That's CRAZY!"

[evien-stark]

✧I Need You✧  Chapter 200

The last Sunday of the month had invited all the charitable rich to another gaudy event. Having your picture taken as you entered was really the only price worth paying. Six digit donations were nothing to people with deep pockets. They wanted adoration. Acknowledgment of their good deeds for humanity. Rich people were the worst. And you and Tony were as rich as they came. So you would know. 

And one thing you certainly knew was how much you absolutely hated these events. The fake smiles, the cheesy laughter, the shows for cameras lined outside an obvious event carpet. Paid paparazzi and news outlets parked every inch of the way. Walking the generous mile (at least it definitely felt that way) into the event where, once safely inside away from all the cameras and microphones, the pretending would stop. They’d preen and dote upon one another and forget the reason for even being there- if they even knew which charity they’d made an appearance for at all. Usually just personal assistants writing out the RSVPs and picking outfits, calling cars, and writing checks. 

These people didn’t care about anyone but themselves. ...but money was money. 

And money they wouldn’t even notice was gone going to help people that were in definite need was worth something, right? It was worth slugging through these events multiple times a year. It was just rude to send money and not show. No- you were part of the show. So you had to go. Much as you were too busy and too uninterested in being anywhere near this social circle the rich and famous had crafted for themselves. Safe and familiar away from the less fortunate that they were celebrating- 

“You alright, honey?” Tony had probably noticed your mean-mugging and glassy eyed stare from across the room as you looked at yourself in the vanity mirror. 

That was signal enough that all the fussing about was over. Both hairdresser and makeup artist taking their cue to put on the finishing touches and scurry away. “I’m just tired.” Feeling safe to say this once the two of you were alone in the bedroom again. This was your answer more often these days, which was probably not a great thing. 

Standing up, you discarded your robe and went to unzip your overly ritzy dress from its garment bag. While Tony was still half turned away getting himself dressed, you stepped into it. A gorgeous entirely too-expensive dress, as always for something like this. It was black with champagne-gold colored details. A snugly fitted mermaid line with a slightly large train at the bottom. The arms and extremely deep v-line were all sheer mesh, giving the illusion of bareness, gold leaflet details spreading across your collar bones, lining the cups of the dress and the V shape, down over your hips, some across your arms, and many lining the bottom. Perfectly matched, of course, with Tony’s black and exact same champagne-gold tux. Black pants and suit jacket, black button up with a gold waistcoat, pocket square, and bow tie. One he was currently fumbling with. Or pretending to. As he always did. You went to his aid (as you always did), reaching up to tie the fabric to expert perfection. His smile was grateful and warm. “What would I do without you?” 

“I shudder to think.” Teasing him a little before you turned opposite him, gently guiding your expensively-done hair forward over your shoulder. “Would you mind?”

The tips of his fingers were warm and soft as he glided them down the length of your exposed back. Turned away, you didn’t mind the flutter of your eyes as they closed. But hiding one expression from him didn’t help- as you breathed out softly, probably in that overly telling way. You could hear his smirk without even having to look at him. “Zipper’s already down. I’m sure you could get out of the rest of it without my help, but… since you asked…” 

He went so far as to drift his hands back up and slip them underneath the shoulders of your dress, like he actually might take it off you. You turned your head back and were too amused to make the sentiment as serious as you would have liked. “Tony, stop.” 

“Should I?” His brow arched in that high delicate line. “You don’t wanna go, I don’t wanna go…” So why not stay here? A question left unasked. Not that it mattered. You just ended up shaking your head. “Well, we have to. It’ll be less trouble that way.” If you paid your charitable entrance fee and then didn’t show, somebody would make a stink about it come tomorrow. And that was just more headache than you needed. 

“You say that- and yet-” Protesting, even as he finally acquiesced, hands dropping to pull your zipper up all the way. Practically sealing you into your dress. Maybe locked was the better word. 

“Let’s not tempt fate.” All you had to do was get in, take pictures, pretend to be happy talking to any number of people who would bother you that night, maybe drink a glass of wine, have a dance, and then leave. How much trouble could happen between all that? 

As you laid your hand on his chest, he put his over yours, just holding you there for a second. His smile then was brief. “You’re right.” 

But it was already too late for that. 

                                                               ---

This being the first public event the two of you had attended since letting everyone in on the engagement, Tony seemed to be hamming it up more than usual. Sure, he was a shutterbug and seemed to enjoy posing for cameras (thumbs up, peace signs, grand gesturing as was his way), he was now involving you. And no doubt he’d be looking over the photos that came out of this event in the morning. 

He seemed to switch his handedness- usually he’d be throwing up signs with his right, as came natural to him, but now he made every move with his left. Displaying his ring proudly. Making it obvious and clear- look, we’re engaged, this is going to be my wife, I get to be her husband. To say that he was glowing would be putting it mildly. His smiles were more genuine than they’d ever be for something like this. 

Because he had you at his side. And he was showing off. While the two of you walked down the outside aisle to the event, he had an arm around your waist. And when you stopped to pose for the cameras, he’d take your hand in his and press a kiss to the back. Yes. Even calling it showing off was putting it mildly. Tony Stark was strutting as a new-fiance. And maybe that made all of this worth it. 

But letting your guard down for even a second or believing that the evening was going your way invited trouble. Trouble in the form of a woman in an all white dress storming her way to you. In contrast to your sharp and gorgeous lines she was wearing a billowy frock that seemed a little hard to move around in. You guessed she was going for some angelic vibe. 

The second Joy Meachum stopped- not in front of you, but at your side, purposefully so the cameras and press could hear and see the both of you clearly, you held a hand up to her. “Don’t do this here.” Whatever she was planning, whatever she wanted to say, you wanted no part of it. But especially not in front of the hungry press. 

Tony’s hand squeezed yours but he maintained a calm and watchful air. Joy just grinned. “Why not? They’ll eat this up. It’s good for business.” 

“Not yours, certainly.” Trying to scare her away with a steely-eyed stare. “And unlike you, I’m not a dancing circus monkey. I don’t take pride in putting on a show just for press points.” 

This incensed her quite clearly, but underneath that there was a certain wave of fear. Hm. So Joy Meachum was frightened of you. As she should be. But putting on a brave face. “I just wanted to say that I think it’s extremely nasty, what you’re doing. Women like us should prop each other up. There are so few of us in the business. Attacking me-” 

“I made a simple statement about the affairs of your business. Nothing I said was untrue, either, by the way. And if it were, you’d have already tried to slap me with a lawsuit. Grandstanding will not pull you out of this hole you’ve put yourself in.” You remained expertly calm, not giving in to this theater she was putting on. 

But she just couldn’t help herself. “I know you’re helping the guy going around pretending to be Danny Rand. I think it’s tasteless and some sort of power play for-”

“Please. If I wanted Rand Enterprises I’d have it tomorrow. You’re lucky I don’t want to be associated with the kind of overpriced drugs you sell.” Okay. You were giving in just a little. But she wanted a fight. “Go away now, you’re making a fool out of yourself.” 

Her hands went tight into little fists at her side. “You have no idea what I’ve been through to bring this company where it is. I was born into this. I belong here. You just slept your way up.” 

The roll of your eyes probably wasn’t dramatic enough. Tony seemed like he had a mind about him to say something but you finally gave him a return squeeze to keep him at bay. You could and would handle this yourself. “You can’t preach to me the merits of friendly business feminism in one breath and then in the very next call me a slut- but- let’s pretend for a second that that’s even true. It at least goes to show how much more work I put into my career than you did with yours. You don’t get credit for falling out of your mother onto a pile of money.” Shock was a bold color on her, and a dozen non-starters escaped from her mouth as she grasped for something to say to that. Instead of letting her attempt to defend herself you finished with, “What matters is what you do with that after the fact, and so far I have seen nothing to indicate you have anything worth being proud of.” With that you gave Tony a little tug and he was quick to your side as the two of you turned. But he did offer her a little wave. “Nice seeing you, Joy.” 

The two of you played completely unaffected. Her creepy brother came to her aide, something you saw just out of the corner of your eye, as you and Tony were making your way- finally- to the entrance. He couldn’t help one last hammy action, leaning in to press a dashing kiss to your cheek with a wide smile. You couldn’t help yourself, either, turning the other way to catch him next, raising your left hand to cup his cheek, as you held him there in a brief but full kiss. He found something funny; you knew exactly what. And, as he pulled away, you let him know. “I warned you I’d put her in her place if she tried anything.” 

His chuckles seemed to go straight through you. “Yeah. Someone should’ve warned her.” 

                                                              ---

A crowd of asskissers was immediately imminent as soon as you two made your way inside. It was exactly why Tony pressed another kiss to your hand and then let go. “Can I buy you a drink?” You smiled in an amused and fond way. “Now, you wouldn’t be trying to abandon me so that you don’t have to talk to anybody, would you?” He made such a face of hurt. “I would never.” But as the footsteps drew closer… “I’ll call you over from the bar. Then you can escape, too. It’s a good plan.” 

Leaning up on tiptoe you pressed a kiss to his cheekbone. “Just a glass of wine, please.” 

The usual hemming and hawing came all around you as Tony made a quick exit to the back of the room. For a change, the usual familiars that pretended to care about your life weren’t asking about the next social event they could catch you at- now they were asking for much more intimate details. What is your ring made out of? How much was it worth? When’s the wedding? Where is the wedding? Who will be designing your dress? Do you have an event coordinator yet? Wedding planner? Menu? Bar? It all gave you a headache. All these questions were detached. Completely impersonal despite how they seemed. They were designed for one reason. To ask how much was being spent. As if that was the only mark of love that either Tony or you could impart to each other. Spending money on one another. 

They didn’t want to know when he proposed- or when you had. They didn’t want to know why you’d chosen the design of his ring or how he’d chosen yours. They didn’t want to know how long you’d been in love or if you’d always known you were going to get married. They didn’t care about your relationship with him. They cared about the wealth and the fame. The extravagance that should have been a Stark Wedding. 

...maybe Tony had been right about eloping all along. Maybe you should have gotten married on that beach in Fiji. The world was waiting for the two of you to say your vows. Not because they cared of their contents but because they all wanted to live vicariously through the both of you. And not for the love or the bond that you shared. Just for a window into the supposed life of luxury. Tony turning from the bar with two drinks in hand was all the excuse you needed to walk away. Which was what you did. Literally. No polite excuse me or I have to go to speak to someone you just… left. Let them call you rude later. Start gossiping about you. What did it matter? Appearances only went so far and you had long since cared about what any of these people had to say about you. 

