#idk it's just really nice. if i had this exact same day in first year (doing economics and barely leaving my room)

[hella1975]

there's a very specific kind of vibe that comes with living with your friends in final year that it just does not have in first year or even second year. like as a fresher it's usually the first time any of you have lived away from home let alone with SO MANY people your age and it's terrifying and exciting and randomised to boot so it's generally carnage for a whole year in the best and worst ways, and then second year you pick who you're living with and it feels like for the first time you're doing this adult thing PROPERLY. you have a place of your own now. these are the people you've chosen to live with. studying gets serious etc. but it's still fresh. it's still new. you still don't know how to navigate it. but final year? final year is when you actually get it right. you know how to manage your time better. you know what works for you and what doesn't. studying is the main focus and you've been out in the world for three years now and it's not loud and boisterous like it was in first year and you're not exciteable and awkward like you were in second year. you're comfortable. every single one of my flatmates has their own friend group and we mainly keep to our own social circles, but we'll still meet each other back at the house after a night out and sit in the kitchen or my room to do the debrief. sometimes i'll go days not seeing either of them despite sharing a house but every now and then someone will softly call up the stairs that 'the heating's on!' or one of us will sneeze and the other two will yell 'bless you!' through the walls. the lack of interaction isn't interpreted as dislike in ways it would have been even last year, because we're all just old enough to be past that now and settled enough in our friendship not to worry about it. idk. uni is very loud and unsettling a lot of the time so it's been really sweet to see how almost boringly comfortable final year is.

[bloompompom]

Count to Ten

In which you gift your husband a Polaroid camera, granting him exactly ten opportunities to take whatever pictures he wants of you.

♡ content: ~4k word count. eren jaeger x female reader. modern/domestic au, established relationship, porn without plot, consenting sexy photos, oral sex (f!receiving & brief m!receiving), body worship, mentions of reader wearing a dress, mentions of spit, pet names, alcohol, eren's a punk but we love him anyway, mushy fluff? idk i think it's cute. ♡ a/n: this has been rotting my brain for weeks so i finally had to bestow this filth upon you, enjoy.

You and Eren had been together for a while now. Married for one year to the day—happy anniversary to you!—and dating much longer than that. So while, yes, today was a big day, it wasn’t as though you hadn’t celebrated countless anniversaries before. 

That wasn’t to say you didn’t want to make it special. Of course you did, who wouldn’t? There was more than enough reason to celebrate. You were soul-mated, bursting to the seams, positively buzzing with love. Humming and twirling like Cinderella while doing chores as menial as folding dryer-fresh bath towels. 

Cynics would say you were still wandering in the mooniness of new marriage, but you’d argue that had long worn off. Living together, seeing each other at your very worst—chilled, snotty-nosed, curled in sticky, feverish bedsheets—and peeing with the bathroom door wide open didn’t really leave much mystique there, did it? 

Or, on the flip side, perhaps it was more apt to say the honeymoon phase never truly ended. The spark never died, the fun never faded, because your husband (Husband! You were still getting used to that) would rather die than let that happen.

You never had to worry about Eren forgetting your anniversary. If anything, he was always one to go over the top if you didn’t reign him in every once in a while. Which was the exact reason you told him you only wanted to go out for dinner, just the two of you, at that fancy-schmancy place—as he liked to call it—downtown. 

Keeping in mind that Eren was the type to overdo it, you had a not-so-sneaking hunch he’d buy you a present, no matter how many times you insisted he didn’t need to. In preparation for just that, you planned something. Little, hidden up your sleeve, but all for him. 

You were good about sealing your lips, too, despite the gift arriving at your porch days ahead of schedule. You didn’t even drop a single hint when he greeted you after work that evening, the same huge smile on his face as always—“Hi, beautiful!”—squeezing you in those big arms. 

And they said marriage, especially the first year, was hard work. 

Eren made the dinner reservation, just as you requested, and you managed to hold onto your secret until you returned home for the night, bellies full, with faces warmed and tingly from expensive wine.

“A Polaroid camera?” Eren questioned. He was as delicate about it as he could be—you know, for someone who had never been delicate about anything in his entire life.

A confused smile, though a smile nonetheless, twitched at the corner of his mouth. You could practically see the gears shifting in his head, like he was trying to recall a time he may have mentioned an interest in photography. He did have a habit of starting (and dropping) new hobbies on a near-monthly basis. 

Traditionally, the theme for a first-anniversary gift was paper. In a roundabout way, photo paper counted. At least, that was what you told yourself when you bought it. 

Paper was supposed to represent a blank slate, ready to be slathered with memories of your new life together. And that was nice and all, but you had another idea in mind for using up the film.

Eren held the camera in his hands. It was already freed from its original packaging, sitting lonely in the box you had wrapped while he was at work. 

You inched closer to him on the couch while he inspected it, perching on your knees to drape your arms over his broad shoulders. You ran your hands down the front of his shirt, his toned chest beneath your fingertips. You did it slowly, like you were insinuating something, but Eren couldn’t begin to guess what. You caught the intrigued look on his face as you peered over his shoulder. 

You brushed some loose hair behind his ear and kissed his cheek. Eren noted the grin in your voice as you whispered, “I’ve already loaded it with film.” You kissed the spot below his ear, felt the shudder it gave him. “I thought we could use it together.” His neck was next, where his pulse throbbed beneath your lips. “However you’d like. Whenever you’d like.” You moved his shirt’s collar out of the way, trailing your lips lower. “But don’t forget, there are only ten photos, and once you’re out, you’re out.” 

It was something for him and him alone. Tucked away in his bedside drawer for those times—though few and far between—when he was left missing you. Sure, you could always text him a photo; you had done so before. But this was different. More personal. Tangible proof that he could hold between his fingers and know you were irrevocably his. 

Truthfully, Eren was tempted to ask right then and there if he could keep his favorite in his wallet—whichever photo that may be, the anticipation was ruining him already—but he didn’t want to test his luck yet. 

You were glad you decided to hold off exchanging gifts until after dinner. Otherwise, there was no way you would have made your reservation. You didn’t even get the chance to open your present. Not that you minded, obviously. The cute little box sat ignored on the coffee table as Eren tugged you onto his lap. You straddled him as he made out with you, your dress riding higher and higher up your thighs. His hands smoothed from the small of your back to your revealed shoulder blades. His palms, hot and already commanding, pressed you against him, and you let his tongue swipe past your lips. 

It was his own Eren-esque way of thanking you for the gift. He’d undoubtedly say it a million times later; you could predict it already. It was just that he was a little occupied right now, what with you helplessly grinding against him and all. 

He was already hard by the thought of what he could have you do for him—for the camera. Fuck, you could feel it too, your clothed pussy rutting against him, making a mess of the front of his dress pants as you whimpered into his mouth. It was a gift for him, but you vastly underestimated just how much it’d turn you on as well, knowing how fiercely he craved you, every part of you.

Eren wanted nothing more than to take you then. And he could have, but he’d rather have you strewn beneath him on your soft bed. He wanted to bask in you. The expanse of you, bare, and ready for him. Then, he could snap a photo, freeze time, and savor the sight of you forever. 

But was it too soon to take the first photo? Already, Eren was worried about running out of film, and he hadn’t even put a finger to the button. It was a gift, but it might as well have been a curse, and he was sure that was your intention. Even so, he couldn’t take it anymore. All at once, Eren whisked you to your shared bedroom and stripped you from your dress. 

It wasn’t long before Eren settled on what was worthy of his first photograph. He wished to capture the very moment he pushed inside you. The look on your face you always wore—the tiny ‘o’ your mouth made, the quirk of your brows—right when he stretched you on his cock. His absolute favorite, even years later (Really, how lucky were you that he was still this obsessed with you?) By now, he had it memorized, that heavenly expression that’d grace your features, lasting no longer than a blink of an eye but now something he could look at ceaselessly. Over and over and over again. 

But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t take his sweet time with you. No, he wouldn’t let you get off that easily, knowing you were teasing him when you reminded him there were only ten photos. 

Eren kissed you deeply with one hand wrapped around the back of your neck. His lips were smooth and slow, thoughtful, kissing you in a way he knew would leave you desperate. He would have you begging for it—for him—before he’d give you just a single drop. He’d wait as long as he deemed necessary, expertly timing his photo to preserve that angelic look you get—the rapturous mix of relief, pleasure, and a desire for more. 

You tasted him and the bottle of red wine you shared over dinner. He was sweet on the back of your tongue. You were dizzy, your head thrown back into the feathery pillows as his lips left yours to kiss the side of your face. He dawdled there, hot breath fanning over your ear as he lightly took the lobe of it between his teeth. You sucked in a sharp breath through your teeth as his mouth traveled to your neck next. Then the dip of your collarbone and between your breasts. 

He peeled your bra off, one strap at a time, wasting no time to lift you to undo the clasp at your back. He licked and nipped at the sensitive skin. The cool bedroom air stood in a woozy contrast to the gentle heat of his mouth. He ran his large hand down your side, comforting your squirming as he flicked your perked nipple with his tongue. You were always so sensitive. It was something he liked best about you. 

You felt the sear of it when his lips curled into a smile against your skin. Smug already because you were practically panting, hips writhing beneath him, and he hadn’t even reached for your underwear. 

Eren knew you’d gift him the loveliest face when he finally sank inside you, where only he could reach. The bliss that’d wash over you once he tamed the ache between your legs—your gorgeous fucking legs. He slipped your panties down your thighs, wondering if it would be weird if he took a photo of them.

“God, Eren,” you whispered. It was ragged, nothing more than a hobbled breath. “Please.”

A lazy smile tugged at his lips. “Please, what?”

He hovered over you, pressed his forehead to yours. He didn’t just want to hear it but feel it, taste it, when you spoke it into his mouth—when you asked him, with that satiny voice of yours, to please fuck you.

You realized what he was after when he reached for the camera, almost lost in the tangle of clothes and sheets. Eren held himself with one hand planted in the mattress, the tip of his cock laying at your entrance. He angled back to aim the camera straight at your face. Behind it was the signature smirk you knew all too well. Before you could comment, he tilted his hips, filling you in one powerful thrust.

He predicted it, down to the very shape of your mouth. And right when your eyes fluttered shut—flash—it was bright behind your lids. 

One down. Nine to go. 

