#it looks funny right? you think it looks funny. i do too but it lives its whole life

[musaslullaby]

Is the princess really getting married?

Charles leclerc x fem reader

Summary: The Princess of Monaco is getting married, but the fans don't know who the lucky one is.

Face: people on Pinterest, and the driver.

Warning: fluff, Instagram AU.

A/N: There will be a second part.

Masterlist

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Ynofficial

Description: Me every time they tell me I should go get ready.

Liked by user56, lewishaamilton, and other 948.983.

user43: Yn doesn’t want to be a princess anymore.

user32: Let’s switch places, girl. ❤️ Like to author

yourbrother: Yn, you shouldn’t post these things.

Ynofficial: Don’t be so strict.

yourbrother: I’m just trying to keep you on the right track.

Ynofficial: How boring.

user3: The best princess I’ve ever seen.

user12: This is too funny.

user34: POV: How to pretend not to be a princess.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: POV: It’s not a POV.

user34: YNNNN!!!!

Ynofficial: Yes, that’s my name.

yourbrother: What am I going to do with you? ❤️ Like to author

user78: What do you have to do today?

Ynofficial: Another one of those shoots for something, honestly, I don’t even know.

user23: Wait, you’re doing a photoshoot and you don’t even know what for?

Ynofficial: Exactly.

Ynofficial

Description: At least I have him to keep me company.

Liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, and other 8.483.939.

user45: How cuteeee.

user67: The luckiest little dog in the world.

user221: Yn doesn’t need a boyfriend; she has her dog.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: I totally agree.

yourbrother: He’s the only one who deserves to live in the palace.

Ynofficial: I know you love my son more than me, thanks.

yourbrother: I never said that.

Ynofficial: So, you love me?

yourbrother: You trapped me. ❤️ Like to author

user21: The last photo is worthy of a queen.

user34: Maybe you meant goddess?

user56: Guys, doesn’t that dog look like Leclerc’s dog?

user7: Who’s Leclerc?

f1lover: How can you not know? He’s a god on earth.

user90: He’s an F1 driver who has a dog of the same breed named Leo.

user50: Now that I think about it, they adopted them around the same time.

user54: Coincidence?

Ynofficial

Description: Okay, okay, I have to admit I had fun this time.

Liked by user43, checoperez, and other 98,453.

yourbrother: I told you.

Ynofficial: You usually tell a lot of lies.

user45: I love the relationship between Yn and her brother.

❤️ Like to author

user6: The heir to the Monaco throne.

user7: He’s very kind, I met him.

Ynofficial: Try living with him, then we’ll see.

user21: Were the jewels real?

Ynofficial: Yes, and they’re really heavy too.

user6: I wouldn’t want to be in your shoes.

Ynofficial: The clothes are super uncomfortable tooooo.

user67: But they’re beautiful.

user0: They look amazing on her.

Ynofficial: I can’t wait to take them off.

Ynofficial

Description: A date before saying goodbye.

Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 4.784.839.

user21: Who are you with, girl?

Ynofficial: With a human being.

user6: The luckiest human in the world. ❤️ Like to author

user5: YN OF MONACO WHAT ARE YOU DOING??

user34: Thank you, Yn.

user1: Whoever it is should thank their lucky stars every day to be with someone like Yn.

❤️ Like to author

user45: So, is she engaged??

user41: Yn, don’t play these tricks on us.

user67: It’s not funny.

user3: I love the dress.

Ynofficial: I don’t, they forced me to wear it.

user56: No way we could afford it.

user32: I wish I were a princess.

Ynofficial: Wish granted, please come take my place.

user6: Guys, isn’t the Monaco GP today?

user5: Oh God, you’re right.

user43: Do you think she’s going to the GP?

user8: I didn’t know she was into F1.

user09: Neither did I.

user5: Yn is the black sheep of the family.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: You’re absolutely right.

user56: That description doesn’t sound like you.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: Sorry, too poetic.

yourbrother: Mom wants to talk to you.

user6: Trouble’s coming.

Ynofficial: Time to run off to Mexico. Checo, will you host me?

checoperez: Whenever you want. ❤️ Like to author

user32: Wait, they know each other???

user9: Did I miss something?

user78: What does this dialogue even mean?

user76: YN?

Ynofficial

Description: Guess who’s not supposed to be wandering around the paddock?

Liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and other 877.473.738.

gp1: YN OF MONACO.

vroom: Wait, they allowed her to go to the GP??

race: I think at least someone from the royal family always has to be there?

user43: YN, DID YOU MEET CHARLES?

Ynofficial: 🤫🤫.

16_55: IT’S A YESSS.

user2: MY TWO FAVORITE PEOPLE MEETING. ❤️ Like to author

yourbrother: Where did you go? Mom’s going to be very angry.

Ynofficial: Cover for me.

yourbrother: Wait, what?

Ynofficial: Thanks, love you.

yourbrother: No, Yn, come back here, we agreed to stay low-key.

Ynofficial: No one will see me.

yourbrother: That includes me too, right?

Ynofficial: Maybe yes, maybe no.

63_: I love this woman.

user42: Is the car comfortable?

Ynofficial: My princess ass didn’t appreciate it.

user21_: That’s why you’re my favorite princess.

Ynofficial: I don’t think you know any others.

danielricciardo: Princess Yn is a fan of mine.

Ynofficial: You’re my childhood.

danielricciardo: I’m not that old.

Ynofficial: Don’t worry, Daniel, it’s hard to accept.

landonorris: Wait, Daniel met her and I didn’t?

maxverstappen1: He’s just privileged.

Ynofficial: I’m coming to you, don’t fight.

user98: Everyone wants Yn. ❤️ Like to author

81_4: She’s anything but a princess.

f1lover: Please marry me.

Ynofficial: Sorry, I’m a bit busy.

Ynofficial

Description: As a good princess, I have to congratulate Charles Leclerc for winning his home race, Monaco. Congratulations, Predestined One.

Liked by charles_leclerc, f1, and other 42.457.473

f1lover: How sweet, Yn.

ferrarifan: After this post, I’m over the moon.

race_: The Monaco curse is broken.

❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: Yes, but now Charles has to endure at least a month of bad luck.

charles_leclerc: Thank you, Yn. ❤️ Like to author

charles_leclerc: I thank you, Your Highness, for wasting two minutes to make the post. ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: Consider yourself lucky.

landonorris: Will the next victory post be dedicated to me?

georgerussell63: Keep dreaming, mate. ❤️ Like to author

oscarpiastri: Charles has reached the pinnacle of his career after this post.

carlossainz55: I can hear him laughing and blushing from here. ❤️ Like to author

maxverstappen1: Princess, may I humbly request your attention? ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: I always have my full attention on you, Max Emilian Verstappen.

charles_leclerc: No, today is my day, step aside. ❤️ Like to author

user56: Is Charles jealous??

user45: Max asking for Yn’s attention?

Ynofficial

Description: I can officially say I’m off-limits.

Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 98,457.633.

yourbrother: I’m so happy for you, little sister.

❤️ Like to author

landonorris: Can I be the best man?

Ynofficial: No, you might show up to the wedding already drunk.

maxverstappen1: You said yesss! ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: I said yesss!

georgerussell63: Congratulations, guys.

❤️ Like to author

lewishamilton: Congrats, but honestly, I expected it.

❤️ Like to author

oscarpiastri: He has the eyes of love.

❤️ Like to author

user44: No, okay, we need to figure out who it is.

f1lover: It’ll be the most beautiful wedding ever.

ynlove: Our little girl is growing up.

charleslec_: I hope it’s Charles.

race: It’s definitely a driver.

vroom: I don’t know; it could also be a prince or noble.

user32: I doubt it, knowing Yn.

ynqueen: Love is blind.

user3: Whoever it is, I’m so happy for you.

user77: I’m going to drop a bomb: I think it’s Max.

maxie_: Oh God, yes, can you imagine??

1_11: The best couple ever.

Ynofficial: I like your theories.

user66: Yn, help us, please.

cl16: Has anyone noticed Charles didn’t even comment?

55_: Strange.

Ynofficial

Description: Goodbye, Monaco.

Liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, and other 757.648.

yourbrother: I can’t believe mom let you go.

carlossainz55: Knowing Yn, she would’ve gone anyway. ❤️ Like to author

Ynofficial: My friends know me too well.

user43: Wait, how long have they known each other???

formula1_: More importantly, since when does Yn love F1?

f1lover: It’s a new thing, actually.

race: Yn, princess of the people.

Ynofficial: Always at your service.

landonorris: Now she’s getting a big head.

charles_leclerc: As soon as they offered you to skip your duties, you accepted right away.

Ynofficial: You shouldn’t talk to a princess like that.

charles_leclerc: And you shouldn’t talk to a prince like that.

f1love: WAIT, WHAT DID CHARLES MEAN???

charlesmylife: Guys, Yn deleted it.

charelsofmonaco: No, I don’t understand.

16cl: I arrived too late 😭😭😭.

Flove1: Finally, we have proof that this man exists.

user65: I was convinced it was a joke.

user90: Secret agents of the world, unite, we need to find out who Yn’s boyfriend is.

user67: YN, WE HAVE TOO MANY QUESTIONS.

Ynofficial: And I have zero answers.

user56: Where are you running to, girl?

Ynofficial: Away from nobility.

Ynofficial

Description: I had to try the ice cream in Italy.

Liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1, and other 74.673.883.

yourbrother: Bring me some.

Ynofficial: No.

charles_leclerc: I’ll bring it to you.

Ynofficial: Since when are you two so chummy?

f1lover: No okay, we missed something.

race: Something important.

Formula1: Is that Leo or Yn’s dog?

f_1: The numbers don’t add up.

user78: I can’t tell them apart.

user1: They look the same.

landonorris: Good job, Yn, distract him so I can win in Monza.

carlossainz55: NO, YN, BRING CHARLES HERE NOW.

Ynofficial: Now I don’t know what to do anymore.

user56: Yn is a princess even outside of Monaco.

user09: How cute is the guy tying her shoes?

[mochinomnoms]

Imagine asking the jade and/or floyd to go swimming. Or while they are swimming you just join them. Now the eel twins keep imagining a future with you cause apparently moray eels do synchronized swimming with their mates. Just to add to the chaos you will probably be non the wiser to the deeper meaning of their careless actions.

I think it's especially funny if one twin is doing the "dance" with you while the other is on the other side of the water, watching with a knowing look.

The real question is how do they proceed to bully their brother over it?

Floyd

The obvious option for Floyd is to have him be very blunt and loud in his teasing, but I offer a different idea. You have no clue what the significance of the dance is, for all you know it's just Jade playing around! And Floyd just wants to play!

"You don't mind if I dance with them too, right Jaaaade?"

Floyd doesn't even wait for him to answer as he swipes your hand and spins you around him in the water. It's quite fun, but if you pay attention, Floyd is still keeping a rather wide berth of room between you two. Compared to Jade, who was twirling with you held close to him, it's practically conservative! Fortunately for him, he's good at hiding his frustration, so you can't really tell he's bothered until Floyd gets just a bit too close. This makes Jade quickly and smoothly snatches you back into his arms and far away from his annoying brother. >:(

Jade

Jade is just a bit meaner than his brother, as he's more than happy to make little comments about Floyd as he dances with you. He just lives to prod at Floyd just to see how long it takes for him to either throw hands or decide he's now bored because Jade wouldn't stop bothering him.

"Oya, getting rather touchy aren't we Floyd? Should I be informing mother about a new addition to the family?"

Floyd nonstop smacks with the tip of his tail do nothing to deter him as Jade follows you two, still making pointed remarks. First, he mentions if his brother would prefer privacy. Then he asks you if you ever had a chance to learn more about mer culture. You're confused as to why Jade is mentioning courting practices, but have no chance to ask him what he's talking about before Floyd is throwing himself at Jade and beating his ass.

[paradiseprincesss]

˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗ Tornado Warnings | Jonathan Crane

hi im back! sorry for being so inactive. i'm trying to write whenever i have like a min to breathe from uni...anyways i wanted to write something that feels like fall? does that make sense? probably not LOL

summary — the best thing to do to pass time in a power outage is sex, obviously.

warnings — smut, p in v, unprotected sex, creampie, oral (f!receiving), super soft lover boy jonathan, fluff

word count — 1.8k

masterlist

MDNI 18+ ONLY

“Oh.”

Your voice cut through the silence in Jonathan and yours’ shared, cozy bedroom as the previously dimly lit room was now consumed in total darkness. “I don’t like this,” you said to your boyfriend who was beside you in bed as you tossed your book down, “I was trying to read.” 

A tornado warning for Gotham was issued earlier, but they said that’s all it was — just a warning. However, the turbulent wind clearly had some effect on your home, as the power was now out. Like you said to Jonathan; you were just trying to read, but it seemed like Mother Nature had other plans. 

Plus, you weren’t a big fan of the dark. Couldn’t the power have gone off at any other time besides nearly midnight? 

“You’re funny, you know that?” Jonathan said with a chuckle, and if you could’ve seen him right now, you knew you’d see him smiling. You heard some shuffling as Jonathan reached over, presumably to grab his phone, and turning on the flashlight. “Stay here, I’m going to grab some candles to light.” 

“I’m scared,” you whined. “I hate the dark.”

“You’ll live,” he teased, getting up before leaving the room for a few minutes until he returned, candles in hand. “Good thing you insisted we go to Target and get all these candles for fall.” 

For someone as malicious and unhinged as he was, his tough exterior would crack (more like completely shatter) when he was around you. Since Jonathan is constantly consumed by his work, he likes to spend time with you as much as he can when he isn’t at Arkham (and poisoning Gotham) working late. So, that means if you want to get Starbucks and go shopping for fall candles at Target — he’s there. 

No questions asked.

Sure, he may have been a corrupt psychiatrist as well as a hardened criminal and one of Gotham’s many rogues, but that didn’t mean he didn’t want to do domestic things with his girlfriend. On Saturday nights, he would be working till the early hours of the morning with his patients and his toxin — only to spend the following Sunday wrapped up in bed with you watching silly Netflix shows.

The best of both worlds is how Jonathan would put it. 

“You always say I have too many,” you huffed, to which he laughed softly, lighting the 3-wick candles.

