#i didn't include a few things cause other posts have covered them!

[himebushou]

Buddy Daddies & Fugou Keiji Balance: Unlimited

Here are a few moments between the two series that had me thinking, "Same hat!"

Fancy Suits

What Stakeout Missions Do to a Person

Confrontations on Rooftops Ending in Death

[thedreadvampy]

Guys I am BEGGING you to mask up if you're going to counterprotest the fash. They DO take photos and they DO spread them around their networks for targeting reasons.

This is not just targeted at people who consider themselves Serious Radgy Activists, antifa or anarchists.

This is for you, your mum who's angry about people targeting your neighbours, your nan who thinks the racists are being silly, your pals from the pub.

This is for everyone. We all need to stay safe at anti-racist demos.

It can feel paranoid, but things can escalate fast and it's hard to walk back once your photo's out there. A bit of overabundant caution when it's not 100% necessary is better than looking over your shoulder for years or getting jumped unexpectedly in the pub because of a photo you didn't even know was taken.

Honestly, especially with more and more police crackdowns against protesters, this is a good habit to get into at any protest or demo where there's the slightest chance of things kicking off, with fash or with cops.

You don't have to go full black bloc, but even if you're not planning on diving into the fray, stay safe - consider:

Cover your face. Wearing a mask can also help prevent COVID in your network, but if you don't have one or don't want to wear one, cover the bottom half of your face with a snood, balaclava, scarf, etc. If you need to eat, drink, smoke or vape, turn AWAY from the front of the line and ideally duck behind a banner or another person to do it. Keep masked until you're out of line of sight of the demo.

Cover your hair, especially if it's coloured or you have an interesting haircut. I usually part my mohawk down the middle and tie it to disguise the undercut, and bundle it up at the back to disguise the length, before I put on a hat or scarf - but I'm paranoid, and a hat, a headscarf or a hood will be fine. A baseball cap is good too - the brim further obscures your face from a lot of angles.

Cover up big tattoos, or tattoos that are highly identifiable from a distance. I have an upper arm sleeve and I'm honestly still working on summer options for this, but consider long sleeves for arm pieces, a light scarf/bandana for chest/neck tattoos, long trousers or leggings for leg tattoos, and/or gloves if you have hand tattoos (often the easiest to identify cause they're rarer). Even mesh or fishnet can be ok, or in a pinch you can use plasters or draw over it with a felt tip - you don't necessarily need to hide it fully if that's too hard, but try and make it harder to recognise.

If there's an accessory you often have on you in your regular life - colourful shoes, a bag with a fun design, exciting glasses frames, favourite earrings, etc - consider swapping it out for a more generic option. You don't want to put loads of effort into covering your face then get jumped on the way to work because someone recognised your backpack!

Don't help the fash out - if you take any photos, try to avoid including people's faces or tattoos as much as possible. If you post pics on socials, give them a quick once-over and consider putting an emoji or drawing over anyone's face visible.

If you see photos of someone you know at a demo, let them know (especially if they've come from rightwing accounts). If you see one of the fash taking photos, warn people and make the effort to help others cover up if they need it.

We haven't seen fascist/white nationalist mobilisation at this scale in a long time, and most people trying to help haven't dealt with this shit before. The risk factors are different to protests you may have gone on before.

Fash do sometimes come back and target people individually outside of demos if they've marked you out as an enemy. Keep safe, keep covered, keep together.

Few additional safety/security tips:

Once you've arrived at the demo, don't go anywhere alone until you're well away from the area. Stick with a buddy or a group you feel safe with and you're less likely to be jumped. Definitely don't leave on your own.

Cops are not your friends! They've been arresting as many anti-racist activists as racist ones. so remember: no comment, no personal details, don't tell them anything, and this includes blue bib PLOs. If they tell you to do something, ask 'under what power' and if they can't demonstrate that you're legally required, don't.

Don't drink or do drugs at a demo - you're adding risk for everyone around you

If you have your phone with you, make sure it's password-locked. We all sometimes lose or drop our phones and if it gets into the wrong hands you want it to be secure.

If you don't want to risk fighting, that's ok - numbers are still super important and tbh most of us aren't super keen on throwing down. Make sure that if things do seem like they might kick off and you don't think you can defend yourself, that you're moving towards the centre of the crowd and that you're not out on your own.

Look out for each other. Step in if someone's being harassed or attacked - step in as a group so you have more backing, if possible. If you're white, even if you're not able/up for fighting, it can be helpful to be part of a human barrier around people who are more likely to be targeted (eg people of colour and people who are wearing hijab/are otherwise visibly Muslim). When you're surrounded by other people, you're way less likely to get attacked.

If the fash seem to have gone, don't immediately disperse and don't post on socials that you're leaving. Especially if you're defending a specific place, it's very easy for them to wait till you've gone and come back later - give it at least an hour after the expected fash action, ideally longer.

On the flip side, don't be the last small group of people left standing. The usual rule for higher-risk demos is 'when we leave, we leave together as one' - however, for community defence, as above, doing that too early can out the people you're defending at greater risk. However, if there's like 5 of you there when 20 fash come back, you might be screwed - unless you're confident you can handle yourself, try to make sure the counterprotest crowd doesn't fall below 10-15 people. If it does, and you haven't specifically planned for that, you should consider calling it quits and leaving together.

If you're traveling to and from a demo on public transport, keep security in mind - you and the fash may be traveling to and from the same place. As much as possible, stay with buddies. Put away any signs and try not to look like you've just come from a protest. If you feel nervous, consider taking a more roundabout route home, or hopping off the train partway and getting back on the next one.

Don't do the fash's work for them. It's tempting to repost white nationalist calls to action to warn people, but you're kind of just spreading their rhetoric along with it. Instead, keep info to places, times and groups - you don't need to include the fearmongering about immigrants!

Don't post about where you are in too much detail, for the same reason - especially hotels and refuges!!! Fash are targeting those places for a reason, and when you've gone home, the people they're targeting are still there. If you post "we're at X hotel where asylum seekers live," could the wrong person see that and think "oh, that's where the bastards live, I'll remember that"? Remember, it's people's basic safety we're here to defend! Similarly, think about how much detail you share about tactics, who told you or how they knew - on social media you're not only talking to your own side.

also Stand Up To Racism have been at the forefront of a lot of these counterprotests. there's a whole sordid history there which mean a lot of people hate them, but more immediately they're just not always the best example of practical security. Just today they called time on a demo in Newcastle before the advertised fash demos were even due to start, and they are often very free with information and with people's photos. don't take your lead from them! they're playing a role in coordinating things, but ultimately they are not prepared when it comes to keeping either activists or the communities we're protecting safe.

if in doubt, skew on the side of caution - cover up more, share less info, stay in larger groups for longer, and stay later. If you come alone, it's ok to attach yourself to the side of an existing group - they'll understand.

[punkshort]

Chapter warnings: explicit smut (I don't know how much detail I should go into without giving too much away, but let's call it porn with a sprinkling of plot), language

Chapter Fourteen

Pairing: Joel x F!Reader, pre-outbreak and post outbreak

AU (the only thing I kept was the outbreak, Joel, and Tommy's characters. Joel's backstory is different, and the way he finds Jackson is different. I may include Ellie one day, I just haven't planned that far)

Fic Summary: You worked for Joel and Tommy a few months before the outbreak. The outbreak happens, and you and Joel get stuck traveling the country and keeping each other safe. Neither of you spoke about the feelings you had for one another pre-outbreak, and in a post-apocalyptic world, it seems like survival should be your only focus. But feelings can't be ignored forever.

Fic tags: Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI), Smut, Language, Canon-Typical Violence, Alcohol Use, Age Difference (Reader is 10 years younger than Joel), slow burn, mutual pining, angst, trauma, SA referencing later but I will put a big warning on those chapters

The sun was bright as it beamed through the window, washing over your face and making you squint before you even opened your eyes. You groaned and rolled over, wondering how you had forgotten to close the curtains last night when you realized you weren't in bed, but on the couch in the living room. You cracked one eye open and looked around, spotting the wine glasses on the coffee table and the fire that had gone out long ago. Opening both eyes, you sat up and looked around the living room, then peered into the kitchen when you didn't see Joel. Looking down, you noticed he had covered you with a blanket at some point. You pushed it to the side and stood up to stretch, the side with your injury responding with a quick jolt, reminding you to take it easy.

You wandered into the kitchen looking for any sign of Joel. Anxiety set in as you wondered if he regretted last night, that maybe he was drunk, and you thought it meant more than it did. You paused at the bottom of the stairs when you heard water splashing from the bathroom off the master bedroom. He's probably just washing up.

You whipped your head around trying to remember where you put your backpacks yesterday, then spotted them in the den. You dug through your pack until you found a half-used tube of toothpaste. You squirted a glob onto your pointer finger and swished it around your teeth, cheeks and tongue as you walked to the kitchen to take a swig of water from your canteen and rinsed.

Trying to keep your nerves in check, you approached the stairs and slowly made your way up, listening as the sound of water stopped. You heard fabric rustling on the other side of the door when you entered the bedroom. The attempt at calming your nerves was a lost cause as you felt your heart hammering in your chest. You looked meekly around the bedroom, unsure what to do with yourself as he finished up. You wanted to sit on the bed, but you didn't want to look like you were just out there waiting for him to come fuck you. Finally, you decided to go into the closet where you kept some spare clothes so you could pretend to be busy folding them. You turned away from the bathroom and took one step in the direction of the closet when the door swung open.

He must have washed his hair because it was wet and slicked back. He had put a flannel on with his usual jeans, but he left the top two buttons undone on his shirt, giving you a peek at his tanned chest. Your mouth hung open as you took him in before finally meeting his heated stare.

"Hi," you murmured, the tension palpable. Joel took two long strides and grabbed your face in his hands, pulling you up to him as his lips found yours. He sighed against your mouth when he felt you return the kiss, massaging your lips on his, then granted you access when your teeth grazed his lower lip. He walked you backwards until you hit the wall of the bedroom, his tongue hungrily exploring your mouth, making you moan. He lowered his hands from your face to reach down and grip the backs of your thighs before yanking both your legs up to wrap around his waist, pinning you between him and the wall.

You squeaked in surprise and grabbed onto his broad shoulders to keep you balanced, your tongue swirling with his as one of his hands slid up your thigh to grab your ass, giving it a firm squeeze while his other hand braced himself on the wall behind you. He ground his hips into your aching core, making you break the kiss and cry out. Even through the thick fabric of your jeans, the contact sent a jolt from your cunt to your fingertips. You gasped as his mouth latched onto your neck, nipping up and down your throat followed by soft licks to soothe any pain he may have caused.

"Joel," you panted, raking your nails through his wet hair and gently over his scalp, making his eyes roll back in his head as he moaned against your neck. "Please," you begged, grinding your hips against his to try to find some relief. He removed his hand from the wall and lifted you up, turning you both around and walked the few steps to the bed, tossing you down to land on your back. He stood between your legs at the end of the bed, panting and staring down at you all sprawled out for him. You reached down to unbutton your jeans and shimmied out of them, tossing them on the floor. His gaze immediately locked onto your underwear, which were nothing special, just a pair of light blue cotton panties, but your arousal was evident by the darkness spreading at the center, making him groan loudly and palm his erection over his jeans.

You leaned back on your elbows with your knees bent and legs partially spread. His gaze flicked up from your pussy to look you in the eye. His lips were parted as his chest heaved, and his pupils were blown wide as he ran his eyes down your body again, drinking you in. Even with your shirt still on, you were beginning to feel self-conscious under his stare.

"Don't you want me?" you asked him sweetly, making him tear his eyes off your body and back onto your face. Lips still parted, he nodded eagerly, and palmed his cock again. He had yet to say a single word to you and you were growing impatient.

"Then tell me," you said, watching as he swallowed roughly, "tell me how badly you want me."

He growled as he leaned forward on the bed, placing his fists on either side of you to hold himself up, and gently pressed his lips against yours again, slowly applying more pressure to your mouth as he inched forward, pushing you to lay flat on your back as he brought his knees to rest between your legs. He released your lips and lifted his head up to look at you, taking one of his hands still fisted next to you on the bed to gently cup your face. His gaze was soft, and his eyes sparkled from the sun peeking through the curtains as he admired you. You sighed and closed your eyes, leaning into his touch.

"I've wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you," he croaked, his voice thick with emotion. You opened your eyes to meet his gaze as he continued, his thumb brushing against your cheek. "I wasted so much time, fought it for so long," he said, shaking his head, "I never thought I could feel this way again, then you showed up, talkin' back to me in that meeting in front of everyone."

He smiled at the memory, running his thumb over your soft lips.

"Couldn't get you out of my damn head, you know that?" He leaned down to give your lips a tender kiss as you whimpered at his sweet words. "Then the world went to hell, and there we were, protectin' each other, carin' for each other." You smiled up at him now, trying not to ruin the moment with tears. You placed your hand over the one he held on to your face, rubbing circles over his damaged knuckles.

"I don't think I can put into words how badly I want you, sweetheart," he whispered, pressing his forehead against yours. "But I promise you, I ain't gonna waste another second spent with you ever again."

"Joel," you rasped, desperately trying to hold back your tears as he lifted his head up, and you looked back and forth between his eyes. You snaked your hand around to the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss you, pouring all your emotions into every bite on his lip and flick of your tongue. Joel ran his hand down your side to the bottom of your shirt, pushing it up as he slid his hand up your stomach and over your ribs until he reached your bra. He tucked his fingers underneath the fabric to palm your breast gently before expertly rolling your nipple between his fingers.

You cried out at the sensation and tipped your head backwards, arching your back and pushing yourself into his hand further. He leaned back on his knees to lift your shirt over your head, followed quickly by your bra. You laid underneath him, almost completely exposed, while he was still fully clothed. You whined and pulled at the waistband of his jeans, preventing him from staring at the pink scars along your ribs.

He slid off the bed to quickly shed his jeans and flannel, leaving him in just his boxers as he crawled back on top of you, pressing his warm skin against your own. The air was making the arousal soaking through your underwear feel cold against your skin, and you shuddered. He buried his face in the crook of your neck and placed gentle nips along your collarbone. He held himself above you on one forearm next to your head while his free hand went back to cup your other breast, pinching your nipple between his fingers. You were pinned underneath him, hardly able to move, but you ran your hands up his arms, feeling his muscles twitching under your touch. Your hands landed on his shoulders, and when he gave your nipple a particularly harsh pinch, you dug your fingers into his muscles, rolling your head to the side and let out a yelp.

"Oh, I'm sorry, sweetheart," he murmured against your throat. "Let me make it feel better."

He bent his head down to latch onto the sore spot, sucking your nipple into his mouth and swirling his tongue over the tip. You moaned, threading your fingers through his drying curls. He released you from his mouth, hovering just over your breast, and gently blew across the wetness he left on your skin. The shock of going from warm to cold made your nipples harden even more, to the point where it was almost painful.

"Fuck, Joel, please," you begged him as he placed gentle kisses along your sternum. His eyes shot up to your face, taking pride in how unraveled you had become under him. Your cheeks were flushed, your lips swollen, and you were struggling to catch your breath. He hummed against your skin. He wanted to give you what you wanted, but he didn't want to rush, either.

"You're gonna have to give me a minute, sweetheart. I've been waitin' a long time for this." he said, sighing as his fingers danced around your ribs. He froze when he felt the shiny, uneven skin of your scars from when you were stabbed. Stabbed when you saved his life.

He lifted his head to get a better look at the injury, gently running his fingers along the edges, marveling at the way goosebumps raised immediately from your skin. He leaned down to press a soft kiss along each of the scars you carried, murmuring to himself after each one.

"What did you say?" you panted, struggling to focus on anything other than his touch.

He ran the tip of his nose over the scars before answering.

"I'm so proud of you, you're so brave and beautiful," he whispered. "I'd do anythin' to keep you safe."

You groaned, wondering if it was possible to have an orgasm from just words alone. You beamed from the praise and lifted your hips up to try to find friction, your cunt pulsing with need. Joel noticed the movement and glanced down between you, deciding to finally give in.

He rolled off you to lay on his side, then wrapped his fingers around the edges of your underwear, tugging them down to your ankles, where you kicked them off the rest of the way. He eagerly climbed back over you and nudged your knees open wider so he could kneel between them. He sat back on his heels and, using his thumbs, pulled open your folds. His jaw hung open, and with a long, drawn-out groan, dragged his eyes back up to yours.

"This all for me?" He drawled, his cock throbbing in his boxers. All you could do was nod, your chest heaving in anticipation. "You're soaked, fuckin' hell, you poor thing," he said, looking back down at your dripping cunt. "D'you want me to take care of you?" he asked lowly, his eyes a darker shade of brown you've never seen on him before. You nodded again, still gasping for air. He reached his bandaged hand up and lightly gripped the underside of your chin.

"Tell me," he growled your previous words back to you, as he struggled to restrain himself from just sliding inside you right away. He wanted to make it last, wanted to make you feel good. He wanted it to mean something.

"I need you," you gasped, your fingers gripping the sheets so tightly that your knuckles were turning white. "Please, baby, I'm gonna explode if - oh!" Your back arched off the mattress and your head tilted back, mouth agape when he finally slid a thick finger inside you.

"'Baby?'" Joel panted, "Oh, I like that."

You let out a filthy moan as he set a steady pace, plunging his finger in and out, his thumb brushing against your clit teasingly before he slid a second finger inside. You bent your knees as you rocked your hips along with his thrusts, his eyes never leaving your face as he watched you come undone. With his thumb, he pressed down on your clit, swirling it around slowly as he watched your pleasure building, your gasps for air became harsher, and your moans morphing into cries.

He leaned forward on his free hand, his fist pushing into the mattress next to you, as his other hand picked up the pace inside your cunt. His jaw was slack, and his eyes were glazed over as he watched your face contort in pleasure, your eyes squeezed shut, your lower lip trapped in your teeth, moaning his name. When he pressed onto your clit a little harder and began wiggling his thumb side to side, it set something off. You gripped his wrist that was next to you on the bed and your eyes snapped open, finally looking up at him.

"Joel," you panted, "J-Joel, I'm gonna, fuck, please," you begged, "please d-don't stop."

"You're doin' so good for me, sweetheart," he murmured, "I love watchin' you like this. I can't wait to feel this tight pussy around my cock, but I need you to come for me first," you felt the coil in your stomach about to snap and you did your best to keep your eyes open. When he said, "That's it, let go... come for me," your body stilled as you gasped, your vision went fuzzy and you covered your mouth with the back of your hand, biting down.

Joel removed his fingers and leaned down to plant a small kiss on your forehead, then your nose, and removed your hand so he could press his lips against yours before resting your foreheads together, waiting until you caught your breath and came back down to earth. You stared up at him lazily, trailing a finger over his shoulder and across his collarbone, noticing for the first time he was covered in a thin sheen of sweat. You looked back at his face as he smiled down at you, but you could see the restraint behind his eyes, desperately trying to give you time to recover, but he was struggling.

You reached down between you and slid your hand inside his boxers, brushing up against the tip of his cock. You made your way down to the base and wrapped him in your hand. He hissed and his eyes fluttered closed as you began to work him up and down, gathering his precum with each stroke.

"Do you like that?" you asked him quietly, twisting your wrist back and forth now as you pumped him up and down, his breath growing erratic and the arm that supported him began to shake.

"Yes," he rasped. His forehead rested on your shoulder so you could feel the tickle of his exhale on your neck. "But you gotta stop, or else this'll be over before it began."

You let out a low chuckle but did as you were told. Once you let him go, you hooked your fingers on the waistband of his boxers and pulled them down as far as you could reach. He lifted his forehead off your shoulder so he could fling them into the corner of the room, then settled back over you again, leaning down to give you a quick kiss as his knees nudged your inner thigh. You opened your legs up wider so he could settle his hips in between, his heavy cock pressed between you both, the length of him sliding between your folds as his hips gently rocked back and forth.

A deep groan rumbled in his chest as he felt your slick coating him. He was rubbing against your clit, and it was driving you crazy, already feeling the start of another orgasm building.

"Joel, please, I need you," you whispered against his mouth. He lifted his hips up and with his fist, lined himself up, the tip of his cock gently prodding at your entrance a few times before he pushed himself inside your aching heat.

