#it’s just… I put too much of myself into this

[eddiemunsonswhxre]

on camera / jj maybank

rated: m (18+, minors dni)

masterlist

wc: 4.2k

cw: onlyfans!jj, voyeurism, daddy kink, fingering, unprotected piv (don't do this!!), cursing, some degradation (whore, slut)

you complain to jj about being broke. after being offended at his onlyfans suggestion, you learn something new about your best friend. offering to show you what he means turns into something neither of you were anticipating.

(i'm going to make this a series, leave comments/send requests for what else jj and reader could film together *winky face*)

-

  “i’m not making an only fans,” you scoff, walking away from jj and towards the chateau.

  jj rolls his eyes before chasing after you. “why not? you need money, it’s so easy, and you have a hot body. it’s a no brainer, y/n,” he tries saying.

  “i don’t really want my naked body on the internet,” you say.

  jj grabs the door you try hard to slam in his face to get away. “okay, that’s a valid concern, but just blur your face,” he continues.

  you groan, turning to face him since you won’t be getting away. “even if i wanted to, the thought of recording myself and just ugh it’s terrifying,” you explain.

  “it isn’t that bad, y/n, i swear,” jj says, looking at you seriously.

  you shake your head, eyes closed. “like you would know, jj,” you mutter. 

  jj purses his lips, debating the risk of just saying it all. “you don’t really think i make all that money just working at the country club, do you?” he asks in a lower voice. your face changes to shock, jj does what?

  “wait… you have a…” you begin, not knowing fully how to process.

  jj nods slowly. “yeah, and it’s not like i make enough to live off of, but combined with my job… it helps. and you’re saying your job isn’t enough and i’m telling you something like this could help you get more of the money you need,” he says.

  “i need a minute,” you mutter, walking to the couch. you bring your hand to your mouth, biting your nails as images flash in your mind. how did it work? what did he do? did he set up a camera? did he take photos? did he video himself cumming? did he make videos with other girls? 

  jj chuckles awkwardly, seeing the gears in your head turning. he walks over, sitting on the coffee table in front of you. “most of the time, it’s like pictures i just take on my phone in the mirror or something. or i’ll take short videos just… well, you know like on snapchat or something type ones. and occasionally i’ll go through the effort of setting my phone up, bought a stupid tripod and everything, and i get more money when i talk in them or really just make noises in general. my face is either never in them or always blurred, it gets easier as you go,” he explains.

  you shake your head again, covering your eyes. “j, i don’t wanna think about you like that,” you whine in complaint. jj laughs, putting his hand on your shoulder.

  “sorry, sweetheart,” he says with a small smile. “just trying to give you an idea of how easy it could be, only if you want,” he explains before taking his hand away.

  “well, i just don’t think i could. i honestly find it hard to believe you can,” you chuckle, picking at a string on the couch. 

  jj puts his hand to his chest in mock offense. “what do you mean? i happen to be quite the sex symbol thank you very much,” he says. you both laugh, shaking your head at his theatrics.

  now how did you get in this position? you weren’t sure. jj’s always been known for being convincing and a little too inappropriate, especially when it comes to you. you just weren’t sure how he managed to convince you into this.

  “you sure?” jj asks, grabbing the remote for his led lights and turning it to red. you blink in surprise at the lights and then he turns the overhead light off.

  you look at him, seeing him already looking at you expectantly. “did you buy led lights just for this?” you ask, and jj nods sheepishly. “i knew it was out of character for you,” you mutter, looking around more at his room to see that it’s more cleaned up than usual.

jj takes a moment to process your words. he didn’t know you realized that much about him. “that’s not an answer to my question,” he points out. 

you take a breath, analyzing the scene in front of you. for the first time in your life, jj’s bed was made. the room was casted in the warm light of a single lamp and the red leds. his phone was set up on a small tripod on top of his dresser facing his empty bed. “you have a door, if i can’t do it… i’ll leave,” you say. 

jj nods and walks over to his phone. “i do talk… during them, it uh, they like it more that way. so it’s kind of like i’m acting out a scene with no one else there. really makin’ use of the imagination,” he explains. you nod, wrapping your arms around yourself and standing next to the dresser and out of frame of his camera. he gives you a sheepish smile before pressing record. 

it’s not like you had much time to prepare for this. i mean… how do you really prepare to watch your best friend make porn? if jj was uncomfortable, he wasn’t showing it. 

he moved in front of the phone camera, giving you one last glance before peeling his shirt over his head. “i’ve been waiting on this all day, baby,” he mutters, causing your eyes to bulge out of your head. why did he sound so much sexier all of a sudden?

he rubs his hands down his torso slowly, sensually until he reaches the waistband of his shorts. “you want me to take them off? you wanna come help me get my dick hard?” he asks in a teasing voice. 

maybe you weren’t ready for this. but part of you wanted to stay, needed to stay even. he tsked, pushing down the basketball shorts he’d been wearing for the day. you bit your lip, watching him sit down on the edge of his bed. “come touch me, baby,” he says, leaning back and sliding his hand down to run over his half hard length. he lets out a small groan. “just like that, mm,” he says, closing his eyes. your stomach dips in arousal. jj had always been hot, but he’d also always been your best friend. but right now, you wanted nothing more than to be the girl he was fantasizing about for his video. 

your eyes are trained on the growing tent in his boxers, seeing his dick grow with each pass of his hand. everytime you thought he was at his fullest, he kept growing. you rock from foot to foot to give yourself something else to maybe focus on, but it wasn’t working. “you feel how hard you get daddy?” he asks the camera and you’re at a loss of air. you never thought hearing jj referring to himself as daddy would get you so hot. you knew your face was on fire, and you felt all too hot with way too many clothes. jj glanced at you, gulping when he saw your flustered expression. 

“time to get out of these,” he muttered, eyes more on you than the camera, as if to warn you. he lifted up his hips while leaning back on one arm and then used the other to push down his waist band. his cock bounced free and you felt your panties dampen. he pushed them completely off quickly and then his hand was wrapped around the base of his thick, long, cock. he looked… ethereal. bathed in a mixture of warm light and red, making his skin look perfect. he let out a low moan as he tugged upwards. “fuck, always making me feel so good,” he grunts, jerking himself slowly. he dares to look at you once more, dick twitching at the sight of your obvious nerves and subtle movement of your thighs rubbing together. 

he continued to jerk himself, imagining you getting on your knees in front of him. “i want you to choke on this cock baby, get it all nice and wet for me so i can fuck you so good,” he groans. you’re unable to hold back the small whimper and jj’s eyes shoot to you as you put your hand over your mouth. 

jj knows he has the opportunity, and he would hate himself if he didn’t try. “why don’t you just come over here, y/n?” he asks, sitting up straighter. 

you blink hard, glancing from him to the phone in complete shock. “i-, you-” you scramble, pointing to the phone. 

he understands your concern. “i’ll bleep out your name, our faces will be blurred, i won’t even post it if you don’t want to. just try, with me, please?” he proposed. a million thoughts ran through your mind, hundreds of concerns, lots of questions, but above all: desire. 

“o-okay,” you whisper. jj smiles at your response and motions you over to him. he scoots to the side of his bed, looking at his phone screen to make sure he’s still in view. 

you walk slowly to the side of his bed. “take these clothes off for me, pretty girl,” he hums, grabbing you by your waist and running his hands up and down your sides. “i’ll cut this part out, but if you want to slow down or stop just let me know okay? this is all in your ballpark now, y/n,” he says, massaging your hips with his thumbs. 

you look to the phone, seeing the image being recorded and take a deep breath. “okay, but i-i’m going to need to just follow your lead, i-i’m nervous,” you admit.

“nervous because of the phone or because of me?” he asks. 

you shrug, looking away from him. “both,” you answer truthfully. 

jj nods understandingly. “um, would you rather not do it, because it’s me? i’m going to be so honest when i say, i’ve thought about you, like this, a lot. but i get it, we’re friends and if you’re scared of this hurting that i get it. but personally, i don’t think anything could ruin our relationship,” he says. 

“j, i want to, i just… need your direction,” you explain. 

jj smiles at your response, it soon turning to a smirk. “good thing i like being in charge,” he mutters, snapping your waist band. you giggle shyly before guiding jj’s hands to undo the button of your shorts. “oh, needy girl needs me to do it all for her. i see,” he says, yanking you towards him so he can pull them down. jj looks at the pair of underwear you have on and his face starts to get a bit redder. 

“look at these,” he hums, running his hands along the band at your hips. they were a nice dark green lace with a little bow that was way too innocent for how they looked. “show them your pretty panties, baby,” he says, using his grip to turn you to face the camera. you move your hips jokingly side to side, trying to make yourself less nervous. “there you go, look at this little bow,” he chuckles, flicking it with his finger. “let’s show em the back,” he says after a minute of you standing there and him running his hands along them. he lets out a grunt as the cheeky bottoms show off your ass.

jj always thought you had a really nice ass, but right now? he was obsessed. “what?” you muttered, noticing his silence.

he just looks up to you shaking his head. “can’t believe you’ve been hiding this ass from me,” he says, reaching around you and gripping a cheek harshly for the camera to see before slapping it. you yelp in surprise causing jj to smile smugly.

  jj reaches for the edge of your t-shirt, pulling you back to face him before pushing it up. you follow his hint, taking it in your hands and pulling it off to drop it on the floor. “oh fuck, look at those,” jj says, grabbing your waist and pulling you as close to him as he can. he wastes no time burying his face in between your breasts and kissing up your sternum. 

“j,” you mutter in ecstasy, arousal flooding your panties as you start to really think about the situation you’re in. 

you put your hands into his hair, running the strands between your fingers. “don’t say my name, baby,” he mutters against your skin. his tongue softly caresses the swell of your breast before he begins sucking. 

you pout, but realize you probably shouldn’t be using names if this was going to be posted to jj’s only fans. “what am i supposed to call you then?” you ask, letting your head fall back as you took in the feeling of him sucking on your tits.

jj chuckled and then pulled away from your skin. “daddy,” he says, squeezing your ass in tandem to get you to look at him. you look at him in shock, not expecting him to be so forward. “or, if that’s too much, just stick with babe and stuff, ok?” he continues before checking to make sure you were good. you nod in response and he smiles, looking to the camera before beginning to adjust you. jj pulls you onto his lap, making you straddle his thigh. 

he presses his lips to your neck passionately and you let out a moan of surprise. you held his neck with one hand, the other fisting the hair at the nape of his neck. jj held your hip with one hand and used the other on the back of your shoulder blades to push you into him. “need to work you up a bit, don’t want this done too fast,” he mumbles into your skin. 

after a moment of just that, both his hands fall to your hips and he uses his grip to grind you against his bare thigh before pulling away. “fuck, baby, i can feel how wet you are through your panties,” he groans, eyes closing at the feeling of your arousal seep through the thin fabric and leave a trail on his thigh. you whine, burying your face in his neck and beginning to suck a hickey above his collarbone. “what a good girl, getting all messy for me with so little attention. you just want to be my good little girl, don’t ya,” jj grunts, his mind struggling to process that he was talking to you and not a screen. 

jj pushes you off him carefully, laying you down on the bed so your pussy was facing the camera. he sits to your side, grabbing the sides of your panties and looking to you for approval. you nod and he wastes no time peeling them off your body, mouth watering at the sight of a string of arousal connecting your soaked panties to your core. he throws your underwear to the side and then yanks your knees open so the camera could see you all spread out. jj pulls your leg over his lap as he slightly turns. “can i touch your pretty pussy, baby?” he asks, rubbing the innermost part of your thigh just centimeters from your throbbing cunt, all while looking you in the eyes. 

“please,” you whimper, trying to thrust your hips down towards his hand. 

jj smirks, using his middle finger and dipping it into the pool of your arousal near your entrance. his fingers slowly glide upwards, the anticipation making you bite on your lower lip. he reaches your clit, using his singular finger to make slow, slippery circles around your clit. you look to his face, seeing just how focused in he is on his movements. “so wet for me, i think i might have to make this pretty pink little pussy mine,” he says in a husky voice while using his finger to pull your clit upwards, stretching your lips and making you whimper.

“daddy, please,” you say, wriggling your hips. jj looks up to you in slight shock, not expecting you to fall so comfortably so fast. 

jj tsks, adding another finger to swipe across your clit a couple times before lowering down. he checks his phone to make sure you’re both still in frame and then dips his middle and ring finger into you. you moan lowly, letting your eyes flutter shut at the feeling of finally having something inside of you. jj closes his eyes to hold himself together as he starts slowly moving his fingers in and out of you. “you look like such a whore for me, baby,” he says, watching you through his phone screen, mesmerized by the way his fingers easily disappeared into you. he knew his head would be spinning the second his dick was inside of you. “dreamt of this cunt, holy shit,” jj groans, speeding up his pace as you grip onto his arm. you whimper beneath his hand, needing more friction on your clit. 

you squeeze your legs together, the sensation making you choke in pleasure as you scratch jj’s arm. “more,” you moan, back arching as your closed legs make jj’s palm make contact with your clit. 

“more?” jj chuckles, taking his hand away from your pussy and watching mesmerized as you whine for his touch. “does my little slut want my dick? already?” he teases, shoving your knees apart once more. you nod eagerly at him, pussy clenching around nothing. jj motions for you to sit up and you do. he helps maneuver you so you’re now facing sideways, but a little diagonal with your bottom angled slightly towards the camera. 

jj moves to his knees, kneeling in front of you now. “you good with this still?” he asks, faltering back to his semi worried state, checking on you. 

you hold your hands out towards him causing him to lean towards you. you grab the sides of his neck forcing him to stare directly into your eyes. “i really, really need you to fuck me,” you say, thumb tracing his jaw. jj lets out a breath through his nose, nostrils flaring as he tries to hold himself back. he was doing this for you as a friend. he said that this wasn’t going to change your friendship and he wanted to stick as closely to that as possible. he had an overwhelming urge to kiss you, but you didn’t ask for anything romantic between the two of you, this was business. kissing you would mess it up, it would make it too personal. 

he pulls back gently, grabbing your hips and pulling them to him. to avoid having his urge to kiss you worsen, he opts to keep his face further from yours. “i’ll pull out,” he mutters lowly, not wanting to stop to search for a condom he wasn’t even sure he had. you just nod feverishly, not even caring if he decided to cum inside you anyway. “gonna fuck this pretty pussy so good,” he groans, using his hand to guide himself to your entrance. 

he slips just the head of his cock inside, feeling you clench around him as a small moan leaves your lips. “daddy, please, want it hard,” you whine. jj swears his eyes could roll back into his head after hearing you say those words.

before you can register his movements, you’re moaning and throwing your head back as pleasure begins blooming in your gut. jj grabs the backs of your knees, moving your legs up to rest on his chest. he holds onto your lower calves as he rams his dick fully inside of you with no warning. you’re gripping the bed sheets as he grunts and pulls his hips back. “bout to fuck you so hard you’ll go fucking stupid,” he says, punctuating with a sharp forward thrust would sends him into a steady rhythm. the sound of his balls slapping against your ass fill his room, his phone picking up each whimper and grunt that escapes the two of you. you look over to the camera, pussy clenching as it fully hits you. 

jj was recording himself fuck you. he was filming, and he was fucking you. and he was going to post it. not only would a bunch of strangers get to see this, but jj would have it. he could watch it over, and over, and over again. you look at the image reflected on the screen. jj had your legs held tightly to his chest, your breasts were bouncing with each impact he made and you could see his balls slapping against you. your fingers were gripping the sheets and jj’s thighs were beginning to shake. he was holding himself back. he was going to cum because of you on camera. shit, he was going to make you cum on camera and then post it for his followers to see so he could make money off it. you had never felt so turned on.

not wanting to make jj suffer, you reach your hand furthest from the camera to your clit. “that’s it, babygirl, fuckkk yeah rub that pretty clit for daddy,” jj groans, watching your fingers move swiftly over your slick, sensitive clit. you curse, clenching around him as your fingers begin to send you to your edge. you’d never cum so fast, but the idea of being on camera and doing it with jj was something much more arousing than what you’d previously experienced. 

the feeling in your lower stomach was causing you to see stars as it grew tighter and tighter. you sped up the movement of your fingers as jj’s cock stretched you perfectly. “i-i think i’m gonna c-cum already,” you whine, eyes fluttering shut. 

jj picks up his pace, using all of his concentration on not busting inside of you. “cum for me, my fucking whore, fucking cum,” he grunts, his own vision beginning to blur. a loud, gasping moan is heard from you as you tighten around him almost painfully hard and your back arches high off the bed. you body jolts as your fingers continue their speed on your clit. jj drops your legs, pulling out of you quickly to rut between the juncture of your hip and lip of your pussy. you feel his cock nudging the edge of your hand as you send yourself through your orgasm and immediately grab his cock, moving him over to hump against your wet slit, the head of his cock rubbing against your clit as you covered him with your hand. jj grunts, hips stuttering as ropes of his cum splatter against your clit and up past your belly button. his hips grind harder into you as his jaw is dropped in a moan, reveling in riding out his orgasm with the feeling of spreading his cum across your pussy lips. 

both of you pant as you come down from your highs. once jj has enough of a hold on himself again, he pushes himself up and moves your hips to once again face the camera. he shows the camera your pussy, coated in his white cum as you intermediately clench around nothing while you finish coming down. jj moves to get up, stopping the recording and grabbing a t shirt from the floor. he wordlessly wipes you off, being extra careful to lightly go over your sensitive pussy. he wipes himself off as well and then throws the shirt back down and sits next to where your head was resting, eyes closed against the bed. 

