#i know i add that tag to everything i just think its funny

[poscariastri]

ive been making f1 drivers as tumblr posts and its highly entertaining to me

[stonyponyofficial]

i love seeing how much paratext i can fit into the tags. read my footnotes boy

[rainingincale]

No one:

Me: so funny how the origins of many of my tags were very random and have ended up sticking and also influencing the tags i made afterwards-

[lovifie]

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Hi, this a post about callsigns characters could have because I love "cool" sounding nicknames with the most stupid backstory:

Rat: Because when you first entered the team you were so shy that when you weren't on a mission they could only see you scurrying out of a room whenever they entered like a little mouse. Plus, Gaz keeps saying you look like the rat from the Wallace and Gromit movie when eating breakfast.

Knockout/Knock: Because Soap and you were playing around, he was following you and you were running so fast you didn't notice the door was locked and you ran into it so hard you knocked yourself out.

Icarus: You made fun of Ghost for being British and about how they always burn when they tan only for you to go and get such an aggressive sunburn you were required to take medical leave for two weeks.

Pudding: After a mission you were craving it so bad that you didn't care that the only one left was way past its recommended date for eating. And after reassuring them that you would be fine you ended up throwing up so hard late at night that you woke up everybody.

Mole: Because when you are not wearing your glasses you are so blind they wonder how did you even made it into the military. Many people think you are just a spy that the task force kept as a pet.

Pierrot: Which is a sad clown, often pining for the love of Columbine, who usually breaks his heart and leaves him for Harlequin. And since that's basically a compilation of your love life that became your name, a sad clown but in Italian.

Anakin: You tried to download one of the Star Wars movies from a not-so-trustworthy website, you ended up downloading such a massive amount of viruses that you were almost the reason for the downfall of the whole military because of how aggressive the hack attack was. You now have parental control on everything that has internet access.

Navi: As in the fairy that travels with Link on the Legend of Zelda. Because every time that you would try to de-escalate an argument you would start like: "Hey, listen, we are all tired." "Hey, listen, let's all take a breath." "Hey, listen, we are all adults."

Gecko: Because while sleeping on deployment a gecko fell on your face from the ceiling, and you became so terrified of them that you barely slept for months after that.

Baby: Do you know when you accidentally call your teacher "mom"? Well, it happened to you, but you called Price "dad" and he didn't skip a beat before answering "Yes, babygirl?"

I could go on and on with these, I hope you find it at least half as funny as I do. Feel free to use them however you want and to add to the list as well, please I'll love to read them. 🩷🩷

Also, I would definitely be Mole, my blind ass would shoot and wish for the best. Which one would you guys be?? Also, Knockout and Icarus are my favourite ones and the reason I made the post hehe

Also, the rat I mentioned:

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[damn-stark]

Chapter 10 Heart of Ice

Chapter 10 of Moonlight

A/N- I was giggling and kicking my feet tehehe ;)

Warning- some swearing, talks of miscarriage and death, ANGST!, FLUFF, mild NFSW, SPOILERS, LONG CHAPTER.

Pairing- Aemond Targaryen x Velaryon!fem-reader, Cregan Stark x Velaryon!fem-reader

Episode- 2x01

(If you want to be tagged let me know)

————

There it is, standing so tall that it looks like it’s touching the sky. It’s mesmerizing no matter how many times you’ve seen it, and it never fails to steal your breath.

Yet the wall is at its prettiest when it weeps when the sun hits it just as it rises from the ground. Right now all it does is bring forth an icier chill as the wind blows, making you hold onto your cloak for warmth.

You can only imagine how Jacaerys is fairing, this is his first time at Castle Black.

“How are you holding up?” You make sure to ask your brother as his eyes stay stuck on the towering wall.

“My balls are about to freeze off,” he makes no effort to talk properly in front of you, nor do you remind him to.

You smile at him and look at him with a soft endearment only reserved for those you deeply cherish. “It will be worth it, I promise. I cannot wait for you to see it,” you muse and cup his shoulder.

Jacaerys finally takes his eyes off the wall and meets your gaze with such a warm smile that it’s capable of melting the thickest sheets of ice.

“It better live up to everything you have said,” he remarks lightheartedly, making you drop your head to laugh softly at the ground.

“It will pass your expectations,” Cregan interjects as he finally rejoins you and leads the way to the lift that looks a bit unreliable, but all the people at Castle Black use it, and you have survived after using it so, you walk in. Slowly of course, and you don’t dare pay too much attention to the sounds it makes as it starts moving Jacaerys, Cregan, and you to the top.

“You know,” you take the attention of the rackety noise. “Perhaps one day I will send one of my children over here to take up a role as guardian of the wall.”

“Is that so?” Cregan probes.

“One of your seven?” Jacaerys jokes and you laugh softly but don’t take back what you said, catching him by some surprise.

“It’s a rare thing for a Targaryen or Velaryon to come be a brother of the Night's Watch,” you explain your thought process to the curious men. “But we are the families the people look up to. I mean I understand the sacrifice, but I believe that for us to have a good relation with the North, and for us to protect our realm against what may be out there, we too should be here with a dragon or two.”

Cregan briefly meets your gaze and hides well those emotions you stir up inside since your brother is standing at his other side, but he doesn’t stay quiet, he takes a deep breath before he parts his lips.

“You are right, the sacrifice one must commit is great, but duty is sacrifice,” Cregan begins to say. “It eclipses all things, even blood. All men of honor must pay its price. The North owes a great duty to the Seven Kingdoms, one older than any oath. Since the day of the first men, we have stood as guardians against the cold and the dark. Through its long tradition, the Night's Watch cultivated its strength from doomed men who had their life as their only possession. But my ancestor, Torrhen Stark began a tradition by making an offering at the onset of winter; one in 10 men from our household was to be chosen to fortify the Watch. This is not a sentence but an honor. A duty embraced by all who serve the North. Even by mine own kin. Thus I respect your decision, My Princess.”

He talks so well that even these long comments captivate you, and that’s hard to do because you get so easily bored.

“The North must stand ready,” Cregan adds without losing a breath. “Winter is coming.”

“Coming?” Jacaerys interjects. “What is this, then, that falls from the skies and shivers my bones?”

You roll your eyes away and scoff softly.

He thinks he’s so funny.

“This is only a late summer snow, my prince,” Cregan says something he’s already mentioned once before. “In winter, it will cover all you see and all memories of warmth will be forgotten.”

You look through the gaps on the wooden walls but the lift then shakes so you step back and stand closer to Cregan.

“It pleases me to think that over a century ago our ancestors treated in this very place,” Jacaerys mentions with a lighthearted look on his face. “The Conqueror and the King in the North.”

You can’t help but smile at the thought and the history the Starks share with your ancestors. It’s so bittersweet. But it’s all so corny of Jacaerys to say, he sounds just as infatuated as you.

You would tease him, but now doesn’t seem like the time so you just smile wider to yourself.

Cregan’s gaze wanders to you after your brother's words, and you share some of that sweetness with him because regardless of it all, you are happy Jacaerys expressed his fondness for Cregan.

And when Cregan does see your smile some of that hardened demeanor melts.

“You, at least had the mercy not to threaten me with your dragon,” Cregan quips at your brother jokingly, leaving him silent until he queries.

“Did my sister threaten you with her dragon?”

Does he think of you as some wild beast or something?

Regardless, Cregan's eyes soften before he shakes his head and tells him what you did do. “No, but she did threaten to go over the wall and escape when she first got to Winterfell six years ago.” He says and tilts his head over to you, but you look out the window and shake your head.

“I was having a hard time adjusting,” you remind him. “And I did not end up going over the wall.”

“No,” he mutters softer as if speaking with admiration. “You did not.”

You lift your eyes off the icy wall and let yourself meet and hold his gaze with a soft look just until the lift finally lands on the top because when it comes to a sudden halt the wooden lift shakes, and you’re reminded why you hate coming to the top this way—You almost reach out to Cregan to keep yourself balanced and safe, but you stop yourself and just stand stiffly until finally he opens the door for you and your brother, letting you feel like you can breathe again when you’re on stable ground.

“My Prince, My Princess,” one of the brothers greets you while you slip your arm around your brothers to hold onto more warmth as the coldness nips at your skin.

“My Lord.”

“My Lord,” other brothers greet Cregan while he walks after you until finally he catches up and leads you to one side.

“Surely the great Torrhen Stark would’ve sooner died than bent the knee,” you chose to return to the previous topic as you watch Jacaerys’ eyes fall on every single detail you pass by. “Unless he believed the Conqueror could bring unity to the Seven Kingdoms.”

Cregan nods. “You are right in that,” he agrees.

“That unity is now threatened,” Jacaerys goes on for you with another clever workaround to the subject at hand. “The realm will soon tear itself apart if men do not remember the oaths sworn to King Viserys and to his rightful heir.”

Again you can’t help but be proud of the way he speaks. But you also know this second attempt won’t mend Cregan Stark’s choice.

“Stark’s do not forget their oaths, my Prince,” Cregan reminds him proudly. “But you must know that my gaze is forever torn between North and South.”

Jacaerys glances over at you with discreet disappointment, and you press him an, ‘I told you so’ look right back.

“In winter, my duty to the Wall is even more dire than the one I owe to King’s Landing,” Cregan strengthens his argument. “I need my men here.”

You swallow thickly as you come to a halt just under a post, and Jacaerys turns you around with him to pass Cregan a hard look that furrows his eyebrows. “Whilst your men guard against wildlings and weather the Hightowers plan to usurp the throne,” he remarks.

You grip onto him as a warning for him to calm down, but he doesn’t understand.

“If my mother is to defend her claim,” Jacaerys presses while Cregan guides all of you up the stairs. “To hold the realm united she needs an army. War is coming to the whole of the realm, my lord. We cannot wage it without the support of the North…” Jacaerys trails off when he reaches the top and finally sees with his own eyes the never-ending land beyond the wall, the beauty that you promised, and what you could never fully describe in words.

He moves toward the end of the post and you let your arm slip off his to let him admire for himself the beauty and the mystery that is the North, and the freedom it holds in its cold wilderness.

You can now honestly say you know the pride Cregan felt when he first brought you up here because you feel it. You are not from here, but seeing your brother be so captivated by what’s beyond the wall makes you fill with excitement that you can’t put into words, you can just express it with admiration and awe in your eyes.

Cregan notices and admires you while your brother's attention is far away, and to his surprise, you feel his stare and return his soft gaze while you also let your gloved knuckles brush against each other as you let yourself be swooped up once again by the comfort you have been fighting to feel.

Yet you don’t let yourself get completely carried away, nor do you cross the line by letting your fingers touch, you keep your smile and join your brother's side.

“Was it everything you expected?” You ask before you’re brought back to the cruel reality.

Jacaerys laughs softly and nods. “It was everything you said and more…it feels like I could stay here and admire this forever.”

“It would get cold,” you joke, making him chuckle.

“It would be pleasant,” he murmurs.

You nod in agreement and dread returning to the sore subject, but you will lose yourself.

“I brought your sister, and my father brought King Jaehaerys and Queen Alysanne to see the Wall,” Cregan finally rejoins your company. “His Grace stood at this very outlook and watched as their dragons the greatest power in the world, refused to cross it.”

Jacaerys snaps his head to you and probes for more. “Even adventurous Astraea?”

You look out and nod. “Yes. She perches herself on the wall but never once does she fly over, nor does she dare fly over just to turn. I tried to command her to cross but she disobeyed me,” you back up Cregan's argument and feel a chill crawl down your spine at the reminder.

“Do you think my ancestors built a 700-hundred-foot wall of ice to keep out snow and savages?” Cregan presses your brother in a colder tone that almost works to frighten you.

“What does it keep out?” Jacaerys asks.

Cregan leans in closer to your brother and speaks one word. “Death.”

You swallow back nervously and share your uneasiness with your brother with a simple look that actually helps him let go of some of that tension and ignorance he held.

“I have thousands of graybeards,” Cregan finally offers and breaks the speechless moment between Jacaerys and you. “Who've already seen too many winters. They are well-honed.”

You loll your head to the side and snicker, while Jacaerys says what you were thinking. “So they’re old?”

“I can ready them to march at once,” Cregan assures him and you.

Jacaerys breathes out and accepts the offer. “If your graybeards can fight, the Queen will have them.”

“They will fight hard,” Cregan states with a hint of pride and some faint smugness. “Like Northerners.”

You glance over at him and catch that smugness on his usually serious face and you can’t help your heart from skipping a beat when he glances at you with the same look.

“My Lord,” a man calls for Cregan’s attention, making his face fall hard once again. “A ravens arrived.”

The man approaches the post breathing hard as if in a hurry and hands Cregan a scroll. “Urgent news from Dragonstone,” he announces, making you understand his urgency, and causing you to fall serious and nervous yourself.

But if it is bad news wouldn't it be sent directly to Jacaerys and you?

Maybe?

Unless—

You can’t let yourself think the worst, but you still share your worry with your brother before you watch Cregan unravel the scroll to read what the news is.

He doesn’t take long to read, but it feels like he is reading for eternity in the waiting silence until finally he puts the scroll down and meets your gaze. This time when you lock eyes your heart skips a beat out of worry instead of awe, this time a smugness doesn’t play in his eyes or tug the corner of his lips up, his eyebrows are furrowed and his jaw is clenched like when he makes his face hard, but you can read him clear as day as you simply hold his gaze.

You can see the pity pulling his lips down, and a soft apologetic look in his grey eyes that makes them appear darker. He doesn’t need to say anything for you to know that what he read wasn’t a simple warning or a call home, they’re dark words that he almost but says.

You want to ask, he knows that, he sees your worry heighten in your furrowed brows and parted lips, so with a simple blink his face softens as he gives you sorrow, making your eyes immediately cloud with tears. While in the back, Jacaerys sees it, your shared past. He figures it out in the exchange that is far more complex than one friends should share, but it all makes sense now.

Your friendship always slightly caught his attention, it bugged him in some way. Not because he felt bad for Aemond that you were so sweet on another man, but all your interactions were always weird he just didn’t figure out why until this very moment as Cregan fails to look over at him after what he read, as he watches this speechless interaction and sees the deep aching softness on the Lord's face and a deep set heartache in your eyes.

He had only seen such a speechless complexity in his mother and Ser Harwin. He was too young to realize it then but as he got older he understood what happened around him, and doesn’t fail to understand now.

Yet as much as he wants to give into this anger he feels boil within him at the thought of Lord Stark taking advantage of you in your five years in Winterfell, the news that awaits him helps him stay collected. Thus he steps forward without causing a scene and finally, Lord Stark drives all the attention to him, letting him finally receive the scroll, and leave you waiting longer without focusing on Cregan any longer. Now you turn to face your brother as he reads what was sent.

Once again it feels like what was written is getting read at an infuriatingly slow pace, but now you’re not impatient to know. You’re scared to know or read Jacaerys' face now. But you keep your eyes on your brother and watch his jaw unclench and his lips part to let out a soft gasp, while his once steady hands begin to tremble, and his eyes…water.

“Jacaerys,” you almost plead his name out.

That anger he had at the waiting completely disappears and he slowly looks up at you with a loud and heartbreaking sorrow.

“Jace,” you mewl.

Said man licks his lips and sniffles before he grabs your arm and gently pulls you aside.

“Listen to me,” his voice quivers and only makes your heart race faster than it’s already beating.

“Is it…” you trail off to catch your breath. “A-Aerion?”

Jacaerys shakes his head and keeps in those tears that fill his eyes. “No, Aerion is fine,” he assures you but you don’t feel relieved.

“What?” You beg for an answer and reach for his hands, but he lifts them and tucks loose strands of hair behind your ear.

“When,” he says shakily. “Lucerys was in StormsEnd, Aemond…”

You start to shake your head and his bottom lip trembles.

“Aemond killed Lucerys,” Jacaerys finally reveals quietly.

A cold breeze hits you and all that you had been feeling gets lost in the wind, leaving you numb.

Jacaerys calls your name but you stare ahead blankly. Theres nothing that crosses your mind, there’s nothing you feel that makes you react. You know it’s heavy and painful news, you knew they were dark words when Cregan told you speechlessly, but you can’t accept the truth that’s given. You don’t want to, you can’t because if you do then it means you will accept that your husband, the man you love…did what was written, and you don’t want to accept that.

However, Jacaerys calls out for you again and this time he grabs your arms and steals your attention, forcing you to once again connect to what you refused to feel.

“No,” you blurt and push him back. “You’re lying. You’re a liar.”

Jacaerys shows you the scroll as he gets close again. “You can read it yourself. It’s the truth, Lucerys…he’s,” he strains to say. “He’s…dead.”

Your heart drops and a flood of emotions rams through you, knocking the air out of your lungs, and making your legs weak.

Jacaerys grabs your arms and holds you up before you can fall and pulls you to him, letting you see how red his eyes are, and how drowned they are with tears he’s holding back.

“Jace,” you mewl and cover your mouth to sob.

Your brother nods in understanding without you having to express the rest of your sorrow. “I know,” he whispers. “I know.”

“Oh gods,” you gasp and drop your head while grabbing at your chest as you can’t seem to catch a breath. You can’t breathe. There’s so much air where you are, it’s so crisp but you can’t manage to take in any which in return only lets you feel the pounding of your heart, the rushing of your blood, and a rush of memories of your little brother Lucerys.

All you can think about is Lucerys, you imagine his last moments, and with every memory and every fake scenario the more you fail to grasp for air.

In the distance, Cregan watches how you’re breaking down, but no matter how much he wants to, he has to stay put even if it hurts not being able to help you when you need him the most. He does get close to trying something small since you are in so much pain trying to breathe, and your brother seems a bit lost on how to help you, but Jacaesys then does the first thing he thinks of and pulls you into an embrace.

Thankfully right away, at the feeling of your brother's weight, and at the feeling of his warmth, all those rushing memories slowly disappear, letting you draw in a deep breath. You pull him closer and bury your head in the crook of his neck whilst you wrap your hand around the back of his neck, and push his head down to let him bury his face on your shoulder so he can express everything he refuses to show to the public.

When he clutches onto the back of your cloak your heart comes to a slow pace, but it doesn’t stop weeping. With every ba-dum, you feel an aching pain in your chest that doesn’t go away.

Eventually, after a short time, Jacaerys pulls back and gives his back to Cregan to wipe away his tears before facing him with a sorrow that isn’t able to wipe off. “We need to go, my Lord. You’ll have to forgive us for not accompanying you back to Winterfell, but with our dragons here we need to make haste to return to Dragonstone.”

You grab at your chest and gently caress it as if that would cure you’re heartache while Jacaerys shares something you agree to without the need for a discussion.

Albeit Cregan is the one who protests. “It will get dark soon, why do you not wait until first light to take flight? Wait until you both have collected yourselves so you don't do anything rash in the heat of the moment.”

You shake your head and interject in a broken voice. “The storm won’t pass, Lord Stark. We’ll just face it head-on and leave, our mother needs us.”

Cregan steps forward, gaining a brief glance from you. “Just eat, and rest…I know the pain of losing a brother, I understand your grief, my heart is with you,” he tries to relate so you would listen. “I have lost many others too, I know the anger, please just let yourselves calm down before you return home. I will stay with you here.”

You know your brother too, you know how angry he can get. You know that once your grief really settles you’ll also start thinking of what happened and you’ll get upset too. Thus you don’t hurry to answer, you look at your brother and he looks at you. And without a word, you come to the same conclusion.

“All right,” Jacaerys says for the both of you. “We will stay, but leave at first light. Thank you, my Lord.”

——

*LATER*

Nothing makes sense.

Why? How?

Those questions are what runs around and around in your head accompanied by different terrifying scenarios that could’ve led to the act. A lot of it points to an accident, you want to believe in your heart of hearts that what…Aemond did was an accident. You don’t want to believe that this remorse got the best of him, he’s supposed to be better, he’s supposed to keep it in for your sake.

He knows how much you love your brothers, he knows he can hate them all he wants, but he can’t hurt them. And yes! You know that war was going to happen no matter what, and violence was going to be dragged in between your families, but Aemond went out of his way to…kill Lucerys when all he was was an envoy.

He killed your brother. Your husband killed your brother, and in turn, betrayed you in the worst way possible. He tore your heart out, and what hurts more is that he hasn’t said what he did in the multiple ravens he’s sent! Just like always, he never tells you a thing!

What are you supposed to believe, but the worst? You want to believe he’s good behind all that hard demeanor, you defend him against your family when they say something bad because you want to believe he has a good heart, but what does killing Lucerys prove? That you’ve been wrong all along?

Gods!

Damn it! Why did he have to do it? Why did he take Lucerys?

A knock raps on your door, but you’re so drowned in your heartache that you don’t hear the sound. It’s not until you hear your name being called out softly behind that door that you almost wake up from your stupor.

