#i just want everyone to listen when i say shadow is fluffy ok

[thefakehedgehogaroundhere]

SHADOW DONT GIVE HIM CAFFEINE

THIS IS YOUR FAULT SHADOW

[mysticreigns2]

The witch's seduction

Au Roman reigns x Alessandra (OC)

(a/n: I started this story on an old blog and never finished it!)

🪄 warnings: eventual smut, angst, fluff, gothic themes.

🪄tag list: @acknowledge-reigns @mzv11 @romanthereigns @romanreignshairdresser

🪄Banner is made by me. Do NOT repost my fics without my permission! Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated!🩷

🪄if you wish to be tagged in my future fics please let me know! MINORS DNI!!!

🪄word count: 3,311

Dancing shadows and firelight were a everyday thing to her. The shadows had become friends. Familiar spirits just looking to cause mischief and scare her sister whenever she wandered a little to close. A sudden scream confirmed they had indeed done what she intended "Alessandra!!" Her sister Cassandra yelled. A deep giggle escaped her lips "i love you to!" Alessandra yelled back.

The sisters had done similar things since they were little and pranking each other had almost become boring to Alessandra. She carved something new. She carved change! The desire had become so strong that she knew there was a reason why, a witch always knows! Something better was out there for her but convincing anyone in her family compound that the outside world was safe, especially with the witch hunter out there, would be next to impossible.

She loved her family but coming into her own at the age of 28 had made her grow tired of the same old thing. "Alessandra, are you ok?" Cassandra asked. Alessandra smiled "have you ever wondered what's out there? What's beyond the gate?"

"I'll tell you what's out there! The witch hunter is out there!" Cassandra said"promise me you won't go out there!"

"I'm bored I'm here Cassandra! I snap my fingers and I get whatever I want! Just one Time I want something different!" Alessandra said.

Cassandra grabbed her sister's hand "listen to me! Nothing good is out there! We are safe in here! Please promise me you won't go out there!"

Alessandra sighed heavily "fine!"

Cassandra smiled "I love you!" She said giving her sister a kiss on the cheek.

"i love you to" alessandra smiled back.

Tonight while everyone was asleep Alessandra knew what she had to do. She was gonna sneak out of the compound! She was an adult after all, what really could they do?

Later that night

11pm, everyone is asleep and now is her chance. Walking to the gate of the compound she took a deep breath. She had already put a blinding fog over the compound so when the alarm did go off no one would see who it was. The alarm would take a few minutes to catch up so as quietly as she could she opened the gate, the henges groaning from not being used very often. A soft wind blowing alerted her she was doing something she wasn't supposed to but she didn't care!

On the other side of the gate she put her cloak over her head and shut the gate. The feeling of freedom she had just from that one small defiant move was overwhelming. She didn't have much time before the alarm went off and had to get as far away as she could. Walking through the Forest she saw creatures she'd never seen before. Fluffly creatures with buck teeth and long fluffy tales lived in the trees. Why was it day out here and night in her compound?

The deeper into the forest she went the more she loved it. Beautiful flowers that would never grow in her compound! Purple, red, pink, and blue. All beautiful shades. She picked one of the pink ones and put it to her nose "who are you?" She heard a man's voice say before she spun around and snapped her fingers to produce a dagger"witch!" The man yelled.

"witch hunter!" She yelled back taking her hold down making him stop in his tracks. She was beautiful! Her raven black hair framed her heart shaped face beautifully! Her deep brown eyes pierced through him, and her olive skin glowed in the sunlight. Her dagger was at his throat "whats your name?" He asked.

"Alessandra" she said

He smiled at her "you're not like the rest of them! None of them have ever come out here, yet you seem strangely relaxed in a foreign environment. Why?"

"i grow tired of being Able to snap my fingers and get what I want! Im bored and i've always wondered what's out here!" She said her dagger beginning to dig into his skin "why haven't you killed me already?"

He smiled at her "you're not like the rest of them! None of them have ever come out here, yet you seem strangely relaxed in a foreign environment. Why?"

"i grow tired of being Able to snap my fingers and get what I want! Im bored and i've always wondered what's out here!" She said her dagger beginning to dig into his skin "why haven't you killed me already?"

"i can see you're different! I mean you no harm! Please get rid of the dagger" he said.

Alessandra hesitated for a moment, never breaking her gaze away from his before finally making her dagger disappear "whats your name witch hunter?" She asked.

"Roman" he said putting his sword back in its sheeth "come! My cabin is just up the way" he said reaching his hand out "please come with me?"

"I will follow you witch hunter!" She said

"Roman!" He said lowering his hand in annoyance. He wasnt gonna earn her trust that easy and he knew it. Whatever happened he knew he wanted it to be with her. Something about her memorized him! He's been trained not to fall to a witch's charm and he never has. She never once tried to swoon him where most witches would. They walked the path to his cabin with her walking behind him to keep him in her line of sight. He said he meant her no harm but could she really be sure? Was this just a trap?

Soon they came to a clearing, a wheel with running water in the front "what is this strange thing?" She asked.

"that's a water mill" he said "it's where I get fresh water from!"

She was memorized at how the water turned the wheel, always running and always clear. As they walked to the door a familiar sound filled her ears "an owl?" She asked.

He smiled "something your familiar with?"

"owls are the wise ones! All seeing, and always protecting us!" She said.

"From what?" He asked

"You!" She said, her face dropping.

"Alessandra I promise I mean you no harm!" He said opening the door "here come in! Make yourself at home"

Walking in the cabin she looks around and there were candles like at her compound but they were different. They weren't floating like the ones at her compound. They were in strange golden sticks that held them in the Air.

"would you like something to eat?" He asked.

"oh I can just do this!" She said waving her hand as feast appeared in the table. "That's useful!" He smiled.

"I try!" She smiled before it faded "do you have a shower? It's dark now and I'd like to get some sleep!"

"down the hall to the right" he said "theres also a spare bedroom at the end of the hallway. I can grab you some towels if you like!"

"oh that won't be necessary!" She smiled as towels appeared in her hand.

he put his hands on his hips "of course not. I'll leave you to it"

She walked down the hallway to the shower and shut the door. The witch hunter was very handsome and not at all what she expected. She took a deep breath and set her towels down. She was gonna figure this out!

In the dinning room he sat and looked at the feast she had produced from thin air. The witch hunter wssnt supposed to allow a witch in his cabin let alone fall for one! If anyone found her here they'd both be in danger but it was to late now! They could discuss it in the morning. For now they both needed to clear their heads. A lot had to be taken in!

The next morning

Having gotten up before the witch hunter, Alessandra was out exploring the woods around his cabin. She looked at his water mill, still in awe of its simplicity yet complexity. Something so simple making yet so needed. The life force of his cabin dependent on its constant turning.

Pondering the previous night's events, her thoughts took her on a wondering maze down the waterfall that was before her, cascading into the river below it.

A sudden branch snapping brought her out of her thoughts and she turns Around quickly, producing the dagger that she had the day before and it meeting the same throat as before "we've got to stop meeting like this" he chuckled, throwing his hands up in surrender.

"I'm sorry witch Hunter but I'm still on edge. This place is still unfamiliar to me" she said turning back to the waterfall, seemingly hypnotized by it.

"Alessandra" he said "what is it about this river that has you so mesmorized?"

"it's familiar!" She said "I've seen it in a dream before but I don't remember the rest of the dream"

"premonitions?" He asked

"yes!" She said finally turning her head away from the river and looking at him. His shirtless torso being the first thing that caught her attention, then his tattoo that covered part of his chest, his whole right arm, and half his back. Her eyes following up to his face, his hair in a neat bun unlike the day before. He was the witch hunter but she couldn't deny her attraction to him "like what you see" he smirked, bringing her out of her thoughts.

"yes" she blurted out before covering her mouth realizing what she'd said "I'm sorry" she started to walk away but he gently grabbed her hand pulling her back to him, holding her close to him.

Before she could think he pressed his lips to hers with a need and hunger she'd never felt before as she reached for the sides of his face to pull him close before her mind caught up to what she was doing and she pulled away "this can never happen again!" She whispered before walking away into the woods.

"Alessandra Wait!" He yelled after her but she disappeared before he could get to her. He sighed heavily, realizing she felt what he did but because of who he was she couldn't love him or she wasn't ready to yet. He would have to let her come to him and she already had him under her spell without even realizing it.

He couldn't tell anyone he was in love with a witch. His fellow witch hunters would have him labeled as a heretic, something he knew would also put Alessandra in danger. Her family would come after him and most likely disown her. Until the witch hunters and witches could coincide they would have to keep their relationship secret.

He knew why she kissed him, the attraction was there for both of them. Alessandra was a beautiful woman! The kiss they had just shared had sent sparks through them both.

He walked back into the cabin, waiting for her to return. They had to talk about this. He could feel in his bones that Alessandra had felt that electricity to. Minutes seemed to pass like hours.

Minutes seemed to pass like hours. He worried about her being in an unfamiliar world, his world. As he sat in the cabin, a black mist began to form in the corner "Alessandra?" He asked, hoping it was her. Her beautiful black hair soon appeared, a smile plastered across his when he saw her.

"hello witch hunter!" She said, taking a seat across the table from him "I'm sorry about earlier!"

"don't be!" He smiled, hiding his joy that she hadn't forgotten about what happened "we do need to talk about that though!"

"witch hun- I mean Roman" she corrected herself, seeing the smile form on his face "I had to disappear because I couldn't bring myself to admit in the moment that I find the witch hunter attractive!" She said, trying to hide her smile, failing to hide it from his ever prying gaze. Her heart was pounding, she didn't quite understand why she was attracted to the witch hunter but she knew there must be a reason.

He stood up, walking across the room to where she was "attractive huh?" He smiled, the distance between them getting less and less as he inches himself towards her.

Her face flushed "I-" she couldn't speak for a moment, her usually snap back attitude gone.

"cat got your tongue? Or do I have the upper hand in this situation?" He smiled, stopping in front of her. She had to admit in this moment he did have the upper hand, he had her flustered, Something she wasn't use to.

She waved her hand, forming a small radio. Snapping her fingers, guitar chords began to play. It was a song that was familiar to her "Raven hair, and ruby lips" she sang, smiling at the witch hunter, lifting her hand "sparks fly from her finger tips" she smirked as small sparks shot from her fingers. She took off her cloak, revealing her outfit underneath. Her hips barely covered by a black skirt that was split on both sides, showing off her thick thighs, a midriff corset, revealing much of her cleavage.

He licked his lips at her, watching her sway to the music "she's a restless spirit on an endless flight! Oooo, witchy woman, see how high she flies!" She leaned against him, feeling him gently undo the straps to her corset."she held me spellbound in the night!"

A smile formed on his face, this was a different type of intimacy then he was use to. Most women would just throw themselves at him, but Alessandra made him come alive in ways he didn't know we're possible. Still swaying her hips to the music, she stopped when he gently grabbed her arm, pulling her to him.

In this moment, Alessandra knew the witch hunter was in control and she didn't know why but she liked it. He undid what was left of the straps to her corset, letting it slide off her breasts.

"you're beautiful!" He groaned, cupping her breasts in his large hands. She pulled her lower lip between her teeth, spinning herself around in his arms. Pushing his jacket off his shoulders, and ripping his shirt open, she pressed herself against him, their lips inches apart.

With a hunger he didn't know was in him, he smashed his lips to hers, kissing her as if he was trying to devour her. She returned the sentiment, running her hands down his hard chest, his muscles flexing at her touch. His desire for her growing with every move of their lips. Alessandra moaned Into their kiss, goosebumps forming when his hands touched her bare skin.

In that moment neither of them cared that their relationship was forbidden, Their desire for each other outweighing logic. Roman picked her up, wrapping her legs around his waist "this needs to come off!" He growled, as his lips attached themselves to her neck.

A smile formed on Alessandra's face as she waved her hand, removing both of their clothes "I can get use to this!" The witch hunter smiled.

"that's just the beginning!" She smiled, teleporting them to his room. When he realized where he was, Roman smirked "you little minx!"

Alessandra pulled her bottom lip between her teeth "what can I say? I know what I want!"

"so do I!" He smirked, slowly kissing down her stomach, to her hip "get a taste of magick, lick a witch!" As he went lower, he looked up at her, never breaking eye contact as his tongue flicked against her clit. Alessandra gasped, throwing her head back in ecstasy "fuck!" She groaned, undoing his hair that was still tied up in it's neat manbun, watching it cascade over his broad shoulders.

With each flick of his tongue he drove her closer to the edge. Her hands wove through his hair as he bucked her hips against his tongue. A deep chuckle escapes his lips "I knew you tasted delicious!" He growled.

"I d-didnt k-now-" Alessandra tried to speak but pleasure over took her, her back arching off the bed as she exploded on his lips. He lapped up every drop like a humming bird sipping nectar from a flower.

He helped her rise out her orgasm, licking his lips as he pulled away from her, his beard soaked with her juices "what were you going to say beautiful?" He asked with a soft, yet mischievous chuckle.

Her chest still having from the ecstas6she just experienced, she finally got to say what she had been trying to earlier "I didn't know you were a silver tongued menace!" She said in between breaths, a satisfied smile on her face.

"that's just the beginning!" He smirked, mimicking her earlier statement. He crawled over top of her, his lips finding her neck once more "my tongue works wonders but wait til I make you scream my name while I fuck this beautiful pussy!" He growled in her ear.

She moved her head to attach her lips to his neck, mimicking him "or is it you who's gonna be screaming my name while I'm bouncing on that cock!" She growled In his ear. Roman felt his cock twitch, she was the first woman to match his energy and it turned him on even more.

In a swift motion he flipped her over, lifting her ass in the air so her dripping pussy was against his hardened flesh. He teased her soaked core, sliding himself through her slick folds "so damn wet for me baby girl!" He growled.

"please!" She begged, wiggling her ass. He snakes his hand into her hair, pulling her head back "please what?" He said, his voice deep with need, but stern enough to make her pussy drip even more "please just fuck me!" She groaned.

Well since you asked so nicely!" He growled, sliding his hardened flesh in her warmth "uhn! You're fucking soaked baby!" He groaned, sliding In slowly, letting her adjust to him.

Alessandra buried her face in the pillow, trying to hide her loud groans "arch that back for me beautiful, let me hear those moans!" He growled, moving his hands to her hips.

"My gods you're so fucking tight! Mhm!!" His groans became louder as he bottomed out in her soaked pussy, pulling out before sliding back in again, each thrust harder then the last. Alessandra matches his rhythm, bouncing her ass against him "fuck! You feel so good!" Alessandra groaned, looking over her shoulder at him. Romans group.on her hips tightened. Her pussy was suckling him in each time he pulled out of her "fuck! The way that pussy is gripping my cock! Uhn! You've spoiled me any other woman! You little minx!" He growled.

Alessandra smiled, bouncing her ass against him more. Each time he'd hit her spot, her pussy would squeeze him, milking him as he fucked her into the bed.

Both of them knowing they were proving watched by both sides of magic but neither of them caring. They were to lost in the moment to care.

"Fuck!" Alessandra groaned, her walla tightening around him. "That's a good girl! Give it to me!" He growled, his own release nearing. He felt her walla squeeze him and Alessandra's groans echoed off the Walls.

"You just keep milking my cock! Fuck I'm gonna cum!" His groans echoed hers, his grip on her hips tightened as his thrusts became erratic, his orgasm spilling his seed Into her in what felt like the best orgasm of his life. Alessandra kept bouncing her hips against his, helping him ride out his orgasm.

He slowly pulled out of her before collapsing on the bed, his chest heaving up and down "c'mere beautiful!" He smiled at her, pulling her close to him "that was incredible!" He smiled.

Alessandra laid her head on his chest "the witch seduced the witch hunter!" She giggled..

He gave her a small kiss before he smiled at her "it would seem she did!"

[punk-in-docs]

Ok ok ok I cannot stop thinking about the dynamic of Eddie x Pencils when they’re in their new fluffy lovey relationship. Possibly even Eddie being jealous AF cause all his friends just love hanging out with her (maybe a little too much) I just love them together. I can see Eddie being all screechy/shrieky cause he’s not getting one on one time and it’s starting to piss him off! Love those two sm!

🕷 Green is the Colour 🕷

Eddie Munson x Reader

6.6k words

Summary: EDDIE X PENCILS RIDE AGAIN - listen I’ve been thinking about this ask for two days and I thought what if- what if everyone else loves pencils so much and rudely robs Eddie of her time and the fallout of the kids being all steal ya girl- poor Eddie-

“I swear man, I’m about to start plastering her poster on telephone poles and milk cartons. It’s getting pretty freakin’ dire over here.” Eddie speaks as he presides over the squares of the board splayed before him.

Friday night. Doused under the blooming tulip bulbs of the Hellfire club room. Shadows spot the room where the dramatic lights can’t scrape. Swimming sea blue and fiery Sahara amber.

The candles are lit. Jerky flames flicker their licks of light. Stage set. Atmosphere geared up for the adventure and the conflict that may come. The dice are gathered. Board awaits. Poised for another one of Eddie’s imaginative campaigns.

Some would say sadistic- he would say mildly warped at best.

Folks were still strolling in from end of class. Numbers not assembled to full platoon yet.

Gareth, Jeff, Sinclair, and Matt are the first ones to rock up. Still waiting on his other tardy freshmen. They sit at the table. Drink sodas. Scarf down the snacks Gareth bought cause it was his turn. Cheetos, red vines, pretzels, and Reece’s pieces.

Eddie chucks himself back in his throne. Sits with his heels popped on the table edge. They sit and slowly kill time. He listens to them munch chips loudly, bicker over dumb shit, and somehow, the conversation had turned its attentions onto you-

His pencils. His maiden. The Art to his Garfunkel. Only much, much, hotter.

Gareth chucks Eddie a Reece’s cup. He catches it one handed - but there’s no celebratory fist pump. No jerking smile. He doesn’t scoff it down in three seconds like his usual bottomless-pit style when it came to candy.

He’s subdued. Something irks at him. Like a thread he can’t find the end of. He taps the edge of the table.

“So you haven’t seen your girl in a while then huh?” Jeff asks in reply to Eddie’s statement about milk cartons. A sloped smile on, as he snaps open a Pepsi can.

“Nada.” Eddie answered. “It’s really starting to grind my gears.”

You ate lunch at their table some days. Were welcome to, in fact. Sought after. Your absence is noted on the days you don’t, with curiosity and longing.

You caught a ride with Eddie to school. Mixing with them with no hint of awkwardness, and arguing about which was better, Sabbath or Motörhead.

I’m sorry but Motörhead rules in my book. Have you heard Lemmy play? Like c’mon open those ears kiddos. You know Ozzy wanted originally wanted to call ‘Iron Man?’ Metal bloke. C’mon.

As Eddie walked into school with his arm slung around your shoulders. You were still arguing with Jeff about it. He couldn’t get a word in. Once you start arguing about music you cannot be placated.

Alright, alright then can we at least agree that Twisted Sister is better than Bowie, Jeff tried in vain to argue.

You turn to your boyfriend. Clutching your pearls. Choking on the crazy statement.

Edward the children are delusional. What have you been feeding them? LSD?

He cackled all the way to class.

You got in on their jokes. Poked fun with them at the jocks. Correct their English homework when they get spelling mistakes, cause you happened to walk that class last year and got an A+.

Dustin honey, you spelt transcendence wrong. As you rubbed out his mistake with him with the end of your pencil eraser and filled it in. Told him to put his argument in the first paragraph to give it more punch up top. Science he got, lit essays were hard.

Your girlfriend is a freakin genius, man.

You think I don’t know that? C’mon you think I couldn’t pull the brainiest, hottest chick around? Please? I’m beating off chicks with a stick over here. Comes that devil Munson grin.

You patted his chest. Do I need to put a tongue depressor in your mouth? Are you getting hallucinations again?

C’mon pencils that was one time after a bad trip.

You’re slowly growing into familiarity in the social circles Eddie turns in.

Not like you could be apart for long. You two were inseparable and grossly in love. The making out was frankly, sickening, in its duration, frequency, and volume. Like something strummed right out a carpenter song. Heart throbbing teen love. And oh, it’s clutches were fierce.

That was, when he could lay eyes and hands on you. Which hadn’t happened now for four hellish, crawling days. Time is being waded through treacle for him.

It’s making Eddie fucking itch.

“Maybe I should file a police report.” He jokes. But in all seriousness, it’s actually crossed his funky little mind.

“I think I saw her earlier. She was out in the lot helping that Mayfield kid. Putting stickers on her skateboard or something.” Gareth told him.

“Not you too, red.” Eddie sighs muzzily as he crashes his head back to his seat in despair. Arms flailing out. Pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Does everyone in this school get a bigger slice of her than I do? Oh you know. I’m only her boyfriend for fucks sake.” He whines.

“She is pretty cool though.” Matt piped up. “Even by our admittedly limited standards.”

Eddie side shoots him a acid glare that says ‘yeah, no shit.’

“She busy with schoolwork or what?” Sinclair asks.

Eddie flails his hands. A mock attempt at trying to assuage his lovesick heart.

“I guess. I mean she does looovvve to stick her head in the books that one. Or she’s always sketching away. I know she had a history paper at the start of the week she had to stay home and work on but seriously, I’m dying of vicious neglect over here.” He makes a clawed hand over his heart like it’s gonna slowly squeeze to a stop.

“Yeah, it’s like we’ve gone what? Three lunch times now without seeing you guys noisily attached to each other’s faces.” Sinclair the elder, chuckles.

Eddie lobs a Reece’s piece at his head. “Ow. Hey?”

“That was called for. You know it. Pain is a part of life.” Eddie frowns at him.

“You’re just snippy cause you haven’t sucked face in so long.” Sinclair pointed out.

“I wonder if she remembers what I look like.” Eddie dreamt dazed. Staring at the ceiling so wistfully. Always so dramatic.

“It’s Friday night. I’m sure she’ll be free.” Jeff tries to play the kind and hopeful card.

“She better. Or else I’m not joking about that milk carton idea.” He wags an over accessorised finger in warning.

“Yeah, yeah.” Gareth placates as he chews on a red vine.

The bang of the doors has Eddie’s eyes slamming across. Ready to beat seven shades of shit out the tardy pair. Hellfires club rules were absolute: Eddie was known to take his rules seriously. To the death.

Henderson and Wheeler come careening through the doors. Wary of the lateness of the hour. Incurring the Munson wrath.

“Hey, don’t mind us.” Dustin says as they throw themselves into their usual seats and grab their things.

“Sorry we’re late. Got- held up.” Wheeler explained as he rooted elbow deep in his bag.

“Oo red vines. Gimme.” Dustin screeches. Mike snatches for the Cheetos packet.

“It’s ok man. We were just talking about Eddie and how he hasn’t seen pencils in like, forever. It’s driving him nuts.”

Silence. Thick as soup. You could sip it.

Eddie drags his eyes up and catches the way Wheeler flicks his eyes across to Henderson. Who has suddenly clammed right the hell up. Sat there holding a red vine.

Henderson usually trilled on and on like tweetie pie. Something was definitely up. All was not right in whosville. Boy better not bother with poker. Not with a giveaway face like that.

Those whiskey dark Munson eyes never missed a thing. Dagger tips that scratch into his two young opponents.

Henderson knows they’re being scrutinised. The way that crazy mane of Eddie’s flicks where he tilts his head at the two of them.

He braces his arms suddenly on the throne and sits up to crouch on his heels. Dustin and Mike actually flinch.

Their terrifying rabid DM coming level like a metal perching gargoyle. Really, Hellfire wasn’t Hellfire without Eddie scrambling around or climbing on shit.

“Something to say there, gentlemen?” He pressed. Sawtoothed edge to his voice that grates. Cuts skin. He claps his hands together.

“No. No. Nothing man.” Henderson spits out. His knuckles are white on the edge of the table.

At the same time of Wheeler’s “Nothing. Nothing at all.”

They’re prickling with sweat along the hairline. Hands fidgeting with their back pack straps. Plus, the inevitable fact that Eddie’s dark-cold stares are among the most intense things ever known to man. Arctic frostbite skimmed off a razor cold ocean could cut less.

Through narrowed whiskey eyes. “Have a seat.” He bit out each word.

Dustin tried to make small talk as he unzipped his bag. Got his character sheets. Very loudly excited over the prospect of snacks. Loved everything. Everyone looks good tonight. Everyone’s good. Good, man. Cool.

Wheeler just kept his mouth shut. Eddies eyes burned holes in the both of them like bleach.

“Why so late.” Eddie asks punchily. Creeping accusation hangs heavy on his tone.

“Uhhhhh. We-“

“We, why are we uh, late? Mike do you- recall.”

Eddies white knuckles crack together. His teeth will soon be dust.

“We… ran into Mr Clark. He started chatting about- science and, shit. You know, other stuff.” Mike got out.

Eddies bullshit-o-meter was creeping into the red. Hazards flashing. Alarm bells wailing. The rest of the guys at the table are side eyeing each other with drawn back smiles. Biting lips to stem laughter.

“Name the stuff.” He grins. So wide. Too wide. Scary wide. Calling the bluff.

Mike gulps. Dustin’s mouth gaped and no words came out.

“Man-I-think--I-think-we-should-just-tell-him.” Dustin whispers out the side of his mouth. Turning to Wheeler who was crumbling under the famous Munson poison stroked gaze.

“I feel like a rat.” Wheeler explains.

“Funny. Cause In about five seconds I’m gonna feed you to an entire army of rabid rats unless you spill, and tell me what the shit is going on.”

“We, have an advanced calculus test on Monday.” Dustin piped up.

“And?” Eddie urged snappy.

“And, uh, we needed some help and luckily, you know this really awesome someone, very selflessly offered us some assistance in furthering our education. Which is really nice of them, when-when you think about it” Dustin yammered.