You thought Eren would toss the camera aside, fuck you like you wanted him to, but he did the opposite. He immediately pulled out and sat back on his knees, somehow more riveted by the photo than the real you, naked and needy below him. Seriously?

You propped yourself on your elbows with a pout. “Can’t this wait?”

“I wanna see it. It’ll just be a second,” he said, waving the photo in the air. 

“I don’t think that does anything.”

He ignored you, impatiently inspected the picture—still developing—then waved it around some more. He didn’t even notice when you perked higher, leaning into him, stealing his attention the only way you knew how. 

Yup the camera—and the hazy photo, for that matter—were soon forgotten. Tossed aside the moment you wrapped your dainty fingers around his shaft. You pumped his cock with one hand as you swirled your tongue over his tip, taking him past your wetted lips. 

A groan strained from him once your lusty eyes gazed up into his. He had no choice but to reach for the camera again, even in his clouded state with his cock down your throat. How could he not? You looked so magnificent, just like this. Hollowed cheeks, blown-out pupils, swollen lips working up and down his length. 

But he’d make it up to you of course. He still needed to thank you for the gift, after all. And once you heard the click of the camera, he did just that, giving you all the attention you deserved. 

The third photo, in hindsight, was one you should have seen coming from a mile away, given Eren’s boyish tendencies. If you were to guess, you thought he would have snapped a photo while you were sleeping. An unflattering picture of you with a flailing arm over your head or drool on your pillow—something along those lines. 

Oh, don’t worry, he considered it. Eren was actually thisclose to going through with it, thinking it’d be funny to slide you the picture when you least expected it, but he restrained himself. He did take one with his phone, though.

Another, much better, idea popped into his head. He didn’t even need to wait that long, just until you woke up for your morning shower. 

Picture it—no pun intended: The metallic slinking of the shower curtain ripping open. The humiliating sound that escaped you, living somewhere between a shriek and a choke. And the snap of that damned camera you were really regretting buying.

“Eren!” 

You were surprised you stayed upright, your heart beating so fast you surely thought it had hopped into your throat. You swore it then: there was no doubt this man would be the death of you. Especially with his stupid snickering, steadfast even as you sprayed him with the showerhead.

It was more of a prank than anything. A harmless one at that, if you asked Eren. But prank or not, past the water running down your face, your expression scrunched, he couldn’t help that his eyes lingered on your chest. Nor was it his fault that he happened to catch you before you’d rinsed off, your tits barely hidden behind suds and bubbles. And, well….

“Absolutely not!” you rebuked when he tried to join you, all smooth-like, as if that didn’t just happen. And when you yanked the curtain shut, Eren retreated to the kitchen, giggling to himself while he fixed your morning coffee, exactly how you liked it, in his attempt to get back on your good side. 

It was another few days before Eren reminded you of that damned camera’s existence. On a Sunday evening of all days, when you were least expecting it. Okay, maybe the shower incident claimed that title, but this was an extremely close second. 

Earlier, you had told him you planned to watch the newest season of your favorite show, uninterrupted. It had just dropped, and you wanted to squeeze in as many episodes as possible before bed. He didn’t seem to think much of it—even said he’d come and join you at some point. That is, until you passed one another in the hallway. 

“You can’t do this to me, babe,” Eren groaned, almost a complaint but more like a whine, as if you were purposefully doing something to spite him. 

The soft smile you greeted him with drooped. 

“Do what?” you asked, plopping onto the couch and snuggling between its cushions.

Eren shot you a look, his head cocked to the side—‘Come on already’—like you couldn’t possibly be serious. 

But it was an honest question. The only thing you had done in the last thirty seconds was walk by him on your merry way back from the kitchen, oversized snack bowl in hand and filled to the brim, clad in one of his old tees and a pair of underwear—

Oh.

Eren turned to leave the room, and you just got this feeling. 

You set the bowl on the end table and called for him in a drone of annoyance. “Don’t tell me you’re getting the Polaroid.”

He shouted back, “You know it,” and by the sound of it, he was already halfway to the bedroom where he kept it. 

He returned just as hastily as he disappeared, camera in hand. Surprise, surprise. 

You bit back your amused smile as you watched him sink to his knees on the floor before you. He traced a hand up the length of your thigh, toying with the band of your underwear with his fingertips. 

“Let’s get these out of the way,” he said in that low voice you loved—the one you always felt in your chest, like the thrum of a bass. 

“Right now?” you questioned, despite raising your hips once he hooked your panties around his fingers. You shimmied, helping Eren slither them down your legs until they hung at your ankle before flopping to the floor. 

“You said whenever I wanted, didn’t you?” he teasingly reminded. You made a face, and it pulled a chuckle from under his breath. “And I still have seven photos left.”

You couldn’t fight off your grin. It was coquettish and bashful as he beamed up at you, eyes darkened and dreamy, like his entire world was between your thighs. 

Eren had you lay back into the corner of the couch. He closed a hand around your ankles, one by one, bending your legs at the knee to place your feet onto the cushions—spreading you for him. The only decency left between you was his baggy shirt. 

“Hold it out of the way for me, baby. I wanna see you.”

You lifted the hem of it to expose your bare pussy to him.

Fucking perfect. “Yeah, like that.” He got this cheesy look on his face, pointing the camera to capture all of you, fully on display. “Now, smile.”

Part of you wanted to kick the smirk right off his face. But you’d never do that; you were so weak to him, a flouncy giggle leaving you as your husband tickled at your side. You couldn’t help that it was entirely endearing, not to mention flattering, that he found you, even like this, deeply irresistible. 

“Gotcha,” he boasted with the snap of the shutter. 

Unlike the first time, he abandoned the camera immediately. Wholly unable to contain himself—captivated by you splayed before him, at face-level, like that—he looped his arms around your thighs. He pulled you closer, your legs slipping from the couch and comfortably onto his shoulders. 

“God, I fucking love you,” he breathed, intended for you but spoken right between your legs, his eyes fixed there. He licked you once with no warning, no teasing, only his tongue swiping through you. “You gonna let me return the favor since you were so good for the camera?”

A sharp gasp escaped you, like a hiss, and your head lolled back between your shoulders. You bobbed your head in an eager yes, and he lapped at you a few more times. Slow and wet strokes of his tongue before he focused on your clit. Kissing it, flicking a pointed tongue against it, kindling the fire in the low part of your stomach. Your breathing quickened. 

The more you wiggled, the firmer his grip on you, the blunt of his nails burrowing into your thighs. You noticed the sting of it when he released your right thigh. 

Eren took your hand into his and laid it on the camera at your side. His mouth only left you to say, “I want you to take a picture. One of your face. Can you do that for me?” 

He kissed the crease of your inner thigh, his breath hot on your skin, but you felt it glow at the base of your spine. 

“Take it right when I make you come, okay?”

The plea in his voice, the honeyed coo of it—it softened you. No, it absolutely melted you. It wasn’t demanding in the slightest but a needful, urgent request.

Eren knew how much you loved when he went down on you; you always made that very clear with those sweet, tiny moans of yours. He was always ready, willing, and more than happy to oblige, but he could admit he hated missing out on your face when you came on his tongue. He wanted to learn it for himself, see how you looked with your head thrown back in ripples of pleasure. And he wanted to have it forever, for safekeeping. 

He only continued where he left off once you agreed and took the camera between your hands. Eren worked his way back to the pace you liked, steadily at first, kissing and making out with your pussy until he sucked at your clit with plush lips. And when he added the tip of his tongue, your stomach started to coil. 

Selfishly, you thought he looked like he was meant to be there. Handsome as ever, his dazy, green eyes bright against the flushed hue of his cheeks. You lifted a hand to his head, brushing the curtain of hair from his face. 

“I’m going to take one of you,” you giggled airly. You angled the camera toward Eren, the lewd sight of him worshipping between your legs. 

As if you had yanked a fire alarm, he immediately stopped what he was doing. 

“Don’t,” he exclaimed. He turned the camera away from him. “It was my gift, remember?”

You rolled your eyes but conceded only because you really wanted him to continue. He wasn’t above toying with you, if that wasn’t obvious enough already. 

Eren closed his mouth over your pussy. He was sloppy about it, spitting and spreading it over you with the flat of his tongue.  

You let the camera fall beside you, hands twitching and tensing like you needed to grab ahold of something—him, the Polaroid, your last smidgen of sanity—you didn’t know what. That iron-hot coil in your stomach wound and clenched. Closer and closer to coming undone, you rolled over his tongue, him encouraging you as he moved your hips with you. 

“Come for me, baby.” It was a slurry of words, a wet mumble against you. Every syllable was another vibration through you, bringing you to the very edge.

You picked up the camera with shaky arms.

“Make it real pretty for me,” he told you.

You didn’t want to imagine what sort of contorted face you would make, and you wouldn’t dare peek at the photo later, but you aimed the lens at your face anyway. It was his anniversary gift, after all—one you thought of, at that. No going back now, so you might as well make sure he got the most out of it. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you chanted, eyes screwed shut.

“It’s a photo, not a video,” he taunted as your whimpers grew louder. 

“Fuck off, Eren,” you whined into your breathy moan of an exhale. You laced a hand in his pretty brown hair and pushed his loud mouth back between your legs. 

You came then, hard, cursing and crying out your husband’s name. It was a miracle you could even snap the photo. But you did, and you chucked the camera aside, unconcerned as to where it might land. 

The feeling was overwhelming—nearly too much. As you twisted away from his mouth, Eren knew it was his cue to bring you closer, to pull you down onto his tongue the way you wanted him to. His grasp on you was firm, but his thumb drew soothing circles against your skin, right where the fat of your thighs met your hips. 

Once you were a mere puddle of yourself, limply lying across the couch, Eren licked his lips clean to reveal his flashy smile. He didn’t look for the photograph this time—a lesson in patience—but crawled onto the couch to pull you into his arms. 

Eren tucked your head beneath his chin, his nose pushed into the crown of your head, breathing you in. He smoothed a loving hand up and down your back, your cheek pressed against his chest.

“Five left. Think you can handle it?”

[colourstreakgryffin]

HIIIIII I'M BACK, my phone was broken for a few days and even when it was fixed I had no inspo for ideas on asks... BUBUBUBUBUT I'M BACK AND I GOT AN IDEAAAA

I've been losing interest in kny recently so I think I'll go along with Hazbin Hotel!!

