#i am so sorry in advance to my therapist this week

[connectingconstellations]

Hi the world sucks and I have to stay off all my other social media because it's flooded with graphic images showing how much it sucks so send me some happy things please

[sanamet]

🪙

[reidmarieprentiss]

Short Shorts & Long Hair 2

Summary: Spencer and his physical therapist enjoy their new relationship.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x PT fem!reader

Category: fluff, smut (18+)

Warnings/Includes: smut (18+) additional warnings under the cut, suggestive content & conversation, alcohol consumption, feelings talks, trying on clothes in front of spencer, drunk sexual advances (not acted on)

Word count: 9.7k

a/n: i am so so so sorry this took me forever to get out -- honestly it has been done for over a week i just couldn't decide if i wanted to add more or not :/// i like where it leaves off though!

main masterlist part one

Additional warnings: oral (male receiving)

Spencer was immersed in his work, his focus completely on the files spread out in front of him, when a familiar voice cut through the usual hum of the bullpen.

“Can you point me to Doctor Reid, please?”

His head snapped up instantly, the sound of your voice pulling him from his thoughts. There you were, standing just a few feet away, looking absolutely stunning in your work attire that was professional yet irresistibly appealing. Spencer’s heart skipped a beat as he took in the sight of you, his surprise evident on his face.

“Y/N!” he exclaimed, a mixture of delight and shock coloring his tone. “What are you doing here?”

You smiled warmly, holding up a couple of bags filled with what looked like takeout containers. “Bringing my two favorite geniuses some lunch,” you said as you walked over, the easy confidence in your stride making Spencer’s heart race just a little faster.

Before Spencer could respond, Derek Morgan’s voice rang out from across the room. “Reid, you gonna introduce us?” Derek asked, his trademark smirk firmly in place as he leaned back in his chair, clearly amused by the unexpected visit.

Spencer felt a flush creep up his neck as he turned to face Derek. “Uh, yeah, of course,” he stammered slightly, trying to regain his composure. “Derek, this is Y/N, my—well, she’s… she’s a physical therapist.”

Derek raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening as he caught onto the hesitation in Spencer’s voice. “A physical therapist, huh?” he said, clearly intrigued. “Nice to meet you, Y/N. Any friend of Reid’s is a friend of mine.”

You chuckled, extending a hand to Derek. “Nice to meet you too, Derek. Spencer hasn’t mentioned a thing about you.”

Derek laughed loudly, clearly amused. “I like you already. I hope you give him a hard time.”

You smiled, relishing the easy banter. “Every chance I get, but for now, I’m here to make sure he’s well-fed and not skipping any meals.”

Spencer, still a bit flustered, managed a smile as he glanced between you and Derek. “Thanks for the lunch, Y/N,” he said, his voice softer now, filled with appreciation. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to,” you replied, your eyes meeting his with a warmth that made his heart flutter. “Besides, I needed an excuse to see you.”

Derek let out a low whistle, clearly enjoying the interaction. “Reid, you’ve been holding out on us,” he teased. “How come you never told us about your very generous, very attractive physical therapist?”

Spencer’s blush deepened, the rosy hue spreading across his cheeks, but he couldn’t help the small, shy smile that tugged at his lips. “I, uh… she’s not my physical therapist anymore,” he admitted, his voice faltering slightly.

Derek’s smirk widened, sensing an opportunity. “No? Then what is she, pretty boy?” he asked, his tone teasing but curious.

Spencer paled at the question, his mind racing for a response, but before he could stammer out an answer, Penelope’s voice cut through the tension, saving him from the awkwardness.

“Y/N! What are you doing here, gorgeous?” Penelope exclaimed as she entered the bullpen, her vibrant presence instantly lightening the mood.

You turned to greet her, grateful for the timely interruption. “Just bringing some lunch for my favorite geniuses,” you replied with a bright smile, embracing Penelope as she reached you.

Penelope grinned, giving you a quick hug before turning her gaze toward Spencer and Derek, her eyes twinkling with mischief. “Well, isn’t this a delightful surprise! You boys better be on your best behavior—Y/N’s practically family now.”

Spencer let out a quiet sigh of relief, silently thanking Penelope for diverting the conversation. He wasn’t sure how he would have explained what was happening between you two—mostly because he was still figuring it out himself.

—

At your regular wine and painting night, you and Penelope had indulged a little more in the wine and a little less in the painting. The vibrant colors on your canvases were more the result of playful brush strokes than any serious artistic endeavor, and the conversation had turned increasingly lively.

“So… how is the good doctor between the sheets?” Penelope asked, her eyes sparkling with a mix of curiosity and wine-fueled boldness.

“Penny!” you admonished, feeling your cheeks flush as you playfully swatted at her arm.

Penelope pouted, clearly unbothered by your reaction. “I need details! He won’t tell me anything.”

You sighed, trying to figure out how to navigate this without giving too much away. “There’s not much to tell…”

Penelope’s face fell, her concern evident as she leaned in closer. “Oh no, are you two not doing well?” she asked, her tone suddenly serious.

“No, no, nothing like that,” you quickly reassured her, waving off her worries with a small laugh.

“Then what?” Penelope’s intoxicated brain wasn’t quite catching the subtle signals you were sending. She looked at you expectantly, waiting for an explanation.

You hesitated, biting your lip before finally mumbling, “We haven’t even kissed…”

“WHAT!” Penelope’s outburst was loud enough to draw the attention of the entire room, heads turning to look at you both.

You quickly reached out, grabbing her arm and whispering urgently, “Penny, shhh!”

Penelope clamped a hand over her mouth, her eyes wide as she realized she had caused a scene. The other attendees slowly returned to their own conversations, the moment passing, but not without a few lingering glances in your direction.

Penelope leaned in closer, her voice lowered but still insistent. “How have you not kissed yet?” she whispered, her curiosity undeterred by your attempts at discretion.

You sighed, feeling the weight of the question. “It’s just… complicated,” you explained softly. “We’ve been trying to figure things out, and we haven’t rushed anything.”

Penelope’s expression softened, her earlier excitement replaced by understanding. “You know, there’s no need to rush,” she said gently. “But when the time feels right, just go for it, okay? Spencer’s a good guy, and he really likes you.”

You nodded, appreciating her support despite her earlier outburst. “I know. I really like him too.”

Penelope smiled, giving your hand a reassuring squeeze. “Then it’ll happen when it’s meant to. But if you need a little push, you know who to call.”

You laughed, the tension easing as you clinked your wine glasses together. The conversation shifted back to lighter topics, but the words Penelope had spoken stayed with you, a reminder that sometimes, it’s okay to take the first step.

—

“Knock knock, doc,” you called out teasingly as you knocked on Spencer’s door. It was your first time at his apartment, and you could feel a mix of excitement and nerves bubbling up inside you. You’d seen him in so many different settings—at work, in the PT room—but this felt different, more personal.

On the other side of the door, Spencer was trying to calm his racing heart. He had never had a woman in his apartment who wasn’t a family member or a coworker, and the thought of you being in his space made him both anxious and thrilled. He took a deep breath before opening the door.

“Hi, Y/N,” he greeted, his voice soft, a shy smile playing on his lips.

You couldn’t help but notice the way he still managed to be a little shy around you, even after all those months of physical therapy and now a month of casually seeing each other. It was something you found endearing, a reminder of just how sweet and genuine he was.

“Hello, Doctor,” you replied with a warm smile, stepping inside as he moved aside to let you in.

Spencer’s apartment was exactly what you’d imagined—cozy and filled with books, papers, and little pieces of his life that reflected his brilliant mind. There was a slight scent of coffee lingering in the air, and the space felt inviting, even if it was clear he hadn’t had many visitors.

“Sorry if it’s a bit… cluttered,” Spencer said, rubbing the back of his neck nervously as he watched you take in your surroundings.

“Are you kidding? It’s perfect,” you reassured him, turning to face him with a genuine smile. “It’s very… you.”

Spencer chuckled softly, his shoulders relaxing slightly at your words. “I’m glad you think so. Can I get you something to drink? Tea? Coffee?”

“Tea sounds great,” you said, following him into the kitchen area, where he began to fuss with the kettle and tea bags.

As he busied himself with the tea, you couldn’t help but feel a warm sense of contentment. This was different from any of your previous encounters—more intimate, more real. It wasn’t just about seeing each other in public or sharing a meal; this was about being in each other’s space, learning more about each other in a way that felt deeper.

“So,” you said, leaning against the counter as he waited for the water to boil, “how come you’re still a little shy around me after all this time? I thought we were past that.”

Spencer glanced up at you, his cheeks flushing slightly as he shrugged. “I don’t know… I guess I’m just not used to this kind of thing,” he admitted, his honesty making your heart flutter. “I’ve never really done this before—having someone I care about in my home. It’s… new.”

You smiled, touched by his vulnerability. “Well, for what it’s worth, I’m really glad to be here. And there’s no need to be nervous.”

Spencer’s smile grew a little more confident as he poured the hot water into the teapot, the steam rising between you. “I’m glad you’re here too,” he said softly, meeting your gaze with those warm, earnest eyes that had drawn you in from the beginning.

You settled into the couch beside Spencer, the two of you sinking into a comfortable rhythm as you sipped your tea and chatted about everything and nothing. The atmosphere in his apartment was cozy and relaxed, a perfect backdrop for the easy conversation you were sharing. 

But there was something on your mind, something that had been lingering ever since your talk with Penelope. And now, sitting here with Spencer, the time felt right to bring it up.

“So, Doctor,” you began, a teasing lilt in your voice as you turned to face him more fully. “Can I ask you an awkward question?”

Spencer froze for a split second, his cup of tea hovering just below his lips. He glanced at you, a mix of curiosity and trepidation in his eyes. “Oh no,” he replied, trying to keep his tone light despite the slight edge of nervousness creeping in. “I suppose you can.”

You took a deep breath, deciding to just go for it. “You like me, right?”

Spencer blinked, clearly caught off guard by the directness of your question. His cheeks flushed slightly, but he nodded. “Ye—yes,” he stammered, his voice a little higher than usual.

