#it was either this or him hating on women

[bunnys-kisses]

retired!price liked that you had daddy issues. aw, did someone not have a functioning relationship with their father as a child and now has to find that relationship in older men? aw, poor doll. price was more than okay with being called 'daddy' as long as you called him 'captain' too, especially when you were on your knees. while you got off to having an older man praise you, he got off to a pretty little thing calling him captain. you even went as far as to worship his strong physic, how easily he could bend, flip, turn and press into you.

didn't help that your pussy became a fixation for him.

he was close to fifty, his hip had a habit of locking from time to time. he had been hearing about it for years that it was time to have a family. even simon had managed to make a family, price was still hung up on young tail that he could bully his fat cock into. while most younger women were flavours of the week with no string attached. price made sure to attach every metaphorical string onto you. he had a copy of your apartment key. he added a profile for you on his streaming services. he knew on wednesdays you enjoyed pasta, but hated cooking on the weekend. he knew everything about his precious baby girl. you folded into his praise and always were eager to please. and that was what price loved about you. so imagine his shock (anger) when you told him that you thought you'd have to end your arrangement because you met a guy at your university. and when he asked why, you simply said, "i have to grow up at some point.", and that hit price in the head like an ice pick. if you wanted to grow up so badly, baby girl. there were other ways to do it.

the broken condom held weight in price's pocket while you had few drinks during your last 'date' together, he waited till you got all soft because of the wine. till you were on his side of the booth with your leg over his lap and your face pressed against his bicep. you ran your hand across his chest and giggled, "you're taking this whole break up thing so well." and he petted your head, watching you fold into him further, "like you said, you need to grow up." but you both had different definitions of 'growing up'. for you it meant getting over you daddy issues, but to him it was making him a daddy, for real. you giggled further while he gave you another glass of wine. when you tried to say no, he simply pushed it closer to you, "don't want to waste the bottle." and so easily you were in price's grip.

price took you three times that night. first was in the backseat of his expensive car. he pressed you into a corner, claimed that he needed more space for his larger body. your hazy vision was transfixed on the glimmer of his gold chain against his hairy chest in the low light. your poor body bent in such ways while he pace was relentless. he admired your unsteady gaze and your heavy breathing. he continued to move against you with such a pace that the whole car rocked. but don't worry, the parking lot was dead at that hour. you could scream your head off and no one would hear either of you. he did however put a tear in your panties. right in the crotch area. he sighed and said that he'd need to buy you something a little. while he loved the cheap pairs you owned, he thought his woman deserved something a little nicer. the future mrs. price needed to look next to perfection.

then he fingered you heavily in his bed and watched you squirm. he had to make sure every drop got deep enough before he bullied your sweet pussy once more. he loved the sight of you, still so fucked out from prior. you were in a daze in the car ride home. your breathing was heavy when he pushed the skirt of your dress up a little and teased your cunt while he drove. only to go further once you were naked on his bed. he watched your ass jiggle with each of his power thrusts while he took you from behind. he felt like a mad man while he fucked you. he was determined. he only got to where he was in his career because of grit and determination. he wouldn't back down to a challenge, especially when the stakes were so high. your pussy need to be bred, you needed to be with price. he never wanted to hear anything about another man ever again. price would hate to take drastic measures if another man tried to get in his way. if you needed a collar or a tattoo, the taste of his cum constantly your lips or leaked into your panties, price would do it all to ensure that you were his. the most effective way to ensure that was what kept him going through two rounds of sex without any pains. to get you pregnant. you had already forgotten about the broken condom, it still was in price's pocket! no use using it now, even bother giving the illusion that he wasn't breeding you.

the third time was when you tried to leave the next morning, he had you upside down on the bed. your bottom half on the mattress while all the blood rushed to your head as you tried not to fall on your head. price put bruises on top of bruises. your poor cunt was creamy with promises of the future. a future with him. the blood rush made you cum twice on his cock, adding fresh slick to his coated cock. you thought that older men were supposed to slow down with age. but it felt like price was even quicker than before. his pace brutal, almost like punishment for trying to leave him. but price didn't get to be captain because he followed one plan. he was going to ease you into married life, slowly make you the perfect woman for him. he was traditional that way. church wedding, the white dress, the vows. that would all happen, but might take a little longer. he wasn't too sure that a baby bump would fit nicely in a wedding dress. the thought of you pregnant, trapped to him made him eagerly finish in you two times. and when he got you back up onto the bed, you were fucked out. when you managed to collect your clothes and stagger out of his flat by mid-afternoon, you thought you made it in time to the pharmacy to get emergency plan b.

you prayed, and you never prayed. you promised three versions of 'god' that you'd convert to their religion if the pill worked. but three deities failed you and a month later price was in your apartment with his hands on the plastic pregnancy test. he scratched his beard and looked at you. he tried so hard to put on his best acting face. "that's a real shame, baby girl." he said in that rough voice of his that got you in trouble in the first place. he leaned back a little in your kitchen chair and placed the test back down on the table, "always wanted to be a father." he frowned a little bit, "never got the chance too. they said when i retired that the chances were low of me havin' a baby..." he looked at you. you should've known he was lying. his swimmers obviously weren't shot by how easily you got pregnant. you felt bad, almost like you were burdening him with getting pregnant. that it was your fault. you rung your hands and admitted softly, "we can try... we can make a family." and price smiled, "oh, doll." then got up to embrace you. you sniffled and cried a little in his strong chest. he held you in his strong arms. he was your protector even though his cock was straining in his jeans at the knowledge that he fundamentally changed you.

your body, your life, everything. when he released you from the hug, he got down on his knees. made a point to make a small 'huff' noise from being down on his 'bad' knee before he pushed up your t-shirt and pressed a kiss against your stomach. he said to you, "don't worry, love. daddy'll take care of ya." then gave that smile that wrapped around you like a vice. <3

[eudaimaniacs]

cherry (old! logan howlett x female reader)

character/universe: logan howlett/wolverine (x-men/marvel)

word count: 1.7k words

warning/s: full-on smut (minors, dni). loss of virginity and age gap

notes: i have a headache from swimming yesterday but still managed to finish this in a day (so it's not proofread). i have tons of requirements to do so i may do an occasional small imagine once in a while. anyways, enjoy!

You started dating Logan six months ago, and when the conversation about sex came up, you shamefully admitted that you're still a virgin. You didn't want to look like a little girl to the older man since you knew that he had dated and slept with numerous women in the past. When you let out those three words of truth, you expected him to break up with you. However, Logan smirked and remarked how he hadn't fucked a virgin for a long time.

So, it was a matter of waiting for you to lose your virginity to Logan.

You went to your close friends for sex advice. They weren't experienced with the topic but teased that you're going to fuck an old, attractive man. With a few good luck, you readied yourself for the day Logan will take your virginity. You didn't bother searching online since watching porn made you cringe. Additionally, the boys you dated were either clueless or too eager only fuck you. Logan wasn't like them; he cared and didn't date you because you were innocent and pretty.

One night, when you stayed at Logan's house, you decided to lose your virginity finally. You wore a white lace-trimmed tank top with black pajama shorts. You used the cherry lipgloss you bought for this occasion to make the night extra special. Logan donned the wifebeater tank top you loved. His salt-and-pepper hair and beard made him extra sexy, or maybe it was the age gap.

You two cuddled on the queen-sized bed you cleaned before this night. The softness of the pillows and the blankets didn't lessen your anxiety. With you touching his chest and Logan snaking his hand around your waist, you waited for the opportunity to bring up the conversation about sex again.

"Logan, honey? I have something to ask you," you whispered as you scratched his chin.

The older man hummed in agreement as he waited for your question.

Finding the right words, you blurted out, "Are you ready to have sex with me tonight?" With wide eyes and a beating heart, you hoped Logan wouldn't notice your nervousness.

He chuckled and kissed your cheek. Logan remarked, "I'm ready when you are, princess."

Your gaze softened as Logan agreed to have sex with you. However, it dawned on you that you didn't know how to start. Were you supposed to pleasure Logan first, or is he the one who should do it first? Should you take off your clothes when does it too? Who goes first? Who comes second? Your mind raced with the inexperience you didn't bother to fix.

"What's the matter, [Y/N]?" Logan noticed that you weren't taking action. You didn't want to admit you didn't know what to do. What if Logan wasn't attracted to your inexperience? What if he hated how awkward you are at initiating sex?

You took a deep breath before admitting to Logan, "I'm n-not too s-s-sure what to do, Logan. I tried to, you know, do my research about sex. S-so I'm sorry if I seem to be aw-"

Logan cut you off before finishing to tell him the truth. He sat up and rested on the headboard. The older man commanded you to take a seat on his lap. You quickly followed and rested your head on his chest. The beat of his heart assured you that Logan would be understanding about your anxiety about sex.

"It's okay, [Y/N]. You don't have to worry about having sex for the first time. I'm here to guide you. Remember when I told you how I hadn't fucked a virgin for a long time? I want your first time to be special, [Y/N]," Logan softly whispered as he caressed your back to relieve you.

