#i feel MUCH better than when i first woke up today. like a lot. almost normal even

[tortademaracuya]

I feel so weak

[cravingcoldoreocake123]

Choose to love

• You ignore everyone’s warnings and fall in love with him, but how well will that turn out for you?

• Warnings: Angst, unprotected sex, written porn (literally, find out for yourself ;) ), female reader, fluff, use of y/n, Happy ending. —————————————𝜗𝜚———————————-

“How hard is it for you to stop ignoring me and pretend you don’t love sneaking into my room every night?” You push him by the chest but it doesn’t seem to startle him nor does he stumble back upon the impact, and it frustrates you even more. How could he be so nonchalant and muggy? What does he even get out of pretending you mean nothing to him, you’ll never know. Heat floods your cheeks as you remember the endless amount of times he bumped your shoulder making you trip while also making sure to not spare you even one glance, or when you waved at him and all you received back were nonchalant glares instead of a smile or a wave, and you lower your hand as his dirty group of friends make fun of your pathetic attempt to talk to him.

You woke up earlier every day just to look pretty for him, you put on more makeup than you did before him, washed your hair and dried it, curled it even. Put on your nicest clothes, that you were now running out of and checked yourself in the mirror for what seemed like the millionth time, inspecting your face closely in case he spots a flaw you missed. The thing is, you put in a lot of effort for him, you wanted to look so pretty he wouldn’t even think of looking at another girl. You headed to grab breakfast with Astoria, you filled your plate less and less every day, trying to keep your weight in check while making sure he doesn’t think of you as less classy or less feminine, which didn’t make sense at all. Sure he was in your room every other night telling you how much he loves fucking you full of his cum, but for some reason he couldn’t act right when you’re around others.

“I forgot we even had homework, Snape’s gonna give me an earful today, ugh.” Astoria groans as you two walk arm in arm to the dining hall. “Wait, he gave us homework?! I don’t remember Snape… what?” You stop in your tracks when your sight lands on Matteo’s arm around a little blonde as she buries her head deep in his neck, giggling, making Astoria trip and drop her books. “What on earth are you doing?” She lowers down to grab her belongings, and raises her head to glance at you, but her face drops as soon as she follows your sight, “No. He. Didn’t.”

“I’m sure they’re just friends… right? I mean he- he wouldnt…?” You weren’t sure if you were lying to yourself to feel better, or to Astoria to not look like a complete fool. She had an idea of what was going on between you two and she did warn you of him, but to no avail. “Honey… she’s practically sucking him dry of his blood, “friends” don’t do that.” Your heart quite literally falls down to your ass. You couldn’t tell when you started crying, but multiple tears followed as soon as the first one dropped, sliding and pooling on your chin.

Astoria nudged your arm and pulled you slightly to follow her to your table, but your body refused to move, and your eyes couldn’t dare rip away from the sight in front of you. You were sure you made a fool of yourself, the hairs on your skin stood up as you suddenly became conscious of your surroundings, you could hear every whisper, every laugh and every snicker, and you were certain they were about you, every pair of eyes was glued on you and it made you feel trapped, you didn’t know whether to head to your table and pretend like nothing happened or to run out and not look back, whichever it was, you begged your feet to move and put you out of your misery, but your knees almost gave out as he looked your way, his sweet eyes carefully lingered on your body, and then finally landed on your own.

You felt nauseous as he tilted his head to the side in an attempt to provoke you, and the right corner of his lip lifted, flashing you his white teeth in an innocent little smirk. You felt more anger than pain at that moment, and you didn’t know how or when, but your legs carried you his way. The girl that was previously sat on his lap smelled trouble and wiggled her way out of his arms and went on her merry way before you reached them. You stopped in front of him and Astoria ran behind you pulling you from the scene. “It’s not worth it, he’s not worth it let’s go.” But you wanted to hurt him, you wanted him to feel the stinging you felt when you saw him with her, when he ignored you, when he embarrassed you, and when he creeped his way out of your bed the mornings after like a little skeez. So you smiled at him, and raised your palm as high as you could and landed it on his cheek, as hard as you could.

His face turned the other way around due to the… impact. And his friends snickered and gasped around the table, “Didn’t know you had that in you, y/n.” Draco snickered, “Shut up or it’ll be you next, Malfoy.” Astoria responded, crossing her arms and glaring at him, and god if looks could kill Malfoy would have been six feet deep minutes ago. Your attention turned back to Mattheo as he shifted uncomfortably in his seat, looking at his friends and then you, and you couldn’t quite decipher what emotion his eyes held, you were sure it wasn’t regret considering his actions, but he seemed sorrowful… somehow. “Let’s not do this here, it’s not anyone’s business knowing what’s going on.” He stood up and tried to drag you along with him out of the room. However, you snatched your arm away from his grip and came closer to his face, “But you made it everyone’s business when she was sucking you dry of your blood and grinding down on your dick in front of everyone, remember?”

Mattheo stood up and stared at you for a good couple of seconds, before he bent down a little and picked you up and threw you over his shoulder like you weighed absolutely nothing. You hit and clawed his back and screamed at him to let you down but he walked away from the swarm of students all the way back to his dorm. “Put me down right now Mattheo! I’ll kick your face off.” However, despite your threats he didn’t stop and continued on walking. He finally reached his door, got in and kicked it shut with his foot. You scrunched your nose at the familiar smell of smoke and his cologne lingering in the room, and as he sets you down on his bed you recall the numerous times he put you down like this but under different circumstances, ones where he’d strip you both naked of clothes and make you take him like the good girl you are, you felt your core leaking at the memories but that couldn’t distract you enough from what he had done to you.

You stood up feeling nauseous and lost, you stumbled a bit and he extended his hands to try and steady you, but you backed up as tears started streaming down your face again. “No, no you don’t get to do that. You don’t get to break me then pick me up and try to glue me back together. You don’t get to give me the world and take it away from me that easily, God i- What does she have that I don’t, Mattheo? What did she give you that I didn’t? How could you make me feel like I was the only girl in the world then go and humiliate me like that? I don’t even know why I chose to ignore everyone’s warnings and let you make me so vulnerable like this, why could’t you prove them wrong Mattheo? Why?” You stopped to catch your breath but he took that opportunity to pull you flat to him and kiss you like he craved your lips for years on end. He cradled your face in his hands so delicately and kissed your tears away.

Your hand tangled in his hair, and you kissed him back with the same fiery passion, your tongues both stained of the salt in your tears, but it was short lived as you pushed him off of you and shook your head. “I can’t. I can’t let you in again. You’ve hurt me bad enough that it’ll scar me for a good while, I can’t let myself allow you to do it again.” Your eyes brimmed with tears and you hated yourself for it, you hated how weak and helpless he made you feel. But when you loved, you loved with every fiber in your being, so when shit backfires and goes wrong, you knew damn well it was gonna break you whole. Your knees started to give out at the wrong time, and you tried to hold yourself up but you still felt dizzy, this time he rushed to your side and held you ignoring your pleas for him to get away from you. “I’m here, okay? Please at least just let me take care of you right now, you can barely stand lovie.” Your heart warmed at the nickname, and you turned your face to stare at his with tired eyes, cursing at yourself for letting him get so close to you.

He picked you up again in his arms and set you down on his bed, he then rushed to get a cup of water and held it up to your lips as you looked up at him with bambi eyes. “There you go, good girl.” The cold water felt so soothing on your burning throat, and you closed you eyes savoring the feeling for a sweet while. He sets the cup down when you whine as a sign for him to stop, and he soon gets on the bed next to you. He sets his arm on your waist and pulls you close to his chest, and you let him. You laid your head on him and your muscles relaxed hearing his heartbeat. Your heart still felt heavy, and the scene of him smirking directly at you while she was on top of him still plagued your mind. He felt you tense up, and he raised his hands to your tear stained cheeks, and kissed your puffy eyes. “I always fucked up the things I love. I never felt important or secure, so now commitment scares me, it scares the shit out of me, I’m so scared i’ll get deserted by those I love so I just… leave before I get left, in attempt to save me and my feelings but I never thought of how it would make others feel. I realized you meant more to me than just a hookup, god my hands shook when I laid my eyes on you and my head hurt trying to comprehend how someone so fucking perfect could have interest in me. You scared me, I had never seen someone so delicate and angelic, you-” He stopped to stare at you, and suddenly his tears turned glassy with tears. Your eyebrows raised and your lips parted in shock to see him letting out such emotions. He sniffed and caressed your face, “I dreamed of you almost every night, and i thought about during the day, you never escaped my mind and it horrified me how someone else had such control over me, and me being the dumb fuck I am, I tried to suppress my feelings for you, and I tried to ignore you and hurt you so that you’d forget me, but it destroyed me inside. I was so scared of loving you, but I am terrified to not be able to do so now. Merlin, please forgive me, please forgive me. I had no idea what I was doing.” You looked up at him to find his face all red of shame, and his eyes wet with tears. You reached down to find him digging his nails so deep into his skin that blood started seeping out. He relaxed at your touch and let you interlock your fingers with his.

You leaned and kissed him, and he had never felt alive until then. You threw your arms around him and he deepened the kiss even more as he trapped you in his arms and switched your positions so that he was on top, and you were stuck under him. He pulled away to say something but you couldn’t let him away from you, and you latched your lips on his again. He whined as you bit his lip and you took that chance to slip your tongue in his mouth. His hands immediately grabbed your back and flipped you on your stomach, you yelped in surprise and he grinded down on your ass. “I’ve never seen such a pretty thing, you are everything I have dreamed of. I’m so sorry, let me make it up to you, lovie.”

You moaned as he kept grinding on you, you had missed feeling all of him against you. He latched his lips on your neck marking it and you threw your hand back to tug at his hair, but he grabbed both of your hands and held them behind you. “I missed my girl so much, no one could ever compare to you.” His other hand had flown to your exposed thighs, gripping them as he sucked at your sweet spot, and when you moaned his name, he felt like he was going to lose it. He wandered higher and under you skirt, pushed your soaked panties aside and slipped a finger in you, pumping it slowly in and out of you. He twitched and leaked at every sweet little sound you made, he had missed you more than life, and everything he had screwed up- everything he tried to fix- he was certain you were his reward.

He pulled his finger out of you and put it to your lips to let you taste yourself, and he moaned at the sight, his dick ached to be inside of you. “God you are so fucking pretty.” You smiled shyly at the compliment, but you felt empty due to the lack of contact so you rutted along his cock, and he cursed at the feeling. He felt how soaked you were though the thick material of his jeans, and he smiled at how warm your cunt was for him. He flips you again to face him, and the smile still lingered on his lips at your beauty. He hurriedly takes your clothes off, leaving you in your underwear only, and he kisses you from your forehead all the way down to your clothed pussy. He strips you of your panties as well and the sight of it alone made him feel like he was gonna cum right there and then. He raises his face to kiss you gently before freeing himself of his clothes.

Your eyes wander down to his cock as he pumped himself a few times, and your cheeks redden at his length, he was big. Sure you had seen him and he has been inside you before but you never got used to his size. “You okay sweet girl?” You nod at him feeling a loss for words. “If you want me to stop just tap my shoulder, got it baby?” The effect this man had on you was ungodly, you couldn’t dare tear your eyes away from him, if god had favorites he was certainly at the top of the list. “Use your words honey.” He snaps you back to reality and you suddenly feel shy under his gaze. “I got it, I’m good.” “Good girl.” He says before he lines himself with your entrance and your hands fly to grip his broad shoulders, and he shoves himself inside of you slowly to not overwhelm you. The moment your velvet walls grips his cock, his shackles crumble and he sighs shakily at the feeling. You feel him lay his weight on you as he gripped your neck and hip to fuck you as deep as he could.

He started off slow and gentle so you’d get used to him, and as soon as he felt your body relax against him he picked up the pace, his hand wrapped around your neck keeps you grounded, and he squeezes it enough to make your eyes roll back from the amount of pleasure you’re feeling. His other hand slid to your tits, gripping them and rolling your nipples between his slender fingers, “My hands are yours.”

his cock fucked into your poor cunt even harder and somehow deeper, forcing you to grip the sheets at the feeling. “My cock’s yours.”

He kept fucking you as he angled his head down to reach your lips and he planted a sweet kiss on them. “My lips are yours.”

He grabbed your hand and put it to his chest, right above his fast beating heart, he made sure to let your hand there long enough you could feel it beating out of his chest. “And my heart’s sure as hell yours too, lovie.” Your own heart fluttered at his words, and you felt overwhelmed at how good he was making you feel. His hand still held your own tightly and you scratched his chest, arching your back as you cried out his name. “Fuck Mattheo. I’m.. close.” You could barely form words, and you dared to open your eyes and look at him, only to find him already admiring you, you couldn’t handle it and your cunt squeezed him tight. He groaned and choked your neck, nothing feels better than him buried balls deep inside you, fucking you full of his load.

Stars dotted your vision, and you used every ounce of energy you had left in you to wrap your legs around him, pulling him even closer, and he took that as a challenge to fuck you even better at that angle, and you felt your orgasm rocking through your body. “Are you close, princess? I can feel you squeezing me, honey.” He giggles a little and kisses the tip of your nose. “You’re gonna be the death of me. You’re taking me so well, love. You’re doing so good f’me.” His sweet words throw you over the edge and you moan as you release yourself on his dick, and he reaches his hand down between your bodies to rub your clit and overstimulate you. He buries his head in your neck as he feels himself getting closer, and you bite his shoulder as he abused it.

“I’m- I’m cumming- fuck-” his movements slow as he reaches his high, and you feel him fall limp on top of you after he pumps his cock in and out of you a few more times. He stays like that for a little while, and you raise your hands to play with his soft curls. He throws his arms around you and savors the moment, kissing your neck every now and then. “Thank you, for letting me in. I’m not gonna let anything or anyone hurt you, I love you.. I’m in love with you. I love you so much.” He looks up at you with his sweet eyes searching yours for a reply, and you flash him your sugary smile and his heart melts all over again. “I’ve loved you for a long time and I’m not planning on stopping.” You say, and he lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, and leans to your lips to kiss you so delicately, smiling between kisses.

“Do you want to go eat, lovie?”

“I can’t really move, Mattheo.” You say shyly, and he smirks at you as he gets up from the bed. And he cleans you and himself before helping you put your clothes back on, “I’ll carry you.” He shrugs, putting his shirt on. “Are you crazy? Everyone will know we fucked then.” You shook your head at him, straightening your skirt. “As if everyone doesn’t already know. You were screaming my name, darling, they know.”

[reccyls]

Your Hand, My Lady - The Mature Butler Pledges Loyalty (Victor story)

My translation of Victor's butler event story

--

As a result of the Evil King's Game, my exclusive butler for the day is...

Victor: Oh dear, how could this be! Turns out there isn't a number 6 after all, so the order gets turned back onto the king!

...the person who started this round of the game in the first place, Victor.

Victor: But one must put their heart and soul into what they have agreed to do, so do allow me to be your butler.

Kate: S-sure. I'm looking forward to it.

(Victor as my butler... I wonder what that's going to be like?)

...

Kate: Mm....

Daylight streaming into my room pulled me from my sleep. As I sat up, I noticed Victor drawing open the curtains.

Victor: Ah... Apologies, Lady Kate. Did I wake you?

Kate: It's fine...

(Oh, right. Victor's going to be acting as my butler for the entire day today.)

Victor: Heh. Are you still sleepy?

He spoke quietly, almost in a whisper, mindful of how I was only barely awake. His voice was sweeter and gentler than usual.

Victor: You have no duties to attend to today, so if you wanted to sleep in, that would be no trouble. It is still half past 5 in the morning.

Kate: Half past five...? Then, I'll sleep a little more.

Victor: Of course. Sleep well, and I will let you know when breakfast is prepared.

As I curled up in bed once more, Victor silently approached and adjusted my blanket. With a warm, ticklish feeling in my chest at Victor's care, I enjoyed my extra bit of sleep that morning.

...

After I had my fill of sleep, Victor woke me and I got dressed for the day. I also enjoyed a delicious breakfast.

Kate: Today's breakfast was really good!

Victor: That is good to hear. I'll be sure to pass your words on to the chef. Victor: ...My lady, how about some fresh fruits for dessert? Say 'aah'.

As Victor spoke, he held a fork with a piece of apple up to me.

(Is he really going to feed me...?) (Is this a normal thing for butlers to do?)

Hesitantly, I ate the offered fruit.

Kate: Mm, this is good too! Kate: ...But, um, it is a bit embarrassing to do this.

The gap between me and Victor felt smaller than normal today. It wasn't just regular kindness I could feel in the depths of his words and his expressions. He gave off the impression that he truly and deeply cherished me.

Victor: Please do forgive me. Victor: I was enjoying myself too much and I have ended up making you uncomfortable. Victor: Could you find it in your heart to forgive such an incompetent butler...?

Kate: You don't have to apologize! You're not incompetent at all! Kate: Please just keep doing what you think you should. If I'm actually uncomfortable with something, I'll let you know.

Victor: Thank you very much. My lady is truly kind.

...

(I basically spent the entire day with Victor. It was a lot of fun.)

...The truth is, this past week, I'd seen some pretty horrible things during my missions with Crown. I wanted to go on those missions so I could get used to that kind of tragedy, but all I ended up doing was make myself more and more depressed...

(...And that's when Victor proposed the Evil King's Game, and he ended up as my butler for the day.) (Thanks to being able to spend time with him, I feel a lot better.)

But just like nothing sad lasts forever, neither do the good times. Every hour that passed was one hour less that I would be able to spend with Victor.

Victor: Ah yes. Before dinner, may I braid your hair, my lady? Victor: During breakfast and lunch, your hair seemed to bother you.

Kate: Oh, thank you. If you don't mind?

Victor: Of course not, leave it to me. I'll be sure to style your hair to be both practical and beautiful.

Victor sat me down in front of the mirror. Parting my hair with a comb, his large hands began to braid my hair.

Kate: ...You really know a lot about women's fashion, Victor.

Throughout the day, Victor was careful to ensure that my clothes wouldn't end up dirty, and helped to suggest complementary accessories when I was unsure which ones to pick. And the hands working through my hair were obviously very familiar with the act of braiding.

Victor: I am your butler, but I do usually work as the queen's aide.

Kate: Oh, right...

Since he worked closely with the queen, it made sense that Victor would have picked up a deep understanding of women's fashion. I was embarrassed that such a simple thought never even crossed my mind. And not only that, but I became aware of a muddled feeling not unlike fog spreading through my chest.

(I had thought that I was the only one who would be able to see Victor as a butler.) (I just didn't consider that I wasn't the only person to know this side of Victor.)

Victor has a lot of friends and acquaintances beyond just Crown, and I've never seen the face he wears in front of them. For some reason, today, that obvious fact was like a dagger to my heart.

(Is there a side of Victor that only I know...?) (...Ah. That's right.)

Kate: Victor, can I ask you for something?

Victor: Of course, my lady. Whatever you need, I am at your disposal.

Kate: This isn't something that happens every day, so I wanted to see you wearing a butler's uniform.

Victor: A butler's uniform?

Kate: Yeah... Have you ever worn one before?

Victor: No, never... And if this is what my one and only lady wishes of me, then I do not mind wearing one.

Kate: I'd love to see it!

And so, Victor went to go put on a butler's outfit.

(Maybe that was kind of heavy-handed of me, but I'm really excited.)

As I stood in the hallway waiting for Victor to be done changing, William approached.

William: Kate, have you seen Victor around?

Kate: He's in his room right now. Changing his clothes, to a butler's uniform.

William: A butler's uniform...? Ah right, he is our little robin's butler for the day, isn't he. William: Sorry for this, but may I borrow your butler?

Kate: Huh...?

William: Her Majesty has summoned Victor for an emergency.

(Victor is my butler for the day... but the queen's orders take priority.)

Kate: Okay. It's Her Majesty's orders, after all.

William: ...You seem displeased.

I flushed, embarrassed at being seen through by William, who had let out a chuckle.

(Feeling lonely because Her Majesty has stolen Victor from me... I'm acting like such a spoiled brat.)

Just then, I spotted Victor, who had now finished changing, approaching. But I knew that if I looked him in the eye, I would end up asking him not to leave, so I made sure to look away from him. As I held back, William had walked over to meet Victor halfway, and the two of them began to speak. It was most likely about the queen's summons.

(Victor is going to leave.) (But... if I could leave a little of myself in his heart...)

Kate: ...Victor. Do you have a little time?

Propelled by a sense of possessiveness I didn't even realize I had, I called out to Victor.

Victor: ...William, can you go on ahead?

Seeing something in my expression or body language, Victor sent William off first.

Kate: Just a second, Victor.

I took one of my ribbons, and tied it around a lock of his hair.

Kate: ...Today, you're not just the queen's aide, but also my butler. Kate: Even if you're far away... please remember that. Kate: ...This is my order, as your lady.

As I told him my wish for him to keep me in his heart...

Victor took my hand and pressed a gentle kiss to it.

Kate: ...

Victor: ...Of course. Today, I am your loyal butler. Victor: And so would you tell me the reason for the fog that clouds your thoughts?

Kate: I... I-

I didn't know whether to reveal the truth of what I wanted, but every second I dawdled was another second spent obstructing the queen's orders. Gathering my resolve, I opened my mouth to speak.

Kate: ...I'm jealous of the queen, of how much time she has with you. Kate: If I could... I want to order you to stay here.

(Every moment I spend with Victor is precious.) (I wish we could be together forever... I've ended up thinking that way.)

But the reality of the situation is, I'm in no position to make that demand. The queen's orders are absolute. And so because I cannot always be by his side in reality, I wanted to make a place for myself in his heart.

Victor: ......

I turned away from my thoughts, back towards Victor, who had fallen silent.

Kate: I'm sorry. I don't want to burden you, so just--

Hurriedly, I tried to pull my hand back, but Victor raised it to his lips once more.

Kate: ....!?

(Th-that... that wasn't just a kiss, was that his tongue!?)

Seeing my flustered expression, Victor cracked a teasing smile.

Victor: Just because I am your butler does not mean that you can let your guard down, my lady. Victor: The more you say such sweet things, the more I wish to mark your body with my kisses...

Victor's words were full of uncharacteristic seductiveness, and my heart began to pound loudly.

Victor: Do you remember what I told you earlier, when you had dressed up as a maid? Victor: I said to make sure you only give your heart and your body to a partner you are happy to choose.

Kate: ...I remember.

Victor: And so... may I think of myself as that partner, my lady?

Kate: You...

If I gave the wrong answer or if I evaded, I got the feeling that Victor would slip far away from me. Determined to tell him the full, complete truth, I opened my mouth.

Kate: .....Yes. You may.

Victor: I see.

Victor let go of my hand.

(Oh....)

Victor: I'm sorry, I must go now. Until next time.

With that, he quickly walked away.

(I... That was way too forward, wasn't it...!) (When he comes back, I need to apologize for making things weird...)

But Victor did not return before the end of the day.

...

(I wanted to wait for Victor, but at this rate I'll end up staying up the whole night... I should go to sleep now.)

With that thought, I extinguished the lamp and got into bed. Remembering all of Victor's smiles from the past day, I began to slip into slumber. And just then-- My bedroom door quietly swung open, and a scent that brought to mind a quiet deep night approached. When I opened my eyes, there was a figure kneeling over me in bed.

Kate: Who's there...?

Victor: ...It's me. Victor.

Kate: Oh, you're back from the palace...? It's late... you worked hard today...

I was on the cusp of nodding off, barely able to keep my eyes open as I welcomed Victor back.

Kate: And... why are you in my room?

Victor: ...Don't you know?

Kate: Is it about work...?

Victor: Hmm... Something a bit more personal than work.

Kate: Personal? Is there some kind of night banquet that you want to invite me to?

Victor: That sounds lovely, but no. The truth is...

Victor brought his lips to my ear.

Victor: ...I've come to steal your heart.

(Steal my heart?)

Kate: Hehe... There's no point.

Victor: Why not?

Kate: Because you already stole it a long time ago...

I haven't been able to stop thinking about Victor after he left for the palace. If that didn't mean that he had already stolen my heart, then what did?

Kate: Why do you want my heart anyway, Victor?

Victor: Why, you ask? Victor: Because it's so beautiful, I couldn't help but want it.

(I'm pretty sure his eyes are more beautiful than my heart...)

His face was hovering above mine. In the darkness of the room, his eyes seemed to glimmer with light. As I kept staring, those gorgeous eyes drew closer and closer... His long, beautiful hair fell across my face.

Victor: ...

I felt the touch of something delicate across my neck, my shoulders. When I realized that it was Victor's lips pressing across my skin, I felt no desire to push him away.

Kate: Haha, that tickles...

It made me think of all the times that Roger's corgi, Ale, would play with me. I giggled.

Victor: That's all? It just tickles?

(Huh...? Victor's voice sounds a little unhappy about something?)

As I was wondering what it could be about, Victor's lips moved from my shoulder to my ear.

Kate: ...Ah...

The heat of his tongue traced the shell of my ear. I trembled at the unfamiliar sensation.

Victor: Kate.

He whispered my name into my ear like he was trying to express a secret love that should never be.

(He's looking only at me...) (I don't know why, but that makes me really, really happy......)

With that strange joy held in my heart, my eyes slid shut, and I finally drifted off.

...

William: ...I saw you paying a visit to Kate's room last night.

After finishing a discussion about work, William wasted no time in starting to gossip.

Victor: Are you accusing me of something?

William: Heh. Does it look that way?

Victor: No. You look like you're just having a laugh.

William: Not quite. I'm not poking fun, I am quite happy. William: After all, were you not doing what your heart wanted?

Victor: I'm sorry to disappoint you, but no. Victor: I only went to her room to warn her not to give her heart away so freely. And...

William: And?

Victor: Kate doesn't remember it at all. If she does, she probably thinks it was just a dream.

William: What a shame.

At William's words, a vague smile drifted to Victor's lips.

William: So why did you rig that game in the first place? William: Surely you must have known there was no number 6 stick in the first place.

Victor: Nothing gets past you, Will. Victor: Lately, Kate wasn't coping well with the missions she had joined. I just wanted to be able to do something for her.

William: That's it? No other reason?

Victor: ....No. Victor: Even if I did have feelings for her... there is nothing I can offer her. Victor: Because "Victor" belongs to "Victoria".

----

Notes: In the last exchange with William, Victor uses 俺 (ore) instead of 僕 (boku) as he normally does. Also, his last sentence is written as "Because I belong to Her Majesty", but what he says out loud is what I have written down.

[taexual]

sleepwalking ● 9 | jjk

pairing: jungkook x fem!reader

summary: due to unfortunate circumstances, you ended up managing your ex-boyfriend’s band. you thought you’ve both made peace with it, but suddenly he’s very eager to prove to you that first love never dies.

genre: rockstar!jungkook / exes to lovers

warnings: explicit language, mutual pining, angst, SLOOOWW BUURNNN

words: 9.9k

read from the beginning ○ masterlist

chapter 9 ► the silence is one thing that i’ll remember you said. well, it’s better than nothing when nothing’s all that you left

The next morning was warm.

It was such a stark contrast to last night that you couldn’t help but still feel phantom shivers on your skin when you got off the bus to stretch your legs. It was still two more hours to Oslo, and it was unreasonably early to be awake, considering you did not return to the bus until sunrise—a mere half an hour before the scheduled departure for Norway.

