#just say we're family - by all accounts you technically are

[the-cat-at-the-theatre-door]

I have a flash of my main 1940sish period human!AU in my mind - Alonzo working with Plato during the afternoon just post Macavity, and it's mechanic work so they're in a garage, and Alonzo tossing a rag at Plato's face because he's distracted *again* thinking about this girl he saw ducking into a Cafe down the street with her pearl necklace and white hat.

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Too big to care

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in BOSTON with Randall "XKCD" Munroe (Apr 11), then PROVIDENCE (Apr 12), and beyond!

Remember the first time you used Google search? It was like magic. After years of progressively worsening search quality from Altavista and Yahoo, Google was literally stunning, a gateway to the very best things on the internet.

Today, Google has a 90% search market-share. They got it the hard way: they cheated. Google spends tens of billions of dollars on payola in order to ensure that they are the default search engine behind every search box you encounter on every device, every service and every website:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/03/not-feeling-lucky/#fundamental-laws-of-economics

Not coincidentally, Google's search is getting progressively, monotonically worse. It is a cesspool of botshit, spam, scams, and nonsense. Important resources that I never bothered to bookmark because I could find them with a quick Google search no longer show up in the first ten screens of results:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task

Even after all that payola, Google is still absurdly profitable. They have so much money, they were able to do a $80 billion stock buyback. Just a few months later, Google fired 12,000 skilled technical workers. Essentially, Google is saying that they don't need to spend money on quality, because we're all locked into using Google search. It's cheaper to buy the default search box everywhere in the world than it is to make a product that is so good that even if we tried another search engine, we'd still prefer Google.

This is enshittification. Google is shifting value away from end users (searchers) and business customers (advertisers, publishers and merchants) to itself:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/05/the-map-is-not-the-territory/#apor-locksmith

And here's the thing: there are search engines out there that are so good that if you just try them, you'll get that same feeling you got the first time you tried Google.

When I was in Tucson last month on my book-tour for my new novel The Bezzle, I crashed with my pals Patrick and Teresa Nielsen Hayden. I've know them since I was a teenager (Patrick is my editor).

We were sitting in his living room on our laptops – just like old times! – and Patrick asked me if I'd tried Kagi, a new search-engine.

Teresa chimed in, extolling the advanced search features, the "lenses" that surfaced specific kinds of resources on the web.

I hadn't even heard of Kagi, but the Nielsen Haydens are among the most effective researchers I know – both in their professional editorial lives and in their many obsessive hobbies. If it was good enough for them…

I tried it. It was magic.

No, seriously. All those things Google couldn't find anymore? Top of the search pile. Queries that generated pages of spam in Google results? Fucking pristine on Kagi – the right answers, over and over again.

That was before I started playing with Kagi's lenses and other bells and whistles, which elevated the search experience from "magic" to sorcerous.

The catch is that Kagi costs money – after 100 queries, they want you to cough up $10/month ($14 for a couple or $20 for a family with up to six accounts, and some kid-specific features):

https://kagi.com/settings?p=billing_plan&plan=family

I immediately bought a family plan. I've been using it for a month. I've basically stopped using Google search altogether.

Kagi just let me get a lot more done, and I assumed that they were some kind of wildly capitalized startup that was running their own crawl and and their own data-centers. But this morning, I read Jason Koebler's 404 Media report on his own experiences using it:

https://www.404media.co/friendship-ended-with-google-now-kagi-is-my-best-friend/

Koebler's piece contained a key detail that I'd somehow missed:

When you search on Kagi, the service makes a series of “anonymized API calls to traditional search indexes like Google, Yandex, Mojeek, and Brave,” as well as a handful of other specialized search engines, Wikimedia Commons, Flickr, etc. Kagi then combines this with its own web index and news index (for news searches) to build the results pages that you see. So, essentially, you are getting some mix of Google search results combined with results from other indexes.

In other words: Kagi is a heavily customized, anonymized front-end to Google.

The implications of this are stunning. It means that Google's enshittified search-results are a choice. Those ad-strewn, sub-Altavista, spam-drowned search pages are a feature, not a bug. Google prefers those results to Kagi, because Google makes more money out of shit than they would out of delivering a good product:

https://www.theverge.com/2024/4/2/24117976/best-printer-2024-home-use-office-use-labels-school-homework

No wonder Google spends a whole-ass Twitter every year to make sure you never try a rival search engine. Bottom line: they ran the numbers and figured out their most profitable course of action is to enshittify their flagship product and bribe their "competitors" like Apple and Samsung so that you never try another search engine and have another one of those magic moments that sent all those Jeeves-askin' Yahooers to Google a quarter-century ago.

One of my favorite TV comedy bits is Lily Tomlin as Ernestine the AT&T operator; Tomlin would do these pitches for the Bell System and end every ad with "We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company":

https://snltranscripts.jt.org/76/76aphonecompany.phtml

Speaking of TV comedy: this week saw FTC chair Lina Khan appear on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. It was amazing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaDTiWaYfcM

The coverage of Khan's appearance has focused on Stewart's revelation that when he was doing a show on Apple TV, the company prohibited him from interviewing her (presumably because of her hostility to tech monopolies):

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/apple-got-caught-censoring-its-own

But for me, the big moment came when Khan described tech monopolists as "too big to care."

What a phrase!

Since the subprime crisis, we're all familiar with businesses being "too big to fail" and "too big to jail." But "too big to care?" Oof, that got me right in the feels.

Because that's what it feels like to use enshittified Google. That's what it feels like to discover that Kagi – the good search engine – is mostly Google with the weights adjusted to serve users, not shareholders.

Google used to care. They cared because they were worried about competitors and regulators. They cared because their workers made them care:

https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/4/4/18295933/google-cancels-ai-ethics-board

Google doesn't care anymore. They don't have to. They're the search company.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi

[idyllcy]

and baby, if you knew

word count: 2.1k

warnings: mentions of the night before (?), morning after, hickies (?)

summary: oh the horrors of getting caught the morning after (pt2 of saying we're just friends)

You stare at yourself in the mirror, blinking incredulously. (Partially out of pure shock, partially because sleeping with your contacts on was NOT a smart decision on your end)

Holy fuck, Tim got mouthy with you.

You tilt your neck to brush your fingers over the hickeys, gawking at the way it trails down your neck and collar to your chest, the purple popping on your skin. Sure, you weren't half as pale as Tim was, but hello? You didn't even bring concealer. You weren't expecting him to take you to the Wayne Manor. 

"Tim." You swallow, grimacing.

Tim raises a brow, shirt pulled halfway over his head.

"How many hickeys did you give me? Do you have a whisk? Do you have ice? Are you secretly a vampire???"

"One question at a time, lovely." he mumbles. "Seven. There's a whisk and ice downstairs. I am not secretly a vampire, although I can see why you'd guess that."

You blink at him. "Do you have a collared shirt?"

"Just settle for one of my shirts for now." He pulls the shirt over his head, tossing you the other one in the bed. 

"Please tell me it's not sheer."

"It's not."

"Thank GOD you're rich." You mumble. "It's a blessing to have non-sheer white shirts."

"Yeah, I get that." He mumbles. "Come on. Alfred called us for breakfast a little ago."

"Which one of your siblings are here?"

"We'll see." Tim hums, shutting the door to his room. (All of them are downstairs, likely. They were probably having a post-valentine debriefing like they usually do. Bruce was not spared from it.)

You duck behind Tim when you notice everyone having breakfast.

"You said we'll see! Are none of them staying with the people they were out with last night?!"

"It happens every year." Tim hums, holding his hand out for you. "Come on. Don't do the walk of shame."

"Seriously. I run a stan account for you and live in my dorm. I'm practically a hermit." You deadpan. "I am NOT cut out to be meeting your family this early in the morning."

"Master Tim, young miss. Are you ready for breakfast? We are having pancakes."

"Just kidding I would kill for pancakes right now." You mumble, following behind Tim as he sits you next to him.

All eyes are on you as you adjust the collar of your shirt, the tag scratching against your skin, the hickeys on your neck visible. You thank Alfred as he places a plate before you, and you start at the chocolate chip pancakes. Holy shit, fuck the eyes on you, this was heaven.

"Alfred, do you have a recipe book?" You blink at him, eyes wide in admiration. 

