#i cant talk about it put loud bc only my mom watches this show and she hasn't watched s7 anyways

[buckleydiazmp4]

it's 1:30 am i have to get up early but i am not even the slightest bit sleepy. how can i be. they made him canonically bi this is no time for unconsciousness this is time for rolling around in my bed like a feral creature

[ddejavvu]

ohh i have SUCH a controversial jennifer jareau opinion. and this is probably gonna be more like an essay. i wish i could say i was sorry.

everyone always says theyre anti jj slander, which is fine ofc, but just weird bc i NEVER see anyone slandering her. in my 3 years in the fandom, ive seen it happen maybe 5 times total, which sucks because she deserves so. much. more. hate.

(spoilers for *that* jeid plotline, as well as some other things)

in season 7, spencer tells her that she has mean girl vibes and she replies "i was a nice girl, especially to guys like you" which ALWAYS pissed me off because she literally just confirmed what he said? and everyone acts like it was a funny joke. she said that shit with her whole chest and meant it, and it wouldnt be *that* big of a deal if it was the only time. but shes consistently mean to him throughout the show, ignoring him, walking away, etc. spencer isnt even the only one shes like this to. and she just has a sense of superiority, idk how to describe it. just by the way she talks and interacts with those around her, you can tell. (while we're on that note, she also ignores her privileged a LOT. maybe not all the time, but theres been multiple times where she acts like she went through hell to get where she is. other than her sister passing, she had it completely easy. in terms of resources, opportunities, etc., she was basically born with a golden spoon in her mouth.)

in s14 when she confesses to spencer that shes always been in love with him, it just makes my blood boil. obviously he had been over her a long time (imo), but that was something she should've kept to herself bc it just brought alllll those feelings back to the surface. not to mention that hes the godfather of her children, and shes married, and will probably (definitely) doesnt know how she feels. thats literally emotional cheating on her part, even though reid didnt reciprocate it, it was still wrong of her to be that close to him without will knowing how she really felt.

there are other things i dont like abt her too, but those are the main things and im trying to keep this as short as possible. but i literally cant stand her, shes by far my least favorite character, and everyone acts like shes an angel sent from heaven, when really shes just a privileged bitch.

i like JJ a lot (i want her to be my mom </3) but i do agree with several of your points - she's definitely not the worst character, each and every character has a list of flaws that we could make, so this by no means makes her the worst, but it does make me angry <3

i just rewatched that 'mean girl' episode!! she doesn't even hesitate before saying 'guys like you', which, you're totally right, means he was right, and she was definitely a mean girl in high school. or even if she didn't say any of it out loud, she was still silently judging 'guys like him' and in high school you can always tells who's silently judging you. they're teenagers. they're not silent about it. the nasty looks they give you?? oh man. but i do think that the blame for ignoring spencer needs to be placed on all of the team members, because they do it all the time too, it's not just her. she has some pretty bad moments with him, but it's definitely something they all do and she shouldn't take the full blame

lmao don't talk about jeid. the writers actually deserve the death penalty for that, god it was so nasty and weird. i know that it was something she confessed in the heat of the moment, like she wasn't sure she was gonna make it out alive and didn't wanna die without saying it but ??? WHY WOULD YOU PUT IT ON HIM TO DIE THREE SECONDS AFTER FINDING OUT ??? like great it's off your chest but now he's gonna spend the (very short) rest of his life thinking about it?? AND THEN THEY DIDN'T EVEN DIE LMFAO SO HE WAS JUST STUCK WITH THAT !! and yeah!! will!! what about will!! or her kids!! it was so... writers i'm watching you...

one scene of hers that really pissed me off was in reid's kidnapping two-parter in s2 (the hankel incident) where she was almost attacked by those rabid (?) dogs and she shot them and she's obviously shaken up and she tries finding reid and realizes what happened and she feels so much guilt for splitting up with him - which was not her fault, she didn't know and should not be held responsible for what happened to him - that she started trying to make other people mad at her?? she cornered derek who was grieving and stressed at the loss of his best friend and they're both sleep deprived and she says something like 'admit it, you hate me, you think it's my fault' AND I???? GIRL. he is being so nice to you?? he was literally like oh honey if you need time off i know you're really shaken up and we can take care of this and and and AND SHE WAS LIKE oH yeah suRe just admit it i'm the worSt everybody hATEs mE- I WAS... this is not about you. go get therapy for the dog attack that you just almost suffered?? do not stand around a crime scene and pester the victim's best friend and delay the investigation because you're feeling guilty. go talk to someone about it. take a few days off. again, i totally get that she was shaken up and hopped up on adrenaline, but everyone told her to go get some rest and she was like no i think i will make myself the problem instead <3

all of that being said i still love her </3 i was not kidding when i say that i wish she was my mom holy shit i would have loved to grow up as her kid but she definitely has her flaws just like the rest of the BAU, and logical, critical breakdowns of a characters flaws aren't slandering, they're analysis, so i think everybody needs to stop shitting on people who criticize or analyze their faves lmao

send me your unpopular fandom opinions

[madeoftwinklingstars]

ok tumblrinas are u ready. btvs live blog go

1.1

LMFAO can’t get over the 90’s ass voice over in the beginning literally making me laugh out loud

heehee intro as a whole …. with the rock like yasss slay

guys the jew representation in this show is off the charts. sarah michelle gellar and the other main character is willow rosenberg? no one ever talks about this. this is a jew show irl

alyson is so cute it’s so funny that they try to make her “nerdy” with a shitty outfit like. what???? she’s still like. so pretty.

meet cute mome with buffy and xander .. classic

also buffy’s first day outfit is soooo cute n so is she. love

xander’s sheer shirt is like boygirl chic supreme. loveee again

GERM WAREFARE????????? WHAT

free my bitch willow she aint done nothing but be sustainable

love him already (giles) why is he like this

giles is boygirl supreme actually i’ve decided or maybe he’s just british

GIRL REALLY THOUGHT HE COULD PLACE DOWN A BOOK OF VAMPYR AND NOT FREAK OUT????

sometimes joss whedon writes shit and like. u just have to sit and think

did people talk like this in the 90s

i love how buffy is like fuck this shit like yes girl fuck this shit

no bc the way that it must be so hard to hold this secret and have to watch her destroy not just her life but her mom’s and everyone around her’s…

yasss girl live in ur dark cave, chant ominously and give us nothing 😍😍

“hi! im an enormous slut!” pissing myself

if this was me and i was 16 i would not be allowed to go to a club. like? girl do u care abt ur daughter at all?

this dude in his velvet coat….. and being destroyed by buffy instantly… yeah… yeah…

if this is the place to be in sunnydale i think i’d just never leave my house if i lived there

WHEN DOES WILLOW BECOME A LESBIAN 😭😭 i know she does i just can’t wait

ok but jesse literally can’t catch a hint like leave her alone

FREE MY BITCH WILLOW make her a lesbian now so she doesn’t fall for this vampire dick

“what is your childhood trauma” the way i have fully said these words before but in an entirely different context

the vampire makeup is sooo funny tho i think we need to bring back practical effects exclusively so we can have gold like this again

i know by young and fresh they mean virgins and i just don’t know why they don’t just say it

kinda love how they chose this dark ass place to hide the shitty fight choreography and makeup

thinking about how joss whedon went on to write parts of the MCU and u can literally hear the quips starting now LMFAO

love the overarching plot explanation now… we need that structure yasss

1.2

wow literally forgot this was a 2 parter but also they put their whole pussy into this shit

the amount of christian mythology here does give it negative points for being a jew show :/

dirty cave back 😍😍 we love to see it… candle lit, large throne, perfect for all

ALSO PISSING MYSELF WITH HOW THE VAMPIRES ARE LISPING WITH THE FUCKING TEETH IN THEIR MOUTHS 😭😭😭 LITERALLY LMFAO

this show is soooo acab like yes the police cant do anything and only come with guns 😍

this show is actually so feminist because the 4 main protagonists are all women

fuck this guy (the principal)

i love her (buffy)

the cross is so ugly but i know they had to make it this big to show up on the shitty fucking quality of the tvs in the 90s

velvet coat guy’s name is angel and it’s like they want u to trip over the plot

sooo true xander i would also skip chem class

when she’s experienced and is willing to cut someone’s head off with an x-acto knife

fuck that guy (cordelia)

i love her (willow)

girlies RUN….

NOT THE LISPS AGAIN 😭😭

jesse is infinitely more interesting as a vampire and im happy they freed him from being boring

giles in rolled sleeves is strangely attractive to me. actually i think i just think giles is weirdly hot in general. maybe it is because he is british.

phantom of the opera ass score like DUNDUN DUN DUN

who wrote that essay about the inherent sexuality of vampires. yeah… yeah…

“the thtarths themthelveths will hide!” please

i do feel so bad for buffy tho like fr society if she just could be normal

crying over the heads of garlic just there in her supply box. like how would be use those to stop them 😭😭

ok but like. is them going to a club and drinking the drinks there implying that they are always drunk at the bronze at 16 year olds??? it’s so weird

cordelia needs to listen to goodbye earl by the chicks and i think that would fix her

90s censorship laws be like. no blood allowed! but yes to 16 year olds at clubs!

ok maybe i do rly like this show like a lot

buffy should be included in discussions of feminism fr like she walked so y’all could run

giles immediately getting taken down by a vampire is truly the most camp and hilarious thing he could do

the master lying and screaming on the floor no is so me core!

angel shut the fuck up have faith

u averted the apocalypse for now

i love how buffy has friends like :’) yay she’s not alone anymore

[palbabor-writes]

dude uh so like dabi but as a father... like he would never but like no one day he gets left with this kid and he's not gonna abandon it bc he cant idk i just want to see dabi as a parental unit trying not to be a bad parent

lol, ppl ask me asks and i respond with a feature freaking film worth of words.  (//▽//) warnings: adult language, angst, mild spoilers for current manga chapters: 290 - 291

words: 3915 

notes: I answered this a little differently. It’s more of a longing for what could have been, rather than a kid of his own sort of thing. But, Dabi does his best damn it. Also, yeah, yeah, it’s another Greek title. I cannot be STOPPED. but i prolly should be. Not beta edited, so all mistakes are mine, and mine alone.

Pónos 

ponos /ˈpoʊˌnɒs/ or ponus /ˈpoʊnəs/ noun  Ancient Greek: Πόνος Pónos  the personification of hardship and toil

There’s a loud clattering noise that’s echoing along the polished floors and walls of the Meta Liberation Army’s base. 

Dabi hates these long hallways. They remind him of some kinda tomb, with all that reverberation and all those gleaming surfaces. They’re perfect for elongating and stretching voices and sounds. 

So whatever the fuck that racket is, it’s not like he’s going to be able to avoid it. He’d need to turn around to do that and he’s not about to fucking turn heel and retrace his steps. Besides, it would take him twice as long to go the other way. Nah, this path is easier, despite the looming annoyance of the commotion.

 He rounds a corner and catches sight of a young woman. 

She’s struggling with something as she reaches into her shoulder bag, and her back twists awkwardly as she leans both forward and sideways. Dabi can’t get a good look at her from here. But, he reasons, he also doesn’t care enough to bother with a second, closer, glance. Nope, all he’s gotta do is slip past her and he can be on his way. 

“Reo-- Reo! Please keep still. I need to get to my phone…” The woman’s voice sounds strained and that odd pattering noise that he’s been hearing since he stepped toward this hallway hasn’t stopped either. If anything, it’s worse. Is it her quirk? Is there somebody behind her? Does she have one of those remote talking devices? Like that the ones that the Doc gave to the League before all this fucking cult bullshit started. What-

Dabi’s thoughts wander to a screeching halt as a boy bumps into his shins. He blinks at the sensation and stutters to a stop, his eyes glinting at the small form. The kid, who looks about four or five, stumbles backwards and cranes his head, looking up at this new discovery he’s run into. 

The boy studies him and, for a brief moment, Dabi worries that his face might spook the kid bad enough to send him into a sobbing and crying fit. Dabi’s not exactly the easiest thing to look at now. But, the kid seems ok with gawping at him, his violet eyes goggled and wondering. 

“Reo-” the boy’s mother repeats, replacing her phone and scanning the hallway for her rogue offspring. “I--Uh, there you are! I’m sorry...Oh, you’re one of those new generals. I’m afraid I don’t remember your name. Ooh, oh my gosh, now that you’re here, would you mind watching him for a moment? I’ve gotta run something back to Skeptic…”

That woman is saying something but Dabi’s too involved in his strange standoff with the boy. Neither he, nor the kid, seem to have the wherewithal to pull their gazes away. No, they both just watch each other, the former maintaining his aloof scowl and the latter is putting on an amazing show of raw fascination. 

“So, just don’t let him get up to too much trouble and I’ll be right back. Won’t be more than a minute.”  

Huh?

Dabi whips his head up, suddenly realizing what’s being asked of him. Like fuck he’s gonna watch this kid. Wait...where did she go?

He twists and turns, his cerulean eyes flashing up and down the sterile hallway, but there’s no sign of her. What the hell? How can someone dematerialize that quickly? He didn’t even say yes, for fucks sake. What a negligent, irresponsible parent she is, to just leave her kid like this with a complete stranger. Pfft, stranger feels a bit weak, honestly. Nah, Dabi’s a walking, talking freakshow. Nothing about him looks safe or dependable. There’s a pull on his dark pants and he automatically shakes his leg against the sensation, agitated. What now? 

Ah.

Junior is blinking up at him, those chubby hands wrinkling the rough fabric between his tiny digits. “Hi,” he beams, his pearly baby teeth straight and gleaming, “I’m Reo!”

“Yeah,” Dabi scoffs, knocking the kid’s hands away. “I heard. Where did your, er, mom go?”

“What’s your name?” Reo prattles, following Dabi as he skulks a little ways down the hallway, his brow furrowed and shoulders tense. Now what is he going to do? He could leave, tell the kid to stay put and go about his business. He doesn’t have time for this, after all.

“Hey!” Reo calls and Dabi turns at the slightly frantic note in the child’s voice, his eyes sharp. 

“Whadda’ want kid? I’m trying to find your mom.” 

“I said my name is Reo-”

“And I said I heard you. Tch, you’re so loud there’s no way half of the building didn’t hear you,” Dabi snaps, looming over the little boy, his mouth pressing into a deep frown. 

“I told you my name, so..so now you gotta tell me yours,” Reo scolds, those violet eyes shining. Dabi can see that the kid’s tiny frustration is rising at the thought of some adult being so rude as to not answer his newly engrained social niceties. 

“Hmph,” Dabi snorts, a low laugh puffing out of his lips. “The name’s Dabi.”

Reo digests that, his nose wrinkling as he mouths the unfamiliar name to himself, like he’s wanting to get it just right when he speaks it aloud. It’s kinda cute, Dabi muses. You know, in a stupid sort of way.

“D- Dadi?” Reo mimics, stumbling over that all important ‘b’ in Dabi’s name.

“What? No. It’s DABI. It’s got a ‘B’ in it. Like, uh, b as in, uh, bear. You know what a bear is, yeah?”

“A bear?” Reo asks, biting his lip at the strange change of topic. “What about a bear?”

“You got my name wrong, kid. It’s Dabi, not DaDi. My name has a ‘b’ not a ‘d.’ Try again,” Dabi groans, sinking to his haunches and praying that this kids mom will rematerialize any goddamn second. 

“Dadi,” Reo mimics, still fumbling. 

“Ugh,” Dabi sucks his teeth and begins to stand again. 

“Hey! Pick me up?” Reo requests, his arms lifting, stocky fingers clenching and unclenching into his palms, opening and closing in a repetition of a familiar demand. 

“Pick you up?” Dabi repeats, incredulous. What the fuck is wrong with today? The only thing that could make this worse is someone seeing this odd performance.

“I’m not gonna pick you up,” Dabi growls, his lips pursing at the kid. “You’re just fine where you are. Besides, don’t kids like you need to practice walking? How old are you anyway?”

“Five,” Reo chirrups, puffing his chest out, like he’s expecting a rainfall of praise to fall on him now that he’s verbally acknowledged that he is indeed, a big boy.

“That’s too bad, kid. If you’re five, you’re definitely old enough to walk under your own power,” Dabi snorts, bemused by Reo’s chipper attitude. Doesn't that get tiring? All that smiling and pacing that he’s doing? Dabi’s never had much experience with little kids, well, other than his own contact with his younger siblings, but they were never this...chatty.

“Awe,” Reo whines, his head falling, little chin bumping as it hits his collarbone dejectedly. Dabi shakes his head at the dramatic reaction. Sulking is better than crying, he reasons, turning his head to look for the boy’s mother again. She said it would only take a minute? The fuck was she?

