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bored-mumma · 4 years

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Loki - Fluff Alphabet

MASTERLIST

Tom Hiddleston version

A = Attractive. What do they find attractive about the other?

Loki loves your laugh. How just the sound of your happiness instantly brightens his day. Body wise, he couldn't choose a favourite (although your eyes and bum are at the top of his list)

B = Baby. Do they want a family? Why/Why not?

Loki doesn't want children. At one point he started to consider raising a family with you and try to be a parent like his mother was, but the cons outweighed the pros.

C = Cuddle. How do they cuddle?

Loki loves you lying on his chest, head resting on his shoulder as his arms firmly wrap around you holding you flush against him. It feels comfortable and the weight of you helps make him feel grounded.

D = Dates. What are dates with them like?

Dates with Loki are very personal. He’ll remember everything you love and would make sure to include that in your dates. Dinners at your favourite restaurants, long walks in your favourite areas, just anything you love.

E = Everything. You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)

You are the light of my life.

F = Feelings. When did they know they were falling in love?

A month or two into your relationship, you walked in Loki’s room late at night saying how you were reading a new book, got to massive plot twist and just needed someone to talk to about it. Loki sat back and watched as you passionately spoke and realised then just how perfect his life would be with you in it forever.

G = Gentle. Are they gentle? If so, how?

Loki can be gentle. When you’re out together he’ll hold your hand gently or when you’re cuddling he’ll gently caress an exposed part of your skin. But when he’s jealous or in a bad mood, he’ll hold onto you for dear life - sometimes accidently leaving a bruise or two. (And would apologise profusely after.)

H = Holding Hands. How do they like to hold hands?

Fingers interlocked together.

I = Impression. First impression/s?

His first impression was that you were just simply another princess. Raised just to be a wife and do as the husband orders. But once he got to know you a little more, he realised just how wrong he was.

J- Joker. Are they into pulling pranks?

Not so much on you (although he still does sometimes) but as the God of mischief, he loves to play pranks on the people in his kingdom. Usually to show off for you or to make you laugh.

K = Kiss. How do they kiss?

Gently, eventually getting more dominating. Hands would start on your face and slowly end up on your hips.

L = Love. Who says ‘I love you’ first?

You did. Not that Loki didn’t want too for a long time beforehand, but he just never mustered up the courage. You said it four months into your relationship. Once you said it, Loki repeated it immediately afterwards.

M = Memory. What’s their favourite memory together?

Your first kiss. You were stood on a balcony watching the stars, holding each others hands. Loki couldn’t stop staring at you and you him. Eventually, you both leaned forward and brushed lips. Its one of his favourites because that’s when he truly started to realise you feel the same for him as he does for you.

N = Nickel. Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?

Oh my God does he spoil you. Even when you tell him he doesn’t need to buy everything you set your eyes on, he still does. Nothing makes him happier than spoiling you rotten.

O = Orange. What colour reminds them of their other half?

Purple. When you first met at the Grand Ball on Asgard, you wore a stunning purple ball gown with a gold Cape and golden jewellery. The colour complimented your natural beauty and now every time Loki sees anything purple, all he thinks is the first time you met.

P = Petnames. What petnames do they use?

“Queen.” Mostly. But also uses “Darling.” and “My love.”.

Q = Quaint. What is their favourite non-modern thing?

Horse riding. Out on his horse, wind through his hair just feeling utterly free.

R = Rainy Day

Curled up with you in front of a fire. Having conversations about anything, sometimes reading to each other. He would often bring food and you two would just relax, basking in the warmth of the fire and listening to rain banging against the windows.

S = Sad. How do they cheer themselves/others up?

To cheer Loki up, all you really have to do is be there. Hold him tightly, keep reassuring him everything will be ok as you run your fingers through his hair. His head on your chest as he listens to your heart beat. It would ground him and help him calm before talking to you about whatever happened.

T = Talking. What do they like to talk about?

Loki likes to talk to you about anything but battles. He doesn’t like how worried you get about him going off. Although he does love talking about your life, all the adventures you had before you met him. All the realms you travelled to and the people you met.

U = Unencumbered. What helps them relax?

Your voice. If he’s stressed out or worrying about anything, Loki would ask you to tell him tales of your past or to read him some poetry. Cuddling in some way as he tries to keep his eyes open - your beautiful voice relaxing him so much he’s falling asleep.

V = Vaunt. What do they like to show off? What are they proud of?

His magic. He will always show off his magic no matter how long you've been married. Hell, you guys could be be having a normal chat and all of a sudden he's pulling stuff from thin air just to show you he can.

W = Wedding. When, how, where do they propose?

Loki proposed in your shared bedroom. He wasn't planning in doing it that way, but the moment felt right. He had returned from war only a few hours prior and after spending some time in bed and talking to you about everything that has happened, he realised you're the only person he would wish to ever come home too. He decided then to stop waiting and just ask.

X = Xylophone. What’s their song?

Can’t help falling in love - Elvis Presley.

Y = You. You are the ___ to my ___ (e.g. the cookies to my milk, the macaroni to my cheese)

“You are the beat to my heart.”

Z = Zebra. If they wanted a pet, what would they get?

Hell have a couple horses and you would own some too, but that would be it.

#loki #loki imagine #imagine loki #loki alphabet #loki fluff #loki x reader #reader x loki #fluff alphabet #loki fluff alphabet #bored-mumma #fluff #headcanon #loki headcanon

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tuanyiems · 4 years

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Ice Choco

Yugyeom x Reader (f) fluff x smut words: 4k plot: you’re nervous about spending the holidays with his parents, but you should be more nervous about the boy who can’t seem to take his hands off of you, established relationship!au christmas!au warnings – fingering, teasing, slow sex, unprotected sex, creampie, this one’s extra fluffy I think, it’s Christmas after all :’) a/n – Christmas came early hehe enjoy! part of Le Chocolatier drabble series, which you can find the masterlist for in my blog. feel free to read this as a one-shot or part of the series, in any order you want <3

You smile fondly at the twinkling fir tree, golden lights and sparkling red bulbs drape over its forest green body. Chocolate squares wrapped in silver foil that you and Yugyeom had hand wrapped yourselves hang on red ribbons throughout the tree. You pluck one off and pop it into your mouth. The peppermint chocolate melts on your tongue, coating your mouth in sweetness.

When Yugyeom first invited you to join his family for the holidays, you were anxious. It hadn’t even been three months since you started dating. You wondered if you were moving too fast. Would his family judge you? Would Yugyeom realize how awkward of a person you were? Would you be left sad and alone on your favorite holiday?

It was only after plenty of reassurance from Yugyeom that you decided to just go for it. You liked Yugyeom, a lot, and despite the short time you’ve been dating, every day has been full of happiness. And if his family was anything like Yugyeom, you would probably like them too.

And that’s how you found yourself here, in the Kim’s living room on Christmas Eve. Unlike what you had imagined, his parents welcomed you with open arms. You learned exactly where Yugyeom got his warmth and kindness.

And as if this moment couldn’t be more picturesque, a full moon hung in the night sky like a shining ornament.

“Pretty,” Mrs. Kim interjected, stepping beside you.

“It is,” you smile, looking out the window.

“No, I was talking about you dear,” she grins, squeezing your arm.

“O-oh,” you stutter, feeling your cheeks heat.

Laughing, Mrs. Kim tilts her head back the same way Yugyeom laughs when he’s teasing you. “Aren’t you a cutie! Yugyeom did good finding you.”

“T-thanks,” you sputter, not sure what to do with yourself. You fix at the red plaid pajamas the Kim’s gifted you with this morning. “I’m glad you invited me…or, well, I don’t know if you invited me. I don’t know if you knew about me. Maybe Yugyeom just brought me without notice. Oh, I hope he didn’t-”

Giggling, Mrs. Kim pulls you into a side hug.

“Sorry,” you apologize, taking a deep breath. “What I mean is, you’ve been so nice. I’m happy to spend the holidays with you and your whole family. Really, thank you.”

“Not at all,” Mrs. Kim scrunches her nose, smiling. “It’s nice to have another woman in the house. Tomorrow, my daughter-in-law will be joining us too!”

“I can’t wait to meet her and your eldest son!” You agree, “I’ve heard so many great things from Yugyeom.”

She nods, giving your arm another squeeze. “Yeah, Yugyeom dotes on his brother so much. But until then, you can use Euigyeom’s old bedroom. I’ve prepared fresh sheets so you can get a good night’s sleep.”

“Fresh sheets won’t feel as cozy as my bedsheets though,” Yugyeom interrupts, coming up beside his mother.

Your eyes widen at his comment.

Mrs. Kim frowns, slapping Yugyeom on the arm. “No babies until you two get married!”

Yugyeom laughs at his mom and when he sees your mortified face, laughs even harder. You aren’t even sure which part of her sentence to be more flustered about—the fact that his mom just insinuated you two possibly having sex under her roof or that you’ve been dating for less than three months and she was already considering marriage!

Your skin feels like hot lava and you wonder if you might even hive up from embarrassment. That would be a first.

“Oh, I think we broke her,” his mom chuckles.

“Honey,” Mr. Kim interrupts, resting his hands over Mrs. Kim’s shoulders. “Let’s head to bed and let the young one’s talk.”

He sends you a wink before ushering his wife into their bedroom. When you hear their door shut, you let out a sigh, shoulders slumping. Yugyeom chuckles softly beside you, patting you on the back.

“I told you, you had nothing to worry about,” he says. “My parents love you already. I think they love you more than they love me.”

“Impossible!” you scrunch your nose, but your lips curl up anyways. “This afternoon when I was helping your mom in the kitchen, she kept talking about all the awards you won in high school. Class president, co-president of the dance club, winner of the youth dance competition. How come you never talk about dance? What else are you hiding from me?”

Yugyeom’s eyes crinkle into half moon shapes. “I also won first prize in the science fair in primary school,” he grins, winking at you playfully. “Your man made a pretty mean volcano back in the day.”

“Oh wow, a volcano? That beats the boy I dated for his solar system model,” you joke.

He smirks, putting his arm around you, “Definitely an upgrade, babe.”

“Tomorrow, I’ll ask to see the baby photos,” you tease, leaning into his embrace as you poke his chest.

Yugyeom tilts his head cockily to the side. “Not to brag, but I was a pretty cute baby. Just a warning, but you might fall in love with me.”

You roll your eyes. A little too late for that, you think to yourself, but that is a confession for another day.

“We should probably clean up and head to bed soon,” you smile, pulling away.

“Don’t wanna see Santa?” he teases.

You chuckle, clearing the living room of the abandoned mugs and plates with the exception of one plate of chocolate chip cookies. “I think it’s cute that your mom still keeps out cookies.”

He smiles, helping you empty the dishes into the sink. “Back when we were kids, they’d wake up at midnight and eat the cookies too.”

Lips jutting out, you stare at Yugyeom with big doe eyes, completely endeared. He glances at you before chuckling and slipping on the bright pink dishwashing gloves.

“On the downside, I got bullied for being the only kid in the neighborhood who still believed in Santa,” he adds.

“Aww, poor baby,” you coo, brushing the stray hair out of his eyes. “Tell me their names, I’ll go beat them up for you.”

“Bambam,” he quips making you laugh.

“Sorry, Gyeom, you’re on your own.”

He chuckles. “S’alright, I had my mom fight that battle.”

You let out a deep breath, leaning your elbows on the center island of the kitchen and admire Yugyeom from behind. He’s only in a plain grey t-shirt and matching red plaid pajama pants, and yet, he still looks handsome. Your eyes travel across his broad back. There is the faint hint of his tattoo underneath the thin cotton material.

When you first saw Yugyeom’s back tattoo, you were surprised but also found it very fitting. Black ink bled wings across his shoulder blades. In a way, Yugyeom came into your life like an angel. Your guardian angel, he liked to joke, saving others from your clumsiness.

You scoff at the memory, making Yugyeom turn to you with narrowed eyes.

“What are you snickering about back there?”

“Nothing!” you squeak, pursing your lips together like a child caught red handed.

He looks at you for a moment longer before turning back to the dishes, smiling to himself.

“I was just thinking,” you finally add after a pause. “I really enjoy the relationship you have with your parents.”

You watch his shoulders lift and you imagine he’s smiling. “Yeah, they’re my best friends,” he tells you over the sound of the running faucet.

“I’m jealous,” you confess softly. You assume he doesn’t hear you.

Unlike Yugyeom, you grew up in a strict household. The only memories you have of your biological father were all associated with fear and while you got along with your mother, you weren’t exactly close either. Of course, the two of you loved each other as most families did, but after experiencing a marriage of struggle, as soon as you were of legal age, your mom went off to chase her own freedom. Back in your late teens, this had put a strain in your relationship, but now that you are older, with your perspective matured, you grew to understand your mom and you’re glad that she’s found a happier life of her own.

Now, the two of you can talk openly about the ups and downs of adulthood and womanhood and everything in between.

But this was why you weren’t spending the holidays with your own family. The two of you had decided a few years back that New Year’s would be for family, Christmas is for love and adventure.

You watch as your love and adventure turns off the faucet and shakes the pink gloves off his arms. “Done!” he declares triumphantly, turning to you now.

“Looks like you’re going to make the nice list this year,” you compliment, wrapping your arms around his neck.

He grins down at you, “How about you sneak into my room and we can both make the naughty list.”

Your eyes widen, feeling your cheeks flush at the thought. Yugyeom laughs, throwing his head back.

“I’m just kidding, don’t have a heart attack!”

Slapping his chest, you pout. “Let’s go to sleep. I’m going to need the energy to deal with you tomorrow.”

But when your head finally sinks into the fresh sheets Mrs. Kim had prepared for you, sleep never comes. After washing up and saying goodnight to Yugyeom, it was like all the exhaustion washed away too. You are wide awake when the clock hits midnight.

It’s probably because you’re in a new environment. It’s been a while since you last slept in a stranger’s bed. You haven’t even slept at Yugyeom’s place yet! You always go home before it gets too late, or it’s him staying at yours.

Anyways, the nerves of meeting Yugyeom’s family along with the new environment and the thrill of Christmas combined is probably what’s keeping you up.

Sitting up in bed, you decide to fix up a warm drink. That should calm you, right?

Slipping out of bed, you sneak out of your bedroom on tiptoes, twisting the doorknob so slowly one might think you’ve been frozen. One thing about the Kim’s house is how eerily quiet the whole place is. Unlike your apartment where everything seemed to buzz—the fridge, the walls, the ceiling, you name it—this house was cloaked in silence.

It feels like an eternity when you finally get the door open big enough to walk through. Looking both ways in the dark hallway, you make a turn and tiptoe your way into the kitchen. Once in the kitchen, you flick the island lights on, casting a dim spotlight at the center of the room. You squint, eyes adjusting to the lights before making your way towards the cabinets.

Helping Mrs. Kim with dinner this evening had paid off. You were already familiar with the kitchen setup.

Plucking a hot chocolate packet between two fingers, you swivel back to the island to boil the water. Pouring the brown powder into a mug, you let out a breath, waiting for the water to boil.

In the open window across from you, you are delighted to find a flurry of white illuminated by the dim light of a single lamppost. The snowflakes fall in fat clumps, as if in slow motion. The quiet realization that you will have a white Christmas after all, brings a soft smile to your lips.

“Hello, Santa,” a sudden voice breaks the silence, making you jump up in a silent shriek.

Standing in the shadows, at the doorway of the kitchen is a very amused Yugyeom, his hands clasped around his mouth to muffle his laughter.

“You scared me!” you whisper yell, one hand on your beating chest.

“Sorry,” he apologizes, not at all sorry, as he walks to your side behind the island. “What are you doing up anyways?”

“Making hot chocolate,” you explain, hands coming to fix at his bed head. “I couldn’t fall asleep. Want one?”

You’re already grabbing another packet from the cabinet before he can answer you.

“I can make you an ice choco,” you smile up at him, eyes forming crescents. They look shinier under the lights. He feels a flutter in his stomach.

Smiling quietly, Yugyeom nods. For a moment, the two of you stand in easy silence. Only the sound of the water boiler can be heard. Yugyeom’s eyes follow where yours are staring and his heart warms. You look so happy, it’s endearing. You must be the only person in this city who hasn’t been jaded from the snowstorms that hit every winter.

Coming from behind, Yugyeom wraps you in his arms, bending to rest his chin in the crook of your shoulder.

“Merry Christmas,” he whispers into your ear, gazing out at the falling snow.

“Merry Christmas,” you reply, turning, you hold his face in one palm and press a kiss to his cheek. He squeezes you tighter in his arms.

When the water boiler clicks off, water now hot and bubbling, you move to grab it but Yugyeom holds you tight, pulling you closer to his chest. You giggle softly, tilting your head at him curiously. He answers you with cold fingers sliding underneath your shirt. It sends you shivering all over.

“Yugyeom!” you squeak in surprise, making futile attempts to escape his grasp.

“I know something else we could do to get you sleepy,” he whispers, breath on the shell of your ear.

“Y-your parents are right down the hall!” you stutter, gulping back the whimper that threatens to escape your throat.

Yugyeom licks a stripe up the shell of your ear, “And sleeping.” You can feel his smirk against your ear.

“I-w-we can’t,” you whine, unconvincingly.

“But you want to,” he says matter-of-factly, hands sliding up your skin. You feel him inhale when his palms come around the supple flesh of your breasts. “No bra? You naughty girl.”

Your protests catch in your throat when he begins to knead at your breasts, rolling both nipples between his thumbs. You whimper, head falling back onto his shoulder at the sensation. His fingers brush against the sensitive buds gently, barely there. It makes your knees weak and your core throb with want.

Yugyeom presses himself into your back and you can feel him hard against you. “You don’t know how hard it was for me to control myself today. Do you know how many hard ons I had to hide from my parents?”

You break into a smile, grinding your ass harder into him. “Is that why you were hugging that throw pillow all day?”

“Don’t you dare laugh at me,” Yugyeom warns, pinching you between his thumbs. “I saw the way you were looking at me. I can read you like a book, baby. Bet you’re already wet.”

Yugyeom presses a kiss to your jawline before sucking down your throat. Your breath skips at the fluttering feeling. “G-gyeom, I-I can’t have hickeys.”

He groans softly against you, biting softly at your jugular before letting go. “You don’t get to call the shots, babe.”