You giggled and raised your head to kiss his neck gently. Logan chuckled at your sudden, playful attitude after assuring you everything would be okay. You pushed up your chest against his, and the older man seethed as he saw your breasts.

"Look at you now. You're now teasing me with your boobs. I thought you were nervous," Logan chuckled as he massaged your butt. You gave him a beck before replying, "Maybe you cast a spell on me, honey. I got a bit fired up with that sweet talk you did."

Logan lifted your chin and saw your glossy eyes accompanied by the cherry lipgloss. Your innocence, mixed with playfulness and the cute face and outfit you had, made Logan's heart race. He couldn't believe that you trusted him to be your first time. His rough, veiny hands caress your shoulder as he toys with the thin strap of your top. Your breath hitched up at the older man's soft and sensual action. You touched his chest to support yourself and felt your pussy wanting to be touched.

You slowly rubbed your clothed vagina on his black denim jeans as Logan went under your top to grope your breasts. You let out a shaky moan as you chased your high. Logan smirked as he saw your face contorting at the newfound pleasure.

"Let me do something, princess. Lay down for me," Logan grabbed your thighs, leading you to stop rubbing your pussy against his jeans. You were unsatisfied that he prevented you from chasing your climax. However, you were equally excited about what he would do next. You lay down on the bed as Logan told you and waited for his following action.

Logan kneeled at the end of the bed and asked, "May I take off your shorts, princess?" His rough hands caress the softness of your covered thighs. You slowly nodded, not wanting to keep Logan waiting for your response. He chuckled and reassured you that he would always be patient with you. You felt Logan sliding off your black pajama shorts, and you lifted your legs for him to take it off easier. The older man sucked his teeth as the sight of your lacy pink panties appeared.

Your heart was beating fast since you were one undergarment away from exposing your pussy. Logan pushed the fabric to the side and smelled your arousal. Sweet. He slowly circled your clit and licked your pussy to taste you. Logan moaned as he ate you; he wanted to do it fast as he had never tasted a virgin pussy before. However, knowing this was your first time, he took it slow. Your eyes rolled back at the sensation of Logan's tongue pleasuring you. You grabbed the bedsheets and screamed his name.

As you felt your stomach twisting, Logan stopped and wiped his lips coated with your arousal. You curved your eyebrows in disappointment as Logan continued teasing you. You whined about how he should stop it and remarked that you wanted to orgasm badly. Logan grabbed the hem of your tank top, telling you to take them off. He fondled your breasts and kissed you.

Logan shushed you and whispered, "I'm only prepping you, princess. I'm now going to give you the real thing." He stood up and unbuckled his belt for his massive penis to escape. You gasped at the length of it. How is it going to fit you? You were both hungry and scared of the enormous cock staring at you.

"Don't worry, [Y/N]. I'll take it slow, and you tell me if I need to take it out. Got it, princess?" Logan stared at your lust-filled eyes, waiting for your approval. You whispered a soft yes as you braced yourself for his length to push in. Logan grabbed your hips as he slowly entered inside of you. Your eyes suddenly opened at the foreign sensation penetrating you.

You let out a few tears but remained strong as you didn't want to embarrass yourself by tapping out. Logan saw it and whispered, "[Y/N], are you okay? Do I need to take it out?"

You shook your head and responded, "I'm okay, Lo. I need to adjust a bit to your length." Logan heartily chuckled as he rested his head beside your neck. You hugged his back and waited for the pain to subside. Taking a deep breath, you let out a small moan, signaling Logan to pick up the pace.

Logan started to thrust slowly and made sure that you weren't crying because of the pain. He lifted himself and pounded you. You grabbed his chest as you felt the shape of his dick molding your pussy. You screamed his name and told him how good it felt. Logan saw your bouncing tits and squeezed them.

"Lo-Logan, please kiss me. P-please, I need you to kiss me," you panted as you grasped the sheets. Logan leaned in to passionately kiss you. He tasted the sweetness of cherry lipgloss and let his tongue in. You scratch his back as you feel your high coming.

"I'm a-about to-fuck. I'm cumming, Logan!" You screamed as the older man quickened his pace to reach his high, too. You cried out pleasure as you felt his dick growing inside of you.

Logan hungrily kissed your neck and groaned at the sensation of your tightness. He went wild as he sensed his orgasm chasing him. You grabbed his hair to brace yourself from the immense pleasure coming.

"Let go, princess. Fuck, I'm close too. Come on, princess. Cum for me," Logan moaned as he quickly pounded for the two of you to release. You felt a wave of pleasure crashing over you as Logan did one effective thrust. You screamed out his name as your legs went numb at the pleasure.

Logan stayed inside of you as he released his cum inside of you. He pulled out to see the sheets stained with blood and your once-virgin pussy leaking with his cum. The older man kissed your forehead and grabbed a towel at your dresser to clean you up.

"How was it, princess? Was it good?" Logan asked as he gently wiped your thighs. You sat and rested your head on the board to look at him better.

You giggled and replied, "That was the best, Logan. I couldn't have asked for anything better." He softly grinned and leaned in to give you a soft, deep kiss. Logan savored the sweet taste of the cherry lipgloss. You hummed as he continued kissing you. And as the night became darker, the two of you slept soundly as the imprint of your gloss and virginity marked Logan and his warm cum filling you.

eudaimaniacs - 2024

[bethanydelleman]

I really want to talk about this paragraph from the Pride & Prejudice epilogue:

Lady Catherine was extremely indignant on the marriage of her nephew; and as she gave way to all the genuine frankness of her character, in her reply to the letter which announced its arrangement, she sent him language so very abusive, especially of Elizabeth, that for some time all intercourse was at an end. But at length, by Elizabeth’s persuasion, he was prevailed on to overlook the offence, and seek a reconciliation; and, after a little further resistance on the part of his aunt, her resentment gave way, either to her affection for him, or her curiosity to see how his wife conducted herself; and she condescended to wait on them at Pemberley, in spite of that pollution which its woods had received, not merely from the presence of such a mistress, but the visits of her uncle and aunt from the city.

I feel like a lot is made of women's unpaid labour in some domains (childcare, nursing the sick, cleaning etc) but we don't spend enough time talking about how maintaining social connections, with family and society, is also usually the work of women. This may be for many reasons, because it's not supposed to be work but pleasure, or because it's written off as just women gossiping, but it is work and it takes time and energy. It's also vitally important, maintaining social connections is what keeps you alive when times get tough but also what makes life worth living. These relationships will die without maintenance. The person writing letters, arranging holiday get-togethers, and smoothing over arguments is usually female.

Some readers hate this part, they want Elizabeth to Girlboss all over Lady Catherine and her snobby ways, but what does that accomplish? This is part of Mrs. Elizabeth Darcy's job, to do what she can to maintain family harmony. For better or worse, Lady Catherine is her husband's aunt, and burning a bridge is a big deal. I admire Elizabeth for putting aside her own feelings and moving towards reconciliation.

[alatismeni-theitsa]

In "KAOS" nothing is anything, and everything is wrong

Two disclaimers: I am no stranger to modern art, and I have no issue with queerness in shows, or in my own mythology (I'm Greek). I am also aware that KAOS is a comedy. It's in the gutter of British comedy, but still part of the genre. At least I laughed every time they said "Oh God!". I don't believe this is the same person who wrote the great and amusing "End of the F**king World"! The premise of "The gods in our modern world" appeals to me a lot, so that wasn't my problem either. My general issue with KAOS is its horrible delivery, bad writing, and piss-poor Greek representation.

This is gonna be long and full of stupid gifs, so sit comfortably, grab a coffee or some popcorn and... pame!

The "ILoveGreekMythology" Kid

Art without context is just a pretty thing to look at. Most of the time, this context can be found within the art piece itself, as the artist has taken care to weave it in. KAOS refuses to connect itself to any context besides the names and a few vague powers. It aims to exist outside of those "boring old stories of the Greek myth" and be entirely "fresh and modern". Something impossible when the entire show and the meanings are based on ancient recorded material. In other words, KAOS is so meta that it ends up being nothing. KAOS cannot stand on its own because you need more than the viewers being familiar with the Greek myth basics to pull such a show off.

KAOS tells us "See? I know all the names of the gods, and what they did, and I know all the locations, so I am qualified to tackle this". More or less like any Western kid who takes all their knowledge from PJO and Marvel and proceeds to unironically hate ancient deities and make a girlboss out of Medusa.

Here's a Greek word for you guys, ημιμάθεια, meaning "half-knowledge". Α Greek saying very well declares "Half-knowledge is worse than no knowledge". The confidence of thinking you know enough often leads you to grave mistakes whereas the humility of not knowing prevents you from touching shit that you shouldn't. When you have no idea what the original myth is trying to say and spit on its meaning, knowing a few names and locations is just smoke and mirrors. I don't believe the audience fell for that.

And don't get me started on the "subversions". A good subversion is intriguing and thought-provoking. In KAOS, every twist was hollow - Greek myth related or otherwise.

"What if Euridice doesn't love Orpheus?" I don't know, babe. What if??? What was the point of that? What did you show us? That women's stories are dominated by men and men don't listen to women, perhaps? And you chose to twist... the love story of Orpheus and Euridice to show this?? One of the best and most tragic love stories Greek mythology has to offer?? You just mocked the myth, you didn't make anything profound out of it.