"Oh, fuck," you moaned as he inched further inside you, stretching you out. He tried to go slow, but he couldn't hold back any longer. He buried himself inside you with one quick motion, making you both cry out. He gave you a minute to adjust before he leaned forward and rested his head back on your shoulder, rocking slowly into you as you raked your fingers through his hair.

"You're so warm, so beautiful," he murmured with his eyes closed. "You feel so good," his hand came down to squeeze the meaty part of your hip as he continued his steady pace. He didn't want to rush, he wanted to savor every moment with you. You bit your lip and lightly scratched your nails down his back, enjoying the feeling of him filling you up.

Joel lifted his head from your shoulder to press his lips against yours before peppering your jaw and sucking on the pulse point in your neck. You groaned as he lifted one of your knees up and pressed it against your chest, sliding out of you slowly before snapping his hips into yours, making you see stars. He created the perfect angle to hit your sweet spot when he brought your knee up, and it was dizzying.

He continued down your neck as his pace increased, leaving small bites along your collarbone. All you could hear was your skin slapping together and his quiet grunts that accompanied each thrust. You could feel your orgasm building in your lower abdomen, the familiar tension brewing as his pubic bone made direct contact with your clit each time he fucked into you.

"Joel," you whined, trying to warn him you were close.

"Keep takin' it," he grunted into your neck. "Just like that."

You squeezed your eyes shut trying to stave off your orgasm, but the noises he was making and the spot he was hitting inside was too much. You arched off the bed with a sob, digging your nails into his back. Your lips and fingers felt numb as your second orgasm washed over you, then finally you relaxed into the mattress. Joel sped up now, burying himself into you at a ruthless pace. He lifted his mouth from your neck and met your gaze.

"Tell me," he croaked again, his hair a mess and his face flush. "Tell me you're mine."

"I'm yours, Joel," you whimpered. You were becoming sore and overstimulated as he pounded into you, but you kept talking. "I'm yours. I've been yours since we met," you continued as his thrusts became sloppy and his jaw clenched, focused on your words. "I wish you fucked me on the table in the conference room that night."

That sent him over the edge, pulling out at the last minute with a guttural moan and spurting hot ropes of cum all over your inner thighs.

Joel had to fight to keep himself from collapsing on top of you, instead rolling himself to the side at the last minute, gasping for air. He wrapped his arm around your waist and tugged you into him, planting small kisses on your temple and eyelids as you hummed, trying to collect yourself after two back-to-back orgasms. You finally opened your eyes and looked at him, his neck still splotched with red from the exertion and the sweat drying on his forehead. You couldn't help yourself. You reached your hand up to grasp the back of his head and brought him down for a burning kiss, running your tongue along his with a groan.

He sighed against your mouth before forcing himself to stand. He went to the bathroom to wet a rag and brought it back, gingerly cleaning up your thighs as you laid spread out before him. Your spent cunt was all he could focus on for a minute before he cleaned up the mess between your legs, taking a moment to admire his handiwork, then dropped the rag in the sink before sliding back beside you in bed.

"We should probably get up," you said to him, your eyes still closed. "You need to find a car battery."

"Batteries aren't goin' anywhere," he murmured, tightening his grip on your waist in case you were going to try to get up and start the day.

You laid there for a while, unsure if he had fallen asleep or not, but you felt so relaxed you weren't sure yourself if you were drifting in and out. You rubbed circles with your thumb along the back of his hand that clutched your waist and watched the sunlight dance along the walls of the bedroom. For the first time in a long time, you felt at peace.

"You’re right, that was worth the wait," you whispered. His face was buried in your hair, his breath tickling your neck, and his soft snores lulled you back to sleep.

Later that morning, Joel ventured out to the various garages in the neighborhood, trying to find a battery with enough juice to power the radio. You tried to busy yourself with unpacking and repacking your backpacks, making sure you were fully stocked with first aid, clothes, food, ammo, and rags - anything to keep your mind off the last 24 hours and how things have changed. But hard as you tried, your mind kept wandering to the feeling of Joel's hands and mouth all over you.

You heard a soft rumble of thunder in the distance. Looking out the window, you could see the sky was getting dark quickly. You glanced up and down the street to see if you could see Joel nearby but saw nothing.

You were in the small pantry, organizing the canned goods you collected and deciding which you would use for dinner tonight when Joel strolled through the front door, calling your name. You popped your head out from the pantry to grab his attention, noticing two car batteries in his arms. He put them both on the kitchen counter and turned to you, your hands each holding a canned vegetable.

“I think one of these might work,” he told you excitedly, "Got back just in time, it's about to pour." You tried to hide your disappointment. You knew that getting the radio to work was the beginning of the end to your blissful, domestic life at Hidden Springs. You gave him a pained smile and put the cans on the counter.

“That’s great,” you said, avoiding his gaze.  “Do you want corn or green beans tonight?”

Joel immediately picked up on your mood, taking a step forward and gently took hold of your chin in his hand.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his eyes searching yours for answers. You shook your head, still dodging his gaze, trying to release his grip, but it only made him grab you tighter.

“I don’t want this to end,” you finally admitted, looking into his eyes for the first time. “I’m not ready to leave.”

His eyes softened as he looked at you, stroking his thumb along your jaw before pulling you forward to place his lips over yours for the first time since you left the bedroom. You moaned, wrapping your arm around the back of his neck to pull him closer and deepening the kiss. His tongue flicked against your lips, and you opened your mouth, allowing him to explore deeper. The desire damn near suffocated you as you ran your hand down his chest to his waistband, pulling him forward and groaning at the feeling of his stiffening cock against your hip. His hands ran down the length of you before settling on the back of your thighs and lifted you up to sit on the kitchen island. Joel broke the kiss and took half a step back to admire you, raking his eyes up and down your body.

“I had a fantasy like this, once,” he admitted, rubbing his hands along your thighs.

“Yeah?” you whined, chasing his mouth as he hovered over your own but stayed just out of reach. “Tell me.” He groaned at the now familiar command, gripping your hips tightly.

“I wanted to fuck you on my kitchen island,” he confessed, staring you dead in the eye as he watched for your reaction. “I wanted to sink my fingers inside you and watch you come, then I wanted to stuff you full of my cock and make you scream.” A rumble of thunder sounded closer now, the skies looking like they were about to open up.

Your head dropped to the side and your eyes rolled to the back of your head at his words, panting for breath now as you reached out to grab his shoulder and pull him closer to you. Your lips latched onto his feverishly, and slipping down from the counter, unbuttoned your jeans before breaking the kiss and turning around, pressing your ass against his hips. You looked back at him innocently over your shoulder.

“Show me," you told him, as the rain began to fall quietly outside.

That was all the permission he needed to unzip your pants and yank them down along with your underwear, tapping your ankle with his own to make you spread your legs as far as you could with your legs still caged by your jeans. You obliged, jutting your hips out to him, anxiously waiting for his touch. He ran his hands down your ass slowly before giving one cheek a firm smack, prompting a small cry from you. He wasted no time before he took two fingers to explore along your slit, feeling the wetness collecting there as you moaned and tilted your head back.

“Are you always this ready, sweetheart?” he mumbled in your ear, slipping one finger inside you as you gasped and shook your head.

“No,” you replied, rolling your head to the side, “only for you.”

He groaned at your words, pushing a second finger inside you, making you wail as he thrusted them in and out, his breath ragged matching your moans. He pumped his fingers inside of you from behind, your hips matching his pace as you tried to chase your high, his other hand digging mercilessly into your hip.

“Joel,” you whined, your eyes squeezed shut as you felt the pressure build. “I’m gonna come, baby, please!”

“Then do it,” he snarled in your ear, a flash of lightning reflected on the windows. His hand released your hip and went down to hastily undo his belt. “Come all over my fingers, then I’m gonna make you scream my name with my cock.” He pressed a finger on your aching clit two, three times before you came, gasping and throwing your head back.

He didn't waste any time, quickly removing his fingers from your cunt and pressing the tip of his cock against your opening, giving you only a few seconds to realize what was happening before he pushed inside you with a deep groan. This time, he hardly gave you any time to adjust as he snapped his hips against your ass over and over, making you cry out and bite down on your lip, gripping the edges of the counter. He leaned forward and sunk his teeth into your clothed shoulder as you bucked against him, your hips desperately trying to match his rhythm. The rain beat steadily on the windows now as you could feel beads of sweat beginning to form at the sides of your head, gasping for air at the intense pace Joel set. You turned your head as far as you could to look back over your shoulder at him, his jaw slack as he stared down where he pummeled into you, your ass rippling with each thrust.

"Was it like this?" you asked, panting for breath. He finally looked up and saw you watching him, a smile spreading across your face.

"No," he grunted, fucking into you faster, making you squeeze the edges of the counter even harder. "This is so much fuckin' better."

You groaned and your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your pussy squeezed around him, and he could tell you were about to come.

"That's it," he panted, pulling you up from the counter so your back was flush against his chest, the new angle sending you over the edge. "Let go. Let me feel it. I can't get enough."

As promised, you screamed out his name at the same time thunder roared outside. You felt a jolt go through your whole body as you came, your slick coating his cock, gazing helplessly at the ceiling as he rammed into you, chasing his own release.

"That's my girl," he gasped in your ear, his arm wrapped around your chest so you could barely move. "Fuck, you feel so good, like you were made for me-" He grunted and then quickly pulled out, making you whine at the sudden loss, but then you felt the warmth of his release coating your ass and dripping down the backs of your thighs.

You slumped forward over the island to catch your breath, and Joel followed suit, resting the side of his face between your shoulder blades as his hands slid down your arms down to find your own hands, splayed flat on the countertop, intertwining your fingers together. Your eyes fluttered closed, relishing the intimacy before he inevitably pulled away to clean you both up. After tucking himself back into his jeans, he kneeled on the floor to loop his fingers around the sides of your panties, still wrapped around your ankles, and pulled them up, peppering the backs of your legs with kisses along the way.

He began to pull on your jeans, but halfway up you reached down to take them from him, wiggling your hips as the denim slid around your waist. You turned around to face him, buttoning them back up before planting a bruising kiss on his lips. He groaned against your mouth, his hand coming up to cup your face before pulling back, resting your foreheads together.

"You're gonna wear me out, sweetheart," he murmured as his thumb stroked your jaw. You sighed, leaning into his touch and gazed up at him through your eyelashes.

"I can't help it, I just keep thinking about all the times we could have been doing this," you whispered, your hand coming up to cover his own. "You could have been bending me over the desk in your office a year ago, instead of a kitchen counter in the middle of nowhere."

He inhaled sharply at the visual of fucking you in his office, his hand covering your mouth as he railed into you.

"Filthy girl," he muttered, pressing his lips firmly against yours before adding, "I thought about doin' that constantly, drove me insane." He could feel the blood rushing to his cock again, wondering how it was possible to want somebody this badly.

You hummed as you ran your hands up and down his torso, reaching up to finally plant a kiss on that heart shaped patch of skin in his beard, his hand dropping from your face to grip your upper arm, and another roll of thunder echoed through the house.

"Here are those reports you asked for, Mr. Miller," you whispered, leaving a trail of kisses down his neck, the low groan in his throat vibrating against your lips. You were already soaking through your underwear again, sighing as you turned your head to press small kisses on the other side of his neck. "Is there anything else I can do for you today?"

"Yeah," he growled, his grip on your arm tightening. "Get on your fuckin' knees and suck me off while I hop on this conference call."

He felt the smile tug across your lips against his throat, reaching down to palm his impossibly hard cock over his jeans.

"Whatever you need, sir," you murmured. You pulled away and sunk to your knees on the floor, placing your hand over his belt when you froze. You thought you heard a shout outside, but it was hard to tell through the thunderstorm. You frowned, looking up at Joel to see if he heard it too, but he was already looking through the kitchen and past the living room out the front window, his eyes widening, then ducked down behind the kitchen island where you were already squatting.

"Shit," he whispered, peering one eye around the corner of the island to look out the window. He saw at least four men carrying rifles and shotguns, shouting to each other over the rain, kicking the door in across the street and waving their arms, motioning for two more men to follow, as they ran inside the empty house to get out of the storm.

"How many?" You whispered, even though you knew they couldn't possibly hear you.

"Six, maybe more," he said through clenched teeth. Once he was sure they were all inside the house, he turned back to you. "We gotta be quick. Grab our packs and coats, I'll go get our weapons and we gotta sneak out the back," he told you, jutting his chin towards the mud room door off the kitchen. "Once this storm lets up, they'll come back out." He saw the look in your eye, and he put a stop to it before you could even say anything.

"There's too many, we can't take 'em sweetheart, I'm sorry." He knew you didn't want to leave, but you both knew this day would come sooner or later. "Now, c'mon, go get our stuff, stay as low as you can so they don't see you in the windows."

You turned away from him and army crawled along the kitchen floor into the den, slowly pulling each of your backpacks towards you, staying below the windows in the room that faced the street. You slung yours over your back and hooked his around your wrist as you turned back, still flat on the floor, and pulled yourself back into the kitchen, shoving his pack near the back door and shrugging yours off to leave next to his. You noticed the door leading to the garage was cracked, and you heard Joel rummaging in the garage for your weapons. Lucky for him, there were no windows to avoid in there.

You continued to crawl towards the living room where you saw your coats draped over the arm of the couch, pulling them down slowly, thankful the rain was coming down so hard now that it was making it difficult to see outside.

By the time you made it back into the kitchen, he was already waiting behind the island with your weapons in hand. You tossed him his jacket and shimmied yours on, zipping it up before pulling your pack back on, now sitting behind the island with him.

"I just repacked these this morning while you were out," you whispered as he pulled his backpack on. "Whatever we're missing, we can get along the way." He nodded, handing you your bow and handgun, while he shouldered his rifle and slipped his revolver into the back of his jeans.

"You ready?" He asked, meeting your gaze. You nodded, trying to hold back your emotions, knowing it was stupid to get attached to a house. He reached his hand out to cup your jaw, knowing what you were thinking without having to say it. He leaned forward, pressing his lips against yours quickly, then dropped his hand to crouch along the kitchen floor, motioning for you to follow him through the mud room and out the back.

Under the cover of the sheets of rain and neighboring houses, you followed Joel through the backyard and towards the woods surrounding your little sanctuary, throwing one last look over your shoulder, committing the image of the white house with blue shutters to your memory before turning back and facing the dense forest ahead.

Chapter Fifteen

Tag list: @chiogarza, @sparklejumpropequeen-777, @shotgun-shelby

[sparkrls]

Youtuber!Y/N x Harry Styles

MASTERLIST

Summary: Y/N is a Youtuber who does videos on celebrity gossip, then gets cancelled for the unethical nature of her channel. And finds her way to Harry to be better and learn from her mistakes.

Author’s Note: Tumblr exclusive! We’re feeding the girlies 🤪

•••

THE DEVIL HAS FALLEN: Y/N Y/L/N FEUD WITH AMANDA MCADAMS FINALLY OVER?

After months of a brutal and relentless feud between Youtube influencer Y/N Y/L/N and actress Amanda McAdams, it seems that Y/N has finally disappeared

After deleting all social media posts, and wiping her accounts clean, Y/N released a statement on twitter, declaring:

Y/N Y/L/N started off as a Youtube creator, filming videos of her singing covers of her favorite songs. After finding no success, she began to venture into creating videos about the one thing she knew everything about: celebrity culture.

Y/N found rapid success and her videos soon became viral, with her first series, ‘Internet Gossip’, explaining various cases of infamous celebrity deama. With the rise of social media and a wave of consuming media based on celebrity drama and gossip, Y/N found her place among an audience of mostly young women.

Soon becoming very successful with her videos, she branched out, beginning a few series, among them, ‘Salty Scandal’, focused on celebrity feuds and ‘Radical Romance’, about ongoing or previous famous relationships.

Although Y/N had a large fanbase, her rise to celebrity status was her first red carpet at the People’s Choice Awards, where she participated as an interviewer. It didn’t take long for her to become viral, as she was abrasive and blunt with her questions, not wasting time by beating around the bush.

Among fans and watchers, she was known as someone who searched for truth. Among those questioned, she was thought of as a person who dedicated their life to exposing others and invading privacy.

Y/N began to see the results of her fame. Her community grew and she hosted countless red carpets, interviewing the most famous people on the planet. And just as she seemed on top of the world, her downfall came from her own creation.

With the video, ‘Amanda McAdam: Actress or Victim?’, Y/N claimed that McAdam’s had dramatized her experience with a verbally abusive director, and that it was all for ‘a pity party’.

Following this video, McAdam’s and Y/L/N began a long feud, including several Twitter arguments and subtle shade thrown at each other in interviews or Instagram posts.

It culminated in what seemed to be the final blow; McAdam leaking Y/L/N's address. People and paparazzi alike stood outside of Y/L/N's home, with signs and hollers to let her know what they thought of her. This caused the Youtuber to have to hire private security to escort her as she moved to an undisclosed new home.

Everyone is glad to see Y/N, the devil of the internet, finally gone from the public view. Hopefully forever.

liked by y/nstan07 and 188,242 others

celebrityupdates Y/N Y/L/N spotted for the first time in THREE MONTHS out in LONDON today!

view all 2,541 comments

username1 wtf? who wants to see her?

username2 Did I miss something? Since when is she in hiding? And didn't she use to live in LA?

-> username3 Since her address was leaked by Amanda

-> username2 omg, that’s so fucked up

-> username3 Y/N had it coming after all the shit she said about Amanda

username4 idc what y’all say, y/n is still an icon and that b**ch

username5 I don't agree with anything that Y/N does, but her having to move to another CONTINENT to avoid stalkers and death threats is too far

username6 she should’ve stayed in hiding

username7 Y/N is so fake, she deserves all the hate, tbh

liked by yourinstagram and 5,927 others

ynisthatbitch Y/N for her newest interview with Variety

view all 1,876 comments

username1 WTF? Isn’t she cancelled?

username2 I really don’t care how much she claims to have ‘changed and improved’. Once a devil always a devil

username3 Y/N does NOT deserve a redemption arc after all the shit she talked

username4 Does Y/N seriously think that she can disappear a few months, claim to have gone to therapy and done self-reflection and everything will be fine?

-> username5 I think she just craves attention

-> username6 LMAO fr, Y/N just wants to be famous again. TOO BAD!

username7 Honestly y’all, if you took the time to read the article properly, you’d understand that Y/N was just a teenager!

-> username8 Y/N was literally fifteen when she started making those videos. Every 15-year-old makes mistakes

-> username9 Y/N is no longer 15. She’s now 21 and should know better.

-> username10 Or maybe it took a reality check to burst Y/N’s bubble and make her realize that she’d normalized things that shouldn’t be normalized?

-> username9 That sounds like excuses to me

liked by sparkrls and 107,187 others

harryflorals HARRY AND Y/N Y/L/N LEAVING THE SAME GYM TODAY IN LONDON!

view all 15,678 comments

username1 WHAT THE FUCK???

username2 this cannot be real

username3 why would harry associate with the devil?

-> username4 lmao fr fr

username5 It has to be a coincidence

-> username6 Did Harry conveniently forget that Y/N once made a whole video about his relationship with Kendall Jenner and called it a 'wretched PR stunt’???

-> username7 I find it crazy to believe that THIS isn’t a PR stunt

username8 Maybe y’all shouldn’t make assumptions about people you haven’t met? Harry clearly knows Y/N personally and has good judgment.

-> username9 stfu, no one asked for your opinion

username10 Is it so wild to believe that people can change (Y/N)?

-> username11 once a devil, always a devil

liked by gemmastyles and 833,384 others

annetwist It was wonderful to meet the lovely @yourinstagram and finally hear her perspective on her life! Read the article, written by yours truly. Thank you, Y/N, for your well-thought and introspective words ❤️

view all 22,864 comments

yourinstagram Thank you for giving me the chance to talk to you and share my side of the story 🫶

-> annetwist 💕

username1 Y/N is Anne-approved. That’s all I need to know.

username2 what is wrong with the world?

username3 I expected better of you. I thought you had common decency than to associate with the devil

-> annetwist I believe that God is all about forgiveness and Y/N has found her way to kindness and forgiveness ❤️

username4 say it with me, 4+4=

-> username5 ATEEE

username6 Thank you, Anne, for interviewing Y/N and giving us such a fresh perspective on everything that happened in her life. Loved the article 💕

-> annetwist Thank you, love

liked by gemmastyles and 2,194,801 others

yourinstagram Hell Is My Birthplace. New Single. Jun 1, 2022.

view all 7,657 comments

annetwist Can’t wait to hear it

harrystyles 🔥

-> username1 EXCUSE ME?!?

taylorswift WOW. Loved the preview 😉

-> username2 MOTHER?

