#is it really cheating if it's in the Astral Plane?

[jupitermoontarot24]

Hi guys !!! Just a quick reading for the weekend!!!! more juicy stuff otw 💗 ENJOY

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piles 1-5

Pile 1

Okay so first off I want to say you have a lot of support around you. this could be physical support but also spiritual support. I feel like you're at a period where your spirit guys are hoping you and real physical 3D as well as the astral plane. but you have Goons like if anybody messes with you they get immediate Karma I feel like also you get immediate Good Karma. So if anyone has wronged you they can be getting Karma this weekend or just in general they can be getting there from. I feel like dressing a lot better this weekend, you might get some clothes, you might buy some stuff for your house or your room. Yeah you have definitely reached Queen / King status so you're basically untouchable. I don't think this has anything to do with the weekend is just the overall energy of you. yeah you're in this nine of Cups nine of Pentacles energy. I feel like you also have a lot of options and love so you might get approached this weekend physically or online.  get for some people you could go on a date that could lead to some sexy time. This could be somebody you went to school with doesn't have to be but it could be somebody from your past or it could be somebody new. a horn beeped outside as soon as I said new so for a lot of people this will be a new person. Yes so for you this weekend all the people that have done you wrong or have passed any type of false judgment on you is getting their karma and you're getting good karma. so you'll be being handed stuff energetically and physically because the will has turned in your favor. so you could be going towards unionship this weekend, you will be getting messaged by different suitors just refilling your cup. Yeah cuz I feel like Spirit was watching the whole time and now they're like okay it's time for us to rule in the right person's favor. Overall you have a good weekend but I think this is just the reality of your life now so you just have really good support and fun. The wheel has officially turned in your favor

David Correy - Body Language

Pile 2

So you could be entering in your fairy tale ERA this weekend. so if you were dealing with an ex you could be meeting a real lover. it's kind of reminds me of pile 1 so you could have broken up with somebody or been single and you have now met someone else. this person could be your type, they good know how to work you if you know what I mean. I think it'll be really sexy too this person is rough around the edges and a good way. but they're definitely not Square or too soft, they have a very healed masculinity, take it how it resonates. Definitely read the previous pile because this could be the person you're coming into Union with. ooh and you guys could have a very adventurous night if you know what I mean. this person could have someone and I'm not going to say that they cheat but they might leave their person for you. both you guys can have options so maybe the both of you guys are talking to people casually maybe they have somebody a little bit more seriously but it doesn't matter because you guys are meant to be in Union together. yeah it's almost like Obsession upon the first link so it doesn't really matter if you were in a relationship or this person is going to happen regardless. so this person could message you, they can pop up on you but they definitely want to planning date or you guys will have a date. So it seems like if you do get with this person it's going to be very Serene and peaceful and like a fairy tale. this might be an artist of some type, finger, writer, painter. but something will definitely be changing within yourself you're definitely going to be switching timelines this weekend yeah and by you switching timelines is going to bring you to this 10 of Pentacles instead of nine. and it's going to lead you to a King. This person could have been waiting to come and see you maybe because you had so many options or something. but you definitely switch timelines and you jump into this fairy tale so fast and easy. it's like an instant.Yes like you guys can't deny each other anymore or something happens as to where they come forward. and confess their feelings. 

Chxrry22 - The Falls (Official Music Video)

Ambré - I’m Baby ft. Jvck James

Pile 3

So for you I feel like your weekend forecast involves you hanging out with one of your friends. but it's some good news is being shared so you can have really good news, if you're coming from another pile the good news could be you're coming into Union with a partner a soulmate. for some people you could be getting back with an ex  but a good x. you know who this person is so whoever popped in your mind when you thought about it, this could be a twin flame but definitely a soul man. yeah this person could message you or this could be somebody completely new. but they definitely want to have a conversation so I feel like you'll be letting your friend or  family member no. but it almost gives me like tea party Vibes so getting together and talking and being excited. There could be different emotions going on. Because of this Union you might have other suitors coming in because they feel this energetically so you might get a lot of confessions or just confessions from people who actually match your frequency. a queen of Cups could confess to you as well this weekend. yeah cuz they might see that y'all are in Union and that puts them and the energy of a race. yeah because this person will feel some type of way about it but the way they go about it is not just being sad if anything they're going to fight for you and tell you how they feel so this person will probably message you as well because they're obsessed with you and they will probably waiting outside with this person. Read pile 2 lol 

Diddy - Dirty Money - Yesterday ft. Chris Brown

Kodie Shane - Too Deep (Official Visualizer)

Pile 4

So for your weekend work as you can have somebody calling you at night. at nighttttttt SpongeBob voice lol.Someone can wake up out their sleep and call you, somebody can have a dream about you and wake up and call you. but it's specifically calling so they probably want to hear your voice it's something that triggers this person to want to speak to you physically. this could be a twin flame because they might feel your energy and they want to call you or maybe they have a dream about you something. Yeah maybe you astral project to this person or they pull you into their dreams but either way I would like to think they have a very Vivid dream about you and it's only about you and it makes them wake up and call you. maybe even in the dream they're getting told to call you and they're waking state. This person probably watches you on social media watches videos of you stuff like that. but this person could dream about like the whole time they've known you so this is somebody from your past especially it's one flame they dream of when they first met you to now almost like their life flashing before their eyes with you they probably even dream of the future too. so this person could dream of when I first met you to you guys being married and having children and stuff. if not that I think this person dreams of the first time they met you up until you guys having a physical Union in real life. so when they wake up they're like I need to have physical Union right now because I just dreamed of it and I seen how it played out. this person could have smoked or got drunk before they went to sleep and that's why it was so vivid or something. but this person definitely they might they don't have your number they might call you through I want to say FaceTime, facebook, Instagram something. I just felt real Dizzy soon as I said that so this person might start drinking right now I am doing this on a Friday so they can call you Friday night. Yeah you definitely have some history with the person so if you guys haven't been seeing other eye they want to fix it. 

Chxrry22 - Favorite Girl (Lyric Video) ft. Offset

YK Osiris - They Don't Love You

Pile 5

This reminds me of pile 4 so read that pile first lol. I feel like you will be haunting a lot of people this weekend. you can be Astro traveling to a lot of people and their waking state, and their dreams, and any nap they take you'll be there. You also could be leaving a unwanted timeline you'll be timeline jumping as you Astro travel so anything that you wanted to leave behind you have. but you're going to be invading everybody's mind. somebody could also be calling you while you're with somebody, a lot of people could be hitting you up while you're with somebody specific because everybody is going to be thinking about you. you'll definitely be put on a pedestal especially when it comes to Communications so a lot of people going to feel like they have something to say to you and they want you to hear it. so it's going to be a lot of physical calls or people trying to physically see you because they don't want to be ignored. this could have already been happening you you might notice that people have been texting you out the blue, exes have been texting you out the blue I feel like it's mostly because Mercury retrograde is over. Yeah people could be coming from the club and calling you, you could be on different time zones with people and they're calling you a different times. yeah you have a lot of suitors trying to come in and talk to you. So I feel like your forecast for the weekend will be you trying to juggle all this communication but really just go with your heart and the most stable opportunity. Could be a king of Cups involved 

Dub P - Somebody Loves You feat. Corryna (Official Music Video)

Dub P - My Love (Official Video)

[pawsitivevibe]

Getting into a new fandom and half of it is arguing about "shipping" ...

Good thing I am immune to "ship" discourse about whether a relationship in fiction is bad or unhealthy or whatever because I grew up on X-Men comics.

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for cheating on my wife with her clone?

So I (32m) recently had a baby with my wife (~1 or 32??f). We didn't end up being able to raise our son, and right around when we had to give him up, my wife (32f) showed up at our door. As it turns out, at some point within the past few years, my wife was kidnapped and cloned, and the clone had all of her original memories.

My clone wife, the mother of my child, opted to change her name and move to a different country to establish her own identity and so that I could be with my original wife.

Here's where I might be the asshole. Since my clone wife moved, I've started visiting her in the astral plane. It was just checking in on each other at first, especially since she was the only one who could understand and share my grief in losing our child, but I started to really enjoy her company in our meetings and began to re-experience romantic feelings for her.