"Which recipe would you like, young miss?"

"Oh, all of them if possible. I'd love to be able to cook half as well as you can." You hum, taking another bite of your food. "Do you have a digital copy?"

"Unfortunately, all of it is on paper or in here." He smiles, tapping his brain. "But I am more than willing to provide you with any recipes you may like."

"Mm!" You shove the last piece of the pancake into your mouth, swallowing as you get up. "Tim, do you have a laptop? I want to type a couple recipes down and transcribe what's on paper—"

"Pull open the drawer to your left." He hums.

You pull it open, blinking at him.

"There's a false bottom in it. One of my spare laptops is in it. The password is a combination of letters." He hums.

"With significance?"

"Yes."

"Oh, then I know an approximation, then." You hum, working your finger into the side as you prop it open, pulling his laptop out. "Is it our birthdays?"

"Wait, how did she–" Dick's cut off when you manage to open it on your first try.

"Alright. I'm gonna go! I'll be with Alfred if you need anything." You smile.

"She just?" Duke blinks incredulously. "Did she just hack open your laptop on her first try? Is she in compsci like you?"

"English." Tim grabs a couple pancakes, cutting off a piece of butter. "Creative writing, technically."

"Oh, is she making her own major?"

"Yes." Tim hums. "I don't actually know how she guessed that it would be our birthdays since I only changed it a little while ago. It'd be easier to open if it was just our birthdays combined. Maybe she was stalking me."

"Or, maybe all the years of running a Robin Twitter account finally paid off." Jason shrugs. "She's quite a big writer on the internet too, you know?"

"Yeah." Tim hums. "She's quite the character. Have you read her works?"

"I have." Damian speaks up. "Her writing resembles poetry, pulling on the strings of your heart and snapping them at moments you least expect."

"You've read her works?!" Tim raises a brow at Damian. "That's surprising."

"She resembles the poets."

"She'd love to hear that come out of your mouth for sure." Tim mumbles. "Anything else I should know?"

"She covered me for change once while I went to buy cup noodles." Cass mumbles.

"I'm mutuals with her on Twitter?" Steph points.

"Okay, that's not the point. Timmy." Dick deadpans. "Did you sleep with her last night?"

"Sex or just plain sleeping? Because we did both—"

"I DIDN'T GET TO GIVE YOU THE SHOVEL TALK!" Dick cries. "Okay, when a man and a—"

"Dick, I'm well over into the ages of a legal adult." Tim sighs. "Besides, I'm like seventy percent sure that you gave me the shovel talk when you first found out I was dating Ari in high school. Also, I got one from my dad and Bruce, so I think I'm good."

"Oh, right." Dick mumbles. "But still."

Steph pauses. "Does she want a whisk?"

"She was asking for one earlier." Tim hums.

"We'll go help." Cass mumbles, getting out of the seat, dragging Steph.

"Okay, Tim. Is she the one who was making you all red and blushy during Christmas?" Dick slides closer to him, throwing an arm around his shoulder.

"Yes." Tim sighs, batting Dick's hand away. "She was."

"How'd you ask her out?"

"Told her if she had nothing to do on Valentine's, then she could stick with me and I could plan a date." Tim reaches for another pancake.

"And she agreed?" Jason snorts. "Wow. She's way out of your league."

"Yeah, but at least I got B's absolutely insane ability to pull." He mumbles. "Pulled way out of my league, for sure."

"If you fumble her I fear the things that will happen to you, Drake." Damian clicks his tongue.

"Do I... know her?"

"Duke," Damian sighs. "You're smarter than this."

"He's messing with you right now." Jason pours himself another cup of coffee. 

"What's your relationship with her." Tim deadpans.

"She used to peer review my poems." He hums. "It didn't click until Damian showed me her information this morning, though."

"You just let them go through my girlfriend's personal information?!" Tim finally looks at Bruce, who only gives him a shrug.

"No harm in knowing a little more about your girlfriend."

"I swear, if you bring her in on the vigilantism—"

"That's not happening. I can promise that." Bruce glances at his almost empty mug. "Does she know?"

"She called me out for being Red Robin last night in the car." Tim sighs. "Besides, it'd be strange if she didn't notice immediately how similar Red Robin and I's voices are."

"She's been running your account for how long... now?" Bruce motions for Jason to pass him the coffee.

"Since middle school, so like..." Tim pauses. "Give or take seven years."

"That's a long time." Dick mumbles. "My longest-running fanpage is only six-ish years." 

"If you count the Gotham Gazette, then I've been running for the longest." Bruce snorts. "Is she the one?"

"I think she is." Tim smiles. "And if she's not..."

"Then I will personally see the end of your life, Drake." Damian grumbles. "I shall have mother adopt her and have her write poetry for me in exchange for a living space and food. She shall be the equivalent of a court poet except to mother and I."

"I honestly think she wouldn't turn that down." Tim grimaces. 

"Is she that desperate?"

"She's joked about sleeping with a millionaire to make some money." Tim grimaces. "Something something desperate situations call for desperate measures."

"She would love it in mother's mansion, then." Damian hums, sipping on his tea. "I shall have her write a poem for your death. It shall be my last mercy."

Tim grimaces. "What if she breaks up with me?"

"Then you're in the fault, obviously." Jason mumbles, looking at his phone. 

"So it's my fault regardless of what happens?"

"Listen, her tweets are unhinged. You can't say you like crazy girls and then get annoyed when you date one and she acts insane." Jason grumbles.

"He's got a point, Timmers." Dick hums. "I hope it works out for the best, regardless of the ending."

"Twenty bucks they are endgame." Damian mumbles.

"Alfred bet ten that Tim would pop the ring."

"Ugh, come on. You know no one out-bets Alfred." Dick groans. "Did he set up the jar?"

"He did. This morning." Duke hums. "I put my bet in too."

"Come on–"

"You can't say shit when you bet on all of our relationships and pretty much came out unscathed in all of them." Jason glares. "Shut it."

Tim rolls his eyes, surrendering himself to the idea that his relationship would get bet on. 

"Tim, can I marry your sisters?" You come out of the kitchen, eyes sparkling.

"We're dating." He sighs. "Pretty bird—"

"EWWWWWWW" A mixture of faked hurls and gags are heard in unison as Tim rolls his eyes. 

"Ignore them. Why do you want my sisters?"

"The hickeys are all," You pull your shirt down too to show your cleavage, the hickeys no longer visible, "gone! Your sisters are really good at this."

"Yeah..." Tim sighs, reaching to pull your shirt back up. "Steph isn't my sister, by the way."

"Oh, yes, I know." You smile. "After all, if she was, it'd be strange that you've dated her before." 

Tim chokes on the air at your statement.

"Besides, she's my mutual." You hum. "I also got Alfred's recipes, by the way." You hum, smile on your face. "I also got his chocolate chip cookie recipe, though I need to figure out what the secret ingredient is."

"A dash of vanilla extract." Tim lowers his voice. "Don't tell the rest of the family."

"Got it." You give him a thumbs up. 

"Do you cook?" Damian speaks up.

"I do! Mainly ethnic foods, since there isn't much of that here in Gotham." You mumble. "Got any good Chinese places?"

"Oh, there's this place on Seventh Ave and Jester." Bruce speaks up. "I used to get dim sum there. It's only open from eight to twelve, and you need to get in via reservation. Feel free to borrow my name whenever. Just make sure to invite me."

"Uncle Dan's, right?" You beam. "I went there a while back with another friend, but I miss like... the dim sum that's messy and chaotic in the morning."

"Oh, then try the one on Lightbeam." Dick pauses. "Ah, what was the other street?"

"Oh, that one's good." Duke agrees. "Sam Woo's Dim Sum and BBQ."

"I've had that too!" You smile. "They're good, just quite a while from the university."

"If you really want something good," Cass speaks up from behind you, "try Jin."

"Jin?"

"It's smaller, but it's family-run, and it's been doing business in Gotham for three generations already." Cass hums. "They're called Jin, but the Chinese character for gold. They're right by Gotham U too. On the corner by Circle K."

"The sketchy looking alley??" You blink.

"Yes, but their dumplings are to die for." She pauses. "And they sell in bulk if you want to boil any in your dorm."

"Tim, I want your sister."

"Pretty bird, we just started going out." He clicks his tongue. 

