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haikyunicorn · 4 years

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oikawa, atsumu and osamu with an s/o who fainted

anonymous asked: “Hello!~ I love your writing :D May I request HCs with how Oikawa and the Miya twins would react and how they’d take care of a fem!s/o that passed out and didn’t wake up right away because she was in a lot of pain + holding out a lot? (im not sure if that makes sense) I always have episodes where I faint and have a lot of pain and I’d really love to see how some of my fave characters would be 🥺”

warning(s): descriptions of fainting

oikawa tooru

Oikawa is always perceptive and observant even if he doesn’t show it, and he’s always looking out for his s/o

If you show the slightest symptoms of being in pain, he’ll be subtly watching over you for the rest of the day, like he’ll make some excuses to tag along with you everywhere

Oikawa isn’t a stranger to overworking himself and then having to hide the painful aftermath of it, so he’s recognising some of familiar behaviour from you

He’ll be asking if you’re feeling okay, if you’d like some water, if you need to sit down

His suspicion only grows if you keep denying him, brushing him off and saying you’re fine, but he won’t push it any further

At least that was the plan until he notices you kind of spacing out next to him, your lips paler than usual, small beads of sweat starting to form on your skin and your expression twisted into discomfort

He puts a hand on your shoulder and tries to get your attention, asking once again if you’re feeling okay

Whether you heard him or not, you find it hard to focus, dark spots dancing in your vision, nausea collecting in your throat, the ground feels like it’s spinning and a ringing in your ear gradually gets louder, tuning out Oikawa’s concerned voice

The last thing you vaguely remember is stumbling forward into your boyfriend’s grasp before passing out

When Oikawa feels your body slacken and you start to sway, his heart drops in his chest and he quickly moves in front of you to support your body

Despite his panic, he’s quick to perform the first aid he knows, carrying you to a shady, less crowded area

He lays you down on your back and puts his bag under your legs, wetting a towel with some water and dabbing it on your face and neck

All the while one of his hands is holding yours - partly to check for a pulse and partly because his own hand is shaking - and he’s calling out your name and asking if you can hear him

His fear doubles when he realises you’re not coming to as soon as he expected and Oikawa decides to take you to the nurse’s office, practically running there

He sits and tries not to fidget too much as the nurse runs proper examinations on you and he feels relief course through him when he sees that you’re finally awake and talking quietly to the nurse

After the nurse clears you and leaves the both of you alone, Oikawa pulls up a chair next to the bed and asks if you’re feeling better

He makes light conversation with you for a moment before quietly asking if you know why you had fainted

When you finally admit you’d been holding back some pain, Oikawa feels heart ache for you and he can’t help the slight guilt in his chest, wishing he’d intervened sooner

Still, he does his best to put up a cheery front for you, not wanting to stress you out even more

He makes you promise to tell him next time, no matter what he’s doing, he wants to know if you’re hurt or if you need help

After resting a little more in the nurse’s office and making sure you’ve completely recovered, Oikawa walks you home and insists on carrying your stuff and, if you let him, carry you on his back

At your house, he makes you sit down on the couch or on your bed while he goes to get you a drink and something to eat

For the rest of the day, he doesn’t let you lift a finger and will do anything for you and spoils you with all the cuddles and kisses you want to help you relax

miya atsumu

Atsumu isn’t always the most gentle with his words, but he still lets you know he cares in his own way

When he notices something off about you, he’ll kind of glance at you for a few moments, trying to figure out what’s wrong

When he ends up drawing a blank, he’ll straight up ask you what’s wrong

“Oi, what’s up with you today?”

He won’t take “it’s nothing, i’m fine” because he knows something’s wrong and he hates it when people bullshit him

So he’ll keep pressing you for an actual answer until he gets one

That is, until you suddenly pass out

His quick reflexes allow him to catch you before you hit the ground, but his mind temporarily short-circuits due to the shock

Atsumu starts calling out your name, lightly shaking you and trying to get you to wake up

When you don’t respond, he only gets more frantic and it takes Kita or someone nearby to instruct him to take you to the nurse’s office

Once he sets you down on the bed, he’s already asking the nurse all the questions

“What’s wrong with her? Will she be okay? Is she gonna wake up soon?”

The nurse has to give him a stern glare and shoo him out while she runs check ups on you

Atsumu, more than anything, is frustrated. That you didn’t tell him anything and that he doesn’t know how to help you right now

Still, he forces himself to sit and wait, a frown and a little pout on his face

When the nurse finally opens the door, he immediately shoots up from his seat and asks again if you’re okay and if he can see you

Relief replaces all his confusion when he sees you already awake and visibly better than before

He’s quick to move to your side and almost demands to know what happened, and you, cornered in the bed, have no other choice but to admit

Atsumu’s jaw tighten at your explanation and his mind is running a mile an hour, wondering why you didn’t just tell him instead of holding out your pain

He doesn’t voice out his thoughts, though, opting to reprimand you with a mumbled “you should have just told me”

Per the nurse’s orders, he lets you rest a bit, getting you something to drink, before he takes you home

All throughout the journey to your home, Atsumu keeps glancing at you warily in case you look like you’re in pain again

it’s not very subtle and you have to tell him to knock it off

Since he’s not the best with words (and honestly, he’s not sure what to say), Atsumu’s priority becomes your comfort

Once the both of you arrive, he gives you some space to clean yourself up while he texts Osamu if he can make some good food and drop it by your house

Osamu grumbles a lot but you receive a surprise delivery from him later, with a warning that it’s for you only and not to let ‘his idiot brother’ have any

You and Atsumu settle in on your bed next to each other and enjoy the food together while binge-watching your favourite show or just talking with each other

After you’re finished eating, Atsumu helps clear away the dishes and proceeds to snuggle under the covers with you

The both of you continue to talk, Atsumu’s arm around your shoulder as you rest your head on his chest and his fingers absent-mindedly drawing patterns on your side

Eventually, you doze off and that’s when Atsumu allows himself to truly look at you and think about how scared he was earlier

Atsumu softly kisses the top of your head and whispers an ‘i love you’ to your sleeping form, silently vowing to himself that he’ll be a more attentive and better boyfriend for you

miya osamu

Osamu is more laid back and chill, but that doesn’t mean he’s a bad boyfriend - he’s just usually more lowkey compared to Oikawa or Atsumu

Thought it doesn’t escape his attention when you meet up with him looking a little out of it

He asks “you good?” once and drops it when you tell him you’re fine, but will continuously give you suspicious looks at the telltale signs of discomfort

He’ll be subtly trying to help you as well, by suggesting less strenuous activities or saying he wants to get a drink and you should get one too

Once he notices your condition worsening, he’ll make you sit down and ask if you need to go to the nurse’s office (though, he’ll probably take you either way)

It takes him by surprise when you actually pass out. His eyes widen and he’s tense, but he immediately tries to wake you up by lightly tapping on your face while calling out your name

When he sees you not even stirring, he quickly decides to take you to the nurse’s office instead, ignoring all the curious stares as he walks briskly with you in his arms

He stands to the side and he watches the nurse perform the first aid, praying that you’ll come to soon

Not long after, he sees your eyelids flutter open groggily and your form shuffling a little on the bed, and Osamu releases a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding in

He slowly approaches you and doesn’t say anything to you at first, offering you a small comforting smile

If you try to apologise, he’ll shush you mid-sentence and roll his eyes, telling you there’s nothing to apologise for when you’re the one lying on the bed right now

But he’ll appreciate it if you tell him what exactly happened, all the while he’s gently holding your hand with his thumb tracing circles on it and he looks at you intently as you explain your situation

Osamu feels his heart twinge when he finds out you’ve been trying to hide your pain until you literally pass out and he’ll simply ask you not to do that in the future and that he can help you in whatever way you need, so please don’t hesitate to go to him for anything

After gathering your things, Osamu takes you home and insists on giving you a piggyback ride, partly to cheer you up and partly so you don’t tire yourself out further

When you both arrive, he immediately goes to the kitchen to cook something warm for you so you can regain your strength

He makes you sit on the table while he cooks your favourite dish so you both can continue talking and so he can keep a close eye on you

You easily fall back to your usual casual conversations, which pleases Osamu and dissipates his worries

Later, you both enjoy the delicious meal he prepared and afterwards, Osamu lets you choose whatever you want to do, preferably something fun to get both your minds off the previous incident

Osamu is satisfied as long as you’re happy and healthy, and he makes sure to tell you so as you’re both cuddling under the blankets and dozing off after a long day

hi anon, thank you for the request! sorry it’s a bit late, and i hope i understood your request correctly!

hope you enjoyed this❤

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vigilvntes · 3 years

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Bruises - Kylo Ren x Fem!Reader (Star Wars)

A/N: the way i had the opening of this in my drafts for ages and then at the big time of 2am i decided i wanted to rewrite the whole thing and get it published ;) i’m so much more motivated to write than usual when i should be doing uni work but oh well more kylo content for you guys <33 inbox is always open for requests while im actually writing so feel free to send and i hope you enjoy <33

Word count: 1900+

Warnings: mentions of minor injuries.

You walked out of the casino, wincing as the harsh evening winds hit your bare arms. The dress you wore did little to nothing to protect you from the weather, but the last thing you expected to be doing was leaving the venue in search of your date.

Canto Bight was never your favourite place. In your opinion, it was filled with sleazes, who only came to the city for three things: money, booze and sex. However, you were the daughter of a noble family and despite your wishes, your family often sent you along to the gatherings they were expected to attend, assuming that you would fit in with the crowd more than they would. They thought you’d enjoy the party, enjoy the alcohol, even the attention you often seemed to draw to yourself. How wrong they were.

However, there was always one saving grace to evenings like these: Commander Kylo Ren, of the First Order.

The two of you weren’t official, as much as you would like to be. You understood that he had work to do, with his grandfather leaving big boots to fill, he barely had time to sleep, let alone date. But for some strange reason, you were different. You caught his attention, and he made sure to make time for you, whether that meant attending parties and events with you, or simply going out of his way to visit you, if only for an hour.

Truthfully, you had spent many nights lying awake, tears in your eyes as you thought about your future, which you hoped would be with Kylo. Would he eventually ask you to be his girlfriend? Would he want to marry? To him, those questions would seem trivial, of no importance. He loved you, and would find ways to show you. But to you they meant a lot, and you were hoping for some kind of answers sometime soon.

You shook your head as you made your way over to the short wall which surrounded the casino, leaning on it, using your elbows to keep yourself propped up as your head rested in your hand. Your gaze flitted between the city and the body of water beyond, which seemed strangely calm despite the mean winds. For a moment, you forgot about the cold, forgot about why you had even come outside in the first place as you watched the waves slowly made their way towards the shore.

Your peace was soon interrupted.

A pair of hands snaked around your waist from behind and you let out a yelp, turning around quickly to face whoever had touched you, ready to defend yourself as much as you possibly could. Until you heard that familiar, smug chuckle come from behind a mask. You knew exactly who it was before you.

You rolled your eyes, “Way to make an entrance, Commander.” Despite your annoyance, you truly were happy to see him. Immediately you pulled him towards you and wrapped your arms around him, smiling into his chest as you felt him return the gesture.

Eventually, you pulled away and narrowed your eyes at the man. “Don’t think you’ve gotten away with it. I still have a bone to pick with you.”

Despite how hard he tried to hide it, you heard him sigh lightly underneath the mask and mumble a disgruntled, “Go on.”

“First of all you’re late.”

“(Y/N), I had bus-”

“I’m not finished.” If anyone else spoke to him that way, they would surely be punished. But not you. He allowed you to put him in his place, mainly because he couldn’t ever bring himself to snap at you, but also because he found you too cute when you were pissed off with him.

You took his silence as a go ahead to continue with your rant. “You’re late. Your clothes are ruined. Your helmet still has smoke coming from it. Do I need to continue? How did you even get here? Where have you been?”

“Like I said-”

“Take it off.” You demanded. You were sick of hearing the robotic voice coming from the mask already. You wanted to speak with Kylo, not Commander Ren.

An almost stunned silence washed over him and he replied to your demand with a quiet, “T-take it off?”

“The helmet, genius. Take it off.”

The two of you stared at each other for a moment, but eventually he reached his hands up and pulled the helmet from his head, revealing a mop of dark, curly hair, which had grown longer since the last time you saw one another, and just as you had expected, new cuts adorned his face, almost nicking the gauze of the scar he had attained during the destruction of Starkiller. But what really caught your attention was the black eye.

He simply stared at you, waiting patiently for you to react, prepared to accept anything you threw his way. But for a moment you said nothing, all you could do was sigh.

After a minute, you moved closer to him and reached up, your fingers tracing the scar on his cheek, offering him a small, sympathetic smile, “If I remember correctly, the invitation said black tie, not black eye, Ren.”

Kylo couldn’t help but smile at your comment, and you were glad to hear his deep voice, which you had missed so dearly, reply with, “I must have read it wrong.”

“You wanna tell me how Kylo Ren, Commander of the First Order, has ended up with a black eye?”

His smile dropped at your inquiry to know more about his injuries, and your smile followed suit as you realised exactly what had happened. “It was them, wasn’t it?” You asked.

“Who?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, Kylo. It was the Scavenger and her Resistance friends, wasn’t it?”

His silence said everything. He pushed his tongue into his cheek and looked away from you, almost embarrassed. And truthfully, it was quite embarrassing. He was Commander Ren. He was feared. Respected. Yet he couldn’t even manage to capture and kill a scavenger girl.

You turned away from him, moving your attention back to the sea, crossing your arms. He knew you were pissed and he’d have to talk his way out of this one somehow. His silence simply wasn’t enough.

“(Y/N). I’m sorry that I turned up so late.” You didn’t even move, let alone reply, so he continued. “And I’m sorry about the state of my attire.” No reply. “And.... I would also like to apologise for the state of my face.” He wasn’t usually one to apologise to anyone, but a genuine apology from him was the only way for him to bounce back from his fuck up’s.

You tried your hardest to keep your composure, but one of the most powerful men in the galaxy apologising for his face was enough to bring a smile to anyone’s lips. “I guess she got you good, huh?”

He came to your side after hearing your joking retort, “You could say that.” He found himself thinking this too often, but if anyone else had mocked him this way he most likely would have destroyed a wall or two. He knew you would never think of him as a failure, or an embarrassment, as many probably did. Your light-hearted jabs at him were mainly for your own comfort. To make light of any bad situation he often found himself in.

You sighed, leaning your head onto his shoulder. You hated how quickly you could melt back into him again, but you couldn’t waste any more precious time you had together being angry or upset, “I just worry about you,”

“I know. But you shouldn’t,” He mumbled. “I can be reckless. I throw myself into danger. But I also come back fine.” He knew to you those words would probably mean nothing, but he was trying his best to comfort you.

“You make it so hard not to worry. I mean, this war you’ve got going on... It’s so much bigger than you, or me, or the Scavenger girl. And truthfully, I’m scared. Terrified, actually. For you, for me. For my family. For everyone, really.” That was the first time you had ever admitted your fears to him. There was no way he’d give up his title, give up the First Order, but you hoped he’d provide you with a little reassurance that things would be okay.

His grip on you tightened, not so much that it would hurt you, but enough to know that he felt every word you spoke. “You know I wouldn’t ever let anything happen to you, or anyone you care about. I care about you too much to hurt you like that.” He stepped in front of you and knelt down, taking both of your hands. “As for everything else, I can’t make any promises. No one, not even the Supreme Leader knows what’s coming next. All I can ask is that you trust me enough to make the right choices.”

His words, for some reason you couldn’t quite decipher, felt like they held some hidden meaning. Like he was planning something drastic, or he knew something drastic would happen in the future. But you took these thoughts with a grain of salt, choosing not to press him any further, and instead choosing to trust him, as he asked of you. Squeezing his hand lightly, you offered him a small smile, “Of course I trust you. I’d trust you with my life. Just... Do what’s right. And if it doesn’t feel or seem right then... Don’t.”

He nodded and stood up slowly, “Of course.” After a few moments of peaceful silence shared between the two of you, as you processed each other’s words, he broke it. “You’re going to have my head the next time I see you, I know, but I have to go.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, “You have to go? As in you’re not staying?”

“I can’t tell you how sorry I am, and I know I said I’d join you for the night but given how today went, I’m not even supposed to be here.”

“Oh, and where exactly are you supposed to be?” You knew the answer already, and you knew he’d probably be in some deep trouble, you just wanted him to say it himself.

Once again, he pushed his tongue into his cheek before replying with, “The Supremacy.”

Bingo, you thought to yourself. The Supremacy. The Supreme Leader’s ship. And Kylo chose to go out of his way to see you first, prioritising you over his master. You couldn’t help but feel flattered, even though your plans for the night had been ruined. You gave him a small smile, “I suppose because you came to me first, and because I’m almost certain the Supreme Leader is gonna give you a harder time than I ever could, I’ll let this one go,”

“I appreciate that.” He leant down and pressed his lips to yours gently, and when he pulled away, he left another on your forehead. “I’ll see you soon, I promise.”

As you watched him walk away, towards the steps, you wished you could go with him. Be by his side, be able to see him everyday. Even though you knew that wasn’t exactly possible at the moment, you couldn’t help but ask. Before you could stop yourself, you had called his name, and he, already a few metres away, had turned to look back at you.

He knew what you were going to ask, and this time his answer was more hopeful than it had been before. He couldn’t tell you what was to come, but he hoped it would work for the both of you.

“Kylo I-.... One day, will you take me with you?”

He nodded his head slowly, and spoke only one word, “Soon.”

#kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren fic #kylo ren fanfiction #kylo x you #kylo x reader #ben solo #kylo ren imagines #kylo ren imagine #kylo imagine #star wars imagine #star wars #the last jedi #the force awakens #rise of skywalker #star wars x reader #kylo

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staycult · 3 years

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highschool!jisung as your boyfriend

pairing — gender neutral reader x jisung

genre — fluff / bullet scenario / friends to lovers

word count — 1.6k

enjoy!

u and jisung had been friends for quite some time now

ever since highschool started probably

u guys were in the same friend group

you were always with him during lunch

and u guys go home together bcs ure practically neighbors

“[y/n]! smile!” he said as he pulled out his favored polaroid camera

as you were about to turn your head around you heard a loud click, coming from the camera

a flash of light blinded your eyes

so you tried to cover it

“hey! i wasnt ready!” you pouted, giving jisung a light slap in the arm

he stuck his tongue out to mock your reaction and pulled out the film from his camera

“you look ugly” jisung snorted, fanning the film

“shut up and start moving!” you rolled your eyes and grabbed his hand to make him walk faster

bcs guys were about to go home

“do you want to stop by at the park first?” jisung offered

ofc u cant resist him

his presence always make u feel at ease

“buy me ice cream then let’s go” you bargained, earning an eye roll from him

“Two ice cream cones please!” you requested, giving the money to the cashier. you tapped your finger on the cold surface while your other armed propped your chin. jisung on the other hand was shuffling through his notebook filled with polaroid pictures that he took with your friends.

“stop staring at my pictures, ji” you laughed while grabbing your cone from the man in front of you and giving the other cone to jisung. “keep staring and you’ll fall for me” you added as you licked your ice cream. he clicked his teeth, “ew, you wish”

both you and jisung walked around the park, still in your school uniforms. the park is the place where you and your friends hang around when you guys have time. the slide and the swing are your most favorite part.

you sat down in the swing and tapped the other seat to motion jisung to sit down as well. “look, the sun is setting!” you pointed as you finished your cone. you looked over to jisung who was his camera pointed at you for the nth time. but this time, you managed to strike a pose in front of his polaroid camera. his cheeks can be seen from behind, obviously smiling at the sight.

days went by

you and jisung had been hanging out in the park swing almost every day

just the both of you

watching the sunsets and taking pictures

you noticed that he only takes random pictures of you but when youre with friends, they need to ask first before jisung would take a picture

he claims that your face is funnier with stolen shots

ofc u believed him

he is your best friend after all

the school year is about to end

and your music and arts teacher is talking about your final project

which was to write a song or poem, draw a portrait or make a poster

with a special meaning behind it

you almost ripped your hair out of frustration when you tried to compose a song or draw

so u went for a simple poster

you and your friends were comparing your final outputs in the cafeteria

“come on, show us yours!” your friends encouraged you

“ahh, it’s really ugly im not even good at these kinds of shit!” you cursed, showing it to them anyway

“seriously? it’s good! youre like jisung. god, both of you say you did bad but it’s not!” you friend said while eyeing your poster

“really? jisung i want to see yours!” you said while grabbing some of your friend’s food

“no” he said, sticking a tongue out to mock you

“why not?” you replied while pouting

both of you bickered for atleast 3 minutes

saying lots of ‘no’s’ and ‘why not’s’

he had enough of your shit

and pulled you out of the cafeteria

holding his notebook, backpack and a ukelele

jisung was grabbing you by your wrist until you arrived at the school’s rooftop. you didn't have the time to respond at his sudden action.

“ouch! what was that about?” you said once he lets go of your wrist. “you want me to show you my output right? well here it is. listen.”

you were taken aback by his words, did he really get annoyed by your previous bickering? and why are we on a roof top anyway????

jisung grabbed his ukelele and opened his notebook, which was filled with polaroid pictures of you that was taken over the school year and years before that.

“it’s called hello stranger,” he spoke and started strumming on his ukelele

“The moment I felt like our eyes met

my body moved all on its own

Movin’, movin’, movin’, movin’, movin’

The closer we get the more I think

about what it is I’m feeling

My mind is filled with question marks

I can’t see anyone

around us anymore, you’re just growing more clear

Everything on this road

is blurred and faded out except for you

I’m filled with nothing but curiosity about who you may be

It’s like I’m approaching you drawn by something I can’t even know

I won’t beat around the bush, my subconscious is pushing straight forward

having me walk as it pleases without a single thought

Ah, a new wind is blowing

Where could it have come from?

It’s strange, but it’s not cold

Before I know it my feet are moving, following the wind

I take my hands out of my pockets

Hello Stranger, I keep being drawn to you

Growing closer

to you without a single thought

I’m curious, more and more and more as time passes,

why am I like this? Who are you to do this to me?

Stranger

Nana nanana nana

Closer

Hello Stranger, who are you to do this to me?

I can see in you the things that I myself am lacking

I try yelling out to you the things I had just yelled into empty space

The things I didn’t have, that I was missing before I met you,

all of these feelings, every moment

my mind is filled with exclamation points

I can’t see anyone

around us anymore, you’re just growing more clear

Everything on this road

is blurred and faded out except for you

Something’s different about you, but I’m not sure what

I think the light approaching me now must be you

Even if I look away I can still see your afterimage,

you never leave my sight, who are you to do this to me?

Ah, my feet are moving, following this new wind

I take my hands out of my pockets

Hello Stranger, I keep being drawn to you

Growing closer

to you without a single thought

I’m curious, more and more and more as time passes,

why am I like this? Who are you to do this to me?

i love you”

it’s been weeks since you and jisung last spoke and since his sudden confession

you were about to tell him how you felt, too

how he makes you happy these past few days

to the point where you were falling for him too

but he ignored you

was it because he felt awkward?

or scared?

confusion was taking over you

and you know damn well youre gonna have to take measures into your own hands

so you came up with a plan to atleast get him to talk to you

“come on! just say i wont be there” you begged your friend. “fine. so roof top it is?” you squealed and gave your friend a hug. plan was to make your friends invite jisung at the same place he confessed on only to see youre the only one there

you grabbed your backpack since you had a vacant class and went to the rooftop to prepare. you knew jisung had a vacant class too, so you were hopeful he’s going to drop by.

