#jkrowlings

[my-castles-crumbling]

Guys remember that time JK Rowling named Kingsley Shacklebolt and really thought she was Doing Something? Like how did we not figure this bitch out sooner?

[coochiequeens]

There's something satisfying about when an abusive man is called out by other men. Or at least one man.

Rest In Infamy, You Haunted Castle

Why I believe the Neil Gaiman accusations

By GRAHAM LINEHAN JUL 19, 2024

I only met Neil Gaiman once, at an upscale dinner party where Derren Brown had been hired to do magic tricks like in the old-timey days. Between astonishments, Gaiman and I withdrew to a quiet corner where I pretended to be pleased that he was giving me a signed copy of ‘Sandman’. One of the unexpected advantages of being cancelled is telling people who took part in my harassment what I really think about their work, but this was a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, so I said the right things and we went back to being bamboozled by Brown’s invisible craft.

To give credit where it’s due, I later read Gaiman’s ‘Coraline’ to my kids which had them simultaneously terrified and hooked, and thanked him for it. Whatever my feelings about his earlier work, he was a real writer, practising his own invisible craft. From the evidence of that book, I thought he was probably a decent person too, an impression that continued until 2022, when we started to get into it over The Issue.

I may have asked why he wasn’t speaking out on behalf of JK Rowling, who was undergoing one of her regular cancellations for refusing to pander to the spoilt brats who loved her books but missed their meaning. A big name like his might have shifted the conversation and given her some much-needed support. He might perhaps have persuaded some of his fans to give the matter another look. This was when I assumed people like him acknowledged biological reality but worried about ‘coming out of the closet’, as it were. It took me years to realise that almost every celebrity mate of mine believed, or was pretending to believe, in the fashionable, American mind-cancer of ’gender’.

But back then, I was still astonished to find that he was a carrier of the virus, the mass delusion that by sheer coincidence, turned up after the arrival of the Internet. Whether it was Bill Bailey or Neil Hannon, Robin Ince or Matt Lucas, Arthur Mathews or Jimmy Mulville, it was always the same story. A sudden cloud of amnesia would form around my celebrity mates, a real peasouper, from which they suddenly could not see why we need female-only spaces, or why unhappy teenage girls will not find a miraculous cure for their woes in a double mastectomy. Far from sharing any of my urgency in the need to stop children from being irreversibly harmed in gender clinics, they instead downplayed, deflected and dismissed. “I never ask you to join in with my animal activism” grumbled Neil Hannon on one of the occasions I begged for his support.

“Couldn’t you pretend women and children are animals?” I thought.

My usual trajectory during these conversations saw me shifting from gobsmacked disbelief to fury and despair. The disloyalty made me angry, but knowing my friends did not care about their own daughters, wives, sisters and mothers was, and continues to be, destabilising in the extreme.

Gaiman went one step further. I can’t find the tweet, so I may be paraphrasing, but he said

"I hope you're kinder if your daughter ever hopes to transition."

I can think of no uglier thing to say to a parent. For girls, ‘transition’ means double mastectomies in their teens, hysterectomies in their mid-twenties, early menopause and a four times greater chance of having a heart attack than males of the same age. To have this decaying goth wish that horror on my daughter was more than I could bear. I wanted to rip his throat out.

Like a pair of grappling cowboys falling off a rooftop, our fight spilled into email. I sent Gaiman this article about the Tavistock. It was clear when he wrote back that he hadn’t absorbed it Like most celebrities in this fight, he appeared to have lost the ability to read.

“As I said before Graham, I hope that you'd be kinder if it was one of your kids who wanted to transition. “

He actually said it again. The piece was right there, detailing exactly what was happening to the children unlucky enough to wander through the Tavistock’s doors, and he chose to repeat that disgusting thing. Why?

That same year, just months before Gaiman was advising me on the value of kindness, a 22-year-old woman (‘Scarlett’ in the podcast) arrived at his Waiheke Island home in New Zealand for a babysitting job. Upon her arrival, she discovered that Gaiman’s wife of the time, Amanda Palmer, had suddenly remembered a sleepover, an appointment the child was apparently eager to attend.

