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sepublic · 3 years

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Forgive me for being such a sentimental bleeding heart, but… I really do wish and hope that Marcy can stay friends with Anne and Sasha, when this is all said and done!

I just… Think it’s so SAD and cruel and unfair, that Marcy ends up ultimately losing her friendship with the girls, BECAUSE of what others outside of that dynamic did. Because of her parents planning to move without any regards to Marcy’s feelings, and how that kickstarts her desperation, not to mention Andrias manipulating her… And it sucks. It really sucks that Marcy’s parents just don’t care about her friendship with Anne and Sasha and threaten to separate that by moving… And by attempting to hold onto that, Marcy still loses that friendship.

If she just quietly went with her parents- Then Marcy would’ve lost that friendship. If she’d went ahead with the music box, she’d STILL lose that friendship. It’s just so… Painfully cynical and it gives me the message that no matter what Marcy did, some outside force would’ve unfairly ruined that for her, isolating the poor girl without her input. And, sure… If Marcy had moved away, she could’ve kept in touch with Anne and Sasha online, and through phone calls…

But still, it’s just heartbreaking to me. It’s all just indicative of her lacking agency and being manipulated, and having no one to turn to… So having her efforts to hold onto her connections in the real threat of losing them, for reasons that aren’t her fault, resulting in an even more permanent loss of those connections; It just feels almost mean-spirited to me. Like she’s being punished for rightfully wanting to hold onto that, for being thrown into situations that enable the worst out of this clearly ND kid -especially with the prophecy and Andrias’ manipulations in mind- and making the ‘wrong’ choice that she was still MEANT to take anyway!

It doesn’t even sadden me as much that Marcy messed up, so much as the fact that… She was in that kind of desperate and isolated, mental and emotional state, to feel like resorting to such actions in the first place, because people don’t do bad actions for fun; Actions Marcy didn’t even realize would’ve actually WORKED, like the music box… And then there’s her, a child, being deliberately manipulated by the adult she trusted, and I really can’t fault her for that at ALL. And we saw, we KNOW that Marcy is willing to quickly change and adapt and respond to her own mistakes; She helps Anne and the others fight Andrias ASAP! This contrasts with Sasha, who DOES somewhat admit her faults with Anne…

But, she still kind of relapses into her old habits. And granted, that partly comes with Sasha having her own emotional stake with Grime and his desires, but manipulating Anne was a step too far. It just messes me up that the one person who actually wanted Amphibia, who fully accepted and whole-heartedly embraced it from the start… Is the one who gets the least, if not nothing, and practically loses it all! Marcy saw everything to gain in Amphibia, every little detail to appreciate and pay attention to, down to stuff like the little seeds; But not only does she not gain anything, she LOSES things like friends and trust and innocence…

Marcy was really the girl most in need of friendship and new bonds she could trust in; So it hurts that of course she’s the only one that never got that! She wanted to keep her friends, but only lost them and then never made any to make up for it. It’s clear that Marcy thinks she has nothing to offer of value, so to basically die thinking she’s worthless and only causes problems, to be used for ONLY a purpose and then tossed aside and murdered like trash by Andrias… UGH it hurts!

She really needed someone to tell her that she’s good for things, and/or that Marcy doesn’t need to justify herself in a relationship. Anne and Sasha had their whole schtick with being protectors and they still have it with the Plantars and Grime, though how healthy this is, is up for debate… But Marcy, well. She said it herself to Anne; She doesn’t think she has anything to offer, nothing useful! That she’s just sort of THERE… Marcy really admires her friends, which makes her own self-perceived deficiencies when comparing herself to them, all the more painful!

She just didn’t want to lose them, because Marcy feels like she needs them more, than they need her; Especially with Anne and Sasha having their own thing, having their own agency that makes them stand up to one another and fight… But I feel like arguably, Marcy did the least harm of the girls, alongside Anne?

But instead she dies thinking she did EVERYTHING wrong, that her own death is even her own fault, that she’s caused an irreparable kind of damage and pain that’s totally for herself to be blamed on… Marcy had Anne and Sasha doing things for her, so of course she jumps at the thought of doing things for Andrias, for helping her friends, and then she dies thinking she’s no longer useful nor desired, that she’ll probably be forgotten.

Ah, well… At least the last few months of Marcy’s life had been incredibly happy for her, maybe the happiest of her life up until that point; She was at least under that impression, and under those valid feelings for it. Where everything was going right, she really began to feel like her own person that was valued in Newtopia, without Anne or Sasha, not quite NEEDING them, but still wanting them, and having that validated when they returned to her life…

Just thinking about the tragedy of Marcy Wu, it kind of makes me sick to my stomach to look at this poor girl who lost so much, who just wanted to hold onto it, who barely had any agency… She wanted and needed the most of the girls, she welcomed and was most open, so why did she get the least, and suffer the most for it? I really wish Marcy had met Valeriana instead, like some fans had speculated…

For this girl who’s been tossed and whirled around, beaten repeatedly by her circumstances; I just want her to find someone who will step down, embrace her, and protect her. Tell Marcy that her feelings are valid, that SHE’s valid, and actually take care of and provide for her in a way that she needs. Someone she feels safe towards and can trust to be herself, loneliness and all, around, and count on them to help her even in the worst times, and to never leave.

#amphibia #amphibia spoilers #amphibia marcy #marcy wu

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alltooreid · 4 years

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All Too Well

Spencer must go to him and Y/N’s once shared apartment to clean out his things and leave her life forever. While there he can’t help but look back on his actions, the ones that made him lose the love of his life forever

A/N: Hi!! This is my first fanfic ever published on here and I’m excited to share it with you all! It’s inspired by one of my favorite Taylor Swift songs All Too Well, but although I utilized some of the lyrical genius and imagery from it, the story is not the same as the story in the song. This is a very angsty fic, and there is not a happy ending. Although there are some cute fluffy elements, including a Reid’s purple scarf origin story, I would in no way call this happy. Additionally, because of a reason you may later realize, the content warnings are very vague. If anything even slightly mentioned in them may affect you, I advise you to maybe stay clear. On a lighter note, if anyone wants to request anything, whether it’s another song inspired fic or a general plot line you would like to see please do so!! Also sorry this is kinda short, I’m still learning but I’m really proud of this one :))

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem Reader

Type: Very Angsty, Not a Happy Ending, (Y/N and Spencer do not end up together)

Word Count: 2.4k

Content Warnings(try to ignore if you would prefer to stay surprised): slight cursing, discussions of death and gore, discussion of car crash

Things to Know: Italics and bold are flashback moments :) let me know what you think!

“But you keep my old scarf from that very first week 'Cause it reminds you of innocence And it smells like me You can't get rid of it 'Cause you remember it all too well”

Spencer was packing up his things, finally getting the chance to clear out and move from the apartment he and Y/N once shared. Their relationship was rocky and unconventional but he loved her all the same. Even though he left her broken-hearted and destroyed his most cherished relationship. Even though Y/N’s parents now hated him because of what he did to her. Even though hope of repairing what they once had was long gone and there was nothing else he could do about it. Even though he had torn up the masterpiece they once had together. He still loved her so much.

But the magic was gone and so was she.

Now Spencer was left with memories, and since the apartment they lived in was hers instead of his, filed entirely under hers and her parents name. In his excessive knowledge and wisdom, Spencer Reid struggled to understand how the kitchen where Y/N told him she loved him for the first time as he lit the candle on the collapsing confetti cake he had attempted to bake for her birthday was in no way legally tied to him.

“Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to Y/N! Happy birthday to you!” Spencer sang as he lit the single pink birthday candle he found after rummaging through his desk drawers for longer than he cared to admit. He knew it was in there somewhere, but at the same time there was a whole lot in there.

As he looked at her face, eyes welling up with tears as she took in the sad, homemade excuse for a birthday party Spencer had thrown together after they got back from a case hours before, he couldn’t help but feel he should have done more. He wanted to take her to New York, where they would’ve enjoyed fine dining and one of those incredibly detailed floral frosting cakes he knew Y/N was infatuated with.

However, the case in Oregon ran long. They had only returned to their apartment 2 hours ago, hours past their 7pm dinner reservations. Although Y/N tried to hide her disappointment, you don’t need to be a profiler to know that someone wants to celebrate their own birthday. So although they had agreed to go to bed and play everything by ear tomorrow, the young genius had, what he would still argue to be, his most brilliant idea when he saw Y/N asleep once he got out of the shower.

It was still her birthday.

And Spencer had just under 2 hours to throw you a party.

So sure, Y/N deserved more than a cake that was definitely not cool enough to frost, but was frosted anyway due to time constraints. And she definitely deserved more than present hastily wrapped in his printed out articles and newspaper clippings. Spencer wished that he had time to go buy new candles, instead of lighting a green sparkly number 7 because it was all he could find.

But it was almost midnight, and that meant he only had 18 minutes before it wasn’t Y/N’s birthday anymore.

So instead of dwelling on it, he headed to their bedroom, shook her awake and watched her roll over to face him. He watched the smile overtake her face as she said the stupid party hat he was wearing, made out of a pom pom and a wedding invitation.

“Hey birthday girl,” he said softly, “you do realize you’re sleeping through your party right?”

She looked so happy that night, even as she saw the way too messy kitchen and her birthday cake that was melting by the second. She laughed as Spencer fumbled with the lighter.

And as he finished singing her eyes started releasing tears.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I wish we could’ve done more for the first birthday we get to spend together. “

“No, no, no” she said as she wiped her tears away, “It’s not that at all.”

She smiled and looked up at him “I just love you so goddamn much Spencer.”

Although at one point, all Spencer knew was logic and logically Y/N had never ever known him when she filed her paperwork, the genius still struggled to grasp the concept. That even before the ending of it all, you had no legal, definite connection to her at all.

How was nothing about this place, his?

All that he knew was that he had today to pack all his shit and leave. All he knew is that Y/N’s father had made it very clear none of their family wanted to see him again.

He wished he could talk to Y/N about it. However all of his calls went to voicemail immediately.

Logically, Spencer knew why, he had completely fucked up.

But still, he called every single day, as there was nothing his heart wished for more than to speak to Y/N again. To apologize, to beg for forgiveness he knew he didn’t deserve.

As the cold air from the open windows blew into the apartment, Spencer couldn’t help but feel he was leaving his home behind. Everything left of her was going to be here, and he wouldn’t get to experience any part of the life you and him had once shared together anymore.

But then he saw it.

The royal purple scarf Y/N bought the day of their first date.

“You like this color right?” she asked as they stopped by a booth at the street festival she had taken him to. Spencer was too distracted as he watched the other couples on dates, as they walked hand and hand down the streets. He sometimes wished he could forget things like the number of germs and bacteria that lived on her hands. He at least wished he could forget long enough to gather enough courage to hold Y/N’s hand as they walked down the sidewalk.

“Hmm?” he said, looking back at her, then the scarf she was now wearing. “Oh, yeah! I love that color, it um- looks great on you.”

She smiled, then turned to the weird old guy running the stand. “How much for the scarf?” she asked.

He looked at her, then looked at Spencer, “depends which one of you is paying.”

Before Spencer could say anything, let alone pull out his wallet, Y/N already had hers out.

“Well, for a pretty lady like you, it’s 2 dollars,” the man said.

She handed him five and turned to Spencer. “You hear that? I’m so pretty I get 80% off! Wonder what you would’ve paid huh pretty boy? He would probably owe you money.” The man handed her her change and whispered something Spence couldn’t quite catch.

“Gross,” Y/N said as they exited the booth, “he wrote his number on my change.”

Spencer chuckled, “Did you really just buy that scarf because I like the color of it?”

She smiled, “Don’t get so cocky now Einstein, I like purple too you know? And maybe if you’re lucky I’ll let you borrow it.”

At that moment Spencer felt just okay enough to wrap his arm around Y/N’s, and she felt just right enough to wrap the new scarf around them both.

The one she left next to her front door, after making the last minute decision to leave it at home the night of their final outing.

No one would notice if he….. Right?

Sure maybe Y/N would but what would she do about it? Hunt him down just to get a scarf she paid less than five dollars for? Definitely not.

He wrapped it around his neck and closed his eyes, even days later he could perfectly picture Y/N singing in his car, fascinated by the autumn leaves falling around her. He felt the wind in his hair, but instead of the cold, dreary air from the open apartment window, he swore he could remember the warm air from that October night.

“Spencer I know you hate it but please, please, please. I’m so tired.”

“Sweetheart you’re not tired, you’re drunk. Of course I have to drive you home.”

“Oh, whatever.”

A phone call broke him away from his memories, it was Hotch. Spencer was angry, how effortlessly cruel of him to call him during such an emotional time. Hotch knew how much Spencer loved Y/N, the whole team did.

So he didn’t pick up.

Instead he walked over to the coffee table they used to put their feet on when they binged watched Doctor Who together. Letting the ringtone play out in the background, Spencer picked up an old photo album Y/N’s parents must have brought out. Of course he remembered it, it was the same one they flipped through when he met Y/N’s parents for the first time. He didn’t realize she had brought it home with her.

His eyes welled up with tears as he flipped through the old school pictures, remembering how embarrassed Y/N was of her big glasses. He saw her old athlete pictures from when she used to play tee ball, and flipped through more pictures until he reached the end of your softball career, in college.

He remembered how hard Y/N blushed when she showed him her childhood bedroom. Her twin sized bed was full of stuffed animals and her walls covered in boy band posters.

“You know what Spencer? I don’t want to hear it. I loved and still love the BackStreet Boys and I am not ashamed of that.”

He laughed, “You know, before we started dating I always thought you were so cool and unattainable. I imagined that you had always been this chic, beautifully brilliant badass. It’s oddly comforting to know that you wore tortoiseshell glasses and had a fruitless infatuation with Nick Carter.”

She gasped, before tossing her tabby cat stuffed toy at him, “You’re about to get it!”

Once again he was called out of the memory by his phone.

And once again he let it ring.

Spencer went into their shared bedroom, most of his things were already put into boxes for him. Honestly he was surprised that they hadn’t been set on fire or thrown away after what he did.

Soon it was time for him to take his things down to his car.

Except it wasn’t even his car. It was Morgan’s.

“Spencer, you are the most gorgeous man I have ever seen in my entire life. I am infatuated with you, I want us to spend the rest of our lives together.”

“You sure that isn’t the alcohol talking Y/N”

“Look at me Spencer, no, no really look at me.”

He couldn’t imagine ever using his old car again after what had happened in it.

“You are my future.”

Not that he could use it again.

“You are my everything.”

It was pretty much destroyed, after that accident on that little town street.

“I want nothing more in my life, than for you to be in it.”

When he was so enamored by Y/N, so in love that he couldn’t take his eyes off her, that he ran a red light.

And the truck waiting to go didn’t stop either.

“SPENCER! SPENCER CAN YOU HEAR ME? I NEED YOU TO CALL 911!” she screamed, her voice filled with agony, her limbs mangled in a sea of crushed mental and snapped backwards by the emergency airbag she didn’t realize she was resting her feet on.

Spencer had already called 911. That was the sickest thing about it. Spencer was, physically, perfectly fine. Spencer would get to leave the hospital after just a few days. Spencer could’ve probably gotten out of the car if he tried to. But he stayed, he stayed with Y/N, as she wasn’t fine. As Spencer looked down on her broken body, and tried desperately to find just one piece of skin that wasn’t coated in blood, her blood, that is when he realized. That not only could Y/N not walk out of the hospital with him, but she probably wouldn’t even make it there.

So he sobbed, he struggled to breathe, not because of the ways Y/N did, but because he had caused all the reasons she couldn’t.

“Hey, Spencer, look at me.”

So he did, and he reached for her hands and held them so tightly, and wanted one last time to feel her squeeze back. And she did, just ever so softly.

“Spencer, I meant everything I said to you. I want you to spend the rest of my life with me. Please.”

“I love you so much Y/N”

“I love you too.”

Spencer was drawn away from his memories once again as he got another phone call.

But it wasn’t Hotch this time. It was Mr. Y/L/N, so he answered it. He owed him that.

“Are you out of her house yet? You’ve had hours. I want you gone Spencer.”

Spencer sighed, “I’m leaving now sir, I’m just putting the last of my things in the trunk and then I’ll be gone.”

“Good, I never want to see you again Spencer, you hear me?” Mr. Y/L/N said. “And you better not have anything of hers either. All that stuff in your car better belong to you and you only. If Y/N paid for even a dime of it it better still be in that house.”

Spencer looked down at this scarf he was wearing, the one that still smelled like her perfume. The one that he couldn’t bring himself to take off because he reminded him of so much innocence and beauty.

“Yes sir, I didn’t take anything.”

“Good. And Spencer do me a favor.”

“Anything sir.”

“Go fuck yourself.” Mr. Y/L/N said, and then hung up. Spencer sighed, he expected that and fully deserved it.

How else should a father react when you kill his daughter?

