#i tried basing the sort of panic attack on ones i've had

[dixons-sunshine]

Breathe With Me | Young!Daryl Dixon x Young!Fem!Reader

Summary: With you and Daryl being in a good place, kissing coming naturally to you both and cuddling no longer awkward, it was inevitable that your make out sessions would start to heat up into something else. However, in the heat of what should've been a hot moment, Daryl's mind started to wander to it's usual self deprecating depths. Luckily, you were there to help him through it.

Genre: Kinda angsty but mainly fluff

Era: Pre outbreak.

Part of the Shopping Spree, Hangout Dreams universe.

Warnings: Swearing, suggestive themes, self deprecating thoughts, hyperventilation/panic attack.

Word count: 1.2k

A/n: Another young!Daryl fic in a span of not even two days? Who would've thought it was possible? It's mainly because I've been enjoying writing for young!Daryl recently, and I'd be happy to get any requests for this au. Also, I've never personally experienced a panic attack myself and this is all based off of what Google told me, so if any of it is inaccurate, please let me know so I can fix it. Other than that, I hope you enjoy!

As always, my requests are open for any TWD requests, as well as Scud Frohmeyer requests.

—

“Oh, fuck.”

“Shit, girl. Yer gon' be the death of me.”

You giggled against his lips, allowing him to push you down onto the bed. He followed soon after, moving to hover over you before reattaching his lips to yours hungrily. He used one of his hands to hold his weight up, the other one wandering over your exposed stomach. Your shirt was already disposed of and long forgotten, leaving you clad in only your shorts and bra.

To your surprise, when your hands wandered under Daryl's shirt, he only hesitated for a quick moment before withdrawing from the kiss and tugging his shirt over his head. Old and new scars were on display for you, leaving Daryl completely vulnerable under your gaze.

You smiled at him and pulled him down for another kiss, a silent way of thanking him for trusting you. It wasn't the first time that you had seen his scars—you had helped him with his wounds too many times too count, leaving you familiar with all of his scars—but you always tried to make sure that he knew you didn't judge him. You loved every part of him, scars and all.

You gasped against his lips when he let his hand trail down, his fingers lightly tracing over your clothed cunt. His tongue entered your mouth and he groaned at the taste. He pulled back momentarily to look at you, his pupils blown with lust.

“Fuck, yer so perfect,” he whispered, leaning down to leave a trail of kisses from your jaw to your neck.

You moaned when he kissed a particularly sensitive spot, leaning your head back to grant him better access. Your mind was starting to get cloudy, the only thought on your mind being how good Daryl was making you feel. Admittedly, you were also nervous, since this would be your first time doing something like this, but you trusted Daryl. He wouldn't ever hurt you.

In an unexpected move, you managed to roll you both over. Daryl's eyes slightly widened in wonder, before smiling and leaning up for another kiss. His hands settled on your waist, allowing you to take the reigns for the moment.

Daryl was thoroughly enjoying himself. However, when he felt you subconsciously grind your hips against his, his mind zoomed in and focused on one thing—you would regret this. You would regret giving your first time to someone like him. He would be terrible at this and you'd finally kick him to the curb after figuring it out. He didn't deserve to have you in this way, in your most vulnerable state.

You would regret him.

Daryl's breathing started becoming erratic. Although you could've easily misinterpreted it as him simply getting more turned on, something told you it wasn't that. You pulled back from the kiss and looked at him, noticing the slightly pained expression on his face. His breathing was quick and choked off, and he seemed to be in some sort of daze. You instantly knew something was wrong.

“Daryl, hey, look at me,” you whispered, cupping his cheek and gently urging him to look at you. When his blue eyes met yours, you could very clearly see the panic in them.

Instantly, all previous lustful thoughts left your mind, concern for your boyfriend taking root in their place. You knew exactly what was happening; Daryl was busy having a panic attack. You helped him into a sitting position, still straddling his lap. You grabbed his hand and placed it on your chest right above your heart, hoping to divert his attention away from whatever negative thoughts were plaguing his mind.

Still looking deeply into his eyes, you gently caressed his cheek with the hand that wasn't holding his over your heart. “Try to breathe with me, okay?” you whispered, starting to breathe in a controlled rhythm.

Daryl nodded and began to copy your breathing, his sounding more choked up than yours. He tightened his grip on your waist with his hand that was still resting there, desperately trying to ground himself back to reality. It took a while, with you soothingly rubbing your thumb over his cheekbone and breathing with him in a controlled rhythm, but soon he was calming down.

Daryl felt ashamed of himself. There the two of you were, half naked and sharing what should've been a blissful, enjoyable experience, and he let himself get into his own head. He let his own insecurities get in the way. He should've just sucked it up, but instead he just had to ruin the moment.

“M'sorry,” he muttered, looking down to avoid what he thought would've been a disappointed stare.

You frowned slightly and gently grabbed his face with both hands, urging him to look at you. “Hey, it's okay,” you assured him. When he shook his head in denial, your grip became more firm. “It is okay. Don't blame yourself for something that was out of your control, alright? Do you wanna talk about it?”

Daryl hesitated for a moment, but nodded slowly. “I jus' got into my own head. I was nervous and convinced myself ya would regret givin' yer virginity to me. Started feelin' overwhelmed. M'sorry.”

You pressed a kiss against his forehead, giving him a reassuring smile. “Don't be sorry. I get it. I was nervous too, you know? But I wouldn't have regretted anything. I trust you. There's no one I'd rather do this with. But it's okay if that doesn't happen right now. I'm ready whenever you are.”

Daryl gave you a small smile before leaning forward to rest his forehead against your shoulder. “M'still sorry. I was lookin' forward to this.”

“Me too, but it can wait. Let's get you taken care of, okay? And I don't wanna hear any buts, mister.”

Daryl nodded. “Alrigh',” he agreed, but made no effort to lift you off his lap. Instead, he pulled you closer to him, hugging you tightly. “Thank you fer understandin'.”

“Of course.”

There was a lot of things going through Daryl's mind at that moment. Despite your reassuring words, he still felt awful for what happened, his mind continuing to shame him. However, with your hands now gently threading through his hair to bring him some comfort, not giving a damn that you were still half naked and straddling him, he forced his mind to shut up.

And in that moment, it was confirmed in his mind—Daryl Dixon knew that he was never letting you go.

©dixons-sunshine 2024. I do not give permission for my works to be copied, modified, adapted or translated to any other site or platform without evidence of my given consent.

[wandafiction]

Trust Is Not Like Candy - Just Us Chapter 14

Warnings 18+: Teasing, Smut, Praise kink, Fingering (Reader Receiving).

Word Count: 2485

Series List | Chapter 13 | Chapter 15

================================

"Yeah, I, uhm. I'm okay. I just had a moment yesterday and ended up tripping backwards against my kitchen counter." A bow my head, my socks becoming very interesting at this point.

"A moment? This also happened after you dropped me off?" She doesn't force me to look up at her, she simply grabs my hands that have picking at each of my fingernails and leads me over to the couch. "What sort of moment." 

I shrug my shoulders, my eyes darting from left to right. Dammit I have odd socks on. Red, blue, red, blue. Left, right, left, right. I see her bend down in front of me, one hand resting on my left knee that started bouncing by itself. Stupid left leg. The other comes to rest under my chin, lifting my head ever so slightly so my eyes can meet hers. She frowns a me slightly.

"Was it because of what happened between us?" Her voice cracking slightly with the idea of possibly causing me hurt.

"God no Wanda, nothing at all to do with what you and I did." My body slumps as I officially decide to tell the truth. "I got some news from a friend yesterday and got a little overwhelmed with like 1000 different emotions at once. I ended up having a panic attack. When he went to help me he touched me and I recoiled, it's a reaction I have...not sure why. But I pushed him off me while moving backwards, which is quite difficult during a panic attack I must say. And I have the black eye to prove it, because I tripped, fell, bang. Didn't black out though." 

Silence engulfed the room, I swallowed harshly not liking that she is not saying anything. Maybe I've said too much. I know some people have their own struggles or don't want to have to deal with someone who has panic attacks. I get it, they can be scary if you don't know what to do. I use to get them all the time with steph and she tried her best but it was difficult on her, I believe its what truly broke us. I look back down at my lap, the small coffee stain on the sweatpants now more interesting then the red-head in front of me.

"Thank you for telling me." My head shot up at her words.

"You asked what happened, and I'm not not going to tell you. It's embarrassing but I guess it happens, not recently though. Well until yesterday." Her thumbs started stroking my cheek while the other continued to hold my knee.

"No, I asked if it was caused by what we did. Not what actually caused it, but you told me anyway. So thank you." Her soft green eyes watch my face as a look of understanding fills it. She's right she didn't ask, so why did I tell her?

"But you would have asked anyway." She shrugs lightly.

"Maybe, but you could have still said no." 

"But I mean surely it's like a respect thing, no? I mean you tell me something then I'm obligated to tell you something when you ask." 

"Not unless your comfortable, which is what you tell me right?."

"Yeah, I guess."

"There is no guessing about it. You do. This whole weekend has been amazing because you have made sure I am comfortable with anything and everything we have done so far. So why can't you do that for yourself." I shrug, not really knowing how to answer.

"I don't know. I mean it's like if you open up to me about some of your past or something that's bothering you. Surely I have to do the same, isn't that what relationships are based on? That blind trust for one another?" 

"Oh dorogoy. Who told you that?" I perk up at the Russian nickname for sweetheart. "This isn't going to be how this one works. You can't just give someone all your trust straight away because it can cause so much hurt if they don't return it or when something at the beginning goes wrong. You can't spill all your demons at once." 

"I guess. You sound like your talking from experience, princess." She hums and nods her head.

"This may sound rude, but it isn't intended to be I just need you to know where I stand." I sit up straight giving her my full attention as she takes a seat on the coffee table in front of me. "I trusted Vision with my life and he knows nearly all my deep dark secrets and demons, but he broke that trust by cheating on me."

What a fucking prick. 

"Not just once. It had been going on for months. So he broke that trust. He broke all of my trust. So even though I told you about my brother it doesn't mean I trust you completely. You have to show me I can trust you, earn my respect. I can't give out my trust if all I get in return is hurt." She takes both my hands in hers. "So even though there has to be a small amount of trust to get this thing going and start to open up and getting to know one another. We don't have to hand it out like it's candy."

"Don't hand it out like candy. I like that." A smile at her as she giggles. "And thank you, for trusting me enough to tell me about your brother." I move to lay down on the sofa, a small cushion below my head so it's raised slightly so I can watch the TV. "Now come give me cuddles." 

I make grabby hands towards Wanda, causing her to roll her eyes and giggle again. Even her giggle is cute! I'm going to die a happy gay if she keeps laughing. Wanda gives into my childish behaviour, climbing up so her body his between my legs. Her legs intertwining with mine, her head gently resting on my abdomen as her arms wrap themselves around my waist. She lets out a deep breath, her body sinking into mine more as she relaxes. I lean over slightly to grab the TV remote pressing play on the sitcom Wanda had selected. The Dick Van Dyke Show, can't say I've watched it before.

We watched a couple of episodes, both of us giggling at the TV every now and again. I subconsciously was brushing my hand through Wanda's wavy red locks, I think I like it best when it's all curly and frizzy like this. I allow my nails to scratch at her scalp as we continue watching, I hear a small hum of pleasure from deep in Wanda's throat as I scratch my nails up and down her head. She seems to like the contact as she buries herself deeper into my grasp, if that's even possible, moving her head ever so slightly so she can look up at me through her eyelashes and a small smile adorned on her face.

I stop my movements, I swear I hear a small whine leave her lips, as my eyes drink her all in. She nuzzles her head against my abdomen trying to get my hand to move once again, but I decide to move it further down to the top of her back. I slide my hand under her shirt, the skin on skin contact causing goosebumps to rise on her skin a small shiver moves down her spine. I start off by gently rubbing my hand up and down slightly before starting to scratch my nails up and down the top of her spine. So gentle it wouldn't leave ar mark, but enough so she could feel the sensation.

Her body vibrates at the contact and I can feel her try and push her legs together slightly, but they are trapped between mine. I smirk down at her, seeing a small blush grow on her cheeks and ears the heat seeping through my top onto my abdomen. She shuffles slightly lifting her head off my abdomen, her hands moving from around my waist to lift the bottom of my shirt. Wanda then moves her head to under my shirt, starting to leave small wet kisses all over my abdomen. She gets to my right hipbone and nips at it with her teeth, causing a gasp to leave my lips and I can feel her smirk. She soothes the area with her tongue before she slides her hands up and under my shirt up to my chest. She takes a breast in each hand and starts to massage them, giving both of them equal attention while her mouth moves across from one hip to the other nipping every now again, sure to leave a trail of hickeys.

I let at a small sigh when she nips at my left hip before moving her head up to join her hands, taking my left nipple into her mouth as she massaged the other one. Her tongue flicked the now hardened bud scraping her teeth along it slightly earning a moan from me. She seems satisfied with that reaction because she moves to my other nipple taking that into her mouth while bringing her other hand up to massage the now neglected one. Once she has given them both of them attention from her mouth she moves her head out of my shirt continuing to kneed them with her hands. 

She moves up my body, keeping her hands where they are gently squeezing every now and again each time earning a moan or sigh from me. Wanda smashes her lips against mine, her tongue brushing against my bottom lip and I open my mouth immediately. I'm very interested to see where this will lead, and her being on top is very hot. She moves her kisses down my jaw to my neck where she nips and sucks at the sensitive skin. My hands squeeze her hips causes her to rock against my body both of us letting out breathy moans. So I squeeze them again. She gets the message and continues to rock her body against both of us moaning against one another. She moves her lips to my ear her accent thick when she speaks to me.

"I'm going to fuck you now dorogoy. Is that okay?" I moan as a shiver goes down my spine at her voice. 

"Please." I push my hip against hers causing her to moan into my ear. 

Wanda sits up on my hips, removing her hands from under my shirt grabbing the bottom of it and moving it up my chest. I lift myself up slightly so she can take it off, throwing it somewhere in the roo, she moves to take hers off in one swift movement joining mine on the floor. She presses her body against mine and I moan at all the skin on skin contact as she begins to rock her body against mine once again. Her hand move to the top of my sweatpants but instead of pulling the fabric down her hands travel under them, and over my underwear feeling the growing wet patch. She leans to whisper in my ear once again.

