#j.j. wolf

[stateofsport211]

Columbus Ch R1: Kyle Edmund [Q] def. J.J. Wolf [4] 6-1, 7-6(4) Match Stats

📸 ATP official website

J.J. had fair chances when he tried to turn the match around from some forehand passes, but he was unable to contain K. Edmund's aggression as the match progressed. The latter's shot accuracy helped him to produce some crucial winners, outplaying the American fourth seed in the first set while cleaning up his act during the second-set tie-break through his deep, clean returning. Consequently, even though both players converted 25% of their break points, K. Edmund produced more break points with 12 as he got more offensive during the match.

Furthermore, K. Edmund also had solid service games throughout the match. Scoring 6 aces than J.J.'s 5, the British qualifier had an outstanding first serve winning percentage with 80%, which helped him get out of several troubles, including the moments he faced break points. However, even if both players double-faulted thrice, J.J. became error-prone starting the third shot, which faded his second serve winning percentage 26% below K. Edmund throughout the match, thus affecting some momentums the Brit could hold by then.

A possibly fruitful second-round match awaits K. Edmund as he will face Dominic Stricker, who also knocked out his fellow comeback-from-injury player Ryan Peniston 6-3, 7-5. With rocky comebacks often occurring between both players, their offensives became the aspect of interest considering how early both players anticipated the ball, where final shot execution also being emphasized. This could be an intriguing affair, with every option on the table before the match is called. Should be a fun way to continue this round!

[mariocki]

Nightbeast (1982)

"Listen, I've been thinking. I hate this idea of us running out of town when -"

"We're beaten, Jamie. Guns have no effect on that thing."

"Guns don't, I know that, but if we could hit that thing with twenty or thirty thousand volts of electricity we might be able to stop it!"

[redemptivexheroics]

​❛ i don’t have enough money for chicken nugget . ❜ raven

@roguexpogue

Iconic Vines Sentence Meme

"They're literally like ninety-nine scents, about a buck and some change after taxes; you can't afford a six-piece, damn Maybank" Raven laughed, not at the fact he couldn't afford nuggets but that he said that with a straight face.

[zvdvdlvr]

from the club

Derek’s wolf whistle made you roll your eyes and try to slip into your seat without drawing too much attention. “Damn, mama,” he sang teasingly, eyeing you up and down.

“Derek Morgan! I ought to-“

“Whoa!”

You glared at Spencer, trying to ifnore the way his eyes trailed over your cleavage. “It’s like you guys have never even been in the presence of a female before,” you snark sarcastically. Secretly, though, you feel complimented that such aesthetically pleasing people thought you looked good.

Emily, Jennifer, Penelope, and Rossi were later than Hotch surprisingly. Aaron strode in next, laying a stack of files on the table. He sat down at his regular spot and turned to make conversation until the other arrived when he turned and saw you. His lips drew thinly over his face as he watched you reach over the table to grab a file. He swallowed and averted his eyes from you when you sat back in your seat. Hotch felt like a pervert and averted his mind to the more pressing matter. Dead bodies, knives, murder, he repeated to himself- trying to draw blood away from his crotch.

J.J., Penelope, and Emily arrived next. “Coffee for you all, my precious gems!” Penny sang, placing the team’s favorite brews in front of them. After she placed yours down her eyes gleamed and she raised her eyebrows. “Did you call-“

“Penelope!” You hollered, turning away from the red-head with a laugh. 

She just giggled and wiggled her eyebrows. As Emily took her place beside you, she leaned in to whisper in your ear, “I’m no better than the men here, y/n. You look hot.” 

You swatted her away and waited for J.J. to start the briefing. Emily snickered beside you.

There was really nothing professional about being called into work wearing low-rise jeans and a lacey tank top. But it wasn’t your fault- some of your college friends had stopped in the city and wanted to go to the club and wouldn’t take no as an answer.

Rossi showed up right before Hotch said his favorite phrase (read: “wheels up in 30”). You collected your file and started out of the room.

“Good lo- y/n!”

You whipped around to see Penelope rushinf towards you. “Wh-What?”

“You’ve surprised me more times today than I thought possible, darling girl. Turn around! I didn’t know you had ink!” 

You breathed out a sigh of relief and tried to ignore the feeling of her cold fingers tracing over the black ink just above your jeans. “I have some on the mid back too,” you said quietly.

“Impressive,” Rossi- of all people- hummed. “One of my ex wives roped me into getting a matching tattoo with her. The pain was somethinf else and the aftercare was hell. Rookie, here has a high pain tolerance.” He patted your practically bare shoulder and walked by without another word.