So she and junior drove out of view, leaving the 23 -year-old Scarlett alone with Gaiman for the night. Within a few hours the 61-year-old man, without warning or invitation, appeared fully naked and slipped into the other end of her bath. Scarlett alleges that over the next three weeks, they embarked on a semi-consensual relationship, where Gaiman routinely ignored the boundaries she set. She alleges that he became angry when she would refuse these demands, used a belt to beat her, insisted she call him ‘Master’ and once sexually assaulted her so violently that she lost consciousness.

“… (the sex) was so painful and so violent that I fainted. I passed out, lost consciousness, ringing in the ears, black vision, the pain was celestial, you know, which is a strange word to use, but I couldn't even describe it in language. And when I regained consciousness and I was on the ground, I looked up and he was watching the rehearsals from Scotland of whatever they were filming, I don't fucking know. And he didn't even notice that I was passed out. And you know…there was blood. It was so so, so traumatic, and I asked him to stop. I said it was too much.”

Scarlett is a compelling witness despite, or because of, her contradictions. Certain things paint a picture of consent—she sexted Gaiman, to which he would send careful replies—and she laughs nervously when she talks about the alleged abuse. But when Gaiman’s side of the story is put to her, she turns cold as a knife and shows flashes of fury that she—in her telling—young, inexperienced and dazzled by Palmer and Gaiman’s fame and lifestyle, was used so casually and so brutally.

A few years back, I wrote about becoming a sort of Jessica Fletcher figure on Twitter. ‘Murder, She Wrote” but with paedophiles and predators. “Just as murderers seemed drawn to any location Jessica presented herself, “ I said. “My opining about women's rights and safety on Twitter appeared to attract the kind of men who can't sit still during a spelling bee.”

Among my adversaries was Peter Bright, the Ars Technica writer now doing twelve years for trying to buy two children to abuse. Luckily the children didn’t exist and the parents were actually FBI agents. Our exchange was brief and concerned safeguarding. I’m sure you’re all astonished to discover that he was against it.

Then there was ex-Labour MP Eric Joyce, who argued with me about the safety of mixed-sex loos in schools and was done for possessing the worst kind of child abuse images. More recently, I tangled with ‘Lexi’, who is now serving time for rape.

They all had one thing in common. They couldn’t leave alone those of us who were actively opposing the trans movement's assault on safeguarding, an assault that chimed nicely with their plans for the future. Each was returning to the scene of a crime not yet committed, each picking at a scab on their own character.

In 2018, at the height of #MeToo, Gaiman tweeted “On a day like today it’s worth saying, I believe survivors. Men must not close their eyes and minds to what happens to women in this world. We must fight, alongside them, for them to be believed, at the ballot box, and with art, and by listening, and change this world for the better.”

Well said. I certainly believe the women in ‘Master’. During my Jessica Fletcher period (a period which continues) no-one except Gaiman ever mentioned my kids. I think he knew it would cause me distress, and the second time he said it was just a twisting of the knife. Many of my colleagues in the media joined in with the trashing of my reputation, but Gaiman went that extra mile. I believe this is because he is a sadist. I think he is a man who finds pleasure in the suffering of others, and a man who does not see women and girls as fully human.

This was my final letter to him.

Dear Neil

I notice you’re still pretending you can’t read the Tavistock story. If you ever try and lay that curse on my kids again I will certainly share our exchange. Your privileged beliefs are harming children so to paraphrase Will Smith, keep their names out of your fucking mouth.

Thank you for giving me one last chance to say that JK Rowling will be remembered as a hero and you as a traitor to the kids who loved your books.

Rest in infamy, you haunted castle.

All the best,

Graham.