-> username3 nothing is more iconic than y/n’s once greatest rivals now becoming her biggest supporters

username4 Y’all doubting if Y/N changed, but if Taylor and Harry can forgive her, so can I

username5 ICON. MOTHER.

username6 you don’t get it. y/n was called a devil and now she’s saying hell is her birthplace. and it was announced on the anniversary of her cancellation. you just don’t get it.

username7 no one will ever love y/n and her cunty moves more than me

username8 I LOVE YOU

username9 I hope your address gets leaked again

username10 ONCE A DEVIL ALWAYS A DEVIL

-> username11 stfu

liked by ynstan07 and 15,768 others

ynupdates INSIDER INFO FROM DEUXMOI!

view all 1,656 comments

username1 I can’t imagine Harry with someone with Y/N

username2 Honestly, I get it. As an ‘I can fix him’ girlie, I understand Harry 😔

username3 not my husband with the devil!!!

username4 Speechless

username5 they lowkey seem cute together

username6 I'm happy if Harry is happy

username7 If Harry is dating her, then Y/N has definitely changed

liked by harrystyles and 1,646,410 others

yourinstagram Paint the Town Red. 2nd Single.

view all 2,678 comments

username1 not harry liking all of her posts 😭

-> username2 man is WHIPPED

username3 MMM SHE THE DEVIL

-> username4 obsessed with y/n leaning into the devil image during her comeback

username5 is anyone concerned that she’s being so provocative?

-> username6 y/n has been laying low and keeping her life to herself. i’m not concerned

-> username7 i think she’s the happiest she’s ever been, tbh

username8 that line "You can't talk no shit without penalties" DAMN

-> yourinstagram I said what I said

liked by harrystyles and 1,121,107 others

yourinstagram dancing with our hands tied. a good metaphor and my 3rd single. out now <3

view all 3,787 comments

harrystyles 💕

-> username1 harry KNOWS this song is about him and y/n

-> username2 He’s a proud boyfriend and we stan

username3 omg the soft launch

username4 PARENTS 😭

username5 lowkey concerned about the two together

username6 am i the only one who doesn’t like the two of them together? it feels icky

-> username7 good thing it’s not your relationship

-> username6 y/n is a terrible person

-> username8 you’ve never met her. don’t make assumptions

username9 awww my babies 😭

username10 I LOVE YOUR MUSIC AAAAA

liked by yourinstagram and 5,677,207 others

harrystyles Grammys. February 2024.

view all 87,567 comments

yourinstagram thanks for being my date <3

-> harrystyles always xx

username1 not my parents flirting in the comments 😭😭😭

annetwist cuties 💕

gemmastyles love you both ❤️

username5 THE FAMILY APPROVAL

username6 Y/N is officially the first gf to be on Harry’s IG feed

username7 tbh, I think that Harry really helped Y/N at her worst and allowed her to redeem herself

-> username8 FR. look at her smile. She’s never seemed so happy. I think Y/N is finally being herself

-> harrystyles Y/N did all the work herself, I was just along for the ride x

-> yourinstagram Don’t be fooled no matter what he says, he saved me.

username10 WAR IS OVEEERRRR

username11 I love seeing Y/N grow so much in her life

-> username12 I don’t think she ever liked who she was before. She seems so happy now

-> yourinstagram Funny how being yourself can fulfill a person. Become a version of yourself that you can love and love will surround you

[misc-obeyme]

Okay I did have this from an anon who included a request for Asmo in their ask:

i was also thinking about mirror sex with asmo! cause he would love watching himself in the mirror and hes totally getting off on reader watching them both too!

I'm saving your ask for when I post the other thing you requested. I did them both because I didn't have another request for Asmo!

And I kinda ended up writing a somewhat shy MC who doesn't really like looking at themselves in the mirror, so there's that.

Hopefully it turned out okay!

Thanks for submitting a prompt!

KINKTOBER 2023

GN!MC x Asmodeus

NSFW MDNI

Warnings: mirror sex, penetration (reader receiving)

You sat on the edge of Asmodeus's vanity table, your back to the fancy mirror. Asmo himself stood between your knees, face buried in your neck, lips trailing across your skin, hands tugging at your clothes.

You had been surprised when he pulled you over to the vanity table in the middle of your make out session. He had pushed all the beauty supplies to the side before lifting you to perch on the edge. You hadn't really bothered to ask about it, since you were otherwise occupied. You had removed his jacket long ago and now your hands were beneath his shirt, rubbing across his stomach and chest.

Asmo covered your face with kisses, making you laugh as you pulled his shirt over his head.

Asmo paused, his hands on your cheeks, his hair slightly mussed from brushing against the fabric of his shirt. "You're so stunning, MC," he said, his eyes roaming over your face.

You blushed. "Me? No, you're the one who's beautiful."

You thought Asmo would appreciate such a compliment, but instead he frowned. "We are beautiful. You're the only one who's as lovely as me, you know that."

You shrugged. You knew it was pointless to argue with him about it, but it wasn't like you weren't aware who the pretty one was between the two of you.

You didn't need to voice your thoughts for Asmo to know what you were thinking. He tugged you off the table, keeping you steady as you suddenly found yourself on your feet. Asmo carefully removed your clothing, kissing your body as he went. When you were free of every last piece, he turned you around to face the mirror on his vanity.

You squirmed, ready to move away, but Asmo held you in place, gently but firmly. He leaned in and whispered in your ear, "My beautiful MC. Let me show you just how gorgeous you are."

Your protests fell away as Asmo pressed a kiss to the back of your neck, slowly continuing down your spine. He took your hands and placed them on the vanity table so you were leaning forward. You instinctively parted your legs, then sucked in a breath as you felt his erection against you. You didn't even notice that he had removed his pants at some point, but you didn't have enough focus to think about that too much.

In that moment, you were trying not to look at yourself in the mirror, but it was difficult. You kept your eyes on Asmo, whose face you could now see in the reflection as he moved up to press himself against you. You let out a whine and pushed back against him.

Asmo laughed softly, wrapping his arms around your torso. "Look how sweet you are when you're needy," he said softly in your ear.

"Asmo," you said. "Stop teasing me…"

"Only when you finally look at yourself," Asmo said, watching you in the mirror's reflection. "Don't worry, hun. The mirror will fog up soon enough."

You laughed, meeting his eyes in the mirror for a moment before allowing your gaze to drop down to your own face.

After only a few moments, you watched your expression change as Asmo finally put his cock inside you. You gasped and Asmo watched you over your shoulder, his hands on your hips.

"See?" he said. "Aren't we dazzling?"

You tried to think of some kind of witty response, but all you managed was a moan. Asmo responded by thrusting slowly, dragging out every movement as if it was his goal to drive you crazy. And from the look on his face, he knew he was succeeding.

Asmo sped up, increasing the pace significantly, causing you to cry out. You couldn't help looking at the two of you in the mirror now, watching his expression change, too, as he lost himself in you.

Asmo had both arms wrapped around you, one hand playing with a nipple, the other between your legs, expertly making pleasure shoot through your entire body. Your spine tingled with it and it was all you could do to keep your hands flat on the table to steady yourself. Some of the products on the edges rocked gently with the rhythm of Asmo's thrusts.

And just as he had said, as you watched, the mirror began to fog up. It crept across the surface from the edges until the entire thing was covered in moisture.

You felt yourself getting close and words of praise spilled from your lips. You let your head drop as your body tightened, reaching out without realizing it to brace a hand against the mirror itself.

Asmo reached around you to wipe a hand across the mirror, creating a streaky section that was clear enough for you to see both of your faces again. You didn't have time to protest because in the next moment your entire body was clenching and the sweet release of your orgasm exploded inside you, running up through your limbs. Your eyes met Asmo's at the same time and you cried out his name. As you watched, his face turned blissful as he came inside you.

Even you couldn't deny how insanely hot it was to watch each other in the mirror like that. You were flushed and damp, but so was he, both of you with your hair awry and panting heavily. You also got to watch your expressions soften as you both came down, nestling happily into the afterglow.

You would help Asmo clean his vanity later. But in that moment, he simply pulled you back onto his bed so he could hold you close, whispering to you about how beautiful it was to watch you in the mirror like that. You admitted that you had enjoyed, too. After all, Asmodeus looked amazing when he was coming inside you.

flufftober | kinktober | masterlist | Thank you for reading!

taglist: @anxious-chick @t0tallycoolname @libidinous-weeb

[bonefall]

mmm would it be possible for Mistystar and Leopardstar to fight/met during the BOTTE? or was Leopard already fed up with Tigerstar, his batshit insane plans and her status reduced to 'Tiger's another lackey' (like Darkstripe and many others) to really care about revenge? if she ever thought about it, that is.. im assuming she would be pretty pissed about being killed (there was a post about Mistyfoot first trying to poison her and Leopard realized it and instead decided to take her on a solo patrol to.. deal with a rogue i think? and then Misty gave her a rock appointment) and might had thought about making Mistystar pay, but it's been soooo long before BOTTE that she might had.. moved on? or just decided she had better things to do, not sure.

I have a BIG rule for the BOTTE, an unmoveable object, which I will abide by like a solemn vow;

NO spirit will be killed by the same cat twice.

I already changed it so Yellowfang doesn't get Brokenstar (he's not even present) and Brambleclaw doesn't get Hawkfrost, so I certainly wouldn't have Mistystar do it to Leopardstar!

I have some ideas but first; context.

The Killing of Leopardstar

Mistyfoot was sloppy.

Leopardstar recognized the way that Mistyfoot had poisoned her food, because she'd done the same thing to Crookedstar before her. Not enough to make it quick, just enough to weaken.

The emotion that licks at her is frustration.

Is this what her life has come to? Dramatic irony? Is this some kind of cosmic joke? To die just like her predecessor, wasting away for a few seasons in the darkness of this musty den, before solemn mourning and empty platitudes from her underhanded murderer.

What should she even do about this? Reveal Mistyfoot in front of everyone, exile her, she plots against her from the safety of another Clan, some kind of rebellion, rah rah rah we just dealt with this.

It's boring. It's so boring it's offensive. This will be the state of RiverClan forever, deputies poisoning leaders and taking power quietly until the end of days. No honor, no nobility, just treachery until the sky dries up and its rich blue becomes a crackled pale-brown.

If she is to die, she will not go out in the slow and painful way she killed crookedstar without a fight.

So she smacks the limp fish aside and brushes past Mistyfoot with a snarl, not even caring enough to drink in the way her traitorous deputy's ears flushed pale, knowing she'd been caught.

Leopardstar calls for a rushed meeting, telling them all that there's actually 40 - 50 feral rogues on the border right now and she saw them all last night or something, so she's taking Mistyfoot to go confront them right now. Don't follow us.

(Something that the more astute members of the Clan immediately recognize as Leopardstar setting up cover for a death match, including Misty's brother Swansong. She snaps at him when he runs to stop her, Don't Follow.)

Once they're a fair distance away, at the southern delta that divides WindClan and RiverClan, where the cliffs will hide them and the wet stones will not catch the scent (and where Reedwhisker will die, someday), Leopardstar lays it out.

No more tricks. No more schemes. If one of them is to die, it will be with honor.

"You want my lives?"

(Boss music fades in. Misty sees the health bar appear lmao)

"Come and take them."

After she came and took them

Leopardstar is kind of obsessed with the final battle of her life. That fight was everything she hoped for, except that she didn't win.

She wants it again, and she will triumph this time.

Hawkfrost is easily able to twist it into, "You lost only because StarClan shone upon her with that stone. It wasn't real skill. Join our cause and we can get you that rematch, we will defeat Mistystar, win back RiverClan, and dethrone the Stars!" But at the end of the day, it's an excuse.

Same sort of excuse Leopardstar came up with when she believed she wanted an honorable battle, rejecting the guilt and fear that clawed at her to think about dying the way Crookedstar did.

She does this a lot. Dodging feelings of remorse or regret by substituting power fantasies, avoiding any hard lessons. She says she wants revenge, but what she's actually doing is avoiding taking an L. Shame is a vagrant in Leopardstar's heart; she will never let it stay for long.

But...

That's really hard to do when Tigerstar is actively using her and speaking over her in every interaction. Being here, in the Dark Forest, taking the SAME advice she once groomed into Hawkfrost to only look at the positives of Tigerstar's legacy and ignore atrocities, is embarassing.

It's HUMILIATING.

She had her starshine BASHED out of her with a rock and went to the hell she'd been downplaying since she "regrettably" tore down the Bonehill. Being Tigerstar's stooge. Reducing the proud, ferocious leader of RiverClan into a goon.

Towards the end, she will have a scene with Hawkfrost, proud warriors that they are as mentor and apprentice, and vaguely address this. As far as Leopardstar's ego will allow, of course... the shame of it.

It's an important moment, because it's as much about Leopardstar and Hawkfrost as it is about Hawkfrost and Ivypool.

Leopard is too set in her ways to change, even if she is capable of brief glimpses of self-reflection, of which this is one. Hawkfrost, however, is seeing his mentor and himself in a different light. How she'll let herself be humiliated over and over as long as she can cling to her ego... and how by doing Tigerstar's diplomacy work, Hawkfrost is doing the same.

And he's dragged his OWN apprentice into it, too. She accidentally double-killed her friend, Antpelt, but he killed him more by bringing all of these trainees here to begin with. How Ivypool gets pitted against Tigerheart because TigerSTAR is playing mind games, how it's destroying her bond with her sister, how much fun and joy in the Dark Forest he's missing out on by not giving the afterLIFE a chance...

How much he's thrown away for this, before and after his death.

I'm not sure yet if it's the LAST stop before the BOTTE, but it's close to the end of Hawkfrost's redemption arc. Recognition of self through the other. He is part of a cycle he has a choice to break.

But anyway... back to Leopardstar.

She wants to fight Mistystar, but I don't think I'll let her have that satisfaction. She has already gotten nearly everything she ever asked for and can't even acknowledge that she did.

I think it's most fitting for SWANSONG to finally get what he craves; a chance to take a burden off his sister.

Leopardstar allowed TigerClan to STRIP his brotherhood from her because they don't share blood. Forced him to pretend like Rippleclaw meant anything to him, as if Oakheart hadn't been his proud baba as long as he could remember. Stonefur, Mistyfoot, and Swansong are the kits of Graypool; and he's not gonna let this golden FART ignore that ever again.

So my idea is that when Leopardstar meets Mistyfoot in the Second Wave of the BOTTE, she pounces onto her for her rematch, but Swansong BURSTS out of the crowd in response and rips her off, allowing Mistystar to go back to defending their Clanmates

"I don't want YOU," Leopardstar spits, "My battle is with Mistystar!"

"Tough titfeathers! It's MY turn to get a hit in for Stonefur!" He bristles with equal parts fury and excitement, lunging towards a fight he's dreamed of for years.

Still subject to change, though! And I'm not sure if Swansong dies here, or in the 3rd Wave, or if maybe he succumbs to injuries after the BOTTE is over.

It would also be fitting if he got a whack on Mapleshade though... since Maple doesn't even consider him Applekin and won't curse him. It would be neat for him to get angry about that lmao. "What do you MEAN my siblings are haunted by a demon? But NOT ME?? What ELSE am I getting left out of???"

EDIT: I'm currently planning to kill him in the 2nd Wave

[queercoshon]

I wrote another thing! This one has been in the works for a while. It is also posted on my deviantart. It's a little bit softer than the usual content I post. As always, please feel free to leave suggestions/ideas

‐------------

When I first moved into your spare room, I was definitely on the smaller side. Adult life had bulldozed me, and I learned quick meals and protein bars were the easiest way for me to eat. If I had to make something more complicated, chances are I would just forget to eat entirely.

You, on the other hand, loved to cook, bake, and create different cocktails. Every overindulgence in the past few years showed on your body, curves cascading down your back and flaring at your hips, and your belly often hanging over the waistband of your pants.

You quickly picked up on my food habits, and were quite frankly appalled.

"How can you not love food? Every flavour, every texture? Food is art to me. Have you had good food before?"

I shrugged, because, no, not really. My experience with food thus far had been boxed pastas, cans of soups and chilis, whatever frozen meals were on sale, and various boxed snacks. Eating them didn't bring me a fraction of the joy you got just from talking about food.

Thus began your mission of making me fall in love with at least one dish.

You really could have stopped at the first dish. The leek and potato stew blew my mind. I had never had leeks and found potatoes flavourless mush. But somehow you managed to make such mundane ingredients into a symphonious dish, tastes layering over one another. I could not get enough. The warmth spread from my stomach to encompass my body, and in my cozy bliss I just kept eating, chasing the high of this delectable experience.

I had eaten so much my stomach didn't even slosh when I painstakenly got up from the table.

Your first success spurred you into overdrive. You sought different flavour profiles and combinations, testing to see which ones would make me melt. Most of them did.

Most days I was coming home to the scent of dinner leading me down the hall, with an underlying sweetness hinting at dessert.

You tried a wide range of cuisines. Pot pies, various proteins with rice and veggies, curries from all around the world, and so many different types of pasta. Desserts include cobblers, doughnuts, pies, cakes, and a variety of pastries. I could not believe how much flavour was in everything, and was desperate to get as much of it as possible. Every meal ended with me breathing shallowly, hand caressing my overburdened gut, and you with a satisfied smirk on your face.

With your increase in cooking came your increase in eating. Slowly your body started to billow outward, filling out all your clothes, finally forcing you to look at specialty stores to restock.

My weight gain was not so slow. My body was so used to running on minimal to average calories, it didn't know what to do with the sudden influx, now having to process at least twice what I used to eat in a day.

The first place it was noticable was my gut. It only took a week or two before I had a cute little pot belly. It would push open the buttons on my shirt, and cause issues when buttoning my pants. The rest of my body followed suit. My thighs and ass started to swell, my arms felt constricted in my t-shirts, and a double chin was quickly noticable. I barely noticed. I was so caught up in a whirlwind of culinary pleasure that I paid no mind to my tightening waistbands and my gut starting to peak out of my shirt.

Soon you started cooking breakfast, too. The table would be covered in food, from pancakes to bacon, hashbrowns to quiche. Each day there was something different, and each day I gorged until nearly comatose.

Eating like this every day rapidly changed my body, I had put on 100lbs in 11 months, from the first time you made that stew. I had upgraded my wardrobe 4 times, and was needing to again soon.

And then is was December. The month of overindulgence. Holiday parties every weekend. Potlucks, cocktail parties, hearty meals, sometimes multiple events in the same day.

This was the first time I truly appreciated food; the tastes, the textures, and the stories behind each dish. I tried everything, and then I tried everything again. Most nights I struggled to waddle from the car to my bed. On the rare occasions I wasn't fit to burst, you sat me down on the couch and made me try your creations for the next party. On those nights, I was bound to pass out in the living room, eyes glazed over, gut too stuffed to think about getting up.

Despite all the socializing and gatherings, Christmas day was quiet, just the two of us. I didn't want to fly across the country to see my few relatives, and you were going to do a late holiday dinner with your family at the end of January, when work slowed down for your parents.

I received two sets of pajamas that year. One from you, plaid pants and a red flannel top. It was a little big, but we both knew that wouldn't be the case for long. The other pair I got was from a childhood friend I hadn't seen in person in over 2 years. The pants were baby blue with snowflakes, and the tank top had a cheesy graphic and the phrase "Let it Snow!"

When you went to go work on the feast planned for the day, I tried the second pair of pajamas on. Despite being incredibly stretchy, I could barely get the pants past my thighs. My ass was hanging out the back, and the drawstrings were instantly lost in the waistband. The graphic on the shirt was horrendously distorted, and I could feel a breeze on the bottom of my belly. I was about to change back into the first pair of pjs when you called me for Christmas meal. My mind now only focused on one thing, I stopped what I was doing and lumbered to the table.

You called it Christmas Meal, because it was past noon, but well before dinner time. With the amount of food you made though, we could be there well into the night. There was the traditional fixings; turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes, green beans, honey roasted carrots, sweet potato casserole, and dinner rolls, but you also added a baked ziti dish, homemade pizza rolls, and cottage pie. Bottles of wine, apple cider, and sparking water lined the middle of the table. There was enough food for 10 people, and we were just 2. I could smell desserts being baked to perfection in the other room.

