#im enjoying it so far. but uh. man really just got to a section that monologued what i just had a mental breakdown over a few days ago lol

[anxsity]

forgive me, leonard peacock sure is a book to read in the month of august!

[1010ninetynine]

7 pages into women by charles bukowski. he's like a fanfiction smut writer but bad at it. self indulgent but no emotional charge to the sex, hell, i don't even know why the woman mc's fucking is so sexy. at least try to make me interested in her BODY (you have failed to make the main character interesting bukowski so it's ok. you can just give up on that.)

Spoilers under cut, if you're going to read it, there's rape fyi.

like lydia's poems are bad. all she is is hot. and you're not even giving me much about how exactly she's hot bukowski. im so?? like what is the point. You're a lonely old man who's not gotten laid? is this some fantasy? what am i reading? why am I reading it? why is this the entire book so far? and then he has the audacity to reference how women think he can't write women...women are right. what the fuck is this book?

ok take a look at this section,

"I got up and mixed her one. Lydia lit a long cigarette and sipped at her drink. "You sure look good in that hat," I said. "That purple feather is something." "It's my father's hat." "Won't he miss it?" "He's dead." I pulled Lydia over to the couch and gave her a long kiss."

(women by charles bukowski)

omg wow her father's dead? swoon? im not even understanding why he wants the sex right then? Is he bored of her life story? im so confused.

the most revealing line i think is this "I masturbated regularly, but the idea of having a relationship with a woman-- even on non-sexual terms--was beyond my imagination."

like...the idea of a relationship with a woman being non-sexual needs CLARIFICATION in his eyes. meanwhile the men and women I know are like "ah yes me and my friends who i think are such interesting people." and there's no guarantee of sexual connotation there. Granted, i'm a lonely little virgin too who used to be unsocial, but I don't think I've ever thought of men in this light? Is it that I'm bisexual? i dunno. it's so strange to me.

also uh i'll leave you with this amazing line (tw:rape):

""I think you deserve some love," she said. "I had a dream about you. I opened your chest like a cabinet, it had doors, and when I opened the doors I saw all kinds of soft things inside you--teddy bears, tiny fuzzy animals, all these soft, cuddly things. Then I had a dream about this other man. He walked up to me and handed me some pieces of paper. He was a writer. I took the pieces of paper and looked at them. And the pieces of paper had cancer. His writing had cancer. I go by my dreams. You deserve some love." We kissed again. "Listen," she said, "after you stick that thing inside me, pull it out just before you come. O.K.?" "I understand." I climbed on top of her. It was good. It was something happening, something real, and with a girl 20 years younger than I was and really, after all, beautiful. I did about 10 strokes--and came inside of her."

i don't like catering to this sort of crowd but if you're not going to read all of that - the woman's like omg baby boy you're so lonely 🥺 you need some love. By the way don't get me pregnant pls - and then he's just like, "oh did you want to not have another kid? Sorry but I feel really good right now so I'm just going to risk getting you another pregnancy because you are just a cum dump to me."

like not to go fanfic author on main but - you know the fanfic version of this? It's some guy who's like...wanting to use some other guy but it's like because he's obsessed with that guy specifically. Like, he wants to fuck him, but it's special cause it's him. It's not like...complete disregard it's like "you're going to look so good like this" not JUST "oh it feels better to come inside." like im so serious - fanfiction has this thing where it's like...patriarchal dynamics during sex but never in a way where the "woman" or should i say "bottom" doesn't enjoy every second. i'm sorry if i've disturbed you. i disturb myself. not all fanfiction. sometimes it's not quite so disturbing as rape. it's just...difficult to find. i don't like masturbating to it for that reason.

i feel so disillusioned. i feel like if this is getting published these are the thoughts of so many men. suddenly the pornification of everything makes sense now. it's always been like this huh.

[oikawaplssteponme]

The Apartment: part 7

▪️for parts 1-6, click here

pairing: Kuroo Tetsurou x fem! reader

ratings/warnings: swearing, manhandling (?), drinking (reminder that all characters are aged up and are of legal drinking age), ✨SPICY✨ at the end (implied stuff, 16+ probably is best), you might get some second-hand embarrassment...🤭

synopsis: You knew that living with your three best friends, Kuroo, Oikawa, and Bokuto, would be a wild ride. It’s never a dull moment with those three. Let’s just hope you can keep your huge crush on Kuroo a secret when he is only a room away.

a/n: hi friends!! ahh im really excited to post this part (i think it’s my favorite so far) and i hope you all like it too! this fic is going to be coming to an end soon (just a couple more parts 😔) BUT I’ll let you know when the last part will be. as always, my inbox is open for everything and anything you might need and you can still be added to the taglist for this fic💛 okay enough from me, enjoy xx

p.s. [PLEASE LISTEN TO THE SONG ATTACHED EITHER BEFORE READING OR RIGHT BEFORE THE 4th SECTION BREAK, trust me...]

•

Seven: Careless Whisper

You and Kuroo took the train downtown. He wouldn’t tell you where you were going, except that you would like it. You were still unsure whether or not this was a date, or just his attempt to be nice to you. Regardless, you liked having Kuroo all to yourself.

You walked down the lightly lit streets. Surprisingly it was busy, people bustling around from restaurants to clubs. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy the nightlife.

Kuroo led you to a dark alley, where there was a line of people trying to get inside of a building. Kuroo skipped the line and stood in front of the bouncer.

“Hey back of the line kid,” the guy said. You looked at Kuroo with a concerned expression. Kuroo smiled.

“Kuroo Tetsurou,” he said. The bouncers eyes widened.

“Oh I’m terribly sorry sir. You two enjoy your night.” The bouncer moved from in front of the door to let you two in. You looked at Kuroo, confused.

“Um how did you do that?” You asked. Kuroo laughed.

“Kenma has a lot of connections,” he smirked. You nodded.

Once inside, Kuroo led you downstairs to the scene of blaring music, people dancing, and flashing lights.

“Is this some kind of rave?” You asked.

“You could say that. One of Kenma’s gamer friends owns this club so he lets us come free of charge,” he explained.

“How come you’ve never brought me here before?”

“Well I went with Bokuto, Kenma, and Akaashi once and Bokuto was just a mess so I haven’t been back since. But it’s a good time, trust me.” Kuroo took your hand and led you to the pit.

~

The flashing lights and crowd of people was enough to give you that extra boost of confidence. You looked good and you felt good, so you knew that this was your chance to get Kuroo to see you as more than a friend. You and Kuroo danced carelessly, as if it was only you two in there. He would take your hand and spin you around, admiring this bolder side of you. You felt every beat of the music bounce off your skin. You felt alive in this moment. Kuroo noticed it too.

After maybe an hour of reckless dancing, you got a little thirsty.

“Let’s grab a drink,” suggested Kuroo. You followed him over to the bartender.

“Two gin and tonics, please,” said Kuroo. The bartender nodded and began to prepare your drinks. Kuroo looked devilishly handsome. The thin layer of sweat on his forehead from all the dancing you two had done and his perfectly messy hair was something you never got tired of looking at.

“Here you go.” The bartender placed the drinks in front of you two.

“You can put that on Kenma Kozume’s tab,” said Kuroo. You giggled.

“Cheers?” You held your drink to Kuroo. He smiled and tapped your glasses together.

“Y/N?” Kuroo looked at you tenderly.

“Yeah?” Is he gonna say it?

“I-uh-”

“HI THERE GORGEOUS!” You felt an arm wrap around you, and it certainly wasn’t Kuroo’s. You looked to see a scruffy guy, obviously drunk.

“Excuse me?” You said, pushing the guy away.

“Woah she’s got an attitude! I like it!” The guy said. Kuroo grabbed your arm, pulling you towards him.

“Hey man, leave her alone,” he ordered. The guy laughed.

“Look kid, I’m sure she’d rather be with a man than a boy right now. So why don’t you hit the road?”

Kuroo became instantly aggravated.

“Kuroo, let’s just go,” you whispered. Kuroo moved to stand in front of you.

“I said leave her alone.” He repeated. You started getting nervous.

“Kuroo please-”

“Come on pretty lady, why don’t you spend some time with me-” The guy grabbed your arm and yanked you towards him.

“Get off of me!” You yelled. Before you knew it, you heard a large CRACK and a CRASH.

Kuroo had punched the guy.

In the face.

And now he was unconscious, on the floor.

You gasped, before being led away by Kuroo.

“Sorry dude but I don’t have time for jackasses,” he said. You and Kuroo ran to the emergency exit, forcing the fire alarm on.

“Shit!”

You and Kuroo ran outside but you didn’t make it too far. You were tripping on your own feet from your heels. Kuroo noticed your hurting feet, and picked you up bridal style, running away from the club.

~

Everything happened so fast. You were still trying to process what even happened. Kuroo continued to carry you until you got to the train station. You boarded the train and Kuroo set you down in your seat.

“A-are you okay?” He asked.

“I’m okay, are you okay?” You said softly. Kuroo sighed.

“I can’t believe I brought you there, that was so stupid.”

“Hey it wasn’t your fault. That guy was just a drunk mess. And anyway, I still had fun,” you smiled. You took Kuroo’s hand with yours.

“Wait your hand!” You looked to see that his knuckles were bleeding.

“Oh yeah. I must’ve hit that guy harder than I thought,” he laughed.

“When we get home we should put some ice on it, okay?” You said. Kuroo nodded. Kuroo looked a little distraught. You rested your head on his shoulder.

“Thank you,” you whispered. Kuroo blushed.

~

You took your keys and unlocked the door to your apartment. You headed straight for the freezer, taking a plastic bag and filling it with ice. You went over to Kuroo, who was sitting on the couch.

“Here, give me your hand,” you ordered. Kuroo gave you his beaten up hand and you gently put the ice bag on it. He winced a little at the cold sensation.

“We should probably wrap it with a bandage later too,” you suggested. He nodded. You kept your eyes on Kuroo’s large hand, as it rested on your leg with the ice pack on top. You held the bag in place for him. Kuroo kept his eyes on you, without you even realizing it.

“I didn’t think you had that kind of power in you,” you joked. Kuroo didn’t say anything. He took his free hand and placed it on your cheek. You flinched at his touch and looked at him.

“Kuroo…”

“Y/N…”

You took a deep breath.

“Kuroo I-I’m in love with you. Like deeply in love with you. I’ve never loved anyone but you and I don’t think I ever will. I know this is a long shot and you’ve shut me down before but if I don’t tell you now I don’t think I ever will. You’re my best friend but you’re also so much more to me than that. It’s okay if you don’t feel the same but I can’t hold it in anymore. And that night at the party when Oikawa told everyone that I like you, he was being serious because god damnit Kuroo Tetsurou I like you. Well really, I love you.”

Your heart was beating out of your chest. Your face felt like a million degrees. Kuroo didn’t react. He simply leaned in, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“I know,” he said. Your eyes grew.

“What?”

“I know,” he repeated.

“You know?!”

“Of course I know. I’ve known forever. You’re really bad at hiding your emotions,” he laughed. You were in shock.

“Wait but at the party-”

“I wanted to hear it from you, not Oikawa. I knew you’d tell me when you were ready,” he smiled. Your brain couldn’t process the words coming from his mouth.

“So all this time you’ve just been mentally torturing me?” You huffed. Kuroo laughed.

“Come on Y/N, I know you better than you know yourself. I probably knew you liked me before you did.”

“Oh my god…”

“Well better late than never right?” You looked down and sighed.

“Wait but do you...you know...do you…?” You stuttered out. Kuroo took his index finger and placed it under your chin, tilting your head up to look at him.

“Of course I do. I’d be stupid not to. I love you.”

As soon as the words left Kuroo’s mouth, his lips were pressed against yours. Kuroo shook the ice pack off of his hand and pulled you on top of him. He gripped onto your thighs as you ran your fingers through his messy hair. He tilted his head slightly to kiss you better. Your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer to you. Without realizing it, you started slowly rocking your hips back and forth against him. He let out a faint groan. Kuroo then quickly tucked his arms under your legs and picked you up, leading you to his room.

~

Kuroo laid you down on his bed, hovering over you as he continued to kiss you. You began to unbutton his shirt and tossed it aside. Kuroo lifted your dress over your head and threw it onto the floor. He moved to start kissing and sucking on your neck, doing his best to leave marks on your sensitive skin. You let out faint moans every time he would release his lips from you.

“Kuroo...please…” you sighed. He moved to look at you, kissing your lips.

“What is it baby?”

“I want you,” you said. Kuroo’s eyes grew. He bent back down to kiss you before reaching in his back pocket for his phone.

“What are you doing?” You asked, beginning to unbuckle his belt. Kuroo set his phone down on his nightstand.

“A little music never hurt.”

Kuroo helped you pull his pants down. He hovered above you now just in his boxers. He continued to kiss you passionately, your hands gripped firmly onto his biceps.

Suddenly, the song that began to play seemed vaguely familiar. The saxophone played a tune that you’ve heard before.

Is he playing…

“Kuroo?” You broke away from his kiss. He raised a brow.

“Yeah?”

“Do you know what song this is?” Kuroo tilted his head in confusion.

“Uhh…”

“TONIGHT THE MUSIC SEEMS SO LOUD! I WISH THAT WE COULD LOSE THIS CROWD! BABY!”

You put your hand over your mouth to cover your laughs.

“What? What’s so funny?” asked Kuroo, moving from on top of you.

You bursted out laughing. Kuroo’s face flushed red.

“Kuroo, did you make this playlist?”

“No, Oikawa made it for me.”

You began to laugh even harder.

Oikawa you cruel cruel boy.

“Oh Kuroo, this song is a joke…” you cupped your hands on his cheeks, trying to stop laughing. Kuroo pouted.

“That’s the last time I ever let Oikawa give me music suggestions,” he groaned. You giggled, giving him a kiss.

“You’re so cute and clueless sometimes,” you joked. Kuroo smiled, pulling you back onto his lap.

“Can we still…?” he begged. You laughed and kissed his head.

“Yeah...just please, turn this song off.”

•

[taglist OPEN: @vangoghpoets @vangoghmusings @lilnuances @tetsoleil @cloudswritings @foxyyychan @tamaguchi @jessie9008 @bitandbytes @yeehawnana @166cm @bigchaosenergy @tumbledor3 @captain-janeway @answer-the-sirens @simpletype @ysatrap @stinkybitch1919 @starry-magicshop @graykageyama @keomoon @freyafolkvangr @myherotrashbin @anejuuuuoy @amgoldena @aisawa-reo @moonlightaangel @bokutory ]

[arhvste]

OIKAWA TOORU - YOUR KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOUR 

okay, okay, i know i said i post no requests or updates on a saturday night BUT one of the boyfie hcs have been stuck in my head and i couldn’t help myself whoops

summary - the library is one of the last places you want to be but the day you finally encounter the pretty boy of the school oikawa tooru, you suddenly find yourself thankful for having homework to complete - fluff

this is for @totorosleaff​ i love and appreciate you a lot <3

warnings - none

-

internally screaming you stared down at the papers scattered across the table you were sat on. you felt like you’d been slaving away with a pen for hours upon hours when in reality you had only arrived 2 hours ago, including all the breaks you took inbetween.

you wanted to scream at the amount of assignments you had been set, you couldn’t blame anyone other than yourself though. you weren’t a total slacker but every time you tried to complete work at home, you’d find yourself distracted by the unspoken calls and pleas coming from netflix begging you to binge all the studio ghibli films they’d put on there. today you finally decided it was time to finally pay a visit to the dreaded library and to your surprise you were managing to get a lot done; you still weren’t enjoying yourself though.

staring down at the papers, you noticed you needed a book related to the module you were studying. you clicked your tongue silently cursing yourself for forgetting to bring your own material. 

you quietly stood up and wandered around the tall, towering maze of bookcases, eyes scanning for the genre and title you were looking for. after a good 10 minutes you finally found the section the book you needed was supposed to be left in. your eyes danced over all the books until you finally spotted it.

4 shelves too high for you to reach.

“why do the library advertise borrowing books when they put the stupid things too high for you to take anyway?” you quietly muttered under your breath as you looked around for a small step ladder or stool. no luck.

despite the situation being utterly hopeless, you still attempted to the for the book. balancing on your tip toes and stretching your arm as high as it would go, your finger tips skimmed the base of the 4th shelf. just a little more stretching surely.

your fingers lightly touched the spine of the book you needed. you mentally praised yourself as you got ready for one last stretch in order to finally grab the book and make it yours. 

a hand reached over the top of your head, pulling the book out effortlessly. shocked you spun around with a glare plastered across your face.

“i don't know if the stretching and balancing was obvious or not, but i was clearly struggling to get that book so it’s only fair i get it”

you heard a small laugh from above you as your eyes widened.

“it was the cute little grunts and whines that made it obvious you were struggling”

there towered the well known setter and captain of the boys volleyball team, oikawa tooru. your mind went blank as he smiled down at you, book still firmly in his grip.

“you’re lucky i, your knight in shining armour, happened to notice you or you have never gotten the book or back to your work.”

his silky voice brought you out of your trance as he place the book into your hands. 

finally looking up at him, oikawa gave his typical closed eyed charming smile at you. that was until he opened his eyes and got a clear view of your face. his smiled dropped as a genuine look of interest replaced the smile he previously held.

sure, there were pretty girls around school, hell, he even had pretty girls approach him outside of school, but you? you were something else. he’d never seen such natural beauty before. his eyes glittering as he stared into your own, he felt like he was staring into a million constellations when he looked into your eyes. how had he never seen you before?

“yeah? well thanks, uh, oikawa? yeah, no thanks for that”

you gave a small, confused smile as you turned away to make your way back to your table.

you felt your wrist being gently grabbed as you stopped yourself from yelping when you got pulled back slightly.

“whoops! s-sorry! i just wanted to ask, what class are you in?”

“3B”

“oh yeah! you’re in iwa-chans class aren't you?”

“iwa-chan? oh, iwaizumi-san? yeah i am”

“he never told me there was such a pretty girl in his class”

“probably because he’s not shallow and doesn't care”

“um ouch? am i not allowed to compliment ones physical appearance?”

“not when you tell every other girl that”

“incorrect. im polite to other girls, but im an honest man, and i honestly think you are gorgeous”

you snickered at this. was THE oikawa tooru really trying to flirt with you in an isolated library isle?

“well, i honestly need to get back to my work now so... i guess it was nice meeting you? thanks for the book”

“let me work with you!”

you turned around again and stared at the brunette.

“i hate it here, i can’t focus please let me work with you”

you dramatically sighed and grabbed his arm.

“well since you did come to my rescue, i suppose i can offer a seat at my table for the poor boy in front of me”

“you’re literally sitting alone”

“you a stalker or something?”

oikawa laughed quietly and allowed you to lead you back to your table, covered with books and papers.

“i’ll go grab my stuff, i’ll be right back”

oikawa left and you glanced his way as he quietly meandered his way 3 tables over. so he wasn't a stalker, he wasn't sat to far originally, he would've seen you were sat alone.

“finally understand that i wasn't stalking you yes?”

“shut it, we’re in a library don’t talk to me”

you smiled, no ill intention behind your words as the setter took his seat opposite you, laying his own work out across the table. he hummed in amusement as he settled down and got back into his own work.

before you knew it, the two of you were deeply immersed in your own pieces of work as you hastily worked through your assignments, you both stealing glances at each other when you thought the other wasn’t looking and engaging in small conversation with oikawa from time to time.

“okay but what's your favourite film?”

“any studio ghibli one”

“if you had to pick?”

“howls moving castle”

oikawa’s eyes twinkled as he learnt more and more about you, enjoying the little comments and questions you’d ask each other. you also found oikawa was nothing like you’d heard. iwaizumi had mentioned to you that ‘shittykawa’ was “annoying and insufferable” but you found oikawa’s company particularly comforting.

finally completing your work, you felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders.

you stretched and sighed quietly in happiness as a lazy smile spread across your face. oikawa looked up and put his own pen down looking at the material he’d produced over the past 3 hours.