“That’s because you have like, what, fifty? Our entire house smells like maple pecan waffles all the time, twenty-four-seven — but you get so excited over them. It’s cute. I love watching you get all excited over this kind of stuff.” 

You blushed at his words, looking over at his handsome face, now illuminated by the dim light of multiple lit candles placed throughout your bedroom. “Shut up,” you mumble, watching him get back into bed with you. “Just come here and love me.”

He looked at you with those heart-stopping blue eyes of his, pulling you in for a soft kiss. Instinctively, you wrapped your around his shoulders, deepening the kiss. “I’ve missed you,” he said between kisses, dragging them down your neck and nipping gently at the delicate skin. “Hate when work keeps me away from you, my dear.”

“I know,” you said quietly, eyes fluttering shut from the feeling of his lips against your skin. “I hate it, too. I…” You felt yourself losing your train of thought as his hands roamed your body, settling on your waist as you two lay cozied up in the bed. 

“Let me show you how much I’ve missed you, my darling,” he whispered, squeezing your waist gently as you rested your head comfortably against the pillows, lying back. “All I could think about at work was you. All alone at home…waitin’ for me.” 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

He left a trail of kisses all down your body, slowly building up to where you wanted him to go. Luckily for Jonathan, tonight — even amid a tornado warning — you decided to wear your favourite lace slip to bed with nothing underneath, making it all the more easy for him to access every part of you. 

Within minutes, he had you slipping out of your lace as you tossed the delicate garment somewhere onto the bedroom floor with only one thing on your mind right now. The rather intimate and romantic lighting from the collection of candles dimly lighting up the room wasn’t helping your case either. 

Jonathan’s intoxicating touch brought you back to reality, and you weren’t sure how it happened (not that you care how it came to be), but his hands were gently resting on your thighs as he lay between your legs, his crystalline blue eyes filled with hunger. 

At this very moment, you sent a silent thank you to Mother Nature for causing this to happen during ovulation week because yes, you were so horny that your glistening cunt was dripping onto the bedsheets underneath you and he hadn’t even touched you there yet. All you knew was that you needed to be touched, to be fucked, to be loved right now and thank god Jonathan was here to satisfy that primal need in you. 

“Please, Jon — we haven’t had sex in like two days,” you whined, causing him to let out a breathless laugh as he smiled sweetly at you. He may have found it funny that you were this desperate (after only 48 hours…) but you didn’t find a thing about this situation humorous. With your hormones clouding your judgment, you started to beg your loving boyfriend. “Come on Jonathan, I–”

Before you could muster up any more whines and pleas, he licked a fat stripe up your already soaking cunt, swiping his tongue through your folds as you arched your back and let out a guttural moan.

“O-oh—“ 

He lapped up your cunt skillfully as his hands kept a firm grip on your thighs, making sure that he was eating you out until you couldn’t take it anymore. “Delicious,” he mumbled against your cunt, continuing to lick, nip, and eat your pussy out as if it was the last thing he’d ever get to do in this lifetime. 

Mere minutes in and you were already arching your back, breathlessly saying his name over and over again — he could never get tired of hearing you like this. The way you’d feverishly moan “Oh, Jonathan,” and occasionally if you were exceptionally into it, you’d sometimes call him “baby,” and that always wound him up. Jonathan could spend ages with his face buried between your thighs, but it seemed that you were already close to coming pretty quickly. 

“Yes! Please–” you frantically moaned, feeling the waves of your release starting to wash over you with his tongue deep inside your soaking hole, lapping up all your juices. “Jon, baby, I’m gonna…”

Jonathan continued to eat you out as if he were a starved man through your orgasm, letting you ride it out and rut against his face until you were pushing his head away softly from the slight overstimulation. After getting up from between your legs, he wiped your arousal off of his chin, looking at you as if you were the answer to his every prayer. 

“God, you’re like a dream,” he said softly, causing your cheeks to heat up. 

Before any more romantic words could roll off the tip of his tongue, you were helping him out of his black pyjama shirt and his checkered pyjama pants (and yes, you found his love of checkered pyjama pants adorable). As soon as you tugged his pyjama pants down, his cock sprung out, slapping his stomach lightly.

“Fuck, look how hard you get me, darling,” he praised, stroking himself a few times before lining himself up with your drooling hole. He smirked as he teased the tip of his cock against your folds, watching you make a mess of the sheets underneath you just from how wet you were alone once again. “Looks like you’ve been missing me too, hm darling?” 

“So bad,” you agreed with a whimper, which turned straight into a moan as he started to push the head of his cock in. He let you get adjusted to him as you slowly took him inch by inch until you were full with his thick cock, walls stretching to accommodate his size.

“F-fuck, so f..full,” you choked out as he started to move slowly, warm hands coming to hold your hips as he gently started fucking you in the candlelight. 

“But you take it so well, darling,” he cooed softly, fucking you with a bit more force now. “Such a good girl, fuck. Look at you, taking my cock so deep.” 

“Mmm,” you mindlessly babbled, his fat cock causing you to lose all inhibitions as he (literally) fucked you stupid. “Oh, b-big–” 

As you squeaked out whatever words you could form, he let out a low groan himself, starting to really pound your warm, tight hole. You could feel his tip brushing up against that spongy spot inside of you, which in return caused you to start moaning almost helplessly.

“Right there?” He teased, watching your face contort in pure bliss and pleasure. “That feel good, darling? Jesus, you’re so pretty…”

He choked out a few incohesive curses as he felt you tighten up around him while he talked you through it, clearly already close from him plowing your cunt for just a few minutes. This was usually the best type of sex between you and Jonathan — whenever you two would just ravish each other in bed all…lovingly. Extra points if it was romantic like this; under the candlelight in a power outage. 

“Yes! Fuck, keep going, Jon,” you hoarsely screamed out as he fucked you raw, slamming his cock into your tight little cunt as you got close to your second orgasm and he was following right behind you.

“So tight,” he mumbled. “Perfect fucking pussy, so fucking good—” 

“Gon’ cum..I’m gonna–!” You whined before your vision went white, cunt clenching down around his length as you drenched him and the sheets. 

Jonathan looked down in awe as a clear liquid poured out of you, spilling all over him, his cock, and the sheets. The sight of you squirting that much sent his brain into overdrive as he gave a few more sloppy thrusts before spurting his warm, sticky cum onto your plush walls. As he filled your cunt, he let out a rather loud groan, gripping your hips so tight it almost hurt. 

For a moment, all was still and silent as the two of you caught your breaths in the now slightly stuffy bedroom that smelt like a mix of sex and whatever pumpkin-spiced and cinnamon-scented candles you had going. Jonathan was the first to speak as he finally pulled out of you, careful not to hurt you, and pulled you close into his arms the second he laid back down beside you. 

“I’m never going to stop you from getting your candles ever again,” he decided jokingly, kissing the top of your head. 

“See,” you said proudly, “they set the mood and they smell good.” 

“True,” he said, pausing for a moment before looking down at the soaked bedding then back at you with a smile. “So, we should probably clean the sheets…”

taglist ->

@girlinterrupted505 @ciriceimpera @jordyn-yeager @thevelvetvampyre @galactict3a

@xanaxiii @nocturnest @psylrd @bloodandglitter207 @humbuginmybones 

@oceanstem @futurefamousdeadmusician @jonathancraneslittlepet @esotericdoe

@kpopgirlbtssvt 

@ll4n4 @ilovetoxicfictionalmen @the-buddy-things @ellebellebarnes @wiseyouthinfluencer

@abprill @minedofmoria @strangeobsessed @5tud10-54r4h @franzine-xii 

@stsrfujid @psylrd @eyraaaaaae @nyxxie-pooh @momoewn

@fauxcongenialite @ceruleanrainblues @o0laura @fiona-my-love @cranecat

@hfidnnf

[f14fun]

lay all your love on me - op81 (C2)

synopsis: in which oscar piastri and a university student begging for her euro summer vacation collide in a steamy, abba-inspired romance

prose (6.1K words) ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ profile | masterlist | series index ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

─────────────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───────────────────

02: Love, Sweat, and Secondhand Embarrassment

"Clemmy I swear I wanted to die that entire time. Whoever I offended in an alternate universe I am so so sorry, I truly believe karma is real now," I lamented, voice weak.

Burying my head in my pillow, I could finally appreciate the cool blast of AC (well, it was a little bit of air conditioning but a little is better than nothing) I scratched my right leg that was hoisted up onto the blue duvet cover. If not for the horrible comedic timing of everything, in that moment, I might have said that I was enjoying myself.

On the other line of the phone, thousands of miles away, it was a completely different story.

"What the fuck," Clementine could barely muster out because she was laughing so hard.

"I still don't think any part of this story is funny, Clem," I roll my eyes and trail off.

"But it is! You genuinely should consider a career in stand-up comedy. If you recounted all of this in front of a paying live audience, I'm just saying it could make you a millionaire overnight," Clementine wheezed.

"Oh, shut up, bitch," I retorted, trying to suppress a smile despite my mortification.

"You know it's true though!" Her girlish giggles rang through my room. I could see her face through the screen and it looked like visible tears were streaming down her face from how funny she found this to be.

"I am completely and utterly humiliated. There is no way I can go downstairs and face everyone right now," I whined. It was true, as twenty minutes ago, mid-Facetime with Clementine, I heard the door to the foyer open and heard a lot of new noises.

New people. The neighbors. The rest of the Australians.

Crikey, mate.

There was no way I could face them. And since Oscar was probably their son (he looked way too young to be a father) he had probably already told them about the wretched and humiliating mishap.

"Seriously, Clemmy, you don’t get it," I said, trying to keep the frustration out of my voice but failing miserably. "This is not just some embarrassing story. This is my life, and I have to face these people now."

Clementine’s laughter finally started to subside, and she took a deep breath. "Okay, okay, I get it. But you have to admit, this is a once-in-a-lifetime kind of disaster. You can’t just ignore it. It’s like the universe is telling you to embrace the chaos."

I sighed, feeling a bit more grounded with her calming tone. "Yeah, well, I’m not exactly feeling the universe’s love right now. I feel like I’ve been dropped into some kind of sitcom. And what if they think I’m a total klutz? I can’t even begin to imagine how Oscar must’ve described me."

"It'll be fine. You are a pro at handling horrible situations. I mean, I can really only think that you have had more bad experiences with guys than good ones!" Clem tried to reassure me.

"Wow, thanks," I deadpanned. "Way to make a girl feel special."

Clementine's voice was full of playful sympathy. "Hey, I’m just saying, you’ve survived everything life’s thrown at you so far. Besides, look at it this way: if they’re judging you based on this one incident, they’re missing out on getting to know the amazing person you are."

"Yeah, because nothing says 'amazing' like face-planting into a pile of shampoo and knocking over a bunch of cleaning supplies," I said, sarcasm dripping from my tone.

Clementine laughed. "Exactly! And let’s be honest, if they do judge you for this, they’re definitely not worth your time. Besides, Oscar might even think you’re charming in a clumsy, endearing kind of way. You never know."

"You should really consider a career in therapy. If I lay here and close my eyes for a bit and sleep for three hours surely your advice will work," I retorted.

"Oh be so serious with me now,"

"I am! Now I can add a new skill to my LinkedIn profile," I said, trying to stifle a giggle. "How about 'Expert in Catastrophic Bathroom Mishaps: Master of Turning Shower Encounters into Slapstick Comedy'?"

Clementine burst into laughter. “That’s quite a title! It’s like you’ve got a whole new niche market for yourself.”

“Right? I’m just waiting for the endorsement from ‘The Association of Embarrassing Bathroom Incidents,’” I said, imagining a badge with that exact title. What a big, fat, fucking joke.

“Or maybe you'll become the keynote speaker for the 'International Conference on Unexpected Water-Based Accidents,’” Clementine added, her voice full of amusement.

“I’ll make sure to include a workshop on ‘How to Survive a Bathroom Collision with Dignity and Humor,’” I said with a chuckle. “And don’t forget the seminar on ‘Turning Slip-and-Fall Disasters into Networking Opportunities.’”

“A career to consider!” Clementine laughed. “And you know what? I’ll be your first fan. Just remember to keep me updated on how your new ‘disastrous bathroom mishap’ career is going.”

“I’ll make sure to do that,” I promised with a smile. “Thanks for the laugh. It’s nice to know that even in the middle of a fiasco, I can count on you to turn it into a comedy show.”

"What can I say, I will never turn down listening to a free shit show," Clementine winked at me through the camera.

"Clem! What the hell!" I waved my manicured pointed nail at her.

"Bye! Don't die from embarrassment before you come back!" She quipped, then promptly hung up.

I lay sprawled on my bed, dreading the thought of going downstairs and facing the group of new neighbors. The whole idea made me cringe. I was just about to mentally prepare myself for the awkward introductions when a sudden knock on my door jolted me upright. My heart raced as I called out lazily, “Come in.”

The door creaked open, and I nearly jumped out of my skin when I saw Oscar standing there. His eyebrow was raised, and he wore a cheeky grin that did nothing to ease my nerves.

"Well, well, well," he said with an amused smirk. "Looks like you’ve been having quite the chat with 'dearest Clemmy,' haven’t you?"

My face flushed beet red, and I stuttered, struggling to find my words. “W-What are you doing here?”

Oscar leaned casually against the doorframe, clearly enjoying my discomfort. “Oh, you know, just overheard you and Clemmy talking about our little mishap. I believe you mentioned something about me being ‘a charming yet infuriating Aussie who managed to turn your bathroom break into a comedy skit.’”

I blinked, stunned into silence. My mouth opened and closed, but no coherent words came out. The sheer embarrassment was overwhelming. Oscar’s casual demeanor and his cheeky grin only made things worse.

“What can I say, my name was called,” Oscar continued with a mischievous glint in his eye. “If someone keeps calling you hot, I mean, wouldn’t you be too curious to listen?”

His smirk only made my breath hitch and my fingers tremble a little more. I could feel my cheeks burning, and I struggled to come up with a response. The playful glint in his eye and his casual attitude did nothing to alleviate my embarrassment. Instead, they only made me feel more flustered.

I took a deep breath, trying to regain some semblance of composure. “W-Well, I guess I didn’t think anyone would be actually listening.”

Oscar raised an eyebrow playfully, his smirk widening. “Oh, I’m sure you didn’t. But it was too good to pass up. Especially the part where you called me a ‘human wrecking ball.’”

