#its because he's a sad wet cat

[coldturkeybabe]

when u do sketches of one character and ur two faves somehow invade the page

[trainingdummyrabbit]

gnawing at th walls thingking about roland

[satowooo]

A DAY IN THE LIFE... WITH A CAT

Wherein Sukuna takes care of your cat for a day, despite his indifferences with it.

warning: animal cruelty

Your boyfriend, Ryomen Sukuna, is obviously not very fond of cats. Or to any living and breathing creature at all. But most especially your cat.

Sukuna hates it. Despise it even. He wishes it to be gone with just one flick of his finger just so the silly furball wouldn't take his time away from you. He hopes it'll get tired of you and run away someday because why are you always up on its face?

But then, that would make you sad. So he won't actually do anything to harm it, as much as he can.

To Sukuna, your cat is the most unearthly being that has ever walked on earth. Always tailing you around like a constant shadow, a menacing shadow. He dislikes it so much that it gets more of your attention than his.

“So cute!”

Sukuna watches the way your eyes glint in delight, squealing and feet kicking in the air while you're turned to your stomach right by the floor, playing with the little kitten you adopted. You had the most beautiful and widest grin spread on your face, and all because of an animal.

You can't seriously be so happy over that?

It has been a month since that kitten entered your life, and you hadn't been the same since. Well, you are the same, it's just Sukuna being exaggerated.

Why wouldn't he? You barely even look at him anymore because you're too focused on doting and feeding that animal, to the point that he's already making it a silent competition between him and the kitten about who wins your affections. And the cat wins every time. Every fucking time.

You're so head over heels about the white-furred kitten and he will never understand why. It's just another responsibility for you, another creature that will just distract you from your daily living, the daily living in question being the time that you're supposed to be doing with him instead.

“Look, Kuna!” You cheered, holding the cat by its arms to show the kitten to him, the said animal wearing small little glasses that would fit its little face.

Sukuna could only sneer, a frown obviously etched in his lip. “He looks pathetic. Get him out.”

“That's mean. Don't listen to him.” You turned the cat to face you and covered its ears, as if it'll understand what Sukuna says. The cat in return hisses at Sukuna, which made him scoff in disbelief.

Why are you even treating the kitten like a real baby? It looks so ugly!

But despite his inner thoughts, he actually finds himself caring for the cat, begrudgingly.

It's a furry dirty cat. He would only bring chaos all around your shared apartment. It probably doesn't even know how to clean itself. Sukuna would always think.

But he never really had a choice whenever you're gone at home, and he's left tending to the cat’s crazy needs.

“Will you fucking stay still?” Sukuna holds the cat by its scruff, not too tight though, just enough to hold him up to meet his gaze. The white kitten was all wet after Sukuna just gave him a bath. It meowed at him helplessly, making him smirk to finally see it in distress. “You're a handful, kitten. Why does she like you so much?”

This must've been the longest day for him yet, with you leaving Sukuna with the task to shower the kitten in your place because you'll be out the whole day. Who's he to disobey you anyway?

He wrapped the kitten in a towel, then took him by the counter. He let it sit there for a moment while it was licking its paws, while he rummaged through the cabinets to look for the hair dryer that you always used for the cat. Once he had it in hand, he faced the kitten again, his eyes glaring at the small creature who's just looking at him curiously.

This? This is the cat that you fawn over? He looks even ugly when he's drenched.

He could only shake his head at the thought, before plugging in the hair dryer so he could do his work. The cat tried to run away when he pulled him close, the hair dryer making a loud blowing sound as he fanned it all over the cat's body. A smile would tug on Sukuna's lips, finding the cat's helpless state funny whenever it meows in discomfort at his presence.

Well, let's just say it wasn't a very pleasant experience for the poor animal. As much as it is for Sukuna.

“Yeah, you look horrible. I know.” He chuckled darkly, gazing at the now dried-and-furry-again cat, all thanks to him.

He carried the cat and put it down the floor, letting it run away. He sighs, brushing a tired hand on his nape before he goes over to slump on the couch, resting his eyes for a moment. He could hear the thumps of the kitten running around, stumbling over who knows what, but he couldn't care less. Right now, Sukuna needs to have a moment. It was surely a new experience for him, and something that he will never do again.

It didn't take long for the kitten to go back to him though. It easily jumped on the couch, climbing straight to his lap. He groaned, feeling the cat tapping its little paws on his skin, opening his eyes to see it looking at him, expecting, or perhaps, asking for something?

“What do you want now?”

The kitten meowed, before jumping off his lap and heading straight to a little cabinet by the wall, where his cat food was hidden.

Oh, it's smart. He'll give him that.

“You're hungry?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at it. “Go starve yourself.”

Which wouldn't happen really, because the kitten started meowing furiously at him, which jolted all his senses awake. He cursed underneath his breath, letting out a grunt, standing up so he could give whatever the thing that the creature needed.

It was a very long and tiring day for him indeed. But at the end of the day, he's got the cat settled right above his chest, and he's petting its head softly as it lets out a purr. The cat’s tail would brush across his wrist, a sign that the cat must've been pleased with the gesture.

“I'll let you live longer.” He frowned, a low huff escaping from his lips as the cat only looked at him. “Just remember your place in this house.” Flicking the cat’s forehead softly as a finality, before he pushes it off and lets it fall on the floor, the cat swiftly landing on its feet.

After all, his pleasure is not his top priority, but yours. So, if keeping you happy would mean having this little cat between the two of you, then he might just let it for a while. For a while. Maybe. Depends if the cat crosses a line.

[bunnis-monsters]

This is a random crackish thought i randomly had

Getting diagnosed with anemia at the doctors office and your vampire bf is awkwardly shifting in the background because you both know he caused it

Its just hilarious in my opinion when you think about the mental image

And thank you so much for all your hard work!

OHH MY GOD

Just making eye contact with him after coming home after he reads your diagnosis. He feels awful. Your blood is delicious, but he didn’t want you to get hurt because of his thirsts!

Let’s just say he fusses over you, getting you an iron fish to place in soups and making sure you take your meds. He refuses to feed from you, only licking up your wounds when you get hurt like a desperate mutt, humping your clothed cunt as he does…

He goes to bite your neck during sex then pauses and just sighs.

If it’s himbo!vampire bf he spends a lot of time sulking and blaming himself. He was too selfish, drinking too much… and now he’s buying you red meats to eat, paying for all of your doctors appointments… anything to fix his mistake.

Just… wet cat vibes. Soggy and sad.

[noxcheshire]

Ya’ll don’t know how much I love de-aged Danny prompts and fics.

The fluff, the cuteness, the absolute squishable potential of a little toddler Danny who allows his new siblings to rub at his cheeks as a form of therapy cause it’s so chubby and soft. 🥹

And when he gives a beaming smile when he’s bombarded by hugs and kisses; or when he’s kicking his little feet as he’s pulled through the sky by the armpits, his sibling rushing through the halls with him — that is magic. That is just 🥰 AAAAAAAH

But the potential of ANGST, is also my jam and I will blend this toddler in the slim of sadness while the bat family screams at me in the background like feral coyotes.

Like, bare with me for a second.

Danny Phantom who was captured.

Danny Phantom who was taken apart and put back together again.

Danny Phantom who kept loosing more and more until he was just a tiny little baby version of himself, trying to sustain his own life but knowing that soon he will cease to exist in all its entirety.

Danny Phantom who has been hurt for so long that he dreams. He dreams of a life that could have been, and would have been, had things not become so terrible. And he dreams of people, of friends, of places he isn’t even quite sure ever truly existed.

He dreams happily in his own head, unaware of the passage of time and his ever closing in second death, until he wakes up.

His dreams splinter and fade like mist when the sun breaks through the sky.

But there is no comforting warm light for him when he blinks, only a searing, indifferent and blinding white.

He’s scared, and confused, and damaged in a way that makes him want to throw up but nothing comes out.

He isn’t even sure what he does, but he’s not there anymore in the cold white rooms with sharp things and green looming containers. Instead he’s somewhere outside, stumbling on trembling weak legs that he’s certain are too short but he isn’t quite sure because his head hurts and he can’t really see when everything is spinning and — and —

His lip trembles.

There’s a lot of green and red.

He doesn’t think his tummy is supposed to do that.

Is it supposed to be green? Or is it supposed to be red? Was it supposed to be coming out at all? It hurts. It really, really hurts, and he doesn’t know what to do when he doesn’t even know who he had been.

But he tries to gather it up, pushing the reds and green underneath the cover of his open skin.

It’s supposed to be in there… right?

But it’s not staying. Why won’t it stay?

He sniffles, frustration, exhaustion, hurt, and childish confusion mixing itself so spectacularly that he begins to cry.

And then something big and heavy plops itself on the ground with him.

It was so startling that he hiccups into a stop.

He stares, hands wet and his spilling tummy very heavy, but he doesn’t mind it as the very big cat person blinks slowly back at him. Or maybe a bat?

Is it friendly?

It’s crouching very slowly, even speaking in soft words. It must be friendly! He didn’t know bat-cat people existed, but he liked it very much.

He gives his hands to the bat-cat, presenting his insides for help.

