#i mean dad has a lot wrong with him but at least he didnt go on mission to africa like mama thats fucked up

[luffyvace]

Inosuke x black male reader

The last one from the poll!! Yippie!!

I love inosuke he’s so cool 😎

your hair is….very foreign to inosuke

this is Japan so when he sees you in general he’s very confused??

and confused=confrontational (like with giyuu)

so at first there’s a chance y’all beefed (it may have been one-sided)

but to talk specifically about your hair he probably pulls and inspects it a lot

or at least tries I know you don’t let that slide

he’d ask overly blunt questions like

“what happened to your hair, is it fried?!”

your skin is also new to him

the things he be saying is atrocious but he’s genuinely curious

mans also has no social cues

which makes him come off as rude

and even if he did have social cues he’d ignore them, cuz he doesn’t care 🤷‍♀️

to sum it all up, don’t take it personally

he be munching down on your cooking tho!

so at least that 🤦‍♀️

he always asks for so much / extras

he likes spicy too

He steals tanjiro and zenitsu’s food whenever you cook

When you use AAVE he doesn’t get it

and never will

you never even bothered to teach him

he doesn’t seem like the type of guy who would get it

if you wanna say something and don’t want him to know just teach tanjiro and zenitsu AAVE

zenitsu will get it before tanjiro does-

”WHAT?? WHADDYA SAYIN?? STOP SPEAKING FUNNY!!”

”THAT DOESNT EVEN MAKE ANY SENSE IDIOT!!”

him calling you a idiot is irony I know 😂 /j

your culture/dances also don’t make sense to him..😞🙁

he might get the culture a little bit more than the dances

i mean it’s just dancing but he’ll be wondering why you have to do it a certain way

and as far as culture he’ll be like

”whaddya doin all this stuff for?! ITS POINTLESS!! lets go train instead!”

Tanjiro will get it tho!

he’ll explain his dad used to do a fire dance to ward the demons off

”is it something like that?”

close enough..🧍‍♀️

your bonnet/durag is very strange to him

He doesn’t get why you need something on your head to sleep

You explain to him that it’s to keep your pillow from soaking the oil in your hair and to keep your hairstyles neat

speaking of which when you braid your hair or if you have locs he thinks it’s very cool!

(that’s like the most positive thing I’ve wrote so far..)

Only problem is…..he wants you to do his hair like yours..

”but inosuke, your hair’s gonna fall out! And you can’t loc straight hair!”

He doesn’t wanna hear it..

he gets loud/starts yelling and you have to calm him down

your features are something he notices right off the bat but at the same time it goes right over his head

like he sees you may have a big nose/big lips but he doesn’t really pay much attention to it

like he doesn’t even think ‘everyone is different!’ so why would he pay attention to everyone’s individual features?

he’s looking for if your strong or not if anything 🤷‍♀️

im just gonna put a collage of his questions here cuz I can

”WHY CANT YOU DO MY HAIR LIKE YOURS?!”

”HOW’S YOUR HAIR SO BIG!?”

”HOW COME YOUR HAIR GOES BOING AND MINE DOESNT?!”

”what’s that black thing on your head?” (Durag)

”WHADDYA MEAN MY HAIRS’ GONNA FALL OUT?! YOURS DIDNT!!”

”is your hair a defense technique?? What does it do?”

“how’d you get your hair like that?”

”WHY DO YOU TALK LIKE THAT??”

”I CANT UNDERSTAND YOU!! SPEAK NORMAL!!”

”does your whole village look like that?? SHOW ME!”

his bluntness be getting outta hand ngl

You being a male doesn’t NOT affect inosuke whatsoever

he realized he wanted to be with you, and his mind, you were already his

(he didn’t actually ask you out 🤦‍♀️)

and yeah I pretty much have nothing else to say bc inosuke don’t care.

he’s him like that 🤷‍♀️

Inosuke’s love languages are quality time and gift giving

quality time = training

training = beating

not because he wants to beat you

but just because he doesn’t hold back at all

i hope your stronger than him

cuz if your weak……..😃

with gift giving he’ll remember the things you say you like but……it’ll just end up going..wrong..

for example! You say you need a new durag because it has a hole?

well! The great inosuke has taken the liberty to make you a new one!

like it? 😁

(oh gosh…..you don’t. What is this even made out of??)

”gee thanks..! Inosuke..”😟

”HHAHAHAHAHAH YOU BETTER BE GRATEFUL!! THE GOD OF MOUNTAINS HIMSELF MADE YOU A NEW DURAT!”😼

(yes durat 😋..he doesn’t remember the name)

zenitsu and tanjiro support you two

zenitsu was already aware of non het couples

he doesn’t see the attraction but it’s none of his business to him really

tanjiro is 100% supportive and doesn’t see it any different from a hetero couple

kind confused?? But he’s supportive :)

also commends you for taking on the rambunctious inosuke 😅

inosuke doesn’t care what anyone else has to say about your relationship

Now if they’re passive aggressive he won’t get it-

but if they directly insult either of you—your gonna have to stop him from beating them up 😜

(or join him! 😊)

all in all….your relationship is very chaotic!

you love him regardless <3

Lol inosuke so silly

Hope you enjoyed💝

[fictionfixations]

book 7 part 4 spoilers

im having intrusive thoughts (theyre UNWELCOME. ive been hit by so many emotions i cant stop myself from actually crying rn ) now that i finished it okay so

if there are any typos or wrong words that dont make sense im SO sorry i usually sleep around this time (i wrote confused instead of convinced im SOBBING) so my brain is slowing down on me

whbat if. what if if

we encounter the dawn knight

and silver's ring starts glowing

and they accuse him of being a traitor because it seems weirdly familiar (or the knight accuses silver of being a thief? IDK)

LISTEN im still convinced that the dawn knight and silver are connected in some way. i just dont know how yet. aghhhhh

ALSO WHEN is the conversation about them mentioning 'hey you keep calling me father..' (could be brushed off as 'you remind me a lot of my father'. cue probably mixed feelings) or '..hey what was that about you calling yourself a zigvolt when we first met?'

i mean sharing LAST NAMES (edit: i said nicknames wtf? im so sorry) without being related is normal. although i dont know how normal it is in twisted wonderland.

ALSO sebek also like doubled down like

baur: you dont have the signature scales

sebek: my mother has them!

baur: then why dont you?

sebek: ... (ashamed of his father. ashamed of his blood. poor baby. he really just ended up taking being called a 'human /neg'. to be fair i dont want to know reactions to a half-fae, because that would mean during the war between fae and humans, a fae got together with a human. and we know that that relationship was looked down upon even now in the future where the war is over, i think.)

(this book made me such a sebek apologist 😭)

like COME ON dont brush it off. i mean im going to cry for that conversation because its just going to be PAIN but like CMONNN????

where are the consequences?

then again this isnt real its just. a dream.

but...

also what if the dawn knight is silvers dad and lilia fucking idk kidnapped him and it started the war [although he'd be way too young in that case since this is 400 YEARS in the past] (but then theres the note lilia read him which means silver probably did get abandoned. .......or maybe lilia killed the dawn knight and his last words were giving his son over and that note about not wanting silver's eyes to cloud over in sorrow, and to instead be as clear as the jewel on the ring...)

or or or or

AHHH

i have. so many thoughts.

i STILL believe silver's at least related to the dawn knight. ...im just not sure how but i keep backtracking to son because yes.

and like itd also play into the 'fae stealing children' idea thingy. although i wonder if thats more offensive if that gets mentioned at all. if it was like some sort of propaganda bedtime story that humans told their children to make them terrified of fae and viewing them as monsters or something..

like

cuz

remember that merchant in the port town(?) area thing

first mistook us for monsters because of our masks (but thats fair)

realized we were like fae?? made a racket

this guard came over and the merchant accused US of threatening the guy to hand over his shit like what??? WE DIDNT DO ANYTHING WHAT ARE YOU ON ABOUT?? we dont even want your fucking spices or whatever wtf ???

i am also a believer that there's a huge misunderstanding between the fae and humans that caused this war.

but also.

i know twisted wonderland is very tragic and everything

but if the dawn knight and the ironclads kill malleus' mom im going to hate them so much. more than i already do [well i hate the ironclads, not the dawn knight, since one bad apple doesnt make them all bad apples]. (look they probably killed raverne but..... malleus' parents man. one is better then none. :( )

god

imagine though that the dawn knight is silvers dad (in whatever twisted time loophole age gap thing whatever the fuck even if it doesnt make sense)

and the dawn knights kills maleanor . . .? i. cant remember (OKAY maleanor is malleus' mom.? and maleficia is like grandma. i think... i. bro the overuse of mal is confusing me so bad sob)

just. imagine silver spiraling into a sort of self-hate. like. im the child of your enemy. my dad ("your dad is LILIA." says someone) killed malleus' parents...

and it probably feels worse then. idk. being a human in a land of fae. like so much more out of place

and so horrible

ahh im worried

..then again maleanor (i almost said maleficia oops) is super strong right? so she'd probably win.. (but also. its a lot harder to fight with something to protect. that being your precious little eggwhich you would probably die for to keep safe) ALSO SHE DIED SO LIKE ???

hhh i dont know what to think

JP SPoilers now

also really fucking worried because JP server's all the way in like idk pomefiore and im just like

how did you even get there. whAT? THIS ENDS?

like i know it'd have to end eventually but i just cant see an end in sight...

:((

i hope we can bring lilia with us. but there might be a chance he'll be made to fall into a deeper sleep where we cant assist since the whole point of his overblot was about lilia and wanting to keep him 'alive' and there

so.....

im just. sad.

[cringefailcabitha]

sorry i dont have tumblr (i only use it to stalk cabby art LOL) and idk if youll answer this but i am known as the cabby yapper by my friends so i wanted to bring this up to someone who thinks about her as deeply as me

do you ever like think about how terrifying mephones plan for a season 4 would have been to cabby specifically? out of all of the final 3 she has been hurt by the game the most (with no closure mind you unlike balloon), i think having to go through everything again would genuinely break her. even if shes less misunderstood the game still puts pressure onto her to be a facts machine, a strategist. when shes literally the kindest person ever, trying to comfort silver (despite his constant mistreatment of her), and sacrificing almost every post merge challenge for the sake of somebody else (i.e giving up her inani-mate for yinyang, sacrificing herself in episode 13 to put herself on the line with yinyang even if she was manipulating them out of obligation, AND EPISODE 15 SHE DEFINITELY WOULD HAVE WON IF SHE HAD USED HER FILES and completely foiling blueberrys plan, but she didnt because she cared about bot)

in the episode when shes reading the file, the screen actually starts shaking a little. implying she was absolutely horrified at what she was reading. and she had every single right, especially considering what shes gone through.

the other thing that’s absolutely insane to me is the fact that this information was conveyed to her via a file. aka her disability aid, something she relies on. that mustve been horrifying to see something so person to her used against her in such a way.

sorry i regurgitated a lot of this info from the shut i put on tiktok. im just genuinely crazy about cabby

ALSO UR A CABTUBE TRUTHER IM LITERALLY SO IN LOVE WITH CABTUBE i am lesbian cabbys number one truther and see her shipped with men far too much. but like i was so hoping test tube would at least apologize or something. it irritates me how they can make one sided silvercandle canon but they cant show us anymore one-sided cabtube. just make her blush or something. but tbh it made me emo when test tube (and pb bc they nodded) oraised cabby, it made me genuinely crazy.

also unshout out to everyone bullying cabby this episode genuinely why were half of them so mean please let silver Die slowly and painfully. also if lifering (i hc him and cabby as father and daughter, like u cannot convince me lifering and floory arent her dads) switched up on cabby i will personally take his soul like the grim reaper he will be seeing these hands.

sorry feel free to ignore this!