The thing is, this is exactly what my original wife and I used to do, and when she found us in the astral plane, she wasn't happy. She accused me of emotionally cheating on her with her clone, even though it started as a way for us to comfort each other through the loss of our child and all my love for her clone comes from my love for her.

AITA?

[y-rhywbeth2]

'The god’s realm decays [when they die] and becomes nothing more than wasted land, and any proxies or similar servants left die or flee. The power itself becomes comatose and fades away to the Astral, taking on the form of a giant figure which slowly changes into crude stone. Most can easily be mistaken for huge, shapeless slabs of floating rock. 'Yet, power and energy still resides within the dead gods. It lies dormant within them, appearing only as dreams that play across their forms, and then it fades after time. Can this energy be tapped? Exploited? Some bashers think so, and have tried. Some try still. 'Since dead gods don't really die, some folks think this means that the gods can come back - that they can be revived. While this has never been known to happen, only a fool would say that it’s impossible.' - A Guide to the Astral Plane (2e)

...Other settings might have beaten them to it, I can't be certain, but I have the most horrible feeling that might make Bane the first deity (in memory) to cheat death, which is insufferable.*

...also slightly suspicious about the fact that the Throne of Blood and Bhaal's divine servants were still around when Bhaal was supposed to be dead, no longer a true god except for vestiges, and everything should've been gone, and now I'm looking back at the Dark Urge and Sceleritas somehow coming into being when Bhaal shouldn't have been able to create or sustain them and Ed Greenwood saying Abdel Adrian was conceived after the time period where Bhaal supposedly died. The Throne of Blood at least could've been forced back into being by Charname's will, at least, but the rest of it… Though if Bhaal is worshipped on other planes (which he supposedly is) then, according to realmslore, only his Torilian aspect died so, hm...

* (Considering Mystryl just jumped straight to Mystra and there was no vestige period we can consider the goddess of magic not to have died and disqualify her from counting.)

[gothyanki]

@ardentkurashk tagged me in this meme forever ago (thank you!! <3) Now it is time. Lots of yelling about Vin'ath inbound.

Name: Vin'ath

Age: 31

Race: Githyanki

Class: Paladin (Oath of Vengeance).

Alignment: Trying their hardest to be a Lawful Good True Storybook Knight while also following vengeance oath tenets to the letter. This… does not always work out well.

Deity: Having been raised in a cult, Vin is deeply and understandably suspicious of all gods. They’ve dedicated their life to their oath instead, which is totally different.

Favourite spells: Shield of Faith for practicality; Colour Spray for aesthetics. They also love smiting. Divine Smite is their fave, although they couldn’t tell you why it’s the most satisfying.

Armour (Act 1): Scale Mail of Vengeance.

Armour (Act 2): Adamantine Splint Armour.

Armour (Act 3): Still Adamantine Splint Armour! High paladin fashion.

Favourite dye: Baby blue and gold. They flat-out refused to dye their gear at all until they got to Rivington, where they grudgingly agreed to try it out. The description points to a much more militaristic meaning, but to Vin those colours have come to symbolise the sun and sky over the world they love.

(I have a LOT of feelings about the default vengeance paladin colour scheme in light of “I see only blood-red and death-black”. Vin hasn’t drifted as far from their upbringing as they’d like to think.)

Weapon (Act 1): Monster Slayer Glaive (+ anything else they could grab that looked useful).

Weapon (Act 2): Soulbreaker Greatsword.

Weapon (Act 3): Silver Sword of the Astral Plane. Sorry, Lae'zel - it's just too perfect for a githyanki paladin. (In my headcanon, Lae does end up getting it after some token face-saving resistance from Vin. They’re not comfortable with the idea of wielding a silver sword and don't really want to give up the Soulbreaker - they've still got a lot of complicated feelings about the way they won it and they feel responsible for all those whispering souls.)

Buffs: Ooh, it’s been a while - I’d have to load up the game to see what they’ve got on. Githborn Psionic Weapon? Wielding the Soulbreaker Greatsword feels so right to them (ditto for Voss' silver sword, in the very brief space of time they had it); they’ve thoroughly compartmentalised that feeling so they don’t have to think about Why.

Main love interest: Karlach. It was a bit of a rough road to get there (the touch issue might have been the least of their problems), but now they’re an unstoppable team. To hell first, then onward to the stars!

Favourite NPC(s): Vin’s got a huge soft spot for the tiefling kids, especially Mol. (They’re very protective of children in general, for reasons they won’t admit have anything to do with their own upbringing.) Meeting Varrl and Varsh Ko’kuu gave them some hope in a difficult time, even though the circumstances were painful. They also greatly admire Dame Aylin and Isobel… and kind of see them as #relationshipgoals.

…and then there’s Kith'rak Voss. Yeah, that’s a complicated one.

Favourite enemy: Kith'rak Therezzyn and Inquisitor W'wargasm W'wargaz. There was a LOT of emotional fallout after the adrenaline crash, but for a while there they were riding the high of having faced down two terrifying childhood authority figures and lived (not to mention the staring contest with Vlaakith herself…)

Favourite battle: Gortash. That one was very personal - vengeance paladin mode on full display. (The conversation after it was… significantly harder for them to deal with.) Rescuing Halsin from Orin & co. was a close second - they were just so relieved they’d got there in time.

Favourite dialogue: Is “every single dialogue involving Karlach” cheating? Not just the overtly flirty/romantic ones - Vin would happily listen to her read the Faerûnian phonebook.

Aside from that, they got so much vicarious joy out of hearing Lae'zel reject Vlaakith - they don’t tend to show much emotion, but they may have done a little fist pump at “she has sinned against me!” Also, the conversation where Wyll opened up about the circumstances of his exile - Vin felt very honoured that he trusted them enough to let them see beyond the Blade of Frontiers persona, and it led them to drop their Perfect Paladin walls a little in return.

Decision about the Absolute: Red laser destroy destroy destroy + the Crown returns to Mystra. Unlike Lykos, Vin'ath isn’t tentacle-curious.

I tag anyone who hasn’t already done this (see: forever ago) and wants to!

[eye-of-yelough]

@gaychocolatehomicide was gonna write this as a reply but it would’ve got too long.

tbh “he cheated on Lae’zel with Minthara” was a huge oversimplification. as i mentioned in my last post, he falls in some twisted kind of love with Minthara (secondhand Gortash feelings. ive said before that Gortash is like heroin to Aeryn, and if that’s the case, Minthara is methodone) pretty much At First Sight.

But then Minthara leaves the morning after, and while he misses her terribly, he’s not gonna chastise himself. He’s not even sure he’ll see her again. So when Lae’zel and Astarion make their moves, he’s not gonna say no. He will do the exact opposite, he will be so overeager it actually makes Astarion hate him a little bit. but they still fuck. because they both hate themselves. messy bitches. and he kinda gets sucked in by Lae’zel. even though it’s not how it happens in-game, (at least not with how i play) Lae’zel’s “source of bruises” scene happens before they reunite with Minthara. and he agrees because he genuinely really likes lae’zel. and then when they do reunite with Minthara literally like 6 or so hours later….

It just goes to shit. Emotional cheating all the way. thinking about her every time they have sex, confiding in her in a way he doesn’t with anyone else, keeping her permanently in his main party, the “power suits you, i killed the tieflings to impress you, i envision you in my heart as a lover” stuff while Lae’zel is like. 15 feet away. So long story short she sees it coming and the only reason she doesn’t dump his ass first is she just. doesn’t get the opportunity before they sneak off together to fuck on Ketheric’s throne 😬

as for how Minthara feels, if she comes on to you and you tell her you’re with someone, she says “you can be with me instead” like she has NO qualms about being a homewrecker lmao. as long as Aeryn breaks up with Lae’zel immediately after, so he can be hers alone, which he does. ultimately, despite the awfulness and hurt feelings, it kinda works itself out. Lae’zel is professional like that.

if that’s not awful enough for you, you’ll be happy to know that he also cheats on Minthara with Gortash like 9 days later. because he’s literally the devil. Minthara isn’t professional like Lae’zel is, that whole mess gets UGLY. but then he kills himself in Gortash’s arms in the Astral Plane and Lae’zel, Minthara and Shadowheart save the day, so. it’s not all bad.