The Greek Stuff (Nothing salvageable)

I was surprised to see they had a Consulting Producer (Georgia Christou) and an Assistant Script Editor (Isabella Yianni) who happen to be Greek. And I stress that because those people probably weren't hired or utilized for being Greek. We are not sure they were involved in cultural decisions because we have no evidence and because shows with no Greek elements can have more Greeks than that on their staff.

Okay, perhaps they took 5 seconds to ask Isabella about a greeting - which they proceeded to say in a wrong intonation 🙄🤌It's where Poseidon says "ya sás" in the Fates, by the way. How he said it sounds more like "for you (pl.)" than "health to you (pl.)".

Surprise! The only Greek actor present (Peter Polycarpou) has less than 5 minutes of screen time and plays the caricature of an immigrant with a thick (and inaccurate Greek) accent. He has a canteen, selling falafel which is not Greek, and Dionysus buys from him an unidentified tortilla wrap (which... is also not Greek, if you haven't caught up).

For the show they brought in actors of Maori, Nigerian and Sierra Leonean, Pakistani, Black American, Latvian-Jewish, Iranian, Egyptian, Indo-Fijian and Malay descent and you tell me it was impossible for them to seek and find an English-speaking, skilled actor of Greek descent in a show regarding Greek heritage. Sometimes I wonder, do y'all hate us so much?

They considered Greeks only to give us a simple (and wrong) greeting and a stereotype. Crumbs, we are supposed to be happy with. By the way, there are over 70.000 Greek immigrants just in the UK, usually in the urban centers, many of them students or fairly young employees in the corporate workforce. Not the largest minority but not hard to spot either.

Another plague of Anglophone shows: Almost everyone's Greek name is shortened. Yes, we know their full names but we are told that we will use the short ones. Greeks and their "long and difficult" names am I right fellas? Because saying "Ariadne" apparently requires 5 years of Greek language training, and no English word ever has more than two syllables.

Coincidentally, short names are cool in Anglophone imaginary universes and the "long" names are not. it's so strange Anglophones never make universes where it's cool for Greek names to be spoken in full hmmm... They don't even want to practice saying a whole Greek name for just 2 minutes in preparation for a show full of Greek names. And don't give me that "Greek is hard" shit when we only talk about a few syllables. If Greek kids can learn English since first grade and people here can sing English songs and spell English names, you have no excuse.

They also said the name "Fotis" means light, which is close enough but... ugh.. It's like saying Sebastian means "respect". I am not sure if they asked anyone or what their research was here. If I had the writers in front of me, I'd be like:

(This character from an all-time favorite Greek show is called Fotis)

They also made the flag of "Krete" an alteration of the Greek flag and the local Cretan flag. Which is the stupidest move, because they had to remove the religious symbol of the cross to make the flag fit the universe. These are flags created based on 1) Christianity 2) the Greek Revolution of 1821.

National Greek flag to the left, local Cretan flag to the right:

Flag of the KAOS' "Krete":

The only time they seriously took into account anything Greek, was the time when they decided to remove the religious symbol of our ethnoreligion AND (from what I could observe) keep the nine stripes?? The nine stripes of our national flag represent the syllables in "Freedom or Death". The colors are from the white foustanela of the mainland attire and the dark blue vraka of the island attire, the clothing of the Revolution fighters. (That's more of a meta explanation but the characteristics of the flag were decided during and nearly after the Revolution.)

I think I don't have to explain it more but it's not a homage to put the nine stripes in an ancient era where they have no meaning, and to replace a cross??? Let's... not replace religious symbols on national flags, okay? Thank you.

Another cultural element they changed was making everyone have a dedicated coin to pay Charon. Orpheus has Euridice's coin, "her coin", and he's meant to put it on her before she got buried. In Greek culture, any coin would do. Sorry that our culture restricts your script, dear writers. I guess you had to bend this too, in order to create a cohesive plot with a semblance of a twist.

Finally, the many "Kerberus" dogs were cute and I can understand the creative decision behind that. However, in a show full of inaccuracies, this made me roll my eyes a little. I think the showrunners know that Kerveros is not a breed of dog, and there can only be one of him because he doesn't have any other "Kerveros" to breed with. On the other hand, as demonstrated from art/writing on the internet, quite a lot of Westerners are not exactly aware of how our monsters work, so forgive my uncertainty 😅

Nothing is Anything

Every element KAOS played with ended up meaningless. In the words of a Lifo article:

“Zeus is a paranoid authoritarian dictator in mid-life crisis who fears losing his power and murders his aides to vent. Hera is a promiscuous goddess who repeatedly betrays Zeus and has mutilated mute priestesses for protection. Dionysos is a spoiled and immature zoomer who, apart from pranks, indulges in orgies with all genders. Poseidon a sadistic god of the sea, who tortures the crew on his ship for fun. Prometheus is gay and killed his lover so he could overthrow Zeus. Orpheus is a famous pop singer and Eurydice does not love him. Theseus is black and gay. The Erinyes are tough-as-nails mechs that look like they stepped out of ‘Sons of Anarchy’. The Fates resemble a three-member jury in a talent show. The Trojans are a terrorist group that acts against the gods. Crete is more reminiscent of California than the Mediterranean.”

The "River Styx" is a sea, the "River Lethe" is a lake, the gods are nothing more than spoiled humans, the Moirai are drag queens, the Cave is a club where you have to take a quiz to enter the underworld, and generally everything is modern, flat, mundane and anticlimactic. The producers aimed to achieve a work so meta that a "river" is now a concept, a metaphor, whatever you have in your heart. And those who want to see a river when we speak of a river are probably uncultured swines and don't understand postmodernism. Never mind that rivers are rivers in Greek mythology for a reason. That's not culturally interesting enough to explore compared to the new, cool approach of not assigning meaning to anything. That totally shows love for the original rich and meaningful material...

And the reason behind all this subversion? Probably the shock factor. They brought the characters to a point where they said "We have to save the world from Zeus" - Zeus! The father of gods, heroes and humans! - just because they could. It gives off a certain type of smugness that I personally don't like. I mean, I would like the smugness and cheekiness of KAOS if it wasn't a vapid and practically meaningless show. As nothing symbolizes anything anymore, we are just led from hollow plot point to hollow plot point.

If you cut it out of any cultural influence and see it as a story then it's... okay, I guess. But when you consider that it's meant to derive from certain material and it fails spectacularly, it's not a good story. It forgets its bases and doesn't play with the ancient elements at all. Disney's Hercules did it better, FFS!

Bad Writing (pt.1)

KAOS is not without recognizable themes but their demonstration is so juvenile and heavy-handed that it fails to influence a viewer of average intelligence. For instance, "Riddy" says to her religious mother "You dedicated your whole life to Hera, what about me?" Okay, KAOS, we get it. At the same time, this theme nulls itself because it turns out that Ridy's mother was right to do what she did, as she had a greater goal in mind. (And this, kiddos, is called Bad Writing, because your themes and scenes contradict each other)

The biggest theme I spotted was a criticism of religion and religious people who say "Do as I say, not as I do" and create exceptions for themselves. Only, it's not a criticism of anything real, in this case. It's a fact that some people in the clergy tend to preach peace and love and then they do harm, but we don't know, for example, that The Goddess of Marriage is a cheater and yet she pressures everyone into strict marriages. By focusing their wrath on divine beings who are not known for their hypocrisy, the creators missed the mark.

I can give KAOS props for how it handled Trojans to reflect real issues regarding how immigrants and war refugees are mistreated and blamed. I'd argue it was the only (nearly) well-done theme in the whole show because it had the least on-the-nose delivery and some genuine/serious scenes. But that's it.

More Bad Writing!

Jeff Goldblum's Zeus is shit. He'd crap his pants in an argument with a stern Greek dad/uncle his age. Is this character supposed to be intimidating? (Laughs in Mediterranean) That's not to say that Goldblum is not a good actor, but this role wasn't for him. The same can be said for the other actors, too. They are competent but they only give off the air of "The Greek gods if they lived in London, from the minds of people who think beards and body hair are an affliction". In addition to being misplaced, the actors cannot show their talent when following a script that resembles a children's book.

Why does THE GOD Dionysus have the maturity of a 15-year-old? I repeat, The God Dionysus. He's a freaking deity, and a very old one at that. He is not a teenager neither in appearance nor in experience. In our culture, he is mystical, mighty, wise. Why did they downgrade him so? Just for the plot? This is not Dionysus just because you named him so.

The dialogue rarely takes itself seriously to the point it has you wondering at times "Do people talk and behave like that?". In a comedy where everything is meant to be already extreme and parodied. Even in comedies, something must occasionally be serious so there is a healthy fluctuation in tone and the funny moments can hit you. In KAOS very few scenes treated their impactful dialogue as it should be treated.

The queerness and diversity (good elements, in general) were worse off for being in KAOS. Like, I want these elements to be there. I'm just sad about the whole situation. It's not enough that the show is shit, now you also give an additional reason for conservatives to shit on diverse and queer characters because they are part of a stupid narrative.