Emily purred lowly as she walked by, laughing at the way you flipped her off in return.

“You know, Jeffery Dahmer didn’t consume people that had tattoos… He said that the ‘tattoos made the meat taste like… shit’,” Reid spouted.

The way Spencer paused before saying shit was endearing. Maybe it was your attraction to nerds, but you felt particularly flattered at the weight of his gaze on you. “That’s interesting, Spencer,” you replied quietly. “Did you know the oldest recorded tattoo ink recipe required insect eggs?”

Spencer just hummed.

“I- uh,” Aaron cleared his throat. You stepped back from Penelope’s hands. “I imagine you have more professional attire?”

Your cheeks flushed. “Yes, Hotch. I’m really sorry, my friends convinced me to go out with them, you know, and I-“

Hotch chuckled and held his hands up. “It’s okay, y/n. What you do on your own time is your business,” he said.

You wrung your hands. “Thanks, Hotch.”

“No problem, y/n.” Hotch started to walk away and you felt Derek’s arm wrap around your shoulder. “Nice ink,” he called back to you. 

“I’ll see you on the plane, y/n,” Spencer told you with a wave. You smiled back at him and watched him run a hand through his hair as he walked away.

“Lover boy’s gotta thing for you, y/n,” Derek told you, a shit eating grin on his face. “And Hotch too, if I took a guess. I think you made the old man pop a bo-“

“Derek Morgan!”

You shoved him off of you and tried to ignore his gleeful laughter.

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

🌈 Queer Books Coming Out in April 2024 🌈

🌈 Good morning, my bookish bats! Struggling to keep up with all the amazing queer books coming out this month? Here are a FEW of the stunning, diverse queer books you can add to your TBR before the year is over. Remember to #readqueerallyear! Happy reading!

[ Release dates may have changed. ]

❤️ Spring on the Peninsula - Ery Shin 🧡 When I Arrived at the Castle - Emily Carroll 💛 Bloodline - Jenn Alexander 💚 Grey Dog - Elliott Gish 💙 Every Time You Hear That Song - Jenna Voris 💜 I'm in Love with the Villainess v. 2 - Inori and Hanagata ❤️ The Caravaggio Syndrome - Alessandro Giardino 🧡 Leather, Lace, and Locs - Anne Shade 💛 Firebugs - Nico Bulling 💙 I Married My Female Friend v.2 - Shio Usui 💜 The Final Curse of Ophelia Cray - Christine Calella 🌈 A Sweet Sting of Salt - Rose Sutherland ❤️ The Selected Shepherd: Poems - Reginald Shepherd 🧡 Rough Trade - Katrina Carrasco 💛 Aubrey McFadden is Never Getting Married - Georgia Beers 💚 Taming of a Rebel - Eada Friesian 💙 Dayspring - Anthony Oliveira 💜 The Titanic Survivors Book Club - Timothy Schaffert ❤️ Orphia And Eurydicius - Elyse John 🧡 The Fellowship of Puzzlemakers - Samuel Burr 💛 A Good Happy Girl - Marissa Higgins 💙 Winnie Nash Is Not Your Sunshine - Nicole Melleby 💜 Here We Go Again - Alison Cochrun 🌈 Women! In! Peril! - Jessie Ren Marshall

❤️ Blood City Rollers - V. P. Anderson and Tatiana Hill 🧡 The Prospects - KT Hoffman 💛 Crazy Like a Fox: Adventures in Schizophrenia - Christi Furnas 💚 WATCHNIGHT - Cyree Jarelle Johnson 💙 Love From The Sidelines - Tuesday Harper 💜 The Pleasure in Pain - Roxie Voorhees ❤️ Mal - Perla Zul 🧡 The Black Girl Survives in This One - Desiree S. Evans and Saraciea J. Fennell 💛 Darker by Four - June C.L. Tan 💙 Otherworldly - F.T. Lukens 💜 Hearts Still Beating - Brooke Archer 🌈 Tryst Six Venom - Penelope Douglas

❤️ Teenage Dirtbags - James Acker 🧡 The Heart Wants What It Wants - D.M. Batten 💛 Something Kindred by Ciera Burch 💚 Sheine Lende - Dr. Darcie Little Badger & Rovina Cai 💙 Rainbow Overalls - Maggie Fortuna 💜 Flowers for Dead Girls - Abigail Collins ❤️ Canto Contigo - Jonny Garza Villa