"This looks amazing! I've never had anything like this. I'm sorry I couldn't help..."

You patted my stomach and laughed. "The only help I need is getting it all eaten. Load up and dig in!"

I piled my plate high with everything I could fit. It would take me at least 2 plates to try everything, probably 3 with the portion sizes I was taking. I looked over, and saw your plate faced the same overburdened fate as mine.

You ladled me a generous glass of mulled wine from the crock pot.

"Cheers!"

And then we fell into a frenzied silence, only the cacophony of two gluttons enjoying a sinfully indulgent feast, and the tv still playing Christmas special reruns in the other room made noise in our tiny apartment.

I still don't know how you did it, but every bite I took had me holding back a moan.

My family had attempted to make a turkey once in my life, and it resulted in a tasteless hunk of disappointment, the bird so dried out that the white meat was somehow pointy and sharp. The one you made was opposite to everything I expected. It was nearly falling apart in my mouth, the seasoning from the brine and rub made it to every bite. Different levels of flavours washed over me, and my eyes nearly rolled into the back of my head.

Every dish you made was like this. Some of them I had equally dismal expectations of, like the green beans, sweet potato casserole, mashed potatoes, and pizza rolls, all things my family had made sacrilege of once. Everything else I either hadn't had, or only had store bought. Even the best store bought ziti bake didn't come close to yours.

I was put into a trance. There was not a moment where I was still, constantly chewing, swallowing, and reaching for the next bite. Everything was washed down with copious amounts of wine and cider.

My shirt was pushed up by my rounding gut, bunched up under my chest by the end of the 3rd plate, my cheeks were warm, and every gurgle my belly let out just pushed me to eat more.

Your clothes had given up containing your belly. It sat naked on full display, hanging out of your defeated shirt, pushing your thighs apart as it sank further. You were absent-mindedly rubbing the crest of your gut as you shoved another role in your mouth. I poured the last of the 2nd bottle of wine in your glass, and popped open the 3rd to serve myself.

It wasn't until just after starting my 7th plate that I realised how overstuffed I was. It all hit me at once, the bottom of my belly itching as my skin stretched around my stomach swelling forward, my breathe shallow and pained, my lungs given no room to expand, pushing out a burp with every other gasp of air. I couldn't lean back without getting a stitch.

You were in a similar state. Hiccups jolting your body shaking out burps, your hands gingerly massaging your gut which was red and almost shiny.

I don't know how long we sat there, just rubbing our guts and moaning. There was still food left, but maybe enough for 1 averaged-sized meal for both of us. Everything else was crammed into our bellies.

Firmly drunk now, the sensation of rubbing my belly was sending sparks along all my nerves. Between that and riding the high of the first Christmas meal I had ever enjoyed, I was lost in my own little world of bliss.

A harsh timer bell going off in the kitchen jolted me out of my stupor, unleashing a string of burps and a new bout of hiccups. You groaned as you got up, supporting your back and belly like you were 9 months pregnant.

You looked at me with a wine-soaked grin.

"Ready for dessert?"

[lovesongbracket]

Reminder: Vote based on the song, not the artist or specific recording! The tracks referenced are the original artist, aside from a few rare cases where a cover is the most widely known.

Lyrics, videos, info, and notable covers under the cut. (Spotify playlist available in pinned post)

Lay All Your Love On Me

Written By: Björn Ulvaeus & Benny Andersson

Artist: ABBA

Released: 1981

Cover included: Amanda Seyfried & Dominic Cooper for Mamma Mia!, 2008

“Lay All Your Love On Me” explores the high emotions and passions that can emerge when falling in love, and documents one woman’s shift into erratic behaviors as she falls under the spell of her new lover. The song hit number one in the US dance charts in 1981, but has lasted in popularity over the years, becoming an ABBA staple. It was featured in the band’s jukebox musical (and its movie adaption), Mamma Mia, and in 2006 was named the 60th greatest dance song of all time by Slant magazine.

[Verse 1] I wasn't jealous before we met Now every woman I see is a potential threat And I'm possessive, it isn't nice You've heard me saying that smoking was my only vice [Pre-Chorus] But now it isn't true Now everything is new And all I've learned has overturned I beg of you [Chorus] Don't go wasting your emotion Lay all your love on me [Verse 2] It was like shooting a sitting duck A little small talk, a smile, and baby, I was stuck I still don't know what you've done with me A grown-up woman should never fall so easily [Pre-Chorus] I feel a kind of fear When I don't have you near Unsatisfied, I skip my pride I beg you, dear [Chorus] Don't go wasting your emotion Lay all your love on me Don't go sharing your devotion Lay all your love on me [Verse 3] I've had a few little love affairs They didn't last very long and they've been pretty scarce I used to think that was sensible It makes the truth even more incomprehensible [Pre-Chorus] 'Cause everything is new And everything is you And all I've learned has overturned What can I do? [Chorus] Don't go wasting your emotion Lay all your love on me Don't go sharing your devotion Lay all your love on me Don't go wasting your emotion Lay all your love on me Don't go sharing your devotion Lay all your love on me Don't go wasting your emotion Lay all your love on me

Demolition Lovers

Written By: Matt Pelissier, Mikey Way, Ray Toro & Gerard Way

Artist: My Chemical Romance

Released: 2002

The Demolition Lovers are the couple seen on the cover for MCR’s next album, Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge. This song, along with much of the album, is a prequel to the story of Three Cheers… in which a man makes a deal with the devil to get his dead lover back by killing 1,000 evil men and giving the devil their souls in exchange for her. This song is most likely where the lover dies. The two “Demolition Lovers” are featured on the cover of the album.

[Verse 1] Hand in mine, into your icy blues And then I'd say to you, "We could take to the highway With this trunk of ammunition, too" I'd end my days with you, in a hail of bullets [Chorus] I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know just how much you mean to me And after all the things We put each other through and [Verse 2] I would drive on to the end with you A liquor store or two keeps the gas tank full And I feel like there's nothing left to do But prove myself to you, and we'll keep it running [Chorus] But this time, I mean it I'll let you know just how much you mean to me As snow falls on desert sky Until the end of everything I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know how much you mean As days fade and nights grow And we grow cold [Post-Chorus] Until the end, until this pool of blood Until this, I mean this, I mean this, until the end of [Chorus] I'm trying, I'm trying To let you know how much you mean As days fade and nights grow And we grow cold But this time, we'll show them We'll show them all how much we mean As snow falls on desert sky Until the end of every… [Interlude] All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this All we are, all we are is bullets, I mean this [Guitar Solo] [Bridge] As lead rains will pass on through Our phantoms forever, forever Like scarecrows that fuel this flame We're burning forever and ever Know how much I want to show you You're the only one Like a bed of roses There's a dozen reasons in this gun [Outro] And as we're falling down, and in this pool of blood And as we're touching hands, and as we're falling down And in this pool of blood, and as we're falling down I'll see your eyes, and in this pool of blood I'll meet your eyes, I mean this forever!

[fayrinferno]

The (printed) collection

From time to time I get a question like, "do you have this or that book?" So, a few weeks back, I finally took them all out of their hiding place and grabbed some photos. Wish I had used my camera instead of phone, I had to stand on a chair to get it all and yeah, the picture is not the sharpest.

Anyway, I have some other stuff, figures and such, although I admittedly DO focus more on books as an artist/writer/translator. These books are the ones I translate from so I wasn't going for mint conditions, although a few of them are. You can see some of them still packed in the store bags. I included the CDs cause... well, they were next to the books and they do have some printed material as well.

The Shiren Suiki book gets a separate photo cause after taking the photos at home I realized I had left it at work when I scanned it... practically crying as I did cause it was barely opened when I bought it and it's a beautiful book. My Anvils are also very fragile.

I may do a complete list one day but for now, here are the quick descriptions.

ARTBOOKS & FANBOOKS I have pretty much all of the major official books I think, missing maybe 1-2 pieces. The one that may look less familiar is Hiroshi Osaka's personal artbook. I also have four of the relevant Nobuteru Yuuki artbooks. The bottom right one with the orange title is the issue of Newtype Magazine with a feature about Esca.

SMALLER BOOKS (let's pretend that's a category) Here I got all the novels (they are out of their sleeves cause I was working on them), all the filmbooks, Secrets of Escaflowne, Escaflowne Bible, and the Energist Memories manga/doujin collection.

DOUJINSHI I was mostly going for stuff I haven't seen online so I only got a handful. Besides the Shiren Suiki book, there are three Minato Tajima doujins (one of them is racy heh but I'm not hiding that I have it). One of the other doujins may look unfamiliar; it's a compilation book that includes other series (the character on the cover is from DN Angel). People who talk to me on Discord probably recognize the Nanoka doujinshi cover.

CDs AND THE LIKE I don't have all the soundtracks for some reason, probably cause I thought the missing ones wouldn't be hard to get. The PSX game is the special edition with the tarot cards. The LDs that I literally bought just for the covers and inlays. I also have all the audio dramas, some CDs with extras... and a phone card that was for some reason packed in a CD case lol (kidding, it's precious that they would give it that kind of protection). Oh, and there are two movie posters which I guess don't fall under either category.

I have some other stuff that is kinda related to Esca "by association" such as by artist or things that "looked similar" but I didn't include them. Also the figures. I may update this post with those but this is the brunt of it. I will be posting some goodies from these soon!

Same goes for the ongoing translations that I've been doing updates on in this post. Life is too short to delay them for months and years because of perfectionism, or rather, being self conscious about one's imperfect language skills. I am thankful to everyone who has helped me so far, proofreading my translations (coverteyes, pikafwance, sevenstars, and radical-rad1986)... I'm not tagging you guys but know that I'm VERY grateful, also to the other people who are helping me with other projects). I always had fun working together with you but it's no longer sustainable and I likely bit off more than I can chew. So I will get myself out of the way. There are two books that are almost complete as of today so I will just probably go chapter by chapter. I hope to be done with this asap but also December is a busy month for me so I'm not sure how smoothly it will go. Let's hope it does.

[notfreetoday]

China's censorship of Justice in the Dark - some FAQ

photo cr @ 白夜飛行家 on weibo

Also known as The Abyss/Mo Du/Silent Reading (link goes to a great carrd made by a Mo Du fan) by Priest, the same author who brought us Guardian. The show was dropped on Youku China on the 18th of February and is now on Youku International (VIP needed from ep 3 onwards). 8 episodes have been released. There is no official release schedule yet, though the rumour is 5 episodes every Saturday at 10am China time. Total of 30 episodes, ending on the 11th of March (Yes rumours are this specific).

The English subs are AI generated, and they are not great. I hope they improve the subs as the show gains traction. (I watch on the China ver of the app, but I'll post any egregarious subbing errors if I come across them)

Changes made from the novel

The title, character names and premise has been changed. The ages of the some of the side characters/victims have also been changed. It's clear that scenes have been re-edited and re-dubbed, because some dialogue doesn't match the lip movements (WOH flashbacks anyone?) This is all to get pass censorship. A lot of the story, including the dialogue, has been preserved, and the changes aren't jarring.

Seems like there was a lot of uproar regarding the changes?

The show has been trending on weibo every day since it dropped, for good and bad reasons. Many book fans were upset with the changes on Day 1 and didn't bother watching pass the introduction of the premise, and there were complaints about the suitability of the actors' looks. By Day 2 the comments turned to "hey this isn't so bad??" And now everyone is just badgering youku for the next few episodes, cause they've literally released nothing else about the show since they dropped the episodes.

Has the story been sacrificed to pass censorship?

After watching 8 ep, I don't believe so. The novel covers sociopathy and the darkness of humanity - the show uses a "nuclear accident" as a reason for "genetic changes" in 1.3% of the population - causing these people to lose the ability to empathise with others. This is actually a very smart move because by blaming everything on a fictional, genetic mutation, the show can actually get away with showing the darker, more questionable parts of humanity, without having to censor it too much. The first case of the show mentions drugs and even has a short clip that heavily implies someone seizing from an overdose (you'll miss it if you aren't paying attention). There are underaged victims, and if they continue in this vein there will be more trigger warning worthy scenes from the book included. These things just don't get shown or talked about in c dramas - even if we don't talk about the BL, it's pretty crazy they managed to get this stuff out after the recent censorship changes.

Is the BL still.... there?

There are 8 episodes out so far and to me, it's working. We're not talking WOH level of chemistry here, but ep 3 onwards is when our CP starts paying more attention to each other. There is more than enough "candy" to find if you know what you're looking for. That said, it is not and will never be BL, just an adaptation.

Ok what am I looking for?

Glad you asked! Take for example the show's name change - from 深渊 (shen yuan) to 光•渊 (guang • yuan).

深 - deep 渊 - deep (often referring to a pool, so a deep dark pool, like in a cave) Shen Yuan comes from the novel and is translated as The Abyss, and represents Fei Du (Pei Su in the show)

光 - bright light Guang•Yuan is not a proper term by itself - it's a mash up of the words for bright light and deep pool. The light represents Luo Wenzhou (Luo Weizhao in the show), the one beam of light that penetrates Fei Du's darkness. Hence the English name "Justice in the Dark" is a pretty good translation.

The new names of the characters are Pei Su 裴溯 and Luo Weizhao 骆为昭. See the last character of each name? Su has the radical 月, for Moon in it, and Zhao has the radical 日, for Sun in it. The moon is considered Yin, and the sun is Yang. Together, they are Yin and Yang.

Hey maybe you think that's pushing it, but welcome to the life of a BL adaptation fan 🤣🤣

[floydsglasses]

𝙒𝙖𝙮 𝙊𝙪𝙩 𝙏𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 - Mickey "Fanboy" Garcia (A Quiet Place AU)

Pairing: Mickey "Fanboy" Garcia x AFAB Black!OC/Jasmine

SUMMARY: Monster's aren't the only thing that survivors of the quiet world have to worry about now, the people though they are hunted are the biggest threat of all. Two survivor's out of options agree to help each get out of the vacant city to safety.

Tags: Mention of blood/wounds, post apocalyptic setting, use of ASL, Alien creatures. Drug Use,mentions of death, Stranger's to lovers, Implied Smut, Angst, Swearing, Fluff,

A/N: I based this loosely off the Lord Huron Song, Way Out There, check it out when you can its so good.

WORD COUNT: HAVENT COUNTED

⏁⏁⏁

ALONE,That’s how he felt. Everything was gone and he is one out of many survivors, sometimes he thinks he is the last survivor. He will be walking through an abandoned neighborhood, seeing the ruined car’s and nature taking over it will make him miss everything he had taken for granted, and being able to make a sound.

He missed people, talking to them. He was a person who thrived off social interactions. Always finding a way to include people in the conversation even if it was a small conversation. The only thing he talked with now was the voice in his head, which sometime’s was loud enough that it made him think that it was someone there.

He had no real plan, he just wanted to make it to the next sunrise. Having been living in anywhere that seemed stable till he got bored or had to move. It was lonely spending each day wondering and not having any idea of what to do.

Today was a ‘moving day’. He left a motel six he had been walking since the sun had risen, he thought it would be nice to try and live in one of the high rise’s by the marina. He passed the turned over car’s, vine’s growing into the tire’s and out of the engine.

That was a nice car, he thinks. He bet if he went back to the naval base the F18’s will be overgrown with nature. He looked down sadly, he missed his job, and his RIO. His flat shoes crunched softly, the bottom’s worn out from the use.

CLINK!

He stopped, his hand resting over his knife holster. His brown eyes scanned around him, his heart racing in his ear’s searching for the cause of the sound.

CLINK! He panted as he ran to the other side of an overturned car, his back pressed firmly against the hood of the car, he unsheathed his blade from his leather holster. He inhaled deeply to slow his heart rate. The clinking noise came again.

He bit his lip, hoping that whatever made the noise stopped soon. He didn't know what exact noise the monster’s didn't like. He licked his lip’s gulping. A few minutes later, the noise had gone away at least he thought.

He stepped on the sidewalk, continuing his walk past abandoned shop’s and firm’s, not sure which part of San Diego he was in. He could see some factorie’s, he guessed that he was close to the sea from the gull’s crying.

A sharp pain shot throughout his entire body. He gasped as he fell back into the brick wall, clutching his shoulder, he pant’s stifling a scream that desperately wanted to leave his mouth. He snapped his head, a short black stick with a neon green end stuck out of his shoulder.

“Shit.” He mouthed.

CLINK, he snapped looking up. Two men wearing bandanas covering their faces carrying crossbows in their hand’s look at him. He grunted holding his shoulder as he started to run.

The tip of the arrow dug deep into him as he bolted, their footsteps not far behind him. His backpack weighed him down, slowing his escape from the masked figure. What did they want from him?

He turned a corner down an alleyway. He gasped as he forced against something, a clothed hand clamped down over his mouth, he grunted against the stranger’s hold on him. Stop it, they whispered.

His shoulder ached as he moved his arm’s. A cold metal touched his temple, his brown eyes widened at the circular pressure against his forehead, the stranger's grip on his mouth tightened as the two men ran past.

The warm body of the person behind him warmed his back, what were they gonna do with the gun? Shoot him, or shoot up leaving him as monster bait. The stranger grunted as they removed the cold metal from his forehead, their hand clamped tight over his mouth.

They leaned to their left moving him with them, their free hand gripped a glass bottle tossing it down the alleyway with a shatter. His eye’s widen as a inhuman roar filled the air. Sorry for this, the stranger whispered in his ear before his world turned dark.

⏁⏁⏁

A MUFFLED sound filled his ears. He groaned softly as his eye’s slowly opened, his arm still ached with a sharp pain. He could make out he was surrounded by brick’s, a factory-like place. He grunt’s softly grabbing at his shoulders. 

“Shit thought you were out longer.” A voice grumbled in a whisper. He pant’s in fear as he move’s his arms, a hand stops him.

“Don't move.” They whisper to him, he grabs at their hand. Their face covered by a floral bandana, their hair tucked inside of a baseball cap. Their brown eyes being the only part visible to him.

“Ow.” A female voice muffled by the cover say’s. 

He raised his brows. “How?” He signed, she pointed up at the ceiling.

“Three foot concrete they cant hear.” She signed her motion’s fast, he only knew basic asl. 

“What?” He signed, she shook her head.

“They can't hear,we are too far underground.” She whispered to him, she moved his jacket sleeve off his arm. He furrowed his brow. 

“What are you doing?” He whispered, she didn't answer. He shook his head irritated, his finger’s pulled down her bandana. Her eyes widened at him.

She glared at him as he stared at her for a moment. He hadn't seen another person in so long it was comforting to see someone, especially someone as pretty, what he did not expect was the look of anger. 

“Am I gonna have to handcuff you?” She fumed, she pulled his hand away from her.

“Sorry.” He apologized, she pulled out a needle,thread, alcohol,. 

“What are you doing?” He asked her again, and she looked up at him. “Sewing you up.” She says bluntly, she leaned over grabbing a white rag, his hand pat around his shoulder where the arrow used to be. 

“You removed it?” He asked her. She shrugged, soaking the rubbing alcohol into the rag. 

“Yeah now I'm gonna have to sew you back up.” She  tells him. His brown eyes widen in fear.

“What.wha sew me up?” He stammered. 

“Yes, Unless you would prefer to bleed out.” She joked with a dry laugh, he shook his head. She grumbled under breath, she at him. 

“You don't happen to have vodka on you, do you?” The girl asks him.

“What?” He said, confused, she shook her hand. “What about bleach?” She ask’s. He shook his head. 

“No, What are you talking about?” He wonder’s, she bit her lip, she poured the alcohol into a plastic butter container.

“I'm almost out of alcohol so look’s like I'm using the rest on you.” She says to him. 

She set the thread in the liquid, leaning over to him. “Can you roll this out of the way?” She asks him, gesturing to his gray long sleeve shirt. 

“You want me to do it for you?”She wondered. He shook his head. He groaned as he slowly pulled his sleeve down, lifting it up over his head, his black curl’s falling back down. She flicked on her bright pink lighter with a duck on the side. 

She removed the sewing needle from her bag, moving the flame under her needle. “What are you doing?” He asked, his heart racing. 

“Sterilizing it.” She state’s, he leaned back. He wasn't sure what he was even laying on, just that it was safe for him to talk.  “If blood loss doesn't kill you, infection will.” 

“No offense but.” He gulped as she threaded the needle. The sharp end made his heart drop to his stomach. 

“Your bedside manner suck’s.” He chuckled weakly, she rolled her eye’s. “My exe’s might think differently.” She mumbled under her breath, she got on her knees to his side. 

