#stupid ass foot liking nerd

[cherrio-krispz]

wait no I’m invested what’s this specific alpha cross detail? /nf (I’m gonna regret asking /hj)

oh boy errrmmmmmm

So like…….

[loveinhawkins]

was this written to solve my own inconsistencies because i keep forgetting Eddie literally hotwired the RV, they don’t need keys, why do you keep mentioning keys, you fool? maybe. do i also think they’d be this stupid? yes. ❤️

“Oh, son of a bitch,” Dustin says, midway to The War Zone.

Steve, who is used to this sort of outburst for things as mild as Dustin forgetting just one out of the eight pens on his person, does not react.

However Eddie—Hellfire rants aside—is not quite as familiar yet. He jumps practically a foot in the air.

“Jesus Christ, what now?”

All Dustin offers by way of explanation is an accusatory, “You,” pointing his finger right in Eddie’s face.

And then Eddie sees what’s dangling from said finger.

“… Oh.”

“What?” Steve says, glancing at the rearview mirror; Eddie quickly blocks Dustin from view, goes right up on his tiptoes and spreads his arms wide, curses when Dustin throws the keys—

—to Max, who catches them one-handed, who gives Eddie a grin that’s not so much pitying as it is evil, and then she—

—throws them to Lucas, and he somehow gets the metal ring to land on his finger, like he’s in a movie, and he twirls them round and round until Max snorts, and he grins like that had been his aim all along.

“Sinclair,” Eddie says, “I am begging you.”

“I’m not hearing much about what’s in it for him,” Erica says.

Aha! Eddie zeroes in on Erica and blocks her from Lucas, like a very unjust game of Keep Away.

“Dude,” Lucas says, affronted, “that’s not fair.”

Eddie has the decency to look a bit ashamed. Not too ashamed to stop because he is a pathetic man, but at least Steve still hasn’t noticed the—

“Lucas,” Erica says, in the aggrieved tones of a sister who’s despaired at him many, many times. “You’re on the basketball team. Just do a pass fake, nerd.”

Lucas feigns to the left, and Eddie falls for it—but, in what he’s sure is a completely unsportsmanlike move, he uses his height to his advantage, jumps…

And drops the keys with a clatter.

Steve must instantly recognise the sound for what it is, because he starts to cackle.

Eddie’s only saving grace is that Steve is driving, so at least he can’t see—

“Eddie’s going, like, super red in the face right now,” Dustin narrates helpfully.

“Scarlet,” Lucas says.

“Vermillion,” Robin pipes up from the floor.

“Ooh,” Dustin, Lucas, and Max chorus, impressed. Jesus Christ, they almost harmonize.

“Yeah, Eddie,” Steve says dryly, “you fucking moron. How did you miss those, it’s not like you had literally anything else on your mind.”

“You’re a real gentleman, Harrington, anyone ever told you that?” Eddie says weakly.

“Maybe once or twice,” Steve says, drawing it out teasingly, as if he means not often enough.

“Well, at least we got on the road,” Nancy says. Her voice quivers like she’s trying not to laugh—perched on the table, eyes shining with amusement. “And it did look pretty cool, Eddie.”

Eddie thinks this is an incredibly generous assessment, considering his main thought while breaking into the RV had been don’t get stuck in the window, Jesus Christ.

And then… like, he didn’t expect Steve to actually come up and watch him hotwire the damn thing, like, with rapt attention, so close that Eddie was kinda concerned he’d electrocute himself instead. Honestly, it was a miracle he got the engine started.

“That’s sweet of you, Wheeler, but I’m self-aware.”

“Since when?” Erica says.

Underneath everyone’s laughter, Steve grins and says, “Hey, don’t worry, man.” He catches Eddie’s eye in the rearview mirror, winks. “It was an educational experience.”

“Oh, wow, your face is even redder.”

“Henderson, I’m gonna put those goddamn keys so far up your ass.”

[wynnyfryd]

Trailer Park Steve AU part 3

part 1 | part 2

(tw: guns, accidental death)

Robin’s already in full panic mode by the time Steve pulls up to her place, flinging the passenger door open and throwing herself into the car with so much force that the car bounces on its wheels a little. “Drive!!”

“Jesus Christ, good morning to you, too.”

“Steve!”

Steve starts to drive.

Beside him, Robin flips the visor down to look at her reflection; groans and scrubs her hands down her face in misery at whatever she sees. Steve doesn’t really get it. He thinks she looks beautiful, with her hair gently moving in the breeze from the open window, with her freckles lit up by the early morning sun.

“Ugh,” she says, turning to look at him, “I can’t believe I look like a zombie and you’re gonna make me late to the first day of school.”

“Wow.” Fuckin’ ingrate. And when he was just being so nice to her in his head. “How about a thank you, huh? ‘Thanks for picking me up, Steve. Thanks for bringing my backpack, Steve. Sorry you almost got shanked by your neighbor, Steve.’”

“You what???”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Um, yes it very much does matter, what the—”

“—I’m just saying, a little gratitude? Wouldn’t hurt you.”

He licks at the corner of his mouth, spritzes wiper fluid to clear the bugs off the windshield. Robin’s eyes are bulging out of her head, but he really doesn’t want to talk about how he still feels the ghost press of steel against his throat, so: “You’re not even right, by the way; I don’t know why you’re complaining.”

“Huh?”

“School started yesterday. I’m making you late for the second day of school.”

“Yesss,” she draws the word out like he’s stupid, rolling her wrist in a hurry up and get it motion, “but everyone knows that syllabus day doesn’t count. The first pep rally is the real first day of school.”

Ah, there it is.

Steve steals another peek at his best friend while they’re on a straightaway, notes the nervous twitch of her hands as she goes back to fussing at her reflection; the way she’s clumping her lashes together with seven coats too many of some drugstore brand mascara. She’s wearing lipstick. “This is about Vick—”

“—Don’t talk about—”

“—It’s about Vickie, isn’t it?”

“Ughhhhh.” Robin folds forward and thunks her head against the dash. “Fine, okay? Fine! Yes! This may have something to do with a distressingly cute fellow marching band member. Are you happy now?”

“Ecstatic.”

“Oooh, big word for you, Steven.” She swats him on the shoulder, face all twisted up in offense. “Stop laughing!”

“Stop hitting me,” he laughs. “I’ll dump your ass out on this highway.”

She gasps and narrows her eyes at him. “You wouldn’t.”

Steve eases his foot onto the brake.

“Okay, okay! Mercy! I’m being an asshole, alright? I’m sorry. I’m just— I’m stressed! Being gay is very stressful.”

The knife incident pops back into his mind. “Yeah,” he mutters, “I imagine it is.”

—

He catches himself slouching down into his seat a bit when they pull up to the school. Has to force himself to sit upright, hears his mother’s tutting in his ear about bad posture and the message it projects to the world.

It’s not that he’s embarrassed to be here; really, he isn’t. He’s just hoping to avoid being spotted by the nuggets now that they go here, too, lest he be accosted for evading his chauffeur duties.

God.

Dustin’s nerd shit is infecting his brain.

Robin grabs her bag out of the back seat, plants a parting peck on Steve’s cheek as she gets out of the car. “See you later?”

“Yeah, I’ll pick you up for work.”

“Love you, dingus.”

And then he’s alone again.

With Robin gone, Steve finds himself driving. Wandering and aimless, like a ghost who doesn’t know he’s gone. It’s not like he has nothing to do — he’s supposed to be out finding a second job, finding a way to support himself and his mom, because he’s the man of the house now. Because his life has turned into one of those shitty, overcomplicated word problems from math class.

If a recently widowed mother works no hours and her minimum-wage son works as many as Family Video will allow, how much mold-riddled dogshit housing can they afford?

Not much.

Inevitably, he finds himself circling the scorched bones of Starcourt, driving tired loops around the barbed wire perimeter. His ghost likes to guide him here; can’t shake the place where he shook off the mortal coil.

He didn’t know it at the time, but Steve Harrington died the day the mall burned down. Embarrassing, to not hear the death knell as his family name went up in smoke.

It was hard to hear much at all that night, between the concussion and the fireworks and the shrieking of a monster being torn apart, but the memory caresses his mind now in cruel whispers: the headrush of victory; the blood and the sweat; the relief that they’d won, they’d done it, it’s over, they won.

Steve tugs at his bad ear ‘til the ringing subsides.

Some fucking grand prize.

The thing is, you can’t go around exploding an eldritch horror without alerting the US government, and the US government can’t go around letting major investors in a hostile commie invasion keep their assets once they find out about their treasonous schemes. It happened fast: the arrest, the bail, the impending trial and the seizure of property. Richard Harrington was once a small town god on an invisible throne, making deals with devils in shadowy boardrooms, and suddenly he was looking at life in a cell.

Maybe it was a blessing he died before his reckoning was due. Maybe it was no accident at all.

The second, and perhaps more important, thing is: stray bullets don’t care about your looming court date.

Dad had a habit of cleaning his guns while he was drunk, nursing a whiskey in one hand while he polished the gleaming barrels with the other. Pointless, really, because the guns were always pristine to begin with. Dick Harrington didn’t hunt. Didn’t shoot. Claimed the pistol was for home defense, that he kept it loaded in case anyone ever tried to hurt his family, but Steve knew the truth.

His dad just liked to flirt with death. Liked to handle pretty, deadly things, stroke his fingers over ruthless metal and feel the rush of power when he walked away unscathed.

He didn’t walk away that night.

Didn’t even face death standing.

Sliced through his femoral artery and rolled right out of his chair.

They found him lying on the ground in a dark, sticky puddle, gasping like a fish as blood spurted from his thigh. Crazy how fast it happened. Steve had been in his room when the shot rang out, and he barely managed to reach the bottom of the stairs before the gurgling noises stopped. Just boom! whizz! bang! and Dick Harrington was gone.

Maybe it’s a good thing, too, that they lost the house.

The image of his mother in the hallway that night — shellshocked in the doorway, one pale hand shaking in front of her open mouth, features wide and wet with waking horror as she stared into the room — was enough to make him never want to step foot in the place again.

So now they live in a rundown piece of shit on the wrong side of town, with hideous burnt orange carpet and wood paneled walls, with cracks in the ceiling and cigarette burns in the walls, some parting gifts from whatever feral hick lived there before them, and it feels like another cruel, cosmic joke. Like the universe is delighting in the Harringtons’ comeuppance; like the blackened beams and brick rubble of Starcourt are all twisting to form one great, mocking mouth; the better to smile and laugh at their misfortune.

You bought your bed, now you have to lie in it.

He didn’t even know that the Harringtons owned Forest Hills until it was the only asset left to their name.