[fantasticcolorcloudflap]

I will never understand how JKR just created the marauders- a bunch of teenage kids who loved eachother so fiercely and who would do anything for each other, like becoming animagi for Remus- and then wrote the most heartbreaking retching story of betrayal- AND DIDN'T USE IT. SHE JUST MENTIONED IT A LITTLE BIT AND THATS IT. GIRL WHAT THE FUCK. Thank god ao3 exists

[romnianistan]

@joannerowling

[Introduction]

While many articles have been written about Harry Potter and the school board genre or its relationship to fantasy, very few people have looked into the influence of the Gothic in Harry Potter (or in JKR's works in general). Part of it I think is due to the depreciation of Harry Potter by the cultural bourgeoisie, who only regard it as mere children's books that don't hold any actual literary value and that aren't worth to be studied seriously. Yet many tropes, storylines and plot devices used by JKR draw inspiration from the Gothic genre, bringing to it a modern twist by both adverting and subverting Gothic clichés. This inspiration is apparent in JKR's focus on broken families stuck into a cycle of poverty and violence involving incest and alcoholism or in the settings of many of the most iconic scenes of her book (to me the situation of Merope Gaunt, the way she's treated by her male relatives and the description of her house clearly allude to that of Catherine Linton at Wuthering Heights). In another (badly written) post, I tried to argue that one example of such a subversion in JKR's works was her use of the Gypsy theme -- Romani people as the embodiement of marginality, social and sexual danger as well as oriental mysticism --, a trope of Gothic literature most notably used by Emily Brontë in Wuthering Heights and Victor Hugo in the Hunchback of Notre-Dame, and that's been studied by Ken Lee in his article on Gypsylorism. But while JKR never once mentions Romani people in the Harry Potter series (an omission that is very interesting in itself; she's leaving out of her series the ethnic group that's been associated the most with witchcraft in folk tales for centuries, even though she's drawing inspiration from European folklore), she does mention them a bit in The Casual Vacancy and a lot in Cormoran Strike. However, as opposed to Wuthering Heights and HoND, Romani people aren't actually associated with paganism in JKR's books (they would have if she had been racist); their mention serves a Gothic aesthetic purpose as the non-Romani pov character starts thinking about Gypsy witchcraft and wandering, but that romanticising is quickly destroyed once the narrative brings up the actual reality of what it means to be Romani(-adjacent) in the UK: poverty and social exclusion. (In my opinion, this is a subtle commentary on how rich people idealize wanderness and poverty despite their being trauma-inducing experiences for the people who experience them.)

In my opinion, another influence of the Gothic is also the character dynamic she builds around Harry and Voldemort. In three different ways, the Harry/Voldemort dynamic parallels that of Dracula and Mina Harker in Bram Stoker's Dracula: first, the in-narrative construction of that dynamic; second, the way that character dynamic is used as a plot device by both Stoker and JKR in their respective works; third, the significance/symbolism of that character dynamic.

1. The narrative build up

In both Dracula and HP, the psychic bond that unites Mina/Harry and Dracula/Voldemort is created in spite of Dracula and Voldemort. In Dracula, that bond is an inevitable consequence/side effect of the repeated blood sucking Dracula does on Mina. In HP, that bond is created despite the knowledge of Voldemort and as a consequence of Voldemort's murder attempt.

In both stories, that bond was created/reinforced by blood mixing. In Dracula, blood mixing allows Dracula to link his mind directly with Mina's. In HP, that bond becomes much stronger after the graveyard scene, when Voldemort also uses Harry's blood to regain life. In both cases, we have blood magic and DNA mixing involved, resulting in an identity crisis on the part of Harry/Mina (their sense of self is eroded after the distinction between their body and that of Dracula/Voldemort got blurred and as the emotions/thoughts of the other start influencing theirs).

Dracula forms a psychic bond with Mina Harker as a step towards mind control. He wants to read, manipulate and control her mind and her thoughts, and in particular, he wants to use it to spy on his enemies (Jonathan and Van Helsing). However, he is forced to block the link when he realizes that, if he can spy on the heroes through Mina, Mina can spy on him as well by being put into a hypnotic trance that allows her to sense Dracula and his surroundings and can feel how far away or how close he is to them. This is what eventually leads the heroes to Dracula and allows them to catch him.