❤️ Court of Wanderers - Rin Chupeco 🧡 Molten Death - Leslie Karst 💛 Triad Magic - ‘Nathan Burgoine 💚 You, Me and Bad Movies - Twoony 💙 The Faithful Dark - Cate Baumer 💜 A Case for Discretion - Ashley Moore ❤️ Party of Fools - Cedar McCloud 🧡 The Last Love Song - Kalie Holford 💛 This is Me Trying - Racquel Marie 💙 Dear Wendy - Ann Zhao 💜 Sun Eater - Dre Levant 🌈 The Breakup Lists - Adib Khorram

❤️ Bad Dream - Nicole Maines & Rye Hickman 🧡 If We Were Stars - Eule Grey 💛 The Broken Lines of Us - Shia Woods 💚 Eye of the Ouroboros - Megan Bontrager 💙 Henry Henry - Allen Bratton 💜 Dear Bi Men - JR Yussuf ❤️ Paige Not Found - Jen Wilde 🧡 Mechanic Shop Femme’s Guide to Car Ownership - Chaya Milchtein 💛 Wide Awake Now - David Levithan 💙 Merciless Saviors - H.E. Edgmon 💜 Smile and Be a Villain - Yves Donlon 🌈 Crash Landing - Charmaine Anne Li

❤️ Call Forth a Fox - Markelle Grabo 🧡 Central Avenue Poetry Prize 2024 - Beau Adler 💛 Good Bones - Aurora Rey 💚 Curiosities - Anne Fleming 💙 Someone You Can Build a Nest in - John Wiswell 💜 Revisiting Summer Nights - Ashley Bartlett ❤️ Bright Spring - Emmaline Strange

❤️ Girls Night - I.S. Belle 🧡 Late Bloomer - Mazey Eddings 💛 Withered - A.G.A. Wilmot 💚 A Wolf Steps in Blood - Tamara Jerée 💙 It Always Finds Me - Anthology 💜 Dulhaniyaa - Talia Bhatt ❤️ Moon Dust in My Hairnet - JR Creaden 🧡 Blood Justice - Terry J. Benton-Walker 💛 Relinquishing Control - J.J. Arias

❤️ Selamlik - Khaled Alesmael 🧡 Houseswap 101 - Jaime Clevenger 💛 Earthflown by Frances Wren & Litarnes 💚 Covenant v.1 - LySandra Vuong 💙 Honey - Victor Lodato 💜 The Dragonfly Gambit - A.D. Sui ❤️ Double Dyno - Sharon K Angelici & Taylor Rose

[70s80sandbeyond]

Chuck Norris as J.J. McQuade in "Lone Wolf McQuade" (1983)

[serpentinesheldonserpentine]

31-40

Herbie Hancock: The New Standard

Howlin Wolf: Moanin in the Moonlight

Ike and Tina Turner: Dynamite

Isaac Hayes: Shaft

J. Geils: Full House

J.J. Cale: Naturally

Jackson Browne: Running On Empty

Jim Sullivan: U.F.O. 

Jimi Hendrix: Are You Experienced?

John Lee Hooker: Burnin’

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

I have to know. Do the fauximorphs from A-Town have battle morphs and if so, what are they?

Battle morphs, you say. Battle morphs. Oh no, there are never six exotic animals onscreen at the same time. For that matter, there are never two exotic animals onscreen at the same time. There is sometimes a lion. There is a German Shepherd that has been dyed to look like a coyote. Sometimes we are told after the fact that the lion was Trina in morph; sometimes we're told it was Liam. The coyote is Gina's favored morph, except for all the times it was Brandon in coyote morph. At one point the same stock footage of a wolf running past the camera plays six times in a row, and the thought-speak voiceover tries to convince us that this is six separate wolf morphs.

Other ways the show gets around the fact that all its animals have to be a) stock footage, b) tame, or c) That One Lion We Pay $2500 an Hour to Wander Around Our Sets:

Crystal often shows up to battles as a horse. Why she chooses horse over wolf is unclear.

At one point J.J. flings out an arm and yells "Poison attack!" and a controller extra falls over dead. The camera cuts back to J.J., who is now holding what is clearly a garter snake that was meant to have come out of his sleeve.

Brandon's favored battle morph is... Mopsy. The 15-lb dog. We're told he's defeated many hork-bajir-controllers in this shape, although this is of course never shown onscreen.

For that matter, Liam is sometimes on the phone with a hork-bajir friend, but we never see the other side of the conversation and he has a line lamenting that he never got her permission to morph her.