[ladytesla]

The Great Faerun Baking Show (part four)

Hi, remember me? Wasn't in the best headspace for a bit, but now I'm gonna try and follow through with all this.

For those of you who are just stopping by, I had a horrible idea a while ago and this is the result. I have no idea what's going to happen or who's going to win. I’m just going to roll a D20 ‘bake check’ for everyone and write out the results, including what everyone rolled so y’all know I’m not cheating just so my druid boyfriend can win.  The person with the lowest total score (out of a possible score of 60) goes home.

We've got the main 6 companions, Jaheira, Halsin, Minsc (and Boo), Minthara, Dammon, and my tav Medora (who y'all can just pretend is Alfira if you don't want someone else's tav in the story, since they're both female bards)

Week One, Cake Week: Star baker was Karlach, Minthara went home

Week Two, Biscuit Week: Star baker was Halsin, Shadowheart went home

Week Three, Bread Week: Star baker was Wyll, Jaheira went home

Week Four: Pies and Tarts, or "Ammunition to Throw in Dribbles' Face"

Signature: Wellington

Astarion: Lamb wellington. It was quite dry, and the fake blood garnish was in poor taste, but it was at least edible.

Dammon: Vegetarian wellington. He miscalculated how much moisture the veggies would have, and his wellington turned out quite soggy.

Gale: Bream wellington with veggies. He tried to bring in some Waterdhavian flair to his recipe, and it worked really well for him.

Halsin: Vegan mushroom wellington. It was very badly misshapen and the puff pastry was somehow charred at one end and underbaked at the other.

Karlach: Chicken wellington with cherry sauce. The flavors were lovely and incredibly well balanced, and earned her a Hollywood Handshake.

Lae'zel: Curried monkfish wellington. The flavors were so unique and the bake was so well executed that she got a Hollywood Handshake.

Medora: Venison wellington. She got distracted by Halsin's biceps and burned it to a crisp. The oven even caught on fire, which caused more than a little panic until Gale used magic to put it out. The wellington-shaped charcoal briquet found in the oven was unable to be judged.

Minsc: Pork wellington. The puff pastry didn't puff whatsoever.

Wyll: Traditional beef wellington. The problem with classics is that you have to execute it absolutely perfectly. And he did! And got a Hollywood Handshake to boot.

Technical: 12 Egg Custard Tarts

We only had one tie this week, and scores scattered all across the board. Worst to best:

9. Lae'zel 8. Halsin 7. Karlach 6. Medora 5. Astarion 4. Dammon 3. Minsc 2. Wyll 1. Gale

Showstopper: Designer Fruit Tart

Astarion: He used all citrus fruits in his tart, which worked well with the chocolate custard he made. It was noted that he's relied on citrus and chocolate before, but the judges were hardly complaining.

Dammon: Once again the resident blacksmith has proven that he has quite the eye for detail, as his tropical fruit tart was perfectly precise and artfully decorated. He earned a Hollywood Handshake.

Gale: Created a lovely fruit mosaic tribute to his former 'friend' the Netherese Orb. Unfortunately that might have jinxed the tart, as he tripped and dropped it on the way to it being judged.

Halsin: Again, he'd harvested all the berries himself for his tart. Cloudberries, mulberries, sea buckthorn... he tried to find berries most people might not know about. The pastry case was a bit crumbly, but otherwise the presentation was lovely.

Karlach: Her tart had red fruit, red custard, and red tart dough. While the flavors were all right, the presentation was very much lacking. But as we know, Karlach is very unapologetic about presentation if something tastes good.

Lae'zel: May or may not have used fruit from the astral plane that causes hallucinations. To her credit, she didn't know said fruit causes hallucinations in istiks. The fruit provided a lovely light blue color to her presentation that hadn't been seen before, and once the judges didn't think their hands were melting anymore, they admitted it tasted quite lovely.

Medora: She started out rough this week, but managed to pull through with a tart featuring stone fruit like peaches and plums. The salted caramel drizzle on top really tied everything together.

Minsc: Noel Fielding played a joke and pretended to kidnap Boo. Enraged, Minsc instinctively threw what he had with him at the host... which unfortunately meant his tart sailed across the tent and hit Noel in the back of the head. Unfortunately, that meant said tart was unable to be judged. They both profusely apologized to each other and let Boo eat as many crumbs as he wanted, though.

Wyll: Apparently Duke Ravenguard enjoys a good fruit tart, so Wyll used all of his father's favorite fruits in the design he made. It was beautiful, and very well-balanced in flavor.

The Results:

Our star baker AGAIN this week, with a whopping 55/60, is Wyll!

And unfortunately, due to throwing a tart as well as his score of 22/60, Minsc (and Boo) have to leave the tent.

Feel free to play along in the comments! How would your tav or favorite npc compare?

Next week is Underdark Week. Have your antidotes ready.

[rockinlibrarian]

37 and 47 for the get to know the fic writer ask

Thanks for asking! Anyone else is welcome to ask from here!

37. How do you choose where to end a chapter?

I like my chapters to have a complete arc, beginning middle and end, where you can clearly say "This is the chapter where--" or "This is the chapter about--". It's, gasp, ALMOST like an outline. Don't tell me of ten years ago I've started almost-outlining! But yeah, if I know I'm writing something multichapter (and the times I didn't and I ended UP with something multichapter, the first chapter WOULD have been a complete story in and of itself already!), I'll have like a Scrivener page for each beat of the complete story, so I go in, like, "This is the 'Do Re Mi' section," and then I focus on getting that part of the story out-- so if Maria is going to start teaching music to the Hargreeves children, I need to use the beginning of the chapter to show the status quo, then show how Maria starts to play with that status quo by bringing music in, then show her efforts fully taking off and transforming the children's training and lives. What happens next is Sir Reginald's reaction to these events, but that opens up a whole new can of worms, which is why HIS reaction begins the NEXT chapter, which then becomes the chapter about Maria proving the success of her methods to him, ie "'The Lonely Goatherd' Section, In Which The Children Put on a Show." Maybe I'm cheating with this example since I'm using the beats from a movie somebody else wrote first, rather than coming up with these beats myself.

So let's look at "Exploration of the Astral Plane" instead, which has chapters helpfully titled things like "In Which Oliver Goes Dreamwalking and Gets Lost." Originally "In Which the Summerlanders Try to Host an Intervention" and "In Which Astral Walking Is the Only Solution" were supposed to be the same chapter-- In Which Oliver's Friends Know His Astral Walking Is Getting Out of Hand But They Can't Stop Him-- that wasn't the title, it was going to be the Hosting an Intervention Part-- but the story was getting too complicated as I wrote, so it became one mini-arc about them confronting Oliver and (briefly) succeeding, then a SECOND min-arc about how that brief reprieve ended.

Anyway, I'm not sure I actually answered the question. The actual END of each chapter, while completing the mini arc of the chapter, might just hint at things to come-- some foreshadowing of mood, so you get the Intervention chapter ending with Oliver sighing and saying "If only to prove to you that you’re overreacting..." so you get the sense that this really ISN'T the end. Or the Do-Re-Mi chapter, rather than hinting at anything, ends with a somewhat surprising reveal, so it's more like a punchline than foreshadowing, not in a joke way but in an adding some PUNCH way.

I don't do many straight-up cliffhangers. I guess because I like having the chapters self-contained that way.

But yeah, I've spent too long on one question, on to the next!

47. How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

Eh, I'm one of those people who revise as they go. I can't decide if this is a Bad Habit that keeps me from JUST FINISHING or if it's just the Way I Work. I lean on the former when I find myself just rereading and rereading and not writing anything new! But I also really like revising, it's really just a part of writing, so maybe that's why I do it the whole time.

I do have at least two separate drafts usually, though. When I have MOST of the chapter/story drafted-- there are usually SOME gaps, but I know basically what needs to happen in each of them-- I print it out. Then I can do a sentence-by-sentence close revision-- the change in format helps me see things I didn't before, and often helps me fill those gaps, too. After that revision gets transferred back to the computer file (sometimes with re-revisions added in process), I'm usually ready to post. But there will be additional drafts if I use a beta, which I do usually only when I'm not sure if things are flowing or fitting together properly and need an outside set of eyes to make sure it actually makes sense. (Shouting out to @steeple-sinderby and @versaphile for performing these vital functions in the past!).

