#it looks like they won't hire me xd

[umnitsa]

Dirty old man

Summary: Joel is on his seventies, but he still has needs.

A/N: Ok, so. One pic made the rounds in one of the discord servers I frequent and it made me wild, I won't lie (it was a pic/meme with aged Pedro Pascal). Highly inspired by @toxicanonymity's GILF!Joel (mine is a bit of a perv, but this isn't really a dark fic). It was also inspired by @atticrissfinch's MMITB (I wish I had a fraction of her talent for dirty talk, but I'm not even a native speaker of English, so I do what I can). Now you go read them both, I ASSURE YOU it'll be a good time. Huge thanks for all the people that cheered me on with this: Toxi, @romanarose, @beefrobeefcal, @gwendibleywrites, I love you all. (I must admit that I don't know if I'll ever continue this, honestly, although part of me wants to get to the sex scene. xD)

Pairing: No outbreak old man!Joel x Reader

CW: Joel being bold, dirty talk. That's it <3

No beta, we die like lonely writers xD

It wasn’t a bad job.

Sarah wanted to hire you to take care of her father, Joel. He wasn’t that old, but years of hard work in construction gave him some mobility issues. Sarah worried he spent too time alone, and that he could fall, get hurt and trapped without help because of his pride (which seemed to be a real possibility, considering Joel didn’t want to lose his independence in any way).

You were supposed to get the night shift, which was nice. The night shift was calm, except when it wasn’t. Sarah assured you she talked to her father, she wanted to introduce you to him, before you started working.

You prepared for war, if the man was as stubborn and grumpy as his daughter described.

Sarah introduced you and the old man looked at you over his glasses.

“You sure this pretty thing can lift me off the floor?” He asked, a crooked smirk stretching his lips. You considered answering him, but he raised his face defiantly and winked.

He was teasing his daughter.

You chuckled, to Joel’s delight. Sarah hired you on the spot.

***

Joel was grumpy most of the time. You could understand. Getting older was specially hard on some people. Losing their independence seemed to be a horrifying blow.

You admired the family pictures displayed on the walls and the bookshelves. They showed a younger Joel, large and proud, wearing tight tshirts that showed his big arms.

He didn’t change much, to be honest. His hair now was completely silver, as his beard. The wrinkles didn’t spoil his roguish smile. He was on his seventies, but looked younger, somehow. You blamed his brown eyes.

***

“You know what I miss most about my youth?” He said softly one day, entering the living room. You were looking at his pictures. He slowly moved by your side and placed a hand over your back, rubbing gentle circles. “All the pussy.”

You turned to him, astonished at his boldness. He smirked, then shrugged. You felt your face getting warm and a different, slick, syrupy warmth pooling on your lower belly. He licked his lips and sighed.

“It was easy to get pussy with those looks.” He pointed at one picture of himself and smiled proudly. “Didn’t fuck as much as I wanted, or as much as I could. Tried to be a good dad. Don’t regret anything, but... Oh boy, I miss it.” He looked you up and down, his smile turning appreciative.

“Thought old pervs like you liked tiny thin teenagers.” You scoffed.

“Only dumbasses want those.” Joel chuckled, his hand sliding lower on your back. “I like them older. Like you. With those eyes, like you know and did everything under the sun.” Joel hums, closing his eyes. “Get them cockdumb and they cry so sweetly… Mmmm, the surprise in their wide eyes...” He licks his lips, watching your reaction. You laugh, trying to hide your own arousal.

“Well, Joel, I think the preference is because they are supposed to be tight.” You said firmly, standing your ground. You refused to look shocked, and you saw no reason to scold him, at least not yet. Maybe it was your pussy talking.

Joel leaned over you slowly; you stayed very still. His warm breath tickled your ear.

“After a certain size, honey, everything feels tight.” He said softly, grabbing his half hard cock through his pants. You looked down and gasped, noticing the girth of his bulge inside his huge hand. Joel stepped back, smiling proudly, and moved into the house, dragging his feet. “Lemme know if you want a ride, sweetheart. Them blue pills are easy to get.” He turned and winked at you.

[impyssadobsessions]

DPXDC PROMPT Vlad Hired the Wrong Guy

Vlad decides that perhaps a ghost can't do the job right anymore -though as much as Vlad would have loved that to be the fitting end for Jack- so he hires an assassin instead to finally put the end to this.

He hires the best. Deathstroke.

Slade however decided to take a liking to the little hero. So when Slade succeeds in his mission (or not if you want to pull some plot shenanigans) he ends up taking away something far more valuable to Vlad.

Danny. Now Imma put my thoughts below but y'all can take this anyway you want >w< <3

I can see Vlad giving Deathstroke weapons to fight/capture Danny too- not kill him though he probably can't even imagine that would be possible- with order to strictly kill Jack and maybe make it look like Phantom did it. (For some extra spice ;3) Phantom was able to fool some of Slade's attempts- but in an all out brawl- Slade wipes the floor with Danny. Danny being slung around like a rag doll, taunted, and mocked. He doesn't stop fighting which just amuses Slade more. Eventually there first fight gets interrupted (cause I imagine it was in the lab) probably be Jack and Maddie coming into the basement- but Deathstroke was able to hit Danny with the belt- forcing him to change before vanishing himself. So Danny gets "grounded" from the lab- even though he tried to play it off as a ghost attack- which made it either worse or better for him. His parents going protective mode- when he's trying to figure out how to save them. Only for Deathstroke to be in his room one day, looking for a "chat". Danny's not having it and tries to fight him only to be captured by one of Vlad's devices. Danny recognizing it. "You-You're working for Vlad!" "Oh ho ho, So you do have some brain cells that isn't used just for puns?" "Why!?" "Money. And a few unique toys." Slade tossing an ecto-ray in his hands. "I'm an assassin. I had assume you didn't need to be detective to figure that one out." Danny struggling against his bindings. Panicking. "You can't- Vlad-..." "Oh I definitely can. He is not the hardest target I had to hit- though I must admit you're an annoying obstacle." "I won't let you!" "I don't think you're in a position to stop me." Slade pressing a button to shock Danny before he a new power to escape. The shock forcing him to revert to his Human form. Imagine Deathstroke taunts Danny more. About what he is- about his parents hatred of ghosts. "Even if you save them- they would hate you. Shame." "You're not the first fruitloop to tell me that." Can see after Danny impresses him one more time- and Slade finds out Vlad is also a half ghost. I can imagine Slade finds a way to force Danny to join him. Whether its by succeeding in killing his dad and manipulating Danny into learning out to take revenge- Or by blackmailing/threatening to follow through but not just kill Jack/ but both his parents- saying he'll teach him how to REALLY fight. Even saying that with his help, he'll make sure Masters won't bother him again. Just all the manipulating. Danny at wits end might take it. Can see Vlad being FURIOUS- but now Deathstroke has weapons to not only HARM/KILL him-he ALSO becomes Danny's mentor. Vlad being the one to contact heroes he knows have history with Deathstroke... framing it as him taking away his godson. Maybe purposely sought out Nightwing. Unknowingly damning himself more as Nightwing will find out Vlad was the cause to all this- AND if Danny gets rescued/gets out of his deal- he'll have hero friends to rely on.

I just love the idea of Slade and Danny dynamic. Especially since Danny not only similar to Dick, his phantom form also looks similar to Respawn. I just think its neat XD And be a damn terrifying threat to Danny.

[hinumay]

i made Fjord again weee, tis but a sketch.. for now xD

like... this was suppose to be a sailor's clothes from the Menagerie Coast, specifically Port Damali... but it looks like he's sort of a rich guy.. still need to develop but i enjoyed this a lot T_T

One thing I hate about having brain rot on a specific topic such as The Clothing of The Menagerie Coast... Is that ..... IVE NARROWED IT DOWN FOR NOW ... In Port Damali...mm but I want to go more in detail on the other cities and what the Ki'nau's clothing trends might be T-T.... I'm afraid I won't ever get off of this topic aaaaaaahhh and I'm still not finished with Whitestone even waaaahh

also I have KOFI!! if you guys want to support me doing art!

Also guys commissions open! hire meeee xD

[yuna542]

Connected (OT8 x reader)

Part 7<-

Part 8

Pairing: Chan x reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Angst

Warnings: 18+, Smut, under 18 DNI!, Suggestive Themes, Swearing, unprotected sex (just don‘t), daddy kink, praising, pet names

Word Count: 3.8k

(Had to reupload this part, cause Tumblr wouldn’t let me edit it)

Note: Here you go, you thirsty little creatures! God I love my readers xD hope you like my twisted little fantasies. I love reading all your comments and requests. Also suddenly I‘m married to several people because of this story. So thank you… I guess ~much love!

On your first day of your new job as the personal manager of Stray Kids, you didn't expect to be standing in front of the man you made out with last night in a club. But it soon becomes clear that the Stray Kids don't just want you as their manager.

Will this passionate arrangement end your career?

"Did you see that, hyung? That asshole just wanted to get into her pants!", Seungmin snapped as Mr. Jang left the room.

You were still packing up your things and waiting for someone to pick you up to be taken outside. As soon as you had been alone, Seungmin had jumped up and his suppressed anger had just poured out of his eyes.

"It's okay, guys. He will fund your project and that's the most important thing", you dismissed it and shoved your Ipad into your bag. You were just tired and disgusted. But you had reached your goal and that's what you were here for.

Briefly, you looked at the card in your hand, which had the rich man's number on it. But before you could put it into your bag, Chan snatched it out of your hand.

"No way! We'll get the money anyway. You won't sell yourself for it!", he said, and now the friendly mask fell. You only now noticed how angry he really was.

His hand was clenched into a fist and his jawline twitched tensely as he had to restrain himself from smashing any of the ugly decorations in the room into a thousand pieces. Chan was incredibly intimidating when he was angry, you just realised.

"Maybe he really just wants to drink coffee and talk about business", you tried to calm him down, but Chan shook his head and his eyes shot lightning bolts. That protective side to them both made your heart flutter.

"Didn't you see him staring at your tits the whole time? He wants you naked in his bed, nothing else", Chan spat out and you couldn't help but stare at him. His muscles tensed dangerously under his shirt as he tore up the card and threw it emphatically into the trash can right next to the desk. He was incredibly sexy when he was angry, and that realisation was a bit strange.