"Tim, if you break her heart, I will date her." Cass blinks.

"You can visit her when she stays in mother's mansion."

"Hm?" You turn to blink at Damian.

"Ignore him—"

"Should you and Drake break up, I have already arranged your living arrangements, should you agree to it."

"And what might they be?" You hand the laptop to Tim, pointing at the document you shared with yourself.

"With my mother. Your only job shall be to write poems and short stories to entertain her."

"Living and writing for the Talia Al Ghul? Count me in." You sigh dreamily. 

"Alright." Tim shuts the laptop after changing the password. "We're going to get going before her roommate calls the cops on her."

"Oh, right!" You mumble. "It was a pleasure meeting you all! I hope to see you again sometime?"

"Tim, send her number in the chat later!" Dick calls as Tim pulls you out.

"Sorry, they're quite embarrassing." Tim mumbles.

"They're warm." You smile. "I like it."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." 

Tim sighs in relief at the look of fondness on your face. Right.

You'll be fine.

[evidenceof]

Winnix Country, I'll take you there.

Winnix fic recs finally! I clawed through pages 1-61 on AO3 and then scoured through Dreamwidth because I just need this ship injected into my brain.

Just so we're all aligned, I'm very much into "Classic" Winnix. And while generally I do still read AUs, much of what I keep close are the ones that are entrenched in, before, and after the war. Still enjoy a bit of the supernatural though. So please forgive the lack of non-WWII AUs. :') Ok onward.

Note: All links in blue are restricted to logged-in AO3 users! So hopefully you have an account so you can read some gold.

5+1 tag

The Way I Wear Your Hat by Muccamukk - I will consume anything Mucca writes and live in it for at least two weeks.

Let Me Be Close by armyofbees - So tooth achingly sweet, tender in post-war. Nix combing Dick's hair? I'm so.

I'm Alright Now You're Here by @stopstopstopit - A.k.a. Dick and Nix going, "Was I truly that blind???" about each other and everyone in Easy Company saying, "Yeah." So good, so, so fun. Giggled like a maniac all throughout.

Pre-War

Before the World Begins by rilla (@flomps)- The first time I read this, I cried. Then again the second, third, fourth, etc. Lew and Dick meet in NY before Benning, before everything, and it's under very different circumstances. I love the characterization of Nix and Dick in this so much and the gentleness in the midst of all the smut. A TALENT!

Lancaster County by rachelelpillo - Technically not pre-war because this is an AU where it happens without them. It's bittersweet, but emphasis on the sweet. Teenage Dick and Nix and a whole summertime of falling in love.

Bicostal by dancinguniverse - I am a sucker for anything that starts at OCS. I love this and the telegrams and letters tucked within it.

Wartime

Bird Wedding by rachelelpillo - The way she writes anything really sounds like a summer day to me. This one is very understated and just wonderful if you want something that leaves you smiling. (Highly recommend you go through her work, last she posted was in 2010. :') )

And at Your Touch, I Burn by Muccamukk- CHRIST. A SICK!FIC. God I love this for so many reasons, one of them being just the incredible way Mucca describes the field exercise, the crawl and length of it. And Dick getting sick. Nix doing what he does. It's wonderful. It's perfect.

Vampire Overhead! by joissant - There's a little Vampire!Nix AU for you. In the midst of Bastogne and hunger, there is this and it's fucking fantastic.

love divine, all loves excelling by @flanneryoconnorfanfiction - The way my heart soared all throughout this fic. Religion, for many reasons is often the point of friction for Dick, and this one turns it over its head. It's reverent and (so) joyful and honestly, probably what God should feel like. There are not enough kudos-es in the world.

Post-War

Head Trip by @ezlebe - Two lines from this fic ring in my head daily, that's how much I loved every bit of it. And I mean who isn't a sucker for Operation Varsity-adjacent fics? Harry's in this so it's automatically just extra wonderful for me. I LOVE!! I absolutely love.

Like a Bird on the Wire by semperama - Them coming home without an established relationship is always a trope enjoy. Blanche Nixon is here being cheeky, and Dick is all smiley, Lewis is stressed the fuck out. It all makes for a wonderful get-together.

More than a Team by @mercurygray - I love reading about Ann Winters and I love seeing Nix and Dick navigate those familial relationships after the war. This is short and so, so sweet. Every bit as wonderful as the ice cream.

thyme and rosemary by @oatflatwhite - Yet another one where Ann Winters makes a wonderful cameo. Dick is trying not to be miserable and he keeps writing all these unsent letters to Lew. Featuring the cutest kitten ever.

Series

What Things We Have Heard Together by joissant (4 works) - Quite possibly required reading for Winnix enthusiasts. Feels like such a gift to be able to thread through so many points in their relationship and everyone else tangled in their orbit.

Winnix from the POV of other people Oh my god I love outsiders-looking in fics of the two of them.

Transcript by Corvid Cordelia - LISTEN. If you love Easy Company, you love Winnix, Webgott, Spierton, etc, they're all here. It's such a treat for people who fell in love with everyone's personalities in BoB.

Women in Conversation by shiveringpinkala - Ann Winters tries to surprise her brother and it doesn't go quite as planned. Blanche is in this too so it makes it extra delightful. Love this fic.

Entendre by @thrillingdetectivetales - Harry Welsh has no fucking clue what Buck Compton is implying about Winters and Nixon but he's gonna find out. Again, I love Harry Welsh with all of me.

A special mention to String Quartet No. 14 by @oatflatwhite for a HS AU that had me kicking my feet and smiling all the way to the very last word.

If you have similar favorites, PLEASE LET'S TALK ABOUT THEM. There's still a lot I'd like to re-read and revisit so this will highly likely be updated in the future. I'd love to hear your favorites too. <3

[internetskiff]

Breen's unfortunately pretty underrated amongst the Valve antagonists, which I suppose is understandable compared to the likes of GLaDOS or The Administrator, but just like those two I feel like there's plenty of things to talk about when it comes to him. He seems like a very conflicted character, especially if you take into account the BreenGrub account and Laidlaw's Epistle 3. First of all is, of course, the leadup to the Black Mesa incident, with the G-Man seemingly making an offer to Breen which seemingly involved overloading the Anti-Mass Spectrometer while processing an extremely pure sample of Xen Crystal - and yes, while it's pretty obvious that the order to overload the systems was very intentional and motivated by whatever deal they struck, I believe that when it comes to the aftermath he may have been sold on a lie. Considering his actions as Administrator of Earth being entirely in the interests of keeping Humanity from feeling the full force of the Combine, I don't think "Becoming the de facto leader of all of Earth" was on his agenda. Perhaps G-Man promised that whatever their deal would entail would bring about a prosperous future for humanity, perhaps all he promised was the possibility of establishing contact with another sentient species (which is something he technically did provide), or perhaps it was something else - there's simply way too much room for speculation there, I think.

A little detail from a HL:A newspaper implies that his position as Earth's administrator wasn't exactly handed to him on a silver platter, instead he had to go out of his way to reach out to the governments with information on how to communicate with the invaders, at which point, already beaten down by Combine forces, they simply gave him the all-clear to speak for all of mankind. This still begs the question of who, or what, gave him the knowledge of how to speak with them - however, it's safe to say if they didn't, Earth would've been left a smoldering pile of rocks and withered carcasses. Once again, he acts with Humanity's best interests in mind, having to choose between the lesser of two evils - it's either enslavement or extinction. He simply chose the option in which Humanity would survive, even if just for a little while longer.