“hi, i like you too” you practiced “no, too awkward” you ran your hands through your hair in frustration. “hey jisung! will you vincent van gogh out with me?” you repeated with hand motions this time. “god no” you mentally slapped yourself because of the cringe

“jisung, i like yo-” you repeated. you felt someone hug you from behind, “you do?” his husky voice sent shivers down to your spine as he hugged you even tighter.

“i-i do” you admitted, removing his arms so you can face him properly. “i really really do, i cant stand you not talking to me.” you burried your head to the crook of his neck.

“im sorry, baby. i didnt know how to handle rejection yet” he let out a low laugh, earning a laugh from you too. he snaked his arms around you and swayed you back and forth. humming the tune of the song he composed.

“youre mine now, are you?” he spoke, kissing your forehead as you gave him a nod.

bf jisung would mean

A VERY PLAYFUL RELATIONSHIP

SERIOUSLY

the confession may be soft and cuddly

but after like 2 days

yall are like best friends again

but with a mixture of sweetness

things never really changed

but you were still glad

love letters and songs !!!!!

lots and lots of kisses

cheek, forehead, chin, shoulder kisses

you name it

he would gently cup your face while doing so

he likes teasing you

but u tease him back

ends up with him being all pouty

will help u out with homework

ice cream and park swing dates

would literally take polaroid pictures of both of you

the ones he took before yall got together is displayed in his room

on the back of his phone

and the rest, he keeps it in his notebook

which was filled with songs about you

will sing you to sleep

will hold your hand literally every where

“baby, im the luckiest to have you”

author's note —

just imagine it's the slow version of hello stranger ok ALSO i want jisung to be my bf like ??

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ninak803 · 3 years

Text

Elitist Nightmares

Aaand I finished a new chapter! Yeeei!

@whataboutmyfries thank you, thank you, thank you ❤️❤️

Characters belong to @lumosinlove

Psssst @sunflowerfox87 a new chapter!

Please read tags for CW!!

Chapter 7

Remus

The last days went by in a blur. Remus and Leo organized everything that needed to be organized, like a needle to draw blood and bleach to clean up the mess he was going to make.

Now they were both sitting in the car and Remus went through the plan step by step, so he won't forget anything.

“Okay, so I'll be waiting here for you.” Leo said, watching Remus carefully.

He felt Remus' tension; he was good at reading people, Remus had to admit. Working with him wasn't bad after all.

“Yeah. If I'm not back in two hours, something's gone wrong; get the hell out of here and contact O'Hara and Tremblay, they know what to do. Okay?”

Leo nodded.

“Good luck.” he said as Remus left the car.

For the third time, he sneaked through the Black’s mansion, that was two times more than he initially had intended, it had never happened to him before, but plans changed. Obviously.

When he opened Sirius' bedroom door, he was sitting on his bed, awake this time. He looked at Remus, whose heart beat faster out of nervousness. He closed the door behind him quietly and walked over to the other man.

“I thought you might have forgotten me.” Sirius said, his voice a bit teasing.

Remus rolled his eyes. This guy really was something, talking to his assassin like that.

“No, I did not.” Remus said and placed the things he had brought with him on the bed.

Sirius moved closer to get a better look.

“What's that for?” he asked and pointed at the blood drawing kit.

Remus raised his eyebrows.

“How did you think, I would get your blood without actually hurting you?”

Sirius looked at him with horror, his eyes wide.

“I… I didn’t think about it.” his voice was just a whisper.

Remus grinned at him a bit.

“You're afraid of needles.” he stated.

The other one shook his head.

“No, of course not. I just… don't like them, with their pointy ends and all.”

Now Remus had to laugh, Sirius was cute when he was like that.

“Don't worry, I know what I'm doing, I've done this before.”

And this wasn't exactly a lie, he had trained on how to draw blood with Leo for the last couple of days. The poor boy's arm was covered with bruises from it.

“Why do you know how to do this?”

Remus just shrugged vaguely and held out his arm.

“Give me your arm, please.”

He placed the tourniquet around Sirius' arm, took a pad, then disinfected his arm.

Sirius stared at him, following every move he made with watchful eyes.

“Okay… Please lean back and look at the ceiling.” Remus instructed.

He waited until Sirius did as he was told, then took the needle in his hand and looked at his arm to find the vein.

Sirius' breaths were rather fast and Remus looked at him.

“Tell me something. Something I don't know. Something good.”

Sirius looked into his eyes for a moment, then back at the ceiling when he started talking.

“Uhm… When we were still kids, Regulus and I had this place down the road. There is a small forest, I don't know if you know. It's really not large, but it's very nice and not many people go there. Well, it was pretty empty, I don't know what it's like now. I haven't been there in years… So we would go there when our parents were… When they were shit again. We would just run away and hide for a while, pretend that everything we see is ours. We built small hideouts with the branches and moss, had fights with sticks which we pretended were swords and we were some sort of knights…” he smiled at the thought.

“And everything was well for a moment.”

Sirius looked at Remus, then at his arm in surprise. He hadn't noticed the needle at all.

Remus smiled at him genuinely.

“That sounds like a good memory.” he agreed.

They were silent for a moment, Remus watching Sirius and Sirius watching his blood and Remus, smiling shyly at him.

“Please tell me when you start feeling dizzy.” he told Sirius, who nodded.

Sirius closed his eyes. His breathing was even, just a bit too fast, maybe.

“You wanna tell me something else?” Remus asked him.

A smile appeared on Sirius' face, his eyes still closed. Remus liked this smile. It was an honest one, a happy one.

“Hm, let me think for a moment.”

He bit his lip in concentration.

“Oh, okay, I have one. We have this lake in our garden, you probably know that, and in winter when it was frozen, Regulus and I went out there to skate. It was in the middle of the night, so our parents wouldn’t notice us. It was so freaking cold. Afterwards we made hot chocolate to get warm again.”

Sirius sighed.

“I miss those days… When he was still just my little brother and not my parents' meeple. Also, I’m feeling dizzy now.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah, give me a moment.” Remus said.

He fumbled with the needle and pulled it away, then placed a band aid on Sirius' arm.

Remus reached for his bag, took some chocolate out and handed it to him.

“Eat. You'll feel better.”

He waited for a while and watched Sirius eat, then Remus got up and walked into the middle of the room. He spun around several times to look at the room to find the right spot for the crime scene, then he went to the wall where he first encountered him.

This would do.

He turned around to Sirius, who was watching him, Remus swallowed.

“Can you come over here for a second?”

Sirius walked to him and Remus pushed him against the wall, gently this time. He took his knife out and held it to his throat, without any pressure though, he didn't want to hurt him.

“This feels familiar.” Sirius said with a grin on his face.

“Yeah, I need to see how tall you are to prepare…” Remus trailed off.

“Do whatever you have to do.” Sirius shrugged.

After a moment, he let go of him again and started to prepare the fake crime scene. This took him a good while, Sirius watched him from his bed again. When he was pleased with the mess he made, he started scrubbing everything with the bleach he'd brought.

Sirius was standing next to him when he was done.

“You've missed a spot here.”

Remus nodded.

“I know, I did that on purpose. So they see you didn't just run away.”

Sirius looked at him.

“Smart.”

Remus grinned.

“Thanks.”

He cleaned himself up afterwards, then went back to Sirius, who looked sad.

“Come on. We have to go now. Leave your phone here.”

And they left the Black mansion together.

Sirius

They went to a white car, a blonde guy sitting in it. Remus opened the door for him and he got inside.

“Uh… Hi.” Sirius said to the blonde.

“Hi. Im Leo. Nice to meet you.”

“Yeah. You too, I guess?”

They drove through the whole town, then parked in front of a small, rundown building.

“Welcome to your new home for the next couple of weeks.” Amber Eyes announced.

Sirius looked at it sceptically, but followed them up to the flat.

Inside it was slightly better. It wasn't the best flat he had ever seen, but at least it was clean.

So this was where he would stay now… Well, it could be worse, right? He could still be with his parents.

Remus looked at him, watching every step he made, so Sirius smiled at him.

“It's yours? Looks… nice.”

Remus laughed, he had detected the lie.

“Come on, I’ll show you where the bedroom is. You need some sleep.”

Sirius followed him into the bedroom. It was small; the bed fitted in there just so, a small wardrobe next to it.

“Take anything you need out of my wardrobe. My clothes might be too large for you, but it'll do for now. I'm in the living room, if you need anything. The bathroom is right next to the bedroom.”

Sirius nodded and Remus left him alone.

He sat down on the bed, moving his fingers over the blanket, then laid down fully clothed.

How was he supposed to sleep now? He had just faked his death and was now lying in the bed of a stranger, of someone who actually wanted to kill him, and he should just trust him now? No way.

His thoughts wandered to his brother and the fight they had only a couple of hours ago. He wished he could talk to him now, tell him he was sorry, tell him what was going to happen. When Regulus finds him gone, he would assume that he needed a day away from their family, like he did sometimes. But when he wouldn't come back in the afternoon, Regulus would know something was wrong. He will check his bedroom, find his phone and maybe the small blood spot, which Remus had left on the floor. The thought alone made Sirius heart hurt for his brother. Why did he have to do this to him?

He didn't care about his parents or their feelings, but he did care about his brother. Regulus was going to feel so damn awful.

Sirius swallowed hard and wiped away the tears. He would see his brother again. He knew it, but he was still sorry.

He closed his eyes, the touch of the soft blanket soothing him a little. He noticed a smell. He recognized it as Remus'; he remembered it clearly from the first day they had met. It shouldn't surprise him, it was his bedroom after all.

He snuggled deeper into the blanket and fell asleep despite everything.

---

Sirius startled awake. He was sweaty and his heart beat fast, because of the nightmare he just had. He swallowed, sat up and looked around. At first he didn't recognize the room he was in, but after a moment the events of the day sank in and he slowly calmed down again.

His parents weren't even close.

With an almost normal heartbeat, he got up and walked into the kitchen to get some water. A movement on the couch made Sirius stop. Remus was sleeping there, the blanket was thrown carelessly to the floor; he was sweating and his face looked painful, afraid.

So Sirius wasn't the only one with nightmares.

He walked over to the couch and sat down next to Remus, touching him gently on the shoulder to wake him up, and Remus shot upright immediately, his hands closing around Sirius neck.

Sirius held his hands up in defense, to show him he was unarmed and after a moment Remus let go of him, his eyes still scared.

“Fuck. Do you want to get yourself killed? Do not wake me up. Damn it.” he said, his voice hoarse.

Remus moved a hand through his hair, and Sirius watched him.

“You had a nightmare.” he said.

Remus shook his head.

“No, I didn't.”

“I get them too. I just had one.” he said silently.

Remus took a deep breath, then looked at Sirius with soft eyes and a small smile.

“You wanna talk about it?”

But Sirius shook his head.

“Neither do I.” Remus said, then got up from the couch.

“I don't think I can fall asleep now. You almost scared me to death.” he said.

Sirius had to laugh.

“Thanks for waking me up though…” Remus said, barely audible, then he cleared his throat and continued:

“I get myself some tea. Do you want one too? We could watch a movie or something… I mean, if you don't want to sleep again. If not, I promise you won't hear me, I won't wake you up.”

Sirius got up too.

“Tea and a movie sounds good, actually. I don't want to sleep at the moment, so… Some company would be nice, I guess? If you don't mind me…”

“Yeah, no, I don't mind.”

They stood next to each other awkwardly for a moment, then Remus left and went into the kitchen to make them some tea.

Finn

Logan was standing in the kitchen, talking on his phone apparently. Finn sat in the living room and could hear him talking to someone. He looked at Logan when the other boy came into sight again.

“I just got a call from Remus. He did it, he eliminated Black.” he sounded awestruck.

“Oh, wow.”

Logan nodded.

“Yeah. You remember this boy he took with him when he paid us a visit?”

Now it was Finn's turn to nod.

Of course he remembered Leo, he thought about him every day to be honest.

“Well, he is going to work with us now.”

Finn sat up straighter.

Well, that was some good news, right? He had wanted to see him again the moment he walked through their door with Remus. But now he had to work with him and with Logan. One boy he was in love with for years now and another one he was falling for already. Those weren’t the best circumstances. How was he supposed to stay sane?

Finn felt Logan's eyes on him, so he looked at him and smiled.

“Sounds good to me. He still needs to learn, right? We can show him a thing or two.”

Logan nodded.

“Yeah, that's actually what Remus just said to me. Leo will be here tomorrow morning at 6:30.”

Okay, so Finn had another night to think on how to handle this whole situation, not that he had many options.

“The newspapers did not cover his death yet, did they?” he asked to change the subject.

“No, it's just been a couple of hours.”

Finn nodded.

“Okay, well… We should check on Regulus and see how the security arrangements for him have changed. I guess things will be more complicated for us now.”

He got up and walked over to where Logan was standing, looking at him.

“Ouais…” he said.

Something was occupying him, Finn could see it on his face, his posture.

“Are you okay, Tremz?”

Logan looked him straight in the eye, Finn's breath hitched a second, but then Logan smiled at him and moved away.

“Yeah. Im okay. I'm just excited, I think. Everything is going to change now, isn't it?”

Finn nodded.

“That's why we're doing this. Come on, then.” he placed his hand on Logan's shoulder shortly as they left their apartment.

Finn knew Logan hadn’t told him the truth, but he also knew Logan; if he cornered him now, he would just shut down completely, so Finn let it go.

---

The next morning Finn was running up and down in his room, waiting for the doorbell to finally ring. He checked his watch for the hundredth time. 6:25 am.

He sighed and sat down on his bed. He didn't even know why he was so nervous. Well, no, he knew, but it still was stupid and annoying.

A moment later the bell finally rang, and Finn jumped up. He almost ran to the door and crashed into Logan, who already had his hand on the handle.

“Woah, slow down Harzy.” he said and opened the door.

And there he stood: Leo, tall, blonde, with friendly blue eyes and a dimpled smile on his face.

Finn's heart melted on the spot.

#wolfstar #harry potter #remus john lupin #remus lupin #remus x sirius #sirius black #sirius orion black #james potter #muggle au #lily evans #regulus black #assassin remus #tw needles #tw mention of blood #cw faking a crime scene #cw faking death #oknutzy

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woolieshubris · 3 years

Text

OK SO IM GOING TO WRITE SOME BACKSTORY THEN CLICK THE CUT TO SEE THE ORIGINAL ARTICLE WITH NO EDITING.

OK SO BASICALLY. At this point in the series, (season 1 had been out and season 2 kept getting hints dropped) every main love square ship had gotten their "scene", except for marichat. Marichat, argueably, was the (and still is) most popular ship on the show. Suddenly a still frame (or concept art?) was released of marinette and chat sitting on her balcony together looking out at the stars. This was quickly dubbed the "balcony scene" and many many many ficwriters quickly made fics of the scene, people made art for it, and people were overall, generally super f/cking hyped for it. Then, glaciator dropped, and reviews were... mixed to say the least. So here, presented in its full, unedited glory, was my hot 2016 take.

enjoy.

Yes. I will be talking about THIS episode. The episode so anticipated by shippers everywhere. The episode that was supposed to finally give marichat shippers a chance, and we ended up with this.

I hate this episode, for many many reasons, but do not worry. The balcony scene isn't one of them.

Here is my summary, (which is very long, so if you would rather just rewatch the episode feel free to do so)

The episode starts out, with chat asking lady out. Nothing out of the ordinary. She says no, but chat takes it as a maybe. (Which is already really stupid, but I'll let it slide)

After they wrap up the escapade, Mari goes to Andre the sweetheart ice cream man, and becomes disappointed when Adrian says he can't go. (Which is not his fault, so I'm letting this slide as well)

Mari feels like a third wheel and declines Andres ice cream because she's heartbroken? (You can get ice cream any day? And it wasn't Adrian's choice either, she should know this by now?)

Andres feelings are hurt.

Cut to chat, who is waiting for ladybug, and lady isn't showing.

Cut to hawkmoth who akumatizes Andre, and then cut to mari, who feels bad about the who ordeal.

Chat blows out candles angstily (even though lady clearly said no, AND thought he was joking) and decides that lady doesn't love him.

Mari is sad about Adrian and goes out to her balcony, balcony scene happens and chat brings Mari to his date he had planned.

Mari is surprised that chat hadn't been joking this entire time (ehh it makes enough sense) and now she feels double as bad.

Andre attacks.

Chat leaps into action and ladybug comes right after. Chat is angsty, and ladybug doesn't show any kind of remorse (what?)

She says sorry, but with no meaning. (maybe bad voice acting, so I'll let this one slide as well) chat is still mad. They soon make the discovery that he doesn't hurt couples, so lady asks if they could pretend to be a couple and chat says no. (Which makes sense) then lady like 1 minute later asks the same thing and chat says yes. (What why would he say yes? ) And they pretend to be a couple but it doesn't do anything to help them?

It helps them escape but they could have done that without pretending to be a couple? Anyways, they save the day and then lady comes to go see chats surprise. He offers her a rose, and lady says she only wants to be friends.

(Chat should have still been mad at her, since she never even said sorry properly, I mean I know I would have,) and chat smiles and says that's fine, then he blasts off.

We follow chat to his room and he's smiling in his bed. Plagg tells him it's ok to be heartbroken, and that a little cheese can help, but Adrian says he isn't heartbroken, and that he's glad she sees him as a friend.

Oof that summary was longer than expected, but it was hopefully shorter than the episode.

Ok, so now that we are all refreshed, I will now list m problems with the episode, in order to make it easier to fix.

First problem, Marinette is heartbroken over the ice cream.

We can easily fix this by making it a special day, like maybe it's a blue moon that night, and Mari wanted to see it with Adrien. It could be the same for Chat with Ladybug, they wanted to see the blue moon together. He takes the, "maybe, I have plans" as a, "sure I'll make it a plan" because he really really wants it to happen, maybe even have plagg mention it, say something along the lines of, "She said she had plans," and Adrien says, "She said maybe!" (I know they already say this, but it isn't portrayed very well in my opinion.

Problem two, Ladybug never says sorry, and chat doesn't care.

Honestly, throughout the entire episode, I was waiting for ladybug to give chat a hug and just say sorry properly. Throughout most of the episode, chat looks on the brink of tears, and lady acts like she can't see it, and chat forgives her almost instantly. It would have been much more interesting to see a chat begrudgingly doing as he's told, just to save Paris, and go home.

Problem 3, Chat isn't heartbroken.

As stated in the show, we don't ever see the sensitive side of chat noir, and the show seems to want to avoid the subject. Chat got friendzoned. He says he's happy to be lady's friend, but he always was, from the start. All of this buildup, only for it to be knocked down in a single episode. Adrien should have been devistated, but then again, this is one of those "reset" type of shows, where everything must resolve before the credits roll, and it becomes very obvious with the awkward transition. You can tell that they were planning to have him heartbroken in bed, mad at ladybug, but someone said, "kids don't want meaningful character exploration, they want happy endings!"

Ok, so now I write my script doctored version of this episode. Warning, it's pretty long.

Ladybug and chat are talking it up as they help the people get off the bus.

"So, you heard about the blue moon tonight chat noir?" Lady asks.

"Yeah, when there is a full moon twice in a month? It's very rare!" Chat says, explaining to all the kids what a blue moon is. "Well, m'lady, can you visit me tonight? You know, to see it together?" Lady shakes her head.

"I have plans," lady thinks it over for a bit however, "but maybe I can come." Chat looks at the time on his baton, and realizes he has to go back home, his piano practice is almost over.

"Gotta go, see you later ladybug!" He says, as he runs off. Lady goes home and realizes that's she's almost late to go meet her friends. She runs out the door and we cut to Adrien, who is texting Nino.

"Sorry nino, father said I can't come" he's talking as he's texting. Plagg flies by and says, "you didn't even ask your dad, how do you know he'd say no?"

Adrien responds, "I have plans with ladybug remember?"

Plagg rolls his eyes. "She said that she had plans."

Adrien looks at plagg and says, "she said maybe."

We cut away from Adrien and we now see a heartbroken Mari.

"It's the blue moon, the most magical night of all, and we were going to eat Andre's ice cream, the most magical ice cream in Paris!" Mari sighs sadly as she sits down on a bench. Nino shows her the text and says, "It's never adrien's fault, so don't blaim him for not being able to show."

"I know, I know." Mari stands up and they all start looking for the ice cream cart.

Cut to chat, who's has just finished setting up the date.

"I really hope she comes." Chat says this with certainty, showing his trust in ladybug. Without having to OUTRIGHT SAY IT. (cough cough episode 12 cough cough)

Cut back to mari, who is exhausted from the chase to find the cart, and salty about Adrien. She sees alya and nino holding hands as they get their ice cream, and looks at the ground while she sits on the bench, not wanting to see it. "We can never be like them" She says, salty. Andre notices this and gives her the ice cream.

"Perfect, just like your love!" Andre says, with a smile. Mari's twisted salty head decides that she doesn't love him, because she and adrien will never be like alya and nino, so when Andre is passing the icecream to Mari, she doesn't grab it, and it falls to the ground.

"I don't love anyone." Mari says, as she stares at the fallen ice cream. Under her breath Mari says, "because no body loves me." Mari looks up at Andre who looks very sad. She realizes what happened and runs to her house. Cut to chat, who is doing the candle thing he did before because that was a really good and powerful scene and I don't want to change it. Start balcony scene, and everything is the same up until the "reveal" of the surprise to ladybug. This time, she hugs him, and you see chats eyes tearing up as she friendzones him. He lets go of the hug prematurely, and smiles, putting the rose in lady's hair. He goes back home and no more cuts to chat or Adrien so we can let the viewers draw their own conclusions. Everything is the same up until when Adrien gets the ice cream. This time, Adrien looks a little happy/sad when Andre prepares him the ladybug ice cream. Happy because he knows he still loves ladybug, but also sad because he knows she will never love him in the same way.

I'm sorry for making you read that entire thing. If you made it through, please, tell me below, which version you like more, and I really want to see your criticism of both. I'd love to have a conversation about it.

#wooliechats #long post

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honsoolie · 4 years

Text

don’t rush | 02

pairing: Yoongi/reader

genre: slight enemies to lovers, college au, fluff, eventual smut, classical pianist!yoongi, violinist!reader, they’re both actually really into each other but won’t admit it

warnings (for this chapter only): mentions of stage fright/performance anxiety, swearing, sexual references, slight angst, dad jokes :|

words: 6k

rating: +18

summary: You know, when Min Yoongi’s face isn’t screwed into an accusatory scowl, he looks exactly like the kind of guy you’d have no trouble falling in love with. Or, the conservatory au where Yoongi helps you get over your stage fright. In more ways than one.

a/n: didn’t plan to take this long for an update, life gets in the way, you know the drill. read 01 here and as always, this is crossposted to ao3 :)

When you get inside, the warmth welcomes you in. You’re not quite sure if it’s from the heating in the hallway or how Yoongi’s eyes had shone in the moonlight. You lean against the inner door frame, a happy smile tugging at the corners of your mouth, legs a little weak in the knee. You feel light-headed, maybe from being up late, maybe from your exhausting day, maybe from the lingering remnants of Yoongi’s cologne.