Seungmin also ran a tense hand through his hair and growled: "That fucker... I would have loved to punch that asshole in the face when he stared at you so greedily."

"Let's just get out of here", you said, now that you were getting heated by their protective presence. The way the guys cared about you was way too attractive and you automatically imagined Seungmin choking your neck with his bare hands instead of the back of the chair and immediately your knees went weak.

On the way back, Seungmin's hand was on your thigh again, only this time not gently and lovingly. His grip was harsh and he grabbed your inner thigh so tightly throughout the ride that it made you dizzy.

Only when you got out of the Uber you could breathe a sigh of relief. His fingers had left red marks on your leg. as well as a burning sensation in your lower abdomen.

Just as you walked through the entrance of the JYP building, you got a call from one of the company's executives.

Nervously, you answered the phone and indicated to the guys with a wave to go ahead without you.

"Good afternoon, Ms. Y/L/N. We already heard that the conversation with Mr. Jang went very well."

The older woman's voice was unfamiliar to you, but you knew exactly who she was. Mrs. Chung was a very big deal at JYP and mainly handled the hiring and matters of the staff, as well as all social media matters.

„Yes. He even plans to fund more projects as well", you said, stopping in front of the elevator so you could speak in peace.

"That sounds like a big success. Very good! But I'm actually calling about something else. Could you come to my office on floor three?"

Your heart slipped into your pants and you nodded until you remembered that she couldn't see you.

„I'm already in the building. I'm on my way", you said and by then she had hung up.

You went up to the third floor, your heart pounding, unable to imagine what she wanted to discuss with you.

In front of the office you took a deep breath and knocked. Immediately you were called in and the woman, who reminded you strongly of a librarian with her kind eyes and pinned up hair, smiled delightedly.

So it couldn't be anything too bad, could it?

After a brief greeting, she offered you to sit down. She closed the laptop that was in front of her and folded her arms on the table. Then she pushed her black glasses on her head and said:

"Have you settled in well with us yet?"

"Yes. I really like it a lot."

"That's nice. I hear you're a great asset to Stray Kids. There haven't been any problems since you've been here."

„I try my best!", you assured her, almost bursting with curiosity by now.

"Were there many problems before?", you asked curiously and she chuckled slightly.

You know the boys by now. So far no one has been able to tame them...“

She sighed like an overworked mother and shook her head.

"I saw that you're a talented dancer and have done a stream about that with Hyunjin“, she began then and you restlessly kneaded your hands in your lap.

"I'm very sorry if I wasn't allowed to do that... We thought the fans would like it."

Quickly, Mrs. Chung waved a hand in the air as if to scare away the misunderstanding like an insect.

"Oh it did! We had four times the number of viewers and got many new followers in addition just because of the stream. Also the little private moments in the videos and vlogs that go viral between you and the guys inspires speculation. That polarizes and brings attention. It's beneficial for JYP and Stray Kids as long as it doesn't get too much."

The last sentence was accompanied by a warning look and you pressed your lips together.

"Understood."

Of course, they were going to use the attention you brought them. Obviously, it was your luck that the fans reacted so positively to you and shipped you with the guys rather than hating you.

"But that's not the point at all. Bang Chan approached us with a request and we decided to give you a platform."

"What?"

Completely irritated, you clawed at the tabletop.

"You are allowed to upload streams or dance covers as part of JYP and Stray Kids, if you want to. It's really important to us to promote talent."

She pulled out a sheet of paper and placed it in front of you with a pen. It had your name written on it, and it was actually an employment contract. You could hardly believe your luck. This had always been your dream.

What had Chan done now? How did he know that you always wanted to share your talent with the world? This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

"If you sign the contract, we'll cover all the costs for future projects."

"Projects?"

You were starting to feel stupid for all the questions, but it was too surreal to believe.

"The fans want to see more of you. So we're giving it to them. JYP gets 30 percent of the revenue, and in exchange you get to publish through the official channel, as well as your own JYP Instagram account that we give you. What you do with that is up to you. However, it must not affect your work as the manager of Stray Kids.“

Now you were speechless.

"Are we agreed?", she asked with an amused smile.

"Yes, thank you very much. I don't even know what to say", you said, unable to suppress the wide smile.

"Don't thank us. Bang Chan brought it up to us and pointed out what an advantage you would be to JYP entertainment if you were allowed to show your face. And of course your skills."

This man always managed to surprise you. Without further ado, you signed the contract and clarified a few more questions. You would receive access to your account in the next few days and if you wanted to release a dance cover, you simply had to send the video to Mrs. Chung and she would publish it on the official JYP Entertainment YouTube channel.

Completely flabbergasted, you walked out of the room and without another thought, your legs carried you to Chans studio. Your heart almost burst with joy and you pushed the door open without knocking.

You couldn't wait, you had to see him and thank him. Actually, you had no idea what you were about to do. Your mind went blank and you just wanted to see his face.

Alarmed, he jumped up from his chair. He was working on a beat again and looked at you in amazement when you just came rushing into the room.

"Y/N? Are you all right?", he asked, unable to get another word out as you had already thrown yourself at him. He stumbled back a few steps as he caught you, but then held you tightly as you pressed your lips wildly to his.

The kiss was messy and you pulled his body closer to yours. Immediately his hands were on your hips and even though you completely surprised him, he kissed you back with the same intensity.

Your hands wandered into his hair, running through his curls and tugging lightly on them. His cinnamon-y smell mixed with his spicy cologne completely filled your perception and you immediately wanted more.

When you broke away from him, he looked at you like a deer in headlights.

"What was that for?", he asked with a puzzled look on his face, not letting go of you.

You clasped your hands in his neck and he warmed as you looked at him through your thick lashes with those sparkling eyes.

"I just went to Mrs Chung.... Why are you always so damn nice to me?", you asked desperately, pressing your body against his.

You could feel his strong torso against your chest and wanted to explore each of his muscles with your fingers.

He enjoyed your body heat and casually let his fingers brush over the thin fabric of your dress.

"Because you deserve it."

"Channie this has always been my dream. To dance and show it to the world.... How did you know?"

An embarrassed laugh escaped him, and his dimples charmed you all over again.

"Hyunjin told me how good you are at dancing, Felix and Jeongin came up with the idea. I just made it happen."

You realized once again how lucky you were to have gotten this job. To meet the boys who made your life so much better.

He dreamily examined your body and enjoyed how you trembled under his touch.

All day long he had wanted to tear your dress off and when the rich asshole had stared at you so lustfully, he would have loved to fuck you on his desk in front of his eyes so that the guy would understand who owned you and what he would never get.

These extreme thoughts had surprised him himself, but when you were around, he just couldn't help himself.

"I want to show you how grateful I am", you suddenly said then, pulling him closer by his belt.

Chan watched your expression as you seductively bit your lower lip and undid his belt buckle. It was too much for him.

Your dress hugged your breasts perfectly and your pretty face, with intense eyes gave him the rest. Before he could stop you, you pressed your lips on his again, sliding your tongue into his mouth and he jumped at it like a needy puppy.

Your fingers undid the buttons of his shirt so quickly that he exhaled loudly as your cool fingers suddenly stroked his bare abs.

He hadn't expected you to be so boisterous and dominant, and it only fueled his lust for you even more.

While you slowly slide to your knees, you spread kisses all over his firm abs and his skin tasted addicting. It tasted deliciously sweet and savory at the same time.

Immediately he threw his head back and enjoyed every touch of your full lips on his skin. When he managed to look at you again, something exploded in his head.

You on your knees, in that tight dress, looking at him through your thick lashes with that greedy look on your pretty face, made his length in his pants become painfully hard and by now he couldn't stand the friction against the fabric of his pants.

"Really? Here? With me?", escaped him and you smiled such a beautiful smile that he had to control himself not to bend you over his table immediately.

"As the leader, you have the right to claim me first."

'I'm the first of us?", he asked with a calm rasp, in his voice. You nodded and stuck your fingers in his waistband.

"The first to fuck me. I want you to be."

"God…“

That sentence with your soft voice was enough to make his impatience win.

"Shit, babe I can't wait", he hissed as you pulled down his pants.

He grabbed you by the sides to drag you back up to him. Even though he would have loved to feel your lips around his hard cock, by now he was sure he wouldn't last that long.

He lifted you onto the edge of the table with ease. He pushed your legs apart and pulled you closer again by your face before kissing you.

The kiss was more sensual and deeper than anything you had experienced before and you melted in his firm grip.

He slid your dress over your hips and then took it off completely. Briefly, he took a few seconds to just look at you.

"Fuck... You're so fucking beautiful."

His voice deepened with each word and the excitement in his eyes gave you goosebumps.

Immediately he kissed your neck, sucked on it and cupped your breasts with his big hands until you whimpered with desire.

He looked up at you and put a hand on the clasp of your bra.

"May I?"

You nodded, your head already spinning and he was still the respectful gentleman. With a tight smile from him, your bra landed somewhere in the room and he took one of your nipples into his mouth.

He kneaded your other breast until you couldn't take it anymore and rubbed your soaked core against the bulge in his boxers.

He let his fingers brush over the wet spot in your panties and expelled his hot breath against your skin.

"You're going to keep that pretty mouth shut. Understood? Otherwise we will be caught."

He pulled back, looking at you nod furiously.

You were still at the company and if you would get caught, you would probably loose your job and Chan would be in big trouble.

Unfortunately that risk made it even more exiting.

He turned you around, pushed carelessly his holy laptop and the recording equipment away and bent you over his desk in one swift motion. Slowly he circled your clothed clit with his thumb, what made you whimper underneath him.

"Fuck you're so soaked...“

He grabbed the flesh of your asscheek with one hand and pushed his thumb even harder onto your clit.

Immediately you moaned and arched your back.

"What did I say?", he questioned, covering your mouth with one hand and bluntly pulled your panties to the side pumping his finger into you making you gasp against his hand. Electric shocks pierced your body with each reentry of his finger.

"Already this loud with just a finger? How am I going to fuck you?", he groaned into your ear.

His raspy voice sent chills down your spine, you've never seen this side of him before. So dark and dominant. It made you even more aroused.