-🍭

😭 I was for real thinking about that earlier today like hasn’t she been through enough… Yes Cabby is a very competitive person but after everything that happened to her in this season and the fact that she’s Still in a vulnerable place right now I don’t think she would find it particularly enjoyable to not receive a prize and then immediately be thrust into a new season of competition— and as a team leader, no less.

Test Tube thanking her for apologising was,,, weird to me. I literally rolled my eyes. It gave me the impression that she (and Paintbrush) think Cabby *should* be apologising to everyone for making some of them uncomfortable? And I just don’t agree. As polite as it is, I think it’s way overstating her actions. Like… why is it “right” to apologise to the entire jury for her past behaviour making “some of them uncomfortable” pre episode 7 when she had never even worked with half of them when said behaviour was supposedly occurring? It’s so frustrating to me, like… how much smaller does she have to make herself for them to be satisfied? I don’t get it.

And of course, “making them uncomfortable” thing again comes back to her files. It’s basically impossible for her not to internalise the idea that keeping information is bad because she Might get things wrong (which. Is another thing. As far as we’ve seen, her writing is almost always correct, barring Bot which is an obvious outlier, and erroneously attributing Suitcase turning on her alliance in season 2 to Balloon’s manipulation.) In episode 15 too, aka the worst Test Tube episode to me, she says Cabby thinks everyone is just “what she happened to write down” as if Cabby is careless and doesn’t do her due diligence when writing her files. Which to me directly contradicts her calling Cabby’s Fan file “impeccable” and having “so many notes” back in episode 2?

And as for Test Tube’s assertion that Cabby would turn on her the moment she stopped being useful, and that she treated everyone like chess pieces on her little board, it really felt like her jumping to conclusions because of what happened with Fan. Because she has done that to no other member of the Pinkers. And there is way less manipulation on Cabby’s part in the show than Test Tube’s irritation would have it seem.

I’m not sure if the writers intentions were to make Cabby as manipulative as Silver from the beginning, but if it was and that’s why this is all going on, well. Mission status isn’t exactly a success to me— the only manipulation she does is in episode 2, when she tries to get Bot to vote out Fan (and presumably the rest of the team as well), and episode 7, where she makes a big show of approaching Silver about how it would be better for him to stack the ice cream because, knowing him to be lazy and careless, it would increase the odds of him screwing up the challenge and make it easier to vote him out.

I’m at least relieved that Test Tube seems to have been thinking about things whenever Cabby says something self-effacing or seems to be nice, because it gives me hope that she may finally realise she’s been taking it too far and maybe Cabby will get an apology, but the fact that she’s been just sitting on it for like 3 episodes by now is killing me,

[thealmightyemprex]

Sci Fi Month Review 7 : Roger Cormans Fantastic Four

For this review…..We're looking at something special,the unreleased Fantastic Four movie

In this 1994 film Scientist Reed Richards(Alex Hyde-White ) and his companions Sue Storm (Rebecca Staab ),Johnny Storm (Jay Underwood ). and Ben Grimm(Michael Bailey Smith) take a space flight to study a comet,but things go wrong and the four find themselves changed with extraordinary powers and in the clutches of the mysterious figure named Doctor Doom (Joseph Culp )

So Marvel is huge now in mainstream American pop culture ……But that wasnt always the case.I'll just be honest people ,I am hesitant looking at pre Blade/X Men/Spider-Man live action Marvel adaptations cause they can be …Rough .I mean theres some gems ,I will always love The Incredible Hulk TV show starring Bill Bixby and even have a soft spot for the subsequent TV movies based on that show …..But then you have the 1990 Captain America movie ,Nick Fury Agent of SHIELD starring David Hasselhoff and of course,Howard the Duck .One that has always fascinated me is this film because in fandom circles for many years it was infamous for being the Marvel movie so bad ,they never released it (Which isnt the case truth is more complicated and capitalistic ,basically the film was a way to maintain rights ),a film you could only find as bootlegs at conventions,seen as a geeky oddity along the same lines as the Star Wars Holiday Special .Now you can find it on youtube (Which is how I watched it ) ,and having watched it……I think this film is kind of underrated and I am sad it did not get a proper release

So I gotta explain myself :As a kid some of my earliest comic memorie were reading the Stan Lee and Jack Kirby run of Fantastic Four ,and my dad had the complete series of the 90's Fantastic Four cartoon ….So the Fantastic Four have a special place for me .From the pathos of the Things plight ( a man trapped in the body of a monster ),to the sci fi adventure,to the romance of Reed and Susan ,to the grand villainy of Doctor Doom(Heck a slew of great villains),to the feeling of family ,the Fantastic Four appealed to me .....And I am kind of grumpy that Fantastic Four lacks a great adaptation that captures the spirit .Now there is no shortage of Fantastic Four adaptations out there.....But most of them,at least for me,are kind of mid ,specifically the film adaptations have left a lot to be desired .The Tim Story duology has the humor and the four leads relatively right ,but drops the ball in that they dont DO much and completely misrepresent the villains ,and 2015's Fant4stic might be the worst comic book movie I have ever seen .However this film ,while not the definitive film version I crave and not really a great movie .....IS the BEST movie version of the Fantastic Four and a fairly decent super hero film I feel

Now there is a lot I could make fun of ,its very flawed,like keep in mind ....This was produced by Roger Corman ,they didnt have much of a budget ,so the visual effects are a bit cheesy and bad(The CG Human Torch looks like he is straight out of Reboot ) but I dunno I find them charming .The only lack of budget thing that bothered me is the dialogue of Doctor Doom.....In that they didnt either have the money to loop him or think to loop him(HAve him record his lines later ) which is a problem cause Doom is clanking about and is wearing a mask that muffles his speech......So I dont know what the main villain is SAYING sometimes (Credit to Joseph Culp who does project very well so I know 75% of his dialogue but that 25 % is annoying ).My main flaws are the romance elements ,from the creepy Reed falling for Susan who he knew as a child to Ben and ALicia being in love despite meeting ONCE(And even that scene is a bit creepy ).We also have a subplot that frustrates me as the film has two villains ,Doctor Doom of course.....But then you have the Jeweler.Now the Jeweler was supposed to be the Mole Man ,a guy who due to his physical appearence has cast aside society to live underground and was actually the fours first villain.....Till Marvel said "NO you have the rights to this select group of character,not the Mole Man " ,so he was reworked into the Jeweler ....And I think they should have cut him out.Now I like the idea of his subplot ,him falling for Alicia and trying to make her his queen ,inviting Ben who has now become the monstrus thing to joing his group and Ian Trigger actually gives a great performance ,being creepy but also having a sense of sadness (He reminds me of what Tim Burton tried to do with the Penguin in Batman Returns ) ,and while the name is changed,its a good adaptation of the Mole Man .........Pity he adds nothing to the film other then causing the accident that makes the four the four and kidnapping Alicia,things that Doctor Doom couldve easilly done .I mean it folks in the grand scheme of things,the Jewler is pointless,he never fights the Fantastic Four and he just kind of runs off before the third act .I like the performance and the plot idea,but it shouldve been reworked or cut

Thaaaatttt said.....I still like the movie.....BEcause of the Fantastic Four movies.....Its the bonly one to get that Fantastic Four feel to me:A fun lighthearted sci fi adventure and thats what I want from Fantastic Four .The Four feel in character,its accurrate to the source material andits the only one to get Doctor Doom right at ALL(Actually keeping that he is the King of Latveria and hinting at doombots ).Yes the film is low budget but it makes that budget work ,heck the comic accurate sewn spandex costumes for the Four are charming to me because in universe the costumes are made by Susan and they legit look like something she could make herself (An issue I have with a lot of superhero movie costumes ment to be handmade ).Doctor Doom looks like he stepped right out of the comics with the green cloak and tunic combo and metal mask /armor ,I love this look for Doom .The Thing looks pretty good too with an animatronic face that brings to mind the old Jack Kirby design and stunt man Carl Ciafalio gives a good physical performance (THoughI do find it amusing that the Thing is SMALLER then his human persona Ben Grimm,played by Michael Bailey Smith ) .No one in the main cast is bad ,alll these actors are giving it their alll .I have already discussed my soft spot for Ian Trigger as the Jewler, Rebecca Staab is a good Susan ,and Jay Underwood is a suitable Johnny .Michael Bailey Smith is a good Ben Grimm and he also does a decent job voicing the Thing and bringing the appropriate pathos (Though I do wish he had the Things signature Brooklyn accent ).Alex Hyde White might be my favorite Reed Ritchards really selling both the scientist and the leader aspect .Biggest props have to go Joseph Culp,who delivers a great performance despite being in a vfery uncomfortable costume with a mask that muffles his speech,and is able to project well ,make grand gestures (Inspired by real tyrants like Mussolini ) but also make him a fun eloquent villain who still has a sense of humor with a good hero villain dynamic with Reed .Also he is CONSTANTLY evil laughing ,and I dig it

I like this movie ,there is clearly a lot of heart in this movie .....Which makes me sad that the film was mistreated by those at the top.Its not a lost masterpiece ,but it is an highly entertaining B movie that pays tribute to its source material

@ariel-seagull-wings @filmcityworld1 @the-blue-fairie @amalthea9 @goodanswerfoxmonster @themousefromfantasyland @angelixgutz @princesssarisa @theancientvaleofsoulmaking

[trekkele]

You mentioned in one of your tags that you'd like to write a fic where the batkids find out Alfred wasn't so awesome a parent to Bruce and I wanted to ask if you'd like to share some ideas and directions where you could imagine it going?

Would it change the way the kids think and act around Alfred? Or Bruce? And what are some Major Mistakes Alfred made that in retrospect make a lot of sense regarding Bruce's parenting? And what sent the boulder of realisation going in the first place?

I know it sounds like I'm asking for spoilers or the actual, complete plotline which you probably haven't thought out yet, but I'm just curious about various versions of situations and realisations you think could happen. Or things that you'd like to work into your fic but it just wouldn't fit.

Basically, I love your writing and I love this kind of DramaTM within the Batfam and I'd cherish any crumb of information you would like to share.

Thank you and have a wonderful day! <3

Ok so this premise does rely on good dad Bruce, not because shitty parents cant come from shitty parents (they do, usually) but because i think seeing Bruce not do the things Alfred does would be how the kids (specifically Dick) realize what kind of parent Alfred is.