Hear me out so much, Husk, Cherri, or Vox with reader who does ballet... I do ballet myself and that shit is soohohohoho fucking awesome and painful at the same time, like doing a split while doing a backbend too, not even like a half assed split no no no no no. A perfectly aligned split. I've had so much moments where I thought my legs would just... *pop* like a doll's. BUT ENOUGH OF MY RANTING.

remember to take breaks and drink enough water, you don't have to rush anything. take good care of yourself, make sure you have healthy habits and treat yourself to something today, like going out to a great restaurant! idk but just make sure you treat yourself to something nice today, Chiharu :3

here's terribly deformed Charlie bringing you chocolate milk :3

Haha! I have that EXACT SAME picture! I love terribly deformed Charlie bringing me chocolate milk every Wednesday. Thanks, Lottie! You know Husk’s response to our flexibility is a resounding ‘what the fuck’ and this is my first time ever trying out Cherri! And hey, I won’t write Cherri or Vox, I’ll write both!

Husk

Husk is a sweetheart when it comes to being your boyfriend, trust me. He’s caring, he may be a bit rough with his advice but he only does so in order to protect you. He’s skilled with people and he is happy to help comfort you. His patience is high… but even Husk himself is anxious at getting to see your beloved hobby

Ballet. Well, Husk isn’t against it. He always thought it was such an old hobby. That ballet dancers don’t really exist anymore but then again, he won’t express his thoughts outloud and he gives you thumbs up when watching your practices. It’s very impressive and he isn’t against being at every single practice to performance

You know Husk is freaked out by how flexible you are. Back bends whilst doing full on splits. Satan’s fuck, he is cringing at how a human body can do that but at the same time, he’s so impressed that he just can’t bring himself to hate what he is looking at

Husk is in complete and utter awe when he can review your practice performances. Ballet may be a bit disturbing to him, due to how much it stretches the body’s limits, but it’s also so beautiful, graceful and majestic

Husk can’t pull his eyes off you and he falls into a deep state of enamour. You’re so beautiful, even more than you already are, as you dance. He couldn’t even believe it was possible 

Husk is quite protective over you, like I said before, so when you land on your ankle badly, he is rushing onto the stage to check it and carry you out to make sure you’ll heal well. He won’t let you practice or stretch or practice your flexibility until you are doing better

“Honeypot. You will win this dance, I know you will. You’ve done training for years and you look incredible as you dance. Yes, I will be there in the crowd”

Cherri Bomb

Cherri Bomb is an energetic, supportive and joyful girlfriend. One that doesn’t mind getting a bit destructive and carefree with her partner and encouraging them to have more fun with her but has a soft spot. Of course, however, you know she will take your hobby seriously and help you or watch you for you, it’s actually fun to her as well

Cherri actually finds your ballet passion ‘precious and cute’. Something she is all for since it’s such a simple, innocent, harmless favourite activity. She likes making bombs to make things explode, you love to explode the competition and grace the dancefloor stage with your beauty and poise

Cherri may seem like she isn’t much of a dancer, maybe more of a rapper but seriously, she actually is and it’s canon that she is a very skilled dancer so there is no doubt that she is either passing down her own skills in dancing, training you more or dancing with you. She will dance ballet with you and practice two-dancer ballet with you

Cherri will blow up a hole in the wall at your practice ballrooms or your performance ballrooms to make it and she refuses to let anybody else try take care of you if you’re hurt so suspect her to get into a fight, in a crime of protective passion. She wants you happy and safe, she’ll fight for that

Cherri is actually quite fine with how flexible you are and how your warm-up stretching can really stretch out your limbs. The way you lift your leg up until it’s completely vertical and both your pelvis and the underneath of your thigh is visible. She is impressed and asks if you can teach her how to be so flexible. She isn’t as disturbed as the other two, she likes it

Cherri, just like Husk and Vox, falls into a complete and utter admiration at being able to watch you perform and dance. The soothing gentle music has her head dancing as well and her single eye basically widening, she’s more in love now then ever

“Hey-ya, bubblegum. Did’ya have fun on ‘dat stage? I had fun recordin’ it! You looked amazin’, you’ll win this tournament. No problem! Of course, babe, I’ll be in the front row!”

Vox

Vox is a busy man and can be a bit arrogant at times, but he is actually quite a good boyfriend. He gives off good advice and support, he is protective with his power and he is the type to spoil his lover. When he is around, he’d doting, he’s a bit overbearing but because he cares and he makes sure you’ll always feel loved and comfortable with him

Vox is actually quite supportive but he is the voice of reason. He won’t tolerate you overdoing yourself in your precious little hobby, he will encourage to dance ballet but if you go too far, he will step in and correct your behaviours. However, that doesn’t often happen so you can dance all you want at the big practice ballroom he hired out for you and/or dancing with you

Vox isn’t sure how to feel about seeing how flexible you are… it’s pretty hot but at the same time, it’s disturbing. You’re on the floor and you’re stretching your pushed-back leg over your back so much that you’re almost in a wheel-shape with your body. He’s amazed, he is already cheering you on, he’s recording it to brag about he can’t help but feel aroused

Vox, everytime he attends your passionate hobby’s practice and performance events, records it on his phone or on his own face so he can both watch it back to admire you and to show the other Vees that he is the boyfriend of the best ballet dancer in Hell. He sometimes forgets to record it since you look so… incredible

Vox is protective, extremely protective. You’re smaller, you’re weaker. You’re less wealthy and less well off. You require constant guarding to ensure you’ll be able to make it to the next day. If you even slightly land on your ankle awkwardly, he is stomping up to the stage and taking you away so he can check up on you

You know Vox almost drops the camera he is using to record you every professional dance on the stage and he can’t stop thinking about how unbelievably beautiful you look, how you’re as silly and velvety like a swan with your every spin and flex. He takes a few seconds to snap out of his awe over you

“Come now, sweetheart. You’ve done more than enough, that dance can again-kill everybody in this room and you made all those amateurs look pathetic. I want to reward you for this. Don’t you worry, I’ll be at the final performance“

[shitpostingkats]

hello hello!! i came across your post about baron in the aromantic tag and omg i JUST. needed to say that i am having the EXACT same experience as you right now 😭, aroace watching fantasy high for the first time (though in not as far in as you im on like sy ep 6), but ive seen clips of the baron scenes before and it's just like oh my goshhhh isn't it CRAZY?? how a silly goblin boy in a dnd show makes you feel more seen than anything else on planet earth (for me at least)?? And he's such an amazing character on every single level too, i think about him and him and his mom every day... of my Life....

It's just likeeee. LIKE. Oh my gosh it's just so good. he makes me very happy. i literally started watching fh BECAUSE i saw clips of the baron scenes and knew i just needed to see this. anyway yeah this got really long but. Isn't he just the best ever TBH ....

aegfvhjksjhdl I had the exact opposite experience. Saw a single animatic for Baron's introduction scene like a million years ago and completely forgot it was from fantasy high until I got to The Scene and was like "Wait. I think I've heard this before."

Not to give to many spoilers, I came into Fantasy High knowing Riz was canonically ace but like... I wasn't sure how much of a thing it was going to be? Idk, I just figured it would be the (still very nice!!!! and important!!!) representation of just saying he's ace once or twice.

HOOOOOOOOOO boy I was not expecting to have multiple scenes that examine aceness and growing up ace that cut me to the bone. I felt seen while listening to Baron's second appearance, just validated and moved and really emotional. I straight up cried, which was doubly surprising, because the last time I cried over a piece of media I was in middle school and had just finished reading the Gregor the Overlander series. Brennan and Murph just wonderfully captured a lot of really hard to articulate emotions, emotions I was always convinced were never really going to be understood by someone who hadn't experienced them first hand. And that meant all the more to me, listening to it. We are not alone. We are not incomprehensible.

Riz Gukgak being aroace is so important to me.

[jedi-enthusiast]

Debunking the "The Jedi are Evil" Theory Made by The Film Theorists PT 6

Point 6 - The Jedi Left Shimi in Slavery

Continuing on, Matthew says this:

"In fact, the Jedi care so little about the relationship between parent and child, that in the Prequel trilogy Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan literally leave Anakin's mother on Tatooine to continue living in slavery in Episode 1. We're told that they take Anakin, but not his mother because they don't have the money to buy her freedom from Watto."

WRONG!

And, what's funny is, he plays the exact clip that shows this is wrong right after he makes this statement.

They didn't free her because Watto refused, likely because he didn't want to lose both his slaves in one day, but not because they didn't have enough money or wouldn't pay the price Watto set.

---

Matthew quote, continued:

"But then a decade goes by without him ever following up. At no point during the 10 year period did anyone bother to think- 'Hey, maybe we should, you know, go check on Anakin's mother to make sure she's alive or, I don't know, maybe go back to buy her freedom since we have the money to do it, and we've won the war, and her son happens to be the most powerful Force-user in history.'"

First of all, Qui-Gon fucking dies like the day after freeing Anakin--so he can't follow up--and Obi-Wan, for a nice chunk of time afterwards I'd say, is a little too busy dealing with the grief of losing his Master (or his "parent," since obviously Matthew thinks parental relationships are the only ones that matter), the mental turmoil of killing a Sith, and also the sheer whiplash of "holy shit I'm now responsible for a whole other human being, what do I do???"

Like, there's literally a whole thing in a book where Obi-Wan is like "does Anakin know how to swim???" so I think there were some more pressing matters on his mind than worrying about Shmi.

I will also say that in another video Matthew says that Shmi and Anakin were just fine as slaves because Watto is shown to "treat them well," so he can't really use both arguments in this situation. If Shmi was "just fine" in slavery, then why should the Jedi go back to check on her or free her?

Either she's fine and the Jedi have no reason to go check on her, or she's not fine and the Jedi need to.

One or the other, buddy.

Plus, only Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, and Anakin knew about Shmi. Qui-Gon dies, Obi-Wan is juggling enough things as is, and Anakin clearly never tells anyone else about his mother--so what was anyone else supposed to do about someone they didn't even know existed?

Second...you're getting your movies and also literally everything that happens mixed up.

The Jedi do not "win the war," a war fucking starts--which spreads them thin across the galaxy to the point that they can barely take care of the problems right under their noses without another fire starting somewhere else that they need to get to, so I doubt they'd have the time to go searching for Shmi. Plus, at the end of that war, the Jedi get fucking genocided...idk what you want them to do while they're getting murdered in the halls of their home.