“It is I, Cregan,” he announces without the need to, you knew who he was the moment he uttered the first word. “Can I talk to you? You didn’t come for supper.”

You blink repeatedly to relieve the dry spell in your eyes after not blinking for a few seconds and clutch onto the ring you were fiddling with before you get up and unlock the door. You don’t proceed to say anything, you walk away from the door and stand against the fireplace, but Cregan takes the unlocked door as an invitation and walks in, finding your food untouched, you in your nightgown, and your head down.

“I came to check on you,” he says softly as if careful not to hurt you even more with his voice. When he gets no response or even a small breath, he walks in further and notices now how unkempt you are; you’re usually so precise with the way you keep yourself, you always look so clean and tidy, it was only in the morning when you first woke up that he would catch you off guard, but now it’s like you don’t care how you look.

“I hope you are not going to bed with your hair down like that,” he tries to be lighthearted. “You hate having your hair tangled in the morning.”

He waits for a reaction, a soft ‘oh’, but you stay quiet and it just deepens his concern.

“Darling,” he uses your pet name and you finally break from your stupor and turn partially to face him.

He expected a sweet look just out of instinct, but those usually wonder-filled eyes are clouded by agony and tears that can’t even fall down your cheeks anymore; while the fires fierce light brings clarity to your deep set frown, knitted brows, and puffy face worn out from crying.

“Here,” he breathes out and catches a gleam coming from in between your fingers. When he fills his curiosity he notices that the firelight is dancing on a sapphire ring you cannot stop fiddling with in between your fingers; a ring he had not seen you take off once since he saw you. Which must mean your husband gave it to you.

He doesn’t want to ask for many reasons, so he approaches you from behind and gently starts braiding your hair in silence you cannot seem to fill. It’s almost like there was no one inside your body, you were a hollow body left soulless.

“I understand why you locked your door,” he mentions in hopes that would get him a simple reaction. “However, it does not seem necessary, your dragons are restless and it stirs up fear in the brothers. And I am here as well.”

Your back raises as you draw in a deep breath, but rather than filling the silence with a dry response, or some remark, you just breathe out, making him steal a glance at the side of your face that he can see from behind you, before he pulls out the leather strip that keeps half of his hair out of his face to keep your own braid in place instead. He then proceeds to shuffle to your side to grab your arm.

“Sit down, Princess.” He commands softly.

You don’t fight him, you let him guide you down to your seat, and once he’s feeding the fire more wood your hoarse voice finally fills the room.

“I should have gone back to King's Landing…A—He sent me a raven the day after when my grandsire the King died. He didn’t tell me of course, but he told me to go back…I should have listened, I…” you pause to catch your breath. “Maybe then Lucerys…” you trail off and whimper whilst you drop your head in your hands.

Cregan leaves the last piece of wood in the fire and then wipes his hands on his shirt while he stands up to close the gap between you.

“Don't,” he says firmly and crouches down in front of you to grab your hands and pull them down so you can meet his gaze. “Do not blame yourself for your brother's death. What happened is not your fault to carry. What happened is dealt with, don’t dwell on things that can no longer happen.”

You hold his gaze while you process his words for a second and then look down at the ring you still hold.

“I’m sorry,” he says sorrowful words that bring your heart some comfort, but also make your body tremble while those tears that you once couldn’t muster, come rushing down your already stained cheeks.

Nothing else is spoken, and nothing is asked of either of you, but out of instinct your arms slip around his neck, and he returns the embrace and follows you to your feet where he keeps holding you and lets you cry on his shoulder; for hours? For a few seconds? You don’t know, you dwell in his comfort that you missed and relish in it until you stop crying.

He probably should have been the one to pull away, but he doesn’t complain, not once. He lets you pull back on your own time, and even then he grabs your arms to keep you close so he can cup your cheeks and caress them for a final piece of comfort to your aching heart.

Yet that proves to be a mistake because as you linger in his proximity, your eyes fall on his lips and you’re overwhelmed with a passion-filled heat that pushes your lips against his.

At first, Cregan is so stunned by the warmth of your lips on his, and then he’s taken by the excitement of feeling your lips reconnecting that he closes his eyes and kisses you back, but when his lust begins to rush through his blood he pulls back and groans.

“No,” he shakes his head and slides his hands down your face to grab your shoulders, leaving a burning trail down your skin. “You are married. No matter what happened you are still married, and you’re grieving.”

You want to forget your pain for a moment and be consumed by the comfort, bliss, and excitement he provides, but he’s also right. And how can you do that to Aemond…

But…

Maybe you don’t care if it hurts him because he hurt you. He won’t know either way—But you will know, you will know that it’s something that can hurt him, and you…don’t care. But Cregan…is right.

“I’m sorry,” you throw out and step away from him, feeling a chill hit those parts of you that he kept warm with his touch—“you are right. I’m sorry.”

Cregan turns away and swallows back thickly, feeling somewhat disappointed that he has to turn down this heat of the moment. “Perhaps I shall bid you a goodnight now.”

You swallow back to hide your disappointed sigh and nod. “Yes, goodnight Cregan.”

Said man avoids looking at you when he turns. It makes it easier to walk away from you. But when his hand touches the door handle he doesn’t turn it to open it, he stands there frozen with his back turned to you as he feels his honor start to slip.

He turns his head but doesn’t peek over right away, he fights himself but quickly falters when he feels the ghost of your wet lips haunting his. And when he fully looks back and sees the shadow of your sculpted figure in your white nightgown his inner battle is lost. He only proves his loss by locking the door and turning completely to face you, turning around as well.

“Cregan?” You query, puzzled by his presence.

Said man draws out a deep breath before he strides back to you with determination in his step and surprises you by grabbing your face the moment he can. You want to utter his name, but a small gasp is all that goes past your lips whilst you drop the ring that Aemond had gifted you.

“I pride myself in my honor,” he says while his eyes flicker between your parted lips and your shocked gaze. “But when it comes to you it’s turned to ash, nothing stops me from wanting you, from…” he trails off and leans forward, but you don’t allow your lips to touch. You shift your head away, but he follows you to keep your breaths unfurling over each other's lips.

“…desiring you in every way a gentleman shouldn’t. I burn for you when you’re far, and even when I dream of you. It is wrong.” He nods, and you nod too without much effort. “But you are my weakness, you have always been my weakness. You’re my joy, the reason I laugh, and also the reason I don’t march to King's Landing and bring you to Winterfell to make you mine,” he whispers against your lips, making a smile make an appearance on your saddened face.

“Tell me this is wrong, tell me to leave now,” he tells you and drags his eyes up to meet yours so you can know he’s being serious. “And I will. I will leave your chambers and when morning comes I’ll bid you farewell with no remorse and as nothing more than friends.”

As if being hypnotized to his lips you lean forward, but only let your lips brush, leaving your heart pounding as it screams for you to connect.

“I still have to leave,” you make it known while you gently cup his jaw to touch some part of him. “I have to return to Dragonstone no matter what.”

Cregan’s eyebrows pinch together and he hesitates before he nods. “I understand,” he mutters and glances at your lips again. “But that doesn’t change a thing if you tell me to leave.”

You should. You're still married even if Aemond betrayed you by killing your brother. And deep deep down a lot of your conflict comes because you don’t know if you did stop loving the man who killed your brother, but that reason is also why you want to give in to your deepest burning desire.

That reason is why you’re selfish and don’t resist Cregan or stop your heart from swooning at his confession.

“Don’t leave,” is all he needs to hear to smile widely before he finally feeds your desire by kissing you slowly, fueling that passionate heat that completely takes over your body, and leaving you still and breathless for a moment as you relish in the sweet taste of his soft lips melting with yours, guiding your every movement, and driving you mad with lust.

You had forgotten this dream-like feeling, you had forgotten how fast he makes your heart race when he’s kissing you, and you forgot how hot you burn when his fingers explore the perimeters of your body. Furthermore, you forgot how eager he can get until you feel his grip on the back of your gown.

You pull away quickly and protest. “No, no, wait, do not rip it.”

Cregan fingers loosen and you start to giggle. “Why do you always want to rip my gowns?” You bring up, making his lips lift to a smirk.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers between heavy breaths.

You press a kiss on his lips and then tell him, “gently.”

He breathes out deeply and nods once before he slides his fingers back to the ribbon tying your gown together, and slowly begins to untie it while you drift your lips to kiss the corner of his mouth, and then kiss his jaw before you graze your lips up and kiss the corner of his jaw.

Cregan lets out a groan from the back of his throat, making you feel chills grow on your skin.

“I hate all these layers,” he musters while you continue to leave a trail of kisses down to his neck. “They are so infuriating.”

You smile against his neck, causing you to feel his nails dig in your skin.

“It keeps me warm,” you tell him and lick a stripe up to his lips. “Your North is cold, my Lord.”

Cregan clenches his jaw and shakes his head. “A little less with your presence,” he completely wins you over, making you grin and look at him in awe.

“I missed you,” he finally lets himself confess to you. “My darling love.”

You sigh and whisper back. “I missed you too.”

His eyes gleam brighter and that short absence is filled once again with your lips while he finally slips off your gown, leaving you under a simple sheer gown that he slips off with ease.

“You’re beautiful,” he says with awe, and his eyes dark with lust.

“It’s no fair,” you argue between kisses and slowly drag your hands down to help him pull off his layers. “And you say I wear a lot of layers,” you comment, making him scoff.

You finally end up pulling the last one off and throw it to the side mindlessly as you’re captivated by his toned torso and those thick arms that he unfairly hides under all those garments.

“Kiss me,” you command in a voice oozing with honey.

“Gladly,” is all he says before capturing your face to smash his lips on yours and this time make out more roughly as he’s filled with a much more hungry need.

Your own need lets you multitask by unbuckling his pants and tugging on them so he can pull them off in the brief pause you have between devouring each other. Yet when his member is out for you to see, you take a moment to admire how girthy and hard it is, and how perfect every vein is on his length.

You can’t help but start to go on your knees, but he grabs your bicep and pulls you back up to drift you away from that need.

“No,” he says out of breath and instead wraps his arms around you, and presses his lips on your neck to start leaving wet kisses on your flesh while he also slides his hands down your body, making you shiver at the feeling of his warm hands caressing you gently.

Without lifting his mouth off your neck he drifts his hand behind your knee, and with no explanation, he pulls your leg up to help you climb up and wrap your legs around his waist so he can walk you back to the edge of the bed, and gently put you down.

Once you’re lying on your back he pulls back but leans down to press his hands beside your head, and simply hold your gaze with this endearing look that makes his eyes smile.

“I'm going inside you,” he warns you, making you shiver and swallow thickly as you already imagine the stretch. “You need to be quiet.”

You part your lips but utter nothing, instead, you lift your head and he responds by giving you what you wanted, a deep kiss, while he grabs his length and aligns himself with your hole. When his tip touches you you gasp and he grins before taking your lips again to distract you while he slowly penetrates you.

Albeit the stretch is so wonderful and filling that you claw your nails on his back and scratch his back as he keeps going in deeper. Once all the way inside he finally pulls his face back to whisper. “You were made for me. You belong with me.”

You don’t respond with words, you cup his cheeks and brush strands of his hair behind his ears before you slide your hand to the back of his neck to gently pull him down. “Cregan make me yours,” you finally fill the silence, feeling as if his cock hardens even more before he finally starts moving his hips, filling you with a blinding ecstasy that heightens this passionate moment, and makes you only think about him and the pleasure he feels and gives you. You forget your sorrows and the grudge. You forget the war and the responsibilities you have.

You’re selfish in the lust-filled night and remain ignorant even before it's time to get out of bed. You just relish in Cregan's presence for a bit longer.

“Cregan…” you whisper, and the man hums in response letting you sigh before you share what’s been bothering you. “I do not like that I am the reason you disregard your honor. I do not like putting you through that.”

The hand on your back stops moving and a small huff rolls out of his nose. “I think it’s late to start thinking about that.”

You blink repeatedly with discontent and abruptly sit up to face him. “I am not jesting,” you press sharply. “I’m being serious. You hold your honor in high regard, I hate to be the one who makes it falter.”

A faint smile tugs on his lips without regard to your comment before he leans forward and assures you. “I have my honor, I never forget it, but I love you more. I’m being selfish without disregarding everything to be it. I know how to hold myself back,” he says firmly and cups your cheek to bring you closer to him. “I know where I stand, I am just choosing to have a taste of happiness. You, my darling, are my happiness.”

Your eyes water and your heart swoons, there’s nothing you can say that would measure up to the kind things he just said, all you can do is press a lingering kiss on his warm lips before you lay your head down on his chest, and hold onto him like he’s your security blanket.

“I…could offer you and your Aerion refuge here,” he offers and makes your pounding heart hurt.”

“Here? In Castle Black?” You tease without sounding too amused.

Cregan scoffs and starts to caress your arm. “Not here. In Winterfell,” he clarifies without a hint of falter at the mention of your son who is fathered by someone else who does bring him pangs of jealousy every time he remembers you’re married, and when he hears his name. “I would make sure no one could touch you and your boy there. He wouldn’t have to grow up around so much violence and you would not have to worry.”

You tilt your head down to kiss his shoulder before you give his offer an answer. “It's a nice offer, but my place is not hiding in a cage like some frightened bird. My place is out there, with my mother, with my brother, and the rest of my family fighting with the dragon I have. My mother needs me and I don’t want to leave her alone.”

Cregan doesn’t interject with anything, his chest rises and slowly falls back down, letting you know your response slightly wounded him.

“Instead of having her husband with her when she lost my sister,” you begin to say quieter but filled with frustration. “Daemon was out leading her council. I was the one who held her when she cradled my sister's lifeless body. I…have to be there for her now.”

“I understand,” he doesn’t falter to assure you. “But you must know if you ever find yourself needing somewhere to go, Winterfell is yours. You and your son are welcome.”

You lift your head off him to face him in the little space left between you. “I will always remember that. Thank you,” you say from the bottom of your heart.

A smile twitches on his serious face, and he proceeds to press a feathered kiss on your lips before he grins and says. “Sing for me? Just for me.”

You giggle and gently smack his shoulder. “No,” you answer bluntly and lay back down basically on him.

“Why not?” He chuckles. “It's not like you have to fear enchanting me with your song, you already have.”

You roll your eyes. “Shut up. Anyway!” You change the subject. “I was supposed to stop writing to you. I had already planned it.”

Cregan sighs and his chin rests on the top of your head. “I know,” he mutters. “You stopped writing as much as you would recently.”

Your smile falls but you grow desperate and hopeful. “But…you will answer me when I write to you in the weeks to come, right?”

He shrugs and interjects. “If that’s what you want, I will.”

You nod softly. “I do.”

You lift yourself up again to face him so he knows you’re being sincere. “I do.”

He grabs your cheek and his eyes soften. “Are you frightened?” He makes sure to ask.

You swallow thickly and shake your head. “No. Nervous, but not scared.”

He smirks and slides his hand down to caress your chin. “That’s my girl. You know how to fight, use that.” He tells you.

You laugh nervously. “I’ve never had to actually use my skill for violence.”

Your swordsmanship and your skills with archery were never for the intent of being some warrior, you like the idea of being like Queen Visenya Targaryen, and Princess Alyssa, but mostly your need to be trained with a sword and with archery was because you took it as a challenge. They said you couldn’t have it and you challenged them. Thus now that you’re having to face this war and the potential of having to use your skill, you’re honestly quite nervous.

You’ve never admitted that. You don’t want to admit it to anyone but him so they don't feel like you aren’t reliable.

“It won’t be easy,” Cregan says the truth. “But when you face your enemy, do not hesitate. Think quickly but be smart and do not let them gain the upper hand. You have a dragon, use her, and you have skill, good skill. Use it.”

You let out a shaky breath and nod in comprehension. He offers you a gentle smile and pulls you down to press his forehead against yours.

“You must know I will wait for you. Just a while longer.”

Asking what will happen after a while passes scares you, so you leave it be and just give him an honest response. “If fate ends up letting me choose, I will finally come home to you.”

He flashes you a charming smile that eases that worry in your heart and only works to sink you further down into this little escape.

“Now,” he coos against your lips. “Will you sing for me?”

You roll your eyes with a flattered smile featured on your face before you pull away to lay back on his chest and finally do as he asks of you as a parting gift where there aren't multiple people watching you, and pushing you down to hide or pretend that you’re nothing more than friends. You sing him a song for only him to hear before you take your leave and face reality once again.

——

*SOMETIME LATER. DRAGONSTONE*

What good is actually facing reality? Facing a dead beloved brother, and the fact that it was someone who you loved that killed him?

Dragonstone is a painful reminder of what happened while you were away. Only now that pain in your heart is tenfold and you don’t think anyone can actually know the pain that plagues you. Who can truly understand what it is you carry? No one is married to the man who killed Lucerys. They can hate him with ease, but you?

You want to despise him, you fought yourself the entire flight back to Dragonstone to hate him and view him as another enemy, to view him like you view Aegon, but as much as you think you hate him, your heart fights hard to try and tell a different tale. And that’s what makes it worse.

Thus it's easier, it was almost healing, having an escape with Cregan, but now there’s no one who will silence your cries. And what makes matters worse is facing your heartbroken mother. You don’t like seeing her cry or be hurt, when she lost Visenya your pain could never equate to what she was feeling, but you hurt too with every groan, with all the blood that she spilled, and every sob. Now you’re moments away from her and your heart and soul are already shattering.

However, after you watch your dragon disappear into the caves with Vermax, and take a step inside the castle, a hand wraps around your forearm and you’re pulled into a dark dead end where there aren't prying eyes or nearby ears.

“<Tell me the truth,” Jacaerys spats in a whisper so no one would hear the sound of his words also protected by High Valyrian. “About you and Lord Stark.>”

You can’t help yourself, you blink repeatedly in disbelief and gape like a fish out of water.

“< There's no point in lying,” he only further surprises you. “I figured it out when he got the letter from Dragonstone. I would see it every time you would talk but I never pieced it together until yesterday. It all made sense then, the glances, what you would tell each other, and every story you told about him.>”

Tears fill your eyes and your heart echos in your ears as you’re struck with shame. Not for loving another man, but that Jacaerys found out.

“<He touched you?>” He proceeds to ask in your shocked silence.

And it’s in that silence where he figures out your unspoken response and finally lets go of your arm to turn away with a scoff.

“<He never forced himself on me,” you defend Cregan. “Everything we did was because we wanted it to happen. We love each other.>”

Jacaerys turns on his heels with frustration and clutches onto your arms to sneer. “<You saw how much mother suffered because she was with Ser Harwin. Did you not learn anything?>”

You know he’s remarking all that stuff to your face because he cares. He’s being thoughtful in his way but it doesn’t stop you from crying, and when you shed tears you hit a cord in your brother's heart and he lets go of you with a sigh.

“<If you weren’t already married I would turn back and force him, but alas,>,” he mutters and sighs again before turning and dropping his head in his hands.

“<He would’ve too,” you defend his honor. “But I did not want Aemond to hurt him with Vhagar. I choose not to marry him, please don’t blame him. He’s a good man.>”

Jacaerys shakes his head in disappointment and turns to face you with his eyes narrowed into a fierce glare and his lips curled in a snarl. “How am I not supposed to blame him?” He remarks in the common tongue. “He had his way with you and did not do what he was supposed to do! What an honorable man would do!”

“I told you already, I told him not to because of Aemond.”

Jacaerys grabs his face and rubs the bridge of his nose, so you continue to try and calm him down.

“He was always respectful and kind. And…” you pause and lick your lips before you utter the reality. “There’s nothing you can do about it now. There's no use in being upset, I am married and that won’t change even if I love him unless Aemond dies. So please,” you plead softer and step towards him to grab his arm so he can face you. “Please Jace, keep it a secret. No one must know. It’s in the past. Please don’t tell a soul.”

Jacaerys eyes snap to you and he clenches his jaw as he looks at you thoughtfully for a few agonizing moments before he sighs and whispers. “Fine. I will not tell anyone only because there’s nothing I can do now.”

You sigh with relief and wipe away your tears before you offer him a thankful smile and a sweeter comment. “Thank you so much. Thank you, Jace, really. I love you.”

Jacaerys lets out a deep breath and his face slowly lets that frustration go, and instead slowly falls to express a soft sorrow. You slide your hand down his arm to cup his hand and slowly mirror that grief as you remember what you lost and that pain you both now harbor.

No matter how hard you wish, there’s nothing in this world that can change what happened, no one can bring back your fallen brother. And what’s even crueler is that no matter how hopeful you were for the news to be a lie, you’re home now and that hope lies with Lucerys.

You both come to the same realization and speechlessly exchange it, bringing you both into each other's embrace to cry now without care.