The sternness of his voice makes you whimper, which he catches easily with his own lips on yours. Yugyeom kisses you roughly, tongue overpowering yours just the way you like it. When his hand dips down past the waistband of your pajama pants and panties at once, your eyes fall shut, relishing the sudden intrusion.

“Fucking wet,” he smirks, dipping two fingers between your folds. He gathers your slick, spreading it in circles around your sensitive bud. You whimper, knees going weak.

All too soon though, his hand leaves you, making you whine. He holds his fingers up in the light, admiring the glistening web of arousal. As if practiced, you open your mouth for him and he slides his fingers into your mouth. You whimper at the tang of yourself melting on your tongue.

“Tell me you want me,” he mutters, lids heavy as he slides his fingers in and out of your mouth. You run your tongue around his fingers expertly until you’ve licked him clean.

Yugyeom swallows, watching you suck on his fingers and imagines you sucking other things of his. The very thought makes him shiver. Reluctantly, he pulls his fingers out of your mouth, letting you speak.

“Please Gyeom,” you whine, breathless. “I want you. Need you inside me already.”

It’s music to his ears and he wants to tease you more, but his patience has already run out. Having spent the better half of this day sporting blue balls, Yugyeom just wants to fuck you senseless.

It catches you by surprise when he slips his thumbs down your waistbands and pulls, leaving your ass bare behind the kitchen island. Before you can even feel embarrassed about the sudden exposure, Yugyeom’s finger are back on you, making you whimper while his other hand makes quick work with his own pants and boxers. His cock springs free, red and throbbing.

“You look so delicious like this,” he whispers into your ear, hands squeezing your ass. Oh, how he would have loved to slap your ass until you were red with his fingerprints. Biting his lips, he pushes his dick between your thighs instead.

“Ooh,” you let out a satisfied sigh, your clit rubbing along the length of his cock. Your thighs are soft and warm around his length, it’s unfair, Yugyeom thinks. Your pussy is weeping with desperation, the arousal drips down, coating his dick so that each time he thrusts between your legs, it is deliciously smooth. Everything about your body is heavenly, like it was made for him.

Already, you’re panting, a thick whine straining in your throat. His hot cock rutting between your thighs just teases at your sensitive bud. Your pussy lips clench around nothing and only succeeds in making the ache in your core more despairing.

“Gyeom, please,” you breathe out, hands coming up to run through his hair, your fingers thread around his black strands, before pulling into your fists. Yugyeom enjoys the ache in his scalp.

When he pulls his cock away, you almost yell out loud, lips pouting from the lost sensation. He answers you with a smirk, nudging his foot between yours, he forces your legs apart. Your hands grip at the counter for support, fingers pressing down hard when he slides two fingers into you without warning.

Immediately, you bite at your bottom lip, fighting the moan that threatens to escape you as he dips his fingers into you over and over, stretching at your velvety walls. His fingers are long and practiced, finding the rough, spongy patch inside you quickly.

Your eyes squeeze shut, the ghost of a whimper panting from your lips as he curls his fingers, sending shivers straight to your core. Over and over, he does this, until you’re tightening around his digits. All too soon, your knees are buckling, mind going numb from the sensation.

And then, he pulls out of you.

You gasp, eyes opening wide while Yugyeom chuckles darkly.

Before you can complain, he kisses your temple sweetly. “Not yet, baby,” he whispers soothingly.

You feel Yugyeom stepping closer between your legs and then the head of his cock teases at your entrance, sliding up and down your folds, spreading your slick on him.

You’re about to whine for him to stop teasing when you hear the creak of a door opening. Eyes widening, your heart jumps to your throat when the sound of footsteps shuffling against the floors, echoes like a blaring drum from down the dark hallway.

Your breath hitches when Yugyeom sinks his cock into you slowly. Your palm flies to your mouth, just as he slides all the way in, balls pressed to your ass. He leans into you so that his chest is hard-pressed against your back. You can feel his breath on your skin as his lips press against the nape of your neck.

The door of the bathroom opens and closes.

“Shh,” he mumbles against you, slowly pulling out of you. The friction is so delicious, you can’t help the whimper that muffles against your palm. “Wouldn’t want to get caught with my dick inside you…would you?”

He fucks into you, one hand coming to your throat at the sound of your muffled moan. He squeezes at your throat, softly at first. When he feels the way you clench around his cock, he bites into your shoulder, hiding his groan.

“Are you gonna be a good girl?” he whispers into your ear, fingers tapping at your throat. You nod your head eagerly, rutting yourself onto his dick.

He bites at his lip, squeezing around your neck. At the sound of the water faucet running, Yugyeom ruts into you hard, his free hand coming to rub circles around your clit. You pant, breath constricting and eyes rolling. You love the way he fills you entirely. His slow thrusts hit you deep every time, keeping you at the edge of euphoria.

When the bathroom door opens, Yugyeom’s fingers rub at your bud even faster, sending your heart facing and electric currents straight to your core. You’re so close, it hurts. Tears brim at the corner of your eyes, your voice threatening to break as your ears strain to hear the footsteps coming closer.

You can feel your vein pulsing against your forehead as Yugyeom continues to thrust his cock into your sopping hole, sliding deep into your cunt.

The door of his parents’ bedroom squeaks like slow motion. Please, please go back to bed. Shut the door. All you can hear is your heart pounding in your own ear and Yugyeom’s stifled breathing.

And then you hear the click.

Yugyeom lets go of your throat to hold the edge of the counter instead and the air that invades your lungs while he fucks into you hard send you off the edge.

“Mmmmm,” a strained moan escapes your throat as you collapse onto the island, body jerking as your orgasm hits you in waves. Yugyeom continues his ministrations on your clit, his own balls straining at the way your pussy pulses around him, impossibly tight.

“That’s it, baby,” he soothes, rocking himself into you as you slowly come down from your high. He caresses your throat lovingly, placing soft kisses to your jawline until he’s spilling into you with a quiet groan.

You shiver, his moan tickling the shell of your ear as your pussy pulsed around his cock, sucking up each hot spurt of cum that shot into you.

“God,” he sighs, sweaty forehead pressing into your shoulder. He all but collapses on you. “I love you so much.”

Both you and Yugyeom freeze. His softened cock slips out of you and he rushes to help clean the cum that drips out of your pussy. Stumbling, Yugyeom haphazardly pulls the band of his pants back up while grabbing a towel from behind him.

You barely even notice the stickiness that drips down your thigh as Yugyeom wipes the damp towel across your skin. Instead, you stare down at his fluffy hair, a smile stretching across your face.

“Gyeom,” you say softly as he fixes your pants back up, still refusing to look at you. Your fingers thread through his hair softly, “Gyeom.”

When he tilts his head up, he looks so worried. You feel your heart squeeze.

“Gyeom,” you smile softly, helping him back up to his feet. “I love you too.”

He blinks like he’s heard you wrong. “You love me too?”

You nod, giggling now. “I do. A lot.”

Yugyeom pulls you into a kiss.

“You love me!” he repeats against your lips and then he is kissing you again until you are both giggling against each other.

#got7 scenarios #got7 reactions #got7 imagines #kim yugyeom #got7 smut #fluff #christmas au #holiday au #fanfic #writing #got7 series #le chocolatier series

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ramuoto · 4 years

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TOP 10 MANHWAs

if anything good came out of 2020, it’s my discovery of manhwas.

well, it’s not like i’ve never read a single manhwa in the past 15+ years but tbh, the ratio of manhwa:manga i consume on a weekly basis has jumped exponentially this year. previously it was like 1:99 and now it’s like 90:10 LMAO.

so, just to remind myself that the world is still full of good things, i had to make this list. which i will probably edit in the future, if i can be bothered to. :)

anyhow, this list was not made in any particular order, just whichever came into mind. it’s loooong so be prepared! (I’ve read way more titles than mentioned but just included the ones worth checking out)

for whoever stumbles across this list, i hope some of these resonate with you and i hope they make you as happy as they made me.

pic credits: https://geekculture.co/geeks-guide-to-transmigration-novels-avoid-death-at-all-costs/

1. Ebony

https://mangadex.org/title/41838/ebony

Bahahah omg he looks evil there! But our dearest archduke is hardly that aww. Soz, I just ripped off the covers of the manhwa cos I can’t find a panel I liked more than another. I mean, this manhwa is a GEM. I can’t even begin to describe this because everything about it blew me away. This is not something you read when you are craving for fluff, or just wanna have something brainless after a hard day at work or if you just wanna have some eye candy lol. This is something you pick up on a weekend, when you have time, because you need those hours to digest, appreciate, clutch your chest, tear a little because you find yourself falling in love with these characters. It doesn’t have any of that cliche isekai, romance, revenge themes going on. It has a solid plot, backed by incredible characters, beautifully woven by the authors and artist with incredible pacing that keeps you on your toes and keeps you looking forward to the next chapter. Maybe I would have been happier if I found it after it was completed lol. HAVE I CONVINCED YOU ENOUGH TO MAKE YOU WANNA READ IT?! like, idk, just go. JUST GO READ IT GDI.

p.s. it says there romance but naaaaaaah, dont go in with that expectation. :) this story is so much more than that.

2. Bring the love

https://mangadex.org/title/44472/bring-the-love

This...this!!! THIS MANHWA NEEDS MORE LOVE. If you need a lot of fluff, a little, ok maybe quite a bit of sadness and tragedy, sweet sweet romance, cutie pies, please, look no further!!! Again, pacing, character development are so important to me and this manhwa aces it. I love the 2 MCs very much. And the side characters too. :)

3. A Stepmother's Märchen

https://mangadex.org/title/39474/a-stepmother-s-m-rchen

When I first read this, i fucking cried. like please don’t ask me why. it’s not like its an absolute tragedy but I was just rooting for the MC so much and I really want for everything to go her way. That’s how much I adore this MC!!! I LOVE HER. I LOVE HER MORE THAN YOU DO NORA! HAHAHHA. okay soz. I need to keep this spoiler-free.

Anyhoo, there is nothing typical about this time travel plot. Sure, she goes back to try to undo the stuff that went wrong but phew, she certainly changed things so much everything that comes her way have made it so her previous experiences can hardly help aaaaaaand that’s what makes it fun! I sometimes wish the pacing could be a little more consistent, and there could be more characters I could love a little more wholeheartedly (so i wont have to be in so much despair when i read this sometimes lol) but omg the art, isn’t it pretty?! I’ve re-read this soooooo many times but the art blows me away all the time. And have I already mentioned how much I love her?! I LOVE YOU SHULI! AND I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY!

4. Lady Baby

https://mangadex.org/title/34691/lady-baby

I literally LOL-ed when I saw this cover. WHO THE HELL ARE THEY. WHAT LADY BABY?! ehehehe. okay anyway, uhm, this is already incredibly popular. im not sure if i need to elaborate but yes, it’s adorbs!!! i dont think i like the MC as much as i love her family lol. and everyone else who adores her. im looking forward to when they get older. :) actually not really. please stay cute for as long as yall can! but yeah, i do wish the plot can move a lil faster. i want to see more character development in the other kids too COME ON!

5. Death Is the Only Ending for the Villainess

https://mangadex.org/title/47754/death-is-the-only-ending-for-the-villainess

am i allowed to reveal how shallow i am rn? like the previous choices were all like ‘wow-deep-plot’, ‘wow-character-development’ and this one i just included cos of AESTHETICS ALONE?! the novel covers are breathtaking!!! the manhwa art is amazing as well. and the harem is great! LOL. as for plot... uhm... it’s alright. it’s pretty engaging and i quite like the MC, she’s smart and independent and i love how she views them all antagonistically at all times HAHAHHA. her past is kinda... weird though and i do wish they’d stop referencing it. cos... girl why do you wanna go back to reality!!! stay here! it’s way more exciting!

i love the whole isekai/reincarnate/transmigration theme and this is honestly one of the better, not-so-cliche or cheesy ones HA.

6. Beware of the Villainess!

https://mangadex.org/title/47286/beware-of-the-villainess

do you already see the whole villainess theme?! am i suppose to start feeling embarrassed about my choices?! NO! cos this one is AWESOME!

again, another wildly popular title. for good reasons. it’s hilarious, our MC is as real and candid as it gets and LOOK AT THAT BLUE HAIRED BEAUTY. DO YOU SEE HIM?! IMPLANT HIM INTO YOUR MEMORY NOW!

it’s highly entertaining and breaks all isekai-reincarnation-villainess plot stereotypes. definitely one of the titles i look forward to every week.

7. Who Made Me a Princess

https://mangadex.org/title/32506/who-made-me-a-princess

what? why did i choose this?

BECAUSE OF CLAUDE OF COURSE. ahahaha. okay aside from the amaaaaaaazing art and the beautiful people, the plot is not too bad. a little extreme at times but it’s interesting enough to keep me going. it’s currently on hiatus though and i was highly annoyed by how the first season ended. (YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED? NOTHING.)

i hope the plot can move faster in the next season! and that our dearest MC athanasia can you know, finally be a little more useful... like omg just tell lucas already!!! and tbh girl, no matter which guy you choose, i approve. :D

8. The Flower That Was Bloomed by a Cloud

https://mangadex.org/title/37648/the-flower-that-was-bloomed-by-a-cloud

i featured this before, mostly out of frustration HAHAHA. do you see why i chose this cover?! yeah, i support this (unpopular) pairing okay! the other one is doomed!!! no matter what the author is trying to do now!! I DONT SUPPORT IT!!! lol.

anyway, i had to feature this cos the art is unique! and the story is great. :) and i looooooove listening to the ost while i read it. it starts out kinda slow but as the pace picks up, you won’t be able to stop. and you find yourself conflicted at various points. it did win an award for a reason.

no matter what, i still think dowun is best for her okay. it’s dowun or nothing. he’s devoted to her, we all know that! he just needs to ditch that annoying female guard!!! ok yknw what, maybe nothing is better. :/ *cries*

9. Solo Leveling

https://mangadex.org/title/31477/solo-leveling

why do i even bother? this manhwa is popular enough.

the art is great. the MC is great. i use him and his gang as my wallpaper.

im just not sure i like how this season’s plot is progressing. :/ but i guess it brings us nearer to solving the mystery in the first leg of the manhwa. i just enjoyed the whole part of him leveling up and now that he isn’t really leveling up anymore... idk. am i hoping for more plot shit like bleach (oh wow now u quincy?)... idk man. anywho, no regrets starting on this series and marathon-ing it to death.

cross fingers the plot picks up and doesnt get too complicated for its own good.

10. The Reason Why Raeliana Ended Up at the Duke's Mansion

https://mangadex.org/title/31606/the-reason-why-raeliana-ended-up-at-the-duke-s-mansion

okay, tbh, by the time i reached 10, i still have like 15 other series i was considering LMAO. i even considered lengthening this top 10 to top 15. but that would just be more of me and my nonsense. so... why did i choose this?

COS I LOVE THE 2 MCs!!! they’re adorable. the plot is again, kinda far-fetched at times (i literally laugh my head off at some parts) but it’s isekai-reincarnation okay! anything is possible in whatever magical crap country you end up in! lol. and i like how straightforward it is... in the sense there’s no 2nd lead. like okay i mean they are there but we all know they have no chance. oops. sorry!

and cos i can’t give up on the other titles i have, imma just list them down, without pictures... cos im tired. HA.

11. Doctor Elise

https://mangadex.org/title/29474/doctor-elise

Kudos to the huge improvement in art style lmao. The good... lovable MCs, engaging plot. The bad... sometimes lengthy, incredulous medical moments (i work in the medical field so i... idk. sometimes this borders on iryu LMAO and i need to remind myself this is romance) otherwise, this is a highly highly entertaining read.

12. Seduce the Villain's Father

https://mangadex.org/title/46775/seduce-the-villain-s-father

This is another of my ‘father-love’ whims. MC is adorable and ML is handsome. enough said.

13. The Villainess Lives Twice

https://mangadex.org/title/49644/the-villainess-lives-twice

This is like a lesser version of Ebony and Bring the Love combined HAHAHA. The plot and premise is great and it’s awesome to marathon! I don’t find myself loving the MC as much as I should but the ML is a darling! I just find her a little toooooooo gloomy. Like come on girl, be more spunky!

14. The Stereotypical Life of a Reincarnated Lady

https://mangadex.org/title/46790/the-stereotypical-life-of-a-reincarnated-lady

I dont know why I like this so much HAHAHAHA. It hardly has a plot. I just find the MC and ML amusing i guess lol.

15. I'm Stanning the Prince

https://mangadex.org/title/45586/i-m-stanning-the-prince

Sometimes I wonder if I should be ranking this higher but I kinda feel this manhwa is trying to achieve too much with an underpowered MC. I love her... but I just don’t like how she’s just a pawn of everyone else and I dont know how she can change this situation of hers. It’s cute though. the MC and ML. and the ML reminds me so much of american/jap Mackenyu.

16. The Villainess Reverses the Hourglass

I HAD TO. the art is so pretty! but girl, dont use the hour glass so much! you look a little too old! i would appreciate it if MC stops basing too much of her moves on the “past” tho like idk you are gonna sound unoriginal soooooon like develop your own thoughts soon okay? <3

17. Inso's Law

ANOTHER ONE. omg. im a lil on the fence regarding this but i like MC too much. and her harem LOL. i dont see where the plot is going either but i just hope for a happy end... ):

18. Why Are You Doing This, Duke?

HAHAHA. this is sooooo sooooooo cute, i would have ranked it top 15 if it wasnt licensed by tapas tho cos they are a joke. WHY NOT TAPPY GDI.

19. Miss Not-So Sidekick

Uh-oh. Is this a top-20 list now? anyway, the MC for this series is GOLD. im not liking where it’s currently heading tho thus the lower ranking.

20. IRIS - Lady with a Smartphone

omg IVE NEGLECTED THIS FOR TOO LONG. lemme go buy more chapters hahahaha. it’s a tad too lengthy... otherwise i like the MC and yummy ML!

still not enough?

Special Mentions - Okay, these will be unranked cos I don’t think these are that good but probably still worth a read.

I've Become the Villainous Empress of a Novel - this is new, im looking forward to how it progresses wheeeee.