“As in,” you continued, keeping your tone playful to ease the tension, “think I’m pretty, want to date me, take me home to meet your mom?”

Spencer’s eyes widened, and you could see the color rising in his face, turning his cheeks a deep shade of pink. “Uh huh,” he managed to mumble, his gaze flickering between you and his cup, as if he was trying to find a safe place to look.

You smiled, feeling a rush of affection for him, but also a bit of frustration at the unspoken distance that still lingered between you. “Then why haven’t we kissed?” you asked, your voice softening as you leaned in just a little closer.

Spencer’s face turned so red so fast that you almost laughed, but you held it in, not wanting to make him feel more uncomfortable than he already did. He set his cup down carefully, his hands suddenly feeling very empty and unsure of where to go.

“I, um…” Spencer started, his words stumbling over each other as he tried to form a coherent sentence. “I just… I didn’t want to rush things… or make you uncomfortable… I wanted to do it right…”

You could see the earnestness in his eyes, the genuine concern that he had been holding back, and it melted your heart. But you also saw the nervousness, the self-doubt that had kept him from making a move, and you knew you needed to reassure him.

“Spencer,” you said gently, reaching out to place a hand on his knee. The touch seemed to ground him, and his gaze finally settled on you, his expression softening as he realized you weren’t upset—just curious.

“I appreciate that you’re trying to be careful,” you continued, giving his knee a gentle squeeze. “But I want you to know that you don’t have to be so afraid. I like you—a lot. And if you want to kiss me… well, I’m ready whenever you are.”

Spencer swallowed hard, his eyes searching yours for any hint of hesitation or uncertainty. When he found none, he let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, his shoulders relaxing just a bit.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you for a while now,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “I just didn’t know if… if you felt the same way.”

You smiled, your heart swelling with affection for this man who was so brilliant, so caring, and yet so unsure of himself when it came to matters of the heart. “I do,” you assured him, your voice just as soft. “So maybe we should stop overthinking it?”

Spencer’s lips quirked up into a small, tentative smile, and he nodded. “Maybe we should.”

And with that, he leaned in slowly, his eyes never leaving yours as he closed the distance between you. When his lips finally met yours, it was gentle, almost tentative at first, as if he was still worried about getting it right. But as you responded, kissing him back with all the warmth and affection you’d been holding onto, Spencer relaxed into the kiss, letting himself finally savor the moment he’d been waiting for.

When you finally pulled back, both of you were smiling, the awkwardness and uncertainty from before completely melted away. Spencer’s face was still a bit flushed, but now there was a light in his eyes—a confidence that hadn’t been there before.

“Wow,” he breathed, his voice filled with wonder and a touch of amazement. “That was… that was really nice.”

You laughed softly, brushing a stray lock of hair from his forehead. “Yeah, it was,” you agreed, feeling a warm glow in your chest. “And you know what? We can do that again anytime you want.”

Spencer grinned, looking like a kid on Christmas. “Really?”

“Oh, doctor. You’re too sweet, really,” you replied, your heart warming at the sight of his pure excitement.

And with that, the two of you settled back into the couch, this time with a newfound closeness that made the night feel even more perfect than before.

—

After you left that night, Spencer couldn’t shake the new sensation that had taken root in his gut. It was different from anything he’d felt before—intense, almost overwhelming. Of course, he’d been aroused before, but never by the thought of someone he could actually touch whenever he wanted, someone who had explicitly told him so.

As he lay in bed, replaying the evening in his mind, the memory of your kiss and the warmth of your body next to his fueled that unfamiliar feeling. It wasn’t just the physical attraction—it was the knowledge that you wanted him too, that you were there for him in a way no one else had ever been.

His breath quickened as the sensation grew, spreading through him like wildfire. Without fully realizing it, Spencer found his hand sliding down his body, reaching into his own pants. The touch sent a shiver down his spine, a thrill of anticipation building as he prepared to explore this new, intoxicating feeling.

For the first time, it wasn’t just about curiosity or need—it was about you, and the desire that had ignited between you both. And as he began to indulge in that sensation, he allowed himself to get lost in the thought of you, embracing the closeness he had longed for and now had the freedom to explore.

—

Penelope had extended an invitation to you for a team night at the bar that Friday, and you couldn’t help but feel a mix of excitement and nervousness. Meeting all of Spencer’s close friends felt like an important step, one that you wanted to approach the right way. But before accepting, you decided it was best to check with Spencer first.

You dialed his number, feeling a flutter in your chest as you waited for him to pick up. It didn’t take long.

“Hello?” Spencer’s voice came through the line, a hint of warmth already in his tone.

“Hey, doctor,” you greeted, smiling to yourself at the familiar sound of his voice.

“Y/N,” he responded, and you could hear the smile in his voice too, making your own grin widen. 

“So… Penelope invited me out for drinks with your team this weekend. Is that okay? If I come?” you asked, a touch of uncertainty creeping into your voice.

“Oh, yeah. Of course,” Spencer replied quickly, his tone reassuring. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Well, you know, I don’t know,” you admitted, feeling a bit silly for even asking but needing to be sure. “I didn’t want to intrude or make things awkward.”

“Y/N, it’s totally fine,” Spencer assured you, his voice gentle. “I’m really glad you’re coming. The team will love you.”

“Okay,” you said, feeling a wave of relief wash over you. “I’m excited to meet everyone. And to spend more time with you, of course.”

“Me too,” Spencer said softly, and you could practically feel his smile through the phone. “It’s going to be a great night.”

—

Spencer wasn’t expecting a knock at his door after work on Friday, so when he heard it, he was momentarily confused. But he answered the door anyway, curiosity getting the better of him. When he opened it, he was surprised to see you standing there, looking a bit flustered.

“Y/N?” he said, his voice laced with surprise.

“Hi,” you greeted, offering a small, apologetic smile. “I’m sorry to just show up, but…”

“But…?” Spencer prompted, his concern quickly shifting to curiosity.

“I don’t know what to wear tonight,” you admitted, your cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

Spencer couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound light and full of affection. “You didn’t want to ask Penelope?”

“Oh god,” you groaned, suddenly self-conscious. “Do you not want me here right now? I’m intruding, aren’t I?”

“No! No, you’re not intruding,” Spencer quickly reassured you, shaking his head. “I just… I don’t know how much I can help you with that.”

“You can help me plenty,” you replied, your tone more confident as you stepped inside.

Spencer closed the door behind you, still smiling at the unexpected turn of events. “Okay, well, what are your options?”

You sighed dramatically and dropped a large bag onto Spencer’s floor with a thud, causing his eyes to widen in shock. “I have a few things to try on,” you announced, your tone light but your expression determined.

“I see that,” Spencer replied, still processing the sheer size of the bag. His mind was already spinning with the thought of you modeling different outfits in his apartment, a scenario that both thrilled and unnerved him.

“Should I change in your bedroom?” you asked, already heading in that direction.

“Mhm, yeah, that’s fine,” Spencer managed to say, though his voice was a bit distracted, his thoughts lingering on the image of you stripping down in his bedroom, even if he wasn’t going to be in there.

But then a sudden realization hit him, and he panicked. “Wait!” he yelled, his voice more urgent than he intended. But it was too late. You had already disappeared into his bedroom.

Spencer rushed down the hall, his heart pounding. When he reached the doorway, he found you standing there, holding up the one thing he had desperately hoped you wouldn’t see: a framed photo of you.

“Where did you get this?” you asked, turning to him with a curious smile, the photo held gently in your hands.

Spencer felt his face flush with embarrassment as he looked at the floor, his hands fidgeting nervously. “Penelope gave it to me…” he mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper.

You studied the photo for a moment, recognizing it as one from a team event Penelope had captured—a candid shot of you laughing, completely unaware of the camera. It was one of those moments that felt so genuine, so full of life, and it surprised you to see it framed in Spencer’s room.

“Spencer,” you said softly, your voice filled with warmth rather than the teasing he had expected. “It’s so sweet that you kept this.”

He finally looked up, his expression a mixture of shyness and vulnerability. “I didn’t know where else to put it,” he admitted, his voice still quiet. “I just… I like having it around. It makes me think of you.”

Your heart melted at his honesty, and you stepped closer, still holding the photo. “I’m glad you kept it. It means a lot to me.”

Spencer’s eyes softened as he met your gaze, relief washing over him. “It does?”

“Of course it does,” you replied, setting the photo down carefully on his dresser. “It’s nice to know you were thinking of me.”

He smiled, the tension easing out of his shoulders. “I think about you a lot.”

You returned his smile, feeling a wave of affection for him. “Good. Because I think about you a lot too.”

For a moment, the two of you just stood there, then, with a playful glint in your eye, you broke the silence. “Now, how about you help me decide what to wear tonight?”

Spencer chuckled, the earlier awkwardness dissolving completely. “Okay,” he said, his voice lighter now. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”

And with that, you returned to your bag of outfits, searching for the first look. Spencer tried his best to focus on giving you his honest opinion, but with every outfit you modeled, the room seemed to grow warmer, and his pants became more uncomfortable with every bit of skin you revealed.

Each outfit was stunning, and Spencer found himself more captivated by you with each one. But when you finally emerged in the last outfit, he was sure he had died and gone to heaven.

Spencer’s breath caught in his throat as he took in the sight of you. The outfit was perfect—elegant yet bold, with just the right amount of allure. He could barely find the words as he watched you give a playful spin, the fabric hugging your curves in all the right places.

Spencer coughed, trying to regain his composure. “That—um, that’s the one,” he managed to say, his voice a little strained.

“Really?” you asked, a pleased smile spreading across your face as you noticed the effect you were having on him.

Spencer nodded, his mouth suddenly dry as he watched you. “Yup,” he thought to himself, "I’m dead."

You laughed softly, clearly enjoying his reaction, and Spencer couldn’t help but think that you were more than ready to meet his team—looking as stunning as you did. But what he hadn’t expected was just how much he wanted to keep you all to himself, if only for a little longer.