In Harry Potter as well, Dumbledore fears that psychic link would be used by Voldemort to spy on the Order of the Phoenix through Harry. This is why Dumbledore ignores and isolates Harry for an entire year and this is also what prompted Dumbledore to get Snape to teach Occlumency to Harry -- to block Voldemort's thoughts. But Voldemort doesn't actually use the link to spy. afaik he only uses it twice: once to deceive Harry and get him to come to the Ministry of Magic, and once at the very end of OotP when he briefly takes control of Harry's body. But Harry (just like Mina) realizes he can use that link to his own advantage and spy back on Voldemort (he repeatedly does so in DH): just like Mina, Harry is able to feel what he feels, to hear his thoughts and to sense how far or how close he is.

So we have a similar process following the same steps: evil blood magic on the part of an unwilling villain first, blurring of identity second. In both stories, the psychic link serves as a war strategy playing out over a deep identity crisis. The difference is that this process spans 4 books and 13 years in Harry Potter, with many more smaller steps in between, but overall it's still the same structure.

2. The Harry/Voldemort (Mina/Dracula) dynamic as a plot device

Because everyone uses the psychic link to spy on the other, it becomes a power play for the two characters involved, symbolically representing the struggle between life and death (love and hatred). But it also serves a narrative purpose: both stories are written from the perspective of the heroes. By introducing the psychic link as a plot device, the reader can get some insight into the pov of the villain of the series. The psychic link then becomes a way to drive the action: after each discovery, the character (be it Mina, Harry, Dracula or Voldemort) takes action. They plan a fight/battle, they track each other or they fly from each other. With the psychic link, the writer (Stoker/Rowling) is able to write very cool descriptive scenes from a totally different perspective, taking place in a totally different setting we don't normally see otherwise (think of the description of the Riddle House at the beginning of GoF -- an apparition that is justified in-narrative by its being shown to Harry in a dream). In both Dracula and HP, the psychic link also allows the writer to write dialogues that have more to do with the mystery genre than the fantasy genre (what's the villain doing? are we sure that information is legit? who is he talking to?) Finally, and even if we have to wait a few chapters for it, it leads to the introduction of battle scenes.

So both Dracula and HP use the psychic link as a plot device in a similar way: 1. it drives the action by justifying the writing of descriptive scenes, action scenes and dialogues, 2. it makes the story even more compelling for the reader who gets to hear the exclusive thoughts of the villain in a setting we are not used to (the villain's lair!) so those scenes feel special and cool, 3. it allows the writer to diverisfy the genre of their book by introducing new elements taken from the mystery genre.

3. The symbolic of that relationship

Voldemort, just like Dracula, is an undead being, a living dead. While Voldemort himself isn't a zombie (an "inferi"), a ghost or a vampire, he does surround himself with them and his physical description is very much akin to that of the undead. Two of his most significant features are his paleness (also a recurrent adjective to describe ghosts) and his long, spidery fingers, which together can be used to describe both Voldemort and Nosferatu:

(book!voldemort literally looks like this bad guy over there ^ but without a nose and with red eyes -- and this is why he haunts my sleep sometimes!! that character design fucks)

Symbolically as well, Voldemort is an undead being, a living dead, as it says in his very name ("fleeing death", "flight from/of death"). In his backstory as well, Voldemort became twice a living dead. First, by spiritually killing himself and rendering his soul to the dark arts in pursuit of immortality (in much the same way vampires render their soul to the devil). Second, by falling victim to his own Avada Kedavra spell in Godric's Hollow. (Harry is an example of how one survives the Avada Kedavra; I wouldn't say Voldemort survived it considering all the (physical, if not spiritual) remnants of his past humanity were completely destroyed by it.)