As you met back up with Tony and gratefully took your glass of wine from him, he sipped lightly at his own glass of bourbon and seemed to be watching you. Until, finally, “What did they say now?” Seeming to sense either your upset or just how drained you suddenly were. 

For him you managed a smile. “I was just thinking about how almost seven years ago those exact same people refused to believe when I said we’d come to an event together. And now… all they care about is how much money we’re blowing on a wedding.” The art gala at Basel. A lifetime ago. As most things felt these days, looking back. Some of those exact same people that night, in fact, who had laughed and waved you off, offered to stay with you when Tony left without you- and then tried to flirt with him… Now their tunes had changed but only so much. They were still interested in Tony. And his fortune. Maybe, more importantly, what he was doing with it. 

You were unwisely already half finished with your glass when Tony’s smile caught you off guard. When you looked up at him questioningly, he held out his opposite hand for you. “Can we dance?” 

That’s what you’d asked him that night. In front of all the disbelievers. You’d asked him to whisk you away, not only just to be rid of them but to prove to the world that- yes- Tony Stark loved you of all people. And you loved him. Now, so many years later, you were done doing any sort of proving. You didn’t need to. You didn’t want to. 

You recalled the way he looked at you that night, when you’d asked that. And you also remembered him immediately coming to your rescue when he answered- the same way you were now- “Absolutely.” 

The both of you finished your drinks. Too quick to be anything other than a mistake. But you weren’t really planning on staying long enough for it to matter. And you had him looking out for you anyway. And you for him. 

He escorted you by the hand out to the dance floor where couples were shuffling back and forth, watching people out of the corners of their eyes while a live band played softly. But when the two of you stepped there, when he put his hands at your waist and you laid your arms up along his shoulders and touched your hands along the sides of his neck, they were all watching you. But none of them mattered. All that mattered was the way Tony kept you in time with a gentle sway, the way he was looking at you. Deep, soft brown eyes and loving smile. The way he warmed beneath you. He deserved a little credit. Your hands crept up a little further, touching into the back of his hair as you let the thought out into existence, “The world seems to be waiting for us to throw some big gaudy wedding but… I think maybe you had the right idea all along.” It was dangerous to tell him he was right about anything but…

Ah, what did it matter. Tony knew (and definitely thought) he was right all the time anyway. 

His lips curved more into a quiet smirk but there was a sudden light in his eyes. “Had a change of heart? You wanna go sign some papers tomorrow?” 

“Not tomorrow but… I think I’ll keep putting off planning a wedding. And we’ll just keep being engaged.” Trying to be honest with yourself, and him. 

He gave a little shrug. “Not the worst thing in the world. Not my favorite idea, but. Not the worst.” 

Finally you looped one arm loosely around him, moving the other down to lay against his chest. Over his heart. “It’s not that I don’t want to.” 

“I never suspected that.” 

“It’s just… I don’t know when will be the right time. And… I want everyone to be there. That should be there.” Saying this hurt your heart a little. Thor was gone almost all the time. He’d be happy for the two of you, no doubt. But there was also Bruce. Nobody knew his whereabouts. Still. Was it right to just continue living life when he’d been gone for so long? Surely if he was alright he would have made contact by now, wouldn’t he have? Tony and he were so close… 

A sure blue formed over Tony then, and that smirk disappeared almost instantly. “Yeah.” Said out on a sigh. “Seems like we’re caught in the middle of conflicting ideologies here.” 

Making you realize you both said you may have wanted to just call it quits on a wedding and get married soon and that you wanted to delay until it felt right. Which one was it? It couldn’t be both. “...there’s no rush, right?” Asking him this almost guiltily. 

Something that seemed to sadden him. “Of course not. If I made you feel that way-” 

“You didn’t.” Assuring him of this quickly, not wanting him to take the blame for your messy feelings. 

He stopped moving in time with the music, moving his right hand from your hip so that he could take yours from his chest. Lifting, he pressed a kiss to the back, and then to the side, and then just over your knuckles. “I love you. If you wanted to sign papers tomorrow, we’d go. If you want to wait a few more years to make it official, we will.” Because Tony would do whatever you wanted. 

...but… 

“What do you want?” 

“I want…” He was almost quick into answering this but stopped himself. Seemed like he really wanted to consider this before whipping an answer out. “I want you to be happy.” 

This answer was was both satisfying and yet completely unsatisfying. “I want you to be happy, too.” 

“You being happy makes me happy.” 

This was getting absurd. And when both of you realized that, the smiles and laughter weren’t too far behind. In fact, as his eyes closed with that breathy bout of chuckles, he pressed the rumbling noise against the inside of your palm. It was too much to ask that you didn’t fall apart over him. “I love you, Tony.” 

“I love you.” His answer was immediate and genuine. “It’s a wonder anything gets done around here.” The two of you only just realizing, somehow, that you let a lot (if not all) of your actions be guided by the sense of how it would affect one another. How was it then that you didn’t just circle endlessly? 

“I think we’re doing alright.” 

He leaned in, lips just barely touching yours. “I think so, too.” 

                                                              ---

Another hour slipped by, most of which was filled with one-and-a-half more glasses of wine that was still a mistake and woozy, lovey dancing. You weren’t worried about your consumption of alcohol or what it would do to you because you had Tony with you. But because you had Tony with you, that hour later and some blood alcohol level higher than when you started was pointing you in the direction of home. You wanted to be free from this environment and just be home. With Tony. ...but that wine in your system was also pointing you towards the bathroom. Which would be wise before you got into a car and went back home. So you asked Tony to hold your clutch for you and wait somewhere fairly close. You wouldn’t take long. And you didn’t. ...at least you were sure you hadn’t. Just a quick pee, a reasonable amount of time washing your hands, drying them, getting the little lotions and the… whatever else the bathroom attendant was telling you. The words went in one ear and out the other- and she had a lot of them. It seemed like she just couldn’t stop talking. Politeness eventually ran out and you excused yourself from her presence. Lucky for you your dress had pockets and you were not a fool. Not tipping was one of the worst faux pas one could commit. Especially after running off. 

While you were sure you hadn’t been in there too long, Tony was nowhere to be seen when you emerged. Which was strange. And probably also a red flag. You thought he may have gone back to the bar for a quick drink before the two of you called Happy for an escort home- but he wasn’t there either. ...however. You did spot Ward Meachum there. Joy’s weird older brother. Fawning over two glasses of champagne. He had his back mostly turned. And another second later you wouldn’t have cared why or even paid any attention. Except seconds were running a little long for you- and you saw him half turned away- breaking a capsule open over one of the glasses. It was then your duty to keep an eye on him- to warn whatever poor girl he was about to hand that glass to- whomever he was planning on dragging out of here tonight. Surprise, surprise. That girl was apparently you. 

He headed one way, looking for you, and then turned in your direction, spotting you. For a moment you felt glued in place. He couldn’t be serious, right? Maybe you hadn’t seen that correctly… maybe your vision was just as impaired as your judgment. 

His smile was cold. And his guts were nervous. That told you about all you needed to know. He called your name a few feet before closing the deal. Sticking you in your spot. There against the wall where his figure stood over you. Blocking you from view. “I’ve been looking for you.” 

“I can’t imagine why.” You tried to be careful and calculating, but your brain was a little mushy. Ward had put something in a drink he seemed like he was about to hand off to you- ...no, that couldn’t be, right? He just… he wouldn’t do that- 

“I wanted to apologize for the way my sister acted earlier. She often feels like it’s her against the world, so I hope you didn’t take it too personally.” He was still smiling. You said nothing. Which made him uncomfortable. Maybe it was just the way you were looking at him. “Look- I uh… I know we haven’t spent much time around each other, but I think this whole Danny Rand business is a perfect time to get to know one another.” 

“Why’s that?” 

“Because you seem to be helping him. And I can’t imagine why that is.” He delivered this with such cruelty. Like he had something over you- or at least he soon would. 

“Maybe I believe him.” You tried to draw yourself up tall and strong, straightening out your spine, putting a hand on your hip. 

“So you admit it.” Like he’d caught you in a trap. 

You simply smiled back at him then, something serene. “I’ve done nothing wrong.” 

“Maybe not. But I also think you’re not a fool. So I’m having trouble figuring out how this crazy man off the street duped you. You’re at the top of your game. You’re smart. You’re cunning. Yet you’re wasting money on this sham?” It was obvious what he was doing. Trying to butter you up. 

Regardless of if everything he was saying was true- and it was. Which was exactly why you weren’t falling for this act. 

He took your silence as permission to keep prattling on. “Aren’t you busy? Don’t you have better things to be doing than entertaining psychosis?” 

“And what should I be doing with my time?” 

“Spending it with me-” He finally held out that glass. “-in a purely professional sense, of course. I’m not a fool to get in between you and Stark. But I think it’s long overdue that Stark Industries and Rand Enterprises had a sit down.” 

Ward Meachum was handing you a glass of overly expensive champagne that he’d drugged.

You knew this. You knew this- so you had every defense against it. There was no reason to be frightened of him. But you were. Because he was doing this. In the middle of a party. Where everyone and anyone could see him. He was doing it in a place where Tony was probably not very far away- and if he got caught, he was liable to be murdered. At the very least thrown in jail- 

But he was doing it anyway. Because he had every intention of you swallowing that down and then whisking you off somewhere to do god knew what with you. He felt safe. He thought he could get away with it.

...that thought alone was terrifying. 

It was why, when you stood there. Stuck. Staring at that glass, he smiled again, and tried to press it into your hand. “That’s a glass of 1914 Moët & Chandon. Figured I’d get something expensive to celebrate our potential partnership.”

With a steady hand you reached out to take that glass, and sensed the writhing satisfaction inside of him. Because he was getting away with this. That was at least until you looked away from that glass, finally, and up at him. “If you seriously drugged this champagne, Danny Rand coming back from the dead will be the least of your problems.” Promising him this. Warning him. 

His victory died. Immediately. Instead an icy fright wormed its way through his veins. He quickly took the glass back. “That’s- that’s quite an accusation. I know your other job probably has you paranoid but-” 

“What? You thought you’d just get away with that?” 