She inhaled deeply.”I'm gonna tell you now this is not gonna be pretty.” She warns him, he nodded his head. 

“You can hold my hand if you want.” She suggests to him, he whipped his head looking at her. She picked up his shirt, wrapping it tightly and handing it back to him.

“Bite down on this.” The girl ordered him. He pants, taking it from her, putting the gray henley in his mouth, gritting his teeth against it. She grabbed the warm needle hovering over his wound. 

“Take a deep breath.” She says, she closed her eyes as she prepared herself. She winced as she began to thread through his skin. He screamed in agony, his cries muffled from the cloth against his mouth. 

Hot tears escaped his eyes flowing down his face,she winced at the man in pain. His finger’s gripped against her free arm as she continued to work to patch him up. 

⏁⏁⏁

HE PANTED, staring at the concrete above him. The pain in his shoulder diminished thankfully, though he could still feel it. She walked between the wood table set against the wall, she pulls out a shirt from her milk crate. She walked back over to him.

“Should fit.” She tells him, lightly tossing him a dark green henley shirt. He grabbed at it, slowly sitting up against the carseat, he groaned pulling the shirt over his head, being mindful of his patched up wound.

“Who were those guy’s?” Mickey wonder’s, she pulls her plaid shirt close to herself.

“San Diego bandits.” She answers. He furrowed his brow’s. “Who?” he ask’s.

She sighed irritated. “You don't know do you?” She says, she crossed her arms turning around to look at him.

“Their a group of radical’s killing anyone in the city who makes a sound.” She explained to him, he raised a brow. “Why would they do that?” He wondered, she shook her head.

“Because they think that by silencing anyone, they are appeasing god and that he will take the monster’s back.” She explained.

“So that’s why they tried to kill me, to stop me from making noise?” He ask’s her, she shrugged.

“That or they were gonna auction you off.” She says, his heart dropped. “Auction me? Like fucking cattle?” He ask’s, she shrugs.

“In a way, yes.” She answered. She puts her hand on her hip’s. “Some people they keep alive, other’s they drag out, and leave them as a sacrifice.” She explains.

He shook his head. “How do you know so much about them?” He wonder’s

“Because I used to be one of them.” She tells him. She sighed leaning back. “That was two months ago.” She clarifies. His brows furrowed.

“I've been in the city for two years, and never met them.” He tells her, and she shrugged again.

“They did not form till a year ago, and they didn't become violent till six months ago.” She informs him. He shook his head in shock. He was lucky they hadn't found him yet. They could have killed him at any chance.

“And I have some bad news for you.” She speaks up. He looked at her, she inhaled through her nose. “This thing isn't over for you.” She tells him.

“What? What are you talking about?” He ask’s her.

“When they dont silence someone, they will do everything they can to make sure you don't come back.” The girl explained to him, he ran his fingers through his curly black hair, his heart began to race.

“Are you serious?” He ask’s her, she nodded. He swore under his breath as he began to pace back and forth. “But.” She started, he crossed his arms looking at her, not expecting something good.

“I won't let them get to you…if you help me.” She says to him. His mouth parted agape. “Is that why you saved me?!” He wondered, he took a step forward.

“Just because you need someone to help you?” Mickey ask’s, she shakes her head.

“I saved you because I'm not an asshole.” She state’s bluntly.

“Really?” He says with a brow raised. “So you holding a gun to my head makes you less of one.” He remark’s rolling his eyes. Her jaw dropped, shaking her head.

“You mean me holding a car lighter to your head.''The woman tells him. She shook her head again.

“Baby the closest I have ever gotten to being violent with another human was when I held my hand over your mouth.” She declared, he wiped his mouth, regretting his choice of words.

“Look if you wanna go back out into that city and risk the chance of actually losing your life.” She sneered, she gestured up. “Be my guest.”

She step’s forward, her eye’s darkened as she glared at him. “But if you wanna get out of this god forsaken city..then you will help me.” She stated.

He takes a deep breath, collecting himself. “Fine.” He conceded.

“Okay then.” She smirked, she turned around grabbing a small blue book in bold font, San Diego County Map, tabbed with different colors. She placed the book on top of metal table.

“A month ago, I went down to the old coast guard sector, I tried to get on one of their boat’s to work.” She explains opening the small book, opening a map part of the book, pointing at the word’s in sharpie.

“As you can see it clearly didn't work, and I sure as shit dont know the first thing about fixing boat’s.” She admit’s with a weak laugh. “And what makes you think I know how to fix a boat?” Mickey wonder’s.

She reached into her front pocket, a jingling of metal peaked his interest. From her finger’s dangled a chain with a small metal plate at the bottom. He held out his palm as she placed the cold misc on it.

He turned the plate over, reading. Mickey Garcia, Fanboy. US NAVY.He looked at her in shock. “You went through my bag?!” He exclaimed in anger, she shook her head.

“It fell off your bag.” She says, she shook her hand. “You were in the military? So you have some type of knowledge about mechanic’s right?” The girl wonder’s.

He stammered for a moment. “I mean yes, I flew onto boat’s I didn't.” He stuttered, she shook her head.

“Yes or no, can you help me?” She asks him. He sighed, rolling his eyes. “Yes I can help you.” He tells her, her lips formed a thin line.

She extends her hand out. “Shake on it.” She ordered.

“I always shook hands with client’s, it's a sign of trust.” She explains to him, he nods his hand. Gripping her hand in a hand shake. “You have a name?” She ask’s. His brow rose.

“Don't you already know it?” He wonder’s, she shrugged. “I do but you should tell me it yourself.” She admits.

“Mickey.” He tells her. She smirked, impressed. “Jasmine, my friend’s called me J.J.” She says to him, she takes her cap off her head, her curly pixie cut shaking it off.

“I'll take you to the depot in the morning, it's about a three mile walk.” She list’s off to him, she bent down to the plastic crate by her legs pulling out a can of beefaroni. “I'm gonna heat this up,and you.” she points at him.

She rummaged through her pink crate, pulling out a red book. She grunt’s tossing it over to him. He read the title. Sign Language for Everyone: Basic Course.

“There is a safety shower in that back corner, it has only one setting that is lukewarm, I have another hammock you can set up.” JJ tell’s him.

“Oh I don't wanna be a bother.” He told her, and she shook her head.

“Trust me you dont wanna sleep on that seat.” JJ say’s to him. “Okay then.” He says, she smirked turning around, grabbing a chisel popping the can open.

⏁⏁⏁

THE BOAT gently rocked back and forth. She sat at the back of the response boat, gripping her large knife. She covered her face with the bandana again, her short curly hair hidden away in her green baseball cap.

Her brown eyes scanned all over for any threats. Conversation between the two was limited, only because he didn't know ASL as well as she did, and that he was busy fixing up the mistake she had made with the boat.

When she first found it she had tried to find the owner’s manual, she guessed the military didn't leave that out in the open. She sighed bored, she claimed she was an introvert, she usually preferred the comfort of her underground fortress.

Even before the world ended she was happy to be left alone in her crowded apartment. There were point’s where she practically thrived off of how quiet things were now, before the world was to be overrun with noise.

Now actually talking with someone after so long, made her think. A soft grunt’s pull’s her out of her thought’s. She looked up at him, his curly black hair pulled back into a tight ponytail.

“How is it?” She signed fast. His lips parted as he thought of what she might have said. She shook her head standing up carefully getting up walking inside the cabin. She grunted unhooking a whiteboard.

Day’s without an incident, 28 days. She quickly wiped away the black dry erase getting on her purple windbreaker.

“How is it?” She write’s down, he nodded his head taking it from her, wiping away her previous words.

“Should be fine. Some parts are missing though, do you know where I can get parts?” He asked her, and she bring;s out her book from her jeans pocket. Flipping through finding a directory.

She takes the whiteboard from him. “There’s a hardware store one mile up the road.” She tells. She pretends to write on her arm.

“Make a list.” She sign’s, he nodded his head understanding, he took the whiteboard from her, holding it back up.

“Did you break something in there?” He ask’s.

Her eyes widened, embarrassed. She leaned over taking it from him. “I got mad and kicked the panel.” She write’s.

He covered his mouth to stifle his laugh, She rolled her eyes at him. “I'm sorry.” He signed to her, she shrugged.

“What did you do before this?” He asks on the whiteboard. She smirked, taking from him, drawing a stick figure of a man with a gavel and robe.

“You were a judge?” He write’s.

She shook her head. “Lawyer.” She corrects him. He nodded his head, so that’s what she meant when she said client’s. He thinks’.

“What were you?” She asks him, he smirks, taking the whiteboard from her. “Fighter Pilot.” He tells her, she nodded impressed.

“Have you ever shot a plane down?” JJ asked him, he took the board from her quickly writing down. “I have.”

“How did you get the name ‘’Fanboy’?” She wonder’s, he rubbed the back of his neck, looking at the cabin of the boat.

He take’s the whiteboard from her. “I will tell you later, I can't explain this way.” He says, she shrugged.

“Cool, are you almost done for the day?” She asks him, he leaned back thinking. “A few more checks, should be good.” He write’s.

“Get to it.” She signed, he furrowed his brow at her signing.

She sat up pointing to the cabin again, he nodded his head standing up walking back inside. She sighed again. She glanced over her shoulder, catching a glimpse of his henley slowly moving with his muscle’s. She cleared her thoughts quickly looking away.

⏁⏁⏁

THE BIT OF stray sunlight shines above the steel mill, the small amount of lights dim lit the basement. She marked off on her notebook, sitting on the bottom half of a bucket. She kept a mental note of which tool she would have to take with them tomorrow.

He laid down on the car seat, boredly reading through his ASL book. He had at least memorized ten word’s, the silence air between the both of them was gnawing at him. She wasn't the most talkative person, he could tell.

He sighed loudly. She shook her head, as she returned her attention to her writing. He dropped the book on his chest, dropping his head looking at her. She drops her pencil, turning around looking at him.

“Alright pretty brown eyes, what do you want?” JJ teases him. He resists a smirk at her nickname, he sits up closing his book.

“I'm bored.” He says bluntly.

She shrugged. “Find something to do.” She gesture’s around, he shakes his head.

“Do what? I don't know what this place is,or even who you are.” He point’s out, she crossed her arms over her chest.

“Look I just..want something to do, and I will leave you alone till then.” He proposed.

Her brows furrowed as she thought. She sighed defeated. “Fine, you want something to do?” She repeated his answer, he nodded.

“Follow me.” She orders him, standing up quickly at a fast pace down the hall.

“Come on pretty boy.” She urged, he got to his feet following her down a hallway. She unclipped the flashlight from the wall as the light from above faded away. She pulled her arm’s closer to herself as they kept walking.

“So what is this place?” He asked her, she inhaled.

“Ryan & Edward’s steel mill, founded in 1939, at the tail end of the depression when World War || was starting.” Jasmine explained to him.

“Ran until 1988, Steel Crisis shut them down for good, and it didn't help that the place was a walking death trap at point’s.” She explains, he nodded listening to her smooth voice. She stops at a room with cabinet file’s and a desk.

“If it’s such a death trap why are you here?” Mickey wonder’s leaning against the door frame. She chuckled weakly.

“I don't think I really care if inhaled spores kill me, it would be better than..well you know.” Jasmine admit’s, she shivered as she walked in the office.

She walked over to the desk, pulling on the cabinet with a tug. She grunted, it didn't budge. She peaked over the desk.

“Can you help over here?” She asked him, he dropped his arm’s getting next to her, his grip on the desk handle tight.

“Ready?” He asked. The both of them grunt in effort, the draw came unloose. She stumbled back against him, she put her hand against his chest stopping herself, she cleared her throat turning around, getting on her knees digging through.

“What are we looking for?” Mickey ask’s, she holds the flashlight in her mouth, mumbling to him.

“What?” He ask’s, she rolled her eyes pulling it out.

She wiped the back off, handing the tool to him. “I came in here a month ago, it was late and found these old journal’s down here.” Jasmine tell’s him.

“I found a lot of thing’s down here too, kid’s used this place as a hangout so there is stuff littered here from each decade.” She explains to him, her arm’s covered in goosebumps as she rummages through the drawer.

“Look in one of those file cabinets, you can find some old stuff.” She tells him, he nodded his head, he easily opened it digginging through the past.

“You don't mind me asking.” He speaks up, he looked over his shoulder at her.

“How do you know so much about this place?” He wonder’s.

“Well on top of being a partner with a law firm, I had to study up on lawsuit’s.” She recall’s to him, he furrowed his brow.

“What happened here then?” He asked.

“Funny enough, it was a guy smoking, and reading a porno magazine on his break, he fell over the railing breaking his leg, and he sued his foreman.” She tells him, he shook his head with a smirk.

“That is so dumb, how did it end?” He ask’s, she shrugged again. “They settled out of court for 6, 000, which in the 1950's was a lot I guess.” She chuckled.

She pulled out a bundle of photos, and a journal. “Find anything?” She asked him.

“Old magazine’s, couple photos and…. no way.” He gasped in surprise, he pulled out a plastic baggy with green twigs and dirt, she raised a brow as he smiled in excitement.

“How old do you think that is?” Jasmine ask’s him. He flipped the bag examining it. “I don't know.” He is excited.

“You wanna find out?” He challenged, she shook her head, his shoulder’s slump.

“Oh come on, please.” He pleaded with her.

“It's probably not even good.” She tells him. He steps forward, a cockeyed smile at the edge of his lip’s. “Won't know till we try it.” He says.

“Oh so it’s we now?” She wonder’s. He shrugged, with a soft grin. She inhaled looking away from his stare.

“Okay, if I find paper, we can roll one.” She tells him, he smirks. She turned around, opening the sliding desk top. Basic supply’s of an office, a rectangular object catches her attention.

“Huh?” She says out loud. Mickey raised a brow.

“What is it?” He wonder’s leaning against the filing cabinet, she holds it up. On the paper line of the tape written in faded marker. Hollywood’s Classic Mix, and some more. she smirked.

“I found a radio.” She says to him.

Oh fuck yeah.” He agreed, she chuckled softly at his excitement. He walked out of the room with an extra step in his pace. She picked up the journal and photos following him out of the room.

⏁⏁⏁

THE TWO OF them laughed, after she had cooked up an old can of beef broth with carrots, the both of them rolled a joint sharing it. She scrunched her nose as she slowly inhaled the plant, she no doubt knew it was gonna stink up the space they occupied with their cots. 

“Ugh this stuff suck’s.” Jasmine coughed, leaning over handing it back to him. He chuckled at her reaction. 

“So where are you from?” Mickey asked her, she chuckled looking down at her feet in her Tom’s.

“West Virginia.” She answered. He nodded his head. 

“Alright, how does a girl from West Virginia get in a place like this?” He teased, she smirked, she messed with the coils at the back of her neck. 

“My parents.” She says. 

“Were they lawyer’s too?” He wondered, she shook her head. “Mom was a doctor, Dad was an auto mechanic.” She tells him 

“Yeah really broke the mold on that one.” She remark’s, he inhaled the joint. Coughing holding his chest as he handed it back to her. 

“What about you, pretty boy? Where are you from?” JJ asked him, he smirked. 

“Florida.” He answered. She scoffed. “Not surprising.” She tells him. He raised a brow. 

“What does that mean?” He wonder’s, she shrugged. “You seem like the kind of person who lived in ‘Happier State’.” She states. He smirked, his cheek’s growing warm. 

“Right there.” She point’s, his smirk turned into a grin at teasing.

“What?” He ask’s between his laughs. 

“That..that..your million dollar smile, like how do you do that?” She wonder’s, her lips parted trying to stop her smile. 

“The world has ended, and you still are smiling like everything is good.” She admits. 

He shrugged. “I don't know..I just always smile.” Mickey guessed, she shook her head. 

“They may have taken our sound..but they can't take away our smile’s.” He state’s, he chuckled lightly. 

The soft glow from the barrel fire illuminated an orange hue on his face, his teeth practically shining in the light. Her lip’s formed a soft smile as she gazed on him, on his face she could see smile lines at the edge of his lip’s. 

She looked down. “You're kind of right on that one.” She mumbled, she inhaled on the joint again letting out the same cough.

She leaned over the car seat to him, giving him the joint. She shivered, bringing her arm’s closer to herself. It was March outside, the cool would creep down on some night’s from the shaft above that gave access to the soundproof basement. 

She gasps from surprise at the sudden feeling of someone hand on her skin, goosebumps flooding her arm’s as warm cloth wrapped around her. On both of her shoulders, a navy blue zipper jacket laid unzipped. She glanced at him, he smiled softly.

“Thank you.” She whispers while signing to him. He moved hand back and forward, and away from his chest. Jasmine smirked impressively at the man.  Your Welcome

“Your signing is better.” She commented, he looked away as his face no doubt became redder at her complimenting. He looked down at the joint in his hand. 

“Are you even feeling anything from this thing?” He wondered, looking at her brown eyes, she looked down at herself. She shook her head.

“80’s weed sucks.” He remarked, he tossed it into the fire. 

The both of them leaned back in the car seat, the soft sound of the fire cracking blending with music that slowly played from a radio beside her feet. She closed her eye’s, she fought against the tiredness in her body desperately, she couldn't sleep, she needed to take watch. 

“Fuck.” She mumbles, rubbing her eye’s. He glanced at her, the warm light bringing out her dark features. “What?” He whispered. 

She shook her head.  “I'm trying not to sleep.” JJ admits her voice is quiet.

“Why?” He whispered, she looked over at him. Her dark brown eyes soften.

“I’m supposed to be on watch, remember to protect you.” She tells him, he sits up. 

“You can sleep, I’ll take the first watch.”Mickey reasure’s her, she shook her head.

“No, you're my responsibility.” JJ state’s, his heart skipped a beat at her determination. 

He shook his head. “Well you can't protect me if you are tired.” Mickey chuckled, she shook her head no again. 

“I'll be fine.” She reassured him, stubborn. She stands up to her feet, walking past him. “Jasmine.”

He says, his calloused hand reaching out grabbing her wrist. Her stomach went wild at the warm contact from his hand, his touch gentle as he looked up at her. 

"Sorry.” He apologized, her breath hitched in her throat as she looked at him.

“You've done enough..just sleep.” He says to her in a whisper. Her heart began to race as he pleaded with her, his soft brown eyes practically beginning to concede. She pant’s nodding her head. 

“Okay.” She says. She grabs at the jacket around her shoulder, handing it to him.

“No, you take it for tonight.” He assured her. She smiled softly. 

“Um..good night then.”JJ say’s to him, tripping on her word’s. She walks away slipping her arm’s through the hole’s of the dark clothing item. She lays on her cot that is laid across from his, she brings her nose to the navy fabric of the jacket.  

Deeply inhaling the scent, she could smell hints of the earthy and bit’s of what she thought was apple, she smirked against the cloth as she nuzzled herself into her sleeping bag. Her mind raced with many thoughts.

⏁⏁⏁

SHE STUCK her arm out bored as she walked along the dock. The last two days she had been playing guard to him as he fixed the coast guard boat. She was also doing the most she could to not share the same room with him for as much as she could.

She had been wrestling with herself over the obvious crush that was forming. She knew exactly why she was growing feelings so fast and she hated it. The world had ended and she had been starved of human contact for so long, and clearly anyone who was as lonely as she was would enjoy the company of someone happy like him. 

She spun on her heels, walking back. She twisted her wrist with a knife. The boat rocked back and forth as he walked out of the cabin. He leaned over, lightly tapping the wood making her turn around to face him. 

“What’s up?” She sign’s, he smirked, glancing back into the captain’s cabin. She raised a brow at his grin. He was always smiling. This time was different.

“Is it done?” She asks him. 

He nodded his head. She put her knife back into her sheath, she excitedly walked back to him, being mindful of the noise her feet would make if she jumped onto the boat. She reached out her hand for him to help. 

He guided her onto the docked boat. She gasped as her foot slip’s off the edge, almost touching the water. She sighed in relief, thankful he had a hold of her arm’s. She glanced up at him, quickly looking away as the heat rushed to her face. 

He led her inside. “It should work.” He signed slowly, she nodded impressed.

He reached out to touch the ignition key, her eyes widened as she gripped his hand tight. He whipped his head around, confused at her action. 

“Too Loud!” JJ signs, his lips parted nodding his head. “Sorry.” He says she released her grip on him. 

“Tomorrow.” She promises him.

