#i'll keep messaging open in case anyone needs something

[noiriarti]

Just Practice: Anakin Skywalker x Reader (Modern Best Friends AU) Ch. 4

NSFW!!!!!!! Literally so NSFW!!! MDNI! Summary: Anakin is your best friend, the one person you can't survive without, and you're about to go to different colleges. You bring up your worries about your inexperience and he offers to help. Pairing: Anakin Skywalker x AFAB!Reader Word Count: 3.5k CW: usage of 'good girl,' degradation (usage of 'slut'), rough sex, lots of masturbation, p in v sex, overstimulation AN: OMG it's done!! The last chapter of the best friends AU! I'm considering adding a bonus chapter of the reader trying anal with Anakin for the first time, so let me know if you'd like to see that! As always, requests and asks are open!

Ch. 1, Ch. 2, Ch. 3, [Ch. 4], Bonus Chapter

Chapter 4: Olives and Mushrooms

You gripped the note in your hands, almost crumpling the worn paper, and you could hardly believe what you were reading. 

Since we were kids, I've considered you my closest friend. Someone who made me me. I started listening to Fall Out Boy because you did, I peel bananas upside down because you showed me how, and I only eat pepperoni pizza with olives and mushrooms because you've ordered it so much that it grew on me. I treasure you your friendship so much, and those feelings have been changing since we were younger to something more romantic. I don't know when it started, but when we kissed, I knew I loved you too much to not tell you. I've been finding myself wanting to hold your hand or kiss you all the time. You make my life so much better, and I want to spend all my time with you. Not telling you that has been torture, because you've been on my mind every minute of every day. Ben has been telling me that I stare too much at my phone, and it's only because I'm looking at texts from you or thinking about what I want to say to you. Being with you is all I've been looking forward to since we separated.

The truth is that I'm terrified to say this, so I needed to write it down. I'm scared you'll feel too weird about this, which I would understand, but I'm also scared that we just won't work out if we try. That's why I'm happy that the most understanding person in my life is the one I'm telling this to. If anyone could make it work, it would be us. I don't want to make you uncomfortable, so I want you to know that I'll respect whatever you say. If you're interested, I would love to go on a date and see where this goes. Will you go out with me?

Your breath caught in disbelief. This couldn't be happening. There was no way this was real. That Ani, your Ani, loved you back, was absurd. You'd sooner believe that he was playing an elaborate prank on you, but the writing was so sincere, so sappy, it could only have been written by your Ani. You looked up at him on the bed, scrolling on his phone and tucked into the covers, the boy you knew and loved. His smile when he saw something funny, and his quick fingers as he texted someone, probably his mom, back. The face you had dinner with frequently. The one person whom you wanted more than anything to love you the way you loved him was the person who wrote this letter to you, so sweet and sincere.

But why was it crumpled up like that? Discarded? Did you mean that little to him? Was it just something he was going to say if he needed to? To get into your pants? You imagined him writing the words out and keeping it in his bag in case you hesitated. He, of all people, would know that telling you he loved you would get you to do anything for him. The thought sent a cold stab into your heart. It couldn't be. Ani was so loyal. He'd never do that. Never. But you also would have said the same thing about him kissing you three weeks ago. And the way he treated Padme at the end of their relationship, so detached, so uninterested in her messages... Maybe you didn't know this side of him that well at all. You had to give him a chance to explain. To tell you that you were just being paranoid. Your throat felt tight as you tried to say something, but your voice came out laced with your doubt and fear.

"Anakin, what the fuck is this?" He shot up from where he was sitting on the bed, suddenly jumping and rushing over to you to snatch the paper from your hands. When he reached you, he was desperate and panicking, the fear rolling off him so strongly that you could practically feel it.

"FUCK, fuck, don't read that. Don't. Please," he begged you as he ripped the paper away and crumpled it in his hand. His eyes were wild, defensive, and you didn't understand why. If he had really meant to tell you, why would he freak out now? Unless he never meant to say anything unless he needed to.

"Were you ever planning on telling me?" The words came out gritted, sharp like a knife piercing through his skin. He visibly flinched, and you realized you had probably hit the nail on the head.

"It doesn't matter," he muttered as he looked away. The lines of his jaw were set, and you saw a muscle flare as he clenched it. Even now, you wanted him desperately. You barked out an angry laugh.

"Oh, it doesn't matter, does it? You loving me doesn't matter?" The words came out sharp, angry, scalding, like a brand on his skin. He recoiled as if struck, immediately getting defensive. His handsome features twisted, then unclenched.

"It's not like that, I-you-" he stumbled over his words as he put his hands in his air, getting frustrated with himself. He threw his arms down by his sides, then pointed a finger toward you accusingly. "Well, were you ever planning on telling me about Jake?" 

"Jake? What the fuck does Jake have to do with this?" You balked and scoffed. Both of you were raising your voices at this point, and neither of you would deescalate any time soon.

"Well your roommate obviously thinks he has something to do with it," Anakin gritted out bitterly. The temperature was rising in the room, tension growing between the two of you.

"Anakin, stop being jealous over a guy I've spoken to literally twice! I don't love him, I love--" But then you stopped yourself. He was driving you crazy, and you almost blurted out something that you shouldn't have. "Whatever."   "No, finish your sentence. Finish it. Now." He was furious, almost looming over you with his broad frame. His rust-colored hair flew in his eyes as he yelled out the words, casting shadows in his face. You knew what he wanted and the words flew out of your mouth without any defiance.

"I love you! Obviously, dumbass! Why didn't you tell me sooner?" His face fell at your admission, but then he snapped back at you.

"Cause I thought you were dating some fuck named Jake! And that you didn't want to be more than friends! You literally said we could never date to Ahsoka, like, three hours ago, remember?" His voice was hoarse from yelling. A flare of pleasure curled in your stomach at the thought that he was jealous of some random guy just because he paid attention to you, but you had to make the point that of course you couldn't say you liked Anakin to Ahsoka while he was right there. How stupid was he?

"I just said that because I thought you didn't like me like that!" You yelled back.

"Well, I do!"

"Okay!"

"Okay!" The two of you sat silent, fuming at one another. Anakin was still panting from yelling and looked so incredibly fuckable while shirtless that you almost kissed him right then and there. Then, sometime when the beating of your heart dropped to normal levels and you stopped, the realization hit that oh, Anakin was in love with you. You'd just been fighting about it, but you didn't really comprehend what that meant in your clouded anger. It meant that every time he called you baby in bed, he meant it. It meant that he didn't just want to practice. It meant that you two could be together, finally more than friends. The warmth you had felt before was growing, filling every part of your soul and bursting through the uncertainty you had about him. Anakin loved you. And this was probably the best day of your life.

"Anakin, say it, please," you begged. You wanted to hear him say it, not in anger or frustration, or in some hidden note, but out loud. To make it real. He had softened since your fight, and approached you with that same gentleness you loved. His strong, warm arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his embrace again and leaning his forehead against yours.

"I love you," he whispered tenderly. His blue eyes shone with affection, just like they had for years. It was perfect, so sweet and honest, just like your Ani. The silence sat between you for several long seconds, each moment intensifying the stares you were giving one another. You weren't sure which one of you moved first. Your mouths crashed together with enough force to pull a groan out of you as he kissed you fiercely. Your nails dragged down the warm skin of his bare back while his hands found your hair. Still kissing you frantically, Anakin pushed you against the wall by the bathroom and pressed your bodies against the cool drywall. A moan ripped out of his mouth against yours as you bit his lip brutally, pouring all your anger and desire and love into your movements. You kept teasing him with your tongue, swiping it across his lips or touching it to his, and he had enough.

"Get on the bed before I make you," he growled. 

You were still wearing the lace bra under your sleep shirt, so you threw the old tee off on the way to the bed, leaving you in just your bra and shorts, with nothing beneath them. When you saw he was close, you grabbed his shoulder and pulled him down onto you, settling himself between your legs. Soon, you felt the hardness you knew well grow and rut against you. Anakin's mouth on yours was demanding and muffled your moans as you thrust your hips up to meet his. He broke off from you to trail sloppy kisses down your jaw to your throat, which finally led to him sucking a mark into the crook of your neck. His teeth scraped against the sensitive skin and you gasped. He obviously enjoyed the sound and smiled against you. You got the sense that he was devoted to making you feel pleasure, lapping up every sound and word as his reward. All he wanted was for you to feel as good as he did, latched onto your neck.

When he pulled away, his face shone with pride at the dark mark he had left on you. He loved making you his. He immediately went further down to your bra, kissing over the top of your breasts and occasionally teasing you with his tongue. You sat up for a moment, during which you could see the visible panic in his eyes that he had done something wrong. You unclipped the bra from the back, letting it fall. He grinned widely at you, like it was his first time seeing a girl naked. Well, half-naked, you thought.

Anakin immediately resumed kissing down your collarbone, finally getting where he wanted. When his lips connected with your nipple and you felt his tongue dart out, you moaned obscenities into the quiet room. There was no one but the two of you in the world. Emboldened, his teeth scraped your nipple while his free hand went to pinch the other, hard, shooting pain and pleasure into your core. He alternated between the sting of his pinches and his soothing tongue as you keened out his name over and over. You would never get tired of saying it. By the time he had left marks all over your chest, you were sure the neighbors would report you to the building manager. 

"I love you," you whispered when he gazed up at you with his eyes.

"Don't tell me that now," he grunted against your nipple. A breathy laugh escaped your chest.

"What? Why?"

“Makes me want to wreck you.” The way he bit it out, with so much mischief in his voice, made you want to see him try.

"Then do it," you teased back. God, you loved that smile. You slipped your thumbs beneath the waistband of your shorts and pulled them off. Having someone see you completely naked for the first time was terrifying, but Anakin looked so hungry and reverent that it soothed the fear. He kissed his way down your stomach to your pussy, only stopping to groan when you wove your hands through his soft hair and pulled.

His lips finally met your desperate clit, still sensitive and swollen from your orgasms earlier. You moaned his name loudly, in almost a yelp, and he kept moving his warm, wet tongue faster, faster against you. Everything slid together so perfectly, moistened both by his spit and your wetness, that you were finding yourself get close faster than you would have expected. You tilted your hips up to him, spreading your legs even further. A finger poked at your pussy, and you jumped a bit in surprise before you felt it slide in with ease. You weren't just wet, you were practically soaked. His spit coated your inner thighs and probably the lower half of his face, but he was unrelenting. It started from your toes and cracked like a whip through your body. Your mouth gaped open in a silent scream as you came on his face and clenched your legs around his head.

While you came, he focused on fingering you and found that place that made you let out a whine while he pressed it during a particularly strong aftershock. You were panting and sweating like you had just played one of Anakin's games for him. On top of that, you were sure your hair looked messy and foul and distinctly unsexy, but he pulled himself off you and told you otherwise. 

"You look beautiful, darling," he said in pure worship as he caught his breath. His chin was covered in a thin sheen of spit and your juices, which made your pussy constrict on his finger again.

"Think you can manage one more for me, baby?" You nodded. Yes, you would do anything for him. You would walk over glass to please him right now. He dove back in, tongue consistently stroking your oversensitive clit in just the right way. You squirmed under his head, pulling your arms off his hair in your movements. Shit. This wasn't going to be an easy orgasm. He used his hands to grab your wrists and hold them down as you shook and moved under him. It was clear you weren't going anywhere. Everything hurt in a delightful way, especially your clit, which was begging you to pause. This time, it was softer, more effort for you. You clenched your stomach and bore down on his fingers, desperately wanting to cum. 

The sweat dripped down your forehead, and you felt it coming. It washed over you in warm waves, a weaker echo of the previous ones that day, but much more draining. Your head was soft and fuzzy, all about Anakin. He was all there was to you, right now, in the euphoria. His strong arms, lifting you up, kissing your cheek, telling you how good you were, that you were his good girl. When you felt more present, there was one thing you desperately wanted. To be filled. Your pussy had felt his fingers and wanted, needed, more.

Anakin had positioned himself above you, keeping his hips distinctly far from you to give you a bit to recover, but busied himself by kissing your face and whispering sweet words in your ear.

"Hang on, baby," he said as you started pawing down his chest to pull down his pants and grab his cock, trying to get him to line up and slam into you. He slid out of the flannel, then pulled out a condom from the pocket, and rolled it on.

"But Ani," you whined, thrusting up into his thigh. You needed him.

"I know, baby. I know. I'll take care of you as soon as I know you want this," he said. You nodded, swallowing down a pinch of anticipation.

In his eyes, you saw him, all of him. The shouted insults when you beat him at Mario Kart, the sweet kisses. His nose going red and runny from the cold in your snow fort. The sardonic eye roll he gave when he was furious at you, the way only you could make him, and the grin he gave when he got a good grade. His voice when he whispered to you that he loved you. He was made up of these tiny little things, little bits of starlight and darkness, all shoved and compressed to make one man. Your Anakin.

"Ani, I love you. So much. And now that I know you love me, there's nothing more that I want than to do everything with you. So stop worrying, and just fuck me already." His smile was everything.

Anakin pushed into you slowly, letting out a soft grunt when he first felt your heat around him, and it was obvious he was holding himself back for your sake. He was so big, so thick, that when you thought there couldn't possibly be any left, he just kept getting deeper. He bottomed out inside you and paused, but you jerked your hips up, wanting him to move, fast, slow, anything. Anakin took the hint.

His thrusting was fast, precise, just like him. You swore you could feel the ridge of his cock as he moved within you, but your pleasure-induced babbling drowned out everything else.

"Fuck, Ani, shit that's so good, fuck me fuck me fuckmefuckme fuck your little slut!" You realized what you said with a little gasp. It wasn't intentional, but fuck it felt good to say. Anakin was clearly surprised, but quickly cast you a hungry grin. He loved it. 

"So you want to be fucked like a slut, huh? Turn around. Now," he growled as he pulled out of you, grabbed your hips, and whipped you around. You barely landed on your hands and knees when he slammed into you again, and you let out a keen. Anakin smacked your ass before setting a consistent, punishing pace, letting small grunts and groans drop from his lips as he got closer. With the angle of your hips, he was hitting the same, deep spot within you over and over, and you practically couldn't close your mouth.

"Fuck yes, fuck me like a slut, fuck me, yesyesyesyes," you chanted as he grabbed your hair and pulled. The feeling was just like earlier that night, when he fucked your throat, but he was harsher. Your scalp stung so perfectly, adding to the overwhelming array of feelings. Even though you wanted to, your pussy couldn't squeeze out another orgasm. It was just too much. Anakin was feeling it too, and his sounds got more frantic along with his hips. In a few seconds, he leant over you, teasing your ear with his pants.

“I don’t-- I don’t think I can last any longer, fuck, baby, your pussy is too good,” he breathed. He sped up, snapping his hips into yours erratically as he moaned your name and came. His jaw flexed, his brow furrowed, and his eyes clenched through it. When he was done, he pulled out of you slowly, tied off the condom, and tossed it in the trash by your bed before returning to give you some love. He drew you to his chest, scratching your scalp and kissing your forehead, until you both were almost asleep. Anakin prodded you into using the bathroom and brushing your teeth before you passed out.

This time, when you came back from the bathroom, there were no more discoveries, just Anakin in your bed, exactly where he belonged. He pulled you in with his strong arm, pressing his chest to your back as you both drifted off.

When you woke up, you thanked your lucky stars Ahsoka hadn't come home yet, because you were butt-naked and sprawled on top of Anakin. It took a moment to register that Anakin, your best friend, was in your bed, and then another to realize that, oh yeah. He was your boyfriend now. For the rest of the weekend he acted just like you thought he would, getting you dinner and holding your hand. You also bickered and told each other all the stories you had missed. You had become romantic partners, but you were still best friends at your core. Not that much had changed, really.

When he left, the loneliness and homesickness of being at college was lighter. You knew, standing by the train platform and waving at him through the window, that he would be back. Over and over again you would come back to one another, until you could finally be together again. As you braved the crowds of Grand Central, trying to find your way to the goddamned subway, your phone pinged. 

Anakin: Coach just told me I'm playing Princeton next weekend Anakin: Well I'm really bench warming Anakin: You should come visit Anakin: Cheer me on Anakin: Only 1 hr by train

You: I'll get tix

Anakin: See you there baby

You smiled to yourself and walked back to your dorm.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Tag List (let me know if you'd like to be tagged in future works!): @doblasftcisco @aliciaasky @cultofsin @avalovesjoe1 @akixxrafiiy @princearthur4 @sythethecarrot @jackie-on-the-loose @throughparisallthroughrome @rhiannonhippiegirl

[slayfics]

Explosive tendencies a slow burn fan fiction about the readers developing relationship with Katsuki Bakugo.

Chapter fourteen: You visit Katsuki.

Chapter links

You puttered around your room trying to keep yourself busy. It was taking everything in you not to text and bug Katsuki. It should have been enough for you to know he was safe at home, but you still worried about how he was doing. Surely everything that happened was pretty traumatic for him. Being kidnapped by the League of Villains, and being in the middle of that fight with All Might and One For All.

You mindlessly folded some laundry and put it away as you desperately fought the urge to check on him. You knew he had to be tired from all the questioning from the police and no doubt his parents, so you tried to give him space.

You finished putting away the last of your laundry and eyed your phone on your bed. Ugh- fuck it. He can ignore it if he doesn't want to talk to anyone.

You grabbed your phone and messaged Katsuki.

How are you doing? I'm fine. You don't need to check on me. I know, but it's hard not to worry with everything that happened. I said I'm fine. I'm fucking tired of talking about it. The cops were here for hours. I'm sorry that sounds shitty. Want to come over? I promise I won't ask about it. We can talk about other stuff and pretend it didn't happen for a while. Can't. I'm on some house arrest shit. They don't want me going anywhere. I'll come to you then.

You really want to see me that bad hu?

You blushed reading his last text and before you could think of what to say back Katsuki was calling you.

"Hey," You answered your phone.

"I'm going to give you directions on how to get to my place," he said

"You could just send me your address," you said as you snuck out your window.

"I want you to stay on the phone with me the whole time. In case something happens. I don't need you running into villains or anything on the way to my place. I'd never hear the end of it from the damn police," he grumbled.

You laughed at his remarks. While his words were harsh you knew by now it was just the way Katsuki was. It was actually sweet that he wanted to make sure you were safe the whole way to his house.

"Alright tell me what street you are on," he said.