Did that really just happen? Did he really just ask for your number? Was this all a dream?

The euphoria is short-lasting, however. You still have some assignments waiting for you, and only a couple hours left until your morning classes. The tiredness never lets up, and your limbs heavy again as you make your way inside the lobby of your dorm.

Unknown number (2:47am): hi this is yoongi

Unknown number (2:47am): did you get inside ok?

You (2:48am): yeah

You (2:48am): did u?

Yoongi (2:50am): im walking back now

Yoongi (2:50am): you should sleep soon ://

You (2:51am): I still have hw :(

You (2:51am): text me when ur back inside too

Yoongi (2:53am): lmaoo is it counterpoint hw

Yoongi (2:54am): it’s so sweet that you care for my safety ;(

You (2:54am): yes sadly

You (2:55am): ofc I care, we can’t have our amazing star pianist get hurt

Yoongi (2:55am): im home now

Yoongi (2:58am): you have a thing for praise, don’t you

Even though you can’t see him, you splutter alone in your room, roommate fast asleep. There is no way that means what you think it means.

You (3:00am): idk where u got that from

You (3:03am): maybe i do, you’ll have to find out

Yoongi (3:04am): I would, but you have to finish your analysis worksheet :/

You (3:15am): ugh, fuck it

You (3:15am): im going to sleep

You (3:15am): ill just wake up early tomorrow to finish it before class

Yoongi (3:16am): what? No goodnight? >:(

Yoongi (3:17am): some manners you have

Yoongi (3:17am): what a rude girl

You (3:18am): aw have i been bad?

You (3:18am): I’m sooooo sorry

You (3:19am): gn

The minutes tick by, and you grow more indignant than you should. Is he serious?

Who doesn’t say goodnight back? Maybe you scared him off. Maybe all this “flirtatious” banter was just how Yoongi talked to his friends. How would you know? You don’t know anything about him.

The same insidious doubt creeps back in. Maybe this is all a game to him. Maybe he just wanted to introduce himself to another music student in the department, you all were supposed to know each other anyway. Maybe, worst of all, he had really only meant to wake you up in the music building as a simple courtesy, no intent behind it. You groan as you sink into your bed, cradling your head in your hands.

You (3:27am): some hypocrite you are

Yoongi (3:30am): I was in the showerrr relax

Yoongi (3:31am): hm you have been bad

Yoongi (3:33am): maybe I should punish you

You (3:29am): u wish

You (3:30am): but goodnight for real, we have class in five hours :”(

Yoongi (3:31am): goodnight

Yoongi (3:31am): save me a spot next to you

You were in the world’s smallest big crisis.

Was Yoongi actually serious when he asked you to save a seat? Or were you just indulging in wishful thinking? Was he flirting with you last night? And if he was, what are you supposed to do now?

Whatever he meant, you would have to face him now.

The endless litany of maybes and what-ifs grows louder in your head, even louder than last night during your text correspondence with him.You elect to use your backpack to save the seat next to you as class time draws nearer, chiding yourself for overthinking something so casual, but it does nothing to soothe your existential anxiety.

“Thanks for saving me a spot, I’m so glad you remembered.” A voice brings you out of your reverie. It takes a moment to register who it is at first. Your eyes meet the traditional college garb first, sweatpants and an overwashed fundraising t-shirt, then the half-tamed cowlick, that ever-present cup of coffee. Your breath catches in your throat, breathtaking despite the casual circumstances. It’s just another class lecture, you chastise yourself, but your gut twists nonetheless.

Seeing Yoongi in such close quarters is still an adjustment for you, his presence (or even the thought of being close to him) a shock to your body. You had spent so much time languishing after him that even now, it still feels like waking up into a dream.

You clear your throat, stalling, “Yeah, putting my backpack in the seat next to mine was sooo hard. You should compensate me for my labor.”

You try to put on the flirty smile that you were wearing last night, but it feels like a grimace. God, you are way too nervous for this.

You realize you’ll never get tired of the way he laughs at your shitty jokes, the way his shoulders shake and eyes crinkle at the corners.

“Yeah, I will, don’t you worry about that.” He sinks into the seat next to you and doesn’t spare you a second glance.

Dr. Won walks in, the picture of put-togetherness, killing whatever flirty response you had formulated.

You thought you had enjoyed having a crush before, but admiring someone and imagining a life together from afar was worlds away from talking and sitting next to said object of affection. This shouldn’t be that big of a deal. You shouldn’t be tripping all over yourself when Yoongi sits next to you in lecture.

Whatever Dr. Won is saying is drowned out by Yoongi sitting next to you. It feels deeply unfair how he affects you, when he gets to sit next to you like nothing important is happening. It’s just another day in lecture, preparing for the midterms coming up.

He’s not even doing anything, minding his own business. You shouldn’t be swooning when he is just sitting there, again bouncing his leg, taking diligent notes. From the furtive glances you steal, even his handwriting is attractive. Endearing, even if it was a little messy and looping over the printed lines.

True fact: the only reason why Yoongi fidgets so much is because of the effect you had on him. It drives him up the wall, the way you keep tucking your hair behind your ear. He envies your unfaltering concentration, the look in your eye when you see something on the Powerpoint slides that you have to jot down.

Yoongi can’t stand to silently sit next to you without doing anything anymore. Taking his pen, he scrawls on the corner of your neat notes. He knows it’ll piss you off, but that’s the reaction that he wants.

do you have any idea what is going on

He watches carefully for your reaction. Satisfaction creeps into his neutral expression when you notice, confusion turning into what could only be a lovestruck smile, and then into an irritated grimace. Fuck, even the curve of your wrist was enough to drive him crazy. You pick up your pen, writing back.

No, stop writing on my stuff

Okay, new plan, Yoongi concedes. He settles for writing on the corner of his own notes, tearing off the corner. He slips the paper into your lap, fingertips skimming the top of your thigh. He doesn’t notice, but he leaves a trail of goosebumps in his wake.

don’t you think dr. won dresses like an old hag

You write back on the scrap of paper:

actually you could learn a thing or two from her

Yoongi smirks, in classic Yoongi fashion.

You know I would rock a long skirt like her

Yoongi watches you read his message, smile, and then tuck the note into your notebook.

After class, Dr. Won reminds everyone of the midterm coming up two weeks from now, and that’s when Yoongi senses an opportunity. The two of you walk out of class together, forced to walk side by side because of the student foot traffic.

“Do you like, want to study together sometime?” Yoongi blurts out, louder than he needs to be, even among the hum of the other students.

He clears his throat. “I mean, we’ve shared a lot of classes, so.”

You can’t help but laugh in surprise, or maybe incredulousness. You resist the urge to let the satisfaction show on your face. “I didn’t know you ever noticed.”

“Of course I did. You’re like, the biggest nerd on the planet.” Even when Yoongi is teasing you, he can’t help but sound bashful.

You gasp in mock offense. “There’s nothing wrong with being a nerd.” You both stop, standing at the mouth of the lecture hall.

“Of course not.” He’s awfully close to you, close enough that you can see the mole on the tip of his nose. “That’s why I’m asking you to be my study buddy.”

It’s not necessary to be standing this close. Sure, the hallway is busy, but not that busy.

“Study buddy? That sounds lame.” You scoff, playing hard to get. Both you and Yoongi know you’re going to say yes anyway.

“What else do you want me to call you? My homework homie?”

“Uh, yeah . That sounds way better than study buddy. ” You’re more proud of your humor than anything else, even if it earns a deserved eye-roll from Yoongi.

“And midterms are coming up. So you know, mutually beneficial.” Yoongi takes a sip from his coffee, peering at you from behind the rim.

“Like… friends with benefits?” You can’t help yourself. It’s just too easy to flirt with him.

Yoongi tongues his cheek, he grins. “Only if you want it to be.” He’s having way too much fun with this.

You try to hide your reaction, but Yoongi notices anyway. (He notices a lot of things you don’t realize.) Your wide-eyed shock, the blush that’s flushing down your neck, the way you open your mouth as if to say something equally as flirtatious back, your laugh, like this is actually way more casual than it is.

“So I’ll take that as a yes,” He says. You could get used to the playful lilt in his voice.

“Only if you promise you won’t just copy my work.” You cross your arms in front of your chest, suddenly very aware of how tall he is.

“I live and die by the honor code, y/n. Of course I won’t,” Yoongi says, leaning ever closer to you in the cramped hallway.

You quirk an eyebrow. “Does a man of honor text me like you did last night?”

“Oh come on. If you’re going to be friends with me you’re going to have to learn to laugh at dirty humor.” Friends? It’s a start, at least.

“Who said that I didn’t like dirty humor?”

“Hmm, I did.” There’s a glint in his eyes that wasn't there before. “You’d have to be a woman of your word and show me.”

“You’ll just have to wait and see.” You flash an innocent smile, like you don’t see the implication of what he’s saying.

Tuesdays have always been the most bittersweet day of the week for you. It’s lesson day, but oh, it’s lesson day. It feels like the day of judgement, every single week. It’s a culmination of all the blood and tears that you’ve poured into your music in the past week, another chance at evaluation. You’ve known your violin teacher longer than you’ve been in college, and it still shouldn’t scare you this much.

The nervousness spins and dips in your chest as you make your way up the winding stairs that lead to the music building. You usually soothe the apprehension by reminding yourself of all the things you’ve done to prepare, just like you usually do before you go out on stage. This week you were supposed to get the rest of the Bach partita memorized and cleaned up, but it still resides in your memory as disjointed bits and pieces of what it’s actually supposed to sound like. You try to run through the parts that you were stuck on last night, but you draw a blank. You usually don’t take this long to commit pieces to memory, but when you open up your score, all you can think about is the unmoving stare of the audience. Seeing your life flash before your eyes every time you stare at your pencil markings isn’t exactly conducive to productive practice sessions.

As you retrieve your violin from your locker and make your way to the practice room, you feel like you’re preparing yourself for your own undoing—every scale, every tick of the metronome—another step towards your demise.

It shouldn’t be this serious, but the pitter-pattering of your heart says otherwise. You glance at the clock. It’s time. You pack up now, so you have a couple extra minutes to wait solemnly outside of her office, staring at the posters that advertise the professionals who come to perform concerts at your college. Next week, a pianist and violinist duo is coming. In the picture, they’re smiling proudly next to a Steinway piano. They look proud of themselves. They probably don’t feel like they’re allergic to the stage, probably live for the audience’s applause. That’s probably how they ended up there on the poster, after all.

Your violin teacher isn’t scary. She’s a homey, lovely old woman whose wrinkles come from a lifetime of smiling. She’s the type to bring you sweet, homemade pastries that are almost as warm as her hugs during the toughest parts of the semester. Which makes the moments when she’s unhappy all the more painful. It’s not her fear that plagues you, but disappointment.

The door clicks open, and you have no more time to ponder your failures as a musician. You gather your things and head inside. Nothing inside her office has changed since the previous week. The same teetering stack of well-loved method books sits on her chair, the same humidifier whirring steadily in the corner, the same Dr. Kim Hyung-Seo sitting on the piano bench.

“Good afternoon, y/n! How’s the Bach coming along?” She asks, like you haven’t spent the past week treating this piece like your mortal enemy. She takes a sip of her warm chamomile tea, from the same snowman-shaped mug that she’s used every week, because she is that endearing. In another life, she would probably be your grandmother.

“Good morning. Ah, you know…” You trail off and gesture into the air, trying to hide your grimace. How could you possibly describe the unease and unsureness around performing without crossing some kind of professional boundary?

“Let’s hear it, it’s okay. Are you all warmed up?” You nod as you unpack your things again. As you move to put the Bach score on the music stand, she tuts.

“Didn’t we agree that this would be memorized last week?” Dr. Kim flips through her lesson notes, inky blue scrawling over the pages. “Yeah, it should be memorized. Close the score, darling.” Usually, when Dr. Kim calls you darling, warmth unfurls in your chest and you beam. You’re not feeling particularly warm right now.

“Ah, okay…” With slow reluctance, you close the score, the plain paper cover mocking you. You lift your bow to your violin, and shut your eyes. You don’t want to watch this.

Yoongi (4:38pm): Hey

Yoongi (4:38pm): wanna study tonight :]

If there’s anything Yoongi is good at, it’s having perfect timing. You half-walk, half-run out of the music building, sucking frigid air into your lungs. The cold weather seems to force the tears back into your eyes. If there was ever a worst-case scenario for how a lesson could go, then that was what just played out in the music room.

Shutting your eyes won’t stop the barrage of images, playing the world’s cruelest slideshow behind your eyelids. Your teacher’s pursed lips, the still fingers clasped over her mug, the pinched brow.

“y/n, we don’t have much more time to clean it up…” Her words echo in your head. “We’ll try again next week…” The disappointment was the worst thing, the downward tone in her voice. “I expected better…”

You (5:15pm): maybe

You (5:15pm): what time?

Yoongi (5:20pm): like now

Yoongi (5:23pm): are you busy?

You (5:25pm): no I just finished up a lesson

You (5:26pm): i’m about to study in the library if you want to join me

Yoongi (5:30pm): I don’t want to go to the library :(

You (5:31pm): why not

Yoongi (5:32pm): if I feed you dinner will you come to my apartment

Yoongi (5:33pm): I really don’t want to walk to the library it’s too damn cold

After all, the best way to a woman's heart is through her stomach.

You (5:35pm): fine

You (5:35pm): it better be a hell of a dinner

Yoongi (5:36pm): of course it will

Yoongi sends you his location, and you’re walking as fast as you can through the campus to make it to his apartment before you can freeze your fingers off.

Yoongi’s expression is nothing short of scandalized when you show up at his door. It’s a typical mouse hole apartment, his front door identical to all the other ones that you’d passed to get here.

“You’re not wearing gloves? In this weather?”

“I don’t have any…” You rasp out. You’re tired. Your throat hurts from trying to hold tears back during your entire lesson, and you have no spirit left to give Yoongi an innuendo-laced comeback.

I expected better.

“Oh my god, you’ve been playing violin for how many years and nobody ever told you to wear gloves when it’s cold?” He leads you inside, the warmth abating the cold that’s wormed its way underneath your clothes and into your bones.

“For God’s sake, y/n, hasn’t anyone ever told you about the importance of blood circulation?” Yoongi clasps your hands between his, rubbing and blowing air on them to warm them up. He doesn’t notice your surprise amid his chastising, muttering something about common sense. You don’t try to keep your guard up this time, just trying to bite tears back at the mention of musicianship. The firm press of his hands grounds you.

“There.” He smiles, proud of himself. “Warm now?”

Oh yeah, you’re definitely warm. In every dimension of the word. But you don’t tell him that, so you settle for a weak nod.

“You can put your stuff there. I’m hungry now, let’s eat first?” You hum in affirmation as you settle your heavy backpack on his cramped couch.

It turns out that Min Yoongi’s idea of gourmet cooking is heating up two freezer-burnt Hot Pockets while you watch him putter around the tiny kitchenette. This is the first time you’ve ever seen him without his glasses, and this is when you finally internalize that Yoongi will always look good no matter what he does or wears or says.

“You made it seem like you were cooking,” You say, just to fill the silence.

“Uhhhh, I don’t know who told you I was capable of cooking, but they were wrong. I can show you a good time in other ways, no?”

You snort.

In hopes of saving time, he microwaves both of Hot Pockets at the same time. You silently bristle at the fact that even your dinner is getting more action than you are these days.

You and Yoongi eat together in his tiny living room, sitting on mismatched stools.

“How did your lesson go?” Yoongi says, more focused on eating than on you.

“Oh…” You set your Hot Pocket down, sighing in defeat. The image of Dr. Kim sitting behind the piano bench, her dissatisfaction like a noxious cloud. “I… I… got ripped apart. I’m a little behind with preparing for the Bach festival, but it doesn’t matter. Nothing I do or prepare will make me less stressed about it.” You slump onto the counter, recounting all the things you did wrong in your lesson today. I expected better.

“What’s the stress about? We still have over a month, right?” You’re suddenly jealous of Yoongi. His nonchalance, his seemingly constant reassurance that everything is going to be okay.

“I’m not worried about that… just, no matter how much I practice, I’m gonna fuck it up on stage.” Your forehead pinches in frustration.

“Are you that nervous?”

“I’ve always been this nervous. For any performance. I haven’t performed alone in a while… and you know. It’s Bach, and everyone expects me to do some amazing job, and it’s like, I don’t know if I can deliver that and-” Yoongi eases his hand on your shoulder, calm, reassuring. He looks concerned. Like he cares. Like a friend.

“When was the last time you played something just for the fun of it?”

“I don’t know, maybe my freshman year? I used to arrange themes from movies.”

“We should work on something together, just for fun. We’re such a perfect instrument combo, there’s so much repertoire for violin and piano.”

“What did you have in mind? Do you even have enough time for that?” (You know you don’t have enough time for that.)

“It doesn’t even have to be a difficult piece. It could be something easy or hard, I don’t care.” Yoongi ponders his next words over a bite of his food. “I… I... just want to see you less stressed out. And music should always be fun, not just for a grade. What kind of music would you be making if you weren’t happy?”

“I don’t know…”

“I know this one Brahms piece that I think you’d like. Totally fits your vibe. We can just work on it slowly, you know? Or we could arrange the Anpanman theme song, I don’t care.”

“I think I’m mostly good for the midterm, except for the composer dates,” Yoongi spins around in his office chair, dragging his feet on the ground.

“Me too,” You say, as you drink in the sight of his room. For someone who claims to abhor studying and all things academic, Yoongi appears to be quite the organized student. Despite the constant claim that his education is merely a necessary evil, he keeps his notes organized in uniform binders on a well-cared for bookshelf. The bookshelf is adjacent to the extremely detailed wall calendar, marked full with due dates and deadlines in pens of various colors.

He runs his fingers over the binders to locate the binder allocated to the species counterpoint class you’re taking together.

“I already have flashcards for everything before the Romantic Era, but I’m so fucked for everything else.”

“Why not just use Quizlet like everyone else?” You say. You eye his neatly made bed and the Kumamon stuffed animal shoved hastily underneath it.

“Back in my day, we used flashcards like cavemen,” Yoongi reasons, despite the fact that your birthdays are months within each other. “And besides, they feel better in your hand.” Of course, they’re indexed by color and musical era.

“Ugh, I hate sitting at my desk. My back is starting to hurt,” Yoongi says, despite having worked for about ten minutes. “Do you want to lay down?” He pats the fluffy comforter adjacent to him. Yoongi doesn’t wait for your response however, plopping down on the bed with an audible thump.

“Okay, old man,” You jibe, but you’ve also been sitting for a majority of the day. Your back is aching too, but you’ll never admit it to him.

Sometimes, at times like these, you wish you could just muster up the courage and stop playing this game of cat and mouse with him. When you lay on his sheets that smell like him, quizzing each other, you wonder what would happen if you confessed your feelings for him, right then and there.

Or outlined exactly how exactly you would take his cock in your mouth, given the chance. Other times, you consider the fact that he might like to play with his food before diving in. Whatever it was, it scared you, the unease climbing up your spine and staying put.

You wonder if he understands the implication of you so casually lounging on his bed, but then you realize that you likely don’t exist in the realm of romantic possibilities for him. He likely sees you as the nerdy, sexless violinist that spends all her time slaving away in the practice room or the library. That’s why you’re here, after all. To help study for the midterms coming up. “Being friends with him is better than nothing,” you tell yourself, but you can’t really bring yourself to believe it.

You don’t remember, or at least don’t care to, when Yoongi started touching every aspect of your life. It’s really only been a couple of weeks since the two of you started studying together. You don’t dare to imagine how much of your thoughts he would occupy if you continue your friendship into the coming months. If your crush of massive proportions was bad before, it’s truly out of hand now. It certainly didn’t help that he actually knew you existed now. He spammed you gifs of baby animals while he was on the way to class, texted you links to performances of pieces that he was working on. He even began to send you teasing texts on the mornings that he made it to the practice rooms before you.

Every experience you have is colored by thoughts of him. The coffee that you drink like ambrosia conjures up images of him sitting across from you in some far-off sunlit cafe, laughing at all your jokes. On the nights when sleep escapes you, you lay awake rehashing over and over what you had said to him on the previous day. You even fall into reveries when he’s sitting there right next to you.

It’s inescapable, especially with the Bach Festival looming over your head. The more time you spend in the practice room, the more you go back to that one fateful night. You can still see the image of him now, sitting before the piano, playing Chopsticks.

You both make your way through the fat deck of flashcards, Yoongi quizzing you first.

“J.S. Bach?” You note to yourself even the upswing in his voice was cute. How did you ever let yourself get so whipped?

“1685 to…” You falter, still stuck on his voice. Even his voice drives you crazy.

“Come on, you should know this.” He drives his point home by poking you in the side, and he likes the gasp that you make.

“1750.” Of course you know Bach’s birth and death dates by heart. You see it every time you open up your score. Even the scant prod he gave you in the side, over your clothes, is enough to make your skin heat up.

“And if you ever tickle me again, you won’t live long enough for midterms,” You threaten, but your harsh tone of voice doesn’t reach the light in your eyes.

“Brahms?”

“Ugh, fuck, I don’t know. 1832 to?”

“Wrong.” He sets the cards down next to him, looking at you in mock disappointment. In an instant, he attacks you with tickles, and your efforts to bat him away are fruitless.

“This-this is what you get for not knowing when Brahms was born! Learn through punishment! 1833 to 1897, remember that next time!!” He collapses on top of you, burying his face in your neck, unrelenting. Yoongi sounds almost gleeful in your torture.

You writhe under his touch, and for all the wrong reasons.

For the first time in your life, you’re almost glad you’re ticklish. Your eyes roll back into your head, not of your own accord. It’s too much, the soft skin of his cheek pressed up against your neck, the warm weight of his body against yours, the way his legs cage you in. A moan slips in between your helpless giggles, and Yoongi doesn’t miss it.

“Uhhh, what was that?” He doesn’t stop, merciless in his advance. “I didn’t know you liked tickling… like that.” He’s teasing you, now. He can’t hide his pleased grin.

Between gasps, you manage to pant, “I… don’t…”

“Then what? Tell me.” That’s when Yoongi relents, leaning back. He continues to straddle you, because he’s cruel like that. (And because he likes it too.)

“You’re just… ugh, I don’t know… so close.” In Yoongi’s eyes, you’re a study in debauchery. From your struggle, your hair is mussed, the hem of your shirt awry. Your cheeks are flushed, from embarrassment or from the tickling, you don’t know. Your chest frantically rises and falls, trying to regain your breath.

You, on the other hand, feel fucking ridiculous. Contrary to popular belief, being on the recieving end of tickling is fucking physically exhausting.