"So wet for me." If what she was saying doesn't do it for me, her accent definitely does. I hum in response, turning my head to look at her, our lips ghosting one another. 

"Be a good girl and make me feel good." Her face instantly flushes her low groan escaping her throat, burying her head into the crook of my neck as she starts to leave small kisses along it. 

Her fingers pushes my underwear to the side and she moves them up and down through my folds. I kiss her hard as she swallows my moans happily. She gently places her thumb on my clit, the slightest pressure as she rolls her thumb over it. I move my hands up her body, one the back of her neck and the other between her shoulder blades. I push her head down slightly. She licks a line from the top of my throat to my sternum before moving back over to my left nipple taking it into her mouth as her tongue starts to flick over it. My body jolts in pleasure as she dips her fingers into my center before removing them. She is teasing me, oh this won't do, let me try something.

"Baby girl, stop teasing otherwise no cummming for you after this." Her movements stop suddenly, I look down to see her already looking up at me, a dark blush on her cheeks, her jaw open in shock. 

I move my hand from the back of her neck to her jaw, closing her mouth for her. She blinks a few times before her hand starts to move again, this time entering one finger into me, not bringing it back out. She brings her still flushed face back up to the crook of my neck, her finger still buried deep in me. 

"You like it when I call you baby girl?" She nods into my neck as she speeds up her finger curling it every now and again earning many moans from me that vibrate against Wanda's head. 

I moan without a filter when she adds a second finger, pumping in harsher than before. Curling her fingers around my walls everytime she pulls them back, hitting the spot that makes my eyes roll to the back of my head, my back arching off the couch. Wanda moves her head to smash our lips together continuing her movements inside of me as her body moves against mine with each pump of her fingers. 

I feel my walls flutter around her fingers as she brings me ever closer to the edge, my mouth now not responding to hers as moans spill out along with her name. A few strokes later and my walls clamp around her fingers as white hot heat rushes out coating her fingers, a loud guttural moan leaving my mouth. She helps me ride the aftershocks before bringing her fingers to her mouth, cleaning them off. 

"You taste so good." She rests her now clean hand on my chest as she looks down at me.

"You did such a good job, baby girl. You made me feel amazing." 

"Really?" She beems down at me, someone has a praise kink. 

"You were such a good girl for me, why don't I reward you." Wanda takes her bottom lip between her teeth as her eyes darken a small hum escaping her throat. 

"What's my reward?" Her hand starts brushing up and down my chest.

"Get that pretty butt up here and sit on my face." Her face flushes but she complies, scrambling to bring herself above me.

Tonight is going to be a long night. 

================================

[flame-cat]

okay kim stans, now that I have your attention I'm dropping a fic idea that I'll never ever make. free to a good home. kisses kisses kisses <3

kind of smashing together a bunch of little ideas I've shown off and also kept in my brain privately for fun-having reasons. it's kind of just my dissertation on why kim is absolutely pathetic when you take down his walls. he's a tin soldier. nothing but thin walls and hollow insides. <- OUGH THATS GOOD USING THAT AT SOME POINT

so basically vague handwavey idea that I think its some time into like, the point a lot of the meta-fandom narrative has gotten to, some time down the line after a lot of the initial Mess post-martinaise smooths out into something that looks normalish, or at least isn't an immediate crisis. harry is on a sober streak, [the Hetero-Sexual Life Partners are at the very least not constantly trying to kill each other (kim has had a Talk with Jean, who is mostly just privately seething and malding now and feeling incredibly sorry for himself). ] <OR> [there was an Incident where Jean got really REALLY sorry for himself and made a whole fucking scene and basically tried to kill himself, heavily based on a fic i read (called Trigger Warning) it kinda woobifies jean a bit but other than that its soooo fucking good but tl;dr the jobwives have made up and ] kim and jean are kind of both Harry's partner in ways? jean is still a satellite officer but a lot of times he gets paired up with Harry and kim and they're kind of the nightmare blunt rotation right now.

soooo again handwaves somehow one of the old cases Kim's partner left behind that was left cold picks up a lead again out of the blue and Kim is. well. he's normally a workaholic but this is intense even for him. like Jesus. nobody at the 41st has seen him like this. he doesn't sleep for days on end. (maybe he picks up speed? from jean? he considers doing it in-game to improve his Performance so I don't think thats above him).

anyway rock meet hard place Harry finally gets the poor sod to take a god damn break and go home, he and jean can sort out his disaster area of a desk and cover for him. Kim obliges, goes home and- OH SHIT WHO IS THAT! uhhh its all very vague in my head here but tl;dr Kim gets jumped maybe? nd this was all some sort of like. Ploy? to uhh . idk I think maybe the moralintern is involved in ways. but uh eyes is alive and was an espionage and faked his death and is now like. idrk yet if He stabbed Kim or what, or why its all even. happening in the first place. and tbh its not important to me cause I'm never gonna write it, I don't plan to its just something to play with at night to fall asleep.

important bit is now Kim is Leaking Everywhere and well. doesn't exactly have time to call gotlieb. so. he stitches himself up (NOT THAT WELL) and trudges back to the precinct to report to pryce. understandably people are freaked out by the Blood and stuff. harry comes with Kim to the briefing. shit gets Revealed. Kim dissociate. harry is like uhhhh okay well his home isn't safe anymore. jean can he crash on your couch can you drive us there while I sit in the back with him. and jean is like. fuck. okay. and yeah Kim kinda comes back into it on the ride there, has a Teensy Weensy (HUGEBADMASSIVE) panic attack, eventually calms down enough to clamber out of the car and. jeans apartment is 4 floors up and there's no elevator. hell on earth. Kim refuses to be helped up but 2 floors up he trips and let's jean help him, then they get to the top and Kim is like. Jean. and jean is like what- ohgodyoureunconsciousnowokayharryopenthedoor. and uhhh the rest is pure self indulgent "the boys nurse him back to health mwah" but way messier obvs. like fully "ok I have to take out the stitches you did and restitch you, throw back this glass of whiskey and try not to vomit on me. oh well he passed out. at least he's not feeling it?" and yeah.

anyway there's a Conversation between jean and harry at one point because the through line here is that harry is trying to keep his Boys safe but he doesn't know how they can keep doing This *gestures to the cop thing* and so jean is like okay well are we gonna work the case without him orrrrr and harry is like I am NOT moving a MUSCLE until Kim is 100% okay. he stayed with me for 2 days after I got shot. and jean is like okay bye- and harry is like no listen. I don't. we are killing ourselves here. and jean is like yeah? point? and harry is like maybe we. shouldn't. and they have a whole argument about it but that wakes up Kim who eats shit trying to get up and they both like rush in to make sure he didn't fuck up the new stitches or bust his head open right, and Kim is like. okay conflict resolution time. refuses to back down until everything is explained in detail to him even if he's still loopy. anddddd tl;dr Kim agrees with harry and idk what happens next but there u go

[aetherhollowarchive]

Hi! I found out about your game today thanks to a reblog, and tried it out!

It's an interesting approach to the trope, since most "isekai" of this kind have the MC be killed and reincarnated, while in this case it's the other world's character who died insteand with the MC being transported to take their place. I don't think I've ever seen that configuration before!

Other than that, I can't really say much yet considering we're in early story.

But I'm grateful for the very simple approach to choices and stats. I'ts very intuitive and doesn't make me feel pressured to min-maxing stuff!

That aside, I have two small coding issues to report, as well as a question!

For the bugs or whatever: - I have picked the option "The idea of having a whole empire under your care was, at this moment, crippling" when the MC thinks about the whole empire thing, but the follow up page seems to tell the opposite (with MC being excited): "It would be quite entertaining to be the head of an empire. You imagine lavish parties, champagne flowing out of golden flutes, masquerades and, most importantly, court intrigue! This was all hypothetical, of course, as you still thought it was all some elaborate hoax. Or a social experiment of sorts." - Another one is after going out and meeting someone. When my MC came back to the chambers, I had this: "Yes, going out now would be quite irresponsible. You knew nothing about the customs of this weird place and wouldn’t even know if you did something wrong before they might strung you up and burn you to the steak, if that was a thing, you didn’t know." - it seems to imply he didn't go out at all?

And for the question, it's a bit more complicated... This is something that I have to ask every time I start an isekai themed story. You see, my biggest trigger in fiction as a whole is an isekai story that ends with the MC going back to their home world. This is something that literlly enduces severe panic attacks in me, so I have to be very careful with what I play or read in terms of isekai, and I need to keep myself informed of that aspect of the ending(s)... And so, are you planning on letting us decide if our MC wants to go back or to stay? Or are you planning multiple endings in that regard? I understand if you don't feel comfortable revealing that, but I wanted to assure this is not me fishing for spoilers. It may be the weirdest trigger a person can have, but somehow my brain works that way, it seems. If it wasn't this severe of a trigger I wouldn't ask. If you really can't or don't wish to answer, I will just wait until the story is done, probably, since I can't allow myself to get involved in case the MC going back at the end is unavoidable - but well, I guess it doesn't hurt to ask, right?

Thank you for taking the time to read this! Have a great day!

Glad you like the concept so far! 💕 And yeah, I wanted not to pressure people into making choices just because down the line it gives an outcome they want. Besides some flavored text, most of the important decisions will be choice based, not status based. And thanks for the bugs! I wrote 1 wrong letter and 1 wrong number in each cases :)) Should would well now, only Blythe's route in the tower seemed to be coded wrong for when MC came back to the room. As for MC going back home, it's an option, but not an obligation. MC's motivation for helping/pretending to be Sovereign can be that it helps with the goal to go home throughout the game, and one endgame option is indeed to go home (unrelated to the motivation until then)... but it is not entirely a good ending. I'm basically writing it for pure angst, no matter the romance and the path MC takes until that point😅 The way I have it planned, MC will have 3-5 ending options (with some Good/Evil variables), and one of them will be to go back, but all the rest involve staying. It's definitely not a 'it was all a dream' thing. I think that's my biggest trigger :))

[smolcinnamonchipmunk]

I dunno if my ask went though, tumblr said no links are allowed in the ask. If it didn’t just lmk plz cuz im just sobbing/j

But I’ll rewrite here so if it did you can ignore this haha.

Anyways you fave anon is back, me 🌽 anon /j. So I loved what you did with my ask before and gotta say didn’t expect art but it was also amazing I ate that up. Anygays, I was recently scrolling in your page since I haven’t been here for a lil while and my eyes caught your post with Alister(?) with Abyss with the whole theatrical bit. And that obviously had me hooked since I’m also a lil hyper fixed on hazbin myself but not fully…yet.

So I decided to come back with this one simple ask:

What kind of demon is Abyss and power or abilities do they posses? Also also what are their relations with the hazbin crew, like what are their usual interactions with one another?

Now one may say that one is simply curious….which is half true. One could say that I could be getting more info to cook up something that one might enjoy.

That’s all form me, until we meet again! /ref

Ps: love your art!! I always eat it up and it is simply divine!!! Have a lovely day and always be gay /j

- 🌽 anon

Unfortunately, your original ask never went through, but I'm very glad you doubled down on it. It's one of the reasons why I try to make posts encouraging asks sometimes, in case someone either forgot or realizes that it probably might not have gone through

Now, onto the ask. Lemme just start with: AAAAAAAAAHHHH! I fucking love Hazbin so much! I've loved it since the pilot, it's just one of those things I've silently enjoyed for years, I couldn't help but make an OC! Also, sorry for the rambling in advance, this is going to be long. Like, LONG long, so buckle up buddy bois. Also, also, very brief mentions of suicide, rapists, and murderers, but it’s a Hazbin post, sooooo

Of course, the initial was a more feline demon, as you can see, but then I was talking with an old RP buddy that suggested deer since I wasn't quite sure about their original design. Deer had been on my radar, but I tried the cat first. I love both, but the deer based one is definitely the one I prefer. I actually based the coloration and bioluminescence on this reply from @roseytoesy that I forgot to add in my original post of Abyss (Sorry Rosey!)

Abyss has two primary ‘abilities’. Abilities in quotations because one is passive: they have a venomous bite and venomous spines. They're laced with a venom so potent that they easily killed their first demon on accident when they were attacked and their assailant stabbed themself with a spine. Since joining Hell, they've also found out that their venom can be a very potent drug if processed/diluted a certain way, so their main source of income is selling their venom concentrate. Their spines, however, will lose both potency and bioluminescence within three days. They'll use these shed spines to hang stuff up in their room sometimes though

Their second ability is the only reason they weren't exterminated during the angels coming down, and it's the fact that they can shrink. It's mostly involuntary and just sort of a panic button to slip away. They've gotten better at controlling it so that they're not just shrinking everytime they get spooked, but it still happens occasionally. They’ll also use it to shrink slightly to help shrug off people touching them. I’m not sure whether or not to add more abilities, but there's the two for now

As for day to day interactions, I also have to think about how they'd be introduced and general personality

Of course, Abyss is another self-insert, so mostly what my other characters do, they do as well. They’ve got a rather dry sense of humor and sarcasm, though they’re not very good at reading other people’s sarcasm and will tend to take things at face value. They’re a pretty recent fall compared to the others, less than five years in Hell, so they’re more skittish and anxious than cold-hearted or confident in their abilities. They are, however, one to make fast friends given the opportunity and compatibility. They love games, but find Charlie's overly childish games a bit nauseating

They're very… skittish/antsy/defensive when first being introduced to new situations and hate leaving whatever small comfort zone they can make in Hell. So I more or less picture them sneaking around to scout out the place and the inhabitants before they decide whether or not they want to actually be a part of the whole operation. I think they'd last maybe two days before being outed by Alastor

I'm imagining since Alastor just doesn't show up in some episodes that it's not uncommon for him to be missing from the hotel occasionally during the day. But, when he comes downstairs the next day Charlie is like, “Now that everyone's here!” and Alastor just goes “I think you're missing someone”, just YOINKING them from nowhere and plopping them in front of everyone. He probably knew they were in the hotel the entire time but thought it’d be funny to give them a false sense of security before just procuring them from wherever they were hiding

Aside from the obvious surprise at the sudden deer demon, initial impressions would range from skepticism with maybe even the thought of them being a new attempt for the Vees to get information about the hotel. But, thanks to Charlie wanting to see the best in everyone and them barely knowing about the Vees (Only Vox because of the TVs everywhere), everyone would cool off mostly pretty quickly. And, here’s what I think everyone’s relationship would be with them in no particular order

