#idk sometimes they get really clear and it freaks me out

[maudiemoods]

Ok not cool why am I hearing voices

[bangcakes]

.

[capaldiera]

man idgaf about what treville and richelieu have going on (mostly nothing) (they dont like each other but they work together a lot bc of their jobs.) (i guess treville holding onto a sense of honour whilst working with the cardinal is interesting but like that's not. thats not really those two having something interesting going on). lets talk about the king and the cardinal man.

[iactuallykissedsharawheeler]

⭑⌗ 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐋𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐄 𝐇𝐂𝐒 + 𝐟𝐞𝐦 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

✶ let's go ahead and clear that idea that ellie wouldn't be like. immediately obsessed with you and giving you secret discounts on the weed.

✶ she met you five seconds ago and she was like. why would she ever pay for anything?? she's literally my reason for breathing?? (ok babe 😭) so you're getting that stuff for lowest price she can possibly make it. and if you flirt a little?? she's wondering why she's not just handing you the bag for free.

✶ when you guys get closer, she notices you're kinda into pink so when she sees pink papers???? she's SLAMMING that card, best believe. when you're freaking and like HOWD YOU GET THIS she's trying to pretend to be all cool like oh idk just found 'em and thought it'd be funny but if you like 'em you can have them ... i guess 😒

✶ if you're a little inexperienced with it she's a little protective and is like oh i don't think you should try that this one's way better and gives it to you on the house like?? you're trying to pay for it and she's like noooo it's for you just take it even though that was some of her good weed and she never gives that out. but you're nice and sweet and her bestest customer so who is she to charge you??

✶ when y'all are closer she literally just starts buying shit for you. you're like oh my gosh this bracelet is literally so pretty and next time you come over she's like so.. guess what and there's the bracelet in a box under two pretty pre-rolls (that she's also not letting you pay for btw)

✶ n you're so worried about breaking her bank when she does it but she's literally living lavish because she's everyone's dealer and no one with weed isn't getting it from her. (charismatic queen tbh)

✶ plus if you think this is gonna kill her wallet just wait until you guys start actually dating. she's not even waiting for you to ask for shit, she's telling you to put your cart on public so she can surprise you all the time.

✶ you're like babe how am i gonna pay you back and she's like just .. be pretty for me, yeah? 's not hard for you at all. (just flustered myself give me a minute)

✶ and some random things i just think she'd do:

✶ texting you high out of her mind about dinosaur facts because she just knows too much and needs to get it out immediately (she's such a nerd I love it 😭)

✶ trying to shotgun with you but she sees your face lookin' all pretty n dazed, chokes on the smoke, and just simply never does it after that. (give her a week, she'll be back)

✶ reading a shit ton of sci-fi. she compulsively reads savage starlight all the time but she's actually obsessed with the whole genre n can't exist without it atp (she DEFINITELY owns a few space cowboy books and before meeting you she would always imagine she was the lead guy with the hot love interest who was definitely some kind of alien. don't question it.)

✶ if you're a plushie girlie (me fr) she's ALWAYS buying you plushies. but she always buys one that matches yours for herself so you guys are "always together" or something. idk she's a little bit of a loser.

✶ she's so bad at keeping up with skincare but now she just weaponises that and makes you do it for her. literally rolling her eyes and pouting if you do yours without her, mumbling shit like "oh yeah, just forget about ellie, huh? that's what they all do" until you're like babe what??? 😭

✶ also i know that everyone says this but she really does own some weird ass shirts 😭😭 she'll get high and buy weird shit like that shirt that just says tomatoes it's so wild going through her closet lmaoo

✶ and because of her high shopping she also has some weird ass bongs like. seriously. there's a an astronaut one with octopus legs for sure, i can feel it.

✶ high ellie tweets>> she's actually so out of pocket sometimes 😭 some of her greatest hits would probs be

✶ also she was so nervous around you and wouldn't look you in the eye for too long because she didn't wanna scare you but then she got a little bold when she found out you liked girls and then was just straight up cocky when she realised you liked her, too (that blunt flick when dina said she wanted her to kiss her .. yeah that ellie)

✶ she's just the bestest, silliest, nerdiest girl ever and the best girlfriend literally anyone could ask for 💞💞

hey guys back with another banger hope you guys enjoyed make sure to like follow and subscribe‼️ no but seriously give me opinions because i love hearing you guys have little convos and the reposts are always so wild 😭😭 thank you new jersey, and goodnight (also don't look at the tags im shy) as alwaysss creds to @ cafekitsune bc these dividers are so mf cute

[kurosstuff]

Hello, how are you doing? :)

Since requesrts are open and your writing is marvelous, I wanted to request an Azula x gn reader oneshot/fic where reader is a childhood friend who grew distant to Azula over time, but is now chosen to be her fiancé in an arranged marriage.

You don't have to write it, but I still hope you likr the idea!

Have a great day ^^

Hi! I'm doing better at least! Thank you so much♡ It means so much to me to hear you like my writing!

I'd like to apologize for not writing this sooner- was taking a break with long fics- and idk how accurate azula is still- haven't watched fhe show in so long-! Also hope I got Ozai ok? Never wrote anything with him in it before I don't think

-

I got carried away♡.. this came out as more of a reconnection type thing? Eh- maybe that's good?

Summary: read ask♡

Warnings(?): azula being azula, reader freaks out/panics alot, ozai, soft(?) Azula(she's like kinda nice sometimes); slight angst. Misunderstanding(but not really), friends to strangers to lovers(?), both reader AND azula are oblivious on how they really feel,

Azula x G/N reader: arranged

Being azulas friend had its ups and downs

Mostly downs

"Oh, come on, Y/N. Don't such a kid, " Azula grumbled, trying to get you to stay still. She read a trick where if someone still stays, a firebender can hit the target above the person's head without any injury. In a book for children for whatever reason. "I'd never hurt you," which is partly true - Azula wouldn't hurt you on purpose, or she would - you weren't actually sure

But like time- friendships come and go.

As you grew older, you saw how awful of a person Azula was turning out to be. How cruel of a person she truly was - how little care she had for another being - even her own brother. Seeing how she was amused and not concerned for her brother during the Agni Kai- you decided enough was enough.

This 'friendship' was becoming too dangerous too frightening. You were aware you can't just up and end the friendship you decided to distance yourself from her. Feeling confident, she wouldn't notice the change

-

You weren't sure if she ever noticed- if by chance she did. She never said or gave the indication she knew. After a couple of months, you stopped coming around to hang out.

You felt bad, but you believed this was for the best.

It's been almost a three full year when you received the letter. One you'd overlook if it weren't for the very specific golden charm closing the envelope showing it was from the royal family. Usually, being given this letter is either an honor or.. something much worse. Swallowing down your nerves, you sat down staring at the envelope for almost an eternity. Opening it carefully, you begain to read.

Everything seemed normal in the letter besides the fact you are to be summoned to the Fire Lord himself for something. Totally normal. Not like your gonna die or anything. Be shipped off to war maybe? You'd 100% are not worried.

Nope.

-

Rushing to get ready, you practically jumped in the air in Fright when you heard the knocking on the door. Your nerves were shot, and this whole thing was just making it worse.

You almost hoped to not see her there. But that'd be impossible since she lived there. Opening the door two guards stood infront of you looking at you sternly.

"Are you Y/N?" Nodding your head yes- you didn't trust your voice at the moment. They turned and gestured to follow "come. We will escort you to the Palace"

-

You don't remember anything on the way there - it was all a blur - you blame it on your nerves, but it did help distract from the imitating Palace. Until you got there. The two guards stepped out and opened the door for you - following them the huge door to the Palace opened slowly with a creek. You took a deep breath and stepped in- turning you watched as the doors closed, sealing your fate. Locking you in - A sound of someone clearing their throat caught your attention

"This way," following closely, you dared not speak, not trusting your voice - and for the fact your throat was so dry a word couldn't get out when if you wished it.

Being led by two fully armed guards was almost as unnerving as the lack of decorations in the halls leading to the Fire Lords office. It was devoid of anything to show the human side of him - if there was any. The only lights shown were from flames - obviously, one's from the Fire Lord himself probably made. The only sounds you could hear was the sound of your heart beating harshly in your ears and the metal taps of the swords on the guards.

Stopping in front of huge double doors, they turned to you unblinking. "He's inside." Was all they said before they opened the doors for you. Once you stepped in they shut loudly the candles blowing out closest to you leaving you alone in the dark- minus the glow of flamed down the hall. Clenching your hands you took a deep breath and tried to relax-

The closer you got to the flames- the more the urge to run as far as you could got worse- alarm bells ringing in your head at the thought of this all going wrong. Something practically 100% possible. Even on his good days, he would be cruel. Stopping in front of the flame wall blocking you from the full view of the man himself - Fire Lord Ozai. His face covered in the shadows from how he sat, but the flames didn't hide how terrifyingly huge he looked - bowing in respect you were about to great him- before he put his hand up to stop you

"Do you know why I asked you here?"

It took you a moment to gain the courage to respond - surprisingly, he allowed you the moment - as if he thought you actually knew the reason. "No, Fire Lord Ozai. I do not. " A deep hum was all you got in return - fabric moved, glancing up, you gulped.

He stood up.

Walking towards you, the flames moved, almost glinding out of his way like a door - he stood before you. Moving his hand in a gesture, you understood to stand straight up , your eyes cast away in respectfear. Walking around you in a circle.

Like a predator hunting his prey. He stood in front of you again after a moment. "Yes. You are perfect." The odd complaint from him did nothing to ease you - seeing your confusion, he hummed."There's an arrangement. Obviously, your Father never told you." The look you held did nothing to stop him,"the arrangement was. His firstborn was to marry my firstborn." The words he spoke caused a mixed sense of emotions in you- confusion, anxiousness. And fear from what was your next thought.

His firstborn was banished.

"But. Giving the events that unfolded with my firstborn. The agreement changed a bit. You will marry my second born."

Clicks of footsteps echoed behind you. You didn't dare look behind you.

"You are to marry my daughter- Azula. Whom I was made aware you were friends of sorts." Turning away, he walked back to his throne. "You will be Wed in two months."