“doing okay, y/n?” jj asks, looking at you unsure. you hum lowly, nodding. you blindly reach out next to you, your hand patting against the bed and jj’s thigh until he takes the hint and grabs ahold of your hand. “you sure?” he asks, rubbing the top of your knuckles with his thumb. 

you slowly blink your eyes open before looking at him. “i am doing… so much more than okay,” you say with a smile on your face. you both laugh and jj smiles at you with adoration. “so, when are you um, posting it?” you ask.

jj looks at you for a moment, smiling fading into a more serious face. “you know i don’t have to post it right?” he reminds you.

“uh yes you do, do i get a cut of what you make off it?” you say, also serious but putting a joking tone underneath. 

his finger stops stroking your knuckles. “you’re for real?” he asks and you’re quickly nodding. “well, um, it shouldn’t take me more than tonight to edit it,” he shrugs.

you smile up at him before pushing yourself up to your elbows. “so send me the link when you post it?” you ask, tone flirtier than before. jj smirks at you, liking this attitude on you. 

“you’ll have access to everything i’ve posted…” he trails off.

you raise your brows. “is that a problem?” you question. 

jj shakes his head, smirk growing. “just don’t hurt your arm fingering yourself to me,” he shrugs. you roll your eyes and smack him in the arm to which he just laughs.

“funny, now can you help me up please?” jj immediately moves to help you stand, talking to distract you from the fact that his dick was twitching again at the thought of you getting yourself off to him. 

[akxmee]

𝐖𝐇𝐘 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐊𝐄 𝐔𝐏 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌//𝘑𝘑𝘒 𝘉𝘖𝘠𝘚

Your relationship was perfect, so why?

Satoru gojo, Toji Fushiguro, Nanami Kento.

𝘚𝘈𝘛𝘖𝘙𝘜 𝘎𝘖𝘑𝘖

: 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐎𝐏 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐘.

If someone asked Satoru who his first priority was, you would be his answer.

Because that's what sounds right, isn't it? But no, deep inside you were anything but that. Satoru never considered you his top priority even though you were his girlfriend, the world was above you. Don't get him wrong; it's not like he didn't love you, it was just that his responsability as the strongest came first.

And you knew it.

You knew he would never choose you over his work, as much as he claimed that he was bored of it or how many times he slacked out of it. It was something he was chained to and he wasn't even aware of it, but you were.

So naturally, this was the main factor you two didn't really work. That's the reason you were driving your car right now, clutching on the steering wheel while being on your phone with Satoru.

—So you're literally telling me to go back right now?

—Yeah, sorry babe. I'll make it u-

—Don't you dare say you'll make it up to me, Satoru. It's our fucking anniversary, and you're going to miss it again?

Silence filled the air, you didn't hear a reply coming from your phone. You knew you hit a nerve there, because he did miss your anniversary last year too for the same fucking reason: some stupid, dammed mission that wasn't even that important. You heard a sigh, and he talked again in a softer voice.

—Y/N, you know this is my duty as the strongest..

—This is also your duty as a boyfriend, or did you forget?

—Please babe, you know the world needs me right now the most.

—I need you too, Toru.

It came out of you in a tone needier than I should be, you were desperate at this point. You had planned everything so nice for your three years anniversary; your cute elegant outfit that matched the blue of his eyes in such a sotisficate way, the place where you two would have dinner since you wanted to make it perfect..hell, you even planned to be the one picking him up since it was all a surprise! All he had to do is put a damn suit and spend the day with you, and he wasn't able to do that because of some guard thing. He has his right to be busy, yeah, but isn't he always? You would even understand if it was something urgent like a major threat curse, but it was some casual guard around Shibuya.

—I know you do, honey. I understand, but..

—But the world is more important, isn't it?

He kept silence, and then you knew again.

It has always been, so where's the surprise? You should've known better.

—I'm so, so sorry. I'll try to make time for next week, maybe?

—We make three years tonight, not next week.

—I know, i'm sorry.

—You're always sorry, Satoru! But you never show it. You were sorry last year too, and you're just going to do It again!

At this point your whole makeup was ruined by tears, but you still kept your cool as far as you could. You even managed to park your car at some parking lot you found on your way since driving while being distracted was pretty dangerous, and your blurry vision could mess you up while being on the road.

He sighed once again.

—Y/N, let's just talk it out. I'm sure we can agree on som-

—No, Satoru. I won't humiliate myself once again trying to make it work out all by myself. This is it; me or that mission of yours. You choose me, i let it pass and pick you up from whenever you go to get to our anniversary date.

You take a deep breath before continuing.

—You choose the mission, you don't call me again expecting another date. You don't even dare to call me again because i will block you, we're just done.

An uncomfortable silence appears, you can feel the tension even if it's just by the phone.

On the other line, Satoru bites his lip thinking what he should even do. He thinks and thinks, considering wether he should choose. The world was his responsability, but so was his relationship with you too. He knew how much you suffered everytime he left for a long period of time, and he didn't wish for you to suffer because of him and his work again. However his duty was also important, being the strongest and all. This job had him tied up and he couldn't leave it for you even if he desired so.

But as hard as this decision was, he had to make it.

So he finally chose.

—Okay, princess. I'm at shibuya's station, come and pick me up please?

He smiled sweetly at his phone.

Yeah, he did the right thing. You were worth the sacrifice and he knew you would be happy to hear it.

So, why weren't you replying?

Fuck.

BEEP, BEEP, BEEP..

He tried to call you again, and again, and again.

You had blocked him by then.

𝘛𝘖𝘑𝘐 𝘍𝘜𝘚𝘏𝘐𝘎𝘜𝘙𝘖:

𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐆𝐎𝐓 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃 𝐖𝐈𝐅𝐄.

It all started by small mistakes, like this morning when you approached him while he was cooking. You hugged him from behind as he cooked breakfast for you and your little Megumi, who you loved as if he was your biological son.

—Hey hon. What are you making?

He looked at you over his shoulder, leaning in a bit and kissing your temple as a greeting before replying.

—Your favorite, scrambled eggs.

You paused for a second, wondering if you heard right.

—Sorry, what?

He looked at you weird as if he didn't understand where your confusion came from before repeating.

—Scrambled eggs.

—That's not mom's favorite, dad! I know it, she prefers them fried.

You hear Megumi from the kitchen table, and he inmediately smiles at you when he feels you look at him as he was proud of his answer. You nod your head at the kid.

—That's right sweetie. Mom's glad you remembered, unlike someone I know...

You joked, emphasizing the "someone" in your sentence. Megumi laughed and so did you.

However, he didn't laugh.

Instead, he simply put the scrambled eggs in his plate and put a new egg on the frying pan.

—Well, then fried eggs it is.

You thought nothing of it back then, until later on you found out a photo of toji and his ex wife having breakfast on a restaurant while you were looking for a shirt to borrow in his drawer. You looked at it closely, so close that you even looked at what they were having out of pure curiosity. Want to know what was in her plate? Scrambled eggs.

Now, the confusion had more sense.

It wasn't a mistake, he just did it again.

Once again, he reflected his wife in you.

This has happened more than once, him pretending you were his late wife just because he missed her. At first you didn't mind, he was getting used to the married life and having another wife after losing his last one was hard enough for you to understand it and let it pass.

However, as time passed by it became more frequent.

From him simply calling you nicknames like "Love" instead of "doll" or mistaking your clothes size with hers to things like confusing your hobbies, favorite movies and memories with hers. He recalled moments you didn't even spend with him that you later on figured that were with his ex wife, and Megumi was the one that usually had to correct him when he did so.

It was tiring, and it was driving you insane.

It made you insecure knowing that every time he saw you, his mind reflected the image of his deceased wife in his eyes. How many times have you thought about her while he held your hand, while he kissed you or while he held you? To him, were you Y/N or were you someone who really resembled her? He liked you because you were you, or because she was like you too? You didn't know, and you didn't want to.

So after thinking about it for what felt like an eternity and watching it happen again and again, you decided to leave. It wasn't healthy for you anymore, this lifestyle was only hurting you all over.

This had to end.

—You're going to leave dad, aren't you?

No way.

You looked behind you, finding Megumi at your door at the verge of tears. He started sobbing silently when he didn't hear a reply from you, rushing to hug your leg.

—Mom, please, d-don't go. I'll talk to daddy, I promise! We will make fried eggs tomorrow too. He will remember this time..

It sincerely broke your heart how tightly he clung to your leg. His hands were trembling and you felt the need to comfort him, so you grabbed him by his shoulders and crouched down.

Then, you spoke softly.

—It's okay, Megs. Mommy is not leaving, I'm just packing my things because i have to go on a business trip in a few days. You understand, right?

He looked at you as he sobbed, and you wiped his tears with your sleeve.

—So you won't leave me and dad?

—Yes, I won't. Mommy has a little something to do, but we can have fried eggs tomorrow.

He looked calmer, but he still looked at you worried. You could tell he was still scared.

—Mom..

He pulled on your tear stained sleeve.

—Yes, sweetie?

—Could you...—He looked down, shy to ask.— ..read me a book tonight?

You looked at him in awe, it has been so long since you read him a book since he claimed that he was a big boy now and didn't need it anymore. Yet, he was asking for you to do it again.

You looked at your bags and sighed.

—Yeah, why not.

And you did, you accompanied him to his room and tucked him in before grabbing a random book from the shelf to read. He struggled to stay awake throughout the story and managed to do so despite how sleepy he was, You could tell how he was still a little unsure that you weren't going to leave. So before you put the book back and kissed the boy goodnight, he asked if you could sleep with him that night. You hesitated but said yes, and he made space for you to fit in his bed while you two hugged eachother to sleep. He was calmer and happy now that you were laying with him since that meant you wouldn't leave, at least not for tonight if he stayed awake. That was his plan: staying awake the whole night to check if you were planning to leave or not. You wouldn't like it if he catched you, but he figured it was for the best. He smiled and snuggled with you, he won't let you go.

But his plan failed, he fell asleep.

And when he woke up, you where nowhere to be found.

𝘕𝘈𝘕𝘈𝘔𝘐 𝘒𝘌𝘕𝘛𝘖:

𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔, 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐃 𝐇𝐈𝐌.

Nanami loved you to the core, he was so sure of it.

You were the one he wanted to marry, you were the one he wanted to have kids with and he wanted to be the one you call "husband". As simple as that, he just wanted to have a future with you in it. He wouldn't have dated you if he wasn't sure of it, he was a determined man after all.

It took you so long to make him fall in love with you, but you managed to do so. You dug into his heart and reached places in him that he didn't even know he had in such a small place. You took over his heart and became the main focus of his mind, occupying all his thoughts throughout the day until he managed to see you when he came back home. You did little things for him every day that made him fall more in love with you every day, and he loved that.

Until you stopped.

It wasn't immediate, but little by little you began to distance yourself from him and stop trying to make him fall in love with you even more as you always used to do. The funny compliments without any context stopped being present in every conversation, your handmade gifts for when you got home such as cards or matching bracelets stopped appearing and time together It began to decrease more and more.

And he noticed that.

And he missed it, missed them so much. He did because he loved you so much, and he felt like he was losing you. He thought that maybe you were going through a bad time, that maybe you were angry with him, but every time he asked you you always answered him in such a sweet and kind tone that he knew immediately it wasn't something he did. Because he knew you, and he knew that the reason was something deeper than that.

He loved you so much that even when he looked at you right now, crying in front on him, he could only think about one thing: you're beautiful.

—How did you know, Kento?

He smiled at you, holding your hand and wiping your tears away. Nanami simply shrugged.

—I just felt that tension between the two of us. We weren't in love, not anymore.

—Yeah, i felt it too. I was just...worried of hurting you, because I had this feeling that you still loved me.

His expression remained as it was before despite what he was feeling right now. If only you knew how wrong you were to think that it wasn't true, that he didn't love you. He did love you, he loves you so much he wants to keep you all by himself and force you to love him again. He loves you so much he wants to cry hearing you confess to him that you fell out of love even if he already knew it.

He loves you so much he's letting you go.

—..but I'm glad you're the one who proposed the breakup. Otherwise, we would be still stuck in a no feelings relationship.

He finished wiping your tears and slowly moved his hand away, as if he was holding back the urge to touch you again.

—If you're glad then, why do you cry?

He asks you, genuinely curious. He was the one that wanted to bawl his eyes out, seeing the love of his life reach for the door to leave him and never come back again. However, you looked back again and shrugged at him like he did to you just a moment ago.

—I'm just sad that this is how we end. After 4 years of dating I... I just felt that you were the one I was going to marry one day.—You looked back at the door, opening it.—So I guess it's just younger Y/N lamenting the end of this relationship.

—Yeah, I understand what you mean.

You gave him a sad smile.

—I.. don't regret dating you at all, Kento. Just hope you know that.

He nodded, you took that as your sign to go.

—Goodbye, Nanami.

—Goodbye, Y/N.—He took a deep breath, whispering something.—..I love you.

But you already closed the door.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: nanami's was so short, but i swear i couldn't make this man suffer anymore he's just too good 😩 anyways, hope you enjoyed this angst! 💕

KAM'S MASTERLIST.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

Charlie: "Dad. Did you post this."

Lucifer: "Oh my 'selfie' with your dear lovely Maggie?? Why yes I DID! Do you like it!?"

Charlie: "Dad."

Lucifer: "Since she's your loving girlfriend, who you love, I thought gosh! I should really have on my social media page! Make a change from all the ducks, ha ha!"

Charlie: "Dad did you write the- the caption on it?"

Lucifer: "The c- oh yes! Well I wanted everyone to know how much I ADORE my daughter's girlfriend!!"

Charlie: "You wrote-"

Lucifer: "See, the 'bad' here means 'good'! I checked! Bad and bitch are bad on their own, but when you put them together it's like a, er, a double negative making a positive, haha! Maggie's a bad bitch- she's AWESOME- which ahaha I'm sure YOU know since you're dating her-and now all of Hell knows I think so too!!!! ISN'T THAT SWELL!"

Charlie: "But the actual whole caption says-"

Lucifer: "'ME AND THE BAD BITCH I PULLED BY BEING CHARLIE'S DAD'!"

Lucifer: "Aww and the picture turned out so great! Look!"

Lucifer: ".... you don't look super thrilled about it, Char-char."

Charlie: "Pulled, dad... Do you know what 'pulled' can mean exactly, specifically, in THIS context..?"

Lucifer: "... pulled.... into a... hug? Like in the selfie...?"

Charlie: "Dad."

Charlie: (deep breath) "I can't believe I'm saying this..."

Charlie: "You made it sound like you SLEPT WITH my girlfriend."

Lucifer: "......."

Lucifer: "Oh. HA! That's..."

Lucifer: (deflating balloon noises as he literally shrivels up into a crumpled pile of clothes mostly hidden by his hat)

Charlie: "We're not angry!"

Lucifer: ".... i m s o r r y..."

Charlie: "It's okay!!! IT'S FINE. A little mentally scarring and socially mortifying not to mention something our friends won't EVER let us live down, but- well- Just... Just-"

Charlie: "No more social media meme posting without running them past me or Vaggie first, alright!?"