He’s pretty sure his dad bought it more as a joke than a genuine investment. Meant to teach Steve a lesson, like how he used to bring home Waffle House applications whenever Steve got a C on a report card. This is your future if you don’t straighten up, son.

Kill yourself, dad.

Oh, wait.

You already did.

—

part 4

[dickgraysonsbitch]

MOTH TO A FLAME — DICK GRAYSON X JOURNALIST!READER

3.3k words | divider by @cafekitsune | requests open !

summary: your relationship with dick grayson was history two years ago. as of yesterday, you were (not so) happily engaged to another man, and your relationship with him was swoon-worthy, but it seems like it could crumble like a house of cards. so when your perfect ex comes back into your life for help on a case, will you go back to him like a moth to a flame?

you’re just a moth to a flame.

you were engaged. you knew this, this wasn’t new fucking information, and you were supposed to feel elated, on top of the world, like you were on cloud nine or some other shit people in love said—wait, no. you were in love with your fiancé, or at least you tried to be. he was sweet, and he looked good, with his fluffy blonde hair, deep brown eyes, and lean figure. nerd hot. just your type, but why did it seem like as every day went on, you kept trying to convince yourself that this was what you wanted?

you stretched your arms before lugging yourself out of bed, grabbing your phone to check your messages, which you assumed were the reason that your phone was buzzing so much that it was about to fall off your dresser.

PHOTOS NOTIFICATION: november, 2021, AMUSEMENT MILE THEME PARK. do you want to share this memory with DICKIEBIRD 💙?

you pressed your mouth into a line, reminiscing. that was probably the best time you’d ever had in your entire life. you, dick, wally and artemis, eating cotton candy and popcorn at an amusement park.

“one more bite of food and you’re going into carnival crime territory, wally,” you sing, your voice carrying its signature teasing lilt. “then i’m going to win, and you’ll have to pay for everything.”

“just make your stupid boyfriend pay, he’s the billionaire!” wally's disgruntled groan came from a foot behind you, were he was still struggling on his second milkshake. sucker.

dick threw an arm around your shoulder, spreading a hint of warmth over your torso. he was, as you liked to call him, your personal space heater. “hey, it’s the son of a billionaire. and i’d much rather see my super sexy girlfriend beat my best friend’s ass.”

artemis grinned, her phone ready to snap a picture of when wally would undisputedly hurl like a toddler who had eaten too many gerber puffs. “me too, so hurry up, wally.”

the memory of dick throwing up because of the amount of sugar he had consumed in the short span of three hours almost had you laughing out loud, with your fiancé in the bed right next to you. god, you were so pathetic.

“something funny?” his low voice was next to your ear, and you could almost feel his breath on your neck, but for some reason, you wanted to push him away.

your breath hitched, and the guilt crept into your heart again. you were in bed with your fiancé, and you were daydreaming about your ex-boyfriend, who probably forgot your existence. dick was charming, but even you knew that he had a steady stream of people on call to fuck. one of the plus sides to being the hottest person in blüdhaven, you guessed.

“uh, just checking the group chat. girl stuff, matt, you can’t see it.” your mouth twisted into a mischievous smirk, and you quickly stood up and walked towards the shower, rapidly checking the group chat that you opened up your phone for. curse dick grayson and his beautiful blue eyes, which were obviously the only reason you stared that that picture for so long. not the lovesick look he had on his face when looking at you, and definitely not his flirty smile when you made eye contact with him. that would be crazy, right?

maybe you should finally open the group chat.

rue: so how’d your night go?? 😉

annie: i bet she’s so tired that she can’t even walkkk

charlie: ofc she can’t, it’s matt myers!! he’s so fine 😩😩

the conversation then devolved into a discussion of which of matt’s photoshoots was the ‘hottest’, which should’ve made any other, self respecting friend group shy away from the conversation, but never rue, annie and charlie. no, they said that matt was too ‘sexy’ to be quiet about, and it was like they were waiting for you to mess up just to take your place. the sad part was that you wouldn’t mind letting them.

you had met matt, ironically, at a wayne gala that you were covering post breakup with dick, which was the only way that you measured time nowadays. he was hot enough to be… a rebound, and you were okay with that, until he started hounding you for a date. one date, two dates, and suddenly, a year and a half later, you were engaged. the next step, obviously (in matt's words), was the whole white picket fence, 2.5 kids, and living the rest of your days in your dream house. if it was so obvious, why did it make your stomach curdle like you had a flu? why did the idea of kids with matt, being bonded to him for life, make you want to toss your stupid ring at his face, pack your bags, and run? did he even know why your favorite color was dark blue? did matt myers know that the reason that the sapphire stone on your ring was because of dick grayson?

you glanced at your fiancé before looking at your phone and sighing. “matt, i'm going out for some fresh air.” your heart panged. maybe you should give matt some slack, because after all, he picked up the pieces of you after dick so abruptly left. maybe he was better than what you gave him credit for. maybe the two of you would work long term, and you could go the white picket fence with him. it couldn’t hurt. “wanna come with?”

“nah. get me some seaweed chips though, from erewhon. we ran out.” matt shot you a badly timed wink, which made you grimace, and in that moment, you realized a very disturbing fact. nobody could make your blood pump like dick grayson, and no matter who you were with, there would only be one man on your mind.

sighing, you quickly changed into a ratty hoodie and leggings, making sure you weren’t in some sort of nightmare dream that you weren’t able to get out of. because that was your dream, right? being engaged to an incredibly attractive, talented and kind person, and spending the rest of your life with him? you gave yourself a short pep talk in the mirror—“you are hot! everyone wants you! you are engaged!”—before slipping on your shoes and calculating the distance to blüdhaven’s nearest erewhon, which was an easy twenty minute walk away. maybe you could thank matt for the exercise that he was always hounding you to do.

step. step. step. your walk turned into the same banal rotation of the past year and a half of your life, always the same thing over and over, and the thought of what your life might have been like if you had just stayed clung in your mind like cobwebs. unwanted, unnecessary, but it made your heart ache just a little bit to get rid of them.

erewhon came faster than you expected it to, and you stepped inside, the chilly air hitting your face like a wall of ice, and you grabbed a basket, picking up those chips matt loved. he was safe. safe and comfortable, but why did safe and comfortable suddenly feel like boring and predictable?

you caught a glimpse of yourself in the reflective glass of the door, yearning to see the bright eyed, excitable girl that existed only a few years ago, but all you saw was… you. drained, unhappy, a permanent frown on your face. you attempted a smile, pulling your mouth from both sides, but the result was only a mix of a grimace and a clown’s toothy grin. you couldn’t smile right either.

your phone pinged, and a blue heart showed up on your screen. you hadn’t texted him in two years, but the icon still made your heart flutter with anticipation, before your squashed it like a bug under a boot.

DICKIEBIRD 💙: hey smartie pants! i need to talk to u about something important. let’s meet at 0900 at lux?

you bit your lip. the pros of this: you could finally get closure. dick grayson was hard to get ahold of, but maybe this was your chance to ask him—why did the two of you not work? was it you? was it him? or was it his true first love, nightwing?

you: hey. does 0930 work? i’m out running errands right now.

a beat.

DICKIEBIRD 💙: yeah! miss u lots, btw. see you then!

two hours later, after you had dropped off matt’s life-sustaining seaweed chips for a disgruntled “thanks, babe” in return, you walked into lux, your favorite sweater and skirt combo clinging onto you like a second skin. you’d worn a different, light blue dress on instinct, but you quickly realized that the dress you had picked out was dick’s favorite, so it immediately out of the question. shame, it was a damn hot dress.

“hey!” you heard a cheery voice from behind you. he said your name like it came off easy, like you hadn’t been each other’s confidants once upon a time. he said your name the way you wished that you could say his, with no meaning attached behind it. “it’s been so long, and you look great!” his eyes flicked to the stone on your left hand ring finger, and you could swear that his face fell the smallest amount, but if he felt anything, he didn’t tell you.

you didn’t have the same self control that he did. his name fluttered off of your tongue like a prayer, like he was a god and your only chance at salvation. “dick… um… hi. yeah, you look great too, but i guess enough people tell you that on a daily basis.”

“well, i hope you’re getting complemented just as much. what, your fiancé not doing it for you anymore, or is that just a pretty rock?” he grinned, his dimples highlighted by the dim light in the club. you suddenly kicked yourself for even showing up. how could he read you like a book by only looking at you for a minute or two, max?

your eyes widened, heart beating out of your chest. “uh, i mean… i’m engaged. matt. that’s his name. matt myers.”

as if reading your mind, dick’s smile fell, and he placed a comforting hand on your forearm. “hey, i didn’t mean anything by the pretty rock comment, okay? don’t stress, i’m not here to seduce you.” oh, dick. what you’d give for him to say the opposite. “i’m actually here about a case. not bruce related, by the way. my usual case partner on this one is having a little trouble, so i thought…” he shrugged, because telling you that you were a backup didn’t break his heart, not like being on the receiving end broke yours. it wasn’t a shatter, just a tiny crack to the ones that he’d been adding all this time.

“yeah, i can help you out. what’s up?” you tried to seem nonchalant, but maybe the pain seeped through your voice. you wouldn’t count it against your terrible emotional regulation skills, but a small part of you was itching to help—to get back into the routine that truly sparked fire in you, instead of the rabbit food conversations that had matt jumping around like it was Christmas.

dick pulled out a variety of manila folders, labeled with a variety of female names on them, and a type of flower. he pinched three different photos of the victims, you were assuming, who were mauled and then arranged into neat shapes, with their hands crossed over their chest like mummies, and a clean, crisp white flower placed on top of them. the flowers were all different species’, you noted, with some including a white rose, a white poppy, and a white petunia.

“what do you have so far?” your voice came off far too eager, far too fast and far too interested. no, this was a favor he was coming to you for, so why did it feel like you were a caged bird that could finally sing, stretch it’s wings and soar into the sky without inhibitions? dick pressed his lips together, running a hand though his tousled, raven hair. god, what you’d give to have the chance to do that one more time. maybe dick was right when he broke up with you, because if you couldn’t even control yourself when you had a fiancé, how did he know that you could handle being with him?

he hesitated—it was evident in the way that he froze before trying to say something again. perhaps he was also thinking about the other times that you helped him with his cases, spending late nights poring over pictures and elaborate pictures, only to end up watching the real housewives of beverly hills instead. or maybe he was rethinking, questioning, even, why he had even involved you in the first place. you wouldn’t hold it against him; you’d always been too interested for your own good.