“we’ve been here forever” you whispered looking around the now increasingly empty library. the sky had been painted a dreamy section of colours as the windows allowed the pinks, yellows and oranges in the sky, cast a soft golden light through the hall.

“it felt better working with you” oikawa smiled so genuinely it made your heart warm.

“agreed.”

the two of you packed up your stuff and headed out together. the two of you walked beneath the picturesque sky. oikawa had a soft smile painted across his face as he looked at you. 

being the gentleman he is, he walked you home after insisting he was raised with understanding it was polite and responsible to do such a thing. giving in, you allowed him to walk back to your house, conversation flowing as you walked. when you finally reached your house you turned to him and smiled.

“well, this is me, thank you for walking me home oikawa-san, i’m glad we both got our work done. well, see you around school i guess.”

you smiled politely and turned to go into your house until his voice made you halt.

“hey, y/n-chan?”

“yeah?”

“would you wanna study together more often?”

“like study dates” you teased at him.

“i wanna take you on real dates too, only if you’ll let me of course”

“...i think i’d like that. my knight in shining armour.”

[thetomorrowshow]

a jig in plaited time

Happy holidays, @under-the-blue-moonlight ! I really enjoyed writing up some intrulogical content for you (and this may actually get additional chapters lol, I’m really happy with it).

Here is your @sanderssidesgiftxchange gift!

ships: Intrulogical, background Royality

cw: anxiety, intrusive thoughts, panic attack, mannequins, mentions of food

~

Why was Remus at the mall?

That was a simple question, with a just as simple answer. He was at the mall for a suit and tie, one he needed for his brother's wedding. It needed to be “salmon” or whatever, with a blue tie.

A much less simple answer was to the next question.

Why was Remus at the mall on Black Friday?

In all honesty, Remus hadn't known about Black Friday until he arrived. He hadn't really had a good feeling about it on the way here, but he'd paid no mind to his instincts. He didn't often have a good feeling about anything. There had been far too many cars for this time of morning on a weekday. What had really tipped him off, though, was the huge sign in the window of Nordstrom's.

'BLACK FRIDAY SALE!'

Even at that point he wasn't entirely sure what that meant. It became far more clear when he entered the building to find it absolutely packed. Well, there could be an upside to this. Maybe there would be a sale on the suit he needed.

Remus hadn't been this close to someone since he was in the womb, and he could not say that he was very comfortable with it. Remus didn't care much for close spaces and touching people, he hadn't since middle school. It just made him feel sort of icky.

As soon as possible, he ducked out of Nordstrom's, only to find that the rest of the mall was in a similar condition. JC Penney actually looked worse. Normally when Remus was feeling overwhelmed, he'd sidle into Hot Topic or somewhere else with obnoxiously loud music. By drowning his feelings in the noise, he generally was able to recollect himself. The mall was certainly loud, but not in a good way at all. Even if he tried to find someplace with music, he wouldn't be able to enjoy it with all these people.

Remus was stressed. But he needed this suit, seeing as his brother's wedding was literally tomorrow. Why did he leave it this late? Well, Remus knew he was nothing if not a master procrastinator. He also knew he couldn’t be the only one.

Remus waded his way through the crowd to a relatively people-free corner and wiggled his phone out of the pockets of his definitely too-small jeans (not that he'd admit they were too small out loud—his brother had told him they were on every occasion he wore them) and texted the wedding group chat.

Remus: hey im at the mall. anything yall need?

Robro: Why are you at the mall on black friday?

Patty-Cake: ooh can you get me a pair of sunglasses? Mine broke last week

Remus: sure. stuff for wedding?

Robro: idk. Let me ask mom

Remus shoved his phone back in his pocket, then extracted it again as it buzzed a moment later.

Robro: Yeah mom says get some classy decor or something

Ant: I don't think remus knows what classy means

Remus: shut up i got this

Toby: wait what's going on? It's like 10am why are you all awake

Robro: idk if you knew this tobes but I'm getting married tomorrow

Toby: shut up man

Ant: even Remy knows

Sleep: even i know loser

Remus: toby do u need help

Toby: I hate it heeere

Patty-Cake: Aw Toby that isn't very nice! And good morning everyone!

Robro: hello sunshine!! <3

Sleep: i need you both to not start that

Remus: get a room dorks

Okay, classy decor. Sunglasses for the groom. Pink suit. Blue tie. Probably some dress shoes. A wedding present. Dress socks too. Did Remus need to have a tie pin? He'd ask later. Napkins, definitely. No one ever had enough napkins at events. Did he need to have a pocket handkerchief?

Remus checked the list of what his suit needed that Roman had sent him a month or two ago. Yes, a blue pocket square. This was a lot.

Remus swallowed back his sudden panic and took a few deep breaths, jamming his still-buzzing phone back into his pocket. He could do this. Sunglasses first, there was a Sunglasses Hut within eyesight. All he had to do was fight through the crowd.

He reached the kiosk with few incidents and surveyed the sleek glasses for five minutes before seeing a pair that were shaped like a cartoon frog. Patton would love those. And if he didn't, then Remus just got a neat pair of sunglasses! He purchased the glasses and moved on to the next place to conquer.

-

By the time Remus was back at Nordstrom's, he was completely out of energy. Nordstrom's had two levels, and so much stuff, and so many people. He still had to get the suit and socks, and the wedding present. Maybe it seemed like he hadn't done much, but he had actually done a lot, considering how busy the mall was. He'd barely escaped a fistfight outside of the electronics store. The fact that he'd been able to get shoes and so-called 'classy decor' and napkins? Remus was pretty proud, all things considered.

Nordstrom's was even busier than when he left, which was certainly distressing. Remus couldn't even see any clothes. Was that a mannequin or a really tall lady? Was that the escalator, or a bunch of people climbing on top of each other?

What if I set off a bomb right here? Would the whole tower fall down, the ones on top not actually hurt until they hit the ground?

Remus shook off the intrusive thought. This was getting bad. It was already almost one—that meant that not only was he stressed, but he was getting hungry. His thoughts would continue to devolve until he got out of here and got some food.

I could eat that man! That would certainly clear the place out, and I'm sure he's delicious!

Remus groaned. He needed to sit down, but there were no seats free anywhere. He hefted his bags higher on his shoulders and forged on. He had to get this suit, or else the wedding would be ruined. The man in question (who was fairly attractive) bumped him, and Remus had to close his eyes to fight his brain. This was getting out of hand.

There was a little square cut out in the wall where a headless mannequin stood, no doubt showing off the latest in boys' fashion. Remus ducked between its legs and pushed his back up against the wall, knees drawn up close to his chest. He pulled out his phone with some difficulty.

Remus: hey so ro does my suit need a tie pin

Robro: Don't worry abt it, mom got matching tie pins for everyone

Sleep: ree babes are you buying ur suit now?

Remus: shut up

Sleep: on black friday?

Remus: no

Ant: did you even know it was black friday

Remus: ...

Toby: wait the wedding is tmrrw

Robro: Believe me tobias I'm aware

Remus: yah ik im not buying the whole suit just shoes

Robro: Good I almost had a heart attack, you almost certainly wouldn't be able to find one

Now truly panicking, Remus dropped his phone onto his stomach and buried his fists in his hair. How was he supposed to find a salmon suit and a blue tie, as well as nice socks? Plus a wedding present? Especially in this crowd, when he had no clue where to even look for a suit. And he still had to go to the party tonight, then the wedding tomorrow, and it was so loud. Everyone was yelling over each other, and Remus couldn't even hear his own thoughts—except the bad ones. Why did he have to put this off so long? He needed out, he wasn't going to be able to get any of the stuff, he was going to ruin the wedding, like he ruined everything—

“Hello, may I help you?”

Remus looked up—at least, as up as he could look, with a mannequin just above him—to see a bespectacled store clerk looking down at him. 'Logan', his nametag read.

Remus opened his mouth, then closed it again before a string of curses could come out. He really wasn't doing well. There was just too much, too much everything.

“Is there anything I can help you find?” Logan asked, his voice rumbling a bit—or maybe it was the thunder of people in the shop. Whatever it was, it made Remus's stomach drop a little.

“Um, uh, pink!” If Remus had any shame, he would have slapped his own face. As it was, he started trying to pantomime a suit while stuck in a tiny hollow in the wall. Logan watched kindly, his face not betraying the disgust he was probably feeling.

“Pink what? Shirt?” Logan guessed. Remus shook his head, running his hands down his legs. Pants too, pants too.

“Pink . . . coat? Shorts? Pants?”

Remus traced back over his arms, almost crying. Here he was, bothering this poor clerk with his stupid non-verbal self.

“A pink suit?”

Remus jumped for joy, hitting his head on the crotch of the mannequin, instantly shuddering at the thoughts that flooded into his head. Logan held out a hand, and Remus took it, allowing himself to be pulled out of the wall.

“I can direct you to the suit section, right this way.”

Remus let himself be led by Logan, who occasionally looked back to make sure he was still there. The man had a curly mop of dark hair, and was slightly shorter than he was—not that it was a problem. Or anything important. Remus wasn't looking for a date. He was inconveniencing a store clerk on Black Friday. Although, he did need a plus one for the wedding. . . .

No, it was out of the question. He didn't even know this man. Roman would be upset if he ruined the wedding even more by showing up with some rando who would probably jump in the wedding cake or spill food all over the nice tablecloths or turn out to be really ugly because he was just wearing a mask made of someone else's face.

“Here is where the suits are. Do you need anything else?”

Remus stared at him, his mouth opening and shutting a few times. He wanted to say something stupid, like yeah, I need those eyes in my life, or something far more obscene, but he was okay. He could do this. He could survive peopling.

Logan gave him a sympathetic smile. “I can help you find the right suit, if that's what you require.”

Before he could stop himself, Remus was nodding. He let Logan pull him past a crying couple and two arguing families to a rack of suit coats that were red.

“Will these suffice?” the clerk asked, gesturing at them. Remus frowned. They weren't pink. Was the man messing with him? Seeing his look, Logan checked the tag and groaned. “Apologies, I'm colorblind. I could have sworn these were pink. Hopefully the last customer who I pointed this way was not upset.”

That was a joke, right? Remus almost laughed, but knew if he did he would start crying. Logan led him through the crowd with seemingly unending patience, occasionally smiling gently at him. Remus felt his heartrate spike every time one of those smiles was sent his way, but for a reason completely unrelated to the overpowering noise and crowd.

Logan found him a probably very nice pink suit—Remus wasn't really looking at it. Then Logan was kind enough to let him into an employee restroom to try it on, seeing as the dressing rooms had a line that ran all the way to the front doors. It fit nicely, tight (though not as tight as his jeans) and sleek, accompanied with a blue tie that Logan had found while he was changing.

“That looks very sharp on you, sir,” Logan informed him, as Remus blushed.

“Remus,” he blurted out. Logan raised his eyebrows.

“After the character in Roman mythology?” asked Logan, his tone betraying something like excitement. Remus nodded, then looked down at the tie.

“We—didn't look at—at ties yet,” he stammered, trying to make his voice work. “Where—?”

“Ah, it happens to be one of mine,” Logan said. For the first time, he looked a little uncomfortable. “I keep one in my locker for emergencies, and I thought it would look nice on—it would look nice. With the suit.”

Remus finally found the courage to smile back. “Thanks, Specs. Uh, sorry for taking up so much of your time. I'll just buy this, it's dope.”

“Oh no, I do not at all mind assisting you,” Logan said quickly. “At least I don't have to deal with . . . whatever is going on.”

“You could assist me by being my date!”

Logan stared.

Remus clapped a hand over his mouth.

“. . . What?”

“Nothing, nothing nothing,” said Remus. “I just—um—you need to get your tie back right? And I—if you let me, of course—I could just wear it, save money and all that, and you could come and then take it home so that I don't steal it or whatever?” He scrunched his eyes up, turning away so as to catch no sight of Logan rejecting him. Why did he have to say that? The noise pressed down on him again; despite still being in the staff restroom, it was almost too loud to bear.

“Wear it . . . where?”

Remus would already be curled up on the floor were it not for the very un-purchased suit he was currently wearing. “Um, my brother's wedding tomorrow?” he chanced, hands clenched over his eyes.

The utter disbelief in Logan's voice was clear as a bell. “You are buying a suit . . . for a wedding . . . that is tomorrow. On Black Friday, of all days.”

Tears choked Remus's throat. “Y-yeah, I'm really bad at planning.” Why was he even asking this cute clerk out anyway? Just because Roman kept teasing him for not having a date to the wedding? Or did he actually have a crush on Logan?

He searched his feelings briefly, and found almost instantly that he for sure had a crush. Okay, that was a lot to deal with right now. They had just met! It was just . . . the way he smiled at him, the way he didn't abandon him even though he'd been having a panic attack for about an hour at this point, how gentle and kind he was. Not to mention how put-together he was. And his hair? That was just hot.

Now though, just seconds after realizing he liked Logan, the guy was going to reject him because he had run his stupid mouth. Remus cringed. The silence had gone on for far too long.

“Well, I expect you to pick me up an hour before the event begins. I do not currently have my own means of transportation. You are quite fortunate that I do not work tomorrow.”

Wait.

What?

“You—you really—?” Remus's voice broke. He jumped as Logan lay a warm hand over his own, which were still pressed into his eyes.

“Of course,” Logan said kindly. “I know very little about you, but I rather feel that—and no offense meant—you will be distressed at such a large event as a wedding. I would love to continue to assist you.” He coughed, then added, “Also, the streak in your hair is very attractive.”

Remus almost sighed in relief. This was okay. He let Logan pull his hands away from his face, then ran a sleeve over his eyes and nose. Logan froze.

“Well, now you have to buy that suit,” Logan said. As an aside, he muttered, “At least it looks good on you.”

“Aw, Lo, you think I look hot?” Remus asked shakily, managing a smile. “What about my jeans? Think I look good in tight clothes?”

Logan turned away, unfortunately letting go of Remus's hands, the tips of his ears turning pink. “Are you always this insufferable?”

Remus slung an arm around his shoulder. “Yep! And you're stuck with me for a whole date!”

Logan pushed his glasses up his nose. “If it doesn't work out, we can just pretend we never met, if you like. We will both move on with our lives. There is no obligation that comes with this date, we are both free to back out at any time.”

Remus quickly retracted his arm from Logan's shoulder, then nodded. That made sense. He did like Logan, and he didn't want to upset him. Shameless flirting was definitely on the table, though.

“When's your lunch break?” Remus asked, as casually as possible. Logan snorted.

“I only have a twenty minute lunch today, they don't want me to leave them without as much help as possible.” Logan went to open the door and exit the restroom, then glanced back. “One o'clock. I plan on getting a sandwich at the Subway in the hall outside of the store. It would be wonderful if someone would wait in line for me and order me an Italian BMT and a bag of potato chips, so that I am not late in returning.”

Remus grinned. Easy-peasy, and just like that he would get to spend some time with Logan before the wedding.

Logan made to leave, but Remus grabbed his arm. “One sec, hot stuff,” he said, butterflies racing through his stomach at Logan's blush, “not to bother you any more or anything, but do you have any suggestions for a wedding present?”

The utter disbelief on Logan's face completely wiped out any blush that had been there. “The wedding is tomorrow, Remus.”

Remus's breath caught. Logan said his name. It sounded so beautiful coming from him. If a heavenly chorus had been singing around him at that moment, it would have been dull compared to Logan saying his name.

Logan sighed. “Of course I have some ideas. Do you need anything else?”

Remus pulled himself together, then grabbed his phone from the pile of his clothes on the floor. He checked the list, ignoring the notifications from the group chat.

“Uh, yeah. A pocket square to match the tie, and some nice socks.”

“That's doable. Tell me about your brother and his partner while we find those items. Perhaps you and I can put together an ideal gift.” Logan stepped out of the restroom to give Remus privacy while he changed back into his clothes. Remus shucked the suit off as quickly as possible. All the intense stimulation had blurred into the background, Logan being the only buzz he needed to keep going.

Remus didn't often have a good feeling about anything, but this? Oh yeah, there was definitely something good here.

[thewalkingdead-fan101]

In this hell Daryl Dixon X Reader part 9/??

Hey guys! 

Its finally time for part 9, I really hope you guys enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it! It turned out a little bit longer than I anticipated! I hope everyone is safe, and healthy and I just want to wish you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and Seasons Greetings! Thank you for being patient and so lovely!

Warnings- Slow burn, General Walking Dead stuff, Blood, Gore, Swearing, Shane descending further into insanity, walkers, Sophia.

I looked to my left, spotting Dale looking at me worriedly.

I place a hand on my chest, wiping my fore head with my free hand.

“I-I uh, I heard most of it.. if not all of it.” “I’m sorry.” Dale shook his head. “No, Dont be.. I should thank you..”

“Thank me?” “For showing me that, that is who my brother is now.” “(Y/n), if I’d known you were there I wouldn’t have said anything.” “I heard him threaten you Dale. I’ve noticed the change in Shane since Atlanta, You don’t have to try to cushion this.”

“I didn’t mean for you to find out this way.”

I sighed, walking over to Dale, hugging the older man.

“It’s not your fault Dale… It’s his own.” I softly spoke.

Dale had started to relax, softly patting my shoulder.

We both pulled back from the hug and shared a soft smile.

“I’ve got to go, Sorry Dale.”

“No, you go on.” He nodded. 

I turned away and made my way to the house.

I searched for my brother on the way back to see the others, sighing with relief as I don’t see him anywhere.

A strong scent drifted throughout the house, the source coming from the kitchen.

The stairs softly creaked as I made my way up to the second floor, Carol smiling at me as she noticed me.

“Ill take that for you.” She rubbed my shoulder, taking the towel from my hands.

“Thank you.” “I need to keep myself occupied, im starting to go stir crazy.” She softly chuckled, retreating back towards the bathroom.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the door to the guest room open, Daryl emerging.

“Hey you.” I smiled as I turned around.

“Hey.” He nodded, his head motioning to follow him to the room.

I sat on the bed as I watched Daryl pull his vest on over his tank.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“Spoke to Hershel.” “Oh… what did he say?” 

“He don’t like me in ‘ere. Said I can go back with ya.” “Oh, is that so?” I smirked, getting up making my way over to him.

His eyes were locked on me, as if he were a hawk zoning in on its prey.

I softly placed my hands onto the front of his vest, straightening it out. I glanced up to find his eyes already fixed onto me. “What?” “Nothing.” He shook his head. I smiled as I dropped my hands from his chest, only to have Daryl’s hands reach down to get a hold of mine. I looked down, watching as my fingers intertwined with his.

“Look at me.” Daryl muttered. I glanced up and smiled once again, watching his face intently.

“What are ya’ smiling at?” “You, Im just glad that you’re okay.” “It’ll take a lot more than a dumb horse to keep me down.” He mumbled. “You’re only human Daryl.” “Nothing gets by ya’ does it?” He joked lightly.

I chuckled and playfully shoved his chest, moving toward the door.

Daryl’s hands grabbed my waist, pulling me back into his embrace as he playfully ran his hands along my sides, a squeal leaving my throat as he took advantage of his surprise assault, setting me on the bed to continue his attack.

“Daryl, Da-“ I cut myself off with a string of laughter, his fingers digging further into my side.

“No, No stop-“ I continued to laugh. After a few moments, his hands stopped as he moved them both up to cradle my face, pressing a soft kiss against my lips. I pulled back, a smirk evident. “You sure got some nerve Dixon.” I shook my head, smile tugging on my lips. He tilted his head as he looked at me. “Thinking you can kiss a lady after putting your hands on her like that.” I smirked. “Lady? I ain’t seen no lady.” He smirked back. “Oh you shit!” I laughed as I lightly smacked his shoulder, causing him to laugh the slightest bit more.