Charlie, of course, would love that there was another demon interested in the hotel, even if she’s a bit appalled and stumped at what she’s working with when she finds out that they committed suicide and mostly didn’t do much wrong in their life (I'm going with the thing I grew up with where Catholic people would tell me that if someone committed suicide they'd instantly go to Hell). Most of their sins would occur after reaching Hell, such as drug use and killing (even if most times is in self-defense). Abyss would have an amicable relationship with Charlie, being suspicious of the good-nature at first. But, once they’re comfortable with Charlie, they have no problems just hanging out and shooting the shit with her. Even though they will find her optimism sometimes a bit overbearing, they’d try to be polite about it (in their own way)

Vaggie would be suspicious of them at first like with Sir Pentious, but would overall not really mind them. Probably wouldn’t like their attitude a bit because if she says “I’ve got my eye on you” or something, they’ll almost definitely reply back with “Well, you’ve only got the one”. I think they would eventually get along with each other. Maybe not super buddy-buddy, but friendly enough. Abyss definitely thinks Vaggie is a bit too suffocating with Charlie sometimes, but it’s between the two girls not them, so as long as Charlie doesn’t mind

Angel Dust is one where I’m not quite sure where their relationship would stand, either at first or over time. He’d probably make a raunchy joke or something to test the waters to see if he can piss them off to get a reaction. I can’t imagine him trying to make a pass at them because they sound more feminine, but if he did they’d probably be caught off guard and either reply bluntly in confusion or give a playful comeback thinking it was a bit. I can imagine them being drinking buddies with both of them at the bar. I feel like he’s the type to maybe find random ramblings amusing? Which is good if he’s drinking with them

Husk is another one I’m not entirely sure about. I feel like it’s a very hit or miss with him. Currently my buddies and I have said that he's the most like one of my friends, so I feel like Abyss and him would get along fairly well. Even if they don't particularly like each other the most, it'd probably be pretty amicable. Also, Abyss would definitely try to be nice because they're still new-ish and also can't imagine that being a bartender in Hell is better than in the human world. Fucker is used affectionately

Nifty would probably be a bit curious and vice versa, but I think both of them would mind their own business overall. I think she’d be a bit appalled by the disarray in Abyss’s room if she ever goes in because they’re a cluttered mess. Not dirty necessarily, but very unorganized and everything is everywhere. Both would definitely cause chaos while drunk

Sir Pentious is one where he definitely wouldn't trust them at first, but he's also a bit of a goofball. Aside from probably passing out if he tried to squeeze them because of their spines, Abyss likes his inability to take certain jokes (like in the Pilot when Angel calls him “daddy” and he confusedly goes “Son?”), and will help explain things when they can. I feel like he doesn't particularly like them until they show an interest in his gadgets or egg bois. Do they understand what he's talking about? Absolutely not, they just want to hold a gun

Now, for who you're probably waiting for, Alastor! He’s a bit more complicated. Not because he’s hit or miss with Abyss, I think he wouldn’t actually dislike them. Hell, he might even like them. More because he’s still a mystery in general and more… conflicting? I know that I already drew a picture of him taunting Abyss to make them shrink, but I can’t help but think of this page from the Hazbin Hotel comic that came out on the official site years ago

From what we see in the whole comic, he only threatens the butcher when the butcher reaches for his cleaver to potentially strike at Alastor. Even then, when the butcher backs down and starts preparing his meat, Alastor doesn’t go full sicko mode. He’s perfectly chipper and back to being pleasant. It’s only when the butcher just grabs the sheep demon that he goes ballistic and ‘kills’ him. I don’t know if by ‘fairer means’ he just means weaker people/demons or just feminine people/demons (He came from the 1930s, he probably goes off appearance and voice rather than asking people pronouns)

Now, I’m not sure how canon the prequel comic is in general since it’s been years since it’s illustration, but we also see similar instances in the show. Maybe not exactly coming to the aid of someone off beat, but Alastor never really starts shit. He’s just fully prepared to finish it. He didn’t come after Vox, Vox started dissing him and then he retaliated effectively. He wasn’t really bothered by Sir Pentious, even when he blew up a wall, until he either mentioned the Vees or presumably just kept pestering Alastor to fight, where he defeated him soundly. Even with Lucifer, I think the reason he was so pissy on sight is that he was blatantly ignored at first and then immediately presumed to be the bellhop before Lucifer proceeded to insult his work on the decor and bash on the hotel before singing about obviously needing the ‘Big Boss of Hell’s help

Anyways, back to interpersonal relations between Abyss and Alastor.

He’d probably do the classic “I’m sure you’ve heard of me from my radio show” thing, to which Abyss would reply “I haven’t, sorry”. since they weren’t around before he left for seven years. Now, the thing that I think would make this a favorable interaction for Abyss is that they apologized. Regardless of whether it was a quick sorry or a genuinely sheepish look since Alastor always seems to have a massive point of pride on his radio show, they still did it. Angel Dust kind of just got told who he was by Vaggie in the pilot, but Lucifer downright disrespected this man by calling him a has-been because he hasn’t heard of the Radio Demon, even though the same King of Hell doesn’t even have a television either

I feel like Abyss could remain in Alastor’s… well, probably not favor, but good graces is the best phrase I can think of, as long as they are generally chill and polite enough. He’s surrounded by delinquents, murderers, rapists, and so on. I think a coping semi-depressed deer who curses like a sailor but generally doesn’t cause trouble is alright in his book. I think though that, like Lilia from Twisted Wonderland, he does like taunting and spooking them to get amusing reactions from them

I do love the idea of Alastor as a pred, but as of right now I can’t think of how it would escalate to that kind of situation realistically unless they REALLY pissed him off or something. Maybe I’ll think of something after the finale tonight, lmaoooo

[angels-and-demons]

Incorrect quote!

Tw for mention of mental health and panic attacks

Nico: Toby, what are you doing here, and-! Who is this? What even is this place?!

Toby: Nico, if you could just-!

Mira: Tobias, it's okay. You're in a safe place here. And Nico? Stop pressuring him. He can't answer if you keep doing that.

[Nico closes his mouth and falls quiet. Mira nods]

Mira: thank you. Now, Toby?

[Toby takes a deep breath]

Toby: Nico, Doctor Baudelaire is my therapist. She helps me with my mental health.

Mira: Toby has been seeing me twice a month for the past few years. Sometimes more than that, but that's the baseline.

Nico: ...go on.

Toby: my normal appointment isn't for another week, but...

[Toby takes a deep breath. Nico puts a hand on his back to comfort him]

Toby: ...the other day, when I was on a job, I... had a panic attack. And... a pretty bad one, at that.

[He tries to laugh]

Toby: so... I had to see her for an emergency visit. Just to, you know, touch base and get myself sorted.

Mira: He's really quite good when it comes to our visits and his emotional regulation.

[Toby nods. Nico looks at him, concerned]

Nico: Toby... I'm so sorry. But why didn't you tell me? I could've helped you-!

[Toby groans. He rubs his face with his hand in frustration. He has a few jerk-like tics and makes a popping sound with his mouth]

Mira: Toby, remember: we use our words.

Toby: right, doc. Anyway...

[He turns to Nico]

Toby: Nico... babe, I didn't tell you because whenever I had one previously, you'd just... treat me with kid gloves.

Nico: what? No, I didn-!

[Mira holds a hand up]

Mira: Nico, this is Toby's time to talk. You’ll have your turn. Let him do so.

[Nico nods]

Nico: right, sorry. Go on, Tobes.

Toby: ...thank you. As I was saying... when I told you about them before, you'd just... act like I was fragile - as if I'd break if you even touched me wrong. And so... I just didn't.

[Toby sighs. He knows what he's done is kinda fucked up]

Toby: whenever I'd have one - and you weren't around? - I'd phone Mira and have a session. I'd just... bottle it up and not let you know.

[Nico's eyes well up. Toby looks shocked]

Toby: Oh, babe... no, I'm so sorry...

Nico: honey... I've been worried about you for months. I was terrified that you'd... started... again. Or if, you know, you were coming off of your meds for some reason. Or - whatever. I don't know. And it's been driving me crazy.

Toby: it has?

Nico: every night, Tobes.

Mira: Toby, now you talk.

[Toby takes a deep breath]

Toby: I understand that you have been... concerned about me. And I apologise for not telling you sooner...

[Mira nods. Toby goes on]

Toby: ...but, I cannot deal with you patronising me - or, or making me feel like I'll break if you say the wrong thing.

Nico: Okay. I'm sorry for... Well, for making you feel like that. I... I don't see you as this, this... breakable thing. I just... I love you, Toby. And I want to keep you safe.

Toby: I love you too, babe. But, I've had panic attacks before, and I'll very likely have them again.

[Toby takes another deep breath]

Toby: I don't need you to protect me from them. I just need you to help me feel present when I do have them. I need to feel heard, not just seen.

Mira: this is good. Really good. I feel like we've really started a dialogue here. Now, Mister Di Angelo, if you will: I, for one, would adore finishing my session with Toby.

[Nico looks at Toby. Toby grins nervously]

Toby: I won't be too long.

Nico: alright.

Mira: Oh, and if you just have a word with Cookie - up at the desk, I can try and squeeze the two of you in for a couple's session next week.

Nico: couples session? Like, counselling? Isn't that for, like, failing marriages?

Mira: Oh, heavens, no. Look, couples therapy and couples counselling can help you both keep on top of your mental healths. It provides you with a safe space to discuss your feelings, and a third party to allow for any outside opinions. Even my husband and I have our own counsellor. It just... helps make sure you're both on the same page, alright?

Toby: alright, Doctor B!

[Nico nods]

Nico: Yeah, alright.

[Toby pecks Nico on the cheek]

Nico: see you in... half an hour?

Toby: maybe even less.

[uglyimagines]

𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐄 - 𝐋𝐀𝐁𝐘𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐇

(based off the taylor swift song obvs, this is my first imagine lol in forever so ya lol enjoy - written from female perspective and majorly fluffy)

Y/N - your name

C/S - call sign

𝐈𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐦𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐖𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐧, 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡, 𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩, 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐮𝐭, 𝐈'𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞, 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐈 𝐚𝐦 𝐨𝐟 𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐬, 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐭, 𝐈𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭.

Tears threatened my eyes as I watched Rooster's name vanish from the radar. I felt eyes rush in my direction across the control room, and that's when it started. My anxiety was always there no matter how much I tried to control it, especially in front of the others during training. Rooster was one of the first to notice, along with Bob and Phoenix. I guess it was hard not to notice, the way I'd bite my fingernails and mess with my hands if I felt uncomfortable in a certain situation. I've had anxiety for most of my life, and suffered many of panic attacks because of it. First, I felt the shaking. In my hands, in my legs, in my arms. And eventually everywhere. I stormed out of the control room, and found myself in the women's restroom. I locked myself inside a cubicle, put the seat down and sat. I felt the tears streaming now, wiping them away with my free hand as the other held my forehead. My head was spinning, as my world was collapsing around me.

-

My first few panic attacks I went through alone, not knowing at the time what they were. This one though, was very different. I had just finished training with Maverick and the others, and was in the break room making some coffee. I stood up from the couch and made my way to the coffee pot in the kitchen, opening a cupboard and pulling out a mug as I did so. I reached for the coffee pot and noticed my hands were trembling, and then everything went dizzy. I instinctively put my hand to my forehead, trying to regain myself. Then I noticed my breathing had quickened.

I shook my head quickly, making the dizziness worse. "No, please. Not here." I said under my breath.

I tried to put the mug on the side of the kitchen counter, failing to notice how far off I had been from the counter top. It fell to the floor and shattered. I took a few steps back, obviously in shock. Then it just all came at once, that swallowing feeling of worthlessness. I fell to the floor and cradled my kness to my chest, hoping to be able to ride this one out sooner rather than later. I laid my head in between my arms, my breathing quick and my body shaking. That's when I heard the door open.

"Hey C/S! You did pretty good out there-" Rooster's voice filled the room, walking in to the room and shutting the door behind him as he looked around for me. That's when I heard him stop and run to my side. "Y/N! Y/N! Look at me!"

I lifted my head from my kness and looked at him. His look was at first concerned, but slightly softened when I looked up. He took my hands in his and brushed a piece of hair behind my ear.

"Just breathe okay, I'm right here." He said, bringing me some sort of comfort as his blurry form became less blurry.

I shook my head, my breathing becoming more rash and I could feel the sweat dripping on my face. "I can't" I mouthed, feeling tears brim at my eyes.

He smiled. "Of course you can. Look, I'll do it with you. Breathe in," I took a deep breath in, and held it there. I saw he had taken one too, bringing me some feeling of support. "1, 2, 3... And out." I breathed out, my breath shaky still as I looked up at the ceiling for a moment or two. "1, 2, 3..."

We did that for what felt like an hour, but was probably shorter. I felt my dizziness go when I opened my eyes on the last breath out, and looked at him. My breathing had stabilised and my hands were no longer shaking in his. He smiled at me, and I smiled back.

"Thank you." I said, and he nodded, standing up and offering a hand out to me. I took it and pulled myself up.

"Still want that coffee?" He joked gesturing to the broken mug on the floor, and I chuckled.

-

𝐔𝐡 𝐨𝐡, 𝐈'𝐦 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐎𝐡 𝐧𝐨, 𝐈'𝐦 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧, 𝐎𝐡, 𝐈'𝐦 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐈 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧, 𝐇𝐨𝐰'𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝.

I could feel it all swallowing me up at once, just like that one time with Rooster in the break room. I sat up from my current position in the cubible, putting my hands on my kness to try and steady them. I breathed in, his words ringing in my head.

"Breathe in, 1, 2, 3..."

I held it, before breathing out and holding for 3. I did this for what felt like ten or fifteen minutes, before I felt someone open the door to the women's restroom.

"Y/N? You in here?"

I recognised the voice, it was one of the people from the control room. I regained myself and opened the door to the cubicle. The person turned to look at me, with a shaken appearance.

"You might want to see this." They said, and I furrowed my brows at them in confusion.

-

I followed them back into the control room, watching as Rooster's name had appeared back online again on the radar. I stumbled back a bit in shock, looking to Cyclone who simply nodded. I felt my world slowly starting to rebuild in that moment. Phoenix had had an inkling and Hangman had teased me for it for months, but I had to contain my feelings for Rooster because of the mission and for how I simply thought it wouldn't work out. I had feared for his safety and if he never came back, and I would have to make myself realise that that could be a possibility. I wouldn't wish for it at all, I just knew it could happen. I looked to Cyclone again, asking for permission to go up to the top. He again, simply nodded. I quickly thanked him and made my way up.

