#it read like a bad first draft. it read like something i would write drunk or sleep deprived or ill or a combination of the three

[fingertipsmp3]

Reading an actual published book that is really, confidently bad gives me more confidence in my writing than just about anything actually

[bad268]

Publicly in Love (Frog Boys X Reader)

[Blank] in Love Pt 4

Fandom: RPF/Miscellaneous

Requested: Technically no, but I incorporated two requests from @youngcreatorlady and @goldenstarofthunderclan. I hope yall don't mind <3 Side note, I’m gonna start taking requests for Pezzy! I’ve been in a Pezzy mood and found out I really like writing for him lol

Warnings: none.

Pronouns: First person (I/me/they/them)

W.C. approx 220 each

Summary: Going public with the Frog Boys

As always, my requests are OPEN

MASTERLIST // HITLIST

~~

<-Part 3

Puffer

“Are you sure this is the best way to go about this?” I asked, looking back at Puffer from my spot on his lap. We were looking at the screen where he was logged into his Instagram with a drafted post of the two of us. He thought the best idea was to hard launch on Instagram and hope for the best. “You barely post as it is. This will give everyone a heart attack.”

“Would you rather join a live stream?” He asked back rhetorically, knowing I would not do well under the live scrutiny. “This is just easier.”

“Easier for who? You, me, or your fans?” I laughed back as I leaned my head onto his shoulder.

“You and me,” he whispered, wrapping his arms tightly around my waist. “If we did a live stream, it would be an hour or two of straight questions. If we post something, I can log off and we can completely forget about it.”

“You are devious. I love it,” I chuckled, looking back at the caption. “What are you going to say?”

“I don’t know yet,” He admitted, “What do you think?”

“Fuck it, we ball,” I replied, straightfaced before turning back to make eye contact, “Hard launch edition.”

“That’s so bad!” He laughed, leaning in to hide his face in my shoulder.

“You never said it had to be good!”

~~

Pezzy

Drunk Q&As were fun. Especially when it had been going on for a couple of hours at this point. Ever since I came back from visiting my family, my mentions have been blowing up with clips from the stream where I called Pezzy my favorite simp. It was while drunk that I remembered that Pezzy and I never confirmed or outed our relationship.

“Are yall roommates or what cuz damn I wish my roommate looked at me like that,” one of the comments read.

“Yeah, if his roommate also gets to go out with him,” I laughed, downing the last shot of soju. “I also get to kiss him, so that’s fun.”

“Fun?!” he laughed, almost falling off his chair. “Kissing me is fun?”

“What would you rather me talk about?” I quipped back. “I can talk about how mindblowing you are-”

“And that’s enough from you,” He slapped his hand over my mouth to stop me from talking. “You’re cut off. Don’t continue that thought.”

“I was going to talk about your bike but okay,” I groaned after I pulled his hand away from my mouth, but kept his hand in mine. “Anyways, chat. He’s mine, so back the fuck up.”

“So possessive, damn,” he laughed, pulling our intertwined hands up to place a kiss on my knuckles. “It's hot.”

“Nah, just jealous.”

~~

Droid

“Guys, I swear to god,” I groaned into my pillow. I agreed to do a sleep stream with Droid weeks ago, but now, it was honestly hell. Not only was I so drained from the day in general, I was not feeling at all social to put up a facade for the viewers. My social battery was dead, and I just seemed pissed, probably. “Can we not play the Buzz Lightyear commercial nine times in a fucking row?!”

“That’s what that noise was?” Droid asked as he came back into the room with snacks and drinks. “Did yall make them insane or what?”

“Shut the fuck up,” I wined as I covered my ears. Droid set the drinks and snacks to the side as he laid down on his side of the mattress we set up. He also leaned over to the speakers to turn them down a couple of notches before leaning back. Once he was situated, I moved his arm, so I could lay into his side. “Chat, don’t. Just don’t fucking say anything.”

“Yeah, they’re allowed to do this,” He said into the microphone as he pulled up the chat on his phone, reading through some of the comments. “We get it, they’re cute and tired. Shut it.” 

Despite the noise, it did not take long to fall asleep. And it certainly did not take long for the chat to notice either. However, it was not until chat started spamming at Droid did he noticed. “Guys leave my s/o alone. Be lucky they even agreed to this.”

~~

Grizzy

Being on a panel at PAX AUS was a highlight of any creator. To have been invited was unimaginable. I was invited to be on a panel with the Misfits along with Grizzy and Smitty. We had flown in a few days prior (with a load of delays, might I add), and now, it was finally the day.

Sitting on the stage was surreal. With Grizzy on my left and Tobi on my right, we started answering questions down the line.

“Next question is for Y/n and Grizzy, technically,” the fan started. Immediately, I knew where it was going, so I lifted my hand that was already holding Grizzy’s onto the table. The fan began stuttering as they gestured to our hands. “Um, I think that answers my question.”

“If the question was if Girizzy and I are together,” I said just to confirm, and I was met with a timid nod from them, “the answer is yes. We have been together for a couple of months now.”

“And before anyone asks, technically, they made the first move,” Grizzy added.

“I thought you were asleep!” I objected, turning to face him while still keeping the microphone in my hand.

“That does not make it sound any better!” Grizzy and the rest of the group laughed.

“Trust me,” Fitz interjected, “that does not make it sound any less creepy. And I even know the whole story!”

“Oh my god, shut the fuck up, all of you!”