And ever since, we're watching the aftermath. He's trying to talk the last generation of Humanity down, so they may either pass of old age or be absorbed into the Combine - at least if that happens, something gets preserved. Once again, the alternative? They'll just wipe the slate once they get the local teleportation technology they desire. Breen sees no other way than to go along with their demands. He's eventually proven wrong, of course, but he refuses to see the Rebellion as anything but a suicidal march towards the extinction of the human race, and he sticks to that belief up until he is killed by Gordon at the tip of the Citadel. Of course, this doesn't make him a good person. Not at all. This belief has lead him to seek out and destroy anyone who tries to resist. He shows no sympathy to them. He paints them as fools. He himself believes it so. This intense hatred for anyone who resists is seen perfectly in how he treats the Vance family. He views them as fools. As narrow-minded rabble in the streets, senselessly struggling against a tide beyond their comprehension. He's willing to send off a father and his daughter into a world far beyond simply to use them as a bargaining chip. Listening to the two comfort eachother as they're almost raised up to a fate surely worse than death, the only expression on his face is that of pure contempt and annoyance. He's a very fascinating character that I wish Valve would explore again if they ever do another Half Life set during a time period in which he was still alive. He's a coward that easily bends to the oppressor, yet in the end he only does it to make sure something survives. He's cruel to those who resist because he's completely convinced they're going to get everyone killed. He is the Combine's perfect puppet.

haha anyhoo so why was he straight up serving on the magazine covers in HL:A like what was up with all that

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

02/06/2024 Daily OFMD Recap

TLDR; New Events calendar; A Safe Space Ship Event; Watch Parties; Reminders; Cast & Crew Sightings; Clowning; OLD SPICE!; Stats!; Market Research?; Articles; Personal Update; Love Notes; Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika

== New Events Calendar from SaveOFMDCrew! ==

More events happening throughout the week! Tumblr Post

Tomorrow is Cosplay Day! Show off your cosplay and OFMD-Inspired outfits with the hashtags: #WearFineThingsWell!

= New Upcoming Event: A Safe Space Ship! =

Sunday, February 11th - Star of India in San Diego, CA! Museum Hrs: 10 am - 5 PM 1/2 Price Tickets!

== Watch Parties ==

Today's WWDITS watch party went great!

Lots of people had fun pointing out our lovely characters from the show (Mads, Taika, Rhys)

It actually went so well the SaveOFMDCrew twitter got banned! It's back though! If you can, please be sure to follow their backup account in case it happens again.

== Reminders! ==

Muppet Treasure Island - Feb 7th 2024 4PM EST, 1PM PST, 9 PM GMT

Watch Party Hashtags:

#MuppetPirates

#AdoptOurCrew

#SaveOFMD

== Cast & Crew Sightings ==

This was technically the 5th, but I don't think the excitement happened mostly today so I'm gonna throw it in! So Chaos Dad popped his head out yesterday just long enough to like Samba's BTS post on twitter and then also Samba and Rhys' little exchange.

And of course that triggered clowning since anytime Chaos Dad pops in we don our clown shoes. Thank you to @merryfinches for catching some of the discourse!

== Old Spice! ==

Well well well, we're back to polite menacing brands until they respond to us!

Looks like another Astroglide is starting up, the Crew is out there matching deodorants to characters. Thanks to @brainfugk for calling it out!

== Stats! Stats! Stats! ==

So close fam! Let's keep pushing that UK viewership if you have the time/spoons!

= Market Research Campaign about OFMD Potentially Going On? =

There's some speculation around the market research company YouGov potentially conducting research on OFMD. There's a big thread. Why is this important? Well this company works with streamers to measure viewership data, and if OFMD is in there...and someone's interested, that could be a good sign.

Some folks signed up, and if you're interested in doing so too, you can here.

== Articles ==

Some fun articles tonight, including Hard Drive again!

Joke Article: HBO Max Unveils Ominous New “Don’t Get Too Attached” Category

Our Flag Means Death and 9 Other Best TV Shows and Movies About Pirates

Our Flags Means Death fans get TV licence just to watch pirate show

== Personal Update ==

Some of you have heard, I got the COVID so I may be in and out over the next several days, I'm still trying to make sure I get to recaps though so don't worry! I'll let you know if I can't. Remember to mask up if you can and stay hydrated out there luvs!

== Love Notes ==

Alright lovelies. We've run out of Rhys videos for a few days so you're back to me being irritatingly loving at you! I saw this today on The Latest Kate's instagram and it reminded me of a few things I wanted to say. My brain is a bit covid-fogged so apologies if it's a bit wibbly wobbly.

We all struggle with so many little and big things in our lives. Whether it's mental health, self esteem, a physical ailment, love, lonliness, self-identity, family, friends, world conflicts, or anything, I could go on and on.

I know sometimes it feels like you are pushing so hard and you start making so much progress-- and then something, big or little stalls everything and you feel like you're having to start from scratch again.

I just want to send you a gentle reminder that progress isn't always linear. Just because you have lost momentum doesn't mean you've lost your progress. Every single situation is a learning opportunity and every time you run into a new hurdle, you learn from the last one.

You are wonderfully intelligent, kind, precious, complex people and no matter what you're dealing with, no matter how small or how big, you are moving forward and making headway bits at a time. Remember to be kind to yourself and don't beat yourself up for bad days.

We are so proud of you lovelies, remember that.

== Daily Darby / Tonight's Taika ==

Tonight's gifs are courtesy of the glorious, brilliant, talented, ever-enabling @celluloidbroomcloset from her post over here.

Ok, Good Afternoon, Good Evening and Goodnight all! <3

[melonteee]

Oda is really good at foreshadowing because, while him having always had a clear complete backstory for each character from the get go isn't so sure, he clearly has character sheets for each of them that highlight the themes to be explored through them and what logically leads them to become who they are today (finding family in strangers for robin : why not bio fam? -> neglect. why realization at enies lobby and not jaya? -> betrayal in the past, needed proof of truthfulness. why this found fam and not another one? -> criminal lifestyle and previous experience of constant exploitation)

Then when he sets up a scene between characters, he takes all of those sheets into account and specifically choses what would make sense to be "revealed"/said between those characters (and in turn to the audience) at this specific point in time in the plot and in the overall story

Ex: Robin and Law's talk about the Will of D. It makes complete sense for both of them to have this talk in the story between each other specifically. Why didn't Robin ask any other D before Law ? The D clan aren't that plentiful when you think about it to the point Robin met 3 of them in her entire life. She didn't know how important it was back then so she never asked Saul. She probably asked Luffy but Luff-man doesn't care about those matters to the point he only found out he even had a dad at 17yo ("sorry Robin"). In short, Law is perfect for the job. And while his information fits at that point in the plot for Robin to uncover, we as an audience aren't ready for it yet.

Alternatively, when those character themes sometimes coincide between different characters, he simply ties them together to avoid redundancy

Bonney is a funny case to me because she was created in a week like most of the non-Strawhat supernovas but Oda made sure that her and these new characters wouldn't interfere or create plotholes with what he's already had in mind while leaving enough leeway to tie them more into the plot if needed. Bonney has the biggest leeway of any supernova because of her devil fruit powers. The fact it changes her age and we were only ever given an estimation means you could technically have her be born at nearly any point in time as well as be the daughter, mother or grandmother to anyone you wish.

Yet she fits so well as Kuma's daughter for a very simple reason: It makes the scene of Kuma sending Perona to Mihawk's island gain a layer of sense that was kinda missing and easily glossed over on a first read. Other than giving a demonstration of what Kuma's abilities could do pre-Sabaody and emphasize how much bigger of a threat he was compared to Moria even if they shared the same title, we never really got WHY Perona was spared like the strawhats were at Sabaody. There wasn't some grand vision to it, no tie to something he was part of like the Revolutionaries, ... So why ? Especially at that point in time where he was slowly but surely losing himself and any tie left to his humanity

But then Bonney comes in and their backstory is revealed. And that's when you begin to notice. You notice that Perona is a pink haired adult woman with a rather childish personality. Notice that her devil fruit can easily be underestimated and holds a lot of potential. Notice that Kuma mechanically asked her a really strange question which lacked an important key setup for it. Notice that the spot on Mihawk's island where he sent her to was safe from danger. And you realize

Perona might have reminded Kuma of someone very very close to him to the point his mind couldn't even fathom harming a look alike.

And chronologically at the time of this encounter, he's only seen Bonney as an adult once back at the Sorbet Kingdom where he ended up fainting at the sight alone

In a strange turn of events, things just fit and we're all happy for it

I have nothing to say you're just spot on about everything here. I am so desperate to see Oda's notes on when he makes arcs and characters for how he puts everything together. I can only hope he's kept all of them so, when One Piece ends, he can release a book with all his concept sketches and character/story plots to see exactly how he does it. I need to see how the gears turn u know

[lavellenchanted]

💛 & OTP: I want the whole damn thing

💛 Reunion Kiss/Relief

Jackson's an interminably long board meeting when it happens, trying to make sense of the world's most boring financial presentation, so he doesn't immediately notice the news bulletin popping up on his phone. It's only when they start hearing voices in the corridor and someone runs past the board room window that they all start to realise something's going on, and Jackson suddenly catches sight of the blinking red notification on his phone screen.