-

I watched as the plane landed and Maverick and Rooster made their way out into the crowd that had surrounded them on the top. I stood a bit back from the crowd, admiring the pilot who I realise I had come to grow feelings for. He smiled among the crowd, giving high fives and cheering. I laughed at that. He began looking across the crowd, left and right until his eyes landed on me. He smiled, and made his way through the crowd towards me, bumping into and weaving his way through people as he did. He finally reached the back and made his way towards me.

He looked down at me as I was much smaller than him. I smiled, taking it in.

"You came back." I struggled out.

"Yeah well," He began, looking down at his feet before looking back at me. "I guess I had someone to come back to."

[semioticpenguin]

So love me like you do

For the past few years, as I slowly crept toward forty, I thought I had reconciled myself to being alone. I'd moved back home, out of the city where the gays congregate and back to the suburbs were the gays do not. I bought my childhood home, offered to take care of my parents, got a cat to help ease the loneliness, and for a while, I've felt... okay about it. Not thrilled, not happy, maybe not even content. 'Resigned' has too negative a connotation, but perhaps that's the word that fits best: I'd become resigned to my lot in life and to the future it promised.

But tonight I watched Red, White, and Royal Blue, a film based on a book from 2019 that I'd read and adored, and when the credits rolled, I felt... devastated. I sat in my recliner, my cat in my lap, and all those emotions I thought I had put behind me rushed to the surface: anger, despair, desperation, disbelief, jealousy, worthlessness, pain. So much pain. I turned off my Roku, got off the recliner, and went to pee. "This will pass," I thought to myself. "This too will pass."

But it didn't. It hasn't. My mood had curdled, and there is no going back. I've staved off the burning waves of a panic attack twice tonight, something I haven't had to do for over a decade. And now I still can't shake these terrible thoughts, most of which come attached to images from the movie (Alex and Henry on the hammock together or dancing slow in the museum or in bed after making love, Alex's arms wrapped around Henry like safety, like shelter, like home.): "You're going to die alone, unloved and unwanted." "You will never have that love, that affection, that physical touch." "It's too late for you -- there is no one -- you have no hope, you abandoned all hope when you entered here."

But this isn't even about the movie, which was fine. Yes, the man who played Alex is incredibly, painfully hot, and the one who played Henry vacillates so adorably between damaged (I'm a Taurus) and vulnerable that I'd probably propose to Nicholas Galitzine on the spot if I ever saw him, but I've seen romantic comedies before. I know what happens, what's going to happen. Hell, I watched the second season of Heartstopper last weekend, and I was fine! (To be fair, that also upset me, for different reasons that I will perhaps discuss in a later post, but it was a fleeting sort of sadness, nostalgia for a past I never had and never will. Not this echoing void where a contented present and a hopeful future should be.)

I don't know what happened. I don't know why I feel like this again, why it's started after so many years of numbness verging on acceptance. So now I've been listening to the Carpenters love songs all night, and I've moved on to my Sad playlist on Spotify. The song "Take Me Home" by Delta Goodrem kills me -- that desperation, that exhaustion, that need -- it fits me right now the way snow fits winter or ice fills a broken heart.

The only thing I can think to do to help is to write again. I miss my old LiveJournal, the community of perfect strangers I'd met there who read the incredibly detailed, often melodramatic daily posts I made about my insignificant, inconsequential life. I've tried journaling privately, but I never stick with it -- perhaps here, even if no one hears my cries, the hope that someone will will keep me going.

[hailxhydra]

the more you say (the less I know)

By @hailxhydra​ for @iwritedumbshit​

via @friendly-neighborhood-exchange

Rating: Gen

Relationships: Tony Stark & Peter Parker, Steve Rogers & Peter Parker

Characters: Peter Parker, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers

Summary:  TONY STARK IS DEAD. The words were plastered on the front page of every newspaper across the world. Tony Stark, the resident genius, billionaire, playboy, and philanthropist, was dead. Completely, irrevocably, unchangeably, dead.

Or was he?

OR

After the events of Endgame, Peter Parker decides he has to go back in time to save his mentor’s life, finds out that Tony wasn’t everything Peter thought he was, and chaos ensues.

“You sure about this, kid?” Steve asked Peter, coming up from behind him to clasp his hand on his shoulder. Looking out into the crystal clear lake and the surrounding forest, Peter gulped, trying to get rid of that unsettling feeling at the bottom of his stomach bubbling up until it overflowed, and he broke down right in front of everyone.

“What?” he said, swallowing the lump at the back of his mouth. Turning to face Steve, he shook off the hand on his shoulder, which immediately went straight into the pockets of his black pants. He glared at Steve, though obviously not in a malicious way. He was met back with a blank stare. The impassiveness of it was relieving; Peter didn’t need any more emotion from anyone, let alone the person who had abandoned his mentor for years, without a goodbye, nor some contact information. The bleak, vacant gaze held a sort of comfort for him, being something steady, something that he could hold on to while all around him, there was chaos. It was a lifeboat.

“Look, we’ve all been there. Believe me, I know what it feels like. I was in ice for seventy years. I lost everyone. But I had people to help me through it. You do, too. You don’t have to do this.”

“What’re you trying to get at?” he blatantly asked, rolling his eyes and turning back to the lake, the calm lake, the lake that had absolutely no problems, the lake that was steadfast and balanced, the lake that was everything that Peter wanted to be. “Are you implying that I might do something? I can’t change what happened either way, what with the implications, plus, the Grandfather Paradox is a bunch of bullshit, it just creates an alternate timeline, like with blue robot lady one and two, and anyway, how would that work without any local quantum interference? It’s crazy, I mean like-”

“I’m not talking about the science behind it. I can’t know what you think, but, looking from the outside, it is pretty clear what you want to do. Now, I don’t know if anyone else realizes it, and maybe it’s just because we’re so similar that I would have taken the same line of action, but you have family here. People who care about you. Just, spend a few minutes mulling over your decision. You have to be completely sure before you do anything drastic,” Steve said, starting to walk away after he was done.

“You’re really big on monologues, aren’t you? It’s a very 40s vibe you give off!” Peter called after him, a smile gracing his face in this tough moment. Steve just made a peace sign in return, his back still facing him, and continued his conversation with Sam. He looked around, taking in the serenity of the lake house. Tony had bought it during the Blip, so Peter had never gotten around to seeing it with him. He quietly stepped inside, making sure not to make any noise as to give away his position. He wanted solitude, without anyone barging in every few minutes to check in on him, or to offer him some juice, or to whack his head with a newspaper (although that last one was mainly Sam and Bucky, and he didn’t know from where they even got the endless supply of newspapers).

The inside was nice. A change of scenery from the dark outfits everyone wore outside. Built almost entirely of walnut wood, the lake house served as a reminder that he would never get those five years back. The five years, in which everything had changed. He wondered if May had gotten dusted, too. If she had gotten married again, or had a kid. They didn’t have much time before the funeral to catch up, always being whisked away to talk to one person or another. He led his fingers across the panels of wood, taking in the peacefulness inside. Feeling a presence creeping up behind him, he swiveled around to punch the person in the gut. He widened his eyes when he realized who it was.

Bucky Barnes, aka the Winter Soldier, aka the White Wolf, aka the most dangerous man on Earth, was keeling over, hands on his midsection, looking like he was about to puke.

“OhmygoshI’msosorry,” Peter rushed, hands outstretched, but stopping in mid-air, as if he was rethinking his decision to help him up.

“Come on, kid. Why do you have to do that to a hundred-year-old man? Ever heard of ‘respect your elders’?” he groaned, stabilizing himself by putting his hands on Peter’s shoulders and lifting himself up.

Peter felt his cheeks heat up and turn scarlet before muttering a small, “I said I’m sorry.”

“What I came here to say was before you so rudely knocked me over, was that I think Bruce is firing up the machine. He wants you to suit up and get ready. It’ll be ready any time now,” Bucky said, giving a Chesire cat-like grin before turning away to talk to someone Peter didn’t know.

Peter laughed and shouted, “That wasn’t a good pun at all!”

Bucky looked back at him, gave him the middle finger, and yelled back, “I’m a hundred-year-old assassin, give me a break!”

Peter shook his head and turned to look at the suit in his hands. The suit itself was grey, with streaks of red running down it (the Avengers were very fashionable, to say the least). It had a leathery texture, but not quite leather; it was comfortable, yet effective at the same time. Most importantly, it would protect him from the quantum energy and radiation that came with time travel.

Looking at it, Peter felt unworthy, but, wearing it, he felt like he could do anything that he ever wanted. He felt like he was an Avenger. It wasn’t like anything else in the world. It was special. It was distinctly his, not anyone else’s; his.

“My wittle spidey is all gwown up now!” May exclaimed, smiling at Peter in his new time-traveling suit.

“May, I’m not a baby!” he pouted, stomping his feet on the ground, purposely acting immaturely. “I’m not your ‘wittle spidey’! I’m a grown-up kid!”

“Whatever, it’s fine. Just come with me. They’re all ready for your big superhero entrance.”

Getting there was a long hike. For some absurd reason, Bruce had decided to put the time travel machine smack in the middle of a dense forest, and it took quite a while, even in his super suit, to reach the destination.

“Peter? You ready?” Bruce (Professor Hulk) asked. He put his big green hand on his shoulder, and Peter felt something break there.

He suppressed a cry and said weakly, “Yeah.”

“You sure about that? One of us could do it.”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

Bruce gave a soft smile and led Peter over to the launching pad.

“So what do I have to do again?” he asked.

“Just stand there. Make sure you’re holding the stones and the hammer. You need to return those things at the exact time they were taken. If you don’t, it’ll-”

“Create another timeline, I know. That’s all I have to do. Just return the stones. To the right time. Okay, let’s do this.”

He stretched out his hands and legs and went to go and stand at the pad. Surveying the crowd, he caught a certain someone’s eye. Steve took off his hat, bowed down, and smiled at him. He gave a small thumbs up to Peter, reassuring him that this was the right decision. Peter cleared his throat, nodded a few times, and gave Bruce the signal.

“Five… four… three… two… one.”

“How long will it take?” Sam asked. “I need a break.”

Bruce looked at his monitor in confusion. Typing something into it, he showed Sam the calculations. Sam just raised his eyebrows.

“I’m not some science genius. You’re going to have to explain it to me.”

“He was supposed to come back in two seconds. He should’ve been back by now.”

“What?” he asked, although there wasn’t anything he could do, and he knew that. Steve smiled a bit and turned around to face the wilderness. Unfortunately, this action did not go unnoticed by Bucky. He lunged towards him and pulled him up by the collar. He raised his eyebrows to his hairline and gave Bucky a bewildered look.

“What did you do?” he threatened. Steve gave a smirk and raised his hands, surrendering. He shrugged (which was really hard, given Bucky was still holding onto his collar), and slowly took Bucky’s hands off of him. Once they were completely off (and into his jacket’s pockets), Steve huffed.

“I did nothing, Buck. It was his decision, not mine.”

“Will you tell us where he is?” Sam asked, coming up from behind them. Steve simpered, looking Sam straight in the eye.

“No, I’d rather not.”

“I know you did something you little piece of-”

December 16, 1990 || New York City

The streets of New York City were bustling with people trying to do last-minute Christmas shopping, the shops illuminated with strings of Christmas lights. Although the rain dampened the mood (in more ways than one), the crowd hurried from store to store, trying to acquire the perfect gift for their friends and family, brightening the otherwise bleak scene.

The women, clad in their voguish outfits of pantsuits and tinted oval sunglasses, directed their tired husbands to different toy stores, presumably to buy a set of some knick knacks and trinkets for their children. The little boys and girls dragged their mothers and fathers to various windows, pointing at the numerous playthings propped up in the front.

The teenagers, dressed in baggy sweatpants and flannel jackets and too many chains to look good, looked bored as hell, and were smoking in some neglected corner in the adjacent alleyway. They laughed, sending puffs of smoke billowing into the atmosphere, seeming so carefree in that small moment.

Muffled conversations could be heard throughout the streets, though no one was paying much attention to the stifled voices, choosing to focus on the more fortunate aspects of life. A man, speaking into his phone in hushed whispers, hugged his briefcase tight to his chest and sent out panicked glances if anyone came in close proximity to him. A woman, an unlit cigar hanging from her mouth, clutched her handbag, a small purse dog whining in it, and grinned at any unsuspecting young man that came near her. A young couple, looking like they were physically connected to each other, walked along the jam-packed street, sneaking in kisses as if they weren’t allowed to be seen in public with one another. There were, in total, at least a few hundred people in that small street, all trying to get away from the stress of day-to-day life.

Although it was a lighthearted scene down on the streets below the towering skyscrapers, the rain poured down onto the throng of people, the immense clouds covering the full moon, giving the place an eerie aura.

In an alleyway off to the side of the square, Peter dazedly woke up, scratching his eyes, just recovering from the gripping experience of time traveling. He had returned the infinity stones to their particular places and time periods. The soul stone to Vormir in 2014, the Tesseract to that old SHIELD laboratory in 1970, the time stone to the Sanctum and the Ancient One in 2012, the power stone to Morag, the Aether to Asgard in 2013, and the mind stone to the oblivious Hydra agents at the Avengers Tower in 2012. So, as you can see, it had been a really long day for Peter.

He groaned and raised his hands, only to find them covered in dirt and some wet, slimy substance he couldn’t remember the name of. It wasn’t just his hands; the whole alleyway was covered in this substance.

“Ew,” he groaned, making sure not to be loud, so that the horde of people wouldn’t see him. That would cause multiple complications in Peter’s plan, probably resulting in him being sent to an orphanage because they couldn’t find his parents. It could also be more drastic and he could end up in some government facility because his name wasn’t on any of their rosters. He might also have been classified as an alien, and that would definitely thwart his mission.

The pitter patter of the rain woke Peter up from his delusional fantasy, and, putting his palms on the damp, muddy ground, he stood up. Tip toeing out of the alley, he surveyed his surroundings in order to make sure no one was watching him, and wandered out onto the street. People shouldered their way through the crowd, always looking behind their back to see if someone was following them. Peter did the same, though for different reasons than them.