"Channie, please...", you whimpered with your fingernails digging into his desk.

"Do you want me to fuck you, babygirl? Say it!"

His demanding tone made you squirm and you pushed your throbbing core at him.

"Yes, please. Fuck me, Channie!"

"Good girl", he smiled, as he ripped down your panties to the ground.

He lined himself up behind you to enter you. Teasingly he slid his tip along your folds and you rubbed yourself against him. With one hand he pushed you down to the table and the other hand grabbed your hips, as he moaned, pushing himself in:

"Fuck you're tight."

You gasped, as he stretched you out and clenched your teeth, as he didn't slow down while pushing his length into you.

Because at this point there is no doubt about it. Chan doesn't just have Big Dick Energy. Oh he is big.

So big that you almost fainted. And he knew exactly how you would feel it all.

After he managed to bury himself entirely into your pussy, he began to shove himself into you. After a few thrusts, that made you feel like he would rip you apart, the sensation was feeling more pleasure than pain, although he slid every time deeper inside you.

He soon speeded up his pace, hitting all your sweet spots making you pornographically moan.

The room was filled with the sounds of your whimpers, his growls, and the slapping of skin, as he pushed your hip with each thrust rougher against him and fucked you hard against his desk.

You could see your reflection in the dark screen of his computer and almost blushed because of the fucked out expression on your face.

He carried on fucking you senseless from behind and didn't stop a second. You moaned his name several times, which made him slam even harder into your wet core.

You whined, as your body began to tense around him.

"Are you going to cum?", he asked grabbing your arms and pushing them behind you to hold your wrists with just one hand fiercely pressed against your back.

"Not yet!", he ordered, as he managed to fuck even deeper inside you. Without your hands you were completely at his mercy and your eyes rolled to the back of your head, as you tried to stop yourself from coming.

"Channie, please... I can't... You're so big...“

Slowly tears were welling up in your eyes and oh he loved your desperate begging.

"Please. Daddy."

The words escaped you with a sob unaware and released by Chans dominant behaviour.

"Holy fuck...", he let out and you obviously found a secret trigger that made him go feral. Grabbing your hands tighter he slammed into you and pushed you up the table. He watched your boobs bounce with every move.

"You want to cum for daddy, babygirl?", he growled at you.

"Yes", you cried.

"Daddy, please! Let me come!"

Just as you thought, that was enough to push him over the edge.

"Fuck, I'm gonna cum."

His thrusts became sloppier, dick twitching inside you.

"Come with me, baby!", he let out before he spilled himself inside you. And you did. Your orgasm washed over you like a tsunami and left you with trembling legs and faltering breath.

As you both came down from your high, he pulled himself out of you and turned you around, to lift you on the table again. He grabbed a tissue box and cleaned you and himself up.

"Are you okay?", he asked and the sweet and charming Chan was back. You had now idea what just happened.

Exhausted you could only nod and Chan smiled softly as he gave you a sweet kiss on the lips and gently wiped the tears from your cheeks with his thumb.

"Your fucked out face is so pretty", he teased and pulled you into his arms until he was sitting in his chair again, you on his lap, stroking your back affectionately.

You locked at him with a wondering smile.

"Never thought you would be so dirty... Daddy", you teased him.

"Hah", he chuckled and wrapped his big arms tighter around your body.

"Just a little."

Oh after what you just experienced, he wasn't just a little dirty. That boy had a kink that you wouldn't have expected. And of course he fucked you better than anyone before.

Later that day, after you've gotten dressed again and slipped into your office like nothing ever happened, Chan joined the others in the dance studio to practice the choreography.

He was the last one and started to sit down on the floor next to Lee Know to follow his example and stretch.

Jeongin and Hyunjin were already standing in front of the mirror going through the first steps, while Han, Seungmin and Changbin sat on the couch, talking quietly and waiting until they could finally start.

Felix came over to Chan and offered to help him and so they stretched together, Felix pushing Chan's legs apart with his.

"Why are you so late? We wanted to start an hour ago", Hyunjin asked and Chan tried to avoid eye contact and focus on the pain in his legs so as not to give himself away immediately.

The conversation between Han and Seungmin fell silent and Chan only said:

"I had something else to do.“

Then Han and Changbin suddenly giggled and poked each other as if they were sharing a naughty secret.

"Oh you definitely had something to do!", said Han with a grin. The others all looked at him now.

"It definitely sounded from outside the door like that too!", added Changbin and both giggled again.

That's when Chan slowly realized it. He remembered the message from Han on his phone, where he had written to him that he would not come to the studio beforehand.

The message came while he was busy fucking you from behind, so he didn't think much of it.

As Chan still stared in confusion, Changbin began to moan in a high-pitched voice:

"Daddy, please! Oh, fuck me daddy!"

Han immediately joined in by slapping his hand on his thigh to imitate the sound and also repeating the naughty words Chan had heard from you only minutes before.

"Chan fucked Y/N in the studio?", shouted Hyunjin and by now Han and Changbin were holding their stomachs laughing as Chan buried his face in his hands and shook his head.

The others also smirked and couldn't help but tease their leader as well.

As Han slowly regained his breath, he explained:

„We went to pick up Chan, and just as we were standing right outside the door, that's when we heard how hard he was really working.“

The sarcasm was unmistakable and Felix now had to hold a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing out loud.

Even Jeongin couldn't help but annoy Chan:

„The walls are probably not as soundproof as we thought.“

"I didn't know you were into that kind of stuff, Hyung", Seungmin chuckled and Lee Know joined in with an evil grin:

"Or should we call you daddy now too? Would you like that, hyung?"

By now his face was burning and he just wanted to run away.

"Can we just start practicing? Please?", Chan asked sheepishly, and they did.

However, not without teasing him about it all evening.

->Part 9

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© Yuna542 — 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

Taglist (closed):

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[rontra]

I have never played persona so I wasn't sure if I would understand your failteacher comics but I just looked up the characters for a little bit of context and I'm 👀👀👀👀 at it now xD

Without being too spoiler-y, why would you say they'd have a messy relationship? (Besides the fact of Becky taking advantage of her client's loneliness)

HAHAHA yea i think the like dramatic irony enjoyment of knowing (even just roughly) what's going on with becky is very strong so good on you there (obviously toriumi has no idea what's going on with her and becky is doing her best to Handle It, but it contextualizes her behavior for Us...<3)

it's yummy isnt it... its yummy

anyway, the rest of this very long post is just me analyzing a fictional situation i myself engineered, so if that sounds boring please dont click the Read More LMFAO <- cursed to put a lot of thought into Character Stuff

basically they have great potential for mess, which they're Currently keeping a lid on, but would exponentially increase with time. teehee.

as for what WILL happen, im not spoiling anything concrete of course… (winks at the Knowers who already know my Vision….

well, this AU isn't ever going to devolve into a "super destructive toxic nightmare" mess or anything, just to get our working definitions of 'mess' sorted out at the top of the post. not this time. atm (as of comic #3) it's shaping up more like a "this seems . inadvisable and absolutely Don't Try This At Home, but i guess it won't…kill you" mess (LMAO)

to assess their situation at present… there is one half who wants money (and can't ever make enough of it to satisfy her extortionists), and one half who wants intimacy (and is scared and unable to get it on her own). on its exterior face, it's simply a lonely person hiring a professional to keep them company, which is a fairly common thing n not rly super noteworthy; the parentheticals are what make things a bit uh thorny for these characters

the "problem" here is not the transaction itself; they're both willing to supply their half of the trade just fine, and neither party is doing anything wrong by engaging in it. but for these two specifically, there is also a mutual willingness to bend the rules of their transaction—because they're both cornered in some way, and desperate for what the other one is offering to trade

to elaborate on "rules", i mean, first and foremost, that their relationship is not "real"—these people Don't know each other personally and intimately, and they're Not Supposed To. their relationship should never be "real"; they're not friends! (or lovers, for that matter!) they're in a conditional exchange of money for services. right now, these characters are participating in and maintaining a kayfabe; they should operate under a tacit understanding that A) this is not real, B) they both fully know it's not real, and C) following the script is the comfortable way to get what they both want without causing undue risk to either party. creating and then maintaining a fake "reality" together is regulated by a contract between them, and it ends when their booked time ends (and not a minute over time!)

but to return to the earlier point, they're also both cornered and desperate, which drives them both to go beyond what might be considered appropriate. i think this is compelling; it's probably unnecessary of me to add this paragraph but i want to underline (just in case) that i don't think either of them is like "at fault" or w/e (there is no "villain" between them). they're showing Signs Of Mess that could snowball into something much more messy, but it's not something they're doing to hurt each other; they're making decisions based on skewed risk/reward estimations that might not be healthy, and could realistically have harmful consequences for both parties, but they're not, like, Evil (lol). two women getting wrapped up in each other's personal graveyard spirals…it's yuri, isn't it?

with that squared away, and putting it plainly;

toriumi should not be asking her to "break character" when the character itself is what she's paying for; this nudging of their little kayfabe, if indulged, could easily snowball and erode the professional boundaries between them (what she calls "distance" in #3). she is paying 'becky' to 'be here' (paying kawakami to conjure 'becky' into existence by pretending to be her), but she isn't really being mindful of the type of role that this necessarily demands of her in turn. the built-in emotional walls between them are there to protect both of them, but she doesn't fully respect them (despite instinctively sensing their protection in how "safe" becky feels to her). in the end, toriumi is bad at "staying in character" herself, and she can't help but try to root out the actual person behind the mask—despite the fact that no one wants this erosion to happen! possible dire consequences for her wallet aside, losing sight of the line between "transaction" and "investment" (pardon the pun) is a one-way ticket to a very messy place where one or both of them is likely to get hurt...