So right. I'm a little verbose when I answer ask questions. But don't let that stop you asking me!

[luckywolfsbane]

Oooh, are we sending asks now? I want to ask a question!

If your ocs had only one day to live, what would they spend it doing?

Ooooo, okay, this is a tough one. I'll try to be concise. I took this literally. Like if they found out they were dying during the story. I'm making this assuming certain curses are broken, so...

Jack: Frantically plans so no one has to do anything for his funeral, burial, or anything else. This makes it so they can all grieve without making hard choices. This little fucker arranges every last detail of his funeral, including flowers. It's his final act of love, a way to take care of his people one last time. He knows he'll be reborn, so he'd decide to make sure to reincarnate asap. He makes and gives Lyris a charm that'll allow her to find his new incarnation if she wants to, so she can check on his next life or be a friend/mentor to him as he grows up. This way, she can choose what her peace will look like.

Lyris: Laughs at her impending demise because, of course, she'd have to anticipate her death rather than fall in some spontaneous blaze of glory. She's going to try to go out in a big way. She will not go quietly into that good night. She's inacting as much massive, positive change as possible before her heart stops beating. She'll take at least one power-hungry monster with her if she gets her way. If there's no massive memorial statues in her honor after she's gone, then her name will live forever in infamy, and she's good with that.

Alex: Goes fishing. I'm not kidding. He's already made peace with his end by the time he gets the news. He just smiles, passes his bear amulet to one of his best friends, and hops on a fishing boat. He's seen enough terror. His impact on the world will come from those he leaves behind. He's just looking forward to joining his previous party and his family in the underworld.

Thalia: Writes down all her secrets and final wishes/will in a locked journal and leaves instructions to find the key. Her loved ones have to go on a scavenger hunt in order to read any of it. Why not break it open, you ask? Because she embued it with her magic. If they break the lock, the pages sprout and grow, destroying the words. She does this to force her emotionally inept friends to lean on each other and accept her absence in order to honor her properly. She knows for a fact they'll do it; that's just who they are.

Roman: Cries for about an hour, then goes to Jack for help. It doesn't matter if they're in good terms, he knows he can go to him. With his help, Roman returns to his hometown to visit his mother and only remaining sister so he can be with them in his final hours. He also wants to be buried in his family's cemetery alongside his siblings and cousins. He hands Jack his personal manifesto after a full day with his last two loved ones, entrusting all his goals and final will to Jack.

Jason: Goes through the stages of grief in near perfect order in only a couple hours. He does so much in his last day, but he doesn't feel it's enough at any point. He already lost so much time, having been asleep for a decade. He cheated death once, but he can't cheat it this time. None of it feels fair. Nearing his last hours, he lands on using himself as a bargaining chip to get some sort of leg up on the BBEG--who has wanted him in their control since he woke up. Against everyone's wishes, he offers himself up in trade for something vital, kisses Jack and Lyris(everyone else gets forehead kisses), and walks into their clutches in an effort to make his death mean something. And it will. No one will let him die in vain.

(Bonus)

Felix: Takes five seconds to bask in the irony, then makes a focus object to allow him to appear in astral/spirit form in the mortal plane. He throws his mortal body back in between life and death and then moves on as a living ghost as if nothing happened.

Okay, so I really hope I don't ever have to use any of these bc they make me so sad.

I haven't deleted any asks! I'm working on the others as we speak! 💛💛💛

[leaves-reality]

2, 10, 24, and 25 for the OC asks :3

THANK YOU FOR ASKING 2. Do you have a personal favourite among your OCs? Probably Blake at this Moment! Blake is my Half-Minotaur OC because basically all my fuckin OC's are/were D&D characters. She's my 7'6" stronk farm gal and I love her dearly, and like now she has multiple continuity's because I wanted her in more stuff. She's a herbo and like i just love her very much 10. Introduce an OC with a complicated design? Ooooo, My Monstersona Meduka! She's got Pink/Magenta skin mostly, except for her forearms which are scaly and pale cyan. She's got four hands, but two of them aren't attached, they just float around her. Those ones have human skin, and she's very dodgy on if they actually are hers (they are, the ones that are attached are actually the ones that aren't). The ones attached to her arms are webbed, and designed for the water. She has Magenta Irises, and Yellow scleras. She wears a sweater dress with a heart shaped tiddy window, and a heart choker. She has purple and white tentacles for hair that hang down to right above her shoulders. I honestly wanna make more stuff with her because like she was from when I was big into reclamation of monstrous imagery, and like honestly I wanna get back into that shit. 24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why? Toughie, but I'd say either Blake or Full Screen (she's the TV headed one with the yellow jacket and black pants). Blake (specifically Blake Prime because like at this point she's basically an imaginary friend) I'd wanna see because she's just like. Really sweet, and gives the best hugs in the universe. Plus like. I can have little a simpage, as a treat. Full Screen I'd wanna meet because like she'd probably be the most interesting of my OC's to talk to, like with her experience as a shape shifting swarm of nanobot's from a cyberpunk dystopia who then like found a weird portal to like the astral plane but for the internet but also like physical and real. Plus she'd probably share some nanobots with me so I could shapeshift too. 25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?) The cheat but technically , Super ancient OC, like my fifth art I ever posted on Tumblr old, Faeth, who was just 15 year old me with goop based superpowers, but like I said a cheat answer. (So is Faith the wizard, and I also count Iuna as a cheat answer too) As far as not just "Me But..." answers, probably Lavender the Bunny clown as far as personality goes, she just like is me by 20% more clown and a bnnuy. As far as physical appearance I'd say Brya my old succubus OC since she was pretty much my body but like had pink skin, blue hair, a tail and four eyes. Which like on paper is a a lot, but like, whatever. BUT YES, THOSE ARE MY OC'S SORRY FOR WRITING A GOTDAMN ESSAY

[tsuki-sennin]

Hey there, everybody! Happy Halloween~!

Of course, our Halloween special was last episode, so we have to resort to something very scary.

Oden. The story of a certain Don Momotaro and Sonoza of Ideon in that other Toei superhero team show I'm currently obsessed with features this Japanese culinary delight prominently. This food certainly brought smiles for them, but how will it fare in this adventure with our good friends in Oishi-Na Town? With baseball apparently!

Spoilers, I guess...

-Yuin, good morning!

-Ah... your grandma made a mean Oden, huh?

-Ah, so Matsaburo-san is... not your grandpa, gotcha.

-...still a GILF.

-Kosuke-kun.

-Ohhhhhh, I see.

-Come to think of it, I don't think Takumicchi was in the Halloween episode. That must've stung, forgot to invite the poor lad.

-C'mon, hit me with the deep oden lore!

-Mari-chan is... mostly at a loss for words!

-The secret flavor.

-Oh hey, Takumicchi's home!

-100 years of intense SHEF POWER!

-I wonder if

-GINGER

-Hot damn, do ALL the people who know Takumi and his dad have history with the CooKingdom? That boy is a magnet for culinary wizardry!

-Catboy confirmed

-Ah... I see.

-Ah, here we go, the conflict of the episode!

-Wanna play ball, but gotta become shef

-Takumicchi! My man!

-...does Yuin's jersey say 13 or 15? I think it's 15?

-Awww, fairy cheers :)

-How long do you reckon it took Amane to braid all that hair?

-Damn, everybody's here!

-I believe in you, Ranchi! Koko-neechan... well, she's definitely got the spirit, at least.

-Okay, I'm gonna be quite honest, I don't know an awful lot about Japanese baseball. I know that there're several bats in OFF named after famous players, and there was this one episode of Jimmy Neutron where Jimmy invented equipment that let him and his friends cheat their way to the major league only to get turbo curbstomped in the World Series when they decide to finally play fair because they never practiced a minute of it. It was a favorite of mine when I was a kid lol

-By the way Sheen, the Japanese word for "ambulance" is "Kyūkyūsha".

-Ahhhhhh, Takumicchi! Lad's got you pegged! Quick, deny it as vehemently as you can! You can't let this youngster know you think a girl is cute! What if spilling your secret releases the goblins who hide underground eating peeled grapes and peanut butter bacon banana sandwiches, waiting for the perfect chance to make fun of a teenage boy's feelings!?