—

“Woah! Pretty boy found himself a pretty girl,” Derek exclaimed as soon as you and Spencer walked into the bar, arm in arm. His voice was full of good-natured teasing, but there was genuine admiration in his eyes as he took in your appearance. “You clean up nice, Miss Therapist!”

You couldn’t help but laugh, feeling both flattered and a little bashful under the attention. “Thanks, Derek,” you replied with a smile, feeling Spencer’s arm tighten around yours in a subtle but protective gesture.

Spencer’s cheeks flushed slightly, but there was a small, proud smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He still couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have you by his side, and seeing his teammates’ reactions only made it sweeter.

“You’re not looking too bad yourself,” you teased back, your voice light and playful as you settled into the lively atmosphere of the bar. It was clear that you were comfortable, quickly warming up to Spencer's team. 

But Spencer, who had been enjoying the moment just seconds before, suddenly felt a pang of something he wasn’t accustomed to—jealousy. He stiffened slightly, the green monster of jealousy rearing its ugly head as he watched you banter so easily with Derek. Rationally, he knew there was nothing to worry about, but seeing how well you clicked with everyone else made him momentarily insecure.

As you continued introducing yourself to the rest of the team, you must have sensed Spencer’s unease because you glanced back at him, catching his eye. When your gaze met his, the jealousy that had been bubbling beneath the surface started to fade. You gave him a warm, reassuring smile, your eyes sparkling with affection.

“Can we get a drink, doctor?” you asked, your voice sweet as you directed your attention back to him.

“We?” he teased, raising an eyebrow, though he couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips.

You blushed, leaning up to whisper in his ear, “I don’t want to leave your side,” your breath warm against his skin.

And just like that, the jealousy was gone. Spencer felt a wave of relief and affection wash over him, the insecurities he’d felt moments before dissipating. You didn’t want to be anywhere else but with him, and that realization made him feel more confident and secure than ever.

He smiled, his heart swelling with a mix of gratitude and happiness. “Then let’s get that drink,” he said softly, wrapping an arm around your waist as the two of you headed toward the bar, ready to enjoy the night together, side by side.

—

As the night wore on, you found yourself listening intently to the team, who seemed all too eager to share some of Spencer’s more memorable, and perhaps a bit embarrassing, moments. Spencer sat beside you, a slightly apprehensive look on his face as the stories began to flow.

“You know, Spencer’s come a long way,” JJ started with a grin, her eyes twinkling as she glanced at him. “But I’ll never forget the time he tried to impress us all by downing a whole shot of whiskey in one go. He spent the next hour trying to convince us that he didn’t hate it, even though his face was bright red, and he looked like he was about to pass out.”

Emily burst into laughter at the memory, adding, “Oh, and then there was the time we had that karaoke night. Spencer swore up and down that he wasn’t going to sing, but after a few drinks, he got up there and belted out the most enthusiastic rendition of ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ I’ve ever seen. The best part? He knew every single word.”

Spencer groaned, covering his face with his hands. “I was coerced,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by his hands.

Rossi chuckled, giving Spencer a good-natured pat on the back. “We’ve all had our moments, kid. But remember that time you went undercover at that poker game? You were so nervous, you almost gave yourself away because you kept quoting statistics about the probability of certain hands.”

The group erupted into laughter, and you couldn’t help but join in, imagining Spencer trying to maintain his cover while rattling off numbers. Spencer, though clearly a little embarrassed, was also smiling, appreciating the camaraderie despite being the center of the stories.

“Hey, it was relevant information!” Spencer protested, his cheeks still tinged with pink.

You leaned into him, grinning as you said, “I think it’s cute. You just wanted to make sure they were all well-informed.”

Spencer sighed, but there was a smile on his face as he looked at you. “I guess if you think so, then it’s not all bad.”

Everyone exchanged knowing looks, clearly pleased with how much you seemed to appreciate Spencer’s quirks. 

JJ leaned in, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, “Just wait until you hear about the time he got locked in the evidence room with nothing but a box of donuts and a rubber chicken. Now that’s a story.”

Spencer’s eyes widened, and he quickly cut in, “Okay, that’s enough! No more embarrassing stories for one night!”

You laughed, squeezing his hand under the table. “Don’t worry, Spencer. I’m enjoying every minute of it.”

Spencer smiled, feeling a sense of warmth and acceptance from you and his team. Despite the teasing, he was surrounded by people who cared about him—and knowing that you were part of that made the night feel all the more special.

—

Emily, her tongue loosened by the liquor, leaned in with a mischievous grin. “So, do you ever get super hot patients?” she asked, her eyes twinkling with curiosity.

You couldn’t help but laugh at the question, glancing over at Spencer before replying, “I mean… I got Spencer, didn’t I?”

The group erupted in laughter, but none louder than Spencer, who blushed furiously at your response. His face turned a deep shade of red as he buried it in your hair, trying to hide from the playful teasing. The sight of him trying to disappear was met with even more amusement from everyone at the table.

“Ohhh, pretty boy,” Derek chimed in, grinning from ear to ear. “What did you two get up to during those private sessions?”

Spencer groaned, clearly mortified, while you simply chuckled, enjoying the lighthearted moment. “Just some very professional physical therapy, of course,” you said with a wink, playing along with the teasing.

Emily laughed, raising her glass in a mock toast. “Well, whatever you did, it seems to have worked wonders. Spencer’s never looked better.”

The group continued to joke and laugh, the atmosphere full of warmth and camaraderie. Despite the embarrassment, Spencer couldn’t help but smile, feeling incredibly lucky to have you by his side, even if it meant enduring a little teasing from his friends. 

You leaned closer to him, whispering softly so only he could hear, “Don’t worry, Spencer. I think you’re the hottest patient I’ve had.”

Spencer’s blush deepened, but the smile on his face showed just how much your words meant to him. The night continued with more stories, more laughter, and a growing sense of connection that made Spencer feel more at ease than ever before.

—

As the night began to wind down, the lively atmosphere in the bar was gradually giving way to a more subdued, tired vibe. The laughter had softened, and the conversations were growing quieter. You noticed Spencer leaning in closer to you, his presence warm and familiar, but there was something different in the way he moved this time—something more deliberate, more intimate.

His hand, steady yet gentle, found its way to your inner thigh, just beneath the edge of your dress. The touch was subtle, but the electricity it sent through your body was anything but. You felt his fingers dance dangerously close to your panties, a teasing reminder of the tension that had been building between you all night.

He leaned in even closer, his lips brushing against your ear, his breath warm against your skin. “Do you want to get out of here?” he whispered, his voice low and laced with desire and anticipation.

The combination of his touch and the way his words sent a thrill down your spine made your heart race. You could barely think, barely breathe, and without a second thought, you found yourself nodding—perhaps a bit too eagerly, as you felt like a bobblehead. But you didn’t care. All you knew was that you wanted to leave, to be alone with him, to let the night take you wherever it was meant to go.

Spencer smiled, clearly pleased with your response. He gave your thigh a gentle squeeze before pulling back just enough to catch your eyes, the look he gave you full of unspoken promises. He didn’t need to say anything else—the two of you were completely in sync.

You both quickly made your excuses to the rest of the team, who were too absorbed in their own conversations to notice much. And then, with Spencer’s hand still resting on your thigh, you slipped out of the bar together, leaving behind the tired vibes for the promise of what was to come.

The night air was cool and crisp as you stepped outside, but the heat between you and Spencer was undeniable, crackling with anticipation. He kept his hand not on his cane on your hip, guiding you through the quiet streets, and you knew that whatever happened next, you were more than ready for it.

—

The moment you stepped inside Spencer’s apartment, the door barely clicked shut behind you before he was on you. His hand found your waist, pulling you close as his mouth captured yours in a kiss that was as urgent as it was deep. It was as if all the tension, all the unspoken desire that had simmered between you all night, finally erupted in this single, intense moment.

You responded just as eagerly, your fingers tangling in his hair as you pressed yourself against him. The world outside his apartment seemed to disappear, leaving only the two of you, lost in each other. His lips moved against yours with a fervor that made your knees weak, and you found yourself clinging to him, needing to feel every inch of his body against yours.

Spencer’s hand roamed from your waist to your back, pulling you even closer as he kissed you like a man starved. He broke away just long enough to catch his breath, his forehead resting against yours as he whispered, “I’ve wanted to do this all night.”

“Me too,” you breathed, your voice barely a whisper, your heart pounding in your chest. Without waiting for a response, you captured his lips again, this time with even more intensity.

You barely made it past the entryway, stumbling together toward the living room, neither of you willing to let go long enough to think about where you were headed. All that mattered was the feel of his mouth on yours, the warmth of his body pressed against you, and the electricity that crackled between you with every touch, every kiss.

Spencer’s hand slipped beneath your dress, his fingers tracing the curve of your ass, sending shivers down your spine. You moaned softly into his mouth, the sound spurring him on as he backed you up against the wall, his lips never leaving yours.

“Spencer,” you murmured between kisses, trying to catch his attention as his lips continued to explore your neck. “Mmm, Spencer—wait.”

He finally pulled away, panting, his eyes dark with desire. “Yeah?” he asked, clearly trying to understand why you’d stopped him.

You took a deep breath, your heart racing for reasons other than the passionate kiss you’d just shared. “I just—well, we’ve been drinking,” you said, your voice hesitant.

Spencer nodded, his brow furrowing slightly in confusion. “I know.”

You bit your lip, searching for the right words. “Don’t make me say it,” you whispered, not wanting to dampen the moment but needing to address the concern that had surfaced.

Spencer really pulled back then, his expression shifting from desire to confusion. “What?” he asked, genuinely puzzled.

You met his gaze, feeling a mix of vulnerability and care for him. “Are you a virgin?” you asked softly, the question hanging in the air between you.

Spencer’s eyes widened slightly, realization dawning on him. “Is that what this is about?”

“No!” you quickly reassured him, but then added, “Well, yes. I don’t want your first time to be when we’re both intoxicated. Especially with your leg—I don’t want to hurt you.”