~~

Part 5 ->

~~~~~

© BAD268 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.

[bqstqnbruin]

See You Again

I'm actually posting a fic for the first time in seven months aka the first fic I've finished in seven months peace love teaching

anyway, I wrote this for the lovely @wyattjohnston's summer fic exchange! I got to write for @selfindulgentpoorlywritten but I've never written for Nico before, so I hope you like this (I was fully inspired by my own mess of a life)

Edit since I’m a dumbass thank you to @kat-hearts for reading this first and being amazing ily 😭

One of the characters, Nat is nonbinary, and I did my best to make the reader gender netural, which I haven't done before on either account, so I hope I did it justice (if something is glaringly wrong, please let me know!)

Warnings: I was mean with the ending? A little? Also, some swearing, drinking, almost physical fighting

Word Count: almost 2.8k

_______________________________________

“When was the last time you saw him?”

You tried to shift through your memory to figure that out. In person, the last time was sometime in the first week of December about two years ago. Thinking about him, which thankfully didn’t count, would involve you giving a much more recent answer, way more recent than you would really like to admit. “I don’t remember.” 

“Well,” your roommate Nat says, looking down at their phone. “I have bad news.”

“Fucking hell,” you moan, tilting your head to hit the back of the seat of the Uber. You knew what they were going to say before the words even started to come out of their mouth.

“Nico is going to be there tonight. With all the guys.” You let out another groan, the Uber driver giving you a scowl through the rearview mirror. “I’m sorry! Jack didn’t know he was coming, or he would have told us way before we got ready.” 

You stare out the window, trying to think of all the ways that you could get out of this situation. You already paid for the Uber and didn’t want to pay for another one. You weren’t about to go somewhere by yourself, especially since the bar you were heading towards wasn’t within a reasonable walking distance if you were to go somewhere by yourself, and no way was Nat going to leave with you without Jack, and Jack, of course, wasn't going to leave without his teammates. 

“We can go back right now and I’ll tell Jack to have fun with his team instead,” Nat tells you as if they could read your mind. They put their hand over yours, trying to give you any sense of calm that was setting into your panic. “We do not have to be around Nico.” 

“What kind of person tells someone they like them but not enough to date them?” you mutter, knowing you and Nat have had this conversation many times on your kitchen floor, drunk and crying together at 2 in the morning. They had introduced you to Nico one night after a game when the team went out to celebrate. They had been dating Jack for about a year at that point, meeting him through his brother at Michigan and reconnecting when they both realized they were going to be in New Jersey together. Quinn had used the reasoning of, “he won’t know anyone in the state,” only for everyone to realize later that he knew Jack had been smitten with Nat since they met. If only you had been so lucky. 

You had known of Nico, obviously. How could you not? He was the captain of the Devils, the team you grew up surrounded by, the number one draft pick in the sport your roommate never shut up about. He covered your social media feeds without you really wanting them to and everyone you knew talked about what a great game he had the night before. You couldn’t escape the idea of him, no matter where you went. 

When you met him that night a few years back, there was something about him in person that you were drawn to. He had been just an idea to you, not someone you could think about as being real. You spent that entire night with him, your friends either wandering off or you too enthralled with Nico to notice that they were there. Nat and Jack were heading back to your place before last call, and you were left knowing that you had to see Nico again.  

He asked if he could kiss you, making you melt as his hand gently snaked its way to your cheek, pulling you close when you said yes and covering your mouth with his. You waited for his text the next day, anxiously checking your phone until he finally did after 3 pm. From then on, you told each other everything, texting each other whenever you could, him calling you and heading over to your apartment whenever he didn’t have an obligation to the team. You fell hard for him and you had believed that he felt the same about you. 

“The kind of person who doesn’t know what they have until it’s gone,” Nat tells you, trying to pep you up. “Hey, we can find you a guy that is just as hot as Nico tonight.” 

“I’m gonna move to Ireland and isolate myself with the spuds.”

“Act like you can be away from me for that long,” they tease, earning a laugh from you. “I’m serious, though. Tell me what you want to do, or who you want to do, and Jack and I will make it happen.”

You didn’t want someone just as hot as Nico, you wanted Nico. You hated the fact that there was more than one time that you had pulled up his messages on your phone, part of you unable to delete that conversation thread even though you knew it would be the healthy thing to do. But you weren’t known amongst your friends for doing what was best for your mental wellbeing, so you kept them, going back through the conversations you had in the four months you were seeing him. The last text was what haunted you the most, him telling you that he was going to be back in Switzerland for the summer and that he ‘didn’t want you tied down to one person’ while he was gone.

He said he would text you when he was back. 

He never did. 

There were multiple times when you wanted to text him, but you never did, either. 

“Yeah,” you manage to choke out. “Let’s do it.” 

You spend the rest of the ride in silence, trying to think of where in the bar you would be able to hide from Nico so that he wouldn’t see you. The guys were already inside, Jack telling Nat about 10 minutes ago that they went to start drinking as fast as they could. 

The bar was somehow muggy inside, as if the beer itself hung in the air rather than the sweat of the nearly one hundred drunk people that were crowding every square inch of the floor. Jack was easy to spot for Nat, his five foot eleven frame not the largest of his teammates, but still distinct enough that your roommate had left your side within seconds of entering to be with their partner. 

So much for finding you someone tonight. 

You tried to stay away from him, closer to Nat and Jack as best as you could, but they kept wandering off from you. The last thing you wanted to do was go with them when they were both on their way to drunk and have a history of doing slightly illegal things in the bathrooms at bars. 

You had to find someone to talk to. Any person who looked interesting. Any other guy on the team who you were friends with, but that was really only Jack, and that was really only because he’s dating Nat. Your phone was your only comfort, finding a table that had been pushed up against the wall and hoping that there was something you could doom scroll on that would distract you from looking towards Nico. 

He had the right to do what he wanted at the bar with his teammates. You weren’t together. 

“You ok?” you hear during a lull in the music, pulling you away from your phone for a moment. You didn’t know who was standing in front of you, one of the newer guys from the trade deadline that Nat definitely hadn’t introduced you to. He was waiting for you to respond, looking like he had wanted to sit down with you.

“Yeah, just, not a big ‘going out’ person.”

He lets out a nervous laugh, a smile that sends a jolt through your system that you hadn’t felt in a while. Since Nico, if you were really willing to be honest with yourself. “Me neither, honestly. I’m just here because I didn’t have anything else to do.” 

“I got dragged here with my roommate so they can be with their boyfriend,” you tell him, gesturing to Nat and Jack trying their best to sneak out of the bathroom, Jack’s shirt buttoned wrong, both of their previously neatly styled hair in a mess that you only saw after hearing them the night before. 

“So that’s the infamous Nat,” he says, taking the seat beside you. You nod as he continues, “Jack never shuts up about them. Not that Jack shuts up about anything or anyone, ever, but especially not Nat.” 

“I always knew he was a good one,” you tell him, introducing yourself so he knew you as more than just, ‘his teammate's partner’s roommate.’

“I’m Timo.” 

You spent the rest of the night bouncing between the table and the bar with Timo, him buying you every drink you wanted. There was something about him that was different, but you couldn’t focus all of your attention on him. 

He was talking about his time in San Jose while you were waiting for your next round of drinks. You couldn’t focus on a word he was saying, Nico within your line of sight talking to a girl. A really attractive girl, you might add. You felt your heart drop, feeling a lump in your throat forming faster than you could lie to yourself about that scene having no effect on you. Naturally, Nico would talk to other people. You hadn’t talked to him in two years, let alone seen him in person. Just because you couldn’t get over him, no matter how hard you tried, that didn’t mean he didn’t get over you.

“And then I got traded here, and I love it, so far,” you tune back into Timo, who is suddenly much closer than you remember. It’s just because the bar is loud, people are starting to crowd for drinks, and, fuck, you have to admit, he’s pretty hot. 

Nico was still watching. 

Timo took your hand, leading you off to the table where you were before, the drinks in your hand probably not ones that you needed to begin with. His free hand snaked its way to your waist, pulling you close to him. You could feel your heart racing faster with every inch he got closer to you. You wanted him to kiss you. 

You thought you did. 

“I’m sorry,” you pull away right as his lips were about to meet yours, tears starting to form in your eyes, leaving the drink he bought you in his hands as you ran from him. Your breath catches in your throat while you try to find Nat and Jack, just praying that they weren’t back in the bathroom or too intoxicated in general to help out. 

You heard Timo calling after you, somehow, through the volume of the music and your own drunkenness, breaking through and getting to you. You didn’t want Timo calling your name, you wanted it to be Nico. 

You needed it to be Nico. 

“Hey, hey,” you hear, feeling a familiar hand gently place itself on your arm. You turn around, Nico’s face a mixture of concern and fury. “What did he do?” 

“He, he,” you stammer, the tears falling faster the more you looked at him, every memory you had with him suddenly rushing back into your mind. “He didn’t do anything. You did.”

You yank your arm from him, trying to find anywhere to be in the building that didn’t have one of Nico’s teammates looking at you causing a scene. You knew he was following you, calling your name again and again over the music. People were starting to stare, but no part of you cared, trying harder to not let the tears that were burning your eyes fall down your cheeks. 

Nat and Jack were nowhere to be seen, the rest of Nico’s teammates trying to figure out what was going on when you burst through the front door of the bar, the cold fall air hitting your face as soon as you did. You let out a sob, trying to steady yourself against the wall of the building, sliding down to the ground while people waiting to get in tried to figure out if they should help you or if you were just another drunk person having some sort of meltdown that was none of their business. 

“Hey,” you hear, a soft voice coming from above you. “I’m so sorry if I did something wrong.” Timo slid down next to you. “I read the situation wrong, I thought you were also into me.”

“I am, I just,” you start, trying to think of what to say. 

“Hey, what the fuck did you do?” Nico yells, pulling Timo off the ground. “What did he do to make you cry?”

“Nico, stop,” you let out, Timo looking both confused and terrified by his new captain’s hand on his shirt collar. “He didn’t do anything.”

“What the fuck did I miss?” Timo asked, slowly trying to back away from Nico staring you down. 

“Why can you talk to other people and I can’t?” you ask him, feeling your sadness turn into anger. “You had no issue not talking to me for the last two years.” 

“I’m gonna go,” Timo lets out, barely loud enough for the two of you to hear and sneaking away before you could notice. 

“You didn’t want to talk to me,” Nico counters, taking a step towards you. “But you wanted to talk to TImo instead?”

“Where the fuck did you get that idea?” 

“You never texted me. You’ve spent the entire night avoiding me. You think I didn’t see you when you were by yourself on your phone?” 

“You were in Sweden. And you could have come up to me and talked to me, what was stopping you? Oh, that’s right, your new girlfriend.”

“Switzerland. And she’s not my girlfriend. I haven’t seen anyone in ages.”

“Wherever you were, you weren’t here,” you tell him, your back against the wall. How long had it been since he had last seen someone? There was no way you had been the last person he was with. “You told me you didn’t want to be tied down while you were back home. You didn’t even want to talk to me, because if you did, you would have.” 

“You’re joking,” he scoffs. “You think I didn’t want to talk to you? Every fucking day I have thought about how our conversations would go when I saw you after you get home from work. I would think about you telling me about your day, about everything you would tell Nat, or whoever you were seeing at the time. Every single person I saw in the last two years, I wanted them to be you.” 

You didn’t know what to say, letting Nico’s words sink in. “Then why didn’t you text me when you came back from Switzerland?” 

Nico took in a deep breath, closing his eyes and tilting his head up to the sky. “Because I thought there was no way someone else wouldn’t have realized how amazing you are. There was no way I could be someone who you thought was worth waiting for.” 

Nico takes a step towards you, his hand gently taking yours. This was a moment you had been thinking about since he left for Switzerland two years ago. You knew he was going to kiss you, having you pinned against the wall of the building. His free hand cupped your cheek.

“There you guys are!” Nat interrupts, them and Jack clearly having just finished up doing something they weren’t supposed to be doing. Nico steps away from you, clearing his throat, the red in his cheeks so noticeable there was no way even your roommate wouldn’t comment on it later.  “We’ve been looking for you, for um.”

“Long enough,” Jack finishes their sentence, a stupid smile covering his face. You knew he was lying, but no part of your brain was letting you focus on that. Nico leaned against the building, his arm up over your head. “The uber’s almost here. Are you ready to go?”

No. “Yes.” 

The three of you leave Nico standing there by himself, Nat and Jack falling asleep in the Uber as soon as it gets on the highway. 

You check your phone for the first time in a while, a lone notification popping up on your phone that hadn’t been there in almost two years. 

‘Nico, iMessage.’ 

[meownotgood]

how do you write so well ? can you give us any tips for anyone who wants to start writing fics ? :)

-anon from France (･ิω･ิ)

of course!!! I'm not gonna lie.... I wing a lot of stuff when I'm writing so I may not be the best at giving very solid advice 😭 but, I will share some tips that helped me, and maybe they can help you too!

practice! def the most obvious one, the more you write the more you'll be able to improve. but practice isn't just writing, you can improve so much more by reading as well. or even watching a show or playing a game, indulging in a story you really love, you can learn much from that story to improve your own writings as well

write like shit! I heard the phrase, "write drunk, edit sober" a little while ago, and it's so perfect to how I feel about the writing process. just write whatever ideas you have, don't stress about your first draft not being good, or not what you'd like. no one can write perfectly on the first try, that's where editing comes in, to smooth out wrinkles and make everything nice. it is perfectly okay if you can only write a simple outline right now because you can come back and make it beautiful. write "lol I don't know what to put here" and come back while editing, put "insert romantic scene here" and continue. and seriously, don't be afraid to write something that's "bad" or "cringe" because nobody will read your first draft but you! just speak from your heart and your head will take it from there! and if you write something you really don't like, you're under no obligation to let anyone see it. writing a bunch of crap is a part of the process. you can never improve if you put yourself down, and don't allow yourself someplace to start

find your own flow! everyone writes different, some environments might work better for you and some might not. some people write while listening to music because it helps, I cannot because my brain would turn pickled. some can write thousands of words per day, some can only write 100. do what is best for you, try different things to learn where your best flow state is. don't push yourself to write when you don't want to or more than you can, your best work will come when you are most comfortable.

write what you want! write the story you want to read. writing is hard, it's often frustrating, but the story you want to tell is something only you can do, that's why no one has told it yet. enjoy the process as much as you can, the bad and the good!

[folliesandfolderols]

Writing prompts day 21

From this prompt list. I set a goal of writing at least 150 words per day in 2024, which sounds pretty pathetic but if you take into account the fact that I haven’t written any fiction since 2019 it felt like a feasible target. And then somehow it turned into “I’m going to write a single interconnected story utilizing all of these prompts” which ?????, what can I say, I am incredibly foolish and there's no limit to my capacity for self-deceit. Anyway, it's fully drafted now, topped out at about 88k, and I'll be unlocking tumblr posts as I edit.

read from the beginning here

Days 19 & 20 here

***

24. “Say please.”

***

Tim fell back into bed as soon as he returned to the Nest and didn't wake up for thirteen hours, which might have been a new record for him. He was conscious of being annoyed before he even opened his eyes, but couldn't remember why until he had poured his second cup of coffee down his throat and his brain finally kicked into gear.

Oh right. Damian had been an asshole. What a surprise.

It wasn't until his fourth cup of coffee, drunk in between bites as he shoveled scrambled eggs into his mouth and typed on his laptop with his free hand, that he recalled his parting verbal shot and dropped his fork on his plate with a clatter.

"Oh, fuck," he blurted, and the horror in his voice echoed through the room.

He ran to his room to look at his phone for the first time since he'd fallen asleep, and found a chain of unread messages from Stephanie.

timothy jackson drake, what the hell did you DO

why is the baby bat down here punching the bag like captain america pining for peggy

I'm not joking he looks gray

like he's sick or something

except for where he's bright red

and he came storming back down here after you two talked so I’m guessing it was something you said

whatever it was I think it was pretty bad

seriously I know my therapist keeps telling me I have to stop triangulating but u might need to do something or debriefs are gonna be a shitshow

unless it was all his fault. idk I’m not ur mom

Tim swallowed, and swallowed again as he scrolled down the screen. Fuck. Fuuuuck. Damian might have started it, but Tim had brought the equivalent of a nuclear weapon to a knife fight. Shit. How tired had he been?

He texted back, i fucked up so bad steph and sent it before he could think better of it.

She responded fast, so she might have been waiting for his reply. No shit? well now u have to do ur least fave thing and I'm guessing it's gonna be pretty rough

Tim frowned. whats my least fave thing

She sent him a string of emoji in various states of sadness followed by, apologize u poor man. I know it burns to be part of the human race and have to admit it out loud

Tim sighed, but she wasn't done yet. A cascade of rapid-fire follow-ups popped down his screen.