Behind you, someone cleared their throat, turning around, and froze. Azula stood arms crossed, staring at you - almost glaring from how narrowed her eyes were. The same smug smirk from years ago is still present. She almost didn't seem to change much but all the more terrifying. Even if deep down you were happy to see her

"Well. Hello Y/N, " she spoke, voice coming out in a condescending purr. "It seems like we have some catching up to do." Turning, she gestured you to follow her

-

You followed Azula to her room. You've been in it once before, but that was years ago. Before you felt comfortable - now you felt uneasy - tense about the whole thing. Standing far away from the bed but close enough, you looked around the room - it looks the same as it did, but with some added things such as plants and a new dresser replacing the old silver one she used to own.

Azula sat on her bed, pulling some books out to go through every once in a while, looking up at you - face unreadable. Shows how much has changed before you could tell what she was thinking even if she wouldn't show it - now it's like she's a new person - and in a way, she is.

"What's the matter with you?" Azula asked(more like demanded), looking over at her- Azula seemingly growing frustrated at the books in her hands- what about you weren't sure. Turning towards you with eyebrow raised an annoyed look on her face. You haven't answered her yet

"Oh- uh, nothing. Why?" Humming she placed the book down on her lap- gesturing towards the bed. Getting the message you sat down on the edge. She sat silent for a moment before sighing.

"Look." She started after a while. She took a second to think her response through - it was an odd sight. Azula glanced at you- raising an eyebrow at the unnerved state you were in. Standing up, she walked to her counter. "I get it. The situation we're in is weird. " Pulling some object out, she turned to face you. Handing it to you. It looked like a squishy turtle duck

Seeing the confusion on your face when you took it, she sighed, facing away from you once the look of realization hit you. "You always needed something to hold to calm down when you got like this." She spoke, sitting down beside you. Turning it around the squish toy was the same one you were given- and forgot about years ago. When you and Azula were close. The same accidental burn mark on the shell of the toy. You still remember how she gave it too you

-

Sitting on the bench, you held your hurt, burning hand crying. Clutching them close - you knew you shouldn't have let Azula talk you into doing such a trick.

A dangerous trick - yet she did. And here you sat hurt.

And alone.

Hurried footsteps came from behind you - you knew those footsteps. Sitting upright, you used your uninjured hand to whip the tears away harshly. You didn't want to give Azula another reason to tease you.

"There you are" she spoke. Sitting next to you she held something behind her. Face slightly flushed from either embarrassment or what you didn't know- nor gave it much thought once a toy was shoved in your face "here- I. I heard from the towns people that a thing called a 'squishy' helps calm people down. Brings comfort or whatever. So take it. It's yours" Holding it in your hand you smiled tearfully. Azula looked like she practically softened before she turned to your hand- huffing she gestured for it

"we need to clean this."

-

The memory brought a happy smile to your face. Looking up, you saw the quick look of relief on Azulas face before it hardened. "..you kept it?" A shrug was all you got in response for a moment

"Of course I did." Azula mumbled before clearing her throat, brushing you off without a word. Turning away from you - Azula was silent as you messed with the squishy in your hand. Turning towards you, she opened her mouth before shutting it. This caused to pause - Azula never hesitates, nor does she stop until she gets what she wants. Somethings wrong

Before you could ask, a knock came at the door. After giving permission, a maid came in bowing, "My lady, your training room is ready for you." A wave of her hand and the maid ran off hurriedly down the hall.

"You're coming with me." Azula spoke standing. She walked to the door, glancing back at you - an eyebrow arched. Obviously she was waiting for you to follow. Trying to swallow your nerves you jumped up putting the squish on the bed before turning to follow Azula.

The walk was quiet

-

Entering the training room a couple test dummies stood around the room. Arms stretched out like you used to see from the target practice dummies you'd come acrossed before.

"Sit there- I'll be back" Azula pointed towards some benches a bit far off- you sighed- it's better to just let her do what she says half the time anyways.

After you sat on the bench, Azula moved to the changing room. Her mind jumbled. Scattered around, and she couldn't think of a good reason as to why. Pacing back and forth, she clenched her jaw angrily

Azula was panicking on the inside - ever since she found out it was you, she was to marry. Even worse when she saw you. Would she be a horrible wife? Be like her father and treat her spouse horribly to the point of another abandonment? No. She won't be like him. Azula refuses to treat the one she's bound to in such a way - even Azula isn't that cruel of a person. She's not soft - she's not kind either. She knows the reason why you left her even if you didn't say.

It was her fault

Learning the first choice of who you were originally gonna be married to didn't help her feel good at all. Did you know you were gonna marry her brother? That you left cause of that? The selfish, selfish side of Azula prayed that was the real reason you left. She knows it's not, but it's just easier to think

She wants to prove that she's the best choice - the only choice. Of course, the arranged part of the marriage didn't make her feel happy made her feel horrible. If you were to marry her, she'd want it to be of your free will - not be forced.

Azula stopped pacing. What? Why is that the thing she's focused on. Blinking she crossed her arms. Of course the thought of someone being forced to marry her set an uneasy feeling inside her, but. The thought of marrying you wasn't bad at all-

Why is that? It makes no sense why Azula was and still is hung up on a loss of a friend. The loss of you since the beginning was horrible. It made her sick- she'd admit it only to herself now that she missed you- but.. why does she feel relief from the thought of marrying you? Was it cause she knew you?

Shaking her head she quickly got dressed

-

Fiddling with your thumbs, you glanced around the room - thankfully, in a more relaxed mood. Your heart no longer felt like leaping out of your chest. The whole area was spotless- which wasn't a surpise given how certain people would react to a messy training hall. You shuddered at the memory.

Looking over when the door opened, your face flushed a bit. Azula was already looking your way when she came out. Without a word, she stepped up and moved the dummies a bit before she begins she started to stretch. Standing straight she smirked back at you.

"Keep those eyes on me," she begain her training. Hitting the dummies far back with a punch in the air- blue flames came out in a flicker illuminating her air and passing some of the training dummies closest- but surprisingly never touching them. Only hitting her target

It wasn't much of a surpise on how good of a fighter Azula was- but you can't help but you can't help but still be surprised at how well she can control her flames. You've seen fire benders fight and train before, this wasn't the first- but it was the first seeing just how different she was to the others. If anyone else tried this. Tried to hit the target from the farthest to the front. 100% the flames passing the others would be hit and burned, but for Azula- it was like it never touched.

The more she hit and kicked, the more in awe you were in watching. If anything, it looked like a dance you'd see from how fluent and confident Azula moved to attack.

As quick as she began, the training ended. Azula walked towards you, and she didn't even break a sweat- even her hair was kept in place even though she was hitting and kicking. Standing infront of you she crossed her arms almost smirking. "Well?" She spoke with an eyebrow raised

"You were perfect! How did you even do that?"

"I'm a natural. No trouble at all" Azula spoke smugly- she wasn't gonna tell you how long it took for her to get the attack right when she was younger. Everything needs to be perfect. Azula hummed, interrupting your praise for a moment. "..We added more flowers to the garden. I'll show you" she spoke almost oddly. The praise you gave her felt weird- but it filled her ego. Of course it was perfect.

This was Azula

Nothing less than perfect no matter what.

She turned to leave to redress ignoring your call.

"We'll go once I come back"

-

The garden wasn't totally different from how it was since the last time you saw it. The tree in the middle has grown much older but still hanging strong - a knew bench was placed near it, giving the tree and pond underneath. The sun hitting perfectly in-between the leafs and from the rocks below made it have almost a glow to it.

Looking around, the bushes nearby were cut in the specific square way the Fire Lord himself seemed to prefer rather than the rounded ones. Stopping once you heard quaking noises. A smile came over your face, walking to the center pond. You knelt down, looking at the turtle ducks

"Here. You can feed them if you'd like" Azula spoke, holding a small bag of bread out. Thanking her you took it and started to break them up. Azula watched her eyes softening at the sight.

Azula couldn't put her finger on what was wrong with her. Was it her nerves? Why does this scene in front of her make her feel off? The way you're kneeling in front of the turtle ducks the way you gently fed them. The way the lowering sub hits your face. Blinking, she scowled, looking away from you. Looking out to the pond on the other side

"Do you want to feed one, Azula?" Not getting a response, you looked over, frowning at what you saw.

Azula looked almost troubled by something. "Azula?" Calling out to her gave no help. It was like she was here but not here at the moment. Calling out to her again in a softer tone to not startle her- she blinked at you slowly before registering where she was. Standing up, you watched her closely

"Azula. Are you ok?"

Azula just nodded slowly. A moment passes before she bits her tongue. A question on the tip of her tongue. She doesn't want to ask. But she has to. She needs to if she really wants to not be like her father. Not in this way at least

"Are we still friends?" Azula asked before she could stop. "Like I know this is an arrangement but. Are we?"

You didn't responded right away. Just stood there thinking. The way she looked at you- you couldn't tell what she was thinking. It was like looking at a new person. Slowly nodding your head "yes we are." You bit your lip in thought "can we have a do over? From how things ended-" it was a selfish thing to ask. To pretend you didn't just disappear from her life.

Azula nodded her head

"Then.. we can start over?" You said, looking away from Azula for a moment - turning back to look at her - her gaze was on the pond in front of you both.

"Don't see why not. We're not getting married for a couple of months, so we have time"

[gasolinerainbowpuddles]

Jizz Fingers║ ⓞⓝⓔⓢⓗⓞⓣⓢ

|| ꂵꍏꀤꈤ ꂵꍏꌗ꓄ꍟꋪ꒒ꀤꌗ꓄ || | PAIRING(s): alien!Joel x reader

| RATING: explicit material | 18+ | WORD COUNT: 3.2k | CONTENT: This is a crackfic. Joel is not Joel. He’s an alien that can shapeshift and isn’t into the splorgimums on their own planet. He wants to nut in you with his creampie fingers. It’s not supposed to make sense. It’s not supposed to be anything but fun and sexy and silly. It’s meta. It’s tongue-in-cheek. It’s self-indulgent. If you’re not into that kinda thing then idk what to tell ya, bud. 

| SYNOPSIS: u get creampied by a dick finger alien Joel Miller.

The sonorous silver ship glided above you before descending gently into a large clearing in the field ahead. Bright light flooded your vision as a hidden door pushed away from the spacecraft and revealed an occupant.

It appeared to have an amorphous, fluid corporeal form, but no matter the shape it always remained an off-white greenish gray color. Six large onyx orbs were situated near the top of the form. You assumed they must be eyes or some other sort of organ. When the greenish grey flaps snapped together and apart a few times in quick succession, you realized they were in fact lidded eyes.