You gave him the name of passing streets and he proceeded to give you what he decided to be the safest route even though it was a little longer.

"I don't want you walking down any alleyways or shit like that. And hurry up you're walking so damn slow," he said.

"I am not! It's not my fault I don't have a quirk that lets me explode through the sky," You teased him.

"Tch whatever- do you see the house with the brown wall yet?" he asked.

Your mouth hung slightly open as you realized the house Katsuki was talking about. It was a rather huge house, that you hadn't expected him to live at.

"Holy shit-" you said being unable to keep your thoughts to yourself.

"What?" He asked.

"This is a huge fucking house Bakugo, do you have a lot of siblings or something?"

"No. It's just me and my parents. Come to the balcony on the second floor," He demanded.

You looked up and noticed Katsuki coming out onto the balcony. He used his quirk to jump down next to you.

"Just grab on to me," he said holding his arm out.

"What?" You blushed taken back.

"Don't be so weird about it, I'm just going to get us back up," he said as he wrapped his arm around you and set his quirk off again landing you both on the balcony.

"Come on get inside," he said walking into his room and waving for you to follow him.

You looked around his room and noticed he was extremely organized. Probably the cleanest boy's room you had ever seen. It was huge too, double the size of your room, including its own restroom. A few posters decorated the walls and a drum set sat in the corner.

Katsuki sat at his chair by his desk, "Just sit wherever I don't care," He replied when you both heard yelling from downstairs.

"KATSUKI WAS THAT YOUR QUIRK I HEARD!? YOU BETTER NOT BE CAUSING MORE PROBLEMS! EVERYONE'S ALREADY DONE ENOUGH FOR YOU!" A female voice yelled from downstairs.

Katsuki quickly yelled back causing your eyes to widen, "SHUT THE HELL UP I WAS JUST KILLING A DAMN SPIDER HAG!"

"DON'T YOU FUCKING TALK TO ME THAT WAY I'LL COME UP THERE AND BEAT YOUR ASS!" She yelled back.

Katsuki grunted but didn't respond.

"Um- was that your mom?" You asked.

"Yeah, fucking bitch has been driving me crazy under this damn house arrest," he replied.

You stared at Katsuki dumbfounded. By no means did you have the best family relationships, but you'd never expected his home life to be this way. Suddenly, a lot of Katsuki's personality started to make sense to you and for the first time, you almost pitied him.

"Must be rough not being able to get some space," you said sympathetically.

"Hey, you said you weren't going to talk about it!" He barked angrily.

"Right," You looked around the room feeling unsure of where to sit, until you reluctantly decided to sit on the edge of the bed facing him sitting in his chair.

You let out a sigh, having no idea what to say to him now that you were here.

"She's um- not actually going to come up here, right? She sounds like she'd kick my ass if she found me in here," You joked trying to lighten the mood.

"Tch. Nah, she won't. She wants just as much space from me as I do from her," he grumbled, which only made you feel sadder for Katsuki. "How did you idiots find out where to go that night anyway?" He asked.

"I thought you said you didn't want to talk about it?" You teased him.

"This is different! I'm the one asking the questions now," he replied.

"Fair enough. Well, Yayarozu had put a tracker on one of the Nomu's back at the training camp. She gave one to the police and pros and then made another one for us to follow later. Once we got there Kirishima used some night vision goggles, he bought to look in the building. That's when we saw all the Nomu's and then pros started showing up. Shortly after it sounded like you just teleported there with the other villains," you explained.

"Yeah, it was some teleporting quirk that one villain had. Smelled like shit it was awful," he replied. "And then what?" he asked, encouraging you to keep going.

"We heard you and knew we had to do something. Midoriya came up with the plan for him, Iida, and Kirishima to rocket through the sky to give you an opening."

Katsuki grumbled, "Of course, it was that fucking nerd's idea."

You figured he wasn't going to be happy to hear it was Izuku who had come up with the plan, but you didn't intend to lie to him. "Then when they got you, me, Todoroki, and Yayarozu took off. After that, we met up with the rest of you and you know what happened from there," You finished.

"Yeah- you hugged the shit out of me like I was some weakling you expected to find dead or something," he spoke harshly.

You felt stunned by his words and snapped back, "Hey I was just worried about you! And it was nice to see you weren't hurt at all."

Katsuki rolled his eyes and you both sat in silence for a moment before he asked you another question.

"What kind of goggles did shitty hair have? Did he already have them or just bought them?" He asked.

"I'm not telling you," you said stubbornly still upset at his last comment.

"The fuck? Don't be a brat!" he barked.

"Then apologize! You know I don't think you're weak!" You yelled back.

"I'm not fucking apologizing," he said sternly.

"You're so irritating do you know that! You would think you'd have an ounce of gratefulness for your friends and me! We were risking a lot going to find you! You know that right!?"

"Of course, I know that dumb ass! I'm not a fucking idiot!" He yelled back.

"Then stop acting like one!"

Katsuki stared at you with a bewildered expression, he had no idea what to make of your sudden feistiness. "Ugh," he groaned running his hand over his face.

"Fine- look I don't give a crap about you hugging me or whatever. So, just fucking tell me if Kirishima bought those goggles specifically to come look for me," he pleaded.

You stared at him deciding if you wanted to answer. You figured that was the best type of apology you'd get out of him and gave in, "He said he bought them specially to look for you. Happy?"

"No, I'm not fucking happy, I don't want to owe anyone anything. I didn't ask you extras to come look for me," He grumbled.

"If it was any of us, what would you have done?" You asked angrily, fed up with his attitude.

Katsuki gave you an intimidating stare as he thought your question over. After some time passed, he answered honestly, "Depends who."

"Kirishima. If it was Kirishima that got taken, what would you have done?"

Katsuki sighed, "I'd go get the dumb ass, but I wouldn't have been as reckless about it as you idiots were!" He exclaimed and crossed his arms.

You rolled your eyes at him and stared at the floor as a long pause sat between you both and your next question, "What if it was me?" You asked gently.

Katsuki ignored your question and stared out the window for entirely too long before saying, "It's getting late you should head back. I don't want you walking back in the dark," he said.

You got up without saying anything and stomped over to the balcony, frustrated still by Katsuki's never-ending stubbornness and refusal to answer you.

"Come here, I'll help you down," he said, pulling you to him as he shot off his quirk again landing you both on the ground.

"Same fucking deal alright, call me while you walk back," he said letting you go.

"Fine," you said irritated, and pulled out your phone. "But I'm not some fucking weakling either you know," you snapped at him.

"Yeah, I know," he said, voice softer than before. "Look," he paused and seemed to gather his thoughts for a moment. "Don't think I don't understand what you all did. I get it, I just- I don't know." He grunted and you could see him becoming frustrated with himself.

You sighed feeling guilty for your attitude now. Obviously, Katsuki had been through a lot the past two days. It was asking a lot of him to be happy or grateful about anything right now.

"It's fine, Bakugo... I'm just glad you are ok." You spoke and made a quick decision to test your luck once more as you wrapped your arms around him and brought him into an embrace. To your surprise, he didn't push you off or make some snarky comment. Instead, he gingerly wrapped his arms around you returning the gesture.

You rested your head on his chest embracing the hug for as long as you could. You realized you'd never met anyone as hard to read as Katsuki. One moment she seemed irritated by your very presence and now you felt him giving in embracing you tighter. Your whole body froze as he moved to gently rest his head on top of yours.

You felt paralyzed as if any slight movement would have scared him away like a skittish cat. Although, a part of you wondered what would have happened if you were to have looked up at him. However, the moment passed, and Katsuki broke the peaceful silence.

"Told you, you don't need to worry about me dumb ass. Now get going it's getting dark. And don't forget to call me on your way back." He said, removing his arms from you and breaking the embrace.

Tags: @anon-mouse223 @unofficialmuilover @maddietries @sikuthealien @queenpiranhadon @melrs21 @poemzcheng @kazuumii @bakunianadecorazon @ur-crusty-uncle

[bangtanficsforyou]

They Reject You (maknae line)- part two

Pairing: Bts maknae line x Reader

Word Count: 8.8K

Warnings: swear words here and there

A/N: here's my patreon just in case you enjoy reading my stuff!

Park Jimin

Jimin's eyes light up when he spots you in the cafeteria. You're sitting alone with a cup of coffee and typing away something on your laptop and he can't help but feel like the chair next to you is practically calling for him. 

He makes a quick beeline towards your table and occupies the seat. "Hey, sweetheart."

You don't bother looking up at him as your eyes remain fixed on the screen.

"You shouldn't be sitting alone, if you needed company you could have just texted me," he suggests taking hold of your coffee cup. His plump lips wrap around the straw and he draws up the liquid extra loudly, knowing very well that the noise annoys you.

However, you pay no attention to his lack of table manners.

"Do you know we were supposed to have an exam today but it got cancelled?" He speaks in a tone of disappointment, knowing you'd agree with him. It's one of your icks when you've worked hard for something and have shown up for it, but ultimately do not get the chance to prove yourself.

But you still remain focused on your work and give no reaction or response.

At this point, Jimin finds himself feeling curious as to what might be so important in your laptop that it has all your attention. He leans forward to take a peek and realises that you're working on an assignment.

"Assignments are now more important than me, I see," sighing dramatically he looks down as if upset by your lack of acknowledgement. Not even a moment later he looks up subtly to check if you're looking at him.

When he realises that you aren't, the slightest bit of annoyance sparks inside him.

"If you're not going to talk to me, I should just leave," he keeps his tone casual, not intending to let the fact that he's feeling grumpy, be known.

You tilt your head cutely and mumble something along the lines of vertices having a degree two to yourself. 

Jimin's jaw drops in complete shock. The last time you two had a proper chat was three days back and now that he's trying to talk to you, this is how you treat him?! If that's what you want, fine. He isn't going to sit here and beg you to pay attention to him.

"Fine, I'll leave. I have better stuff to do anyway," he grumbles and takes his leave.

If anyone were to take notice of Jimin's expressions, they'd probably end up laughing. He looks angry but that little pout on his lips and the sad look in his eyes makes him look like a little child throwing tantrums. 

It's a good thing your eyes are not on him. Not even when he makes his leave.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Two classes later, Jimin is scrolling through his Instagram when he comes across a reel of a cute puppy doing the usual puppy antics. His first instinct is to send it to you. However, when he clicks on the share button, he doesn't find your account on the list of people to send. His brows furrow in confusion and he types your account id on the search bar only for the screen to read a message saying no matches found. 

Have you....have you blocked him?

He exits the application and opens WhatsApp. When his eyes land on your contact he notices how your profile picture is appearing to be blank and it only makes him desperately type out a message to you. 

Throughout the class, he keeps hoping that he'd notice a double tick to assure him that you haven't blocked him but unfortunately, no such thing occurs.

At the end of the day, he goes to sleep with a displeased frown. How could you do this? How could you just ignore him during recess and then block him on social media out of nowhere? He didn't even do anything wrong. 

Did he?

He tries to recall the last time the both of you had a proper conversation and his mind goes to the events that occurred on the night of the frat party. 

It's true that you had snapped at him and that the conversation you had, would not fall under the category of 'friendly'. But he didn't think it was serious, either. Both of you had silly arguments here and there, but it never seemed to matter in the long run. Somehow or the other, Jimin always managed to get under your skin and get a reaction out of you. Sooner or later, the two of you would fall back to the rhythm of him annoying the shit out of you and you talking back to him. 

The more Jimin recalls the little fiery banters you two have engaged in, in the past, the more his confidence grows. He tells himself this time would be no different. It may take a little more time but Jimin is sure you'll be talking to him again. 

It's true that you have never blocked him before. Or never have downright ignored him like this. Even when you would appear to be mad, there was always that little twitch of your eyes or you poking the inside of your cheeks with your tongue, which let him know that he was being successful.

But it doesn't matter. 

Maybe you're really really mad at him this time. But he's sure he will melt that anger away with his smile and charm.

It works on everyone, no doubt it will work on you as well.

----------------------------------------------------------------

With a wide confident smirk plastered on his face, he walks into your classroom and looks for you. 

His smirk softens into a small smile when he spots you with your head buried in books. 

He ignores the hushed whispers and the dreamy stares and walks to your seat before sliding next to you. 

"Hey sweetheart," he says, putting the effort to make his voice extra sultry and smooth. That always works on the girls. 

And for a moment, Jimin thinks he has won when he notices the look of complete surprise on your face. However, his victory is short-lived as your surprise fades quickly and once it does you're back to your work without paying him any mind.

"I got you a gift," he places the said gift on top of your notebook. A rose. "I looked at it and it reminded me of you."

Your hands falter for a brief moment as the nib of your pen is met by the flower. You use your other hand to move the flower out of your way.

Jimin huffs. He is starting to get annoyed and there's this sense of unsettlement in his veins but he tries to look amused. If there's one thing that bothered you to no end, it was when he found your anger as a source of his amusement. 

"Awww," he coos with an underlying tone of mockery. "Are you angry at me?" 

You don't react. Jimin is neither surprised nor flattered. 

"It's so cute though," he comments, and only if you were looking at him would you have known it's only his voice that gives the faux impression of him being amused. His eyes, his frown even the curve of his lips don't hide the fact that he is anything but not amused. 

Jimin feels a mix of frustration and desperation, which makes him snatch the pen away from your hand.

You seem startled by his actions but instead of arguing with him for being such a pain in the ass, your hand makes its way to your pencil pouch. However, before you can take another pen out, Jimin is taking that away from you as well. 

"You aren't getting these back until you talk to me," he declares, as he hugs the pouch and your pen close to his chest as if shielding them away from you.

You sigh, not out of agitation or anger. You seem bored. Something that scares and hurts Jimin, at the same time.

"What do you want?" You query, finally talking to him directly. After four days.

"What do you mean by what do you want?" He scoffs, making air quotes to mock your question. "You aren't talking to me and have blocked me on socials. What do you think I want?"

You sigh, once again and once again you look bored. As if you'd prefer to be anywhere but here. "I thought you had a reputation for being a fuckboy or something."

Jimin's brow furrow in confusion. "What does that have anything to do with this?"

"As a fuckboy whose commitment lasts for only one night, you must have faced many instances where you just wanted the girl to just take the hint," you state, speaking in a tone that's so calm that it makes Jimin squirm in discomfort. "Wonder why then, do you not know when to take the hint yourself."

His eyes fall and suddenly all traces of anger and frustration is gone and is replaced by sadness. Jimin looks a like sad kid who has just been told Santa isn't real. 

The look in Jimin's eyes catches you by surprise. He is an expert at making sad eyes to lure someone in. You know that because you have been a victim of it. But Jimin's eyes always had that little spark in them. Something that gave away his act and highlighted the mischief brewing within them. Something that let you on the fact that he's only pretending to be sad. 

However, now that you look into his eyes, they just seem dull. Making it seem like Jimin is sad, maybe for real this time.

You ignore the urge you feel to comfort him and maintain a blank face. Why should you even feel bad for choosing yourself? How many times has he thought or cared about his words and how they have made you feel? How many times was he there to wipe the tears that he made you cry?

Not even once. 

You may be someone who's tough and headstrong but you're also just as soft and loving on the inside. If you give in now and comfort him just to see him happy, you know you will be repeating the same cycle with yourself. And it would be so damn toxic.  

"Are you really not going to talk to me?" He whispers, in a soft voice. 

"I don't want to, trust me." This time your voice is not cold. This time you sound like you. The you, Jimin is familiar with. You don't even seem mad. And that's exactly how Jimin knows that you mean what you're saying.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Jimin has had a tough week. 

Nothing out of the ordinary, perse. He has been going to parties, has been getting drunk and has been the same him. But maybe that's exactly why he is having a tough time. Because despite doing regular 'Jimin' things, he hasn't been feeling like himself. 

He doesn't even know what's wrong. Or maybe he does, he just wants to ignore it and pretend that everything is fine. That he's fine. 

He does his classes and tries his best to focus on the material that's being taught but somehow or the other, he zones out. 

But it's not like it's a big deal. It's normal and all cool. He's fine. 

During football practice, he misses the opportunities that present themselves to him as if he's a blind man. 

But again, that's normal, right? Even the best of players make mistakes. Who's Jimin to not make one? It's fine. He's fine. 

During lunch, he accidentally puts pepper instead of salt in his food. But that's also normal! Nothing out of the ordinary. 

He's fine. 

He repeats these two words in his mind as he makes his way to the next class. However, he is met by a sight that has his steps halting.

It's you. 

You have your head thrown back and you're laughing at something your friend said.

The scene causes a stir of emotions inside him. 

One of the first things he feels is longing. Any other time he would deny it with everything in his being but now that you're in front of him like this, he simply can't. He misses you. He misses talking to you. He misses teasing you. He misses how your nose would scrunch up in annoyance. He misses the way you would chew on your lower lip to hold back from smiling. 

He misses everything about you.

The next emotion that hits him is anger. Here he is, feeling like he can't act and function normally without you, and there you are totally unbothered. 

The thought also scares him. What if, what if you just don't care about him anymore?

If that so happens to be the case, Jimin at least needs to know for sure. He can't be going around like this with a hole in his chest and having unanswered questions in his mind regarding what exactly happened for you to suddenly cut him off like this.

So, the next thing he knows, he's walking towards you. Ignoring the surprised look on your face, he grabs the courage to speak. 

"Can I talk to you for two minutes?"

You look at your watch simply because you need to make an excuse as to why you can't give him the two minutes. "Sorry, I have to head for my class."

Jimin nods, having expected something like that. "We can talk while walking. I'll drop you to your class."

"You don't need to–"

"I want to," he cuts you off with a determined look on his face, not willing to take no for an answer.

Truth be told, you have no intention of talking to him. But somewhere, at the back of your mind, you're curious as to what he might have to say. After all, after one whole week of Jimin not trying to bug you, you had honestly assumed that that was the end of whatever friendship (if you can even call it that) you two had. 

Jimin takes note of the indecisive look on your face and before you can come to a negative decision, he takes hold of your hand and gently tugs you to a side. 

"What–"

"I am sorry but I had to," he says with a tone that conveys nothing but sincerity. 

You're half pissed at Jimin's behaviour but you ignore it nevertheless, thinking that whatever it is that he has to say, it must be serious. Because you have never seen Jimin being like this before. 

"Whatever you want to say, make it quick," you say with a sigh. 