Everyone else was still asleep, which made sense: they must have returned to the bus sometime very late, too. Granted, when you and Jungkook reached the restaurant on Strandvägen yesterday, your team was no longer there—but that didn’t mean they went to sleep as soon as they returned.

To be fair, you hadn’t expected to find them at the restaurant anyway. But after the abrupt end of your conversation with Jungkook on the bridge, you had hoped for a distraction. Something to take your mind off the uncomfortable gaping hole inside you.

Jungkook had suggested last night that you take a taxi back to the tour bus, and you were almost ready to walk back on your own.

It confused you—this unexpected longing for something you dared not name—but it also frightened you. Therefore, you were glad that when the bus reached Oslo, Jungkook was still asleep.

You felt like you needed a minute—to convince yourself that whatever you thought you’d felt in the air last night was more wishful thinking than anything else. Because here’s the thing about wishful thinking: it was yours. And everything that was yours, you could extinguish. You could put it out like you’d done countless times before.

So, several hours later in Oslo, you gave Yoongi very strict instructions to keep the band close and make sure they rested before tomorrow’s performance. And then you took your girls to explore the city, sightsee and drink as much coffee as you could find.

Unfortunately for Jungkook, sightseeing was something he also wanted to do with you once you arrived in Oslo. He had a lot to tell you; he knew he owed you an explanation. He just wasn’t sure how to explain what had happened, let alone what hadn’t happened.

But when he woke up on the bus, you had already left, taking Maggie and Luna with you. So, not only did he have to wallow in his thoughts, but he also had to deal with a sulking Taehyung, who never openly admitted why he was sulking, but it was obvious enough. Even though he texted Luna all day, she wasn’t physically there with him, and that wasn’t enough.

Jungkook was annoyed. He should have seen this coming—he tended to sleep in while you tended to not—but he realised he had expected you to stay. He’d expected a reaction. Perhaps he’d hoped you would demand that he explained himself and why the two of you had gone from I-miss-you to let’s-walk-and-not-look-at-each-other.

Your reaction, however, was no reaction at all.

You and the girls went out, which for the three of you, meant getting ice cream and walking the city streets until you found something interesting. Sometimes this took up the whole day. You loved it—especially today.

But then, just as you were approaching what looked like a castle with crowds of tourists flocking to it—Luna discovered it was the Royal Palace, which should have been obvious, but you and Maggie still ooh-ed and ahh-ed at Luna’s Google Maps skills—your phone started to ring.

Licking your ice cream hurriedly so it wouldn’t melt completely while you talked, you walked away from the girls to take the call.

You were half-expecting an emergency, but before you could really be disappointed that you had to end your excursion, you noticed the unknown number on the screen of your phone. You briefly considered not answering, but you saw that the number had an area code from home.

You thought it might be your brother calling. Once again, you considered not answering, still angry at him for his recklessness and your mum’s tears. But responsibility won over, and you picked up.

On the other end of the line was a man asking for you. For a moment, you were confused, because the voice sounded familiar, but the owner of it didn’t seem to know who he was talking to.

“This is she,” you responded to your own name. “May I ask who’s calling?”

“Oh, you sound so different for some reaso—it’s Nick,” the man said, and you stopped chewing on the waffle cone of your ice cream in surprise.

Nick Zhou had been your supervisor after you graduated and started to work at the company where you now managed Rated Riot. Back then, you were just an intern before being promoted to assistant manager for an indie rock band with the ominous name The Jungle Will Get You, when you were only 23 years old. Nick was their manager then, and he never admitted it, but you knew he’d pulled some strings to get you that job.

A little over a year later, you took over the management of Rated Riot, and you haven’t spoken to Nick since. He went on to manage Reconnaissance, one of the biggest alternative rock bands in the country, if not the world. Just being their manager made Nick more popular than Rated Riot at the moment.

You thought things had worked out well for you both, so there was simply no reason for you to stay in touch.

You figured the reason he was calling you now had to mean good things for Rated Riot. Supporting Reconnaissance on tour? Perhaps a collaboration?

“Nick!” was the first word out of your mouth after the surprise had subsided. “So nice to hear from you again.”

“I heard you were in Europe? That’s huge!” he said, which was kind of him, because Reconnaissance were selling out stadiums.

“We are, yeah. Oslo right now,” you said, smiling at Maggie, who approached you and tugged on your arm like a toddler wanting to go on a ride at an amusement park. Except in this case, the ‘ride’ was a wine bar down the street from the palace. You nodded, and that was permission enough for her to jog over to Luna and drag the two of you towards the bar, never mind that it was 3 PM. You said into the phone, “how are you? You’re going to Australia soon, right?”

“Next week, yeah,” Nick said. “The new album’s coming shortly after that.”

“Ah, another tour,” you said with a teasing chuckle—you knew how much Nick hated flying. Even the Reconnaissance members talked about their ‘air-sick manager’ in almost every interview they did. “Good luck in advance!”

Nick chortled in irony. “Thanks, I’m going to need it. That’s actually, uh, the reason I’m calling.”

Your heart rate picked up as the ice cream melted in your hand. “Yeah?”

“Yes. See, we had some—er, situations,” he paused here as if searching for a better word. After he didn’t find one, he continued with the one he had picked, “and because of these situations, I’m putting together a new team. With the new album coming out soon, we’re on a really tight schedule.”

“Right,” you said. You could already hear him asking if Rated Riot would like to be the supporting act, and maybe even participate in Reconnaissance’s new album.

“Well, that’s why I’m calling you,” he said. “The management here is just me and this guy, Mark, who can’t dial a phone number to save his life, but he’s a great sport. Keeps the band alive. But I need more people. Preferably someone with, uh, experience.”

He paused meaningfully, but it still took you a minute to realise that he hadn’t contacted you about Rated Riot. He had contacted you about you.

You watched Maggie and Luna enter the wine bar, take your ice cream from you, and make a beeline for the cash register, all while you stood in the doorway.

“I’m—uh—Nick.” There was an uncomfortable lump of surprise in your throat. Your hands felt sticky and your mouth felt dry.  “I’m—I manage Rated Riot.”

“I know,” he said, “and they’re a very promising band, tons of potential,” he paused here, hesitating, “but I thought—well, this is sort of different, isn’t it?”

You would have scoffed if you weren’t so stunned. “Well, of course.”

“Yeah. So, I just—we need an assistant manager. Fast,” Nick said. “And you were the first person I thought of. I mean, we’ve worked together before. I know your strengths and I admire your work ethic. I think you’d be a great addition to our team.”

Overwhelmed, you barely managed to find your words. “I… appreciate the offer. But I don’t think I can just—”

“Think about it, okay?” he interrupted you, aware of the abruptness and sheer mass of this offer. “We’ll be back from Australia next month, so you don’t need to give me an answer right away. Just—the sooner the better, of course. But you can think about it. I just wanted to let you know that I have an opening, and I’d love it if you joined us.”

“I—okay.” The faint smell of grapes and old wood around the wine bar seemed to grow stronger the longer that you stood here, still frozen. “Thank you, Nick.”

“I’ll be waiting to hear from you,” he said. “Take care, yeah?”

You nodded, even though he couldn’t see you. “Yeah, you too. Thanks again.”

The three beeps after he ended the call reverberated in your head, and it was another half-minute before you moved the phone from your ear. You looked at it in disbelief, as if it had been someone else who’d just had this conversation, and you had merely overheard it.

In an attempt to ground yourself, you tried to simplify your loud thoughts into whispers of an adequate noise.

There was an opening to be Reconnaissance’s assistant manager.

You’d have to take a step back, do more mundane tasks, similar to the ones you did back when you were Nick’s assistant that first time. But if you said yes, you’d be working with one of the biggest bands in the world right now.

But you couldn’t leave Rated Riot. You were their manager. You believed in them, and you loved everyone on this team.

“You look like you just found out Santa isn’t real,” Maggie’s voice brought you back to the present. She had come to get you, so you’d stop blocking the entrance for others. “Who was that?”

You still felt very hot and half-choked, so you tried to loosen the collar of your white tank top. The denim jacket you wore over it didn’t help much with the heat inside of you, either.

“Um,” you looked around as you slipped out of your jacket. “Can we get some wine first?”

Maggie raised her eyebrows. “Oh, it’s like that, is it?”

You nodded, and before you could give a verbal response, Maggie was already calling out to your friend, who was about to place her order, “Luna! Grab some doubles! We have something going on.”

It took the girls about two minutes to find a table—granted, a couple of tourists who saw Maggie dragging you through the wine bar while you were trying to regain proper consciousness got scared and left, which helped a lot—and settle down.

As soon as you took the first sip, catching the rich and savoury taste—perhaps a bit too savoury; it immediately made you scrunch your nose—Luna scooted closer to you on the navy-coloured velvet couch.

“What happened?” she asked. “Who was that on the phone?”

You set your glass down. “That was Nick. My former supervisor. Before I started to work with Rated Riot. He, um—he manages Reconnaissance.”

“Oh, shit!” Maggie exclaimed at the same time as Luna muttered, “I don’t really know them.”

“Oh!” Maggie gasped, turning to Luna. “Wait. Weren’t you at their show a few days ago? I saw on your Instagram.”

“Yeah, Taehyung took me. He brought me to the after-party, too, but—” she paused as she noticed that Maggie’s eyes looked ready to pop out. She explained, “oh, that was just to babysit Jungkook. He’s the one who really listens to Reconnaissance. I don’t know any of their songs. They sounded good, but I’m—”

“Oh my God!” Maggie gasped again. She had glitter in her eyes and all over her face. “Wait until we get back on the bus! I probably have five different notebooks full of their song lyrics. You’ll love them.”

Luna nodded her head once, then paused in the middle of the second nod. “Wait, you brought those notebooks on tour? Aren’t they heavy?”

“Kind of. But I like to have them with me. And I keep adding to them, so—” Maggie stopped when you picked up your glass again. Your movement seemed to remind her what the topic was before she digressed. She leaned back in her bright yellow armchair. “—which is not the point. So, what did that guy want? Nick.”

Both girls turned their attention back to you.

You took another sip of your wine and said, “well, I thought he wanted Rated Riot.”

Swirling her glass, Luna asked, “he didn’t?”

“He didn’t,” you confirmed. “Apparently, he wants me.”

Luna was the first to understand the implication as her eyebrows lifted and her chin dropped. Maggie, on the other hand, looked at Luna, and then back at you.

“Like… to work with him?” she asked. “To manage Reconnaissance?”

“Well, obviously not to perform with them on stage,” Luna said to her impatiently, then turned back to you. “Why does he want you?”

“He said he needed to find an assistant manager quickly,” you explained, “and since he knows me, he thought I’d be... suitable. For that job.”

You didn’t know what words to choose so you wouldn’t feel so uncomfortable talking about this. And, as you sat here with your friends and your glass of wine, you realised that a part of you didn’t believe you were even ready to work with someone like Reconnaissance. For the most part, you were terrified of it.

You hoped Rated Riot would reach their level one day, that’s true. But starting to work with a band that was already so outrageously popular felt a bit like being thrown into a pot of boiling water.

“Well, what did you say?” Maggie asked.

“I said no,” you replied, your vision blurring again. “I think.”

The two girls spoke up at the same time.

Luna repeated, “you think?” while Maggie asked, “why not?”

They exchanged a look – Maggie, surprised; Luna, slightly accusing.

“What?” Maggie said in response to her look. “This is big!” She put down her glass and leaned over to touch your knee, wanting to emphasise her point, “I love you, okay? And I love working with you and everyone else here, and I know you do, too. But this is just… huge.”

“I know,” you said, your gaze still wandering along the tiled wall behind Maggie’s armchair. You felt disoriented and the wine had very little to do with it. “But I—I mean, I can’t just leave.”

“I think you should talk to the guys,” Luna suggested. She managed to come to terms with the heaviness of the offer that Nick had made much faster than you did. It helped, of course, that she wasn’t the one who had to make a decision here, but she was making a reasonable point regardless.

“Yeah,” Maggie agreed, pointing at the girl on the couch next to you, and nodding eagerly at you. “Yeah. You should.”

You looked at both of them, then down at your glass, as if you could take a sip and it’d give you very clear directions of what to do next.

“But what can I say to them?” you asked. Then, in a voice meaning to imitate yourself, you said, “‘I might have an opportunity to leave you and work with a much bigger band.’ No. No, I don’t think so.”

Maggie squinted at you, unsure if she was the only one confused again. She asked carefully, “you… don’t think you’ll tell them this? Or you don’t think you’ll work with Reconnaissance?”

You finished your wine and set the glass back on the tray. The other girls’ glasses were still half-full.

“Neither, probably,” you replied. “I’d be—you know. If I went to work with Nick, I’d be fetching coffee for the other staff members and filling out paperwork. I already do that for Rated Riot anyway, but I don’t mind, because I don’t think we’re at a level where I’d need an assistant. But I—I want to reach that level with them. I want to be here every step of the way.”

If you’d lifted your eyes from the table in front of you, you would have seen the soft smile on Luna’s face. Instead, you heard it in her voice when she said, “that makes sense.”

Finally, you looked at her. “It does?”

“Yeah.”

“Uh, I think you should sleep on it,” Maggie said, a different voice of reason. “Make sure this isn’t something you’ll regret later. Oh!” she clapped her hands. “You can even make a pros and cons list!”

You smiled while Luna snickered. She said to you, “pro: obviously, you wouldn’t be managing your ex-boyfriend—”

“Um?” Maggie cut in. “Con: you wouldn’t be managing your ex-boyfriend.”

Luna frowned at her. “How is that a con?”

Maggie raised her eyebrows. “Have you seen her ex-boyfriend?”

Luna’s frown dissipated as she laughed, and even you chuckled, too.

In her whole life, Maggie might have had one and a half doubts about not actually being gay; she was simply an artist to the core. And she was very vocal about how unbelievably easy it was to photograph Jungkook when he was on stage. He was, in a truly annoying way, effortlessly photogenic.

“I guess that’s a pro and a con,” you said. There was a lingering smile on your face—this time, the wine did have something to do with it.

When paired with the sudden anxiety of Nick’s offer, the wine helped you distance yourself from the last conversation you’d had with Jungkook. And maybe it was better, you decided, that your friends didn’t know about the walk you two had taken. You preferred the conversation as it was now — cosy, safe, and almost buoyant.

“Is there a time limit?” Luna asked suddenly. “Did Nick tell you a date?”

“No,” you said with a sigh. “He said he wanted an answer soon. So I don’t have to decide right this second. But I’m not really considering it, to be honest. It’s a great opportunity, sure, but I think working with Rated Riot is a great opportunity, too.”

Both girls nodded in unison, their expressions brightening. Slowly, as you felt the support in their warm gazes, the atmosphere in the wine bar began to lighten, too. They understood. And they agreed with your point.

Luna teased, “does the band pay you extra when you say nice things about them? Because I really love Rated Riot.”

You chuckled. “I wish they did.”

Maggie lifted her glass. “Be careful. If you start complimenting them to their faces, it’ll go straight to their heads. And then we’ll have to give their shows an R rating.”

“Well, that would help them live up to their name,” Luna pointed out and the three of you burst into a fit of giggles again—partially because of the wine, but in your case also because of relief.

Nick’s offer and the confusing feelings from last night did not seem all that troublesome at the moment. You could almost forget about them, focusing only on the way things were right now.

You were happy like this. You didn’t want anything to change.

As dusk fell, Jungkook began to hover his finger over your name in his contact list. Just then, Sid burst into the otherwise empty bus and slammed the door with so much force that the whole vehicle swayed a little.

Startled, Jungkook looked up.

“Dude!” he called out, poking his head out of his bunk to see his friend’s proud face. “Gentle.”

“I have the best plans for us tonight,” Sid said as if he hadn’t heard him. “You will not believe the kind of bars they have here in Norway.”

Although Jungkook doubted that the bars here were any different from the ones back home, he still climbed out of the bunk, more intrigued by the idea of having company than by the supposed uniqueness of Norwegian bars. “Yeah?”

Sid’s smile grew wider still when he saw the same reaction mirrored on Jungkook’s face.

“Yeah,” he confirmed. “Let’s go.”

Jungkook hesitated. He had told you last night that things wouldn’t be the same between him and Sid when they returned home. And he meant it; he would have preferred to spend time with you—right now and back home. But you weren’t here, and while he was waiting for you, everyone else made different plans. Even Taehyung. And Jungkook hated being alone.

Grabbing his jacket, he climbed out of the bunk and allowed Sid to lead him outside, where the rest of their friends were already waiting.

They were like a herd of sheep, Jungkook thought unexpectedly while Sid ushered him out of the bus, the way they followed Sid. Why didn’t they ever protest or suggest their own ideas?

But as he looked at his friends – Jude and Minjun fighting over something on Jude’s phone, shoving the device in each other’s faces and shouting; Sid smacking them both on the backs of their heads, providing his own wisdom to their argument – he knew.

They stayed quiet, because the four of them were always together in the same way: with Sid in the lead, and the others following behind him. That’s the way it has always been. Jungkook knew that if one of them had a genuine problem with this, he would not be taken seriously. Or it would be the last time he could call them friends.

It was either this, or nothing at all.

That night, the four of them ended up in a cocktail bar in Oslo, a significant distance away from the tour bus and the rest of the crew. Jungkook didn’t understand why Sid had chosen this particular place until his friend winked and gestured towards the stairs leading to the basement.

“What’s down there?” Jungkook was dumb enough to ask.

Grateful for the chance to show off, Sid grinned and draped an arm around Jungkook’s shoulders as he led him—along with Jude and Minjun, who were looking around like this was a zoo—to the basement.

“Only the greatest thing to come out of Europe,” Sid explained. “You can thank me later.”

He didn’t.

It was an underground burlesque club with only three dancers, all of whom appeared so intimidating that Jungkook was convinced they could stab the four of them with their nails alone, if any of the boys looked them in the eye for too long. He didn’t dare to try.

Sid loved it.

Jungkook preferred the bar upstairs.

Minjun seemed to agree, so the two went back up for another round, while Jude stayed back. Despite occasionally acting like he hated Sid’s guts, Jude always stayed close to him, almost like an addict, who knew that this drug was bad for him, but still couldn’t break the habit.

“Do you think they’ll make it out alive?” Minjun asked as they waited for their drinks at the bar.

“I don’t think they’re getting out at all,” Jungkook replied. “It’s like siren screams for Sid.”

“That’s true. And if Sid stays, Jude stays.”

Jungkook nodded, his expression grim.

“So, D-11,” Minjun said. It took Jungkook a second to realise that he was counting down the days to the end of the bet. “How’s it going?”

He gave his friend a look. “I’m in a bar with you. How do you think it’s going?”

Minjun smiled and nodded to the bartender to thank him for bringing the drinks. Then he held his glass out to Jungkook.

“A toast,” he declared. Jungkook rolled his eyes and picked up his own glass. “May you win this bet, because Sid on a motorcycle is a menace I want nothing to do with.”

Snorting, Jungkook clinked his glass against his and they both downed their drinks in several big gulps.

“He’s not getting the bike,” Jungkook said, setting his glass down with new-found determination. Hearing Minjun mention the possibility of Sid winning the Katana made it feel more realistic. He had to make sure that didn’t happen.

“Do you need my help?” Minjun asked as if reading his mind.

Jungkook looked up from the bar top. “You couldn’t help even if I asked. We signed an agreement that we wouldn’t tell her.”

“You and Sid signed it,” Minjun pointed out. “I was just the person who typed it all out in my fucking Notes. I’m not legally bound to abide by the conditions of the deal. And, actually, neither are you. It’s just a—”

“Why would you help me?” Jungkook interrupted. His friend’s final sentences had evidently flown over his head. “I’ve hardly got anything to offer you in return.”

Minjun shrugged. “I just don’t want Sid to win.”

Jungkook swallowed. He found himself hoping, suddenly, that there was more to this. That if he really kicked Sid off the tour and out of his life, there would at least be one person who wouldn’t leave with him. One person who would stay.

“I don’t know what you could do,” Jungkook said. “Putting in a good word for me probably wouldn’t do much.”

“No?” his friend said, then looked down at his glass thoughtfully. “Okay. We can go full mentalist on her.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Dropping certain objects in her living space that leave imprints of you in her subconscious,” Minjun said completely seriously. “It’s simple.”

“Dude.” Jungkook blinked. “I don’t know where this—this Sherlockian shit is coming from, but I’m not going to mess with her head.”

Minjun was about to scoff, but held back because the offence on Jungkook’s face at the—apparently, preposterous—suggestion seemed genuine. As if Minjun didn’t know what he was saying. As if this was serious, and Jungkook didn’t want to ruin it by playing games.

Minjun pointed out, “but you already are messing with her head.”

If possible, Jungkook looked even more appalled. “I’m—that’s not what I’m doing.”

“Then what’s the difference between what you’re doing and what I’m suggesting?”

“Well, I’m not trying to—I’m not sneaking around and forcing her to think about me,” Jungkook said, looking away from his friend and meeting the bartender’s gaze. He nodded, and the man behind the bar approached the two friends with a bottle of whiskey.

“It’s not force, technically,” Minjun explained as they watched the bartender refill their drinks. “It’s just how your brain works. You see something that reminds you of someone, and it sticks with you whether you’re aware of it or not.”

“I’d like for that to happen naturally,” Jungkook said, aware that he was the naïve one here. But he liked to think of it as hope. And he had that right—he was the only one who really knew you. The only one who could guess whether you were thinking about him or not.

Minjun shrugged and picked up his glass as soon as it was filled. “It’s your call. I’m just trying to speed up the process.”

Jungkook brought his own drink to his lips, but paused when Minjun spoke up again.

“Let me ask you something, though,” he said. “Before you get too far ahead of yourself.”

Even before he heard the question, Jungkook already felt queasy. “What is it?”

“Do you genuinely want to get back together with her?” Minjun asked.

There seemed to be no ill intentions behind the question, but Jungkook spent a full minute watching him and reading his expression.

Minjun was quick to notice his uncertainty. He reassured, “I’m asking because I care. Not because I want to make fun of you. I know you love her, but this—well, I’m just wondering if you want to act on these feelings.”

Jungkook looked down again. “Yeah, uh, I do. It’s not just about the bet for me.”

Minjun had suspected as much, so he wanted to broach the subject when no one else was around.

“But you still think making a bet out of it is the way to go?” he inquired.

Jungkook knew where this was going. And he still tried to appear nonchalant.

“I mean, I’m in this mess anyway, so why not actually win this?” he replied with a laid-back shrug that was so laid-back, it only amplified the fact that it was not laid-back at all.

“Jungkook,” Minjun said, startling him. Normally, the four of them addressed each other as ‘dude’ or the occasional ‘what the fuck is wrong with you?’. Hearing his name felt strange, almost foreboding.

“There’s so many reasons why not,” Minjun continued. “The most important one being that you come out of this as a winner twice. You get her and you get the bike. But all she gets is the realisation that someone she’s letting back into her life has lied to her.”

Defensively, Jungkook demanded, “when did I lie?”

“You’re getting back together with her because of the bet!”

“It’s not because of—it’s not just because of the bet. I just told you.”

“But she doesn’t know about it,” Minjun countered, poking holes in Jungkook’s feeble defensive shield. It was more like a flimsy piece of paper than a shield, really; just something he’d hoped to fool himself—and you—into believing. “She doesn’t know what else is at stake. It’s not fair.”

“Okay,” Jungkook turned in his seat to face Minjun, leaning his elbow against the bar top. “What are you trying to tell me? That I should lose the bet on purpose? To show her that I care about her more than anything else?”

“No,” Minjun replied, less confident. Jungkook was likely not aware of this, but he could be very intimidating. For Minjun, who considered himself immune to most forms of intimidation after years of being friends with Sid, this was unusual and unsettling. “I’m not telling you anything. I’m just suggesting you think about it. You can’t have your cake and eat it, too.”

Jungkook swallowed, his throat dry.

He knew that he had already drawn a subconscious line between simply wanting you back and wanting you back to win the bet. He worried about the exact thing that Minjun had just mentioned—that he couldn’t have both. He worried that it wouldn’t be fair to be with you again if he won.

This was what stopped him on the bridge. It’s what haunted his mind every time he thought about talking to you.

Deep down, he knew he would have to make a choice: either he won the bet, or he got back together with you.

And yet, he couldn’t let Sid win. The thought pressed on his mind with so much weight that he knew it wasn’t just you that he didn’t want to lose, and it definitely wasn’t just his bike. It was a matter of pride, too.

He was proving a point for all the years that Sid had asserted his superiority over him.

“You know, that never made any sense to me,” Jungkook said. Alcohol helped him feel more confident and less self-conscious. Maybe he should stay tipsy until the end of the bet. “That’s the whole point of the cake. You get it, and it’s not just there to fucking look at. It’s there to be eaten.”

Minjun could tell Jungkook felt defensive, so he didn’t take the aggression personally. Instead, he took a sip of his drink.

“Whatever, man,” he said. “It’s your life, in the end.”

“Yeah. It is,” Jungkook replied so firmly that it just sounded childish. He tried to soften his tone, “I appreciate yo—your concern, but I got this.”

“Okay,” his friend agreed because that was easier. They could have been at it for hours—and God knows, Jungkook and Sid had been at it for hours—but Minjun didn’t think it was worth it. He concluded, “that’s fine.”

“It is,” Jungkook agreed.

But it was clear that it wasn’t fine. Jungkook looked flushed as if he’d bathed in a barrel of whiskey, not merely drank two glasses of it.

After about half an hour, the silence became heavy. At first, Minjun had thought that he would rather throw himself down the stairs than return to the basement where Sid and Jude were. But now that seemed like a better alternative than sitting here with a sulking Jungkook.

“You know, uh, I think I’m going to go check on Sid and Jude,” he said while Jungkook ordered another—his fifth—glass. “Don’t want them to die in Oslo. Too big of a hassle to bring their bodies back home.”

Jungkook’s lip did not even twitch. But he nodded and Minjun slid off his chair. He glanced back at his friend as he went, not wanting to leave him alone, but also feeling like Jungkook was already alone anyway, even with him here.

Jungkook had always been good at isolating himself, even when surrounded by other people. Honestly, Minjun wasn’t sure if Jungkook even realised that he wasn’t sitting at the bar alone. He told Minjun once that he couldn’t stand silence, but Minjun knew that sometimes, Jungkook’s thoughts overwhelmed him without his consent. And once he got lost in his own mind, the rest of the world ceased to exist for him.

However, now that he was truly alone, Jungkook was struck by the heavy weight of his solitude. He would have agreed with Minjun – he really did have a monumental talent for disassociating anywhere, anytime. But to be able to drift off into his thoughts and turn the crowd into a blur, he needed a crowd in the first place.

Now that he was alone, all he could think about was that he was alone.

He certainly wasn’t going to follow his friends into the basement, so he got a few more drinks into his system for courage, and pulled his phone out—a painful reflex—to dial your number.

Needless to say, by the time you answered—it was 1 AM, but, of course, you answered—he was already slurring his words as he tried to explain why he’d called.

“Are you drunk?” was your first question as soon as you heard him try to introduce himself—pointlessly so, because at that point in your life, he was the only person who called you after midnight.

“Of course,” he said, with hints of offence in his voice. Why would he not be drunk? he rationalised.  “Do you want to come?”

He heard shuffling on the other end as he played with the napkin on the bar top. Funnily enough, despite his mind feeling pleasantly numb, he still felt twinges of anxiety in his stomach.