and again I can't emphasize enough how little I give a shit if u and dami are fighting except that it makes everything awkward forever

and bruce gets all broody about it which is even more awkward

so pull ur head out of ur ass and pop his free too while you're at it because I was just waiting for him to throw some kind of fat joke at me

and I don't want to kill a young man

Tim snorted. say please

The three dots pulsed for a very long time, and he grinned. Finally, she replied, please, help me, red robin, ur my only hoe

lies i know ur friends

tim srsly pls just make things not suck

He sighed. mission accepted

good. I know he can be such an asshole but he rly did look like he was gonna puke

Tim dropped the phone on his mattress and buried his face in his hands, groaning. Great. Apology it was. Assuming Damian would even accept.

Days twenty-two and twenty-three here

[allylikethecat]

Ally!!! tuesday update is phenomenal as always! i liked thw “im here every tuesday” part it was very meta of you lol (even if it wasn’t intentional) This story is incredibly angsty atm and i have no complaints. To be honest the vibe is kind of reminding me of Queer in the sense that Matty is watching a mysterious man at a bar and getting wasting at the same time i also assume he’ll keep going back to that bar to try to see this mysterious man again. all i have to say is that you’ve got my attention and i’ll be listening to noah khan so i can get the full experience (any suggestions in where to start???)

🥤

Ahh Smoothie Anon!! It's a joy as always to see you in my inbox!!

First off, thank you SO MUCH for giving my Noah / Matty fic a chance - I know that there isn't really an audience for it but WOW am I having SO MUCH FUN working on it! I was kind of going through a rut with my writing and working on this fic has fully pulled me out of it. I'm glad that you liked the "I'm here every Tuesday" line lol Fictional!Noah performed at the bar every Thursday and Sunday in the original draft, then I was reading it over and I was like WTF Ally he should OBVIOUSLY be there every TUESDAY because TUESDAY is your day lol

I'm going to be honest... I haven't actually read Queer (I am silly spicy romance / romantasy trash) so the fact that they have a similar vibe is completely accidental but I will happily take it! Let's just say that Fictional!Matty will be meeting that mysterious bar stranger sooner rather than later 👀

AH Welcome to the emotional turmoil OMG I would say Noah's most recent album Stick Season is a great place to start if you're just getting into his music. The most popular songs off that album are Stick Season, and Dial Drunk. Homesick is another popular one and my personal favorite. Other favorites would be Forever, Orange Juice, and Growing Sideways. Call Your Mom is a tear jerker and No Complains is extremely Matty coded. From Busy Head my favorites are: Young Blood, False Confidence and Mess. From I Was / I Am my favorites are Bad Luck, Godlight, Hallow and Howling. From Cape Elizabeth it would be Maine and Anyway. Live from Fenway also features the previously unreleased song Pain Is Cold Water and I am absolutely obsessed with that live album - I was at Fenway Night One and it was a religious experience. But AH Noah Kahan!! I am so obsessed with him it's not even funny. I will admit though, the song featured in the middle of the chapter is actually Something in the Orange by Zach Bryan (it came on shuffle while I was working on the chapter and it just felt right? Noah and Zach Bryan also collaborated together for Sarah's Place which is another great one!) I've been very in my folk/country era working on this fic!

Sorry for all of the rambling omg I just LOVE talking about this fic and Noah and just AH thank you so much for reading and sending me this ask and being so wonderful and supportive. I look forward to hearing your thoughts on the next few chapters and also what you think about Noah's music!!

Thank you SO MUCH again!! I hope you are having a wonderful day and a fantastic rest of your week!

❤️Ally

[koroktsuya]

best friend

# starring: pining best friend!jeon jungkook, f!reader

# word count: 3K

# content: angst? deep pining, texts not screenshots, songfic, lyrics bleed into the story.

# summary: after a long time of hiding his feelings for you, something in jungkook seems to change, but what will you do about it?

# warnings: drunk behavior, bad decisions, swearing, a wet jungkook.

# a/n: (man i had to repost this due to many mistakes) uhhh so this is actually from this jungkook fic i started to write a while ago, i even have like half a playlist and a few drafted chapters. this might be a teaser, if it gets enough attention for me to start working on it again. also, the mentioned brother is Choi Yeonjun. this was originally written with an OC but here it's Choi Y/N lol. hope you enjoy!

Jungkook can’t help but think that he should’ve stayed at home, instead of being here, surrounded by all of his closest friends and still feeling so down, so alone. He checks his phone for the nth time as if his best friend’s name would suddenly pop up, even though he knows for sure that will not be the case.

You’ve been spending your day today with your dearest Jihyun. Fuck does Jungkook hate himself for setting the two of you up in the first place. Why did he ever even think of it as a good idea? In his search for someone to date you, he should’ve looked for someone with bad looks that wouldn’t look good next to you.

How and why didn’t he notice his feelings for you before that? He could've made you his, but no… guess it wasn’t meant to be. He wasn’t made for you. 

Y/N: Jungkookie!! Happy birthday <33

and you weren’t made for him.

Though it somehow seemed easy. Once Jungkook found out how he felt for you, he thought all he had to do was confess and ‘claim his spot’ to be your boyfriend. He was very wrong.

As soon as he sees the message the person he cares for the most in the world sent, he tries to suppress the grin on his face and the fluttering of his chest, too.

JK: Thanks!! :D

JK: How’s the romantic evening going?? 

While he waits for a response from you, he takes a glance at the place surrounding him. The party his hyungs threw to celebrate another year of his life. It seems everyone is having a good time, enough for the birthday boy’s sour mood to go unnoticed. 

Soon, his phone buzzes once more and it reads you’ve sent him a file, which he’s already betting won’t make him happy.

And indeed it does not, because not only is your pretentious, good-looking, asshole of a boyfriend in the frame, but also, you’re not even in it. What a waste of pixels. Right after the image, you send a few more messages.

Y/N: Great!!! He told me that to make up for being so absent because of practice, we’ll spend the rest of our night watching a ton of movies.

Y/N: This guy is truly wonderful. He brightens my day like no one else does <3<3<3

Well, damn. If he was sulking before, now there’s a black cloud with thunder and lightning on top of Jungkook’s head. 

He rolls his eyes. Now, usually he has no problem with playing the role of the best friend, he’s got tons of experience. It’s something he’s been doing for most of his life –though he surely didn’t use to pretend before, because he didn’t have a need to–, but this is just not the same. Now there’s this guy stealing the spotlight that your attention is. And Jungkook most definitely still wants to be your favorite boy.

JK: Wow, that’s just great!! I really hope you also make up to me for your absence today.

He’s definitely being petty, and not proud about it. Thankfully, you don’t make him wait long for your reply, so he can’t even stop to think and wish to be the one who makes your days.

Y/N: Ah, Jungkookie… I really am very sorry about not being able to make it to your party tonight.

Y/N: It’s just been so many weeks went by without seeing my boyfriend, I think I started to hallucinate!

Jungkook sighs, typing into the screen after staring at it for many seconds.

JK: I’ve been gone for long on various occasions, too!

JK: Do you think of me too as you lie awake?

This time, Jungkook knows your reply will make itself be awaited for a while, so he decides to stand back up to fix himself one more drink, just to sit back again. Halfway through his plastic cup, there’s a buzz from his phone.

Y/N: That’s different, you dummy!!

JK: *Sigh*

JK: I can’t wait to be your number one again. 

Y/N: Jungkook, did you seriously just type a verb between asterisks? Lmao, what is this, roleplay?

Y/N: Is this a throwback to 2013?

JK: Your ability to change subjects amazes me.

JK: I’m your number one fan, Y/N.

Y/N: And I’m yours, JK.

Please don’t judge Jungkook, don’t misunderstand him, either. You’re the most special person in his life, way beyond just being his best friend. And he’s well aware of your relationship with Jihyun and, if you’re happy with him, and seeing him only once a month –if lucky–, then there’s not much for Jungkook to do. He’s not gonna stand in the way of that happiness.

And he might be in love, but it’s not like Jungkook can offer you anything better than what your boyfriend can. You’re not famous, and if being with Jihyun and his ‘backup dancer for JYP’ schedule is difficult, Jungkook can only imagine how much worse it could be with his idol schedule.

Especially if you consider it’s 2018 and his career is taking off like he never imagined it could. Also, it’s nice to remember the fact that you’re his best friend.and have always been.

Jungkook loves you so much, he wants to break your heart and make you cry, with all the love this world holds. He thought he could continue to wait.

But suddenly, it was too late. Yugyeom called a while ago, he told Jungkook that after many months dating, goddamn Jihyun hyung was planning to make things with you fully official. Throwing in the possibility of moving in together and that sort of shit.

And Jungkook was on his own shit now. He had so many things to occupy his head with aside from the fact that Jihyun was doing things with you that Jungkook could now only dream of doing.

Yes, it’s wrong and he knows it, and his own members tell him that always. But Jungkook can’t do much about it, besides suffering and pining. It was exactly that thought what made him drink a little more than he should.

And do something he would probably regret for the rest of his dreadful existence.

After maybe an hour and a half, Jungkook decided it would be a good idea to walk out to the balcony the place had and he went for his phone, pressing the icon for the phone call’s app.

He searches for your name among his contacts and with the last of his alcohol soaked neurons and the wrongful thought that this was a good idea, he taps the little green phone, waiting for the ringing to start.

“... Jihyun, wait.” He hears you mumble, distantly, “Hello? Jungkook, are you okay?”

Ah, there it was, your beautiful voice. Better than any angel’s. 

“I‘m great, yeah” he manages to reply, with feigned calmness.

“You sure, Jungkookie? You don’t sound very well”.

“Let me tell you how it feels to be fucking great. I feel great, really”.

“Uhm, I’m not following– I don’t understand.” Me neither, Y/N. Jungkook thinks he’s only vomiting words.

“You need to be yourself Y/N. And love someone for loving you instead of someone really cool that makes your heart melt: you need someone who understands how you truly feel.”

“Jungkook–”

“You’re still my favorite girl. Even if you missed my birthday party.”

“Is that what this is about? Because I already told you I’m sorry, but it’s not even your actual birthday, yet– just a party because you’ll be on tour for your actual birthday. And I already said that I would make it up to you, okay?”

“That’s not what this is about,” Jungkook grunts, feeling his grip on his phone tightening, “ I hope you trust me and believe me when I tell you there’s no one else more beautiful in this damn world, than you”.

“Thanks? Look, Jungkook… Jihyun’s waiting for me, and–”

“Ah, that’s right. That hyung is… he’s something else. Is he your best friend now?” Jungkook hears you softly mutter under your breath ‘my what?’, but he doesn’t allow you to speak any further.

“Yeah, I mean, he must have taken the spot, if we consider the fact that you and I are not best friends anymore, haven’t been for a while.”

“We’re not?”

“No, Y/N, we’re not. Things have changed a lot and it seems you’re the oblivious one. Probably the only person who hasn’t noticed any of those changes.”

“That damn word… so, what? You’re finally telling me why even my own brother’s been calling me that for months on end, now?”

“Hmm, you’re gonna want to be my best friend, baby.”

“Baby? Jungkook, can we speak seriously for a moment? You’re pissing me off.” You sigh, tired of his behavior.

“How much did you drink tonight?”

“I’m rich, I’m famous, more than your dear little Jihyun could ever hope for and every day I wake up hotter than before. Everyone wants to be my best friend and you won’t be the exception.”

“Jungkook, I’m not asking again. For Christ’s sake just tell me, how much did you drink tonight?” when Jungkook only chuckles humorlessly, you decide it’s enough, “Y’know what? Forget it. I’m driving there to pick you up.”

“I say that I’m happy. I always say that I’m happy but no, no, no, no,” Jungkook’s voice sounds rough, and he seems to spiral in his own thoughts even as he speaks, “I haven’t been happy in a long time, and it’s all because of you, Choi Y/N. It’s all your fault.”

“Jungkook, wait. Jihyun’s leaving my place and I’m goint to pick you up, okay? I’m not far from where you are.”

“I know, I asked my hyungs to rent this place so you could come, because it’s not a long drive and it’s not one of those pretentious places you say only idols wish to attend to, so I thought it’d be perfect– everything was going to be perfect, but we had to ruin it… bye, Y/N.”

As Jungkook takes his phone away from his ear, he still listens to you exclaim something about –probably– not hanging up. He still taps the small red phone on the screen.

As the screen changes and shows him your contact info, he sees the picture he’s put to identify you, it’s you both together, he just feels so much.

So much love for you, so much pain from all his endless pining; a part of him knows deep down people were right, he should’ve just confessed, if not to be with you, at least to lift the weight from his shoulders and his heart, but he was so scared, and now he had gotten to this point, where the turmoil of feelings he had been dealing with now was flooding him with a need to yell and cry, he was just so afraid.

He can’t handle it, so he just does the first thing that comes to his mind, and Jungkook throws his phone into the air with all of the strenght he can gather.

He remains for what seems to be hours staring at the buildings and streets ahead. The small cars circulating and the even smaller people walking from here to there. It’s already late, but there’s nothing quite like Seoul’s nightlife. Always moving, always lit up, yet Jungkook’s spent the brightest months of his life and career, darkening.

“Jungkook! Come on, I’m driving you home,” you say, as soon as you get there. Jungkook only registers a femenine voice and an arm pulling him.

“Y/N, you made it!” Jungkook takes your silhouette in as you drag him back inside the party just to leave again. You’re wearing some baggy gray sweatpants that he knows you wear a lot to just be home, and an also baggy hoodie that’s oversized on you, which actually, used to be his. 

Your hair looks a little messy, but he still likes it, you just look so homey, he wants to hide in your arms and maybe sleep, or sob, or kiss your cheeks, maybe all of those in no particular order.

“--you heard me? Jesus, you reek of alcohol, let’s just go home,” you take Jungkook’s wrist, dragging him out of the party, “ah, before I forget, hand me your phone so you won’t pull anymore of this dumb stunts of yours.”

“Yeah… that’s not gonna happen,” Jungkook answers and your head immediately whips to glare at him, “don’t think it’s something personal, it’s just I may have thrown it into space after hanging up on you.”

“You’re kidding, right?” Jungkook shakes his head no “What the hell were you thinking you big–”

You sigh loudly, “you know what? Forget it. Let’s just leave and pray no crazy person finds it and won’t get to use it because it’s beyond repair.”

Jungkook allows you to finally drag him all the way to the exit. His hyungs and friends are all talking and dancing, but none of them sees him, or you.

On the elevator, you’re both quiet and you still hold his wrist, like he’s a small child. You even open the door for him once you’re both next to your car and Jungkook still says nothing, hurrying to put his seatbelt on.

“So, are you finally telling me what was all of that about?” You say just as the building you were both in is out of sight.

“I still wanna be your favorite boy. And I think you should drop that hyung.”

You turn to look at him briefly before turning your gaze back to the road, “Jungkook, I just don’t get what you’re talking about. You’re special to me, you’re important in my life.”

“No, Y/N, I wanna be the one that makes your day, the one you daydream about, the reason behind your pretty smile.”

“Jungkook…” you speed a little, without even sparing him a glance, and he aches inside.

“No, no. I’m dying to be your number one, I mean it. I can’t stop thinking of this world where you’re my biggest fan and I’m yours; where just like there’s no one better than you in my eyes, you feel the same.”

He’s not surprised when you stay quiet. In fact, you say nothing at all in the next six minutes you spend driving back to your place. Note that it was six minutes because of the speed you were driving at, which was a risk to his physical integrity, as well as yours. 

“We’re home. Take your shoes off when you walk in and go take a shower, I’ll make some coffee for us.”

Jungkook sighs, simply following your order. Why won’t you listen to him? Are you in some sort of denial phase, or maybe you’re really just that oblivious? This is too much for his fuzzy, drunk brain.

Jungkook shrugs off his denim jacket, dropping it somewhere on the way to your bathroom. And once he’s in there, he turns the shower on, not worried with the temperature he might get. 

“Jungkook, you didn’t close the do– what’s wrong with you?!” you yell, maybe in horror, or maybe in frustration, “Why would you get in the shower with your clothes on?!”

“I want to break your heart Y/N, and make you cry in the same way you make me cry.”

Your bathroom has a sliding glass door, and Jungkook’s forehead is leaning against it, letting the water soak his clothes and make him feel heavy. Your face relaxes, but you still look at him with confusion tinting you, the same way you have been looking at him for the past few months. “God fucking damn, I can’t think straight anymore and it’s all because of you Choi Y/N. I can’t think of anything or anyone who isn’t you.”

“Jungkook?”

“Please, Y/N. Stop asking me to speak with clarity, I can’t get any clearer than this–” he speaks again, knocking softly on your glass door “ –when I tell you I want to be your favorite one, that I want you to look at me the same way I look at you. Okay, Y/N? I don’t know what that pretty head of yours is deducting but I want you to understand I’m telling you I want to be the only one for you.”

You only stare at him, in absolute silence. The only noises come from the water that’s falling on him and your kettle in the kitchen.

Jungkook opens the door and does something he will probably regret for the rest of his miserable life, but also something his mind has been begging for so badly, he’s dreamt of it.

He can’t be bothered with turning the shower off, when he reaches for your wrist and pulls you closer to him. He presses his right hand against your cheek and his lips against yours. You gasp and he takes advantage of it by pulling you even closer.

He starts to move his lips and Jungkook swears he ascends to heaven when you kiss him back. The kiss might not even be intense like one of those you might see in American TV, but he feels his knees weak and warmth all over his body.

Your arms go to his shoulders and when your hands go for his hair, Jungkook could swear magic’s real and it’s produced by your lips, because he just likes you so much and it drives him crazy how he feels, he could laugh, and cry, scream and sing. All at the same time, just because of you.

He parts from your hold sooner than he’d like, but then again, kissing you for the rest of eternity might come a little too short for Jungkook. He rests his forehead against yours, and your hands go from his nape to his shoulders, and from his shoulders to his forearms. Both of you breathe agitatedly and Jungkook can hear his heartbeat so loud it must be bluetooth paired to a speaker, or maybe five.

“Let me be the only guy for you” he kisses you again, softly, barely the ghost of a touch, “I might just be the one.

