#i read something a while back that was like 'only listen to critique from ppl who are actually going to spend energy helping you change'

[aeide-thea]

like i guess i'm just. thinking a bunch lately about what our various socmed conversations are achieving. like what does Condemning Things Online actually materially accomplish wrt the moral causes we care about. if you didn't already know that eg serious active complicity with the military-industrial complex was worth trying to avoid (even as all american taxpayers are in some less-active sense complicit), is public shaming by the twitterati actually going to belatedly teach you that. (or is it just going to make you retreat further into private spaces that don't challenge yr complicity.) and what is our setting ourselves up in superior judgment as a punitive mob doing to our psyches in the meantime.

like. idk. shaming ana m*rdoll off the internet changes literally nothing about l*ckheed m*rtin's impact on the world, is the thing. it does mean xie no longer has a pulpit from which to dispense dubious moral punditry, but like. if we spent half as much energy cultivating a little healthy skepticism wrt this sort of self-appointed moral influencer as we've collectively spent whipping one another up into Righteously Condemnatory Mob Fury, we'd be saving ourselves from them AND from the next hypocritical grifter—because there's always going to be another one. (and then maybe we'd have some energy left over to throw at the actual MIC issue, and not just at this symbol of it.)

anyway this is just. some muddled thoughts. but i guess it just does feel to some extent like a lot of Internet Outrage is a performative circlejerk that doesn't benefit the non-online causes we supposedly care about even a little bit—it's just scapegoating someone and then getting the catharsis of driving them out, without actually earning that catharsis by accomplishing anything actively positively beneficial.

[cursedzucchini]

You know what? Fuck it

DC x DP prompt #3

I think at least lmao.

Anyway! Jason starts making videos on YouTube for one reason or another (is really stressed, no one listens to his rants Abt books who cares). His content is mostly bad books he read or really really really long rants Abt pride and prejudice. Like 3 hours on one tiny detail he noticed on his 214th read through.

He's kinda popular, mostly bc his terrible books videos. He talks Abt the ones that made him the most mad, which coincidentally are mostly romance and supernatural. Like he's one of the well known figures in the supernatural romance critique group (whcih is pretty small, but well). (Also he doesn't show his face on camera, bc secret identity and stuff, it's just his voice over a video of something mundane, like the sky or a room in which is a fly or something)

And now this can go two ways, that i can think of (w dead on main in mind at least)

1) one day Jason finds a book which is supernatural romance and is actually good. It has a kidna cliche system for the supernatural stuff, but with a refreshing twist. The characters have depts and flaws, yet are still very likable. The plot is actually interesting and overall the story's theme is death, not belonging anywhere and overall stuff that is very close to Jason's heart. The story doesn't shy away from violence and it is suprisingly accurate.

(I'm.gonna reblog this w pretty long idea of what this book could be Abt, bc i don't wanna annoy ppl lol)

Anyway Jason kinda falls in love w it, and it becomes famous for being the first novel Jason rated positively or something.

Meanwhile Danny, who was told by jazz writing is good way to get his feeling out, and just wanted to make a quick buck, is really fucking confused how tf did his book become so popular and who tf is this nerd who rates books for a living.

(basically big fan Jason and suspicious/awkward Danny lmao)

2) there is a famous series on Jason profile. It's the worst fucking series he ever read and it's just fucking awful. All the characters are fucking terrible, always going on and on about one thing, the romance sucks in a way that isnt even funny. Jason would love to believe some wrote this as a joke, if it wasn't for the absolute cringefest this was, and it wasn't a whole ass series!! Like who writes 12 books for a joke?

Danny ducking Fenton that's who. Dude was so ducking annoyed at his rogues, he threatened them w writing a terrible romance novels abt them. The ghosts, knowing his terrible grade in literature backed off for a moment, before someone crossed the line. And write Danny did. It was the worst thing he had ever written, the love interest was perfect caricature yet still faithfully go the original. And Danny, because fuck them he lost sommuch sleep over that one prank, decided to publish it. (The book was pretty thin so it didn't take that much time writing it). Unfortunately it became immensely popular in the infinite realm. So the ghosts started crossing lines on purpose. Before Danny figured it out, he had already published his fifth book and was writing another three. After some bargaining, getting a book written Abt them as a piece of shit love interest became a reward.

And while yeah, he had to say his writing was terrible and the books sucked, some small part of him was kinda proud y'know? Like a mother of her twelve ugly as fuck toddlers.

So when he saw some nerd on the internet not only shit talk his book, but also get money of it?

Danny decided to haunt him (just like his books did him, now that everyone knew Abt them thanks to this guy)

(enemies (sorta it's not that serious tho) to lovers ala terrible writer Danny who hates his books and kinda famous YouTuber hasn't who also hates Danny's books)

--

Fuck this is way too long wtf. Anyway imma reblog this w 1) book idea. Might add whatever i think the twelve books could be Abt. Pls if u want to add anything to this pls do!!

[scarlet--wiccan]

hi again. i was wondering if you would know anything about sina grace's iceman and why some people seem to despise that title and sina grace. once i asked someone and they told me they have a problem with daken's characterization but i don't get the hate to sina and the title as a whole. of course people have the right to be mad and not like things but i thought we liked sina? and idk why we should hate sina? did he do something?

I wanna start off by saying that I do like Sina, and I try really hard to show him solidarity and support. He had a really difficult time working for Marvel, and while this isn’t indicative of every LGBT person’s experience at the company, I do think it’s representative of corporate culture and mainstream publishing in general. He’s been pretty outspoken about his experience with Marvel, and I think there’s been backlash from both the company and the readership.

The reader backlash started wayyy before that post came out, though. I would say that there was a certain amount of negative anticipation for Iceman (2017). Homophobic readers were upset that the character was gay, while less-homophobic readers were upset because his outing was handled really poorly in X-Men. When Sina’s book first launched, it not only brought out that homophobic element, it also drew a critical eye from LGBT readers.

It seemed to me that a lot of LGBT readers felt that Bobby’s voice was too campy or stereotypical in Sina’s writing, and I can’t help but feel like that attitude was born from internalized homophobia... or even just straight up homophobia.The fact is that self-professed allies and even other members of the LGBT community harbor a lot of disgust for gay men and AMAB ppl, particularly if we behave in a way that’s stereotypical or obtrusive. There’s nothing outrageously flamboyant or femme about Sina’s Iceman-- quite the opposite, actually. But Sina makes space in Bobby’s world for true-to-life forays into gay culture and community, and some folks really seemed to think that was too much. It was hokey, for sure, but that kinda-embarrassing humor is really in line with Iceman’s character. 

I’m not going to act like this was Iceman’s only critique, or even the most prominent, but it was weirdly pervasive. There are definitely some technical problems I could point out-- I think Sina has problems with pacing and scene transitions, but if I’m being honest it’s an issue that I’ve noticed with a lot comics in the last couple years so it might just be some kind of shift in popular writing/editing styles that I don’t personally like. 

The portrayal of Daken is definitely a huge problem in Iceman (2017). Throughout Sina’s X-men work, Daken appears not only as a villain, but a predator who willingly endangers children. Daken has always been a bad guy, and that’s fine, but it’s high time he stopped being portrayed as duplicitous, hyper-sexual, and predatory. It’s a legitimately harmful and offensive way to depict bi and gay men, especially men of color. Back in 2017, Daken was also appearing in Tom Taylor’s Wolverine, a book which afforded him a more positive and humanizing characterization. There was a major discrepancy between the two, and fans noticed right away. A lot of Daken fans not only resent Sina for doing the him dirty, but for undermining what could have been a real turning point for the character. The fact that this poor characterization returned in Winter’s End, which was a single-issue special that Sina penned in 2019, showed that Sina somehow failed to hear or listen to those criticisms, which definitely pissed me off.