A warbled voice sounded inside your mind. “Do not be afraid. I come in peace, and I stand before you with no intention of harming you.”

You realize the creature is speaking to you through your own mind.

You should be afraid, but instead you’re just fascinated and exhilarated. You aren’t sure why they’d say the same thing twice, though, just in a slightly different way. You also aren’t sure if you should respond in your head, out loud, or at all.

“That’s kinda a weird thing to say. Like, you said it twice,” you point out, speaking loudly and clearly enough that the creature can hear you.

At least, you think they can hear you. You don’t see any ears. Then again, they possess the capability of telepathic speech, and there must be some equivalent to hearing for that. You try to think what that is called or what that might be called when the creature shifts back and forth but still doesn’t approach.

“Those were two separate statements,” the voice in your mind contends firmly.

“Huh?” you ask. You’re sure you sound dumb, but you were never really going to be a match for a higher level intelligent being anyways.

“When I bust, it is peaceful for every being involved. I also greet you with good intentions,” the voice patiently clarifies.

Suddenly you are standing no more than arm’s length away from the being. “I saved your achilles the trouble,” the voice in your mind said, as if it was some huge favor.

“My achilles is fine,” you grumble awkwardly. “I know I should hit leg day more, but sometimes it’s just so–”

“Our sex organs are complimentary,” the voice interrupts. “We could perform the Divine Dance, if you’d like.”

You wanted to ask why they had to come all the way to Earth just to get laid, but you think better of it.

“The splorgimums on my planet just don’t get me,” the voice explains. You realize you said your thought aloud.

“Oh. Uh, okay. S-Sorry about that. I, uh, didn’t mean to offen–”

The creature waves a gelatinous blob arm dismissively. “No offense taken. You’re not like other splorgimums. I can tell. You’re different,” it assures you.

You feel a blush creep onto your cheeks. “Oh. Well, uh–” an awkward giggle “—thank you. But I’m not really that special, here on Earth I mean. There are other women who are wayyyyyy more attractive. Oh! I know! You should try driving by Doja Cat’s house because oh my god she is so. fucking. fine. Like, if I had her in that I’m A Cow Bitch Moo costume for 5 minutes I’d—”

“No. No Doja Kitties. Only you.”

You shrug and accept their obsession with you.

“Okay. So now what? I don’t know where your Divine Dance hole is, and your floating blobs are sort of freaking me out,” you admit.

You keep tabs on the hovering goops that orbit the creature. They remind you of the time you tried to make Key Lime Jello Shots for your uncle’s cousin’s dog’s recital but added too much vodka.

“I can take the form of something pleasing to you. An earth male, perhaps? The female of your species is more difficult to capture as they are far superior.”

“So fuckin’ true,” you agree. “But, hhmmmm, a male specimen? I mean, I hate all men, but Pedro Pascal seems pretty decent. Maybe you could turn into Joel Miller? You know, from The Last of Us?”

The creature nods — you think it’s a nod — and transforms into Joel. Game Joel.

“Oh, uh, look, Pixel Daddy is fine as hell, especially in part 2, but I meant the HBO adaptation of the game. Please,” you correct.

“How’s this?” Pedro’s version of Joel’s voice asks aloud.

Your pussy bottoms out. “Oh, fuck yeah.”

You disrobe completely as you enter the spacecraft.

“I set it to 72º Fahrenheit. Is that a suitable climate for your meat suit?” Joel asks.

“Yeah, that’s perfect. Mr. Alien, could you, like, put more of the twang into his voice? And use words like he does?  Like, how he sounds on the show? You know what, let’s watch a few clips to get it right.”

You pull up your account on your phone, but it takes you a minute to find it because you forgot they changed it from HBO Max Go to just Max. “So fuckin’ stupid. Purple is a better color than blue anyway,” you mumble to yourself as you pull up an episode.

The galactic creature uses some magical time skip thing to binge the entire series and gets a yucky smudge of goop on your phone screen when it attempts to find season 2.

“There’s just one season? Please tell me there’s another one,” Joel implores.

“Yeah, there’s a second season, but it’s not out yet,” you inform him.

“Damn. But you said there’s two games already? So what happens in the second game?” he asks.

“You know what, we super don’t need to get into that right now. Let’s see what you’re working with,” you quickly change the subject and grab at his crotch.

He grunts in approval. “Needy lil thing, aren’t’cha? You want my cock, baby?”

Your eyes narrow suspiciously. “Did you use a time jump thing to read a whole bunch of Joel Miller smutfic on Tumblr?”

Joel blushes and scratches the back of his neck. “Eh, mighta read a few.”

“Oh my god, you’re gonna be super nasty and dominant, aren’t you?” you sigh.

“Only if that’s what you want, baby. I’m a consent king,” he assures you.

“Well, alright then. I want you to rawdog me and slap my ass, okay?”

He smirks and pulls you close. “I’ll give ya what I give ya, and you just gotta take it,” he grunts into your neck as he nibbles and sucks downward.

You gasp at the sensation and grind your hips into him. “Oh fuck, Joel,” you whine. “I want you to wreck me, please!”

“Gonna fill that cunt up,” he says gruffly as he gropes your ass and breasts.

“Yes, Daddy, please!” you beg.

He pauses for a moment and looks confused.

“Oh, uh, you must not have got to those kind of fics–” you cough awkwardly “–uh, anyway. Sorry. Joel. Yes, Joel, please.”

“I can sense the vibrations of your inner sex organ when you call me that. If it is sexually gratifying to you, I wholly welcome the use of it,” the original voice says inside your mind.

“Oh wow. I love that you’re not kink shaming me. Glad you didn’t make it to that side of Tumblr,” you huff in a laugh.

Joel suddenly pins you against the wall and presses his hard, clothed cock against your bare skin. Even through the denim you can tell he’s huge. Apparently all those fic writers were right all along.

“Who’s gonna fill up that pretty cunt uh’yours, huh?” he demands as he grabs the back of your neck for leverage.

“Y-You, Daddy,” you say in an aroused tremble.

“That’s fuckin’ right. When my fat cock is inside you, I better hear you singin’ some thank you’s to Daddy for fillin’ you up so good,” he warns.

“Yes, Daddy, I’ll be your good girl,” you promise. 

He flips you around without warning and pushes your chest flush against the wall. 

“Even good girls need to be reminded every once in a while what happens if they don’t listen to Daddy,” he says in a low gruff.

His clothes have magically disappeared with the help of his alien outerspace boi powers. You feel him firm against your backside before a harsh slap of his palm replaces it. You jump and yelp in pain at the surprise spanking.

“Mmmm, pretendin’ you don’t want it, but I feel you pushin’ your ass back for more,” he taunts. 

You whine because he’s right. You can only imagine the derisive comments he’d make if he felt how wet you are. 

He lands another three harsh swats on the same patch of skin. Tears prickle up in your eyes. “D-Daddy,” you moan. 

“You gonna thank Daddy for keepin’ you in line, baby?” Another swat. It stings so much you know there must be an imprint of his hand clearly outlined by your welting red flesh.

“Thank you, Daddy!” you choke out. “Th-Thank you for k-keeping me your good girl and not letting me b-be bad, Daddy. I only wanna be good for you, Daddy!” you wail.

“That’s what I like’tuh hear, baby,” he grunts into your ear. “Ask Daddy to make you into his own little cocksleeve. Ask Daddy to give you this big, fat cock.”

You whimper as he slips his length between your folds and rubs back and forth in teasing passes. 

“Daddy, I want you to use my pussy. I need it so bad. Please. I just wanna be your cocksleeve. Use my holes, Daddy,” you whimper.

You barely finish your sentence when he flips you around again and lines himself up with your entrance. Apparently the alien creature was just as into this as you are because their altered form reverted back to the amorphous gray green blob. You’re way too horny to be picky about it right now, so you squeeze your eyes shut. You forgot to charge your vibrator, anyway.

Their penis was more like fingers that kinda moved around randomly. You don’t know. You’re not an astrophysicist or whoever it is that would best be knowledgeable about alien wieners.   

Its spongy gray appendage felt firm and slimy as it entered you. There was some sort of phantom connection to your mouth and throat as well, the sensation of its finger-penis dragging back and forth, able to be felt in both your pussy and your mouth. It was weird, but you knew if it was Joel Miller doing it then it would somehow become totally fine and very hot. 

“You’re getting too lost in the sauce,” you whine. “You’re in your true form again. Change back.”

“Mmmmm, sorry, baby,” came the familiar gravelly voice once more.

When you felt brave enough to open your eyes again, you saw those familiar Wreck-It-Ralph sausage fingers and sighed in relief. The alien had changed back to your preferred form of Joel Miller as portrayed  by José Pedro Balmaceda Pascal.

As much as you wanted to stare at his face, you also wanted him to dick you down through the floorboards of the ship. You wiggle to sink down onto your hands and knees. “Wanna be wide open for you, Daddy,” you pout.

He makes an approving growling noise and scrambles behind you, shoving you downward between your shoulder blades until your face is smushed into the floor. He makes no effort to warn you before slamming his entire length into you. The impact of his wide tip against your cervix is so forceful it punches the air out of your lungs. You let out a panicked, strangled moan, suddenly unsure if you were going to be able to take this dick like a champ.

Joel grabs your hips for leverage and starts pistoning rough, deep strokes into your drenched pussy. “Gaahh–Goddamn! Fuckin’ chokin’ it, honey,” he rasps in a labored voice. “Feel so fuckin’ tight for me.”

“It’s s-so big, Daddy. I dunno if I can take it,” you cry.

“You can take it. You can take it for Daddy. Be a good girl or m'gonna hafta punish you,” he cautions. As a reminder of what that might entail, he strikes your backside so hard your entire body jerks as you let out a sob.

A high pitched moan gathers in Joel’s throat as you start to accommodate his size. “Yeah, fuckin’ like that, huh? Like when Daddy spanks you? Makes ya listen?”

“You’re so good to me, Daddy!” you sob. Your arousal is practically dripping down your thighs. You listen to the hum of the engines mixing with the sounds of your drooling cunt being fed Joel’s massive cock over and over again. He grabs your wrists and pulls you upward, using your limbs like reins on a horse. You have no control over the depth of penetration in these positions, and Joel is opting for nothing less than utterly devastating your pussy.