“Get away with what?” Tony had finally reappeared, just behind Ward- and of course, an out of breath Joy was in tow. Tony had probably come looking for you when he’d realized he was being bamboozled. Joy had taken him away so that Ward could come get you. 

And- with the safety of Tony there- his protection and… the frightening and mortifying thought that Ward Meachum had had plans to do something with you- you kind of… lost it a little. Your voice raised and your point was just short of frantic. “He just tried to give me drugged champagne.” 

Ward was suddenly sweating. “She’s- I think you need to take her home. She’s had one too many.” 

Tony’s focus was laser sharp. Dark and intense. And… terribly angry. “Give me the glass.” Demanding. Basically laying down the sudden law. Ward seemed like he might actually do it- as if Tony had powers of authority he just couldn’t deny- but Joy shifted around Tony and then bumped into Ward. Shoving him, more like it. He dropped the glass in an act that was entirely see-through. It shattered on the floor. He then held his hand up. “Ah- we’ll have to get someone to clean that up- come on, Joy…” Trying to make a hasty exit. 

The siblings were quick to leave, and Tony stepped forward with a mind to grab Ward. Probably by his collar. Or his throat. But you put your own hand around his arm to stop him. Causing a scene here was probably their plan-B. The problem was, Tony was overwhelmingly furious. And he now had nowhere to put it. “You saw him put something in your drink?” Not asking you because he doubted you. Asking you so that it would give him permission to go after them. And while you didn’t want him to do that- not here, anyway- you nodded. “At the bar. I know I’m a little drunk, but not that drunk. Joy carted you off- and I think they paid off my bathroom attendant, she wouldn’t let me leave.” All in an attempt to isolate you and give Ward enough time to do the deed. 

The serious look Tony wore was not one of your favorites. He then crouched down without another word, shifting his arm forward to reveal his watch from underneath his sleeve. He tapped on the front screen, activating it. It was similar to the one he’d given you- the one meant to be an interim defense mechanism while he was still working on your new Reactor. Two plates shifted out from the face. He then dipped his fingers in the liquid pooled on the floor and touched it against the glass sticking out of the left side. “FRIDAY, give me a full compound analysis.” 

“Yes, boss.” 

People were staring. Tony Stark was practically kneeling on the ballroom floor after Ward and Joy Meachum had run away. With some new shiny gadget activated. What was going on! How exciting! 

FRIDAY was quick. “Assuming you’re not looking for the beverage details, but I’ve found-” A small holographic chart beamed to life. “-muscarine and scopolamine. Enough to be fatal about three hours after consumption.” 

You didn’t know what those two compounds were. You didn’t really need to. The way Tony’s heart felt like it was twisting told you all you needed to know. It wasn’t that he intended to have you drink that glass and dump you in an alley to die. There were three whole hours before that. 

Hours he had probably been planning on filling with- 

“Let’s go.” You put a hand on Tony’s shoulder. The way he was looking at you… he wanted you to give him permission to go after Ward, still. In fact he needed it. But you couldn’t let him do that. “...please.” 

It took him a moment, and it was only through great strength that he ignored his instincts to throttle the man that had intended to drug you. But finally he stood. His hand found yours in a tight hold. “Why would he do that? And why here?” 

“They thought they could get away with it.” That was really the only answer you had. Why else would they? You had threatened their business and propped up a potential king to their throne. They wanted you gone. 

But so did everyone else. So they’d have to get in line. 

                                                              ---

The ride home had been quiet but intense. As soon as you’d gotten upstairs into the penthouse, the two of you had sat down on the foyer couch, still in your evening wear. You’d snuggled up to him, legs underneath you, head on his shoulder, and his arm had come around you all the way so that his fingers could sink into your hair and work against your scalp. Dvahli had not waited long to curl up across both your laps. Tony was the braver of the two of you- or perhaps he was just still unable to process that mountain of anger the right way. He had nowhere to put it. Didn’t know what to do with it. “Let’s put a story out to the press tomorrow.” -...and going with paparazzi buzz was certainly not his style. 

“They’d eat it up, for sure.” If the Starks accused the Meachums of trying to pump you full of date rape drugs, the entire world would be foaming at the mouth for more, more, more. What a sensational story. ...you didn’t want to deal with all that. You weren’t sure you could. Wouldn’t that paint you as an unwitting victim? Wouldn’t it make it seem like that was possible? It shouldn’t have been…  “But. They’re in the middle of a losing battle.” 

The breath out of him was tight. “You have eyes on Rand?” He wasn’t really asking if you’d been following up with what he was doing. He was asking if there’d been any sort of progress. Or if it had panned out the way you wanted it to. “No.” Being truthful. After you’d sent him on his way you’d tried not to involve yourself anymore. 

“Then how do you know that?” This cut you a little, the way he was just short of accusing you. The feeling must have slithered between you because he was quick to correct himself. “It’s not that I don’t believe you- if you say the guy is Danny Rand, then he is. But look at what they just tried to do to you. Think of what they’ll try to do to him.” 

He had an excellent point. As always. “You’re right. But. Danny’s not normal. He’s not going down without a fight.” 

You watched as Tony’s opposite hand waved around while he spoke. “Right. Because he’s been palling around with Lando in Cloud City. I remember.” Tony’s annoyance was now mixed with his overwhelming frustration. He was getting sassy. At you. So you sat away from him, unfortunately disturbing Dvahli who made a sad noise over it. But you looked at him. He looked at you. Dvahli looked between the both of you. Tony broke first with a frown. “I’m sorry. I just… what am I supposed to do?” 

Asking you this earnestly. He’d just been told that the love of his life had been on the end of a scheme meant to drug her and murder her. What was he supposed to do with everything he was feeling? 

Settling again, you turned, putting a hand on Dvahli to comfort her, and then did the same to Tony, holding his face in your other palm. His hand reached up, closing around your wrist. Holding tight to you. “Let’s… think about the alternatives.” 

“Let’s not.” 

“No, let’s do.” Trying to urge him. He quieted when he sensed your resolve. “Let’s pretend we live in a world where I would have been stupid enough to take even a sip of that champagne. I know Joy had been trying to pull you away, but I also know you were waiting for me. I never would have left with him. You would have stopped us. And you would have realized something was wrong with me. Taken me to the labs. Worked on a way to fix me. Like you always do.” 

In this fabricated world where Ward Meachum had gotten away with this, Tony still would have rescued you. You knew this. And you knew he knew it too. This wouldn’t have ended with your shame, your humiliation and degradation and then death. It just wouldn’t have. Because of him. 

...but apparently he wasn’t feeling confident enough to buy into this. “What if I hadn’t?” Fixating on the worst possible outcome. Probably because he couldn’t stop himself. “What if I hadn’t seen you coming out of the bathroom. Or him talking to you. Him taking you away. What then?” 

Then… Then Tony would have been responsible for your death. That’s how he felt. And that feeling was very heavy and terrible. 

“But more than that-” He continued, eyes watching yours. Pleading. “More than these hypotheticals- you want me to sit here when they planned to do that and not do anything about it?” 

You wanted to let them get away with it. That’s what he was implying. Second only to begging to understand why he couldn’t go after them over this. They hadn’t gotten away with it, but they’d still planned to do it. Didn’t that deserve some kind of action? 

Again when you didn’t answer, he spoke. “What if it were me?” 

This was a dirty play. Because only a few days ago you’d told him exactly what you would have done. According to you, you would have scorched the earth for him. And now you were denying him the chance to return that. That wasn’t very fair. And it was eating him up inside. He wanted something. 

...so… 

Leaning forward, you rested your forehead against his. “Please… let’s see how this Danny Rand stuff pans out.” He sucked in a breath to try and argue with you, but you put two fingers against his lips. “And if it doesn’t… you have my permission to drag Ward Meachum to a defunct SHIELD blacksite. And after that I don’t wanna know.” 

Tony was not a murderer. Not like that. But because it was you… who knew the lengths he would go to. This was all talk. So that made it okay. And he needed some feeling of release. This seemed to grant it to him. 

He eased, lips curving into a tired smile against your fingers. When you let your hand away from his face, “Thank you.” Then, now feeling better, he found the strength to joke. “Is it so much to ask that I be able to murder the people who try to hurt my wife?” 

“I guess not- but- I’m also not your wife.” 

“Not yet. It’s been proven that if I bug you enough about something, eventually you’ll give in.” His grin was sweet and handsome. “You’re already thinking about it.” Going to just sign papers, he meant.

Eloping. And he was right. Maybe he really did have it all figured out. “Yeah. Well. I still have some more thinking to do yet.” 

The way he was gazing at you made your heart melt. But it was his calm, quiet yet deep tone that had you yearning for him. “I’ve got time.” 

[misssophiachase]

Putting this here just in case: Celebrity Klaroline, they are co-stars on a super popular show and have been secretly dating for years. They decide to reveal to the public that they are engaged via an Instagram-live during quarantine.

Thank you, luv, this one is so much fun and reminds me of Bob and Eliza my  Bellarke babies : ) So, they are my inspiration. I hope you like it, it got a bit longer than I’d envisaged. 

Do You Want to Know a Secret?

“So, let me get this straight,” she began. “You’re going to announce your engagement via Instagram Live?”

“Didn’t we just say that?” 

“I was repeating myself to emphasise my point not because I didn’t hear you,” Rebekah growled, looking between them. Even via Skype she still had that scary ‘don’t mess with me’ demeanour. “Last time I checked I was your publicist and it’s my job to tell you when you are doing something stupid, today is case in point.”

“And while we appreciate the, uh, services you provide, little sister,” Klaus mumbled. “It really is up to us how we let people know about the engagement.”

“You’ve been secretly dating for years, not one paparazzi shot, not one late-night TMZ ambush, not one Perez Hilton catty headline, not one on-set insider account, not one secret, comic con moment, not…”

“We get the picture, Rebekah,” Caroline interrupted. “We’re stealth as Kol would say.”

“Did he put you up to this? Because on further reflection it seems like one of his immature, ill-conceived ideas.”

“I’ll tell him you send your love, Rebekah,” Klaus teased thinking about his little brother and manager.

Klaus Mikaelson and Caroline Forbes were co-stars of the most popular sci-fi drama on television. Their characters were engaged in an on-again-off-again romance but what the public didn’t know was their favourite on-screen couple were off-screen as well. 