“Where even are you?” you finally asked. He was too drunk to notice the coldness in your voice.

“Sid took us to some bar,” he replied. “In Oslo.”

While you were relieved that Sid hadn’t driven them out of Norway before Jungkook even performed here, you also felt concerned that Jungkook was so disoriented that he needed to remind you of the city you were in.

“Are the rest of the guys there?” you asked. His friends were useless, of course, but perhaps Minjun could be trusted to take care of Jungkook if he blacked out.

“They’re downstairs,” he answered. “There’s some club. I didn’t want to go, so I called you. Do you want to come?”

You were confused by the repeated question—was this a matter of you wanting to come, or were you obligated to come as his manager?

He sensed your apprehension through the phone despite being intoxicated.

“I’m trying to see you,” he explained, his tongue struggling to bend the right way. All his Rs sounded like sloppy Ls and Ws. “You weren’t there when I looked for you earlier today.” You heard a bang – he’d slammed his palm against the bar top, forcing the nearby glasses to rattle – and he continued, whining now, “why are you so difficult for me to find?!”

“You’re drunk,” you stated in response. “And you’re not making any sense. Can you find your way to the bus, or do I have to pick you up?”

Half-mumbling, half-whining something incoherent, Jungkook leaned his arms on the bar top. He rested his head on them and pressed his phone against his ear harder as if that’d make you understand him better, make you enter his head somehow.

“You should come,” he said. “I’ll order for you.”

“How about you tell me exactly where you are first,” you replied.

He did – to the best of his ability in his current state – but Google Maps could hardly help you find the directions for “then we took two left turns and came up in front of his huge red brick building, might have been brown, I’m really drunk.” Finally, you managed to get him to just send you his pinned location and headed over there.

He stayed on his phone after you hung up, opening the Notes app and scrolling through his older notes to pass the time.

Some of them were lists of things he wanted to remember – films to see, songs to listen to – while others were harder to decipher: drunken reminders he had made for himself and forgotten as soon as he sobered up.

Some of the notes were song lyrics, and some were just your name—he’d begun to type out a message? a letter? and abandoned it, scared of the weight your name alone carried—and his finger lingered on those for a minute before he pressed the New Note button and began typing immediately.

Normally, he didn’t write lyrics when he was drunk. Tipsy, maybe—one of Rated Riot’s most popular singles was born after he and Yoongi tried absinthe for the first time at one of the label’s parties last year—but never so drunk that the room felt wobbly.

He kept pressing the wrong buttons on the keyboard and autocorrect kept making it worse; shocking even his drunk mind with how completely wrong the corrections were.

But he managed to get two full lines – I fucking miss you when I drink / You burn my throat when I sing – and he stared at them for a minute, a deep frown on his face.

He hated it. Deleting the words with angry force on the backspace button, he began typing again, feeling furiously alone with every passing minute that you didn’t come—and knowing that when you did come, you would be you. And he couldn’t love you the way he did.

For years, even when he thought—hoped—that the feelings he had for you were not real, even as he insisted to his friends that he couldn’t possibly still love you, even as he tried to meet someone new despite only seeing faint echoes of your absence on every face, even then he wrote about you each time that his mind wandered.

You continued to be the subject of his music, the lyrical lover in every song he wrote.

Now, as he entered line after line, the lyrics writing themselves as he watched the screen, he could feel his heart thumping in his chest—as drunk as his mind was.

When the absence of you is all that inspires / I allow for the pain to turn into fires / It will burn when I write, when I think, when I sing / Flames will turn to ashes, turn to words, turn to ink

He held his phone with one hand as he folded and unfolded a napkin with the other one, reading the words and then re-reading them again.

He wasn’t sure if he liked it. He needed Namjoon to take a look at this—the producer knew better—before he could show it to anyone else. Especially before he sent it to—

Jungkook jumped up when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned his head and his vision seemed to brighten when he recognised you.

“I came as quickly as I could,” you said, out of breath as if you had run all the way here. You took a seat on the stool next to him at the bar, using his shoulder to steady yourself as you climbed onto it. “Where’s your tail?”

Even drunk, he understood you meant his friends.

“Downstairs,” he said, nodding his head towards the door leading to the staircase in the back. “Drinks?”

You assessed him. He didn’t appear to be in need of having his stomach pumped, but he was slouched over the bar, tightly clutching his phone in his hand, which was a good indicator that the night should have ended there.

“I think it’d be better to—”

“Strawberry daiquiri,” he said loudly—to the bartender, but it took you a second to realise that—then he turned to you for confirmation. “Right?”

“I’m not drinking,” you replied firmly enough for him to give you a long look.

“Why not?” he asked. The bartender politely waited for your consent before he started to make the cocktail. “You’re not driving.”

You swallowed. There were many – countless, really – reasons why not. You were confused about yesterday, confused about Nick’s offer, confused about what you were doing here tonight.

This was dangerous. Reckless, even, and very out of character for someone like you. You knew you shouldn’t dive head first into this, not after what happened—what didn’t happen—yesterday.

But you gave the bartender a light nod.

“One drink,” you said. “And we’re going back.”

But, of course, going back is not at all what you did.

Jungkook, his highball, your daiquiri, and you all found yourselves on the empty terrace on the roof not ten minutes later.

It was a relatively warm night, but it was the empty space, the dark night and the faint scent of rain that captivated you more than the warmth. It was so beautiful here; very hard not to be grateful to be alive on a night like this. And you realised you didn’t blame Jungkook for making you come here, after all.

“What were you doing before I came?” you spoke softly, not wanting to disturb the peacefulness of the night.

Jungkook took a sip from his glass and placed it on the small round table between your patio chairs.

“Writing,” he said.

You were surprised. “Writing?”

“Yeah.”

“As in, song lyrics?”

“Yeah,” he repeated. Then—his mind travelling a thousand miles per hour—he added, “you know, I wrote “Haunting” about you.”

Weirdly enough, while alcohol made most people sleepy or, at least slower, it seemed to ignite Jungkook’s mind instead. He wanted to see your reaction when he said this. Wanted, even drunk, to see if there was a reason for him to worry.

Meanwhile, you needed a moment to process what he’d just said and, even then, you weren’t entirely sure if you understood him.

“I—you did?” you stumbled, awkward.

“Yes.”

You looked away, the song fresh in your mind, because it wasn’t just the first Rated Riot song that you’d heard. It was also one of your favourites. You loved the ethereal melody—a strong focus on piano, the guitars reduced to the background and the bass only joining in on the chorus—and Jungkook’s raw vocals as he sang about resisting his dark urges.

You knew all of Rated Riot’s lyrics—hearing their songs every night paid off, but you’d have been lying if you said you didn’t like to listen to them in your free time as well—but it was the first verse and, particularly, the breathy, pained voice with which Jungkook sang it that always tugged at your heart:

It's wandering in my mind / It's haunting my daydreams / I follow after it, blind / I fall apart at the seams

After a minute, you finally spoke—awkward as you explained the meaning of his own lyrics to him, “I always thought it was about… well, searching for thrills even though that’s not good for you.”

“It is,” Jungkook said. “The beginning is. But the chorus is about you.”

Before you could ask anything else, he mouthed the lyrics under his breath so quietly that you were unsure if you weren’t only imagining him singing it since you’d listened to the song so many times before.

Can I find you when I break? / Can I find you when it’s too much? / Can you forgive all my mistakes? / Can you save me with your touch?

Jungkook had written plenty of songs on his own, but from what you’d heard in the studio, his lyrics used to be too abstract. That was the main reason why Namjoon used to scold him.

“It lacks feeling!” he’d shout, agitated by his own expectations for the vocalist. “It’s like you’re singing about a bag of bricks!”

You knew that many of Jungkook’s early songs didn’t have a specific subject in mind. In this particular case, you assumed he was singing about someone—anyone, really—extending a helping hand or providing a shoulder to lean on. It was a comforting song, nothing more than that.

Jungkook was almost grateful for the surprise on your face—he was worried you’d tell him that you knew. He’d always thought it was obvious that this song was about you. After all, you were the only one who was always there for him.

And, in any case, who else would he write about if not you? As soon as he was criticised for lacking emotion in his lyrics, he started to write from experience. And you were his experience.

But, of course, you didn’t think to look for yourself in his lyrics. You didn’t want to find yourself there.

And now you weren’t sure what the appropriate response was when someone told you they wrote a song about you. “Thank you” didn’t seem sufficient, because the song was about you, not for you. “I love it” also didn’t capture it, because you didn’t love it because it was about you. You just did.

So, you remained silent, watching the lights on the skyscraper across the street and the reflection of the dark clouds in the dark windows. The people behind them were likely asleep, resting before they started their day in a few hours.

“I think…” Jungkook began, his sentence ending sooner than he’d expected. His eyes were glossy when you looked at him. “I think I’m writing about you again.”

You swallowed and nervously bit your lower lip. The night was warm, but the wind on the roof was relentless. You couldn’t help shivering.

Your mind was running before you could stop it. You didn’t want to resume your conversation from Stockholm; it had managed to be too much by not being nearly enough. You couldn’t return there again.

But you still asked, “what were you writing?”

“About missing you.”

You sat there, absentmindedly tracing patterns on your dark jeans with the tip of your index finger. You tried to suppress the anticipation building in your stomach before it could fully manifest. Before it could turn into a terrifying disappointment. Before it could show you that you were lying to yourself when you said you’d moved on.

“Please don’t ask me why I’m doing this now,” Jungkook said in a strained whisper.

Your voice faltered as you said, “I won’t.”

“J-just so you know, I felt the same way back home,” he said. “The only difference is that here in Europe, you have no choice but to be around me.”

The implication was clear, even if his voice wasn’t accusing you of anything. He believed you were only spending time with him because your job required you to.

“I don’t… avoid you back home,” you defended weakly—the only way you knew how right now.

Last night, you’d told him you missed him and it didn’t end well. Actually, it didn’t end at all—it sort of hung over you and made this conversation uncomfortable. Like a scratchy sweater, rubbing on your skin in all the wrong ways.

“I know,” he said. “But you never put in special effort to see me, either.”

You took a sip of your cocktail, tossing your head back to finish it.

Placing the glass back down on the table between your seats, you finally said, “I didn’t know you wanted me to, until you brought it up the other day.”

“Yeah. I know that, too,” Jungkook said sadly. His moves mirrored yours as he picked his glass up, but stopped before bringing it to his lips. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. About Stockholm.”

The pounding of your heart was very loud, and your voice was very quiet.

“What are you sorry for?” you asked.

He looked down. “There were a lot of things I wanted to say to you, but I… didn’t know how. It got kind of, um, weird.”

He scoffed at his own choice of words, and you realised that you weren’t alone on this rooftop. There was Discomfort, Awkwardness, and Avoidance dancing around you two.

“It…” you began, but words didn’t come easy. “It shouldn’t have been weird.”

He shook his head. He was worried that this would happen. Worried that you’d take responsibility for last night. You’d say you were the manager, so you should have known better. Should have set stricter boundaries. Should have never crossed them.

Now, you added tentatively, “I-I mean, we’re friends, right?”

You could have smashed your glass on his head and that would have hurt less than the cursed word.

This wasn’t about friendship and you both knew it.

But you needed to feel better. Last night had scared you, he could tell as much. And now you needed to make sense of it. You needed to find a way to interpret it in a way that felt right to your standards.

Normally, he would have helped you. Anything to make you feel comfortable, that’s all he wanted anyway.

But, tonight, he was drunk. And so in love with you that it hurt.

“I don’t know what we are,” he said.

Your hands were restless as you tapped your fingers on your legs.

“I thought that’s what you wanted,” you said. “For us to be friends.”

“It is what I want, but it’s also—it’s much more than just—I’m sorry.” He slid his palms over his cheeks and pressed his hands together against his lips. “I don’t know how to—I could never put my thoughts into words in a way that wouldn’t be too much. Or too little.”

He thought that if his friends would have been here, they would have laughed. Four years he’s wanted you, waited for you, but pretended he didn’t.

Clearly, he needed lessons on how to openly discuss his feelings.

He inhaled—or tried to, anyway—and picked up his drink. You took this as an opportunity to look at him.

“You’re, um—you’re good at putting them into song lyrics, though,” you said.

He chuckled weakly and placed his empty glass down next to yours. There was Sadness, too, twirling on the rooftop. And faint traces of Regret.

“Yeah,” he said. “Maybe I’ll write another song about how much I want you.”

You inhaled too sharply to appear nonchalant. The consecutive “another song” and “I want you” pulsated painfully in your chest.

Alarmed by the sound of your breathing, Jungkook turned to look at you.

“I—sorry,” he said, reading your expression. “I can’t say that, right?”

The fingers of your right hand nervously grasped at the fingers of your left. You regretted not wearing longer clothing that you could pull on.

“No, you, um—well, you can say whatever you feel,” you said. “I just, uh… you know that I can’t say it back.”

He observed your fidgeting and initially interpreted it as discomfort. But now he believed it to be something else—a more prominent emotion, brought on by something other than just this conversation.

Uncertainty.

You said you couldn’t say it back. You meant that you weren’t allowed to, as his manager.

But you didn’t say that you didn’t want to say it back.

His voice trembled when he spoke, the words pouring out in one breath, “but what if we weren’t working together? What if we were somewhere in Oslo, on the roof of some bar, just the two of us? And this fucking never-ending Scandinavian wind, of course,” he paused when he saw a small smile make its way to your lips. “But the wind isn’t telling anyone anything, either. Wh-what would you say then?”

You looked up as if you could actually see the wind. You didn’t know what scared you more: thinking what it’d be like if you weren’t working together—because a few hours ago, that possibility seemed almost real—or admitting your thoughts out loud.

It returned, the heaviness of anticipation that you’d felt last night. You were very naïve to think you could stop it from coming back. To think you could quench the wishful thinking.

This anticipation seemed to control you more than you could control it.

“I’d say that this wind feels like we’re back on campus, loudly talking about our mid-terms and chasing after loose papers that wind had blown out of our hands,” you said. There was a reluctant, nostalgic smile on your face. “Then returning to my dorm room and listening to my neighbours argue about their dead plant, even though they’re both guilty of not looking after it. T-this feels like back then.”

“And how do you feel?” he asked near desperately.

You exhaled, but did not reply. Your skin tingled with pins and needles.

“It’s me,” he said, his tone gentler now. “There’s no one else here.”

And there it was – the moment that didn’t come in Stockholm.

Dizzy, you said, “I feel the same way as I did back then.”

Jungkook held his breath.

“I really need you to tell me,” he pleaded, “what way.”

You pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear and focused on suppressing the goosebumps that arose on every part of your skin that his eyes touched.

“Just… exhilarated. From life. From love,” you spoke, your eyes fluttering to him. Frightened by the intensity of his gaze as he watched you, you looked back at the edge of the roof. “From you.”

You heard his breath quiver.

“Look at me,” he asked in a stern, yet powerless whisper.

You did—and he forgot what he was going to say.

He felt like you were both back there again, too. Like nothing had changed—because nothing had, not fundamentally—like he could reach out and you’d be there. Providing him with the noise he needed to not feel alone, and the comfort he needed to not feel overwhelmed.

Neither of you realised that he had leaned in until you felt the warmth of his breath—laced with a strong scent of whiskey—on your lips. Until your lungs started to burn from holding your breath so hard. Until you parted your lips slightly and the oxygen that slipped in was so full of echoes of his taste that you felt the roof turning upside down.

He closed his eyes as he lingered millimetres away from you, the close proximity putting you both in a trance so painfully blissful that not connecting your lips seemed almost sacrilegious.

You were hypnotised, too overwhelmed by the familiarity of the feeling—the barely thereness of his lips against yours—to think of anything else.

You couldn’t pull away.

But, in a blind panic, he was the one who did.

Blinking in surprise as he moved away, you found yourself frozen, eyes locked on the empty space in front of you.

Jungkook stared at the ground, breathless and wide-eyed.

Even drunk, he couldn’t do this.

There was Minjun’s face in his head—his initial discomfort the first time he found out about the bet. There was the conversation in the bar—and the cake metaphor, even though Jungkook thought he neither had the cake, nor could he eat it. There was Sid in his head, too—his smug grin as he insisted Jungkook would lose.

He couldn’t breathe.

He could hear white noise in place of thoughts, and something else, too—his own screams.

What did I do, what did I do, what did I do, what did I—

You couldn’t hear his attempts to inhale because as soon as he pulled away, your own thoughts grew louder. The realisation of what had happened again—what had almost happened again—was so strong, it almost pushed you down to the floor. You had to grip your chair not to double over from the weight of it.

You knew he was drunk, despite seemingly sobering up a bit on the roof. And he pulled away. Meanwhile, you’d had a few drinks tonight and you were going to let him—were waiting for him to—kiss you.

Somehow, he’d managed to exhibit more rationality while intoxicated, than you could while nearly sober.

You stood up.

Pausing for a second as you debated if you should give him an excuse for why you were leaving, you mumbled something about calling him a taxi, and walked away without turning back.

The door slammed shut behind you, but Jungkook still didn’t dare to lift his gaze. He was too focused on clenching his fists so he wouldn’t throw the empty glasses down the side of the roof.

Alone on the staircase, you welcomed the emotion that had trailed after you all the way from Sweden.

You were angry.

But not at this. Not at what could’ve happened and didn’t. Not at him, not for leaning in, and not for pulling away.

You were angry at yourself. For letting yourself wish for something you shouldn’t have wished for. And for feeling disappointed when your wish didn’t come true.

Twice, you’ve found yourself on the edge of almost. Twice.

Last night, you’d told him it was easy to get overwhelmed by all the memories that your time together has brought back. But perhaps it wasn’t him who got overwhelmed. Perhaps it was you.

Perhaps seeing each other so often had blurred the lines, and you found yourself forgetting. Found yourself yearning. Hoping.

But the fact remained—and you repeated it in your head over and over again as you climbed the stairs down from the roof, clutching the railing as if your life depended on it—you broke up for a reason. You broke up for a reason. You broke up for a reason.

It was shocking how little that reason mattered when you closed your eyes in the taxi ten minutes later, and all you could picture was what it would’ve been like if you’d been the one to close the distance between your lips tonight.

And as thoughts of Reconnaissance and Nick’s offer returned to your mind on the ride back, you wondered if tonight was a pro or a con.

chapter title credits: bad omens, “careful what you wish for”

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[personasintro]

Mutual Help | #41

↳ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬; in order for you to pretend to be his girlfriend, he helps you with your sexual desires ⏤ he calls it mutual help

⇢ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: jungkook x reader

⇢ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fake dating au, fluff, angst, smut, slow burn

⇢ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: explicit language

⇢ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 14.7k+

⇠ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯. | 𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐱 | 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ⇢ 

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

That's what you are for drinking so much, wanting to drink away your hurt feelings and thoughts away. What did you think?

Your head is about to burst, you've barely slept since you've woken up at a random time, kept tossing every few minutes while your stomach hurts. Now that the sun is already up, you're not sure what time it is because you barely move and checking your phone is the least of your worries.

You groan, stomach hurting even more with each slightest move you make. The whole cabin is quiet and you guess it's because everyone is still sleeping, trying to sleep off their own hangover. Who knows when the party truly stopped, since you were the first one in bed. Even pregnant Jia stayed longer at the party than you did, but then... pregnant Jia wasn't drunk as fuck.

Most of the night is hazy, but you do remember a lot of things and actually, you think you remember everything. From the moment you started drinking and felt like you're tipsy, to the moment of Jungkook carrying you to your room.

Jungkook. Oh god.

You're not sure whether your stomach churns from the actual hangover or the thought of Jungkook and what you put him through yesterday–slash–today. However, there's no time for guilt or to continue thinking about this matter, not when you feel your stomach turn and you're sure it's no longer just that.

You sit up straight, a weird lump forming in your throat just when your eyes fall on the orange bucket beside your bed. Without thinking, you quickly reach for it and barely make it without vomiting all over the sheets before you're emptying your stomach into the bucket. Your weak hands are gripping the edge of it, knowing Jungkook must've put it here before he left. You remember drifting off to sleep while he kept rubbing your back, just as you pleaded him to do.

Eyes watering, you feel how sensitive your stomach is once you stop and just breathe heavily, nose scrunching at the scent of your vomits and alcohol combined. Fortunately, it seems like you've thrown up everything you could. You're too weak to move, so you sit there for a moment not believing your own body. It's better to stay like this just in case.

Momentarily distracted from your disgusting state, you're surprised to see the door of your room slowly opening from the corner of your room. It's barely opened when you see Jungkook's head poking out from the tiny space he opened. You catch his widening eyes once he sees you already awake with the bucket in your grasp and tears streaming down your cheeks from you vomiting.

He lets out a sound of pity, eyes filled with empathy as enters the room and quickly shuts the door.

"Go away," you weakly tell him, looking away as you scrunch your nose when the smell of your vomits hits your nose. "I look like hell."

Jungkook doesn't find himself to find your comment amusing, even though you're right. You do look like hell, but if you thought that would stop him then you're wrong.

Once you glance at Jungkook, you find him walking towards you causing you to whine. "Jungkook."

He looks tired, eyes slightly puffy from the lack of sleep and his raven hair is disheveled as if he hasn't brushed it today yet. He's wearing some black sweatpants with a large fossil grey shirt, which still can be seen as a bigger effort than you put since you look like you just woke up from the dead.

Before you can scold Jungkook for coming here and seeing you like this, your stomach turns once again and you start throwing up all over again. And here you thought you emptied everything, you almost want to laugh bitterly at yourself.

He ignores your previous whines, sitting next to you before your hair is pushed away from your face as he wraps his hand around it, keeping it behind you in a ponytail.

"It's okay," he assures you, the other hand gently rubbing your back as you shake your head. "Let it all out, you'll feel better."

Oh, fuck... this is so fucking embarrassing. This is the price you've to pay for drinking so much. You're not sure if Jungkook ever witnessed you vomiting years of your friendship. If he did, nothing can top this time because you can't seem to stop.

But Jungkook is there, glued to your side even when he smells the distant stench of your vomit and hears the sounds of you vomiting, assuring you that it's fine from time to time. It seems as if his words go completely unnoticed by you, he wouldn't be surprised if they did since you seem busy to even notice anything else besides the way your stomach hurts and desperately tries to get everything out of it. The truth is, you register him and his attempt to soothe you, and you're thankful for it nevertheless.

Once it seems like you're done, you spit into the bucket as you feel a weird taste in your mouth, cringing at yourself from disgust.

"You're done?" Jungkook asks gently, still rubbing soothing circles into your skin as you weakly nod. "Alright, let me clean this up and I'll be back with some water and painkillers."

Jungkook stands up, coming up to your side as you see his tattooed arm reaching for the bucket. You look up at him, your eyes watery and mouth wet from your spit, probably the most disgusting sight he could've ever seen of you. But surprisingly, Jungkook smiles at you and strokes your cheek briefly, as he assures you he's right back before he's gone.

You sit there for a moment, wondering what the hell you did to deserve him. Your stomach still hurts, undoubtedly still sensitive from all the drinking and vomiting, so you decide to slowly lay down. Staring at the ceiling, you're trying to close your eyes to get some peace but your head is thinking otherwise because it seems like it pounds even more.

Just like Jungkook promised, he's back in a record time – bringing a glass of water, a pack of painkillers, the same bucket again for some reason and then he has something else in his hands which proves to be a mouthwash you get your eyes on once he sets the things on the nightstand.

"I brought you this," he says, showing you the mouthwash which you take with grateful eyes and quickly open it. He hands you the bucket, watching you as you rinse your mouth with it and spit it into the bucket once you're done.

Jungkook moves automatically and quickly, setting down the bucket before he hands you a glass of water. He opens the box, popping out two tablets of painkillers, handing them to you too. You don't hesitate, swallowing it right away.

"Thank you," you tell him gently, voice slightly raspy which makes Jungkook's features soften even more. "God, this is so embarrassing." you groan as Jungkook takes the empty glass from you and sets it back on the nightstand.

You lay down, staring at the ceiling once again for a moment before you get the courage to glance at Jungkook who sits beside you.

"It's not embarrassing," he tells you, chuckling slightly. Knowing him, he's saying that just to ease your embarrassment like any good friend would do. "Do you feel better?" He changes the topic before you can protest, blubbering how disgusting you are.

"I feel like shit," you answer instead, "But thank you though. For taking care of me."

Jungkook smiles, slightly shaking his head. "I was about to check on you, I thought you'd be still sleeping. You drank a lot."

"I know," you whine, genuinely disappointed at yourself and most importantly, cursing at yourself for drinking that much. Why do you've to be so fucking stubborn? "I'm sorry I was such a pain in the ass, still am."

Jungkook chuckles at that, front teeth poking out of his mouth. "Nothing I couldn't handle." he tells you lightly, causing a little amused smile to spread on your lips.

You look at him, your smile slowly drifting away once you focus on his tired features. But Jungkook doesn't know that's what's bothering you, thinking you're just too embarrassed once again.

"You're tired." you comment, pointing out the obvious.

Jungkook cringes through a grin, not disagreeing with you. "Yeah, I barely slept. We had to take care of Taehyung because he passed out on the couch. He threw up on his bed, so we had to change his sheets too if that makes you better," Jungkook says, glancing at you amusingly as you purse your lips.

"It doesn't."

"Anyway, we went to bed around five." he explains, causing you to frown.

"Wait, what time is it?" you ask, wondering about the time which causes Jungkook to shrug but he reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone.

"Nine twenty-three."

You gasp, frowning at Jungkook. "You've barely slept, go to sleep, Kook. I'm fine." you assure him.

"Nah, it's fine. I was about to work-out but I don't think I can." he chuckles and as on cue, he yawns but tries to mask it. It's too late, you obviously hear and see him causing you to raise a brow at him.

"Come on, just lay down for a moment. You need a rest," you tell him, tapping the space beside you as he looks at your hand before he amusingly grins at you. "I could use some back rubbing."

"Uh-uh," Jungkook purses his lips, searching your eyes for a moment as you pout at him. Rolling his eyes at you, he shakes his head a bit before he sighs. "Fine, but just for a few minutes."

He's getting on the other side of the bed, crawling through your legs which makes you groan when he puts a little too much weight on your body. Apologizing, he shoots you an innocent grin before he lays down next to you. You share your duvet with him, causing him to pleasantly hum as he makes himself comfortable.

"You should eat something though," he murmurs, closing his eyes for a moment. He's much more tired than he would admit, that much you can tell by simply just watching him. "Chicken soup or something."

You hum, turning to your side to face him. He's laying on his back, eyes slowly closing as another yawn pushes past his lips as he covers his mouth with his hand.

"Do you want me to rub your back?" he asks sleepily.

"No, I'm good." you tell him, lips curling to an amused smile when Jungkook keeps his eyes closed, mumbling something you can't understand.

The painkillers Jungkook gave you start to work and you feel the pain in your head slowly but surely go away, causing your own tiredness to get to you. Your eyes close, Jungkook's soft breathing the only thing you hear as you go back to sleep – both of you are already asleep within five minutes.

It feels as if you've been sleeping for a whole eternity and you're not planning on waking up any time soon, knowing your hangover practically needs all the rest and sleep you can get, so you can feel better. You're about to flip on the other side, your mind ready to go back to sleep even when you're haunted by the recent events and Haneul in your dreams, when you hear a raspy groan beside you.

Opening your eyes, you're met with Jungkook rubbing his sleepy eyes.