on the other end, and not helping the situation at all, kawakami identified toriumi as a soft target pretty much immediately, and is actively trying to elicit sympathy and endear herself to her (she is being quite choosy about what vulnerabilities she "lets slip" in #2) in order to make her keep booking and paying. of course some amount of "salesmanship" is part of the job—#grindset always be plugging smash that like button comment n subscribe—but the major difference here is that she's overtly attempting to foster in her client the exact kind of dependency/personal attachment she should be discouraging (for, frankly, both of their safety). like not only is she out fishing to get toriumi hook line and sinker on purpose, but it's also alarmingly reckless behavior on kawakami's part; there's a lack of regard for her own wellbeing involved here on top of it all. again, a messy place where someone, maybe everyone, gets hurt in the end

crucially though, as comic #3 finishes setting up, they're both willing to endure these shenanigans from the other half. at this stage, toriumi does realize that kawakami has her unilaterally wrapped around her finger, and nonetheless agrees that she'll call her again; while kawakami knows very well how this kayfabe is supposed to work, but is indulgent (even rewarding) towards toriumi for her clumsiness. that mutual willingness to keep playing this game would—if the AU continued on these tracks uninterrupted—probably compound until the situation they've made becomes super confusing and unclear for them emotionally...

of course "taking advantage" is sort of a loaded phrase colloquially… but i would say in many ways they are "taking advantage" of each other, yea. the "we both benefit, so it's okay" logic was already vaguely raised as justification in #3; if elaborated a bit with the above in mind, their situation is one where "even if they're both overstepping what is considered appropriate for their arrangement, they've also both decided the benefits outweigh the costs by a wide enough margin to make it worthwhile"

it's got the marks of a sort of symbiotic relationship... their individual motivations for being involved w each other are totally unrelated (cue the "hold on, does. kawakami even like women???" question), but they both feel they benefit enough towards their priority goals to be OK with the other one taking something "less valuable" from them (toriumi even calls out the “sales pitch” becky is doing in #2, but ultimately decides that’s fine because she’s willing to buy). i think each and every moving part here has great capacity to go "too far" and ruin things (perhaps even causing Severe damage in the collapse), but if the situation were to continue in this same rhythm, without that kind of dramatic change, i would say "they're both evaluating the scenario with their own personal goals in mind, and are extracting what they want from one another relatively(?) peacefully(??)". like it might ultimately be a selfish game but they're adults they'll figure it out probably idk its none of my business what they choose to get up to. wouldn't get into that type of shit myself though LOL

women are playing kind of dangerous games with each other but i forgive them because it's interesting to rotate in my mind...<3

another thorn to consider for their future bonding endeavors from here on ofc is that without being "cornered" the way they are, they would not be running this type of "risk math" in the first place. it's hard for either of them to fully back away at this point because they're already cornered in their personal lives; toriumi is incredibly isolated and lonely with a pretty insecure lifestyle even when she's NOT actively sawing through the branch she's sitting on, and kawakami famously MORE THAN ANYTHING ELSE, NEEDS A LOT OF MONEY RIGHT NOW because she's being extorted by an unrelated third party. looking ahead it does kind of start to look like an ouroboros of "taking advantage of each other" bc it's hard for both of them to leave their individual situations; it's kind of like, if they weren't here with each other they'd be ... well, they'd be here—just with someone else...

they didn't put each other in this jam—it was unrelated personal circumstances and sheer coincidence that pushed them together—but now that they've committed to each other, it's hard to reverse back out, if that makes sense. i think that kind of thing is interesting too, because it makes me want to see them recognize this, connect, and help each other pull out of their Greater individual personal messes. you know? we can make it if we try... just the two of us... 😔

(unfortunately step 1 of that is ofc to make a genuine personal bond that isn't wrapped up in all this for-pay roleplay stuff. drat!)

tl;dr they're both simmering under high pressure and don't try this at home, but they do already have a sort of tacit agreement forming that this level of messy play is OK between them—as long as the rewards continue to outweigh the risks. at the end of the day, it's a delicate balance ultimately hinging on a money-for-services transaction, so if either of them stopped feeling like paying their half was worth it, it would rapidly come apart. i guess it's kinda like the ways you can tell if animals are genuinely beefing or just playing rough—are they willingly coming back? 💀 ...

no lmao where's that post thats like "this would be terrible if it was anyone else, but considering the people involved this is actually the best option" HRBHJDJG that's kind of how it feels. like if they're gonna be stuck with Somebody (and they would be), its probably good luck that they got Each Other. at least the narrative can sustain the balance of this one and maybe even solve it down the line. heart

to round this post off i would say if i had to nominate one of them, kawakami is probably the most "in control" atm—since she figured out very quickly that she was dealing with an easy mark and moved in to make her a regular customer (quite successfully i might add per the end of #3 lmaoo). i think that's been kinda fun, since in her SLink she's immediately on the back foot due to being unmasked by the inciting incident. we know she will lie and attempt to play to the listener's sympathy, so unleashing her with her Mask Still On has been fun 😭 for her part, toriumi is not only taken with the funny maid (& emotionally invested in her IRL situation to boot), but also very clumsily trying to obtain something she's scared to have, which makes her very impulsive/erratic in her rulebreaking compared to kawakami's much more intentional plays...

play of the game ��� (<- there's no maid emoji idk its housekeeping)

of course, my future plans will immediately jostle this entire dynamic into something else and make this whole post obsolete, but i don't wanna lay that out ahead of time. smiles.

anyway, otome dissection on the playlist or whatever

[onskepa]

Tsyeytsyip

HELLOOOOOOOO EVERYONE! I have received two requests that were nearly identical so once again I have decided to combine them into one!

@rebellizards : It's me again! I requested neteyam x tiny!human!reader where she is smol and cute and he's big and tall. How I said, for her, Neteyam it's the size of Gulliver from Gulliver's Travels compared to the Liliputians. And she is half of his little finger (idk if i should call it pinky). I rly don't know what to choose, maybe he traps her in his hand or put her on his nose while he is lying down on the grass just for fun. Like, it'll be sooooo cute to see them, the mighty warrior playing with the little human girl. Of course she enjoys it too but she won't admit it

Kisses kisses

BIRTHDAY ANON: IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!

As my birthday present I wanna request you because, with all honesty in the world, you are my favourite writer and I love your work so much there are not enough words in this world so I can describe my love and appreciation for your work!

With other words:

I. Love. You.

Soooo I want a neteyam x human female reader who it's smoll. Like, I always liked the huge size difference between a giant and a human. I have a sick weakness about giants. One time I watched Gulliver's Travels and I. Got. Wet. Hell knows how but ehh.... Back to my request!

Neteyam x human female reader where reader is super smol, maybe half of his index finger and he traps her in his hand or let's her sleep under his chin or teases her. Like threathing to lay on top of her jut to see her adorable face filling with fear hehe.

Super Duper Cute

p.s.: i read "Hi'i" (idk if i wrote it well) and I love it sooooo much. It's perfect!

Thank you both for requesting, AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANON! I didn't want this one to be delayed even a day! So hope you all sit back, relax and enjoy this gift!

P.S: I have taken some inspiration from the movie "secret world of Arriety" such a good movie! XD

Little pouch

------------------------------------------------------------------------

[for reference, reader is 5 inches tall, not tiny for us humans but tiny for na'vi]

If one were to look at neteyam sully, as he talks to himself, people would think he is out of it. Or he could be talking through an earpiece but no. If you look carefully, there is something small sitting or standing on neteyam's shoulder or laying on top of his head.

What is the tiny thing?

Why that would be none other than Tsyeytsyip, or Tey for short. Tey is a small tiny human, smaller than a new born, smaller than anything tiny in the world of pandora. How she became like this is unknown, since she was born from a long line of small humans back on Earth, and the RDA hired her parents to work with them in working the smaller stuff.

But that was a long time ago. Now tey lives her best life in the massive giant world of pandora and the creature that inhabit the planet. Well as best as she can. Literally anything can kill her. Tey has a higher chance of being crushed by something than an average size human.

Which is why neteyam, even though no one asked him, has decided he would protect little bite. Every since they met, neteyam has been nothing but a tease to little bite.

You see, despite being so tiny, Tey has a bite, and she isn't afraid who to bite. Many will flinch from the sharp pain and leave her alone. But neteyam? he just laughs.

That is the thing with neteyam. He adores his good friend little bite, she is sweet, kind, yet oh so tiny. Neteyam cant help but tease his cute little friend. Yes, she will try to bite his finger off but he cant help it! She is too cute! So whenever they are together, neteyam wont let the day end without some cute reaction from little bite.

"neteyam for the last time GET YOUR STINKY ASS FOOT AWAY FROM ME!" little bite screamed at the top of her lungs. Angry and cant be taken seriously. little bite was glaring up at neteyam, who was having a fit of laughter.

"hahaha! I'm sorry tey, I cant help it" neteyam grins happily. Playfully, he would pretend to almost step on little bite and would feel a small poke or prick on her "little weapon". A toothpick.

"cant help my tiny ass! you do this to me all the time!! Using your big blue giant FEET to scare me! and if is not you trying to step on me, it would be your sharp teeth or your massive hands!" little bite huffs out. Neteyam grins as he picks up little bite onto his hand.

"You know I am only playing with you little bite, its just my way of teasing you. I would never hurt you, you're my cute little human" neteyam says while smiling innocently.

Being careful, he strokes little bite's cute face with adoration. Little bite blushed seeing how genuine neteyam is being. Placing her small hands on his finger, feeling his cool body temperature. Leaning her head on his finger, enjoying neteyam's 'embrace'.

"Well...try to tone it down. Every time you scare me, I feel as though my heart will explode" little bites says. She should be used to neteyam's tactics by now, but its hard when it looks like every movement will end her.

"I wont have that, your tiny heart is meant to beat for me" the giant blue boy smirks handsomely. Revealing his sharp fangs with the sunlight reflecting. Slightly pouting, little bite says "no, my heart beats for me to be alive". Neteyam chuckles, his vibrations sends little bite's mind wild. Why must neteyam be so good looking?

"if you are done laughing, I am starving! lets get a snack or something to eat" little bite says while rubbing her hands. "you are always hungry" neteyam comments. Placing her hands on her hips she looks up at him, "I am tiny, so my energy quickly goes down". Rolling his eyes, neteyam places little bite on his shoulder as he searches for some berries.

"during the mean time, we should also make new clothing for you" neteyam says. Little bite looks down at her outfits and it is starting to show wear and tear. Materials made for her outfits are not always the best materials to make clothes out of. Using grass, dried leaves, or scales of an animal.