Now, if you're talking about the mess on Naboo, that is over at the end of TPM--not in the "10 year span" you're talking about. It wouldn't be a stretch to say that, if Obi-Wan did go back to try and buy Shmi's freedom, that Watto's answer would be the same, and what would be the point of Obi-Wan going back a day after Watto already refused to ask the same question again?

And why isn't Padme held to the same standard?

Why aren't you asking why she--with more money, power, time, and resources--didn't go back to free Shmi?

Interesting double standard there.

---

Matthew quote continued:

"What makes the death of Anakin's mother all the more tragic, is that all of it could have been prevented. He reaches her just as she's in her dying breaths. Had he arrived days, or even hours earlier, his journey to Tatooine might not have ended with him having to bury her. The only reason that Anakin even knew about her is because he could sense her suffering."

Yeah, it could have been prevented...if Anakin had actually told anyone about his dreams.

In AotC Anakin mentions to Obi-Wan that he's been having dreams about his mother, but he doesn't elaborate. And when Obi-Wan tries to talk to him about those vague dreams that Anakin is telling him fuck-all about, Anakin switches the subject to Padme and doesn't bring it up to Obi-Wan again.

The Jedi are shown again and again to be extremely empathetic and, as I said before, they don't bar people from visiting their biological families if that's what they choose. If Anakin had actually told Obi-Wan "I've been having dreams of my mother dying on Tatooine and I can literally sense her pain and suffering," odds are that Obi-Wan would have encouraged him to go and check on her.

And it's made clear that Anakin was having those dreams for a while. His mother was gone for a month. If, at any point in time Anakin had actually told someone about his dreams, he probably could've gone to check on her earlier and would've been able to save her.

The only reason that Anakin wasn't supposed to go later on in the movie was because he was literally the sole person responsible for the safety of a very important Senator who people were actively trying to assassinate.

[heloflor]

Probably my hottest Mario take: I might actually like the 1986 Anime Movie more than the 2023 Movie. Yes the 2023 one is a better movie overall while the 86 Anime didn’t age well and is filled with plot conveniences and random things happening just because, along with the bad animation, questionable voice acting, weird soundtrack and sound design, but idk I still really like it.

It’s just that there’s something very charming about that movie. It came out a single year after the first Super Mario Bros, back when there was little to no lore about the Mushroom Kingdom, and it really shows in the way enemies are used and random characters exist but also you can tell they made an effort with the little they had. It’s like watching the very beginning of the franchise, way before it became the phenomenon it is today, and there’s something about it I really like.

I’m also fascinated by the way Peach and Bowser were written in it. This was the first time these two were given a personality past “evil bad guy” and “damsel in distress”. And not only are they both great in the little screentime they have, but these new personality traits, given one single year after the creation of those characters, remain to this day their personality, albeit with a few small tweaks (Bowser being a dad becoming a huge part of his character, Peach losing her temper in most versions). Kinda funny how these two are the biggest highlight of the movie despite only being in it for like 5 minutes, but still, love what was done with them.

And when it comes to comparing it to the 2023 Movie, I actually find it hilarious how many similarities the two have, including having the exact same skeleton for their story. It’s been 37 years yet Nintendo is still writing the same thing, I love it (more on the comparison here).

Oh yeah and because I just know there are some people who will go “the hell you like about this movie?!”, here’s an actual list!

- Literally everything about the intro is great once you get past the weirdness of the Mushroom people coming out the TV. We get Mario playing the Famicom, Peach managing to defend herself for a while before getting overwhelmed, Mario being hilariously chill about all of this, Mario more than willing to fight Bowser until he sees just how enormous Bowser is and gets intimidated, the back and forth between Peach and Mario hiding behind each other, that moment where Bowser gets rid of Mario with one finger and then smiles about it followed by a beat and then Peach starts throwing furniture at him, the Game Over screen, Luigi reacting like you’d expect. Just. Everything about this scene is great!

- The wooden title cards look amazing. It’s a small thing, but I love the “fairytale” vibe it gives the movie. And now that I think about it, that might also be why I’m being so nice with this movie, since fairytales do tend to be small stories with little going on and not always making sense, making it easier to forgive its flaws.

- The shop scene is also very solid in showing us who Mario and Luigi are as people and how they play off of each-other. On that note, I like their dynamic. It’s a bit of the usual bickering siblings who would still do anything for each other, but it works.

- The meeting with the wizard guy is also solid with the way Mario and Luigi react to things. It’s a bit of an exposition dump, but you can tell they try to make it entertaining. Plus, it works for how simplistic the story is (yes I’m giving this movie a lot of slack).

- The travel montages...yeah I’m gonna be honest with this one, it sucks. I do like how they use them to show the different power-ups they get, but it’s still very boring and I skip them when watching the movie. Except for the last one on the airship, that one is pleasant.

- Luigi tripping on mushrooms. Do I even need to say more? But yeah that whole sequence with the paratroopa is nice (once you get past the fact that a turtle made a bunch of birds). And I like how clever Mario gets to save himself and Luigi from the babies.

- I’m not one to care about people drawing smut of cartoon characters, but the internet is sleeping on those Toads. That’d actually be hilarious if the main takeaway the fandom had of this movie were to be the Toad girls. And on an unrelated note, their designs is more original than the Toads we get now!

- The whole sequence with the Piranha plants and the Lakitu honestly bores me and drags on a bit. The Piranhas might also be the worst animated part of this whole thing. I do like how much of a selfish bitch the Lakitu is though. Idk, that’s a fun character in their shittiness.

- The scene in the cavern is fine. I like how the Hammer Bros is used as that intimidating guard, and we get to see Luigi be the one to solve the issue this time around! On that note, I love that Luigi’s love for money isn’t only for jokes but is at times used as a plot point (him later on flooding the castle and finding Mario’s star). Mario’s daydream is also pretty cute.

- I probably watched that scene between Peach and Bowser a dozen times since I re-discovered this movie this year. I adore the way they are characterized, especially in the context of this being the first time they’ve been written this way. Bonus points for Bowser who has no rights being as adorable as he is in this. Ultimately this scene doesn’t really advance the story, but I still love that we got some insight on who these two are at such an early stage of the franchise’s existence.

- The underwater scene is also a slug to go through, though it’s interesting to see how they used the Cheep Cheep. Also Mario dressing up as a ballerina while the dog references that one queer music star is a yes.

- I find the third act of this movie to be honestly solid. Sure there are some contrivances with the fire platforms room and the water somehow destroying the castle, but I still like it. Granted it might be due to how much screentime Bowser gets here. Speaking of which, it’s actually surprising that Bowser turns down Peach when she promises to marry him if he lets Mario alone, with Bowser refusing because he knows Mario might be trouble since he already ate two of the power-ups. This is probably top five smartest things Bowser has done in the entire franchise. This isn’t an insult to Games Bowser btw, I fucking love this dumbass, and he is kind of a dumbass when interacting with Peach in this movie as well!

- While the ending is hated for a reason and I do find it dumb as well, it’s still incredibly sweet how Mario accepts it and wishes happiness on Peach.

So overall, is the 86 Anime good? Ehh, not really. But if you’re able to get past all the weird shit going on, it’s very charming as a piece of Mario history, and it’s especially funny to see all the small things that end up becoming a core part of the franchise. And because of that, I can’t help but like it more than the 2023 Movie, even if the 2023 one is an overall better movie (I’d give the 86 Anime a 4,5/10 and the 2023 one a 6/10 in terms of movie quality; but in terms of enjoyment the 86 Anime is above the 2023 Movie for me)

[hongthoven]

hiii i saw your requests are open and omfg- off topic but youre so pretty😞🫵 hongjoong would deffo be proud of himself for having you as his stan. NO JOKE.

Ahh also I've read almost every work youve done and your writing style, everything just- HOW YOU WRITE IS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING, I could go on reading everything written from you for hours!

Anywayy- again, I saw your requests are open and ahaha since Im not a writer, and I admire you like A LOT i really wanna share one of my scenarios these days and mayyybeee you could writeeee abouuuuttt itttt hehe (ofc if you want --I wont be mad if you never make it lol ill continue support your work!)

So- IM SO WHIPPED FOR SEONGHWA. Been loving my man for years now lmfao so you already know whos this aboutt~, anyway hehe, i was thinking maybe writing 9th member fem!reader ! Ateez (and reader included ofc ofc) are going on vacation in a really nice hotel, with beach outside, everything's perfect for the members to relax a bit from their busy schedule! Reader is also kind of bf and gfs with seonghwa? I mean everyone in the industry AND out of the industry ships them, call them power dynamic and stuff and, even before that, reader and hwa always had that tense. Yk, reader is prettt close with all of her members, they feel like big brothers to her but fucking Park Seonghwa is driving her AND HIM insane since training day. Reader though, is mostly closer with Mingi if not Seonghwa and they are so so touchy with each other, flirting but for fun and nuh uh girl Seonghwa is POSSESSED. Hes so jealous and he doesnt even hide it. Doesnt even try to hide it. He doesnt have a problem with Mingi but when he sees his hands all over you gosh he really wants to make him watch you getting railed by him.

+ its beach day and ateez decide to play shoulder fights? Chicken fight? Lol idk how to say it and Reader get paired with Mingi which causes Seonghwa watching her thighs all over Mingis face. Ahhh- JEALOUS MUCH. Let me add also that of course Seonghwa and reader share the same room so in their way back from the beach it was so tense. Lol- kind of vers2 from your hongjoong jealous bf fanfic. (I RLY LOVED IT BTW🥲)

Im so so sorry if I didn't give you my exact thoughts but- i trust you enough to make it your own~ adding your little details and everything. Youre so talented I dont think you need my details- I think i gave out the main parts!

Thank you so much for your time and I hope you have, will have and had a nice day<33 im so excited for your new works!

(English is not my first language btw so excuse me if something did not make sense)

(actual representation of me reading the beginning of that message-- please??? what if I'm kicking my feet in the air and squealing right now? that was adorable! thank you so much ♥ I'm nowhere near beautiful, what you see is the disgusting reflection of my neverending love for Kim Hongjoong, nothing moooore...!)

I'm so sorry it took me AGES to get this request done but it is finally posted ♥ here ♥ !