Yoongi is stuck on the hot and bothered look on your face, except for the hard look in your eye. You despise being tickled, even if it is Min Yoongi doing the tickling. He wonders what you’d look like if you were underneath him in… different circumstances.

Would it compare?

“I… I… I just…” You avert your gaze now, hiding your face behind your hands. You can’t stand to look at him right now.

“Spill it, or I’ll go back to tickling you until you break.” He grabs your hands away from your face, pinning them next to your head.

He really isn’t going to make this easy for you, is he.

This is overwhelming. The eye contact is too much. The weight of his hands on your wrists, holding you down, is too much. The way his panting breath tickles the skin beneath your collar is too much. You’ve had a bad day, the voice in the back of your head whispers. He makes you forget how awful this semester has been. He makes you feel better. Make this day easier on yourself. Just give in.

There’s no hiding it now, you concede.

You shut your eyes, unable to face him. “It’s just… been a while.”

“Uh-huh. Continue?” He places his hands back on your stomach, as if in warning.

“Since uhhhh… I’ve done… anything… with anyone…” Your words hang heavy in the air. Your secret is out.

He laughs. He really has the audacity to laugh.

“Shut up! I’m just like, touch starved, okay?” You’re definitely just blushing out of embarrassment, at this point.

Yoongi starts to ponder if he crossed too far of a line, but you continue anyway. You huff, indignant and desperate to cover your ass. This is not how you ever imagined telling Yoongi you were ever interested in him, sexual or not.

“Not everyone is like, the campus pussy magnet and gets to fuck whenever they want,” You say.

He rolls his eyes. “Okay, I’m not the campus pussy magnet. We’re... not so different. I haven’t been with anyone, um, in a while.” Now Yoongi takes his turn to blush and stutter. He does that thing he always does when he’s nervous, runs a hand through his hair and lets it rest on the nape of his neck.

“I find that hard to believe. No need to lie out of pity. Like, come on. Look at you. You’re all…” You gesture down his body, “And you have that whole vibe going on, and you’re tall, and you have good taste in cologne, and-and-and you play the piano , and ugh. You should know that by now.” You babble on. You’re not that good at keeping secrets, anyway. Might as well let the cat out of the bag while you’re at it.

Yoongi doesn’t say anything, but you’re not fazed. By now, you’re used to the long silences that elapse when you’re with him. You wait for him to talk first, just so you can discreetly enjoy the feeling of him straddling you for a little longer. You try to pass off the silence as you quietly fuming at him for calling out your lackluster sex life, but you’re really just trying get yourself together.

Then he starts laughing. Again.

“What are you laughing for now?” Your brow furrows in frustration.

“Nothing, nothing, don’t be mad. I just didn’t think that tickling would be a turn on for you.”

“It’s not!”

“To be completely honest with you, you look like one of those really innocent soft girls on the outside but you’re actually like, into choking and have a secret sex dungeon.” He doesn’t seem to care that you’ve all but revealed your massive, terminal crush on him.

You sigh, but you’re just glad he gave you something to fire back with.

“You and I both know that the university dorms are too small for a sex dungeon, Yoongi. I can’t even have candles in my room. What sex dungeon is complete without candles?”

“Oh, a devil in the details. The ambiance is important, I see…” That devious smile of his makes a comeback.

“Oh, shut up. Give me the flashcards, four-eyes.” He relinquishes the flashcards, but he still continues to straddle you.

“Woah, there’s no need to insult my glasses.”

You ignore him, desperate to move on from your momentary lapse in judgement. “Haydn?”

“1732 to 1809. What about music? Music must be important if you care about the ambiance. Answer my question.”

You laugh to cover up how worked up you are. “Maybe you can find out after we finish reviewing. Scarlatti?”

“1660 to 1725. What kind of music do you listen to? R&B, something sexy?” He sits up now, spurred on by your refusal to answer his questions.

“Or do you listen to classical music then, too? Does Chopin get your blood flowing?” He’s being insufferable now.

You groan into the pillow. “Yoongiii, let’s focus.”

“If it’s something like Liszt, I’m sure I have a couple recommendations.”

Yoongi sits up straighter, waggles his eyebrows in a way you definitely shouldn’t find endearing. “Or, I could record something for you…”

You snap. “Just, I don’t know, sometimes I listen to music?” Your attempts to stop the blushing are in vain, heat blooming across your cheeks and down your neck. It’s even harder to stop when it’s your embarrassingly short sexual history on the line.

“I prefer dirty talk anyways…” You murmur under your breath, wishing he could just get the fuck off your case. The more he keeps talking about things like this, in that tone of voice, the harder it’s going to get to keep your ever-growing crush a secret.

Still, some small part (let’s be honest, the monkey brain part of you) of you, the part of you that aches for him, wants to spur him on.

“What was that?”

“Nothing! Nothing.”

“Hmm… something about dirty talk?” Fuck, does Yoongi have a good ear. He smiles. He knows he’s gotten you now.

Okay, you should probably admit to yourself that he’s flirting with you now. The touches, the holding you down, the insistence on pushing this tiny matter, it all adds up. And the math says that Min Yoongi is flirting with you.

“Mmm, nothing.” You snuggle a little deeper into his bedsheets, playing coy.

“You know, like during sex? Don’t make me tickle you again, because I will stoop that low.”

“I don’t remember saying that…” You mock-pretend to ponder his question, catch your bottom lip between your teeth. Out of the corner of your eye, you can see his gaze fall downward. You know you’ve gotten him now.

“Can you refresh my memory?”

“Like… you know.” He shrugs.

“I’m an auditory learner. Do you have an example?”

“Hmm, let me think… I’ll tease you until you’re begging for me to touch you properly? Does that ring a bell for you?”

“No…” You bring your hands to your face to cover up your blush, and because you can’t stand to look at him. Not when he’s talking to you like that, with that look in his eye, his hands on your body. “It doesn’t…” You laugh, even beneath his weight.

He laughs. “I’m just teasing. You’re so cute when I get a rise out of you.”

Oh.

#armywriterssupport #btsgoldnet #yoongi smut #bts smut #yoongi fanfic #yoongi scenarios #bts fanfic #bts scenarios #bts #bts x reader

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minsugapie · 4 years

Text

Mary’s Song: part 16b (3034 words) - Fighting

• • • • • •

Jeon Jungkook wasn’t just your anime-loving, manga-drawing, hair-pulling, ex-neighbour. You hadn’t even spoken to him since he had moved away. But the world worked in funny ways because...

He was probably the reason you were still alive.

• • • • • •

“And our daddies used to joke about the two of us

Growing up and fallin' in love

And our mamas smiled, and rolled their eyes

And said, "Oh, my, my, my””

• • • • • •

previous // current \\ next

masterlist

• • • • • •

Tags : @minhyuksfatgf @igotarmyofarohas @dixonsbugaboo @thealexalcala @salty-for-suga @worshiphoseok @okaysoplshelpme @jeonlovers @acupfullofsuga @beach-bitch-bitch-beach @hannahdinse8 @jaiuneamesolitaiire @dammit-jjk @dreamcatcherjiah @xxxanimangxxx @wrmnssoul @ephyra1230 @imynnow @prdshobi @klverse @butterflylion @fuddyize @ahnneyong @nanie5 @squidyelmosquidbutt @uxwi

• • • • • •

I feel so much internal embarrassment after writing this but yolo I guess… but uh yeah, this is SMUT so do with that what you will.

**also this is unedited so sorry for mistakes. we all know im the queen of typos as it is...oof

• • • • • •

You’d just finished messaging Coven about what your plans were for tonight, and how you would go about it. However, your nerves were still on high-alert. Jungkook had denied you a few times now, and you knew that if this didn’t persuade him, then you’d be devastated.

You realized he had his reasons, but you wanted him now. He was making it extremely difficult to continue being friends. There was just a point where you needed to evolve. At least you were sure that you’d go crazy if you had to keep pretending like you hadn’t been head over heels for this boy since you were six…even with the large speed bump in between your meetings.

You sighed, finally getting up from the bed and deciding to do something. Jungkook was working at the desk in the living room, so you knew you wouldn’t be interrupted by him as you got the room, and yourself, ready. The first thing you did was make the bed tidy up the space, making sure that it was tidy before heading into the bathroom. You locked the door and stared at yourself in the mirror for a white a few minutes. You listened to a full song that Jungkook was drawing to before you took a deep breath and started the shower, getting your razor, shampoo, and body wash. You wanted it to be as perfect as possible; you wanted to look as perfect as possible. The shower that only normally took you a few minutes took longer than usual, and you hoped that he hadn’t realized. You spent extra time brushing your teeth and blowdrying your hair, too.

Who were you kidding? He didn’t notice anything when he was drawing.

You were again staring at yourself in the mirror, wondering if you should’ve put on makeup or not. You decided on makeup (but not an aggressive amount) because you wanted to have the whole experience of the beautiful lingerie that Cherry bought you. You thought it would look incomplete without it.

Rushing back into the bedroom after you finished getting ready, you only briefly took a peak into the living room to see what Jungkook was doing. He hadn’t moved. Maybe he’d slouched over slightly, but that was it.

Digging into the back of one of the drawers in the dresser that Jungkook bought for you, you found the box with the present inside. You took it out carefully, pulling it out and taking a good look at it. You wondered if you could even pull it off…if he would even like it. However, before you could back out, Cherry’s voice floated into the back of your mind, telling you that you were beautiful and that he’d love it. It was enough for you to drop the towel and put it on right then and there. It wasn’t the most comfortable thing you’d worn, but it wasn’t too bad. You let your fingers feel the fabric draping down your body and you hummed it approval. It looked exactly like the first time you’d tried it on, if not maybe slightly better after all this mental preparation that you did.

You hung the towel on your hook before taking one last look at yourself in the mirror. Yes, this would have to do. Taking your thousandth deep breath of the day, you made both your hands into fists and whispered, “Fighting!”

There was a change of plans because you decided that calling him into the room wouldn’t get his attention like you wanted, so you changed tactics. Instead, you tiptoed out to where Jungkook was sitting, trying to be as quiet as you were able. Instead of just walking in front of you, you peeked your head over the side of his shoulder, taking a peak at what he was drawing. It was Honey, not that you figured it would be anything else. She was the main character of his webtoon. Yet, you’d noticed recently her becoming even more realistic…

“You smell nice. Did you have a shower?” He asked, not taking his eyes off the tablet.

“I got ready…are you busy?” you asked, moving one of your hands around to his front and resting it on his chest. You briefly felt his heartbeat increase, giving you a slight boost of confidence.

“I’m just drawing,” he answered, but you noticed his pen stop moving as your hand moved down his chest to feel his muscle. “What are you doing?” He added before you could answer. He grabbed your hand from on his chest and pulled you around so he could see you from the front. As soon as you came into view, he froze.

“What do you think?” You asked, waiting for any sort of reaction from him that wasn’t only his face the was void of emotion.

“What is that?” He asked, clearing his throat. You noticed his eyes wander around, stopping briefly on your breasts before forcefully moving back to your eyes.

“Cherry bought this for me for Christmas,” you admitted, taking a small step towards him. He hopped out of his chair so quick that it almost fell over. He was acting as if you touch would set him on fire.

“Cherry…” he swore, taking a step back again. Licking his lips once, he continued, “But why are you wearing it right now?”

You cocked your head to the side, pushing some hair behind your shoulder. “What? You don’t like it?”

“No!” He answered a little too quickly. Realizing his betrayal, he added, “But shouldn’t that be saved for when you’re going to do something?”

Now you took another step towards him, grabbing his hand. He didn’t move; it was like he had no idea what to do. “What if I told you I was going to do something?”

“What do you mean?”

“…with you.” You finished, pulling him backwards towards the bedroom you shared.

“Wait, what exactly is happening right now?” He asked, looking around the apartment like he needed to look at anything else but you.

“You’re a smart boy, Bun, can’t you figure it out?” You asked, knowing you would eventually succeed when he tightly closed his eyes and threw his head back while still letting you drag him to the bedroom.

“Honey, I can’t,” he said the dreaded words again, running his free hand through his wild hair.

“If I hear that one more time,” you warned, pulling him closer to you.

“What do you want from me?” He asked, eyes still closed.

“D-do you not want to? Don’t lie to me, either. I can tell when you’re lying.”

He opened his eyes and made a face. “That’s what you’re worried about? That I don’t want to? Look at yourself, Honey, of course I want to. This is just so complicated.”

You took his arms and spun him around, sitting him down on the edge of the bed. “It’s really not…just stop thinking so much about what you think I want and do what you want for once.”

He stared up at you with his lips slightly parted. He seemed to be paralyzed for a minute, so you grabbed his hands again and led them to your hips. His eyes snapped to his hands, and he started to move them across the soft material. The material bunched under his palms as his hands move up towards your breasts. You stepped closer to him, making it easier for the both of you until he unexpectedly pulled you down onto his lap. “Is this what you wanted?” He whispered, moving in towards your lips.

“I want more,” you confidently admitted before kissing him.

“How much more?” He asked after moment, moving your hips to tell you to grind into him.

“Do I even need to answer that?” You asked, taking his bottom lip between you teeth playfully.

He groaned into your mouth, and you smiled in response.

“Fuck, Honey, you don’t even understand how much I’ve thought about this moment,” he revealed, flipping you over and pushing your back into the bed. “Remind me to thank Cherry unnie next time I see her…This thing is not coming off tonight.” His eyes roamed freely around your body now, and you let your arms fall to your side, allowing him to do whatever he wanted for a minutes.

His fingers lightly traced from your lips down your chest and between your breasts, lips following closely behind.

“She knows it’s being put to good use already,” you breathed, trying to remain steady as his hot lips started to press kisses on your hips.

“She knows what’s going on?” He asked, spreading your legs apart and brushing his nose over the lace underwear.

“Why do you think Jimin and Tae left in a rush?” You struggled to concentrate as he played with you. “I asked them to leave.”

You squirmed, trying to keep focused. In a second, Jungkook stopped all movements and hovered above you. “What exactly did you say to everyone?”

You bit your lip to try to stop yourself from laughing at his confused expression. But now you wanted some power over him. Before you answered, you pulled at the bottom of his hoodie, trying to tug it over his head. You flipped him over, taking the chance to admire him for once. “I told them that I wanted to have sex with you, so they needed to be out of the house,” you shrugged, watching in delight as his skin got goosebumps from your light touches.

“You’re naughty,” he groaned.

You leaned back down to his face and whispered huskily, “Have you thought about me when you’re all alone before? In the bed? In the shower?”

You heard him visibly swallow.

“Have you thought about me taking you? Or my tongue stroking you?”

He still couldn’t answer when you dipped your hand between your bodies and into his sweatpants. You watched his facial expression in curiosity when you cupped him, simultaneously palming him and rolling your body into his.

“Answer me, Bun,” you demanded, wrapping your fingers around him harder as leverage.

“Holy fuck yes, ok, I do,” he managed, and you loosened your grip slightly.

You kiss his collarbone and neck before putting your lips against his ear, “Are you sure?”

“Yes! And it’s only you every damn time.” His hands were holding your hips to keep any sort of stability.

“Because I’ve thought about you before,” you continued, starting to pump him.

“Y-you have?” He was breathy, letting you do whatever you wanted to him.

“Sometimes when you’re not home, or when you are, I like to imagine it’s you and not my own hand…” Jungkook’s digits slipped into your panties, pushing them aside as he started rubbing you.

Your lips found his again, and he eagerly pushed his tongue against yours. It was a sweet moment, both of you letting the other do what they wanted, but Jungkook pulled back sooner than you’d hoped when you felt him start to buck his hips into your hand. “You have to stop,” he said before throwing his head back and pulling your hand from out of his pants.

When you finally take a look at his face, you see his flushed cheeks and red lips. “Did I do something you didn’t like?”

“Oh not at all. I just want this to last to the actual sex part,” he admitted, rolling over to find a condom in a drawer near the bed. You were under him, smiling as he seemed frustrated at not finding the box right away.

At his distracted state, you let your fingers slip into the waistband of his sweats, guiding them down the curve of his bum and hips…and you did let your fingers linger on the hard muscle for a little longer.

When he finally acquired the little packet, he pushed himself off you to take his sweats all the way off and put on the condom. You watched in fascination as Jungkook’s was illuminated by the last bits of sunlight, pinks and purples from the sunset giving him a beautiful glow on the already gleaming skin. His hands deftly put on the protection, hands not missing a beat as if he’d had a lot of practice.

When he finished, you let your eyes linger on his stomach. He really was one of God’s favourites.

“Are you sure you don’t want to take this off?” You asked, gesturing to the garment that admittedly didn’t actually cover much.

“It stays on,” his voice was lower than it had been a minute ago. He’d regained his composure. “But these come off.”

His fingers hooked into the sides of your panties and pulled them down your waist.

“Listen, Bun, if I forced you into something that you didn’t want…”

“I’m literally already naked and wearing a condom, and you’re going to ask me that…just shut up,” he laughed, positioning himself between your legs.

You waited, already having a better time with Jungkook than you had with Nic. When his hand went around your back, you took him in and grabbed his back to hold him close.

“My seventeen-year-old would not have believed what’s happening right now,” he admitted, looking down at you.

You couldn’t focus on any of his words again, trying to adjust to him as quickly as possible. You knew he was uncomfortable as you forced him to stay where he was for a moment longer, but as soon as you told him to move, he obeyed. Slowly, he began his thrusts but sped up soon. You didn’t mind, having gotten a lot out of him earlier.

Jungkook’s hands removed yours from his back and he pushed them down beside your head, linking his fingers with yours. His thrusts were successful in winding you up, knowing that neither of you were going to be able to hold out much longer.

“Honey, I can’t hold it much longer,” he breathed into your shoulder, teeth gently biting the skin.

You let yourself go as soon as you heard his voice, not able to effectively breathe or answer him. All you were able to do was breathily moan his name.

“Fuck, it’s over,” he groaned, thrusting into you a few last times, effectively riding out his own orgasm.

Jungkook’s face during this most vulnerable moment was a blessing to see. You said it once, and you’d say it again, he was one of God’s favourites. There was simply no way that one man could look so deliciously appetizing at every moment. You were exhausted, but if he asked, you’d go right into a second round…you were in no position to deny him.

But he didn’t. He immediately fell beside you on the bed, catching his breath.

“Fighting,” you whispered.

“What?” He asked, looking into your eyes. You stared back at him with equal intensity.

“Doesn’t matter.”

Jungkook grabbed your cheeks, pulling your face to his. His lips found yours, and he smiled. Three long kisses were placed on your mouth before he asked, “Should we order some food?”

• • • • • •

“When was the last time you had sex with Nic?” Jungkook asked out of the blue, playing with your hair. You were laying together on the couch, and you were comfortable positioned half between his legs, half in front of him. There was a movie playing on the tv and the finished takeout on the coffee table, but you were barely paying attention.

When you hesitated, he clarified, “I mean enjoyable sex.”

“Maybe eight months…it was too long,” you revealed, hiding your face in his sweater, which you’d gladly changed into afterwards. “So I guess a thank you is appropriate.”

You felt his chest move in laughter. “There’s no need to thank me, Honey. It was good for both of us.”

When it was silent for a minute, you shyly asked, “When was the last time you had sex?” Why were you being shy around him all of a sudden? “Be honest with me, Bun. I know you’ve gotten around.”

“I don’t get around that much, but the weekend before you called me was the last time,” he admitted, shifting so the blanket was covering you better.

“How many people?”

Jungkook breathed through his nose hard before saying, “Why are you asking questions that you won’t like the answer to?”

“I’m just curious,” you answered, playing with his hand that was around your waist.

“A lot.” He thought he’d get away with that but you were adamant about knowing for some reason. You knew you shouldn’t have been so curious, but you were…

“Bun…”

“I’ve hooked up with a girl every time I’ve gone out, okay. I don’t know how many I’ve had sex. Is that what you wanted to hear? Are you mad? Disappointed? Disgusted?” He huffed, seeming frustrated.

“I’m not any of those things. I was just curious because Cherry and Yoon told me that you’d never been in a serious relationship.”

“They’re right.”

“Why? You obviously have enough people that find you attractive…”

“I guess it just wasn’t meant to be. There may have been someone in the back of my mind that I couldn’t stop thinking about. She’s kind of a pest and asks too many questions, but she’s cute.” He cuddled closer into you, spooning you. His lips were pressed to the back of your neck and you realized that he was done talking. Actually, in only a few moments, his breaths became deeper.

He’d fallen asleep.

Had you been on his mind the whole time? Even after he said those mean things to you? You’d managed to repress your feelings for him while you were with Nic, but now that he was gone and Jungkook was your present, you knew that they were deeper than you’d anticipated. When the heated feelings of tonight wore off, and you two talked about what had happened more seriously, you wondered what he was going to say.

Jungkook was your past. Jungkook is your present. Hopefully, Jungkook would be your future.

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abrakophile · 3 years

Text

I was looking through a bunch of junk and found some letters from my dad when he was in the army. I’m afraid I'll accidently toss them, so maybe I’ll put them here?

OPs Name JUNE 02 03

I LOVE YOU

THIS IS MY NAME IN KURDISH

*my dad wrote his first and last name, and under it, in Kurdish*

ILL TRY AND FIND OUT HOW TO WRITE YOUR NAME AND MOMS TOO.

ITS STILL HOT. I WORK AND READ BOOKS TO PASS THE TIME AWAY.

HOW ARE YOU DOING? GOOD I HOPE. WHAT DO YOU DO FOR FUN? DO YOU EVER HANG OUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS? TELL THEM I SAID “WASSUP?” NAH, DONT TELL THEM. TELL ME WHAT YOUR THINKING. I’M TRYING TO SEND YOU SOME MORE OF MY DRAWINGS. WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DRAW YOU? DID YOU LIKE THE DRAWING I SENT YOU OF YOU NAME? ITS ALRIGHT IF YOU DIDNY. JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU DO WANT ME TO DRAW YOU.

(Flip Page)

THIS IS WEIRD! (The page does not have lines on the left side of it) i WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO THIS PIECE OF PAPER. HaHa

I MISS YOU ALOT. PLEASE SOND ME SOME MORE OF YOUR DRAWINGS, YOU CAN DRAW ME ANYTHING YOU WANT TO.

ARE YOU BEING GOOD FOR YOUR MOM? ITS NICE IF YOU HELP HER OUT WHILE I’M AWAY.

HAVE YOU BEEN ANYPLACE NEW? HOW IS SCHOOL GOING FOR YOU? IS MOMMY GOING TO SCHOOL? I KNOW I WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL WHEN I GET BACK. HOPEFULLY I GET THE CHANCE TO LEARN EVERYTHING THAT THERE IS TO KNOW. THAT WOULD BE GREAT.

ALSO, ID LIKE TO DO SOME FISHING? HOW ABOUT YOU? I GUESS ILL END HERE. BE GOOD AND STAY IN SCHOOL. AND JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS.

THEYRE BAD.

I LIVE YOU OP

*hearts and x’s* DADDY

---

(I don’t know if all these pages are in order or if it’s missing any, but this was the letter in the same stack as the last but this one was for my mom. In some places his indents indicate passage of time.)