And this is really a reaction to the “Alfred is a saint for putting up with Bruce” fandom attitude because if you, as a parent or a guardian, are incapable of parenting a kid, no matter how difficult that kid is, it is your responsibility to either find a way to become what your kid needs or find someone who can. I know a lot of us had shitty parents but a traumatized nine year old shouldnt be “put up with” or “handled” they should be parented. At the very least they should be loved, and they should know they are loved. (Gets off parenting soapbox, climbs onto fandom soapbox)

Also every time i think about this fic i start thinking “maybe Alfred deserves some more grace” because he was put in a pretty impossible situation immediately after losing two people he deeply respected, if not loved, and lets be reasonable the 80-90s were uh, not an ideal time for difficult parenting, and the therapy available for children back then would have probably made things worse if not outright given Bruce ptsd (if he didnt already have that), so theres that. On the other hand, Alfred is also fairly consistently shown as being deeply unkind about idiosyncrasies, and unwilling to admit when he’s wrong.

And theres only so many times you can call your adult child an idiot, and imply that you believe every one of their choices to be invalid or wrong, before it turns out that you are Part of The Problem, or at the very least, A Bitch.

Anyways.

The thing is, i dont think it would change much. I think they might stop taking Alfreds word as gospel, especially in regards to Bruce, and i think they might be more forgiving towards Bruce when he messes up in the long term, but the truth is that whats it going to change? How do you apologize to someone for that? What are you apologizing for?

Because ultimately i dont think Bruce is ready to admit that Alfred is, or was, wrong. Bruce knows he was a bad kid, a difficult kid. His teachers and his family and the newspapers, and even Alfred, have admitted that Bruce was a hard kid to raise. Probably harder to love. He’s never surprised when people leave him, after all.

He does know his own kids don’t deserve that style of parenting though. But thats because they’re better than him. He has to do better because they deserve better, because he chose to be there for them. Alfred never really got that choice, did he? Bruce’s parents trusted Alfred, and Alfred stayed out of his respect for them. Not the bratty kid who cried for a year and refused to speak and would hide under the bed instead of sleep.

And thats another thing - if Bruce admits that Alfred wasnt a good parent, if he admits that Alfred made some terrible mistakes, does that mean he’s betraying the trust his parents placed in him? Is he casting blame onto two people he can only idolize, because to do otherwise is to admit he doesn’t remember much of them anymore?

As for how the kids find out, i think Dick realized in his own. I think Jason realizes because Dick stops him from walking in and interrupting a conversation between the two and before he can ask whats going on he hears Alfred slap Bruce. Im not sure about the rest.

*i started answering this, got distracted, finished writing it in my head, and then forgot i never answered it in reality. But i think thats most of what i wanted to say.

[spiderton]

Spiderton headcanons. Go

anon i love you forever. anyway SORRY I DIDNT ANSWER THJS INSTANLY IM A LAZY ASS BUT HERES A LOT. OR A FEW. depends

- spiderton is somewhere always in his mid 30s or late 20s, probably.. changes up? maybe he was 28 when he was apart of the military and then 35(?) after most of the events of patapon tbh. who knows how long the rainbow bridge took to built though

- theres many ways that spiderton couldve joined the war but thanks to a friend i just hc'd that he was a mechanic that worked on most of the mechanical side of the zigoton empire. hes interested in tanks of course (because he got taught likw that rosetinted version of war in school or something) and on the side i feel like he also enjoys architecture and weaponary. he often compliments kharmas home but never herself becayse shes a little tooo mean to him

- and speaking of tanks the tank spiderton built (he built it. to clarify here although some think its just whatever demons they made a deal with) was rushed due to fhe conditions of patapons slowly beating up troops and resources going low, and with gong basically dead he rushed the tank up andnwent to battle inexperienced. the original sketches of the ziggerzank were probably so much more ambitious and grand, like the zugagang that probably had plenty of time to be built compared to.. ziggerzank and all. and really he doesnt like being a fan of being uncredited for his work whatsoever

- very minor hc but he probably wore some specialized gloves to even use the fire lance. zigotons biologically wise to me have pretty weak skin underneath the fur, and spiderton has pawpads that can easily burn, and often fire enchanted weapons feel BOILING hot so. he wore basically oven mittens that are actually flexible. they werent comfy to wear and sometimes when training he even forgot them and got burnt a little even (and hes embarrassed by that honestly)

- autistic and disabled. disabled wise it switches i think but mainly, if he lived, he ended up getting partial (? could be using this wrong feel free to tell me) leg paralysis because whatever beatup he got was NOT good on his spinal cordhe ended up keeping winona to help with walking sometimes (shes not really the best) and get from place to place, but he probably just uses something like the rewalk equivalent to get around. that or he ends up loosing a leg and has a prosthetic.. could be explaining this all wrong but i imagine it all humanwise, but can be canonwise too of course

- winona (his warhorse, and name was given by uhhh.... il forgot im so sorry) wasnt the best experienced horse bc most of the other warhorses ended up dying during battle, and winona was one of the last horses that they just gave them to spiderton. he probably had OTHER horses while training but he got stuck with winona, and winona just often acts like a big cat to be honest

- also hes a trans man. dont ask how hes many things i really like him. that or hes cis i dont really care which either but i like him being transgender.. youd know why. zigoton culture is probably netural or... Fuckingnhorrid about trans people when i think about it for too long agguhh but his mom probably didnt even care.. probably bisexual too

- also his mom, widowton (VERY basic name im sorry) ended up being a widow unironically. and she also ate spidertons dad because he wasnt a good dad and all. no one else really knows that fact and assumed he went missing however, but spiderton doesnt have.. the best relationship with his mom that he moved out to apartments when he was 19. he doesnt have any other family members that he knows of..

- spiderton is REALLY impressed by karmen architecture and weapons. probably after the ah-oohs were murdered off and the karmens got to flourish.. he just finds them very impressive, beautiful, and marvels of technology. not entirely related but got the feeling that karmens at least had a help inventing guns or something, but they arent very widespread

- spidertons real name is kumoton. its not his deadname to clarify.. he didnt bother to change it. only a few people ever call him kumo however because mostly everyone just knows him as general spiderton that he doesnt bother to correct (and being called general MIGHT make him happy if it didnt remind him of so much horrid shit)

- and uhh his Relationships he probably has a good friendship with kimen if they ever met! they always gave off the vibes that theyre nerds a little so they geek about the smallest things. maybe kimen likes biology and tells spiderton everything he knows about gastropods (gancheeks, mainly) and spiderton writes it all down because hes slowly growing impressed too!

- him and beetleton is. wow this is a mess but i feel like nonship wise they were friends at least. bickering friends but they probably DID care for each other, and beetleton doesnt have.. a lot of people to lightheartedly bicker with. i dont think beetleton ever left spiderton to die on purpose too, and when he ever realizes that spiderton died or was in critical injury and couldnt return? beetleton blames himself heavily on that.

- and then more onto kuwa, if he was kumoTAN itd be a lot more messy. kumotan wouldnt really forgive kuwagattan, and one of the reasons i feel he doesnt appear is because hes just been forgotten by everyone else, but kuwagattan never forgot and hes just so sorry for everything. even if kuwagattan is a demon, he still wonders what kumotan would think- and somehow convinced himself that maybe kumotan would come over and help him with this fight! and then he didnt. oops

- if spiderton did live though he probably wouldnt know of kuwagattan, at leaaast at first.... he just assumed beetleton died in the war and doesnt like to ever think about it, and mayhe is a little mad but his feelings are just conflicted. and then kuwa SOMEHOW comes back and now spiderton has to deal with the war he was in and now is trying to avoid reminding him of every single mistake he made. and its gonna be a lot

- i could say so much abut the spiderkuwa dynamic too but i could just imagine kuwagattan just casually breaking into spidertons apartment and going Hey uhmmm i need a place to stay and youre all i know....... and jts the fucking Uhm... Meow? scene trope thing basically. and now spiderton has this giant hot demon for a roommate. its actually okay though but remember what i said before? yeah

- also spiderton probably doesnt have a lot of friends. probably was homeschooled real often, that or he DID go to physical school once in a while.. always felt like his only other friends outside of beetleton were probably some of his engineering buddies (one of which is like. one of the few first ocs i made LOL) before he was dragged into being a general.. hes too awkward to ever revisit or anything

- always had the feeling that spiderton is based on these silk weavers.. theres probably red ones but they just come to mind first, so now he probably smells like bananas LOL

- (honestly though he'd just smell like gasoline or sweat. that or both, he doesnt shower real often but he likes to swim surprisingly sometimes)

[malinelle]

the thing with the breakdancing dad thing is like . for clarify i am in almost the same situation as ppl think shes in i was raised by my mom who was financially neglecting me and cutting my dad off from me when he wanted to see me and she was taking the child support money he was paying her to spend on herself i am the person who is the most in a position to sympathize with him but like i just dont. bec okay

that wasnt that many videos and the fact that its all holidays and special events isnt at all contradictory with 'he was there for some big events but he wasnt There in our lives', and the fact that this is also just like how home videos tend to work makes them really not convincing "evidence" of a happy childhood. like were u expecting to see videos of her saying she fucking hates her dad and hes never there for her To The Camera. when i was with my moms side of the family obviously you smile for pictures and act cute in front of the camera bc they get mad at you if you dont! also hes REALLY invading their privacy by posting videos that arent even of her and are instead of his other kids who literally have nothing to do with this. ALSO childhood evidence is always going to be skewed in the parent's favor bc the kid straight up isnt old enough to rly be able to advocate for themselves. notice how the videos switch to photos as she gets older meaning we have no idea how they interacted when they talked and the one text message she shows is them interacting rly awkwardly like two distant acquaintances

man fuck this dude for calling it "brainwashing". like Again it literally happened to me my mom was lying to me to steal money that was meant for us but he could just. say that. the concrete thing she did wrong. instead of being like It Was The Genders.