I hope you enjoy! Thank you so much for requesting and for your lovely words! ♥

[ode2rin]

us again 🙁🙁🙁🙁 it was actually so good i’m so glad you decided to pick it up again THANK YOU FOR SHARING TJAT WITH US DONT EVER LEAVE PLSKDJFB

Anyway i will send a long ask about quotes i liked because i need to express my awe and support and compliment U because omg. what.

After all, everything here in this town is about you and him. 

i like how you decided to set it in a town instead of just saying smth like city or whatever, because i find it more like … romantic? and YES the way we rot in his memories he’s never getting rid of us we are his childhood and literally 19 years of his life t-t THE OTHER HALF OF HIS HEART (like u said).

And deep down, he didn’t want to believe it either – until that day you decided not to show up when you promised you would.

OUCH. the paragraphs before this one too i love the way you portrayed his coping to himself and how much of an effect we had on him 😭😭 at first i was like wrf i can’t believe we ghosted him like that but after reading the letter i would definitely do the exact same thing i’m ngl 😭😭

A thousand emotions danced in his eyes, each one a testament to the love that once blossomed between you.

i love it when they can’t ever forget about us. the use of the word blossom makes it seem like such a temporary thing and it just screams highschool romance because flowers don’t blossom often (like what… once a year or smth???) and that’s like saying our love blossomed and was peak in the past and idk what i’m saying but i hope yk what i’m saying and i hope i’m not misinterpreting ur work LOL but i just had to sauce this one in here too

In this universe, you're just some two ghosts standing in the place of you and him, haunted by the memories of what once was while trying to remember what it feels to have a heartbeat.

the alternate universe comparison I EAT IT UP ALWAYS BUT IVE NEVER SEEN ANYONE USE GHOST BEFORE TO DESCRIBE IT AND IM JUST LIKE WHAT YOURE SO SMART !!! HAUNTED BY MEMORIES TOO?? MIMI IS SO BIG BRAIN

while you share a kiss as greedy and fiery as the sea’s yearning for the moon.

the sea’s yearning for the moon that’s all.

I would’ve traded all my tomorrows for just one yesterday with you.

now this is genius. traded the tomorrows aka trading your entire future and dream and careers just for one moment in your fleeting highschool teenage romance with sae that was left in the past ……. 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

so yeah. i love your writing lots and i’m glad we’re moots<3 thank you mimi!!!!! and thanks for listening to my little rant tehe

yumi. YUMI. i would really really really love to hug you right now like this INSTANT (ಥ﹏ಥ)

the fact that you even took the time to go over the whole fic (ik it's a lot bit ._.) is enough to make me go ➡️ o(〒﹏〒)o btw i can't even start to articulate better word to tell you how thankful i am. YOU CAN HAVE A HUNDRED MANGOES FROM ME PLEASE 🥭

let me go over your fave quotes (that made my heart go swell btw wdym i have quotes now) AAAAAAA

➼ the small town !! let me telle you something, i actually love small town romance like a not so normal amount, it's prolly included in my top 5 tropes pls. i just love it when the other leaves and the other stays and by fate, they just meet again to rekindle what was once their shared memories. childhood friends to lovers is nice but if it's small town? NOM NOM I LOVE IT i've always wanted to try writing it and who's a better choice to try than our mr. i went to spain right here (even if it's not fullblown focus on that trope..)

➼ THE LETTER AHSJKAJSHAJ ngl, i would also do the same thing .. i just think sae is the kind to hold grudges lmao he definitely held MASSIVE hatred for not showing up

➼ i like using the word blossom in describing past love sometimes because (1) i love flowers, (2) it's a one time thing aka seasonal and it fits characs that yknow will fall in love once or twice in their whole life and that's it, (3) and lastly, it's temporary and it passes like time.. I LOVE YOU YUMI YOU REALLY GET ME I'M GIVING YOU SMOOCHES RN

➼ two ghost is actually a song !! i love that song so much (rumor has it that it's about taylor swift since she's harry's ex 👀) i've been listening to it and got inspired by the lyrics <3

➼ there's this children bed time story my friend told me abt that the reason why there are high tides is bec of a prince imprisoned in the sea and the moon was actually a goddess that he got punished for loving? and everytime the tide is high it means he's trying to reach for the goddess I CAN'T REMEMBER BUT THAT WAS THE STORY BEHIND IT and i decided to use it bec damn that story is the definition of yearning come on..

➼ now that line.. i was making pancakes when i thought of that oh my god and i reached out to the nearest paper i could find bec what if it leaves my mind 😭 ngl i love love love that :(

it's ME who should be glad 🫂 i'm glad i wrote make you mine bec it led u to MEEEEEEEE (iirc we became moots bec of it :>)

[the---hermit]

Geronimo Stilton and The Kingdom Of Fantasy

I had a minor emotional breakdown and of course the only logical thing to do was to pick back up one of my favourite childhood series and binge read the volumes I own. In this review I will be only talking about the first book of The Kingdom of Fantasy series, but I'll write posts on the other books aswell. Apparently this year had to start with lots of children's books, and although it is unexpected I am really happy about it. I grew up with Geronimo Stilton books, and this series in particular holds a special place in my heart (although I own only the first four books). Despite loving these books I had not read one in ages, I don't think I had ever reread them before, and it surely was a journey. This series follows the adventures of Geronimo Stilton in the kingdom of fantasy, a place populated by witches, trolls, gromes, dragons, faries and many more creatures. In this first novel we are introduced to some of the kingdoms of this amazing world, and I must say it hold pretty well to this day. The illustrations are stunning, I love the fact that each kingdom gets its own map, and there's lots of additions of mythology and fairytales, it's just a great book, and I realized that it might have influenced me more than I thought. It's also a very nice introduction to the fantasy genre for children, I think it gives off the exact same feeling of any other fantasy novel, so the fact that I love this genre so much might also be due to these books. I really recommend going back to these books, or in general to any books you loved during your childhood. This series has well over ten books but I guess most of them came out when I was more grown up idk, because I only own the first four books. This has certainly inspired me to go back to more childhood favourites in the future.

[oh-my-may]

Still the same - Oikawa x reader

requested: Could you request a scenario about Oikawa? The situation would be something like your s / o giving you an unsuspecting compliment on how good you look with glasses.lol, I'm using the translator, yyy, I hope you're okay, I'm sending you virtual hugs. <33

A/N: This got longer than expected. Tooru is just one of my favs okay I could write about him forever. This also lowkey hitting hard considering my life rn lol we really ain't getting younger out here

Also pls do tell me how you like my "new" writing style. It's a bit more ... detailed? idk, as I said before it's been a while since I last wrote stuff like this :D

I do take requests rn!

warnings: none

genre: fluff

word count: 500-ish?

It was a melancholic trip, visiting Oikawa’s family back in Miyagi now, years after High School graduation. His family was as sweet as ever, especially since they barely got to see you two nowadays. The days were busy with distant family visiting from all over, finally being able to see the golden son again, the star setter of a successful volleyball team, the Olympic player. At the end of those days, filled with stories of the old and current days, shaking hands and eating lots of traditional food both of you often just fell into bed exhausted. Today however you managed to sneak away from all the family members for a bit. Not that it wasn’t nice. It was the contrary, really. Quite thrilling, to see all these people again, to even meet new family members of his you had never met before. Moments where it was just the two of you were rare though, so you had taken the opportunity after dinner today to sneak out. Hilarious really, you were both perfectly grown adults, if you wanted to leave you could do that whenever you wanted. It still felt thrilling now, like almost coming late to class did back in the day. You had just grabbed the next best jackets laying around and then made your way around town as the sun began to set on the horizon in the distance. It felt familiar yet so foreign to you now, which gave the whole ordeal a completely different mood.

Oikawa lead you up a hill filled with big rocks. There was only a small path you could use, so he always held your hand as he moved up. “Maybe this was a stupid idea after all” he giggled after you almost stumbled again, gripping onto his hand like it was your last lifeline. Which it kind of was, to be fair. “Don’t get cocky now, Crappykawa. I could just leave you up on this hill to rot alone and go back to your loving family alone.” Tooru made a face. “You sound like back in High School.” You just showed him your tongue and continued to climb up. Quiet spread around you again. You were both thinking the same things, about High School. The way you couldn’t stand him for most part of it until quite late into your third year. The way those weeks felt then, before the big exams and afterwards, before graduation. You had always thought you knew everything about the great Oikawa Tooru there was to know – that he’s full of himself, a stubborn volleyball-freak, obsessed with himself and the game – but then realized you really didn’t. You were there when he made the decision to go to Argentina, you had witnessed the entire thought process of his behind this decision. He was vulnerable then, maybe that’s why you fell so hard for him as you did. You had to gulp now, blinking away the tears as you finally reached the mountain top. You remembered the place – he’d confessed to you here, showed you his soul, shared his secrets, his fears, his dreams. “Feels so different here now.” Were the first words coming out of Tooru’s mouth now and you looked at his side profile, took in the orange glow of the sun on his skin and hair. His jaw was more refined now, skin a bit smoother, hair a bit shorter. But he was still the same, deep down. You saw it in his eyes in this exact moment, he was still the eighteen year old with all those dreams, only now had they all come true. Yes indeed, the same man, even in the same jacket. “That’s one old jacket you’re wearing there.” You motion at the blue coat and Tooru follows your gaze. It didn’t really fit him all that well, anymore. The sleeves were clearly too short and tight for his arms, the fabric was strained over his shoulders and he hadn’t even bothered to close the buttons of the jacket in the front. “Hah, a classic. I still look good in it though, right? Right?” He posed in front of you like those models in magazines and you smiled but shook your head. “This is why I despised you in High School.” “You were no fun back then.” You just glared at him. “Yet you still chased me.” “Guess I did.” You grinned at each other and he spread his arms as you walked towards the railing of some kind of platform. In the process something fell out of his pocket and you picked it up with mild interest, only to quickly realize what it is. “Oh my god! Remember those?” You ran up to him all excited now, slapping his arm to get his attention and showing him what he’d just dropped. “My old glasses? Damn, didn’t know these still existed.” He inspected them sceptically for a moment and seemed to consider something before shrugging and putting them on, then looking down at you with raised brows. “What do you think?” You gently bit your lip at the sight, thoughts spiralling back to High School. “When I saw you with glasses for the first time… That was the first time I considered you might not be that much of a bad guy as I had thought.” That seemed to have caught Oikawa off guard, as his facial expression completely dropped to one of disbelief. “Really?!” His voice cracked, too, which made your smile to grow wider. “And now?” He was so eager now, blushing like a school girl. You stepped closer to him, stroking his cheek with your fingers and capturing his eyes with yours, keeping them trained on you. “Still the same.”