“close to nothing. no prints, no dna, just these flowers, whatever they mean. i wanted to know if you could reach out to shy of your sources—see if they know anything. they’ve been helpful before.” his voice sounded tired, not the usual, cheery voice he pasted onto himself. it made you feel a bit better, if you could call it that, that he didn’t feel the need to pretend to be the golden wayne child in front of you. or maybe you were delusional in your belief that he’d even let his facade drop.

you bit your lip, and twisted the dark blue engagement ring on your finger absentmindedly. “is this a nightwing problem, or an officer grayson problem? because that makes a difference in which sources i use.”

dick grinned, and you were mostly sure that it was genuine, with a flash of teeth distracting you from the issue at hand (which was more like the issue on your left hand ring finger) but dick had always had that effect on you. “thinking about breaking the law, future mrs gr—future pulitzer prize winner? to answer your question, if you think about it,” he started, “it’s a both problem.” his face fell, and the wide smile that was there moments ago disappeared so fast that you almost thought that you imagined it. “they’ve started personally targeting people in my family. cass and damian both noticed a tail when they were walking out in the city, and i would be worried if they weren’t, you know, the deadliest people in gotham, but if anything happened to them, i don’t know if i'd be able to forgive myself. or worse, alfred…”

the look on his face is anguished, as if he’s imagining a lifetime of pain being inflicted on his family, and you know that he’s rather take it himself than let anything happen to them. “dick, don’t worry, okay? alfred is probably more dangerous than anyone in your family combined, and i say that after i've met cass and steph. nothing’s going to happen to them. we’re going to find this psycho, then we’re going to get justice for the victims and their families.” you reach out to touch his arm, but the moment your skin makes contact with his, you pull back like his forearm was on fire.

nodding, he looks back up at you, his eyes filled with an admiration you haven’t seen in quite a while. “yeah, i’m overreacting, right? and it’s not like they won’t be able to defend themselves. cass could probably kick my ass on one of her bad days.” he shudders. “she’s awesome and all, but scary as hell.”

you laugh, finally at ease, not on edge about what you’re saying or about to do. “yeah, well, clearly you’ve never seen her in the same room as a full english breakfast. i remember this one time that she came over to our apartment after patrol, and this was at three o’clock in the morning, okay? she walks in, starts getting the eggs out of our fridge…” your eyes catch a glimpse at dick’s face. he’s smiling, his face satiated and truly… happy. how long has it been since you looked like that? the earlier morning comes into your mind, and you stammer, recollecting how you looked in the glass of the fridge at the store. like a broken woman rather than the girl that you used to be.

now it’s dick’s turn to take your hand into his, and rub it gently, the way that he always used to do when you were nervous before taking one of your tests in university, or when you utterly messed up cooking dinner. it meant that he was here for you, that he would be there no matter what, but a small part of your brain wanted to question him nonetheless; if he had left you before, he would leave you again. that was the rule, the past precedent that he had kept for himself, and if he had wanted to stay, he would’ve.

his thumb brushes over your engagement ring, the one that you and forgotten even existed and now felt heavier on your finger than a ton of bricks, the one that your fiancé had given to you as a token of trust. you couldn’t break the one promise you had left, but clearly, dick must have been thinking the same thing. he pulled his hand away the moment he touched the ring, and looked at you with a guilty expression. “so… how long have you guys been…”

“last night.” you said, not an ounce of warmth in your voice. there never was, when it came to matt. it was more like a dry tone of obligation than anything else.

dick’s eyes widened, shame seeping into his expression. “i'm so sorry, sw—i mean, you shouldn’t be here on your engagement day. we can talk some other time, or i can send you—”

“if i didn’t want to be here, dick, i wouldn’t be.”

“good to know.” he smiled, before turning his attention back to the folder in his hands. “hey, i have to go. we’ll keep in touch, alright?” he stands up, about to lean in for a hug, but you stick your arm out, ready to shake his hand. cold and impersonal, but it wasn’t like you were doing a good job of that in the first place.

the two of you settle for a half hug-half handshake combination, somehow making the situation more awkward than it already was. he send you a crooked grin, and it cements itself in your brain, another blip of dick grayson in your grey life. maybe… maybe this isn’t a bad idea after all, and maybe you could rein in your emotions just to see a little more of him, his dark blue eyes haunting your dreams like an apparition. you could sacrifice that and so much more just to have his eyes in your life.

“see you later, right?” you smiled, the muscles in your face contracting in that direction for the first time in a few weeks, perhaps. oh, the things that he did to your poor heart. he waved, mouthing a quick bye to you before picking up a call on his phone, and you could hear a stern ‘jason’ before he vanished, out of earshot, out of sight, but not out of your mind.

you started on your path back home, deciding against taking a taxi when the fares would be the highest. maybe it was just an eerie coincidence on your part, but you swore that there was something behind you, a pair of eyes tracking your every move. you would have cast it aside as paranoia, but it was sending a creeping shiver up your spine, terrifying you to your very bones. perhaps that is what happens when one works on a murder case.

you brushed it off, but the feeling of eyes on your back did not dissipate.

ooh spooky right? does anyone fancy a part two for this one or nah?

[partycatty]

Johnny cage and mayB some others being mind numbingly in love

Like they talk to reader and everytime just feel so stupid afterwards because theyre so in love and do stupid shit to impress

i love stupid men anon this works so well for me

johnny, raiden, kung lao, syzoth > stupid in love

warnings: big stupid hot sexy men (what else is new?), bojack horseman minor spoiler?? LMFOAMOF

+ bonus surprise character at the very end

masterlist

johnny >

• have you guys LMAO have you guys seen the. DLGHSDKJ the episode of bojack horseman where bojack gives diane the D in from the hollywood sign?? johnny is SO extra like that and for WHAT.

• OR YOU GUYS KNOW WHEN TODDLERS LIKE REALLY WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING AND THEY JUST KEEP SAYING "LOOKIT" LMFAFOIFMOA

• "reader, reader are you watching - reader, reader watch -" as he's like about to absolutely FUCK UP a nerds rope or some stupid shit

• okay i'll be fr. johnny is by far the most concerningly extra of the entire group. he will put himself in stupid danger just to impress you.

• "watch me take on all these guys at once!" he'll call out to you during your time at the academy, surrounded by a dozen monks. he's in a sling and bandages the next day.

• "kenshi, i bet you sento that i can jump from the roof like bi-han did!" BAM.

• he'd randomly give you expensive gifts out of absolutely nowhere. or he'd give his one of many glasses away to you because he "has no use for them" or they're "out of style" (he's lying, he just wants to see you wear something that's his).

• oh? you briefly mention you're a tad chilly during training? oh no, johnny's top fell off, i guess he has to give it to you now. you know, to stay warm. oh, you don't want his top? okay, here's a comically fluffy, expensive coat! and it just so happens to be your size...!

• lowkey i headcanon johnny as, despite being an actor, pretty blushy if someone matches his energy or really gets under his skin. you'll pass by him with a witty comment about his fighting style, or even just to tell him he cleaned up nice after getting his ass kicked by raiden. johnny just stands there with steam spitting from his red ears, hand on his chest as he fights a stupid grin.

• he is down ASTRONOMICALLY. not even the elder gods can stop this man from being so drunk in love when you're around. he makes it everyone's problem.

raiden >

• we see how flustered he gets when he's called out by kitana. he's a grown man with dick and balls but he's also flustered very easily! he'll be decently vocal about his affection for you, but then word trickles down to your ear, at which point it's so over for him.

• walks into walls when he's so entranced by you training. like face first into a wall, his hat fluttering to the ground. kung lao loses it.

• he can't even hear what you're saying when you speak to him, it sounds like an angel muffled by the clouds of heaven. raiden's also not the greatest with his powers granted by the amulet. if you go in to touch his arm playfully, a jolt of electricity pricks your palm and you yelp. raiden can only sputter apologies as he bows down, his cheeks tinted.

• he's the type to do little favors for you, ones you barely notice. your spot at the table is tidied, the training dummy is prepped for your fighting style, or he's the first one to bring you something if you forget it. that, and tiny favors to butter you up to him.

• "reader, you said you were nauseous last training. i prepared you some tea," he'd slide the small cup over to you, fighting a goofy smile. he rehearsed his script a few times, so he sounded more static than intended.

• will ask you questions about training or the weather just to hear your voice. he couldn't even recall what you were saying, he just loved the way your lips moved.

• kung lao pokes at him for this often, nudging him or making comments about you being his partner when you're not. raiden will stomp on his foot to keep him from talking about his infatuation if you're around. as if you don't already know.

kung lao >

• he's totally the bouncing on his heels type of man. he'll stare at you with a stupid grin, like a kid in a candy store.

• "was there something you needed, kung lao?" you'd ask as you tended to your own duties, organizing various equipment into baskets.

• "ah, no, not at all," he'd wave you off with a grin. "just enjoying... the view."

• you cringe at his words, chuckling to yourself as he speaks you in a daze. his mouth runs off before his brain can stop it from happening, so his biggest downfall with his crush is yapping. he'll sit there and explain his family history to you, or how much he hated farming cabbage, or his favorite meal at madam bo's just to keep you around long enough.

• kung lao always has this desire to keep you close by, so he continuously does stupid shit to keep you by his side. including but not limited to accidentally slicing his hands on his hat, one that he swore was a genius idea. in concept, probably.

• he wants to impress you so bad. SO BAD. anything he does is deserving of a bragging right if he's the one to do it. lao would totally try to shrug it off so you could gas him up more. any compliment, forced or not, was music to his ears.

• "yeah, i totally beat raiden," he'll check his nails nonchalantly as he leans against the wall, telling you the story of the cabbage competition for dinner against his best friend. "really swept him."

• "that's just not true," raiden would try to interject when he heard lao's version of the story. kung lao just holds eye contact with you, grinning, as he shoves raiden aside by his face.

syzoth >

• im sorry IM SORRY BUT I JUST LOVE THE HC THAT HIS TAIL WAGS I KNOW THATS NOT HOW THAT WORKS JUST- JUST BEAR WITH ME.

• you hear thumping when you're around, though you're never able to find out where it's coming from, so you chalk it up to the monks landing blows against the wooden dummies.

• but the sound lingers when you're at dinner. the table is... rattling.

• you look up to see if anyone else notices or if you were hit too hard during training. but, you see everyone staring past you. just down the table, syzoth is sitting with a pile of bugs on his plate, his tail thumping in and out of view.

• "syzoth," kenshi will gently say, leaning into his ear to whisper something. syzoth flushes a green tint and tries to resume to his meal, the bugs scurrying out of his chopsticks as he struggles to keep it together.

• out of respect for his dignity, you hold your tongue at his obvious affection. syzoth tries to keep it under wraps but he can't help it when you're just so cute!