Lady to Queen - It’s a ruthless manhwa. There was a point i started reading all sorts of sadistic content (i was running out of content i swear) and this was one of the better ones. I appreciate the MC very much. the plot now is a little weird and im a bit wary of the MC’s sister... hopefully the ML can be more useful. he’s pitiful though. but dude come on, dont rely on the wrong gal.

Goodbye, In-law - I’m not sure if i like the current progress buuuuuuut MC and ML are cute so who cares.

The Duchess' 50 Tea Recipes - plot is still engaging. MC and ML are cute. i dont know where the plot is heading towards though.

A Falling Cohabitation - this is interesting and fun but a lil lengthy.

Light and Shadow - the sequel is out!!! i highly enjoyed this entire series!!! i would have probably ranked it a lil higher if i did this post earlier but too many series have overtaken this in my heart lol.

This Girl Is a Little Wild - is the hiatus ending yet? i would add it back to top 20 if it came back LOL. it’s highly entertaining tho. ML is adorable.

The Duchess With an Empty Soul - pretty nice. MC and ML are a little boring. i think it can end soon. LMAO.

A Capable Maid - it’s amusing how she gets her powers for all sorts of situations lol. the prince is creepy tbh. and im secretly rooting for the other king hehe.

Beware of the Brothers! - it’s cute and heart-wrenching at the same time! not too sure im digging the latest plot development but okay... i’ll take it. they’re all cuties.

Living as the Tyrant's Older Sister - hehehe. it’s cute. duke is kinda silly but the latest chapter made me squeal!!!

The Evil Lady's Hero - idk where the plot is going but MC and ML are adorable!!!

The Dragon Next Door - HAHAHA. it’s hilarious.

The Youngest Princess - she’s growing uppppp noooooooooooo

Virtues of the Villainess - ginger is hilarious. i dont see where the plot is going tho... and cant say i like the ML yet. i dont even get to see him much, hello?!

The Justice of Villainous Woman - pretty wholesome... i like the MC! (the ML is fine. no one else to contend with so...) can u end already?! lol.

Amina of the Lamp - hey, what happened to this? it’s pretty inconsistent but i do like the MC and ML... and the art...

The Villain's Savior - this is some sadistic shit. i reserve it for when i feel sadistic. i pretty much wanna see MC happy but idk if she’s making the right choices. :/

I Don't Want to Be Empress! - HAHAHAHA uhm it’s getting interesting. i just want ML to step up more...

La dolce vita di Adelaide - I FINISHED THIS! and it’s wholesome, feel-good and cute. some parts felt a lil extra but ah whatever.

The Black Haired Princess - plot. move. faster!!! otherwise the MC and ML are pretty cute.

The Abandoned Empress - im a lil on the fence but i know how popular this series is. it started out HORRIBLE. i hated the ML so much. and then i found the green hair boy creepy. like MC, you need better taste in boys. it’s certainly getting more interesting now though. so please, continue to make my money’s worth!!!

Lucia - i. am. not. guilty. of. anything. *smut warning* anyway go read the novel. it’s better. hehehe.

What's Wrong with Secretary Kim - i do not need to elaborate any further.

Past loves

I created this section just to remind myself, that what i could like one day, i could hate the next LOL.

The Monster Duchess and Contract Princess - I know this is wildly popular. but i lost interest in it once she grew up. i dont think she’s particularly lovable. soz.

Survive as the Hero's Wife - another popular choice. I find the plot kinda boring now. MC and ML are cute though.

Sincerely: I Became a Duke's Maid - another popular one. again, boring plot. like cant it end yet? oh you mean we need to wait for the real female lead to show up? dont need luh.

I Am a Child of This House - wow. the plot is shit now. and i do not support the MC and her guard. soz. she’s OVERPOWERED tbh.

This Is an Obvious Fraudulent Marriage - idk what happened but my enthusiasm for this died.

Charlotte and Her 5 Disciples - i don’t get it. i dont get their obsession for her.

#manhwa #fav manhwa #ebony #bring the love #a stepmother's marchen #lady baby #death is the only ending for the villainess #beware of the villainess #who made me a princess #the flower that was bloomed by a cloud #solo leveling #the reason why raeliana ended up at the duke's mansion

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kurlyfrasier · 4 years

Text

Terrified: Part 9 (final)

Raph x Reader

Synopsis: Raph saves you from ruffians one night in an alley after watching out for you for weeks without you knowing. Which leads you to getting to know the guys and becoming part of the family. But Raph keeps a distance and you don’t understand why.

Word Count: 1364

Warnings: happy, happy, happy!

*A/N: I just realized I made an error....reader has a roommate and I wrote somewhere that reader lost their apartment. Let’s all pretend reader’s friend had no choice but to find a roommate so friend had to kick them out since reader lost their job. (hopefully that all made sense) Please and thank you!

Also, this fic got so outta hand! It was originally supposed to be a one-shot, then it morphed, then it became a black hole, and now...well this is the end! I’m sorry if this feels rushed for any of you, I needed to stop before I ended up killing somebody off and had them haunting the lair lol Granted, that would be a good fic...

PLEASE ENJOY & THANK YOU FOR READING THIS ROLLER COASTER OF A FIC! :D you have all been fantastic.

“Okay,” you chirped, playing with the ends of Raph’s bandana. You sounded happy. Too happy. Especially considering you had looked a little frightened a moment ago.

Raph raised his head to find a toothy grin on your face. He squinted up at you suspiciously.

You noticed and let your face fall like it was minutes ago.

“What?”

He didn’t respond as he thought over everything he had said. What was it that made you smile?

“Ya seem…,” Raph switched tactics. “I expected ya ta argue.”

“About?”

“Gettin’ good sleep-”

“Well, I do feel exhausted. I couldn’t sleep cos I was worried something bad might happen to you,” you explained.

“Eatin’ betta-”

“I promise I will try. But I’m really not hungry. And food hurts,” you pouted.

“Bein’ glued ta my side.”

Silence. Your eyes flitted up to the tv as you pretended not to hear him.

“Y/n,” Raph shook you slightly to get your attention, but you only gave him a quick glance. He stood, bringing you with him as he blocked your view of the tv. “I don’ think ya understand wha’ that entails, Swee’heart.”

“What, what entails?” You muttered quietly, looking down at the floor.

“Stickin’ to my side,” he gently lifted your chin, forcing eye contact.

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” Raph continued to hold your gaze. “It means no video games with Mikey unless I’m there. No science experiments with Donnie unless I’m in the room with ya. No meditating for hours with Leo, cos we both know I don’ do long meditation.”

“What about tea with Splinter?”

“I figure ya can drink tea with Sensei while I take care of personal needs.”

You nodded your understanding. Well, as much as Raph would allow with his finger under your chin.

“And last, but not least; hours upon hours of sittin’ in the dojo while I get back inta fightin’ shape.”

A flash of fear crossed over your features before you could hide it from him. If he hadn’t been boring into your eyes, looking for any tell tale sign of what was really going on in your pretty little head, he would have missed it.

“And ya still not gonna argue ‘bout it, huh?” He continued as the gears turned in his head. Which word, exactly, had you scared?

Then it clicked.

Fighting.

You were afraid of him going topside again.

“Is that what this is all about?” Raph questioned, still not letting go even though his grip tightened a tad.

It all started to make sense.

“What is wha-”

Why you didn’t argue.

“No, Princess,” he seethed. “Tell me you didn’t.”

Why you stopped eating.

“Didn’t wha-”

If you were glued to him.

“Stop eatin’ cos a me,” he growled.

Then he couldn’t go topside.

“Well- I, uh- I- No?” You slammed your eyes closed and a tear rolled down your sunken cheek.

And if he couldn’t go topside.

“Ya put yerself in danger!” He finally ripped his hand out from under your chin as his voice echoed beyond the room.

Then he was stuck in the lair.

“I’m not in dange-” He shook your hand away when you reached for his arm.

Where he couldn’t get hurt.

~~~~~~~~~~~

To say I was scared was an understatement. Terrified didn’t even cover it. Petrified did.

I was petrified.

Raph had figured it out. Somehow. Some way. I could tell the moment it all clicked together. My plan failed. Utterly and completely. It didn’t even last a whole day! How was I supposed to keep him safe now?

“Yes, ya are!” Raph shouted, exasperated.

“No! I’m fine! See?” I sobbed out, motioning to myself as if I hadn’t lost the weight. As if I had been sleeping fine.

“Ya not fine!” He started pacing like earlier, fists clenched. “Ya sick! Ya hurtin’ yerself!” Raph boomed louder than I had ever heard. “Yer killin’ yerself, Y/n,” he choked out, his back facing me as I watched him fall to his knees, head in his hands.

It broke my heart.

I never meant for this.

I never meant to-

“Don’tcha see?” He mumbled through his hands, a tremble to his normally confident voice.

I quickly made my way in front of him to wrap my arms around his neck.

“Yer my life,” he pulled me so close it hurt, soaking my shirt with his silent tears. “Yer everything. I couldn’ live without ya. I couldn’ bear it. There’d be no point in fightin’ if ya weren’ around, Swee’heart.”

“Then what about me?” I sniffled, unable to stop my own tears- happy- sad- frustrated tears- from flowing. “You almost died! If you had-”

“Don’t say it,” he rasped, sqeezing me a little tighter, effectively shutting me up.

“You think I could live without you?” I asked him, lightly pulling on his bandana tails, silently asking him to look at me.

He did. And those glassy eyes tore at my heart once more.

“I know ya can,” he whispered roughly. “Ya don’ need a freak like me in ya life.”

“Yes I do!” I bawled out. “Quite literally, Raph. Those guys would’ve killed me the night we met.”

His gaze hardened at the memory.

“You literally saved my life,” I gave him my most tender smile. “Who else is going to protect me, if not you?”

~~~~~~~~~~

Your words were like music to Raph’s ears. His heart soared at the thought of you even feeling an inkling about him the way he did about you. Vaguely, he knew you felt the same, especially with that spark in your eye and that little smile tugging at your lips. His heart melted at the realization.

“I though-” he cleared his throat before continuing. “I thought I scared ya tha’ night in the alley.”

“What gave you that idea?” You asked gently, rubbing small circles on his shoulder.

“Yer were always so fidgety ‘round me,” he shrugged, trying to hide how much that really hurt all those months.

“That’s because you hardly said a word to me! Not to mention you only looked at me to check for injuries-”

“Ya really think tha’s what I was really doin?” Raph smirked up at your shocked expression.