Liam-the-parakeet is sometimes an actual parakeet that's been added to a fight (usually by having the bird land on an extra's head, followed by the extra pretending to be grievously injured). But there are also loads of times when Gina and J.J. just go "Look up in the sky! It's Liam!" and we just have to take their word for it.

Whether or not guinea pigs count as exotic animals, the general consensus is that the guinea pig in a tiny skunk costume is Gina's most adorable battle morph.

For that matter, the script strongly implies that Gina isn't human, and she's in morph during all of her onscreen appearances. But we never see her out of morph, and she often goes straight from human shape to some other morph. Gina's True Form is thus the subject of infinite fandom speculation, from the boring explanations (she's obviously meant to be an andalite) to the canny ones (Marco thinks she's a chee) to the sweet ones (she's a deserter yeerk Liam rescued) to the buckwild ones (her original form cannot appear before humans without driving them mad).

[meme-streets]

il cattivo.

01 dead before dawn – vaguess 02 sinister purpose – creedence clearwater revival 03 big in japan – tom waits 04 people are strange – the doors 05 thirteen – johnny cash 06 sympathy for the devil – the rolling stones 07 whistlin' past the graveyard – tom waits 08 i'm the devil – the william loveday intention 09 old judge jones – les dudek 10 the snake – al wilson 11 money talks – j.j. cale 12 dead man, dead man – bob dylan 13 hoist that rag – tom waits 14 wolf teeth – jd mcpherson 15 rotten to the core – the builders and the butchers 16 bad seed sown – the bellfuries 17 love of hate – st. john green 18 riders in the sky – ronnie dawson 19 god's gonna cut you down – johnny cash 20 the werewolf song – michael hurley 21 death don't have no mercy (live) – hot tuna

the pity is, when i'm paid, i always see my job through.

[liberty1776]

J.J. Carrell returns to DailyClout in an interview with Dr. Naomi Wolf to discuss the horrors of recent events in Israel, the current crisis at the border of the United States, and the increasing concern that 80,000 plus SIAs are somewhere in America. SIAs are illegal immigrants who are terrorists or aligned with terrorists. Carrell explains that, under normal conditions, when an SIA is apprehended, everything stops. Law enforcement is notified up to the level of the FBI. The SIA is taken into custody or deported and everyone knows where he is. Now, nothing really prevents an orchestrated uprising of … Continue reading →

The Enemy is inside the gates!

[stateofsport211]

📸 🎥 ATP official website

K. Edmund continued his aggression from the first set as J.J. tried to step up, but the former closed this match sharply at the end. This second set started from the former trying to overcome some erratic service games that led to the British qualifier's break points before he held his serves to 2-2, and he notably fired a forehand passing shot 2 points in before holding his serves to 4-3.

By then, J.J. hoped to inflict more damage as he began the eighth game with another pass, but K. Edmund closed the game with a massive hold to 4-4. This allowed the latter to assert more pressure as the former's double faults in that game did not help, with a third-shot forehand error causing the break of serve to 5-4. As a result, K. Edmund earned his chance to serve for the match, but even if an intuitive forehand winner saved the first break point, his forehand errors caused the fourth seed's break-back to 5-5.

Two service game holds later, the tie-breaker became unavoidable to determine the outcome of the flow. J.J.'s +1 forehand error generated K. Edmund's mini-break to 3-1 before the latter held his serves 2 points later thanks to his +1 backhand down-the-line winner (5-1). A third-shot forehand error from K. Edmund caused J.J. to mini-break again to 5-2, followed by 2 service game holds (1 with a working pass) to 5-4, but K. Edmund served it out at the end to create and convert his match points, taking the second set 7-6(4) to secure his spot in the second round.

[darkside-of-the-multiverse]

//New muses added:

Fang (Goodbye Volcano High)

Claire Russell (Cyberpunk)

Judy Alvarez (Cyberpunk)

Lucy Kushinada (Cyberpunk)

Panam Palmer (Cyberpunk)

Sasha Yakovleva (Cyberpunk)

J.J. Macfield (The Missing)

Countess Daraku (Fortnite)

Highwire (Fortnite)

Piper Pace (Fortnite)

Shimmerdusk (Fortnite)

Faith (The Wolf Among Us)

Nerissa (The Wolf Among Us)

Ayeka Aoki (Crush Crush)

Charlie Morningstar (Hazbin Hotel)

Cherri Bomb (Hazbin Hotel)

Lightning Farron (Final Fantasy XIII)

Mira Nova (Buzz Lightyear of Star Command)

Tambry (Gravity Falls)

Vee Noceda (The Owl House)

Black Cat (Marvel)

Black Widow (Marvel)

Jubilee (Marvel)

Peni Parker (Marvel)

Gogo Tomago (Big Hero 6)

Honey Lemon (Big Hero 6)

Gwen Tennyson (Older) (Ben 10)

Saki Konishi (Persona 4)

Yuko Nishiwaki (Persona 3)

[hamstergomez]

This is a fic I wrote on Wattpad.