"Why are you cutting me off like this?" Jimin's words are out of his mouth the moment he knows that you're ready to listen to him. It's like he has been waiting for ages to ask you this particular question. 

Your brows furrow for a split second before you scoff. "Is that what this is all about?"

He is confused as to why you're looking at him as if he has asked a really stupid question.

"Yes?" He responds hesitantly. 

You sigh once again, this time much louder and in disbelief. "Oh my gosh, I can't believe this," you mutter to yourself before looking at Jimin and he does not miss the gleam in your eyes. 

"Let me spell it out for you, you were an asshole to me," you state, your voice having a certain hint of anger to them. 

"A-Asshole? How?" He stutters, looking even more confused than before. 

"You knew I had feelings for you, but you couldn't give two shits about it. I had no issues with you not liking me back, but rubbing all your sexual escapades on my face, and flirting with me is a total disregard and disrespect to how I feel."

"I didn't–"

"It doesn't take much for someone to realise that. Anyone with the minimum common sense can figure that out for themselves. But just because your feelings have always been shallow does not mean that the people around you are shallow as well."

There are a lot of responses that come to Jimin's mind but he knows none of those are good enough.

"Do you know how much of a fool I felt when you were being ignorant of the fact that I am a person who feels? I felt so stupid to be hanging out with you when you couldn't even pause and give me the minimum respect I deserve."

Each word of yours hits him like a bullet but he thinks this has been a long time coming. He is willing to take as many hits as it requires, but he just hopes this is not the end. That somehow he gets to redeem himself. No matter how difficult it is. 

"But at some point, you realise that you shouldn't put up with someone who doesn't appreciate you. I know how I deserve to be treated and it's obvious that you don't know how to treat a woman with respect. Hence, I'm afraid we can't be….friends anymore." 

You paused briefly before using the word friends as if you were not even sure if that's what you two were. And it sure as hell, makes Jimin feel shittier than he did moments ago. 

Oh my goodness, he really has messed this up, hasn't he? 

When you turn around to leave, Jimin doesn't stop you, knowing very well there's nothing much he can say to prove that you mean much more to him than what he has made you believe. 

So he lets you go. 

But only with the intention of earning your forgiveness.

Kim Taehyung

February

Tae 🐻:  did you reach home?

You: yes, just did!

Tae 🐻: i see

Tae 🐻: take rest and sleep well

Tae 🐻: also, i got a little something for you 

Tae 🐻: *image attached*

On clicking the picture, you're greeted with a small little teddy bear that looks adorable in every way possible.

It brings a smile to your face and there's a part of you that knows that it's his way of apologising for the dimmed smile you had throughout the day. His words may have been upsetting but at least he knows the effect they have had on you. And you know he's sorry for it. Mayhaps, that makes it a bit easier for you.

You: it's cute 

Tae 🐻: i know 

Tae 🐻: that's exactly why it reminded me of you 

You chuckle and shake your head softly.

He never leaves a chance to flirt.

--------------------------------------------------------------

April

You: you won't believe what happened

Tae 🐻: what

Tae 🐻: What

Tae 🐻: WHAAATTTT

You: a cat just snuggled against me.

You: CAN YOU BELIEVE IT???

You: like i used to be so scared of them 

You: but now i think they are just soft little balls of fur

You: now i want a cat for myself

Tae 🐻: this is so cute for some reason

Tae 🐻: i can just imagine your bright excited smile *sighs*

Tae 🐻: I'm glad you are not scared of cats anymore 👍😌

Tae 🐻: but but but 

Tae 🐻: idk how to feel about you getting a cat

Tae 🐻: what if you get one and then your whole attention is on them and then you forget about me 👉👈

You: 🙄

You: is this supposed to be a joke?

You: can i not have a bear and a cat at the same time???? 😒

You: also, don't worry i doubt the cat can ever get as annoying as you're 

You: so in a way, you'll always be special 😌

Tae 🐻: uhh thank you

Tae 🐻: that's very reassuring 🤗💖

You: well why, you're welcome 🤗

-------------------------------------------------------------------

July

Your phone rings making you alert of an incoming call. Checking the screen you realise that it's Tae. 

"Hello?" You greet in a sing-song voice, your mood suddenly turning bright.

"Hello, my lady," he greets back in a British accent. "How have you been?"

"Same old, mate, same old," you sigh, mimicking his accent. "Work has been hectic."

"It's even worse that I haven't seen you for so many days" he huffs, his accent gone and voice sounding whiny and complaining. Something that makes you think he has a cute adorable pout on his face.

"I know, work decided to be the biggest bitch ever," which is why you and Taehyung have not been able to find free time to spend with each other. 

The lunchtime for his department changed, making it impossible to have lunch together. Your department has way more workload than his does and as a result of which, you always have to stay back at least an hour to complete your share of work.

Taehyung doesn't wait for you or for your work to get done. And in a way, you're glad. You can't imagine how tiring it can be to wait a whole hour after a full day of work when you know you have the option to just go home and lay in bed and do nothing. 

Everyone deserves good rest and sleep after spending a whole day in front of a computer and that includes Taehyung. You'd never expect him to wait for you or do anything that would be at the cost of his discomfort.

Anyways, it's not like you and him have been out of touch. You text him about every silly little thing that would occur throughout your day. It could be a lizard staring at you intensely as if judging the way you're brushing your teeth, and Taehyung will be the first person to know about it. Hence, yes you do miss his presence physically but your days have been filled with him. 

You both have chatted for hours on end, sometimes via text, other times on a call.

This time is no different. You two end up talking for a whole hour before, he says something that ends with your heart skipping a few too many beats.

"Hey man, I won't say I love you on the phone," he jokes, but there's just something in those words that tells you he knows this isn't just a joke. "That's not fair to the both of us."

It is said out of nowhere, yet it fits the context of the conversation as well as of the situation you both are in. 

"Umm, w-well, say it in person I guess." Your cheeks warm up, a bashful smile that is so incredibly shy at the same time, adorning your lips.

"So I will," he whispers as if even though you two are only connected via call, he knows how gentle this moment is and what it means to you.

And then, the conversation is loud again. You with your silliness and him playing along with it and laughing loudly at your antiques.

----------------------------------------------------------------

September

"Why do you look down?" You query as you munch on popcorn.

Taehyung shakes his head, denying anything's wrong. "Nothing, I just feel tired, I guess."

Bullshit. You know Taehyung well enough to know when he's lying. His eyes just twinkle in a certain way as if on alert about being caught. 

"Do you want to leave?" You whisper, paying mind to the people around you. The last thing you want is the people in the movie hall shushing you or glaring at you.

He shakes his head, again. This time more vehemently. "No, I want to watch this movie with you."

You sigh but then speak in a gentle tone. "You know you can tell me right? Anything that's bothering you, you can tell me."

Taehyung looks at you and there's that certain look of vulnerability as if he's scared and worried. But whatever it was that he was looking for, he finds it in your eyes. It makes him decide that yes, he can be honest with you.

"Remember Kira? I saw her today and I guess it just triggered something within me."

Kira. 

How can you forget that name? 

Two months in your friendship and the both of you had discussed your lists of shitty exes and Kira was a topic discussed in detail.

Kira was his first and only girlfriend whom he loved a lot. Their relationship was filled with ups and downs but he never let it come in the way. He was there for her in ways you only see in movies and shows. But alas, things did come to an end. 

What hurt Taehyung more than the relationship coming to an end were the comments made by Kira. She didn't stutter while saying that he's just not the kind of guy she's into. He isn't bulky or muscular. He laughs too much and smiles easily. He isn't intimidating and is very gullible and naive. 

That...that was what broke him.

You remember the day he told you about Kira. It had made you so angry. How could anyone ever say something like that about a person? If you're not interested you're most welcome to leave but why go an extra step to be an asshole and scar someone? 

What was worse was the fact that you could tell Taehyung believed in those words. He thought they were a down point to his character and that it made him unlovable. 

It's also since that day, that you have developed this protectiveness over him. He may not see it but he deserves the absolute best. He deserves to know that it isn't difficult to love him at all, in fact, it might just be the easiest thing in the world. 

But right now, you know that her words from the past are probably being repeated in his mind over and over again. Hence, it becomes your goal to make him see that those words are not true. 

"I understand why it may have been triggering for you," you comment taking hold of his hands and playing with his fingers. "But I assure you, she was only being a bitch because she knew she losing a gem."

Taehyung smiles a smile that does not reach his ears. "Thank you."

"Don't thank me. I'm not done yet."

For the first time this evening, the briefest spark of amusement enters his gaze. 

"I know she hurt you, but if you need a reminder that what she said to you was total bullshit, I'll serve as one."

Your voice comes out firm but there's that tone of love and affection to it, that is simply unmissable.

"People say and do mean things and they hurt us. But their choice of actions and words define them, not us. At some point, you have got to stop and realise that you can't keep hurting yourself because of what someone has said. It's difficult to do that, I know but that difficulty is worth it. You are worth it."

A small, tiny smile appears on Taehyung's lips at your words. Before he can get the words out to express his gratitude, you're speaking again.

"Also, all those things that she made you feel were unlovable about you, make you just that much more lovable. Because that's what makes you, you."

Once you're done, you feel the insecurity hit you that you may have been a little too passionate or that you went overboard. But Taehyung resting his head on your shoulder and muttering the softest of thank you's makes you relax. 

And that's how you watch the rest of the movie. With his head on your shoulders and him constantly wanting some part of his body to be in touch with yours.

---------------------------------------------------------------

December

You were promoted. 

You won't say it was out of the blue, you had seen it coming. Despite that, being recognised and awarded for your hard work, felt nice. 

But your promotion also meant you were now working in a different branch of your office. Same city, a different building. This also meant the chances of you and Taehyung meeting in between work had slimmed down to zero.

But again, it didn't seem to affect the bond you two shared. You two chatted with each other about your day almost regularly. It just didn't feel right, without telling him about the itsy bitsy details of your day-to-day life. 

It was your second week in the new building and by now you had become comfortable enough with the group of fellow employees you were mingling with, for them to ask the very important question. "Do you have someone special in your life?"

The question was asked in good spirits, with raised eyebrows, teasing smiles and mayhaps with an underlying hope that the answer to the question would be 'no' so that they can set you up with the company sweetheart Jeon Jungkook, who you have a hunch, has a crush on you.

Nevertheless, the question makes you stutter. 

It's not a difficult question to answer if the answer is a simple yes or no. But in your case, it's not so simple. It's complicated. 

But how do you explain it to them? 

You don't even know where you and Taehyung lie. You both have never directly addressed the feelings except once or twice. But what does that mean now? Do you two fall under the category of "more than friends, less than lovers"? 

You don't know.

You don't know if he still has feelings for you. What if it was just a phase and now all that you two are is just good friends? What if you're the only one who keeps thinking of the time you had confessed and what if you're the only one to whom the moments spent with the other, mean something special? 

But what if the opposite is true? What if he still has feelings for you, what if it wasn't just a phase? What if the moments spent with you, mean something to him as well?

Gosh, this indeed is complicated.

You take a deep breath and conclude that irrespective of whatever his feelings for you may be. You're someone who cares for him. A lot. 

You don't want to be someone who hurts him, ever. Knowing of the few instances that he has been hurt and the way he has been hurt, you never want to make him feel like he failed at love again. Or that, he isn't worthy of love. 

You don't want to assume that Taehyung has feelings for you. At the same time, you don't want to assume that he doesn't. Because you know, if you assume that he doesn't have feelings for you and act accordingly, and then it turns out that he still did, he will feel crushed.

"Let's just say, I do have a certain someone," you answer with a shy smile.

Your new coworkers look disappointed for a brief second, most likely because now they won't be able to play matchmakers but the disappointment is soon replaced by excitement. 

Multiple questions are thrown your way to know about this special person and you spend the rest of lunch trying to answer them as swiftly as possible.

--------------------------------------------------------------

February

You: why the 🙄 next to her name?

You ask in reference to him re-posting a status update of a co-worker on Whatsapp. Something about company lunch.

Tae 🐻: cause she's annoying! 

You: lmao why so 😂

Tae 🐻: oh boy she has no respect for boundaries 

Tae 🐻: her jokes are in such poor taste and inappropriate

Tae 🐻: it's just annoying and hence would explain the emoji choice

You: damn 

You: that's harsh 

You: but I'll trust your judgement

Tae 🐻: as you should, yes 😒

You: but this has me curious, if you were to put an emoji next to my name, what would it be? 👀

Tae 🐻: damn that's a good question

Tae 🐻: let me think

Tae 🐻: How about this one? ✨

You: huh? 

You: that's kind of unique 

You: why that one though?

Tae 🐻: because you shine, duh

Tae 🐻: and you light up every room you walk into 

Tae 🐻: and this ✨ just suits you 

Yet again, you feel the familiar warmth in your chest that at this point is just very common every time you talk to him.

But that doesn't make these little moments any less special for you.

------------------------------------------------------------

March.

Work was extra tiring today. You couldn't catch a breather. Couldn't even go to lunch. Stayed back after work till eleven.

And now here you're, finally home.

While having your ramen, you decide to respond to texts that you haven't and so open WhatsApp. 

Once done, you check through the status updates of people. It's always nice to know what fun people have been up to while you were being drained of all energy.

However, you frown when Taehyung's status appears on your screen. There are a few paragraphs written about love and how it can change the way you view life. When the next slide appears, it's a picture of him with a girl. He has his arm casually on the girl's shoulder as they smile at the camera. That added with the heart emoji as the caption causes a weird nervous sensation in your stomach. 

You type out a question as a reply to his status.

You: what is all this about? 😂

You add a laughing emoji next to it just to make sure you sound casual and curious.

Taehyung so happens to be online and his response comes quickly.

Tae 🐻: did you not see my status updates? 😂

Tae 🐻: I'm in a relationship ☺️

And just like that, your hands start shaking and the food in front of you gets forgotten.

Jeon Jungkook

It's been almost a month since you confessed to Jungkook. 

During the first week, you tried to reach out to him because you were so angsty to just get some sort of response. You didn't care if it was in the negative or was harsh. Anything was better than this. Anything was better than him just straight out ignoring your presence as if you never existed. 

You just couldn't understand. Did the friendship you two had mean nothing to him? Did you ever mean anything to him? If you did, how could he possibly treat you this way? Did you not deserve at least a proper explanation as to why he was doing what he was doing?

But after a week, you gave up. Your hurt turned into anger. You didn't care what his possible explanation could be. You did deserve better than this. So you ultimately stopped trying to reach out to him.

It's not like it doesn't bother you. Sometimes, it still does. But the difference is, you have stopped expecting anything from him. And that admittedly, makes it a little easier for you.

"What are we doing today?" Namjoon asks with a bright dimpled smile as he took his seat on the chair. 

"Four short interviews and then a late-night show," you reply, quickly opening your pouches to get out the brushes. 

He sighs. "Another round of answering what our love life looks like."

You snicker, finding it hilarious how done he looks. "Another round of you answering on behalf of the team that you all are a little too busy to find time for dating."

Namjoon shakes his head. "Sometimes I wish I didn't know English." 

The thought makes you laugh with your head thrown back.

"Well I can't imagine anyone else being the spokesperson, it would be damn funny."

You really do think that would be the case. Each of the members has a very distinct personality and just imagining what they would be like, is nothing short of amusing to you. 

Your amusement, however, dwindles when your mind comes up with the question about what Jungkook would be like if he were the one translating other members' words into English. But then your mind leads you to imagine how cute his English is, despite being broken. And then your heart ultimately shrank and you had to remind yourself to not think of him.

Namjoon seems to notice your distress and quickly changea the conversation to something else. 

Thankfully, it works. There are no other sad moments where your mind goes to Jungkook and you find yourself enjoying your conversation with Namjoon and that was more than enough. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

It's three in the afternoon, you conclude after checking your watch. Which means another interview left and after that the boys can rest, until the late-night show of course. This also, means that there's another hour for you to just relax in the AC room. After that, you will have to get to work to remove Namjoon's makeup.

You lay down on the sofa and scroll through Instagram. What's better entertainment than this? 

Your fingers get to work and start scrolling, one meme after the other. Some you find hilarious, some you need to read twice to get and some you simply roll your eyes at. But you guess, that's just how memes are.

However, it's after a few more posts that you find one which simply makes you blink in disbelief. 

It's a picture from the news outlet dispatch. The picture in question is of Jungkook's with his arms around a woman. On reading the caption you realise that the said woman is, Niki from the girl group JION. And to no one's surprise, the photo has caused a stir on the internet and apparently, everyone's talking about it. 

You exit Instagram and open Google. You search for Jungkook and Niki are immediately met with a bunch of articles. Each of them discusses their possible relationship and whether or not they are dating. 

When you feel like you have had enough of the sick churning of your stomach, you close all apps and just shut your phone. 

Wow. 

This is something.

It leaves you perplexed and with a bunch of emotions, you have no idea how to deal with. 

Was he already seeing the woman when you left that note? Gosh, if that's the case, it would be so embarrassing. 

Is that why he thought it would be best to just get rid of you? Was that why he made that sudden move out of nowhere? Couldn't he just tell you that he is dating someone else? Learning this from a news outlet, for every reason, feels painful.

It's not even the fact that he is dating someone. It's just the fact that you both have become such strangers that he feels like a distant person you once used to know. All because you decided to trust him with your feelings.

But most likely it didn't matter. Your feelings didn't matter. You're someone who's always behind the scenes, someone who no one knows. But him? He is the world-renowned artist. He is the one who earns in millions and has an army of fangirls, quite literally. Why should he waste his time caring about how you feel? More importantly, why did you expect him to? 

It was undoubtedly a mistake on your part to have trusted him. As they say, expectations lead to heartbreaks and maybe you had to learn it the hard way. 

But that doesn't mean the pain is anywhere near acceptable. You needed a way to vent your anger, so you do the only thing that comes to your mind.

You block him on all social media sites.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Two weeks since the rumour about Jungkook and Niki dating begun and it's still all over the net. Why, you ask? Because the two people involved in the matter aren't helping their case at all. 

They have been spotted several times together and thus have been fuelling the rumours further. 

It angered you. Weren't idols supposed to be very careful about their relationships? Why were then, these two, flaunting their relationship for the world to see?

You're aware you sound bitter and ridiculous because no one should have to hide if they are dating someone but you just can't help yourself. No matter how hard you try, news about Jungkook and Niki would somehow or the other appear on your feed, be it on insta or Google. It just became unavoidable as these two were everywhere.