My face flushed a deeper shade of crimson. “Great. Just great,” I muttered, shifting uncomfortably. “I’m sure I’ve made a fantastic first impression.”

Oscar chuckled, leaning casually against the doorframe. “Look, it’s all good. I’ve seen worse first impressions. Trust me. At least you didn’t accidentally set off the fire alarm or flood the place.”

I managed a weak smile, still feeling the sting of embarrassment. “Yeah, well, I’ll try to keep any future disasters to a minimum.”

Look at me, constantly embarrassing myself in front of hot guys. This was the exact reason why I was still bitchless and socially awkward at the ripe age of twenty-one. I could navigate a spreadsheet like a pro, ace exams, and even master the perfect contour, but put me in a room with a cute guy, and I turned into a walking calamity.

I sighed internally, already dreading the inevitable teasing I’d get from Clemmy once she found out I had, yet again, failed to keep my cool around a guy. Maybe I should’ve just stayed in the bathroom and let the ground swallow me whole.

Oscar raised an eyebrow, studying me with a curious look. “You know, you seem like a completely different person right now. Way quieter, more shy… less daring.”

My face flushed with a mix of irritation and embarrassment. “That’s not true,” I snapped, crossing my arms defensively. “I’m exactly the same as I was before.”

Oscar’s grin widened, clearly enjoying the effect his words had on me. “Sure, if you say so. But the girl who almost took me down like a rugby player in the bathroom seemed a lot more fearless.”

My nose flared as I shot him a glare, feeling the fire of indignation rise within me. Who did he think he was, making assumptions about me? I’ll show him just how brave I can be, I thought, my fists clenching. If he wanted to see daring, then I’d make sure he regretted ever doubting me. The nerve of this guy! He might have been hot, but that didn’t give him the right to push my buttons like this.

Oscar gave me a lopsided grin, clearly pleased with himself. "Anyway, everyone’s heading downstairs to meet each other. Figured I’d let you know, since, you know, it’s probably not the best idea to hide out up here forever."

My stomach twisted with nerves at the thought of facing everyone after that humiliating encounter. The idea of meeting new people while still reeling from my disastrous introduction to Oscar was daunting. But there was no way I was going to let him see how nervous I actually was. I took a deep breath, nodding stiffly. "Fine, let’s get this over with."

As we walked out of the room and toward the stairs, I could feel Oscar’s presence behind me—large, imposing, and annoyingly close. My face heated up, and I silently cursed myself for blushing yet again. Why did this guy have to make everything so difficult?

It was like shooting a sitting duck. A little small talk, a smile, and baby, I was stuck. I was a grown woman, for god’s sake, not some teenager swooning over a crush. But there I was, getting flustered over a guy I barely knew. Get a grip, I told myself, trying to shake off the absurdity of the situation. This wasn’t supposed to happen—I wasn’t supposed to be this easily charmed.

When we reached the bottom of the stairs, I hesitated, gripping the railing a little longer than usual. I could feel Oscar’s gaze on me, and it only made my nerves worse. Just as I was about to take the first step down, his hand brushed against mine. The contact was brief but enough to send a jolt of awareness through me. His hand was rough with calluses, moderately enveloping mine in a way that felt both comforting and disarming.

What was it about this guy that made me feel so uncharacteristically off-balance? As I tried to steady my racing thoughts, I reminded myself that I had to keep it together. After all, I wasn’t about to let some smooth-talking Aussie turn me into a lovesick fool—no matter how much my traitorous heart seemed to enjoy the challenge.

As I reached the bottom of the stairs, my eyes were drawn to two adults who were deep in conversation with my mom. Their warm, friendly demeanor and unmistakable Australian accents told me they were Oscar’s parents. They seemed just as lively and outgoing as he was, which only added to the strangeness of this entire situation.

Then, I spotted Oscar’s siblings—a trio of sisters who looked like carbon copies of him, yet each had her own distinct vibe, like different fonts of the same typeface. They were laughing and joking with each other, their bond evident in the way they effortlessly engaged in light-hearted banter. I felt a pang of envy, wishing I had siblings to share that kind of closeness with.

My daydream was abruptly shattered when Oscar’s large, warm hand clasped onto my shoulder, his fingers pressing gently but firmly against my skin. The unexpected touch sent a jolt through me, making me jump slightly as a flush of heat rushed to my cheeks. His chuckle, deep and amused, rumbled behind me, the sound wrapping around me like a teasing caress. He was standing on the step just above me, close enough that I could feel his breath on the back of my neck. His presence was unmistakably felt—broad, solid, and way too close for comfort, yet somehow not close enough.

His fingers lingered on my shoulder, almost as if he was testing my reaction, and I could feel the warmth radiating from his touch, seeping into my skin. The space between us seemed to shrink with every passing second, and I could barely concentrate on anything but the weight of his hand and the steady beat of my heart hammering in my chest.

Oscar leaned in slightly, his voice low and smooth as honey. “Jumpier than I thought,” he drawled, his tone dripping with playful mischief. “Didn’t take you for the shy type. Especially not after our little bathroom tango.” His grin widened, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a way that was both infuriating and ridiculously charming.

My pulse quickened at the way he was looking at me—those eyes sparkling with amusement, as if he knew exactly what he was doing. I swallowed hard, my mind racing to come up with a retort, but all I could focus on was how his hand, still resting on my shoulder, felt both protective and possessive. The air between us crackled with a tension that was impossible to ignore, and I had to remind myself to breathe.

I could quite literally cut the sexual tension with the dullest fucking butterknife in the world.

I tried to muster a sharp retort, something that would wipe that smug grin off his face, but my brain was too busy short-circuiting to cooperate. All I could manage was a stuttered, “I-I’m not shy! You just—caught me off guard, that’s all.” The words tumbled out, weak and unconvincing, and I mentally cringed at how feeble they sounded.

Oscar’s grin only grew, clearly enjoying my flustered state. He leaned in a little closer, his gaze locked on mine with a playful intensity that made my heart skip a beat. “Off guard, huh?” he murmured, his voice dipping lower. “So, you’re saying if I hadn’t surprised you, you’d be able to keep up?”

I opened my mouth to respond, determined to regain some semblance of dignity, but nothing clever came out. Instead, I just stood there, caught between wanting to pull away from his teasing and feeling inexplicably drawn to his warmth. His hand slid from my shoulder, and the absence of his touch left a surprising chill in its wake.

Realizing that my window for a comeback was closing, I finally managed to sputter, “Y-Yeah, exactly.” I immediately cursed myself for sounding so pathetic. Not exactly the sharp comeback I was hoping for. His smirk deepened, and I could tell he wasn’t buying it for a second.

“Sure, whatever you say,” Oscar replied, his tone still dripping with amusement. He straightened up, giving me a quick wink before stepping down to the next stair. The playful glint in his eyes told me he knew exactly how much he was getting under my skin, and he was loving every second of it.

As he moved past me, I finally found my voice—too little, too late—and muttered under my breath, “Cocky bastard.” But it was quiet enough that I hoped he didn’t hear it. To my dismay, Oscar paused, turning back with a raised eyebrow and an even wider grin.

“Sorry, didn’t catch that,” he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Care to repeat it?”

My cheeks flamed as I quickly shook my head. “Nope, nothing. Let’s just… go meet everyone.”

Oscar’s grin didn’t falter as he took a step closer, still looming above me. “You know,” he began, his voice casual but with that familiar teasing edge, “I’ve already met everyone else. Your mom, too. And I’ve gotta say, you two seem like complete opposites.”

I blinked up at him, caught off guard again. “Opposites?”

He nodded, leaning against the wall with that effortless ease he seemed to have perfected. “Yep. Your mom’s all smiles and warm welcomes. You, on the other hand… well, you’ve got this whole ‘ready to throw punches’ vibe going on.”

I narrowed my eyes at him, trying to gauge whether he was being serious or just messing with me again. “I do not have a ‘ready to throw punches’ vibe.”

Oscar’s lips twitched like he was holding back a laugh. “Oh, you totally do. But don’t worry,” he added with a playful smirk, “it’s kind of endearing. Keeps things interesting.”

I huffed, crossing my arms over my chest. “Glad to know I’m so entertaining for you.”

He shrugged, unfazed. “Hey, I’m just saying, opposites attract, right? Besides, your mom already likes me. You could take a few notes.”

His comment sent a fresh wave of warmth to my cheeks, both from irritation and something I couldn’t quite place. “I don’t need notes from you,” I shot back, though my voice lacked its usual bite.

Oscar just chuckled, giving me one last teasing wink before turning to head down the stairs. “Whatever you say, mate. Just try not to tackle anyone else while you’re at it.”

"Well well well, what do we have here?" A girl with short hair and a devious grin matching Oscar's grinned at me as well entered the kitchen. Shimmering her hands like "jazz hands", she rolled her eyes and rested her chin in the palm of her hand.

I turned to face the new arrival, immediately recognizing her as one of Oscar’s sisters—one of the three siblings who seemed to share his penchant for mischief. Her cropped hair and sharp, playful eyes made her look like she’d just stepped out of a rom-com where she was the resident troublemaker, always stirring the pot and having a laugh at everyone else’s expense.

“Hey, party people,” she said, her voice dripping with a teasing lilt. She shot me a grin that was almost a mirror image of Oscar’s, mischievous and knowing, like she was in on some inside joke I hadn’t been let in on yet. I could feel the same heat from before creeping up my neck. Why did it feel like these siblings were reading me like an open book?

“Looks like someone’s already made a grand entrance,” she continued, flicking her eyes between me and Oscar with an amused smirk. “Oscar’s been talking about you nonstop since we got here. Said something about a ‘bathroom fiasco’ that deserves an award?”

I shot a glare at Oscar, who was leaning casually against the counter, looking far too pleased with himself. “Did he now?” I said, trying to keep my voice steady despite the mortification clawing at me.

The girl laughed, light and musical, but with an edge that told me she was fully enjoying every bit of this. “Oh yeah, he’s been filling us in. But don’t worry, we’re used to his tall tales. I’m Hattie, by the way,” she added, extending a hand with exaggerated enthusiasm as if we were meeting on the set of a game show rather than in my kitchen.

I hesitated for a beat before shaking her hand, trying to muster a smile that didn’t look too forced. “Nice to meet you, Hattie. I’m—”

“Oh, I know who you are,” she interrupted, her grin widening. “You’re the girl who almost took out my brother. Honestly, I’m impressed. No one’s ever managed to knock him off his game quite like that.”

I glanced at Oscar, who was watching the exchange with an infuriatingly smug look on his face. Maisie’s comment hung in the air, both a compliment and a lighthearted jab. I couldn’t help but feel like I was once again the butt of some inside joke between the siblings.

“Yeah, well, it’s a special talent of mine,” I said, trying to sound casual but feeling like every word was being scrutinized. “Guess I just have that effect.”

Hattie laughed, the sound bright and unapologetically amused. “Oh, I like you already. But hey, if you’re gonna hang out with us, you better be ready for a little friendly chaos. And maybe a few more unexpected collisions.”

Oscar gave a soft snort of laughter, and I could feel his eyes still on me, assessing, teasing, and—annoyingly—almost impressed. I tried to ignore the butterflies that seemed to be staging a full-on rebellion in my stomach. Clearly, this family thrived on playful torment, and I had somehow found myself right in the middle of it.

“Don’t worry,” I said, straightening up and forcing a confident smile. “I think I can handle whatever you guys throw at me.”

Hattie's eyes sparkled with mischief, and she gave me a mock salute. “That’s the spirit. Welcome to the chaos, mate.”

Oscar chuckled again, giving me that damn wink before pushing off from the counter. “Oh, she’s ready for it. Trust me, she’s already made quite the impression.”

The other two girls strolled in, each with their own distinct energy that filled the room. One had a fierce, confident look, dark hair tied up in a messy bun, and a leather jacket that screamed ‘cooler-than-you’ vibes. The youngest, a curly-haired, bright-eyed whirlwind, practically bounced into the kitchen, her infectious smile lighting up the space.

“So,” I said, feeling slightly overwhelmed by the sudden influx of new faces. “I’ve met Oscar, obviously, and… Hattie, right?” I glanced at the girl who had first greeted me, who nodded with a playful smile. “But I’m afraid I haven’t gotten your names yet,” I continued, pointing between the other two sisters.

The girl with the leather jacket gave me a wry grin, leaning casually against the counter. “I’m Edie,” she said, her voice dripping with casual confidence. “The cooler, smarter middle child.”

Mae, the youngest, immediately chimed in, rolling her eyes at her sister. “And I’m Mae, the fun one,” she said with a giggle, her curls bouncing as she hopped up onto a stool. “Edie’s just mad she wasn’t born with my charm.”

Edie snorted, pretending to be offended. “Please, you’re like a tiny tornado of chaos. But yeah, I guess she’s not wrong,” she added, shooting me a smirk. “Mae’s got a way of making everything a little… livelier.”

I couldn’t help but smile at their playful back-and-forth. “Nice to officially meet you all. And thanks for the heads-up on your brother’s antics,” I said, glancing at Oscar, who was watching the exchange with an amused glint in his eye.

“Oh, trust me,” Hattie added, her grin widening as she nudged Oscar with her elbow. “We’ve got years of experience keeping this one in line. You’re welcome to join the effort.”

Oscar threw his hands up in mock surrender. “Wow, ganging up on me already? This is why I never bring girls home,” he joked, though there was a hint of genuine warmth in his voice, like he was more than used to—and secretly enjoyed—their teasing.

Mae leaned forward, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “Just wait till we start telling you all the embarrassing stories. Oscar’s got quite a few, and we’ve got no problem spilling the tea.”

Oscar smirked, shifting his weight just enough to close the distance between us, his presence suddenly feeling a lot closer, a lot warmer. He leaned in with a casual ease, his movements smooth and unhurried, as if he had all the time in the world to make me squirm. His voice dropped into a playful, low tone, rich and velvety, each word dripping with deliberate charm. “Oh, don’t worry about them,” he murmured, his gaze locked onto mine with an intensity that made my heart skip a beat. “I’d much rather hear your stories. You’re far more interesting than anything they could say about me.”