-You may not realize it, but Black-Pep is an essential part of Yuin's PreCure Polycule. The PolyCure!

-I'd just like to clarify, I just find this whole thing extremely funny and don't really have any strong opinions on romantic relationships in this season. But, y'know, there might be a war involving Yui as the centerpiece in the shipping side of the fandom that is happening in the astral plane no mortal eye can see, I wouldn't know.

-YUI LJHKM.NJM

-Girl was like "Yep, but he DOES have a girlfriend in Canada I've never seen!"

-Ahhh, 15! I was right!

-Amane's got quite the arm.

-Going above and beyond for the sake of a gal, huh Kosuke-kun? Y'know, I notice that ladies tend to not recognize these

-Get doubled, Idiot.

-Yeah okay lad, you'd take that fastball right in the face for Yuin.

-Kome-Kome comin' to catch!

-Damn, her tail is strong!

-TAKUMICCHI NO YOU DON'T DO THAT

-...well, if Kosuke's impressed then I suppose that's okay then!

-Spiritoru... you seem so dead inside, buddy.

-That was fun!

-Bagaa time!

-Baseball, borger... I wonder what kinda American cartoons he watches?

-Mata-san...

-Miss all your friends, huh Grandpa?

-I didn't expect to feel.

-I was gonna go crazy go stupid over every possible parallel between Yuin and Tarou but now I'm just really invested in this story.

-Don't know what you've got until it's gone.

-Yeah, let's go!

-Getting lectured by Takumi, you have really fallen.

-Oh fuck, we're interrupting lunch at an oden stand.

-You don't fuck with the oden, Seccy! You have officially gone too far!

-Sally forth, companions! Our delicious party festival has begun!

-Wahahahaha! Matsuri da, matsuri da!

-Curve balls! Suppose it is fitting for the baseball theme of this episode.

-Damn, Spicy's real pinned down.

-Yum-Yum do a run

-Smooth moves, Don Precious.

-Sono-Pep!

-That Precious oden!

-Hot damn, Precious bounced back real quick! Omoishiroi!

-A transcendent victory for the ages!

-Ei! Ei! Oh!

-The bonds strengthened by oden have returned to their strength!

-Yeah well have you considered paying for oden like a normal person, Seccy?

-We did it! A bond has been preserved! And just as much, a new bond has been formed with Kosuke-kun!

-Oden get.

-Donbura ko, donbura ko DON DON

Yurari yurete

Mezasu wa donna Happy End?

-Y'know, I'm kinda surprised there's not a lot of crossover fics between Donbrothers and Delicious Party. It'd kinda write itself, huh?

-...though to be fair, the Donbrothers are absolute lunatics, I'd imagine it'd be difficult for any writer to leave Oishi-Na Town in one piece after and have it feel natural.

-...y'know what, that's a fantastic challenge. I might have some ideas.

-Next episode!

-AHHHH KOKONE'S MOVING

-Feelings to share now, huh?

-Don't worry folks, Kokone's probably gonna be staying here, but that's not what the episode's all about, right? It's about her relationship with her family, that'd be wonderfully interesting.

-Alright, Happy Halloween again! Later today, I'm going to be talking Don Don Donbrothers! Not entirely sure when, but it will be before nightfall.

-If you'll pardon me, I do believe it is time for me to make my lunch~!

[pepaldi]

Dear Mr Ramis ... Harold,

I had this letter all formed out in my head but now when I sit here it’s almost all blank. I do not want to put all your legacy on just Ghostbusters though that will always be a big part of it and I know you did not mind that. That was my intro to you back in the ‘80s and of course, Ghostbusters II. Two very, very special films. (Thank You Dan.) Anyway, unlike you, I have a terrible memory so I am not sure after that how much you were in my life. When you passed in 2014 I seemed to be going through an Anxiety/Depression state. I am basing this on, silly really, that I always re blog or post at least one post on Social Media of someone I admired when the pass but from the archives there is nothing. Just a mini break.

Then of course I heard about Ghosbusters: Afterlife. I was torn from the start. I was torn even though  people seemed to love it. Two reasons, I have a weird relationship with movies (and TV shows) but also I knew you were gone and still you were part of the movie. As an very emotional person I knew I was gonna be a mess. So, I put it off. Then one day in January of this year my husband said ‘we’re were gonna watch a movie’ and that I would love it. I did not want to but he insisted and now I am so glad he did. It was a beautiful love letter to you, your family and the fans. The ending had me bawling. After that I watched the ending multiple times and cried every time.

Then, what followed was me rediscovering you and re mourning you all at once. I obsessively has since spent hours and hours searching and learning. Seeing things I had not seen in years, seeing new things but most of all discovering things about you I never knew before. Come to appreciate you on a whole new level. Not as an actor, or director, or writer (although you were good at all that) but mostly as the person you were.You had so many qualities and traits I admire deeply. Some I wish I had myself but we are all different. I wish you could teach me how to be more fearless. How to embrace things or tackle the as they come. Although I’ve gone through hardships I’m still scared of the future. I wish you could teach me how not to be. I wish you could teach me how to not overthink so much. Just to be.

It, I will admit, felt silly (not often but once or twice) to grieve so hard for someone I never knew in person but that’s what I did and still do. An online friend of mine sent me your daughter’s book. I have sneak read parts of it here and there which resulted in me crying almost every time. I do not know if I will ever be able to read it fully. Not to mention I tend to over analyze things and it bring up questions that, really, are none of my damn business. You wrote in a letter to your kids that you wouldn’t waste life. That is was a precious gift. To me, it seems you lived life fully. You did so many things. Accomplished so much. Sure, you had more to accomplish and it’s really sad that you never got to do those things. Never got to see certain future moments for your children. Never got to grow old with your wife. You did not deserve the ending you got. For someone who made so much good in the world you were cheated of the last years of your life. It is really sad to think like that but it can not be helped. The fact that you tried to keep an optimistic look on life even through your illness is just another thing I admire you for.

Knowing your personality I do not think you would want me or any of us to cry. So  when things started happening that would make me laugh out in the middle of a cry session, well I like to think it was you. Your way of saying *Don’t cry for me. I’m ok. I’m good now. Laugh with me instead.* If that was you please stick around. If it wasn’t please get your ass of whatever astral plane you are on to (please) visits me at times or (please) hear me when I talk to you. Please. I say that with so much love. I feel you were a larger than life person so in my mind not even death could keep you away or down. You are probably looking over your family and friends but do squeeze me in. I am sure other admirers of yours feel the same way.

You are so loved.

You are so missed.

Your legacy will always live on.

And you dear sweet, sweet soul, wherever you are I hope you are smiling as always.

With love and admiration,

Karin

[vasiktomis]

just woke up from a really cool nightmare feeling cheated bc right before I was about to die the murderer suddenly introduced a secondary killer like fucking game show presenter style to kill me called the Gravel Eater and it was just a normal man eating gravel and in that moment I knew my partner was grinding his teeth in the physical realm he was grinding so much it saved my life from the astral plane

[insomnia-arts]

Back on our Zexal Bullshit today, @bymyblackhand and I are watching episode 22

*sympathetic noises aimed at the Tenjo Brothers *

Sees Heartland "I hate you"

"I hate you so much, I hate you, you capitalist bastard"

"Hey Shark,...wait why are you at school?"

"Someone's gonna steal that aren't they"

"Awww"

"Aww Sharks smiling!!"

Orbital transforms "I love him"

"Of course the once sunny beautiful day is now grey and rainy"

"He loves him"

"You are a good boyfriend, Shark"

"Magical girl transformation "

About Kites photon tattoo "That has to hurt"

"A heartbeat noise when your eye is going like that is NOT a good sign"

"You dramatic little bitch"

"That's not how that works "

*looks up acid golem"

"It doesn't say anything about taking 2000 damage when it's destroyed"

.

Episode 23

"This is all Caswell's fault"

"He's making up for it being his fault"

"I do really like Mr. K"

"Poor guy"

"Barian name drop!!"

"Shouldn't you do photon transformation first?"

"Barians barians barians barians"

"A duel inside the key?"