theres no proof that he paid anything. he said millions but like he just said that. people can lie. very silly and quirky that he has video evidence of his 10 yr old kid talking about youtube as definitive proof he was a loving father but he cant figure out how to censor one of the bajillion emails they send you when you pay medical bills. tbc i dont rly think he shouldve posted either bc again sensitive information but if youre gonna doxx your kids at least do it in a way that looks less like youre trying to use unreliable footage to make an emotional appeal over the Factual Innacuracies. same thing with screenshots of all the insane bitchy things your daughter and wife are totally saying

the most damning thing: dude you have your daughters phone number. if you really had a good relationship and she was exaggerating to make a story funnier you wouldve messaged her like "??? we made lasagna together last week why didnt you tell me i abandoned you at your mothers doorstep" and she wouldve been like "im sorry father i sold you out for views" and then she wouldve made a video breaking keyfabe. personally i dont believe women are insane gender-brainwashed lunatics so i figure she had her reasons

he stresses their politics differ a lot so my actual projection is that i figure madi as a kid was fine with her dad only showing up for holidays and not really being around and wasnt really thinking about money stuff but then as she grew up she started re-examining their relationship and drifted away from him as he became a sexist bitcoin breakdancer and so eventually she had a negative enough view of him to make a pretty uncharitable video bc if you and your dad had a huge argument over him being a sexist bitcoin breakdancer and then you saw a tiktok challenge about funny trauma you might very well think "oh man. the fact that my dad divorced my mom and then started a breakdancing career is funny as hell. im going to flatten this fairly complicated family history to fit into a tiktok" and then when her dad who she doesnt like anymore made a public response she doubled down bc fuck that guy he hates women. its not like shes sending hitmen to his front door she made a mean tiktok. ppl are acting like this has destroyed his reputation but im gonna go out on a limb and say that the ppl making fun of him for being a deadbeat dad are probably not ppl who otherwise wouldve been fans of a sexist bitcoin breakdancer. i think his core audience was never gonna be shattered by this which i am more sure of bc even before he posted a reply bitcoin bros were gathering around him like protective mother birds. if he didnt want his daughter to disrespect him and re-examine his treatment of her as an adult with a more critical eye, personally i would suggest he be nicer to his daughter and not call her brainwashed or talk about how its all genders fault. i think that would really help convince her to have a more positive view of him

[angabby-zzz]

It feels like gabbys in like a constant cycle of having smth tragic happen 2 her and then after days of being upset over it she decides to change and try to deal w the problem by just making friends (as in thats just how she met angel and kathee)

Anyway thinking maybe after her kinda processing the fact that the gods r real and her dad is one of them angel is like idk man maybe we should start tryna talk to people here and shes like hm ok. And she finds out theres a volleyball court there and shes like this looks ok and tries 2 join in and thats when she meets kathee cuz its like. Obv ppl know theres a dionysus kid now for the first time in a bit and she hadnt come out to do anything until now and its also kathees first summer there so shes like yk what idk whats so special abt this girl but shes cool im gonna b her friend 👍 and so they become friends

Since shes a cabin counselor (shes literally the only one in her cabin she doesnt have a choice) i think the other counselors there would help out w her getting used 2 camp n what 2 do so shes like 👍 Ok i have new ppl who r nice 2 me here thats cool

💀Until the ares cabin does their toilet initiation thing and shes like dude wtf????? what is ur problem and they start fighting and like one of her counselor friends (i have yet 2 decide who) is like ok guys chill tf out leave her alone ummm and they go the showers for gabby 2 clean herself and shes like man ig i gotta watch out 4 some ppl here but at least i have nice guys w me so hopefully itll b cool

After that she gets more like used 2 how camp is n stuff but doesnt rlly start talking 2 dionysus properly til like near the end of the summer and then her 2nd summer she starts being more like in2 being w him n stuff. Abt her mom i think maybe she was iris messaged by like . Shit idk maybe even dionysus . or maybe angel once he found out that was a thing and decided to tell her abt it after he called his mom (side note i think itd be silly cute awesome if dionysus kinda pulled him aside and was like hey u gotta help her get like better n stuff i get it if she doesnt talk 2 me n stuff but i dont want her 2 b mega depressed every day now and angels like oh um ok sir [fearing 4 his life] so then after that angel kinda like helps her out w stuff how he can [like suggesting places / ppl to hang out w since hes like glued 2 serenitys side and shes also sporty cool like gabby is])

Thinking maybe she n angel have like a mini like conflict or wtva about him feeling left out n stuff cuz she spends a lot of her time doing sportsy training stuff or being w her other friends and he was used 2 them being each others like main guy they hang out w but its like. Not spoken about much cuz he doesnt wanna sound mega dependent on her n stuff and obv shes her own person she can do what she wants. Tbh this is still a point in the current story cuz i literally have a bit where he hangs out w milan for a bit in sadness cuz shes busy doing magic stuff w nishith and itzel? Also i dont mean that gabby got sick of him or wtva dont get the wrong idea she still has him as The #1 Guy ever shes just busy w other stuff a lot to keep her from thinking 2 much abt like . Life (girl cannot b alone w her thoughts)

I didnt proofread any of this i hope i didnt contradict myself much or anything. Btw this isnt all in order of what happened i didnt mean 4 this 2 become a long post i just started talking 💀

[dirtycomputeremotionpicture]

i take a lot of damage when i get told im like my dad but it does Not compare to the amount of psychic damage when someone tells me im like my mum

[bookloverbilly]

billy hargrove’s natal chart - a dissection

okay so im an astrology freak and decide to punch billy’s bday into a birth chart calculator with random times to get his natal chart and figure out what his rising sign is (as well as his other placements). obv astrology is whatever you want it to mean/not mean but his chart is... interesting to say the least! long post under the cut.

(i am shaking and crying as i type this up, our poor boy)

the first time I plugged in (cant remember what it was) he got libra rising. makes sense, given he cares abt his looks a lot, but it wasnt quite right. libra risings are all abt harmony and bringing people together, wanting to create a seamless and beautiful existence for themselves. that is not billy. that man is chaos.

next he got scorpio. a good contender, but a lot of scorpio risings are a speek-unless-spoken-to group. with friends they are loud and feel like they can be their true selves, but scorpio risings often come off as introverted and only concerned with themselves (which is not true, they just typically dont feel the need to butt into every convo around them & have no desire to do so). this also didnt feel right for billy. he’s loud, he’s confident, he’s the center of attention. when he is in the room you know it.

which brings me to my third and final try....

Leo rising. that just sounds right, doesnt it? I mean, just looking at billy he already has a golden lions mane. not to mention his pride in himself, his confidence, the way he fights dirty when he feels made a fool. oh yeah. he’s a leo rising for sure.

so what does that make the rest of his chart?

well, to the surprise of no one, billy has fire signs for his big 3!

with his sun in aries, his moon in sag, and his rising in leo, it’s no wonder this firecracker lit up our hearts!! i mean, hes unhinged!! a ball of rage!!! a fire that consumes all he comes across!!

his aries sun is something we all picked up on from the get go--his ego is entirely consumed by fire. he’s a leader, the king of hawkins, and he makes sure everyone knows it.

his sag moon rules his emotions and can make them volatile, but not in the way you might think. he has split-second decision making and can be quite impulsive because of the way his emotions burn through him, yes. but as someone with a sag moon as well, i can attest that the "bad” emotions (anger, sadness, regret, etc) last eons longer than “good” emotions, which can make you believe youre only ever going to hurt and be hurt. sag moons are also very independent--we dont need anyone, but we like to have people in our lives we can count on. just dont get too close, or too smothering. he needs room to breathe on his own without others butting in. (knowing hes a sag moon for sure... yeah, no wonder i became attached to this rat the first second i saw him)

the rest of his chart tells a different story (one fanfic writers have been telling for... oh, just a few years now)

“Mercury represents the way you recognize patterns, absorb and process information, and exchange ideas and information with others.”

with his pisces in mercury you may be like.... no... but HEAR ME OUT!

pisces (wherever it lands in your chart) is the most intuitive sign. Having your Mercury in Pisces amplifies your intuition and helps you "feel" things that other people only think. youre probs like “op, billy doesnt care about people” but youre WRONG. billy has had to be intuitive ever since his dad threw the first punch. he learned to read people from a very young age because of that. also, pisces placements often have a connection to the arts, and billy loves his music <3 while pisces placement are typically describes as “dreamy” i believe this was beaten out of billy at a young age. with his mother we would see this pisces placement shine, but she was out of his life before she could give him more of the whimsy he deserves.

“Venus governs courtship and adoration, as well as personal taste and aesthetics. Venus represents your values, including your relationship with finances and material possessions.”

his venus in taurus makes me want to curl up in a ball and sob and throw up an thrash around. taurus placements love stability. they love nesting, love to be comfortable and at peace in their home, love to be taken care of the same way they take care of others. in love, they take their time to truly commit to someone. they desire security, stability, and comfort. all things billy’s life is void of. god his entire existence is the opposite of what his chart says he needs to thrive.

“Mars is the planet of passion, anger, war, assertion, and separation, and its placement in your birth chart indicates how you pursue your goals, assert yourself, attack and defend, and cut people or circumstances off.”

his mars is in scopio retrograde (Rx). when mars is in retrograde, the forward energy of mars is turned inwards, rather than it being easily expressed in outward, public actions. this energy being turned towards his inner-self can feel quite intense. this can cause him to be more explosive when provoked because of the internal, personal fires raging inside of him. with mars in scorpio, billy has a tendency to be overly aggressive and pushy when he wants something (or wants you to stop doing something). howeverrrrr with it being in Rx, billy is not always able to act on his emotions and has to stifle his anger down around the object of his anger, his dad--which is why we see him blow up so often away from his home. billy is unable (through fear or otherwise) to stick up to his father, so he holds onto the emotions until he can release them on someone else. 

“Jupiter is a large and lucky planet that encourages us to expand our wealth and minds. It is the planet of abundance, growth, and optimism. This expansive planet is all about the higher mind and is associated with philosophy, truth, and religion, giving us a larger lens of which we can experience the world.”

with his jupiter in cancer, billy is a feeler. godddamn, i mean his whole chart is billy just begging someone to love him and understand him. im throwing up as i type this i just love him so much. jupiter is alllll about emotional growth, and with this planet being in cancer billy has an opportunity for growth through emotional awareness </3 cancer is a sensitive sign which means billy has a tendency to overreact and take things personally. which, yeah. billy is blamed for every wrong thing in his family’s life. compassion drives his cancer in jupiter. it is janes compassion for him that reminded billy of the love he once had in his life, and gave him the energy he needed to fight back against all the abuse he’s suffered to prove that he does care, he does love. this love quite literally saved the day, even at the expense of billy’s life. billy put his life on the line to save the life of a 13 year old he’s only ever met in his mind because she was the first person to truly see him since his mother left. im unwell typing this out. 

“Saturn represents discipline and maturity.”

with his saturn being in aries billy is sometimes at odds with himself. this tells us he can be intensely provocative one moment and fearful of showing too much of himself the next. he has a big presence, but insecurities he still needs to overcome. hes charasmatic, a leader. he can get quite defensive, which is normal for aries in saturn. he comes off as being confrontational because he might feel that he has to prove himself. bc of this insecurity, he may appear as a "show off" in a very direct manner which may make others feel uncomfortable at the overt displays of bravado.... CMON NOW... IF THAT ISNT BILLY... can also have anger management issues until you learn what is worth the effort of an emotional outburst and what isnt... HELLOOOOOOOO THATS HE!

(im skipping uranus and neptune bc theyre generational and all the kids in the show should have the same ones as him. im too lazy to look it up tho so sorry if theyre significant. i just wanna keep it to the meat and bones of billy uknow how it is.)