"Shit," he grunts, glancing at you to find you already peering at him with the same sleepy eyes. He chuckles at the mess on your head that is called hair, but you're too groggy to even realize or think about it. "I wasn't planning on falling asleep." he murmurs, scratching his right cheek.

Sighing, you turn on your back, eyes glancing at the ceiling for a moment before you look at Jungkook when you hear him sit up. The hair on the back of his head is standing in different directions that makes you snort under your breath, causing Jungkook to glance at you with a confused frown before he realizes you must be laughing at his appearance.

"You don't look any better, you know?"

He lets out a raspy cackle when you slap him on his back, telling him to 'fuck off'.

"I got wasted and threw up everything that was in my stomach, that's my excuse for my appearance. What's yours?" you raise your brow, stretching your arms as you finally feel your stomach gaining its strength, even though it's still very much sensitive and empty.

"You, woman." he answers, causing your brows to frown.

"How am I an excuse for your appearance?" you snort, smirking when you see him trying to fix his protruding hair at the back of his head.

"Because you lured me into your bed." he jokes, wiggling his brows as you snort again, shaking your head at him. But when he reaches for you and pokes you in your cheek, you frown and slap his hand away which makes him laugh.

"I'm irresistible," you hum, "What can I say?"

Now is Jungkook's turn to snort, raising his brow at you amusingly as he stands up, scratching the back of his neck.

"You're a lot of things, just not sure if irresistible is one of them," he purposely says, waiting for you to react because he knows exactly what kind of reaction you will have. And when you reach for the pillow he slept on and throw it at him, he easily catches it with a knowing smirk. He tosses the pillow back onto bed, grabbing his phone to look at the screen before he glances back at you.

"Are you feeling better?" he asks, causing you to nod as you give him a slight smile, showing your gratitude which doesn't have to be spoken. "I'm not sure if anyone is awake now, but if I recall, a good chicken soup is on today's menu,"

Ah, chicken soup. The greatest cure for a hangover.

"I can make you some, if you want."

You feel bad and grateful at the same time, touched by Jungkook's kindness even though you'd expect nothing else.

"You've already done enough for me, Kook. I'm fine, I'll just eat whatever is in the fridge." you assure him, but Jungkook is not very pleased by that which you can see as soon as you say it out loud and by the way he automatically frowns.

"Don't be ridiculous," he scoffs lightly, "You need to eat something warm."

You open your mouth but before you can utter a single word, Jungkook is flashing you with a cocky grin as he turns around and leaves the room. You chuckle, shaking your head as you fall back into bed.

Five more minutes and then you'll have to get your ass into a shower. You feel dirty and a nice shower will probably make you feel better. Unfortunately, it can't wash away those remaining hurt feelings and thoughts.

Jungkook can cook. Kind of. He's the king of cooking ramen. And he can cook some decent meals too since he's been living alone for a few years now, unfortunately without his mother's home-food that he occasionally misses – sometimes too much.

Chicken soup isn't hard to cook, he told himself on his way downstairs. And although he knows the recipe, but still googled a few recipes just to make sure and even watched two youtube videos, he finds himself a little insecure about his cooking skills. He questions them, even after Jimin has come downstairs shortly after and found his younger friend watching a cooking video with a slight scowl on his face.

Thankfully, after Jimin informed him about Taehyung being hungover just like you, they ended up cooking the soup together. A few people come and go, like Seokjin who made a quick breakfast for his wife before he quickly disappeared back upstairs. Or Hoseok, who grabbed a few painkillers, disappeared even faster than Seokjin when Jimin asked him if he wanted to help with the cooking.

Both of them know Hoseok is not a fan of cooking, but it still made them laugh while Hoseok flipped them off before he truly walked away with painkillers and his killing head.

"How is she?"

Jungkook knew the question was coming, Jimin's occasional stares gave away that much. And although, they both talked about Taehyung throwing up in the morning just like you did – the only difference is that apparently Taehyung threw up in the middle of the night too – he knows Jimin isn't asking about your current physical state but more like psychical.

"She's fine, I think," Jungkook sighs, leaning against the kitchen counter with arms crossed over his chest, meanwhile Jimin lifts up the cover and cringes when the steam hits his face. Jungkook snorts, but is pleased with the delicious smell of the soup. "I don't know... she's too hungover now."

Jimin nods, sighing as he leans on the opposite side of Jungkook to look at him. "It sucks."

It's simple but very much true. Jungkook is not sure if he'd be able to sum it up better.

The two of them have a casual conversation after that, tasting the soup every few minutes to make sure it's all good and cooked well before they bring it to you and Taehyung.

By the time the soup is done, Jungkook has gone to his room to check on Kiko and ask her if she needs anything, just to find her still sleeping. She had to be awake at some point but probably went back to sleep. She didn't get drunk last night, but she still went to bed late so it makes sense she's feeling tired.

You're still laying in bed when the door of your room opens, the difference is that you're freshly out of the shower and you've changed your clothes. Hair still damp from your shower, Jungkook's eyes flicker to you as he makes sure not to spill the steaming soup.

An appreciative smile spreads on your lips at the sight of him and you slowly sit up before Jungkook puts the tray into your lap. "Thank you."

Jungkook smiles back, standing there for a moment before he notices something. You're wearing the knitted yellow sweatshirt he gave you. Sitting down beside you, he eyes you as you take the spoon into your hands.

"You'll burn your tongue, blow on it." Jungkook reminds you softly when he sees the spoon inches from your mouth.

You snort, rolling your eyes at him as you raise your brows at him. "Really? I didn't know that," You feign oblivion which makes him roll his eyes at you. "Alright dad."

Jungkook glares at you, huffing from annoyance but keeps his mouth shut as he stares at you with doe eyes while you taste the soup for the first time. You're not clueless to his stare, suddenly feeling insecure under his eyes for some reason. In your defense, you don't like when someone's watching you eat and right now, that is exactly what he's doing.

"Jesus, what?" You can't wait any longer, voicing your thoughts when Jungkook's eyes snap to yours and you almost melt at the softness and innocence of his big eyes.

"Does it taste good?" he asks, genuinely curious and you can't help but find it cute causing you to smile.

"Of course it does," you assure him, "What Jeon Jungkook does not know?" you tease him, causing him to playfully roll his eyes but there's a proud smile on his lips, or more like pleased one at your sudden praise.

You slowly eat the soup, appreciating the warm liquid making its way down to your sensitive and empty stomach while Jungkook fills you up about whatever Jimin has told him. Once you're done, Jungkook stands up and takes the tray from you and sets it on one of the dressers.

"Taehyung is a party animal, I'm sure he'll be back to partying tomorrow as if he never drank in the first place."

At that, you've to laugh because Jungkook is right. No matter how much Taehyung is hungover, he's usually back to square one as soon as he feels once again – which can't be told about you. You don't want to be near alcohol for at least a few weeks before you get the courage to taste it. Just the thought of the taste of it makes you gag.

"Did they say how long they're staying here?" you ask, watching Jungkook stretch his neck before he sits back onto his previous spot, shrugging.

"I think they want to stay for another two days at least," he answers, "Why?"

"Well... I was thinking of going home," Jungkook's features soften and you quickly continue, "I don't know, I like it here but I don't feel like staying longer."

Jungkook nods in understatement, a little saddened that you want to leave. He knows what's the reason behind it and he's not surprised. He doesn't waste time to try persuading you to stay, even though he'd make sure you're having a good time. He can guess what you're feeling and he knows you just want the comfort of your home.

"Didn't you guys talk about how long you're staying? You came together." Jungkook asks, causing you to nod.

"Yeah, well the plan was to stay for a couple of days but you know... that can change every minute."

It's absolutely normal that they'd want to stay longer or the opposite. And it's absolutely normal that plans change.

"Yeah," Jungkook agrees, "I can just drive you home, if you want." he offers and you immediately widen your eyes and shake your head.

You definitely don't want to be any more of a burden than you already are for Jungkook. Even though you know he doesn't see you that way and is completely fine with driving you home, it feels like a burden.

"No, it's okay. I'll just stay and wait for Jimin and Tae. It's fine, really." you assure him, but Jungkook sees right through you and even though you say you're fine, he sees the little displeasure on your face by the news.

He knows you really want to go home.

"Knowing them, they'll probably stay even longer. I mean, if you told them I think they'd go home earlier."

"No, no, no," you disagree right away, "I don't want to ruin this trip for them. They like it here, it's fine. I don't want them to go earlier because of me."

"Listen," Jungkook sighs, "I can just drive you home and before you start interjecting," You close your mouth when he says that, causing him to chuckle knowingly. "I'm completely fine with it. Really, it's no bother for me. This way Jimin and Taehyung get to spend their time here for as long as they want and everyone will be pleased."

It does make sense. Unfortunately, Jungkook has already done enough for you and to be honest, you don't think you deserve him taking care of you. Especially when you were acting like a bitch and didn't make it easier for him.

"It's a four hour long drive." you point out, displeased tone in your voice as Jungkook shrugs.

"So? It's not that far away," Four hour is kind of a long drive. If it was closer, you'd probably accept his offer. "Y/N, stop being stubborn. Besides, I think I'll go home tomorrow too."

"You are?" you ask surprised.

"Yeah, one of my clients texted me and asked me if I'm able to do their family photoshoot. They're leaving for another country in five days to visit their family overseas, apparently they want to get those pictures printed and give it to them. I wouldn't go but it's good money and honestly, as much as it's nice here, I feel like I want to go home too." he explains and you just wonder--

"So, you would leave me here if I stayed?" you tease him, but you can't help but be genuinely curious what would happen.

The main reason for you staying here is to spend the time with your friends. As much as Jimin and Taehyung are your friends and you'd be fine with being with them, it's not the same without Jungkook and you'd feel a little down of his sudden leave. Especially when he asked you to come here in the first place.

"Of course not," he answers right away, chuckling. "I asked you to come here, I wouldn't leave."

That settles a comforting feeling in you and you can't help but smile at him in a silent appreciation. He looks a little offended that you'd think otherwise, but it's all a very playful act as he just purses his lips and grins at you.

"I don't know, Kook..." you mutter, staring at your lap as you let out a sigh.

"Hey," Jungkook calls out, urging you to look at him. "I heard Namjoon and Maya are leaving tomorrow. I'm not sure if Hoseok is staying for long too." And he talked to Kiko yesterday when the client texted him. He hasn't texted him back because he was busy with other things, you being one of them, but he was planning on texting him back today to kindly decline his offer. Kiko was fine with leaving too and now that you want to leave too, it's not that big of a problem to leave.

But he doesn't tell you about Kiko, not wanting to bring her up when it's not necessary.

"That doesn't sound practical though, you are traveling eight hours to Seoul and back here just to leave tomorrow."

"Don't worry about me." Jungkook dismisses you easily, although you don't look too convinced.

"I don't know, Kook. I feel like--"

"Look, here's the plan," he interrupts you, taking your silence as a clue to continue. Not that he cares, you get the feeling he's too determined to share his plan with you. "I'll drive you home today, I'm leaving tomorrow anyway. I could just leave today too but I've to drive Kiko home,"

Of course, he does. He's not that big of an asshole to just leave someone else to drive her home when she came with him in the first place. That makes sense to you too, so you're not surprised by the information.

And you know it'd be way easier if the three of you drove home today or tomorrow together, but Jungkook also knows the ride would be a torture for everyone. You feel bad for being so difficult. If you weren't so mad at Kiko, you could just drive together and Jungkook wouldn't have to drive twice. And you almost tell him that, comically sacrificing yourself to spend four hours with her in a car but before you can, Jungkook continues.

"I think she wants to spend another day with Jia anyway, so we'll stay until tomorrow."

Jungkook sees you nibbling on your nails, knowing it's your habit when you're thinking about something and you're not so sure about it. But he lets you, letting you think it through because he won't force you. However, he knows you want to go home and that's why you're even considering this.

"I don't want to cause any trouble, Kook." you tell him unsurely, causing his brows to frown.

"What do you mean?"

You can't believe you're being worried about his relationship, but the rational part of you can't help it because you do feel bad. And you know it's only because you care about Jungkook and appreciate how kind he has been towards you. But that's nothing new.

"Well, you, spending the whole day away from... Kiko," Even her name sounds weird coming out of your mind and it surely goes noticed by Jungkook, but he doesn't comment on it but you see him pursing his lips a little. "You've already taken care of my ass since yesterday. I'm sure she'd appreciate spending some time with you. Not that I care but... she probably thinks I'm annoying because I know I'd be if my boyfriend was spending more time with his best friend than me."

Jungkook fights the urge to smile. This is you. You've this tough act whenever you're angry but deep down, you really care. You consider other feelings and you just proved it again, but it's not like Jungkook hasn't known that about you. But it's nice to witness it once again.

"She doesn't think you're annoying, Y/N," he clarifies which you roll your eyes at but he ignores it.

You might be right. Even though he tried to spend some time with her, you were on his mind a lot which she obviously noticed but never voiced out loud. Then you didn't exactly make it easy and he tried to save you from embarrassment or doing something you'd regret later on. But to be fair, if it weren't for Kiko he wouldn't have to worry about you because Haneul would most likely be still here and you wouldn't be hurt.

You needed him more than Kiko did, that's the truth. But this doesn't mean he doesn't feel like an asshole boyfriend for barely spending some time with his own girlfriend. He'll talk to her later.

"Besides, I don't need permission to drive home my best friend." he adds, teeth nibbling on your bottom lip to hide a smile when he says that.

It does sound satisfying when he says it, you can't help it.

Opening your mouth, you're ready to accept his offer after considering pros and cons when your phone buzzes with a notification. You reach for the phone mindlessly, ready to check it without much thinking but your features freeze when you see Haneul's name. It's a simple message, yet it makes an uneasy stomach settle in your stomach once again. This is what you wanted, you wanted him to reach out to you first but now that he finally has, you're surprised.

Haneul: can we talk ?

Jungkook watches your odd reaction, probably guessing what it means when he sees you staring at the screen before you glance up and stare at him.

"It's Haneul," you confirm Jungkook's silent suspicion and even though your best friend frowns at the mention of the guy he got to punch, he stays silent. "He wants to talk."

Now he scoffs, not being able to stay silent but he still doesn't say anything else and simply watches you and gives you space to think it through, before you slowly start typing.

"when?" You type back, locking the phone as you toss it onto your lap with a thoughtful gaze.

It seems as though Haneul has been waiting for your response because it comes in a few seconds. You're not sure what to think of it though. It's hard to figure out what Haneul thinks and the message is obviously lacking any kind of emotion. It's blunt and straight to the point, maybe that's why it makes you nervous. You're also not sure why you're nervous, you're mad at him for disrespecting you. Why the hell are you the one who's nibbling on her bottom lip anxiously?

Haneul: whenever you want 

"What did he say?" Jungkook asks, voice blunt and annoyed.

"He wants to talk whenever I want..." you murmur, still not texting him back.

Do you want to talk to him immediately? Or do you need some time to think about the whole thing alone? You had enough time to think about it, but to be honest you were replaying what happened and thought about how hurt you are rather than thinking about what your next move is going to be.

"Good, then don't talk to him." Jungkook exclaims carelessly, causing you to look at him.

"Jungkook..." you sigh, not surprised to see the annoyance and anger that's aimed at Haneul.

"Now he wants to talk? He leaves you here crying, heartbroken and now he has the guts to text you wanting to talk?" His voice is not loud or sounding too angry, but hard enough to detect a little bit of anger and annoyance. He's simply pointing out something you already know.

You know Jungkook is right, he did leave you here crying and heartbroken when he could've handled it another way. More mature way. But who are you to judge? You've no control over how he or anyone else handles things. However, you do wish he would just at least talk to you before he has decided to leave so abruptly.

"I've to talk to him one way or another," you tell Jungkook, seeing him sighing but he lets it go, knowing that's for the best. It's also the only right decision because you both don't know where you stand and it has to be discussed. "I still can't believe you punched him though." you suddenly say, chuckling a little as Jungkook stares dumbfoundedly at you for a moment before he shrugs.

"It's what he deserved."

Snorting, you don't argue. He's right. You still don't like that he punched someone because of you.

"How are your knuckles?" you ask, looking down at his hand as he looks at it and spreads his fingers to get a closer look causing him to shrug.

"Good as new."

You roll your eyes, snatching his hand as you tug it closer to your face to inspect his skin. The tattoos slightly cover the little red blemishes he has there, the only proof he punched your boyfriend. Your fingers trace against the little wound, glancing at his face to see his reaction and if it hurts or not, but Jungkook just stares right back at you, completely unbothered.

"Good as new my ass," you murmur, frowning at the slightly reddened skin. Well, it doesn't look that bad but still, it's there. "Thanks, though." you tell him suddenly, causing him to frown as you let go of his hand.

"For punching him," you clarify before you breathe out a chuckle. "Is that a weird thing? To thank you for punching my boyfriend?"

Jungkook joins, chuckling as he shrugs. "It's not weird to thank me for punching someone who disrespected you," he says, laughter dying down as his features soften while he's looking at you. "But you don't have to thank me for that. You know I'd do it again."

You smile at that, nodding. "I think I need to thank you for that. Not just for punching him, actually. But for having my back."

"Always," he tells you, both of you sharing a look that makes you clear your throat as you inhale a huge breath while looking away. "You know I always have your back." he shrugs casually, sending you a grin.

"Yeah, I know," you tell him, genuinely touched by his words. "And I thank you for that whether you think I should or shouldn't." you tease, seeing him snorting while he rolls his eyes.

It's like your thing. Rolling eyes at each other constantly. But you wouldn't change that for anything else. In times like these you realize, or more like you're reminded, how genuine and precious your friendship with Jungkook is. How precious and genuine is he.

"God, woman, you're driving me crazy." he groans, causing you to laugh as he feigns annoyance.

"Wouldn't be the first time," you shrug casually, knowing you're getting on Jungkook's nerves often and he always lets it slide. It's not like he can do something about it, is it? "But no really, Kook. I actually wanted to apologize, well for everything. I acted childishly, stupid, like a bitch..." you trail off, noticing how Jungkook nods, silently agreeing you while pursing his lips which makes you smack him in the arm.

Both of you laugh at that, none of you surprised when he dodges your arm easily and pokes you in your rib in return.

"I put you in an uncomfortable position, even though I knew I'd somehow hurt you. That's not what friends do. It wasn't fair to you. God, can't you just be an awful friend?" you joke, laughing shakily as you hear him chuckle before you genuinely stare at him with an apologetic look in your eyes.

"You don't have to apologize again, you've already apologized to me." he reminds you softly, eyes telling you to just drop it because he sees how much it worries you. But you have to say it.

"Yeah, while being drunk," you snort, "I want you to know how genuine and serious I am about this. And I'm pretty sure I'd fucking embarass myself if you weren't there. I still think I embarrassed myself enough but it'd be even worse if you seriously weren't there."

"Fuck what others think," Jungkook shrugs, "I know you're genuine about this. I know you, dummy, don't you know that?" he teases you, causing you to glare at him but there is a small smile dancing on your lips.

"Jeon," you call out sternly suddenly. "Just let me apologize in peace, so I don't feel like a total bitch."

"Alright, alright," he laughs, "But you're not a total bitch, though. Maybe just a small one." he jokes, laughing like a maniac when you grab the pillow behind you and start smacking him with it.

"Yah!" he exclaims through laughing, eyes scrunched at the end while he gives you a toothy grin.

You stop, glaring at him playfully before you toss the pillow behind you.

"But I'll give you that, I'm a bitch." you agree, chuckling at yourself as Jungkook frowns a little.

"Hey, I was just joking. You're not a bitch," he tells you softly.

You smile at him, glancing at your phone. The silence follows after, Jungkook noticing the direction your eyes are looking at. "So, what's the next move?"

You sigh, "I'll talk to him and then see how I feel about it. I don't really wanna come to some hasty conclusion when I haven't even talked to him since... you know what."

Jungkook nods, keeping his lips in a straight line but it's so obvious he wants to say something which makes you roll your eyes again. For the hundredth times today.

"Just spill it if you've something to say." you demand bluntly, causing him to sigh.

"Nah, I'm just gonna keep that to myself. It's not my relationship, you should do whatever feels comfortable for you." He waves his hand at you, but you know him long enough that his mouth is saying one thing but his eyes scream completely another one.

You're eyeing him suspiciously, knowing he's not very pleased with your decision but he realizes it's not his decision to make and he actually respects your own. It's something you failed to do in his relationship for quite some time. It's not your proudest moment but you also know it's because the two of you have each other's back.

"Fine," you mutter, "I know you hate his guts and don't want him near me." you inform him and Jungkook carelessly shrugs, not even denying it.

You unblock your phone, thumbs hovering over the screen for a second before you open his message and start typing. "I'm going home today" you text back, settling on a simple message. You're not exactly inviting him to meet today, but you're giving him information and it's up to him what he'll do with it.

You're not sure if you want him to meet somewhere public. It's not like you're scared to be with him in public, but you've a serious topic to talk about and it's probably best if you met somewhere private. You don't need any prying ears around you, especially not when you'll discuss your relationship.

Laying back down, you toss your phone beside you when the door of your room snaps open, your friends coming there like a tornado. You barely get the glimpse of Taehyung's nest on his head, briefly noticing him still wearing his pajamas before he's running towards you, jumping on your bed as he cuddles to you.

"Hey, my party soulmate." he greets you, a fresh scent of toothpaste coming off him as you snort at him, letting him hug you.

"How are you so energized? I'm dying here." you complain, seeing Taehyung glancing up at you as he sends you a boxy grin.

"Practice, experience... call it whatever."

You and Taehyung laugh together, fool around by Taehyung pressing himself against you while you're playfully trying to get him off you. Meanwhile you're like two little kids, your giggles filling the room, Jungkook informs Jimin about you possibly leaving today.

"You're leaving?" Jimin asks loudly, eyes big and wide while his plush lips pout slightly.

"What? No!" Taehyung gasps, releasing you as he sits up to look at you properly.

"Tae, stop being dramatic, we can see each other whenever." you tell Taehyung, ignoring how he's purposely pouting at you.

Jungkook snorts, earning a childish glare from him as you sigh at your friends. "I don't know, it's nice here but I want to go home. I don't think I can enjoy the rest of this trip, not until I sort some things out."

Jimin and Taehyung stare at you confusingly, not quite sure what you want to sort out and before they can think about it, Jungkook already explains it bluntly.

"The idiot texted her."

There we go.

Jungkook is completely unbothered when you send him a glare, silently scolding him for saying it even though you know you'd say it anyway.

"What?"

"Oh, you can't be serious!"

Their loud voices cause you to wince but you shush them immediately, explaining to them the same thing you explained to Jungkook. That you need to figure out your relationship, you can't just stop talking to him. That's not how you like things, besides if you're about to end or continue this relationship, you need some sort of closure about what happened here.

Even though their dramatic response is quite predictable, them having your back and automatically jumping on that hate train towards Haneul, they're understanding as always.

"I still think he deserved that second punch, just so he knows he shouldn't mess with you." Taehyung says with pursed lips, the three of you glancing at him with raised brows as he looks oddly proudly at his thoughts.

"I'm sure he knows that by now." you chuckle, cringing when you think about Haneul's bleeding nose. It must have hurt like hell.

"Yeah, thanks to Jungkook, look at him," Taehyung says, making his way to Jungkook as he grabs his arm and starts squeezing his biceps which makes you snort while Jungkook stares at Taehyung with raised brows.

Jimin is holding back laughter, already knowing what's about to happen.

"Look at this man," Taehyung exclaims dramatically and you bite back your giggles. "He's like a mountain."

"Mountain? Really, Taehyung?" you ask, giggling as Taehyung frowns at the way you're making fun of him.

"Yeah, I mean you should know that out of all people."

"Taehyung!" The three of you exclaim your friend's name, yours and Jungkook's face flushing at his bluntness, both embarrassed that he brought that exact topic.

And you spend the next hour laughing with your friends while they help you pack, Taehyung purposely hiding your stuff under the pillows or in random drawers to keep you there as long as he can. He's acting as if he's not going home soon too and as if he won't see you for a year. You're slightly annoyed at Taehyung's behavior, especially when you want to make it into Seoul before it gets too dark. You don't want Jungkook to drive late at night, even though the road is usually more calm at that time – but he deserves to spend his last day here instead of coming back late and then going home the next day.

But still, you're touched by Taehyung's determination to keep you here, finding his pout cute. You can't stay annoyed at him, no matter how many times you tell him to stop hiding your stuff all around the room.

When Jungkook and Jimin are helping you with your suitcase and bag, meanwhile Taehyung is sulking behind you, you're coming downstairs to inform everyone about your departure. Once Jungkook sets the suitcase down, he informs you he's about to talk to Kiko and tell her he's driving you home.

You're immediately ambushed by Maya and Namjoon, both of them surprised by your sudden decision and even though they don't say anything, you see understanding in their eyes as they hug you. Maya promises to get back to you once she'll be in Seoul, both of you promising to see each other to hang out. Even when she mentions that "no boys are allowed" Namjoon doesn't seem surprised a bit as he laughs at his girlfriend, but promises to see you soon too.

You thank Seokjin for letting you come on this trip and stay here, and even though he's not exactly your friend and there aren't that many times the two of you talked, he's friendly and warm.

"There's no need to thank me, I'm glad you joined us. Jungkook's friends are my friends too," he assures you, giving you a warm smile as you smile back in appreciation. "You can come here anytime you want and join us. I told Jungkook that too."

He doesn't question you about your sudden want to leave, but you do think he already gets a clue. Maybe he hasn't been involved in your own drama, but he's clearly not blind and his wife is literally Kiko's best friend. There's no way he's clueless about the drama that has been going on in his family's cabin.

You appreciate him not questioning you or giving you any weird and knowing looks.

As much as you feel slightly better after interacting with everyone and properly saying your goodbye, you still don't regret your decision of staying longer. You've got some unfinished business and the person behind the message that's sitting in your phone is the reason behind it.

Kiko and Hoseok are in the middle of preparing dinner when Jungkook finds them in the kitchen, Hoseok messily opening the back of seaweed causing some of it to drop on the floor.

"Jungkook, hey," Hoseok says enthusiastically, ignoring Kiko's stare as he purposely ignores it with a grin. "Did you come to help us?"

Kiko glances at Jungkook while putting out a cut board from one of the cupboards. They could use some help, especially when Hoseok has no idea what he's even doing in the kitchen. To be fair, he was the one who offered to help since most people cooked other days and he felt like he's not doing much. Plus, he learns fast and with Kiko knowing how to cook, he'd be at least able to help her. Unfortunately, it doesn't look that way right now since he managed to rip off the package causing an even bigger mess.

"Uhh, no actually," Jungkook answers, scratching the back of his neck before he gives the two of them a glance. "I'm actually about to drive Y/N home, I just came here to tell you that." His eyes stay on Kiko because even though Hoseok is present, he's mostly informing her about it.

"She's going home?" she asks, opening her mouth in surprise before she can stop herself. Her features are immediately twisted in guilt, something he and Hoseok notice right away but decide not to comment on. They share a look though, right before Jungkook turns to Kiko and walks closer to the kitchen island where she's standing on the opposite side of.

"Yeah," he simply answers, not wanting to say your reason or go into too much detail. It's not like none of them doesn't get the hint of why you could be possibly leaving. "I'll drive her home and then come back, so we can leave tomorrow. Does that still stand?"