My heart swelled as I watched him laugh, truly carefree in this moment. I can’t help but think about how beautiful he is, the way his eyes slightly sparkle, and how his nose scrunches up, accenting the way his skin slightly crinkles by his eyes, and with each rumble of laughter that emits from his chest his teeth become that little bit more visible. The more I stare at him, the deeper my love for him grows.

I reached my hand up and gently brushed the hair out of his eyes. “Dont be gettin’ all sappy on me now.” Daryl teased. “It’s hard not to sometimes.” I smiled.

He rolled his eyes as he leant in for another kiss. Before his lips connected with mine, there was a cough coming from the doorway. My attention moved to the door, where I saw Hershel standing, annoyance clear to read on his features. Daryl sighed, dropping his head to rest against my shoulder briefly, before pushing himself up. “Hershel, hi.” I softly smiled. “I think it’s for the best if the two of you left now.” He nodded towards Daryl and I. “Oh, Of co-“ “Don’t worry, we’re leaving old man.” Daryl cut me off before I had a chance to say anything else, grabbing the little amount of belongings that he’d had with him in the room, pushing past Hershel.

I looked over to Hershel and stood from the bed. “I’m sorry Hershel, he-“ “I have rules in this house. Rules of which I expect the people that live under this roof, ‘guests’ included to follow.” He stated, shaking his head head as he left. I glanced down, only to see one of Daryls discarded shirts on the floor at the end of the bed. I bent down, collecting the stray shirt and left the now vacant room.

The rest of the after noon had flown by, we were all seated by the small campfire, in the middle of our tents and vehicles, eating beans and rice, courtesy of Maggies gift basket to Glenn, who still seems to be feeling bad about whatever it was that the gift pack was given to him for.

I looked over to see Lori sitting with her little family, her eyes made short contact with my own as she did a small nod.

I subtly watched Rick, noticing that he kept stealing little glances at his wife abdomen, lifting her hand to press a soft kiss against the skin there, giving her a soft smile when she looked over to him.

Daryl was sitting on top of the RV, after deciding that we needed a watch while we had the fire lit, preferring a little bit of alone time too. Glenn was sitting with Dale and T-dog, all talking about the differences in the wiring and production of Dales RV compared to others. Andrea and Carol were quietly chatting, in between myself and Shane, the latter sat beside Andrea, the most sour look on his face. I followed his gaze, only to realise that it’s his ‘Best friend’ on the receiving end of his glare. I lightly sighed as I stood, picking up my plate, collecting everyone else’s that had finished and taking it to the tub. 

“You alright there baby sis?” Shane spoke up from behind me. I continued to wash the dishes, I turned to grab his, only for Shane to pull them out of my reach. “Yeah, im fine. Why wouldn’t I be?” “Just checking up on you is all.” He smiled. “We haven’t seen much of each other.” He finished. “What are you talking about? We went on a run together this morning.” “It doesn’t matter.” He laughed.

“Okay, can you give me your dishes now?” I asked as I rolled my eyes. “No I can’t, now just listen to me, you can do the dishes later.” He chuckled passing me the dish towel to dry my hands and placing his dishes in the sink. I took the dish towel from him and wiped my hands, hanging it back over the makeshift rail we have. “What do you want Shane? Im tired and I want to finish my job and goto bed.” I sighed.

“Right, well, I uh- I found this when Andrea and I went out earlier.” He mumbled, pulling a decently sized book from behind his back. I took a step towards Shane, eyeing him and the book suspiciously. “Shane, you didn’t-“ “Shut up, take the damn book.” he waved the book up and down in front of me.

I reached out and took the book from his hands, examining the book.

The book had a thin layer of dust covering it, other than the fingerprints where Shane had previously held it. The top right corner of the book was slightly bent, the edges lightly deteriorated, the pages now a slight cream colour instead of the pristine white they once would’ve been. I blew the dust off of the cover, softly wiping it. “Your pregnancy: Week by week.” I read aloud. “Yeah, I read a little bit of the about author section, the guy who wrote it is a baby doctor.” “An OB/GYN?” I asked. “Yeah that, seems to know his stuff.” He nodded as I turned the book over to have a skim through the blurb. “Thank you.” I smiled softly, giving him a small side hug. “Dont mention it.” He replied patting my back. I pulled back and looked at him, only for Shane to now look at my abdomen. “What?” “How far along are you now?” He asked.

I thought for a moment before looking back to Shane. “How long has it been since the CDC?” “Four weeks, three days.” He nodded, his gaze moving toward the campfire. “Then that makes me-“ I paused, calculating in my head.

“Nine weeks and three days.” I finished. “Give or take a few days.” I added. “Well shit.” He chuckled. “Yeah, little bean is growing quickly, still seems like it was only yesterday I was peeing on a stick at the quarry.” I joked. Shane said quiet for a second, deep in his mind. “It was a lot different back then, I wish it was like that again.” I watched as he shot daggers at Rick. “Do you mean back when Rick wasn’t in the picture?” I asked. I heard a sharp inhale and watched as Shane’s whole demeanour changed. “No. How could you even say that?” His eyes bore into me. “Im sorry, you’ve just been acting different.” I sighed, placing the book down on the chair, turning and moving towards the tub once more. His rough hand grabbed onto my upper arm, his grip harsh as he spun me to face him. “Shane-“ “You don’t know anything.” He cut me off. “Rick is my best friend.” He sneered, his grip on my arm tightening. “Shane, let me g-“ I tried to talk. “You have no business asking this.” He looked me up and down, disgusted. “Shane.” I warned, looking around us. “You think im not happy my best friend is alive?” his grip was now tighter than it was previously, I could feel my arm starting to throb under his hold. “Shane, you need to let me go.” I stated sternly. “I’ll let you go when you let go of this stupid idea you go stuck in your little head.” He pulled me closer, speaking down to me. “Let me go Shane.” “You’ve been spending too much time with Dale.” He paused. “He is filling your head with this Horse shit!” He sneered, throwing my arm away from his grip, storming off. I watched my brother storm off, kicking the ground as he neared his tent, barging through the material. I shook my head, glancing at the book before going back to finishing the dishes. As soon as I finished washing and drying the dishes, I wiped my hands once more and moved to pick up the book, making my way back over to the small group, absentmindedly rubbing my arm. “Hey guys, im going to head to bed.” I smiled softly. I heard a chorus of goodnights, and looked over to Lori, who had looked over to me and smiled. “Goodnight sweetie.” She looked over to my arm and sent me a questioning glare. I softly shook my head, causing her to sternly look at me. I turned and made my way towards the RV. Daryls attention instantly landed on me, brow raised.

“What do ya’ want?” “I was just coming to say night.” I smiled up at him. “Ok.” “Ill see you later?” I asked, in which he only responded with a short nod. I made my way back to my tent, as I entered it I placed the book down on my bed, turning to get dressed. “Oh Jesus Christ.” I gasped, my hand making its way to my chest as I saw Lori, sitting on the small chair near my back pack of clothes, a worried expression on her face. “What?” I asked, noticing her gaze looking me up and down, before fixating onto my arm. “What happened?” She asked, standing up and making her way over to me. “Nothing, im okay Lori.” “Did Daryl do this?” “Oh my god no!” I laughed, quickly changing my tone to serious when I notice she wasn’t messing around. “No, Lori, No. Daryl didn’t do this.” “Who did?” She asked, coming closer to examine my arm.

I followed her hands as they reached out and grabbed my arm, seeing the red print on my arm, a purple shade already developing on the irritated skin.

“Are you going to tell me what happened?” “Shane happened, it doesn’t hurt though.” I smiled. She lightly pressed her index finger against the skin, causing me to flinch. “It doesn’t hurt though.” She mocked, a small smile evident on her face. “What happened (Y/n)?” “We were just roughhousing.” I lied, not wanting her to get involved, well anymore than what she already is. She nodded her head, a little suspicious, but not pressing the conversation further. I took a seat on the bed and picked up the book, looking up at Lori. “He got me this.” “Shane?”

“Yeah, said he found it on a run.” “Thats surprising.” “I’d say, considering he has the ‘If it’s not essential, it’s not worth bringing back.’ Rule.” I laughed. Lori laughed along with me. “Alright Honey, if you need anything, come get me.” She hugged me. “Night Lori.” I smiled hugging her back. Once she had left, I flipped the book open, flicking through the first few weeks which were neatly typed onto separate pages, in their own chapters. It didn’t take long to find Chapter/Week Nine.

At the top of the page it had a small chart with the baby’s information, and in big bold lettering I read: 9 Weeks Pregnant; Your baby is as big as a green olive.

I stayed up and continued to read.

This is the week that your baby develops out of their embryonic stage and officially enters the foetal period.

The baby’s liver, the spleen and the gallbladder are all under construction now, as well as the baby’s tiny muscles are forming.

I absentmindedly started to caress my abdomen as I continued to read. 

While it's too early to feel any kicks yet, it's not too early to hear something, your baby's heartbeat might be audible on a doppler machine! “Yeah as if id have access to that.” I scoffed.

The spinal cord "tail" at your baby-to-be's rump has all but disappeared! Your baby is looking more and more like a tiny human.

I continue reading the next few pages, taking in all of the information about Bean, not even noticing Daryls presence until I feel an arm slide over my stomach.

I put the book down, making sure to save the page im on.

“Hey.” He mumbled into my ear, as a turned to face him.

“Hey.” “I thought ya’ were going to bed..” “I did, but I got caught up reading.” “Oh yeah? What?” “Just some baby stuff.” He nodded. “Baby Dixon is the size of an Olive.” I yawned, Daryl yawning after me. “Ain’t that big.” He said, laying on his back, moving his arm behind his head, his other arm pulling me into him, closing his eyes. I looked up to respond but heard his light snores, signalling he fell into an instant sleep. I leant over his chest and turned the dim lantern off, snuggling back into Daryl.

The next morning I woke up, seeing Daryl in a deep sleep beside me. I carefully climbed over him, checking to see if he was disrupted once both feet were on the ground, watching as he grumbled and rolled over, facing my side. I quickly dressed, pulling on some shoes, exiting the tent. I made my way to the supply tent, running into Lori who had just walked out, a toilet roll in hands. “Morning.” She smiled. “Morning.” “You need to use this too?” She asked, lifting the Toilet paper. “You know I do.” I chuckled.

We both walked away, towards the second field near the stables, tucked away in an area with a little more privacy.

“I didn’t think you’d be awake this early.” She smirked, turning around as I squatted.

“Oh really? Why is that?” I asked, as she handed me the roll, taking what I needed. “Well, your first night back with Daryl.” She suggested. Even looking at the back of her head I could sense her grin. “Nothing like that happened.” I shook my head smiling at her antics, finishing my business, standing up. I walked over to where she stood, switching positions. “So, nothing happened?” She asked. “No, we just had a little bit of small talk, and fell asleep.” “So, did you end up reading any of that book last night?” “Yeah, I read the complete chapter covering the ninth week.” 

“Anything interesting?” She asked.

“Just some key developmental points, Bean is the size of an olive though.” “He won’t stay that size for long.” She chuckled. “Trust me, it won’t be long until he is the size of an orange, then the size of a coconut and then the size of a watermelon.” She spoke. “I don’t even want to think about how much bigger bean will get.” “You know you can’t keep calling the baby bean right?” She asked as she walked over. “You need to have a name for them.” She continued. “I know. But I feel as though im going to know his or her name when I look at them.” I paused. “So for now, it’s bean.” I smiled as we walked back to camp.

We made it back to the communal tent, using a few drops of the sanitiser that Glenn had brung back from a run before leaving. As we left the tent, a stick had snapped to the right, Lori and I both looked over to see Carol coming to us, a smile on her face. “Morning Carol.” I smiled. “Morning ladies.” She responded, her basket being transferred to her other hand. “Morning.” “How do eggs sound for breakfast?” She asked, a small smile on her face as she held up the basket containing a dozen or so eggs. “Sounds good.” Lori responded as I smiled. “Need any help?” I asked. Carol shook her head. “No honey, I will manage.” She smiled, lighting the fire, setting up the rack and pan, instantly cracking the eggs and scrambling them. The door to the RV opened, Dale stepping out, his favourite mug rested between both hands as he breathed in the morning air, a smile on his features. Andrea was next to exit the RV, stretching and making her way over. Andrea walked right past Lori and I, barley acknowledging us as she made her way to Shanes tent.

I shook my head and sat down on one of the seats. “Okay guys, breakfast is getting served.” Carol called out, serving some egg on the plates. “Thank you.”  Lori smiled, grabbing three plates, sitting them on her chair. “I’ll be back.” Lori stated, walking to her tent. I grabbed two plates and smiled at Carol. “Thank you.” “You’re welcome sweetie.” Daryl was the next person to emerge, looking around grumbling and walking over, sitting on the ground in front of the seat I was in, leaning his back against the front of my chair, positioning himself between my legs. “Here.” I handed him his plate and fork. Daryl nodded in response and took his plate from me, starting to devour his meal. Carl shot out of the tent, followed by Lori, and lastly Rick, who had all taken a seat, Carl yawned as he rested his elbows onto his knees, then propping his head up on his hands, softly tracing in the dirt with his shoes. “Carl, honey don’t do that.” Lori spoke sweetly, handing Carl his breakfast, then Rick his. “Leave him be Lori.” Rick sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. “Morning all.” Shane called out, walking toward us all, sporting his police cap, bending down to grab the last plate Andrea following, her face as hard as stone almost, grabbing a sharpening block and her knife, taking a seat on the small log by the fire, sharpening said knife. I looked over to my right and watched as Glenn took a seat at the base of one of the trees closer to the house, and T-dog was crouched down by the fire, warming his hands.

We all ate in silence, Carol walking around with the pan offering leftovers to whoever wanted any. “Daryl?” She asked. “Thanks.” He nodded and held his plate out. I looked over to Glenn once again and followed his gaze to Dale, who had nodded at him. I looked back to Glenn and watched as he walked toward us all, his hands in his front pockets. “Um, guys.” He started, rubbing his face with one hand, grabbing everyones attention. “So... the barn is full of walkers.” He finished. Simultaneously, everyone had stopped what they were doing. I had stopped running my fingers through Daryl’s hair, and Daryl had looked up from his food. Andrea had stopped sharpening her knife and Carols eggs started to slowly burn. I looked over to Lori who was worriedly looking at her husband, whose expression was unreadable. Rick then stood up, Shane stepped forward. “Lets check this out.” My brother spoke loud, as he headed for the barn in question. We all followed Shane, desperate to see if what Glenn was saying was the truth. Shane was the first to make it to the barn, slowly and cautiously walking to the doors. The group stopped a few metres back and waited as Shane looked through the gap of the wooden planks. After a moment he turned around, storming towards us, scoffing.

“You cannot tell me you're all right with this.” He pushed past Rick.

“No I'm not, but we're guests here. This Isn't our land.” Rick responded. “This is our lives man!” Shane snapped, turning back to face Rick.

“Lower your voice.” Glenn spoke up, trying to not draw attention to us.

“We can't just sweep this under the rug.” Andrea said to Rick.

“It ain't right. Not remotely.” Shane paused, pacing. “Okay, we've either got to go in there, we've got to make things right or we've just got to go. Now we have been talking about Fort Benning for a long time.” He finished.

“We can't go.” Rick answered.

“Why, Rick? Why?” Shane asked.

“Because my daughter is still out there.” Carols answered. I stood forward and put my hand on her arm, squeezing gently as her hand rested on top of my own. “Okay.” Shane paused, scoffing, covering his mouth with his hands. “Okay, I think It's time that we all start to just consider the other possibility.” He nodded towards Carol. I pulled Carol closer to me, and holding her hand.

“We're not leaving Sophia behind.” Rick shook his head. Out of the corner of my eye, I watch as Daryl takes a step forward, annoyance written on his face.

“I’m close to finding this girl. I just found her damn doll two days ago.” He pointed in the direction of the creek.

“You found her doll, Daryl. That's what you did. You found a doll.” Shane spoke down to him.

“You don't know what the hell you're talking about.” Daryl walked forward, chest out.

“I’m just saying what needs to be said. You get a good lead, it's in the first 48 hours.” Shane started to yell.

“Shane, stop.” Rick tried to reason, matching his volume. I moved Carol behind me and took a step forward, softly grabbing Daryls arm,  instantly knowing that with whatever Shane is about to say a brawl will most likely be the end result. “Daryl, don’t.” I whispered to him to have him shake me off. “Let me tell you something else, man. If she was alive out there and saw you coming all methed out with your buck knife and geek ears around your neck, she would run in the other direction!” Shane yelled at Daryl.

Daryl started shouting and trying to get past Rick, as was Shane. “Daryl, he’s not worth it.” I tried, grabbing his arm and pulling him back, Glenn and Rick pushing Shane away.

“Back off!” Rick called out, pushing Shane back. Lori placed her hand on his arm and went to speak.

“Keep your hands off me.” He glared at her, walking away. Rick took a moment, regaining his breath.

“Now just let me talk to Hershel.” He paused. “Let me figure it out.”

“What are you gonna figure out?!” Shane screamed walking towards Rick. “Enough!” Lori was quick to defend her husband, placing her left hand on Shanes chest and pushing him back.

“If we're gonna stay, if we're gonna clear this barn, I have to talk him into it. This is his land.” Rick spoke, his voice firm.

Dale took a step forward, looking at Rick. “Hershel sees those things in there as people.” He begins. “Sick people, his wife, his stepson.” He gestured to the barn.

“You knew?” Rick asked.

“Yesterday I talked to Hershel.” He nodded.

“And you waited the night?” Shane asked, Jaw tight. “I thought we could survive one more night. We did. I was waiting till this morning to say something. But Glenn wanted to be the one.” He defended himself.

“The man is crazy, Rick, if Hershel thinks those things are alive or no-“ Shane started to raise his voice once more, but was cut off.

I slightly jumped back as the chained doors to the barn started swaying, Loud growls and snarls coming from behind it. Daryl was quick to push me behind him, making sure to keep one of his hands connected to me so he knows I was still there. Lori ran to Carl and held him, making sure that we was okay, as Shane and Rick stared at the Doors. “Screw this.” Shane mumbled. “What? What are you going to do now? I think you’ve done enough.” I spoke up “I’m dong a perimeter check on the barn. Some one has to make sure that WE are SAFE.” He emphasised, storming off to inspect the barn.

We all made our way back to the small camp, all of us except Shane. Daryl had made sure that he had eyes on me the entire walk back, stealing glances at the barn as well as making sure I was in front of him. “Daryl, im okay, im back at the camp.” “We need ta’ talk.” He nodded toward the tent. “We can talk here.”

He shook his head and I sighed, walking to our shared tent. Upon entering Daryl had pulled me into a hug.

“Daryl, what’s going on?” I asked as I softly ran my hands along his back. “Don’t go near that barn, ya’ hear me?” He grumbled. “What-“ “Ya’ hear me?” He repeated the question. “Yes Daryl, I hear you, But wh-“ “I’m going ta’ prove that son of a bitch wrong.” He drawled out. “I don’t want you going out there!” I tried to reason with him. “I have ta’ go out there.” “No you don’t, give yourself a lit-“ “The longer I stay ‘ere, the longer that girl is out there.”  “Daryl, you still aren’t healed properly.” “Im healed enough.” He argued.

“You’re a stubborn asshole Dixon.” I paused, shaking my head. “There’s no point in trying to talk you out of this. Just please, come back to me, come back to us.” I pleaded. “Ya’ know I will.” He responded, before roughly kissing me. He took a step back and left. 

I took my jacket off and placed it on the end of the bed, leaving the tent once more and looking around. Dale was on watch, and Lori was sitting at the bench table with Carl, home schooling him.