The way he looked at me was like I was the only person in the room, his eyes lingering on mine with a bold, flirtatious glint that sent a shiver down my spine. His grin was maddeningly confident, a little crooked, and devastatingly irresistible—the kind of smile that made it clear he knew exactly what he was doing. It was teasing, suggestive, and far too charming for its own good, like he was daring me to blush, daring me to react.

I felt the heat creeping up my neck, a slow burn that spread across my cheeks, making my skin prickle with the sudden awareness of how close he was. My mind scrambled for something clever to say, but his flirtatious tone, the way his eyes roved over my face as if he was reading every reaction, left me tongue-tied. It was like he was peeling back layers with just a look, searching for the part of me that he could fluster with a few well-placed words and that infuriating smile.

I tried to steady my breath, but his proximity was overwhelming. I could catch the faint scent of his cologne—fresh, with a hint of something spicy—and the subtle shift of his body as he leaned closer sent my senses into overdrive. Every nerve seemed to hum in response to his nearness, and I could feel my face burning hotter, betraying me with every second that I failed to look away.

Edie made a gagging noise, rolling her eyes dramatically. “Ew, Oscar, seriously? Can you not flirt for like five seconds? It’s embarrassing.”

Mae giggled, giving Oscar a playful shove. “Yeah, gross. No one wants to see that. Save it for when we’re not around, Romeo.”

Hattie snorted, shaking her head as she watched Oscar with a mix of amusement and exasperation. “He’s always like this. Thinks he’s Mr. Smooth. Don’t let him get to you.”

But Oscar only chuckled, clearly unfazed by his sisters’ teasing. He turned back to me, his grin widening as he caught sight of my flushed cheeks. “Aww, look at that,” he said, his voice soft and teasing. “Did I make you blush? How cute.”

I quickly tried to hide my face, mortification bubbling up as I realized there was no escaping the heat radiating from my cheeks. “N-No, you didn’t,” I stammered, though the pink tint on my face said otherwise.

Oscar’s smirk deepened, and he leaned in just a little closer, his voice barely above a whisper. “You’re not very good at hiding it, you know. It’s kind of endearing.”

I could practically feel my cheeks getting even more red, if that was even possible. His sisters snickered behind us, enjoying the show as much as they enjoyed tormenting him.

Mae nudged Hattie, whispering loud enough for everyone to hear, “He’s really laying it on thick, huh? Someone needs to put a leash on this one.”

Hattie snickered and turned to me, giving me an exaggeratedly sympathetic look. “Don’t worry, he does this to everyone. It’s part of his ‘charm offensive.’ Just don’t let him get away with it too easily.”

“Yeah, make him work for it,” Edie added with a laugh. “And don’t let that blush fool you. He’s got enough of an ego without you feeding it.”

Oscar just shrugged, clearly unbothered by his sisters’ ribbing. He kept his eyes on me, his smile softening just slightly. “They’re just jealous because they know I’m right. You really are something else.”

I rolled my eyes, trying to fight the smile that was creeping onto my face despite my best efforts. “You’re impossible,” I muttered, crossing my arms in an attempt to compose myself.

Oscar leaned back, finally giving me a bit of space but not without one last wink. “Impossible’s my specialty,” he said, the playful challenge hanging in the air.

Hattie clapped her hands together, breaking the charged silence that had wrapped around us. “Alright, lovebirds, let’s change the scene before this kitchen gets any steamier,” she said with a sly grin, glancing between Oscar and me. “What do you say we all head out to the pool? It’s hot as hell today, and I could use a swim.”

Mae’s eyes lit up at the suggestion, and she bounced on her toes with excitement. “Yes, please! I’ve been dying to jump in all morning. Come on, it’ll be fun.”

Edie shrugged, pushing off the counter. “Sounds like a plan. Beats sitting around here watching Oscar make a fool of himself,” she said, shooting her brother a pointed look that he brushed off with a careless smirk.

I hesitated, caught off guard by the sudden change in plans. The thought of the pool—cool water, bright sun, and lounging with these new, vibrant personalities—was tempting, but my mind immediately jumped to what that would mean: changing into a bikini, being under the sun's scrutiny, and, worse, the idea of Oscar’s eyes on me again, but this time with even less to hide behind.

“Uh, yeah, sure,” I said, trying to sound casual, though my heart was starting to race for an entirely different reason now. “Just give me a minute to get changed.”

As I slipped back into my room, I rummaged through my suitcase, finding the bright bikini I had packed on a whim but hadn’t quite planned on wearing in front of a whole audience of strangers. It was a pretty number—a little more revealing than I was used to—but suddenly, the idea of wearing it around Oscar felt daunting. My insecurities bubbled up: the nagging thoughts of whether my stomach was flat enough, if my thighs looked alright, or if the faint stretch marks I tried so hard to ignore would be too noticeable under the bright afternoon sun.

I took a deep breath, staring at my reflection in the mirror. I tugged at the fabric, trying to adjust it in a way that made me feel more comfortable, but the nerves wouldn’t settle. I could already imagine Oscar’s eyes lingering on me, his playful smirk turning into something more appraising, and the thought sent a rush of heat to my cheeks. God, why was I letting this get to me? It was just a pool. Just a bikini. Just Oscar. But the more I tried to rationalize, the more those little fears crept in, whispering doubts that made my stomach churn.

I was so lost in my own thoughts, adjusting and readjusting the strings and trying to silence the negative self-talk, that I nearly jumped out of my skin when a sudden knock rattled my door. My heart leaped into my throat, and I spun around, my breath catching as I called out, “W-Who is it?”

“It’s me,” came Oscar’s familiar voice, muffled but still clear enough to send a jolt of nerves through me. “Just checking to see if you’re alright in there. You’ve been quiet, and, well, didn’t want you chickening out on us.”

His tone was light, but there was something softer in it, something that caught me off guard. It wasn’t the usual teasing or the cocky one-liners I’d grown accustomed to in the short time I’d known him. This felt… genuine. A flicker of concern threaded through his words, almost like he actually cared if I was okay. My cheeks flushed anew, this time from the unexpected warmth of his attention rather than embarrassment.

I sat on the edge of the bed, my fingers fidgeting with the hem of my cover-up as I tried to piece together my swirling thoughts. Was this the same Oscar who had been smirking at me in the kitchen, flirting shamelessly in front of his sisters? The same Oscar who seemed to relish every moment he made me blush or stumble over my words? It was strange, almost disarming, to hear him like this—concerned, attentive, with none of his usual bravado.

My heart fluttered at the thought. What if there was more to him than just the cheeky guy who lived for teasing? I couldn’t help but feel a small, unexpected tug in my chest, an urge to believe that this side of him was real and not just some act. But then, just as quickly, my rational side kicked in, reminding me that I’d known Oscar for all of three hours, most of which had been spent flustered and caught up in his whirlwind of charm.

Was I reading too much into this? Was I letting my own insecurities and wishful thinking color my perception of him? It was hard not to, especially when he swung so easily between flirty and sincere, keeping me constantly off-balance. I barely knew this guy, yet here I was, letting my mind wander into dangerous territory, imagining depth and sincerity that might not even be there.

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to steady my thoughts. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions—didn’t want to let a few kind words make me think I’d seen some hidden side of him. But it was hard not to feel flustered when his voice had softened like that, when he’d taken the time to check on me instead of just joking about how long I was taking.

The knock on my door, the concern in his tone—it all felt so different from the playful Oscar who’d swaggered into my life just a few hours ago. Maybe it was nothing, just a moment of decency, a brief glimpse of something real behind the jokes and teasing. Or maybe I was just overthinking, desperate to see something more in him because he’d managed to get under my skin in a way I wasn’t quite prepared for.

I sighed, feeling my cheeks heat up once more as the realization hit me—I was blushing again, and not just from embarrassment this time. There was something about Oscar, something that made me want to believe he was more than the carefree charmer he projected. But whether that was true or just wishful thinking, I couldn’t be sure. Not yet.

“I-I’m fine!” I called back, trying to steady my voice, but it came out shaky, betraying the mix of anxiety and embarrassment that had settled in my chest. “Just… getting ready.”

There was a pause on the other side of the door, long enough that I thought he might have walked away. But then, Oscar’s voice cut through again, softer this time, and with a teasing edge. “You sure? I promise no one’s gonna judge you out there. Least of all me.”

The reassurance felt sincere, but I couldn’t help the way my mind raced with all the what-ifs. What if he did look? What if I didn’t look good enough? What if this stupid bikini made me feel more exposed than I could handle? I glanced at myself one last time in the mirror, trying to summon the confidence that I usually wore so easily, but right now felt like it was hiding somewhere I couldn’t reach.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” I finally managed, forcing a smile I hoped he couldn’t hear through the door. “Just... give me a sec. I’ll be right out.”

“Take your time,” Oscar said, his voice fading as he finally moved away from the door. “But don’t take too long. You don’t wanna miss the fun.”

As his footsteps retreated, I let out a shaky breath, trying to collect myself. I ran a hand through my hair, giving myself one last pep talk before heading out. It was just a pool day, I reminded myself. Just a stupid pool day with some new people and a guy who was way too good at making me blush. And maybe, just maybe, it would be fun—if I could get out of my own head long enough to let it be.

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taglist! @mingyusbigrighttoe @theblueblub @demandealalune @linnygirl09

[storiesfromafan]

Rumours - Buck x Reader

A/N: okay, this is my first attempt at good old Gale 'Buck' Cleven, so please be nice 😅 And I am sorry in advance if its not that good haha.

Warnings: angst, possible grammer and spelling mistakes

Prompt: “You think I wanted this to happen? You think I, of all people, wanted to fall in love with you”

Tag list: @strayrockette

When you signed up to be a nurse during the war, you had been scared of what you would see. And see you did. Many times you questioned why you did it. But meeting both Buck and Bucky, you understood why. They were funny and sweet guys. Buck the more level headed one, while Bucky was a wild card. You never know what he would do. You did what you did for them, and men like them. They needed someone that was like home while doing what they did and through this war.

They took you into their circle. Making it hard to say no to their company, which you were grateful for after a long day after being on stand by, as those injured came in for treatment. The hurt and broken men you saw, it was heartbreaking and soul crushing. Yet you did your job. Helping Doctors and tending to those in recovery.

Over time you found yourself having a silly crush on Major Cleven. And when it turned to something more – love – you thought yourself foolish. He had a sweetheart back home, waiting for him patiently. So you put those feelings away, in a box which you locked and hid the key.

Unfortunately, a few of the other nurses, ones who you think fancied Bucky more than Buck, had it out for you. For rumours started to make the rounds about you and your affections. The way eyes would watch you as you entered a room. Silence falling between those that had clearly been conversing before your arrival. And then when you heard what they were saying, it hurt. It hurt because these people, whom you thought highly of, had tarnished your reputation.

“She's trying to steal another woman’s man, how shameless".

“I heard she's thrown herself at Major Cleven and Major Egan. It's why she's always with them".

“I always thought she had no morals. She’s always too friendly with the Doctors".

That was just some of the stuff you'd heard. So you took to distancing yourself from everyone. Only being present during your shifts, meetings or at meals. Otherwise you were in your quarters, walking around the base or going into town. It was lonely being separate from everyone. But you didn’t want to stir any new gossip.

Currently you were taking a walk around the base, enjoying the nice weather. You had been over worked the last few days, having a moment like this was just what you needed. In the distance you could hear the air crafts being worked on. But other then that, it was quiet. A contrast to back home and where you lived.

If only your peace was to last. Coming up behind you, as you were looking off into the vast open area and the blue sky, was Buck. He looked worried as he studied you. It felt like forever since he had spoken to you. He was concerned about you and how you were taking the rumours going around base. Ones which he and Bucky had been working to clear up.

You heard the rustle of grass from moving feet. But you remained where you were, waiting to know who it was. You had a fifty-fifty chance on knowing who it was, though you hoped it was Bucky.

“Hey" came Buck's soft voice. And squashing your hopes on Major Egan.

“Hi" you replied, still not turning around.

There was a moment of silence between you both. You hoping he wasn’t here to talk about what people were saying. While Buck was trying to think of how to say what he was thinking. He wanted you to know he didn't believe what was being said, that he knew you were a nice and good woman who didn't deserve this slander.

“Look, about what I've heard” Buck began, making you stiffen. “I don't believe what anyone has been saying, you know that right? You're not that kind of woman".

You nodded your head slowly. “W-what have you heard?” You asked, not entirely wanting to hear his answer.

Placing his hands on his hips, Buck looked down, unsure if he should answer your question. “Let's just say what I heard, I didn't like. And both myself and Bucky have been doing our best to shut it all down".

That was when you turned around, a sad but thankful smile on your face. Seeing your face and how worn out you look, it pulled at Buck's heartstrings. He could see you were tired, but that was due to the busy last few days. But also he could see the toll how this whole rumour thing was taking on you. When you distanced yourself, it broke his and Bucky's hearts.

They had come to enjoy your company, and your spirit. The three of you always finding something to talk about or laugh at, though it was usually at Bucky's antics. He never understood how women could be so catty. But in some cases, men are just as bad.

“Everything will be alright" Buck said, looking you in the eye. “Give it a few days and it should start to go back to how it was...”

You frowned. “I'm afraid the damage is done Buck. Even if people aren't saying it, they'll be thinking it. I'll be surprised if I don't get pulled in for a meeting over it...”

“Bucky and I will stand up for you".

“That might not be a good idea. It may only make it worse" your voice weary, eyes falling to the ground.

“But none of its true, right?” He questioned, hoping he sounded worried and not accusing.

You should have said no right away, though it might have given him the wrong idea. But the prolonged silence didn't help either. You avoided his eyes as Buck tried to meet them. You turned away from him and wrapped your arms around yourself.

“(Y/N), none of its true...?” Buck repeated himself, now with worry.

You sighed. “No...except for one thing...”

Buck moved closer to you. “What is true? You have to tell me so I, Bucky and I can help".

Thinking he was going to place a hand on your shoulder, you flinched, taking a few steps back. “I-it's embarrassing...and childish...”

Buck remained silent, urging you with his eyes to go on.

You sighed. “I-it's my feelings...for you" you ended on a whisper.

But Buck still heard it. He had heard how some women had gossiped about you being in love with him. And he had found it ridiculous. You were friends, that was it. So he had thought. But now, from your admission, those women had been right. Which didn't help the unease he was feeling over it all. He felt angry that they had spread your true feelings. Feelings you had kept to yourself, never acting on. Unlike some women he had seen. They were more shameless then you.