"2 magical girl transformations"

"Yay we get to see Astrals duel disk"

"That's a weird looking hammer"

"Stop playing psychoanalyst Astral"

"Hes not like Yuuma, he hates his parents"

"Ah it's just 'photon heavy storm"

"KITTY"

"They should have brought the teacher"

*Mr. Ks virus opens the door* black hand smirks

"KATOBINGU"

.

Episode 24

"Rideeerrrrr Kiiiiick"

"Bronk smash"

"That face on Caswell there"

"How'd you gut your shoes back?"

"I bet he won't summon Galaxy Eyes just to mess with Astral"

"Orbital, you're so stupid"

"Where'd the portal go?"

"HENSHIN"

"Kite is like 'what the hell is going on?'"

*Kite asks what's going on* "EXACTLY WHAT I SAID!!"

"Shining draw!! It's time for cheating powers!"

.

Episode 25

"Why didn't the other people move?"

"That's sad, Cathy"

"Oh its a recap episode......."

"And now you're late for school"

.

Episode 26

"You should get out of the road, Yuuma"

*sees the arclights are in the theme song now*

*leaps out of chair* "TREY!! MY SON TREY!!"

"You fucking dumbass..."

"Hiiiii Shaaaarrrk!"

"He wasn't even condescending awwww "

"QUATTRO"

"Where's your cute brother?"

Me: as if Quattro knows, he don't give a fuq

"That's why he sucks!"

Me: HEY! He's my favorite Arclight!

"VETRIX"

"Doesnt he still have the mind of an adult??"

"Can't believe Nistro is only a year older than Kite...Kites trans confirmed "

*Yuuma roasts Heartland* " GOOD."

Me realizing I've spoiled too much by rambling over the years when BlackHand says "I can't wait until Heartland turns into a fly"

"Poor Caswell doesn't even have a casual outfit"

"That ball is a waste of good cards"

.

Episode 27

"CASWELL AND CATHY!"

"They made him Brittish for a reason, didn't they"

"Finally a good 'Go Go Go' pun"

*Gagaga Magician shows up in a soccer uniform*

"THEY TOOK AWAY HIS DRIP! 😡"

"You give the most bulkshit reasons for helping, Astral."

"Cathy looks weird without her glasses"

*insert rant about Striker having a soccer deck while saying he hates soccer*

"And he did it all without a number"

.

Episode 28

"Wait a minute...I've SEEN this!! When have I seen this? I've seen these 2 episodes before!! I remember the construction site and the guy has a construction deck!! This is deja vu"

Me: did you see it over my shoulder when I first watched it?

"I don't know but, I've seen this"

"Road roller da wryyy"

"Do you think the voice actors are good at playing the game since they know how it works?"

Me without even blinking because I suck and I know how it's played: No.

"I love how astrals just looking around at how the buildings made "

.

Episode 29

"Anna!"

"Why are you trying to kill him?"

"Rocks in his duel fuel?!"

*flinches when Anna punches the wall*

*Anna summons a monster*

"A TRAIN"

*a plane silhouette appears* "oh..." *followed by a closeup of a train* "Oh?" *sees it is a plane carrying a train* "Oh-wha? What?"

"A lovely attack name"

"He could break up with her"

"What fresh 'XYZ Dragon Canon' hell is this?"

"She was in love with someone else wasn't she?"

.

Episode 30

"He's like a mix between Chumley and Gong!"

"Giant park dedicated to 🍅Yuya🍅!!"

"Please tell me these are real cards"

"Does he just not like tomatoes?"

*sees a tomato breathe fire*

"OH MY GOD HE IS RELATED TO CHUMLEY"

"I forgot that in the dub they made hot sauce! Which is made of tomatoes!"

"I like how he's been winning without Utopia"

[an-aura-about-you]

I've been planning out a plated dessert based on Cuphead: The Delicious Last Course, because of course I am.

So it's been a while since plated desserts class, but I've got the basics drilled into my head to give me ideas on what to do as well as my taste in flavor profiles to guide me. If you want to make a really nice plated dessert, you want to go with roughly 3 or 4 elements to it, which I'll outline here:

-Main Dessert: this is the centerpiece of your dessert, the thing everything else should be building up to. It's the pie, the cake, the ice cream, whatever your main element is going to be. And while there are some exceptions, just about anything could be a main element.

-Secondary Dessert: this is the optional bit, the fourth, but it's worth bringing up both because the dessert I'm planning IS going to have a secondary element and because some desserts have expected secondary elements. For example, apple pie a la mode is such a standard phrase that some people believe "a la mode" means "with ice cream." If your main dessert is apple pie, the ice cream is the secondary element. Ideally, your main and secondary elements should either be complementary or have some kind of connection like a common flavor.

-Sauce: oftentimes this feels like the part restaurants cheat on, just a little something drawn on the plate to zhuzh up the dessert with minimal effort. oooo I did a Hershey's chocolate syrup drizzle on your plate before slabbing a brownie on top of it. But the sauce is a way to tie things together and push the boundaries of your flavor profiles. In desserts with two elements, the sauce needs to go with both of them.

-Garnish: this could be just about anything to finish it off. The dollop of whipped cream, the cherry on top, a chocolate cigarette, I've seen tuile cookies and macarons used this way

-And a guideline for the dessert is, ideally, each element should only incorporate at max about 3 or 4 flavors. By this I'm talking dessert elements. The sauce and garnish should either be one of the flavors set by the main and secondary desserts or be used to prop those flavors up. If you get more than 4 flavors in one dessert, it can be harder to differentiate between them. Sometimes that's the point, such as certain spice mixes where the parts make a different whole like everyone's seasonal darling Pumpkin Spice. But in that situation, I consider Pumpkin Spice to be 1 flavor, though with one that complex you probably don't want to push much beyond 2 flavors.

For Cuphead: The Delicious Last Course, I know for certain my dessert, naturally, is Chef Saltbaker's Wondertart and cookies.

I'm working on a run of the cookies tonight and tomorrow. The type of cookie isn't specified, so I'm using this as an excuse to make one of my favorites: cowboy cookies. I think they're hearty and delicious enough to knock one right into or out of the astral plane, so that's enough of a qualifier in my book. I toasted the ingredients that require toasting and the house smells so good, y'all.

For the Wondertart, I don't actually know all the ingredients for it yet. (I mean, I can look it up, but I've been watching one of my favorite Let's Player's go through the game and frankly I wanna see if I can figure it out as he plays.) But I have pulled out one of my culinary history books to get me in the mindset of the Cuphead era of food.

So, having said that, what is going on with food during the era of Cuphead?

To start with, the book I have is specifically about turning points in the history of American cuisine, which is fitting since Cuphead is a tribute to classic 1930s American animation. And what was going on around then was the last handful of years of Prohibition, the Great Depression, and the events leading up to the start of World War II. This is already giving me some ideas:

-Due to the double whammy of Prohibition and the Great Depression, fine dining restaurants were tanking, especially French restaurants which had been pretty popular at the time. But basically, if you were the kind of restaurant to have a wine list, you were in trouble.

-In fact, once the economy recovered, a lot of Americans would vacation in France for relatively cheap and part of the allure was the simple but exquisite French cuisine.

-Once World War II rationing hit, it hit sugar hard, and cheap salty snacks became much more prevalent. We're talking the rise of popcorn at movie theaters and establishing the norm of having free salty snacks at the bar so people will sit and buy more drinks.

So, this is already hitting a lot of stuff I like: French recipes, something that has to do with alcohol, and what will probably be an excuse to make some kind of salted caramel sauce since that will go well with just about anything I put out here. I might rethink my cookie choice since cowboy cookies already have chocolate, coconut, and pecan going on with them. That or I could do a chocolate ganache for my sauce instead and marry the elements that way.

Having said that, I only know two ingredients for the Wondertart so far. One of them might be getting used as more of a flavor enhancer than a star in the flavor profile, but I'll just have to see what comes up next and be ready to adapt. I don't exactly have my full basket yet, so I can't finalize a flavor profile for the tart until I do.