“We leave tomorrow.” She swears, he nods his head. 

“Let’s get out of here.” JJ signs, he furrows his brow again. He watched her leave, picking up her backpack as she pulled herself back up onto the dock, he smirked to himself. 

They quietly walked next to each other, looking around at the desolate San Diego. She looked down sadly passing by shop’s that were overgrown with vines and leaves. She had moved to the city when she was fourteen, she hated her parents for it. 

She couldn't stand the crowdedness of the inner city, and she hated how close they were to the ocean. Did Not help people made fun of her for being from the south, and how she looked. She guessed the joke’s on them now since she is still alive. 

He tap’s her shoulder. “You okay?” Mickey asked her, she nodded her head. 

“Just thinking.” She signed slowly, gesturing to her head.  “About?” He ask’s her, she shrugged. 

She grabs the whiteboard from her bag, writing with the expo quickly. “How everything is gonna change soon.” She writes. 

He took the whiteboard from her. “Where are we going?” Mickey wonder’s. She bit her lip at the use of we, sighed, taking it back from him. 

“There is an island, rumored to be filled with survivors, about five mile’s south of the marina.”  She wrote in bold, his brows furrowed at her explanation. 

“Is it true?” He write’s, she shrugs, taking it back from him. “I don't know.” She admitted. 

“We are gonna find out right?” JJ asks him, her question mark on the end big for him. He smiled warmly at the use of we. “Yes.” He signed to her. 

⏁⏁⏁

SHE DUG THROUGH her bag, rolling her eye’s frustrated, they had finished off the final can of spaghettios she had. He looked up from his book over at her, his brow rose. He sit’s up placing his book on his knee. She grunted frustrated, as he kept digging.

“What are you doing?” He ask’s her, she looks over her shoulder at him. She sat on the dirty floor showing her backpack.

“I'm looking for something i was saving for a rainy day.” JJ tell’s him.

“You have better weed in there?” Mickey teased, she rolled her eyes playfully.

“No pretty boy, I have alcohol in it.” She says bluntly, his eyes widened at her snark.

“I was saving it for when I.” She stops mid-sentence, she pat’s her leg. “When I got out of here.” She stammered, he nodded his head.

She looked at her plastic container on the ground, she could see the orange lid covering the top of the brown liquid. She smirked.

“Found it.” She whispered. She ripped out a bottle of whiskey, the labeled ripped half way that he couldn't tell what brand it was.

“I thought you were kidding.” He laughed at her, she shook her head.

“No, I've been saving this bad boy for two month’s.” She says excitedly.

“Bad news is we have to share it, so don't expect guests.” JJ tell’s him. She grunt twisted the cap breaking the seal of the liquor. She leaned her head back as the ripe fruity taste went down her throat.

She scrunched her nose up. She pulled the dark green button down closer as she walked over to him, sitting on the opposite side of the car seat, handing the drink bottle over to him.

The radio softly played the mixtape she had found. Occasionally a voice would play from the tape, saying who requested what song and why it's there.

“Ill take my chances.” He tell’s her, he leaned his head back taking a swig of the fruity drink. His nose scrunched up closing his eyes. “Wow.” He say’s.

“How old is this?” He ask’s her, she shrugged taking it from him. “How far into the apoulpse are we?” JJ ask’s him.

“Two years.” He guessed, she smirked. “Two years old.” She remarks, she laughs as she takes another drink.

She gagged, holding her mouth. “You know what, don't know why I thought this was a good idea.” She grumbled, handing the drink back to him.

“So Fanboy.” She speaks up, drawing out his callsign. He perked up

“Enlighten me, how did you get a name like that?” She ask’s, he rubs the back of neck licking his lips.

“Thought you would have figured it out?” He says, she shakes her head, running her fingers through her curly hair.

“I'm not that smart.” She admits.

“Bullshit!” He exclaimed with a laugh. Her face grew red at his compliment. “Sorry.” He apologized to her.

“I kind of have a tendency to get loud.” He explains, she raised a brow.

“Like I'm the one who gets everyone hyped up.” He tells her, she smiled nodding her head.

“That makes sense, I mean you can't even talk up there, and you say so much.” She say’s to him, she furrowed her brow. “Hope that makes sense.” JJ mumbled.

“It did.” He says. He leaned his back again taking a swig of the alcohol. He groaned holding his mouth. Jasmine laughs at him.

“What about you?” He ask’s her, her heart skipped a beat. “What about me?” She wonder’s, he sits up handing it over to her.

“What were like before this all started?” Mickey wondered, she shook her head.

“I was quiet, I never really went out, I only hung out with some friends.” Jasmine recall’s.

“Actually, funny enough my favorite people to hang out with were my parent’s.” She chuckled warmly, biting her lip.

“My dad was always good with people and my mom, she was funny.” She recall’s.

“Aren't all mom’s?” He wonder’s. She shook her head.

“I guess but they weren't my mom.” She says to him, she looks down as her arm’s become cold. She sighs heavily.

“What about you? What were you like?” Jasmine wonder’s, she takes the drink from him, taking a swig from the alcohol.

“How was your family?” She asks him. He laughed and leaned back against the car seat. The Radio playing a soft rock song filling the air.

“Honestly..I wish I was able to stop, like there were point’s everyone told me to shut up.” Mickey admit’s. He sighed, his eyes looking down at the cold concrete.

“But I didn't used to be that way.” Mickey says to her, she listens intently at his confession.

“Believe it or not, I wasn't everyone’s favorite person in middle school.” He recall’s.

Her eyes widened at him. “No way.” She says, he nodded.

“Yeah I was either too loud or too quiet, it really messed me up.” He says to her. She looked down sadly.

“And girl’s didn't want to go to the dance with the boy who rode the bench all year.” He recalled.

“My a’ma though, you would have liked, she was always good with people, and making them happy.” He smiled softly. Her lips began to form a smirk at seeing him, a glint of a tear in the corner of his dark brown eyes.

“She had this crazy horse laugh, and she was so tough but she always meant well.” His voice broke at the end, his breath shook as he leaned over taking the alcohol from her. His face mute as he took a swig from it.

“You know what fucking suck’s about this world now?” His voice grim, she looked down at her finger’s as cold wash over her body. He shook his head as his lip’s formed a thin line.

“I have never felt so alone in my entire life.” He admitted, turning his head to face her.

“This world is so goddamn lonely… it’s suffocating.” His breath shook at his last word’s.

She hadn't thought about it. How it must have been for someone like him, to go from having everyone to having no one. Living in a world where you once thrived off social interaction and now all that’s left is living to die.

The radio scratched over as a voice began on the other end.

“This next song Slider suggested, who knew he was the romantic type?” A male voice teased, static on the radio play as grunt is heard on the other end.

“Shut up Hollywood.” Another voice scolded me.

“I'm just saying you have taste, don't be so harsh.” The man proclaimed. A soft piano began to play as the voice on the other end faded out. A soft old motown song she recognised from the moment she heard it. Bring It On Home To Me.

Jasmine look’s to the man on her left. His smile was gone as he stared down the bottle in his hand. She sighed, getting to her feet.

“Dance with me.” She says to him, her voice clear. He looked up at her, his brow’s furrowed.

“What?” he asked, confused. She took a deep breath. “I'm giving you what middle school you didn't get.” She says to him, extending her hand.

“Now get your ass up.” Jasmine teased him. He sighed in defeat, extending his hand, she pulled him up from his spot. He sat the bottle down.

She smirked, placing her hands behind his neck. His hand’s practically engulfed both sides of her waist, her heart raced in her ear’s as the blood rushed to her face at his actions. The both of them began to sway gently to the music.

it didn't seem like danger was near. It was just the both of them,that what only mattered was this moment with the two of them. The heat of the barrel fire illuminated their shadow’s onto the factory pillar’s. The figure’s on the wall are copying their slow movement’s.

“So this is what I missed out on huh?” He teased in her ear, vibrating against her skin. She scoffed softly.

“More or less.” She whisper’s.

He removed one of her hand’s from his neck, taking it his own. Leading their dance away from her control. She could swear her heart almost stopped.

“Alright Swayze, you got move’s.” Jasmine teases him softly. She chuckled, the feeling of his finger’s laced with her own sent shockwaves through her. Smile peaking through, radiating with a sense of peace.

“Oh I've got a lot move’s, baby.” He flirted, she bit her lip shaking her head. He took their tangled hand, spinning her around. A laugh left her as she twirled back to him.

“You are so lying about not going to a dance.” Jasmine say’s between her laugh’s. He shook his head.

“I didn't say I stopped dancing.” He point’s out, their chest touching as the song slowly began to end. Their brown eyes locked, Her breath hitched in her throat as goosebumps flooded her body.

His eyes glanced at her lip, his gaze so soft it made her stomach flutter. His hot breath peppered her face as the gap between them started to diminish. She panted as she slowly pulled away.

“Should be sleeping.” She whispered to him, clearing her throat. The heat rushed to her face as she rubbed the back of her neck. His black brow’s furrowed, puzzled.

“Long boat ride tomorrow.” She chuckled weakly.

“Yeah.uh, I should get to it.” Mickey say’s, copying the same false laughter as her. She picked up the bottle from the ground, putting it back in her crate.

You are such a coward, she scolded herself. She shook her head as she put away stray objects, and grabbed her knife from her holster. She changed her clothes in the corner she deemed her makeshift closet with her clothe;s hung to dry. She slipped her black shirt over her head, pulling her adida’s sweatpants that had been ripped at the knee.

Of course a guy who clearly wanted to kiss you, you didn't even kiss him. Her eye’s closed as she shook her head. She walked back to where both of their cot’s lay near one another, their sleeping bag’s unmade from the night before.

She sighed as it creaked with the weight of her body, she tucked herself into a sleeping bag, holding her arm’s close to herself. Still wearing the jacket he gave her, basking in its sweet earthy smell. She closed her eyes as she tried to shut her brain off.

The sound of light scratched across the floor fill’s the dead air, the familiar creaking of the cot made her heart race in chest. Heat began to rise against her spine, the warmth made her shiver. She turned her body over, her brown eye’s fluttering open.

They stared at each, neither daring to state the obvious between the both of them. His hand caressed her bare arm slowly trapsing to her face.

Her heart dropped as she finally leaned in, closing the gap between them. His hand gently held the side of her face as their lips moved with one another.

Jasmine inhales deeply as her fingers toy with small hair she could feel. His hands began to wonder at her body .

She ran her fingers to the hair tie that held back his curls. His hands gripped both sides of her hip's, pulling closer to him.

She finally pulled away, panting as she tried to catch her breath leaning her forehead against his. She could feel him smiling.

Jasmine looked him in his eyes, his hot breath peppering on her face. She unzips her sleeping bag, crawling over to him.

His hand holding her as her legs staddled his waist, he sits up the cot creaking with their weight shift. She inhaled deeply as she continuing to kiss him, their body's rocking with each other.

Jasmine's hand snagged the tie in his hair pulling it out with on hand. Running her fingers through his dark curls, gently pulling at them.

His hot breath grazed her as his lips began attacking her neck. She gasped closing her eyes as he held her with both his hands.

Her fingers ran down his back down to the hem of his grey t shirt, trying pull it over his head, he pulled back for a moment removing it for her. She contained her shock at his shirtless appearance.

She had seen him without it before, only she tried to be respectful as she was trying to patch up his wound. She caressed his face as she brought lips back to his.

Her heart raced in her chest. She bit her lip stifling a moan he worked down her neck, sucking on the loose skin of neck, for sure leaving a hickey.

His hand snuck under her shirt, his touch sending shockwaves through her. She pulled back, quickly as she could pulling her shirt over her head, leaving her in a purple brallete.

He looked her up and down. His brows furrowed as he looked at a dark pink fragment on her side. An almost perfect bullet. She panted glancing down seeing where is eyes were looking.

"How..did? He whispered, she shook her head. "it doesn't hurt." She reasures him.

His thumb grazed across the scar. "Are you sure..I don't wanna do if you-" She cuts him off by bringing her lips to his.

Quickly pulling back. "I'm okay." She says, him. His brown eyes are dark with a glint of danger.

"Just don't stop." She orders him with a mischievous smirk. With the go ahead he followed her commend. The fire still illuminated their shadows.

⏁⏁⏁

THE SUN gleaned down at the entwined couple. He held her from behind with his arm draped across her waist, his grip had been iron tight before he fell asleep. She had been awakened before he was, her mind racing with the night’s event and what was happening today. She sighed.

She moved her hand to remove his from her waist, trying to roll to her own cot. He mumbled into his pillow, she pulled his arm off her again as she tried to get away again. His grip tightened as he pulled her back to him.

“Five more minutes.” He mumbled. She shook her head, her finger’s grazing him. “The Sun is out.” Jasmine whisper’s to him.

“So?” He asked, his voice vibrating her shoulder. She bit her lip.

“We are gonna lose daylight, and that's not good.” Jasmine say’s, he grumbled some word’s into her shoulder.

“Why do we have to leave now? Can't we just stay here?” Mickey wonder’s, his voice deepened from sleep. She sighed sadly. “Not if you're being hunted, remember.” She says.

He sighed defeated. “It's a nice thought though, but this isn't a home.” She reminds him.

“Make it one then.” He suggests, she shook her head, she took his hand in her own, kissing his knuckles. “You are kind of cute like this.” She comment’s.

“Kind of? What is that supposed to mean?” He teased, his hand snagged the end of her hips, she flinched from the tickling of his fingers across her bare skin.

“Stop please.” She begged between her laughs.

“Mick, I'm serious.” She playfully elbowed his chest. He groaned. “Fine.” He whispered in her ear, she grinned as he kissed her shoulder.

The weight of the cot shifted as he got up, she could hear him shuffling around, the sound of his clothes being pulled over him. Jasmine brought her nose to his pillow, inhaling his scent as much as she could from the cloth. Her skin felt like it was buzzing from the nights event’s, she had gone a while without the comfort of another human it was like she was awakened.

She sits up, shuffling around for her bra and underwear. She pulled her henley over her t-shirt, her black sweatpants slid up over her legs. She looked over to her makeshift table, he stood over the wooden table, his shoulders tense as stood looking down.

She stood up, holding her arm close to herself as she strided over to him. “Are you making breakfast this time?” She ask’s him, he didnt respond.

Her brow’s furrowed. “Mick?” She speak’s up, chuckling. He didnt speak up, simply sighing deeply.

“Mickey?” She ask’s, he turns around leaning against the table. His face stone cold as he stared her down, his brown eye’s dark in anger.

“You lied to me.” He spoke, his voice flat. Her heart dropped at the venom in his words. He holds up a single piece of paper, in the middle was a hand drawn image of herself with the word’s underneath. Wanted Dead or Alive, Murder.

Her heart sank to her stomach. His breath shook as he lowered his hand, his jaw tensed.

“Mick, I can explain.” She stammered, he shook his head.

“Who did you kill?” He demanded, she lifted her hand’s up. “I.I didn't kill anyone.” She stuttered.

“Then why does it say that? Why is your face on a wanted poster?” He asked, his voice angry. She shook her head. “Have you been lying to me this whole time, who is looking for you?” He ask’s.

“My ex-fiance!” She exclaimed, his mouth parted agape at her answer. She crossed her arms as her body grew hot.

“The leader of the bandit’s.” She tells him.

“What?” He whispered confusedly, she nodded her head. “Yeah…and the person I ‘killed’ ..he was the one who did it.” She confessed.

“So yes, I am a liar.” Her voice was flat with anger.

“Sorry to disappoint you, pretty boy.” She smeared. She turned around to walk away.

“Wait!” He says, she stopped at the sound of his voice breaking.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered to her.

“Tell me everything.” He says, she turned around facing him. His face had softened as he gazed at her.

“Please.” He pleads with her, she sighed as her arm’s tightened. They both walk over to the car seat that serves as a couch. She sat opposite side of him, her breath shake as she runs her fingers through her hair.

“A few months ago my parents and I found this group of survior’s lead by a preacher.” Jasmine starts off, she leaned back against the seat.

“And it was fine, we all lived in this nice community of people, we were happy.” She recall’s.

His brows knitted as he listened to her. “Until the man leading it began to say that the alien’s were sent from God, and that we failed him.”

“My Fiance, before this world he was someone who was easy to anger, and he proposed the idea of appeasing them.” Jasmine admits, his brows furrowed.

“Appeasing.” He say’s.

“You mean sacrificing?” He corrected, and she nodded her head. His heart skipped a beat as his blood ran cold.

“I thought he was just saying it because he was terrified, saying what he thought would be right.” She tells him, her chest heaved as her heart dropped.

“The leader of the group refused, and the next day, Ronan found him hanging in the courtyard.” She tells him.

“Did he do it?” Mickey ask’s, she shakes her head.

“Honestly I don't know.” her voice shook.

“Ronan became the leader, and he started making good people do terrible things, corrupting them and twisting their mind’s.” She says, her brown eyes grim.

“They started to round up survivors, some they would take and auction off, people would become a part of the killer’s, some entertainer’s.” She tells him, she licked her lips, wiping her face.

“Other’s they would take out and leave for bait, drag them out to the river, and force them to scream so the monster’s would hear them.” She sighed, he blinked in disbelief.

He was counting himself lucky he never met them before she saved him. What they would have done to him if they found him.

“That's awful.” He says, shaking his head. She wiped away a tear. “I wanted to leave, and so did my parent’s.”

“And I didn't fully agree with the idea of leaving until he…auctioned off a child to become a sacrifice.” Her voice broke, his fingers laced with her as he held it in comfort. She gulped as she counted on.

“My parents rounded up a group of survivors, and we left in the middle of the night heading for the marina. My mom had heard talk of an island run by a naval man.” She recounted.

“Right when we got to the water, Ronan and his cronies found us, he forced my father and I on our knees.” She looked up at the dirty ceiling, the sunlight reflecting the tears that were starting to fall.

“He forced my mother to choose between us, if she chose my father then I would be forced to stay with Ronan and be compliant with everything he asked of me.” She bit her lip, making it bleed. The copper tasted filling her mouth.

“Or choose me, and my dad would be auctioned off, mostly likely as a sacrifice.” Her heart pounded as a lump formed in her throat.

“And my mom she was always so selfless.” She recall’s, the past tense of her word’s made chill’s run down his spine.

“She turned around and told everyone to run before she..” Her voice broke again as tear’s stained her brown cheek’s. She licked the blood away from her lips.

“Before she screamed.” Mickey’s jaw dropped agape. She covered her mouth as she held back the tears that flooded her.

“That’s not even the worst part.” She croaked.

“Me and another girl, we were running together away from him, and he shot her with an arrow right through the heart.” Jasmine’s pant’s as her mind flashed with image’s.

“He shot me too, but I got away after I made a noise.” She wiped her eye’s again, the tear’s didnt stop. “So they aren't hunting you Mickey.” His name rolled off her tongue.

She turned to face him. “They are hunting me.” She admits.

His arms wrapped around her bringing her into a tight embrace. His finger’s held the back of her curl’s as another arm held her shoulders. His body radiated with warmth as he whispered soothingly into her ear. The tears fell from her face dying his shirt.

“I’m so sorry.” His voice says softly in her ear. She sniffled, Ronan had not shown her that comfort in so long, she had forgotten what it was like for someone to care about her.

“That's why you need to leave.” She whispers to him. His brows knitted in confusion. “What?” He pulled away holding her shoulders.

“You should leave me, take the boat, leave me to deal with Ronan.” She state’s, he shook his head.

“Not happening.” He declares.

“You stay with me, you will die, and I can't let another person die because of me.” She stated, he shook his head.

“Jasmine I'm not leaving you.” He says to her, he is filled with determination.

“I made a promise to you, I will get you out of here.” He stated.

“I swear on my life.” Mickey start’s.

His hands running down to arms.” Nothing or nobody will fucking lay their hand’s on you.” He promised her, her lips parted as she embraced him once more. Both holding each other as the morning sun shone.

⏁⏁⏁

THE BOTH OF THEM WALKED next to each other, their backpacks filled with everything they could carry. She carried most of her own thing’s to make it easy on him. He writes on the whiteboard hold it up to her.

“How was it?” It read, she furrowed her brow’s in confusion. “What?” She asked.

He smirked, writing down more. “What we did last night.” he wrote, her face grew red.

“The sex?” Jasmine asked him, he nodded his head. She rolled her eyes at his question.