The comments didn't help either. People adored them. 

Apparently, these two were the perfect match for each other. Both maknaes of their individual groups and both fan favourites. 

It made it suck all the more for you. 

Argh. 

"Have you seen my chapstick?" Namjoon asks as soon as he enters the room. "Hobi just lectured me about how I should always keep my lips moisturised." 

"It should be in the drawer," you reply and get up to look for the chapstick. "Let me check once."

As it turns out, it indeed was in the drawer. You hand the small tube to him and as soon as you take a seat again, the door swings open to reveal someone you would have never imagined seeing. 

Niki.

"Namjoon oppa," she smiled, putting her dimples on display. "I was looking for you."

Namjoon turned around at the sound of his name. His expression too turns into that of surprise when he realises who it is. "Niki! I didn't know you'd be coming."

Huh, makes the two of us. 

The two idols chit chat and you ignore all of it. Simply, because they seem to get along really well and if there's one thing you know about Namjoon it's how protective he is of all the members. But if he likes and approves of Niki, well you guess she and Jungkook might just be the perfect match. 

It's not like Niki totally ignores your presence. She shoots you a smile that's sweet and warm, and you smile at her right back. Your's looking a tad bit less sincere.

Thankfully, whatever conversation the two of them were having soon comes to an end and Niki leaves the room. 

As soon as it is just you and Namjoon, you blurt out the question you have been wanting to ask for a long time. 

"Are they really dating?" 

Namjoon doesn't seem too surprised by your question, if anything he looks like he expected it. However, he does look hesitant to answer. "Umm, yes they are."

Shit. 

You don't know why you had to ask the question but you did, and now you got your pretty little confirmation and now you're hurting again. 

Well, shit, indeed.

But but but, why was Namjoon hesitant to answer? Was he perhaps aware you had feelings for Jungkook? Had Jungkook told him the reason of requesting a change? 

Fuck, you should really have kept your curiosity to yourself because now your mind is running wild and it's not helping you at all. 

"But, I don't think it's anything serious," Namjoon adds after a beat of silence then nods as if reassuring himself that it was the right thing to say.

It makes you even more paranoid that Namjoon knows about your little more than crush on Jungkook and it makes you want to flee from the spot. 

"Uhmmm, I need to pee," you squeak out and immediately shut your eyes because gosh that was stupid. 

"Uhh, okay." Thankfully, Namjoon isn't weirded out by your silly choice of words. Instead, he looks amused and there might have been something else in his gaze but you are too embarrassed to take notice.

You quickly leave the room and rush your way to the washroom. As soon as you're in, you splash your face with water.

What the fuck? Does Namjoon know? Does it mean that the other members know too? How are you ever going to face them again? 

Shit. Shit. Shit.

This is no good. You should have never confessed. You should never have listened to those excited beats of your heart and to those fluttering butterflies. Look where it got you.

"Don't worry about it, babe. It's all cool, it's all under control now." A voice reaches your ears from one of the stalls in the washroom. 

You assume the woman must be talking on the phone and you ignore it.

"Yes, I know how you feel about it but trust me this whole thing with Jungkook should be over in like a few weeks."

Now, that has your ears all perked up in attention. 

"You know, I don't even like him like that."

What. The. Fuck. 

"I'm not mad at you for it, relax babe, I love you."

And just like that, you hear the toilet flush and the doorknob jiggling followed by Niki stepping out. 

You pour the liquid soap on your hand and wash your hands with them just to look like you weren't eavesdropping on her conversation with her babe. 

Although, could it really be called eavesdropping when she was speaking so loudly? 

Thankfully, Niki doesn't find your behaviour suspicious and leaves the washroom with a small smile lingering on her lips. 

Uhh okay then. 

This is something. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

As soon as the shock dials down and you could think, you knew you had to tell someone. 

You don't know what and how to say, though. You can't just claim that Niki is cheating on Jungkook, despite your initial assumption being that. Because people call their siblings babe too right? Or their best friends? Yes, you can't just assume that she's having an affair behind everyone's back. 

But what you're plenty sure of and have heard Niki admitting is that she does not have feelings for Jungkook. What the heck is going on then? 

Before your mind can start running in circles, the door swings open announcing someone's arrival. Much to your relief, it's Namjoon, someone you can be honest with, without worrying about the technicalities. 

"Listen, I need to talk to you about something," you say, your voice coming out nervous yet firm.

Namjoon takes notice of your nervousness and smiles at you warmly, hoping to put you at ease. "Sure, go ahead."

"I went to the washroom and uhm, I heard Niki talking on the phone about something and I think you should know about it."

A small frown appears on Namjoon's face because of all things, he did not expect that what you had to say was anything related to Niki. He, however, keeps quiet and gives you an encouraging hum to go on. 

"I–She told someone over the phone that she doesn't really have feelings for Jungkook."

Namjoon looks as shocked as you had been but his shock wears off much much quicker than yours did. 

For the first time, he looks a little awkward having this conversation. Scratching the back of his neck, he gives you a small awkward chuckle. "I see what you're saying."

Your first thought to this reaction is that he does not believe you. It would make sense for that to be the case if Jungkook really had told Namjoon about the note. But that does not mean you don't feel incredibly offended and hurt right now. Just because you liked Jungkook does not mean you'd be lying. Is that how much faith Namjoon had in you?

"I'm not lying!" Your voice doesn't hide the emotions you're feeling, not that you were trying to hide them anyway. 

Namjoon's eyes widen and he immediately shakes his head. "No, no, no. That's not what I meant."

You cross your arms and look at him with a scowl, refusing to believe his words. "What did you mean then?" 

He yet, again looks a little sheepish as he answers, "It's just that I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything to me," you reply without missing a beat. "This has nothing to do with me. It has to do with Jungkook. Tell him that this girl probably has some ulterior motives or something. Save him from the heartbreak he will inevitably go through when he comes to that realisation himself."

"You're right, that's exactly what I should do." Something in Namjoon seems to click and he nods. "Wait, I'll be right back."

Just like that, he's walking out in a hurry leaving you all alone in the room. 

---------------------------------------------------------------

It's been fifteen minutes since Namjoon left. 

At first, you were walking with hurried steps from one end of the room to the other but then your anxiety got too much for you and you decided to sort out the skincare items and put them in place. 

Productivity is better than burning calories by walking in circles in a room. Right?

You were only putting the new moisturizer in the drawer when someone clears their throat to announce their presence. 

It rightfully startles you and you let out a small yelp. 

However, when you realise who the person standing in front of you is, it makes your stomach sink. 

Jungkook. 

The same Jungkook you have been avoiding for weeks. Not that it was difficult though, he had never really made any effort to reach out to you. But whatever. 

You swiftly look away from him and get back to work, not wanting to pay him any attention. Why should you? You're not his makeup artist anymore, he does not have any business to be here. 

"Umm, I need to talk to you about Niki." 

You don't respond.

Your silence is met with a sigh from Jungkook. 

"Hyung told me what you heard Niki say. Ummm can you please not share it with anyone else?" 

Maybe it was something about the way the words were phrased but they did not sit well with you.

Your hands pause and a scoff of disbelief makes its way past your lips. Is...is that what he wanted to talk to you about? 

That too, of all things to ask you to not tell others about it? As if you had told Namjoon about it to spread some sort of gossip. The only reason you bothered with it was because....well, you were worried for Jungkook. 

But imagine caring about someone despite being treated the way Jungkook treated you and then that person coming to talk to you for the first time in weeks only to tell you not to get involved. As if it was by choice. 

One thing was for sure, you were this close to letting out the words you have been holding in for a long long time. Your position as a makeup artist be damned. 

"It's just that if word gets out she will be framed as the wrong guy."

She....she will be the one framed as the wrong guy? And you being the one who could potentially do it, doesn't make you sound like the villain? What he's saying is you could do something that could end up making Niki the victim.

That's it. You have had enough. 

"Do you even know what you're saying?"  You speak the words out with your tone laced with every bit of anger you have been keeping in for weeks. 

Jungkook winces. "I do–"

"Let me finish. I have no business telling people what I heard Niki speak on the phone with lord knows who. Heck, if I was selfish I would have just stayed out of it because who's gonna believe my words against those millions of articles and fans shipping you two? But the only reason I thought you should know about it is because what if you really loved her or something? Knowing it later when you're much more invested would be way more painful and crushing." 

Something enters in his gaze but you're too furious to notice or to even pause to give him the time to form a response.

"Not to mention that you treated me like trash. Didn't bother talking to me. Changed your staff without giving a proper reason. Heck, I might just be a make-up artist and you might be a world-renowned artist but I thought we were more than that," for the first time since you started speaking, your voice goes quiet. "To me, you were more than the idol everyone sees. Maybe that's why I assumed I was also someone more than just a make-up artist to you."

"But I guess I was wrong," your voice cracks and as soon as the sound of your wavering voice reaches your ears, you know it's time to shut up. Because no way in hell are you going to cry in front of Jungkook. 

But somehow that single voice crack says a lot.

You have seen Jungkook cry in pain and frustration. You have seen him laugh until his stomach started to hurt. You have seen him drink until he's all giggles and smiles. Those moments had led you to believe that you two were friends, at least. But then if you two ever were friends, he has disrespected that friendship way too much for you to be calm about it.

Jungkook looks at the ground as if it would magically give him the answer to the question of what he should do now. When it doesn't, Jungkook battles himself and ultimately decides that it's best for him to simply say the truth.

He has complicated things enough.

"Niki and I aren't dating." 

------------------------------------------------------

Permanant Taglist:

@bloodline1632 @embrace-themagic @jeonsorchid @fragmentof-indiffernce @royallyjjk @jeonninja @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @blairscott @jungkookslittlebun @hunbun07 @chimchimmarie

Fic Taglist:

@coffeedepressionsoup @perfectlyfangirling @armydgirl

[riki-riks-chick]

hii! do you write only for smut or for sfw too? If so, I was wondering if you could do a spiderman!jake x reader. Maybe an evil Spiderman (sorry i don’t know much about marvel 😭) kidnaps reader cause he knows that’s Spider-Man’s weakness then Jake saves the day 🫡

Third Person POV~

 "Sir watch out!" Jake had almost "too" quickly grabbed an older man, saving him from the speeding van that had almost just hit him. The man had gasped at the sudden movement, thanking Jake as he handed him his cane. "Thank you, young man.. I remember when I was that young and agile."

Jake can only smile at the man's words before speeding off. He's already gotten into enough trouble, but he's determined to keep his promise to you. 

He'd decided to take the "quicker" way, opting to web sling his way over the foot traffic crowding the streets below. He was hoping no one would see him because his mask is in his backpack, but it was worth it if he could get to you faster.

When he'd finally made it to your designated meeting spot, he was confused to see you gone. You had texted maybe five minutes ago, showing a picture of the pretty picnic you'd set up, but he wasn't seeing anything right now.

He had immediately felt that something was wrong, his spidey senses tingling as he pulled his mask out of his bag so he could slip it on just in case. He'd called you first, not wanting to assume anything bad happened, but when you didn't answer after multiple phone calls, he got worried.

He was ready to run off and attempt to find you, but when his phone dinged with a message from your number, he rushed to open it. The message read, "Come to this location and your pretty girlfriend lives." 

After that came a location and another message that said the floor to go to. The rooftop.

Jake didn't waste any time, slinging himself across multiple buildings until he reached the mentioned one, pulling himself up to the rooftop.

He'd glanced around before finding you dangling over the edge of the roof, held only by a very familiar, green-hued hand. 

 "What do you want with me, Green Goblin?!" He yelled, his eyes never leaving your form as you turned your head to look at him, clearly sobbing behind the tape that covered your mouth. "I want you dead." Green Goblin replied, tilting you further over the edge as Jake attempted to grab you with his web, missing due to how quick Green Goblin was able to move you. 

 "Now, now... Did you really think it'd be that easy?.." He snickered as Jake cursed under his breath, watching Green Goblin rip the tape from your mouth. "Come on sweetheart... Tell your boyfriend that if he gives up, you'll live."

"Don't do it!" You yell, crying out of fear as Green Goblin tilts you over the edge once more. "Make your choice Spider-Man."

Jake stood stunned, he couldn't fathom the decision at hand. Without Spider-Man, the world would cease to destruction and chaos. Without you he wouldn't be motivated to save the world that his world lived in.

Green Goblin had snickered, pulling you back up before heading towards the edge of the building. "I see you need some time to think. I'll see you once you have your answer."

And then he was gone, leaving a green cloud of smoke and fog as Jake groaned. He almost immediate left the rooftop in a daze, heading to his most trusted allie, Park Sunghoon.

"Come on, Sunghoon.. I can't beat this guy alone! He has Y/n!" Jake yells as Sunghoon groaned. "My Iron Man days are over. You know that better than anyone else."

 "Just do it for me!" Jake pleads, his eyes growing teary at the thought of losing you. Sunghoon sighs, glancing towards another longtime friend. "Cap.. I'm in if you're in." 

 "Must you drag me into everything?.." Jay asks with a sigh as Jake thanks the both of them. "You guys are great. Oh my god."

 "Slow down.. Jay and I will track him down. He's probably in some hidden warehouse or something. When we find him, don't act on emotion. He'll probably set up a trap for you to fall into. We get Goblin first and then your girlfriend." Sunghoon explains as Jake nods. "I understand."

Later that night, Jay and Sunghoon had managed to track the Goblin down. They had almost immediately suited up and made their way to the location, telling Jake to stay back while they scoped it out.

He waited patiently, hearing a loud scream as he immediately ran in, seeing you hanging over a large pool of only god knows what.

"Spider-Man.." Jake's heart aches at the smallest detail of you still not calling him by name, but by Spider-Man to keep his identity concealed. You were always so thoughtful, and he hated it because you would give your life for his so easily.

"I'm gonna save you, just hold on.."

"Spider-man! Over here." He turned his head, seeing the Goblin as he immediately went into combat mode. Slinging his webs, throwing fists, and drawing the Green Goblin away from you to enable Iron Man and Captain America to save you.

He kept The Goblin busy, fighting him until he sees Jay carrying you out of the warehouse. He then webs Green Goblin as he gets distracted, tying him up and then knocking him out. 

He then throws him into the pool you were previously suspended over, which he found out was acid. 

He then slings himself out of the warehouse where you're safe with Captain America and Iron Man. "Baby..." He smiles, hugging you as he takes his mask off. "I'm so sorry I let him take you like that.. I was so worried."

 "It's okay.. I'm glad you're safe." You smile, kissing him. "Let's get you home.. Okay?.."

I'mma keep it real i hate this. Took FOREVER just to suck. i hope anon that requested this likes it tho

[king-midas-fortnite]

Hello. I assume there is little need for introduction, but I am Midas. I've recently returned from a brief..."sabbatical", shall we call it, in the Underworld.

My daughter, Jules thought it would be a good idea to keep a blog. Not sure why. Something about venting feelings, connecting with other people not in my crew, etc. Not exactly things I find very high priority, but I suppose it can't kill me. I'd know better than anyone what can, after all. And perhaps it'll make keeping tabs on people of interest easier...

Feel free to reach out, if you wish. Message me, tag me, whatever the case may be. I'll do my best to be active here. Whatever it takes to make my daughter happy. However, I am a busy man. Apologies if I miss anything.

((Keep reading for rules and notes!))

--------------------------------------------------

Rules and guidelines for interacting!

1. This blog is run by an adult. I am 26, my main is @snippydippy. Please keep this in mind when interacting with me. I ask that minors please consider a different Midas.

I will use (()) to indicate when I'm speaking out of character in any posts!

2. I don't mind NSFW content myself, but may not answer questions or reblog content pertaining to sexually explicit topics to keep things relatively appropriate.

3. This blog may contain ship content, it may not. I have ships I like, they may not be the ones you do. While my version of Midas is cis, he's not straight (bi king). If this bothers you, I don't know what to tell you.

4. My DMs and asks will always be open! Please don't be shy, Midas won't bite. I'm down to RP in the reblogs with anyone! However, DM roleplays for other adults only, please.

5. This blog will always be skewed towards a more serious vibe. I take my characterization of Midas very seriously (more so than I probably should for a FN character lol). You won't find much in the way of him being a silly guy. Even if I find it funny, if I don't think a situation would be in character for my version of him, it won't happen.

That's it as far as my rules go aside from the obvious "don't be a dick" sentiments that I feel I shouldn't have to say. Thank you for reading them! Next are just a couple notes on my headcanons for Midas.

-Midas has some control over his Golden Touch. I think of the curse in a way that is similar to chronic pains. Some days, it is manageable, and he can touch whatever he'd like without issue. Some days, it is bad. He has to avoid people, can't eat, and struggles getting through mundane tasks without frustration.

I believe his curse may also be in part tied to his emotions. Any intense anger, sadness, or other strong feelings will make it harder to control the Touch, and it does cause him some amount of pain when it's out of control. (Doing mental gymnastics to explain why Fortnite itself isn't consistent with his power.)

-Jules means everything to Midas. He will do absolutely anything in his power to keep his daughter safe and to keep his relationship with her in good standing. He's wronged her in the past, and is doing all he can to make up for those actions and lost time.

-His time in the underworld changed him a bit. He's less cold to the people close to him. He allows more feeling than pure calculation into his thought processes, but a stranger may not be able to tell. Midas is a relatively closed off man. He does not wear his emotions on his sleeve, and doesn't often make friends without some kind of benefit to be had from the relationship. Be it power or connections. However, the friendships he does have mean a great deal to him. He is quick to provide aid in any way he can to those he cares about.

Another thing about his imprisonment in Hell: Time in the underworld was experienced differently. While we may have waited four years for Midas to return, for him it was much, much longer. Now that he is back, he is determined to never be put in chains ever again.

-My version of him obviously has not left the island after returning from the underworld, instead opting to stay as his curiosity for how things have changed has gotten the better of him. He wants to keep up with the power struggles, and find a way to insert himself back into them.

This blog is semi-independent! Some lore is shared with @perseus-ihatemydad-fortnite in that he helped Midas escape from the Underworld. As well as most often being seen interacting with @kado-fortnite and @valeria-fortnite

Tags I'll use!

#Midas Answers -For asks answered in character

#Midas Posts -For interactions in character

#Gold Reserves -In-character reblogs of art, aesthetic posts, etc.