[chirpycloudyrobin]

Masterlist || START || Next

im just thinking abt an au where wwx actually did die at the burial mounds but him surviving long enough there and even pioneering a new branch of cultivation to do so was enough to punt his ghost straight up to wrath rank. however he is unaware that hes actually dead since hes too focused on his goal to absolutely decimate wen chao to pay attention to his bodily functions/needs or lack thereof.

everyone else gets this feeling that something is off with wwx but they figure its just heebie jeebies from the demonic cultivation. it's only until wwx went back to the burial mounds with the wen remnants that it sinks in that hes dead. but then he realises that if this gets out, the cultivation world will be hunting for his head more viciously so he keeps this very tightly under wraps. all this secret keeping and exhaustion and starvation just makes wwx a teensy bit more volatile but at least he has his own little family to keep him sane.

until shit starts to go downhill. and it just keeps on going. until everyone is gone and hes the only one left standing and he needs to destroy the stupid fucking seal and keep the others from discovering where he hid a-yuan so he takes his chances and pours his everything into destroying the seal. except this time hes a little more powerful than he wouldve been if he was mortal and he levels part of the burial mounds before he went. and thus was the last of wwx.

or was it ?

the world believes wwx to be dead ("good riddance") but actually hes still kicking and in a more incorporeal form. he had to retreat somewhere deep in the burial mounds to recover and thus was unable to see that lwj had come back and taken a severely feverish a-yuan with him. wwx thinks everyone is dead and gone and everything was all for naught so he stews in his mistakes and tries to repent while stitching himself back together.

sometime after, he ends up in mount tonglu which was reopened because the aftershocks of the destruction of the stygian tiger seal were strong enough to disturb mount tonglu's magma chamber of resentment basically. so for ~12 years wwx was in there fighting his way thru which was why he didnt answer to lwj's calls

wwx survives as the last standing ghost after the slaughter and stews in the kiln for another month and a half or so. this would be around the time mxy is preparing to summon wwx's ghost for the summoning.

so imagine wwx just came out of the thing as a newly minted supreme/ghost king and hes immediately yanked to where mxy is. wwx's soul isnt stuffed into mxy's newly-emptied physical body since hes a ghost king this time around. still, he helps mxy but in the shadows bc hes still not keen on getting yoinked just when he returned to the mortal world.

everything proceeds as canon, with wwx sharing mxy's body via possession at some points for the comedy gold and the bit (because he would !! let the man be silly)

after that he absolutely yanks mxy outta there after lwj arrives (just after he spends like 5 minutes staring at lwj's beauty of course) and decides hes gonna adopt this sad little wet cat and teach him the actual proper ways of cultivation and steer him away from demonic cultivation bc tbh it's just not worth it esp since mxy has a golden core and who knows how demonic cultivation will affect a golden core-

anyways

wwx decides to do a silly little makeover so he wouldnt be recognised by any of his old acquaintances. his new appearance ends up a weird lil mix between himself and mxy, enough to claim that theyre distant cousins and normal rogue cultivators just starting out. wwx plans on taking his new charge around the country and away from the sects after he learned the godawful way the lanling jin have treated mxy

"single parenthood will be hard, but this father will make sure you get the best life on the road, my sweet little loquat." "you barely look older than me to be my father, wei-qianbei" "shush let me have this"

their traveling is off to a good start. but then dafan mountain happens and holy shit wen ning is still alive(?? technically ??) and holy shit why the fuck is everyone from wwx's previous life gathering here and holy shit did he just insult his shijie's son and-

why the fuck are they going with the gusu lan cultivators

what the fuck just happened

what

anyways

wwx introduces himself as a golden core-less distant mo cousin ("had an unfortunate run-in with the core melting hand back then") who used to be a rogue cultivator back in the day and is now dabbling with the art of talisman making and definitely isnt practicing demonic cultivation no siree

somehow he and mxy end up separated as lwj and wwx go to investigate the severed arm together and mxy ends up going w the juniors with a lil encouragement from wwx

"youll have a better time socialising with people your age, little loquat" "wei-qianbei plz ,,, u just want to go w hanguang-jun alone dont u" "lmao hahahahah who said that"

wwx is absolutely having the time of his life roleplaying a damsel in distress while being completely oblivious to the bone chilling fear he induces in their undead opponents. he invents silly little talismans to help hanguang-jun in battle. hes a little perplexed at how much shit lwj is letting him get away with.

hes also 90% sure lwj has figured out that hes a ghost and hes sweating like a sinner in church deep inside

i havent thought of much past this but heres some more tidbits of info that i thought about

at some point wwx is made aware of his infamy as the "Devil Flute Upon Graves". his self destruction at the burial mounds wiped out most of the vengeful ghosts in that area and, as mentioned before, shook mount tonglu w enough resentful energy to bust it open

wwx has an army of ghostly corvids that are essentially made of condensed resentful energy. they are also sort of empathetically connected to him ??? so theyre also chatty, yappy things who are extra fond of lwj and the junior ducklings

actually wwx's entire being post-supreme promotion is just condensed resentful/yin energy and being in his presence should be dangerous for regular ppl and cultivators alike but (a) he has mastered the art of keeping the effects contained within himself and (b) existing within the same space as lwj and doing their everyday means that their yin and yang energy are constantly balancing each other out to the point where it just naturally and passively happens. lwj literally dampens wwx's natural heebie jeebie vibes bc of good dick

because hes made up of yin energy, this does mean that it's ridiculously easy for him to switch back and forth between a male and female form. he usually ends up walking around in an androgynous form that leans towards a healthier, happier looking yiling laozu

VERY IMPORTANT ADDITION: yes ofc wwx gives lwj his ashes. it's in the form of an ornament. idk where to hang it tho. maybe wangji-guqin ? or his belt ? still debating on it for sure

the burial mounds are regarded in the ghost realm as his territory now and the ghost realm and heavenly court wait w baited breath to see what this new ghost king would do

the answer is he gallivants all over the damn continent with his new cultivator husband and their gaggle of children. wwx really dgaf about anything else really, he just wants to be Wife and Teacher

the wen remnants are given a second chance at life by wwx himself after the second siege of the burial mounds and they now live a happy afterlife at wwx's new ghost town where their old settlement used to be

he and hua cheng get along by virtue of being former street kids who just want to hang out w their godly spouses and their conversations together are just praise after praise for said godly spouses

wwx's birbs do eat hua cheng's butterflies and it's a frequent point of contention. no harm is done to the butterflies tho, the birbs just spit them out whole bc they taste absolutely nasty/poisonous

wwx 🤝 xie lian : little to no self-preservation instincts. they just want to help people okay !!

after the entire guanyin temple ordeal wwx ends up with a worshipped godly aspect whose primary place of worship is in yiling, who still remember the yiling laozu who just wanted to help his little family survive to the next day. to them, wwx became the god of innovation, ingenuity, and protection

he also becomes the patron god of street children ??? he just finds himself helping street kiddos and taking in vengeful ghost children because it was what he needed back when he was a kid okay ??? hes just using his powers for good, thats all

mxy is taken in by the gusu lan clan where he ends up become a promising candidate as a talisman master, thanks to wwx's encouragement and guidance

also !! it turns out more than a couple of other ppl ascended into the heavenly court, namely:

- jiang yanli ascended as the new water master, while jin zixuan became a martial god. shes a goddess of abundance, the home, and reconciliation. hes a god of wealth, fortune, and justice - nie mingjue also ascended to become a martial god after his spirit was laid to rest. he was supposed to ascend naturally but jin guangyao's bullshit derailed his fate. - wen qing ascended to become a medical master/goddess of medicine and sacrifice tho shes also kind of infamous for her friendship with devil flute upon graves. but nobody can say shit cz if they do say shit then they wld also be saying shit abt hualian and they dont want to deal with two calamities up their ass

thats all i can yap abt rn but i might add more we dunno

[kangmoon27]

CHAOS DISASTER | Jungkook Oneshot ff

Pairing: King-obsessed Jungkook x Princess Y/n [Royal Au,]

Summary: You meant no harm to anyone but with you not being by the king's side is a threat to everyone, chaos disaster will happen cause the king Is out there ready to throw kn'fe in everyone's throat without you by his side.

Tears falling. A dark cloud screams with lightning. Slippy mud. Rain falling. Everything is literally going through the same thing that you feel. Almost like it simplifies you, like the whole world is on the side of your feelings.

Is this how love should be? Painful?. You thought it's about happiness, feeling of satisfaction, the feeling of being loved, cherished, cared for, admiration but none of those feelings even went through your life. For you love is all about sadness, betrayal, hurtful, harmful, it will only hurt you and you should run before you even bury yourself in that stupid love that everyone believes and that's what you're doing right now. Running for your life.

Running for your remaining life that was drained because of that stupid love. No one can love you and no one will love you and that's all you have to believe. No more stupid butterflies, no more sweet kisses, no more romantic music, no more slow dance. You must bury them. No more.

Birds crys as well as you as well, falling onto your knees begging your heart to stop beating just to make the pain go away. Nothing is left, you're drained out.

It's raining cats and dogs. He tries to find a big tree to stop over and let the rain at least calm down. He settled himself under a hundred years old bristlecone pine tree. The cold blaze made him shivers, both arms find its way to wrap around his chest while watching the rain drops end in mud. As he's about to sit after an exhausting day he spotted a huge pile of fabric laying on the slippy wet ground.