Eddie nodded. Sucking in a deep breath. Eyes darting back and forth on them.

“This someone-“ He started.

“Man I told you he’d be wicked pissed.” Wheeler snuck out the side of his mouth at Henderson.

“Shut-the-hell-up. It was your idea.” Dustin hissed between clenched teeth.

“Describe them to me.” Eddie waved his hand in a curling motion.

“Who?”

“This selfless being who helped you. Describe them.” Eddie’s eyes threaded with steel.

“What?”

“You heard me.”

They blink owlishly at him. Mouths slack like guppy fish.

“Medium height. Hair. Uh, Eyes.”

“Do they also have feet and teeth, cause that’s not narrowing down any of the general populous for me.” He bitches at them.

“Studies art. Likes all kinds of cool music. Works in the record store. Loves Billy Idol. Bout yay big-“ Wheeler explains. Holding his hand up to roughly your height.

“You probably… know who we’re talking about… now.” Dustin summed up with a closed fist nervously waving in the air. Smoothing his clammy hands down to the table top.

Eddie slumps back to his chair. Rubs his fingers into his temples. A storm of pins starting to thunder at the roof of his skull. Like top pitch Slayer shredding screams in his ears. It’s deafening. Pins and needles plucking in his brain.

“Let me get this straight-“ He announced with the usual Dungeon Master fanfare from his ornate throne. Voice booming in the quiet of the echoing room.

He crosses his arms. Rattle of his chain bracelet. Clack of those rings as he swirls a finger in the air trying to pluck at the right words.

“I couldn’t lay eyes on my own girlfriend for the entirety of my week. I don’t see her at lunch. Or after school. Not a peep. I look everywhere for her today. And I mean everywhere man, and now you’re sitting there, telling me, she was helping you pipsqueaks, finish your calculus paper?”

He leans forwards and stabs his finger into the tabletop. The whole thing quakes. Storm Munson hitting hard. Expect casualties.

Wheeler looks at his shoes. Dustin nods nervously.

“That’s hmm, about uh right. Yeah-“

“You are skating thin thin ice my friends.” Eddie warns.

“Whilst we’re on the subject, I suppose I should mention, I uh, did invite her over to watch band practice tomorrow night. She said she’d bring cookies.” Gareth revealed.

“Awhh neat score man. What kind?” Matt asks.

“White chocolate and raspberry.” He grinned.

“Oh my god.” Jeff giggles in glee. Fist pumping.

Eddies fit to tear his hair out.

Wondering how long he would have to spend in prison for the completely spontaneous and cold-blooded murder of his entire DnD club.

He wonders if he could make it worth it. Or to the border-

“I can’t believe I have to share my girlfriend with all of Hawkins and now I have to try and compete with you morons? Unbelievable.” He mumbled to himself.

“Are we gonna start this campaign or what?” Gareth asks. “As you say, we don’t come here to chit-chat. We’re here to play.” He pushes his hand on the table before him in emphasis.

“You’re lucky I don’t banish you.” Eddie snaps. Eyes crazed.

“Banish me? Wait. Like in real life. Or the game?”

Eddie stares at him for a second too long. Raps knuckles on the table.

“Haven’t decided yet.”

Gareth shrinks in his seat.

“C’mon man take it easy. Nothing wrong with everyone liking her. Surely that’s a compliment right?” Jeff tries to argue.

“Oh yeah. I’m feeling the benefits right here. Hey, if I need any help scheduling a date with my girlfriend anytime soon I’ll just ask one of you bozo’s. She free tonight, how about next Thursday?” He jokes around. All jocular and pissy.

“Nah man, she said she was going home tonight to-“ Dustin began but tapered off when Eddie shot his famous ‘really’ look. Deadly.

“…study for chem lab.” He finished slowly. “But she said to say she’d call you…. After… Hellfire.”

Eddies committing war crimes in his head. Truly.

“I detest you all so much. Let’s start please, before I-“ He clenches his hands and cracks his knuckles. Takes a deep breath.

“So, we start in the wild plains of-“ Eddie explains. Voice slipping into hushed storytelling mode.

“Hey, does she play DND?” Gareth interrupts, with something that definitely looks similar to flirtatious. Big big smirk.

Eddie glares. It’s steeped in all kinds of poison.

He reaches across and flicks over Gareth’s figurine. It clatters to the floor.

“Oops. Look at that. Bad storm.“

~

The sun dips low over the low slanted street of houses as you walk up the smooth tarmac of Gareth’s drive towards the Garage. The Fall night pricks unkind at your back and churns your breath silver.

Through the trees on the horizon the sky is stroked into layered slices of punchy lilac and petal pink. Black trees loom thick from the woods like prickly pine sentinels.

You’re lugging a tugging heavy bag crooked on one arm, and a whole plate of cookies in the other. Rocky road and raspberry and white chocolate. Teenage boys ate like a ravenous pack of wolves half starved.

You smile as you come to the muffled metal wall of sound thrashing it’s rhythm the other side of that garage. The crash of drums. The bass. The cry of that warlock you recognise so well.

Hands not free, you rap awkwardly on the clanging door with your elbow. You ick when your banging disturbs some rain drips that scatter off the overhang and drips chilly down your collar.

You gaze up as an eruption happens the other side of that door. You smile at hearing the music come crashing resoundingly to a clunky screech and stop. The pitchy whine of the amps and microphones.

Voices blare over the din. You hear the rush of footsteps. Sneakers scraping over the tarmac. You know exactly whose-

The garage door clunks up so fast with a fierce rattle. Rolling from the other side. Showing you in slow degrees, the red drum set. The mic stands. Rust square of carpet. The corroded coffin sign emblazoned proud on the wall.

Cords snaked everywhere. Boxy amps and all those metal posters Gareth tacked around the place. Half of them were from you. You bought him two more today from work that Sal let you snag.

You hear Eddie’s shrieky shouts rattle at the door. “Back off. Hey, hey hey hey, back off. My girlfriend, man. Mine.”

“Hey guys- uhfff“

A gut punch of a sudden attack crashes into you because your boyfriend ducks under the partially open door, and full body tackles you. Like the scurrying menace of a jangly golden retriever that he is. Beloved guitar slung right around his back. He toddles you backwards down the wet driveway.

You hold your arms out either side with the cookies in one, and your bag in the other as he limpets like lichen. He bends his knees and scoops you up off the floor. For a skinny guy he was freakishly strong when he had to be. Your sneaker toes scuff and drag the rain sheened tarmac.

Wiry leather arms enclosing you. But they’re strong too, clutching you to a firm warm chest draped in a black Zeppelin tee. His mouth at your neck. Apple smelling hair tangled in your mouth. Elbow hooked around your head.

You hum a smile. Cause it’s just entirely wrapping you up. Leather and bar soap. Red smoke smacking into you. Eddie. He’s burying you alive in one of his all encompassing hugs that you just burrow yourself into. Warm t shirt body surrounded by the outer colder layers of denim and leather.

You knock your head to rest into his. Whole body fluttering with the giddiness of being near again.

Eddies hooked his arm around your neck like he’s keeping you there, hostage.

Sweat damp bangs and burning off so much manic energy, and a smile splitting his lips. Waterfall spill of curls cupping that face. Making a frame out of those intense espresso dark eyes.

“Missed you.” He rumbles as he rubs his cheek on your hair. Delighting in the smell of you in his nose. Coconut and perfume. You, soft and real under his hands and you’re here- listening to the slow dub-dub of his heart as he holds you closer than was physically possible. If you were any closer you’d be on the other side of him.

“Never would have guessed-“ You smart at him. But you can’t crow too loud. Your stomach is cartwheeling. This boy has you so soft. It had been an interminably miserable week without him. Like being sat in the darkness for a week without your spots of golden sun.

“Missed you too, Munson.” You peck a kiss back on the side of his head. “You gonna put me down anytime soon?”

“Unlikely.” Is his answer. If anything he wraps around you tighter. Squeezes the stuffing out of you like a crushing boa. Like he could crush you up and snort you. Swallow you. Anything- still wouldn’t be close enough.

He does put you down. Mainly so he can cup your face and shove his lips onto yours. Warm hands on your cheeks tugging you to a messy kiss. He presses every ounce of yearning into it. Pours it into you via those pillowy lips.

“Gotta stop that annoying school habit. Y’know. It’s really getting in the way of my quality one-on-one pencils time.” He says with the tip of his nose brushing into yours. Stroking your hair back off your neck.

“Fine. It goes. Tomorrow.” You smirk back.

Tipping in so he can kiss you again. You smooch him all slow. He leans into it. Humming a moan that sends a reactive zing up your spine. You want to grab at his denim back and kiss him some more but your hands are annoyingly full. He sucks on your lower lip and scraped teeth, your breath skips.

“Please for the love of god, keep it PG.” Gareth calls out. Sat at his drums still. Twirling his sticks in hand as the band stands and watches Eddie kiss and kiss, and twirl you around in the cold stained twilight air. How it brushed you both in cloaking purple.

“We don’t need to see that.” Matt piped up. Looking down at his guitar.

“Man, you ruin all my fun.” Eddie grins back at his friends. Slinging his accessorised fingers into your belt loops. Reeling you inside.

“Can you take these before my arms freakin fall off?” You laugh to Eddie.

“For me? Shucks.” He takes the cookie plate off you. Of course he does.

“Don’t scarf them all down to yourself like last time.” Matt pleads.

“Or lick them all.” Jeff adds.

Eddie is already tearing the saran wrap off and shoving a rocky road cookie right into his mouth. The whole thing. Opens his mouth as he chews making his signature demon face. Charming.

Covering his shirt in a waterfall of dark chocolate crumbs. You kindly brush them off him as you step past.

“Sounded good guys. Another Judas Priest cover?” You ask as you come inside and dump your bag down by the ratty old couch off to the far side.

“We’ve almost got enough new covers for a set“

“Next gig at the hideout is in two weeks, right?” You asked. You recall Eddie telling you over the phone.

“Yup. And we wanna have a couple of new songs rehearsed by then.” Jeff says. Nervously trailing his hands over his guitar strap. Shuffling his feet on the squashy carpet.

“Nice one.” You comment. “Can’t go wrong with Judas Priest. Though you know in my opinion you should totally throw a little Blondie in there. Crowd pleaser.”

They all groan in unison.

“You always say that. Or Talking Heads. You’re unnaturally obsessed.”

“Debbie Harry is such a babe though, man.” Gareth sticks his tongue out.

“Really?” You ask as you stand and chew a cookie. “This coming from the boy who has the Kim Wilde poster up in his bedroom.”

“That’s not mine. It was my sisters.”

“Crawled it’s way into your room did it?” Eddie winked at you. Beaming. Leaning against the couch arm.

“I hate you guys.” Gareth decided.

You round back and confiscate the cookie plate off Eddie and hand them round. He snatches off what he can before they’re ripped away. Noisily sucking chocolate off his fingers.

The guys cluster around to get one. About time they stopped for a break and a snack anyhow. He’s all set to pout at you until:

“I also have a Six pack in my bag.”

Eddie’s smile whips back around tenfold. “God, you’re a babe.” He sticks his lips to your temple with a disgusting wet smooch. All lips and spit.

“Awh c’mon.” Gareth opened his arms wide. Disappointed at the lack of the beer being shared around.

“It’s band practice not a kegger.” You pointed out. “Besides I brought Pepsi and spent half an hour of my day making cookies for you guys. I’m not totally evil.”

That was met with a chorus of disgruntled mumbles and grunts.

“Evil pencils.” Eddie whirled in close and hissed naughtily in your ear. His breath on your neck made goosebumps break across your skin.

“I’m sorry. When did you all turn 21? I must have missed the party invites.” You smile at them with your arms crossed. Stroking your hand over Eddie’s arm, as you made sure they all got a cookie.

He made a ‘suck it’ face to his band mates as he cracked open a cold one.

“You’re 18 and Eddie’s 20.” Matt unhelpfully pointed out with a grin.

“Watch your mouth when you talk to your elders.” Eddie pasted his chest to your back as you handed the plate around. A ring clad hand flashes for another one. White chocolate and raspberry was his weakness after all.

“You can’t have all the cookies and a beer. Not fair man.”

“Pencils baked the cookies. Guys. Pencils is my girl. Which means that the cookies are mine too. SO, you only partake if I decide to let you, idiots.”

“So, if she’s hanging out here with us in band time, does that make her our groupie?” Gareth asks cleverly. Waving the cookie in his hand around, gesticulating.

Eddies hand reaches over and lightly flicks the curly hair near where the top of Gareth’s ear should be.

“Hey.” He winced and cupped the side of his head.

“Any more groupie talk and one of those drumsticks is going up your nose, man.” Eddie warns. Gareth did love sticking his neck out

“I’ve got two posters in my bag drummer boy, don’t make me take them back to Sal.” You threaten with a grin. Eddie is making devil eyes at him.

“What’s the score?” Eddie asked you. Hands linked around your waist. Just enjoying the way he could sway bodily into you. Chin nesting on your shoulder. Cold beer within reach. And his guitar. His perfect Saturday night was set. His two favourite chicks.

“Scorpions live tour 85’ and, a Sabbath poster from the 1980 tour Live at Last.”

“Comment rescinded, Mi’lady.” Gareth decides as you chucked him over the shiny rolls of paper.

“I’m keeping you geeks in posters and new tapes here. You should build a monument to me. Fifty feet tall.” You joke as you grab a beer.

You toss the nearly empty cookie plate down on the coffee table and fold your legs up to sit criss-cross on the old orange couch with its sagging cushions and patchwork blanket thrown over the zig-zag floral pattern.

Eddie tips his head back to look across at you. Slumps down the arm to crash next to you. “We will dance around it naked, light a fire, and beat our chests whilst howling at the moon.” He smirks with mischief skated eyes.

You crash your sloshing beer can to his. “There’s the devotion I so crave.” You admire him being close by - at last - brushing the salty sticky bangs off his head with your fingertips.

“The very least I could do. You keep these bozos happy. You keep me in beer and kisses and…” He lowers his voice and sneaks his head closer to your ear to whisper “other much dirtier things.”

You smile. Letting your head fall back to the couch cushions. Eddie’s full out and out beam catching yours. Laying his head down to this saggy couch. Slotted right next to yours.

Heaven really as a place on earth. He’s sat here gazing into your eyes like they’re a new fascinating form of glittery stars.

“It’s been a long week without you, Munson.” You tell him with a note of gladness taking up your whole throat. It was a relentless flurry heartache, of school, work, homework heaps and heaps. Too much. You feel stretched thin and brittle as burnt twine.

“Those little puffy baggies under your eyes are a dead giveaway, pencils.” He thumbs below your eyes, squishing down softly at the bags that seem darker and more black-purple than usual.

“Insane workload this week. Rudely kept me from seeing my favourite metal head.” You said with sulk.

“I can remedy that.” He twists to set his beer down on the floor. Returns with hands free to tuck you close. Hand slipping around the back of your waist. Splaying you to his chest. Plucking a deep inhaling kiss into the nest of your sweetly tropical scented hair.

“M’here now. You’re here. The world is set right again.” He comforts.

You smile and welcome the touch. Hand on his soft stomach. Grounding yourself in the barely soft pudge of his tummy through his shirt. Sat hip-to-hip at last with your menace of a metal head. Breathing in worn leather and smoky reds and it’s like he’s your jagged little rock n’ roll touchstone for normality. You can sink into relaxation now he’s here by your side.

“Apparantly you were really mean to whole of Hellfire yesterday.” You asked with humour traced on your mouth.

“That’s subjective. I can be a fair DM.”

“Mhmm? Apparently you banished Gareth.”

“He was being annoying.”

“You made him cry.”

“Who told you that?” He fidgeted. That meant it was true.

“My little birds and spies.” You mocked in a witches cackle.

“That’s concerning.” He commented.

“Lucas chatted to Red about it. She tells me all the goings on.” You inform him.

“Dammit, red.” He cursed with a silly grin.

“Why were you being mean?” You coaxed out like he was a toddler throwing a tantrum over someone touching his favourite hot red fire truck.

He slung his eyes up to yours. All dewy lashes and bambi. “Because-“ he starts with stroppy inflection. His arm unconsciously squeezed you in closer.

“They’re stealing you off me. If I can’t find you, you’re in the library helping Henderson and Wheeler with their homework. I come to see you at work and you’ve got this gaggle of meddlesome kids I have to bat away to get a look in. I find you at lunch and you’re monopolised drawing npc’s for Hellfire club or band posters for our next gig.”

You can’t help smiling. Oh, Eddie.

“Here, I didn’t even ask you here tonight. Gareth did. You brought cookies for them all and posters for the little shithead. You ask Jeff about his mom and his brothers broken friggin leg, and Matt’s asthma.”

“Is his brothers leg any better?” You check.

Eddie grits his teeth.

“He broke it at the football try outs. He so wanted to make the team. It was very traumatic.” You added openly.

“I just wasn’t counting on having to share you around with the entirety of Hawkins High.” He shakes his head. His hair goes all flicky. Something sad skates across his eyes.

You parse his sullen words through a filter:

One day you might chose them over me. And I wouldn’t blame you if you did.

“Munson?” You say seriously. He sulks but catches your gaze. “What?”

You answer by cupping his chin and lean in to smooch him real slow. The way he likes. He can’t stand half ass cold little pecks on the cheek. What have we been married for forty years- fuckin C’mere I’ll show you a kiss, pencils. Propriety be damned.

Eddies way was always to devour whole. All or nothing.

You hold onto his face even when you pull back. Lips all kiss stung. His eyes are all yummy and dark chocolate heavy. He’s dazed already.

“I don’t mind the babysitting. They’re cool kids. They adore the absolute shit out of you, and I’m glad they don’t despise me. And this goes without saying but I only have one rockstar in my life. That’s always gonna be you, baby. Period.” You tell him. Rubbing your thumb across his jaw.

“Yeah?” He asks all dopey. Puppy grin on his big silly mouth.

“Fuck yeah.” You grin. Eddie kisses you so hard it tips you sideways.

You laugh and it’s mumbled and crushed onto his lips. His sneakered foot flails out and catches his beer. Whips it over. Hoppy bud lite spilling everywhere.

His band mates clamour over the new sight of you both slanted horizontal on the couch. Eddie piling on top of you and some definitely sloppy making out happening.

“Heyyy-“ they all shout. “No dear god, please stop.” Like you’re a couple of dogs they’re trying to stop from humping.

“No no. We don’t have time for you guys to be horizontal right now. We have band practice!”

Eddie ignores them. Selective Munson hearing.

“Come over after this?” He asks with a low tone that you definitely catch onto the very sultry meaning of.

“Unchaperoned? Brazen. I’ll be ruined.” You tease.

“I’ll make the ruination very worth your while.” He picks the back of your hand up and kisses it all soppy and daft.

“Don’t you always.” You smile. Biting your lip. He’s simping hard when he nuzzles into your neck and lays out his arguments. Giving you those huge sad baby cow eyes.

“I’ve got a list of reasons you should accompany me home.”

“What are they, pretty boy?” You ask. Tucking hair behind his ear before it sticks to his lips.

“Number one, You just called me pretty…” He held up as his hand as he ticked off his reasons.

“Number two, you’ve got a really nice butt. Really. It’s like, super cute.”

“Thank you. Number three?”

“Wayne’s missed you. Asking me every damn day when I’m bringing you over again and you know I don’t like to disappoint.”

“Of course.”

“Number four, there is a spider in my room that looks like it might eat me. And I need a witness in case it tries something.”

“I’ll have to consider that.” You negotiated. But truth be told you made your mind up hours ago.

“I might consider it. Even if only for the express reason of spider protection. Not for any other reason whatsoever.”

He nods solemnly. “Mhmm yeah. I’m just trying to be safety monitor you know? Safety in numbers.” He says as he slides his hand up your sweater. Brushing over your stomach. You hold his hand over you.

“I like your thinking.” You tell him. He seals a lush kiss at your lips. Playing around with you.

Eddie parts from you with a sticky smooch. Licking lips. Your fingers tunnelled into the back of his hair. Lost in the sea of wild curly black. “Later, rockstar.” You bite your lip.

He blushed so much at your praise. That’s one other gorgeous thing. The amount of compliments you can pour into this boys ear in whispered praise or dirty filth: he lights up with the giddiness of it every time. Bulb bright. Megawatt.

He scrambled up and off you. “Alright, alright you little shrimps-“ He hissed moans and groans where he hauled himself up, and away, after smacking a wet kiss to your cheek that lingered.

“Where were we huh?” He crowds in and peers at the scribble of their set list. Leaning over to take a look.

You mop up the spilt beer with the too big sleeves of your sweater. Dabbing the floor. Gareth’s mom wouldn’t care for the garage being left smelling like a frat house.

You put the can back into the table. Laughing to yourself as they start to bicker over what song should be next.

Jeff sidles over to you all nervous as you’re knelt on the cold floor. “Can I beg a favour?”

He gets a pretty mangled tape out of his pocket. “Player in the car chewed it up on the way over. I know you have the touch.”

“Indeed I do.” You wipe your beer hands over your jeans and shimmy your fingers and take it off him with a curling grin. Slipping a Bobby pin out your front jeans pocket. “Leave it with me kid.”

You look down at the Corey Hart tape. Hook a brow. “Sunglasses at night, Jeff?”

“It’s my moms.” He offers all jittery. Hands sliding into his pockets. You nod. Carefully handling the shiny tape that needed rewinding.

“That’s what I say to Eddie about the Bryan Ferry and ABC I have shoved under my car seat and if you dare tell him- I will kill you ten different ways.” You grin with narrowed eyes. “Everyone’s allowed a guilty pleasure.”

“Secrets safe with me. You’re awesome.” He lisped bashfully, before joining the rest of his band. Who were now breaking out into a full blown argument now. The air fragrant with it. Thick shouts and interjections layered over each other. Everyone rising over each other to be the loudest.

Eddie is, of course, winning. Shaking his mad head and snatching the red sharpie and scrubbing over Gareth’s writing and almost running the pen over his fingertip on the page.

Stuffing another cookie in his mouth. They’re clamouring louder and louder. He’s spitting crumbs everywhere and now it’s turning into “Ew, gross dude.”

You shake your head and settle on the couch cross legged, sipping back cold beer occasionally, and patiently put Jeff’s poor mangled tape back to rights.

“You’re coming right?” Floats over to you. You break your concentration and look up. Gareth is talking to you.

“To what? You ask. Feeling behind and dumb.

“Our gig at the Hideout. It’s totally your thing.” Gareth flirts.

“Mmm audience of six drunks. I promise to be there and to misbehave.” You say methodically as you focus back on the cassette.

Eddies giving his best Billy Idol attitude glare at Gareth’s head. “Did you just invite my girlfriend to our gig?”

“What? She’d totally be into it.” He defends.

“Nothing wrong with getting some babes in the audience, right?” You shrugged, looking over at Eddie with a snappy wink.

“Exactly.” Gareth answers. A touch too flirty.

Eddie inhaled deep in rage as he snatched his own drumstick off him. “This is going up your nose, now.” He snapped.

Gareth wound around the drum set and Eddie gave chase. You watched them loop the damn thing ten times whilst Eddie shrieked at him and aimed random things at his stupid curly head. Half a cookie. An Iron Maiden cassette tape. Empty Pepsi can.

Symbols clash where they sprint past. Dodging cords underfoot. “Interfering son of a- MY girlfriend. You hear me, MINE, you lil shit.”

You stayed in your corner. Saturday night now apparently in full swing. Shaking your head as you smiled. Boys.

~

The crickets are creaking and the stars were vivid, winking so bright, when you and Eddie step out the garage door, and into the relentless night air. Thick and cool. So smooth you could sip it like a dirty martini.

It pricks bumps up your arms as he slings his metal clad fingers through yours, and lopes along with you. Band stuff corralled messily into the back of his beaten old van.

He stops when he scans the street. Shoes scuffing the sheet of tarmac.

“Huh.”

He flicks his eyes around. You lurch ahead of him. His hand still stuck wrapped in yours.

“Something up?” You ask.

There’s a glint of promiscuity in your eyes. It’s a menacing conspiratorial look. One that you’ve studied and poached off him, no doubt.

“Lack of a certain Capri sat on the curb out here, pencils.” He looks around. Making sure his eyes don’t deceive him.

You grin. “Yeah huh. How strange.”

He comes level to you. Twirls you into his chest. Arms linked around your middle. Those pillowy lips grazing the top of your jaw. Clever Pencils.

“Guess l’ll have to stay over now.” You accept. One hand over his. The other holding your overnight bag you’d assembled hours before.

“Seems that way.” He flirts all grinning, as he waddles you down the drive. Inside he’s fist pumping and yowling at the top of his lungs.

He pitched for you again. Leaning down and shouldering into you. Biting his lip all cheeky as he growls out a sound as he flips you over his shoulder. Carrying you with your legs dangling down at his back.

“I win. Pencils. I win. Suck it kiddos. How you like me now.” He says as he clumsily runs with you down the drive.

“Eddie!” You shrill. He slaps your ass. Makes an Mmmm sound as he does.

“I got your juicy ass now baby. I ain’t sharing anymore.”

Your laughs and shrieks and his cackles echoing in his ears all the way.

~

May I also just say the feedback from this series is a fever dream cause you’re all SUCH BABES and you’re so nice leaving such lovely comments and interacting. I’m truly so grateful-as ever my thanks must be given to @wayward-rose for listening to me chat all things about Eddie a lot. Luv ya babes.