And deep down you both want to stay close in just the way you are so neither of you run the risk of losing each other the way you lost Lucerys. It’s a foolish thought, but it’s one brought by grief, and a new fear set in both of your hearts because no matter how much you love your little brothers, nothing can compare to the bond the three of you had. A bond that now consists of Jacaerys and you. Just him and you.

“Jacaerys,” your moment is interrupted by a feminine voice that also speaks your name but does not belong to your mother. And when you both break away and look over you see Baela stand at the end of the hall with her hands clasped together and a pitiful look in her eyes.

“Baela,” you greet and wipe your tears away while Jacaerys turns to wipe his own tears away.

“Welcome back home,” she speaks sweetly.

You offer her a thankful nod before you walk over to her and meet her halfway with an embrace.

“I’m sorry,” she says quietly.

You nod and then interject. “Thank you.” You pull back and glance around in search of her twin. “Where’s Rhaena?”

Baela sighs. “In her chambers.”

You wished to greet her just as you returned home, but now you’ll have to speak to her after you speak with your mother.

“And what about…” you trail off and hesitate. “What about my mother?”

Baela glances behind you as Jacaerys approaches you and then gives you the answer you wanted. “I’ll take you to her.”

You offer her a thankful smile and watch her walk to Jacaerys to wrap her arms around him and offer him sweeter condolences. When the moment passes she guides you to your mother and your heart begins to pound, while your stomach twists and makes you feel almost nauseous at the anticipation. You already know you’re going to break even more, but there’s something about thinking about your mother being heartbroken that already tears you apart.

And maybe a part of it is because…it feels like you had a hand in her heartbreak because it was your husband who killed Lucerys.

It was not really you, you know that. You were oblivious to your husband's affairs, but no matter what anyone says, yes, that’s what is dwelling within, your guilt. It rattles you to the point you can’t be comfortable in your own skin.

As you get closer to your mother's quarters breathing gets hard once again, and your surroundings begin to dim, leaving only the narrow path ahead visible. You want to run away and not face the pain you’ll see. But when the doors to your mother's quarters open and you see her sitting across the fireplace, alone and in the dark, that panic settles as if she was the fresh air you needed to calm down, leaving you with the need to be embraced by her warmth and comfort, while also giving the same in return.

“Your Grace,” you greet her softly once Baela clears the room and leaves only you and your brother with your mother.

Your pounding heart starts racing once again, but it’s not out of fear, it’s racing out of a need to ease your pain, and the pain you clearly see on her delicate face. Yet you hold strong with tears stinging in your eyes already.

“Lady Jayne Arryn has pledged her support,” Jacaerys breaks the emotional silence to share the support you both gained when you were away on a mission. “…In exchange for a dragon to guard the Vale,” you hear the tear in your brother's voice, and when you glance over at him you see him fiddling with his hands while his eyes grow more and more teary, making your already weak hold, falter.

You still want to continue for him, but when you part your lips you can’t utter a word, it’s all lost in your grief that heightens the longer you watch your mother.

“And,” Jacaerys continues sounding even more brokenhearted by the second. “Lord Cregan Stark,” he pauses and takes a deep breath, but doesn’t seem to find the will to finish. He falls breathless and that wall he usually has up to be perceived as strong, and a protector crumbles, leaving him shaky.

You reach over to grab his hand while tears start to roll out of your eyes as you trail on for him. “…Lord Stark…promised 2000 men,” you manage to share with all the might you can muster.

Your mother doesn’t respond, she instead stands from her seat with her face contorting with grief and approaches the both of you, making you completely lose the faltering hold you had on your emotions.

However, when she’s close, Jacaerys reaches out first and she welcomes him in her arms. You want to do the same, you’ve been aching for it, but your guilt hits you and you stand there frozen with your head down.

“Mother,” you mewl with streams of tears. “I’m…sorry.”

Your mother pulls away from Jacaerys just slightly, leaving her arm around his neck to approach you and caress your cheek with no disdain in her eyes; nor does she look at you like you were the one at fault, her eyes are sad, but she expresses her reassurance before she slides her arm around your neck and pulls you in her gentle embrace and confirms that she doesn’t hate or blame you.

It’s such a relieving comfort that it works to lift some weight off your chest. Weight Cregan couldn’t ease when he talked to you.

Now you can ease in your mother's embrace without feeling like she hates you. Now you can caress her back without the fear of getting rejected.

Soon thereafter, neither Jacaerys nor you attempt to leave your mother's comfort. Nor does it feel like your mother wants either of you to pull away from her embrace that protects her two eldest from the cruel reality that took her third child.

You stay interlinked and weep on each other's shoulders until she pulls away to face you both.

“I have been waiting for your return to light…Lucerys pyre,” she shares. “Is it fine if we light it tonight? The sun is setting and the winds are calm.”

You and Jacaerys don’t find a reason to push the funeral back. You also know there are other matters to attend to that don't give you the luxury of sitting in your grief.

But, oh wouldn’t that be nice?

You don’t want to ignore what happened, no, that’s not what you want. You just want to take a moment to process what happened, and who did it, and tell yourself that you will no longer see your little brother Lucerys.

But no, war forces you to face reality and deal with your grief harshly on the same night you arrived from Winterfell, and at the same spot where your baby sister's funeral pyre was lit.

This time the crowd is smaller though, more intimate. Daemon isn’t even here, which isn’t surprising, but it is also disappointing that he can’t be at his wife’s side as she deals with the death of her son, and lights yet another funeral pyre. And what grows your hatred for him even more is that he can’t seem to be bothered to be a father to his daughter who just lost her betrothed. It’s a good thing Baela is at her side.

It’s also good that you can be with your family this time, dealing with your father's grief alone was devastating. There was no one besides your handmaiden Vanessa to hold your hand and embrace you when you wept. Comforting letters could never measure up to the comfort of your mother's arms or that of your siblings and your grandparents.

Now though, you stand amongst them around the fire that will burn away the only pieces you have of Lucerys, which are his things. There's not even bones to turn to ash, nothing was found of him but his cloak, and a part of his dragon's wing.

Thus Jacaerys steps up first and throws in a soft red blanket along with a piece of his clothes. Besides a few tears rolling down his face, he holds strong now, unlike before when he was in the privacy of just you and your mother, which is assuring. He definitely seems to comfort Joffrey, who throws a wooden horse in the fire, leaving you to step up next.

Yet when you step up and lift a small wooden ship you sob for the brother you’ll never be able to see grow into a man. You’ll never be able to see him marry, or see him command his fleets. You’ll never be able to watch him build a family of his own, nor will you be able to dance another song with him, he’ll be gone forever.

You throw away all those possibilities you’ll never get to see in the fire, and watch the flames eat away at the small wooden ship, and turn to ash everything you couldn’t watch your brother do.

Thick smoke rises, it infiltrates through your nose and stings your throat and eyes while also helping you realize something through the stinging pain, that being your hate for Aemond, your husband, and best friend. You were clouded with confusion before, you couldn’t let go, but you see it clearly now in the thick smoke, you hate him.

And it’s because of your realization that you don’t realize your mother is next to you until you catch her throwing in a piece of Lucery’s clothes with agony contorting her face and clouding her eyes. She lingers by the fire for a moment and you watch her shoulders shake before she steps back. You fall by her side and glance down at her empty hand before you reach over to grab it and once again be the comfort she needs in her moment of pain.

A need to go to Rhaena’s side does grow. You feel called to her side to comfort her, but once the fire starts to lose its power, and all the wooden logs turn black, you step away from your brother and mother's side, but come to a stop right away as you feel guilt again. Your mother might’ve speechlessly assured you, but Rhaena’s anger and grief is different, what if she does blame you for what Aemond did?

If you weren’t away you probably could’ve stopped Aemond, but you weren’t with him. What if she blames you for Aemond taking her betrothed?

You don’t want to be the source of more pain for your cousin, so out of fear and guilt, you don’t approach her. You avoid her and instead, let your grandfather give his condolences before embracing your grandmother.

“I heard the Queen made you her hand,” you interject and pull back to face her with a proud smile. “Congratulations, grandmother, I could think of no one more capable than you.”

Your grandmother caresses your face and offers you a sweet and thankful smile. “Thank you, my Sweet. How are you doing?” She asks with a concerned gaze.

You sigh. “I’m dealing with all my emotions, but I’m relieved that I at least don’t have to go through my grief alone this time,” you share, earning a faint smile.

“I was wondering…” you roll out hesitantly whilst you hook your arm around his to head back inside together. “…does anyone accompany you on your patrols?”

Without needing to hear the rest of what you wanted to ask, she figures out the direction you're taking this conversation.

“No,” your grandmother assures you.

“Oh, well I was wondering,” you finally get to your question. “If I could accompany you? The sea is large, together we could cover more ground. Besides,” you sweet talk her to persuade her. “Astraea is fast, and she’s grown large from her time at Winterfell. She’s good at sea. She likes to dive with me on her. And I am a good archer on Dragonback. We could help you.”

Your grandmother scoffs and flashes you a smile. “Well as much as I would like your help, we would have to ask the Queen first. Bring it up with her and if she accepts I would love to share patrol with you, it would relieve me of some work.”

You smile excitedly and nod eagerly. “Good, I’m glad. I’ll ask her at the next council meeting.”

Your grandmother offers you an encouraging smile and helps you feel some joy in the dark storm that casts over you.

Of course, no one or nothing brings you more joy than your little one, your beloved Aerion. When you see him fast asleep in his cradle your dim world lights up and you muster a happy grin.

As much as you want him to wake so he knows you’ve returned to him, you let him be and just crouch by the cradle to admire him as he sleeps.

You admire his cute round cheeks, his tiny little hands balled up to fists over his head, his thin eyelashes he got from his father, and those pink thin lips he also got from

Aemond. But most importantly you watch his chest carefully to make sure he’s breathing.

You could watch him sleep for hours on end and never tire. Especially because sometimes, just like now, you catch him smiling in his sleep and you just can’t help but swoon.

You always wondered what it is they dream about, fairytales mayhaps? Food? Their parents?

Does he dream about his father now that they’re apart? A father who loves him, and takes pride in his son? A father that you hate and…cheated on…

He killed your little brother, and you lay with Cregan because you wanted to, because you missed him, and you were upset and selfish, but now that you’re looking at your son sleeping away a different pang of guilt punctures your heart.

A guilt you shouldn’t feel, Aerion is young, he won't remember this conflict, but he will feel shame if he ever finds out you cheated on his father.

Yes, his father hurt you first, Aemond betrayed you first. He hurt you in one the worst ways possible! But…now…

Now you’re looking at Aerion and you think of how this could also hurt him. He’s young, a baby turning five months old soon, he won’t remember his life as an infant, but your secret won’t be forgotten, especially if in the future Cregan and you aren’t together.

It would hurt him so much if he ever found out. That’s what makes you cry with guilt. Not regret, you don’t regret your night with Cregan, he made you happy, but you do feel guilt and shame.

——

*THE NEXT MORNING*

Does Aemond’s crime justify what you did?

You can’t help but think of that, you can’t help but think of the hate you harbor, but you also can’t stop thinking about him. About the way his family doesn’t show him the affection you do. He protects them and takes care of them, but they will never return it in the same amount.

He’s probably lonely, and brooding. He’s probably silently just lurking in his brother's council, and breaking his fasts alone.

You always tried breaking fast and eating dinners together. He always smiled when he saw the way you were dressed, especially when you wore purple. He always gave you a kiss before you drifted apart for the day, and when you saw each other he kissed you with need as if you had gone years without seeing each other.

When night came, or when you found yourselves just in a calm moment, he let his guard down and let himself be vulnerable. You loved those moments the most because it felt as if only he and you existed in this world.

Actually, he treated you like you were the only person he has ever loved. You came first all the time, even before your son. Which is selfish, but you never minded because who could treat you the same?

Cregan’s people come first, the North comes first no matter what he says. That’s why he’s not marching over here to fight himself because other priorities come first, but with Aemond, he may have his goals and his pride, but you were never held lesser than something. His anger got in the way. It’s blinding but you understand why.

You understood at least…because the truth is you can’t defend him now…

He deserves his solitude. You hate him for taking Lucerys away. That much is true and you put that over everything.

“Princess,” Vanessa’s sweet voice cuts through the blowing breeze of the sea, making you pick your eyes off your son to look into the distance.

“Vanessa,” you entertain your handmaiden with what you know she’s leading up to.

“I was wondering,” she parts her lips, but before she can finish her thought the sound of your name coming from someone else’s lips interrupts the conversation. You look back and smile faintly when you see your grandfather Corlys.

“Grandfather,” you greet sweetly as you stand up to watch him approach you at shore.

“I’m surprised to see you out here so early,” he mentions, making you scoff softly and look down at Aerion watching your grandfather carefully.

“When I saw Aerion he was sleeping, so I wanted to make up for it and spend as much time as I can before I’m called away,” you tell him and study him, noticing he’s standing up a lot straighter than before, and still using a very nice wooden cane. “I wanted to apologize for not going to visit you when you were abed. I’m more than glad to see you up now and attending to your fleet.” You smile brightly and watch him get close to watch Aerion in your arms.

“It's quite all right,” he assures you and meets your gaze. “You are a dragon rider, and the Queen's daughter, there’s a lot to do. I'm happy to see you safely returned, I know Aerion has missed you.”

You glance at your son, and as if he knew you were admiring him he glances at you and smiles before laying his head on your shoulder.

“Rhaenys and I would take him on strolls when the day gave us time,” your grandfather catches you by surprise. “The poor lad would be cooped all day with your mother gone.”

Considering Aerion the son of Aemond, you didn’t think your grandparents, especially your grandfather would much care for your son, but hearing his report really brings a warmth to your heart.

“I noticed that young Aerion quite enjoys being by the water,” your grandfather adds, making you grin and nod.

“Yes, he loves it when the waves roll over his feet,” you share giddily and caress your son's head as you return your gaze to your grandfather. “And he gets lulled to sleep by the sound of crashing waves.”

“He’ll be a fine sailor in no time.”

You hum happily at your grandfather's comment and then watch him glance out at the never-ending sea before he sighs softly, and then looks back at you with a faint smile that lets you catch a look in his eye that makes you think he’s up to something.

“Why don’t you and Aerion accompany me to Driftmark? It’s still early, and you can come back by dragonback before you’re needed,” he suggests.

You have been meaning to keep your mind off all the racing thoughts that kept you up at night, and well, you are extremely curious. It’s not common for him to invite you to accompany him anywhere. That’s what your grandmother does.

“Vanessa,” you address your handmaiden, and give your grandfather an answer. “Return inside, if anyone asks for me tell them where I am and that I will return soon.”

Your handmaiden offers you a comprehensive nod and goes off to do as you asked, letting you walk with your grandfather toward his boat under the morning sky pampered with fluffy white clouds that make you feel a smidge of joy as certain memories infiltrate your mind.

“On nice days like these my father would take me sailing,” you muse with your grandfather. “I’m pretty sure the septa giving me lessons would despise when he would pull me from my lessons since I was a princess and had no business doing boy stuff, but,” you grin softly. “He was the prince consort, he did as he pleased and my mother never minded. Besides, I encouraged him,” you pause and feel your eyes begin to sting without much warning.

“He taught me a lot of ships…I miss him,” you finish in a whisper.

Your grandfather lets out a deep sigh and you see him nod along with you from the corner of your eye.

“Did he teach you how to read maps?” Your grandfather wonders.

You nod. “Yes, and star charts. I could learn more about those, but I could follow the stars North and to King’s Landing with no map. He…never tried to leave anything out, he was always so excited.”

Your grandfather hums and you glance over at him to address something else on your chest. “I’m glad you decided to side your fleet and Driftmark with my mother.”

His dark eyes meet yours and he quirks a brow. “Why would I side with Aegon?”

Well besides him being a man, there’s also the fact that it’s highly theorized Daemon killed his son. You believe and hate him for it, but no matter how much you want to share that belief, you bite your tongue and shrug as if it was just a concerned-filled thought.

Your grandfather understands your speechless response and holds your gaze as he gives his vague response. “I had many reasons to side with your mother.”

You offer him a simple proud smile and reach his boat in a peaceful silence only filled by the crashing waves and the cawing of seabirds. You had hoped to feel a hint of those exciting and tender feelings you oftentimes felt with your father when you were out at sea, but even if you walk with his father, those feelings you ache to reconnect to aren’t anywhere close, reminding you that you’ll never be with your father ever again, or have a bond with any father-figure.

Albeit your grandfather does let you sail the boat to Driftmark, but as excited you do feel to show off your skills and once again maneuver a boat, you still feel empty within.

“My dragon loves the sea,” you begin to say with the intention of persuading him to use your aid at sea whilst you keep an eye on the distant waters. “And I have learned how to use a bow and arrow on dragonback, perhaps I could be the dragon rider to protect your fleet when battle hits our shores, or we attack theirs,” you finish and peer back at him with a sly grin, unknowingly reminding him of his son when he was your age and eager to prove his worth. You even wore the same sly smile Laenor wore when he was proving himself a fine sailor and dragonrider.

“That…” he starts off quietly but then clears his throat and sounds as mighty as ever. “That would honor me.”

You offer him a happy smile over your shoulder and then let your gaze fall on Aerion strapped on your chest, noticing him watching the waves with his eyes wide and full of wonder.

However, the wonder slowly gets lost as he starts to get lulled to sleep. He tries to fight the sleep to keep watching the moving waves, but he’s outmatched and loses himself to sleep not long before you arrive at Driftmark’s shore.

Unlike Dragonstone, Driftmark is more lively with people; both townspeople and soldiers from the fleets as well as those who work on your grandfather's massive ship. Some seem worried that something could happen at any given moment, while others seem to be happy just mindlessly living.

You begin to wonder about that happiness, you don’t envy their joy, a part of you resents all these people being so happy and living their lives unaffected by the death of Driftmark’s Heir. You wonder why it is they don’t feel what you’re plagued with, you want them to feel your sorrow.

But then you do realize that you’re just letting your pain cloud your judgment.

“Besides having you accompany me,” your grandfather interjects, pulling your attention away from the large ship. “I wanted to share something I have been thinking of as of late.”

You clasp your hands together and out of instinct reach out to fiddle with the ring Aemond gave you, but you’re then surprised when you feel that your ringer finger is bare.

You spare a glance at your finger and drift your gaze to the ground, but you’re then reminded of the fact that you left your ring behind in your borrowed quarters at Castle Black.

You probably won’t ever see it again…

“…I was hoping that when Aerion is older he could be my ward,” your grandfather catches your attention and makes you furrow your eyebrows and look at him with disbelief, and slightly bothered.

“Of course,” he continues, “he won’t have to join me until he’s much older, but he is Laenor’s grandson, I want him to know the sea, and I want to teach him about ships and how to command fleets like I taught your father.”

You glance at your sleeping son and cradle the back of his head as if protecting him from being parted from you.

“He’s the son of a second son, he won’t inherit a crown or a castle from his father, but he could inherit…my title.”

You snap your eyes over to him and come to a slow stop as you’re overcome with surprise. You want to be filled with pride and joy, but there’s an obstacle that stops you. “But,” you mutter your thought out loud. “He is Aemond’s son. A man who opposes us. A man who killed your heir.”

Your grandfather turns away from his ship and faces you, and doesn’t fail to nod in agreement. “Aye, he is the son of Prince Aemond, but Aerion has salt-littered blood. He is the grandson of Laenor Velaryon, my son.”

Aerion is also your son, and you are also your father's firstborn, and only biological child, but he doesn’t seem to ever mention that! What are you, a painted portrait?

You would’ve loved to inherit Driftmark and his title of Lord of the Tides, but no!

You would ask about Rhaena getting that chance before Aerion since she is the daughter of his only daughter, but you don’t see that having a good answer, so you don’t even waste your breath.

“What of Joffrey?” You bring up. “He should be your heir.”

Your grandfather sighs and nods stiffly but quickly counters you. “Perhaps, but I want it to be Aerion. The grandson of my son.”

It’s not hard to realize the actual truth behind his response; Joffrey is the bastard son of your father. With Lucerys gone, he can actually name an actual Velaryon his heir. It doesn’t seem fair, your father loved your brothers whether they were his or not, but who are you to deny Aerion of a fruitful future?

He comes first now, and it doesn’t seem like your grandfather is actually asking your permission or for your actual thoughts, his mind seems mind up, so with a deep breath and a hesitant smile you accept what he brings up. “That…would make me happy. And I’m sure it would’ve made my father happy.”

Your grandfather offers you a smile and surprises you by patting your shoulder as an endearing gesture that brings a…silence where you smile faintly out of pride, but you can’t help but think what next. You’ve never actually spent so much time with your grandfather, and if you do your grandmother has always been with you.

“Why don’t you show your knowledge on the ship,” your grandfather luckily drifts the attention over.

However, just as you approach the plank resting on the dock, he stops you by grabbing your shoulder and interjecting loudly. “Alyn!”