He walked along the street for a while, getting whisked away by the crowd. There wasn't really a place to go for him right now, so he just wandered around, window shopping (though he had absolutely no money), trying not to think about the past Christmas he spent with Tony, eating food until they threw up, and opening the presents they gifted each other, Rhodey, Pepper, and Aunt May.

There were a lot of… characters on the road. Some of them smiled at him very creepily, staring at him as though he were something enjoyable to eat for supper, and others were confused as to why a child, dressed up in a weird suit without his parents, was solemnly walking along the boulevard - Halloween had passed two months ago, and it was now Christmastime. One couple was kind enough (or evil enough) to hand him a Hershey’s chocolate bar. Not those bite-sized little ones that Peter used to get from Delmar’s or that one grocery shop in Queens. This one was king-sized. It could’ve lasted Peter at least a month if he were back in Queens in his apartment.

A sense of dread overtook him. The mission. He couldn’t fail it. No, he had to prove to himself that he was ready.

But what if he wasn’t?

He pushed his way through the mob of people. They stared back at him, eyes wide in shock. He didn’t care. He sprinted all the way across the road to the other side of it, shoving away the people who got in the way. He reached the empty wall, feeling the bile rise in his throat.

He puked onto the wall. The people moved away from him. His heart pounded in his chest. Blood throbbed in his ear. Holding onto the wall, he sobbed. The world seemed to turn fuzzy, and everything he saw was distorted, as if he were in a VR game that was malfunctioning. The wall in front of him turned wobbly. Instead of a straight wall, it was now a curved structure. The ground underneath him seemed to give out. He was falling. He was falling to his death. He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t call for help. No one wanted to help him. Another round of bile seemed to erupt from him, and he puked even more of his lunch onto the wall. The world was ending. The world was ending, and he couldn’t do anything about it.

He couldn’t save people from dusting. It was his responsibility to save them. People were counting on him, and he let them all down. He let Mary and Richard down. He let Ben down. He let Aunt May down. He let Mr. Stark down.

He could hear people in the distance, calling for help. He also heard an indistinct sound of laughter. A familiar sound. This sound, unlike the multiple other people screaming, he knew. He knew this sound.

“Mr Stark?” he mumbled from force of habit, pausing to throw up for the third time. All the sound ceased. The tears didn’t, though. They continued flowing in wet, fiery streaks down his cheeks. He could see the crowd make a partition, though his vision was seriously warped. A teenager, probably around his age, walked through the space. He could hear the crowd whispering and pointing at him, although the other man paid no attention. He had to squint his eyes to see him, choking back a sob. He couldn't embarrass himself more than he already did. He cried violently, and the man crouched down and cocked his head to the side. Almost, but not quite, as if he was observing him. As if he was some experiment in a glass cage.

He sobbed harder, and he retched, wishing something would come out so the man would move away from him. The man just tilted his head to the other side and squinted his eyes. He looked at all the other people and shooed them away, and they obliged. Peter and the man were left in solitude, a small sort of bubble forming around them, giving them some peace and quiet.

“How do you know me?” he asked in a low, menacing voice that made Peter cry even more.

“I don’t know!” he bawled. “I’m sorry!”

The man picked Peter up by the arm and looked him straight in the eye. He couldn’t see well through the tears in his eyes, but the man looked truly scary. He heard some shouts in the background, cheering the man on. He grunted and threw Peter onto the ground, walking away to his group of friends.

Peter tried to pull himself up, but, through his severe panting and sobbing, he could not sit upright. He then resorted to lying on the murky ground (on which there were some questionable substances). Gasping for air, Peter tried to calm down.

Key word: tried.

The tears never stopped flowing. The memories didn’t, either.

Memories of Mary and Richard. Of how his last words to them were, “I hate you!”’ before they boarded that damn plane.

Memories of Ben. Of how he died in his arms, bleeding out from the gunshot wound, while he couldn’t do anything to save him.

Memories of how he left Mr. Stark for five years. Five freaking years. And, just as he came back from the dead, Mr. Stark had to go and sacrifice himself for the universe.

Lying there, on the ground, the crowd walking around him to avoid stepping on the child, he fell into a deep sleep, unbothered by the disgusted looks thrown at him by the supposedly “posh” people of New York City.

[enaraism]

kiss it better!

summary: peter has a breakdown when a crime scene hits too close to home, and he needs to be reminded that he can't save everyone.

a/n: idk if i LOVE this tbh. reblogs and comments are appreciated!

content: she/her pronouns used, hurt/comfort, mentions of death and car accidents, implied panic attacks?? (i'm so sorry if i didn't write it properly btw, i've only had a few mild panic attacks and i based it on that), sort of an au where gwen didn't die (she's not mentioned here at all) bc i just think that peter would have a very bad and different reaction if gwen did die.

word count: 1.7k

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»»————-　　 ♡︎ ————-««

red and blue lights flickered all over the streets, almost melting against his red and blue skin-tight spandex, and peter watched in a haze as they jumbled messily in crystalised bokeh. the broken cries of a child, shouted orders of paramedics, the crispy chatter of a police radio and the thumping of a few dozen heartbeats all reached peter’s ears and added up to a sickening and constant ringing that sounded awfully similar to how it did when he lost his uncle ben.

he almost doubled over in the sudden swarm of nausea that came over him when he saw the hunched over figure of a boy who looked barely 12 sobbing over his now-announced-dead father, but stopped himself last minute because the city workers had enough to clean up already. the sight was so painfully familiar to him — every now and then he'd get deja-vu of back when it was him crouched over the only father-figure he ever had. and just like last time, it was his fault. it always had been.

no, no it's not, i can't save everyone, he reminded himself, squeezing his eyes shut and trying to visualise those words. he would not fall back down that rabbit hole again. absolutely not.

then why does everyone around you die?

why did you lose both of your parents and your uncle if it wasn't your fault?

…

who’s next?

he needed to get out of here. fast.

he blinked away his tears and willed his vision to get sharper, then attached a web to the nearest building and started to swing in the general direction of his girlfriend’s house, because he knew this was not a good time to be alone with his thoughts.

peter tried to ground himself while swinging, which proved difficult when all he could feel and hear was the loud, whistling wind working against him, but it still helped quiet the deafening ringing in his ears and soon enough he was standing on her apartment’s fire escape.

he peeked through the window, feeling his breath catch up in his throat once more when he saw that she was sleeping, curled into her blankets and soft snores falling from her lips. no, he backtracked, i can't do this to her. i can’t put her in danger — he was crawling backwards on the fire-escape, only half aware of his movements — i can’t pull her down with me. i’m not good for her. what if she —

and suddenly he was jumping up, a hand going up to clutch his heart as the sound of something shattering joined the constant ringing in his ears that never seemed to cease.

fuck. he'd broken her potted plant that she always kept on the fire escape. pushed it right down to the ground in his haste of trying to leave.

maybe he could still —

“peter?”

nevermind.

he watched sheepishly as her face peeked through the curtains, one hand rubbing her sleep-riddled eyes and the other pushing up the window as quietly as she could.

he tried to smile.

“hey, sorry about that i— uh… i don’t know. i’m sorry. i promise i’ll make it up t—” he croaked.

“peter, hey, it's okay,” she reached for his gloved hand, rubbing her fingers over it comfortingly, “come in.”

she watched as he gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head and crawled in.

as soon as he was inside, she pulled his mask off, eyes softening as she took in his disheveled form and the look in his eyes. he looked hopeless. crushed.

“sweetheart,” she cooed, gently wiping off the fresh swarm of tears that pooled in his eyes and overflowed down to his cheeks, “what happened?”

she knew something was wrong the moment she heard the crash. it wasn't like peter to be this clumsy this late at night (she knew he tried his hardest to not wake her up unless he absolutely needed to) unless he was really banged up, and she knew from a quick look-over that whatever it was, it wasn't a physical pain.

he didn’t say anything, and she could see that he was trying his hardest to not fall into her arms, his arms stiffening by his sides and eyebrows furrowing in concentration.

she frowned, and reached out to touch his forearm, feeling it stiffen just a little more as he steeled himself, before whatever resolve he had came crumbling down and he was suddenly pulling her roughly against his chest and sobbing his heart out.

she let out a breath of relief at his surrender, and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him in and kissing the side of his head.

they stayed like that for a while — him clutching on to the back of her shirt for dear life, chest shaking with sobs, ears still ringing — and her fingers gently raking through his hair as she whispered sweet nothings to his ear. it took a while for him to calm down, around half an hour, but she didn't mind; couldn't care less about how long it took or how she had classes early in the morning tomorrow. the only thing that mattered was that peter was here, ever the broken mess and that she had to pick the pieces back up, help him be his usual self again.

“it was a hit-and-run,” he whispered into the still ambience of the room, almost afraid that if he spoke any louder it would ruin the calm environment they had built up, “t-the man had a child, y/n. he was a single father. and i—” he heaved a shuddering breath, trying to regain his composure but failing miserably. he was crying again, curling further into her and gripping her shirt almost painfully. somehow, they had ended up on the floor, her back pressed against the bed and peter’s arms around her.

“i couldn't save him,” he whimpered, and she knew instantly just how much this had affected him. peter always had a break-down everytime he couldn't save someone, but this particular incident had hit too close to home.

“hey, look at me,” she grabbed his face tenderly, “it wasn't your fault, peter. you can't save everyone.”

he nodded hesitantly, and it was obvious from the way his eyes still lingered on the floor that he didn't fully believe it.

she sighed.

“okay, can you tell me how many people you have saved?”

a beat passed.

he shook his head, the action so small that she wouldn't have known he even gave a response if she hadn't felt it against her chest.

“exactly! you saved countless people, my love. and they went back home to their children because of you. that counts, doesn't it?”

a soft nod.

“yeah?”

“yeah.” an even softer whisper.

she kissed the top of his head, “you're a vigilante, pete. not god. it wasn't your fault.”

a comfortable silence fell over the two. peter seemed to be carefully mulling the words over in his head, and his breathing seemed to be getting steadier. she almost wondered if he had fallen asleep.

“what if…” he started, unsure of his words, and suddenly his breathing was picking up again, “what if you need me and i can’t—” he hiccuped, “i can’t—”

“no, peter, don't even think about that.”

“but—”

“no. i know where this is going and i am not going to indulge in this conversation.”

“but i’m being realistic! you could be in danger! hell, you're probably already in danger. what if someone saw me coming in?” he was sitting up now, eyes looking around the room frantically.

“peter, it's 3 in the morning. you didn't fight any criminals today. no one saw you coming in.” she reached out to him again, hands rubbing up and down his arms in an attempt to comfort him, “breathe.”

“not today, maybe, but what if someone finds out my identity— i can’t—” he looked at her, wide, honeyed eyes welling up with tears again, “i can't lose you, y/n.”

her heart clenched painfully.

“and you won’t, peter,” she reassured him, “listen to me. realistically, i’m in danger of dying everyday. you’re in danger of dying everyday. anyone could die anyday. and what if the cause of my death isn't even an accident or a murder—” he fliched— “but something like… i don’t know, a heart attack. the point is, you can't control something like this, pete. so there's no point in making yourself anxious over this.”

he still looked hesitant. man, was this boy hard to convince.

“besides,” she added in an attempt to lighten the mood, “i know some mean fighting moves. i've seen you fight enough times on TV to know how to take down a criminal.”

he snorted, “i thought you were just looking at my ass.”

“what can i say, spidey? i'm a pretty good multi-tasker.” she winked.

a weak laugh escaped him, and she felt relieved that he was back to making jokes. she reached for him again, pulling him back towards her and resuming their previous position, with his head on her chest and her hands playing with his hair.

silence fell over them again, blanketing the both of them like mist on leaves right in the beginnings of dawn.

“thank you,” he said after a while, kissing the bare skin of her neck.

“you don't have to thank me,” she bought his face up towards her again, tracing the sharp edges of his jawline with her fingers, “i love you.”

a sharp inhale sounded, and peter somehow slumped even more in her arms, the words having even more of an effect on him than usual. the action earned him a giggle and a bump on his nose with hers, and he found himself reaching closer, lips desperately in search of hers.

she indulged him, and the kiss was nothing but the softest of touches, the gentlest flutter of skin against skin, but it left them both sated, and peter calmer than he was when he came here.

she got up soon afterwards, stretching her arms over her head with a yawn as the first rays of morning light filtered through the curtains. he found himself smiling for the first time that night then, nodding as she asked him if he wanted a glass of water before getting into bed.

peter knew there was no guarantee that he could keep y/n safe forever, but he also knew that leaving her wouldn't solve that. he forgot that sometimes, but peter guessed that only meant that she'd need to be here each time to remind him, and he supposed he could live with that.

[thelost-in-time]

Hi, Anon, just a note before we start. I'm sorry, but Tumblr posted my unfinished thing for me, so I had to start it from scratch again so it's not posted half completed. That's why the ask isn't shown as an actual ask and it is a screenshot. Other than that, I'm sorry and I hope you enjoy this nonetheless

Hi, Anon! You absolutely can, dw ^^ Also, I hope you don't mind, but I've added Xiao and Zen for my own comfort reasons

I'll just separate each character with some sort of dividers, so it's no problem ^^

Hey, I'm here, okay?

How Childe, Diluc, Xiao, Saeran, Saeyoung and Zen comfort a reader with anxiety.

Warnings: Anxiety, panic attacks, mental breakdowns, mentions of drowning and suffocation (comparison only), chest pain because of anxiety. Mysme is inaccurate bc I only finished Jumin and Jaehee's routes.

Reader is gn

Disclaimer: Everyone's anxiety is not the same. My anxiety may not be like yours. This post is based on my anxiety and how I hear my friends talk about their anxiety. Do NOT attack me over this. If you don't like how this turned out, move on instead of attacking me over it.

Genshin

Childe

He knows anxiety because he was in the Abyss at one point.

And he does have a family he needs to protect.

You have anxiety, but how severe your anxiety gets completely depends on your situation.

Sometimes your anxiety gets so bad that it's like you're drowning in an ocean, begging someone to save you.

Childe will be the one who will help you.

He has younger siblings, so he's learnt to be intuitive with the emotions of the ones he loves.

This includes you.

As far as Childe is concerned, you are part of his family.

Part of his world. I'll see myself out now.

So when Childe sees you placing a hand to your chest with a look of discomfort after a certain situation.

Chest pain caused by anxiety.

He knows.

He's quick to act.

He leads you away from the situation and pulls you into his arms, embracing you.