My taglist for the JQ babes; @ceriseheaven @indouloureux @fujiihime @youaremyfamiliar @captain-tch @ghosttownwherenoonegoes @svenyves @sammararaven @feralgoblinbabe @groupie-love-71 @andromeda-andromeda @starbxcks @morganamoonstone @ramona-thorns @gvtosbith @munsonswhore86 @munsonlov3r @lunatictardis @shenevertricks1831 @hazzaismyreligion @harrys-tittie @anaisweird @cerinthussulpicia @cinnamoncunt @thincrusttheworks @manicpixiedreamcurl @therosietoesy @fanficappreciationblog @thicksexxualtension @tvserie-s-world @sharp-and-swift @dadsbongos @2clones-1kamino @edsforehead @chcolateeyelver @seven-glass-kids @forever-is-not-for-everyone @creme-bruhlee @bkish @wayward-rose @wyverntatty @latenighttalkingwithgrapejuice @churchmuffins @chickpeadumpsterfire @choke-me-levi @prozacandnicotine @xeddiesbattattsx @s-u-t @alyssaaaaa-r

[drabbles-mc]

Tempting Offer

EZ Reyes x OFC (Aanya Reyes)

Request by @garbinge: Ok and 43 with whoever your heart desires as well cause I’m a sucker for a good ol true love trope (from This List)

Warnings: so much fluff

Word Count: 3.3k

A/N: I’m still not out of my writing slump. Still got a lot going on. But Anj sent me this request literal months ago and it’s been living in my brain ever since. Plus, I haven’t updated Remind Me in a hot minute so I figured doing a fluffy little prequel/spinoff would be a nice change of pace for a story that is so heavy with angst haha. I have a future chapter planned that actually references what happens in this story, so I’m excited to be able to share the real context for it all with you guys. Hope you enjoy! xo

EZ Reyes/Remind Me Taglist: @ly--canthrope @noz4a2 @queenbeered @sincerelyasomebody @sadeyesgf @thesandbeneathmytoes @appropriate-writers-name @tomhardydallasstarsgirl @kelpies-shed @louisianalady @gemini0410 @paintballkid711 @chibsytelford @yourwonkywriter @sesamepancakes @mayans-sauce @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @plentyoffandoms @georgiaaintnopeach @twistnet @themoonandthewicked @bucky-iss-bae @enjoy-the-destruction @encounterthepast @everyhowlmarksthedead @rosieposie0624 @mylittlelonelyappreciationtoo @mijop @xladymacbethx @blessedboo @holl2712 @lakamaa12 @masterlistforimagines @kkim120 @toni9 @shadow-of-wonder @crowfootwrites @redpoodlern @punkgoddess-98 @black-repunzel99 @lexondeck @mrsstevenbuchananstark @berniesilvas @lovebishoplosamiguelgalindo @amorestevens @angelreyesisdaddy04​ @samcrobae​ @langiinspirations​ @bigcreatorwombatdreamer​ @lightblindingme​ 

She knew who was at the door before she’d even heard the knock. She laughed as she made her way through her apartment, trying to slide her earring into place as she did. Pausing in front of her door, she took a moment to take a deep breath and get herself mentally prepared. It wasn’t their first date, but she still had the jitters as though it was.

Undoing the chain on the apartment door, she pulled it open. EZ was standing on the other side, hands hooked onto his belt since he hadn’t worn his kutte this time. Without a second thought his eyes scanned her over, a smile immediately taking over his features the longer that he looked at her.

“You look beautiful,” he nodded.

She bit down on her lip for a moment, her face heating up at the compliment, “Thank you,” stepping back, she waved for him to come in, “You can come in, I just gotta grab my shoes and purse and I’ll be good to go.”

“Take your time,” he lingered close to the door, glancing around her apartment.

It was the first time he’d ever stepped inside. He’d picked her up and dropped her off the last few times they went out, but he never went past the threshold of her place. She didn’t necessarily offer, and he wasn’t going to push it if she wasn’t ready or comfortable. However, as he stood there and looked around her living room and into what he could see of the kitchen, it seemed exactly like the kind of place she would live. It also made him very nervous to ever have her over at his trailer. Her apartment felt so fresh, all warm colors and walls covered with bookshelves. The one big set of windows that she had, had a bench with a few plants on it that were coming along well for being in a small apartment.

“Alright,” she was pulling the back of her shoe over her heel as she half walked, half hopped towards him. Standing upright as she landed in front of him, she flashed him a smile, “I’m ready.”

“You sure?” he chuckled.

“Positive,” she motioned for him to open the door, both of them walking through before she turned to lock it behind them. As she followed him, tucking her keys into her purse, she asked, “So do I get to know where we’re going tonight? Or is it a big surprise?”

He smiled at her as they walked down the flight of stairs to the ground floor of her apartment building, “It’s not a big secret.”

“Are we taking the bike?”

He shook his head, “It’s within walking distance.”

“Ooo,” she smiled over at him, “now you’ve got my attention.”

As the two of them walked along the sidewalk, EZ listened with genuine interest as Aanya recounted her day to him. He reveled in her stories of new books that she’d gotten into, and strange customers that she’d encountered during her day. Although if EZ was being honest with himself, he would have sat there and listened to her read every page of the phone book and he still would’ve kept his interest. She had more love in her words than most people had in their entire bodies, and he was captivated.

He stopped outside the door to a small diner, smiling over at Aanya before pulling the door open for her, “Right this way.”

Her face lit up, “I haven’t been here yet!” she walked through the door and turned around to face him, “I always meant to come here and just never made the time.”

EZ nodded as the two of them walked and found a booth to sit in, “My pops is really good friends with the woman who owns the place—she’s been buying from him for years.”

“You know,” Aanya casually flipped through the menu, “I’ve been to your father’s shop plenty of times and I’ve never seen you there.”

The statement got him to look up from the menu, “You’ve been to the shop?”

She laughed, looking over at him, “Of course. Only butcher in town, Ezekiel.”

“He’s never mentioned that he sees you.”

“Something tells me your father isn’t one for gossip,” she laughed for a moment before she paused, “You talked to him about me?” her lips curled into a smile.

“Well,” he drummed his fingers on the tabletop as he bit back a shy smile, “yea. Of course.”

They’d long since finished their dinner, but the two of them were perfectly content to just sit at the table and talk. The waitress knew EZ well enough and she very casually brought over coffee for each of them when she saw how good of a time the two of them were having. It’d been a long time since she saw EZ bring anyone around, let along someone who had him smiling the way that he was.

“I just can’t believe,” Aanya laughed between sips of her coffee, “that I’ve already met your brother. I should’ve known! I should’ve known that was him.”

“Why would you have known?” EZ chuckled.

“Because he was at your father’s shop! And he had on, you know the,” she gestured vaguely to her shoulders and chest, “the vest.”

EZ smiled, “The kutte?”

“Yes!” she pointed at him and nodded, “The kutte.”

“I feel like maybe I should mention that not everyone in a Mayans kutte is a Reyes brother. Angel just so happens to be both.”

She chuckled, nodding, “I figured that much.”

“I think Pop would lose his mind if there were any more of us,” he smiled.

Aanya laughed, “I think Felipe is usually on the brink of losing his mind anyway.”

“Raising Angel will do that to you,” he replied without missing a beat, both of them laughing.

“I’m sure you weren’t a cakewalk either, Ezekiel.”

“Well what makes you say that?” he leaned back in the booth, feigning offense before giving in and laughing.

Shaking her head and taking a moment to finish her coffee, she replied, “Your very sweet and handsome smile doesn’t fool me, EZ. I’m sure you’re just as much of a troublemaker as your brother.”

“You think I’m handsome?” he smirked.

Laughing, she nodded, “Of course I do.”

The two of them walked back to Aanya’s apartment. Along the way she’d casually linked her arm with his, leaning against his side as they walked. EZ tried not to get too lost in the sensation of it, trying to focus on what she was saying to him. He was trying to focus but there was something so comfortable, so right, about the feeling of her leaning into him the way that she was.

They made their way up the stairs, and EZ leaned against the wall next to her door as he watched her slip the key into the lock. The smile on his face was practically a permanent feature whenever he was with her, and it had been a long time since someone made him feel that way.

“I had a really good time tonight, Ezekiel,” Aanya leaned against her doorframe with a smile.

He adored the way his name sounded coming from her. With a slight nod, he replied, “Me too.”

“I’ll give you a call tomorrow when I’m done with work?”

“Yea, yea that works,” he reached forward and gently slid his hand into hers, “Let me know if any of the new deliveries look any good.”

“I always think they look good,” she chuckled, “If you want a real critic’s opinion, you should come in and talk to Laura. It’s…it’s hard for me to find a book I don’t like.”

“If you want, I can bring you some pretty terrible books.”

Rolling her eyes, she laughed, “Tempting offer, but I’ll pass.”

“Alright, but you’re missing out.”

“I guess I’ll have to live the rest of my life knowing that,” she laughed, shaking her head. Looking up and meeting his gaze, her smile softened, “Thank you for tonight. Get home safe, okay?”

“Always do,” he smiled before lifting her hand up and pressing a light kiss to her knuckles, “Talk to you tomorrow.”

Standing up onto her toes, she placed a brief kiss on his cheek, “Goodnight, Ezekiel.”

“Goodnight,” he smiled as she walked through the door and closed it behind her. Taking a deep breath, he forced himself not to linger as he made his way back down the stairs, replaying the night over in his head with a smile.

The next morning, both EZ and Angel had shown up to the carnicería first thing to help Felipe with a large delivery. Angel had immediately gotten on his little brother’s case when he saw what a good mood he was in. EZ had always been the biggest morning person out of the three men, but even with that being true he still seemed peppier than usual. After a lot of questioning from Angel as they carried in one box after another, he caved and told them about his date from the night before.

Angel shook his head, wiping sweat from his brow, “No way. No way she’s real, bro. I just don’t buy it.”

“What do you mean you don’t buy it?” EZ laughed and shook his head, “She literally stops here all the time. She’s seen you here!” he gestured to the shop in its entirety.

“Really?” Angel seem perplexed, “She talk to me before?”

“I’m assuming not if you don’t remember.”

“Not everyone’s got a memory like yours, Boy Scout.”

“Nah, but you’d remember her.”

Angel rolled his eyes, mocking his brother, “You’d remember her. Jesus, EZ. Two dates with this girl and you’re already in love with her?”

“Four dates.”

“But who’s counting?” Angel smirked, “Look, I’m very happy for you and your very real girlfriend.”

EZ gave his brother a shove, but before it could descend into an all-out wrestling match, Felipe started ushering them both towards the door, “Go finish this somewhere that I don’t need to pay for everything you break.”

“Love you too, Pop,” Angel laughed as he let his father push them both out the door, the sign on it still saying that the shop was closed.

Despite the fact that they didn’t get to talk for their whole ride over to the clubhouse, as soon as they parked their bikes Angel was right back to giving EZ grief for the girlfriend he was convinced didn’t exist. EZ shook his head and laughed, taking the jokes and low-level verbal abuse in stride the way he always did. He knew that arguing past a certain point just made it all that much more fun for Angel.

By the time the afternoon rolled around, Angel had moved on from making fun of EZ and has started going in on Coco and Gilly. EZ couldn’t say that he was upset about his brother’s shift in attention. He did, however, find himself frequently checking his phone to see if she’d texted or called. It wasn’t often that she messaged him while she was working, but it didn’t hurt to check.

He was just about to slide the phone back into the pocket of his kutte when it started to vibrate. Glancing down at the screen, he smiled when he saw Aanya’s name lighting up the screen, “Hey.”

“Hey!” her voice was bright, happy, on the other end of the line, “I’m just getting ready to leave—they got someone else in to close up tonight.”

“Oh, nice. I’m, um, I’m still at the scrapyard,” his free hand gripped the edge of his kutte.

“That’s fine, I figured. I thought of you earlier, though, when I was going through the new shipment of books that came in.”

“Did you?” he scuffed the toe of his boot against the dirt.

“I did. There’s one in here that I think you’ll really like. Can I swing by and drop it off?”

“You don’t gotta drive all the way out here. I can swing by your place if you want.”

“It’s fine, really. Besides, I have all this extra time on my hands now,” she laughed.

“Alright,” he didn’t have it in him to tell her no, “If you don’t see me, the guy Chucky who works the front office can come and get me.”

“Perfect. Alright, I’ll see you in a little bit.”

He knew that telling Angel that she was coming was only going to make the situation worse. If there was no time for him to prepare comments beforehand, there was the possibility that EZ could just do a normal introduction. It helped that everyone was relatively busy with club business.

EZ was walking back down the steps of the clubhouse, about to head towards the front office when he saw Aanya walking next to Chucky. The two of them were talking and EZ couldn’t help but to take on her contagious smile. He couldn’t hear what the two of them were saying but Aanya looked thoroughly amused, and knowing Chucky he had to assume it was something good. When she locked eyes with him across the yard, EZ could see her thanking Chucky before turning and heading in his direction. EZ immediately spotted the book hanging from her hand as she walked up to him.

“He seems so fun,” she nodded back over her shoulder in Chucky’s direction.

“Yea,” EZ laughed, “he’s somethin’ alright.”

EZ was too busy looking at the woman in front of him to see that Angel had seen her come onto the yard, watching intently as she walked over to his brother. Angel saw as the woman laughed at something his brother said, and for a second he really couldn’t believe that EZ had been being honest with them this whole time. Angel really thought that his little brother had just been exaggerating to get him and the rest of the club off his back.

“Looks like you’ve been working hard,” Aanya smiled as she reached up, cupping one side of his face in her hand as she thumbed a streak of dirt off his cheek with her thumb.

He felt like his skin was on fire at the contact, but he tried not to let it show, “Just trying to stay busy.”

“That makes two of us,” she laughed, “I hope you don’t mind me just popping up like this. I don’t want to intrude on everything you’ve got here.”

“You’re not intruding. If anything, you’re a very welcome distraction,” he chuckled.

“At least I’m welcome,” she smiled.

“Always,” he couldn’t stop looking at her.

The two of them stood there for a few moments before Aanya cleared her throat, remembering why she’d shown up at the scrapyard in the first place. She held the book close to her chest for a moment before handing it over to EZ.

“Just came in today, so I haven’t read it. But I read the first chapter or so while it was slow this afternoon and it seemed like something you’d enjoy.”

“I’ll be sure to write up a full report when I’m done with it,” he smiled.

“Lucky for you, I grade papers as generously as I review books,” she laughed, resting her hand against his chest. Her fingertips traced along the stitching of the leather covering his torso. Looking at his prospect patch for a moment, she looked back up at him, “Kutte.”

He laughed, nodding, “You got it.”

“It’s my one new piece of information for the week.”

“That and all the first chapters of books you’re going to be reading for the rest of the week,” he gave her a knowing look.

“Like you wouldn’t do the same thing if you worked there,” she lightly patted his chest.

“Maybe,” he rested the hand that wasn’t holding the book over hers, completely enveloping it.

“I don’t know how late you need to be here tonight, but if you want to come over later, you can.”

He raised his eyebrows, surprised by the invitation, “Yea?”

She nodded, “Yea. If you have plans with your brother or something I totally understand. Just thought I’d mention it.”

“I’ll be there,” he didn’t have plans, but even if he did he would’ve dropped everything for her, “I’ll give you a call when I leave here in case you need anything.”

“Sounds good!” she felt her heart beating a little faster in her chest, “Alright. I’ll let you get back to work. I’ll see you tonight?”

He nodded, “See you tonight.”

He was expecting her to flash him a smile and a wink before turning and walking away. But, much to his surprise, she gently cupped both sides of his face in her hands and pulled him down into a kiss. It took him a moment to really register what was going on, but once he did, he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer. He could feel the way she smiled into their kiss and in that moment, he realized that there was nothing else in the world that he’d rather do. He’d drop damn near any and everything to be able to kiss her like that all the time.

She pulled away, hands still resting on the sides of his face. She smiled as she took in the slightly dazed look on his face. Tracing her thumbs along his cheeks, she gave him a soft peck on the lips, “Bye,” she let out a quiet laugh.

It was hard to get himself to force out the one-syllable word as he stared at her. He’d never been good at taking things slow, and as he stood there looking at her, seeing the way that she was practically glowing, he knew that he was very quickly falling in love with her. He wished he knew how to articulate the way that she made him feel, but instead he settled for getting his thoughts enough to say goodbye to her until he saw her again later.

He’d offered to walk her back to her car but she waved him off, insisting that she was fine and if nothing else Chucky would gladly escort her, which EZ knew was true. He watched her as she sauntered back towards her car and he couldn’t take his eyes off of her. His fingers curled tighter around the book in his hands, pressing it against his chest.

The feeling of his phone vibrating in his pocket snapped him out of his daze. He reached into his kutte and pulled it out, sighing when he saw that Angel had sent a picture to the group chat with all the guys. Not knowing what to expect, he opened the message and saw a picture of himself and Aanya, one hand on his cheek while the other held the book. The next message was a text from Angel, one that made EZ shake his head, “Guess boy scout wasn’t lying after all. She’s real”

Before EZ could try to respond and come to his own defense, Gilly sent a message to the chat, “Still don’t buy it. I wasn’t there. Didn’t happen”

Knowing that it was just going to descend further into chaos, EZ decided he might as well play into it, “Alright. Guess you won’t care if I leave early to go and see my not real girlfriend then. See you guys tomorrow”

Angel called out to him from across the yard when he read the message, “Hey, hey. I don’t think I said all that!” Angel walked over to his brother, laughing the entire time, “Nah, nice to see she’s a real person.”

“Yea, that’s one of my favorite things about her,” EZ chuckled and shook his head, tucking the new book close to his chest.

[shirophantomvox]

Flower Pedals Hisoka x reader Part 2

Part 1

❤️♣️❤️♣️

As the day went on, Hisoka volunteered as a chaperone to your younger cousins. They wanted to play in the water while Hisoka sat under a coconut tree, sipping on a strawberry margarita. It would be pointless for an intoxicated man to be a chaperone but he is quite immune to heavy alcohol. Somehow, the sun’s beautiful reflection made Hisoka look like the man you slowly fell for. His job as a bodyguard for the most dangerous mafia in the country, his ability to speak French like a flipped switch, and of course his bulging muscles. Seeing him interact well with your cousins made him seem father-like. But why did he have to act so egotistical? Why couldn’t he be like the guys you saw on the Hallmark channel? Is being loved that hard to ask for? Then the hurtful incident earlier that day entered your mind once again. You didn’t want to break up with Hisoka but it was the only choice.

A tear ran down your face, something you hadn’t done in a while. A silent weep is something everyone needs to do once in a while but weeping in front of others can feel humiliating. Suddenly, you hear a knock on your door and someone enters without your permission. You quickly wiped your tears away and turned around quickly expecting it to be Hisoka. Instead, it was your beloved uncle smiling with a DVD in one hand and popcorn in the other but once he got a quick glimpse of your sad face, his smile disappeared. This time he didn’t run to your rescue but rather asked what’s wrong from a distance. He already knew it had to do with Hisoka but he was curious to hear more.

“Is it about your boyfriend?”

“Yes…”

“Did he hurt you?”

“Physically, no. Emotionally, yes. He has flirted with many people and disregards that I am there. He used to be all over me and now he acts as if I do not exist!”

“That’s horrible. But I have to break it to you. Some men like it when their significant others are jealous. It’s thrilling to them. If you dislike that, you should tell him.”

“I have! He will not listen to me!”

Your uncle grunted in anger and shook his head. He placed his index finger and thumb under his chin, thinking hard about something. Tears rolled from your eyes and felt like they could not stop.

“Come with me, darling.”

Following behind your uncle like a 5-year-old, he led the way to his newly renovated basement, and in that basement stood something that mimicked a lab. He removed a large blanket that covered a table full of glass test tubes and pink liquid. You were hopelessly confused as to why your uncle was smiling at his little creation.

“Uncle…what is all this?”

“Can you guess?”

“Sorry. I have no idea what it is.”

“It’s a love potion!”

You gasp and step back rather far from him. You frowned, not believing what your uncle has told you. Love potions were depicted and always fictional; they simply don’t exist. Hell, Cupid DOES NOT exist and yet he claims that he has made a love potion?! You have always known your uncle to be a wacky man but NOT THIS wacky! Not only did he have a small test tube of this love potion but he had at least 100 small bottles of it too!

“Uncle….don’t tell me…”

“Maybe Hisoka can take a shot of this…”

“U/N! No! That’s wrong!”

“Huh?”

“If he doesn’t love me anymore, I’ll break up with him. Plain and simple.”

“But y/n!-“

“No buts!”

Gosh, you sound like your aunt!

“Why do you have that anyway? I could have sworn you and auntie madly in love anyway.”

“We are….” He stopped talking for a brief moment as he made his way to the door. He did not want your aunt to overhear him speak or else she’d have his head.

“We’ve had a few tiffs lately and she is being distant. I was thinking of giving her this potion.”

“You can’t just…give her that! What if she’s allergic to any ingredient you put in there?”

“SHHH! It’s not a drug, ok darling? It’s essentially a cupid’s arrow in liquid form.”

“Oh yeah! And Santa Claus is real, right? Come on Unc. I’m going to sleep now.”

“Y/N wait! Wait!” Your uncle ran up the stairs after you to try and have an actual heart-to-heart conversation with you. In reality, The love potion wasn’t anything that would harm Hisoka or your auntie; it was something that everyone had. This “love potion” has many variants in the market already. It has its own juice, pop, and merchandise line. When people gave testimonies about them falling madly in love with their partners, you thought it was an absolute joke!

The day had reached 11 PM. The sun had set for the day and the bright stars shined brightly against the beach. Chrollo and the others had left hours ago probably forgetting that you and Hisoka had tagged along. As you cleared the dinner table, the love potion sat there, in its small slender glass frame. This had been extracted so it could be digested but still, you didn’t go anywhere near it.

“Don’t leave this unattended. If a person drinks too much, they’ll become a fool for you and as romantic as that sounds, it can be VERY overwhelming.”

As you turned the lights off downstairs, the front door barreled open. Your eyes had been adjusted to light for the last few hours; seeing in the dark was nearly impossible. But one thing is for sure, that infamous bubble gum small dashed towards your nostrils.

Hisoka.

The lights turned on once again and this time, they began to flicker a little. Hisoka’s piercing golden eyes were able to grab a hold of yours instantly. It felt like you were paralyzed with sudden fear and anger. So many emotions raged throughout your body; your brain sending many signals to the various parts of your body. Both of your cousins come running in, arms stuck out like airplanes zooming all through the living room. One flew underneath Hisoka’s legs and the other flew many times around you. Their sudden joy made you smile a little; they were so full of joy and hope…that is until they grow up.

“I like your boyfriend, y/n!”

“Yeah! He’s so fun! He taught me how to play Poker!”

“You what?!”

“Hey! She needs to know in case she needs to make some cash.”

“Ok, you two. Up to bed. Mom and Dad are waiting for you.”

Both of your cousins zoom into their rooms making loud airplane noises.

“I must admit, I see potential in those kids. They made their own marshmallows, mingled amongst people their age, and even reminded me when their bedtime was.”

He looked from the staircase to you. “Thank you for—“ he stopped as he looked at your angry face.

“—Are you still mad about earlier?”

“What do you think, jerk?”

“Would you stop playing hard to get? You haven’t given me a kiss today.” He bent down and puckered his lips, expecting you to respond. Instead, you turn the lights off leaving a kiss-less Hisoka in the dark. Hisoka stood in the middle of the dark living room beyond confused at your actions.

Finally! Alone at last. No one to interrupt your thoughts or sleep, just you in your auntie’s guest room. The bed was extra comfy! It was so fluffy that it almost made you get up and inside Hisoka to sleep with you.

“No. He needs to learn his lesson,” you thought to yourself. Besides, a non-married couple sleeping in the same bed together was NOT going to fly in this house. Before you knew it, your eyes were closed for what felt like 20 minutes but were actually 8 hours. The sun beamed through the curtains acting as your silent alarm clock. Stretching your muscles and yawing felt amazing after a good night’s sleep. Checking your phone was a reflex but feeling an odd source of shadows made you freeze. As you slowly turned around, Hisoka was laying in your bed, with his boxers on, smiling, and gawking at you; something he’d never done. You thought rubbing your eyes twice would make him go away, but he was still there in the flesh. Still angry about yesterday's encounter, you stare at him plainly.

“What in the world are you doing here, Hisoka?”

“To be with you, of course, my dear.” His tone was much softer; it felt as if he was barely moving his tongue. His lips slightly puckered as he spoke. Your boyfriend was always mysterious but it can be said that he was never predictable.

“What are you talking about?”

He scoots closer to you; his bare chest rubbing against your right arm. He places his left arm around your neck pulling you closer. So close that you could feel the heat radiating from his body. He took his index knuckle, placed it under your chin, and lifted.

“Oh, how I missed your face…the sound of your voice…my heart aches for you.”

You blink twice.

Am I dreaming? What is going on here?!

“Hisoka—“

He placed his index finger over your lips; his long nail gently scratches the top part. “Shhh….” Quickly but softly, Hisoka gives you a kiss but not just an ordinary kiss, one that is very breathtaking. His lips were much softer than you remember and a lot moister. He didn’t force anything; he gently moved his lips to make you more comfortable. What felt like a lifetime was truly only 10 seconds and on the 11th, he parted. Gazing into his golden eyes this time made your heart skip a beat. You remained silent, slightly afraid to say a word as he stared into your eyes deeply. This was not his blood-lust look at all but awfully similar. His eyes were half-lidded but they were soft, much softer than you had seen before. Just as you were about to say something, he gently grabs your face and begins to kiss you all around without remorse. This overwhelming amount of affection not only made you bluff but be utterly embarrassed if your aunt and uncle caught you two in this state. It’s more of the family “aww’ ing” than anything else.

“How did Hisoka suddenly do a 360 from last night?”

“Might as well enjoy this while it lasts.”