"Multi-car pile up," he explains shortly to the board, already on his feet and heading for the door, scrolling down for more information. "I'm guessing we're the nearest hospital - it's gonna be all hands on deck, so if you're qualified to hold a scalpel, get down to the pit."

(Frank, still holding the clicker for his presentation, looks thoroughly relieved that his only qualification is in accountancy.)

Halfway down the corridor, Jackson stops dead. A cold shiver run down his spine and it feels like his stomach has dropped out of him entirely as he sees the location of the accident. That's April's route to work.

Immediately he brings up her number and dials - but it goes straight to voicemail, and he wants to be sick. He shoots her off a quick text and then tries ringing again and again as he heads down to the E.R.

Each time it goes to voicemail.

He tries to tell himself not to panic. The phone lines are probably horrendously busy with people trying to contact emergency services or friends and family to make sure they're alright, and April not answering might just mean she's not looking at her phone. She's probably trying to help, if she is near there.

He tells himself that, but all he can think of is Ben calling him, telling him he was going to have to perform a C-section on April in her kitchen, of April quarantined behind glass, of watching April on the operating table of Grey-Sloan.

(How much luck can one person have?)

"Pick up, damn it!" he shouts as her voicemail message plays again, and a nurse passing jumps in fright.

"Dr Avery? Is everything okay?"

"I'm sorry, I'm just - I'm worried about my wife."

The word slips out automatically, and it's only after he says it that he remembers that, technically, April isn't his wife any more. Because he was stupid enough to divorce her. They're not even dating, despite the fact that they've been living together since they came to Boston, are raising Harriet together.

And yet he never really stopped thinking of her in that way, did he? Even when they were separated, when he was dating other women, when she was marrying someone else, he still thought of her as his.

"Has a woman called April Kepner been brought in? Late thirties, red hair?"

The nurse shakes her head. "I don't think so - not that I've seen. I'll check for you."

She scurries away, but before Jackson can follow or try to ring April again he's stopped and asked for a consult, and then another, and another, and then he gets pulled into a surgery and loses all track of time.

The whole way through he's repeating silently, Please, God. Please let her be okay. Please let me get another chance. I promise I won't waste this one.

His faith still isn't as strong as April's, he doubts it ever will be. Half the time he's not even really sure what it is he believes in. But it's comforting to pray, whether anyone's listening or not.

When he's finally finished and comes back out into the corridor, he immediately pulls his phone out. It's been nearly five hours, and there's still nothing from April. He wants to scream.

And then -

"There's no signs of internal bleeding, but get a CT scan just to be sure."

He spins round, his heart in his throat. April's just coming out of a patient room with an intern; she's in jeans an a tshirt instead of scrubs, dirt and what looks like splashes of blood staining them, her hair scraped back and a band-aid on her forehead, but she's alive and whole and the most beautiful thing Jackson's ever seen.

"April?"

"Jackson, there you are!" Her face lights up as she turns and sees him. Relief crashing over him, he starts running towards her. "I tried to find you but they said you were in surgery. I came with one of the -"

He cuts her off by pulling her into his arms and soundly kissing her. How she got here doesn't really seem to matter any more, just that she is here and uninjured.

She lets out a little sound of shock, and then melts into him the way she always has, her hands coming up to clutch at his scrubs. The feel of her lips is achingly familiar against his, and he rains kisses down on them, one after another, trying to make up for every time he should have kissed her but didn't. And his heart sings as she lifts herself up on tip-toes and kisses him back, meeting each stroke of his mouth with one of her own.

Finally he pulls back, but only enough to rest his forehead against hers.

"You weren't answering your phone," he says quietly.

"I was doing triage at the scene, and then the battery died. I'm sorry."

"You're alright?"

"Totally fine. I promise."

For the first time since he saw the notification on his phone, he starts to relax.

"Dr Avery?" Glancing up, he sees the nurse he was talking to earlier at the end of the corridor. "You found your wife, then?"

Jackson looks down at April, who's smiling knowingly up at him, a warmth in her eyes that gives him the confidence to reply, "Yeah. Yeah, I did."

kiss prompts

[noperopesaredope]

Disclaimer: I barely know what I'm talking about. I'm just putting some thoughts out there because I'm honestly confused about some things. These are the words of someone who can barely understand what anyone is saying and also trusts no one on the internet. I've accepted that I am too stupid to understand this conflict and no matter how much research I try to do, I will never understand any of it. Believe me, I have tried. These are the ramblings of a confused idiot who is out of the loop on everything and will never really be in the loop.