“Oh…”

~~~~~~~~~~~

Raph had done exactly what he had promised over the next several weeks. He never let you out of his sight. He made sure you slept a good eight hours each night. He cooked and fed you- making doubly sure you didn’t go retch it up.

It was a long, arduous journey to get your appetite back, but you did your best. Every great once in a while you couldn’t help but empty your stomach. Raph stuck with you through it all. Held your hair back, wiped you down with a cool cloth, and made sure you knew it was going to get better- that it just takes time- as he rocked you to sleep.

Most of your time was spent in the dojo as Raph got back into “fighting shape,” just like he said. He even made you train with him once you started eating better. He said it would be good for you. That it was healthy for you- more than just physically. After each session he would assure you that he would be more careful when he got to go topside again. That he would try not to do anything too stupid. You believed him. You really did. But that didn’t mean you worried any less. Plus, you were coming to terms with the fact that he would never stop his vigilante work. You couldn’t blame him, not really. His brothers needed him. The city needed him. It was part of who he was and you wouldn’t change that for the world.

Even if the thought of him going topside did still terrify you deep in your bones.

Needless to say, you were happier than you’ve ever been.You were in the best shape of your life. You got your job back and chose to stay living in the lair with the man of your dreams. When your demons came back to haunt you, your new family chased them away.

You were loved.

You were happy.

And you couldn’t imagine anything better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To those who have an eating disorder,

You are beautiful. You are loved. Please eat! Your friends and family worry about you. They love you, even if they don’t show it well. I worry about you! I love you! Please stop hurting yourself! Please! Fight those demons! YOU ARE STRONG. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE WONDERFUL.

Those people who made you believe you were anything less than what you are, are WRONG. They are jealous and petty and cruel. If people told you what you are doing won’t hurt you- that it’s healthy- they are WRONG. DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. You may not know this, but this disorder- this demon- can KILL you. I, personally, do not want you to die.

Please, I beg of you to listen to that tiny voice in the back of your mind that whispers you will beat this. That you will win. That you are gorgeous. That you will be happy again.

If you can’t hear that voice then listen to your family and friends who are there for you. Who care about you. Who encourage you. Who love you.

If you can’t fight for yourself, then fight for them until you can.

With all my love,

KurlyFrasier

P.S. If you ever need an ear, I’m here. Please, do not be afraid to ask for help. We all have our demons to fight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Want to read more by me? Masterlist

#tmnt #fanfic #raph x reader #tmnt fanfic #raph #leo #donnie #mikey #splinter #FINALLY a happy ending #eating disorder #bulimia #anorexia #sad #angst #happy #struggle #fight #ask for help

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dandyvespa · 4 years

Text

I-Land Final Episode and Thoughts *SPOILERS! duh*

For anyone who has kept up with I-Land, I understand how emotional and nerve-wracking this episode was for them. After developing a connection with a lot of the participants and sharing in their memories, its hard to see anyone being let go. It has been just as much of journey for them as it was for the fans who supported them and at the end of the day, regardless of who debuts, there will be people who will be disappointed by the final results. But please please PLEASE understand that you should not put the blame on them or even break them down just because your favorite did not make it. All of these boys worked hard to get where they are and though it stings for those who did not make it, please support whatever flower path any of them have taken and continue to support and spread love. With that being said, I would just like to use the rest of this post on my final thoughts on the episode and debut line. If you are caught up with the show, please read ahead. Thank you :)

First I would like to say that the preparations done for the final performance, the OT22 interaction and performance, the funny bits of preparing PR videos, dividing roles, and playing Truth or Dare, and the home-cooked meals sent from their parents were all just an emotional roller coaster. I laughed and I cried. To see those boys grow was something very special to me and to see their individual selves shine through personalities or skills were always a treat. Having these segments were really meant to lighten the mood for the final lineup to come. Personally, Sunghoon developed the most out of his shy exterior and his personality was so confident and funny in the pre-recorded videos. I also thought Jay... could never escape his dark history LOL. Also Heeseung’s brother teasing him and telling him to tell Jay he adores him was very cute. Seeing everyone help each other with the PR videos was adorable and heart-warming (Heeseung even had a whole production team haha). Jungwon dressed up as a sheep still sticks with me though haha. Seeing OT22 come together also had me in tears and stitches. It was so cute seeing them all hang out in I-land and despite how whack it was for the Grounders to never experience it, they looked so happy being with their friends and taking part in this little world even if it was for a short time. Also loved how they would easily throw others under the bus during Truth or Dare and the Questions they voted on. The love and support their parents got and how each of them could not hold back their tears was really the icing on the cake. No matter where these boys go, their family will always be their for them more than anything else. Just all those moments leading up to their debut lineup really put a toll on me and it just made me feel like a proud mom

Okay the team name? I am sooooooooooo glad its not Dragon Gee or Dee or whatever that speculated name was going around on Twitter. Enhypen is odd but in a good way. Its different and it will stick with time even though I still may just call them the I-Land group for now lol. Pretty curious about what the fandom name will be too (but honestly I think I would still call myself an Eggie haha).

TXT and BTS’s presence was neat. I wish more of the TXT member’s got to speak but having them all physically there was nice. Though I will say it was just awkward not seeing them cheer as much. I also felt like BTS was just bored at some points or were just glazing over when having to wait on each member getting called out. They did have their humorous moments which was nice to see, definitely lifted the tension in the room and I’m glad they joked a bit (especially Suga losing it lol) instead of remaining completely serious. Their advice and encouragement were all appreciated too. Jhope being an avid viewer really showed. Also plus points for Jungwon getting Jungkook’s attention uwu. I still wish they could have interacted more and mentored some of them over the course of the show. The slim TXT interactions with Heeseung such as Taehyun and Yeonjun’s reactions made me wanting more damn it. But hey, at least we get to see them more often in the BigHit building. I love a good family.

So the Calling performance was A M A Z I N G. I personally thought they were so coherent as a group and made me wishing OT9. There were some who really shine in their parts, but I think all of them stood out one or more times to me. The dance was pretty powerful and a lot of them improved vocally. Again, it makes me feel like a proud mom seeing them all at this point, grown and amazing. The Into the I-Land performance also made me feel that way as well. They all looked so good together and were pretty in sync given that they were fucking 22 of them. The nostalgia was really hitting in me and I also teared uo like a big ass baby. But can I just say... and let’s be real here.... Every single song on this show has been a bop and I would be thrilled to see a whole Soundtrack Album for I-Land on Spotify. Like P L E A S E.

Now onto the debut line! I was S H O C K E D. You can clearly tell these votes were not rigged in the slightest and this was solely based on global votes always shifting which was appreciated. I did not see this order coming and it did turn out slightly different then my post on my preferred I-Land debut line. So starting with number 1.... YANG FUCKING JUNGWON. I was pleasantly surprised and I literally jumped out of my bed when I heard him place first instead of Sunoo. This was the complete definition of people who initially slept on him finally waking. I was soooo thrilled. Bro really came in last by the last Producer vote and then climbed all the way to first. Our lovely sheep garden and hidden ace, a big congrats!

Jay also left his cursed 6th spot and got second! Again another well-deserved man who gave it his all from the beginning and was no stranger to being straightforward and a go getter. His stubbornness and hilarity will lead this group lol.

Jake getting third was a big shock as well. Our icon of improvement! To think he was always on the verge of getting placed out of the top 7 members and made it here? Also considering his benefit put him in 7th once when he literally could have been the eliminated member that episode. UGH. Our Aussie boy did great and seriously improved performance after performance.

Next up.... NIKIIIIIII. Now I’m gonna be real I thought it was gonna be K. I never placed Niki in my debut prediction, but his Flame On performance really change everything for me. Actually, just the whole second part of I-Land was very impactful for him. I was always hesitant about his sportsmanship and whether he was too selfish in the first part (the constant evil-editing did not help, Mnet...), but thanks to other members, he really matured and took a greater lead in things. I really began to fall for him when we got to see him more playful and interactive with other members. Like I really thought he was much happier and understanding throughout the second half of the show. So kudos to him!

Coming in 5th place was Heeseung. I was actually confused man. When he was called first at this point, I just knew this global vote line up will be verrrry different. I was still relieved that he made it and seeing him choke up, this boy who has been going at it the longest among the 9 participants at 3 years to finally debut.... Gosh I could not. As someone who is also Heeseung biased, I was so so so happy for him. Think we all know regardless of which place he got, the boy was destined to debut. My Ace heart feels full ^^. Go get him Leader!!!

Now 6th place... my Ice Prince... Sunghoon! I was actually the most nervous for him. I saw so many people saying that Sunghoon was last in votes or was in danger because a lot of people had the mentality that given his popularity they should reserve the votes for the people who would most likely be eliminated. I think that’s why Heeseung and Sunoo were scored low too. Now I am also biased towards him. I was thinking like what would I do if none of my favorite Bighit trainees (Heeseung, Jay, Sunghoon, and Jungwon) do not make it? But when he was called to take up the last spot in global voting, I did a back flip (not really but yeah lol). Given that Sunghoon has never gotten any brutal feedback from the Producers and has always adapted to each concept, he deserved this. Just everything he has been through... And shifting his life from being an ice skater of 10 years to this path as an idol.... hold up let me get some damn tissues. May he continue to break out of his shell and show his continuous charms!

Ok the producer choice for 7th place... Again did not see that coming. Sunoo constantly ranking high in global votes only to be one of the deciding factors was another big surprise. I have said that Sunoo’s sunshine personality would be needed, especially if the group were to do cute or youthful concepts. His health had been concerning, but he was able to manage himself so well. Even with powerful choreo! He is not really one of the best dancers but he had always been able to do his part. I really thought the Producers would choose K, but I really thought Bang PD boiled it down to overall skill and personality appeal. He even claimed that Sunoo would connect best with the world with his joyful outlook. I honestly could not agree more. I just people do not rail him for being picked as they should now understand he is not just some cute face and has proven that multiple times. Sunshine Fighting! :)

The eliminated trainees were K and Daniel. Though I thought Daniel has improved a lot, he was just outshined. I also think at his age he should have more time spent in sharpening his skills. What was more devastating was K. He looked like he was obliterated. I mean both of them were naturally sad, but K was just gone to me. I was really hoping that he would make the debut line. K has shown himself as a performer multiple times and was praised for his choreography skills. He even showed to have learned from past behaviors and matured more as a person when taking the leader role. To see him grow and understand where he went wrong.... ugh I really could not bear him looking that way. His thoughts were all over the place and he could barely choke out what he wanted to say. I just hope he meant what he said and actually continues to enjoy music and develop himself as a performer. I knew how much his mom was initially livid at the idea of him becoming an idol so I hope he gets another chance at showing her that he can still do this. Now understand this does not mean you should blame Sunoo for being chosen or complain that Sunoo does not deserve it. I already feel like he is gonna be haunted with the grim reminder that he was chosen instead and think that he doesn’t deserve this because he is not as skilled as K. And people are gonna bandwagon hate on him... and again I say please DO NOT DO THAT. At the end of the day, no matter how much you want OT9 or OT22, this is a survival show and these participants signed up for this. Yes there will be fans who are disappointed, but you shouldn’t waste your anger on the other trainees who were able to succeed instead of your faves. I don’t want this moment to completely wreck K or Daniel’s chances at being an idol again. Same goes for rest of the eliminated I-Land members. This is definitely not the end for any of them so please go on with hope guys because I know you will still have many people’s support! They will end up on the same stage as their colleagues one day.

The last thing I want to say is that though this has been a tough journey and though there may be people who will not be satisfied with the debut line, everyone worked hard. From the participants to the fans and even the Producers, all of them played a special role in making I-Land bearable and exciting to watch. This is a big congrats to everyone who took part in the show despite having to go through many hardships. With that being said let us continue to support the futures of the eliminated I-Land members as well as the grand success of Enhypen. I smell 4th gen leaders :D. Welcome to the BigHit family Enhypen and may your fans, your wings, fly you even higher once you officially debut. F I G H T I N G!

Now... will you guys join in during the next season of I-Land for the next global girl group? :3

.... Ya’ll already know I am lol.

#I-land #iland #enhypen #jungwon #jay #jake #niki #heeseung #sunghoon #sunoo #bts #txt #kpop #kpop survival show #kpop thoughts #kpop opinions #bighit #mnet

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unsettledink · 4 years

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A while back I made up a list of fics I had ideas for/wanted to write, mostly to try and drum up bids for Marvel Trumps Hate.

Since then I have, of course, had approximately five million new ideas and keeping track of them has gotten a bit out of hand, so i thought I’d try and put them all in one place that I could come back to and also update more easily. Also possibly some sort of... accountability thing? Like if I put them out into the universe I’m more likely to actually write them? Well I can dream.

There’s going to be a couple of these, divided up by pairings. Feel free to ignore, it’s mostly housekeeping!

(This one’s just for starker and polystarker ideas.)

I’m kind of grouping these because it got long. (Smut, smut + feels, fluff, oh no the sads)

* for new ideas (ARG)

Just the smut! (Ok some feels):

Continuation of Hang Up – so what does happen the next morning after that phone call? (Sex. Probably more phone sex.)

*Pocket Change sequel – Why yes, Peter, you can work out some sort of retroactive deal to 'pay' for the suits...

Peter is dumb online – Peter decides to auction off his virginity online. Of course Tony finds out immediately. Of course Tony buys it to keep Peter from getting hurt. Of course Tony decides to meet up and teach Peter a lesson about being safe – wait. That might have been a mistake. (It’s not.)

Actually, Peter doesn’t like it rough – miscommunication piled on top of miscommunication because they’re both idiots who are desperate for each other, until a tipping point is reached. Happy ending! Fluffy ending!

Gag reflex training – pretty much what it sounds like. Tony having a lot of fun with Peter; messy, noisy, hopefully hot.

Experienced Peter – Peter hasn’t been waiting around for Tony to be the first, and he’s had time to figure out some of his preferences. Like topping almost exclusively, among other things. Hey I kind of wrote this!

Civil War pick me up – after the airport, Tony goes to check on Peter and is in desperate need of something nice. Peter really, really wants to be that something nice. Could be underage, could be not.

Continuation of Gift Wrapped – (Peter/Tony/Pepper) there’s a lot more sex happening for Tony’s birthday than I had time to write for kinktober.

But you want me to be safe, don’t you? - Peter’s hit with sex pollen, but it can be taken care of without outside help. Peter would still really like it if Tony would help. Or would at least keep an eye on him. Or at least stay in hearing range! He won’t be able to resist if Peter’s noisy and saying his name while he gets off, right???

Armor Kink - I mean, basically what it says on the tin. Peter’s been having fantasies about the armor forever. Tony is absolutely willing to help him with that.

ABO forced presentation – Peter doesn’t know what he’ll end up being, and that’s bad for Reasons. He convinces Tony try forcing a presentation (not noncon type forcing) and things get weird. Playing around with the idea of how non-binary might go in ABO. Possible Tony/Peter/Pepper endship. More than likely somewhat underage.

Avengers orgy – Peter’s finally old enough to join in the tradition! While he’s having fun with everyone, Peter and Tony keep gravitating to each other, winding up with things getting a little too emotional when Tony finally gets his chance. Potential for Tony/Peter/Rhodey endship.

The spider bite did what?!? - Peter starts having really weird cravings when he’s around Tony. Weird as in blood, and Tony is going to help him figure this out. Even when it turns into a craving for sex (and bloodplay). Even when it turns into terrifying (for Peter) egg/medical kink.

*Hooker D/S AU Brat!Peter – Tony orders 'the brattiest sub you have' and gets Peter. Who is incredibly so, and Tony is actually delighted by this. And Peter is a little taken aback that someone likes this rather than considering him a bad sub.

*Flaunt follow up – more Peter/Tony/Rhodey D/S AU? Yup!

*No, I'm saving YOU – villains of the week catch them and plan on gangbanging Peter – until Tony offers to be willing if they leave Peter alone. At some point Peter comes around and tries to bargain for them to use him instead of Tony. Tony is not happy about this, but boy, the villains are!

*Peter/Harley/Tony - Tony’s so glad Peter’s over that crush and happy with Harley. Really. Totally. Meanwhile, Peter & Harley are doing their best to get Tony into bed with them and growing increasingly frustrated with Tony’s (intentional) obliviousness.

Smut! Oh wait, where did all these feelings come from?:

Toybox – slightly darker Peter decides if Tony won’t fuck him, the least Tony can do is pay for Peter’s toys, and watch while Peter enjoys them. No touching allowed since Tony doesn’t want him, after all. Which is a rule that gets harder and harder to keep in place; feelings, so many feelings everywhere.

Pain kink Peter – what it says on the tin, lol. “Oh Mr. Stark, maybe you should supervise this slightly dangerous sex thing I like.” I think we can guess where it heads from there.

Baby's first D/S (dom version) – established T/P, Tony's subby but hasn't brought it up. Peter is like, 'but what if I was into the idea of doming?' and they start messing around with it. Peter is Very Earnest and learning all these new things, and Tony is surprised to find, after a while, Peter's doing pretty good on his own.

Call boy Peter – what it sounds like! It’s an accident that Tony gets him; good thing Peter was blindfolded! Bad thing that Peter’s senses are enhanced and he knows from the start who it is. Good thing that Peter’s not going to say anything so he can keep this reliable customer?

Evil Ex D/S verse – Peter’s pretty insecure about being a good sub for Tony and it’s not helped at all when one of Tony’s ex subs tells him he’ll never be able to take what Tony wants to dish out. Well, Peter’s going to prove him wrong! Tony really doesn’t understand why Peter is making himself miserable for something Tony doesn’t even want, and things almost break before they get fixed.

*Besties and Omegas and Peter's – Rhodey and Tony (both omegas) end up in an awkward situation when Peter has something like an enhanced rut around them. Slightly complicated dynamics but happy ending for everyone.

*Outraged owned Peter – some sort of slave type au where Obie buys Peter for Tony as a companion, considering Peter to be a distraction and possible spy. Tony does not want a sex slave and rejects him, and Peter is furious – he is not just for sex, he is literally worth his weight in gold, and how DARE Tony not want him!

*Very dark Peter - Peter’s decided he really likes having Tony completely wrapped around his little finger. To the point of getting Tony to give him/do things that are pretty far from acceptable, and then Peter figures out he likes showing off his hold over Tony even more. Oops.

Fluff! (Crap there’s not much):

Follow up to Seiche – mostly fluffy 5 times +1 where the emotion sensing bond causes (minor) problems

Fluffy D/S verse – all the fluff! All the outside POV! Everyone assumes that obviously Tony is a dom; after all, that’s how he’s always presented himself. Everyone is wroooooong. Tony’s never been happier.

Nail polish – little bit of Tony finding it incredibly appealing when Peter wears nail polish

*Lingerie shorts – several vignettes of them getting each other and wearing different interesting pieces of lingerie

Oh No + all the feelings, heavy on the bad ones:

Soulmark AU – Tony finds out first and isn’t going to do anything due to the age difference. Peter finds out and thinks that’s bullshit + horribly hurt that he’s being rejected. Things are forced when Peter gets hit with a drug that messes with that bond and they both have to figure out how things are going to go. Possible bittersweet ending.

Screw soulmates, actually - Post CW and Tony dealing with soulmate rejection (that’s a WHOLE other fic). Peter’s become convinced Tony’s a blank like him, and then doesn’t understand why Tony’s soulmate wouldn’t want him. Peter does! They get their happy ever after without being fated for each other, and Peter gets a chance to tells Tony’s soulmate what a dick they are. All the satisfaction!

*Blanks are Bad – soulmark au where blanks are regarded extremely poorly, and Tony is exposed as one. Lots of dealing with the ugly fallout, and Peter coming to Tony and confessing he's a blank too and has been so scared.

Untenable – sequel to Indefensible and … horrible. The ABO underage incest continues, Tony hates himself, Peter is distressingly happy. Mpreg makes everything ten times worse; endgame makes everything 100 times worse. Going beyond that would be spoilery, but uh. Everything becomes 1000 times worse by the end! Yay! Yikes.

*Made For It follow ups (aka the... happy version of Indefensible??) - we want to actually see the sex scene they talk about doing, right? Right. And possibly some mpreg? We shall see.

ABO accidental bonding – the worst abo version, heads up. Underage Peter, omegas are treated very poorly, Peter and Tony don’t know each other beforehand and don’t do great getting to know each other afterwards. Biology continues to fuck Peter over, and Tony really doesn’t get how desperately Peter wants Tony to like him. Mountains and mountains of angst and sad before the happy ending.

Copy - After IW, Tony makes a Peter clone/android/whatever. Unfortunately, it just makes things worse because it’s just enough off to make it super obvious it’s not Peter. And fake!Peter knows it too. He’s just enough like real Peter to fall in love with Tony too, and he can’t figure out how to make Tony care about him instead of real, dead Peter. Not that it matters when he snap is reversed (Tony lives) and fake!Peter isn’t needed or wanted anymore. (Will probably have a sequel where real Peter finds out about all this, probably happy ending for everyone.)

Nothing sticks around - years after the blip, Peter discovers Tony, alive - only Tony has none of his memories. Tony doesn’t want anything to do with these people Peter tries to reintroduce him to; he trusts Peter and wants to stay with him. And does, for quite some time, things turning into a relationship, and even if Peter feels guilty about it, he’s happy. Right up until Tony suddenly remembers everything … except what’s been going on the last few years with Peter. Undecided if there’s a happy ending or not.

I hate time travel - once Tony figures out time travel, he decides he needs to find out if this works by hopping forward and seeing if Peter is back. And then maybe he should hop forward a little more just to check on him. Keeps doing this, about once a year, and while Peter is so glad to see him, it’s destroying Peter to basically go through Tony ‘dying’ over and over. Pretty soon it’s fucking up Tony too, after he accidentally shows up when Peter’s in the middle of sex. Very bittersweet ending to maintain the timeline.

Fuck you, Beck - Beck goes about getting the glasses in the worst ways, and Peter finds out a little too late - way too late when it comes to sleeping with him. Not that he’s going to ever tell anyone about that. Not even Tony, when Tony comes back. Not even Tony, when it turns out Tony is interested. Okay, maybe he’ll have to tell Tony when Peter’s reactions to sex become a problem. Happy ending but lots of ouch on the way.

Sequel to Dormant - so what exactly does Tony notice the morning after? And what exactly does Peter do about it? (Spoiler: A lot more than Peter thought he would, and nothing good.)

Don’t punish people like that – as much Tony/Obie as Tony/Peter, maybe pre-Tony/Peter. Obie decided to deal with Tony’s wild streak by punishing him in an especially awful, painful, dehumanizing, sexual way. Tony’s managed to handle how awful that was by pretending it was helpful (nope!). When Peter will not stop misbehaving, the last resort Tony can think of is what was done to him. It helped, right? (He can’t bring himself to in the end, which sets off a cascading failure of repressed trauma, woot!)

*That's rape, Tony – Tony getting drugged, gangbanged, and recorded, and then having part of it released that looks consensual. Tony doesn't remember enough to say it wasn't, and with his history, people don't question it. It goes over very poorly and he's handling all the parts of it very poorly, and Peter is the one to finally put the pieces together.

Sex Pollen Non-Con – Tony’s hit with some sort of fuck or die stuff; only problem is that he 100% refuses to let Peter do anything, and there’s no one else. Peter, convinced that Tony’s going to die, stops giving Tony a choice. What’s that, the trauma Tony was hoping to spare him is replaced with way worse trauma from basically raping Tony? WHOOPS. (Probably happy ending!)

Secondhand verse – following after this, things growing steadily worse, hotter, and more complex between Peter, Beck, and Tony. Bad decisions all around! Unexpected feelings all around! General unhappiness at having feelings that can be hurt all around! Probably a series of fics.

12:00 - follow up to 11:59, Tony and Peter finally getting it on and Beck being an ass in the background. Also the prequel that’s primarily Peter/Quentin, and possibly a sequel where Tony decides that maybe it wasn’t the worst thing in the world, watching Beck fuck Peter - and Peter liked it, right? Everyone’s down for a totally uncomplicated round two, right? Or three, or four...

(And feel free to talk to me about anything here, I love an excuse to ramble. Also, if something grabs your attention, have fun writing it - the more the merrier!)

#starker #pepperstarker #quenterony #ironspiderhusbands #rhodey x tony x peter #(is there a ship name for that???)#idea squad #idea dump #maybe i'll write this someday

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taetaesbaebaepsae · 5 years

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Bury My Love (Final Part)

jooA/n: This is the final part, folks, it’s BIG SAD until it gets happy. It’s been a long road and I love this fic a lot, it’s a little bittersweet to finish it! Also I finally made a banner after the final part :/

Warnings: The softest, saddest smut ever written in my entire life, unprotected sex, big sad, bit angst, but happy ending finally

Word Count: 2265

taglist: @purpletigertaetae, @lvupmushroom, @wannatrymebitch, @jooheonbee, @confusemonkey, @wuggaboo

You’re asleep when your phone rings, and since Namjoon never called, only has your number for emergencies, you rush to answer it.

“Yes?” You answer, and your heart is pounding.

“Hello, Y/n. I’m sorry to call so early…I need your help at the office.”

"N..now? It's not even seven, Joon-"

"I'd consider it a personal favor to me, Y/n."

You swallow hard, blinking sleep from your eyes. Lately it was taking three glasses of wine to get you to be able to sleep and your stomach feels heavy and sick. But Namjoon didn't know any of that, didn't know you were heartbroken and grieving the loss of someone you maybe never even had, and he'd never asked you for anything.

"Okay. Give me half an hour."

You feel like you're going to vomit when you pull up to the building. Maybe a bottle of wine wasn't the best sleep aid.

You realize you must be the first staff at the office, and you're grateful you'd taken the time to put on a little makeup because you feel your face paling when Namjoon's office door is open.