And as far as a garnish goes, I might do a little chocolate chess piece for the top of the tart for all the parry checks. (In fact, that'd be a fun excuse to buy some ruby chocolate since it's pink.) Well, I say that, but do I really want to temper chocolate for this? I'm not Chocolate Guy over here. Still, a little chess knight would be awfully cute. But realistically, I can't really think of a fitting garnish until I know what the tart's going to be, so I'll just have to sit tight. Or spoil myself on it.

[nerdythebard]

#12: The Doctor [Doctor Who]

Brother, I disown you...

I don't know what my friend/chosen brother was thinking when he made this request... Actually, no, I know exactly what he was thinking! Well, no time to dawdle, let's do this Time Warp. Again.

Next Time: Before we return to the gods, I want to make a character very close to my heart. He is also a Doctor... only, word of warning, he's a little... Strange.

Well then... sigh, let's see the goals we need to meet to make the most brilliant alien in television playable in D&D:

Heroes Never Die: The signature ability of a Time Lord (and the most problematic), a way to cheat death and return to life. Yes, somehow we need to make a virtually immortal character in Dungeons & Dragons...

Bunny-Ears Lawyer: Even in his relatively serious regenerations, the Doctor is prone to flashes of randomness, acts of nonsense, mixing puns and physical comedy to often hide the incredibly fast and advanced brain processes.

Go-Go Gadget Galore: Do I even need to say anything? Besides his trusty TARDIS (which will not be included here, we're making the Doctor, not his equipment!), the Doctor also brandishes sonic devices of multiple varieties, psychic paper, the thing that goes DING, etc.

---

As you can imagine, finding the right race replacement for Time Lords wasn't easy. I'm definitely not using The-Movie-That-Does-Not-Exist solution, and making the Doctor... half-human, urgh. All we need to do is find a humanoid, almost-fossil race that can come back from death a limited amount of times.

The Doctor is a Human Revenant, a playtest race from Unearthed Arcana: Gothic Heroes. In-game, Revenant is an undead that came back to life to pursue a certain goal, whether it's vengeance, retribution, or to make amends. Putting some flavour into it, and turning it into a long-living, mysterious being who perhaps came from the Astral Plane to search for a way to save his home planet... why not? Regular Revenants get only a +1 to Constitution, but if we're using pre-existing race (such as Human), there's another set of rules. So, we get a +1 Constitution and +1 Intelligence, and we don't get to pick a skill or a feat. Not yet.

What's most important here is the Revenant's Relentless Nature feature. We are assigned a goal, a very specific one, that we must complete in order to achieve peace. Work with your DM on that one (the saving-your-home-world one from before sounds like a good start). Until we complete the goal:

If we are below Hit Points Maximum, at the start of our turn we regain 1 Hit Point;

We know the distance and direction to any creature involved in our goal (perhaps a fellow, once-friend Time Lord?);

When we die, we come back to life within 24 hours with 1 Hit Point. If our body is destroyed, we come back in a spot within 1 mile of our place of death (unfortunately, our equipment is destroyed);

BOOM! JUST FLAVOUR EACH DEATH AS A CHANGE OF FACE AND PERSONALITY, AND WE HAVE THE REGENERATION SYSTEM! HAH! YOU SEE THAT, BROTHER!?

Ekhm... back to work, then.

The Doctor is pretty far from home, so giving him the Far Traveller background seems like the right approach. We gain proficiencies in Insight and Perception skills, proficiencies with one musical instrument (perhaps a recorder?)/gaming set, we learn one language of our choice, and we get the All Eyes on You feature; our mannerisms and quirks definitely draw attention towards us and our group, but we can take advantage of that in order to fish for some information, secure an audience with the local nobleman, or... I dunno, snog Madame de Pompadour?

ABILITY SCORES

No surprise there, we start with Intelligence. We have a literal Big Galaxy Brain™ and we use it often, and only sometimes to show off. Follow that up with Dexterity, we're nimble and we're doing a lot of running, especially when being chased (plus, we've invented the Drunken Giraffe dance). Constitution is next, the Gallifreyan biology is significantly superior to that of regular Terrans.

Next up, Charisma. It usually works, sometimes it doesn't, but even then we're kinda adorkable. Wisdom is a little low, I think we all shall agree to that, the Doctor is a creature of whim. He gets lost in thought, has a hard time remembering to explain his logic to others. Finally, we're dumping Strength. Now, we're definitely physically stronger than humans, I just don't remember any particular feats of super-strength in the show.

Heck, you want even more Time Lord shenanigans? Ask your DM to implement the "every death/regeneration makes all ability scores randomly switch places" rule.

CLASS

Level 1 - Artificer: Once again, nobody is surprised we begin with the Smart & Techy One™ for the Doctor. Artificers were brought to 5e via Tasha's Cauldron of Everything. These magical tinkers have d8 Hit Dice, [8 + Constitution modifier] initial Hit Points, proficiencies with light armour, medium armour, heavy armour, shields, simple weapons, and optionally firearms (although that's definitely not the Doctor's style). We additionally get proficiency with thieves' tools, tinker's tools, and one set of artisan's tools we choose. We can't get the sonic screwdriver (although if you want one, hint to your DM about the existence of the All-Purpose Tool), we have all these tools to replace it with. Our saving throws are Constitution and Intelligence, and we get to pick two class skills: let's get History and Investigation.

Artificers start with Magical Tinkering, an ability to bestow harmless magical properties onto inanimate objects. We choose a Tiny object with no magic in it, and grant it one of the following properties indefinitely:

It sheds bright light for 5 feet and dim light for an additional 5;

Whenever tapped, the object plays a recorded message no longer than six seconds;

The object continuously emits a smell or a sound of our choice;

A static image (picture, lines of text, shapes, etc.) appear on the object's surface.

Artificers are also casters, so at the first level, we get Spellcasting. Our casting ability is, of course, Intelligence and the number of spells we can prepare is equal to [our Intelligence modifier + half of our Artificer level rounded down]. We also know how to cast rituals.

We start with two cantrips:

Magic Stone lets us imbue three pebbles with magic (or perhaps, in this case, kinetic energy?) for 1 minute. We can then use the pebbles ourselves, or give them to somebody else. On a successful hit, the target suffers [1d6 + our Intelligence modifier] bludgeoning damage and the spell ends on that particular pebble.

Prestidigitation is a cantrip of plenty varieties, which very well could be disguised as the Doctor's tinkering with his sonic screwdriver. It can be used to warm or chill food, clean or soil objects, or perhaps lighting and snuffing our small flames.

We start with two 1st-level spell slots, and we get three 1st-level spells:

Alarm sets up a secured perimeter, no larger than a 20-feet cube, for 8 hours. Whenever a create not-designated as safe while setting the spell, crosses its boundary, we get a signal informing us about the intrusion, which also wakes us up if we're sleeping. The signal can be set to inform only us, or everybody around.

Detect Magic informs us of any magical activity within 30 feet of us for 10 minutes (concentration). We sense magic lingering on objects, people, as well as locations, and we can determine the type of magic present (but not a particular spell, for example, we sense that a spell on the object is enchantment-type, but not that it's Power Word: Kill).

Identify is... pretty much the one function of the sonic screwdriver we've all seen. It lets us learn about an object we choose, including its magical properties (if any) and if it's affected by any spells. And it works on wood!

With a spell list like that, we can safely say

Level 2 - Artificer: We continue with the Tech Savvy Class, and we learn the Artificer's signature skill, Infuse Item. It lets us bestow magical properties onto mundane items. Similarly to Warlock's Invocations, Artificers have Infusions they can select and put into items. Starting from this level, we can infuse two items at once, and we get to pick four Infusions from the list. For the Doctor, let's pick:

Replicate Magic Item: Bag of Holding is probably the most useful infusion in the early game. The infusion does exactly what it says, and a Bag of Holding is always a good item to own (just watch out for the Bag Man!)

Enhanced Defence infusion puts some extra protection (+1 to AC) onto an armour or a shield.

Mind Sharpener is a helping hand for any spellcaster. The infusion put onto an armour, or woven into a robe, sends a jolt to re-focus the mind. When the wearer fails a Constitution saving throw to keep their concentration, one charge (out of four) of the infusion expends, to make them succeed instead. The charges are refilled at dawn.