“Pluto shows the area of life where you'll personally face the intense powers of creation and destruction. People born with Pluto being retrograde in natal chart are very secretive and mysterious."

billy’s pluto in virgo can be obsessed with the ideals of perfection and the urge for self-purification. with this sign being in Rx, these ideals are pushed inwards. because this planet is in virgo (stability) which follows leo (chaos), this can explain the butting of heads billy experiences with his father, as his father’s generation was born with leo in pluto. billy’s virgo leads him down a path of self-analysis, self-criticism, and self-purification that caused him to “grow up” at a early age--no doubt heightened by his father’s abuse. this generation of pluto in virgo are all about raging against the machine and pushing societies boundaries. just think of this blonde bitch’s loud music and tight jeans. mans did not gaf about what others thought abt him (outwardly).

so... yeah. there’s my long winded ramble about the most important aspects of billy’s chart! idk how to read the circle chart yet, but i could make another post about his house placements or the signs i left out if you guys would want. i think his chart is rly accurate and fanfic writers are literal GODS for picking up all of this from the less-than-30-mins of screen time we got from him <3

thank you for reading and letting me spew my astrology knowledge in a fandom space <3

[hey-its-cweepy]

Okay so first off, idk if its alright I do smth like this or not, if it is please let me know-

ALSO- I wanted to try my hand at other characters too! So I kinda just yeeted some of my/your ocs into a wheel and hoped for the best lol

Credit where credit is due: Tiam, Mythra, Leroy and Mellow belong to @fumikomiyasaki!

Anyway-

Marinus and Tiam:

As much as I joke around that he'd just violently grab Tiam and drink from the little straw on his head, (,,, which technically isnt a joke bcs he would and then say sorry while feeling really bad, especially if he left bruises,,,) Marinus would definitely still try to be careful to not hurt Tiam real bad- he'd also always thank him for the drink and be apologetic if he scared/hurt him, unless,,,, yk,,,, you like that sort of thing,,,,,,

Bullies? No problem! With Marinus by your side they probably already went "missing" got eaten but if you asked if he'd seen them, he'd just go "Nope, no idea where they could be :)" and then resume gremlin thoughts

Marinus will sometimes forget certain words from time to time, considering his mom didnt even really want him to get an education and just wanted him to be like a feral siren-

Expect minor things like "Holy shit, Tiam, its a bunch of quack quacks!" And they're freaking ducks-

And speaking of ducks- Marinus hates birds (mainly seagulls/pelicans) but ducks are an exception because "They're the only birds that are nice to me" so I dont think he'd get along too well with winged characters like Rubina-😔✌️

MARINUS WOULD NEVER BITE, SCRATCH, HISS OR GROWL AT TIAM- Unless of course he asked him too

Marinus WOULD however h*ld h*nds (how sinful) and Tiam's crooked smiles will be met with a sharped tooth gremlin smile <3

Also yes, you are right, a LOT of characters (my own/discord friend OCS) are afraid of Marinus or wanna fight 😔🤣 (I think its funny-)

However, just because Marinus has people scared of him, doesnt mean he isnt scared of things too! And he will absolutely freak out if anyone/anything covers his mouth (actually, I think being restrained in general could go here), if someone sees him while he's in siren form, etc (I'll probably add on more another time lol)

I almost forgor to mention, but hair is kinda a big thing for sirens (at least in my head, idk if disney will take it and throw it in my face that its not 💀) so, if Mari is comfy enough, he'd definitely be letting Tiam touch his hair, style it, do whatever with it tbh lol and expect him to do the same with Tiam's! (No, he doesnt care if its sticky-)

Im starting to think of ideas that are more dating-like and idk if thats ok so next character

Amos and Mythra:

THE DANCE COUPLE!!!

Probably only see each other on few occasions bc different schools 😔✌️

Maybe they could teach each other new moves too 👀

Amos, however, will dip just as fast as my dad did the moment somebody from her school/dorm walk in 💀💀💀

He's honestly a real charmer tho and knows how to treat a lady :tantrums:

I imagine ears/tails are also important to beast-people (?) just like hair is for sirens (unless Disney will yeet that im wrong in my face too-) so maybe some nice scenario of Mythra petting/gently scratching his ears while Amos purrs? 🥺 And then he gotta dip bcs Sindren 💀/LH /NF

I'll be honest, Amos is one of the newer characters and hasnt been developed as much as older characters that I havent introduced lol

Momo and Mellow

OKAY so- Momo (blue haired plant baby, I have posted him here before but I need to post a ref lol- I WILL DO THAT SOON THO-) has a habit of straight up running away from people that are taller than her, I mean freaking BOLTING the moment someone bigger than 5'10 (177cm) is in her vision-

But luckily, Mildew seems to be smaller than that, so she'll at least stay! :D

In order for them to be friends tho, they'd have to interact without Dallas in the picture (another piss gremlin I have yet to post a ref of, but basically he tells Momo bs to isolate her from everyone and she'd believe it because toxic relationships✨)

Momo would be really shy at first though, but I think it could work! Like a slowburn friendship (⁠ㆁ⁠ω⁠ㆁ⁠)

Momo is a little passionate about art (maybe not enough to go into full on rambles about different styles n stuff but enough to try it out herself although she doesnt usually share her artworks) so he'd probably occasionally glance over and stare a bit if she notices him making something but looking away immediately if Mellow looks back

(some Momo art for reference!)

Dallas and Leroy

I do not know if Leroy understands that Dallas is just being a crotch gremlin because his parents spoiled him rotten (and he's also only like... 15 💀) but regardless-

Dallas would hands down find a way to try and "egg on" Leroy to do something and then play the victim card in front of Crowley like he does to all the "big spooky" OCs

Like bullying the clothes he wears when he finds out its a heating issue and not "because he dresses weird", probably like "You're telling me a little bit of sunshine is going to screw you over? Quit being so sensitive"

HOWEVER, I feel like he'd just end up annoyed at the spiteful pranks and then the tables would turn as now its Dallas being served some humble pie (⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)

(Some Dallas art for reference!)

DONT LET THE EYES FOOL YOU HE'S A LITTLE TOXIC AND HATEFUL GREMLIN

[malfoystilinskii05]

My opinion on Euphoria S2E5…

⚠️Spoilers⚠️

warnings: swearing, violence?!, mentions of sex trafficking, (lmk if more)

-i thought this shit was so funny…

-sorry not sorry

-he lwky deserved it

-ayo and didn’t elliot know abt the suitcase?

-rue told him abt the plan… he may not have known abt the suitcase specifically but he knew something…

-he’s just sus lwky

-but anyways rue is menace😭

-like the way she is with her mom

-made me tear up lwky

-z is such an amazing actress i can’t stress that enough

-and jules omg she gets on my fucking nerves

-it irks me fr

-i get how she had the right intentions but like no🖐🏽

-go get help🙏🏽

-like how tf are you gonna sit there and claim to ‘love’ rue when you fucked elliot

-she cheated on rue

-but claims to care abt her well-being

-make it make sense sis

-this reminded me of S1E1

-where rue just got back from rehab

-and she sees jules riding her bike

-i lwky thought it was SUS how elliot left rues house and goes out to smoke

-seems a bit weird like you could’ve gone anywhere else

-like they just had a whole intervention for their friend who’s a drug addict

-but hey maybe i’m reading to much into it

-i understand that he has his own addiction to worry abt

-i don’t blame him yk

-i just feel like maybe it was done with the wrong intentions

-dominic fike looks good tho can’t lie <3

-GET IT MADDY GIRLLL

-this scene was just wow

-i was shocked when rue just dropped that bomb 💣

-i thought it was cute how suze wanted to protect cassie

-and i also love when they’re all acting together

-this scene was rlly said to me

-like the disrespect

-after everything fez has done for her

-ikik she’s out of it

-with her withdrawals and shit

-but it’s still fucked up…

-she fr has a death wish 💀

-anything for drugs ig

-i say this once and i’ll say it again

-Z IS AN AMAZING ACTRESS😍

-the way they have these amazing shots

-cool cool 😎

-brought tears to my eyes

-made me rlly emotional

-as did the whole show tbh

-the way she wore her dads sweater…

-and last but not least

-LAURIE SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME

-she might be small but she’s so scary

-like i think of rue didnt jump out that window she would’ve been trafficked or some shit

-and how the hell did that dude not wake up

-like the reason they have him sleep on the couch, with a gun by his side is to stop her from trying to leave

-idk idk

-this episode was chaotic per usual

-took a lot out of me tbh

-i mean let’s keep it real

-what episode of euphoria doesn’t take a lot out of you

-next week is super bowl sunday and euphoria day…i’m so fucking happy

(i love football, so a little conflicted abt not seeing euphoria right away but that’s alright)

-

-

-

(pls no hate, just my opinion)

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from The Lost Tomb, part 3

I didn’t mean for this to stray into angst but like the lack of updates with Li Cu in LTR?? I had to do it to em.

Wushanju Crew Chat, 11:05pm

Li Cu: what’s up losers I’m outside

Li Cu: someone come on and open the damn door

Wang Meng: Language:(

Li Cu: fine, someone come on and open the damn door please

Snake Eyes Chat, 7:00am

Wu Xie: hey are you awake? Sorry I missed you coming in:) was finishing up some work. How was the end of your first semester? Did that geology paper go well? Did the food budget work out or do you need some extra money next semester?

Li Cu: yeah about your work

Li Cu: heard a little rumor

Li Cu: about you going through some stuff during ur recent trip

Li Cu: some stuff you maybe forgot to mention

Li Cu: and you told me we gotta check in with stuff, so this is me checking in, okay

Wu Xie: oh? What stuff?

Li Cu: idk just like

Li Cu: THE STUFF WITH YOU ALMOST FUCKING DYING FOR FUCKING MONTHS AND THE WAREHOUSE SHIT AND ERJING AND PEOPLE HURT YOU AND WHAT THE FUCK IS A THUNDER CITY AND NOONE FUCKING CALLED ME ABT THOSE PARTS ONCE

Wu Xie: oh. That stuff.

Li Cu: yeah asshat I’m in the kitchen whenever you’re ready to explain your fucking bullshit. Also you’re out of milk wtf how am I supposed to make breakfast here

Main Chat, 11:14am

Wu Xie: okay so it’s possible I fucked up a little bit.

Wang Pangzi: THERES JUST SO MUCH YOU COULD BE REFERRING TO I DONT KNOW WHERE TO START

Zhang Qiling: What’s wrong?

Honorary Wu Chat, 11:30am

Wang Pangzi: KID IM SO SORRY THAT PUNK IS A TRAINWRECK BUT YOU KNEW THAT

Wang Meng: Welcome home, Li Cu <3 not much has changed, ultimately.

Wang Pangzi: IT DIDNT EVEN OCCUR TO ME THAT HE WOULDNT TELL YOU EVERYTHING ABOUT IT ONCE THE REST OF US FIGURED IT OUT

WAIT HOW DID YOU FIND OUT

Li Cu: it’s okay. not your fault, uncle. Doesn’t matter how I found out. Wait wait hold on what do you mean “the rest of us figured it out” who figured it out

Wang Pangzi: SAY HELLO LIU SANG

Liu Sang: …hello.