“I see...” he stated, voice calm and gentle.

“Yes...now you know how silly I am" you started, feeling tears rise in your eyes. “How silly I am to be in love with you. When I know I shouldn't".

“It's alright" Buck said reassuringly. “It happens...”

Those words hurt, like a slap to the face. Like he was trying to play it off, or sweep it under a rug. Like it didn't matter. Well it didn't, but some kind of assurance would have been nice. But in stead, Buck was keeping you at arms length over it. And it sparked different emotions in you; anger, frustration, hurt and sadness.

“You think I wanted this to happen? You think I, of all people, wanted to fall in love with you” you said with a strained voice. Tears in your eyes, which you were managing to hold back for now.

The look on Buck's face was like pity, how his eyes looked guilty and in despair. “(Y/N)...” his voice soft and weary.

“No Buck, don't" you held up a hand. “I don’t, can't hear it". A tear escaped and ran down your cheek. “I don't want to hear your kind words, as you let me down...I know you have Marge. And I shouldn't have let myself get carried away with being around you and Bucky. But you were both nice to me, the company that I needed. Yet I let my feelings get away from me...”

You dropped your hand, your shoulders slouching slightly as you looked down. Unable to face the gorgeous Major who'd stolen your heart. From the dashing smile, to his warm heart dancing with Meatball, and everything in between. Major Gale Cleven was the man of your dreams, but he belonged to another. A woman that Buck spoke fondly of on the nights when you had to bunker down as bombs went off near by. A woman that made you feel less than in just about every way, except being a nurse during the war.

“Marge is a lucky woman...” you stated with a small laugh. “You're lucky to have a woman like her waiting for you back home...no doubt you'll both be happy" you voice dropping at the end.

It was silent after that. You having said your piece, something that shouldn’t have been aired out, if it wasn’t for the other nurses. Buck was quiet because he was processing your words. Which struck a cord in him. And dare he say that he felt for you. Over this time together, bonded in the worst way, he had grown closer to you. He sort out your company and spirit, especially after returning from a mission that was tough. He revelled in your sunshine. Seeing you like this hurt his heart.

Neither knew what to say after all that. Buck had opened his mouth and closed it a few times. Hoping when he would go to speak the words would come to him, but there was nothing. He should have agreed with you, and said he appreciated your affections. But he couldn't. Because a small part of him liked this, and wanted it from you. And even a part of him at one point had entertained the idea of you.

But he let it be just that, a thought. He had a girl back home waiting, a sweet thing who wrote him letters and cared. Could he really lose that? Or juggle both? No, he wasn't that kind of guy. Yet Buck had feelings for you, that weren't entirely friendly.

“F-forget this ever happened Buck...” you said softly, so softly that Buck wondered if you spoke at all.

And with that, you took your leave. Heading back to your room. Back to solitude and your thoughts. It wasn't great, but its all you had till either people stopped being asses. Or the war was over. Which ever happened first.

[brunchable]

BIG DICK's Revenge | Bucky Barnes x f!reader.

Pairings: Boyfriend Bucky Barnes x f!reader Themes: Funny? Bucky performing his revenge with the help of Steve and Sam. Summary: It's been a while since you made Bucky wear the shirt that says, "BIG DICK, is back in town" Bucky wanted to wait until you've simmered down and tonight, was the night. He promised you it would be HELL and he kept that promise. A/N: Hah. . . my stomach hurts, I hope this is funny enough. I honestly don't know how to top the first one. A/N: This is the part 2 for BIG DICK's back in town.

Tags: @brnesblogposts @mrs-elsie-barnes @ilovetaquitosmmmm

It all started innocently enough on the night Bucky had Steve and Sam over for mens’ night. You’d come home from running errands, half expecting them to be huddled around the TV, but instead, you found Bucky lounging on the couch with that signature smirk on his face—the one that meant trouble was brewing.

"Hey, babe," he said casually, giving you a kiss on the cheek as you walked in. "I brought home a little something."

You turned, raising your eyebrows. "Brought home what?"

"Meet Shadow." He grinned wider, gesturing to the space beside him. 

"Shadow?" Your brows furrowed as you looked at the empty space.

"Yeah," Bucky said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Our new dog."

You stared at him for a moment, glancing back at the air he was pointing to. A smile tugged at the corner of your lips at first—you liked dogs—but when you looked again, your smile faded. Completely.

"Bucky, where is the dog?"

There was an edge to your voice now, a genuine confusion. Your brow furrowed, and you scanned the empty space beside him once more. You loved dogs—always had. The idea of a new pet had instantly excited you, but now there was nothing. No wagging tail, no soft fur, nothing. Just the strange, empty spot where Bucky insisted Shadow was.

Bucky raised an eyebrow, clearly still in full prank mode. "He’s right here, babe. Big guy, super chill."

But you couldn’t shake the unsettling feeling growing in your chest. Your excitement from moments ago dissolved, replaced by bewilderment and, for the first time, doubt.

You blinked in disbelief. “Bucky, I— I don’t see anything.”

Before Bucky could respond, Steve walked into the living room, grabbing a handful of popcorn. 

"Hey, what’s up?" he asked casually. Then, as if it were the most normal thing in the world, he bent down and petted… nothing. "Hey, Shadow! Who’s a good boy?"

You stared at him. "Steve… Do you see the dog too?"

Steve straightened up, looking at you like you were the one acting strange. 

"Uh, yeah? He’s right there." He glanced at Bucky, confusion on his face. "Why wouldn’t I see him?"

“Because there’s no dog!” you said firmly, your voice rising in frustration, the enthusiasm from earlier now gone, replaced by frustration and a tinge of hurt. Why couldn’t I see him?

Staring at what felt like thin air, you felt oddly excluded from something they were seeing, something you couldn’t.

Steve exchanged a glance with Bucky, and then Sam strolled in from the kitchen, carrying drinks for everyone. 

"Yo, what’s with the yelling?" He looked over at you, then down at the same empty space, before grinning. "Oh hey, Shadow. Who’s my boy?"

Your mouth fell open as you looked from Sam to Bucky to Steve. "Are you all messing with me?!" you demanded. "There’s no dog!"

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Uh… Y/N, are you messing with us?"

You froze. "What?"

Bucky leaned back on the couch, a playful smirk on his lips. "Yeah, babe, it’s starting to feel like you’re pranking us. I mean, come on. Shadow’s right here." 

He patted the air beside him, pretending to scratch an invisible dog’s head.

Steve nodded, "I get it, you’re trying to be funny, but don’t you think you’re taking it a little far?"

"Good one, though. Making us think you don’t see him? Classic." Sam chuckled, crossing his arms. Then Sam shook his head, glancing at Steve. "I mean, if she’s trying to prank us, this is commitment."

Steve nodded. "Yeah, she’s really selling it. I respect the effort, honestly."

You couldn’t believe it. 

"I’m not pranking anyone! There’s no dog!"

Bucky stood up, walking toward you, his face softening with concern. "Babe," he said gently, "we’re not messing with you. Shadow’s right here." He patted the empty air again, his expression as sincere as ever.

You groaned in frustration, burying your face in your hands. "You’re all insane!"

Steve raised an eyebrow at Bucky, "She’s really pushing this. Maybe it’s us who don’t get the joke."

Sam snorted, shaking his head. “Damn, Y/N, you’re good. You’ve got us all second-guessing ourselves now.”

You threw your hands up in defeat, but before heading off, you decided to get to the bottom of this. Who better to set things straight than Tony? He wouldn’t play along with something so ridiculous—he was a tech genius, and you figured he’d help you prove they were pranking you.

Without hesitation, you pulled out your phone and dialed Tony. The boys glanced at each other, their grins growing wider as you paced away from them.

After a couple of rings, Tony’s face popped up on your screen. He looked like he was in his lab, tinkering with something as always.

"Well, well, if it isn’t my favourite civilian," Tony greeted with a smirk. "What’s up, Y/N? Need some help fixing something Bucky broke?"

You wasted no time. 

"Tony, I need you to help me settle something. Bucky, Steve, and Sam are telling me there’s a dog here named Shadow. There’s no dog, right?"

You turned the camera toward the empty spot where the boys claimed Shadow was. You held your breath, fully expecting Tony to tell you what you already knew: there was no dog.

Tony looked up from his work and squinted at the screen. He wiped his hands on a towel, looking far more serious than you anticipated. 

"Wait… are you telling me you don’t see Shadow?"

Your heart dropped. "What?!"

Tony blinked at the screen, his brow furrowing. "Yeah, uh… that’s definitely a dog. Big one too. Looks like a scruffy mutt. Where the hell did Bucky get that thing?"

"Tony… no. Don’t mess with me. There’s no dog here!"

Tony raised an eyebrow, his face etched with confusion. "Y/N, I see the dog clear as day. You don’t? That’s… concerning."

Behind you, the boys were snickerin, and you heard Sam mutter something like, "Oh man, this is gold," as they tried not to burst out.

"See?" Bucky called out from behind you. "Even Tony sees him!"

You spun back to the phone, feeling your pulse quicken. "Tony, you’re not serious! You’re messing with me, right?"

Tony leaned back in his chair, glancing around casually. "Messing with you? I wish. But hey, maybe you need one of those eye scans I’ve been working on. Could be a fun side project. But seriously, Y/N, I see him. Maybe you’re just tired?"

Your mouth dropped open. "Tony, this isn’t funny!"

Tony’s expression didn’t change, though you swore there was a glint of amusement in his eyes. "I never joke about dogs, Y/N. You’re the one who’s missing out here. I’ll bring some Stark tech next time I visit—maybe we’ll figure out why you can’t see the pooch."

You felt like your world was tilting as Tony gave you a lazy wink and hung up, leaving you standing there, phone in hand, utterly dumbfounded.

You slowly turned back to the boys. Bucky leaned against the arm of the couch, his face a picture of calm satisfaction. 

"You’ve been ignoring Shadow all night, Y/N," Bucky said softly, as if he were genuinely concerned.

Without another word, you turned on your heel and marched toward the bedroom, muttering under your breath about needing to change into something more comfortable. You didn’t even look back as you disappeared down the hallway.

The moment you were out of sight, the living room erupted in soft snickers. Sam doubled over, shaking with barely contained laughter. Steve grinned, trying to keep it together, but his shoulders shook with amusement.

Bucky glanced toward the hallway where you had just gone, a mischievous smile tugging at his lips as he tried to hush the others. "Shh, shh, you’re gonna blow it!" he whispered, though he couldn’t suppress his own quiet chuckle.

× × × ×

Later that afternoon, you stood by the kitchen counter, cooking up some snacks for the boys, trying to get some peace, while they settled down for NBA 2K27 on the PS5. The sound of the game’s commentary filled the room, with Steve clearly fascinated by the graphics.

"You know," Steve began, pausing to admire the screen, "the PS5 has got to be one of the greatest inventions of all time."

Bucky laughed, glancing over. "Oh yeah? Even better than vibranium?"

Steve shrugged. "I mean, second close."

"I don’t know, Cap. I think you’re just impressed by anything with buttons." Sam leaned back, tossing his controller on the couch.

Steve gave him a mock glare. "Says the guy who can’t beat me in Rookie mode."

"Man, you know that’s because the controller’s busted." Sam’s face twisted in mock offence.

Bucky laughed before turning to you. "Hey, babe? Do you mind feeding Shadow? His food’s in the pantry."

"Sure, I’ll feed your dog." You rolled your eyes, playing along.

Bucky grinned as you disappeared into the kitchen. The second you were out of sight, the boys exchanged triumphant grins, their quiet laughter breaking out as they tried to keep their cool.

Just as they were all stifling their laughter, you suddenly reappeared in the doorway, eyeing them suspiciously. "What are you boys laughing at?"

The three of them immediately straightened up, coughing awkwardly, trying to mask their grins.

"Uh, nothing," Steve said, keeping his eyes glued to the screen. "Just, uh… Sam losing. Again."

"Hey!" Sam protested. "I told you, the controller—"

You glared at them, but decided to let it slide as you walked back into the kitchen.

As you rummaged through the pantry for the "dog food," Sam quietly followed behind you, grabbing a beer from the fridge. You could hear him open the can, but as he turned to leave, he suddenly froze mid-step.

"Aw, man!" Sam shouted, hopping on one foot. "Are you kidding me? I just stepped in Shadow’s poop!"

Your head snapped up as you stared at him, eyes wide with disbelief. "Sam, come on. There’s no poop."

“Y/N, I’m telling you,” he said, gesturing down at his imaginary dirty shoe, his face the perfect blend of disgust and frustration, "it’s right here! This is why I told Bucky he needs to walk him more."

"There’s nothing on your shoe, Sam." You stared at Sam, your sanity hanging by a thread.

Sam shook his head, rolling his eyes as if you were being difficult. "Okay, so now I’m imagining poop? Great. This just keeps getting better."

You groaned, storming back into the living room where Steve and Bucky were deep into the game. "This has gone on long enough!"

"What’s wrong, Y/N? Stepped in poop, too?" Steve didn’t even look away from the screen, chuckling. 

You shot him a glare. "There is no dog! And there is no poop! You guys have been messing with me!"

"Babe, you’re the one who’s been acting weird. We’ve been chillin’." Bucky said, shrugging.

"Yeah," Sam said, walking in with a dramatic limp, still acting like his shoe was covered in something. "Y/N’s the one who’s got some explaining to do. Trying to convince us Shadow’s not real? That’s cold."

You stood there, utterly baffled as the boys continued to snicker amongst themselves. Before you could even process what to say next, Bucky turned to you with that charming grin that always seemed to get him out of trouble.

"Babe," he said smoothly, "Shadow’s still waiting for his food. Poor guy’s probably starving by now."

You blinked at him, speechless. "Seriously?"

Bucky nodded earnestly, "Dead serious. He’s been a good boy, waiting this long. And hey, don’t worry about Sam stepping in... uh, ‘Shadow’s business,’ I’ll clean it up later."

"Seriously?!" You threw your hands up, feeling like you were trapped in some alternate reality where everyone else could see the invisible dog but you. "Bucky, there is no dog, and I’m not feeding an empty bowl! What is wrong with you guys?!"