Returning Weapon gives a +1 to attack and damage rolls of the weapon it's applied on and makes it return to the wielder's hand immediately after it's used to make a ranged attack. With the keyword "immediately", it gives your Rangers and other bow-users infinite ammunition with just one arrow.

We can also get one more 1st-level spell: Disguise Self changes our appearance for 1 hour, or until we choose to dismiss it as an action. The spell affects our body, clothing, and items we carry (including weapons). It is not a physical disguise, just an illusion woven around us; if we make ourselves thinner than we really are, and somebody was to touch the space where our regular body would be, they're going to feel the body, albeit invisible. For the Doctor, this seems like a combination of psychic paper and the Chameleon Circuit.

Level 3 - Artificer: At this level, we get the Right Tool for the Job feature. If we have thieves' tools or artisan's tools in hand, we can create any other set of artisan's tools.

We also get to pick our subclass, our Artificer Specialization. The Doctor is no alchemist, and we'll probably build Tony Stark at some time in the future, therefore we're picking Battle Smith. Those tinkers are masters of protections, being able to put up defensive mechanisms on the spot. Since the Doctor is a diplomat first, runner second, and combatant very close and reluctant third, focusing on support is a good option.

As a Battle Smith, we gain proficiencies with smith's tools, and we gain some more magic with Battle Smith Spells:

Heroism imbues the willing creature with bravery. Until the spell ends (1 minute, concentration), the target is immune to being frightened and gains Temporary Hit Points equal to our Intelligence modifier at the start of each of their turns (AKA every six seconds). When the spell ends, any Temporary Hit Points remaining are lost.

Shield creates an invisible barrier as a reaction to getting hit. It adds +5 to our AC until the start of our next turn.

Although a reluctant fighter, the Doctor as a Battle Smith also gets the Battle Ready feature. We gain proficiency with martial weapons, and when we attack with a magic weapon, we can use our Intelligence modifier instead of Strength or Dexterity for attack and damage rolls.

Finally, Battle Smiths get the Steel Defender. With our tinkering, we create our first companion, a steel defender; it is friendly to us and our companions and obeys our commands. With that, we got ourselves the one and only K9

Level 4 - Artificer: At this level, we get our first Ability Score Improvement! However, instead of upgrading our abilities this time, we'll grab a feat. The Telepathic feat from Tasha's Cauldron of Everything will represent the Doctor's limited psychic abilities: we increase one of our non-physical abilities by 1, let's go for Intelligence. We can speak telepathically to any creature within 60 feet, but the creature cannot reply (unless they're telepathic too, of course). Finally, we can touch a Detect Thoughts spell once per long rest, without a need to expend spell slots. Give your target a good headbutt, and learn their surface thoughts.

We also get our final spell: Catapult turns one inanimate object that isn't worn or carried (and weighs from 1 to 5 pounds) and turns it into a remote projectile. The object flies in a straight line for 90 feet before losing its momentum and falling. If it hits a creature, they have to make a Dexterity saving throw or take 3d8 bludgeoning damage. Distract your pursuers with a head of cabbage flying at their heads.

Level 5 - Rogue: We say goodbye to the Artificer, as we move onto Rogue for the rest of the build. Rogues use the same Hit Dice as Artificers, so nothing really changes when it comes to our Hit Points. We already have proficiency with light armour and thieves' tools, but we can pick one class skill – let's pick Acrobatics for better running and parkour chances when escaping aliens and responsibilities.

Rogues start with Expertise, which lets us double our proficiency bonus (NOT ability modifier) for two skills of our choice: let's boost Insight and History, to best utilize our centuries of living. We also learn how to speak Thieves' Cant, a special system of phrases and signals used by other Rogues to communicate without revealing their secrets. Finally, we have Sneak Attack: once per turn we can add 1d6 extra damage if a) we have an advantage on our roll, or b) the target is within 5 feet of another creature hostile towards it. The attack must be done by either a ranged weapon or one with the finesse property (like a dagger or a rapier).

Level 6 - Rogue: We get Cunning Action, which let us turn some Actions we can do in combat into Bonus Actions. That way, we still have an Action to spare if we decide to use Dash, Disengage, or Hide. Considering how much running the Doctor does, it's good to have something else to do just in case.

Level 7 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack changes to 2d6.

We also get to pick our second subclass, our Roguish Archetype. Now, initially, I considered going Swashbuckler, as it combines nimble footwork and gives us some charm abilities. However, since we're going with the build that emphasizes support and actual combat as a last resort, we'll go with Inquisitive.

We start this subclass with Ear for Deceit, whenever we roll Insight checks to determine if a creature is lying to us, we treat each roll of 7 or lower as 8.

We also get Eye for Detail. This is mostly to be used in combat (or if your DM runs dungeons in Initiative Mode), as it allows us to use Perception or Investigation checks as a bonus action, where it would normally take an action.

Finally, Inquisitive Rogues get Insightful Fighting. As a bonus action, we can make an Insight check, contested by the enemy's Deception check. If we succeed, for 1 minute we can use our Sneak Attack on the target even if we don't have an advantage or the target isn't near another of its enemies.

Level 8 - Rogue: Time for another ASI! Let's raise our Intelligence by 1 point, and use the spare one for Strength.

Level 9 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack changes to 3d6.

We also get Uncanny Dodge. Whenever we're being hit by an attack, we can use our reaction to halve the damage dealt.

Level 10 - Rogue: Halfway through the build, and we get another shot at Expertise. Once again, we get two skills to which we can double our proficiency bonus. Let's go with Perception and Investigation.

Level 11 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 4d6.

We also get one of the better abilities in the game, Evasion. If we're being targeted by an AoE attack that would deal half damage on a successful Dexterity saving throw, we take no damage if we make the save. What that means is, we can now take a Fireball face-on, shrug it off and loudly proclaim

Level 12 - Rogue: We get another ASI. Let's improve our Dexterity by two points this time.

Level 13 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 5d6.

We also get another subclass feature. Steady Eye gives us an advantage on Perception or Investigation checks if we move no more than half of our movement speed on our turn.

Level 14 - Rogue: Time for another ASI. Let's focus on getting some more Hit Points this time, and get +2 points to Constitution.

Level 15 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 6d6.

At this level, we get Reliable Talent, which upgrades our abilities to almost anime protagonist-level. Whenever we make a check for a skill we're proficient in, we treat all rolls of 9 and lower as 10.

Level 16 - Rogue: We're getting one more ASI. Let's raise our Dexterity again, putting 2 points in it.

Level 17 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 7d6.

We get our final subclass upgrade for this build, the Unerring Eye. We can now sense illusions and magical tricks within 30 feet, as well as shapechangers not in their original form. We can detect there is an effect trying to trick our senses around us, but we don't know its nature (i.e. if we meet a creature that activates our sense, we cannot distinguish whether it's a Disguise Self spell, or a natural shapeshifting ability, or a Druid's Wild Shape).

Level 18 - Rogue: We get another one of the best abilities in the game, Blindsense. We can now detect the presence of invisible and hidden creatures within 10 feet radius of us.

Level 19 - Rogue: Our Sneak Attack becomes 8d6.

Our mind becomes more slippery with Slippery Mind. We gain proficiency in Wisdom saving throws.

Level 20 - Rogue: Our build's capstone is Rogue 16, which is also our final ASI. Let's finally cap Intelligence, as it should've been from the start when it comes to Time Lords.

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There it is. My take on how to play as the Doctor in Dungeons & Dragons. I believe I've covered most if not all of the important features the Doctor has, but let's see:

Let's face it, we're not a frontline fighter... we're not even a backline fighter. We support. With 14 AC (without armour), 151 Hit Points on average, and a +4 to Initiative, our job is to manoeuvre, around the battlefield and let our friends take care of the enemy, while we do other things. With Reliable Talent and Expertise we are great at sweeping the room for clues and hints, even if in the heat of battle. Thanks to Unerring Eye and Blindsense, our senses aren't that easy to fool.

Unfortunately, our Strength is not great, and that means some weapons are just a hindrance (unless we pick a finesse weapon, which replaces Strength with Dexterity). While we have late-game proficiency in Wisdom saving throws, throughout the earlier stages those might prove a little problem.

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And that is it for this build. I hope that you guys enjoyed it, and I'll see you for the next one!

- Nerdy out!