Lucifer: "If I delete the post maybe no one else will see it...."

Charlie: "Everyone in Hell has already seen it, dad."

Lucifer: "..i could delete myself instead"

Charlie: "And HOW would that help?"

Lucifer: "...it would make me feel better..."

Vaggie: "Honestly sir, the most embarrassing part is how you look young enough to be my teenage son."

Charlie: "Thanks, Vaggie."

Vaggie: "Check out my stress wrinkles and scars next his baby smooth face. It's like I picked him up from a cradle somewhere."

Charlie: "Please don't joke about cradle robbing my actual father."

Vaggie: "Sorry babe."

Charlie: "I mean I'll NEVER be able to look at ANY of my parents' family portraits the same way ever AGAIN, but thank you for being SO understanding about the rumor you're dating my DAD!"

Vaggie: "Sir, what kinda skin routine are you even doing?"

Lucifer: "room full of rubber ducks and despair"

Charlie: "VAGGIE PLEASE."

Vaggie: "Sweetie, I'm ruffling his hair in the pic. It's hilarious."

Charlie: "I DON'T NEED THE REMINDER!"

Vaggie: "Feels like I'm about to call the king of hell 'kiddo' or something."

Lucifer: (a puddle on the floor) "i thought it was funny too"

Charlie: "Okay.... okay."

Charlie: "You two NEED to find a bonding activity that doesn't TRAUMATIZE me."

Vaggie: "Hmm."

Lucifer: "OH WE COULD-"

Charlie: "Or each other!"

Lucifer: "Oh well then I have nothing!"

Vaggie: "We'll always have that time you fake dated me online, sir someday dad-in-law."

Lucifer: "Our beautifully shared new horrifying past..."

Charlie: "Ha ha HA! Keep this up and either the dad part or the someday in-law part is gonna stop being accurate REAL quick!"

Vaggie: "It will?"

Charlie: "No but I'm trying to threaten you two right now so SHUSH."

[togament]

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐇𝐄'𝐒 𝐓𝐈𝐏𝐒𝐘. ume, sakura, suo, kaji, togame.

𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: mentions of alcohol, drinking it, Ume’s cuteness and extreme softness, mega warning for Ume’s I kinda got ahead of myself again (it’s longer than the others ;;), AFAB!reader, NSFW FOR TOGAME AND HIS FILTHY MOUTH, small argument in Kaji's (but he makes up for it, I swear.)

𝐔𝐦𝐞.

- responsible, of course. He doesn’t drink and would most likely be the one cleaning up after everyone when they’re wasted, handing out cold bottles of electrolytes and glasses of water. Possibly the one passing around properly proportioned drinks so he could keep an eye on everyone, handing out snacks too. The absolute best Mama Hen (Papa Rooster?) you could ask for in a house party. But if you’re the only ones awake? He sneaks in a drink or two with you. An emotional drunk. Prepare to sniffle with him as he practically thanks you for being around, for being the absolute best, for being his best friend, for making him fall in love with yo—

“You’re the best, y’know that?” He sips his drink, nursing a bottle of electrolytes in his other hand. He says it so suddenly, so abruptly, you think you misheard it. You scoot closer to your best friend, arms pressed against each other as you both lean against the wall, facing your knocked out friends. With your cheek pressed onto his shoulder, you shake your head. “Should be telling you that, Ume. The party was a success because of you. Hiragi’s parent’s antiques live to see another day.” With that, he nudges you gently with a chuckle. “C’mon let me shower you with praise, alright? Listen.” Sounding a bit serious now, he has your full attention.

He threads his fingers through yours and he squeezes once. You squeeze back. Seeing his reddened knuckles from recent scuffles, you raise your intertwined fingers to your lips to press kisses onto each knuckle as he speaks. A dusting of pink ever present on his cheeks. You swear you could hear his heart beating at the same rhythm as yours is.

“I…” He pauses, tearing his eyes away from you for a moment before he looks into yours once more. Determined. Eyebrows slightly furrowed. “I think I love you—“, another pause, he shakes his head. You squeeze his hand in return to steady him and he gives you a smile you’ve never seen him give you before. Your heart’s beating double time now. “I—I know I love you. I do. More than just a friend, a companion. I know you might not feel the same way, maybe you see me as family and that’s fine but I just—“ “I love you too, idiot.” You interrupt his overthinking before continuing, “Always have. More than a friend, actually.”

If your friends weren’t a few feet from you both he’d scoop you up and twirl you around. Hell, if he had a tail he’d be wagging it nonstop by now. Your hands, now sweaty, are still intertwined. He’s practically beaming with sunlight, ready to burst. While you’re basking in it. Your sun. Your sun.

You both kissed each other that night with the taste of cheap whiskey and electrolytes on your lips.

𝐒𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐫𝐚.

- Asian glow, meet Sakura. Sakura puts the Asian glow to shame, my guy. He’s got a tomato for a head when he drinks. You’re not even touching or kissing him, he’s just… RED. Doesn’t like getting plastered but when he does get a couple of drinks in? He’s screaming for you every second, looking for you, needing you around him. (Nirei’s sprinting to look for you, Suo’s making Sakura drink enough water, Ume’s preparing a cold bottle of pocari sweat for him.) What normally would make Sakura run away screaming would now make him actually, fully accept it. You can feel him melt into you, pressing his cheek to yours. He’s a very clingy drunk. The others don’t point it out as much. They don’t want to poke the (extremely, extremely clingy) bear.

“Where is she???” He literally screams into the crowd, getting on his tippy toes and hopping over heads just to get a glance of you hopefully walking towards him. Nirei’s already lost in the group of people, weaving through them to get to you. Thankfully, you’re just at the kitchen whipping up a couple more drinks when Nirei finally found you. “He’s at it again, huh?” You say as you take a swig from your drink, looking at a messy haired Nirei. He looks like he went through hell and back. “Y-yeah. I think you should go. He’s been groaning for you nonstop-“ Nirei then guides you through the crowd, hand on your wrist so you wouldn’t get lost.

He pulls you towards Sakura whose now lounging on the couch. You both were hoping for a relieved Sakura but instead are met with your bicolor haired lover staring daggers into Nirei and his steady grip on your wrist. Nirei immediately lets go and as he does, Sakura pulls you into his lap causing your drink to spill a little, dribbling down your cheek and your neck. “What the hell Saku—“ you’re interrupted by him licking a strip up your neck, lapping at the spilled drink. His hands grow more possessive as they hold you closer to him, kneading your flesh through your clothes.

“Missed ya,” he mutters into your neck, nuzzling his nose into it like a kitten would. “Where’d ya run off to? Been looking everywhere for you, baby.” he’s a completely different person when he’s tipsy, clingy and touchy, not really caring if your friends see him practically claiming his spot as YOUR lover. “Went to make some drinks. Don’t tell me you need me with you all the time.” You tease him. While he’d normally blush and stammer at that, he’s now pressing kisses into your cheek, smiling into each one.

“Mhm. Need ya all the damn time, angel. Don’t leave.”

𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐅𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐔𝐓.

𝐒𝐮𝐨.

- doesn’t drink (he doesn’t eat either so—) He really just doesn’t like drinking alcohol. He gets the appeal, sure. He could go for a couple of glasses, sure. He could maybe finish 2 bottles of whiskey by himself and not feel a thing, SURE. But he doesn’t like drinking it. He’s more of like a casual enjoyer, maybe having a finger or two of whiskey on the rocks with friends. Always the one cleaning up after them (Nirei) too. But when it’s just the both of you though, it’s a different story. Sure you can’t tell if he’s plastered or not from the get go but there’s a tell. He’s more… open with his emotions.

“You look gorgeous in that dress, my dove,” you turn slowly to your lover who’s eyeing you down from beside you. You’re both at one of the booths of the speakeasy you frequent, away from curious eyes. By the way he’s looking at you, you feel like he’s undressing you with his eyes almost. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows dryly. Is he blushing? You can’t tell under the dim lighting, “Absolutely—gorgeous,” he ghosts his fingers along your curves, his gaze following the invisible path he’s drawn out. Making sure to go extra, extra slow around your derrière before he pulls his hand away to take a swig of his drink.

“What’s gotten into you tonight? Drunk already?” You say while you reach over to straighten his suit out, trying your damndest not to let your growing arousal show. You swear you can feel the booth heating up. “Drunk off the alcohol? Oh, dearest no. Off of you, however? Well…” He’s staring at you from over his rocks glass. The ice clinks as he puts it down on the table.

“How could I not? I could drink you in all fucking night.” There’s that tell. There’s the swearing. You pause, meeting his heavily lidded gaze. You swallow. “Care to give me a taste, dove?”

You feel his fingers creep up your leg and you part them so willingly. Nobody’ll peek into your booth. Not with your lover around.

𝐊𝐚𝐣𝐢.

- Lightweight to Average drinker. He’s a sleepy drunk but he doesn’t want anyone seeing him in such a vulnerable state so he often opts to bail or not drink at all. Most of the time he bails though. Not about that social drinking life. Only you could manage to convince him to come with though. You’re always met with the tiniest amount of resistance but you can manage, right? (He’s got a soft spot for you. Of course he’d go. You don’t have to ask twice. He just likes seeing you pout when he says no the first time. It’s cute.) Still, don’t get him drunk please don’t—oh no he’s got a bottle in his hand. He’s guzzling it. Oh no. Ohhh no.

You’re in Hiragi’s bed, hidden under the covers with your lover’s arms wrapped around your waist and his face resting on your shoulder now fast asleep. How’d you both find yourselves here? Well, first, Kaji ended up breaking a couple of glasses (he swears it was an accident), then almost started a couple of fights (you know how he is with his mouth), then tried napping on the couch with you while everybody’s drinking (he was complaining about the noise but… it’s a party, Kaji.) Hiragi, thankfully, allowed you both to hole up in his room for a little while to sober up. Locked inside with a couple of bottles of pocari sweat (care of Umemiya!), you’re intertwined now.

You sigh, flicking your boyfriend’s forehead gently, “idiot,” he winces, tightening his grip around your waist to pull you closer. Thank god he’s mellower now. “Ow—shit! What’d you do that for?” He rubs his forehead on your cheek, HIS cheeks slightly blushing from the alcohol. “You shouldn’t have drunk too much-“ “Well you brought me here what was I supposed to d-“ “Oh I don’t know, not drink an entire bottle in one sit—“ You feel his lips against yours, the tiny argument now forgotten. You can taste the alcohol and some sweetness from his lollipop from earlier. Then you hear something you never thought you’d hear fall from his mouth willingly.

“…sorry.” Huh. You angle away to take a proper look at him. He only grumbles and hides deeper into your neck, using the covers as a shield against from you. He’s acting so needy and soft. If he wasn’t so tipsy you would have pounced on him to pepper kisses along his cheeks. You attempt to pull the blanket down but he’s holding it so tightly. “Say that again, baby? You’re what?” You can’t hide the smile from your lips but then he pinches your side causing you to yelp. “Y’heard me the first time.” Rolling your eyes, you nuzzle into his touch. “C’mon just a tiny one? The tiniest little sowwy? Fow me?” You whisper and you’re only met with three kisses on your forehead.

“I love you. Sorry.” You smile, bringing up Hiragi’s comfortable blanket over your sleepy bodies.

“Love you too, idiot.”

𝐓𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐦𝐞.

Is an absolute lightweight so he ends up being a sleepy drunk or doesn’t drink at all. But with you around and he’s had maybe a drink and a half in his system? He’s absolutely feral. So touchy, SO so SOOOOO horny when he’s got even the slightest amount of alcohol in his system to get him tipsy. He’s touching you, caressing your face, your arms, your ass (if you’d allow him to. The man understands boundaries.) While he’s normally so soft spoken around you, teasing you in his own silly, dorky way, he’s a different man when he's tipsy. His vocabulary is a different beast. Sloppy and direct. His 6’2” frame and entire weight practically leaning onto you for support on Hiragi’s family couch — to some he looks as though he’s dozing off. It’s anything BUT that. He’s whispering the dirtiest, raunchiest things into your ear, teasing you with that deep voice of his. He knows what he’s doing. You like it, of course.

“I’m so fucking hard right now, doll—god it’s throbbing.” He whines softly into your neck, breathing so heavily you swear his body’s quivering. That voice does things to you and he KNOWS it. “Wanna fuck yet throat. Have my cum spillin’ down yer mouth, yer chest….fuck—y’put a spell on me, didn’t ya? Makin’ me wanna fuck all the damn time.” He ends it with a chuckle, peppering slow, loving kisses along your neck, clearly doesn’t care if anybody sees you both now. “Y’know, when yer not around, I fuck my fist to the thought of ya, of yer ass bouncing on me, of yer pussy dripping into my fingers. God I wanna fuck ya so badly right now—“ You can’t help it. You cross your legs to have some relief and you shift your weight slightly, feeling your throbbing clit pressed in between.

“Crossing your legs like that—yer getting off of this aren’t you? Wanna fuck me too huh?” He whispers, drawing it out slowly with a slight purr.

You nod and you can feel him perk up a little. He eases up as he stands slowly, pulling you up with him. He’s leading you down the hallway, away from the prying eyes of your peers. They’re all too busy to care where the both of you are headed.

“There’s a vacant room ‘round back. Hiragi wouldn’t mind, wouldn’t he?”

a/n: huuurrrr pulled this out of my bum I hope you like it omg I literally wrote Togame's half asleep asjdk also feeling very bad for Hiragi and his house. kaji part dedicated to @kajibunny and our late morning rambles btw ohoho i mahal na mahal u come get your man!!!!

[11cupid-tarot11]

A Letter From Your Future Spouse

➽───────────────❥

1 -> 4

Cupid's Services Cupid's Master List Socials

Tips appreciated!

C@sh app and P@ypal only!

$minnieplant3

@janellec03

LOVE U

- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.

︻デ═一 ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 1- Four of Wands, The Fool, Page of Swords, Nine of Cups, Page of Wands, The Wheel of Fortune.

"Hi you! I've been sleeping a lot, can't seem to do anything else lately because of how tired I've been. Finally. I can sleep as much as I want to now because of a situation that just so happened to end recently. Death.

What now? See, I've been wondering the same thing. But let's not even worry about it, let's just sleep as much as we want to because we finally can, even if it's only a little nap time out of your day do it because I gotta see you one last time later, I've got a message for you in your dreams. Spirit will tell you, don't worry about missing it or when <3

Resting so much so when I do have to work, you know, find that balance again between work and fun, I can focus on what's so important to me a lot better, I mean really give it my all... You know? Lol

Sorry, I dream a lot, you might notice my head is always in the clouds. I have very air energy like a Gemini.

Things are finally clearing up for me! I feel at peace, maybe we mirror each other and things are also getting better for you too? You have to let me know, okay? I feel like I can finally breathe again, be optimistic without being scared the rug is going to get snatched from underneath.

I've been working so so hard on my craft, putting in so much love and effort into my work and I feel really hopeful that all of my productivity will pay off soon, consistency is key, right?

I really like the color yellow, 😄 talk again soon!"

Hope you enjoyed! Don't forget to do the poll below 👇🏾 ✨

✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

Pile 2- Knight of Wands, I forgot to write down the rest of the cards I'm so sorry 😞

"I have no problem with putting in hard work for anything I want, even you, you know? If you don't want me the moment we catch eyes I'll make you ;)

The moment I catch you I'm going to make sure I never stop loving you, I'll make sure every day is beautiful, even on our bad days we'll kiss each other good night before bed still. I love you!

Why do you keep worrying yourself? All of that doubt in that pretty little head of yours isn't good, you should lay it all to rest before you make yourself sick baby. Sleep more, practice some self care before you run yourself crazy, okay?

I'm so proud of you, you know, for whatever amazing things you've accomplished lately. I believe in you, I'll always be your #1 cheerleader!

You should go out and celebrate! Enjoy the sun, you deserve it my angel! Promise me you won't let this go by like it's just not that big and you'll go out and do something? Pinky promise?

Stay focused! You're on the right path, you're doing amazing! I promise you, all of this will be worth it, it's worth our future 💓 keep going, I know you can do it! 🎉"

Hope you enjoy!!☺️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!

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Pile 3- Queen of Cups, Justice, Four of Cups, The Moon, Three of Swords, The Star.

" Hi my love, you know I don't talk a lot haha, so I'll make this quick as usual and get out of your hair so you can go on.