“'Cause there we are again when I loved you so Back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well”

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid one shot #spencer reid taylor swift #spencer reid angst #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds reid #reid x reader #reid fanfic

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katierosefun · 3 years

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i originally had a september wrap-up post queued but then tumblr fucking ate it, which made me very angry because i didn’t want to re-type the whole thing, but i’m procrastinating, so here i am, re-typing the whole thing of all the things i watched/consumed over the month of september, even if it’s a little late: (it’s fine, i didn’t watch a whole ton of stuff except...a lot of kdramas lmao. oh, and visions.)

k-dramas:

beyond evil

okay, so i think this has been on my rec list for literally forever now, but...besties, i’m on my fifth watch of this goddamn show in the span of maybe two months, so if that doesn’t tell you how much this show has been a comfort/eating my brain lately, idk what will.

i literally never shut up about this show, but if you’ve somehow been missing from my blog for a little bit, a quick summary: lee dong sik (played by the ever-wonderful shin ha kyun) was accused of murder + kidnapping a few young women, including his own twin sister 20 years ago. he’s lived a pretty quiet life on his own, and now 20 years later, his whole world is turned upside down again when hotshot new inspector han joo won (played by the talented yeo jin goo) comes into this little town. when the murders start up again, these two are thrown into a hellishly complex mystery. will throw you in for a hellish loop. i think my thoughts best summarize this show as come for the murder mystery, stay for whatever the hell joo won and dong sik have.

okay, but all joking aside about how much i love joo won and dong sik (because...i truly do love them), this show was incredibly healing. once again: this show has quickly become a comfort show, basically to the point where i just watch it whenever i feel down (which happens to be a lot these days). idk man. humans aren’t meant to carry burdens on their own and all that stuff. sometimes u just need to remind yourself that.

the crowned clown

so, after watching beyond evil the fourth time, i realized that maybe i wanted to watch some of the actors’ other works. that was how i found myself watching the crowned clown, which...is an excellent kdrama now available on netflix (also on viki for free, just as beyond evil is). honestly, it’s been a hot second since i’ve watched historical dramas (saeguks), so i was a little unsure what to expect, but this show. bro. this show reminded me just how much i love historical dramas, because the court politics? the costumes? the music? the acting? fantastic.

basically, this show is about the young clown (ie. performer) ha seon (played by yeo jin goo) who now has to replace the king, who might be like...two seconds away from snapping (if he hasn’t already). the reason they’re able to do this is because they look exactly identical despite not being related.

this story is honestly wonderful. i loved it, and it’s an interesting way to look at the story behind the actual king (because. apparently this king was a real person, and i think his story has inspired quite a few other korean movies/shows). i thought yeo jin goo was brilliant in this show, and it’s really no surprise he became the youngest person ever nominated for a baeksang award because of this series. i was truly blown away by just how versatile he proved to be of an actor, and his dynamics with the other characters (the queen, the secretary being my fave, as well as the old eunuch jo), i just...bro. i’ll admit i wasn’t the biggest fan of the romance (don’t get me wrong! it was sweet!), but i think that might have been because this was so court politics heavy, and i adored it for that. if you’ve never watched a historical drama but want to and just don’t know where to start, i highly recommend this.

d.p.

bro....this show was dark. i watched it all in 2 days (pretty easy to do, considering it’s 6 episodes and maybe 40-50 minutes long per episode), and i needed to lie down. this is just one of those shows that i feel is...very important to watch, even if the content matter isn’t very bright.

basically, dp is about two deserter pursuit officers: ahn jun ho (played by jung hae in) and han ho yul (played by koo kyo hwan). deserter pursuit officers are basically people who chase after people who deserted their military post--and for those who don’t know, being in the military is mandatory for men in south korea. this is the result of the armistice between the north and the south--basically, since north korea never agreed to an actual peace treaty, south korea is constantly under threat of war, which is why men need to serve at least a few years. (this is why a lot of actors + kpop band members often take breaks from their careers--to fulfill their military service time. because yup, even celebrities aren’t exempt from service!)

anyways, this show really doesn’t pull back their punches. major trigger warnings for things like intense harrassment, suicide, domestic violence...it really does capture just how dark life can be, and also how toxic the military can be for men. because of that, i felt this show was incredibly well-crafted, incredibly nuanced, and in the end, i just felt sad. that said though, there was a hopeful ending, and i’m glad that this show was renewed for a second season, as i think this show is just...really important.

squid game

okay, so i don’t want to be that person, but your girl was watching squid game right after it came out, so i was here before the hype train--but okay, okay, i digress. (i am glad that this show is getting hype. i feel it’s very important that people watch this show.)

if you haven’t noticed how squid game’s climbed to #1 on netflix worldwide (i think, anyways), well, then...buddy. squid game is about a bunch of people who have the chance to earn lots of money by playing what seems like innocent children’s games. (spoilers: they are far from innocent.)

this show scarred me, to be honest. i needed to watch something lighthearted after this, just because it was so intense. lots of trigger warnings for blood and gore, as well as just. losing faith in humanity. but also, like dp, i felt this show was necessary. it was incredibly well-constructed in that it showed just what desperate people will do in order to survive, as well as exactly what a terrible capitalistic society will do to the working class. it’s depressing and sad, but also incredibly chilling because like. you can’t help but watch the characters and think, but would i do the same thing? i just want to pay off my own debt and take care of my family. wouldn’t i do the same thing?

i won’t say more of this show for fear of spoilers, but. let me just say. that i really am glad this show exists. i hope people actually notice what the fuck it’s saying about our current system too, because hm, maybe i just want to suck the fun out of things, but there’s something very disturbing about how people are already cute-ifying this show (ie. “this is what i would wear to the squid games! :D” and “look at these squid-game inspired cookies! :D”, as if this show didn’t just deliver a heart-crushing message about capitalism + how the wealthy fuck over anyone who isn’t the 1% BUT ANYWAYS)

star wars: visions

lately i’ve been feeling weird about star wars for lots of different reasons which i don’t particularly feel like addressing today, but. visions really reminded me why i fell in love with star wars in the first place. i think for starters, well. it’s no surprise when i say that i felt an intense amount of joy of seeing east asian cultures so beautifully incorporated and respected in this show (no surprise seeing that this show was literally crafted by japanese anime studios), but like. it really was. a beautiful thing. i cried at least once per episode, either because i was so in awe of the animation and the themes or because i was just in awe that this thing exists.

i think my favorite episode had to be the village bride--there was something so incredibly powerful about seeing someone who looked a bit like me say i am a jedi. what an iconic line. what an iconic story about a sad traumatized gal deciding to step up and fight, actually. peak star wars.

but besides all that...i really did feel like...this show captured the beauty and essence of what makes star wars actually good. the themes of good versus evil, a lot of stuff between siblings (bro....the twins and lop and ocho FUCKED ME UP), choosing to have brighter and better days ahead (the village bride, the ninth jedi, the duel, tatooine rhapsody)...like, i really loved how each episode really took everything that was good about star wars and just turned it into something even more beautiful. this series will stay with me for a long time, i think--and i am very grateful for the people involved in this project for reminding me why i fell in love with this universe in the first place. :”)

#caroline recs #a few days late but here it is!

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iheartkikixo · 4 years

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Thoughts on the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D series finale

********AOS SERIES FINALE SPOILERS AHEAD*********

********AGENTS OF S.H.I.E.L.D SERIES FINALE SPOILERS AHEAD*********

*******SERIOUSLY. IF YOU DON’T WANNA BE SPOILED STOP READING NOW********

You were warned.

Okay. So Agents of Shield is finished.

On the first watch I won’t lie, I was REALLY conflicted and bothered by the ending. I really couldn’t understand why they chose to go that route and I ended up pacing my house for like 30mins. However, after a couple hours of mulling it over, a rewatch and a nap. I understand why they ended it the way they did and actually have a newfound respect and maybe even love for the ending.

I know on first watch seeing everyone (especially May and Daisy) separated and alone initially feels depressing and possibly like the last 7 years of building this family was redundant, but if you look closer, it wasn’t...at all.

When we first met May, she wasn’t just alone, she was broken and self-isolated from everyone that she cared about and who cared about her. After the events of Bahrain, she closed herself down and became a shell of herself while her guilt and self-loathing threatened to eat her alive. The May we see in the final 3 episodes is so incredibly far from that. When Daisy throws Bahrain in her face in s2, the self loathing is still very present and she still can barely speak on it, she still feels like a monster for what happened and she retreats away from the team (to a degree) and back into herself. This reaction is so different to when Kora throws Bahrain in her face in 7x11. May is at a point where she fully realizes she wasn’t the monster in that story, she did what she did to save the innocent, and that at her very core is who she is, a protector of the innocent and those who can't protect themselves. And like she tells Kora, she’s “made peace with it”. In the last scene with May, yes there is a sadness that the team isn’t all together, but she’s not broken, unhappy or even alone. She’s found a new calling teaching at an Academy named after Coulson which upholds his legacy. She’s jovial when Flint comes and she laughs and jokes. It's so far removed from s1 May. Before Bahrain, May wanted kids and even when she was trying to save Katya, you could tell that she cared about kids a lot, this echoes to her protectiveness over the bus kids, and also extends into the Framework where kids being in danger was the thing that kinda brought her back to herself, and then also Robin, who she becomes a mother to. This is where the best of May comes out, she’s a mentor and a protector and in her last scene we see her happily being that to Flint and other students. So it’s full circle, she’s physically away from the team but not holed up alone in a cubicle in pain. She’s healed over these past several years and found a new purpose for her life, and her Shield family and time with them gave her that and made that possible.

The same with Daisy. When we meet her she is truly alone, she’s grown up alone, has nobody, she’s living in a van, she doesn’t even know her real name or date of birth, she’s searching for her family and searching for an identity and purpose. Throughout the last 7 seasons she’s found all of that and more. In this ending, like May, she’s not with the team, but she’s not truly without it either. She’s still in Shield, still doing missions, still in contact with the team, she still has them. If something goes wrong, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that they will come running as they always have, but after several years of fighting Hydra, Inhumans, ghosts, demons, LMDs, aliens, Chronicoms, being stranded on alien planets or at the bottom of the sea, being thrown into the future and then into the past, being mutilated or killed and resurrected or not, they all deserve some reprieve. They also can’t live under each other forever and they all deserve to actually live their lives. At the beginning of the series Daisy was lost and she didn’t know who she was, by the end neither of those are true anymore. She’s found her calling, she’s found family, she’s found relatives, she’s even found love. And now It’s like she’s paying it forward. Someone found her and gave her love, home, family and solid ground and now she’s doing the same for others (namely Daniel and Kora). Everything really goes back to the conversation her and Mack had where he tells her that even if the team dynamic shifts, it's okay and she’ll be okay. In real families we don’t all stay under the same roof forever, we branch out, take jobs in other cities or countries and start families of our own, but it doesn’t negate our original family and I don't think this ending does either. It doesn’t mean found families hold less weight than blood families, because with family (the people you’ve chosen to love and have chosen to love you back, blood or not), even when you’re not around them 24/7, distance and time change nothing. Based on the group conversation, they clearly have been in contact and will continue to be, Jemma saying she’ll email Daisy later about something they had earlier discussed, Mack and Yoyo still being together even though they’re on mission in different places at the moment, May telling Mack she has some names of recruits to send him, Coulson telling Daisy to give him a call once she gets back to Earth etc. It's not that they’re not family anymore or that they’re only gonna contact or see each other once a year, their life choices just have them spread out and busy, but they’re still family. Jemma saying they need to do the group meeting annually doesn’t mean it has to only happen once a year, nor does it mean they won’t interact individually whenever they can, it just means that despite how busy life gets they need to make sure they as a whole group isolate some time to be together however they can. That is the most family thing ever. Throughout the year ppl are busy and you see each other but not everyone together at the same time, but then you have something like Thanksgiving or Christmas where everyone makes it their business to find themselves under the same roof for a day. It feels like the same concept applies here. It only feels sad right now because it's new, but after a while it will be normal. They’ve spent the better part of a decade living under the same roof and now they’re not even on the same planet all the time, it's a weird adjustment, but they will adjust.

As far as Philinda goes. Philinda has been my AoS OTP since season 1 and while I was kinda sad initially that they didn’t end together, I get it. Phil is dead and PhilLMD is just that, an LMD. A robot. He’s not real and as such, while still having Philinda scenes makes me happy, I don’t think I want May to have to settle for a robot no matter how advanced. It’s not fair. Especially with her being an empath now, every time she touches Phil it's a reminder that he’s not real. He can’t grow old with her or be truly intimate because everything about him is coded into him. She deserves the chance and the space to move on and find something real with someone real and him being around her all the time would prevent that because she loves Phil, even though he’s not really here anymore. Phil was ready to go in season 5 as he felt like he had already been given a second chance and didn’t want to be greedy, which is why he didn’t seek out the cure in space. LMD!Phil who works solely off of Phil’s memories and feelings is echoing the same sentiments by contemplating shutting down. It's not fair for May to let herself explore this any deeper (especially now being an empath as she feels things more deeply), only for him to decide to shut down leaving her again, and it's not fair for them to explore this and him to force himself to stay operative until she dies as to not hurt her again, even though his Phil coding is telling him it's time to go. I feel like once everyone is comfortably settled into their new lives and he knows they’re all truly okay, he’ll shut down for good, until then he’s just around in case they need him.

I don’t think I need to speak too much on Fitzsimmons or Mackelena. With everything Fitz and Simmons have endured over the last 7 seasons, retirement (not sure if Simmons is fully retired too) seems beyond reasonable. We’ve watched them lose each other or themselves in one way or another every season, and like everyone else on the team they kept coming back for more when it would’ve been easier to walk away and most probably would have. But they're not most people, they are a family and refused to abandon the team while it was in need. So this ending with their super cute kid is just very deserved and great to see. Mackelena. I love that they’re still agents. I was also initially surprised Mack was still an agent as he seemed like the most likely to leave a couple seasons ago. Maybe the Adventures of Mack and The D gave him a new outlook, realizing that there are so many out there who want to and will do good if given the space and opportunity to. I also love that Piper asked for a Davis LMD and that he and Piper can argue like old times. I thought that was kinda cute.

Overall, I feel like this moment was necessary. Change sucks, but it's necessary for growth. I also think the messaging is great and applies to the cast, the fans and just the world in general. Change isn’t bad, people come into our lives for seasons and they teach us, love us, heal us and sometimes leave us, but that’s not the end. There are new people and new adventures waiting, and the same way people come into your lives for a reason, we also are destined to go into other people's lives and be that person who teaches, loves and heals them the way someone did for us. It’s a cycle. And that's one of the ways the world moves forward and gets better. Good people bringing out the best in other people, who move on to bring out the best in other people, creating more and more good people. Philindaisy will always hold the most special place in my heart in this show. Phil found May in her cubicle and Daisy in her van, and the three of them saved each other in so many ways and gave each other everything they needed as well unconditional, unwavering love and support which helped them move beyond their past traumas to the point where they were mentally healthy and strong enough to not just have the family they formed with each other, but also form their own families outside of the original family unit and do the same for others. That in itself is beautiful. This is the end of this particular part of their journey, but in no way do I think it's the end of the family that they all formed over the last 7 years, because you don’t go through all they went through and then just feel nothing. They will forever be a part of each other and they will forever pull from the lessons, experiences and love they have for and gave each other. And that’s life, and also what I’m taking away from this show.

#agents of shield #aos finale #aos spoilers #philinda #philindaisy #melinda may #phil coulson #daisy johnson

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thenexusofsouls · 3 years

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I wonder how the OldBoy plot would have gone if Marie was a lesbian? Like- lol, imagine you wait 20 years to get revenge, a very twisted revenge, which consists of getting your victim to have sex with his own daughter. Then, when the sex scene is supposed to take place, she just goes "oh, I'm sorry, I like women, so..." IMAGINE THE DUDE'S FACE. HIS REVENGE IS SUDDENLY IMPOSSIBLE. That would have been great. This movie was so sad.. tho I did feel a lil bit gay for Elizabeth and Evil!Goth!Mantis.

{i am the caretaker of souls} HAHAHA, OMFG! I didn’t even think about that! Below the cut because long:

I mean... Adrian still got a whole lot of revenge on Joe tbh even without that final twist at the end. He was still locked up for 20 years, still framed for his wife’s murder, still had to watch her being raped and killed in that video, still lost his daughter and was out of her life for all those years... so he was certainly punished considerably. But I feel like... yeah, that last twist was what Adrian was really waiting for. He wanted to hurt Joe in the same sort of deeply personal way that he felt hurt.

Side note, during that sex scene, the look on Adrian’s face was just heartbreaking to me. He wasn’t happy, he wasn’t like... haha I got you, you asshole... it was more just like... I don’t even know what to call that expression. Vindication? Validation? Relief? Catharsis? And Haeng-Bok wasn’t looking at the screen, she was looking at him. Like she knew how much this meant to him. Like she wanted to share that moment with him.

Another side note, I kinda need to know what Adrian and Haeng-Bok’s story was. How did they meet? How did she come to be so loyal to him? Where/how/why was she trained in such deadly martial arts? Why did Adrian allow her to essentially live with him? I always kindof assumed they were lovers, but I guess they could be business partners with benefits? Maybe she was an escort with a particular set of skills outside of the norm? I don’t know. Adrian strikes me as gay, though just with his mannerisms and his only sexual relationship that’s confirmed being m/m. But I guess if you assume that he was with Haeng-Bok sexually then maybe he could have been bisexual. I just need to know more about their realtionship because it seemed very close and built on a lot of trust. She seemed to really care about him and he trusted her a great deal to help him with his plans and was clearly upset when Joe killed her.

To be honest, while I don’t condone anything that Adrian did, there’s a part of me that feels so badly for him and Amanda. They were abused and brainwashed by their father, and for Adrian for the rest of his life to still be consumed by the pain of losing a father and family that was so screwed up and traumatic and abusive is incredibly tragic and sad to me. And then the way he just shoots himself at the end... like the only reason he was living was to have closure and some kind of resolution to his pain through revenge, and once that happened, he was totally fine with not living anymore. That’s so sad. But he didn’t have to do all that terrible stuff he did, that was unforgivable.

I feel the most badly for Marie out of everyone. She was completely innocent in everything, lost her first set of parents, lost her second set of parents, had this hard life, got addicted to drugs, had some bad relationships... I feel like she was just looking for love and some kind of connection with someone. And then when she finds it........ yeeeeeah. But she doesn’t even know, and that hurts my heart. All she knows is that he “did something unforgivable” and is out of her life now. She has to feel abandoned, she had to be worried for him, I mean she got no closure whatsoever. He’s just one more bad relationship to her now, and yet she still loves him. Ugh, it’s so messed up. I have so many feels about this it’s not even funny.