#Gold Encounter -For interactions between other characters that are meant to be read as happening in-person/privately

#Journal Entries - For uh. For Journal Entries lol. These are, in a meta sense, private to him. They are for interactions that happen on the Discord server rather than Tumblr for reader convenience.

- 👑 for anon messages

#Shut your trap snippy -For posts like these that include me talking OOC (I know, long tag. It's just what I've been using on my main blog for years to tag my own garbage lol)

Screenshot in this post and my header are from @corvidazed 💛

Thank you for getting all the way down here! I hope our interactions are fun!

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 6 thoughts

sighs as if i just ran a marathon.

so, you know i take a LOT of notes. but this episode was SUCH a ride that i'm gonna try a new method of copying all this down. stick with me and let's see how it goes.

okay here we are. back after our brief and sorrow-filled separation yesterday, in which i had no time to watch an episode. it’s Scully hours. hopefully.

first thing we see is mulder walking into his place in the rain. first thing i do is pause and see if i can analyze the art on his walls. they’re some sort of prints of houses? not noticing anything in particular in terms of style or artist. and it’s definitely a new place where he lives, rip the sleep couch from s1

he takes off his jacket and listens to the message she left him and oh fuck. oh fuck. her voice. the sound of duane yelling. shattering glass.

he goes to her house and sees blood and the open window!!!! the TERROR that man must have been feeling. and he uses that FBI id to sneak right in there.

now he’s prowling about her house in search of clues and looking at her blood and hair left behind which is fucked up, even by my standards 

it was at this point i wrote "he’s like a bloodhound" which is a statement i stand by and can elaborate on if prompted

OH! we see a familiar face. he meets scully's mom. while his hands are soaked in her daughter’s blood. that's okay that's fine (said in a shaking and squeaky voice).

THE OPENING SAID SOMETHING DIFFERENT: DENY EVERYTHING. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

(at this point i made a note expressing concern that we were gonna watch scully get tortured for 45 minutes straight and thank god that isn't what actually went down. because i would have been deeply upset if that had happened and would have launched upon an unstoppable rant for the next few generations)

scully's mom dreamed about her being taken away and Mulder WRAPS HIS ARMS AROUND HER. again. while still covered in her blood. what a way to meet her family. not how anyone had pictured this going down.

so it's the next morning and alex is in this meeting while mulder is having a come apart. don’t wish him to be here. and no, alex does not get the respect of being referred to by his last name like a good agent on MY account where i make the rules and the rules are that he sucks.

when rationalizing what duane is going through, skinner said “so he’s following orders from the alien voices in his head? That’s an interesting spin on the Nuremberg defense” and yeah! i chuckled. was he wrong there?

skinner made me laugh with that little remark but then went back to pissing me off by telling mulder he was too close to the case and needed to go home. like yes, he’s right, but mulder's gonna put his bloodhound skills to destructive purposes. he's gonna rip up the couch if left home alone. in a dog metaphorical sense.

so alex takes him home which was bad enough (alex must know where mulder lives to do that) and we see CIGARETTE MAN IN THE BACKGROUND????? my original notes had a lot stronger language at this reveal that i felt i needed to tone down but i will keep the "i'll have ur head im sooo serious" part in

okay, back to duane cam. he’s cruising. he cranks his window down when he’s pulled over which is still funny to me. crank windows. how novel. but don't think i've forgotten the situation at hand just because 90's technology is funny to me.

a cop pulls him over and i felt a flicker of hope inside my chest but i knew deep down it was still too early in the episode for anything to be resolved. still, duane pulling out his gun and SHOOTING the cop made my jaw drop

(my jaw kept dropping this episode to an extent that was painful. i just got my wisdom teeth out and while i love enjoying this show, the constant twists and turns are NOT leading to a pleasant mouth experience)

SCULLY IN THE TRUNK REVEAL? <- that was all i wrote when i saw here in there. i feel it sums up the situation.

mulder, somehow, taps into where she's located and gets a visual on her. he is intensely effected and this is why i support his bloodhound-like tendencies being channeled. the man gets results.

alex, don’t ask how he slept. you are a rat and should be banished from his presence during his state of mourning and forever after. 

mulder: doesn't route 229 lead to the blue ridge parkway?

alex: I don’t know <- okay lmao I get that. i get that alex. like directions are hard. you haven't won me over but you did make me laugh here.

mulder figured out where they’re going and says GET THE CAR ALEX and that “he’ll deal with skinner”. ohhh i wanna see this furious mulder deal with skinner. OHHHH i'm so on the edge of my seat this sleep deprived man is gonna <- didn't even finish that sentence due to the next reveal

WHO THE HELL IS ALEX TALKING TO ABOUT “HOLDING HIM OFF” WHY IS CIGGY MAN HERE (can you hear the desperation in all of the notes i was taking. also i don't know his name and i don't care. that's cigarette man or ciggy man if i need to use shorthand and his government name is probably "rat bastard" but i don't care enough to use it)

mulder was, at this point, falling asleep and almost hitting a truck but insisting he can still drive. wild. on the one hand, i get it, because alex is probably gonna drive them off the road and something, but then on the other hand buddy. u almost got plowed in the negative context. someone fetch him a red bull

(and yeah i googled "red bull origins" to see if that would have been possible at the time for mulder to have a sip and can confirm it would have been IF he had gotten it imported from another country. because it wasn't in the us yet. i am a scholar)

alex is listing how many awful things are caused by sleep deprivation. which i understand and again, a good argument to be made, but this grease weasel just wants to get behind the wheel so he can total the thing and i'm not having it 

(he said some like after this and it was just “there’s our turn off” but my hatred for him reached a crescendo at this point like I could have started pummeling)

so they get to the place on the mountain that takes you up- the ski lift thingy. and the guy who works it is like "you can't use it, we don't test it in the summer" and wow. when i tell you what happens next, i hope you are seated. because i had to pause and breathe for a bit.

MULDER PULLS HIS GUN OUT AND THREATENS THE DUDE WHO SAYS HE CAN’T TAKE THE CABLE SKI THINGY UP OHHHHH MY GAWDDDDD 

so he gets access to the lift thingy and he locked alex out… yes exactly right!

the lift operator is like "don't go over 15 miles per hour" and we all know what mulder is gonna do next. he cranks it up way too fast and he’s gonna fall into the mountain and i’m looking around my room like what is going on here. the cuts to Alex’s snaky eyes are freaking me tf out. Why is alex reaching for his gun. WHAT THE FUCK WHY FID HE KNOCK THAT GIY OUT HE CIT THE GENERATOR AND LEFT MULDER UP THERE WHO IS HE CALLONH 

(<- leaving that one verbatim from my notes, too, because i feel it really captures the experience, if you can work out those typos. basically alex took his gun out and knocked the lift operator out, leaving mulder stranded on the ski lift in the sky, then called someone like "i've got him trapped" and i. was experiencing all of this very quickly.)

scully cam. she’s still in the trunk.

so the power's cut on the ski lift and mulder is not gonna just sit around and wait for somebody to help him! he's climbing up the tower and once he’s up there ALEX TURNS THE MACHINE BACK ON SERIOUSLY WHAT IS GOING ON

mulder survives the journey to the mountain's peak, despite almost falling off because he was hanging from outside!! and alex looks soooooooooooo mad.

sad man in the rain finds a car with blood in the wheel and...

HER NECKLACE IN THE BACK!!! AN EPISODE 3 CALL BACK!!! to when he knew eugene tooms was going after her because he found her necklace. oh i'm gonna be SICK

back to our worstie duane, who is in the woods screaming that they took her and that he’s free and I had to pause to breathe a lil. because if mulder lost scully and his sister to aliens...... 

after what was intended to be a commercial break and some wrestling on behalf of mulder, we see duane in custody, but receive no answers on what exactly is going on. he is, however, in a small room with mulder, who looks entirely diabolical.

mulder is stalking this guy- "stalking" in the sense that he is like a predator waiting for a chance to pounce on a rabbit- and he gets up and SEES SCULLY'S BLOOD AND HAIR ON DUANE'S HOSPITAL WRISTBAND???

next occurs what i described in my notes as the "DID YOU HURT HER SCREAMING AND TORTURE SESSION. JAW IS ON THE FLOOR" (my poor jaw. who will think of her in these trying times)

again, mulder is in his animal era, because he starts choking duane. REALLY choking him. i'm shocked. between this and the showing his gun to get to the top of the mountain, we are really seeing how he will throw all of the rules to the side and spit on them to keep the people he loves safe.

(i was also thinking to myself at this point, his ass is gonna get fired)

duane was taunting him, saying "i hope they’re not hurting her too much with the tests” which is. obviously evil. but HOW evil? it's still unclear if he is lying about the whole alien thing, because remember, scully said the bullet in his brain makes him a liar who is unpredictable. and i guess a bullet could maybe do that. i have no experience in such matters.

mulder says everyone STAY OUT OF THERE and yet. alex goes in to see duane. and is like "well i went in there because he was gagging". sure yeah. suspicious. why were you close enough to hear him gag? how do you know the sound of another man gagging, alex? heard it before?

okay this next part was. pretty messed up. i'll let my reactions from being in the moment speak for themselves because i have little desire to relive the matter:

SCULLY IN A WEIRD ASS ROOM???? THE ALIENS? What the hell I’m deeply uncomfortable are they blowing her up like a balloon. Oh I got chills. Negative 

(i never want to see a character blown up like a balloon it's just not for me. i am always gonna be good on that front)

((who is blowing her up and why. i was convinced it was aliens at first but now i think it was actually the Evil Government which has me thinking, what kind of situation led them to developing that technology in the first place?))

mulder pulls alex out of the room “NO ONE is to interrogate the suspect” “except you?” “except me” <- mulder with a god complex because scully is missing and he will do ANYTHING to find her. oh yeah that's juicy. i'm gonna dive into that at a later date.

skinner yells at mulder. yeah he had it coming. even if i enjoy his character arc i do think choking your only suspect comes across as a bit. well. unprofessional, shall we say.

mulder is shocked that duane is gagging like he didn’t just choke the guy and he might have KILLED his own best lead and has to live with whatever knowledge duane had on her whereabouts dying with him 

mulder staring at the corpse. cause of death: asphyxiation. oh he killed that dude. he is gonna be in trouble. 

(that was my first thought, anyway. i wasn't picking up what mulder was putting down, requesting a toxicology report. to me, if you show a scene of a guy getting choked, and then he dies a few minutes later, it's another situation of "i don't know enough about medical stuff to dispute that". mulder, however, WILL dispute that)

next part is copied and pasted from the rough notes again because it's funny:

"alex go fuck yourself i don’t even wanna look at you. getting in the car with ciggy man. “what about scully?” “we’ve taken care of that” ARE YOU THE MFER BLOWING HER UP LIKE A BALLOON CIGGY MAN???? alex is questioning things but idgaf if he’s morally conflicted"

(i saw the seeds of an alex redemption arc being sown here and i didn't care for it. condemn him. to the dungeons.)

mulder’s super insistent that he did NOT kill duane and again i was like. well are you sure. because it kinda looks like you did.

they want him to take a lie detector test which always makes me cringe. if polygraphs have no haters its because i'm dead.

mulder believes that duane was actually poisoned by the government to hide Something and he presents this theory to skinner and his panel which was Bold but you know our boy mulder. bold is what he does.

“why are you so paranoid Mulder” asks some random guy from the council in an annoyed fashion << terribly insensitive thing to say to guy who just had his best friend kidnapped

“I find it hard to trust anybody” (cutscene to asking Alex for his keys) NAURRR YOU CANNOT TRUST THE WEASEL 

alex gives him the keys and leaves with a long lingering stare. okay. freak.

mulder's going to the senator!!!! i was hoping we would get more info on that whole deal- why does this guy sponsor mulder? why does he do it if he knows it's a bad idea? how do they even know each other? is he a republican? - but we really don't gain any insight. he runs into Deep Throat 2.0, who I believe to be a handsome fellow, and he says that They will deny everything

who is they, i mumble quietly to the screen. why do they know all the things??

mulder is in visible and irreparable agony when getting in the car but he still has a funky tie on. despite the horrors his swag must persist.

GASP!! Mulder opens the car drawer and sees the cigarettes of famed ciggy man. alex is too pretty to smoke...

Mulder puts two and two together FAST and accuses alex of being a rat to skinner (which he’s right about!) he says he stands behind his accusation on the record and skinner tries to call alex up

(which was so funny to me because if he was a secret double agent- which he is- and mulder is accusing him of something adjacent to treason- what is a talk in skinner's office gonna do to solve the problem? again skinner is giving me high school principal energy. ur not gonna talk that one out babe but it's sweet you gave it a go xx)

mulder says that scully got too close to whatever the truth is when she had that little tracker thing and so they got her. i find myself agreeing with the guy who believes elvis faked his death. funny how he's often the level headed one

skinner, to my surprise, is taking this accusation of his agents being of the double variety quite well. he actually seems pretty reasonable about the whole thing, and like he truly believes there is some ulterior motives at play here.

but sympathy isn't enough for mulder: “What CAN you do” he asks Skinner, thrusting a finger in his face. “There’s only one thing I can do,” skinner sighs, and he... REOPENS THE X FILES?

(now this did shock me, but i was excited! don't get me wrong, i was just a bit surprised. i was thinking maybe he'd call up ciggy man and try to have a nice dignified chat since he seems so hell-bent on solving things through the power of discussion, but i suppose that reauthorizing the investigation into aliens while a top agent is missing for doing just that is. certainly an approach to the problem at hand?)

mulder walks sadly beneath a water fountain. it was sad enough as it was but then scully's mom walks up and things get even More sad

to somewhat break the air of tragedy: for some reason his face is crystal clear but hers is superrrrr blurry. like i've mentioned before, some shots are normal tv quality, and others look like they were ripped from a VHS. it throws me off each time.

but back to the matter at hand: he gives her scully’s cross necklace and he’s like "why did she wear that if she was such a skeptic" (which is a question i keep pointing out!!!!!!) and we learn the answer:

it was a gift from her mother on her 15th birthday. which i can and Will analyze in depth at a later date. the gift of a religious object to further solidify the need from her family to be Perfect and never fail and do exactly as they say. but scully choosing to wear it anyway, decades later, to hold her family close, no matter the pain of disappointing them. when she mindlessly reaches for the pendant to roll in her fingers, does she feel the warmth of family or the chill of their expectations she can never meet?

but. mulder tries to give her the necklace. and she says that he can give it to her when he finds her. not if. when.

he goes to a hill and looks up at the sky.

this episode was intense, and i will be gnawing on it like a bone for a while. seeing mulder and scully's mom together made me incredibly emo. seeing him break all the rules to find her also made me emo. trying to figure out if skinner is a real one and the ratio to which alex is genuinely evil vs just stupid were some serious cases of mental chess. and duane. we all wanna know what his deal is. and where is alex! he doesn't have to come back, don't get me wrong, but... did he fall off the face of the earth? go back to massachusetts for a dunkin run? i know that smug new englander look he has about him. don't sit here and tell me he grew up in kansas i won't buy it.

anyway, i saw the description of the next episode- so we're going back to an x file. i find it hard to imagine that mulder will have emerged from bloodhound mode by then, so maybe he thinks it's connected somehow and will go on a quest for answers in that direction- a vampire direction? hmm. guess i'll just have to tune back in!

[caelumsnuff]

Oh boy, aren't you just tired of those damn opinions in your fandom?

If you would like to stop seeing my opinions and those of others who don't think exactly like you, i have a great little tool to tell you about called "Blocking."

By blocking me or anyone else who posts opinions that oppose your own, you no longer have to see our posts and we are incapable of interacting with your blog via likes, reblogs, replies, messages, or asks (unless we operate on side blogs, that is). Unfortunately, blocking someone on tumblr never will prevent them from seeing your posts, so you will just have to live with that fact. (Telling other people to block you does nothing positive for you!)

Here, i'll teach you how using myself as an example;

Blocking on your main blog vs your side blog are two different tasks, but ill explain both.

If you are on your main blog, you will need to click on the blog of the person you are wanting to block. It should look something like this.

You're going to want to click on that small button with three horizontal dots, which will open a drop down menu that looks like this:

Just click the bright red block button at the bottom, confirm your choice, and you can peacefully go about your life.

Blocking someone from interacting with a side blog is slightly more complicated. You're going to need to be on a desktop to follow this tutorial.

On the left hand side of the screen, you should see a bunch of options like this

You're going to want to click the drop down menu for "Account".

It's going to look like this. Click on whatever side blog you wish to block this blog for.

There will be a menu on the right hand side of the screen like so. You are going to want to click the "Blog settings" button at the bottom of the menu.

From here, you are going to scroll all the way down to the bottom of your blog setting. You'll see a bunch of stuff, ignore them, they're irrelevant to blocking. You will want to click the pencil button beside the pixelated pfps of blogs you have blocked.

From here the list of blogs you have blocked will drop down and open like so

You'll want to type the name of the blog you wish to block in the box at the top, like this.

Simply click the block button

and ✨VOILA ✨! Blocked!

Now you never have to see those pesty Different Opinions™ ever again! Though it may be a good idea to remember the usernames of the people you block for this reason, in case in the future you mature enough to be capable of civil, critical discussion with people who don't agree with you. Or don't! That's no skin off either of our backs :)

This tool is also quite helpful when someone posts art, fanfics, head canons, or whatever else you may not like. In fact, it is encouraged that you use the block button instead of harassing others, making call out posts, defaming others, or letting something that frustrates you linger in your head!

You should always use the block button when you see something that is triggering to you or puts you in distress. This alongside using the filtering system that tumblr has can keep you much safer. You can do your own part to help others by remembering to never censor words you use on tumblr.com and instead typing the entire word with no euphemisms. This will prevent your post from winding up on the dash/search for someone who has those subjects/words/tags filtered out.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk, and godspeed.

[enchantedflameandflower]

Glimmer 26/? Billy Butcher fic

Thank you so so so much for still reading ♥ Please leave a comment if you're able!

Tag List: @2dead2function @secretdreamlandmentality

Billy Butcher Masterlist

_____

Chapter 26

Addison let out a heavy sigh as she fumbled to get her key in her apartment door. She finally managed to slide it in, shuffling into her loft warily and pushing the door shut behind her. She felt like she barely had the energy to do even that. She rubbed at her forehead then let her arms fell to her sides and she dropped her bag to the hardwood floor without a second thought.