I spotted Glenn pacing by the now put out fire. “Hey Glenn.” I called out, making my way toward him. He looked up from his feet, a worried expression painted on his face as he looked at me. “Glenn, what’s happening?” I asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Maggie.” “What about Maggie?” I asked. “She most likely hates me now. I told you guys about the Barn, She asked me not to.” He continued to ramble.

I looked over towards the Greene’s home, to see Maggie walking toward the chicken coop. “Glenn.” I tried to stop his rambling. “She asked me to not say anything-“ “Glenn.” “And instead of doing what she asked me to do, I completely ignored her.” “Glenn.” I smiled. He finally stopped rambling and looked at me. “I have three things im going to tell you.” “What?” He asked. “One: Maggie likes you, she wouldn’t have reacted the way she did yesterday if she didn’t.” I smiled. “Two: You told us something that you felt we needed to know. You’re an honest guy Glenn and that is one of your best qualities, if she doesn’t like you, that’s her loss.”                                              “That was only two.” “Im getting there.” I chuckled. “Three: Go to Maggie Glenn, Talk to her.” I smiled. He slowly nodded his head and took a breath. “Okay.” He whispered, hyping himself up. “Im going to go and talk to her.” He nodded, walking toward the house. “Chicken coop!” I called out after him, watching as he turned and ran after Maggie. Glenn was out of sight in no time, eager to talk to Maggie. I looked to my left, watching as Shane did yet another walk around the barn, stopping every few seconds, looking around and occasionally rubbing his face. I don’t know who he is anymore. My brother is changing, not the man I once knew, not the kid I spent the first half of my childhood with. He looks like an addict, wanting his fix of his addiction, instead of drugs or alcohol, its Lori.

I softly shake my head and turn away, making my way to the RV, looking up at Dale. “Do you want me to take over for you?” I called out, blocking the harsh glare of the sun from my eyes. Dale looked down and smiled. “No, it’s alright, Glenn is meant to take shift next, just waiting on the boy.” He responded with a polite nod. “Okay, if I see him again, I’ll send him your way warden.” I joked, saluting him. “At ease.” He joked back, a small chuckle being heard.

I looked over to where Glenn was slowly making his way back to us, flicking his hands toward the ground, his cap carried in his left hand. “Hey, uh, she let me talk to her.” He stated as he came closer. I covered my mouth with my hand to hide my smile, stifling a laugh, trying to regain my composure. “Oh, how did that go?” I asked, still trying hard to not laugh. “She cracked an egg in my cap..” He held his cap out, showing me the broken yolk and fragments of shell. “I see.” I nodded. “Does, does this smell bad to you?” He asked, handing me his cap. “I am not smelling that.” I chuckled. “I will wash it out for you while you go and get cleaned up though.” I smiled. “Thank you.” He breathed out. “You’re welcome, just know that Dale is looking for you.” I smiled as he made his way to get cleaned up, his eyes widened as he looked back at me. “Its my shift.” He ran to get cleaned up. Dale looked over to us and shook his head as Glenn rushed around. I took his cap to our washing area and got to work, rinsing it under the tap, and picking out the eggshells, putting a little drop of detergent and scrubbing it gently, hanging it up once I finished.

I looked over to see Dale throwing Glenn his hat, having a small conversation with the young man, then entering his RV. “Hey, (Y/n).” I looked over to where Lori was, now walking toward me. “Hey, what’s up?” I asked, placing my hands in my pockets, meeting her halfway. “I know.” She paused. “I know, that this is a big ask, but would you mind sitting with Carl for me? Just for a little bit? I’m trying to make life a little bit more normal for him, im going to go look for some books, maybe ask Patricia if she has one she could lend me.” “Yeah, of course I can.” I nodded. “Thank you, so much.” She smiled, patting my shoulder as she headed toward the house. Carl had his nose buried in his book, writing down what his mother had told him before hand. “Hey Bud.” I smiled, taking Lori’s seat. “Oh, hey.” He smiled halfheartedly, looking up from his book. “Whats wrong? You don’t look too happy to see me.” I frowned. “Its not that, I just don’t need a babysitter.” He looked down. “A babysitter? Who? Me?” I asked, pausing. “No, im not a babysitter.” I shook my head, as I pointed at myself. “I think your mom, asked me to come over here so you could watch me.” He looked at me, a small smile appearing on his face. “We all know that I can get into quite a bit of trouble, and she must’ve thought that I needed someone to make sure I was being good.” “Yeah, I won’t let you get into any trouble.” He responded, shaking his head. “Exactly! So how about you show me what it is you’re writing down?” “Mom is just doing basic maths, you know, multiplications.” “Which ones?” “Nines today.” “Oh, well did she tell you about this nifty little trick?” I began. I grabbed his hands and held them out in front of him. “Say we are looking for 9 x 6, put your sixth finger down and you’ll get your answer by counting your fingers on each hand.” “What do you mean?” He asked, looking down at his hands, his sixth finger now down. “So, how many fingers are up in front of your sixth finger?” “Five.” “Okay good, and how many are after it?” “Four.” “Now, the fingers that are up before your sixth finger is what represents the tens in units, and after your sixth finger is the single units.” “So fifty-four four?” He asked, adding it in his head.

“Yeah, My grandma taught me that little trick because I struggled with Math, she called it the FMM” “Do you miss her?” “Everyday little man, im jus glad that her time was before this happened.” I smiled and messed his hair up. “Hey!” He grumbled laughing. Carl had ended up using the method that I had taught him, occasionally sign for help with the higher problems. “Ive finished my multiplications.” He smiled. “Oh, okay good.” I smiled, checking the page where he had written it all down. “Where did mom go anyway?” He asked. “She went to find some more books.” I smiled. Carl groaned and dramatically dropped his head against the table. “This is boring.” He tilted his head to look at me. “Okay, what is something you liked at school?” I asked, scanning his work.

Carl looked up, thinking about his response, when his eyes lit up. “Yeah?” “When I could talk to my friends. You know, like I talked to Sophia.” He nodded. I looked over to him as he mentioned Sophia’s name, having to find my breath again. “Mom says Shane is scared of the walkers in the barn.” He started. “But he thinks that Sophia is dead, he wants to leave.” Carl looked down. I placed his book on the table, lifting his chin up so he could look me in the eyes. “Shane is wrong. We are not leaving okay, we will find Sophia.” I started, Carl looking away. “Hey, Carl look at me sweetie.” I called, moving his chin once again to be face to face with him. “We will find Sophia, okay, I can feel it, we’re close.” I nodded, wiping the tear from the corner of his eye, pulling him into a hug. “Okay, how about we do some division before your mom comes back?” I asked as I rubbed his back. He softly nodded against my shoulder.

Carl had flown through his divisions, proving that he was a really smart kid. “Hey you two, how are your math problems coming along baby?” Lori asked, kissing the top of Carls head. “Ew, mom stop.” He laughed trying to wriggle out of her hands.

“Did you do your nines?” She asked, taking a seat on the other side of Carl. “Yes mom, (Y/n) showed me this cool trick that her grandma showed her, its the FMM” “The what? I’m sorry.” “The Finger Multiplication Method, FMM is a better way to say it.” I answered. “I see.” She smiled, trying not to laugh. The door to the farm house had slammed shut, Rick making his way over to where Shane was leaning against the rusted tractor near the barn. The two men stood discussing, more like arguing over what our course of action would be. “Mom, can I go and help T-dog?” “Yeah honey, just don’t leave the camp.” She nodded, watching as he ran over to the RV. “What do you think they’re talking about?” Lori asked, gesturing to her husband and my brother. “Shane is probably trying to defend his wants.” “They need to agree on what to do, they need to make a decision already, it’s tearing the group apart.” She sighed. “What do you think we need to do?” I asked, now facing her. “I don’t think we should rush into anything. I don’t feel safe with those walkers in that barn.” “Lori, neither do I, but I am siding with Rick here.” I paused. “Shane wants to be right, and he is willing to get all of us kicked out of a safe place, a home.” I continued. Lori looked back towards the two men. “Lori, at the end of the day, you have to do what’s the best for you and your family.” “I know.” She nodded. I stood and went to walk away. “Wait, please.” She grabbed my hand. I looked at Lori confused, and sat back down, holding her hand with both of my own.

“Lori, what?” “I need to be honest with you.” “Whats going on?” “Before, at the quarry, before Rick-“ “I know.” I cut her off. “Shane and I-“ “I know.” I nodded my head, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. “How did you know?” She asked. “You and Shane weren’t really discreet.” I smiled. She shook her head, embarrassment covering her face. “It’s okay, I don’t care.” I shook my head, comforting her. Lori took a deep breath. “This baby, is Ricks baby.” “Even if it is Shanes baby, it will never be his baby.” She finished. “And that baby, will be loved, no matter what.” “This baby, will still have an aunt in me either way, Carl does too. You know that.” Lori nodded her head, reaching a hand up and wiping her tears as she hugged me. “Thank you.” She whispered. Lori stood up, and wiped her hands on her jeans. “I uh, I better go and get some vegetables for dinner.” She nodded, leaving to get vegetables.

I walked over to the RV, searching for Dale and Glenn, both of which were missing. “That’s odd.” I whispered to myself, climbing the ladder of the RV, picking up the rifle, pacing around the roof. Rick and Andrea had met at the cars, discussing their route. “Hey, be careful up there!” Glenn called out, running with a cup of water. “I am being careful.” I rolled my eyes. “Just hang on a second! I’ll be up.” Glenn called out, entering the RV, coming right back out and climbing u the ladder, taking the rifle from me. “What were you doing?” He asked after catching his breath. “I was covering your ass.” I paused, looking for Shane. “What happened?” I asked. 

“Andrea said something to Dale. He said he needed a minute and asked me to get him some water and that he would keep watch.” “Do you know where he is?” He shook his head. “Do you need help back down?” “No, Glenn. I can manage, thank you.” I smiled, descending the ladder. I looked over to where Andrea and Rick were talking, looking at the maps on the hood of Shane’s Hyundai. “Also shows she could be moving this way south. If Sophia kept in that direction, she might have gotten out of the forest and into the farmland.” Rick Paused, gesturing to the roads. “So we take 74 up to Ivy road, then push down south on foot through the forest till we hit Christopher, go east a couple of miles and then double back.” He finished. I watched as Hershel walked closer to Rick, pulling his sleeves up.

“Rick.” He greeted.

“Hershel. We just have our guns out because we're gonna go look for Sophia.”

“Before you do that, I could use your help with something.”

“Count me in.” Andrea nodded.

“Thank you. But I just need Rick.” Rick looked at Andrea, nodding.

“I’ll be down at the barn keeping watch until you're ready.” She nodded, tucking her gun into the back of her jeans, Rolling the map up. “(Y/n), You wanna join me at the barn?” She asked. “Oh, no. Thank you. I need to talk to Dale.” I smiled. “Okay, Im going to head to the barn. Can you put the mag in the RV?” She asked, holding the map out. “Sure.” I nodded, taking it from her. I took the map and placed it on the table, looking through the books Dale had sitting on one of the benches with a note that said ‘throw away’. I looked through the pile and noticed ‘the wind in the willows’. I smiled and grabbed it, making a mental note to tell Dale I borrowed it, not that he’d mind anyway. I looked around, looking for Carl, who was sitting on the log by the cooking pot, a stick in hand, drawing in the dirt. “Carl!” I called out, getting the young brunettes attention. He smiled as he saw me, standing up, tossing the stick aside. “Yeah?” He asked looking up. “I found this, figured it might help get you through the boredom of camp.” “What is it?” He asked taking the book from my hand. “Just a book I loved when I was your age.” I smiled. “Oh cool, thanks.” He beamed, moving back to his seat, opening the book. I took a seat near the pit and checked our medical supplies, seeing what we need and writing it down. It wasn’t very long until Shane was storming past us.

“Hey, Shane, Can I talk to you for a sec?” Carl called out, making Shane stop and turn as I looked up.

“You okay?” He asked moving towards the boy.

“Yeah. I know you think Sophia's dead. And that we should stop looking for her.” Carl paused. “Bu-But that's bullshit.” He finished.

“Hey, man, watch your mouth.” Shane started getting annoyed. I sat the small box beside me and stood up, ready to intervene.

“We're gonna stay here until we find her.” Carl told him.

“You think that's what we should do?”

“It's what I know we should do.” He confirmed.

“Then we stay. That means we got to do whatever we got to do to make that happen. Hmm?” Shane asked, an idea forming. An idea that wouldn’t be good.

“Like help out with chores?” Carl asked innocently.

“Mmm. Like help out with the chores.” Shane nodded. “Carl. Come here for a minute.” Lori called out, clearly uncomfortable.

“Why don't you go see what your mom wants? Hmm? Go on.” “Hey, Carl. Don't let me hear you talk like that again.” He called out after Carl had left. “He is just a kid Shane.” I spoke. “Yeah well he is a kid that needs to learn his place.” “That makes two of you then.” I crossed my arms. He shook his head and headed for the RV. “Shane!” I followed him. “What?” “What are you going to do?”

“Nothing!” He brushed me off. The closer he got to the RV, the faster he walked. “Sup?” Glenn called down, surrendering his hands as Shane looked at him. Shane walked into the RV and started banging around. “What’s up with him?” Glenn asked. I shrugged and waited for him to come out.

“Son of a bitch!” I heard him mumble, practically running out. He looked up at Glenn.

“You see where he went?” Shane asked. “Who?” Glenn asked. “Don't even try to shit me, okay?” He snapped. “Shane!” “What?” “Dale. Glenn. Did you see where Dale went?” He asked. “Yeah, he asked me to run and get him some water.” “He said he'd cover me on watch.” Glenn finished. “And he was gone when you got back, huh?” “Yeah. You think he's okay?” Glenn asked. “Oh, he's fine.” Shane nodded. “Why'd he bail then?” “So you wouldn't tell me which way he went.” “I don't get it.” Glenn looked at me. I shrugged. “No, man, you don’t.” He stormed off once again.

Glenn looked down at me once more, a questioning look on his face. “I honestly, don’t know.” I sighed. “Something doesn’t feel right though.” I continued as I held my hand in front of my eyes, blocking out the sun. “Isn’t that Daryl and Carol?” Glenn asked, looking over toward the tree line, headed into the forest. “Must be.” I nodded as I watched the two of their silhouettes disappear. “You alright (Y/n)?” Glenn called out. “Yeah, im fine.. Im just tired.” I nodded, taking a seat on Dales camping chair. “Are you sure?” He asked. “Im positive Glenn, Fatigue is a symptom that coincides with pregnancy.” “Oh, right.” He chuckled. I closed my eyes, leaning my head back to rest against the RV, taking five minutes to just try to relax. The sound of Glenn calling out to Maggie, quickly deciding to climb down from the RV. “(Y/n), can you cover me for a minute.” “Of course, go.” “Just don’t climb up there!” He called back, trying to catch up with Maggie. “Im pregnant, not missing a limb.” I called back, starting to climb the ladder. I bent down to pick up the rifle. As I stood back up, my head started spinning, I looked down and my hand had grabbed onto the blue camp chair. I lowered myself down and looked around my as the burred motion of my vision, slowly became more clear. I looked down to my hands, knuckles turning white as I gripped the chair, trying to centre myself. Maybe I should have listened to Glenn. As I turned to look, Glenn had taken and placed the smaller basket to the ground, gesturing around the two of them with his hands. Glenn had finished talking, moving to come back when Maggie had called out to him, walking over and bringing him in for a kiss. I smiled, looking away so I didn’t come across as a creep. Andrea was pacing in front of the barn, occasionally stopping, searching around for Shane, im assuming. “Hey, Thank you.” Glenn smiled as he climbed the ladder, joining me atop the RV. “You’re welcome.” I smiled, handing him the rifle as he held his hands out. “So, Maggie and Patricia have invited us all to the house, I asked Lori, she said we should be fine without someone on watch for a bit.” He smiled, placing the rifle down. “Oh, no, I- I can’t just stay up here.” I shook my head. “Why?” “No reason, I can stay.”

Glenn looked at me, a worried expression on his face.

“(Y/N), what’s going on?”

“It’s fine, its nothing too big.” I sighed. “Im just feeling a little light-headed.” I finished. “What?! I told you to not climb up!” He scolded. “I was fine, until I wasn’t.” “Famous last words.” He shook his head. Glenn looked around, thinking to himself. “Ill go and get some help.” He started to descend the ladder. “Glenn! No! Look, I can get down.” I stated, getting up, moving to the ladder. Glenn was already down and looking up at me. I slowly turned and started to climb down. “See, I can do it. Just have to be slow.” I smiled as my left foot hit the ground. “No more climbing up there.” Glenn shook his head. “Glenn, if I need-“ “No, no more.” He stated, guiding me down to the house. “Okay, fine.” I surrendered. I smiled as I noticed Carl was sitting at the table, with Beth and Patricia. Lori came down and grabbed my hand, taking me a little bit further away from the others. “Rick told Shane.” “About-“ I looked down. “Yeah.” “He thinks Rick isn’t built for this world, doesn’t think that Rick will survive.” “Don’t worry yourself over Shane, Lori. He will get over it. Rick will survive, you know it, I know it, the group knows it.”

“Ill be back, Watch out for Carl?” “Of course.” I nodded, I looked over to see T-dog and Andrea walking over to the house. “Do you know what's going on?” T-dog asked hands by his sides.

“Where is everyone?” Andrea asked. I made my way back over to the group and stood on the step behind Maggie.

“You haven't seen Rick?” Glenn asked Andrea.

“He went off with Hershel.” “We were supposed to leave a couple hours ago.” She finished.

“Yeah you were. What the hell?” Daryl interrupted, joining us, Carol behind him.

“Rick told us he was going out.” Carol spoke out from behind Daryl.

“Damn it. Isn't anybody taking this seriously? We got us a damn trail.” Daryl stated annoyed, throwing his right arm towards the tree line.  “Oh, here we go.” He stated as Shane walked toward us. “What's all this?” He pointed at the bag.

“You with me, man?” Shane asked, bringing a pump action shotgun out of the bag.

“Yeah.” Daryl answered, grabbing it and pumping the shotgun, resting it up on his shoulder. “Shane, what do you think you’re doing?” I asked, taking a step down towards him. Shane looked at me, a scowl on his face, looking around at everyone else.

“Time to grow up.” He spoke. “You already got yours?” He looked to Andrea.

“Yeah. Where's Dale?.”

“He's on his way.”

“Thought we couldn't carry?” T-dog asked, taking the gun when Shane handed it to him.

“We can and we have to.” He started. “Look, it was one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was supposed to be safe. But now we know it ain’t.”

“Shane, enough.” “How about you, man? You gonna protect yours?” He held out a gun to Glenn. ”That's it. Can you shoot?” He looked to Maggie.

“Can you stop? You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight.” She tried to reason.

“We have to stay, Shane.” Carl stepped forward. Lori rounded the corner and saw Shane and all of the guns.

“What is this?” She asked.

“We ain't going anywhere, okay?” Shane looked to Carl. “Now look, Hershel, he's just gotta understand. Okay? He--well, he's gonna have to.” He stood forward. “Now we need to find Sophia. Am I right? Huh?” Shane knelt in fronton Carl. “Now I want you to take this. You take it, Carl, and you keep your mother safe. You do whatever it takes. You know how. Go on, take the the gun and do it.” Shane nodded, holding the gun out for Carl.

I reached forward and grabbed the gun before Carl could and glared at Shane as Lori swooped in and pushed Carl behind her.

“Rick said no guns. This is not your call. This is not your decision to make.” She spoke firm.

“Oh shit.” T-dog got our attention. I moved forward to take a closer look into what we were witnessing. Along the fence line we watched as Jimmy, Rick and Hershel were leading walkers to the barn. “What is that? What is that?” Shane growled as he pushed past everyone running for the three men by the barn.

“Shane!” Lori and I both yelled, protesting.