Bucky gave you that soft, slightly pitying look again. "Babe, come on, you don’t have to keep this up for our sake. Shadow’s part of the family now, and he’s hungry. Just help him out, alright?"

You stared at him, feeling your resolve crumble as Steve and Sam both watched you with expectant looks, clearly trying not to burst into laughter again. Part of you wanted to storm out of the room, but the other part just wanted this insane night to end.

You sighed dramatically. "Fine! I’ll feed your dog."

Bucky grinned victoriously as you stomped back into the kitchen, yanking the pantry door open and grabbing the "dog food." The boys were behind you, and you could practically feel their stifled amusement as you begrudgingly poured kibble into the bowl.

"There," you said with a huff, placing the bowl on the floor. "Happy now?"

"Thanks, babe," Bucky called out, still trying to suppress his laughter. "Shadow really appreciates it."

You glared at him. "Mhm, I’m sure he does."

Bucky glanced down at the empty space on the floor, making a show of looking impressed. "Wow, look at him go. He’s really chowing down."

Sam joined in, nodding seriously. "He was probably starving. Poor guy."

× × × × 

You sat on the couch, flipping through your phone, pretending to be engrossed while Bucky, Steve, and Sam played another round of NBA. But the whole time, you felt their eyes occasionally drift toward you, like they were waiting for something.

Then, just as you started to relax, Bucky’s voice cut through the room.

"Hey, babe," he called out, casually, "Do you mind grabbing Shadow’s leash from the closet? I think he needs to go out."

You blinked, glancing up from your phone. Shadow’s leash. The words hung in the air like a taunt. Your first instinct was to snap back, to refuse, to end this ridiculous charade once and for all. But then you hesitated. They had been so relentless, so convincing all afternoon, and part of you just wanted to get through it.

"Sure," you muttered, standing up with a sigh. "Let me grab it."

The second you said it, you regretted it. 

You knew this would only fuel their sick joke, but you were in too deep now. If you refused, they’d only mock you more. And worse, that tiny voice in the back of your mind—the one that wondered if you were actually the one missing something—pushed you forward.

You walked over to the closet, yanking the door open. There, hanging neatly on a hook, was a leash. You couldn’t believe they had gone this far.

"Got it," you mumbled, grabbing the leash and walking back into the living room.

Bucky grinned, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he watched you. "Thanks, babe. Shadow appreciates it."

You rolled your eyes but played along. "Yeah, sure."

As you held the leash in your hand, you glanced down at the empty spot where Shadow was supposed to be. For a split second, you hesitated, wondering how far you should take this. But then, with a resigned sigh, you bent down and clipped the leash onto… nothing.

"There you go, boy," you said, trying to sound casual as you stood up, holding the other end of the leash. "Ready for your walk?"

Bucky grinned, leaning back on the couch. "Enjoy your bonding time with Shadow!" he called out, waving his hand nonchalantly as you headed toward the door.

You opened the front door and stepped outside, gripping the leash in one hand as you walked out of the house, dragging it behind you.

“I can’t believe I’m walking thin air.” You mumbled angrily.

As the door clicked shut behind you, the boys immediately jumped up from the couch and raced to the window, carefully parting the curtains just enough to peek outside. They pressed close, their shoulders bumping as they struggled to keep their laughter in check.

There you were, outside on the sidewalk, casually strolling along with an empty leash trailing behind you. That’s when you started noticing people.

A man walking his actual dog came to an abrupt stop, his brow furrowed as he stared at you. His dog sniffed the air, seemingly confused by the leash you were holding, but then the man gave you a polite nod—though his eyes clearly conveyed the What the fuck? expression.

Behind the window, the boys were silently losing it. Sam covered his mouth with his hands, his body trembling with laughter, while Bucky leaned so close to the window, he was practically pressing his face against it.

A group of teenagers on bikes rode past you, slowing down as they spotted the leash trailing behind you. One of them leaned over to his friend, pointing at the leash. 

They giggled to each other before one of them shouted, "Hey lady, where’s your dog?"

You felt a surge of embarrassment but kept your head high, trying to ignore the growing crowd of puzzled onlookers. 

"He’s right here," you said stubbornly, pointing down at the invisible dog. "His name’s Shadow."

The teenagers blinked, clearly not expecting a response, before laughing and riding off, shaking their heads."Oh man, did you hear that?" he gasped between laughs. "She’s talking to Shadow!"

× × × ×

After what felt like the most bizarre walk of your life, you finally returned to the house, gripping the empty leash.

You opened the door, stepped inside, and unclipped the leash from thin air.

"There you go, boy," you muttered, "Good walk, huh?”

The room was dead silent. No laughter, no snickering—just… silence. You looked up, expecting to see the boys grinning, but instead, they were all staring at you, wide-eyed, as if you were the one who had lost it.

Steve broke the silence first, his voice laced with concern. "Uh, Y/N? What… what are you doing?"

Your heart skipped a beat. "What do you mean?" you asked cautiously.

Bucky furrowed his brow, looking genuinely confused, “Why are you holding a dog leash?”

Your breath caught in your throat. "What?”

“The dog leash—who are you talking to?” Bucky repeated, standing up from the couch, his expression completely serious.

You blinked, your grip tightening on the leash. "No. No, no, no. Don’t do this. You’ve been telling me all afternoon that there is a dog. You’ve all been talking about Shadow."

Steve and Sam exchanged a worried glance, "Y/N, we never said there was a dog. You’ve been acting like there’s one all night."

Your stomach twisted into knots as their faces remained serious, and the playful atmosphere from earlier had completely vanished. 

"You’re messing with me," you said, your voice shaking. "You’ve been messing with me all night! You said there was a dog!"

Bucky shook his head, stepping closer to you. "Babe, I think you’ve been imagining things. There’s no dog. There’s never been a dog."

You stared at him, your pulse racing. "No. No, you’re lying. You said his name was Shadow! I fed him, Sam stepped on his—”

Desperation clawing at your mind, you bent down again and reached out, pretending to pet the air. "I’m petting him right now," you said firmly, your hand hovering over nothing, trying to prove a point, trying to see something—anything—that would make this madness stop.

Steve tilted his head, his eyes concerned. "Y/N… why are you petting the air?"

Your hand froze mid-motion, your breath catching in your chest. "What? I’m petting…”

“Heh… heuh—” Sam tried to hold it together, but a strangled laugh escaped his lips. He quickly looked away, trying to cover his mouth.

Suddenly, all three of them broke. It started as a low chuckle from Sam, but laughter was contagious and it escalated into full-blown laughter. Sam doubled over, sinking down onto the couch, howling, clutching his stomach as tears of laughter welled up in his eyes. He sheslapped Steve on the arm repeatedly as he gasped for breath.

"Oh, man!" Sam wheezed, trying to speak through his laughter. "I can’t—I can’t breath!"

Steve wasn’t faring much better. He had collapsed back onto the couch, laughing so hard that his face turned into a tomato. He covered his face with one hand while the other pounded the cushion next to him.

Bucky leaned against the wall, biting his lip in an effort to suppress his laughter, but when he saw Steve and Sam in tears, he couldn’t help it. He doubled over, shaking with laughter, holding his sides as he struggled to speak.

"Oh, babe," he said between wheezes, "you should’ve seen your face!"

You stood there, frozen, the leash still dangling from your hand. You blinked, your heart still pounding from the shock of their sudden shift, and then—finally—it hit you. The sheer absurdity of it all. The way they had committed to the prank so fully, the ridiculousness of pretending there was a dog named Shadow, and now the complete reversal.

A part of you wanted to scream at them, but another part of you—against all logic—found yourself biting back a smile. It was too much. Too ridiculous.

Sam had slid onto the floor by now, still laughing uncontrollably as he leaned against the couch. "Shadow! Oh my god, I can’t believe you actually started feeding him. . .and, and took him for a walk!" he managed to get out between fits of giggles, wiping his eyes.

Steve wasn’t much better, leaning back with his hands on his face, laughing so hard he could barely breathe. "The look on her face when she clipped the leash onto nothing!" he cried, his shoulders shaking.

“You know what? You three deserve each other. You guys are assholes,” you muttered, shaking your head, a grin threatening to break through your stern expression.

Bucky, still laughing, walked over and gently took the leash from your hand, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "Babe, I can’t believe you actually started thinking there might be a dog."

"Are you kidding me?" you shot back, crossing your arms. "You were all so convincing! You had me second-guessing myself all night."

Sam wiped away another tear as he climbed back up onto the couch, still chuckling. "Hey, that’s the art of a good prank. We had to go all in!"

Steve nodded, still trying to catch his breath. "Yeah, we didn’t expect you to actually start playing along with the leash thing. That was the cherry on top."

You glared at them, though you couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across your face now. "I hate you guys."

Bucky pulled you into a hug, still grinning ear to ear. "You love us, and you know it."

You huffed, but leaned into his embrace anyway. "Yeah, well, you better watch your back. This isn’t over."

Bucky chuckled, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "Bring it on. I’m ready."

Sam pointed a finger at you, still smirking. "Yeah, and don’t think we’ll forget this!"

"Shut up, Wilson," you shot back, shaking your head.

But as you stood there, wrapped in Bucky’s arms, surrounded by the laughter and teasing of your friends, you couldn’t help but laugh along with them. It was ridiculous, and you had fallen for it, but in the end, it was exactly what you expected from them.

“You’re sleeping on the couch tonight,” you mumbled through your smile, your tone making it clear there was no room for negotiation.

Bucky opened his mouth, about to defend himself, but you cut him off with a raised hand. “Nope. Don’t even try. Couch. Tonight.”

And one thing was for sure—this prank war was far from over.

[fools-ramblings-and-whatnot]

Fool's Rambling #29:Will you leave me for 1 million thaumarks?

There's this new Kdrama where the female lead accepts the bribe of the mother in law to leave her son.

And I just think it would be funny for Yuu if it were the same.

Premise, feeling bored, Yuu watched a new TV show and got an idea to play a prank with their boyfriend.

Yuu: Ask me if I will leave you for 1 million thaumarks.

Twst boy: What??!

.

.

.

Riddle: Will you leave me for 1 million thaumarks???*questions the question*

Yuu: No I won't!

Riddle:*smiles*

Yuu: Unless tax is excluded, too.

Riddle: OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!

.

.

.

Leona:This is stupid.

Yui: Just say it!!!

Leona:*sighs* Will you leave me for 1 million thaumarks?

Yuu: No, you're way more richer than that!

Leona:Damn right I am.

.

.

.

Azul: Will you leave me for 1 million thaumarks?

Yuu: Never, but I will leave you for 5 million.

Azul: That's my entrepreneur!

Yuu:Haha! I thought you'd be sad on the prospect I'll leave you.

Azul: Incorrect. You may leave me, but who says "I" will leave you? We are bound by a contract of love. Your money is my money.

Yuu:Greedy.

.

.

.

Jamil: I'd leave you for a goodnight's rest...

Yuu: Hey!You were suppose to say the question to me! *sulks*

Jamil: *sighs*Yeah yeah...will you leave me for 1 million thaumarks?

Yuu: Never, I love your cooking too much. I literally can't live without you.

Jamil:*proud smirk*

.

.

.

Vil: What a stupid game.

Yuu: Come on, just say it.

Vil: *raises an eyebrow* Hmph..you're better off doing something else. And I already know you'd never leave me for money so meager

Yuu: So you think I'd leave you for a higher amount?

Vil:*clicks his tongue* You better not, you should know what's good for you *stares at Yuu has offended him already*

Yuu: Yes yes...sorry, Vil. Of course not, you're my #1. The best thing in my world money can't buy.

Vil: Don't patronize me, darling.Besides, you can't buy anything, you're broke.

Yuu: Ouch, reality check.

.

.

.

Idia:Is this one of those dumb TV show tropes?

Yuu: So what if it was? Come on, ask me.

Idia: *sighs* Will you leave me for 1 million thaumarks?

Yuu: I'd leave you right now for free.

Idia:...

Yuu: I'm joking...Don't give me that look

*Spends hours consoling him*

.

.

.

Malleus: I'd never leave you for all the riches of the world, beloved.

Yuu: Wait, no. YOU ask ME.

Malleus: Oh? Why should I? Are you thinking of it? Leaving me for such a petty sum?

Yuu: No!!! Ofcourse not.

Malleus:*teasing* So a higher sum, then?

Yuu: NO SUM AT ALL!!!*blushes because they realized they were teased*

Malleus: Good to hear, my love. But just in case, let me remind you...*drops several jewels into their hands* That leaving me would be foolish,for I can even offer you the stars if you wish, so perish the thought.

[holylulusworld]

Every breath you take (16)

Summary: There is a shadow following you. He doesn’t know what he got himself into.

Pairing: Stalker!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Warnings: a man out of time, secret admirer trope, “crazy” reader, fluff

A/N: You all made me do it! Here’s the series to this random idea: Stalker Bucky & Crazy Reader

Catch up here: Every breath you take (15)

Every Breath You Take Masterlist

Bucky hates this. He hates leaving you alone after only two days of living together. Sam called for help, and so as not to ruin the chance of getting happy with you, he must play along. Bucky cannot let Sam know he kidnapped you.

“Bucky,” you coo while hugging him tightly. You snuggle in his chest and sigh. “You’re going to be careful. Do not leave me and Alpine all alone. Kitty will eat me if I’m too depressed to get up because you didn’t come back.”

“What?” He hiccups, shocked at your words. “I’d never leave you all alone, doll. I’ll be back soon. Sam needs my help, is all.”

“You still must be careful. I don’t want you to get hurt,” you place your hands on his chest and give him your sweetest pout. “We just moved in together, Bucky baby. Your doll needs you to come back to her.”

He hums as you stare up at him as if he’s the sun, moon, stars, and the whole fucking universe to him. You smile softly and run your hands over his chest, taking the chance to feel Bucky up.

“I’m going to miss you,” you whine. “I’ll think about you all the time.” Now you pucker your lips. “Especially when I touch myself.”

“No!”

“No?” You gasp when his features harden. “No more touching yourself.” You’re taken aback by his angry tone. “You’re mine. Only I’ll bring you pleasure from now on.”

Your cheeks heat up, but you don’t want him to take away your pleasure. “What if I think about you while touching my sweet pussy?”