You can add your own thoughts or disagree. But don't yell at me for my thoughts. I've tried to educate myself, but that has failed. But I still want to throw some thoughts into the discussion using my limited understand of everything. I will likely be turning off notifications to this post if too many people shout at me for not understand shit or agreeing with them, so probably don't try to change my mind. Just say what you want to say and add your own essays in the reblogs.

~~~~~~~~~

I've been trying not to say too much about the Israel-Palestine conflict (not just Gaza, but in general) since it's so complicated and messy and I'm not informed enough on another country's massive, decades-long conflict for me to feel comfortable commenting on it. However, I have had a little nugget in my brain that has been bothering me for a while now. A common Zionist argument I occasionally see is that Palestinians aren't actually "indigenous" to the region of Israel-Palestine, and that they are invaders. They came from somewhere else to live in that area, and therefore aren't "the true people of Israel." But I find this argument rather silly and a bit hard to believe.

First off, and I'm not even saying this as an argument against Israel, but isn't the whole point of Jewish mythology (mythology is the technical term) that Israel is "the Promised Land?" As in, the end point? The final destination rather than the start? Maybe I'm confused and need to brush up on Jewish mythology, but from what I remember, the Hebrews came from a different region in the Middle East, then migrated to the region where Israel is. Therefore, they didn't exactly "originate" from there either.

It's also kind of hard to believe that there weren't already other people who were living there already. And then Abraham and his family moved to Egypt anyways due to drought, and the Hebrews were there for hundreds of years before coming back to Israel. And by the time they'd come back, a bunch of other ethnic groups had already made their homes in Israel, as people had been doing likely long before Abraham and his family first came to the region.

And even if Abraham and his family originally came from that region, Abraham already lived in civilization. Civilization still existed there, and people were still living there. Abraham was basically part of a different ethnic group before he created the Hebrews. Therefore, the Hebrews would be from Israel, but so would all of the other people already living there who weren't descendants of Abraham.

Whether or not you believe that the region belonged to the Hebrews by the will of God, all those other mfs were still living there first. You can say that you own the land because God said so, but you can't truthfully say that all the people who were there before Abraham was even born are not native to the region.

Even if we're not looking at Biblical accounts, realistically discussing archaeology and patterns throughout history leads us to the conclusion that there was no singular native ethnic group in Israel.

It is well known that Israel has had, like, hundreds of different peoples who have lived there at different points throughout history. It has switched around a lot of times, and has definitely had multiple ethnic groups living there at the same time. It is a region that has historically been diverse, and many have called it home.

On top of that, who is to say that Palestinians aren't actually also natives to that region? I've heard some people say that the Palestinians are decended from Arabs who invaded the region, but is it really true that all of them are of Arab decent? Again, this area is incredibly diverse, and I'm pretty sure it was ethnically diverse even before Israel was founded. It's unlikely that

Also, haven't the Palestinians been living there for thousands of years anyways? Because in that case, I'd say it's questionable to declare a pretty diverse group of Middle Eastern brown folks to not be native to a region they have been living in for hundreds/thousands of years.

Especially when a large number of those who moved to Israel when it was founded (refounded?) back in 1948 were of white European decent. I believe that Israel is still the homeland of the Jewish people, but is a white Jewish person whose family has been living in Europe for hundreds of years really more native to the Middle East than a brown person whose family has been living in Palestine for hundreds of years?

Like, I see these white ass mfs sitting here saying "I belong here more than you" to these brown people who have been there for generations. This statement is not about Jewish folks who have been living in the Middle East for generations, mainly just those of European decent who declare that the land belongs to them more than those who have been there forever.

I still believe that the Hebrews should be considered "indigenous" to Israel, but to say that they are more indigenous seems disingenuous when both groups migrated to the region. No one group has ever been the true native group of that area, and I feel that either side arguing that the other is not native to the region is full of shit.

We don't know who is native to the region. We barely even know if Israelis and Palestinians each are made of singular ethnic groups. So I feel like declaring the "One True Indigenous Group" is pointless and redundant to the discussion. Either both are or neither are. Shut the fuck up.

[so-long-soldier-writes]

I have no irl friends or mutuals who are Kai Stans so I figured I’d send you an ask about it because you’re my fave Kai account. I just rewatched that episode after the merge where Kai tried to kill Liv with that candle and couldn’t bring himself to do it and I have never felt so emotionally conflicted in my life. Like on one hand, bad Kai don’t murder people. But on the other hand, he looked so genuinely upset to be wrestling with his conflicting emotions and I just wanted to hug him

Okay, first of all, I'm honored to be your fave. I feel like I say this a lot, but I'm absolutely melting!🩷Hearing that people enjoy the things I write always makes me smile, and I think about those kinds of comments on the daily. Second, I rarely answer asks this quickly; I usually write out a response over a few days and edit it over a few more, but this got me so freaking excited because I JUST watched that episode and had the same feelies you're describing. Third, I will gladly be a mutual with you, whether you want to stay on anon or not! (I am so shy and weird irl, but I love talking to people on here, especially fellow Kai stans!!) (I don't talk to anyone irl about Kai, not even my mom who's watching tvd, bc I just KNOW she's gonna be like... you like this guy? 🤨 and i'll be awkwardly trying to defend him like he's not the love of my life. also, i love my mom and we're super close, but every time she watches an episode, she needs to remind me how much she loves matt donovan 😵‍💫)

But back to the point, yes, I literally watched that same episode / scene last night! And ugh, it gives me so many different feelings, too.

We really got to see the internal struggle he was having in that moment. Earlier, he had mentioned he was writing to Jo, and that he was crying, but in this scene, we actually got to see the emotions he may have been feeling while writing it. He was already exhausted and overwhelmed from trying to astral project into 1994 to help Bonnie, which is another huge display of emotion, and now he's facing his innate need to protect himself verses a whole new slew of feelings he doesn't understand.

On top of that, I don't think he actually wanted any of his siblings dead. I think he was just so void of emotion from all his trauma and abuse that he came to believe the only way to survive was if they were to die. He is, and always will be a sociopath; there's no way to unwire his brain, but Luke's emotions gave him all these feelings he hasn't felt in decades. Part of not wanting to kill Liv was definitely Luke preventing him, but I think part of it, too, was his own feelings.

Just thinking about it… sociopathy develops around the ages of 14-16; Kai is technically 40 years old. He was completely isolated for so long, and then thrust into this loud, complicated, modern world that he doesn't understand. He still has to fight to survive; his family still hates him 18 years later. When he finally accomplishes his "task" - to survive, his family hates him even more, and, since survival equals the merge, he now has feelings to battle on top of all these other new struggles.

Then in that scene, he's trying to make up for the hurt he put his sister (Jo) through, and then Bonnie. He offers empathy to Jeremy, helping him reach Bonnie even after Liv stabs him. He's a bit puzzled on what he should feel for Liv. At the moment, she's just in his way of accomplishing these other "tasks," but Luke won't let him hurt her, and he's fighting with himself about it. And that's a lot. Luke is overwhelming him; his own emotions are overwhelming him.

He needs a hug. And a nap. Both. Personally, I wanted to jump through the screen and give him a hug, then let him fall asleep while I held him and promised to keep him safe.

He's just begging for some kind of security throughout the season. He looks to Bonnie and Damon for it, hoping the three of them can escape the prison world together; hoping he can trust them; that they won't leave him there any longer. He looks for it by merging, knowing if he wins, he secures his spot in the coven; he can't be killed. He tries to make amends with Damon, helping him find his mom, and Bonnie, trying to apologize. Even Jo; he feels sick and he goes to his sister, who's a doctor, because she knows her trade; she can help him; provide him with some clue of what's going on, because he doesn't understand. He doesn't want to be left behind on his own again. He wants someone to trust him, and trust that he's trying to be better. But that's exactly what happens when he's trapped in 1903, and then, of course, he snaps again, because he realizes no one is going to change their minds about him, and no one is going to offer the basic human needs he so desperately has wanted for decades.

If someone just gave him a freaking hug and a second chance, things would've went a lot differently for everyone involved.

It's their own fault, honestly, that the season ended the way it did, (speaking, of course, as if the writers were not writing, and that the characters chose the course of the story). Kai, I believe, is extremely intelligent, and knew exactly how to hurt every single person who directly or indirectly hurt him. He found a little bit of security in Lily Salvatore - all he really wanted - and with that little boost of confidence from the wrong person, was able to deliver absolute chaos and destruction where he deemed necessary.

But now, on a completely unrelated note, I also have three random things to say about this scene. Given the chance to talk about it, I feel I must. One, I find it absolutely hilarious how Kai and Liv throw silverware at each other almost every time they fight. The camera pans to a fork or a knife, and suddenly, it's in the other's neck. Makes me wonder how family dinners went in that household. 😅 Two, when he was pouring alcohol on her, all I could think was damn, he's just gonna set that whole mansion on fire and everyone in it. That huge, expensive, historic, mansion, just to burn one girl. Three, I also couldn't stop looking at that sadistic smile. How happy he seemed to get over the "prospect of getting to watch someone burn to death," right before he couldn't bring himself to do it. His dark eyes do something to me. And the fact that he was already covered in his own sweat and tears from, again, over-exhaustion, just had me watching with absolute heart eyes. Maybe I should go to therapy.