Not that it had started out that way, in fact it was more adversarial

2 years earlier…

“You did not just kick me there!” He growled, rolling around on the floor in pain. The director had just called ‘cut’ and the series leads were fighting, yet again.

The tension between them had been present from the first audition and the producers thought it was exactly what they needed in their two leads Cole Hamilton and Riley James.

As predicted, there was fireworks on-screen but off-screen was another story. The tension bubbling below the surface was threatening to boil over. The cast and crew were taking bets on when they were going to finally relieve the tension.  

“Like I meant to,” Caroline replied, the slight smile tugging at the end of her lips was telling him otherwise.

“Maybe we should get you a stunt person if you’re going to be such a danger on-set, love?” He insisted, eventually standing up fully recovered.

“Maybe we should get you one of those protective cups for your privates, you know just in case the stunt person accidentally does the same?”  

Their mouths were now within inches of each other, their intense gaze showing no signs of faltering.

As it turned out the tension did boil over in her trailer later that day. Bets were won and the couple found ways to relieve the tension, first as a physical arrangement but then they went and fell in love.  

“Keeping our relationship out of the public eye has been amazing because we’ve been able to do things at our pace without any intrusion from the media, but it has also been the most difficult experience,” Caroline explained. “There’s only so many years of Uber Eats and Netflix I can handle.”

“Don’t forget the chill part, love,” Klaus murmured in her ear.

“Way to put me off my breakfast! Even I can hear you, Niklaus,” the familiar sound of his brother-in-law came over the speaker. 

“Well Lorenzo, maybe you two should go and do that and we can….”

“Why can’t you just put up a cute picture and caption it with a ring emoji? I know it has all been done before but…”

“Everyone is doing Instagram Live, especially during the pandemic.”

“So if they all jumped off a bridge would you do that too, Niklaus? Also, don’t forget I have your Instagram password, Nik.”

“Unbelievable! How did you…” he trailed off before Caroline intervened. 

“You don’t know mine. Look, Rebekah, we appreciate your concern but it’s time to go public. And what better time than during a world crisis? If you ask me people need some good news, now more than ever.”

“Fine, I don’t agree but if you’re going to do this you realise there’s no way to control things once you start? People will be going crazy, more so since they’ve been cooped up in isolation and had no idea you were dating let alone engaged.”  

Two hours later

“We ready to do this?” She smiled, placing her hand on his. Yes, it was a completely unusual way to announce their engagement, let alone their secret relationship.

“As much as I’ve loved having this time to get to know you,” he murmured. “I’m excited for this next stage in our lives.”

“I know, it will be nice not to have to sneak around anymore,” she shared. “Although, I’m not looking forward to the hate I’ll get from all your female fans upset you’re off the market.”

“You’re worried about my fans, yours are absolutely rabid, love.”

“Well, at least we have the Ciley fandom,” he chuckled. “What do you think they’ll call our real-life ship?”

“The fact you’re asking that means you have been cooped up in quarantine too long,” she teased.

5 minutes later

Before they’d even started to speak the love hearts were flowing in a bright array of colour and the comments began and not just a couple, thousands within the first couple of minutes.

Turns out their fans didn’t need any words to work out what was happening given their steady stream of comments.  

“Some of you might be wondering…oh looks like many of you have come to that conclusion already given the comment from @mark91,” Klaus began, “And yes, agreed, I’m a lucky dog.”

“What he’s trying to say is that…oh @jazzy39 glad you like my sweater. But…”

“I’m sorry @rayna001 but yes I’m taken,” Klaus read, a  slight chuckle escaping his lips. “Funny you should mention that actually..”

“We wanted to announce that oh @arabella5700 looks like we don’t need to do that anymore.”

They looked at each other briefly before realising their news wasn’t really theirs anymore.

“Yes, we’re engaged,” Caroline murmured feebly, holding up her left hand which keen-eyed fans had already spotted within the first 30 seconds.

“And what better way to announce it than with out fans,” Klaus smiled. “Now, if only we had our own ship name…”

“Looks like @hermione1992 has already offered an option,” Caroline interrupted. “Klaroline, mmm interesting. What do you all think of that?”

After they’d fumbled through quite a few more questions, including what her dress was going to look like and if her co-stars Katherine Pierce and Bonnie Bennett would be bridesmaids, they finished the live stream.

“OMG,” Caroline moaned, flopping onto the couch next to him. “I’m exhausted.”

“It’s like the banks of the dam have given way and…”

“All those questions, it’s like two years worth of them all stored up,” Caroline murmured. “Your sexual prowess was one of my personal favourites.”

“Which you didn’t answer,” he pouted. “People out there are going to think I’m bad.”

“Yeah, because I was going to go into that on an Instagram Live,” she muttered. “I’m sure the parents of our younger fans would love that.”

“And after all that we didn’t get to make our own announcement,” he complained. “They are an observant bunch.”

“Well, give we’re all supposed to be in lock-down I imagine us being in the same place was a dead giveaway. We are now officially hashtag klaroline though,” she giggled. “It kind of has a nice ring to it.”

His phone beeped signalling a new message, Klaus didn’t have to be a genius to realise exactly who it would be. He picked it up lazily and consulted the screen.

“So, how did that go for you?”

“She’s never going to let us live that one down,” Klaus groaned.  

[schrijverr]

Golden Love

Dean is a succesfull actor and very much in love with his partner Castiel. When he is nominated for an Oscar he decides to screw caution and show the world how much he loves his angel.

Destiel Actor AU

On AO3.