“Baby doll,” he purrs your name. Bucky cups your chin, holding it in a tight grip. Not hard enough to hurt, but to make his strength known. “No touching yourself. You’ll be a good girl and wait for me to return.” He pecks your lips, smirking against your soft pillows. “If you’re being good, you’ll get a surprise when I’m back.”

You fist his jacket while moaning his name against his lips. “Okay. I’ll be good,” you whisper lowly. “Alpine too. I’ll make sure Fluffy Ball is going to be a good cat.”

He laughs when Alpine sits next to you, meowing loudly. “Punk, no stealing my socks.” He looks at you one last time before he turns to leave. “And no funny business for you, doll.”

“Yes, Sir. Mr. Bucky, sir,” you giggle playfully. “I’ll be so good for you. Oh, I can put my orchids on the windowsills. I’ll just decorate the whole house to make it cozier for us. I got all those nice pillows and blankets.”

“Do as you wish, doll,” Bucky pecks your temple. “If you need my help, there’s a phone on the nightstand. You can only call one number, my number, but I’ll be right there.”

“I know,” you sigh dreamily. “Now go and save the world, my hero. Alpine and I are on house guarding duty.” You salute as you watch Bucky leave.

For a moment, looking at the phone on the nightstand makes you feel uneasy. You don’t know why. This is what you wanted—for Bucky to take you away from your life. Still, only being able to call him, and no one else, doesn’t feel right.

You’re not going to leave Bucky. He’s the man you want, and you’re in for the long haul. Why can’t he trust you? You willingly came with him without making a fuss. Any other woman would’ve screamed and fought tooth and nail.

Shaking your head, you sigh. No. Bucky tries to keep you safe, that’s all. He’s not trying to lock you away or keep you hostage.

Sooner than later, he’ll see that you love him and that you want to stay with him.

Alpine jumps onto the couch, bumping his head into your thigh. “Hey, sweetie,” you coo. “Do you want to watch the movie with me?”

The white cat meows loudly before jumping on your lap to get comfortable. It’s been only a few hours since Bucky left, but you already feel alone without him.

“What kind of movie do you like?” You pat Alpine’s back, gently running your hand over his fur. “Why does Bucky call you punk? You’re such a nice and well-behaved cat.”

While Alpine gets comfortable on your lap, you switch through the channels, looking for a distraction. No show or movie picks your interest because you’re worried about Bucky and, even more, about you and Alpine. What if he doesn’t come back? No one knows where you are.

“That looks good, right?” You glance at Bucky sitting next to your feet. He watches you place another orchid on the windowsill. “What do you think, Alpine? The light is perfect.”

Alpine isn’t a big help. He just meows and looks cute, but you are happy for his company. “Hmm... maybe we should ask Bucky when he comes back. He leaves here too, and I want him to feel comfortable and happy.”

“What’s the matter, Sam? Why did you call me in the middle of the night?” Bucky frowns because Sam leads him straight toward your abandoned apartment. “Sam?”

“A colleague of your friend called and reported her missing. Y/N, the girl you asked out, quit her job out of the blue, and no one has seen her for a few days. Her talkative colleague mentioned a stalker.”

Bucky feels his stomach tighten. This is the worst-case scenario. Sam is investigating your disappearance. Damn it. Bucky believed he covered up all traces. He even booked a flight for you with your credit card.

“Anything yet?” He asks, hoping Sam can’t hear the panic in his voice. “She’s a nice girl, and I don’t want anything to happen to her.”

“So far, it looks like she packed her bags, quit her job, and booked a flight to Fiji,” Sam explains. “When did you last see her?” He watches Bucky furrow his brows.

“On our date. You remember I had to cancel my plans with her for you. After that, she told me that we couldn’t see each other right now. I had the feeling she wasn’t interested in me. Bucky plays his role well. He shrugs and sighs deeply. “Maybe I didn’t talk enough, or I talked too much.”

“Man, sometimes it just doesn’t work out,” Sam says as he picks your lock. “Let’s have a look around her place. I bet she wanted to escape her life for a while.”

Bucky nods; it’s all he can do. He only hopes he didn’t leave any trace leading to him...

Tags in reblog.

[starsisstars]

Pointless ISAT Headcanons

Hi I have to get up for opening shift tomorrow but who CARES it's time for headcanons. Except not the normal or angsty ones, it's goofy ridiculous hours ONLY. (Please send me more goofy niche headcanons I want to consume silly details like candy.) Filled with spoilers despite the sillies.

Bonnie invents potato chips 10 years after the end of the game after many failed attempts to make Sif like potatoes (Sif LOVES their chips, so this is Bonnie's win in the end).

Immortality fiction is super popular in Vaugarde because they're witnesses to change over decades but are prevented from changing themselves. Tragic wisemen usually. This got way less popular post-King.

Teachers get paid good wages in Vaugarde because they help kids through the period of the most change in their lives.

I think it's so funny everyone in fanfic thinks Sif sleeps in trees. It's universal and y'know what? Sure. I'm adopting that. Y'all had me scrolling through dialogue for ages just to make sure I didn't miss any tree nap mentions.

Loop spent the majority of Sif's first run through Dormont and the House training their voice so that it wouldn't be a dead giveaway to their identity when Sif showed up. They wanted it to sound like Odile. It does not even a little bit.

Mira is RED. Bonnie is ORANGE/YELLOW/BLUE. Odile is PURPLE. Isa is GREEN/BROWN. Sif and Loop are MONOCHROME.

Mira has a notebook FILLED with edgy poetry from when she was small. She buried it somewhere but knows exactly where it is and once every couple years digs it up just to make sure nobody found it.

Bon is a reptile person. Wants a bearded dragon as a pet.

Mwudu is Acadia (in the same way Vaugarde is France, etc.). Not a colony of Vaugarde or anything though, just a lot of cultural exchange. (Vaugarde is NOT imperialistic.)

Post-canon Sif sometimes has such a tight grip on Isa in his sleep that Isa can get up and walk around with them still latched onto him. One morning Isa even brushed his teeth and styled his hair before the Sif on his back woke up.

Nille is swole af. Taller than Odile too. I like it when people give her a braid.

I changed my mind; everyone has really ugly colors because they can't see them and they all look terrible. I do not care about the practicalities of more colorful dyes being difficult to obtain; this is fantasy logic and I say they all should cause eyestrain.

Sif's all-black look under the cloak and hat (both of which he didn't choose) is the only good fashion choice they're capable of making. If you ask them to get creative it's a disaster. Isa indulges this anyways because hell yeah fashion disaster rights, but Sif will inevitably ask for help once he actually sees the design in person.

Isa was a hardcore STEM person, while Odile was properly studying anthropology/writing but is actually SUPER into linguistics.

Fishermen from the Forgotten Country were given additional pathways to easy fishing crabs on Vaugarde's shore because Vaugarde didn't want 'em. The overfishing caused a minor ecological crisis that was then fixed by Wish Craft.

Pre-canon Sif tried to make some money via an eating competition in one of the unnamed countries but was so uncomfortable with the attention from winning first place they refused to ever step foot in the country again. They don't even remember why they refuse to visit anymore but still don't wanna go. It wasn't even that big a contest nor a big deal emotionally long-term (like the party would suspect) for Sif, they're just stubborn.

Since we have a classic RPG setup I think the party's inventory is not limited by logic and they carry around 78 tents and 23 cottages somehow.

[f1ghtsoftly]

my head is scrambled but in Kate Manne’s “The Logic Of Misogyny” she put to words something I always, always knew was true.

Most of the time Men don’t hurt women for no reason, they punish women who assert themselves/their personhood. Misogynistic violence is a punishment, it’s a form of conditioning to get women to behave submissively towards men. To punish women for existing in public without male protection. To punish women for daring to think her intellect, athletic or artistic achievement could come before her sex.

I don’t present super femme anymore or hang around men outside my family basically ever-but when I did I was frequently targeted for sexual assault, usually by men who were frustrated they were attracted to me but couldn’t have me. They felt like I was taunting them-but asserting my right to exist as someone they were attracted to/without any sort of male protection or a male protection that didn’t involve sexual favors/submission. That wasn’t an accident, I’m sure if I meekly cowered behind a big boyfriend, I’m sure if I stayed inside, I’m sure if I didn’t assert myself as extraverted, intelligent, funny or charismatic those men would have left me alone-but that would have meant hiding myself from the world, hiding myself from other women and to me that was a bigger loss than a ‘lil danger. I made choices as a young person that I knew with certainty would bring me in closer proximity to men who wanted to hurt me, I decided that living a freer life was better than living a safe one. I don’t necessarily regret my assessment of patriarchy, I am sad that the price you pay for being an independent woman (in a social sense) in public is assault. I don’t blame women who think their safety is more important than making a statement. I’m sad for us both. I’m grateful I was able to find feminist communities because victimization isn’t just something casual you can shake off, even if it feels like men constantly target you/women in general.

Assault doesn’t just roll of your back either. It hurts. In the moment and for years afterwards it hurts. It’s always senseless. Always dehumanizing to the extreme. Always enraging. Always profoundly violating. Always a shock. I struggle to reconcile what I know about rape with what I know about people. I know people can be cruel, unthinking, insecure. I don’t know how someone can plot the rape of a friend or a stranger who has done nothing to deserve it. I don’t know how men can secretly tape their lovers, manipulate a young woman into sex she doesn’t want or do any of the things men do consistently or routinely. I don’t know how a boy could look at the face of his too drunk friend and go “this is my opportunity to have my way with her” instead of putting her to bed. Carelessness, thoughtless is easy to imagine. Conscious cruelty is not. Men know what they do and they either don’t care or like it.

I’m crying in a park in my Dad’s pickup truck. “There are worse things than this, you didn’t die-you’re alive” He says “this wasn’t your fault, I just want to keep you safe and what happened to you isn’t something I can control even though I wish I could”. “I’d feel better if you lived in Austin, because their self defense laws are better, there are lots of gay people there too”

He makes me laugh. I won’t move to Texas. He’s right, it’s not my fault, and helping me get better at self defense helps him feel like he can do something and while self defense does help-it’s not a perfect strategy. The misogynist’s prerogative is to snuff out the life force of the woman he interacts with, the only way to stop him from trying to do that is to become apart of the living dead. Even then, he’ll get your corpse.

There are worse things than rape in this life. A woman alive is better than a woman dead. I guess, but what life is it when constantly forced to battle for your right to live? When at a moments notice you can be filled from the inside out with death. Rotted from your insides out. I wish New York would let me have a gun. I wish I could make men afraid and polite in my presence the way I feel afraid and polite in theirs. I’m so tired of this.

[ladyisabelsblade]

My Live Reactions to X-Men Origins: Wolverine

A text thread between me and my friend.

---

Just watched the opening sequence and it’s so fucking funny when you’re high

Dude that guy with the two guns, his sequence kind of slapped

And then the other guy punched a tank. Yo….

This Deadpool looks like an idiot with the swords but he’s still pretty funny lol

Why does he know Swahili?????

Oh no! They’re colonizers!!???

But not Wolverine, he cares about black people, that’s how you can tell he’s the good guy

Little brother, breaking cycles of abuse

JIMMY

--wolverine says racism is wrong! --have u seen his cartoon claws yet?

They didn’t look that bad but I am high so I don’t care

The action sequences aren’t half as bad as in last stand

Or at least I’m too high to notice if they are lol

WOAH SGIRT OFF

--u see a lot of hugh jackman nipples

Lumberjack Wolverine, wow

Just wow he’s wow

"Your country needs you” “I’m Canadian”

Aw, I like this girl. She’s so gonna die

What the fuck is this stupid story?

Even Logan thinks it’s stupid.

Most clumsily overt foreshadowing ever

Oop, yep she dying

--lmao --yea she lasts under 10 mins thats hilarious

Damn fucking eviscerated

Manly man scream

He ruthless

LMFAOOOO AND THEN HE GETS HIT BY A TRUCK

--relatable tbh

He’s so oiled up

Damn the dramatic irony is dramatic irony-ing

The Adamantium looks like the aftermath of a lush bath bomb

--ooooh ur not at the cartoon claws yet --he’s still all boney

Yee

LMAOOOO THEY LOOK PLASTIC

HIS ASS OUT

--ASS ASS ASS

Cover up your tits you preening slut precursor

They look so stupid just do practical effects you idiots

YES THE JACKET

WHAAAAATTTT HOW COULD YOU KILL THAT OLD LADY WTF

I should have seen that coming

EXPLOSIONS SLAY QUEEN

--who exploded things?

Everyone but Logan exploding the helicopter was slay queen

--lol this movie is such a blur for me, i love reexperiencing in real time

Oh this is the bad part

Fucking blob omg

--ah yes --and will i am

I like will I am he ain’t bad

And boxer Logan, boxer Logan is saving this scene for me

--idr him good or bad, i just remember he's will i am

He is

I laughed so hard when his name came up during the opening credits

--its a great jumpscare

Local man discovers his girlfriend was fridged for his character development

REMY LA BOU

OH NO HES HOT

--is this the first time uv seen gambit in something? like have u seen him in the cartoons or stuff?

and poker? This is like combining every old lady white woman’s wet dream together: lumberjack, boxer, poker player

No I’ve never seen the cartoons man

--by far the most loved x-man

GRABBED HIM BY THE SPINE WHAT THE DUCK

gambit slays here dude

Will I am dead

--u have the best one liners omg

I’m over an hour in and I’m really enjoying this movie, being high is really elevating my experience

--its probably greaat high ngl

It’s just like fun moment after fun moment, I don’t care if it doesn’t make sense

--its my dad's favorite hated movie --its so fun

He’s right, I can’t believe you told me this was worse than last stand

--idr last stand at all ngl

Oh, well it was really bad

My man is more okay with jumping out of a plane than flying in one

SCOTT

YOUR EYES SCOTT

sir this is an operating room you can’t be here

Damn, this is freaky, I thought Stryker was a creep in x2

KAYLAS BACK

WHAT THE FUCK

oh it’s mystique isn’t it

NO ITS NOT WHAT THE FUCK

Damn that’s cold

No, poor baby he’s so sad

They were together for 6 years damn

Yo this is so dope

This fight

--have u gotten to deadpool

Kayla, now is not the time

Not yet

--thats THE thing

I know

But here he comes

HE LOOKS SO STUPID

XAVIER MY MAN

Yo the black around the eyes thing kind of slayed tho

Damn fucking sliced his head off

Oh shit damn

Do they look out for eachother because you kind of suck ass victor

YESSSSS GAMBIT

Kayla come on don’t die

Again

HOLY SHIT STRYJER

AYO WHAT THE FUCK

girl this movies good I don’t know what you’re talking about

That was so slay Kayla

But you’re still probably dying

PROFESSOR

I LOVE YOU EVEN THIUGH YOURE BADLY CGIED

LNAO THE MUTANTS RUNNING AWAY

he don’t even remember her that’s so fucking sad dude

damn wtf tear my heart out why don’t ya

This movies cheesy but it’s hitting all the right beats

Like this is a pretty good origin story movie

Probably a horrible stand alone movie, but if I pretend like I’m watching a bunch of flashbacks stitched together it’s pretty good

Oooo two post credits scenes

LMAO TEASING A DEADPOOL COMEBAJX BUT HE NEVER DOES

--he kiinda does

In Deadpool 2?