So, those are my thoughts on what makes Iceman and Sina Grace so polarizing in the X-Men fandom. There are a lot of things about these books that I like, and there have been plenty of positive critical responses. There are also a lot of other interesting ideas and choices to examine in Sina’s writing and I really wish fandom had given Iceman more time and effort. It’s been a long time since I’ve read it, and you’ve definitely inspired me to do a re-read.

[tiredbiostudent]

how I take university notes as a science student

essentially, my system can be broken into three parts:

1. Before the lecture: read over slides (if posted) + do readings (and take rough notes if necessary). tbh I only do this if I have time and if readings are required.

2. During lecture: take down notes on everything important that isn’t written on the slides (granted this only works if your prof posts their lectures). you can go back to the slides later! some examples of notes I take: when the prof stresses the importance of a concept, detailed explanations, notes to my future self for clarity. essentially, things that best explain the slides and will best help me to understand the material. this method is super effective because I (usually) spend most of the time listening to the professor and engaging with the lecture, as opposed to trying to frantically write down everything on the slide- I’m definitely an audio-visual learner, so this works well for me! tips: shortform (e.g. environment = env), drawings (arrows to indicate increase; diagrams), leaving a blank line in between different slides to keep it somewhat organized. distinguishing what’s important and concepts to focus on takes some time to get good at, but ultimately it’ll help you get the most out of lecture. 

3. After lecture: as soon as I can, I write my “good copy” of the note. I try to do it while the lecture is still fresh in my mind since I have a pretty bad memory (if I put it off, I tend to come back to my rough notes and have no idea what I was trying to say to myself lmao). my good copy consists of: what was written on the slides plus my notes that explain and enhance the content. I’ll also add in notes from readings if applicable. something that took me awhile to realize is that YOUR NOTES ARE FOR YOU. don’t just take notes to take notes- think about their ultimate purpose (i.e. usually, providing organized content to study from). and there’s no point in doing them a certain way you think you should if it isn’t benefiting your understanding of the material- create notes that will best help you study for tests and remember the content. explain concepts the way you’ll understand them. analogies and associations are particularly helpful!

I usually have my rough notes and good notes side by side, and follow along w the rough notes as I go through the slides on my laptop.

you can also add in a note outline, summary, list of terms, etc. anything that is helping you synthesize, relate and comprehend what is being taught!!!

Pros -you’re engaging with the material multiple times, which better helps you to remember it -writing out notes is also an effective way to retain content- when typing out notes, I didn’t process the lecture at all. I find it also helps clarify concepts and brings everything together so I /get/ it. -related to that, when you incorporate your own notes into the professor’s, it’s like your explaining the material to yourself and that’s such a 10/10 way to retain and understand the lecture. that being said tho, it’s important not to veer too far from what’s written on the slides bc often that’s exactly what the prof tests you on. -you’re paying attention in class and not focused on /getting everything down/ -writing out notes makes it way easier on future you: a completed resource to study from + you already generally understand and recall things. -it’s nice to only have to carry a notebook and pen to lecture! saves ur back -for the record I’m lazy and a procrastinator sooooooo when I ultimately end up not studying for an important midterm, I’m usually okay since I’ve already done all this work with the material :p (that being said u should definitely study sdfjkfdsh) -no offense to laptop people but all that typing in class can be pretty distracting. I know when I had to type notes I couldn’t stop cringing at how loud it was. also literally 70% of the ppl who sit in front of me text and do random stuff on their laptops during lecture and it’s SOOOOO distracting (I mean I have add and I’m nosy & like reading ppl’s conversations but-)

Cons -it’s sooo time-consuming. generally takes me about the same time as the lecture to write the good copy note out (i.e. 1hr lecture = 1hr writing comprehensive note), but I have classes that can go way past that ‘:) -ngl I’m prone to doodling during lecture -I’m a perfectionist and I’m always so tempted to write down every. single. thing that could possibly be important (even tho it’s the most menial detail everything) -wasteful? since I use a lot of notebooks and pens. -writing is slower than typing, and sometimes in a fast-paced lecture it’s hard to get everything down + read the slides to see what the prof is saying that isn’t there

let me know if this was helpful at all or if you have any suggestions/comments/critiques! thanks for reading ik it got long haha <3

[janiedean]

“I like age gaps in ships” please fuck off

Bruce Springsteen’s Youngstown is a song originally written for his 1995 record The Ghost of Tom Joad, which won a grammy award for best new folk album and, going back to 1982′s Nebraska, picks up again on the subject of discussing social matters in the modern era United States.

Originally written as an acoustic piece, Youngstown was inspired by reading Dale Maharidge’s frankly great book (that all of tumblr should read) Journey to Nowhere: The Saga of the New Underclass, whose first four chapters are indeed focused on the saga of the town of Youngstown, Ohio, once famous for having been the most important steel producer in the United States before the mills got shut down in the late seventies/early eighties therefore bringing the city’s economy to a collapse and the unemployment rate/poverty rate to skyrocket, and therefore creating a whole new bunch of newly poor people who, in lack of skills other than manual work (in the book one of the workers says that 20% of his colleagues in the mills couldn’t even read or write, and tbqh I’d like to know if most of tumblr dot com wouldn’t help the world by getting angry that there’s such a high illiteracy degree in the US rather than at most stuff ppl on tumblr get angry about), hopped on a car with their family (or on a train on their own) and left for either Texas (where they’d be discriminated based on the Ohio license plates) or California to pick fruit (in pure Steinbeck fashion).

In this essay, I will explain you why Youngstown has some of the best lyrics ever written at least by Springsteen and how it’s a gem of a song that would eat for breakfast 99% of what people like on this godforsaken website like, while at the same time managing to join great storytelling with actual activism as it was about an issue that people feel so strongly about that they ignored it for years before then getting surprised when blue-collar workers went for Trump because he promised change.

Now, on to the lyrics!

The song opens with:

Here in northeast Ohio, back in eighteen-o-threeJames and Danny Heaton found the ore that was lining Yellow CreekThey built a blast furnace here along the shoreAnd they made the cannon balls that helped the Union win the war

This opening already shows why Springsteen is an extremely good lyricist, as in four simple lines we already learn all the backstory we need to know to have an idea of what’s up with Youngstown even if we aren’t from the US or know nothing about it anyway: we know where it is, we know when the steel producing started (1803) and who started it (James and Danny Heaton) and why (because there was ore in the area). Then we establish that everyone works with blast furnaces, the key to the entire song, and then we immediately link the steel factoring with their role in the wars the US fought, starting from Civil War cannonballs which helped the Union win the war therefore uniting the country.

Here in Youngstown, here in YoungstownMy sweet Jenny I’m sinking downHere darling in Youngstown

Except that from the refrain we know that things aren’t going well, since the narrator is sinking, and if we know (from the book but also from other sources) that Jenny was the nickname for one of the largest furnaces in the city, we immediately know what to expect from the rest of the song.

Going ahead:

Well my daddy worked the furnaces, kept ‘em hotter than hellI come home from ‘Nam worked my way to scarfer, a job that’d suit the devil as wellWell taconite coke and limestone fed my children and made my payThem smokestacks reaching like the arms of God into a beautiful sky of soot and clay

In the second stanza, we move on to the personal part of the song: the narrator talks about his daddy, suggesting that working in the furnaces was an hereditary job, and kept them hotter than hell, which introduces the second main theme in the song as in, the Heaven/Hell contrast which comes to fruition at the end. The narrator is a Vietnam veteran, so he’s supposedly a young man or young-ish, so the entire tradition of working in furnaces dates back a long time, and then he informs us that his job would suit the devil as well, connecting again with the fire/hell/hot imagery, which of course is not original but it’s immediately effective in this context, especially linked to blast furnaces.