Ships: Dean x Castiel

Warnings: none really, but if you find any, tell me!

~~~~~~~~~~~

“Who are you taking to the Oscars?” Castiel asked Dean with an inquiring look.

Dean rubbed the back of his head and said: “Uh, I was thinking about taking Sammy, no need to lie about relationships, you know. What about you?”

Castiel shrugged and said: “I was hoping of taking you, but that’s still out of the cards, so I’m probably going alone.”

Dean got a heartbroken look on his face and said: “I’m sorry, angel. I know you want to go public and it hurts me to see you like this, but you know I can’t, not yet. Sorry.”

Castiel gave him a smile and said: “I don’t mind the wait, I would hate to push you into something you’re uncomfortable with. I can wait until you are ready.”

“You could go with me and Sam, if you want?” Dean offered.

“Really?” Castiel asked, “that not too suspicious for you?”

Dean shook his head: “No, we have reconnected after three years, you know.” he smirked, “I need my supporting actor.”

Castiel rolled his eyes and gave Dean a small push as he said: “Assbutt, although it would be nice to go together for a change.”

They fell into silence as they thought about how much their life had changed since they had walked onto the set of Unnatural four years ago. They had hit it off right away and by the time they wrapped they were dating, but Castiels career was in the lift, he didn’t want to compromise that and Dean himself wasn’t ready for the world to know about his bisexuality either. So they hid it, but became good friends in the eye of the public.

But Unnatural had launched Deans career as well, so by the time it would be safe for Castiel to come it wasn’t for Dean and they decided that it would be safer to grow apart for the public eye, so their relationship wouldn’t be scrutinized as much.

This changed when they had found themselves starring in Off into the Sunset an action slash historical cowboy movie. They had been happy to work together and during the press tour they were unstoppable with their shenanigans and how happy they were to be “reunited” after “growing apart” all those years ago.

All was going well and now Dean was nominated for an Oscar. It was a dream come true, but Castiel was sad that they couldn’t enjoy this big milestone together, because Dean was hiding himself and with that hiding them.

It hurt Dean to see his beloved like this, but he was scared, so, so scared. Scared of the backlash from fans, scared to see everything he worked for the wash down the drain, scared for the threats he or Cas wold get, just scared. But sometimes when he saw Castiels face fall, he thought to himself that the hurt may be worth the smile he would see on Castiels face.

~

The day of the Oscars was here and Dean was vibrating in the car seat as the three of them approached the venue with the red carpet. Castiel was rubbing his back to calm him and Sam was telling him how everything would be fine, but both were unsure if it was working.

Dean didn’t respond, he had a plan, a plan with a huge maybe attached to it and it was stressing him out even more than just the nomination. He was gonna go through the motions of the red carpet, but then if he won, and it was a big if, but if he won, he was gonna go public with Castiel en his relationship. He knew Cas wanted to, the other had expressed it many time and it was just Dean who held them back and he didn’t want to, but he wanted a big event to make sure the paparazzi sharks had bigger fish to fry than their relationship, so this was his chance. If he won of course.

He blinked and sighed, but was pulled out of his frantic musings by Cas, who whispered: “We’re almost there. Are you going to be okay?”

He looked at Castiel and smiled. He gave him a quick peck on the cheek and said: “With you by my side? Always.”

Sam made gagging noises as Cas giggled lightly: “You cheese-ball.”

And with that smile, Deans worries faded away, he could get that award and tell the world about the most wonderful man he had ever met. He took a deep breath and opened the door, ready for the assault of flashing cameras.

~

“And the winner for best actor is…” presenter said, the whole room held its breath, “Dean Winchester!!”

The whole room burst into applause. Dean got wide eyes and looked at Castiel, who smiling as broad as he could, wishing he could kiss his man. Then Dean looked at Sam who was clapping and grinning as well, then he pushed Dean towards the stage.

Still in a daze he accepted the award, he began his speech: “I- I am just speechless, I’m serious this is amazing, really a dream come true. I didn’t do this alone of course, I had my little brother who always believed in me and my uncle Bobby, who raised me into this person, and of course the cast and crew of Off into the Sunset, who did amazing, and the fans, who came through with supporting the movie and me. But there is one person in particular I want to thank, Castiel Novak. He wasn’t just my supporting actor, but my supporting partner and I couldn’t have gotten through these past few years without him. He’s the best part of me and this statue right here, this is for him. Cas, my angel, I love you.”

Castiel had been sitting in the crowd, feeling the proudest and happiest he had ever been as he listened to Dean thank his brother and uncle and then the crew and cast and the fans. His eyes widened when he heard his name, then Dean went on and by the end of the little speech Castiel was full on crying. He knew he must have at least a hundred cameras on him, but he didn’t care.

Before Dean was done with his last words, Cas was on his feet and running to his partner. He met him on top of the stairs and crushed him in an embrace as he locked their lips. He could feel Dean smile into their kiss and after a minute, Cas leaned back and whispered: “I’m so proud of you, I love you too.”

Dean smiled back and pulled him back in for a short hug, then he lead them both back to their table, hand never leaving Castiels waist. At the table he hugged his brother, who was also holding back tears.

They had to fight through the interviews, with people asking way too intimate questions, but it was all worth it. Both of their faces hurt from smiling and Dean felt as if nothing could knock him down, he was invincible.

At the beginning of the show he had posted a picture on his Instagram of him in his outfit for the red carpet with the caption: I am nervous and very excited, whatever the outcome today I am glad to have made it this far. Thank all of you for the support, I couldn’t have done it without you all. See you tonight! #Oscars

Later in the night he posted another picture, this time it was a selfie of him and Cas, lying in their bed. They had shrugged out of their suit jackets and vests and had loosened their ties and popped a few of their buttons. They were smiling into the camera as Castiel leaned his head on Deans chest. The caption read: I have shared the last four years of my life with this man, he is the best I know and I am glad I get to share how amazing he is with the world. He is my angel and my everything and without him I wouldn’t have gotten the Oscar. I won’t apologize for not sharing what we had with you as fans, because I hope you will understand. All I ask is be kind, not just to me, but to everyone. Tonight was a victory, thank you all for that.

[americanroyalty-phff]

Chapter 5 - Public Eye & Packing

*May 2016*

“Kennedy, I need to talk to you.” My boss rounded the corner where my desk was. I was finishing on my days work.

“Yes sir.” I stood up and walked to his office with him.

He closed the door and sat down behind his desk littered with Manila folders and magazine covers, most of which had mine and Harry’s faces on. I took a seat in front of him and kept my eyes elsewhere besides his desk. I think I knew where this was going.

“Beau, I’ve had a few things brought to my attention.” He sighed. “It seems that you are in a high profile relationship. With a prince.”

“It seems to be that way, sir. We try to keep it as private as we can. That isn’t always possible due to his status and unfortunately mine.” I explained quickly.

“Unfortunately?”

“I never wanted to be in the public eye. It’s just how things became. Kennedy, my ex husband, now this. Just seems that I’m supposed to be. And for that, I’m sorry for any unwanted attention I bring to the bureau and any investigation.”

“We really value you as a special agent, Beau. You’ve been an essential part of many operations. But I’m very sorry to tell you that you have been switched to professional staff.”

“Yes, sir.” I stood and took my badge off my belt.

“I did everything I could, Kennedy.” He stood and walked around his desk. “Pack your desk and go up to floor 15. They’ll get you settled in there. I hope to see you after your vacation days are over.”

“I know you did. I’m just glad I’m still here. Thank you.” I gave him my badge, smiled and walked out.

At least I had a few days off from work before I really had to get settled in with the professional staff. I hadn’t told anyone where I was going besides my best friend, Emily. But I was going to see Harry.

Before I could pack my desk up and go home to pack, I had to talk to Timothy. We had become very good friends and gone on a lot of missions, busts, and operations together so I knew he would be disappointed.

“Hey Tim.” I sat on the edge of his desk as he looked up from his mountain of paperwork. Legalities, you know?

“Hey what’s up? Why’d you have to go into the boss’s office? Did you get fired because of your prince?” He joked.

“First off, we’ve talked about you calling him ‘my prince.’ Second, I wasn’t fired but I was unfortunately moved to professional staff. I gotta leave this floor and department. Security issues. I’m sorry I’m not your partner anymore.” I explained.

“Oh Beau, I’m sorry!” He stood and hugged me. “This just means we can hang out outside of work and not be sick of each other from working together.”

“Yeah. I guess. I just hate leaving. I’m a special agent. It’s took me a good few years to get to this position. And I hate that because who I’m just casually seeing affects my work.” We let go from the hug. “And the people on 15 gossip. And I’m a target for gossip right now. Divorced and met Harry. I’m gonna be stuck in a horrible cubicle with people who are gonna give a load of paperwork for something petty. Money laundering or something. I bust people, that’s what I do best.”

“Well we’re always getting papers from staff that helps us with operations and backgrounds. Maybe you’ll be doing background checks and investigations into some of our people.” I followed him as we went into our inventory room and got a box for my things.

“I guess. I just feel like I could be helping in a bigger way. But you’re right. And I guess this gives me more time to get to know Harry.” I spoke softly as we asked to my desk.

“Ohhh so you do like him!”

“Tim, we’re getting to know each other.”

“So those make out sessions you had while he was in town, those were just friendly? Because I don’t usually do that with someone I’m casually getting to know.” As witty as he was, he was right. I really liked Harry. But that was a conversation for my best friend. And in the future, Harry.

We talked as we packed up my minimal items from my desk. My plant, stationery, picture frame of my niece, Eleanor, and nephew, James, and my coffee mug.

Timothy went with me up the elevator and to an empty desk on floor 15.

“I’ll miss you. Don’t forget about me.” I said dramatically, setting my stuff down.

“We can get drinks tonight?” He sympathetically rubbed my arm.

“Oh I can’t. I have 5 days off. Going out of town. But when I get back, we are definitely getting drinks.”

“Are you going to see your family or to see a certain someone?” He smirked.

“I’m going to see a certain someone but this is confidential. You tell absolutely no one. I don’t need anymore paparazzi following more than there already are. And the ones across the pond.”

“I hear they’re vicious over there. I wouldn’t get to close to your prince. Look what happened to Diana.”

“Timothy, you’re being silly. They’re harsh but I can take it. Besides, we’re not even actually together.”

“Just a warning. I’ll see ya later. Have fun in England.” We said our goodbyes and he went back to his floor.

I unpacked my stuff, said hello to a few members of the staff, and was on my way home.

After I got down the elevator and outside, I tried to find my phone in my purse along with juggling my my jacket and coffee tumbler.

I put my phone to my ear after I found who I was searching for in my contacts.

“Hey, what’re you doing?” Harry answered.

I smiled. His voice had started to give me butterflies but also be so soothing.

“I just got out of work. There’s good news and bad news regarding work. Which would you like first?” I hailed a cab and got in while I spoke.

I told the driver my address and sat back to talk to Harry.

“Bad news?”

“Bad news to me. My boss told me that I was being moved to professional staff. I’m no longer a special agent. Had to hand in my badge and everything. It was devastating. I worked so long and hard to get that position.”

“Babe, I’m so sorry. This is my fault isn’t it?”

“No. It’s the media’s fault. They’ve been on my back since we met. I’ve started getting a ride to work versus walking. They’re like hyenas. They never leave.”

“Beau, this is my fault. I’m so sorry. I know how much your job means to you. But you said you have good news?” His voice tried to sound optimistic but I know he felt bad about all the press attention. He’s always apologizing for it.

“The good news is that with my new position, I work 4 days and then have a 3 day weekend each week. So I take that as a blessing in disguise. We can see each other a bit more.” I smiled more to myself than anything.

The cab came to a stop in front of my building. I looked and there were several people loitering out front with cameras. Oh god.

I quickly paid the driver and got out.

“Hang on H, there’s paps out front.” I said quietly.

I walked quickly through the crowd of them, bumping into them but not reacting. I just needed to get up to my apartment.

Arriving in the elevator, I quickly pressed the door close button to be alone.