[kaythejay]

I've just had the biggest mental health win that I have ever experienced and I just want to scream it from the rooftops.

Trigger warnings for discussion of depression, suicide, and self harm.

I used to struggle with like. Depression and self harm and suicide and the like. Long story short, I've been shaving a lot more lately. I mean really for the last 2-3 years I've been shaving more. Because it finally feels safe to. When I was in the height of my depression, even just seeing a razor was enough to open up my cravings (and yes, I would call it a craving. It was the exact same feeling that I get with like. Food only instead of wanting to eat something, it was the desire to draw my own blood). And this craving wasn't something that would easily go away or could be ignored. It was worse than my sugar craving. Just seeing a razor was enough to turn every thought in my head towards wanting to draw blood. I couldn't think of or focus on anything else.

If I were to pick one up, there was no doubt that I was going to relapse that day, though usually it wouldn't be until later and most of the time it wasn't a razor that I used.

So like me being able to shave on its own feels like a huge victory. Like I don't feel myself too much at risk for relapsing at all.

But today. Today we had an even bigger victory.

So, admittedly, I did draw blood a couple of times. And because of that, I know that seeing my blood, especially when it was due to a purposeful action on my part in a self harm act, it's a huge trigger. And by "trigger" I mean that the moment I saw my own blood, I was filled with this sort of . . . Satisfaction I suppose is the word. I can't really describe the feeling because it was a dark and demented sort of joy that you only really know from having experienced it. It's not the like. Pure happy feelings that I get from being around you or anything, it's something else entirely. It's almost like this dark and twisted sort of pride. Idk. Those are just the words I have to describe it because unless you've felt it, you're not going to understand.

And with this dark and demented sort of joy came the desire to do more. And the more blood I saw, the more I wanted to do it. So like. It turned into this vicious cycle of very much so wanting to hurt myself in order to draw blood. And like. Before I started drawing blood, I was already . . . Addicted I supposed the word would be. I was addicted already to like. The feeling of like. Coping by hurting. Because it is an addiction. A very hard one to beat. But like. As soon as I drew blood for the first time, it got like ten times worse.

Anyway.

So I was shaving this morning cause I figured why not n stuff. Get my stuff I need to done and go outside in shorts and read a book for a bit. Not that I have to shave to wear shorts. But again. I figured why not cause I like the feeling of smooth legs.

And for the first time in I don't even know how long, I nicked myself with the razor. I didn't regress at all. My first thought wasn't "oh that's nice. Let's do more." Like it would have been a couple of years ago. Even just last year, I think that's what my first thought would have been. But no. My first thought today was "oh. I forgot how much that hurts. Let's get that taken care of."

I know a bunch of internet strangers probably aren't going to care about any of this, but like. I'm so beyond happy right now. I just kind of sat down and cried for a little bit because I've come so far and I've gotten so so so much better now. I just want to scream because of how happy I am. It didn't even hit right away the absolute weight of what just happened. But wow. Wow wow wow.

[chikaoofka]

helloooo you rbd the "ask me about my ocs" post from me so i am here to ask you abt them (even if you said youre not good at answering them. 😔🤝😔)

i would like to know... anything! about ur ocs :] but i know from experience vauge questions r hard to answer so maybe some trivia? like, howd you choose their names or designs. thatd be cool doesnt have to be the sol ones either !! or i think ur sol ones are also repurposed ones? so their original forms would be cool too. either way i would find it interesting :D

you are so nice to me

AND YOU KNOW ACTUALLY? NAMES & DESIGNS I WAS THINKING TO MYSELF JUST NOW "OH THEY AREN'T THAT INTERESTING" THEN I REMEMBERED NO? THEY BOTH HAVE NAME-AND-DESIGN STORIES? that I find funny anyway........

also i realise how long this is IM PUTTING IT UNDER A READ MORE.

the readmore fucking MOVED?

& ONLY cassius was repurposed . though like before SoL he was . essentially nothing . rotting in my beloveds toyhouse-folder w TWO images (NOW HE'S GOT THE MOST IN MY TH AT... 40...) because I didnt know what to do with him (and it's like... i don't wanna move him out D:) & then i made him in SoL and i think a neuron fired or something idk what happend . the moment I drew him w short hair it all went downhill i think . Anyway, so original cassius, he's named after (coughs) Cassius by Foals . I SAY THIS EVERY OTHER DAY I FEEL "LISTEN TO CASSIUS BY FOALS" (LINKED, THIS TIME.) BUT HE CAME ABOUT COS I SAW A TEMPT6T VIDEO WITH UHH

SOMEONE AS THE GEN 4 GUITARIST. AND FOR DAYS I WAS IN A STATE OF LIKE... ILLNESS? "I NEED TO NAME SOME OC CASSIUS" (....) "I WANNA MAKE THAT GUY AN OC" (....) oh mon dieu now there's a blonde guy in my brain . what the fuck . what the hell? who let him in dude dude dude dude what the hell . tangent but he even was in a band. at first. cos of course he was . a band, fun fact, based on AN OLD POKEMON BAND I HAD . WHICH I HADN'T TOUCHED IN YEARS . BUT cassius was based (i say based loosely) on a shiny minccinno/cincinno named "S I N" so that's fun & the bassist (i.e.) the only other one i . sketched (half-finished?) . i wanna say "oh haha he looks like alfie but with glasses on" but he doesn't . not at all ??? he would have had the same colour hair though. so that's like... the exact same character then

see. him? i wanted to put him here he hasn't seen the light of day in months . ok . where was i . oh yeah this was dropped pretty quickly cos i didnt know what to do with them LOL. now long-haired cassius has been repurposed AGAIN to be cassius' older brother in........the loathingverse! which is cool :-)

& even like i tried so hard to make him fit with the song back when but it NEVER worked and then he gets LOATHING'D AND NOW HE FITS? what the hell man

.

also alfie. alfie oh my god alfie can i say? can i start? do not look at me strangely for this but

this was who he was based on. alfie from fucking blue y . i dont know how i found him nor why i wanted to make a character named alfie because of it but i did AND i needed a name for my achievement hunter (which i portmanteaued, horribly, into his last name) save file(s). So alfie achivunter it was.......... and AND THIS IS WHY HE'S LIKE. THE "DOG GUY". and thats why he looked like THIS at one point :

but i was making his ref & i was like. dear lord this looks atrocious . so im pretty sure i colourpicked from like . ron inside job or something (i distinctly remember being like "this sucks" "what if i made him look like ron instead" & i did) instead and now he looks NORMAL except NOW HE LOOKS LIKE CONNOR SCP CONTAINMENT AND RON INSIDE JOB???? like okay i feel mental every time i say this but like come ON . COME ON?

the Exact Same Man. ok???? i feel like a detective gone mental pointing to a board with red threads and photos like DON'T YOU SEE? IT'S ALL CONNECTED!!! THEY LOOK THE FUCKING SAME!!!!!!! THESE THREE LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh and fun fact alfie is short for alfred he really cannot win . have i said this before? i probably have

& one last thing I guess

these little dots beneath the eyes . it basically means he's got a little evil in him OR really, IMPOSSIBLE TO GET FORESHADOWING. unless you .... know...... the cosmosdex??? yeah. i thought itd fit AND right beneath ALL OF MY OTHER INSANITY. WITH AN ACTUAL LITTLE TRIVIA POINT? HUUUUM. OKAY?

[happylandfill23]

idk what to ask so just… tell me whatever you want about your ocs

ooh i get to ramble about them :DD

ok so i basically have a bunch of different ocs who are all part of different stories n stuff so here's just some whose lives actually connect but have no real overarching story

⚠️ first off: there's some kinda heavy topics here that are listed before each character as well as in the tags, so please don't read if you're uncomfortable with them ⚠️

leviathan (levi)

tw: verbal abuse, transphobia

tw: verbal/physical abuse, sa

my most recent doodle dump had a character named levi, but he's actually a really old character who i made like 3 years ago. his name was originally gerard but i changed it to leviathan but he just goes by levi for short. his parents are divorced, and his sister lives with his dad while he lives with his mom. his dad sucks and is pretty verbally abusive toward levi, going as far as being openly transphobic around him (levi is trans), but his mom is much nicer. she's not the greatest mom, but she genuinely tries her best and really cares about levi. his sister, beatrice, is quite a bit younger than levi (he's 17 and she's like 8 or something) and i haven't developed her very far but she loves the muppets so i automatically love her. every other weekend levi has to stay with his dad while beatrice stays with her mom, which levi absolutely hates. he doesn't get to see bea very often, but they get along really well when they do get to see each other. oh he also plays the bass guitar and writes his own basslines in his room instead of actually making human interaction with his mom

charles

levi has a huge crush on his friend charles (haven't posted any drawings of him yet cuz i cannot get his hair right), who i created around the same time as levi. charles has had so much go wrong in his life and his friends are basically his only support system. his mother is an absolute piece of shit, first off. she's both verbally and physically abusive to both charles and his father (who died when he was about 10). she also refused to believe him when he told her about the sa he faced, even when given clear evidence. more has happened over the course of his 17 years of life, but i'm not gonna get into that quite right now. (mostly cuz i haven't fleshed all of it out yet but i have some general ideas)

like i mentioned earlier, levi likes charles. well charles also likes him but the two idiots are too oblivious to see it lol. the two of them just can't wrap their heads around the fact that there's even a possibility the other could like them, so who knows if anything's gonna happen with them (oh something will)

despite being a bit of a fantasy character mixed with all these more realistic characters, she's still part of this little wacky friend group and i love her

avalon

ok let's stray from the kinda depressing backstories for a moment to talk about one of my favorite ocs, avalon :)

sonya is only actually home about 5% of the time. she spends most of her time at avalon's house, or at her best friend ramona's house. she hates both of her parents and her brother's never home either, so she just chooses to wander. sonya isn't really a law abiding citizen, but she doesn't care. she's the friend who your parents think is the sweetest kid who you should invite over every day, but is actually the exact opposite when she's not around them. she started driving before she got her license, she's probably drank alcohol before, she dyes her hair both without her parents permission and directly in their bathtub (must be a pleasure coming home and finding the bathtub completely blue), and she plays her electric guitar at 1am with every setting on the amp turned up all the way. she's not the type of person you'd expect avalon to date, but the two just kinda click. they balance each other out nicely and they're really the only two people who've understood each other.