"Fuck," she groaned under her breath, glancing toward her bathroom. A hot shower was desperately needed but there was no way she could manage it.

Addison slumped to sit on her bed, pulling off her boots, then her jacket and shirt, her mind losing focus completely.

Suddenly the rising sun glinted off a nearby high-rise and through the window, slanting across her face and it broke her out of her stupor. She had no idea how long she'd even been sitting there. Sighing again, she managed to stand and find a loose tank top and some shorts to change in to and then she fell back into bed, sound asleep within moments.

When she woke again it was dark and she was barely conscious even as she got up for a drink of water and headed to her bathroom after. She forced herself to take a shower but as she finished she felt even more exhausted than she had when she'd come home. She pulled the same tank top and shorts on and climbed back into bed. Part of her wished Billy was there to hold her but she was asleep again before she could even really linger on the thought.

Addison didn't wake when the sun rose and began to set again.

She didn't wake at the sound of soft footfalls outside her door.

And she didn't wake when her loft started to fill with gas.

_____

Butcher cursed out loud as he called Addison's phone then cursed again as it went straight to voicemail once more. The sound of her voice on the message made his heart clench with desperation and anguish.

He hung up and called MM next.

"How the fuck would I know where she is, Butcher?" MM answered angrily. "What the fuck is wrong with you, man?"

"Addi ain't answering her fuckin' phone and I wanna know what the bleedin' hell is goin' on," he growled back.

"Listen, Butcher, you need to get it together man. I told you she would be pissed as hell. She probably blocked your ass."

Billy rubbed his hand over his jaw before his shoulders slumped and he dropped his chin. "No," he shook his head and a new feeling of cold dread washed over him. How he wished that were the case. "I know that ain't it, MM. She gave me her word. Her phone's always charged. If she were going to block me she woulda just said so. Somethin's gone south."

"Fucking hell man…" MM gave a heavy sigh. "Fine. I'll meet you at her place but it's only to keep her from killing you."

MM was waiting outside Addi's apartment building when Billy pulled up and another swell of dread and guilt rushed through him. He knew then that MM cared more about them then Billy ever would have guessed to have gotten to her place so quickly.

When Butcher met him on the sidewalk, his friend must've seen something in his eyes, because he nodded, serious now, before he finally spoke. "We'll find her, Butcher. I promise. She'll be okay."

Billy's phone rang though before they even got to the elevator and his hand trembled when he saw it was Mallory.

"Yeah," he answered gruffly.

"William. They have her address. Her apartment number."

His heart stopped dead. "I'm here now. I'll call ya back."

He would fucking kill anyone that even thought of getting near her but in the back of his mind he knew it was already too late.

MM read the expression on his face and together they rushed to her. The door was just barely ajar and Butcher swore as he shoved it open, pulling his gun out. Remnants of the gas still lingered in the air, and both him and MM pulled their shirts up over their mouth and nose to help block it out.

Her blankets were strewn across the floor and he could see even from the doorway Addison wasn't in the bathroom or on the balcony. It felt like his heart was racing and stuttering to a stop all at once and he felt sick with grief. If anything… if she…

"Stay here and cover me," MM said. It would be no good to have them both go into the apartment in case there was enough of the chemical left in the air to knock them out. Billy kept one eye on the hallway and one on MM, but after a moment MM shook his head. No Addison and not a clue to who had taken her.

Back in the hallway, MM called Mallory to let her know what happened. She told them to come in to her office and ordered a team to take their place, to search for any more evidence and check the security tapes.

Billy felt like he was in a fog. He would slaughter everyone in this city if that's what it took to get her back, and if she was already gone he'd do it anyway.

But then MM laid a hand on his shoulder and Butcher forced himself to take a breath as he met his friend's gaze. That wasn't what Addison would want. He had to hold himself together for her, if for nothing else. At least he would fucking try. For now.

They sat in a room at the CIA office downtown for what felt like hours, combing through every shred of information they had. Mallory wouldn't let Billy near the guy they brought in the night before. Probably for the better because he felt like he could rip the cunt apart with his bare hands. But he truly didn't seem to know anymore anyway.

A rage unlike any he'd felt in a long time was starting to bubble up inside of him and Billy felt like he was going to fucking explode. "Fucking hell," he growled, standing as he finished reading the same notes for the third time and he sent his chair flying across the room to crash into the wall. MM didn't even flinch, but he did look up.

"I've gotta get out of this fuckin' building, MM. I need to be lookin' for her."

"Butcher - " MM stood but just then the door opened and Mallory came in. Billy half expected her to call him out for the chair, but her face was ashen, her eyes wide.

"We received a text on Andrews' phone. It's a link. I think it's a live feed..." she jerked her head down the hall.

They followed her to another room with screens plastered over the wall, and Grace nodded her head at a technician, who started typing then glanced up to the big screen in the middle.

It was dark at first, hard to make anything out. "What the holy fuck is this?" Butcher snarled.

Grace started to speak but was cut off when a dim light finally flicked on in the picture of the video feed, pointed to the middle of the room. Addison was tied with her hands above her head, hanging from the ceiling and slumped over, barely coherent, barely able to stand, ragged, dirty and bruised.

"Get a location on this feed!" Mallory barked. Butcher stepped closer as if he would be able to see more. Then a figure appeared just barely in frame, still swathed in darkness with a low dark laugh to match.

He came closer to Addison, closer to the light. He was thin, tall, wearing a black suit and a full black ski mask over his face. He lifted his hand and the light glinted off the shiny metal of a knife. He put the tip under her chin, lifting it so she was facing the camera.

She moaned, trying to open her eyes and the man laughed again, then trailed the tip of the knife down over the flat of her chest, a thin line of red appearing in its wake. "This is gonna be fun," he laughed again.

Butcher exploded, spinning around and roaring to Mallory, MM, the entire room. "If anything - ANYTHING happens to her I fucking swear I will BURN this entire fucking city to the ground!"

_____

Chapter 27

If you have time to let me know your thoughts or even the tiniest comment it would make my whole year!

If you have any asks for Billy and Addision, anything for any time period I would LOVE that! Let me know!

[waltwhitmansbeard]

Critter Genfic Bingo: Mystery

VETH.

The woman in question jumps, the disembodied yet familiar voice in her head startling her so badly she drops the wine glass she's holding.

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY. I THINK FJORD IS BEING MIND-CONTROLLED. WE NEED TO INVESTIGATE IMMEDIATELY. HOW FAST CAN YOU GET HERE?

There's silence, but Veth waits.

Tell Yeza hi!

There it is.

Veth has just finished her return message—I'll be there in fifteen. Assemble all your evidence; we're gonna crack the case!—when Yeza pops his head into the kitchen. "Are you okay? It sounds like something broke in here."

She looks down at the shattered wine glass. "Jester," she offers as an explanation, before quickly conjuring an unseen servant to clean up the mess. Once that's taken care of, she darts around the Brenatto house, packing her bag with whatever accoutrements might be needed for freeing Fjord of the alleged mind control he's under.

Yeza, patient, understanding Yeza, merely leans against the door frame and says, "Well, I guess I'll get Luc from school."

"You don't mind?"

"I mean, this seems like an emergency."

Veth pauses. "Well, this is Jester we're talking about, so there's a...sixty-two percent chance it's not."

"Better not take the risk." Yeza snags her by the waist as she tries to dart past and kisses her. "Go solve the mystery, detective."

Veth grins. "She says hi, by the way."

"Tell her I want you back in one piece."

"The only one who gets to split me in two is you." She slaps his ass, and then she's off and out the door toward Jester and Fjord's.

.

Jester has chewed all of her fingernails to the quick by the time Veth arrives. "Finally!" She doesn't wait for pleasantries, just drags her friend by the arm to the back of the tiny house that she and Fjord have claimed as their home when they're not on the high seas. There's a window overlooking the postage stamp of a back garden, where Fjord is trimming a hedge—or rather, he's opening and closing a pair of hedge clippers in the same spot, over and and over and over, even though there are no longer any branches to cut.

"See?" She gestures emphatically toward the window. "He's being weird!"

Veth frowns. "He's always weird, Jester. Remember that time he ate a fucking ball?"

"This is different. He's been…distracted all week. Erratic. Two days ago, he put all the clean towels in the icebox. And he keeps muttering under his breath." She takes a deep breath. "What if it's Uk'otoa?"

"Uk'otoa," Veth whispers obligatorily, before shrugging. "I doubt it, because we killed him. Listen, you've had a good run. But so much time on the sea is enough to drive anyone crazy, and he's long gone." Veth pats her arm in sympathy.

Jester frowns. Veth isn't taking her seriously. "I am telling you, I know him, something is—"

She's cut off by a strangled shout from outside, and they both whip their heads to stare outside. Jester's stomach sinks as she watches two figures in head-to-toe black and masked, one tall and broad and one shorter and slimmer, wrap their arms around Fjord from both sides. The smaller one claps a hand over his mouth as the larger one pins his arms together, and the two start to drag him away, not deterred by his thrashing.

"FJORD!" Jester spins around and bolts for the front door. She feels so foolish; Fjord told her that this place was a fire hazard, with only the one exit, and now it might mean she doesn't get the chance to tell him he was right.

"Holy shit!" Veth is on her heels, but Jester is taller, faster; she whips open the door and runs along the side of the house. She stumbles into the back garden, but it's empty, the clippers half-sticking out of the hedge.

"Oh no, FJORD!" Jester's heart is pounding in her ears. She whips her head around, but there's no sign of him or his attackers anywhere.

Behind her, Veth pants, "Where are they? We can take 'em!"

Jester can barely think. Someone took Fjord. And because he's been so cagey these past few days, she doesn't know who or why. She drops to her knees, the panic setting in.

"Hey, Jes, we'll find him." Veth squeezes her shoulder. "No mystery that you and I can't…hang on."

Jester watches her scurry over to where Fjord had been standing and crouch down to rifle in the dirt. "Look at this!"

A sharp spike of hope pierces Jester's chest. She scrambles over. "What is it?"

Veth's holding up a small, shiny piece of sea glass, foam green and about the size of Veth's fingernail. It glints in the sunlight. Jester frowns. "It's sea glass, Veth. We're by the ocean. The garden must be full of it."

"No look!” Veth turns it, and Jester can see now that the piece of glass is perfectly smooth, each of its edges even and carefully beveled. “This sea glass was cut by a jeweler.”

Jester frowns. She’s right, but she hardly sees how that’s relevant. “How does that help us find who kidnapped my boyfriend?”

“One of the campers at Wilde Out! has a parent who does this kind of work with sea glass. They’re right here in Nicodranas!”

Jester’s starting to pick up what Veth’s putting down. “Maybe one of the attackers dropped it! Maybe the jeweler knows who it belongs to!”

Veth grins from ear to ear. “Brenatto and Lavorre are on the case!”

“Yeah!” Jester is now also grinning, until she remembers that Fjord was violently kidnapped not two minutes ago. She schools her expression into something more somber. “Let’s go get my fucking boyfriend.”

.

The jeweler is a little hole-in-the-wall place on the first floor of an apartment block. Jester presses her face up against the glass of the door, right over the Heflin Fine Jewelry written in gilded script. The store is dark inside, which makes asking the proprietor for help difficult.

“Maybe they live upstairs?” Jester offers hopefully, stepping back from the door.

Veth takes the opportunity to whip her lockpicking kit out of her bag. “I’ve got this.” After about a minute of grunting and low cursing, the door to the jeweler’s swings wide open. Jester looks up and down the street, but there are no Zhelezo around, and no one seems to notice the tiefling and the halfing breaking into a shop in broad daylight.

They slip inside and close the door. “Okay, what are we supposed to do now?” Jester whispers. “There’s no one here!”

“Then why are you whispering?”

Oh. Right. In her normal voice, Jester says, “Maybe there are papers in the office? Some kind of purchase records?”

“Right.” Veth leads the way toward the door that they presume to be the office, and after picking that lock, they’re inside. There are rows and rows of filing cabinets, and Jester groans. “This is going to take forever.”

They each take a filing cabinet and start digging. Jester learns quickly that the easy solution she’d been hoping for, a picture of the piece of sea glass right next to the name of its purchaser, was a pipe dream. Apparently this jeweler does a lot of work with sea glass, and there’s no telling which of the hundreds of rings, bracelets, necklaces, or watches the piece they found could have come from. After about half an hour, Jester throws herself into the office chair with a frustrated groan. “This is useless! We need to try something else.”

Veth slams shut the drawer she’d been rifling through, and the movement causes a gust of wind to shuffle the papers on the desk. One such scrap drifts off the desk and onto Jester’s lap. She picks it up and reads out loud, “Fifty gold to glass pirates at wharf. Stone’s Throw won’t deliver under threats.” She gasps and leaps up out of the chair. “Stone’s Throw! That’s Fjord’s company!”

“Let me see!” Veth snatches the paper from Jester and reads it again. “So…Fjord worked with the jeweler?”

“Or the company did! Glass pirates…” Jester begins to pace. “Maybe this sea glass is valuable. Maybe Stone’s Throw has been shipping it for the jeweler, and maybe these pirates want a cut of the action. Maybe that’s why they took Fjord!”

Veth snaps her fingers. “We’re cracking the case!”

“We’re cracking the case!”

“To the wharf!”

“To the wharf!”

.

The Restless Wharf is restless indeed. There are dozens, hundreds of people, sailors and dock workers and entertainers and Zhelezo and customs agents, all intermingling in a dance that, frankly, smells really, really bad. Jester has a hard time imagining pirates getting away with much with this many eyes and ears around, but then, she knows well enough by now how sneaky pirates can be.

Veth seems to be on her same wavelength. “We could be looking for anyone. Everyone looks suspicious here.”

“You think that because they work on boats.”

“Never trust a sailor!”

Jester frowns. “Well, my sailor was taken, and someone here knows something about it.”

They start to skirt around the edges of the chaos, catching what scraps of conversation they can. It’s so loud, and the talk Jester hears is mostly of shipping dates and locations. It’s all becoming overwhelming, until Veth tugs hard on her sleeve. “Jessie! Look!”

Jester follows her pointing finger until she sees a pair of dock workers half-hidden beneath an awning. They’re shrouded in shadow, but Jester can just tell that they’re up to no good. Still, she has no idea if they know anything.

“They’re ne’er-do-wells,” Veth whispers dramatically. “I can feel it.”

She’s getting desperate, so Jester casts a furtive glance around to make sure she’s not being watched before going invisible. She scurries over to the dock workers, and she just manages to make out their low conversation—“damned green menace wouldn’t stop fighting, heard his tusks pack a nasty punch”—before the invisibility ends and she’s grabbing one of the dock workers, one with shaggy, dirty red hair, by the shirtfront and slamming him against the wall. “TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!”

“Holy shit, Jester!” Veth scurries over, snapping, “Mind your business!” to the gawkers around.

The other dock worker, with dark skin and pale eyes, barks, “Hey, crazy lady, what do you think you’re—”

“Shut it!” She slams the guy she’s holding against the wall again. “The green menace! Where is he?”

The redheaded dock worker’s eyes are wide. “Fucking hell, where did you come from?”

Jester hovers her face an inch away from his. He smells like fish and sweat and, weirdly, ink? “From your worst nightmare. Tell me where he is, now.”

The other one reaches for something behind his back, but Veth yanks a dagger from her bag and aims it straight for his balls. “Stay still or shore leave is gonna be a lot less fun going forward.”

“Fuck, they don’t pay me enough for this.” The redhead looks around briefly before muttering, “They took him to a cave along the eastern shore. Something about gold and glass, I don’t know, I was just keepin’ an eye out for the Zhelezo. Contract work, am I right?”

Jester releases him and steps back. “A cave along the eastern shore?”

He shrugs. “They use it to house people they want to smuggle out of Nicodranas. It’s still light out, so he should still be there.”

“See, was that hard?” She points a finger at one, then the other. “Don’t follow us!” Then she spins around and marches off to the east.

“Jester, wait!” Jester knows that’s she’s going too fast for Veth to keep up for long, but she’s so close to getting Fjord back she can taste it like salt in the air. “We should get back-up!”

“Back-up?” Jester frowns down at her. “Why? We know where he is, and they won’t be smuggling him until later.”

“Yeah, according to those two dumbasses. What if they’re wrong? What if it’s a trap?”

“A trap for me?” Jester thinks about it for a moment. “But this has nothing to do with me. Fjord didn’t even tell me there were pirates after him.”

“A trap for someone. Jester, it’s a cave. By the ocean. Anything can happen in there!”

They’re almost at the end of the docks now, the rocky beaches stretching out ahead. Jester comes to a stop, puts her hands on her hips. “If you want to go get help, go get help. I’m going to get Fjord.” And then she starts running.

As she goes, she doesn’t hear any footsteps behind her over the crashing of waves, so she assumes that Veth did in fact go get help. That’s fine. She’ll save Fjord on her own. She runs along the beach, slipping and tripping through the sand and rocks, until she catches it around the curve of the shoreline: the slim opening of a cave, maybe only a head or two taller than she is. She slows, trying to catch her breath, and peeks inside. It’s dark and narrow and very scary. She grips the symbol around her neck and whispers, “Traveler, guide me,” before stepping inside.

The cave is damp and cold. Soon, she’s out of the range of the sunlight from the cave entrance, so she digs around in her pocket until she finds a paintbrush she doesn’t remember putting in there. She casts daylight on it, illuminating the cave with warm, bright light. She blinks rapidly, her eyes slow to adjust to the light, but a muffled sound reaches her ears from deeper in the cave.

Fjord.

"I'm coming!" She stumbles her way forward, and finally, when she can see without squinting, a shape emerges on the cave floor: Fjord, hands and feet bound, a gag in his mouth, a bruise blooming spectacularly over one eye. "FJORD!"

Jester crashes to her knees beside him, paintbrush scattering aside, heart pounding as she yanks the gag from his mouth. "Thanks, Jessie," he pants. "I knew I could could on you."

And yes, her hands may be shaking as she works at the knot tying his hands and feet together, but she still preens, just a little. "I saw them take you! It was really scary, but it's okay! We'll get out of here." The rope falls to the rocky floor. "Come on!" She grabs Fjord's hand and tugs him up to his feet.

"Jessie, wait." Fjord tugs his hand from her grasp.

"Fjord, they could come back at any minute! We have to go!"

"They took something from me." He starts to root around in his pocket.

"What is it?"