🌿 reblogs are greatly appreciated!!

[lanarist]

NSFW 18+ Plug! Dabi x Fem! Reader HC

a/n: first off, minors DNI. Second, this is my first time posting any of my writing on any platform. I have so much shit on Wattpad that just sits in the drafts. I am not confident enough to publish my shit writing. I’m shocked that i am even doing this. But I thought about this while breaking up 🍃🍃 for a blunt. I’ve seen so many hcs/Drabbles of stoner Dabi. ....but what about plug dabi

Also I want to mention that I do not condone drug use unless for medical reasons. it helps me with my extreme anxiety. literally saved me. And I 100% do not condone drug dealing. Just wanna throw that out there before you read.

a/n: this shit is SOOO long I’m sorry. I worked on this for like three days.

Summary: literally brain rot. Dabi being your plug HC.

Warnings: drug use, intercourse, dumbafication, oral (f receiving), sexual themes, mentions of alcohol.

I feel like you would probably meet him at some house party. Full of people drunk and/or high off of drugs that were given at the party, the supplier being Dabi for said drugs.

He immediately noticed you when you joined the circle of people passing blunts around, thinking you definitely did not belong here. You looked so innocent with those unsure doe like eyes when a random guy passes the blunt to you.

Gravely mistaken when he watches you puff that blunt like a champ, not coughing up a lung once and throwing back alcohol like it was water. Good girl on the outside but bad girl on the inside? Holy fuck he thought you were hot. He’s gotta get to know you.

After the smoke sesh, he would pull you aside to introduce himself just to get close to you.

Would definitely give you his number saying, “if you ever need anything, hit me up. I got whatever ya need, doll.”

Anytime you text him needing something, he would get so excited. He would drop whatever he’s doing. It don’t matter if he’s in the middle of a sell, dead asleep, at his part time job extra cash, or early in the morning. He’s gonna give you what you’re asking of him asap.

Definitely giving you discounts even on his best shit. Original price for 10 grams is $100? He’s giving it to you for $50.

Also would throw in extra without your knowledge. One time you noticed he gave you three extra grams and tried to give it back to him. “‘S okay. Just keep it, doll.”

Plug dabi would definitely get jealous if you bought anything from anyone else besides him. He will make sure to give you shit for that.

If he doesn’t have what you need at that moment. Baby, he’s going to make sure he gets it by any means necessary if it means he gets to see you for a few minutes.

Will always bring the drugs to you wherever you’re at. No matter how many times you’ve told him you’ll meet him somewhere or come to his place. He doesn’t wanna inconvenience you.

He would always look for you at parties. Once found, he’s dragging you away from everybody to a vacant room, outside, or to his car. He wants to smoke with you alone.

Loves when the smoke rolls smoothly out of your mouth after you inhale it. Thinks you look god damn sexy with the smoke floating around you and your low red eyes look fucking adorable.

If there’s something new you wanna try lsd or shrooms etc, he’ll offer to be with you and to stay sober incase you have a bad trip.

He knows he’s completely infatuated with you, but will not admit it to his friends. Especially Keigo. “You’re fucking whipped.” “Shut the fuck up, Keigo.”

Absolutely hates it when some random dude hits on you at parties or even stands close to you. He’s pulling you away to smoke.

Finally gets the balls to text you one night to smoke with him. “I got some good shit this time, doll. Wanna smoke it with me?”

When he gets to your house, he’ll already have the blunts rolled, a pipe, or anything you want ready for you.

Will hold the blunt to your lips when it gets too small. gets a boner feeling how soft they feel. He doesn’t want you to burn your pretty fingers.

Loves that you match his energy when it comes to smoking. No one has been able to smoke as much as he does like you do.

When he starts to notice the looks you’re giving him, the way your eyelashes bat at him and the lustful look in your eyes. He decides he can’t hold back anymore.

He’ll grab your chin with his thumb and forefinger to face him, softly blowing smoke onto to your lips as he stares at you. Will roughly pull you in closer to smash his lips against yours after the smoke disappears.

Gently pushes you to lay back on your bed so he can hover over you and rest himself between your legs.

No high from any drug could compare to the soft whimpers and moans leaving your lips when he pushes his hips into yours. It was fucking music to his ears.

Absolutely snaps when you tug on his white hair. He’s tearing yours and his clothes off now.

And don’t you dare try to cover that beautiful body of yours. “Don’t hide from me now, baby.”

He’ll start leaving marks on your neck, then down to your breast, taking extra time sucking, licking, biting, and kissing on them.

When he gets down lower on your body, he’s happy to set that you’re already soaking, showing that you wanted this as much as him. He’ll wrap his arms around your thighs, setting them over his shoulders and will go to fucking work on your pussy.

Swears that he could’ve came on the spot from the moans and whimpers leaving your lips. Especially the moan that you let out when he added two of his fingers into the mix.

Will make it a point to constantly praise you while his tongue makes you feel like you’re higher than cloud 9. “You taste so fucking good.” “God, so fucking beautiful.”

Will stop right before you cum. “Nah, baby. I want you cummin on my cock.”

After he’s got you all ready for him, baby you are in for it. He’s waited so long for this fucking moment. He ain’t holding back. He’ll grab your throat tightly as he seethes himself into you. You both gasp at the feeling of pure ecstasy.

Loves your fucked out face. Tongue lolled out. Tears brimming your eyes. Little bit of drool dripping of the corner of your mouth. Hair a complete fucking mess from the many times he’s pulled on it.

His stroke game? GODLY. He’s thrusting into you like a god damn rabbit but he’s hitting all of the right places and it feels so fucking good.

100% rough but his words are the opposite. “You’re taking my cock so well, doll.” “Look so beautiful while I’m fucking ya dumb.” has a degradation kink but that’s for another time.

Aftercare with Dabi is pure heaven. He’ll hand you his shirt from off of the ground for you to wear. He’ll clean you up, light up a blunt for you two, and cuddle you until you both fall asleep.

Oh and, you definitely getting shit for free for now on.

Tags: @bakugosbratx

[charcubed]

hey char, mind to share your fave stevebucky headcanons? 👀

Oh I LOVE that you asked me this :’)  Thank you!

I honestly have so many if I really think about it because I love them so much and I think about their dynamic so much that I have so many favorite things... but here is what I think of off the top of my head:

• Steve was color blind before the serum, according to canon. I have a headcanon that Bucky used to try to describe colors to him. I wrote a mini fic about that here.

• Bucky was drafted for the war, but didn’t tell Steve. Steve sort of assumed that Bucky enlisted, and Bucky never wanted to correct him. How could he? Steve wanted to enlist so badly, and Bucky didn’t ever feel like he could admit that he didn’t have the same drive to want to ~fight for the country~ like Steve did. He didn’t want to disappoint him and he was afraid Steve would think he was a coward. So Bucky just... never told him that he was forced into war. It was never his choice to fight for the country. If it was up to him, they would’ve stayed home together and stayed safe and never fought at all.

• They were always physically rough with each other, in the sense that they'd wrestle as boys all the time, and Steve loved that Bucky never treated him as fragile. Buck knew he could take it. Even after the serum, they'd still scuffle a bit like kids, finding a bright spot in a war-torn world. They’d be awake in the trenches on lookout, having soft conversations in the night, and shoving each other after one says something stupid or makes a bad joke.

• Steve is bi, and Bucky is gay. Bucky was consciously aware of his feelings for Steve way, way before Steve was aware of his for Bucky. In the 30s, Bucky has a bit of a reputation for ~dating around,~ but not in a rude ladies’ man kind of way but rather his reputation is “Bucky Barnes is a real charmer. He’ll show you a good time and he’s really sweet, but he never pushes your boundaries.” Some women wishes he’d push their boundaries, but he doesn’t. He’s taken so many women out on dates because he never lets it get super serious, since they’re not who he wants and it’s mostly for appearances’ sake, especially since he and Steve live together. He definitely enjoys hanging out with women, and treating them nice, but most of the time his motivation is to try to set up double dates–half because Steve deserves to find a great girl to date, and half because a double date means Bucky can selfishly do a date activity “with” Steve and not have it mean anything. Meanwhile though, Steve gets jealous as hell and testy about Bucky dating all the time, but he’s oblivious to the fact that it’s because Steve wishes Bucky would be with him instead.

• Their first kiss was when Steve was 16 and Bucky was 17. I’m not necessarily saying that’s when they actually got together, but something significant happened between them at those ages... maybe they kissed because they were drunk, or it was so Steve’s “first kiss” would be someone he knew and it was for “practice.” And then they both never talked about it again, because they’re idiots and were afraid to ~ruin things~ between each other. That’s why Steve says “Rumlow said ‘Bucky’ and all of a sudden I was a 16-year-old kid again, in Brooklyn.” That’s why “seventeen” is one of Bucky’s trigger words as the Winter Soldier. It checks out, because Bucky is a little bit older than Steve.

• Steve doesn’t fully admit the depth of his own feelings for Bucky to himself until he finds out Bucky’s been captured by HYDRA. And then he tears Europe apart to get him back. He’d have done that anyway, obviously, but... the prospect of losing Bucky forever is really what makes him realize how much he can’t handle that concept. Because he’s in love with him.

• After Bucky “dies,” Steve gets more reckless, and that’s part of the reason he put the plane in the ice and didn’t try to survive: he didn’t want to live in a world without Bucky in it. This is supported by canon. And so I headcanon that, after Steve finds out about the Winter Soldier, one day he abruptly realizes that he could’ve died in that plane crash and never known Bucky was alive and brainwashed and suffering. He thought Bucky was dead and he wanted to follow him, and he could’ve left Bucky even more alone in the world without knowing it. When Steve realizes how close he came to leaving Bucky behind like that, he throws up. It horrifies him to think about it.

• They each have a pair of dog tags where one says “Steve Rogers” and one says “Bucky Barnes.” They swapped one tag each, so that they’d have a matching set, because while they couldn’t list each other as “next of kin,” they wanted tangible evidence that would show other people how important they are to each other. So people would know: tell him if something happens to me.

• Their Brooklyn accents come out / get heavier around each other, especially if they’re bitching about things or arguing.

• Bucky is a complete sci-fi and fantasy nerd–which is now confirmed canon, and I love it. In particular, I like to headcanon that he loves to read paperback sci-fi novels, and discount romance novels. He unironically enjoys them, and he leaves them allllll over the place. One of the things they love to do is Bucky will sit around and read while Steve will sit around and draw/paint, and half the time Steve gets distracted sketching Bucky’s facial expression he makes while he’s reading.

• Bucky is also a pop culture gremlin. He will try and often get interested in pretty much anything and everything, without rhyme or reason. In modern day, he and Nat will watch trashy reality TV together–sometimes to make fun of it, sometimes to get invested. Steve thinks they’re insane for that. And sometimes Bucky will like one niche thing but then for very specific reasons he dislikes another similar thing. It makes sense to him, even if Steve doesn’t get it.

• Steve tends to be pickier with the kind of stuff he enjoys. He’s always had Strong Opinions™️ on everything, including and especially art. Put him in a museum and he’ll have a lot of thoughts on all of it. He doesn’t judge things or hate on other people for liking things he doesn’t like at all, but he won’t get hooked on a movie/show quite as easily. The one exception is animation, which he absolutely adores, and he goes on a wild binge of all kinds of animated content for awhile–shows and movies–because the various art styles and uses of the medium to tell crazy stories just fascinates him.

• Easy access to so much music is one of their mutual favorite things about the 21st century. Bucky often gets into individual artists’ entire discographies and becomes a fan, whereas Steve often gets into a handful of specific songs from a wide range of various people. Like... Bucky will often love an entire album, and Steve will often love 2 songs specifically more than others. But even with that, Steve loves collecting vinyl records–both old and new ones.

• Bucky has a fantastic singing voice even though he’s shy about it, and he tends to hum along to music when distracted or working on something else–especially while making something in the kitchen. 

• Bucky likes technology more than Steve; Steve likes physical stuff more than Bucky. Bucky loves to take photos and videos of things all the time, hoarding digital memories in a way that’s precious to him, knowing that they’re “safe” and accessible anywhere. They lost so much of the objects that they loved a century ago, and photos were scarce, but now... there are endless ways to have pictures. When Bucky was recovering in Wakanda and Steve was on the run, Bucky would often text Steve photos–sometimes without captions–to wordlessly share bits of his days with him. He’s got a good eye for photography, except for when he takes the photo equivalent of shitposts to make Steve laugh. Regardless, Steve gets his favorites printed–some of Bucky’s photos, some of his, some of their selfies–so they also always have something tangible to hold onto.

• Bucky calls Steve “sweetheart” sometimes, just to be a little shit–and he means it. It makes Steve turn red every time, without fail, but he secretly doesn’t mind it.

Okay I’ll stop hahaha. Those are the main ones that come to mind for me all the time when I think of them! 

Thank you again for asking :D  This was so fun to write all in one place!

[trippin-over-my-fandoms]

How's your day been our wonderful cult leader. I must say your newest fic is amazing and I hope I'm not being a pain by asking for some steamy spacegravity headcanons if that's ok with you

Aw thank you so much! That’s probably a tad more than i deserve since I was just looking at it to show my sister and caught two very bad mistakes. Ben who i only know Be. Anyway!

I do actually have in mind a steamy fic I want to write as well as slot a scene into the 60s au and just do a separate one. I dunno yet. I’m always super confident thinking about writing smut but getting into actually writing it I’m like “oh my gosh why did I think I could do this” (spoiler alert- I take everything I do, including smut, too seriously) so stay tuned! A true fic will happen! For now? Headcanons!!!

18+ content ahead!

Their first time would be literally so clumsy and awkward. Which would be the Higher Love scene since it’s very obvious in episode 3 they hooked up after that adorable kiss.

Let me explain-

Luther has never had a real relationship and he’s canonically stated he’s never had friends and never left the house. And it is canon that the rave girl was his first time. He was drunk and all sorts of stuff when that happened so it’s like- how much does he remember? How much of that did the lady take the lead on? Ya know?

I mean, he’s definitely seen porn but probably not a lot of it. He gets how sex works in theory but actually doing it is a lot different but he’s got 30 years of being touch and loved starved to push him through.

Sloane is in the same boat I think. She’s never left the house either and is as bond to the Sparrows as Luther was to the Umbrellas.

He may not be a thirty year old virgin but she definitely is (well… 29)

But she’s not wholly innocent. Something tells me this girl is a reader. Film and literature are the way to go for escapism (speaking as a professional lol) so she’s definitely read some books with sex scenes and she’s definitely read books who’s whole thing is sex. Even if they’re trashy she’s probably read some and she’d die if any of her siblings ever found out.

So their first time would be figuring the specifics out but they get it pretty quick. Quick enough to do it on the ceiling.

Now obviously they have sex in her bed too since Fei mentions Sloane’s bed squeaks.

But that scene- the LOOK Fei gives Luther after she says “kept me up all night” drives me fucking insane like they are doing SOMETHING

He’s gotta be pretty impressive or something. Like these two hook up a lot.

His dirty talk could be pretty good.

Nah- headcanon it is good. Like, he may be clumsy pretty normally but Luther’s sexy talk is out of this world (pun intended). He somehow knows exactly what to say and how to say it- like a low and sensual voice. You’d never believe he was the same guy.

I’m also on team “Luther has a big dick” and I think once he gets the hang of things he knows how to use it. Also? Hot take/headcanon part of Luther’s super power is endurance/stamina 👀

Luther may not have gotten adventurous with his porn search history but Sloane has read some wild books so this girl has a check list of things she wants to try. It was definitely her idea to do it on the ceiling. Between her powers and her imagination-

They may not be super kinky but I think they definitely have some kinkier moments. They may not go full 50 Shades (a book Sloane def read) but what couple doesn’t want to try being tied up?

Though- it probably becomes a game. Starting with Sloane being the one tied up and having to use her sparrow skills to get out of it before she finishes and if she can do that she edges/teases him for a bit or something.

Luther can’t play that game. It would have to be some super thick rope or something because he can just super strength his way out.

This has been sitting in my drafts too long I’m gonna go ahead and post it rip

[awanderingdeal]

I vote leo meeting the harvard team! 💕

So this fic has been a bit of a mare to write, but we are here!

You can read the first part of this here

Rating: T

CW: Alcohol, academic superiority complex and coming out.

Logan, Finn, Leo, Percy, Will and the general Sweater Weather universe belongs to @lumosinlove. The other team members were made up by me for this fic.

“Okay, tell me their names again,” Leo said, tugging at the rolled neck of his sweater as he shut the car door.

“Nutty,” Finn laughed. “There’s not going to be a pop quiz. We’ll introduce you when we meet people.”

Leo scowled, letting Logan thread their fingers together. It was weird being able to do this in public still and Leo couldn’t help but glance around. “I just don’t want to make a fool of myself.” Logan squeezed his hand reassuringly, meeting Leo’s gaze with a soft smile.

“Nobody expects you to know anything. And everybody’s great.” Logan wrinkled his nose like he’d just smelt something bad. “Except Wesley, he’s an ass, but I’ll point him out.”

Like many of the others in Harvard square, the building was all exposed brick and white accents, blending in seamlessly with those around it. Inside was different, more modern. Leo didn’t get to see much of the first floor, the one dedicated to the restaurant Finn, Logan and the rest of the team had dined at previous evening, before he was ushered up a grand staircase, but he’d seen the photographs. The cherry blossom ceilings and walls of glass provided the perfect backdrop for the instagram feeds of the hoards of celebrities and influencers that flocked there. Hence his surprise when, after checking their invitations again, an employee pushed open a set of double doors to reveal a room that more resembled a 1920’s speakeasy than anything 21st century. A loud cheer went up as they crossed the threshold.

“Is this a team thing?” Leo mouthed at Logan.