Hisoka continued to place soft kisses. He began to pepper your lower jaw with them, earning a slightly satisfied grunt from yourself. He then professed his love for you as he kissed you in between phrases. The magician himself was as red as an apple while you were a giggling mess. He moved his lips to another part of your body. His hand kisses felt amazing once more. He moved his way up your arm and to your shoulder.

“You smell terrific, kitten,” he said in a lower huskier voice.

You growl in response; something so embarrassing that you are happy your nosy little cousins did not hear.

“You’re so adorable, kitten. So delicate that I’d be afraid to touch. So beautiful like the colors and aroma omitting from a blossom tree.”

“I love you to the moon and back.”

Before Hisoka said another word, he placed his right hand where the bottom of your head and neck met. He gently caressed it as he pressed his forehead against yours. The soft feeling of his nose moving swiftly against yours felt like ecstasy. Nothing could ruin this moment.

“Hisoka’s a simp!”

Both of you jerked your heads to the door. Through the crack, you could see two curious pairs of eyes, staring into your room. Before Hisoka could leave the bed, you jump over him and march to the door.

“You know, it’s rude to stalk people in their bedrooms.”

“And? It’s rude for you to be staying the night in my beach house and not giving us any money. Hand it over sis.”

You close the door and jump back into bed with your new boyfriend. Hisoka practically had hearts in his eyes. It’s as if he saw no one but you.

Maybe he has changed….

Your uncle’s voice could be heard a distance away and that’s when it hit you.

“Don’t leave this unattended. If a person drinks too much, they’ll become a fool for you and as romantic as that sounds, it can be VERY overwhelming.”

Oh shit! Where is the potion?! No! It was left on the table last night!”

"Really, Unc? I think I can deal with this. After all, he is less insufferable. I’ve always wanted my beau back and I hope he remains this way…falling on his knees before me."

To be continued....

[cryingoverafictionalcharacter]

Sunrise

Prompt: Y/N has chronic nightmares, and one night after having a particularly bad one, Bucky comes to comfort them, leading to the realization that they have a lot more in common than they thought.

A/N: Am I writing this because I genuinely had the worst nightmare of my life, and wanted this to happen instead of staring at the door for two hours, too afraid to move until the sun came up? That's a secret I’ll never tell ;)

Warnings: Swearing, scared reader, sad Bucky, cute fluffy shit

Feel free to send me any requests you may have, I’m on a writing frenzy because homework makes me sad haha.

The hallway seemed to go on forever, taking much longer to get to the kitchen than usual. I had heard a sound down the hall, and went to investigate. The lights above my head flickered, causing the hair on the back of my neck to stand up, but I kept walking. As I walked I called out to FRIDAY.

“FRIDAY is there anyone awake in the tower?” I asked, but there wasn’t a reply, only the sound of the lights of my heads buzzing on and off as they failed to work correctly.

Finally, after what felt like hours, I entered the kitchen. It was dark, the only light coming from the city lights outside, allowing me to see a silhouette of a person. It was Bucky, his back facing towards me. At first I was relived to see I wasn’t the only one awake, but something about him was off. He was completely stiff, like he was frozen in place.

“Bucky?” I asked, making my way around him to look at his face. I finally reached his left, able to see the side of his face clearly, and as soon as I did my stomach dropped. 

His eyes were wide with fear, his face pale, he was looking out the window, like he was looking at something. I had been on dozens of missions with Bucky before and I had never seen him so scared in my life. I opened my mouth to say his name again, but he spoke before I could.

“They’re here” He whispered, barely loud enough for me to hear.

“Whos here?” I asked. Bucky didn’t answer, just pointed out the window. I followed his finger, looking out the compound to see nothing. Were were a few stories up, and we could see the rest of the city below us.

“There's nothing there-” I started turning back to face him to be met with someone else completely. A dark figure, like a shadow standing in the place Bucky just stood. Before I could make a sound, the figure pulled back its arm, burring a knife in my chest.

I jolted awake, sitting upright and grabbing the knife that I kept on my nightstand, holding it out as I looked around room, my eyes adjusting to the dark. I could seethe chair sitting on the other side of the room, my dresser, and the door to the bathroom, just slightly ajar.

“There's nothing there” I whispered to myself, trying to shake myself out of my panicked state, but I couldn’t look away from the door. I focused my breath, trying to slow it, all the while listening as hard as I could, waiting for something, anything. The room was completely silent, and I was just about to lay back down when I heard a sound from the door, causing me to scream and jump out of bed, running to the opposite side of the room, my knife pointed at the sound, now coming from my front door.

“Y/N?” I heard on the other side of the door, before it suddenly swung open, revealing Bucky on the other side. He quickly flicked the light switch on the wall, revealing me standing opposite of him, drenched in a cold sweat, and pointing a knife at him.

“Oh, hi Bucky” I sighed as the light came on, being able to clearly see Bucky's face in the light. My heart was still beating a million miles a minute, but I was finally able to drop my knife to my side and focus on trying my breath.

“Is everything ok? I heard you scream” Bucky said, still on the defensive with his fists raised as he looked around the room.

“Yeah um... yeah sorry, I just had a... I thought you were something else” I said, hesitating on whether or not to tell him the truth about my dream. I decided against it, not wanting him to think I was childish, being afraid of monsters in the closet, or bathroom in this case.

Bucky looked at me for a while, taking in my still panicked state, before dropping his hands to his sides. 

“Want to talk about it?” He asked softly, like a was an animal that might spook if he was too loud. I looked at him, his hair was a little messy, and he was still in a T-shirt and shorts, but he didn’t look too tired, like he had been awake for a while.

I don’t know why, but I didn’t want him to leave, so I nodded, allowing him to walk in to the room fully, closing the door behind him. I walked to the far side of the bed, sitting and patting the space next to me, which he took. There was a few beats of silence, before he finally spoke.

“I heard you from across the hall” Bucky started as I stared down at the floor. “It sounded like you were tossing around, like you were having a nightmare” 

“It was” I said, still not meeting his eyes, but I could feel his on me, watching for a reaction.

“Want to talk about it?” He asked, causing me to shake my head.

“Its stupid” I said, before suddenly feeling a hand under my chin, gently making me look into Bucky's eyes. There was no judgement, just worry.

“If it scared you enough to act like this, I promise it’s not stupid” He said gently.

I contemplated whether or not to tell him. Bucky and I weren’t exactly best friends, but we were close. We had some missions together, and the occasional movie night. Some back and forth flirting but nothing ever happened.

I was too scared to let anything happen.

“I was going out into the kitchen to get something” I started, before jumping straight into my dream, how real it all felt, how scared he looked. The whole time he just listened quietly , nodding to let me know he was actively listening without interrupting. He listened all the way to the end, when I was stabbed by the shadow like creature. 

There was a beat of silence, before he spoke up.

“Did you think it was here?” He asked, referring to earlier when I was pointing a knife at him with crazy eyes.

“I don’t know” I said honestly. I knew he wasn’t going to make fun of me, so I didn’t feel scared to tell him the truth.

“When I woke up... the bathroom door was open. And I kept thinking to myself that I knew there wasn’t anything on the other side. But still. I wasn’t sure.” I finished, looking to see Bucky nodding in understanding.

“I have nightmares a lot” Bucky started, making me look up at him “Its always the same. I’m still the winter soldier, and I’m re living everything I had done. Everyone I hurt. Over and over again, with no control of my body...” He trailed off. It was his turn to refuse to meet my gaze, staring at the floor. 

I gently put both of my hands on the sides of his face, making him look at me this time.

“You didn’t do those things” I started “The winter soldier did. And you aren’t him” He nodded, covering one of my hands with his own.

“I know, it just feels so real sometimes” He said, causing me to nod in understanding. Its crazy how easy it is for your brain to trick you into thinking that the things you’re most afraid of are real.

“So” Bucky said, brining my hands off his face so he could hold them in his own. “You were dreaming about me?” A small smile spreading across his face.

“Oh shut it” I laughed, smacking him on the shoulder, the weight of the panic I was feeling earlier finally leaving my body. 

“You know, I have an idea that might help to make you feel better, if you want” Bucky said, waiting for a reaction.

I looked over at my clock. It was six in the morning. It didn’t really make sense to go back to sleep at this point, so I nodded, making Bucky to smile, before taking my hand and leading me out of my room.

We got into the elevator and took it all the way to the top of the tower. I had never been to the very top, assuming it was just the roof of the building, which it was, but I wasn’t expecting what was up there.

When we got off the elevator, and opened the door to the outside, I took in the sight in front of me. There was a single couch, facing the east, with a pergola adorned with fairy lights overhead, which happened to be on.  

“Its not much” Bucky started, walking over to the couch, me following behind. “Tony was planning on making a social area up here, but it never got finished because he didn’t really need it, but he let me keep this stuff up here.” 

We made our way to the couch and sat side by side. The sun was just starting to come up, and the entire city was beginning to turn a light yellow.

“This is amazing Bucky”  I said, looking aver the city as it slowly came awake. “Thank you... for everything” I turned to face him to see he was already looking at me, a gentle smile on his face.

Bucky and I had known each other for years, and I had liked him for most of that time. He was sweet, and funny, and kind. He knew when to joke around and when to be more serious. And he has always had my back. Now, all those years of passive flirting, and movie nights, and missions almost gone bad had lead to this exact moment, and I was able to realize just how head over heels I was for him. 

Bucky had put his arm around me, and was absentmindedly playing with my hair. Without thinking, I finally closed the distance between us and kissed him. 

It didn’t take him any time to respond. The hand in my hair moved to cup the side of my face, the other moving to my waist, and I moved to wrap my arms around his neck, bringing him even closer.

He pulled away for a second, causing me to frown. Had I taken things to far to fast? Was he second guessing himself about this? I looked in his face and was met with nothing but love in his eyes.

“I’ve been waiting a while to do that” He said smiling.

“Well technically I kissed you so...” I said jokingly, causing him to roll his eyes before reconnecting out lips again. This kiss was quicker, but it still gave me butterflies.

“As nice as this is” Bucky started, breaking the kiss to look at me “I brought you up here to see the sunrise” He said, causing me to smile.

“That's true” I said, moving so I could lean my head on his shoulder and look out on the sky line, the sun already much higher than it was before, painting the city in a dark orange. “But were defiantly starting where we left off” I joked, causing a goofy smile to cross his face.

“I wouldn’t want it any other way” He said, resting his head on top of mine.

_________________________________________________________

AHHHHHH I suck at finishing these but I hope it was ok! Not as much fluff as I would have liked but I just went with what felt natural (I’m still new at writing so yeah lol). Also this story was entirely written for me bc nightmares are ass and I want Bucky to hold me! Either way I hope you enjoyed, and hopefully my grammar isn't to bad. :)

[redbirdbella]

@clintasha-week  Advent calendar Day 9 - Emotions 

Very angsty. CW - guns, illusions to suicide, Avengers Assemble canon character death, drug use, talk of mind control. (If there's any more please tell me but those are the ones i can see.)

It takes Natasha 45 minutes to decide Clint's been alone long enough.

It takes two weeks for her to find him.

Phil's funeral had been tough on everyone, her archer especially. He'd been a broken man, tears staining his cheeks as he carried the casket. Natasha to his left, holding his hand as she helps bear the weight.

Barton, Romanoff, Rogers, Hill, Fury and May carrying the weight of a brother, a comrade and a true patriot July 1964 til May 2012 (or at least that's what the grave will say).

She gives him space, room to grieve, to bury his head into his hands and weep until shes worried he'll shrivel up. Like he'll faint from dehydration like when he was hungover that one time in Vegas. Happier times. Hill supplies the tissues and Steve the rousing speech. It's tasteful, Phil would appreciate it. But there's no flowers to hide the casket, just his stupid Captain America trading cards on, the ones that make Natasha's heartbreak.

Clint asks for space. After it's all over, once the coffins gone behind the red velvet curtains and the music plays. She agrees, resigned to him running. She can play the game. Follow where he leads.

Two weeks. Two damn weeks it takes. Europe, the Americas, Africa. She even checks in with Barney. The infamous Hawkeye is gone with the wind.

She goes on a whim. On a shadow of a memory of Tokyo. Of him stitching her up. Of safety and warm alcohol. A disconnected safehouse. Off the grid. Shelter, nothing more.

It's not there, replaced by a luxury high-rise. Last few units remaining the realtor declares. Great, he'll be near the top then.

She hacks the database. It's easy enough. Flat 804.

It's quiet. Eerily so, and she prays to whatever deity will listen to not have another funeral so soon.

She knocks hard, demanding a reply, but she's no surprised when no one answers.

Simple locks make simple work, the door creaking open in spite of her pleas for quiet.

He's up and in the doorway. He's armed, fingers gripping to his old Glock. Simple, effective but not if he looks so indecisive. Like its somehow difficult choosing between the intruder and himself.

"Clint" She whispers, pressing a kiss to the side of his mouth letting his stubble scratch against her, "It's ok. Just me."

"Tasha" he breathes, taking her head into his hands. She holds them, noticing the way they shake, the way it makes it easy to dispossess him. Too easy. She notices the razor burn on his cheeks like he'd tried, tried to find himself amongst the rubble, "He's- I'm- I've fought so hard Tasha"

"I know, you've been so brave, but you don't have to be. I'm here, together yeah?"

He nods, letting her push her way into the apartment. The way she moves past the bottle piles and cracked walls with an effortless grace ignoring the smell of BO and alcohol. The lingering stench of rock bottom.

"Let's get you clean huh?"

He nods leading her to the bathroom. The flat has a bath graciously untouched and running hot water that leaves Natasha whispering a silent thank you to the powers that be.

She's well packed, well versed in Clint and all his emergencies. Magnesium enriched Epsom salts with lavender and chamomile, to soothe his sores and the anxious energy in his muscles. Clint recognises the box and nods reluctantly.

"Want to put some in?"

He doesn't, but he doesn't stop her adding a healthy amount. He strips down without her request, he isn't scared of being naked. Not with her. She's seen worse. She's seen the bodies on the floor, even helped organise the men that had taken Phil away, leaving the red smudge that seemed to imprint into his mind.

"Hey" She whispers kindly as if the past didn't hang so heavy between them "the water should be warm enough now. Go on, it won't bite"

He nods and steps in, if only to see her smile his last connection to humanity reflected back to him.

"Should we lay down?" She asks but she's already slowly lowering herself letting her arm dangle into the water.

He follows her. A little less steady but it's a start. She kisses his head, "Whatever you're on its strong"

Clint shrugs. Not strong enough.

"How long?"

"How long?" Natasha echos "long enough that I've missed you"

"No, how long in here?"

"Until I say so"

There's no quip just a nod and Natasha's heart breaks just a little more. She clings to the outside of the bath under his watchful gaze, humming songs she remembers from better times. Before gods and monsters and mayhem.

It takes a while for the salts to work their magic, making his limbs grow heavier, back to his control. The bath should be cool, if Natasha hadn't constantly refilled bringing it back to a good temperature. The one that melts the trickster god's ice.

"There, I've got something to get you dry" She whispers when he stands, requesting to be let out. She'd got it at the airport, so it's still fluffy with its new novel smell. He wraps it around his waist and she throws his clothes into the water left in the tub. Cleaning the air of the smell and giving him no choice but to choose the fresh clothes she's brought. He agrees to the pants, black with a purple stripe out the outside leg, the pair he always wore for long nights in.

"That's better" Natasha praises, directing him to the toilet, seat down, "you tried to shave-"

"I look like him" oh the original him. Barton Snr. The only man she hated more than Loki.

"I only see my partner" she whispers pressing another kiss to his cheek, "let me show you-"

She brings out a kit. A long-forgotten kit, one that only comes out for him. Her Barbers kit from her time attending to the soldiers. It's not the same, her tools had been blunted through use but the idea is still there. Buried deep through countless repetition.

Clints not like the soldiers. Even now he fidgets putting himself at her mercy. It's a long process, a Turkish shave, but each time it's worth it for the way he smiles, blushing under her tender touches. It's different this time, there's no more smiles but he shuts his eyes letting himself be pampered.

"There." She whispers placing a mirror into his hands once the act is done "There you are. Back again"

He nods, avoiding the man that glances back at him and she places her hands against the back of his neck.

"You cant ever ask for space again"

He nods.

"Not until I say so"

He nods. He's taken something, something strong. Detoxing will be a bitch but that was tomorrows battle.

"Bed?"

He doesn't nod, but he doesn't object either just leads her there as if she just wanted to see it. To check for proof of its existence.

There's no more fresh sheets, but the spare bedrooms untouched. Natasha's doubt's he'd left the living room much, not in this state.

He lays on the bed and waits for her to follow. Then he surrounds her, hands desperate to touch, to reassure his trembling grip on reality.

"I'm here. I'm here" she soothes

"You've been here before" he counters.

"Not like tonight"

He's quiet until he can't contain anymore "They took my mind"

"And I took it back"

"I killed him.

"Loki killed him. You were with me"

He nods, "You would have saved him."

"I made my choice"

"It wasn't your choice to make!"

They settle into the silence that follows. She doesn't expect an apology, she doesn't need one. She knew what it was like for someone to take your brain and play.

"Did you really think I wouldn't know you? That I wouldn't come looking" She whispers "I fought a god for you."

"And do you like your prize?"

"Now you sound like him"

"Cause he's still in there! I'd blow a hole in my head to let him out! to make it stop!"

"Don't- I need you" She's not beyond pleading, not for Clint.

He's quiet, until the tears come. They burn his freshly shaved skin so she stems them, blotting them out with her fingers.

"I'm here, it's ok" she's writing cheques she can't cash, making promises she can't keep "It can stop now, let me take it from here"

She offers out her arms as he'd done all those years before. His arms were bigger. It wasn't such a tight fit but her skills lay elsewhere. She lets her hands creep down his bareback. Recalling every last detail she can remember about her massage class back in Russia, when they'd promised her only gentle hands could wiggle out secrets. Before they corrected the lie.

He startles as she begins, if the sobs that shudder against her shoulder are any indication.

She shhs him, cradling him like a child

"It's just me"

She draws circles against his back, letting him strain away when she touches somewhere tender.

"Please, please don't fight me like you do him"

She lets her own tears slip away as he surrenders to her touch, feeling each muscle relax against her.

Until he surrenders to the deep sleep that pulls him under.

There's no more need to fight, for she grants him rest.

[adie-dee]

Your OC’s Backstory December Special

Yep, my entry is 5 days late, but I’m just happy I got it done. I’m also posting all four prompts in one post, as I wrote 2000 words total.

This is from before Bethany was cursed. For those who have read my previous backstory pieces, Bethany’s brother Harrison is no longer a baby. Instead, he’s now her adult older brother. She still finds him dead a few months before she’s cursed, though

HOME

My pink crayon was missing.

I searched through the drawing room, trying really hard to find it, as without it I couldn’t finish my picture.

“Are you meant to be in here?” Harrison asked just as I stuck my head under the sofa. 

“No,” I replied, sitting back up. “But I needed to do some drawings and this is the drawing room and I’ve lost my pink crayon!”

“It’s a different type of drawing in ‘drawing room’,” he said with a smile.

“Daddy said that too, but I don’t understand!” I whined. If it was really just a living room, why didn’t they call it that? 

Harrison kneeled down at the coffee table. “So what are you drawing?”

“It’s our house,” I said, joining him. “And that’s Mummy, and Daddy, and you, and me!” I pointed to each bit as I spoke. “But I need my pink crayon to finish Mummy’s garden and I can’t find it!”

“And what about this?” He pointed at a scratch on the table.

I covered it with my drawing, which he immediately removed.

“It was an accident,” I mumbled. “But I can fix it.”

I didn’t understand why Harrison laughed when I picked up my brown crayon.

“Allow me,” he said, taking it from me. He placed his hand on the scratch and whispered something magical, and when he lifted his hand the scratch was gone. 

“Wow!” I wished I could do magic, but Mummy said I didn’t have the spark. “Can you use it to find my crayon?”

“I don’t have that kind of magic,” he told me. “But why do you need the pink? The picture looks finished to me.”

I looked at the drawing again. It was obviously not finished, why did he think it was? “The flowers are missing,” I said slowly.

“Oh. Well, could you do orange flowers? Or red? Purple, maybe?”

“That is a good idea!” I picked up the purple crayon and added in the flowers, then handed the picture to Harrison. “This is for you. For when you leave so you don’t forget me.”

“What makes you think I’m leaving?”

“I heard you,” I mumbled. “When you were on the phone--”

“In my room,” he finished for me. “Which is eavesdropping. Hasn’t Dad told you that’s a bad thing to do?”

I thought for a moment. “Yes. Five times,” I said, holding up five fingers.

“Well you don’t need to worry: I’ll be back a lot. And I’m not going to forget you!” He hugged me. “How could I ever forget my baby sis? Especially with this amazing artwork.” He held it up again. 

“It’s upside down,” I giggled, turning it. “See?”

“Ah yes, I see now.” He stared at it a moment longer. “This needs to be our secret though, ok? I won’t be moving until next year, and I haven’t told anyone I’m going yet.”

I did a big nod. “I can keep a secret!”

“We both know that’s not true.”

“I can keep your secrets!” I corrected. “And when I’m grown up I can live with you too! And our home won’t have rules about eating vegetables. Or making my bed every day. And I can have a drawing room of my own!”

“Sounds good, kiddo,” Harrison said, cleaning up my crayons. “Now let's get out of here before Mum finds us and you get in trouble again.”

HOLIDAY

Dear Diary,

Last night was the shortest night of the year! 

We had a party to celebrate, and Mummy and Daddy didn’t even make me go to bed at seven. I got to stay up all night! 

There was lots of yummy foods that I got to eat that I don’t normally get to eat, like jelly babies and cake and ice cream, and Harrison even gave me something called cordial, which is like a lolly but it’s a drink! I wanted to taste what he was drinking too but he said it was grownup cordial and I wouldn’t like it. 

I got to play with other kids too which was really really fun! And I didn’t even get in trouble when I got dirt on my dress from when Brett threw it at me.

After everyone went home, me and Mummy and Daddy and Harrison took the stairs behind the gate up to the roof. Daddy called it a puppet, I think. It was a nice flat bit on the edge of the roof with a wall around it, and we were up there to wait for the sun to rise! I didn’t have to go to bed at all!

I fell asleep anyway, even though I tried real hard. But then Harrison woke me up and I got to see the sunrise, and WOW! The sky was orange and yellow and pink and it was so pretty.

I’m really really tired now. I even fell asleep at the breakfast table and had to clean milk off my face, which made Daddy laugh and Mummy frown. Harrison wasn’t there but he would have laughed too. 

Mummy has put me to bed and wants me to have a nap. And I will, diary, I will, but not before I tell you a secret. I found the bag of jelly babies and hid it in my dollhouse. I don’t get many lollies so they’re my secret and I’m going to eat them all.

Once I have my nap. Night, Diary!

GIFT

Bethany…

I pulled the blanket over my head, hoping that was enough to make the monster go away. 

Bethany…

The monster started scratching on the floorboards too and I pressed my hands to my ears. “Go away!” I yelled, the way Mummy and Daddy had told me to. “Daddy says you have to!”

BETHANY!

My mattress jumped under me, making me scream. I stood up on my bed and did my biggest jump, but I landed closer to the bed than I wanted to.

I’m going to get you!

I screamed again and ran for my bedroom door, pulling it open and running down the hallway until I reached Mummy and Daddy’s room. 

“Daddy daddy daddy!” I yelled, banging on the door. “The monster won’t go away!”

As soon as the door opened I ran into their room and threw myself on their bed. 

“Can I sleep here?” I asked Daddy, “Pleasssseeeee? I told the monster to go away and he didn’t listen and I’m scared!!” 

“The monster cannot hurt you,” Mummy said, joining Daddy at the door. “He will leave if you ignore him. Now please, Beth, go back to bed.”

I burst into tears. “But he’s scary!”

Daddy sighed and sat on the bad next to me. “What did you say to it?” He asked. 

“That… that… that you said he had to go away!”

“Oh Beth,” Daddy said with a small smile. “You have to tell him you don’t want him there. Then he will leave you alone.”

“But what if he doesn’t listen?!”

“He is trying to scare you, nothing more. As your mother says, he will not harm you. I promise. Do you believe me?”

Still crying, I nodded.

Daddy lifted me off the bed and carried me to the door. “Run along to bed, princess,” he said, putting me down. “We will talk more in the morning.”

I dawdled down the hallway, wanting to be anywhere but in my room.

Suddenly, a large monster appeared at the end of the hall and I screamed again.

“Bethany!” The monster yelled, stepping out of the shadows.

I started to giggle. That wasn’t a monster, it was Harrison. The monster never came out from under my bed, anyway.

“What are you doing up?” He asked me.

I told him about the monster.

“Wait here,” he said, then disappeared into his room. When he returned, he was holding a brown teddy bear. “I bought you this,” he said, handing it to me. “I was going to give him to you earlier, but you were already in bed when I came home.”

The teddy bear was soft and fluffy and cuddly, and I hugged him to my face. 

“This is a very special bear,” Harrison continued, crouching down next to me. “I gave him magic. So when the monsters make you scared, just hold him tight and he’ll make them go away.”

“Really?”

“Really really.”

I beamed at him. “Thank you!”

“But he needs a name.”

I looked at the bear again. Mummy had told me names were important, and I wanted to make sure I got it right. “Boris!” I announced. 

“Boris it is.” Harrison ruffled my hair then stood up. “Come on, kiddo, let’s get you back into bed.”

“Why aren’t you in bed?” I asked. He was still in his daytime clothes too, which was strange.

“Because I’m a grownup.”

“Mummy and Daddy are grownups too.”

He picked me up and smiled. “They’re old grownups,” he said, carrying me back to my room. “And grownups can go to bed whenever they want.”