Hamster and Gretel returned Kevin to J.J. McWeekend's where his date was. Hiromi was walking out. Kevin ran up to her with a bouquet of flowers.

Kevin: Hiromi!

Hiromi: Kevin! Where were you?

Kevin: I'm so sorry! I was taking care of my little sister and―

Hiromi: Aw, that was so sweet...the first time I heard that excuse in the Duck Boyz concert. Kevin, I think you're a really nice guy, and I like like you, but I don't think this is going to work out.

Hiromi walked away, leaving the trio alone. To make things worse, the Aliens told him he wasn't supposed to have powers. One week later...

It was bedtime and Gretel walked by Kevin's room and heard Kevin calling Fred.

Kevin: Fred, thanks for helping us fight Bookworm. Who knew his weakness was boring textbooks.

Fred: Trust me, I can't believe I'm saying this but I'm glad my class was having a test. Anyway, how you feeling?

Kevin: Huh?

Fred: About Hiromi breaking up with you?

Kevin: It's because of that stupid jerk!

Gretel sulked away back to bed. Ever since that night, Gretel blamed herself for Kevin not only losing his date but for him not getting powers. She didn't hear the whole conversation.

Kevin: Professor Exclamation is so annoying.

Gretel wrote a note and put it next to Hamster's cage where he was sleeping. She opened the window and tearfully flew off.

The next day, Hamster woke up. He noticed Gretel missing.

Hamster: Did I oversleep? It's 6:30?

Hamster finally noticed the note.

Hamster: Oh no!

Kevin woke up to see Hamster hovering over him.

Kevin: Hamster?

Hamster: Read this note.

"Kevin, thank you for being a wonderful big brother. I'm sorry for everything. You deserved those powers instead of me. Goodbye forever. Love Gretel."

Kevin: No...she didn't...

Hamster: She must've ran off.

Later, Bailey walked out of her room and saw her parents on the phone distressed.

Roman: I hope you find her. (Hangs up)

Bailey: Dad, who was that?

Roman: Mr Grant...He called because...your friend Gretel went missing last night.

Those words hit Bailey hard as tears welled up in her eyes.

Bailey: I have to find her!

Michelle: No, it's too dangerous. We don't want to lose you too. Don't worry, the cops are going to send out search parties.

Bailey was real worried. Gretel could've been captured by a dangerous villain but she couldn't tell her parents that her friend was Superhero Gretel.

As for Gretel herself, she was faraway. She was in Coyote Woods in Danville.

Gretel: Nice woods. I'm sure I won't destroy the life of anyone here.

Gretel walked through the woods and heard footsteps.

Gretel: Who's there?!

Nothing...Gretel assumed it was her imagination and walked off. The footsteps continued. Gretel turned around.

Gretel: Show yourself!

From out of the shadows came a werewolf.

Gretel: Oh great, a villain out here?

The Werewolf punched her and she blacked out.

Back with the others...

Carolina and Dave were out searching for Gretel while Kevin and Fred were in the apartment watching the news.

Veronica Hill: The police are still looking for Gretel Grant Gomez. Even Hamster and Gretel are helping.

She put her mic close to Hamster.

Veronica: Do you have any idea where she might be?

Hamster: Good question. Superhero Gretel is looking for her in Danville.

Veronica: Well I sure hope you find her. In other news, Duck Boyz and Love Handel are collaborating.

Bailey kicked the door opened.

Bailey: You find anything yet?

Fred: Sorry, no.

Bailey: Oh come on! You hacked into Belle's account!

Kevin: This is different.

Bailey: Of course it is. YOU drove her away!

Kevin: What?!

Kevin picked Bailey up by the collar of shirt.

Kevin: You little-!

Fred: Guys! We can't fight! Gretel wouldn't want us too...

Kevin let go of Bailey.

Bailey: Sorry, I'm just...upset. It's not your fault.

Kevin: Thanks.

Hamster flew in the room.

Hamster: Couldn't find her yet...

The TV glitched out and revealed the wolf in a warehouse.