I'm the type of person who doesn't mind the queerness of Astyanax and Theseus being lovers in the context of this specific show but they're still the oddest pairing to me because they're from the most irrelevant myths and eras. Also, Astyanax in my mind is a baby who died tragically, for little reason if we are honest, so to bring him back and make him a love interest is... ekh.

In addition, isn't Astyanax supposed to be crippled after a fall from the city walls when he was a baby? Sorry to change subjects but the show is so convoluted and with so many issues that it's extremely difficult to stay on track with what's wrong.

To the person who thought this show was a good idea:

Whatever. Bye. I'm fucking done.

[cvpidzcvrse]

Nah, I'm Better.

divider by @cafekitsune

✦A/N: OK! this took longer than expected but LISTEN! I'm here now and probably will be dropping more frequently (hopefully). Reader is also a slut I mean she could talk me through it and I'd let her. But I tried to eat down as much as possible for this fic so the girlies and the gays wouldn't starve. Gojo is driving my dream car, a girl can only imagine.

⋆.ೃ࿔*･Synopsis: You and Satoru have been best friends since elementary school. By the time you both made it to college he’s hated every single partner you’ve ever had. Your recent ex isn’t any different, but he’s doing something about it this time.

⋆.ೃ࿔*･wc: 2,886

⋆.ೃ࿔*Warnings: best friends to lovers, praise, car sex, arguments (ish), cowgirl, choking, handjob, p in v, no protection, finishing inside (practice safe sex)

(the reader is black)

If you had a dollar for every time you and Satoru got mistaken for a couple you’d be rich, not richer than him. He loves it when people mistake him for your boyfriend. It’s the ego boost he doesn’t need. He’s liked you for a while but you always shut him down. Either for another guy or because you see him as just a “friend”. You knew that was a lie, you didn’t want to ruin the friendship between you guys. So to buried your feelings for Satoru and used other men as a distraction. Fuck buddies, friends with benefits, sugar daddies, you name it. Nothing was ever successful; it always ended in heartbreak or fights. Satoru hated that you went for men who were lower than your standard.

He hated that you didn’t go for him. That’s part of the reason why he’s parked outside a fancy restaurant waiting for you to walk out.  

You thought this guy was the one, you’d been talking for a couple weeks, going on dates, even fucked a few times. But no people always have to ruin it, it was fun while it lasted. Mahito was a guy you met off of Tinder. He was nice, sweet, and probably the realest guy you’ve ever met. That was until date number four when he brought up his love for podcasts. Specifically a podcast by the name ‘Fresh and Fit’, you know the podcast that goes around and hates on women for a check. 

What a loser…

After learning that information you left the date immediately. Leaving him with a “Get a life, nigga.” before quickly walking out of the restaurant. The cold drizzle of rain calms your nerves as you heave out a soft sigh. Your eyes meet a familiar and sleek all-black Ford Bronco. An air of comfort travels throughout your body. You haven’t been this excited to see Satoru since…ever. He’s already looking in your direction with his cheeky smile, flashing you his pearly white teeth. He’s always been handsome, your whole life was spent watching girls and even guys swoon over him. You can’t even remember if he accepted any of the advances, you don’t even think he’s had a girlfriend that you know of.

His jagged blue eyes met your dark brown ones and it’s like a firework went off in front of you. Your waist-length knotless braids, glossy plump lips, and warm brown skin have him in a chokehold. The way your honey-glazed skin complimented your outfit made him want to rip it off right there. Luckily his windows are tinted enough to hide his very noticeable lustful gaze, but you felt his eyes burning holes into your head. With a visible frown on your face, you swiftly open the car door. You come face to face with Satoru’s fuck boy grin, you almost melt on the spot.

“When I said ‘call me for emergencies.’ It didn’t include shitty dates.”

You roll your eyes before playfully punching his arm. Satoru speeds out of the parking lot before you can even put your seatbelt on. Your back hits the seat roughly before you send a glare Satoru’s way.

“Chill out, nigga damn. You didn’t even hear how the date went and you’re already mad.”

“I’m mad because you didn’t listen to me. I told you not to trust that fucking loser, now look at where we are.”

You could hear his eyes rolling before you saw it. He’s the leader of the sassy man apocalypse and he never denies it. You grimaced at the undeniable truth that he was right, and you knew it. You cross your arms over your chest and gaze out at the widow districting yourself with the scenery. 

“Hey…look at me.”

His light-hearted voice quickly melted in your ears like honey. He softly gripped your chin and turned your face to his. He analyzed your expression for a moment. Admiring your features, planning your future, imagining his cock inside of you. He’s quickly brought out of his thoughts when you playfully push his hand away. 

“Hands off, this makeup took time.”

He scuffs at your statement before looking back at the busy road. You analyze him for a while, taking in his features. Your thoughts are more innocent than his, and you hope it stays that way. 

“Listen…I’m sorry I didn’t listen. But, niggas man you don’t understand. They’re all so annoying.”

The more you think about your past rendezvous the more it turned into torture. Satoru knew about every failed date. He was always there to be a shoulder to cry on and a dick to ride if you asked him. He knows very well about your tragic love life, he doesn’t remember a successful relationship you’ve been in. He lectured you every time he picked you up from a bad date or situationship ending in ‘So, what are we?’. He wasn’t upset with you, he was more upset that you refused to see his obvious feelings for you. 

“This is just starting to get repetitive. (✧), This is just...nevermind”

He smacked his lips at the end of his statement. A habit he picked up from you after all of the years you two have spent together. His mouth opens to say something else but nothing comes out. He huffs and runs his hand through his hair, he’s frustrated by the current events.

“Don’t get an attitude with me. You think I want to date guys like this?”

Your accusatory tone makes his attention shift slightly from the road. He scans his brain for what to say. He doesn’t want to upset you anymore but he also didn’t want to sugarcoat anything. As a wannabe lover, he wants nothing but the best for you even if it means telling you a harsh reality. 

Your taste in men is shit. 

He doesn’t have enough fingers or toes to list off the amount of guys that hurt you in the past. Nanami was too formal for you, Toji was a bum that leeched off of you, Sukuna was an asshole, and Satoru would’ve killed Suguru if he even attempted to flirt with you. 

“No, you know what I mean. You deserve better than these dumbasses you go after.”

The venom in his voice is very noticeable. Satoru’s carefree nature is cracking under the stress of your love life. Your stubborn nature refuses to let you back down to him, especially when he’s like this. 

“Toru’ I can date and fuck who I want! I don’t need to be lectured by you. I understand that you care, but let me live my life.”

Your response almost sent Satoru out of the car. His eyes twitched in annoyance and his knuckles turned white from gripping the steering wheel. You watch the way his jaw tightened and his muscles flexed. It turned you on, a lot. As much as you hate to admit it, you looove making him mad. It was just the way his relaxed facade melted away when you threw careless sentences at him. His foot softly pressed on the brake when coming to a red light. He slowly shifted his body to face you, if looks could fuck he’d be fucking you right now. Just the thought of him bending you over the center console had your clit aching. 

“Do not say that, I will crash this car right now and kill us both.”

He glanced at you with a smirk trying to lighten the melancholy-stricken mood. You scuff at his childish antics.

“Oh my god, be for real-”

Ring…

Your phone buzzed in your purse, and your soon-to-be lecture got cut short. Your eyes widened when you saw the caller I.D. read ‘Mahito’. You let it ring for a few seconds before finally answering it. 

“Why are you calling me? I told you we were over.”

Satoru's ears perked when he heard the hostility in your voice. There was a snarky voice on the other end and they were loudly throwing a fit. His eyes analyzed your expression and the way your calmness was replaced with annoyance. 

“You don’t think I can do better than you?…You’re one goofy ass nigga, you know that?…Whatever, fuck you!”

You harshly shoved your phone into your purse and groaned. The awkward silence was almost tangible; you would have to cut it with a chainsaw. Mahito’s words circled in your head and it pissed you off more and more. Who does he think he is? You hum slightly when a very filthy idea comes to your mind. 

“Satoru, I need you to take me somewhere.”

｡.｡:∞♡*

“Why the fuck are we here? Please don’t tell me you’re about to do something stupid.”

Satoru’s tone is laced with worry and confusion. He has no clue why he was parked outside of Mahito’s house right now and he didn’t know why you wanted to come here. You give him a cheeky smile before unbuckling your seatbelt and slowly leaning over the center console. You’re incredibly close to Satoru’s face, your nose practically touching his. All you can do is stare sensually into his ice-blue eyes, but the sense of longing is undeniably visible. 

“What are you doing?”

His voice spills out lowly like silk touching your ears. You take in a breath before crashing your lips into his. He’s caught by surprise but that’s quickly replaced with lust. His veiny hands quickly trace every curve on your body and tangle his fingers in your braids. You pull away taking in the wonderful scenery that Satoru was turned into. His cheeks are flushed and his hair is messy. You both stare at each other in awe and affection. It’s like something was unlocked in the middle of this little plan of revenge. 

“Get in the back.”