avalon is an elf girl who's dating another one of my ocs, sonya (i'll get to her later). i don't really have much about her backstory planned, but i wanted to talk about her anyway lol. she's mute, and has been since she was 13 (she's 16 now). because of this, she finds it hard to communicate with other people and tends to feel a bit like she's being ignored, but sonya always makes sure she's understood. she has an older sister, willow, who's very protective of avalon's safety. her parents, florian and rosa, are also pretty protective and try to make sure avalon stays out of trouble. because she's been safeguarded her whole life, she finds it hard sometimes to do things out in the world, and her mutism doesn't make it easier either. but she tries her best and finds new ways to do things almost every day. she usually just spends her time reading, baking apple pie, or kissing sonya though.

sonya

there are more ocs that i'd love to ramble about but i'm almost done my raccoon puzzle so if you have any more questions feel free to ask them!!

ramona

ramona is a bit similar to sonya in the sense that she's completely different around people other than her close friends. everyone perceives her as pretty much a "little miss perfect". she's in student council, she volunteers places, blah blah blah. in reality, she's fucking unhinged and will do anything in her power to bother her friends. it's just how she shows affection i suppose

[kalims]

I just like really need to get this off my chest, so please. I don't care if you're just gonna read this but I'm so sick so I just wanna let it all out

ever since online started, my first thought was: yay! no more school. cause I thought it'd be easier for me. news flash, I was completely fucking wrong. for the last, what? two years my mental health has been crashing down, sometimes there's times where I think: oh. this is actually okay, I think I'm gonna be fine but then the next moment I'm bawling my eyes out about something I never wanted to live my life doing.

school sucks. it took me years, semester after semester to get used to it. my first year was horrible, I was behind everything. I ignored everything, I procrastinated my works and I thought when it was finally time to pass them: I'll never get past this. but im here, somehow I'm here and yet again I'm facing another wall. i feel hopeless again. and this year. it's the most hopeful I've been, I've been better. so much better than this is the first time I've ever been truly proud of myself. but now I don't know anymore.

my grades came and I'm ashamed to say they aren't high, funny how I'm insecure even about a few numbers thats supposed to decide my life course.

it's unhealthy but when I face things like this, the only thought I had was how much I wanted to die. im humiliated of myself because I'm so fucking pathetic, I can change my life right now but I can't and i don't even know why. it's funny cause i keep telling my freind that I'll kms but I'm still alive, cause im too young. and i don't know how to disappear. I'm trying to stay alive because for once, I want to be good in something that no one will ever surpass me in.

my mom's facing me right now, she's laughing. I can see that she's holding in her laughs at the face of my tears.  she's comforting me but I can't take her words to heart. it goes out of one ear and out of the other.

and as much as I love everyone I've met with all my heart, my freinds, I love them so much and I appreciate them. but sometimes I feel so lonely because no one has ever said nice things to me, to validate my feelings, but I was okay because I was always used to being left with my thoughts and just passing one of it with a few jokes. I hate that no one was ever willing to ask me: "are you okay? do you wanna talk about it?" without me asking for it first. maybe some people did ask me about it, I cant remember. thank you for them.

even if I did receive one of them. I probably chose to brush it off. god I make no sense right now.

to the strangers, people, online and irl freinds I have. I'm so sick, my best freind. I always played as someone she could trust, I hate that I'm talking to her behind her back rn but I couldn't fucking careless right now because I can't tell if I'm just on my period. whenever I rant to her about topics I'm interested in (an anime, genshin, just topics I love) she always just sends one worded replies like "what" or "okay" one time she even told me that she couldn't give a shit about things she didn't know about. a few days ago, idk when. she asked to rant about her book, which of. I didn't even know about. I told her "sure. do you even have to ask?" and then I let her send me lengthy messages, I even made comments about it.

I'm so sick telling other people the exact same words that I want to hear.

okay let's put it simply. I'm the therapist friend, I always wanted to take psychology. I'm the girl that asks google on how to comfort someone so I can provide better comfort. I'm selfish for wanting to be comforted myself but who the hell am I anyways? I don't have a lot of irl freinds, sometimes in online I feel isolated cause I don't really ever fit in. I'm not pretty, I know I can be smart if I actually put in the effort and if I wasn't so lazy, I'm not rich, in fact my family isn't very wealthy. I look at other people and the only thing I can do is stare in envy because I can never get it.

I don't know how to make myself look good, I don't know shit about makeup, I don't even know anything about basic information I'm supposed to do. I know I won't able be ever let outside my house to hang out with friends because my parents are strict.

I hate that all my friends are better than me in one way or another. I always thought to myself: I want to live another life. because i was truly, upset, and unhappy in this one. no matter how many times I feel happy there's always gonna be something that's gonna drag me down again.

when I finally choose to open up to my parents, the thing they always do is laugh at me. they treat my words like it's a joke, maybe it's just a common reaction but I'm sensitive. that sounds oddly like a pick me but I want to be honest with my feelings without using jokes to dismiss it.

I love them, but I hate them because they always choose to try and force my feelings out of me. they threaten to take away my phone when I dont talk to them and it's exhausting to talk about something that I don't wanna talk about to someone like them.

I'm tired. I'm tired of being a big sister, I'm tired of being a daughter, I'm tired of being a freind, and I'm so fucking tired of living. it sucks.

I'm so tired of being yelled at because I didn't have the energy to finish a school work that I didn't want to do in the first place. I'm tired of being called that it's my fault for having a bad grade. I'm so fucking tired of putting up with everything. I'm so tired that I'm always the one being blamed when my brother does something wrong. I'm so tired of never really having anything for myself because if I ask for something it will only burden my family, so I'd be content with everything I have even if it isn't a lot as long as I'd be able to do the stuff I love.

"it will pass", I believe that saying but I just want it to end right now. I don't want it to pass. it sucks that I can't do anything right now. all I can do is drag myself to my desk and let a bunch of things confuse me. everything I do, it always ended in disaster. as much as i hate to say it, it really is all my fault.

my parents stay silent but I can't tell if their silence is worse then when they're scolding or screaming to me about something. I hate them so much because of the non-existent psychological pressure and torture they put me through. I lie to them, just so I can save myself from that again.

for now. I'll just force myself to not play anything until I finish every single fucking thing. I don't care if I end up staying up for days but who cares anyways? I just hoped my parents would've let me down slowly instead of blaming it all on me on one go. I sound so edgy rn. honestly there's a lot more but i don't have the energy anymore. this prolly means I won't post for a while. thanks. bye.

[weabooweedwitch]

Girl do you love him or do you love the approval he gives you? Do you love him as a person for who he is, or is he the first guy to show you attention and you think he's the only guy who will ever be interested in you? Sorry if that's blunt but there's a key difference and you have to be careful with this stuff because you don't want your vulnerabilities to be taken advantage of. The speed at which you've gone from 'I like him he's a nice friend' to 'I love him' is a little concerning. Go slow!!! Figure out if he's actually worth your time, be on the lookout for red flags and don't gloss over them or ignore them just to keep the relationship. Figure out if you actually like *him* separate from his approval and validation, ask yourself which qualities he has that you like/find attractive. Any rando in the world could give you those 2 things, they have nothing to do with him as a person. And don't get attached too quickly, you need to be emotionally able to back out if he's showing major 🚩🚩🚩 at any point!

(source: dated a "nice guy" for those exact 2 reasons confusing it for love, 'fell in love' fast and basically ruined the life I had because he turned out to be a cheating abuser)

(I know I've been making a lot of long ass posts and answers lately, my bad :c, I actually was trying to reply to this during my shift and then was so bushed after I got home I fell asleep)

No you're totally right dont get me wrong, very valid concerns, and I think about this constantly because I don't want to fuck up and say something to him and turn around and not mean it or whatever, or like torally ruin our friendship and creep him out and chase him away. Idk. I guess I just think of our relationship and it's always been kind of weird but good in that online friend way?

So we met and began talking around 8, 9, 10 years ago and you know we were a little flirty back then but you know, nothing serious, we were mostly just buds talking about video games and such. And we just... our friendship back then is so similar to how it is now? Like I stopped talking to him before I turned 18 (for this exact same reason actually: catching feelings and feeling like I'm putting him in a weird position) and he sought me out this year all the time later sometime in August or November, like he literally scoured facebook for me, me specifically to reconnect because he lost people during the pandemic and had a few bouts of depression and was seeking lost connections and like. Talking to him feels exactly the same. Exactly the same. He often messages me first, to send memes or jokes or start talking about a topic, like we were talking basically every day, and since we reconnected it's been exactly the same? 🥺

But I also recognize like. There was about an 8 or so year gap in our communication so I guess we have only technically known each other for like 2 or 3ish years? But 🥺 it still feels the same. I still like talking to him. We agree on a lot of things and when we don't he is always respectful, he isn't one of those guys who starts shitting on you and demeaning you. And he doesn't enable me either! He's supportive of my mental health struggles and that I'm trying but he also pointed a lot of stuff out to me when I was spending time with him, like telling me I smoke way too much (his exact phrasing was "herb addled") and said I need to cut down for my health 🥺 and like lmao we got stoned and took a 3am walk to the 7/11 and he kind of, lol, stopped me from getting way too much food just because I had munchies, and also was trying to save me money because, you know, gas station food isn't always cheap

I dunno, he. Inspires me to be a better person. But I also recognize that even if we get along really well and have known each other for some time that I don't actually know a lot about him personally. Like I keep forgetting how old he is, I didn't know he had siblings, I only recently started finding out like his music tastes and such, idk. I want to learn more about him and share moments and things with him 🥺

We also just have a lot of really good conversations. Like it's weird we've just been able to talk so easily and so often without even knowing each other super personally which is the step that's coming now I guess?