Are you about to get fired? Is that why it was Namjoon who called? For moral support?

It's Jungkook you see first when you walk in, limbs feeling heavy.

"Noona! Thank God you're here." He says, and gives you a big bear hug that makes you smile a little.

Namjoon flashes his dimples at you, too.

Then your eyes fall on the couch, where Yoongi is sitting, shoulders slumped, and your heart seizes in your chest.

"What is this?" You ask, voice cracked.

"It's an intervention," Namjoon says firmly.

Yoongi doesn't speak, doesn't move. The room reeks of alcohol and vomit. Yoongi looks pale and thin and you hate how it makes your throat seize with worry.

"We just want you two to talk," Jungkook says softly.

You take in a deep, slow breath. "Listen, I'm glad that you all think enough of me to ask me to talk, but-"

Yoongi speaks for the first time and his voice is hoarse. "They know."

You swallow, your throat feeling full.

Namjoon stands from his chair and pats your shoulder as he walks out, while Jungkook just

flashes his bunny smile and follows.

You feel like you can barely breathe when you sit down in Namjoon's desk chair.

"I'm sorry," Yoongi chokes out, head still hanging, looking small and defeated. "I'm just so fucking sorry."

"What happened last night?" You ask, trying to ignore the ache in your chest, how badly you ache to reach out and take his hand.

Yoongi shakes his head. "Nothing. I got too drunk and Kookie was worried and... I'm sorry. I'm sorry it got out, I didn't want that."

"So what, you're upset your dirty little secret got out?" You spit out, grateful for the anger that rises in you because it helps not to hurt so much.

Yoongi looks up at you, and the look on his face spears right through your heart. He looks so tired, so stricken, and all you want to do is throw yourself into his arms and you hate yourself for it.

"No. No, I'm upset because I was a fucking idiot. I thought I could protect you. I thought I could keep you from...from all this."

You're quiet for a moment, your blood boiling, head spinning. "Are you trying to tell me that you broke up with me ...that you ripped my heart out ...to protect me?"

You can see his Adam's apple bob as he swallows. "I...you don't understand, Y/n, you don't know what it's like, what people are like when stuff like this gets out…"

You’re stunned into silence, and Yoongi wrings his hands in his lap. “Y/n.”

“Fuck you, Min Yoongi,” you say, voice shaking, and you stand up, trembling with rage. “You think I didn’t think about that? You think I didn’t know that things might get hairy, dating an idol? You thought I just jumped into this without knowing that?”

He’s looking up at you blankly, mouth parted. “I-”

“I did it anyway, Yoongi. I did it anyway because I’m in love with you, you fucking idiot!” Angry tears are spilling from your eyes.

Yoongi swallows again and stands, his hands coming out and hovering near your arms, as if he’s afraid you might push him away. “Y/n...I...I love you. I still love you so fucking much, and I-”

A sob hitches in your chest. “Why are you doing this? Why are you doing this now? What’s changed, Yoongi? You must still think I’m too weak and stupid to date you, to get through stupid shit like scandals and being apart -”

“I don’t-”

“The only thing that’s changed is that I’m moving on. I’m moving on and you’re not, you’re just moping around and demanding to know who I’m fucking like you didn’t give up any right to know that the second you broke up with me over a fucking phone call!”

Yoongi’s breath catches in his throat, and his eyes are wet, searching your face.

“It’s not like that, baby, I swear. I swear to you. I thought I could do this. I thought I was strong enough to let you go and let you be happier but I’m not. I’m fucking not and it’s a knife through my gut every time you look right through me like I never meant anything to you. Did I? Did I ever mean anything to you?”

“How can you even ask me that?” You’re sobbing in earnest, now, and you suddenly feel defeated, sitting down on the couch hard.

You feel him sit down next to you, feel his hand rubbing circles on your back and it just makes you sob harder. It’s been such a long few weeks, so many nights just crying and wondering why he didn’t want you, why he’d turned on a dime from the sweet, soft boy he was with you to that harsh asshole on the phone, telling you he was too busy to listen to you cry.

"I know I don't deserve your forgiveness," Yoongi says, voice shaking. "I know I don't deserve you. I never did, but I….I still want you. I need you, baby, I feel like I can't breathe without you."

"Why are you doing this to me? Why now, when I was just starting to think there was life after you…"

Yoongi's hands clutch at yours. "Please," he gasps. "Please, don't. I don't want you to move on. I can't watch you move on, Y/n, it'll kill me."

"Because you're jealous? Because you're territorial? Some knee jerk reaction-"

"No. No! Because I realized that you're stronger than me. I realized I had underestimated you."

You can't speak, just crying, and Yoongi cups your face in his hands.

"Please," he says, voice low and broken. "Please, let me...let me touch you? Let me show you how much I still love you, doll, please…"

You whimper in the back of your throat, giving in, letting yourself melt against his mouth when he kisses you, hard and hungry and desperate, and you know this might all fall apart, that you might end up heartbroken all over again, but you can't bring yourself to care.

***

There's something in him that's so desperate he can barely remember to breathe when you kiss him back, when your hands clutch at his shirt, something in him telling him this might be the last time he gets to feel his palms on your skin, the last time he hears his name breathy on your lips, and it hurts, feels like broken glass in his chest because this, buried inside you a few moments later, this is the place he feels most at home.

He ignores his body urging him to go faster, fucks you slow and deep, tears spilling from his eyes like they'll never stop, blurring your face. He wants this to last as long as it can, wants to burn the memory behind his eyelids so that he can bring it up when he thinks he can't keep going, when you leave him because he deserves it, because he hurt you.

He doesn't delude himself that he'll have the strength not to beg you to stay, so he makes it last, ignoring the pull in his stomach, the ache in his balls, your whimpering and pleading.

The couch is too small to touch you everywhere like he wants, to commit the memory of your skin under his hands, so he cups your face, kissing along your cheekbones, the salt of your tears and his own tangy on his tongue.

"I'm sorry," he says, words hitching in his chest because they aren't enough, even combined with the reverent way he's looking at you, how his body is slotted with yours like a puzzle piece. "I love you. I love you so fucking much and I'm so fucking sorry."

Your only answer is the way your back arches, how your cunt clenches around his cock.

Yoongi cries out in frustration when he can't hold back anymore, when he spills inside you, kissing you over and over again, moaning into your mouth and he holds you so tight when it's over, feeling the aftershocks of your orgasm pulse around his spent cock and he hides his face in your neck when you wiggle under him.

"Not yet. Not yet, please." He murmurs against your skin, feeling wide open and raw, like if he lets you up you'll slip away from him for good and you're breathing hard under him.

"Yoongi. Yoongi, let me up." Your voice is soft but he thinks maybe that hurts worse than if you we're yelling and he shifts to let you up, covers his face with his hands as he hears you shuffling to get dressed, feeling like there's someone sitting on his chest.

He thinks for a moment that he can do it, that he won't break down and beg you not to go but after a moment of silence a sob catches in his throat.

"Baby. Y/n," he mutters, and it's a hoarse whisper that hurts his throat. "Don't."

You take his hands from his face and you're dressed and kneeling beside him on the floor.

"Yoongi."

He looks over at you miserably, and your eyes are so soft it's a spear through him and he prays there's enough liquor hidden somewhere in Namjoon's office to get him through the day.

"If I give you another chance, will I regret it?" You ask, searching his face, and he's so shocked he doesn't answer for a second.

He scrambles up, adjusting his half off clothes, leaning down towards you.

"Never," he breathes. "Never, I'll never hurt you again, I swear."

You worry your bottom lip between your teeth and there's hope rising in his chest and he's not sure he'll survive it if you change your mind, not now, so he cups your face in bis hands, brushes his nose against yours.

"I swear, baby. I'll be so good to you, always."

"Yoongi...I can't do this again. You can't do this to me ever again."

He shakes his head fiercely. "Never, never, never," he chants, kissing you all over your face, and when you smile the pressure in his chest finally breaks.

He pulls you up into his lap, squeezing you tight, kissing every inch of exposed skin he can reach, and you're giggling when you pull away and it feels strange to be smiling, like he's almost forgotten how.

"I gotta go to work now," you say, smiling, and Yoongi pouts.

"I just got you back. You can't go to work." He grumbles, and you kiss his nose.

"I can go to work, and you can go home and shower and sleep. You're a mess, Min Yoongi."

He nods solemnly. "I am. I've been such a big mess without you. You have to take care of me. I clearly can't do it myself."

You grin and that's when there is a soft knock on the door, Namjoon peeking his head in.

You scramble up and Yoongi whines, grabbing at your hand.

You manage to dodge him and he stands up, squeezing your hand in his. You look up at him. "I'm gonna try to get out of work," you say, and peck his cheek before releasing his hand.

As you pass Namjoon you nod to him. "Thank you."

Namjoon smiles at Yoongi.

"Yes, thank you," Yoongi says quickly. "Thank Kookie for me, too." As he passes Namjoon, he whispers, "I'll replace the couch."

"Wait, what?" The leader calls after him.

***

He spends days with you, hands all over you, murmuring apologies into your skin with his mouth and his hands and you end up having to take three days off because of muscle strain.

When you try to go home on the third day, he sits up and grabs you around the waist, yanks you back into bed.

“Move in with me,” he whispers against your neck, and things move pretty fast after that, even though he still gets nervous when you go out in public, making you wear a hat and a mask and clutching your hand tight.

It’s worth it, in the end, all his worry and fear, because he gets you at the end of the day, gets to hold you tight against him and bury his face in your hair and breathe in your scent, and he’ll be damned if he ever does anything to jeopardize that ever again.

#min yoongi x reader #yoongi x reader #yoongi imagine #suga imagine #suga x reader #yoongi fanfiction #yoongi angst #yoongi smut #yoongi series

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not-so-mundane-after-all · 5 years

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My absolute favorite thing in Descendants 3 (besides the soundtrack, which is 🔥🔥🔥) is the progression of Mal's realtionship with Hades. I have a weak spot for those kinds of relationships so it obviously won me over from the first second. All her life, Mal's only knowledge about her father was what her mother has told her - and considering this whole "you abandoned me when I was a baby" thing and her attitude towards him, Maleficent hasn't told her anything remotely positive. And then he jumps out with "No. I left your mother." implying that there's a whole story behind it, a story Mal doesn't know about and fuck, did they realy had to put this whole thing in the last movie of the franchise? There could be a whole ass angsty backstory, where Hades wanted this kid, wanted to be in his daughter's life, but Maleficent, being not the easiest person to get along with, did something to prevent that. She had always wanted power - she says in the first movie how she and Mal can rule together. Why Maleficent would even want to share? I don't think she would. Mal is a witch demigod - if you're familiar with Percy Jackson novels, you know how powerful that kind of combination can be. To have such a power bomb as a kid? Yeah, it's obvious she would want to keep this to herself. So Hades had no choice but to leave. But he still keeps an eye on his daughter from the distance. I mean, the way their first scene was written? Their first interaction in the movie? It's obviously not their first meeting, even if they are not in each other's lives. Mal holds a life-long grudge against him, thanks to her mother no less, and Hades, after 16 years of dealing with this bullshit, just plays the part. But during the song his real emotions sometimes leak through the facade. I'm sorry, but the line "I've given you everything by giving you nothing" hit me hard. It means that he actually believed Mal would be better of without him. But then he sings "How 'bout I go with you and we'll spend some time?" and "Let's make new memories, you can show me the town" meaning he wants to catch up and reconcile. But of course Mal sees some kind of hidden agenda behind it - for her, he's doing it because she's going to be queen soon and he wants to take advantage for that. If you analyze the lyrics, their entire number, despite having a happy, rock and roll upbeat melody, is extremely sad and angsty. She then demands the ember from him, and he gives it to her in the end - and why would he give away his only source of power? Because she's his daughter, and he can see how much of him is actually in her, even though she was raised by Maleficent. She's confident, she gets what she wants and she's not afraid to ask and demand. And he's proud - if the "That's my girl" comment is any indication. Then Celia reveals to Mal that Hades was "always asking about her" and this is the first time Mal has a proof that he actually cares. But she pushes it to the back of her mind, because there's more immediate problem at hand.

When they bring him to Auradon by the end of the movie, Mal gets another proof. "Actually he might do it for me." she says but she gambles. She doesn't know if he will come to save Audrey. Why would he even care? But he came. Because she was the one to ask. You think he would come if it was the Beast or Audrey's Family to ask? No way. He says "I didn't have much choice." but I feel like it's more about not having a choice in being dragged there by guards, handcuffed, than about agreeing to come. He does it all for Mal. No hidden agenda. If there was one, he wouldn't let those guards handcuff him again, he wouldn't be so calm about it. And when they take him away... Mal's face broke me. It was like she wanted to say "wait, no! Don't take him!" and then she gathered up the courage to go after him. That whole scene made me weep. All it took was "I'm gonna have to miss you all over again." and I'm sobbing. Maybe I'm reaching, but for me, when he said "Thanks for the glimpse of the sun", it meant so much more than that. And when Mal kisses his cheek... It's a Thank you, I forgive you, I'll miss you and I love you all in one. He gives her the ember back (again, his main source of power) and winks at her, as if to say keep it, it's yours. She holds it to herself, tears streaming down her face and I think this is the moment she makes a decision to take down the barrier. Because there's no way she ever wants to be separated from him again.

Which brings us to their best (or at least the cutest) scene in the movie.

"Am I invited to the wedding?"

At this point I was jumping on my bed, screaming. What an entrance! Kudos to Ben being completely frozen, even though he was able to keep his cool durring their first meeting. But it was business then. He was a king back there. Now he's boy who is facing his girlfriend's (well, fiance's) scary dad for the first time. You thought Maleficent was bad? Well, buckle up! And Mal just jumps into her father's arms with that cute laugh and my heart melts every time I'm watching this scene. And how Hades smiles at her and slowly hugs her back, first one arm, then the other, and then he just snuggles to her and I think he even kisses her head, and I'm here like 😍😍😍 At this point you know that past is the past, they're both ready to start over and rebuild this relationship, and they couldn't be happier about it. A new beggining indeed. And I love how Hades shows his approval for her relationship with Ben, saying he's sure they will be happy together, and Mal is beaming. But the moment she doesn't look, The Scary Dad jumps out and he gives Ben this look that had me dying on the floor. I'm watching you. Hurt her and I'll end you. We stan a Protective Dad!Hades, YES! And Ben... Well, even beasts can be afraid sometimes. 😂😂

Oh, what I would give to see how it progresses further, and a prequel movie would be nice. Or a novel. Or at least fanfiction. I know this movie has been out for like only two days, but fanfic writers, chop chop! I'm starving 😂.

I love this whole thing with my whole heart and I wish we could get more. Congrats to Dove Cameron and Cheyenne Jackson - their chemistry was off the charts and their voices were perfectly matched. Well done, Kenny Ortega. 👏👏👏

Extra kudos for one more small detail - I love how Mal's hair got more and more blue every time she used the ember. Nice little thing they put there.

#descendants #descendants 3 #mal #hades #mal the daughter of maleficent #maleficent #spoilers #descendants spoilers #mal bertha #d3

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madonna-la-cardinalessa · 5 years

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Another tag by my beautiful friend @tiffany-of-wales which I am glad to do finally :D

Flower tag:

jasmine; what mythical creature do you wish actually existed?

Unicorns. And I also believe that what we call mythical creatures once did exist and somewhere still do.

lavender; soundcloud or vinyls?

May I say CDs instead? I always like to have a CD booklet and like own the CD, putting it in my cupboard and say “ Look, I own this.” – not only on an online platform.

primrose; what book does everyone right now need to read?

Hmmm. Everyone? I do not think every book if for everyone but I recommend classics from Goethe, Schiller, Lessing and Shakespeare.

lunar mist; do you like wearing other people’s shirts/jackets?

I share some clothes with my mom. But if I had a boyfriend rn I would love to cuddle in his hoodies at times I think^^”

bird of paradise; what was the best thing that happened to you this month?

That I finished my bachelor’s thesis. I learned so much and I hope the work was worth it so that I pass it and get a good mark!

gardenia; what’s a promise you’ve recently made to yourself?

That I will try to get things done now that I have time during Corona.

lion’s fairytale; would you rather be the sky, the ocean or the forests?

Forests!

whirling butterflies; would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Definitely not Ö.ö

marmalade skies; do you plan your outfits?

Yes!

apricot drift; how do you feel right now?

Bored. I don’t like the current situation.

everlasting daisy; what’s the last dream you remember having?

Omg this night I dreamed sm shit, I swear. I was horse riding at night in the forests (no sane soul would do that lol) and found a deserted planetarium.

queen’s cup; what are you craving right now?

Getting a good mark on my bachelor’s thesis xD Oh, and I hope that I will be able to visit Rome this year – we had to cancel the Rome trip that was planned in a week for obvious reasons..

lavender dream; turn ons/offs?

Dangerous vibes/ being clingy and/or wimpy.

water lilly; when was the last time you cried?

Last week I think. Maybe the one before that.

lily of the valley; did the one person who hurt you most in your life apologize?

No.

winterberry; do you bite or lick your ice cream?

Depends, actually I do both.

honey perfume; favorite movie ever?

Hände weg von Mississippi (2007), Die Wilden Hühner (2006), most Studio Ghibli movies.

desert rose; do you like yourself?

Yes, I do.

snapdragon; have you ever met or seen in person a celebrity?

Yes, I did.

night owl; how many countries have you visited?

Only 5.

heliotrope; have you ever been in a castle?

Many, many times. I love visiting castles and monasteries.

creams and sky; what’s the craziest/bravest thing you’ve done?

Riding nearly every day into the woods with my high speed thoroughbred? xD Does that count? My girl is FAST.

lantana; what’s on your mind right now?

My horse Poly <3

pumpkin patch; what’s your zodiac sign?

I’m a Capricorn.

tulip; name 5 facts about yourself.

1. Even though I may look like it, I am no party girl at all.

2. Since childhood I had to deal with envy towards me which is why I never had many friends.

3. My best friend and I broke up several times – we’re both stubborn but we love each other a lot.

4. My love for history started with a documentary I watched when I was about 14. It was about vampirism in the balkan states. And it manifested with watching “The Tudors”, since then I knew that I wanted to study history – and now I do.

5. Without my friend Sandy I would have never settled down in church history during the Renaissance.

daphne; do you believe in karma?

Absolutely.

queen of the meadow; ever been in love?

Never with a person from this time period, no. I hope I will in near future tough.

wisteria; whom do you admire and why?

People who don’t spend their time with overthinking what other people might think of them.

angel’s face; what was your favorite bedtime story as a child?

The tales my father invented for me.

remember me; did you make someone laugh today?

My dog when I offered him a bit of my banana.

iris; do you believe in ghosts?

Yes.

lilac; if you could go back in time which time period would you visit?

That is hard. Renaissance Italy sure is fascinating but 17th century Europe comes to my mind more often, it’s weird.

caramel kisses; would you want to live forever? why/why not?

Maybe not living forever, But I would not mind at all staying young and beautiful as long as I live xD

primula; what makes you sad?

What mankind does to the world, to the earth to it’s creatures: plants and animals. I think we deserve to suffer and die out.

rain lily; was today typical? why/why not?

No, since everything is upside down thanks to Corona.

queen anne’s lace; who do you trust the most?

Myself.

Lady’s slipper; what did you have for breakfast today?

Toast with Nutella and fennel tea. <3.

forget me not; do you have any regrets looking back in your life?

I wished I had done more social things during my teens. I was always studying and reading with my head in the clouds. I wonder how things would be different now when I had been in relationships earlier etc.

lunaria; what’s your favorite fictional universe?

Torn between LOTR and Harry Potter.

violet; favorite tv show?

Borgia, now and always.

sunflower; share a favorite quote.

Look like the innocent flower, but be the serpent under it.

snowdrop; what does your ideal day look like?

Getting up early, go seeing my horse and take a long ride into the woods. The weather would be cold but sunny. After having a nice lunch with my mom I would relax in the afternoon and then go visiting my best friend, for dinner we would have sushi and watch a nice movie together like best friends do. When I got home I would watch an episode of Borgia to relax and then go to bed <3.

tiger lily; do you have any hobbies?

Reading, writing, history, horse riding, dreaming…..

peony; share a small random book passage that means something to you.

In Neil Gaiman’s Coraline when Coraline is about to find the last child’s soul and the other crazy old man says: “You’re too clever and too quiet for them to understand. They don’t even get your name right.” I feel that sm.

tea rose; what’s something you always wanted to do but were too scared?

Partying maybe? I am a very shy person and would feel uncomfortable but I am afraid I miss something always staying at home at night.

honeysuckle; do you usually date people your age or older/younger?

Mostly about my age, but I like the guys to be older than me tbh.

sweet pea; who means the world to you?

My horse Poly.

love in the mist; best books you’ve ever read?

Actually I really enjoy Ludwig von Pastor’s History of the Popes. It may have it’s flaws but I it is really good researched and I appreciate all the notes and footnotes. Even though it’s academic literature it is still enjoyable to read.

foxglove; who is your favorite cartoon character?

Sailor Moon! If that counts as a cartoon.

magnolia; coffee or tea?

Tea, I have one right now.

crown imperial; would you rather be extremely rich or extremely loved?

Can’t I have both?

snowflake; are you a dog or a cat person?

I love both but probably more a dog person.

bell flower; what is your biggest addiction?

History.

cosmos; do you ever think about the galaxy?

Yes, we are so small, aren’t we? And yet mankind pretends to be so special and to know everything. How pitiful.

moonflower; what’s your favorite color?

Fir Green.

freesia; do you have a good relationship with your parents and siblings? why/why not?

I think so, yes.

sundrop; are you a morning or a night person?

A morning person.

poppy; have you ever dealt with a mental illness?

Yes, but I try to lock it inside.

clover; how would your friends describe you?

Calm but clever.

dandelion; do you consider yourself and extrovert or an introvert?

Introvert.

lilly; what’s something you love watching/reading but you are too embarrassed to admit you do?

In romance novels I am always waiting for the s*x passages lol xD Probably because this kind of thing is missing in my life atm xD

anemone; describe yourself in 3 words.

Astute, spiritual, special.

lotus; best memory as a child?

The holidays in Bavaria. Nothing was more beautiful.

angelonia; what is your eye and hair color?

Smokey grey, blonde.

dahlia; do you like crystals?

Yes.

buttercup; if you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?

Let everything bad for the environment disappear.

baby’s breath; what’s your hogwarts house?

Slytherin.

calendula; biggest pet peeve?

Pollution.

blanker flower; would you rather go to a cocktail party with your best friends or stay home and read a book/watch a movie with your pet?

If you read everything till now you will now – stay home with my pet and watch a movie/read a book. xD

blazing star; share a secret.

Why would I?

carnation; would you rather live longer or happier?

Happier.

petunia; who’s story is your biggest inspiration in life? why?

I stopped looking for rolemodels but try to live and be the best I can.

bluebell; do you wear glasses?

Nope.

And I tag everyone who wants to do this :D

#about me #me

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thebeethathums · 5 years

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Home - 8

Pairing: John Watson x HolmesTwin!Reader

Warnings: The reader in this fic is a TWIN to Sherlock Holmes and as such shares some physical features to him. Please read at your own discretion with this in mind.

A/N: Bolded text indicates John’s Blog Posts

You practically fell down the stairs just as John was wishing his date a final good night, grabbing the door and flinging it open so you could pull the women inside by her upper arm, “Did you kiss her?”

Mrs. Hudson popped her head out of her apartment to see what all the noise was about and you snapped, “Back inside, Mrs. H.”

She disappeared quickly, knowing better than to question you, and John floundered, wondering what the hell had gotten into you. To any sane person, including John, this looked like a rather violent fit of jealousy as you pinned his date to the wall and demanded again, “John, did you kiss her?”

He bellowed, “Bloody Hell, (F/n)! Get off her!” and you let out an exasperated growl as he moved to pry you away from the petite blonde who was beginning to panic under your forceful grasp. He only got so far as to reach for your arm before he wobbled back dangerously and you hissed, “Dammit! You did.”

Trusting your brain and it’s rapidly created solution, you let go of the woman to grab the front of John’s jumper, pressing him up against the front door to block her from leaving as you attacked his lips with yours. He tried to fight it at first but after a moment he kissed back, even stopping you from pulling away when you’d deemed you’d successfully transferred enough of the antidote from your lips to his. Getting caught up in it, you momentarily enjoyed the way his lips fit perfectly against yours before he ran his tongue along your lip in a plea to gain entrance to your mouth and snapped you back to reality. You shoved him back into the door in order to pull away, gazing at his extremely befuddled face for only a split second before turning to find that you were looking down the barrel of a gun. Fantastic.

The blonde’s grip on the weapon was firm in an attempt to keep her hand from shaking and you ascertained that she preferred impersonal ways of killing since she didn’t have the stomach to get up close and personal- too much blood and gore. You blinked as she stumbled, “W-What did you do? H-He should be d-dead.”

You held up your hands as John slid to the floor breathing heavily and cheekily offered, “A kiss to make it better...Isn't that what they say?”

She glared at you as you sidestepped so you blocked her from taking a shot at John, “T-Tell me what you did or I’ll shoot!”

You smirked numbly, “Go ahead. My twin’s already dead. You’d be doing me a favor.”

This threw her for a loop, having not been the answer she’d expected, and you huffed a little tauntingly, “You can’t do it, can you? You only like knowing that you’ve ended a life but not actually seeing it. Pathetic.”

She waved the gun at you wildly, “You’re wrong! I will!”

You just chuckled darkly, “I wish you would but you won’t. I can see why he left you.”

“What?” she whispered, eyes going wide with panic and confusion.

“Your fiancé. He left you because you are weak and dull and now you kill men who remind you of him with a clever mix of the chemicals you use in your work as a toxicologist. Weak and pathetic. You couldn't even stomach murdering him, only men like him… A sad example of revenge if you ask me. I’m impressed you thought to put it in your lipstick though. Doing so made its origins almost untraceable… almost. Too bad your fiancé was right about you being a dull idiot and you made the mistake of going after John. He and I are going to have to have a serious talk about what he puts in that blog of his after this.”

She made a sort of flabbergasted noise in her throat as she gaped at you and you took a few steps closer, “I mean sure, I was getting close to figuring it out and his death would have definitely been a distraction but until now I really had no way of finding you. So thank you for literally showing up right on my doorstep. Makes my job so much easier.”

By the time you were finished with you little deduction rant, she was crying and wobbling pathetically, allowing you to easily grab the gun from her hand and turn it on her, calling over your shoulder, “John? Are you alright?”