“Hey, kid. Where were you and your mom before you came here?”

There’s a strange, static-like quiet that follows Dabi’s question. That’s weird. He would have figured that his new query would have broken the boy out in another rash of talkative excitement. So for him to be…

Wait. 

Dabi turns back and his eyes scan the newly barren hallway for the boy. The fuck? Where did he go? His gaze is still whisking frantically when he spots the heel of Reo’s shoe disappearing beyond the next corner. Fucking wonderful.

He paces after the boy, his long legs pulling him quickly along. Again, he wonders why he gives two shits. It’s not his kid, not his responsibility. Yet there’s some nagging pressure that keeps beating at the back of his mind. It’s likely some pieces of a fragmented lesson that had been taught to him long ago. Back when he wasn’t like this. Long before he’d made the decision that sent him on this mindless trajectory, lingering in the obsession of his pent up rage and hurt.  

You’re the eldest. 

Take care of your sister. 

Easy, he’s still a baby. That’s right, hold him like that. You’re such a good brother. 

You’re the one who he can go to when he needs help.

Thank you, Touya. You did so, so well! I’m sorry I had to leave for a bit, but thank you for watching him. 

It’s a big job, and one that you’ll always have, so, can you do it?

You’re their big brother. They look up to you.

Look! She’s happy to see you, Touya!

Dabi snarls at those little flashes of memory, his teeth gritting. No one needs him. Fuck, he’d be more likely to kill them than help them now. Or, at least that’s what he keeps telling himself. Drilling it in, over and over, until he can repeat that vitriol like it’s some kinda twisted prayer. He’s not that boy anymore and he can never, ever go back. He’s made sure of that. 

“Hey! Hey kid! Get back here! You little shit!” 

A loud, male voice is booming up ahead and Dabi jogs the last few steps, his head already uplifted and searching as he rounds the corner. There’s a tall, unfamiliar man in the next hallway and he’s looking away, watching as Reo sprints from him. 

“Fuck, man. Why you gotta yell at him?” Dabi scolds, his cerulean eyes glaring. The man whirls around and Dabi notes the source of his ire. There’s a large stain, bleeding against his crisp white button up and an upturned mug is clutched in a tight fist. Kid must have bumped into him and knocked his coffee out. Well, that fucking sucks, but it’s no reason to freak out at the little guy. He’s five for fuck’s sake. Not like he did it on purpose. 

“He burned me! He ran around that corner and smack into me! Control your kid, you ass! I know you’re one of those hoity toity new generals but you gotta--”

“He’s not my kid,” Dabi snaps, already shoving past the blustering idiot. If he hurries, he can snatch the boy up before he gets too much farther. 

“You sure are running after him like he is!” 

The taunt chases him as Dabi stalks away and it makes him grind his teeth again. Doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter, doesn’t matter, he repeats, all he’s gotta do is get the kid and wait for the mom. Besides, he’s in too deep now. He can’t just abandon him. Fuck, with his luck, he’d run into the mom before he ran into Reo again.

The next hallway leads to one of the many common rooms. 

Dabi, realizing this, begins to jog again, suddenly desperate to catch Reo before he wanders into even more members of this crazy cult. Or worse, he gulps, a member of the League. He’d never live it down if the kid bumped into Compress or Shigaraki. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

As he skids along the next turn, Dabi catches sight of the kid. He’s wavering beside the double doors of the common room and he looks distinctly lost, his dark head turning every few seconds, those violet eyes of his wide. 

“Oi! Reo! Stop running,” Dabi calls, already lowering himself to a kneeling position, his long, mangled arms outstretched. He’s hoping he’s painting some kinda welcoming picture with this gesture and not just creating a terrifying pantomime of comfort.

Reo looks back and he lets out a little squeal of recognition and delight. Excited he is finally going to be picked up. His shoes tap loudly against the tiles as he dashes into Dabi’s oddly warm embrace. 

Once he’s got a good grip on the boy, Dabi rises to his feet, keeping the kid’s body securely against his. At first, Reo protests the tight hold, his back bowing and squirming, but Dabi stills him with a long, hard, stare.

“Don’t do that,” Dabi chastises, wincing against the pull on his marred skin. 

“Oh! Does it hurt?” Reo asks, carefully bringing his swinging feet to a standstill, noting the grimace of pain on Dabi’s scarred face.

“Yeah,” Dabi confirms, shifting Reo to his hip so he can free up his other arm to adjust a pinching staple. “My skin ain’t exactly healthy. Now, let’s get you back to your mom before she finds out that you fuc-- I mean...that you dashed off like that. Give people a heads up next time, huh? Making me run all over the compound after--”

“Oh! Who’s that you’re holding?”

“Gosh, he looks just like you! With that dark hair and those bright eyes of his. Is that your son?”

Fuck. Shit. Fuck.

Dabi tosses a glare over his shoulder, but the two women keep walking toward him, cooing at Reo’s pleased little face. One of them reaches up and ruffles the boy's hair and Dabi instinctively takes a step back, a snarl lifting his lips over his white teeth.

“He’s not my kid,” Dabi corrects, for what feels like the umpteenth time today. It’s only the second, but twice is two times too many. 

These women are being ridiculous. They don’t look that much alike. He’s just got dark hair, that’s all. If they knew what color Dabi’s hair really was they wouldn’t even make that connection. With his true coloring, Reo would be another kid and Dabi would be some fucking freak who’s left holding him. He’s not this kid's anything, least of all his protector. 

It’s not his job to look after this half pint, nor is it his job to care about him. Even if he reminds him of some sliver of what was, what could have been. No, Dabi is just some schmuck who somehow stumbled into this absurdity. It would be easy to unwind those trusting arms and lower this kid back to the ground, he’s not sure why he’s still holding him. He should...he should put him down...He... 

For some reason, that last thought makes his heart squeeze, pressing an irregular beat against his breast. He shakes his head at the sensation, burying whatever bubble of emotion that is trying to rise back down, pressing it deep, smothering and covering until he feels normal again. 

“He’s right! I’m not. Because he’s Dadi!” Reo confirms, simultaneously standing up for his new, haphazard, caretaker and throwing him under an oncoming proverbial bus in the same breath. Goddamn it all.

“That’s so sweet! Your son is beyond adorable!”

“He’s not…” Dabi begins, but bites his tongue. What good is it doing him anyway? These flunkies of the Meta Liberation are just fawning over Reo anyway. He’s honestly stunned they’re still talking to him at all. 

As they’re tickling and petting at the boy, a sudden thought springs into his mind. Actually, this might not be too bad. If he can get one of them to take the kid, he can fucking slink away, his responsibility finished, job done. 

“Oi, one of you can take him. He’s waiting for his mom. She said something about meeting with that Skeptic dic-- guy.”

“You want us to watch your son?” One of the girl’s questions, her head tilting at his demand. “Wouldn’t you rather wait for her yourself? You don’t know us and, well, not that we’d do anything bad...but that feels strange. Besides, you’re doing a great job! Look how happy he is. The two of you are so cute!”

Amazing. 

Apparently, Dabi, despite his hardened and rough persona, one that he has cultivated and built up for years, mind you, could now add, “cute,” to that resume of terror that he is building. 

Sighing, Dabi tries a more direct approach. “You seem to like him a lot, so just keep an eye on him until his mom comes back. It’s not hard. He likes being held, so just, er, hold him.”

Reo, sensing that he’s about to be deposited out of Dabi’s warm grasp, begins to wiggle again, his hands clinging to Dabi’s skin. He’s trying to be gentle, remembering Dabi’s earlier warning, his small digits tapping rather than digging, but he’s still scrabbling against the pull.

The woman clicks her tongue and smiles, tucking some of her long hair behind her ear. “Your son is so precious! He must really love you. Look, Han, isn’t this kid is the sweetest thing you’ve ever seen!” Her friend chuckles and agrees and the cheerful sound makes Dabi seethe. 

“Like I told you, he ain’t my kid. Now knock the wax outta your ears and take him,” Dabi snarls, still pushing Reo outward, hoping beyond hope that this calamity will just fucking end. 

“Dadi,” Reo pouts, his nose wrinkling as he burrows his face into Dabi’s arm, his skin hot against Dabi’s purple flesh.

“If he’s not your kid,” the woman named Han says, propping a fist on her hip, “why does he keep calling you daddy?”

“He’s not calling me that,” Dabi grumbles, his eyes lingering on Reo’s distressed slump. “The kid can’t say my name, which is Dabi. For some fucking reason the “b” is alluding him.”

“Fucking?” Reo questions, his brilliant purple eyes lifting, searching Dabi’s deep blue gaze. When he doesn’t get an answer, he repeats the word, lingering on those harsh syllables a little longer than he needs to. God, Dabi thinks, pulling Reo back to him, trying to muffle the boys bewildered tests of his new word. This is beyond ridiculous.

“Uh-oh,” another, male, voice resounds. Dabi scowls at the newcomer, watching as he steps beside the women, his eyes widened in mock concern. “That your kiddo?” He asks, his brow arching at Dabi’s now openly hostile form. 

“Fuc-- Again? I gotta answer this again?” Dabi snaps, shifting Reo back to his hip, just above his belt. “No. No, he is not mine.”

“Sure about that?” the man quizzes. “He’s sure got your hair and, uh, your vulgarity down.” 

“He’s that woman’s...Look, his mother went to go see that Skeptic bastard. So, you wanna help me out here? Any of you idiots want to do something useful? Hmm? Go into that big meeting room, the one past the common area and get her. I bet that’s where she went. When you see her...tell her, her kid is going wild. Stop...stop looking at me like that or I’ll torch you where you fuc-- where you stand.”

Instead of being cowed by his threat, the Meta Liberation Assholes just laugh, the three of them leaning against each other as they heave with their amusement. And Reo? Well, he’s seemingly amused by all the ruckus, giggling and murmuring little nothings into Dabi’s skin, nuzzling into Dabi’s inhuman warmth. Dabi feels that strange tugging at his heart again and in his anger and distant horror, he spews more rage onto the trash that’s daring to chortle so openly in front of him.

“Goddamn it, I’ll make each of you pay for this you...you stupid--”

“Dabi?”

Can a hole open up under him? That would be absolutely perfect and he’d be so, so grateful. He cranes his neck and catches sight of the last person he wanted to see. Fucking, Twice. His costume is making those white eyes of his comically wide and his hands lift to clap at his face, always dramatic and overblown to the last.

“Who is that sweet little boy? The hell are you doing with that child?!?”

“He’s--”

“It’s his son!” The ‘Han’ woman calls, still clutching her sides, her eyes wet from her mirth.

“No,” Dabi groans, his head dropping lamely. He wants nothing more than to fry each and everyone of these fucking pieces of shit. The desire is so strong he can feel the creeping of heat that’s rising in his palms and tickling up his piercings, scalding his skin against the metal. No, he scolds himself, he can’t do that. Not with Reo in his arms. He’s gotta be careful. He can’t hurt the kid. It’s not his fucking fault he’s been trapped in the care of a monster like him. 

Dabi gasps at his sudden, protective instincts. The fuck? This kid is nothing to him. Nothing. He doesn’t remind him of anyone. No, he’s nothing like his little brothers, all questions and sweet, brief hugs. He’s not...he’s not…

Reo’s hum of agitation breaks Dabi from his swirling emotions. The boy tries to lift his legs away from Dabi’s hips, his arms wrapping around Dabi’s neck, suddenly unsure and starting to whimper. 

“It’s too hot,” he complains, his voice small and soft in Dabi’s ear.

“I know,” Dabi concedes, taking another deep breath, trying to still that rushing rage that is lingering in the back of his mind. “Sorry kid, it should stop in a minute.”

“Ok,” Reo nods, his black hair mingling with Dabi’s spiky tendrils. 

Twice has stepped forward and he’s standing beside Dabi, his head cocked, looking from the shivering boy to Dabi’s haggard expression. “He does look a lot like you,” Twice ponders, his fingers tracing his chin meditatively. There’s something about Twice that Reo is bothered by and his face falls into the hollow of Dabi’s neck and shoulder, straining his body against Dabi, away from the black and red suited man that’s beside Dabi’s elbow.  

“Fuc-- Piss off, Twice,” Dabi growls, his blue eyes narrowing and hardening as he pats comfortingly at Reo’s back, twisting from Twice’s curious stare. “You’re freaking the kid out. Hey! Hey, don’t you assholes have some bootlicking to do?” Dabi snaps, his eyes lifting to the gaggle of MLA members, who are still giggling and whispering across from him. And, just as those words leave his lips, Reo’s mother, finally, finally returns. 

“Oh thank you!” She coos, raising her arms to Reo and peeling him away from Dabi. To Dabi’s shock, Reo still shakes his head, his arms retightening around Dabi’s tense neck.

“Oooh, he’s taken a liking to you I see!” 

“You gotta let me go, kid,” Dabi whispers into Reo’s ear, unlacing his little arms. Reo whines and pouts as Dabi presses him back to his mother, a sigh of relief shuddering from his mismatched lips. Thank fucking God. Now he can have this woman tell all of those shits that he’s not this boy’s father...wait...what the fuck? Oh...oh, now they all leave.

The MLA lackeys are drifting away, walking in a tight bunch as they re-enter the common area, soft grins still lingering on Dabi. And Twice? Twice is snickering openly and making his way down an adjacent hallway, no doubt off to tell Toga what he’s seen.

“Thanks again. Looks like you did a great job,” Reo’s mother repeats, shifting her son to a better position, trying to quiet his frantic scrabbling, his small arms still reaching, struggling for Dabi.

“Dadi!” Reo cries, a few tears falling from his soft face as he’s walked away. In another heartbeat, they’re both gone and all Dabi has left of that strange little kid is the lingering sting and warmth of his embrace on his burned skin.

Notes: Dabi is a grump. Or is he? o(TヘTo)

Tags: @spicy-skull, @xwildskullx, @evesmores

[misterbitches]

i had the misfortune of finally watching/getting through what happened in whatever episode where he gets raped so im gonna talk about it and tag it cos that's what a bitch fuckin feels like, got it? i do what i want aint no limit bad ass bitch aint never been timid. woopsie realized i got the nicknames confused oh well lmao

it's just logistically and plot wise like there's literal plot holes in this and i'm taking the production and set-up into account along with the actual content and development. im an ARTIST OKAY im jk i mean i am and i am pretentious and terrible but look. i didnt get that degree and im not in a house worth of debt for nothing ok. it's called writing on tumblr about my grievances of shows that dont matter and do not respect me as a fat black american woman either so it is my fault yet here i am.

anyway it was worse than i imagined and their talk after (with chengren) was even worse. that's what i mean about making the lines their own (the actors) bc teng teng sounded like a straight up motherfucking moron and im like

bECAUSE IT'S HIM EVEN THO IM LIKE WHAT THE FUCK DID U JUST SAY U STUPID BITCH? but then it's like awwww and they also care about his wellbeing obviously??? but no? but it's like ok still teng teng said it even if it's stupid because he is a character and charles puts that forth. the people that fail the most to do that are xing si's family but that's not the actors fault because it's the literal material. you're like wait what but you just said...?

so i know they have no script editors i guess i think i find this season ACTUALLY fascinating because of just how egregious it is. i also went back and watched history: obsessed which i thought i liked because of their chemistry even though god the production....but i tried rewatching it and i was like wow this is worse than i remembered and the production issues were even worse because some of the music was SO LOUD AND BAD HOLY FUCK and their whole rship isssssss a sight to behold lmao

so man i guess it really is the power of anson/charles. which is good cos we love to see it...sort of but also a lot.

i honestly....because i've been able to pay attn more to the aftermath of the rape going back and putting it into more context and focusing (just barely lmao) is hm even worse. the inconsistencies are insane. it's not even just about the act but the writers have zero idea where they are going because they have no interest in exploring it. but the way in which it happens is like fascinating. yong jie literally thinks he owns xing si and it doesn't matter if he was kissing him or not or asked for a kiss on the lips (which dude what the fuck? i'll get to that) because he was plied with "extremely strong drinks" and his mom knew about it....which girl congrats you're an accomplice to the rape of your son by your other son?