He got his answer from Percy Marshall. Leo had met him a few times before when they’d played the Rangers. “You’re the last to arrive,” Percy chuckled. “I’d say I was surprised, but that would be a lie.” He slapped a hand playfully against Finn’s bicep. Is this outfit change number 52, Finn? Don’t worry, you didn’t disappoint. You look wonderful.”

“Fuck you, Marshy,” Finn laughed. “Tremz was on a call to his sisters actually.”

“Oh, I do apologise,” Percy clasped his hand to his chest. “We wouldn’t dare break up a Tremblay soiree.”

“You’re an ass,” Logan scoffed, plucking at Finn’s slacks. “I was only talking to them because Finn was taking so long. Did you know there are several shades of mustard and only one of them goes with this shirt?”

“Oh look, they argue like an old married couple too,” William Morgan, another of those Leo knew, and Percy’s teammate on the Rangers, teased. “Marshy, these hands are looking too empty. Get these men a drink.”

“Aye, aye, capt’n.” Leo set to follow as Percy led the way to the bar, stumbling slightly as he found Will’s firm grasp on his shoulder stopping his movement. Logan turned as his fingers slipped from his hand.

“Go ahead, Tremzy. I’m going to introduce Leo to some of the team. We want all the gossip without you two around to censor him.”

Logan frowned. “I’m not sure -”

“Relax, Logan. This isn’t a hazing. We’ll be right over there,” Will pointed towards a group perched on stools around two of the tables in the centre of the room, a mix of the old team and what Leo assumed were their partners. “Knut’s a big boy. He can object for himself if he really doesn’t want to come.”

“I’m sure I can hold my own,” Leo cocked his head slightly and smiled. “You better not leave Harzy with Percy for too long. They’ll be three shots down by now.”

The next few hours passed in a whirlwind of introductions. Leo had lost count of the number of hands he'd shaken and the new names he'd learned. It reminded him of those first few days in Gryffindor, being shuffled around from place to place and everybody telling him he'd get used to it.

The quiet of the bathroom was a welcome reprieve to the chaos. “Sweetheart,” Leo laughed, listening to Finn sing to himself in the stall. “Are you okay? You’ve been in there a while.”

“I’m coming, I’m coming.” A concerningly loud crash preceded the door being pushed open. “I’m here.”

“You’re drunk,” Leo chuckled.

Finn pulled his hands from under the stream of water, shaking droplets everywhere as he squeezed the tips of his thumb and forefinger together. “Maybe just the tiniest bit.”

Leo shook his head fondly. “Let’s go and find Lo.” Glancing back to check Finn was following him proved to be a mistake. “Shit, I’m sorry,” he apologised, rubbing at his forehead and stepping back from the wall of muscle he’d just crashed into. Of course, the tall man with his hair pulled back into a loose ponytail was the one person Leo hadn’t yet met.

“Leo, this is James. Call him Hunter,” Finn grinned with his hand resting in the small of Leo’s back. "Hunter, this is -"

"Leo Knut. I know. Everybody knows," Hunter said and Leo noted the familiar notes of his own accent in the words. He faltered with his hand thrust halfway in Leo's direction, letting it fall back by his side. "Oh fuck, sorry man. Did you want to introduce him as your boyfriend? Go ahead."

"It's cool, no worries." Finn shrugged, the rounds of his cheeks tinged with the slightest of blushes. "Aww, what the heck!" He squared his shoulders, standing a little taller, the corners of his mouth splitting with pride. "Hunter, this is Leo, my boyfriend."

Hunter extended his hand again for Leo to shake. “Nice to meet you. Please excuse me, I have to use the bathroom now, but we’ll talk later.”

***

"Boys." The call had come from behind them and Logan groaned low in his chest as they turned to acknowledge it.

"Wes! You made it," Finn smiled, the corners of his mouth tight. "We weren't sure you'd be able to. With all those big meetings you have to attend and such. Is your wife, Renee, wasn’t it, here? I'd love to meet her."

Something flickered in Wes' smug expression. "They stayed in California. Nate has a very busy schedule. Harvard is very important to me, as you know, so I came alone."

“Isn’t Nate three?” Logan blinked.

“You have to give them a good start if you want them to get them to get into a good college these days, I’m sure you understand. Where was it you went, Leo?"

Leo pursed his lips, letting the same calm wash over him that he channelled for interviews. “I didn’t go. I got drafted straight out of high school.”

“Oh, well, that’s a shame,” Wes said. “College isn’t for everybody though, is it?”

Logan bristled beside him, and Leo placed a placating hand on his shoulder. “Indeed,” he blinked. “I didn’t need my intelligence validated by a degree then, and I still don’t now. And I was hardly about to turn down an offer from The Gryffindor Lions now, was I?”

Wes grumbled something that sounded vaguely like an agreement before turning on his heel and walking off in a manner that Leo could only describe as petulant.

“You’re so hot,” Finn took Leo’s face between his hands and pressed a kiss to his lips. “I’m going to get a drink. Do you want another?”

“Please,” Leo nodded. Logan raised his still mostly full glass as a rejection of the offer.

“You should have let me punch him,” Logan huffed. “He would have deserved it.”

"And get blood on your shirt? Let’s leave that on the ice, shall we?” Leo tugged at the lapels of Logan’s jacket.

***

"So," Logan started as they claimed one of the low tables in the corner, a little tucked away from the rest of the room. "What do you think?"

"It's always nice seeing where you two started," Leo hummed, threading his fingers through the thin curls on the nape of Logan's neck. "I just don't know how you used to do this everyday. Live amongst all this energy. The guys all seem great, but it's a lot even now and I'm assuming you've all mellowed somewhat with age."

"I am not old," Logan scoffed. "Mais non, I agree. Wasn't always like this though. There's more than one graduating class here and we've been apart a long time. A lot of excitement."

"Sorry, sorry, I got caught up with Biscuit. He has triplets now, isn't that crazy?" Finn said, pressing a glass into Logan’s hand and setting Leo’s in front of him before flopping onto the couch opposite. "One Margarita for the fine sir."

"Thanks, Harzy," Leo laughed lightly.

"I can't believe him and Vanessa are still together," Logan hummed, taking a long sip of his drink. He leaned back, crossing his left leg over his right thigh and snaked his arm across the dark leather, brushing his fingers against Leo's shoulder. "I only introduced them because she was flirting with you at that party, the one just after we got back from winter break my junior year, and I wanted to distract her."

"Oh, so that's why you got all moody," Finn said. "She wasn't flirting, she needed help with an essay, idiot."

"The fact you remember Logan's mood on a night seven years ago says more about you than him," Leo snorted.

"First of all, Tremzy being grumpy? That's just a good guess. Second, some of us were still stupid at 20, Knutty." Finn sighed wistfully. "Hey, at least it doesn't feel like I'm being stabbed in the chest these days when I think about it. Progress, right?"

Logan tipped his glass in Finn's direction, nodding his head briefly. "I'll cheers to that."

"To -" Leo started, letting the toast die off as another of Finn and Logan's old team mates approached. He hoped the disappointment he felt wasn't written across his face; whilst he hadn't really expected to be left alone for too long, he had hoped for the brief respite to have lasted longer.

"Hey." The newcomer had his hand shoved into his pockets and his shoulders stooped, almost as if he was trying to hide himself. "I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

"Ken!" Finn patted the empty seat next to him. "Of course not. Come, sit."

Leo extended his arm, offering his hand. "Nice to meet you. Ken was it? I'm Leo."

"Ken's what the team always called me. Don't really hear it much these days." Leo thought he saw something sad in the smile sent his way. "My real name is Obi."

"That's because you went off the radar," Logan gave a pointed look.

"About that -" Obi swiped Finn's drink, ignoring his disgruntled protest. He drained what was left of it, pulling at an non-existent loose thread on his sweater. "I wanted to say thank you, you know. For having the guts to come out. I know Black and Lupin were first, but that was forced wasn’t it. You made a choice. I know that must have been hard. It was one hell of a ballsy move."

Leo looked between Finn and Logan, expecting them to answer, but neither of them spoke. "We didn't have much of a choice, not if we didn't want to be watching our back every second of every day."

"It was still brave," Obi muttered. "I couldn't have done it."

"Ken, what are you saying?" Logan never did have much patience for others taking their time to get to the point, even though he was a fan of the scenic route himself.

"They gave you a whole Harvard degree and you need to ask that question?" Obi huffed a laugh. "I'm gay. I met Marco, my now husband at the end of senior year, and freaked out. I didn't know how to make these two worlds work, so I didn't. I moved to DC with him, and started a new life. I'm an accountant, he works in marketing. We have four rats, and a Vizsla called Poppy. It's all very domestic. I love it, but I was a coward.”

"You're not a coward. You don't owe that information to anybody, Ken. Not the others, not the media, not the NHL and not us. Not now, not then, not ever.” Finn took a breath, holding up his finger to signal he wasn’t finished. “Besides, it's not as if Lo and I planned this. We went into this with every intention of stuffing this deep, deep into the depths of denial, never for anybody to find out. Including ourselves. And then Nutty came along.”

Obi smiled at Leo, turning his attention back to Finn. "When did you become Gay Yoda?"

"I spend way too much time in our psych's office. Just spreading the wisdom. Heather would be proud."

"Do the others know?" Logan asked.

"Not yet, I think I'd like them to though."

Logan shifted, leaning forward in his seat. "There's no rush, Ken. We've got your back, whatever you decide."

"So, do you have photos?" Leo cocked his head. "We got to show off. Now it's your turn. Even if it's only for us."

"Of Marco?"

"I'm sure he's wonderful, but I was actually talking about Poppy. And the rats," Leo teased.

There were moments when Leo wondered whether they had made the right decision. When he was playing in front of hostile crowds, or fending off stupid media questions, or blocking bigots on twitter. And then there were moments when he knew the decision they had made was 100% perfect. Right now, that was one of those moments.

[enigmawrappedinhypocrisy]

*Request* Okay. Thanks! Could the reader be in to wrestling and her and barley are best friends? And something happened and they find out they’re falling for each other? And Ian is always teasing the reader? And a kiss at the end? Sorry if it’s a bit confusing.. again thanks!

 Okay I’m not sure how to do this… and I’m not into wrestling… And i’m really bad at this getting things done thing… sooo… I’m sorry, I know this has been in my asks for 100 years. But excuses… And i’m tired of this being in my drafts sooo… However, Hopefully it's decent enough. 

Fandom: Onward

Pairings: Barley x Reader (mention of grandchildren once but nothing that indicates gender... I think...) 

Warnings: Bad writing, Quick Mention of drunk idiots harassing reader, I don’t know a thing about Wrestling, Fluff, very bouncy thoughts... a tiny little bit of almost angst. 

❀✦ Master List✦❀

You met Barley at a wrestling match when a few drunk idiots decided to hassle you. As they tend to do… 

You ran into the first, seemingly safe person you saw. You looked at him with puppy eyes and were grateful he understood your silent plea. 

Barley smiled warmly and put his arm around you. He pretended to be your boyfriend until the guys lost interest in you and left. He made some jokes to lighten the mood and struck up a casual conversation with you, as if you really did know each other. You found yourself amazed and feeling better, it seemed this elf boy radiated security and gentleness.  

Then, with a simple thank you, you’d parted ways; only to run into each other again at the local diner after the match. It was there you had sat and talked well into the early hours of the morning. 

You learned he was interested in many things you were, and you just felt… content around him. By the time you had to part, numbers were exchanged, and he’d texted you before noon that day. 

You began hanging out shortly after that. You were nearly always at each other’s house, and quickly became close with his family. His mother adored you and his brother felt comfortable enough to joke around with you. 

All in all you and Barley were quite close.

But not as close as your family's seemed to think you were… or maybe hope would be more appropriate…  

*

The weekend had finally arrived and you made your way to Barley’s house, as planned, after work.

There was a big wrestling event in the evening and you and Barley had plans to hang out and watch it together. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for you to spend a lot of time at the Lightfoot house so no one batted an eye when you showed up a little early. 

Ms. Lightfoot welcomed you and let you know that Barley had called saying he'd be a little late, and she was going out with friends. As she was leaving she turned to wink at you telling you, with a knowing look, to have fun. 

You thanked her as you felt your cheeks flush with warmth and made your way to the familiar living room. You didn't mind waiting for Barley, in fact, you'd be willing to wait all night if it meant spending time with him. Not that you would tell him that...

Lost in your thoughts about how dumb and sappy that sounded even in your mind, and the implications therein, you hadn't noticed Barley's brother come in.

You had spent a fair amount of time with both brothers since you’d first met Barley. So by this time Ian was pretty comfortable around you, sometimes even coming to you for help or advice. Especially when it entailed something he might have been too embarrassed about to ask his mother or brother about.  

 Ian had decided to take a break from homework, and get a snack when he found you lost in thought on his couch. When he came back from the kitchen only to find you with the same dazed expression several minutes later he decided to tease you a little. 

"Barley late for date night?" Ian asks, his tone even, leaning against the wall an apple in hand. 

"Yea- wait no! Why would you say that?" You blink taken off guard by the sudden question. 

Ian raises an eyebrow in a ‘really?’ expression. 

“Shut up” you try and fail to keep the blush from your voice. "We're just… eh… hanging out!" You defend a little too enthusiastically. 

“Interesting that’s the part you chose to respond to…” Ian chuckles, before heading back upstairs. If you weren't ready to admit your feelings, who was he to do it for you… besides, this was  far more amusing.

*

It wasn't much longer until Barley arrived home, a little disheveled. The match wasn't due to start for another hour, maybe more depending on how things went, and yet it looked like the elf boy had rushed home. 

Why? 

The only thought that continued to creep into your mind was you… he rushed home to see you. The idea of It warmed your heart, and filled you with a longing. A longing for a potential life where Barley was coming home after work each day to see you. 

He'd find you cooking… reading… working on some project… and kiss you. 

You'd ask him about his day… and he yours. 

You'd share a pleasant dinner and end the night cuddled on the couch… 

You’d be happy… 

Ian's words run on loop in your mind and you don’t notice the way Barley’s face lights up upon seeing you. 

Did Barley think you were dating? That this was a date? 

Did he want it to be? 

Did you? 

You hadn't noticed you were staring until Barley brought attention to it. 

"What?" You jump. 

"I asked why you were looking at me like that?" he gives you his charming little half smile as he repeats, what you assume was, his earlier question. 

"Oh, um… nothing… no reason" you blush and desperately avoid looking at him. 

Barley watches you for a moment, clearly not believing your answer, but gives in with a shrug. 

"I'm just gonna go put my stuff down and get something to drink… you want something?" He asks. 

"Okay, um… no thanks" you try to sound casual all the while you're incredibly aware of your quickening heartbeat. 

Barley nods before leaving you, calling to you from the kitchen. He asks about your day. You give a non answer in response and ask him about his. 

He goes on to tell you about some funny thing his boss said in response to an irate customer, and soon returns to the living room. He hands you your drink before flopping down next to you. 

You scold him as you nearly spill. Not really realizing he brought you something even though you told him you didn’t need him to… not only that, but it was definitely your favorite… why would he… how… 

"Sorry my love" he smirks, clearly not sorry. 

You roll your eyes giving him a little shove in response to the nickname. He often called you sweet things. Things you previously attributed to his personality or teasing but now they had you wondering.

When he called you those things, sweetheart, darling, dear… was he actually hinting at what he really felt? 

You look at him out of the corner of your eye and quickly squeak noticing he was watching you with an indescribable emotion.

"W-what?" You try to act casual. 

"What's wrong with you?" He asks, blunt and to the point. 

"What do you mean?" You try and play it off, as if your mind wasn’t playing that little game with the levers and ball… and see you can’t even remember what it’s called… and it’s your analogy… 

PINBALL! Your brain was playing pinball… the dinging buzzing things the ball hits against being the sudden and many thoughts… which makes you the ball? Or was the ball the thoughts… bouncing around… there goes the analogy again…  

"You're being all quiet and…” he indicates you vaguely,  “did my mom say something to you? She's been teasing me about grandchildren lately, she didn't say something like that too you did she?" 

Your eyes widen and you suspect Barley didn't mean to let that slip out by the blush now coloring his ears. 

"No… but um… what-what do you tell her when she asks about that kind of stuff?" Yeah super subtle… 

Barley scratches the back of his neck, “I tell her we haven't discussed that…" 

Wait…

"Why would we… Um Barley?" You push away your insecurities, fear that you’d read the situation wrong, and decide to just jump in with both feet. 

Or tip over the machine? Does it work now? The analogy? 

He 'hmms'. 

"Do you think we're dating?" You try to phrase it gently but cringe when you hear yourself. You don’t want to come across rude, like you’re making fun of him… but also don’t wanna let on how much you’re starting to suspect you want him to say yes… 

Barley looks away from you, practically purple at this point. 

"Uh… no of course not…" It sounded small, nervous but... hopeful? 

"Do… do you want to?" you manage to force out, slightly proud of your mostly even tone.

Do you?

You’re still not sure at this point yourself, you’d only just realized the way you feel about the elf boy that was your best friend. Did you want to risk that? What happens if this was just a little puppy attraction, lust thing… and whatever relationship you begin quickly sizzles out? 

Barley is looking at his hands as he nervously fiddles with the zipper of his vest. He bites his lip and tries to avoid your gaze. 

Oh… 

You soften, “It’s okay if you do… I mean… wanna… um…” Now you can’t find the words, which becomes more difficult when Barley looks up at you, hope shining in his eyes. 

“What are you saying?” he prompts, heart pounding in his chest. He hopes you can’t hear it. 

You shift, turning towards him slightly. “Well… if you wanted to maybe go on a date or something…” 

“Yes?” 

“I’d probably be okay with that… I mean… if you want to” you add the last part, now desperately hoping this wasn’t some awful joke. 

Barley smiles, reaching forward to brush a piece of hair from your face. “Do you wanna go on a date with me?” He asks softly, apparently having gained some confidence back. 

You nod, leaning into his touch before you realize you’re doing it. 

“Tomorrow night?” he suggests. 

Again, you nod, not trusting your voice. 

Barley smiles, his attention turning back to the tv. The match was starting soon, the announcers already talking about what they expect to happen. He leans back, his arm resting behind you on the top of the couch. Not an uncommon thing for the elf boy. What was uncommon, however, was you relaxing against his side and how right it felt.