More specifically, Voldemort is a vampire: in his very first apparition in the series, he is seen drinking the lifeblood of a living creature (a unicorn). All throughout the series, Voldemort is the undead that needs to feast on others to survive, by exploiting his followers (in the years following Godric's Hollow, he only survives by drawing on the life force of Quirrell and by living as a parasite with Pettigrew), by living on the terror he inspires to other people, and by turning other living beings (Nagini and Harry) into horcruxes (the same way a vampire would turn the human he drinks the blood of into another vampire). Of course, the number 1 inspo for Voldemort is the boogeyman: everyone in the wizarding world is scared to say his name in case he might literally materialize out of thin air. But he is not described (narratively, physically) as any boogeyman, he is specifically the vampire.

Just as Voldemort is Dracula, Harry is Mina Harker: a human being who represents life. Both Harry and Mina carry a part of Voldemort/Dracula's inside of them, and both of them are scared of eventually becoming like them. Both Harry and Mina survived their confrontations with Voldemort/Dracula thanks to the help of their friends (love and friendship trumping death). Both of them are also common human beings who have been involuntarily turned into something so much more unique by the very assault they survived. The way they responded to it (opposing hatred with love and bravery) turned them into something so much more important than mere human beings: they became symbols inspiring strength to others around them. And all throughout the story, both Mina and Harry retain that common-ness, it is repeatedly stated by both Stoker and JKR, in-narrative, that the only thing that sets them apart from others is Mina/Harry's ability to feel empathy and to draw strength from the love of others.

In the novel, Mina openly feels pity for Dracula - not for the monster that he is but for his soul, explicitly questioning whether it might want to find peace. In the last two books of the HP series, Harry also takes on a similar stance with regards to Voldemort. Dumbledore's last teaching was that Voldemort was someone to be pitied (don't feel pity for the dead but for those who live without love), and even though pity doesn't excuse evil, it gives us the moral ground to be better people and create a better world. This was also Dumbledore's most important teaching, the one Harry only fully understands by the end of Deathly Hallows, when he confronts Voldemort and says the only thing that sets him apart from others and that makes him stronger than Voldemort is the love he feels (only understanding this after spending the entire book trying to figure out why hadn't Dumbledore left a strong weapon, like the elder wand, for him in his will).

So in both their moral complexity wrt to the villain and in the ideals they represent, Harry and Mina are very similar. I would finally add that both of them represent vulnerable groups of people (children and women) who are victims of male/patriarchal violence: Harry (a 14yo boy) is abducted and tortured by Voldemort (an adult male) in Goblet of Fire, while Mina is metaphorically raped by Dracula. It's a bit tangential but I think it's another interesting parallel between these two; in all of her books, JKRowling often associates the harm men do to women to the harm fathers(/male authority figures) do to children and the way Voldemort repeatedly tortured, abducted and tried to kill Harry from age 0 to age 17 could also be one of the ways she builds on that social commentary.

[Conclusion]

=> So narratively, I would say JKR drew inspiration from Dracula when designing the Harry/Voldemort bond. In Dracula and HP, that link is established in pretty much the same way: through blood magic, DNA mixing and resort to the dark arts. It is repeatedly reinforced throughout the story following the encounters of Mina/Harry and Dracula/Voldemort, and it serves as a war strategy between the two of them as everyone involved realizes they can use it to spy on the other, leading to the ultimate demise of the villain. When it comes to character growth, the psychic link also works in the same way: it leads to emotional/mental/psychological distress for Harry/Mina who is scared to become evil too. Structurally as well, JKR used a plot device identical to that developed by Stoker in Dracula to create the Harry/Voldemort dynamic. The psychic link introduces a POV-shift in a book series that's otherwise almost exclusively written from the good guy's pov, drives the action by leading to descriptive/action scenes and dialogues, and makes the story more entertaining for the reader. Thematically, I would also say JKR drew inspiration from Dracula when creating Voldemort and Harry as characters. In the books, Voldemort represents a vampiric living dead boogeyman who rendered his soul in search of immortality (just like Dracula), while Harry represents the hidden force of life and love that lies inside the most common of people (like Mina).