I just want to remind you, you're my queen, my favorite, my whole world ❤️ I think red looks really pretty on you btw but anyway, I love and miss you like crazy at times like these.

I am going through something right now, a legal situation, a situation I wish would come to an end right now because it's so heavy on me, it's hurting me but I know at the same time it's happening to me because it's part of my karma, something that's forcing me to look so closely at myself, at every shadow because I think it leads me to you. My everything. We're going to get married, I'm so sure of it.

I'm keeping hope alive, I'm hanging on to every thread of it I've got. I'm working on everything right now, I'll catch up with you soon sweetheart 💋 I'm going to kiss you when I do, you won't be able to get rid of me. ;) "

Hope you enjoy! Don't forget to do the poll below!!

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Pile 4- Ace of Cups, The Hanged Man, King of Wands, Nine of Cups, Knight of Cups, Nine of Wands.

"I want to come to you with amazing news but I can't, I'm sorry to say, I've taken a turn for the worst right now. Don't worry, it's temporary.

I am slowly building myself back up, that's what I'm doing right now if you're wondering what I've been doing all this time. I'm healing day by day and I hope you are too sweetheart. I might be a bit stuck and tangled up right now, but I'm clearing through it!

I'm the kind of guy who will pursue you with nothing but kindness until I make you fall for me with your charm, I'm cute, I know I am, you'll love me, I have curly light hair, and a really cute smile. You'll think I'm so adorable.

I want to offer my heart to you, fully, 100%. You have me, all of me as long as you give me you in return, I hope you do, I can't be without you once I know you.

Take care my love ❤️."

Hope you enjoyed ❤️ Don't forget to do the poll below!!

[neil-gaiman]

Hi Mr. Gaiman (sorry for the ramble in advance),

Hope you're doing well. I don't usually use tumblr, but every time I open it up you're here so I figure I'd drop a note. I'm a writer, but I've always had a really hard time actually WRITING instead of just thinking about it. I've had this world and its characters plaguing my head for years now, and it's only gotten worse with age, so recently I doubled down and decided it was gonna get done—one way or the other.

I recently read a passage in a book about writing that said, in essence, your first book doesn't really matter all that much if you plan to be an author. As an autistic lad, I (naturally) took this very literally and was upset at the thought. Sure, your first work is probably going to be your weakest—duh, because by the time book two rolls around you'll have had time to have faced any criticisms from your first, you'll have learned more as you write, and about the world too. But for your first book to not matter at all, no matter how passionate you are about it—I found myself wondering, "Well, what's the point at all, then?" You put in all that work, you learn plot devices, you breathe life into your characters and watch 'em toddle around, and for what? For it to just be a stepping stone? It felt intensely personal of it just being cast aside like that, and I haven't even written the damn thing yet!

MasterClass had a Father's Day sale, so I figured "why not" and went ahead and got a subscription. First thing I did was run to your class, and although I've only watched the first two parts—I want to thank you for restoring my motivation. Truth is, I think the reason that message in the writing book upset me so much is because I'm terrified of writing this damn book. I've woven so many pieces of myself into it, despite it very much being, in your words, a lie (and about a boy that lies all the time, no less), but the grief that I feel and all the complicated feelings about forgiveness are all there and very real, despite its fantastical elements. So much of it really IS more than I'm comfortable sharing with people, and the idea of baring all that out and being told it didn't matter at all? Absolutely devastating. At the end of the line? The book might actually suck. I might rewrite it, I might trash it, I might completely forget about it ten years from now, or I might sell ten copies on Amazon to family and friends and then move on with my life. It's not stepping on a yellow jacket nest in the woods, but it's still terrifying. I still can't even fathom the idea of letting anyone actually read it until I've obsessed over it for another four years, and even then! But I'll write it anyways.

Thank you.

You are so welcome!

[latanyalove]

Portgas D Ace - How He Flirts

Pairing: Ace x Y/N

Content: Jealousy, misunderstandings, light angst, hurt/comfort

A/n: I might have rushed this because I wanted this out before the year was over. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did writing this! <3

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

- Portgas D. Ace is known for his charming and flirtatious nature.

- He has a way of making women feel desired and captivated.

- Ace's flirting style is unique, characterized by his confident and playful nature.

- He often uses eye contact to establish a strong connection with his targets.

- Ace is known for his witty banter and clever pick-up lines.

- He knows how to tease and make women laugh, creating an intimate atmosphere.

- Ace is skilled at reading body language and uses it to gauge a woman's interest.

- He often compliments women on their beauty, intelligence, or accomplishments.

You were in the club with the rest of the Whitebeard Pirates, enjoying the music and dancing the night away. They were all in high spirits, celebrating their recent victories and looking forward to the future.

You had been sitting with Marco, sipping on your drinks, as you watched the Fireboy move from one group of ladies to the next with ease. His smooth talking and charm had the entire club captivated.

Despite your best efforts, you couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy in your chest as you watched him. He had a way of making everyone feel special, but you wished he would have given you some of his attention instead.

You wanted to be the one he was talking to, the one he was giving his attention to.

"You know if you keep looking him like that, then he might actually notice,"

You jumped, looking over to where the voice came from to see Marco glancing at you with a mischievous smile on his face.

"What are you talking about?" you said, trying to hide the light blush that had started to spread across your cheeks.

Marco chuckled and took a sip from his drink. "You know what I'm talking about," he said. "Just don't be too obvious about it. If you play your cards right, he might take the hint."

"I'm not sure if I'm ready for that," I said, shaking my head. "I mean, I don't even know if he would be interested in me. I don't want to put myself out there and make a fool of myself."

Marco smiled and said, "You might be surprised. You never know until you try. And there's no harm in expressing your interest."

You nodded, glancing at Ace one more time before turning your gaze away, your heart fluttering nervously. You took a deep breath and made a silent wish that maybe, just maybe, he would notice you. . . .

You were laughing and chatting with your new drinking buddies, enjoying the music and the atmosphere.

You felt free and at peace, and you couldn't help but smile as you watched everyone around you having the time of their lives.

You had forgotten all about Ace and were just living in the moment.

That was until you felt someone grab your hand.

"Excuse me, miss," the old man said with a lecherous grin. "You look like you could use some company. How about you and I have a little private dance?"

You quickly pulled your hand away, disgusted by his advances. "No thank you,"

"Why not?" He persisted.

"I have a boyfriend," you lied, hoping it would deter him.

But instead of backing off, the old man chuckled and replied, "Oh, is that so? Well, where is he then? I don't see him anywhere."

"I'm right here," he said, a voice filled with protectiveness. You turned around to see Ace standing there with a serious expression. The old man's grin faded as he realized he had crossed a line, and he quickly made his exit.

Ace, fully turned towards you, looked at you with concern and asked, "Are you okay?"

Ace's eyes softened as he gently touched the place where the man had grabbed you, his touch sending a wave of warmth through your body.

Y/N, don't fall for him even more. He does this to every woman in need of saving.

You're not special.

Without saying a word, you ran away from him, your heart pounding in your chest. You sprinted through the crowded streets, desperate to put as much distance between you and Ace as possible.

It wasn't until you stopped to catch your breath that you realized you had no idea where you had ended up.

As you stood there, panting and disoriented, you felt the first droplets of rain hit your face. Within seconds, the light drizzle turned into a heavy downpour, soaking you to the bone.

The rain poured down on you, mixing with your tears, you couldn't help but let out a sob. The combination of the physical and emotional pain became too overwhelming to bear, and you found yourself breaking down in the middle of the unfamiliar street.

"Y/N! Y/N!"

You jumped at the voice of Ace, shocked at how he had followed you all the way.

Dreading the look on his face, you still turned around to see Ace standing there, rain-soaked and concerned. His eyes searched yours, filled with worry and regret.

"Y/N?" he said softer, his voice filled with genuine concern and regret.

"Why did you follow me all the way here?" You asked.

"I couldn't just let you run off like that," Ace replied, his voice laced with sincerity. "I care about you, Y/N. I wanted to make sure you're okay."

"Is that what you say to every woman in need?" You blurted out, your voice filled with anger and hurt.

Ace's shocked expression quickly turned into one of remorse as he realized the impact of his actions.

"No, Y/N," he said earnestly, his voice filled with regret.

You couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment and betrayal, even though you two weren't even dating. The realization that Ace's protective nature might be more of a habit than a genuine emotion made you question the authenticity of his actions towards you.

You decided that since you weren't going to have a chance with him, you might as well tell him.

"Ace, I've liked you for a while and I know-" You started, your eyes fixated on the muddy floor.

You didn't hear his footsteps, but suddenly your face was raised up by Ace's gentle touch. His hand cupped your chin, lifting your gaze to meet his eyes.

Your heart skipped a beat as you noticed the proximity between your faces, the warmth of his hand against your skin. Despite the closeness, there was still a hint of uncertainty lingering in the space between you, as if both of you were waiting for the other to make a move.

"Can I kiss you?"

You nodded, a mix of nervousness and anticipation flooding your senses. Without wasting any time, Ace closed the distance between you and pressed his lips against yours, the taste of rain and longing intertwining in the kiss.

It was a moment filled with both vulnerability and a glimmer of hope, as if the downpour had washed away the doubts and fears that had kept you apart for so long.

When the both of us broke away from each other, Ace started speaking.

"I like you too Y/N, I- I was just scared of how you would react if I confessed,"

"Scared?" You would never think the Fire Fist Ace was scared of anything.

"Yes, I mean who would Iike a monster like me in the first place?"

"Me," You interrupted, "I mean not the monster part because you're not a monster-"

A quick kiss shut you up immediately.

You started to pout, "You need to stop interrupting me when I'm talking,"

"But it's so nice to kiss you, I can't stop," He admitted shamelessly, his cheeks blushing immensely.

You laughed at his bad flirting skills.

"H- Hey! It's not funny!" He pouted.

At moment, you realised that you were special to him. He blushed when he flirted with you, he stuttered when he is with you and loves you more than those girls in the bar. . . .

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

"So you're telling me that you were jealous of the girls in the bar?" Ace teased you with his famous grin as he leaned against you.

"Well yeah," You mumbled, crossing your arms in embarrassment. Maybe you did slightly overreact.

Ace then hugged your side, winking. "I'm sorry for making you jealous, let me treat you tonight,"

[huevoconfrijoles]

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ Guess *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

Summary: he wants to guess the color of my underwear

Authors note: I’m so down bad for Joost it’s crazy.

Today was the day I decided to tidy up my room. The closet door barely even closed with all the clothes sprawled on the floor from times in which I swore to myself I would pick them up once I got home. I groaned, looking at the mess I made myself.

I managed to fix and rearrange most of my closet, but not without distractions. I found a bunch of clothes I stole from Joost including shirts and hoodies that were too big for my own body. The scent of his cologne lingered on my nose.

God, I miss him.

Wait, he hasn’t even texted me.

It was getting late, so I showered and got in bed, putting whatever show I came across first on Netflix for background noise. It was another hour before I received a text from Joost.

we just got done

you up? :p

Of course, I was up and he knew it. I can’t sleep without telling him goodnight. I mean I can, but I don't want to

yes im upp

im sleepy tho

I snapped a quick picture in bed showing off the shirt I had clearly stolen from him. A white t-shirt that read ‘I ❤️ Joost Klein’. That man loved himself maybe a bit more than me. I don’t mind.

what are you wearing? 🤨

a shirt lol

just a shirt then?

ofc not 🙄 im wearing stuff under too

i hope it’s another joost klein shirt with joost klein socks. he’s a cool guy.

yeah he’s the bestt

and unfortunately it’s not another joost klein shirt sorry 😔

i don’t know i might need proof

My cheeks started to burn up. He’s not even here next to me, and he knows how to make me flustered.

Fuck it.

I quickly pull off the sheets and roll my top up a bit just so there’s under boob.

see. just 1 joost klein top here.

id rather there be no top involved.

But let’s not say

My heart jumps at the notification.

1 image attachment

joost klein underwear over here

Like I said, that man loved himself more than me at this point.

I'm going to need some of those underwear

I’m sure the ones you have on right now are wayyy better than some loser named joost klein…

i bite the inside of my cheek at the thought of where this conversation is heading.

wouldn’t you like to know

i would.

what color are they?

He’s such a guy, of course he’d want to know

guess

pink

see through?

no idea (i’m a visual learner btw)

I soon got an incoming FaceTime call from a red-cheeked Joost.

“So was I right? ” His face was illuminated, but I could see the tiredness in his eyes mixed with lust.

“Not even close”, I laughed and sat up a bit.

“You’re lying, let me seppe.”

I gently bite the side of my lip while I fulfilled his wish. I lift the oversize shirt that was covering my lower half painfully slowly. So much that Joost groans out of frustration.

“Such a tease” he muttered.

I finally gave him a peek at my black lacy undergarment. The look on his face was pure desperation. He roughly swallows and ruffles his hair.

“I wish I was there with you” he says.

“I know baby” I said, looking into his blue eyes through the screen.

“ Can you touch yourself for me?” he quietly asks, to which I nod and comply.

My hand travels down from my chest to my thighs, my phone in the other tracking my actions.

I could hear his phone shake a bit. He adjusted the position so that his upper torso and lower half of his body were in the frame.

He palms himself through the tight fabric of his boxers. Soft moans escape his mouth every so often as his eyes follow my every move. His gaze never faltering from the screen.

My hand travels down to push the lace fabric to the side. My fingers work in a fast motion against the slickness, dipping in and out occasionally.

Our moans fill the atmosphere in my room. We both come down from our highs and are a panting mess.

“I love you, but now I have to go clean up the mess you made me do” he says, winking at me through the screen.

[ladylovesloki]

The Fated Apple: Part Seven

Pairings: Loki X Reader

Warnings: Language, fluff ☺️☺️

Summary: Back on Asgard. Loki wakes.

A/N: You guys inspired me so much I banged out this part and half of part 8 already. Thank you all so much for your enthusiasm and your kind words. I never thought I was much of a writer but you guys make me think otherwise. Thank you 💚

Enjoy💚

Part One

Part Two

Part Three

Part Four

Part Five

Part Six

Loki tries to open his eyes but it is a struggle.

It felt like he was under water, all of the sounds around him are muffled and seem miles away.

“Loki come on..I know you can do it.”

Your voice cuts through all of the muddled sound and he follows it like a guiding light. Finally he is able to open one eye and sees you staring down at him.

“There you are.”, you smile gently.

“Y/n..”, Loki struggles to speak but starts coughing, his lungs still feel the heat from Muspelheim.

You call out for Eir and she hurries over with one of her healers who is holding a goblet of water. They help Loki sit up and you take the goblet from the healer to help him drink yourself.

He’s finally able to open both eyes and he can’t seem to take them off of you.

“How do you feel?”, you ask him.

“Like I was just tortured by a fire demon…how am I here?”

“What’s the last thing you remember?”

He looks up and closes his eyes, “I remember Alarian taunting me..being chained to a slab..the heat..and then…nothing.”

You nod tears filling your eyes, “I’m so sorry. We got there as fast as we could..we were almost too late.”

“We? What do you mean…we?”

“Well…Surtr wanted something that we could not give him without putting everything at risk..so we came up with a plan to save you without giving him the sword.”

“You’re still not explaining the we…”

“We..well..I decided that I wanted to be there to bring you back..”

“But..the antidote..when we left the antidote Eir had was ineffective.”

“It was..so…I…had Idunn bring her apple to Eir and..”

Loki looks at you with heartbreak in his eyes, “no…y/n…you should not have done that for me.”

“What else was I supposed to do?! He was going to kill you and everyone else if we gave in and gave him that sword. So Thor and I came up with a plan to trick Surtr. Frigga created a replica of the sword for us to give to Surtr and we brought the real one with us so that he could feel the swords power..as soon as we handed it over he…”, the tears you were holding back finally fall down your face.

Loki weakly reaches a shaky hand up to wipe them away.

You put your hand over the one he has placed on your cheek, “as soon as he had the sword he swung for you. The sword disintegrated in his hand and Thor killed him with the true one.”

Loki’s eyes widen, “Surtr is dead? Gods..”

You nod, “yea..I thought you were dead.”, more tears fall and land on Loki’s hand that is still on your cheek.

“I can’t believe Thor let you put yourself in danger. You should not have been there.”

“And you shouldn’t have pretended to be a whole other person to get to know me but here we are.”