Without a word, perhaps because he wasn’t sure he could trust his voice either, Barley brings his arm down around you, holding you against him. 

If you had the courage yourself to look up at him, you would have seen the flushing upon his cheeks. But either way this was comfortable and you weren’t in a hurry to end it any time soon. 

*

A few hours later Barley's mom returns home. Maaaybe a little drunk which results in her cooing loudly when she finds you and Barley asleep and cuddling on the couch. 

This, and her half stumbling up the stairs, manages to rouse you and Barley from your comfortable nap.

Barley yawns, and slowly gets to his feet. 

"Come on, I'll drive you home" he offers another yawn soon follows.

"Don't worry, I can drive myself" you stretch, not really pleased with the idea of making the trip home yourself.

"You're too tired- not safe" Barley half murmurs. 

"You're too tired" you retort. 

"You should stay here… on the couch… or I can take the couch" he stumbles over his words. 

You nod in agreement flopping back on the couch. When Barley doesn't leave you raise a brow in question. 

"I was just thinking…" he shuffles from one foot to the other.

You watch him with patient eyes, now a little more alert. You'd let him say what he needed, when he needed not wanting to rush him. 

"I mean… if I don't drive you home I can't kiss you goodbye…" 

His ears were a dark maroon by now and you can't keep the smile from your eyes. His sweetness, his bashfulness, just how God damn cute he was. And most of all… how much you wanted to kiss his pink tinted face. 

So you did. 

You stood, quicker than he could react, grabbed his face on either side, and brought his lips to yours. After a moment of shock Barley’s arms come around you, keeping you too him. 

You can't say for sure if the head rush you felt was from the kiss or standing too suddenly, but you chose to think it was the kiss as you give him several more little pecks before eventually breaking apart with a yawn. 

"Better?" You ask, your head falling forward to lean against his shoulder. 

Barley nods before pulling back, calling a good night to you, and hurrying to his room. 

You chuckle softly before flopping once again on the couch… there'd be time tomorrow to deal with all this… but for now… sleep was calling and the old couch was far too inviting… 

*And that’s all folks*

[idy-ll-ique]

Didn’t Know Where Else To Go.

Pairing: Mob Boss!Sebastian Stan x F!Reader

Genre: Fluff and Angst

Warnings: violence, assault, death, mentions of smut at the end and curse words

Requested: Nope

The hero shows up at the villain’s doorstep one night. They’re shivering, bleeding, scared. There’s also a slightly dazed look in their eyes- they were drugged. They look like they were assaulted. Looking up at the villain, swaying slightly as they’re close to passing out, they mumble “...didn’t know where else to go...” then collapse into the villain’s arms.

Summary: Sebastian Stan: a mobster boss. Everyone in the city hated him. When he meets Y/N, a new bartender at his favourite bar, she makes it clear that she also doesn’t like him. What changes?

Author’s Note: Hey peeps! The aforementioned prompt is something I read on Tumblr and really liked it. So I decided to write a fic loosely based on it. I hope you guys enjoy this! (This has been in my drafts for a long time, I’m currently working on 2 requested fics)

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Sebastian POV:

"Boss, there is someone at the door."

"Send them in," I commanded, looking up from my book. The person who walked in with him was… instantly recognizable. My jaw dropped— she had been crying. Her pupils were dilated, she was taking short, fast breaths and her voice was frail. "What are you doing here?"

"Didn't know where else to go."

With that, she did the most YA-Novel-Female-Protagonist thing she could do— faint.

It all began 7 months ago. The person who was at the door was Y/N Y/L/N, a bartender at one of my favourite bars ever in the city. The thing is, when we first met, she hated me. Let me take you back 7 months.

Flashback:

I entered the bar, smirking when everyone turned to look at me. They looked away just as quickly, their voices becoming hushed. I looked around, stopping when I saw the bartender. Whoa, this was someone new and damn was she cute. Smiling, I walked over and sat down in front of her.

"Hey, was— oh. What will you like, sir?" I rolled my eyes at her. "Come on, why does everyone do the same thing? What is it about me?" I joked, winking. "Um, the fact that you're a fucking mobster and have been terrorizing the city for the past few years and would kill anyone if they question you? Uh, I don't know, actually," she snapped.

I froze. The woman seemed to really hate me. Here I was, thinking if I buttered her up enough she'd come home with me. I told her my order and looked away from her. "So, why here?" she asked me as she prepared my drink. "I really like this place, I've been here before loads of times. I don't plan to stop," I shrugged.

"Ugh, just my luck," she mumbled under her breath, rolling her eyes in disgust. "Look, you don't have to be fucking rude, okay?" I retorted. "Oh yeah? What are you gonna do? Shoot me? That's what you like to do, right? Kill people. Innocent people, let me be precise. No wonder everyone in the city except your goons hate you."

With that, she slammed my glass on the counter and stormed away from me, going to serve another customer. I was left staring at the glass, my figure shaking with repressed anger. She knew damn well I never laid hands on innocent people. No one in the city hated me.

Or did they?

The shaking stopped. What if she was right? I mean, she was much closer to the civilians than I was, what if they all hated me? "Uh, excuse me," I called out, hating how my voice cracked slightly. She glanced at me. "What do you want?"

"Answers."

"Ask the questions first," she huffed. "Does… does everyone really not like me?" I asked her. She stopped cleaning the glass, set it down and looked straight at me. "Yes. They don't like you. You're a mobster boss, dude! Have you seen films with mobster bosses? All of them, evil as hell. See how everyone in the bar became quiet when you came in?"

She had a point. "You know I would never lay a hand on innocent people," I defended myself, glaring at her. "Look, I'm sorry but we can never be too careful. What if you snap one day? What if you go rogue? Everyone lives in fear. They're afraid of you. And it's not like I can change everyone's mindset all at once."

"I guess you're right," I muttered, downing my drink in one go. "Hey, Mr Stan?" I looked up. "Y/N Y/L/N. I shouldn't have snapped at you," she apologized quietly, holding her hand out. "Doing this to get onto my good side?" I teased and she laughed.

"Come on, man! Doing this to show people you're not all you seem to be." I took her hand and shook it. "It's very nice to meet you, Y/N." She nodded and went back to cleaning the glasses. "Can I get one more drink?"

"I hope you didn't drive here." 

"I came on foot, actually. My house is just down the block." She gasped, startling me. "Mr Stan, giving your address away to strangers? How irresponsible of you!" I couldn't help but laugh. "I guess I trust you to not do anything bad." I spent another 2 hours there, chatting with Y/N.

She was a really fun person to be around. She had completed her education but was searching for jobs. In the meanwhile, she had decided to work here. 

By the time I was done drinking, I was too tipsy to even walk. "K, I'm goin'," I slurred, standing up. "Mr Stan, don't— oof," Y/N hissed as I fell off the chair in my intoxicated state. She rushed around the bar and helped me stand, wrapping her arms around my waist. "You can't walk in this state."

"I need to go home," I whined. "As it turns out, you've stayed long enough and now it's closing time. Let me get my coat." She dumped me on the chair and went to fetch her coat. I admired her from afar. 

She wore a mini-skirt that was flirtatiously snug around her thick thighs and a tank top. When she wore the coat, it extended past the skirt. Her hair was pulled into a messy bun and she was looking very sexy in the dim light. "Damn," I whispered under my breath, smirking.

When she returned, she helped me stand. I draped an arm around her shoulder and we stepped out of the bar. "Okay, which direction?" I pointed to the right and we proceeded to walk. "Have you ever gotten this drunk before? Because it's obvious you can't handle booze."

"Not really, I usually have to stay sober for my job. We need real intellectuals in the mob biz, you can't have drunk idiots running a mob," I laughed, finding it hard to keep myself upright. Shouldn't have drank so much…

"Right now, sir, you are a drunk idiot," Y/N sighed, rolling her eyes. "Thank you, I will take that as a compliment. Plus, you can just call me Sebastian, it's okay." She shook her head and silence fell between us. "Tell me when we're there," she spoke quietly as I felt a headache coming.

"Being drunk sucks," I pouted, "I'm not even having a good time! It hurts everywhere—" "Probably because you fell off the chair." "—and my head hurts! I don't understand why people like to be so drunk." She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"You are seriously reminding me of my ex-boyfriend. He couldn't handle drinks either and I always had to babysit him when he got back home drunk," she muttered. "You can babysit me anytime!" I said cheerfully. "You're drunk, Sebastian, stop flirting with me."

"But you're so cute."

"Thank you, that is very kind of you."

"And se— we're here! That's my house!" She stopped in front of my house and rang the bell. "Is anyone at home or do I have to tuck you in?" she joked. "Nah, my best buddies and right-hand-men live with me. One's name is Chris—" Just at that moment, Chris opened the door.

"Wha— Sebastian? Are you drunk?"

"Sorry sir, I didn't know he couldn't handle drinks. I'm Y/N Y/L/N, the new bartender at Red Tavern." With that, she passed me to Chris. "Thank you for bringing him home, Ms Y/L/N. It's not your fault he got intoxicated, he should've known when to stop. He didn't cause trouble, did he?"

"Oh no, of course not, sir. He's fun to be around," she commented, gesturing towards me. I grinned. "Please, he's really not, you don't have to lie. Anyway, thank you so much again! Do you want a lift home? I can ask Anthony to drive you home." 

"That would be great, thanks. My house is in the opposite direction, it's a bit far…"

"Absolutely no problem. Anthony!" 

A few minutes later, my other friend, Anthony Mackie came downstairs, rubbing his eyes. "Yeah— oh, Sebastian is— damn." He tried to hold his laughter in. "Yeah. While I get him to his room, do you mind dropping her home? That's Y/N, she brought him home." Y/N waved at him.

"Of course, I don't mind. Thanks, Y/N, for taking care of our boss." She shook her head, waving her arms in dismissal. "Absolutely no worries, sir." They walked away, closing the door behind them. "She's cute, right?"

Chris blinked at me. "You have a crush on her!" he guffawed. "Duh, man. Did you even look at her? Girl was oozing sexiness," I smiled in fond memory. "Okay this got weird fast, I'm just gonna take you to bed." He got me to my room, placed me on the bed and left.

As soon as my head hit the pillow, I passed out.

End Flashback.

"Y/N!" I yelled, jumping out of my seat to catch her in time. "Get a suite ready," I barked angrily at a few people, who immediately ran in fear. "And you, get me some water and a blanket." The person nodded shakily and ran out of the room. I picked Y/N up and carried her to the couch, laying her down. I sat next to her, checking her temperature.

Oh no, I needed a doctor. I took out my phone and called my personal practitioner but before I could speak, Y/N coughed. "Y/N," I whispered, cutting the call. "Sebastian, it hurts," she moaned. "Don't worry, doll, I'm calling my doctor. Stay here tonight."

"I don't have anywhere else to go." I froze. "Your house?" I asked. "That's… that's where I got attacked. I can't go back," she cried. "Wait, just— just take rest, we'll talk when you're better. Get some sleep, I'm calling my doctor." I called him again, glancing at Y/N when she took my other hand and closed her eyes. 

I chatted with him for five minutes; he said he'd take half-an-hour to get to my place. "Damn it," I grumbled, keeping my phone on the table. Just then, one of my servants returned with the glass of water and the blanket. I thanked her and she left the room, so it was just me and Y/N.

"Y/N, sweetie, can you please get up for me?" She opened her eyes. "What?" Oh God, she was getting weaker. "Have some water." As soon as I held the glass of water in front of her, she freaked out. Screaming, she pushed the glass out of my hand and it fell to the floor with a 'clang', the water spilling everywhere.

"No, no water, no… no…" She sobbed, pulling at her hair. "Okay, okay, no water! No water! Y/N, calm—" I grabbed her hands and clutched them in mine. She stopped sobbing; looked at our hands and then at my face. I brought her hands to my lips, softly kissing them. "No water. It's okay, Y/N, you're safe with me."

"Safe," she breathed heavily, "That's what he said to me before he poisoned me!" Who was he? Okay, she was getting insanely paranoid now… "I'm not like him, Y/N, I don't wanna hurt you," I whispered, looking straight into her eyes.

"Yes, you are! You both can't handle drinks!" she yelled, her tears beginning to flow once more. "Wait." My nostrils flared. Her ex-boyfriend, he harmed her? "Y/N, please, this is not good for your health, why don't you try to calm down? Breathe, baby girl, please," I pleaded.

She seemed to momentarily come to her senses. "Sebastian…" Without warning, she sat up and flung herself in my arms. And for once, I didn't mind holding her close. "You're okay with me. I'm not him. I am not going to harm you, Y/N, trust me," I mumbled into her hair, rubbing her back.

"I trusted him," she sobbed, "And he tried to kill me." This time, my anger won. I vowed to myself, if I don't kill her ex boyfriend in the next 24 hours— "I am nothing like him. We may have one shared trait," I rolled my eyes at its stupidity, "But I am nothing like him. For once, I wouldn't harm you even in my dreams."

Her sobs started to subside. "That's it, doll, don't cry. I'll keep you safe. Even if I die trying, I'll let no harm come to you." For 7 long months, I missed her. I missed her a bit too much. Every waking moment of mine was spent thinking about the beautiful bartender.

She was in my dreams. She was constantly on my mind. I longed for the moment when I could meet her again and ask her out. Alas, that time never came. 

A week after we met, I had to go to Romania for some important work. I spent three months there and when I was back, Y/N was no longer working at the bar. She found a new job and I had no way of locating her anywhere.

I knew Anthony dropped her home that one time but when I asked him, he told me she had asked him to drop him off somewhere else. From there, he said, she was going to walk alone. He offered to drop her home again, but she refused. Having no choice, he returned without knowing where she lived.

That resulted in me not knowing where she was. I was heartbroken and told myself to stop thinking about her. I became more and more engaged in work, I became moody, temperamental and cold-hearted. Everyone started fearing me more now.

And I finally saw what Y/N meant.

What if you snap one day?

That day was closer than I thought. Even though I became a much more accomplished mobster, there was one thing I couldn't do even if I tried— forget about the love of my life. 

"Seb, it hurts." I was brought back to the real world. "What hurts, baby girl?" I whispered, pulling her closer. "Head. Stomach. Legs. Arms. Heart." I smiled sadly at the last word. "I'll help you heal, Y/N, you don't have to go anywhere until you're better." She nuzzled into my neck. "I'd like that."

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. "Come in," I called out, it was probably the doctor. Sure enough...

"Mr Stan? Oh, you have a guest." I tried to shift to make space for the doctor, but Y/N whimpered. "It's okay, Mr Stan, she clearly feels safer with you here." I placed Y/N on my lap, covering her with the blanket. "This is my friend, Y/N," I spoke fondly, though I really wanted to add 'girl' in front of 'friend'.

"Nice to meet you, dear, I am Dr Greenwood." With my help, he quickly ran some tests on her. "Hm, she has a fever, her heart rate is very fast and that's not good. Is there any other problem you're facing?" She nodded. "Headache and stomach ache."

"She claims to be poisoned," I added. "Oh dear me! I need to run a blood test, will you be so kind as to extend your right arm?" She did as he told her and he quickly took some blood. "Will she be fine?" I asked worriedly. 

"Well, she seems to be doing okay currently, which means the poison hasn't affected her yet. How about I get back to you by the morning? Just keep an eye on her and if something happens, bring her to the hospital."

"Okay, doc. Thank you." He nodded and got up. "Bye!" Y/N called out weakly; he smiled at her and left, closing the door behind him. "You've got to tell me everything, doll," I whispered, putting her down on the couch. She lay down and I sat on the floor near her head.

"Okay, I will tell you. It was a few hours ago," she began quietly, "I was at home, watching the seventh season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine when someone rang the bell. When I opened the door, my ex burst into the room forcefully. He pushed me."

My breathing sped up. "He pushed you? How dare that asshole—"

"Let me finish?"

"Go ahead, love, I'm sorry."

"Right, so he was very very drunk. And he was talking about how I broke his heart by breaking up with him and how he was so mad at me that he wanted to kill me. In front of me, he popped open the bottle of beer with him and poured an entire bottle of poison in it! An entire bottle! Then he attacked me and pinned me to the couch, forcing me to drink the poisoned beer."

"How did you escape?" I whispered. "By kicking him in the balls. Unfortunately, I ended up gulping down a sip and panicked. Seeing no other choice, I pushed him as hard as I could and he collided with the table. He hurt himself and became unconscious. I ran out of the house to the first place I could think of— here."

"I'm glad you came to me, Y/N, you'll be perfectly safe here. Our security is top-notch," I chuckled. She smiled, too. "Where are Chris and Anthony?" she noticed. "They're in Romania. They decided to stay back."

"Wait, that's where you were this whole time? You didn't come to the bar again and until then, I found another job so I quit. I thought you would never come back. I missed you a lot," she pouted. "I missed you, too. I was actually in Romania for 3 months and when I came back, I couldn't find you. I didn't even know where you lived, I didn't know where to look."

"What matters is now we're back together again!" she squealed. "You should rest for a while," I muttered, running my fingers through her hair. I checked the time, it was almost 2 am. Laughing when she yawned, I sat up. "I guess I should."

"Come, I'll take you to your room." I stood up with Y/N still in my arms. "I don't wanna be alone," she worriedly spoke, "What if he's awake and comes looking for me and finds me here?" 

"No one is finding you here," I sighed, "I'll stay with you, okay? Just tell me your address." Without thinking, she narrated her entire address and looked up at me with sleep-hooded eyes. I walked into the suite my people had readied for her and placed her down on the bed.

"I'm right here, just relax and try to sleep," I crooned, running my fingers through her hair. She immediately closed her eyes, which relieved me because she was listening now. When her soft snores filled the room, I heaved a breath and got up. Covering her with a blanket, I left the room, quietly closing the door behind me.

---

"This is the place," I spoke to myself, stopping my car under the building. I got out and entered, taking the elevator to the sixth floor where she lived. When I reached her apartment, I noticed that the door was still open. I walked in, my gun ready as I looked around the place. Wow, Y/N maintained this place well.

I searched every room thoroughly, starting with the living room, then the kitchen and then the two bedrooms. Shit, did the asshole leave? Y/N told me she left him in the living room. I was about to leave when I heard belching coming from one of the bathrooms. I opened the door to the one closest to me, only to see someone puking in the toilet.