But holy crap, yeah, what is Marie had been a lesbian? That would have really thrown a wrench in his plans. Honestly, though...... okay here’s two thoughts that I’m just pulling out of nowhere, heh. Not canon at all, just throwing out my own whatevers. First one...

Marie wears a cross necklace in the movie. I headcanon that her adoptive mother was Christian and very devout, sometimes to a fanatical degree. This created a lot of tension between them after her adoptive father died when she was seven from cancer, because Marie started drinking and doing drugs by the time she was in high school. What if......... Okay, because Adrian said something like, “It took a while to change her name and records, to find the right parents...” The right parents? What if... he purposely chose extremely religious Christian parents knowing that Christianity looks down on homosexuality... as a kind of insurance that Marie would be brought up straight? Of course I know sexuality is not a choice and not the result of your upbringing, but many people choose to stay in the closet and even to sadly force themselves into lives they don’t want because they want their family’s approval. Marie did seem 100% straight to me in the movie, but what if she had kindof steered herself into that life or maybe just never even thought about being a lesbian because of her religious upbringing? And Adrian chose those parents for her as an added pressure for her to be straight? It’s an interesting idea. Because he seemed to know everything about her and about all else he was setting up, and always seemed to have everything under such tight control, so it would make sense that he would try to control that as well.

And the second idea is that Adrian developed his revenge based on Marie being straight, and as he watched her grow up, he adjusted what he wanted to do according to what he thought he could manipulate both her and Joe into. I don’t think he would have gone into this blind. He would’ve made sure that what he intended to happen was going to happen. So either he thought he had everything adequately planned out from the beginning, or he adapted to the person Marie grew into as Joe sat imprisoned and Adrian formulated the details of his revenge.

And omg, for sure, both Lizzie and Pom made me feel very gay in this movie. They were both very gorgeous and sexy. More and more I feel like I’m functionally straight but philosophically bi. XD

#muse: marie sebastian #tw: rape mention #tw: incest mention #tw: suicide mention #w: drugs mention #oldboy 2013

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padfootagain · 5 years

Text

Comme Des Enfants

I'm participating to @madamrogersstorytelling 's challenge using image prompts to write some fics! So here is my first fic for the event, for the Marauders, and I used this picture!

No warnings, just fluff

Word count : 3200

"Oi! Padfoot! Watch out!"

"Oh, shut up, Moony!"

"You are both crushing me!"

"Stop pushing, Wormtail!"

"Shh! There! Look! It’s Y/N and Lily!"

The four boys were suddenly paying full attention to their surroundings. Lying in the snow, they were hiding in the trees on the edge of a little path leaving Hogsmeade. January had brought more snow than usual, and the world was as white as the lazy clouds drifting up above. The trees had lost their leaves and their branches wore both snow and frost as one would wear a blanket or a coat. It was quiet, that weekend. Trips to Hogsmeade were usually loud and full of adventures, but not this year. Maybe it was because the boys were enjoying their last year at Hogwarts, and with maturity (or well, growing up, at least) came a sense of calm and experience that had made them quite immune to the excitement of the younger students. Maybe it was because most parents refused their children to make the trips to the village, because of the constant threat that seemed to hover over the Wizarding society these days.

No matter the reason, the path was quiet, the last houses of Hogsmeade on their left puffing their grey smoke by their chimney in a peaceful way, and ahead on their right, the clearing was empty.

They had taken great care in erasing their footsteps in the immaculate snow. After all, they were pursuing an important spying mission.

You were supposed to go on a date. Today. With a Ravenclaw. And it was secret to no one but to you and Sirius that Sirius was head over heels for you. He had been for such a long time, he wouldn't have been able to tell when it had started.

It was at first a craving to spend more time with you, but it didn't feel bad at all. He simply found himself lingering in the library to get a chance to see you, waiting for you after Quidditch training so you would walk back to Hogwarts together, saving you a seat at lunchtime next to him. It felt like getting a new best friend at first, but not just quite, it felt… better. More excitement when you appeared, more sadness when you had to part, more void when the holidays came.

And then you had grown up even more, and suddenly the world was not only made of friends but of lovers too. Sixth year, 17, and then boys invited you to Hogsmeade on dates and you were kissing some of them in empty corridors. Meanwhile, Sirius's feelings grew sadder and sadder at every boy that came orbiting around you, as if they broadened a chasm that had always separated the two of you, keeping you apart.

Sirius had put words on the way he felt only at the beginning of this last year at the wizarding school though. You had been hit by a bludger during the first match of the season. You had remained unconscious for five hours. He had never been so afraid in his entire life. The realization that he might lose you, that you were not a constant in the world such as the speed of light, shook him so deeply and put in question his universe so much that his entire perception of the world had changed.

Suddenly, the war was real.The thought of you fighting was unbearable, although absolutely undeniable. Future was to be planned further than tomorrow, it had to be planned in a world where you would be safe.

Out of these feelings for you, he had grown up more these past few months than the past two years. And yet, what a couple of years it had been.

It was a strange feeling, really, to plan the world around a person that is not one's own self. Changing the world, not just because it was right, but because you would be in it, and he had to make it right, for you. Breaking through his trauma because he had to be a better man for you, not to simply heal himself. Forgetting how to put the blame on himself because you hated it when he did that. Growing kinder because that was what you liked the most in him.

It was hard to grow out of childhood, although he had thought he had been thrown out of it a long time before. Running away from his family had a tendency to push a child out of dreams too fast, indeed. Innocence? He had lost that one a long, long time ago living in a family that could only give him hatred and curses instead of affection and love.

But then, the Potters were there, a family he had embraced and cherished, and through which he felt a little bit like a boy his age was supposed to feel. And he had his three incredible friends too. His brother always by his side.

And then his world had stopped orbiting around the sun to centre on you instead, and he couldn't be a boy all of a sudden. There was a whole world to change for you, after all.

"So, if Clough arrives, what do we do?" James asked his brother next to him.

"Curse him?" Peter proposed, but Remus shook his head.

"No, scaring him off would be better. Less risks of getting caught."

Sirius rolled his eyes.

"Nothing. We do nothing."

His three friends stared at him in unison as if he had suddenly proclaimed that he would cheer for Slytherin for the next Quidditch match instead of playing against them.

"What do you mean 'nothing'?" James asked with a frown.

"We do nothing. I just want to know if he'll come and if… if she'll be alright."

"So… we are losing an afternoon in Hogsmeade to look at Y/N being snogged?" Peter asked with an even deeper frown than James's.

"Wormtail!" Sirius snapped.

"No, no, no, no. He's got a point," Remus argued, nodding to Peter in agreement.

"What are we doing here?!" James asked again in disbelief.

"I told you, I just want to make sure she's okay, then we can go."

James let out a sigh and took off his glasses to rub his eyes.

"Really, Pads, you are ridiculous."

"How is it ridiculous to care for a friend?"

"No, that's not what you're doing. You're not caring for a friend. You have to tell her!"

"Tell her what?"

"Now, don't you dare play dumb with me."

"I'm not. Tell her what?"

"That you love her."

A deadly silence settled on the group, but as Sirius searched through his friends' faces, he could find no support, only accusations.

"You have to tell her, you're torturing yourself!"

"I'm not."

"Yes, you are! Stop this nonsense, and tell her the truth."

"I can't."

"Why? Why by Agrippa's hat can't you tell her the truth!?"

But Sirius didn't reply. Instead, he looked at you again. You were almost at the clearing now.

"Pads?"

"I'll just stay here for five minutes. See that all is fine, and then I'll leave her to her date."

"You're a moron."

"She doesn't feel the same, Prongs."

Sirius's expression had turned sadder. Sirius was not a child anymore. He had learnt his lesson: dreams did not come true. Everyone had to grow up, eventually. There was no Neverland to stay young forever instead. And in the real world, you deserved better than what he could offer.

And James was tired of this whole nonsense.

Because you loved him, and he loved you, and you were perfect for each other, and truly, after years of mutual pinning, and Sirius being stupid, and you being oblivious, and him being jealous, and you making him jealous, and him blowing up all his chances, and you offering him chances he didn't take… James was so tired of this whole bullshit that he wanted to scream his lungs out and tear the whole sky apart.

It was more than time for someone to do something about it. And if no one else was fit for the job, then he would have to do it himself.

Without a word but with his jaw clenched, James stood up and hurried down the path after you, calling after you and Lily. For a moment, Sirius could only watch in horror the scene playing for him in slow-motion.

What was Prongs doing?!

"Oi! Y/N! Lily! Wait for me!"

The idiot. The bloody, sticky ghoul would break everything!

Sirius jumped to his feet and ran after his friend.

"James!"

But the young man had already reached you.

"Y/N, sorry to be direct like that, but this whole thing has been going on for long enough!"

"JAMES!" Sirius roared, reaching him and grabbing him by the arm, pulling him away. "Stop it!"

"Sirius?" you frowned hard. "What by Merlin's beard is going on?"

"Sorry, it's fine. James is… drunk."

"At three in the afternoon?" Lily raised a surprised – and unconvinced – eyebrow.

"Of course, I'm not drunk!" James replied, struggling against his friend's grasp. "Look, Y/N, I have to tell you…"

Sirius reached for his wand, but Remus was faster at taking it away from him.

"Prongs is right, this has been going on for too long."

Before Sirius could react, Remus and Peter wrapped their arms around him and pulled him away from James, who was now free to make the most terrifying of propositions.

"Y/N, would you accept to not go on a date with Clough this afternoon and go on a date with Sirius instead?"

Sirius froze, stopping to fight against his friends' grip. He was staring at James, horror making him paler. He was aware of your stare, but couldn't muster the strength and will to look at you.

Meanwhile, Lily was nudging you.

"Come on, Y/N!"

You cleared your voice.

"Why are you asking me this?" you asked James in a trembling voice.

"You adore each other, it's more than time that someone gives you a little push in the right direction, don't you think?"

You didn't reply right away, instead, you looked at Sirius, who was now staring at his feet buried in the snow.

"Well," you replied in a voice a little too neutral, "if he really felt that way, he would tell me himself, I suppose."

You waited for Sirius to raise his grey eyes to you, you waited to plunge right into their depth and only come up searching for air, but he kept his stare locked on his feet, and remained silent.

Meanwhile, James was pestering after his friend and nudging him to talk to you, but Sirius merely ignored him and didn't move a muscle.

"I swear to Merlin, you are a lost cause," James angrily sighed.

"I'm sorry, I have to go now. I have a date," you mumbled under your breath before trying to walk pass the group, but it was Remus's turn to stop you.

"No, James is right. All this has been going on for long enough," the young man agreed. "Now, the two of you have to sort this out. And it has to happen now. We'll leave you to it."

Remus dragged Peter and James away, and Lily followed them with an amused expression on her lips, soon taking James's hand as they walked up the road again towards the centre of the little town.

You remained there, with Sirius, standing in the snow. A crow croaked a few meters away, breaking the heavy silence that instantly settled between you and Sirius as soon as your friends walked away.

It was very cold, and your skin was starting to burn under the freezing air. The wind blew to cut your cheeks and numb your fingers. You shivered, not daring to speak or move.

The truth was, you hoped James was right. Because you had stopped seeing only a friend in Sirius long ago, but he had never given you any sign that he might feel the same. You had thus been living your life orbiting around the brightest star without being able to stretch your hand and reach. Instead, you tried to forget altogether that the star was there, that maybe your trajectories could finally cross. You tried to distract yourself with comets, but what were balls of ice and dust compared to a whole sun?

"So… is it true?" you asked in a shaking voice.

You were so scared of the answer, but you reckoned it would help, to hear it directly coming from him. It would kill the little hope you had left to hear that he didn't feel the same. It would push you away from him for good, and you would lose your orbit to leave drifting in the rest of space instead. Or at least, you hoped so. You expected that.

Sirius was not replying.

"Can you say something? You've been accused of fancying me, I thought you would be adamant at defending yourself against such rumour," you joked, although there was not enough humour in your voice to make the words funny.

Finally, he raised his gaze to meet yours, a little smile on his lips.

"You almost sound like you wouldn't slap me if I did feel like that."

"I wouldn't."

The smile disappeared from his features, and his gaze became an intense stare, and… there, you had fallen into his eyes and were trapped now, the only way out would be for him to look away.

"Right… that might be a little violent, you're right," he went on in a breath, the warm air escaping from his lungs drawing strange white forms in the cold wind. "Just… a nicer push away then."

You didn't answer. You didn't have the courage to. You wished to flee, but couldn't muster the strength to look away. Damn Sirius and his grey puppy eyes…

He took a sharp intake of breath as you remained silent, and took a step closer to you as he frowned.

"Y/N… you would push me away, right?"

You could only shrug, and Sirius stopped breathing altogether.

"But you…"

He bit his tongue, stopping himself right before he would let the words slip.

He wasn't a child anymore, he knew the consequences that would follow his actions. And he kept on repeating in his head the same words over and over again.

You deserve better.

He cleared his throat, burying his hands in his pockets, desperately looking for something to say but finding nothing.

"But you don't ask," you answered with a nervous, breathy laugh and tears shining in your eyes. "You've never asked. You never will. So, it doesn't matter, really."

"I… I…"

"I'd better get going."

"Would you…? I… I can't…"

You gave him a kind smile.

"Why don't we forget all of this happened?" you offered. "That sounds like a good idea. Let's forget about James's silly ideas."

His throat had turned unbelievably dry, and he couldn't only blame the cold wintery air.

"Is he that silly, though?"

"You would have asked me by now, if you saw me this way."

"You could have done that too."

You laughed.

"And scare you away to the next century? No, no, no. That would have been unwise."

And finally, he saw it. The way your eyes saddened, the way your lower lip trembled and then tightened against the upper one, the way you tried to control your breathing and failed.

Bloody hell… James was right.

"Do you like me?" Sirius asked in a shaking whisper.

You huffed in response, but you were such a terrible liar.

"Merlin…"

"Shut up," you warned him.

"I didn't think you felt that way."

"Sirius, you've got to stop…"

"I'm not good enough for you. I'm sorry."

"Stop saying things like that. I hate it when you do. And it doesn't matter anyway, because I know… just… forget it."

"You could have so much better. But… Merlin, Y/N…"

He tried. He tried with his entire might, all his strength, all his will, to stop himself from crossing the distance between the two of you. Because you could have better, and he lived in the real world, not in one of these romantic fairytales, in the real world, dreams didn't come true. And yet…

… oh, maybe, just for once, a dream could come true. Maybe… maybe sometimes miracles did happen in the real world too. Sirius hoped so. He wished for it with all the desperation of an Icarus reaching for a sun, a foolish hope perhaps, but a hope anyway, and it had to be enough. Maybe, just for this one time, it would be.

Before you could move away, he had closed the distance between the two of you and was pressing his lips to yours.

You were too surprised to fully understand what it all meant, you were merely aware of Sirius's kiss, and the way it made you feel, from the fireworks exploding through your veins to the tickles up your spine. You wrapped your arms around him as you finally closed your eyes, leaning in his embrace as a reflex, a thoughtless movement that seemed too natural to be denied.

When he eventually broke away, he rested his forehead against yours, both of you breathless and shaking.

"I… I don't want you to go on a date with Clough," he confessed. "Please, don't go on a date with Clough. James is right about me. I… I've felt this way for a while now, but I… figured out you didn't feel the same as you were going out with other guys, and you could have better than me anyway, so…"

You shushed him by pressing another kiss against his lips.

"Would you go out with me this afternoon?" you asked in a whisper, your eyes closed as you rested your forehead against his once more.

He chuckled.

"I knew you'd ask me out if you liked me."

"Shut up and answer."

"I can't answer if I shut up."

You couldn’t refrain a laugh. Only Sirius could joke at a moment like this. That was one of the reasons you loved him…

"I'd love to go out with, Y/N. But first… let's kiss again, shall we?"

"Yeah, sounds like a plan."

But just as your lips brushed one more time, some snow hit you both on the cheek.

You gasped at the cold sensation against your skin, while Sirius was already brushing the snow off the side of his Gryffindor scarf.

"Prongs! You are so dead, man!"

"That was getting very cheesy around here," James exploded with laughter.

Another snow ball flew to hit your arm, and Lily was brightly laughing.

"You traitor!" you accused her in a fit of laughter.

You were soon picking up some snow also, before Sirius and you would exchange a glance, and then a smile.

Maybe dreams did come true once in a while, after all, even in the real world. Or maybe, there was still a little bit of a child in him left.

******************************************************

Tag list : @ponycake27 @horsesreign @xinyourdreamsx @jbluevelvet @fudgeflyss @stuckupstucky @snek-shit @suchatinyinfinity @i-padfootblack-things @buckybsarmy @heyohheyitsgabi

@presstocontinue @ilmiopiccolounivers0 @madamrogers @drinix @sad-orange-thoughts

@geeksareunique @giggleberts @ladyblablabla @mikeselevenn @knowledgeisthebomb @newtstarmanders @wangmangagavroche

#Sirius Black #sirius black x reader #sirius #sirius x reader #sirius black fanfiction #sirius black fic #sirius black imagine #sirius fanfiction #sirius fanfic #sirius imagine #imagine #fanfiction #fanfic #marauders #hp #marauders era #marauders fanfiction #marauders imagine #writing

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dented-nado · 5 years

Note

Loved your last prompt fill! Would you consider 15. “Are you cold?” Superbat :)

[[Sorry this took me so long!! This turned out a bit angsty, dealing with Bruce pushing himself and mental health issues, but its overall hurt and comfort

At times, it felt the cold was all he could feel. Some might think he was being over-dramatic, but sometimes, Bruce would fall into a quiet slump that only those who had known him for a long time really recognized. He wouldn’t really be angry… or sad… or happy… he’d be just… flat… to everything. Bruce himself hated getting like that because it made decisions a lot harder - he just didn’t have the energy to really care… and he didn’t really want to think about why it was happening either.