The closer he got to Rick and Hershel the more the shouting had escalated. “What the hell are you doing?” My brother shouted.

“Shane, just back off!” Rick tried to talk Shane down.

“Why do your people have guns?” Hershel had asked.

“Are you kidding me? You see? You see what they're holding onto?” Shane had started pointing at the walkers.

“I see who I'm holding onto.” Hershel corrected him.

“No, man, you don’t.” Shane shook his head. I watched as Daryl held the gun up, ready to shoot, Shane

“Shane, just let us do this and then we can talk.” Rick had once again tried to talk Shane out of his rage.

“What you want to talk about, Rick?” “These things ain't sick. They're not people. They're dead. Ain't gonna feel nothing for them 'cause all they do, they kill! These things right here, they're the things that killed Amy. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all of us.” Shane yelled

“Shane, shut up!” Rick yelled.

“Hey, Hershel man, let me ask you something.” Shane started. “Could a living breathing person, could they walk away from this?” He asked as he shot the female walker three times in the chest. “Shane stop!” I yelled moving forward.

Daryl stood infant of me and pushed me back with his body. “Stay outta this.” He growled. “Keep her here.” He looked at Carol, who had rested her hands on my shoulders, turning back and holding the gun to the walkers head. “No! Stop it!” Rick shouted once more.

“That's three rounds in the chest. Could someone who's alive, could they just take that?! Why is it still coming?” Shane asked Hershel, shooting it another two times. “That's its heart, its lungs. Why is it still coming?” He shouted, shooting it two more times. “Shane, enough!”

“Yeah, you're right, man. That is enough.” Shane agreed, walking up to it, shooting it in the head. Hershel dropped to his knees as the walker had fallen, just watching as it lied dead on the floor. “Enough risking our lives for a little girl who's gone!” He shouted. Carol gasped as Shane mentioned her daughter, hand moving from my shoulders to her mouth. “Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us. Enough. Rick, it ain't like it was before! Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you got to fight for it! I'm talking about fighting right here, right now.” Shane yelled as he ran to the barn. “Take the snare pole. Hershel, take the snare pole. Hershel, listen to me, man, please. Take it now. Hershel! Take it!” Rick shouted, trying to get Hershel to take the snare. Shane grabbed a short handled hoe, bashing against the lock on the barns door. “No, Shane. Do not do this, brother. Wait!” Rick tried to reason.

“Don't do it!” Glenn yelled. “Shane! Enough is enough! Stop it!” I screamed.

Shane had pried the lock off of the door, moving the plank securing it, leaving only the old chains. I looked around, Lori was moving Carl behind her, Maggie was on the ground with her father, her sister with jimmy. It was chaotic, everyone was shouting. The doors started opening, one by one walkers had started to pile out. Andrea and T-dog rushed forward to help Shane on the frontline, next was Daryl running to aide them. My heart ached for the Greene family, Maggie was crying and I watched as Glenn went to comfort her, she nodded and he moved forward joining in on the walker massacre, with regret on his face. Shane looked back, and shot the walker that Rick was still holding, Rick had turned around to check on Carl and his wife before looking back to the shit show in front of us. Gunshots continued to echo over the property as Daryl shot the last walker. Our group had lowered their weapons, looking over the damage they’d just done. The snarls of another walker could be heard and we all waited for it to emerge. My tears instantly fell as the little girl walked out of the barn, Carols cries, magnifying the shock. Carol had ran forward before I could do anything. “Sophia? Sophia! Sophia. Sophia. On no. Sophia. Sophia.” She tried running past Daryl, who had grabbed her and pulled her back, both of them dropping to their knees as she sobbed. “Sophia.” I moved my hand to cover my mouth, as I cried into it, watching as Rick walked forward, raising his gun. I closed my eyes as the last gun shot sounded. The sound of Carols sobs, being branded into my brain.

Series Masterlist Next Part

[liujinhee]

[ Kyuhyun/Reader ]

plotting an us (working title)

Word Count: 2,622

Summary: Art student y/n, theatre student Kyuhyun one shot

Uh, so this was supposed to be a y/n fic, but I think I gave the character so much personality that they qualify better as an OC? Haha... im sorry guys :')

-

There was little use in trying to reason with yourself why you travel two hours every weekend to the Penguin Ice cafe. Cafe menus were unreasonably expensive, and Penguin Ice was located in the heart of the city, where the population was far too saturated for your liking.

Then you hear the familiar voice saying the words Welcome to Penguin Ice cafe, and you know you'll be coming back next weekend regardless.

You walk straight up to the counter—even if you had a crush on one of the part timers, it didn't mean your judgement was clouded enough that you'd drop by during rush hour just to see him. At 4pm, the cafe was quiet, a few patrons scattered in different corners.

When Kyuhyun's gaze falls on you, his professional smile softens into one you now recognize as warm. “Single scoop of matcha and vanilla with sprinkled topping, having here?”

“Got it in one.” You return the smile, hoping it isn't too wide. The way your feelings tend to write themselves on your facial features has never done more good than harm thus far. Digging into your pocket, you hand him the bill; never the exact amount, if only for the selfish reason of wanting him to drop the change onto your open palm.

And he does. “Here's your change,” Kyuhyun sings in that merry tune you know by heart.

“Someone's in a good mood.”

He makes a show of scanning the bar, which currently only has him manning it, before leaning forward. He's not close enough that you feel his breath, but still close enough that your heart rate picks up as he tells you in a hushed whisper that fails to contain his glee, “It's payday.”

You snort at that, even though you already had your suspicions. Kyuhyun simply gives you a cheeky grin and wags his brows, seemingly pleased to have shared that little tidbit. Your hand twitches with the instinct to reach out and ruffle his hair, something you're not quite able to do to someone you can barely call an acquaintance. So you settle for a Congratulations, to which he bows dramatically, My heartfelt thanks, before twirling away to prepare your order.

He may be majoring in theatre, you think. Or at the very least, hold an interest in it. It's not the first time the two of you have exchanged words in such a manner, nor do you believe it'd be the last. As you watch him drop a generous scoop of ice cream into a cup, you wonder if you should ask him today. Something like, What school are you from? What's your favorite ice cream flavor? Do you want to catch the next musical that comes?

But they all feel like questions that'd make your existing dynamic awkward. In a way, you already consider Kyuhyun a friend, despite not knowing anything about him other than his name, which you got from his name tag, and that he only works on weekends, which is written on their blackboard under the Shifts section. 

Once again, you spend too much time overthinking, and your order is ready before you come to a decision, Kyuhyun extending the cup to you with a gentle hum. Your mumble of thanks matches the tone of his hum, and your feet bring you to your usual seat, empty as it always is. Customers aren't the biggest fans of seats by the entrance, after all; the constant opening and closing of the door can get annoying. It doesn't bother you, however. As much as you dislike crowds, you find comfort in the buzzing of human activity.

And, well, if the seat provides you a good view of the bar where Kyuhyun busies himself with cleaning up, that's just a really big bonus. Once you're satisfied with the angle of your chair, you bring out your pencil and sketchbook, flip to a fresh page, and begin sketching.

It's not always Kyuhyun. Scenery fascinates you, and you've long since lost count of the cityscape, the parks, the rivers that you've drawn from memory and imagination. But it's always when the imagination starts that Kyuhyun joins, somehow making his way into the scenery.

This time, you’ve sketched him barefoot by the beach, laughing as he splashes seawater up a silhouette with his foot. It’s an imagery that comes easily to you; Kyuhyun with his friends out having fun together. He seems like the type of person who is able to get along with everyone, and you're near certain he is.

You scribble down the date and your signature like you do on every piece of art, leaving out your name. The ripping of the page is quiet, barely audible over the music; the edges of the paper imperfect, but they always are. 

As you rest the paper under the now empty cup, you can't help but imagine how Kyuhyun would react to the sketch this week. He hasn't shared his thoughts on your sketches since that first time nearly three months ago, when you'd come to Penguin Ice with your friends for a birthday celebration.

I like the way you sketch, Kyuhyun had told you as he served the tray of sundaes ordered by your table. Art student?

Yeah, you'd answered after a moment of shock, watching how the man's eye was trained on the lines of your sketch. Understanding that it was genuine praise. Your eyes had fallen to his askewed name tag, committing his name to memory. And, um, thanks. He'd tipped his head in acknowledgement, set down your orders, and returned to his post.

Looking back, it might've seemed like nothing. But to the you back then who had been dealing with self doubt, the words of a stranger had been everything you needed to hear and more. While your friends chit chatted and ate, you'd done up a quick sketch of the cafe, and left it on the table with a short thank you note addressed to Cho Kyuhyun.

The next time you'd come, it had been because another friend was curious after seeing your post about the cafe before. Even then it had been Kyuhyun who took one look at you and went, Ah, the art student! Right? The memory of that moment still makes you chuckle now. It's in his recognition that Kyuhyun started becoming more than a part timer at a cafe in the city for you.

Now, as you wait for Kyuhyun to turn away and busy himself with cleaning before sneaking out of the cafe like a protagonist in a cliche romance drama, you wonder if this plot will ever advance, or if this is but a draft that will not live to see a happy ending.

It doesn't really serve as a surprise when you come across Kyuhyun at a local arts festival you are a participant of. You've thought about it, the what if. What does surprise you, is how you come across him.

There's an event pamphlet, of course, but you're also not the type of person who focuses on details like the musical cast names. It's not like any of them would ring a bell, since they're students. Except one of them does. You don't connect the dots at first, too tired from hours of live sketch after live sketch for customers. Then you hear it, his My heartfelt thanks, and the thought is formed.

Can it be? You reach into your back pocket for the pamphlet and flip to the musical lineup for today. Sure enough, printed in bold is the name Cho Kyuhyun along with a photo of him. Gods, does he look cute in casual wear. You're staring hard at his photo when he rips your attention back to him with his vocals.

While you wouldn't go as far as to call yourself a theatre enthusiast, it's not like you haven't been to musicals. You have, and you enjoy them when you do. Paid hundreds of bucks for a good three straight hour sitting of a show that'd live in your memories for decades to come. And when Kyuhyun sings, goosebumps rising along your arm midway through the first line, you know that's the kind of level he'd belong on in the near future. That's how good he is.

You're in awe, then you're in wonder, and then maybe, just maybe, you're falling in love with the theatre student and part time ice cream man Cho Kyuhyun. The sudden realisation startles you, but you accept it just as quickly. Little as you may know, it's enough for you to have developed feelings for him, and you feel it growing stronger every passing second in your mind. Your fingers itch with the need to capture this moment forever in the form of a painting.

Then the musical comes to an end, the cast coming together, hands joined as they bow their thanks while the audience reciprocates with thundering applause. Your eyes are still on Kyuhyun as the curtain falls, but you're certain he hasn't seen you in the dark. Nor would he know or have reason to be looking out for you.

You're out the moment you're able, zigzagging through the night crowd back to your post in a rush. It's not that you're late to return, nor will your neighbor mind even if you were. You simply need to pick up a pencil right now and bring to life the visuals buzzing in your head. It's been a while since you've felt this adrenaline rush under your skin. 

This is going to be a masterpiece.

-

You drown yourself in the canvas, skipping your weekly visit to the Penguin Ice cafe for the first time. There's only one reason for it: you don't want to override the memory of seeing Kyuhyun on the stage. A side you've never seen before, a temporary skin he wears so well one may be fooled into thinking it is his own.

There's a moment when you wonder if you'll ever finish the painting—each time you think you're quite about done, the paint setting for the last time, there's something new to add or to revise. You want to make it perfect, but in art, nothing ever is. Still, it is through willpower that you drop the brush for good, stepping back to take a good look at your painting.

It's… well, there’s no other way to say it: it's the man you saw on stage that night. It’s as close to what you wanted to express as you think it can get. The desire, the urge to convey your admiration for Kyuhyun grows overwhelming, and you rush to hold down on the power button of your phone. It’s 7:12pm on a Sunday. Which means there’s a good chance Kyuhyun will be there. They close at 10pm on weekends… can you make it?

It's worth the risk, you decide. You've got to be stupid at least once in your life (or many, but that's not how the saying goes, see). You wrap up the canvas carefully, yelling to your parents that they don't need to buy your share for dinner later, and rush out the second you feel presentable enough for public appearances.

Kyuhyun stares at you unblinking, and you do the same. It's easy to get lost in the reflection you see in them—and he blinks, light returning to his eyes.

“Hey,” he greets, but behind it you sense the question.

“Hey,” you return between pants.

“We're closing,” he says slowly, as if you can't tell from the flipped chairs and cluttering of washed utensils, “But if you're okay with on the go, I can bring out the tubs.”

You shake your head wildly before Kyuhyun can go grab said tubs. “That's not why I'm here.”

When you don't elaborate, he nods once and prompts, “Okay… So you're here to…”

“Pass you something. I can wait till you're off work. If you don't mind, I mean.” You're babbling, and you just know your face is a deep shade of red from nerves and embarrassment. To his credit, Kyuhyun doesn't judge despite his wrinkled brows, and gestures in the direction of your usual seat. So that's where you head. And you wait, your mind too crowded and thoughts so jumbled that you blank out until someone taps you on the shoulder.

“I'm done here,” he says, but now your brain short-circuits for a different reason. Kyuhyun in a plain t-shirt and shorts with a bag slinging across one shoulder shouldn't be anything worth ogling over, but it is. Even more so than the photo you'd seen on the pamphlet. You struggle to remember how to string words together and give him an answer, digging into your backpack for the thing you're here to hand him but can't quite remember what.

Then your fingers brush against the cloth holding your canvas, and you're reminded of your purpose. Right. With your heart slamming against your chest, you carefully pull out the painting you spent a week on, all while watching for any changes in Kyuhyun's expression. He has that cute frown that suggests he's confused, and you bite back a smile as you extend the canvas in an offering.

“For me?” 

The laugh breaks free from you as he accepts it with a cautiousness you've never seen. “

“Is there… something here?” He wonders aloud, gesturing between the two of you. His question is innocent enough, but then you see the way he's nibbling on his lower lip, the way he's peeking at you from under his long lashes—why are they so long anyway, you briefly wonder.

“An empty space,” you quirk, still somewhat afraid to take the leap, but unwilling to leave his question hanging in the air. 

Kyuhyun is instantly right by your side, the sleeves of your t-shirts brushing against each other, his body heat radiating off him this close. You feel yourself stiffen before you relax, easily growing used to this new lack of distance.

“So that's fixed,” Kyuhyun says after four beats of silence. “Anything else?”

“Hmm,” you hum to stall time as you think of other quirky answers to give, but it seems that isn't something Kyuhyun is willing to take a second time. His steps grow wider as he makes to stand in your way, forcing you to look up at him. He isn't exactly tall per say, perhaps a 1.8, but you're simply leaning toward the other end of the spectrum. 

“Hey.”

“Hey.”

He smiles, small and shy and hopeful. “It'd be really embarrassing if I'm reading this wrong, but are you interested in me the same way I'm interested in you?”

And now it's you who's worrying your lower lip, question after question clogging up your mind about all the things you can say that will ruin any possibility of the two of you—Then you look at Kyuhyun again, and realise the man’s likely feeling the same, to some extent.

Licking your dry lips, you decide to go for it. “If by that you mean—” you swallow before you're sent into a coughing fit because of your salivary glands, “—The I want to hold your hand on a date kind of interested… then yes.”

“Who said anything about dating?” he teases, and before your brain even registers the words for you to feel disappointed, he continues, “I think we should start with self introductions first, shouldn't we? After all, I still don't know your name.”

“Okay then.” Kyuhyun clears his throat, his posture tall and grand before he gives a graceful bow, hand extended. “Would you do me the honor of exploring the potentials in this budding relationship?”

It seems like the plot is moving forward, after all.

[rynhaswritersblock]

quaranteens (hc) | p.p.

summary: how you and petey boi spend your quarantine <3

i'm not even writing a warning for this one at this point y'all now how i write HAHA

+ + +

- covid-19

- coronavirus

- lil shitbag asshole virus

- Y'ALL KNOW THE DEAL

- it's QUARANTIME WITH Y/N AND PETER

- let's get it !

being quarantined with peter parker at avengers headquarters

- lots of animal crossing

- like lots

- you and peter visit each other's islands and it's SO FUNNY

- you keep BONKING each other on the head with your nets

- you shake a tree and a wasps nest falls out

- naturally you yell "SHIT" and steve yells "LANGUAGE"

- so you start fucking SPRINTING (in the game lmao) TO RUN AWAY FROM THE WASPS

- AND POOR PETER GETS STUCK IN THE MIDDLE OF IT

- AND THE WASPS START FOLLOWING HIM

- AND HE GETS BIT

- you start fucking WHEEZING

- you cannot breathe

- peter just sets the switch down and throws his head back, letting out an annoyed groan/yell

- "bitch ass motherfucker" he whispers as he picks the switch back up

- let's not forget to mention the fact that

- the entire time you and peter are playing

- the two of you are like intertwined

- most of the time your head is in his lap or vice versa

- like y'all get into the WEIRDEST POSITIONS on the couch

- sometimes steve or tony or nat or any of them really will walk by and be like "wtf... kinda cute doe"

- but it's so comfy!!!!!!

- and when y'all play at night it's of course in your rooms

- usually it'll start with the two of you separated

- and then one of you is usually like "why the fuck are we apart right now" and goes into the other's room

- then y'all will get all close to each other and play and there'll just be occasional giggling and tiny conversations and cussing here and there

- peter just starts to HARASS one of ur villagers

- you get a little upset but it's AL so you're like... lol not my problem

- one day peter shows you this tiktok where some couple was playing together and it was like "how me and my bf are spending quarantine apart"

- AND THEIR CHARACTERS ARE LIKE... FUCKING

- BUT ANIMAL CROSSING STYLE

- ANIMAL CROSSING: NEW HORIZONS. RATED E FOR EVERYONE!!!!!!!!

- but you and peter find it SO FUNNY

- SO NATURALLY

- you know what's coming

- YOU AND PETER COPY THEM

- irl the two of you are DYING in his bed

- like rolling all over the place because you're laughing so hard

- peter uses a popper as... you know... and you YELL CAUSE YOU LAUGHED SO HARD

- also it's 4 in the fucking morning

- MEANWHILE

- on the OTHER SIDE OF THE HALL

- sam is FED UP

- !!

- he's like what in the everloving HELL are they DOING!!!

- so

- the man enters the premises like

ಠಿ_ಠ

"what the hell are you two-"

"look!"

- you can barely get that word out because of your laughter

- but you hold up the switch

- sam watches and realizes RIGHT AS PETER USES ANOTHER POPPER

- HE SEES THAT YOU'RE LIKE LAYING DOWN ON THE BED AND HE'S STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU AT YOUR FEET

- the LOOK on his face

- he fucking smiles and buries his face in his hands, shaking his head

- when he finally composes himself his eyes are fucking

watering

"i might just have to get that game.."

- okay that's it for the animal crossing section of this imagine lol i'm obsessed with this game AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE IT

- I HAVE WATCHED FAR TOO MANY VIDEOS

- OKAY MOVING ON!!!!!!!!!!

- the AMOUNT of TV the two of you watch

- the two of you alternate shows you pick (so like peter chooses then you then peter etc etc)

- peter chooses b99 (bae)

- y'all finish that shit in a WEEK

- then you recommend euphoria

- he's like uh okay

- cause he knows how inappropriate that show is lol

- so every time there's a dick on the screen he covers your eyes

- and every time there's b00bies on the screen you cover his

- and some point he's like

"y/n you do realize that i've seen boobs before"

- you're like

- i mean yeah but i refuse to think about that because you're supposed to be innocent and pure and a puppy dsfjkdfnkj

- so you retort

"and you do realize that i've seen a dick before?"

- peter is the more jealous baby

- he pauses the show and shifts his body towards you

"wait, where?"