Spencer’s expression softened as he began to understand the depth of your concern. He reached up, gently cupping your face in his hands, his thumb brushing your cheek in a soothing gesture. “Y/N,” he began, his voice filled with warmth and understanding, “I appreciate that you’re thinking about this… about me. But I want you to know that I’m not rushing into this without knowing what I’m doing.”

You started to protest, your worry still gnawing at you. “But—”

“Just listen,” he interrupted softly, his voice steady as he leaned in to kiss you, a kiss filled with reassurance and longing. “I’ve been thinking about you for so long,” he continued, pulling back just enough to meet your eyes. “I know what I want.”

“Spencer…” you whispered, your heart aching with how much you cared for him. “I can’t have sex with you when we’re drunk. Not now.”

He held your gaze, his expression unwavering, and nodded slowly. “Okay,” he said, his voice gentle and full of respect. “I understand.”

You could see the sincerity in his eyes, the way he valued your feelings just as much as his own desires. It was in that moment you realized just how much this man meant to you—how much you both meant to each other.

“I want it to be right,” you said softly, your voice carrying the weight of your emotions. “For both of us.”

Spencer smiled, a tender, loving smile that made your heart swell. “And it will be,” he promised. “When the time is right. I can wait, Y/N. We can wait.”

You nodded, feeling a profound sense of relief and gratitude. “Thank you,” you whispered, leaning in to kiss him again, this time with the knowledge that you were both on the same page, both willing to take your time.

Spencer wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close, and for the rest of the night, you simply held each other, content in the knowledge that what you had was special—something worth cherishing and protecting. There was no rush, no pressure, just the comfort of being together, knowing that when the time came, it would be perfect.

—

Spencer woke up the next morning to the gentle light of the early sun filtering through the curtains. The first thing he noticed was the comfortable weight on his chest—a soft, warm presence that made his heart swell with contentment. Blinking the sleep from his eyes, he looked down to find you curled up against him, your head resting on his chest, your breath soft and steady.

A smile tugged at his lips as he took in the sight of you, your hair slightly tousled, your face relaxed in sleep. He couldn’t help but notice the small spot of drool on his shirt where your mouth rested, but instead of feeling anything but affection, he found it endearing. The fact that you were so comfortable with him, so at ease, made him feel a deep sense of warmth and happiness.

Careful not to disturb you, Spencer shifted slightly, realizing that his leg was properly elevated, a pillow supporting it in just the right way. He hadn’t remembered doing that, but the thought that you had taken care of him, even after everything, made his heart swell even more.

His gaze shifted to the glass of water sitting on the nightstand beside him, another thoughtful gesture that you had left for him. It was such a simple thing, but it spoke volumes about how much you cared.

For a moment, Spencer just lay there, savoring the feeling of having you in his arms, of waking up to this kind of peaceful morning. It was new, and it was wonderful, and he realized that he could get used to this—waking up with you, taking care of each other, sharing these quiet, intimate moments.

Gently, he brushed a strand of hair away from your face, his touch light so as not to wake you. You stirred slightly, nuzzling closer to him, and Spencer couldn’t help but chuckle softly. Even in sleep, you sought him out, and that simple act made him feel like the luckiest man in the world.

“Spence?” you whined quietly, your voice still thick with sleep as you shifted slightly against his chest.

“Yeah?” Spencer replied softly, his hand gently rubbing your back.

“You’re so comfy… so warm,” you mumbled, your words slurred as you burrowed deeper into him.

“I’m glad,” he chuckled, feeling a warmth that had nothing to do with the blanket covering you both.

A moment of quiet passed before you asked, “Did I drool on you?”

“Yes, you did,” he answered, a teasing lilt in his voice.

“Ughh, that’s embarrassing,” you groaned, trying to hide your face against him.

“I think it’s cute,” Spencer reassured you, a smile playing on his lips as he held you closer.

You sighed, your voice softening even more. “I really like you.”

“I really like you more,” Spencer replied without missing a beat, his heart swelling at the simple honesty of the moment.

“Nuh uh,” you mumbled, your sleepy defiance only making him smile wider.

“Yuh huh,” he countered, his voice light and teasing, feeling a sense of giddy, light-hearted joy he hadn’t experienced in a long time.

You let out a small, contented sigh, your hand resting on his chest as you settled back into the warmth and comfort of his embrace. “We’ll have to settle this later,” you whispered, already half-asleep again.

Spencer smiled, his heart full as he whispered back, “I’m looking forward to it.”

And as you drifted back to sleep, Spencer lay there, feeling lighter than air, the weight of the world replaced by the simple joy of having you there with him, in this perfect, quiet moment.

—

Later that morning, you found yourself in Spencer's kitchen, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filling the air. You leaned casually against the counter, watching him as he focused on making your cup just the way you liked it. There was something so endearing about the way he moved, so intent on getting it right, that it made you smile.

“Do you remember last night?” you asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

Spencer glanced up at you, a small, knowing smile on his lips. “All of it,” he replied confidently.

“Seriously?” You raised an eyebrow, half-impressed, half-incredulous. “You drank a lot.”

He chuckled softly, shaking his head as he poured the coffee into a mug. “Eidetic memory,” he reminded you, his tone light. “It doesn’t just go away.”

You couldn’t help but grin, leaning in a little closer. “So you remember trying sooo desperately to get in my pants?”

“Y/N,” Spencer groaned, his face flushing as he turned away from the coffee pot. He shot you a look of playful exasperation. “Do not say it like that.”

You laughed, delighted by his reaction. “But it’s true!”

Spencer shook his head, his lips twitching with a smile despite his embarrassment. “I was trying to… be intimate with my… lady friend,” he said, the words coming out a little stilted as he tried to sound casual.

“Lady friend?” you laughed, raising an eyebrow at his choice of words.

“Yup,” he replied, trying to muster up some false confidence, though his cheeks were still tinged pink.

“Is that what I am to you?” you teased, leaning in closer, your grin playful.

“Special lady friend?” he suggested, his voice laced with a hint of nervousness.

“You scared of something, Doctor?” you grinned, wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him just a bit closer.

“Not right now,” he admitted, the sincerity in his voice matching the way his eyes softened as he looked at you.

“Then ask me,” you prompted, your voice dropping to a gentle whisper.

Spencer took a deep breath, his hand coming up to gently cup your chin, his touch tender. He looked into your eyes, trying to muster the courage to be vulnerable. “Y/N, will you be my bestest friend?” he asked, his tone light but serious.

You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift in his words, and the humor drained from your face. “No, jerk,” you said, pushing him away, your playful mood evaporating as frustration and anger bubbled up inside you.

Spencer’s eyes widened, confusion and concern flashing across his face. “Y/N, I didn’t mean—”

But you were already stepping back, feeling hurt by the way he had sidestepped what you thought was going to be a genuine, heartfelt moment. “I thought you were going to ask me to be your girlfriend, Spencer,” you said, your voice tight with emotion. “Not just your… your ‘bestest friend.’”

Spencer’s face fell as he realized his attempt to be cute had backfired. “Y/N, I’m sorry,” he said quickly, reaching out to you, his eyes full of genuine remorse. “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

You allowed yourself to be pulled back into his arms. “I shouldn’t have joked in such a serious moment,” he continued, his voice soft and sincere. “I’m sorry.” Then, with a hopeful glint in his eyes, he asked, “Y/N… will you be my girlfriend?”

You tried to keep a grumpy expression, but it was hard to resist his earnest gaze. “And your bestest friend?” you asked, your voice carrying a hint of playful irritation.

“Ideally, yes,” Spencer replied, his tone gentle but hopeful.

You couldn’t hold back a smile any longer. “Yes, Spencer. But you’re on thin ice in the bestest friend department.”

“Noted,” he nodded seriously, a smile tugging at his lips. “How am I doing in the boyfriend department?”

You pretended to think for a moment before leaning in closer, a mischievous smile playing on your lips. “Well, I have an ache I need looked into. Can my doctor boyfriend check it out?”

“Of course,” Spencer said, his voice taking on a playful tone as he leaned in as well. “What hurts?”

You smiled, letting the moment linger before you pointed at your lips, your eyes sparkling with affection. Spencer grinned, closing the distance between you, and pressed a gentle, tender kiss to your lips.

“Anything else hurt?” Spencer asked, his lips barely brushing against yours, his voice low and filled with teasing and tenderness.

“Nuh uh,” you murmured, enjoying the closeness. Then, with a mischievous glint in your eye, you added, “But I might need to give you a physical. It seems like there’s something I missed in our last one.”

Spencer pulled back slightly, a puzzled expression crossing his face as he glanced down. The moment he noticed the tent forming under his sweats, his cheeks flushed a deep shade of red, realization dawning on him.

“Uh,” he stammered, clearly flustered, his eyes flicking back up to meet yours. You couldn’t help but giggle at his reaction, finding his innocence utterly adorable.

Spencer chuckled nervously, trying to regain his composure. “I guess it’s a good thing that wasn’t there during my last physical,” he said, his voice tinged with playful embarrassment.

You threw your head back in a laugh, the sound filling the room. “You’re right, that would have made things a little awkward.”

“And now?” Spencer asked, his voice softening, a hint of shyness creeping in as he looked at you with a mix of anticipation and curiosity.

“Now…” you murmured, dragging a finger down his chest, feeling the way his breath hitched at your touch. “You should get off your leg; you’ve been standing for a while.”

Spencer couldn’t help but feel a slight pang of disappointment at the change in direction, but he knew you were right. “Right, yeah,” he agreed, using his cane to walk over to the table and sitting down carefully. “Can you bring me my coffee, please?”

You smiled, taking in how sweet he looked as he tried to hide his disappointment. “Hmm, in a minute,” you replied, your voice holding a hint of something more.

Before Spencer could process what was happening, you were lowering yourself to your knees between his spread legs, your hands gently rubbing his thighs. The careful, tender way you touched him made his heart race, and he found himself holding his breath, unsure of what to say or do.

You were generously careful not to put too much pressure on his bad leg, your touch light but purposeful. Spencer’s pulse quickened, the intimacy and tenderness in your actions overwhelming in the best way possible.