The narrator then goes on to the economical discussion, as in, he fed his children and made his pay with the materials that go into making steel, taconite, coke and limestone, which is a rather poetic way of putting it, which keeps on in the hauntingly beautiful next line which is honestly a work of art: them smokestacks reaching like the arms of God (biblical image where God is again brought up in contrast to the previous Hell-ish immagery) into a beautiful sky of soot and clay (where we have a in-built contrast because soot and clay are not words associated with beautiful and actually soot = dirt = ugliness) suggests in a simple but haunting line how such a less than gratifying job is seen by these people as something to be proud of which creates beauty as he feeds their family and allows them to pay the bills.

Again, we have the refrain which suggests us that in Youngstown things aren’t going well, until the bridge goes into:

Well my daddy come on the Ohio works when he come home from World War TwoNow the yard’s just scrap and rubble, he said “Them big boys did what Hitler couldn’t do.”Yeah these mills they built the tanks and bombs that won this country’s warsWe sent our sons to Korea and Vietnam, now we’re wondering what they were dying for

This stanza is another proof of how Springsteen can manage to pack a lot of information into a rather short stanza without renouncing lines that drop on you like bombs ready to explode.

First, we learn that the narrator’s daddy was a WWII veteran, so there’s a direct connection in between how these people who build weapons for the US wars also fight in them (and if you read the book and know that a quarter of them couldn’t even read it’s… honestly unsettling), and then that the yard’s just scrap and rubble. “Them big boys did what Hitler couldn’t do” is lifted from a line in the book from an ex steel mill worker whose son was laid off from that exact same job and who also had fought in WWII, and proceeds to point out the severity of the situation in its haunting simplicity.

Then, we go back to the cannon balls that helped the Union win the war: since then Youngstown has built tanks and bombs that won this country’s wars along with its inhabitants but now they all closed, people are without job, the sons of the men who went to Korea and Vietnam died in there and came back to their only source of income gone, and now we’re wondering what they were dying for. Which, without saying, is implicitly but not-so-much a heavy critique of how the US government has no scruples sending men to war and then leave them to die and how the ones who survive feel betrayed when finding out they don’t even have a job anymore, or they can’t have the one job they trained for.

But it’s not over here: before the last refrain, we have:

From the Monongahela valley to the Mesabi iron rangeTo the coal mines of Appalachia, the story’s always the sameSeven hundred tons of metal a day, now sir you tell me the world’s changedOnce I made you rich enough, rich enough to forget my name

Here we went back at the beginning: the same way the first stanza told us everything we needed to know about Youngstown historically, this one tells us that Youngstown is not alone and the same economical waste and depression is to be found in all the places in the US above mentioned (Monongahela, Mesabi, Appalachia) where entire towns/counties are facing poverty because they lost their only source of income as the world changes but they’re not given the chance to change with them, because they only were trained for seven hundred tons of metal a day and now they know nothing else and so they’re told the world has moved on when they can’t move on with him.

And now we have what’s thematically the most important line of the song imo even if the next stanza is its symbolical perfect conclusion: you tell me the world’s changed once I made you rich enough, rich enough to forget my name. Here we have some vitriolic, angry criticism at the rich people who only care about their workers as long as they provide profit for them and then are ready to drop them like wasted junk the moment they’re not needed anymore and they’re rich enough to forget their name why they can’t feed their children and make their pay anymore, because of course a steel mill worker will make less than the CEO of the company selling the metal he makes or the bank taking away his house if he cannot pay for it anywhere.

Anyhow, for anyone else this would have been the climax, but since Springsteen is not the first idiot that walks by and can write a song, where anyone else would have left it there and concluded with a last refrain (same as above), he has a post-script after the refrain that ends the song without giving it the bridge-last stanza-refrain usual rock song closure:

When I die I don’t want no part of heaven, I would not do heaven’s work wellI pray the devil comes and takes me to stand in the fiery furnaces of hell

These two lines are a pure work of art in how they manage to wrap up the song by re-using thematically all the heaven/hell imagery previously established and leave the listener with an acute sense of dread.

The narrator, which before compared the smoke to the arms of God, doesn’t want to go Heaven because he wouldn’t do Heaven’s work well (let’s remember he built weapons and has fought a war, so we can assume he also is working through war-related trauma in that sense). He also prays that the devil comes and takes him which is technically an oxymoron as people don’t pray the devil (they pray to God or the angels or good entities, not to bad entities - the devil is summoned or evoked or you sell your soul to him, you don’t pray for him to come and take you), to stand in the fiery furnaces of Hell, which is the final connecting link to the before-laid-down Hell imagery and goes back to the initial furnace/hot/hell/devil imagery by giving it almost a positive spin. Indeed:

is a word that has positive connotation - strong, bright, blazing, brilliant, vivid, rich, strong, bold, passionate: same way as the workers felt about their steel mill jobs that were taken away from them and left them with a handful of nothing and struggling to make ends meet. So the ideal end is not to ascend to Heaven but to go to Hell where furnaces would be going for all eternity (furnaces only can work until they’re on and they have to be lighted up all day otherwise it takes an inane amount of money to start them again), fiery and proud, and patience if it’s Hell that’d take the narrator, because Heaven had nothing for him. And that’s why us listeners, even if not familiar with either Youngstown or its plight nor know shit about steel mills or how a blast furnaces work, at the end of the song feel upset and creeped out, because we’re put in front of a situation that’s gone to shit and where people have died and bled and worked all their life for nothing and gave themselves to wars that ultimately made the US what it is and gave it economic prosperity hoping to have their piece of the American dream and then get royally fucked and would rather go to Hell where their trade would be appreciated than ascend to Heaven like technically anyone Christian should want.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you write a damned great song that a) teaches the listeners something, b) discusses social issues within it, c) does its job of activism work as an extremely famous singer brings awareness to an issue that no politician gives a fuck about at least from what my poor Italians self can understand, d) is also not at all boring in either of its version. Actually, the original packs a punch in its quiet deliver while the electrical is just devastatingly angry and raging with that same fiery fervor described in the ending stanza, and both make an excellent job of delivering their message. Here is the original acoustic take played in Youngstown itself during the Ghost of Tom Joad tour:

Too bad that not many people on tumblr who like to pretend they’re doing activism listen to Bruce Springsteen.

Sad.

[kawaiijellymonster]

SO now that I have picked a college and all that jazz I can finally talk about my college essay which I know nobody cares about but holy shit it was so good I had such fun writing it.

When I was first learning about writing college essays it was early covid I was sitting in a zoom call with maybe 5 ppl from my grade and a guidance counselor who wasn't even my own and she said to write something different but also something that represents you and I was like "fuckkk" at first and then I sat there for a second and pulled up my notes app and jotted down "connecting Frankenstein and reviving dead parts of myself to create an intellectual and emotional person that I am now who is constantly trying to improve myself" and then I left it for like 8 months so when I came back to the essay writing I tried to have three ideas that I would write about. The first was obviously the Frankenstein one because it was the only one I had thought out, then I had one about accepting uncertainty and learning to let myself be human instead of pushing myself, and the third one was about astronomy and my dad and growth and anxiety and all that stuff.

Now one thing to know about me is that I have never read Frankenstein (lmao) but I did read "The dark descent of Elizabeth Frankenstein" and I've read enough critiques about Frankenstein that I kind of had a vibe. It's also always scientifically been interested in Frankenstein which is why it stuck out to me.