but first of all...the kissing thing. in what fucking world would he (xing si) want that unless he thought he (yong jie) was someone else. i can't say their attraction is evident because we are being lead by this team to think so; they create this false sense of sensuality already so to me that signifies that they never intended for them to have a bond as brothers. it just feels cheap and fucking lazy (which it is.) even if he did, which doesn't make sense considering the context THEY CONSTRUCTED, it wouldn't matter because he was so fucking drunk which.... at that point nothing is fun, you feel sick, who wants sex like that? does he not have whiskey dick? did they have a condom? was it not painful for him considering? even if this was something to easily get over like was the dick good? it couldn't have been. and then, on top of that, there's the fact that you can change your mind or whatever but also that people do get aroused in these situations bc it is human nature (that's if they can literally get aroused which if the drinks were allegedly sooooo strong that nigga would be out so....again like even practically here it doesnt add up. have these people ever been drunk? if not, write what you know girl. cos sometimes it's like i think some of u r trying to be cool when u dont have 2 b lmao)

so yong jie coming on to him previously may be seen as like push-and-pull but here's the thing. right after it happens (the rape and it's rape so call it that you'll be okay) xing si gets up and goes home and is terrified and upset. he acts like what we have seen or even felt after a violation. he's scared, clutching his bag, it's like...you know...decently coming off as truly distressing (the actor isn't bad at all and i like that he's dark. i just massively hate this for him but hey at least he can show some chops.) like honestly man that fucking sucks and hurts to see. if we've been there we feel it. or part of it is realizing belatedly what happened. a lot of times that drop in your stomach is the worst.

but somehow for some reason, to which i cannot understand, the three of them begin to talk as if xing si pressured him? which maybe i missed something and that is possible—dont feel like going back to look—but that also made no sense. like what kind of false memory is this? why would he think he wasn't willing? and if he thought yong jie wasn't and that he pressured him how does he remember like...anything about the sex?!?!??!? besides waking up and being with him. like i guess he felt yong jie's MASSIVE DONG imprint but ??!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!??!? MAKE IT MAKE SENSE!!!!!

god then the logic of the top/bottom thing is like i said i wasnt going to get into it but it's actually really funny. this whole thing was hilarious. honestly because I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT MEANS. he could have totally raped him in that way but how did you get to this CONCLUSION FROM THAT??????? BY YOUR LOGIC THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS? IF HE IS THE BOTTOM AND PENETRATION IS THE ONLY FORM OF TRUE CONSUMMATION AND RAPE BECAUSE APPARENTLY, BASED ON ANATOMY, IF YOU HAVE A DICK IN UR BUTT UR A GIRL THEN HOW. DOES. THIS. MAKE. SENSE. AND THEN

AND THEN

AND THEN

AND THEN

this whole stupid conversation happens so we get to the conclusion that xing si violated him ok cool but that means that something is wrong. that is the CONCLUSION WE CAME TO A SECOND AGO?

also the other rapist is a villain and muren isn't in love with him so, once again, you're breaking the rules of your own world about acceptability which is why most of this is absolutely mind bogggglinG that iit's fuckign comical. like i actually when i can stomach it start laughing or my jaw is slack because it's so insulting as a viewer because there is like 0 logical followthrough.

because whatshisface barges in, kisses him in front of his friends without permission, then says whether you were willing or not which is hm. at that point how u gonna change that around but let's not bother with logic here. i am simply here to point out how this makes no sense according to the rules they set up even outside of the basic rule of life which is hm dont rape people maybe.

so now we know xing si was raped, they believe he was raped, he himself believes he was raped, and whatshisface literally says he doesn't care even if he was willing (he wasn't) so he admits to rape. i don't believe in the police and i hate them (BL industry needs the cops but dont get me down that road) but no one...thought to go?

because according to history 4 logic nothing matters so im sure if he went to the police you could handwave the homophobia since there's no actual context for anything besides their whimsy. but they dont want to do that because they aren't interested in an arc of growth; redemption isn't possible unless he is removed from the family but again no work on thinking this through or thinking about the victim's feelings. because gay sex? who fucking knows. supposedly progressive taiwanese writers of gay shit (like how supposedly progressive the world is. as in it is not and this behavior is the norm and bl perpetuates that) can't think of transformative justice?

and then they gave bad advice so we wont acknowledge that because teng teng doing anything wrong/stupid is frequent but hurts me and also that storyline is not real so i pretend they are not there outside of this post

so all of this is just straihgt up clownery now because it's fucking absurd like logically, practically, human-wise. the kissing thing is inconsequential but it was such a lazy cheap way out lmao cos they really wanted it to seem consensual but that's not how it works. on top of that their attraction makes no sense because whatshisface is just there. he is just there. he's nothing and no one so the sentiments are even more empty and on top of that he doesnt listen to a single request fucking obviously because the basis of their relationship is fucking rape so fucking listening and respecting his partner is not on his list of fucking priorities. he's literally so fucking annoying even without being a rapist it's like someone please beat his ass.

and then after all of that you want us to feel bad? with your horrible writing, poorly misplaced music, stupid costumes (those fucking SHOES THEY ARE HIDEOUS, AND MOST OF THIER CLOTHES DO NOT FIT IT'S LIKE WHY), questionable fucking editing. we're supposed to wnat them together? this sounds literally fucking crazy but bear with me lmao even with the rape they could at least have SOMETHING i mean like i cant believe im fucking saaying this. but like in addicted heroin which is fuckin tragic and awful at least there's a MODICUM of interest but honestly that show s a fucknig drag. idk they lookd good together? here we have 0. nothing. and it doesnt motivate. watching obsessed again i can see why i liked it in the beginning bc they have good chemistry but the acting and production adn like everything about it plus the rape-y vibes it's just too much. you need to pick one thing so if you're going to be a shit writer at least supplement it with something. this thing is nothing.

and even more nonsensical and what boggles my mind frankly out of all this is the mother's involvement and the father's final response. there are NO consequences? theyre all happy?

ok so lets go through this:

1. 2 boys grow up 2gether, one of the boys is fucking psycho, the mother knows but does nothing??????????????

2. one of the sons moves out so his father doesn't get a hint that's he's fucking gay. ok fine. he has 2 best friends, a job, an apt. he is fine.

3. aforementioned brother is obsessed with him for SOME REASON besides being crazy?

3.5 no one has done anything during him growing up to help him not be crazy?

4. mom says to husband who is their father also just in case we forget "im afraid he will lose his humanity"

4.5 again, do nothing. 0. just like oh man hes crazy. guess that's just our son ;)

4. who cares. plies him with alcohol purposefully to rape him. not even dubious (even though dubious is fucked and not okay or is just not. fucking real. these shows are contextless when they want to be or even movies or whatever so it's like largely not up to the task to understand complexity in human rships and then oversimplifies it constantly because that's what we do IRL. but people have fucking feelings you know and we realize when things don't feel good or right to us either very quickly after or having to process it. and once you're eyes are opened you may feel as something was fucking ripped away from you. for the modc couple this would be a very logical conclusion for the high schooler the thirty year old dated but again logic or feelings are up to their whimsy. no one cares bc everything can be counted as dubious so honestly it's a fucking stupid fucking topic like again why are we litigating what is and isnt consent when you could just like idk. read cues? consent? wait? not be a freak? like we all know what is proper human shit so even if we are watching this uncritically which u cant bc it's glaring and stupid it's just even more dumb) so it was honestly a rape plot like he literally planned it soooooooooo??!?!

5. aftermath of rape the victim is like literally fucking bereft and confused. and a rape victim. like that's what they are insinuating and what also he is to be clear.

6. boy tells him "idc if i raped u i luv u lmao"

7. mom ENCOURAGED THE BOY to get him drunk because her other son was too nice? she encouraged her adult son to rape her adult step-son (but her real son because she repeatedly says you are my son and the dad does too THEY GREW UP TOGETHER WHEN THE KID WAS IN AN IMPRESSIONABLE STATE) so THIS ALSO MAKES EVEN LESS MOTHERFUCKING SENSE

8. everyone finds out about his rape and he isnt mortified he's just concerned about himself being gay to his dad?????? except it's not really about his gayness bc now it's about his sudden love for his rapist brother? which? hm ok. understandable the dad is like wow i do not think i like this

9. dad knows all of it is fucked up, everyone does, knows the mother fucked up, knows he fucked up. doesnt like it because he is normal. so we know this is terrible? ok great so—

10. father says "i can't accept this...but i'm willing to give you my blessing" ok see here's the thing. when you write you have to think about the things you are putting on the page and what you have written previously. this quite literally made no sense how the fuck are you going to not accept them but give them your blessing? does this crew know what the fuck words are? i'm assuming they went to some sort of school to obtain jobs here bc there cannot be natural talent or experience. maybe most of them are rich. fuck i do not know but this also makes no sense. just the literal logic of it it's like fucking insane the whiplash.

10.5 apparently this father is also shitty. everyone here sucks and they are basically begging me to think xing si is a fucking idiot so i dont even want to look at him if he is an object he doesnt matter so now i want to kick him. thanks a lot you made the victim get absolutely fucking nothing

they KEEP PUSHING the brother thing it is so insane and it's liek GUYS WE GET IT WE UNDERSTAND THEYRE "RELATED" BUT NOT RELATED SO IT'S OK HE WAS "RAPED" BUT NOT RAPED but you're GOING BACK ON YOUR OWN RULES!!!!!!!!!! WE GET THAT THEY ARE BROTHERS!!! WE'RE OVER IT NOW BUT WHAT IS THIS WHEN WE ALREADY ESTABLISHED SOMETHING? I AM CONFUSION? they flip flop between my son, my brother my actual brother, and cannot fucking distinguish between love for your father and love for your romantic partner? so to me what i see is that the father wants to fuck the son. that's the conclusion i am garnering now considering nothing matters and his love for his "brother" is the same as his love for his dad lmao. they couldnt even do that in a way that made sense. like damn anybody can get anything. these ppl who are doing this have to be fucking rich and/or have connections.

also this guy sounds literally like a textbook abuser like he says constantly "im the best choice" is a rapist is awful holds capital (oh hees "saving" smh ur trapping her!!!!! RETIRE!!!!) also wears terrible shoes so i am like ur alllllllllLLLLL FUCKING CRAZY ur all literally crazy and then they are trying to set rules and boundaries in their fucking house like WHY ARE THEY LIVING TOGETHER EVEN? even tho oh my god they know he raped him and for some reason they are both allowing to live in the house but they dont want them to have sex??!?!?!??!??!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?! i get that this is their house but this is like at this point these ppl are writing anything and now whatshisface is acting like a 2 yr old again and we are supposed to find this cute? like it makes 0 sense why do u fucking care u literally encouraged ur son to rape him so they cant have consensual sex under your nose now and have to wait four years? this is coming from the son who couldnt wait until someone was sober enough to realize hes fucking psychotic and should be killed also the fact that they act like being 20 means u have no fucking brain like this kid is in med school supposedly how do we know like hes a liar and an idiot so. also wait do they mean undergrad? how are you in med school at 20? is he a genius? girl i dont care lmao i guess i missed that but it's not like it matters so whatever

even if we ignore the stupidity of the literal acts, the grossness of the content, the absolute inability to write coherently or even remotely in a way where we would even want to see them together which is like....u set it up at the beginning so he punches "the love his life's best friend" also holy fuck im sorry remember when he punches muren because xing si got too drunk. so i'm guessing whatshisface is that good of a bartender that he makes super strong drinks and gets xing si drunk but his alcohol is magical therefore it doesn't make him sick. his alcohol is the type that gets you drunk but somehow doesnt get to your liver even though that's how we get drunk but dont ask guys he's only in med school and a bartender so i think he knows best (seriously have the main writers had a day of fun in their lives? have they ever been drunk? are they toddlers? drunk babies could probably do better tho.) i get that he was also jealous but if this kid is SOOOOOO genius (he understands social cues lmao he has the cpacity to project onto his victim so im like miss me with the not understanding shit. go to a fucking therapist like seriously did no one care abt this kid? his mother thinks he's like almost a goddamn murderer. how is she not dead? how are they all not dead? how do any of them know how to drive with this type of brain?) then he would understand that they are very clearly friends since he watched them part in a very platonic way and since he apparently knows what love is cos he thinks....he can....make someone fall in love with him bc he loves them? again, i wouldnt know hes 20 and taiwanese and im 29 and black from AMERICA so im WESTERN* so you know. different life experiences i guess XD

even if we do mental gymnastics to get it to a place where they "had sex" and he didnt rape him there's 0 ZERO ZERO ZERO ZERO ties to the literal story they wrote and the rules they set up. i'm going ot assume they dont know wtf theyre doing and i know for a fact we all care more about their dumb show than they do but it's actually startling how piss poor this is it's like idek what to compare it to. the continuity is awful awful awful they needed a script supervisor majorly and they are making bank and are going to make fucking bank fof this shit. and itll just continue like that until IRL material changes and that's facilitated by these very same groups they choose to profit off of and exploit by propelling it into the mainstream and litigating homosexuality through capitalism. and i'm being specific with homosexuality. i dont want a GL market like at all and i know why we wouldnt have it either and that has everything to do with the nature of BL, capitalism, coercion, and the fanbase being young girls and women. i don't think in this day and age we can safely say all the fans are straight; i'm sure a majority but many women or people on the gender spectrum and sexuality spectrum also consume it. frankly, it's possible the women who write it could be or something too. i dont rly believe any1 is str8 lmao but im just saying it's not out of the realm of possibility. but it isnt about that at all. that's why we wont see "good" female characters (like well written) often that's why we won't see trans women or kathoeys or fat people or black asians in it. a lot of it is is a choice we participate in whatever. but holy fuck dude u could at least respect the audience's fucking intelligence. i'm talking about everything i think that is encapsulated in the project but it's even more jarring and worse because it's so insanely inconsistent and poorly done. like how we jump from one conclusion to another is wild to me. even their first "night together" and he wakes up im like girl....u no ur ass felt it. this nigga broke into his house and was like "im gonna have u" like it's getting weird

just make xing si suffer offscreen not us the stupidity is staggering, mind blowing, hilarious.

how wong kar wai, a straight man from HK (or at least married to a woman), or barry jenkins, a striahgt black man, write/do stories well about people they wouldnt knw about their experiences directly is....well thinking like using their brains and like knowing all types of people? the man who co-wrote moonlight is a hOMOSEXUAL, leslie cheung was fucking gay or queer (and he committed suicide and that's important also RIP homie) both are hailed as queer cinema like WKW wanted to do something else and invested time into it, changed the way he played around with structure, moved away from his crime oriented stuff. he THOUGHT about it and this film is about their reality. it's a harsh film, idk how i feel about it (but my fav movies of his are the crime ones or the messy ones where it's clear he didnt write a script lmao fallen angels is one of my fav movies its' abt assassins kinda) but i know it means something. and he didnt like what HK had previously wasnt enough. it is not the only cinema that should be shown since it's such a stark reality and depressing but it is a real depiction so we can have all sorts of stuff. no this isnt WKW level or moonlight level but i know for a fact these people think they are doing something because artists always do i say this as one and someone who is equally as useless. you're making a statement.

i also hate the westerner component of peoples analyses. first of all dont do cultural relativism. we can critique and respect. but second of all how are we going to keep saying "dont put western ideals on this" when that is what is happening anyway because that's part and parcel for soft power and capitalism. how about taiwan's history with the KMT? what about the regimes young people fought about? aided by US imperialism which permeates through society and affects material conditions, views, democracy, identity and that goes into culture and media. hm? what about that? is that reality too fucking western for people? that we are doing the same thing again now? is that okay to talk about or is that only on your time?

then there's the argument that this is just entertainment. yea no shit but the thing is if we r gonna talk about marginalized groups and watch bc of marginalized groups and then be expected to identify then i dont see why i cant put this in context. even if it wasnt fucking serious we'd still judge it. but it's so pompous and again like i wouldnt say EYE think it's art but it is "art" in the literal sense and no self respecting artist would ever go "man this means nothing." of course im not sure if they do respect themselves so hey but u cant just go oh man it's entertainment when it literally rests on the fact that HOMOS are MARGINALIZED. it literally rests on the fact that WOMEN ARE OBJECTS. you either want progress or you dont. i dont understand being so demanding but not beign specific in the demands and not trying to use your brain. if you dont want to use your brain don't. but if you are looking , engaging, and keep making these arguments or telling ppl it doesnt matter whilst complaining about how much others care is hypocritical at best, willfully obtuse at worst. both bad. :)

(also all this + another thing; it is insulting to have this like wedding happen based off of this stupid relationship when people fought so hard and had to push it. now they can use the material conditions to their advantage but it's so ridiculous. also because there is difficulty still in getting married in taiwan i'm honestly like....the boldness of the writers...)