But yes, I feel the conflicting emotions. I really wanted him to not kill her, because I didn't want him to prove them all right. I really wanted him to be redeemed because he deserved it so much. But at the same time….. he just looked so hot doing it.

[ofliterarynature]

2023 Reading Wrap Up: Favorites from the First Half

Not to sound like a broken record, but I can't believe we're already halfway through the year! (and even further, given how late I'm posting this lol). I've read an ungodly amount of books already, and while I try my best to shout out my favorites as I go or in my monthly wrap-ups, I don't always succeed. So Here I Am, to do a little more shouting about the 10 most memorable books or series I've read so far in 2023!

The God of Endings by Jaqueline Holland

The Spear Cuts Through Water by Simon Jimenez

Sword Stone Table ed by Jenn Northington & Swapna Krishna

Sea Hearts (The Brides of Rollrock Island) by Margo Lanagan

Spill Zone by Scott Westerfeld & Alex Puvilland

Will Darling/Lilywhite Boys by K.J. Charles

Lord Peter Wimsey by Dorothy L Sayers

The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green

84 Charing Cross Road by Helene Hanff

Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World by David Epstein

More discussion below the cut!

The God of Endings by Jaqueline Holland had me entirely engrossed. It's slow and moving and dark, with it's own take on vampirism, with any number of the associated content warnings. All the content warnings actually (but harm to animals, harm to children, and domestic abuse are some of the big ones. Does the Nazi murder make up for it?). Best described as The Historian meets everything I wanted from The Invisible Life of Addie Larue but didn't get.

The Spear Cuts Through Water by Simon Jimenez I have, in fact, already yelled about a bit. It was so good! Think A:TLA meets The Raven Tower and The Hundred Thousand Kindgoms, and queer! The thing that really blew my mind was the second-person narration, which is always a swing, and I think this nailed it! I loved how it worked with the story and frame narrative, and let me tell you, on audiobook parts of the story felt positively haunted. I won't say it's the perfect novel (I'm a little eh about the last third), but that in no way dampens my enthusiasm. cw for ritual cannibalism.

Sword Stone Table ed by Jenn Northington & Swapna Krishna is an anthology of Arthurian re-imaginings with about a 1-in-3 success rate (for me anyways. is that good for an anthology?) that snuck onto this list purely on the strength of Mayday by Maria Dahvana Headley. I just yelled about my love for unusual narrative structures, so when I tell you that this is a retelling of the Arthurian family drama set in late 19th century America, told only through found objects, newspaper clippings, and manuscript exerpts? I had *such* a great time trying to puzzle things out with my half-remembered memories of the lore (heavily corrupted by the show Merlin, lol). Additional shout-out to Spear by Nicola Griffith, which didn't make it into the collection due to length but was also amazing!

Sea Hearts (aka The Brides of Rollrock Island) by Margo Lanagan was an absolute surprise, for several reasons. For one, I own both a physical and digital copy under different titles and didn't realize it until I was cleaning up my goodreads account! And second, the Brides cover is an absolute travesty and is entirely the wrong vibe - this may be YA (technically?) but it doesn't read like it! Sea Hearts is the story of a small island community with a history of summoning wives from the sea, a tradition only whispered about until an outcast young woman revives the practices to sow discord and revenge among the community members we follow. Incredibly moving and sorrowful, this is for fans of literary, historical, and speculative fiction.

Spill Zone by Scott Westerfeld & Alex Puvilland. This graphic novel is about a city hit by an unknown disaster that has killed or mutated everything and everyone who wasn't able to evacuate in time. Our main character sneaks back in to take pictures to support herself and her little sister, and while I have some reservations about the larger plot, the art of the Zone is GORGEOUS. Sketchy, eerie, hauntingly beautiful, I loved it, enough that I have no regrets. I could see this making a great comic series or animated show instead.

Major, heartfelt shout-out to K.J. Charles, who absolutely saved my sanity for a few months there. My brain was in a weird spot for a few months and I burned through a good chunk of her backlist, so it's absolutely necessary to name drop a few of my favorites. The Will Darling series, a 1920's spy adventure/gay romance, did not immediately win me over, but exposure makes the heart grow fonder? I don't think they say that, actually, but I love a competent dumbass, and when I finally picked up on the crossover with Charles' England duo, I absolutely cackled. I can't wait to reread these! Any Old Diamonds of the Lilywhite Boys series did catch me immediately, even if I managed to read it out of order with one of it's prequel series. Jewel thieves, a heist, revenge, family drama, what's not to love? I loved every single book and novella in this series.

Lord Peter Wimsey (series) by Dorothy L Sayers. This has been a work in progress since 2022 and has consistently made my favorites lists, but truly, she saved the best for last! Murder Must Advertise was stellar, but everyone who said the Harriet Vane novels were the best is absolutely correct. I don't know why I love them, other than that they're wonderfully complex mysteries, but I do. I definitely need to find another long mystery series for my mental health or else I'm going to start these from the beginning again (I still need to read the short stories after all).

The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green. I'll be honest, I didn't write a review for this at the time, and my memory for non-fiction is terrible. But I loved this book, I love John Green, and this was fantastic on audio. Thank you John for putting hope and goodness and beauty into the world.

84 Charing Cross Road by Helene Hanff was a beautiful little book for the book lover. It's a collection of letters between the American author and a used-book seller (and family and associates) in London in the 50s and 60s. Its funny, it's friendly, it's lovely, but there's also an underlying tension that builds throughout from the repeated invitations to the author to come visit, and the book copy saying that THEY NEVER MEET. It about killed me, and did make me cry. For further reading you can also check out the author's related memoirs, The Duchess of Bloomsbury Street and Q's Legacy.

Range: Why Generalists Triumph in a Specialized World by David Epstein. Frankly, I'm impressed by my nonfiction choices so far this year. This one is what it says and it HURT. SO. MUCH. I am absolutely a generalist and it's made life frustrating, so reading this was both extremely comforting but also enraging, because society doesn't need another reason to suck. Alas.

[grayscale-kaleidoscope]

My parents are "generous" people.

It's difficult to explain my issues with this because it makes me feel very, very, very spoiled and like an ungrateful brat.

My dad texted me out of the blue today. He was asking if I'd heard from the investment company he'd set up some education fund for me twenty years ago, because that fund needs some kind of action taken once I turned 30.

That's fine. I told him the truth, that they reached out to me and we're in the process of closing out that account. I figured he was just looking for an update on that.

He asks how my new job is going, and how we're doing. I say I'm good, job's going well, etc. I hesitated over mentioning that we're moving next week, but decided to give him that little bit of an update. Said we're moving to a lovely place on a hill by the beach and really looking forward to it.

He asks if we need furniture, because they have pieces to donate that they want to keep in the family. I say I appreciate the offer, but we're good on furniture*

(We're actually going to need to buy several pieces, but I don't want to accept any more things from my parents, because they use it as a way to have Contact and it all gets very messy.)

He presses the furniture thing. Says there's some really nice pieces, they just got a table refinished, and "Two of them have your name on them, remember you said you wanted them?" (Nearly 5 years ago.)

I politely decline again.

Suddenly his tone goes cold and clipped. Last thing he says is "Send us your address when you get time." (They like to comment on how I'm always too busy to talk to them when they don't like how I'm responding to them.)

My parents are very generous, but it's with strings attached. They want a certain reaction, a certain sense of gratitude and obedience. I can turn them down now, but I still feel slimy about it, even though I technically know I did nothing wrong.

It's just complicated. I just prefer them to stay out of my life.

[galacticlamps]

actually ascension needs its own post since that's the one with the most details to speculate over and im starved for soho talk so i will talk to myself if need be

First the cover again, because I kinda can't get over it:

my only thing is that I had been hoping we might get Lizbeth on a cover again since she's never been on one of the boxsets before, despite being the 2nd person credited on all 4 of them (even if that's just alphabetical, still, she's the only one of the four main characters who never makes the cover)

But letting that go...

I know we already kinda knew the brief for this one but damn I didn't expect it to go quite this hard. Maybe that's just because the Parasite & Ashenden covers were (comparatively) similarish to each other and I was so pleased with Unbegotten's, and then got so used to it as the placeholder for Ascension while they kept postponing it, I wasn't expecting anything this colorful or detailed or with what I can't help but register as Fun New Outfits even though these are still like, pretty damn basic as far as costumes go. Still, it's a different vibe from everyone in suits and trenchcoats on every cover, technically. (Oh the woes of being an audio fan such that two characters owning sweaters actually does qualify as new information)

On top of just being visually delightful though, I know we knew religion was gonna be a fairly big part of this one, but I didn't actually expect to get quite this much of it - though I'm glad of it for a number of reasons. The BF twitter already made the ineffable joke so I don't have to, but also yeah I did very much spend all of season 2 episode 4 of good omens half convinced Samuel Barnett & Dervla Kirwan were about to pop up around any given corner (if you will go around being gay supernatural and horrible at your messy bureaucratic jobs in midcentury soho then I'm sorry, this is where my brain's gonna go) - so, fuel to that fire. But in terms of actual important things, at least one of my Soho wishes looks to be being granted because we have a Rev Edward Folgate on the cast list, which must mean we're finally meeting Norton's father, even if his mother & brother don't appear (which they could, technically, I've definitely seen BF not list all the doublings on their cast tabs before). Religion, domesticity, and the nuclear family are all things that absolutely fascinate me when it comes to Norton's character, so getting any amount of story involving his father & his church is something I've been actively hoping for for a long time now.

(I will say I'm a tiny bit bummed Saffron Coomber isn't on the cast list to play Mia again, but I kinda figured she wasn't going to be since Greg Austin's Armitage, who's making his first recurring appearance after originating in Unbegotten, was listed ever since the boxset was announced - presumably if she was also returning, that would've been handled in the same way. But since Unbegotten ended with Lizbeth and Mia going on a date, I still held out hope. Who knows though, maybe things did go well for them and Lizbeth just has a better work/life balance than Norton so she can date someone without them getting dragged into every scifi plot. I know that's not a very common accomplishment for any Torchwood agent, but a gal can hope)