"Yeah, sure!" Kiko says quickly, giving him a smile. "Don't you want to have dinner first? It won't be done in an hour but you'll probably come late."

"No, it's fine. I'll just eat when I come back," They both know he probably won't because he can be quite strict about his diet. Not necessarily in this season or right this time, but eating late at night has always been a no for Jungkook. The other thing is that he usually breaks that rule though.

She doesn't look convinced but decides not to comment on it, even though she wishes he would just eat before he spends an eight hour drive. Can't you go home tomorrow? Why do you've to go now? 

"Why is she leaving so sudden?" Kiko asks, voicing out her thoughts. She doesn't sound bitter, just curious and kind of confused. It doesn't make too much sense for you to be leaving in the afternoon. "I mean at this time." she clarifies, knowing the three of them probably knows the real reason why you've decided to leave.

"She told me earlier but me, Jimin and Taehyung talked to her for a moment and then we helped her pack her stuff. Taehyung wasn't making it easy," Jungkook chuckles, still finding it funny how Taehyung really wasn't making it easy for you and your annoyed expression and the glares you gave him were even more amusing.

Finally he wasn't the one being glared at by you, he was quite enjoying it.

"Jimin and Taehyung want to stay here, so I offered to drive her home." he shrugs, explaining as Kiko nods in understatement.

"Okay, um... do you think I can talk to her?" she asks carefully, nervously reaching for her ponytail to pull it tighter. "To apologize... I should apologize before she leaves."

He understands that... but he's not very pleased at the idea even though he knows it probably will be for the best. She wants to apologize and she has a reason for it. But he can't help but feel slightly tensed at the idea of Kiko trying to talk to you. He just doesn't want any confrontation or fights, not when everything is still fresh.

But like he said, it'll probably be for the best.

"I mean... you could try," Jungkook says lightly, "I'm not saying it'll go well but it's always good to try."

The most preferable way would be if you stayed here for more days, so you'll cool down and be more open about hearing her out. Hearing Kiko's apology. But since you're leaving, it's better if she just does it right now. There won't be a lot of opportunities for you two to meet again.

Kiko nods stiffly, letting out a shaky breath before she glances at Hoseok who gives her an encouraging smile in return. Jungkook takes her hand, doing the same thing as she offers him a nervous smile before they walk away from the kitchen.

You're in the middle of pushing away Taehyung who keeps you in a tight hold, being dramatic as always, giggling when he presses his cheek against yours. Jimin's bubbly laugh causes you to look at him, finding him taking photos of you and Taehyung.

"Hey!" you laugh, scolding Taehyung because his pressed cheek against yours makes your lips look puckered. You look ridiculous, feeling embarrassed but find the moment funny anyway.

Your and everyone else's laugh slowly dies down when you see someone else approaching you – that someone being Jungkook, Kiko and Hoseok. Taehyung's hold on you slowly loosen up once he notices them too, letting out an annoyed sigh when he sees Kiko but you don't have any specific reaction. Jungkook is already looking at you with pleading eyes, almost looking worried rather than pleading.

Your eyes drop to their intertwined fingers before you raise your brow at Jungkook, wondering what she is doing here. Did he call her? Did he tell her to say goodbye to you? Surely he isn't that stupid.

"Can I talk to you please?"

Kiko surprises you for speaking up first, clearly surprising Jungkook as well when he glances down at her with doe eyes. She nibbles on her bottom lip, gripping Jungkook's hand even tighter. She's nervous, that much is obvious and the sudden silence that surrounds you just puts even more attention to the interaction.

The beat of silence definitely doesn't help the awkwardness that starts creating in the air. It wakes you up from your stare, causing you to clear your throat as you try to look unphased by her courage. You do have to give her that, she has courage. You were ready to fight her which you're kind of embarrassed about to be honest. You still recognize that feeling of anger, knowing very well why you wanted to do it in the first place. But you don't want to end up being marked as a violent person, even though you don't regret lashing at her. Or at least trying to because if it weren't for Jungkook, who knows what would happen.

But you probably know that. You'd jump at her, letting that anger and hurt get the best of you.

Taehyung purses his lips, it's something you notice from the corner of your eyes, as he already stands up straight ready to say something smart in return. But before he can do that and earn glares from her boyfriend and best friend, you surprise him and yourself by saying:

"Okay," It's simple, yet effective.

Taehyung's head snaps at you, mouth dropped open. "Are you serious?" he whispers, Jimin uttering Taehyung's name through clenched teeth to warn him but Taehyung barely gives him a look before he looks back at you.

"Whatever she has to say... she won't hurt me." you tell Taehyung quietly, not wanting everyone to hear you.

"Not anymore." Taehyung retorts sarcastically, sending a glare to Kiko which makes Hoseok frown, fully noting the inhospitality in his eyes.

Jungkook sighs, giving Kiko an encouraging squeeze of his hands before he lets her go. Your eyes stay attached to Kiko, not fully recognizing what you're feeling. Is it hate? Even after everything that has happened, after she made you so angry to the point you were yelling at her and practically were ready to fight her, you're sure you don't feel hate. It's a strong word.

You've never truly hated her. You might've thought you hate her for hurting Jungkook's feelings, for breaking his heart when he never deserved it. Not when he has loved her so much. You've never seen someone love someone else this much. Some part of you is still sure you kind of hate her for doing that, but you know it's just that metaphorical hate instead of the real one where you couldn't stand her and wished her awful things.

You're so engrossed by your thoughts to notice Jungkook hinting to everyone to give you some space, not until you see Kiko slowly and cautiously approaching you when there's no one around.

Behind her, you notice Taehyung frowning in the distance at the interaction between you and her while Jimin keeps telling him something. Probably telling him to calm down because you're sure Taehyung is ready to interfere any minute.

"I'm not gonna bite," you mutter at her, rolling your eyes at the way she keeps playing with her fingers while staring at you with those annoying innocent eyes. Okay, maybe you're still angry. But you've never said you weren't so... 

She looks a little surprised by your sudden words, cheeks flushing for a second as she gives you a stiff nod.

"Are you gonna talk or what?" Oh, you don't mean to sound so cold and mean but you just can't help it. You can't control yourself. It annoys you how cautious she's acting around you – not that she doesn't have a reason for that – but well, you find it annoying anyway because it looks like you're the bitch here.

"I wanted to apologize to you," she starts and you don't quiver, expecting this to be the reason why she wanted to talk.

She probably feels too guilty, so she wants to apologize to make herself feel better about the whole thing and before you can leave. You wonder if Jungkook advised her to talk to her, he did go to find her to inform her about him driving you home. Maybe he told her something. It doesn't matter though, it's not important.

"I know my apology won't do anything, but I just want you to know that I'm very sorry. I don't expect you to forgive me, I know I screwed up badly and I wish I could take it back. I didn't mean to tell him, Y/N,"

You stare at her, voice cold at the mention of your name. She rarely says your name but then – she rarely speaks to you. You can't help it, she just makes you feel so irritated. She says your name as if you were on a friendly basis. But that's just you being bitter and petty once again. How else is she supposed to call you? You almost want to laugh at yourself, you're acting ridiculous.

"Jungkook was right, I didn't think. I should've considered that he might doesn't know about you and Jungkook,"

Jungkook said that? Well, it's not like you're shocked but you're touched by the gesture. He really was mad once you told him what happened. You don't think you've ever seen him being so mad at her. He literally grabbed her while storming out of the room.

"I should've considered that option. He did ask about you and Jungkook, but I just thought he's curious about my point of view. You guys are close and I know some people don't get it." Well, she is right about that but you just stare at him with a blunt look.

If Haneul kept asking about you and Jungkook, which to be fair is both surprising and expected at the same time, she should've considered that he doesn't know. But to be fair, you can't expect her to analyze every single thing about your relationship. It happened, you're not very fond of her and you're still angry that she set her mouth on loose, but something tells you she didn't do it on purpose.

You do feel slightly betrayed by Haneul, getting to know he asked about you and Jungkook when you simply explained your friendship to him. He told you he trusts you and maybe he did. Maybe he really just wanted to talk to Kiko about it since she's Jungkook's girlfriend. But no, you can't bring yourself to overthink this thing. It won't do any good and--

"What's done is done," you tell her, shrugging. "You had no right to tell him that. I don't go around people and tell them you cheated on Jungkook. No matter how many times I had the opportunity to do it, I didn't."

She winces when you mention the cheating part, the topic that Jungkook is very sensitive to this day and doesn't want to be reminded of it. You get that but still, it happened.

"I know and I appreciate that." she tells you, features twisting to a hurtful grimace as she suddenly looks away and takes a sharp breath.

You're not going to lie, she looks broken for some reason and you almost feel bad for her. And maybe you do because you suddenly get the urge to just let this conversation go.

"Thanks for apologizing," you mutter, clearing your throat as she looks up at you with hopeful eyes. "I'm still mad though." you inform her, not waiting for her response as you brush past her.

You walk straight towards Jungkook, his doe eyes already watching you with mere frowned and worried eyes. Undoubtedly, he watched your interaction from afar. He opens his mouth, probably voicing his thoughts, ready to question you about how it went but before he can do that, you're already cutting him off, silently telling him you just want to go home.

"Can we go, please?"

He closes his mouth, momentarily glancing at Kiko to check on her. She gives him a slight smile, his worries slightly drifting away before he looks at you and gives you a nod. Seokjin calls him over though, saying something about giving him keys just in case everyone will be asleep when he comes back. He won't come back that late but still, it's better for him to take the keys just in case.

"So, you're leaving huh?"

You don't hide your surprise at the sight of Hoseok approaching you, a small grin attached to his heart shaped lips.

"Thank your best friend for that," you blurt out, regretting it as soon as his grin drops and a frown settles on his face instead. Way to go, Y/N. "I didn't mean that." you add immediately, silently cursing at yourself once again.

You and Hoseok have been on good terms, ever since Jungkook got drunk and the two of you kind of talked. You remember hugging him to assure him everything between you two is in the past. Jungkook's drunk blubbering and him knocking on the car's window, telling Hoseok to not touch you is still one of the very remembered memories of Jungkook being drunk. He was so annoying back then.

Not that you weren't annoying while being drunk just last night. You didn't make it any easier for him.

You've come to the conclusion that Hoseok questioned you and Jungkook, quite justifiably because you dating was never a real thing, was just his way of being a best friend to Kiko. To see it from a different perspective is always different. If it was you and Jungkook, you know you'd act quite similar if not the same. He was protecting her, which you can't quite understand because she was the one who broke his heart. She was the one who cheated on Jungkook. Why the hell would he be so protective over her?

Maybe he's secretly in love with her. Even Jungkook wondered if he's the guy she cheated on him with. That would break his heart all over again. Hoseok is Jungkook's friend too.

"You did mean it," Hoseok says plainly, "You know, I don't agree with everything she's done. But she's not a bad person, I mean it."

"That's what every best friend would say." you point out, not really interested in him trying to persuade how Kiko is goody two shoes. Jungkook is doing a great job at that.

"Maybe, but I'm also honest with her. I've got her back because she's my best friend, doesn't mean I agree with everything she has done,"

You're surprised by the bluntness of his words. You wouldn't expect him to be so open with you all of a sudden.

"Isn't your friendship with Jungkook the same?"

It's like a slap to your face because he is right. And he knows that. Jungkook always has your back, no matter what. The same thing goes to you.

You were honest about him getting back to Kiko. You wanted him to see his own worth, protecting him just like any best friend would do. But at the end of the day, you've told him to follow his heart and if being with her again will make him happy, so be it. The decision has been solely up to him. The other thing is you, not being able to be friends with her, but you've talked about this to Jungkook.

Even though you showed and told Jungkook your opinion about her, you've always supported him and his decision. Especially after seeing him wanting her back so bad.

"I've everything, we can go," Jungkook's voice booms out a few meters away from you, his presence stopping beside you in seconds as he eyes you and Hoseok for a moment, a little frown decorating his face. "Everything okay?"

He sounds slightly cautious, maybe sensing the weird atmosphere between you and Hoseok even though you just stare at each other with unreadable gazes. Is everything okay? You're not interested in listening to how Kiko is not a bad person. She doesn't have to be, but people constantly reminding you as if you were the bad guy is getting on your nerves.

At the end of the day, you realize that Hoseok is her friend and sees things from another perspective, therefore your opinions and thoughts are different. You and Jungkook would most likely act the same, if it were you. But you're not in that position and you're not interested in trying to find an excuse for them or overly trying to understand them. Maybe you're selfish, but you've a right to have your own opinion based on your emotions and what happened.

"Yeah," Hoseok speaks up, voice cheerful all of a sudden while he responds to Jungkook, eyes staying on you. "I was just saying goodbye, sad to see you already leaving."

You're not sure if his words are even honest, it sounds to you almost as if he's purposely saying that. He was saying goodbye, but he certainly wasn't talking just about that. You both know that and he knows you won't say anything, his little smirk saying it all.

"Yeah, you really look sad." you mutter sarcastically, hearing Jungkook suck in breath as he grabs you by your shoulders, placing his palms there.

"Alright, bye Hobi hyung, we gotta go now." Jungkook chuckles almost nervously, turning you around in case you'd say something else.

You've a playful grin on your face when you turn your head to look at Jungkook, seeing him giving you an amused grin as he shakes his head at you. There is a scolding glint in his eyes but he doesn't comment on it, simply guiding you to your stuff where Jimin and Taehyung are already standing.

A few minutes later and you're still enveloped in Taehyung's arms as he clings to you like a little kid. Even Jimin's patience is running low when he calls him dramatic. Deep down you get a feeling Taehyung is doing it because he genuinely feels bad for you, knowing why you're feeling. He pities you because he knew how excited you were about this trip and now it's ruined for you.

So he acts like a little kid, hoping to at least distract you and make you laugh. But at the same time, this is Taehyung you're talking about and he does a lot of things that even he can explain.

"Okay, that's enough," Jungkook's patience runs low too when he sees the desperate look you give him. He takes matters into his own hands, separating you and Taehyung by grabbing your shoulders.

Taehyung pouts but lets you go, Jimin telling him to stop stalling you because you still have a long road ahead of you. For the last time, you wave at everyone and quickly walk out of the cabin with Jungkook to his car. He loads all of your stuff to his truck, ushering you to go sit into the car when you offer him your help. They're your bags anyway, but he just dismisses you and tells you to go into the car, saying you'll catch a cold.

He is right. It's freezing. It's cold even in the car but the air isn't as sharp as outside. You're met with a pleasant scent of leather seats and that typical scent Jungkook's car has when you finally sit down. Just as you're putting on your seatbelt, Jungkook joins you and ruffles his hair once he sits down, a couple of snowflakes slowly falling down his hair which makes you notice that it has started to snow.

He turns on the heating right away while turning on the engine, his hands being in an automatic mode as it's a second nature to him. You watch him, not understanding all those fancy buttons his car has even until this day, even though you like cars. It has so many functions, fancy functions, that made your head spin when Jungkook tried to explain everything to you when he showed you his new car.

As Jungkook puts his car into drive, driving out of its parking spot while you look outside, giving a last glance to the cabin before you make yourself more comfortable. There's still a light outside as snowflakes start to fall onto the windshield, Jungkook's turned on wipers wiping them away.

"You okay?" Jungkook speaks up, throwing you a quick glance before his eyes are on the road again.

He drives through the cabins, the same ones you admired when you first arrived here.

"Yeah," you answer, "I wonder if I should've stayed longer."

"I can still turn it around," Jungkook teases, chuckling when he sees your bulged out eyes and the panic in them. "I thought you wanna go home." he says more seriously, a genuine concern and curiosity laced with his voice.

"Yeah, I still want to," you assure him, "I just feel bad for you driving me this late."

"It's not even that late." Jungkook protests.

"You know what I mean," you roll your eyes playfully, "You'll come back late--"

"Ah," Jungkook groans, "Stop. Don't worry about me. I don't mind driving you home, I offered. I wouldn't have done that if I didn't wanna do it. Stop thinking of yourself as a burden. I can't believe we're having this conversation again."

He laughs but you know you must be annoying, you're just simply voicing out your thoughts. Your decision is not the smartest, not if you think about Jungkook and the fact he's the one who's driving you home when he's leaving tomorrow. It's not very practical when you think about it.

You let it go, enjoying the soft music that plays from the speaker while you both sit in silence admiring the beautiful snowy scenery around you.

"Hey, hey, you, you I don't like your girlfriend,No way, no way, I think you need a new one,"

One hour of ride already in and Jungkook is regretting letting you choose the music. He gives you a look with his brow raised, lips pursed in both amused and annoyed grin as you give him a sheepish look, stopping your singing.

"Do you want to tell me something?" he muses.

"Hm, I think you know," you smirk, "This wasn't on purpose though. I just played my old bops playlist and this song came on." you explain, chuckling at the ridiculous moment of this song playing.

It's true. Jungkook offered to pair your phone with his car, so you did. After singing a few of your favorite songs and having casual talks, you played one of your playlists that consists of older songs that you and Jungkook undoubtedly know. You had your fun singing Shakira, Rihanna, Chris Brown and Pitbull. They're a must-have in a playlist like this one.

"So..." he starts slowly, causing you to turn down the volume a bit as you stare at him curiously.

His eyes stay attached to the road, one hand gripping the steering wheel while the other one plays with his button lip. His hair is getting longer, some of it getting into his face but he doesn't seem to mind too much, softly pulling it away every now and then.

The grey colored sweatshirt, oversized again because he has grown attached to that style of clothing over the years, makes him look cozy with his sweatpants. It looks like a lazy outfit but he definitely rocks it and barely has put any effort in it. It's definitely a different choice of outfit than the one he was wearing yesterday, but you still can't help but let your eyes linger on him for a little longer before his voice snaps you out of your ogling.

"She talked to you?"

"You're asking me as if you didn't know already." you chuckle, scoffing a little as you look out of the window for a moment. You've been on a highway for a while now, Jungkook's car driving smoothly and quietly amongst the countless other cars.

"But what did she say though?" he asks, ears perking as you glance at him with confused and furrowed brows.

"You don't know? Weren't you the one who sent her?"

"What? No," Jungkook answers, frowning a little. "She wanted to talk to you. I didn't tell her anything."

"Oh," you let out, genuinely surprised by the information. "She apologized." you answer, not letting yourself to think about it too much because there's no reason.

"Oh... that's it?" He looks dumbfounded for a moment, tilting his head to the side.

"What else do you wanna hear? I'm still angry at her," you shrug, cursing at yourself for sounding cold.

He's just asking after all and you're becoming huffy all over again. Jungkook knows that because the only reaction he has to that is a sigh. It'd be easier if he said something, at least you wouldn't feel kind of bad for sounding so harsh. Harsh but honest, you're trying to tell yourself.

"I appreciate her apologizing, I think she really didn't mean to say anything to Haneul," you start unsurely, "But it doesn't change anything. I'm mad, she had no right to say that to him. But I also realize that her telling him didn't affect how he reacted to it, you know?" you ask, voice softening with each sentence.

Jungkook nods, letting you share your thoughts with him as he gives you a space to think about it.

"I am angry because she said something she shouldn't have. I was supposed to tell him, it's my relationship and also my responsibility to tell him. But when I think about when I talked to Haneul, her telling him was the least of his concerns. He didn't even care what she told him, he cared more about me not telling him."

"Well, yeah but you said you were planning on telling him. Which I absolutely understand. You shouldn't feel too bad about it, Y/N. You've known him for how long? A month? He can't possibly think he has the right to know every detail of your life because you started dating him,"

You know that, but it's nice to hear someone else say it and confirm your own opinion about it. It's that extra support you need and whether Jungkook is saying it because he knows this or not, doesn't matter.

"And this isn't just some random stuff about you. You need your time too and he should've respected that."

Nodding, you silently agree with him while staring out of the window. You're not sure what else to say. You know Jungkook is right but you still feel bad. It doesn't change anything about what happened between you and Haneul. You're not innocent in this, you're acknowledging that you're hurt him and it makes you feel bad and guilty too. You just wish he could understand you more. And then what he said... you're too shocked to even know what you really want from him. Do you want to be with someone who has treated you like that? It has made you see him in a different light.

Shocked. That's how you feel about Haneul because you'd have never guessed the guy that was so sweet and charmed you, would ever say something like that. Some part of you understands him, just a tiny part that knows he just said it out of hurt and anger. At least you hope it was like that. But the rest of you just want to slap him and get all angry when you replay his words.

"That's why I need to talk to him. To get closure, see what I'm feeling."

"Do you love him?"

You almost gasp at the straightforward question, not expecting him to ask you that when you've barely finished your sentence.

Love. Have you ever been truly in love? You wouldn't know. With Haechan, you were so sure you loved him until you both felt like your relationship wasn't going anywhere. After you both settled on a mutual break-up, with no hard feelings, it made a lot of things easier. You've realized it probably wasn't love. Some part of you loved him, but it wasn't that kind of love everyone is dying to experience. You're sure of it.

With Haneul, you like him. You really like him a lot. Or you liked him? Your feelings are all over the place at the moment but one thing you're sure about is that it isn't love yet.

"I think it's too soon for me to say if I love him or not," you decide to say, speaking out your thoughts while Jungkook listens attentively.

That makes sense. Can you really be all in love with someone you've known for a month? As much as he kept you happy and you were positive this relationship is stronger than the one you had with Haechan, you know it's too soon to talk about anything related to love. You've wanted to see where it brings you. You've had a good feeling about him, about your relationship. But now? You're not so sure.

"I think I'd be able to, sometime in the future. And now, after what happened between us, I'm not even sure if I'm capable of that."

"Yeah, that makes sense..." Jungkook murmurs, "Once you love someone, you'll know."

That makes you scoff. It must be a nice feeling to be in love with someone. Everyone is saying you'll know that feeling naturally but here you are, questioning yourself and your own feelings. Deep down you know you've probably haven't fallen in love yet.

However, there are people who genuinely just like each other. Are married, have kids together but they don't love each other. You don't want that.

Deep inside you're a hopeless romantic. You want to fall in love, have kids with that person, build your future together and grow old. The thought of getting divorced after years of marriage, especially when you've a responsibility in the form of kids or some financial responsibilities, scares you.

Most family members in your own family are divorced. Even your ex–classmates and friends you no longer hang out with had divorced parents. Everytime you think about it, you're hit with a reality knowing the percentage of failed marriages or just relationships in general is increasing.

"When did you know you're in love with her?" you ask, glancing at Jungkook whose brows swiftly shoot up for a moment. He wasn't ready for that kind of question.

You don't remember having a conversation with him about this specific topic. He had a mature relationship with someone before Kiko, but according to his words it wasn't anything too serious. Shortly said, it wasn't someone Jungkook pictured his future with. But then she came and Jungkook went completely crazy for her. He could talk about her for hours, constantly checking his phone in case she texted him back.

From that moment you knew she's different from any other girl Jungkook was dating.

"At first I was completely smitten by her," Jungkook says, chuckling a little, sounding somehow nervous as he recalls his feelings at the beginning.

You don't judge him for it. You might not be very fond of her, but Kiko is beautiful. She's exactly Jungkook's type, they are perfect for each other – visually, of course. When he first showed you her picture, cheeks slightly red and a giddy smile on his lips, you weren't surprised to see someone beautiful.

"Then I just remembered that I knew that I love her. Whenever I thought about her, whenever I was with her... it's hard to describe it. I think I realized how much I truly love her when we started talking about our future. It was no longer just a relationship that happened in the beginning. We started discussing future plans, I wanted her to move in... but you know about that,"

You nod, trying not to grimace. If she wasn't stupid and didn't cheat, she'd probably live with him by now.

"And I still love her. I still get those sparks... I sound stupid but I still get those sparks of love, you know? That's why I wanted to try and give her a second chance. She hurt me, she really did but I love her too much to just give up without trying. I was wondering how I'll feel once we get back together and I still feel the same. The same love I've felt for her from the beginning,"

Even the little disgust you're currently feeling at the thought of Kiko, realizing how lucky she is, you're not stupid not to notice the honesty and vulnerability in Jungkook's voice. You're not sure if he has been this open about anything to anyone else that isn't you.

But you love moments like these – when the two of you are having deep talks full of honesty, vulnerability.

"Not gonna lie... we did take a few steps back after... you know what. But if I ever doubt my feelings for her or how I feel about all of it, I wouldn't go to this length."

"But your relationship had to change, even a little bit."

"Of course, it did," Jungkook agrees, "I love her, she loves me but I'm being more careful and aware now. I didn't invite her to spend Christmas with me and my family, and not just even that but also a lot of other things. We communicate a lot, that helps too."

"Communicating, uhm..." you mutter, raising your brow at him which he quickly catches as he lets out an embarrassed chuckle.

"Yeah, communicating," he agrees, scrunching his nose a little knowing what you're insinuating. "But the sex is great too but if I'm being honest, we no longer go r--"

"Ew," you cut him off, faking a gagging sound as he starts laughing at you while your face is scrunched in pure disgust. "You're disgusting. The last thing I wanna hear is your sex life with her. Ew, what the fuck, Kook."

"What, I thought we're talking!" he defends through laughing as you let out another set of 'Ews'.

"You don't have to be that open and honest, Jeon." you snap, scrunching your nose again.

"Like you weren't fucking while I was on the phone." he scoffs, not hesitating even a bit as you choke on your spit.

"That was--that wasn't-- it's your fault!" you exclaim, feeling the heat in your cheeks at the reminder of that.

"How is that my fault?" he scoffs, emphasizing the 'my' part as he shakes his head.

"You were the one who constantly kept calling me. We both know you'd keep doing that until I pick up, you're annoying."

"Uhm, uhm... excuses, excuses," he snickers, "But I'm glad you finally admit it."

"Admit what?"

"That you were, indeed, having sex while I was on the phone. You were very determined that you weren't when I asked you about that." Looking at him, you see the way his lips twitch in an amusement causing you to groan at him.

"Who even asks a person about such a thing?" you exclaim, "You're the weird one here. You were confronting me about it."

"Oh come on, I was just teasing you," he groans, silently cackling while you roll your eyes at him and huff in your seat. "You made it more fun though, kept lying and getting all frustrated because I called you out for it."

"You're awful," you comment, crossing your arms over your chest as you huff again. "I know how you sound when you're getting fucked." You mimic his deep voice, your body naturally shivering when you remember his exact tone when he said that to you.

"Because I know and I had to prove it since you were denying it," he deadpans, shrugging as you gape at him quickly growing embarrassed. "I said what I said."

"That's not what you say to your best friend." you argue, biting your lower lip as you stare at his hand instead of his face, eyes attached to his tattoos to distract yourself.

"You also don't fuck your best friend," he points out back, his name falling out of your mouth immediately as he chuckles. "Oh yeah, fuck, mhmmm-- that's hard to forget, sorry."

Your jaw falls to the floor, your eyes bulging out when you hear Jungkook mimicking your moans. "I don't sound like that!" you argue, slapping his arm but not hard knowing he's driving and it barely does anything, just makes him laugh even more at the distress in your voice.

Your cheeks burn, actually your whole body burns from embarrassment and maybe a little excitement too – which you'd rather not admit. You hate how much effect those memories with him have on you.

"Yeah, you do," he smirks, biting his lower lip as he cockily smirks at the road, purposely knowing you're seeing it anyway. "Nothing to be embarrassed about though."

"Okay, let's not talk about that," you quickly dismiss him, waving him off. "Fuck, I'll need a shot from this conversation when I get home."