You follow his gaze and blink repeatedly in surprise when you see the same Addam of Hull who fought in your engagement tourney.

When the man’s eyes fall on you beside your grandfather his lips part in surprise, but when he reaches you he closes his mouth and bows his head. “Princess,” he greets you properly right away.

“Ser,” you greet him quite excitedly.

“Good,” your grandfather cuts in and steps back. “You remember each other.”

You drift your gaze to your grandfather and express your confusion with knitted eyebrows that he helps ease with a quick response. “I sent him to check on you for me when I was fighting in the Step Stones.”

Instead of going to you himself?

Whatever.

“Really?” You ask with more surprise. “Well thank you, he was a very excellent jouster who brought Driftmark and me great pride.”

Alyn offers you a stiff smile and bows his head as a thank you.

“Good, I’m glad to hear he can’t show his skill,” your grandfather fills the man’s silence. “Why don’t I let you get reacquainted.”

Without room to argue he walks away and leaves you alone with Ser Alyn—or is it just Alyn since it was your grandfather who sent him?

“Seeing you again makes this world feel small. I never thought our paths would cross again,” you fill the silence to avoid awkward silences.

“In truth neither did I,” he admits. “But it is an honor.”

You offer him a smile and notice how much more muscular he is now compared to before. He’s also a lot more serious too.

“Who—”

“Alyn!”

You both turn your attention to the caller, and you see a tall and thin man with long dreadlocks approaching with a bright and charming grin that immediately works to intrigue you.

Albeit when he notices your unique white hair, your long and elegant red gown finer than any material he’s touched; accompanied with shiny gold jewelry on your hands and neck, he realizes that you are no ordinary woman. The man’s grin slowly disappears at the realization and he slows down towards Alyn. Once he’s finally nearby he straightens up and doesn’t fail to bow when he joins you and Alyn.

“My Princess,” the mystery man greets you with a nervous but charming smile that actually serves to completely get rid of any tension or awkward atmosphere he could’ve brought.

“Princess,” Alyn interjects and looks at the man in blue beside him. “This is my brother Addam. Addam, this is the Princess, granddaughter of Lord Corlys Velaryon.”

You and Addam meet each other's gaze and that snobby princess Addam already imagined you’d be upon laying eyes on you completely falls apart when you offer him a bright smile in return. You perhaps are one of the most majestic beauties he’s ever laid his eyes on, he can’t help but think. Even from afar you were luminous and almost like an illusion, but from up close he could see your beauty was no illusion, he could see a sadness in your eyes, but so much more that intrigued him.

You give him your name and Addam’s eyes proceed to fall on the sleeping infant strapped on your chest. “Who is this?”

You cradle your baby's head and introduce him to Addam and Alyn. “This is my son, Aerion Targaryen.”

“Hm, not one to care about first impressions I see,” Addam throws out boldly, making his brother shoot him a warning glare. You, however, laugh genuinely in return, which is something that surprises even you. You didn’t think you could ever laugh the way you just did again.

“He takes after his father,” you mirror his humor.

“Well, we’ll let this lad get away with it this time.”

You scoff and nod. “I’ll make sure he’s more prepared next time,” you remark lightheartedly.

He hums and glances over at his brother. “Could I ask how you met?”

“At a tourney,” you answer for Alyn. “Last year. Apparently, he was sent by my grandfather.”

“Tourney?” Addam asks as if it’s the first time hearing of it. “Aren’t you supposed to be a knight?”

“Actually I was trying to get to that too,” you share and both wait for a response from the serious man.

“Well I was surprised to see what money could buy,” he remarks. “I was deceitful when I entered. I am no knight.”

You hum and ease his growing worry right away by assuring him. “Well, I would say you were actually quite entertaining and impressive. You fought well and won.”

Addam pats his brother's back and whispers, “I’m proud of you.”

You watch Addam offer his brother a very faint smile and you can’t help but remember the grief you had pushed aside as you remember the brother you lost.

“I was hoping to have some early brunch with my brother,” Addam now directs at you. “But it seems insignificant now that you have graced us with your presence.”

You can't help but smile with amusement and feel slightly flattered. Addam is surely more outgoing than his brother in a way that doesn’t fail to catch your interest and actually helps bring attention to his fierce spirit that you can’t help but feel the need to get to know.

Actually meeting him makes you feel like you found something you had been in search of your whole life.

.

.

.

.

.

A/N- romantic or platonic? (For those who have read moonlight before already know but please don’t spoil it for the rest heheh :)

Tagged- @namelesslosers @stargaryenx @chainsawsangel @lauftivy @winxschester @cloudroomblog @llarue @padsdarlg @sofietargaryen @gracielikegrapes @dreaming-of-the-reality @itzelpeyton @patdsinner33 @mrsdominickstark @elaena-aerrin @todoroki-slut @snh96 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @nifujiswhore @sweethoneyblossom1 @kaetastic @lightdragonrayne @squidscottjeans @oh-you-mean-me @wallacewillow0773638

[jasntodds]

Penance [6]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader

Words: 12,153

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, a little bit of angst, fluff, mentions of death, canon violence

Summary: ❝Thesus: Stop. Give me your hand. I am your friend. Herakles: I fear to stain your clothes with blood. Thesus: Stain them. I don’t care.❞

It’s been a month and a half since Crane’s reign of terror was stopped, leaving Gotham to finally return to normal. But, what is normal? After everything Jason and you have been through, it seems normal might be some unobtainable dream state. But that’s not going to stop either of you from trying and maybe, you’ll get lucky in the end. At the end of it, the two of you have suffered enough, right?

Right?

A/N: We're getting into a little bit more fluff for a bit after this!! lol You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary  and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

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You're on your side facing Jason as your hand laces through his white streak of hair. Jason's eyes look up, watching the strands fall back onto his forehead before he scrucnhes his nose at you and takes your hand in his. His fingers interlace with yours before he kisses the top of your hand.

He thinks of what life could have been like had he hadn't gone to Crane. It's a bit funny because Jason didn't think too much about a life after the manor. Not far into the future but it was always looked at as more of a backup plan. Bruce would inevitably get tired of him and Jason would need a plan to survive. His plans were never anything more than survival-based. But, he has his hand in yours and you're giving him this look that makes him want to melt into his sheets. And he thinks about what it could be like now if you can keep this up, talk it out eventually.

You let him think about a possible future that is not survival-based. Instead, he thinks about fixing up the place and you helping in exchange for some food -- which you would have done anyway. And you'd bring him food on your nights off and he'd bring you food. You'd be a team again. He thinks about being able to come home to you every single night and that very thought makes him feel alive again.

You smile softly at him while Jason finds a yawn fighting its way to the surface.

"Sleep." You whisper to him as your eyes look over his face. "I'll be here when you wake up."

"You sure?" Jason asks, his voice already drenched with sleep.

He doesn't want to sleep. He rarely ever wants to sleep but tonight it's because tomorrow will come and he has no clue where you will stand in the morning light. He just wants to be here but sleep is calling and it always came so easy with you beside him.

You nod your head. "You still get nightmares?" You ask softly. "Especially after what happened tonight?" Jason's eyes dodge to your hands before he nods and looks back to you. "Get some sleep then, Jay." You press a kiss to his forehead. "I promise I'll be here when you wake up. And if you have a nightmare, I'll wake you up, promise."

"Thanks." Jason says softly, wrapping his arm around you and pulling you into him.

Jason falls asleep pretty quickly so after half an hour, you slither out of his grasp and get out of bed. You kind of just left Tim so you want to check on him. But, you won't just leave Jason high and dry. You take his phone and call him on Facetime with yours. You prop his phone up to overlook his bed just so you can keep an eye on him. If you know anything about Jason's sleeping patterns, it's that he will have some sort of nightmare tonight and you'll run right back here.

You make your way back to Jason's training room where you find Tim seated at the table. Tim is facing the board where Jason has some of the equations for Shimmer's heist written. He seems to be in thought but you interrupt anyway.

"Hey." You greet with a half-smile.

"Hey." Tim greets, his smile warm.

"What're you doing?" You ask as you take a seat next to him and set your phone up to lean against a stack of books Jason has on the table so you can see your screen. Tim looks over his shoulder, watching you and you raise a brow. He knows for sure you and Jason are just weird.

"Thinking how I'm gonna get that guy." Tim lets out a sigh.

You nod softly. "You'll get him, we'll help." You offer him a bit of reassurance.

"Thanks, I appreciate it." Tim shakes his head before he turns to face the table. He points at your screen. "What's that about?"

You let out a sigh with the shake of your head, seeing Jason perfectly still on his bed. "If you tell anyone, I will kill you." You threaten and something about it almost makes Tim think you might be serious.

If it were anyone else, you would never admit to anything. If it were almost anyone else, you would have just stayed with Jason but it's Tim. And Tim is the new Robin. Being a vigilante is cool and all, real rewarding and Tim can see the physical scars. He literally died. You know he understands the weight and the consequences but he has not seen the emotional and mental side of being a vigilante. Of being Robin. Maybe he needs to know in order to be prepared so he can reach out for help.

"I won't." Tim assures you.

"I'm only telling you this because you're the new Robin and I think it's important that you know some of that shit that will come with it. I don't expect it to change your mind or anything like that. I just want you to be prepared because Dick wasn't and Jason wasn't." You explain while Tim's face contorts into worry. "He's having a bad night and he has nightmares from everything that's happened, even before he died. It's rough, ya know? So, uh, wanted to check on you but I promised him I'd be there when he woke up. If he has a nightmare, I gotta be there." You shrug a shoulder. "So, I called myself on FaceTime."

Tim lets out a soft laugh. "What are you gonna do when he notices the call?" Tim asks.

"I'm gonna delete the call log, of course." You let out a laugh. "He doesn't need to know."

Tim's smile falls and he'd have never guessed Jason was having a difficult time. Tim doesn't know him well but Jason seems okay to him. "Is it that bad?"

You shrug because honestly...you don't know. You just started talking again. You hate that you don't know. "Guess so." You finally answer. "Uh, with, uh, not talking...I-I don't know." Your brows pull together. "I mean, he died and was thrown into Red Hood and Scarecrow. It was probably terrifying. I'm sure he's processing it but it's been a while." You pull in a breath as you tug the sleeves of your hoodie over your hands.

"I'm sorry you guys haven't talked." Tim says quietly.

"Yeah..." You swallow thickly. "Look, Tim, you're gonna be a great Robin." You offer him a sad smile. "But, I'm telling you this because you're my friend and I saw Dick before he found Nightmare and I saw Jason as Robin and after. Don't let becoming Robin take over your life. You are Tim Drake first. It'll destroy you and your life if you let it consume you. It's awesome and it's cool but be careful."

"It's kind of the coolest thing though. I wanted to be Robin and I chose it." Tim explains. "I'll be fine." Tim says it with confidence and it feels like you're being stabbed.

"You will be. I'm just saying. You gotta let it go sometimes." You nod softly. "Jason let it become this...part of him and without it, he felt like he wasn't anything. Part of that is always going to be on Bruce. And part of that is just...Jason. But...it got him killed so I just...you're gonna be great but don't let it be everything because it'll destroy you." You suck in a breath before you glance to your phone.

He's not going to be Jason. He's learned from watching Dick and Jason and he won't be them. He respects them both and he looks up to them but going after the Joker alone was a horrible decision. It was reckless, thoughtless. Tim won't do that. But, his heart aches for you knowing you're only warning him because of your point of view. Now, he understands what Jason meant by you having a bad opinion of Robin. Robin to you is covered in blood.

Tim nods with understanding. "I won't." Tim promises you. "Can't believe he was really killed." Tim shakes his head softly. "He was Robin, I mean." Tim pauses for a second. "And then Dick." He shakes his head.

"Yeah, me either." You let out a sigh before you move your hair over your shoulder, still damp from the shower.

"Think he'll be okay? Honestly." Tim asks.

"Yeah." You suck in a deep breath. "He'll be okay one day but until then, I'll be here looking after him just to make sure." You regret not being here for him before.

You know Jason has had Bruce. You're still not thrilled with him but...Jason always looked up to him and it's not really your business. You know Jason has Gar and Molly and Dick to talk to. But, you regret not being one of the people he could lean on. You know it's for the best because you can't balance your own trauma and his all the time and he understands. But, you regret it anyway.

"Can I ask you something?" Tim asks bluntly.

"Sure?" You raise a brow at him.

"What's going on with you guys?" Tim questions, gaining the smallest smile that almost turns a little cheeky. You shake your head at him once before your brows tug together. "I'm just asking...you two seem..." Tim pauses, eyes looking to the ceiling and then back to you. "Normal?"

You let out a snort before it turns into a groan. "Yeah...feels kind of normal in a way. I don't know." You shrug. "Thought time would, uh, fix it, I guess. So, we're just...trying to be friends now." You can't help but feel like those words don't seem quite right.

"Oh? Just friends?" Tim mocks you as he glances to your phone.

"Yes." You groan. "It's a thing, I don't know. He's still sorting his shit out, clearly." You blink at Tim. "And so am I...and I'm...a little bit still mad at him and myself so..." You suck in a breath. "Until I can get the fuck over it, friends."

It's easier to tell Tim because he has no loyalty to Jason. Tim doesn't even really know him. Telling Molly almost feels like you're dragging her into your drama and that's not fair. Molly is both of your friends and you've both put her in the middle enough. The same goes for Gar. It feels like you'd be putting Gar in the middle and he'll say he understands but it wasn't really Jason. That doesn't make any of it better.

"What're you mad at him for?" Tim asks.

"Fucking all of it." You let out a scoff as you shrug your shoulders. "We were supposed to be a team and he didn't tell me any of it. I fucking get it, right? Because if he told me, I'd talk him out of it or I'd join him. Or it'd be him confirming to himself that he's not good enough or something. Like I fucking get why he didn't tell me. And I know he did not go out and die on purpose but I'm still so mad because..." You grind your teeth."It was fucking stupid." You huff. "I mean he's smart as hell and...then he just...did that. Like did he not learn from Deathstroke and Dr. Light how this ends?" You can feel the burning start behind your eyes while you bite it back. "It was selfish of him to go off on his own knowing what could happen." You shake your head.

"I don't think he meant for it to be selfish though." Tim offers. "He did know what he was doing." Tim tries his best to offer something in response. "It was the Joker, greater good kind of thing."

"The Joker was not greater good. He did it to prove a point to Bruce." You bite back because you'd love if that were Jason's motive but you know it wasn't. It was always about Bruce and Dick. "I know." You let out a bitter laugh. "I know he wasn't doing it to be selfish which is why I feel guilty for being mad. I know he didn't mean to be selfish or leave me behind or hurt me or die or hurt anyone. I know. But that doesn't make it hurt any less." You roll your eyes. "I'm not...like...furious just...mad sometimes because it still hurts." You confess softly while your eyes go back to your phone.

You forgive him. Every day you forgive him. It's not all that. It's just that it hurts. It hurts thinking about everything that happened. You're the one that ends up feeling selfish, as if this is not your trauma to grieve over because he's alive. It feels like it belongs to Jason and it's not your place so then you feel more guilty and it turns to anger. You have so much hurt and you have no idea where to put it.

"Do think you can forgive him then?" Tim asks. "I mean, he did try to kill like all of you and...everything." Tim clears his throat. "He seems like he's been trying to come back from that."

"I do." You answer simply. "I forgave the second it all happened because Jason Todd is never malicious unwarranted. He's kind and has a heart of gold. It just hurts. It's the realization that what we do is dangerous. We go out every night and we intentionally put ourselves in front of bullets and bombs and knives. And it fucking hurts knowing one of us will not come home one day. And I'm so fucking mad at him for dying. Even if that's not fair to him. So, I forgive him. It just hurts." You shake your head. "So, I chose space."

"What's worse then?" Tim asks. "Thinking one of you won't make it out one day and not talking or actually spending your time together and working it out?" He asks it on purpose because your reason, to him, sounds like a load of bullshit.

Your eyes narrow slightly at him. "I know." You groan. "I know."

"So, instead of telling me this shit that contradicts itself over and over, why didn't you call him? Why are you sitting here with me and not with him?" Tim shakes his head and cuts you off before you can answer. "You were all upset that day at Excellent Gotham because he wasn't answering his phone. It just sounds like a waste of time to me." Tim's voice grows a little bitter as he glances to your phone.

You know damn well part of Tim's impatience is Bernard. Tim's boyfriend is in a coma meanwhile Jason got brought back to life and the two of you chose not to talk despite it all. It does seem very unfair.

"Sorry." You say quietly. "We're, uh...we'll figure it out. There's no way I could go back to not talking to him." You nod at Tim softly. "I'm sorry about Bernard."

"I hope you guys figure it out soon. Everyone agrees, too, by the way." Tim lets out a soft chuckle earning a subtle smile from you. "Just...I wish I had even one extra day with Bernard if we can't figure it out and I don't think I need to be telling you that."

It is really stupid. You know that and you have a feeling Jason does, too. One day just turns into forty-five. Time keeps moving even when it feels like your own world has stopped completely.

"Yeah." You let out a soft sigh.

"How do you deal with this?" Tim questions. "Seeing him like this and getting hurt? I keep thinking about Bernard, worried about him all the time and not knowing what to do. It's hard seeing him like that and...I know he's freaked about me out there."

Seeing each other hurt is arguably the hardest part. There's never anything either one of you can do about it. But, that's just part of the job. You think it's easier for you because even if you think you'd undo it all if given the chance, you still put on the suit every night, too. It's a choice today and you do it anyway. The point is that you choose Jason and he chooses you. Everything in between doesn't really matter at the end of the day and that includes seeing each other hurt and being completely helpless.

"I choose him and he chooses me." You state as if the answer were obvious.

"What does that mean?"

"I mean we choose each other. I am here because I choose him and he'd have kicked me out a long time ago if he didn't choose me, too. Seeing someone you care about hurt all the time fucking sucks. It hurts and you're worried but it's something that they do. It means something to them so even though it sucks, you choose them. Choosing them means choosing the pain that tags along with it." You explain simply. "I know that's....ironic given our current state but, uh, that's the answer. I still choose him even when he is being an asshole." You say but there's a fond smile coming to your lips. "Even when he's training himself into the ground. And I know he chooses me. We choose each other and that makes it easier."

"I choose Bernard but I don't know if he's going to choose me after this." Tim confesses as you watch the defeat wash over his face. "I think it might get too hard for him."

"He knows you're a Titan and he does know what comes along with the whole vigilante thing." You offer with kindness. "I think he knows what he's getting into." You let out a soft laugh. "And it's gonna be hard." You widen your eyes at him. "You'll come home covered in blood and bruises one day and he'll clean you up but even if he brushes it off, you'll be able to tell he's worried about you."

"He didn't think I was ready."

"You weren't." You chortle. "You're lucky we found you. You'd be dead again if not." You nod your head.

"I'm not that bad." Tim groans.

"I could disarm you in less than five seconds and Jason could kill you in under one." You deadpan.

"Okay maybe I need a little help." Tim chuckles softly.

"You'll figure it out and Bernard sounds great anyway. It'll be hard for both of you but like...it's also the easiest thing I've ever done. So, you'll figure it out." You assure him.

"Yeah..." Tim lets out a sigh. "He is pretty great."

"Bring him to Gotham when you fix him. I'd love to meet him." You smile widely.

"Please, don't hurt him." Tim blinks at you.

"I won't." You cackle. "Unless he's actually like a shit person then I'll be obligated." You tease Tim.

"Thanks." Tim rolls his eyes back. "You should get back to Jason. I'm fine. Thanks for checking on me and talking." Tim nods his head a few times as he gestures towards your phone.

"Yeah." You sigh before you get to your feet, grabbing your phone. "Thanks for the talk, too, by the way." You offer him a gentle smile. "Get some sleep, Tim. Got more training and shit to do tomorrow." You scrunch your nose as you head for the door.

"Goodnight." Tim nods softly at you.

"Goodnight, Tim."

Jason wakes up early in the morning, the sun peaking through the blinds of his bedroom. His arm is wrapped around your shoulders as your head is rested on his chest. A tender smile pulls at his lips and he's shocked he didn't have a nightmare. He swears, this time, it's because you were here. Despite his hatred for being exposed, you have always made him feel more comfortable. Jason is capable of taking care of himself and he's proven that time and time again but when he's alone, when he's with others, he doesn't feel safe.

The first thing Jason does whenever encountering another person, even just walking past them on a street, is look for a weapon of some sort. Jason knows every entrance and exit of every building he's ever going into with a thought-out escape plan and a backup plan just in case. He doesn't like his back to windows or doors, hates turning his back to other people. Being killed has skyrocketed his paranoia and that seeps into his dreams and his sleep. But, with you, he doesn't feel that sense of paranoia.