The thing that instantly went to his thoughts is that he can use it so that at least he could keep himself warm under the cold blaze and rain drops pouring out. He walked towards it, pulling and forcing to take it in his direction when he suddenly noticed something. It's not just a pile of fabric but a woman. He was stunned and didn't know what to do but eventually he did what anyone would do if they are in the same situation and that is to help the girl and pick her up. He put her down under the tree and started wiping her face covered in mud. Looking at her unconscious face the man couldn't help but to memorize the beauty of the girl he's facing right now. He could feel his chest wanting to be ripped and offer his heart to the lady.

He chuckled and slapped himself to wake up from his dream. There's no way this woman would like him. Not when he's the laughing stock of the ton with his ugly face and poverty. No one would want to even be with him.

After an hour, the cloud finally stopped crying. He fixed himself and settled to leave but before he went. The man knee down offering the unconscious girl his bottle of water and some food. Clearly he's not a fool or that kind to just take a woman to his house and be that chaos in his life and he made that clear after looking at her for the last time before he walked away and went home.

Door cracks letting the other person know her brother is back. She turned around and immediately offered warm fabric that will help him dry himself.

"Have you heard the commotion in the kingdom? The princess is missing brother." The teen said while helping her brother to take his shoe off and put down his things.

The elder sighs and looks at his sister. "How many times do I have to tell you to not get yourself involved in those kingdom and palace things Myani".

"But brother-" as the younger one tried to defend herself her brother cut her off "No more Myani, no more".

He left her sighing and went straight to the table where his sister prepared food for both.

"The ton talks about the reward that they will get as soon as they find the princess, they said it a huge amount of gold and-"

"MYANI!!" Everything went silent after the man shouted. He angrily threw his food away and went out shutting the door behind her. She silently eats her food while looking down, instantly regretting everything she has done.

"Excuse me, may I ask for your help?" He turned around and saw the same lady he saw on the Forest just an hour ago. "What do you want" he said directly asking her. "Food a-and clothes if ever" she said.

It took a few minutes of his stares to finally let her in his house, offering her food and clothes that are owned by his sister. "What's your name? You're so beautiful" Myani asked. Looking at her soft skin and flawless features truly made her amazed by her beauty. "Wait are you princess?!" She asked excitedly.

"I-I am. I'm Y/n and you are?" You asked making the teen jump around in happiness. "Are you seriously the princess? But they said you run away, why? Don't you like being the Princess?." You were taken aback by the sudden question and the man seems to notice that even if he's standing a little far away from you.

"Myani that's enough, go and sleep now" as the man commanded, the teen couldn't do anything besides listen with a pout in between her lips.

"T-thanks, it's uncomfortable talking about it." You said. You continue eating your food while being watched by him.

"I'm returning you tomorrow." He said.

You stopped eating and look at him in horror, that's the least thing you thought about after meeting him.

"I'm no harm" you said with a low voice as the fear began to eat your entire brain and soul. Just the image of you returning to that hell is the end of you.

"You, yourself here is going to be the end of mine and my sister's life. I think you're aware that the king is already out there looking for you ready to throw a kn'fe in anyone's throat just to find you is that what you meant by not a harm?" He said while looking at you dead in the eye.

"Please don't, I'll do everything you want just please don't bring me back to that cruel monster." You immediately stood up and kneel In front of him but your begging seems to not have touched his heart a bit.

With a heavy heart you immediately stood up and decided to offer yourself to him, pulling the stand of your clothes and eventually stood up nked right to his face. "What are you doing?" He asked.

"Do whatever you want but please don't take me away from here. This is the only place I feel safe so please I'm begging you." His warm hand grabbed your shoulder. "You don't have to offer yourself, princess. But I hope you understand that I only care about my sister's safety." Picking your clothes and covering your exposed bdy with it before leaving you behind being helpless.

"What do you want?" The king asked.

"Peaceful life away from all your sins and evilness." Jungwoon said making the king laugh.

"You still haven't changed a bit brother. You came here offering me my beautiful bride just to ask me for a peaceful life? Chaotic. I have my word written in stone that whoever brings me the princess back will get whatever they want and you're actually the one who did so without feather question being asked just tell me what you want. Anything." The king said.

"I already said what I want" Jungwoon said making the king laugh once again.

"I think you're aware that the only place where you can live peacefully is dea'h right?, I believe that's where you wanted to go as well as our sister Myani right?."

As soon as the king said that, jungwoon couldn't help himself and immediately threw a hard punch in the king's face. "She doesn't have a monster brother like you. I'm trying to give her a good life!! away from your evilness!!"

Jungkook just laughed. "You're acting so pathetic, just admit it, you want my throne, you're jealous and furious about me being the king and not you, and it's because you're ugly and unwillingly for our people to follow your order with that kind of face, they even said you're the monster here."

Jungkook stared at his twin and shoke his head before pulling jungwoon's hate tightly making the other twin kneel in front of him. "Who would have thought that you're my own twin, we're nothing alike, you're the disaster between the two of us."

"You know what I actually wanted to see Myani if she suffered the same fate as you." With that jungwoon fight over trying to pin down the king but couldn't. "Don't you dare come closer to her!! I've already given her up for you!! So don't you dare touch Myani with your dirty hand." Jungwoon stated.

"Oh yeah, Y/n my beautiful wife, isn't she beautiful? So you actually reunited with our other sister last night huh, did you tell Myani about her Being her sister and her soon to be sister in law?" Jungkook smirked.

"You're cruel" Jungkook looked at Jungwoon for the last time before his knights threw him out of the castle.

"Please stop. Stop this please I'm your sister. " You begged him to stop but he didn't, begging him only made him feel more in power, more in control and that's the feeling he loved the most.

"And I'm your king, your husband." He said and growled after burying himself deep ins'de you. Your screams are like music to his ears.

"At least you've met your brother and sister before you get locked in this castle again. Don't worry my love, we will fill this kingdom with our numerous children." The king started making you lose your mind.

You don't know how long you can handle the chaotic happening in your life right now.

He's clearly not yet satisfied, he pulled you up and slapped your face. Several servants entered his chamber nked. You're drugged down, pin in bed as they hold your both hand and feet, offering you to their king.

The sensation is so good, so euphoric, hard ridges rubbing against your cl't as he slides into you. You almost forget about the other, but then he starts working his way into your a's, grunting with exertion as you m'an. Too much, too big, too full. You just couldn't help yourself.

Your head is spinning, your entire body on fire as he thr'sts in time. It feels like you’re being torn apart, and yet each stroke electrifies your nerves, sending waves of pleasure up your spine and through your limbs.

Your climax is forceful, your c'nt and a's clamping down on them as you cry out, tears blurring your vision as ecstasy overpowers you. Moments later, the king let his own groans, sticky seed filling you, overfilling you, dripping down your a's and between your th'ghs.

"This is the welcome greetings that I always want from you. But next time I'll make sure you won't escape me again." He said before pulling you up again. Tied you up in the chair and made you watch him doing himself with his sinful m'an calling out your name.

[tinytalkingtina]

Fancy Falling Into You Here

Written for the August @steddiemicrofic prompt, using the word "plug" and 437 words.

437 words | Rating T | Ao3 link

On their first date, Steve and Eddie come to realize they had first met under much more embarrassing circumstances.

Tags: EMT Steve, Coffee shop owner/clumsy Eddie, first date, minor injuries (nothing described in detail), modern AU, embarrassment, BBC's Sherlock haunting all of us when plugging in our phones

Inspired by @dreamwatch for making me think of steddifying this post! Author's notes under the cut

"G-d damn BBC Sherlock," Eddie grumbled as he fumbled plugging his phone into its charging cable for a third time. "Stupid Benedict Cumberbatch and his weird attractive cheekbones." 

A snort from the couch reminded him he actually had company, oops.

Eddie gave his date a grin. "Sorry, I'd love to say that I'm normally as graceful as a swan or something, but as you've seen, unfortunately abject clumsiness is par for the course. It's a miracle my coffee shop's still standing."

It was fine. He could still salvage this and come off as less of a disgruntled sad wet cat man to Smooth Hottie with Glasses and That ButtTM of daily matcha latte with oat milk order fame. Still, Hottie (who went by "Steve", apparently) didn't really seem turned off by Eddie's whole deal. He just laughed.

"Oh, trust me, I've seen much worse. My first year as an EMT, we got a call to a college dorm. This unlucky dude fell off the top bunk and somehow broke both legs and an arm.”

Eddie froze, his quest to charge his phone completely forgotten.

“Plus the guy managed to down the shade on the way too, honestly it was an impressive amount of damage from a 4 foot drop," Steve continued on, oblivious. “One of the funniest calls me and my partner have gotten, and we once had to take care of someone who accidentally fell on a Buzz Lightyear toy and somehow got it stuck up their—you okay man?"

"I panicked and thought the cord would hold my weight." Eddie hid his face in his hands.

"Oh shit. You're 'broke all his bones man'?”

This was a nightmare. "Oh my G-d, I was so woozy. Please tell me I didn’t say anything weird.”

“You asked if I could ‘kiss your booboos better.’ Guess you’ve grown out your hair since?”

"I had to buzz it all off that semester because I had an Incident with some gum," Eddie groaned. "You can go now, I won't hold it against you."