He, and others around him had just learned to wait it out.

“He’s just in a mood, he’ll get over it.”

“Don’t take it personally, he’ll be back to ordering us around in no time.”

“That’s just how he is sometimes.”

Bruce tended to only realize those words actually hurt him when he finally was able to pull himself out of his slump, his fatigue with everything life had thrown at him, and by then it was too late to protest or say that it had hurt him.

Not that he’d ever say something like that anyway, even if he did recognize he felt hurt by it right away.

Because deep down, he was sure he didn’t really matter.

So, on Gotham nights like tonight, where he was shut down emotionally and mentally even to himself, the cold really was the only thing he could really know he was feeling. A biting chill that stung his face every time the wind blew. Even the batsuit didn’t stop his body pulling blood and warmth away from his fingers and toes to better protect itself from the elements. He flexed his hands as he went about his patrol, trying to plead with his body to go a little longer. If all he was going to feel was cold, he thought he’d rather not feel it at all. For nothing to truly bother him. To be able to make decisions and carry out his tasks not unlike a machine. Going in, getting the job done, and barely ever needing maintenance.

Instead, here he was, mind shut down but body brutally aware of the freezing breeze that felt like pelting him tonight.

Just a little longer.

Keep going.

If you stop, you lose.

He had drowned out the voice of Alfred who had practically begged him for several long minutes to come home, warm up, eat something and go to bed.

He had barely acknowledged Dick, who had tried to talk to him, but had gotten exasperated and done trying after Bruce failed to respond to him… not like Bruce really blamed him for heading out… he only wished he could make up his mind on whether to reach out or retreat away further. The latter - was the option he was beginning to think to be the option that would give most of his children a better chance at happiness.

There hadn’t been any big crimes, only a few muggings, but that didn’t stop him stubbornly continuing his search, convinced something was going to happen.

Something had to happen.

Maybe even if he came home bruised and battered… at least he’d feel something else… right?

After another hour of pushing on, biting cold, fingers getting stiffer with the cold, he landed on top of one of Gotham’s oldest buildings. He looked out over the city… as quiet as Gotham could be. He looked down at his grappling gun, his fingers were trembling… it was looking down at his shaking hands that made him finally realize the rest of him was shivering. His breath formed little clouds in front of his face as his breathing was starting to be more labored. He clenched his teeth and tightened his grip on the grappling gun, almost like he was trying to strangle it.

His mind flip-flopped between wishing the whole world would disappear and wishing someone would find him and tell him it was okay. His vision narrowed into a tunnel. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears.

“why can’t I just feel or not feel?” He asked himself.

“Why can’t I be better?? Or just not care anymore?”

With a growl of frustration, he threw the grappling gun at the ground and keeled over, crouching and wrapping his arms and his capes around himself. He felt his eyes grow hot like they wanted to cry but he couldn’t he just couldn’t.

Thoughts swirled in his mind, biting at him just as intensely as the cold.

“Why am I here?”

“What am I doing??”

“Is it even worth it? Is there a point?”

“am I doing it wrong?”

“I can’t do it. I can’t do it. I can’t do it.”

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry….”

He wondered if he had done something purely wicked and evil as a child to deserve this. To deserve to loose mom and dad, to deserve his best friend descending into madness, to deserve to feel so out of control of himself that he’d flip between feeling too much and not being able to feel at all, deserve to feel like he has no choice but to cut himself off from everyone if he doesn’t want anyone he loves to get hurt ever again.

Maybe he was the constant… maybe if he didn’t exist… maybe…. maybe….

“Are you cold?”

Right on time… just like when he stepped in the way of a bullet or caught someone right before they hit the ground… he was there.

Normally Bruce would have scrambled to his feet and tried to claim he was just thinking about a case, but instead he just shivered, unable to help his teeth chattering and just barely turned his head in Superman’s direction.

Clark’s red boot clad feet touched the ground quietly, and he smoothly leaned down, hand on Batman’s back. His red cape spilling on the ground and bringing a bright color back into a dull world.

“You’re cold.” He said softly, without judgement as he worked slowly, moving his hand from Batman’s back to around his shoulders.

Bruce felt goosebumps form up and down his arms, Clark’s warm arm starting to battle the cold that had enveloped him. Of course, the man… child of the sun… was quite literally a walking heater.

Slowly Bruce closed his eyes, allowing himself to be moved so his face was pressed against his super friend’s chest as Clark pulled him into a quiet hug.

He sighed, letting Clark’s natural warmth envelop him. He released his arms that has been curled around his sides and wrapped his own arms around Clark, despite warming up he had started shivering even more. He decided it was better to feel warmer at that moment than pull away “because it was a hug”.

“I’m going to take you home B…”

Bruce nodded, now squeezing his eyes tightly shut as if somehow that would help him forget the world around him.

They were flying, Clark was holding him.

“I’m sorry” Bruce mumbled in a hoarse voice.

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for B.” Clark hushed calmly.

—-

“You don’t have to stay around Clark.” Bruce tried to say as he sat, warming up beside the fire Alfred had lit, still feeling the deeper chill hadn’t gone away.

“I know. But I want to. Unless you want me to leave.”

Bruce stayed silent.

Clark smiled. “I didn’t think so.”

Bruce took a long sip of his honey lemon tea now that it was finally cool enough to not burn his tongue.

“So why were you punishing yourself out there?”

Bruce nearly spit his tea back out. “I wasn’t…!” He met Clark’s eyes, and shut his mouth. He had expected Clark to be sitting there rolling his eyes at his behavior, but instead all he saw was genuine worry.

“…I didn’t mean to be.”

Clark put a hand on his knee. “I know Bruce, I don’t think you ever mean to.”

Bruce bit his lip.

Clark was his first friend he had let in in a while. Something about Clark screamed safety, and it wasn’t because he was Superman. It was written in the way he would gently stay by his side, how he would smile at him, how he would listen to every single word and take everyone into careful consideration. Whenever Bruce had struggled to be open in the way most friends are with each other… how he had remembered being with friends in past… Clark was incredibly patient, would gently urge him out of his comfort zone but never shame him for struggling.

He loved him. Not just in a “I want to kiss him and wake up beside him everyday way.”. He loved him in a “You make me believe that life can be better than this, you make me feel like I can heal and be loved as I am” kind of way.

But at the same time, it scared him… because what if he was so awful that the warmth and light he loved in Clark so much would go out?

“It’s… just a mood I get in, I’ll get over it..” He grumbled, curling his legs up onto his seat with him.

Clark raised his eyebrows. “What kind of a mood?” He asked seemingly innocently.

Bruce swung his head back to him. Would Clark even know what he was talking about if he told him?

“…Do you ever…. just not really feel anything?” Bruce suggested slowly.

Clark tilted his head to the side. “Like an empty kind of feeling?”

Bruce swallowed hard. “I… think that’s one way to put it.”

“Yeah… I’ve felt that way before. After what happened with Black Mercy… there were lots of times I felt like that. It was…”

“Frustrating?” Bruce suggested.

Clark nodded. “Yeah, frustrating.”

“Like you either want to be able to mourn or…” Bruce continued, leaning forward a little.

“Really not feel anything at all?”

Bruce nodded.

Clark smiled at him. “So… when you or others say you’re in a “mood” is that’s what’s happening.”

Bruce looked down at his lap and slowly nodded again.

Clark took a deep breath and moved a little closer to sit beside Bruce.

“I think… you know how when you hurt yourself, you try to do things to distract yourself from the pain?” Clark suggested. “And if you’re in pain for a long period of time, eventually you just accept it’s there?”

“Yeah…” Bruce agreed.

“I think your mind does that too, when your hurt? I think you do feel, a lot, it’s just too much for you to handle all at once. It’s just trying to avoid thinking of what your feeling to protect yourself.” Clark said, arm now back around Bruce’s shoulders.

“…. I know your right. I just… wish I didn’t have to deal with it at all.”

“I know… but I think you have to if you want to move on, in any way. I was in therapy for six months before I finally broke down about how it felt… to lose a whole lifetime you were convinced was real….”

Bruce looked at him a bit shocked. “You went to therapy?”

Clark nodded. “Oh yeah. I mean you remember back then, you had to stop me from doing something I would have regretted just because deep down I was so angry about the whole thing but refused to tackle it.”

“Does your therapist know your…”

“One of the few.” Clark said with a slight quirk of his lips. “Even Superman needs to talk about shit sometimes.”

Bruce couldn’t help a small smile. “Well when you swear, I know you’re serious about it.”

“You’re damn straight I am.” Clark chirped playfully nudging his body against Bruce’s.

“I guess… I should… I just never really thought… you know… I’m a billionaire, I’m batman… what do I have to complain about?” Bruce replied, only half joking.

“You’re allowed to feel things Bruce. Your worth it, I promise you.”

Bruce studied Clark’s face, chest feeling heavy.

“What makes you so sure?”

Clark brushed a hair out of Bruce’s face, startling the dark knight slightly, but he quickly realized Clark wasn’t even aware he was doing it as he looked Bruce over almost… affectionately.

“Because I know you.” Clark replied.

“…You do.”

Finally, for the first time that night… Bruce felt warm.

#Anonymous #superbat #batman #superman #prompt fill #my writing #clark kent #bruce wayne #angst #hurt and comfort #kind of a drabble that turns into plot

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nyeonisparks · 4 years

Text

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST PT. 2

The grip on my throat was firm, breathing seemed out of the question. For once in my life, I was thankful for my uncanny strength. My hands instinctively clenched together, my body shifted on its own, I took a swing with enough intensity to at least get the man off of me. Blood gushed from my adversary. He covered his nose, his smirk never faltering. "You caught me off guard, normal people would instinctively grab their foes wrist, in hopes of them letting go."

"uck," I choked on my words, trying to breathe again. I staggered over to him, clearing my throat. He tilted his head to the side, glancing at me.

"Now, I'm gonna kick your smarmy little ass!" Stepping forward, I swung at him; however, he dogged my attack with incredible speed.

"And why do I need my ass kicked? You were the one who came into my home," He was right, I loathe violence, yet here I am, using it on someone who was just defending their own space. "Hehe, and you said I was the monster, but look at you, hurting an innocent man" no, he's wrong, I was defending myself, he was at my throat.

His eyes looked at me in a way no village had. There was no anger, no hate, no fear. For someone that had just gotten their nose punched in, he didn't seem too frightened of me. "Look, I'm sorry for intruding, I was just trying to escape the storm, and I'm also sorry for calling you a monster," I know how much it hurts to be called a monster too. He didn't say anything, it was almost like he had lost all interest in me. "Is your nose okay?" Even though I didn't start the fight, I felt guilty.

"I'm fine, you can leave now" His tone was bitter, he had turned his back on me,

"Sorry to be a bother but, I have no place to go," I had to swallow my pride and think rationally.

"That's not my problem," anger arose in me, but I held it back.

"Please, can you help me" He looked over his shoulder at me, his nose bleeding at the bridge, my knuckles had scraped off the skin. I felt judged by his eyes. He turned to face me again, walking closer, I was on guard this time, no way was I gonna fall for the same trick twice.

"Beg"

"Excuse me, I don't think I heard you right" I hope to god I didn't hear him right.

"Get on your knees, and beg," His voice was rigid, yet he wore a smile.

"No way in hell am I doing that!"

"Then leave, get eaten by wolves, starve to death for all I care," He shrugged his shoulders. I knew if worse came to worse, I could always go back to the village; however, I had abandoned my friends, I wouldn't be able to face them again, I would be too ashamed. I knelt down,

"Please... Please let me stay," I looked up for his approval. He seemed pleased.

"Good boy" It was faint, but I heard him loud and clear before I could protest, he spoke, "You can stay for the night."

"For tonight!" I shouted, "I have nowhere to go, what am I supposed to do tomorrow!?" He laughed

"Beg again," a low growl escaped me. Of course, the one place I stumbled upon had a sadist living in it with horns and goat feet, who is so kind as to let me stay one night, after begging. What is he, the devil's spawn? Or is he the devil himself?

"I'm Heiwajima Shizuo, I used to live in a village not far from here."

"What caused you to be thrown onto my doorstep?" the man asked.

I sighed,

"I have unnatural strength, when I was younger, I ran around destroying anything that pissed me off or using it to fight anyone who pissed me off" I inhaled deeply before I continued, letting my nerves cool down. "Then I met Tom-san, he was always so kind to me, he helped me pick up some tricks to calm me down, although he would get bullied by the other kids, so I beat them up. Now that we're older, it seems like all the villagers hate Tom just for being around me, I can't be a burden to him any longer." The man nodded along.

"So, you want to become my burden instead?"

"WHY ARE YOU SUCH AN ASSHOLE!!" He shrugged

"I'm Orihara Izaya," His Arm stretched out, claws emerging like daggers.

"Oh, uh, nice to meet you" Izaya cupped my hand with both of his,

"Will you join me for dinner, I want to hear more about this power of yours" He tilted his hand with a smile. I

Nodded,

Izaya pointed up the stairs, I turned towards the direction. "There is a room on the left, have Saki take you there, I have work to do."

"Work, what kind o-"when I turned to face him, he was already gone.

I trudged up the long staircase, Izaya had descended from. His candelabra sat on the thick corner of the railing. I grasped the light source in my hand

"Ahh, not so hard!" it screeched, startling me. I looked more closely at the candelabra; the design was a girl holding the candles. "Your grip is too tight," she said.

"Oh, sorry," I loosen my hand a bit, "Is that better?"

"Yes, thank you, I'm Saki, by the way," So this was what Saki Izaya had mentioned. I introduced myself and asked about a room Izaya had told me about. Saki was happy to guide me down the dark hallway. With Saki by my side, the darkness shewed away.

"Do you know why the mirrors are smashed?" I asked,

"I can't say for sure," she smiled, but her eyes clouded with sadness. "Izaya-san must be happy you're here."

"Tsk, I don't think so, he told me I can only stay for tonight," Saki giggled, but didn't say anything else. "Why do you think he's happy I'm here?"

"He's lonely," She said,

At the end of the hallway stood a large wooden door, elegant designs were carved so nicely into the wood. A silver handle was dusted over. I opened the door, stepping into the room. A bed layout in front of me. It looked so cozy, and I was so tired. Even though I wanted to give in to sleep, I couldn't. Izaya had invited me for dinner, I didn't give a verbal response, but I had nodded in agreement.

"Dinner won't be ready for a while," Saki informed me.

"What am I supposed to do until then?"

"Read something, that's what I see Izaya-san do all the time."

"I don't know how... to read," I felt embarrassed, my face flushed, and I set Saki down on a nightstand.

"That's okay, Izaya-san can teach you" The thought of that left a bad taste in my mouth. There just is something off with this guy. I don't like him. I laid down in the bed, letting my limbs seek into the plush. Saki watched me from the nightstand. What am I supposed to do? I feel so trapped. Some time had passed, Saki told me to get changed into something more presentable for dinner. I did as I was told, in the room stood a wardrobe. I quickly changed, discarding my old rags for soft silks—a white button-down, with a black and red vest, and complementary slacks. Saki escorted me to the Dinner room. But it was more like me accompanying her as she told me directions. I was guided into a well-lit room, with a full dining table filled with food. Izaya sat at the head of the table. I seated myself beside him, setting Saki down on the table, Izaya glanced at her, and she did her best nod, then descended from the table with the help of a chair. Now it was just Izaya and me alone.

I served myself a plate of food and started eating, I didn't notice how starved I was. Izaya watched me scarf down my meal, not even touching his.

"Aren't you going to eat?" I asked

"I much rather watch you" Tremors ran down my spine, I shivered at these words. Why was this guy so weird? His claws tapped in a rhythm on the tabletop. I watched them intently, they looked trimmed and clean. "Do you like them?" His voice caught me off guard, and I quickly turned away.

"oh, uh, sorry, I didn't notice.." I trailed off, facing my attention towards him as he pulled on my hand,

"You can touch them if you want," he said. I took his hand into my own. Rubbing my thumb over his smooth nails. Their deep black color didn't stop at the nail, the darkness traveled till the bend of his fingers. As I kept looking, I noticed feathers prickled out at his wrist. His long sleeves encased the rest of his arm, but my curiosity made me long to see how far up his arm the feathers ran.

"They're pretty," I admitted. Izaya's beaming smile wasn't unusual, but what surprised me was when he rose from his chair and gripped the back of mine. "You know..." he lifted my chin up, enticing me with his somber eyes. "You're not so bad yourself," he purred, he was so close to me. My cheeks heated and I looked away,

"W-what are you doing" my voice was uneasy. Suddenly Tom's words came flooding back to me,

"until he became aware of his selfishness."

"Do you think I'm a fool.." my attention shifted to my lap, blonde lockes covering my heated face. I could feel him trying to tilt my head back towards him. Even though he’d lose this battle. He hummed "What do you mean?"

"Don't play dumb with me, I get it now, why you let me stay, why you had me come to dinner, and why you're trying to kiss me… you think the curse will be lifted by a kiss? You really are selfish" The air went stiff. Pulling away he hissed out,

"How predictable," bearing a pained expression, eyes glaring into me, it was clear that my predictions were right, he only gave me the option of staying here so he could use me to break his curse. He couldn't defend his actions from the truth. "Why did you have to come here, did she bring you here out of spite?" I could hear the gritting out his teeth,

"What? Who are you talking about?"

"The fairy" I watched him dip his claws into his wine glass, his features faded back into his smug smirk. A swift motion of his hand that had been dipped into the wine sliced at my chest, I was quick to back up, my chair getting knocked over in the process; however it had already been too late, a wound started spewing blood from my chest. "Now, you will be staying here with me," I was frozen. "Did you think I came unprepared? Obviously, there was a chance you would figure out my plan, it wasn't a very elaborate one" He snickered, "So I had a backup, what was in my glass wasn't wine, it was poison, I had one of my servants make it for me. It’s a slow working poison, so it won’t become deadly for about a week or two."