“Y/N…” Spencer breathed, his voice full of awe and desire as he looked down at you, his heart pounding in his chest. 

You met his gaze, your eyes filled with warmth and affection as you asked softly, “Is this okay, doctor?”

Spencer’s breath hitched, and he swallowed hard before admitting, “I’ve never done this before.”

You nodded, your voice gentle and reassuring as you pressed a soft kiss to his knee. “I know, I know,” you whispered, giving him the space to decide. “Do you want to? We can stop right now, no pressure.”

His eyes fluttered closed for a moment, overwhelmed by the care in your voice and the sensation of your lips on him. “I want to so badly,” he finally breathed out, his voice shaky with desire. “If you stop right now, I might cry.”

“Mmm,” you hummed with a playful smile, “you’d make a pretty crier.”

Spencer’s eyes snapped open, and he felt a sudden rush of heat in his stomach at your words, the unexpected compliment sending a thrill through him. “Jesus, Y/N,” he murmured, his voice filled with surprise and longing.

“Can you lift your hips, lover boy, or do you need to stand?” you asked, your voice light with teasing affection.

Spencer hesitated for a moment before admitting, “I think I need to stand…”

“Get up then,” you instructed, a playful glint in your eyes.

As Spencer stood up, you couldn’t resist giving his butt a gentle smack. The action made him gasp, and he turned to playfully glare at you, his eyes wide with surprise. “What has gotten into you this morning?” he asked, amusement and bewilderment in his voice.

You grinned like a devil, your expression full of mischief. “Nothing yet,” you replied, your tone suggestive and lighthearted, leaving Spencer both flustered and intrigued.

His mouth opened and closed for a moment, caught off guard by your boldness. But he couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips, the warmth in his chest growing as he realized just how much he enjoyed this playful side of you.

You pulled down his sweats slowly, your fingers brushing against his skin as you went, and you couldn’t resist placing soft kisses along the newly exposed flesh. As the fabric fell away, you realized there was nothing underneath, just bare skin.

“You sleep commando, Doctor?” you asked with a teasing lilt in your voice, raising an eyebrow as you looked up at him.

Spencer’s face flushed a deep shade of red, clearly embarrassed. “I had been drinking,” he stammered, trying to explain away the situation.

“Mhm,” you hummed, your lips curving into a playful smile as you continued your gentle ministrations, enjoying the effect you had on him. The sight of his blush only made the moment sweeter, knowing that he was letting you in, vulnerability and all.

Once the offending material was pooled around his ankles, you took Spencer’s hand, guiding him back to the seat with a gentle but firm touch. He followed your lead, his breath hitching as he sat back down, his eyes locked onto yours. The room seemed to hum with the tension between you, every movement deliberate and charged with anticipation.

“This is so unsanitary,” he muttered, a flicker of his usual nervousness cutting through the haze of desire.

You paused, a small smile playing on your lips as you looked up at him, your fingers still resting lightly on his thigh. “Do you want to stop?” you asked, your voice low and steady, giving him every opportunity to back out if he felt uncomfortable.

“God, no,” Spencer breathed, the words escaping him before he could even think. His eyes were wide, pupils dilated with longing and vulnerability, and you could tell that despite his nerves, he was fully present, fully committed to whatever came next.

With that reassurance, you leaned in closer, making sure to hold his gaze as your hand traveled up his thigh. The connection between you was electric, each second stretched out, full of unspoken promises. You kept your eyes locked on his as you slowly lowered your mouth, the heat of your breath teasing his skin.

Spencer’s breath hitched again, his hand instinctively tightening its grip on the edge of the chair. The vulnerability in his gaze was matched by the trust he was placing in you, and you could feel the weight of that trust in the air between you. 

You moved deliberately, never breaking eye contact, letting him see every intention behind your actions. As your lips brushed against his skin, you could feel the shiver that ran through him, the way his muscles tensed in anticipation.

And then, with a slow, deliberate motion, you pressed a kiss to his head, your touch soft but charged with all the emotion that had been building between you. Spencer’s breath caught, his body responding immediately to the intimate contact. His eyes fluttered shut for a brief moment before he forced them open again, wanting to see everything, to remember every second of this moment.

The sensation was overwhelming for Spencer, a powerful blend of pleasure and intimacy that he had never experienced before. The way your tongue traced patterns up his cock before your lips sucked him down sent Spencer spiraling. His mind, usually so sharp and focused, was spinning, struggling to keep up with the flood of emotions and sensations coursing through his body.

He couldn’t help the deep whine that escaped his lips, his breath hitching as he felt your lips move against his skin. The feeling of your tongue swirling around his head when you pulled up while your hand kept the pace was so intensely real. He had read about intimacy, studied the science of it, but nothing could have prepared him for the actual experience, the way it felt to be so completely vulnerable and yet so utterly safe.

His thoughts raced, a thousand ideas and feelings swirling in his mind, but they all came back to one simple truth: he wanted this. He wanted you. More than he had ever wanted anything in his life. The logical part of his brain was still trying to process it all, trying to make sense of the overwhelming flood of sensations, but the emotional part of him had already surrendered, fully immersed in the moment.

“Y/N…” he breathed, his voice trembling slightly with the weight of everything he was feeling. He wanted to say more, to express how much this meant to him, how much you meant to him, but the words seemed to get stuck in his throat. 

You looked up at him, your eyes full of mischief and your lips stretched around his girth as you bobbed your head. You could see how much this was affecting him, how deeply it was resonating within him. You held his gaze, your touch firm and stimulating, letting him know that he didn’t have to say anything—he just had to feel.

And feel he did. Every nerve in his body seemed to be on high alert, each one attuned to your touch, to the way your hand moved with your mouth, the way your tongue pressed against his skin. It was intoxicating, overwhelming in the best possible way, and he found himself leaning into it, letting go of the need to analyze or understand, and simply allowing himself to experience.

“Y/N…” he said again, his voice louder this time as the pleasure built to an almost unbearable peak, Spencer’s mind went blissfully blank. There was nothing but the sensation, nothing but your mouth and hand on his cock. Licking, slurping, rubbing. 

Spencer let out one final cry before he was filling your mouth with his warm, salty cum. You hummed around him in appreciation, the vibrations making him whine pitifully. Spencer thought it was over when you pulled off, but then you stuck your tongue out, showing him his milky release sitting there before you closed your mouth and swallowed. 

“You’re insane, woman,” Spencer whispered, his voice still shaky from the intensity of what he had just experienced. His chest rose and fell as he tried to catch his breath, his mind reeling from the sensations still echoing through his body.

You grinned up at him, your eyes sparkling with mischief and affection. “I’m your insane woman,” you replied, your tone playful yet filled with a warmth that made Spencer’s heart swell.

He couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips, the combination of your words and the aftermath of what you’d just shared making him feel like he was floating. “That you are,” he murmured, his hand reaching out to gently brush a stray lock of hair from your face. 

There was something about the way you looked at him, something that made him feel more grounded, more connected than he ever had before. It wasn’t just the physical connection, though that was incredible—it was the emotional bond that had deepened between you, the way you seemed to understand him on a level no one else ever had.

Spencer chuckled softly, still processing everything. “I don’t know how I got so lucky,” he said, his voice filled with sincerity. 

You leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to his lips, the gesture full of affection and promise. “We’re both lucky,” you whispered against his lips, and in that moment, Spencer knew it was true.

There was no rush, no pressure. Just the two of you, together, in a moment that felt like it was just the beginning of something even more beautiful.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

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[heartfullofleeches]

Your hands in Mine

Yan Entities T.V Show Crew (Thirteen, Wishbone) + Host Clown Darling

"Ow!....D-do you always have to hold my hand so tight?"

"Maybe I wouldn't have to if your hands weren't so sweaty all the time...."

"But, I sweat when I'm nervous...."

"Excuses, Excuses.. Thats all you ever give. Why am I stuck with you of all people."

Those two.... Never a moments break from their arguments. You could hear their shouting matches from all the way over the pond- Well, it was moreso of a one character in particular screaming and the other timidly raising their voice to be heard. Wishbone and Thirteenth. A bunny lucky as the number of days in a week, and the cat with misfortune tailing every step they took. Forces of calamity on their own, putting the two together was nearly a worse fate than letting them run freely separately.

Pairing the two together was the only solution anyone could come up with. Side by side, Thirteenth's bad luck canceled out Wishbone's good luck - the same going working the other way around for the rabbit. Still, one troubling issue remained. The duo utterly despised one another and would sooner plunge the world into darkness than hold hands.

A solution to their problems was delivered after becoming part of the show's program. Not by a skilled therapist or even talking about their differences together- The answers to all their disagreements where quelled with the kindest of a colorful character with a smile bright as the suns painted on their clothing.

"Wish, Thirteen.... Is everything alright?"

Thirteenth is swift to throw Wishbone under the bus. "How can anything be alright when I have to put up with them everyday?!? You'd swear you could fill a glass with how much sweat I have to squeeze our my fur after holding their hand all day."

Wishbone tugs at their ears - the staples pinning faux fur to the damage corner of their left ear straining from the pull. "Stop blaming everything on me! How am I supposed to hold your hand when you dig your claws into me whenever your mad?!"

"Maybe if you weren't so infuriating I wouldn't be as pissed off!"

You step between the two as Thirteenth shoots an icy glare, advancing towards the twitchy rabbit; claws unfurled. The distance is thin enough you have no concerns for your safety, prioritizing settling things between your companions.

"Relax, take a deep breath, both of you. I know it's hard for the both of you. Just focus on me."

You feel Wishbone's arms around your midsection as you lay a hand on Thirteenth's neck - scratching at that one spot beneath their chin that had the feline melting in your arms everytime. Given that nobody bothered touching them before due to their curse, you knew how much of a sucker they were for it. You reach your other hand overhead to pat Wishbone's ears. The rabbit's happy sigh rumbles against your back, shaking subsiding as you stroke your fingers down their long ears.

These two were some of the sweetest things when around you....

"Hm....."