He heard Steve slide closer. "And what makes you think your whole 'Bambi on ice' thing isn't working for me?"

Eddie cracked open an eye. "You sure about that?"

"Pretty sure," he said with a wink. "Plus, if you meet my friend Robin, she's known me since high school. Which means she unfortunately has photos of my braces years. You’re gonna have to stick around long enough to see em."

Eddie stared. Smooth Hottie still wanted him somehow? "Okay Big Boy, looks like I will." 

Steve smiled back. “Good. Now, lean back, I owe you a few kisses.”

Authors notes:

In case you weren't on Tumblr in the early-mid 2010's and remain blissfully unaware of BBC's Sherlock, please watch this clip to understand why Eddie is cursing Benedict Cumberbatch when he fails to plug in his phone fully sober

Eddie, Jeff, and Chrissy run a little coffee shop (complete with monthly open mic/karaoke nights) that EMTs Steve and Robin frequent. Not to worry, Robin will eventually meet her future wife Vickie at the shop after Vickie wins her heart with a rendition of "Before He Cheats."

Originally I had injured Eddie ask Steve about his biblically accurate angel form, but since I decided that Eddie's accident took place around 2010, and the angel meme only took off in 2020, I rewrote the line to be about kissing his booboos. Let's pretend this happens after a separate accident befalls Eddie (he'll be fine): Eddie: Ouch, I was out of it after they gave me the painkillers. I think I called you an angel? Steve: Yeah, you asked if my biblically accurate form had eyes as pretty as my human ones.

[gayelderstourney]

OLD MAN YAOI BRACKET ROUND 1

Propaganda:

Bob Zanotto/Helmut Fullbear:

THEY LITERALLY MADE MR CRY THE FIRST TIME I PLAYED THE GAME. THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH AND THEY FINALLY GET TO BE HAPPY TOGETHER. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO ME.

they are married in canon and are epic and amazing. they had sad canon events where bob thought helmut was dead for like 30 years or something but helmut WASN'T dead his brain was still alive and they are reunited in the game first by way of stealing an evil dictator's body and then later on they put helmut's brain in a ball as a temporary fix while they go out to find his body which has been frozen in ice. the game forces you to walk through bob's memory of saying his vows at their wedding ceremony and it's seriously some of the most romantic and heartwarming shit i've ever heard, especially "just when i thought i was turning to seed, you made me bloom again" like my god. i love them

they're gay and old as hell!!!! there's a level dedicated to their wedding!!!

Helmut is voiced by Jack Black and is currently a brain in a ball, and Bob knows him so well that the mental image of him in his drunken mind says things Bob KNOWS the real Helmut would never say. Also Helmut is temporarily in the body of a guy voiced by Elijah Wood-

Craig Cuttlefish/DJ Octavio:

well you see they used to be friends but were on opposite sides of the great turf war. cuttlefish gets a 14 year old to go stop octavios army. also they argue in splatoon 3 which is just part of the 100+ year divorce arc BUT AT THE FINAL BOSS IN THE JAPANESE VERSION THEY SHARE THE ICONIC LINE THAT CUES THE CALAMARI INKANTATION AND IN THE ENGLISH CUTTLEFISH TELLS OCTAVIO TO "HIT IT" AND START THE MUSIC AND MUSIC IS SO IMPORTANT TO THE SPLATOON UNIVERSE YAAAAA ik its grasping but its lovers to enemies

Literally I have seen so many people call this old man yaoi.

Old men divorce!!!

They're old men who made their divorce the problem of every young person in their lives <3. 100 years ago during the Great Turf War between inklings and octarians, Craig and Octavio were the chosen ambassadors of their respective species. They got along well, but unfortunately found themselves on opposite sides of the war. During one of the battles Craig shot Octavio in the heart. The inlkings won the war and the octarians were forced underground. For years afterward both men grew bitter towards each other, and eventually Octavio attacked the new Squidbeak Splatoon (a group of secret agents recruited by Craig). Octavio lost both times and got imprisoned in a giant snow globe (and Craig calls him cute). In the latest game Octavio got over his hatred for Inklings (Craig's species) and used his flying mech to help defeat the BBEG of the game. After the final fight, Craig said something to the effect of 'that old rascal turned out to be not so bad!'.

Alright ok hear me out! These two old men have fought in wars for their races against each other and have the craziest pathetic old man homoerotic tension ever. They like, went from at least respecting each other before the war and then they were forced to fight each other and then when Cuttlefish's side won, Octavio went underground like a pathetic lil wet cat and later on he kidnapped Cuttlefish because of game related reasons and both of them still have way too much homoerotic tension!!! And then Octavio gets owned and then in the second game Octavio decides that "Hey actually, lets kidnap Cuttlefish's granddaughter" and the old man isnt even there cause hes busy being a pathetic old man in the under-underground!!! And in the third game they go fron rival/enemies to reluctantly working together to save the world from actual extinction bc some durry bitch wants to cover it in fuzzy ooze and like, both of them have so much old man ship potential and just- theyre still pining for each other even after over a 100 years man,,,,

I personally headcanon Cap'n Cuttlefish as homophobic, but I see the ship a lot and think it's funny.

They’re both at least like 125 probably a bit older, they are so divorced, like peak lovers to enemies back to lovers, Cap’n Cuttlefish calls Octavio cute in Splatoon one immediately after you rescue him from Octavio kidnapping him? So dysfunctional, so gay, so old

They fought in the Great Turf War which was said to be over 100 years ago, Capn Cuttlefish was, well, a captain I believe (he had some sort of rank even if he wasn't a captain, like he led a battle that's singled out in the sunken scrolls of the first game). they act so divorced in the singleplayer mode like they cannot stop insulting each other specifically but octavio always comes back and like kidnaps or insults captain cuttlefish it's so. and when the great zapfish gets stolen in splatoon 3 captain cuttlefish is like "it's the octarians again i know it" like divorced behavior. also it wasn't this time and octavio gets super weird about it. maybe you should stop using children as props in your drama though.

my favorite war crime divorcees <3

They basically are friends to enemies to lovers. Both of them fought in a war that hurt DJ Octavio so bad he can’t become an inkling.

friends -> enemies -> lovers. what more is there to say

they are soooo divorced

they were so gay their breakup ended a war

Craig Cuttlefish got sucked dry by a bear

they got divorced but then they got remarried . they fuckinf hate eachother but they also make out sloppy style and i do not know how that works because neither of them have mouths in their swim form which they are both permanently stuck in. love wins but also loses at the same time with these fucking losers

they are sooo divorced omg. istg they were dating when they were younger and then war n shit happened and now theyre bitter exes who probably still make out sometimes. Makes it so much funnier that theyre old ass men (both over 100!) and Cuttlefish has grandkids

They were on opposite sides of a war and still fell in love

[mintiicinnamonii]

traffic light trio romantic headcanons!! (gender neutral reader)

Red Son

tsundere 100%

his primary ways of showing affection are gifts and words of affirmation. he’ll make inventions tailored specifically to your personality and needs, give you extravagant gifts like jewels and other fancy items

watching him work and listening to him infodump <33

he often uses poetic, fancy words, and when he praises you, its over the top (because hes red son, of course he’ll go above and beyond)

this man gets jealous VERY EASILY. Someone so much as looks in your direction? BOOM. DEAD.

he probably gets easily flustered too. cause like… look at him.

if you two get married, regardless of gender you would be the one to propose

has the more ‘submissive’ role of the relationship (i.e: you’re the one who courts him, you open the door for him etc)

im sorry simps but man is a BOTTOM (not sexually in this case LOL)

calls you darling, beloved, my love, and dear/dearest

fancy lil fella <33 probably wanted to take you out on an extravagant and amazing first date but flubbed the whole thing (you still love him)

you probably call him your wife 💀

—

Mei

ADHD GF YEAHHHHHH

she probably shows you off to everyone she knows (including her followers)

”I LOVE THIS PERSON MORE THAN MY DAMN PARENTS” (she does..)

unlike Red Son, who’s relationship would have more romantic yaoi energy, Mei and you would have a more exciting, lively relationship

“hey mei where are we going” “idk” “have you been down this road” “no” “…lets see where it leads” “okay”

you’d react to fanart of you two together <33

she’s probably a tease, but not a flirt

she’ll be walking in a store and see something that reminds her of you constantly; she always thinks of you <3

the first to confess

wore a suit to your first date, bc SLAY WOMEN IN SUITS

you two drive around on her bike

probably doesnt use pet names.. she finds your name beautiful already

—

MK

OKAY THIS MAN IS SO FAILWIFE

LIKE.. HE TRIES TO OPEN THE DOOR FOR YOU, BUT IT SLAMS IN YOUR FACE

calls you sunshine. seriously calling you sunshine to MK is sun wukong to calling you peaches

stutters a LOT when talking to you/around you

this man is clingy as hell. he will get sad when you have to leave to work or get out of bed like.. THIS MAN NEEDS AFFECTION AND HE NEEDS IT NOW

protective dad pigsy is real, and MK is completely oblivious to it bc goober

i hc that he has inattentive adhd, so when he zones out you snap him out of it with a kiss

in his monkey form he PURRS

cries when he stubs your toe on accident

loves wearing your clothes, especially jackets and t shirts

compliment him and he goes crazy.

like.. “oh mk you look good today” or “hey sunshine”

BLOODY NOSE ON THE FLOOR DYING.

he is very easily flustered, but is less ‘angry wet cat’ about it than Red Son

more like “ueueuueueueu”

cheesy pick up lines!!