“M’gonna give you these fingers, too, baby. Know you can take it,” he pants.

He releases your arms and lets you scramble to catch yourself before faceplanting.

“Hey! You could’ve at least–”

“Shut your fuckin’ mouth and take what Daddy gives you,” he snarls.

You whine and clench around him. You feel a boogery churro type object prodding at your asshole. You turn your head quickly enough to see the creature has let Joel’s arm halfway revert back into the wiggly blobby thing.

“Did I say you could turn around?” he barks. He spanks you again with his 100% Joel hand, hard enough that you know there are pinpricks of blood beginning to seep through.

“I’m sorry, Daddy!” you scream.

You feel him now inside both holes. It’s overwhelming and amazing. The phantom throat thing is back again, and you like how you gag even with an “empty” mouth.

“Got enough for every hole you got and then some, sweetheart,” he practically slurs. He sounds completely wrecked.

You feel your lower belly heating up and quickly tightening.

“Oh my fucking god, Joel. I’m getting so close,” you gasp.

“THAT AIN’T MY FUCKIN’ NAME WHEN I’M STUFFIN’ YOU WITH MY COCK, SWEETHEART,” he grits out as he wraps his hand around the front of your throat and squeezes.

When your breaths quickly become hard to take, you know you’re going to come soon.

“I want your space juice inside me, Daddy!” you cry out, not caring if you’re breaking the illusion. You still needed to be clear and consensual in your approach to this intimate exchange, and you needed to address the weird topic of whether or not your birth control could do effective hand to hand combat with spaceboi cum. 

“Our sexual organs are compatible, but our reproductive hormones and liquids are not,” the voice explained in your mind.

The Jim Carrey baby grinch was kinda cute, but you still felt better knowing you weren’t going to birth a little green gremlin alien baby. (Although you did think Victor or Clementine would be nice names.)

“Put a baby in me, Daddy! Fuck your baby into me!” you beg now that you know you can’t actually get pregnant. 

“Uh, I mean, there’s just so much pregnancy fic out there,” Joel hedges carefully, still maintaining his merciless thrusts. “You don’t really wanna make this into a whole thing do you? Ya know, with the pregnancy storyline and stuff? Some users have actually said they prefer—”

“No, Joel, I’m not actually—” you interrupt in a huff “—I’m just saying it to be sexy. It sounds sexy. Besides, there’s some fic writers who basically only write creampies but none of their characters ever seem to get pregnant. It’s kinda wild. There’s a fic writer I can think  of right now, actually. She loves creampies so much.”

“So she’s just really into pussy gettin’ drenched but nobody’s gotta deal with babies? Sounds like a pretty sweet deal if ya ask me,” he approves.

“Yeah, I think the only pregnancy fic she has is, like, this really nasty oneshot where the reader is already pregnant and she gets double teamed by Tommy and you at the same time. Oh and she lactates. I wasn’t into it at first, but it was kinda hot. Maybe you’ve read it? The author calls herself Puddles?”

“Oh, her? That Gasoline Rainbow lady? I thought she just made memes?” He sounds surprised and impressed. He’s hitting your cervix repeatedly with such force that you feel like your vagina is going to look like somebody dropped a tray of lasagna on a pubic hair linoleum floor.

“No, she actually has, like, legit fic on there, too. She’s, like, really talented. I can’t believe she doesn’t have more followers,” you laugh incredulously. 

You’re glad he doesn’t ask how you would know how many followers she has since that isn’t publicly available information. You hate it when plot holes have to be smoothed out nicely and still fit in with the story. It’s so boring and way too much work sometimes.

“Maybe stuff like alien jizz fingers is a little too much for people to–”

“Okay, this is getting too meta. Let’s just get back to you fucking me so rough I can’t walk right for an entire week, okay?”

“Hnngg, fuck yeah. Daddy’s gonna wreck this cunt,” he hisses as his thrusts pick up pace.

“DADDY, I’M GONNA COME,” you cry as you start clenching and seizing around the massive circumference of his cock.

Joel lets out a guttural, choked moan as he empties inside you. You can feel it from his weird creampie fingertips, too — even the invisible one in your mouth and throat. You’re trembling, trying to keep yourself upright as Joel fucks into you through his orgasm. You lick your lips. There’s a flavor there. Is that….?

“You like Daddy’s brisket cum, sweetheart?” he grunts as his thrusts slow to a sloppy grind.

“I thought I tasted barbecue,” you muse. It was bewildering, but mostly satisfying.

“Yeah, tastes just like those Fourth of July backyard get-togethers you love in that Texas heat,” he breathes. "You runnin' around in barely anything, makin' me hafta adjust myself so your dad don't catch his best friend ogling his precious daughter."

“I’m starting to think you read more fic than you admitted to earlier,” you assert.

“I like it, darlin’,” he shrugs.

“Are you gonna follow Puddles now? Oh! Can you do a mind link thing with her and see what she’s working on next?” you implore.

Joel appears to zone out for a minute, and you take the opportunity to stare at his naked body. He looked perfect. His eyes focused again as he looked at you.

“Her waveforms are erratic and very concerning, but once I subdued a Brain Goblin inside her mind I was able to discern she is likely to be releasing some Ezra from Prospect centered fictional stories,” the voice inside your head revealed. "They are very sexually aggressive."

“Nice,” you say under your breath.

“So you gonna let me have that sweet pussy again, sweetheart?” Joel drawls.

“Yes. But I’m going to need you to familiarize yourself with Pedro’s extensive works. I’m thinking we could do some really great Mando roleplay in this spaceship,” you say with a big smile as you gesture around.

Joel smirks at you. “Don’t matter what form I take. You’re still gonna be callin’ me Daddy.”

“Yes, Daddy,” you agree with a big grin.

I hope those splorgimums understand what they lost bc that's our man now! Special thanks to Multiversed Daydreamer (Fuzz) for inspiring part of the title and @xdaddysprincessxx for the shared derangement over That Old Man™.

Undying thanks to @psychedelic-ink and @bonezone44 for writing some of my fave ~aLtErNaTiVe KiNk CoNtEnT~ and inspiring me to let my brain run wild with this crackfic.

Art in graphic includes transformed works of the Mucinex booger man.

catch ya later, ♥Puddles♥

P.S. - I counted how many times "Daddy" appears in this, and it's 29.

tagging: @wannab-urs, @gracieispunk, @milla-frenchy, @patti7dc. @lumoverheaven, @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog, @toxicanonymity, @rubyfruitjungle, @huffle-punk, @jupiter-soups, @swiftispunk, @theywhowriteandknowthings

[onestopfanficshop]

dating carmy berzatto pt. 2

warnings: language, here's a few nsfw things in here so watch out for that 👀 mdni

author's note: after forever i'm back lol 😭 i started school again and lowkey lost motivation to write so this has been in the works for weeks lol! enjoy <3

gif not mine!

you can count on one hand how many times carmy has called you by your real name. his go-to pet names are honey (he would say hon most often), baby (when he's trying to persuade you, when he’s whining about something, or when he feels guilty), and sweetheart (when he's feeling extra romantic and lovey-dovey). even when you two are fighting or on the very rare occasion that his anger's directed at you, he rarely uses your name

one time when you had stayed over, you left your shampoo at carm's place and he made mistake of using it just to try it out because the next day richie noticed

"did you rob a fuckin' hair salon, cousin?"

"what the fuck do you mean, richie?"

"the fuck do you mean? what is this shit, herbal essences?" richie says, sniffing carmy's hair.

poor boy would turn red from head to toe and never touch your anything of yours ever again

this one's sad but like- it's kinda important i think

obviously mike's death really fucked carmy up. you see him pushing away, detaching himself from the people who love him (just like mikey did). but you coming into his life really forces him to wake the fuck up. family is forever but you're something in carmy's life that isn't guaranteed and that he genuinely has to work for if he wants you around long-term

and he's so terrified to fuck it up but after you assure him over and over again that you don't intend to go anywhere he starts to loosen up a tiny bit and let you in

his family and everyone else at the restaurant can see the effect you're having on him, and even though they were a little apprehensive at first, they're so glad that carmy has you in his life

okay enough emotional stuff :,)

i know we don't see him read in the show but something in me tells me that he'd love a good library date. he raids the cookbook section, you clear out half of the romance section, and then you'd have a picnic in a park after and read each other's books and swap ideas

carmy dog-ears the pages of the borrowed cookbooks to make note of later. even though you've scolded him a thousand times not to fold the pages, he just can't help but forget, okay? old habits die hard

"look, baby, it's not my intention to hurt the book, okay? i swear. this is just easier than using a bookmark"

his favorite fruits are plums (with the skin on) or granny smith apples (also with the skin on)

would 1000% name a dish after you

keeps his hand in yours or on your thigh while he drives with the other hand

he has to set his alarm at least half an hour before he actually needs to get up so he can hit snooze 3 times

speaking of sleep we all know this poor man barely gets any so on the rare occasion that he does he can be out for hours at a time no joke

when you first started sleeping over at his place more, sometimes it would scare when he woke up and saw you sound asleep next to him because you seemed too good to be real :,)

one time he was teaching you proper knife technique before you were officially together; he put his hand over yours on the knife and even though he looked calm on the outside, he was freaking the FUCK out on the inside but for the life of him he couldn't tell why (it's called a crush carmy look it up)

i know it's hard to imagine carmy having a least favorite food because he is a chef, but idk; i feel like it would be cornbread 😭 something abt it just makes no sense to him. he thought maybe it was because he's had bad cornbread, so he made it for himself once and still didn't like it. who would put corn in bread? what was the reason?!

he always keeps you on the innermost part of the sidewalk whenever you're walking together

this isn't even a headcanon bc we all saw it on the show but 😭 this man's EYE CONTACT. good lord. the best (and worst) part is he isn't even aware of the power it holds on you; he would literally stare at you whenever you would talk and you'd get all flustered and he would just be completely clueless as to why

he LOVES it when you grip onto his arms while you’re fucking and he constantly teases you for being so obsessed with them 👀 any time he feels like skipping a workout he just thinks about that and boom he’s motivated

“you sure you wanna go out to eat? i can just make us somethin’ real quick”

would definitely get a tattoo for you once you guys got serious! something cute and simple (idk much abt tattoos lol); would love it if you had a matching one on you in a place that only he could see 👀

neck kisses are his absolute favorite. especially from behind when he gets to completely bury his face in your neck and kiss it into oblivion

literally ever since i saw carm take those jeans out of the oven my brain has been stuck on the idea that has an odd but endearing obsession with vintage levis lol 😭 one time, after the bear had opened up and completely taken off, he stayed up all night on ebay and scored a vintage type ii trucker jacket after furiously bidding on it for over an hour like a mad man

this man's always using his hands so i can totally picture his fingers doing all sorts of weird things to fidget. absentmindedly drumming his fingers on your thighs, rubbing strands of hair between his thumb and pointer finger-- literally anything to keep his hands occupied

“is this too spicy or no?”

always insists that you don't have to come to the restaurant to help but is secretly over-the-moon when you do. seeing you help with the dishes, or scold richie, or laugh with tina just makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside (and makes him wanna start a family with you oops)

if he sees you he has to give you a full hug. he’s not a side hug kind of guy when it comes you. even if he has to drop what he’s doing in the kitchen and wipe his hands! he always gives you an all-encompassing bear hug and kisses you on the forehead and the lips- it’s his signature greeting :,)

[cherienymphe]

HI, I found out that I'm pregnant this morning, me and the father have a long distance relationship but we essentially have only been together for 6 months. we saw each other over the summer,but we're doing the long distance thing again now.