- you cringe

"some kid i'd just met sent me a dick pic.."

- peter's like okay convo over

- the two of you keep watching but now it's more uncomfortable

- at the end of the episode you were watching (imma say episode two lol)

- you bust out laughing

"you know the kid's dick was like... small, right? like i didn't enjoy receiving that picture? it was unsolicited, peter"

- he laughs lightly

"yeah, okay"

- you poke his cheek

"someone's jealous"

- he gasps

"i am NOT jealous!"

"you just don't like the fact that i've seen a dick"

"i guess, yeah"

"peter, i'm going to eventually"

- the poor kid is like we need to stop talking about penises right the fuck now

- SO YOU TWO KEEP WATCHING

- im so sorry for writing that part in haha it just came to mind and it's CONTENT you know and i really feel like it's a realistic convo to have in that situation

- the last episode makes you cry and you don't even realize you're crying until peter holds you closer and wipes the tear off your cheek

- bae

- let's just say the two of you finished euphoria in a day

- okay also

- DANCE PARTIES!!

- the amount of dance parties the two of you had... insurmountable

- like y'all would be training together and a bop would come on and you'd stop punching just to jump around and make complete fools of yourselves

- the two of you had to have a dance party after finishing euphoria because that shit put you in a FUNK

- but yeah

- dance!!!!!!!!!!!

- okay BAKING!!!!!

- y'all made so much food

- cookies

- cake

- pretzels

- brownies

- like

- never going hungry

- half the time the kitchen is a whole MESS but it's okay cause when you do clean it up you and peter throw bubbles at each other and it's great

- steve swears everyone is going to get so out of shape

- so he comes up with a system

- everyone gets snack time together and then thirty minutes later everyone goes and trains to make up for the extra calories

- and lemme just say

- the training sessions go HARD

- everyone is fucking sugar high it's the most chaotic thing ever

- music blaring

- sam and bucky are wrestling

- tony and steve are arguing in the corner (award for most calories burnt)

- nat and wanda are fighting bruce and pietro and nearly kill each other

- meanwhile you and petey boi are seeing who can do the most complicated gymnastics set

- as soon as the boy does a layout you're like okay BYE

- so yeah

- baking!!!!!!

- time for even more fluff

- cuddling

- oh

- my

- god

- you and peter LITERALLY NEVER LEAVE EACH OTHER

- the two of your are in physical contact 99% OF THE TIME

- and that's mainly peter's fault because he lowkey clingy but YOU LOVE IT

- the two of you build a fort in the commons and have movie marathons along with your tv marathons

- occasionally one or more of the team will come chill with y'all

- there's an overall "no judgment zone" that has been declared at headquarters

- aka mind ya own fucking business

- unless someone is literally in a deep state of depression then something needs to be done

- but like

- literally everyone notices how often the two of you are just intertwined with each other

- it's 🅱razy

- also y'all order tons of pizza

- like tons

- thankfully u and peter are like ayo fast metabolism check! (smh i wish lol once i quit soccer it really hit me OOPS)

- OH AND SCHOOL

- y'all are switched to online school

- you and peter-man get really competitive with it to see who can finish all their work the fastest

- thing is the two of you literally have pretty much identical schedules so you end up going at the same pace to work together

- maybe you help each other on quizzes and tests

- no one will ever know

- and overall you two are lowkey thriving in that department because you end up finishing your work for the week in like two or three days and have the rest of the time to just VIBE

- a/n y'all i seriously recommend actually doing that like i get a SUPER big workload at the beginning of the week and as soon as i can i just ZOOOOOM and try to get it all knocked out and it's honestly really helpful

- obviously this can be really difficult for people who aren't self motivated and maybe depressed but i would just try!! if you can!! okay note over BACK TO THE SHITS N GIGGLES

- so yeah

- i don't really have anything else to say but

- overall being quarantined with peter and the team is really nice and the vibes are THERE

- fuck i got another idea

- okay

- it's the middle of the night and you and peter are watching some movie that netflix autoplayed

- the two of you get a notification and look at your phones at the same time

UPDATE: Midtown School of Science and Technology has now been shut down for the rest of the 2019-2020 school year. Online school will continue.

- the two of you visibly shrink

- deadass

- like you just slump over and toss your phone

- you curl up into the boy and a tear rolls down your cheek cause it finally hits you

- this shit is real..

- you sniffle and peter immediately turns to you and wipes your cheek

"hey, it's okay. i'm here."

"i don't know, i just... miss everyone, i guess."

- he nods

- and then he kisses you

- oh so softly

- i'm here

- ...

- okay MOMENT OVER I CAN'T TAKE HOW SERIOUS THAT WAS

- BASICALLY AFTER THAT YOU TWO DON'T REALLY DECLARE ANYTHING BUT YOU DO SPEND A LOT OF QUARANTINE MAKING OUT.... OOPS

+ + +

thank u for reading loves

MWAH

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG //CHAPTER 20

i mispelt the title as ‘oofal hunt’ which, i mean, mood,

IN THIS EPISODE OF DEPRESSION TO THE MAX:

"Fuck you."

THAT’S IT. THAT’S-- THERE’S THE CHAPTER.

/looks at the chosen lyrics for this chap :hrm:

do i still have to a little introduction to this liveblog? twenty chapters in? methinks not so lets just get right Tew It shall we

“We’re here, Ms. Fall.”

/marks this next section down on the tally of cinder’s mistakes. we’re somewhere in the high thousands.

An old Dust extraction point, quietly rotting. Cinder’s mouth pulled. There was an abysmal dearth of kindling.

cinder: you know you could at least take me somewhere better suited for me to kick your ass. this is VERY rude. am NOT a fan. my yelp review will NOT be kind.

i love cinder counting up the numbers. you know honestly id be deeply charmed if someone saw it fit to bring half an army out to take me on. i mean, would it be a pain in my ass? yes. but also. awh. thanks lads! love how many of you blocked out this evening just for me x

"Sienna Khan!" Cinder could barely hear herself between the claws of that strange laughter. "Sienna Khan! It’s really—really—you!"

uh-oh sisters,

oh man sienna and cinder is just. look. WOOF. theres a lot here. a lot going on. a lot that HAD gone on. but also im gay so this tension is peak for me PLEASE lay it on thick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LETS GO!

Cinder stopped laughing.

"Overkill," she repeated, and in the same breath, crossed the tarmac in full immolation.

HELL YEAH BABEY. but also was the more the implication that cinder is an easy kill OR the implication that glynda’s the bigger threat that’s more annoying,,,,,,,,,,,,, well!!!!!!!! too late to find out now!!!!!!!!!!!!!

They clashed: once, twice, three times, steel on Aura, flitting through space, but—he wasn't faster than Glynda.

wait it’s the former i forgot cinder’s gay nvm

“Cinder. I mean it. I want to talk.” Sienna’s face revealed nothing. Her gaze stayed fixed on Cinder, as if she were searching for something.

What it could be, Cinder had her guesses, and all of them repulsed her utterly. She spat, “Well, I was only planning on sending your Lieutenant’s head to you in a box signed Love Cinder, so I didn’t really come with a speech prepared.”

SDHJGHJGSKFD SORRY IM LIKE. tryna liveblog but im also just :EYES: at everything here.......... im SO PUMPED for this cause im just SO CURIOUS,,,,,, WE’VE HAD SO MANY SNIPPETS,,,,,,,,, BUT IM HONGRY FOR MORE,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

that said i feel like cinder’s the type of person who revisits arguments in her head hours later with new, better points, so i think she does have a speech prepared. in fact i think she has many words stored up in the ol’ meatspace, and all of them are very rude,

The Sienna Khan that Cinder remembered still had baby-fat in her cheeks and hadn’t learned to keep her thoughts off her face. The one she saw now had weaponized distance.

/stage whisper hang on that visual is cute dont put it in HERE where the TENSION IS

Quietly, Sienna went for her belt, pulling away something the same polished silver as her whip. It might have been an arrow tip, except that it was lethally barbed and looked like it had been modified to chamber Dust. Pale blue glinted within it.

Cinder darkened. "Ice Dust?"

sienna: i wanna talk sienna: with violence!

GOD ITS REAL INTERESTING CAUSE,,,,,,,,,, THERE’S A LOT HAPPENING HERE. glynda didnt Know cinder in any sense so we’ve very much been on the ‘let’s figure cinder out with glynda’ train like the whole. the rain! and the desert! etc! all very much thru the lens of glynda ‘i dont remember shit’ goodwitch! so now we have seinna who Knows Shit cause there’s so much history here and im like blease wait talk more first i want the KNOWLEDGE

[...] "Roman Torchwick is holed up in Vytal with your warehouses, and those two teens haven’t been sighted in months... But you wouldn't send them that far north, would you?”

“I wouldn’t send them anywhere you could get your claws in them.”

“The White Fang isn’t like that anymore. We don’t strong-arm children into our ranks. That girl—the snake Faunus—”

“If you say one more word about her,” Cinder said. “I’m going to do something drastic to every single person here.”

ACTUALLY TALK LESS TALK LESS LETS FIGHT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!! AND NOT TALK!!!!!!!! A T A L L

Sienna's shoulders leveled. "This is not Hróðvitnir's White Fang anymore."

me: huh why do i recognise that name,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, me: oh yeah!!!!!!! that bitch,

HJGDSJKHGFDS we Love a homage to a classic au and to a cinder so good that id die for her. i mean id die for this cinder too but like that was another level of Die For. anyway. back to the au at hand,

“If I didn’t know better, I might believe you," Cinder snapped, and her old scars throbbed in tandem. “But I do know better. I found one of your parasites, sucking the life out of a town near the wastes. Bringing the White Fang’s protection. You should have seen how he protected them. There wasn't a child there without a fang or an antler missing."

hang on a sec, lets LEAP BACK in time for just a moment

okay so i nipped back to chapter five for just a hot second to see if there was a line that was particular pertinent, but also i found smthng else...

Violence collected at her twitching fingers, old scars across her body flaring with phantom pain. (Chapter 5)

“If I didn’t know better, I might believe you," Cinder snapped, and her old scars throbbed in tandem. (Chapter 20)

HM,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, man. cinder. you got real fucked up huh. ANYWAY THAT WASNT WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR I JUST LINED THE CONTINUITY (because im jealous). what i was ACTUALLY looking for was THIS:

There would be another overseer, the inhabitants would resume their harried lives, and Cinder wouldn’t spare this town a second thought.

i said at the time in an emotional fit of pain that this was a straight-up lie but cinder is nothing if not a melting pot of emotional reckoning, and I WAS RIGHT. LET IT BE INSCRIBED UNTO THE STONES!!!! SHE DID SPARE IT A SECOND THOUGHT!!!!!!!! HELD IN HER MIND LONG ENOUGH TO RECALL THE DETAILS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JUST 2 SPIT IT IN SIENNA’S FACE!!!!!!!!! im telling you that cinder has SO MUCH MORE GOING ON!!!!!!!!!!! and heres my PROOF. PROOF OF WHY SHES AN ANGEL (ONLY ON TUESDAYS THOUGH [10AM-1PM])!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Then: "Why don't you say," Sienna responded slowly, her expression slotting into place like a bullet chambering, "precisely what you mean, Cinder."

"Fuck you."

:’3c

cinder has such a way with words. i love her eloquence. remember that time glynda thought she was taking the piss out of the fact she was autistic at dinner? cinder yr a maestro. never change.

“You brought Beowolves to heel. You could turn a Goliath with a word!"

“I had—no—Aura! Nothing to protect me!”

:eyes: :thinking:

HM,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, INTERESTING??????? i feel like this is the first time we’ve heard of cinder w/o aura implicitly? unless im Stupit and dont remember a Got Dang Thing but HUH. does this. hm. huh. am i stupid. someone tell me if i missed a thing.

“This isn’t a diplomatic mission, Cinder. I simply wanted to know what their lives were worth to you—before we wipe our hands of each other for good.”

“That’s a funny way of saying only one of us is walking away from this.”

GOD,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i LOVE this scene a lot the interplay between sienna and cinder is absolutely PEAK,,,,,,,, PEAQUE,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, im rly enjoying this. also im dying. but im enjoy it a LOT.

“The White Fang you and I grew up in doesn't exist anymore. We’re changing. But you… When did you stop caring? Was it when you cut your horns to be one of them instead?"

Dragonfire scorched Cinder's lungs, blackening every word: "I was never—your—people."

feels like its been a good goddamn whilst since i got to do one of these 👈😎👈, so let’s savour the moment

👈👈👈👈👈👈😎👈👈👈👈👈👈

aaaaaand savoured. lets continue.

Shaking with the effort of holding her strike, Sienna grit, "I won't relish this."

And Cinder howled, "I will!”

ah shit i shouldve said lets RELISH this to tie the whole theme together and-- and fuck it, combat scene. never good at liveblogging these. sdfjhgsdfghj

Gunfire sparked against her, but she honed in on him with single-minded intent, the kind she’d whetted to a razor’s edge against Glynda.

for a chapter following cinder escaping glynda, she’s thought about her TWICE now. huh. huh. interesting. gay. and interesting,,,,,,

It was nothing like fighting Glynda. This was bleak and repetitive: the second drove forward and Sienna covered his openings, stopping Cinder before she could rip his heart from his chest, and all the while, the gunfire whittled away at her Aura. It was a joyless tactic, no flair or heart, and yet—

HUH. GAY AND INTERESTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FLAIR OR HEART,,,,,,,,,, i cant believe every time they fought cinder was actually just doing a shit job of flirting. the more you know.

The world erupted into flames. They grew massive, swirling around her like a hurricane—Cinder’s Aura exploded outward in desperation, like a dying star defiantly spending the last of itself on a supernova; one final flare, brighter than entire galaxies, if only for a single moment. Cinder felt flashes of bright pain through her muscles as if the fire was burning her from inside.

MAN,,,,,,,,,,,,, I COULD TALK ABT SOME UH,,,,,,,,,,,,, well. i could talk abt a few things here. but theyre kinda 👈😎👈 so i WONT,,,,,,,,,,,,,, but kno that i am having some Thoughts on the matter. hm.

“Prove it!” Death was thrumming in her veins. It had never made her brave before. It did now, the memory of Glynda’s blind, resolute stare heady in her skull. “Come and prove it! Do it, or I’ll hunt you to your last, miserable breath, Sienna!”

so remember when glynda had her little outburst at winter and i said that i love how cinder rubbed off on glynda in the worst way? i cant believe glynda ALSO rubbed off on cinder ALSO in the WORST WAY!!!! this is how u know this truly is a soulmates thing.

“It’s a shame you outgrew your swords, Cinder Fall. I would have taken them as a trophy,”

it’s with great disappointment that i must say: i agree with adam. the swords were hot. they should come back.

Sienna’s footsteps were whispers at Cinder’s back. The trap was closing. Cinder pooled flame in one palm. The other hand was useless, limp at her side. Impotent rage tasted like blood in her mouth. “I don’t even remember your fucking name.”

HJGKDSFKJHGFSDJDHGF GOD IM SORRY BUT THIS MADE ME LAUGH. WHAT A LINE. WHAT A LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i may actually have to draw this scene that image is SO wonderful. just cinder, staggering, exhausted, and she still manages to just spit that out. im screaming. shes a champion. i think she won this battle literally just there pack it up her burns come in more flavours than one.

Beneath Cinder, Hati turned, scanning for an escape, but she didn’t drop Sienna’s gaze. Wiping the sweat from her brow, she said, “I’m told I’m something of a menace.”

firstly: AAAAAAAAA HATI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BABY BOY OH NO THATS NO GOOD BAD TIMES AWFUL FEELS MY GUY!!!!!!!!!!!! secondly: CINDER THESE ZINGERS ARE UNREAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! JESUS CHRIST. I KNEW YOU LIED WHEN YOU DIDNT HAVE A SPEECH HOW MUCH MATERIAL HAVE YOU GOT IN THERE?????????

OH MY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

WAIT WHAT HANG ON

WHAT

WAIT

W H AT

okay wait hold on lets dial back i read ahead and dint live blog wait rthereghsdfgjhdffd HOLD ON

Cinder buried her face in Hati’s mane, hating them, hating, hating, hating. Black ichor clotted in Hati’s fur, tacky against her palms. Grimm didn’t have Auras to protect them, and exit wounds riddled Hati’s mighty body. Cinder’s heart lurched with fury. She could have screamed.

i read this bit and got STRESSED because hati is PEAK like hati didnt even fucking SHOW UP in og but i LOVE HIM and i knew shit would happen because its fucking offal hunt BUT

It should have been impossible at this distance, but Cinder could feel her gaze like traded blows, even nestled among the black of Hati’s pelt.

Sienna’s eyes shone like coins. They were cool, detached. Prepared.

She twisted her wrist and the whip flickered through the air in tight wheels. Its end glittered pale blue.

UH OH

Adrenaline cooled to permafrost in Cinder’s body, as though the Dust had already found its home between her ribs.

Cinder whispered, “Don’t.”

UH OH

Expressionless, Sienna gave a wide lash, and the jagged end of her whip released with a click. Silver sliced through the air, then through feathers and fur, with a sickening sound—wet and meaty as the arrowhead dagger buried itself deep into flesh. Hati’s whole body shuddered and Cinder only had a moment more before ice exploded from his ribs, ripping out through his pelt, even slicing into Cinder’s own skin. It speared him from deep inside, where the cartridge had sunk, impaling everything and rending him asunder.

JESUS JESUS CHRIST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

JESUS CHRIST WHAT A VISCERAL DEATH SCENE HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! O H N O T H A T S A N O G O O D V E R Y B A D T I M E

Cinder’s stomach jumped into her throat, and she held on tight to Hati, her bastion, her sanctuary, her family—held on tight like it would make any difference at all—like she could hold her family together with just her own two hands.

Hati dissolved right between her fingertips, and she plummeted alone.

like she could hold her family together with just her own two hands

OUGH what the FUCK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HEY THIS. HEY THIS SUCKED HEY THIS WAS A BAD CHAPTER WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT WAS HATI!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT WAS MY BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! GO TO HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EXCUSE ME????????? WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?????????? HELLO??????????? WHAT THE FUCK????????? SIENNA???????? BITCH?????????? GO TO H E L L

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[ineffablefool]

(1/4) hey uh ur bio says that u r demiromantic and if it's not too much trouble could i get some help? so i'm starting high school next year and so far, i haven't gotten a crush or anything. romantic attraction? don't know her. but whenever i thought or pictured myself "grown up" i imagined myself with a boyfriend. (i'm a woman) all the evidence is pointing towards me being aromantic, but a little slice of my brain is still, "oh, you're just super demiromantic and violently straight, all of your

(2/4) super close friends have been girls, you just have to become really close friends with a guy and there! instant boyfriend" but i know that won't happen. i won't have some man come and suddenly i'm head over heels. but i've always figured i'd have a boyfriend. i know i'm ace, and i am calling myself ace, but whenever i go to call myself aro, my brain goes "but what if ur actually demi and then all the people you told u were aro will think you were a liar" which i kNOW is stupid but i cant

(3/4) stop thinking it. i dunno why i can't fully accept the fact that i'm aro. is it society claiming that you need a partner to be happy? is it the fact that being in love sounds amazing and like floating on clouds and i want to feel like that? i have no fucking clue. and it's not something against aros, like, i know that if someone told me they were aro i'd have no problem with it. which makes it worse because why is it so hard to let go of the fantasy that i'll have a romantic partner one

(4/4) day? i know, in my heart, that there is a like a 1% chance i wont be aro. but i still cant call myself aro my brain won't let me >:( when did you get your first crush? when is it normal for a demi to first feel romantic attraction? did you think you were aro at first? also i sometimes feel like i shouldn't call myself ace bc im too young to know if i like sex yet? when did u start calling yourself ace? ugh sorry for the super long ask,,, also fun fact it's "how do u write kisses" anon hiii

Hi anon.  I cannot promise you excellent help, but I am still glad you wrote to me again, and I really hope you are about to have a straight 72-hour period of Good Days.  (It might take you that long to read this.  Oops.)