“I can’t wait to be a grownup!”

“It’s a long way away.” He tucked me into bed. “Goodnight, Bethany.”

“Night, Harrison.”

He pulled the door closed behind him.

Bethany…

I hugged Boris tight, just like Harrison told me to. “Go away!”

The monster didn’t reply. 

NEW YEAR

A hand touched my shoulder. 

“Boris!” I cried, hugging him tight. The monster was back, he was going to grab me and eat me and—

“Bethany,” a voice hissed, clearly not that of the monster. 

“Harrison!”

“Shh!” He switched on my bedside light. “I want to show you something,” he whispered, “but you have to promise not to tell anyone.”

“I can do that,” I said, sitting up. “I haven’t told anyone you’re leaving. I nearly told Daddy but I didn’t.”

He held his pinky out to me. “Pinkie swear?”

“Pinky swear,” I repeated, hooking mine onto his. “Now can I see?”

“Yes. But get your slippers.”

Holding Boris tight I jumped out of bed and ran over to my wardrobe. My slippers were nowhere to be seen so I pulled on my gumboots instead. I liked my gumboots. They weren’t boring colours like all the clothes Mummy bought me; instead they were pink and purple and had flashing lights in the bottoms. Harrison always got me nice things, and wearing them with my nightie made me feel like a princess.

“Can you be quiet in those?” he asked once I came out of my wardrobe. “We don’t want anyone to hear.”

I replied with a big nod.

He led me out of my room and into the drawing room, pausing to pick up one of my crayons off the floor. “Cover your eyes,” he whispered.

I did as he asked, and heard something go click.

When I uncovered them, the back of the fireplace was missing, and there was a rickety staircase instead.

I almost squealed with excitement. A secret passage! 

Harrison ducked into the fireplace and I followed him, climbing the stairs, and suddenly we were on the roof. 

But not the nice flat part where I got to watch the sunrise. This bit was steep and covered in thick red tiles.

“Why are we--”

Harrison shushed me again. “Mum and Dad are on the parapet,” he whispered, pointing to where the nice bit was. “They wanted you to stay in bed but you’re five now, and a big girl, and I wanted you to see.”

“See what?” 

Just as I spoke there was a big explosion overhead, one made of purple and green sparkles. Then red, and blue, and silver. Some were big circles and others shot up like rockets, and even the bridge was covered in sparkles. It was so pretty. Not as pretty as the sunrise, but still really really pretty.

Harrison picked me up and I reached out, trying to catch the falling lights.

“Happy new year,” he whispered.

Suddenly I gasped. “Does this mean you’re leaving me now?” I don’t want you to go!” Tears formed in my eyes and I rubbed my face onto his shoulder to wipe them away.

“Not yet. I have a few more things to organise, so I’ll be here for the rest of summer. And when it’s time, you’ll be the first to know.”

[98prilla]

Fallen

A03

Logan falls from heaven. Instead of dying, he finds aid from a familiar face.

...

He’s falling.

 Crashing, really.

 Through the atmosphere, through plains of reality, he’s broken the sound barrier, and he wonders if he’ll ever hit the ground. At this point, he wishes he would, just so the anticipation would be over.

 His wings burn and tear and scorch at the edges from the force of the fall. Feathers fly around him, not that they’ll cushion his eventual landing. He can see them blackening at the edges, the wind ripping them to shreds, and it hurts, oh, it hurts.

 But he’s numb. Passive. Apathetic, he supposes, is the best word, because what else can he be? There’s no way to stop this, no way to change it, the only thing he can do is give in, and hope that the ground snaps his neck on impact. Otherwise, it will be a slow, painful death.

 He would pray for mercy, but there’s not much use for prayer, now.

 God won’t answer him.

…

His breath escapes him, his heart stops beating, everything freezes for a just a moment, and it takes his brain a second to catch up with his body, for the agonizing, burning, endless waves of pure excruciation to hit his pain receptors, and he chokes on the torment in his soul.

 He tries to move, to sit, to crawl, but he can’t even twitch his fingers, even that burns with the heat of a thousand stars, sends him reeling into a darkness that swallows him whole, and he doesn’t know how long it’s been, when he wakes, days or hours, but the pain hasn’t diminished.

 He’s almost grateful he can’t seem to turn his head, because he can’t bear to see the state of his wings, he knows it’s a bad sign that he can’t feel anything at all from them, meaning more than likely they go beyond broken to unsalvageable, and that more than anything breaks him down into a howling, wretched, mess.

 He painted the sky, he placed the stars, he wove the cosmos into being, and now he can’t even touch them. Will die here, on this rock hurtling through space, without ever touching his stars again.

 And for what?

 A couple questions? His curiosity? His desire to discover everything and anything and how it all worked, and why it all worked, and somehow, somehow, that was blasphemy, when it should have been considered the purest kind of love, that he wanted to know the humans better, know their world better, well.

 He can feel blood trickling from his mouth, though he doesn’t know if it’s from internal injuries or simply because at some point in the fall he bit his tongue. He’s too tired to care. He’s cold, as well, an unusual feeling, it was never cold in heaven. Even now, his sluggish mind is trying to process the new feeling, trying to determine the consequences, trying to understand, but it was slow.

 Everything feels slow.

 He barely notices the vibrations against the ground, the footsteps approaching, until the shadow is hovering over him. He barely hears the person whistle lowly. Barely manages to open his eyes for a fleeting second, as he feels himself be moved, picked up, held, and he instinctually presses against the warmth.

 “Something did a number on you, didn’t it?” The voice murmurs, rumbling in their chest, a soothing feeling, another thing to catalogue. But he’s already slipping away, as some small movement tweaks his wing joints, and he screams at the electric anguish it sends racing through his veins.

…

Warm.

 He is warm.

 His entire being pulses with a dull, endless ache. His soul feels ripped to shreds. His heart feels shattered beyond repair.

 Yet he’s alive.

 The world is a blur. Warm browns and dark woods, something soft and gentle beneath him. Something fluffy and warm wrapped around him. He can feel something wrapped around his chest, something pinning his wings back, trapped and he hisses, tries to pull at the restraints, tries to get free, tries to escape-

 “Hey, hey, hey, don’t do that.” He freezes at that voice, a blurry shape coming into view, black hair with a white streak, and he recoils, afraid, breath hissing through his teeth at the ache sharpening to a stabbing in his skull. “Sorry, sorry, it’s okay, but, uh, you really need to leave the bandages and stuff alone. One of my friends fixed you all up, I don’t know shit about healing and stuff, but he said if you ever wanna use those again, you gotta let ‘em heal.” His breath hitches at that, and his focus didn’t sharpen, but the ache in his heart did.

 “they’re broken. they shattered on impact. Based on my velocity, into a thousand tiny pieces of bone fragments that can’t ever be pieced back together. Not only that, the flesh itself tore apart from the speed and the crash, I can’t feel them. They’re nothing more than useless weights to drag along behind me. I won’t fly again. Don’t lie to me. I’ve already lost everything, don’t lie to me.” His voice is dull and emotionless, his spark is dimmed to an ember, he doesn’t have anything left in him.

 “I’m not. I swear, they’re not a lost cause. It won’t be fast, or soon, but he said that you’ll be able to fly again. He’s, uh, not really a human, so, he used some of his voodoo magic or whatever, and it seems to have stuck.” He’s too tired to try and parse out whatever that means, but a kernel of hope is soothing the ache, now, because if he can fly, that’s all he needs, he just needs his wings, and he’ll be able to make it. He just needs the stars.

…

 He’s crying.

 He doesn’t know why, but tears are slipping down his cheeks, still half dreaming.

 He hadn’t thought it would be Patton, who would turn him in. Didn’t think he’d done anything worthy of being turned in for, which was why he hadn’t been afraid. Even as he was standing in front of the council, explaining himself, he hadn’t been afraid.

 He’d thought it all a misunderstanding.

 Until the clouds parted under him, and sent him hurtling down.

 Until Patton said he was sorry, but this was for everyone’s own good.

 Until he reached desperately up, expecting someone, anyone, to grab his hand, haul him back up, to say this was wrong, or all a joke, but instead his grasp closed on air, and he fell.

 He’s fallen.

 That doesn’t hurt. Not really. It’s the betrayal that hurts. That twists like a knife in his side, that stabs him through the heart and breaks him, because how long, how long, how long, had Patton been planning this?

 He’d thought Patton was curious, like him, he always listened so attentively, always asked questions, the only one who actually cared about his speculations and interests and studies.

 And it had all been a lie.

 It would make him angry, if he had anything left in him besides tired, down trodden, defeat.

 He should have been smarter than this. He knows how pure Patton sees himself, sees the other angels, sees heaven. He knows how he looks for corruption everywhere, how he supported the flood, but he’d just been glad someone wanted to listen.

 And it cost him.

 “-been sleeping.”

 “Still, I’d like to check on him. Those wounds need redressing.” A new voice, soft and sibilant, soft voice, one he almost recognized, almost remembered, but his memories seem blurry on the subject.

 He cracks open his eyes as footsteps approach, the room slightly less blurry, now, he supposes some of the swelling on his face must have gone down, allowing his eyes to open fully.  

 A face comes into view. One half is covered with golden scales, that trail down from his eyes and extend down his wrist, encasing his hands in their soft shimmer, one eye a snake’s, the other a dark, nearly coal, black, and there’s something strange and graceful and ageless about him.

 “serpent.” He greets, voice rasping and whispery, and he sees the figure inhale sharply, take a step back.

 “logan. Oh, stars, what did they do to you?” He isn’t sure how the serpent knows his name, but he doesn’t care. His eyes are slipping shut and he doesn’t have the strength to keep them open anymore, he doesn’t care what happens to him, he just wants to sleep and never wake up. “Shhh, it’ll be ok, love. Jussst sssleeep.”

….

Remus watches as Deceit smooths back the winged man’s hair, Logan, he’d said, a strange look on his face, a strange combination of anger and fierce softness.

 “You know him.” He says, and Deceit lets out a soft sigh, running a hand through his hair.

 “I know all of them, Remus. I was there when they were made.”

 “But you know him, personally.” Deceit’s shoulders tense, but he doesn’t answer, instead shifting his attention back to Logan.

 “He’ll be out for a while. He’s exhausted as is, and my influence will keep him that way long enough to do what needs to be done. I’d rather he not be awake, it’s going to hurt considerably rebandaging and preening those wings. You might want to lay down a tarp. This will get messy.”

…

 He remembers something.

 Distant, hazy, broken pieces of thoughts.

 Painting the stars, laughing at something someone else said, someone with a golden glow and long brown locks, hazel eyes alit with the cosmos.

 Speaking beneath a tree, well, more of an idea of a tree, a conceptualization of a tree, a fuzzy, hesitant painting of one. They are mapping the sky, planning it out, tracing future constellations.

 Patton. Sky blue wings, ripping away the gold. For his own good. Too many questions, too many doubts, too many mistakes, but he wouldn’t let him, he was wrong!

 Patton froze. His expression morphed into something cold, something that made him feel something new… fear.

 He was afraid as Patton gripped his arm too hard, shoved him back, somehow freezing him in place. Bright light lit the space, Janus screamed, colors flashed, his vision went dark, and everything stopped.

…

He shoots awake.

 His wings are still pinned back, but he can feel them, now, a relief, though they ache, yet.  

 He can hear speaking. He forces himself to his feet, nearly tumbling over at the dull wash of pain, at the unbalanced weight of his wings behind him, which would usually help steady him or be tucked primly back, now hindered by splints and bandages. His head swims, so full of memories and shifting images and he needs to get there, needs to reach him, so he forces himself forwards, leaning heavily against the walls, until he reaches a doorway, trips over a rug, and goes falling to the floor.

 Impact never comes, someone swears, and catches him, and he opens his eyes to those mismatched ones, so strange, but so familiar, and he doesn’t hesitate, now, to throw his arms around him, and cry.

 “I know, darling. It hurts. But it will be alright.” Janus murmurs to him, clearly mistaking his anguish as being borne of his fall, or his wounds, and he shakes as he feels him card a hand through his hair.

 “I’m sorry.” He manages, through great, gasping heaves of air.

 “shh, there’s nothing to apologize for, love.” He’s so kind, even now, he’s so kind, even when Janus thinks he doesn’t know him, doesn’t recognize him, even when Logan is simply another fallen angel, and Janus is supposed to be the tempting serpent, he’s kind, and it’s such a Janus way to spite Patton, who turned him into this, into the face of deception and trickery, accidentally giving him the keys to all the knowledge he’d ever sought.

 “my fault. You f-fell and it’s m-my fault. Patton did this to you, b-because I said he was wrong, he did this to you, and then he m-made me f-forget.” He stutters, feeling Janus freeze, his breath caught in his throat, and a hand is tilting up his chin, to meet those endless eyes.

 “what did you say? What… this is a trick. A trap. A ploy. He wouldn’t-“ He cuts off Janus, pressing their lips together, closing the space between them, and Janus is suddenly holding him close, desperate for his warmth, and he very nearly laughs at the joy surging through him as they part.

 “Janus. You are Janus. The serpent of Eden, the guardian of knowledge, everything Patton did to hurt you only made you stronger, and I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I should have fought harder, I should have remembered, I shouldn’t have let him continue to use me, I should have known-“

 “you can’t know everything, love. His power is strong, he’s ruled as a tyrant for so long, I’m… I didn’t expect you to remember, ever.” Janus murmurs, gaze roving over every inch of his face, his hands caressing his arms, as if once he stopped, Logan would vanish. “I’ve missed you.” Janus presses another kiss to Logan's lips. “I looked at the stars every night, remembering you. I’m sorry for the pain, but I’m selfishly not sorry you fell, not when it means you’re here with me.”

 “I’m not either. I’m not sorry. I’m so proud of you, Janus. I…” his voice breaks, and he buries his head against Janus's chest. “I love you.”

 “I love you, too, darling dearest.”

 “I'm sorry. He took the sky from you. I’m sorry.” He cries softly, feeling Janus rock him.

 “it doesn’t matter. You’ll still have them. And I have you. That’s what matters, Logan. You are my stars. You are my universe, and Patton failed, because we are together, and that is all I’ve ever dreamed.”

 They stay like that, holding each other, whispering memories and I love yous and kissing for a long time, drowning in each other until the sun set and the stars rose.

[cosmiciaria]

Assassin’s Creed Unity Review/honest thoughts/discussion - SPOILERS (long post)

So I decided to finally settle on a proper review – although this one is going to be more of what here in Argentina we call a "sincericidio": basically I will spit my guts out and cry in one corner, while being completely honest about my feelings. I will try to keep most spoilers at bay, like I always do, but there's just one thing I cannot not talk about which is THE spoiler so – I want you to be considered warned.

Before I start, I should state, since this is my review and reviews are quite personal actually, why this game is so important to me and why I wanted to play it so bad. There's a combination of factors, and obviously this game isn't going to strike the same chords with everyone, so bear in mind that this is strictly subjective and, right now, personal.

First factor and I think the most important one: I like writing. Wait, don't leave the review just yet. I like writing and creating characters. I have many. Lately I've been revisiting a character that had a very sad backstory and added quite long happy ending for him. I made him fall in love again. He's black haired, wears a short pony tail… his new love interest is a redhead with wavy hair… ok, you get me now, don't you? And what's worse, is that their story takes place in a fictional world that resembles quite much Europe of 1800's. So clothes and ballrooms and palaces and big, fluffy dresses are a thing in this story of mine. I think that, if you've ever created a character, to find another fictional, similar character in any medium is going to draw your attention to that product right away. It did happen to me with Cal Kestis from SW Jedi: Fallen Order, I have another redhead baby boy that needs to be protected at all costs. It's a way for us to 'see', let's say, or imagine our characters being brought to life.

Second factor: I love Paris. I visited Versailles and Paris back in late 2018, and I went there with zero expectations, only to fall in love with France. I love the Château de Versailles. I love palaces. I love the Seine. I love the Louvre. I love it. All of it. If I could, I'd live there. Sadly, I'm poor and speak little to no French at all.

Third Factor: I'm learning French! I dream with the day I can speak like five languages as well as I speak English (I studied it for ten years so… it kinda makes sense that I feel comfortable with it). I'm still struggling with French, but I will get there someday. I will. Because I love it. I love the language. Oui.

Fourth factor: I also really really, really like the French Revolution, and I've never, much to my surprise, watched or played any series, videogame, movie or anything that takes place in such a context (if you have recommendations, please drop them right away!). And I say "to my surprise" because I really like that part of History! So, to live in almost first person how the French Revolution unfolded – to hear the chansons and to see people gathered in crowds at every corner, listening to a liberty preacher wielding the French flag – that was glorious.

Fifth and yeah we're done: I love Les Misérables. I know it happens way later than the French Revolution, but since this musical (and the 2012 movie) became my 'home', I can't help but feel a stronger connection with everything I said above. I can watch that movie over and over and I will still sing Empty chairs and empty tables with tears in my eyes, despite its flaws.

I had like every reason to play this game. And it paid off.

Before plunging into it, I did read the novelization. Sadly, it was only to satisfy my soon-to-be-fulfilled obsession with the game, since I don't think the quality of the narration was, uhm, that good – it felt like you needed to have played the game before reading it. And I get it, it's a videogame adaptation, that's fine, but when you look at it as standalone book, it doesn't stand alone that good. What disappointed me, though, wasn't the narration, which was what I totally expected it to be, nor the dialogues or the ending – it was Élise. I was bit weary about this because she came across as completely different character than what I had in mind about her, and I didn't like her. At all. In the book, at least. I didn't like her because she had a few comments and took some decisions that made her look like she was stupid and/or selfish. I can understand the selfish part; I do not want to even believe that she's stupid. So that's why the book was a bit of a letdown for me. I recommend it, though, if you're a fan, because there's a book exclusive character that really gets the plot moving and he's endearing: Mr. Weatherall. Oh, what a man.

Now, regarding the game itself – it shouldn't come as a surprise that I thoroughly enjoyed it. As I've stated in another post, this game is barely an Assassin's Creed, since you delve like zero into the AC lore, and it's just an excuse for your character – Arno – to know parkour. Which in fact he knows before becoming an assassin, so it begs the question, why is this game even in this franchise? I digress. It's an AC game at the end of the day and that won't change.

But do not jump into this game expecting it be your average AC story. I firmly believe that the creators wanted to convey a different story here. For starters, Arno is no hero. Arno doesn't want to save the world. Arno doesn't care about any artifact or magic or creed. Arno only wants to discover who's the man behind De La Serre's death. That's his main driving force. And behind that, there's this undeniable and yet quite destructive feeling that pulls him forward: Élise.

Élise and Arno's relationship goes deeper into this story than it's noticeable at first glance. When you look back upon the plot, you discover that without their love 'subplot', there's no plot at all. If I may be so bold, I would even argue that Arno's story is a tragic love story. All the assassin's lore, all the betrayals, the first few assassinations, it all falls back into the background when Élise returns to the stage almost halfway through the game. And even though they only share like one kiss or two during the 40 hours of gameplay, there's still this latent, persistent motivation behind each of Arno's actions, that he wouldn't be doing what he's doing if it wasn't for Élise.

And it all comes down to that one line: What I wanted was you.

I cannot stress enough how much I loved all of the drunkard memory of Versailles. I think it embodies Arno's perfect character development. The constant rain and the bluish filter on every framerate added to the overall depressing atmosphere. I felt miserable while playing those quests, and the moment he steps out into the entrance of the Château de Versailles and reflects on his past decisions – decisions that have been stolen from him, because he could never defend himself nor change the course of actions on his own accord – that exact moment that he sits down and cries, I cried too.

Because all the game, all the memories, all the dialogues go in a crescendo only to crumble into this abyss. And this, in turn, creates a fleshed-out character, with a believable development, believable feelings, believable motivations. I can feel for Arno, I can understand him, I pity him, and I want to hug him. The whole game reaches its peak in its main character's worst moment: when he realizes that he's screwed everything up.

And not always do we get a story where the main character doesn't win. He just doesn't. Underneath its revolutionary streets, this story reeks of inexorability and fatality. You know it, you know it in the back of your head, but you push that thought apart because you want to enjoy jumping over rooftops and finding the best strategy to kill that man. There's this underlying, looming melancholy in every memory that you play in, and that's why the end doesn't surprise us.

It makes us cry, of course, but it didn't come as a surprise at all. If you're shocked about the end, then you haven't been paying enough attention to Élise's dialogues, to the tone of the story, to her letters, to where this plot was going. Because, like I said, the story is about Arno and Élise's relationship, it isn't about defeating the bad guy. And there was only one way that story could end.

*cries in French*

*Je pleure beaucoup*

I know the game has been panned by players for its performance. And being the 2020 year of our lord, I cannot say I reject those allegations, since it's been 6 years since the game was released. I hope enough patches were implemented to salvage the bugs. I only came across one bug in my entire playthrough which bothered me a little: some NPC's would sometimes pop into cutscenes and phase through the characters like nothing. At first it was funny, but then towards the end it happened two more times, in important cutscenes with our lovely couple, which kinda destroyed all immersion, if you know what I mean. The rest was fine: it never crashed on me, I didn't encounter the infamous, horrendous bug that unleashed memes in internet, never a T-pose or something that rendered the game unplayable – nothing, only that funny bug I mentioned. I did see the drop in framerates, specially in very crowded areas – but to be honest I never saw a game with so many NPC's together in the same place, like, hundreds of them, each with unique animations and varied models. I only come from playing Syndicate, and even there the number of NPC's was lower. Here is jarringly unreal, I didn't know the French Revolution was THIS jam-packed with people!

On a graphical department, this 2014 game still holds up. Very well. I think it even looks better in some scenes than some of its successors. The cutscenes were sometimes very cinematographic, with close ups, zoom outs, certain angles, with quite real lighting and shadows. I know it's not Naughty Dog and it doesn't have the whole Sony battalion behind, but damn if some of the character's expressions were really good. It didn't happen often, so when one of them had this very specific face I was like *insert surprised pikachu meme*.

I also enjoyed the music a lot. I don't know why but the one from the main menu stuck with me for a while. All of the songs have this Versailles, aristocratic tone to it which put me in the mood.

I have only one minor complaint and its entirely optional, let's say – I want to platinum this game. But I don't own PS plus, because it's, uhhh, expensive in my country (do not want to indulge in dollar exchange rates right now). And there are like two trophies only obtainable through multiplayer, which renders my trophy hunt useless. But, alas, I knew this before buying the game. I think that games shouldn't come with multiplayer trophies for the platinum. If you have to pay extra for something, it must be completely optional. And so should be the trophies related to it. It's a bit disappointing, though, because after finishing this game I want so bad to return to it, but if I can't platinum, I don't see myself coming back to it soon. Either way, I could still earn the rest of the trophies, but that would only enrage me more when the last 3% is going to be locked forever *cries again*.

All in all, my major question at the end is: why does this game receive so much hate? I guess if I came from a hardcore fan standpoint I could understand it more. If I had played all its predecessors before this one, I would also feel that the gameplay and the objectives are repetitive. That the challenges are bs. But the stealth aspect has been improved, the parkour has been redesigned and adapted, and as of now, bugs aren't a problem anymore. I want to believe that when a remaster for the PS5 comes out or, I don't know, if someone by divine grace has an epiphany in the near future regarding this game, people will change their mind on this one and will appreciate more what it wanted to be, than what they made it to be. After all, this is Arno's story. Arno's tragic love story.

Also this game is beautiful JUST LOOK AT IT LOOK AT IT!!! 