[gryficowa]

You know what sucks? Radical feminism (TREF) has so destroyed the opinion of feminism that every time as a feminist you have to explain that no, you are not anti-men, you are not anti-Arab, you are not anti-intersex, you are not anti-trans, thanks, radical feminists, for fucking up the lives of real feminists

I wish you an encounter with a truck or some shit

[coldblooded-angel]

Saltburn Potter AU (but fuck JK for ruining this for us)

Oliver (muggle born) is the newest student at Hogwarts. A transferee from Erehnoll (school of magic located in northwestern Ireland)

Previously: House of Spaniel (yellow, brown, beige) known for powerful, stealthy, and rebellious wizards

Currently: Slytherin House

A little sad he’s no longer wearing his prev house colors until he meets Felix, a hufflepuff who wears his yellows proudly like the sun.

Felix (pureblood) comes from a long line of hufflepuffs (Sir James) and slytherins (Elspeth).

Hufflepuffs are known underground partiers. They have access to dealers that sneak contraband into the school. Extremely popular and very friendly, everyone wants in on their secret common room parties.

Venetia and Farleigh are slytherins.

Farleigh is half-Veela and never wears his house colors cuz he says they clash w his closet and hangs out in every common room so much that no one really knows which house he is

Felix reaches out to Oliver because he feels bad that he keeps getting bullied (he’s guilty that he can’t stop Farleigh) ((Oliver is very good at looking very pitiful))

They become close enough that Oliver confesses that his family was killed in a werewolf attack (lie) and he was raised in an orphanage until he could go to school (lie)

Truth: Oliver was attacked in his first year by a werewolf and lived. Now he hides away every full moon so no one knows what he is. His family is very much alive but not in communication in with him (he cut them off)

Oliver tries to win over Venetia and Farleigh by impressing them with his own magic (more powerful for their year) and his ability to get them drunk using potions (so they never get caught by the teachers w alcohol)

Felix starts getting demanding over Oliver’s time, starts asking where he goes thatvhe won’t say, starts believing Farleigh when he says Oliver was doing shit behind his back

Felix follows Oliver one night, doubting his excuse of late night studying until he finds himself in a secluded part of the school that no student is allowed to go. And it’s the full moon.

Definitely gonna add this to the GROWING pile of AUs. I’d love to hear your thoughts !! Thank you @lemmejustpulloutmylightsaber for feeding me worms 🪱🪱

My inbox/dms are always open for anyone who wants to share the brainrot with me !!!

[tipsywench]

I'm losing it over this shitty translated caption which totally fucked with the meaning of this inspirational video Imane Khelif did for UNICEF

just give up everybody

tell that dream to fuck right off we dont need any of that bullshit

[take-care-with-your-glasses]

Souls can feel pain. But not all the pain has a soul within it

[violettathepiratequeen]

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[eddie-redmayne-italian-blog]

“FOR THE LAST TIME, YOU PILFERING PEST! PAWS OFF WHAT DOESN’T BELONG TO YOU!”

Perhaps the most beloved creature in the Fantastic Beasts franchise is the Niffler. A lover of all things shiny and valuable, the Niffler escapes Newt’s suitcase to wreak havoc upon New York City’s banks. And jewelry stores. And fancily adorned residents. Exasperated, Newt must repeatedly catch the little thief. As he gets more and more frustrated, he resorts to name calling — albeit the most tame insult he can conjure, which is the adorable and alliterative “pilfering pest.”

https://www.sideshow.com/blog/fantastic-beasts-newt-scamander-best-quotes

[scarfacemarston]

This is the only post I’m personally going to make about Hogwarts Legacy. Guys, we need to be in solidarity with each other. I’m seeing a lot of LGBTQ+ dismissing Jewish voices. It’s been very disappointing to see people I follow brushing off Jewish voices and I’m seeing it in general posts as as well. There is no reason for that. Jewish people have some very serious concerns and have been faced with persecution and violence. It’s nauseating seeing the anti-Semitism in the game. It can’t be ignored. However, we should continue to  acknowledge that transgender people have been facing persecution and violence and laws that are threatening the right to even exist.  There are a lot of people who have multiple parts to their identity including Jewish POC and Jewish transgender people and Jewish transgender POC just like there are transgender POC voices, too.  Similarly, Jewish people should also be supportive of the Transgender community as well.  We need to be supportive of everyone who is being targeted using their voices  This isn’t something that I should have to say. 