"What the hell!" I shouted

"Don't worry, there's an antidote, but you’ll only get it if you help lift the curse. However, if you don't lift it in time, you will end up like the rest of the unfortunate,in a ditch, dead." He cackled out, "Isn't this fun?"

"I shouldn’t have left the village” The realization hitting me too late, I had let myself get poisoned.

This wasn’t my original idea, I was inspired by a post @shizaya-incorrectquotes reposted. I’m pretty sure the creator of this writing prompt was @whowhatmeow

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no-no-notorious-writes · 5 years

Text

Padiddle - t.h.

Pairing: Tom Holland x reader

Summary: Driving back from a party, you can’t help but start an American game teenagers play with Tom.

Word Count: 3,807

Warnings: getting undressed in a car, friends-to-lovers, fluffiness

A/N: A padiddle is a car with only one headlight. We played padiddle in high school a lot. Even though there was plenty to do around where we lived, no one ever had enough money and it was honestly, just more fun to drive around with your friends.

Padiddle

“PADIDDLE!” you shouted, over Tom’s obvious groan. How were you spotting them before him? He was driving. “That’s another article of clothing, Tommy boy,” you grinned.

You and Tom had been driving back from some friends’ engagement party. Tom had been so excited to get there and spend time with the friends he hadn’t seen in awhile. It was a beautiful fall afternoon as you gathered at the soon-to-be-bride’s family home. You both ate finger sandwiches, celebrated with the champagne toast, talked to friends, but more importantly, you two giggled like the children you always were at these types of parties.

It only took one event like this for you to realize that while Tom was so excited for his friends and family to be moving onto the next stage in their lives, he couldn’t help feeling a little farther behind. He had focused so heavily on his career that he had sort of forgotten to hit all the other milestones – to fall in love. You could see the sadness, regret, and smallest tinge of jealousy in his eyes at that first engagement party for his cousin that you attended with him. It was easy for you to understand what was happening. He was comparing.

You quickly made it your job to get Tom to forget about the reason for the party and just have fun. At that first party, the soon-to-be-groom’s grandmother had gotten quite drunk and began to ask the young men to dance. Tom was almost one of her victims before you wriggled in impossibly close to him and placed your hand on his chest. He was a bit taken aback but fell in with your ruse quickly. His hand gripped your waist and he planted a sweet kiss on the top of your head. After some friendly, albeit tight-lipped conversation with the old bird, she finally set her sights on another young man across the room.

The two of you stood on the edge of the party watching it from the outside. You had made a joke about a portly man whose wife kept stealing the hors d'oeuvres on his plate when he wasn’t looking. Then Tom chimed in creating a story about the couple, which made you break out into a full belly laugh. You each had taken turns the rest of the night making up lives for the people in his cousin’s fiancé’s family.

That’s why you were in the passenger seat tonight giggling while you watch Tom try to slide his boots off quickly at a red light. Honestly, it couldn’t have been a more perfect night to play the American game on the British roadways. You each had multiple layers on, having dressed for the cool breeze of fall (plenty for you each to shed along the long drive home). Tom had looked incredible when he picked you up earlier that day, so much so that you felt like you had under dressed in just a blouse and slacks. But he assured you that you looked perfect and chic (his words, not yours).

Your heels were in a heap in the footwell of the passenger seat having been one of the first items you pulled off in the heat of the game. The only items you had to remove so far were your shoes and the sweater you had thrown on in case it was cold. Tom, however, was down to his socks, white undershirt, and his trousers.

“Would you honestly just drive around and look for cars with missing headlights?” Tom asked incredulous.

“Yes, Tom, we really did,” you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Why on Earth?”

“Well, let's see. You’re a teenager. You’re not allowed to drink. You don’t have a lot of cash. But you have the car for the night. So you all get in the car thinking that you’ll figure it out once you start driving but then someone sees a car with one headlight out and the game has started. You can’t just not finish it,” you explained.

“Americans really do have the strangest customs,” he said, putting on his turn signal.

You and Tom had met by chance as you studied abroad in London during your junior year of college. Tom had just recently found out that he had gotten the role of Spiderman. He and Harrison were planning a night of celebrating as they walked into the corner coffee shop. You were working on a paper, trying to get away from your roommate, who liked to entertain the gentlemen regularly. You had stumbled on this place a few weeks before and it had become a habit to work here when you couldn’t work in your room. You had loved everything about this place. It felt cozy, with a warm fire going on those cold, sodden London afternoons. The barista was sweet and always gave you a friendly smile. There was a constant stream of patrons, but it never felt like anyone was rushing to leave.

On this particular day, you had snagged one of the squashy armchairs right by the fireplace. You pulled your laptop out and placed it on the arm of the chair and began to read through what you had already written.

Around your second latte, Tom and Harrison had entered, laughing and planning in hushed voices. You had caught Harrison’s eye, though. (He would later tell you that he had been really drawn in by the studious look at that time.) You could feel eyes on you from behind. And as you turned around to confirm your suspicions, you locked eyes with Harrison. He gave you a knowing smirk. You could feel the light blush creep onto your cheeks as you smiled sweetly and turned back to your laptop.

When it came time for the boys to find a seat, Harrison pushed Tom to sit in the armchair across from you, while Harrison turned a chair around and leaned on the back to talk with him. They continued their conversation in private tones, not wanting to mention the M word or the S word. You would glance up periodically and catch one of their eyes. Tom would give you that award-winning smile you’ve grown to love so much. While Harrison looked at you like a piece of meat he was ready to devour.

“Well if you can’t decide, why don’t you ask where this beautiful girl would go on a Friday night and then we’ll know the best place to go,” Harrison said, trying to pull you into the conversation.

You tried desperately to ignore them. You were not studying in London to meet boys. Granted their accents did drive you crazy. And they were two of the cutest boys you had seen yet. But then Tom tried his hand at getting your attention.

“Excuse me, sweetheart,” he asked. You finally looked up and met the most beautiful chocolate brown eyes you’d ever seen. “Hi. I’m Tom and this my mate, Harrison.”

“We were just wondering, where a beautiful girl like yourself would head to have a good time on a Friday night?” Harrison asked.

“Um, I uh– I haven’t been here long,” you started.

“An American!” Harrison exclaimed.

“Uh, yeah, I’m here for school,” you said, looking back down at the book in your lap. “I haven’t really been out anywhere. I haven’t made many friends yet,” you blushed.

“Well, darling, we’ll be your friends,” Tom said, reaching forward to touch your knee.

That was the moment when your whole life changed. Harrison quickly realized that you weren’t his type, and that you were better as friends. But had you not met Tom and Harrison, you never would have asked for an extension on your studies. You never would have applied for those jobs in London. And you certainly never would have moved in with Harrison when you needed somewhere to live. It wasn’t the ideal situation, but you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

So when Tom and Harrison left again and again as Tom’s fame grew, they kept in constant contact – texting, FaceTime, and these videos Harrison would take of Tom when he wasn’t looking. You sort of felt silly when they both flew to the States for months at a time to film and yet here you were an expat in their country, alone. You shouldn’t say alone. Nikki Holland quickly took you under her wing the first time you were ill and Tom and Harrison had no idea what to do.

“PADIDDLE!” you heard the Brit yell, as you cursed under your breath. You were trying to find the playlist you had of the music you listened to when you were in high school; with your eyes otherwise occupied, you gave Tom the edge.

“What should I take off?” you asked, innocently. You could admit that you might have been trying to get a rise out of him.

Tom could feel the lump in his throat as he tried to swallow. He had never thought he would hear you say that. Unlike Harrison, Tom’s feelings grew for you as the years passed. He was enamored with you. Every moment that you curled into him earlier that night, your warm body pressing against his, your giggle in his ear, your kiss on his cheek, was like that perfect mix of the best thing ever and torture.

“Uh– the blouse,” Tom said, trying to regain the air in his lungs.

You made quick work of the buttons and pulled the article of clothing over your head. You threw it behind you where both of your clothes littered the back seat and floor. Had anyone seen that, they would have thought something else was happening.

Finally you found your playlist and turned it on, letting the music flow through the car’s speakers. You belted out every word to every song – singing into your fake microphone, the car as your stage and Tom as your captivated audience. It was hard to concentrate on the road when you were in front of him, topless and singing to him like he was the only man you could ever want.

“PADIDDLE” you screeched, as you pointed past Tom to his right.

“Oh, come on, darlin’, I never would have seen that one!” Tom whined.

“Too bad, Tommy!” you cackled. “Lose the shirt, movie star.”

At the next red light, Tom pulled his shirt over his head in one swift and easy movement. It was hard to pull your eyes away from Tom’s toned chest and defined abs. You were already struggling to not focus entirely on the way his biceps had been straining against the white t-shirt he had been wearing. You gave yourself exactly the amount of time it took Tom to pull his shirt over his head to rake your eyes down his body. It certainly wasn’t long enough, in your opinion.

You both had tried not to look over at the car next to you when you pulled up to a red light. It was better to not draw attention to the fact that you both were half-naked (or maybe they would think you were totally naked) driving around. But curiosity got the better of both of you and you peaked to see the older woman in the red sedan next to you looking appalled. The light quickly turned green and Tom hit the gas as you both snickered, the snicker turning into big belly laughs.

“Oh my God, my song!” You threw your hand across the center console and grabbed Tom’s thigh, as you turned up the volume on the stereo.

You hadn’t really meant to do it, but now your hand was there and neither of you were going to say anything about it. Tom tried not to think about how your fingers pressed into the flesh under his trousers. He willed away the pink rolling up his neck and onto his cheeks. He tried not to let his body react to the heat coming from your hand. Meanwhile, you belted out the lyrics to your favorite song when you were in high school. You could feel Tom’s muscles flex under your hand; you squeezed his thigh as the chorus came up and you sang louder, as if that would take away the red on your cheeks and the fact that you were clenching your own thighs together.

When the song was over, you pulled your hand off Tom’s leg and turned the volume back down to a respectable level. You closed your eyes for a second, remembering what it was like to be young, carefree, and so touch-starved that you happily played the game, hoping someone would see a little bit of skin and think of you in that way.

“PADIDDLE” Tom whispered in your ear.

“Fuck,” you breathed. You undid your slacks and slid them down your legs, thankful that you had shaved that morning.

Tom struggled to keep his eyes on the road, as every inch of your legs were revealed. He could barely focus with your long, toned legs on display; he was pretty sure he would die if he actually looked at the black lace panties you were wearing.

You’re eyes were on the prize, because there was no way you could look at Tom now. God, why did you start this? You forgot that you were never really that great at this game. Your reaction time was always just a little bit slower. When you were in a car full of people, it didn’t matter too much; there was always someone slower than you.

You hunched forward as if getting closer to the windows would give you a better view. You scanned the roads and all the cross streets. You even looked down roads as you drove past them, hoping to see one hidden in plain view. But nothing. You could feel eyes on you, though.

“Eyes on the road, Thomas.”

Tom cleared his throat and responded with a smile on his lips, “I don’t know what you mean, love.”

The silence was deafening. The air was thick and hot. And neither of you could quite look the other in the eye. That didn’t mean you weren’t sneaking glances at each other, though.

“Did you ever think that we would be half-naked in your car together?” Immediately after it left your mouth, you regretted it. “I– uh– you know what, don’t answer that.”

Tom chuckled, “No, darlin’, never in my wildest dreams did I imagine this.” Tom paused thinking of his words carefully, “But if I had, I don’t think I would have come up with this scenario.”

Was that an admission? Does that mean that he had thought of you in that way before? It couldn’t be. He said he had never thought of you, even in his wildest dreams. Right?

Tom wanted so badly to reach over and touch you. He didn’t even want it to be in a sexual way. He would have been totally content holding your hand or pushing hair behind your ear. But friends don’t do that. He had to constantly remind himself of the context of your relationship on the nights where you leaned back against his chest, his arm wrapped around you to watch a movie. You both seemed to do a lot of things that friends didn’t normally do. Friends don’t get undressed in each other’s cars.

It had taken a while for Tom to realize the gradual change that occurred. But it seemed like either the two of you had grown too comfortable with one another or at least one of you wanted more. Tom knew that he did. But did you? After tonight, it certainly felt like you did. You were always touching him, and when he went to put an arm around you, you had snuggled in close like you do when your trying to help him lose an unwanted lady friend. The two of you knew nearly everyone there, though; you didn’t really have to try to save him from anyone.

“You know, it’s not the worst place to be, though,” Tom added, looking in your direction.

You ventured a glance toward Tom, not fully bringing your eyes to his. You didn’t really want to see what was there. But you gave a small smile, hoping that he meant it as a compliment. Honestly, you wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.

Tom reached over for your hand, lacing your fingers together. He rubbed small circles over the sensitive skin between your thumb and forefinger. “Did I thank you for coming with me tonight?”

“Oh, Tommy, you don’t have to do that,” you said, giving his hand a gentle squeeze.

You looked at his hand in yours. His hand was strong, but it held yours so softly. You could remember the feeling of his hand resting gently on your hip that night. You knew that you were getting a little too touchy than you should have been. Being near Tom, feeling the warmth of his body pressed up against yours, taking in the scent that you could only explain as perfectly Tom, it all made you so crazy. You just wanted a memory, a soft feeling, to take back to your bed at night when he was back filming.

“No, darlin’, I don’t think you know how lucky I am to have a date like you,” Tom said gently. “I get to spend the night with this absolutely gorgeous woman on my arm. And not only is she always the most beautiful woman in the room, she is the smartest, kindest, funniest one in the room. That makes me the luckiest guy in the room by default.”

“Tom, I–” How do you respond to that? How do you tell Tom everything that he meant to you? Is this the moment that you have been waiting to present itself. Trying to find the words proved harder than you thought – that was until you saw it just beyond the next traffic light. “PADIDDLE,” you shouted.

“Oh, God,” Tom threw his hand up and shook his head. He pulled his trousers off and tossed them behind him, leaving him in his Calvin Klein briefs.

You had about fifteen minutes until you were home and you were tied in the game, but the thick tension in the car was not from the competition. Tom had just called you gorgeous and your head was swimming, because he was sitting right there in his underwear and socks and you could reach right over and touch him.

But wouldn’t that be crossing a line? Had it already been crossed? Was it so blurry that you can’t even see the line any longer? When had going to parties as friends and meeting for coffee become cuddling on the couch watching movies and being each others’ dates for major life events? Haven’t you both been crossing the line for years now?

You looked over to take in Tom’s profile. This wasn’t the first time you were seeing it, but maybe it was the first time you were in the position to make a decision, a major decision, which could change everything. You looked over at Tom’s thigh, the pale, creamy flesh; suddenly the only thing you wanted to do was touch it – lines be damned.

Snaking your hand over the center console, this time it wasn’t a mistake. You lightly placed your hand on Tom’s leg letting it rest just below his briefs. Tom jumped a bit and his muscles tensed under your hand. What were you doing? You both were wondering. You let your fingers skim the soft, sensitive skin of his inner thigh, while your thumb rubbed slow circles where it rested.

Finally, you let your eyes meet his. You could see the questions you didn’t know if you could answer. But a shy smile crossed your lips, hoping to tell him that the ball was back in his court.

As Tom pulled up in front of your building, you quickly pulled your hand away, suddenly worried that you had made a mess of everything. You turned toward Tom and stuck your hand out. Desperate to ignore the mistake you had made.

“Hard fought match, Holland. Draw?”

“Draw,” he copied.

You each pulled your clothes back on, laughing at how silly the whole thing was. You each didn’t bother to put yourselves back together fully – tucking in shirts, buttoning every button, tugging on sweaters, tying shoes. Tom walked you up to your apartment and stood rocking on his feet as you unlocked the door.

“Thanks for tonight,” you said opening your front door. “For going along with my silliness. I enjoyed the nostalgia.”

Tom followed you inside your apartment and closed the door behind him. You tossed your keys on the table by the door and dropped your purse and sweater on a nearby chair.

“Another perk of being your friend – it’s never boring.”

Friend? When had you fallen from best friend status? Oh right, when you let your fingers caress his inner thigh.

You forced a laugh, “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

“Always good.”

You each looked at the floor, wondering what to say next. This had never happened before. Internally, you were panicking that this was going to be the end. This would be the last time you heard from Tom. When Harrison would suggest inviting you to something, he’d probably explain how strange you’d become that one night and how he couldn’t bare to see you again.

“Y/N,” Tom never called you by your name. He always had a term of endearment to call you. Hearing it on his tongue sent a shiver down your spine. “I– uh–”

“Tom, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that… back there… in the car.” The words rushed together and the internal panic began to seep out.

“No, let me finish,” he shook his head. “Those things I said, I meant them. You are incredible. You make my heart race and every touch sets my skin on fire.” He took a few steps closer toward you. “And after tonight, I don’t think we can go back to the way that we were.”

“What do you–”

Tom quickly wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into him. “Y/N, I’m totally smitten with you. I have been for three years now,” he said softly, your faces only inches apart.

“Tom, I–” you started. “I am so glad I started that stupid game,” you smiled.

Tom took that as his queue to lean in and capture your lips in a sweet, soft kiss. The tension seemed to melt out of both of you. You silently thanked the stupid things American teenagers came up with to pass the time.

#tom holland #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland scenario #tom holland scenarios #tom holland imagine #tom holland imagines #tom holland fluff #tom holland fic #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland one-shot

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maruzzewrites · 5 years

Note

״ It’s okay to love me. Please love me.” With Doppio? Or if you only do la squadra, “I want to tell you I love you until my throat bleeds.” for risotto? LOVE your writing!

sweet sweet doppio not being so sweet. as i said, i see him being incredibly moody when yandere and we all know he has nasty outbursts when angery.

also i did that prompt with risotto! here you go, anon.