Still a little hazy from both the kiss and the poison, he carefully pushed himself up off the floor as he puffed, “I think so.”

You yawned, “Good. Now would you please call Lestrade? I’d very much like it if your date was no longer in our flat,” completely calm despite what had just happened. John did as you asked as quickly as he was able and once Lestrade was on his way, you lowered the gun to look over at him, idly tossing your captive, “Move and, unlike you, I won’t hesitate to shoot.”

Giving John your full attention, you scanned his person worriedly, noting he was pale and still looked a little stunned, and then ordered, “Go lie down. All those chemicals provided a nasty shock to your system and you need to rest.”

Looking between the two of you, he opened his mouth to protest but you shook your head, “I was a soldier, John. I think I can handle one petite blonde for a few minutes, don’t you? Now shoo.”

Reluctantly, he climbed the stairs and you fidgeted, silently fretting over him, before knocking lightly on Mrs. Hudson’s door, your eyes still locked on your captive. She opened it a little warily and you offered her a signature Holmes smirk, “Would you be a dear and go make John a cuppa? He’s had a bit of a scare.”

“Of course, dear… I'll take care of him for you while you get that tart out of here. You two make such an adorable couple.”

Instead of correcting her you just let the corner of your mouth twitch up and then watched her climb the stairs, it wasn’t worth effort to try and explain.

Untitled

She just saved my life by kissing me. Is it bad that I enjoyed it?

You climbed the stairs after convincing Lestrade that John would come to give an official statement in the morning and found John on the couch with tea and Mrs. Hudson in the kitchen, trying to clean your mess.

John’s eyes snapped to you when you walked in but you just trudged to your room, flatly offering, “Be more careful in the future, John. You were fortunate I finished the antidote when I did… oh and we need milk.”

The door clicked shut before he could respond and he sighed, wondering what exactly he’d expected from Sherlock’s twin, and you flopped on your brother’s bed to look at the ceiling, thinking over everything that had happened as the grief and despair began to settle in again.

There was no way you were going to be able to sleep, even being as tired as you were, so you huffed and thought about kissing John. It had been the only solution- you weren’t supposed to like it. Maybe before Sherlock, before you were alone, the two of you could have had something… That might have been kind of nice. You’d always been a hopeless romantic, despite growing up being told that caring and love were weaknesses you shouldn't bother with.

It used to drive Sherlock up the wall and Mycroft certainly disapproved but you didn’t care. You’d read all those books about classic romance, about love prevailing and such, and you wanted that in your life. Sherlock had always blamed it on your lack of a Y-chromosome- for which of course you promptly punched him- but now… you considered that your brothers might have had a point. You’d cared about and loved Sherlock with all your heart and look where it had gotten you.

Curling up into a ball as the sadness you'd been keeping locked away while you worked got the better of you, a sob escaped your lips and you let yourself get lost in the memories of happier times.

The Kissing Conundrum

When I went out on a date with Tracy Miller, I never expected the night to end with a gun pointed at me and a heated kiss from (F/n). It seemed so normal and actually quite pleasant. We went to a fun restaurant over in West End, had a few drinks, and then she offered to let the cab drop me off first since Baker St. was closer than her home. I thought finally a nice woman that I connect with- this could work- and then she tried to poison me. Yeah. That kind of put a damper on things.

(F/n) figured it all out before I even knew… which lead to a tense moment where she pinned Tracy against the wall and I thought she was jealous. Before I could do anything, I started to feel woozy and next thing I know (F/n)’s shoved me up against the door and her lips are against mine. Her very soft and warm lips. It was actually a little fantastic. Even with the gun pointed at us after.

Everything beyond that is kind of a blur but Lestrade informed me that (F/n) broke Tracy’s nose or rather ‘She fell’ as (F/n) claims. It would seem that’s another way she’s like Sherlock. He always protected the things he cared about… no matter what people said about him not having a heart or being able to care. So I know she cares but how much? Is it just as a friend of the brother she loved? Her friend? Or something more?

It's difficult to tell. She seemed to enjoy the kiss but she hasn’t left his room since then and that was two days ago… not to mention her response to the whole thing was to tell me to get milk. I thought things were getting better. That she was letting me in. Perhaps I was wrong.

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5sauceprefs · 6 years

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ghost of you (l.h)

Hey guys THIS IS FUCKEN SAD LOL.

Request: Promp list!!! I couldn’t choose one so i kinda put some together to create a story and you can write the rest.. and can it be with LUKE, please? Thanks!💛 “I can hear you crying through the door” “I’ve been so worried about you lately” “Baby answer the question” “You think this is what okay looks like?” “I’m suffocating” “My heart feels heavy” LOVE YOU

Summary: You and Luke begin to experience the hardships of a long distance relationship. You are excited to finally see Luke as he returns home, however will things go back to normal despite your fear that your relationship is just based off memories of happier times? That the two of you are constantly chasing after what was a loving relationship before Luke was always away?

Word count: 3500+ (why did I write so much when it’s sad lol)

Here we go.

You flattened down your top for what felt like the millionth time. Another quick dust of your pants. A quick fix of your hair. Anything to put off having to actually leave your room. The ding! of your phone made you jump; you were completely on edge. Walking over to your bed, you picked up your phone to have a look at the message you knew was coming.

Hey baby, can’t wait to see you x

Luke had been sending these types of messages all day, not constantly but enough to remind you why you felt a hole in your heart and a bottomless pit in your stomach that was full of nothing but nervous waves. You wiped your clammy hands on your pants again, unlocking your phone.

Same here babe x

Except that was a lie; you most definitely could wait. You locked your phone, the lock screen lighting up; a photo of you and Luke pulling silly faces, his arm wrapped around you tightly and pulling you close to him. That felt like it was years and years ago, a faded memory that couldn’t help your nerves. Another look in the mirror and you decided it was time to stop being a little bitch and leave your apartment.

5 Seconds of Summer’s Youngblood had just received its number 1 spot in Australia. Whilst the boys were back in Australia for this leg of the ‘Meet you There’ tour, they decided it would be great to celebrate their achievements since releasing the album. This meant a big party, lots of people, and lots of drinking. Not an ideal situation when it was your first time seeing Luke again, but at this point you would take whatever you could get. Even a Facetime would be great. You just wanted to see his face again and know the two of you were okay, that distance hadn’t affected your relationship at all.

You were so happy for Luke and the boys, there was no denying it. However, the back to back tours were starting to take a toll on your relationship with Luke, especially considering your career was starting to take off on its own direction now too. It was hard to get any time at all with Luke, and now the one time you were seeing him was a big party where he’d be drunk and busy with everyone else to even notice you. Which was fine, you knew what you had signed up for getting into this relationship with him, but you couldn’t help but feel a little upset that it had to fall on your two-year anniversary. Two years, just like that.

They say time flies when you’re having fun, but you could argue that time flies even faster when you actually never see your significant other.

You headed downstairs into the Uber you ordered, having denied Luke’s previous insistence that you be driven by their driver to the party, and sat in the back seat. You scrolled through your phone, watching the boys’ Instagram stories that they had put up for the party. It was happening at The Rocks, on a big yacht that was going to cruise all around Sydney Harbour. You didn’t live too far away, so you didn’t have much time to prepare yourself to calm down. It had literally been months since you last saw Luke. Today, when the boys arrived, was the first time you had heard his voice in a month when he rang you to tell you about Youngblood’s accolades and the party tonight. You picked at your nail polish, remembering the conversation.

Your phone rang loud and clear as soon as you started your lunch break and you swore your heart could have exploded at the sight of Luke’s goofy face on your phone, signalling that your boyfriend was finally calling you. ‘

“Hello!” You picked up eagerly, not caring that you sounded a little crazy.

“Baby! We made Number 1 in Australia!” Luke’s voice cheered back and you grinned. You didn’t care he forgot your anniversary; this was a big deal! Anyways, you knew once you saw him tonight, after a few hours to let today sink in, he would realise and the two of you would celebrate after the party how you always did. Take-away ice-cream and dancing in your apartment that the two of you shared in Sydney. Even though it was really just you that lived there most of the time.

“Congratulations! I told you,” you laughed into the phone. You could picture Luke rolling his bright blue eyes on his end of the call. A few cheers in the background and Luke’s laughter going through the phone let you know he was with the boys.

“I just can’t believe it actually happened. We’re celebrating tonight,” Luke said and you couldn’t help but do a little dance on the spot; he remembered!

“I can’t wait, I was thinking ice-cream and d-“

“On a yacht on The Rocks! We’re having a big party for Number 1! Everyone’s going to be there baby, you’re coming right?” Luke interrupted and you could tell he hadn’t heard what you were saying before. You bit down on your lip but decided not to worry. This was Luke’s day; it was time to celebrate him. Your little anniversary ritual could wait.

“Of course baby, I’ll be there,” you nodded even though he couldn’t see you.

“Great, Ashton stop!” You could hear Luke’s laugh as he distractedly talked to you.

“I lov-“

“Baby, I gotta go. I’ll text you the details!” Luke said into the phone, he sounded distracted with what was happening with his end of the phone call, before hanging up. The photo of you and Luke on your lock screen staring back at you.

You were so happy to hear his voice, but this was how all your phone calls had been. That’s if you and Luke ever did get to talk on the phone. It was rare that the time difference allowed the two of you to talk to each other, that either Luke or you weren’t too busy to talk to each other.

You tried to ignore the little sick feeling that appeared in your stomach. You swallowed hard, trying to get by with your day, the thought of Luke forgetting your anniversary making the butterflies bigger and bigger.

Nervous was an understatement; you were shitting it. You had been feeling a little upset, missing Luke, for quite some time now, and all you wanted was to see him to reassure yourself and your heart that he was still what you wanted. That this life with him was what you wanted. There was only so much more you could give with receiving little back until it took too much from you. It has getting harder and harder to come home, the place that Luke and you had bought together, without him. To talk to him less and less. To go about your days as if he wasn’t apart of your life anymore, even though he was. To only know how he was through Twitter, Instagram, but not know anything that was happening personally.

You were also trying to convince yourself that it was completely normal to feel this nervous before seeing your boyfriend. You weren’t actually sure if you were excited, which surprised you because you really did miss him.

You went to the Harbour, boarding the yacht as you showed your I.D. to the bouncer. He smiled, letting you in with a nod of his head. You walked past him, constantly playing with the ends of your hair. You looked around; there was already so many people here and you weren’t even leaving the dock for another five minutes. There was a DJ in one corner, a long table covered with assorted cheeses, crackers, fruits, all kinds of finger foods. The bar was lit up and full, all different kinds of liquor on show. It was definitely going to be a big night; you were going to need to down a few mimosas before you were ready to see any of the boys.

“Y/N!” Looks like the night had other plans. You turned around finding Ashton approaching you, a big smile on his face. His blue button-up shirt wasn’t fully buttoned up to show off the several gold chains around his neck, he wore the classic black skinny jeans and boots to match. He looked good and the sight of him almost made you tear up.

“Ashton,” you cried, a grin on your face as you hugged him. He laughed, giving you a squeeze. “Congratulations,” you said as he pulled away.

“Thanks, I can’t believe it,” he ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head in disbelief.

“I can,” you grinned, wiggling your eyebrows.

“Are you drinking?” Ashton asked, gesturing to your empty hands. You nodded, following him to the bar. “Have you seen Luke yet?” Ashton asked you as you waited for the bartender to make your mimosa. You shook your head.

“No, do you know where he is?” You asked and Ashton shrugged. The bartender handed you your mimosa and you smiled in thanks, following Ashton as he helped you find Luke.

“Ashton! The man of the hour,” a bald man came up and cried, patting Ashton on the back. He gave you an apologetic smile, to which you dismissed with a laugh, letting him walk off with the bald man as you searched for Luke on your own. This yacht was fucking massive; it was going to take you all night at this point to find Luke. It honestly wouldn’t surprise you at this point if you didn’t even see him tonight with the way things were going.

Then you found him. Standing tall and happy, a beer in his ring-clad hand. He had a big smile on his face, his blue eyes looked a little tired but still bright, his hair was a little longer, pushed back, and he wore a red silk button-up, his black skinny jeans, and his boots. Your heart felt like it was glowing. All those days alone were now worth it. All that time spent wishing you could just see, touch, smell your boyfriend and have him with you was now real. With a grin on your face, you started walking over to the group to go see, kiss, hug, touch your boyfriend. Maybe it was a good thing that they had decided to do this party; you knew you would have never left the bed if Luke and you had spent the night alone together.

You came up from behind him, tapping him on the shoulder with a big grin on your face, looking stupid. Luke turned around, his eyes widening and his smile getting even bigger. It made everything inside you feel whole. Your heart was Luke’s, no wonder it felt small and missing when he was gone. He took it with him and now he was here and could give you what was rightfully yours, his love.

“Y/N!” He said, as if he couldn’t believe you were standing in front of him even though he invited you. He placed a hand on your shoulder, making your grin falter a little bit. You had been expecting a kiss at the very least. “I’m just talking with a big producer baby, how about you get us some more drinks and a seat by the back and I’ll meet you there in a second?” He said quietly and smiled before turning back around. “So, where was I?” Luke grinned.

You stood there for a second, trying to process what the fuck had just happened. Get a couple of drinks and a seat and he’d be there in a second? No ‘baby!’, ‘I missed you!’, ‘Let me love you until the sun rises!’, ‘Happy two-year anniversary!’? Just a touch of the shoulder and then a fucking order for drinks and a seat?

Your heart, which had been glowing and growing twice its size moments ago, was now small. So small you thought the hole that had been there at the beginning of the night had swallowed it. Luke did have your heart, but he had left it behind when he had first left you to go on tour, and now it was anywhere but with his heart. You realised this now.

You walked over to the bar, before you stopped. Wait, what were you doing? Actually going to go get a drink for Luke? He had completely dismissed you in front of the ‘big producers’, basically treated you like his little bitch, and then you were actually going to do it? Plus, he had forgotten your anniversary after all your hints and references. Fuck this. No wonder you were feeling so nervous and sad to come; future you had your back and knew some fucked up shit was going to happen. A burning in your throat signalled that a fat cry was coming along, so you quickly walked over to the on-board bathroom.

“Testing, testing, 1,2,3? DJ Calum, 1, 2, 3?” Calum’s voice made you turn around as he talked into the microphone at the DJ’s set-up, your vision a little blurry from the tears that were threatening to spill. “Welcome everybody! Thank you for coming and thanks for celebrating Youngblood going number 1 in Australia with us!” Calum was interrupted as everyone started cheering. “We are about to start our cruise so drink up and get fucked up!” Calum rose his glass in the air and everyone did the same except for you. You were fucked up alright. You walked quickly to the bathroom as the music returned loudly through the yacht.

Closing the door behind you, you placed your mimosa on the counter and stared at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes were puffy and red as tears streamed down your face, snot coming out of your nose and your lips were all red puffy too as you continued to cry.

This is what you and Luke had come to. It seemed to be some fucked up graph where Luke was exponentially rising as you were the opposite end, going down. You had given your all and still did so, Luke gave his all too but just not to you. To his career. You couldn’t hate him for that, but before your feelings turned into hate you needed to do what was the best for you and Luke’s relationship. It was time to end it. Before it became messy and you did start resenting each other; Luke hating you for leading him on once you realised you were done and you hating Luke for not being as committed as you were.

“Happy fucking anniversary,” you said to yourself quietly, sculling down your champagne drink and then washing your face. You dabbed tissues under your eyes so as not to smudge your mascara any more and then reapplied your liquid lipstick. You blinked a couple of times, widening your eyes and pretending to sneeze. It’s what you would do once you left the bathroom, to make it look like you hadn’t been crying but were just sneezing a lot and that’s why your eyes were all red and puffy and watery. With a final look at yourself in the mirror you grabbed your empty glass and opened the bathroom door, facing Luke.

He was leant up against the door, a frown on his face. Shocked, you closed the door immediately, locking it.

“Y/N, open the door,” Luke said and you shook your head even though he couldn’t see you. “Y/N, I can hear you crying through the door,” Luke said quietly and you covered your eyes, full sobs coming from your body. You thought you had composed yourself, you thought you had it all figured out. You were ready to leave. But then you saw Luke, his beautiful blue eyes so concerned, and now you weren’t so sure. “I’ve been so worried about you lately baby,” Luke continued to talk as you continued to cry on the opposite side of the door. “You’ve seemed distant and I don’t know what to do.” At this you frowned. You seemed distant? What about when he just blew you off in front of all those people?

You opened the door and Luke immediately stepped inside. You closed the door behind you, locking it and facing it instead of Luke for a second to gather your thoughts. You felt Luke’s hands brush your hair off your shoulder, his fingers making goose-bumps raise on your skin. You shoved his hand off as you turned around to face him. It wasn’t fair that he could still have that affect on you when he touched you.

“You really can’t say that I’ve been distant,” you said angrily, wiping the tears off your face and pushing Luke’s hands away as he tried to help you. He frowned.

“I’m sorry about before,” Luke said and you rolled your eyes.

“You’re not though. I get it, you’re busy. I’m happy for you, I really am. But there’s only so much I can give to you before I start getting tired Luke of receiving nothing back. You’re always busy. You’re always rehearsing, always with producers, always with everyone. Whatever, it’s great you’re doing so well. But I need something, anything Luke. You can’t always blow me off like that. Even just a fucking kiss would have been nice. It’s so hard being lonely,” your voice was slowly starting to get louder as you threw your hands up in the air, running them through your hair in frustration. Luke stepped forward, leaning down and you immediately raised your hands to his chest, stopping him. “What’re you doing?” You asked, the frown coming back to Luke’s forehead as he reached his hands out to touch you.

“Why won’t you let me touch you? I’m trying, Y/N. I’m trying to give you what you want. We’re okay, baby,” he leant down again and you pushed him a little harder, tears returning to your eyes.

“What I want? No, Luke, that’s not how this works. You’re supposed to want to want me, to want to be happy with me. Not just because it’s what I ‘want’. You think this is what okay looks like?” You raised an eyebrow. You wiped away the tears that had returned as you turned to walk out of the bathroom. Luke grabbed your wrist, his eyes wide.

“Don’t, Y/N. What’re you doing? What do you mean?” He asked, his blue eyes searching your face, full of concern and confusion and hurt. Your heart didn’t feel small anymore. It felt heavy; you were suffocating. It was weighing you down; you were weighing Luke down. He was weighing you down. You sighed, looking down at his beautiful red-painted fingers covered in rings wrapped around your wrist. You wanted to tell him you were okay, that the two of you were going to be okay. But it wasn’t right. Enough was enough, it was time to stop being selfish with Luke. It was time to let him be happy without you, fully. He had already started, there was no need for you anymore. “Baby, answer the question.” Luke said quietly, squeezing your wrist. You felt the hot tears against your cheeks, your lips, falling on to your chest.

“Luke,” you said quietly, looking up at him. His eyes were wide, his mouth open slightly and a crease in his forehead where his eyebrows were knitted together. “I love you. So much. I’m not good for you though, and I’m not sure if you’re good for me. I got a promotion,” you said, watching his eyebrows raise slightly. “I’m going to be travelling, just like you. This,” you gestured between you both, “is only going to get harder. I love you, and I will always love you. But I can’t stay and you know that,” your voice was quiet as realisation sank in to both you and Luke.

You had just broken up with the boy who made your heart feel like it was three times its size. The boy who made your stomach sick full of butterflies, made your palms sweaty. Your head woozy and your lips a constant puffy red from his sweet kisses. But also, the boy who was hurting you and you him. The boy who couldn’t be there for you, the boy who didn’t understand that soon you wouldn’t be there for him either. The boy who was only ever real for a few fleeting seconds before he returned to being a distant memory, just a photo on your lock-screen the only proof that what you had was real. Or had been real.

Luke was silent as you raised your wrist, free from his hold, and turned to leave. You grabbed your purse, remembering something. You opened it, pulling out the silver necklace you had bought your then boyfriend. It was still nice, still relevant if he ever decided he’d still want to be your friend. It was his, just like your heart, always.

“Happy anniversary Luke,” you smiled a small smile even though you were crying and placed the necklace in his hand. “Congratulations, I hope you get everything you want. If you can ever forgive me, you can call me if you ever want a friend to talk to. I love you.” You squeezed his hand before you left the bathroom.

You had just enough time to leave before the yacht would depart, so you rushed off the boat without another look back to the blue eyed boy who was forever yours in your heart. Who you would always love. Who would always have your heart no matter what. He had never discarded it; he had just been neglecting it. You realised that now as you practically ran off the yacht.

It was just a shame that you left too quickly, too quickly before Luke could tell you that he was always yours, and you were always his. His heart belonged to you, just as much as yours belonged to him.

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thisbibliomaniac · 6 years

Note

Answer all the flower asks binchh

lavender; soundcloud or vinyls?No idea lol primrose; what book does everyone right now need to read?The Help lunar mist; do you like wearing other people’s shirts/jackets?Nope bird of paradise; what was the best thing that happened to you this month?Bought a lot of books with @dangeously-human!gardenia; what’s a promise you’ve recently made to yourself?D:lion’s fairytale; would you rather be the sky, the ocean or the forests?Skywhirling butterflies; would you kiss the last person you kissed again?That would be Obi, and yes marmalade skies; do you plan your outfits?Yep apricot drift; how do you feel right now?Tired XD everlasting daisy; what’s the last dream you remember having?I don't remember! queen’s cup; what are you craving right now?¯\_(ツ)_/¯ lavender dream; turn ons/offs?Swearing is a huge turn off water lilly; when was the last time you cried? why?Uhhh probably watching the office lily of the valley; did the one person who hurt you most in your life apologize? No winterberry; do you bite or lick your ice cream?Bite honey perfume; favorite movie ever?Cinderella 1997desert rose; do you like yourself?Sure snapdragon; have you ever met or seen in person a celebrity?Mark Schultz night owl; how many countries have you visited?One heliotrope; have you ever been in a castle?Yes! creams and sky; what’s the craziest/bravest thing you’ve done?Oh goodness I don't know like lantana; what’s on your mind right now? Literally nothing. pumpkin patch; what’s your zodiac sign?💲tulip; name 5 facts about yourself.D: I c ant think of five daphne; do you believe in karma?Noqueen of the meadow; ever been in love?Nowisteria; whom do you admire and why?a.dwered angel’s face; what was your favorite bedtime story as a child?Cinderella remember me; did you make someone laugh today?I think so iris; do you believe in ghosts?Nolilac; if you could go back in time which time period would you visit?Ancient Egypt caramel kisses; would you want to live forever? why/why not?Definitely not primula; what makes you sad?Things rain lily; was today typical? why/why not?It was not! It was good queen anne’s lace; who do you trust the most?Alex trebek lady’s slipper; what did you have for breakfast today?Nada forget me not; do you have any regrets looking back in your life?Sure lunaria; what’s your favorite fictional universe?Mcu violet; favorite tv show?The office sunflower; share a favorite quote.The eye is always caught by light, but shadows have more to say snowdrop; what does your ideal day look like?Totally unscheduled , good weather tiger lily; do you have any hobbies?So many peony; share a small random book passage that means something to you.Ehhhtea rose; what’s something you always wanted to do but were too scared?¯\_(ツ)_/¯ honeysuckle; do you usually date people your age or older/younger?I don't usually date anyone 😂 sweet pea; who means the world to you? why?Obi wan love in the mist; best books you’ve ever read?A lot of them foxglove; who is your favorite cartoon character?Cinderella magnolia; coffee or tea?Teacrown imperial; would you rather be extremely rich or extremely loved?Rich snowflake; are you a dog or a cat person?Catbell flower; what is your biggest addiction?Craft supplies cosmos; do you ever think about the galaxy?I guess? moonflower; what’s your favorite color?Link freesia; do you have a good relationship with your parents and siblings? why/why not?Sort of sundrop; are you a morning or a night person?Night poppy; have you ever dealt with a mental illness?¯\_(ツ)_/¯ clover; how would your friends describe you?D: dandelion; do you consider yourself and extrovert or an introvert?Introvert lilly; what’s something you love watching/reading but you are too embarrassed to admit you do?So this is how I'm supposed to admit to it? anemone; describe yourself in 3 words.lotus; best memory as a child?Apple picking every fall angelonia; what is your eye and hair color?Red and brown dahlia; do you like crystals?Sure buttercup; if you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?Tea would be available as often as coffee baby’s breath; what’s your hogwarts house?Ravenclaw leaning towards Slytherin calendula; biggest pet peeve?Snoring in movie theaters blanker flower; would you rather go to a cocktail party with your best friends or stay home and read a book/watch a movie with your pet?Depends on the night ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ blazing star; share a secret.I don't think I have any secrets tbh carnation; would you rather live longer or happier?Happier petunia; who’s story is your biggest inspiration in life? why?Jane Grey, Elisabeth Elliott, and Corrie Ten Boom bluebell; do you wear glasses?When I need to nymphea; forest or river?River orchid; do you like exercise?Yes pansy; do you like poetry?Noooo

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tmarie82 · 6 years

Text

Together

Pairing: Damien x MC (Camille Park)

Book: Perfect Match

Word Count: ~1,100

Rating: PG (pure angsty fluff)

Author’s Note: Like so many in the fandom, I was completely devastated after that horrendous cliffhanger finale in Perfect Match yesterday. And I seriously needed some resolution in order to be able to move on. So this little story is something I had to do to help myself cope, and hopefully it will bring some peace to others as well.

Caveat - the entire first section is completely from the book and the storyline belongs entirely to Pixelberry. I take no credit, I just needed to borrow it to set the stage.

Please let me know if you would like to be added to my tag list. You can find all of my fics here - MASTERLIST