I told him, and he went into full panic mode, saying he's not ready to be a father and saying that he shouldn't have done anything that night. It really started stressing me out, so I told him that and he said OK, I should get some rest.

I know you're not a therapist but I really don't want my family to know about his reaction, because even though I'm 23y/o they still treat me like I'm a child. My mother knows and she is waiting to hear back from me how he reacted, but im honestly scared and a little ashamed to tell her.

I don't know what to do, can anyone give me some advice?

You may not like my advice...but um...you need to get rid of that baby

It's ultimately your choice, but I'm telling you what I would do and what I think you should do. I'm about to get real honest and heavy, but if you have this baby, you need to accept the very high possibility that you will be a single mother. If that's something you can be okay with, then by all means. If not... He's made his feelings on the matter clear, and yes, I think it's valid for him to be a little freaked out but the way he handled it and what he said is not it.

Does he just assume you are ready to be a parent? Any mature man would know that you must be more worried than him considering you're the one that's carrying the child and will have to actually give birth to it. He can just walk away while you seemingly can't. You told him you're pregnant, and all he thought about was himself. Not to mention he expressed regret for making the baby. He flat out said he wished he hadn't slept with you.

At the risk of sounding like some evangelical christian in the backwoods of Kentucky, pregnancy is just one of those risks you take when you have sex. It is what it is. No birth control is 100% effective and I feel like when you have sex, you subconsciously accept that could happen while also subconsciously accepting what you'll do about it should it occur. His shock is giving 16 year old boy instead of grown man. Y'all had sex. Sometimes that happens with sex. I don't really see why the surprise that it happened to you guys and instead of discussing this like mature adults, he had a full blown freak out like he's going to be a teen dad or something.

Obviously you know him better than I do, but from where I'm standing, it doesn't seem like he's cut out for the job. Idk he just doesn't seem like a man I'd procreate with. Y'all only been dating for 6 months so I definitely think it's reasonable to terminate the pregnancy and cut him loose. Or simply cut him loose if you're okay with being a single mom. Either way he gotta go

[vole-mon-amour]

3x10, a mix of everything, part 1

didn't expect it to happen that fast but HELL YEAH. there's nothing for Nathan to do next to Rupert. Rupert keeps switching his lovers like socks while his wife is still at home with their daughter. come on!! villain arc for Bex and Rebecca when? when is Rupert gonna get killed die and leave Bex all the money??? and then Bex and Rebecca become best friends and raise a daughter together?

Trent being the heart of the team? do you remember how it all started and how wary everyone was of him? do you? it warms my heart, but it warms it twice bc of the clear bond we see between Colin and Trent. like, older queer with younger queer, helping each other out and bonding. their friendship does things to me tbh. it's so very important and intimate and—

in other words, representation matters.

yaaay! also, Trent <3333 again, this warms my heart.

sometimes I really have no idea what this season is doing. i miss them being a dramedy, not a full on sitcom. i'm enjoying this season, but sometimes it's borderline too much. it's out of nowhere and it's not necessary at all.

besties unlocked <3 Trent is such a sunshine, I love him. the way he and Ted share a raised eyebrows look. there is something so wonderful happening between Ted and Trent from the moment they met. it's like they're connected and are being drawn to each other.

girl talk, especially when it involves middle aged men <3 Rebecca as their leader is really something. i love it.

I think Rebecca is being mean to the actual devil. also, why do iphone users love their matte screen cover? why not the regular one?

Trent is so in love with Ted, my goodness. that cute smile. Ted is so freaking oblivious, I need the show to do something about it. i need Ted to learn Trent is in love with him.

this is such a nice shot. something something, the idea of press taking pics of Nate's gf leaving. which at first I thought was kind of nice, but then she leaves with a suitcase and it looks like a breakup of some sort, so not that nice. hm. still, the shot is pretty.

this is such a nice look & I like her hair a lot, but my GOD, how do people wear those minies? it's beyond good and evil for me. shorts i can kinda understand, but skirts? that's... yeah, no.

there you go Jack's "me and Keeley are dating" without asking Keeley first if she wants to announce it and then Jack totally ghosting Keeley. *frustrated high pitched growl* I hate that plotline. if it's their way to push Keeley back towards Roy bc she will no longer be that busy so Roy can't come up with that excuse again, that's a very shitty thing to do. so far I don't see the bigger picture of this. they've been messing up Keeley's storyline this season just like that.

"the board" oh, fuck you, Jack. (in Grace Le Domas' voice) fucking rich people.

Dani crushing Van Damme's chips is such a dick move, ESPECIALLY since you're trashing the airplane!! you're not the one who's gonna have to clean it up, you asshole.

can somebody connect this parallel for me pls? it's just within my reach but it slips away.

sooo, Beard isn't getting out of a toxic relationship? gotta say, this plotline concerns me. idk where they're going with it and WHY in the first place. Beard deserves better & Jane needs some serious therapy.

#fired immediately

I'm here for Rebecca standing up for herself against Rupert. I hate that asshole so much.

I don't remember, have we seen Roy's sister before? it's so rare.

go fuck yourself. yes, i'm quick to jump to conclusions and violence.

Leslie is NOT having a good tea time this season. let him enjoy his tea 2k23! however, the fact that he knows every friend Rebecca has. some friendship between him and Rebecca developed along the way since s1.

[cinnamon-phrog]

Dhmis headcanons let's goooo

^^^ banner is a disclaimer not a DNI! I just wanna be clear I case I get misinterpreted!

Yellow

Yellow has more allergies than anyone else ever and has incredibly irritable skin prone to rashes and acne no matter what skin products he uses or how frequently he washes.

Can wiggle his ears Fozzie Bear style idk I just find that visual cute <3

He has stretchy limbs like his dad but only slightly, he can’t stretch himself nearly as far as Roy can

Yellows’ nose can make a cartoony honk noise, like a clown <3

Doesn’t just love spaghetti but ALL pasta dishes. Literally anything pasta or potato based is his kinda thing.

He’s the one who painted all the paintings in the house, even the one with him and Roy, since if his father can’t be there with or for him then at least he can in a painting.

Can’t paint horses. Cannot. But he knows Red loves them so he attempted to paint one for him. He hates it and cringes at it but Red insists it’s perfect and keeps in up on the kitchen wall.

Gets hot easily due to his batteries working overtime to keep him alive and hates wearing thick fabric clothes like jumpers and hoodies because of his irregular heat.

He can grasp things easier if left to his own devices. If something is explained to him via word of mouth he’s not going to comprehend it and would much rather figure it out himself and experiment. [Again I swear I’m not projecting….]

Has maladaptive daydreaming disorder.

Forgets things easily but remembers give Duck glasses of water at least twice a day to prevent him from going Back in The Hole again.]

Likes Duck because he is green and although he can’t remember much about himself, green is comforting to him.

Falls somewhere on the masochist spectrum [he likes being bitten. Cmonnnnn if the other two are freaks so is he let me have this one]

Suffers fatigue and can’t walk far without needing to sit down at least five times.

Has tried everything to ease this and his chronic thinking induced headaches, including various pills, tablets and herbal teas.

Very light sleeper, he wakes up constantly throughout the night, and will sometimes give up sleeping altogether.

Duck

Surprisingly really talented at sewing.

Loves fashion, and creates all his own outfits.

Also sewed the tablecloth in the kitchen.

Actually a really good cook but can’t be bothered to most of the time.

Has dioramas of war enactments and model planes that he plays around with secretly.

He has slight Aphantasia, meaning he struggles to visualise imagery. I have this headcanon because in Jobs, when he is told he can do a million things, he only thinks of about three. He can’t imagine what a million would look like. Again it’s just a headcanon and not to be taken seriously.

Hates the cold. In the winter he will stay in and turn all the radiators as high as possible to simulate migrating to somewhere hot. The heating bill is through the roof now.

Idolizes the military because he lived near a shelter as a child and admired them when his life wasn’t the best. He doesn’t remember that of course but he still found comfort in it and hasn’t really stopped to question why.

Has a weird relationship with food. The Healthy episode, plus him listing his favourite foods [that are all high in sugar and carbs] are given an explanation by being diagnosed with diabetes in electricity. Plus Dehydration can be dangerous for people with diabetes. High blood sugar can make you more at risk of dehydration, which is why Duck died by forgetting to drink water.

Has a rubber duck to take a bath with because ducks usually bathe together and get lonely easily.

Takes the longest getting ready for any kind of event. Like ridiculous levels of vanity just trying to pick a tie that compliments him.

Very trusting when someone is nice to him, you give him one compliment and he’s your best friend ever forever now.

Needs to wear glasses but refuses because he thinks he looks too geeky.

Used to be like Warren when it comes to friendships but he’s slowly teaching himself to be kinder, even just a little bit.

Frequently scams people for money by pretending to be a single hot milf online. Catfishing king securing that bag fr fr. Mostly it’s just Roy that falls for the scams.

PANSEXUAL. IN MY HEART OF HEARTS.