Sorry couldn’t help myself

[bobzora]

official persona 5 character review

i have only played up to the end of the third palace but i won’t be able to play for a few weeks because my sibling has ABANDONED ME (single tear) and we play together. and i’m bored. so HERES MY REVIEW of all the major characters so far. under read more because i do tend to ramble

- mc/joker (bob johnson)

why is my silent video game protagonist a catboy. it’s funny to me how much personality he manages to have despite being. yknow. a blank slate to project on. charisma! the dialogue options when you’re talking to shadows that are like “girl power!” live in my mind. joker is a girlboss to me. feminism win

- ryuji

he’s like one of those very excited big dogs where you’re like “oh good for you buddy! oh yeah buddy!” but you’re also just like man this is a bit much. on one hand he’s a very good guy but on the other hand sometimes i feel a very strong urge to insult him or just be mean to him in general, often for no particular reason. i like him i really do he just has that kind of personality. he’s a bro. his pirate thing is funny i know they’re named after like. historical figures/characters in literature(?) but captain kidd sounds so. it’s funny ok. it’s funny. he’d be a backyardagain. i like how he’s a mamas boy that’s cute. sorry about your leg buddy. he’s very. naive isn’t the right word but something like that. i still want to bully him. his grin looks dumb (endeared)

- morgana

i think it’s funny how big his head is when he’s in his metaverse mascot form he’s like a bobblehead i want him to fall over from the weight. the gags about his puppy crush on ann and his dislike of being called a cat are ANNOYING like sorry about your identity crisis but i really don’t care. he is cute sometimes though it’s not like i hate him but he’s a little annoying! you know! i’m not big on mascot characters in general haha

- ann

i adore ann she is cute and great and she deserves a lot better get this girl a better costume PLEASE. at the start of the game i was already rooting for her hardcore cause everyone was being terrible to her (very common occurrence that happens to like every character i have noticed. Society) and then she had that thing where she was like “let’s have him continue to live so he can suffer more” and i was like HELL YEAH ann is always saying the truth man. other thieves like “yah it wouldn’t be moral to kill them” (tho they’re cool with the mind control lol 🤔) but ann’s like “idc about that lol i just want him to suffer” SO TRUE. so true. i like her pigtails

- yusuke

ngl before i started playing i kind of already knew that i’d like this guy. i didn’t know much about him other than gay little artist but i knew. i was right. i am incredibly fond of this guy. partially because i too am a weirdo artist with parental issues (his persona awakening had me like *vibrates*) but mostly because he is just so funny. look at this guy! look at his stupid little tail! i lost my mind while doing his first confidant event thing he is GREAT. VERY cool. i just really like him. i could sit there and listen to his long impassioned speeches for a long time

- makoto

i was a big fairy tail fan in early middle school (unfortunate) and i play in dub so every time she opens her mouth i can only hear lucy/every other dub character her va has voiced cause there’s lots of them. ok first of all i’m not a big fan of her character archetype. yknow the straight laced student council president type. nothing personal just not my thing yknow! i do sympathize with her Issues of being useful and being used by the adults around her ofc but i’m not like INVESTED invested. tbf i haven’t known her too long. what’s his face mafia guy’s palace didn’t feel as personal as the last couple which probably contributes to that (underwhelming). on the other hand i really like that she has a motorcycle i was like ?! QUEEN and then THAT WAS HER CODENme??? very cool of her. i don’t care about her that much but i do think she is cool. if i were to encounter her irl i would be so intimidated

- akechi

he has not joined the team yet but he obviously will. i have not seen much of him yet but i do have many opinions. i did know he was this games komaeda archetype before playing because of the sheer amount of arguing i can vaguely remember scrolling past about him but even if i didn’t i would’ve instantly been able to tell. he’s fake as hell. i lose it every other sentence whenever he’s on screen WHO IS THIS GUY. “thesis antithesis *pretentious stuff*” “woowwwww you’re so interesting ^-^” “woahh look we happen to have met waiting for the train teehee” (whenever he pops up in those train scenes it feels like a jumpscare) there is a high percentage chance that i will like this guy a lot. there is a precedent for me really liking that sort of character and he is very entertaining. i hope he is just so unhinged. i mean there’s like a 99% chance he’s the ~mysterious guy causing all the accidents~ and also the “heh kid u were betrayed by one of your own” guy. so. he gives me the vibes of one of those really tiny cutesy dogs who are just incredibly aggressive. funny to me how ryuji hates him to an absurd degree like buddy chilll yeah he sucks but wowww. i LOVE that stupid doodle of him on the classroom chalkboard. the anime sparkles. his hair is ugly btw. we met on 6/9 which turns me into a 12 year old. i enjoyed our silly little tv debate

- futaba

i’m 99% sure that’s the name of the girl with the orange hair and glasses? i haven’t met her yet. she does the hackerman typing thing in the opening which is cute. i’m just mentioning her because i think she’s cute. she’s a techie with orange hair so i’ll probably like her

- fluffy brown hair girl

only character in the game art i haven’t mentioned so i kind of have to so it’s fair. she looks kind?? very fluffy. fluttershy is probably her favorite my little pony. she would eat bread

IN CONCLUSION everybody here needs therapy and also i’m mad that i got invested in a game with time / resource management / stealth mechanics :/ . the battle system is very cool. also the menus are the best character they’re SO sexy

[vindicatedvirgil]

little shadow / moxiety

So, this is inspired by a song that’s on Patton’s playlist, “Sad” by Alexander 23. The first time I listened to this playlist this song really stood out to me as representative of the relationship that Patton & Virgil have, so I wanted to write a fic representing that. The title of the fic is inspired by another song on Patton’s playlist, “Little Shadow” by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and the lyrics are at the end of the fic for reasons.

(i still can’t believe i’ve written three fics in like 24 hours, the last time i did that was years ago)

also, for timeline purposes, this is set right after “Embarrassing Phases” since that’s when I feel a lot of the moxiety angst really takes form (it makes me cry every time I watch it, help). The first few paragraphs are from the end of the episode when Patton is talking to Thomas about Virgil.

included: moxiety, angst, character!Thomas at the beginning, kitchen angst, remus popping in at literally the most inconvenient moment, moxiety ROMANCE ok i know a lot of people get uncomfy with that but there is K I S S I N G so beware, kinda fluffy too. it’s hard to do fluff like this while keeping Virge completely in character but I did my best okay

(masterlist)

“I feel kind of confused now,” Patton admitted. “I always try to show Virgil love and support, but… lately…” He sighed, “I feel like I always… inevitably… do something wrong.”

“Aww, Patton… I… I understand.” Thomas replied, “There’s a lot that Virgil could do that I don’t want him to do. He knows exactly how to push my buttons. But… He is who he is. All we can do, is… try to listen to him, as best as we can… and adapt to his needs. It’s not an easy thing to navigate, so we’re going to run into problems… but if it’s any consolation, Patton,” He continued, “I see how hard you try… and I think… you’re doing a really great job.” 

Patton smiled softly and sank down, into his corner of the mind space. He changed out of his Pawton costume, and noticed the card that Virgil had made him sitting on the table. He picked it up, opening it and sighing at the words “best friends”. Were they still best friends? Were they… ever?

All Patton wanted to do was help Virgil with the sadness that he knew was there. Sure, Patton had sadness too, but Virgil’s was… hard to look at. Patton just felt like a Band-Aid that would eventually just fall off because it wasn’t sticky enough – even though he makes Virgil “want to die of laughter”. Sometimes making someone laugh through their pain isn’t helpful.

Patton set the card down, and went out into the mindspace kitchen. Maybe he would make Virgil some of his favorite cookies. He started to pull the ingredients out of the cupboard when he heard footsteps behind him. He glanced over his shoulder and saw Virgil, leaning against the wall. He was back in his hoodie and sweats, and had a frown on his face.

“Hey, kiddo–” Patton hesitated. “I mean, Virge-Virgil. W-What’s up?” Virgil furrowed his brows, his frown deepening. “Everything alright?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Virgil hopped up to sit on one of the counters. Patton rubbed the back of his neck, looking down at his feet. “Patton, I wanted to say that I’m sorry… I appreciate what you’re doing, trying to make me feel better, but…”

“No, hey, kiddo, it’s not your fault. I shouldn’t be so pushy,” Patton admitted, looking up at the anxious side. “I just want to do what I can to make you… happy. It’s hard for me to tell if what I’m doing helps or if you’re… too good at being sad, and I’m hurting you in the process.”

“It helps, a little… but then I’m reminded of who I am, Patton. I’m not happy-go-lucky like you or Roman.” Virgil sighed, “But... you’re the best at making me laugh, the best at making me feel... happy.”

“I’m not always happy-go-lucky, Virgil. I want you to feel loved and happy, but I think I always end up… messing it all up.” Patton leaned against the counter across from Virgil. “I wish I could take all of your pain away, but I know that’s not… what you want, or even what you need.”

“I wouldn’t be… me… without all of this stuff. That’s my role.” Virgil hopped down from the counter and approached Patton. “But I also have grown so much thanks to you. Because of your acceptance, I know that I’m not just… dark and broody. I can be helpful, too.” He reached out and put a hand on Patton’s cheek, a small smile crossing his features. “I appreciate everything you’ve done and everything you’re trying to do.”

“Virgil, I…” Patton looked down, trying to avoid Virgil’s gaze. Virgil stepped closer to the moral side, their bodies pressed together. Patton’s breath hitched, his face turning bright red. “I-”

“Ooh, was someone going to make cookies~?” Remus exclaimed, dancing into the room. He stopped upon seeing the two standing so close. Virgil let go of Patton and backed up, head down. “Hmph. Well, let me know when they are ready~” And with that, he was gone.

“Patton,” Virgil started. The moral side buried his face in his hands and sunk down so he was sitting on the ground, back against the cabinets. Virgil kneeled down in front of him, trying to get him to move his hands. 

“I’m sorry, Virgil.” Patton whispered, so softly that Virgil almost didn’t hear him. The anxious side tilted his head, confused.

“Why are you apologizing, Patton? You’ve done so much for me.” Virgil said, still trying to pull Patton’s arms away from his face. “Look at me, please…” Patton finally lowered his arms, and Virgil softened at seeing the other’s face streaked with tears, the black glasses fogging up. “Oh, Pat…” He pulled on Patton’s hands so that the other fell forward into his arms. Virgil hugged Patton tightly, even though the way they were sitting on the floor wasn’t exactly comfortable.

“I’m thinking things I shouldn’t.” Patton finally admitted, his face pressed into Virgil’s chest. “I’m sorry.” He looked up at Virgil’s face, then put his hands on the anxious side’s cheeks, “Please forgive me for what I’m about to do.” Patton closed his eyes and leaned forward, making their lips meet in an awkward kiss. He expected Virgil to push him away, to scream, to run out of the room, so when the embodiment of a dark and stormy night began to kiss him back, he almost backed up in surprise.

“You’re forgiven,” Virgil breathed between kisses. 

---

It had been a few days since the encounter in the kitchen, and Patton hadn’t seen Virgil since. Thomas’ anxiety was working overboard, and almost every side was busy at work to get their job done. Logan and Roman were always at the forefront of the projects, with Remus trying to mess everything up, which only made Virgil hide in his room. Patton was trying his best to encourage everyone to keep going, even Janus, who was trying to make sure that Thomas took care of himself, too. 

Finally, though, everyone was able to take a break. Patton made them all a home-cooked meal, but Virgil didn’t show up when he called everyone to eat. He took a plate for Virgil and his own plate down to Virgil’s basement bedroom, not bothering to knock. 

“Virgil…?” Patton called softly. He set the two plates down when he noticed Virgil curled up in a ball in the corner, soft snores escaping his slightly open mouth. “Aw, poor baby.” He very gently picked up Virgil and laid him on the bed, taking off his shoes and pulling the blankets over him. Patton kissed Virgil’s forehead and smiled, then turned back to the plates of food. He left one for Virgil, along with a note that said Please eat this when you wake up. Let me know if you need anything. ~Patton. Then he took his plate and left Virgil to get some rest.

---

A few hours later, Patton was getting ready to go to sleep when there was a knock at his bedroom door. He opened the door to see Virgil standing there, a pillow in his hand and pajamas on. 

“Hey, Virgil. You okay?” Patton asked, moving aside so Virgil could enter the room. 

“Can I sleep in here with you tonight?” Virgil asked hesitantly. “I uh… tried going back to sleep after I ate the food you left me, but… I missed you.” Patton smiled softly and closed the door. 

“You didn’t miss me, I’m right here, you silly~” He giggled. But then he smiled and got into bed on one side, while Virgil got in on the other. The moral side propped himself up on his pillows, allowing Virgil to curl into him, head on his chest. Patton’s fingers laced into the anxious side’s hair. “I missed you, too, Virgil.”

“You’re so warm,” Virgil murmured, snuggling closer to Patton. “If I had known how cozy you were, I would’ve slept on you a long time ago.” Patton smiled, letting out a content sigh before he began singing softly to Virgil as the anxious side dozed off.

Patience, shadow

For all your sight, there's no sight to see

Little shadow, little shadow

To the night, will you follow me?

Pardon, shadow

Hold on tight to your darkened key

Little shadow, little shadow

To the night, will you follow me?

Closer, shadow

For all your strikes, still, we're caught between

All this sorrow, little shadow

To the night, will you follow me?

Every shape and size

Deep and deep, we dive

Turn and turn aside

To a fantasy

Little shadow

Into the night, will you follow me?

Little shadow

To the night, will you follow me?

[whitewolfandthefox]

A Silent Love

Summary: Geraskier fic; Jaskier has been cursed to fade unless he speaks his most precious secret. That’s an easy fix, except for the fact that he’s sworn not to come in between Geralt and Yennefer.

A/N. This is for the darling @riviawitch3r. Happy Birthday Lu!! Hope you have an amazing day, love! You sent me your lil prompt thing and I sat down and wrote the story in like 3 hours cause I loved it so much, hope you enjoy it! I hope I’ve done it justice. Also a huge thanks to @hina-chans-stuff for being my amazing beta for this!

Warnings: angst, so much angst, we’ve got some pining here. Fluffy at the end. Some soft found family

Words: 3.9k

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A Silent Love

It had been so easy at first, to ignore his feelings. When they were on the road and it was just the two of them, Jaskier could pretend that Geralt’s gruff manner towards him was the way he treated everyone. That changed when Ciri joined them. The Witcher’s manner softened whenever he was around his Child Surprise, Jaskier could see it in his eyes. His face would go gentle and his shoulders drop, Geralt didn’t hold himself as rigid around the child.

It got worse when Yennefer started travelling with them as well. Geralt seemed so happy. Jaskier didn’t think he’d ever seen the man laugh. Chuckle sure, but an outright belly laugh? He had been shocked the first time Yennefer had caught him off guard. His face had split into a wide grin, eyes crinkling as he clutched at his chest, other arm pulling Ciri in closer, throwing his head back as a loud laugh burst from his lips. Yennefer had looked delighted, eyes lighting up as she grinned at the two other members of her family, Ciri giggling as she nuzzled into her papa.

Jaskier felt his heart sink as he watched the small family of three interact, never having felt so much like an outsider as he did now. He managed a small smile as Geralt glanced his way, trying not to show how much he was hurting as his heart split in two. He would never say anything, no, Geralt was happy and that was enough for Jaskier. He would continue travelling with them, telling Geralt’s stories, but he would stay in the shadows of the family. He would never dare to impose on them, to force his way into somewhere he obviously wasn’t wanted.

It had been months since Yennefer and Ciri had joined the pair, and every day it got a little bit harder to get up. He thought Yennefer had noticed, he had spotted the sad looks she sent his way, but she never said anything. She wasn’t unkind to him, no, he never felt unwelcome but he still felt like he was imposing on the group. Ciri seemed to like him well enough, always asking him questions and requesting songs, but at night it was Yenenfer she curled up with, if Geralt wasn’t there, it was Yennefer who she went to for comfort.

Some days he thought about leaving. He was well enough known that he could make an easy living for himself amongst the courts, playing for royalty. He had been asked to be a court bard enough times, the gods knew he would have been fine. But he didn’t want to leave Geralt. Every time he thought about not seeing the man’s face when he awoke, his heart would clench and he would immediately reject the idea.

For the most part, Jaskier was happy. He had accepted he would never have his love returned, he was happy to travel with the family and to be able to see the world. He would never have been able to see the things he had, had he stayed as a viscount or as a professor at Oxenfurt. And he would never have met the people he did. Ciri was a wonderful child, an absolute delight to be around. He was slowly getting under Yennefer’s skin, she had started joining him for his cup of tea in the mornings. And Geralt. He loved that man with every fiber of his being and wouldn’t change a thing about their relationship. He was able to spend his days romping through the wilderness with the big gruff Witcher in tow. He knew Geralt cared, just not in the way that Jaskier wanted him to. 

But he was content with that.

The days passed, Jaskier spending his time composing as Geralt taught Ciri swordplay and Yennefer wandered in and out. The days were peaceful. Their little group was happy.

Until he gets cursed, and starts fading.

They laugh it off at first, thinking the old woman was mad, just chanting off little rhymes.

Forgotten you will be

Doomed to fade

Should you not confess

That which you hold dear

Jaskier doesn’t feel any different and they promptly forget about it. One day, Ciri comes racing for him and he opens his arms to catch her. As she rams into him, he loses his balance, going straight over backwards as her weight takes them both to the ground. He lays there stunned, Ciri has never been able to knock him over before. As he regains his feet and slings his arm over her shoulders, he chalks it up to the fact that she’s been growing. 

He starts to get suspicious when Geralt hauls him to his feet and he is launched past the man. Geralt stares at him in surprise, Jaskier laughing nervously. Geralt frowned at him, muttering “You’re lighter,” before moving past him.

They stop at an inn one night, Jaskier and Ciri sharing a room while Yennefer and Geralt share another. While washing his face, the bard catches sight of himself in the mirror. He pauses, as he stares at his face. He looks paler. Raising a hand, he freezes in horror as he realizes he can see through his fingertips. He stays in front of the mirror, staring at his hands as he thinks about the times that he was knocked over or when someone pulled too hard. He thinks back to the rhyme curse, You are doomed to fade. Was this happening?

Someone knocks on the door. “Jaskier?” Geralt’s voice calls. “Are you coming down for dinner?”

When he doesn’t respond, Geralt knocks again before the door opens. “Jaskier?”

He sees the bard staring at his hands, immediately striding over to grip his smaller hands between his own. He stares at them, running his fingertips over the pale skin before looking up at Jaskier, face expressionless. But Jaskier knew, he could see the worry in Geralt’s eyes. He gently pulled his hands out the man’s grip. “It’s okay, Geralt. It’ll be ok,” he whispered.

“The curse,” Geralt manages to get out, frozen in place. Suddenly he turns and leaves the room, leaving Jaskier to sag against the wall behind him. The bard drew a hand over his face, sighing as he looked back down to his fingers. He knew what he had to do to break the curse, but he can’t, he won’t. He won’t do that to Geralt.

As he moves to the bedroom, he grabs his notebook before sitting on the bed, opening it to scribble down notes.

That which you love / forever hold dear / keep it a secret / so no one can hear

He looks up again as Geralt comes back into the room, Yennefer in tow. He nudges her towards Jaskier, gesturing at his hands. Jaskier gently closes his book and puts it to the side, placing his hands in his lap as Yennefer rolls her eyes at the Witcher before coming to sit next to the bard. She sounds annoyed when she speaks. “Geralt says you’re turning invisible, what happened? Did you spill something on yourself?”

He wordlessly offers her his hands, ignoring the sharp look that she sends him. “No words? It's not often I find you speechless, bard.”

She goes to take his hands, recoiling when she touches his skin. “What the fuck?”

Gingerly, she reaches out again, flinching slightly when she comes into contact with his fingers. She closes her eyes as she bends her head over him, mouthing silent incantations. Lifting her head, Jaskier sees the guilt in her eyes and knows that what he thought was true. Her mouth twists as if she bit into something sour as she whispers, “I’m sorry.”

Jaskier looks at her, a gentle smile on his face. “It’s okay, Yen. That’s what I thought.”

She refuses to look him in the eye as she recites the words spoken against him. “Forgotten you will be, doomed to fade, should you not confess, that which you hold dear. Your most precious secret, Jaskier. You must speak it aloud to reverse the spell.”

Jaskier merely nods but says nothing. Yennefer glances up at him and sees the resolve in his eyes. Surprising both of them, she pulls him in for a fierce hug, Jaskier pausing for a long moment before he wraps his arms around her sides, returning the embrace. She pulls back and searches his face, looking for something. Seeming to find it, she offers him a wan smile before standing, pausing to murmur something to Geralt as she passes him, closing the door behind her as she leaves the room.

Geralt stands in silence, staring at Jaskier as he refuses to look up at the Witcher. The larger man slowly moves toward the bed, sitting next to the bard. The silence stretches between them, seemingly endless before Geralt finally speaks. “Do you… know what it is?”

Jaskier barks out a humourless laugh. “Of course I do, dear Witcher. I have been carrying it with me for years.”

“So then just say it.”

“What?”

“Just say it. Get it over with, and break the curse.”

Jaskier shakes his head, playing with his fingers. Have they gotten more see through as we’ve been sitting here? How fast is this going to go? “It’s not something I care to share with you, Geralt.”

“Then Yen or Ciri. Someone will listen to you.” Geralt is insistent, Jaskier can tell he won’t drop it. He can’t tell him though, he won’t ruin the family that Geralt has found for himself. And he won’t ruin their friendship. Better to fade with dignity than to be turned out in shame. 

“I won’t speak it, Geralt, not to anyone.” At his words, Geralt bursts from the bed, pacing in front of Jaskier as the bard continues staring at the floor. And what a nice floor it is, such a nice whorl pattern in the wood. He glances up as Geralt stills to see the man staring at him with those golden eyes he has come to love, defiance and worry mixed in them. The years travelling with the man has taught Jaskier how to read his emotions, as hidden as he thinks he keeps them.

“I won’t think any less of you, whatever it is.” Geralt is staring at him with the intensity of the sun, Jaskier fears he will burn away under it, like the fog chased away at sunrise.

“I can’t… I can’t be so selfish and take away what happiness you’ve found for yourself.” Jaskier says this with a bitterness, hoping Geralt won’t hear it. He does though, a wounded look appearing on his face.

“Damn it, Jaskier, is this secret so damning that you’d give your life for it?” Geralt’s voice breaks at the end, and by the gods Jaskier wishes this wasn’t happening. Would he give his life if it meant Geralt could have his happiness in peace? He’s pretty sure he would, he’d like to think that he’s built a relationship with the man that would let him be happy with that outcome. As the thoughts come into his head, he realizes that yes, he would die for Geralt’s happiness. He offers the man a sad smile as one of his shoulders lifts in a shrug before dropping, demonstrating his answer to Geralt’s question. The Witcher growls low in his throat before spinning on his heel and stalking out of the room. 

Jaskier’s face drops as Geralt leaves, flinching when the door slams behind him. The sorrow that he’s kept at bay overwhelms him, tears running down his cheeks as he turns his face into the pillow and breaks down into sobs.

**~*~*~*~**

Time passes, and as each day goes by, Jaskier fades a little bit. At first Ciri doesn’t notice, but when she realizes she can see through Jaskier’s hands as he plays his lute for her, she starts demanding answers. Yennefer just offers him a sad smile as the young girl breaks down in tears as Jaskier tries to explain what’s happening. The next few days are spent with her pestering Jaskier to tell her his secret, trying to guess what it was so he didn’t have to say it. She finally gives up after Geralt takes her to the side for a while, coming back with red, puffy eyes. She latches onto Jaskier and buries her face into his chest, sobbing into his clothes as he rocks her in his arms. He almost breaks that day, wanting to stay with the young girl, but then thinks of how he might rip this family apart, and it stays in his heart.

The curse is really driven home when Jaskier goes to pick up a pot and it slips out of his fingers. He frowns down at the metal before leaning forwards to pick it up, hand passing through it as he goes to grab it. He freezes at this, voice catching in his throat at the motion. Slowly, he raises his head to see Geralt staring at him, fear evident on his face. The Witcher looks at him a moment longer, Jaskier pinned beneath his golden gaze until Geralt looks away as he strides over, picking up the pot himself before depositing it on the fire. The bard can feel the man’s gaze on him for the rest of the night, having retreated to the edge of the camp so he wouldn’t be in the way and wouldn’t be asked to help. Geralt stops giving Jaskier tasks to do after that. 

Ciri breaks down the day she can no longer hug Jaskier, arms passing through him as she goes to lean into his side. Yennefer takes her to the side to comfort her as Geralt argues with Jaskier again, not quite begging for him to voice his secret, storming off when the bard refuses to, yet again. The argument lingers in the air, but Jaskier can’t do that to the man he loves. He won’t get in the way of his happiness. 

As he fades, so does his voice. Close to the end, Jaskier is so faded you can barely see his outline and he’s barely louder than the wind whistling through blades of grass. He still trails after them, but doesn’t often interact with the trio. He’s more like a guardian angel at this point, or maybe a wandering spirit. Geralt still knows where he is though, his eyes often lingering on the spot where Jaskier has settled once they are done travelling for the day. He’s stopped asking Jaskier for his secret, seeming to have resigned himself to the fact that he will lose his friend. 

Ciri is sad, she spends her nights playing the simple tunes Jaskier taught her while he still could. He wanted Ciri to keep it, to have something to remember him by. He had given Yennefer his book of completed songs, she pretended not to care but he had found her looking through it one evening when she thought he was on the other side of camp. He gave nothing to Geralt, only because he had nothing significant to give.

One day Jaskier wakes up and feels like he could float into the sky. This is the day, he thinks, this is the day I die. He’s sad, but that’s okay. Ciri and Yennefer haven’t been able to see him the last few days, relying on Geralt to translate the few snippets that he’s been able to catch. He lays in the grass for a while, hearing the sounds of camp being packed up around them. That was the nice thing about fading, he no longer got hungry or dirty, there wasn’t much left of him to be able to. As the group gets ready to leave, Geralt pauses and looks around for him. Jaskier can tell he can’t see him when his eyes sweep over the small hill he is sitting on. 

“Jaskier?” Geralt’s voice is tentative, almost as if he was asking the bard if he was playing a joke on him. When he sees no movement, his shoulders droop. Yennefer passes him, laying a hand on his shoulder before she directs Ciri to help saddle Roach. The two of them pause to look at him once they are ready, Geralt glancing up at the silence that has fallen over the small clearing. He manages a tight smile.

“Go on ahead, I’ll catch up.” Yennefer gives him a small nod as Ciri’s face falls, the older woman ushering her out ahead of him. Jaskier slowly stands, trailing down the hill as he follows Geralt to the logs they had used as seats the night before. 

I’m sorry, Jaskier tries to say, though no sound comes out. He wants to say goodbye, to say that he doesn’t regret doing this, all he ever wanted was for Geralt to be happy. He pretends not to see the defeated look on the Witcher’s face, choosing to press a soft kiss against the man’s lips, allowing himself that one guilty pleasure before he goes. Geralt’s hand comes up to touch his lips, feeling as though a cold breeze had swept across his face. 

He sits up straighter, a question coming into his voice. “Jaskier? I think you’re here, I can sense… something. Please… don’t go. I can’t,” his voice breaks, “I can’t lose another friend.”

Jaskier’s heart breaks at this, hearing the misery in his voice. He slides to his knees in front of Geralt, wrapping his arms around the bigger man’s middle. 

I don’t want to go, but it’s for the best, Geralt. I can’t come between you and Yennefer, you love each other and I can’t wreck that. Ciri is happy as well, she doesn’t need me. I’m so glad to have been able to call you my friend, even if I wanted more. You will be okay without me. I just want you to know that I love you. I always have and I always will, but I won’t regret doing this for you. You deserve all the happiness in the world, even if you think you don’t. I fought to my last breath to give you that, and I’m proud to know that’s what my last action will be. 