• he'll stand close by you, inching closer and closer until you notice. he'll slip you little trinkets and flora with a small smile. anything from a rock that matches the shades of your eye, to a flower he picked by the gardens, to a stick. a nice stick, to be fair! you wonder if this is zaterran courtship.

• "it reminded me of you," he'd lean into your ear. your bedside table is decorated with various... outside decor.

BONUS! kitana >

• kitana knew she couldn't get entangled with the umgadi after seeing how risky mileena is with tanya, but my god were you breathtaking.

• you would often accompany her in the carriages as she waved to her people, eyes transfixed on her. you're devoted to her protection. it is your god-given duty. your eye contact was too much at times, and kitana would often catch herself staring at you, her hand suspended in the air. she'd forget to wave.

• "is everything alright, my princess?" you would ask innocently, in a low tone to avoid raising suspicion. kitana's mind short circuits when you call her... yours. even if you're referring to the umgadi's worship. she shakes her head and clears her throat, pulling her mask up higher to conceal her blush.

• if she were to give speeches on her mother's behalf or otherwise, she'd find herself forgetting what the rehearsed, or hell, struggling to rehearse. you were the one she'd come to for help with speeches, yet you made things ten times harder when you'd lean in to listen to her better. it makes her mind absolutely numb.

• "and you tell me to steer away from the umgadi," mileena would rasp into her ear as the sister sat on their thrones, you positioned by her side and eyes forward. "it seems you picked a favorite, sister."

• "i'm not the only guilty one," she'd hiss back to her sister, nodding at tanya. "it won't get in the way of duties, as long as mother doesn't know."

• you'd fight to netherrealm and back for your princess. as you fight off intruders or threats, kitana forgets to escape, instead transfixed on the way your muscles would contract and flex with each blow.

• she wants to be the one to care for your wounds. the power imbalance means nothing to her, you're her equal.

[hangup119]

FEELS LIKE A THRILLER! ᯓᡣ𐭩

07. boy best friend activities written chapter | 1.1k words

“ANTON, YOU'RE AWAKE!” you cry out as soon as you look up from your phone, coming face-to-face with the aforementioned man who looks like he has seen better days. Anton currently sits above a patch of grass on Giselle's front yard, hands gripping his phone while Seunghan silently stands beside him, worriedly looking over him after the former had suddenly rolled off of his back while being carried.

“Guys… ugh,” Anton says, blinking slowly. “I’m so sleepy…” 

He’s about to say something else, but ends up slumping against Seunghan’s leg instead.

You sigh. Earlier, you had just been bickering with Seunghan over his inane obsession with Pokemon Go, like something possessed you to chastise your longtime crush on his interests when it was the first time in years that you’ve properly interacted with each other. But even if you kept squawking about the fact that he cut you off over a pixelated animal appearing on his phone screen like the major nerd he is, Seunghan’s protests were humorous in nature, taking no offense at all, and even asking if you wanted to catch it instead. 

(“Why the hell should I!?” you ask, looking at him incredulously. “Do I look like I give a rat’s ass about Pokemon—“ 

Seunghan hands you his phone, where the screen shows Snorlax dumbly looking out into the open with the pokeball right in front. “C’mon,” he drags, “don’t worry, I won’t blame you if you waste my balls. Just catch him.” 

He’s grinning, and he’s so close, and you… realize you can’t really say no to such a face.

… Stupid fucking Pokemon Go.

“Don’t say it like that,” you groan, moving closer to touch his screen. Not knowing much of the mechanics, you just drag the pokeball and unceremoniously throw it at the Snorlax. “Fine, I’ll catch your stupid Snorlax.”

Seunghan just laughs.)

And while the two of you kept squabbling over the game, what you failed to notice was the incoming figure staggering towards you from the front door, only to end up falling face-first on the grass just a few meters away. It was only when Seunghan stopped responding to you that you finally noticed the unfortunate Anton on the ground, immediately screeching out his name in the dead of the night.

And Anton, who obviously reeked of cheap alcohol, just murmured a simple “goodnight” before passing out.

And now you’re here. 

“What do we do now?” Seunghan dumbly asks, awkwardly looking down at the still-inebriated Anton clinging to his leg. “He won’t budge. I feel like I’m dealing with a little kid. A six-foot kid.” 

You shrug, crouching down in front of your friend. For someone so tall, he looks surprisingly small right now. “Hello, Earth to Anton?” you wave your hand in front of his face. “You okay, buddy? You smell like shit, by the way; what’d they give you back there?” 

You look towards Giselle’s house, noting how the door still hasn’t opened yet with Eunseok stalking towards you like Anton’s personal guardian angel. He did say Anton was his responsibility for the night as he’s the one driving him home, but you seriously can’t deny the fact that you just wished Eunseok would hurry it up so you can continue having your precious alone time with Seunghan. 

You look back at the aforementioned man and sighed. Stupid Anton, why’d he have to ruin your moment with Seunghan? He’s supposed to be your wingman now that the tides have changed! 

At least… that was supposed to be the case, but didn’t Seunghan just recently go on a date with a girl from your class? One personally recommended by Eunseok himself? 

God, Eunseok is so dead to you, you thought darkly. You don’t even really know the guy!

Anton blinks wearily, before letting go of Seunghan’s poor leg. He yawns, rubbing his eye with one hand, looking back at you, then at Seunghan, then back to you. You look at him curiously, wondering what’s working inside that mysterious brain of his, before he says:

“You guys are so cute.” 

There’s a pause after that, and then…

“Huh—” you don’t even get to finish your sentence before he’s flopping down towards you, nuzzling into the crook of your neck. “Anton, what the hell!” you screech, feeling heat rise to your face not because of his close proximity but mainly because of his silly little commentary. 

You turn to face the bemused Seunghan standing above the two of you, sputtering out: “Help me…!?”

But the fucker just snaps a picture instead, teasingly saying, “No, you guys are cute.”

You feel your whole world shatter into pieces.

“Oh, nah, nah,” Anton starts, rising from his position, “we’re just friends—”

“Eww!” you cut him off, shoving him away. 

He lands against Seunghan again, wordlessly staring back at you with his mouth open. Seunghan blinks at your sudden outburst.

“No, absolutely not,” you spiral into a rant, “he is so ugly, this filthy creature! Why is he even born? Why does he walk this Earth with me? I would never look at him with my own two eyes heissouglyohmygosh.” 

Eunseok arrives at the scene after you finish with your little breakdown, jogging towards you and stopping just a few centimeters away. “I finally got away from Sungchan! Hey, is—” 

He stops, taking note of the tense silence between the three of you. “Uh… are you guys okay?”

Anton starts sobbing loudly, still drunk off his ass. “Y/N hates me,” he wails at his grown age, “she won’t buy me Gundam anymore.” 

Seunghan pats his back comfortingly, and Anton clings to him until they’re embracing each other. “She probably doesn’t mean that, bro. It’s okay, Anton,” he says, though he doesn’t look entirely convinced of himself either. 

You cringe. You messed up.

Eunseok turns to you. “What’d you do to him?” he asks, exasperated and unsure if he really wants to know. 

You step closer towards Anton and Seunghan, carefully saying, “Forgive me, Anton… I didn’t mean all of that. You’re not ugly. You—You’re cool, alright? … C’mon, dude, we’ve known each other since eighth-grade and I know for a fact that you’ve had a massive glow up since then. I’m sorry, okay? Please stop crying now; I can’t afford Gundam but I can pay half the price for one. Also, why are you drunk in the first place? You’re not even twenty-one yet...”

“That’s what I’m saying!” Eunseok huffs, crossing his arms. “It was probably Wonbin.” 

Seunghan expectantly looks at Anton, gently breaking apart their hug. Anton remains silent, but at least he finally paused his obnoxious crying. 

You apprehensively meet his gaze. “So…?” you ask meekly. “What do you say, ‘ton?” 

Anton takes a deep breathe, before—

“… I’ll forgive you if you and Seunghan go on a date,” he states firmly.

You nearly fall on your back. 

“What?” You, Eunseok, and Seunghan practically scream at him. 

previous | masterlist | next

SUMMARY. pining after hong seunghan has always felt like an unachievable reality; however, just a few months into your first year of college, it seems that the gods have finally listened to your prayers when news breaks out that your long-time crush is single once again.

AUTHOR'S NOTE. i hope u guys get that tiktok reference orz ... prolly not

TAGLIST. @shguacamole @miyawwn @starwonb1n @hwadejectedyoung @revehosh @alwayswook @snowyseungs @rksbae @emohoon @nujeskz @ilovejungwonandhaechan @meowbini @nakam00t

[thebest-medicine]

May I request lee bakugo + bakusquad + midoriya + 92: “Hey are you guys okay? I heard yelling (from the hall / outside) and— oh.”

Explosively Ticklish [part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6]

Prompt 92 - “Hey are you guys okay? I heard yelling from the hall / outside and— oh.”

A/N: gang tickling for my sweet sweet stubborn lee Bakugo ?? <3 1000 kisses for you anon. This one uhhh.. got longer than expected. So it’s under a cut (~850 words) [continued, part 2]

…

“Hey are you guys okay? I heard yelling from the hall and— oh.” He freezes.

Bakugo looks up at him with a searing glare, his entire face red and his eyes scrunched in what almost appears to be …mirthful.

Deku stares, blinks.

Kaminari, Kirishima, Sero, and Ashido stare back at him for a beat. Then, they burst into laughter, continuing what they were doing before he interrupted, which appears to be trying to pin Bakugo to the floor.

Midoriya comes back to himself in time to see Kirishima and Sero pinning Bakugo’s hands up high above his head as he screeches at them to ‘fuck off’ to no avail.

“W-what are you doing?” Izuku asks, dumbfounded. “Are you…?”

“This blasty jerk has tickled us for the last time! It’s time we got our revenge!” Mina decrees.

“Shut up!” Bakugo yells in response. “Get off me!” He tugs at his now pinned arms. “—Stupid! Won’t even work!”

Izuku giggles at that, taking a step closer before he even thinks about it. “That’s pretty wishful thinking, Kacchan.” He snickers quietly and leans down.

“Nonono fuck off, nerd!” Katsuki hisses as Deku approaches. Bakugo sputters, barely holding in a laugh when he realizes Mina and Denki each have a leg pinned down and they’re reaching his knees to squeeze and tickle. Deku kneels beside them, smiling with a hint of a blush under his freckles. Two more hands join in - Hanta and Ejirou - poking under his arms. “Fuck you guys! D-Don’t!” He whines, biting his lip.

“Ha! Not ticklish, my ass!” Kirishima cheers, digging in more to try and get a bigger reaction. Katsuki is tense, his eyes squeezing shut now. He holds his breath.