“Okay, I’m back. In the elevator up to my place. Where were we?” I pressed the button of my floor.

“We were talking about your visit here. Would you like to meet my family? Like my brother or dad?”

My mouth dropped for a second. They’re royalty. I know Harry was royalty but it just didn’t feel like it. The way we met was so normal.

“Would you like me to? Is it too early? I’d love to but I’m scared, I don’t know what I would even wear?”

“I’d love for you too. I see a real future with you. And I know they would love to meet you with as much as I’ve talked about you.”

“Awe, you’ve talked about me?” I smiled as I unlocked my door and walked in.

“Absolutely. I’ll call William and Catherine and tell them we’ll have dinner together if that’s okay?”

“Yes! What do I wear though?”

“Something normal. It’s just dinner.”

We stayed on the phone while I finished packing my bag.

It was spring in England but the weather was always weird there so hopefully i could find something that would be appropriate to meet Harry’s brother and sister in law in.

I packed a few makeup products, nothing excessive. I only wore brow product, mascara, and concealer on a normal day so that’s all I packed. I threw a lipstick in in case I wanted to feel fancy.

I was eventually done packing and needed to shower since I would be leaving soon.

“I’ll text you when I’m getting on the plane. And then I’ll see you soon.” I said to Harry.

“Okay. Be safe. I’ll see you then. I can’t wait to see you.”

I smiled to myself before I told him goodbye.

I quickly took a shower and got ready. I didn’t do anything to my hair since it was warm outside and it would dry quickly since it was barely at my shoulders.

After picking out an old FBI shirt I had from training and some nice leggings, I threw my sneakers on and a hat.

I grabbed my bag and headed out the door. I locked the door behind me.

Off to England.

Off to meet Prince William and Catherine.

[ellana-ravenwood]

“Are the Wayne kids single ?” - Batsis x Batfam

So...I am a shameless people watcher (don’t judge haha). I get a lot of inspiration from sitting somewhere for hours and just looking at strangers going on about their lives ^^'. Sometimes catching conversations and such and man, many people are borderline obsessed with knowing who their fav’ celebrity is dating and all that. Which made me think : “Mm, wonder if the members of the Batfam, who are definitely celebrities in their world, ever have problems with people borderline obsessing about their love life ? And how do they handle it ?” so um...I wrote about that. And here it is. Hope you’ll like it :  

PS : Since I don’t appear in the Tumblr searches anymore, reblogging my stories is the only way for other people than you guys who are following me to see them...so if you feel like helping out :D.  My master list blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives

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“(Y/N), we don’t have to if you don’t want to, you know.” 

“What ? What are you talking about ? Don’t be stupid, of course I want to. One of them will pick up on it at some point anyway, and then believe me, it’ll be much worse. It’s always better if it comes from us.”  

You wince at the tone of your own voice. 

You didn’t mean to sound so cold and a bit condescending, especially since you understood that he was just trying to help you, understanding that you were under a lot of stress and pressure.

He. 

Conner Kent. Your boyfriend. He has been yours for a while now, which was what this all thing was about in the first place. 

************

Growing up as a “Wayne” brought it’s fair share of advantages, and disadvantages.  

The good points were very obvious. No one needed to think much about the “Why being a Wayne is great ?” thing. Everyone knew the answer to that. Money, fame, doors opening for you easily etc etc.

The bad points though...Many people never realized there even were unpleasant sides of being a Wayne, the good points overshadowing this darker facet of your life. But what most people thought was a blessing, could be a real pain in the ass sometimes ! 

Having money brought its lot of “vulture” that wanted to be friend with you just because of this. Having a good network meant that people always assumed everything you ever earned through hard work was just handed to you. And being famous...

Oh, the fame was probably one of the biggest drawback of being a Wayne. Because being often in the spotlight meant that people could get absolutely obsessed with your every move. 

You were lucky enough to have a father who always managed to shield you (and your siblings) from all this when you were a kid...But now. 

Now you were an adult, and you couldn’t always rely on your dad to save you from paparazzi and such. Plus it came with the territory of being a Wayne. Your father prepared you long enough for that. 

He knew he wouldn’t always be able to protect you from the public eye. He knew that, just because you were his kid, at some point, you’d have to appear at events filled with journalists and photographers. 

And though he was able to bargain when you were a child to only have pictures he previously approved published (plus the law was on his side, as pictures of children appearing in magazines had specific rules to follow, and he had amazing lawyers)...Now that you were an adult, you had to fend for yourself. 

Otherwise, rumors would start. Bad rumors. Hurtful ones. 

Your dad taught you long ago that to keep the little privacy you had while famous, you had to give a little first. Or things could turn sour. He could talk from experience, he had some scandals in his youth (one of them being suddenly becoming a single dad while in his early twenties, while being back in Gotham for less than a year after his mysterious disappearance when he was 16, and always refusing to talk about who was your mother um um.This sprout some pretty terrible rumors in its days...But that’s another story).

The trick was to give away enough so that people would be satisfied, without actually saying much. It was important to give them something to chew on. They’d just write something about you anyway, just because of who your family was so...Hinting on things cheekily and with humor came a long way. 

Like for example, what your dad always did in regards of women and his relationships. He build himself a “womanizer” persona and always played the part perfectly, so questions about a potential “Mrs Wayne” died down a while ago. 

Nowadays, he just  had to smile charmingly, wink and say “A gentleman never tells” to any question about his current supposed “conquest”, and everyone would be satisfied. 

And oh there were so many pictures and videos of you, standing behind him as he uses his charms to swoon everyone, and rolling your eyes at the all thing. 

In fact, Tim pointed out to you a while ago an instagram account someone made called “(Y/N) Wayne’s sassy eye roll”. It was filled with videos of you rolling your eyes in public (mainly at something your brothers or father did). This account had over two millions followers when he showed it to you, and probably gained more since then. Which wasn’t really surprising. 

Actually, this little dynamic you had with your dad, him (faking) being an extroverted flirty man, and you shaking your head whenever he did that...people loved it. And more than once, you got out of a delicate question someone asked because your dad used his charm and you acted embarrassed and “so done with it” that it made people laugh and move on, without even needing an answer ! 

Implying things without ever confirming them was key in a lot of situations. And using humor and quick come backs was too. 

When people were being rudely intrusive, and asked questions about your personal life, it was easy to shut them down. To answer with wit and sarcasm, and make them want to stop asking you this kind of questions. Plus the public LOVED a good little drama and to see rude ones being put back in their place.

Most of your “fans” were rooting for you, and wanted to know things about you because they somehow felt like you were their friends. Many of them saw you grow up by your father’s side. Your family always been a loved one in Gotham. So...If someone was being an ass to you, of course they’d yell “YAAS QUEEN !!” and talk about how well you answered, not caring about the actual question anymore even if they were curious. 

Yes. Dealing with rude scandal journalists was easy. 

But sometimes, oh sometimes...Sometimes you fell on a nice reporter who didn’t think what they did was wrong in any way, and who was just genuinely curious. Who just wanted to give actual infos to their followers. 

After all, you were a “celebrity” just for being born a “Wayne”. And though you never asked for this fame, it came with some sort of contract that you kinda had to talk about your private life from times to times. 

Which was your biggest problem currently. You weren’t really sure how to go about...All this. 

You’ve always been good for getting away from questions about your love life, by feeding journalists little anecdotes about your relationship with your dad, or funny stories involving your siblings. By deflecting their questions to give them some other hindsight about your life. 

Plus your use of social media, especially Instagram and Snapchat, also helped you get away with a lot. You showed enough, so that people wouldn’t be too curious. 

But you knew that a day would arise that you’d need to actually spill the tea...”Were the Wayne kids single, or not ?”

************

Go figure why, but this question : “Are the Wayne kids single ?”, was always only aimed at you. No one ever asked your brothers. You wondered if it was because you were the only girl, and people just instantly assume you liked talking about “love” and shit ? Damn gender cliches. 

Maybe it was the reason. But clearly, they were wrong. 

“Love and shit”. Just the way you were thinking about it could give every answer needed. For a long time, you didn’t care much about relationships. 

Even more so since, you being a Wayne, it was difficult to meet guys you could trust for being genuinely interested in you, and not just your name. Plus you simply never felt the need to be with someone to be happy. It didn’t came first on your priority list. 

It actually never even was, on your priority list. 

You were busy with so many other things, you never thought you really needed to have someone involved in that way in your life. 

Plus, maybe, just maybe, the fact your father and mother had a complicated on/off relationship kinda made you afraid of any kind of romantic commitment. 

Batman and Catwoman’s mouse and cat chase was infamous. You didn’t want to ever feel the way they did and still do. You saw more than once, how miserable they could get because of all that. Of course, they had just as much happy moments but...Meh. You’d rather just avoid it. 

Which is why you always seemed to know how to avoid questions about your love life ! You decided long ago that you wouldn’t go the “helpless flirt” way your dad took, and rather borrow the “funny self-deprecating jokes” road. 

You’d just brush off any rumors concerning you and a potential love interest with this kind of humor, and then talk about something else involving your family life. 

And that was it. Easy. Plus anyway, there really wasn’t that much to talk about. 

You were single. You were glad to be single. You didn’t want to get involved with anyone. End of story (and you knew this wouldn’t satisfy anyone’s curiosity which is why you often retorted to deflecting things). 

It was all rather simple and straightforward. 

That was your mindset. Until you met Conner. 

Things changed after that. And though you went through quite a lot of misunderstanding (I wrote stories about this, you can check them out on my master list on the DC one under “Conner” @ella-ravenwood-archives​), in the end, things were great between you two ! 

Actually getting rather...Serious. Which is what got you in that particular mood you were today. What made you somewhat snap at your beloved boyfriend. 

************

You knew. You just knew that the info would come out eventually. And not knowing when or how was getting you on edge. 

It’s not that you didn’t want to present Conner as your “official” boyfriend. Not that you were ashamed of him or unsure about your relationship. It’s just...getting this kind of thing in the open wasn’t easy. 

You were dreading all the questions about how you met (you couldn’t possibly talk about the truth, and the Young Justice, and coming up with a believable story you could both say was weirdly incredibly stressful), how things were going, wether or not you thought about marriage, living together...kids ! 

This was a step in your privacy you weren’t sure you wanted anyone to cross. And yet...Yet it HAD to be made public ! Because god forbid one of those rude scandal journalists find the truth before you talked about it. 

You could be sure it would bring its lot of rumors and unpleasant things like that. You didn’t want anyone to talk ill about you and Conner dating !! You knew it could really have a bad effect on your relationship...

You witnessed your oldest brother, Dick, and his first fall out with his first girlfriend, Barbara, because the public pressure was too much. Now of course they had other issues and after a lot of things happening managed to work things out and were back together for good (they went through too much together not to), but you didn’t want to go through any of that ! You spend enough nights trying to cheer your older brother up after his break-up, and listening to how things got awful once people started to talk about them...

You already went through so much, with Conner. Convincing your families to accept your relationship was tough for many reasons. You definitely didn’t need some noisy people to speculate about why you didn’t go public or anything...

Which is why you needed to do it now. By yourself. But you just didn’t really know how to...go on about all of that ! 

“(Y/N), we don’t have to if you don’t want to, you know.”