"Shh, it's okay, my love. I'm here. I'll try to help you feel better."

Anytime Childe sees your anxiety starting to build up, he has his gentle hold on you.

Hands caressing your arm, your back or your hands.

He's trying to help ease you a little.

If someone gave you a panic attack, then they'll come face to face with Childe's blade.

He is merciless to those who give you panic attacks, unless you ask him to show mercy.

"My love, how about later, we play with Teucer? He adores you."

Offers you anything to help you feel better, and Teucer's antics are one of them.

Because he knows about your anxiety, he always is prepared to take care of you.

Tries to ease your mind as best he can.

"But you'll never be alone."

Diluc

Master Diluc. Another one who had anxiety in the past after... events in his life.

Except, he wouldn't know about your anxiety unless you brought it up.

He didn't wanna assume anything, that's all, so he waited until you confirmed this with him.

When you do though, expect him to be prepared to help you at all times.

But sometimes, in the dead of night when Diluc is put and you're home alone, it's hell.

You're laying alone in your bed, thoughts swirling around your head.

And sometimes being alone with your thoughts aren't a good thing.

Negative thoughts flow into your mind, and suddenly, it's as if you're suffocating.

Trying to hold back the fiery hot tears that roll down your face, Diluc returns home to you.

"Something isn't right. I can feel it."

Rushes over to your room, not wanting to waste a single moment more.

And he finds you curled up in bed, gasping for air, having a breakdown.

Pulls you into his arms and holds you, making you rest your head on his chest.

"My love, listen to my voice, and my heartbeat. Don't think about anything else."

Tries to ground you by talking to you and letting you listen to the sound of his heart.

It hurts Diluc to see you like this, and he always does his best to ease your anxiety.

Anytime you feel your anxiety getting worse, Diluc is there.

He wraps his arms around you, or gives you his jacket if he can't hold you.

But he will drop everything to help you.

Will make you something to drink, like hot chocolate, tea, coffee, anything.

And if you need to fidget with something to ground your anxiety

Well, he buys you some sort of fidget toy.

Don't fight me. Those things help me through it sometimes bc my mind goes blank and I get grounded

Diluc also offers to do some relaxing activities with you to soothe your mind and your nerves.

"I'll be with you from dusk till dawn."

Xiao

Used to have anxiety as well. Have you not seen his karmic debt?

And yet you ground him when he needs you most.

So you better believe that he will return the favour tenfold.

He can see you're anxious with how you absent-mindedly tap your fingers against a surface.

He reaches out, holding your hand in his.

He has gotten used to initiating physical affection after seeing how happy you get.

When you're laying in bed at night, unable to sleep with thoughts swirling around your head.

Then Xiao will be the one to help you to bed.

Gives you a hoodie of his, helps you put it on actually, and helps you to bed.

Cuddles with you, whispering comforting words when your anxiety grows.

Takes you out on a walk through nature when your anxiety grows worse over days.

If you have allergies, he takes the path with less plants and stuff, but still amazing sights.

"I'm right here. I'll not leave your side. I'll help you get through this."

Anytime you start spiralling, he talks you through it, voice gentle and calm

Does all the things to soothe you that you do for him.

Never treats you as if you're incapable of doing things yourself though.

Lets you do things yourself unless you ask him for help, advising you to take it slowly.

Asks you to talk to describe some stuff to him when you're on the verge of breaking.

"What colour is the sky? What colour are my eyes? Can you match your breathing to mine?"

Alternatively asks you to count the number of objects backwards.

Basically find ten of one object, nine of another and so on.

Xiao mainly distracts you from what's growing your anxiety.

But he also gives you a lot of physical affection to help you calm down.

Super patient with you, despite seeming like an impatient person.

"Baby I'm right here."

Mystic Messenger

Saeran

Never played his or Saeyoung's routes, but he's my favourite from the two for some reason.

Saeran suffers anxiety even to this day. He has anxiety because of what he was subjected to.

So he understands you having anxiety.

Offers to introduce you to his psychologist so that your anxiety can also get a little bit better.

He knows it may not completely help, but he wants to help you even a little bit.

His psychologist helped him, so he's hoping you'll be helped as well.

However, if you're against the idea, he attempts to help you himself.

When you're feeling on the verge of an anxiety attack, he offers you to get ice-cream.

This man loves his ice-cream, so you don't even suspect its to help you.

Until it keeps happening when your panic attacks hit.

And if you're lactose intolerant? He finds an alternative that won't make you suffer.

Maybe he offers you some Honey Buddha Chips from Saeyoung's endless supply.

He likes stargazing with you, especially on nights when both your anxieties peak.

"The stars have a way of easing my anxiety. I hope it helps you as well."

Offers you his teddy bear to hold and cuddle when you're especially stressed during the day

Likes holding your hand. Feels it helps ground you both.

When your chest hurts, he gently squeezes your hand as a gentle reminder that he's there for you.

Times when your anxiety isn't as bad though, you can be certain to hear him say he's proud of you.

And when you recover from a panic attack, he still says he's proud of you.

Why? Because he knows how it feels.

"I'm proud of you. You're doing so well. You're managing, and that's great."

When you're calm, looks at you as if you're a work of art.

When you're breaking down, looks at you as if you're a delicate flower that needs care.

Always reminds you that he loves you, especially when you're super anxious.

"I'll hold you when things go wrong."

Saeyoung

Did you guys get married at the space station?

He's smart, but he's also stupidly oblivious.

So much for being a sentient boy.

I joke. In all honesty, he's probably trying to balance things, so he doesn't notice.

At first.

When he does notice you have anxiety (or when you finally tell him), he hugs you.

Holds you close, not saying anything for a few moments.

You think he's disappointed, and he is. Except it's in himself for not realising sooner.

After that? He pays close attention to you, not wanting you to spiral.

Anytime he sees someone about to prod at your anxiety to make it grow, he's there.

Pulls pranks on the person. Can't threaten them directly because he has a history.

When alone with the person who overwhelmed you, he's much less forgiving.

He is gentle, treating you as if you were a precious gem that could break.

Talks you through your nerves, cracking a few jokes to help you.

Alternatively though, he holds you close, letting you rest your head on his shoulder or chest.

You know how he cosplays?

He will cosplay for you to see you smile.

Cosplays as your comfort character.

Which means he may not need to cosplay bc he knows his your comfort character here.

"Defender 707 will defend you from your anxiety!"

Suggests activities that could help you.

Go outside? Take a walk? Exercise? Cuddles? Video games?

Maybe not the last one. Unless it's a slow paced game that's calming.

Asks Vanderwood to cook for you to make sure you don't forget to eat.

"I'll be with you from dusk till dawn."

Zen

You know how he has a bunch of rehearsals to do and rarely has time for himself?

Yeah, he always has time for you.

So when you message him saying your anxiety is worse today, he drops everything to go to you. The directors can't say anything, fearing he may quit, and their project will flop.

When he arrives at home, he has your favorite snacks on hand, ready to spoil you.

But on other days, when you're both together, he likes going to quiet places with you.

This is because not only is he famous, but also because he doesn't want to overwhelm you.

Feeds you and makes sure you're hydrated because he knows you forget sometimes.

Another one who buys you fidget toys to help ease your anxiety.

"You know I'm here, right? You don't have to struggle through this alone."

Alternatively, if you ever feel like you're a burden because of your anxiety, he has something else to say.

"You're not my burden. I'll never drop you. In fact, I don't mind having you here. Please never think you're a burden."

Funnily enough, this man was my first love in mysme, but I never had the time to get his route rip

Keeps you away from the media in fear of your anxiety worsening.

He wants to introduce you as his romantic partner, but he doesn't want any hate comments to you.

Also scared the attention will maybe make your anxiety worse.

So he keeps things between you both alone.

"God made a mistake when making us. I'm too beautiful and you're too perfect."

Smack him /j Just let him know you're fine when you're fine.

And let him know when you're not fine

Leaves you little notes around your house that tells you how much he loves you

Alternatively (again), if he's unable to come to you when you're anxious.

He has voice notes prepared to ground you, and notes (again) to ground you.

Is proud to have you as his romantic partner, and just wants you to be okay.

Likes spoiling you as well. Acts of service and gift giving. Wants to reward you for being so strong.

"Baby I'm right here."

End

Reblogs and friendly comments are welcome.

[littleoddwriter]

I can ask for a Brahms fanfic, where the reader buys a box of sodas or energy drinks to drink alone, but what would happen if our boy took them hidden too??

Inside Your Walls | Brahms Heelshire & GenderNeutral!Reader

Hey there! Sorry it took me so long to write it, I hope you like what I've done with it. (Ngl, it kind of ran away from me again, sorry, hope it's all right!) Thanks for the request! <3

summary; See above.

notes; Gender Neutral!Reader; Platonic; Reader takes care of Brahms' house; First Meeting (technically); Knives; Anxiety; Panic Attack; Horror Movie Trope; Moral Ambiguity; Sort of Happy Ending.

Reblogs > Likes. Thank you!

For the past couple of weeks, you've been taking care of the Heelshire's home while they'd been on vacation. It was an easy enough job that paid well; and since you really needed the money, you were more than happy to do it.

That was until they had introduced you to Brahms, a porcelain doll of a little, well-dressed boy. You thought it was a bit strange that they took it so seriously and wanted you to follow such specific rules and routines with that doll while they were gone; but you didn't want to judge them based on something so trivial. After all, this little hobby didn't hurt anyone and if they wanted you to take proper care of their doll, then you would do exactly that.

None of that had prepared you for what was to actually happen over the time you were supposedly alone in the house.

You didn't necessarily believe in ghosts and demons, the paranormal, but you were so certain that arguably heavy things - inanimate objects - didn't just move from one place to the other all on their own; it wasn't physically possible. Especially for a doll!

Yet every time you left the room for a couple of minutes, you put the doll on the chair, carefully positioning it and making sure it stays upright. And whenever you came back, it was nowhere to be seen, only for you to find it in a different room later on. It was strange and a little scary, too.

Time and time again, you tried to convince yourself that it was probably just your memory being untrustworthy, but the longer you've spent in the house, the less alone you felt. That, too, was something you proceeded to brush off as paranoia, which was induced by the fact that you'd been all by yourself in such a huge house for so long, then.

One Friday evening, though, you were grocery shopping and bought a box of soda cans for yourself. You were planning to have a movie marathon over the weekend to unwind and get that stupid paranoia out of your system by making yourself forget how alone you were with the help of fictional worlds and characters.

Having gotten yourself and the living room ready for the marathon, you were only missing the sodas, which you wanted to quickly grab from the counter, where you'd left them hours ago.

But they weren't there anymore.

Stopping short, you looked around the kitchen, scanned every surface, and let out a frustrated sigh as you threw your head back.

"Dude, seriously!" you exclaimed in exasperation.

Part of you really wanted to let it slide and start the movie marathon, so you could forget about how creepy it was that your whole box of soda cans was just gone all of a sudden. A different part of you - the angry, yet curious one - wasn't about to ignore it for once. It was just one too many times that one of your possessions suddenly vanished inside of this house and you wanted to know why or where they'd gone.

Grabbing a butcher knife, you slowly and quietly walked through the hallways and each and every room, looking into every nook and cranny. Your heart was beating rapidly and your hands were clammy, but you didn't care, since you were too determined to find out who or what was taking your stuff and moving things all the time.

After having examined every possible hiding spot, you were stumped. Nothing! You found absolutely nothing and nobody. But you weren't crazy - the box had been right there and then it wasn't, so somebody must have taken it.

While you were caught up in your own thoughts, you heard something creak from inside the walls - at least that was your best guess, given that it sounded close, but muffled, and all that surrounded you were walls.

Slowly, you stepped closer to the wall you suspected it to have been coming from, only to hear another, louder and much clearer creak. There was definitely something inside of the walls. You hoped it was a mouse or a racoon or something similar to that.

Then, the creaks continued, but they faded, so you continued to quietly follow them, holding the knife protectively in front of yourself; until, eventually, you stood right in front of the grandfather clock in the living room.

Holding your breath, you slowly put your ear against the wooden front of it. Faintly, you could hear something from inside that wasn't the clock, since that had been broken the entire time.

Carefully, you looked around the clock and pushed and pulled at what looked like a door. Once you had opened it, you looked up and yelped, taking a step back and holding the knife out in front of you.

"What the fuck?" you whispered, looking at the person that stood there, inside of the grandfather clock.

He was huge and therefore had to bend over when he stepped out of the clock's room. As you finally got a good look at him, you took in the thick, dark beard that peeked out from under the porcelain mask he wore. A mask that very much reminded you of Brahms The Doll. His clothes were dirty and clung onto him; and the low cut of his tank top showed off his chest hair. You were stunned.

"Who are you?" you asked eventually, still holding up your knife, in case he decided to attack you.

The man didn't say anything, but tilted his head in what looked like curiosity or even fascination. It was hard to get a good read on him, no thanks to the mask.

Then he took a step towards you, towering over you, and you couldn't remember ever having felt so scared for your life.

You flinched when he suddenly grabbed your wrist and took the knife out of your hand.

Your breath came out in quick, uneven puffs as panic made its way through your entire system.

Carelessly, the man placed the knife on the table and turned back to the clock. He was only bent over for a second or two and was facing you again too quickly for you to run. Surprised, you then had to realise that he held out your box of soda cans that had gone missing before.

"So you took them?" you dared to ask softly, looking between him and the sodas.

He only nodded.

"Right," you muttered. "Um, I'm sorry if I disturbed you? I was just looking for those," you continued, pointing at the box.

All too suddenly, he pushed the sodas into your hands.

“Can we watch movies together, Y/N?” he asked in a high-pitched, child-like voice.

He was watching you expectantly, then, waiting for your reply.

Swallowing thickly, you nodded. "Yeah, sure. Let's do that," you said, stumbling over your words a little, too shaken up by everything that has happened.

The rest of the weekend, you found out that Brahms The Doll really was just a doll and that the man inside the walls was the real Brahms, apparently. Your mind was still reeling a little, but despite that you found yourself kind of enjoying the time you've spent with him.

From then on, it also became a normal thing for you and you started to take care of Brahms and do whatever he told you to. Sometimes you weren't exactly sure if this was healthy at all or if you should be worried about any of it, but you really started to like him. So, you took the chance and let it all happen.