--yea lol

Comes back just to die

--good

lol he wasn’t too bad but I think I’d have a different opinion if he was sober and there weren’t already two other great Deadpool movies

[island-babys-blog]

🌺 Mini Beach Stories Ep 4 🌺

Characters: Male Morticia Addams x Yandere black reader

Author's Note: I see a lot of genderbending Wednesday Addams, but what about gender-bend Morticia Addams 😏

Synopsis: Wednesday feeling curious, wondered how her psychopathic loved-obsessed Mother got with her freak-of-nature Father at Nevermore Academy. So why not tell her the whole love story?

Morticia sips his black coffee on the couch of their unique home, watching the rain pour from the sky. He savors its bitter taste. He smiles lovely at the sky, "What a miserable day it is." An appearance of Wednesday appears in Morticia's vision as he watches a thunder strike the sky

" Father, I have something to discuss with you," Wednesday says soullessly as her brown skin shows proudly as each thunder strikes. Morticia stands up and looks at Wednesday, "What is it mi belladonna mortal?" he asks.

Wednesday takes a deep breath and then speaks." How did you meet your mother? Did you kidnap her or chain her up" Mortica smiles and chuckles at his daughter "No, mi belladona mortal, I couldn't have snatched her when she caught me herself" He sighs heavily as a heavy blush spreads across his pale skin.

"The way your mother trapped me in her web, Wednesday, she was like a spider" Mortica cradles his daughter's face. " I have never been loved like that, not even my parents love me like that, she made me feel like I was the only shark in the ocean, she treated me like a king" The blush on Morticia's pale skin is a rare display of vulnerability and deep affection. It signifies the profound impact that Wednesday's mother had on him, revealing a softer side beneath his typically stoic exterior.

“ Let me tell you the story, our love story”

* Morticia Past *

As he closed the locker, a young Morticia, with dark hair reaching his back, hollowed cheekbones, and black eyeshadow, wearing the purple with black striped nevermore uniform, along with his gothic boots. Grabbing his books Mortica moved to his next class not noticing two pairs of eyes staring at him from afar

“ Oh Gomez isn’t he perfect, like a black rose in a garden” you said clutching your books to your chest dark skin glowing, as your curly hair stopped below your chin eyes almost forming heart-shaped pupils the longer you stared at him. Talking to your friend. Gomez was a pretty handsome boy himself with gressy parted hair and a gap between his teeth.

“ I guess but aren’t you allergic to roses” He says with a raised eyebrow. Gomez knew about your obsession with the boy, but being a good friend it never bothered him but it did make him worry when you would hurt yourself in the process to make the tall boy to notice you.

“Do you think he will notice me if I leave him a note with some roses” You spin around looking at Gomez with childlike eyes.

“ it could work, but y/n you are deadly allergic to roses why not bring him a dead bird,” he says grinning like a madman

“ I did, but he gave it to some guy that was harassing him as a threat, which was pretty funny…" Too bad they couldn't find his body” you chuckle

“ Didn’t it take you hours to blend up the body,” Gomez says as he remembers you told him before

“ I did. but that doesn’t matter anymore. All I know is Project Win Morticia's heart is still a go, and you gonna help me right Gomez?” You say with a smile and dark undertone, but your eyes tell another story that creeps Gomez out a little

“ pshh, right...right” Gomez waves you off, heading to class, shoving his hands in his pockets as you giddly smile and plan to win Morticias heart

In Mrs. Ivy's homeroom, her room was filled with plants of all sorts from poisonous to carnivorous, Walking to his sit Morticia looked at the class plant that was set out for a project, a live venus flytrap that was the size of a head, purred at him smelling his scent and whined wanting another snack that mortica would sneak into class.

Scratching the plant softly, Morticia moved his head seeing a bouquet of black roses and a note attached to it

Dear mi amor oscuro

In your darkest hour, in the blackest night… think of me…and I will be with you. Always For where else could you go? When I saw you, flowers started growing in the darkest parts of my mind.

Love to death Your secret admirer

Feeling his face become hot, thoughts rushed to his head. Who could this be? Who wrote this? Is this a prank? Does someone…love me? Deep in his thoughts, he didn’t notice the paper being snatched from his hand by some bullies

“ Aww, look at this little Morticia got a love note..what.a.freak” the bully slowly sounded out with a disgusting smile on his face as the rest of the goons laughed, as some pulling on his hair, ripping the note and others stomping on the flowers.

“ You think someone would love a freak weirdo like you... You a nobody whose parents doesn't even love” one of the bullies says walking away and leaving to sit down as the class gets ready to start leaving a sorrowful Morticia with single tear running down his face, hair creating a barrier to shield is crys from onlookers that saw the scene

Not noticing a deadly smile on Gomez's face, knowing the doom that would soon fall upon the group of boys when he tells You, the soon-to-be lover of the sad Morticia Addams what happened today in class.

It was the end of the day, and school was close to ending, Mortica stayed behind the last one out, still feeling mournful over the loss of his flowers and precious note that someone left behind. Almost heading out the door, he heard a hunting scream that gave him goosebumps. Furrowing his eyebrows, he walks closer, seeing a closed door with what seems to be…leaking blood. From underneath.

Bringing his shakey hands toward the doorknob, hearing the door unclick from the lock. Pushing the door slightly but all the way to see the unsettling horror of what occurred

The display shook Morticia to the bones, the bodies of the boys were laid all across the room with their eyes open permanently in horror as their mouths held a frozen scream trying to get away from something…something terrifying.

Morticia gasped in shock, hearing a voice you turned around away from the boy that you just killed, getting ready to kill the next victim that dared show there face to you.

Turing your head you meet with the eyes of Morticia, feeling as if a bucket of ice dumped over you. Tears start pooling your eyes as you try to save yourself, save your image of a good girl who could do nothing wrong.

“ Morticia, w-what are you doing here” You dropped the knife hand dipped in the blood of the bullies and face splattered in blood walking slowly to Morticia as he slowly took steps back “ I-I can explain please, it's not what it looks like”

You were freaking out and Morticia could see it. Your eyes globbed with tears as you try to cover yourself from him like you were hiding your darkest secrets from him. Blabbing to him as you try to explain to him.

But all Morticia could hear was the sound of his heartbeat and the heavy breathing that he was producing.

You killed his bullies…you killed his enemies…you care for him…you must love him right,,,

It didn’t take long for Morticia to realize that it was you all along that gave him those eccentric gifts, the note the flowers even seeing the harsh red rash on your palms.

His face bloomed into a heavy blush as he walked towards you. You still hid from him as tears rolled from your eyes but feeling warm arms wrap around you and a head buried in your neck. Feeling his hot breath on your ear, as you hear him speak in his deep monotone voice that made your body as if it was being lit on fire.

“ Oh my mi araña venenosa, it was you…how could you love a person like me? "” he moaned, tightening his grip on you, a clear sign that he was never letting you go

“ Oh Morticia, mi amor oscuro, you have no idea. I want you to spill me open, to dig your fingers in and pry open my ribs, lick my heart and my blood and bones. Pick open my bones and suck out the marrow. I want to be devoured by you. I could never live without you. My body could never handle not having you at a moment. We were meant to be, you know that, right?” You purred in his ear as he studdered, your body burned with need it felt like agony, but your heart melted with happiness expressing your love to Mortica

Taking his head from your neck, you grabbed his face staining it with blood, smashing your lips with his feeling his hand grip your waist deliciously as he opened his mouth wider as if he was pushing himself further into your mouth

“Umm Father”

Present

“ Oops sorry almost told you how I convinced you” Mortica giggled with his hand covering his mouth as tiny bits of drool escaped ‘Disgusting’ Wednesday thought rolling her eyes as she heard heels click from the hallway

“ Sorry I'm late you two, had to take care of some things” You came in as your fitted black dress trailed behind as blood was shown on your face.“ What are you two talking about” You tilted your head as your fox eyes squinted, looking at your husband and daughter

“ how you meet Father,” Wednesday says with a straight look, eyes staring into your soul

You gasped a small blush appeared on your face feeling embarrassed by the story and how you left the bodies of the bullies so out and open, your father would have been ashamed of you. But you smiled at your daughter

“ Oh Wednesday when you find your special someone” You go and sit next to your husband kissing him on his cheek and caressing his hand. You stare deeply into your daughter's eyes as your dilated and dark smile appears.

“ You would wipe out any obstacles in your way, so it can be you and them…forever okay?”

“Okay mother”

[prettypinkporkchop]

Can you please do a Paul x reader where she is trying to make Paul really jealous by flirting with embry or Jared

You set down the tiny shovel and place the seeds in the small hole. You covered it up before a voice calls out to you.

"Y/n! I need you!" It's Emily inside her house.

"Coming!" You yell back and stand up from the grass. You look at the flowers Emily got you to plant on the side of her house. You're satisfied with your work, hoping they live a long life.

You walk inside and see Jared and Embry sitting at the table laughing.

Emily is standing at the end of the table, looking disappointed in the boys.

"What's happening?" You chuckle awkwardly.

"These dumbasses made a bet. How Paul would react if you flirted with one of them." Emily sighs.

You face both of them with a raised eyebrow. "What the fuck? Why?" You laugh.

"Because it's funny." Embry says.

"I say, dude phases." Jared bets.

"No, no! Y/n controls his anger the best. I think he gets to swinging." Embry says. "20 bucks if I'm right."

"Whatever, Call." Jared says.

"Do I get a damn say?" You laugh and place your hand on your hip.

They both nod their heads. "Don't worry, you don't gotta do it. Mostly just a thought." He says to you. "I know if Kim were to flirt with your ugly ass, I'd rip your neck off." Jared points at Embry.

Embry rolls his eyes and then turns to you. "You down?" He asks.

"This isn't a good idea." Emily says.

You think for a moment. You've never seen Paul mad. It would kind of be funny. Maybe.

"Fine. Embry, you're the victim. I don't want to hurt Kim." You say.

And just on time, Sam and Paul step inside. You think fast and stand next to Embry, brushing through his hair. "Your hair is so soft." You gush.

Embry sits there awkwardly, not sure what to do. "Thanks. That feels nice." He sighs.

"Alright. Enough." Paul says, grabbing you and kissing you roughly. You kiss him back but pull away fast. Paul scoffs at the short kiss.

Emily whispers in Sam's ear, and he chuckles. That catches Paul's attention. "What?" He asks.

Sam shakes his head as a response.

You stand behind Embry and rest your hands on his bare shoulders. "Damn, you're so buff." You say.

Embry lifts his head and smiles up at you, winking.

"Oh, fuck no." Paul grabs your arm and pulls you into him. "Embry. Get. Your. Ass. Outside. Now." He growls.

You pull yourself out of his arm. Embry stands up and you stand next to him, leaning your head on his arm.

Paul begins to shake. He reaches for Embry and pulls him outside. "Hey! Hey! It's a prank! It's a joke! We're all in on it!" You hear Embry call out.

Everyone rushes out onto the porch. Sam is laughing, watching closely. Now, you're starting to feel bad.

Paul phases and growls at Embry. Embry phases and then cowers down to let him know he means no harm.

Jared laughs and claps his hands. "Embry's giving me 20 bucks."

Paul starts fighting Embry. Embry isn't causing any harm, just pushing him off of him. Then, Paul runs off into the woods. Embry faces you guys, huffs, and runs off, too.

After all of that, you and Paul are walking inside of your home. Before you can do anything, he roughly grabs your ass and then pushes your stomach against the wall. Your face is pressed up against it. He moves one hand up and wraps his fingers around your throat. He pulls your head back to whisper in your ear. "Don't you ever pull that shit again." He growls.

He forcefully turns you around so your back is against the wall. He lifts you up, and you wrap your legs around him. He kisses you roughly. He's biting. His tongue is forceful. Your hands reach his shoulders and you slightly dig your nails in his skin.

He throws his head back and then smirks. "Bed. Ass up. Don't speak." He warns.

YUH YUH! THANKS!

[heyclickadee]

Slightly unhinged Tech theories brought to you by:

1. How stupidly open Star Wars canon is.

2. An extremely stubborn form of optimism.

3. That red herrings only work if the real answer is more satisfying than the distraction, and the fact is that not only did we not get any answer AT ALL, but no one involved will actually straight up say it was a misdirect or what we were being misdirected from or even acknowledge there being any direction at all, meaning it was either the world’s most badly executed red herring, or it wasn’t a red herring at all/we just don’t have the actual answer yet.

4. The fact that Tech isn’t a real person, he’s an idea, meaning I don’t have to accept jack shit. Especially when canon has done so little to actually convince me he’s gone for good and it’s so markedly different than every other loss in the show.

[livenudebigfoot]

idk if willa takes connor seriously in the traditional sense, but i think she takes herself seriously, you know? more and more, i'm thinking that her disappearing from the rehearsal dinner was not just "am I really going to marry connor???" but also "i'm a real person so if i'm going to marry connor, i need to actually marry connor". like i think it matters to her that their relationship, transactional as it is, is an actual partnership. connor is a joke to everyone on the planet, but he's not a joke to willa because willa's committed to him and she's not a joke to herself.

anyway, there is something exhilarating and crazy-making about two people actually being On The Same Team on Succession, the show where everyone is betraying each other all the time.

[todayisafridaynight]

THIS IS GONNA SOUND SO MEAN BUT WHY DO U LIKE RYO AOKI/MASATO

masato hot