"My last name. Can I have yours?"

Jester blinks at him in confusion, and before she can have a single coherent thought, Fjord is on his knees, a small, velvet box in his hand. He opens it, his bruised face blushing furiously, and it isn't until she sees the ring, a silver band worked around gorgeous, glinting shards of sea glass, that it hits her.

Her scream echoes, magnified by a thousand, and Fjord winces. "I'm gonna take that as a sign to continue." He clears his throat. "I've been a bastard and a sailor and a hero and a pirate and a god's soldier, but the most important thing I've ever been is someone who gets to love the most lovable person in the world. And if it's alright with you, I'd like to keep doing that...well, forever. Jester Lavorre, will you marry me?"

In all of her years of chaos and trickery, Jester has never been so taken aback by someone else's scheming. All of this, the kidnapping and searching and panicking and running—this was a proposal? Part of her wants to dash his head against the cave wall for letting her think that he was taken by pirates who wanted to kill him.

But...he's looking up at her, his big eyes shining and so very sweet, and the ring really is so beautiful, and how well he knows her to know that her favorite thing is a good mystery to solve. Oh, she's defenseless against him, the most charismatic captain on the high seas. "Okay," she squeaks out, wiping at her eyes, which are obviously wet from the ocean. "Yeah, that sounds good."

Fjord grins like he's just been set loose in the biggest candy shop on the continent. "Really?"

She nods vigorously, and then launches herself at him, throwing her arms around his neck. "I can't believe it!" she sobs. "I can't believe how mad I am at you, and I can't believe we're getting married!"

Fjord laughs. From the direction of the mouth of the cave, hoots and hollers and applause draw Jester's attention away from Fjord. All of a sudden, four globules of light dance along the path, and all of their friends are there, waving and cheering. "What..."

Fjord stands them both up and steers her toward them. "You don't think I did this alone, did you?"

"I got to punch him in the face!" Beau announces, clearly ecstatic.

Caduceus grips his staff. "And I healed him up a bit when she went way too far."

Yasha and Kingsley are wearing all-black clothes, and the latter dangles a black mask in the air. "Tip your local kidnappers."

Jester looks to Caleb and Essek, who, she now notices, are wearing the exact same clothing as the dock workers she'd interrogating not ten minutes ago. Her jaw drops. "Even you, Essek?"

He shrugs. "Subterfuge is my specialty."

Veth rubs her hands together conspiratorially. "I love it when a plan comes together. Congratulations, Fjord: this one's almost as good as Fluffernutter."

Fjord ducks his head in a bow. Jester squeezes his arm. "I can't believe you did all of this for me."

"An over-the-top woman deserves an over-the-top proposal. Which reminds me..." He takes the ring out of the box, which goes back into his pocket. "May I?"

She holds her hand out, and the ring slips perfectly onto her finger. She extends her arm so it catches the sunlight peaking into the cave. "It's beautiful," she breathes.

"Just like you." And Fjord kisses her, and Jester has never been happier in her entire life.

[lifelessfan]

"Don't utter his name"

it's not exactly what was in the transcription of the interrogation but the basic same idea anyway so it's fine. Dall gets very protective. Ooc a bit I think

270-82014...it was him, one of our very own. But how did we find his name? Hoxton sits behind us, an unreadable expression but one can only assume he was feeling a little happy seeing Houston's name in the police database.

Nathan wasn't doing so good tho, staring down the police report and seeing his name. Shade sits by the computer, a repeat screen and looking through more of his reports on another monitor, taking Nathan's silence as not a good sign, figuring she should get to work before he burns up.

Dallas finally snaps out of it, straightening up, thinking about what should be their next steps, the reports wrote down a whole host of legal issues, and while never getting caught, he can only assume how many years he would be behind bars. Hoxton was stuck for 2, only a couple when compared to the papers saying "life sentence", and that was comparatively at the start of their small gangs story. But Houston? He didn't want to even think about it, not now, he just couldn't

He can't really stop himself, turning around and heading out from the safehouse, voice just loud enough to hear in the room, but not a decibel higher

-I need a smoke

The safe house was silent, the previous chatter about Clover and the messages going quiet as the prisoner was revealed, Dall storming out not a surprise though still painful nonetheless.

He had done a lot for the team, the first addition, the quiet, stealthy, mechanic, they practically took him for granted through the years

While some liked him less than others, they mostly still mutually agreed prison was going too harsh. Remembering what he was like, he wouldn't survive like Hoxton, not 2 years, not with anything less than a burn

Nathan stood outside, he needed a breather. The sudden stress and pressure increased 3 fold as he stared at the floor, eyes unfocused. He had wanted to reconnect with him for ages, just never had the guts. Left him once, what's the harm in leaving him again? Now thinking back it was a lot of harm, no security, his dreams a tightrope that seemed to have failed.

Dall wasn't good with emotions, most of the time only talking to Bain, keeping his emotions covered unless it was with specific personnel and Shade just...wasn't there yet, the team was still a team, not people he could open to too easily.

Finally dropping the smoke, mind set on one thing, he needed a second to sit with the news, he needed to break something, steal, come to terms, maybe finally realise just how important Houston was

-anyone call any jobs in? We need information, leads.

-I asked around for anyone with access to the Houston files since they were under different handlers, said we needed to raid the newly opened jewellery street before he plans to help us

The stress was evident in his voice, he needed a distraction, something to help him calm down

-how do you know he's safe?

-I'll have backup check his tracks and records, worst case we will be able to take the haul for ourselves.

-yes, take it

It was something. shade had offered the same prospect multiple times, taking up a job and backtracking if the contact couldn't be trusted. While they didn't like to operate like that any more after Hector had proved himself to be a good manipulator even if they had slipped through more than once due to corrupt cops, at this point Dallas would be asking for anything. He needed to see him again, needed something to work with

-Dallas? You sure. You know we don't do this any more. If-

-we need to take the risk. And we take extra precautions this time. Common, let's go

He he stuff to do, finalising his points and forcing the others to cooperate. Heading out to make a couple of calls to the others on the small-time thievery trips, they were going to be taking the next couple of days a little more seriously

<time skip>

Address, date and time. All details were supplied and agreed on. Final gathered items and they were heading out. Everyone of course had their reactions to the situation, Joy wondering just why Dallas was making such an exception, only getting caught up on the drive and holding her tongue to make up for the mass of questions. Wolf was just happy to get another job, of course, he still held quiet about why, still knowing the implications and opting to stay light for everyone's sake

Pearl was like Joy, except she was quieter about the questions, not willing to get in the middle of the stressed team, following along and listening only to be caught off guard having not followed the reveal like Hoxton. catching wind of a previous teammate heading to possible trial and prison, she had taken a second to take a breather for the possible implications

Hoxton and Chains were left with Shade, both choosing to stay out of the line of fire and instead opting to secure the contract, heading out for information instead of the jewles

The mission while loud, still is quiet when looking at coms. Even split amongst multiple stores and each with different funded security protocols, they all made due with Shade and her input for when and where, only really communicating for help.

Once the van was called, everyone had hauled all the bags they could, loud within the gunfire and running, gems and metals shaking in their bags. Familiar deadweight as each throw what they can in the back, a couple of words for those who finished quicker and running to help pick up other bags left.

Ammo left by the magazines in the rush, health bags slowly burnt away by wandering cloakers. it's not a sloppy job, but still one with enough faults to have calls for hand-on-hand help. A hefty pull by the hand to pull Joy in, blood down her leg, doors closed quickly and towels getting wrapped just as the car is thrown into gear and pulls out

Heavy breathing, and stuffy whines as the wound is attempted simple treatment by Dallas and Pearl. Better medical help once they were back at base but that wasn't for another 30min.

Hoxton and Chains were out of base all the same, looking for answers and any reason to doubt the possible trade. Shade helped where she could with the trackdown, people to talk through both logically and by bruit force.

While not something they were used to doing after learning their lesson the first time, they had to protect what was theirs, they had to take precautions they usually wouldn't bother with.

- he's clean, we had a look and he's worked with a lot of trusted people

Finally coming back just in time to meet up with the van, they all clean up. Helping Joy once she's brought into safety, cleaned blood tracks and comfortably placed on the couch. Chains comforts and works on the wound by reflex as he sits by her, both Joy and Chains still listen, following along with the conversation happening by Shade as they finalise and double check the information

- you have any more information on the insider?

- not much else of relevance, works within the prison Houston is being kept at, has access and is willing to offer the files

-then let's go through with the deal, the sooner we know what we are working with, the earlier we can make a plan

The finality of the statement, a huff in his words as he heads off, the team splitting up to head to their small jobs, Chains and an extra set of hands or looking for more materials to work with. They were getting close

<time skip>

it was like jumping through hoops, hiding their names and faces to drop the payment and once it all finally dose get through checks and into the right hands, everyone waited, they would be getting their rewards soon.

A ping on the computer and Shades sits up, hands on the keyboard and looking through the message, finding not only the files they had been promised, but an additional file that had been added

-*You were quick with the job, as a thank you, I had happened to walk into an interrogation of the person you had been requesting information on. I've added the audio I caught*

The files were duplicated and analysed seppretly, the audio opened once everything else was analysed. The basic gist of the situation and convictions was understood, and at this point they would take any more information they could get there hands on, including audio, as long as it wasn't eddited. They had their suspicions

North- Alright, Mr.Steele. You need anything, can I get you some water? Why don't you tell me why you're here?

The screen dark as the progression bar ticks the seconds of the audio, shuffling, doors opening and closing, handcuffs, everyone's ears strained, heart heavy, Houston's voice was muddy in all their minds, just bare memories

His voice is gruff, heavy, clearly not here much by choice and willing to make the most of the moment. A smile in his voice

Houston- Officer, I think there's been a mistake. What...exactly am I getting accused of? And I believe asked you to contact my lawyer.

Pearl stands close by, listening, a small smile from finally hearing the voice of someone they all seemed to stress over, Dallas the most of course.

Even with the harsh microphone it was caught on, his voice echoes in all their minds, familiar, not...exact, but not too far.

Houston- Grand larceny?...Wait, tax evasion?? You got the wrong guy, Officer North. I'm inno... This wasn't me

North- We have enough evidence to put you away for a long time. Grand larceny... fraud...and tax evasion. Those are just the ones that make good headlines. It is quite the list, don't you think?

Innocent? Of course, he wasn't innocent...his pause, the refusal to lie that he was a law-abiding citizen and just respond with the same comment that it 'wasn't him'? Maybe that wasn't a lie either

Houston- Witnesses?? I look like a lot of people. I can't answer for what these "Witnesses" say they saw but it wasn't me. You know how unreliable eyewitnesses can be.

North- Not you, huh? Explain this. We've got witnesses who saw you as the last person on the scene of the crime last week.

Thinking about it, it made sense, the gang were rougher around the edges, his calmer voice didn't mirror the same calm in the public eye. Dallas couldn't help a small scoff in his smile, the same Houston he was familiar with

It was weird, Houston wasn't much in terms of 'confident' years ago, not a complete pushover but not nearly this tough.

Houston- How are you doing on that lawyer by the way?

North- And what about the security footage? Sure looks a lot like you.

Houston- Really? security footage? Crazy what AI can do these days and you still can't get security footage over 480p anyway. I don't know what you're fishing for here, or if you're just setting me up, but I've been living clean for the past.... 5 years, at least.

North- A setup, huh? It's always a setup isn't it. You expect me to believe that there's some conspiracy against you? Even with... all this evidence?

Houston- That's exactly what I'm telling you.

North- ...And the tax evasion? We've got your financial records. You're deep in the red, Steele.

Houston-  I'd have to see those numbers myself North. But, I pay my taxes, every cent. If there's been a mistake, I'll make sure to sort it out together with my accountant and the IRS.

Houston- Confess? to crimes I didn't commit? Not gonna happen. I think we're done here.

North- You're full of it, Steele. This case is a formality, we've got video, papers, witnesses. In all my years I've barely seen anyone this royally fucked. Just confess, make it easier for us both, I'll even see if I can get you a good deal for cooperating and saving the state some money. What do you say?

Even Hoxton could listen and even quietly admire, his progression and even the now mirroring situation of jail with hands around their throats, a clutch tight, it was...A little admirable.

It did seem like a lost cause, the case file looked all formal, the clear backing up of those papers, witnesses, videos, there was no room to argue and it was a criminal word against the police and justice seekers. While it seemed useless, Houston still stood his ground.

North-  Have it your way, it's not like the trial's gonna drag anyway Franklin

A pause. He said what?

Houston- Good luck with that. I'll be here, waiting for that lawyer you're supposed to be calling. And I'll take you up on that bottle of water while you're up, thanks.

this was worse than the new accusations, worse to dismiss and trust the paper and videos that yes, can be manipulated. the bite as he said it, the spite and almost small clear hint of victory either way when he said his name. He could only lower his voice so much

A cold and hot flush, the moment of confidence, the admiration that maybe he could have some way out, Nathan couldn't keep his pain down much longer.

- Keep his name out your mouth

A little more shuffling, a closing recording of the case number and participants cutting off as the contact finally leaves, takes the recording before seemingly bolting back to work

Nathan stands by the desk, knuckles against the wood and feeling his nails dig into his palm.

His teeth grit hard, only he had called his first name, he didn't care what happened out of his range of hearing and now hearing it all over again, the pain in his chest, shoulders, muscles strained now and now body temperature unbalanced under his jacket

Houston had said, he didn't like using his first name at all, kept it quiet and out of courtesy, no one went much out of their way to find something they kept hidden.

...

"Keep his name out of your mouth"

[nanjokei]

i think the spread of character ai usage (and ai art generation usage also) is definitely an issue with people wanting instant gratification which actual rp usually is just not sustainably built for unless you're doing chat rp, even then your friends aren't awake 24/7 waiting at beck and call to entertain you. it's not literally entitlement, but it 100% stems from entitlement to be entertained constantly and passively instead of actually going out and finding something to do.

god this sounds like such boomer shit but the creation of endless scrolling like on tiktok with specifically tailored algorithms has made people so PASSIVE. ai can never come close to human creators but if people, especially the younger generation, are getting too cozy with choosing it over seeking out other human beings (whether it be indirectly via consuming fanmade work or directly via actual collaborative stuff like online roleplay), then how different is it from the ai "winning"? i don't think any of the excuses are valid. it's a subpar product in every way. it's almost never im character, it breaks if you propose anything too left field, and it's ultimately empty wish fulfilment and i have no idea how anyone past the age of 16 AT BEST gets any gratification from it. is it just the spread of a lack of reading comprehension? OPEN THE SCHOOLS!!

i do think it's an issue of people not being comfortable with boredom, always needing instant gratification, not wanting to sit down and hone a craft, or give the people who hone a craft themselves the time of day because they can't crank out """content""" for you 24/7. in a way, i'm thinking right now, when i'm bored i just channel surf on tv even if i don't do it as much anymore. but most people don't have tv anymore (personally we pirate iptv so LOL). i don't blame it on that necessarily, but i think with the rise of streaming, you just sit there on a media library staring at a bunch of thumbnails and posters, having to make a decision on how to invest your time. in this case, i get why people are so passive. tiktok is easier, character ai is easier. because i never ended up watching anything whenever i opened netflix (when we had it years ago). one could argue that watching tv is passive, but there's still a choice. you check the tv guide or google it and you know a certain show is on tv a certain channel at a certain time so you keep that in mind. what do you do in the meanwhile? i remember when that was an actual routine for me. i'd be slacking and not doing my homework, so maybe i'd draw a bit, maybe i play on my ds for a while, maybe i go make myself a snack or bake some pastries if i have all day, maybe i continue a book or even surf the web a bit.

the instinct of "aight, im gonna do something else on my own while i wait" is kind of dying. yes i'm on my phone! the difference is my use case. these days i'm not on social media aside from here so i don't use it as much aside from talking to friends on messaging clients and playing games (rarely tho). i say this as someone who stares at the ceiling not doing anything for a good bit each day, but at least i feel like i still have retained some ability to sometimes go, ok time to learn about a new hobby! i don't have to even pick it up. just entertaining it is gratifying on its own. i'm not a writer, but sometimes i'll write a little bit for fun then go "yeah i get why i don't jive with this". lately, i've been interested in competitive pokemon (with not much interest before) because i've been replaying platinum. i research a bit, watch videos, i even got a little brave and tested some sample teams on showdown. it was a fun time killer! i might keep doing it. i might even do it later today. i started reading pokespe too to scratch the pokemon itch too. and it's not like i don't suffer from crazy hard executive dysfunction but hey, this is a product of my effort. lately i've been thinking i wanna pick a character in guilty gear and learn at least one combo! trying new things is fun!!!

i'm sure this post sounds self important, self impressed, self absorbed (c-c-c-combo breaker) and boomer ish as fuck but honestly i don't care anymore. if someone who struggles with simple tasks on the daily like me can find shit to do that isn't just instantly caving to endless scrolling and resorting to chatting up an AI then i'm sure most people can too. it is so much more gratifying actively seeking out fun than to be passive about it.

[psychics4unet]

Hii, I was hoping I could get a reading with the angels 😇. I was wondering if I'll get out of the current circumstances I'm in soon. Ty again for all the free readings you do.

Free Psychic Reading – Message From The Angels! 😇✨

The angels are here, surrounding you with love and reassurance. They understand the weight of your current circumstances and want you to know that this phase won’t last forever. 🌈 I’m feeling their gentle push for you to stay hopeful. They're saying that you're much closer to a breakthrough than it seems. The key right now is patience and trust, even when it feels difficult to hold on.

The angels are sending you signs that relief is on the way. They want you to keep an open heart and notice the small opportunities around you—those are stepping stones to bigger changes. 🙏 They see that you've been working hard to move forward, and while it may seem slow, you’re making progress. The energy is shifting in your favor, and you’ll soon start feeling a sense of ease and release. 🌟 Keep faith because they’re guiding you toward something better!

Got questions or need some insight into your life? I'm here to help with personal psychic readings! For just $7, you can get answers to up to 7 questions! More info at:

In case anyone else here on tumblr would like a free psychic reading (message from the angels), Click the link and follow the instructions (I answer only to those who follow the instructions, thank you):

[voraciouspangolin]

You 🫵 are an antisemite

I'm quite confident that I'm not.

But, yeah, I'll answer this ask.