Loki looks down and removes his hand from your face, “yes. I…I am so sorry y/n. Truly. I did not mean to deceive you..”

“Then why? Why didn’t you just come to me as yourself?”

“Because I saw how comfortable you were speaking with Ana…I didn’t believe you would be so at ease with me if I were in my true form…I wasn’t exactly kind to you before Idunn’s ritual.”

“I wasn’t exactly nice to you either Loki. I wanted to get to know you not Ana..”

“I am so sorry..If I could take it back I would. I would have revealed my true self that first day I was just too…weak. Watching you learn, seeing your smile..I did not believe I would see that side of you if I was myself. But when I took you to see Yddrasil and saw the wonder and openness on your face I knew I had to tell you the truth.”

“Oh you mean it had nothing to do with your mother telling you that you had to tell me the truth?”

Loki looks down again with a shy smile, “she did have some sway in my decision as well but truly I wanted to tell you the moment you saw me as Ana. As I told your sister I…”

“I know..she told me..just..don’t lie to me like that again..ok?”

He nods, “I promise you..but you need to also promise me to never put yourself in such danger again. When I saw you collapse that day I almost went mad.”

“Yea so much so you went to a realm that is literally the least hospitable to your kind.”

“Yes well…”, he takes your hand in his. “I have grown quite fond of you..”

You smile and squeeze his hand, “yea I guess I’m a little fond of you too. I look forward to spending time with you when you’re actually you.”

“It was me..every word I said to you..everything we did together..I promise you none of that was a lie..”

You see Loki’s eyes start to droop, “I believe you. You need to rest. You still have a lot of recuperating to do.”

Loki nods, “yes, breathing is a bit of a task at the moment.”

As if he summoned her, Eir returns with a vial, “here my Prince drink this. It will help with that.”

Loki goes to take the vial but you see how much his hand is shaking so you reach out and take it from Eir. Loki looks to you and smiles, you place a hand on the back of his head and he tilts back slightly so you can help him drink the elixir.

He closes his eyes, enjoying the relief. When he opens them he looks at you and smiles, “thank you.”

You smile back, “you’re welcome. Get some sleep.”

Loki lays back down and closes his eyes, enjoying the feeling of your hand on his. “Will you be here when I wake?”

You nod. Comforted by your answer Loki closes his eyes again and goes to sleep.

****************************************************

A few days pass and Loki is finally allowed to leave the healers wing. He still has some healing to do but Eir said it would be ok for him to do so in the comfort of his own chambers. Which made things a little…awkward for you. It was one thing to be at his bedside in the healers wing but in his rooms? You weren’t sure how to navigate your relationship now since you took Idunn’s apple tonic.

Loki saw your hesitation to stay in his rooms and offered to go back to the healers wing if it meant you would feel more comfortable to be with him, but you couldn’t let him do that. He deserved to be comfortable in his own bed, surrounded by the things that comforted him and if one of those things is you then you would remain by his side.

It was getting late and Loki was starting to fall asleep so you stood from your chair next to his bed to leave, but he grabs your hand before you can move any further.

“Where are you going?”, he asks tiredly.

“Back to my rooms..you need to rest.”

“Stay. Please.”

You think about it for a moment and the sad, tired look in his eyes breaks you. “Ok, I’ll have the maids help me move the settee in here, I can sleep on that.”

“Nonsense. The bed is large enough for both of us. I promise I don’t even have the energy to do anything untoward.”

You take a moment to think about what you want to do but Loki senses your indecisiveness, “forgive me. It was foolish of me to ask. You deserve rest after everything you have been through, I should not have asked this of you.”

You shake your head, “no..it’s ok..I’ll stay.”

“You are certain?”, he asks with hope in his tired eyes.

You nod, “I’m just going to go change and get ready for bed in my rooms. I’ll be right back.”

Loki smiles and nods, you give his hand a final squeeze and leave his room. As soon as you get to your chambers you see Jane waiting for you inside.

“Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in.”

You roll your eyes, “ha ha. I’m just here to change for bed and then I’m going back to Loki.”

“Oh? Having a sleep over?”

“He asked me to stay…”, you admit with a smile.

“Uh huh..”

“What?!”

“Nothing..I’m just…happy for you.”

“You’re reading too much into it Jane, he just doesn’t want to be alone right now.”

“Oh please. The man is falling in love with you…and I think you’re falling in love with him too.”

“That’s a leap Jane.”

“Oh come on y/n. You haven’t left his side in days, you’ve been helping him heal, eat and now you’re going to spend the night with him?”

“He just wants some comfort and familiarity..”

“He wants the woman who he is going to spend eternity with to be by his side.”

You look down at the nightgown you picked out from your closet, “it’s all so daunting. How am I supposed to be that for him? How can I measure up to being all of that.”

Jane walks over, takes your nightgown and places it on your bed. She then takes your hands in hers, “You don’t need to do anything but be you y/n. You are what he needs.”

“I should go..he’s probably going to fall asleep thinking I changed my mind.”, you pick up your nightgown and go to your bathing chambers to change and freshen up for bed.

Jane stops you again, “I’m leaving in the morning.”

“What? Why?”

“I have to get back to work y/n. I only stayed this long because of everything that was happening but with Thor and I being over… My work is waiting for me. Selvig is waiting for me. I have to go.”

You bring your sister in for a tight hug, “I understand. I’m going to miss you.”

“I’ll be back, Heimdall promised to show me a few things to help me with my research. I’m hoping I can bring Selvig and Darcy with me next time.”

You smile, “Darcy will shit herself when she gets here.”

“I know I’m gonna have to keep her on a leash.”

You laugh and pull her back into another hug, “Im so sorry Jane. I know that you really loved Thor. I feel like I stole something from you.”

Jane pulls away, “no. I never want you to feel that way. Yes, I love Thor but it wasn’t meant to be. You and Loki are. Don’t let your guilt or whatever you’re feeling stop you from feeling whatever you are starting to feel for Loki. I’m happy for you. And who knows? Maybe I’ll find me another Asgardian hunk and Idunn will give me a pity apple.”

You hug one last time before Jane says goodnight with a promise to see you before she goes back to Earth. You finally change into your night clothes and finish getting ready for bed before you make your way back to Loki’s room. When you get there he is already asleep. You can see that he must be having a bad dream of some sort because his brow is furrowed and his skin is flushed. You walk over to the bed and kneel down on it, gently placing your hand on his forehead.

Loki’s eyes shoot open and he grabs your wrist, “no! No more! Please!”

“Loki..Loki..shh..it’s me..it’s y/n.”

He loosens his grip on your wrist, “y/n? What?…Where?”. He starts looking around frantically, trying to figure out where he is.

“You’re on Asgard. You’re in your chambers. You’re safe.”, you repeat those words over and over until you see he is starting to calm and come back to reality.

“Y/n..Gods..I’m sorry..I must’ve been dreaming..”

You card your fingers through his hair which is soaked with his sweat, you stand from the bed but Loki tightens his grip once more. “I’ll be right back.”

You stand from the bed and go to his bathing chambers to get a wet washcloth. You bring it back to his bed and once again kneel next to him, placing the cool wet cloth on his forehead.

“Mmm..”, he sighs in relief.

“Better?”, you ask.

He nods and smiles, “you came back.”

“Of course. I told you I would didn’t I?”

“You certainly did. I’m sorry, sleep must’ve taken over me not long after you left.”

“Do not apologize, you need your rest. I’m sorry I took so long, Jane was waiting for me in my room when I got there. She’s leaving tomorrow.”

He reaches up and removes the cloth from his forehead, “oh..will you be returning to Earth with her then?”

“Do you want me to?”

Loki looks deeply into your eyes, “I want you to be happy and if that means you returning to your home world I would understand. But no..to answer your question. I do not want you to go. I want to continue to get to know you. To learn what the Norn’s have planned for us. Together.”

You take his hand in yours, “I want that too Loki. I’m not going anywhere.”

He breathes out a sigh of relief, “good.”

You can see he is fighting sleep, “come on, let’s get to sleep. I have to be up to say goodbye to Jane in the morning.”

Loki nods and you lay down next to him, his hand still in yours.

****************************************************

When you wake up you’re not in the same position you were when you fell asleep. Instead of laying next to Loki, you are now laying on his chest. His arm wrapped around you and his nose is buried in your hair. You move slightly to look up to his face and your movement wakes him as well.

He gives you a shy smile, “good morning darling.”

You blush, “morning..”

You feel his fingers lightly grazing your arm, he’s moving them up and down causing goosebumps to break out all over your skin.

“I should get up. Jane will be leaving soon.”

“Yes..we should get up and ready for the day.”

Neither of you move, instead you both stay wrapped in each others arms and continue staring into each others eyes.

You can’t take the suspense anymore and decide to make the first move, you give him a small peck on the corner of his mouth and quickly remove yourself from his arms. You stand up out of bed and start speed walking to his bath chamber, as soon as you close the door you place your hand over your chest to calm your beating heart.

You take a moment to freshen up and when you leave the bathroom Loki is already out of bed waiting for you.

“Hi.”, you say shyly, blushing like an idiot.

“Hi.”, he repeats back with a small smile.

He walks over to you, standing so close you have to look up to see his face. He starts to lean down, his eyes glued to your lips…

“Brother!!!”, Thor swings the door open interrupting whatever Loki was planning on doing.

The both of you separate so quickly you smack your head against the door behind you.

“Thor! You absolute oaf.”, he walks back over to you and places his hand on the back of your head soothing your slight discomfort from the impact.

“My apologies, I did not know you were here my lady.”, Thor apologizes with a goofy smile on his face.

You place your hand on Loki’s chest, silently telling him you were ok. “It’s ok Thor, I was just leaving to find Jane.”

You take two steps away from Loki but then you feel him tug you back to him, “I shall see you soon yes?”

You smile and nod at him, he leans down and gives you a quick kiss on the cheek and you feel his magic all over your body. You look down and see that he has changed your nightgown into a beautiful gown and you feel completely refreshed.

You smile, “thank you.”

He nods, “go find your sister, I shall see you soon.”

You leave the brothers to go find Jane.

Loki walks over to Thor and smacks him on the back of the head, “I’m going to dump you on the shittiest realm I can find and leave you there.”

Thor rubs the back of his head and laughs, “oh please, like you won’t have another opportunity to woo your fated love.”

Loki rolls his eyes, “what did you want anyway?”

“Mother wishes to see us.”

“Very well, after you.”, Loki follows his brother out of the room.

****************************************************

You go straight to Jane’s rooms, your heart still beating out of your chest, when you get there you knock on her door.

“Come in!”, you hear her say from the other side of the door.

You walk in, “hey. You about ready to go?”. You see her bags all packed already.

She nods, “as ready as I can be. What should I tell your job when I get back?”

“Shit. I forgot about that..”

Jane laughs, “it’s ok, I’ll just tell them you’re a princess now and they can’t afford you anymore.”

“Ha! That’ll work…I’m gonna miss you.”

“Me too. But if you need me I’m only a call from Heimdall away.”

“Ditto.”

“I think Frigga wanted to have breakfast with us first before I go. The maids said they’ll bring my bags to the Bifrost when we’re done.”

You nod, take Jane’s hand in yours and make your way to the dining hall. When you get there it is full of people. Like full full. And when you start walking down the aisle to get to the royal table everyone stands and starts to clap.

You look up to the table with a confused look on your face and see Thor, Frigga and Odin smiling and clapping as well. Loki is making his way down the steps to you and Jane with a smile on his face. He holds his hand out to you and you give it without hesitation. Once he has your hand in his he kisses the back it and then holds both of his arms out. One for you and one for Jane. He walks you both up the steps and holds out your chair for you to sit, as soon as you do Odin holds his hands out to the boisterous crowd.

“Asgard. These last few days have been a trying one. First the Lady y/n was poisoned by one of my own councilmen, his fate will be decided on a later date. And then..my son Loki, went to a realm of fire in order to save her and return the coward who ran to it but was captured and tortured. In exchange for Loki, an antidote and the traitor, Surtr wanted a weapon that Asgard had taken from his realm centuries ago. A weapon that would bring nothing but death and destruction to all of Asgard and the rest of the nine. But because of the bravery of Prince Thor, our honored guard and Lady Y/n, we were able to rescue Prince Loki and reclaim the traitor so he can face proper judgment without having to give up such a dangerous weapon. Lady y/n, I truly believe that without you my son would not be here today. Without you and your selfless decision to consume Idunn’s apple, you saved not only Loki but the rest of the nine. We are indebted to you.”

You’re so taken aback by the praise from Odin that you don’t notice you have been squeezing Loki’s hand throughout the entire speech. And when the entire hall started to clap again you couldn’t fight the blush spreading across your face. Loki sees it and leans over to give you a kiss on your cheek which makes the crowd grow louder. You look over to Loki and the smile on his face makes you blush even more which gets a small laugh out of him.

Odin holds out his hands to quiet everyone again, “today we say farewell to Lady Jane in hopes she will return so we can continue our new growing relationship with Midgard.”

With that, Odin takes his seat and everyone else follows suit and starts to eat their meals. You look over to Loki who has not taken his eyes off of you. “After we take your sister to the Bifrost, I would very much like to continue what we started this morning.”

You smile, “we’ll see how you’re feeling. You already look like you can use another nap.”

“I beg your pardon!..”, he jokes with you, knowing damn well how exhausted he was.

You laugh and start filling his plate, he looks to you in shock and you see everyone else looking at you with smiles on their faces. “What? What did I do?”

Loki huffs a small laugh, “nothing darling, it is a great sign of affection when one fills another’s plate here.”

You blush. “Oh..I..didn’t..umm”

He smiles kindly and gives you another kiss on your cheek, “hush.” He then starts to fill your plate, the smile never leaving his face.

****************************************************

The breakfast goes by so quickly, next thing you know you are at the Heimdall’s observatory. You hug Jane so tightly and she hugs you back just as tight. You’re both crying, but Jane is the one to wipe them away from your face, “you act like we’re never going to see each other again.”

“I’m going to miss you so much.”, you sniffle and bring her back into a hug.

She rubs your back, “I’m gonna miss you too. I’ll be back before you know it. Hey, you should want me to take my time, Darcy is going to be with me when I’m here to visit again.”

You laugh, “take care of yourself.”

“You too. Keep your prince out of trouble.”

“Hey!”, Loki protests from the side.

Thor steps up and you remove yourself from Jane, “are you ready?”, he asks her.

She nods, “yup.” She looks back to you, “I’ll see you soon. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Thor takes Jane’s bags along with her hand and they walk through the Bifrost. As soon as Jane is gone you start to really cry but Loki is there as soon as your knees start to buckle.

“Shh. It will be alright…shh.”, he rubs his hand on the back of your head soothingly.

Your tears subside and your look up to his face, “I think I want to lay down for a bit.”

He nods, “I shall escort you to your rooms.”

You shake your head, “no, I want to be with you…please?”

He smiles, “of course.” He creates a portal to his rooms and you can tell that using his magic took him from slightly tired to exhausted.

You take his hand, “come on, lets lay down for a bit.”

He follows you to the bed and to his surprise, you immediately lay your head on his chest. He smiles and wraps his arms around you and presses a light kiss on your forehead. “It’s going to be alright sweet one.”

“I know. I’m just going to miss her, I’ve never been this far away from my sister before.”

“Don’t think of it as her being far away from you. Look forward to all of the wonderful things you will get to tell her when she returns.”

You look up to his face, “oh yeah? And what wonderful things will I be telling her?”

“I don’t know…your adventures here…the people you meet…how much you have captivated me.”

“Have I?”

“Oh yes. Mind. Body. Soul. You have entranced me.”

You look into his eyes to see if you can detect any lie but you see none, only the truth in his words. So you do the only thing you can think of in that moment. You lift your face up and kiss him. It’s quick and soft but it was like something snapped into place and the next thing you know Loki has moved you so you are on your back and he is kissing you deeply on top of you.

It was a kiss you read about it books, it was full of love, lust, happiness. It was everything and you didn’t want it to end.

When Loki pulls away from you to look at your face you look back at him with a wide smile.

“You’re exhausted.”, you giggle.

He releases a huff, “indeed I am but I want to kiss you more than I want rest.”

You reach up, run your fingers through his hair and bring him back down to you for another sweet kiss. “Let’s gets some sleep and then I promise you can kiss me as much as you want when we wake up.”