“What ? What are you talking about ? Don’t be stupid, of course I want to. One of them will pick up on it at some point anyway, and then believe me, it’ll be much worse. It’s always better if it comes from us.”  

You wince at the tone of your own voice.

You didn’t mean to sound so cold and a bit condescending, especially since you understood that he was just trying to help you, understanding that you were under a lot of stress and pressure.

You turn to him and smile apologetically, before adding :

“Besides, I think it’s finally time I show you off.” 

Oh it was so easy to make Conner blush. Any compliments coming from you and his cheeks would get that cute rosy tint. You were about to reach for his cheek and caress it lovingly, to complete your not-so-subtile “I’m sorry I was just being an ass” excuse when, as often, your fun and enjoyment at witnessing your boyfriend being so sweet was cut short by...one of your sibling, of course (they always seemed to be around when such moments happened...well today you were visiting the family home, so obviously they’d be there, but still). 

“Tt. There’s not much to show off really !” 

Your youngest brother starts, sneering at Conner. 

Your boyfriend got accustomed to this kind of behavior a while ago now, and only answered with a smirk which Damian thought was absolutely infuriating ! But he didn’t dare say or do much more, because you were now glaring at him and he just knew you too well to risk any other words. Before you could scold him however, your other younger brother, Tim, said : 

“Well, technically speaking, there IS a lot to show. Conner is a, and I’m quoting dad talking about him to one of the Justice League about wether or not he should be one of its new member : “big and able strong man”...bit redundant really. Now, if we speak about conversation and brain...”

Tim snickered, aware of what not finishing his sentence implied, and exchanged a knowing look with Damian. The high-five they gave each others a few seconds after almost stopped you from saying anything. After all, it was so rare to see him bond like that...You just wished it wasn’t in this circumstance. Which made you say : 

“First of all, Conner is a very intelligent man, Mister I-thought-fish-fingers-could-be-found-like-that-in-the-sea-and-were-actually-fingers. And second, he’s also a rather attractive one. So there’s a lot to show off, and you’re just being jealous.”

Damian made an exaggerated gagging sound at you calling your boyfriend “attractive”, but didn’t say anything else (your glare always had such an effect on him), but Tim exclaimed, outraged : 

“Hey ! I was kidding ok ? No need to bring out the jealousy card ! And about the fish fingers, I was seven and you and Jason kept telling me that I was right !” 

You smiled smugly at him, happy you managed to turn the tables on him, and...wow it feels nice. To joke around with your brothers, even if you’re not so sure they’re really joking when talking about your Conner. It was just nice to forget your stress a bit. Nice to think about something else. 

 You came to the realization you HAD to talk about your relationship publicly today, as you were coming home from the Kent farm with Conner and almost got caught by paparazzi. Thanks Gods for Wayne Manor’s high hedges and the fact that from behind and far away, your boyfriend could very well be one of your brother, what with his large frame and dark hair...

But this little event of you two almost getting caught made you realize that you had to go public. You had to introduce Conner to everyone. Because if you didn’t, the truth would eventually come out and it’d just be bad overall. A source of unwanted and easily avoidable troubles. 

You were talking about this all morning with your family, and they were definitely very supportive and agreed with you. You had to talk about it...

Which is why you spend most of your day stressing about it and trying to think about a strategy to bring the subject as smoothly as possible. And so, this little joking distraction was very welcome. 

Your dad’s chuckle finished to make you feel more at ease. It was very rare, to hear him laugh, and when he did, it always had a big soothing effect on you. Even if there was a possibility he was currently mocking you, you couldn’t care less. 

He laughed, and you liked when he was happy and carefree enough to do so. 

You turn to him and he smiles fondly at you. Raising you hadn’t really been the easiest thing for many reasons (none related to your personality or way of being, on the contrary...but that’s another story), and seeing you all grown up brought a special emotion to his heart. 

Seeing you stressed about introducing your relationship to the public made him feel so many different things. 

Nostalgia that you weren’t his little girl anymore. Pride that you grew up so well despite all the hardship you went through, and was such an amazing young woman. Sadness and guilt that it’s only because he was your dad that you had to go through all those troubles (and many more). Happiness because you seemed happy, albeit a bit stressed. Resentment, mainly towards Conner, because he was taking you away... 

His chuckle came from you shutting up Tim with that “fish fingers” comment (and because he was reminded of how cute it was, that arguably his smartest kid was also the most gullible one as a child...oh how you and Jason took advantage of that fact. You also managed to make him believe that the hay wrapped in white plastic in fields were actually giant marshmallows, and that those candy Tim particularly liked were plants), but also because seeing you so worked up over something he never thought you’d even think about much was entertaining. 

You often knew exactly what you wanted and how to achieve it. So the fact you were so unsure right now, about such a trivial thing as to introduce your boyfriend to the “World”...it was oddly funny to him. 

Hence the chuckle. And his next words : 

“I remember being nervous too, when I was about to announce that I was seriously dating your mother.” 

You smile at him and...Oh no. Of course. Of course you were going to turn the tables on him too and try to divert this whole issue : 

“Which time ?” 

Constantly joking about your parents on and off relationship (currently off) was your way to cope with the fact you’d never have quite conventional parents (well, as they said themselves : “they dress as animals at night”, obviously they couldn’t be “normal”). To compensate your fear of having their kind of painful yet exciting relationship (even if clearly, between you and Conner it was completely different  than between them). 

Your dad knew you weren’t quite mocking him, but just teasing. Which is what he wanted to achieve. If you teased him, it meant you were a bit less stressed. 

“When we got engaged. -short pause - The first time.” 

He answers your question, his face stoic even if you know he’s not taking all this too seriously (the fact he added “the first time” proof enough). You smirk and...it always impressed you very much, how your dad always seemed to know what to say to calm you down. 

After all, he was known to be a bit “challenged” when it came to express himself, or his feelings. But for some reasons, he just always know what to say to make his kids feel better. His magic didn’t work only on you, you knew for a fact that in moments of doubts, he always managed to cheer your brothers up to. To bring them back from dark thoughts. 

He knew what it felt like to be miserable, sad, lost and any negative feeling you could think of...And the mere thoughts of his children feeling any of that pained him so much that he always ended up letting his guard down, and letting his heart speak. 

It was always very effective. Like now. 

Even if very simple. Just a few words. You already felt better, more cool headed. Less nervous. More encline to think properly and not panic.

In fact, the way your dad just joked about his own nervousness (and knowing that he had to then announce that his engagements were off which was even worst...) made you see the entire situation in another light. 

You smiled widely at your dad, then at Conner. Ignored your two pouty little brothers who were still vexed about how you easily turned tables on them, and suddenly stood up to go get your phone. 

Conner looked at you, curious, as you came trotting back to him. Your dad, however, knew what this meant. He recognized the little spark in your eyes. He saw it enough to know instantly what it meant. 

You just had an amazing idea to solve your problem. 

************

Thanks to your dad joking around and therefor helping your mind be more at ease, you were able to foment a little plan as to how would be the best way to bring the news about you having a serious boyfriend. 

You didn’t want to directly come forward with him and say you guys were steady already. You knew that if you did, many people would wonder how long you got together. And the answer to that question would bring too much annoyances. 

If you said the truth, that you’ve been together for almost a year, then people would get vexed that you only just introduced him, even if technically, it was none of their business. They would wonder why they never saw him on any of your social media pages. 

They would talk about why you waited so long before introducing him, and even if your reason was to “make sure things were serious” which was valid, they’d find a way to twist your words, and you didn’t want Conner to think anything of it. You knew he wasn’t one to be easily manipulated, but if problems could be avoided...Then you should avoid them, right ? 

On the other hand, if you said “oh we just got together”, then people would annoyingly give your relationship an “end date” and talk about how you introduced him officially way too fast ! Again, he never even appeared on your instagram !

No. No. Rule number 1 of being famous : give a little info, just enough to satisfy people’s curiosity. Don’t give away too much at the same time, or things will go haywire. 

The biggest problem right now, was that people never even heard of Conner. How would they ? You met while at the Young Justice headquarters. You rarely had the time to go on “conventional” date and even so, you’d then go in places you were sure no one would recognize you (like in Smallville and such). 

You had to first ease him in. Talk about him a bit. Introduce him as a “friend”, before talking about “boyfriend”. So that people wouldn’t be shock. So that they’d slowly get accustomed to him. 

And how to do that ? Well, social media came in handy for sure. 

First, Conner started to appear in your “group pictures”. The one you would take with your brothers, to satisfy the “Wayne fix” people seemed to need. The caption on that first picture of you, Conner and your brothers was : “Hanging with those guys <3 #bestbrothersever #lookatthoseidiots #Waynefam″, as simple as that. 

You replied to a few comments of people wondering who “That dude on the left of Jason” was by replying a simple : “He’s a friend of my brother !” 

It was quite clever really. Bam. Conner was in as “your brother’s friend” (never mentioning which brother was smart, people just assumed it was Dick or Jason and that was it, even if technically, he was Tim’s bestie). And the fact you personally replied to some comments made you closer from the people who wanted to know all about you ! It was a win-win situation. 

Then slowly, he started to appear in your snapchat stories and such. Like “My brother’s friend is a dork”, filming him doing something silly with one of your sibling. 

And bit by bit, he took more space on your social medias. He went from an “unnamed man in your picture”, to “your brother’s friend”, to simply “Conner”. 

The first picture you posted of just you and him had so many comments from people saying things like : “I don’t know for y’all, but I ship them !” or “Oh they’d be a cute couple !” even before you’d hint at anything. 

Literally, this said first picture was of you and him in Metropolis’ streets, picture taken a little blurry on purpose, as if you’d just met by accident. 

The caption read : “Look who I ran into into in Metro-city ! #ConnerK #Thatdork #Mybrosfriend #coincidence”. It was simple, and enough for people to start kinda liking the idea of the two of you together. 

Of course by then, you’d really been together for literal months, but eh, no one but your families and close friends knew. The fact was, you guys dating was part of your “unknown world”. Part of your “superhero World”. You hung out together at the Young Justice headquarters at first. But now it was time for Conner to come and be part of your “Alter Ego” world. 

You posted another picture of you and Conner the same day you “accidentally” ran into each others in Metropolis, of him sitting next to you in a park, an ice cream in his hand, smiling charmingly at the camera. With a caption saying : “Thanks for showing me around dude ! Glad our path crossed #coincidence #Iwaslost #GladIranintohim #mybrothersfriendsarealsomyfriends #suchlonghashtags #ConnerK #icecreamtime #MetropolisSucks”. 

From that point on, it was easy to slowly ease into people’s mind that actually, they kinda like you two together. 

You denying any romantic relationship with him was another smart move. You’d sometimes say : “no he’s just a friend !” and such things whenever people shipped the hell out of you, which made people like and like even more the idea of you two dating. 

You got the inspiration from watching too many TV shows. You know, those incredible slow burn love stories ? Where the lead character has that perfect chemistry with another recurring character, and since their first scene together you’ve been wanting them to date ? But things drag and drag and problem keeps getting in their way and suddenly you would DIE for them ! You are rooting for them to get together soooo bad ! That once they finally do...You’re just incredibly happy, and since you feel like you just witnessed their relationship blossomed for the past three seasons, you don’t mind not having all the answers to your questions about them together, ya know ? 

On the contrary, you want things to keep unfold in front of you. 