46. “It’s okay to love me. Please love me.”

Content warnings: yandere content, obsessive content, stalking, violence, creep behavior, implied kidnapping.

Doppio, right under the Don in Passione’s hierarchy,was a simple man. He woke up in unknown rooms every morning, he found himself outsideisolated buildings every afternoon, he wore oversized outfits every evening;despite his frequent gaps and voids in his memory, Doppio was a simple man who wastoo polite, too nice to be considered the right-hand man of one of the most monstrousbosses of Italy’s criminal life. He was shy, he was clumsy, he would extend ahelping hand to all the people who needed it while risking being tricked atevery interaction.

It was because of his naivety that you met him, whilsthe was almost robbed by a tiny child in front of him, sliding his small hand intohis bag after asking him for some trivial information. You stopped the scoundrel,holding his wrist while lecturing him about legality and rules, missing thetwitch in Doppio’s golden eyes as they shifted from their previous color. Thechild almost started to cry, and you couldn’t bear to see the sadness,crunching down to offer a few bills to him and making him promise to be good.The kid grabbed the money, surprised, and run off while yelling his gratitude,disappearing in a shop somewhere down the street.

“Do you have everything?” Doppio jumped out of hisskin when you addressed him, looking at your face as your words registered inhis mind. Then, he showed you a face of realization and searched his bag, hispockets, he looked in places he wouldn’t be able to store anything; he gained ashort snicker from you, without any malice, by the eagerness to answer yourquestion, and the sound attracted his attention to your face again. He justconfirmed nothing was stolen.

“Be more careful.” That was all you said to himbefore walking away and leaving him behind, disappearing in the ever-changingsea of people that walked the streets of Naples. He was too astonished to runafter you, losing you in the crowd after he regained his mind and hisconsciousness. His steps were quick, panicked as he looked and looked, the tinyside streets mocking him as he thought about the path you could have taken. Hissearch was interrupted by a call, and he reluctantly answered his boss whilewalking the opposite direction from you.

However, Doppio wasn’t stupid. He was aware thatmost people, people not like him, were creatures of habit. Or bound to routinesthey had to keep, in order to maintain their lives. So, he waited, every day,at the same exact hour in the same exact spot. He scanned his surrounding withuncharacteristic attention to catch a glimpse of you – he committed to memoryyour face, making space in his faulty brain to remember you. His eyes woulddart from person to person, maniacally, flashing green in their golden wake.His boss knew what he was doing, and tried to persuade him to stop and go backto his duties.

“Just a thank you, just a thank you.” Doppiowould chant to himself, silencing the voice of the Don while he simply sighedand allowed him to seek you out. He knew nothing pressing was going to happen,he was aware Doppio would run to do anything for him if it was needed, so hesimply observed as he analyzed and hunted for your form in the mass of bodiesin front of him. The distraction of wanting to find you could prove dangerouson missions and tasks, so the Don would let him find you, guide him until hisfascination would wear out and he could continue with his plans withoutsetbacks.

The pursuit came to an end one day, when Doppio’sgaze rested on your back. He gasped loudly, fell as he tried to run towardsyou, letting out a loud scream of shock. You turned around to see what thenoise was, seeing him just before his face collided with the ground with apainful sound. You winced slightly, then moved to approach the man laying onthe floor, immobile. You rested your hands on his shoulders and watched him flinchat the contact, sighing with relief at the sight, before turning him around.His nose was bleeding and his cheek was bruising, but his eyes were still openand they moved to meet your gaze as soon as you entered his field of vision.

“Are you okay?” Doppio nodded at your questionand you took a minute to look over his face, ghosting your fingers over hisnose and cheek, without pressing down to prevent any type of pain. He blinked,looking up at your concerned face, a swirl of emotions taking over his body:apprehension, anxiety, caution, they would mix with a pleasant sensation offondness at your gentle eyes caressing his injuries. You sneaked an arm underhis head, making him sit up and then get back on his feet with a hand securedon his side, making the uncovered skin of his torso heat up at the contact. Youspoke again when you distanced yourself, his arms mechanically reaching out tostop you, “Let’s sit down somewhere, so I can clean you up.”

Doppio followed you, obedient, letting himself beingpushed on a chair of a cafe, you disappearing inside to order something afteryou got his preferences. You didn’t give him the possibility to pay, sittingdown at his side as the two of you waited for your drinks. You moved your ownchair closer, your knee brushing his thigh as you took his face in your hands, checkingto make sure nothing too bad happened. With a tissue, the blood was cleaned;the bruise over his soft skin was soothed with a cream you had with you, theexcuse of having a nurse as a parent on your lips even when he didn’t questionyour action. He was simple enchanted, speaking eagerly when you asked questions,averting his eyes with joyful embarrassment when you chucked at his attics.

You were strangely cheerful in his presence, hewas so used to hiding he forgot the pleasure of someone’s company. He was,after all, a simple man; as such, he craved the proximity of other people, andyour good heart was warming him up to the point his words came out rushed,awkward, but you simply giggled at his bashful behavior. His mind would growhazy at your displays of kindness, used as he was to criminals and ruffiansready to take advantage of his smaller size and innocent face.

When he asked what you bought as a pastry, youdidn’t think twice about offering him a piece, compensating with a mirthfultheft of a part of his own food. When he winced a bit as he touched his owncheek, you got up to ask for ice to the worker of the cafe, pressing it gentlyto his face while continuing to chat about nothing in particular. When youreyebrows twitched only a little in a frown before your forehead easing up afterhis boss called him, a duty he couldn’t avoid or ignore. He apologized,bringing his phone to his ear to listen, while his eyes were still on yourface.

There weren’t orders, just questions. The bosswas calm with him, but the impatience in his voice was evident; he could evensee your expression change, worry painted over your features as you probablyheard the tone through the speaker. The man on the other side of the phonedemanded to know why he was still around you, sending Doppio in a confusedstate of panic. The boss continued to order him to stand up, walk away, he didn’thave time for conversations; Doppio raised his voice to speak, begging for himto listen. The harsh voice of his boss was silenced, and Doppio swallowed atthe sight of your disturbed face just before asking the Don if it was okay to haveyou.

He saw you freeze in your seat, your arms shot upto grip the table right in front of you, as you glared at him with agitated eyes.A heavy silence fell over the two of you, the evening coming and leaving thestreets still, empty, lifeless. The few people who passed didn’t reassure you,not with the deranged look on the man in front of you. You were alreadycollecting your thoughts in order to find the easiest, quickest escape route ifthings got worse. Doppio, meanwhile, was waiting for an answer, his breathpicking up with each passing second with your eyes darting in all directionsand his fingers tapping nervously on the table.

“You can.” The definitive response sent a shockof delight through Doppio’s body, his face splitting into a grin. He watchedyou, even more worried now, as he reported the good news to you and he lingeredwith his gaze to gather your reaction. You were confused, but elected to simplystand up and say your goodbyes, reminding him he didn’t have to pay. Youstarted to walk away when you heard a chair move, his desperate pleading rightbehind you followed by quick, abrupt steps. Your legs felt heavy as you startedto walk faster and faster, until you began to job and ultimately run with youreyes fixed in front of you. His words behind you didn’t stop, his begging onlysound closer than ever, until the words started to change and mutate into severecommands to stop.

Your error was taking a turn, slowing down toprevent the possibility of slipping, but then you felt two arms around yourstomach. They felt too big to be of the man you were with before, and you werelifted without too much thought, your body trashing to get out of the hold hewas squeezing you in. As if your prayers were answered by the wrong divinity,you were thrown on the ground, your legs and hands aching as the crashed downand gave out under your weight. You felt a foot press down on your back, untilyou were flat on the floor and Doppio was towering over you with ragged breath andharsh words, “Didn’t you hear? He said it’s okay!”

Suddenly you were faced with the phone Doppio wasusing earlier, pressed on your ear while you listened to the silence on theother side. Doppio’s voice returned to his previous softness, now strained withnotes of desperation that made him shrill at certain points, making you wince, “It’sokay to love me,” you chocked as he pushed you down with his foot, your lungs startingto feel crushed under his weight and the pressure of the floor right under you.You let out a cry, wriggling until you could feel your ribs scrap at the fleshof your chest. The despair clinging to his throat contrasted with his violentoutburst, his voice ringing painfully in your ears, “Please love me. You weredoing good! He approves.”

When you started to cry, you felt the foot leaveyour back and you were moved to lay on your back, feeling the cold shadow ofthe man despite your closed eyes. You tried to sit up, your palms burning atevery movement with the ache of open injuries, but a hand went to your throatand you were pushed down with violent rush, the back of your head throbbing asit hit the ground. Your vision blurred, your mind floated before turning off,but you could swear Doppio’s eyes were a different color.

#jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #vinegar doppio #doppio x reader #yandere #yandere x reader #there is some diavolo but doppio is the focus #can you imagine doppio starting to become swole bc of diavolo's body? he would look like those natsuki pics of her being ripped af #Anonymous

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pussy-puncher · 5 years

Text

Up In Flames

Pairing: Past Natasha Romanoff x reader, some platonic Clint Barton x reader

Word Count: 1.4k+

Warnings: Fire, mentions of violent acts, mentions of major character death (Natasha's), angst, alcohol.

A/N: This is really bad lmao. Anyway it takes place after Endgame, and sadly Natasha and Tony are, in fact, dead in this fic. So sorry. But I was feeling angsty.

Mentioned song: Severed by The Decemberists

November 25, 2027.

You watch as the flames go up. The building burning along with everything and everyone inside of it. A small malevolent smile grazes your lips hearing the screams over 'Severed' by The Decemberists playing through your earbuds.

You laugh but you don't feel anything more than a slight twang of happiness, but it soon disappears. This would happen anytime you smiled or tried to be happy.

Your eyes watch and analyze every detail of the bright massacre happening before you. All if the mayhem being your doing. The red and orange fire reminding you of her.

Her fiery red hair, unmatched attitude and confident spirit. She somewhat always had the upper hand in any situation, and if, somehow she lost it, she could quickly regain control a simple charming smile. She had that kind of power over people. She could sell ice to and eskimo. She was just that charming and persuasive.

You missed her.

You missed the way she held your hand. How she held you close to her at night. The way she looked at you with nothing but love and happiness in her eyes. Or when she would get on her tiptoes and kiss your throat, because she was too short to reach anything higher up without your help. The way you could so easily pick her up. Or when she would hug you from behind and kisses your shoulder blades.

You missed everything about her.

Her green eyes that always showed such softness towards you. Her crooked teeth that she hated more than anything. The twitch of her lips indicating a soft smile and the way her eyes twinkled when she did this. Her soft, naturally red hair that she changed so often you lost count over the years. Her incredibly soft and pale skin that you always wanted to touch. All of her little freckles and moles that you had memorized. Her perfect body, that you swore up and down was sculpted by the gods above and Michelangelo himself. Her beautiful angelic laugh that could make you smile no matter what. Her somewhat dark and cruel sense of humor you found funny regardless of what she said.

You miss every little detail about her.

But she's gone now. You keep telling yourself that, in hopes that maybe one day you'll realize it's true.

You didn't realize that someone was behind you until they got close. You let them. Not caring if they were there to kill you or hurt you. You wouldn't feel it and you wouldn't care. You'd probably thank them.

They put their hand on your shoulder to turn you around. You see Clint standing there. He gives you a sad look and you know what's going to happen next.

×××

You sit in a chair at Clint's dinning room table with your arms crossed over your chest. He gives you a disappointed look. But he knows why you're doing this, going around causing havoc.

Because you miss her.

"You do realize I could lose my job if they find out in helping you, right? I could lose everything!"

"Yeah, I know. But at least you have everything you've ever wanted! I got that all ripped away from me!"

He takes a deep breath and sighs, calming his nerves.

"I miss her too, Y/N. But you don't see me going around burning down buildings and killing innocent people in the process." He says, using the disappointed parent tone.

"No. Not like I do." You say quietly.

He frowns, "What do you mean 'not like I do'? She was my best friend–"

You cut him off, standing up and slamming your hands down on the table, your voice loud but fragile, "She was the love of my life. My everything. My whole world."

He looks at you, his expression still stern but one of concern, "I lost the love of my life and my family when the snap happened-"

You cut him off again, "Yeah, but you got it all back. I can never get her back." You hold back tears and sit down, staring at a spot on the table. "We were going to get married, start a family. Have a happy little life, like you and Laura do." You sniffle and swallow the lump in your throat, "The last thing I said to her was 'let's hope this works'. Not 'I love you' or 'you mean the world to me'. No. I said 'let's hope this works'."

Choking on a sob you barely manage to say, "It should have been you."

"I know." He says softly, knowing you didn't mean it. You just want to hurt him. Letting his tears fall he walks over to you and hugs you tightly, cradling you like a child.

×××

You sit alone in Clint's guest room, crying. No. Sobbing. Yeah. You are sobbing in the guest bedroom on the Barton household.

You can't stop thinking about her. About how she sacrificed herself to bring everyone back. How she left you alone. In a world without her. You didn't know how to live in this world without her so you just went off.

You would beat the shit out of anyone if the mentioned her. Especially by name. You couldn't bare to hear it.

It was like a dagger being shoved through your heart every time you heard it. It only got worse as time went on. As did your temper. You would snap at the tiniest of things.

She was your rock. She kept you strong but now...

Now it's like your rock has been thrown into a lake. With you still attached to it. It's dragging you down and you have to let go in order to survive.

But you're not sure if you want to survive without your rock. The world just looks so different now. She always made everything seem so much better than it actually was.

Your would went up in flames the moment she died four years ago. Everyone else got their family back. But you lost it. You lost everything so everyone else would be happy.

You sigh and wipe your face then get up. You can't just sit around anymore. You won't allow yourself to. You pull on your clothes and shoes then gather your remaining things and leave the Barton household.

You don't know where your going but your definitely not staying here. You grab Clint's truck keys on the way out, making sure to be quiet. You walk out to the truck, get in and start it. But you sit there a moment. Thinking. You sigh and begin to drive off to some currently undecided location.

You drive for hours on the highway. You don't know where your headed to. You just let your heart lead you to where ever it is. Hoping to find something new.

You pull over for the night and stay at a ratty, old motel. The bed has stains and stinks of body odor. You sleep on it anyway though you feel dirty and unsafe.

The next morning you don't bother to shower and go straight to check out then get back on the road.

You haven't eaten since Laura fed you yesterday afternoon. You don't normally eat breakfast so it's fine. But you'll have to find food eventually. You drive for about two hours when you have to stop for gas.

Your life goes on like this for about a year. Sleeping in old dirty motels, not having proper showers or proper food. You live on the road for some time.

Until one day you stop. You get out of the truck in the middle on the Nevada desert. The road stretching for miles. You can't see any form of life.

Your drunk. Very drunk. You start to sob and slide down the side of the truck, until your bottom hits the ground and you're sitting. You just cry.

You want your friends back. You want your family back. You want your old life back. Before everything got screwed. You know you will never get her back. But you can get the rest of your family back.

You stand up and take a deep breath. You pull a lighter from your jacket pocket and look at it. You light it and stare at the red flame.

You move a few steps away from the truck then walk back to it, you open the gas tank hatch and unscrew the top.

You take several steps back and aim for the small hole of the tank, then toss the lighter into the tank watching the truck go up in flames just like the life you once had.

You pull your cellphone from your back pocket and dial a familiar number.

"Hey.... I'm gonna need a ride, Fury."

#natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff drabble #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #black widow headcannons #black widow x you #black widow x y/n #black widow x reader #black widow #angst #avengers x platonic reader #avengers x fem!reader #avengers x you #avengers x reader #avengers #clint barton x reader #clint/natasha #clint barton

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taronunwin · 4 years

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Can you rate everything that Taron has been in from your most fave to least fave? And giving your reasonings why for each eating. I know this might be hard to do since all of his work has been exceptional. I’m asking just because I need more Taron content to watch!

OH GOODNESS. Anon, this is a bit cruel, like making me pick my favourite children. Except I have no children. And I do not like children. I digress. I’ll do my best.

I haven’t seen most of the voice projects Taron’s done so I’ll just list what I have seen and I’ll rank it by things I love/need to watch vs. things I’m okay with watching less often, sort of thing. This is mostly spoiler free but there are a few things that dance on the line. I’m sorry, but it’s really hard not to explain what I love without getting into that territory.

Deep breath. Here goes.

1: Rocketman

When I watched Rocketman for the first time, it was one of the last of Taron’s films I had yet to see because I was the least interested in it. I wasn’t an Elton fan, I don’t care for musicals usually, and I’m not really keen on movies set in the 60′s. So there were three strikes against it and I honestly expected just to start it, click through, and move on because Taron didn’t look hot (I thought then). But by the time he got to the ‘My name is Elton Hercules John’, I was invested. Wholeheartedly. Even when Taron wasn’t on screen, I cared deeply for the young Elton. I was rooting for him, grieving with him, and feeling his pain and triumphs. That movie is an experience unlike any other and by far the best movie I have ever seen in my life. The pure joy that radiates from it… it’s hard to explain.