Wolf: Hello Eastside. It is I, Melvin Meyer. My brother is the Mayor of your pathetic town. It should have been me. I ran away and thanks to the mishap of some "Milo" dude, I ended up mutated into this. But on the bright side, I have her.

He showed off an unconscious Gretel.

Kevin: GRETEL!

Melvin: She apparently went missing so I decided to use her as a blackmail. Make me mayor of Eastside or she perishes.

The four stood there shocked.

Fred went on her laptop.

Fred: I just found his address.

Bailey: Wow, that's easy.

Fred: Well I don't want my favourite cousin dead. Anyway, he's in the abandoned Totally Tools building on the outskirts of Danville.

When the girls looked at Kevin, he was zooming off in his Minivan.

Fred: Kevin?

Bailey: Oh no! He must've went to that Wolf guy.

Hamster: That's dangerous.

Gretel woke up and saw Melvin.

Melvin: One hour left brother...ah, you're awake.

Gretel: What?

The Minivan rammed through the wall.

Gretel: Kevin!

Kevin hit Melvin before he ran out the minivan. He tried untying Gretel but Melvin attacked. Gretel winced and closed her eyes while she heard Kevin scream.

Kevin: Gretel! It's not your fault!

More blows were heard until silence. She opened her eyes to see Kevin unconscious. Her eyes filled with rage before she changed into her super suit and broke free.

Melvin: Oh crud.

The last thing Melvin saw before blacking out was Gretel punching him.

Fred, Hamster and Bailey finally arrived to find Gretel panting while floating over Melvin. Her rage turned to sadness as she went to Kevin.

Bailey: Gretel!

Gretel: Bailey, Fred, Hamster! I'm fine but Kevin...

Gretel went over to the unconscious boy and cried on his chest.

Hamster: Oh no...

Fred: We got to call an ambulance or he'll die!

Unknown to Gretel, her tears healed Kevin's wounds and he woke up.

Kevin: Don't worry Gretel Beans, I won't let anything bad happen to you.

Gretel: Kevin!

Everyone hugged him.

Bailey: Gretel, I think you have healing tears.

Kevin: Gretel, it's not your fault Hiromi broke up with me and neither is it your fault I don't have powers.

Gretel: But I heard you talk to Fred...

Fred: Oh, he meant Professor Exclamation.

Gretel: Really? Sorry I ran off.

Kevin: I'm just glad you're safe.

So they all returned home and Carolina and Dave were happily reunited. Hamster and Gretel told the news that Kevin helped in searching for Gretel.

[litanyrobin]

I wanna put a smile on your face

Summary:

Bernard Dowd has waited all his life for the moment when he can reach his beloved J.J. and join him in his kingdom of madness. Luckily, he doesn't need to wait anymore.

Or, Bernard's rise as Harley Quinn's successor alongside the current Joker.

I wanna put a smile on your face (Tim Drake x Bernard Dowd) by anyrobin in AO3

Raucous laughter erupted uncontrollably from Bernard's chest, shaking his entire body. The more he laughed, the more hysterical he became for not being able to stop. However, his eyes -wide as saucers and bloodshot- reflected pure satisfaction. Finally, after long hours and hours of waiting connected to various devices that gave him electric shocks and made his lips widen sideways, he had managed to capture on his face a grimace as magnificent as the one his beloved wore on his. The wait was over and a smile was forced upon him, parting his face with misunderstood madness and highlighting the white of his teeth with the reddish, slimy edges he had just outlined on top of the white cream with which he smeared his face. He tried to hum Mary had a little lamb as he drew a black heart over each cheek as a symbol of the love that guided him, but the melody broke into laughter at every turn. Finally, he highlighted his eyes with shades of red and black, matching his clothes, in honor of the old days when he had fallen in love with his beloved pumpkin.

"Babbler," they called in a sing-songy voice from outside the dressing room, like the wolf asking the children if they were ready to come out and play, "are you ready for the show?" 

"Yes, pumpkin, I'm coming! haha!"

Bernard rubbed his lips together and blew a kiss to the mirror before the maniacal grin took the place above his chin again. Then, he played with his fluffy hair and picked up his long two-sided mallet before heading over to where the second Joker was calling him, knowing better than to make him impatient.

He opened the door and Joker Jr, the former Robin he had fallen in love with in his civilian days, was waiting for him with one hand behind his back and another offering to help him down the steps of the RV they had stolen for the occasion. In front of them, several people bound between them stared at them in horror, their faces stained in tears and visible limbs quivering like jelly. 