[stakeswandsandcoffee]

I’m so damn comfy

[xemptymialife]

I was just reading GoF and one little thing caught my attention... In the second chapter of the book, when Harry writes a letter to Sirius talking about how his scar started hurting out nowhere, he mentions that Dudley throw his PlayStation out of the window.

I thought that the Playstation videogame was from the early 2000's since is when I got the chance to see one for the first time. I did a quick research and apparently it was realeased on December '94 in Japan, but only September '95 in Europe.

So, accordingly with the school calendar, it wouldn't be possible for Dudley to have one of those since Harry started Hogwarts in '91, so this would set Goblet of Fire in 1994, right? And Harry goes to school in September, and all of this happened probably on August or prior.

How Dudley had a brand new videogame that only came out on December that year?

Am I missing something??

I'm not familiar with the school calendar of European schools, on my country is very different, so if someone could enlighte me on this, I'll be very happy!

[wild-raven-and-crow]

Owls delivering letters is "so last century." Meet the future! RavenDash, a company of ravens that delivers food fast... or eats it on the way sometimes...

[mozzzz05]

Honestly what crack does this bitch smoke?

[coldblooded-angel]

More stuff for my Saltburn Potter AU cuz I can’t stop thinking about them

Oliver has remedial classes since he’s a transfer student and ends up in tutor classes with Felix for History of Magic.

Oliver’s strategy to get to Felix is focused more on getting close to Venetia and Farleigh (since they’re in the same house)

Oliver sabotages Felix’s scrolls so Oliver can volunteer to help Felix with his homework.

Felix takes Oliver to his first trip out in Hogsmeade. They go shopping and Felix almost buys out the entirety of Honeydukes when he learns Oliver has never had any non-muggle candy.

Felix bought Oliver’s first broom and teaches him flying. (Oliver ignores the fact that he is fucking terrified of heights since he gets to hug Felix from behind)

Felix likes buying Oliver new clothes, always commenting on his secondhand uniform and scarf.

Farleigh realizes that Oliver can do non-verbal magic because he caught Oliver getting revenge for him against a homophobic student. (Oliver casted a spell on their shoes that made them walk into every wall.) Only the professor figured out who it was and gave Oliver detention.

Farleigh and Oliver develop a love-hate relationship. They one up each other in classes but also like making snarky side comments about everyone else.

Venetia gets closer to Oliver because she thinks its cute he’s so “exotic” and finds his accent funny. She talks his ear off about relevant pop-culture things and gossip while Oliver shoulders the work of their Potions class.

Farleigh catches on that Oliver sneaks around at night (somehow without getting caught by the teachers or prefect).

Felix totes around the fact that he is the only one Oliver shares his personal life with. (He’s starting to get jealous that Oliver is housemates with Venetia and Farleigh.)

Once Felix accepts Oliver into the group, Oliver shadows Felix everywhere. They sit together when they eat, when they’re hanging out in the quad and when they do study dates in the library.

Felix loves going into the muggle world to party and takes Oliver into his first ever club.

They get too drunk to make it back to the Slytherin Dungeon so Oliver spends the night in Felix’s room. (They also get doused in vinegar because they mess up the password for the Hufflepuff common room too many times.)

Okay that’s it for now. I love harry potter AUs so much I am so excited to write one

(A link to the first post: https://www.tumblr.com/coldblooded-angel/740677956980047872/saltburn-potter-au-but-fuck-jk-for-ruining-this?source=share)