[maknaesdancersrappers]

july 21

hello. july 21 is a special day for me and you dont have to read this because its just me venting out my thoughts and emotions as long as i can without word/character limits on any platform.

july 21 is my maternal grandmother’s birthday. when i was born, my mom went abroad often and my dad had the regular 9 to 5 job plus extra hours for commute. so growing up with my sisters who are 5 and 7 years older, our grandparents and aunts took care of us.

im also more fond of my maternal grandmother since my paternal grandmother lived far away and we rarely ever get to see her (usually only during summers and once she stayed with us for awhile) until she passed away from Alzheimer's.

during the long hiatus i took early this year (late december to mid-march?), a lot has happened in my life. my health was put at risk because of the ash fall brought by the volcano eruption (january 12); i had allergies for weeks - i couldnt breathe properly, let alone sleep because of it. it was about to be the second year after graduating college and i have yet to get a job; the pressure from my family - and myself - was so unbearable that i caught myself slipping back to my very, very, very dark thoughts. and the worst thing that happened in those three months: my grandmother passed away. in filipino, grandmother is lola (loh-lah) and i’d like to use that for the rest of this post.

if you ask anyone in their neighborhood, any of our family friends, and relatives, everyone will tell you that her death was sudden. because everyone knows her as the sometimes-funny-sometimes-cranky old lady that owns the convenience store at the corner of the street. she was 96. she was 96 but she refused to get a wheelchair or use a walking stick even though her knees started to hurt after a few steps. she was 96 but didn’t need glasses to read most of the time. she was 96 but didn’t have any maintenance medication. ever since she reached her 90′s, she had gone to the town clinic at least twice because she fell over (from loss of balance) and busted her head. yet she would walk the next day like she doesnt have stitches on her scalp. she hated going to the doctor, she’d always claim that nothing hurts and the only thing she wanted the doctor to fix was her hearing (its as weak as how her eyesight is clear)

i wasnt the only one in the family that got severely affected by the ash fall. my lola also had trouble breathing because of it. she also went to the doctor for it and they only prescribed her antibiotics. please remember this info. this should be around early february

she got a little better but her voice was very hoarse from the phlegm. even before this, lola had little to no appetite and would only eat when someone else is eating (usually if it’s us, her granddaughters). and by little to no appetite, i mean her whole meal would be three spoonfuls of rice and one piece/chunk of whatever the main dish/ulam is. whenever we ask if she had eaten (even though we know she hadnt) she’d always claim that she already has (this eventually became a little joke in our family.) we took this sign as her dementia getting worse (although she was never really diagnosed with it, we had naturally assumed it because she would always repeatedly tell us stories that she insists happened even though some have been debunked and there were times she forgets our names if we havent visited in a while.)

after she gets better from the cough (idk the real diagnosis of it), her legs started to swell and because her routine had been reduced to being bedridden for most of the day, my aunts thought it was just poor circulation. it took two weeks before they brought her back to the town clinic and again, they just prescribed her with some medicine. everything after this is blurry to me until feb 21

my mom, being the eldest, made the decision to bring lola to the hospital. she’s, rightfully, unsatisfied with the town doctor’s diagnosis and prescriptions because lola is in so much pain and her legs were still swollen and its been weeks. i was with her in the emergency room while my mom and aunt did the paper work and the staff ran tests on lola. i’m contacting my sister who was in singapore and we’d video call to entertain lola since she was very adamant - and vocal - that she did not want to be admitted to the hospital bc she was “fine.” goSh she made so many hospital staff laugh because she would always announce whenever she had to fart. after like 2 hours, we move her into a ward and my mom tells me that i’ll have to stay overnight to watch over her. i was very apprehensive of this idea. i honestly did not want to. seeing her in pain was bad enough, but the fact we were in a room with other people and she was crying out loud made me really anxious but it was final. my mom, aunt, and uncle all went back home just to have dinner and they’ll come back since lola’s doctor would be coming by to give the results and for that hour they were gone? i lost it.

lola started talking/praying out loud, asking god why she was in so much pain, asking what she had done to deserve this; and i didn’t know what to do but hold her hand and kiss her head. i couldn’t even show her i was crying. when my mom got back, i told her i cant do it and she eventually convinced my other sister to join me, who cancelled her plans for the next day. that night, i did not and could not fall asleep. after a few hours, her doctor finally came by and dropped a bomb on us. he was kind enough to talk to my mom and aunt behind the curtains in the softest voice ever while i helped the nurse with lola, but i could hear him crystal clear.

cancer of the liver. 

they even momentarily walked back to lola to touch her stomach and stepped back out. i almost thought i misheard, but my mom and aunt’s expressions were too grim that it basically confirmed it. later on, my mom finally told me and explained that the antibiotics she had been taking weeks ago were too strong for her because of her lifestyle and diet. there were tumors in her liver and surgery wouldn’t do anything. i dont remember what i did aside from sketching on the journal i brought, but until i got home at 10am the next day, i did not sleep a wink.

feb 22. when i woke up at 2PM, i was told that they had lola discharged from the hospital. there was nothing we could do but try to ease the pain to the best of our abilities and wait. starting that day, i went over to lola’s house to help out with feeding her, giving her medicine, and just trying to keep her happy by randomly smiling at her when i see her looking around or dancing to no music.

feb 24. these were the early weeks of covid - ph hadn’t had a case yet, i believe, but travel restrictions were being implemented. my sister in singapore was doing everything to make sure she could come home because we don’t know when, but we know lola was leaving soon. of all the things our mom told her not to do, she cried at the entrance of the embassy and by the grace of god, someone took pity and listened to her (bc she was denied entry since she had a small cough) and she was able book a flight at midnight and be home in 4 hours. that afternoon, when i arrived at lola’s house, that was the very first time i stood at the doorway to greet her like i usually did and she didn’t smile. not even the corners of her lips moved. she was in that much pain that she couldn’t even greet me back like she always did, which was to smile and nod her head. that night, we all decided to sleepover there (with the exception of my dad since he had to feed our dogs at home). i take my usual seat in the living room and i notice a white dress that i remember (from photos) being lola’s 50th anniversary wedding gown and without being told, i know it was what she was going to wear for the very last time.

feb 25. being notoriously a late sleeper, i was about to go to sleep at 2AM when i hear lola groaning and whining out loud. when i checked her, her stubborn lil ass was trying to get out of bed alone!!! so i obviously panic and try to wake up anyone by exclaiming that lola had to go to the bathroom - she’s been wearing adult diapers for weeks now but refuses to go in them and is adamant about bringing her to the bathroom so she could relieve herself - so me, and the same aunt and uncle from the hospital, assisted her into this modified chair so she could pee and the only thing i could do was hold her hand, like always. after that, my uncle said he’d watch over her and lie down beside her on the bed so in case she needs to go again, he can take care of it himself. after falling asleep, i heard a few hours later that my sister from SG arrived. when i woke up later on, my sisters and i presented ourselves to lola bc its been so long since she last saw us complete, and this time she was able to give us a small nod of acknowledgement. i realized that none of my uncles and aunts went to work that day, thinking it was just so we could be complete since my sister was home. but then i overhear them making plans to have a priest come over for the sacrament of anointing of the sick - which based on my last and only experience (my grandfather/lolo), this must be the day. during the session, a few of my aunts and an uncle cried. my sisters cried, too, but i forced myself not to. when the priest left, i don’t know how long, but suddenly, she was gone. i didn’t know how to react. this was the second time i’ve seen someone pass away before my very eyes. everyone was crying out for forgiveness, kissing lola’s head, but i couldn’t move one bit. i was finally crying, but i couldn’t move at all.

3 days. from learning about the real problem with lola, it only took 3 days for it to take her away from us. not even a week, or a month. the only bright side to this was that she’s finally relieved of all the pain that’s been causing her suffering. 3 days of knowing her time was very, very short, but it was still a shock when she finally left. 

for the longest time, lola’s goal was to reach the age of 100 because apparently our government will reward her with 100,000 pesos (like 2k usd) for doing so. she wanted to reach 100 because she wanted to leave us with some inheritance haha. and everyone believed she could do it. no one doubted her. until this happened. maybe its just me, but i feel foolish... completely stupid and ignorant for knowing deep down in my heart that she would reach 100 that losing her 3 years prior her goal hurt me more than ever. 

it’s been 5 months but remembering her death still makes me cry. i have dreams (and you all know im a lucid dreamer) where she’s still alive and we’re talking about how she beat cancer at 96 in just a few months, but then i’ll remember that she didn’t and the dream in front of me just shatters and i’ll wake up empty and crying. i have never felt so much regret after she passed bc all she wanted was to see me graduate and it was up to me to show her that i got my first job and give her a portion of my first salary, but i couldn’t even do that. i waited too long and now its too late. her ideal type for me was a rich atenean boy who could drive 😂 and i still couldn’t give her that bc im so anti-men. there was a time i was so scared to go back to lola’s house bc she called me out during dinner - “baket ka malungkot/why are you sad?” - when all i was doing was browsing through my phone, scarily enough going through another “episode”, and the last person i’d ever want to know about my possible depression was her. of all my suicidal episodes, i’ve always resolved them by thinking of her - that i will continue living because i wanted to see her smile. because i wanted to see her happy.

i miss her so much. i wish i had been a better granddaughter to her. the small things i’ve done for her were never enough. in the past 5 months, i’ve only dreamt about her twice (actually being with her) and both times made the day so hard to function. i havent moved on and i dont know if im the only one. i dont know if i’ll ever move on. she would have been 97 today. whenever she forgets my name, i’ll tell her i have the same birthday as her and she’ll remember me. she’ll say “ahhh rosean! july 10!”

if someone read through this, im sorry you had to go through that mess. but thank you for hearing me out. no, i’ll thank you the way my lola would thank people, verbatim:

thank you very much from the bottom of my heart.

[dumbdancemomssideblog]

S1E1: The Competition Begins

okie dokie first ever episode of dance moms rewatch starts now :0 i actually remember watching this the very first time it aired on lifetime because i was channel surfing and saw a commercial for it earlier that day. that was the summer between 8th and 9th grade. ah memories... i didnt know what to expect because i did dance when i was a kid but not on a competition team and it was mostly ballet so i was pretty unfamiliar with this whole world. 

anyway lets begin. this is probably gonna be a longer post than what i’ll end up writing for the other episodes in season 1 bc the first episode introduces so much info, just a heads up

Act 1: (aside: yes its insufferable to divide this into “acts” when its really just like “segments separated by commercial breaks” but thats how they’re called in actual tv scripts so im just going with that cuz i cant think of a better/easier way uwu)

god this is so fucking early 2010s lmao

i miss these days where they were just talented nobodies from pittsburgh on a low budget reality tv show that nobody even knew would be successful. and the bad hair and makeup but idk if that was also just a 2011 thing lol

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES GREEN SCREEN INTROS IM DYING

the chalkboard !!!! they werent doing the pyramid on the mirror yet 

(apparently abby never did anything similar to the pyramid thing but the producers made her and it became a whole Thing on the show and thats why the moms were like wtf is this bullshit the first week)

mackenzie looks like a toddler. chloe is so tiny. theyre the 2 who changed the most physically over the course of the show

i remember watching this for the first time being used to ballet lyrical and jazz but never having done or really seen acro/gymnastics in dance choreo and being SO flabbergasted. i was thinking “a chin stand is not dancing what the actual hell” and yknow what? i was right

melissa: “my boyfriend knows how much i spend on dance because he signs the checks...............hermehhemrherrmehermh” (the most awkward laugh omg)

maddie is wearing a fucking bumpit in her hair i cannot

melissa deadass just said out loud “im here for my daughter im not here to make friends” ok everybody mark that one off on your catty women’s reality tv show bingo card!

camera man accidentally getting in the shot filming right in front of the huge wall-mirror.... what is this, amateur hour? i’ll let it slide since its the first day of filming rehearsal but step it up, boys

aw i forgot about maddie getting sick and crying :/ poor kid

melissa saying “i cant stand a chid that’s sick” sounds so edited like the intonation made it seem to me like they just cut her off mid-sentence i love lifetime

oh this was still when they were wearing normal stuff to class/rehearsal like black leotards bc they werent getting sent a trillion crazy 2-piece dancewear outfits for free yet bc they werent famous, man those were the days

Act 2:

[obligatory b-roll footage of downtown pittsburgh] 

the maddie chloe paige trio !!!! this is making me feel so nostalgic

“knees together, paige. you’re bow-legged, you need to fix that”

“you’re tall, you’re skinny, you’re a beautiful girl, you can do better than this. FOCUS” shes like 10 abby what the hell

“people think im tough and i guess i am but i would rather be the one to make your kid cry in the privacy of my studio than at an open-call audition in front of hundreds of people”

okay unpopular opinion alert: i agree with a lot of what abby says about stuff like this but her delivery is flawed, to but it euphemistically, that being said i think the production team of the show and the fame inflating her ego changed all of this somewhere over the course of the second season and its really sad to see :/ i can expand on that thought later tho

aw paige crying bc abby correcting her (but not saying anything personal or out of line, just technique corrections (at based on what we were shown, we dont know everything she said oop)) shes a sensitive kid she never should have been put on this show :( 

paige looks exactly like her mom i didnt realize that before

nia and holly were done so dirty throughout the whole series in terms of the narrative the producers set up about nia being the weakest link :/ 

Act 3:

cathy’s entire involvement in the show from the very beginning was so painfully obviously scripted (or at least heavily staged) 

vivi was also done dirty by the show’s narrative and she was only 6 and they presented her as like the butt of the joke bc her mom’s “character” was crazy and also she wasnt good at dance. i wonder how she feels about the show now that shes a teenager hmm. she really seemed not to give a fuck about dance for better or for worse when she was a kid tho so maybe she doesnt care ?

in what universe would an owner of another competitive dance studio bring her own kid to another studio more than an hour’s drive away, AND be under the impression that she could compete with them in a week, especially when they showed the kids’ and moms’ shocked reaction at the start of the episode to having to learn a dance in a week and compete it? like really what is the point of cathy and vivi being a part of this show im so ????

Act 4: 

THE MINISTER DAWN OUTBURST HOW DID I FORGET ABOUT THIS

this fight is about 50% of what got them a full season 1 and then things took off from there tbh. the other 50% was the electricity dance but thats a point for next episode..... :)

“you’re a minister act like one” “YOU’RE RIGHT I AM A MINISTER! LET’S PLAY THE BIBLE GAME ABBY, WHEN JESUS SAW THINGS THAT WERE WRONG HE WENT AFTER THEM, AND YOU’RE NOT GOING TO DO THIS TO MY KID” ma’am i think the wrongs jesus addressed were of slightly more importance than a preteen being told she cant take a dance class if shes violating the studio’s dress code

this is so good bc it wasnt staged afaik and there are regular students all throughout the building just STARING at them like lmao what even is going on, so im pretty sure this is real???

regardless, yeah dont wear socks and a tshirt to an acrobatics class, thats common fucking sense

another cameraman-in-mirror sighting, but its hard to think about angles when filming spontaneous drama like this, so i wont count it against them

“you called me fat” (i remember that being in the episode but thats not on the episode available through lifetime on demand that im watching from my moms tv hmmmmmm) “i told you to close and tuck in your two-piece costume, theres a big difference. HOW CAN YOU REMEMBER THAT BUT YOU CAN’T REMEMBER TO TURN YOUR FEET OUT” uh scream

she really called the police on this woman i cannot handle this. can you imagine being a police officer responding to this call? 

“we have a parent thats out of control. pardon? no shes doesnt have weapons, just her mouth” iconic

im sorry im still not over the hair and makeup. the flat hair with the side bangs. the black pencil eyeliner applied all the way around the eye. why did any of us think this was a look :( why did we do this :(

Act 5:

they went all the way to phoenix to compete 3 numbers, only 2 of which are shown in the episode.

i think this is the only time they ever went to west coast dance explosion because its an actual competition and they wouldnt allow filming after this lol i think they did go to wcde one weekend in addition to a competition where they were filming but it wasnt shown or mentioned at all

abby not wanting brooke and paige to have a french manicure on stage if theyre the only ones in the group with the french tips is perfectly valid idk why it was framed as some crazy micromanaging shit

i also am really not a fan of the whole “high functioning alcoholic wine mom/crazy stage mom” schtick they were pushing for the first few episodes of this show

in retrospect i feel like so many of the quips in this episode were intentionally fucking crazy just to get the audience engaged enough to want to watch more episodes...