He closed his eyes, leaning his forehead against Geralt’s chest. He could almost imagine the man returning the embrace, his strong arms wrapping around him as he pressed the smaller man against his chest. He felt a nose brush through his hair, a breath against his ear as a soft voice murmured, “Jaskier.”

With a start, he realized that he wasn’t imagining the embrace, he could actually feel Geralt’s arms pulling him against his chest, pressing him into his body. A kiss was dropped against his forehead before Geralt buried his face into Jaskier’s hair, murmuring his name all the while. The bard clung desperately to the man, elated that he was whole again but terrified now that he had revealed his secret. He refused to look up, not wanting to see the rejection that is surely on the Witcher’s face. He feels Geralt pull back, feels the gentle hand under his chin lifting his face to see the man’s gentle, golden eyes. 

“Why didn’t you tell me, Jask?” The man’s voice was soft, insistent on pulling answers from the bard in his arms.

“I didn’t think- you wouldn’t- you had Ciri and, and Yen, I didn’t want to-” Geralt shushed him with a gentle finger against his lips. Jaskier couldn’t tear his gaze away from him, seeing the mirth in his eyes. Geralt hadn’t run yet, he didn’t understand. There was no revulsion in his gaze, Jaskier didn’t understand what was happening. He took a deep breath.

“I thought I would just be tearing you and Yen apart, getting in the way of your relationship with Ciri. I didn’t think you would even want me-”

Jaskier was silenced as Geralt leaned down, pressing his lips gently against Jaskier’s, effectively silencing the babbling that was streaming out of the bard’s mouth. He drew back to find Jaskier utterly speechless, mouth open as he stared at the man in front of him. 

“I didn’t think you had returned my feelings, little one, otherwise I would have said something.”

Jaskier was flabbergasted. “But… Yennefer…?”

“Has a part of me, but not all of me, just the same as you. She and I spoke, she suspected something but we were both too stubborn to see it.” Geralt’s eyes were wary but hopeful as he watched Jaskier’s face. “Think you can learn to share?

The bard’s face split into a smile as he realized what Geralt was asking. “If it means I get to have you? Absolutely.”

Geralt answered with a hesitant smile, pulling Jaskier into his lap as he leaned down, again capturing the smaller man’s lips in a kiss as he wound his arms around the Witcher’s neck. The bard tried to put everything he was feeling into the kiss, the relief at being alive, the delight at the new development in their relationship. He drew back as he gasped for breath, leaning their foreheads together as Geralt pulled him against his chest, the two basking in their love for each other. 

“We should go tell the others what has happened,” Jaskier murmured even as his hands tightened around Geralt’s neck.

“In a moment,” Geralt offered the bard a sheepish smile. “I want just a little longer alone with you. Once Ciri sees you, she’ll be stuck to your side for days.”

“So long as I have you on my other one, I think I can manage.” Jaskier grinned up at his lover, content with his lot in life. “I think I can even manage to get along with Yen now, she’s not so bad.”

Geralt barked out a laugh, before a look of horror crossed his face. “Now there’s two- oh man, and I thought just Yen was bad. The two of you will be the death of me.”

“Don’t worry, dear heart. I’ll protect you from the big bad sorceress when she comes after you.” Jaskier squeaked as Geralt pulled him closer, forcing his breath out as he was squished against his chest. 

The man buried his nose in the bard’s hair again, his body shaking as he chuckled, “It’s not that I’m worried about, I’m thinking of all the trouble the two, no three, of you will get in once you have a plan in mind.”

Jaskier laughed with him, before standing and offering his hand. “We really should go tell the others, I want to see Yen’s face when she realizes what’s happened.”

“It will be gloating for sure, little bard, she told me there was something there.” Jaskier pouted at this, before grinning as Geralt took his hand.

“Well, let’s go- oomphf,” his sentence was cut off as the Witcher again pulled him into an embrace, pressing the bard tight against his chest. Jaskier reached up, entwining his hands in his hair to pull Geralt down for a kiss. He pulled back, grinning up at his love with a gentle look in his eyes. Geralt smiled gently back at him, brushing a hand against his cheek before releasing him as he reached down to grasp his hand. He hummed low in his throat as Jaskier squeezed his fingers, the Witcher tugging him along behind as the two of them went to rejoin their small party, happiness lifting their hearts.

**~*~*~*~**

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[iicytodoroki]

𝐴𝑘𝑎𝑖 𝑇𝑎𝑖𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑎𝑜𝑖 - 𝑊𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐴𝑈! 𝐾𝑎𝑔𝑒𝑦𝑎𝑚𝑎 𝑇𝑜𝑏𝑖𝑜

𝘼𝙠𝙖𝙞 𝙏𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙖𝙤𝙞 𝙈𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩

𝐀𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐖𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐱 𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐑𝐞𝐝 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬! 𝐊𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐲𝐚𝐦𝐚 𝐓𝐨𝐛𝐢𝐨

Prologue > Chapter One - Who are you?  > Chapter Two

 A/N: asdfghk i totally forgot the title is what the caterpillar says over and over, but tbh i never liked that character so we ain’t having that lol also sorry its been awhile but i made it longer! (also if you are the few and want a taglist just msg me!) hope you enjoy~

Heavy breaths and branches hitting yn’s cheeks. The white-haired man just seems to be running even faster. When yn tried to follow him through a dense set of trees, she lost sight of him. 

“How...is he,” yn huffed, “so fast?”

As yn was trying to catch her breathe while having her hands on her knees in the now darker forest, another wondrous creature seemed to have caught her in their vision. 

“Well hello there, what’s a cutie doing out here in these parts all alone,” the man asked with a mischievous grin. 

Startled, yn shot her head up and looked around her. Swiveling her head left and right, yn feels a soft, fluffy appendage hold her chin, putting a stop to her head.

“Up here~,” the man cooed as he gestured to yn’s face to look up on the tree branch above her. 

Sitting there was a tall man with black shorts and a long-sleeved shirt with thin red stripes going horizontally. Behind him was his peculiar black tail, and sitting atop his bed-head were cat-like ears. His eyes peered into yn as she continued to stay silent and his grin just grew wider. 

Jumping down from his branch, the man approached yn who was still in shock and fear.

“I know I must be breath-taking,” he spited, “but I need to know...who are you?”

Stopping right in front of yn and bending down towards her face, she finally snapped out of her dazed and attempted to take several steps back. Before she could get any farther, the man’s tail went behind her at the small of her back and stopped her movements. Now a little irritated, he repeated his question, “Who are you?” with the raise of his brow.  

Red in the face with the inappropriate proximity of the man, yn stuttered out, “My n-name is yn.” 

Satisfied with her answer, the man grinned to himself. But unfortunately for yn, he still didn’t move away nor introduced himself. Yn was able to muster enough courage after what seems to be several minutes of staring at one another to ask him , “And you are…?”

Proud of being asked who he is, he removed his tail from behind her and gave a flashy grin with, “Ah my name’s Testuro Kuroo, but you can call me Testuro.”

“Um no it’s fine, Kuroo is fine for me,” replied yn. Yn was still used to her customs back home, so she still preferred calling strangers by their last name. Finally having her emotions calmed down, yn took in her surroundings. 

It looked like she was deeper into the forest and no silver-haired man in sight. Flashing, neon signs point all over the place. Confusing arrows saying the “land of the skulks” pointing upwards while the “parliament” is pointing to its left. 

More confused than ever, Yn asked Kuroo, “Um, have you by chance seen a man with silver-hair running through here?”

Kuroo looked to the side in thought for a few moments before a cheshire grin appeared on his face.

“Mmm, who knows,” he amusingly questioned. “But I know a few mad people who might,” he suggested. 

Mad…? Yn thought and did not like the sound of that. 

“Uh, I think that will be unnecessary,” yn timidly said. 

“Suit yourself, but just be aware there’s many,” Kuroo paused creepily “things out here waiting to see a newcomer in these woods.”

Kuroo turned around and shrugged nonchalantly, “But you seem like you can follow the signs…”

Yn looked at all the confusing directions around her and began to worry even more. 

As Kuroo was taking his first few steps, yn called out, “Wait! If you could please take me to those people who could know where the man is--”

Before she could finish her plea, Kuroo was next to her and his softail curling around her sides.

“Sure thing kitten,” he said slyly.

Although yn was unsure of Kuroo’s character, he was actually a person who was pretty comforting. During their walk through the woods, they heard many odd coos and rustling which shook yn. If there's all these beautiful creatures, then there’s also an equal amount of unimaginable scary one as well, she thought. However, each time, Kuroo tried to ask her questions of where she came from and how she got into his world. His soothing and calm tone was able to distract yn from the lurkers in the darkest parts of the woods.

Eventually, there was a clearing up ahead. An old mill and colorful homes could be seen across the plain. Kuroo walked a few steps ahead with an excited air around him. 

As the two got closer to the run-down structures, they see a long pastel-cloth table swarmed in old tea cups and pots. At the head of the table directly across from them was a man with wavy orange hair, on top was a cute top hat for his size. The tangerine man was jumping around while speaking to a blonde, beanpole of a guy in glasses who seems to be worn out from the suspected tea consumption or the energy of the shorter guy or both…

When yn looked closer, she saw flattened bunny ears as he tried to hide further into his folded arms on the table. 

“Wow would you look at this,” said Kuroo as he walked closer to the duo. Yn stood at the end of the table, unsure of presenting herself to the strange group. 

At the sound of Kuroo’s voice, the orange-hair man quickly turned his head to look at Kuroo.

“Ah! Welcome back Kuroo! Come, come, come join us for some freshly brewed tea,” he tried to usher the taller man but Kuroo declined.

“No thank you, you put too much sugar in your batches anyways,” he replied, “but I’m here to ask help for a new friend,” gesturing to yn’s direction. Yn tensed up when she heard this. 

The orange-haired guy immediately perked up at the sight of a new friend and dragged her to sit at the head of the table. He introduced himself as Shouyo Hinata and the sleeping bunny as Kei Tsukkishima. Tsukkishima peaked through his arms to catch a glimpse of yn and sat up, begrudgingly so. 

“And last but not least is Tadashi Yamaguchi!” Hinata exclaimed as he pulled up one side of the tablecloth to present a sleeping Yamaguchi, who was presumably knocked out from the tea and Hinata himself. Hinata was able to get the fellow up sitting on the chair, which awakened him. Now yn was able to see the cute mouse ears atop his dark green hair.

Yamaguchi provided a sleepily “Hello,” as he proceeded to make himself a cup of tea. 

Kuroo sat at the other end of the table in front of yn with his feet up the table and Hinata took the corner seat beside yn. With everyone now settled, Kuroo proceeded to say, “As I said before, Yn is looking for a white-haired pocket watch guy and I think we all know who he is…”

“OH! I think I know!” Hinata said with a teacup raised in the air. “Is it….Koushi Sugawara?”

“I’m pretty sure it is,” Tsukkishima said and Yamaguchi nodded with him.

“Who is Koushi Sugawara?” Yn questioned.

Yn brought her cup of tea but before her lips touched it, she noticed there was a chipped edge and had to turn her cup to the other side. Tsukkishima spoke up and yn made eye contact with him peering over her cup. 

“He’s the assistant for the King of the Court,” he said in distaste. 

“King of the Court?” she questioned.

“King Tobio Kageyama of the Red Hearts in Karasuno,” piped Yamaguchi, “He’s known to be cold and temperamental.”

I do not like the sound of that, yn thought to herself. 

Kuroo who was silently listening with his eyes closed finally spoke up, “Sweet yn here needs to return a belonging of that white rabbit.” 

Hinata, hearing this, immediately stood up in excitement, “A lost item? How humble of you!” Hinata approached yn radiating in excitement, “And we can take you too! We have been meaning to visit our friends in Karasuno!”

Overwhelmed a bit, yn just stared at the sunshine boy with widened eyes. 

“Unless the King finds you and throws you in jail,” interrupted Tsukkishima.

“It won't be too much of a problem if we’re careful Tsukki,” Yamaguchi pleaded, “We know the place enough and Yn will surely get captured if she goes by herself.”

“Wait a minute,” Yn cut it, “won’t you be joining us Kuroo?”

“Hmm? No, I got places to,” he peered at yn with a smirk, “lurk in.”

Yn knew she was not going with Kuroo and he knew the same. Yn also knew she had no other way to find Sugawara without getting into trouble and these guys seem to be pretty nice enough to guide her. Also, she was starting to warm up to the ball of sunshine and the other two who seemed reliable enough. 

“Ok, I will be very grateful if you guys can guide me to Karasuno,” yn asked. 

“Great! Well then off we go!” Hinata shouted as he looped his arm with yn and dragged her forward. 

Yamaguchi waited for Tsukkishima to get up from his seat. He seemingly got up not wanting to go, but he had a small smile when looking at yn and Hinata chattering off. 

“Take care, yn,” Kuroo saluted before he disappeared into the shadows of the forest.

Well this is an odd adventure but these guys seem to be friendly enough, thought yn as she smiled with her three new friends by her side.

taglist: @melanieacademy 

[therainroguefanfiction]

⁂ Lazy in Love (Shikamaru Nara)

Genre: Angst, Romance, Fluff ☁

Word Count: 2,198 ☁

Pairing: Reader x Shikamaru ☁

World: Naruto ☁

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Soft, fluffy white clouds drifted peacefully through the clear blue sky, hiding the sun from view. The breeze was gentle and calm, sending a nice chill through the air. Only a few, low ranking missions had been given out by Tsunade-sama.

You walked through the forest, looking for your lazy friend. You found him laying on his back, arms folded behind his head and eyes closed. You stood over him, a smile coming to your lips as you stared at his content face.

“Did you need something?” he mumbled, tiredly, not opening his eyes.

“Nope. Just bored.” you shrugged, looking around at the rustling leaves on the lush trees. “You’re the first one I thought to bother.”

“I’m flattered,” he mumbled again, sarcasm dripping from his every word.

“You should be.” you smirked, kneeling down next to him. “Is this how you’re planning to spend your whole day off?”

He lazily opened his eyes and looked up at you, a look of boredom playing on his features. “That was my plan until you showed up.”

“Oh come now, Shika. Am I really that bad?” you asked, cocking your head to the side, a grin on your lips.

“You’re a troublesome person.” He murmured, closing his eyes again. “It’s not enough that you bother me when I’m working but you have to bother me on my day off, too.”

“What can I say? I just love ya too much.” you smiled softly, looking away into the trees.

He had no idea just how much you meant those words. Shikamaru Nara is not only your best friend, but he’s also the love of your life. It started out as a simple crush a little while after you met. Then it turned into a full-blown love. Though, you’d never tell him that.

To him, you were just another troublesome person for him to deal with. That’s all you’d ever be and, even though you wish you could be more, you were happy to have him as just a friend rather than not have him at all.

“What’s on your mind?” His words snapped you back to reality. Shika was sitting up, looking at you dully.

“Nothing, nothing.” you smiled, standing up. “Are you hungry?”

He looked at you suspiciously before standing and sticking his hands in his pockets, “Let’s go.”

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

Upon arriving at the ramen bar, you saw Naruto and Hinata sitting there. Hinata was red as a tomato and Naruto had pieces of ramen stuck around his mouth. You chuckled, catching the attention of the shy girl as she turned around to look at you.

“H-Hello, Y/N, Shikamaru.”

“‘Sup, Hinata?” you asked kindly, sitting next to her. Shikamaru sat on your left.

“Hiya, Y/N!” Naruto said loudly, smiling that fox-like grin of his.

“Hey, Naruto. Where’s Kakashi and Sakura?”

“Dunno.” He shrugged before going back to stuffing his face.

You shook your head at his bad habits and ordered some miso ramen.

“W-Where have you been, Y/N?” Hinata asked, quietly, not meeting your gaze.

“Eh. I was just hanging out with Shika in the forest.”

“Oh yeah! You haven’t told ’em you lov-!”

You quickly slapped your hand over Naruto’s mouth before he could finish his sentence, nearly knocking Hinata off her chair. Was he really that stupid? Could he not see Shikamaru sitting there? You could only hope he hadn’t been listening.

“Shouldn’t you be training with the perv, Naruto.” you hissed through gritted teeth.

He gulped and backed away slowly before disappearing from the shop.

You sighed deeply, running a hand through your hair. “I’m not hungry anymore. I’ll uh, see you guys later,” you muttered, quickly leaving the shop. You could feel both Hinata and Shikamaru staring after you, but you ignored it and continued on. How were you supposed to act? Naruto almost gave away the biggest secret you had.

You groaned, holding your head in your hands as you walked down the street. Big mistake. You ran straight into a brick wall, bouncing off of it and hitting the ground. “Ouch!” you exclaimed, rubbing your behind. Upon closer inspection you realized it was Kakashi. “Why are you so brick wall-ish?”

He raised his eyebrow and held out his hand. “You really shouldn’t zone out like that. It’s bad for you.”

“Sorry, sensei.” You bowed and started to walk again, Kakashi at your side. “Telling me zoning out is bad for me is about the same as telling you those books are bad for you.”

He smiled, resting his hand on my head. “True. Now, what was on your mind to cause you to zone out like that?”

“Your damn student almost gave away my biggest secret,” you admitted, scowling at the ground.

“Oh? I’m guessing you mean Naruto and your love for Shikamaru.”

“Sometimes I think you’re too smart for your own good, sensei.”

“You should tell him how you feel,”

“Not gonna happen.”

“It’s your choice, but you’ll regret it if you don’t.” He smiled before disappearing.

You stared at the spot he had just been standing moments before. Would it really be best to tell him? Would you really regret not telling him and finding out what could have happened? Are you really that afraid of the truth?

You set off for the forest, plopping down under a cherry blossom tree and closing your eyes. Your heart was telling you that you should tell Shikamaru the truth while your heart told you it was a bad idea. People always say logic is better than following your heart. Then again, there are those who feel the opposite.

“What should I do?” you whispered, staring up at the sky, hoping it would give you an answer. You got one, but it wasn’t from the sky.

“Depends on the problem.”

Your eyes shot over to meet with Shikamaru’s. He was standing beside you, brow raised.

“What is the problem? You’ve been acting weird, lately. And what was up with you and Naruto back at the ramen shop?”

“It was nothing,” you responded, switching your gaze to the grass beneath you.

“Don’t give me that. You always say it’s nothing,” he said, bending down and grabbing your chin to make you look into his eyes. “I’ve been your best friend since we were little. You should be able to trust me by now.”

“It has nothing to do with trust, Shika.”

“Then what does it have to do with, Y/N? Why can’t you just tell me?” He had confusion, worry, and frustration swirling within the depths of his eyes.

You pulled your face from his grip, turning your attention back to the grass.

His fists clenched at his sides. “Fine, don’t tell me. I don’t care anyway.”

You listened to his footsteps fading away, feeling a knife pierce your heart. You hated making him mad or hurting him but you had no other choice.

You just couldn’t tell him the truth.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

“Y/N!”

You turned around to see Ino running towards you. “‘Sup, Ino?” you waited until she caught up with you before taking off walking again. She followed in step.

“Is it true?!” She squealed, excitedly.

“Is what true?” your eyebrow raised in both confusion and question.

“That you’re crushing on Shikamaru!”

You froze, rooted to the spot. “W-Where did you hear something like that?”

“I heard it from Asuma who heard from Kurenai who overheard Jiraiya telling Tsunade! Is it true?”

‘What the hell is with this weird-ass rumor chain?!’ your fists clenched as you took off running towards the training ground. You didn’t stop when Ino called out to you. You didn’t stop when Kakashi greeted you. You went straight for Naruto and held him to a tree by his neck, his feet dangling above the ground. “Naruto, you little rat!”

“W-what did I do!?” He struggled to break free from your grasp, which you tightened, eyes shimmering with pain.

Within a matter of seconds, Kakashi had ripped you off of his student, holding your arms behind your back. You struggled in his grip, but he was much stronger than you.

“What did you do to her, idiot!?” Sakura demanded, hitting Naruto in the head.

“He told Jiraiya that I… he told him my secret…!” your breathing was heavy, head bowed so a shadow covered your face. “Jiraiya opened his fat mouth and now everyone knows!”

“I-I didn’t know he’d tell!” Naruto squeaked, bowing repeatedly. “I’m sorry, Y/N!”

You were fighting back tears, struggling in Kakashi’s grip. You just wanted to run away and never be seen again.

“Everything ok, Kakashi?”

You stopped struggling, swallowing hard. If that was who you thought it was, then that meant…

“Everything’s fine, Asuma,” Kakashi answered.

You started to struggle harder, slamming your foot down on his. You finally broke free from his grasp and took off at full speed for the forest just outside of Konoha. Multiple people called out your name, but it didn’t even reach your ears.

‘This can’t be happening! This has to be some sick nightmare! Everything I’ve worked so hard for is being broken down before my eyes. All because of that damn Jiraiya. No, it’s not his fault, it’s mine,‘

You landed on a tree branch a hundred miles outside of Konoha, breathing heavy. Your head was lowered as you fell to your knees, clutching your stomach.

‘It’s my fault. If I would have kept my mouth shut… I never should have told anyone. It’s my own fault this is happening. I should have been more careful. I shouldn’t have let my emotions get the best of me. How could I have forgotten what Itachi had taught me?’

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

Flashback

As a young child, you ran through the forest, searching for your elder friend. He was the big brother you had always wanted and you knew you could confide in him with anything and everything you might need.

“Are you looking for me, Y/N?”

Your face lit up as you ran up to the boy, hugging him tightly. “Itachi! I’ve been looking all over for you.”

“Sorry. I’ve been training.” He smiled, ruffling your hair.

“Ita~chi! You know I hate that!” you pouted. “What are we going to do today, Itachi?”

His smile softened as he held his hand out to you. You put your small hand in his. Itachi led you to a hidden waterfall just outside the village.

“It-It’s beautiful!” your eyes sparkled happily as you took in the sight.

“I thought you might like it.” He picked you up, setting you down on a large rock. “Today, I’m going to teach you a life lesson that you should always keep with you.”

“Alright,” you sat on your knees, giving him your full attention.

“This may not seem to make sense to you now, but it will when you get older.” He paused, “You should always hide your emotions from others. Never let anyone get to close to your heart. Never show your emotions to people. It’ll only end with you being hurt or killed. You should remain emotionless at all times.”

“Alright, Itachi.” you smiled brightly, throwing your arms around his middle.

He smiled sadly, gently rubbing your head.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

“How could I forget something so important?” you whispered harshly to yourself.

“Forget what?”

You jumped in surprise, nearly falling out of the tree. You had been so wrapped up in your thoughts, you hadn’t noticed Shikamaru approaching you, a look of concern on his face.

You stared at the ground sadly. “Itachi taught me once… that I should always keep my emotions hidden. That I shouldn’t let anyone get close to my heart.”

“Why would you want to do that? Look at how he and Sasuke turned out. Do you really wanna be like that?” His voice was soft.

“It’d save me a lot of emotional trouble,” you muttered under your breath.

“Is this about that rumor going around?”

You didn’t respond, but he noticed how your body tensed at the mention of it.

He walked closer and you stepped back. This continued until your back was against the trunk of the tree. He reached up, his hand resting gently on your cheek. His eyes met yours and you couldn’t look away.  “You really are a troublesome person,” he sighed, a smile slipping onto his face. “But I do love you.”

“W-What?” your eyes widened, heart pounding in your chest.

He smiled, bringing your face closer to his own. “You heard me, Y/N. I’m in love with you and I know you love me, too. I’ve always known. I didn’t need a rumor to tell me that.”

“Shika…” you whispered, unable to stop the tears from rolling down your cheeks. He moved closer, his lips ghosting over your own. “I… I love you so much it hurts…”

“I know,” he whispered back, pushing his lips against your own. He cupped your cheeks, thumbs wiping away your tears. You grabbed a handful of his shirt, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss.

After a few minutes, he pulled away. “You’re mine now, Y/N.”

You smiled through the tears, hiding your face in his chest. He wrapped his arms around you, holding you close.

‘Maybe… maybe Itachi was wrong after all.’

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[koreanboyswriting]

The X Pt. 4

Genre: Gang/Mafia AU - Angstyyy and Fluffy af

Parts: 1 | 2 | 3

Words: 6.2k

Pairing: Wonho x Reader x Shownu (feat. Hyungwon, Kihyun, and Changkyun)

✨ Notes: I miss Wonho every fucking day, and I will continue to write for him and about him, I hope you guys respect this. It’s ot7 till I die bitches. Also had to end it with Kihyun, happy birthday to the cutest little hamster who lights up my life. ✨

Things get more serious for you with Wonho, but you still can’t shake Shownu. Will he fall for you or expose you to everyone?

Wonho was holding Shownu by the back of his suit jacket, and Shownu looked murderous. Shownu jumped to his feet quickly and shook his arms forward ripping the back of his jacket out of Wonho’s hands and grabbed the front of his shirt.

“Do not touch me.” Shownu growled lowly into Wonho’s face.

Wonho grabbed Shownu’s hands and pulled them from his shirt slowly, his eyes steel.

“I’ll do whatever I want when you’re attacking my girl.”

“Your girl?” Shownu practically whispered.

Wonho stepped closer to Shownu, so they were nose to nose, Shownu’s fist was clenched and you jumped out of your seat. You scrambled out of the car, your dress scrunching up your thighs as your heels skidded on the wet tar.

“Hey, hey, hey, guys, please.” You got in between them and pushed on their chests until they reluctantly separated.

“Shownu wasn’t attacking me, okay?” You said looking into Wonho’s eyes and he just sighed and relaxed his fists. “Now you should apologize to Shownu.” Wonho looked affronted and surprised that you would have the audacity to talk down to him like a mother, but the realization overruled your comment and he apologized.