~~~~~~~~~~

“Look how beautiful everything is ... how big. There is just so much out there in the world. It’s amazing.” You admire the vastness of the painting, the feeling of being both infinitely alone while also a part of something bigger than yourself. You turn your head to Damien and observe him staring expressionless at the painting. “What does it make you feel?”

He considers the painting, his eyes roaming the image in contemplation. “The way it makes me feel is just ... indescribable.”

You feel your heart skip a beat at his last word ... indescribable. “What did you just say?”

...

The chilled air brushes across your cheek, in stark contrast to the warmth of Damien’s lips against yours. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you closer, his strong grasp holding you tight as if he could never let you go. Your mouths and tongues dance until you surface, breathless, to gaze up into his eyes. From the corners of your vision you can see the City of Light surrounding you from all directions, glowing and twinkling from the streets below.

“What do you say we take this back to the hotel?” He says in a low, husky tone that makes you tingle down to your core.

“No. I want you here. Now.” You state in a seductive whisper, your voice laced with lust and demand.

Damien looks a little stunned at your request, pulling back to peer deeper into your eyes. “But ... here?” His brow furrows in consideration and his lips curl down into a pout. Then his mouth twitches on one side.

“Why not? Don’t you want to?” You tease playfully, standing up on your tiptoes to press your mouth to his again. As you make contact, you feel a slight shock against your lips and jump back in alarm.

“What the ...?” You massage the sting on your sensitive skin, then look back up to him to see him motionless with the same expression on his face. Brows furrowed, lips curled down in a pout ... twitching on side. “Damien?” You cup your hand to his cheek, your digits burying themselves in his flesh ... his rubbery, pliable flesh. Your hand retracts in alarm. But as you move away your fingertips pull the skin-like material with them, exposing a skeleton-like maze of metal.

...

“AHHHHHHHH!” You jolt up with a scream, fists gripping the sheets tightly as if you’re holding on for dear life. You feel hot and clammy all over, your nightgown clinging to your back and the sheets sticking to your legs. You try to calm your breathing as you take in your surroundings ...

You’re in your room. In your apartment in New York. You sweep your hand across the bed beside you, only to find the sheets cold and his side empty. You glance at the clock on the nightstand; 3:12am. Your heart breaks a little more knowing he still isn’t sleeping well either.

You swing your legs over the side of the bed, a chill running up your spine as the cool air tickles the beads of sweat across the back of your neck. You grab your baggy sweatshirt and pull it over your head before walking down the hallway to the kitchen.

Damien is sitting at the table, his head in his hands and a glass of rum next to a half empty bottle in front of him. You pause in the dark hallway, hidden in the shadows as you watch him for a moment. He sits in silent reflection, eventually picking up the glass and taking a long swig. He pulls it away from his lips, observing the contents as he swirls the liquid in circular motions in front of his face and then drains the remains in one chug. He sets the tumbler down delicately on the surface and reaches for the bottle to pour himself another glass.