You're always on guard, too. Jason's always noticed it. You sit at the far booth at Excellent Gotham because you don't like people sitting behind you. You always kept two knives in your nightstand drawer and hid a few around the room Jason is sure you don't realize he knew about. Something about you always being on guard, makes him not feel so alone in it. Different experiences but same responses. Jason can handle himself just fine but with you around, he knows you'd come between him and anything and everything that ever even looked at him funny. He hates that part but it does make him feel safer. Two against one. Unbeatable force. Just him and you.

You stir awake slowly. Whenever you're worried about him because he's having a hard night, you don't sleep as heavy. You're always on guard for him. Your eyes peek open before you look up to him. He gives you this awkward smile that makes your stomach twist.

"Morning." Jason's morning voice hits your ears and you want him to talk forever.

"Morning." You echo.

"Thanks for staying." Jasn's voice is quiet as his fingers trace lightly over your t-shirt-covered shoulder.

You hum softly, a tender smile tugging at your lips. Your eyes close as you snuggle closer to his chest. "I'll always stay if you ask."

Jason pulls you closer to him and he almost kisses the top of your head but that's not his place. The reality is that he knows last night was probably a one-time thing. You can't go from not speaking to suddenly fixing it all in one night. It just doesn't work that way and as much as he hates the whole talking thing, there's a lot you would have to talk about beforehand. He worries that talk would change your mind if you wanted this to go somewhere. So, he just holds you close to him and lives in this moment, cherishing it for all it's worth.

Your thumb runs over his side softly as you process your conversation with Tim from the night before. There's a lot you left out in the conversation. It's not as easy as just blurting out that you love him and it's the easiest thing you've ever done. Things are complicated now. Everything is tangled in hurt. There was something so special about the night before with Jason and it felt like it should. Just him and you, there for each other no matter what. You think it may have healed a part of your soul. Molly asked if you were done punishing yourself and you are not but...maybe it can be a start because for some reason, he forgives you.

"I'm sorry." You whisper.

Jason's brows pull together as he looks down to you. "For what?"

"Everything." You say, making sure to not look up to him.

"I don't..." Jason pauses. "What do you mean?" Jason questions.

"Stuff with Crane, not calling."

"It's okay." Jason says immediately, not sure what you're so sorry for when it comes to Crane. "Not really your fault."

You finally look up to him. "I wasn't all that right though." You admit. "I hurt you and I just...I'm sorry, Jay."

"It's okay." Jason assures you.

In Jason's mind, you don't have anything to apologize for. Everything you did, you did for him. You did it to protect him, to help him. If it weren't for Jason's decisions, none of it would have happened. He hopes you aren't beating yourself up too much over this. You don't deserve it.

"We'll figure it out, right?" You ask, making sure you're on the same page without having to ask anything else.

Jason nods with a smile. "Yeah, we usually do."

You give him a tender smile. "Good, cause, uh, it'd be nice to get...back to something." You pull in a breath and you watch as Jason's face relaxes.

"Would be." Jason offers you grin. "You and me?"

"You and me." You beam back at him before Jason pulls you into him once more.

Jason chuckles softly. "Well, we should probably get up then." Jason states. "Got a plan for the day."

"Which is?" You ask without making an attempt to get up.

"Let the group find me." Jason states casually.

Your eyes close for a second before you push off of his chest to sit all the way up. You blink at him a few times, waiting and hoping for the punchline to leave his mouth. Unfortunately, Jason just blinks back at you.

"That sounds fucking stupid." You scoff, almost certain he's lost his mind again.

"Thank you." Jason quips back. "We throw Tim to the wolves, watch from the shadows." Jason says it so casually as if this is something he does all the time.

"Uh-huh." You nod your head. "And hope he improved?"

"You know he has." Jason quips back. "We train a bit, get ready to patrol again, and kind of set him up to work on his own here before we leave. He's gotta learn to do it on his own before we send him back and he's gonna go back tomorrow." Jason explains his side as he sits up, resting his hands behind him.

"No, yeah, no I agree." You nod. You hate the idea, especially since Jason is already paranoid. Letting Shimmer's gang find him sets off a major red flag but you figure you'll go along with it for now. "Alright, follow your lead."

The two of you get up and get dressed before you head down to the training room where you find Tim, you starting to wonder if he ever sleeps. Though, if he doesn't, you can't say you blame him. Worrying can be a bit tiring but it has a habit of keeping people wide awake. The three of you get your breakfast going, this time just a few bowls of cereal with coffee. Once everyone is done with your food, the three of you get ready for training.

You start how you did before, Jason taking the first round which naturally led Tim to get hit in the face and knocked down more than a few times but Tim always gets right back up. You take the second turn and something similar happens but Tim is able to stay on his feet longer and he's able to block more. He's improving and quickly.

After a few rounds of sparing, Jason gets Tim connected to some weights to try and tug them while he tries to reach Jason. Tim ends up falling backwards while Jason and you laugh and then you take a turn. You work on weapon work for another hour after that, split between his staff and knife/blade throwing. Tim much prefers his staff but he does as told and his aim really isn't bad. Once you're done there, you go back to sparring for another hour, this time, the three of you against each other.

Jason attacks Tim first as you go for Jason and then once Tim fends off Jason, he goes for you. The three of you split your time trying to get the others down. Tim finds his footing a bit better this time, choosing to focus most of his attention on you at first. He only uses defence against Jason figuring you aren't a better fighter, you'll be easier to get down even with your clairvoyance. Tim's been mentally taking notes of everything Jason does in order to beat you and he applies to his fighting. It takes Tim a little while but he's able to grab your arm just as you come for him and he flips you onto the ground. He's back on his feet in seconds before Jason can make his move.

You move yourself to the side and you watch, happy with your friend. You easily could have gotten back up, you could have turned the tables on him but the point is that he got you down and now he just needs to get there with Jason. And then Jason gets Tim down and offers Tim a hand. Jason being Jason, doesn't let go of Tim's hand once Tim is on his feet. Instead, Jason twists Tim's arm behind his back and Tim lets out a yell before Tim punches Jason in the face, sending Jason's head back and loosening his grip just enough for Tim to get free. Tim twists Jason's arm behind his back and just as Jason goes to elbow him in the face, Tim blocks him and flips Jason onto his back. Before Tim can land the lasting punch, Jason throws Tim off to the side and gets to his knee. The two of them match their positions, breathing heavily while you clap softly.

"Look at you, Tim!" You cheer.

Jason looks behind Tim to you and offers you a gentle glare before he gets to his feet, Tim following immediately, unsure if they're still sparring. "Good." Jason nods at him with sincerity. "Now that you're warmed up, suit up and meet us downstairs." Jason states as he turns his back to start leaving the room.

You get to your feet to start following Jason.

"Suit up?" Tim questions as you walk past him.

"You're Robin, aren't you?" You quip as you put a hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah?"

"So, suit up." You shrug your shoulders before spinning on your heels and following Jason out.

You and Jason meet back in his room, Jason already grabbing his gear by the time you get there.

"He alright?" Jason asks, not looking over his shoulder.

"Yeah." You laugh softly. "He did pretty well, I think." You grab your case with your suit against the wall.

"Guess we'll find out. They should be here soon."

"I still think this is stupid, Jay." You warn him. "What're you gonna do now that they know where you live? Does that not seem like a flaw in your plan?"

Jason looks over his shoulder and raises his brows at you. "Nope."

To Jason, it doesn't really matter. Shimmer's gang has been relocating every few days, constantly staying on the move now that they know Red Hood is after them. Jason could track them down but he's been a little busy lately and this way is easier. This way, they come right to him, thinking they've outsmarted the Red Hood. They'll come in all confident, Tim will get some training, and Jason will kill them anyway. It's a win for everyone.

"Ah," You nod your head, finally putting the pieces together. "You know, if Tim knew, he would not be happy and neither would Dick."

Jason turns around fully, his gear in hand. "What? You suddenly get a fucking moral compass or some shit?"

"No." You let out a scoff. "I'm just saying." You shrug. "You lure them here to train Tim and then you kill them after." You think that's also dumb. Dick is gonna be pissed and Tim will be mad. Maybe keeping the peace while Tim is still in town is a good idea.

"Was going to anyway." Jason shrugs his shoulders.

"Obviously." You scoff again.

Of all people, Jason didn't expect you to give him a hard time about it. You share the same moral compass. Jason knows the reason you're the vigilante you are today is because you were thrown to the wolves. Between Deathstroke and Cadmus breaking into the tower, the stuff with Jerry, you had to do it on your own. Jason had to do it on his own and so did Dick and Bruce. Sometimes, that's how it has to be done and he expects you to understand even if you don't agree with the method. If Tim knows you're going to be there to bail him out, he'll never understand the gravity of anything.

Jason doesn't want another Robin killed either.

"Look, he's not gonna know unless you tell him." Jason scoffs back. "And didn't you involve Gar? You didn't seem to give a fuck then."

"That was different." You huff with the roll of your eyes.

"Because you did it and I'm doing it. But, I'm doing it to train Tim and make sure he doesn't get himself killed." Jason grinds his teeth and he's not entirely sure why this is even annoying him but it is. Maybe the paranoia and anxiety of this situation is starting to chew at him.

You nod your head, looking to the floor, realizing why. "No." You look back to him. "Jay, he's not you." You suck in a breath.

You think about how Tim would never go after the Joker by himself and he wouldn't go to Crane. You think about how Tim does have the Titans on his side and he has since day one, unlike Jason. Unlike Jason, Tim has a whole team to back him. Tim has a lot to prove but it's different. You think his differences from Jason and Dick will save his life.

"I mean that just because it happened to you, doesn't mean it'll happen to him." Your voice is small as your eyes finally meet his.

"Our job is to make sure it doesn't." Jason nods his head once. "Look, I'll call Babs, have her to take care of 'em just until Tim's outta town."

You nod in agreement. "That's a far better plan. Not sure what you'll do about Shimmer knowing where you live."

"I'll handle it."

"Mhm." You hum, unconvinced.

"Don't worry so fucking much." Jason offers you a grin, earning him an eye roll.

"Stop making me worry." You raise your brows at him.

You turn around and head for the bathroom down the hall to change, leaving Jason to change on his own. In all fairness, he really didn't think too much about how it would affect Tim if he knew what Jason's plan was anyway. The end result would be the same regardless. Jason has enough faith in Tim for this to go in his favor. He didn't think it would matter too much but it does. He knows eventually him and Dick will butt heads again over this, hopefully, it'll blow over again. He knows him and Bruce will always be at odds with it. It's just complicated and he wishes it weren't.

You and Jason meet in the hallway, Tim already downstairs. The two of you head for the stairwell and lean against the wall to watch the show.

"Security alert." The computer calls from the speakers, gaining Tim's attention. "Permiter intrusion." The computer says while Tim walks over to the laptop on the counter.

"There's the asshole." A man states once inside the building. "Get him."

Two men and two woman charge Tim from the front just as Tim pulls out his staff but before he gets it ready, another man comes up from behind him and attacks him, shoving him to the ground.

"Shimmer sends her regards." The man behind Tim states.

Right before the man can land a kick to Tim's head, Tim spins around and gets up to his feet. Tim blocks and gets a few hits in quickly but three of them jump him and he gets down on the ground. You take a step forward before Jason grabs your arm, shaking his head at you. You widen your eyes at him but Jason keeps his grip.

Tim gets back on his feet as they keep attacking him but then, Tim lands a solid hit to one of them. And then another and another one. He picks up some of the stuff on the floor and uses them as weapons to keep his distance from them. They're still able to get him on the ground again but this time, Tim does a better job at fending them off until he's back on his feet.

He uses a chair as a weapon this time, he uses it to pin one of the men to the wall while he punches one of the women until she backs away. Tim focuses on the man against the wall and he gets him down. The last man is quick though and he grabs Tim. Tim tries to fight him off but the man grabs Tim by the neck and picks him up, pinning him against the wall while he tries to strangle him. You try to help again but Jason lightly pulls you back and shakes his head.

"He's fine." He whispers. "You can't bail him out."

"He's being strangled." You whisper through gritted teeth.

"Give him a minute." Jason urges, nodding his head towards Tim just as Tim grabs the lightbulb from above him and smashes it on the man's head, sending him to the ground.

Tim pulls himself up using the counter but before he can catch his breath, the last woman grabs Tim and pulls him back before smashing him against the counter. Tim grabs the laptop this time and uses it to finish off the last two people. He gets them both down quickly but with a lot of effort. Jason smiles at you before he lets you go.

"Told you." Jason states before he starts walking down the stairs

"Uh-huh." You nod your head before you roll your eyes as you follow him, feeling relieved Jason was right.

"Hey." Jason calls as him and you make your way to Tim. "You owe me a new laptop." Jason points at Tim, still closing the distance between them. "The dustbuster I'll forget about cause it was broken anyways."

"You were watching and didn't help?!" Tim looks at the two of you, still catching his breath and very clearly unhappy.

"Actually, I'm surprised it took Shimmer's gang this long to get here after I let them triangulate my location." Jason states as he walks past Tim, looking around at the people knocked out on the floor.

"Let them?!" Tim questions, still very annoyed and even feeling a little betrayed. He could been seriously hurt or worse!

Jason turns around. "You learn by doing." Jason states, closing the distance between them. "Not being coddled." Jason sticks out his hand, shaking Tim's. "You're welcome." Jason states before he walks past Tim. "Nicely done." Jason calls from further down the hallway.

"Thanks." Tim states before he looks to you. "Is he always like that?"

You laugh softly before you nod your head. "You get used to him." You give a soft smile. "You did well though."

"I got my ass kicked. They could have killed me."

"Oh, we were watching the entire time. Actually," You state. "I wanted to jump in but Jason stopped me. He was right, ya know? You can handle yourself." You beam at him. "You're gonna be a great Robin, Tim." You say as you start walking past him. "Come on, we got your guy to find." You call before Tim is quick behind you, feeling confident in his role as Robin.

The three of you get back a few hours later, Tim a little defeated with not finding Venta but in good spirits overall. Being able to fight off Shimmer's gang has proven to do a lot for his confidence. He was able to fight off four people all by himself which is something he could not have done a few days ago. And his interrogation skills have also gotten significantly better. Jason has actually enjoyed watching him grow.

It's different seeing someone else in the suit. Growing up, he got to see Dick be Robin and that was cool enough. A kid got to go out with Batman and kick ass. But, Dick was always...unobtainable. How he carried himself as Robin, the flips, his fighting, everything he did was always so perfect. It was different because he was the first and he set such a high standard. Jason got to fill that role and he knows he was good at it. Different than Dick, but good. Suddenly, Robin wasn't unobtainable, he was real and tangible. Now, though, with Tim, Jason is seeing everything he failed at as Robin and how he got in his own way.

If Jason were set up like this, he would have been livid. He would have put up hell and not listened. He would have gotten in his own way to not learn anything because he knew best and no one believed he was good enough. It would take a few days alone for him to be able to swallow his own pride and get over it. Tim though, he just...listens. He takes notes and he works relentlessly. He's incredibly smart, too which is going to benefit him. Over the last few days, any bit of jealousy or bitterness Jason was biting down has vanished.

Tim's going to be a better Robin.

Once the three of you get changed, Jason lets Tim know it's probably best he head out. Apparently, Dick texted him and he needs him back in Metropolis by tomorrow. So, the three of you get everything squared away and head down the hallway.

"Sorry I gotta kick you out." Jason states. "I have a rule about new Robins, five days max." Jason states as you finish your walk down the first flight of stairs, stopping on the landing to the next.

"It's all good." Tim says with a kindness in his voice. "I gotta get back anyway. Check on my boyfriend." Tim states as he stands by the stairs, Jason leaning against the railing while you stand right beside him.

"If we hear about your guy Venta, we'll hit you." Jason states. "Sorry, it was a bust."

"Yeah, sorry, it really sucks." You add in.

"I'm glad I came." Tim states, closing some of the distance between him and Jason. "I got to meet the great Red Hood." Tim says, lightly poking Jason's chest with the name.

Jason lets out a chuckle. "Was I on your fucking bucket list?"

"Kind of. Yeah." Tim chuckles sheepishly. "And I got to work with Bluejay, finally."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." You widen your eyes. "Not the first time."

"That was different." Tim chuckles.

"Well, good luck in Metropolis." Jason states. "And if shit hits the fan, just hide behind Raven and Starfire."

"Got it." Tim nods his head before he heads down them.

Jason and you start to make your way back from you came before Jason takes out a set of keys. "Enjoy the ride home." Jason states, tossing them over the railing, Tim catching them.

"Be safe and don't do anything stupid." You warn with a cheeky smile before you and Jason walk off.

The two of you get back to the training room, silence filling the air while Jason grabs a beer for himself and a blue Gatorade for you. You both stand in front of the board with the ciphers while Jason shakes his head.

Jason pulls out his phone before he presses Dick's contact. He sends Dick to speakerphone.

"How'd it go?" Dick asks without even a hello.

"Sending him back to you in one piece." Jason says.

"Didn't suspect a thing and he did great." You add in.

"Hope you didn't go too easy on him." Dick says.

"Don't worry, we didn't." Jason states. "And, Dick," Jason pauses, glacing to you and then back to the whiteboard. "He'll be a better Robin than me." Jason states before hanging up the phone and taking a drink of his beer before he walks off to the computers.

"Think he'll be a better Robin than you?" You question as you follow Jason over to the monitors before you take a seat, the Gatorade starting to sweat in your hands.

Jason sits beside you. "Don't you?"

You let out a sigh. "I don't know." You shrug. "He'll be incredible, like you just different."

Jason lets out a chuckle. "Right." Jason takes another drink as the room falls silent.

Tim is gone. He's officially going back to Metropolis which means it's up to you and Jaosn to keep talking on your own accord. You agreed to and you want to, it's just that, now it feels a little weird. You both have no obligation to hang out or talk again. You're living separate lives for the first time in a year. Neither of you like it too much, it just feels like you're fumbling over your own feet and neither of you have any idea what you're supposed to do. It was so much easier before you dated because at least you didn't know. You both had nothing to lose but now it feels like everything is on the line. All of your feelings were broadcast to each other and you saw each other for who you really are. You can't unsee it. It's weird trying to figure out where you're supposed to go from here.

You have to talk.

Jason clears his throat. "So..."

"So..." You echo, keeping your stare forward.

"Should we, uh, talk about last night?" Jason rips the bandaid off, hating the words as they leave his lips.

"Oh, uh, yeah, okay." You nod your head, sucking in a breath before you crack open the seal of the Gatorade. "W-what's, uh, what's up?"

Jason was hoping, you'd pick up the conversation even though he's the one that started it. He talked to Leslie about this and then he thought about it and regretted it all day. But, she had some advice and words of wisdom for him and he can't help but shake the thought that she's probably right. That is her job. If Jason doesn't want to be where he was two months ago, he needs to get help and he needs to actually accept it when it is given to him even if it's like swallowing glass.

"I, uh, just...we're good, right?" Jason asks.

"Yeah?" You furrow your brows at him.

Before, he was so ready to date you. It was easy. You were already basically dating and the more he thinks about the time you had, the more he realizes, you were dating before you were dating. You took your time to build a friendship and be comfortable in that before you got together. Yes, you both should have worked on all of your trauma first but it was comforting. It felt like you were both ready for something and you were, even if it didn't work out the first time. But, this time, it doesn't feel that way.

You're sitting here in silence because there's too much between you. Jason is still doing a lot of work to become someone he can live with. He's still trying to cope with everything that has happened. It's not him self-sabotaging this time. Leslie said if he's thinking this hard about it and he doesn't feel like he's ready, maybe he's not. Even if all he wants is you all the time. It wouldn't be fair to either of you if he's not ready.

Jason lets out a groan before he runs a hand through he white streak of hair. "I'm not ready for anything. I'm sorry." Jason blurts it out before he can back out.

Your heart plummets to your feet as a lump shoots up to your throat. You aren't either and you don't think you want anything now but it hurts.

"Oh, yeah." You nod quickly. "Me either." You nod in agreement. "It's just...still a lot to deal with. One time thing, last night."

"Yeah." Jason nods his head in agreement but he doesn't want you to pull away. He knows you better than anyone and he knows you want to. He sees it across your face, he could see it all week. He gets why everyone is worried about you. "You can say no." Jason starts, earning your full attention. "Do you just...wanna go back to before?" Jason asks softly. "Like fuck it, friends and still fuck with each other, ya know? Before it all went to shit and we just see where it goes again?" Jason takes a sip of his beer, trying to run the nerves from his shoulders. "Could've worked last time."

The lump in your throat starts to disappear as the weight starts to lift from your chest. "Yeah, yeah, I don't know if we could be friends any other way anyway." You smile softly. "And seeing where it goes would be nice." You feel your cheek start to warm.

"Yeah, guess we just can't help it, huh?" Jason chuckles, looking to the beer bottle in his hands.