"Bit tricky to find lasting items to make clothes out of" little bite replies. Finding a berry vine, neteyam gives little bite a single berry which looks like a large ball in her hands. "YES!" she shouts happily and munches away the juicy berry.

Neteyam sits down and collects some grass to make something while little bite eats. A comfortable silence was there between them.

It was like that for a while, when little bite was full she rubbed her belly in satisfaction. "phew! those were good berries" she says happily. "I can tell, your face is covered in berry juice" neteyam chuckles. Little bite touched her face, feeling the stickiness of the berry juice. "Can you take me to the pond near by?" she asks. Neteyam nods and carries her in his hand, being careful as usual. Reaching there, he gently puts her down. "Going to take a quick wash!" little bite says and goes to the stones that makes a tiny cave.

Neteyam nods and looks at the little waterfall. It is his favorite place. It is where his father taught him how to fish, relax, play around, and where he met his tiny friend. A special place he holds dear to his heart.

"When you are done, wear this" he places a tiny item near the little cave for little bite to take. He didn't had to wait long, Little bite came out from the rocks and fresh and clean and wearing the new outfit he made for her.

"Huh, this is very nice comfortable" little bite admires her new outfits. It was made with the petals of her favorite flower, the woven ends design as a flowy dress with its colors complementing her skin. Tied neatly with the flower vine and The texture of the petals are so soft and light, its easy for little bite to move around. Truly the best outfit she has had so far.

"Do you like it?" neteyam asks, a bit nervous and anxious to hear her response. Smiling happily, her bright eyes looking up at him, " I LOVE it! its perfect!" her bell like laughs rings in his ears, a pleasant sound he enjoys hearing. Little bite gives a twirl for him, the dress flowing lightly, giving her a soft look.

"I am glad you like it" neteyam replies. He lays down, letting the warmth of the son cover him like a blanket. Little bite climbs on top of him. Looking like a mountain in her eyes. She goes to his right eye and gently poke his eye lid. "Neteyam? are you gonna take a nap?" she asks. Neteyam smirks, "yeah, the sun feels good right now, we can head back later".

Little bite agrees and decides to lay on his nose as her napping spot. Since she hardly weight a thing, it wont cut off the air circulation for her blue friend. Letting sleepiness take over, both get a comfortable and sleep away through the warm afternoon sun.

Aaaaaaaaand that is all for this one! Happy birthday anon! I hope you enjoy this fic as my present to you. Enjoy~!! ^^

Tsyeytsyip = Tiny bite

[cosmica-galaxy]

Awwww, that's okay and understable! There's sm fanseries nowadays that I just don't even know where to start ^^;

But speaking of fanseries tho, if you could make your own ST animated fanseries (with a team and all if you like), what would the plot be about? I'm sure you can come up with an interesting one since you already make the concept of hardware mimics interesting 👀❓

Oh, I would DEFINITELY make a fanseries that is primarily just from the perspective of a human soldier that is trying to survive the war. Kinda like how my own story for my human is. The episodes are all strictly in their perspective, though. In fact, I would love to model my mimic bois and use them as characters that eventually join up with the protagonist. As tradition to the human being a self insert, I won't show the human at all, so their appearance would be up to interpretation. Animating how I envision the mimics behaving would be so fun to do, tbh! I have no knowledge on how SFM works, but I think I would be willing to try and take a crack at it! I'm also hopefully gonna get employed soon, so if I manage to save up enough money, I may consider looking into getting a project going for it, if I'm committed enough. Maybe I'll start smaller and just commission or hire an artist to help me make that dating sim yall want so much. XD So many ideas and so little time~

[partywithoutsmiling]

Does barb hired the bounty hunters again to look for poppy and branch if so I can see them reluctantly accepting just because they are scared of her of turning one of them into monsters and if poppy and branch see hickory again i think they will try kill him especially poppy

Ah, sorry, I don't think you have the hang of the character portrayals as presented in the Canon, let alone in what I have in the AU XD;;

Going by the Movie Canon, it was clear the Bounty Hunters were comfortable in the Rock Territory- if that didn't imply that Rock Trolls were their frequent clients, I don't know what will.

However, up until Barb's little show on the Stage, I don't think either of them actually understood what she was actually planning. It seemed to me, that they thought her little conquest as he just politically suppressing the right of other Genres to freely express their music, not actual brainwashing/mind domination deal, so all of them were fighting essentially for the right to be an independent country (and autonomy I don't think they had up until that point, hence why they were bounty hunters)

In my AU, they would be the first to book it honestly; even if Barb wanted to employ them again (which she would not, as right now she is rather occupied by wrangling some sort of authority over her own trolls and doesn't have the time to deal with Trolls who are loyal to her only for cash at best), they would make sure to be nowhere near where she could threaten them into compliance; I would rather wager they would all run back to their respective Genre communities and spread tales over what happened, and most likely try and get their kin get up and move out of the Trolls Kingdoms.

Then we have the question of Branch and Poppy. Yes, I admit both of then showed rather merciless and violent tendencies when it came to Creek- but honestly, that little sleazeball just sentenced all of their people to death, and there doesn't exist any sort of mercy for the likes of him.

Hickory, on the other hand, while ultimatelly being revealed as one of the enemies, was a reluctant one at best- and even though Branch distrusted him the most, he came around to semi-accepting him at the end before his and Poppy's argument, and when he is in his right mind, I doubt he would just needlessly try and kill a troll; his carnage following his transformation was him acting completely out of control and something he probably won't even remember when he snaps out of it.

Poppy would never try to kill anyone (Creek aside). That's just not who she is- and while Hickory's betrayal hurt her, it was not the kind that she wouldn't forgive. Hickory's betrayal was non-malicious; by the point he did, Poppy was already learning the lesson of trying to appreciate all music, differences and all, and she would be able to understand his reason for lying, even as it hurt. Since he clearly tried to get her to hide the String and run away before she could be discovered (even if it came little too late), that 'redemption' is something she would remember.

So no, I don't believe either Branch or Poppy would act overly hostile towards the Bounty Hunters; maybe towards Chaz, but certainly not to the point of actually wanting to commit murder.

[itsyourstarboy]

Streamer!Honey Headcanons Pt.3

First Part Next Part

It’s about damn time I made part 3, and this is, once again, less headcanons and more just Guy interrupting Honey’s stream

Okay so, we’ve talked about how Honey’s fan base likes to theorize on their and Guy’s relationship. Some fans think they have mutual crushes on one another, some think they’re secretly dating, some think they’re just roommates.

Chat asks Honey questions about their love life all the time, and Honey has fun by always giving vague answers.

Even Guy has joined in on occasion.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

★someone donated $1★

HoneysHeaven: are you single??

"Guy, what the actual fuck."

Answer the damn question 👁️👁️

Not him flirting in front of 176k people 🤣🤣

HoneysHeaven: are you though??

My man's is just shooting his shot, give him a break

Honey pinches the bridge of their nose and sighs, though the way the corner of their mouth twitches upward is poorly hidden. "No, I'm not single."

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

✍️[Honey]✍️is✍️not✍️single✍️

OH SO NOW WE GET A STRAIGHT ANSWER

OOOOHHHH B))))))

CLIP FOR PROOF CLIP FOR PROOF NO TAKE BACKS

📸📸📸📸📸📸📸

📸📸📸📸📸📸📸📸📸

Wait but is Guy single?

That's the real question ^^^

HoneysHeaven: I'm dating the most loving, caring, sweetest person in the world 🥰🥰

AAWWWWW

IM GONNA BARF

So not [Honey] then?

XD

HES SO WHOLESOME OMFG

AGSKSGSKDGDKF

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

SOMEONE SAID SO NOT [HONEY] THEN 😂😂😂😂😂😂

LMAOOO

DAMN BRO WHO PISSED IN YOUR CHEERIOS???

—

And even when he's not there, Chat often speaks on his behalf.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

★someone donated $5★

When are you going to ask out your roommate?

"I don't have a roommate."

Machoke? More like choke me-

YES YOU DO??

tf

LIAR LIAR PLANTS FOR HIRE

Who the hell is that dude in your house then 🤨🤨🤨🤨

GUY THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT GUY WHEN ARE YOU GONNA ASK OUT GUY

THIS IS BULLSHIT WE CANT TAKE THEIR WORD FOR IT

Is Guy in the chat rn?? We need to check your sources

"I am not lying, I swear on my goldfish's grave. Guy isn't my roommate, he's just some stray that followed me home one day and now he won't fucking leave."

Ouch

THAT WHY HE LOOK LIKE A WET NOODLE??

Nah nah, we all know you keep him around on purpose 😏😏😏

WE DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE-

A WET NOODLE!? EXCUSE ME!?

★someone donated $20★

Go ask Guy out right now and I'll give you another 80 dollars

Honey scrunches their nose and hums, as if thinking, "I'd love to, but... Guy isn't here right now."

NOOOO WE WERE SO CLOSE

BRIBERY WORKS BUT AT THE WORST OF TIMES

Where is he???? He's not supposed to be outside all alone :(

YOU'D LOVE TO??? 👀👀👀👀

WHAT THEN CALL HIM OR SMTH

YES

CALL HIM

PUT HIM ON SPEAKER SO WE CAN SAY HI

"wha- I can't just call him, he's at work. Do you guys want him to get fired?"

NO

No

Change of plans, we can wait until next stream

We'll get 'em next time boys

It's for the best, no one wants to get asked out over the phone

True true

Teaching [Honey] How to Flirt; Lesson 152: don't ask someone out over the phone

°•°•°•°•°•°

★someone donated $10★

Is Guy there?

"yeah...?"

★someone donated $70★

Cool cool heres the last of that 100 I promised you, now go ASK GUY OUT

OMGOMGOMG

ITS HAPPENING EVERYBODY STAY CALM

AAAAAAHHHHHHH

I SAID STAY FUCKING CALM

AAHLFVAKCBGSNAFAGRCKXN

Sorry

YES YES YES YES YES

👁️👁️🤳 I'm ready and waiting

Honey smirks, and pulls off their headphones. They get out of their chair and open the door to the hallway.

They then sit back down in their chair, yell "GUUYY" (which has him stumbling over himself because they never yell for him like that), and wait.