Wang Pangzi: SAY MORE THAN THAT.

Liu Sang: uh…so you’re Wu Xie’s protégé, huh?

Li Cu: oh well howdy there homewrecker

Liu Sang: Excuse me??

Zhang Qiling: I think someone on the roof is calling me and I should go find out.

Wang Meng: I would also very much like to be removed from this conversation.

Wang Pangzi: AHAHAHAHA KIDDO IVE MISSED YOU

Li Cu: all I’m saying is aren’t you the little creep who’s obsessed with Xiao Ge

Liu Sang: ???

Zhang Qiling: Li Cu is referring to a brief period of irrational thought on Wu Xie’s part, where he mistakenly believed you to be a threat to our relationship.

Liu Sang: what do you mean a threat??

Wang Pangzi: WHAT DO YOU MEAN TIANZHEN HAD “A BRIEF PERIOD OF IRRATIONAL THOUGHT”

YOUVE MET YOUR HUSBAND RIGHT

Wang Meng: can you please take me off this chat.

Liu Sang: Wait, so Wu Xie told you about me, but…reading between the lines, he didn’t mention the cancer or anything bad that happened? Oh yikes.

Li Cu: don’t change the subject “Liu Sang”

if that is your real name

Like yeah you’re right abt it but still

just saying

heard you got good ears but I’ve got snake powers

kinda

so like no more funny business okay you superhearing harlot

Wang Meng: LANGUAGE, LI CU. IN THIS HOUSE WE SHOW GOOD MANNERS.

Wang Pangzi: LMAO OH DO WE NOW

Zhang Qiling: Li Cu, this is all unnecessary and childish. Please apologize.

Li Cu: you say that now bruh but apparently you weren’t complaining when he was all “idol this” and “idol that”

oh and hey Wang Meng while we’re here can I show you my business class grade report later bc Wu Xie is all “what matters is that you learned and enjoyed the experience” blah blah all eat pray love you know how he gets and I want to actually discuss areas to improve so that when I take over this joint I do better than Wu Xie? Tho that shouldnt be hard lol

Wang Meng: hurtful but accurate. I’ll bring my best red pen:)

Liu Sang: oh my god. I’m too jetlagged to keep up with any of this.

Wang Pangzi: BEST. DAY. EVER. IM SCREENSHOTTING THIS FOR HEI XIAZI.

Not A Homewrecker Chat, 11:52am

Liu Sang: Okay, we started off on the wrong foot.

Li Cu: I agree let’s start over

Start with how your little prank game almost got ppl killed

Liu Sang: And I seriously regret that. But we moved past that.

Wow, he seriously skipped over so much bullshit but didn’t skimp on mine, huh.

Li Cu: AHA so you ADMIT IT

Liu Sang: I’d like to think I’ve grown since then. That I’ve come to see Xiao Ge as a person and mentor, rather than an idol. I count Pangzi and Wu Xie as my close friends. I’m going to be staying here with them right now, I hope you can be okay with that.

Li Cu: see in my head you were going to be a lot less mature about it and I had a bunch of great follow-up insults planned

Liu Sang: I figured. I’d like us to be friends, though. Or at least not enemies.

Li Cu: okay but only bc you don’t know me yet so you won’t judge too much for this and I need to get this out to somebody I’ve been thinking about it for hours and my friends are still in finals and I’m stressing a little bit maybe

Liu Sang: ?

Li Cu: I yelled at dad

*Wu Xie sorry autocorrect

Liu Sang: …uh huh.

Li Cu: I yelled at him earlier. for keeping all that stuff from me. He started crying

Liu Sang: Wu Xie has been pretty emotional since we got back. Not necessarily your fault.

Li Cu: I made him cry right there at the kitchen sink and it felt like maybe the worst thing I’ve ever done

Snake venom and stabbings, no tears

Me saying I wouldn’t have gone to his funeral, all tears

Which I know was shitty to say but I was really mad

Liu Sang: If it’s any consolation, I think Wu Xie can understand the concept of being led by his emotions to make bad decisions…better than most people.

Li Cu: Xiao Ge came in then and looked weird

Like weirder than usual

Like he didn’t know which of us to be more mad at

Liu Sang: A common problem for the iron triangle, I understand.

Li Cu: I just ran out I didn’t have words right then and I feel stupid

but whenever they come back from their walk I’m gonna say sorry and stuff bc i could’ve come home to his funeral and I’m mad about it but also like. I could have come home to his funeral. I can get mean when I’m in a freakout mood. It’s not like I was scared or anything at all I don’t get scared really anymore ever but just like. Freaked out.

Liu Sang: He’s probably going to say sorry, too.

Li Cu: sorry I called you a homewrecker. Didn’t mean to slut-shame either

Liu Sang: I admit that after the initial shock, it was pretty funny. Super hearing harlot, it should be on my business card;)

Li Cu: this situation with Wu Xie is weird but kinda good ya know. And I have these freakouts sometimes that something maybe bad could happen to this situation. So consider this a shovel talk. But like, also not a shovel talk at the same time.

also I appreciate you saving his life and whatnot

Liu Sang: Noted. Now. Coffee?

Li Cu: sounds sick.

Be in the kitchen in 10. You can pick out what we watch for the household tv show tonight. no way is Wu Xie choosing some dry documentary about gravestone rubbings again. Pangzi just watches real housewives reruns and Xiao Ge won’t watch tv after he caught the last half hour of A Walk To Remember. Also i need my phone now to send some $ to Hei Xiazi since I owe him for…providing some intel

Liu Sang: Not even surprised.

[ablackfangirlwrites]

Y/n and aizawa get in a real big fight and y/n ends up kissing hawks and y/n keeps it’s a secret but aizawa ends up finding out through eri

Ooooo I like this one a lot!!! I hope u enjoy it I had a lot of fun writing it💕

"I think your overreaching." You said in a monotone to Aizawa

"I think your under reacting." He spat back at you, "Obviously, he has an another motive."

You rolled your eyes, "Hes my friend. Thats it shouta. Hes been my friends forever. Hawks is harmless."

The two of you were arguing about the only thing you two ever aruged about

Hawks

Aizawa wasn't comfortable with the realtionship that the two of you had

The lastest issue being an interview the two of you did together and hawks couldn't seem to keep his hands to himself

Aizawa didnt care that you two had practically grew up together

Or that the two of you did most of your missions together

One because whenever hawks was around it was obvious he was flirting with you dispite you being in a relationship with Aizawa

And two even through he knew you were fateful he couldnt stop the voice in the back of his mind saying maybe you would rather be with someone your own age

Someone you could relate to better

Unlike him who by his own words was a 'tired old man'

But you were content with your relationship with Aizawa

Yes he was older but you liked that about him

"Shouta I dont know how many times I have to tell you, it just isn't like that with hawks." You laughed

Aizawa clearly not seeing anything funny about about this spoke up again "You say that but clearly you've been leading him on if he doesnt even care to flirt with you even when im standing right there!" He yelled at you, "I dont want you hanging out with him."

"You're not my dad Aizawa! You cant to wll me what to do!" What started off as a little argument was turning into a full out yelling session

As it usually did whenever hawks was the subject

Aizawa was letting his insecurities speak for him and was saying words he knew he didnt mean "I dont see why you even stay with me, you like being around him so much why don't you just leave me and sleep with him already."

And feeling hurt you hurled insults back, "You know what? For once you might be right." And not wanting to sit in the apartment with him anymore you stormed out

How could he say something like that to you kept asking yourself

Why didnt he trust you?

You had never done anything to betray his trust so he really had no right

But deep down you knew you weren't so innocent

You could tell hawks to stop with a the flirting and stuff but you didnt

Just being content with it knowing it bothered Aizawa

And that wasnt right

And yes hawks was your close friend and you had to admit he was attractive and charming but you had gotten over your silly little crush for him

The moment you met Aizawa

As far as you were concerned hawks was just a friend

And thats why you found yourself venting your relationship problems to hawks tonight

The two of you were sitting on his couch alone in his apartment

As you ranted about the nights events

And as usual hawks sat there with an open ear and agreeing with you about how right you are

"I say hes cramping your style y/n,"

"You're a grown woman. He cant tell you what to do!"

"He should trust you!"

Basically telling you everything you want to hear

It was well into 2am when you finally calmed down and was seeing clearly

After a few more laughs with Hawks

"I just dont get him sometimes, if I wanted to be with you I would have just started dating you." You said with a laugh

But you notice hawks didnt seem to find that as amusing

Silence grew between you two until he spoke up

"Why didn't you?"

"Huh?"

"Why didnt you decide to date me?" He asked you

That question had been weighing on his mind since the moment he found out you were dating the eraser hero

"Keigo you know why..I...I-you're a player. And you never take anything serious-all you would have done was hurt me."

"Thats not true." He said in a rush

Hawks was looking into your eyes, "if it was you I wouldnt do anything to hurt you...its always been like that for me."

"Keigo..." you didnt know what to say

Yes you knew he always had a little crush on you but you convinced yourself it was harmless

"Why are you telling me this now?"

"Because even he said it! Why don't you leave him y/n? Me and you we'd be perfect together we both know it."

"Keigo...I love Aizawa."

"So you dont feel anything for me?"

"Its not that keigo..."

"What is it like then?"

You didnt want to tell him you didnt love him because secretly you knew a part of you did

But still

"I should leave." You said getting up and heading for the door

Keigo followed you, "y/n dont go."

He stoppes you before you were out the door, "look im sorry, I...I.. just love you y/n and I just hate seeing you with him..."

You turned around to face him sighing and trying to avoid his gaze "I dont know what you expect me to do keigo im with Aizawa..."

"I know," keigo moved his hand to your face to make you look at him, "but just for a second imagine you were with me."

And before you knew it keigos lips were on yours

You knew better then to kiss him back

But that didnt stop you

And since you didnt reject him, keigo took that as a sign to deepen it

You don't know how long you stood there kissing him

But when you felt his hands start to explode your body

It brought you back to reality

You pulled away realizing what you had done, "I cant do this." And before keigo could stop you

You left

You returned home that night to find Aizawa awake and waiting on you

"Did you go to see him?" He asked

And sighing you told him the truth or at least part of it, "Yes, I did."

"Y/n-"

"Look im sorry," you spoke up, "I should consider how you feel. Its not right for me to let him flirt, ok im sorry Aizawa it won't happen again."

You tell him trying to hold back tears as the guilt ate away at you

Aizawa's face softens as he looked and you and moved to hold you in his arms

"I was wrong for what I said. I know you wouldn't do anything."

His word only made you feel worst

Aizawa kissed your forehead, "lets go to bed."

And so you planned to keep what you did to yourself

You kept a distance from Hawks not knowing how to interact with him from then on

And all this did was hurt him

Keigo missed you

You were his bestfriend and the love of his life but now you were avoiding him

And worst he still had to see you with another man

And it drove him crazy

And to an extent it drove you crazy too

He was your bestfriend too, and you didnt know how to talk to him anymore

And Aizawa had no idea about what you had done

That is until one day when hes watching eri and she tells him

"Are you and y/n not together anymore?"