You nod before watching him walk out and around as you climb in the back. He opens the back door and stares at you for a moment, taking in the way your skirt is hiked up and your shirt tousled around. He quickly gets in and closes the door, basically pouncing on you. His mouth attacks your neck quickly, leaving several bite marks and hickeys. Without breaking the kiss you roughly pushed him onto the car door behind him. He lets out a low groan and rests his hands on your waist. You reach down and fumble with his belt buckle before finally breaking the kiss and using your hands. 

“If you need help you could’ve just asked.”

“Shut up.”

He chokes out a gasp when you take his cock out of his boxers. You wrap your manicured hand around his big cock and slowly massage the length. You trace circles around his tip with your thumb. A low groan settles at the bottom of his throat as silence sighs escape his lips. He unscrewed his eyes to meet the brazen expression on your face. His chuckles and mixed moans are sending you over the edge. You reach down and caress your clit through your panties. Satoru doesn’t fall ignorant of this and quickly grabs your hand to stop the satisfying motion.

“Suck it, I want your mouth.”

He let out a low chuckle as you took his full length into your mouth. You let out a whine as the tip of his cock touched the back of your throat. Satoru’s head flew back in pleasure as his hand rested comfortably on top of your head. He can sense your greed from the way your tongue moves along his tip. He sighed out a moan and softly pushed your head down further. 

“F-fuck…you’re doing so well.”

He stifles a throaty moan with his free hand and laces his hands in your hair. You were quick to grab his wrist and yank his hand away. You trailed soft kisses up the length of his cock, from base to tip. 

“I wanna hear you, pretty boy. Let me hear you.”

Your voice was soothing and soft it probably could’ve put him to sleep if it weren’t for the current circumstances. He melted at your command and quickly left his hand to the side. You tease his leaking tip with your tongue before putting it all in your mouth again. His mouth goes agape as slutty moans spill out and his hands grip your hair tightly. The way your head is bobbing up and down on his cock has his mind going blank. His cock twitches in your mouth before he quickly shoves your head away.

“I don’t want to cum yet. C’mon get on top, ride what’s yours.”

You swiftly straddle his lap and he pushes your panties to the side. You wrap your arms around him as he slowly pushes you on his hard cock. You let a soft moan and tug at Satoru’s hair. He moans in response and pushes you down deeper.

“Shit…fuck me, c’mon.”

His mouth is hovering over your ear and his voice is low and seductive. You slowly start to rock your hips and grind on his cock. After adjusting to his size you messily start bouncing on his cock. Strings of curses spew out of his mouth and his grip on your waist gets tighter. 

“Like this baby? Mmph…you’re so big.”

The constant praise is making the blood rush to his face. He hides his blushing face in your shoulder and leaves several bite marks. The car windows turn foggy and the only thing illuminating the car is the moonlight. Satoru’s moans can probably be heard from blocks away. His hands are under your sweater groping and squeezing your plush breast. His fingers pull and twist at your nipples as your pace gets messy. 

“Give me your hand…”

His voice is carnal and vibrating in your ear. It makes your clit twitch and your tempo stagger. You untangle your hand from his hair and place your hand in his. He takes two of your fingers and places them in his mouth. He doesn’t break eye contact, he’s just looking at you like a meal waiting to be devoured. He slowly sucks them and swirls his tongue around them. The scene in front of you is so sensual and slow, you’ve never experienced something so intimate before. He slowly pulls your fingers out of his as a saliva trail is the only thing left behind.

“Play with your clit for me. I wanna watch while you bounce on my cock.”

His voice moves like velvet through your body. It’s like he’s talking right to your pussy and she’s answering very loudly. The moment your hand reaches your clit Satoru plunges his cock into you. His thrust gets more violent and his large cock attacks your cervix. Your head dips back in pleasure in the constant assault on your insides. 

He’s starting to unravel like a present. His strokes get messier, sweet liquid spilling everywhere, his moans getting louder and more frequent. His nail prints are embedded on your love handles and your thighs are a wet mess. 

“Fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me. C’mon baby you can do it.”

His pleading sends shivers down your spine. You’ve never seen him so desperate before, it was empowering that your pussy brought him down a few notches. His pussy drunk stare is intoxicating to look at. The way he’s looking at you with his eyes half-lidded with nothing but lust in them. There was something about the way he looked at you; it wasn't just lust. It was like you were a necessity to him, he needed you.

“Mmph…baby I’m ‘bouta cum!”

“Cum for me, you’d make me so proud. Cum on my cock princess.”

Satoru replaced your hand with his and traced circles on your clit. With his hand working its magic and his cock peppering kisses on your cervix sends you crazy. The car is rocking very noticeably but you could care less. Your climax crashes onto you like a brick. Your juices spill all over his thick cock and coat his length in a slippery mess. His warm and sticky ropes decorate your insides, leaving his pants soaked and a wet ring around the base of his cock.

“That’s it, I’m so proud of you baby.”

 He tenderly pulls out and holds you tight to him, taking in the moment. You rest your forehead on his shoulder, you both desperately trying to catch whatever air is left in your lungs. You hear Satoru chuckle slowly while tracing kisses on your neck. 

“What’s so funny? Did my pussy make you delirious or what?” 

He shakes his head and lifts your head softly and turns it towards the window. While swallowed by lust you didn’t notice Satoru rolled the window down. Mahito is staring in awe and anger; he looks like he is about to explode. Satoru’s chuckle turns into a full-blown cackle as he glances at Mahito, sending him that cheeky smile that you love so much. You join Satoru in his joyous laughter before reaching over and rolling up the window.

“At least my plan worked. Let’s do it again but this time with handcuffs.” 

[purple-dreams9]

If Thea was Theo, a controversial opinion

I want to preface this post by stating that this is not meant to change anyone's mind or opinion. I am not here to tell you to like a character or to ship a certain ship. You are free to hate Thea, write her off your fics, ignore her existence, and ship Kevin with the milkman if you so desire. This is also not an essay. Instead, think of it as the thought dump of someone munching over it for days.

This all started with a conversation about Thea with a couple people on a Discord server. I've been mostly neutral about Thea, not understanding the overall hate but not knowing much about her either. It led me to read Nora's most recent post about Thea, the replies and the "Why do you not like Thea?" poll, and I've seen plenty of Tweets about her, too.

In general, I noticed one main element when people explain their stance: it is not because Thea is a woman and people want to ship Kevin with male characters. The real reason(s), branched in different directions: the age gap, the lack of building of her character, how little she shows up/how little we know about her/the feeling of her being shoo-ed in out of nowhere as Kevin's love interest, and her attitude (inc. her lack for communication with Kevin after he left the Nest, her comment to Jean in TSC, etc.)

I have been in many fandoms for over a decade, some with more prominent mlm ships, and to be honest, none of those reasons seemed to truly justify the dislike of Thea to the degree she is disliked in the fandom as a whole, especially as the romantic interest of a main character. It seemed to me that most of it is rooted in the desire for Kevin NOT to be straight, but to be gay and be with a guy (or bi, but I see more people using "gay" for Kevin. And some prefer Aro/Ace Kevin, but these fans are a bit more quiet and subdued with their headcanon.) See, even taking Thea out of the equation, there are no popular mlw ships for Kevin with characters from canon, and even in fanon ships the counterparts are mostly (if not all) men.

That got me thinking: "What if Thea was Theo? How would that change how fans interact with this character, even if her personality was the same? What about the relationship with Kevin? Would fans approach the ship differently if he had had Theo as a boyfriend instead of Thea as a girlfriend?"

Of course, it is all hypothetical. For one, a big part of her character is that she is a woman of color (note that I am not black, so I am in no position to talk about how her race plays out with her character) in a predominately male and white team (violent cult) that had to fight her way to the top. It wouldn't quite have the same weight or the same background if she was a male. For two, I am aware it would bring another discourse to the table, that of the "predatory gay men stereotype" (even though there was nothing predatory or "grooming" in their relationship, but that conversation is not for this post.) I am sure plenty of fans would still hate the Kevin/Theo ship, and Theo himself.

Still, I allowed myself to picture it. I read, once, that women used to ship male characters together because female characters were underdeveloped and were not interesting. I wondered if this applies to fandom as well, how certain fandoms prefer to develop and grow male characters.

Things like "lack of canon information about Theo" would not be an issue. Fans are very good at filling in the blanks and building a character from the few spare parts given by the source. This also applies to "there is almost no interaction with Kevin" because let's be honest here, guys, ships are sometimes made from nothing. Rarepairs exist, and even ships like pre-TSC Jerejean can explode in popularity.

With how big of a part Kevin plays in the books and how big his shipping fandom is, if Theo was a thing, I truly believe we would have seen him bloom in fanon spaces. He would have given space and opportunity to grow, change and develop both as a character and in his relationship with Kevin.

The "forbidden relationship" trope and the possibility for angst would have fans foaming, fics working around Theo's past and how he had to fight his way to the top would be written, AUs where he leaves the beliefs of the cult behind and reunites with Kevin would also exist. We would see stories about how his and Kevin's love story played out before and after Kevin left the Nest (at least one primarily focused on the notes they used to pass each other in secret). His mean comments and bitchiness would be ignored, played down, understood, forgiven, or found charming (like Andrew's throughout the series, or even Abby's in TSC.) In a few words, he would be more present and less disliked.