—

This is my first time writing x readers, so if yall could gimme some tips or requests, that’ll be cool :3

if you dont like x readers, thats fine :D! I have multiple friends who don’t like x readers and its perfectly valid. I make other stuff too, like original content and such! have a good day!

[jane-john-doe-tournament]

Jane Doe (Ride the Cyclone) Propaganda:

Great singing, also she’s literally wearing a doll‘s head bc she lost hers

do they have their soul or is it rotting somewhere with their head?

BALLAD OF JANE DOE IS SO SAD AND SHE IS GREAT AND I ONLY WATCH RTC ONCE BUT SHES NY FAVE OK

cool asf

She forgets her name after her death and has no story told in the production

She's so sweet and deserves the world. Her song (The Ballad of Jane Doe) is great.

the song goes so hard just listen to her song guys please

she literally died and her head was cut off so nobody could tell who she was PLEASE let her take one (1) W

BECAUSE SHE IS AMAZING. First she already won the tournament in the musical to regain life, as she won them over with her sad wet cat energy because she did not have a head and feared that she lost her soul. Second, she died on a roller coaster and lost her head, but stole her doll's head and thats very gender. Third, throughout the musical she is used as a vessel for religious allegory, she is an angel, she is jesus, she is a demon, she is forsaken but she is purity itself. Fourthly, she is is given the identity of Savannah with the greenest eyes after the other characters who died with her hold her a birthday party, and I think thats sweet because its probably some kind of meaning I cant see but auughfhfhh shes so cool

i mean her name isn't TECHNICALLY jane doe but we refer to her as such. she's so silly!! autism powers! i don't have a lot of propaganda tbh. i would've just been surprised had she NOT been submitted

She lost her head literally when the rollercoaster derailed. She wasn't able to be identified apart from the school uniform she was wearing.

Her name is forgotten, and so is everything about her. So she’s called Jane Doe. She’s very sweet and very creepy, but she doesn’t mean it

and im asking WHYYYYY LORRRRRDDD

I LOVE HER! she died in a roller coaster accident and was decapitated, her body not being found. in the show, her head is actually just her doll’s head. the coroners couldn’t identify her, so she was dubbed a jane doe. in the game to be alive again, she ends up being voted, her name being revealed to be penny lamb. anyways she’s a little creepy and also quite silly and she does her funny little waddle like a porcelain doll (or corpse).

She deserves it! She lost her head she shouldn't lose this too.

Not convinced you didn’t start this tournament just for her tbh

They have a great song and a true air of mystery to them. They also have arguably the best song in the musical, The Ballad of Jane Doe! I would definitely recommend listening to it >:)

—She LOST her HEAD and had it replaced with a PORCELAIN DOLL —In all seriousness her story is really poignant. No one could identify her body so she arrives in the afterlife not knowing her identity and she spends the show vacillating between depressed and angry at her situation, leading to… —“The Ballad of Jane Doe”, specifically Emily Rohm’s version, might be the most haunting solo in musical theatre history.

John Doe (Malevolent) Propaganda:

Spooky gay eldritch disaster (am I doing this right?)

Could have chosen any name for himself and picked John because a kind person called him that :)

fractured piece of an eldritch god that shares a body with a private eye after being fractured. chooses the name John Doe after said private eye goes into a coma

Because he’s an eldritch god who wants to feel human and who overcame a lot of obstacles and dangers!!! He sincerely cares about the main character!!! And he chose a name himself! Isn’t he cute??? He lost his body, he almost lost his memory, he fought for his right to exist, he loves animals, he loves his friend Arthur and I love him!

Being an ass, friendship, spooky supernatural stuff, he’s got it all

My man heard the name John Doe, realized he didn’t actually have a name, and just. Took it for himself.

I LOVE HIM. MY SON. HE’S TRYING TO CHANGE AND BE BETTER AND :(((( He’s a fragment of the soul of the King in Yellow (god of trickery and suffering iirc??) that gets trapped in a book in our realm while the rest of the King stayed in his own separate realm. When a human named Arthur Lester opens the book they get linked and John gains control of Arthur’s eyes & kills his partner (oops!). They proceed to go on a quest to find a way of separating them because neither likes the situation, and at first John (or The Entity, which is what he’s called at first) just wants to trick and use Arthur, and control his entire body (through the first season he also gets a hand & a foot) even though he doesn’t remember being The King In Yellow at the time, but Arthur makes him change and become more human. His turning point is when Arthur is shot and falls into a coma for a month. They get treated at a hospital and while John waits for Arthur to wake up so they can carry on, the body itself still gets taken care of. The time John spends alone, contemplating on humanity & everything he’s seeing and learning from Arthur, as well as the way a certain nurse speaks to him every day (specifically, she greets him good morning and good night, despite the body being unresponsive, John still hears because he is an entity linked to the body) and calls him John (they didn’t have ID on when they were found so they were classified as John Doe), changes his outlook and plans for good, and he asks Arthur to call him John; from this point on he admits he cares for Arthur, looks for his wellbeing too, and in general attempts to be a better person and to live for himself. The rest of the podcast (ongoing!!) explores Arthur & John’s relationship, struggle to survive, adventures in the eldritch… All while tackling each of their issues with themselves and each other and watching them both grow. John in specific learns to be the person he wants to be, how sometimes you’ll take a step forward and two backwards; he can be cruel and manipulative sometimes but he still tries. Personally I love his journey, it’s very realistic and you can see he is trying his best, and how he wants to be better than he was as the King In Yellow, and how much Arthur has changed him and how much he cares about him because of that; and how he’s slowly growing into being his own person :) if it ends badly ill cry so hard but!!! he’s John Doe because that’s the name he was being addressed as, and he’s made it his, and being John means he’s no longer the King and that he wants to be different, and John can fail or make mistakes but it’s part of who he is now, and that’s what matters. I am So Normal About Him

JOHN DOE (Malevolent) SWEEP

OH MY GOD JOHN DOE MY BELOVED 💛💛 (watch me just not clarify that would be so funny ahah) John doe (Malevolent) 💛💛💛 my silly He's so funny he makes Arthur bump his head into a dock because he didn't say duck in time and then laughs at him 💛💛

[ceilidho]

6’4 over 200lb simon ghost riley rescuing a tiny little kitten who he found on the street and just couldn’t let go of so he kept him. they’d be best friends i think about this every single waking moment of my day

i don't know about tiny little kitten but only because im emotionally attached to the idea of simon inadvertently rescuing an old stray that keeps stopping by his place.

the kind of cat that's maybe missing an eye or half its tail and no one treats it with any kindness because they just see it as this old, ugly cat, and simon sees it outside his place one day when he's bringing out the trash in the rain and it looks so pathetic and sad curled up under the lip of a cardboard box trying not to get wet so he brings it out a can of tuna. and slowly it starts warming up to him and stops hissing whenever he gets within five feet of it (because the cat's afraid of being hurt) and one day simon leaves his door open a crack and it finally comes in and never leaves after that.

[auras-moonstone]

Hii! Could you please write an ethan fic based off the ybwm music video but y/n and ethan are childhood bestfriends and but doesnt notice her until prom? ALSO IM LISTENING TO 1989 TV RN AND ITS SOOOO GOOD

been here all along — ethan landry

word count: 3,306

pairing: ethan landry x fem!reader

summary: ethan and y/n had been best friends since they were little, but y/n, unbeknownst to ethan, has always been i love with him. it isn’t until prom night that he finds out.

warnings: none!

Y/N WAS STUDYING ON HER DESK WHEN SHE SAW HER BEST FRIEND’S SILHOUETTE THROUGH HER WINDOW. Ethan threw himself to the bed, lying on his back as he tiredly rubbed his face with the hand that wasn’t holding his phone to his ear. He felt eyes on him, so he turned around and saw the girl staring at him with a worried expression. He smiled instantly and, after hanging up the phone, he went to grab a small board and a marker.

hey, creep, he showed her the careless handwriting with a smirk.

Y/N stuck her tongue out before grabbing her own board. you okay?

i’m fine, he replied with a shrug and a forced smile.

Y/N arched an eyebrow, i know you better than that.

His shoulders slumped, can i hang out with you for a while?

always. back door is open!

Less than five minutes later Ethan entered her room and plopped down on her bed, resting his head on his hand. Y/N noticed his eyes were a bit red and had dark bags under them, and yet he continued to be he most gorgeous human she had laid her eyes on.

“What’s wrong?” she asked softly, resisting the need to run her fingers through his wet brown hair.

“Coach killed us at practice today. My whole body hurts.” he mumbled.

“And…” she urged him to go on, knowing that was not it.

Ethan sighed. “I hate that you know me so well.” he groaned. “I fought with Mila.”

“Again.” she added, trying to hide her bitterness.

Mila and him had been dating for a couple of months, and she had managed to turn the ray of sunshine that Ethan used to be into a person who was always tired and in a gloomy mood. She had completely brought him down.

People at school loved the couple. And, on the outside, they seemed perfect. Ethan was the captain of the hockey team and the most good-looking boy at school, and Mila was the cheer captain and most good-looking girl at school—perfect pairing, right? On paper, yes.