Basically, I recognize that I've grown relatively sequentially as my life changed from me who was abused and subservient, to me who coped with not being abused anymore and tried to wrap myself in narcissism like a security blanket, to the me who started actively working to better myself and think outside the box while still being kind. For me until that third version I didn't feel human I kind of felt other. So in my essay, I made a lot of allusions to being Frankenstein the creator, as well as the monster who was trying to learn what it meant to be human. All through my own experiences. Some versions of myself weren't all bad but at the same time they weren't all good either, it was a combination of traits that didn't mesh well, so with every reiteration and growth, I would try recombinations or new pieces.

Put simply, I love my intro paragraph to death and the rest is also pretty good and I spent like a month on it and I adore this essay so I needed to share it or I was gonna explode, and not that I don't trust you guys but I didn't wanna share it before my college season was over so if you're interested, keep reading to read my awesome college essay:

Who was Frankenstein, really? A madman? A genius? An irresponsible college dropout? I think what really matters is that he was a creator. In whatever form that took, and regardless of his less-than-caring attitude about his creation; he was a creator. He was also a scientist; he took a look at discarded pieces and tried to fit them together into something new, and revolutionary. I’ve always considered myself to be a little bit of Frankenstein, and a little bit of his monster. I built myself out of a series of pieces, looking through rubble and decaying trash and trying to find the parts that fit together, that make me into the person that I wanted to be. Creating the best version of myself that I possibly could.

As a kid, my father wasn’t kind. Being around him taught me to watch people and anticipate their actions. I was always Watching for that split second where teasing turned into a cruel smile and a bruise on my brother's face. When my parents divorced, I closed off. I tried not to use those parts of myself and left them to decay like excess limbs; replacing them with caustic narcissism and anti-social tendencies. If I didn’t interact with people, or if I underestimated them, then I wasn’t the girl my father created. It made me feel like a different person. However, I didn’t like this Second Version of myself. She was cruel, acting as both a god while hiding a child full of holes. I felt like Frankenstein looking at his monster, as horror filled his eyes at the abomination he had created. But I also felt like the monster, seeing those eyes fill with hatred and wondering what I had done wrong.

I began again, trying to incorporate who I was before while vowing to be better. I would not shy away from this horror I had created, instead, striving to help it become the human I wanted to be. For my Third Version, I combined my keen observation from Version One with my indifference from Version two. But still, it was like I was missing something, as though I was full of holes. I had known emotions but they felt foreign, like something not meant for me. I felt like the monster; I wasn’t quite “human” yet, but I was so close.

In Ninth Grade I started on Version Four, I had met a girl who changed everything. Her name was Grace. We met in an early morning class where my insomnia always seemed to wear off and I constantly nearly fell asleep. Grace was always kind to me; she let me rest on her shoulder and helped me take notes. She treated me like a priority, listened to me, and was always kind. I held her hand and it felt like it had been forever since I last touched someone. I fell in love with her and realized that was what I had been missing. I had spent so much time watching the world, figuring out how things worked. Like Frankenstein in his lab, like the monster observing townspeople, I had been watching and never interacting. I recognized I was the same; we all needed love to feel human, even if none of us realized it. The fourth version of myself discovered emotion, love, and self-worth.

I had been lonely, like Frankenstein, always treating the people around me as obstacles between myself and an end goal; isolating myself. Allowing myself to love and be loved helped me understand what I was missing; it was kindness. Understanding why people felt the emotions wasn’t enough. I had to feel them myself. I am a creator, I am always striving to understand, to build, and to better myself. There is no perfect version of humanity, but I can always strive to be a kinder person. To be more human.

[dxrkblaze]

Give ME ALL FOR THAT MEME BC IM A HO N I LOVE UR WIRITNG U FUCK

this just in: ru is gay and I love her HHDGSHHDDL THAnk u sm homie I cri,,, ❤️❤️

1) of the fic you’ve written, which are you most proud of?Hmm… probably all my colors? Like, there’s a lot I’d like to go back and change, but at the end of the day it was my baby for a good two plus years and there’s a lot of personal stuff sprinkled in there. It kinda shows my emotional progression throughout high school in the story, and while that’s def not why I wrote it, it’s cool to go back and look at it sometimes to see the things I used to say/think about. Plus it’s one of the only massive projects of mine that I’ve actually completed, lol.

Also I have a lot of love for amc just bc it’s so… different, I guess? Like, I’ve never really seen something like it fleshed out into a full-length story, especially not with silver and blaze. And the fact that it rlly touched several ppl and got them rlly into it… that makes me feel kinda accomplished when I’m not being a self-deprecating prick lmao. I rlly rlly wanted it to be my first fic to get to 100 reviews for a reason!

2) favorite tense (past/present/future)Definitely past, I tried present with the unforgiven and it just made it frustrating to write, lmao.

3) favorite POV (first/second/third/etc)I prefer writing in first person, actually. I think it simplifies things for both the writer and reader, and I’ve always found a lot more freedom to be creative when I write in first person.

4) what are some themes you love writing about?Lmao well, obviously romance is priority one for me, so most of my themes stem from that. I rlly love writing about class struggle tho, whether it’s someone low who’s aiming high or a noble who isn’t satisfied with such a high class. Morality also comes up a lot in my writing, I guess; tryna figure out what the right thing to do is, tryna figure out if this character actually did the best thing, all that good stuff!

5) what inspires you to write?Definitely music… sometimes I’ll stray from it and pick up some inspo from movies/stories/etc, but 99% of the time I’ll be listening to a song and suddenly come up w a fic idea from it lmao.

6) thoughts on critiqueI encourage it!! bc I think it’s the only real way to improve. Sometimes it can make me feel bad if I’m in one of those rlly shitty self-deprecation ruts, but still I usually get over it soon even when I’m like that. I know it’s for the better, and I appreciate everyone who’s ever been kind enough, and cared enough abt my writing to give me critique!

7) create a character on the spot…. NOW!UMMMM OKIE,,, what abt a snow leopard named Kyra… she likes to sit around n read n eat noodles… her main hobby other than reading is dancing. she’s v shy but she loves her close friends n BAM I just made her gay. She’s a lesbian, harold.

8) is there a character you love writing for the most? the least? why?Most - probably silver… his personality is always one I’ve gotten a lot of joy out of writing. He’s basically a walking contradiction, lmfao. He’s also pretty easy for me to self-project onto, idk why. Least - I’m gonna say amy for this one, just because it’s been hard for me to focus on more than one aspect of her personality and flesh all of it out. Plus amy is a somewhat overused character lol, I get a lot more fun out of writing blaze/tikal/others when I need a female role, even if it’s something simple

9) a passage from a WIPOh u kno I gotta dip into royalty au for this one 👀

–

It was nearly a fortnight before any word was received from King Pyrus. It came in the form of a small parcel addressed to Blaze, which held a note inside for her. The young princess jumped at the feet of the servant who had brought it in, and once it was lowered into her hands, she hurried to her chamber. Once there, she closed the door behind her and jumped on her bed, unable to contain her excitement. With a careful claw and an eager expression, she tore the parcel’s paper away. Before looking at what it contained, she snatched the note from her father, and brought it to her face. It read:

My Little Flame,

I am sorry I could not write to you sooner. I remain busy, but I finally began exploring, and I found something I think you will simply adore. It is a traditional robe (I believe it is called a kimono) from here in the Eastern Isles. It is just as beautiful as the land, and just as special as you are to I, my dear. We must make plans to bring you here one day, it astounds me each time.