"Reflex." You chuckle quietly. "Funny though, cause uh, this is like the third time we've agreed to be friends, Jay." You scrunch your nose at him. "In one way or another."

"Yeah." Jason gives you an awkward chuckle. "I wasn't sure what that meant to you."

"Me either." You admit with a laugh. "Just like before I guess." You roll your shoulders.

"Good cause I really don't think I could help it." Jason flashes you a quick smirk.

"That's because you're a shithead." You beam at him.

"Wouldn't have me any other way, babe." Jason quips back.

"Nope." You agree before you take a drink of the Gatorade. You pull out your phone, checking the time. "Well, I have to go, actually." You say softly as you get up.

"Molly?" Jason asks.

"No, actually." You shake your head. "Just...some stuff." You roll your shoulders.

Jason nods once, offering a raised brow. "Fucking ominous all of a sudden."

"Worried about me, Jay?" You quip with a cheeky grin.

"Maybe." Jason states but he doesn't match you with a grin or smirk this time.

"I'm fine. It's nothing. I'll text you though?" You offer with hopeful eyes.

"Yeah, yeah, alright." Jason shakes his head, deciding to bite the bullet. He doesn't want to be guessing when you'll meet up again. "You busy tomorrow?"

You feel a rush of heat spread across your cheeks. "If you count my usual run to Excellent Gotham and a movie with Molly, nope." You let out a soft laugh. "Why?"

"You're right, place is kind of a mess." Jason looks around and he's leaning his elbow back against the desk, trying his hardest to play it cool.

You see right through him. Something about Jason is despite his charisma, he can be really bad at trying to play cool. Half the time he just looks awkward and out of place. Somehow though, you find it that much more endearing.

"It is a mess." You nod in agreement.

"Wanna help me out with that?" Jason gives you a cheeky smile.

"You want me to help you clean with our renewed friendship?" You gasp, dramatically clutching your heart. "I feel so used!"

"Shut the fuck up." Jason groans, leaning forward before he lets out a laugh. "Come on, could be fun. Help me fix up the place."

"Dunno, Jay. Why would I wanna help?" You cross your arms but the corners of your mouth are tugged into a smile.

Jason knows he's won.

"Your track record says you'll be here more than you're home. Might as well help." Jason quips back.

He hopes you keep the same track record.

You laugh because you know he's probably right. You hope he's right.

"That's sounding more like an offer to come over whenever I want." You raise with the raise of your brows.

Jason shrugs softly. "Help me fix it up and you get a key and a code."

Your heart skips a beat as you look to your shoes, a smile splitting your face. "Fine." You look back at him as you roll your eyes sarcastically. "I guess you've convinced me."

Jason holds his head with pride as if it was some tough argument he won. "Text you the time then, we gotta get some supplies."

"Yeah, like a few gallons of bleach and home defense. I've seen like ten spiders and I'm not staying here anymore until they are dead." You gesture the Gatorade at him before you take another drink.

"Saw a centipede earlier." Jason lets out a chortle.

You shutter at the very thought. "I'm going the fuck home. You better find that thing and kill it so fucking help me. If I see one of those, I'm done."

Jason gives off this hearty laugh that you swear you can feel in your bloodstream. "You walk in front of fucking knives for fun, babe. A centipede?"

"First of all, knives don't have those fucking creepy legs, Jason." You say with a straight face. "If a meta shows up and they're like a centipede in any way, I will move out of the fucking city I'm so fucking serious. I would rather live in Central City or Metropolis." You nod your head quickly, your skin crawling the more you think about it.

"That's really impressive." Jason continues to laugh. "I'll find the centipedes." Jason assures you as he laughs. Your eyes dart around the room, now feeling uneasy. "You're looking for one now aren't you?"

"So fucking done. I'm going home. Text me what time." You wave your hand, nearly high-tailing it out of the room.

On the way home, you take a detour to pick up food for you and Molly. When you get home, Molly is just entering the kitchen wearing a soft smile. The two of you greet each other before you go off to wash up and Molly gets the table ready, the takeout from Batburger laid out on your respective spots.

"How'd it go?" Molly asks as soon as you enter the kitchen.

"Good. Tim can fend for himself now. Took out some of Shimmer's gang and now he's on his way back to Metropolis." You explain before you pull out your chair and take your seat.

"Really?" Molly chimes. "I knew you guys could train him."

"We did, too but thank you." You laugh softly as you unwrap your food. "Hopefully, it'll work out. I guess things are getting a bit messy? Dick didn't elaborate too much." You explain.

"What about Gar?" Molly asks.

"Didn't talk to him? Why? Did he say something to you?" You raise a brow of concern at Molly before you take your phone from your pocket to double-check you don't have a message from anyone concerning Gar.

"No." Molly shakes her head, not sure if she's supposed to tell you everything about The Red. "Just curious."

You eye Molly carefully while Molly diverts her attention to her fries. There's a lot to discuss when it comes to Tim and his training if Molly is really curious. There's a lot to discuss over everything that's happened the last few days that does not involve Gar. The more you think about it, the more you're realizing Molly has been talking to him more than you have over the last week.

You narrow your eyes at Molly as your brows furrow. "So...you're asking me if Gar elaborated on the shitshow or if Dick said anything about Gar? Because we both know those are wildly different questions." You pose.

"Both, I guess." Molly picks up a fry, trying to play it casual.

"No, Dick not mention Gar. It was a pretty quick call about Tim. And I have not talked to Gar over the last two days." You finish. "You talk to Gar more than I do though so...?" You let out a soft laugh as you eat.

"What?" Molly snaps her attention to you. "I do not." Molly's cheeks burn as she looks back to her food.

You let out a snort. "Yeah, you do." You nod as you point a fry at Molly. "You're always talking to him."

"How would you even know?" Molly snips. "Wait, did he say something?!" Molly's eyes widen as she leans in. You nod your head with a knowing grin and Molly's face deflates. "I do not."

You snicker softly. "Whatever you say." You roll your eyes with a smile. "He okay?"

"Yeah, he's okay. I was just wondering." Molly shrugs as she eats a fry, hoping you now drop it entirely.

"Right, okay." You laugh softly. "Something going on? You're acting kind of weird."

"No." Molly answers shortly. "I was just curious." Molly nods her head at you. "Anyway," Molly chooses to switch the subject herself, knowing the second she brings up Jason, you will drop it. "You and Jason?"

You glare softly at Molly before you roll your shoulders and look back to your food. "Made out last night."

Molly nods. "Of course you did."

"Okay fuck you." You scoff.

"Did you really not see that coming?" Molly questions.

"No..." You answer, paritally lying.

"Right, you told me the whole rundown of you two managed to fall into a relationship together. The only people who are going to be surprised by this turn of events is you two. Honestly," Molly states casually. "I'm surprised you didn't sleep with him."

Your jaw hangs ajar as your brows furrow. "Fucking ow." You huff even though Molly probably has some sort of point.

Molly laughs loudly. "It's true!" Molly defends. "So, let me guess." Molly starts as you wave haphazardly at her. "You two did not talk but you did agree to be friends." Molly explains earning herself a displeased nod from you. "But."

"Oh, there's a but!" You say dramatically.

"Isn't there always?" Molly quips. "But, friends for you two does not mean what it means to literally every other sane person on the planet. So, I bet this will keep happening until you manage to fall into another relationship."

You blink at her. "Well..." You try to find the right words because no part of what Molly is saying isn't true.

You all but agreed that's basically what'll end up happening. You're starting to wonder if giving Molly the full play-by-play was a good idea. Maybe you should just bring Gar up again.

"You could just have the conversation." Molly suggests.

"Fuck that." You scoff before you laugh. "We did kind of talk?" You state. "He's not ready for anything and that's fine." You ramble. "I'm not either."

Molly lets out a sigh. "Why not?" She asks because you've never given her a clear answer on why you've avoided Jason over the last month. "I know you guys went through some traumatic stuff but what's holding you, specifically, back? You seem happy hanging out with him again."

You pick at your food. If you tell Molly, Molly will tell you it's ridiculous. A part of you knows it is but it's how you feel. It's hard to even put it all into words because it always boils down to guilt and regret. Everything else just piles onto it and it gives you more reasons to run even if that's not entirely fair. But, maybe part of your problem is that you don't tell anyone.

"Ya know, uh, he was the first person that, uh, made me not feel so alone after my mom died." You confess. "I had you at first." You add on quickly. "But...you didn't really get it then. He did. He wasn't someone I could disappoint because he got it and he was willing to just...be there."

Molly sighs softly. "Yeah, Jason is a pretty understanding person when people give him the chance to be."

"Yeah..." You shrug. "So, uh, I know that I made him feel the same way but then...I did leave him alone. He had Crane and that was it but he didn't really have him, right? Because Crane was sending him into withdrawal and holding him captive. And manipulating him and everything. I left and he was alone." You pause for a few seconds. "I don't think he deserves someone who leaves." You state. "It's what I do and you know that so don't try and make me feel better about it. I get freaked so I run."

"That's not what happened though." Molly defends.

"Isn't it?" You scoff. "He was on the brink of fuck knows what and I left. I can try to convince myself all I want that it was for his own good but what if it wasn't? What if I didn't wanna find him fucking dead somewhere again?"

"That has never been your reason. You did the right thing. It was your decision to leave that snapped some sense into him."

"I don't know." You shake your head with a defeated sigh. "I just wish we could go back to being who were then, before it all. Last night, it felt like we were those people again. It was the first night in months I didn't feel like the world was crumbling under my feet." Your voice goes small as you look to your half-eaten meal.

"You can be those people. You can talk, you've done it before. What is the worst thing that's going to happen if you tell him what you just told me?"

"He says it back." You answer without hesitation.

"What?" Molly shakes her head in confusion. "Why would that be bad? Don't you want him--"

"I gotta go." You shake your head as you stand up abruptly. "We're friends and we agreed that we're just going to go back to how it was before and see where it goes. We always functioned better that way. It's fine." You toss your half-eaten meal into the bag.

"Y/n." Molly calls softly. "What is going on with you?"

"Nothing. I just...he seems good besides last night. That's all that really matters to me." You say with a soft nod. "I'll be back. I gotta do something and then patrol, so I'll call you when I need you." You grab your case and head for the door.

"Come on, don't go." Molly calls but you ignore her as you open the door. "Y/n." Molly calls more sternly this time, watching the door stutter before it finally shuts on your way out. Molly lets out a groan and you're going to hate her for it, but she pulls out her phone anyway.

Jason is seated at the table in a room he plans to make into a kitchen, cleaning his guns. There's something calming about it. He concentrates on it and it lets him clear his head in the same way some people find jigsaw puzzles calming. It's a good thing to decompress after the last few days. Tim is a little exhausting with all of his excitement, something Jason does not blame him for at all. And then everything with you has left his head a little fuzzy.

His phone vibrates against the table, Jason glancing at it to see Molly's name on the screen.

"Hey." Jason answers as he puts Molly on speaker.

"Are you busy?"

Jason looks to his guns across the table and then to his phone. "Not really. Why? What's up?"

"Can you do me a favor?" Molly asks and Jason can hear the concern and hesitance in her voice.

"Sure?" Jason questions as his heart starts to sink. "What is it?"

"Can you find her for me?" Molly asks with a weary tone.

"Why?" Jason freezes immediately, not liking the idea.

What if you were kidnapped on your way home? Everything was going well and you really didn't seem weird when you left. It's been a few hours now and Jason is certain Molly would have called sooner had she not heard from you. Jason tries his best to not immediately jump into a tailspin of panic.

"She's up to something and she will not tell me a damn thing. She goes out a few nights a week before patrol, shutting her phone and everything off so I can't track her. She just left." Molly explains, pushing her own guilt of invading your privacy away.

"Are you asking me to stalk my ex-girlfriend?" Jason asks, knowing this a bad idea but relieved you haven't been kidnapped.

Jason knows if Molly is asking, she has a reason to be worried. He's heard it from all of their friends. They're worried and he doesn't know why. But, Jason also set up a line he doesn't really want to cross just because you're being weird. You're secretive. Those two things don't seem to be things Molly should be worried about.

"No...just...okay kind of." Molly groans. "Come on, Jason. I'm worried and she won't tell me what's going on."

Jason sighs, deciding to hear Molly's side. "Why did she leave?" Jason asks. "What'd she say? She's a creature of habit."

"That she had to go. She had to do something before patrol." Molly answers. "She kind of does that. We'll be talking and then when she doesn't want to talk, she just...leaves." Molly omits the conversation topic.

"Sounds like her." Jason answers, trying not to get too worried.

"I know you're worried, too." Molly states. "You said you were that first night she stayed with you."

Jason texted Molly after you all got back, letting her know you were all fine but he was worried. He didn't know what was going on with you and he thought it was just him being worried because a roof fell on you. But, Molly wasn't real assuring in her texts.

"Fine but if she starts bitching, you gotta deal with it. I'm not taking the heat from her because she's pissed I found her. You check the zoo?" Jason finishes up with the gun he was working on before he stands up and gets moving.

"Of course, I did. She's not there or the theater. Or Harbor. I don't know where she goes."

"I'll go find her. I'll let you know when I find her." Jason says.

"Thank you. I owe you."

"Yeah." Jason says before he hangs up.

The last thing he wants to do is invade your privacy when you're finally on good terms. But, Molly doesn't worry for nothing. As much as he hates her worrying, and he says he's fine, Molly worries for good reason, especially after everything. And Jason knows there's something going on.

You have never been a very good liar when it comes to him. Truthfully, a part of him thought finding out the truth would just be too painful because for all he knows, there's someone else. That could have been a reason for your weirdness but after last night, that kind of gets thrown to the wasteside. That leaves Jason on the same page as Molly. Worried.

Once Jason is in his gear, he heads out to look for you. He checks the usual spots first and then he checks his. You aren't at either of them which Jason is now finding to be weird. Like he told Molly, you're a creature of habit, you go to the same places. If you want to be alone, you're always at these places. So, Jason calls Barbara and asks about the case you're working, to see if there's a sort of safe house they're keeping some of the women. Barbara is able to offer him an address you might be. Unfortunately, you aren't there either.

A part of Jason actually thinks about tracking you but this isn't an emergency. This is possibly them just being really paranoid. It's been a few hours and it's just getting more and more tempting. Jason decides that if he doesn't hear anything from either you or Molly by the end of patrol tonight, he'll track you. You don't normally miss patrol according to Molly which means if you miss tonight, that's reason enough for an emergency.

It gets closer and closer to the time Jason normally starts patrolling and he's yet to find you. To say he's starting to worry would be an understatement. But, then, he hears yelling coming from an alley nearby. And he swears the yelling sounds like it's coming from you. Jason jumps to the next roof to get a look into the alley only to finally find you. But, there's a man, maybe two hundred pounds, over six feet just towering over you, screaming. Jason's blood boils as he uses his grabbling hook to quietly get himself down.

"Do you have any idea who you're fucking with, kid?" The man yells.

You let out a crackle. "Do you?" You quip back, blinking up at him.

The man pulls back his fist just as he feels metal pressing the back of his head. "Touch her and I'll blow your brains out." Jason's voice is disguised through the modulator.

The man opens his fist, surrendering his hands. He lets out a laugh. "The Red Hood."

Jason pushes the gun further into his man's head, causing him to look down.

"I got it, Red." You say with the roll of your eyes.

"Looked like it." Jason quips with sarcasm. "Get the fuck out of here before I change my mind." Jason yanks the man by the collar of his shirt, tossing him backwards.

He doesn't look scared as he looks up to Jason, fully covered in the Red Hood gear. Instead, he just calmly gets up, taking a long stare at the two of you before he walks casually down the alley. Jason and you both find it a bit odd but it's Gotham so you both brush it off.

"What are you doing?" Jason asks, glad you can't hear the worry in his voice.

"What are you doing?" You ask back, avoiding the question.

"Asked you first." Jason fires back with a single nod of his head.

"Walking?" You quip back.

"With him?!"

"What?" You scoff. "Ew, no. He fucking cornered me." You roll your eyes in disgust. "Your turn."

No part of Jason believes you for a second. Jason is starting to think Molly is valid in her concern because not only do you not lie to him but you also wouldn't shut off your phone just for walking. Jason is starting to worry he might be the one having to talk you off of a ledge.

"Molly was worried." Jason confesses.

"She sent you?!" You seeth as your blood starts to boil.

Living with Molly was supposed to be convenient for the both of you. It's cheaper and safer, it's supposed to be fun. Involving Molly was supposed to be a way to keep her close and safe rather than her going off on her own. But, you're standing here feeling betrayed and you're questioning if any of it was the right decision. She sent Jason because Jason is actually good at locating people who don't want to be found and Molly knows you aren't going to chew out Jason for it. The whole thing makes you that much more annoyed.

"She was worried. I didn't track you or anything, I told her you were probably fine, alright?" Jason tries to ease your annoyance. He'd be annoyed, too if it were him.

"I can handle myself." You snip as you cross your arms.

"I know." Jason shrugs. "Look, whatever the hell you're up to, you don't have to do it alone." Jason tries to offer some sort of reason, hoping you'll give him some clue to what you've actually been doing.

You want to be mad but you don't blame Jason. If it were him, you'd be doing the same thing. "Just...I'm okay, alright? Thank you for checking and dealing with him. I'm fine though."

"You sure? She sounded pretty worried." Jason shifts his weight to his left leg.

"I think she's talking to Gar." You blurt, partially to deflect and partially because you do think that has something to do with it.

Jason shakes his head quickly, his brows furrow under the helmet. Molly and Gar? "Like....talking?"

"Yeah!" You yell.

"When the fuck did that happen?"

"I don't know." You shrug your shoulders. "But you know, he's got that whole Red thing going on with the visions and stuff. And now the Brother Blood shit, I think she's worried about him and her worry is spilling over."

Jason nods his head, not buying it. This is one of those deflective tactics you love to do when you don't want to talk. "Bullshit."

"What?"

"She has a reason to be worried but you don't want us to know." Jason states.

"No. I think that's it." You shrug your shoulders and it's not a full lie. You do actually think that's why Molly is being so paranoid, even if she should be.

"Look, just be careful, alright?" Jason asks, knowing he's not going to get any real answer from you right now. He figures he'll try again later when you're in a better mood, when you haven't been completely blindsided.

"I will." You nod your head softly.

Jason shakes his head, not feeling any bit of his worry ease. "Hey, you wanna patrol tonight?" Jason asks. "Together?"

"Really?" You ask as your eyes soften with the request, even if you don't think it's a coincidence he's asking when he's worried.

"I mean your nagging is fucking annoying but you're alright company." Jason shrugs one shoulder.

"Fuck you."

"Maybe after." Jason quips back.

You let out a laugh. "Alright, fine, you've sold me." You roll your eyes. "I've got my case hidden at the usual place."

"Course you." Jason chuckles. "Bike there, too?"

"It is." You nod your head.

"Come on." Jason jerks his head down the alley. "Mine's a block away, I'll take you."

"Thank you, Red." You beam up to him.

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[addledmongoose]

Good Omens Fanfic Friday (21 Jun 2024)

I started off the week with some funny ones, then ended the week with a binge of snae_b stories.

post-professional endeavors (9K; Rated T) by @forineffablereasons

Three outsider POVs from a real estate agent, a contractor, and an interior designer as they help two very strange man-shaped beings buy and furnish a lovely South Downs home. I love stories where others have to deal with our two Ineffables. And they are definitely dealing with them. I think the real estate agent lived with a permanent headache for two months.

***

A Special Place In Hell (50K; Rated T) by @mirach and @hotcrosspigeon

Sometimes you stumble upon a story you can't believe you hadn't heard of before and has such a unique idea you're immediately entranced.

After Adam shifted reality, Satan disappeared, and the title of King of Hell was given to the nearest immortal. Which happens to be a certain angel.

This is the story of Aziraphale becoming the new King of Hell (while still being an angel). There are plenty of light and amusing moments in this story, but you'll find yourself cheering him on as he works to gain the loyalty of Hell's demonic forces.

I wish this was part of a series, because I could definitely read more.

***

For Loving One (64K; Rated E) by @thescholarlystrumpet

Human AU. Set in 1944 in a small town in England. This one is quiet and angsty as Aziraphale has to overcome his own internal homophobia and religious trauma to find happiness with the parish's new caretaker.

Father Fell has been living a quiet life in a small parish. Despite the looming fear of war, he thought he was content with his small pleasures. Until a mysterious stranger comes to town, turning that life on its head and awakening desires the Father thought he buried long, long ago...

***

Fancy Patter On The Telephone (18K; Rated G) by @hotcrosspigeon

Set during lockdown, this fun and funny story is told completely through dialogue, mostly through phone conversations between the two.

***

Libraries and Love Spells (35K; Rated T) by @silvormoon

Fantasy AU. Here's a recently completed, almost-zero angst love story set in a fictional world of sorcerers and kings that I stumbled upon while searching the "fake marriage" tag. It deserves more kudos than it has, because it's simply lovely.