“see those girls down there, those girls with the legs? thats who you’re up against, so step it up”

abby warning them that its dangerous for their little party hats to slip when they’re doing aerials and pirouettes and stuff: “what if you were at radio city music hall and they had the ice rink out and you were doing a side aerial and fell 13 stories down and died, huh?” fantastic point abby thank you for saying that to 5 girls ages 8-12 less than 5 minutes before they went on stage. perfect time for a teaching moment like that :)

i forgot how bad the camera work was in the first few episodes for footage of their performances. like they really didnt think the show’s audience would actually want to watch the kids dance, the producers and editors thought we just wanted to see stage mothers yelling at each other lol

also the mic feed over the music of abby talking to herself giving them corrections while watching them dance on stage.... im so glad they quit doing that. i dont remember them doing it like that for any other episode, i hope im right

this choreo is very basic and its a cute dance i guess but its very cringe in some places and for the first episode this is such a forgettable group routine

their scandalized reaction to placing third and the sad piano music is so funny honestly

and maddies reaction in the interview which was almost definitely fed to her by the producers where shes like “i win all the time i dont really know what its like to LOSE i always win or get runner up” so many of maddies lines from season 1 interviews sound so fake and she was probably too naive to know they were getting her to say that stuff so they could paint her as a conceited brat (she was EIGHT)

the trio costume was so ugly im sorry (is it supposed to be like a 50s pinup bathing suit?) (and the headband thing looks so bad) and also the music is bad but they had no real authority over that bc of copyright stuff

chloe’s headpiece coming forward and the ensuing drama was another moment in the episode that really solidified public interest in the show imho.... 

“YOU’RE IN THE BAR HAVING A DRINK AND YOUR KID’S HEADPIECE IS FALLING OFF” “it did not FALL OFF it CAME FORWARD it was FINE!!!”

“mistakes happen, we’re human.” “YOU are. mistakes like that dont happen to me”

and then the “next time on dance moms” with the WILDLY INAPPROPRIATE electricity dance, of course. genuinely that was really smart of the producers in terms of structuring things to generate intrigue lol. and obviously it ended up working....

[anyhao-archived]

okay since i didnt do a fan account for last time i saw vav, i decided i absolutely needed to do it this time especially since jacob was there this time. ill put this under a read more since i ended up talking a lot lol. but a few highlights from last year though real quick:

my mom went with me and she fell in love with st.van who seemed very impressed that a mother liked him so much jdkflgh

ace gets more attractive every time and. red is his color no one else can wear red except him

baron was exceptional at fan service as always

they changed their choreo for it to work for 6 people and i was very sad. but very impressed that they learned it all again

im sure theres more but thats all i can remember specifically off the top of my head. and it was over a year ago oops smh i shouldve wrote it down. anyways this year snapshots were rly expensive so i only got one with jacob and it was so so so worth it. the absolute love of my life apple of my eye my entire WORLD

i personally enjoyed this year much better than last year for a few reasons: it was the same venue who now knew what to do lol and not scrambling like last year. also the sound quality was... off. last year. could hardly hear vocals but this year it was BEAUTIFUL. also!!!! JACOB was there! that on its own makes it worth it for me! also my friend was there with me this year too hehe

also heres my fan account from 2 years ago (the first time i saw vav, with jacob) in case anyone wants to read that one too

ANYWAYS: the fansign. was much more rushed than previous years but that makes sense with the sheer volume of people there. i dont remember what i said to at least half the members lmao but i did tell jacob that i was happy he was here this time and that i missed him. also i literally went mute when i saw ace hahaha

i told lou and st.van thanks for coming (i think?) and originally i was gonna tell lou yeehaw cuz he was wearing a cowboy tie thing but i forgot. 

also ziu kept saying my name over and over except he kept pronouncing it wrong dsjhkgfl that letter ㄹ can be pronounced both as an R and an L. so my name is maiRin but he kept saying maiLin. props to him for trying again and again though lol. ziu’s handshake was so so hard too lol like he wouldnt let go so i told him he had a great handshake and he was like :))) YOU TOO!!. hes so loud and energetic lol

during the hi touch i kept thinking about how tall they are!!! like they mustve grown since last year lmao or maybe i shrunk?? anyways me and my friend made a heart together for the group photo

the concert was FUCKING AMAZING!! like i said they fixed the sound problem from last time so they sounded sooo good. they did all my fave songs except for abc but apparently ayno choreographed runway specifically for the tour bc so many of us wanted it lol

god. ace unbuttoned his shirt during poison and i think my soul left my body. and baron did that tummy tease by lifting up his sweater..... how can they do such a thing to me... im losing my voice and i can pinpoint the exact song why: dance with me. and spotlight. i screamed all those lyrics believe me!! 

ALSO THE STAGE PART?? where they called fans up on the stage? i got SO embarrassed secondhand. the 30 second eye contact made me so nervous that poor girllooked like she was abt to pass out. and then ayno kept coming closer and baron worked together w/ him and made sure she couldnt walk backwards and THEN? WHAT THE FUCK DOES AYNO DO he uses baron as a wall and does the FUCKING WALL SLAM!!!!!!!!! i dont think we screamed louder than at that moment. i couldnt watch some of the fan service it was just. so much.

and at the end!! baron did a huge dance break for poison’s encore stage and he was so close to me. he looked so fluffy and soft but also s*xy in that turtleneck sweater... 

during ending ments. people started chanting for jacob bc he wasnt there last time and i (cry emoji) as well as chanting ‘best leader’ for st.van. god i love vampz so much. st.van also took a pride flag and wore it too it was nice

and now: the snapshot session. unfortunately i only could afford one and i got mine with jacob. so some background knowledge: in their first concert i also took a pic with jacob where we did the E.T. pose where the tip of our fingers touch and. it was DESTINY OK the flash reflected off the glass behind us and lit up the exact spot where our fingers met and.. i cried when i saw it LMAO. 

SO! i brought that snapshot with me this time to show him!!! and i was able to thanks to some sneaky moves using my sweater and he was like :O but i dont think he focused on the E.T part he was more like: omg u took a pic with me before?? (like he was surprised he has fans? bitch i LOVE you you have so many fans what a humble boy but also. he needs to know hes got fans!!!!) and i was like yes!!! i saw you before!! :^) very happy abt it! and then we took the pic.

and our pose was him wrapping his arm around me. it was so sweet he held up his arm so i could come snuggle up near him and i wanted to literally DIE. and our pic together is so cute ill add it at the end!!!! and this time i did not run away lmao (spoiler 1st time i took a pic with him i ran away and the staff had to tell me to come back so he could say bye) dhfsjgk 

AND i said bye to him without stuttering!!! he smiled so brightly at me ;; and then he said: ill see u again. cant wait to meet you again. and my heart fuckin BURST. he wants to see me again!!!!!! bitch i wanna see u again for the rest of my LIFE!!!!!!!!

anyways im in my jacob feels in particular today now but also all the members were beautiful and talented and wonderful and it was just such a great night. i love them so so so much i would do anything for them

ok so ignore how i look but this is our snapshot: its a polaroid and we look so cute and happy together i wanna cry. i miss him already. apologizes for the blurriness and random lights its hard to take a pic of a polaroid lol

[yievie]

whew! what’s up everyone! my name is crissy and yes, i am the clown who sent my account ask on anonymous last night. luv that for me! I GOT A COOL FAMILY ICON IM CRYING!!! now this is yi eun hye, better known as evelyn yi or evie, paging dr. sexy md don’t call her that though, she’ll kill you omg the second eldest princess of the four neglected korean princess sisters aka the mom friend sister or the buzzkill responsible sister. 

~`click anywhere here for a link to my app ~

under the cut i’m gonna throw some important personality and background stuff along with maybe? half-formed plot ideas? if not i’ll make a follow up post later, but pls like this plot if you wish to plot, i’ll try to come bother u. my ims are open hmu anytime (also bc im anxious af to b first message bc im BABY) and I ALSO have a discord located at quarantine queen#2918 where i’m usually v v v active. (lmk if u cant add me shoot me a message on here and ill fix it) ok imma shut up here is cranky daughter! ITS LONG SRRY

( pS: also if my blog is too hard to read just stick /mobile on the end of the url xx )

background 

the empress and emperor of korea had 5 kids, 4 daughters, 1 pampered son and evie was the second oldest daughter after dianna but like, she’s bossy and high strung and acts like the oldest anywayS so it doesn’t matter!

woo! however, korean tradition is rooted deeply in patriarchy and other backwards thinking,  >:(((( so evie’s parents basically pretended like their son was the only kid they had and sent evie and her 3 sisters off to swedish boarding school to ROT as they each turned 10 and forgot abt them while they groomed their son for the throne! thx mom n dad! luv u too! sdjlaksjd

during her time at boarding school evie was expected to not learn much of anything, not do anything spectacular, she wasn’t expected very good grades or to be smart or successful or anything bc that was Men’s Work and so evie did . . . THE EXACT OPPOSITE.

evie EXCELLED in school, straight a’s, top of her class, honors, ap valedictorian, which meant all nighters, nose bleeds at 2am from studying too hard, looking dead walking through the hallways, eating ramen 25/8, falling asleep w her face in her textbooks, getting bullied a lot for being a nerd and Not looking like her sisters and like...the creature from the black lagoon.

her parents, understandably, were not very happy with this but it wasn’t until she wanted to go to medical school that her parents were like FURIOUS. to them, women, esp the princesses, were only supposed to get married, have kids, THAT WAS IT. so evie wanting to be a doctor enraged them. STAY MAD!

they tried to have her engaged SO. MANY. TIMES. but she has a really repellent personality, she’s very kat stratford from 10 things i hate about you. and is rude and states her very liberal very socialist opinions often, dresses sloppy and hurts mens feelings a lot just for fun so they all went rUNNING from those match appointments! her parents literally are losing their minds they don’t know what to do w her theyre like god why did we give birth to the aNTICHRIST!?!?!?

not wanting anything to do with her parents, evie got into college and medical student on scholarship based on her own merit and skill. evie went to the seoul national university for 4 years then did a 2 year residency at the country’s top hospital, becoming one of the best on call heart surgeons there.

the korean media likes to clown on her A LOT! bc shes scary and angry and cares very little abt her appreance is A DOCTOR and not a princess really for the opposite reason they clown on dianna but evie does not really care she doesn’t care abt impressing people, just saving lives and proving people wrong. finger guns

but yes! thats what u missed on glee. evie was a heart surgeon in korea before being shipped off to thailand! shes v salty by the way ... even more than usual.

fun facts?

evie wears massive grandma glasses to see bc shes BLIND when shes in line with her sister people do not think she’s related and are like “OMG OMG THE PRINCESSES!!! BUY WHATEVER U WANT ON THE HOUSE I--oh? maam? uh? can we help u, ahjumma?” HELP

very dry, mean, will call you out on ur shit and hurt ur feelings probably. doesn’t really know how to Chill or have fun, stays out of drama and parties for the most part literally that old man that tells u to get off their lawn

LOVES HER SISTERS!!!! LOVES THEM!!! moms them and nags the FUCK out of them tho abt everything. wear a sweater its cold, drink water, dONT DO THAT GET DOWN FROM THERE, i told u to eat before u drank all that soju pabo!!!! skhaslkfh BUT SHE LOVES THEM VERY MUCH HER WOOOORLD the only people shes kind of nice to

as stated, has tried to been matched up before but has basically scared away all her matches by being A Lot and not polite or dainty and burping probably

her mom calls her all the time to talk abt how shes having a heart attack bc her second daughter is an unmarried, childless, spinster with a cat who is embarrassing her by being a doctor and being loud and obnoxious and outspoken against the royal heirarchy and right wing politics. evie just puts her on mute and lets her keeping yelling at no one for the next hour

loves beer, loves fried chicken, very unladylike, wears oversized sweaters and her hair messy and watches love island australia and the bachelor just to make fun of the people being in love and stupid i think secretly she kind of wants it but...thinks shes unlovable and will die before she says that shh

bisexual legend! cue mr and mrs yi screaming somewhere

not that it matters bc she cares little abt romance and sex and always put work and school before everything so everything touchy like that she either ends abruptly or stays the hell away from

never parties or goes out but when she does get really drunk gets very cute and touchy and happy there is one video on the internet of her like on a table ashdkh yikes 

is soft deep down just like *shrek voice* donkey, orges are like onions they have layers and u gotta get past a lot of them for her to get past her level 4 tragic backstory and into the soft, vulnerable part of her personality its nice i promise she is SQUISHY

weird plots???

best friend? im sure she has one somewhere. or friends at all? people who arent scared of her who shes nice to....mostly

enemies woo! hate her its very easy to hate her so do it

u want to do a daredevil thing like when matt shows up bleeding and dying or after a fight or something and she patches u up

just anyone need a doctor bc paging dr sexy md~

past loves? boyfriend? girlfriend? weird flings? weird tension unresolved stuff WOOO

ANYONE who broke her heart for the angst and drama

hit on her itll b funny

anyone who she was previously matched w who she scared off

someone shes currently trying to be matched or betrothed to GOOD LUCK

someone she has a crush on YIKES or vice versa

any of the college kids need a tutor? 

roommates? 

ANYTHING PLS HMU <333

[honeybunchcalum]

50 questions you've never been asked before

Ok so no one tagged me in this, but I saw @wastethen8 answer these, and they’re pretty cool questions!

1. what is the colour of your hair brush? I actually don’t have a hairbrush bc I never brush my hair (it’s curly so that wouldn’t work out too well)

2. name of a food you never eat? mayonnaise 

3. are you typically too warm or too cold? always too hot 

4. what were you doing 45 minutes ago? watching ‘Dave’ on Hulu bc I love that show

5. what's your favourite candy bar? plain Hershey’s

6. have you ever been to a professional sports event? yep! 

7. what is the last thing you said out loud? oh my god bc my cat dropped something

8. what is your favorite ice cream? turkey hill mint choco chip (any other brand is pitiful compared to this one)

9. what is the last thing you had to drink? water

10. do you like your wallet? yeah! it looks like a wallet my mom had from the 90s, which is cool 

11. what was the last thing you ate? mint chocolate chip ice cream haha

12. did you buy any new clothes last week? nope

13. last sporting event you watched? a few minutes of the draft bc a few players from my college were drafted!

14. what's your favourite flavour of popcorn? butter

15. who was the last person you sent a message to? a friend talking about linkedin haha

16. ever go camping? YES and I fucking hated it. I went cabin camping with Girl Scouts and we got lost at night in the woods trying to get there, the cabin was gross, and I burned 8 of my fingers on a makeshift Bunsen burner :/

17. do you take vitamins? yes

18. do you go to church every sunday? no, but I try to pray anyway 

19. do you have a tan? no I literally never tan 

20. do you prefer chinese food or pizza? pizza for sure

21. do you drink soda with a straw? I don’t actually drink soda

22. what colour socks do you wear? black or gray, but I have some fun ones

23. do you ever drive above the speed limit? I dont really drive, but during my test I didnt and the first time I failed bc I took too long to turn and check for cars

24. what terrifies you? a lot, but mostly sickness (especially vomiting) bc I cant control it 

25. look to your left, what do you see? my headphones

26. what chore do you hate? putting away laundry

27. what do you think of when you hear an australian accent? 5sos ofc, mainly Luke bc I hear his accent the most 

28. what's your favourite soda? sprite I guess bc ive actually never had any other kind 

29. do you go into fast food places or drive thru? typically go in 

30. who was the last person you talked to? my mom

31. favourite cut of beef? skirt steak is my fav...so that?

32. last song you listened to? Monsters- All Time Low & blackbear

33. last book you read? A Thousand Splendid Suns- Khaled Hosseini for class and I actually liked it a lot

34. can you say the alphabet backwards? Im not gonna try, but I hope I can 😂

35. how do you like your coffee? depends..if I make it at home, just black, but at a coffee shop I love cold brew with flavor or a latte

36. favourite pair of shoes? my black booties that look like the ones Shawn and Luke wear 

37. the time you normally go to bed? 2? 3? 4?