I HAVENT HAD ANY TIME TO WRITE SINCE WEVE BEEN ON THE ROAD, NOT TO MENTION THAT WE CAN’T SEND MAIL WHEN WE’RE MOVING ALL THE TIME.

WEVE BEEN ON THE ROAD FOR ABOUT FIVE OR SIX DAYS, I HAVENT REALLY BEEN COUNTING. I KNOW I TOLD YOU THAT WE’D BE IN KUWAIT FOR A WHILE, BUT THAT WAS SO YOU WOULDNT BE WORRIED. I’M GOING TO KEEP THIS LETTER THOUGH, TILL I GET HOME.

ABOUT TWO NIGHTS AGO, WE DROVE THROUGH BAGDHAD, SOMEBODY SAID THAT THERE WERE PILED BODIES, I DONT KNOW IF IT WAS TRUE.

AND I GUESS YESTERDAY, A COUPLE OF PEOPLE SAID THEY SAW A MISSILE OR SOEMTHING SHOT AT US. I WAS TRYING TO FIX A TRUCK SO I DIDNT SEE IT.

ITS NOT AS DUSTY HERE IN IRAQ. IT REMINDS ME OF THE CONVOYS IN KOREA.

MOST OF THE PEOPLE WILL WAVE “HI”. SOME OTHERS DONT.

I SAW A KID OPEN HIS HAND ONCE WHILE MOVING, AND IT SAID “BUSH” THAT WAS KIND OF COOL.

OH YEAH. HERES A STORY. WHILE OUT DOING A MISSION, ONE OF OUR “BRADLEY” TANKS FIRED ON AN ENEMY AMMO TRUCK AND CLIPPED A KID. THE ROUNDS BLEW ONE OF HIS LEGS OFF AND SOME OF THE OTHER, FROM THE KNEE DOWN. SO THE MEDICS PICKED HIM UP AND BROUGHT HIM TO OUR RECONCOLIDATING POINT FOR MEDICAL TREATMENT. I GUESS HE EVENTUALLY DIED FROM LOSS OF BLOOD THE NEXT NIGHT AND YESTERDAY THEY TOOK HIM OUT AND BURIED HIM.

ALSO WE PICKED UP ABOUT 25-30 P.O.W.s AND SENT THEM SOUTH.

IT GETS PRETTY COLD AT NIGHT. AND THE DAY’S ARE VERY HOT.

SINCE WE LEFT KUWAIT ITS BEEN ME AND MENDOZA IN THE FIVE TON WRECKER AND I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT ITS BEEN EXCITING. WE KEPT GETTING SEPERATED FROM THE CONVOY AND BREAKING DOWN. BUT I THINK THAT WERE BETTER NOW. HOPEFULLY.

IM STILL WAITING TO BE AMBUSHED TO MAKE ALL THIS SEEM REAL TO ME. A PART OF ME WANTS IT AND ANOTHER DOESNT.

AND IT SEEMS LIKE ONLY OUR UNIT HAS TO STAY IN UNIFORM, EVERYONE ELSE WEARS T-SHIRTS AND BANDENA’S AND RAGS ON THEIR HEAD

WERE STILL GOING NORTH. NOBODY KNOWS HOW LONG WE’LL STAY. ITS NOT THAT BAD HERE. MEANING, IT COULD BE WORSE.

I USED A “SHIT-CHAIR”. ITS JUST A METAL CHAIR WITH A HOLE CUT IN THE MIDDLE AND THE SEAT FROM A TOILET BOLTED TO IT, GROSS.

HELICOPTERS CAN BE HEARD ALL DAY AND NIGHT. I GOT TO SEE THEM DROP BOMBS ALL DAY ABOUT 3 DAYS AGO, FROM A DISTANCE OF COURSE.

ILL BE DRIVING AGAIN, IN A MINUTE. PROBABLY RE-FUEL AND BACK ON THE ROAD AGAIN. IM ENJOYING IT.

I HAVE 8 MAGAZINES FULL OF ROUNDS. NO GRENADES, BUT I LIKE IT LIKE THAT.

SOMETIMES IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT.

I GUESS ILL END IT HERE FOR NOW

I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU TWO TWICE IF NOT THRICE AS MUCH AS YOU MIGHT MISS ME TOO.

HELLO AGAIN. WERE SOMEWHERE NEAR TIKRI + MOSUL. YESTERDAY, ME + MENDOZA WENT LOOKING FOR MOMENTO’S. WE BROKE A LOCK TO A NEAR BY BUNKER AND FOUND 6 A.K.47s! BUT ON OUR WAY BACK TO TURN THEM IN, MAJOR TATU GOT THEM FROM US. I WAS SO PISSED. BUT I GOT A GAS MASK w/ FILTER, A FULL MAGAZINE CLIP FROM ONE OF THE A.K.s AND A BERET WITH IRAQ 1 RANK ON IT.

I MADE A STENCIL FOR THE TRUCK WERE RIDING IN. ITS CALLED THE “GAMBLER.” YESTERDAY MENDOZA DROVE, SO TODAY ILL BE DRIVING.

IM NOT POSITIVE, BUT, I THINK WERE GOING TO TURKEY. NIETO SAYS THAT HE OVERHEARD SOMEBODY FROM S1 (or SI, I’m not sure) SAYING WE MIGHT GET PAID EXTRA FOR GOING THROUGH BAGHDAD.

I THINK NIETO’S MAD AT ME. CANT EXPLAIN WHY. MAYBE ITS BECAUSE IM RIDING WITH MENDOZA AND HE DOESNT LIKE MENDOZA TOO MUCH. OH WELL, WHATEVER REASON, HOPE THINGS GET NORMAL AGAIN. HAVE TO GO,

*hearts and xs*

TODAY IS THE 25th OF APRIL, I RECEIVED FIVE OR SIX (OR SEVEN) LETTERS YESTERDAY. THE LATEST WAS DATED 07 OF APRIL. THAT TELLS ME THAT ITS GOING TO TAKE A WHILE TO COMMUNICATE.

WE HAVENT RECEIVED MAIL BECAUSE WEVE BEEN MOVING NEVER STAYING IN ONE PLACE MORE THAN A DAY, OR TWO, UNTIL NOW. WE’VE BEEN IN THIS SPOT GOING ON FOUR DAYS TOMORROW?!

GIVE ME A MINUTE...

FOR THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS IVE BEEN HELPING MENDOZA PULL THE ENGINE OUT OF A 5 TON TRUCK AND SWITCH IT w/ ANOTHER ONE. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN EASY BUT THE FLY WHEEL SEIZED UP INSIDE THE BELL HOUSING. ITS FINISHED NOW AND THE RUMOR IS WE’RE LEAVING (OR MOVING) AGAIN TOMORROW.

ITS 10:33 THURSDAY MORNING. YOUR TIME IS 12:32 JUST TURNING THURSDAY.

I ALMOST CRYED WHEN I SAW ELIS PICTURE. I REALLY MISS BOTH OF YOU. LET ME BACK TO BEFORE I GOT DISTRACTED. I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO SEND MAIL BECAUSE WE’VE BEEN MOVING. BUT I GUESS THAT WHATEVER THREAT THERE WAS (IF ANY), ISNT SO THREATFUL ANYMORE, WE CAN START RECEIVING AND SENDING MAIL. NO PHONE TO CALL FROM, AND NO INTERNET TO E-MAIL FROM.

THE WHOLE UNIT IS SCATTERED, SO EVEN IF I GET WHAT YOU NEED IT’LL TAKE FOREVER TO GET IT TO YOU. LET ME PULL THOSE LETTERS BACK OUT. OH WAIT. I DID LAUNDRY AND SOME UNDERWEAR THATS DRY, FELT HARD, OH WELL, WAIT A SECOND, K

I HAD TO FOLD SOME T-SHIRTS. ALL MY SOCKS ARE STILL DAMP.

YOU CAN USE MY CONTRACT TO SHOW THAT I ENLISTED IN TEXAS AND HOWS THIS

*On a separate sheet my dad wrote a detailed note for my mom to give to someone to confirm that he did want to buy a house. He writes “I AM ALIVE AND WELL.” and “PLEASE ACCEPT THIS PAPER”, then he signed it with his scribble signature, and underneath it wrote his name in print and added “1st SQUADRON 10th CAVALRY HEADQUARTERS TROOP (I have no clue what this means)*

HOW’S THAT? HOPE I SPELLED EVERYTHING CORRECTLY. IM ALMOST READY WITH A DESIGN TO COVER THE OTHER TATTOOS ON MY LEFT FOREARM.

I JUST FINISHED LOOKING OVER ALL THOSE LETTERS YOU SENT FOR ME

IM BACK! I GOT SLEEPY SO I TRYED TO LAY DOWN FOR A LITTLE BIT. NO SLEEP. I DONT THINK. I DIDNT HAVE ENOUGH WATER TO WASH MY DCV’S AND A PAIR OF BDV’S. BESIDES FOR DRINKING WATER, BUT WE HAVE TO CONSERVE IT.

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THE RUMORS. TOMORROW WE’LL BE LEAVING FOR THE IRAN/IRAQ BORDER TO DO “PEACE KEEPING” FOR 3 TO 6 mths. OTHERS SAY THAT THE 4ID (i think is what this says) GENERAL WANTS TO KEEP US HERE TILL NOV., THATS WHEN 1 CAV WILL COME TO REPLACE US. WHILE OTHERS SAY WE MIGHT LEAVE BY JUNE. NOTHINGS FOR SURE.

SMALLER RUMORS FLOATING AROUND THE SITE ARE; RAMSEY AND SFC BACON ARE SLEEPING TOGETHER. SGT SIREK HAS PLANS TO TAKE NIETO AS HIS APPRENTICE AND PADIWAN LEARNER OF THE DARK SIDE. LITTLE BLACK ARNOLD IS MILITARY INTELLIGENCE FOR SPECIAL FORCES OPERATING UNDER COVER A SURVEILLENCE AS PART OF

*the rest of the page is blank*

IM BACK. TODAY IS THE 27th. I GOT BACK TO THE LITTLE CAMP AREA ABOUT AN HOUR AND A HALF AGO. I LEFT YESTERDAY MORNING TO, WELL, AS PART OF DE-CON (DE-CONTAMINATION) MISSION. HERES THE INFORMATION THAT I GATHERED.

A SITE HAD BEEN FOUND THAT WAS THOUGHT TO HAVE CHEMICAL WEAPONS AND 1-10 WAS APPOINTED TO GO TO THE SITE AND DE-CON THE CIVILIANS THAT WERE GOING TO OPEN THEM. AS IT TURNS OUT THE CIVILIANS HAVE BEEN DE-LAYED AND WOULD BE SET BACK 1 DAY.

THE NBC TEAM THAT I WAS WITH WERENT PREPARED TO STAY OVER NIGHT AND AS FORCASTED BY SSG MINOR WE MIGHT HAVE HAD TO STAY 3 TO 4 DAYS. EVERYBODY WAS PISSED.

LATELY ITS BEEN GETTING REALLY COLD AT NIGHT AND WE JUST HAPPENED TO BE NEAR A RUNNING RIVER. SO THE, ITS ABOUT 9 O’CLOCK AND IM BEAT, NO SLEEPING BAG OR ANYTHING TO COVER UP WITH AND I DECIDE TO TRY AND SLEEP. I GET AS COMFORTABLE AS POSSIBLE AND I GET ATTACKED BY MOSQUITOS. NOW IM PISSED SO I DECIDED TO JUST TO STAY UP ALL NIGHT. ABOUT 10PM ONE OF THE HEMTT (this might just say “hemi”, I don’t know) FUELERS SHOWS UP AND SGT TORRES SAYS HE HAS EVERYBODYS SLEEPING BAG! THE SITES ABOUT 45 MINS AWAY AND THEY LEFT SOMETIME MID AFTERNOON TO GET OUR SHIT, I HATE THESE PEOPLE.

RIGHT NOW ITS 9:01 PM AND ITS 11:02 AM YOUR TIME. I MISS YOU.

RIGHT NOW IM GOING TO ADDRESS AN ENVELOPE AND HAVE IT READY TO SEND TOMMOROW THE 28th. IM SORRY IF IT SEEMS THAT IM NOT WRITING VERY OFTEN. FOR A WHILE WE COULDN’T. AND NOW THAT IT SEEMS WE MIGHT BE HERE A LITTLE WHILE, THEYVE KEPT ME REALLY BUSY. LET ME ADDRESS THE ENVELOPES (he drew a star here)

ALL DONE. I THOUGHT ABOUT THE HOUSE A LOT TODAY AND YESTERDAY. IM SURE BY THE TIME THIS LETTER REACHES YOU, YOU’LL HAVE EITHER GOTTEN IT OR GAVE IT UP. IM O.K. WITH EITHER DECISION YOUVE MADE.

YOUVE KEPT THIS FAMILY TOGETHER, AND THAT MAKES ME PROUD. YOUR SMART, ATTRACTIVE AND FUNNY. AND YOU DONT TAKE ANY SHIT FROM ANYBODY. I LOVE YOU.

I HOPE THAT OUR DAUGHTER TURNS OUT TO BE LIKE YOU.

I GUESS ILL MAIL THIS TOMORROW, FIRST THING, SO

EVER YOURS

EVER MINE

*my dad signed it with his scribble, and wrote his name under it. under that are hearts and x’s with my mom’s name and then my name under hers.*

#very personal but where the fuck am i gonna put them? you know where i kinda cant lose them?#letters from the guy that was my dad #pt 1 #long post

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obscureoperations · 3 years

Text

Nsfw obvioulsy, I should have added this tag to the last post as well... ''Teaching Martin'' anon, this is trash and I'm sorry. I really need to brush up on my skillz. Onwards!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One of your favorite things about Saturday afternoons was that Martin had the rest of the day off. Cuda only needed him there in the morning to help process new inventory. Most of the time he left, he was in a good mood seeing as how he spent most of the time in the back away from Cuda and the other customers. He had time to himself-- time to think-- according to him he spent most of his time thinking about you. You adored that about Martin, his transparency. Since the two of you became close he had no problem telling you what was on his mind. You seemed to understand him-- really understand him. His freedom with his words only intensified once things between you became more intimate. When you thought about it you couldn't help but blush. You never would have imagined.

You spent the better part of the morning tidying up, finishing up a few errands. The two of you were going to spend the afternoon together out around town. You thought it would be a good thing, just to get him out of the house. He seemed to be in his element almost weightless as you’d walk through the park. The proverbial storm cloud would lift from his head, no longer bogged down by his self doubt-- the fear. The second he knocked on your door you bolted off the couch, deftly running your fingers through your hair.

When you opened the door he seemed almost startled, his eyes taking in your appearance. “Martin!” You exclaimed ushering him in. “You’re early.” A small smile played across his lips “He let me leave at eleven thirty.” he said as the two of you enter the kitchen. “Well that’s great, the least time around that old codger the better.” He let out a brief chuckle before stepping closer, pulling you into an embrace. He allows his head to rest on top of yours, hands soothingly roaming down your arms. “I really missed you.” He whispers, you couldn't help but smile.

“Yeah.. me too.”

You spent the next few minutes on the couch, as you went over your plans for the day. You even suggested that the two of you see a movie at five, that would kill two more hours until he had to finally go back home. For the most part he seemed to listen, offering his agreement here and there. When you finally stop talking you noticed he was watching you with an almost unreadable expression of his face. For a moment you felt embarrassed knowing full well that you sometimes tended to ramble. “Im sorry--” You laugh. “Im just going and going. Is that okay? I mean did you have any other ideas?” He smies sheepishly for a moment with a shrug, he shifts a bit inching in closer. “That sounds fine.” With a sigh of relief “Good… okay. So-- we can leave whenever you want. I already finished all my errands. Oh! And I went shopping- Did you want anything? I could fix lunch if you’d like..” He was smiling again as he reaches for your hand , gently clasping it before bringing it to his lips. “Im okay..” He whispers, before gently kissing your palm. “Thank you..” A pool of heat settles in the pit of your stomach as he begins to kiss your fingertips one by one. Drawing your pointer into his mouth sucking gently, causing you to gasp. “Martin?” He was up to something- that much was clear, He takes his time repeating the action on your other fingers. Nibbling gently, drawing them into his mouth. You found yourself leaning in closer. “What are you--” “Come here…” he whispers. You comply without hesitation wondering for a moment what happened to your beautiful shy boy. It didn’t take long for his lips to find yours, tongue delving into your willing mouth. Small content sighs as your fingernails scrape over the fabric of his shirt. He’s drawing you closer still, lips trailing along your neck. Feather soft hair tickles your collar bone causing heat to rise to your face. His teeth graze over the pulse in your neck, a soft moan escaped your throat. The sound seemed to do something to him, he’s kissing you again in earnest. Tongue melding effortlessly against yours as your fingers entwine in his hair. In a streak of boldness your fingernails scrape over his scalp-- tugging gently as your teeth sink into his bottom lip. He lets out a low moan as his fingers dig into your hips.

“Hey..” He sits back breathlessly, you can see a faint dust of color splashed across his cheeks. His lips were kiss bruised and swollen, he almost looked to be in a daze. “Hmm?” You ask kissing him sweetly for a moment. You swore, you could never grow tired of kissing him--that beautiful mouth always formed into a pout whenever they weren’t pressed against yours. He regards you through his lashes-- some of the shyness seems to have returned. ‘’ I- I wondered if I could try something?” You lean in brushing your nose across his. “What is it darling?” He chews on his lower lip for a moment, before leaning in to nuzzle your ear. The sensation of his breath sends a shiver up your spine. “Why was he being so pensive, at this point he could have whatever he wanted” His hands move to your waist, tracing lazy circles with the tips of his fingers. You could feel him breathing deeply as he sighs deeply. “I’ll show you.”

The two of you managed to make it to your room still mostly clothed, but he soon began to remedy that. It didn’t take long for the two of you to shift onto the bed, he moves to rest on top of you, kissing you deeply. All tongue over teeth as his right hand dips lower, his left, clasping yours pinning it to the bed. A soft moan escapes your lips as he moves to your front, stroking you lightly through the fabric of your panties. Your teeth dig into your lip as you suppress a shudder, hips involuntarily leaning into his touch. In slow short circles, you begin to grow impossibly heated arousal seeping through the sheer white fabric. He’s breathing deeply as he presses himself against your thigh, you hadn’t even touched him yet he was already rock hard. Soon enough he slips his fingers beneath the elastic, his moan matches your own at the initial contact.

It was something about the feel of his skin, the simple touch of his hand was enough to send you over the edge. Even before the two of you became ‘ close’ you would often find yourself staring at his hands. They were gorgeous, long delicate fingers-- sparks of electricity whenever they’d brush against you. In an innocent gesture or simply taking your hand, you often imagined just how they would feel-- Better than you imagined, the first time he’d touched you...really touched you, you came within minutes, the look of surprise on his face matched his own. He panicked at first, thinking that he might have hurt you. “Are you okay?!” leaned in to kiss him.