[iwadori]

Haikyu boys when they take a joke/prank too far (Iwaizumi,Daichi)

Word count: 1.9K

Genre:angst,fluff

AN: In the spirit of April Fools I tried to make my first work based on that I hope you enjoy!! (LOL I can’t actually believe this was the first thing I’ve ever written)

Iwaizumi:

“Okay so it’s April Fools Day who are we going to prank?” asked Makki “One of the first years?”

“Do we have to prank someone this year..” replied Iwaizumi “so childish”

“Iwa-Chan!” Oikawa said “Don’t be such a spoil sport.”

“Anyways, it can’t be a first year they’re boring to prank a first year coach will be mad at us, we need someone else.”

Just then, you enter the gym, catching their eye as you approach the group sitting on Iwaizumi’s lap “Hey babe, I can still come over to yours to study right?” you ask.

“Yeah of course, practice finishes early so I'll be there before you.” He said

“Alright, see you then bye babe, bye guys” you said, giving Iwaizumi a kiss on the cheek sauntering off and waving at Makki, Mattsun and Oikawa.

“bye Y/N!” They teasingly responded in unison making you laugh.

As they watched you leave, it seemed as if a lightbulb pinged off in all of their heads (besides Iwaizumi) realizing who would be a great person to prank.  

After a lot of convincing, they finally got Iwaizumi in on the ‘harmless’ plan, all they needed to do now is wait on your arrival.

You’re finally done with school after a long and tiring day of exams upon exams and wanting nothing more than to cuddle with your boyfriend (after he teaches you Pythagoras theorem of course.) You did think he was acting weird when you met him this morning in the gym and throughout break and lunch but you just concluded that it was because he was having an ‘off’ day.

You reached his house and used a copy of his key that he gave you to enter we just enter houses up in this bitch  calling out his name “Zumi-babe, I'm here...”  

“Lets get this shit over with” you said tiredly

Upon entering, you notice none of the lights being on or curtains drawn ‘odd’ you think. You go upstairs going straight to his room hopefully to find your boyfriend in his bed or on his Xbox or something. To your surprise his bedroom door was somehow locked shut (even though not having a lock on his door anyways.) Suddenly, you hear creaks slowly trailing up the stairs and an eerie feeling surrounds you... now you start to feel pretty panicked jiggling the door handle to Iwaizumi’s door as it’s practically the only place you can go.

AN: I hate what I’m writing rn but onwards we right

The footsteps on the stairs start to quicken, and you almost certain that you felt something brush pass your shoulder only adding onto the panic and anxiety that you already feel. Ok, the footsteps on the stairs are basically right near you, so doing the only logical thing you can do you body slam the ‘person’ on the stairs as you motherfuckin should  as tears fill your eyes and you pick up bag bolting through the front door, slamming it shut now in full tears and shakingly scared.

You look behind you and see Iwaizumi’s front door re-open and out comes the ‘iNFaMouS sEiJOh fOuR’ in tears... of laughter. It seems that the boys were in laughing fits that their prank ‘payed off’ getting a reaction out of you. You couldn’t see Iwaizumi’s reaction, but you didn’t care you were hurt, annoyed and wanting to get into your bed.

Once you get home, you decide to block your so called ‘friends’ who decided to make you scared shitless and ignored Iwaizumi’s messages asking “where were you today”.... the AUDACITY.  

The next day, the boy’s seemed to realize the consequences of their actions after spending the whole day trying to get your attention only to be straight up ignored. Iwaizumi is immensely regretful after all his efforts to try talking to you were denied, he decided after his practice he was going to get you to talk to him or at least get you to listen to his apologies on what happened yesterday evening.

You left your clubroom and made your way to the school gate to go home.

“Y/N!” shouted Iwaizumi touching your shoulder making you flinch ‘wow did we really scare her that bad?”  

“What do you want iwa?” You asked very agitated

“Y/N I just want to apologize for yesterday, since it was April fools day and all the boys really wanted to prank someone and I-it just happened to be-”

“It just happened to be me. Right?” you interrupted “Gosh Iwaizumi, I was really scared.. I already had a tiring day and all I wanted was my boyfriend to teach me the stupid Pythagoras Theorem and cuddle me afterwards, but no you and your friends just had to be dicks for a day” you turn around planning to walk away before he grabs you again  

“Wait! Just wait y/n, im sorry and I wont ever prank you like that again” he pleaded

“.. and i’ll help you study?” he added pulling the sweetest face of all time to try and convince you  

“ugh, fine stop pulling that face... and you better teach me Pythagoras Theorem” you said rolling your eyes

“yeah yeah whatever you say y/n” he said pulling you under his arm and walking in the direction of his house.

A/N: WOW I DID NOT like the way this turned out but its my first official thing that I wrote hopefully HOPEFULLY MY WORK IMPROVES (I THINK IT WILL) SO please join me on this ‘ride’ in improving my work  

Daichi:

You decided this morning that you were NOT going to participate in your annual April Day Fool’s prank with Tanaka and Noya... only because of your not-so new boyfriend Daichi saying he didn’t need his teammates corrupting you any longer so you decided to not get involved. With that being said you wouldn’t even think of your boyfriend pulling a prank on you so you didn’t think you’re getting pranked today.

In the gym, the boys were doing the usual: Hinata and Kageyama running after eachother, Tanaka and Noya oogling Kiyoko, Tsukishima listening to music, Yama and Yachi going over club schedules whilst Daichi sat with Sugawara and Asahi.

“So are you pranking anyone today?” sugawara asked

“Pranking someone, isn’t that a bit too juvenile suga?” Asahi replied

“Not you silly, Daichi” said sugawara “With Y/N on his arm they always have to stay on eachothers toes right..she’s a ‘jokester’ right?”

“...right?” Daichi hadn’t thought of it that way, he did know of all your joking escapades before you even got together and how you still liked to joke around now as you date.. He didn’t want you to think that you thought he was too boring for you ?

“Ok. What type of prank should I pull on her..”

Daichi, Sugawara and Asahi (who didn’t really contribute to Suga’s scheming) made a plan for you to meet him at the gym locker with the claims that he had a ‘surprise’ for you .. oh how he was wrong.

Daichi: meet me at the gym locker I have something to show you  

Y/N: Ok!! I’ll be there in 5 minutes

Daichi was nervous, and that was an understatement he didn’t want things to go left and have you thinking he couldn’t even do a simple prank. Once you got there, he saw heard you talking to Sugawara and Asahi outside the door about him wondering where he was in which Suga told you inside the locker room.

“Hey babe” you greeted “what's the occasion in why we’re in here?”

“I...uh..um I need to get something one second” Daichi spoke quickly and rushed out the room closing the door leaving you confused. Minutes passed, and you were now impatient and kinda scared since the room was dusty, dark and cold definitely not your place to be in. You tried texting Daichi but just your luck you have no service ://  

As time went on you tried opening the door but it was jammed shut no hope opening at all you forgot you left your bag outside which of course had your inhaler which did not help the sudden shortness of breath you started to get because of your asthma and claustrophobia. All you wanted was to get out of this room and talk to … Daichi.

Daichi. How convenient that he manage to slip away before the door got closed hmm but he wouldn’t intentionally prank you after ALL the lectures he gave you about not doing pranks this year right?

You didn’t notice how you started to cry and whimper wanting to leave.

On the outside, Daichi heard your cries and ordered Sugawara and Asahi to find the key to immediately get you out which it seems to take a while because Daichi has now stopped hearing your tears making him gulp in fear thinking something bad has happened to you in there.

Sugawara comes to you handing Daichi the keys, his handing shaking as he tries to unlock the door when he eventually does he finds you passed out on the ground of the dusty storage room. Very cliché I know ://

You wake up in the Nurses Office a bit confused on how you got there until your eyes land upon Daichi, remembering how you locked you in the Storage room where you had an asthma attack and passed out. You turned your body away from Daichi not wanting to talk to him right now after the hypocrisy he did.

“Y/N.. Are you alright?” He asked

“Do I look alright?” You responded in a bored tone

“I am really sorry Y/N... I know what I said to you about not doing pranks this year but Sugawara roped me into this and I didn’t want you to think I was too boring for you so I thought doing this prank would make you see me in a different light” he said

“yeah i saw you in a different light alright” you sassed, you then realised what he said ‘too boring’ kind of feeling less mad and more sad that he feels this way “Dai, you’d never be to boring for me … you’re one of the most funness is that a word? guys I've ever met.”

“really?” he asked  

“Of course! I’m kind of still mad at you for letting this happen but I do sort of understand why” you said giving him a hug.

You were eventually cleared to go home and as you left the clinic you saw Asahi and Sugawara standing at the door.  

“Y/N WE’RE SORRY” they bowed to you waiting on your responses

You chuckled slightly at their cuteness and ruffled both of their hair “all is forgiven, just make sure there’s ‘pranks’ this year “

Which they agreed upon.  

A/N: WOW I DID NOT like the way these turned out but its my first official thing that I wrote hopefully HOPEFULLY MY WORK IMPROVES (I THINK IT WILL) SO please join me on this ‘ride’ in improving my work. Feedback is VERY MUCH APPRECIATED and request too since I will literally write whatever...

I may do a part 2 … any particular characters people want?

[leonicscorpio]

Batboy Headcanons because I made this for me but you all can enjoy this too if want. (May contain mild NSFW)

Dick:

Has a weird relationship with unwanted gaze and the attention he receives because of his physique. He genuinely likes the attention but he draws the line when people start getting touchy. Just because he's shirtless working out doesn't mean he gave you consent to touch him.

Has good dieting skills but he's in his mid-late 20's and his metabolism has 0 signs of slowing down. He once ate a whole xl bag of M&M's in front of Steph and Babs and both said they wanted to murder him because he won't gain a pound.

Dick has ADHD and I'm sorry if you don't think otherwise. He has hyperactive type ADHD and while he's gotten better at controlling his symptoms he still stims stretching and flexing his arms and shaking his arms.

While not so much in Gotham, Dick is very politically active and volunteers at voter registration and working with organizations with the mission of police demilitarization in Blüdhaven.

Dick is a very sexually driven individual. However, I don't think it's entirely healthy. His ADHD also comes into play with this but Dick just needs to have a release at least twice a day or he'll feel physically sick.

I don't know if you all have seen male gymnasts. But Dick, like the rest of them, has FREAKSISHLY large biceps. Everyone talks about Dick has the best ass in the bat family and while Jason may be larger and stronger, Dick has the best physique.

Dick's apartment is littered with sticky notes in places such as the fridge/in front of his computer. If it's not written down and in a place where he can't ignore it, it's not going to get done.

I'm sorry I know everyone says his birthday is in March but I have to go to the older Nightwing comics and say his Birthday is December 1st. I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me this man doesn't give off Sagittarius energy. You can't. I respect you but you can't look at that and tell me that man isn't a Sagittarius or has super heavy Sag in his birth chart.

Dick's at home doing nothing but chilling? You best believe he's gonna be shirts off, tits out, and rocking some blue flannel PJ's.

Dick is currently the only member of the family asides from Barbara who is regularly attending therapy. And he actively encourages each of his brothers and sisters to go every time.

After his Agent 37 days. He sits down with Jason and talks about having to use a gun and how hard it was. And how having to kill people has affected him. When he had to kill the KGBeast (Agent 37 days he snapped his neck) I headcanon Dick just trauma v*mit*d. Jason hugged him and just consoled him.

It's canon that Dick has anger issues but to me, it's not explored or talked about enough and not a lot of people like to talk about it. Dick is very much the 'if I ignore it it'll go away' type when it comes to his anger and he can brush most insults or harassment off fine enough. But when he breaks, he makes Jason look like a saint. I'm talking slamming you into a wall and screaming in your face angry. He'll be profusely apologetic afterward but still.

Despite popular belief, I don't think he's that bad of a cook. He's just not very experimentative. He can follow a recipe and does look at some guides. But to me, Dick Grayson just is that guy who is like Chicken veggies and rice are a meal that I can cook 4-6 times a week.

Dick has a slight fear of dentists. He doesn't have bad teeth and has good dental health. He just doesn't like the idea of a drill going in his mouth and the few times Bruce has to take him to a dentist he had a panic attack every time.

Everyone lives for the fics where Jason beats the shit out of Tim and everyone is just like lol well Bruce and Dick just forgives him. No. When Dick found out it was Jason who beat Tim to the ground, Dick was literally seething and told Jason "Pick on someone your own size or else I'll make you wish you back in that f'ing coffin."

Dick's favorite foods (some based in Canon*): Milk Chocolate*, Cereal*, Asparagus, Bananas, Banana flavored candy, Hawaiian Pizza* (suffer its canon) Rum, thanksgiving Turkey.

Jason:

He may be the self-diagnosed black sheep (rightfully so) of the family, but Jason does genuinely love spending time with his siblings. Whether it be sharing memes with them on social media or just randomly showing up where they are and abducting them to go get ice cream/coffee/snacks.

He'd probably attempt to harm you if you told him this to his face. But he is the closest acting to Bruce out of all of the family. In terms of mannerisms and inherent warmth and kindness behind a dark façade.

Has two moods: either exceptionally, almost neat-freak levels of clean, or his life is completely falling apart and Jason can't tell you for sure what color his floors are because there's so much stuff scattered about.

Despite their initial hatred of each other, Jason truly feels closest to Tim and Tim is the only person asides from maybe Barbra who he can just talk to without feeling any judgment.

Jason only smokes when he's extremely nervous about an operation or a hit. For those who don't know criminal justice cigarettes are the fastest way to get genetic material on someone. That being said he does still like to smoke occasionally.

Me, plus a lot of people give him this sort of 'Lazarus Rage' as I like to call it. When he's in the heat of a mission or if he's getting upset/angry his vision will get blurred with green, and it feeds on his anger and just gets perpetually harder to contain until he releases it. Jason has gotten much better at controlling it. But as he will tell Tim or Babs, he's "seeing green" which means they need to be careful because Jason could kill.

Everyone says Dick is the mother hen. I see you, I accept you, but let me raise you. Jason came to realize that he died because of his rash decision to go after The Joker alone. If Jason finds any of his siblings out acting alone, or even at the very least without Oracle. Jason WILL forcefully interject himself and ask them what the fuck they think their doing.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. Trying to get close to Jason is hard. He will degrade you can attempt to try to get you to hate him before he lets you in (that cheeky Tsun of him)

He genuinely cares for and supports all of his siblings but has been rough on them needlessly. But if Bruce is being the distant or absent parent he is, you better believe if any of the siblings drops him a text or a call, Jason will be there in a heartbeat.