38. the time you normally wake up? for class, minutes before 9 when my class starts 

39. what do you prefer, sunrise or sunset? sunset

40. how many blankets are on your bed? 2 

41. describe your kitchen plates? weird question... but they’re white with a teal trim on the edges and a rose

42. do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? not yet, but definitely not beer 

43. do you play cards? no 

44. what colour is your car? I dont have one of my own :(

45. can you change a tire? possibly I’d be able to figure it out if I had to 

46. your favourite province? like of New York city? state as in U.S. state? I’ve only been to Manhattan so I’ll go with that 

47. favourite job you've had? the one I have on campus :(

48. how did you get your biggest scar? It’s not really a scar but it’s under my chin bc ive gotten stitches there twice. The second time was when I was camping with Girl Scouts (again) and I was on a seesaw with my friend. My side didnt have handles, so when my friend went down I shot up fell forward on my chin. I was known around the camp for being the reason the seesaw was shut down 😂, also another reason I hate camping

49. favourite day of the week? Thursday or Friday 

50. what did you do today that made someone happy? I was sitting outside and texted my mom that I saw a bunny

Tagging whoever sees this and wants to do it! I hope you enjoyed my rambling and random answers

[foryouthegays]

Alright friends. Rant time

Ya know next time god makes me they might as well NOT put miso in me bc im going to Kill them

Anyway

So

I was writing (hey guess what yall i write sometimes bet ya didnt know that bc i dont like changing my content even tho its fun but im not good at it lol) nd my dad was in the other room nd he had my headphones bc im not allowed them when in another room bc,,,,porn??? Online friends???? ?? ?? ?Idk they think thats something i like when in reality im just watching tik tok and tss. And tss tik toks. Heh alliteration is fun. Anyway im in there and my dads been sick recently so hes clearing his throat every two seconds and its like so fkin loud like not actually loud but loud like how one thought can get louder and louder until its the only thing you hear so he comes in nd is like sHoW mE wHaT yOuRe dOinG so i give him my doc which is fine but hes like doing That Thing with his words where its like *t* blah blah. *t* blah blah. Then he clears his throat and god i almost cry right then like no stop also do yall get what i get by *t*? Like the ticking noise people make when they start talking its horrible. a speaker came to school and told this emotional story but i couldnt hear bc she did the *t* nd also the clicky lip smack thing and left like four minutes in because i was clenching my hands so hard my friend had to stop me before i cut off my circulation anyway he did that and told me to sleep bc im sick which im not i just have an ongoing fever whatever ya know its not like its been more then like four days or anything anyway he goes to his room nd is doin the throat thing nd then hes whistling and i go outside nd guess what fkin happens. Guess. I dare you. Yup! If you guessed a car alarm goes off on the other side of the valley, youd be right! Super quiet, but guess what, thats what i hear best!

Also sidenote, is there like, visual miso?? Like obv when i see people eating n stuff it starts my misoness but for things that dont have sound to begin with like my headphones do a blinky blinky when theyre on nd i have a Frick ton of tape over them bc i feel like its tappy tappy even tho i know its just blinky blinky

Also u know those people who like see One vid on miso thats like DoEs tHiS ComMoNlY anNoYiNg sOuNd LiKe LoUd cHewInG oR nAiLs oN a ChaLkboaRd AnNoy YoU? YOu hAvE mIsOphOniA, a NeW aNd StrAngE DisoRdeR! I kNoW tHiS bEcaUse I lOoKeD iT uP oN wIkiPedIa fOr twO seConDs and is like hm yea i do find this to be annoying so they tell u like ! I have miso too and ur like ayyy i hate life pal! Nd u have like the same class nd theres a presentation nd the person is doing the *t* or the clickly lip smack thing or theres a person clicky clicky pen boi nd u give them The Miso Look nd theyre like not even noticing it like yea i get that people have different triggers but i asked this person like what they do to manage it and theyre like oh i usually just ignore it, i can focus on other things, its just annoying and im like thaTS NOT MISO- like yea people have different severities but the Entire thing about miso is that you Cant ignore it. Its a whole fight flight thing. Like. Its like the difference between “oh, i dont like almonds” and “ok if i eat an almond, even if its one sliver in an entire smoothie, i will die, i am severly allergic” ya know???

Also also, bc this is a miso rant at this point, and im chill w that, you know when someone has The Breath where its Loud or Squeaky or snotty or smthin so ur like ahHHHHHH nd they know about ur miso nd they start making fun of u like breathing harder or being fake offended bc u want me to die like no i love your company but this noise youre making makes me want to take your spine and shove it up ur ass. Hate the sin love the sinner ya know. Also does anyone else get miso-ed by themselves?? Like not usually but sometimes ill be breathing louder than norm or ill be able to hear my heartbeat or the sound of my handflappies nd its like haha No

Anyway anyway, anyone have any miso tips? Im not allowed to eat in my room, nd my dad does the scrapy scrapy tooth with his fork which makes me want to stab it into his eyes, but my mom also has miso so we do The Look, nd again, i cant have headphones when not in the room hes in, so :) no white/brown noise for me :) yea. The feeling of earplugs makes me feel like im swimming through a pool of worms and they also dont work so. Yea.

[egotheplanet]

Stories Over Burgers (Happy Hogan and Morgan Stark)

Summary: for some reason I cant stop picturing Morgan as an outcast in school. Like Lilo from Lilo and Stitch. The line from the movie where Lilos talking to Nani and she says “they’re afraid of me” and Nani says “They just don’t know what to say.” BC HER PARENTS ALSO DIED. I mean, can’t you just imagine ? her dad was fucking iron man and she has so many stories she wants to share bc she loved her daddy 3,000 but a mean kid shows her Mysterios ‘evidence’ about tony being a bad guy. Happy ‘Protective Dad’ Hogan drives to pick her up after school only to see her in the courtyard fighting with one of the kids. I kind of changed the FFH mid credits scene to be a little more detailed about Tony’s part in Spider-Man’s inheritance of the tech. roll with it and be sad with me.

Warnings: spoilers to SM:FFH and Endgame

Word Count: 1.7k

•••••••••••••••••

Happy enviously scans the sidewalk where plenty of timely children sit waiting for their guardians to pick them up.

‘You’d think after 6 hours in a chair the kid would be brimming with pent up energy she could spend running to the car. Maybe I should get her a watch that beeps when it’s time to head to the car loop.’ He thought to himself.

Releasing a long slow exhale through his nose, he unbuckled his seat belt and stepped out of the car. He’s come to learn that if you ask politely, the administrative office will summon your student over the loud speakers.

‘What’s holding her up?’

His walk to the office came to slow down when he heard childish yells and taunts. He grumbled at the association the sound held in his mind. ‘Kids probably fighting in the courtyard over a pudding cup.’

As he continued towards the yard in question, the administrative office nestled at the end of it, he narrowed his eyes and listened closer. ‘That kind of sounds like... Morgan?’

His walking pace hastened into a speed walk as the classic ring of students watching a fight came into view.

Just as he suspected, a little girl consisting mostly of long brown hair could be seen and heard yelling and stomping in anguish. Definitely Morgan. The kids started chanting ‘fight’ and Happy knew it was about to get physical. He quickly jumped in to stop it all together. The sight of an adult/ authoritative figure made the bystanders scatter.

“Alright, now what’s goin on here? Break it up!”

His large adult hand wraps around Morgans minuscule arm gently yet firmly to pull her away. The girls purposefully avoid eye contact.

He lets a huff out of his chest in annoyance at the silence.

“You two had a lot to say a couple seconds ago, why so quiet now? What. Happened?” At this point the principal was standing by and taking in the scene quietly.

Morgan whispers, “She said he was a bad guy.”

Happys brows crease together in confusion as he bends down at the knee so he’s eye level with her, “Who was a bad guy?”

Her voice trembles and her hair, previously pinned back with pink clips which were now lost in the mess of grass beneath them, hides her teary eyes as she can only make a sound of frustration. Being young meant articulating the world with a fraction of functioning vocabulary. It was frustrating, Happy knew that. He and Pepper always took their time with Morgan. Especially after all she’s been through.

“Morgan? Who was a bad guy?” His voice is much softer now.

She continues to refuse to make eye contact.

He sighs and his eye level falls to his shoes upon realizing who was awarded the title ‘bad guy’.

Morgan ripped her arm out of his grasp and backed up about a foot. Her eyes stayed low. She needed a little space to think and breathe through it. Just like he taught her.

Her mother always said ‘You’ve got your fathers looks and brain. It’s fitting you get his temper to top it off.” It was never maliciously spoken. Only... melancholic.

Happy resumed standing and exchanged words with the principal.

It felt like an eternity to Morgan. Her tummy felt upset at the thought of getting into trouble. But it felt even more upset when the girl began to preach about someone she didn’t know.

“Morgan? Did you hear me?” He remained standing tall this time as he spoke to her. “Your principal said you have to stay home tomorrow.” He’s seen her enough to know when she’s about to explode with emotion. “You caused a scene and almost broke into a fight. Your mom is gonna discipline you accordingly. It’s gonna be fine.”

Morgan’s breathing slightly quickened and her throat felt tight. Her eyes were burning hot as she looked up at him and the oceans began pouring out of her tear ducts.

“I’m sorry, Happy.”

He believed her wholeheartedly.

“Let’s just... Let’s head home, okay?” He held his hand out. Open and inviting.

She graciously accepted.

They walked side by side all the way to the car.

Holding open the door, he felt both sad and proud as she buckled herself in.

——————

“Two cheeseburgers, one without onions or pickles and the other with extra onions and pickles. One large fry, one small HI-C and one large Diet Coke. That’ll be all, thank you.”

She played with her hands as he ordered.

The backseat wasn’t very eventful when you lose your iPad for causing a ‘ruckus’ as her mother put it. Happy of course called Pepper as soon as they got into the car. The iPad was the only thing around at the moment that would suffice as a good punishment till they got home. Then she’d get a whole other talk and loss of privilege.

The smell of the car quickly turned from clean leather to hot French fries and ketchup as the bags came in through the window.

Happy put them in the empty passengers seat and rolled into a parking spot on the other side of the building. He turned the car off and passed back her order.

“Don’t forget to use a napkin this time.” He spoke after taking a chunk out of his burger. “Your last ketchup stain was a pain.”

Her lips perked up for the first time in a half hour. A long time for a child like Morgan not to smile.

“That rhymed, Happy!”

He felt a rush of relief pass through him. She wasn’t too upset to enjoy his Seuss-like antics.

“Yeah, I guess it did.” They looked at each other through the rear view window. After a considerable amount of time passed he spoke. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”

The rustling of her burger wrapper ceased.

“No.”

Happy ate a few more bites, finishing the rest of his sandwich. He didn’t want to pry but he needed to make sure this wouldn’t happen again.

He didn’t care about her defending herself. It was the right thing to do. He cared about her feelings being hurt in a place she’s supposed to be happy and learning.

“Can you at least tell me how it started?”

The car was deathly silent for a few seconds straight. The air was loud, louder than they were. Just when he thought the entire subject was a lost cause, he heard a meek voice.

“My teacher was talking about rockets. The space ones.” She paused to recollect, glancing in the mirror and noticing him offer his full attention. “So I told him about daddy’s rockets. I told him how he used them to fly and save people.”

She had to pause between a few words to take audible breaths. It was a hard subject to cover.

“And then I had to go potty so he excused me and when I came back, my table buddies were talking.” She stopped for a couple seconds to take a sip of her juice. “They said their parents watch the news and that it said daddy was a bad guy. That he didn’t really save people and he tried to hurt them.” Her voice was soft and held a confused tone.

Happys heart sank as he tried to think up a way to steer her out of his information hole. He didn’t want her only memories of her father to be tarnished by the bored pieces of crazed writers and an insane super villain. He paused before speaking with a hopeful tone.

“Morgan, do you know how well I knew your dad?” She shook her head. “Well, I started as just a driver. Taking him from spot to spot.”

She perked up. “Like how you drive me to school?”

He smiled slightly. “That’s right. And then he promoted me to head of security.”

“He said you were forehead of secur-”

“See, he always got those words a little fumbled. Th-That wasn’t my title. The point is— Let’s get back on track— the point is: your dad trusted me.” He spoke quickly and jumbled while attempting to get the conversation back on course as she giggled out loud. “We weren’t just people who worked together. We were friends. Close friends. I knew a lot about your dad. I knew stuff about him before he did sometimes.” He thought back to the start of Tony and Peppers relationship. “So believe me when I say this.. are you listening?”

Sensing the change in pace at the end of his speech, she nodded, fully captivated by his words.

“Good, okay.” He locked eyes with her in the mirror. “Your dad loved you so much, kiddo. He loved you. He loved your mom too.” He took a moment to unbuckle his seatbelt and turn around so he could look at her formally. “He loved people. He protected you, your mom and everyone in the world until the very end.”

She was too young to grasp the levity of his words but he continued. She needed to hear this so her father could remain the hero he was in her little mind.

“He never once hurt anyone intentionally without the protection of everyone else he loved in mind. Your table buddies didn’t know him the way I did. So you can trust me and ignore them, okay? Your dad was a good man, not a bad guy. I would know.” She was quiet. Not the bad quiet but the thinking to herself quiet.

“Okay.”

He chuckled softly at her graceful lack of words. His were definitely too much for an eight year old.

“You know what? I’m gonna tell you something.” He held a joking tone which was barely above a whisper.

“What?” She matched his tone with a small smile.

“Your dads rockets didn’t always work. Sometimes they knocked him onto his butt.” He smiled fondly at the memories as she laughed.

“That’s funny, Happy.” She munched on a French fry and sipped the rest of her juice. Her feet kicked and swayed the whole drive home. Her mood had significantly increased.

As Happy drove himself home later that night, he reflected on how much Tony gave to others. The muddy and wrong picture Mysterio painted of him wasn’t right and wasn’t fair.

It was then and there he decided that for every bad story Morgan heard about Tony that made her cry, he would tell her two more that would make her laugh. Happy meal included.

And boy, did he have enough stories to last a lifetime.

[laracroftsleatherjacket]

Flower Asks: all of them >:3€ (forgive me)

(this is so many omg but I’ll allow it only bc i love u)

Alisons: Sexuality? 

     Gay af (ace lesbean)

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

     Waman (she/they)

Amaryllis: Birthday?

     November 2nd

Anemone: Favorite flower?

     Funnily enough anemones are one of my favs but i think my top favs are chrysanthemums and morning glories but I really love many flowers and flowers in general

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

     As of right now, stranger things duh

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

     Like favors or? I mean I really do try to be a kind and helpful person but if I don’t know somebody or haven’t at least seen them a couple times before I usually don’t do much bc of anxiety 

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

     "The extraordinary is in what we do, not who we are.” Lara Croft mostly bc I cant think of anything else right now and that stuck with me

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

     Like a really good cup of black tea with cream and sugar or sweet tea

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

     Never been kissed before but I definitely have someone in mind I would kiss ;3

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

     Hell yeah I am right now and I don’t think I ever have been before now

Baneberries: Favorite song?

     Oh hard question... currently really digging We Fell In Love in October by Girl in Red 

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

     My family is supportive (for the most part) and very loving, even if they express love in weird ways sometimes. We also like to joke around a lot and make fun of each other but in a good way? Like we all have a good time mostly and I get along better with everyone since I started college

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

     My girlfriend is my best friend uwu I also have a lot of good friends but yeah

Begonia: Favorite color?

     Purble but specifically like a pastel purple and purples that lean more towards blue than pink

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

     Lynx! I love so many animals tho and I also like many cats and domestic cats in general

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

     Night!

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

     Probably would love to just be a loved house cat who gets to lay in front of the fire all day or a lynx bc i love them

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

     A veterinarian (or a special agent lmao)! I also still plan on being a vet tho even tho I get discouraged at least once a month 

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

     I mean I like kids and I was a camp counselor for a summer, but I dont really want any of my own

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

     Oh god so many things.. Biggest thing would maybe be death/dying? Like if i think about it too much like the possibility of there just being nothing after death freaks me out. That and throwing up/nausea 

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

     I played soccer and then I was a competitive swimmer so i was kind of an athlete? even tho i hated sports

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?  

     I think I would like to go to waffle house, have the perfect cup of tea, spend lots of time with my loved ones and pet my kitties, play video games with my gf, and sit under a tree in the mountains preferably on a warmer day in the fall and watch the sunset 

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

     Very happily taken

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

     Always wanted to visit Norway

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

      Really big long hugs, good morning or goodnight messages, and I also really love cards 

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?  

     I have 6 

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

     Yup! I have an industrial, orbital, and 3 earlobe piercings   

California Poppy: Height?  

     5′2 or maybe a little less

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

     Yeah I think so, but I do also get freaked out easily lmao

Carnation: What are you currently wearing? 

     Red flannel, jeans, fuzzy socks, and big dyke boots  

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

     Yeah I did for a long time and I still sometimes sleep with one or like a bathroom light on if Im sleeping by myself in a new place

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?  

     Either my mom or my dad I dont remember technically who was last bc my parents are visiting me at college

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

     Again, never kissed or been kissed! but maybe soon... :0

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

     Font? I like the font in Night in the Woods?

Columbine: Are you tired?

     Pretty much always either sleepy or tired lol

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

     Christmas, getting to see my gf again, and Magfest!

Coneflower: Dream job?

     Like a veterinarian but having my own practice and also being able to take in injured wildlife if possible

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

     Introvert for sure

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

     Oh repeat question, hell yes

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

     Depends what it is but I would go pretty far for somebody I care about and Im also a crazy person and would drive/travel no matter what distance for someone I love

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

     Yup! I had a ballerina bunny, named Bunny because I was very creative and I still have her

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

     Scorpio

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

     I think so? I did a lot of cool stuff with my GS troop like our bronze award project and going ziplining and to sliding rock. 

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

     My GS gold award for sure, that shit was hard work and stressful af

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?  