So, first of all: there is nothing wrong with calling yourself aro now and then later deciding you aren’t.  Or realizing you aren’t.  (Two different framings for the same thing -- both are good.)  Or deciding or realizing that you’re somewhere on the aromantic spectrum which you feel is better described with a more specific term.  Demiromantics are still part of the aro umbrella!  It’s not an exclusive club where You Must Be Pure Aro To Enter!  (Anyone who tells you otherwise is setting themselves up as Decider Of What It Really Means To Be Aro, and where are their credentials for that?  Hmm, hypothetical gatekeeping person?  Can I please see your certification from the Institute Of Defining Other People’s Identities For Them?  Oh.  Oh you don’t have one.  Because it doesn’t exist.)

Me saying that doesn’t magically make your brain accept the label, of course.  I am just trying to gently show your brain the door, and it’s the one that has to walk through it.

Assuming you want it to walk through it.  Maybe you decide you don’t.  That’s fine!  But “yes, I am indeed aro -- I am on the aro spectrum somewhere so I am using the label” is a perfectly fine thing to tell people, and if they are not carrying forged credentials from the Institute Of Defining Other People’s Identities For Them, then they will probably be okay with this.

I am not any kind of expert on being aro, or ace, or anything.  I am only an expert in being me.  But to somewhat exhaustively answer the questions from your last part...

I had my first crush when I was thirteen or fourteen.  When I was about ten, I was friends with two girls who both had a very public crush on the same boy, and I claimed to also have one on him in order to fit in, but I was completely lying.  Sorry, Drew.  I’m sure you were quite the catch, but I was not feelin’ it.

I don’t know if there’s a specific time when it’s “normal” for a demiromantic person to start feeling any particular way.  It just sort of happens if it’s gonna.  Maybe it never does.  People are complicated and different and that’s wonderful.

I didn’t know what being aro (or being ace!) was when I was your age, because they weren’t really identities yet.  “Asexual” was for amoebas, or maybe robots.  “Aromantic” was, like, dude, did you misspell “aromatic”?  (Keep in mind, there was technically an Internet in approx. 1995, but there was no Google, no Wikipedia, no YouTube, no social media, the concept of what is now called a “blog” didn’t even really exist yet, and often your parents would not let you on the Internet connection if they could even afford it themselves, not least because it was frequently billed by the amount of time you spent using it. It was incredibly hard to know what things existed in the world back then to even begin to learn about them! Now is so much better. I have all the treasures of the world in my pocket via my telephonic device.)  When I started to learn about asexuality, specifically that you could be ace but not be “an emotionless robot” (gosh has unlearning that kind of judgement been a journey), I jumped straight on that label and never looked back (this was roughly when I joined Tumblr, so I would have been about 32).  I thought I was alloromantic for a while after that, but I’ve come to realize that my feelings on romance probably put me somewhere on the aro spectrum.  And that’s where I am now.

I started calling myself ace, again, when I was about 32, but I didn’t have that label available to me when I was younger.  Ya boi was 13-14 years old, sitting in his bedroom writing letters-to-never-be-sent to his crush, which included long sections about how I had already decided I would never have sex so long as I lived, so once we obviously got married because how could we not when I had such Emotions, he would have to find some other way to get that if he wanted it.  I had no interest in it then.  I never developed an interest in it since.  If I had had the knowledge I have now, back when I was in junior high, I am absolutely convinced that I would have taken the ace label then.  Was I too young to know for sure?  I dunno, we don’t say that people are too young at that age to know they’re heterosexual, so why do other sexualities have to pass a higher bar?  (Because compulsory heterosexuality.  That is why.)

Regardless of your age, if the label of ace resonates with you, you can apply it to yourself.  If the label of aro resonates, you can apply it to yourself.  Or a more specific variant of either, or something else entirely.  And the day you realize “oh gosh, this is not, in this moment, actually me”, you can let the label go, because its only purpose for existing is to be useful to you.

Finally -- this is not something I can personally speak to, but I have seen people who identify as completely aro also state that they enjoy things that our (my? I do not know where you are from) culture frequently sees as romantic.  Like, if you want to have a person who you can snuggle up with, hold hands with, say “I love you” to and have them say it back and both of you mean it -- there are aro people who do all that with their partners, and enjoy it, and don’t see it as interfering with their aromantic identity at all.  I believe them, because they are the expert on being themselves, and I have nowhere near the ego required to decide that I know better.  So that’s something to keep in mind -- cloud-floating and an aromantic identity do not have to be completely separate, because there are lots of kinds of love and of affection, and people are complicated, and that is wonderful.

I hope you enjoy this novel, anon.  It is for you.

[kristoffsloveisntfragile]

Snow Day Spent Shoveling Away. Part 1

Rating: T (some swears, kissing scenes, mostly fluff)

Pairing: Kristoff/Anna

Summary: Modern AU; Anna calls Kristoff in desperation, as she needs to shovel her apartment complex’s front and back steps, along with the sidewalks in the front of the building. It was a promise she made to her sister that the landlord needed help with the incoming storm, but she went away for the weekend for her job. Her being the procrastinator she is, its the last day she has to do it and the snow is piled up. Will they be able to do it in time?

Notes: If you saw my tumblr post (a while back-sorry about that) when I shoveled the snow on the first snow day in my state, it read that I had a fanfiction idea brewing in my head the whole time I was shoveling. This is my first real time that I’m writing Kristanna fanfiction, I’ve written little stuff in the past, but it never made it past my notebooks/laptop. So this is the real first published piece. I hope you enjoy! (also i really tried with the title, idk if I like it still but there you go lol.)

~~~

*Vvv* *Vvv*…*Vvv* *Vvv*

Kristoff’s phone would not stop going off. He would answer it in a heartbeat too, if he wasn’t in a deep nap.

Soon enough though, his phone kept buzzing to the point it didn’t stop, and that woke him up. Being confused as to where the noise was coming from, he rubbed his eyes and face to shake the sleep out of his body. He found his phone slowly moving on the coffee table next to the couch he was on, being annoyed, thinking it was work trying to call him in. But it wasn’t, he looked at who was texting him and who were the missed calls from. All 43 messages and 4 missed called, all were from Anna.

Now 44 messages.

“Krisssss!!!!!!! WHY AREN’T YOU ANSWERING?!?!?!?!”

He chuckled, what could he possibly be dragged into now?

He sat up and dialed her up and put the phone to his ear. “Hey Anna, what do yo-”

“WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, I NEED YOUR HELP BADLY IM GONNA DIE I’M IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!!-”

“Woah, woah, woah, relax...and what? What’s going on why are you in trouble?” Kristoff said with genuine concern, even though he knew Anna is probably just being overdramatic and she’ll be fine with his help.

“Oh my God, so basically this weekend Elsa told me that I needed to shovel the front and back stairs because our landlord is off on vacation for something this weekend, and Elsa would’ve helped too but she also has to go away too for her job or whatever, so she left just me in charge, but I completely forgot about it until right now and she gets back in the morning and she’s gonna KILL ME if she finds out I didn’t do anything this weekend!!!!” Anna rambled on.

Kristoff was still trying to process everything she said, you know, seeing how he just came out of a nap. He took his free hand and ran it through his hair, knowing what she was going to ask of him to do, but still curious how much a job it was going to be.

“So anyway….can you come over and help me shovel the front and back stairs?” Anna asked, but held back a little, thinking that he was going to say no and she’ll just have to suffer and do it herself.

He sighed a little, hopefully not too loud or too long for her to hear, and said “Yeah, give me 5-10 mins and I’ll be over.” He started to get up to put on his jacket and boots, when he heard a squeal through the phone and a resounding “THANK YOU SO MUCH KRISTOFF I LOVE Y-..SEE YOU SOON!!!” And she hung up. He smiled as he put the phone in his pocket and continued putting on his shoes.

His smile grew bigger as he realized that she started to say “I love you.” He was sure that it was just in a friendly way, because he was also sure that Anna didn’t feel the same way as he did. That thought made him go sour so he decided to stop thinking about it.

Oh well.. at least he still gets to spend time with her, right?

~~~

Kristoff drove to Anna’s apartment and took a space in the parking lot. Anna was patiently waiting in the hall inside the apartment to get started, and saw that he was pulling in and ran out the door to see him.

He got out of the truck and was instantly met with a leaping Anna, somehow managing to get through the snow that was up to her calf, jumping into him and hugging him and saying “Thank you so much again for doing this with me!” Anna let go of Kristoff, even though he barely had time to give back the hug. “I was literally going to breakdown and cry if I had to do this by myself.” Anna looked into Kristoff’s eye with grateful eyes.

“Well, you know me, always here to help.” He shrugged and then laughed, she joined the laugh, and quickly turned around to go back to the front hall and get the shovels, and he followed.

“So is it just these steps and the back?” Kristoff asked over the wind as it started to pick up.“Yeah, and maybe just a little bit of the sidewalk, so there can be a path for the people so they can get to the parking lot.” She said with a little uncertainty in her voice, still hoping Kristoff wouldn’t back out of it this early into it. But he still was going with it, like he said, he was there to help.

Anna went back into the hall and got the two heavy duty shovels “We’ll get different ones when we have to do the stairs, seeming how they’ll be smaller.” Anna turned to Kristoff and handed him a shovel. Kristoff looked at what they had to do and back to Anna. It was just flurrying out, and some snowflakes were gently placed on her hair, and scattered all across her hat. And you couldn’t tell from a quick glance, but since Kristoff was already looking, he could see the flakes that landed on her eyelashes and some on her cheeks, but some had melted, probably because of her warmth, Kristoff assumed.

Anna was gazing out at what they had to get done, and suddenly got a boost of confidence and said, “We can do this, it won’t be that long!” Anna jumped down the stairs. Kristoff was more worried if she was going to hurt herself with all this snow and possible black ice underneath.

“What area should I focus on?” Kristoff asked.

“Uh, from here to here,” she pointed to a section of the snow to the street, “That’s the sidewalk, and of course right here, so you know, you don’t have to jump from the stairs to the sidewalk. And a little pathway over there,” pointing to where they trudged through earlier, “So people can get  to the parking lot.” She finished with a worry look creeping up on her free. Kristoff knew to her it looked like it was more than she can chew.

“Hey, it’s gonna be fine. I’ll start the sidewalk, why don’t you do the stairs here.” Kristoff suggested as he went down the stairs.

“Oh the easier work, huh?” Anna pouted but still had a hint of a smirk, and came close to Kristoff, like she was trying to intimidate him.

“Well do you wanna be sore doing all the more tough work?” Kristoff smirked back.

“...No.” Anna scrunched up her face and went to the stairs.

They started their section and were pretty quiet as they were just trying to get all this work over with. Up until Anna came across a bump in the ...snow

“Ugh I hate it when this happens…” Anna kept at it trying to do it up. Kristoff looked over and admired the hard work she put into the stairs so far.

Anna started chipping away the block with her shovel until she decided to use her hands. Dropping the shovel, crouching, she began pawing at it like a dog. Kristoff chuckled and came over to help, dropping his shovel in the snow too.

“Here, try this…” Kristoff lined the block, dogging at the edges to separate it from the ground. Anna decided to let him have it. Almost thinking, ‘Less work for me though, right?’ And then she caught glimpse of Kristoff face. They’d been out there for sometime so his cheeks and nose were a rosy pink. Anna admired it, it looked like he was constantly blushing, and she thought it was cute. She didn’t realize she was staring for so long until finally got the block separated from the stair.

“Ah, there we go.” Kristoff gasped, then lifted the snow block. It was as big as Kristoff’s chest.

“Well no wonder I couldn’t get it, it’s as big as you!” Anna exclaimed. Kristoff rolled his eyes, “Thanks.” then laughed and tossed the block to the pile that both him and Anna started.

“I mean that in a good way. Why do you think I asked for your help? You’re the strongest man I know. And look.. You’ve got most of it done! I say that’s a job well done. “ Anna rambled on, probably saying more than needed.

“...Thanks Anna.” Anna couldn’t tell if he was actually blushing now, but it definitely put a smile on his face. He retrieved his shovel and went back to it.

Anna smiled too, but then realized that she made it sound like she was using him...she hoped he actually got the compliment she was trying to give. She turned to see him work, bit her lip, but turned to get back to the stairs.

Another while passed and both of them were at a point where they couldn’t stop sniffing from the sold and they were fatigued so much they were breathing heavily.

For her, Anna took one big sniff and breath and got the last piece off the stairs to the other big pile.

“Agh, yes I finished the steps!” Anna didn’t have the energy to jump around and be happy, she was breathing heavily, but very relieved. Kristoff was looking at her and did have a smile, but it was an exhausted one from the work he had done. He got the sidewalk to be visible but he had barely started on the pile in front of the stairs.

“Oh right, well let’s get this part, I guess.” the excitement dying in her voice. But then she looked to Kristoff where he was stretching his lower back, and then his shoulder.

“Are you okay?” Anna asked with concern in her voice and face.

“Hm? Oh yeah, it just gets a little tiring after a while.” He was still stretching his shoulder.

“Yeah, I’m starting to feel it too.” Anna stretched her back and the sound of cracking went all down her back. “Damn…And my hands are like, stiff from the shovel.” She stretched out her fingers too.

Kristoff sympathized and then really looked at Anna. She was pretty bundled up, but he could tell she was starting to freeze. He was thinking about just taking a rest, but he knew Anna would flip and say they have to get it done before the night is over. It was already starting to get dark out, and they still had the back stairs to do. They were both starting to get a little worried.

Then all of a sudden, an idea he wish he thought of earlier, came to him.

“Oh my God,” He started to laugh at himself as he was patting his jacket for his phone.

“What?” Anna asked.

He found his phone and headed to the hall in the building, and found the person he needed and called them. Anna was confused as ever, but a hint of worry as she hoped nothing bad was happening and he had to leave her to the rest.

“Hello?” A voice came through the phone.

“Hey, Sven!” Kristoff happily replied. “Hey, are you still at work?”

“About to clock out, what’s up?” Sven asked.

“Well, I’m here with Anna helping shovel her apartment building and stairs and such. I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind coming by with one of your plow trucks and help us out?” Anna’s face changed to pure happiness as she realized he was getting help.

“Yeah! That’s no problem at all! I have to take one home anyway to do my own driveway.” Sven replied an Kristoff was relieved he could help.

“Oh man, thank you so much, I owe you one!” Kristoff said.

“Awe, no you don’t… or maybe, I haven’t decided yet.” Sven laughed. “Just give me the address and I’ll be there 5-10 minutes.”

Kristoff was giving the address as Anna was bouncing next to him, being so happy that he did this.

“Alright I’ll be there soon, bye!” Sven said and hung up, and Kristoff put the phone away from his ear but immediately got attacked by Anna’s hug.

She jumped and hugged him and wrapped her legs around his waist and tightly squeezed. “Thank you Kristoff Bjorgman! I am in you debt!” She basically screamed into his ear. Kristoff returned the hug, mostly just to keep her from falling, but he was blessed with this hug, he felt like.

God only knows how long they hugged for. After a minute or two it wasn’t in excitement of getting help, it was just them wanting to hold each other. They soon realized it could get awkward any minute so they let go of each other, Kristoff putting Anna to the floor, but both of their hands still on each other. Anna’s on his shoulders, still sliding slowly to his chest, Kristoff’s on Anna’s waist. They looked at each other, both smiling and both looking deep into each other’s eyes.

‘Is this really happening?’ Kristoff and Anna thought, probably at the same time.

Anna cleared her throat as another thought entered her mind, deterring them from anymore thoughts of Kristoff.

Kristoff was concerned about why she looked away so fast, but it was probably for the best that they stopped what they were doing.

“Uh, how long do you expect until Sven gets here?” Anna asked, refocused on the task both of them were there for.

“Uh, let’s see…” He checked his phone and saw the call time was about 3 minutes ago. “It’s only been 3 minutes, he said about 5-10, so probably not that much longer.” He said

“Hm, well we still have to do the backstairs, but these shovels are too big for them, there’s more shovels in the basement. I’ll be right back.” She went to the door that leads to the basement.

Kristoff looked out the window to see if Sven would arrive soon. But he got lost in his own thoughts about how Anna’s mood totally shifted, like something in her head just switched. But that would’ve been a perfect moment for him to kiss her. God how he wanted to kiss her. They were practically close enough that a swift movement would close the space and seal the deal. But it didn’t happen. Would it ever happen? He wouldn’t know and don't know when he will.

Anna came back with two smaller shovels, definitely made for stair shoveling and waited with Kristoff by the window. It wasn’t long until Sven came, he parked by the sidewalk as Kristoff and Anna were coming out of the hall, met by the even colder wind than before.

“Hey guys!” Sven had a big bright smile on his face that you couldn’t help but smile too.

“Hey!” they said in almost unison.

“So where exactly do you need the snow to go?” Sven asked them.

“Well, I need this pile and pathway clear, and a path to get to the parking lot end to the back stairs.” Anna gestured with each place she needed plowed.

“Easy work! It’ll be done in no time!” Sven got out of park and went to work, and Anna and Kristoff went back on the stairs to get out of the way.

Usually plowing in a pretty small and enclosed space like Anna’s apartment is hard, but Sven made it look easy.They marveled at the job and were happy to see the black/grayish stone ground again.

Anna was beaming, but that didn’t stop her from being cold. Her teeth started to chatter and soon the cold air slipped into her jacket. She shivered for a bit.

Kristoff noticed her shiver, and asked “Are you cold?”

She looked up at him, “A little…” and then back at Sven’s works. Kristoff debated it it would be weird if he hugged her so she would be warm. But she seemed a little distant ever since earlier. He decided against it.

Sven stopped and called out to Anna through the passenger window. “Hey Anna, how much of a path you want?”

Anna walked over and looked down where the parking lot and the side of the building was. “Just do your best to get it all the way down, but make sure to put the snow in that corner. It’s a parking spot, but no one uses it.” She said to Sven.

“Gotcha!” Sven started up again, and Kristoff came over to observe.

Sven and his truck worked like magic, he got the parking lot done in no time. He drove up to Anna and Kristoff and said, “All done!”

Anna jumped in happiness. “Yay! Thank you so much Sven, you shaved off a couple hours for us!” Anna exclaimed.

“It was no problem at all. Well, I gotta do my own home now, see you guys later.” He stuck his hand out to shake Kristoff’s hand, which he reached out to meet it.

“See you soon and thanks again.” And with that, Sven drove off.

“Well we still have the back stairs. That won’t take long, let’s go!” She said with enthusiasm in her voice.

“I see your excited again.” Kristoff followed her where she was getting the shovels.

“Yeah, because when we’re done, we can have hot chocolate! Now, I can’t wait!” Anna bounced her way to the back of the building.

Kristoff chuckled, then realized, ‘..We?..’

[2jaepg]

...butthead

request by @straybubs: seungmin and jisung friends to lover kinda thing?

Submit a fic request here, or leave a comment on my series on ao3!

Word Count: 2.7k Notes: this is three whole months late and i apologize for that! but here it finally is~ i hope you enjoy~    read it on ao3 here Summary: seungmin's brother wants an xbox, seungmin just wants to play DDR, and jisung just wants to be annoying can be considered a prequel to spiegel im spiegel

“Seungmin! Come on,” Seungcheol whines. “Hurry up, we’re going to be late to the arcade!”

“Stop whining at me,” Seungmin complains, taking his sweet time tying double knots on his shoelaces. “Aren’t you supposed to be the older one?”

Seungcheol doesn’t bother to respond with more than some aggressive foot tapping and a glare thrown Seungmin’s way.