"Ew," I whispered and he looked up. "What the fuck—" He flushed the toilet and wiped his mouth with the toilet paper, "—are you doing here?" I realized he was still under the effects of heavy drinking. "Y/N told me everything," I sneered, hiding my gun behind my back.

"She knows you? Pfft, I knew she was a whore, why would she leave me for a goddamn mobster? Everyone in the city hates you," he jeered back. "Um, why don't you consider this? You're an abusive and possessive asshole and Y/N left you because you obviously were treating her badly?" I snapped.

"Don't get smart with me," he snarled, taking out a knife from his back pocket. "Oh," he snorted when I glanced at the knife, "Yes, I came prepared to cut that bitch up if she tried to fight back." The language he was using to describe Y/N was getting to me now.

"Enough!" I stated firmly, so firmly that even he paused. "I will not have you talking about Y/N like this, you are crossing a line." He returned to laughing. "Care too much about one of your sluts? What is she, your girlfriend?" Okay, he didn't have to rub it in…

"I said—'' I whipped out the gun and pointed it at him, "—enough. If you don't stop badmouthing Y/N—" He interrupted me again by laughing. "Of course, you're gonna shoot me. You like to murder innocent people, that's all you are! A bloody, fucking cold-hearted murderer! Y/N would never leave me for a guy like you! She is your slut!" he spat.

"Are you listening to yourself?! You tried to fucking kill Y/N because she couldn't put up with your abusive ways and your disturbing habits! I do not kill innocent people and I don't plan on killing them ever," I growled, "However, I do make exceptions for abusive boyfriends who treat my friend wrong!" 

With that, before he could retort, I fired three bullets at him. All three hit him in the chest and I watched as he fell against the floor, instantly dead. Some of his blood sprayed on my clothes and face, which made me scrunch up my face in disgust. But as I watched his lifeless body on the floor, a smile bloomed on my face. 

Y/N was safe.

I checked myself in the bathroom mirror, washed my face and decided to go back. But before I could, I realized that Y/N would be spending some time with me and would need her necessities. So before leaving, I packed two full-sized travel bags with her clothes, electronics, footwears, toiletries and sanitation products; anything I deemed necessary for day-to-day living.

Soon, I left the apartment with the bags to go back to Y/N.

---

"Seb?"

I looked up from my book as Y/N sat up, yawning and clutching her head. "Y/N, the results came back, you're going to be fine," I told her happily, sitting down next to her. "Really?" A smile bloomed on her face. "Yes! Dr Greenwood said you didn't swallow too much poison and that you will most likely excrete the amount you swallowed." She nodded.

"That's great news! I'm glad he brought one of those cheap poisons instead of the deadly ones," she giggled. Just his mention made my temper snap. "Oh, don't even talk about that jerk," I snarled, "I took care of him last night and now he won't be bothering you anymore."

She blinked at me. "You killed him, didn't you?" she deadpanned and I blushed. "I mean— I didn't—" I stammered but gave up when she raised an eyebrow. "Yes, I killed him," I muttered, looking at my lap. When she placed her hand on my cheek, I turned to look. "I'm not mad at you. Bitch had it coming."

I burst out laughing at her word choice, which made her smile, too. All of a sudden, she leaped up and wrapped her arms around my neck, catching my lips in a kiss. I stopped laughing and put my arms around her waist, kissing back. Had this just happened? Was she kissing me?

"I love you, Sebastian," she murmured upon pulling away, straddling my lap. I kept the book away and pulled her closer. "Really? I love you, too." She snorted. "Kinda obvious, you killed a man for me. I wasn't going to make a move on you but now I'm sure."

"Hm, my intelligent sweetheart," I grinned, leaning forward to kiss her again. The problem was solved and all was well. "What are your plans for the day?" she asked me, trailing a finger down my face, jaw, neck and chest. "Hm, don't have any," I smirked, pulling her closer.

"Wanna stay and… have some fun?"

"Boy, do I?"

Y/N laughed loudly as I flipped us over, laying down on top of her. Her laughs soon transitioned into moans as I attacked her neck and jaw with kisses.

We did have fun.

A lot of it.

A bit too much of it.

But who cares?

I was finally with the love of my life and everything was good.

---

A/N: Leave a like if you enjoyed! Thanks for reading!

[likeshipsonthesea]

dex, team bicycle

the following bullet fic has been in my drafts for over a year now and tonight i remembered it existed, read it, and decided to post it. why? who knows. don’t ask questions. just ~enjoy~

so i got an ask about how anon trusts me implicitly when it comes to writing bc they believe that dex is the team bicycle and eventually ends up with nursey and thinks i’m down with that too and tbh they ain’t wrong so like

here’s a bullet fic instead of me doing any of the work i SHOULD REALLY FUCKING BE DOING okie

first things first here’s the dealio this is crack-ish but also not so crackish that my dumbass couldn’t see it happening so let’s just suspend some disbelief and have a good time

first time dex hooks up with a teammate it’s not at a kegster

maybe a little later he’s a little too tipsy at a kegster not really knowing his own tolerance for tub juice yet and he’s dancing, a little more white boy than maybe one would like but he’s having fun with it and that’s half the game, and he’s sweaty and maybe some glitter from other dancers has rubbed off on him and he’s glittery and shining and he catches someone’s eye across the room (holster, i’m thinking holster) and holster sees him and thinks fuck and dex is maybe really into how big holster is and just like follows him up to the attic when holster grabs his wrist and pulls because why not--

but this is not about that (at least not yet) this is about how dex, new to samwell and ncaa hockey and everything, wants to be the best he can be in everything so naturally he goes to the best person to help him with every thing (for school he gets tutors and goes to tutorials and goes to all the profs’ office hours, for social stuff maybe he trails ransom around idk (that’s for later)) but for hockey he obviously goes to the person you go to when you need help with hockey

jack

LOOK OKAY I GET IT ZIMBITS FOR LIFE BUT HEAR ME OUT

jack likes hockey. jack likes people who like hockey. jack likes when people are really into hockey

so when the little angery frog that seemed real appreciative of his butt on hazeapalooza comes to him with this frowny face determination asking how he can be the best player he can be, a part of jack’s brain that’s very quiet and seldom acknowledged goes “huh.”

and maybe they start meeting up for their own practices, practicing drills and plays so dex can get his speed up and reaction time down and just get better and jack’s benefiting from it too in a way, like trying to help a defensive player makes him have to switch up his thinking about things a bit and it’s helping his defensive play on the ice

and so this goes on for a bit and maybe they build up some inside jokes in between all the intensity and maybe there’s some playful moments in the locker room when they bump arms or throw a few chirps around and it’s cute okay and not too serious, jack isn’t in love with the kid (he’s a kid, lord, okay a lil problematic but if y’all know anything about my oc luke dex has Problems with Authority figures so whatever)

but the truth is jack doesn’t really have many people he’d be comfortable “relieving some stress” with, like there’s shitty but he’s ridiculously straight, and Camila went and got herself a girlfriend so that’s no longer a thing, and dex is there and eager and fun and

and long story short they end up fucking in the locker room oops

it doesn’t happen too many times after that, maybe once on a roadie, a few times at the haus. it’s fun, not in a laughing way or whatever, but it’s casual and it’s nice to get off and it doesn’t make jack any more anxious and dex is probably working through some issues he has with tall dark haired captains and they both get something good out of it, which is the point, anyway

and it ends maybe before winter break, either jack decides to focus on the nhl and his thesis and dex totally understands or dex realizes that maybe his thing with dark haired captains isn’t completely healthy and ends things but either way it’s nbd and no one on the team ever really knows, though it’s not like they lie about it either but who’s gonna ask, right?

and so dex and jack were fuckbuddies. for a time. noice.

now let’s return to that kegster scene, hmm?

so the way i picture it is dex hooks up with holster at a kegster, realizes it probably wasn’t the smartest idea he’s ever had but doesn’t completely freak out because holster’s a relaxed kind of guy, dex is sure it won’t get nuts

meanwhile holster wakes up freaking out because he just fucked ransom’s frog and that is so not cool so then he panics and avoids ransom and dex for like a week and then decides okay okay it’s not a big deal he just won’t tell anyone, it won;t happen again, it’s fine

and then he walks in on dex hooking up with ransom and he’s like Wow Okay So the Fine Thing Didn’t Work Out Huh

turns out while holster was freaking out ransom was really mopey about it and dex, not really knowing how to fix it, tried to comfort him and ended up... in bed

look this version of dex is a little thotty and knows like two ways of comforting people and he didn’t think getting drunk in the middle of the day was a good idea

and so long story short after some brief HUHs going around dex ends up hooking up with both ransom and holster for a bit (sometimes both at once!) and eventually the both-at-once-stuff makes ransom and holster actually acknowledge the feelings they’ve mostly been ignoring since their frog year and they explain this to dex who’s like okie bc he’s really only there bc they’re both hot and so ransom and holster get together and dex sometimes helps them out on date nights and that’s about it

lbr tho they never tell anyone how they actually got together bc they would never live it down so they say nothing and dex doesn’t either bc it’s not his relationship and the world goes on never knowing

so now we’re getting into the middle of spring term dex’s frog year and he’s kind of maybe sort of acknowledged that he has some kind of emotions about nursey that aren’t helpful so he’s attempting to repress real hard, but he’s also learning to repress less about other things, specifically his enjoyment of baking.

yup. you guessed it.

Bitty.

so he starts helping bitty in the kitchen A Lot, and sometimes they talk and sometimes they don’t and sometimes they talk about important things but most of the time they don’t, but at this stage in bitty’s life he is crushing very hard on a certain dark haired captain and that’s kind of really apparent in, like, everything he does so it takes dex maybe two weeks to realize what’s going on

and okay so it’s a little awkward bc 1-the fuckbuddies thing but also bc 2-dex knows how it feels to have feelings for a friend and it kind of sucks like a lot and he wants to make bitty feel better and yeah maybe this is another case of dex being bad at comforting people with his clothes on

but maybe also one day they’re talking about relationships/being gay idk something and bitty maybe casually (southern euphemistically) mentions that he’s never, erm, never quite, uh, never  done the dirty with a boy and maybe he sounds a lil embarassed about it idk and dex’s I Can Fix That brain switches on and he says, “I can help.”

and bitty’s like. what.

dex blushes and clears his throat and says it again. “i can help. i’ve, uh, done it before, and i can, like. show you.” then he pauses and, very uncasually, says, “casually.”

bitty, also pink at his point because he’s a sweet southern boy who doesn’t speak of such things, asks, “you’d be willing to do that?”

dex nods. he does not say that he’s done something like that before. he very pointedly does not say that.

and bitty, well, he’s pining and he’s been at college for a year and a half and the most action he’s ever gotten was with that boy who puked on his shoes and, you know, he came to samwell so that he could be who he is and maybe this is a way he can prove to himself that he is being true to himself.

it also doesn’t hurt that dex is v pretty, okay, bitty loves a boy with big shoulders and freckles.

and so dex and bitty start hooking up.

it’s somewhat like my The Arrangement fic where dex is sort of “showing bitty the ropes” but bitty, lbr, he’s a quick learner and he did his research so it very quickly just becomes hooking up for the sake of it

and it’s good. like. really good and both of them are benefiting from having someone to escape from their ~feelings~ in and bitty’s more comfortable in sexuality (like, his sexuality not his gayness ya feel me?) and everyone’s having a great time

then they lose the playoffs and emotions run high and bitty realizes how decimated he’s going to be by jack leaving and they don’t really have a conversation about it (let’s be real, neither of these boys talk about their feelings, at least not at this point) but dex goes home that summer with the understanding that he and bitty are no longer doing the thing, and that’s okay with him, really, because maybe now his feelings for nursey are becoming More of A Thing Than He Was Hoping They Would

of course bitty gets with jack at this time, so he’s kind of through the roof, and if, maybe, they have a conversation about their ex’s/past lovers and find they have.. more things in common than expected, well, at the least it’s a bit of a laugh and at the most well. let’s just say sometimes a ginger is mentioned in their bed WHATEVER OKAY MOVING ON

dex comes back in the fall ready to suppress the fuck out of his emotions and play some damn good hockey and who appears but this super eager tadpole

this now plays out as the first two chapters of my The Arrangement fic, though i guess now for canonical reasons whiskey ends up with lax bro and not tango, but that’s alright, we’re good at working on our feet here

for those who haven’t read the fic, dex shows whiskey how to gay sex while simultaneously gaining his trust and encouraging him to bond with the team and for personal reasons whiskey is a little shit but not as much of an asshole as he was in canon (look i love the guy but he’s a dick) and anyway go read my fic it’s good i promise #selfspon moving on

the latter half of dex’s sophomore year is spent mostly Not Pining for nursey and getting closer to him, friend wise, until the whole dib-flip, living together situation occurs, dex has a Freak Out, and ruins things a little

..this is getting off track, but long story short, his captains kiss each other on live tv and dex’s family starts to suspect that all those rumors that drifted around him in high school may have more truth to them than they’d been hoping and dex has a less than great summer break, coming back to school in the opposite of a good mindset

nursey also has a not great break (his parents are fighting, then he comes to school and breaks his wrist and can’t play hockey) and well we all know where this ends up

this leaves dex in a very mopey gross state and who to help someone feel better in their time of need than the sweetest little waffle you’ve ever seen in your life?

yes, it’s time for Hops.

now, this is a rather short lived affair, but over thanksgiving break, the entirety of the haus goes home to their families except for dex (who says he can’t deal with bus fare, and begs off any offers of help) and hops, who technically isn’t in the Haus, but stays there for the break while his parents are on a work trip during the holiday

dex ends up finding out just exactly how College Hockey Boy hops is when he almost burns the kitchen down trying to make a grilled cheese and dex decides then that he has to help this boy learn how to human, so they spend the first two days together with dex teaching hops all the basic skills dex thinks someone should know

this is included but not limited to: how to cook without making fire, how to change the oil in your car, how to hotwire a car, how to fix various different appliances, how to take the optimal notes, how to basic code, and how to sort and do your laundry

hops is enjoying the crash course (kid is just grateful to finally know where the detergent goes in a washer) but also, like, lbr. watching someone be competent in a thing--esp a thing you are yourself not good at--is a giant turn on, and so after two days of watching dex be really good at adulting, they settle onto the couch after doing the dishes and hops just gets on his knees and--

we aren’t smutting here on good christian tumblr but boy. hops is an eager kid.

anyway they spend a week fucking and then stop because hops falls in love with a girl in his intro class and then spends the next two months asking dex for advice on how to woo her, even though obviously chowder would be a better bet.

then comes the playoffs and everything is heating up and they’re on roadies nearly every weekend, still keeping up with their coursework, and it’s A Lot, and dex is really feeling it this year, especially with all the shit bitty’s been getting, and one night, on a roadie, he and bully get back to their room and dex collapses with a groan on the bed and bully, chill as anything, is like. “you seem pretty stressed. wanna fuck?”

and, you know what? dex is still his thotty (though more mature) self and he’s like, life sucks a little right now, why not get off

and so he does.

he and bully hook up through the playoffs and into the post-season (that post-final game sex is A Lot my dudes lemme tell you) but then dex gets elected captain and something twisty in his chest tells him that he should not be fucking someone on the team, especially not an underclassman, when he’s got that authority over him, and so he breaks it off with bully

who is pretty chill about it, since he’s bully, though he does miss the sex. the sex was p good.

and, to be quite honest, that’s it. dex wouldn’t fuck any of the baby frogs for the same reason he broke it off with bully (also ngl the senior-freshman thing doesn’t do it for him anymore) and so dex goes through his senior year of college without having any fuckbuddies--his first year of college so far, actually, where he doesn;t

the end

.

.

.

lol jk he and nursey start hooking up and it’s a Whole Bundle of emotions

in keeping with the rest of the fuck buddies, dex thinks that this is just like all the other times and nursey has no reason to think dex wants anything more and like. the sex is good, like very good, and neither of them are complaining per se but they’re also in love and haven’t said anything, and i imagine there are some ill-timed confessions prior to the final game of the playoffs and then they win another ncaa championship title and have sex in a janitor’s closet (but like,, emotional sex) and they live happily (thottily) ever after

i also like to imagine that there’s a point somewhere down the line when they all meet up for a reunion and something happens-- probably ransom and holster get a lil tipsy and finally tell the truth of how they got together-- and everyone basically does the spider-man meme but with “wait-you had sex with dex? i had sex with dex” and nursey--who knows bc dex told him when they finally got together-- is just sitting there all smug with his arm around a steadily reddening dex bc he’s fucking proud of the fact that everyone knows exactly how good his boyfriend is in bed

[peggyrose19]

Amnesia

Hehe. You knew it was coming :) I have no regrets. More Harvard FinnLo angst. This is not an amnesia fic, as the title may suggest, but rather a song fic based off Amnesia by 5SOS. Companion fic to Bablyon, which you can read here if you’d like. Characters as always by @lumosinlove <3

Also, I tried so hard to proofread this and it just did not work. So... oops?

I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted

I thought about our last kiss, how it felt the way you tasted

When he felt particularly self-deprecating, Logan would drive. It didn’t happen often, but sometimes the night became too dark and the house became too bright and he needed to get away from it all. Sometimes remembering Finn hurt too much. 

He would drive in circles, no real direction, just burning time and miles. His mind would take him unwittingly to all the places he associated with Logan, as if reminding him of all he used to have. The coffee shop they frequented each morning. The pizza place two doors down they always went to Fridays after practice. The library they always ended up at whenever Finn had a test. The bar they frequented with the team after a win. The rink they spent most of their days. 