AFTG is a predominately queer fandom, and there is nothing wrong with wanting representation, but I also think it's necessary to use the same scale for female and male characters that are romantically or sexually involved with more popular ones. It's fine not to like Thea, but also to sit and think: would I asses a male character in the same way? How would my view of them change regarding their gender? Just food for thought, I guess.

Again, this is not a call to action of any sort. It is just me, rambling and putting my thoughts down. I can't see different realities so this is basically all fiction. I wanted to take it out of my brain, hear what others think and that's it. Ship what makes you happy. Create what inspires you. Curate your experience. All that being said, Id love to hear your thoughts, but I wont debate anyone's opinion because that's truly, not what Im seeking.

This got longer than I intended so I'll end this here. If you made it, thanks! I hope you have a nice day.

[cemeteryvalentine]

astro observations part 4 !!! ^____^

(specifically based off my family :3 pleaseee don't get offended at anything that doesn't resonate)

🗝️: one thing about a sag placement, they are gonna hang up FIRST !!! i swear, if anyone misses flip phones, it's a sag placement/dominant. i just know they miss snapping that phone shut in a petty manner LOL. my mom is a sag moon AND rising, and she'd call me and demand me to do something in such a bitchy tone and then hang up on me like girl who tf do u think u areee 😭😭😭😭 LMFAO. but honestly good for her, i love being petty like her.

like i swear i take after my mom because everytime she does that annoying hang up before i can respond thing, i call her again just to say a snarky remark, and hang up on her back!

🐇: i swear, virgo placements have no problem being the grossest people alive, but suddenly it's a problem when someone else does it :/// it's really annoying. my brother has a pigsty of a bedroom, doesn't wash his hand when he pisses unless i make him, and leaves his trash everywhere, but constantly gets on my sister for the same things 😭. like the calls coming from inside the house !!! i think basically, (some) virgos are like picky(?) with what areas they'd want clean. like they're only really comfortable with THEIR mess and no one else's.

🗝️: i love how pisces mercury communicate because it's like what the hel are u awn about 😭 in the NICEST way though :3 they're so kewl and interesting to talk to, plus they're so nice and understanding. maybe because they're water mercuries after all. speaking of, my favorite artist ever kurt cobain was a pisces mercury and it SHOWSSS. a lot of nirvana lyrics feel artistic and metaphoric, or just realllyyyy silly. liiike "angel left wing, right wing, broken wing. lack of iron and or sleeping" from milk it, one of my nirvana faves. and "i vomit C*M and DIARRHEA". like girl whatever that means !!!! (song, mexican seafood)

🐇: mars influence on the asc makes for prominent features. especially eyebrows. my brother has an aries rising and he has such a bad case of RBF. i swear he never looks happy 😭 his virgo sun and cap moon definitely don't help at all either. then im a mars rising and i have big eyebrows like my brother. like we're the only ones with big eyebrows, while our parents brows look invisible LOL. also i'm a virgo rising !! and ppl are always saying i look mad which honestly pisses me off :P so in conclusion, mars influence + virgo placements = major rbf

🗝️: i HATE to add on to the cancer hate train since i'm one myself and i loveee being one + we get soo much hate, but i feel a (unevolvled) cancer makes for the worst pick me girl ever !!!! this def doesn't apply to all cancers, but the few cancer women i know can be so mean to other women so unprovoked. especially my mom, it gives me the ick when she calls random women b*tches or makes fun of them to me for their features or success or soemthing. i used to be a pick me too up until i was like 13 (im soooo happy i grew out of that mess QUICK!). i would constantly strive for male attention, it was embarrassing 😭. ik another girl who values her shitty boyfriend over her (girl) friends and i haaate it. like ive only known a few cancer women, but a lot of them are like the meanest pick me bitch ever, or such a sweeet, caring soul :). i feel like being a pick me stems from cancers being feminine AND traditional. yk? i pray i make sense, but yk how it's traditional for girls to be perfect for her man, and value him no matter the circumstance ?? and cancer/moon being **traditional** ? yeahhh 😭

anywayzzz that's all :3 tyyy for reading !! i had sm making a new observations, considering it's been a year since my last LMFAOO. and again, if it doesn't apply, let it fly. ty bye ^__^

[chaifootsteps]

do you think Homer Simpson is a better father than Stolas? my instant response is 'yes' but it's kind of hard to articulate why

on the surface they share a lot of the same flaws - selfishness, insensitivity - but I think what makes the difference for me is that Homer does show up for his kids when they need them

even Stolas' best moment as a father - when he actually listened to Via at Loo Loo Land - pales in comparison to the speech he gives Lisa when Mr Bergstrom leaves, or the Do It For Her photo (working a job he hates for Maggie's sake - Stolas wouldn't know anything about working or sacrifice) or...to be honest I'm blanking on a nice moment between him and Bart but I think there must be one in there somewhere.

when you compare the worst they've ever done it's no contest either. the closest Homer ever got to bringing someone he was cheating with around his kids was when the wife he accidentally married in Vegas showed back up in a late season episode. and he not only didn't want her around but she arguably took advantage of him because the two women got him and Ned hitched in a Vegas wedding because he was drunk, he didn't do it willingly

and whenever he messes up big enough to jeopardize the family he puts them first. I certainly can't imagine Homer moping around distracted by something else if a hitman is a danger to Marge or the kids!

I don't know if Homer's a better dad, but I think it's pretty close and if nothing else, he's a much funnier one. He's a deeply loving father whose crappy parenting is played for laughs as opposed to Stolas, who's coddled by the narrative and whose daughter is increasingly vilified for his mistakes.

As an aside, this exchange is pure Stolas.

"I promise you kids lots of things. That's what makes me such a good father!"

"Actually, keeping promises would make you a good father."

"No, that would make me a great father."

[vrtvyg]

their bedroom headcannons!!

Soap: Bisexual switch. the type to have a threesome. has a decent amount of experience. that doesn't mean he's some god at sex though, can be too pushy at times, being younger, his sex drive is still pretty fucking high. there isn't a day that goes by without him trying to get some. you probably have to push his hand off of your thigh multiple times a day. in public. definitely a "let's go to the bathroom." kinda guy. he's an amazing top, good at touching you where you need and going at your pace, pretty confident in that area. same with bottoming, except he's extremely bratty, to the point where he's more genuinely pissing you off than turning you on. if he's going to bottom he has to be forced into the position. pinned to the floor, using whatever you can to tie his arms behind his back (probably yours or his belt), and keeping his face against the floor with your hand gripping the back of his neck. even then he's still bratty, taunting you in between whorish moans.

Ghost: Unidentified top. prefers women, very rarely finds a man he's interested in. honestly rare to find ANYONE he's interested in. but when he does, it takes awhile to open up enough to do much sexual. and when he does he's usually in control, hates giving up the upper hand, not just because he's used to being the masked lieutenant, but because of his past traumas. and it's not like he has a meltdown everytime you TRY, it's more like a simply "nah" and moves on.... BUT, if he does agree to let you be on top, he's going to be on his back, legs over your hips, making sure you do it EXACTLY how he wants, and how he's comfortable. sometimes it'll be slow, other times he'll tell you to go quick. he's not the most vocal, either. I imaging it's more quiet grunts and small groans, telling you what he likes and that you're doing good, making him feel good.

Price: Doesn't care about gender, not too picky. Will NOT be letting you fuck him. he'll let you ride, order him around, hell, he'll even let you edge him. but he's not letting you do him. it's not some manly pride thing, just isn't into it. doesn't feel good to him. though he WILL let you fuck his thighs, as a reward. doesn't feel much from it, but loves to watch you desperately thrust into his thighs like it were his hole. always treats you amazing. makes you feel good. is usually gentle, praises the fuck outta ya. and similar to ghost, isn't very loud. soft grunts and an occasional moan. might get TOO into it and stop talking completely.

Gaz: Fucking gorgeous man. whether he wants to rop or bottom, he's going to look great doing it. probably sounds the prettiest, not as loud as Soap but definitely loud. He'd probably like being on his knees, whether it's giving you head, getting fucked, or just kneeling to kneel. he eats that shit up. very loving and affectionate during it, not one for degrading. likes to hold your hand when he's the one giving. definitely ALWAYS starts with a sloppy make-out session.

Graves: Fucking hates being fucked. (he loves it, but will threaten to send his shadows after you if you bring it up.) He likes to top, of course, who doesn't love sticking their dick into something. He let's out the most pathetic moans, trying to cover them with grunts or coughs. almost slapped you when you teased him about how loud he is, denied it profusely. (you recorded him taking your dick, just so he could hear himself. he definitely jerks off to it when he's on base.) He can be a bit too rough when topping, definitely has some sort of thing for powerplay, wants you to call him by his rank. (almost cried when you made him do the same. good crying, of course.) is affectionate afterwards, but from a distance. will be on the opposite side of the bed, demanding you scratch his back, but stay over there. he's too hot to cuddle right now. but he still loves you. but from a distance.