Izuku presses his fingers in a hesitant wiggle against Kacchan’s stomach, which sucks in slightly at the touch.

“Mmmnnnn-” Bakugo grunts, shaking his head as he struggles against his friends and the laughter bubbling in his chest. “Pff-nnnno—”

“Aww, you’ll feel better if you just laugh, Kacchan~.” Deku teases, gaining confidence in both his voice and tickling. His fingers skate across Bakugo’s middle as he jerks minutely side to side.

Bakugo shakes his head vehemently, growling to cover up a stray laugh. “Stop!” It comes out so high pitched and bubbly that it doesn’t sound like Bakugo at all.

“Not yet, big guy.” Sero says, scratching over to Katsuki’s neck, getting a scrunch for his efforts.

“Awww, he’s totally breaking!” Mina asserts, looking over her shoulder. “I’m gonna try his feet!” She leans forward just as Bakugo scrunches his toes. “How bout it, Blasty? Ticklish here?”

“No!” He can only safely respond with one syllable at a time, it seems.

Kaminari follows her lead, leaning down to grab Bakugo’s other foot. They each try to pry back the respective toes of their captive foot — successfully, much to Bakugo’s distress. When two sets of nails start scratching the balls of his feet, Bakugo shouts again. This time, it could almost be called a shriek.

“Come on, don’t worry, you can be ticklish and still be manly.” Kirishima assures his friend with a smirk, tickling more intently under his arm now.

Izuku takes a few moments looking over Kacchan’s body, seeing what the others are doing. They’re close. He smiles softly and positions both of his hands right at the bottoms of Bakugo’s ribs. He squeezes the bones gently, wiggling his fingers.

“HA-noOO! Shahahaddup! Nohoho! Fuhuhuhuck!” Katsuki swears as the ballooning laughter inside of his forces its way out. It’s all too much to hold back. There’s too many of them. They’re doing too many things. It’s too many spots. His brain fuzzes over like he’s taken a few too many loose volts from Dunce Face. He hears mirthful laughter, and realizes a second later it’s coming from him. Though, the others are laughing too, somewhere beyond him, unreachable.

“Ha! Oh my gosh! Your laugh is soooo cute!” Mina cheers, still tickling away. She’s trying to pry her way under his toes.

“Seriously, I can’t believe I was scared of you a few months ago!” Denki chides, tickling over the top of his foot. “Listen to that giggle!”

“Fuhuhuhuhuhu- hahaha k-ha off!” Bakugo wheezes between laughs.

“Seriously, we have to get you back more often.” Sero beams down at him, tickling between his armpits and his upper ribs, which really seem to get him going.

“That’s for sure!” Kirishima smiles, shark-like.

Izuku laughs lightly along with them, tickling random spots along Kacchan’s ribs and stomach. He pokes at his bellybutton and hips a few times, getting plenty of squirming for his efforts. Bakugo shouts empty threats through his laughter, squeaking and embarrassed until his friends finally have pity on him after a while of exacting their revenge. They’ll all pay for this. That for sure. But they’ll enjoy it while it lasts! That’s for sure too!

…

[more sentence starter fic prompts]

[other sentence starter fics]

[read this & further MHA drabbles on ao3]

[samicakes-exe]

hii can i request your regular jeff the killer headcanons? :) they don’t have to be smutty

Hello! thank ya for requesting! honestly, i should get aroundto posting all of my creeps head cannons but Jeffy boy is a good start! hope you enjoy!!

also please suggest any other peeps you want headcanons for!

<3 Wordcount: 605 words! so a quick read <3

𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕖𝕣𝕒𝕝 𝕁𝕖𝕗𝕗 𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕂𝕚𝕝𝕝𝕖𝕣 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤!!!

warnings: will include smut head canons at the end so be warned. Other than that just Jeff being a loveable ass!

𝕊𝔽𝕎 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤:

okay, let's get this out of the way. he's an asshole.

an asshole who cares mainly about the people he loves.

STILL he's a douche sometimes.

he's not very showy when it comes to his more romantic side. Hell, he struggles to say I love you in front of others and definitely isn't going to admit how fond he is of you to anyone else, even to Liu.

but he is very observant-

He listens, taking notes on what you like. Oh? you mentioned you like a specific type of cookie- there are 10 boxes in the cupboards the following morning.

Oh? you like wearing his clothes, here take a hoodie. (he would be very nonchalant about the situation and if you prod any deeper he would deny deny deny. getting annoyed but still handing you the hoodie.)

he has his sweet moments but still, he's more of a cocky narcissist

handsy too (he will never leave your ass alone!)

my dude is 5'10 on a good day but will totally round it up to 6 foot. He likes being taller than you

if you are 5'10 n up. Well prepare for him to show off his strength instead.

"Give me your hand."

"What?"

"I can beat you in arm wrestling. Give me your hand!"

Of course, you let him win, cuz if not he would challenge you to a race. (like a goddamn middle schooler)

He is quite toned but still built lanky

this man can surprisingly cook decent enough and if you're lucky he will cook for you

ONLY SOMETIMES again with the whole not showing any romantic affection thing

he's a little nerd since before the whole randy, troy, keith thing. He was a quiet kid and ya know quiet kids tend to be nerds n stuff!

he's defintely a nerd when it comes to rock and metal bands.

he has a couple of band tees def.

he doesn't know how to drive- also he's a passenger princess.

ℕ𝕊𝔽𝕎 ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤:

minors get out right now!

so we all know this man is kinky in bed, of course!

one huge thing with him is def a knife kink. he absolutely gets off on the fear in your eyes when he presses one of his trusty knifes against your throat. how you tremble underneath him, feeds his massive ego.

he will definitely press it harder while he is fucking into you, he loves seeing you like this underneath him, also loves knowing that you would do this only for him.

he loves ruining you

he has a blood kink of course and will totally fuck you on your period.

his dick is 6 inches and pretty thick, slight curve to the left.

and he knows how to use it.

IF you're into it. Def let him carve his initials into you and watch him go absolutely feral.

he was already into marking with hickeys and bites, but this is like marriage to him i guess.

you're fully his now.

not only is he a passenger princess- his favorite position is reverse cowgirl.

he loves watching you ruin yourself on top of him and sometimes he will thrust up against your increasingly sloppier bounces.

his fingers roughly rubbing your clit

all the while whispering the filthiest things he can muster in your ear:

"cum all over my cock, doll"

"that's right, doll. go stupid on my cock, sweetheart. let me fuck your little brains out."

"you like my knife pressing into your thigh? makes your little clitty throb~"

his aftercare is surprisingly sweet, kissing all over you while he holds you close.

sometimes leaving marks as well, plays back to his whole ownership kink.

there it is! it is rough. i barely edited it so please enjoy. if you didn't like it umm- im sorry :(

[thefloatingstone]

How would you compare Presley's racism vs Ashley's racism. Although now that I type this at least Presley never compared them animals. Hmmm...

Honestly it's all down to "root cause" and "how they express it".

Pressly is a veteran of the first contact war who was shooting at these people less than 30 years ago. His racism has its roots in a perspective forged during wartime and all the baggage THAT drags up. But we get clear and straightforward addressing of Pressly growing out of his racism by his own words, remarking in his log "Reading back on my older entries, what a damn fool I've been."

Ashley on the other hand may have similar baggage, as her grandfather is a disgraced military man and caused her entire family to be blacklisted because of the First Contact War with the aliens, and that would be a similar place to draw her prejudice from and help her grow out of by realising her true feelings of anger and resentment are misplaced. But the way she voices her racism is full of venom and true, deep seeded contempt and hatred. Comparing them to animals is the big one, and ME2 itself mocks her for this comment if she died on Virmire. But it's more than that. Ashley's entire personality is that of "High School Mean Girl". The second Liara steps on board of the Normandy Ashley is GUNNING to bully her. Not just because she's an alien but ALSO for being "one of those lesbian sluts". (reminder, in ME1 Liara is an extremely shy and awkward historian and archaeologist)

When Shepard tells Ashley to NOT bully Liara for being an Asari, Ashley straight up says "No fun, Commander >:("

Also there's this line which some people miss because it requires you to have the discussion with Liara about the Prejudice and racism Asari face galaxy wide and then going directly to Ashley and speaking to her)

(the clip starts at 2:44)

idk if I said it here or if I said so in discord to a friend, but I see kaidan and Ashley as being written as the answers to Bioware's handling of Renegade and Paragon options. Kaidan is more geared to reflect a Paragon playthrough and Ashley is more geared to fit a renegade playthrough. Possibly the thinking was whichever way the person is playing, it would affect who they decide to spare on Virmire.

(also I have a good relationship with my family but Ashley going "WHAT DOES SHE MEAN SHE DOESN'T LIKE HER MOM???? THAT'S STUPID." comment also makes me really fucking angry considering how many irl friends I have who have moms who suck ass)

Pressly's racism is problematic (same as Garrus' racism in the first game) but he outgrows it and openly says "I was wrong."

Garrus has a full on conversation with Tali in ME3 and directly says to her "I'm sorry and I was wrong."

Ashley never apologises or excuses her early comments and behaviour. She just at some point stops doing it so overtly and comments how "no I like Tali a lot" (Everybody likes Tali) as if this somehow undoes everything she said. More than anything, she tries to justify and excuse her past comments and opinions while also saying the most hateful things about the crew.

She's a racist bully from a heavily religious traditional military family who makes no effort to understand people from family structures or upbringing she doesn't understand, alien or otherwise, who immediately started picking on the shy nerd the SECOND she stepped foot on the ship and never apologises for any of her actions, racist or otherwise.

The racism is a symptom of a much nastier whole.

She's a VERY well written character. I just heavily dislike her.