Pinching the fingers between your teeth, you pull off your left glove - repeating the same process with your right. You'd seen Thirteenth use these left hand for most things, thus you ask them for their right.

"Thirteen? If you'd be so kind?"

"Okay?..." Puzzled, Thirteenth sticks out their hand. Their claws run the fabric of your glove slim as you slip the glove onto their hand, retracting into their skin as you adjust the glove onto them properly. Once fiinished you turn around to face Wishbone.

"Wish? Your left hand, please?"

The rabbit gives you their arm, practically shoving it into your chrstas they hide behind their ears. You stumble a bit, the teetering on your heels as you regain your balance making you giggle.

"I'm sorry!"

"It's okay, it's okay- Here." The airy laughter in your voice calms them as you fit the glove to the best of your abilities over their slightly larger paw. Thankfully, the elasticity of your gloves holds up as hugs their wrist. Seems like most of the size of their hands was just fur.

"Ta-da!"

Thirteenth and Wishbone look at each other.

"Now you guys don't have to hold each other’s hands directly - whenever you have to, you can just pretend your holding mine!"

You take their gloves hands and pair them together, smooching the back's of their knuckles starting with Wishbone as apology for gifting Thirteenth your glove first. The two look uneasy for a beat, eyes softening a second from being simultaneous. If Wishbone closes their eyes and thinks hard enough, the heat of Thirteenth's palm almost reminds them of yours. Holding Wishbone's hand, Thirteenth fondly recalls the texture of your glove brushing their fur.

"Well?"

Thirteenth sucks air through their teeth, the switching of their tail giving way to their true feelings. "I guess it'll work."

"Yeah....." Wishbone admits, beaming from ear to ear, absolutely dumbstruck you'd give them something with so much meaning. They can't let you down now. "This will do."

"Ahhhh, I'm so proud of you too!"

Squealing with glee, you throw your arms around the two - trapping them in a group hug. Thirteenth's tail wraps around your leg as Wishbone's large paw rests gently on your back.

The two didn't have a lot in common, very few things realistically - but their sole interest in one special clown kept them from killing each other and taking the world down with them.

[inkskinned]

sky is blue and i love robins and my emailbox is full and i love making things for my friends and the ground is frozen and it hasn't snowed this winter which means it'll be a drought this summer again. sky is blue and yesterday i saw a proposal happen on top of a mountain while walking my dog and listening to a dnd podcast and i wasn't lonely i was just kind of awkwardly worried i was ruining the moment and later i spent 4 hours on the floor making a stupid little project.

can i be okay for real this time. can it last. can the horror and the anxiety and the great vast numb horizon all silence themselves and stand like statues at the edge of my soul, only a memory of these things that used to be so powerful. i want to spend the rest of my life in a meadow. i want to spend the rest of my life in a tea party. i want the rest of my life to only lapse in quiet waves instead of the slow advance of acid pools.

sky is blue and i've spent the last year in a hole. i completely burned through 2022. sky is blue and i couldn't look at the moon for months before this week, i was too ashamed for her to see. last year around this time i told my therapist i'm lost i'm lost i'm lost i'm drowning and before i stopped and said - sorry for the hysterics like my dissolving was only a performance. sky is blue and i am still afraid of rabbits and i am still living in a hole with broken glass and ants and it is still winter and i am still so tired and yet! and yet!

can i be okay? can i finally make my way out of this. it doesn't have to be perfect, i don't need that, i'm okay if it means a little work, i guess. it would just be nice for it to exist.

sky is blue. i keep waiting to hear the bird in my chest.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not telling my mom about my heart surgery?

I already know this is going to be a bit long winded so sorry in advance, there's just a lot that I feel is relevant here.

I (21 M) had a heart surgery about a month ago now. It was cardiac ablation, and for anyone wondering, it went just fine and I'm already fully recovered and walking around like normal. I had known about it for weeks prior and of course had been calling my dad and keeping him updated about all this. However, I hesitated to tell my mom, and ultimately never brought it up to her. I still haven't.

For a bit of backstory, my parents split when I was 16 because, to be blunt, my mother was being abusive in just about every avenue. She was mean and cruel and sometimes violent. I don't want to get into all the details because I don't think it's really necessary, but know it was bad. After she finally left I went no-contact with her, as did my dad and older sibling. This seemed to really upset her and she repeatedly tried to reach out to me, sent me expensive gifts, etc. After a while I made it clear to her that the only way I would ever even consider speaking to her again would be if she went to therapy and sorted her shit out, then gave me a real apology for her behavior, and even then she'd be lucky if I spoke to her afterwards.

And, being perfectly fair to her, she did it. She went to therapy, she did the work, and from what I've seen she has really put in the effort to change. She wants to keep me in her life and once I made it clear I wouldn't budge, she got her ass up and did it. She even gave me an apology I wasn't expecting, where she admitted that she only stayed with my father because she was afraid of being a single mother, and she took that resentment out on me and my sibling for most of our lives. Over time, I've maintained contact with her and we have a relationship now. Not sure how great it is, but we have one. She takes me out to lunch sometimes and I actually answer when she calls me.

Back to the topic of my heart, I've always had palpitations here and there, usually three times a week. I thought it was normal. Then after a pretty scary morning that landed me in the ER and lots of testing, the doctors decided surgery was the best option for me. I called my dad, like I said, but I just couldn't bring myself to tell my mother. And it wasn't out of fear or anxiety or not wanting to worry her. I just... didn't want to.

My dad said she had a right to know as my parent, if I was keeping contact with her. I spoke with my therapist about it, and while he didn't outright say I shouldn't tell her, it felt very much like he was leaning that direction. In the end, I never said anything to her, and she's still unaware it even happened.

It's been weighing on my conscience a bit. I had no reason to not tell her. There was nothing stopping me from being up front and honest with her. So I wonder, am I an asshole for not telling her?

What are these acronyms?

[takeariskao3]

idk guys things are just weird

this is going to be a very chaotic and disorganized Personal Post (sorry in advance)

i know this is silly and i don't owe anyone anything, but i genuinely feel so sad that i don't have anything to contribute or post today on harry's birthday.

something is up with my writing and i can't quite put my finger on it.. harry and ginny are being...very soft and not in a way that is in-character or plot driven. things are just off. all my plans i have in my head are literally flying out the window everytime i sit down to write and i don't trust if it is the right decision for the story or just some weird mood i'm in that's manifesting in a really out of character tone on the page.

i suppose it could be a couple different things. i haven't met with my therapist in two weeks so my brain could just be overloaded with other crap that i need to process and or decompress before my writing thoughts feel organized again.

my husband has been massively stressed out because of many different things going on in his life separate from our family and so i've been going a little over the top trying to be there for him.

our daughter hasn't been sleeping all that well and she's been fighting a virus/cold for going on about two weeks that i think we are finally on the tail end of.

work for me is bleh. i don't enjoy what i'm doing right now. we are in one of those cycles that is all reporting and data entry and retention analysis and its so boring and just not at all what fulfills me from this position. however in the same vein, the semester is right around the corner so it's also the last push to make sure everything is ready to go for when students return to campus.

i killed a spider today which is like a very big deal for me. i am deathly afraid of spiders and my good friends can attest that when confronted with one i dissolve into a lot of screaming and sweating and general panic. so i def think i am experiencing the aftermath of an adrenaline rush even though that was like five hours ago.

all of this is to say, i think i need a break from wips. specifically already gone and the entire the path from you universe. i feel like this past month has just been me forcing something that doesn't need to be forced. i think if i take a step back from both stories, and quit putting so much pressure on myself, my head will clear and things will start falling into place.

this week is @corneliaavenue-ao3's ficfest! and i hope this will be a really good way to bring to life some of these soft moments that keep trying to knock down the door and also keep me in the habit of writing. i don't want to put a timeline on it and somehow set an expectation for myself or anyone else but i'm guessing you can expect a two/three week longer hiatus for those two stories, and you can probably expect a fair amount of random one shots and/or drabbles from me in the meantime.

i'm sorry if this is disappointing, i can promise it is just as disappointing for me. i miss having a clear head and the words flowing effortlessly. i hope someday i get that back, but for now, i'm going to hope a little time away from those plots helps settle the static that lives inside my head.

as always, thanks for reading and understanding <3

[theinfernalcollective]

Hey, so, I hope it's okay to ask you questions about DID/DID-related things! And I apologize for the long message in advance.

First of all, a trigger warning for talking about dissociation, trauma (no details) and memory loss. But also one for mention of alcohol (over-)consumption further below (marked with a + in front of it)

So I am not professionally or self diagnosed. I know there's dissociation going on and it has been confirmed by my therapist, but neither of us have much experience with dissociative disorders in general.

I have extensive childhood trauma, some of which I can remember. Most other stuff I can't think about without getting dizzy and nauseous with headaches. Even when I remember bits and pieces, they soon disappear from my memory. All that's left is the knowledge I remembered something.

There was a time (when I was living with a friend) I would notice a lot of gaps in my recent memory, and I've been told I introduced myself with different names sometimes (I vaguely remember that part) or "not act like myself". To this day my friends keep bringing up things we did without me knowing of them at all.

However, that... went away? Once I lived alone again. Or at least I thought so. I still have lots of memory issues and dissociate frequently, but not to that extent at all.

+ (tw) I get drunk with friends online roughly once per week, sometimes less. And I would often black out from that. What confused me was when I started drinking way less during those times, and still blacked out - but only for a little while.

So i.e. I would remember most of the night, including me going to bed, only to later realize while going through my messages that there was a gap in my memory. Usually I'm in an entirely different mood from what I recall myself feeling that night without knowing what might have caused any of it.

I suppose my question is if I'm overreacting? I don't really believe I have to have DID. But I can't stop thinking about it, even though I know it could be so many other things, including my general trauma.

Right now I'm thinking of asking my therapist if he could refer me to someone with more knowledge than him for a one time appointment, but I don't want to be known as a "faker" when it turns out none of my worries were real.

I'm sorry you've been going through all of that. Your best bet is definitely reaching out to a therapist or psychiatrist knowledgeable in dissociative disorders as they'll most likely be able to help alot more.