He's the most physically powerful of the whole Bat Family. You don't understand because of his time in the League, his time with the All-Caste, and having abused Venom for a time, he can snap an arm bone like it's a carrot with little effort.

Everyone in the family likes dogs and goes out of their way to gush over a dog, but Jason takes it to a whole new level. And even when he's masked up dogs just gravitate to Jason.

Can and has grown a beard in a matter of a few days. He usually likes to be clean shaven but some days he likes to wear a beard just to throw everyone off.

One time him, Steph, Tim, and Duke all went to a restaurant (Red Robin lol) and the waitress got his order wrong and his burger had raw tomatoes on it, Jason took the tomatoes off and ate it while looking absolutely miserable. Tim: Jay why did you eat that you didn't have to you know you could have asked the server to fix your burger. Jason, almost in tears: "She works really hard and she tried and I'm a scary dude I don't want to make her upset.." Duke: "... Jason you literally shot at a cop for looking at you funny the other day. But you're afraid of upsetting a waitress?!? I mean ACAB but dude.. "

Jason's happiest big brother moment™ was taking Tim and Damian to the shooting range and watching them both get their first bullseye.

You can't tell me Jason Todd was into the Emo/Screamo/Warped-Tour Scene. His favorite bands/Albums in no particular order, That's the Spirit (Literally the whole album is Jason Themed and I'm gonna die on this hill) & Sempiternal by Bring me the Horizon, Digital Renegade & Everyone's Safe in the Treehouse by I See Stars, The Resistance: Rise of the Runaways by Crown the Empire,

Jason Todd's favorite foods: (Also some based in Canon*) Burgers, Chili Dogs*, Lager-style beers, Freshly baked bread*, Neopolitan ice cream, grilled corn, and Chinese Chicken noodle soup with Duck.

Tim:

This boy *slaps car roof* gives off so much asexual energy. I know New 52 exists but I just feel like Tim is the person who really, REALLY has to trust you and like you before he's sexually active with you.

HYPERFIXATES. You also can't tell me Tim isn't on the spectrum/or has ADHD.

Is the only member of the family who regularly checks up on Jason and talks to him every day via text message. The two are memelords together and love to play pranks on the other members.

While Dick may give the most frequent hugs and Jason gives the tightest, most secure hugs, Tim's hugs are always the warmest and make you just feel good.

Tim's birthday is July 19th. Meaning he's a Cancer. Let that sink in.. no, really let that information just soak. (Note I have nothing against Cancer women, cancer men however....)

All of the bat boys really struggle with talking about their feelings. Dick will manipulate you into changing the subject via twisting it to be about you, Jason will just cut you off or will ignore you, Damian will deflect everything and harass you until you stop, Tim however, Tim is very emotional and while he's very calculated about who he's emotional with, he's not afraid to break down and cry if he trusts you.

Everyone who says he's the level headed Robin haha how's it feel to be WRONG. Tim is at best the least functional college student and at worst a lemming. 'No Tim, coffee isn't a meal I'm going to make you some food or I'm going to stick you in a room with Damian for an hour.' Richard (Dick) John Grayson.

People overblow how addicted to caffeine Tim is. But it's true. Just overblown. You can talk to him before he's had his caffeine just don't expect him to be anything but curt and blunt.

Everyone says Jason would be the worst at texting but it's Tim. He's the master of leaving you on read. While Jason may do it on purpose, Tim is just really bad at texting people and while he always will read your messages he forgets to respond unless it's really funny or really pressing.

Everyone sees Tim as this bean pole super skinny boy Robin. Tim may not be stacked like Dick or a freaking tank like Jason, but Tim is NOT super skinny. He's just as muscular and likes to work out as anyone, but he just is super lean, so he looks a lot bigger and his muscles are more defined because of how thin his skin is. He has those almost disgusting spider veins on his arm. Kind of gross to look at, but he's the dream of any nurse. This means Tim is also the king of accidentally sending/posting thirst traps.

He really is the glue of the Bat Family. Everyone kidnaps Tim for 'Tim Time'.

Dick likes to spar with and in general just hang out with Tim. Tim tried to teach Dick how to skateboard and you'd think the boy who mastered the trapeze would know how to skateboard but you'd be wrong.

Babs and Tim always hang out and talk about computer stuff and Babs knows she can vent to Tim about anything and he won't say a word.

Tim and Steph were a thing for a while and even though they're just friends now, they still are very close and the two have a very deep bond, liking to shop with each other and watch movies,

Cass just loves to be around Tim because of how calming he is but also she knows she can spar with him AND Cass can also skateboard with Tim too.

Even though him and Damian are always fighting, the two still end up being together and have this unspoken bond. They work great together on a team but other than that they still hate each other.

And while everyone still is hesitant around Jason, and despite the fact that Jason literally beat Tim to within an inch of his life, AND would still trigger Tim and taunt him about it. The two have this odd closeness that rivals even him and Steph. Tim will always be the first to bat for Jason. Jason was Tim's Robin. And despite the fact Jason literally beat it into Tim's head to "never meet your heroes." Tim will always be there for Jason should he ask. The two are just close. And it's hard to describe. Bruce has caught Tim and Jason just platonically sleeping next to each other or just doing their own things shoulder to shoulder silently, just enjoying each other's company.

Tim and Duke also have a really positive relationship with one another and the two can stay up all night just talking about anything. Their minds just mesh well together. The two also love to team up and prank the other members of the Batman Family.

Tim's favorite ASMR/Stim? Watching those Tik Toks of people cleaning computers or cleaning phones. The sound of an air duster is like music to his ears and if any of the Bats need their technology cleaned it secretly makes Tim so happy to help them.

Wear his hair up or wear his hair down? It depends! While Tim likes his long hair he also has gotten plenty of compliments for his short hair and likes to style it to suit any occasion.

My one pet-peeve with Tim is that he probably is that person who lets his privilege show from time to time. While he was essentially raised to just sit down, shut up, and be a perfect trophy son to the Drake's. The Drake's were in the same tax bracket as Bruce and Tim definitely was a rich kid. He never means to come across as spoiled, but sometimes Jason will give him harsh looks if Tim just throws away food he doesn't like or says things like Chipotle is 'poor people food'

Tim Drake's favorite foods (you know by now*) Donuts*, Shallot and Artichoke Pizza with Canadian Bacon* (odd choice but it could work) Artichokes in general are his favorite vegetable, Strawberries, and Beef Pho.

Damian:

I headcanon that he has the worst teeth of all of the Bat Boys and he actually has to use lingual braces. (Hence why you can't see his braces)

Canonically is a very good artist and while him and Tim don't get along, Tim introduced Damian to digital art and gave him a photoshop pack and a nice tablet for his birthday one year and Damian loved it so much.

Damian is a capricorn and I will die on this hill. A January capricorn too.

Now you want a good chef? You've got Damian. Having converted to veganism Damian has had to get creative whenever he goes out to eat so he tends to like to eat more home cooked foods. Damian loves all matters of mushrooms, eggplant, and bell peppers.

Damian really struggles the most with his wanting to just be a normal kid. Despite the fact he will dismiss you for it, anytime he gets to spend at Gotham Academy with Jon and the rest of the kids he's naturally the happiest.

Damian LOVES to give gifts. He loves the look on people's faces when they are shocked when they actually get something from Damian.

Despite the fact that he's been traumatized from both his times with Ra's and Talia as well as with Bruce. He just wants Bruce and Talia to be together because he loves them both equally.

While he's the least flexible and least gymnastic of the Robins do let your guard down around him. He is the fastest runner and the guy is rivaled only by Jason in terms of lethality.

So someone (Jason Todd & Duke Thomas) introduced Damian to trap music and ever since anytime his phone gets stolen people will be shocked to find he's listening to some combination of Lil' Yachty, X, Kendrick Lamar, Wiz, and Kodak.

If any random person tries to hug Damian he'll immediately push them away, he'll bitch and moan about just about anyone hugging him other than Bruce & Dick.

Damian loves to go to the beach/the ocean. He just thinks it's so vast and he loves the brineness of the air. Also being half white, quarter middle-eastern and quarter Chinese (Yes everyone forgets Talia is half Chinese) Damian gets DARK. And although he's just okay as a swimmer he still likes bogeyboarding and eventually wants to learn how to surf.

I'm genuinely afraid once Puberty is done with this kid and everyone in the family is. He has Bruce Wayne AND Talia Al-Ghouls genes and those are two SEXY human beings. Damian's gonna grow a beard one day and people aren't going to know how to act.

Damian secretly plays Fortnight and not even Jon knows. He doesn't want to get shamed. He'd rather lose a match and ruin his streaks than deal with the shame of anyone in that family finding out he plays Fortnight.

Damian Wayne's favorite foods (canon*) Cereal*, Avocados, Grilled Tempeh, his mom's Tabbouleh, Mushroom Tacos, and Vegan Sushi rolls, and grape juice.

Duke Thomas

Duke is like, freakishly good with a piano, and he picked it up naturally!

Also everyone says Tim brews the best pot of coffee in the Bat Family, cue to everyone's surprise when Tim was sick one day and couldn't make a pot. Only to find the coffee was freaking amazing. Duke didn't take any credit at first until Alfred let it slip that Duke was the one who brewed the pot.

Duke being the only Meta of the family originally thought he was the double-token because he was a Meta and a black boy. Needless to say his fears were seriously unfounded the moment he got to know everyone.

Although he somewhat fears Jason and his temper initially, he and Jason have one of the closest relationships in the family. If Tim isn't around to bat for Jason, Duke will happily take his spot. The two work on each other's bikes and grew to share the same taste in music.

Duke uses his Photokenetic powers as a force for good and for shenanigans. Jason wants to play a prank on Dick and Damian while Dick is reading Damian a story? Duke will hide Jason in the shadows and will cover up his shadow. Alfred dropped something in the dark? You better believe Duke will find it in 3 seconds or less.

Duke makes it a point to visit his parents every weekend to talk to them. Although they are making some progress in their recoveries, it's still slow going. Eventually, he starts bringing members of the family to see his parents. It started with Cass, then Jason, and the rest followed suit.

Duke loves playing video games with Damian and even helps Damian beat some tougher levels when Damian is about to rage and destroy the console.

Duke is into Magic the Gathering and you cannot tell me otherwise. Duke also is the DM for the Bat Kids annual D&D games. I can and will make a D&D Batfam Headcanons if asked.

Loves Pho just as much as Cass and Tim and they all call it a date night every now and then where they can go to a hole in the wall pho place. It's really a secret between the three of them.

DUKE THOMAS IS THE BEST SWIMMER OF THE BAT BOYS AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. HE JUST THRIVES IN THE WATER.

Finding out his birth father is a supervillain was really tough for him. He went into a shell for a little bit afterwards. Cass and Steph were there to help talk him out of his funk.

Duke Thomas's favorite foods (lol what canon DC hasn't acknowleged our boy in a while..) Chicken Pho, Thai Iced Tea, Papaya, Crab Cakes, Italian Hoagies, his mom's Lemon Poundcake, mint chocolate chip ice cream.

I hope y'all enjoyed! Up next (eventually) will be the Bat Girls!

[icehot13]

Hi! I just love your Boba x Din fics (they're more Canon to me then the actual series it's crazy!) But now I want to write one myself. However I fear its just gonna be too similar to yours cause I am so in love (!) with the way you write them both! Not sure where I am going with this :,) but maybe you have any sort of advice for me? If not, just take this with you: You're an awesome writer and absolutely defined Din and Boba and their relationship for me! Thank you! <3

hi!! this is so wonderful, and i hope i do have some useful advice about it! i have a lot of feelings about fic-writing in general (i've been at it for fifteen years now!!)

You should absolutely write it! We may start with the same characterization, but no one can write it exactly the way you envision it. (If it's inspired by very specific elements or in the same verse, most people will link to the original inspiring fic, which i think is lovely) Here's how I would go about writing an inspired-by fic!

First - what do you like about the fic: for you, it sounds like the characterization! Is it how soft Din is towards Boba, is it Boba's disconnect from the mandalorians, etc etc etc. the more specific you can be, the more details you can free yourself up from and change to your liking! sometimes it's easier to break it down into many pieces so you can take fewer, and leave yourself more room to build on your own. so it's no longer 'this exact characterization of boba' but 'boba, who has panic attacks after the sarlacc and doesn't identify as a mandalorian - and now featuring wariness towards Din, a desire to be a mandalorian, a history where he once tried' etc etc etc.

Second - what's the opening where you see your fic: this is the point where you see a fic, in the spot that's open to a divergence from the original plot. like if you read The Way Home and said 'ok but what if boba hated Din for rescuing him.' it can be a tiny divergence - 'what if this scene went on for a little longer' - or very big - 'what if the vibe of this scene happened within an entirely different plot'. this is sort of how you figure out what you want to do with the characterization you like, and how to make it your own.

Third - what makes a fic feel like yours? it's useful to see what in your own style serves this characterization, and will help it feel more like your own. for me, this would be like... religious metaphors, or greek myth references, or being heavy on dialogue. in another fandom i'm in, there's this scene in an episode that EVERYONE wants to write fic about, but every fic feels different! One ended quite sadly, one had very explosive reactions between characters, one made it a poly relationship, one backed up to childhood, one was exceptionally accurate with the London descriptions, etc etc etc. mine made it an icarus reference. every fic felt different because of this even though they were all based on the exact same scene

I hope that helps you get started! I think it's amazing you want to write them with this dynamic, and i would love to see it when you post it!! <3

[stampstamp]

IKEA wasn't too stressful. Not many people wore masks but we went at 10AM so it was fairly quiet. I got some canisters and tried chickless strips (plant based fried chicken strips). They were so good! Another example of how the seasoning on fried/breaded fake chicken is way better.

I finally went to Cribbs Causeway for the first time post-pandemic! I had bubble tea and went in all the shops I've missed. I bought loads of things in Tiger. We went to Costco afterwards which I always find a little bit boring but I got a value pack of my favourite protein bars and a cute desk organiser.

After that we walked along Severn Beach because we hadn't seen the sea for years. I had fun overall and I'm glad I didn't have a panic attack but I'm still anxious that we caught the virus because we were one of the few groups wearing masks. I've been unwell lately so I wanted the day off as a sort of sick day but I ended up wearing myself out more 🥲