His lips were poised above yours, breath in sync with every roll of your hips. Breathy moans would escape here and there with the occasional praise “You feel so good…” The coil in the pit of your stomach would tighter with every small moment of relief. Careening closer and closer to the edge, he draws your attention as he calls your name. Your eyes flutter open just as he removes his hand-- a kiss his answer to your sigh of disapproval. “Martin--what?” “It’s alright..” he whispers. “ I--I wanna try it..” He finishes. Your fingers weave through his silken strands, eyes transfixed on his lips. You watch as he removes his hand now slick with your arousal, bringing them to his lips. Nothing could have prepared you for the sight of him drawing them into his mouth to the knuckles-- the moan that escaped sent another pulse to your very core. Slowly he withdraws them, tongue swirling over his fingertips before darting over your parted lips. “Please… just show me how...” He kisses you sweetly, the taste of your own arousal causes your breath to quicken. “I want to make you feel really good, okay?”

~~~~~~

His lips remained hovering inches away from your inner thigh. Another small release quakes through you causing your hand to grasp for his neck. He wastes no time pressing his lips to your clit, already hardened in anticipation. His tongue delves beneath the hood, tracing in small short circles. Your hand that grasps the bedpost threatens to turn numb, your other hand was already entangled in his hair. He remains poised there” Circles..please more circles..” He lifts his head with a lust filled sigh.

“Okay?” His lips shimmer with your delight.

“Yes perfect..” You direct his head downwards. Fingers entwined in his hair, guiding the motion of his head.

So good, he was almost too good for you, you had no idea what he needed to prove. In slow short circles, his tongue moves over your aching clit. Teeth digging into your inner thigh-- you wanted him here.

With you he was enamored, you were sure that he could easily find someone else. The sight before you was so hard to ignore… the way that he craved your instant approval. Tongue delving over your arousal, he would disappear within the next few days.

Every now and then he would lift his head “Okay?”

You’d nod in agreement, just wanting him to press forward. Hips, arching against his waiting mouth, everything was perfect.

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hyperactivelittlebee · 4 years

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Intertwined(Hermitcraft)

Notes! @gridoc Pirate AU belongs to this fantastic person! Okay so, for those reading not on the pirate au discord. (Keep in mind this info is only giant headcanon in the Pirate AU discord that Me and a few others developed on!) Mim is NPC Grian. In this AU he is a siren. His true name is Xelqua, but when he joined Doc’s crew he took on the name of Mim(A joke on Mimic because he’s a Siren who was a Mimic of Grian) And the rest of that story you can read IF YOU JOIN THE DISCORD BECAUSE ITS REALLY FUN!!~ Anyways, enjoy. TW: Descriptions of blood, violence against Sirens, Navy just being assholes, and some swearing As dark water sloshed all around him, Etho couldn't tell what was happening. One moment he was on board beside Doc- discussing plans as they left the dock- the next he was falling and drowning in the frigid, empty water. He could see the fiery red explosions of cannons going off. He could hear the muffled shouts of the others on board and gunshots ringing- bullets whizzing through the water around him. When he caught his bearings, Etho swam frantically for the surface; almost reaching it before feeling a chain snag his ankle. It dragged him down, heavy and painful making his angle burn like it was engulfed in fire. A splash was heard beside him, and before long the weight around his ankle was relieved; arms wrapping around him and dragging him to the surface. He broke the surface and ripped off his mask, gasping sharply as he gulped up the warm air. Etho swam to the beach frantically, grabbing pulling himself onto the grainy surface as he coughed and sputtered. "Etho!!" His head snapped to the voice, relieved to see familiar clear blue eyes piercing his own. The Siren was like an angel, the fire in the night outlining his true form like a halo. Mim held his face so gingerly, thumbs rubbing his cheeks with a worried expression, "M-mim- what- what happened?" His voice was shaky, still out of it, "Navy? I think- I'm not sure but whatever it is, its bad-" Etho shook his head, ears still ringing, "Shit, alright-" Mim nodded, "I will sing and lure the others I can away- you just get to Doc." Before he could respond, Mim pulled him close and kissed his lips softly, making Etho melt a bit before he pulled back, "I love you..." Something gripped at Etho's heart as he suddenly felt that separating was a bad idea- anxiety filling his gut- but he didn't listen. "I love you too." With that, Mim slipped into the water and disappeared. ___________ His sword piercing the belly of yet another Navy soldier, Etho's eyes searched the dark abyss of the water for that familiar shimmering tail. He ran to the rail, watching frantically until he recognized Mim in the water heading to the shore. Etho ran off the ship to meet him, deducing that the coast was clear. He could see Mim crawl out of the water. He could see the Navy sailor creeping up behind him. Yet His voice wasn't fast enough. "MI-" The siren looked to him, and in that moment the spear plunged into his back. The blade broke through the other side, blue blood spurting and staining the sand below, running down from the wound in thick streams. Etho watched his eyes widen in pain as a soft noise escaped his mouth. With the sickening sound of the blade being ripped out, and the sound of the Navy man sneering, he broke- everything turning red. Etho lost it. When he came to his senses, the navy soldier was barely recognizable- face bashed in with a rock that Etho didn't even know he had gotten. A pained groaned reached his ears and his attention was drawn back to Mim, eyes wide as he saw the siren lying on the beach, blood gushing from the wound in his torso. He ran to his side, frantic as he pulled Mim to him, "D-Darling?" Mim's voice was broken, leaning into Etho's hand as he cupped his face, "Yes- Yes I'm here, I'm here Mim..." Etho tried to keep his voice steady as put pressure on the wound, eyes watering, "I-it- it hur-t's-" Etho's heart broke into pieces as he gazed down at his lover, heart-clenching his pain as he tried to keep himself from breaking down, "No...No no no- You'll- You're going to be okay Mim, please..." he scooped up the small siren, holding him tight as he bolted for the ship. "Get Stress!! Please!!" Most of the crew turned from their celebration, and quickly the mood turned from joyful to solemn. Grian was the first rush over, False running to get Stress, "What happened?!" "He- He got snuck up on while shifting-" Ren ran below deck to clear a bed for them, Etho following close behind. The moment Mim was laid on the bed, in began to stain brightly with the turquoise blood, the mans heart weeping at the sight. He lent over the bed as the others rushed with supplies. "E-eth...o..." A hand cupped his face, soft as Etho began to feel warm tears slip down his face. Mim forced Etho to look at him, giving him a broken smile as blood trickled from his mouth. "It...s...Oka-y....." "No- no..." The words were breathy as Etho felt hot crimson blood slipping through his fingers, the light slowly leaving his lover's eyes. It was too much- not even yesterday he was had been gazing into the nightsky with Mim, and now his one true heart's desire was dying in his arms. "Please, you can't leave me- not yet- you promised, w-we had plans!" Stress ran down the stairs, rushing over with supplies as she nudged Etho to the side. He kneeled by Mim's face, crying as he tried to whisper sweet nothings to the other, "I love you...I love you so much Mim-" "Dancing at a ball- I-i wanted you to see beautiful lands, W-we- we wanted to get married in the summer- you wanted me to try swimming with- with dolphins and-" He whimpered quietly, "I don't w-want to be alone again..." Etho felt like a child, weeping and blabbering by his mothers side again as she bleed out of the cold wood floors. The scene so vivid in his mind- the angry shouting, the screaming on his mother as she was beat, and sobs of his father when he found her- he didn't want to be alone in these thoughts. He didn't want to be crammed in that cupboard again, watching someone rip his light from his life through a small crack in the door, frozen in fear as a meek child. It couldn't happen again. As Stress finished stitching and patching the wound, she got up and whispered something to Ren, who looked solemn. The man walked over, reaching and giving Etho’s shoulder a squeeze, "He's lost so much blood...Stress...doesn't think he'll make it-" "He will." Etho snapped, glaring at Ren, making the man falter and his ears flattened back. Without another word, he backed up and turned back to Stress, muttering quietly to her. "Et...ho...?" The pirate turned to Mim, leaning forward, "Yes?" The siren smiled softly, "Ca-can...I...ha...ve...a kiss...?" His voice was scratchy from coughing and Etho couldn't bring himself to deny the request as he leaned forward. He gently pressed his lips to Mim's gently, tears slipping down his face. When he pulled back, Mim shed one more tear. "I....l-lov....e....you..." Etho whimpered, "Xelqua..." The name was so broken and quiet as it left his lips, not yet ready to accept what was happening to his lover. His heart stopped as he watched a single breath leave his lips as he went limp. "Mim?" No response came, "Mim!!" Etho cried out in pain as he stood and shook the body, "No! NO!" He sobbed as Doc and Ren pulled him back from the body, kicking and struggling, "No! He's not dead yet!! Please!!" "Etho, its alright- he's gone, there's nothing we can do about it please-" Doc's voice was soft, heart aching at the sight of his broken friend and the siren on the bed. After a minute, Etho went limp and he sobbed- everything around him coming crashing down. "Please...I'm begging here- To whatever God is listening, Xisuma- Amusix-...please let him live...""Well that depends. Why do you want him to live?" Everyone in the room looked to a tall man in a long cloak who stood before Etho, his figure dark and imposing over them all. Without hesitation, Etho answered through sobs, "He's...I love him...I love him so much-" "Typical. But What would you do, to have him back hm?" There was a hint of amusement in the mans tone, prompting Ren to stand and draw his sword in anger, "I don't know how you got here, but I want you to leave now before I-" The man snapped his head to Ren, piercing red eyes meeting the lycans, making him freeze, "You do not scare me in the slightest, mortal." Startled, Ren backed up once more, thrown in a loop with the mans tone. He turned to Etho once more, "So?" "Anything. I would do anything..." "Even if it meant the cost of your own life?" Etho didn't need to think twice. "Yes..." The man snorted in amusement, "Then it is done." He reached toward the empty air in front of Etho before clenching his hand and pulling back firmly. Etho felt his heart tug in his chest, pain erupting as the man opened his hand to reveal a ball of red light. "This is your soul. I'm willing to make a deal with you- I'll revive him! But you must give him part of your soul. Taking your soul and giving it away will however kill you. So?" "Etho, no this- this isn't worth-" Stress began and Etho gulped, ignoring her and staring before he stood, looking the man in the eyes, "Deal." Eyes widening, the man smirked, "Then it has been done." He snapped his fingers and Etho prepared for the pain, heart racing. Pain never came. There was a soft groan and a loud gasp of air, everyone looking to the Siren as he coughed and sputtered. Etho ran beside him, embracing Mim tightly as he broke down again, "I-i..im alive?" Stress and Ren were in shock, confused as they waited for the other part of the deal to take effect. The man chuckled, looking to them, "Oh how I adore loopholes. I said giving up his whole soul would kill him- but I was only taking part~" Mim took one look at the man and gaped, "Amu? Wha...?" "I wouldn't let my best friend die on me Mim. You know this...I just wanted to test something." Amusix's eye glinted with mischief, and he turned to make his way out from the deck, "He's a keeper, Mim..." Mim glanced at the man who was sobbing into his shoulder and smiled softly, hugging him back tightly as he teared up, "Yea...he really is..."

#pirate au #pirateau #hermitshipping #npc grian #Thiswaspunishmentforpeoplemakingtoomuchangstontheservertbh

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kxhlzn · 4 years

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[iii.] the birdwatcher & his lover.

➳ synopsis: it's the summer of '89, and you discover new things about yourself— some good, and some you wish you could swallow and never see again. dealing with the newfound confusion of sexuality, you must learn the ins and outs of friendship and what it means to grow up.

➳ genre: coming-of-age drama, ANGST, fluff, slight crack.

➳ characters/pairing(s): eventual stanley uris/reader, unrequited!bev/reader, eventual benverly, eventual reddie (possibly unrequited.)

➳ wordcount: 5.9k

➳ warning(s): profanity, sexual comments, ANGST, jokes about 80s AIDS, hurt feelings, fireworks (don't try this at home, kids!)

➳ song rec: flowers in your hair by the lumineers.

➳ author's note(s): sorry i made richie cry, i hate myself too lmfao. also i love stan. that's all. that's the post. give me some recs on what you'd like to see happen to them in the future! :)

July, 1989.

the rain is constant; pattering, almost as if it expects you to open your window and let it sneak into your bedsheets, like a sneaky, horny, little teenager. except, the only teenager creeping through your window tonight is mischevious richie tozier, head full of grand ideas and schemes.

his hair is sopping when he slams on the glass, and you nearly lose ten years of your life at the scare. most of the terror racing through you isn't because you're shocked by his presence, but rather you didn't really want him to see your arms full of letters and graham crackers. he stares at you a moment, his glasses dripping with water, as a single crumb trickles onto the floor from the corner of your mouth. you consider, for a moment, that he didn't see it, but from the small smirk that appears on his lips, you know you were caught. he's crouched on the roof beside your window, tapping his knee patiently.

you don't rush to make a move, either, as you both have a staredown; richie is uncharacteristically patient, you notice, and it makes you loosen your grip on the items momentarily. but then, richie slips, and you throw them all on the bed and make a break for the window. once you've tossed it open, richie is already steady, his hands splayed out at hip height. he's preparing himself in case he slips again.

"what do you want, trashmouth?" you quip, propping the window open. you glance at the surrounding area behind him, and the sky is a deep grey. the trees are heavy with water, puddles scattered across the ground. what on earth could he need at this time?

"so, i got this cool idea," he says, gripping the sill as he slides through the crack of your window. now, he's got water dripping all over the floor, and you scowl at him as he shakes his head like a dog, flinging droplets across your bedroom. "what if we buy fireworks?"

you don't miss a beat. "what?"

"like, you know, fireworks. for fourth of july? i might know a guy."

"seriously? that'd be so cool!" you say, picturing lighting off rockets into the sky, at the quarry. richie nods in excitement, collapsing on the floor beside your bed, leaning his head against your sheets. one knee is propped up, and his arm slings comfortably on it. the water drips onto his (for once) solid color grey t-shirt and plaided black pajama pants.

"right?" richie agrees, "you can thank me later. i already told 'im to buy them. 'said he'll get back to me soon. what are those?"

you blink at him a moment, and draw your attention to where he is focused. he's eyeing the pile of letters on your bed behind him, and he starts to get grabby as he digs through them.

you jolt forward, swatting at his hands. "they're, uh... letters? to? someone?"

"your pops?"

"what? no. well, actually, most of 'em, yeah."

"he ever respond to the ones you sent last year?" richie asks softly, peering at you when you take a hesitant seat on your bed, near richie's mop of hair.

"nope," you shrug, "but it's worth a try to send some more, ya know?"

"nah. you're trying too hard, babyface. you ever think that maybe it's time to toss the towel in?" richie's hand lands on your knee, but you jerk away from him.

"toss the towel in? what the fuck, richie?" you stand, quickly, and take a few cautious steps away from him.

"no, urgh, listen. i just hate seeing you hurt yourself like this—" he stands, too, stretching his long legs in a couple strides toward you.

"what's so fucking wrong with me writing a letter to my dad?"

"it's stupid! i just think—"

"you're just pissed 'cause yours sits a room away from you, and he talks to you less than mine!" you bite, and you immediately regret it, a sour flavor sitting on your tongue.

"fuck you!" richie barks, pointing an accusatory finger at you. his voice cracks in the process. "at least my dad bothered to stay! i wasn't so fucking bitchy that he disappeared into the night, not able to deal with having me for a kid!"

you want to snap back, but you're afraid your voice will betray you, so you merely open and close your mouth like a fish. richie's shoulders are heaving, eyes blown wide enough to rival the size of his actual face, with the glasses magnifying them so much. his fists are clenching and unclenching, consistently while you stand in tense silence.

"you're right," you whisper, mostly to yourself, and you cradle your arms against your chest. you lean up against your wall and slide down until your arms hug your knees. richie gapes, mutters out a few incoherent words, and then collapses in front of you, his hands on your arms.

"no, fuck, no, i shouldn't have said that. i didn't mean it. we're both tired, and hungry, and frustrated. that was such an asshole thing for me to say," he sputters out, and he pulls your head into the crook of his neck while he coos softly.

"it's okay, i didn't mean what i said, either. i think, i just, i know you were right about the tossing in the towel thing, but i.. i just don't think i'm ready to, you know?" you mumble into his shoulder, and he nods.

"that's okay, it was just a suggestion, babyface. you want to send him a letter? fuck it, let's do it."

"okay."

you spend the next ten minutes sealing the letters up, stamping them, and tossing them into your desk drawer for later. you sit comfortably in your chair, finishing up writing the address on the last one, when richie hums to himself.

"what?" you ask, spinning around to face him. he holds a letter up from his seat on your bed, sitting crisscrossed. his magnified eyes are glued to the words.

"nothing, you just missed one. except, it's not for your pops..."

"what do you mean? i didn't write one for anyone e—..." and it dawns on you. "richie, can i have that letter, please?"

"uh, yeah, nope... 'dear beverly marsh—'"

"richie, god, please!" you fling yourself at him, and he screams, throwing his hand up so you can't reach it while you climb over him. there are a few grunts as you dig various body parts into his flesh, grabbing for the paper, but he's not having it.

"why the hell are you— ouch! —writing a letter to bev?" richie questions, shoving at you a bit to get a good look at the piece of lined paper. "is it a looove letter?"

your silence forces you both to stop your movements, and the pink on your cheeks makes richie blink a few times.

"wait..." he begins, "does that.. do you.. do you like beverly?"

"what does that even mean? 'like'? of course i like her, she's one of my best friends! why wouldn't i? she's kind, and pretty, and one of the best people i know."

"yeah, okay, but do you want to stick your hand down her pants?"

"richard tozier!"

"well, you know what i mean."

"unfortunately, yeah, i do. but... that's not.. i can't, you know, like her like that. she's a girl," you squirm, scooting over to the headboard of the bed. richie leans up next to you, his shoulder bumping yours.

"so she's a girl. if she were a dude, would you do it?" richie presses.

"do what?"

"stick your hand—"

"beep, beep, richie!"

"what i'm saying is, if she were a guy, would you like her?"

"uh, i don't know, i guess," you admit, your hands in your lap. you bite your lip.

"then what's it fucking matter?" he asks, brows curved inward, "just admit it."

you blink at him, kind of understanding where he's coming from. you suppose you never could accept how you felt because it's the 80s, and you're in derry, so same-sex relations remain strictly platonic. you wonder if others have felt, or feel, the same way you do. maybe it's not so bad. maybe you can say it out loud, to someone.

"i have a crush on beverly marsh."

it feels empowering. like you could stand on top of your roof and scream it to the entire world, make everyone know that you, a small-town girl in maine, likes another girl. it feels empowering, but also incriminating— like you have something to hide, like you should be guilty for feeling this way.

guilty of what? loving another human being?

"well, shockingly, that's not the most lesbian thing you've ever said to me," richie quips.

"beep, beep, richie."

"anyway," he clicks his tongue, desperate to change the subject, "so the fireworks. what's your game plan?"

"right. well, we'll probably have to ask bill to tell eddie's mom that they're studying. you know how she gets when me or bev call— rant about how he can't hang with us 'cause we'll force him into an orgy 'n shit," you laugh dryly.

"wouldn't mind an orgy with her," richie whistles lowly.

"her, and who else? stan's mom? she's too high-strung for that."

"with my charms? pft, please," he replies, signaling down his body.

you roll your eyes. "oh, for sure, she'll be on her knees in no time."

"nah, she'd break a hip."

you laugh. "okay, focus— so you got the fireworks, bill's got eddie's mom—" ("he'd better share!") and everyone else should be able to make it. bev and ben can sneak out, and mike is pretty much free to go wherever. i can convince stan's mom that we're spending the night at bill's, with supervision. she likes me, but i can't be sure she won't think i'm trying to fuck the jew out of him."

"he wouldn't mind."

"seriously, richie, learn when to shut the fuck up," you scold, and he laughs, "anyways— do ya think mike could scrounge up a picnic again, or should i go over to bill's to make one? i think mike would want to do it..."

"yeah," richie yawns, and he leans on your shoulder. you sigh softly, sweep his hair away from his face, and slip his glasses off, onto the bedstand. "should prolly head home."

"no, it's pouring out. you've stayed here before," you tell him, pushing him off of you so you can turn the light out. by the time you've turned yourself around, he's hogging all of the blankets and you frown. rolling your eyes, you mutter something along the lines of "didn't get to eat my graham crackers", and you stash them under your desk.

crawling beside richie, you kick him with your leg as a sign to scoot his ass over, or else. he doesn't listen at first, but another heel in his side, and he's doing as he's told. (richie won't admit it, but he likes being the little spoon); you wrap your arms around his torso and poke his back with your nose as you prepare yourself for sleep.

after a few minutes, richie turns over slightly, glancing at your face. when he is convinced you've fallen asleep, he sighs softly and bites his lip— there are so many things he wishes he could tell you. so many secrets. after hearing you admit you like bev, he feels safer; like someone can relate to him, like he's not alone. it would be the first time he ever admitted it, even to himself.

richie doesn't know you're even listening, but having you next to him makes it easier to say out loud. "okay, so uh, listen... i think.. i think i'm like you, okay? i think i like..."

he's quiet for a moment, but now you're focused; you hadn't been asleep yet, but this is odd of him. you sigh, and snuggle up against him. "eddie. it's okay."

his breath hitches, and he chokes out a "yeah". you think he's fallen asleep after, but you hear small sniffling, and you can't help but tear up too. your grip on his chest tightens, a sign that you hear him and understand. he flips his body around, and suddenly, rather aggressively, pulls you against him, his face in the crook of your neck. his small tears melt into sobs, and yours soon follow suit.

"it's okay, it's okay," you coo, combing your fingers through his hair. he sounds so hurt, so painfully heartbroken. but, so do you.

"is there something wrong with me?" richie cries, the droplets creating a pool in the skin of your neck, "with us?"

"i don't know," you reply, your shoulders shaking, "oh, god, i don't know."

how badly you wish you did; if not to ease your own pain, but most especially his. richie tozier did not deserve to be crying in your arms in the dark, because he fell in love with his best friend. he deserved a much better love story than that.

—

over cereal the next morning, you and richie don't talk much. you're both reeling from the many emotions that were expressed last night, and you're afraid if one of you speaks, it will spoil everything.

your stepfather and your mother are speaking in the other room, and you hear the pattering of footsteps — loud ones, at that, a sure one it's your stepfather — as he walks into the kitchen to pour himself a mug of coffee. he looks as dead as the two of you.

"hey, kiddo, i need you to take the trash out when you're done," he says, glancing at you. it takes him a moment to register that richie is sitting across from you. he gets an eyeful of him, and shrugs nonchalantly, "hey, rich."

"yo," richie replies, stuffing another spoonful of cereal into his mouth. the two stare at each other briefly, before your stepfather becomes bored and pads off into the other room to inform your mother of richie's presence, as she wasn't aware. you hear her nearly shriek, worried that the house isn't clean enough for guests.

"it's fine, mom, it's just richie," you raise your voice so she can hear you, "he literally doesn't care. like, at all."

she says something back, but you don't catch it, as you stand from the table and put your bowl in the sink. richie follows suit.

"so, um... i'll call bill, you handle the, you know, and then i can head over to stan's to let him know the plan. you got everyone else?" you quip, and richie smirks at you.

"you need to take the trash out, kiddo. but, yeah, i got everyone else."

"okaay," you reply, groaning.

richie leaves a few minutes after, through your window, for dramatic effect. you tell your parents he left through the second living room, a sliding door to the backyard in it. they accept it.

calling bill is easy; he always answers, (as he is always home and his parents don't care much for the phone), and rather quickly, too. it's easy to convince him, as well, as he's kind of excitable. he agrees to free eddie.

you call stanley, next. his mother picks up, and you curse to yourself. she's a hard nut to crack.

"hi, mrs. uris!" you tell her it's you, and you swear her tone becomes a bit sharper, but she stays polite. as is the way of jews.

"hello there, sweetheart."

"is stanley home?"

"yes, he is," she replies, you smile. he's always home, too, if he's not birdwatching.

"... could i speak to him?"

"oh! yes," she says, and she barks his name quietly, a sign that he was probably walking past her when you asked.

you tap your foot as there is brief movement on the other end, and stanley breathes into the phone just a millisecond before he speaks.

"hello," he says softly.

"hi, stanny! you free today? great!" you chirp cheerily, smiling against the telephone.

"o-oh, uh, yeah—"

"i thought we already established that."

"oh. um, yeah, i guess.. we have," he sounds dejected.

"kay. i'm coming over."

"what? wait, okay—"

you hang up, and hop slightly as you turn yourself around to grab your things. once you've gotten them, you head out to the place stanley calls home, a small house right outside of the synagogue.

you knock on the screen door at the back of the house and bounce on your heels as you await stanley. the locks on the door rattle briefly, and he's there, pushing open the door to let you in. you thank him and slip off your shoes in the entrance.

"so, you wanna hear about what we're doing tonight?" you say happily, poking his shoulder with a giant grin on your lips.

he swallows. "okay..."

you capture a handful of his collar, and pull him closer to you; he turns beet red. "we're gonna light off fireworks! but i gotta tell your mom we're staying at bill's."

"what? are you guys insane? that's dangerous!" stanley whisper shouts. he looks at you in complete and utter bewilderment.

"i know!" you cheer, "it'll be a blast!"

"no, i'm not doing that!"

"pleaaaase?" you beg, giving him puppy eyes, "it won't be fun without you."

he rolls his own. "no! that's ridiculous!" stanley crosses his arms, glances at your sweet face, and huffs dramatically. "ugh! fine! only because i don't want any of you doing something stupid. mostly you, because you're accident-prone."

"you know me too well, uris," you whisper sappily, and give him a strong hug. he refrains from doing it back for a second but sighs and wraps his arms around your shoulders.

"stanley!" mrs. uris calls out sharply, and she shakes her head stiffly at him. you immediately take a few cautious steps away from him. "what on earth are you doing?"

"i, uh, was just hugging her because..." he trails off slowly.

"my grandma died," you spit out.

"oh! goodness, when?" mrs. uris asks, putting down her basket of laundry.

"um—" you think of a random time, and say, "last night."

unfortunately, stanley says "this morning" simultaneously.

you glance at each other.

"last night," stanley says, "i forgot, and thought it was this morning."

"oh," mrs. uris mutters, "goodness, child, you almost had me thinking you just hug that girl for the sake of it."

"yeah, nope, i would never," he agrees, "she has like, um, ...cooties."

when the high-strung woman finally skitters away, you and stan release a breath.

you're the first to speak. "cooties, stanley? really? that was your genius idea?"

he throws his hands up in defense. "i'm sorry! it was the only thing i could think of. i couldn't say AIDS!"

"i think AIDS would have been more redeemable."

"hardly!" he exasperates, "'cause then she'd think you're a homosexual man with a sex addiction under that skirt and scrunchie!"

you break out into a fit of laughs and shove stanley's shoulder. he shoves you back, and then you're both laughing.

"what? so how am i supposed to convince her to let you come with me to bill's when she thinks my grandma just died and i have cooties?" you inquire as you both step into the main section of the house and prepare to enter the living room.

"with slow coaxing and distance."

—

somehow, all of the losers are able to come— with slow coaxing and distance.

a symphony of crickets echoes down the dirt path, matched with the small pattering of eight pairs of feet. the bugs' song drowns out eddie and richie's bickering at the front of the group, but soon, stanley's soft voice joins in. the sun has already dipped low past the horizon, coating the sky in a hazy blue-grey, but the large trees block out the color significantly. the greenery tickles at your ankles, sly weeds brushing up against you.

a few feet in front of you, stan's pearly whites sneakers kick up rocks, a thin powdery layer of dust residue sliding around the heels, and coating the sides. his laces are neatly tied, and he has taken extra care to tuck the ends away to avoid them from collecting dirt; a signature, and neurotic, move on his part. his socks are a snowy white, and nearly match the pale tone of his calf. almost as if he might turn suddenly and catch your prying eyes, you scrape them to the heavens, admiring the stars that begin to trickle into the blanket above you. you are startled as eddie shrieks, and you manage to catch a glimpse of richie waving a handful of mud from the mucky dissolve at the end of the path, which must have been created during the rainfall yesterday.

"that's literally so disgusting! no! richie, if you fling that at me, i swear to fuck—!" his voice heightens to a womanly pitch, as he withers back from richie's sopping palm. in turn, he snickers devilishly as he circles around eddie like a vulture, with stanley's disapproving expression prominent on his boyish face.

"do you realize how sick i can get from that, huh? flesh-eating bacteria can get into my fucking cornea if a rock cuts my eye!" eddie nearly wails, throwing his hands up to protect his face. richie makes inhumane sounds following eddie's spring for the opening up ahead.