Deep chuckle resounds in the car as you breathe out, fanning your face a little. "Didn't you say you're not going to drink for another couple of months?" Jungkook teases you, earning a side glare from you.

"That was before this conversation happened," you snap, "Not one shot, I need to get drunk."

Jungkook knows you're just joking, mainly being dramatic and he can't help but find you amusing. This is his specialty, teasing you and annoying you to the point you get all frustrated.

"Okay, but I'm not dealing with your drunk and brat ass again."

You feign a dramatic gasp, palm stretched on your chest as Jungkook looks serious, although you notice his lips twitching slightly. "I admit, I was kinda bad... but I apologized." You give him a crooked smile which he quickly looks at, shaking his head amusingly at you.

"Yeah, and I told you it's okay but I'd rather not repeat that any time soon." he jokes, not wanting you to get offended but you don't.

You know he's right, you really gave him a hard time yesterday and you kind of paid for it the next morning. You don't think your hangover has ever been that bad before. And you still feel bad. But surprisingly, he managed to take care of you even in your drunk and annoying state. As you replay the memories from last night, you're certain you were incredibly annoying and you wonder how the hell Jungkook put up with you.

You were acting stupid and you're embarrassed about a lot of things that night, one of them making you chuckle when you replay it. It feels like it hasn't happened but you know it did.

"What?" Jungkook breathes out a light chuckle, glancing at you when he hears you chuckle under your breath.

"No, nothing."

"Oh come on, don't do that." he whines, pouting a little as you roll your eyes and sigh.

"Fine," you tell him, his ears perking up as he attentively listens. "I just can't believe you spanked me. So embarrassing."

You're a little embarrassed to be so straightforward about this, especially when the two of you have a history that includes spanking. You don't want him to think it turned you on or something, you knew it wasn't meant like that. You're simply finding that moment funny, considering it was the only thing that helped.

"It was the only way to shut you up," he offers teasingly, "Glad it worked." he adds, poking a tongue into the inside of his cheek cockily as you flush even more.

Fuck, how long until you're home?

[sunflowersinthedirt]

GOLDEN SLUMBERS | PAUL MCCARTNEY

fluff and angst, very needy reader! mentions of weed, cigarettes and alcohol. also mentions of beatles get back/let it be period.

1969!paul mcbeardy.

again, sorry for any typos. english is not my first language and gifs are not mine.

- X -

I was freezing when I decided to go to bed. I drank wine, but not as much as when I'm in Paul's company. It's night, and even with alcohol, Martha, and a fireplace, nothing seemed to warm me up. Maybe I missed Paul.

It had been a couple of days since he slept with me. Get Back and Twickenham were taking up a lot of his time. He seemed grumpy when he got home, but always took some time to cuddle with me as if the external problems that working with his band for the past 18 months were causing. Martha had become my biggest companion in this house, following me wherever I went.

When I got into that bathtub, I didn't think I was that sleepy. I dozed off lightly, and when I felt the water getting cold, I decided to get up, dry off, and go to bed. Martha had been sleeping in her bed for ages. There were some beds scattered around the house for her to rest, as she was a very calm dog. I put on one of Paul's shirts to feel like he was there with me... I had no idea what time he'd be back and he hadn't confirmed anything with me. I inhaled his scent embedded there and turned to the empty side of the bed.

It didn't take long for me to fall asleep. I didn't know if it was the alcohol, the tiredness, the longing... I just know I fell asleep. But it wasn't light sleep, as I woke up every half hour to turn over. Until I felt a chaste kiss on my lips but no weight on the other side of the bed like I wanted. Paul had arrived but hadn't lain down. I could hear his footsteps on the stairs followed by the jingling of Martha's paws. I was alone in that room and it left me feeling colder and longing for their company.

Wrapped in a blanket, I went downstairs feeling small and fragile. I didn't care that the king-size blanket I was wrapped in was dragging on the cold floor.

I heard the sound of piano notes in the living room, something between C Major and a murmuring voice. Paul rarely came home from work and continued working. It wasn't difficult, but Paul didn't like to bring work home. I thought he might be stressed enough not to lie down or not be sleepy.

I approached the piano, saw his figure with downcast eyes, long lashes brushing his cheeks. Paul hummed quietly, noticed my presence, and stopped playing, focusing his attention on me.

"Did I wake you, love?" he asked in an affectionate tone. His tired eyes opened wider.

"No," I replied sleepily, coming closer to him.

"Sit here." He tapped his left leg and made room for me to sit on his lap.

I sat, wrapped in that blanket. Paul adjusted his arms to give him mobility to play the piano keys in front of him, and I hugged him around the waist, snuggling against his larger body.

"S' Much better this way..." he said, his accent strong and drawling, his voice low and husky. I could feel the vibration of his voice and hear his heartbeats. I rested my chin on his shoulder, and he stole a kiss from me. His now-full beard tickled my cupid's bow.

This was what was missing. I felt so relaxed in his company. Paul continued to play the piano.

"Couldn't sleep?" I asked, my eyes were almost closing again.

"No, love. I came home with a melody pounding in my head." He answered, still playing the piano. He smelled of tobacco and herbs. He had been smoking more than usual, and I knew he was stressed. "I'm sorry for bringing work home. I don't have the lyrics yet, but the melody got stuck in my head because I played it at Twickenham before coming here. I was the last to leave the studio today."

"I'd never be upset with you for that. Y’know." I rubbed my face against his beard. "Can you show me the melody?" I asked, sleepy. Martha was already snoring at our feet.

Paul kissed my forehead and continued playing the piano, murmuring some words. I struggled to keep my eyes open.

"Once there was a way..." he sang softly, playing the piano with his leg rocking me to sleep. He was making up these lyrics, or I didn't have such a sharp taste in lullabies like that. "To get back homeward." He repeated the sung sentence, my eyes closing slowly. I felt like a child again. Paul warming the chilly room, the blanket wrapping us like a cloak. "Sleep, pretty darling, do not cry... And I will sing a lullaby."

It didn't take long for me to fall asleep there in his lap, listening to him humming that song. I felt at home and knew I was home.

"Sleep well, princess," he whispered, and suddenly I couldn't hear the musical notes he had played earlier on that piano.

- X -

i’ll take requests soon!

[shares-a-vest]

@steddielovemonth Day 8: Love is... The heartbeat I can feel when I hug him (Prompt by anon)

wc: 535 | Rated: T | cw: Hospital setting, mild descriptions of injuries, scars and bandages

Tags: Post Season 4, Eddie Lives, Hurt/Comfort, Physical Injury

I’m Taking You Home Now

Eddie swings his legs over the side of the hospital and plants his sock-covered feet almost to the ground for what is hopefully the final time.

He knows Wayne and Steve are picking him up today. He knows they have packed his things – that a fresh, comfortable and new set of clothes is sitting on the hospital chair in front of him.

It’s the same chair Wayne, Dustin, Jeff and Steve have each alternated between them for the better part of two months while he has been stuck in Hawkins General. He also knows that said chair is uncomfortable, causing Wayne’s hip to stiffen up with every visit – one that makes Steve grumble and say that his back is ‘fine’.

Eddie knows that he is going home today, to a sorta-new trailer in a relocated park.

He just can’t believe the day has finally come, is all.

Nor can he believe that actual Good Dude Steve Harrington is walking in to collect him, all smiles. Just for him.

“You ready?” he beams.

“Yeah,” Eddie nods, frowning and balling his fists on the stiff mattress.

His feet are only barely touching the ground. The bed is still too high up, positioned the same as it has been since he first woke up a good week and a half after Spring Break.

His body still aches all over and he’s got more than a bandage (or five), plus a few more stitches to deal with at later dates.

But he’s intact. Put back together.

Alive.

Steve sets a bag down, one that looks just like the bag of delicious food and treats Henderson’s mom always brought in and shared around.

“Let me help,” he says, coming to stand right in front of him.

“Just…” Eddie trails off, settling back down, “Give me a minute.”

“Okay,” Steve says, his voice soft and soon Eddie feels delicate fingers brushing his bangs into position.

He probably looks a sight – knows that a decent chunk of his hair on the left side has been shaved off to make way for a scar he just can’t find all that metal despite what his friends say.

Eddie leans into Steve’s touch as he listens to him explain, “No hurry. Wayne has a bunch of paperwork to sign, anyway.”

He nods and begins snaking his arm around Steve’s middle. It takes a lot of effort when it comes to his left arm, but Eddie eventually manages to get both around Steve. He interlocks his fingers together, the weakened muscle strain now relieved as he rests his elbows (and a little too much body weight) on Steve’s hips.

Steve shuffles closer and Eddie uses what little strength he has to squeeze him tight – even if it’s only for a moment.

It’s good enough, he thinks. Might even be close perfect.

Like this, even with his barely recovering body, a less-than-romantic setting and a somewhat not entirely aligned angle, Eddie is warmed by the feeling of Steve’s heartbeat, strong and thumping in his chest against his own scarred cheek.

Steve shifts and Eddie soon feels a kiss being pressed to the top of his head.

“I’m taking you home now.”

Thump, thump.

[clarisse0o]

Camp Wiegman-Part 62

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe : Military School

Words : 5K

Masterlist

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Friday, February 26; 9:00 AM - Zoo.

"Come on, hurry up," my brother urges next to the car.

"Joan," I tease. "Stop it, please, and stay here."

"If you don't listen, we'll turn back," Lucy scolds him.

That threat earns a grumpy response from my brother. He turns his back on us, crossing his arms. I smile, keeping an eye on him in case he seriously considers walking away. Meanwhile, Lucy grabs our backpack, which we prepared last night while Joan was already asleep. Since we couldn't go yesterday, we rescheduled the zoo for today. Joan was over the moon once he figured it out. We didn’t talk about it at all yesterday. We were too busy. We ended up at a small fair with our friends after visiting the local market. My brother had completely forgotten about the zoo because of that, and in the evening, when he asked, we pretended we weren't going anymore to surprise him. It worked quite well. He's very excited now. I hope today will be better than the fair. We came home late, in the late afternoon. We offered to have our friends stay for the evening, but they politely declined, likely feeling awkward about being invited again. Perhaps it was for the best. Joan was so exhausted that he fell asleep right after dinner. We managed to get him to sleep in the guest room thanks to that. Sure, he woke up at the crack of dawn this morning and squeezed in between us, but we couldn't hold it against him. At least we almost got an entire night to ourselves. Joan sulked all morning, but it seems like his bad mood has vanished. Now he’s beaming with anticipation.

"Alright, we’re good to go," Lucy announces, shutting the trunk.

Joan spins around excitedly at the news. His smile brightens, and he looks at me, waiting for my go-ahead.

"Go ahead, but stay in front of us, okay? I don't want to lose you in the crowd."

He nods and takes the lead. I smile, following him with my hand in Lucy's. Lucy sighs softly, probably relieved that we’ve finally arrived. Joan was unbearable the whole ride. I've seen him impatient before, but never like this. It felt like he was deliberately trying to annoy Lucy, and he succeeded. I had to keep him entertained, or else Lucy would have lost her mind.

"I hope today goes smoothly," she says.

"There’s no reason it shouldn’t. Though, there are more people here than I expected," I remark. "I didn't think it’d be this busy."

"It's Friday, the last day of school vacation before the weekend. Of course, it’s packed," Lucy replies. "At least the weather is warming up a bit. It’ll be more pleasant."

I nod. It’s still a bit chilly, but unlike what one of Lucy’s neighbors told us earlier this week, the icy wind has finally died down. The snow has also melted, and in a few weeks, the temperature should finally rise. I can’t wait for that. In Barcelona, we rarely experience bad weather, if ever. It’s the complete opposite here. It’ll be tough at first, but I think I can get used to it. There are perks to the snow and cold. First, you can have fun in different ways, and with the cold, you get way more cuddles. Not that we don’t cuddle in Barcelona, but it’s much more enjoyable here, under a blanket. We reach the ticket booths. We wait a bit before it’s our turn. I handle the tickets, not giving Lucy a chance to argue. It’s about time she lets me contribute financially, even though I’m not working yet.

"I could have paid," she says once we pass the security gates.

"No," I reply cheerfully.

"Yes."

"No, and that’s the end of it. Today, it’s on me."

She rolls her eyes with a small smile before Joan reminds us of his presence by tugging on my jacket sleeve.

"Come on, Ona! We need to keep moving!"

"The animals aren’t going anywhere, you know," I say with a small laugh. "Come on, give me your hand. There are a lot of people here."

"I'm not a little kid anymore," she complains.

"That’s not the point. I just said there’s a crowd, and I don’t want to lose you."

I accompany my words with a stern look. He’s been arguing nonstop since we got here, and I’m starting to lose patience. He sighs and eventually gives me his hand. In the meantime, I turn toward Lucy, but I notice she’s no longer beside me. A brief moment of panic sets in until I spot her at a nearby map stand. I sigh in relief before dragging us over to her.

"Hey, if I tell Joan to give me his hand so I don’t lose him, it’s not an excuse for you to run off."

She laughs softly, leaning her head toward me.

"Sorry. I saw the maps and thought they might be useful."

"Haven’t you done the zoo before?" I ask, surprised.

"No. It’s a first for both of us," she says with a little smile.

I return her smile. She finally takes a map and stops when she sees my hand extended toward her. She laughs but takes it without protest.

"Alright, let’s go."

"What should we start with?" Joan asks, looking around with excitement gleaming in his eyes.

"Well, let’s check the map."

As I speak, Lucy unfolds the map. Everything is super organized. They’ve laid it out by zones based on the animals’ origins. My attention lingers on the penguins. Knowing Joan, that’s what he’ll enjoy the most.

"I’d save that for last," I say, pointing to that part of the map.

"Okay, well, let’s start here then," she points to the opposite direction.

"Should we join a tour group?" I ask, noticing one gathering beside us with a guide.

"No, that’s boring," my brother groans.

"Looks like you’ve got your answer," Lucy says.

"Alright, alright," I reply with amusement. "Just us, then."

"Can we start with the lions?" he asks.

"That’s actually over that way. Let’s go."

We move forward through the crowd to start with the African animals. Joan might be excited, but so am I. I love these kinds of outings, just the three of us. I also love animals. We linger at some exhibits and pass by others more quickly. It’s our first time here, but the layout is really well done. I’m sure we’ll come back, just Lucy and me. The zoo is organized like small villages at various points along the path. They’re often animated by staff, and they even offer activities in certain spots. We managed to get Joan to participate in one of them. He didn’t really want to at first, but in the end, he seemed to enjoy it. Then, we had the chance to feed the zebras. We were lucky to arrive at the right time. That was definitely Joan’s favorite part. Of course, the activity was supervised by staff, but they weren’t obligated to involve the visitors. The African section ends with the lions, which he kept talking about the entire time, even after all the things he got to do. I mentally note that my brother is becoming more and more spoiled and that I need to talk to our mom about it. I’m not the one responsible for his upbringing, but it’d be good for her to keep an eye on this not-so-pleasant change.

"What’s the next section?" I take advantage of my brother’s distraction to ask Lucy.

"The Asian animals. Then the Australian ones. But I think it’d be a good idea to grab lunch before that since we’ll be near a restaurant."

"Okay, that works for me," I reply with a smile.

We’ve been walking for two hours now, so that sounds like a good idea. By the time we finish the next section, I imagine we’ll be ready for lunch just before noon. It seems less busy than the one we just completed, according to the map. That’s good news, considering the crowd around us. Lucy was right earlier. The weather is mild, and it’s the end of vacation, so people are making the most of it. We’ll have to consider these factors next time if we want a more peaceful visit. Lucy kisses me and then wraps her arm around my shoulders. I keep an eye on my brother, who’s been ahead of us for a while now. He’s captivated by the lions. He’s holding onto the railing, looking down as if he never wants to leave this spot. Unfortunately, I have to burst his bubble if we want to see everything.

"Come on, Jo, let’s go."

"A little longer, please," she pleads, pouting.

"No, we’re moving on," Lucy jumps in. "Otherwise, you won’t be able to see everything. There are other animals like leopards and jaguars."

"Tigers too?" she asks excitedly.

"Of course. We’re getting to them soon, but we need to keep moving. »

Finally, without further resistance, he complied. He walked ahead of us. From the start, he had been negotiating to stop holding my hand. It must have been torture for her to see the other children running around while he couldn't. I agreed on the condition that he stayed in front, didn't run, and didn't stray too far. I also didn’t want to spend my day holding his back. So far, he had respected my terms, which was a first since this morning. Lucy had gotten so fed up with his behavior in certain situations that she left him to me to handle. She was probably right. I had noticed that the more Lucy got involved, the worse his behavior became. I imagine it will take some time for him to adjust to having someone else in my life. After all, he had never really seen me with anyone before. When I was with Mapi, he was too young to remember, which was for the best. He would probably have made a fuss about us no longer being together, given how much he adores my best friend.

With these thoughts in mind, we continued along, taking our time to observe everything. The scenery was beautiful, a peaceful place where you almost forget the disrespectful kids shouting everywhere. Almost. Lucy might complain, but at least we didn't have to deal with that with my brother. As someone who dislikes drawing attention, I appreciated this.

Finally, it was time to eat. As planned, we arrived just before noon. There was a bit of a wait, but not as bad as it could have been.  

“I’m not hungry,” my brother mumbled. “Do we have to stop?”

“Yes,” I replied. “You’re not alone, and knowing you, you'll be hungry as soon as we leave.”

“But there’s still so much to see!”

“And we’ll have time to see it all.”

“But—"

“Joan, that’s enough,” my girlfriend interjected with a stern look. “My threat from this morning still stands.”

“Oh, stop. He’s been good all morning.”

Lucy raised an eyebrow at me, and I pressed my lips together. Last night, she’d told me it would be a good idea to support her when she said something to Joan, to avoid making her look like the bad guy. Admittedly, apart from a few grumpy remarks, which I had managed so far, Joan had behaved well this morning. My girlfriend sighed softly and turned back to Joan.

“We’re eating now. If you’re not hungry, you don’t have to eat, but don’t complain later.”

In response, my brother groaned, crossing his arms and puffing out his cheeks. It seemed like his favorite thing to do since he arrived, and it was pretty funny to watch.

“Come on, move along,” I guided him with a hand on his head as we advanced in line.

“But I’m really not hungry,” he insisted, looking up at me. “My stomach hurts,” he added, rubbing his belly.

“Really?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

He nodded, eyes filling with tears. I sighed and glanced at Lucy, who shrugged. I knew she was aware, just like me, that this was probably a lie.

“Well, I suppose you can take some medicine beforehand. We brought those dissolvable sachets, just in case.”

In reality, we only had tablets. I would have crushed one if she truly needed it, as he can’t swallow them whole. It’s not like I don’t know how to do that. I also knew he hated it, which was clear when he grimaced at the idea.

“No!” he whined.

“Well, what? You’re feeling unwell, aren’t you?”

“I-I think I feel better now.”

A small laugh escaped me. I shook my head. So the negotiations were working after all. Lucy wasn’t wrong to have me handle this. It seemed effective. We finally reached the buffet, which reminded me a lot of a school cafeteria. I grabbed a tray for Joan and myself, while Lucy took care of hers. We helped ourselves to the food. Lucy and I got chicken cutlets with fries and a green salad, while Joan chose spaghetti Bolognese. For dessert, we picked cookies. I think I also slipped a few snacks into the bag in case we got hungry later. We finished with drinks—iced tea for Joan and me, and water for Lucy. Once everything was ready, I paid, and we found a table. The place was somewhat crowded but not so much that we had to wait for a table to free up.

The meal passed peacefully, with Joan chattering nonstop. It was the first time he’d talked so much, so we let him. He had just started his first year of primary school, and since I no longer lived at home, the change was pretty drastic. Not just in personality, but intellectually as well. This morning, he had fun reading all the signs to me, showing that he could read now.

“And then Paul got a new dog. It’s so cute! I wanted to go to his house to see it, but Mom wouldn’t let me.”

“Really?”

“Mm-hmm,” she nodded with her mouth full. “I wanted to have a sleepover, but we already had plans that day.”

“I see,” I chuckled. “Maybe next time.”

“When are you guys going to get a dog?”

Lucy, who had been silent until now, nearly choked. I stifled a laugh. That question caught me off guard too. I’d forgotten how unfiltered Joan could be. If anything, he talks more now than before.

“Why do you think we’d get a dog?” I asked, once I composed myself.

“Well, I already asked Mom, but she said no. So now I’m asking you guys. It’d be great! I could take care of it when I visit.”

This time, I laughed out loud. It wasn’t like he would be spending half the year with us. Besides, knowing him, even if we had a dog, he wouldn’t actually take care of it when he was here.

“We’re not getting a dog, Jo, I’m sorry.”

“But why?” she pouted.

“Well, we’re hardly ever home right now. It just wouldn’t work.”

"Home." The word slipped out before I realized it. It didn’t seem to bother Lucy, though, as she kept watching us with a faint smile. I cleared my throat and continued, giving a more realistic explanation that Joan could understand.

“Don’t you think a dog would be miserable, locked up in an apartment all alone? And dogs require care, which we wouldn’t be around to give since we don’t live in the apartment during the week.”

“Or on weekends when you don’t have leave,” Lucy teased, continuing to eat as if nothing happened.

I stuck my tongue out at her in response. She had said that on purpose. The worst part was that she was the one who enforced this “punishment.” It was funny, though, and I appreciated that she still saw me as the person I was before we got together. It meant she hadn’t labeled our relationship or changed how she viewed me. Now that I think about it, our behavior toward each other hadn’t changed either. Joan’s voice brought my attention back to her.

“But yeah, not now, duh! You could get a dog once you’ve finished school and have a house. You said you love Lucy, so that’s what will happen, right? You could have a dog then, and you wouldn’t even need a baby!”

Lucy burst into laughter—literally. Meanwhile, I died of embarrassment, hiding my flushed face behind my hands. I couldn’t believe he had the nerve to say that in front of my girlfriend. I could feel Lucy’s eyes on me from across the table, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at her. I forced myself to, though, and saw her smiling at me with amusement, clearly expecting me to respond.

“You’re really talking nonsense. We don’t know yet. And who says we won’t have a baby, huh?”

“Well, I’m already here. You don’t need one. And besides, you can’t have one anyway. I’ll just move in with you.”

Once again, Lucy snickered softly. Joan, who seemed very sure of what he was saying, pouted and crossed his arms. I bit my lip to hold back my amusement. He was definitely giving me plenty of stories to remind him of later.

“All that, huh?” I asked.

“Isn’t it a good idea?”

He was sulking. I recognized the tone in his voice when he did that.

“Where did you get all these ideas, huh?”

“Well, my friends say two girls together can’t have a baby.”

I ran a hand through my hair. He must have talked to them about me. I knew he often mentioned me to them, so it wasn’t impossible. Poor thing must have a lot of questions if he’s already discussing this with his friends—or anyone else, for that matter. It must be tough for him to understand everything at his age. I couldn’t wait for him to grow up, if only to understand this better.

“They’re right,” Lucy said. “But there are other ways.”

“That’s true,” I confirmed. “Like adoption, for example.”

I gave him the simplest version of the truth, something he could grasp. Lucy and I hadn’t had the chance to talk about it yet; it was way too early for that. But if I were to give my opinion, adoption wasn’t something I’d want to prioritize. Joan seemed to latch onto the idea instantly, and his reaction caught me off guard.

“Then you can adopt me!”

I rolled my eyes playfully and grabbed a napkin to wipe the tomato sauce covering his face. A few more seconds, and it would have dripped onto his clothes.

“And why would we adopt you, huh? You have a home with two parents. Adoption is for children who don’t have that, you know?”

I can see through his eyes that all the hopes he had thought so much about have evaporated. I don't like seeing that glimmer. I feel bad for him.

“So, you don't want me?”  

“We didn’t say that,” Lucy responds. “You can come see us as often as you want, and we’ll visit you in Barcelona too.”  

“But… I want to stay with you! You’re way too far from home, and Mom and Dad aren’t around much anyway.”  

I give him a sad smile. I know what that’s like, unfortunately. I run my hand through his hair before pulling him into a hug. He lets himself go without any fuss.

“I know, sweetheart, but we can’t do any better. It’s not that we don’t want you, but you can’t just leave home like that. Besides, Lucy and I will probably have another busy year ahead. Even if we wanted to, we couldn’t take you in permanently.”

I think about the opportunity at the Art school for me and the opening of the gym for Lucy. This upcoming year will be just as busy and complicated as this one, if not more. I dread it as much as I’m excited to see what the future holds. I’m still waiting on a phone call, and I’m starting to worry that I haven’t heard back yet. Lucy says it’s normal, and I hope she’s right.

“Hmm… I would have preferred to live with you anyway,” he admits.  

I don’t know what’s going on at home, but there’s clearly something wrong. I think I’ll call my mom when I get the chance. If Joan isn’t feeling comfortable there anymore, I need to know so I can get my mom to react. There’s no way I’ll let him go through what I went through. I know how that ends, and if we don’t find the right person to help, things can go very wrong.

“Alright,” Lucy interrupts. “We should finish up quickly if we still want to do everything.”

This news brings a small smile to my brother’s face before he quickly resumes where he left off before our conversation.

“Slow down, please. Otherwise, you’ll really get a stomach ache.”

He nods but doesn’t slow down, which makes Lucy and me laugh as we exchange a glance. She may not have said much at the table, but I know she heard everything. I’ll ask her what she thinks about it all when we’re alone. We finish dessert, then head off to explore another area. Even though Joan claimed he wasn’t hungry, he still ate well. The day goes on, and surprisingly, Joan has become calmer than before, which delights my girlfriend. It’s understandable. As much as he pushes her limits, it’s annoying to have to constantly put him back in his place when we’re supposed to be having a good time. He must have realized that his tantrums don’t work with us. Maybe I should call Sofia as well to see how she reacts to his. Unlike my mom, I don’t doubt Lucy knows how to manage him as I do. It’s just that my mom doesn’t have patience for this sort of thing, so it’s very hard for her to react calmly. She loses her temper rather than defuse the situation.

“Hey,” Lucy calls out after a while. “Stop worrying. It can’t be that bad.”

“I don’t know,” I admit with a small, anxious smile. “We’ll see. I’ll call my mom tonight. I need to know what’s going on.”

She nods understandingly before giving me a soft kiss. Unfortunately, it’s the moment Joan turns around. His new habit is to let out disgusted noises whenever he sees us. But it seems he didn’t hear the rest. We change the subject as we finish this park, which Joan seems particularly fond of. It’s true—it’s very well done. We’ll definitely come back.

Friday, February 26th; 9:00 PM – Lucy’s apartment.

We’re back home. Everything is peaceful. It was six o'clock when we got back. The day was good. We all enjoyed it, especially Joan, who has already showered, eaten, and even gone to bed. He fell asleep in the guest room without even protesting. In fact, he went there on his own with his new penguin plush. We managed to finish the park, and it seems I was right—Joan loved it, and I couldn’t resist buying him a plush when he asked for it. He earned it with how well he behaved in the afternoon. As for Lucy and me, I had just settled on the couch with Netflix on in the background. I had already showered, and Lucy should be joining me soon. I hadn’t heard the water running in the bathroom for about five minutes. Now that everything is calm, I wanted to call my mom. Joan’s behavior wasn’t normal. I knew he had behavioral issues, but now we needed to figure out why. Nothing ever happens for no reason. It seems like everyone’s already forgotten what happened with me. I’m not going to let them forget. Just as I was about to call, an unknown number appeared on my screen. I don’t recognize it, but it seems to be from here, from Manchester. I frown, intrigued by the late call. Could it be Feli? Would she really come here? How would she even know where I am? The thought makes my stomach knot. I inhale slowly, glancing behind me to check if Lucy is around. Not yet. She’s still in the bathroom. After the fifth ring, I force myself to pick up.