Do not fret about the ongoings in the world, how ever much you have heard. Kiniti watches over us at all times, and she will ensure peace among all kinetics. Hopefully, I will depart in the coming few days, and we will see one another soon.

With love,Father Flame

Blaze, of course, merely skimmed over the second half of the note as a formality. She laid the message aside, and her jaw dropped once she held the kimono out. It was a beautiful shade of dark purple, with an equally enchanting design. Trails of dainty cherry blossoms sat on rugged branches, which climbed up either side of the robe. The silk seemed to melt between Blaze’s fingers; it was the softest material she had ever felt. She rubbed one of the sleeves against her cheek, and purred into it. When she turned the robe over, she gasped. A large, pink bow was already tied at the back, as if it had been made just for her. She slipped the kimono over her shoulders, and although the sleeves hung low over her arms, the length was just right. Blaze tied the pieces of ribbon at her waist, just as Pyrus had taught her, and words could never express how delighted she was with the gift. She could not wait to show her father once he returned.

As Blaze was fitting her tail through the bow on her back, Baxton entered the room. Whenever Pyrus was absent, it was usually Baxton who took up the king’s general duties. He signed letters, addressed the people, attended court; it kept him quite busy. The only responsibility he didn’t inherit was any control of he army - the sole post he would be familiar with. Quite the chore it was, but Baxton was always fond of his temporary sovereign role. At least in terms of the power he held, that is. In fact, Blaze assumed that he had been yelling at some servants not too long ago, judging by his flushed face.

The elder cat scratched his head. “Princess, did the king leave a letter?”

Blaze pointed to the note on her bed. Baxton scurried to it, and frowned as he glanced over the elegant handwriting. “Is this it?” he quizzed.

The princess nodded, and held her arms out with a smile. “Look, Baxi! Look at what father sent me!”

Blaze couldn’t quite tell what Baxton’s expression conveyed, but it was something between a smile and a scowl. The note crumpled in a quick motion from Baxton’s fist, and was thrown back onto the bed cover. Blaze didn’t think much of this as Baxton hurried out, and she walked to her mirror to admire the kimono again.

–

10) what are your strengths wrt writing?Hmm… I get a lot of ppl saying that I’m pretty eloquent when it comes to phrasing/word choices? I’m constantly tinkering with how things are said, even up until like 30 seconds before I publish smth lmao. I also like to think I never just string sentences together and leave it at that when I’m narrating, I pay a lot of attention to how different sentences/phrases flow together.

11) what are your weaknesses wrt writing?My main weakness would probably be going overboard on all the little things, like how a sentence sounds or flows and stuff like that. I end up being a perfectionist with it, and sometimes when I’m crafting/changing phrases around, I end up with a sentence that kinda drags on or tries to do too much.

12) what’s your favorite place for writing resources?Tumblr’s pretty good for me, actually. I rarely ever seek out resources, but I do reblog a lot of them that come to me here and they’ve been very useful to me in the past.

13) who are your favorite writers?Ok first off binch u@aurora-boring-alis (FF: aurora-boring-alis) Then my other peeps who also make the quality goodness™™ I can’t get enough of (some fanfic accounts more active than others)@maliwarm (FF: biteworsethanbark) @lordoftheghostking28 (FF: lordoftheghostking28) @weezernaut (FF: space mercutio)@ebachan (wattpad: witto150)

[mindthewolves]

differential diagnosis of common problems in fic*

*not just fanfic, but you don’t see that much original fic from people just starting out because Gatekeepers

disclaimer – this is not a “god this is terrible writing how could you do that ever” but a “we all have blind spots and maybe would benefit from getting a beta reader” and yes, ofc that includes me too. also these are general Story Things as separate from Issues of Representation Things.

other writers, hello and feel free to chime in!

content:

characters that exist solely for another character’s development. write people as people, not objects.

relationships in which A Modicum of communication would save you 20 chapters of angst

infodumping, extensive and conspicuous exposition, the like

on the other end of the spectrum, not grounding the scene (can’t visualize what’s going on)

extreme violence without reason or as a shoddy excuse for character development, particularly as highly gendered tropes

perfection (I see this with kara a lot in supergirl fic. she’s invulnerable, with super strength, super nice, drop-dead gorgeous, and secretly a scientific whiz kid AND ALSO can paint you something to sell at Sotheby’s. this has gone too far.)

songfic with the entire song written out in the middle of the story while the plot slips through your fingers or random lyrics interspersed throughout. ditto poetry. ditto quotes by people who are supposed to lend Weight and Gravitas to the fic

medicine/science that is indistinguishable from magic. R&D takes a long time. you do not defibrillate for asystole. (hello, flash. i’m looking at you.)

the telepathic narrator: in which the POV jumps back and forth between characters (most commonly love interests) with every other sentence

see related cheat code: “character A knew that character B was feeling/thinking X, Y, and Z” just no

precocious toddlers Wise Beyond Their Years or grown-ass adults with the intellect and emotional maturity of children (again, unless done for effect)

extensive author notes that prescribe exactly what you should take away from the fic and what things were Supposed To Mean. stories do not work like that; they’re open to interpretation, AND they should stand on their own without explanation

formatting:

why is there extra white space on ao3 you guys

block text of more than ~5 lines per paragraph, i cannot read it

italics where they shouldn’t be; it’s like listening to an oddly accented musical line

weird formatting of glosses for non-English words

each character’s reaction/description should go with their dialogue

if character A is speaking:

incorrect: “What movie do you want to watch?” character B shrugged.

correct: “What movie do you want to watch?”

character B shrugged.

changing verb tense in the middle of a story

spelling and word choice:

the epithets, cease and desist. it’s distracting and it reduces your character to a single aspect (usually of their appearance) that is (usually) not relevant to the scene at all. particularly egregious: epithets based on race/ethnicity

unclear pronouns, esp with f/f or m/m ships

its =/= it’s, pls google. the first is possessive and the second is “it is”

their/they’re/there and your/you’re, remember google is your friend

lets =/= let’s and all other verbs in this pattern: the first is the verb conjugation (-s) for he/she/it in present tense. the second is “let us”

reign =/= rein. you reign over a kingdom but you “rein in” an impulse. like a horse.

taut =/= taught

weary =/= wary

bawling =/= balling

adverse =/= averse, you are “averse to” pickles but go out in “adverse” weather

it’s “another think coming” rather than “another thing”

there seems to be some confusion over the words lay and lie. you lie down on a bed, past tense lay, present participle lying, past participle lain. you lay an object down on a table, past tense laid, present participle laying. these are not the same word, despite the spelling overlap.

misspelling your character names. really?

that word does not mean what you think it means

see also: i looked this up in the dictionary no one will know it but ppl will think i am Smart

for the reader/audience side of things:

how to comment (an example, not an absolute)

thank the writer. fics are not tangible but they are still gifts

what did you like about the fic and why?

other things you’d like to see, meta about the characters, lines that stuck with you, what worked and what didn’t

if you want to offer suggestions and they are not constructive, stop right there. hard stop.

if you have constructive criticism, drop an ask and see if that’s something the writer is even interested in. you don’t walk up to someone who’s wearing a pair of gloves they just knitted and say, “that row of stitches, it’s going the wrong way.” keep in mind that ao3 or tumblr may not be the place for unsolicited critique, especially from strangers online with no established credentials. concrit is like dark magic and not to be tampered with lightly. people who actually know how to give it are probably not the people who roll up in your comments with Demands

should I even comment?

if you read The Thing, leave a comment. support your writers. it’s not just paying it back or being a good fandom citizen. language is about connection – we write to be read. the fic is the ask; the comment is the answer

fic is not a one-way street or it doesn’t have to be

& I promise that even a well thought-out comment will take a fraction of the time it took to write the actual fic

also if you are a reader who wants to write, or a reader who wants to read better, commenting (i.e. thinking about what makes fic work and putting that into words) will help up your game too

for betas and critique partners:

the diplomatic critiquer

more references

read fic that you admire, take it apart, see how it works

be clear about what the writer is looking for w a beta read AND what the beta reader is willing or able to do. for me this comes in three tiers: 

1. content editing, story problems, representation problems

2. sentence and paragraph-level problems: internal echoes, issues w writing voice, things that don’t make sense, etc. 