Logan would drive by every place that broke his heart and wonder where they had gone wrong. Wonder if they had just talked, if they had stopped for one moment, if Finn would still be his. Wonder if he ever truly had him. 

When he really felt bad for himself, Logan would head to the frat house where they had kissed for the first time. It had unlocked something in him, feeling Finn’s lips against his. All night he had watched girls touching Finn and kissing him, wanting him for nothing more than his body. And Logan suddenly couldn’t stand it anymore.

Those nights he would go home with tears in his eyes to find their dorm room exactly the way Finn left it. His stuff was gone, and so was he, but his presence remained. On those nights Logan would get in his bed and cry, remembering their last kiss the night before Finn left him, curled in this tiny twin bed together, Finn begging for his forgiveness.

Sometimes I start to wonder, was it just a lie?

If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

'Cause I'm not fine at all 

“Hey, Fish,” Logan’s voice came through the phone. He sounded normal. It hit Finn like a truck.

“Hey.” Finn swallowed hard, throat tight. He and Logan had only talked a few times in the month since he’d left for Gryffindor. With so many practices, he had little time to himself these days. 

“How’s the team?” Logan always asked that, these days. Finn was getting kind of sick of the question. He didn’t say that though.

“Good. They’re good. It’s all… it’s all good.” It wasn’t but Logan didn’t need to know that.

Finn could hear his smile as Logan said, “I’m happy for you.” He wanted to scream. He wanted to shake Logan, get him to stop sounding so happy and chipper all the time, get rid of that stupid endearing accent, thicker since he’d gotten home for the summer. 

It felt sometimes like nothing had ever happened between them. Sometimes Finn wondered if he’d just dreamed it, Logan’s lips against his, their bodies pressed together, the emotions swelling in his heart. He wondered if they’d ever meant anything at all. Hearing Logan sound so normal was just the final nail in the coffin. 

“Hey, Lo, I gotta go,” Finn said, interrupting the story Logan was telling him about an old teammate. He wasn’t sure he could sit here anymore and pretend everything was fine. “My uh, my mom’s calling. I’ll talk to you later?”

“Oh.” He sounded surprised. “Yeah, okay. Say hi for me.”

“I will. Bye.”

“Bye.”

The line clicked and went dead. Finn put his phone down and cried.

I remember the day you told me you were leaving

I remember the make-up running down your face

And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them

Like every single wish we ever made 

Logan could see it clearly when he closed his eyes. He could hear the silence closing in around him, the shakiness in Finn’s voice, the ringing of a cell phone. He saw it all in reverse, standing in the middle of their old dorm room. 

“What-” Finn’s voice was shaking as he hung up the phone. Logan watched him, curiosity and dread fighting in his mind.

“Who was that?” Logan asked, fighting to keep his voice steady.

Finn swallowed hard. “I’ve been drafted to the Gryffindor Lions.”

“Holy shit. Holy shit. Finn, that’s incredible!” Logan launched himself at his best friend, pulling him into a hug. 

“Yeah, I can’t… I can’t really believe it.” He let out a laugh. “I mean… me? Playing pro? Can you imagine?”

“Of course I can. Fish. You’re gonna do amazing, I know it.”

“It means I’m leaving.” 

The elation drained from the room. 

“Well… not for a little while, right?” Logan asked hesitantly.

Finn shrugged. “Pretty soon.”  

“Finn, I-” Logan opened his mouth, searching for the right words. But he found nothing. There was nothing left to say. 

Something painful twisted in Logan’s chest as he watched Finn pull away. It was too soon, far too soon. 

“Lo.” The familiar voice shook him from his thoughts. He looked up at Finn, who was staring at him with sad eyes. 

He sighed, “Finn, don’t look at me like that.”

“I don’t-” he shook his head. “Please be happy for me?”

“Fuck, Harz, of course I’m happy for you. You’re in the NHL now. It’s what we’ve always dreamed about, remember? Going pro? It just also means you’re leaving.”

“Logan…” He looked up at Finn again and there were tears in his brown eyes.

“Finn, don’t-” Logan stopped, squeezed his eyes shut, opened them again. Finn was still looking at him. “C’mere,” he muttered, and hugged Finn again. Despite the height difference, Finn buried his face in Logan’s shoulder, holding him tight. 

Logan remembered all the times Finn had held him, after a win on the ice, late nights out when he got drunk and couldn’t walk straight, early mornings getting coffee before either was fully awake. He remembered all the dreams Finn had whispered into his ear when they’d climb up to the roof after everyone was asleep, about going pro, meeting their idols. About one day writing a book, maybe on hockey, a true literature nerd to his core. And once, when Finn was drunk and exhausted, a future of them, together. 

It seemed Finn’s dream was coming true.

One of them at least.

They never talked about those nights after. It left Logan to his skewed memories of Finn’s words, his delirious confessions to the stars. All those dreams he shared that he never seemed to remember. It was like Finn didn’t need them anymore, didn’t need him. He was a thing of the past, a part of a bigger story. They still talked, sure. But it was different. Finn wasn’t there anymore. And there was no breaching that gap. 

So Logan kept the memories and the promises to himself. He went to class, he did his homework, he talked to friends. He worked hard at practice and he called Finn and he buried deep the yearning in his heart. And he pretended it didn’t cut him to the bone.

 The pictures that you sent me they're still living in my phone

I'll admit I like to see them, I'll admit I feel alone

Finn’s home screen was a picture Logan had taken, that Finn didn’t have the heart to change, no matter how much it hurt anytime he looked at it. It was of the two of them, one morning after practice, cheeks flushed and smiles wide. Finn couldn’t remember now why they’d taken the picture, just the hours he’d spent staring at it, Logan’s smile and bright eyes and mussed up hair. 

He kept hoping he’d feel better the longer he looked at it, as if it would bring Logan back to his side. It never worked, in fact it did the opposite. All it did was widen the yawning cavern in his chest. He just felt alone, staring at their smiles. And he was alone. He was all alone in a different city and a foreign hotel room and a new team. 

So Finn looked at pictures of the two of them, of when his world still had stability, and ignored the pain they brought. He pushed it down, the loneliness and regret. Pretended he wasn’t missing Logan like crazy, like it wasn’t a bullet to his heart each time. 

He wanted Logan back.

 It's like we never happened, was it just a lie?

If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

'Cause I'm not fine at all

Finn seemed fine. He sounded tired, perhaps a little lonely, but overall fine. So why did Logan feel like such a mess? Why did he struggle to get up in the morning, the bags under his eyes growing darker as he fought back tears anytime he was reminded of Finn. Why did it feel like nothing had ever happened at all? 

As the call connected, Logan took a breath. He knew Finn didn’t have a lot of time, knew he would have to go soon. He pretended to himself his call wasn’t timed on purpose.

“Hey Fish,” he said as brightly as he could manage. Finn replied, voice steady. Logan didn’t know what to say after that, wasn’t sure what you asked the boy you were crushing on when he was hundreds of miles away. 

It hurt, knowing seemed so okay after everything. He wasn’t sure what was true and what was a lie anymore. He could still remember Finn’s choked-off breaths that first conversation after he’d left. Logan had pretended he couldn’t hear Finn’s cries, pretended everything was fine. He hadn’t known what else to say.

Maybe neither of them was fine.  

“Hey, Lo, I gotta go,” Finn said, breaking through Logan’s thoughts. He had been talking, although now he wasn’t sure what he’d been saying. 

Logan said goodbye quietly, Finn’s voice still ringing in his ears as he hung up the phone. Oh how he wished the pain would fade. 

 If today I woke up with you right beside me

Like all of this was just some twisted dream

I'd hold you closer than I ever did before

And you'd never slip away

Logan hadn’t realized all he’d had until suddenly Finn was gone from his side. He didn’t realize how much he loved him until he was no longer by his side, making him laugh and leveling him out. He missed him. He loved him.

And he wished he hadn’t wasted it all out of fear. He wished he’d had the courage to realize what he wanted, to reach out and grab it. He wished Finn would come back. He wished he could just wake up and Finn would be by his side once more. 

Except he wasn’t sure what he’d do when he saw Finn again. Pretend nothing between them had happened, nothing had changed? Or would he hold him close and whisper in his ear all the words he’d never said before. He wanted him close, he knew that. Wanted it so bad he didn’t know what to do with himself. But he knew, he knew no matter what happened, he would never let Finn slip away. 

I wish that I could wake up with amnesia

And forget about the stupid little things

Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you

And the memories I never can escape

Finn slumped onto the couch of his hotel room, feeling the loneliness creeping in again now that he was alone. It was just him these days, the homesickness finding him each night, the newness wearing off now three months in. Some days he wished he would wake up and he’d be back at Harvard, the familiar sounds of the city and the frat house surrounding him, Logan lying in the bed beside him. 

Finn grabbed for his phone, finding in between the cushions, and unlocked it. A moment later he hadn’t moved, staring unseeingly at the bright screen. He wasn’t entirely sure what he’d been looking for in the first place. 

His home screen was a picture Logan had taken, that Finn didn’t have the heart to change, no matter how much it hurt anytime he looked at it. It was of the two of them, one morning after practice, cheeks flushed and smiles wide. Finn couldn’t remember now why they’d taken the picture, just the hours he’d spent staring at it, Logan’s smile and bright eyes and mussed up hair.

Logan. 

At the heart of everything lay Logan. A constant presence in Finn’s mind, always there, always hovering at the edge of his thoughts. He never left, not really. Every little thing Finn did Logan somehow crept in. Every memory, every store, every play on the ice was tainted with Logan, unavoidable no matter how hard Finn tried. Even lying in bed at night, he could remember his last morning in Boston, pressed against Logan as he fought tears in the early-morning heat. 

Some days Finn wished he could go back there. Go back to the late nights and early mornings, hard practices and too-sweet coffee, his best friend by his side. He wanted to go back and tell Logan, tell him how he felt. Tell him that he wanted him, damn the consequences, damn the pain. He was already in pain. He was tired of it. He wanted him. 

Some days Finn wished he didn’t remember him at all

 I'm not fine at all

No, I'm really not fine at all

Tell me this is just a dream

'Cause I'm really not fine at all

[purekesseltrash]

My Fic List

Whelp, decided I should do one of these.  I have mostly written for Hockey RPF and BNHA, as you have likely already seen!

My BNHA Fics

Bury Them Deep

- “Shouji Mezou's entire life has revolved around being a goalie and playing hockey since he was five years old. After being drafted in the third round in the NHL, Shouji has two more years of college before moving on to playing professional hockey like he's always wanted. Or at least like he always thought he wanted. An injury that ends his season throws him into a tailspin, forcing him to take a look at his life and how he is going to live it, especially after meeting his fascinating new goth history tutor.”

(This bad bitch is 81k total and is chock full of my red hot hockey takes and midwestern references.  I love it very much and it is a sweet baby.)

The Rooftop Necromancy series AKA my black metal band AU:

Downhill from Here 

- “ Hizashi just wants to tour the country with his best friends with their metal band in their shitty van like they've been planning for years. He'd successfully hidden his crush on one of them for years, after all, he would definitely be able to make this work and keep things fun and uncomplicated. Until Aizawa decided to start acting weird. “

(In which I take you all on a nostalgic trip to 2006-2008 metal culture and you can see the black metal love song that my dumb ass wrote.)

The Perfect Mistake

- “ It wasn't as though Hizashi had planned on breaking up with his boyfriend while they were on tour in a tiny cargo van with no room and no peace. He would have much rather preferred to do it when they were home and he could easily go and crawl back into his mom's basement. But he didn't have a choice. “

(As relationships tend to do, theirs goes through problems.)

Rooftop Necromancy

-"He’d even ended up leaning into the crowd when someone’s elbow had connected solidly with his nose and thrown him back. They’d gone quiet as Hizashi got himself up to his feet, ripped off his now bloody ‘Within Temptations’ tshirt from 2004, whipped his hair back from his face and screamed, “That’s what I’m FUCKING talking about.” into the mic.

They went wild for it, cheering as blood ran down his nose, past his mouth and dripped onto the stage, leaving him feeling like an otherworldly monster performing an occult ritual. Metal, he thought dazedly to himself, why in the fuck had he ever stopped doing metal."

(I hyperfocused so hard at the idea of Mic as a metal head that I wrote this in seven straight hours and WROTE THROUGH THE ATTEMPTED COUP ON DEMOCRACY WITHOUT KNOWING IT.  It’s a bit rough, but it’s got some good parts and it spawned the whole damn series.)

Hands Up

- "But of course he had, they had always been able to read each other and what they meant. That had often been their problem, if he was going to be honest."

(In which they figure their shit out.  Basically it was written when I was thinking alot about how my own mental health had evolved through the years.  It’s basically the story of two people who are both very good for each other and also very bad and how they deal with that.  It’s probably the most personally meaningful thing I’ve ever written.)

The other BNHA fics:

Waking Up With Ghosts

-"Hizashi opened his eyes to a world that belonged to ghosts. His headphones were gone and the gray, grimy world that he felt more than saw was muffled and still. This was bad, he hazily thought."

In which we follow Hizashi shortly after the events of 296. How he's found, how he finds out and how he has to tell.”

(I fished this one out of the garbage of my Google Docs because I’d written most of it and forgotten about it.  I dragged it out, prettied it up a little and threw it up on AO3.  It is by far my most well read BNHA fic, go figure.)

Leave Her Johnny

-”Captain Hizashi Yamada has combed the Seven Seas looking for the elusive smuggler Eraserhead. He has spent years searching for him, tracking his movements and trying to anticipate where he would be next. But he had never considered what would happen when he finally found him. “

(I wrote a paragraph of this and was immediately like ‘I MUST CREATE THIS’.  I take some chances writing wise in this as the whole thing is done in a Victorian Era ish style of writing.  But I think it’s effective and the ending is likely one of the best that I’ve ever managed.  I’m proud of it.)

Gold Rush

-”"That earned him a laugh and Mashirao’s smile made something in his chest ache, something that made him want to hurt. Why had he ever left?

“I’m really not,” Mashirao was saying but Shinsou just shook his head and kissed him once, twice and wished he could take the sunny afternoon and make it stay forever. Make it stay forever like Mashirao somehow had, while the neighborhood had adjusted without Hitoshi’s permission.

“You are,” he said, “And I love it.”

I love you, he should have said.  But as Mashirao’s eyes softened and the blonde pushed him back against the bed, Hitoshi knew he didn’t need to say it."

(You know how sometimes you listen to a Death Cab for Cutie song about gentrification over and over until a fic comes out?  Because that’s basically what happened here.)

Black Sun

‘"But then he remembered the way that Shouji had eaten the night after, one hand curled into his hair as he hung back in the corner. Shouji hid when something was wrong, like a wounded cat trying to find a dark place to either live or die and he was being released tomorrow. Now was the time to push or he’d find Shouji right back on his bed, staring at nothing."

Something happened to Shouji on the beach. Tokoyami is sure of it.‘

(Aaaaaand Death Cab for Cutie strikes again.  But heyo, my first published ShouToko and it is SOFTTTTT)

In the Far and Mighty West

Mic came closer and despite himself, Shouta could not find it in him to feel afraid. “You won’t understand, not really. I’ll try, though. I’m like Pecos Bill or Paul Bunyan or a jackalope or that fish that your friend caught that he swears he brought in but that you’ve never seen proof of. I’m the herd of dogies moving sweet and steady in the right direction, I’m no stragglers to worry about, I’m that perfect dog that’s there to keep them in line. I’m that group of good friends that you would kill for, I’m the woman who you’re dying to come home to, I’m that promised home of milk and honey. I’m Mic.”

Shouta stared at him dazedly and licked his lips, feeling drunk and stupid as he stared at the man. “You’re… magic?”

“I suppose you could call me that.”

(Cowboy!Erasermic.  Inspired heavily by American Gods and my own love of folk heroes.)

In Your Violence

- “'Mezou frowned, eyes narrowing. “Are you trying to say that you’re scared that I’ll be killed by having faith in you?”

“It would be in your best interest to stay away from me,” Fumikage finally said, his voice falling flat and quiet. “I am destined to be a monster.”

'Mezou gets the call he fears, the one that says that Fumikage has lost control again. But this time it's different, in more ways than one.”

(I listened to Silence by Marshmello until I went insane in this is the result.  Featuring some of my super depressing headcanons about Shouji!  But it’s not awful.)

My hockey fics that I still like:

Hufflepuff Halfwit  

- ““Zhenya, the wind is coming from the west, I will not remind you again. You shut that window before the house stinks of factories!” She snapped and Geno stared at the owl as though maybe it would know what to do. But instead, it had given a little hoot and wiggled inside, only to drop it’s letter on the counter.

He turned his head very slowly back to look at his mother, who had suddenly gone very quiet. “It… just showed up, Mama. And um. It brought a letter.” He waited again, looked back at the owl who had begun to nose at the pirozhkis in interest and then looked back at his mother with the best puppy dog eyes he had ever attempted. “Can I keep it?”

(This is a part of my hockey/Harry Potter au that still legitimately haunts my dreams.  It’s basically a Sid/Geno in Hogwarts but I really love the world building I got to do with Koldovstoretz, the Russian school of wizardry.  Don’t read ‘On the Word of a Slytherin’ though, I’m not as proud of that one.)

The Prince  

- “What the fuck.” Matt breathed out, sitting back heavily onto his hotel bed as he stared at his phone.

‘This is Henrik.’ The text read. ‘I would like to meet you. I will book a room in Pittsburgh at your convenience. Let me know what time will work for you.’  - 

(Listen, it’s Henrik Lundqvist/Matt Murray smut, I feel like that is novel and interesting and worth your attention.  I wax poetic on goalies in this, as you do.)

The Zoo of Toronto 

- “No one missed it when a massive porcupine had shuffled in between the reporters with a single minded focus, pushing media away until it was able to grip onto Phil’s suit pants and try to pull itself up. He hadn’t been able to do more then besides pick the animal up before it could shred his pants to shreds and walk out of the locker room before the decision had been made with the Toronto media.

Phil Kessel was guilty.” 

(Not gonna lie, this is probably my favorite of the hockey fics I’ve written.  And it’s Phil/Carl, which is never found anymore but it was a good pairing.)