Guy rushes to Honey, but stops short of entering the room when Honey puts their hand out, "no, no, don't come in, I'm still streaming."

Guy puts a hand over his heart and let's out a breath, "holy shit, Honey, I thought you were being murdered or something." Then he laughs that adorable laugh of his because he's so precious.

Honey can't suppress the chuckle that bubbles up in their throat, "no, I'm fine. Chat just wanted me to ask you something."

Honey spared a quick glance at their monitor, biting their lip to try and hide the devilish smirk that was forming across their features.

ITS HIM ITS HIM

MY BOOOYYYY

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRDDDHDHHDJJ

What the hell is happening to you people y'all need some jesus tf 🛐✝️✝️

THIS IS IT THIS IS WHAT WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR

I DONT NEED JESUS I NEED A FUCKING STRAIGHT JACKET HOOOOOOOWWEEEEEEEEEE

Oh my god 🙊🙊🙊

🎶the best time to wear a striped sweaterrrrr🎶

Guy giggles, "what?"

Honey fails at their weak attempt to hide their smile, biting their tongue as a last ditch effort before giving way, "get out."

Guy laughs through his words, a more confused tone taking place as he repeats his last question, "what?"

Honey stands from their chair again, and leans against the open door. The way it opens inward perfectly covers Guy from view of the camera.

They lean in, a loving smile splaying their lips and lighting up their eyes as they grasp the collar of his shirt to pull him in.

Chat can't see how their faces are only inches apart, they can only hear how Guy let's out a sound of surprise.

Honey plants a chaste kiss on the corner of Guy's mouth and then loosens their grip on his collar in exchange for placing their hand flat on his chest.

Chat can only hear Honey repeat, "get out," when they gently shove Guy backwards so they can close the door again. Their face displays a cheeky grin as they stifle a soft laugh at the sound of a very flustered, and probably offended, Guy.

Then they sit back in their chair and turn their attention back to their stream.

WHAT THE ACTUALLY FRICK WAS THAT??

NOOOOOOOO

DONT GO BACK TO PLAYING UNDERTALE LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED EXPLAIN YOURSELF RIGHT NOW

★someone donated $20★

YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO ASK HIM OUT??

Honey feigned confusion as they quirked an eyebrow at the message, "I did ask him out."

NO TF YOU DID NOT

They did not just say that

I

Want

To

Murder

GODDAMNIT

Calm down satan

THIS IS TOO CRUEL EVEN FOR YOU

NOOOO HE SOUNDED SO CONFUSED 😭😭

"I really don't understand what you guys are talking about. I asked him to get out, that's what you all wanted."

MOTHERFU-

THAT IS NOT WHAT ASKING SOMEONE OUT MEANS AND YOU KNOW IT

Teaching [Honey] How to Flirt; Lesson 153: asking someone out means to ask someone on a date

SHUT UP

THEY ALREADY KNOW THAT THEY'RE JUST MEAN

I want my 100 dollars back /hj

[Honey] is deceitful and finds joy in manipulating the emotions of others. I believe they may be some kind of sadist.

Kinky

Y'all need to chill fr

GUYS GUYS LOOK SOMEONE CLIPPED IT HE CALLED THEM HONEY 🥺🥺

"oh, shi-"

—

Honey has adjusted their streaming schedule to line up with Guy's work schedule. This way, he will interrupt them less.

It's a win win for the both of them, because when Guy gets home after a day at work, all he wants is love and affection which he cannot get if his honey is streaming.

But there are times when the stream goes on longer than expected, or Guy gets off early.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Honey was playing Life is Strange when they heard the front door open. They paused for a moment, expecting to hear Guy's usual "Honey, I'm home" call to announce his presence.

But it didn't come.

They paused the game and lowered their headphones, confusion evident on their face as they turned in their chair slightly, listening to the sounds of Guy putting down his work bag and taking off his shoes.

When the noises stopped, Honey assumed Guy must've just had a long day. They decided they'd check on him after they wrapped up this stream.

A few minutes went by; Honey had nearly forgotten Guy was home, it was so quiet.

★someone donated $1★

HoneysHeaven: Honeeyyy :(

There he is.

The way he typed out their nickname and added a frowny face made them feel soft, and they practically had to physically restrain themself from going, "what, baby?"

Instead they said, "what is it, Guy?"

awwww

He's calling them Honey 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Who made our boy sad??

HoneysHeaven: I'm dyiiing :((

I want to kiss chloe so bad u have no idea

WHAT

OH NO 😰

SOMEONE CALL 911 🚑🚑🚑🚑🚑🚑

NO GOD PLEASE TAKE ME INSTEAD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Honey left the room without a second thought, their feet leading them straight to where Guy had bundled himself up on the couch. The TV was on, playing the cartoon network channel for some reason, and the lights were off save for a table lamp.

Holding his phone in front of his face while he lay on his side, he turned to look at Honey when he heard their footsteps.

His hair was a mess, he had bags under his eyes, and his cheeks were flushed.

"Honeeyyy," he pouted, his voice coming out strained and scratchy.

Guy had come home sick.

They checked his temperature, got him a cold cloth, brought him medicine, and basically played nurse before finally returning to their stream.

They'd only been gone for 15 minutes.

WHAT DO WE DO WHAT DO WE DO

OH GOD THIS IS TERRIBLE

WE HAVE TO SAVE THEM THATS WHAT WE HAVE TO DO

EVERYONE CALM DOWN

WE GOTTA CALL THE NAVY

What is happening?

I CANT TAKE THIS THE STRESS IS TOO MUCH

I hope Guy is ok 😭

THE ROBOTS ARE RUNNING THE NAVY

NOT THE NAVY 😰😰😰😰😰😰

Guys I'm getting in my helicopter, who wants a ride?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ME

ME

ME TOO

🚁🚁🚁🚁🚁🚁

WAIT EVERYONE THEYRE BACK

Honey gets back to find the chat in utter chaos, but they assure them that everything is fine. Guy is just dramatic.

Things went back to normal for about half an hour.

But then the door opened, and two hands appeared, just in view, flat on the floor.

Honey turns around to see this, "Guy, what are you doing?"

They only get a tired groan, that sounds more like a whine, in response.

Oh nooooo 🥺🥺

Our boy is sicky ☹️☹️☹️

❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

I'll get the rabies shot ready

Honey crouches in front of Guy, who is sprawled out face first on the floor. "Are you wearing my hoodie again?"

Another hum of discomfort. He really isn't feeling well.

They place their hand on his head and pet his hair, tilting their head slightly and speaking in a low voice, "what do you need, baby?"

Guy made "hmph" noise, and tapped his hands which were still stretched out in front of him.

Honey stood, and made their way back over to their computer.

Hope he gets better soon ❤️

Aw my goodness he's wearing their hoodie 😍😍

I'm sick too me and guy are twinsies fr

Are we just gonna ignore that th-

They ended the stream. They don't have time to do their regular sign off, they have a sick Guy to take care of.

[mcytrecursive]

Nomination Overview - Crack Fic

Oh boy do we have some bangers in this category. Not as many fics here, but every one a gem. I'll give you a hint: we've got mangoball.

Title: And why are you British now?  Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48950557/chapters/123691441#workskin Fandom: Hermitcraft SMP Author: ace_of_arthropods Relationships: Grian & goodtimeswithscar, Jimmy solidarity & zedaph, rendog & bigb, Joehills & Martyn  Characters: Jimmy solidarity, Joe hills, grian, goodtimeswithscar, zedaph, Martyn inthelittlewood Length of the work: 11,506 words (incomplete fic) Genre: Crack Fic, Fluff Type: Fic Summary: “Wait a second...” Grian suddenly had an idea of what might have happened. He hastily dug through his horribly unorganized inventory for something with a mirrored surface. He eventually found a hand mirror with golden decorations, which he'd never seen before, and looked into it. A scarred face with dark green eyes looked back at him. “Oh no,” Grian said, in Scar's voice. (After double life, everyone returns to their home servers... or rather, their soulmate's home server, in their soulmate's body. Shenanigans ensue.)

__

Title: Sapnap's Naga Harem Rating: E-rated Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49846090 Fandom: Dream SMP Author: ollie_oxen_free Relationships: Sapnap/Philza, Sapnap/Technoblade, Punz/Sapnap, Quackity/Sapnap, Dream/Sapnap, Karl Jacobs/Sapnap, Awesamdude/Sapnap, Sapnap/Foolish, Sapnap/Schlatt, Sapnap/Wilbur Soot Characters: Sapnap, Dream XD, Dream, Philza, Technoblade, Quackity, Punz Length of the work: 27,870 words (incomplete fic) Genre: AU, Crack Fic, Fluff, Fantasy AU, Humour, Romance, Smut Type: Fic Summary: Fresh out of school with a Masters in Magical Zoology, Sapnap is hired by a mysterious billionaire he knows only as XD to become one of the main caretakers of a new section of his magical menagerie. He's not sure what he's expecting, but ten fucking naga— rare, dangerous, mysterious— were not on the fucking list.

__

Title: A Jackerella Story Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/38446057/chapters/96084898 Fandom: Dream SMP Author: wetchickenbreast Relationships: Georgenotfound/Jack Manifold Characters: Jack Manifold, GeorgeNotFound, TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot, BadBoyHalo, Tubbo, Ranboo Length of the work: 6,328 words (incomplete fic) Genre: AU, Crack Fic, Drama, Fantasy AU, Humour Type: Fic Summary: Jackerella's life fucking sucks. Her goddamn parents died (how inconsiderate) and now she is stuck living as an indentured servant for her evil stepfamily. Her younger stepsister bites people (he won't stop no matter how many doctors they bring him to) and his older stepsister is a megabitch (also a homewrecker). His only friends are talking rats, so Jack is pretty much waiting on a miracle to get out of this mess... and that miracle comes in the form of a charming prince, some glass shoes, and a demon from hell (and the demon has MASSIVE tits).