2: Kingsman: The Secret Service

I’m not a Bond fan myself, I’m not really an action spy genre fan, so, again, I didn’t really think I was going to love this movie. But when Lee Unwin jumped on that grenade, I sat up in my seat a bit. That wasn’t the beginning I expected. And then when his son showed up later, stuck in a life that was so miserable and far from what he wanted, my heart broke. Eggsy had so much depth and went so far beyond just a ‘kid from the wrong side of the tracks’ kind of backstory. The details about him being in gymnastics and giving it up because his mum had married a good-for-nothing creep who influenced him more than he wanted to admit, being borderline brilliant and doing so well in school, only to give that up, too, because what was the freaking point in even trying when he was stuck in a world he wanted desperately out of. And then, when that opportunity presented itself and he was able to join the Marines, the first time in his life he really felt like he had some control and could follow in his dad’s footsteps, his mum wouldn’t allow it because she couldn’t bear the thought of losing him. So Eggsy was utterly stuck. Until…

3: Robin Hood

Oh, Robin. I think we all have a very special soft spot for the first character we fell for in an actor’s filmography and Robin is it for me. I had seen Testament of Youth in early 2019 with my teary eye on Kit Harington but I loved Edward. However I had no idea that Robin was Edward when I started watching, I just like historical movies and thought Robin Hood looked interesting. When I started, I was pretty smitten by Rob right away but as the movie progressed and the story got more convoluted, I became less interested and actually turned it off. But I couldn’t stop thinking about Robin. So I started watching it again and boy did I fall hard. The movie itself? A stupid, fun, absolutely enjoyable ride. Robin? Well, that beautiful boy is the love of my life.

4: Billionaire Boys Club

I’ve seen a lot of negative things about this film, not just in regards to a certain cast members, but in general and frankly? I don’t get it. I know I’m probably watching it through rose-coloured glasses but honestly, I really, genuinely love this movie. I love Dean’s charisma and charm, how much he loved Joe and wanted the best for him—for both of them. I love Dean’s darkness and how his character gradually yet drastically changed over the course of the film; how he started as just a passionate, excited, enthusiastic young man and ended in such a different place, even willing to give up something and someone that meant so much to him because desperation drove him to do something he would have never imagined himself doing in the beginning. I loved watching the relationships fray and bonds dissolve and I especially loved watching Taron play Dean’s darkness so realistically, paying special attention to how he portrayed Dean’s growing drug addiction. Also? Dean is really hot. There’s no way of sugarcoating that.

5: Kingsman: The Golden Circle

I love Eggsy Unwin. I mean I love him. Like I-would-take-a-bullet-for-him kind of love. And though the charm of the first movie being his transformation from street kid to Kingsman isn’t really in this film, it’s still such a fun ride. My favourite parts are mostly the quieter moments, the little scenes where we see Eggsy, less as a Kingsman and more as himself. His struggles, his doubts, the times where he’s shaken and isn’t really sure of anything anymore. But what I love about Eggsy is how fiercely he gets back up every time. Doesn’t matter what is thrown at him, he will take it all and become stronger.

Also… “Let’s make this fair,” Eggsy says, tucking his right arm behind his back and effectively evening the playing field with his one-armed opponent before he engages in a to-the-death brawl with the man he trained with until snapping his neck with one. hand. still. tucked. behind. his. back.

6: Testament of Youth

I hate this movie so much. But I also love this movie so much. Edward is one of the sweetest angels there ever was and I adore him with every fiber of my body. And watching his story… well… it makes me more unhappy than I’ve ever been. Does that stop me from watching it? No. But it does limit the number of rewatches. It’s one of those movies that’s so perfect for a sad mood. Like when I need a good cry, oh my goodness, I need look no further. But looking beyond just the emotional nature of the movie, Taron’s performance is so so beautiful. Watching Edward’s boyish innocence peeling away to show the more hardened, deeply hurt and disillusioned young man as the war’s grip on him tightens? Honestly, it’s stunning.

7: The Last of the Haussmans

A play? Really? What’s that doing on this list? Well, let me tell you. Taron’s character, Daniel, affected me very deeply and I’m not even being silly. This list is already too long so I’ll spare the details but Daniel… he got me. He’s such a sweetheart, so genuine and pure and good and earnest and wonderful and the kiss scene, well, I don’t even know how many times I’ve watched it. The tenderness he displays, the sweet uncertainty and awkwardness yet visibly bolstering himself so he can do what he’s so unsure about… oh, Daniel. For it being one of his first public roles, I am consistently amazed by how good Taron is. Daniel’s awkwardness does not feel like Taron’s discomfort. Daniel is entirely his own person with his own story and struggles and watching his story unfold is a really lovely thing.

8: Eddie the Eagle

This sweet, fun, encouraging, uplifting, charming movie, oh, how I love it. Though I have to be honest, it isn’t one of those movies I just need to watch like every month or two. I love enjoying it with other people and seeing their reactions but it’s not one that I crave at any given time. Even still, Eddie is a pure sweetheart and I love him and his heart-filled, passion-fueled, wonderful story.

9: The Smoke

I’m actually kinda surprised where this landed on the list, but let me explain. Dennis Severs is so much like Eggsy in terms of being a very layered, three-dimensional, incredibly deep and fascinating character. I love him. Nay, I adore him. I loved watching his ups and downs, his gut-wrenching revelations and triumphant success as he strove hard to free himself of the bondage of his past. But the show itself? It’s, same as Eddie, not something I feel drawn to watch at any given time. It’s intense, very intense, and asides from Dennis’ story, I didn’t really connect with any character, other than Kev. So in terms of watchability and enjoyment of the project overall, this ranks lower, but in terms of Dennis and his importance to me? Well, he ranks much higher ❤

10: Legend

So the first time I checked out this movie, I skipped through, searching for Taron. Next time, I skipped through again. Then I bought the movie and actually watched it, and I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it. Ignoring the obviously impressive feat that was Tom Hardy playing both main characters, I loved the relationship between Reggie and Frances and found myself caring quite a lot for them. I don’t know that I’ll ever watch it in full again but I do skip through every so often for Teddy and thoroughly that little psycho.

11: Sing

I’ve mentioned that I don’t really watch much of Taron’s voice work because I find it annoying to hear him but not be able to see him. That’s my ultimate problem with Sing. While a very enjoyable movie and one I’ve watched a few times all the way through, I don’t necessary care enough about the other characters to want to watch it from start to finish. I’m happy just skipping through for Johnny’s story, but there’s always that nagging feeling of knowing Taron is back there somewhere, looking breathtaking, and I can’t see him. And for that, I must place this sweet movie at the bottom of this list.

This honestly took hours for me to write and perfect but I think I’m good with it now. Phew!

I’m so sorry, anon, I’m absolutely certain you were looking for like two sentences to explain what I liked or didn’t like about each of these but instead you got a mini review. Whoops.

#Anonymous #Tracy's thoughts #Ask #Taron Egerton #If I got paid by the word...#No one signed up for this and I'm sorry #Believe it or not I tried to be brief

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lilacmoon83 · 4 years

Text

Lightning in a Bottle

Also on Fanfiction.net and A03

Chapter 8: Born to Be Yours

As Emma walked away to take a call, Margaret saw Regina coming out of the treatment room and she smiled.

"Hey...is everything okay?" she asked. Regina smiled.

"Yes...the treatment is continuing to go very well. Just a slow process," Regina mentioned, as she sat down.

"I want to thank you again...for insisting that Henry be admitted to this program," Margaret said, with tears in her eyes.

"I'm just glad it's working and that I could help," Regina replied.

"Your husband couldn't make it?" she asked curiously.

"Oh, he was on his way, but another passenger needed help finding a family member and David stepped in to see if he could help," Margaret replied.

"That's generous of him," she mentioned. Margaret smiled.

"That's my David...always my hero," she said fondly.

"So...I was a bit surprised to see you last night at the hanger," she mentioned quietly.

"Mmm...because I wasn't on the plane," Margaret said.

"Yeah...why were you?" Regina asked curiously.

"David had a feeling and whatever is responsible for these feelings might be what brought him back to me. If listening to this voice is what we need to do in exchange for our second chance...then we've decided that's what we'll do," Margaret replied.

"Wow...I think it's safe to say no other spouse is as understanding as you, let alone willing to go all in with this craziness," Regina mentioned. She shrugged.

"David is the love of my life...I'd do anything for him and he for me," Margaret replied.

"High School sweethearts?" Regina asked. Margaret beamed a smile.

"Yes...but we met when we were eight, actually," she replied. Regina's eyes widened.

"Wow...that's incredible," she said.

"What about you? Is there someone special you came back to?" Margaret asked.

"No...there was at one time. My own High School sweetheart, but he died just before we graduated," Regina replied. Margaret frowned.

"Oh...I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to dredge up sad memories for you," she apologized.

"No...it's okay. It was a long time ago and it helps to talk about it now," Regina said.

"We were nineteen and my mother disapproved, because Daniel wasn't from an affluent family. But I didn't care and we were on our way home from a date one night. We used to go horseback riding all the time," she said with a sad fondness.

"What happened?" Margaret asked. Regina swallowed thickly.

"A car came around the corner and swerved into our lane and struck us. We crashed into a tree. I had a broken leg and a concussion...but Daniel died on impact. They think the driver was drunk, but they never caught him," she replied.

"Oh Regina...I'm so sorry," Margaret said. She nodded.

"My mother acted like nothing happened and that it was even a good thing. Believe it or not, the night after he died, she tried to fix me up with some prince of Wall Street," she complained.

"That's horrible…" Margaret said.

"Yeah...so I really showed her when I got accepted to medical school. She was furious and I had eight years of bliss away from her. I visited Daddy as often as I could though. He always supported me," she replied. Margaret smiled.

"That's wonderful...I guess I kind of know what it's like to have a parent that doesn't approve of your choices," she said.

"Really?" Regina asked curiously.

"Mmm...my father is a very high end Wall Street broker and was never around much. Which was okay, because I was very close to my mother. She died when I was ten though," Margaret explained.

"That's terrible," Regina said.

"It was, but David and Emma were my best friends by then and they really helped me through. I started spending most of my time at their house, rather than go home to a big empty house. The staff was there to help me when I was there, but David's mother was always so warm and I kind of became her daughter too. Then we lost her when we were only twelve," Margaret replied.

"How awful…" Regina said.

"It was...it hit David really hard. He still tells me to this day that he doesn't know how he would have gotten through it without me. His father...he fell off the wagon hard and he pretty much stepped up to raise Emma. We both did," Margaret said.

"Wow...so you've really been through everything," Regina replied. She nodded.

"We used to get so many lectures about being as close as we were, but we knew we were in love by the time we were in eighth grade. They never stopped us...not even my father, though he tried," Margaret said.

"Ah...suddenly he took interest in your life," Regina said knowingly.

"Yes...he had plans to ship me off to an all girl's boarding school on the west coast to separate me from David. I thought my life was over," Margaret replied.

"What happened?" Regina asked.

"Well, Ruth knew of her husband's former drinking problem, so her life insurance was left in a trust to David and Emma. Ruth planned for everything in case something happened to her. We never met the financial adviser she hired, but this man always sent a man named Jefferson to oversee those kinds of things for David and Emma," Margaret explained.

"That's why they never lost the house and always had food, because Robert couldn't touch the money. But one day Jefferson came as he always did once a month. He made sure the mortgage was paid and groceries were stocked. But on this visit, he had something else," she said.

"Well...don't keep me in suspense," Regina urged.

"Emancipation papers for me," she revealed.

"I didn't even know you could do that, but he pushed it through and severed my father's parental rights. He didn't fight it, because he knew they could get him on neglect. He told me that if I continued to see David that he would take me out of his will and revoke my inheritance. I told him I would choose love with David a million times over his dirty Wall Street money," Margaret said. Regina smiled.

"Good for you...I would have loved to get emancipated from my mother. Fortunately, Daddy has always been in my corner," she mentioned.

"Robert wasn't there for David and Emma growing up, but he finally got clean after we graduated. And he really came through for me when the plane disappeared. He didn't touch a drop and helped me take care of the house, the bills, and Olive when I was just a complete mess," she said.

"Of course you were...sounds like you lost the love of your life," Regina said. She nodded.

"I did...and then by some miracle I got him back and our son. I'm sorry you didn't get your love back," Margaret replied. Regina smiled.

"Thanks...and I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you don't lose your son again," she said, as they looked through the glass at him. He smiled and waved at them both.

"He's a very special little boy," Regina mentioned wistfully.

"He is," Margaret agreed.

~*~

There was a buzz, as the doors were unlocked and August was led into the visitation box. He had a black eye and a contusion on his forehead. Riker's had a reputation of being a very rough place and it seemed that it was living up to that reputation in August's case.

"So it's true…" August said, as he looked at his father with wide eyes through the glass.

"It is...my boy," Marco said tearfully, as he put his hand to the glass.

"Who is this?" August asked.

"He is a friend, who helped me get into see you. He was on the plane too," Marco explained.

"I tried to do what you told me, before you left. I tried to be a good boy...work hard, be honest...and I did. But here I am anyway," August said.

"They said you used a fake ID," Marco said, trying to understand.

"I had to...after you disappeared, they tried to put me in foster care. But it was horrible and I hit the streets on my own. I bought a fake ID a couple years back so I could get work and it wouldn't flag me as a runaway in the system," he replied.

"Papa...I didn't do this," he pleaded.

"I...I know you didn't, my boy," Marco said, as the guards arrived to take him away.

"Wait…" Marco pleaded.

"Please...can you just give them a couple more minutes?" David asked. But the guards refused and took August back to his cell, while Marco cried.

"My boy…" he sobbed.

"He is innocent! I don't care what evidence they have! My boy is innocent!" he cried.

"And I'm going to do everything I can to help you prove it," David promised.

~*~

Mr. Gold stared at the board in front of him with the twenty passenger photos of those that had shown up at the hanger the night before. Two hundred and twenty people on that plane and they had just disappeared, only to reappear five and a half years later. It was impossible. Unprecedented. And some would say threatening and cause for alarm. If these people did not die in a plane that was presumed to crash, but never did, where did they go? Many theories had been thrown out there. Wormholes. Time travel. Even extraterrestrials. Many in the government were questioning if these were even the same people that came back. He was almost certain they were the people they said they were, but they were definitely different.

He had been fascinated by disappearances much of his life. Everyone he had ever cared about had disappeared from his life. His mother disappeared from his life at a very young age, leaving him with a drunken, abusive father. Then, perhaps as a blessing, his father disappeared when he was eight. That one wasn't much of a mystery. He was probably dead in a ditch somewhere. But he had searched for them both and never turned up any results. No trace of them and no death certificate for either. It was much the same for the woman who fathered his son. A one night dalliance and then nine months later, a baby on his doorstep with a note. She claimed she was sick and couldn't care for him. She named him Neal and needed him to take care of him. And he had, with great joy, in fact.

Things got tough between them in Neal's teen years. He was obsessed with his work and the fringe nature of it. Neal fell in with the wrong crowd, but it was his mistake of taking a trip to Egypt on an exhibition in search of answers to his questions that pushed Neal over the edge. He got into drugs and refused rehab. He felt abandoned and things were irrevocably strained between them, even into his adulthood. Neal hit rock bottom and was finally getting clean, until the worst happened.

He had gone on a hike to get a clear head as part of his program and was prepared to make amends as the next part. But his son disappeared up on that mountain, a year ago. There had been a horrific snowstorm on the mountain that night and he disappeared. His body was never recovered and he became yet another person in Gold's life that had disappeared. But for the first time, they disappeared and reappeared in the form of a plane full of people that should be dead. And it gave him hope that, perhaps death, wasn't as permanent as they thought.

~*~

"David…" Emma said in exasperation. Margaret smiled in amusement, as she stirred the sauce, while her husband strained the pasta. Emma sat on the counter, eating a meatball she had stolen, while the kids were setting the table.

"Emma...I know it's asking a lot, but can't you just take a look and see if they missed anything?" David asked.

"What...so this is the cops fault?" she asked defensively.

"No...but I have a feeling. This kid isn't guilty," she replied.

"Since when do you get feelings about people? I'm the lie detector in the family...not you," Emma reminded him.

"You know since when," he reminded her in return and she rolled her eyes.

"Fine...I'll look at it. Now, can we eat?" she asked, as they put the food on the table and all sat down.

"So…I was thinking maybe we could do an ice cream run after dinner. You up for it?" he asked Olive. Guilt was still eating at her and he could tell, so he put his hand on hers.

"Olive...your mom told me about Lance and it's okay if you still want to spend time with him. You don't have to feel guilty about it," he assured.

"Really?" she asked. He smiled at her.

"Really," he assured.

"Well...he did give me the key to his storage locker so I could get the stuff I need for the climb coming up. Do you think you could help me?" she asked. David grinned.

"Sure…we can go after dinner," he promised. Margaret smiled at them both, overjoyed that the gap between them was closing.

"Mom...while they're doing that, can we put my new Lego set together?" Henry asked.

"Sure sweetie...and then when Dad and Ollie get back with ice cream, maybe we can catch the three of you up one of the super hero movies you missed," she suggested.

"I'm all about that," Emma agreed, as they enjoyed dinner together as a family; something they would never take for granted again.

~*~

After they cleaned up dinner, Emma made the run to the station to get the file that David wanted and she sat down at her desk to go over it.

"I thought you went home," Killian mentioned, as he peered over her.

"Uh…I did. Just doing a favor for someone," she said vaguely.

"Listen Emma…" he started to say. She sighed and looked at him.

"Milah told me what she did and I just want to apologize. Coming in here like she did...she shouldn't have done that," he said.

"Can't say that I blame her. She loves you and is worried now that your supposed to be dead past is suddenly back," Emma replied.

"Still…" he admonished.

"It's fine Killian. She has nothing to worry about," she replied. He looked like he wanted to say more, but decided against it and left her to it. Emma continued to look over the file and everything seemed in order. She closed the file and texted her brother that she had no luck on this front. It was looking more likely that the kid he wanted so badly to be innocent wasn't. She knew it would be hard for him to accept and even harder for Marco, but she wasn't seeing any unexplored angles with this one. With that done, she headed back home.

~*~

David parked the car at the storage facility and they got out of the car.

"So...big climb in a few weeks?" he asked, trying to make conversation.