     Umm??? I would tell my dad to eat shit and die and I cant imagine my mom being anything but sweet and supportive so I dont even know

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

     You! This morning uwu

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

     uhh Im pretty good at making sense of stuff in my science labs and reasoning and im sometimes good at art? I feel like I do traditional better but Im getting better at digital

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

     bad at not being impulsive sometimes and bad at dead by daylight 

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

     a little over a month but officially got a girlfriend who i love very much, my gf came down to visit and we got to chill on the mountains together, and I had a pretty nice birthday 

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

     Good! Got breakfast at a diner with my parents and got coffee and a donut at my fav coffee shop so thats all i really need in life tbh 

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

     Yeah Im happy even tho Im stressed with school at times 

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

     Get a job after graduation and hopefully get into vet school on the first or second try

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

     My kitty, mom, wonderful gf, sister, dead by daylight, heated blanket, apartment, waffle house, my sisters kitty, and my dog

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?  

     Donuts, coffee or tea, blankets, video games, and loud music

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

     Hmm... I really like to draw art for those i love, tell them how much i love them even though i can be bad with words, and i just try to spend a lot of time with the people I care about no matter what we are doing

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

     uhhh trying to open up more? and Im really proud of my gf 

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

     Going to waffle house. Go to a mountain and hike a little, sit on the top with girlfriend. Admire beauty of mountain countryside. Admire beauty of girlfriend while they admire the beauty of the mountain. Then warm up together with hot chocolate and play video games

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?  

     I like to doodle and do the arts, play video games, and I like to bake sometimes

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

     uuuuuuh I have a good friend I’ve known since kindergarten or first grade when I first moved to where I currently live

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

     My gf uwu and my mem

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

     probably like less than 10 

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

     I think its really cute especially when you compliment my laugh

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

     ??? I think I am an okay person? And I try to be a good person and be kind and polite to people

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

     Umm... I mean I like that Im kind? and Im not fake and I try to be a good person     

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?  

      I hate that I procrastinate and that I can get frustrated easily at myself and at situations like crowds and traffic

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

     I liked to play ‘restaurant’ with my sister with our littlest pet shops

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

     I had a really great best friend named Rachel :c

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

     Losing a lot of friends and for being distant for a long time 

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?  

     Cutting off a friend that was bad for my mental health and who didnt treat me well even though we were best friends for a long time 

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

     My name is literally my parents ship name... like they even told me they chose my name by putting their names together lmao but I mean I like my name so i guess its okay..

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

     Small town in new jersey when I was really, it was nice and family was closer. Then we moved and that was difficult but I ended up adjusting and it was good, had a decent amount of friends and the schools i went to were good

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

     For a long time I shared a room with my sister and we had a bunkbed and I had the top bunk of course, when we moved out of the apartment and into a house I got my own room and it was baby blue only because I told my dad that no, I didnt want a fuckin pink room and that was a whole thing lmao

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?  

    It was good? but also sucked a lot. I had a lot of issues with my mental health and struggled for a long while with something. I was bullied and stuff at home wasnt always that great. And i got outed so that was fun. Other than that I enjoyed swimming competitively and I got into art

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

I love my mom!! she is the most Mom mom and is so sweet and always there for me. She helps me out so much with so many things and I just love my mom so much

Onions: Tell about your dad.  

     I mean I love my dad? And hes better than he used to be, but he still doesnt help with shit and irritates me a lot. 

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

     I never got to know my grandfather on my moms side bc he passed away a few months before i was born and I sort of knew my grandmother but she lived far away and passed away 10 years ago. I usually see my gramma on my dads side the most and I try to visit often and help her out with stuff and I love her even though she can be a bit... racist and shit.. and I sometimes see my grandpa and step grandma but they can be strict about weird shit and always ask a lot of uncomfortable questions

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

     I dont really do much on my birthdays? Ive had a lot of nice birthdays and it usually involves going out to dinner or having a nice dinner at home and having birthday cake and playing games like jenga or yahtzee.

Peony: What was your first job?

     I did some petsitting for a while but my first real job was being a camp counselor/tower belayer/lifeguard at a girl scout camp

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)?

     Met online after following them for a long time and drawing some arts for them, but didnt really start chatting until stranger things 3 came out bc I saw they had just watched it. Didnt meet irl until fursonacon and I just remember seeing them walking up to my car when I got there and just being like .... oh no.  I had already had a crush but at that point I was just heart eyes      

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

     Its a little fucked up but depending on the type of physical pain I like it? Like getting tattoos and stuff.. emotional/mental I just curl up in blankets and listen to sad music lol

Pink: Where is home?

    I feel like I have many homes? I feel really at home in the mountains, at home with my family, and when Im with my girlfriend

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

     Every event no matter how shitty shaped me into who i am today and Im pretty content and lucky with what I have today so maybe nothing?

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

     My GS leader Miss Kristin. So incredibly kind and outgoing and just willing to do whatever she can to help others. Shes so adventurous and outgoing and made my gs troop so amazing. She is such a wonderful lady and shes basically like another mom to me.

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

     To be with my SO in a nice cabin in the mountains with a nice fireplace. Its cozy and we have pets (especially kitties but also maybe a dog and chickens and such) and life is okay and we’re happy

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

     God and Santa Claus (i was so heartbroken (over santa not God lmao))

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

     My girlfriend and my mom

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

    My gfs voice and their laugh c: and I also really like the sound of thunderstorms and rain

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?  

     To see my gf again and for winter break to just be here already I am so done with school lol

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

     Difficult? I try really hard to express how I feel but I usually mess up and I get anxious but I try my best lol

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

     Any of my loved ones and my cat 

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

     I wish I got more sleep but it was an okay amount

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

     Good morning texts from my gf and my gf in general

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

      I dont currently have a job but I occasionally do art commissions which is usually fun and gives me something to do 

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

     Any of my flannels and my leather jacket (also not mine but my gfs hoodie they gave to me to borrow)

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic. 

     mountains, cabins, flowers, fall, flannel, small coffee shops, pastels 

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

     Im not one to be picky about gifts? I just love anything that someone put some thought into and thought I would like or reminded them of me but i feel bad if it was something expensive or anything lol

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

     Final exams and graduation

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

     0 lmao I used to read a shit ton but Ive been picky about what books I want to read lately 

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

    Working towards applying to vet school and maybe thinking about moving out depending on a lot of things.

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

     Unfortunately

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

     I like collecting pins, pennies, and postcards which is funny to me

(So in conclusion,,, I love my gf)

(wow that was long as hell and took forever but done!)

[wikipediathefreeencyclopedia]

compilation of my favorite otp prompts 5

tag

cute weather/seasonal AUs your OTP [x]

when it rains

who wears the designer raincoat/umbrella set and who is wearing oversized polkadot rainboots and a huge yellow duck raincoat

going for a walk in the rain and splashing in puddles

which one seduces the other into standing under a tree before shaking the branch and soaking them

gOING SWIMMING IN THE RAIN and making out maybe 

fall (aka autumn)

who buys mulled cider, who buys hard cider

who wears the really intense halloween costume, who wears a sheet with holes in it 

snow/winter

Who builds the snowman, who eats the carrot nose bc they weren’t paying attention (”OH THATS what the carrot was for, my bad”)

oh no we stayed out too long and need to warm up better share the shower/hot chocolate to conserve resources

person A burying person B in snow and then kissing their forehead and walking away (“YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU CANT LEAVE ME HERE” “I love you too I’ll be back!” “EXCUSE ME”) 

imagine your competitive otp [x]

making ridiculous bets on whose wind-up toy will win the race (may include sabotage)

having a food competition (with a food both of them hate)

having a cake-baking competition

sabotaging each other in mario kart

Some height difference things for your OTP [x]

The taller one sitting on the floor between the shorter one’s knees as the shorter one braids/plays with their hair. 

The shorter one tackle-hugging the taller one when they come home from some sort of trip, hoping that they’ll both fall to the floor in a pile of limbs and cuddles/kisses, but unfortunately the shorter one isn’t strong/heavy enough and they both remain standing. 

Bonus: to compensate, the taller one decides to pick the shorter one up. 

The shorter one having to sprawl like half their body across the taller one whenever they ride the bus/train so as to give the taller one all the leg room.

Or, the shorter one sitting down and immediately noticing that their feet don’t touch the floor, becoming embarrassed by this, and then pretending that they’d rather just snuggle up super tight with the taller one.

Bonus: the taller one realizes exactly what’s going on but says nothing. Or teases them endlessly about it, up to you.

The shorter one physically sitting in the taller one’s lap.

The taller one standing behind the shorter one and putting their arms around their shoulders, then resting their chin on top of the shorter one’s head. 

Bonus if they’re watching the stars/sunset/ocean together.

Imagine your OTP: Orchestra edition [x]

‘I didn’t bring my music but you gave me your extra copy and I blurted out that I loved you, and we could have awkwardly moved past that but then you accidentally said that you loved me back’

‘I was in the very back row of your concert so I could barely see the stage but I was so impressed with your performance that I decided to hang around and see if I could meet you, and it turns out that you are actually very cute holy shit’

AU List #3 (Theme: Jobs/Work) [x]

“You stood up for me against that really rude costumer who almost made me cry, thank you.”

random aus to consider though [x]

we pulled an all nighter trying to play monopoly and i think i may have confessed some weird shit

Hospital OTP Prompts [x]

I’m a bit loopy on the drugs they gave me for the pain and I told you that I love you and it’s the only thing I remember afterwards AU

The doctor is constantly telling you off cause you keep making my heart beat go faster when you’re talking to me AU

Things I need to be written [x]

person B is a half mermaid and person A orders the salmon for the both of them

Who wants some AUs? [x]

“‘You’re gonna get a cold if you stand out in the rain!’” AU

“I’m on the swings at the park and looking real depressed why did you come over to talk to me?” AU

Weird OTP Prompts for all your fanfiction needs [x]

You’re colourblind, and I managed to get you glasses that will let you see all the colours, but instead of being amazed, you’re just really offended by the colour purple, and you’re yelling at me for wearing a purple shirt.

“Do you masturbate?” “I–I’m sorry, do I know you?” “No, now answer the question.”

I’m colourblind, and you gave me these really awesome glasses that let me see colour, and I’m pretending to really hate the colour purple because I want you to take your shirt off. But really, purple is a fucking ugly colour.

Some of my actual experiences in musicals/plays... [x]

hey we’ve never talked before so now we’re playing love interests how about that AU

hey we’ve been good friends for years so now we’re playing love interests how about that AU

I play a police officer and at one point I get to arrest and drag your character offstage and I’m having a little too much fun with it AU

Did somebody say OTP PROMPTS? [x]

Person A dips Person B (like the dance move, but then get distracted and drops them).

A walking in on B absolutely killing it at Just Dance.

Person B wins Person A a gigantic stuffed animal at the fair.

Person B reading to Person A on the couch to help them fall asleep.

A and B having no mercy on each other in Super Smash Bros.

Person A playfully teasing Person B about how cute they are.

your otp finding each other annoyingly endearing [x]

you’re so stoic or deadpan most of the time but when you get flustered your face lights up red like a beacon and it’s so cute.

you have no idea what personal space is and it’s really distracting when your face is two inches away from mine, what if i turn my head and accidentally kiss you

you don’t like snuggling or a lot of touching but when you’re asleep you’re a cuddler for better or for worse

MORE AUs for you [x]

you’re a magician and you pick me to be your assistant for a trick but the real magic is how you managed to slip your phone number to me while you were sawing me in half au

I made my thousandth paper crane and wished to find my soulmate and the next day you move in next door to me what does this mean au

AUs based (loosely) on things that have happened to me recently [x]

I just watched you fill up a container with dry dog food biscuit by biscuit what the hell are you doing

76 OTP prompts list [x]

Person B is reeaaaaaally tired, but Person A is super, super energetic and loud. Trying to get Person A to shut up, Person B kisses Person A.

Imagine person A of your OTP relentlessly flirting with B in public, just to see B blush.

Imagine Person A of your OTP seeing Person B with bed hair for the first time, and being totally blown away by how cute/hot/etc. they look with their hair being a huge mess. Bonus: if Person A gets flustered when Person B pokes fun at them for liking it.

Imagine your OTP getting in a fight and one of them yelling that they love the other one and then it gets really quiet.

Imagine your OTP cuddling under a blanket on a cold winter night. Person A gently wrapping their arms around Person B and lightly kissing down their neck making Person B shiver from something other than the cold outside.

Imagine your OTP running into each other under the mistletoe. Person A blushes and goes to suggest that they don’t have to kiss but Person B cuts them off with a kiss.

Imagine person A walking out of the bathroom after a shower, half-naked and wreathed in steam, and B immediately dropping whatever they were holding. Bonus if it’s an animal which gives them the stink eye before slinking away.

Imagine your OTP living in a dorm. Person A thinks that person B is kinda cute, but otherwise doesn’t feel much for them. Person A goes to borrow a textbook from person B and walks in on person B in their pajamas with their hair all messed up and person A thinks it’s the cutest thing ever.

Imagine person A of your otp is reading a book late at night and person B can’t sleep so they ask person A to read to them so person A starts reading out loud and a few minutes later person B is completely knocked out and person A gives them a kiss on their forehead.

Being on the brink of admitting their feelings for each other but then getting interrupted.

“You were trying to reach for a box of cereal and a whole shelf’s-worth of cereal boxes fell on you here let me help”

OTP Prompts [x]

Imagine Person A seeing Person B and just having the most powerful, undeniable urge to have sex. Just out of the blue with no provocation except for Person B’s existence. Bonus if they’re having conflicting feelings about acting upon the urge because they’re in public.

no title [x] 

‘i keep bumping into you everywhere and you’re starting to get weirded out but i’m not stalking you it’s just a string of coincidences i swear no wait let me explain’ au

Random OTP Prompts [x]

Everyone I talk to mentions you at some point and I didn’t get it but now we’ve met and I do. I definitely do.

We knew each other when we were like 2 years old because our moms are friends and we haven’t seen each other since but now your family is visiting and you’re a lot hotter than you were when you were a toddler.

Everyone thinks I have a crush on your friend but actually I like you which is even more embarrassing.

Reunited AUs [x]

“we’re texting for the first time in forever and i told you about some stupid thing i did and sent a sarcastic ‘you must really miss me, huh’ and you just replied ‘yes’ and i think my heart just broke” au

Spoopy Halloween AU’s for ur OTP!!! [x]

we were supposed to go on a double date to this horror movie but neither of our dates showed up and it’s really just our friends trying to get us together 

we both got dragged to this stuffy Halloween party by our parents wanna kiss in the corner? 

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Yaaay!! Thank you Soraya's inbox, sorry i blamed you on eating the last ask😂😘. You did great. Nono, he wasnt a torero, he looked like a prince. (Which is not better bcs i dont like any of those  figures but... whatever). Ooh, talking about suits, did you see the ranking hsfashionarchive did of the suits he wore this tour? Bcn was winning, pink suit was second and Mdd was third!! (1)

[I hope this works 😜🙏🏻, bc this was TOO long, jajajaa.]

Ohhh. Your mom is the best. So supportive! Petition to give her that award. She is clearly the winner. (1D clinex? capitalism in its pure state 😂. Did they really made those? Glad i didnt find it on time bcs i would have definitely brought them as a joke to my sister or something). You are already playing Niall’s songs to her? Did she like them? Does she have anything similar to “pikachu get away” she had for SOTT?. (2)

JAJAJAJJA. Netflix always does that to me too. Dont know why. I started watching Black mirror backwards bcs of that. Did you understand anything of chapter 7 os ST? (Did you finish the show??). Yep. The 8th season is the last one, and i dont know hoe to feel about it. Dissapointed by the shows? As in with the ending?? Or how? (3)

You sound like a devoted cat lady, yes. Ooow, i have little cousins too, though they are reaching the age of “too cool to be seen with you, old girl” Of course they make me laugh. Honey is a menace and i appreciate it. JAJAJAJAJAJAJA. He ate the chorizo?? Honeeey!! 😂😂😂 that made me laugh at loud int the train and now my neighbour is looking at me weirdly. I see, you’ll never get bored with him. (4)

When i was younger and + close minded, i didnt like tattos. Considere also that the ones I had saw in real life were the tribal ones, so there’s tgat. But then i grew up and started liking them (you can partially blame larry for that). Nobody in my family (cousins and so) has one, and thats kind of a encouragement, I’d love to piss them, but my dad has threaten me to disinherit me (we dont heven have that, lol) and i dont have any tatto on mind, so i wont do it… maybe in the future, yes. (5)

I MISS LOUIS TOO! I hope he is fine. Resting and so. Im sure that creating the album that will destroy us all takes a lot of effort. (Seriously, where is heeeee?). Heeey!! I wont get bored. Or mad! I have such a great time talking to you. If i dont talk more its bcs of the character limit and bcs im always worried about pressuring or imposing. Dont be dumb. If i dont answer its bcs im busy with finals and so. Nothing more. Promise. (6)

THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING. i know i know. It makes sense and its a smart move, but… i cant stand raeggeton/latino, its not for me. Sad. I havent lost hope though. Maybe ill change my mind later Yeah, i have the same problem with my friends, they only listen to trap and raeggeton and i die everytime. We mostly agree to put something neutral like pop or the radio. (Disney songs never get old😂). (7)

Ay. I just saw that i wrote “heven” instead of “even” and now i want to delete myself. I was walking while writing the asks and i didnt proofread it. I feel so dumb. Anyway, sorry for sending so many asks (today i made a record xd) and, as always, good night!!————————————————————————-Hi!!!! Yes! I saw the ranking. But it isn’t exactly a ranking. It’s more to like chose wants your favorite suit. I did it and guess what? My first choice in the Madrid one, jajajaa. Second the kilt. And third the jumpsuit. Very accurate.