“That’s really what crossed your mind?” She jokingly asks him. His brows furrowed

He write’s again. “Good or bad?” He wondered, she shook her head. She takes it from him. “You're a dork.” She write’s. He smiled, taking it from her.

“It was that good then.” He Jokes, she rubbed her face. She fought the smirk on her lips. She was almost thankful he found her wanted poster, the weight on her body was gone and she didn't feel like she had to hide again.

She took it from him. “Dork.” She wrote in bold letters, his face grew red as he took it from her.

Before heading to the boat they needed supplies from a boat shop right by the marina, only a swim from their boat. She wasn't sure how much gas was in the boat. She knew it would take a good amount of gas to get to the island.

Her feet scraped to a stop, the water rocked softly against the concrete. Jasmine turned to look at him, taking the whiteboard again.

“Look for anything that we can use.” She orders him, he nods his head.

“What about you?” He signs, she smirks in approval at his signing.

“Find what I can.” She says to him, he nod’s walking inside. She walked on the other side of the garage letting her hand traipse across.

He grabbed a bottle of lighter fluid, tucking it away into his bag. Items left behind were still on the shelves. He guessed that people didn't really care about supply’s in the apocalypse, he hoped that he could find a type of radio to play music for her again. Seeing it was something made her happy, he liked seeing her smile at least.

A creaking sound pulled him out of his thought’s, he looked around him, his finger’s grazing over the leather of his knife holster. He slowly walked into the store, the hair’s on his neck raising as light footsteps patterned around him. Didn't sound heavy enough to be Jasmine.

He unsheathed his knife, looking down at the concrete, the shadow of someone casting through the isle’s. He pant’s as rounded the corner ready to face someone. His brown eyes drifted down to a smaller teen, their face hidden behind their long hair. Holding their knee’s close to their chest as they rock back and forth.

Mickey’s brow furrowed in confusion. They whispered to themselves continuing to rock. He couldn't ask if they were hurt, he sat his knife back in his holster. Bending down to their level.

“Hey, it's okay.” He whispers softly, they didn't look up. He put his hand on their shoulders to comfort them. “Are you hurt? He wonder’s.

Their blue eyes meet his, a smirk paint’s their face. He gasped for air as something around his throat restricts his breathing. He clawed at his neck as a tight scratch object tightened more and more forcing him up.

Jasmine’s ears perked up at quiet choking noise. She bend’s down hiding behind an aisle, seeing silhouettes casting above onto the metallic ceiling, the choking growing closer to her. She rolled onto her knees, sliding across the floor.

Hiding against a rack of scent tree’s, she peaked her head around the corner. Her heart stopped as she watched the scene unfold in front of her. His neck wrapped with a rope, being held back by three men, another circling him like a lion to its food.

He grunted against the rope. Jasmine turned around, holding her heart as it raced in fear. She looked around her fearfully. Mickey panted as his brown eyes widened fearfully, the three men’s mouth’s covered by bandana’s hiding their identities.

“Where is she?” Red Bandana asked him, he could only understand the last half. He shook his head pretending to be confused. He could see the fabric move from a smirk underneath.

“Ronan isn't gonna be happy, you and his wife.” Red tell’s him, he grunted in anger at the last word. She wasn't anyone's, not even his.

“What do you fella’s say we do?” He asks the three men, they look at their hostage and their mock leader.

“Kill? Or take it to the boss.” He asks them.

“He laid with his woman, he won't take that.” Blue banana sign’s. He towered over most of them, holding the rope tightly with one. Yellow bandana raised his hands.

“What use is he then?” He wonder’s. Red bandana shrugged in response. “Fucking nothing, we kill him, find the wife.” He order’s.

“How?” Blue wonder’s, red look’s to the water behind them, he gestured with his hands around the post. He nod’s as he pulls the black haired man to the ground, Mickey grunted as he fought against the tightrope that drug him to the water.

Blue wrapped the rope around a post. He picked up the former pilot by his shirt collar. He smeared at his helplessness. Mickey grunt’s as he leaned his head back colliding it with the head of the man who held him back. Blue stumbled back holding his nose as crimson flowed from it.

A bottle rolling on the ground catche’s their attention. Yellow furrowed his brow, walking over picking up the bottle examining it. A Hiland milk bottle, the white liquid beginning to fizz up in his hand, furrowed his brow.

It pop’s for a moment, it combusts in his hand with a boom sending him back, yelling in agony as his skin burns, his crie’s cutting with an inhumane cry that filled the once dead air. Blue bandana stumble’s back holding his eye in pain, in his blind stumbling he colluded with the tied up man, he yelped as he fell back into the cold water.

He grunted as he flayed his arm’s in the water, he choked as his lung’s ached for air. The sound’s above are muffled from the water. He panicked, kicking against the water, his chest aching as he fought desperately to kick to the surface. Pain shot through his entire body as the rope dug deeper into throat, he jolted as the strength began to leave him, slowly the sunlight that reflected on him disappeared as the world turned black.

⏁⏁⏁

MUFFLED GRUNTING fills the air, he could feel a pressure on his chest, plea’s from a person. His eye’s shot open as he coughed up water, gasping for air. He coughed water as the world around him began to form. Metal that rocked softly back and forth.

“Your okay, your okay breath.” A voice soothed him, she sat him up. Her curly hair soaked with water, her henley clung close to her body. She glanced back and forth between him and the cabin of the boat.

“Don’t move, I'm getting you out of here.” Jasmine order’s him, she grunt’s holding her side as she stumbles to stand up.

“Are you hurt?” he whisper’s weakly, she groans in response walking back into the cabin. JJ grunt’s as she fumbled with the gear’s of the boat, putting it reverse. Holding her side as she got herself out of the bay as fast as she could, she grunted as she turned hard.

The wind whipped against the boat as she got further away from the city. She looked at the mirror seeing him leaning back against the seat. He coughed as he looked up at the sky that raced away. He held his side trying to catch his breath.

“Come on, Come on.” She mutters under her breath. The city began to fade from her view, she sighed thankful. She removed her hand from her side looking down at her hand’s, her fingers covered in blood, she grunt’s placing her hand back.

The boat began to sputter. Her brown eyes widened in annoyance. “No, No no please no.” She begged for the machine. It groaned and sputtered coming to a stop, Jasmine exclaimed, hitting the wheel.

She limped out of the captain cabin, she slid next to him. She groans holding her side as she let out a sigh of relief.

“What happened?” He ask’s her, and she blinked slowly. She looked over at him, her chin cut up with blood leaking.

“They tied you up, I made a bomb.” She recall’s, his brow’s furrowed. “You made a bomb?” Mickey asked her, and she nodded her head.

“I took AP Chem for fun, it came in handy now.” She chuckled weakly. He shook his head, pounding from the impact of falling in the water. “Are you okay?” He ask’s her.

“Yeah, I'm fine.” She assure’s him, with her free hand she laced her fingers with his. Leaning on his shoulder. “I’m sorry.” she whisper’s.

“I didn't know they were watching us, we should have filled up yesterday.” Jasmine says to him, he shook his head. “You didn't know, it's okay.” He tells her.

“No it's not because we are now stranded.” She points out, gesturing to the boat. “Better than dead.” He reminds her, she scoffed.

“Well you were technically dead.” Jasmine tell’s him, his heart dropped at her words. “What?! I was dead?!” He exclaimed.

“You were under the water for a whole minute.” She tells him. His mouth parted agape, he couldn't recall much after he passed out in the water.

“The alien’s took two of them out, and tried to get me when I was getting you.” She explains, he looks over to her side, her hand held tightly on her side. Bit’s of crimson shining off of her hand.

“Did they hurt you?” Mickey asked in concern, she shook her head. “Its a flesh wound.” She grit’s, he shakes his head.

“You're bleeding, you're not okay.” He says to her, she shakes her head again. “I've been through worse.” She assure’s him.

“We..we shouldn't be far from the island, I think.” She mutter’s, she shuts her eyes as she slowly sits up straighter. “We can fire a.” She sway’s,

“Jasmine.” He says in concern, she lets go of his hand, standing up slowly. Holding her side tightly. “I'm fine.” She lie’s.

He stands up watching her, she grunt’s limping into the captain’s cabin. Pulling out a white first aid box, removing an orange gun.

“Fire the flare gun.” She mumbled, her eye’s rolling in her head as she swayed around. He quickly got to her side, catching her as she fell over. Gently laying her on the chair, he takes the gun from her hand.

“Jasmine you got to stay awake, okay, eyes on me.” He soothed her, her eyes opened and closed, struggling to keep up. “It’s okay.” She whisper’s.

He grabbed the first aid kit, pulling out gauze and wraps. He lifted up the hem of shirt, ripping off the cover. A long straight gash the size of his middle finger, blood leaking down staining her jeans. He holds the cotton to her wound, holding it tightly.

He takes her hand putting on her own wound. “Hold that there.” He says to her.

“Okay, how did you know that bomb was gonna work?” Mickey asked her, she leaned her head back, her eye’s on the verge of closing. “Hey!” He speaks up, his voice clearer.

“How did you make that bomb?” He wonder’s, she grunt’s. “It was milk and chlorine.” She answers. He chuckled.

“You just carry that on you?” He ask’s, she shrugged.

“Doesn't every girl.” She laughs weakly. He grabs the medical tape, ripping it off with his teeth. Placing it around each square of the bandage. She groaned, gritting her teeth in pain, he looked her up and down. She panted, closing her eye’s.

“Hey, don't do that.” He soothed, lightly patting her face. She shook her head, he smiled softly at her. “You don't get to die on me not now.” He declared, she smirked faintly.

“Didn't plan on it fanboy.” She tells him, he nodded his head. She squinted her eye’s looking out at the water. He turned to see what she was looking at, a faint shadow in the distance, the silhouette of what seemed like two people.

He grabbed the flare gun from her side, taking three of the flares placing one in his pocket.

“I’ll be right back, keep pressure on that.” He ordered her, he brought his lip’s to her forehead. He stood up walking back outside. He aimed the orange weapon up at the sky.

As he pulled the trigger it popped as the flare launched high in the sky, illuminating the midday overcast. His brown eye’s fall to the shadow in the distance, two bright light’s flash in his direction. He smirks. He turned around, getting to her side holding her hand as the shadow slowly got closer to the two survivors.

NO PRESSURE Tagged: @cowboysandpilots @bobfloydssunnies @sugarcoated-lame @sorchathered @fairyheart @swiftsgirlfriend @nouis-bum @senawashere @cottagecori @sebsxphia

[begitalarcos]

Hey Guys

Wow it's been quite some time. In regards to my last life post (that I don't remember making) but did happen and was very difficult to deal with all the fall out for like... more than a month after.

I'm sorry I left you all with that and then just disappeared again. Things have been weird the last couple months... to put it in simple words... shit sucks

The falling out with my daughter caused a huge rift between several people who (were not involved but still had a very loud opinion about things) and quite a few uncomfortable conversations.

I unfortunately started drinking as a way to deal with not dealing with things (I'm good now but I had about 3 weeks of just being smashed on the regular) and during that time I suffered an awful fall which resulted in me slipping a disc in my back. Possibly 2 of them but I've had such a hard time dealing with doctors lately that no one in the medical field has been particularly helpful. So I've been living off a cocktail of painkillers for almost 2 months now (which I hate), I was going to physio but then my insurance decided not to cover my sessions until I could PROVE I was actually hurt.

Tomorrow I go for an assessment with a new doctor to try and get my insurance to cover treatment again, my MRI isn't even until August of next f*cking year. -_-

Our healthcare system is an absolute joke right now.

On top of being in CONSTANT pain (not being able to sit or lie down for very long either cuz I lose feeling in my legs) my daughters disability/mental health program has decided to just... not help anymore until she gets a new assessment. Even though its been almost 3 years and she's still on a waiting list for an adult psychiatrist.

So the last week or so now everyone is coming back to me to try and fix/smooth things out again (after I was basically pushed out of her life because I was "making shit up" and "didn't actually care" and apparently was just being a control freak) and no one has apologized for the way they treated me or forced me out of helping my own kid. Nope. They just expect that now that she has no financial coverage that I should be the one to speak for her again cause they have no idea what to do. -_-

My husband has been solid thankfully, even though his relationship with Sassy has suffered so much because of the people around her who have influenced her... not always for the better. But I at least have maintained a sense of control in a way that's worked for me.

I told everyone who has given me grief for the past couple years about Sassy (including Sassy) that if I am going to advocate for her and get this stuff sorted out that I'm doing it my way, and if I get any push back or flack from anyone - then I'm done. They can figure it out themselves and I wash my hands of it all.

My husband thinks I shouldn't have gotten involved again at all, but I know (and I knew things were gonna blow up eventually) if I don't fix this... its gonna become my problem again anyways.

This past month or so I've had some really good breakthroughs with my therapist about my toxic coping skills, people pleasing and lack of boundaries with family members.

I feel better about things though than I ever have and now that I am standing firm with my boundaries and my convictions its been much easier for me to deal with any gaslighting or potential drama that people have tried to start up with me.

I know this got super long winded and I didn't intend for it to be as rambling and trauma dumpy as it was but - it is good to get things out and clear the air. As I feel like I sort of left an air of weirdness here for quite sometime.

Working on getting back to the things that I enjoy and stop becoming immersed in other peoples drama and things that I can't change.

I've missed you guys and crikey has Tumblr changed since I've been away. But I'm hopeful and I look forward to getting back into fandoms and gif sets and all those things I loved so much again <3

much love to you all

B

[irrealisms]

Game Over. Try Again? liner notes

fic here if you haven't read it!

first thing i want to say is: this fic is heavily inspired by Samsara / 輪迴 by ForgivenMemes. if you're an mdzs fan and can handle the content warnings, go check it out.

some Actual Time Loop (rather than time travel) concepts that didn't get written: zam's last week of the server, from bedrock box to the wormhole. vitalasy on two birds/deliverance day.

however i did a lot of thinking about, like, who or what is causing the time loop? why? how can they break out? and eventually came to an answer: they're the ones causing the time loop, because they just keep trying and trying to make this work, long after it has become obvious that it can't work, because they love each other. so i wrote this instead. i could have given it a happier ending where vitalasy eventually breaks the time loop by Letting Go and Moving On to Season Five but this is thematically speaking ... the story we already got in s4? in canon, at the finale, vitalasy is able to let go of zam and move on to s5. so i wanted to make him a bit worse. also im obsessed with [cycles you cannot break and are trapped in forever].

it had to be vitalasy or zam because subz, after like two loops, would Simply Not Invite Zam. tbh. and out of vitalasy and zam, one of them already has Miscellaneous Glitch Powers, so.

relatedly: you don't get to see much of this in the fic but spoke (a) does not know what, exactly, vitalasy is doing to the server (b) does know that he's doing something. spoke would NOT be happy about the time travel. he worked so hard on the apocalypse!!!! it's the END of season four not the "okay now time to go back a few months". come on vitalasy where's the narrative catharsis

another fun fact from planning: if it had been a time loop proper and not time travel as controlled by vitalasy, they would've suspected spoke as behind it, but it absolutely would not have been spoke. spoke does not care enough about eclipse poly drama to put you in a time loop about it sorry guys

vitalasy paces a lot in this fic. that's a pretty common stressed/trapped animal thing. you see foxes do it a lot, in fur farms or pseudo-sanctuaries or generally abusive living conditions.

he also spins! that's just a vitalasy trait. watch any vod with vitalasy in it from a non-vitalasy pov and note how much he spins. it's a good trait. i wish i had included more of him spinning but i couldn't find a ton of good spots for it so he only spins once.

you know the thing life series fans say. "[character] never left [location]." none of eclipse federation ever left eclipse federation. now you may say, zam did very much leave eclipse federation, it was kind of a big deal that zam left eclipse federation? which is true! however. in the life series sense, none of them left eclipse federation, in that none of them are at all over it.

i think a lot about post-betrayal s4 eclipse federation. they're still hanging onto it. they hang onto it after and despite zam's betrayal, long after it's clear that it can't exist again like it did before. they keep trying and trying and trying even as it only becomes more and more apparent that the trying doesn't help. because they love each other. and that's what this fic is about.

sparrow called this out in the comments but. the multiple meanings of 'zam made their bed'. zam made their bed (physically, he placed it and designed it.) zam made their bed (physically, he made the covers nicer.) zam made their bed (he made this relationship what it was, you can't get rid of him without getting rid of that.) zam made their bed (now lie in it.)

i like the note of vitalasy putting his hearts in a chest for them at the end. he doesn't even know if subz and zam will keep existing in this timeline! and he didn't label it 'for subz'. zam is planning on betraying him that day and he still left the hearts for him, too. man!

also it's in glowing dyed ink to be a little reminiscent of All The Sign Rooms. my beta kelardry added that detail :3

here's a secret: i can, actually, imagine possibilities that went differently and ended up happier for eclipse. (most of them are "vitalasy replays subz's suicide enough that he successfully finds a way to get subz to agree to stay alive".) however, at that point, the fic would become canon divergence rather than time loop, so instead i made subz's suicide more of a fixed point. sorry vitalasy!

[kathystheoriesandmore]

I solved FNAF 1's Original Story (FNAF Theory/Long Post)

So, I made this theory because of the recent 10 year anniversary of the FNAF games, I have been in the fandom since the beginning and I know how crazy it is to create theories for this fandom, so I wanted to go back to the first game again and see if I could maybe figure out the original plot with small details without looking at the other games, since this game seemed to be a stand-alone before FNAF 2 and 3 came out and changed the story to the one we know today. So im only looking at fnaf 1, and nothing else! So please don't attack me with other game info-

Anyways onto the process!

VVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV

To do this I decided to start with just making a list out the known information on Easter eggs and sounds in the game. This led to me also looking over the four News Articles as well as reading the 5 phone calls from the phone guy, (Including the broken static one)

When doing so, I noticed a few strange things in the articles and phone guy calls, that just didn't make sense to me.

The first attention grabbers came from the articles, mainly with wording with the two kids missing, saying the kids were there at “late hours”, which means that they were there, after hours when no one should be around at the pizzeria.