But Y/N had the disgrace of witnessing most of their fights and the toxicity that filled the air whenever they were together. At the beginning, they had a normal relationship but eventually, the attention got the best of Mila and she turned into a controlling, jealous girlfriend who was also obsessed with painting the perfect image.

“Yeah… this time it was about prom.” he scoffed.

“What about it?”

“She came to practice and said we had to go buy her dress and my suit. Then she wants me to take fucking dancing classes because everything needs to be perfect and I can’t mess it up with my dance moves.”

“She’s going to have to buy tons of oil bottles for that. The Tin Man from Wizards of Oz can move better than you.”

Ethan laughed and threw her a pillow. “You’re such an asshole.”

Y/N smiled like the Cheshire cat. Ethan had no idea that his smile could practically light up the whole town, and it made her furious that Mila managed to take that away. Ever since they started dating, Ethan very rarely smiled around others.

“Anyways, the thing is I refused to do that. You know how tired I am after practice, and she got pissed and wouldn’t let me leave. I ended up holding back hockey practice and coach was furious.” he explained. “Then, after practice, she called and silly me thought—nice, she is going to apologize, but no. She wanted to see if I’d changed my mind. And that made me mad, so we started fighting about her interrupting practice and how furious she would be if I were to find her during cheer practice. Then she started yelling and I just hung up because my head fucking hurts.”

Y/N watched with sad eyes. What was he doing with a girl like that? She clearly didn’t care about him. “I’m sorry about your psycho of a girlfriend. You deserve better” she said, and he gave her a small smile. “There’s Tylenol on my drawer and the bottle is filled with water.”

“Thanks. You’re the best, did you know that? Being with you is lately the only thing that makes me feel at peace.”

“I love you, Eth, and I’ll always be here.”

The boy grabbed her hand and pulled her into his chest, hugging her tightly. “I love you, too.” he placed a kiss on the crown of her head. “Can I stay over?”

“Of course.”

Ethan fell asleep quickly, contrary to Y/N, whose thoughts kept her brain working like crazy. Ethan’s sweet words about her making him feel at peace should be heartwarming, but instead it made her heart hurt. Why couldn’t he see her the way she saw him? The way he saw Mila. Why couldn’t Ethan see that she was dying to be in Mila’s place and that he deserved so much better than her?

Ethan deserved to be with someone who treated him like he hung the moon, and instead he was settling for someone who overwhelmed him and brought him down, someone who cared more about what other people said than about his feelings and happiness. It made Y/N both sad and angry, and she prayed he would wake up and see he was worth more.

ETHAN ENTERED HIS ROOM AND DRAGGED HIS FEET TOWARDS HIS BED. He wanted to take a long nap and disconnect from the world, ignoring all the things that were overwhelming him lately. He wanted those feelings to be gone, he needed a good sleep and a good cry. And as if God had heard his prayers, the problems evaporated once his eyes caught sight of his best friend dancing around her room without a care in the world. He crossed his arms and watched with a smile, waiting for her to notice.

The girl stopped as soon as she felt eyes on her. Frowning, she quickly scribbled something on her blackboard.

i don’t do shows for free, quit looking

Laughing, he wrote back, what kind of shows do you do? i’m interested.

Y/N pretended to throw up and replied, i’m calling 911 pervert. And as he shook his head, she quickly wrote something else. you look stressed. wanna talk about it?

And as every afternoon, Ethan ended up sprawled on his best friend’s bed with her lying beside him. “First of all, I broke up with Mila.” he started, and Y/N’s heart stopped.

She tried her best not to smile at that, and managed to mutter “I’m sorry about that.”

Ethan shrugged, “It’s fine. We both know we weren’t really invested in that relationship. I’m stressed because she was furious, screaming something about ruining her chances of being prom queen and disappointing the school by our break-up.”

“And you feel bad about it.” Y/N stated, knowing him like the back of her hand.

“A little bit. I mean, I don’t get it, but prom is important to her for some reason. And now she needs to find another date.”

“That won’t be a problem, though. She’s literally the most gorgeous girl in school.”

“She’s not the most gorgeous girl in school.” he said, but quickly shook his head and moved on. “But it’s us who they want. Ethan and Mila, not Mila and some other guy.”

“Well, if it makes you feel so bad, you should go with her.” Y/N said out loud as her inner voice called her stupid in different languages.

Ethan frowned. “I don’t want to get back with her. And I thought you hated her.”

“I don’t hate her.” she argued.

“I heard you said you’d like her to recreate Regina George’s bus scene.” Ethan said, trying not to laugh at the guilty face she made.

“Look, everyone has intrusive thoughts.” she defended herself and Ethan bursted out laughing. “I’m not proud of it. But, moving on, I’m not telling you to get back with her, but just be her date to prom and then go your separate ways. We’re leaving for college soon, anyways.”

“I suppose you’re right.” he nodded. “That’s another reason why I’m stressed, college.”

“What about it?”

“I’m scared.” he confessed

“Why? Eth, you’re an stellar player. Lots of colleges already told you they’re interested.”

“I’m not scared of not getting into any college. I’m scared that we won’t end up in the same one.” he explained. And his eyes got glossy by just thinking about Y/N not being part of his every day life.

They had known each other since forever. They grew up together and it was in his plans to continue to grow alongside her. She was his person, and he knew he was her person too. She was his other half, he wasn’t complete without her. He rolled his eyes everytime he heard someone say that ‘we are our own person and it was wrong to believe someone complemented you’. He thought that was bullshit. Him and Y/N complemented each other and their lives wouldn’t be the same if they didn’t have each other. A part of them would be missing.

“I’m positive we will both end up on the same college. But even if that doesn’t happen, there’s absolutely no way that will be the end of our friendship, Eth. Come on, you really think our bond is not strong enough to handle a little distance?”

“You’re right.” he said, wiping his tears with the heel of his palm. “It still would suck not to have you there to annoy me every minute of the day.”

“Fuck you, Ethan.” she pinched his side, making him squirm. “And bold of you to assume I wouldn’t call you and text every one second.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way. I love you.” he hugged her tightly to his chest, breathing in the scent of her shampoo.

“Love you, too.” she whispered. She wanted to kiss him so badly she had to hide her face on his chest to die down the temptation.

“Hey, I never asked you. Who are you going to prom with?”

“With no one.”

Ethan frowned. “I can’t have that. We are going together.”

Her heart started beating faster. “You’re going with Mila.”

“I haven’t told her we can still go together. And I’m not going to, we are going together.”

“No.” she shook her head. The inner voices screaming at her again. “It’s important to her. I really couldn’t care less about prom. Don’t worry about it.”

“All of your friends have dates, Y/N/N. I know you don’t care about prom, but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a good time.” Ethan said, and she shrugged. “I don’t understand, though. I heard, unfortunately, the guys talking in the locker room. A lot of them were planning to ask you.”

“And they did, I just said I was going alone.”

“But why?”

Because I don’t want anyone but you, and I just turned your offer down. “I just don’t want to. Really, don’t worry about me. I don’t like parties anyway, so I won’t stay long. You will have to dance with me at least once, though.”

“Obviously.” he replied softly as he run his fingers through her soft hair until he fell asleep.

Meanwhile, Y/N laid wide awake, picturing that moment. Him, looking like a daydream in a suit, with his big hands around her body and her head on his hard chest, listening to the beat of his heart, which clearly won’t be beating as fast as hers. Yes, she didn’t know how she was going to survive that.

ETHAN STOOD NEXT TO MILA AS THEY TALKED WITH THEIR FRIENDS. Well, Mila did the talking and he was just standing there, looking anxiously at the entrance door, waiting for his best friend to arrive. Ethan had offered to drive her, but she instantly turned him down because there’s no way she was going to share the confined space with Mila.

“Your break-up lasted less than I expected.” one of Mila’s friend said.

Sensing Mila’s intention of not denying the statement, Ethan spoke first. “We aren’t together, we came as friends.”

“We’re always breaking up and making up, we both know you’ll take me back in no time.” Mila laughed.

“Mila.” he sighed. “We talked about this. I told you that we can still be each other’s date, but as long as it was clear that we are over for real. Don’t make me regret it.”

“Wow.” Zach, Ethan’s friend, said. His eyes were wide and his jaw was practically on the floor. And following his gaze, he found out the reason behind his reaction.

Ethan’s body stiffened and felt the blood rushing to his cheeks. Y/N walked through the gym, making her way towards her friends. No one, expect for his group, was paying attention to her. Why was no one paying attention to her?

She looked absolutely beautiful. Breathtaking would be most accurate word, because she took Ethan’s ability to breath as soon as his eyes landed on her figure. She was wearing a long, satin green dress. Her hair was up in a tidy bun, making her look elegant. Fuck, he couldn’t get his eyes off her, nor did he want to.

“Green is not her color.” Mila said between gritted teeth.

Ethan frowned, but his brown eyes were still glued to the girl across the room. “Every color is her color.”

“I’m going to ask her to dance with me.” Zach said confidently.

“Dude, get a hint. She told you she didn’t want to come with you.” another of Ethan’s friend said.

With that, Ethan finally looked away and instead glared at his friend. “You asked her?”

“Well, yeah. Can you blame me?” No, he couldn’t. But still, for some reason, it bothered him. “I can’t believe she said no.”