bill shakes his head contently, mirrored nearly identically by beverly and mike. you glance around at the meadow, and your heart skips a beat when you catch sight of a small glow up ahead, hovering just above a patch of flowers.

you squeal and push past the others to get a closet look at the fireflies now littering the meadow. you like to catch them, but not with malice— you capture them, and let them crawl on your hands until they decide to fly again. you giggle, spinning around, arms wide open, admiring the plethora of them.

they're everywhere, and you're in your own personal utopia. richie appears next to you, and he allows a firefly to land on his finger. "hey, watch this."

you eagerly grin as he moves his other hand over the bug, and then— he crushes it, wiping the glow across his skin. you gape at him, and then scowl. "richie, you're such a dick! it was innocent!"

"yeah, but my skin glows!" he replies, showing his hand to the others. none of them are amused, as they peer at your now heartbroken expression.

"that was harsh, rich," bill says, shaking his head in disappointment.

"i thought it was cool," richie mumbles, adjusting his glasses.

you roll your eyes at his response and continue to gaze off into the dark at the glowing bugs. you manage to capture one and cup your hands as you march over to stanley.

"hey, hey, check this out," you tell him, and he cranes his neck to watch as you open your hands, and show him the lightning bug. he slowly reaches out, and it crawls onto his forefinger. "isn't he so cute?!"

"yeah, definitely," stan agrees. the glow from the bug as he raises it up to face reflects off his nose, illuminating some stray freckles on the bridge. his eyes are lit up to match, and they never leave the insect, even when it ultimately makes its flight elsewhere.

"hey, lovebirds! come help me collect some sticks! or should i wait 'til y'all are done gushing over a bug?" richie barks, raising his arms, which are full of twigs, for what you assume is a fire.

"we're not—" stanley begins, but richie is already turned away and focused on something else.

you toss stan a bashful grin. "c'mon, birdboy. 'm sure mike brought marshmallows 'n stuff for s'mores."

"wait—" stanley says suddenly, voice risen uncharacteristically as he grips your arm. when he's positive he has your full attention, he drops contact with you, and stares at the grass below. "u-um, i got you something. i-it's not like anything big, you know, just like.. i saw it, and thought of you, or, er, us."

you blink at him. "you didn't have to—"

"—no! uh, i mean, no. i wanted to," stanley replies, fishing into the pocket of his khaki capris. there, he turns over two bracelets— they're woven, some sections tan and others colorful. there are two short brown strings at the latch on both of them.

"oh, my god, stan!" you say quietly, sticking your wrist out happily. you're grinning, and you can't explain the butterflies in the pit of your stomach or the heat rising to your cheeks. "they're so cute!"

"heh, thanks," he says, stepping forward to slip the bracelet over your wrist. it feels oddly intimate. "i, uh, it's not much, but.."

"no, no, i love it," you chirp, keeping a hold of his hand while you admire the charm. your grin reaches your eyes as they rise to meet his. the feelings expressed by simply the contact of your gazes sends rushes of excitement into your bloodstream. "i'll never take it off. not once."

then stanley suddenly stares into the sky, his lower lip tucked under his teeth. his brows are now curved in concentration. "d-don't look at me like that."

"like what?"

"like this is the best present you've ever gotten. l-like this is the happiest you've ever been."

"it is," you say softly, "this bracelet means the world to me. i've never felt so cared about, not ever."

you take the second bracelet from his hand that remains stretched out, like he's offering the jewelry. you slip it onto his wrist, and use it to pull him into a warm embrace, your arms wrapped around his neck. your right hand rests on the flesh of it, a few curls brushing against your skin.

"thank you, stanley."

your entire being buzzes incessantly as he accepts your gratitude, and you pull away. the air hitting your chest leaves you chilly, the empty kind; disconnecting with him now feels like abandoning the other half of your body, and leaving it frozen in place. you feel as though without him you will always be cold. the empty kind.

richie makes short work of the fire, relaying a grand story about his survival in the woods at six years old, and his incomparable courage that winter. the flames are low and small, but no one dares tell him to stoke them or toss in some leaves for an extra shove, as he seems so content with the low burn as it is. you all subtly cuddle up next to each other, but bill is the most obvious, physically— he scowls and wraps his arms around himself while eddie is vocally unhappy.

beverly leans into ben, subconsciously, and the sweet boy glows brighter than the fire, his skin illuminating a deep red, like an apple. beverly's scarlet hair, in turn, rivals the fire as it roars. her hair, and the way it is ruffled and sharp with each sliced strand, resembles the flames as they lick up towards the sky. the reflection of the campfire makes it burn ever the more vibrant, and it melts onto the skin of her freckled shoulders and nose.

you're cut from your stupor when richie nudges you, and he whispers, "you're staring", as though you weren't already aware. the others don't catch on, fortunately, as they all listen intently to the process of shelving meat, as expressed by mike. you find it riveting, really — as riveting as the tale of processed and packaged animal flesh can be. a silence ensues once richie makes a horrible joke about vegans, and then he clears his throat awkwardly.

"so, fireworks? who dares me to blow one up eddie's ass? maybe it'll get the stick outa there," he chirps, and eddie shrieks and chucks a stick at him.

richie smirks at him and tells him to follow him so they can fetch the fireworks and eddie reluctantly agrees. they scatter off, and you watch contently as they bump shoulders. your brows draw in, a bit depressed by the two of them— how badly you wished they knew. how badly you needed them to know they were everything you dreamed to be.

while you all wait for eddie and richie, ben and beverly disappear behind the trees to go explore this stream ben had found. he told her he felt very poetic being near it, which he had hoped would signal something to her, but she hadn't noticed. in the meantime, you and stanley stay by the fire and discuss his journal, as he gushes about a ruby-throated hummingbird, and shows you a light sketch of one — he shaded the throat, and it makes you smile. he's certainly improved on his work, and you feel a rush of pride break through the dam of your chest.

"stanley, you've really been practicing," you tell him, running your index finger over the graphite lining the yellow paper, "i can tell it's a bird this time! and it's not having a heart attack!"

he nods in approval, and he takes a second to realize you were referring to the first time you met when you told him his art looked like it was having a health scare. his dull eyes blink at you momentarily, like he's trying to figure you out or understand you— and it dawns on you that he's not thinking about the drawing anymore— but rather, he's trying to understand you as a whole— as though you are some sort of puzzle he can't quite put his finger on.

stan's attention retreats back to the journal, flipping occasionally to the next page and reading the notes he's taken on each bird. when your eyes drag down his face, you feel a twinge in your stomach— there's simply something about stanley uris that you can't quite put your finger on, either, and you rather like that about him; it gives you space to unravel and discover each day. you always feel like you're learning something new and jarring about him, and you like to think that gives him depth.

however, his face holds something harsh and cold— something that remains constant, despite the circumstances of his mystery— and it's the sadness. it's the sadness and the fatigue, written like scars across every inch of flesh, a consistent tattoo of sorrow. he's imprinted with it, as though it's simply the base coat on the canvas of his life— and it hurts you, seeing him sad. and it's worse knowing that you don't think you've seen stanley uris any other way.

and you consider, briefly, just for a striking moment— that maybe he's only sad when he's looking at you.

stan recounts a conversation he had with a girl in your shared english class, persephone— known universally as percy — an introverted blonde girl, who has a curious knack for all things odd and quirky. she likes to wear lacy, flowy dresses, and unusual jewelry. she has a rather soft voice, like listening to a cloud speak— and she too enjoys birds. he says it's been a while since he's had a decent talk with someone about the animals, and that he's happy she appears genuinely interested and engaged in the topic. you aren't surprised, by this, though; you half expect percy to be some sort of angelic tree nymph.

you open your mouth to reply to his story, a bitter tang of jealousy on your tongue you don't recognize, but richie tozier beats you to it. almost to your relief.

"what's up, whores?! you ready to blow this place up?" he calls out, raising some fireworks, with exhausted eddie dragging behind him. he looks like he wants to swallow gunpowder and then a match.

you find yourself beside him, hands on his shoulders. he's too tired to even remove them. "eds, what the hell happened to you?"

his eyes are hazy. "richie thought it would be smart to go through the shit path, and now i've probably got seven diseases, at least."

richie smirks. "didn't want to go the usual way. woulda got caught by the po-po."

"you're a handful, tozier," you say.

"you love it," he replies, blowing you a kiss.

"you got me."

the rest of the night is soft chaos; richie lights off the fireworks, and they burst in bright and vibrant colors, lighting up the night. the air is crisp and free, and the grass between your toes is heavenly. you become drunk on your youth, an alcoholic in your own right. you wonder, briefly, if this is the peak— if this is the highest point of your life, if this is what you're meant for. if you're the peter pan of your successful friends, if they will all grow to be everlasting lovers and soulmates.

if this is where your journey with them ends.

and, by god, watching the way beverly looks when she's in her element, dancing barefoot with the rest of you— the way they all gaze at her like she's some sort of angel, some sort of saving grace. the way you gaze at her. how your chest aches. how it burns, to be amongst her beauty, to be jealous and insecure and in love all at once. your feet buzz with the shake of the earth, the fire in the sky. your skin sears, like ashes racing to compete. at this moment, you swear you feel your entire being burning alive.

and it is exhilarating.

and as you watch them, hooting and screaming and letting their voices be heard, you feel infinite. like the world is putty in your hands, like they are the most exhilarating people you'll ever know and you'll spend the rest of your life just settling. and your heart calms, because suddenly everything is simple; you want to hang out with these people until the end of time.

and stanley, the way his curls glow under the fireworks— the way his skin shimmers in possibility. the sadness so present in his face has faded, like he's suddenly hazy and thoughtless. his movements, they're slow and unsure, like he's seconds away from making a fool of himself. but he's beautiful— like some sort of saint— stanley is the human form of apollo, he's the sun himself. apollo— you crave that for him. and his soil eyes stray from the others and meet your excitable ones; his expression is not blank, but rather glowing. you can't define a single emotion on it, but rather a feeling. one that doesn't have a word. one that just is.

and he's looking at you like you're a goddess— you, with a crown of flowers sewn into your chaotic head of hair, you, with your flowy skirt and bare feet— and you know no one has ever looked at you like that. it sparks something in you, something luminescent and empowering. and god, he glows. that boy glows.

and it hits you both at the exact same time, like a comet striking the earth— an epiphany in the form of a human.

i want to hang out with this person until the end of time.

and maybe, you consider, just for a moment, almost a guilty thought—

he wants to hang out with you, too.

is that so bad to wish for?

a person to spend the rest of your youth with?

a person to spend the rest of your life with?

a person to call your own?

and by god, you want it to be him.

let your cries shake the earth, if it isn't.

[🌿] taglist:

@hannarudick @cedricisnotonfire @russian-romanova

#it #the losers club #stanley uris x reader #losers club x reader #beverly marsh x reader #stephen king #it 2017 #stanley uris #stan uris #it fanfiction #stanley uris imagine #beverly marsh imagine #kassie writes #BW

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riskeith · 3 years

Note

awwww i’m here now darling so you better feel amazing <33333

ok miss i see the subtle flex you just pulled on me, just say your team is op and go... :pp jk!! no but yeah if you’re stronger than the goddamn bosses it usually goes easily. can’t say i’ve seen those days in a while tho rip

YOU ARE MY BABY!!!!!! you could do a doodle for me and i’ll literally cry abt it until i die. ooooh that seems good tho??? especially ningguang and beidou... the ladies are making a comeback 🥴 i agree with you actually!! i’d love for chongyun to come back (so you can get his c6 mostly) and for selfish reasons i want razor to come back to... bc boy scouts. i really want the boy scouts... hope it happens soon tho 🥺

speaking of boy scouts i just got him.... xingqiu.. i felt so bad bc i know how much you want him... :( but i didn’t get any xiangling so. i lost successfully shskdhsk. also I WISH they had cross-server co-op more than ever at this moment bc then we could do our chongyun + xingqiu dates... 🥺

cluna you’re literally so cool! you work through them? help couldn’t be me. i get super annoyed and if it’s not working i’ll just let it go and write something else instead shskdhdksk. for instance, i was working on this fic two months ago and i got really far into it when i hit a writers block. so, its just been collecting dusts for months now. a couple days ago i accidentally stumbled upon it and realize the potential it had so i might pick it up sksjdkd. i was literally prepared to just let it rot like so many other fics i write. so yeah idk sometimes i just give up because it’s easier even if it hurts me bc i spent so much time writing them sjshdkdj. yikes.

right?? and when you write a fic that takes place during the day you can get inspired by the atmosphere outside!! and yes!! i have to study outside i can’t get anything done at home. i used to be able to do that when i was younger but now it feels sooo impossible. especially with online school and stuff. either i go to a library, cafe or school. although most of these are closed now so i have to book a room somewhere to study. do you have a specific area at home where you write or can you just sit down anywhere and study?

for sure!! if i had the space i’d absolutely consider buying more books. right now i just have them scattered around everywhere (even some in my makeup drawer shdjdh). do you have a bookshelf? 🥺 that’s so pretty...! what are some of your other favorites btw? oh grade school is basically class 1 to 9... so from 6 years old to 15? girl no worries i know how difficult it is to understand all of that. when my friends used to explain their countries school systems before i’d just sit like owl eyes.

THE ALBEDO FANART!!!!! during his quest i took sooo many screenshots god he’s just perfect. he’s such a gentle and sweet boy ughhhhh.... he’s been gone for 2 days and i already miss him. and xiao and aether are just... yeah... i love how everyone ships aether with the boys yet i don’t think i’ve ever seen lumine shipping fanart? let’s just say gay rights and leave it at that.

BEFORE I CLICKED ON THE LINK I HAD A FEELING IT WOULD BE THAT POST.... literally us!!!! don’t make one in america no worries!! idk why my acc was set to that lmao. i’ll make one in asia tonight and just hustle for a few weeks until i reach co-op (i think it was ar 15?) plus i really want aether so i’m kind of not so stressed about it tbh? god i’m actually so exciiiiiteeeeed...... 😭 you gotta promise you’ll help me with domains and bosses tho you’re gonna be at a much higher rank than me while i’ll just be a little nooby girl. 😭

thank you so much for the encouragement!!! ♥️

today i didn’t keep you waiting too long, hehe. i missed you too much. but you’re porobably asleep now though :( oh well, can’t wait to hear from you my love <333

hiya!! i’m still up bc i miscalculated the length of a fic chdjcnskjd and thought to check if you’d sent anything before i went to sleep!! made me v excited to see there was not only 1 but 2 asks from you hehe (also it’s 2am rn so apologies for any incoherence!!)

AHAHAH fjskdjskdn genuinely tho,,, i’m really happy with my team rn LOL. and noooo you’ll get there someday!! before your world level increases and you’re stuck being many levels below the bosses again fhdjdjkd it’s a cycle 😩

NFKSKDLAKS i wish i could manage even a doodle… drawing hair is literally my worst nightmare (along with drawing anything else tbh) and all the genshin charas have such complex layered hair ugh it’s like they don’t want me to even try. yass beiguang (idk if that’s their ship name) actual queens 👑. razor!!!! what a good boye. i love his idle animation so much, pls he deserves everything 🥺🥺 and you deserve to get the boy scouts!!! can’t wait for that day to come <33

AHHH!!!! no don’t feel bad i’m so happy for you omg… live out all my xingqiu-having dreams for me please 😩😩😩😩 our xingyun dates!!!! some day it’ll be a reality <333

DHJAJSHS nooooo fuck writer’s block 😤😤😤 but i hope you’re able to finish that fic now!! (vaguely, if you prefer) what’s it about? also i have plenty of fics/ideas just rotting too, but that’s usually bc i get caught up in a new idea which i like more ? i think? lmao so yeah i definitely do give up on my fics too omg wait do you have those fics where you’re like omg this concept is god tier i’m so big brained and then you write out a scene and then it’s like … wtf do i do with this now? HAHAHAH like my attention span is slowly too short to write any long af fics, i can’t stay dedicated or interested enough for that but a lot of the ideas i have have the potential to be those 300k 40 chapter slow burn etc etc so there are so many docs in my drive that are just. works with like 2-3 written scenes and an entirely fleshed out plan but i know i’ll never actually end up writing it bc of aforementioned factors lolllll. that’s another reason why i think about just releasing all my wips some day! so people can see all the ideas im unable to execute jfjsndns. do you [like] writing super long fics like that? i admire your tenacity if you do ahah

agreeeeeed <3 and oh i see!! i always feel like people who don’t study at home are so studious fjskdksk it gives off that kinda vibe for me 🤪 and i have a study! so i usually do most of my work there. sometimes tho when i get bored and if i’m not watching a lecture i’ll sit on my couch or on the floor and change things up a bit lolol

djxkkakdks omg don’t let your makeup ruin the books.. or is the makeup more important djskskks. i do have a bookshelf!! it has like… 6 levels? and it’s all full 😳😳 other faves are defs the hunger games (catching fire >>>>>>>>) and you know the others like percy jackson, divergent, the mortal instruments. oh and the maze runner!!!!!!! the prequel (? sequel???) is probably one of the recent books i’ve actually read, even tho that was like back in 2017 lmao. i liked the john green stuff too.. just a lot of the like. basic ones LMAO. hbu??

6-15??? damn that’s an interesting range djsksk i guess the closest for us would be primary school which covers ages 6-12!

albedo is legit SO prettt and for what. his hair, his eyes, his soft spoken manner. ugh 😩😩😩 and taking a bunch of screenshots is a big mood!! ooo i’ve seen some lumine ones but yeah def not a lot ! (i know there’s discourse surrounding that lmao) but yes gay rights 😤 wait that reminds me i saw the cutest razor pic the other day and saved it i’ll show you when i’m in a more awake state to attach the image fjdjnd

!!!!!! ours minds… actually connected 🧠

okay that sounds good!!! and yeah wtf why does co-op unlock so like late lol let us play together NOW 😤 and good luck with starting again!! and have fun with aether hehe we’ll be able to have both ours meet 🤪🤪 AND YES I PROMISE!!!! i’ll carry you until we’re both the same AR and we can suffer fighting bosses together <3 you can just sit back and watch me do all the work 🤪 i’m super excited too!!! 🤩🤩🤩 and thank you for doing thisss even tho i know you said you don’t mind but still!! 💗💘💝💕💓💗💞

no problem!!! i believe in you!!! ❤️❤️❤️

eagerly (but patiently) anticipating your response~ xo!

#marriage anon #wowclunaanswers #long post

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dolphin-enthusiast · 4 years

Note

why hello again my sweet morgy~!! 💞🌠🍭 what a lovely evening to wind down with some writing and a glass of wine! hopefully you are doing alright!! well, of course school is going to make our days a little worse for now, but fingers crossed that i can offer a little brightness to you 😊💞 the second day of virtual school was extremely boring, i hate having to sit at a computer for hours,, so i ended up daydreaming and playing with fidget toys and eating lollipops hehe (1/8)

"yet again, you prove to be quite the charmer my dear morgane, out here once again with all of your smooth-talking! i swear, you will be the death of me one day, killing me with kindness,, i can only wish to be such a sweet person like you!! until them, i just have to keep pulling my dumb little one liners in hope of possibly flustering you back 😘 (2/8)

and today i made the unfortunate discovery that i have my ex and lots of mean people in my classes,, and so little of my friends! this is gonna be such a hard year i suppose :( sadly all i can do is hope that this year will be better than the last,, after all, as long as i can ignore/avoid them all staring at me and making comments, i'll be okay ❤ (3/8)

i had a hard time focusing in lots of the class video calls due to anxiety, so i doodled some portraits of my teachers!! i needed the practice anyway,, i haven't drawn in a while! i sent them teach the finished sketches and they both gushed with compliments!! it really cheered me up, i'm glad i was able to make people happy with my little doodles! 💖 (4/8)

speaking of drawings, i woke up to more artwork made of me! it's so so flattering, truly!! it shocks me how some of these artists do such amazing drawings for free, they're all so talented!!! ooh, and this reminded me, i should probably tell you all that all of the art, picrews, etc that's made for me and morg is saved in a special little photo album on my phone,, i call it "things people have made for me 💕" (5/8)

i like to go through them on bad days to lift my mood, so when i always say that your efforts mean a lot to me, i'm not lying 💓 but don't fret darling, even though we do deal with a lot of trouble in our daily lives, there'll be a time in the future when we'll get away from our bothersome struggles, no? and i do look forward to that incredibly so,, (6/8)

we have all of these improvised plans building up that i'm sure we can escape from all of the stress for a good while, we just gotta hang on until then!! and i'm always here to offer endless support, love, and wholesome stuff to brighten your day when you need it! one day at a time dear, we'll work our way there 💗💗💗 (7/8̶ 9)

oh, and of course i'll cook pasta for you amore, and fresh pasta at the least!! there's so many things i have to cook for you and others, so prepare for a feast in the future! after all, i only cook for my loved ones~ 🌺 ooh, i must've glazed passed that one ask about iris by the goo goo dolls,, i just wanna throw in that i absolutely love that song and my papa and i sing it all the time!! maybe i'll post a lil singy thing of that song here... 😖 (8/9)

oh dio, it seems the time has flown too fast again,, i wish these moments could last longer!! at least i can come back tomorrow and see you again! so i bid you a goodnight dolcezza, make sure to take care of yourself! as always, i'm thinking of you 💌 - tutto d'amore, waifu xoxo 💋 ps: don't worry amato, everyone is awkward when first learning to dance (even me!), but i'm sure you'll learn fast when i teach you 💘 (9/9)"

Before anything else if yo ex trynna start shit....je suis here👁️ iS thIs gUy bOtHeriN u qUeEn??

But like i felt that on a spiritual level online claases make me absolutely bored and i almost fell asleep so many times in the past also bc my sleep schedule is fucked so unlike the times i'd get up and freshen up a little now it was like me fighting off with my own body 10 min before online class starts asmr dhshdhdhd (i also basically end up playing video games or watching anime when shit really gets boring lmao)

AnYwAYs thats so wholesome?? The fact that ppl keep makin u stuff and u saved it in a folder too🗿 which reminds me...trust me i aint this wholesome or kind really u dont give urself enough credit dear u can b very sly/smooth if u want to so its def not just me here👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️

Now i could only ever dream of having such a positive attitude as urself bc my dumbass gets thru life by ignoring and pushing down everything which is hella unhealthy but do we care n o t a t a l l ksshhx if anything im glad u keep maintaining a positive aura urself and i have to agree we have so many plans its unreal.....it just succs that life b kinda wack🤡🔪

On another note it sounds to me like we'll have to not only dance but also sing together....i have a feeling i said this before but s t i l l👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️👁️

#the confessional #once again u come for my wig and dont evem give urself credit for it s m h🤩

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oh-theatre · 4 years

Text

Objection!: Chapter 13

Chapter title: A Spooky First

A/n: Oh look! I'm not dead! And thank god that uh I planned this to come out on Halloween! I've never been so happy! In other news, I LOVE PATTON SANDERS AND THERE IS NOTHING I WOULDNT DO FOR HIM. Also, Character asks are always open and for people asking yes you can do art for this (I've gotten some asks, and IM HONORED SO IF YOU WANT OH MY PLEASE DO) Don't forget to leave me some comments!! They make my day!! And Happy Halloween!!

First | Previous | Next

words: 4300

summary: After Romans unfortunate incident, the gang still has to prepare for Halloween

pairings: Eventual logicality, eventual prinxiety, platonic demus, romantic remile

warnings: swearing, blood, hospital, passing out/fainting, poison mention

Ao3 Link

“Excuse me, would you like some Xanax? Because you are freaking out and it is freaking me out and we are all freaking the fuck out” Virgil claps, Logan turns to him huffing annoyed.

“Language!” Patton exclaims softly, they face him now the same expression plastering their face.

“Patton!” They groan in unison, he shrinks away, his eyes darting towards Romans empty bed.

“Sorry” He mumbles. He makes his way carefully towards the bed, sitting on the remains. He can hear the pair arguing behind him.

“You're telling me? To not freak out? That's like your brand!” Logan retorts, Patton clutches the bed knowing that that will only spark more of a debate. One Patton would rather not be apart of. “I'm mister can't keep my pants on and freaks out over every little thing” Logan mocks, the lawyer had never seemed so childish

“My brand? Oh, I'm sorry that I'm not ‘mister cold and frozen twenty-four-seven!’” Virgil responds, Logan scoffs. Patton shuts his eyes, feeling like a child again, except he can't escape the arguing parents, he has to get them under control. “No wonder Patton doesn't like you!” Welp there it is, Patton stands now. Now Virgil knew that wasn't true, but it sure would hurt, and that was his only aim.

“Oh I'm sorry, ‘mister oblivious towards Romans feelings’” Logan rushes, praying Patton had not heard the last part. Luckily, Logan had the same agenda, they were upset. Although by the look on Virgil's face, it didn't matter, they had really dug deep.

“Enough! Both of you!” Patton intervenes, quite angrily forcing himself between the pair. He faces Virgil first “You, will apologize to Logan about those awful things. And you will calm down, we are all very worried ok? Roman is our friend and the last thing we need to do right now is argue, understood?” He wiggles his finger in Virgil's face, the frozen detective nods.

“Yes Patton” he whispers, a little too afraid to speak. Now it's Logan's turn, Patton spins on his heel, Logan prepares himself.

“And you will apologize to Virgil, you were just as mean! He is allowed to be worried! Our friend is lying in an operation room alone, and we have no idea what's going on!” Patton takes a deep breath, steadying himself “Got it?” He questions sternly, feeling trapped between his own kids. Except they were grown adults.

“Got it” Logan mumbles shamefully. He had to admit, Patton was very good at conflict resolving. And a little scary. They bow their heads, preferring not to meet the lawyer's eyes, waiting for something to shift.

“Good, I'm going to go and get some coffee, you two” he glares “Are going to fix this and be nice to one another, you're friends, don't forget that” He reminds, Logan and Virgil glance up, locking regretful eyes. “And Lo?” Logan snaps his head towards him “I like you very much” He confirms before promptly leaving the room. Virgil notices the blush immediately, he wonders if Patton knows how much that meant.

“I am...sorry Virgil” Logan begins, going first to rid himself of the jumbled ideas in his mind. “You have every right to be worried about Roman, I shouldn't have snapped” He admits, now feeling the effects of his previous words. “And I shouldn't have said...that about your..brand” He quotes, using his fingers to mimic an air quote. Virgil holds his breath, exhaling only when Logan's shoulders fall.

“Guess it's my turn” he jokes, chuckling dryly. Logan nods, avoiding anything. “I'm sorry dude, you're just worried and I think that just freaked me out a bit cause...you're never worried” Virgil rubs his arm, squeezing it to make sure he's actually there. “And it's fine, my anxiety is usually better than…” He shrugs knowingly, Logan purses his lips.

“You have been doing better lately” Logan notes, recalling the techniques Virgil had utilized.

“I have yeah thanks” He smiles, the pace picks up, there's just one thing neither want to address. A word spoken makes it real. “Ok I'm just going to say it, I'm so sorry about what I said...about you being...and Patton and…” he's rambling now, apologies are never easy. Logan winces, Patton's face standing in the doorway, promising, assuring that he likes Logan. As if the lawyer is so desperate for confirmation. “You're not-”

“Let's not do this, shall we?” Logan interjects. His face reserved once more, Virgil curses himself, so close. “I apologize, and you apologize and that is that” He finalizes, Virgil decides not to push, too exhausted for round two. Thankfully the door opens once more, introducing a new topic. Patton returns, smiling and bright as ever, instantly Logan softens, his face morphs ever so slightly. Virgil wishes he could put Patton's energy, his essence in a bottle or something and just bring it out whenever Logan was tense, annoyed or… just needed some light.

“All happy in here?” He asks cautiously, handing the pair coffee. They share one last look before agreeing to nod, saving themselves and the hopeful figure more distress. “Yay,” He celebrates weakly, the matter of Roman still fresh in the air. As if on cue, the door slides open once more, a familiar doctor enters. You can hear the trio seize their breath.

“Judge Reial did very well during surgery” He assures, the collective sigh of relief quite audible. “They are finishing him up before rolling him back here…” Patton smiles, the doctor coughs unsure “However, I would like to...discuss what we found...during his operation” He explains, Virgil's internal alert system goes off, his eyes shift.

“What? What did you find?” He requests, wanting the information more than anything.

“I cant...well...I have to wait for the police” Patton's heart drops, tightening his grip around the coffee cup. Virgil wastes no time pulling out his badge, shoving it in the fearful doctors' face.

“No waiting required, what did you find?” He tries again, the doctors swallows, leading Virgil out of earshot.

“We believe…” He glances back at the worried lawyers “That Judge Reial was...poisoned”