__

Title: pov: me when i fucking Get You Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/45823945 Fandom: Dream SMP Author: doingthewritethings Relationships: Quackity/Wilbur Soot, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade, Quackity & Slimecicle Characters: Quackity, Wilbur Soot, Technoblade, Slimecicle, Eret Length of the work: 3,450 words Genre: AU, Crack Fic, Family, Friendship, High School AU, Humour, Modern AU, Chatfic Type: Fic Summary: From: qln@dsmp.org To: csc@dsmp.org what would you do if hypothetically speaking. there was this guy. and he was horrible and awful and his hair was so fluffy like sooo fluffy like imagine putting a mop on his head. like a big old mop. or a dog. but instead of being a wet dog he smelled like cinnamon and was probably really good to pet. ohhhh my god. or, the one where Wilbur thinks they're dating, Quackity thinks they're enemies, and Eret thinks she would really, really, really like to get things done in her student council meetings.

__

Title: Cheater, Cheater (Mangoball) Link: https://glittering.world/mangoball/classic Fandom: Video Blogging RPF Author: mangobaii Relationships: Dream/George, Corpse Husband/Wilbur Characters: Dream, George, Corpse Husband, Sapnap, Quackity, Karl, Wilbur, BadBoyHalo Length of the work: 20k-ish? Depends on how you count usernames and such Genre: Crack Fic, Humour, Epistolary, Mangoball Type: Fic Summary: DNF social media epistolary fiction. George gets cheated on by Sapnap with Dream; love blooms, among other things.

__

See something you want to offer or request in the exchange? Horrified that a classic of the genre isn't represented yet (to be fair, maybe we didn't get permission). Join our discord and sign up today!

[slashingdisneypasta]

I was looking at your post of which Disney Princes the Weasels would be, and it got me thinking; which princesses would our gals/their S/O's would be? I hope this assessment puts a grin on your face XD and that I got your OC's right ^^

Lottie: Mulan. There was no hesitation in my mind with this one. Tough, badass, and military trained, but also loves her family to pieces. And they both got silly sidekicks too XD (Mulan has Mushu and Cricky, and Lottie has her unkles and cousins XD)

Shiny: I feel like Megera is the best candidate, even if she isn't an official disney princess. They're both sarcastic queens who have troubled histories, especially with men, and they both are soft inside ^^ and they both know how to seduce to get what they want, even if Meg hadn't been successful with Hercules in the way she expected.

Jane Doe: ... Sleeping Beauty, because they both are hiding from evil forces and don't appear so often? I'm sorry! I know Jane deserves more 😭😅 if it helps, it's also because I think they're both underrated (Sleeping Beauty was/is actually my favorite princess, despite how people feel about her and her movie). Another candidate I offer is Nala, as they are both are the half of their relationships that bring the best out of their partner, and are playful but also level-headed and focus on what's most important (Jane Doe on keeping Teddy safe, and Nala on bringing peace and order back to the pride lands)

(This moment between Nala and Simba definitely happened between Jane and Wheezy. You can't convince me otherwise XD ^^)

Poppy: I was gonna say Cinderella, but then I remembered that Psycho is Lucifer the cat, and got sad because that'd mean he'd be mean to her and make her life harder (and she would threaten him with a broom) 🥲😆 but that's fine, because I think Snow White is her best fit; they both are comparatively naive to the others, they both have messed up things either happening to them or that have happened to them. They both befriended a group of rowdy bachelors who would chase a wicked witch off a cliff for them, etc. And Poppy wishes she could sing in a well about her love life and her soulmate would appear like Snow XD (Also, something I've wanted to write is Percy and Penny watching Snow White for the first time and saying that their mother looks like a rabbit Snow White- and in turn asking dad if that makes him prince charming XD ^^)

(☝️This old lady Rena trying to seduce Poppy? I'm sorry I'll stop-)

Rena: She ain't a disney princess. I won't let those big blue eyes fool me. She's a wicked old queen. Rena and Yzma are both wicked, fabulous, crazy oldies with impeccable fashion taste. They both have weapons in equally sus and convenient(?) places. They both have very clear types (I'm with you; Yzma hired Kronk not just for a henchman), and can get people quickly on their side (Rena is more friendly than Yzma, but you saw how quickly Yzma got the palace under control... Granted, that's probably partially due to them not caring about Kuzco's 'death', but my point still stands-)

These are my votes! If I got your OC's wrong, I apologize xD but this was fun to do! ^^

I love these so much!!!

Especially Jane Doe as Nala and Rena and YZMAAAAAA absolutely perfect and I love it so so so much XDD

And hey, maybe Poppy should threaten Peycho with a broom in some of our AU's 😅😅😅😆 Even the regular timeline.

OMG!! That Percy and Penny bit is so CUTE! XD I must know how Psycho would respond to that XD I must have Smartass, Greasy or Wheezy walk by and laugh-

And Shiny as Meg <3<3<3 I feel so soft about that. Obviously that is perfect XD ^^

Thank you so so much for sharing!!

[thekitsunesiren]

Writing Commission Info

Hello there! As it states, I am starting to offer writing commissions. I'll still be making prompts and things for free, but I think that this will be a good way to be motivated and make a bit of money on the side as well.

If you are new to my page, you're free to look through my page to see my writing style and see if I am the one for you! (ao3 was down, so I finally had the time to post this! XD)

What I'll Write:

I'll be writing the following:

Prompts

Imagines

Headcanons (Dating/Sibling/Friends/Etc.)

Reader-Inserts (still new to this writing style)

Oc's

Follow-up stories of any of my previous prompts

Fandoms I'll Be Writing For:

Dc x DP

BNHA x DP

MCU x DP

Boku no Hero Academia

Danny Phantom

Steven Universe

Marvel

DCU

Dragon Raja

Harry Potter

Naruto

Pokemon (Ketchum Centric)

Into/Across the Spider-Verse

Genres I'll Be Writing For:

Romance

Family

Angst

Comedy

Fluff

Action/Adventure

What I Won't Be Writing For:

I just want to make it very clear that I will not be writing any of these types of categories/genres:

Underage

NSFW

Age Gap

Student/teacher

Incest

P*dophilia

R*pe or anything of the like

Slavery

Important: This would be the time for me to say that I do have the right to turn down any commission offer given to me if I believe it doesn't suit my writing styles or what I write for.

Payment Methods: I'll be accepting payment through either my Ko-fi Page here, or through Cash App. I will accept payment either upfront or after I finish the commission. If you choose the latter, I will message you for about the post and that will be the time for you to pay.

Pricing Menu:

Writing Style:

Prompts = $10 USD

Imagines = $10 USD

Headcanons = $10 USD

Reader Inserts = $10 USD

Oc's= $20 USD

Follow ups of any of any of my previous prompts = $15 USD

Fandoms: Free

Genre's: Free

Characters: Free

Word Count:

500 words = $5 USD

1k words = $10 USD

2k-4k words = $15 USD

5k words = $20 USD

Anything higher than that will be a negotiated price and we can discuss it as we talk. Of course you won't be priced if I write over the limit by a few words or so. so there's no need to worry about that.

Contact

If you are interested in hiring me for a possible commission, you are free to message me on here, or on my ko-fi page to discuss the commission and payment.

Where It's Posted

Each commission will take up to two weeks for it to be finished. When it is, I will notify you that is up both in the messages, and you'll be added in the post. It will only be posted on either my tumblr or Ko-fi unless given permission to post it anywhere else like ao3.

Alright! That's everything for now! This will be updated at anytime, but I'll leave it as is for now. Commissions are currently open and I hope to see you all soon!

[cadrenebula]

What has Stefan been up to while I've been too busy this summer with rl things? Helping his cousin set up a cafe in Ishgard. (It was his excuse for being nearby when he went to Story Hall. :D)

Lothaire decided he needed a safe place his mother or anyone she hires would not likely look too closely at. As well as he wanted a safe space for people like Alexois if they have work to do in Ishgard. (Remember Alexois is an assassin known as the Jackal of Coerthas.) The door to the back safe rooms is hidden from the average person and spell locked (courtesy of Stefan) against anyone with ill intentions towards anyone written on the safe list. (Hope you like being turned into a frog if you trigger the spell.)

So Lothaire got both Bran and Stefan to help him with the setup of the business front. Lothaire is good with numbers and can easily run the business as he was trained since he was young to handle the family business of the Aurifore. (He just doesn't want to deal with the black market like his grandfather and father. He wants to actually earn his money in better ways.) However he wanted the help of Bran and Stefan with picking out books, furniture, and sweets for the cafe. As well as overall look of it. He intends for coffee and tea to be free but the sweets and other specialties cost money. Books can be enjoyed there or bought to be taken home.

This also gives Lothaire a safe place to spend time with his older brother, Lancefer.

Why does he allow an assassin to use this as a safe hideout? Alexois helped save his life. As well as Alexois and Lancefer used to be friends a long time ago. (Their friendship is on the mend atm.) Lancefer might not have survived his trauma without his friendship to Alexois. Plus Alexois is an assassin with morals. (He won't kill women or children. Only exception to the women is if they are abusing people or trying to kill him. Trust me he's more than tempted to kill Lady Aurifore for her crimes against her own family.) So Alexois has more than earned Lothaire's respect and trust.

The safe hideout part might eventually include Asher in time. Possibly others of my morally gray characters. He got this idea from Alexois' wife, Sanagi. An while it's main benefit is for my own characters and a couple friends, doesn't mean other can't make a connection with my own kids an consider it their safe space too. (Please note the backrooms haven't been OOCly built yet. XD Coming soon.)

The house is located on Goblin. Empyreum Ward 25 Plot 59. I doubt I'll ICly run it myself (considering it's myself and 2 friends in FC). But it is NPC staffed if people want to use it for RP things. The upstairs is setup as the reading area with the cafe itself being downstairs (cause heat rises so it will help keep the reading area warmer against the chill of Ishgard). It's ICly owned and run by Lord Lothaire of House Aurifore.

[peachymilkandcream]

Collecting Dust|Levi x Evelyn AU

Request from AO3: "You write very well, you could make an AU where Levi is a nobleman and Evelyn is a maid who just started working with him."

(A/N: This one will be a bit shorter, I usually take the weekends off so I only have a short amount of time to write this XD)

WARNINGS: implied noncon, dubcon, manipulation, domestic abuse, yandere themes, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, stockholm syndrome, violence, mind breaking, heavy on the misogyny, power imbalance, age difference, etc.