[subarashiihibi]

my thing about izaya is that he's so strange and weird and i love that so much. i didn't want to ramble too much in the notes of that poor person's post but i find the way he speaks and the words he chooses so interesting so let me ramble a little bit. this may or may not even be coherent so bear with me here im just going to speak my thoughts.

ok this got really fucking long and all over the 0place so im putting this under a read more sorry.

so i have volume 9 of the novel in both english and japanese. i only have two novels in japanese and that is this one and yuuyake wo. so i'm pretty crazy about this izaya speech analysis shit. anyways i was rereading thru the jp ver the other day just to compare it to the eng and i kinda realized that like.

a lot of people you can separate their speech in either formal and informal speech right? someone like shizuo speaks really informally and uses a lot of rough, dragged-out versions of words and stuff (しゃーねえ vs しょうがない) and then someone like shinra who speaks in a ton of yojijukugo and generally sounds like a nerd emoji gijinka.

izaya on the other hand rly... doesn't fit in either? i mean sure he sounds like another nerd emoji gijinka but it's kinda different. it's not so much the words he speaks but rather the intonation and his tone...

and he has his moments where he speaks pretty seriously and whatnot of course, but in general he just... doesn't sound very human when he speaks? i don't know if that's a conscious effort or not. is it his attempts at distancing himself from his own individual humanity? or is it just because he's a weird guy? i dunno. but it's interesting nonetheless.

one thing i will note though is that despite his somewhat inhuman speech patterns, it's also pretty...dramatic? to the extent where it's really exaggerated but also very cute and charming. (this part is important.)

i think a lot of what makes izaya's speech so weirdly inhuman is because he doesn't really use a lot of slang or similar lingo that people his age would typically use. i know mikado said in the novels that he doesn't really try to fit in with his age group's fashion sense either so it makes sense but still. he's like an old hag it's so funny. and it's because of that that when he says stuff like 'i don't get all hot and heavy over headless women' or whatever he said to celty it's really amusing to me because like... why is the strange man saying this?💀

another example i kinda giggled about on my twitter when i read it it's not even crazy and i sound corny and cheesy and stupid but theres this scene in vol 9 where izaya messages celty for business and hold on let me just put it as a quote.

he sounds so old saying 'video game' like 😭 idk it's just funny cause he barely even knows anything abt games like bro knows nothing im crying

in the jp hes like 「…ゲーム中なのかい？」 and then when celty tries to explain herself he says 「何を言ってるのか、良く解らないんだけど」 and im rly bad at tling parts of sentences and stuff but just know that the way he words it makes it sound like this gif to me

i love both versions i think the original jp makes him sound like hes so lost and confused (hence why pw gif cause lord that man always looks lost LMFAOOOO) and then eng tl just blunt ass "I don't know what you're talking about." makes him sound like full on hag 😭😭😭

OMFG WAIT I HAVE TO MENTION THIS FUCKING SCENE WITH SHINRA ITS SO FUNNY.

first i think it's funny the translation has izaya say fuck here cause he very rarely swears and i did read this one thing about how he only swears when his mask slips so to me this is like genuine bewilderment that he cant even hide LOL. second why is he so excited to hear about 'whatever sexual fetish' shinra has im crying he's so damn nosy . okay but this is not the funniest part let me add that now.

???

ehy the hell is izaya orihara talking about foot fetishes???😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 im crying bruh i was so flabbergasted when i read this i was like WHAT did he just say? he says it in the jp ver too which just makes it even funnier. this goes back to what i said earlier but i always get so amused when izaya has something to say about sex or whatever cause he's so fucking weird and unsettling why does he know that

(i mean i also get so hard i nearly pass out thinking about izaya tlaking about sex but thats probably just a thing with my heart condition and stuff)

oh also another scene i think is really cute and amusing and funny is back when shinra was first still trying to get izaya to form the bio club w him.

1. shinra is funny as fuck in this scene but also izaya's "Hmm. Can I punch you?" made me havbe a good laugh. in the jp he says 「んー。殴ってもいいのかな？」 which is pretty much the same thing just with the intonation of like 'hmmmmmmmmm should i hit u or not...' sorry like i said im just bad w explaining this stuff. but i felt the need to point it out not cause im one of those annoying ppl who praise the original jp ver and reject translations and localizations i just think it's important for izaya specifically cause i love him and i want to analyze his speech patterns as best as i can.

i was going thru the novel just now for other stuff i wanted to mention and i forgot abt this part but it's so funny.

'Let's not get hasty. Type calmly, please.' its not even funny or nothing i just find it so amusinf whenever he talks like that💀 i will say though the english translation kind of makes him sound more weird and inhuman than the original. that line in the original was basically just him telling her she needs to calm down enough to at least type properly LOL. idk if im just being nitpicky cause this is izaya tho so feel free to ignore that. fwiw i like the eng tl bc while it's a different intonation than the original japanese ver i think if he did speak english it would probably sound smth like that anyways.

this too made me laugh like ??? seriously he is really nosy when it comes to people's intimate affairs. in the jp ver he calls them an 'intimate couple' which just is like .. ok bro💀

does anyone else see my vision of izaya getting cucked by celty (does it count as cucking when celtys the one dating shinra) while he looks sad and pathetic and miserable that he never decided to shoot his shot w shinra back in the day

if i were commenting on the actual stuff going on in this scene rn this post would be a lot olonger and even more terribly all over the place so im just gonna focus on how i think it's funny izaya says 'easy, man...' this is like one of the only times his words are somewhat natural and sound like smth you would hear someone else say. in the jp ver it's 「おいおい…」 which is somewhat less out of left field in terms of coming from izaya but still it's pretty surprisingly normal. i have to wonder if in that moment he's too worried about shinra to care about keeping up appearances.

this is just random and me making fun of izaya as usual but why the hell does he weigh himself after his showers💀💀💀 it's cute and endearing and only adds to his strong gap moe but still... it's strange...

speaking of cute things this is from a volume i forget but he says this one phrase a couple of times and it is just both really cute and also kind of idk... saddening. one of the times i can remember he says it is when namie was making fun of him or something and he replies 'Don't tease me. I'm only human.' or something along those lines and it's like . hm. ok.

i think it's cute he says 'dont tease me' a few times cause eughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh (trying to ward off severe brain damaged incoherent thoughts) but 'im only human' is like... are you really? even after you try so hard to escape your own humanity and individual self so much... im going to try and give my thoughts on it here but this is just based off my hc that izaya has bpd so yanno. im basing a lot oif this on my own experiences sorry. i do that a lot. (gestures over to all the posts i make abt fob/mychem fan izaya)

when it comes to just straight up acknowledging his humanity izaya has no problems with this because 'sure, i'm human. isn't that obvious?' is probably something along the lines of what he thinks. it's easy for him to just say that because it's just that. it's just words. it holds no real meaning and shows no true insight into how he actually perceives himself. but when it comes to actually having to come face to face with his own humanity and the fact that yes, he is only human, it's a lot more difficult because now it's out of his control. i wonder also if he has problems with perceiving his own self.

i say this a lot but i truly do believe izaya is so so so beautiful and i love him so much. also i just saw a funny post on twitter so i wanna say this here idk if yall know this but izayas actually a latina hes got chismosavirus❤ ok thats all i have to say sorry for rambling so much

[badtzbot]

sigh. go on then. drake.

i knew you cared about me....

How I feel about this character

my emotions about him are generally divided into 5 categories:

lust - not gonna get into it too much because this is tumblr not twt but uhhhh. he's 7 foot 8 inches. he's a dinosaur zoan.... he has a hybrid form. he has really good tits thighs and ass. all i'm saying is that i need him carnally

sobbing emojis - HIS FUCKING BACKSTORY OMFG. GODS. literally IM DEAD. i hope diez barrels is put through hell two billion times. i have extended headcanons about his time as an abused kid. i'm so so happy he was rescued. i can't believe he was nineteen there he was so small. im so glad that he's grown up now and (probably at least somewhat) recovered. i need the barrels pirates to be executed.

need to coddle him - i need to make him take a week off where he does nothing but experience joy. i want him to get over his trauma. i'm booking him a therapy session. im spooning him and washing his hair until he cries because he's never felt intimacy like that. i need him to be happy

need to bully him - his name is so stupid. "x drake" but it's pronounced "diez drake." he's a huge nerd about reptiles and ASTROPHYSICS. he's so large and so pathetic. he's a huge dweeb. he blushes and faints easily. he's weak to boobs. he's like if a mommas boy didnt have a momma. sengoku adopted him and he defected from the main marine force. he went undercover as a pirate and trafalgar clocked him in 0.2 secs as a narc. his pirate outfit is all leather which is both very distracting to me and very difficult to move in. he dual wields weapons that aren't normally dual wielded. his hair is the stupidest thing i've ever seen. he's a ginger. what is up with that weird ass pirate mask. his ship is literally just a painted over marine ship. i can't believe this guy he's such a dweeb

overwhelming love - i love him so much he's sweetie cutie of all time. i love him. he's 7'8. he's a dinosaur man. he faints when he sees boobs. i have only one figure and it's of him. he has such a strong moral compass. he's head of sword. he believes in real justice. he loves chicken and he hates eggs. he has two different birthdays. in the real world he would be a zookeeper. i LOVE HIM SO MUCH

he is my most specialest guy of all time.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

smoker, mostly. koby a little

My non-romantic OTP for this character

his relationship with the rest of SWORD in general is so cute. also putting drake and paulie in a room together has a lot of comedic potential because why are they Like That.

My unpopular opinion about this character

idk what the popular opinions about him are. that hes ugly? i agree tho he is a little bit ugly. but i still love him. ummmmm idk. the unpopular opinion is that i like him at all

oh also not a fan of drake and law? idk i just don't think law would fuck marines. except for One of them

also i don't think he's a daddy dom. he's my pathetic little princess

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

can i just get more of him in general. can we leave one piece and go to "life of diez drake" instead. that would be really good for me

[mandokero-eboy]

Baldur's Gate 3

Two whole hours of gameplay and I made no progress on the main story except trying to romance everyone. That was great.

Lae'Zel was like: YES, YOU SMELL OF BATTLE, ME HORNY, DO NOT FUCKING SHOWER YOU MUSKY MINX

Karlach was like: Hey uuuh... so... i know... i'm like... a 6 foot tall muscle baddie but... can i like... can we... uh And I was like "YOU. ME. BED. NOW."

Astarion was like: God this party sucks, wanna have a little fun? And I was like "What u mean?" And he was like "SEX. IDIOT. DO YOU. WANT. TO FUCK?"

Shadowheart was like: "Damn remember those times we fucked before? That was nice, we should do that again, btw the fact everyone else here is trying to fuck you is A-Okay with me"

Halsin was like: "IF I TOUCH A SINGLE DROP OF ALCOHOL YOUR PANTS AND MY PANTS WILL BE OFF. WE SHALL FUCK LIKE ANIMALS AT YOUR EARLIEST CONVENIENCE... Not tonight though." (If you know you know)

Gale would not stop talking to me about books, and his mutant cat, and his tragic past, and when I brought up the possibility of boning him he was like "awww you don't mean that" and said some wizard shit about pondering his orb and I wanted to jump his bones right there, stupid sexy nerd.

And I legit forgot Wyll existed and he mostly brooded about being a devil now (get over it you fucking wimp).

This was all in a single night. Which ended with having sex with Astarion, the other option was Karlach but she can't touch me yet because plot, so we went with Astarion. And he TOPPED ME. I LET THIS BROODING LITTLE TWINKIE LOOKING FUCK TOP ME (this apparently depends on your character's body type).