I definitely don't want to armchair diagnose but it sounds like dissociative amnesia, best of luck to you my friend, and don't worry about being known as a "faker" your seeking support and help for what you've been experiencing, fakers won't seek support or help. - Vesper <3

[st4rb04rd]

Hey ik you guys probably don't care but i dont see my therapist until next week and tumblr is basically my second therapy, so i might as well type out another lengthy vent :)

(I'm sorry in advance)

So today was probably one of the worst days for me, despite yesterday being basically just as bad. I wanted to decay into a discarded pile of dead skin cells in my chair during italian, and i think the boys in the back of the class were calling my name, but i didn't answer for pretty obvious reasons. Someone who hates my guts knows my preferred name and is now tourturing me by randomly yelling it. I remembered that one time last year when i went a little cuckoo and got a pair of (supposedly) child-safe scissors from my nightstand and cut my knuckles, and i then got a feeling that i should have done it again, which might happen later today. In computers, i got really frustrated when i couldn't figure out how to do the code correctly. It gave me anxiety for no reason, and my chest felt tight. I almost threw my headphones. I then got frantic trying to find music i could listen to because the silence was deafening to me, and i needed something to listen to, but we couldn't use spotify. So i ended up trying to find a music program on scratch, which didn't go well, and only made me more anxious and frustrated. Then the school day ended with me being later to the bus than i usually am, which meant that my special seat was taken. And i felt icky, because that's the only seat i like, and the only one that makes me feel good (it's the one with the wheel well on the left side btw). I was also stimming way more than i usually do, and that made me anxious. I think i was overstimulated the whole day, but i have no idea.

Anyway, that was my day. How was yours?

[milf-n-dilf-dippin-dots]

IM GOING TO KILL IM GOING TO KILL IM GOING TO KILL

Last night my roommate and I got some drinks- i shared some soju w him and hit the hay after packing away some stuff n tidying/rinsing etc

I leave at 9am this morning, 3 bottles of soju on the table, 2 cans of sprite and some snacks on the table "oh its fine, he knows im out im sure he'll tidy and throw out some of the counter rubbish for me :>"

Come home at 4pm

The only thing thats been done is the 8 dishes that were in the sink (lil cups, 2 bowls from dinner and cooking utensil) not including the pan on the stove

Nothing thrown away!! Im going crazy!!!!!!!!!

Be so fr gang, am i like. Blowing it out of proportion? Or is the fact that im the primary cleaner of the house insane.

Important note is that i have no choice but to be the person who does mostah the cleaning- because he sleeps 12 hours a day, waking up around 2 or 3 pm and not going to bed until 5 or 6 am.

I went away for 2 nights n i come home and hes like "oh i could finally get stuff done because im only productive at 4am"

Which hey man sure dude you do you i dont care what you do in yer free time-

But my ass isnt gonna go 'yes! Sure! You can vacuum and wash dishes late at night/early am! Even though it keeps me awake because i cant close my door!'

But i also dont want to end up being this dudes damn mother the fucking manchild doesnt even know how to mop properly- or vacuum properly! And he doesnt vac the carpet! Or wipe down the oven/benches after using em! Like cmon man!!

"Oh but maybe he didnt get taught!"

Dawg i am his roommate, at what point is it my responsibility to teach a whole entire dude how to take care of his surroundings. I saw his room when he moved out- it was bad. This dude borders of raw negligence of his surroundings, and if it wouldnt cause me the harm i would stop cleaning up after him just so hed suffer. And he leaves the tap running to wash dishes.

I dont know what i expected tbh- his parents built 2 houses for their kids next to their 2 storey spiral staircase chandelier having house.

Im fighting for my fuckin life over here- 300 rent a week, 125 a fortnight for a couch, 50 a month for wifi, etc while this dudes like "yeah i paid all my rent a month in advance, and i get my money from dividense" it makes me want to break his trachea.

Like lets be fr i am blatantly not a pleasant person, moreso in high doses, and moreso when i have to deal w someone who fucks their own life even when theyve gotten dealt the perfect hand of cards to do well.

Like, yeah man im sorry you cheated on your girlfriend of multiple years for 5 whole months then got sad about it and became an insomniac but im not gonna suffer your shit schedule and not sleep well because you wont see a therapist or take meds. Like is that my problem? To be clear im not a cunt to his face, but i am a cunt. And i am annoyed at him. Maybe i should commune like a normal person, but that involves me sitting this dude down to tell him he needs to pay attention to things like 'responsibility' and 'reasonable expectations'.

He had guests over a while ago and i ended up cooking for them all!! And cleaning up after them!! And making breakfast the next morning!! He apparently makes 1800 a fortnight and he spends almost all of that. He owes me money!! Sometimes i pay for groceries n he just has to pay me back! Like dude???

[hearts4farryn]

July 19, 2023

TW! ed, sa, addiction, basically dead dove don’t eat

After years of an ed, I finally find myself on Tumblr; the HOLY GRAIL of disordered people. You’d think after 3 years of therapy, several hospital trips, and multiple attempts i’d learn my lesson. At this point I think I just like wallowing in my mental illnesses. Once quarantine started, I just went spiraling down a path in the wrong direction. But this year has been the most wild point of my life. It’s funny, a couple weeks ago my step-dad asked me if I had hit rock bottom. His question didn’t sprout from just a few of my life’s mishaps though. My biological dad who lives across the United States sent my and in-depth suicide note through his Gmail; causing me to stress over him for weeks. A few months earlier I had been raped by a man in his 20’s, but he got shot 2 weeks after. Karma’s a bitch when it needs to be. And finally, the cherry on top, my parents and relatives found out my therapist was grooming me. I knew that his sexual advances towards me weren’t necessarily normal, but he has told me countless times I was “one of a kind” and he “thought about me often.” The worst part of him grooming me was people finding out. I could handle that my middle aged therapist (who was actually very cute!) found me attractive and had other plans than me just being a client to him. I didn’t mind it. Being victimized and the stress of taking legal action was a completely different topic. Thank God, my parents decided to stray away from the police. I’ve already had enough encounters with them anyway. Back to my step-dad saying I hit rock bottom, I already knew I hadn’t. Not even a week after he asked, I overdosed on my bedroom floor with Euphoria playing in the background. No fucking joke. This was also not on purpose (surprisingly) and I had been using for a long time before this. My blue leds were on too. My mom found me in my bed; grey-faced, convulsing, while my friend held back tears as she watched death almost swallow me whole. My mom dragged me to the floor, called 911, and started CPR. Mind you I was in a thong and bra during all of this. EMTS eventually arrived at my house and I woke up to lights flashing in my eyes and realizing everyone there has seen me half naked. I cried in the ambulance and apologized to the officer beside me countless times. To be honest, he was probably getting pissed and how much i was whining and the amount of “I’m so sorrys” i was throwing out there. If anyone out there has experienced addiction and thought, “oh! there’s no way that’ll happen to me! i know what i’m doing.” There is always a way. ALWAYS. Especially with hard shit. I’ve been sober since then and hope to continue, but i still haven’t processed it fully. Instead of realizing it was a very serious situation, I just giggle at the thought of it and move on. Anyways, all this crazy shit has sprouted into my life after my first heartbreak. I had been cheated on after I poured everything into a relationship. At the same time, what did I expect out of a teenage boy? I won’t go too in depth about that, it’s always the same story for everyone. Now Im about 2000 miles from home, with my childhood best friends. It’s a nice and quiet break from everything. I just kind of relive the same day and don’t have to worry about being around my triggers. These 3 weeks have been the easiest weeks to get clean. I just hope i stay clean, i honestly never know. Without a therapist, I’m just going to have to figure shit out on my own and hope I’m doing life right. This year I’ll be going into my sophomore year of high school, and I kind of can’t wait for summer to be over. But first I need to be skinny!! I want to be sickly. That’s just kind of what I’m relying on to cope right now. If anyone needs to rant in my dms they are always welcome, I am here for this community! I get it. This is my first update here, I’m not sure if anyone will read it but hi if u do! Thank you for listening!

xoxo

farryn

[ububunes]

Anyways I finished psychedelicha of the black butterfly... Like a week ago? Man I'm slow...

Anyways. Spoilers if... Literally anybody cares about this game. It was truly mid up until the very end but I have to give it some credit for that. Content warning for child death, attempted SA, some baked in misogyny (from the game), and gaslighting (from Karasuba). Now time for:

Basic character info

Beniyuri/MC/Ai

She's the heroine and because of that, she's kind of lacking in personality. Maybe. I'm sorry, at a certain point I started skipping through the side stories... But in the main story she's mostly defined by her willingness to help, her honesty, gullibility, and her fear. She's got some trauma and is fairly stuck in the past.

---------------------

Yamato/Takuya

If you went to his TV tropes page, I'm 95% sure he would have something like "Needs a hug". They aren't wrong, honestly. He's got a short temper and is almost always fighting with Karasuba. His favorite sport is soccer and when he was a kid he would "tease" (frankly, semi-bully at times) MC because he had a crush on her. Don't do that in real life. Monshiro's twin brother.

---------------------

Karasuba/Aki(to?)

My least favorite! He just keeps finding new ways to try and get MC to himself, and will not stop making very uncomfortable advances before calling them jokes. He is the character who figured out Hikage first though, and by his good ending he decides to work on himself and improve with MC. Still not redeemed but congrats! He would get upset if you followed any other dudes on social media, get anxious if you make even a slightly too long phone call or look at your texts too long. Would also beg for your PIN and get sad if he wasn't your lock screen AND homescreen. No thaaaanks.

---------------------

Hikage

Look. This image just goes so hard I HAVE to show it in it's full unaltered glory. He's the evil big bad and tricked the entire cast blah blah yeah he's basic as hell. He's also misogynistic! If I hear him talk about how all women are weak one more time, I frankly might just break down. He's like. So generic anime bad guy that I can't hate them for it, they're just following the assignment.