(Photo from fnaflore.com)

There was another part that also confused me with the “Local Pizzeria said to close” where it talks about the local place shutting down, but it seems like it's not just this local pizzeria, it's the entire company. I get this feeling with this quote:

“Despite a year-long search for a buyer, companies seem unwilling to be associated with the company. "These characters will live on. In the hearts of kids, these characters will live on." - CEO”

I might be wrong, and it could be because all the other chain restaurants in the company have closed, but because we can't use any other games to prove anything so im not sure, but I thought that was strange to talk about how this one place is closing, and in the process, the company was closing fully.

~~~

The other parts that caught my interest were when reading Phone Guy’s Night 1, and 5 Calls.

Night 1 has a lot of information, with info on how they do cover up dead bodies, The Bite of 87, and how the robots wander around because it is in their programming but they are buggy, causing them not to walk during the day anymore, as well as the info about how the animatronics are glitched and see humans “after hours” as an endo skeleton, and how being stuffed into the suit, is the thing that kills you, meaning the robots don't bite you, they just stuff you in and the suit-wearing kills you-

...

But, didn't they say someone was wearing the said suit?

Without FNAF 3 explaining spring locks and the way humans could wear the suits there was no possible way for them to wear them, so how could a human wear the suit? The suits, even without an endo, could kill you. So there is no possible way for a human to wear those suits!

With this new information, I then went back and noticed the “after hours” part with seeing humans as endos, and remembered one of the articles saying the kids being there during late hours, and made me think…

what if there was no human killer?

What if, the kids snuck in during late hours and got tricked by highly advanced but buggy robots, and were forced into the suits because they were thought to be endos, and were killed in the process of being put into the suits?

But then, why was someone arrested? And more importantly, why was someone randomly arrested? Well, I think the night 5 phone call can help. On night 5, the phone call quotes:

“Sir, it is lamentable that mass agricultural development is not speeded by fuller use of your marvelous mechanisms. Would it not be easily possible to employ some of them in quick laboratory experiments to indicate the influence of various types of fertilizers on plant growth? You are right. Countless uses of Bose instruments will be made by future generations. The scientist seldom knows contemporaneous reward; it is enough to possess the joy of creative service.” - Autobiography of a Yogi by Paramhansa Yogananda

From my understanding of the quote, it seems to give the info of a man talking to another about how his machines are highly advanced and they wished to use them in a few experiments to see how they will do, then talking about how if they do this, this could be very helpful to the future, even if you don't know who the creator is.

And this, I think, is our biggest hint.

If the bite of 87, did happen at that time, then that means that before 1987 they already had walking animatronics, which was pretty advanced for its time, you could even say sci-fi advanced. Mainly because at least from my research, (might be wrong), the latest a robot was able to walk in our timeline was in the 2000s. There were experimental ones in the 1980s, but even then, from my understanding, it was only old models that failed.

If the same is true for the FNAF 1 world, then that would mean these machines were either highly advanced… or released the the public to interact without telling anyone that they are still experimental. A highly dangerous situation.

If this was the case....

(Summary)

We have a story of a company, probably not on making pizzas, but on making animatronics, and wanting to be on top before everyone else. When doing so, they decided to use a pizzeria as their experimenting grounds and had many accidents, probably more than just the bite of 87, which caused a lot of lawsuits. One of these being kids going missing after hours. The animatronics were the killers and stuffed them into the suits out of glitched code. If this information came out, there could be a chance their entire company would have immediately shut down, but if they had a scapegoat… then there is a higher chance that maybe they could brush this under the rug and put the blame on someone else. So someone random was arrested, leaving the the company to struggle to cover it, and for a while it did work, but people kept thinking of it, causing a struggle to keep in business, making them shut down, leaving us to now.

If this is also the case, we could keep with the Sci-fi theme and say that everything in the game is not actual hauntings, but the robots just glitching out, we could go sci-fi and say it could be the kids as well. But I like to think it's fully just Sci-fi since Scott said in his latest interview with Dawko that he loves Sci-fi and always goes back to it.

-------------

With that, I would also like to say, that there is evidence of this with other media mainly with how we have Mr.Hippo’s speech of him saying “Don’t look too deep into the information” pretty much and with the fact of we recently found out the crying child's (Dave's) name by just looking it over again and realizing how easy it was to solve if we didn't dig too deep for it.

I wonder if all the other info is this easy, of just looking carefully at what is being said, instead of looking into the code and guessing who did the bite, and who the kids were.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

non post here just collecting current thoughts abt the [what's up with atlas' death and the unlikely connection of mitzi and mordecai through some shared secret relating to it] mystery specifically

firstly i'm tending to presume that mordecai did just shoot atlas; he definitely knows that mitzi did Not, "she didn't shoot anyone"....which also i suppose does not necessarily mean that mitzi didn't kill him. it's possible she did, or mordecai did, or someone else did, and by some non [noscoped by mordecai] method, but that mordecai and mitzi then coordinated in covering up how he actually died by, say, quickly staging some kind of other scene, including shooting him while he had only recently died. but really the mystery here is like, what exactly would these two feel so aligned in cause about. doesn't seem like, say, mitzi could've just paid mordecai to take atlas out, b/c mordecai would either not want to do it Or he actually would, in which case why not do it himself, and earlier, since he was at lackadaisy for surely the better part of a decade. it could've been like "with our combined talents imagine how nearly competent we could be" with mitzi having some kind of key knowledge to plan this heist (murder) or something. but it would still require an Alignment between them of wanting him dead Now, and, y'know, why

their particular similarities that we know of, imo, are that they're probably about the same age (supposing mitzi's around thirty / early thirties) and that they're sort of especially Materially Beholden to atlas and more directly, individually collected by him (versus, say, zib saying he's a collected stray because he'd stay around if mitzi did. he's also a saxophonist which is lower stakes than your new wife or your new guy to kill other guys)....neither mitzi nor mordecai seem to posthumously dislike atlas, but naturally mordecai's barely indirectly commented and it seems to me like mitzi regards atlas fairly symbolically, as the potential for her situation to improve, or at least be as good as it was during lackadaisy's heyday. she may have affection for him abstractly, and we also know via mordecai that the marriage was distant enough before atlas died that mitzi didn't live with him and things had Visibly Deteriorated. it sure seems plausible that mitzi might kill him to inherit things, and turned to mordecai for his expertise in a) doing that & b) perchance making it look like an accident / covering things up, but he evidently didn't want to stay on at lackadaisy No Matter What, i.e. if mitzi was running it instead, and why agree to this, it seems very unlikely he'd do anything just for mitzi's sake or the sake of being paid to do it by her, he has to have his own motivation. and it's possible that, despite plausible positive feelings about atlas still (who did also like, throw him right into mortal perilously dangerous work w/little experience lol, mordecai happening to be immediately good at it or not) he could've, like mitzi could've, still wanted to be less beholden to this one particular person, and achieved that by just killing him lol....but even if their feelings Aligned on that matter, there's a few wrenches, like a) how would they realize this alignment. they're probably not having heart-to-hearts. they're both very close to atlas (at least professionally, for mordecai) and it would be very bold to go "would you happen to wanna kill this guy too" either to his wife or his right hand gun hand hook car door man.

there's also the fact that: viktor is Also someone very limited by his being beholden to atlas, pretty much positioned as close to atlas as mordecai since they were partners, and maybe has the added bonus of seeming marginally more Approachable than mordecai, plus that like, being thirteen years older and beat up on more, maybe if you were looking for an accomplice you'd figure that "idk do you want to retire" would also make him marginally more likely to get aboard murder plans if you're just trying to Find someone to help with that who you don't know would already want to. but he also disagrees with the idea that mitzi is particularly vulnerable / isn't herself at least somewhat dangerous, which seems like something he Might have any knowledge about beyond "idk i just get that vibe," like, did he get to be privy at all to whatever went down there. &/or led up to it.

what seems to be implied here, and makes more sense, is that there was some specific event that both mitzi and mordecai consider to have been unfortunate / undesired / things going wrong, and that involves mitzi enough for mordecai to blame her / her to refer to it being her fault, although she may not necessarily agree. (and does "perhaps i will / not to discount your culpability" imply mordecai Also considering himself culpable. whether that goes beyond "if anyone actually shot him, it's mordecai")

but while maybe there's not much love lost between these two, neither seems to like completely hate the other. civil enough one-on-one here, does seem like mordecai would be negatively affected if viktor had died, "very little interest in defending her" is not "no interest" nor "less than no interest and one can imagine mordecai is being both precise and accurate about what he means, and to exit this car chat by advising mitzi fix the conspicuous bulletholes is, in fact, helpful; he's probably not actually interested in / intending to personally dismantle lackadaisy or anything, and makes sense if mitzi's lashing out just a bit while they discuss sore topics (again, seems neither of them Wanted to have to kill atlas either, so what was the specific impetus....) and also they did just have Lackadaisy's Big Night involving foes that have guns while they (almost entirely) don't, thanks to mordecai's transference of those....which, like, did he just do that himself, or was it on order from marigold....either way, seems more like a nudge like Retire Bitch to everyone there, rather than an effort to sabotage them That perilously

there's also this compelling material

not interpreting Bonus Material as the strictest of canon, in some cases more obviously [not at all] than others, ft. generally more of a light tone / elevated humorousness....but also the not obviously complete jokes ones perhaps not Not canon contradictory, either. a) i want to see the shopping trip and b) fascinating how they are outright discussing that mutual Material Beholdenness to atlas. but a couple of other points arising

one being that i was racking my brain like "whaaaat are the usual Murder Mystery Motives" and then landing on "money" wherein like, besides the theory of "what if mitzi just wanted to inherit lackadaisy, while still Actually Married to atlas despite that maybe circling a drain / maybe atlas, being warned about something by asa, was going to get rid of lackadaisy from his inheritable estate," it also occurred to me like, mordecai originally got in hot water as a bookkeeper, which leads me to presume that he may have been embezzling (though maybe he was the fall guy for someone else's embezzlement, or maybe even some third or fourth things, not even involving embezzlement at all) which, if he was, was presumably for his family, whom he left money for (though he also maybe had to skip town too quickly to retrieve it anyways). and there we see that mordecai may have also been bookkeeping for lackadaisy, too, which i'm going to interpret as perfectly canon backstory. i guess this isn't exactly so different from previously mentioned ideas/elements like "both of these two are aware how beholden they are to this one specific guy, and would like to be less so (through embezzling??)" and "this could be about mitzi wanting to inherit lackadaisy much sooner than later (or not at all)" like, still wanting more of some resource atlas has sooner than later (or not at all....see questions of how much mitzi could have been legally considered to Directly possess while atlas was alive, such as, money) with the same kinds of questions raised of like, how would they realize they aligned on this. there's also a question of like, Would mordecai be moved to elevate the flow of funds here versus just whatever he's already paid, though he'd (maybe) already done that in that original bookkeeping gig for whatever reason. but that may have been more time sensitive and motivating if it was indeed at least in part for his family. which i suppose it could still be Now w/the theory of him just turning around and doing that again. wherein i suppose the idea here is just that they're both in on it, and maybe atlas finding out about it / suspecting too much is such a potential impetus like, whoops, well let's kill him :/ hypothetical 2 for 2 lack of embezzling stealth lol

the other more tangential idea here is just that like, well who knows, maybe mitzi and mordecai Did talk / have tête-à-têtes / an unlikely friendship or friendly acquaintanceship going....again that like, even as professional mostly enemies now and with no especial warmth evident between them, they also don't seem to hate each other even though they Could, even when it comes to this secret re: atlas's death that they're both unhappy with....a lot of writing this stuff out is just how it helps get ideas together lol and not lose entire threads / have derailed trains of thought. like maybe mordecai Would do something mostly for mitzi's sake, if evidently at all begrudgingly. and i suppose the other way round could be considered, i.e. if mitzi would begrudgingly commit to helping kill atlas for mordecai's sake, which still seems the less likely arrangement

oh wait Also i sort of rotated freckle & mordecai juxtaposition, as not being entirely dissimilar, see for one: their having the ideal time the one occasion they were in the same place, that is, completely declining to interact with each other at all lol....but i'm presuming the Mystery of freckle's secrets & backstory are a bit less deep than this more central atlas murder secret, and my interpreguess is that freckle accidentally(? probably.) killed someone(? or almost did. or whatever.) probably his dad(? family tragedies....his hat is still on the premises....) and rocky took the blame, which i'm guessing is out of just being the effective older sibling / pretty close. so i was just half wondering like, well what if mordecai killed someone too rather than being in shit over embezzling. maybe! and how this ties in is that i'm also considering, like, maybe any of this has to do with that Past that mordecai has. the arbogasts were saying atlas Settled Some Of mordecai's pursuing grievances....maybe Lackadaisy Embezzling could be about settling even more via financial payoffs. or something. just a potential troublesome loose thread

there's also the Mystery of "what's marigold bothered about. is what's changed there being this lawful prohibition agent you can't pay off and could somehow shut marigold down longer than ten minutes. and who's in charge of marigold" which is relevant b/c the mystery to me is that, where we leave off in the comic, mordecai is Very Motivated by "how does it figure in re: atlas's death" still and at this risktaking crossroads about it wherein he's clearly positioned at odds with marigold. what are the important things called into question. if marigold knew how atlas died, what would they even do about it. is the problem "well mordecai how do i know you won't also shoot Me, the mystery owner of marigold," seems like something he could expect to be more directly confronted about rather than [what, if marigold knows more about atlas's death and is Just displeased with mordecai about it, they're gonna either Not say anything about it or just try to get rid of mordecai by giving him this hands-on work where he Might be killed?] like, just kill him, And the fact we know the prohibition agent drago Was planning to meet with gracie grombach (and his lawyer, presumably the guy mordecai hatcheted to death just the other night at the start of things) for real, so there's actual reasons to assign him these killings....seems like it's more about things Missing to us as readers about Why they felt they had to begrudgingly kill atlas, what their further mystery connection is / what that impetus was....

oh and back to that [very tangential] tangent re: how i wouldn't have figured mordecai and mitzi interacted much But Maybe They Did, i also before now was assuming that, at least b/c mordecai's business was either in the most dangerous &/or most mathematical work at lackadaisy, he wouldn't have interacted much with ivy, who would've been all of around ten or so when he started there. the pilot specifically illustrates the results of his history with lackadaisy by having him entirely refrain from taking the shot when aiming at her, which i'm also sort of [bonus material]esquely interpreting as "not comic canon noncompliant," but at first i was like, well, like how viktor is protective of ivy / playing concerned patriarch as she puts it, and we know he has a daughter maybe around her age, we also know (from bonus material) that mordecai has younger sisters, including one feasibly also around ivy's age. or just that if you've known someone since they were like 9 or something, you're still reluctant to shoot them. but now i'm Noting that a) most everyone else who's been around awhile, mitzi, viktor, even rocky, has commented on mordecai, but ivy hasn't, which may be a bit Mysterious, and b) in her nightmare sequence moment, she sure not only has this Concept of him, but interacts with him in the dream

which might not mean anything really, but sure might imply she'd talked to him readily enough before, and does also serve as a bolstering / reminder of the idea they'd have interacted, especially since there's the entire factor of "if she was interacting with viktor, this would probably involve all the more mordecai adjacency" like well, interesting, noted, etc

oh and it has to also be mentioned how i'm supposing that also what the savoys are saying about mordecai and atlas, via indirectly framing it by discussing how maître carrefour Already Knows mordecai, can be taken as accurate / is not going to be contradicted. so there's how mordecai seems to resent being called the kind that turns on his partners on a dime (while the savoys Probably had a more uncomplicated departure from their earlier associations. though maybe if marigold knows mordecai was involved in atlas's death, he's Also been hired rather than having been shot, in a stroke of generosity)....and then there's the very broadly relevant description of how, once you take that one path laid out for you, you're Obliged To Him Only, Always, the other paths gone forever....the way pretty much everyone involved was in a place with especial vulnerabilities and limited options at the start, and taking one available path left them kind of trapped there / unwilling to get off of it b/c otherwise they're lost again. what might have motivated a couple of people to snuff out their would-be guiding light, when it's not as though they now act as though they'd clearly found some better one....there's also the fact that serafine characterizes their diable as having a hot temper, wonder if that application could be overlapped with atlas too....and it just handily circles around for rooting for this dream team w/mordecai & the savoys; whether the latter anticipate Not sticking around with marigold forever; the fact that it would be quite a surprise if they do assume that for the first time mordecai is, in fact, just having fun tonight; that mordecai sure may be lost in the dark in-between crossroads rn. rooting for them to stay friends no matter what one way or another. mordecai's as much of a wild card as anyone at this juncture really, keep being wild cards together

meanwhile mordecai not knowing what's going on but laying out some of the confusion is helpful but like, well then we definitely are confused too

i'll say too....really i have to imagine that there Is some bigger missing piece in the [Why] of mitzi & mordecai's murder secret that one could only guess at at best, but i think of this as an effort to kind of feel out the shape of What's Missing thusly, figuratively. and this has been an extensive "i dunno" without any epiphanies falling into place along the way but hey lol, laying it out....if marigold already knows about the How atlas died, namely, if mordecai specifically carried it out, you'd think that if nothing's come of that already, he's fine. or maybe he just wants to Know anyways, though it seems as or more risky to Not kill a guy he's supposed to as marigold's professional killer....he says he's not sure if he knows important Things he thought he knew, plural, unsurprising if there's more than one such important thing we definitely don't know, but suspecting that his concerns might have to do with the big mystery Why they killed atlas, which might also align with how mordecai's reacting to asa saying he warned atlas of [something/s] before his death, which sure doesn't otherwise necessarily imply he knows anything about the death itself. and then mitzi, who should also be in the know, is still asking "how does it figure in" re: connecting his death & if asa Did warn atlas of something....i sure don't know either, and you two have so much more info lol

and Does rushing water count as a clue? cue me trying to zoom in on an illustration to see if the silhouette of a figure reflected in mordecai's glasses could be atlas (don't think it was, or that it'd be a Key Clue dropped thusly anyways) like hell i dunno yeah maybe the rivers are relevant somehow in secret ways, that'd fit, but again only guesses. oh and hey, why would mitzi and mordecai have any kind of gun handoff? maybe as like, a burner revolver lol. i always end up going Shruggg at mysteries but i am enriched by rotating them anyways, especially when it's so tied to character here, and when they're not the only thing relevant to ongoing story so it's just intriguing rather than simply frustrating / stifling to not have already solved them / not the only point of interest. e.g. who Knows why mordecai's having his off the shits saturday but it's so fun that he is. good for him (ultimately) (probably) (hopefully)

[lilyvessticle]

When (most) songs appear in Camp Here & There

**SPOILERS FOR CHNT**

Ok so I'm a little normal about CHNT. Just finished it recently, and I really loved the musical motifs. Big Will Wood fan. The full songs that came from the podcast are some of my fav Will Wood songs, so it was unbelievably cool to slowly realize they are actually about CHNT as it went on. I was confused on one thing though.

What's the deal with Yes, to err is human, so don't be one? I know that it's supposed to be about Adam, with the Vampirism/Cannibalism and all that. But I checked all points he's mentioned, Files 11, 16, and 28, and Yes to err is human doesn't play during any of them. Looking back, the slightly whimsical tune of the song wouldn't really match the vibe of someone horrifically eating their own. But here's the thing. It appears so much throughout the series. I could only recall a few instances of it appearing by memory, so I tried to look up some kind of list of when each song appears in the podcast, as background music or stand alone. I got nothing. I had some time and said fuck it, I'll do it myself.

To preface, I didn't include any instances of When Somebody Needs You or Your Body, My Temple, because I think the meaning and reason for inclusion are easy enough to pick up on: the relationship between Sydney and Jedidiah, and The Elephant Man (who I refer to as e man cause I'm lazy) respectfully. I did however include one instance of Your Body, which I'll go over later. I also didn't include any of the other background songs that didn't have a connection with the main album Will Wood posted for this podcast. I also occasionally added descriptors of the motif itself if I felt that it was noteworthy. If it simply says end, it played during after the episode during the end segment.

First off, the reason why I did this in the first place. Looking at all instances of Yes to Err, I'm starting to realize that it doesn't have a meaning. Or at least a specific one character, like with the other two songs. Yes to Err appears a whole 11 times, and no specific character/idea is really a throughline through any of them. One idea I have is that it might be a theme for dramatic irony. An innocent event/theme that will either end in disaster or turn rotten. In file 1, Sydney questions the e man's existence, which of course takes a spin throughout the whole series. In file 8, it appears when Sydney is playing the 3 questions game with Jedidiah's package. To me it seemed like innocent bickering between close friends at first, but then suddenly turned more heated. Weirdly enough, it played during both times Yvonne covered for Sydney's announcements. I don't really know how this connects to dramatic irony, maybe something to do with Sydney's weird handwriting? But like this, many other appearances feel loose at best when thought of from this angle.

Next up is the main theme, remixed to be played in the background. Like Yes to Err, this one doesn't seem like there is much connection between instances. While listening for the first time, I thought that the main theme was a motif for the whole camp or Lucille. This was mainly because of the instance with staff bonding, and Lucille was mentioned a handful of times while this played. But looking back, there are also plenty of instances where the current event isn't connected to the camp specifically or Lucille, like in file 28 where they are practicing astral projecting.

The final big one that I recorded was Rhumba of Death, which doesn't actually have lyrics but is still included in the main album, so I decided to include it as well. Like the others, no clear connector.

Which leads me to my depressing final point: there probably is no specific reason M&B put any of these background songs where they were. Most likely it was to fit the vibe of whatever situation was currently playing out. When researching, I also saw somewhere that M&B commissioned 2 full songs, but Will provided 4. So perhaps Yes to Err and Venetian Blind Man were unexpected, and so they didn't use either of them in accordance to the lyrics. I realized this like half way through doing this, but I decided to post this anyways. If anyone like me is curious about the motifs of CHNT, they can maybe find this post and find solace that someone had already done it and found no reason.

Extra little tidbits:

There is exactly ONE instance of Venetian Blind Man, another one of the songs that has lyrics. The lyrics talk about Rowan and his fear of the sky. It appears in the end segment of file 2, which is about penguins invading the camp and holding it under threat for fish. It has absolutely nothing to do with Rowan, which is a little funny. However the next episode, file 3, starts off with Rowan's introduction and depicts him freaking out about the sky. It does seem like a little bit too much for a coincidence, but at the same time they weren't even in the same episode. Just thought it was neat.

Another interesting bit is that Your Body, My Temple plays in file 9, when Joshua has his rant about Juniper not being an alpha male. This is noticeably missing any creepy men with masks shaped like a certain animal. M&B might have just wanted to use a song with a more sassy energy, but afaik this is the only time the song is used when not describing The Elephant Man. Weird.