~~~

“Alright kiddos, let's just settle in” Emile advises, herding the trio into the cushioned seats of a nearby diner. Remus hopped in first bouncing until he found the perfect spot, Damian followed reluctantly taking a seat next to his new friend, Valerie sat politely at the end next to Emile.

“Mister pickle can I have some fries?” Remus wonders, showing the item on the menu to Emile, his small fingers tremble as he tries to sustain the giant menu.

“Of course, but you have to get something of sustenance as well” He informs, Remus cocks his head, his little brows raise in confusion. Emile smiles weary, not sure how to continue.

“Little kids Em, you gotta use your little kid speak” Remy teases as he joins the group, kissing Emile on the head before sitting opposite him, next to Damian. The little boy waves politely receiving a ruffle of the hair in return. “You gotta eat something else with your fries little man” Remus sighs, hearing this before, Emile averts his eyes.

“Can I have chicken nuggets and fries please?” He decides, growing impatient already. Remy considers it, stroking his chin.

“Only, if you get some carrots” He offers “Take it or leave, final offer” Remus folds his arms, pouting. “Deal or no deal mister Hart?” It almost felt odd addressing anyone other than Patton as that.

“Deal!” Remus exclaims, shaking Remy's hand quite ferociously. “What are you getting?” He turns, asking Damian who is still perusing the menu.

“Mmm I don't know, Papi usually helps me” He comments, Emile pulls out his phone in remembrance, shooting a quick text to Virgil. The kids continue their conversation, finishing their orders and moving onto their colors. Damian and Remus collaborate on a drawing, using purple, yellow, green and blue to create a wonderful world. Valerie sits pleasantly chatting away with Emile, talking about her day. Remy watches, the kids so...oblivious to everything. And Emile so...happy and relaxed. Remy had to wonder what was really going on in his partner's head, he hates to admit it but sometimes it was hard to read Emile.

“Rem? Everything alright?” Emile cautions from across the table, Valerie joins her brother in his activity adding spruce of red to the mix.

“Yeah...I just-”

“Hold on, sorry, I'm getting a text” Emile checks his phone, his eyes tracing the text, Remy watches the reflection in his glasses. “Oh!” He chimes, he looks to the kids who turn their focus towards the bright figure. The twins find it comforting how much he reminds them of their dad. “We gotta eat quick! Your dad is expecting you home soon!” He tells them, Damian pouts returning to his drawing.

What about my dad?

~~~

“I feel bad for leaving Roman” Patton laments, returning home Logan by his side. He helps his fellow lawyer hang up his coat, before inviting him towards the living room. “Would you like a cup of tea? Coffee?” Patton offers from the kitchen through the window that connects to the living room.

“Tea is adequate” He responds examining the newly hung decorations, little pumpkins strewn around each carved. It was quite easy to tell which ones Patton made and which ones the twins did. Logan finishes his observations, sitting at the kitchen counter watching Patton work.

“One cup of tea!” He exclaims, placing the beverage in front of Logan. The lawyer smiles at Patton, thanking him with a nod. “Do you think V is alright?” Patton fiddles with the sugar packets laying in front of him, trying hard not to reach for his phone. He hadn't wanted to leave Virgil and Roman but it was Halloween night. Logan watches carefully,

“I think…” He starts slowly, taking Patton's hand so he stops. “That Virgil will be ok and that you…” Patton looks up, meeting Logans' eyes, only now can they see just how tired they are. “Need to focus on tonight, its good for you, a distraction. Plus, Roman needs his rest and you and Virgil need a break” Logan explains, Patton nods thankfully. The door creaks open, two scurrying feet rush in followed by a disheveled Emile.

“Papa!” “Dada!” The twins shout in unison running directly into their father's arms. Patton was noticeably happier as they made contact. They instantly began rambling about their day as Patton leads them to their room to change, Emile takes a moment to breathe.

“Heya Logan!” He greets finally noticing the lawyer, Logan turns his focus from the spot where Patton had left towards Emile. “Whatcha doing here?” He asks serving himself some tea, Logan had to wonder how many times everyone had been to Patton's house to feel comfortable enough to do as they please.

“I was invited for Halloween” he responds, Emile's smile glistens. “Where is detective Nyx, might I ask?” he references the empty spot next to the doctor.

“He’s dropping off Damian at Virgil's house” Emile clarifies, Logan nods finishing his drink. He makes his way around counter washing his dish in the sink, Patton returns a moment later.

“Well, they are off getting ready! They are much too excited for this” Patton proclaims, Emile giggles delighted for the twins. “Thank you so much for dropping them off” Patton turns to Emile, the doctor waves it off grateful to spend time with the twins.

“It was nothing, you know how much I love them” Emile admits, Patton laughs softly giving his friend a farewell hug before watching him depart. The twins emerge after a moment, Valerie first spinning around as she shows off her outfit. Logan has to commend Patton, his handiwork on the clothes was astounding. She wore a poofy top with a red sash around her, slowly going out into a short skirt with leggings. She had a fake and very dull sword by her side, and a tiara lay perfectly on her head.

“Beware! It is I! Princess warrior Valerie!” She announces swinging her sword around. Patton claps, laughing delightfully. She jumps into his arms, hugging his neck. “Thank you, papa!” She says nuzzling herself comfortably into his arms.

“Of course angel face,” Patton says kissing her on the forehead before releasing her to play. She takes a swing at Logan, he tilts his head confused but understands after a while ‘falling’ off his chair. Valerie giggles, covering her mouth as she does so. Patton sighs content, shooting a grateful glance towards the lawyer, hoping the dim lights covered his blush. Luckily he wouldn't have to know seeing as Remus joins the group soon after.

“Behold!” He pauses turning to Logan “Is that the right word?” He wonders, Logan nods proudly that Remus even listened to the man's ramblings sometimes. He resumes his position showing off his own royal outfit. The green was prominent, meshing beautifully with the dark black. As opposed to Valerie's outfit, he was messier and fluffier. He waddled around the room, showing off his outfit. Quickly tackled by his sister as the pair engage in a mock fight, careful with one another.

“Kiddos!” Patton stops them checking the time. “Ready to go?” He asks, the twins share a glance before turning back to their father and nodding ecstatically. Patton chuckles turning to the table where he left a witch hut, putting it on carefully. Logan genuinely thought that Patton couldn't get any…

“Cuter! I'm cuter!” Remus claims, he pudges his face, pursing his lips “Look!” Patton sweeps the boy off his feet, placing him comfortably in his arms.

“You're both adorable” He reassures, Remus grins holding his trick-or-treating bag steadily. Logan takes this as his cue to collect Valerie, she wastes no time jumping into his arms, causing an ‘umph’ to escape him.

“I...concur” Logan adds as Valerie stares at him with nothing but joy. They were really cute, Logan wasn't one to deny that.

“Remember we’re going to go for a little bit and then meet up with Virgil and Damian, go with them for a little while and then come home and-” The twins are ready. Disappointment should not have been what Logan felt at the mention of meeting up with Virgil.

“Movies!” Remus exclaims, squirming in his dad's arms.

“Candy!” Valerie adds, Logan chuckles at their antics. Patton nods, he leaves a bowl of candy outside with a neatly handwritten sign with the message ‘Take two! From me to you!’, he leaves the string lights on and locks the door.

“Alright, here we go” He smiles, the bustling street full of kids chattering excitedly to collect candy. Logan has to wonder what is so enticing about walking around for hours, on foot, bothering the neighbors for an unhealthy amount of sugar.

“Down! Down!” The twins chant wanting to be one with the others, Patton sighs looking around before hesitantly setting Remus down keeping a delicate grasp on his small hand. Logan follows suit holding on to Valerie's hand for safety. The twins jump and bounce around as they walk, finally deciding on a house. Remus, with a lift from Patton, rings the doorbell. They wait practically vibrating as the owner comes to the door.

“Trick or treat!” They exclaim together, holding out their custom made bags, as the door swings open. Logan and Patton smile politely at the woman as she fills up the bag, complimenting their outfits and wishing them well on their journey. The rest of the night goes similarly, the twins go from house to house filling up on candy. Slowly the quartet falls into a routine, the kids are allowed to wander freely as long as they don't go too far and Logan gets a moment to breathe.

“Having fun?” Patton inquires, his eyes fixated on the skipping twins who sing a sweet tune ahead of them. Logan sighs, the night was cool but not too bad. Patton, with the addition of his witch hat, was wrapped up cozily in a grey coat. Logan wore a darker coat, longer as well.

“I am having an enjoyable time Patton” He assures, it's quite obvious to tell Pattons nervous. But logan wasn't lying, sure there were moments where he felt uneasy or out of his comfort zone but it was enjoyable. Not having to think about the case or murders. He wonders if Patton knows how amazing it is he gets to experience this, Logan himself never got to do Halloween but this was the twins first time. Something they would remember forever and Logan got to be apart of that.

“That's good, I'm glad you're here” He admits, Logan's face feels hot almost immediately. Patton releases a quick, shaky breath, rubbing his shoulders in a fast motion. “I hope they are bundled up enough, its really quite cold” He expresses, the twins seem fine. With the amount of clothes, Patton made sure they wore, and the amount of heat they circulate by running around proves that. He blows warm air into his hands, wishing he had brought gloves.

“Here,” Logan says taking Patton's arm and linking it with his. It could be debated whether it was for more...self-indulgent reasons but Logan's body heat (As proven by research, he swears) would transfer towards Patton. He expects some kind of retaliation or resistance but Patton adjusts comfortably. Neither could tell whether the redness present on their face was due to the weather....or… ”Better?” Logan asks distracting himself from his thoughts.

“Better” Patton clutches tighter, yawning as they continue.

~~~

“Dee? I'm home!” Virgil calls out setting his things down. A moment later two figures appear, Damian, all dressed up in his wizard cloak and hat, waving around a little wand. Remy appearing behind him. “Well look at you!” Virgil admires kneeling down as his son comes pummeling towards him, wrapping his arms around his dad's neck and hugging him.

“I'm ready! I'm ready!” He dances around, Remy chuckles watching him go.

“Alright alright, how was your day?” He asks taking a coat off the rack. Remy sits at the table, pulling out his phone, no doubt sending a text to Emile.

“I had so much fun! Papi, I made a friend! And then we went out to eat! And then we came here! And I played with goo!” Damian explains, Virgil has to wonder if he already has sugar in him, the boy was never this...hyper.

“You made a friend? That's so good, I'm very proud of you” He encourages grabbing Damian's treat bag, his squiggly name inscribed under the inside flap should it ever get lost. Damian nods, trying his best to drag Virgil to the door, revving to go. “Hold on” Virgil laughs, he walks over to Remy. “Thank you so much for dropping him off” He acknowledges, Remy shakes his head waving it off

“Dude anytime, as much as I would love to stick around I gotta go, Emile and I have plans” He smiles coyly, Virgil swats his arm frowning. “Not that you weirdo, I mean actual plans” He corrects, Virgil sighs. “See ya” He dismisses himself, hugging Damian goodbye as he goes.

“Okey! Time to go” Damian decides, Virgil shakes his head chuckling, no point in delaying. He shuts the house down, putting a bowl outside with candy before starting on the street, a very tugging Damian in his hand.

“Where to first?” He asks his son, Damian points forward with no specific target in mind. Virgil shrugs and follows his son to the first house. Damian had done this last year and considered himself an expert, bouncing from house to house, until finally, they were to meet up with the others.

“Papi...carry” Damian requests, his small hands grabbing towards his dad. Virgil smiles sweetly picking him up, they walk slowly back towards the meeting spot. Virgil would have been worried about missing them but the sounds of shrieking were a pretty good clue. Emerging from a darker street Virgil walks up to them.

“Hey” He greets, Patton swivels around taking Logan with him, as Patton unlinks himself to say hello to Damian, Virgil gives Logan some much-deserved shift eyes. Receiving a glare in return. “How's the night going?” He asks handing Damian to Patton, the little boy seemingly found some extra energy. The twins join the group hugging Virgil's legs as hello, he ruffles their hair, picking up Valerie who seems more adamant to say hello.

“Good! The neighborhood is really bustling tonight” Patton replies, allowing Damian to fiddle with his glasses. Remus pouts feeling a little too short, Patton nudges Logan hopeful. Logan nods offering his own arms to Remus whos mood improves as he takes his place in Logan's grasp. Following Damian's example, he removes Logan's glasses playing with them.

“Look! I look like uncle Patton!” Damian shows, the glasses practically falling off his face. Remus giggles placing Logan's own specs on his face, Logan isn't sure whether his heart can take anymore, or if he's upset.

“I look like LoLo!” Remus decides, it's safe to say, Virgil and Patton couldn't contain their laughter. More than embarrassed, Logan takes his glasses back, desiring to see once more. Damian, bless his little hands, tries his best to place pattons glasses back on the lawyer's face, succeeding only slightly. He fixes them, smiling tightly at the little boy.

“Alright, where to next?” Patton queries. Virgil turns his focus from playing with Valerie towards Patton.

“I don't know, why don't we ask LoLo?” Virgil teases, Logan groans knowing he won't be living that down.

“I'm going home if you continue with your mockery” Logan informs. Patton smiles sweetly watching the pair. Virgil and Logan continue their exchange walking ahead, Patton follows with a sleepy Damian in hand. He releases a breath, he had tried so hard but he missed Roman. He missed the way he entertained the kids, he missed his smile, his booming voice, he missed his friend. He catches up taking his place next to Logan, his energy dulls now, he's exhausted and it finally caught up to him.

“How about a few more houses? And then we settle in for the night?” Virgil proposes, Patton yawns nodding lazily. The kids, as much as they want to have the energy to continue, enjoy the prospect of cuddling on the couch. Virgil examines the trio before laughing his words “Or maybe we just head home” He decides. And so they did, returning to Patton's home after a while. Logan, Virgil, and Patton set the now napping kids on the couch, placing a blanket over them. Patton removes the now empty candy bowl, locking the house as he returns.

“Guess they tired themselves out” Patton comments, Virgil nods stroking Damian's head from behind the couch. Logan sits on the other side, he's not sure how it happened but Remus and Valerie had found their place huddled up with Logan and he was not going to move and risk them waking up. Patton finishes cleaning up, sorting the candies into respective jars labeled for each kid. Once finished, he joins the other two in the living room, stopping himself at the sight of Logan adjusting the blanket so it fits atop both twins. He goes over leaning slightly. “You don't have to do that” He whispers, Logan shakes his head softly.

“It's alright, wouldn't want to wake them up” He lies, honestly he is quite comfortable and the image laid out in front of him is not a sore sight. Patton fights the urge to squeal and hug Logan, instead he nods making his way towards Virgil.

“Hey” Virgil greets, his voice low as he watches Damian's little breaths, his chest puffing in and out as he sleeps.

“You wanna spend the night here? I wouldn't want you to have to drive home at this hour” Patton offers, Virgil ponders for a moment, his own anxieties of intruding overlooked by pure exhaustion.

“Yeah but only if you're totally ok with it” Virgil ensures, Patton nods immediately leaving to set up the guest bedroom. Virgil cradles Damian to go and help, closing the door quietly behind him. “So...Logan staying over?” Virgil raises his voice no, not too much as to not wake his son.

“Oh! Well I don’t want to bother him and honestly, the twins love him and I don't mind having him around so...I suppose” Patton babbles, carefully crafting the bed for the pair. Virgil groans softly, Patton cocks his head.

“Oh come on Pat, go for it!” He enunciates, Patton shakes his head, face riddled with confusion. “With Logan! It's been four years...and longer technically” Virgil glares, Patton stops his grip tightening on the bedsheets, he takes a breath shutting his eyes.

“I don't want to...go through it again” He pauses sitting down, Virgil softens taking a seat next to him. “I know it's silly but...what if Logan...is exactly like Liam?” His voice is so low now, his words seize into a fearful whisper. “I just can't do that again” He slumps his shoulders rubbing furiously at his eyes, his glasses lifting as he does so, clinging to the tiniest ear.

“Logan would...never do that” Virgil hopes, he wants to say something to Patton but how does he know? In all honesty, he doesn't want to see Patton go through that again. Virgil watched Patton suffer silently for years, he knows ...hopes that Logan would never do the same but even the idea…

“I know…” He starts, he shakes his head, a squirmed breath “I know, let's just forget about it” He says standing quickly.

“Patton”

“No it's fine” he refuses to meet Virgil's eyes “I'm fine”

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