“Hello?” I answer cautiously, my voice uncertain.

“Miss Batlle?” a voice asks.

“Yes...?”

“Hello, this is Bennett Fields! I’m sorry to call so late. I lost track of time,” he says with a small laugh. “Am I disturbing you?”

Bennett Fields, Bennett Fields... Oh! He’s the gallery director. I immediately sit up straighter on the couch, as if he could see me from afar.

“No, no! I’m at home,” I tell him.

“Good.”

If he were in front of me, I’m sure I’d be able to see his smile. It’s amazing how you can read him so well.

“How are you?”  

“Well, I’m pretty nervous now that you’re on the line,” I admit, which makes him chuckle. “And you?”

“I’m well, thank you. I apologize for not contacting you sooner. I had a rather busy week. I know I said I would get in touch with the person who sent me your drawings, but I preferred to speak with you directly.”

“No problem.”

In any case, I would’ve gotten the answer tonight since the other person is also in this apartment. I now understand why he asked for my number at the end of our meeting. He seems to like dealing with people directly, which is completely normal.

“I’m calling to follow up on our meeting.”

“I figured,” I reply with amusement.

I like the way we talk. I should be stressed, but he puts me at ease. His laugh is contagious.

“You impressed me a lot, Ona. Certainly not by your lack of experience, but by your undeniable talent.”

Blushing, I feel flattered to hear that from a professional.

“So, here’s the thing. I have a proposal for you. Of course, as we discussed, it would mean going back to school. Are you still okay with that?”

“Of course!”

We haven’t discussed next year much with Lucy yet, but we both kind of know what to expect.

“Good. However, the offer wouldn’t be for the Manchester gallery…”

“What do you mean?” I ask, feeling a bit worried.

“Well, here’s the thing. My gallery is expanding. I’m developing new locations in the region. I’m about to open one in Cardiff, and I’m putting together a team. I think you’d be a great fit there, under the direction of my new manager.”

Cardiff? The news leaves me speechless. What should I say to that? I definitely can’t accept such an offer on the spot. My lack of response prompts him to speak.

“I know it’s a big decision to think about. You’ve already traveled a lot, but this would be an excellent opportunity for you.”

“It definitely requires some thought…” I murmur.

“I didn’t expect an immediate answer. I’ll give you time to think it over. Just so you know, there’s also an Art school there, and the program can last two to three years, depending on the student’s choice.”

Two to three years? My vision blurs. There’s no way I’m staying away from Lucy for that long!

“If you’d like, we can schedule another meeting in two weeks. Do you think you could get some time off from school for a weekday meeting?”

“I-I’ll have to check.”

“Well, call me when you know. That way, we can set up a time to meet and talk face-to-face. Can we do that?”

“Yes, we can do that. I’ll call you then.”

“Great! Well, I wish you a good evening. Talk to you soon.”

“Talk to you soon, Mr. Fields.”

I hang up, completely overwhelmed by the conversation. Damn it! I think I’d have preferred if he’d just rejected me rather than making me face such a decision!

“Who was it?”

I jump, not having noticed Lucy’s presence. I turn toward her as she slowly approaches to sit beside me.

“Ona?” she calls gently. “Is everything alright?”

“I think we need to talk…”

Concern flashes across her eyes. Oh yes, she has reason to be worried. If she only knew how I’m feeling inside right now... I almost feel like crying.

[arc852]

Stuck Epilogue

Warnings: Mention of feeling helpless/trapped, mention of past fear and panic

Word Count: 1376

Part 1 | AO3 Link

I wanted to give Jimmy and Joel some more comfort and I've been writing a lot of angst lately, so I figured some fluff was in order! I hope you guys enjoy!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 Jimmy woke up slowly, shifting slightly as he opened his eyes. He didn’t remember falling asleep last night. The previous day's events must have made him more tired than he thought. He yawned and snuggled deeper into the surface he was on, not wanting to get up quite yet. There was a steady, rhythmic beat underneath him and Jimmy opened his eyes again to see that he had fallen asleep on Joel’s chest.

 He noticed a gentle pressure against his back and Jimmy turned his head to see Joel’s hand, covering him and acting like a blanket. Jimmy turned back forward and looked up, seeing the underside of Joel’s chin. He appeared to still be asleep.

 This was not the first time Jimmy had fallen asleep on one of his humans. He had done it a few times before with both Joel and Grian. Jimmy would never admit it but it was his favorite way to sleep. Not only did he enjoy being close to them but he felt the safest there. It was easy falling asleep when he knew nothing could happen to him.

 Jimmy smiled a bit, enjoying it while Joel was still asleep. But then he began to think back to last night, to getting stuck in that glue trap. He shivered, that helpless feeling overwhelming him once more at just the memory. 

 Before he could think too much more about it though, Joel started to stir. A low groan escaping his lips. The hand on him curled around him a bit more, acting as a protective shield as Joel continued to wake up. Jimmy didn’t say or do anything, just let his mind focus on watching Joel wake up. It was a good distraction from the memories of the previous day.

 Joel opened his eyes and they immediately glanced down at Jimmy. Jimmy blinked at him and Joel closed his eyes again with another small groan. “...Morning.” Joel said, stretching his free arm. 

 “Morning.” Jimmy replied back. Joel yawned, turning his head away as he did so. He blinked his eyes open again, this time keeping them open, and pulled himself up a bit so he was now sitting up. The hand around him applied just enough pressure to keep him pressed against Joel’s chest so that he didn’t slide down and fall.

 “We must have fallen asleep during the movie last night.” Joel said, noticing the laptop still open at the end of the bed. Of course, the screen was black now, having lost power hours ago. “Not surprising though, considering…well.” Joel stopped himself from saying anything more. He looked down at Jimmy and maneuvered him gently so he was fully cupped in his hand and then moved said hand away from his chest to get a proper look at him. “Are you…doing okay?”

 Jimmy simply shrugged. Not really feeling like getting into it very much. “Better.” Not a lie. “Just…kind of trying to ignore it.”

 Joel hummed. He couldn’t blame Jimmy for that. “I’m gonna talk to my parents about it today.” Joel said once again. “It’s never going to happen again.” Joel was confident in that statement, leaving no room to argue.

 Jimmy believed Joel, it was hard not to when his tone was that sure. He knew Joel would protect him, especially now that he knew about those sorts of dangers. “I know.” Jimmy said, a small smile tugging on his lips. His smile fell a moment later though. “We don’t have to worry about the dorms. I’ve never seen any sorts of traps set up in them.” Jimmy said, thinking to mention that to ease Joel’s mind a bit. It had been so long since Jimmy had to worry about traps that he had almost forgotten that they were something he had to worry about. 

 “That’s…good.” Joel said, though Jimmy isn’t sure why he said it like that.

 “Joel?” Jimmy asked and Joel sighed.

 “It’s just…you shouldn’t have had to worry about it here either.” He looked away, eyes downcast. “My place was supposed to be safe. You were supposed to be safe here.”

 Jimmy felt guilt crawling through his gut despite having no reason to. “I am safe here.” Jimmy said, trying to reassure Joel. Trying to reassure himself. “I didn’t…I’m fine now, right? You got me out of that thing and now we’re here and I’m okay.” His words were for himself as much as they were for Joel.

 “Still…you shouldn’t have had to go through that. I can’t even imagine…” Joel trailed off, shaking his head. 

 “It was the most fear and panic I’ve felt in a long time.” Jimmy revealed despite himself. Joel’s eyes snapped back to Jimmy, wide with surprise. “Since…you know.” Since meeting Joel and Grian for the first time. The words were left unsaid but both still heard it. “But even then…I knew you would get me out of there. There was no doubt in my mind about that.”

 Joel swallowed and Jimmy couldn’t help but watch the small lump go down Joel’s throat. It was hard to meet Joel’s eyes right now, with him being so open and vulnerable about everything. “Well…I’m glad I could.” Joel said quietly.

 Jimmy nodded and they both fell silent. Joel’s thumb came over to him and lightly nudged his side and then moved over to press gently against Jimmy’s chest. It was reminiscent of their first meeting, though a lot less overwhelming now. Since then, Joel liked to do this, in order to feel his heart beat. Joel never said anything about it, but Jimmy suspected it was to bring Joel some comfort, in knowing that Jimmy was okay. Jimmy’s long since seen the gesture as comforting himself.

 After a few moments, Joel removed his thumb and broke the silence. “I say we spend the day in bed today. I can’t be bothered to get up and move around.” Joel said, his voice teetering back toward normalcy, a bit more booming, a bit more Joel. Jimmy found comfort in the fact that Joel was acting how he normally would.

 “I mean, it’s your vacation.” Jimmy said with a shrug and a small smile. Joel looked down and smiled back. “You do what you want.”

 “It’s our vacation Jim.” Joel said. “But yeah, I think I will.” He sunk back into bed and held Jimmy closer to him, bringing his other hand up to cup both of them around the borrower. “And I’m dragging you into it because otherwise I would be bored.”

 Jimmy rolled his eyes. “Right, of course.” He chuckled and leaned into the warmth of Joel’s hands. “...Thanks.”

 Joel simply smiled, a softer one this time and Jimmy knew Joel got what he meant by it. “Wanna watch some youtube videos on my phone?” Joel asked, since the laptop was a bust for now. 

 “Just as long as it’s Mumbo Jumbo we’re watching.” Jimmy said with a grin, as Joel turned to his side and set Jimmy down on the bed in front of him. Jimmy sat and leaned back against Joel’s chest, looking up at him as Joel reached over and grabbed his phone off the nightstand.

 “Of course.” Joel said with a roll of his eyes. “But we’re definitely watching some of those miniature cooking videos after.” Those kinds of videos had started off as a way to tease Jimmy, and they still were, but it was also really cool to watch too.

 “Ugh, fine.” Jimmy said, pretending to be annoyed but he enjoyed those videos too.

 Joel smiled and pressed on the newest Mumbo video before holding it out in front of both him and Jimmy, settling in to watch for the next few hours at least. As the first few minutes played, Joel’s free hand came up next to Jimmy, not touching him, just being close. Jimmy was the one who moved even closer, leaning against the hand before turning his attention back to the video.

 Though Jimmy still felt the unease of helplessness at the thought of what happened yesterday, it no longer threatened to overwhelm him. He was okay. He was here. And with Joel, he was safer than he had ever been.

 He was going to be okay. And he knew that for certain.

[keigosstarlight]

Pairing: Dabi x GN!Reader

Warnings: NSFW/18+, kidnapping, captive darling, noncon & dubcon, BJ, head pushing/guiding, mind break(?) (reader is sympathetic after a bit), praise & degradation, calling reader "pet," reader calls Dabi "Touya," burning, punishments.

Wordcount: <1000 (700+)

Summary: A.U. where Dabi kidnaps you after he's killed Endeavor.

A/N: This is the first fanfic that I've ever shared. 🫣 I also don't write a lot anymore, so I'm hoping it's decent enough. This was originally a fem reader, but I wanted to be more inclusive, so apologies if I missed anything! I read this like eight times, but shit happens. My brain is fried and I wrote this in like an hour.

You resisted when Dabi kidnapped you, but after that first night when he punished you, you decided it wasn’t worth it. He had fucked you senseless, face buried the mattress as your tears stained the sheets. The fading burn on your hip is a constant reminder how he held you despite your pleas, the stinging sensation of the flesh now numb in your memories since your brain forcibly detached. The events are fuzzy at best and completely hidden at worst.

Besides, he treats you well enough, rewarding your obedience with some new clothes that you were sure were more for his eyes than your own happiness, your own toiletries, and a cute little collar with a “T” on it. Of course, if he takes you anywhere, they have to know you belong to someone. He even gave you your own bedroom to retreat to. Sure, he barged in sometimes and invited himself to your bed, but his heat was a comfort now. When you woke up to his palm pressed to your stomach as he held you close, it was almost enough to make you forget.

Every day, you watched the news with him while they replayed his video, time and time again. You heard the details of how his father abandoned him, that his father only married his mother for what her quirk could provide - every single day. After so long of hearing about that abuse, of seeing the anger in his face every time the number one hero showed up, one day you felt you couldn’t be mad at him anymore. Despite Endeavor being dead now, it wasn’t enough to soothe that fire in his heart. You felt sympathy for his broken childhood.

You hated it, and yet, for some reason, the way he looks at you makes your heart skip today.

"Why are you looking at me like that, Touya?"

Dabi gives a teasing smirk, his gaze still glued to your body as he replies, "Because I can, sweetheart. Is there an issue?"

"No." 

You’re so confused, but you can’t deny how badly you want him. You fight the urge to move closer, but as hard as you wrestle with it, you give in, scooting inch by inch closer to him on the sofa until your hand comes to rest on his cheek. Your thighs brush together, the warmth is all so familiar.

"I've missed your touch, Touya."

Surprise flashes in his eyes at the affection, but this is what he’s wanted since he claimed you, so he's not questioning a damn thing.

"Good pet, I knew you'd like it." he praises with a smile.

He caresses your cheek as he looks at you with a lustful grin, his touch becoming more daring as he slides his other hand to your inner thigh.

"Now, I want you to make me feel good, and I think you know how."

Your breath hitches as you bite your lip anxiously, but your response is immediate.

"Yes, Touya."

The verbal obedience is enough to make his dick twitch, but when your hands come to help him undo his belt and pants, that's when he knows he’s got you right where he wants you; completely and utterly his - body, mind, and soul. There was no need for restraints, no need for force, to manipulate your body how he wanted. As much as he loved having that power over you, hearing you choke on his cock while you rested your pretty hand on his thigh instead of pushing away screaming was so much better. 

Muffled noises of your pleasure vibrate around his dick as he toys with your nipples, earning a hum of approval from your captor. Your sweet tongue swirling around the head of his cock makes his eyes roll back. He places a hand to the back of your head, gently guiding you up and down as he lets out sighs of bliss. His attention is locked on you while you take every inch of him, pubes tickling your face, his scent filling your nose as you gag for a moment before he lets you back up.

"Good fuckin' pet." He grunts, head rolled back on the couch’s back.

He fucks your mouth at a steady pace, hips thrusting upwards as your mouth slides over him. Once, twice, three times, he spurts down your throat and you swallow every drop of the salty cum with a slight cringe. Though you’re much more willing now, it doesn't make the taste any better. You wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, shifting on your knees as you look up at him panting softly as you catch your breath. His eyes flutter, his palm reaching to caress your cheek, a smirk coming over his face.

“So obedient, so submissive. You finally know your place.”

[thenextdawn-temporarilyclosed]

Bad Feeling

Word count: 1.8K

Summary: you have a bad feeling when your girlfriend’s working and you’ll act upon it, however it didn’t go as planned

Warnings: angsttt

Pairing: Jenna Ortega X Fem!Reader

Starting with the Angsttt👀 hope you like this! 🤍✨

———

It had been almost 3 years since you had been together with your girlfriend, Jenna. You were always with her wherever she went because being the cuddly girl she was she never wanted to get separated from you for too much time. That’s why wherever she went to film movies, she always asked an extra place for you. Everyone knew you by now, her family, her managers, her casting crew and you even got to meet the other actors she would act with. You had even gained a little following. You weren’t an actress, well you actually weren’t famous. You were just a normal girl who happened to be Jenna’s girlfriend, but people loved you two as a couple, so since the first time Jenna tagged you on her instagram stories, people started following you on social medias and tagging you two on edits or even on fanarts. You had to admit you didn’t mind that.

However with that came also a lot of responsibilities. You were starting to get recognized in public even when you were out on your own and let’s not talk about paparazzis taking pictures of you, following you home. Luckily you didn’t yet live with Jenna. You wanted to live with her but it meant leaving her no privacy at all, this is why when she wasn’t filming you’d talk through phone calls or video calls, catching up when you went with her on filming locations. This was one of those times, you had gone to Romania with her on set of “Wednesday” because she had to film her new series. There you met Tim Burton (you fangirled a lot over his movies and it was a pleasure for you to meet him) and also managed fo make friends with the other actors.

They were all around your age, so most of the times even if Jenna’d finish filming late at night you’d spend time with them, talking outside someone’s trailer or when it was colder you would just get inside and talk about everything, play cards or table games, you always had things to do, and of course there was also your alone time with your girlfriend. Luckily the time on sets was longer then the times off set so you’d see her a lot actually. When you had alone time you would help her revise her scripts, watch movies together, cuddle and even go further than that. You loved each other so much, and both of you could swear on your parents’s life that you would never find someone better than each other.

That day you woke up with a really bad feeling, well actually you had spent your whole night awake because of it. You knew something would happen, you were sure of it and when you had bad feelings, they would always come true. You were also sure that this bad feeling was about your girlfriend, so you just felt the need to be with her and protect her if anything happened. Soon Jenna’s morning alarm rang and she turned it off before turning around in your arms as she stretched “mhmmm I don’t wanna get up…” she mumbled with her eyes still closed as she snuggled up to you, hands on your chest and you gently caressed her cheeks. “Good morning my beautiful princess” you said and watched her both smile and blush, moving in closer as she hid her face in the crook of your neck giggling.

“Don’t call me that!” She said shyly and you kissed her head with a smile. You two stayed like that for a while, cuddling in silence until you spoke up. “Babe I know I probably can’t, but can I come on set with you today?” You asked, Jenna pulled back and looked at you. Eyes swollen from the sleep, she seemed confused. “You never asked me that… I think you can but why?” She asked as she caressed your cheeks, enjoying the morning cuddles. “I have a bad feeling, I feel like something bad is going to happen to you and I want to be there to stop that from happening.” You looked down. You already had these episodes, and Jenna always made you go with her, even though nothing actually happened.

“If that makes you feel more secure then yes honey of course you can, I could never deny you that” she said and you smiled, somewhat sighing in relief as you nodded and pulled her in for a sweet sleepy kiss. “Thank you honey, now come on get up so we can head to set” you said and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before both of you got up and headed to hair and makeup and then going on set. You two had some time together before filming started. “You know, you look so cute in these braids” you said and played with her hair “don’t touch them! Tim spent a lot of time doing them how he likes… I promise I’ll let you play with my hair when we get back to our trailer” you smiled and nodded at her words, kissing her cheek as you hugged her from behind, waiting for all the equipment to be ready. She looked so small in those oversized clothes.

Then Jenna started filming. It was one of the scenes inside Weems’s office. It was the place with most equipment, for some reason which you came to the conclusion to be because of the different angles the scenes were filmed at. You had to admit you loved the atmosphere that was there on sets, it was so interesting to see how all the equipment worked. Though while you checked all of the stuff around you noticed that one of the structures built in to hold the cameras was failing right on top your girlfriend. You tried to make the crew notice, but they were too busy with filming that they didn’t notice you. You hoped she would move from her position soon, but it didn’t seem like she would anytime soon.

“Shit shit shit-“ you thought to yourself as you stared at the equipment. You couldn’t just let it fall on her head, and just as the last nail keeping it up failed, you jumped in where she was and pushed her away as the equipment broke and fell on you. It took Jenna a while to get up from where she had hit the ground, but when she did she saw a terrible scene happening in front of her. “ (Y/N)! OH MY GOD-“ she ran to where you were supposed to be, there was nowhere she could see your body, except for your hand. They obviously stopped recording and tried getting you out of there, but the equipment was far too heavy to move on their own. Jenna started crying and yelling. “(Y/N)! (Y/N) Can you hear me? Please please answer me!” She then moved to the crew “AND YOU GUYS FUCKING DO SOMETHING! SHE COULD DIE UNDER THERE!” At that they tried again, to no use.

Jenna reached for your hand and as she did she heard you cry weakly “Baby can you hear me? Please please be okay-“ she said the last part mostly to herself as you gently squeezed her hand “J-Jen it hurts- I c-can’t breathe-“ you cried out in pain under the remains of the equipment. In the meantime someone had called an ambulance and you could hear it from a distance “don’t worry baby- you’ll be okay.. someone called an ambulance, just please stay with me” she said, trying to reassure you but eventually she felt you lose your grip. She began to cry more and beg for the cast mates to get the heavy pieces off of you. The ambulance soon arrived and took you to the hospital, and as much as Jenna insisted to go with you the crew didn’t let her. She had to continue filming.

However she couldn’t. She tried filming different scenes but she was too distracted, she was constantly thinking of you, if you were okay, if you were in danger, and she couldn’t help but think about the fact that you told her this morning that you had a bad feeling. It could have been her. At some point she even wanted to be her instead of you but seeing how you didn’t hesitate in jumping in front of death for you, made her realize how much she loved you and how much you loved her. The crew mates and the director though saw how Jenna was distracted so he let her go for the day, and she immediately asked to be brought to the hospital.

The other cast mates, having gotten close to you, decided to go with Jenna, one because they cared about you, two because they wanted to comfort Jenna. As soon as they arrived at the hospital and went looking for you, they were met by your doctor who explained them everything, and also told them that your life was not in danger but also that you had a chest and a head trauma so you were now resting and had a mask to help with the oxygen. Jenna couldn’t help but just be glad you were okay as she got in your room. She sat down in the visitors chair and took your hand as she cried slightly waiting for you to wake up. Emma, Percy, and Hunter there as well as they were the ones you bonded more with.

Eventually after a while you did wake up and immediately squeezed your girlfriend’s hand, who looked at you with tears in her eyes. “(Y/N)? Babe are you awake?” She asked you, having noticed your eyelids flatter as you softly smiled at her and tried to sit up, only to stop when you felt pain in your chest. “No no don’t try to sit up” she said and gently pushed you to lay back down, caressing your cheek. “Are you okay?” She asked, a tear rolling down her cheek as you wiped it away with your hand. You nodded at her question. “Geez you scared me a lot! You are so crazy at times (Y/N)!” She sighed out of relief “wow I save your life and this is the thank you I get?” You replied jokingly and watched her smile and shake her head. “Don’t do that ever again!” She said as she gently nudged your side.

“I promise baby. But next time I have a bad feeling, we’re staying home.”

[atomicladytimetravel]

Desperate Housewife

Sequel to Hot for Teacher but can be read stand alone.

Summary: You’re constantly desperate for Joel’s touch, so you visit his office in the middle of the day. No outbreak au and Sarah is not mentioned. No use of y/n.

F masturbation, some sexting, sir!kink, cockwarming, creampie, breeding kink, semi-public sex.

If you’ve ever seen Two and a Half Men, I pictured Joel’s assistant as the housekeeper, Berta, while I was writing her.

Word count: 3,214

You woke up slowly, your eyes fluttering open and adjusting to the sunlight filtering into the room. You stretched and reveled in the feeling of the plush sheets against your skin. You reached over to your nightstand and grabbed your phone to see what time it was - 10:17 am. You sighed happily. Ever since quitting your job and becoming Mrs. Miller, you’d been really living your best life. At first, you felt bad and refused to let Joel spoil you; it didn’t take long for him to change your mind. Now you lived like a princess and you loved it.

You settled back against the pillows and checked your notifications. You had a message waiting for you from Joel.

[8:05 AM] Joel: Good morning baby girl 😘 I hope you slept well. Had a good time this morning 😉 might have to do it again when I get home.

You smiled, remembering the quickie Joel had woken you up with earlier. The memory of him groaning in your ear as he pumped you full of cum aroused you all over again.

[10:21 AM] You: Morning babe 😘 might have to be sooner, I’m horny again. Come home for lunch?

[10:22 AM] Joel: Fuck princess…as much as I’d love to I’m swamped over here. Get your toy and make yourself feel good baby. Then I’ll take care of you when I get home.

You pouted at his message. Sure, the toy would feel good but nothing compared to Joel. You’d been insatiable the last few days though, so you decided to use the toy and hoped it would satisfy your need until Joel got home. You threw the covers back and opened the drawer on your nightstand to retrieve the rose shaped vibrator Joel bought you to use in his absence. You opened the camera on your phone and switched it to video, deciding to tease your husband a little.

You bunched your blush pink satin nightie around your waist and pulled the neckline down so that your tits spilled out over it. You started the video and panned the camera over your body to where your fingers were playing in the cum Joel left between your legs.

“Mmm, I wish you were here to fill me up again,” you pouted into the camera. “I love having your cum in me.”

You sent him the video and hoped he would see it soon. This would be a lot more fun if he was playing along. You smirked when you saw the video said “read 10:43”.

[10:44 AM] Joel: Good girls don’t pout. I already filled you up once today, but I guess my little cum slut needs more huh.

Oh god. Nothing turned you on more than when he talked to you like that. You clicked the button on the vibrator and put it to your clit. You let out a sigh as pleasure jolted through your body. You took a short video of your breathy moans as the vibrator sucked at your clit and sent it in response. You let yourself enjoy the sensation of the vibrator until your phone vibrated with another message.

[10:49 AM] Joel: [Video Attached] Baby girl you’re gonna be the death of me…

You eagerly clicked on the video. You hit play and saw Joel palming his hard on through his work slacks. You could see the outline of his hard cock and it made your mouth water.

“Don’t know what I’m gonna do with you princess. Told ya I was busy but you keep sending me dirty videos anyway. Got my cock fucking rock hard.” His voice was low, almost a whisper. Pleasure coiled in your stomach as you played the video again. You started another video and turned the speed up on the vibrator. You didn’t mean to moan as loud as you did but the new speed felt so good on your clit.

“I can’t help it. I need you so bad. This feels good but your cock would feel so much better.”

You sent the clip with a warning for him to turn his sound down. He responded with a sound clip.

“God damn baby, you’re a needy little thing lately. Make your pussy cum baby, I know you need it. Fuck, I’m so hard right now. Wish I was there to fill up that pretty pink pussy and give my baby what she needs. Send me a video when you cum princess. I wanna see what I do to ya.”

You listened to the message over and over until you were on the edge. You turned your camera on once more and turned the speed up on your vibrator again.

“Fuck, fuck, Joel I’m cumming,” you panted. You left the vibrator on your clit for as long as you could, prolonging your orgasm until your legs twitched. You sent the video and lay there panting as you awaited Joel’s response.

[11:07 AM] Joel: God fucking damn it baby. You’re so pretty. Show me your pussy.

You giggled. He ran a multi-million dollar construction business but you could make him drop everything for a glimpse of your pussy. You spread your pussy lips and took a picture of your glistening center. You sent it to Joel and he read it as soon as it delivered.

[11:09 AM] Joel: Fuck, some of my cum is still leaking from that desperate pussy. You got me wettin my boxers like a fuckin teenager.

[11:10 AM] You: You sure you can’t come home? ☹️

[11:15 AM] Joel: As much as I’d love to come home and bury myself in that pussy, I’ve got a lot of work to do. Be a good girl and don’t touch yourself anymore until I get home.

[11:15 AM] You: Fiiiiine.

[11:16 AM] Joel: Atta girl. I’ll take care of you later, don’t worry. Greedy thing.

[11:16 AM] You: You love it.

[11:20 AM] Joel: I do. And I love you ❤️

[11:21 AM] You: Love you more 😘

You did a few things around the house to distract yourself from the dull throb between your legs. After making sure the house was spotless, you checked the time. You groaned upon the realization that it was only 2:00. It would still be at least three hours before Joel came home. You simply were not going to make it that long.