He smiles down at you and gives you a quick peck on the lips before he rolls over to his back taking you with him. He places your head back on his chest and just like you did to him, he starts to massage his fingers through your hair. The sensation sending you into a deep sleep.

To be continued….

Tag List:

@mintfrostflower @lotrefcp @mostlymarvelgirl @tekutiger @missingdadneto @rcailleachcola @fire-in-her-veinz @glitterylokislut @yelkmelk @talesofadragon @multifandom-world8 @firedrakegirl @enchanteddreameruniverse @skittslackoffilter @babygirl-panda19 @daydream-believer19 @planets-and-stars @star-maker-rain-dancer

[poppy-metal]

i just saw your ask w angelplummie with daughters bsf art and respectfully i must ask your thoughts on dad’s bsf patrick

hhh gonna kill myself because imagine being arts daughter,,,,, growing up with patrick in your life hes like the fun uncle in your memories, dunking you in the pool, taking you on a ride in his truck, giving you noogies - it isn't long though before your thoughts aren't innocent anymore and he's not an uncle at all to you - he's a man. and you've watched him grow too, art being a teen dad - you remember him when he had no scruff on his chin - you watched him fill out - become more rugged, lose the boyish quality of his 20s and become the man you know today. hes still the same person at his core, impulsive, your fathers polar opposite in every way - fire to his ice.

your relationship shifts when you enter high-school. if only because you experience your first rebel streak. art is a good dad, but hes nervous and tight laced. the thought of you seeing boys or drinking and staying up late getting rowdy,,,,, it'd send him into cardiac arrest.

but you know patrick gets it. he was like you when he was your age, a free spirit. he still was, because thats not something that dies. and maybe that's how you develop feelings for him beyond that of a family friend. when you see a kinship there. a shared soul. you're soulmates, you're sure of it. meant to be. cut from the same cloth.

it happens in tenth grade. its not your first party but its the first time you get reckless. drink too much. things stop being as fun when boys grab at your hips and leer at you, and you feel sick. you want to go home but you know you cant call your dad. it'd break his heart to see you like this. the lecture alone would make pound against your head. you dont want to deal.

so you call patrick zweig. in your phone as 'Ricky 💗' only you were allowed to call him that. special. soulmates. he'll get it. hes been here, you're sure of it. and he wont tell. countless times he was drunk and lied to his parents about it, you bet.

you call him. he comes.

and you were right about the not telling but what you dont expect his quiet anger. you can feel it in the stillness of the car. when he pulls up to pick you up and his jaw is tight and hes tapping on the steering wheel. you think if you were more sober you'd care more about pissing him off. all you can think about is how pretty he looks in the moonlight.

"thank youuuu." you slur to him when you tumble in.

patrick flicks a look at you you're too drunk to decipher - he was smoking with his elbow propped outside the window while he waited for you. he flicks the ash out the window and turns the ignition on. "put your seatbelt on."

woah. thats gonna be a new fantasy, you think. that authoritative tone. you fumble with the belt, but your fingers look fuzzy and keep missing the hole. "no clicky." you complain.

patrick huffs and then he's leaning over his center console - his arm reaching over your body. it happens in slow motion in your head. you look down at his arm stretched out across your waist, notice the veins in his arms, the dusting of hair. thicker than when he was younger. filled out. your lips part.

he tugs the seatbelt from your fingers and clicks it into place. tugs the belt securely over your chest and his knuckles brush over your chest for the briefest moment. you inhale. exhale.

he pulls back. starts to pull out of the driveway. you say, "thank you." a full minute later, your voice small and soft.

he doesn't look your way. thats okay. you can watch his hands on the steering wheel all you want this way. the smooth glide of his palm over the wheel when he makes a turn. the idle rub of his thumb over it when hes going steady.

"how wasted are you?" he asks eventually.

you take a moment to think. try to count the alphabet backwards... yeah, no.

"pretty wstd..." you mumble. then you giggle. "wasted." you sound out the word.

patrick breathes deeply like he's purposely staying calm. "jesus." he looks at you again, a quick up and down assessment. "art cant see you like this. he'll lose his shit."

"he'll..." you hiccup. "he'll ground me foreverrrrrrr."

"your ass should be grounded." patrick snaps. "i mean, what the hell?" he says your name all disappointed and it shouldn't make you feel things but it does.

"you were doin worse at my age." you tell him.

at this, he finally laughs. more of a chuckle. a huff of amusement. his lips twist wryly. "kid, what i was doing at your age would make -" he pauses, thinks better of whatever he was about to say. "- lets just say nobody should be doing what I was doing at that age." he looks at you, "fucking especially not you."

your lips purse. "maybe i wanna be like you."

he shakes his head. "no, hun - you dont. trust me -" he grins but there's a kind of.... morose? tone to his voice. wistful almost. "you don't wanna be like me."

you frown, lips tugging down. you twist in your seat as much as your seatbelt will allow. his side profile really is something. you see hair at the nape of his neck is slightly damp - curling at the ends. he must have been taking a shower when you called - or quickly took one before he came to get you -

"i think i already am like you." you tell him honestly. the alcohol loosens your tongue. makes you more bold than you would be normally. "like, right here." you thump a hand against your chest. "on the inside." your teeth dig into your bottom lip. "i feel it. that.... thing we have."

"its called stupidity."

you shake your head. hard enough to make your brain feel knocked around.

"no, dont... dont diminish it. its not that - its like. you wanna be free - like... you were born a wolf but raised as a sheep. and you just wanna get out - run into the forest and be wild. you have that. i can see it. you try to push it down, but i see it. i see you, ricky. and i think you're cool as fuck. dont let -" you swallow. "- dont let anyone make you feel.... like you have to - have to - conform. i like who you are."

its quiet after that. patrick doesn't say anything. you watch your words run through him. see his adams apple bob. his lips work from one side to the other. hes chewing on it, you think. on what you said.

eventually he looks at you. his eyes are dark from it being night outside, but you can still see their green. his fingers tighten around the steering wheel.

"you're drunk as fuck."

but he says it like his voice is ran through gravel. rough and soft. you think what he really means is, thank you. i see you too.

you fall back against your seat and nod. you're getting sleepy.

"yeah." you agree. "i am that."

you hear him sigh. "I'll take you back to mine - tell your dad you got caught in a storm and couldn't make it all the way to his." his voice does that authoritative thing again, "but dont make this a habit, im too old for this shit."

"what're you gonna do? spank me if i misbehave again?"

he says your name in warning. once. clipped and short. so serious.

"I'll try." you tell him. "but no promises."

"you're gonna give me gray hairs."

"tuck me in when we get to yours?"

"dont fucking push it."

[bruhnze]

I hope i didn’t crush you

Summary: Ona says Lucy is not tall, Lucy didn't like that. Ona finds out there is more to Lucy's insecurity. (Idk actually, but something like that)

Warning: Mature content, sexual content

Please note that this is pure fiction!

Word count: 3522

Since the poll showed everyone likes these stories, i wrote another, idk how these other girlies do it cause i actually feel filthy after writing this, but ok, i like reading them too, i'll admit it, and with the lack of new ones i took it uppon myself to contribute, this is for all my Luna shippers!

I hope i didn’t crush you - Lucy y Ona

It was late in the afternoon, they had just gotten home from a busy day with morning training, treatment, then lunch with the team, in the afternoon they had done some media stuff, the team had to record videos for different companys and deals. After that they also had an meeting with the staff and Jonatan.

Now they were finally back home for siesta time.

‘’Pfft, that was tireing’’ Ona sighed as she flopped onto the couch.

‘’I know’’ Lucy said ‘But you also had some fun right’’.

‘’Yeah i had fun, you too it seemed, what are Lucia and you up too anyways?’’

Lucy laughed ‘’Corrales? .. Oh nothing, i think she is just like me when i was young, i’m trying to teach her some lessons, but today it was just banter really, she is jokes’’

‘’I love how you always involve everyone and make everyone feel at ease’’ Ona smiled ‘’But i haven’t seen you all day’’

Lucy now stopped with the thing she was doing, cleaning up some lost dog toys and putting them in the dog toy bin, and walked to the couch sitting next to Ona who was laying down with her head on a few pillows.

Ona smiled ‘’Hola bebé’’

‘’Puedo besarte?’’ (Can i kiss you?) Lucy said as she came closer.

‘’Mhm, siempre, especialmente si hablas español’’ (Mhm, always, especially when you talk to me in spanish) Ona sighed.

‘’Te gusta cuando te hablo en español?’’ (Do you like it when I speak Spanish to you?) Lucy leaned in to kiss Ona.

Ona grabbed Lucy by her shirt and tried to get Lucy on top of her. Lucy noticed and positioned herself lying between Ona's legs, holding herself up on her hands, still not breaking their kiss.

Lucy licked Ona’s lower lip en pulled it between her teeth, then she gave a few quick kisses on her mouth and went to Ona’s neck, kissing it softly.

Ona closed her eyes from the sensation and groaned while strangeling Lucy with her legs trying to get them closer to eachother.  ‘’Sometimes i feel like i can’t get close enough to you’’ Ona said ‘’I hate that we have to be in public so much, wish we could just stay in the house for a few days, i want to cuddle with you for hours’’

Lucy, who had now stopped with the neck kisses, held her face a bit away so she could look at Ona. ‘’aw baby, i wish that we could, i love cuddling with you also’’.

Lucy lowered herself and now completely laid on top of Ona, nudging her face in Ona’s neck.

They were laying there cuddled up for a while when Lucy started snoring softly, Ona had put her hands under Lucy’s shirt, scratching Lucy’s muscular back.

Ona took her right hand away from Lucys back and scratched Lucys neck now, at the part where her hair starts, below her bun.

Ona loved sleepy Lucy, with her being the supposed tougher more dominant person in the relationship, it was cute when Ona could cuddle Lucy for a change like the occasional moment when she was allowed to be the big spoon. And just like this moment now, where Lucy is completely relaxed and Ona got to play with her hair.

After some time Lucy seemed to wake up, groaning lightly against Ona’s skin.

‘’Good sleep?’’ Ona asked.

‘’Mhm’’ Lucy got a bit more awake, ‘oh, i hope i didn’t crush you’’ pushing herself up.

‘’no, stay’’ Ona hugging her legs tighter around Lucy ‘’you can’t crush me, i’m very sturdy and you’re basically the same size as me anyways’’.

Now Lucy was fully and wide awake. ‘’Pardon’’

‘huh’ Ona said innocently.

‘’Oh i thought i heard a pretty little lady say something completely ridiculous’’ Lucy said, now getting up.

Ona laughed ‘’6 cm is not very much Lucy’’

‘’Oh yeah, for double that i’ve gotten you moaning like there was no tomorrow though’’ Lucy scoffed.

Ona blushed ‘’Luce, im just joking’’ Ona sat up and squeezed Lucy’s bicep. ‘’But i like the sound of that’’.

‘’Yeah i bet you do, don’t know if you deserve it now, do you?’’ Lucy said in a teasing voice.

Ona now got behind Lucy who was sitting on the edge of the sofa and massaged her shoulders, and wispered in Lucy’s ear ‘’My tall strong muscular and beatifull girlfriend doesn’t want to have her way with me?’’

Lucy whimpered. She took Ona’s hands a pulled them infront of her, so Ona’s arms were now around her and Ona put her legs around Lucy instinctively. Lucy stood up easily and walked them too the bedroom.

At the bed she dropped Ona on from her back onto the bed, resulting in a laugh from Ona.

‘’Do you think this is funny?’’ Lucy scoffed

‘’Ah Luce, you’re too easily offended’’ Ona laughed.

‘’Oh yeah, lets see how long you can continue your jokes’’ -Lucy

Lucy pulled her shirt off and got on the ground to do some push-ups, then she did some sit-ups.

Ona stared at the women, what the actual fuck, she thought by herself, what is she doing.

After a few more exercises there were beads of sweat on Lucy’s back.

Ona was enjoying the sight from her place, now sitting up on the bed.

Lucy walked over to the other side of the room, getting up the spin bike, which had actually become more of a decor lately rather than Lucy used it, like she frequently did last year to get some extra cardio in.

Lucy was pedalling fast now, breathing heavy, sweat on her forehead.

Ona had no clue what Lucy was trying to do but she did know that the view of Lucy’s abs was something she didn’t mind at all, she actually got turned on by it. And with the sweat and grunting it was an erotic sight really.

Ona shifted and now sat with her back against the headboard of the bed. Eyes staying on Lucy.

Lucy was sitting in her shorts and sportsbra on the bike, after 15 minutes she thought it was enough and walked to the bathroom, she walked in and left the door completely open, knowing Ona could see into the bathroom from the place she was sitting on the bed.

Lucy discarded of her clothes and leisurely threw them into the laundry basket. She took her time, now naked, to walk back in to the room to grab a towel from the closet, knowing full well there were still some in the cabinet in the bathroom.

She felt Ona’s eyes following her every move but she didn’t budge.

Walking back to the shower she glanced over at the bed, she didn’t know if she was seeing it right, so she stood still and took a good look.

Ona got red, removing her hand from her pants.

‘’No, go on then’’ Lucy said ‘’I don’t want to disturb you’’

‘’Luce’’ Ona said with a husk voice ‘’I need you-‘’

‘’Nah, it seems you have everything under control baby, you don’t need me’’ Lucy said, now getting closer to the bed.

‘’I want you’’ Ona tried again.

Lucy laughed ‘’Yeah, but naughty girls don’t get what they want, do they’’

‘’no’’ Ona admitted ‘’I wanna be a good girl for you Lucy’’

Lucy smiled on the inside, and was satisfied with the state Ona was in now. ‘’undress’’ she said calmly.

Ona quickly did so and sat back again, looking at Lucy with doe eyes, waiting for the next order.

Lucy looked at Ona’s body, she was really beautifull, the freckles, which she had all kissed one by one, the muscles, the veins. Ona was sculpted by the gods, her face was so pretty that even on a bad day Ona looked flawless in every picture that was taken of her.

Lucy’s eyes scanning her body made Ona weak, the lust and also love that she saw in Lucy’s eyes made her wanting Lucy close, she needed Lucy’s touch.

Lucy gathered her thoughts and focussed back on what she was doing. She was still stood next too the bed, naked.

She walked to the empty side of the bed and laid down, prompting her pillow up a bit and putting her hands behind her head, she spoke again ‘’Lets see what that pretty little mouth of you can do then, besides spouting nonsense’’.

Ona got up, this was not a punishment for her, she loved tasting Lucy. She got inbetween Lucy’s legs and kissed the insides of her tighs before slowely working her way to Lucy’s centre.

Lucy looked down at Ona’s head between her legs, seeing Ona’s butt stick up in the air behind it. ‘Damn’ Lucy mumbled.

Ona heard it but didn’t look up, she was orderd to make use of her mouth, so she was gonna do just that.

Licking and sucking Lucy’s sex she felt the woman getting closer, she now entered Lucy with her tongue, resulting her nose to rub against Lucy’s clit.  

Lucy groaned. A bit more stimulance from Ona caused her to climax. She rested her head back on the pillow while Ona lapped a few more times at her folds.

Ona kissed Lucy’s thighs and sat up, now waiting for a next command.

‘’Think i’m going for a shower’’ Lucy spoke up.

Ona looked at her with disbelieve, she put her hands on Lucy’s legs. ‘’No’’.

‘’No what?’’ Lucy smirked ‘’Seemed like you had things covered earlier, i’ll just let you to it’’.

‘’Lucy’’ Ona sounded desperate now ‘’i-

‘’Okay then’’ Lucy said and got up ‘’I’ll help you out, maybe i can fuck some sense into you’’.

Ona nodded, happy she was gonna get something but unsure about what Lucy meant by that. Looking at Lucy going trough their drawer.

Lucy turned back to her now wearing a strapon, Ona got even more wet from the sight, she laid back and parted her legs.

‘’No’’ said Lucy ‘’turn around, get up’’ while lathering up the plastic cock with lube.

Ona did what Lucy said, and got on her hands and knees, with her back turned to Lucy.

Lucy ran her fingers through ona’s folds. ‘’Yeah that’s what i thought’’ she grunted ‘’You’re so wet for me, you love this shit’’.

Ona whimpered and shuffled a bit more towards Lucy, now feeling the strap against her.