Moults his feathers quite often due to stress and is prone to over-preening himself.

Drinks 5+ cups of tea per day. Bri’ish check.

Red

His childhood horse girl phase never truly died down, all horse related things in the house belong to him besides the painting in the kitchen, which came about from him begging Yellow to paint a horse for him.

He actually wasn’t lying in the It’s Nice That interview and does actually enjoy extreme sports, or rather… watching them on the telly. So half a lie.

Has executive dysfunction and flat affect.

Struggles to find his own individuality around other people and would much rather mimic their behaviour. That’s why he’s kind to Yellow when they’re alone but mean to him when Red is in a dynamic with Duck.

He pretends not to care about peoples’ opinions but he’s awfully self-conscience about himself and the way he behaves.

Needs about a whole bag worth of coffee in order to feel even a little awake.

Prone to napping throughout the day.

VERY heavy sleeper. Could sleep through just about anything.

Similar to Yellow, Red hates feeling hot and because he’s covered in thick, fleecy hair he simply chooses not to wear clothes. However he finds it weird when other people do it because that’s the only individuality he feels is solely for himself.

His hair is prone to frizzing and needs a gazillion different hair products and brush types to take care of it.

Goes between not taking care of himself and practically rotting himself or pampering and spoiling himself rotten. No in between.

Has posture and back problems.

Can purr like a kibby <333

All of Red’s species is agender and intersex.

Spoils Skrunty the cat like she’s his own little princess because she IS. She’s his little muffin pie. His skrunkly Skrunty woo. His BABY.

Likes spicy food but is all about trying new impossible diets which he’ll regret and forget in about a week.

Really likes spicy foods and although he’s the one who set the no sharing food thing in motion he will beg for a taste of any food Duck makes [which is usually curry dishes]

[mschismosa]

Hey can i ask yall something, am I the only one who does this, bc it has recently come to my attention that I exhibit freak behavior. It's for art reasons though.

I ramble about this a little bit u can ignore me

I hate that I started doing this bc i'll be somewhere & catch myself looking really spaced out touching my jaw or something. In my mind I'm trying to visualize the jawline i wanna draw but I bet i just look like a freak lmao 😭

I have the adhd, I can't afford to exit the drawing app & get distracted so i end up doing this. It's like my personal quick reference trick. Feeling the features of my face as I draw helps me visualize the shapes in a 3D way, does that make sense?

Anyway i felt like admitting this stupid habit of mine bc I just wonder if others do this?? But also I recommend it if you're more of a tactile learner. Sometimes clear reference images still don't make sense to me but this does. Particularly when thinking about how light/shadows hit a certain part of your face or like visualizing lines and shapes and small overlooked features. Like, how often do you really think about noses and ears and cheekbones... I have gone into mental rabbitholes thinking about variety in facial features compared to my own and how the feel & structure differ and then wonder how I'd apply it to drawing. Same goes for like visualizing expressions by feeling the pull and tension of muscle & such. It really helps me figure out how faces work and in a way makes simplifying it in drawings a little easier even. Of course I still look at references but it takes this to really GET it in an irl sense. Its usually not this deep though, I just find feeling something is faster for like remembering the basic build of it without having to look it up. hence the comic. Im aware my skills/ability to actually draw what I think are still too limited to be parading this as some kind of secret art hack but idk? I think you can learn a lot from your own face. Or maybe I have too much time on my hands and I've tricked myself into thinking im onto something lmao

Sorry im aware this is how I look rn

[infamous-if]

You don’t need to post this but just so you know, it really does sounding like almost no one in the story who have witness to or have heard the MC’s work think it is very interesting at all 🫣, and just occasionally a person will randomly appreciate for some reason, such as Orion. I think maybe a lot of readers might had anticipated a type of MC that has the experience of undeniably suited for this and so on, in the way you have sometimes describe some others in the story, such as S

Hi ! Sorry but I'm going to post this mostly (and apologies that your ask is the one who is gonna get this long response, my ire isn't towards you because you're being very kind about it but others have, honestly, not been) because other people probably have this thought as well but I'm sort of confused on where this whole idea of MC being useless/untalented/not suitable is coming from?

I've said before there will be people who question MC's talent, but that's just natural--not everyone is going to think someone is worthy of their fame and attention. People thinking that there are better singers out there doesn't invalidate what MC is capable of. If I wrote a story where every person thinks MC is the greatest thing since sliced bread then that wouldn't be an entertaining story lol You need tension, and you need naysayers so every win can feel satisfying. Plus, doubters is a natural and normal thing in the business. MC is literally in a competition where other very talented bands are competing. Even though they're the main character, they're the main character of their story. Not everyone elses. Other bands believe they are just as deserving--if not more--of winning than MC's band. It's natural. To those bands MC is just another person they need to beat to win.

Seven being more famous doesn't mean MC isn't talented (the band literally voted for MC's vocals over Seven's). G being more famous doesn't mean MC isn't talented. Hell, if MC's band lost BOTB and went home empty handed, that doesn't mean MC isn't talented. It's part of the competition. Amazing bands and amazing singers get rejected all the time. There isn't room for everybody.

I do want to mention that people probably feel this way because I can not give concrete answers about an MC that is largely customizable. In the game, your MC can lack confidence. Or they can be arrogant. They can believe their skills are lackluster, or they can believe they are the best singer alive. People expect me to answer questions that have varied answers depending on what MC each player is playing. I can't give you that! I do my best.

Orion listened to MC once and quit his job to manage them.

2. August auditioned to be their drummer, and while August is largely indifferent, they admit themselves they were interested and they tell MC how good MC's voice is.

3. Maya is quite literally following MC's band around the USA because she's that much of a fan.

4. Seven dislikes MC, but Seven is not a liar: they will always stand by their opinion that MC is talented. That's one of the biggest reasons why Seven liked MC so much: their artistry.

4. This is spoilery but fuck it: G listened to MC once and wanted MC's band in BOTB.

idk why people think that people listen to MC and get bored when I don't think I've ever indicated that? The demo isn't even out lshshdhsahs

anyway this isn't an attack on you anon but it is kind of frustrating that people think MC is just this untalented fluke that didn't work hard to get to where they are today. Just as much as MC is yours, they're also mine, and I wanted to make it clear that MC isn't lazy nor are they someone who just does nothing and doesn't try. At least that part isn't customizable: MC works and has worked really freaking hard to be where they are.

sorry for the long response and once again, this isn't an attack on you, but this has been a topic in my inbox and i just dont get it--the demo is literally not even out.

[wings-of-sapphire]

Snow White rewrite

Hello loves, so I’ve been procrastinating this for a WHILE but I was like fuck it I’ll post what I have so far

Remember like fifteen years ago when I said I’d post my Snow White rewrite? Well, I want to get at least some of it out to get some traction going, especially since Disney’s live-action Snow White is coming out soon and I’m… intrigued to see how it goes.

Anyways, here’s my WIP rewrite— not finished, may be subject to edits later, I have reasons for what I’m doing trust me

Red as the Rose

A Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs rewrite (revamp? Idk)

Meet Snow Dysni.

Her stepmother is not the nicest person.

She’s never met her mother, as she died shortly after Snow was born, so she wasn’t exactly well-versed in motherhood knowledge. But she was pretty sure stepmothers aren’t supposed to kill you.

Some backstory.

Snow is the princess of the kingdom of Grimm. Grimmians are a wonderful people. At least, Snow assumes so. She hasn’t interacted with them much.

Her birth mother was allegedly murdered by an enchantress, and then her father sort of freaked out and banned all magic. All the neighboring kingdoms started to follow his rule, forcing all the magical creatures to go into hiding. Most fled to the Twists, a cursed forest full of the Wrathborne– nightmares come to life. Yeah. Magic, from what Snow has learned, isn’t the greatest.

But still, being cooped up in this castle all day isn’t really the life. Snow knew all the staff’s names by heart. But there’s no teens in the palace, and her only friend is this cat that roams the castle grounds sometimes. Snow named her Shanks. She brings Snow flower snacks sometimes.

It’s just meetings and being locked up in her room. Her stepmother says it’s unbecoming for a princess with such little social awareness to be among the people. Snow’s only meeting royals and nobles. Like today, a meeting with Isel, the eastern kingdom, and their prince, Florian White.

Snow talks with Florian. When he laughs, it makes something inside her bubble. Maybe he poisoned her.

Oh, no. He poisoned her!

The royal nurse clears Snow, though. I guess Florian can pass for now.

There’s also Huntsman, whose real name Snow doesn’t know. She tries to talk with him sometimes. He doesn’t really talk otherwise.

But one day, Huntsman tells Snow that he can sneak her out of the castle for a night. She agrees. Because obviously!

Huntsman takes Snow out to see the Grimmians. To see her people! Away from her stepmother. Queen Isla Grimhilde. Snow doesn’t know why her father puts up with her. She really doesn’t.

They end up in the Twists.

Snow asks Huntsman what they’re doing here.

He pulls out a knife and stabs her. Snow screams, blood splattering the floor. She hears a Wrathborne near, then something tackles the Huntsman. Probably. She can’t see anything, too blind from pain. White, searing pain. All she can think of is blood. Her blood.

Snow sees the Wrathborne fighting with the Huntsman. Snow gasps out in pain and starts to stumble away. She sees a cottage in the distance. She falls to the floor. She hears voices above her.

She passes out.

Snow awakens up to grumbling. Something about red on the sheets. She blearily opens her eyes. She see six noses poking out on top of the bedframe.

She tries to scramble up. Someone cries out. It took Snow a moment to realize it was her. Red-hot pain shoots up her back.

“Woah, woah, steady there!”

Snow stares at the man beside her. Er… child? Man the size of a child?

Oh. Dwarves!

“You’re dwarves!” she croaks out.

The dwarf laughs. He introduces himself as Doc, the eldest brother. He explains how their nephew found me outside, bleeding, and had to go, but notified Doc and his brothers about her. They treated her.

Snow tries to scream, but a hand claps over her mouth. Snow sees another dwarf in front of her. He looks like he wants her head.

“Quiet, lass! You’ll attract Grimhilde’s soldiers!”

“The heck I will! You’re illegal magicals! You should be arrested!”

“We saved your royal life! Show some gratefulness!”