Well, you basically applied that TV show trope you love so much to your own fake un-relationship. Posting more and more things with Conner. Cute “friendly” videos, and awesome pictures. 

Conner even started to use his own instagram page, that he never really used before. The message he wrote for you for your birthday, accompanied by a cute picture of you smiling at the camera made so many people write in caps lock “JUST GET TOGETHER ALREADY !”. 

Your plan was going perfectly well. Your father was actually very impressed and proud about how you decided to handle everything. From extremely nervous, to a neatly and skilled little plan coming perfectly together. 

In that way, you were a lot like him. Always had a plan. And multiple back up plans. Only most of the time, your initial plans would almost always work. 

Like father like daughter, right ? 

************

You were so damn proud of yourself. And so happy Conner understood. 

You were perfectly aware that your “plan” could be misinterpreted by him. After all, he could’ve been weirded out by all the “faking” you asked of him. But nope. He really wasn’t. 

You explained to him that you thought that easing things down would be the best and more problem free way to go. That acting as if you weren’t already together since a long time was a good idea. 

You explained all the rumors that could ensue if you just came out together now without saying anything (you could see such rumors every day in scandal magazines, as soon as a celebrity was hanging out with someone else !). 

And he understood. He agreed. Plus, he didn’t mind acting like your friend in public. So far, you both always kinda hid yourself wherever you went together.

So for Conner it was a great change of pace. Even if he definitely understood too why until now you wanted to keep your relationship hidden. You just wanted to be with him without any other worries, to be with him as if you were just a random person, not someone famous ! Plus he knew you were afraid to impose your fame on him, but now, you’ve been together long enough for him to accept that fact, for him to know he’ll eventually have to roll with it if he wanted to be with you...Oh and he wanted to.

He never thought you were ashamed of him, or not serious or anything. No. He understood why you wanted to hide things. He was totally on board. He was actually pretty sure he would have waited centuries for you to be ready ! And now that you were, that he was too, and moving forward with things...Well then he’d do whatever you want him to do. 

He was never into PDA anyway, and it was nice to be able to hang out with you in public without caring much if people took pictures or not. Because it was known that he was “just one of your brother’s friend” at first, so there was no mystery there ! People knew him now. And even started to point out how he appeared before in your brothers’ pictures anyway !

And then once you started to hang out more as friends yourselves, and all that...as your PUBLIC relationship started to bud...Well who cared if paparazzi took picture and titled their articles : “Are (Y/N) Wayne and Conner Kent dating ?!”

To be honest, it was quite a big help that Conner was “Clark Kent and Lois Lane’s kid”. It eased even more your fake backstory of how you met. It was notoriously known that Bruce Wayne was good friend with famed reporters Kent and Lane. So the fact their children knew each others...wasn’t really surprising ! 

It played perfectly in your little “he was just one of my brother’s friend. I never saw him as more than a play buddy for a long time...until that fateful Metropolis encounter !”. Oh Alfred’s acting class he used to give you as a child definitely came in handy ! 

************

“So, serious question...Are the Wayne kids single, or not ? There has been rumors lately !” 

You managed to pull a bashful smile that was completely fabricated but that everyone would think was genuine. You became quite good, at faking facial expression in public. “Thanks dad”. 

You knew exactly why, this time, they asked you this question. A few days earlier, you gave an anonymous tips to some paparazzi that “the famed (Y/N) Wayne and her rumored boyfriend Conner Kent had been spotted on Gotham’s docks, having a romantic promenade”. 

You let them take pictures of you quickly kissing Conner, as if you were actually afraid someone would catch you. You and Conner played the part perfectly, acting as if this was your first date or something. All shy and small touches. 

You planned for this event for months. It was the culminating point of everything. The time when finally, things would change. And you were so glad that the journalist to ask you this tonight, was one of the few you actually liked. With a charming smile you say : 

“Oh well you know I rarely talk about that, Miss Torres.” 

Gabriela Torres, a famous EW journalist smiles knowingly but insist. She would usually never do that, but there is some pretty incriminating pictures of you and a certain Metropolis boy... 

“A Metropolis boy you say ? No idea who you are mentioning.” 

You say coyly, and you know they’re falling right in your trap. For this little stunt of admitting you’re in a relationship, your brothers gave you permission to talk about their love life. Briefly. 

“I can tell you however that my brother Dick’s wedding to Barbara Gordon is starting to coming up nicely. That Jason is most definitely following in my dad’s footstep. That Tim is still with his high school sweetheart, Steph’ and um...Well, Damian is only fourteen ! I think he’s barely interested in any kind of romance right now. I’m sure he has crushes but...uh, you know.” 

They didn’t really know, but acted as if they did. Because you had a way with words, that just made people satisfied enough. Just like your dad. Plus, they weren’t really interested in your brothers right now, they knew you were just deflecting. 

Gabriela Torres asks once more about that “Metropolis boy”, but this time, she names him. 

“Isn’t there something going on between you and Conner Kent ?” 

You manage to fake being bashful once again. You turn away from the camera. Laugh a little bit nervously, and then turn back to the journalist and say : 

“Well, a proper lady never tells.” 

You then proceed to smile and wink in a very Bruce Wayne-way (again, like father, like daughter) and walk away. 

And you’ve done it. Gave them just enough so they’ll be satisfied, but not enough to truly invade your personal life. 

Conner’s officially in. 

************

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t feeling nervous at all when you brought your boyfriend to an official and formal event for the first time. 

And oh man Conner ? Conner was almost throwing up because of how nervous he was. But here you were, walking the red carpet under a hundred of camera flashes. And it was time. 

“(Y/N) Wayne isn’t single anymore, it’s official”. 

************

“Wow, well. This went better than expected ! They really like you Kon !” 

“Yeah ? I was afraid I messed things up a bit by being so nervous...” 

“Oh no, I think they loved that. It brings a certain quirk to you. And it shows you care about making a good impression...You can bet that tomorrow, people will be all over the papers about me being hitched ! And the next day, they’ll forget all about it because then they’ll focus on the fact that there’s, potentially, three Wayne kids that are still single...So all in all, very successful evening !” 

This was such a relief. Finally. Finally he was “officially” your boyfriend, and you’d never have to hide anymore. Awesome. Things really went smoothly ! People truly LOVED Conner. 

And you were all pretty sure it was thanks to your plan of easing things down. When you finally presented Conner as your boyfriend, people felt like they knew him too, after all those videos and pictures and such you posted. 

They had been shipping you two since “way before you guys started dating” (something people often said, and that amused you often, given the fact you celebrated your first year anniversary while you were still not “officially” together), and were glad to see you two making things official. The “I ship them so hard” comment were now replaced by “#relationshipgoals” and other “THE SHIP HAS SAILED !!” and such. 

Wow. Well. Why were you nervous in the first place ? 

************

And here you were again, nervous beyond all measure, unable to stop playing with the new piece of jewelry on your ring finger...

Conner asked you to marry him months ago, but it was only now that you had time to truly announce it to the World. Your family and friends already knew of course, but your “public alter ego” had to still come out clean about that. 

The day before the gala you were going to, Conner posted on HIS social medias (sounded more logical) a simple picture of the ring on your finger, your hand holding his, and a caption saying : “She said yes <3″. 

The post broke the internet. 

It became one of instagram’s most liked pictures. And people couldn’t wait for your official statement the next day at the gala...And here you were, nervous again even if you knew most people knew already and you just had to confirm things, to “give them the little infos so they could be satisfied”. 

************

“Wow, well. This went better than expected ! They really really like you Kon !” 

“Yeah well, I think I figured that out by now. I do receive the occasional hate online about “not being good enough for you” but I’m pretty sure all those accounts are Damian’s...” 

You snort, but start to genuinely laugh when your little brother gives a half-joking “Tt, not ALL of them”. 

You’re on your way home to your apartment, and as often during official galas like so, you’re in the family car as you all went to the event together. Of course. 

You, Jason and Dick didn’t live in the Manor anymore, but Alfred and your dad always made a point to pick you up so you’d all go as a family. It was important for them, but also for that public image you kept up all those years, of you guys being a very close family (which was true anyway). 

People LOVED when the entire Wayne family went somewhere. They always went completely crazy for pictures of all of you together, which unfortunately were rarer nowadays than they used to. Which made said picture all the more appreciated. 

You finish laughing at your brother’s (half) joke and Conner smiles as you lay your head on his chest, closing your eyes, exhausted after tonight’s emotions and commotion. 

There’s a small silence as Alfred drives the family limousine back to your apartment to drop you and Conner off first, as your home is closer to the city center than Dick’s and Jason’s. And definitely closer than Wayne Manor, where your dad, Tim and Damian will go back after dropping all of you off. 

It’s a comfortable silence. Everyone is very please about how the entire evening went. Your dad would never admit it, but he was really happy and proud that you were going to marry a man such as Conner Kent. 

The silence is broken by said man :

“I wonder what people’s reaction will be when we’ll tell them you’re pregnant...” 

Conner says, before he freezes and a horrified expression slowly creeps on his face. Did he just...Drop that bomb ? While you and him only discovered that fact the day before ? And didn’t say anything to your family yet ? Oh my god, you were going to be so mad at him ! 

But you were already asleep, comfortably nestled on his chest, and your boyfriend, future father of your child...Had to bear the glares your brothers laid on him, the furious shock in your father’s eyes. 

He had to ignore the gasp they all made, the way they refrained themselves from yelling because you were asleep and it was rare for you to get any of that, especially so peacefully. The way they “yelled” silent “WHAT ?!” and threw their hand in the air, the scene being utterly comic, as they tried to make as little noise as possible. 

The way your brothers weren’t sure wether they were happy or mad. The way your dad’s glass of water he had in his hand shattered as he gripped it. The way his expression went from “angry” to “wait, what, I’m going to be a grandfather ?” to finally land on “I’m happy ! But also, how dare you touch my daughter that way ?”. 

And all the while, you slept peacefully, not knowing that this novel piece of news that stressed you out was now out in the open to your family. You had just barely started to foment a plan about how to tell them ! 

For Conner, the ride back to your apartment was a very awkward one. And he blessed the fact that you didn’t wake up as you arrived home, meaning he didn’t have to witness your grumpy self awaking to your family asking you a thousand questions about your pregnancy ! 

He exited the car slowly, making sure to not wake you up, and mouthed a “I guess we’ll talk tomorrow...” to your brothers and father, smiling awkwardly at them, closing the car’s door. Worst timing EVER. And it was a bit surreal, to see their frustrated face realizing they’d really have to wait for tomorrow to ask for an explanation, as the door slowly closed on them. 

At least the good thing about all that, was the fact that you were deeply asleep and unaware of his mistake. That way, he had time to think of something to tell you, of a plan to break the news to you that he accidentally might have slip the fact that you were bearing his child to your family...

Damn. 

_______________________________________________

Sorry it took me a while to get that story out. I just got extremely busy with life lately...So. Yeah. I had ZERO time to write. Anyway, glad I could finally post this :). As usual, the initial idea I had changed quite a bit along the way, and I ended up focusing on Batsis/Conner more than on the Batsibling as a whole (don’t worry, there’ll be more bat siblings story related, and only them :)), but eh, that happens. I always end up getting carried away by the story.

Hope you liked it (???), don’t hesitate to leave a feedback and reblog, it’s always BEYOND appreciated (motivates to write more and all). Hope you weren’t disappointed or something and...yeah. That’s pretty much it *proud for once I didn’t comment on how insecure I am posting a story*.