"Uh yeah...at first I wasn't into it, but then it became a good distraction," she replied.

"That's good…" he said, as he looked around, trying to get a sense of the man that Olive now saw like an older brother or father-type figure. He wasn't going to lie. It was a blessing in disguise that his wife hadn't moved on, though he would have wanted her to if he really was gone. But he was grateful for their unique relationship. They had been a part of each other's lives since they were eight years old and it wasn't something you just got over. He knew if the situation was reversed that he wouldn't have really been able to move on either. Margaret and his children were his entire reason for living. As he was about to help Olive with the things she needed, he heard the music again. But it was sharper this time and louder. He put his hands to his ears, as it repeated in his head again.

"Dad?" Olive asked, as he felt the need to follow it.

"Stay here," he told her, as he went down the hallway. As he walked, the music kept getting louder until it was almost earsplitting. He turned the corner, winding through the maze of lockers until he finally ran into an open locker. Inside, he spotted Blake, the jewelry shop owner's son. They stared at each other, as the music in David's head stopped and he spied all the stolen jewelry in the locker. The stolen jewelry that had sent August, an innocent young man, to prison.

"I...I can explain," Blake said, as he stood up and then tried to run.

"You mean how you stole from your own father?" David asked in abject horror.

"Look...this doesn't have to be like this. I'll give you half if you just walk away now," Blake offered. But a well placed punch in the face from David sent him collapsing to the ground. David took out his phone and called his sister.

~*~

Emma arrived with backup shortly and Blake was arrested. One of the officer's took David's statement and then finally let them go home. Margaret was waiting for them anxiously and threw her arms around them when they got inside.

"Emma said you caught the guy that really stole the jewelry?" she asked. He sighed.

"Yeah...it was that music I kept hearing. I started hearing it when we were at the storage unit and it led me to him," he explained. She smiled and kissed him soundly.

"And now an innocent man is going to go free, because of your help," she said proudly.

"Yeah...it was pretty cool. Dad totally punched that creep out," Olive mentioned and they enjoyed the way he got shy for a moment.

"An innocent man's life was on the line so I wasn't going to let him get away," he said.

"You're a hero...but then you've always been my hero…" Margaret said, as they shared another tender kiss.

"Ugh...I'm going to bed so I don't have to watch you two make out," Olive complained, but turned back to them briefly.

"But you still owe me ice cream, Dad. And I expect a triple scoop," she said. He grinned.

"Tomorrow night for sure, peanut," he promised, practically bursting inside that she actually wanted to do something with him now. Margaret smiled at him too, very happy that the gap between them was closing.

"Is Henry asleep?" he asked.

"He is...he tried to stay awake long enough, but I told him you were helping a passenger. He was pretty excited so he'll want to hear all about it in the morning," she replied.

"Well...then I guess it's just you and me," he mentioned in a sultry tone. She grinned and turned to switch the television off, which was on mute, but that's when they saw a passenger on the screen. Out of curiosity, Margaret un-muted it.

"The government is treating us like we're criminals. But we're the victims in all this. Everyone thinks we know what happened, but we don't," the woman said, with a headline beneath her stating "passenger of flight 828 speaks out". David sighed.

"Great...talking to the press. That will make things better," he complained. She leaned her head against his chest and he shut the television off.

"Do you think she's going to make things worse?" Margaret asked.

"Probably...but I'm not going to worry about that tonight," he replied, as he kissed her tenderly.

"Right now...you are the only thing I want to think about," he said and she swooned, as he swept her into his arms and carried her off to their bedroom.

On the other side of the city, Tisbe Taylor walked into her home that evening and turned on the television in time to see her interview airing. She knew the government wouldn't be happy about her talking to the press, so that's exactly why she had done it. It was expressly against the NSA's media blackout order, but she was never one to keep quiet. She sat down in her chair and failed to see the shadow behind her. The unknown person put a gun with a silencer to the back of her head and fired. Blood and brain matter spattered on the television and everything within a close radius, as the shadow retreated...

#Snowing #SnowxCharming #Snowing AU #Emma Swan #Henry #Regina Mills #mr. gold #Rogers #Manifest #with a Once twist #romance #adventure #family #AU #lightning in a blttle

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serendipityswift · 5 years

Text

first impressions of lover

ok i’m going to write down my first impressions to each of the songs; mostly for my own good and to get some of these feelings out

i forgot that you existed: bop! girl is over everything that’s happened to her. it truly feels like her moving on from reputation. she’s still singing about what she sang about in rep, but it just feels lighter? she’s no longer hurting, she truly can’t give a shit about people who fucked her over anymore.

fav lyric: in my feelings more than drake, so yeah

cruel summer: single material if i’ve ever heard one! i swear to god if this is another getaway car situation omg... i fucking love this song so fucking much. like, it doesn’t sound sad, but once you hear the lyrics, damn it hurts. she still thinks she’s bad news, like her loving someone will only hurt that person... yeah, ouch. i think sometimes we forget how hard it must’ve been for her to get together with joe, to allow herself to open up again, but this song really shows it. definitely teared up knowing, even just half, of the situation she was in.

fav lyric: i don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you / devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

lover: one of my immediate favs on the album. for obvious reasons. my first impression was literally just sobbing lmfao, and being happier for her than i’ve ever really been for myself.

fav lyric: with every guitar string scar on my hand i take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover

the man: this was one of the song i was most excited for! and she absolutely did not disappoint. like, honestly, looking at her career and the way the media and people perceive her... just imagine if she was a man. look at how fucking successful she is, and the hate she gets, just imagine if she was a man? and it’s things every woman fears, it’s thoughts we all have. the lyrics are so smart and powerful and so, incredibly, true - even if society refuses to admit it. it’s like blank space, but even more mature and just so, insanely smart. also, her use of ‘bitch’ in this song? absolute genius.

fav lyric: i’m so sick of running as fast as i can, wondering if i’d get there quicker if i was a man / if i was flashing out my dollars, i’d be a bitch not a baller

the archer: immediately one of my favourite songs she’s ever put out, and still one of my favourites on this album. i’ve never related to a song so much before tbh, like, it may not seem like her saddest song ever, but when it describes everything you’ve been feeling for the last 4 years... it hurts more than any breakup song. the buildup and structure of this song is incredible, and i can’t stress how important it is to me enough. i want to cry every single time i listen to this song sigh, but i’m so grateful to finally have it into words.

fav lyric: who could ever leave me darling, but who could stay? / all my heroes die all alone, help me hold onto you / they see right through me, can you see right through me? / all the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put me together again / all of my enemies started out friends / cruelty wins in the movies, i’ve got a hundred thrown out speeches i almost said to you

i think he knows: what a fucking bop omg. the sexual innuendos? yes. combined with the innocence? incredible. a little tongue and cheek, makes me smile and bop along to it. the lust and attraction and just all the cute feelings towards someone that we all know.

fav lyric: lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh, we can follow the sparks, i’ll drive

miss americana and the heartbreak prince: ONE OF MY FAVOURITE SONGS ON THE ALBUM, ONE OF MY FAVOURITE SONGS OF ALL TIME. i sobbed my eyes out listening to it, sobbing listening to it again. it describes the fear we all felt in 2016, even someone living hours and hours and hours away in nz. the fear we felt for the world and those around us, the anger and fear we still feel every single day. it’s the pain we don’t know how to vocalise, scared we’ll say something wrong and literally get hurt. she’s so brave, this song is so brave. this song is metaphorically, lyrically and sonically incredible. it’s just insane.

fav lyric: the whole school is rolling fake dice, you play stupid games, you win stupid prizes / i’m feeling helpless, the damsels are depressed. boys will be boys then, where are the wise men?

paper rings: what. a. fucking. bop. i can’t stop smiling and singing along even though idk the lyrics yet. also, all the references to old songs? and lowkey get fearless vibes but idk if i’m just too tired from it being almost 1am. i adore every single thing about this song. it’s realising you feel more for someone than you thought you did, then realising they’re the person you want to be with for the rest of your life. it’s literally everything. also, the stalking on the internet line? as relatable as any deepcut lyric she’s ever written.

fav lyric: i like shiny things, but i’ll marry you with paper rings / i’m with you even if it makes me blue

cornelia street: i already knew this was coming, but this is 500% one of my favourite fucking songs of all time. sobbed my eyes out. still crying listening to this again for the second time. the references to other songs, the story of us? god. it describes everything you fucking feel when you just feel so damn much for a person. loving someone so much that a city becomes them, the city that she first arrived in single and represented her freedom. it now is him. when you love someone so fucking much that you know if, just if, they leave you; you’ll be broken forever. and it isn’t like every other time, it’s harder and they hold more of you than you ever thought someone could. it’s running because you’re so scared they’ll leave and you’ll lose everything, then coming back because you trust them enough to think that they’ll stay. but you’re still so fucking scared because they truly have all of you.

fav lyric: i hope i never lose you, hope it never ends, i’d never work cornelia street again / sacred new beginnings that became my religion, listen

death by a thousand cuts: i was mesmerised by this song. it’s a ‘happy’ sounding sad song. which i love. the juxtaposition of it all. also the entire second verse is literally one of my favourite things i’ve ever heard so tbh that entire verse is my favourite lyric. also, i kind of want someone to sing this as a sad ballad and see what it’s like ahahha

fav lyric: my heart, my hips, my body, my love, trying to find a part of me that you didn't touch / our country, guess it was a lawless land / why are my fears at the touch of your hands? / paper cut stains from my paper-thin plans / my time, my wine, my spirit, my trust, trying to find a part of me you didn't take up / gave you so much, but it wasn't enough / i'll be alright, it's just a thousand cuts

london boy: ALL THE LONDON AND ENGLISH REFERENCES I CAN’T. as someone that lives in nz, the language she uses is so fucking funny and cute i can’t. also i keep thinking how ed taught her some of these things ahahha. and the nod to p!atd with “don’t threaten me with a good time” is so amazing. her reference to rugby? i’m taking all this luck by taylor and sending it to the all blacks thanks

fav lyric: doesn't have to be louis v up on bond street just wanna be with you

soon you’ll get better: i already knew what this song was going to be about, but that didn’t stop my heart from literally shattering into a million pieces. andrea is so important to each of us, i cherish the day i met her and held her hand like no other, just imagine what she means to taylor. she was there when taylor had no one, when she felt so alone. andrea is so special, and it is just so fucking unfair that she needs to go through this. i hope, pray, anything that andrea can get better soon, make a full recovery. and i hope her entire family is okay. they’re all so loved, so incredibly loved. but, cancer, i just wish i knew how to beat it and can take all this pain away. i can’t even listen to it a second time right now because i’m too much of a wreck. that’s how much it hurts. i love taylor for sharing this with us. i love that taylor loves us enough to share this with us.

fav lyric: but who am i supposed to talk to? what am i supposed to do if there is no you? / i’ll paint the kitchen neon, i’ll brighten up the sky, i know i’ll never get it, there’s not a day i don’t try

false god: this is one of my favourite songs. it’s so perfectly simple. it’s exactly what this album needs. the religious references throughout this album is incredible, and the idea that their love itself is a greater force is so beautiful and incredible. it’s knowing that even though their love isn’t perfect, it’s what they choose.

fav lyric: and i can't talk to you when you're like this, staring out the window like i’m not your favorite town. i'm new york city. i'd still do it for you, babe / and you can't talk to me when I'm like this, daring you to leave me just so i can try and scare you. you’re the west village. you still do it for me, babe

you need to calm down: this beat cannot get unstuck from my head once it’s in there. and the music video is one of my favourites of all time, the amount of gay power? legendary. it’s not just about the lgbtq+ community though, it’s about everyone and acceptance and not caring about the shitty views around us, because they’re wrong and they don’t matter. it’s so wonderfully patronising to the ignorant people in the world and i love it.

fav lyric: you would rather be in the dark ages making that sign, must’ve taken all night

afterglow: i love this song, and i love how this is at the latter part of the album. it’s fighting knowing they’re the one for you, after knowing they’re your lover and paper rings. it’s taking responsibility for when you fuck up because you can’t stop your mind from spiralling. you can hear the anxiety in the lyrics and the pain knowing you’re hurting someone you love, but you can also hear the surety in the song that they’ll be okay, and that’s so fucking beautiful.

fav lyric: why’d i have to break what i love so much?

ME!: taylor + panic i’m- they’re two of my favourite artists. this song by itself isn’t my favourite, but in the album, it suddenly all makes sense. this song is actually so catchy and uplifting and makes me smile. and it’s so weird listening to it without the “hey kids! spelling is fun!” ahhaha

fav lyric: babydoll when it comes to a lover, i promise that you’ll never find another like me

it’s nice to have a friend: this is so fucking cute i can’t even. i live for the simplicity of this. it’s just everything to me. the instrumental in the middle, the church bell sounds in the back, everything has changed mv vibes. mary’s song vibes. it’s so incredibly unique and special i love it.

fav lyric: light pink sky up on the roof, sun sinks down, no curfew. 20 questions, we tell the truth

daylight: i’m so fucking proud of her. another song i sobbed my way through. she managed to write 3 years of experiences into less than 5 minutes. the references to red? she knew exactly how that will cut us, and how she once had this idealised, dramatic version of love. when she finally found the real deal, she realised it’s just golden. it’s light and different to anything she could’ve ever even imagined. it reminds me that there’s light at the end of the tunnel, even if i can’t always believe it. even though the darkness felt like 20 years for her, now she only sees daylight. not because things are perfect, but things are better. i can’t imagine a more perfect way for the album to end.

fav lyric: i’ll tell you the truth but never goodbye / you are what you love / i once believed love would be burning red but it’s golden

i can’t say whether lover is my favourite album yet, but it’s a special album that’s for sure. every song belongs there, and it tells a story unlike any she’s told before. there’s every spectrum of love on here, and everything just feels so real and personal; because she’s finally found the love she’s been writing about her whole life.

#this is super long so more under the cut #this took me over 2 hours to write oops #taylor swift #lover #lover lyrics

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shewassoferal · 6 years

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after I talked to Kat about this last night, a friendly reminder that Jemma, whether I write her more canonically or au, is incredibly messed up by the fact that: LMD Fitz tried to convince her she was the LMD, pretended he had hurt himself badly just to trick her, plunged a knife in her thigh, knocked her out with a bucket over her head, started talking lovingly and kissed her forehead while she was tied to a chair, kept talking about their future together and about considering marriage while she crawled on the ground, kept screaming it was the real him and for her to stop when she stabbed him, choked her - actual choking sounds during the stabbing and dark marks on her neck were seen later -, and then Jemma had to drag herself away from there, kept heavily bleeding while she walked around to find other agents at the base, terrified of being attacked by LMDs again, thinking her friends might be dead and only Daisy had made it, while Daisy might be also losing her life at the time

and after this she went to the framework with barely any patching up, spent ten days in a very draining situation, one that Fitz feared might give a healthy May brain damage, not receiving any more painkillers, anything for the blood loss, nothing, went through more traumas by interacting with Framework!Ward who did have the face of the second man who tortured her, the one who dropped the pod and changed her life, the one who also told her ‘I’d never hurt you’ much like LMD Fitz, not to mention was also the face she saw Hive have while Hive also touched her face gently without permission while she was cornered and told her he wouldn’t hurt her, pretending to be Will and using their memories of them together against her. And there, in the Framework, she saw Fitz kill a real innocent woman, kept believing in him, saw everyone else succeed at dragging other real people into the SHIELD group, and when faced with the Doctor she was asked to kneel, humiliating and disturbing, shot in the leg by him, held at gunpoint and asked to say she meant nothing to him, and had Radcliffe save her

only to have one day and a half of “break” in which she went to give Fitz support, showed she didn’t hate him, she was there for him, and fought Aida, before being taken by another Monolith, another big trauma from her past, thrown into the future, immediately enslaved by a creepy alien who once again touched her gently without permission, killed people in front of her, forced her to change and wash up in front of Sinara, then forced her to wear clothes and makeup he liked her, deafened her and impaired her vision, kept her silent, threatened her with violence, talked right into her mind thanks to the implant, had her act as a servant, and spent days this way while only Daisy looked for her and then got captured, until Fitz arrived to rescue her, and was in a lot of pain when the implant was activated to hurt her

and then she immediately went back to supporting/comforting the rest of the team, telling Fitz that yes, they could make it home, telling Elena later everything she needed to hear

and that’s not even touching what happens during the rest of season 5, but for the entirety of aos, 99% of her traumas were inflicted to her, were never a choice or a self-sacrifice or anything she had a minimum amount of control on, and she keeps having her control and even her potential reactions ripped from her, and is not allowed to be angry or sad or show it because she’s the token hopeful character needed to encourage others, but in my blogs she’s going to be extremely fucked up due to what happened, and that’s also why I refuse to write the rest of her threads from now and to forever making them about her taking care of everyone else, she’ll do that when she can, but in 5x14 unless plotted differently in specific threads with Fitz rpers and Daisy rpers it was the Fear!doctor and fear!Fitz who operated on Daisy (and still, Jemma was held at gunpoint by a robot programmed by ‘fear!Fitz’ and had to watch Daisy get basically tortured, the way Jemma herself was a year and a half ago, and know that if she moved and got shot she wouldn’t be able to help patch Daisy up later and wouldn’t help anyone, she couldn’t stop this, so she had to stay there), Fitz isn’t having a psychic split multiple personality disorder whether they are dating or not, and by default at the end of the season no one dies and they go back to having more normal adventures and in Jemma’s case to healing herself without feeling guilty about it

again, this can be plotted differently for characters involved, by I will answer memes and start threads with, by default, a Jemma who is either healing with the team or has left SHIELD to heal, and has the chance to be happy again, and sometimes gives hope to others, sometimes has major freakouts or down times and absolutely needs help herself and is in no conditions of looking after someone else constantly, if she even stays

#about jemma #important

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