“Whatever. It’s not like anybody’s waiting for you at the arcade. I’m ready now,” Seungmin finishes, straightening up and grabbing his bag.

Seungcheol scoffs, “Actually, my friends are waiting. And show some respect, I’m your hyung.”

Seungmin follows his brother out, mumbling curses under his breath as he struggles to right his bike before finally kicking it in rage. When Seungcheol only rolls his eyes and starts to bike off, Seungmin panics for a moment, shouting, “Hyung! Wait!” as he clambers on quickly, suffering a small scrape to his knee.

He bikes furiously to catch up and is fuming the entire way to the arcade. When they get there, Seungmin just shoves his bike off to the side before storming in, and Seungcheol has to lock it up on his behalf with a roll of his eyes. “Kids these days,” he mutters, as if he himself isn’t also a child.

Inside, Seungcheol just nods to Seungmin quickly before they run off, Seungmin over to the DDR section and Seungcheol off to shoot some monsters or aliens or something.

Over by the DDR machine, there’s a small group of older kids playing around on the highest difficulty level, missing all of the steps. Seungmin watches them with amusement and the tiniest bit of haughty pride, knowing that he’s much, much better considering all of his hours of practice while waiting for Seungcheol to finish up his games.

The kids finish up, and Seungmin is just about to go up to slot a few coins into the slot when suddenly some other kid his age runs up and takes his spot.

“What the heck?” Seungmin says, shoving the kid aside. “I was clearly in line.”

“What’s your problem?” the kid asks, shoving Seungmin back. “I got the coins in first, butthead. Not my fault you’re slow.”

Seungmin huffs, even angrier now. “Really? You’re going to call me a butthead?”

“Yeah,” the kid says. “Because you are. Butthead.”

Seungmin opens his mouth to retaliates, then sighs and shakes his head. He will be the bigger man, and he graciously steps aside to wait his turn again as the kid snickers at him, turning back to the machine to pick a song.

Seungmin watches him pick out a song and snickers to himself as the kid chooses the most difficult song at the expert level. He knows there’s no way the kids going to get more than twenty seconds through the song before failing out from past experience, but then he watches the determination course through his body, he watches the tight grip he has on the back bars, he realizes he’s watching a real professional. Or, at least as professional as a seven-year-old kid in an arcade can get.

Seungmin watches with wide eyes and a mouth ready to catch flies, eyes barely able to keep up with how fast the kid moves on the machine. Before he knows it, the song is over and the kid is flouncing in front of Seungmin, victorious with his A+ score.

“Hah! You see? I bet you couldn’t beat that, butthead,” the kid says, and Seungmin snaps his mouth shut.

“Whatever, you’re like, six,” Seungmin mutters.

“I’m not! I’m nine years old thanks a lot, butthead.”

“What?” Seungmin says, shocked. The kid is way too short to be a nine year old. He only comes up to Seungmin’s ears, maybe. And Seungmin is short for nine years old, even though he’d never admit it, which means that this kid has to be like, five or something. And so he tells him so, “You’re not nine, I’m nine!”

“You know more than one person can be nine, idiot,” the kid says. “Now I’m playing again,” he turns back to the machine, hand hovering to slot in another coin when Seungmin jumps forward.

“No, it’s my turn!” Seungmin says, shoving the kid aside. He thrusts his token in, but that doesn’t stop the other bully from shoving him back and pushing a random button on the screen. “What? Hey, I hate that song!”

“Too bad, loser, guess you have to dance it now. Unless you want to let me dance?” the kid says, blinking sweetly at Seungmin. Oh, how Seungmin wishes he could punch that smile off of his face.

“No. My token, my dance.” With a strength and determination that he’s only seen on his brother’s face when challenged to eat five foot long hot dogs in one sitting, he steps up to the board. Time passes in a blur as his feet move all over the pad and finally, he finishes, fist pumped up in the air as he celebrates. “Take that!”

“Oh nice moves,” the kid holds out his hand, ready for a high five.

“Oh, um, sure. Thanks,” Seungmin says, reaching to grab the kid’s hand when suddenly he swerves and dabs instead.

“Haha sike! See you next time, loser!” he yells, running off to his mom.

“My name’s not loser! It’s Seungmin, dumb butt!” Seungmin calls. He would stomp his foot, too, but he’s broken out of that habit after Seungcheol made fun of him telling him he looked like a bratty girl.

“And I’m Jisung, loser,” the kid, Jisung, shouts, turning around one last time to stick out his tongue at Seungmin before disappearing between the machines of the arcade.

Seungmin shakes his head, trotting off to blow his tickets on the rigged claw machine. He gets two rubber duckies, and names one Jisung.

—

Somehow, over the course of the month that Seungcheol spends forcing Seungmin to follow him along in his pursuits to win an Xbox by gathering all 200,000 tickets necessary to trade, Seungmin finds himself becoming friends with Jisung. Or well, as close as two boys who still only call each other dumb butt and loser can get, he supposes.

They still try to outscore each other on the DDR machine, until a parent waiting in line behind them yells at them to stop hogging it so that their spoiled prissy child gets a chance, after which they run to the claw machine and try to push it over. Once they get in trouble for that, too, Jisung’s mom comes over and buys them both some popsicles so that they’ll sit down and stop causing headaches all over.

“Thank you, Mrs. Han,” Seungmin smiles, all sweetness and smiles whenever a parent walks by.

When Jisung rolls his eyes and mutters, “Ew, you’re so fake,” he earns himself a hard scuff on the back of his neck as his mother smiles down at Seungmin.

“Jisung, you really should learn some manners from your new friend here. I’m taking away that popsicle until you say thank you,” she scolds, all while cooing at Seungmin as he smiles, teeth stained red from the cherry flavoring.

“Thanks, mom,” Jisung mutters before grabbing Seungmin’s hand to run back off into the arcade. “Come on, let’s go.”

“Okay,” Seungmin says, toddling off after him. “Bye Mrs. Han!”

Seungmin is content, to say the least.

—

Another month passes, and Seungcheol stops coming to the arcade so that he can stay home and play on his XBox. On a random afternoon when he’s feeling kind of nice, and also decides that maybe he can win some more games with tickets, he takes Seungmin back to the arcade.

There, standing at the DDR machine, as usual, is Jisung.

“Hey, butthead!” Seungmin shouts, running up to the kid. “You’re taller, no way!”

“Shut up, where have you been, loser?” Jisung says punching Seungmin in the shoulder. It hurts a bit more than he expected.

“My brother is too old for arcade games now apparently. Sounds like a loser to me, sitting at home all day. He hasn’t got any friends, though, so we should be sorry for him,” Seungmin says, all the while looking around to make sure that Seungcheol actually isn’t around to hear him.

“Oh. But then what do you do then,” Jisung asks as they make their way over to the skeeball machines.

“I usually just read, and, uh, sing,” Seungmin says. There’s a pause, and Seungmin kind of wishes he hadn’t said it. “It’s like, whatever. My brother says it’s a sissy thing, I just get bored sometimes, my mom used to sing before she got busy with work so like—“

“Hey, that’s so cool!” Jisung cuts him off. They tend to do that, cutting into each other’s conversations mercilessly, just as they push each other off the DDR mat or punch the machine to throw off the pinball. Seungmin likes to think that it’s kind of their thing.

“Really?” Seungmin asks. “I’ve actually never told anybody before but, I think I want to be a singer.”

Jisung nodes enthusiastically, completely missing the holes as the ball ricochets off the side of the machine and comes bouncing back to them. “Our family actually owns the karaoke place down the block, do you wanna go sometime? My sister literally spends all her time there, she thinks she’s going to be a singer but she’s really, really bad, I’m sure you’re a lot better— Woah!” Jisung ducks down as Seungmin’s toss goes a little too far to the left and directly into Seungmin’s side.

“Wait, really?” Seungmin says, no longer concerned about the scores flickering on the screen.

“Yeah, so long as you don’t kill me first,” Jisung answers. “Now hand me my ball, I still have three shots left. Also, you can pay me with all the tickets you earn today.”

—

Jisung’s mom makes Jisung give back Seungmin’s tickets because the karaoke rooms are open to Jisung’s friends for free. Jisung pouts but gets over it pretty quickly as he punches in some rap song with way too many expletives to be appropriate for their age.

As he mumbles rap lyrics that go by too fast for him to repeat properly, Seungmin laughs and claps along to the beat. As the song finishes, Jisung runs over and throws the mic at Seungmin’s face.

“Ow! You almost hit me, loser!”

“Whatever,” Jisung says, pulling over the book. “Pick a song, it’s your turn. And don’t sing Taylor Swift or I’m telling my mom to kick you out.”

“Okay, I wouldn’t have anyway,” Seungmin mutters, punching in some numbers. (He actually would have, but he doesn’t want to risk it quite yet.)

As he sings, he closes his eyes and sways along to the beat, humming with the instrumentals between verses. Once the song finishes, there’s a long silence, and he’s almost afraid to open his eyes and see Jisung’s reaction.

He opens one eye at time, slowly, and looks up to see Jisung seated on the couch still, mouth hanging wide open. “Was it that bad?” Seungmin asks.

Jisung just shakes his head slowly.

“Well, close your mouth,” Seungmin says, going back over to drink some of the orange juice Jisung’s mother had brought them.

“Dude.”

“What.”

“You are. Really. Good.”

“Oh. Thank you.”

“Yeah.”

Seungmin sniffles a little bit to fill up the silence.

“A billion times better than my sister.”

Seungmin laughs, punching Jisung’s shoulder lightly. It’s more of just a nudge, really. “That’s mean.”

“Whatever, it’s a compliment you idiot,” Jisung says, pulling the remote back over to him. “Now sing Nobody with me!”

“What? I can’t sing Taylor Swift but Wonder Girls is allowed?”

“Fine, you can sing Taylor Swift but if I get a higher score, you owe me sixty tickets.”

“Bet.”

—

“Mom, I’m home!” Seungmin calls as he gets home from karaoke. Mrs. Han had given him a ride back, and Jisung and Seungmin had sung along to the radio all the way back.

“Seungmin!” his mother’s voice calls from the kitchen, and he knows from just those two syllables that he’s in trouble, even though he isn’t sure what he’s done wrong.

“Uh, hi mommy,” Seungmin says, scooting his butt over to the kitchen. “Is there something wrong?”

“Where have you been all day? Your brother was supposed to be watching you!” her arms are crossed as she stands by the counter, and Seungmin doesn’t recall seeing her so upset before.

“I was with Jisung, at karaoke,” Seungmin mutters meekly.

One of her eyebrows raise, and Seungmin knows it was the wrong answer. “And you didn’t think to tell anybody?”

“I told Seungcheol when we left the arcade!” Seungmin answers defensively. He really had, it wasn’t his fault that Seungcheol was too busy shooting monsters or something to notice.

“What? KIM SEUNGCHEOL,” she yells, and Seungmin isn’t sure whether he should be sorry for throwing his brother under the bus or grateful that the attention has been turned off of himself. There’s a thundering of footsteps as Seungcheol makes his way down the stairs, earbuds still dangling from his ears.

“What?” It’s the wrong thing to say with the wrong attitude at this moment.

“You did not tell me that you and your brother were at the arcade today. Is that all you’ve been doing these past few months? Going to the arcade when you get the chance? You should have been at home, studying!” As their mother goes on a tirade, Seungmin goes to inch out the door and back up to his room. Sadly, he is spotted by the danger before he can escape. “And you young man, don’t think I’m done with you yet.”

“Sorry, mom.” Meek is definitely the way to go when their mother is angry.

“I wanted to talk to both of you anyway. Your father has gotten a promotion, so we’re moving to America. Both of you are grounded for the next few weeks, and you can use this time to pack.”

“What?!” Seungmin and his brother both speak at the same time, arguing as they try to protest.

“Both of you, be quiet and go to your rooms.”

“Okay, mom.”

They bump shoulders as they run up the stairs, shoving at each other as they each say, “It’s your fault, no, it’s your fault!”

That’s the last day that Seungmin sees Jisung.

—

As Seungmin stands in the middle of his sparsely furnished apartment, boxes stacked all over, he shrugs a little smile. It’s strange to be back in his home country after so many years, and he wonders if he’ll even be able to assimilate as he tries to shrug off the American habits that have been so embedded into his shoulders from living the entirely of his teenage years there.

He’s here now though, part-time jobs as an English tutor and vocal trainer tucked under his belts as he heads out to whatever auditions he can and submits his headshot and portfolio to any agencies he comes across. It’s not much, but it’s a start and he’ll make of it what he can.

There’s just one thing that he needs to do.

Crouching down, he digs through some boxes until he comes across a stack of papers that he’d been looking for. Inside, he pulls out a little Photobooth polaroid from an arcade that’s probably shut down by now. It’s enough for now, and he mentally traces the path that he’d always taken with his brother day after day on his bikes.

As he walks down the street, he looks around and notices just how much this city has changed in the years that he’s been gone. Newer, shinier buildings have been built up around him, and people seem to walk at a faster pace.

Before he knows it, he’s reached his destination. Seungmin walks up the steps slowly, excited even though he’s not expecting much.

“Hello, welcome to K-Sing! How may we help you!” a chirpy voice calls from the front desk. Somehow, Seungmin recognizes it.

“I didn’t think you’d still be here after all these years.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Hi, Jisung. It’s me. Seungmin. I still owe you those tickets, right?”

[eggroll-sushi]

1-150 ask mem

first of all, fuc k yoou

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

my mom??

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

outgoing around friends

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

u

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i dont know, ive heard that no one really hates me but like i find it difficult to find someone who i actually enjoy talking to

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

i dont really have any interest in anyone rn so... yes? id take care of myself

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

so far everyone that ive liked is a either a nerd or a pretty shitty person so like ,

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

no

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

in what way?? idk im still thinking of this oe guy he had his pants pulled up pretty high with a tight belt on and a big nose. im not thinking in a romantic way or anything i just... it was a weird combination. . ..his hair was ok i guess

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

uh yeah if its not in the brash or crude humor way

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“probably”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

killer - bastille, yeah i dont have any others that stand out particularly

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

i have curly hair so we just both suffer if they try running their hands through... but if i had a romantic s/o i probably wouldnt mind bein petted

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

yes? i think so

15. What good thing happened this summer?

i hung out with friends a lot.. .i think i dont remember

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

yeah i lovemy mom

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

scary either way.. but the universe is pretty big so i guess

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

not really theyre an asshole mostly

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i havent taken a bath in like 4 years.. but yes

20. Do you like your neighbors?

we do not talk

21. What are you bad habits?

being rude and disrespectful and aggressive

22. Where would you like to travel?

europe.. japan.. idk

23. Do you have trust issues?

no

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

sleeping and eating

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

i really dont know.. its like an all around tie.. .

26. What do you do when you wake up?

brush teeth and wash face, change into outside wear if im going outside, lotion my face and put on mascara, make tea/breakfast

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

overall just smoother.. like a more even tone.. but darker i guess

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

y ou

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

ive dated.. once but i didn’t even like the guy.. i just said yes because it was like. .mmkfkucin 5th grade and then he broke up with me (i didnt care tbh) and then asked me back?? it was weird because he told me he was breaking up because he found.. someone hotter or something and they said if he dumped me they would date him and they didnt.. .it was wild tbh i dont really know why they did this it was like 6th grade. ......... ... .anyways

30. Do you ever want to get married?

theoretically, yes? but idk it seems exhausting and i cant grasp the concept of someone actually liking me for so long

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

fuck i dont know i dont really think about that buds

33. Spell your name with your chin.

gthhju-asnhhy

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

no unless robotics counts

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

tv

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

yes

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

i just try to do something funny

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

nice, a kind person, likeable, liberal, ,

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

tjmaxx, marshalls, burlington. i go stright to that mf clearance section

40. What do you want to do after high school?

perferably die, but thats unlikely so i wanna go into a good college, make friends, get a decent job

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

my mind says yes but my heart says no

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean?

1) tired 2) mad 3) i cant/dont wanna make conversation 4) im just .. zoned out

43. Do you smile at strangers?

if they smile first

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

im fucking terrified of both

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

i have to go to school or i feel like shit

46. What are you paranoid about?

every time im disrespectful, aggressive, or really any action that i make

47. Have you ever been high?

no

48. Have you ever been drunk?

no

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

sure

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

it was a brownish orange (a coat with a hood)

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

ye

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

give myself a massive sponge dick

53. Favourite makeup brand?

i dont really wear makeup.. i like ChapStick

54. Favourite store?

tjmaxx

55. Favourite blog?

@eggroll-sushi​

56. Favourite colour?

orange? either a peachy orange or a borwnish orange. but i can appreciate a good palette

57. Favourite food?

id say pho but i like a lot of foods

58. Last thing you ate?

oreos and milk

59. First thing you ate this morning?

blueberry english muffin with honey butter

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

recently my team won a robotics comp

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

no

62. Been arrested? For what?

jesus no

63. Ever been in love?

no

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

well ... my mo was telling me goonight-- (i havent had one)

65. Are you hungry right now?

yeah

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

my tungle friends are also my irl friends

67. Facebook or Twitter?

twitter (i dont use either)

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr? i hate it tho

69. Are you watching tv right now?

n o

70. Names of your bestfriends?

you know who

71. Craving something? What?

food.. savory junk food........olives, nachos, ,,

72. What colour are your towels?

white

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

two, but i have 3 on my bed

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

i just keep em on my bed yeah

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

4 on my bed (god bless your soul, okoshi, wherever you are) but like.. 10 total?

75. Favourite animal?

cat but i also like most animals

76. What colour is your underwear?

its currently gray

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

dark chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

blue moon

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

black with white text

80. What colour pants?

shades of gray

81. Favourite tv show?

su? i dont really watch any others

82. Favourite movie?

the man from uncle movie/ kingsman

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

mean girls?

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

mean girls i guess

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

idk

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

starfish

87. First person you talked to today?

mom

88. Last person you talked to today?

you

89. Name a person you hate?

protein shake (jk)

90. Name a person you love?

my mother

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

maybe

92. In a fight with someone?

im constantly in a fight

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

one

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

many, over 10

95. Last movie you watched?

Logan

96. Favourite actress?

janelle monae always looks stunning

97. Favourite actor?

uhhhhhhhhh dwayne is a friend

98. Do you tan a lot?

yes?

99. Have any pets?

no

100. How are you feeling?

sick

101. Do you type fast?

not really

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

yes

103. Can you spell well?

yeah i guess

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah i suppose

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

i went on a camping enrichment?

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

no?

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah

108. What should you be doing?

studying for histry quiz

109. Is something irritating you right now?

yes

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

no?

111. Do you have trust issues?

im pretty sure this was already asked

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

mom?

113. What was your childhood nickname?

ass (im still a kid, right?)

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

when someone has one

116. Are you listening to music right now?

no

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yes

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yes

119. Favourite book?

harry potteR?

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

yes

121. Are you mean?

yes

122. Is cheating ever okay?

no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

no. once i stepped in a massive puddle and got wet like halfway up my calf

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

no

125. Do you believe in true love?

n..yes?

126. Are you currently bored?

yes

127. What makes you happy?

friends, having a good time, making people laugh

128. Would you change your name?

no

129. What your zodiac sign?

scorpio

130. Do you like subway?

yeah

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

we would both suffer

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

you (this is a repeat again)

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

//

134. Can you count to one million?

i could, yes

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

bro idk

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed

137. How tall are you?

5′4″?

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i have curly hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette

140. Summer or Winter?

summer

141. Night or Day?

cant choose

142. Favourite month?

november

143. Are you a vegetarian?

no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

dark

145. Tea or Coffee?

tea

146. Was today a good day?

eh i guess

147. Mars or Snickers?

mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“you’re like shaggy from scooby doo; always alone”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

yes? im scared of them so

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“’You will blow your eyes out,’ said Nwoye’s mother...” (Things Fall Apart)