"You look fantastic, Bernie," Tim murmured as he helped him down. Bernard gloated internally, for his boyfriend only called him that when he was in a good mood.  It would make him happier once he took care of the little mission his partner had brought him. 

"Thanks, pumpkin," he sighed. "Now let's see, who will play with this babbler today?"

ੈ✩‧₊˚

J.J.'s smile, as never before, wavered.

As much as Bernard loved that permanent smile on his face, he had to admit he was a little proud to be the only one who had the ability to make it falter. 

It was all a great coincidence. He, an admirer of the great criminal Harley Quinn's once great passion for the last Joker; follower of all the conspiracy theories of Gotham City's underworld and the heroes who dealt with them; in love with the third Robin and the one who had once been under the mask since, like, forever... He, of all people, had been kidnapped by the current Joker, or Junior... By Tim Drake.

He wasn't surprised he'd fed up with Gotham's heir to crime, after all, he wasn't able to quiet his excitement at finally having an encounter with, he assumed, the crush of his youth. And he assumed because his theory that Tim Drake, former Robin (it had concluded many, many years ago), was the Joker Jr. was due to a bunch of internet rumors and street speculation he'd tied up on his own until he'd convinced himself of it.

"This. Is. Exciting," he squeaked under his breath. It didn't go unnoticed by J.J., however, whose eye twitched for the third time, already beginning to realize that he wouldn't get a ransom for Bernard. He probably considered him unbearable, he didn't blame him. But it was just that he felt like he was in one of his most twisted dreams. "Will you explain to me what your plan is? Are you going to strap me on dangerous chemicals? Joker gas? Oh, you're going to broadcast on television?" He wasn't ready to go on TV, but he would be happy to continue spending time with the love of his life. He wanted to see how much he had changed.

An incredulous laugh went through Junior.

"Wow wow, you're quite a babbler, don't you ever shut up? What are you babbling about?" he laughed harder, regaining his mad composure. "You're quite the babbler. I want to squash you like a bubble."

Bernard swallowed a comment regarding Junior's joke. That certainly wasn't his forte. Instead, he opted for another relationship that lambasted him with force.

"Babbler, like the bird... We'd be two birds, a pair of little turtledoves!" offered Bernard, too focused on his romantic projection to catch Tim's wince at the bird comparison.

"Ha... Haha... Hahaha... Hahahaha... Hahahahaha!" he began to laugh hysterically. Bernard was undeterred. "Oh, we'd better shut you up soon, hadn't we, babbler? Let's make that smile disappear for a while..."

ੈ✩‧₊˚

Joker Junior had a thing for scaring the successors of Batman and company. Bernard could understand the reason and therefore empathize with the cause quickly, knowing what he had to do when fighting the old and new members of his pumpkin's former family.

"Yuujujuu, little bats, over here! Come play with Babbler," Bernard called, shaking his free hand and laughing. He began twirling his mallet and running up to the man in the black suit and blue bird on his chest. He shook the weapon playfully until he hit him excitedly on the back and then acted as if it had been an accident. "Whoops. Hahahahaha."

His mission was to take care of the hostages, keep the sidekicks away while Joker Jr. took care of the big leaguers, the big bat, all in black and red bat on his chest, and his current robin, too much like Tim's style in his Robin days. Tacky, if you asked Bernard. Anyone underneath the mask was a disgusting pretender. No one would ever measure up to his beloved, no matter which of his legacies it was. He was the best robin, the best joker and the best human being that had ever lived. No one would ever be able to catch up to him and Bernard would be by his side every step of the way, even if it led nowhere. If Timothy wanted to amuse himself in an eternal sick chase between him and his old family, Bernard would accompany him. 

Till death do them part and after that.

"Baaabler?" shouted Joker, up on top of some rafters and threatening to cut the ropes of a guy tied up on top of an acid pit. Classic. "Are you here, honey?"

"I'm coming, pumpkin!" he replied, dodging a kick from his opponent and punching him in the face. 

However, as soon as he wanted to dodge another punch, he was pierced by a burst of pain in his bare arm after feeling a loud gun noise. 

Shit, none of them had noticed that a red hooded man had joined in the fun and now Bernard had a bullet stuck in his arm.

"Ha ha, that's what was missing!" he laughed gritting his teeth. He switched the mallet in his hand and stumblingly tried to hit the hooded man while taking hits from the bluebird. "Damn bats, always in cologne. They need to get independent," he gasped.

"Look who's talking, always glued to that crazy man's hip," the hooded one spat, missing a shot as Bernard swung hard to avoid him. "You can't talk..." he took a blow from Babbler's mallet on the knee, "...about independence. Uh. You're gonna pay for that one."