It's not easy being a capital-G Good King, and Aziraphale is sick of it. All he wants is to hide in his library and read all day. That's why he's arranged with an "evil" sorcerer by the name of Crowley to pretend to be under a love spell so they can get married and Crowley can take over the kingdom. That is, of course, the kind of plan that will definitely not have any complications whatsoever...

***

And everything after this is by snae_b. I've just started a fourth one that will probably be on next week's list. They're fantastic with the plot-heavy, genre human AUs. Edited to add author's tumblr: @snae-b.

Echo (52K; Rated E)

Coffee Shop AU. When I saw this story mentioned here, the person suggested going into it without knowing anything about the plot, and having read it, I have to agree. There's nothing I could really say about this that wouldn't be a spoiler, but I can say it's not simply a coffee shop AU.

***

The Beginning and the End (45K; Rated E)

Post-apocalyptic omegaverse AU. It's the end of the world and neighbors (omega) Aziraphale and (alpha) Crowley can't depend on anyone but themselves as they flee to safety.

***

Lunacy (57K; Rated E)

When I read Echo, I thought, Wow, what a great story. And then I read The Beginning and the End, and I thought, Wow, what a great story. Then I read Lunacy, and I thought, Holy shit, this is one of the best stories I've read this year.

This is a human AU set far in the future. Crowley is the crew chief of a mining operation on Styx, one of Pluto's satellites. Aziraphale is a geologist who is there to monitor the structural integrity of the tiny moon. This story is pure psychological horror. Something strange is happening, and it's a race against the clock to escape before it gets them. My heart was racing nearly every moment.

The quieter moments happen in flashbacks, because they've been on the moon for a year already and were already in a FWB relationship when the story starts. Of course, it being Aziraphale and Crowley, we all know that FWB means they're deeply, madly in love with one another. There's some lovely NSFW art embedded with this story.

[thatdeadaquarius]

"Oh my gosh do you sound like a sim to them??"

Me trying to place myself in their shoes:

"Why the fuck do I sound like a villager in Animal Crossing-- ARE THEY HEARING ANIMALESE WHEN I SPEAK?!"

(A.k.a I saw the previous ask and thought wait a minute. Two different worlds. Languages so similar but so different....... We're basically speaking animalese in another game/world lmfao)

(Bonus: Creator!Reader knows this and takes full advantage as their payback. Traveller magically understands and speaks back causing further pyschic confusion. Pretty sure soke brains have been melted among linguistic students in Sumeru)

-Vine Boom

VINE BOOM MY BELOVED IM SO LATE TO ATTEND TO YOU!! :'(

It has been a minute and yet, you remain my love!! Thank you for your patience, have a little scenario as my thanks for that and submitting the cool idea <3

Me @ you: ♥ ( ॢᵕ n ᵕ (꒡ᵋ ꒡ღ) mwah! /p

this gif is just really cute thats why its here.

also i have very little to add so its short but only bc im ✨uncreative✨ atm and ur ask alone is funny enough lmao, so once again, a scenario bc vine booms just a genius all on their own ✨️

◇

😭so you mean 😭 as revenge 😭 for this awful deed 😭 done to your speech 😭 you just start EMBRACING IT 😭😭😭PLEAASEEE-

PLEASE the traveler understands it!! 💀

Also if anyone reads this im so sorry ive flooded the sagau tag with language shenanigans LMAO

◇

Ever since you realized that the entirety of Teyvat sounds like Sims to you, (and the subsequent awful reckoning that you sound the same to them 😭) 

You have finally mentally recovered enough courage, and desperately shoved any embarrassment deep into your soul, to try and think of what to do about it

♤

You quickly found that people had 3 types of reactions to your speech,

 

1. They try to understand the nonsense like you trying to understand their Simlish, it really doesnt work, you wish you could tell them to give up and just gesture at you instead:

(ALHAITHAM he keeps trying then giving up then trying again lol, Diluc, ZHONGLI, Sara, Albedo, Candace, Dehya she thinks she’s gonna get it THIS time she swears-, Eula, Gorou, GANYU she feels bad lmao, Jean, AYAKA, keqing, kuki, Nahida, ningguang, AETHER, Thoma, xinyan, XIAO)

◇

2. They act like you when you hear animal crossing characters speak 💀 you can see the “omg so cute” sparkle in their eyes:

(KAZUHA, kokomi, barbara, KAEYA, ZHONGLI again lol he tries to hide it but you can see the tiny smile everytime you walk over and start ranting at him bc ur bored, Faruzan, GOROU, AYATO, YAE MIKO, keqing, LISA, mika, mona, KLEE literally loves you and you can tell shes always trying to get you to say something lol, Ei (archon), Rosaria she always SMIRKS and ur just- 😳, CHILDE the little shit giggles at ur misery, LUMINE AND AETHER U CANT TRUST EITHER OF THEM- , THOMA, SCARAMOUCHE BUT HE’D NEVER ADMIT IT BUT HE ALWAYS IS OBVIOUSLY TRYING TO HIDE A TINY SMILE AND GOES A LITTLE PINK-!! SAME FOR XIAO LMAO)

◇

3. You know that tiktok audio thats like Isabella from Animal Crossing singing, and then someone’s like “uh-huh! YEAH! OKAY!!” yeah like that, but to you LMAO

(ITTO, Bennett, KAVEH, heizou, VENTI, Nilou she like nods after everything you say and makes sure you’re treated well in every conversation aw, qiqi, KLEE, Raiden (puppet) + Ei (archon), SHENHE no explanation needed, CYNO too, LUMINE, YELAN, yoimiya, yunjin)

♧

Alright i got tired sorry not everybody’s there lol^

So no matter the reaction, they all are a little bummed nobody can get you, 

…but then of. Fucking. Course. 

LUMINE/AETHER as ALWAYS get SPECIAL TREATMENT 

(there’s not a single person throughout all the nations, the archons, the allogenes, doesnt matter, who hasn’t felt a LITTLE pang of envy for this- bc as cute as you sound, goddamit they USED to understand you when you weren’t physically here, before you overcame the Universal Barrier AKA the computer screen lol)

AND THEY GET TO UNDERSTAND YOU.

The Sumeru linguistics department is grinding their teeth, Alhaitham straight up glares every time they translate for you lmao, Zhongli’s eye twitches at least once everytime they do so, Kazuha is literally trying to bribe them with cool places he’s seen that the traveler hasn’t so they’ll share the secret of how to understand you, Ningguang gets 10x chillier when they’re helping convos w/ you, Ei looks like she’s fucking pouting-

☆

Aether is just like 🤨?? For what?? I’m helping???

So confused he never gets what’s going on lol

✨

Lumine, on the other hand, is FULLY aware and smirks every time she’s so smug about it LMAO 

^ the embodiment of the cat surrounded by knives meme ^

☆

Ahhhh my exhibition is April 6th u guys!

May I finally rest in peace when that day comes 🪦

Cant wait to graduate and just have a regular job and not academia + deadlines 😭😫

Hope you guys have had a nice week or two!

Look out for more posts after the 6th :>

Safe Travels,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

Short one but hope its fun my beloved!! :)

[lace-coffin]

Hi im that person that asked for the stufed toy thing and oh my god i loved it so much i loved everything and onece your requests are open sorry im asking while they are shut i had this sudden idea for a request sorry😭😭 ive also kinda got 2 ideas soooo sorry😅

But like a reader that is obsessed with drawing and loved to draw cute and sweet drawings to give to asa to do with their hyper fixation or every time they are with him they start ranting to him about it or them i dont know but he would be so educated on their hyper fixation unless its bugs then he would already know everything haha

Or idea 2

The reader likes to lick things randomly for no particular reason they just like to do it or they love physical touch and cant get enough of it always cuddling with asa at night as close as they can and just imagine them cuddling and they just lick him then he just gets confused that would be so funny to imagine😭😭

Or the reader for the same type of thing as the plushie one but instead music to calm them down and they would have like a tiny crying fit for their headphones bc i have had alot of meltdowns over not having my headphones its crazy i love your writing so much hope u have a good day❤️

Asa Emory x Autistic!Gn!Reader with a new hyperfixation

Requests are open!

Hi I hope you like this! I totally crammed my last two fixations into this < 3

Call Asa old but he wasn’t exactly up to date on video games. He defiantly was now at least, not that he had much choice. You were always flipping between interests, intensely talking and interacting with one topic for weeks or months at a time and then switching to another that catches your interest. It’s been Sonic The Hedgehog for atleast 3 weeks now.

He didn’t exactly picture his desk to be filled with pictures of anthropomorphic hedgehogs but here he is, he kinda signed up for this when he stuffed you into the trunk, knowingly or not. As long as you’re happy then he’s happy, even if he thinks you’re spending a little too much time on that GameCube you begged him to bring to hotel..

A few weeks pass and it’s now the Saw franchise. Victims being “tested” in disgusting gory traps by a man that fancies himself to be god? This is more up to his speed..pun unintended.

A series of excited knocks sound from the door of your masters workroom. Stretching his taught shoulders and neck he takes inventory of his aching muscles, he supposes he can take a break to spend some time with his puppy. Slumping back in the chair and swinging it to face to door Asa calls you in. “Enter”

Keeping your eyes pinned to the floor until given further permission you enter the room, shuffling over to drop to your knees in front of your owner, waiting for the order. The currently unmasked man drinks in your appearance, oversized jumper falling to sit on your neatly pressed together thighs and the collar he places on you every morning slightly twisted, the tag not where it should be.

“Eyes up pet” he says firmly, snapping his fingers to emphasise the point. Jumping a little at the suddenness you snap your eyes up to meet a fond look on master’s face, you relax a little, letting out a sigh.

Shuffling to prop his chin up with his fist in interest, Asa continues.

“What can I do for you pet?”

Visibly perking up and practically vibrating on the wooden floor you push the paper into Asa’s face, defiantly too close, there’s no way he can actually see it like that. Realising this you settle to put it in his lap and stare back at him hopefully.

“I drew more pictures! I wanted you to see..” you reply a little shy, suddenly realising how loud and excitable you had been, insecurity creeping in. Asa recognises you shrinking in on yourself and tuts. “Can I see, cricket?” He adds softly, prompting you to show him what you’ve been working on, he never wants you to feel ashamed about you’re passions even if you’ve been taught in the past to ‘tone it down’

Asa wants all of you, he accepted that from the moment he hoisted you into the box, to the moments when he firmly settles the collar around your throat every morning.

Soft smile settling onto your face you hand over the paper, not ignoring the way your knuckles brush against your masters during the exchange.

You wait with baited breath as he looks the paper over, you know he would never say anything demeaning about your art but you can’t help feel a little anxiety when letting someone in on something special to you. Todays drawing is a rough sketch of your for a saw trap, it’s grisly and frankly disgusting, you don’t envy anyone that would end up strapped down and desperate on the other end of it. Obviously you have no need for a contraption like that, but it’s only an (admittedly) sick fantasy.

After flicking through the diagrams and reading the notes as best he can (it’s not your fault he can’t read you’re handwriting well 🙄) a strange look crosses his face..it’s almost like you can see the cogs working in his brain. this could either be fantastic or a disaster, Asa isn’t one to do things half assed, it’s always all or nothing.

“Can I use this?” The silence is suddenly broken, his sclera eyes raising to meet your own, not any less eerie than when hidden behind his mask.

A strange feeling begins to pool in your stomach, should you feel exited? Proud that he wants to use your plans? Or disgusted? Sick to your stomach that the plans you never envisioned actually coming to fruition will be used to torture some poor individual? Unsure how to feel or respond you stare back at him, lips slightly parted as if trying to muster something up.

“These are wonderful cricket, they may need a little tinkering to make them functional but regardless this design is…fascinating.” A sickly sweet smile sits on your masters lips as he hands the paper back to you, ruffling your hair and placing a chaste kiss to the crown of your head.

Stunned and with a pit in your stomach you nod dumbly, leaning into the affection and practically purring. The idea that you’ve just essentially sentenced someone to their painful and unethical demise is soul crushing…but also a little thrilling? Has your owner really rubbed off on you this much? It’s not like you don’t know what he does day in and day out but it’s never been this..personal.

Asa slaps his knees (like the old man he is) and rolls back over to the desk, pushing away his current projects and random hardware to make room for your (his) new trap.

“Can you bring me the paper please, doll?. I would like to get started as soon as possible.”

Shaking off the ever building dread you pull yourself up, a little unsteady due to the burning in your thighs from sitting in one position so long. Placing the paper on his desk you stare back at him, waiting for further instruction. you’re not sure when he ended up ingraining that response into your mind but at this point it’s not worth questioning, it’s not hard to see that the pair of you are living in your own little world outside of normal society by now.

“You’re welcome to either sit by me as I work and give input considering it’s you’re design or you may sit on your bed and wait for me to finish”

You glance over at the cushy pet bed across the room from Asa’s desk…a lay down does sound ideal right now, maybe a nap will help clear your head? Or swallow the guilt.

“I’m gonna lay down sir, maybe nap a little, promise I won’t snore and distract you” you tease, giggling and feeling a little better in yourself.

Asa huffs out a chuckle at your joke. “I’ll be sure you don’t little bug.” He says, smiling gently at you. You turn to leave before being stopped in your tracks.

“One more thing, pet”

Cool gloved hands slide around your neck making you shiver at the contact, the small misplaced silver tag is slid back into its original place, proudly stating your name and owner on the front like a brand.

“There we go, much better”

Blushing a little you thank your owner and wonder off to the dog bed, curling up and lazily watching him work from afar.

[catofoldstones]

The thing about arya fans' argument that arya comes before sansa in the line of succession because robb disinherited her because of her forced marriage is the underlying misogyny and victim blaming of it, and their assumption that grrm thinks the same. We don't have jon [you know the actual person robb chose over sansa, and i think its time we start talking that the will specifically was about sansa and jon and that shit means something narratively] asserting that winterfell belongs to sansa despite everything and him not falling to the bait of stannis calling her a lannister, to just assume that according to grrm what robb did was OK. If people actually think grrm wants to show robb was right and girls truly are not important and thus his disinheritance of his sister's rights will be upheld, then they need their heads checked. Its not like he showed us that jaehaerys's sexism was what led to death of the dragons and downfall of targaryens even though grrm considers him a good ruler. Ultimately, catelyn will be validated when brienne saves either sansa or arya with oathkeeper and sansa will become lady of winterfell/qitn DESPITE robb's will. He [and arya fans] can suck it.

Hi soulmate anon,

Before we start, I have to let you know that one our previous posts was screenshotted and circulated in the arya stans circles because “we’re spreading our agenda on a neutral public platform” or something along those lines. Idk if you’ve seen that or not but I had to let you know before we go off kicking another hornet’s nest lol.

Anyway, that out of the way, to the Arya stans who are so hellbent upon removing Sansa from the Stark succession, Robb declared Jon as his heir, pushing Sansa further down the line (not disinheriting her jesus fuck) because through her Tyrion may lay claim to Winterfell, landing it in the hands of the Lannisters, exactly what Robb and Cat are trying to prevent. Robb didn’t “disinherit” Arya because he thought she was dead. Hope that helps.

WAIT!

the will being specifically about Jon and Sansa and that we need to start thinking about that narratively

SCREAM

Okay, I have now moved on (I have not). Though please feel free to talk about this more, I wanna know more. Guess I’ll now have to add jonsa tag to this answer hehe :P

I mean Robb did come from a place of “authority over the female members of his family” here with the will and that’s exactly the kind of thing we have to side eye. Taking it at face value and uncritically thinking about it is not a fair way to engage with the text I feel. You’re right when Jon himself reiterates Sansa’s claim over Winterfell, we are supposed to think twice whether Robb’s action was equitable or not. Stannis calls Sansa “Lady Lannister” to coax Jon into staking a claim over Winterfell so that Stannis gets a good reason to march to Winterfell and attack the Boltons (which he will anyway, but Jon’s, a member of the Stark family, support would mean political backing and reason). If we fall in the trap that Stannis thinks Sansa is now a Lannister, and therefore she is now a Lannister with no claim to Winterfell, then we’ve lost the plot and are coming from the same misogynistic hypocrisy (he wants Shireen on the throne if he dies but calls Sansa a Lannister, how does that work old man?) that destroys Westeros (your Jaehaerys example). And are no different from a crusty medieval era middle aged man btw.

It’s so fucking funny when the readers start emulating the same sexism that the author wants them to critique, and then start calling themselves feminists because they’re supporting a woman’s rights! Which woman’s rights besties? Because the one that clearly has them, you’re actively against her staking her claim. Wait till they read the books with their eyes open and realise that Arya comes at the end of the heirs to winterfell list, despite Sansa getting “disinherited” lmao. And I love Robb, he’s just a boy trying to do his best, but he truly made mistakes, especially with not listening to Catelyn. We also cannot deny the undercurrent of misogyny and chauvinism that Robb demonstrated with the will. Re Sansa’s rights and Jon’s decision to be with the Nights Watch. I will patiently wait for Catelyn to be validated and Sansa to be the Lady/QiTN not only because that subverts reader’s expectations and Westerosi patriarchal standards but because I want to see Sansa antis have a grand old meltdown.

[whoishotteranimepolls]

Poll analysis part 4

I normally don't do these so soon, but since I started doing the duo and the trio polls that really brought out some interesting trends

Naruto, I know I've called you guy my problem child fandom just because of how you engage with me. But you guys can't seem to catch a break unless it's Kakashi or Madara. You think one of the most popular animes of all time would at least be able to win something. But no. You're coming in dead last in the Battle Royals. Even just the regular polls with your characters have extremely low engagement. With the only exception being Kakashi or Madara. I have my theories on why this might be happening but I want to observe some more because there are so many more Naruto Polls in the queue before I put anything in writing publicly

Sailor Moon oh boy, did you guys come out to support your lesbians. I was not expecting so much support for those characters, I think I threw them in as a last minute I need an all girl Duo and you guys turned out. I'm curious to see if this continues with all the Sailor Moon characters

Samurai Champloo these characters get mentioned so many times in the comments. Like where are these characters why aren't they in the swordsmen or trio Battle Royale and no one shows up to support them. Why is this? I know Samurai Champloo is iconic but you all are pulling an Attack on Titan. I think the fandom is comatose and the characters only get mentioned out of respect for its iconic status

JoJo's apparently has characters that are trying to give Senshi a run for his money when it comes to panty shots or booty shots. Those polls have been funny. I'll give you that. And it somehow feels appropriate for the JoJo's fandom to do everything for the meme and submit those polls with those specific photos

Berserk you guys only show up to support Griffith and Casca. There is very little love for Guts that might be due to his opponents most the time, but I think that is somehow thematically appropriate

Fullmetal Alchemist I thought you guys only showed up for general Armstrong when I paired up Hawkeye and Mustang as a Duo. You all show up in droves to show your support.

Castlevania You guys show up pretty consistently no matter the character, it's been entertaining because you all can put some interesting things in the tags

One Piece is trying to submit the most obscure characters in that show and then put the most ridiculous tags on it so I have to add them to that already ridiculously long post. At least that's what it feels like because it feels very deliberate.

Cowboy Bebop you exist and your characters are hot. They're even hotter together. That's all I can really say

Bleach You exist. Your characters are mostly hot and Yoruichi is top tier waifu that sweeps in basically every poll she's in

Well that's all for this update There again will be another one. Don't know when but there will be one

[soapyghost]

EMBERS

Firefighter John Price x Fem! Reader

I constantly have Price brain rot so like have my horny thoughts. Hear me out- firefighter price. EH? EHHHH?? Ok fuck you im doing it :) Anyways- this is dedicated to my local fire department cuz they are FINE AF (i see yall at the grocery store how u doin)

So I’m planning on making this a series. A lil slow burn. Idk how many parts. Enjoy the ride. Lmk if you want to be put on the tag list.

Warnings: eventual smut!!! Fluff, fire, mentions of injuries, angst kinda? Use of Y/N. Let me know if I missed anything.

Tag list- @southernbluebellereader (thank you so much for letting me vent about this work ily)

Funny how the worst night of your life would lead you to the best night of your life. Waking up the the blaring sounds of an alarm, you roll over and blindly grab your phone. It couldn't be 7am already can it? You tap on the screen to reveal it's only 2:47am and that sound was not your alarm. It takes you a moment to realize the ear shattering sound is coming from the fire alarm in your kitchen.

Without thinking you fling yourself out of the embrace of the covers only to be met with thick, choking, black smoke. Sputtering you being to cough and eyes filling with tears as you drop to the ground. Crawling to the door on all fours you slowly make your way across the hard vinyl flooring. Again, you mindlessly grab the door handle only to immediately fall backwards onto your back at the searing pain now flowing through your hand. A scream escapes your mouth as you look down, and even in the dark of the room you can see the charred flesh of your hand.