I guess if I were to start listing things off about him that I like... He's very honest. I never have to be afraid he's secretly thinking something different; he's an open communicator, albeit a little blunt at times but he jokingly often refers to that as 'a side effect of the 'tism' but it's helpful you know? He doesn't mince words? Like he told me straight up that I tend to ramble sometimes because I'm insecure of the silence and that's totally correct. He encourages me to get away from my mom and kind of just my family in general, encourages me to be more of my own person. Like there have been so many many MANY conversations over the years and recently too where I'm just kind of venting to him and he gives me not just support but feedback, it's not just all "wow that sucks sorry to hear" but also "that's tough but it is a challenge you can overcome". There are so many times where I don't trust my own judgment and he's gone "no you didn't deserve that, that was really shitty, you didn't do anything wrong"

He's so smart 🥰 he's one of those guys that you go to tell him about something and he already knows, and also probably knows more than you do. He's getting a degree in botany or horticulture of some kind (his grades are so good too, he's shown me his like report card whatever, I'm so proud) and he's very avid and passionate about the environment and like, "being the change you want to see in the world". Like I loved going to his house and seeing all his gorgeous plants which he takes care of so meticulously and he knows all their scientific names and stuff. He grows succulents, man. Bitches love succulents

He's good at figuring out what he wants and working towards that goal. Hes good at regulating and setting boundaries on things that might be detrimental, like after I came back from the visit, he let me know that he was going to start turning his phone off at certain hours because of school now that jos break was over, he usually let's me know when he's going to bed so I'm not hanging on for a reply or anything. He's actually trying to distance from certain forms of like social media and online content because he thinks there's way too much stuff that's frivolous now and like, that can sometimes sound vaguely douchey but I actually totally agree? Like the amount of time I spend on my phone is insane and I know I'm wasting so much time on bullshit and I wish I could take control like he can

So uh, the uh, the night we had sex, right. I was going to use a rideshare service and no one was available and it was like 3am. And I was sitting there and he was saying "no I'm not going to let you try and walk out there at night it's not safe" and being caring like that and i just started crying and he started to hold me, like I was sitting in the couch and he was standing and he just hunched down to hold me because that was what I needed. I started apologizing, that I always felt like he's having to take care of me, that I hate being such a burden, and he soothed all those worries and just, kept holding me. He actually sat down on the couch next to me so he could hold me for a while as I just sobbed, squeezing me really tight, rocking me back and forth until I calmed down, which I eventually did, and it kind of came to the topic of where to sleep, and he says something like "it would be a lot easier to hold you if we were both lying down" which, was kind of going to be implied anyways. I kind of knew going up there we were probably going to get physical haha. But he wasn't bringing it up in a crazy way, you know? And when he was going into his bedroom and I kind of hesitated because I was nervous, he kind of, gave me this pause and this look like he was asking if I was coming but it was ok if I didn't, you know? He made sure I was OK, and I was. And we just lied in his bed cuddling as I sniffled and we just started talking about all sorts of stuff and, yeah

I mean. The sex itself was. Like. It's. Not to be cheesy but it was genuinely how I always wanted my first time to be, although this was my second time and the first was so icky we ain't gonna talk about it lmao. Perfect communication, asking how i felt, if I had any feedback, was there anything specific I wanted to do WHICH HE DID BTW fjfjgngjg. Like I felt SO comfortable and safe. I even got a little bold with him in ways that literally light my face on fire but it was because I trusted him so much. Like literally there was a point where he said I could do whatever I wanted to him and you know what I did? I started massaging his hand and arm where his injury is, I had him lay on his tummy so I could massage his back, because I wanted him to feel better, like ever since I hears he was injured I was wanting to try and help him like that 🥺

There were points where we were just, cuddling naked, just peaceful, feeling the warmth of each other's skin. I was the little spoon AND the big spoon and he'd be resting his head on my chest or tummy and I'd just be running my fingers through his hair and he also makes these little groaning noises when something feels good so it's like he purrs a little bit 🥰 and I mean. There was definitely some spice too but idk how comfortable you guys are in hearing those parts. Like for example there were a few times I kept accidentally bringing up my mom or rambling to be anxious and he would just silence me with a kiss because he knew I was anxious and shit. Or uh. Haha. He was kind of a biter so at some point he's trying to get an answer out of what something I would like to try was and I was being too shy so he just starts BITING ME like not hard but in a "ooo stop don't do that omg 🥰" kind of way until I came out and said it (and he did do it, quite enthusiastically too 🥵)

We talked a lot about my relationship with my mom and one of his biggest pieces of advice was something like "your mom is shitty for sure but the way you are holding on to your anger is making things worse. You're getting bent out of shape over very small things at this point and you're only stressing yourself out, you need to let some of that rage go and move on". He's actually been studying aspects of Buddhism and tries to incorporate some of those aspects into his life which o also really like, he also burned incense in his room which had a nice smell 🥰

I. I dont know. Like I fully recognize I need to spend more time with him and get to know him more before I make any significant decisions but. My heart is such a mess. Even if it's unhealthy or weird I know I feel. Even if it's temporary. Even if it's because I'm a freak. Nothing has to be said or done now. I just want to see him. Spend time with him. Support him. Recently he had an incident with a girl he liked and was talking to and spending time with and he invited her to spend time with him and she suddenly said "you make me uncomfortable" and gave him a really bad depressive episode? And he said during our visit, "yeah I'm gonna keep trying but next time it falls through I'm giving up on dating apps" and like. Last night I was thinking... if it's making him feel so depressed and alone... I would completely humiliate myself just to soothe him. I'd tell him I love him and how much he means to me and say "even if you don't want me, even if I'll never be that person for you, I want you to know you're capable of making people feel this way and you're worthy of love and even if it isn't me I know you'll find someone someday because youre smart and caring and responsible and wonderful"

And I mean... that's love isn't it? 🥺

[melis-writes]

Hi Mel,I hope you are okay 💕

İ remember once you said that you never watched TGF 3 , it's my favorite part (I feel like I'm the only person in this planet who loves part 3 more than the first two ,maybe because I love the 90s pacino)

Spoiler alert

he divorced Kay in this part,she even married another one but I forgot his name but he was American, there was a part where an Italian song was playing, idk its name but it reminded Michael of apollonia, he even died in Sicily in the exact same place she died

"She was wonderful, beautiful. I loved her. And then she died. My trusted bodyguard planted a bomb in my car. She drove it before I did", that's what michael said, "I loved her" , I'm not saying he didn't love Kay or anything,he asked Kay for forgiveness and they admitted they still love each other, he loved both her and apollonia, even in the ending there was sequence that shows Michael dancing with three women he loved, Mary, Kay and apollonia, he first danced with his daughter, then his first wife, then finally kay

like i said before, I love him with both Kay and apollonia

I'm surprised that no one brought this in any conversation about Michael, maybe he actually loved her, unlike the books

Anyway, it's my opinion, I even brought evidence, it's your choice if you think he loved her or not,TGF stans always have this Kay, apollonia fight anyways

(sorry if it was long, also I live in turkey, there's a time difference so you're probably asleep 😂)

Have a nice day💕💕

🌹🌹🌹

Hellooooo! ❤️ Yes, I’ve never watched TGF3 and never will (😂) but I’ve read it’s synopsis and my friends who’ve taken one for the team and watched it have explained everything in it to me. 👀 I think it’s very interesting Part III is your favourite!! That would be the first time I’ve heard someone say that and of course, there’s nothing wrong with that. 🫶🏻

I know I shit on the film a lot but pls, I don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea; I’m not being hateful or judging anyone for enjoying TGF3, Apollonia + Michael, etc, I just love hyperanalyzing my favourite thing ever (The Godfather 😅) and putting my opinion out there. If you know me, you know I absolutely LOVE TGF2 to no end. ❤️‍🔥

If we take a look at the ending of TGF2, the last scene, a good 10+ years has passed. Michael’s hair is greying, he’s most likely in his 50s then, but he still wears Kay’s wedding ring. I suspect during Mama Corleone’s funeral times that their divorce was in motion but Michael didn’t move on. He wore the wedding ring for over a decade still, even though Kay did move on.

I feel Kay had to do what was right for her and her children. She gets so much slander for this because we see her doing it in Part II already. She, or Anthony and Mary could have gotten killed the night of the attempted assassination. While dealing with Michael’s lies spanning 7+ years, his criminality continuing, false promises and now Kay and her children’s life literally being in danger, the best thing for Kay to do for Michael was call him out on how their family was falling apart and life was getting dangerous.

The nasty rhetoric against Kay complains she did what was right for her, the children, AND Michael really. You caused so much damage for a decade that you’re losing your family now and yes, Michael deserves this because he didn’t deserve Kay OR Apollonia—in my opinion. Did Kay deserve to spend the rest of her life alone and in misery? Hell no!! Michael needed to realize he lost her because of his OWN actions. She practically told him! 😭

But I’m not disregarding Apollonia’s importance to Michael—not at all. The Sicily arc was impactful but it becomes laughable when I hear that Apollonia (a literal teenager more interested in the money and freedom Michael gave her) changed the trajectory of his life. The book details Michael always had that ruthlessness, coldness and cruelty in him. He joined the family business and knew whether he was exiled to Sicily or not that he could never go back and was neck deep in the mafia the moment he pulled that trigger on Sollozzo and McClusky.

I see the death of Michael in Sicily as purely symbolic. He is Sicilian after all. We see Vito come from the Sicilian countryside, leave, and Michael return there alone and miserable.

As for the quote about Apollonia that Michael said, the “loved” word I don’t see as genuine. Especially because it’s not canon, and personally I’m a canon girl when it comes to media I enjoy and love. Sure he “loved” her but didn’t love her, not like he loved Kay. Could he have if their relationship developed over time, they returned to the USA, and Apollonia actually showed a shred of interest like attraction or love to Michael in return (let’s be honest… nobody talks about Apollonia not returning any feelings back to Michael for some reason.)

The three most important women in Michael’s life is of course Kay, his daughter Mary and Apollonia. Apollonia was definitely important, but Kay was a lot more important and impactful to Michael’s life. Those two were really in love. Otherwise why would Michael go find her again and say:

"You were all that I loved and valued most in the world and now I'm losing you...I've lost you anyway; You're gone and it was all for nothing. You need to understand that I had a whole different destiny planned for us."

“I love you, Kay. Don't dread me, anymore. You know, every night here in Sicily, I dream about my wife and my children. And how I lost them."

The important thing is that analyzing and giving our opinions on characters, themes, anything is great and can be fun when it’s done respectfully. 💗 I’m all about that! I’ve seen Kay and Apollonia Stans fight/argue and… Yeah, I’m definitely not having any part of that. I just think it’s interesting to see someone’s POV, then agree to disagree in a mature, kind way. I’m not gonna fight over fictional characters personally 💀 but I really appreciate your input and opinion!! 👀👀