================================================

Evelyn stared at the large house in front of her. As someone who had come from such a poor background, it was magically to know that she had the privilege of serving such an amazing and influential man like Levi Ackerman. The nobleman who was known throughout the city as mysterious and strict. Many girls would give their left arm to be noticed by him, they wanted a taste of that mystery and a taste of his coin.

Evelyn didn't have the same goals and aspirations, she wanted more to make a good enough impression that her family would live a comfortable life without fear of the mortgage coming to ruin them. Debts were easily to accumulate in a economic climate like this, constant shut down of businesses because some rich asshole made regulations impossible to follow.

Hopefully Levi would be different, he was a rich and entitled asshole allegedly but his pay was better than most so she could afford her pride to save her family from debtor's prison.

Without hesitation, she launched into her list of duties. She had learned that Levi was a fickle man when it came to the quality of the services he was paying for. He demanded the best of the best and if that wasn't delivered then a swift dismissal would follow.

She hoped she would be enough for him.

================================================

She never saw him, and when she did he simply passed her by without so much as a downward glance. She hoped that this would continue, to work under his intense scrutiny was something she wasn't sure she could handle. He already made her nervous enough. She didn't more of that.

It wasn't until Levi tripped over her that he finally took notice of his newest hire.

"Don't you know to stay out from underfoot!?" The first sentence he ever spoke to her.

"Begging your pardon sir, it won't happen again sir."

"Who are you you little wretch. I must speak to my housekeeper and instruct her on what imps to hire and which to dismiss."

Tears welled up in her eyes at the thought of losing such a precious job. What was left but to throw herself at his mercy?

"Please sir, I'm begging you please don't dismiss me. It will never happen again, I vow to work twice as hard to earn back your favor, but please don't dismiss me-"

There was a pause of silence before he sighed, taking advantage of her vulnerable position to use his boot to push her head down further into the ground.

Evelyn could swear she heard him smirk, but the moment she ventured to meet his gaze it was full of emptiness and a lack of remorse.

"Is this the cleaning you've been providing for me?"

"Yes sir, I hope it is satisfactory."

He inspects it without moving his foot off her head. As if from just a look he can determine how dirty something is.

"This isn't even good enough to consider keeping you on."

Evelyn couldn't help it, quiet sobs burst out as the reality of her situation hit. She had tried her best but it was not enough.

"Quit your noise. I didn't say there was no possible way to gain my favor back."

She quiets, her heart beating fast as she considers the hope before her.

Now he takes the boot off her head. "Come with me."

================================================

Evelyn tried her best to flex her jaw without Levi noticing. The salty taste still in her mouth from her task of gaining his favor. It was humiliating, but Levi assured her she would continue to have a job. Now he was satisfied and she would never have to lower herself again.

Until the next time. When he took things further. And the time after that when he took it further still.

Her chores eventually stopped, giving way to Levi's demands and ridiculous appetite for her body. It was no longer about gaining his favor but threats of what would happen should she deny him. Threats Evelyn desperately didn't want to see come true.

When she missed her time of month, and pushing her down the stairs didn't work, Levi took drastic measures to maintain his dignity. However he wasn't impressed that his lowly serving wench had become Lady Ackerman, and made his displeasure of the whole arrangement known at night.

Although now there was no need to hide, and she had no right to refuse him. This was her duty now as a wife. And she must obey and serve her new husband, no matter how painful it was. It was her own fault for getting knocked up in the first place. Had she cleaned well she wouldn't be in this position.

Or at least that's what her husband told her, and who was she to have a thought on her own? No one. Just some serving wench.

[quinloki]

omg it's so hard to be a responsible adult and not stay up and have my little daydreams while I listen to music xD and I unfortunately have to work tomorrow since our company doesn't consider it a holiday T_T I'm glad I could send you something in return to kill you bc you always kill me <333

I think I can officially say I got the sabo brainrot, damn (jk)

omg okay so I was also thinking how you'd meet ace and I'm like duh school a man like whitebeard would prolly want his sons to go out and experience the world especially if they're running a major business! and I'm like omg imagine ace in college it opens up so many dumb shenanigans that you both have so much dirt on eachother and you really give him a good wack when you find everything out because you overlooked so much it made you mad! like ace would always treat for meals or drinks and you obvi talked about his job after college, but he never mentioned WHERE he was going to work in a mailroom!! or that it was his dad's company!! that bastard

lolol and for some (mild) tension you meet shanks and he is just like heavyyyyyy flirting and izou finds it hilarous how annoyed sabo and marco look (and pops is like leave my future daughter in law alone xDDDD)

the tension in that hotel room after everyone is aware of the shower xD throw in a little bickering over who should sleep where, bc obvi you're so shaken up right? and they argue over who's bed you should sleep in so they can comfort you >>

the polycule would be interesting I won't lie idk how the dynamics with those two in particular would be tho bc honestly they give me such similar vibes sometimes. I mean I read sabo/reader/ace sometimes but ace is a puppy dog so it's a different dynamic >>

I could picture like, sabo does the more dangerous work, so you're officialy dating marco the ceo and you get dressed up and go to events with him but sometimes his little brother offers to take you home bc you're soooo tired from interacting with all those business peeps and sabo is just such a good younger brother to take care of his bro's girlfriend such a gentleman (nvm that you're going back to sabo's room and not marco's) like rather than a poly they just both share bc you couldn't pick they're just both too good IDK MAN I JUST WANT THEM BOTH SO BAD T_T

ok but the riskiest part of being the weakness is the fact that pops basically parades you around and calls you his daughter in law and nobody can figure out exactly what it is that got him to favor you so much but you run with it when you need to (like when ace/luffy are being a little shit)

also random thought before anyone officially starts dating, you start going to events with ace bc you get hired for the company or something (maybe ceo's secretary >> since ace is gonna be the boss someday!!) and people just assume you're dating and when pops calls you the daughter in law they're like oh congrats to the lovely couple and you both just look at eachother disgusted bc ew, no (like you'd also rather lick his face than anything romantic bc you've seen him eat food off a bar floor and other disgusting habits and absolutely not) and then everyone is just confused (incoming shanks flirting at that moment sounds perfect xD) then you realize getting called the daughter in law means pops has some idea of what's going on and now you have to figure how much and how mortified you should be

So there's a comic out there called something like Him & Him & Him, that's basically a girl and three guys (an uncle and twin nephews), and it's porn with a dash of plot, but I like the way it was done. That comic makes me think of what Sabo x Marco x Reader would be.

Which, to make it concise, in the comic, the lady marries the uncle legally, but all of them live together, and it's like you were saying "Oh what a good brother he is, looking out for Marco's fiance like that."

So yes, yes I like that head canon very much. We were going to split this into two different Pick One endings, but fully polycule works too.

It certainly turns into Two Against One though, cause in this situation the reader is the puppy dog >.>

Gods the kink and dynamics I could explore....

heck, Kaz, HECK I already have plenty to work on but this is killing me. Marco brainrot is real, and Sabo is just rushing the gates I swear, and now all this - ALL THIS DELICIOUS chatter and idea swapping and head canoning and world building KAZ I NEED TO WRITE THIS.

The world can blame you, I'm making notes, it's going into the primary rotation. I'll finishing Birds of a Feather and put this in its spot and I hope you're happy (affectionate).

I love the secretary idea too and the misunderstandings XD

And I think Pops likes the reader because she's a capable fighter, and not afraid to defend people, and also his sons want to protect her and he's like "Yeah, no, I get it." but less romantic and more "This smol creature reminds me of Ace and I love them both." sort of thing XD

[jennyandvastraflint]

Xena reactions S1Ep5!

"And that one of their parents was made here" Ew, straights. (joking)

Uh oh.

"Places like this always have the best food" *dude tossed out the window* "And the best atmosphere"

Pls Xena just beating up people in the back

"Did you ever notice we never have trouble getting a table" dhdhdhsh

NOT THAT KIND OF HIRE SHDGDHSH GABRIELLE GETTING SUPER DEFENSIVE

Did Gabrielle start counting the gold shdhdhd

*kicks guy catcalling her*

Does she work for love

He looks like a sweet boy. (It's the big brown eyes)

Gabrielle wanted to see her new amulet xD

Awwww, "decide that you like it again" awwwwwwww... Gabrielle is worried.

Gabrielle talking, we love. She's such a clever girl.

Ohhh, he wants to fuel war to sell more weapons. Of course.

"Long live who"

Is that her bro? 😂 (Sorry I'll just assume everyone is her brother bc lovers? Bullshitttt)

Gabrielle babygirl xD

"I just called your bluff" shdhdh

"and therefore reasonable" 😂

"Perfect we're getting into the castle" I love Gabrielle have I mentioned

EW STOP LICKING HER HAND MARCUS.

I wuv Xena

And hate the guy

She's gonna double cross him

Xena keeping a woman from killing herself. She will always save a woman.

"I found it best to listen when Xena speaks" wise words 😌

Hehe Xena knocking out a guy. We stan.

I fucking hate the guy. The old man one.

"Never found someone to trust" BABES XENA GONN EXPLOIT UR TRUST

"There's something different about you" proximity to Gabrielle. "It's like now you have the answer." GJ HDHDHDS GABRIELLE. THE ANSWER IS GABRIELLE.

EW. SMOOCH

Ah fuck they chained Gabrielle up

Bäh. Get this straight man away. Xena is NOT into it. XD

Her being all innocent. GAH OLD MAN GO AWAY.

"His companion????" Xena, internally

Okay but Xena holding the girl's head did something to me. Idk what. But it was gay.

Men being veeeery toxic masculinity...

Urgh is Marcus gonna hurt them. He's so

"I don't wanna stand by your grave" // "Someday you'll be standing over my grave" "Or you over mine." or something in Dinosaurs on a Spaceship

No I won't stop the Doctor Who / Xena parallels

YES GIRL K.O. THE GUY

Urgh, Marcus c'mon

......

Of course he dies.

At least the capitalist weasel is dead

I AM VERY CLOSE TO CRYING OVER MARCUS OMG

*dies dramatically*

Not the burial

May he rest in peace

"To be remembered like that is a good thing" GABRIELLE MAKES ME CRY

I had a journey starting to like Marcus, and thrn obviously he DIES... I'm still gay, expect more reactions.