This right here was the single toughest decision of my entire life.

Then there were a lot of other cutscenes about Astarion brooding about Vampire stuff. Sasuke talkin ass. Edward from twilight lookin ass. I love him, I can't believe I let this man top me.

Also that unrestricted polyamory mod is really coming through for me.

[tobiasdrake]

Between the hair-trigger minion execution and all surviving 'loyalists' getting Feed Me Seymour'ed...ya think this was basically Vamdemon's plan for every follower the whole time, and all Angewomon + the other 7 chosen did was speed things up?

I don't think he intended to be killed by Angewomon, but I do think he rerailed it back to the original plan afterwards. The stuff about devouring all of his remaining forces, evolving into an Ultimate stage, eating everyone in Odaiba, and then merging the two worlds? I think that was the plan from the get-go.

I feel confident saying that the prophecy was his endgame. Gennai pulled it out of his ass like the morning of, but we already know Vamdemon was way better at research and ancient lore than him. Vamdemon's a complete and utter nerd. He studied everything in advance. I have no doubt he found the prophecy and was like, "Mm, life goals!"

He also has a few lines that hint that he's setting up for the VenomVamdemon stuff. For instance, when the adults are all put to sleep, they're described as a meal for later. He could just mean he's going to come back and snack on their blood once he's done killing Hikari, but given the context of the VenomVamdemon two-parter, it's clear to me that he was preparing them for his ascension.

Similarly, when whining at Angewomon about his goals, he refers to it as his destiny. He was destined to merge the realities and rule over them as their king. This implies that he isn't acting on his own accord, but trying to follow what a cosmic script told him to do. Like, perhaps, the prophecy Gennai found.

But I don't think being executed by angelic justice was in the plan. In fact, I think that screwed him pretty hard. I don't think VenomVamdemon was his endgoal necessarily; VenomVamdemon is a bestial creature with barely any cognition left. Not exactly fit to govern a merged reality, even evilly. His dominion would probably just be him wandering the landscape, randomly blowing shit up.

My personal theory is that BelialVamdemon was what he was supposed to become. Powerful, savage, and unstoppable... but also still brilliant and cunning, with no drawbacks. Still capable of plan-making and danger-recognition and prioritization of targets, none of which VenomVamdemon seemed to have.

I think Angewomon fucked him up so hard that it screwed up his endgame. His spirit, his wraithy form, lived on but it was barely more than a mindless beast, and that influenced the Ultimate form he ascended to in a way he hadn't intended. Thanks to PicoDevimon nudging him along the rails, he survived and grew strong off the plan he had made when he was still fully sapient, but he lost in his mind in the process.

And also he was now too stupid to realize he shouldn't eat PicoDevimon when PicoDevimon's the only one of them still capable of thinking things through. I can't imagine he got much of a power boost off the little shit. Shot himself in the foot because he became a beast man made of pure hunger.

[chriskotthoff]

Lets Talk About Battletech

Felt like gushing about the one sci-fi series that I have always nerded out over, so lets talk about big stompy robot and one of the last bastions of the real-robot mecha sub-genre in this cyberpunk world we now live in.  

My introduction to Battletech was the Animated series that aired for one season in 1994. It was far from the best cartoon, mostly serving as a meme generator for the current fandom. Exo-Squad was on their second season by that time and had superior animation and story telling but there was something about Battletech that kept me and my friends talking about it. That something was the Battletech universes itself. As flawed as the cartoon was, it did a great job summing up the Inner Sphere in it’s 60 second intro. The show leaves out a lot but if it’s mission was a simple introduction, sampler to the much broader Battletech Universe, mission accomplished.

After the cartoon ended, my buddies found the Battletech novel series at the local book store, that lead us to find the Battletech 3rd edition table top game and in 1995, Activsion published MechWarrior 2: 31st Century Combat. After that, I was unapologetic Battletech nerd.

What was it that made me fall in love with the game? Allot of little things. The ‘Mechs that took center stage in Battletech had wight, they looked and felt like combat machines. Each Battlemech looks purpose built for war, walking weapon platforms that would crush foes under foot given the chance. The stories themselves are not award winning but most are relatable. Each conflict has petty beginning and costly consequences. Few things are black and white, war itself was the enemy but was also celebrated. Each character had their own self serving motivations rather than some altruistic idea, be it seeking honor and glory or avenging their home planet lost to conflict. It wasn’t ultra-bleak like 40K but it was acknowledging there is little black and white in war, just allot of gray. You are piloting a towering killing machine and winning sometimes means just getting back alive after you run out of ammo, your armor has been shredded and the other mechs are hunting you down.

As with any community built around a war game, you do run into occasional jerks you need to block but I found most of my interaction with fellow Battletech fans to be good ones. Some of my most cherish from my childhood was playing the table top with my school yard friends or talking about that stupid cartoon. Made new friends simple sharing Battletech fan art and still enjoy talking about Battlemechs with my current social group when I can.  

Coming full circle; If that stupid, stupid cartoon can teach us anything, don’t be petty. It’s far easier to make enemies than allies and in this world of gray, do the right thing when you can… that and Nicolai Malthus was an ass... sorry Jade Falcon fans but you know why he’s the meme. 

[mr2swap]

Bodyswap Clinic: "Too old for college"

-Too old for college?- Said the college board when I retired without warning, I'm only 65 years old, and I'm not that old. I worked without arriving a single day and that's how the motherfuckers thank me with just a few bucks at the end of the month to live on, I didn't even complain when they invested all the money that was earmarked for the physics department in new uniforms for all teams sports

His much adored athletes could not solve a simple equation if it weren't for me, but it would be hypocritical of me if I complained out loud about something that benefits me I enjoy so much. When the captain of the football team arrived begging on his knees to take the exam with him because if they weren't going to kick him out of the team, I couldn't refuse.

He took me in the car that his parents gave him for his birthday to the nearest body swap clinic, and we made an agreement, only 3 days he would spend 3 days in his body answering all the exams that he was too stupid to pass, and I can say that They were the best 3 days I had had in years. It was great to be young again.

And not only being young but also being popular, muscular and being fucking attractive in all my life I had never stepped foot in a gym but in the body of Jacob Taylor the quarterback of the university football team it was like living again. I even dared to abuse the deal I had with Jacob a bit and went to a gay bar on the other side of town, god! I must have broken like 4 asses that night with the tremendous tool that I had between my legs.

Likewise, I was always gay, but I didn't have the best self-esteem or the best looks, it's not like there was a long line to get fucked by a 70-year-old nerd like me. But in Jacob's muscular and attractive body I felt confident and even somewhat arrogant, -Do you want to touch them?- I told the first guy that he bought me a beer at the bar while flexing Jacob's huge arms just to show off. It felt good to be the center of attention for once in a lifetime.

The next day after taking all of Jacob's exams, it was a piece of cake, I was sure that Jacob would stay on the football team at least until he had to take another exam, the 3 days ended so quickly that I did not realize it, but He was a man of his word, so I gave him back his body and as soon as I got back to my old and tired body I felt like shit, Jacob gave me some money and thanked me and left in the car that I had been driving for 3 days.

I returned to my house and apparently Jacob did not go out for 3 days because he was in a mess, there was a huge bag of half-eaten Cheetos in front of the television, and he even left the sports channel on before leaving my house, I started cleaning my house returning to my routine as if nothing had happened, but the next day Jacob showed up at my house.

And he was not alone, he bro"ught 2 friends who wanted the same treatment as Jacob -please "bro" we need to pass the almost if we don't want to be kicked out of the team- I couldn't help but smile as those 2 athletes knelt in front of me and I gladly accepted they passed the days, the months and when I realized it, my room was full of athletes fighting for whom their beloved teacher would take their body.

"If I don't take this exam, my parents are going to kill me"

"If they expel me from the university, my girlfriend will break up with me"

"My mother told me that if I failed one more time they would take me out of the university and put me to work in the family business"

Were some of the comments heard from testosterone-filled athletes all over my room fighting each other to take a turn for me to answer all the answers that they are too idiots to make themselves.

Suddenly all the athletes from that university had the highest grades in the entire state and all thanks to their old and beloved professor, little by little I began to spend more time in the body of stupid athletes and less in my old and tired body and maybe Someday I would stay in the university forever passing from body to body of dumb athletes to help them in their exams.

Now I'm late, I have a math test in an hour and if I rush to finish it, maybe I'll have time to go to my favorite bar because the body I'm in now has a huge cock.

esp: sucked.https://docs.google.com/document/d/1V8VH1NvA7mC2B12uj8iKyxrI472vT_L_d85zQA_smOM/edit

Normally, I only post one story a week here on Tumblr. But today is a special day, it's my birthday, and I was looking for an excuse to show you my birthday cake. lol

[truefant4sy]

EP 1: "you really know how to make me cry when you give me those ocean eyes" | the first episode of Sweet & Salty

the first episode to my new series 'sweet & salty' Centered around the Hulu show 'The bear.'

warnings: kinda fluff, a smidge of angst, a lot of nostalgia,kissing,almost smut

"shittt okay vee so either we go stupid and get 4lokos or we get some nasty ass bear and just chug that" i looked at my best friend awaiting her answer "um..be stupid and grab them damn 4lokos" vee laughed showing her pink braced teeth "okay I'll go grab some chips and shit. This is finna be our best movie night yet" i clapped my hands together and grabbed about 4 4lokos out of the cold liquor store freezer i look around the store for a minute then walked up to the counter "uh my friend is getting everything else can i just sit those here?" i asked the bored counter clerk he simply nodded and continued looking at the erotic magazine. 'Fucking cunt' i thought before walking over to the candy isle as i looked around i could feel a presence looming over me like the feeling you get when you teacher is standing over you during a test "damn can you mo-" i turned around and stopped my sentence "my bad..Jojo?" i eternally cringed at the high school nickname "hi carmen" i nodded trying to shake the awkwardness off "eh..how are you?" he asked me shifting from on foot on to the other "good. I uh went to New York and got my degree" i told him.

It was always easy to tell him everything "yeah? i went to New York last year" he smiled "yeah? i heard through the grapevine that you got yourself a restaurant" he rubbed at his face and nodded "i do" he said in a monotone voice. i wanted to bring up Mikey but i just decided against it "can i ask you something Jojo?" he looked at me waiting for me to say something "did you really get the uh..tattoo removed..like you said you would?" he asked me.

I said two years ago when i left for New York and said that i was gonna get the tattoo i got of his name removed and i did not do it whatsoever.