Aizawa frowned, "No. Why do you say that?"

"Cause, shes likes hawks." She said idly "I heard her say she kissed him."

Aizawa stared at her

Did she know what she was saying?

"When was this?" He asked

"She said it on the phone to her friend. When she was watching me."

Aizawa was at a lost, because he believed eri, cause why would she lie?

Aizawa didnt want to admit it but the idea of it being true

Broke his heart

He was in love with you, but you wanted someone else

Plus you lied you said nothing happened

So with this new knowledge Aizawa went to confront you that night when you two were home

"Eri told me something interesting..."

"Oh yeah?" You asked not really paying attention

"She said you-you kissee Hawks...is this true."

You snapped your head at him

And if it wasn't that it was definitely your silence that confirmed it

"Y/n...why?" He asked you

And you could hear the pain in his voice

And it made you hate yourself knowing you caused this, "I'm so sorry."

A part 2? Maybe? Let me know

[skipps-writes-for-gojo-satoru]

I'm not sure Gojo has ever even shown an interest to any girls.

He calls Utahime weak and teases her by making fun of her, essentially- which she hates. Mei Mei is incredibly strong and beautiful, and Gojo acknowledges her skill but that's it. I also noticed that in the anime (the manga doesn't have honorifics, so please correct me if I'm wrong) but he calls her Mei-san rather than Mei Mei. Therefore, I don't think he ever tried to get much closer to her than the interactions we've seen. When she asks him if he'd comfort her if she cried, he tells her that's she strong- she wouldn't cry. I thought it was interesting that while Mei Mei's question was slightly flirty, Gojo answered so simply, without any teasing.

He calls Shoko by her first name, which is understandable since they spend more time together being in the same grade. He realizes that her ability is rare and useful, but like with Utahime and Mei Mei he doesn't go any further than that. He mostly speaks to her about work related things and doesn't flirt or tease much at all.

Honestly, I think Gojo actually respects his female colleagues and mostly pokes fun at Utahime because she's so uptight and strict. Shoko and Mei Mei are more relaxed and self-assured, and Gojo recognizes their skills and compliments them for it rather than teasing them. I doubt Gojo really thinks Utahime is truly weak more than he just loves riling her up. Other than that, Gojo's pretty respectful.

Also, in the Hidden Inventory arc, Gojo was bombarded with screaming from all the girls excited to see him. Other than pulling his shades down so they could see his face- after they asked him to, btw- he didn't really do much else. He didn't even react much to the teacher giving him her phone number. His only comment was "what a fun school," and it's interesting to see that while lots of girls do appreciate his looks, he acts only mildly amused.

Other than that one model as his wallpaper, we don't really see Gojo flirt or show interest with anyone. He only really teases Utahime to piss her off- I suspect he hates how much she follows the rules like Nanami does, who he teases often as well. He likely just enjoys annoying people so stern because rules just don't sit well with him (especially because of what those "rules" had done to Geto).

It's just a possibility, but he could be one of those guys who's more interested in work than pleasure- I know, he's handsome, but not all handsome people are players and cheaters. I think that's a horrible stigma and a lot of attractive people irl are judged and criticized solely for their looks. People make too many assumptions on someone just based on their genes, and I think it's pretty shallow to think Gojo's a womanizer just because he's attractive. And he knows he's attractive- but when did being confident in yourself make you a philanderer? Gojo has never used his looks manipulatively at all.

It's definitely a possibility that he would be a womanizer, but I'd say it's unlikely based in what we've seen. To sum it all up, Gojo doesn't show interest in anyone. He teases Utahime often, likely for the same reason be teases Nanami- they're too uptight. Shoko and Mei Mei are both incredibly skilled and beautiful sorcerers, and he does acknowledge and compliment them for it, but he doesn't tease or flirt with them. He's respectful, and he works with them as his colleagues. He didn't get distracted by the teen girls fawning over him either, or suddenly get overtly cocky or show off, only sliding his glasses down so they could see his face, and even then he acted only mildly amused. Also, when Miwa asked him for a picture, he didn't even stay and chat with her or anything (I know she's a minor, but if he truly was a womanizer, he would have at least stayed to hear her compliment him or anything to feed his ego) Maybe ask her "Oh, you want a picture with me? The strongest? How cute~" A flirty comment, a joke, something to fuel his own ego, but he doesn't do that. He doesn't act in a way that conveys he openly pursues attention from women. He just takes the picture with her and walks off casually.

Therefore, other than the fact that he's handsome- and I know many people who would assume things about someone based on their attractiveness, which is a terrible stereotype- Gojo doesn't show much interest in flirting at all. He could be the type of guy who works more than plays- and there's plenty of guys who are handsome but aren't super interested in playing around. Being handsome doesn't automatically mean he's the type to sneak around and have affairs here and there. It's completely realistic for a handsome man to be uninterested in any kind of relationships- not all men are sex crazed, and being a tease to his friends doesn't make Gojo a flirt either. Teasing your friends is perfectly normal.

Therefore, Gojo being a 28 year old virgin is totally possible- not everyone's a sex crazed teen who only thinks about what's between their legs, and basing it on what normal Japanese teens do is unfair. Neither Gojo or his lifestyle is exactly normal, and there's definitely barriers when it comes to experiencing normal youth activities for Gojo's generation- especially Gojo's generation. Yuji's generation definitely has more freedom to do fun things because of what Gojo has done to give the youth more freedom- things he hasn't been able to experience himself in his youth, like playing baseball during the exchange event. That was the first time they ever did something different to tradition, and that was only because of Gojo's consideration.

Gojo's youth was filled with blood, exorcising, and choosing between life and death. The deaths Yuji and co. witnessed were what Gojo experienced as well, if not worse. Gojo's task in his youth was to protect the weak, and he found that burdensome. At least, until Geto betrayed them, and Gojo realized the new burden he had to bear in changing the Jujutsu world because of what it had done to his only best friend.

There are definitely more important things in Gojo's mind than just losing his virginity, like saving people and choosing who to save, whether he should kill or not kill.

Gojo is the strongest, but he also bears the biggest burden- and that burden is something he chose to bear, and being the strongest is something he chose to be. Because before Geto left, it was "We are the Strongest." Now, Gojo worked tirelessly so that he could say "I am the Strongest."

And that's not something you can do while sleeping around. I think a lot of people fail to recognize just how hard Gojo works for himself and others. They just think, oh he's the strongest, so it should be easy for him. But it's really, really not that simple, is it? Especially when you have to do it on your own, and even then Gojo realizes that his strength alone isn't enough to save people. He can't save everyone by himself- It's not enough for just him to be the Strongest, so he works diligently to build and inspire his students to stand with him.

He's actually a very deep and emotional man who cares about his students and especially, even now, his best friend. Everything he does is for their sake- he sacrifices the normal life he could have lived, like Nanami had done, for their sake. And he fights with the higher ups, takes the brunt of their ire, and laughs it off, acting as if he fine, like a dad pretending he's superman for his kid's sake. But Gojo is burdened, and he's tired, and he hardly sleeps, and he has the most missions- he's the Strongest, which means everyone needs him, and he bears it.

Sorry for ranting again tho. I think I went into two different topics lol oops- 🤔

OUR SAVIOR 🤔 EDUCATING PEOPLE pay attention ya'll another thing I've noticed in the latest episode is that in his phone contacts he actually writes Utahime's name properly like formally no emojis or teasing shit he actually sees them as his colleagues people he can rely on his field of work and yes about the whole thing when he bursted into riko's class man was absolutely clueless just silent as a teacher tries to give him his number. I'm pretty sure as a child Gojo wasn't allowed to attend public schools due him being in danger or putting others in danger so he doesn't know much about public schools or normal people in general since he spends all his time with people from the jujutsu society.

That is definitely true just because someone is good looking that doesnt mean he's some cheap womanizer. I see a lot of people shipping him and Utahime together which is understandable ship who you like but I don't think Gojo as any ulterior motives like wooing Utahime by teasing her he just is plainly teasing ya know like friends do but in this case Utahime hates his guts and he doesnt know. I mean it takes some amount of hate to try to throw hot tea at someone 😂

While certainly I agree Gojo's teen like wasn't the best it was like he literally had a full time job at that age but who's to stay he didn't go messing around one time? I'm sure during his teen days he wanted to experience things he didnt get to to but now could because he lives on his own now. But maybe he didnt at all who knows? Which also raises another question, I wonder if he has any romantic experiences? And this was all before what happened in the hidden inventory arc after that I can see him more becoming invested in his duty and with what happened with geto as well would of definitely had a huge impact on him to try harder even though hes the strongest so that the next generation wouldn't have to experience the things he went through.

It's really sad if you really think about it what hes been through and what he has to shoulder all while keeping the facade that he's okay, I bet there were times he cursed his powers and his life....but he bears with it anyways because everyone is counting on him....

And don't be sorry at all! I am actually really learning alot about Gojo from you. Please continue to tell us your thoughts and feelings. I don't mind at all ❤ and thank you for taking the time to write 💕

[mde1011]

when i got into the dsmp i started a note and wrote down any quotes or moments i thought were funny, and im bored at 3 am so enjoy some of them

how is being arrested real? just walk away!!!”

⁃ “once an american always an american. go...go protests masks...or something”

⁃ “...yEAH BUT DID YOU HAVE WAP” “what’s...whats wap?” “...WORSHIP AND PRAYER”

⁃ “HOW DO YOU LIKE POLITICS MOTHERFUCKER”

⁃ “i’m naked” “...no you’re not” “i can be...”

⁃ “uhhhh i’m in a high stress situation....i deal with these poorly”

⁃ “i should go first i’m naked”

⁃ “yEAHHHH WE KILLED AN OLD MAN WITH HEART PROBLEMS”

⁃ “what are you going to do?” “i...have no idea i think i’m gonna start out by punching a tree”

⁃ “tOmmy...did i just hear you say shit ass looking mofo?”

⁃ “i aM gOinG to gEt nAkeD to iNtiMidAtE HiM”

- “...i want freedom !” “you want BALLS.”

⁃ “...down the line. yeah that’s where we discover the art of cannibalism” “oh it’s an art?” “it’s an art”

⁃ “oh there’s some logs here. wonder what they’re saying to me. uh huh. uh huh. oh yeah that’s very racist” “tommy you gotta burn those logs.” “burn ‘em before they spread their racism to other logs”

⁃ “are you pooing?” “*whisper* i’m charging up-““ “he’s ejaculating on the tent.” “he’s WHAT?”