This is it, you think, swallowing hard. This is how you go. Scared and alone in your shitty one bedroom apartment in the same shitty town you were born. They're going to find your body on the morning news, charred and nearly unrecognizable, wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt and panties. You let out a sob as the tears begin to fall from your eyes, mixing with the soot in the air. The burning only adds to your hysteria. Curling up into the fetal position and rocking back and forth you wait for your end.

Suddenly the door to your bedroom is smashed open, wood chips flying everywhere. You scream again and fling your eyes open. Before you stands a giant, a monster. You let out another scream and begin shuffling backwards to the corner of the room. The large creature begins moving towards you and scoops you up like you were nothing. You'd come to terms with dying and becoming a crisp but not dying to a shadow. Squirming you try to get out of the iron clad grasp holding you bridal style. "I got one, she's alive" a voice comes from the monster. Its not until you're out in the hallway that you finally notice, its not a creature, not a monster, but a man.

Piercing blue eyes look down at you from the inside of a yellow hood, crinkling into a small smile. "It's going to be ok, shhh" the thick British voice says, muffled by the gas mask protecting his face. Gulping and holding back tears, you simply nod before putting your face into his chest.

Cold air hits your thighs as you breach the exit of the apartment complex. A gasp escapes your throat and goosebumps immediately cover your body. A small chuckle escapes the figure holding you. He sets you down on the grass, far out of the reach of the fire engulfing your home. You open your eyes to look upon your savior as he kneels down to remove his mask. When he does, the world seems to move in slow motion like one of those stupid commercials.

He's simply breathtaking, from his perfect blue eyes to the well groomed beard that graces his face. "You alrigh' luv?" he asks, reaching out a gloved hand to your shoulder. His voice shakes you out of your daze, back to the harsh reality that you are half naked on the grass outside the crumbling building you used to live in.

It's such a simple question, but after everything you've just been through, it hits like a ton of bricks and tears begin to well up in your eyes again. "Thank you" you hiccup out between sobs, holding tightly onto the hand on your shoulder. He grabs you and brings you into a tight embrace. The world stops, there's no more yelling, no more burning buildings, no more sirens. Its just you and him.

"Cap? You good?" a voice breaks through your fantasy, and you whip your head around to see yet another beautiful man. This one sporting a mohawk and beautiful hazel eyes. "All good here Soap, go." your savior commands. "Soap?" you croak, a huff of a laugh escaping you. Looking back to the man holding you together, a soft smile crawls upon your lips. "Ha, yeah. Long story. You never answered me luv, you alright?" he asks, pulling away slightly to look you over, suddenly realizing just how exposed you were.

Immediately he takes off his jacket and lays it on you, offering you some small form of coverage. "'M alrigh" you respond, breathless. Truth be told, you were far from alright, but that was all you could muster. The man smiles at you and begins to get up, but before you can think you reach out and pull him back, "please... please don't leave" you whisper. His eyes widen ever so slightly, before he holds you back. "Alrigh' luv I won't leave you, cmon'" he smiles, scooping you back up and taking you to the back of the ambulance.

Setting you down in the back, he readjusts the jacket to cover your lower half before looking back up into your eyes, "Names John" he says. You look up into the eyes of the man who just saved your life, "John" you say, testing out the feeling of his name on your tongue. "That's it luv, don't wear it out now ya 'ear?" he murmurs into your ear before finally untangling himself from you. A small whine escapes your throat at the loss of contact, and a blush rises up your face as you realize that he definitely heard it. He chuckles, "alrigh' love, I need to go back to my team, will you let the paramedics check you out?" he asks, looking deep in your eyes. You swallow thickly and nod, "will you come back?" you whisper, your face growing redder by the second. "Of course, luv" he says before cupping your cheek and smiling. He drops his hand, offering you one last smile before saying, “take good care of her eh Gaz?”. He turns his back and jogs back to the firetruck.

The paramedic begins to check you out, tending to your hand. He’s also good looking; tall, muscular and sporting a baseball cap. You notice he also has a slight accent. As he grabs the gauze to wrap your hand he says, “so you didn’t pay attention in school huh?” The remark catches you off guard and you simply blink in confusion at the man, did he really just ask you that? “You shouldn’t grab metal in a fire” he chuckles, finishing your hand and giving you a pat on the shoulder.

“Guess not huh” you respond sheepishly. Not only were you almost burnt to a crisp but now you’re getting chastised for not remembering elementary school training. “Ah, we all forget things in the moment. You’ll be ight” he smiles, placing his med kit back in the ambulance. You look down at the jacket covering your bare legs, it reads in all caps “PRICE”. John Price.

Johns smiling face rounds the corner just as Gaz finishes cleaning up, “how she lookin’ kid?” he asks, looking at you. “Ah she’ll be ight cap” Gaz responds, taking the unspoken hint to slip away and leave you two alone. You absentmindedly flex your hand, the feeling of the gauze on your hand unfamiliar and coarse.

“You alright sweetheart?” John kneels to be closer to your height, his eyes looking deep into yours. “Much better now. I don’t think I’ll ever forget to not touch metal” you laugh weakly. His laugh surprises you, deep and rich. The wrinkles by his eyes deepen as he laughs.

Now that the immediate threat of dying was over, you began to notice just how attractive John was. His muscles rippling underneath the tight long sleeve made your head spin. Or maybe it was the smoke inhalation. You could make out the salt and pepper greys in his beard and hair. And to top it all off, his beautiful blue eyes. You could get lost in them, you were lost in them.

A hand waves itself infront of your face and snaps you back to reality. You’d been caught and you blushed feverishly. “Luv?” John asked, “I asked ya a question.” “Oh ah uh. Sorry. Adrenaline” you answer, eyes darting to the concrete below, trying desperately to hide your face. “I asked if you got somewhere to stay?” He questions again. “Oh. Uhm. Yeah I can get a hotel.” You say, not quite sure how you’ll afford it but you really don’t have any option. “Well then, we’ll take ya” John smiles, holding out his hand.

You grab his hand and move his jacket so it’s resting on your shoulders. He leads you back to the fire truck where the rest of his crew is waiting. “Cap?” A man in a balaclava asks. “Were just taking.. hmm didn’t catch your name luv” John looks over to you. “Oh it’s Y/N” you say, blushing once again. “Beautiful. We’re dropping Y/N off a hotel” John states, recieving nods from his crew.

The ride there is quiet, John driving, the smell of smoke suffocating the cab of the truck. All the men looked exhausted, the one they called soap dozing off. But the man in the balaclava never took his eyes off you, never waivered. You found him odd, his stare unsettling you a bit.

When you finally make it to a hotel Soap wakes and opens the door for you, where John is waiting to help you down. He leads you into the lobby and before you can speak he says “one room for the lady please” to the receptionist. The woman behind the desk smiles and says, “sure thing John” before sliding him a key.

“But wait- I need to pay!” You exclaim. John simply laughs and extends his hand out again to lead you to your room. “No need to worry luv, this is on me” he smiles. You could get lost forever in that smile, would do anything to get to see it. The walk to your room seeming all too short, he drops your hand to unlock the door and holds it open for you.

“Get some rest alright?” He says, looking down at you. All the adrenaline has evaporated from your body and all you can think about is how comfortable that bed looks. You look up to him and whisper, “thank you.” He smiles again, before gesturing you inside. “Sleep well, luv’” he murmurs before closing the door and leaving you in the darkness of the hotel room.

You don’t even remember crawling into bed or even falling asleep. When you wake, you’re comfortably in bed still in John Prices jacket.

[the-brightsong-system]

Me when we're mooties with cool, wonderful people:

AAAAAAAAAA

also sorry for the tag, i just had to show you my appreciation. (Dm us for removal lol)

Cw: very,very long post under the cut

(Dont ask why am i doing this at 2 am. I dont know.)

Our mooties in question:

@the-church-of-strabismus

I had to put you first. You have been our moot for a long time, but you are not just a moot, you are one of our best friends (and our online sibling, ofc!). You are just really wonderful and i hope everything goes right for you, always!!!! (Also i can still offer you our eyes if you want/j). We love uuuu! /p

@cool-username-ig

Did i ever tell you you are amazing? You have been there for us since we joined tiktok, all confused about everything. You were always a funny individual, and a cool one at that (just like your username lol). Stay cool and wonderful, remember we love you!! /p (also rock on, fellow tma fan.)

@gaywitchshowfan

We unfortunatly dont know a lot about you, but what we do know is that you are great, and very interesting! Im glad you finally found your identity, or at least that you feel like this one fits you, for now. You clearly have a good taste at tv shows (judging by your username. I hope im not mistaken when i assume your username is a the owl house reference). Keep rocking on!!

@mygraine

AAAAAA. Would this be a good appreciation post if i wouldnt include the coolest being in the world? I think we screamed out loud when we became moots (Ask seraphim, we were overjoyed in their dms). The flags you make are so good, i wish i could just eat them instead of food. We absolutly adore everything you make!

@somepoetwannabe

Ofcourse, if i make a mooties appreciation post, i have to include this cool system. You guys are awsome!! I will admit i dont know a lot about you, but i know enough to consider you our friend. You are genuinly awsome. I wish you the best!!

@rwuffles

AAA. I know we only recently became mooties, but you are so cool that not including you would have been a stupid thing, really. Your flags are AMAZING, and so are you!! We wish to know you better tbh, lol.

@muttfail

Hey, look who it is! Our online cousin! Really, i also dont know you enough, but your blog theme is really cool. And i know one thing for sure: All your outfits are fire, you look awsome. Keep dressing like the coolest person ever.

Im so SO sorry if i frogot someone, like i said its 2 am and i'll probably add you in the morning.

[thecoffeelorian]

Firstly...yeah, it's been 8 months since I did this last, I know...however, as I knew this story/giant plot bunny is by no means over, naturally, I would have to add a second chapter sooner or later. So...without further delay or excuse-making, I think I finally have it.

Title: Come Little Children

Chapter: 2 of 3

Characters: Omega (The Bad Batch), Mother Talzin (The Clone Wars)

Premise: If every Force-sensitive has an equal chance of becoming Jedi or Sith...then, perhaps, could every dead Force-sensitive have an equal chance of influencing the living...?

Special Notes: I took faint hints from the first two seasons plus an echo or two from 'Tales Of The Empire' to put this all together. Maybe I'll toss Asajj Ventress in here later for some added variety, maybe I won't. Either way, I hope I can still hold everyone's attention, if not also gain a few new readers in the process of continuing this story.

Previous Chapter: ->Click<-

Previous Story: Overwatch

No-Pressure Tag List:

@libraryfordyslexics @virgil-upinthestars @letsunity @sirsqueaks @avalon-knightly

@humbugxx @manninmclir @alons-ycreeper @third-generation-female-warrior @thebookloverscoffehouse

@domino-16 @69gayfrog69 @ci-avmovies14 @angelofthesurf599 @ninilily

@ichigojamjam @freddykicksasses @transitranger327 @flyiingsly @skellymom

@dathomirdumpsterfire @groguandthebadbatch @berkinix @swarovski-yoda @tink1221

@simply92-me @krazykupid @kuraiummei @thedynamicworm @themightychipmunk42

At first, neither one of you dares to speak, let alone move. There seems to be a stalemate between you, at least in this curious red realm, so perhaps it’s only fair that you think your next few moves over as carefully as you’re able.

This is also the very first time that the two of you have ever met, so naturally, you just might have to make sure you don’t end up trying anything that you’ll end up regretting later. Especially not when you have zero ideas of what this stranger is capable of, never mind what she could do to you without thinking twice about it.

Once you see the way she barely moves a hand to try and grab you, though...you're jumping backward without a second thought, the nerves of all your past abduction attempts waking up in a single heartbeat.

“Don’t!” You push as much strength into the word as any other thirteen-year-old can, if only to prove to this stranger that you will not be her next target.

That you are not going to be grabbed by her, taken to any secondary locations by her, or utterly made to disappear from the world because of her.

Time itself has already taught you just how to stay alert, and now that you’re once again in unfamiliar surroundings, you might have to recall these lessons one more time in order to make it out of here safely. To your greater surprise, though—or your shock, maybe, it's not too much of a stretch to consider both—she merely lowers her arm in a sort of amused silence, both acknowledging you and examining you with no more than a single look.

“What—what's so funny? What did I do?”

It's what you HAVEN'T done that interests me. Riddles, you think to yourself, almost with a shudder. I ask questions, and I get nothing but riddles in return...why is that?

“ ‘Haven't done’? What—what do you mean by that?”

Your powers, child. You’re certainly of the right age to start manifesting them, if not everything else.

“My powers…? What would I need powers for?”

Allow me to demonstrate. Do you see those remains before you?

Your shock grows ever so slightly as this arcane being indicates a half-gone skeleton not far from where the two of you stand, the remnants of its bones just barely visible from beneath the red sand.

“Well, yes, but what does that have to do with—” —Hush. Let me show you.

It’s here that this eldritch creature, this woman, smiles the smile more befitting a crocodile or other predator, the same smile you’ve only ever seen on the bounty hunters hired to steal you away—then, without any further hesitation, begins to chant over that skeleton. It's a strange language all right—kind of raspy and sing-song-ish all at once—but barely three seconds into this, something else even stranger happens.

“What. The. Kriff...?!” Without any visible effort, this woman needs only to raise a hand over the skeleton and continue her arcane chants before—Maker help you, this has to be a nightmare—before the bones begin to rise and re­form themselves back into as close a body as they can, all the while enveloped in a haze of bright green light. A body that starts to regain some of its more discernible features, like a full head of wavy black hair and matching arched black eyebrows.

Almost like they're turning into—there's no other word for it—what’s left of a fallen Clone Trooper.

“Who is that? What happened to them?”

The woman has gone annoyingly silent now, and to your greater hesitation to interact further with her, isn’t even smiling this time. Instead, she’s just watching you in almost the same manner that Nala Se used to watch you, like—like you’re a walking, talking experiment again, and she considers herself nothing but an observer of your growth and development.

“Um, didn’t you hear me? What’s going on? Tell me what’s going on!”

Why do you wish to command me, a woman long dead and unreachable from your realm...when it would be so much easier to command those newly gone and still present in your own?

“Command…? What do you mean by that?”

You’ve never really ‘commanded’ anyone in the whole of your young life, truth be told, so it’s nothing short of crazy that such a thing could ever be suggested to you. Moreover, in the worst times of danger, it was more often you being commanded to duck your head, to watch your step, and any other instruction meant to keep you from harm. Why, then, would anything else ever be considered as effective? Don’t you miss him, my dear girl…? The brother you just happened to lose some time before they brought you here, and have mourned ever since? “That’s really none of your—” —Don’t you ever wonder just how much you could punish the ones who took him from you? Your next witty response dies in your throat before you can speak it, and with it, you feel yourself go still from shock. She knows. Your feelings of anger and jealousy have been very faint, indeed—maybe just barely manifesting themselves once or twice, because you’ve never been the type to seek out revenge against others—yet still manifesting just the same, and she knows. So much so that any and all courage you might have had before seems to fade away in a heartbeat, leaving you as little else than one scared girl in dire need of an escape hatch. Ah-h-h, so you have thought about it. Don’t be ashamed. You haven’t been the first girl to feel such things, you know. In fact, I’d say it’s perfectly natural. “But why…?” And yet...this woman, this creature, as frightening as she is...hasn’t exactly attacked you yet. There haven’t been any sudden use of blasters here to stun you, no binders to force your hands together, and certainly no droids about to make sure you don’t try to run away. “Why are you showing me this? What’s this got to do with me…?” In fact, if you didn’t know any better...you’d almost think she wanted you to ask her such questions without any second thoughts. Like she had suddenly become your teacher out of nowhere, and so nudged you into becoming what you hoped was a fairly decent student. Or, at least, that’s the feeling you finally receive after this woman’s latest round of silence: Because, child...I am a Nightsister, and so are you.

[ww2yaoi]

HBO war asks: a,e,f and i

a. make a moodboard/edit/headcanon for who you think is underrated for any of the shows

I think bull is underrated. headcanon that he's a grill master. that guy can cook a mean hot dog

e. what was a character arc in any of the shows that you loved?

I think eugene sledge's arc is probably the best one out of these shows. he changes so much and completely breaks down and loses himself and then rebuilds I think it's the best done arc in all of these shows

f. rank all four shows in order of favorite to least and explain why.

bob > the pacific > gen kill > mota

bob just has the best characters and a cohesive story while the pacific is a bit more disjointed but I also think has a more compelling message, but I have more affection for bob and its characters. then gen kill because it's very well done but I've only seen it once and the marine speak kills me I think I need to see it several more times to fully grasp everything. great characters though, great dialogue, and very relevant to today. mota struggles the most with fleshing out its characters and their arcs and having a specific message. I love the bucks though

i. tag some of your closest mutuals and choose a show portrayal from any of the miniseries' that reminds you of them.

oh gosh I'm kind of quiet and keep to myself because I'm shy and a loser but I'll tag some people whose posts and fan creations I love

@kbsd you give me bucky vibes because you're spunky and creative. your edits are so tapped into the emotions of the characters that I feel like you're very in tune with things around you/connecting with people/embracing that emotionality

@babe-heffron lipton vibes. like I always feel happy and calm when I see you on the dash and I like how you can very easily joke around but you also have interesting observations about the characters and the fandom. like if you like my post and add funny tags to it I feel like I've made a good post 🫡

@pfctipper always love seeing you on the dash because I know there's going to be some interesting history and analysis left in your wake. so nix vibes. you come across as very knowledgeable and intelligent but you're also witty and I love your observations about bob and specifically dick and nix

@youcalledmebabe my webgott sister in arms you give me web vibes of course because you're creative and you want to learn and know things. but also a bit of babe because I feel like you're a cheerful presence on the dash and you're also just nice

@ifapromise I don't know if this will make sense but harry welsh vibes. just enthusiastic and funny and supportive and you give off the aura of just being a really good friend

sorry for pinging everyone lmao i hope you like your hbowarsonas. thanks for the ask <3

[serenpedac]

OC in 15 - Yael Greene

rules: share 15 or fewer lines of dialogue from an OC, ideally lines that capture the character/personality/vibe of the OC. Bonus points for just using dialogue without other details about the scene, but you're free to include those as well!

Thank you @aztarion, @topaz-carbuncle and @serially-wayhaven for tagging me, I loved reading the ones for your OCs so much! I'm stealing Lucille's idea for adding a link to the fic (if posted) where the quotes are from ^^

“I understand,” she whispers. She turns around before he can see her break down completely. (x) 

“In case you haven’t guessed, and I know you have, you were distracting me. I was thinking that you look very beautiful when you’re concentrating. Very beautiful and very distracting and I would like to—” She shakes her head. “No, one thought.” (x) 

“You know I’ve always wanted a sister?” “Would be fun, yeah? Good thing you have—” Farah falls silent, realisation spreading over her face. “Me. Oh, that’s what you meant, isn’t it?”

“But don’t you see, we shouldn’t have to find them. No one should have been taken in the first place. All they want is me.” (x) 

“Or you could… demonstrate?” She bites her lip, his gaze flickering to her mouth at the movement. “Right now?” (x) 

“Hmm, yes. Yes, you did. But it’s part of what makes it romantic, don’t you think? Being lost in the throes of passion, forgetting about anything else. No thinking, only feeling, feeling…”  (x) 

“I don’t think I need to make any wishes tonight, you know. Not when you’re already here with me.” (x)

“Are you sure there’s still space for me between all the bubbles?” (x) 

“Just like me. And each mark tells a story, some are good and some are bad and some might be sad or funny, but they are all part of its history, you know? In trying to remove that it felt like, like they were telling me everything was fine. That Murphy never. That I wasn’t changed.” (x) 

Do you, can you maybe understand? Just a little? (x)

After a few deep breaths, Yael places her hand on top of Morgan’s. “Thank you. I appreciate it.” With a wavering smile, she adds, “I appreciate you.” (x)

“My car didn’t die, it’s just… ill. Yes, it’s ill.”

“You should go help them. I’ll,” she swallows, “I’ll be fine.”

He breaks the kiss when she shivers against him. “You’re getting cold, darling.” “Are you going to follow that one up with a proposal to warm me up?” (x) 

“You could have escaped,” Nate says, vehemently. “You should have escaped.” Tears of anger and frustration burn hot in Yael’s eyes. “I couldn’t. How was I supposed to just leave you? You were— I thought—”

(Yes, nr 10 is me cheating, but letters are a kind of dialogue, right?) Tagging anyone who wants to do this really, but also: @evilbunnyking, @nat-seal-well, @agentnatesewell, @wayhavenots, @ellstersmash, @fauville, @nsewell, @sustainably-du-mortain, @lykegenia, @lukas-du-mortain