You threw on a sundress and a tiny g-string, forgoing a bra, and drove yourself to Joel’s office. Several of his employees greeted you when you walked through the front door. You’d known most of them for years and considered them friends. Your favorite was Angie, Joel’s assistant. She was an older woman with no filter and zero fucks to give. She was also a lesbian who flirted with you shamelessly in front of her boss just to get a rise out of him.

“Hey Angie! Is Joel in his office?” you asked as you approached her desk.

“Hey hot stuff! Yeah, he’s been locked in there all day, grumpy as fuck. I’ll tell him you’re here.” She pressed a button on the phone to her right. “Joel, you’ve got a visitor.”

“Take a message, Angie, I have to get this shit done.” His voice was strained and frustrated.

“Okay, I’ll just tell your pretty little wife she can hang out with me then,” she replied, shooting you a wink. There was silence on Joel’s end, then his door opened up a few seconds later.

“You keep your hands off my wife, Angie,” he joked as he ushered you inside. After he closed and locked the door, he pulled you into a hug and smirked down at you.

“I’m pretty sure I already know the answer - but what are you doing here baby?”

“I need you,” you whispered, looking up at him through your lashes. He tutted and shook his head.

“Couldn’t wait for me to get home huh? So needy. What if I said no?”

“You won’t. You’re already half hard.” You palmed his cock over his pants and felt it twitch in your hand.

“Hard not to be when you’ve got a hot little slut wife that wants to fuck all the time.” He reached under your dress and squeezed your ass cheek.

“How can I not when you make me feel so good?” You were kissing his neck and undoing his tie. “My pussy can’t get enough.”

“God, I love you,” he grinned.

Preparation was hardly necessary. Not only were you still wet from making yourself cum, but new arousal was dampening the clean panties you’d just put on. He led you to his desk and you watched as he unbuckled his belt and undid his slacks. He let them pool around his ankles before sitting in his chair. He stroked himself a couple of times before motioning you to him.

“Sit on it,” he instructed. “But don’t move.”

“Babyyyyy,” you pouted. He shook his head.

“Ten minutes. That’s your punishment for not waiting for me to get home like I told you to.”

You huffed in reply, but did as you were told. You turned so that your back was to him and he reached under your dress to pull your g-string to the side.

“That’s it, good girl,” he whispered in your ear as you sank down on him. He moved his chair closer to the desk. “Now just sit still while I finish this email. If you make it the whole ten minutes without moving, I’ll let you cum. If not, you can wait for me to get home. Understand?”

You whimpered in response, already in desperate need to feel him move.

“You’re a big girl, use your words,” he reminded you sternly.

“Yes sir, I understand,” you said.

“There ya go, good girl.” He pecked your cheek. You needed to cum badly, so you were as still as you could be. He rested his chin on your shoulder and his arms caged you in as he typed up an email. He placed little kisses to your neck and shoulder as he typed. It hadn’t even been five minutes when he hit send.

“You’re doing so good baby,” he praised as his left arm snaked around your waist. “Just a few more minutes.”

He read a few emails and his free hand teased your nipples over your dress. He used his middle finger to just barely circle your nipple before gently pinching it between his fingers. You were going absolutely insane. You were so full of him and you just wanted to move your hips so bad. Quiet, needy whimpers fell off your lips.

“I know baby, I know,” Joel soothed. “We’re almost there.”

When the ten minutes was up, Joel put his hand between your legs and touched your aching clit.

“You did such a good job baby,” he said in your ear. He started rubbing in circles and your head fell back onto his shoulder.

“Yeah that feels good, doesn’t it pretty baby?” he murmured in your ear.

“Yes sir,” you nodded.

“I know it does. Don’t know what’s gotten into you lately that you can’t wait to be touched.”

“I don’t know baby. I just need you so bad,” you whined.

“Shhh, you’ve got me sweet girl. I’m so deep in that little pussy right now.”

“Can I move?” you asked desperately.

“Turn around first,” he replied. “I wanna see your pretty face.”

You stood up and turned to face him before dropping back down on his cock.

“Fuck,” he grunted. “Always so tight for me. Take what you need sweet thing.”

You began bouncing on him immediately. He put his hands on your hips to help you stay steady.

“Oh god that feels good,” you moaned quietly.

“Yeah? That needy pussy finally getting some relief?” he pouted, mocking your neediness.

“Yes sir,” you breathed. He reached up and pulled at the neckline of your dress so that your tits spilled out; they bounced in rhythm with your movements.

“God damn, I love watching your tits bounce in my face,” he groaned. He put one in his mouth and sucked. You pursed your lips to keep from making any loud sounds and you let out a breath through your nose. You rocked your hips faster, desperately chasing your release. His hands moved to your ass and squeezed roughly.

“That’s it, take it,” he said through gritted teeth. “Take what you want baby. Make my pretty pussy cum.”

You buried your face in his neck and he held you close to him as you bounced faster on his cock. You could feel the beginnings of your orgasm as he brushed your g-spot.

“Right there,” you panted into his skin. “Gonna make me cum.”

“Go ahead baby, let go. I know you need it princess.”

“Yes baby, I’m right there,” you whispered. He thrust up into you once and you came instantly, muffling your moans into his shoulder. He held you down on his cock as the orgasm wracked your body.

“I bet that felt so good, huh?” he asked, smoothing his hand over your hair. “You wanna give me another?”

“Fuuuck, yes sir,” you agreed, nodding your head. He stood the two of you up and sat you on the edge of his desk without ever slipping out of you. He put one hand on the small of your back to steady you while the other rubbed your clit slowly. He wasted no time pounding into you.

“I’m gonna fill up this little pussy,” he promised. “Wanna make you a mama so bad.”

“Oh god yes Joel,” you hummed. “Give me a baby.”

“Yeah? You wanna have my babies pretty mama?” he smiled.

“Fuck yes, put a baby in me,” you moaned. “I’m gonna cum so fucking hard.”

“Me too baby,” he groaned. “Gonna fill you up so nice.”

You hooked your ankles around his back as he thrust into you fast and hard. You kissed him as another orgasm ripped through your body.

“I’m cumming baby,” you whispered against his lips. “Fuck, I’m cumming s-so hard.”

“Me too baby, here it comes,” he grunted. He made a strangled sound as he came forcefully inside you. He went still and held you tightly to his body. “Ohhh fuuuck, I’m pumping so much cum into your pussy. God damn.”

He stayed inside you for a few moments after he was finished, catching his breath. He pulled out slowly and his load instantly started leaking out.

“Jesus, I don’t know how I still had that much,” he marveled. He smiled proudly. “Be careful walking out of here.”

“I’ll do my best,” you laughed. “Thank you baby.”

“Anything for you princess,” he said, kissing you softly. You hopped off his desk and adjusted your tiny thong, wishing you had gone for something with a little more coverage now that you were stuffed full of cum.

“I guess I better let you get back to work. I’ll see you at home honey.” You gave him a lingering kiss.

“Okay baby, enjoy your day,” he smiled. He gave you a pat on the ass as you walked out.

“Bye Angie,” you giggled innocently as you passed her desk.

“Hey, wait,” she called. You turned and she gestured for you to come to her.

“You’ve got something…coming down your leg,” she whispered as you got close to her.

“Oh my god!!” you exclaimed in a hushed tone. She reached across her desk and pulled a tissue from its box and handed it to you.

“I’m so mortified,” you said as you wiped your leg. She laughed.

“You think I don’t know what was going on in there? I was born at night, but not last night.”

You slapped your hand over your face and your cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

“Oh god, I’m sorry Angie,” you apologized. She just laughed and shrugged.

“I don’t care what he does, he owns this joint.”

“Fair point.” It was your turn to laugh. She leaned close to you and lowered her voice.

“Have you considered taking a pregnancy test? This is the fourth time this week you’ve come over here in the middle of the day for a play date.”

“Huh…,” you mulled over the thought for a moment. “I actually hadn’t thought of that. I guess I’m about to go find out! Don’t say anything to Joel.”

“Mum’s the word,” she promised.

“Thanks Angie! I’ll see you later.”

On your way home, you stopped by the drugstore and bought a box of pregnancy tests, choosing the one that had a rapid test and a digital test so you could be sure before you told Joel. You took the rapid test as soon as you got home and to your delight, it was positive. After drinking a lot of water, you took the digital test about an hour later. You burst into tears when it flashed “positive” across the display screen. You stashed the tests in the drawer of the coffee table in the living room and waited impatiently for Joel to get home.

He was slightly later than usual, but you really only had yourself to blame for that. You were waiting for him on the couch when he walked in.

“Hey baby,” he smiled. He leaned over the back of the couch to kiss you. You patted the seat next to you.

“C’mere, I’ve got to tell you a funny story.”

“Okay, lay it on me,” he said, taking a seat next to you.

“You might not think it’s funny at first but it gets good at the end,” you warned.

“Oh lord…okay, go ahead.”

“So I did my best to be careful leaving your office, but gravity was working against me. Angie stopped me and let me know I had something coming down my leg,” you started, using Angie’s innuendo.

“Nice,” he chuckled. “I’ll never hear the end of that.”

“Probably not,” you agreed before continuing. “She also gave me some good advice, which I took.”

You opened the coffee table drawer and grabbed the two tests, setting them on the table in front of him. He picked them up and stared at them wide eyed.

“We’re going to have a baby Joel.”

“Oh my god,” he whispered. He turned to you with tears in his eyes. “Really?”

“Yes, really,” you beamed. He pulled you into a hug and let out a happy sob.

“I can’t believe it. I’m so happy,” he blubbered. Listening to him cry made you cry and the two of you sat in the embrace crying together for a few minutes. Eventually, he pulled away and put a hand on your belly.

“You’re going to be such a wonderful mother,” he said softly. “I can’t wait to watch you carry our child.”

“Thank you Joel. You’re gonna be an amazing dad.”

“I’m gonna do my absolute best baby.” He kissed the top of your head and pulled you to his chest.

“So does this mean I can have dick whenever I want?” you asked with a smirk. He looked down at you with amusement.

“You get dick whenever you want it now; why would that change?”

“Touché,” you grinned. “God, I love you so much.”

His eyes met yours and he smiled softly.

“I love you more.”

[the-dumpster-fire-of-life]

okay so i know i asked for this before but could you please turn the modern!bill dad with depression teen girl into a story pleaseee please like him comforting her or something ahahahahha

(Hello! Sure I can! Enjoy! Lowkey was listening to beautiful boy while writing this.)

Your Daddy's Here

Sometimes your life was too much. Sometimes, you just wanted to hide, sometimes you were just exhausted.

Sometimes you feel like giving up.

But your dad would not let you, and he was truly, why you stood today.

Your dad helped you in more ways than one, which is why you now stood in his doorway, silent as a child who woke up from a nightmare, seeking comfort in their fathers arms.

You contemplate for a moment, your dad asleep in his bed. You finally make your decision, turning your heel and about to close the door before you are stopped.

"Liebe?"

You stopped in the doorway, turning around slowly to see your dad had woken up, looking at your darkened frame in the door.

You fiddled with your hands, suddenly feeling guilty for waking him up once more, sniffling to help your nose as the tears refused to hide.

Bill stared at you for a moment, lagging in his sleepy state as his child stood in the dark before it clicked.

Bill sighs, giving you a small smile before he moves over in bed, making room for you like he always did, and opening the covers for you to climb in like you did when you were five.

At your dad's actions, you slowly walked over, climbing inside the safe haven of your dad's bed, getting comfortable.

"Better?" Bill asked, looking at you with a small, reassuring smile as you nodded, not looking at him, almost ashamed of yourself for bothering your dad once more.

Bill noticed, studying you for a moment before he opened his arms, an invitation for you to curl into him like when you were young, a post-nightmare or post-tour ritual.

You looked at your dad for a moment before you slipped over, hiding from the world and your worries as you hid in your dad's side, your head tucked under his chin as you laid your head on his chest.

You and your dad laid there in the dark, comforted by the silence before it was bound to break.

"...What happened, Schön?" Your dad asked, getting no answer from you for a moment, feeling you shake your head.

"...I'm so tired, Daddy." You whispered as your voice cracked, sniffling as the tears finally forced their way down, whimpering like the kid you are, the world taking its toll on you.

Bill could almost hear his heart cracking as he heard you, his daughter, crying into his chest like when you got hurt, but as you always did, you had your dad there to help you.

"I know, I know." Bill whispered, running his hand down your arm as he held you safely, hiding you from your worries.

"It's okay, dads here…I'm here. I'll always be here." Your dad reassured you, letting you cry into him for as long as you needed.

Because he was your dad, and he would always be there to hold you, no matter how old you got.

Bill was a lot of things, but being your dad was number one. And if he ever could make your worries and struggles his,

He knew he would do it for you in an instant.

You laid in your dad's arms, crying as he held you, feeling safe for the first time in a while, allowing yourself to let it out, to cry.

You don't know how long you did cry, but you did and you fell asleep soon enough.

While Bill laid awake, keeping you safe from anything that could possibly come.

He was your dad, and you his kid.

No matter what, he would do anything for you

[lulublack90]

Prompt 28 - Skinny Dip

@jegulus-microfic March 28 Word count 1058

Previous part First part

Regulus woke with his legs tangled with James’s. He’d left a note for his parents telling them they’d had a lead in the assignment Voldemort had given them. In fact, he was certain that Remus was extremely close to their quarry. 

James stirred. He pulled Regulus closer to his body and buried his face in his chest. 

“Mmmmm, I could get used to this.” He peppered kisses all over Regulus’s chest. Regulus didn’t put up any fight, enjoying the moment far too much. 

“Come on. We’d better get up. We have a lot to do today.” He pulled away from James and stretched his whole body, which just brought James right back to him. “James, get off. We have to go.” He giggled as James snuffled into his hair. 

“No, don’t want to. I’m just gonna keep you here in this bed with me.” 

A loud banging at the door soon stopped them.

“Come on, love birds. We’ve got priceless heirlooms to destroy.” Evan called as he banged on Sirius and Remus’s door and his sisters. 

It took a while for all of the Thestrals to gather that morning. But eventually, they were apparating into the caves outside of Hogsmeade. 

They followed the Gryffindors into the forest as they knew where they were going. It had made more sense to go together this way than to walk up to Hagrid’s cabin, seeing as how they’d all ended up at Evan’s last night. 

Regulus held the small chest tightly in his arms. He wasn’t about to lose them now, not after everything they’d been through to get them.

It took less than an hour to get to the part of the forest the Marauders wanted to use. They stopped in an almost perfectly round clearing. You could feel the magic thrumming through the area. It was ancient and swirled around them. Regulus placed the chest in the centre of the grassy circle and unlocked it. The ancient magic reacted to the dark magic within. It became hostile. The forest around them darkened, blocking out what little light there was.

Remus stepped forward, pressing his hands against one of the trees that lined the clearing. Regulus stared in awe as the magic slowly backed off and formed a protective barrier between them and the rest of the forest. 

Remus smiled as he took his hands away from the tree. 

“Thank you.” He whispered. 

“What was that?” Lily asked the question the others must have been thinking. Well, Regulus, Barty and Evan. Everyone else didn’t seem so shocked. 

“Werewolf,” Remus shrugged. “I’m more in tune with the natural magics than most. The forest knows what we have, and it isn’t happy. I told it we have come to destroy them, so the forest is going to keep us contained in here until the Horcruxes are all gone. So please don’t try and pass the border, or you’ll be sorry.” He looked pointedly at Barty when he said the last part. 

Regulus tuned out whatever Barty had replied. He took the Gaunt ring out of the box and laid it on the grass. 

“Are you ready then?” He asked. They immediately formed a circle around him and watched as Regulus poured Basilisk venom from one of the vials onto it. 

A thick black liquid oozed out of it, and a blood-curdling scream. They all ducked for cover, pressing their hands to their ears. But nothing happened. When they looked back, all that was left of the ring was a twisted mass of blackened metal and the stone. Regulus cast a few spells over it. 

“The Horcrux is gone, but I don’t understand why the venom didn’t destroy the stone.” He handed it to James to take care of while he set up the next Horcrux. They could deal with that later. 

Next up was the diary. It reacted much the same as the ring had. There was, however, a lot more of the inky liquid seeping out, as though the notebook had been filled with writing that they just hadn’t been able to see. 

Regulus was glad they’d managed to gather as much Basilisk venom as they had, as it looked like they’d be using most, if not all, of it. 

Hufflepuffs cup twisted and melted into an unrecognisable blob, the fragment of soul shattering and dissolving into nothing. 

He held the diadem in his hands. It was truly beautiful he didn’t want to destroy it. But for the sake of the wizarding world, he had to. 

More Basilisk venom dropped onto the delicate tiara, and it spilt and cracked into three pieces before it melted as the wailing scream pierced their ears again.

Regulus reached into the chest and took out the last Horcrux. The Locket. He placed it on the ground and looked at his friends, who stood around him in a loose circle, pointing their wands at the Horcrux. 

“Last one. Are we ready?” They nodded, and he raised the final vial of venom. But before he could let a single drop fall, the locket opened, and his mother appeared before him. He stumbled backwards, somehow managing not to spill the venom. 

Walburga sneered at him. Her mouth opened, and Regulus knew whatever she was about to say would devastate him. 

Sirius blocked his view, grabbing the vial and pouring the entire thing into the open locket.

“Piss off you evil bitch!” He snarled. Walburga screamed in a vortex of black smoke before vanishing into nothing. The locket was gone. Obliterated by the amount of venom poured on it. 

They’d done it. All the Horcruxes were gone. Shakily, he got to his feet and was barrelled over by his friends as they all whooped and cheered in triumph. 

The forest’s magic let them pass, now happier. It pressed close, almost like a hug, before releasing them. 

They came upon a stream that fed a large pool of water as they walked back to the edge of the forest.

“Well, I don’t know about anyone else, but I’m going to skinny dip in that pool!” Barty cried as he vanished his clothes and dove into the clear water. “Come on, it’s refreshing, especially after that madness.” He jabbed his thumb back towards the clearing. The others looked at each other and, after a collective shrug, joined Barty in the pool.   

Next part

[kivino]

FANTASY AU WITH VALERIA!

Word Counter - ~900 words.

Summary – self-indulgent thoughts with Rogue!Valeria in a fantasy setting!

Tags/Warnings – very much Dragon Age coded, reader is a mage/healer, mentions of blood and injury, this is very corny™, gn!reader.

A/n – wrote it almost in one go, very sorry if someone already did something like this! I originally planned for my first writing post to be Graves fanfiction that I’m working on right now, but I just couldn’t contain myself, lololol

Rogue!Valeria who stumbles into your clinic one moonlit night while running away from the city guard, hands clawing at her side, blood seeping through the delicate fabric of her shirt and vest, slipping in and out of consciousness, as she tries to hold onto the cold walls that smelled of medicine and herbs.

Rogue!Valeria who made so much noise and racket downstairs that it woke you up better than any of your assistants could. You fly out of your bed, covers and colorful duvets trailing behind you in a stream of fabric, long forgotten on the floor of your bedroom as you run down the stairs, in fear that somebody broke into your clinic, no patients of yours were staying overnight today. Any words that could’ve been said evaporate as you see a woman, bleeding out on the floor, back propped up against the counter, and…are those daggers she is carrying?

Rogue!Valeria who wakes up the next morning in someone else’s bed, her wound freshly bandaged, hot breakfast already prepared for her. And at that moment she thinks she must’ve died and gone to the Fade. Where else would she see a spirit as beautiful as you?

Rogue!Valeria who tried her best to leave this quiet haven, full of smells, colors, and so many things unknown to her (she’s no mage after all), but she just can’t, throbbing pain in her abdomen stopping her the moment she even tries to stand up among the quiet murmurs of your patients and their relatives. You throw her a stern look, and she is immediately pinned to the soft sheets like her body is not her own.

Rogue!Valeria who finally has a chance to talk to you once it’s time to change the bandages on her wound. You sit near her, your voice quiet, asking “May I?”, as you delicately remove the covers. Valeria asks if you can speed up the recovery, seeing what a miracle worker you were, treating the patients all day with the help of not only healing salves, herbs, and potions but also magic. And you decide to grant her request, hands gliding along the surface of her skin, Valeria’s stab wound slowly closing and a delicate, light scar forming. She doesn’t know how much that takes out of you until your assistant helps you walk back to your room to get much-needed rest. Her eyes lingered on your fatigued figure as her fingers keep poking and prodding at the thin skin of her new scar, feeling something warm spark inside her.

Rogue!Valeria whose gang starts protecting you. Thieves know better than to try picking any of the locks on your doors, signs carved on the worn wood by her informing them that this place is off-limits.

Rogue!Valeria who sneaks through your backdoor, knowing you always forget to lock it, seeing you sleeping on another book, laid out under your arms. She wraps you in a soft blanket, pressing her finger against her lips when she sees awake patients or assistants eyeing you two.

Rogue!Valeria who leaves the flowers she picked from the gardens of her rich targets on your windowsill, petals ruffled and worn, former beauty still recognizable. Instead of putting those flowers in the water you dry and preserve every single one of them, with time gathering small bouquets that greet you each morning around your clinic. When she visits “officially”, she asks about them and you just say that you have no idea who leaves the flowers, mischief tugging at the corners of your eyes. Valeria only grins in response. “Is that so? You must have a lot of suitors then.”

Rogue!Valeria who always leaves some of her things behind just to have an excuse to visit you again, to see you at work, to hear your laughter, and to feel your hand shake her own in a warm greeting. Each time she gets bolder, and instead of a small satchel or a dagger, you start finding her jewelry and accessories. When did she have the chance to take them off anyway?

 Rogue!Valeria who drags you to the market during fairs, insisting that you need to have some fun once in a while, as she leads you between a variety of stalls, her heart squeezing harshly against her ribs each time your fingers tighten around her hand.

Rogue!Valeria who ends up hiding with you in a narrow alleyway, hiding from the city guard that patrolled the festival grounds. She looks you in the eyes, trying to make sure you’re okay, and shoots you a sly wink, caging you between her body and the wall. She feels her breathing get quicker with each second spent like this, but you two are soon taken out of it when small sparks of fire shoot out of your fingers. Too agitated to control your magic, you get flustered, not sure why you were getting nervous in the first place. But when you hear Valeria let out a hearty laugh from your sudden supernatural outburst, everything starts to make sense.

Rogue!Valeria who never mutters a single word about her quickly developing feelings. It would complicate things. It would spoil your friendship. It would tie her down, it would cause her to become slow and eventually sink, taking you with her. Yet she couldn’t let you go. Not when her heart ached with such sweet foretaste each time she saw you running to her with your arms open. Not when her thoughts inevitably drifted to you each time she was preparing to raid another lazy lord’s manor. Not when her days already started to center around visits to your small clinic, during which you constantly looked at her with that contagious light in your eyes.

taglist - @mockerycrow @stridersdiner

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[rinsuniverse]

hello~~ can i request a woozi imagine where reader is sick but refuses to tell woozi bc she doesn’t want him to worry but he finds out anyways? thank you!!

sick with woozi! ✧˖°.

this is a cute idea and probably a canon event 😭

i imagine you're probably a hard worker and a borderline workaholic like woozi

so it's no surprise you've overworked yourself and wake up the next day feeling so under the weather

for once, jihoon got up before you, which was his first red flag

he sat up in bed and saw you shivering in your sleep

but he brushed it off, thinking you must've just been cold

he kissed your nose before leaving to go to work, not forgetting to fix your blankets in case it really was too cold

the next red flag was when it was around lunch time and he still didn't receive a text from you

"that's weird," he says as he snacks on something in his studio.

he thinks "well, it's not like they always have to text first. this is a two-sided relationship, so i'll just text to check in."

jihoon: hey y/n, i hope you're doing well

you respond rather quickly

you: omg i totally forgot to text, i woke up late and had to rush to work, so i barely had time

jihoon: it's fine, really

jihoon: are you feeling alright?

you: yeah! i'm feeling great, what about you?

he shrugged off his concern immediately, trusting you completely

little did he know, you were at work, but you were feeling terrible

you had the chills, your head was killing you, you could barely breathe, and you felt like time was passing way too slowly

but you thought that you wouldn't want him to worry about you

he's the type to helicopter over you, texting and checking in every chance he gets

and even worse, he might ask to get off work early so he can care for you

which you don't want because you know how much jihoon loves his work

the next red flag came when jihoon knew you'd get off work

you always got off work before him because he loves working at nighttime

and to make up for him always working, he has you video call him and you guys just chill on call until he gets off of work and meets with you in person

he calls you and you pick up, but you refuse to show your face in the camera

that wasn't the red flag though

because he thought, "hmm, maybe they don't want to show their face today, and that's okay"

but when he goes "hey, how was work?"

and you respond nasally with "it was pretty good, thanks for asking"

his eyebrows furrow

"you sound different"

"oh, really? it's probably my allergies"

"are you taking medicine for it?"

"yeah, don't worry about it, ji."

only he IS going to worry about it

jihoon is not dumb

he still responds with "okay, hope you feel better"

it was fine until he was almost done with work, and he was going to check in with you again thru the call, but you were sound asleep

"y/n, are you sleeping? did you even eat first?"

but there was no response

everything about you today was really odd to him and he knew it couldn't just be allergies

he tried to be rational, thinking "i have slept 20 hours in a day before, so it's fine if they sleep a lot"

but he can't help but feel a little worried for you

he does rush to your home a bit quicker than usual

he goes straight to where you were sleeping, which was on the couch

this was when all the alarms went off in his head

and the way his eyebrows furrow and a frown forms on his face when he sees you shivering, breathing unevenly, and sniffling in your sleep

"i knew it," he laughs to himself

he goes and grabs a thermometer and takes your temperature, shaking his head when he sees the fever

he shakes you gently

"oh, hey, jihoon. welcome home-"

"let's get you some food first, and then i'll warm up a bath for you, yeah?"

"what? i'm feeling fine-"

"you're not fine," he shows you the thermometer. "if you're sick, why didn't you tell me? i could've come home early-"

"that's the point. i didn't want to inconvenience you or make you worry..."

"you're not inconveniencing me. i'm just taking care of you the way you would take care of me. don't ever think otherwise."

and that's when you start crying, like a sick baby who wants comfort

he pulls you into a hug, not knowing how else to soothe you

he whispers sweet nothings into your ear like "y/n, you're okay," "please don't cry, baby," and "i'm here now, let me help"

you melt into him

he quietly cares for you

he cooks you a simple dinner and even washes the dishes afterward while you sit in a warm bubble bath he prepared for you

he then waits for you to get dressed and do the rest of your night routine, then guides you to bed, where he tucks you in

he even gets multiple different blankets in case you get the chills again

he stays up all night, going between working on his laptop, rubbing your back, replacing the cold, wet rag on your forehead, and helping you whenever you need to get up in the middle of the night for more medicine or to vomit

he probably won't kiss you or get too close while you're sick, but he'd still care for you in any way he can

overall, jihoon really cares about you. he loves his work almost as much as you, but don't feel like you're inconveniencing him. he understands this comes with being in a relationship with someone you love.

please trust him next time. he wants you to rely on him sometimes, even though he loves it when you both are your own individual, independent people a lot of the time!

thank you so much for the request! i hope you enjoyed this. feel free to request more ✧( ु•⌄• )◞◟( •⌄• ू )✧

(p.s. requests are still open! i specialize in woozi stuff, but i also don't mind writing about other svt members ς(>‿<.))