⁃ “he’s sPEEDING. LOOK HOW FAST HES GOING” “i’ve taken so many drugs. someone tell badboyhalo”

⁃ “we should make a pact. and that pact is, uh, we make a book...and in that book...we declare that saying ‘muffin’ is a, is a slur”

⁃ “i was thinking what if one day your bladder just,,,,stopped working.....AGGGFFFFF i was tHINKING ABOUT THAT THE OTHER DAY IVE GOT TO PREPARE IVE GOT YO PREPARE thisiswhydiapersaintthatbad”

⁃ <sapnap> i think i was ordered to um

<tommyinnit> boobed

<sapnap> kill you

<tommyinnit> boobs

<sapnap> if this happens

<tommyinnit> think about boobs man

<sapnap> tsk tsk tommy

<tommyinnit> iM DISGRUNTLED

⁃ “why is this deadman so good at making drugs”

⁃ “i just learnt that a girl hero is called a heroine and it freaked me out”

⁃ “memento memento me-“ “that’s actually the worst word i know so you can’t keep saying that” “oh, really.....? have you ever heard the term ‘racist’?”

⁃ “the person who invented the phrase ‘be yourself’ hadn’t met you!”

⁃ “you seem like the type of guy whose dad would throw him overboard as a joke but he would just drown”

⁃ “shout out to dream for twerking!”

⁃ “let’s talk......let’s talk about sex” “wonderful. what do you think about sex, lazarbeam?” “i ain’t saying SHIT in front of a sixteen year old”

⁃ “what the- i think i’m seeing things” “....tommy i told you not to drink the sea water” “well i DID drink the sea water because it TOLD ME TO”

⁃ “it’s like the movie when that guy gets stranded on an island and has sex with a coconut” “whAT?? dream- dream, you vastly misinterpreted this” “it one hundred percent does”

⁃ “oh mastICATE.....isn’t that when a fish turns inside out?”

⁃ “what are some bad words YOU know, clay?” “i don’t-“ “what about ‘terrorist’?”

⁃ “my mind has to be on the same frequency as jesus when he walked on water”

⁃ “you wanna know why i was late?” “no i really do-“ “i was having a MASSIVE poo. really just a HUGE poo”

⁃ “jUST CUZ YOU TALK ABOUT POO ONCE AND THEN YOU SEE A BIG GREEN BASTARD AMD YOUR LIFE IS FLASHING BEFORE YOUR EYES AND THEN YOU CANT REMEMBER- YOU CANT REMEMBER IF IT WAS YESTERDAY OR TOMORROW YOU HURT THAT WOMAN”

⁃ “i love america. mmmmm patriotism

⁃ “LIFE IS NOT A HAPPY SONG KERMIT THE FROG”

⁃ “please stop taking the cock”

⁃ “two four six eight who do we appreciate? not the government let’s gooooooo”

⁃ “oooo look at the dogs😍” “wHAAAAAT. WHAT. THERES ACTUALLY LIKE. A MILLION DOGS HERE. WHAT THE HELL.”

⁃ “yeahhhhh bitch i stab- i don’t stab women-“ “woooooooah tommy you stab women?” “heyyyy sapnap”

⁃ “do you know what happens whne you reach the top of the ladder? there’s only one place to go.” “.....side to side😨” “down.” “...i really thought you were gonna say side to side🥺”

⁃ “one last time.” “just like in hamilton😓”

⁃ “you don’t know how many times i’ve mistaken trees for hot women”

⁃ “ i don’t feel better i just destroyed penis”

⁃ “i’ve never seen a snail with bad morals”

⁃ “awwwwwwww😢 i’m doin’ drugs🤧 just like the good ol’ days😓” “.....define the ‘good old days’” “back when i did drugs”

⁃ “have you ever fought a baby? i have and it was trivially easy to defeat, phil.”

⁃ “the only other i egg i know about was the one i learnt about in school....not allowed to say which one....”

⁃ “did you know one of my new years resolutions is to be more like 2010 justin bieber?”

⁃ “apparently cats don’t lay eggs”

⁃ “thinking about trees- if i saw a tree with a beard mmmmmm...holy shit id hit it”

⁃ “we’re in hell dude. science doesn’t matter here”

⁃ “i cant die i cant die i’m GOD”

⁃ “hey pig your letter is the same as pussy, hmm?”

⁃ “are we cool are we COOL guys? CRYSTAL COOL like CRYSTAL METH”

⁃ “he- he’s crying because - because i killed his mother isn’t that right? mother dearest mother deadest mother gonest”

⁃ “bro ive been drinking since i was six and let me tell you...it’s not good to be drinking that young. led to some poor life decisions when i was 8” “what did you do” “i cant say” “...who did you hurt” “....only myself”

⁃ “je suis” “ay i know what that mean you prick” “what does it mean” “it means you’re racist dickhead”

⁃ “i’d never poo in the presence of a women- which is why i’m scared to get a girlfriend i think i’d just explode”

⁃ “biff tannen is one of my idols”

⁃ “black widow died and i thought ‘wow it should’ve been the man’ because he’s a man”

⁃ “there’s a character called captain america and i think he’s stupid”

⁃ “i’m a GOOD LAD i’ve got GOOD MORALS and if i’ve DONE SOMETHING WRONG it WASNT MY FAULT I JUST GOT A LITTLE EXCITED”

⁃ “sam....what’s the longest you’ve ever wiped your arse? for me it’s 48 minutes”

⁃ “why are you standing in the shitter?” “....that’s a SINK” “uhhh welllll” “hAVE YOU SHAT IN THE SINK?????”

⁃ “you’re like a living ghost” “...i think that’s called a human, tubbo”

⁃ “maybe i accidentally kill ranboo and we just never see him again *laughs* ay? and then i go ‘april foooools!!!’ and then i kill their child. i kill him”

⁃ “you built a penis” “it’s a PENIS OF SAFETY”

⁃ “i saw the penis of safety and i pressed mouse button four my friend”

⁃ “the penis on the other side of the river is larger” “ive heard that before....”

⁃ “you’ve turned the penis into a wall” “a wall of safety is better than a penis of safety” “i think the penis was better”

⁃ “if you wanna make a penis i know where we can make a penis and i know how big we can make it”

⁃ “i don’t conceptualize death but i think i just saw it!”

⁃ “yeah i- yeah i know i’m- my first impression on eret was making him read a shrek fan fiction so- i’m not one for first impressions”

⁃ “i-i’m scared for him- i’m scared OF him. yknow the first thing he did when he saw me was imMEDIATELY strip down then jump off then immediately die?”

⁃ “where are you?” “getting stabbed, one second”

⁃ “you’ve seen the joker?” “yea-“ “i resonate a lot with that man” “...oH. oh. that’s- that’s not-“

⁃ “he bURNT DOWN MY HOUSE” “out of LOVE”

⁃ “ohhhh my god stop making me play with the neighbor kid” “o-okay if you don’t go play with him i’m kicking you out of the house-“ “wHAT THE FUCK???”

⁃ “there’s a STRIP CLUB” “oh yeah for wood!” “are you into strippers?” “i mean all it does is make the wood look different so....yeah it doesn’t really do much”

⁃ “no no we have categories, we have the poo-saster- you might have to take a shower after-“ “no, no i’m gonna stop you right there”

⁃ “as i was saying you can have a 1-to-3 wiper, that’s an A-tier poo, my friend”

⁃ “i want you to eat your sock”

⁃ “you know i’m a child- i’m a minor” “sO AM I DICKHEAD”

⁃ “everyone is calling you dresus” “yeah i am”

⁃ “ayyyy ayyyy los DROGAS LOS DROGAS” “no no big q- she’s thirteen- how does this happen with every 13 year old girl you meet?”

⁃ “my poo has muscles like i do”

⁃ “i cant hear the words among us without crying they’ll say there are aliens among us and in the back youll just hear me *choking noises*”

⁃ “tubbo...tubbo is like...tubbo is like mary” “.....did you just call me the Virgin Mary?”

⁃ “i’m just saying, have you ever seen me and jesus in the same room?”

⁃ “do you smoke sam” “all the time”

⁃ “i thought you were talking about the- the speeeeed drug”

⁃ “have you ever sold drugs to kids sam?” “......no”

⁃ “we can’t let the girlboss rule because she will gatekeepe my feelings” “that would not be good”

⁃ “THEY DIDNT INVITE ME TO KILL ME???? NOW I HAVE FOMO”

⁃ “you have obviously taken part in scientology-“ “i have not-“ “you’ve donated to tom cruises cult shit”

⁃ “....am i worse than david dobrik?” “are- are we worse than david dobrik?” “oh- oh god”

⁃ “he has broke one of the rules of the hit best seller ‘the bible’- this kind of looks like a cock”

⁃ “well i’ve moved now, KING”

⁃ “what is an angsty teen and am i one? because when i USED to hang out with my friends they use the word angst a lot”

⁃ “yeah yeah yeah i bench”

⁃ “sam i think i’m angsty i think i’m an angsty tik tok teen looking for a community to help me out”

⁃ “i don’t think you’ve followed the train of logic all the way-“ “there’s a TRAIN INVOLVED????????”

⁃ “i’m like the orange fucker from that animated rom com”

⁃ “i’m under the influence of big cock”

⁃ “it’s meeee big cock man”

⁃ “i cant look away” “sam please use your twitter alt for this” “he’s horny on maaaainnnnn” “and what’s wrong with that?” “.......”

⁃ “you’re a FUCKING IDIOT” “IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT, BIG COCK”

⁃ “i’m gonna call you ‘cockity’ big cock” “sHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP-“

⁃ “STOP LOOKING AT IT” “ITS SO VIBRANT”

⁃ “at least this guy doesn’t have a cock-“ “itS NOT A COCK” “horny on main jesus-“

⁃ “is that a cock” “SHUT THE FUCK UP”

⁃ “.....i wanna see the inside of it again do a split”

⁃ “okay sam-“ “tommy that guy wants your cock-“ “no- no he doesn’t sam”

⁃ “sam, sam and i need you to hear this....dont. act. up.” “i don’t act up-“ “you were acting up-“ “i-“ “you were caught in 8k.” “but- but we both agree it’s not a tie-“

⁃ “please don’t tell me to kill cockity i am overwhelmed”

⁃ “why is there an anus in my tie?”

⁃ “what are the legal implications of this?” “...i mean besides hell you’re good”

⁃ “whatre the legal implications?” “i mean usually that’s a no-no but today, today it’s fine” “yeahhh lets go murder his family”

⁃ “i’d be an antivax landlord”

⁃ “jesus never does drugs” “well- well you turned water into wine king and wine is alcohol”

⁃ “can you put on pants i can’t- i cant stop looking at it- sorry tommy i know you said-“ “yeah sam i know you tried-“

⁃ “you know i fuck with satan”

⁃ “i’m sorry jesus lucifer is just such a good man-“ “oh you- hold me BACK FROM THIS FUCKER HOLD ME BACK ILL SEND HIM TO HELL YOU LIKE HELL-“

⁃ “are you jesus or just a man who grew a beard and put on a suit?”

⁃ “even the guy with his cock out is telling you to stop-“ “oh jesus, and i mean jesus-“ “shUT THE FUCK UP MAN”

⁃ “the best best way to slander him is to stop his offspring; we need to kick him the balls.....no? not a good....? alright us four each take a ball-“

⁃ “......why did jesus give him four scrotums man🙁🙁”