You step out into the light and place one hand on his shoulder, but he doesn’t look up. “Couldn’t sleep again?”

He shakes his head while his eyes stay focused in front of him. “You?”

“Same.” You pull out the chair beside him and sit, resting your hand on top of his on the table. “I had that same dream again ... “ but you stop yourself, not wanting to relive it again. You pick up his glass and take a draw from it, hoping it will help chase the nightmares away. “You want to talk about it?”

He finally raises his eyes to meet your stare, his face displaying all the exhaustion and sadness lurking beneath the surface. “I’ve already told you everything that happened. It doesn’t change anything.” He sighs deeply. “I just wish we could put this whole thing behind us. Move on with our lives to happier times. Make new memories ...” He looked back down at your hand on his, stroking his thumb over your skin.

“I know, D. I wish for that too.” Your voice falters as your eyes fill with tears. “But first we have to deal with Eros. Together.” His gaze meets yours again, a single tear falling from the corner of his eye. “Together, right?” you plead, brushing away the tear with a gentle swipe of your thumb.

“Yes.” He reaches his other hand up to cup your palm against his lips in a soft kiss before holding it against his cheek. “When I woke up in that dark cell, I was confused and alone. And I thought you were hurt, or worse ... I thought that I had failed you.” He exhaled deeply, staring deeply into your eyes. “And I never want to feel that way again. I never want to lose you again. So from now on, it’s you and me, together ... no matter what.” A faint, reassuring smile surfaces on his lips.

You can’t fight back the tears any longer, streaming down your face freely as you lean forward and pull his face to meet yours in a deep kiss. The world fades away, it’s only you and him, the salty taste of your tears mixed with the rum on his tongue. And for a moment you forget that you were ever apart, ever scared, ever in danger ...

You pull apart and Damien brushes the tears from your face, a look of love and devotion in his eyes. “We should probably try to get some sleep.”

You nod in response. “Are you coming too? Come lay with me?”

He smiles thoughtfully, then grasps your hand as he stands and pulls you with him. “Of course. Together, Cami.” You follow him, your petite hand enclosed in his large one, down the hallway to your room. You lay down beside him on the bed, his arms wrapped around you as he nuzzles his face against your neck. You hear his breathing slow and his body relax as he gradually falls asleep.

You lie awake for a while, your mind still wandering. You reflect upon the events over the past few months and say a silent prayer of thanks that the universe has brought this man back to you. The real Damien, flesh and blood ... holding you close, by your side. Your friend, your love, your partner. And for the first time in a while, you feel hopeful for what the future has in store.

END

~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @simplyaiden-blog @mfackenthal @lizeboredom @walkerismychoice @boneandfur @laniquelove @choices-fanatic @diamond-dreamland @mariamatsuo @the-everlasting-dream @mrs-walker-nazario-levine @kamybelen-blog @butindeed @enmchoices @drakelover78 @kamilah-sayeed-xoxo @parkerattano @asprankle @innerpostmentality @jadedpixiescribbles @crookedslimecreatorpasta @choiceswreckedme @debramcg1106 @mymandrake @alesana45

#i needed to write this for me #damien x mc #damien nazario #perfect match #tmarie82 fanfic

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pinkamour1588 · 6 years

Note

Oh please a need the A-Z headcanons with mckirk(your hc give me life)

A = Attractive what do they find attractive about the other?

(Besides personality, because they do obviously find each other’s personalities attractive. And the list of nonphysical things is quite long.)

Len is quite fond of Jim’s eyes…and his ass. He thinks Jim has a nice ass. Jim’s toned body is a nice bonus as well.

Jim, much to Len’s surprise, likes the little bit of squish that Len has on his stomach. He’s a bit of a fan of the scruff that Len grows sometimes when they’re on leave. And, like Len for him, Jim likes Len’s eyes.

B = Baby do they want a family? why/why not?

Technically, they do. Len has Joanna, though she lives with Len’s sister. If they were not fully dedicated to their careers and were not living on a starship, they would likely have kids together. Len always wanted kids and, for Jim, it wasn’t until Joanna came into his life that he really considered being a parent to someone. So, they’re happy either way.

C = Cuddle how do they cuddle?

Jim clings to Len. Like, head on Len’s chest and holding onto him. They also cuddle through spooning, either Len curled around Jim or Jim curled around him.

D = Dates what are dates with them like?

Casual most of the time. On the rare occasion they will go out somewhere nice, but a dinner or lunch at a diner or a night in watching movies or one of them cooking a nice dinner for the two of them are all very common.

E = Everything you are my ____ (e.g my life, my world…)

Len to Jim: “You are my idiot. (and I love you.)”

Jim to Len: “You are my grumpy boyfriend/fiancé/husband. (and I love you)”

F = Feelings when did they know they were falling in love?

Jim knew when he started thinking about Len more and not just in the “my best friend” way (before they were dating). Then (after they started dating) it was when he realized that he was the happiest he’d been with a partner ever.

Len knew after he was in too deep. It was a situation of the two of them sitting together talking and laughing and Len just looked at Jim and it hit him like a ton of bricks. Scared the hell out of him. As he processed it more, he realized that Jim made him happier with a partner than he had been in a long time.

G = Gentle are they gentle? If so, how?

Absolutely. If one of them is upset, the other will comfort them in the best way they can. Jim’s a bit like a cat sometimes in the sense he likes when someone “pets” him (aka, he likes when someone plays with his hair), so Len is gentle when he does that. (To be honest, I’m not 100% sure how to answer this question. I’m not really sure what exactly it’s asking.)

H = Hand/Hold how do they like to hold? how do they like to hold hands?

The normal way? Like it depends on the situation as to if they have their fingers interlaced or not.

I = Impression first impression/s

Len’s of Jim: “There’s something up with this kid. He looks like he got in a fight.”

Jim’s of Len: “This guy is fucking crazy. Who joins Starfleet if they have aviophobia?”

J = Joker are they into pulling pranks?

Jim kinda is, and he’ll pull the really minor pranks (I’m talking like the stupid, cheesy pranks) or mess with Len on the rare occasion. However, Len isn’t really a fan of pranks. He’s not one to play them and he’s not really a fan of being on the receiving end of them.

K = Kisses how do they kiss?

Like hand holding, the normal way? It depends on the situation. It can range from a quick peck on the cheek to hot and heavy making out.

L = Little things what little things do they love/notice?

Jim loves when Len makes pancakes, the little bit of squish on Len’s stomach, Len’s sense of humor, how great a dad Len is, how caring Len is.

Len loves how excited Jim gets about things, how interested Jim is in everything, the fact Jim actually remembers the most random dates (like their first date, their anniversary, Len’s mama’s birthday, Len’s dad’s birthday even though Jim never met David, etc), how much Jim genuinely loves Joanna and that Jim thought the fact he loves Jo is the most obvious thing. (In other words, Jim never thought twice about loving her. It just made sense. She’s Len’s daughter. He loves Len and by extension, he loves her.)

M = Memory their favorite moment together

I don’t think they have only one. They’re both fond of the memory of the first time Jim met Len’s family in person as Len’s boyfriend. After they get married, that’s one of their favorite memories together.

N = Nickel do they spoil? do they buy the person they love everything?

No, not really. Like, Jim’s more inclined toward the “I saw this at the store and thought of you so I bought it” but it is something they both do. When they buy each other gifts, they tend to buy very nice things.

O = Orange what color reminds them of their other half

Blue reminds Len of Jim, for the obvious reason of that being Jim’s eye color. Green reminds Jim of Len because that’s Len’s favorite color.

P = Petnames what petnames do they use?

They both use sweetheart. Jim calls Len “babe”, and once called him “baby” before Len asked him to never call him that again because it reminds him of his ex. He also obviously calls Len “Bones.” Jim will occasionally start using the super sappy and obnoxious pet names has a joke. Len alternates between “sugar” and “darlin’” for Jim, but it’s usually “sugar”. Len is also one of the very few people who Jim allows to call him “Jimmy”.

Q = Questions what are the questions they’re always asking?

The normal ones? Like “How was your day?” and “What do you want for dinner?”

Len often asks “why?” and “how?” a lot in regards to Jim. For example, “why did you think doing that on the mission was a good idea? You have just landed yourself in medbay for a few hours.” And “How did you rip your shirt again?”

R = Remember their favorite memory of each other

Um…Probably the same as their favorite moment together.

S = Sad how do they cheer themselves/each other up

Len cheers Jim up by holding and cuddling him and playing with his hair. If/When Jim wants to talk about what’s upsetting him, Len’s there to listen.

Jim cheers Len up by letting him have his silence and space. Jim’s never too far away and is ready to listen when Len’s ready to talk.

T = Talking what do they love to talk about?

I’ll preface it by saying, they talk about a lot of things but not all of them make the “favorites” category of topics. They love talking about Joanna and the rest of their families, things they’ve read recently, exciting things that have happened, etc.

U = Universe use a metaphor, what are they to each other? (e.g he was the universe, ever-changing and mysterious)

The only thing I can come up with is that they’re each other’s lobster (cause FRIENDS reference ftw…and I think I suck at coming up with metaphors for this stuff)

V = Very ___ they’re thoughts about each other (e.g she’s very smart, he’s very stubborn, they’re very annoying etc.)

Len thinks Jim is intelligent, impulsive, stubborn (and a little annoying at times).

Jim thinks Len is caring, smart, and patient (and a little grumpy sometimes).

W = Why reasons why they love each other

Specific reasons is a very long list. Overall, it’s that they’re best friends. That is the basis of their relationship. They’re there for each other through the shitty times and the amazing times.

X = Xylophone What’s their song?

“Can’t Help Falling In Love” by Elvis Presley

Y = You the ___ to my ___ (e.g the cookies to my milk, the macaroni to my cheese)

Len to Jim: “You are the pain to my ass.” (Not the most romantic thing, but he would say it to Jim)

Jim to Len: “The sunshine to my moon.”

Z = Zebra if they wanted a pet, what pet would they get?

A dog. Probably a lab or golden retriever…or mutt.

#mckirk #kirk x mccoy #mccoy x kirk #leonard mccoy x jim kirk #jim kirk x leonard mccoy #mckirk headcanon #star trek headcanon #hc #mckirk hc #amanda writes

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marypoppinswasmyfatherbitches · 6 years

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Oh my goodness, I didnt see the link to your fanfic account! I am dumb. So ignore my previous ask and instead answer this one for the meme. 13, 3, 14, 1 and 2 for Happiness goes on? (I shall leave reviews on your beautiful fanfic soon I promise, they are good.)

(Hiii, sooo…this whole reply is late because I actually typed up ALL OF THIS last night, and then accidentally “x”-ed out of my browser and lost it all, because I am very very stupid. And then was too tired to retype it up before going to sleep. I hope I remember roughly everything, and apologies for that mistake.)

Oh! Haha! Alright then! Thank you! Don’t feel dumb at all for not realizing which AO3 account is mine or for your previous ask(which for others who are curious, said: “1 - 5 for all your fics! Just talk about your favs!”). I was prepared to choose 3 fics (including “Happiness Goes On” since that’s definitely the one I’m most proud of, so I guess that’s closest to a “favorite” right?), and go through the first 5 questions for each, though I won’t lie and say it wouldn’t have taken some time to answer.

BUUUT…since you said to scrap that first ask, I’ll answer these individual ones for “Happiness Goes On.” And your compliment and promise for a future review means SO goddamn much, thank you sincerely.

(WARNING / REMINDER: This is about my fic that deals with the subject of child molestation, and I do reference that a little bit in this reply. Don’t read further if it makes you uncomfortable, which I entirely understand and respect.)

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13: What music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? Or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

HA! Well, American Pie obviously, for a majority of it. While brainstorming / writing / editing the epilogue? A lotta Billy Joel. ;)

The idea to use American Pie bounced into my brain when it came on the radio at the thrift shop where I volunteer, one of the rare times my own music speaker battery died. Usually a disaster, because our store radio is pretty crappy, but the sound quality wasn’t too bad that day, and I rediscovered how much I love that song and ‘Why isn’t this on my ipod again?’. Listening to the lyrics, I realized how much some of them fit the Guardians in general, and this story specifically, which I have Gamora mentally note in the fic. I was sitting and casually chatting with the manager while also thinking, ‘Google what year this came out when you get home, but I’m sure it’s the 70′s. Peter would know it, and it could be the Zune. I think it could work.’ I’m proud that I was able to reference the song so many times without actually naming it by title, but I assume most readers knew what it was, it’s just that famous. (I also couldn’t resist the light-hearted joke, later when things calmed down, of Gamora saying “This…is the longest song…I have ever heard.” and Peter smiling without even looking at her and giving a cheeky “I know.”)

In terms of using Billy Joel for the epilogue, I’m just a Billy Joel fanatic. The use of him for this story began just from the We Didn’t Start the Fire joke toward Rocket at the bar (I thought it was clever, Peter!), and later on I saw how The Longest Time fit romantically for Starmora, and some of the lyrics matched the healing themes of the overall story, and I thought ‘Maybe they’ve been playing BIlly Joel since that night; maybe that can be the joke.’ Why shouldn’t his Greatest Hits albums (at least) be on the Zune? I struggled a lot over what song should be the final one Gamora comments on before they switch artists to appease the group. I never specify which romantic Billy Joel song Peter and Gamora slow danced to during their “date night” in that six-week summary, but I like to imagine it was Just the Way You Are. I considered Keeping the Faith or Vienna for the final one, but I thought they deserved something more fun and naughty to analyze this time, so Only the Good Die Young it is. :D

In conclusion, I listened to The Longest Time, and the entire An Innocent Man studio album, a lot (as if I needed an excuse).3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

The portion in italics is my favorite line, but I’m including the entire sentence for context purposes: “She would need to grow used to him viewing Yondu as a caring parent who was extraordinarily protective of his boy, and would have hunted down this pervert to whistle a glowing arrow through her skull.”14: Is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?

Ohh geez, wow, that one is tough. I don’t know if it’s accurate to say this story was intended to educate, but just to explore the idea with fictional characters. I have no expertise on the subject, and would never claim such, or talk down to those who do. I didn’t intend to create a PSA. I suppose all of the “lessons” for Peter (if they can be called that) I hope all readers already know and agree on (basically a collection of “it wasn’t your fault” and “this doesn’t define you” and “trauma isn’t a competition, someone else suffering worse doesn’t invalidate your experience” and “you should feel comfortable talking about anything without judgement or shame” etc.).

Slightly lesser scale messages, there’s also reminders about the importance of communication, trusting each other, letting the other person speak in an argument, not letting one’s jealousy/instincts/bad mood interfere with fairness, not running away from a fight or staying angry, respecting boundaries and privacy, all that healthy relationship jazz that these two are still figuring out. 1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

This post is already very long, and I could probably talk for hours about the decision-making process for many scenes (of my GotG fics, this took the longest to write and publish, over 2 months), so I’ll try to condense this to a few bullet points that probably don’t fit the “inspired” criteria.

- It was originally going to be in two parts, 4 scenes each, when I thought the epilogue would be much shorter. But as the lil’ wrap-up got longer (because we needed a fluffy conclusion, dammit!), I decided to make it a separate “chapter.”

- I think the concept probably started as one of those strange, angsty “what if?” scenarios I make up in my head at night that I still can’t believe I created into a full-fledged work. I liked the idea of Peter and Gamora having this conversation and her comforting him, but I knew if I was really going to throw it out there for other fans, it had be more balanced with happier moments, too. I just know I was always going to make the offender a woman - both because it would lead to the misunderstanding that she was a past consensual hook-up when Peter was an adult to spark some irritation and jealousy in Gamora, and because it’s realistically different from other sexual assault stories, since women can be pedophiles and child predators too, and they’re just as horrible. :(

- The fanfic idea of “Gamora accidentally starts a fire while trying to cook, and Peter falsely accuses and lashes out at Rocket” was in my head before, but there were two key differences. 1) It was the entire plot, not a light-hearted subplot in the shadows of something bigger, 2) Meredith’s letter was either fully or partially burnt as a result of the fire. By the end Gamora was going to confess it was her fault, that she was trying to surprise Peter by cooking spaghetti, and he would apologize both to her and to Rocket for losing his temper and getting so angry. I hated that idea later and found it too sad (he’s already lost the Walkman and second cassette tape, why would I want him to lose even more from his mother?), and in “Spark My Memory” (the Christmas fic I wrote for “12 Days of Starmora”) the Guardians put his mother’s letter in the photo album gift for Peter, completely safe and unharmed. I like to keep all my fanfics canon-compliant and non-contradictory from each other, so the letter is fine, no burning it.

Yet “Gamora started a fire cooking” still seemed fun to me, as I like the idea that she’s so badass and skilled and intelligent, but failed at something so domestic and simple. Kinda cute. I was so excited to insert it into this, because I think it worked on multiple levels. It’s a driving force for the plot (the reason the team go to the restaurant and they stumble upon that particular waitress), the reason Gamora was already in a bad mood during her fight with Peter, it could be used as a metaphor/comparison for Peter’s anxiety and Gamora’s guilt, it was something for the Guardians to put at a higher priority to tease and mock Gamora for while oblivious to the main story, something for Peter to just break down into giggles over once they changed the subject (because he earned a good laugh after that heartbreaking and vulnerable childhood trauma story), an excuse to give Rocket so many funny lines, an overall silly and sitcommy-style subplot to fall back on, and a sweet “victory!” for Gamora to have (sort of?) conquered by the epilogue. ^_^2: What scene did you first put down?

This is easy. I’ve written all but one (8 out of 9) of my fanfics in order, except for “Just Like Everybody Else.” So ya, I wrote the opening scene first, Baby Groot’s magic trick lesson and Peter’s oh-so-cruel “can only be seen once” deception. I needed to ease readers (and myself) into the angst and heavy shit to follow, and that cute idea had also been in the back of my mind for a while. ^_^

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PHEW, OKAY, ALL RE-TYPED! Thank you again SO MUCH for the lovely ask and wonderful questions, your actual interest and curiosity thrilled me! You see I wasn’t kidding about the incessant babbling. :P

Thank you also for the kudos you left on AO3, and take care!~

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