Lucy didn’t waste a second and pushed inside, earning a moan from Ona. She put it in completely, her hips now connected with Ona’s butt.

Lucy first thrusted slowely and then graduadly worked to a good rhythm, she slapped Ona’s perfect looking butt, earning another loud moan. She grabbed Ona rough and held her steady whilst fucking her, filthy sounds filling the room.

Ona felt really good but she needed more, she wanted Lucy to reach around and circle her clit for her, but in this mood Lucy would probably not do that for her. She reached down herself.

Lucy noticed and grabbed her wrist, pulling it behind her back, Ona nearly lost her balance, now resting on only one arm.

‘’what do you think you’re doing’’ Lucy said into Ona’s ear, she kissed down Ona’s back and slowly stopped thrusting, then she pulled out. ‘’Do you want to do it yourself again’’ she flopped onto the bed and sat against the headboard.

Ona looked at her trying to get what she should do next.

Lucy patted her lap. ‘’Come on, show me how good you can make yourself get off then’’

Ona smirked and climed up on Lucy, lowering herself on to the strap. She moaned, throwing her head back and closed her eyes.

‘’Look me in my eyes bub’’ Lucy said.

Ona listened and couldn’t help but hear a desperate tone in Lucy’s voice. Was she as riled up as her right now?, Ona asked herself.

Ona was now riding Lucy, holding herself up with her hands on the headboard, Lucy´s had put her hands on Ona´s hips lightly, not helping her, just resting there.

Lucy was loving this view, a moaning Ona grinding on her lap, she saw Ona getting closer ´´touch yourself baby´´

With her right hand Ona reached down to provide just the last bit that pushed her over the edge.

She hid her face in Lucy´s neck and called out ´´Luce´´

Now Lucy held Ona´s hips more firmly, helping her ride her through her high slowly.

´´ Quiero que me folles ahora Ona´´ (I want you to fuck me now Ona) Lucy wispered shyly.

Ona was brought back to reality immediately by those words. This was not usual at all, the strapon was only worn by Lucy until now.

‘’If you would want to do that too ofcourse’’ Lucy added even more quietly then her last words.

Ona crawelled of Lucy and nodded eagerly, ‘’ofcourse Luce, i just didn’t know that was something you were interested in’’

‘’I just hadn’t thought about it really’’ Lucy said ‘’But a few days ago i had a dream about you, where we did that and ever since then i can’t get it out of my head’’.

Ona was now grinning wide ‘’You dream about me huh?’’

Lucy blushed and playfully pushed Ona ‘’Yes sometimes’’ ‘’But it’s your own fault, you’re just too hot’’.

‘’Bueno’’ Ona said, walking to the drawer ‘’maybe we should use this one first then’’ holding up their smallest piece of the collection.

‘’mhm’’ Lucy nodded ‘’have you done this before?’’

‘’Yeah i have, but it was a long time ago so we’ll just go really slow for the both of us’’  ‘’Have you done this before?’’ Ona asked.

Lucy looked away, getting even more embarrassed ‘’No not like this, but.. penetration in general… yes…’’  

Ona laughed, ‘’I know’’ she waved her fingers demonstratively.

Lucy now laughed aswell ‘yeah but i mean with a toy, but that was really long ago and it happend like 3 times’’.

Ona got closer to Lucy, taking of the harness from Lucy, Lucy lifting her butt from the bed. Ona asked Lucy ‘’Why? Didn’t you like it?’’

Lucy anwsered without looking at Ona, ‘’yeah i kinda did, but i felt a bit vulnerable and the person i was with didn’t help with that, so i never tried anymore really’’.

Ona now cupped Lucy’s chin. ‘’I’m sorry baby’’ and kissed Lucy. ‘’We can just have the same rules that we use for me’’.

Because Ona liked it a bith more rough in the bedroom, the couple had spoken about their boundries extensively. For Lucy it had took some getting used to before she fully owned the dominant role with saying the sometimes even degrading comments that really got Ona going.

But in this stage of their relationship they were having a very good dynamic in the bedroom, she had become more confident and all Ona's needs were met, Lucy’s too, but recently these thoughts had started to arise, and only because she felt so comfortable with Ona, Lucy had dared to bring it up.

‘’Yeah’’ Lucy smiled ‘’That is good’’

Ona was putting on the harness and walked to the bathroom were she threw the attached dildo in the sink and now put the smaller one in the harness.

Lucy was watching her every move, feeling nervous but also turned on.

Ona walked back to the bed and asked Lucy ‘’have you thought about how you-

‘’Come here’’ Lucy said streching her hands to Ona. Ona climed up on the bed and kneeled inbetween Lucy’s legs, she reached over Lucy to the nightstand and got the bottle of lube and put some on the rubber dick.

Lucy watched her and parted her legs slightly more.

Ona turned to face Lucy and carefully studied her face, she saw expectation but also a little bit of hesitancy. She kissed Lucy softly and wispered, ‘’Just talk to me baby, if you want to stop, we stop’’

‘’Mhm’’ Lucy nodded ‘’thank you Ona’’ and kissed her back.

Ona guided the strap with her hand between Lucy’s folds, she rubbed a few times up and down. Still looking a Lucy, Lucy gave a small nod. And then Ona slowly put the head in, watching Lucy’s reaction.

Lucy whimpered and closed her eyes.

Ona slowely put it in completely, she lowered herself more to Lucy and started thrusting slowly, her breast now brushing against Lucy with every thrust.

Ona couldn’t say that she hadn’t thought about this happening, but she didn't want to get carried away on this first time, especially not after what Lucy had just told her, so she steadily kept to a nice pace and focussed on making Lucy feel good.

Lucy was moaning now, she’d opened up her legs a bit more so Ona could get closer to her and tried to reach Ona’s hips to pull her closer.

Ona kissed Lucy’s neck, wispering ‘’Do you want try and ride me now?’’

Lucy groaned ‘’mmh’’

Ona smiled softly ‘okay i am gonna pull out now’’

Lucy whimpered at the loss, and got up on her knees. Ona sat in the middele of the bed with her back against the headboard, Lucy already climbing on top of her. She held Lucy’s hips while Lucy guided herself onto the strap again.

Lucy was now in control of the pace herself, going a bit faster she hid her face in Ona’s neck.

Ona reached one of her hand between their bodies and started stimulating Lucy´s clit giving pressure so Lucy was grinding against her thumb.

Lucy was now panting heavily and her rhythm became even faster, Ona could tell she was getting close ´´You´re doing so good Lucia, come for me buba´´

With this praise Lucy got pushed over the edge, with a few more up and downs and she came hard. She cried out a moan in Ona´s neck, after a few seconds she got off the the strap and sat on one of Ona thighs, placing her head in the nook of Ona´s neck again.

Ona positioned them so they were more laying down now, rather than sitting up like before. She started tracing Lucy´s back with her nails lightly and with one hand she went back to the hairs in Lucy´s neck, like she had done earlier this afternoon.

They layed there for a few minutes when Ona felt Lucy kissing her neck.

´’Did- ‘’Tha-

They spoke at the same time and chuckeled.

‘’You talk baby’’ Ona said.

‘’No, you, what did you want to say’’ -Lucy

‘’I wanted to ask, Did you like it, Did it feel good?’’

She felt Lucy smile against her skin ‘’yeah, it felt really good’’

Ona smiled, ‘’ i’m glad Luce, now what did you want to say?’’

‘’Ah nevermind, it was nothing’’ Lucy kissed Ona’s neck and pushed herself up a bit to face Ona ‘’i love you’’.

Ona’s face became soft ‘’Luce, i hope you feel that you can say anything to me’’. Only now she noticed Lucy’s watery eyes. ‘’heyyy baby, what’s up’’ pulling Lucy’s head to her chest ‘’tell me, you don’t have to look at me while telling’’.

Lucy sniffed her nose, ‘’No, it is positive Ona’’ ‘’initialy i wanted to say thank you, but that is maybe a bit weird, but what i mean by it is thanks for making me feel so safe, i felt as though i could let go completely, honestly i have never experienced a orgasm like this one, it was such a different feeling, very nice’’.

Ona caressed Lucy’s head, ‘’i’m glad baby, maybe we can do it more often like this?’’

Lucy looked at Ona, wanting to read her face, ‘’Did you like it aswell?’’

Ona grinned ‘’yes, very much, it was even hotter than i had imagined’’

‘’Did you imagine this?’’ Lucy questioned

Ona spoke softly, ‘’Yeah i did, i mean i love being on the receiving end, but there is something about using the strap on someone else, it’s hot, but i had just assumed you weren’t up for it, we should’ve talked about it, because i had liked to know that you had these bad experiences before Luce, then we could’ve talked about that’’

‘’Not just this’’ Ona said while pointing between her legs ‘’but also other things, trust is very important in the bedroom’’. ‘’I hate that you didn’t always have that’’

Lucy grabbed Ona’s hand and laced their fingers. ‘’I love you’’ she said once more.

‘’Do you want to tell me about it’’ Ona asked

Lucy smiled softly ‘’I actually discussed it with my therapist also, so you don’t have to worry that i was bottling it up, what do want to know, or should i just tell you the whole story’’

‘’Yeah tell me everything’’ Ona pressed a kiss on Lucy’s head that was laying on her chest ‘’tell me it all love’’.

‘’Okay but the subject contains information about exes and i don’t want you to spite them.. , so maybe i’ll leave out the names?’’ -Lucy

‘’Why, i wont do anything, i don’t even know your exes, only one’’ Ona questioned,

‘’Yeah’’ Lucy sighed, ‘’That’s true, okay i’ll start from the beginning….

[rafecameroninterlude]

hi angel! i love your work so much and fell in love with bambi!reader, so i was hoping you could write something for me ^_^

can you pls pls pls write bambi!reader comforting rafe after he gets into it with ward? i feel like she’d know exactly how to comfort himmm (pure fluff pls, i read too much smut lmaooo)

warnings: ward cameron, arguing, shouting, a little bit of physical violence, poor rafe who deserves so much better, mention of murder (i’m not referencing peterkin), fluff, soft petting, words of affirmation

a/n: aww bambi!reader has been getting so much love, it makes my heart happy to know that you enjoy the works that she’s in <3

“you had one job, rafe.. one!” ward had been shouting at rafe for nearly an hour already, his face flush with anger. “you really have a way of fucking things up, huh? i should put a caution sign on your forehead.” rafe’s fist clenched as he listened to his father, trying his best to ignore the sinking feeling in his chest with every word that ward spat.

“i already told you that i couldn’t close out the business accounts and wire the money to a different one. apparently i’m not next in line to own cameron development anymore. ‘you know something about that?” rafe was in disbelief when he had to find out from a service representative that his own father took him off of the family business, something that he worked hard all these years for in order to prove he was worthy of running.

ward froze. he had forgotten about that. “were you ever gonna tell me, or were you just gonna be a coward about it?” rafe stood up, towering over his father with that crazy look in his eyes. “what you forgot to do before you faked your own death instead of facing your problems like a man, was take my name off of the inheritance of tanneyhill.” he laughed, “i own this shit now.” rafe stepped closer, backing ward into the wall. “get out of my house.” ward was seething, his hand coming up to fist rafe’s shirt.

“your house? i’m the one who worked like a dog to get us here.” ward said through gritted teeth, shoving rafe in his chest. rafe stumbled, scoffing out a laugh as he then pushed his father. “worked like a dog to get us here but you were more than willing to leave me here while you start a new life in fuckin’ guatemala.” rafe fought to keep his emotions at bay.

“leave. and don’t ever come back.” ward’s chest was rising and falling, both him and rafe glaring at one another. “you’re cut off. good luck keeping up with this place on your own.” ward smiled bitterly. “cut off?” rafe narrowed his eyes, “i’ve been cut off, dad. i haven’t used a cent of yours since i was nineteen. all this time i’ve been making money my own way, and a lot of it too. ‘seems like your old man brain forgot about that.” rafe nudged ward as he walked past, his father following him out of the master bedroom.

“i’m leaving. when i come back i want you out of here,” rafe grabbed his truck keys, his skin on fire as he looked up the staircase, “and by the way, asshole, i’m not by myself. i got the prettiest girl on the island on my arm everywhere i go.” ward watched as his son walked out the front door. rafe was seeing red the whole time he drove to your house, cursing under his breath as he recalled his father’s words.

“the fucking nerve that guy has.” he punched the steering wheel, nostrils flaring as tears pricked at his eyes. he was the only one who was there to take care of things when ward was ‘gone’. even going as far as committing crimes so his father wouldn’t face any kind of scrutiny. yet, there he was telling him that he was a fuck up.

rafe spent the next five minutes mumbling to himself, his hands shaking as he parked outside your driveway. you were curled up on the porch swing, an open book in your lap when he walked up the stone path. all it took was one look at your boyfriend to have you scrambling up from your seat, eager to soothe him in any way you can. “oh, ray, what’s wrong?” you guided him inside, locking the door shut before both of you made your way up to your room.

“it’s ward. he came back just to tell me shit about not closing the bank accounts under cameron development.” you knew all about rafe’s conflict with his father. from the way he favored everyone else over his eldest, to the constant nagging and insults. sitting rafe down on the edge of your bed, you couldn’t help the way your heart sunk at the sight of defeat in his shoulders, his eyes void of any emotion.

slipping his shoes off, you took your usual seat in his lap, stroking the outline of his jaw as he vented. “i’ll never be good enough for him. i killed for him goddamit, and what do i get in return? ‘i should put a caution sign on your forehead.’ rafe imitated ward’s voice from earlier. you blinked, pecking his cheek. “you’re an amazing son, rafe. shame on him for not recognizing that.” rafe stared up at you, his heart beating wildly in his chest.

you were the only one that looked at him with pure adoration, the only one who made him feel like he had a purpose. “i think you’re amazing, rafe. you don’t sit around, waiting to get things done, you’re so helpful, and so, so kind— to me.” he chuckled at the clarification, rubbing a large hand over your knee. “you think so?” he leaned his head against your chest, your arms coming up to hold him. “i know so.” you sighed, breathing in his scent.

“wanna be little spoon tonight?” your voice alone made him relax, his eyes fluttering shut.

“..yeah.”

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

The Man 11

Warnings: non/dubcon, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Character: mob!Lloyd Hansen

Summary: a demanding customer complicates more than your work life.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging ❤️

You half smile and half cringe. Oh boy. He wants you to do that. With him there. Well, you never really did it with an audience. You’re more of a loner when it comes to... cumming. 

You let out a brittle chuckle, “sir, that’s... you know, I think I’m pretty good. I got lots of action today--” 

“I’m not asking,” his voice is dusky and makes your chest thump. Wow. Okay, you can see for a split second how he might be attractive. If you just photoshop the caterpillar off his lip with your mind Adobe. 

“I understand but what if I just focused on you, sir. You seem to enjoy that--” 

“Don’t make me repeat myself. It’s getting old. Fast.” 

“Sure, that’s fair, I hate a broken record,” you gulp and look down then back up, squinting as you smile with a strain in your cheeks. “So, like down here or... it’s a bit tight...” you sheepishly show your teeth then laugh for real as the joke bubbles in your mind. You can’t help but let it free, “that’s what she said.” 

He blinks and looks at the ceiling then down again. He sits back in his chair, legs wide, hands on his thighs. 

“Get on the desk,” he orders. 

You inhale and steel yourself. This is a lot. You think you’ve been handling things well. One thing in particular but you don’t know how much more you can take. Today has been intense. What time is it? 

You move forward, once more face to face with his crotch before you manage to plant a foot and stand. His eyes flick down and he hums. You turn slowly and try to see the corner of his screen. Holy, it’s not even three o’clock. 

“What the hell are you looking at?” He snarls. 

“Nothing, sir, promise--” 

“Turn it off.” 

You should say the same thing about his dick. You keep your mouth closed and press the button to black the monitor. You put your hands on the desk and carefully slide his delicate keyboard and mouse aside. They’re so light you nearly toss them. You shake your head. 

“What?” He sneers. 

“It’s just, sir, Apple products are made to break. This keyboard feels like a wafer.” 

“This isn’t what we’re doing right now. Focus.” 

“I’m focused,” you whine and consider the desk. This glass better be sturdy. 

You lift one knee, then the other. You don’t like this. It's like crossing ice; tenuous and just as cold. He clicks his tongue. 

“You know, you don’t got a bad ass considering,” he mutters. 