“It’s whatever,” Shownu said quietly and left, holding one of Wonho’s shoulders for a second before he slipped back into the limo and it sped off into the nighttime traffic.

You sighed and hugged yourself in the cold air that was prickling your arms now that you were out of the warm limo’s embrace. Wonho put a hand on your back and guided you inside, the door man silently holding open the overlarge door. The pair of you stayed quiet as Wonho guided you upstairs to your apartment, once you were inside and set your clutch, the iPhone box, and your shoes down you looked at Wonho unsure of what to say, the words ”my girl” still ringing in your head.

“Look, I’m sorry. I don’t own you, and I shouldn’t have behaved that way, you don’t have to explain anything to me, we’re not together you don’t owe me anything. And yeah, I just-- I don’t know what came over me…” Wonho trailed off looking at his hands as you walked over and enveloped him in a hug.

He just held you as you laid your head on his shoulder. Wonho just always said the right things as if he could read the thoughts that passed through your eyes. He gave what you wanted when you wanted it and nothing when you didn’t. You never had to second guess what he was thinking because he would let you know, unlike others. It felt easy with him but for some reason Shownu was like a shadow trailing you, attached to you for some reason, always in the dark.

Wonho picked you up and cradled you in his arms as soon as you were starting to think you could fall asleep there and took you to your room. He set you down on your bed and walked into your closet, coming out with a little black nightgown in his hands. You pulled it over your head and pulled off the straps of the dress you were wearing and shimmied it down your legs as Wonho walked to the bathroom. The navy dress hit the floor and you sat up and crossed your legs as Wonho returned with a makeup wipe in his hands. You smiled gratefully at him and he winked and left again as you wiped all the makeup off your face, the scent of vanilla lingering from the wipe. You tossed it into the bin by the door as Wonho returned again with a hair brush in his hand. He leaned against the bed and looked at you, asking “may I?” with his eyes, you nodded, and he climbed into bed with you. You turned around so you were facing the headboard and pulled a pillow into your lap as he started to comb through your hair. You sighed and relaxed your shoulders.

“Are you okay?” Wonho asked quietly.

You licked your lips and shrugged, “I don’t know, I just feel confused. I never expected any of this to happen. I really didn’t. And now I feel bad, because I incited one thing and not the other and I feel like I brought it on myself.”

“Shhh… Never feel like any of this is your fault. I know who Shownu really is. He likes to project the idea of the lone wolf, but he really relies on us and I know our bond is unbreakable. So, he might be upset right now, but we’ll move on like we always do. As for what happened between you guys tonight, like I said, I don’t need to know in fact, I don’t want to. Your life is your life, you don’t owe me anything,” Wonho said simply as if it was common sense.

You turned around and looked into Wonho’s soft brown eyes and said, “It was nothing, I promise you.” Wonho smiled and you pressed a light kiss onto his lips and Wonho circled his arms around you and pulled you close peppering kisses all over your face till you laughed and you both laid in your bed together holding each other and talking until you fell asleep, trying to believe yourself that Shownu was nothing, but then again Wonho was supposed to be nothing too.

***

When you woke up the next morning Wonho was gone, all that remained of the muscular cuddle-y man was a note on your pillow that said, “I had a good time last night, x.” You smiled to yourself and rolled over to place the note on the side table. You picked up your new iPhone that sat there and rolled it in your hands. It was a huge upgrade from the simple one you had before. There was a message waiting when you lifted it up to your face. Shownu had texted you that you would be working at the Indigo Flower that night because they needed the help after losing a server. You texted back “ok” and waited with the messaging app open for a minute to see if he would respond. The read receipt came up and that was all you received.

You walked around the apartment admiring the beauty of it in the light of day. The floors were cold and a deep rich colored hard wood, and the wall opposite the kitchen was exposed brick with a large floor to ceiling window right in the middle that looked out onto the street below. The whole apartment was eclectic and beautiful and was fashionable yet cozy and you could tell that someone had outfitted it and picked every piece with love and care.

You made yourself a simple breakfast with what was in the kitchen and sat down at the table eating in silence occasionally scrolling through your phone. The silence was deafening, and it was the first time you really felt alone. You had been surrounded by people almost every moment since you had arrived, and it had been a nice buffer to not really think about what you were supposed to be doing and what was actually going in your life before you had left. You were married to the job. You didn’t have any friends besides your fellow officers and the last time you had a relationship was in high school before the academy. And now here you were surrounded by two beautiful men trying to figure out what the hell you were supposed to be doing and who was actually at fault here. Your fork slipped off the table and that’s when you realized you had been daydreaming as you were thinking about all the problems in your life.

You picked up your dishes and rested them in the sink silently promising yourself that you would do them later as you jumped into your bed pulling the covers up to your chin turning on the tv and letting your mind wander. After all, you were supposed to be staying under the radar and you couldn’t remember the last time you had most of your day off.

***

You must have fallen asleep because you woke up to loud gunshots. You jumped off the bed resting into your fighting stance when you heard more gunshots and realized it was just coming from the crime show that was on the tv. You laughed at your stupid self and rubbed your eyes roughly. Looking at the clock on the side table you realized it was almost time for work, so you went over to the bathroom and got cleaned up. As you pulled your brush through your hair you thought about how Wonho had done it last night. Then you brushed your hands over your cheeks thinking about the kisses that he peppered across your face, and it felt nice to feel like this, giddy and warm at the thought of someone’s touch. But you had a job to do, and this was beyond unprofessional. Or maybe it wasn’t, maybe it was necessary to get the information you need. Or maybe you were just a stupid girl who would open your legs for anyone who treated you decent, desperate for love. You went with the last one, being self-deprecating made you feel better for all the indulgence you were allowing yourself to partake in.

You decided to walk once you got outside and felt the chilly breeze on your face, it felt like a wakeup call. The sky was darkening, and the lights were beginning to glow from the store windows ad signs, and you reminded yourself that a man was killed not too long ago from a place not too far from where you were heading to work. You shoved your hands in the pockets of the luxurious coat you found in the closet and put your head down as you walked the mile and a half to the Indigo Flower. You assured yourself as you walked that tonight would be the night for less talking and more listening. There had to be answers somewhere. Someone knows something and you were going to found out who it is.

When you saw the large neon sign of the Indigo Flower in your periphery, you hopped around the puddles in the street to you got to the other sidewalk and rushed in. A cute young boy was at the podium this time and he smiled cutely at you, before waving, and you noticed all the silver rings he wore on each hand.

“How can I help you this evening ma’am,” he said, an accent lilting his tone, one that you couldn’t place, it sounded somewhere in between a soft British accent mixed with American.

“Oh no,” you shook off your coat and hung it over your left arm and reached out to shake his hand. “I’m Lydia, I started here the other night, I’ve also been working at the club, Shownu told me to come here tonight though.”

“Oh, you’re Lydia,” the boy shook your hand and adjusted his wire framed round glasses. “I’m Shownu’s little brother Changkyun.

You smiled and tried to hide your excitement that you clicked together another piece in the puzzle that is Shownu. Changkyun started talking to you about the restaurant and wondering out loud what you would be doing tonight when Hyungwon sauntered up to the front. He looked beautiful in a silk black shirt that was tucked into crisp black slacks with platform loafers. He looked easy and casual and walked with grace. You smiled easily at him and he winked back playfully.

“Lydia, come with me. Changkyun go find those menu inserts I told you to do an hour ago, I need a hundred more,” Changkyun rolled his eyes and smirked at you before leaving the podium.

You walked in line with Hyungwon glancing around the restaurant, noticing how busy it was for the first time.

“How are you with serving?” Hyungwon asked as soon as you made it through the swinging kitchen doors.

“I’m pretty good, served at a diner for two years of high school. I’ll never forget the muscle memory of holding a tray over my shoulder,” you said with a laugh.

Hyungwon smiled. “Great, here’s your shirt and apron go change, and ask Changkyun which section needs more coverage.”

You nodded and opened your mouth to ask another question but Hyungwon had already turned on his heel and was shouting at a cook that he plated the noodles wrong.

You shrugged, walked to the staff bathroom in the back and changed quickly putting on the button up that had a small indigo flower embroidered over the right chest pocket area. You tied the apron securely, smoothed your hair back into a ponytail and walked out. Servers zoomed around you with quick efficiency and you walked past a rack full of supplies. You snagged a notepad and pen and shoved them into your apron and grabbed a tray as you passed a stack. When you walked back out, Changkyun was sitting a group of giggling girls who were throwing him flirty looks, you laughed to yourself as he winked to them and walked away.

You both met at the podium at the same time and you cracked up laughing before you could help yourself and Changkyun shoved your shoulder. “Sorry Casanova, don’t want to ruin the game you got going there,” you said between laughs, holding your hands up in surrender.

Changkyun rolled his eyes. “Let’s just find what section you need to work in miss.”

He pulled a seating chart up on the iPad that was propped up on the podium. Every table was either green, or red, and had server’s names attached to groups of four or five tables. One server in the back had eight and all of them were red which Changkyun said meant they were occupied. He cut the servers section in half and typed your name into the computer, so half of them were now yours.

“Ok, those tables are yours now, those are the ones next to the large flower painting in the back room. Just let Gia know as soon as I seat someone at those next, they’re yours.”

You nodded and ran the table numbers over and over again in your head. As you walked into the back. The petite girl you assumed was Gia was zipping between the tables. Her face slightly pink and her ponytail falling loose from where it was likely perched at the top of her head.

You waved at her and she came speed walking over, “What’s up? What do you need?” She asked visibly harried.

“Nothing, I’m here to help you, I’m taking the left half of your section as soon as the tables leave. Do you need help with anything?”

She tucked her hair behind her ear and grabbed my shoulder, “Oh thank god, you can take table 422 right now if you want it, I’ve only taken their drink orders. And can you get 421’s food.” She rummaged through her apron pulling out her pad and rifling through it till she found the one with 421 scribbled across the top.

“Here,” she tore it off and handed it to you, “you’re an angel thanks.” And then she was off zipping back to another table.

You went and got the food first dropping it off for the hungry looking recipients who thanked you and tucked in. You greeted the last table and feigned knowledge about the entrees suggesting ones that were more expensive, so you’d get a bigger tip, just like you used at the diner. You succeeded and scribbled down their requests and took it to the back.

The rest of the night flowed as easily as it began. As Gia got less stressed, she helped you more and gave you pointers while you talked at the cash registers. Before you knew it, it was already 12 a.m. and the restaurant was empty. Changkyun was acting suave for Gia as he wiped down a table, she wasn’t having it, she just laughed and threw her rag at him. The rest of the servers had already left, except for a couple who were cleaning in the back with the cooks and Hyungwon sat at one of the booths, his feet propped up next him as he counted money and typed numbers into a large old-school calculator that printed out receipts from the top.

You walked into the back to grab more cleaning solution and two of the cooks were dancing to mariachi music and shaking their hips as they tossed the contents of their pans. You laughed and looked around at the other three servers that were back there and asked them why they were still cooking.

“Oh, it’s for family dinner. We’re adding some new things to menu, I think. Once were done cleaning, we’ll all eat in the dining area,” said a pretty tall girl who’s name you didn’t know.

You nodded and smiled and walked out to get the last row of tables while Gia was sweeping and Changkyun was still wiping tables. When you guys were all done you flopped down at one of the big tables in the center dining area and the chefs came out with the other servers. They put pans upon pans at the table and your stomach rumbled with hunger. Hyungwon joined all the wait and kitchen staff at the table and everyone was eating soundly when Shownu strided in. His dress shoes softly clacking on the marble floors.

He sat himself without a word and started pulling the food towards him. He began eating and one of the cooks started talking to him, waving his hands animatedly and pointing at the food. Everyone else was talking on acting as if they had never stopped to see Shownu come in. You could feel his eyes on you as you ate, but you were determined not to make eye contact. Hyungwon filled up your wine glass further and you smiled and drank it gratefully. It felt like his eye were burning a hole into the side of your head, but you looked right at Changkyun and forced yourself to listen to what he was saying.

“I mean I could have asked for their numbers if I wanted to, but I didn’t. It’s all about balance,” he said with a smirk. Hyungwon just rolled his eyes and chuckled.

“So, how’s the restaurant doing?” You asked Hyungwon.

“We’re doing good. We definitely don’t make as much money as the club, but we do well. We have a steady client base.” He said as he picked at a stray string on his shirt cuff.

You nodded trying to find other topics in your head to discuss, but you felt the ability to small talk had suddenly flew from your head. Perhaps it had landed where Shownu was because all you could think about was him, and whether or not he was onto you, because his stare said more than his mouth ever did. Before you could speak again Hyungwon did.

“So, Kihyun told me about what you did at the meeting the other night, that was amazing. Good thinking.” Hyungwon said quietly, smiling at you with his eyes.

You drained your glass and Changkyun filled it back up this time.

You laughed, “Jeez, you guys trying to get me drunk?!”

Changkyun laughed, “Better you than me and we need to finish this bottle somehow.”

You rolled your eyes and sipped your red anyway. Slowly as the wine filled your system, you got less anxious about Shownu watching you, and then forgot about him entirely as you enjoyed the company of Changkyun, Hyungwon, and Gia.

“And then, once Shownu realized that it was me who stole his bear stickers and not Wonho, who he had been chasing around the yard for 30 MINUTES, he tried to beat me up and Wonho wrestled him to the ground till he gave up.” Changkyun said between laughs, his eyes watering.

Hyungwon was clutching his stomach as he brushed at his eyes. Gia was holding her napkin over her face which was so red you didn’t even know that that was a shade that existed. Shownu came up behind Changkyun and put his hands on his shoulders, squeezing them till Changkyun wiggled out of his grasp.

“Hey now, let’s not tell all the family stories next thing I know you’ll be talking about the tattoo I have on my ass.” Shownu said quietly.

Gia burst and snorted so hard it renewed everyone’s laughs again, even Shownu started laughing, and it was nice to see openness to his eyes.

You looked down at the table and realized it was empty, one of the servers came back in and took the rest of the plates off the table. Once everyone had calmed down, Gia picked up her purse and her coat and told everyone she needed to go home and relieve her husband of baby duties. We all told her to get home safe. Next to go was Hyungwon, he grabbed Shownu’s shoulder and whispered something in his ear before he picked up his receipt book and calculator and winked at you on the way out. You started to get up, not wanting to be left alone with Shownu, but when you stood you stumbled dizzily. Changkyun jumped up and caught your elbow and you laughed standing upright.

“I’m fine, sorry. I probably need to get home now too.” You tried not to look too flustered as you looked around for your purse. You noticed it in the booth where Hyungwon had been counting checks earlier and walked over to it, losing your balance twice.

“Why don’t you go home Changkyun, I’ll drive her home.” Shownu said behind you quietly.

“I don’t think I should drive though,” said Changkyun swaying where he stood.

“You don’t have to. Alex is outside in your car,” said Shownu.

“Oh, okay…” Changkyun grabbed his phone off the table, looked at Shownu weirdly and waved at you before he walked out.

“You know I can get home myself,” you said quietly trying not to show that you were leaning on the table for support.

“I didn’t say that you couldn’t. I said I’m taking you home.” Shownu said while walking towards you.

You swallowed thickly and kept your hands clutched on your purse. Shownu just prowled towards you and grabbed your wrist and steered you towards the door. He hit the lights, and pulled you outside grabbing some keys from his pocket and locking the door quickly. You looked around and noticed the long limo parked on the curb that was polished so perfectly it reflected the Indigo Flower sign like a mirror. As you had assumed it was for you. The driver got out and opened the door and once again Shownu steered you towards the car.

You yanked your arm out his grasp as soon as you sat down. “Don’t grab me like that, I’m an adult not a child,” you said your voice cold.

Shownu didn’t say anything, he just looked at you for a second and closed the door behind him. As soon as it clicked shut you were off. You sat back and put on your seatbelt. You glanced up at Shownu again and he was staring straight ahead. You rubbed your wrist, it didn’t hurt, just bothered you more than anything. Like Wonho said, neither of them owned you, so you weren’t about to let Shownu act like he did.

“Sorry,” Shownu said barely audible.

Then he rolled up the partition and the driver did not seem to notice. You swallowed again and fidgeted closer to the window. It was a silent car ride and when the limo stopped you looked out the window to a beautiful neighborhood of sky-scraping glass buildings, almost like an apartment neighborhood for millionaires.

“Where are we,” you asked Shownu. “This isn’t my place.”

“I know that. It’s mine.” He said looking at you directly for the first time.

You sighed, “Look, Shownu. I’m tired, can we talk about yesterday later? I don’t have the energy right now.”

“No, we need to talk now. You’re going to come up whether you like it or not.” Shownu growled.

You looked over at him and his eyes were a dark abyss. A new look you hadn’t seen before.

“Shownu, please. I just want to go to sleep,” you pleaded.

“And you will one way or another, after we talk. Now get out of the car before I have you removed from it,” said Shownu.

You looked at him confused, but he had already opened his door. You unbuckled your seatbelt and followed suit trying to stay calm. Shownu was already at the door, so you quickly shuffled over and followed him into the building. The lobby was all marble, glass, and maroon accents. Like a chic modern take on a hunter’s lodge, only less wood. It felt sterile, you weren’t sure if you liked it or not. There was an elevator attendant and once he saw Shownu he bowed his head and clicked the floor button without Shownu having to say a word.

You glanced at the buttons and realized without surprise that you were going all the way up to the 40th floor. Of course, Shownu had the penthouse.

When the doors opened, the view looked out to a pristine bachelor pad. Black sleek couches, a wood and glass coffee table, fur carpet. White and gold accented kitchen, an all glass table with what looked like an antique Persian rug underneath. It was almost perfect, but it had the feeling of not being lived in. Shownu walked to the kitchen and pointed towards the dining table.

“Sit down,” he almost whispered.

“Excuse me?” You asked.

“Lydia, you fucking heard me, sit down.” He growled.

He was onto you. He had to be. But what had exposed you? Had he followed you that night you saw Detective Cooper? No. He couldn’t have, he was just as worried as Wonho was. But then again maybe he was acting, he’s not the first person in this room to tell a lie. If you were going to get through this, you were going to have to be convincing as hell. You watched Shownu’s broad shoulders as he turned from you and opened up a random drawer. There was a key code at the top, he punched in the numbers so fast you couldn’t see what it was. When the drawer cover slid back there was black Glock 21 sitting in the drawer, a wad of hundreds, and you realized with horror, your pocketknife you had thought you lost.

He held it up it his hand and left the drawer wide open, almost like a warning. “Do you know what this is?” He said incredibly quiet.

“Yes, it’s a pocketknife,” you said trying to be nonchalant, though your buzz was fading rapidly.

“Do you know what kind of pocketknife it is,” said Shownu.

You tried to look bewildered, “Shownu, what’s going on?”

He flicked it open with ease and you jumped a little, “It’s a police grade knife. Do you know where they sell these?” He asked his voice at a steady level now.

“No, Shownu, I don’t,” you said evenly, trying to sound a little annoyed.

Shownu walked closer flipping the knife in his hand. “They only sell these well-balanced knives at two stores in New York City. Do you know where they sell police equipment in New York City Lydia?”

Shownu was standing right in front of you, just arms-length away now. “Shownu, I don’t understand why you are asking me these questions!” You shouted looking flustered.

“DON’T FUCKING LIE TO ME!” Shownu shouted slamming the knife down so hard on the table the entire thing quaked. You pressed yourself into the back of your chair, frozen to it.

“Minhyuk found this little knife in the dressing room at the club. You were the only one staying there, and it was never there before you were.” Shownu stepped closer closing the gap so you had to look straight up at him. “And the special things about these knives is that they have a serial number on them so that cops can track them between each other if they get lost. And that’s why they are specially made and only sold at two police outfitting stores in New York City.”

“Now, I could take this to any store, and persuade the salesclerk to let me know which badge number is associated with this serial number on this knife, and he would tell me. But here I am giving you a chance to prove me wrong. So, am I Lydia? Am I wrong? Is there a reason you have a police knife as cocaine seller, because you’re the cleanest cocaine addict I’ve ever seen. It’s almost like you never were one.” Shownu finished and set the knife down every so gently on the glass tabletop.

Your eyes started watering and you didn’t try to stop it you left yourself breath through it as if you were and right when you could have reigned it in you let it loose and started lightly crying, enough to be believable, but you didn’t want it to be over the top, you needed to sell this.

“Back when I was 16 my older brother graduated the police academy and entered the force. They put him on special victims, which is rape, pedophilia, kidnapping, child crimes, you know the works, all the terrible shit.” You paused and sniffled, Shownu stood in front of you still, though he took a step back and his gaze was still steely.

“He worked really hard. He loved catching the bad guys and putting them away and he was good at it. After about a year there my brother was getting pretty run down, apparently it was common knowledge that nobody lasted much longer than a year in special victims, so my brothers time was running out.

“He wasn’t excited about work anymore. He was always tired, and he didn’t want to talk about anything that happened at work. Then one day he was on a case trying to crack a pedophile ring, they were kidnapping young girls and trading them between each other, and every time they thought they had a concrete number of people, it just kept getting bigger.

“My brother worked on the case nonstop. And then they cracked it, they hacked into their site and got the email addresses and billing addresses for all the members of their creepy little club and found where they would be trading little girls that night. They assembled a team and were very well prepared to go in. My brother being one of the lead detectives obviously made sure he was a part of it even though he hadn’t been sleeping much as he worked on the case.”

Shownu, who sensed your dip in tone sat down, his eyes still concealing every feeling.

You took in a deep breath and continued, “Well the creeps got scared as soon as the police stormed into the old factory and they started grabbing their kids and running. A couple of them had guns and were firing shots at random. My brother cornered one into a room that split off the main floor, and he told him to freeze, and he did. He was holding a little girl by her wrist and she looked horrible, my brother said she couldn’t have been more than 6.

“My brother told him that he could go if he just let the girl go because he knew they had the place surrounded and he would get caught anyway. The guy made a move that he thought was going to endanger the girl, so he tried to shoot him, but he was so tired and the girl was so scared she just froze as her captor jumped behind her. My brother killed that little girl. It wasn’t his fault, at least he didn’t mean to, it just all happened so fast.” You sobbed a little harder, not faking it this time.

“And no one blamed him, the guy was armed and there had been reasonable danger, he was cleared, but it never left him. He eventually retired early, but no one did anything! He wasn’t fine and you could see it! I tried to get therapy included in his benefits, but they wouldn’t allow it, and he just faded away from me. I tried to check up on him, but I didn’t have the time to do that every day, and the one day I couldn’t he shot himself in the head in his garage.”

You rubbed your eyes roughly and sniffled, “No one cared, they wanted him to be fine, so they pretended he was fine. They killed him, the police did that to him,” you said harshly.

“That’s his knife, I keep it with me as a reminder of how fucked the system is. I hate them, I hate everything they ever did to him. It’s their fault,” you tried to stop crying, rubbing at every tear that fell.

“I started doing drugs after that. I got clean after I realized that my boyfriend was trying to control me with it. I’ve been clean for months now. I don’t want it anymore, I just want to be me again,” you said softly.

Before Shownu could say anything, you grabbed the knife off of his table, flicked the blade close, and got up. Shownu was still staring at you, though his eyes weren’t as hard.

“I assume we’re done here right?” You shoved the knife into your pocket and walked towards the doors rubbing at your eyes with the sleeve of your jacket.

You had just opened the door when Shownu grabbed your wrist again. You tugged your hand roughly out of his grasp.

“I told you not to grab me like that,” you growled.

Shownu pushed the door closed and pulled you into a hug, almost picking you up, his hands firm around your waist. You instinctively wrapped your hands around his neck lightly. You had hoped he would let go after a second, but he just buried his face into your shoulder and gripped you tighter. You relaxed and held him closer resting your head onto his shoulder and before you knew it you were crying, really crying. Big heaving sobs racked your body and you pulled Shownu closer to you as you sobbed freely onto his shoulder. He just clutched you tightly and when your feet were about to give out from standing, he scooped you into his arms and carried you to his bedroom. He deposited you onto his bed and walked over to his dresser and pulled out a t-shirt and handed it to you.

You looked at it and smiled softly but handed it back to him. “Thanks Shownu, but I should go home.”

“No, just stay,” he said barely whispering.

You wanted to protest, but you also didn’t want to be alone. You never talked about your brother, you barely even talked to your parents about him anymore. You all pretended like it didn’t happen.

You tugged the shirt over your head and unbuttoned the work shirt you were wearing as Shownu walked towards his restroom. You shimmied out of your pants and looked around the room. The walls were a dark navy and all the decorations were white. Sheer curtains, leather armchairs and wood furnishings, it was effortlessly comfy, you already felt yourself getting sleepy. Shownu walked back in the room shirtless and you fought the urge to suck in a breath. You just pulled the covers quickly over your body and sequestered yourself to the left side of it.

“No cuddling,” you said softly and shoved a pillow against your back, like a makeshift wall.

Shownu chuckled and put his hands up in surrender before he climbed into the bed. You stared at the wall for a minute listening to Shownu’s breathing, and right when you felt like you could fall asleep Shownu extended over his hand and grabbed yours lightly, rubbing circles into the back of your hand, it was exactly what you needed, and you fell asleep instantly, feeling strangely safe.

***

When you woke in the morning the only person in the bed was you. You sat up and stretched looking around the room in the daylight, it looked just as pretty. It felt like it glowed even with the dark walls. You slid out of the bed and heard a voice in the next room. The door was left open a little and you tiptoed in unsure of what was going on. You couldn’t see anyone in the kitchen, so you opened the door more and there was Kihyun sitting at the desk that was next to the large window that took up the entire back wall. His feet were propped up on the desk and he had just hung up on his phone call and was looking directly at you.

“Well, you’re someone I was definitely not expecting to see.”