Aaaanyways. The seven introduce themself. There’s Doc, the oldest and the kindest. Happy, who’s… happy all the time. Snow has a suspicion he may be on drugs. Grumpy doesn’t like her at all. Dopey— at least she thinks that’s his name… maybe it’s Mopey but that doesn’t seem right— is mute and signs. Snow unfortunately doesn’t know sign, so his brothers have to translate.

Uhhh there’s Sleepy. Mate, same. Sneezy… please stay away. Bashful Snow doesn't know much about, as he tends to stay away.

Apparently there was an eighth named Raspulstin or whatever… Snow wasn’t really paying attention. She’s too busy analyzing everything.

Magic was evil. Magic killed her mother. Magic is what creates the Wrathborne, the evil spirits of the Twists.

But these magicals… saved her.

[staygoldponyboi]

the most random outsiders headcanons because i’m bored

ponyboy:

on rainy days he likes to stay in bed and read for hours

is terrified of frogs for some reason (i saw this somewhere and could totally see it. i didn’t make this one)

hates cats. their sharp claws and teeth freak him out (ok so maybe this one was a little self-reflected..they’re adorable sometimes but i’m deathly allergic and they scare me)

is allergic to pineapple but eats it anyway

soda:

HATES fanta. as he should.

likes to do yoga when he can’t sleep because it clears his mind. idk he just seems like he would do yoga don’t ask me man

loves spaghetti (who doesn’t fr)

darry:

loves cows for no reason. he just thinks they’re cool. (haha dairy i’m so funny)

snores sometimes. very loud.

isn’t scared of bugs at all. except centipedes. he HATES centipedes. “i hate the way they run, and NOTHING needs that many legs.”

steve:

he doesn’t let out his feelings to people or reflect on things a lot, but when he does, he knows soda will listen

he has always been obsessed with cars. he was the kind of kid to hog every single toy car at daycare.

he just really likes ducks

he thinks dirty humor is hilarious

two butt:

makes dad jokes and hysterically laughs at them

falls asleep in the goofiest positions

he’s perfectly memorized every elvis presley song and sings them to himself a lot. it drives darry crazy.

johnny:

HES PUERTO RICAN

like pony, cats scare him. he’s allergic to pretty much every animal anyways. (let me self reflect ok 🤨🤨)

loves to bake with dally. dally gets really annoyed sometimes, though, because he’ll just eat all the frosting and sprinkles before they’re used

definitely has a rock collection

dally:

dally thinks snakes are pretty cool and goes out looking for them a lot. johnny hates it. “oh my god, dally, put that thing down!”

silently judges everyone

blueberry muffin enjoyer

[princessdimondheart]

It’s The Dog | Chapter 2 | Ghost x Dog Handler! OC

Pairing: Ghost x f! OC

Warnings: None really, language, is dog poop a warning??

Edited: No

A/N: An extra long chapter for the wait. ~3k+! I'm finally on Spring Break!! I’m not certain what to name my OC so I’m just gonna leave her nameless (for now, maybe idk). However, she is a Latina (Mex) so her name is of Hispanic origin. She's 21, and Ghost is 30-32, so... age difference. As for her rank of Sergeant, she's freshly pinned. Debating whether I should name her dog Riley…. I did in the end lol

Masterlist

Ch.1 | Ch.2 [Here] | Ch.3

Title banner ©️ Me

2.

The last mission was long and hard, but Sergeant Canis was certain that she and her dog were going to be fine after a good rest back at base. They were waiting on the other side of the huge hill again for an exfil. She had just called over her radio and was waiting a response back. Although their work was done for the time being, both she and her dog were actively searching the top of the hill for any signs of enemies that they may have missed. She glanced to her dog. He had his ears on a swivel and his nose was twitching as he tried to scent out any bad guys to bite. 

Without a doubt was Canis proud of her doggo. He’d been working extra hard this mission and rightly deserved lots of treats and pets. 

Hmm… maybe I’ll cook him up a steak-

Her train of thought was cut off by the grainy- yet somehow clear- sound of her radio going off. 

“Charlie-04, what’s your status? This is Tango-06”

“Tango-06, this is Charlie-04, requesting exfil to RTB. The LZ is clear.” Canis provided their coordinates to the pilot. 

“Received. ETA in 6 minutes.” The helicopter pilot responded. 

Not long after, the helicopter was landing nearby and blowing hot air and dust all over the place. Luckily she was wearing sunglasses and her dog had to funky goggles that sometimes made her giggle at the sight of him. Both quickly made their way into the helo and they were off back to base. But just before they could properly settle in one of the exfil crew was calling her name. 

“Sergeant Canis, sir, you have an incoming call. Permission to switch to private comms?” 

“Go ahead.” She was a bit confused. 

Who the hell’s calling me at a time like this??

Once the comm was switched it was then that she heard him. 

“Sergeant? How’s it goin’, love?”

“Well, hello there, Captain…”

This was going to be a long day for Canis, she was sure of it. 

~~~~~

Ghost was waiting next to Soap a little ways off from the tarmac, when a C-130 Hercules transport aircraft landed on the runway. It began to taxi towards their standing location. Several minutes later the plane began to unload its cargo. If he was to be honest, Simon was excited for a dog to join the team. He had always liked them when he was younger but was only ever able to admire them from afar. His father would have never allowed one in their home. 

He could hear dog barks getting closer as the crate transporting the dog was unloaded. Ghost spotted the crate and could just make out the silhouette of a German shepherd dog. His eyes moved up when he saw a figure walking up next to the crate. The person placed their hand on top of the crate and pat it a few times, most likely to calm the canine down. It didn’t seem to work.

When they got close enough, Johnny voiced his concern. 

“Is the dog good?” He was worried the dog was going to bark itself to oblivion. Even with the muzzle the dog had on, he kept barking. 

“Riley? Oh, yeah. He does this when he notices we’re not at the same base as before. He’ll get used to this base eventually, so when we comeback from missions in the future he’ll just be sleeping.” Riley? “I think he does this to freak everyone out. So are ya?”

“Freaked out? A bit, lass.” Johnny chuckled, then remembered the dog’s name. “Did you say, Riley?”

“Yeah. It was his name when I got him as a two-year old. Why?” She looked between the two men. Mohawk guy was giving a knowing look to Mr. Broody. She couldn’t bring herself to look at the skull-clad man in the eyes. His presence was intense. He didn’t acknowledge his younger teammate. 

Johnny grinned, “No particular reason. Just glad to have you and Riley on the team…”

“Oof, sorry, I forgot to introduce myself there.” She gave them her name. “But you guys can call me Canis.” 

Canis and Soap shook hands. “Name’s Johnny MacTavish but you can call me Soap since we’re the same rank.” Letting go of her hand, he gestured to Simon. “This here is Ghost. I just call him L.t.”

The lieutenant grunted in greeting before reaching out his hand for a shake. His hand was warm against her cooler fingers. They were definitely much larger than hers, but given her height, everyone’s hands were bigger than hers anyways. Canis steeled herself and looked him in the eyes. His lids drooped and she couldn’t see his pupils in the darkness, but she could see that his eyes had a softness in them yet not completely. He was still wary of her being there, all new and whatnot. Her cheeks began to warm as the stare held on. His hand was in hers for a few seconds longer than normal, and when Ghost noticed he immediately let go. His mind had wandered off like hers did. Her eyes drifted to Riley who had finally relaxed his barking during their little introduction. She didn’t see Ghost flexing his hand behind his back. 

Ghost’s own cheeks had warmed, but he shook the feeling away. “Let’s go. The Captain is waiting for us.”

He turned and led them to the building, not turning to see if they were following them or not. 

~~~~~

Once in the cargo bay of the main building, Canis clipped the leash onto Riley’s collar which clearly read: DO NOT PET; and let Riley walk out on his lead, letting him quickly do his business on a grassy area just outside, then cleaned up after him. She had trained him to go on command, which was convenient for her whenever they were on time sensitive missions. 

They walked for a short while until Ghost stopped in front of a frosted glass top door. Canis could make out that the lights were on but she couldn’t see if anyone was inside already. Ghost knocked on the wooden part of the door and waited until a muffled answer told him it was okay to enter. Upon hearing it, he opened the door and held it open for his two sergeants. Soap pat his thanks on Ghost’s shoulder, while Canis whispered her thanks. Ghost could just hear it but his hand gripping the door began to sweat. Riley took a moment to sniff the tall man. Curious. 

Captain Price was sitting behind his desk like usual. A young man closer in age to Canis was sitting across from him. Both looked over to them as they came inside the decent sized office. Extra chairs lined the far wall, which Johnny was taking the time to move them in front of the desk. 

Price called her name. “Or should I call you Canis now?” One of his thick brows twitched upwards in question. “Running with the wolves now, love?”

Canis grinned at her new Captain. “You know me, Old Man. I’m always one for having a pack.” She gave him a little wink. A short laugh escaped her blush pink lips. 

“You two know each other well?” The only person Canis did not know looked between them. Johnny also had a slightly confused look to his face. 

“Quite, Old Man and I go back since I was in the womb to be honest.” Canis looked at him. “Umm…?”

“Oh! Gaz on missions and Kyle while on base.”

“He’s like an uncle to me, Kyle.” Canis sat down. Riley and the other two doing the same. 

“Her father and I used to run missions together.” Price gave his two cents. “He’s an Army Ranger. Good man. Retired now.” The others looked at her in awe. The Army Rangers were the elite of the elite and were definitely people that any military man should inspire to be. His face turned contemplative. 

“Any reason why you’re in the Air Force and not following in your father’s footsteps?” It was a legitimate question, but it made Canis tense at the words. 

“Well, you know him, Old Man. I wanted to piss him off… He’s a better Ranger than he ever was a parent.” Price’s brows furrowed, then she mumbled off a, “Chair force my ass…” 

The situation with her father still made her upset so she said nothing more. She did not want to dampen the mood any more than it had already had. 

It was quiet for a second until Johnny broke it, asking her a simple ice breaker question. “So, your doggo know any tricks, lass?” Johnny flashed her a grin. His eyes darted to the diligently sitting German shepherd. 

“A trick, Soap?” She smiled back. 

“Yeah.”

“Salute your superior, Sergeant.” She grinned at Soap while his face flashed a look of confusion at the other three. Gaz looked equally confused but Price had a small smile on his face, and he couldn’t gauge Ghost’s reaction because of his mask. 