I don't know if this kind of nuance is seen as a fault or a mistake in the argumentative debate format that online conversations seem to solely exist in, or whatever. But I would be doing a disservice to my own personal growth if I didn't say that, yeah, sure, maybe I am. Maybe I am antisemetic.

I sure as hell can't think of anything that I've done or said that would be antisemetic-

But what the fuck do I know? Genuinely, what Do I know about jewish issues. I'm a 17 year old white boy in a middle class family who grew up going to a french catholic school with other white catholic kids. Only when I started highschool, in a public one, did I start to see more than 3-4 black or brown people in my day to day life.

I straight up cannot name a single jewish person that I personally know. It's not like the conversation ever pops up, especially since I go to a public school- but just the fact that I don't know if any of my friends or if any of the people I see everyday are jewish goes to show, maybe jewish folks don't feel welcome, or don't feel the need to- or don't feel safe- talking to white kids like me about their jewish practice, religion, ancestry, ethnicity, or whathaveyou.

Point is- I very much could be harbouring antisemetic attitudes or behaviours, born purely out of ignorance, and born out of living in a deeply antisemetic society. Especially with me spending so much time online, where antisemetic dogwhistles and caricatures are terrifyingly common, and becoming more and more mainstream. I am completely unaware if that's the case, I can't think of anything I've done that would be antisemetic. I try my best to keep an open mind and learn about as many different kinds of perspectives and lived experiences as I can, but I can't know what I don't know.

However... to call me antisemetic, with nothing else attached to the message. Well, before I get to my main point: yeah, I get it. It's exhausting being around people who are ignorant or engaging in bigoted behaviours, it's angering. I can definitely apply my own experience with bigotry, even though what I experience isn't wholly applicable or superimposable onto the millenias-long practice of antisemetism- I can't count how many times I've gotten so angry or fed up with someone and their behaviour that I just wanted to call them transphobic and insult them and move on with my day because spending any more time debating the validity of my own existance would lead to me to blow 20 gaskets or something. I feel this way the most when the bigoted person I'm seeing seems utterly convinced and completely insistent on remaining in their point of view that they completely dismiss or react in bad faith to any attempts I make at trying to show them a different perspective.

With that said, to call me antisemetic, with a little pointing emoji, without anything else attached to the message... kind of... annoys me? I mean, it's definitely not your personal responsibility, or the responsibility of anyone, really, to educate me or anything. You don't owe me anything like that.

But I just... cmon, man, give me something to work with. If I'm genuinely antisemetic, in spite of my confidence that I'm not, then I want to know. Is it something I reblogged? Something I personally said? What makes me antisemetic?

Without additional information, sending me this ask serves only to call me as antisemetic. Like the word "antisemite" is a brand that scars one's flesh forever. But... it doesn't have to be. If I am antisemetic, I sure as hell don't want to be. I want to change. I will never stop growing as a person. I will never stop encountering blind spots in my own perspective, areas where my knowledge doesn't consider certain things solely because I've been privileged enough to never have to think about those things.

I don't want to stop changing.

Even though I'm so far removed from judaism and the jewish experience, I still... really feel for jews. I don't know how to say it without sounding like I'm rhapsodiaing about my saltine sentiments, but I care. I care about anyone who's oppressed, and even though I can't physically help everyone, just knowing or understanding is valuable to me.

[sidebaxolotl]

Genuine question how do you justify the idea that God intentionally hurts nonbelievers to "break them" into falling back onto faith? I grew up with this idea drilled into me pretty heavily and as an adult looking back I don't know how to disconnect that message from an inherent message of abuse - love me or I will break you until you do.

Not trying to be antagonistic, I'm genuine here and speaking from experience. this concept has seriously messed with me, and played a part in an internal connection between faith and punishment. Especially since many of my struggles and stressors revolve around my physical and mental health. It took me years to unlearn the idea that my panic attacks were God punishing me, or pushing me to confess something so I would turn back to Him. How can I possibly take comfort from pain in someone who inflicted that pain on me intentionally to "break" me into submission? I get that actions have consequences, but the lowest points in my life have rarely been because of my own choices. I have medical conditions that need medical treatment, and none of those conditions were triggered by poor choices. They're just a thing that exist and it sucks, but they're not my fault any more than an allergy would be my fault.

sorry if this is too much, I just genuinely don't understand your viewpoint and your page seems to be open to discussion?

Ah, yeah this is kinda why i had some hesitation about making that post because i kinda figured someone would take it this way but I wanted to vent about something that was driving me crazy so I did any way. I'll try to explain the best I can though! A couple caveats before I explain this:

1. I do not believe every instance of a nonbeliever suffering is inherently a punishment from God and i would strongly caution people from using this logic 99% of the time--we live in a fallen world and the consequence of that is pain and brokenness for everyone regardless of faith or lack there of 2. However, as believers we do have assurance from God that whatever pain or brokenness we do go through is 100% not a punishment from God. We will absolutely incur pain and brokenness in our lives but God has promised to use it for our good and His glory (Romans 8:1, Romans 8:32, Romans 8:28). And you seem like a believer to me anon, so this point is what applies to you. God is not punishing you.

So ok, for the situation with nbbestie, I'm sure this is whats happening in this specific case because I'm privy to a lot more information about her and her faith than I'm willing to divulge on here. I was discipling her before she fell away, I've been witness to the struggling and suffering on her end, she has told me very personal things about herself and we've lived life together very closely and personally.

And this whole ordeal has gone on for years. This is a very specific case where I've prayed enough and know enough from being there that I understand the situation in a very intimate way. What I am willing to divulge on here is that even though I love nbbestie with my whole heart, she is an intensely prideful and stubborn person. And someone like that has a heart that is too hard and too hearty to receive God peacefully. And believe me, He has already tried peacefully.

As I've seen suffering and and worsening of circumstances fall on all three of us, me and bbestie were able to cope and keep our heads above water--mind you the problem isn't 100% fixed but we asked God for help and he did provide exactly what was needed (+ comfort) and nothing more. Nbbestie did not receive that kind of divine help, and in fact out of the three of us she's having the worst go of it.

She has no idea what to do or who to turn to (we help her and support her as much as we can but its really not a problem than anyone is equipped to fix) and we've had conversations where she has asked me "how do you do this?" or "what do you do?" and when I tell her that I ask God for things or pray to Him about my suffering she has not listened or has directly obfuscated my point. This is not a coincidence. She is asking me for the answer (God) and deliberately not taking it when given because she does not want to submit to God and thinks she can do everything herself. The only way to get through to a prideful heart like that is to crush that pride. And that often means taking away things or affliction until the heart is broken and contrite enough to be humble. There is biblical precedent for this, like Saul of Tarsus pre-conversion. God had to physically blind him and knock him off of his horse before he was humbled enough to stop his persecution and give his life to Christ. Or even figures like Pharaoh who let his people suffer through terrible plagues before he was humbled enough by his own suffering to let the Jewish people flee Egypt. This last part is really hard to understand if you haven't fully internalized the character of God and His sovereignty but I'm going to try and explain this too because this is the most important part and the crux of this explanation:

God is good. Like He is everything good and just and holy and kind and perfect. We need him more than anything else in this world. He is the highest good that can ever be achieved. He is not like human beings with flawed and selfish motives. If you told me that any human being in your life: parent, sibling, friend, spouse etc. deliberately let you suffer so that you would have to rely on them totally i would call them crazy and abusive--these are flawed, and sinful human beings. To do something like that would require a large amount of pride and delusion on an unreal level. They aren't perfect, they dont have all the answers, they are biased, no human being could ever be the highest good in someone elses life like that.

But that isn't God. He is good and perfect. He does know all the answers, He is not biased, He always makes the right decisions. He is without flaw. He is your creator and sustainer and is thus the only thing even remotely qualified to be the highest good in your life. Doing whatever it takes to get you to see Him directly is a net benefit TO YOU. You can take some comfort in suffering and affliction particularly as a believer because God cares enough to use it to help you get closer to Him and His perfect love and care rather than let you continue in ignorance unafflicted.

[liminalmemories21]

I sent you ask a while back which you didn't want to answer at the time because spoilers. Maybe you just don't want to answer it, which is obviously fine, but just in case you forgot about it, I'll ask again. I reread the entire Knave series after you posted the latest installment and reading it all in one day, it kind of jumped out at me that Carlos is a really passive character in the series. TK is the one solving the mysteries, taking on the bad guys, kicking ass. Carlos just mostly waits for TK. Especially in the 3rd story. I kept waiting for Carlos to get involved or to solve something but he never does. This is not a criticism, I love the series, and your 2023 writing round up has me itching to read the entire series again, your writing and it's the relationship between TK and Carlos that is the best part of the series for me, the mystery and the art stuff is the wonderful icing on top. I'm just curious about why Carlos is mostly sitting on the sidelines. Was it just the way it worked out, or was it a deliberate writing choice, and if it was would you mind talking a little about why you made that decision?

Sorry, sorry! I have a curse where if a message gets marked as read my mind immediately forgets it. I have to keep messages open or marked as unread if I want any hope of remembering to answer them. My work computer is just a mass of open emails so I get annoyed enough by them to answer them.

So, firstly, thank you for reading. I'm glad you like the stories.

SPOILER SPACE for anyone who doesn't want to read further.

Secondly, it's an interesting question, and not one I'm quite sure how to answer. I don't think I'd considered Carlos as passive in the stories when I was writing them.

Someone in one of the comments on Knave 1 asked for TK running a con, which is honestly what I thought Knave 2 was going to be when I started writing it, but then it turned into something else entirely. But, I did want it to be about Carlos being good at his job - about putting the pieces together. Some of that was finding and understanding the clues that TK was leaving him, but some of it was also him figuring out what was suspect even before then. I wanted it to be about him knowing TK, which gave him the kind of faith he needed to believe in TK even in his absence.

But, on a broader level I also wanted Knave 2 to be about Carlos being in a place where he could have the kind of conversations with his parents that he hadn't been able to have when he was 17. And, he was in that place because of his relationship with TK, and the way that's evolved in the year he's been with TK and the way they've both grown together and can buttress each other when they need it.

Knave 2 was about Carlos's past, so I wanted Knave 3 to be about TK's past. And, I can see how Carlos might come off as passive in that context, because he is kind of waiting for TK to come home. He can't make that choice for TK, and he can't tell TK what to do, because that's not a kind of relationship that he wants.

The story is - on purpose - about TK making a decision to stay and making the commitment to his future, because I wanted it to mirror the S3 moment where TK goes all in on their relationship and chooses it with both hands and his whole heart. And that was going to look a little different in this universe, but I wanted Knave 3 to be about TK's past and TK's future with Carlos.

I think there's also something about the stories being from Carlos's POV that maybe feeds into some of the perception that maybe he's passive? He is fascinated by TK, because TK is magnetic (because he's a Neal Caffrey simulacrum). We don't necessarily get the way that TK sees Carlos because we aren't inside TK's head (I personally find getting inside TK's head incredibly hard, which is why I very rarely write TK POV). But I'm not sure I meant that to come off as things only happening to Carlos without agency.

I'm not sure if this really answers your question or not, but it has been interesting to examine what I was trying to do & whether or not I pulled it off, so thank you.

[sugoi-and-spice]

Okay Hi again. I'm the Anon that made Dust Daddy Bible a thing. I wish to open the Dust Daddy Bible again and take a few new notes as I am curious if you can reveal some hcs about the Reader that once again has already been revealed/you wish to share? Maybe even some Hcs bout other characters like Spinner? Maybe some hcs that'll never see the light of day that you wish to share?

I'm also a bit curious on what inspired you to write PN and how does your general planning looks like for the series? I was inspired by you to start my own fanfic but alas...making hcs and an actual story is very hard and ends up in the dirty mostly white gutters fast.

Hey Anon! So glad to hear that my weird little Au fic inspired you!! I'm certainly happy to explain my inspiration and process a bit!

This took A LOT longer to write up than I anticipated, but I wanted to be thorough lol. So, in an effort to not make these novel of a post any longer than it needs to be, I'm just gonna answer the second half of your ask, rather than the headcanon stuff. But if you wanna re-ask that in a separate message I'll be happy to answer. ^_^

Alright, onto Spice's Fanfic Plotting 101!

So full disclosure: I get a lot of (if not most) of my ideas from other media and in some case other fanfics. For Play Nice, I was really inspired by the fic: The Danger Next Door by ratmonkey. I really liked that dynamic of the creepy forced friend with the popular girl and wanted to explore that in a one-shot. But of course, as I got writing, I ended up taking it in a completely different direction that I thought better suited the types of long-format stories I liked to tell and fit better in my writing style. And they went in two wildly different directions.

I'd never be ashamed of that idea origin though -- and neither should any of you. If you decide that you want to write literally the plot of Titanic but with Jujutsu Kaisen characters, fucking do it - it'll be original just on the basis that it'll be written by you. It's as the saying goes:

Good artists borrow, great artist steal.

So that's where the original idea came from. But as for expanding an idea into a full fic? Lately, I've been using the three following steps to do that:

1. Pilot.

2. Outline.

3. Schedule.

Self-explanatory right? No? Haha, well then--

So a pilot, in the way that I'm using the term, is the first episode of a tv show that serves as a prototype of a series. When a network likes a concept that they're pitched, they'll typically order a pilot episode to showcase the series' potential and gauge audience interest before committing to making a whole season.

This is essentially the same thing I do with a fanfic concept - a Pilot Phase. I write the idea as a one-shot or short multi-chapter fic, something that has a satisfying ending if I leave it as is, but that I could also expand on later. I measure how good or poor the response is as well as my own enjoyment and inspiration while writing, and if it's all great - I'll move forward into turning it into a longfic.

After that, I move into the Outline Phase. Outlining goes such a long way in keeping a fic consistent and motivated, imo. There are a lot of writers that start writing without any goal in mind, and then eventually burn out because they run out ideas. No shade to anyone who does btw! There are writers out there who can write without an outline and make something complete and amazing. And even those who do end up running out of ideas and abandoning a fic, fanfiction is all about fun at the end of the day. But for someone looking to break out of that habit and finish their long fics consistently and with quality, outlining and having a clear direction can really help mitigate these pitfalls.

Outlining can also work wonders for eliminating the ever-dreaded blank page. If I'm starting a chapter, even copy-and-pasting a word for word description like the following gives me something to work with:

"The beginning of MC and Shigaraki’s new routine. Bratty back and forths. Although by the end of it, Shigaraki decides that the time they have together is not enough and sets a new plan in motion."

And then I can expand and flourish the language from there, I'm not starting from nothing.

But of course, writing out a whole outline can be just as intimidating if not more so - after all, how do you go from a blank page to "here's all the plot!"? Well, this is why the Pilot and Outline Phases actually go hand and hand for me. Writing a Pilot/One-shot version when I'm first inspired by an idea means that when I start expanding it into a long fic, I'm also not starting from nothing! I already have a story or dynamic started, so it's a lot easier to build ideas and plot-points off of that, rather than just pulling a whole story out of thin air. They're very symbiotic.

Now, writing a good outline could easily be a whole giant post itself, and there's no one right way to do it. For me, I really like to use my outlines to track character arcs and different storylines. Play Nice has about four major different Plots and Sub-Plots going on that I label alphabetically and track in each episode.

Now as anyone that has read Play Nice can tell, these story beats are not necessarily all separate scenes or plotlines or anything - the A, B, & C Plot of this episode are all part of the same actual scene, but I still like to note them and the different effects that even one line of dialogue has on all these different plot points!

Identifying which story beats belong to which plot points helps me keep track of the progress of each one so that I don't write five chapters in a row just about Shigaraki and his relationship with AFO and suddenly realize "Oh shit! MC hasn't been in the story for like five chapters!" (Extreme example, but you get what I mean lol).

I also write out character guides and such in my outlines with the characters' wants, needs, and - in these AU fics - their alternate backstories. Crafting those things for a character however could, once again, be it's own whole post - but knowledge of Want vs Need and keeping character arcs in mind is what takes any piece of media to that next level, not just fanfic. :)

(You can find a great brief on Want vs Need here - welcome to Spice's film school friends xD)

One last note on outlines, is that you don't have to be beholden to them. I move around plot points I've outlined for earlier episodes into later episodes all the time. Play Nice was originally outlined as like a 15 chapter long-fic, but as the story has developed, that's obviously doubled (potentially tripled as I already brain-storm the sequel lolol). But yeah, Outlines are a map, not a bible.

So the Pilot and Outline phases make up the bulk of my patented fanfic process lol. But the icing on the cake that really keeps a fic moving for me is to keep a Schedule.

Full transparency if you didn't know already, I've worked professionally as a freelance writer for a little over three years now. And before that I got a BFA in Screenwriting. So I'm admittedly pretty used to having weekly deadlines for my creative writing now. My grades and rent have depended on it for 7+ years. There were absolutely weeks where, even on a project I loved, the absolute LAST fucking thing I wanted to do that week was write. But I had to push through if I wanted to get paid.

By setting the same type of schedule and expectations for myself, I'm able to hold myself accountable and force my way through even the worst writer's block. There's no real other trick to this one, I'm sorry to say. You just need to set a doable schedule and stick to it.

Now, I am fully aware of the irony of me stressing the importance of schedule right when Play Nice is in a bit of a slowdown - but I am only human. And while I have switched to a monthly posting schedule, I do still keep a similar writing schedule: I try to finish at least a rough draft of a chapter every two weeks. It just takes me a lot longer to edit the chapters now because they're so freaking long these days.

And, you know, this isn't my job. I write fanfic to have fun and explore ideas and themes that I don't necessarily want connected to my personal brand (*cough* Non-Con & Problematic Relationships *cough*), as well as to write for fun without the worry of whether or not an idea is sellable. If any of you do decide to take these tips and tricks for yourself, please remember to keep having fun and not put too much pressure on yourself!

(Also, a little Step 2.5: I try to have at least two chapters - preferably three or four - written past what I'm posting that week. For example, Chapter 20 is the last chapter I uploaded, but I'm actively writing the rough draft for Chapter 23 at the moment. I write in little arcs essentially, that way I can switch out moments between episodes and make edits to keep them all connected).

So, yeah! That's more or less my process! There's a lot more I could say but this post is already way too long, so if you have any follow-ups please feel free to send them in. Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk lol. I hope it was helpful for some of you and not just super lecture-y and pretentious. 😅 At the end of the day, whether you write a one-shot or a long fic, finish or abandon it, the fact that you put your ideas into existence is amazing.

¡Adiós!