König: Honestly, he seems like the type to be really cocky going into it, then gets really embarrassed when you have to move his hand to the right place constantly. If he's into men, (this is a male reader page, of course he is.) he's a less confident, dated mostly women in his younger year, very reluctant to give you a hand job, let alone head. but with some pushy encouragement he'll take the tip into his mouth, face flushed the whole time. probably keeps his hood on during it, gets embarrassed if you look at him while he's sucking. probably won't let you cum in his mouth, thinks it's gross. (spits aggressively when you do it anyways.) He prefers to be the one doing the fucking, but if you somehow convince him to switch, he wants to do it in a spooning position, too embarrassed to be on his knees or back. going to be more grinding than fucking him. definitely a whiner.

Bonus: adding onto bratty Soap, if you praise him, instead of punishing him, he'll slowly melt into being more manageable. more quiet, nodding along to whatever you're saying, pushing back against you for more, instead of mocking your every move.

"Silly boy Johnny, good boy's aren't supposed to bite back. be good for me, kay? perfect..." He'll shut the fuck up and simply nod.

[cherrio-krispz]

wait no I’m invested what’s this specific alpha cross detail? /nf (I’m gonna regret asking /hj)

oh boy errrmmmmmm

So like…….

[mithryl-draws]

brought my long-suffering tabletop warlock Kalus with me when I started my BG3 playthrough and he's having a great time. making lots of new friends. sticking worms in his brain. the usual.

[chiarrara]

Nobara truthers, Gojo truthers, I'm a goddamn Higuruma truther. He's not fucking dead, my dude is coming back

[merakiui]

Omg apocalypse au 🤯

Having to choose which group(dorm) to take shelter, but that comes with a price...

Just wait till the repopulation part arrives

>:D I will share some basic thoughts about how each dorm would function!

Heartslabyul is very rule-oriented. Everyone has a job that they're expected to do so that the compound won't find itself swept up in chaos. Riddle is very good at keeping order within the group he leads, though sometimes his patience and restraint are tested when a certain few (Ace and Deuce) get on his nerves. Riddle is welcoming to all, but he's extremely cautious. After all, he can't risk letting anyone who may be infected with blot into this sanctuary. Trey and Cater are usually the ones who are permitted to lead a select few to scope out the nearby areas and go on supply runs. They probably encounter you on one of these runs and bring you back to Riddle when you beg for help.

Riddle has a zero-tolerance policy when it comes to disobedience. Everyone gets three strikes, and if you breach the third infraction you're thrown out and banned from the compound. He's ruthless when it comes to this rule, so Ace is always toeing the line of a third strike. You've come to his rescue more than once, which infuriates Riddle because he assumes you're taking Ace's side, when in reality you're just trying to save your friend from impending doom (not that you approve of his mischief in such an uncertain time). The outside world is nowhere near as safe as it is within the walls of the Heartslabyul compound. Ace would do well to remember that.

Deuce is more well-behaved, and so sometimes he'll join Trey or Cater on supply runs. He's well-versed in fighting, so he can hold his own in a physical fight. When it comes to magic, he's still improving, but he wants to help out in any way that he can. He looks up to Riddle greatly and wants to prove himself as someone worthy and strong. Ace likes to tease him a lot, but it's usually Deuce who reminds him that he ought to be more serious. Apocalypses are nothing to treat lightheartedly. One wrong move and you could lose everything.

- - -

Savanaclaw is not very rule-oriented. In fact, the only rule that's made abundantly clear is that you have to fight to survive. You're either weak or you're strong; there is no in between. Leona was made king of the compound after dethroning its previous leader. He'll let anyone into the compound so long as they can hold their own in a fight and are useful. This usually means a test of strength, whether physical or mental, and if you pass Leona will recognize your worth. Ruggie is usually in charge of supply runs and any other operations. Sometimes they'll gather; other times they'll steal from nearby groups and compounds. Jack doesn't approve of these methods; he thinks everyone should be given the chance to survive, but Ruggie and Leona remind him that if everyone got to survive then the world's population wouldn't be sitting at what it is now.

It's Ruggie who takes you as a prisoner when he finds you snooping around just on the border of Savanaclaw's territory. Jack's there to remind Ruggie of respect and whatnot as he forces you along towards the compound. Jack doesn't talk much, but he does watch you keenly as you're led to Leona. He's studying you to determine whether you pose a threat, sniffing the air to see if he can pick out any foreign, perilous smells. Once you're deemed harmless and you manage to pass Leona's test, you're welcomed into the fray. Jack sticks with you, helping you adjust to the way of life in the group. Leona may seem lazy and hard on you at times, but he does secretly care. He just expects everyone to be able to hold their own. The world's filled with liars and cheats; Jack's realized that there's no helping it, especially when the world has become so unruly.

- - -

Octavinelle is a safe haven. It's as if Azul has thought of nearly everything in order make the compound as safe and welcoming as possible. Unlike the other compounds, which are all on land, Azul's makes use of both the land and the sea. Half of it is underwater, with nearly indestructible glass tunnels that connect into a labyrinthine structure built of the strongest, sturdiest materials, while the other half is built upon the land to make use of both environments. You may think the sea isn't as bad as it is on the land, but it's so much more frightening. Those dark, dangerous depths hold all kinds of infected things: monsters, mers, mer-monsters...

Azul is willing to accept anyone into the compound, even those who may be infected so long as they stay in a specific layer of the compound (the one far below the land in the sea) and will take the medicine necessary to curb the blot infection (it's not a cure, but it is something he's managed to conjure after much trial and error. Only Octavinelle can brag that they have something akin to a cure, and Azul is only willing to share for a very steep price). Azul himself is infected, as are Riddle, Leona, Jamil, Vil, and Idia, and perhaps even Malleus, and he's constantly finding ways to suppress the monstrosities of Overblot. Azul has built the compound upon lies and secrets, all of which rest at the foundation. He'll pile sweetness onto poison so that you won't ever find the truth amidst so many falsehoods. Anyone who proves to be an issue or has seen and learned too much will be cast into the sea, but not before being thoroughly interrogated by Jade and Floyd. There's always new information to be found!

Jade and Floyd are swift and strong enough to brave the horrors of the ocean in order to search in sunken shipwrecks and husks of plane to find anything that might be useful. They're a formidable duo and aren't afraid of anything. Either you learned of the rumors of a very welcoming compound and came to Azul willingly or the twins dragged you to him by force. In any case, you'll find yourself at Azul's feet, hoping he may take pity on you. Make no mistake; Azul will accept the poor, unfortunate souls left hopeless by the apocalypse, but that doesn't mean they're permitted to stay rent-free. You'll likely be given many tasks in order to earn your keep. Octavinelle runs on information; it's become somewhat of an intelligence hub, where Azul keeps note of what goes on within the other compounds and the world beyond his safe haven, trading and taking info as he sees fit.

- - -

Scarabia has also thought of everything to combat the apocalypse. Kalim is a little too carefree when he throws celebrations in order to keep morale high and to distract those from the gloomy situation beyond the compound. It's Jamil who really runs everything. He knows everything about everyone who steps foot in the compound and he's very picky with who gets to stay. He isn't one to act rashly, rather he'll think through every action that can be taken in order to solve a problem when one arises (which happens quite often considering how restless some get within the compound). He plans behind the scenes, allowing Kalim to think he's everyone's great and glorious leader who can bring happiness to all. In secret, he's getting information, keeping an eye on anyone who may pose a threat to the compound (such as any traitors), and he's ready to curb attempted usurpation at once.

Jamil does not trust easily; Kalim does. In fact, Jamil probably doesn't trust you when Kalim makes the decision to let you stay (he always lets everyone in; it's up to Jamil to turn those who he thinks are infected away. You can never be too careful in the apocalypse, so some may think he's heartless when it comes to deciding who can stay and who must go. But this is for the sake of the compound; you have to make sacrifices because this isn't an ideal world). Like the other compounds, you'll be given work to keep yourself busy and exercised. Whether that's by preparing ingredients for food, helping in the gardens, doing inventory of weapons and other supplies, etc. it's expected that you help out.

Kalim is quick to forgive those who may have broken too many rules or intentionally stir the pot, but Jamil won't tolerate it. Safety comes first, so he'll do whatever he must in order to ensure everyone else can continue to live at the cost of a life or two. He's had to harden his heart; the apocalypse isn't kind to those with pure hearts, yet somehow Kalim's still surviving. At least he can be a ray of sunshine amidst stormy situations.

- - -

Pomefiore is also quite orderly. Vil has everyone and everything under control, so much so that you'd think he's taken a page from Riddle's book. But being one of immense beauty (even during a crisis like an apocalypse) while having quite the famous reputation and status works well for keeping the masses at ease. Vil's word is law in the Pomefiore compound. He will not tolerate any mischief, rebellion, or foolishness, and if anyone thinks it's wise to act stupidly without regard to the rest of the compound Vil has no issue casting them out. This is to be a safe, responsible compound and he's the leader. It would be poor etiquette for a leader if he always let things like that slide, so for that reason Vil can seem quite strict and immovable. He only has everyone's best interests in mind, the biggest being survival. You must understand that he's doing what's right for his compound, even if the right thing is achieved at a few lost lives.