“Oh, come on. It’s obvious she was going to reject every offer. Well, anyone but one.” Mila said, and the boys’ curious glances landed on her. “What?”

“What are you talking about?” Zach asked.

Mila rolled her eyes. “Really? Literally everyone figured it out”

“Figure out what?” Ethan asked impatiently.

“She’s been in love with the same person for years.”

Ethan’s fists clenched and he felt like his whole body was on fire. “No way, she would’ve told me. We tell each other everything.”

Mila laughed. “It’s you, dumbass. She’s always been in love with you.”

Ethan froze and shook his head. “No. I would’ve- she should’ve… No.”

“Yes, Ethan. Ask anyone. I swear boys are so oblivious” she rolled her eyes. “It’s obvious she didn’t tell you because she knew you’d reject her. I mean, she is out of your league and you’ve never given her any signs that you might feel the same.”

Well, in that she’s right. But only because he had never let his mind wonder about being more because he didn’t want to ruin anything. Besides, he hadn’t seen her signs either and he also started dating Mila. But now… he could see them together. Now he couldn’t understand how he hadn’t thought about it before. After all, Y/N had always been his person—the one that understood him unlike anyone else, the one that made him laugh harder than anyone else, the one he always wanted to have by his side, the one who he belong with.

“She’s not out of my league.” he said, glaring at Mila. “I’m the one out of her league, hell, I don’t think anyone is really deserving of her! You know, she was the one that suggested I still should bring you here, because it was important to you. I asked her to be my date, and she said no. Even though she probably wanted to say yes. She’s that amazing, and I never saw her. What the fuck is wrong with me?”

Before anyone could say anything, Ethan let his feet guide him towards her. Y/N saw his silhouette making his way to her and her mouth broke into a smile. He did look like a daydream and the smile she loved was present on his face, shinier than ever.

"Hi, Eth." she stood up to hug him.

How could he have been so blind to notice it? The way her cheeks turned a light shade of red, her shy smile and the sparks in her eyes. Y/N was in love with him. "Hi. You look... like a daydream."

That made her blush even more. "Thank you. You look very handsome." Ethan smiled like a little kid, which made Y/N laugh. "What is going on? You're acting odd."

"What makes you say that?"

"I don't know, you're looking different."

"Is that bad?" Ethan frowned.

"No, it's a good different. You look happy. But what is happening?" she laughed with uncertainty. Ethan shook his head, trying to wipe the smile off his face. "Come on, you're making me nervous."

my love was as cruel as the cities i lived in

"First we have to dance to your favorite song." Ethan said, grabbing her hand and guiding her to the dance floor.

Just like she had it pictured it in her mind, her best friend's arms were wrapped around her waist, her hands resting on his broad shoulders and her head lying on his chest. But, contrary to what she had thought, his heart was beating inexplicably fast.

i don't wanna look at anything else now that i saw you

"I love you, Y/N" Ethan whispered in her ear. He felt her shoulders tense and she slowly raised her head to look at him.

It wasn't like any other previous I love you's, there was something about the way he said it—so softly and vulnerable—that gave her the hope that there was another meaning, that it was another type of i love you.

"Ethan..."

been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night

"I do. I really do love you. I am in love with you, and I'm really sorry."

"What are you sorry for?"

and now i see daylight, i only see daylight

"For not realizing it earlier. For not seeing how you really felt."

Y/N widened her eyes. He knew. "Ethan... don't."

"Don't what?"

"You're confused. You don't love me like that, I don't want your sympathy. You just think you love me because you don't want to reject me." she said. He opened his mouth to argue, but she cut him off. "I promise you that our friendship won't change. I've always known it wasn't reciprocated, and I've come in terms with it."

Ethan just smiled. "Are you done overthinking? Because you have two options—you can keep on trying to convince yourself I don't love you and that my heart hasn't been skipping since you walked into this room," he put her hand on his heart. "or you can accept the truth—that I love you and I want you more than anything in the world—and let me kiss you while your song is still playing." he tilted his head down, nose brushing hers. "What is it, Y/N? One or two?"

"Two" she whispered.

He smirked "Good girl."

The kiss stopped time. When they finally pulled away, they stared at each other completely awestruck. Taylor Swift wasn't playing anymore, and they truly didn't have a clue how much time they had spent tasting each other. What they did know is that nothing had ever felt more right.

"Okay, enough show. Let's get out of here, I want you all to myself." he said pressing kisses to her neck.

"I want ice cream first, then we can make out."

"Whatever my girlfriend wants, she gets." with one last kiss, they walked out of the room hand in hand. “By the way, I have always thought you were the most gorgeous girl in school.”

[sepublic]

Continuing my ramblings on Predator (1987), there's an interesting choice of cinematography when the protagonists start fighting back against their titular antagonist; Once Anna explains the Predator's schtick as a chameleon, our heroes begin making new traps meant to fool the Predator. And as they do, there's some pretty choice shots emphasizing the bulging muscles of characters like Dillon and the like. Dillon is interesting especially given he's framed as the least masculine of the guys due to being a dishonest pencil-pusher; Here, it seems as if everyone, even Dillon, is reclaiming their masculinity with this chance to fight back. With this chance to turn back the odds and restore their conventional status as action heroes.....

And then we know how it all goes down; The Predator breaks free of the trap, and kills its last four victims of the film to leave only Dutch and Anna. The Predator as a dark reflection of the characters' machismo makes more sense when you consider how he can mimic the voices of the others, and the wound that puts him down is identical to that of his final victim Poncho; Both are felled by a log trap.

From the perspective of the Predator, other characters' voices become noticeable high-pitched; I wonder if this is, in a way, meant to show how even a badass like Dutch is emasculated in the eyes of the Yautja. The line between Predator and the protagonists is further blurred when Dutch achieves his own form of cloaking that is also sabotaged when he comes into contact with water; He learns to fight more like the Predator, relying on stealth, ambush, and the environment around him to hide and attack. So now the Predator becomes the hunted too. Its final words are to repeat Dutch's only lines back at him before laughing in Billy's hearty voice.

You know that one post circulating around here, where people joke about what if the Predator was more the exception to his home's culture, rather than the norm? What if he was the Yautja equivalent to bored middle-class dudes who decide to go on a hunting trip for fun, to collect trophies from lions and other animals that are otherwise harmless and victimized, to flex how 'badass' he is? And meanwhile everyone else back home is rolling their eyes because what a loser. What if that's really just what the Predator is meant to symbolize, in the context of the original film at least; People who like to kill and hunt to show off how masculine they are.

But in the end, it's quite easy and cowardly, arguably, to rely on a cloaking device, whilst sniping oblivious targets from afar. Beforehand, I wonder if we could take into account how animals are treated by the human protagonists beforehand; One of the characters kicking a bird aside, Mac stabbing a scorpion. Them flexing their macho attitudes by killing an animal that for all intents and purposes is pretty helpless against the one who gets it. And then the roles are reversed where the human protagonists become the game for the Predator to make trophies out of.

I find it fascinating Dutch's reaction when Mac admits that Blain was his friend; You get the sense that this is quite uncharacteristic a thing for Mac to do. Nowadays it seems like a pretty obvious and understandable thing for any guy to do, but for someone like Mac, it IS quite the confession of emotional vulnerability here. Plus there's Poncho being a sad sopping wet cat for the rest of the film, once Hawkins is the first to die.

If Predator is a slasher film, then it subscribes to its own version of the rules, just as it has its own version of a 'final girl' in muscled badass Dutch, played by Arnold Schwarzenegger. You know how those who have premarital sex die first? It seems Predator operates on similar rules; Hawkins makes crude jokes about female genitalia and is killed first. Blain calls everyone else the f-slur and proclaims his own sexual prowess, in addition to being your typical badass macho man who's too tough to feel pain, and then he's unceremoniously killed off pretty early too. This is despite, or rather because of, being the "big guy" who wields a giant mini-gun.

Mac and Billy are stoic, but Mac unravels psychologically and sings lyrics about objectifying a woman shortly before his death, and Billy remains rattled throughout by the Predator's presence, even openly admitting to Poncho that he's afraid. And of course there's Poncho, who is on the verge of tears 24/7 once the movie's genre shifts, voice constantly wavering.

On a final note, one could be half-joking about homoerotic undertones between Mac and Blain, at least on Mac’s end. Which could be an interesting discussion in and of itself when you also account for Blain’s use of the f-slur and how he’s the most stereotypically masculine of the group. Because I know the military is known for being a place where homosexuality was often discovered and explored. How would that factor into the larger themes of masculinity in this film, I wonder?

[withlovesstuff]

until you remember

fem!reader 18+ DARK fic- Dubcon, Noncon, Predator/Prey, Eventual smut, gross behavior, stalking.

It’s always dark, in the dreams. A cover of night so black you can’t see in front of you, it makes your feet stumble like a newborn fawn. The moss from the forest floor burrows its way in between your toes, you grimace at the feeling. 

You must keep moving. It is echoed in your mind by a voice much like your own. 

The sleeping gown that had once kept you warm, its only job had been to act as a barrier between your soft skin and thick sheets that enveloped you. But, your gown is now in tatters, your barrier ripped to shreds, the cotton torn by branches, thorns, hands. 