You should thank him. It’s a real compliment. All those squats you do when the shop slows down are paying off. You’re too frazzled to do much more than turn over and sit facing him. As hot as this might seem in his head, the logistics are not easy. Or safe. 

You glance around and frown, “sir, what if I break--” 

“You keep talking, and I’ll break something on you,” he swivels the chair slightly as his hand crawls up his pantleg. 

“Got it, okay, so...” you bend your legs, putting your feet on the glass and wiggles your toes.  

You slowly pull your thighs apart. You tremble as the cool air slips between them and grazes your cunt. Your ears are burning and your skull is pounding. You’re dizzy. This desk is really high up. You could fall and crack your head open. 

“Take your fucking time,” he growls. 

“Sir, I got a bit of stage fright here,” you squeak, “I never really... you know, in front of someone.” 

“No use being shy when you had me down your throat twice today,” he reprimands. 

“Fair,” you tilts your head, “that’s a good point.” You look down at your body and reach down between your legs. You blow out between your lips, almost whistling as some of the tension seeps out. “That’s helpful advice, actually.” 

He sighs and you seal your lips. You nod and close your eyes. You can do this. How many times have you done this? Well, maybe you shouldn’t be proud of that.  

You feel down your tummy and along your pelvis. Goosebumps rise and you shiver, leaning back on your other hands as your feet arch against the edge of the desk. You feel along your coily hair and delve between your tender folds. You’re wet but that’s better than the alternative. You’d rather this not last forever. 

You press down on your clit and take a deep breath. You let it out slow as you trace the sensitive bud and hum. Alright, gotta get the rhythm. You’re thinking too much. Stop that. 

Wait, no. You need to think. You need to picture something. This is too much pressure. Knowing he’s watching you, you have to think of anything else. Of someone. Someone sexy. You gotta get the motor going. 

You ease back onto your elbow as the heat begins to flow. You picture this burly guy you saw down at the sandwich shop. You don’t quite have the clear picture of him but he was tall and thick and he had some nice eyes. He also looks pretty grumpy but he could probably channel that energy into some good hip action. 

Okay, back to the point. You put together the fantasy; thick arms, hairy chest, throaty grunts, and a big... yeah. That’s it. Your fingers swirl faster, slippery as your excitement builds. You moan and tilt your head back. You’re almost there. 

You flick your fingers up and down, your thighs quivering. You gotta give this guy a name. Something sexy. Gene? No, ew, that’s not it. Hm. Oh, yes, Adam? The first man. The epitome of maleness. 

You squeak as your breath hitches and your lashes flutter. Your toes curl and you put your head forward as the tension winds tight and all at once, unleashes. You quake and drone out madly, head lolling as you fight to keep your fingers moving. You feel your orgasm flowing from you, wetting your cunt and the creases of your thighs. Fuck... 

Suddenly, your land on your back. The glass braces and you wait for a crack. Lloyd pins you by your neck. He swats your hand away from your cunt and frames your entrance with two long fingers. He drags them up, rubbing your buzzing clit as you squirm. 

“Oh, Adam,” you burst out and your eyes snap open in horror. You didn’t mean to let that out. 

“Adam?” He growls as he stops, squeezing your throat tighter, “who the fuck is Adam?” 

You touch his wrist, “I meant... Floyd?” 

[the-moon-files]

Wait, quick idea! Twilight looks like the only hylian in his village because everyone else has round ears, so what if he wasn’t as surprised as the others to see their human companion so resilient, but still fairly impressed because of the fact that most if not all people in his village don’t put themselves in as drastic situations as the reader? Or is this just humans from our world?

get out of my head lmao /lh - you, me, and wayfayrr are actually the same person on diff accounts LMAO

im of the belief that (blame @wayfayrr, my beloved) that he knows of humans bc of some in his village but yeah, just not the type of human in drastic situations

(ALSO they wrote me a fun, long, glorious, male reader human space orc au fic for winning their raffle a bit ago, and it brings up their headcanon abt this and i Adore It actually, check it out here pls if u wanna know🤲)

(also if u see this wayfayrr, sorry for the ping, also should i be calling u moss? or wayfayrr?? idk which, i hope thats even ok to ask 😭 i assumed u would call my ass Moon)

Moon: Male-Masc Reader (he/him)

Orbit: short headcanons-ish, rambling mostly

Stars: Twilight Princess Link (Twi/Twilight), mentions of other Links

Comets & Meteors: CWs: none known, & TWs: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

to reiterate what i said up there, in case u skipped it for the bullet points,

i like the headcanon he knows humans, knows some of their quirks, and how they were the first ppl the other hylian villagers called on to help stuck cows or downed wagons, lots of heavy lifting stuff

but he really hasnt seen the extent of real humans, bc the humans who were in Ordon, well, they lived in hylian society,

why would they need the adrenaline to lift a car when hylians have set up whole tools and systems in all their towns to help lift just a full bucket of water out of the well??

not to mention, i think all the humans in his village were older adults? like at least not the age theyd be doing things like parkour or going to any trampoline parks type of age,

id imagine its more like stories talked about amongst hylians how hard humans can go, and even the humans themselves talked abt things like,

“well compared to u hylians, we have stomachs made of molten lava to you guys really, but we never have to use it, bc u know hylian food works just fine”

when Twi asked they would say stuff like that, but as soon as he saw ur human ass just picking wildflowers and berries off the side of the road to snack on? even random grasses/vines at some point (kudzu)?? easily eating Wild’s Dubious Food that's DEFINITELY got monster parts in it???! gnawing on the bone of a cucco and it just breaks??!!! and you look surprised too, thank fuck finally a normal reaction from u- oh my goddesses u were just curious (damn the elders were right abt human curiosity too) **and are now sucking out the marrow and eating the bone-!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twilight’s perspective of you is actually the equivalent of like, reading stories about vampires all ur life, then this new friend you made starts to get allergic to garlic, crave blood, has crazy strength and advanced senses, etc

and he’s just watching those honest-to-Hylia human mythological feats play out in real time in front of him, like he’s the only self-aware character in the story that immediately clocks the really obvious vampire as a vampire lmao

is the first to either 1. start choking on his laugh as he theoretically knows ur about to jump on the back of a lynel/hinox to ride it around and watch as the others come to the same conclusion OR 2. try to Stop you from jumping on said big monster in an attempt to ride it around bc he gets used to ur human BS quicker than the others and can see it coming a mile away now lol

very much so this meme:

(ur welcome i made it myself <3)

anyway id love to rant abt this dynamic

abt both Twi’s shock at you eating peppers like a god has come down from the sky to prove their immortality,

but also poor rancher esstientally humansitting you too lmao

the Chain/Time/Wars absolutely put him down as the resident human expert like: “ok he just drank like, 5? No- Four stop him from drinking more at least- (dual sighs). okay, 6 stamina potions, will that kill him??”

Twilight, saviour of Hyrule, of the Twili, Link from Twilight Princess himself,

has to keep a record book of all the new shit he’s heard/learned about humans in Ordon, what he has actively learned abt ur ass just fucking around and finding out, and the few bread crumbs of information u give him abt ur species

(that rlly just come off as kind of cryptid statements abt u/humanity, or don't apply in this scenario bc ur only comparison is Earth Rules, which honestly scare every single fucking one of them in the same way as walking on Ganon’s lawn or something, like straight up view ur home planet as enemy territory, the Amazon jungle, the Hyrule wilds if you will-)

Twilight also gets involuntarily volunteered for human-sitting duty too

tbh the only person Not allowed on human-sitting duty, when u guys go new areas esp, is Wild/Hyrule

you’d tell him you wanna get inside the guardian robot to operate it and ride it around and he’d probably be in shock you even fathomed something like that, yet also now EXTREMELY intrigued to watch it play out

(they’re both more of a “u wanna jump off a cliff?? that's actually crazy, wait for me please.” he seems to think he can somehow protect you if he joins you? its worked sometimes to be fair to him ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯ just not really conveniently when the rest of the Chain are around lmao)

☆

i live btw, ive been writing/updating fics along with life updates (moving states/new job/online class) so a few asks will hopefully be answered over here in the next 2ish weeks

no promises, my life is kinda girlbossing at the moment too close to the sun and i am Nervous abt disappointing u guys

i already feel like im disappointing my other blog bc i haven't posted in forever bc im writing a fic instead of asks during any free time i dedicate to writing for it so :/

pls excuse my super slowness like a package ur waiting for in the mail or smth type of slow

AGAIN thanks for the ask!! i hope this was at least entertaining to read as some addon to what u said, you guys have gotta check out some of wayfayrr’s stuff if ur into this, bc they're the only other place i can think of that's talked abt humans not just being the same as hylians

have a great week!!

Peace out hugs and chaos,

🌙

[bimir]

it's not something strange or unique to say that after the last haikyuu movie, most of us got into it again, but at the same time, I know for sure that I'm not the only one who benefits the most from this re...union.

I went to see the haikyuu movie alone, and at first, it didn't hit me that much. maybe it was because I couldn't help but wonder how much I would have enjoyed it with my best friend, but we are grown-ups now and long distance.

after a couple of days, the internet was full of haikyuu content again, just like during lockdown, and because of that, I also got into it again and realized how much of a masterpiece it is.

haikyuu is well known, but in my opinion, it is underestimated and categorized by others as just a silly volleyball-sport anime. it saddens me so much that there are so many people who will never get to embrace this piece of art.

Furudate not only created a coming-of-age story, a story that inspired and still inspires generations to fight for their dreams, to engage in the complex mess of relationships, teamwork, and partnerships. haikyuu teaches you that if you really do have a dream, and if you are really ambitious, if you work hard for it, your time will come too. but it also teaches you that not choosing to be great is not a tragedy; your dreams of what a good life means can be different from the ideals of others: "life is unfair, but damn it, at the same time, it is really fair too."

so why did I go on writing about this? because I can't comprehend how haikyuu manages to be there for me at the best time—or the worst, better said—how it really took its "comfort anime" title seriously for me. I started haikyuu in my last year of high school: extremely stressed, depressed, and anxious, so scared of what the upcoming end would mean for me that I'd tricked myself into living by coming to the conclusion that I'd simply not make it to 18 if I didn't see a future for myself. it seemed only fair and the universe would do its thing, no? I know, kinda depressing and triggering, but it did help that miserable me then, it did help but not in the way I prayed it would. the universe didn't send me "death," it sent me life and hope through haikyuu. feeling so empty, so bland for such a long time, haikyuu managed to make me laugh and cry. it doesn't sound like much, but real ones know what I'm talking about. seeing their connection, their ambition, the troubles and feelings I was so desperate to put into words right in front of me saved me from my misery. I began to wish to live, to wish to be like them, to wish to fight, to wish to connect again with people.

now, after almost 4 years, I'm in my last year of uni. the main reason for my depression back then in high school was because I didn't know what to do with my life, what uni and career to choose. hell, I didn't know I would take this path until last autumn, but here I am, on my way to becoming a teacher. it's hard, really hard, but right now, after the new movie, I finally committed to start and finish the manga even though I knew bits and pieces of what happens. it was the best time to read it now. over these 3-4 years, I pondered why I couldn't start getting into the manga and see for myself what happens, but damn it was the best time to read it now. seeing them go all out on their path, learning that in order to succeed you need to fight and fight and fight, to push through, to overcome your limits, to push yourself, to not take it easy if you really want it, came at the best time as I got into a slump and a burnout from learning too much but also not learning enough. I've got to see all of the characters continuing to be pros while fighting for their way, but also choosing to let go of something they once loved in order to live a normal life.

haikyuu is like a reminder that there is more to life than just your high school/childhood years, that your path could take a 180-degree turn at any point, but at the same time, it makes you appreciate those times and not want to sweep your childlike wonder, your growth, and mistakes under a rug. Furudate was a genius for creating haikyuu, and I really hope and pray that haikyuu will continue to be there, to comfort and save future generations until the end of time.

[chrissy-kaos]

**⚠️ trigger warning ⚠️ ** (depictions of suicide)

I’m really not sure where to begin.. So bear with me because I’m just going ramble and write down the thoughts that I’m having rn. It’s going to be all over the place and whatever but you’ll get it. I want to be as transparent as I can.

If you’re not ok with talking about suicide I would step away from this post.

So I’m pretty sure most of you can tell it’s been a terrible past few months for me. Honestly probably the last year and change but who’s counting. But over the last few months I put myself in a whole and couldn’t get out. I got to the point where I didn’t want to wake up, move or be seen. My depression and anxiety were completely uncontrollable. My meds weren’t working anymore. I was at a loss. I tried to get help a few times through my drs but they really weren’t helping at all.

I felt alone and had nobody else to turn too. Deep into my fear of the world and being depressed came a very unexpected surprise. I found a person that was pretty damn near perfect. We were actually friends prior and he stumbled across my tumblr. He decided to reach out at one of the car meets. We had been talking for a long time. Finally we decided to go out on a date. It was amazing. We did go karts, had some amazing Italian food, ice cream after. It was wonderful. We continued to date and hangout over the last few months. I was finally starting to feel ok. I had a reason to wake up everyday.

As time went on I was falling for this guy and he was too.. so he said. Finally I decided that I would have sex with him. If you didn’t know I’m a demisexual. So without having a strong emotional connection I’m not attracted to someone. So we went on another date. It went so good. We go back to his place we have some of the best sex I’ve ever had in my life. It’s probably because I liked him so much. I stayed for a while and then head back home. We left on good terms.

The next day I don’t hear from him. I said ok cool he must be busy. He’ll snap me when he’s got a min. 3 days go by. At this point he’s ghosted me. On day 5 he texts me and tells me he’s sorry. I’m obviously mad at this point and I blew up on him. Long story short he finally says he just wanted to fuck a trans girl to see what it’s like and that he was disgusted with himself after. Thinking that it makes him gay or something. I’m completely devastated. It hurt. He told me so many things about himself, goals, plans. He even told me he loved me.

Overnight he decided I wasn’t good enough for that anymore. He threw me away like I didn’t mean anything to him. He refuses to talk to me or even show his face at the meets. So this goes on for a few days and then my depression just gets worse and worse. I knew it was completely consuming me but I was helpless to stop it. When you feel like a dirty pile of trash that someone just discarded in a ditch it’s hard to come back from that.

This was the last straw for me.. I was done after that

While all of this was going on I’m been battling depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts. I ended up locking myself in my room for 3 days. I didn’t want to move. The whole time wishing I was dead. Fighting the urge to un-alive myself. It was the hardest 3 days of my life. On day 4 I broke. Everything just came all at once and I was powerless to stop it. So I decided death was better than all of this pain and suffering. I wrote my suicide note. It’s not the first one I’ve ever wrote but it was the hardest one. I’ve tried to in the past and all were failed attempts. But this one was different. I knew I’d go through with it.

That night I took a cocktail of pills, something like 25 all together. I drank a bottle of vodka too. I was really ready to die. I really wanted to. It’s crazy to think about that now. But yea, I just so happen to not speak with Koala for few days prior. She check to see if I posted on tumblr which I did. That’s when she knew she needed to come check on me. I guess when she found me I was unresponsive and covered in my own vomit. She quickly called medical services and I was taken to the hospital. They pumped my stomach and I guess I was ok? I don’t remember any of this. I just remember waking up in the hospital. The dr told me that because I drank so much alcohol and it made vomit that probably saved my life. I guess I threw up majority of the pills. She had told them it was a suicide attempt. She found my note. She wasn’t about to take the situation lightly. They made me speak to a counselor and put me on the suicide prevention program list. I have to go every morning now for the next 3 weeks. It’s not ideal but it’s something.

I’m doing much better now. They changed my medication and it’s working. It’s crazy that it got to that point. It’s also such bullshit that it takes something so drastic to get medical help. It’s like they don’t actually care. Which is insane to me. But I’m not saying it’s not going to happen again.Tho hopefully with the help I have now it will certainly diminish the possibility.

I know this is a hard subject to talk about. As a someone that has trouble talking to people in general but I urge you to go and talk to someone if you’re having thoughts like that. There is no coming back from death. It’s not pretty or glamorous. It’s not something to be idolized. If you know anyone that you may suspect is thinking about it please go talk to them. Help them! Sometimes we’re too scared to ask for help!

Please call your local crisis hotline. Don’t wait. You matter! Your life is precious! And yes people do love you!