3. copyediting: spelling and grammar only

motion to add an opt-in “yes, looking for concrit” box on ao3

sites for critting original fic: critique circle, critters

[zagenta]

I don't mean to be annoying, but what's wrong with liking Hamilton? you don't have to answer btw I understand if you don't want to I just want to know why

It’s… complicated… I don’t even know if I should be the one to explain it. Keep in mind that at any explanation I personally give on the situation is essentially going to be far too forgiving and apologist bc I rly like the musical. Just.. Yeah anyone reading this just keep in mind that I’m inevitably going to fall in favor w the show despite its flaws bc I suck

Anyways for anyone that doesn’t just take the show as a popular thing at face value & therefore popular = good, It’s somewhat controversial bc ppl laud it as this super diverse show full of Pee Oh Cees & but there’s also been some fair critique of the show’s possibly anti-black elements b/c it treats white racist slaveowners as cool hip guys you’d wanna spit bars with.

To be fair, the show is critical of the characters/historical figures but I can understand this criticism bc it only seems to be critical up to a point? Like. Sure Hamilton is a dick for cheating on his wife and TJ is called out for being a demon but it still glosses over some of the more unpleasant & ngl sometimes downright despicable elements of the characters/historical figures, PARTICULARLY the ones we’re supposed to root for such as Hamilton, Eliza, Mulligan, Laurens, Washington, etc.

And perhaps more worryingly although Lin claims the intent is to “put PoC back into American history” (im paraphrasing), the show erases instances we actually do appear in history, such as Mulligan’s slave Cato. Or making a kind of tacky jab at Jefferson abt Sally Hemings—which to be fair that entire song is supposed to have this dissonance between the cheery tune and how messed up TJ actually was, but it’s still… weird.

Tbh I think this was inevitably going to happen bc musicals abt revolution are rly popular but always end up being reproductions of the status quo bc the majority of ppl who support & can afford to see shows on Broadway are rich & white, they don’t want anything too challenging to their worldview.

Also Lin’s not black, he’s Puerto Rican so he has a somewhat tenuous claim to the history he’s trying to reclaim in the first place, other minorities are definitely affected by America’s racism & history but this specific part of history addresses white owners of black slaves.

And he’s using rap a historically & largely black genre to tell the story, too. I mean, there’s overlap between the experiences of the Latinx/Chicanx community and the black community, but they’re not the same. & it doesn’t really have to do with “ownership” of a genre either, but the reception to Hamilton is super off-putting bc a Latinx guy is getting all this praise from rich white ppl while they don’t give a crap abt the rest of the genre. They don’t even get all the homages in Lin’s music. (If you need proof, literally any post by a basic white person talking abt how the rap they like is abt cabinet battles unlike that “other rap” about bitches and money).

(Sidenote: I know a lot of ppl have developed negative feelings towards the musical & while that’s fair I literally give 0 fucks abt white ppl’s opinions on the show. It’s important to listen to criticism from black people definitely but they fail to treat it like the complex phenomenon it is. Too often they have annoying self-righteous superiority complexes bc they think they’re better than the nasty Pee Oh Cees who just don’t get it man.)

Tbh I’m personally unsurprised that the first real hip hop musical to be a big hit is about the whitest thing ever (remember, musicals have to hit that perfect balance of revolutionary and complacent).

Also there’s the problem with fandom too… Like… People have rightly gone “what the everloving fuck” at the realization that there’s a Hamilton fandom at all & I mean that’s completely fair. I personally don’t see a problem with like… Drawing a pretty fanart of scene you like or of Daveed in his Rad Velvet Maroon Suit, but ham fandom is just descending into this huge pile of wtf bc people ship and fangirl and look up weird minutiae abt American history to justify their headcanons and it’s just bizzaro. Also thank god it’s relatively died down bc early on it was just the biggest cesspool of disgusting racism and fetishization & apologism in the world.

“Why do you still like it, Janelle?” Because I love suffering

Now some people just like the musical for its catchiness and artistry and are rightly weirded out by the hardcore fan community, and honestly I’d recommend that approach bc ngl I’m never ever going to forgive myself for being convinced that TJ & JMads were totally a Thing™

But I like both. Honestly I like them for almost entirely different reasons. Honestly at this point if I didn’t think Hamilton was literally a Masterpiece™ I would probably end up hating it just bc there was so much discourse surrounding its hype, but I think it’s just a tribute to how catchy the songs are and how talented the cast is and just the combination of everything that I still love the show despite its problems. I know it’s not great of me but I know pretty much everyone is an apologist of something they like despite its Problems.

& the fandom in my experience is a fascinating phenomenon to me personally bc in my headspace it’s practically this entirely different entity to the musical itself? Like a lot of people think it’s cringey & it definitely is but the entire reason I still am engaged is bc I found my niche of practically a handful of close knit mutuals and Only care about Their Content, except for like… The occasional drawing. Bc our personal niche is so detached from the reality of the show or the history that it’s practically original content & has lead to some rly creative works that are much less Problematic Musical abt Demon Men but with Catchy Songs and much more along the lines of Intriguing Character Studies on the Themes of Parenting, LGBT+ Experiences & Relationships, PoC’s experiences,( and also lots and lots of self-destructive behavior)

I think Hamilton is a very interesting phenomenon. In my personal opinion even in this somewhat glorification, I’m glad Hamilton is getting people interested in history, even if people are way too excited abt it and tread the demon father’s like they were Fun Quirky Guys. I understand the horrifying response to everyones giddiness, but I don’t think it’s wrong to be excited abt history/interested in history even if it verges into dark territory, heck, learning abt history in its entirety important so we don’t glamorize the terribleness that is the past. That’s why posts abt Hamilton’s bisexuality doesn’t matter bc he was a slave owner rub me the wrong way—I mean he definitely isn’t someone we should treat as the pinnacle of ideal representation, but we should also acknowledge the totality of him as a person.

Also the show a good stepping stone that will hopefully lead to more hip hop musicals in the future. I know it being a “baby step” is a rly lame-ass excuse for why the show is good but it’s making me hopeful for the future.

Sorry abt how long this was.

[aroberuka]

Evens for writers ask meme?

2. Where is yourfavourite place to write?

Either the kitchen table, which is the perfect height for my laptop & the only place in the house that gets sunlight in the morning, or my bed tbh.

4. Do you have anywriting habits/rituals?

Not writing habits so to speak but I do have a getting ready to write ritual that mostly consists of dragging myself out of bed and going for a walk.

6. Favourite characteryou’ve written?

Mouse!Surana, hands down. I kinda just made her on the spot for that one oneshot and as a result she ended up radically different from my usual OCs (they’re not usually this… driven xD), which made her such a blast to write.

8. Do you have anywriting buddies or critique partners?

@coppercaravan​ has been both for a little bit over a year and they’re such a pleasure to work with tbh.

10. Pick an author (orwriting friend) to co-write a book with

1) @coppercaravan we should stick our OCs together and see what happens, y/y?

2) That being said it’s super easy to get me to write with you literally all you have to do is drop into my inbox like “hey we should write a thing” and be very patient with my spoonie ass.