The night air washes over your exposed legs and chest, so cold. Why did you ever leave your bed? You were so warm.  Your mind can’t seem to remember the reason, whatever coaxed you from the safety of your bed is gone, erased from your mind, but you still try to remember.

You were reading, then the candle flickered, the draft, yes the draft. Lifting from the bed, you had gone over to the window. To close it, you needed to close the window because of the draft, yes. But when you reached the window, the air was still, there was no wind, it was quiet, almost like the forest surrounding your home was holding its breath- 

Shooting pain from your head pulls you away from the scrambling thoughts,your brain doesn’t want to remember, your brain hurts when it remembers. 

You bring one hand to your face and outstretch the other in front of you, blindly searching for something to grasp, to lean against. You're so tired.  

Your legs are burning and you don’t know if it is because of the running or the cold, your hand is wet, your exposed skin is numb-

Why is your hand wet? 

Your outstretched hand finally meets something dry and rough- bark, a tree! 

Lifting your hand from your face, you hold it in front of you, but you still can’t see. 

Frustration eats at you, but your brain screams at you.

You must keep moving. 

The air burns your lungs, but you continue to suck in breaths, desperate for your heart rate to slow. A part of you is always scared when you can hear your heart beating in your ears, because that means they can hear it all the better.

You continue your run much faster than before since you had tumbled onto a dirt path, that means it leads to something right? It must! It has to! 

Loose rocks scrape your feet, you want to cry, you're surprised you haven’t yet. Your desperate, your body is not going to be able to run much longer, you need to find someone, anyone. That’s it. You’d pray to god, but after feeling those things touch you, your sure he can’t answer you. 

You crane your neck when you hear it. A sound you can’t describe, a sound your ears have never before heard. You see the waning moon, so pretty, you wonder why it isn’t giving you any  light, you wonder if it’s real at all, because it seems to flicker. Much like your candle did, however this time there’s something in front of the moon, blocking it from your view, but only for a moment then it falls, revealing the moon right where it was before, still not giving you any light. Picking your jaw up, you have time to take a sad half step before it crashes down in front of you, shaking the earth under your feet. 

“Hennnn, slow down, aye?” 

Slow down? Why on earth would you slow down? This wasn’t a playful game of tag, this was strictly cat and mouse. Only whatever was just growling words at you isn’t a cat. 

 They’re trying to swallow you whole. For fun.The alarms in your head are screaming at you so loudly you can barely hear the shaking of branches surrounding the area. You surprised yourself with how fast you bolted up and over the tree that had landed in front of you. Even with the vast amount of fear coursing through you, you hadn’t froze.

You must keep moving.

The brain in your head repeats those incessant words over and over

You're not far, keep moving.

even as scarred hands wrap around your waist

You’re not far, keep moving.   

even as your dirty feet are lifted from the forest floor

You’re not far, keep moving.

Your mind still tries to give you hope.

You never make it, in the dreams. You always wake up right as whatever was chasing you finally catches you, a part of you thinks it’s your brain finally saving you. You always breathe out a ‘thankyou’ to yourself as you wipe the sweat from your brow. You never want to know what happens next. And as you ready yourself for work the dream slowly fades, before nestling itself warmly in the back of your head. Inevitably you do have it again, but until then, the dream sits quietly, only allowing two intricate details to claw at your skull. 

Two pairs of eyes. 

You remember them vividly.

You remember mahogany with honey specs looking at you through thick blonde lashes. 

You remember blown out pupils adorning angry sea irises, so much so that you lift your tongue and feel grains of sand pricking the roof of your mouth.

The eyes haunt you so beautifully, not only do they plague your dreams, you swear that sometimes it seems like they’re on you for real. And funny enough they are. 

They watch you often, mostly to make sure no one thinks about taking what they had claimed so long ago.

On occasion they also break into your apartment. Some of them choose to bury their nose in the panties that sit on top of your hamper before pocketing the thin lace, some lick the small vibrator that's hidden at the bottom of your drawer like your some kind of prude, some just to jerk off on your sheets, while those more restrained go to your fridge and spit in the coffee creamer you use every morning.

They thumb through your journal too, angry curses falling from some of their lips, because for the life of them, they can’t figure out why you remember two pairs of eyes and not four:(

[mrclairdycat]

HUMAN THINGS THAT WOULD SHOCK/CONFUSE WALLY DARLING: A THREAD.

Slight gore warning, I think?

People waxing and plucking their hair.

Nail art. He would love it.

Tumblr. If you gave him tumblr he would end up scrolling all day to see art, and spam post his own. I'm sure he would also feel obliged to comment under every post to compliment the art, he's such a nice little fella

Organs. He would find them silly and interesting. You would show him pictures of organs and he would ask things like:"do you have different colored organs? Can I see yours?"

The fact that we have to go to the bathroom? Imagine being like: "Yeah whenever we consume things we need to make it go out of our bodies aswell." He would be like: "... Neat." He would then play by flushing the toilet numerous times, he would find it fun. He probably would end up clogging it up because he tries to see how many things it can flush.

Human teeth.

Iphones. He would like it since the logo is an apple. He wouldn't play with the phone he would just add it to his collection of apple things.

Videogames? He thinks that the character in the screen is real and he's controlling them. You explain how they don't exist. "How can you be sure about that?" he asks, "cause we make them, they're just codes." "But how can you be sure they just dont know they're alive since they can't tell you?" he asks again: you start rethinking the many times you tortured characters in The Sims.

Pokemon. He would think the creatures are real too. He would lose his shit to Applin. He would ask: "Can I have him?" and you'll buy him the plushie and say they don't live here cause you don't have the heart to tell him it doesn't exist.

Certain animals?? He would be confused on why don't they speak. He sees them as people, he would be like "Why did you lick me? That's weird," to a dog... and then lick him back cause he thinks its a human world thing. You say:"thats just how he communicates affection, " and he would start licking people too to show his affection in this language.

Emojis. If he started messaging he would spam emojis. Probably thinks audio messages are like calls, and you're left with a spam of audio messages that are like: "Hello? Hellooo? Why aren't you saying anything?"

Digital art. He would look in awe. "I have unlimited colors? That's fun."

Sensory videos. He would be like an ipad kid. His face is on the screen watching the videos all day. ShApeS anD CoLoRs.

Sensory toys. He would love them aswell.

Deodorant. "We spray this on our armpits," you say. "Why?" he asks. "Because we sweat and produce smelly liquids," you reply. "... Ew."

Showers. He would be like a cat, he would hate showers at first. He doesn't understand why you would want to be wet. You would then randomly find him standing in the shower with an intense fixiated look on his face as the warm/hot water pours down on him. He likes the feeling.

Speaking about warmness, he would absolutely love how warm humans are. He would just randomly hug you cause he likes how warm and comforting it feels. Probably would like sleeping with you aswell and cuddle.

Human movies and tv shows. He would think those are things happening for real. You explain that it's like theatre. "... Wow, your theatre is very realistic," he says.

Wars. He would be so confused. "Why would you hurt your neighbours? That's bad, just discuss things pacifically." Probably would make him sad. He wants everyone to be friends and an happy community.

Meat. I'm pretty sure in Welcome Home they only eat fruits and vegetables? Idk. He would ask:"Since humans are also animals, do you eat eachoth-" "No. That's illegal," you reply. "... What's an illegal?" he asks. "It's a rule: humans are prohibited from eating each other," you respond. "... Since I'm not a human can I eat one-" "NO."

People making out. He would stare at them. He finds it gross but interesting, he doesn't view it as a intimate sexual thing just a weird thing human do.

Certain social rules. Why can't you just say hi to someone and speak to them as if they're your friend? Why is it rude to stare?

An apple factory. Like the fruit. So... many... apples. He would be sad some apples get thrown away and tries to 'save' them.

Blood. You would try to explain it, he understands it as just red water circuling inside your body. He would play with blood or finger paint with it and won't understand why that is an horrifying image.

Spotify. Unlimited music?? You can save your favourites to listen to them whenever you want? Wow.

Pollution. He would go crazy and blow up. WHY WOULD YOU HARM AND LITTER YOUR HOME?? AAAARGH!!

Homeless people. You're telling me there are people who don't have a home? Everyone needs a home! Why don't they give them a home?!

Preschool. A place where you spend your entire day fingerpainting, reading books, making stuff and dancing? All of the things he loves the most. He would infiltrate into one, the teacher would probably call the police, he would get asked questions. He just wanted to have fun too....

Discovering that in grammar saying "the most" without anything else is just incorrect and doesn't make sense. He doesn't like being corrected about it. It's his thing. Don't correct him.

Cuss words. He would be shocked at how many cuss words he hears daily: watch your profanity.

Space?? People being on planets?? His mind would blow up.

Birth. You... make humans?? You create yourself? What do you mean they grow inside of you? How? Does it just randomly happen? You would rather die than teach him about sex. You say that you were kidding and a stork brings the babies for those who want one, it's their job. "Ohhh, that makes more sense," he says. Then he sees a cat or dog giving birth and just implodes.

Therapists. He would like them cause they would be the closest thing to his neighbours. He doesn't understand, however, why they demand to get paid for being friendly.

History. You're telling me there was a time when your kind didn't exist? And you know that because of just... history? How? What??

Earrings. To him it just looks like you're stabbing yourself.