And he did, as another bullet landed in his thigh.

"Bernie!" he heard the Joker yell as he tackled the big bat, leaving a gap for it to hit him.

No names on the field, Bernard wanted to say, but black dots began to cloud his vision.

ੈ✩‧₊˚

"I'm so, so glad you let me help you, Tim," Bernard said. The kidnapping had been a failure and Tim had agreed to give him a chance at his side. Because he remembered, Bernard repeated to himself excitedly. 

Tim stiffened, however, and whipped his cane against the floor before knocking over everything on a table in the corner of the giggle house they were hiding in. 

"No names on...," he mumbled. Then he cleared his throat and grinned like a maniac again. "Who's that? I think you're talking about the dead ones, Babbler. I don't like that. And you don't want something I don't like," he threatened. 

But Bernard actually agreed. He wanted to do nothing more than pleasing his beloved. And it made him shudder that Joker Jr. had a nickname for him so soon, regardless of whatever connotation that one had. 

"Sorry... ehm, Junior."

Junior started laughing uproariously and kicked a chair next to where Bernard was sitting like a dutiful auditor.

"Junior? Ha! Why would it be Junior when there's no one to confuse me with anymore."

For a second, some courage struck Bernard and he decided that maybe making his true intentions clear next to the Joker would help him. Then he said:

"And what about...honey...", he stood up and slowly approached Tim. As the latter did nothing to push him away or move away, nor did he move a muscle, he had the audacity to curl his arms behind the other boy's neck. "O puddin', my honey, my beloved...sweetie, pumpkin." He brought his face close to the other until their noses were about to touch, his breathing erratic and his heart pounding.  Joker Junior began to laugh, very loudly, without pushing him away. Then he grabbed him around the waist and smiled creepily at him, but with his eyes narrowed in something Bernard wanted to believe might amount to affection.

"Well, why not, I guess everyone needs a sidekick... or something."

ੈ✩‧₊˚

Joker Jr. had a large bruise expanding on the side of his right eye and blood trickling down his lower lip. His wrist was beginning to swell where he had probably gotten a sprain after jumping from the rafters to grab Bernard and flee the crime scene until he managed to completely miss the bat colony. 

"I'm...," Bernard coughed and spit out some blood he accumulated at some point during the fight, "I'm fine, pumpkin. You don't have to worry about me. You can finish the job, haha." 

The Joker ran his sore hand in exasperation through his hair, and shook his head, jaded. 

"Shut up. Just, shut up, Bernard. I know the best thing you do is talk... a lot," he laughed, more raucously than he intended and couldn't stop for a few long seconds. "Tch, just, shush. Let me bandage this up. You'll be fine, honey."

He'd actually lost a lot of blood while they'd escaped, it wasn't fine, but he liked to believe in Tim.

"Okay... It's okay. I'm fine. We're fine, pumpkin," he murmured with a chuckle. From where he lay and Junior fiddled with bandages on his arm, Bernard raised his free hand and swatted Tim's bruised cheek. "It's going to be okay, so put a smile on that face. Take that grimace off, haha." 

With his bloody finger, Bernard forced Tim to raise one side of his mouth and elicited a blood-painted scary half-smile. He was so cute.

"Haha."

Tim smiled fully just as Bern's hand fell against his will and his vision went completely dark.

"I'll, ah... See you later, pumpkin. Smile."

ੈ✩‧₊˚

When the electric shock therapy was over, Joker Junior dressed in his best purple suit and made sure his greenish-black hair was as decent as it could be. He fixed his unique clown makeup and with thumbs smudged in red paint stretched a big grin toward his ears, putting more pressure than necessary on his cheeks. 

Bernard, who couldn't stop laughing to the point of tears, but was pleased with it, finished painting hearts on his cheeks and walked to the outstretched hand waiting for him to walk to the bound hostage waiting for them to read their vows.

It was a modest ceremony, just the two of them and the priest on top of abandoned containers near the harbor in Marina. They walked hand in hand to the bound priest and let him read the usual Catholic wedding paragraphs, asking him to add and emphasize the wrongness of gay marriage just to annoy him more. Junior pointed his gun at him, the one that had killed his predecessor, and looked at him with malice as the ceremony went on, only changing his expression when his eyes met Bernard's excited ones. 

Finally, Bernard said after Tim:

"I take you from this day forward until death do us apart."

And Tim replied:

"And after that, honey."

"And after that," Bernard repeated with a chuckle, putting a smile on his Joker's face.

♡