Oh, you’re telling me! My family bought me a bunch of 1D merch (unofficial all): the clinex, a hair brush, a bracelet, 2 books!, one perfume (this I love it, it smells so good), a make up box… I can’t even remember everything. Ah! A birthday card too!! Where they talk when you open it. I always use to wish happy birthday to people (the audio) 🤣🤣🤣🤣. I had to tell them to please stop wasting money on those things. I don’t even know where I have it. And if a can ask, I’d rather they give me the money so I can go to their concerts,jajajaja.EDIT: I can’t believe I forgot the poster!! I have it beside my head right now,jajaja, and I only realized it was there when I looked at the boys to ask for inspiration,😅😅)

Oh, my mom loves Niall’s album too. But I don’t think she “knows” any of the lyrics,jajaja. Though, she knows the hmmmm in This Town. But that’s all. She and my sister, both separately were like: “oh! who’s him??” When they heard Fire Away. And I was like: “ehhhhh, it’s Niall’s album, so guess who’s it?? What, you like it? See, Harry’s not the only one who can sing…” jajajajja. It’s because of comments like this, that they think I don’t like Harry. And I get so offended when they hint at it! Like, of course I like Harry. But I like all of them too!! God!! I love Niall’s album so much (I’m hearing it right now, bc I couldn’t remember what song was the one they liked it so much, and now I can’t stop 😅). Harry’s and Niall’s albums have been lining in my car since they were released. I had Harry’s playing in a loop till I got Niall’s one and I interchanged them. Then Harry’s came back a month or so before his concert. And now it’s time for Niall’s again. (You can’t imagine how hard it’s being writing this with honey laying on my arm!! Jajaja, I can’t barely move my fingers😅).

AND WHAT DID YOU DO WHEN YOU REALIZED YOU WERE WATCHING BLACK MIRROS BACKWARDS??? I’ve watched canter 1 and 2 of ST afterwards, but I hadn’t gotten to watch the whole thing yet. I can’t stand to be looking at a screen for 50minutes without doing anything. And don’t get me wrong, lol, I can be on tumblr for hours, jajaja, but a have to move my hand, and I can go from a blog to another… y'know, jajajajaja. And when I watched chapter 7 of ST i was like, okay… now they have to investigate what happened… or a guessed they would be doing flashbacks… jajajajajaja. Then I realized my mistake and thought I was stupid, 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣“I see you from a different point of view🎶🎶” ( sorry, that’s me singing,jajajaja, Seeing Blind. I LOVE that song)And shows have disappointed me in the sense that they turn out to have an awful ending (seriously, I know you do it for the audience, but end a show how it deserves it, don’t turn it into shit just for a handful of money); or bc they just end it bc they don’t have enough audience. It’s always a matter of audience,jajaja.if they have a lot, they want to explode it. And if they don’t have enough they finish it ASAP. 😒

Honey is a menace, yeh, I couldn’t love him more,jajajaja. He can’t see me petting Liam, he gets jealous and comes to me and headbutt my hand so I pet him too. And Liam is so patient with him. They’re totally like liam and Louis, jajja. Hey! did I tell you the story about when I got Liam? no!! Well, someone gave my dad 4 kitties (they were sooooo small). So, guess their names (it was post March 25, 2015…) yes!! They were named (by me) Louis, Niall, Harry and Liam, jajajajajja. But Harry died a couple of days later, because he was really really young. He couldn’t survive without his mom ☹️. And the other three, my dad took them to a place we have were he has a little garden (?) with vegetables and chickens and proper farm-y, jejeje. I wasn’t too (any) into cats back then, so… Then he brought home one of them, to have our home free of mice. AND IT WAS LIAM!! And I adopted him. I took care of him. We started loving each other. And he became useless with mice, jajaja. He’s totally domesticated now 😝. And that’s his story. The rest? Louis became a big alpha male at their new home. But s car ran him over last summer, and he died 😔. And Niall is a female, jajajajaa. And I hate her. Because she hasn’t been able to keep her kitties alive once!! (She’s pregame again, and we’re praying this time she knows who to be a mom🙏🏻) Ah!! And Honey had siblings the other day!! The guy who gave it to my dad is my brother’s friend and he show him a pic. There are two white cats!! I WANT THEM!!! But they don’t let me have anymore cats! Jajajajaja.

Hey, we might have in common the reason why we started liking tats, jajajjajaa. And, well, to piss off the family is as good a reason as any other,jajajaja. And why are dads like that?? When my sister and I got our lips pierced he went to pick up at the train station and as soon as he saw us he turned around and walked to the car without saying a word,jajajajja. I HAD TOLMY PARENTS WE WOULD BE DOING IT!! I asked my mom:hey mom, if a get a 10 in maths, can I get a piercing?? And she say okay. So I got a 10 (I might cheated or not on this, bc I already knew I had a 10, but wel…), and I got a piercing.my sister only got it, bc I was 16, she had to go with me as an adult, and giving she was already there, she got one too,jajajaja. (My granny almost kill us 😅)

Oh, louis has a BIG responsibility on his hands. He will be killing a lot of people when he puts out his album. He has to chose the proper songs to do it. It will be considered a massive destruction weapon, so he better be careful. But god, for real, when will Louis and Liam release their albums. At this pace, Harry and Niall will be releasing their second one before LiLo has finished their respective tours. And when they finish, Narry will have release their second one, and will be promoting them. So Lilo will start working in their seconds one. And… and… AND ONE DIRECTION WON’T COME BACK EVER BECAUSE THEY CAN FIX A DATE WHERE ALL OF THE BOYS HAVE NOTHING TO DO, AND WHAT WILL I DO??? 😭😭😭😭😭 (sorry, I panicked a bit there,oops).

Uggggg, I can’t stand raeggeton either. I can’t stand the music, argggg. Or the culture of it (the how it treats women, and glorifies sex). I can’t I can’t.and you can’t go out without hearing it. My friends and I went on road trip once. And it was my friend’s car. And she only listens to raeggeton. And after 10, 15, 40? minutes I had to ask her “will this song ever end???” And she told me it was already a different one. And I swear I almost jump out of the car,jajajajaja. We were crossing a bridge, and I wanted to jump out of the car!!!!! I couldn’t listen to that any more!!!!!  Ejkbvwirbfeuirnfrvoieefvnv The she caved and we switched to movie’s soundtracks,jajajaja.

Ha! Don’t worry about sending a lot of ask, I learn something, you’ll see,jajajajaa.Also, I forgot to ask early. Is your sister a 1d fan too, then? She goes to concerts and knows the song… how lucky! you have someone to talk about all the gossip!! (And they know what you’re talking about…) or is she a “casual” fan, and doesn’t get into fandom drama? She just likes the music and doesn’t care about their lives?are you both into drama?? God, I don’t discuss drama very much online, but if had someone face to face to talk about it… I would be the happiest person in the world,jajajajaa (what an exaggeration 🙊).

I think this is all. I LOVE ORPUR CONVERSATIONS!! Jajajaja( I hope I did it correctly and all this is under read more, jajaja)Byeeeeee!!!! 😚😚😚😚

[transfagged]

all 92 😘

1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?no way man she’d probably dom the fuck out of me

2. You talked to an ex today, correct?nope.

3. Have you taken someones virginity?n o p e

4. Is trust a big issue for you?YEAH

5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently?like in terms of romantic??? no. like in terms of “we have a really weird relationship and idfk how i feel @ you”? yeah.

6. What are you excited for?april 19th!!! my friend and i are going to go see phoebe bridgers in madison!!!!

7. What happened tonight?its 10am so ill roll with last night: i played nv and got killed in a beautiful cacophony of deathclaws and the legion :) and then my game crashed.

8. Do you think it’s disgusting when girls get really wasted?no bc id be right there with them

9. Is confidence cute?very

10. What is the last beverage you had?i think some water? okay not the last but: hot water is so good with wildflower honey pls just drink some its good for your soul okay???

11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?opposite is bullshit but i guess like,, 3? half my friends are nonbinary so counting EVERYONE regardless of gender and shit id say 6 people

12. Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?im a proud supporter of boys in skinny jeans and i own 2 or 3 pairs

13. What are you gonna do Saturday night?my main ho @thebonerfoy is coming up to visit me and were probably gonna pack all my shit in her car and play cards against humanity

14. What are you going to spend money on next? lmao probably my student loans. unless i can get the hours i asked for at work or a sugar daddy, then im gonna buy a proper lid for my fishtank bc my poor kid has a piece of cardboard rn.

15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed?no

16. Do you think you’ll change in the next 3 months?yeah. even in a state of stagnation were changing somehow.

17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?probably amanda, but im working on trying to be better with everyone

18. The last time you felt broken?my dude, im broken right now. its okay though. like i said, im working on it. were all fckn broken somehow.

19. Have you had sex today?not unless a ghost and i got in on in my sleep. which would be pretty cool ngl

20. Are you starting to realize anything?on a deep level: i deserve respect and a lot of my issues relate directly to my upbringing, including my inability to receive praise or speak well of myselfon a not-deep level: kinda hungry.

21. Are you in a good mood?i think i just heard fedex or ups outside so my mood just skyrocketed

22. Would you ever want to swim with sharks?maybe like. nurse sharks. theyre really cute.

23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s?yeah

24. What do you want right this second?to take a day to go into the city with all my friends that i cant see on a regular basis

25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?probably be upset unless we discussed it beforehand. then id be fckn cheering for them like you go get some!!!! do it man!!!! in general tho: if i wasnt with them and they didnt show interest in me and showed interest in someone else id just move tf on.

26. Is your current hair color your natural hair color?half of it is bc my roots are growing out

27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?no. too boring.

28. What was the last thing that made you laugh?okay so i went to renew my library books and one of my favorite youtubers is on the library website dressed as one of his characters and i completely flipped because i watch his gaming channel and now hes interviewing authors for my library??? he doesnt even live in my town!! hes in madison!!

29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now?no? im enjoying my solitude atm

30. Does everyone deserve a second chance?depends on the person

31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?no! hes my friend and gives really good advice!

32. Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?i think so. i mean, were kind of a thing.

33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?yeah.

34. Listening to?killer - phoebe bridgers

35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore?only if im doing a rough journal spread, which i dont normally do

36. Do you know where the last person you kissed is?hes probably in class right now. 

37. Do you believe in love at first sight?love at first sight? no. some sort of mutual infatuation/attraction? yes.

38. Who did you last call?my mom

39. Who was the last person you danced with?dancing with as in both dancing at the same time? probably amanda or my mom.

40. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?we were dating and he was cute lmao

41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? a couple months ago? 

42. Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?no bc she leaves for work before i wake up

43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?constantly.

44. Do you tan in the nude?lmao no.

45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss?no. as previously stated, i liked the guy and he was cute. why would i take that back?

46. Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?yeah

47. Who was the last person to call you?my mom

48. Do you sing in the shower?sometimes

49. Do you dance in the car?yEAH

50. Ever used a bow and arrow?yes i love my bow :’) its so good and wow i love archery

51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?picture day junior year of highschool, and if that doesnt count: my mother took me in at jcp to have pictures taken when i graduated 8th grade and theyre awful bc my hair is so long and its so not me

52. Do you think musicals are cheesy?excuse me, how dare you,, in this house we ask for war and peace for christmas because npgc1812 is so good and then get addicted to ghost quartet (@ anyone reading this: pls listen to ghost quartet it is so so so good)

53. Is Christmas stressful?depends on the year, but i hope in the future i can spend it with my friends :)

54. Ever eat a pierogi?i just had some last night for dinner and im probably going to eat the leftovers in a couple minutes. also, my mother is polish and we see her family for holidays, so yeah. lots of pierogi in this house.

update: i got the leftovers

55. Favorite type of fruit pie?idk??? apple? im basic okay i dont eat pie

56. Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?1. teacher2. ballerina3. both 1 & 2, simultaneously4. paleontologist5. archaeologist6. both 4 & 5, simultaneously7. librarian8. game designer9. author/illustrator

57. Do you believe in ghosts?yeah

58. Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?almost daily

59. Take a vitamin daily?im supposed to ;) vitamin d deficiency like a real champ

60. Wear slippers?real talk i never liked slippers but then i bought these cute pig slippers @ walmart for $10 and i love them so much i tried wearing them to sleep last night. also im wearing them rn theyre so cute

61. Wear a bath robe?i live in a dorm, so yeah. to the bathroom and back when i take a shower. sometimes im lazy and i just run around in a towel but so do half the people on my side of the hall lmao were all lazy and dead inside

62. What do you wear to bed?fluffy pajama pants or sweats, tshirt or hoodie, socks, sometimes slippers.. once i fell asleep with a beanie on. when im being an Adult i wear my actual pajamas!!! like a legit shirt and pants that match

63. First concert?none that i was old enough to remember :’) apparently my mom took me to the rodeo when we lived in texas and saw some country group but i was like 2 so idfk

64. Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?TARGET I AM A CERTIFIED TARGET GAY

65. Nike or Adidas?adidas bc my feet are too wide to fit in nikes

66. Cheetos Or Fritos?yall real talk i used to love cheetos but i think im allergic to them now? last time i had them my throat got all swollen and hurt for like 3 days so im gonna have to say fritos. plus theyre really good if you put them in chili

67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?sunflower seeds bc im a slut for anything i can have a spitting contest with

68. Favorite Taylor Swift song?lmao i used to like her when i was like. 11. not my scene anymore

69. Ever take dance lessons?i dont think so?

70. Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?anything that makes them happy, but also something fun!!!! like wedding photographer or a baker or maybe zookeeper?

71. Can you curl your tongue?idk??? kinda????? i can tie a cherry stem so i want to say yes.

72. Ever won a spelling bee?no i always got out bc my anxiety made me stutter/rush and miss letters, so i never even got past the classroom levels to the real thing

73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy?a lot!!! i laugh so hard i cry and get a stomach ache more than id like to admit

74. What is your favorite book?eleanor & park by rainbow rowell :) OR alice’s adventures in wonderland by lewis caroll

75. Do you study better with or without music?depends on if i can get into hyperfocus mode or not. if not, then i pick one song and put it on loop and blast it until it fades and is just loud background noise, but if i can focus then silence is best

76. Regularly burn incense?i used to but no burning anything in the dorms :( then i came home for break and it started giving me a headache

77. Ever been in love?i think so

78. Who would you like to see in concert?kesha, against me!, my chemical romance (rip), bigbang (also rip)

79. What was the last concert you saw?the one i mentioned earlier @ a rodeo

80. Hot tea or cold tea?hot tea

81. Tea or coffee?i live on coffee but i love tea too so both

82. Favorite type of cookie?mmm snickerdoodle. or just sugar cookies. chocolate chip is good when theyre hot and melty but not as good when theyre cold

83. Can you swim well?yeah! i love swimming!

84. Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?yeah?

85. Are you patient?hahahahahahhahahahhahahhaa

86. DJ or band, at a wedding?oo. oooooo. okay so dj would have more variety of music but im a sucker for live music??? idk i feel like a band would be more memorable, but what if they fuck up your favorite song??? but what if they make it more special???????

87. Ever won a contest?yeah! i won an art contest once and got my drawing printed on christmas cards for a nonprofit that did things for cancer patients!

88. Ever have plastic surgery?im 17 i dont have that kind of money

89. Which are better black or green olives?depends on what theyre in?

90. Opinions on sex before marriage?good. live your life fuck the rules

91. Best room for a fireplace?bedroom!!! i love fireplaces in bedrooms its such a Look

92. Do you want to get married?idk. if it happens then it happens. im not planning on it though.