12. Which story ofyours do you like best? why?

Honestly it’s the quasiplatonic solavellan fic. I love Tathas, I put a lot of work and also a lot of me into it, I have a lot of thoughts about what’s coming next and I really wish I could finish it already esp since it wouldn’t be that long (like. 8-10 chapters tops, not counting a potential Trespasser sequel) but I haven’t been able to get in a DAI mood for forever x_x

14. What does it takefor you to be ready to write a book? (i.e. do you research? outline? make a playlist or pinterest board? wing it?)

Ideally I’d need the stars to align perfectly on a week with two Mondays, but more realistically what I need is:

-a playlist, or at least a couple artists that’ll put me in the right mood

-character sheets with some basic info + relationship charts + their stake in the plot

-a rough chapter by chapter plan that will inevitably fly out the window by the time I finish chapter 1.

16. Cover love/dreamcovers?

Not really, no.

18. Tell us about thatone book you’ll never let anyone read

So back in January there was that self-insert month thing, and I figured why the hell not, but b/c I’m apparently unable to write self-indulgent fluff and also I was in a Mood it turned into a writing as therapy thing and now I don’t know what to do with it b/c on the one hand I do want to write it & I think it would help me deal with some stuff but on the other idk that I would ever be able to let anyone read it, let alone post it online.

20. Any advice foryoung writers/advice you wish someone would have given you early on?

Length is overrated, short chapters are fine and the only good piece of writing advice is that there is no such thing as universal writing advice.

22. Tell us about thebooks on your “to write” list

… I’m not gonna give you a full list b/c it would be ridiculous but the ones that are on my brain atm are:

-- Présages aka The Novel aka that one story about ghosts that turned into a story about the importance of healthy communication & a good support system.

-- A novella about an aromantic protag that was supposed to be a subplot of the previous but is now its own thing so I can give it the attention it deserves.

-- A fantasy novel that started with me listening to too much critical role and is basically a thinly disguised metaphor for fighting against depression.

(All of them are depression books tbh and I’m not even a little bit sorry.)

And then there’s the fics:

-- A post Akuze longshot feat. Leo, grief and politics.

-- A Leverage/HP crossover feat. pre-canon Eliot, wizards and poor attempts at dragon smuggling.

-- A CCS/Naruto crossover that I’ll probably never write tbh b/c the sheer size of it is terrifying to me, but I like to dust it off every other month anyway b/c I put a lot of thought into it.

24. Do you remember themoment you decided to become a writer/author?

I don’t remember the moment I started to write – that was a long long time ago – but the moment I decided to become a writer I’m pretty sure was when I read The Princess Bride, b/c I very distinctly remember closing the book and going “I wish I’d written that”.

26. What’s the mostresearch you’ve ever put into a book?

It’s kinda hard to tell tbh b/c my research, like everything else, tends to be scattered in short bursts over months/years, but my most recent research-heavy project has been the Leverage/HP crossover, which has led me to a lot of reading on poaching/smuggling as I tried to figure out how one would go about smuggling a dragon.

Turns out there’s no actual book on dragon smuggling but I ended up learning a lot about butterfly smuggling, which as it turns out is

1)a thing

2)very serious business.

28. How do you stayfocused on your own work and how do you deal with comparison?

I don’t. I don’t stay focused on anything, ever. I also deal very poorly with comparison even tho the only one doing the comparing is my own self.

30. Do you like to readbooks similar to your project while you’re drafting or do you stick to non-fiction/un-similar works?

I do! I find it very helpful esp. when I’m writing in a genre/style I’m not used to. I try to avoid it with fanfiction tho so as to avoid accidentally absorbing other people’s headcanons into my own work.

32. On average how muchdo you write in a day? do you have trouble staying focused/gettingthe word count in?

Tbh I usually count in ‘pages’ (quote/unquote b/c I’m using my own format which is considerably shorter than what you probably think of when you hear ‘page’), and I’m trying to get myself to two pages a day for The Novel but I’m considerably slower when I’m not writing in French b/c language is hard.

34. Unpopular writingthoughts/opinions?

-- Character death is overrated.

-- The idea that conflict is necessary to tell a good story is highly subjective and even if it wasn’t a good conflict shouldn’t just boil down to ‘characters being horrible (or downright abusive) to each other’/‘characters being forced to commit or witness atrocities’ over and over again.

-- Romance is boring and so is smut.

-- Young/aspiring writers need positive feedback way, way more than criticism, constructive or not; constructive criticism overall is overrated (which isn’t to say that it’s never useful but like it’s not The One True Way For A Writer To Improve that a lot of ppl try to sell it as).

36. Post a snippet

She’s always been lucky is the thing.

Lucky to find the Reds when she needed them, lucky to lose them when she no longer did, lucky to get caught by the right people at the right time, lucky to be offered military service instead of prison, lucky that Anderson had seen something in her no-one else ever had.

Lucky to survive doesn’t feel so special.

38. How do you nailvoice in your books?

Honestly that is one thing that comes p much naturally to me? Like whenever I write in a character’s voice I can usually ‘hear’ what I’m writing so to speak, which makes things considerably easier tbh.

40. Do you look up toany of your writer buddies?

What kind of question is that I look up to all of y'all??? I’m not even kidding here y’all are amazing and talented and I’m so thrilled I got to meet all of you?

42. How many drafts doyou usually write before you feel satisfied?

I’d say 2-3 though it’s kinda hard to tell b/c I don’t strictly speaking work in full drafts, I tend to go back and forth between paragraphs instead.

44. Why (and when) didyou decide to become a writer?

I must have been like 16 or something. Hell if I remember why except I love stories and it seemed like a good idea at the time?

46. Past or presenttense?

I actually prefer past tense despite my current inability to write it (idk why all my fic end up being present tense but I suspect English).

48. Do you prefer towrite skimpy drafts and flesh them out later, or write too much and cut it back?

I mean most of my fics are already under 500 words long can you imagine if I actually cut stuff from them? :p

50. Do you share yourrough drafts or do you wait until everything is all polished?

I tend to wait until everything is polished but also, again, it’s super easy to get me to share rough drafts or even outlines with you b/c I am weak and crave validation.

52. Who do you writefor?

Me. Always.

Like listen the fact is actually talking openly & honestly about personal stuff even to people who have been there for me in the past is literally the hardest thing for me to do and I got so damn good at avoiding it I don’t even have to think before I do it anymore, and sometimes it feels like writing is the only way I can actually properly communicate anymore. So yeah I’d be lying if I said I didn’t care about ppl loving what I write but it will always be first and foremost something I do for myself.

54. Favourite firstline/opening you’ve written?

already answered here

[misterbitches]

Im not intelligent at all. In the conventional sense. The ramblings of a girl who just has sooo much going in in her head it's constant. But im not a genius. Or that confusing.

It just sounds like I am bc fandoms have this issue where they can JUSTSO point out the issues in soletiing. They can pick and prod and go oh problematic! But then you go to name the problems and the difficulties within society like for ex: the idea of representation in general. Salivating over it. How fucking sad that is. How we are trained to accept it. So in a BL and also RACE in the bl genre they exploit viewers naivete both domestically and internationally. Ive seen tons of people liken being asian to being a person of color. However, in their predominantly homogenous society (or intentionally publically homogenous society), they are not "poc" (also name the of color; i dont use bipoc idc if u do but it's called being asian guys cos yall aint talkin about black ppl lmao)

They as humans seeing other humans who look like them everywhere, engage with the world differently than an american in asia or asians living outside of their home country (like bae doo nanwhen she worksnin the US is not the same as the bae doo nanworking on a korean program) I dont complain about it in everything i see bc ppl say it ALL THE TIME. but it is NOT the same. Being a person of color is very distinctly an american concept. This is all stuff people will get to know on their own if they choose to dig more.