---------------------

Kagiha/Natsuki

This dudes dead! He's been dead since he was like, eight actually. I'm not sure how ethical it truly is to date him but I also am too tired to care. He's another of the least favs anyways. He made a promise to marry MC when they were kids and man is this dude taking it way too far. I have no idea what his plan is if he 'comes back to life' like Hikage promised since he's been presumed dead for ten years... He's also working with Hikage.

---------------------

Monshiro/Kazuya

Again I'm frankly not too sure on how ethical it would be to date him. He's been in a coma for ten years, since AROUND age 7. He leans on MC for comfort and has been wandering the mansion for ten years waiting to give MC her ribbon back. I don't know what else to say about him, he's not that fleshed out imo... Yamato's twin brother

---------------------

Usagi

Truly the most underdeveloped character. She's Hikage's little sister and the reason he's insane. I would ask her to get him to therapy or to be his therapist but there aren't any therapists here and if he saw her face he would genuinely lose it.

---------------------

The story is honestly pretty much summed up as "repressed memory trauma with otome game action and shooting segments." I'm sure it can be explained better than that but if I'm being honest I'm already starting to forget details. Whoops.

My favorite endings have to be the Yamato true end, the best ending/common route ending (it's literally just called "best end" on the flowchart, I don't know what to tell you), and the secret ending. I find it kind of strange that Hikage and Kagiha (whose names I continually mix up. I'm not very good with names) only have one ending each. I guess you could could the singular bad ending, which is also an honorable mention just for being there and being kind of awful if you accidentally trigger it, as an ending for Hikage since it's (probably) his book, but that sounds lame and doesn't completely check out. I guess you can also count the best ending as Kagiha's true ending but again, seems cheap? But also way better than his default ending where you seemingly lose your mind in the mansion and live in "happy married bliss" with Kagiha.

Probably also a good time to mention that Hikage and Kagiha are both dead.

Basically the whole story goes as follows

The main characters (minus Hikage) go to a summer camp at around ages 6-8. They get warned not to go to the lake because weather changes quickly in the mountains (where the summer camp was, I guess.) They go to the lake, find an abandoned mansion and start exploring, find some glass shards that ARE lore important, just ten years from now. Anyways it starts to rain incredibly hard and the kids desperately try to get to the shore and back to camp. Unfortunately MC and Monshiro both get swept under the water. Kagiha rescues MC first, then Monshiro who is still comatose from the accident ten or so years later. Kagiha ends up drowning and his body is never found*

(*His body is found in the common route ending, but I don't remember any mentions of it in any other endings.)

Ten or so years later, Karasuba, Yamato, and MC meet again after Karasuba and Yamato moved, following the accident. MC is still pretty torn up about Kagiha's death, partially from guilt, and semi-refuses to talk about it. Yamato has been visiting his brother in the hospital every day, also from guilt. Karasuba moved on, and was more concerned with becoming stronger since he could only stand and stare as MC and Monshiro drowned. They go on a Fun Bus Ride!™️ And plummet off the side of a cliff after the driver... Falls asleep? Gets hit by mother nature? I dunno.

They end up comatose and in a mansion that's in a place between life and death. They have to find the shards of a magical kaleidoscope so they can return to earth and Hikage can get his wish fulfilled. Frankly uninteresting romance happens. Yamato turns into a monster and then partially back. This all sounds cool when simply laid out but when you're playing the game multiple times and the slowness of the max speed of the skip button starts to hit? Maaaaaan it sucks. It also makes some sections of the game unintentionally funny because while voices don't play during skip mode, sfx do and it's kind of hard to take Hikage seriously when he's in his evil mode but his walking sounds like someone chopping veggies really fast.

One aspect that really disappointed me was that there was only one real (labeled) bad ending. There are no endings where you all end up trapped in the psychedelicha forever because you can't find the last shard, there's no ending where you give up, no ending where, in a mansion with deadly and aggressive monsters in it, you get killed. That might sound weird and honestly maybe it is but the one bad ending simply being a choice of whether you open a book (bad end) or not (you get to continue playing) feels out of place. Yes some of the characters endings can absolutely be counted as bad ends but... They don't get you the achievement that triggers when you get the 'Bud' ending. (I am unsure as to why it is called that.)

The true endings are all nice. Again Yamato's feels the nicest simply because he gets to apologize to his brother and make amends. He also gets reassurance that no, he isn't an awful person just because he made an admittedly very awful decision as a child.

Karasuba gets shown that he's kind of awful and gets to grow into a better person with MC. Good luck with the relationship.

Monshiro gets to give MC her ribbon back and also gets told that no, you didn't deserve to die instead of Kagiha. Good for him. I'm still conflicted.

The additional scenes unlocked after certain endings were nice too. Seeing Karasuba confront Hikage about his identity was honestly really cool. Seeing what Hikage was up to scheming before the games events was nice. Seeing Kagiha and Monshiro interact was neat, especially since they don't really do that very much. Plus it adds lore.

And finally... The secret ending. You get to make the choice of actually staying in the mansion during the summer camp, keeping everyone safe and alive. It's definitely a nice addition after spending this whole game in danger and having to deal with issues. I honestly had started to wonder why they didn't do that. Like yes they're kids but... None of them had thought of it? Damn. Being able to not traumatize MC was great. Having to deal with four clingy guys? Not so much.

Here's the complete in game flowchart if anybody was curious as to what it looked like!

In conclusion.... Yeah no I can't completely recommend this game. It kind of sucks, it's vita exclusive (I think?), and one of the mechanics forced on you (the butterfly hunt mini games) are kind of jank and annoying to replay and replay for points. And again this game is exceptionally mid. Not good mid, not bad mid, just true neutral mid. Anyways, remember: hooray! Hooray! Beniyuri-chan! Hooray! Hooray! Kagiha-kun!

[ahopkins1965]

What are you curious about?  First, if you have God in your life: You are curious about one thing.  That is if you have been selected to join Him in Heaven.   However, I do have to prepare myself in advance.   This means that I will have to get my mind in the right frame of mind.  I have to start attending Church and read my Bible every single day of the week.  I will have to start praying, and to start being honest with God.   This also means that I have to stop using vulgarity completely.   I have to start participating in Church activities.   I will have to start praying for everyone worldwide on a daily basis.  I have to stay out of trouble.  I have to start becoming a God-Fearing Man.   I will have to become a role model and a mentor for children worldwide.   I might not have enough money.  I need to stop being selfish towards myself and other people.  I need a reality check right now.   I need to read the Bible, and do not be ashamed to do so.  Mom always wanted me to become more honest and truthful with God, Jesus Christ, and with my own neighbors.  I really need to learn how to treat women with respect.   I have to stop being so dogmatic and act like a mature adult man who has common sense.   I have to change myself physically and mentally right now.   I have been clean and sober for 34 years now.  I have been acting like a newcomer inside of an AA Meetings.   I have to start listening to other people with the intent of being their feelings.   I am very sorry to everyone including God and Jesus Christ for maintaining bad behavior.  I really have to stop arguing with other people because it will get me in trouble with God Himself.  I have to change behaviorally and mean it for myself.  I have to grow up like a real Christian Man.   I have to be more respectful and responsible for all of my actions.   I have to start listening to my elders and pay attention to what they are saying to me.   I am called only by God.   I have to start acting like a real Christian Man and a Child of the Most High God.   I need to start saving my money and start paying off my student loans and Tithes and Offerings to my Church.  My Church is Fort McKinley United Methodist Church located in Dayton, Ohio.   My Pastor and Therapist has been more than understanding with me.   I need to learn how to appreciate Jesus Christ, who is My personal Savior.   If it wasn't for Jesus Christ, I would not exist right now.   It is through God's Grace and Mercy that I am still here today.   I have to learn how to accept constructive criticism from people who are making sense to me.   I truly appreciate Jesus Christ Love for me because He first loved me.   Lord Jesus please forgive me of my sins and transgressions and Iniquities right now.  Lord Jesus I am ready to join you in Heaven.   Lord Jesus, will you accept me as I am?  Lord Jesus, my love for You is very strong right now. If You will accept me, I am ready.  In Jesus Name I Pray 🙏 Amen and Amen 🙏 🙌 👏.   God Bless All of You.   I love all of you very much.

[03713]

can i get a hell yeah for being close to panicking at just the first mention of a thunderstorm, hours before it even forms, unable to sleep or relax due to having short but very similar nightmares about worst-case scenarios of what could happen plaguing my damn thoughts. can i get a hell yeah for that. or can i get a hell yeah for requiring one of my dearest plushies to be near me and held tight to my chest, as i struggle to not descend into some form of an anxiety or panic attack still well before the storm at just the sound of wind picking up outside my window that makes me so nervous despite it literally just bein wind that i kinda want to cry. i hate this

[basura-official]

Ew

[fromthewondersystem]

Hi! I know you don't know me but my bf suffers from did and has only recently realized this and started treatment. Older alters of his say that there used to be an inner world and one even told me that they think a 'system collapse' has happened, so I guess my question is what all information can you offer me to understand and help him get his inner world back and restore any communication at all with his alters. Thanks in advance! And sorry if I'm being rude!

hi, i am in no way an expert in innerworlds so this may be a bit tough for me to answer. i can give you what i have though.

i’m also not sure about what a system collapse is, but i know innerworlds can sometimes be less accessible to certain alters or can be harder to get to when something causes an increase in dissociative barriers. i’d try to figure out if there’s something that might have triggered this lack of communication to happen and try to figure out how to deal with it or cope with what’s going on. if ur bf has a therapist, it would be good to talk to them about it, even if it’s not about the did/innerworld disappearance, but about what most likely was the cause. if it has to do with undiscovered trauma tho, he should not go digging into that.

he could try reaching out in his mind to specific alters, see if they’ll respond. he could also try to build an innerworld manually; not all innerworlds automatically exist, some are made. i have a few pictures on my phone from a post i saw maybe a year ago with some innerworld building tips. here they are:

also, i recently made a post on system communication and journaling for summer system education week. it’s got a lot of tips and resources to go with them. here’s the post

hope this helps, i wish u and ur bf good luck with this