“Umm… the Captain?” He wasn’t sure what she meant. His fellow Sergeant shook her head and tilted it towards her four-legged partner. Riley sat perfectly still, his brown eyes staring at the man. “The dog?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Ah… okay, then.” Soap then brought his hand up in a salute and waited, but only for a moment. 

Riley lifted his large paw as high as he could and placed it in front of his eye before setting it down. A doggy salute. 

Soap blinked and yet still couldn’t believe it. Riley had saluted back at him. Captain Price had chuckled at the antics going on and Gaz let loose a “Woah!” Ghost only titled his head a bit but he was definitely amused by this. If anyone had looked closely, they would have seen the skin by his eyes crinkle just a bit. 

Riley wagged his tail and turned his head to his designated mother as if asking: “I did good right? Okay, now where’s my treat, human?”

Canis tossed him a piece of chicken she had in her pocket. Riley snapped at it mid air with a sharp snap of his jaws. She was proud of her friend. This was not something that was explicitly taught when going through handler training, but was a trick that Canis taught Riley to do as a way to boost morale on long haul missions with her previous teams. The boys had loved it so it stuck. “Good boy.”

“Wait, why does Johnny have to salute Riley? He’s his superior?” Gaz almost raised his hand to ask, his upper body moving towards her. Soap leaned closer, too. 

“Well, any MWD is a rank higher than their handler.” Canis replied, her face turned serious. “It’s like that to prevent any handler from abusing their dogs. Imagine punching your Captain… yeah, it wouldn’t go down well.”

“Well said. Now, get settled. Tomorrow we’re going to do a mini training session with all of you and with Riley. I want to see how well you perform.” Price stood from his chair. “I also want those of you who haven’t worked with a dog before to get used to them and see what they are capable of, at least in principle. You’ll get the idea once we’re out in the field.”

A chorus of ‘yes, sir’s and everyone stood up.

“Did’ya bring any special equipment with ya that we could use for tomorrow?” The Captain continued. His attention focused on Canis. 

“Equipment?” She believed she knew what he was talking about. “Yes, sir. I’ll have it prepped in the morning.”

“Good, miss.” Then he exited first. 

Canis grabbed a hold of Riley’s lead before he could wander off with the rest. Riley began sniffing everyone as they walked out the door. He sniffed the longest at the person who stayed behind. 

Ghost let his hand be sniffed by Riley. The dog was taking lots of breaths, his nose twitching with each inhale and exhale. His lips twitched when he saw Riley’s tail move side to side. It was 100% a pleasure making a dog happy. Taking Riley’s friendly posture as a queue, he pats him on the head. Riley’s butt wiggled with his tail wags, and he tried to lick Ghost’s hand even through the muzzle. 

Canis stood there and let the interaction happen with no interruption, despite the ‘DO NOT PET’ in bold on his collar. This would be the only exception. It was good for Riley to interact with the team as soon and as often as possible. It would help them trust her dog more while on a mission. She smiled at the two. It was sweet. 

Ghost looked up sensing eyes on him. His cheeks burned again. He felt a little silly forgetting that Canis was still there waiting on them. And here he was loving on her dog. A good dog, but still. He coughed lightly and with a final pat on Riley’s head, Ghost turned and left the room.

Canis shrugged and smiled knowingly once he was out of the room. Then she led Riley out as well and made their way to their designated barracks. 

~~~~~

The following morning Canis woke up early due to Riley licking her hand. His whine to be let out had her shooting out of bed. She did not want to miss his queues to be let out like before when they were first partnered together. Those were not good moments for them both. 

Canis dressed in her combat outfit sans her heavy gear load out. She attached the leash to his collar, not forgetting to grab his favorite ball- foregoing his muzzle, and led him from her room to an inner courtyard she saw in passing the night before. Now that the sun was rising, she could see that the courtyard was open with a few benches along the wall. The middle had green grass that was in need of a cut soon. The grass was wet so it must have rained in the middle of the night. There were a few bushes that appeared to have flowers on them but since it was early fall, they had begun to shrivel up and a few had already fallen. 

Canis led Riley to a corner of the yard to do his business. She didn’t want him going all over the place- and not wanting to be discourteous to others. Riley did his business and she cleaned up after him like a responsible handler would and deposited the bag in a trash bin. Then she let him loose and threw his ball to the other side of the courtyard, slowly making her way after it. Riley bolted after the ball, mouthed on it where he got it and ran back for her to throw it again. They played like this for a few minutes. 

She should have realized that he was somewhere behind her before Riley ran past her with a yip. Ghost would always be silent, under all circumstances. Canis made a quick turn to see Ghost sitting on a small bench with Riley’s ball firmly clenched in his skull-gloved hand. Riley’s backend wiggled with the intensity of his tail wagging. He barked a few times, urging Ghost to ‘throw the ball already!’ 

Ghost looked at her. A beam of sunlight passed over the courtyard, illuminating Ghost’s brown eyes into a deep honey. Their identical colored eyes locked in a way that had her taking a deep breath. She nodded her approval to him with a smile and he chucked the ball. Riley was like a bullet trying to get it. 

Canis made her way to where Ghost sat. He scooted over just enough to let her sit next to him. He was manspreading so her knee was lightly touching his thigh. Both of their legs twitched but settled against each other when neither of them said anything. Riley bounded over with his happy self, ball in mouth. He plopped the ball back into Ghost’s open hand again then took off once more when he threw it. 

“He really likes you.” Canis chuckled. “It usually takes him longer to warm up to new people on the teams we’ve joined up with.” 

“Mmm…” Ghost fiddled with a loose string on his black sweater. “I guess I have a way with dogs, then.”

He was teasing her. She looked up at his much larger frame. “Oh, Lieutenant… Riley here can turn at the drop of a single word.” 

He didn’t doubt her there. Ghost’s stomach twitched at her unknowing use of his name. He’d definitely have to get used to that. 

When Riley came back with his ball, Canis had him heel between her legs. “Watch the door, Riley.”

Riley’s ears perked up at the order and his head turned on a swivel to the door. His hackles rose and his lips curled in a silent snarl. Ghost could see that his eyes had an intensity that wasn’t there before while they were playing ball. Riley was a serious dog and he could turn so easily. 

“Release!” After a few seconds, Canis threw his ball into the air and Riley lunged at it breaking his command. He was back to his happy tail-wagging self. It amazed Ghost how easily he transitioned between his working mode and calm mode. Although, he hadn’t seen the full extent of Riley’s abilities, yet. 

Canis looked at her watch. “I should be getting our gear ready for our training session soon… I still need to feed Riley.” She went to stand then turned to Ghost, “I’ll see you later, sir. It was nice seeing you interact with Riley. We can do it again if you want?”

Ghost looked her in the eyes, “Yeah, I want to.”

She gave him a small smile then returned her attention to Riley and reattached his leash to his collar. As they walked back inside, Ghost lowered his gaze to a large paw print imprinted into the wet dirt a few feet from him. The blades of grass glowed as the sun moved higher into the sky. 

Ch.1 | Ch.2 [Here] | Ch.3

🔖 Taglist:

@missroro

[imperial-nuisance-rudje]

if you click the unrebloggable red catboy haterade readmore it's your own damn fault

i am so tired of people trying to defend g'raha's writing in ew

"they're capable of subtlety" switching between being a manipulative asshole and the writer's most perfect prince who can never do wrong and is the wol's bestest friend 5ever (don't look at shb) and never allowing the player/other characters to say "dude wtf" at the former is not "subtle writing", it's complete lack of awareness that the character is being an asshole

like it was bad enough that the writers forced you to be buddy-buddy with him in shb with only a token option of expressing mild distaste , doing that and also making it very clear that he's still a manipulative shithead (because if he was meant to trying to put on a brave face they would have had a "dude wtf" line where he would have apologized in the post-credits, not acted like the promise made under duress was still valid) is just bad fucking writing given that on the other side of the corridor is zenos, who they constantly deny even acknowledgement of his humanity

you can try to compare it to urianger's writing but uri's writing never flinches away from the fact that he's being a fucker when he's being a fucker even when played for comedy, and they still have this gaping gap of not touching the fact that urianger functionally killed thancred's foster daughter/little sister onscreen (while they probably would have realistically hashed it out over like 3 years, you really don't get to see any of that at all so it's very strained; even having thancred still kind of mad before he gets snatched and having the more cordial relationship we normally see during shb would have communicated that better).

idk. so much of ew is just written really damn poorly (even parts that, in isolation, i find acceptable to actively enjoyable (ie the 6.0 zenos cutscenes) end up falling flat in context) because of external factors forcing the sardine treatment for plot points and i'm tired of seeing people pretend that it's not. i can't exactly compare the gameplay side well given i started in 6.0, but i can break down the writing just fine and ew's fucking dire even if you consider how heavily i weigh 4.2-4.3 against stb.

i really hope they sideline the scions besides krile (or tataru, but i think she's probably going to live in side content for a while and krile has been badly neglected for so long). i don't want to interact with g'raha again anytime soon but especially not if his writing remains this bad. either acknowledge that he can be an asshole and let me be colder to him or stop bringing him up, i'm fine hating major recurring characters if they're actually well written (asahi, varis, thordan) and the catboy isn't at this point, and even when he was better-written there was still the major problem of "let me call him a dick or at least untrustworthy you pricks".

"what about estinien don't you like him" if they just have him being a weird hungry vagrant that only shows up sometimes to be deeply strange and get mobbed by baby mamool ja that is ideal, actually, i love when he's a bit of a freak. or they could have him get adopted by another fancy prince, having him repeatedly reel in powerful fancy prince types with the power of

dragon autism

would be the funniest shit on the planet.

but like. i want a break from even the scions i like, barring maybe the twins, and the twins are best when i don't have to refer to them as a unit, yknow? i want new people to take center stage. i'm not going to get that given the trailer, but god. please. make this the erenville-and-wuk lamat show with cameos by the scions and not the other way around. they can come back in 8.0.

(plus, doing that might mean we don't have the fifth expansion straight of y'shtola death fakeouts (i counted: arr/hw (given timing it's hard for me to define where catgirl blunt best belongs), stb (vs Zenos), shb (sailor moon catgirl), ew (ultima thule)). i am so fucking tired of her fakeouts. do literally anything else with her as a character i BEG OF YOU. we all know you aren't killing Miss Final Fantasy 14. her fans would flay you. the merch sales would plummet.)