I do my best to underline what my ugly little eyes process. How i figure things out as a black female american artist too! Im hard on shit cos i should be. I take it seriously. And even if i dont take it seriously bc THEY dont then thats their problem.

I know this is a complaint that I am not alone in. I know it's the internet. I just don't get how people can write really heavy analysis but they refuse to actually probe the underlying issues. Not everyone is me, or like my friends, but if there's way fewer people talking about this stuff it seems absolutely glaring when theres few people engaging in the way i do. It seems like im the glitch but I am thinking just as much just differently.

I really loved where your eyes linger but there was little deep class analysis. I remember few convos a bout it. I know a lot about korea (sigh being a black ex kpop fan lol mess) and i love the history but all ofnit matters! Korea's relation to labor!

People bringing up thai actors snd actresses leaving the industry and doing acting as something quick. As an artist~ who went to film school with insanely wealthy ppl and isnin tons of debt you have to understand how shitty that is. People have monetary access and they just fucking do whatever just because they want to. Meanwhile you have young people being coerced into this bullshit mainstream life to LITERALY just make money bc they dont come from a rich background. The wealth gap in thailand is BAD, theres a dictatorship, they had a fucking coup. The governments like here do not respect their people. Their marginalized groups. Trans thai women, black thai ppl, poor thai ppl. And it LITERALLY CANNOT DO ANYTHING EFFECTIVELY IN CAPITALISM. No nothing can be perfect but if it's going into our eyeballs and we can view the worlld critically then why the fuck not!???

I dont say the things i see are wrong always. I reply when i think i need to. I try and engage with others but not to kuch avail. I just want to rb stuff and tdhink lajfhhdjwhjej.

But like yea theres a lot of just wrong or misguided stuff. A lot of the times it is just historical inaccuracy in framing or idk. A refusal to think outside the box. I dont care. Theres more to life than just sort of looking and not thinking especially for othrr artists.

Idk im sorry. I dont see how i can change how i view things. I really wish people would expand their palettes too and go deeper into other means of art from places! Things not in the mainstream! Theres a lot of good thai artists and a lot of them critical as fuck about their country as they should be. Authority, austerity, patriarchy, capital, racism etc like that is central to a power thats interested in growing gains and fiscal and social power. Theres rly radical or left leaning etc ppl out there in the world and these countries in these communities. So they exist. No people in these countries dont have NO clue whats going on. Cultural relativism is alsos something people should understand. I had a good talk with ppl on here a while ago about that. Talking about shit, critiquing, but being respectful to a group. Part of thay is realizing these groups CLEARLY know their own issues and all our cultures share the same goal. Guess what it is. It rhymes with acquiring wealth. Money means you hurt people. In the post, we talked about use of "wife" and "husband" which is a stupid joke that has been "explained" a billion times and yet the explanations still dont seem to answer or justify a minor problem (it's very funny to me that a language that doesnt have gendered pronouns is now very specific about two men. Hmmm wonder why. It is annoying.)

So im not the only person on the planet doing this. Or the few ppl ive seen that do. Im not new my thoughts arent new. Ive gotten to see another side to a culture i knew not much about and that means i can put the context of my beliefs and life and try and understand thheirs. For ex i learned from ITSAY because of a sign that said 'french food' that they were the only country to not be colonized back then. Do you know how integral that history is to their region? That was an interesting detail (i didnt finish itsay bc ihad a lot going on and i was rly upset that i would see hownrich they are and i hate that.)

Anyways thats my complaint. It used to feel like a sting of rejection. I left online for months in 2019, i started organizing more, joined a union, trying to do some panther work shit like that. I learned a lot in those months and it changed my life! But when I came back, I felt so isolated. It wasnt my true friends tho sometimes theyre ANNOYINGGGGG (love u) but it was me being like "if we are going to complain guys then lets put our money where our mouth is" lets be fucking serious about it then. No say it with your chest dude. It isnt difficult. Go with the fucking flow, talk about it, critique it, think. You can still fucking like itnor love it.

I am BLACK ok and i love rap. I am a black woman. I will continue to clown black men that cant seem to not clown themselves and listen. No i wont support monetarily: drake is a creep and i hate him but i bump that niggas song. Thats fucking LIFE. I got so sick of hiding myself and it became clear that it wasnt that i wasntthinking well or hard enough. They just didnt like that i said we need to commit class suicide and inspect out middle class sensibilities and middle class wealth hoarding (google it) if thats what we engaged with. Every part of you, antagonize it. I still have my privileges; class, skin color, even my father being a nigerian immigrant, me being cis, im not str8 but not a lesbian and those are differences.

Insecurities in general but some shallow thoughts (?) on discussion in "fandom" space. FYI, this will most likely stay the same. I tend to stay in my own bubble socially IE me and my friends are similar in our views. During this awful year while running my union's account, im surrounded by like minds. Me and my friends? We changed together. We grew up and saw what we didnt like and what we want. We do our best.And i CHOOSE my life to be that way bc it should be. There is no solution. I dont believe in solutions because the solution is to abolish capital or just divest. Abolishing capital and labor are a huge one and i will die before that happens (but so help me as long as im alive? Black women to FREEDOMMMM is my motto!) so making your own path in life is the best thing an artist can do IN MY OPINION.

However with technology and stuff this puts another layer onto things. Tech, social media, this shit....it THRIIIIIIIVESSSSSSS off of conflict and shallow readings of the world. We are literally primed for it. Engagement in bites. Impossible for me with my brain; i got used to it and i paid for it by limiting my scope. Not being encouraged to THINK AND READ before just speaking

(For ex i am in iww, i helped form a branch here. It is a radical union. Unionism is imprative to me-if ur interested u should read up on some. Look up peter cole! Google inthesetimes Ilwu. Gives you some understanding. Ive always been progressive and now i am....very left idk ic ant label myself. But even in my progrssiveness i had the gall to tell my white friend, whoa has her privileges but i had mine with our class disparity, that we dont need unions, i have WORKED retail. Ive done barista work for sonoing and i do gig work. So i wasnt out of touch. I had been stiffed even with a shoot i was working on by rich kids. So i had a frame of reference . But i didnt know what the FUCKa union was and why it is imperative. Then learning about anarcho syndicalism and all these other things. It changed my fucking life but two years earlier i was this idiot spouting shit like that making one of my best friends fucking upset. We DO AND CAN CHANGE. Think!!!!)

So were i a creator for tv id just constantly try and push the buttons if i need big money. Make them sell into me (thank you sonic youth!) theres Endless possibilities guys which means theres SO MUCH TK EXPLORE!!!! When i wanna have fun with it i just have fun. When i want to think i do. I dont understand why we are so dedicated to upholding things and doing mental gymnastics to end up in a space you dont need mental gymnastics for. What about these critiques makes you uncomfortable? Saying we're all part of the problem as spectators? Im sorry but we will always be. Thats LIFE. God fuck. Fuck me. I feel so fucking worthless and stupid sometimes. I know I am not. I know i am talented and intelligent. I know my friends and family. I know how to approach ppl. I know how to tell people if they are rich but want to be progressive whatsup. I choose how i live part of that is being ok to say what i want.

Ironically consrrvatives say this shit alot. But they arent ever alone bc their ideology is default. But yea it does feel shitty. It even feels shitty when ur in left circles but people STILL dont even wanna do that. These perspectives really arent ss many as they should be. I dont want to feel so alone with it. I know there are more. I just love art and the world so fucking much, endless possibility. Endless pain but endless good.