The towers in the Pomefiore compound are perfect for analyzing faraway areas with scopes, binoculars, and anything with ranged sight. It's also good for sniping. Rook usually mans one of the towers, taking down anything he deems a threat to the surrounding territory that Pomefiore has claimed as its own. He usually leads a group to hunt and gather, often returning with wondrous success. Epel wants to accompany him on these runs (he always arms himself with his trusty brass knuckles; he's actually quite good at hand-to-hand combat, and he's always improving each time he spars with Vil or Rook), but Vil forbids him from going on these runs. Until Epel can beat him or Rook in a fight, he will stay within the compound and complete other tasks. Epel usually works within the fields and gardens, tending to livestock and crops because he has expertise in doing such things. You will probably join him for these duties if you can't fight, use magic, or hunt as well as the others can.

- - -

Ignihyde is the perfect place to go to during the apocalypse. With the best, high-functioning technology, an abundance of resources, and a power supply that can last for many years to come, it is guaranteed to keep you safe. With STYX's technology and resources, the Ignihyde compound is thriving. It has been built meticulously and methodically; every part of it serves the whole. Walls rise high into the sky, it's enclosed with an indestructible dome to keep avian dangers or bad quality air out (usually putting such oxygen through a filter so that when it enters the compound it is fresh and breathable), the tech systems can create and simulate artificial sunlight, rain from sprinklers, and can even replicate the weather of the four seasons. This is probably the most sci-fi of the compounds. With the help of STYX robots and other technologies, any threats or enemies wanting to prey on the compound won't stand a chance. Any internal threats will be locked away in solitary confinement for further analysis.

Beneath the compound, there is a branch of STYX that conducts research on infected test subjects. Idia and Ortho will oversee the research, but it's Idia who is in charge and has the final say. All of the most intelligent doctors, researchers, and nurses can be found working at this branch. It functions as both a research lab and a hospital. STYX is hard at work to find a cure for the blot infections. Idia's overheard the recent success at the Octavinelle compound (he keeps tabs on every compound and knows more than you'd think), and he knows Azul wouldn't share his findings out of the goodness of his heart. Idia doesn't need his help, though. He has faith in STYX's research. They'll create a cure eventually; it's a process, not a miracle. Logical science always comes through in the end. After all, it's science that has allowed him to build up the compound so that it truly is the most OP compound in all of Twisted Wonderland. Besides, Idia's read, played, and watched his fair share of the apocalypse genre. He's very prepared for this.

- - -

Diasomnia may not be very technologically advanced like the other compounds, but what they lack in tech they make up for in magic. Some of the most powerful mages reside within the Diasomnia compound, with Malleus leading the fray. The concept of an apocalypse is not frightening nor foreign to he and Lilia. They've both lived long enough to have experienced, seen, or heard of things like famine, war, and natural disasters—each feeling like an apocalypse in its own devastating way—so an apocalypse such as this one is not very dreadful to them. They don't fear it in the way a human might, but they will provide protection to those who exist within the compound walls. The brambles that surround the Diasomnia compound's exterior are perfect for getting in the way of any enemies, and those with malicious intent will be promptly stopped by Silver and Sebek, both dedicated guards who have loyally sworn to fight for and protect Malleus. Though Malleus could also just incinerate dangerous people with a flick of his wrist if he was so inclined, commanding scalding, verdant flames to devour flesh and bone until all that remains is ash.

Lilia is very experienced in combat and in the art of war, so he usually trains those who show promise in fighting. He also scopes out the areas beyond the compound to search for supplies, sometimes going by himself and sometimes bringing Silver or Sebek along so that they may learn and train in the moment. Silver is a very rational mage; though he's prone to sleepy spells, he is a dedicated bodyguard who will always do the right, honest thing. If Silver encounters you, he will want to take you back to the compound to help you. Lilia will agree if he's there and happens to see you, a poor, little lamb in need of protection. He thinks you're simply darling. Though he may also have his own covert reasons for allowing Silver to help you. You'll never know what these are because he hides true intentions behind kind smiles and silly humor. If Sebek finds you, you may have to pray that Silver's with him to convince him into bringing you back, or you'll just have to hope he's in a pleasant mood. Sebek will not trust you, even if you appear to be genuine. Even if Malleus has made a good judge of your character, he'll still have lingering doubts. These will be snuffed the more he's reminded that the Malleus has said you aren't a danger and that you are allowed to stay and seek sanctuary with him.

Malleus grows quite attached to you the more he becomes acquainted with you. The apocalypse presents many dangers, but it also instills immense loneliness in him. He has witnessed human suffering; he knows how fragile mortals can be. And yet he knows that, as terrible as an apocalypse is, it has blessed him with one miracle: you. He won't let you out of his sights. In fact, none of the main four will. You'll always be monitored, whether upfront or in secret. If any harm were to befall you, Malleus would simply char the offender to ash on the spot. You are his most prized treasure in this grim world. He can't let you succumb to any dangers.

- - -

Rollo leads his compound fairly and responsibly. The apocalypse just reaffirms the idea that magic is harmful and dangerous and that all mages are bad, so he grows to hate magic even more than he already does. Despite this, he'll still use magic in some instances if need be. For the most part, the compound (which is essentially Noble Bell's campus and the many buildings that comprise it) is very self-sufficient. It has an advantage with the bell tower, as it's tall enough to overlook the ruined City of Flowers and what lies beyond. He'll utilize this structure as a lookout tower.

Despite the fact that he may come off as cold or unapproachable, Rollo won't turn those away from the compound unless he knows they're infected or are dangerous. He expects everyone to view him as a leader worthy of this position, and anyone who tries to go against his word will either be severely gaslit into believing otherwise or are simply never heard from again. Rollo doesn't have time to deal with insignificant pests who want to challenge his authority, so if you wish to be difficult you can take yourself and your difficulties down to the dungeons that reside underground. Punishments and interrogations are usually carried out there, far from any prying eyes so that the peace of the compound won't be disturbed. Rollo oversees everything that happens within cold, concrete walls, and he does not show any mercy to those who are traitors or spies.

Rollo will offer you protection and sanctuary when you find yourself at the compound's gates. So long as you aren't here for nefarious purposes and you aren't infected, he'll welcome you warmly. Rollo actually keeps a watchful eye on newcomers just to ensure they aren't a threat to the society within the compound. He'll give you a tour of the grounds, informing you of where everything is and it's purpose. He wants everyone to feel comfortable here despite the horrors that exist outside, so he'll do what he can to make everyone's stay tolerable. He quickly grows to like you, especially when you offer to help in any way that you can so that you can pay him back for saving you, which means you usually trail after him or deliberately seek him out looking for ways to be useful. Rollo likes that word—saving. He likes the idea of being your savior, of being the only one in this disastrous world who can offer you salvation, and since you claim you want to be useful he can think of plenty of ways you can put yourself to use.

Rollo won't ask for much. In fact, he's very sweet. You might not think so if you see villainous sides of him, but romance is hard to come by in an apocalypse. He'll give you two options: stay with him in the safety of this perfect sanctuary, or throw yourself under a deity's microscope in the outside world and hope that whatever may exist in the clouds above takes pity on your tainted soul. If you know what's best for you, you'll choose him. It's not like he's really giving you much of a choice in this matter anyway.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

one thing abt fujimoto’s writing that i will always adore is that you can tell he really loves women. like. he loves women. woman enjoyer. and you rlly can’t say the same for most male mangaka 💀

[chiisana-lion]

aizou is just soooo. boy who has had his views on love as a whole incredibly warped by his cheating estranged father and neglectful mother and (albeit guilty) brother who once abandoned him in that suffocating environment alone and yet still has so much love in his heart for them regardless

hahaoyatte especially really does convey his character and feelings regarding his mother better than any previous adaptation did. because really thats the core of it all!! thats why he wanted to sing in the first place!!! it had made his family smile Of Course thats all he knew how to do when yuko finally broke and while the trauma caused by her outburst at him cant be ignored you really have to understand even so. as unfair as it is even now he truly deeply loves her and wishes her well and always has been/will be important to him.

where do i even start with him towards yuujirou too. the guy who wanted to be acknowledged so badly finally being needed in turn. the one who truly revived his song again! the one who reminded me of the fun and why in the first place he sang at all!! hes always just a bit out of reach but inevitably there for him in arm's distance in the end. its no wonder yuujirous eventually become the one most precious to him who really taught him what its like to love someone. i fear only one person has ever truly understood me and i fucking hate the guy sort of situation for real. and he looks at him like this

[monstersinthecosmos]

not for anything but friendly reminder that ~fandom discourse~ about where women belong (or people you perceive as women) is misogynistic as fuck. or what they're allowed to say, or what they're allowed to write about, or what they're allowed to enjoy.

next time you see someone having a tantrum and vaguing, especially if their posts from week to week completely contradict each other, perhaps analyze if the common denominator is "a gross woman said something and now i'm mad" without otherwise adhering to any actual principles.