"no I didn't actually" I turned to the right and moved my hair to show him the small letter that began at the back of my ear and ended and the bottom of my neck "well that's good..You got something planned tonight?" he asked me before waving his hands "not that like I wanna come over or something like that" I laughed only laughed at him trying to explain it "yeah me and vee are having a sleep over slash movie night I guess since I'm back" I told him trying not to be so awkward "that sounds fun..I'm sorry I didn't call you- or try to" he looked down at the ground "it's fine Carmen I should have cut you off like that" he chuckled "it's fine i mean at least I'm still Carmel to you" he shrugged dramatically "yes you are" i smiled "uh..can I have your number?..to stay in contact of course" he asked before looking away once our eyes locked "yeah can i see your phone" i twisted my necklace 'stop doing that' i dropped my necklace.

he handed me his phone for me to type my number in I called my number to make sure it rung and it did "I'll save your number now" I told him as I pulled out my phone "you still have that photo?" he shook his head and smiled, I looked at my case and saw the collection of high school Polaroids I kept one of us doing nothing but just looking at each other "yeah I don't throw away shit" I said before saving his number "josie did you-" vee stopped in her tracks and sighed "well hi Carmel macchiato" she shook her head and laughed before giving him a quick side hug "hey vee" he said simply "still got your braces I see" he said sarcastically "shut up I'm getting them off next week dude" she rolled her green eyes "I'm just fucking with you" he said patting her shoulder "I know carm" she laughed "well hurry and grabbed some shit josie I wanna go watch that movie" she sighed and walked over to the counter.

"alright" I nodded "you should the nerd's ropes" carmen stated "yeah? okay then" I grabbed the nerd's ropes and looked at them they did seem good "and um get chocolate too because too much fruit flavored candy makes you-" I interrupted him "throw up? I know carmen" I laughed and grabbed some twixs and snickers "alright well I'll call you tonight if that's okay?" he asked me running a hand thru his wild curly hair "yeah of course" he nodded and walked to the back of the store to grab a drink "bye Jojo" he looked at him from over his should "bye carm"

My fucking stomach hurts and I now remember every reason why I don't fucking drink 4lokos anymore because my god.

Vee was in the bathroom throwing up everything she ate and drunk today, and I sat there trying not fucking cry from how much my stomach was killing me "Vierra? Vee?" I called to her trying to see if she was okay thru my own pain "yes" she said weakly "I stood up and walked over to the bathroom to see her resting her blonde head on the side on my tub "I have clothes just shower and ill uh..door dash or something" I said still clenching at my stomach "no..I don't want door dash" she replied drunkly "I want you to get your boyfriend carmen over here so he can cook" she burped "carmen isn't and wasn't my boyfriend Vierra" I shook my head at what she had said.

He was my best friend "Fuck you. Just get that man over here because I'm fucking hungry Josephine" I nodded and walked over to my dresser to grab her some clothes "okay ill call him just please shower" I helped her get up and get undressed before I ran her a bath making sure to some of those calming bath salts that I bought last week.

After I got her into the bath I stepped out at plopped down on my bed before grabbing the painkillers in my night stand and popping two of them into my mouth and chasing it with a water 'call carmen' I groaned and listened to my head before picking up my phone at first my thumb just hovered over his name in my phone "fuck it" I pressed the button and waited for him to pick him which wasn't a long wait "Josephine?" his voice was deep and soft "I'm sorry were you uh sleeping?" I asked him knowing the answer considering that it was 12:52 "kinda. Whatcha need?" he asked me and I kind of hesitated "um could you come over and make something to eat for me and vee, she specifically asked for to cook" I told him my leg bouncing with anxiety "yeah. I can" he said groaning "okay. I'll send you, my address."

It wasn't long before he was knocking at the door of my apartment I got up from the bed and opened the door "hi josie" he looked so tired 'and so fine' I shook my head at stepped aside to let him in "I'm sorry to wa-" I tried to apologize but he interrupted me "it's fine. I rather it be you anyways" he groaned and ran his hand thru his hair again "what does she want to eat?" he asked me while he looked around my kitchen pulling out pots and pans "chicken alfredo" I leaned against the island in my kitchen he nodded "josie? is your boyfriend here?" a drunk Vierra called out of my bedroom "vee yes he's here and he's not boyfriend" I sighed and carmen only scratched his head I took a seat in the barstool at my island and just watched him.

"you just gonna stare or are you gonna tell me about New York?" he was going back in forth from my fridge to the stove to the cabinet cooking away "well if you don't mind I'm gonna do both" I giggled 'like a damn school girl' I shook my head "well uh in New York I ate a shit ton of food and the people aren't that bad" I scratched my head "yeah? what all did you eat?" he asked me as he added a stick of butter to a pan "everything. Like I basically ate at every fucking restaurant I could find" I laughed "still got a huge ass appetite I see" he shook he head and turned around to give me a quick smile 'that was cute' "yes that was" "hm?" he looked at me "I said yes I do. I'm a hungry whore..like the game hungry hippo but sluttier" he shook his head and put his hands on his hips "gotta be nicer to yourself" I rolled my eyes at his words "Josephine."

I threw my hands up " okay I'm gonna be nicer to myself carmen" I stuck my tongue out at him "now. Where's your pasta?" he asked me still stirring and picking stuff in a skillet "in the last cabinet to the left he opened the cabinet and looked at me "only 3 packs josie? I should be ashamed" when he said that I remembered Michael saying the same thing 2 years back before I left for New York "uh carmen...I'm really sorry about Mikey" I sighed "it's fine."

he said quickly and bluntly "is the food done yet?" Vierra shouted from my room "no vee not yet" carmen shouted back "can you pull out some plates Jojo?" he asked me still focused on the stove and making sure the pasta didn't over boil "..yes chef" I stood up from the stool and made my way over to the dishwasher were I pulled out a few heart shaped plates "that's cute" he said looking at the plates "I know right?" I replied back "oh uh..could I see your room...? because I uh remembered how narly your bedroom was when we were kids so I just thought it would y'know still be uh..cool" he ran his hand through his hair "yeah. It's still narly probably even more narly because I got my own money to puy any decoration I want" he laughed "yeah your apartment is cute" stirred the pot again as he complimented me "aw your sweet carmy that's why I call you Carmel" he laughed.

Finally the food was done and Vierra ate that shit down "this is why we love carmen right josie?" she wiped her mouth after eating her 3 plate "mhm" I only nodded my head to what she said "bye" vee got up from her seat at my island and went back into my room "well at least she's happy" carmen joked as I stood up to put the dishes in the sink "do you uh..want me to go or?" he asked me at he rested his chin the palm of his hand "no. I mean you should stay" he nodded.

We sat in silence for a bit, "you know what? last week when I had gone to that same liquor store guess who I saw" carmen looked at me "uh who?" I asked "Claire" I rolled my eyes at his answer "you know I don't her." I rolled my eyes again "can I ask why?" he tilted his head in a boyish manner "yes because she was a fucking bully, so I punched in her stupid fucking face. Shes still one of those manic pixie dream girls" he nodded "that was funny" he laughed.

"wanna go sit on the couch?" I asked him as I stood up stretching my body 'those stools hurt.' carmen nodded and walked behind her they both plopped down on the couch and just sat there again in silence to take in each other's presence "legs?" carmen looked at me "legs." I nodded and put my legs in his lap like how we did when we were just high school students, we always said it like that "I really fucking missed you carmy" she admitted to him he only nodded his head in agreement "why did we even stop talking?" carmen asked his eyes staring holes through me "you blew up at me the week before I was supposed to leave for New York..so I just thought that the end" I admitted to him 'why the fuck am I telling him everything' "I didn't mean to. I was just-" he gave up on his sentenced and just sighed "it's fine. We're over that now, right?" I asked him softly putting a comforting hand on his should "right." he nodded.

"My mom asked about you." I told him as I traced little shapes onto his skin "she did? what did she say?" he asked his head back on the couch, his eyes closed in a relaxed manner "Just the usual like 'what happened to carmen?' and 'where's carmen?' " I told him giggling at my mom's nosiness he laughed, as he laughed, I just stared at him.

I kind of forgot how..pretty he was in a weird way, like he was pretty but in a manly sense and handsome in a chaotic way his hair crazy his eyes stared holes through my soul when he would look at me his random tattoos the littered his skin his chaotic-ness never failed to calm me at the worst moments even when he made me cry I could never blame him.

"weird question." i said he opened one eye and looked at me "yeah?" he waited for me to ask "can i uh..kiss you? sorry if thats weird" i blurted out quietly making sure I didn't wake up vierra "no its not weird. And uh yeah" his head lifted from the couch as my hand held his cheek his eyes closed for a second as if he was embracing the feeling of my skin on his all over again I leaned in our foreheads just touching the tips of our noses brushing against each other with each breath, his nose and skin were always cold 'just kiss' I listened to the small voice in my head and kissed him and the feeling was intensified by a thousand.

I never knew it was possible to miss a person this much as I missed how his lips felt on mine. When we were in high school we only ever kissed once as a joke but this time was, weirdly real and love filled I guess I just knew I did want it to end My hands ran through his hair "fuck" he murmured softly into my mouth this wasn't how I planned to spend my first week back in Chicago at all but his chaotic-ness always went with my straight forward plans which was why we were such good friends in high school but instead I was the chaotic one and he was the straight forward planned one 'the roles always switch with him'.

His tongue wrapped my very own making my body quiver his hands held my back as he softly pushed me down onto my light pink sofa he didn't break the kiss as he got onto the sofa more his arms now on both sides of my head, he softly grabbed my legs and put them on his waist as a sign for me to wrap them around his waist he softly pulled away "is this okay?" he asked me his forehead still against mine I nodded he kissed me a few more times before going to my neck kissing and biting at the brown flesh making me cover my mouth so I could keep quiet 'you went 2 years without sex by the way' the same small voice reminded me in my head, he lifted my shirt up and began to kiss my stomach making my eyes flutter "god save me." I muttered under my breath as he looked up at me as if he wanted approval.

My hands grabbed at his hair his kisses got slower and lower then by bedroom door sung open "have you guys-" Vierra stopped in the door way making carmen sit up and pull my shirt down "oh uh fuck my bad" Vierra awkwardly turned around and went back into my room "well fuck." carmen groaned and rubbed his face "I should get going" he stood up and grabbed his phone and keys "alright" I stood up with him and opened the door, before he walked out he kind of just stopped "I missed you too" he said in a quiet voice "I know you did." I said sarcastically making him roll his eyes before he walked out of the door, he hugged me. Giving me the biggest bear hug ever and he smelled great "see you later Josephine" he let go of me "see you later carmy and text me when you get home okay?" he smiled and nodded and before I knew it, he was in the elevator on his was down to the lobby. I closed my door and locked it.

And there he was again, already back in my life changing the course of everything once again.