At this point I know I'm completely in the realm of speculation & even wishful thinking, but I'm really really hoping we get some more clues as to Norton's overall timeline in this one, and I have a feeling that even if there's nothing as direct as dates given, the events of a plot like this one are going to heavily influence my personal interpretation of it.

To say that life & death are major themes for the soho crew feels wildly reductive, but even by Torchwood's standards and taking into account its origins as a piece of media with Jack Harkness & his newfound immortality at the heart of it, the living/dead status of this bunch has always been fantastically up in the air to me. Obviously Ghost Mission introduced Norton as kind of a ghost before revealing more obvious ghostly characters later on to which the title might have been referring, but his being from the past did beg the question of his survival into Torchwood's present era all the same, which Outbreak later alludes to much more directly, and his habit of showing up via hologram in multiple stories only further obfuscates any certainty we might have about where & when he definitely can be said to be alive and well. Then you've got Lizbeth and Gideon both being effectively 'brought back to life' via paradoxes that prevented them ever having died in the first place. Again, they are very very far from being the only Torcwhood characters this happens to (for a sprawling EU, it's really rather impressive how often & in how many different ways Torchwood as a whole manages to circle back to being about like. chaotic undead queers at the end of every day. though I suppose that consistency is part of why I keep falling in love with its different iterations again and again). That's without even getting into the question of Norton's dubious fate in God Among Us - and I say dubious because I know some people take that to be his ultimate death, but I personally think that reading something as vague as that as having any kind of finality rather goes against the spirit of this whole world/series, not just because I want him to live. (There are obviously other ways to make him survive/reappear, but I don't see this as a River Song scenario where we can safely assume one of his earlier-released adventures had to happen at the end of his personal timeline). But wherever God Among Us falls for him, he does very much meet God in it - or at least, a god, since the sentinel in Unbegotten is also described as a god of sorts, and even if he doesn't ultimately have the status of the god Jacqueline King is playing there, Unbegotten is still full to bursting with ghosts/undead/came back wrong/echo characters to continue underscoring that life/afterlife theme.

So all things considered, even allowing for the fact that we know Norton's twin hobbies are lying about himself and abusing time travel to suit his own ends/ever-shifting alliances, I find it difficult to believe we could get through a whole 6-part boxset about religion & death without something providing some kind of compelling evidence about where this adventure fits in among his other run-ins with apocalypses and gods and ghosts and dead-but-still-here characters/creatures, so I'm very much looking forward to any further exploration on that front.

And lastly, and least intellectually, I really want to know what the hell 20th-century Torchwood's obsession with Reginalds is. Reading through the cast list, I had to do two separate doubletakes over the character 'Sir Reginald Peebles' - firstly, because I had Reginald Rigsby on the brain, this being Soho (and the other Troughton brother being so active on BF's releases for this same month) - and secondly, because reading this in conjunction with the announcement for the July monthly adventure in which the new main Torchwood guy of the 20s is apparently called Sir Reginald Dellafield, there was a brief moment where I took that monthly release to be a tie-in with Ascension. I don't expect it to be, but damn. was it really so popular a name?

anyways, catch me thinking about those stained glass windows for the next couple months I guess (and knowing Torchwood Soho, for a long long time after it comes out as well lol)

[bandedbulbussnarfblat]

Your post about Daniel's LinkedIn page reminds me of a theory I had awhile back. I think Daniel wrote a "fiction" novel called The Devil's Minion back in the day, but he never got it published. He'll be reminded of it in s2 and as he's reading the old manuscript, we'll see the story onscreen

oh, that would actually be pretty cool. like we know daniel never finished the book he was writing in 85, from that one trailer. the part where they mention alice and daniel says something about never finishing the book and leaving without paying the bill. that could have been the book he was writing! i mean, probably a straight (and maybe even white) washed version of it, since it was 80s. and daniel seems to struggle with his sexuality. unless he was writing under a pseudonym, which is what he did when he wrote iwtv in the books. and

(also book lestat used a pseudonym to write his books. do you think he used daniel's pseudonym, and has basically been plagiarizing him this entire time? or did he publish under a different pen name and publish what was technically fanfic of daniel's iwtv? you don't have to answer that. i just wonder these things)

but yeah, that could have been what he was writing. maybe he meant to publish it as a sort of goodbye, or as a romantic gesture toward Armand (maybe trying to win him back? perhaps armand is tired of sharing daniel with his family? or maybe armand left him so he could have his family, but he didn't take his memories?)

then alice tells him she's pregnant. daniel realizes he can't leave her now. one kid she could manage by herself, but not two. bc it's the 80's and even though the EPA was passed in 63 it wasn't exactly strictly adhered to, and there's still that wage penalty for motherhood thing going on, and while maternity leave was given, it could still get given unpaid or underpayed. it all depended on where you worked. we didn't get fmla until 93. daniel could literally be leaving his wife and children for at least 6-12 weeks. even at 6 weeks, or hell, maybe she got those weird mom hormones and liked hulked it out and only took 4 weeks. That's still a month with no income, so the only she'd have is what's left in her and daniel's joint account, bc that's a goddamn crazy thing that married couple's do, like to this day. and daniel is drug addict, that bank account is probably in the red. and alice is probably smart if daniel falls for her, in the books his two relationships are armand and marius. armand is extremely clever. but also a manipulative bastard. marius is basically a fucking philosopher. and also a manipulative bastard. so my theory is alice is also probably smart, and at least a little bit of a bastard. so that girl definitely has a run fund.

(let me explain the run fund thing to y'all that is too young to have heard about this. when you get to a certain age--it differs depending how far down south you are--your momma pulls you aside and tells you that you need a run fund. she may not call it that, there are different names for it, or she may try to phrase it more delicately so you don't think this is just about your father, bc it applies to all men. (and if you're mom is progressive, she'll say something like, 'or maybe a woman if that's how you turn out') i am from the south. i am telling the southern tale of this, where most of us are brought up baptist, so we're supposed to not think lustful thoughts, but at the same time, there's kinda this assumption that girls are like naturally chaste. like girls don't watch porn, girls don't masturbate, girls can enjoy sex, but never desire it. at the same time there are those women. whores, sluts, hoes, bad women. and their was a tight fucking line you had to walk to prevent yourself from being one of them. you know, typical virgin/whore complex shit. anyway i think i was around 16ish when my mom told me. it's your emergency stash of money you have hid away somewhere, something secret that he (or she) doesn't know about it. it's your 'get the fuck out money'. it's your 'if something happens' money. and your momma ain't gotta tell you what if something happens means, because you already know; it's if he hits you, if he hits the kids, if he forces you into it, if he touches you like that without your permission, if he touches one of the kids like that. it's your grab the kids and go money. if you're lucky it'll get you back to family or friends who can take you in. or maybe you have enough to shack up at some cheap motel for awhile. but don't sign anything with his name, use your maiden name if you can get away with it, and never ever use any of the checks or cards with his name on it, use your cash. only your cash. take the first job you can find, no matter how shitty. but always look for something better. leave the kids with whoever you can find to keep them, and then you just keep going til you find something better and you find something better and then one day finally you can fucking breathe and you realize that you're okay that got really long and over winded but i am, so fucking high rn.

anyway, what i'm saying is alice could have reasonably had enough money to float by a month or two hidden away, but daniel wouldn't know about it anyway. so from his point of view he'd be leaving his kids with zero income for at least a month. so he couldn't be a dick and do that, he'd have to stay until at least she could go back to work.

but of course he could always leave before she has the baby, like as soon as he fucking finds out. but there's a 50/50 chance she's on his insurance because sometimes it's better to be on your spouses insurance than use your own. so he could hypothetically leave his pregnant wife without access to medical care.

maybe he decides to try to 'do the right thing' and stay with alice until she's able to make it by herself. hell, maybe he decides to stay long term bc he decides he wants to be a good father and not abandon his kids.

or he does the easy thing and is like, 'armand, babe, could we send them money? i'd feel really bad about leaving them if we didn't' and then makes puppy eyes at armand, or something more x-rated if you're nasty.

and armand is either going to erase his memory 'for his own good' so he can go live a normal human life. or daniel is going to try to call things off for good, and armand knows he won't be able to give up what they have, so his erases his memories so he can go live his mortal life, but he's like, super bitter about it. or worse option, daniel could ask armand to wipe his memories of them so he can move on.

god, i have been rambling so much. i have strayed far from the original point into what seem like random tangents, but i promise on link together in a beautiful spiderweb in brain. like that silvery stuff in that one windows loading screen or screen saver or something. i think this may be back from the windows xp days.

but my point is i really like your theory. and kinda want write fic about it one day, far away (but only with your permission of course)

[andtheny]

A Vanilla Prick wants me because I don't want him

He's lonely, desperate, and on the lamb

His ex-wife is chasin' his bank account

He thinks he can hide under my mattress

Squeeze in my closet

And nestle against my bosom like a baby lion

But I'm not your fucking mother, Vanilla Prick

A Vanilla Prick isn't always white

In fact, nine times out of ten, he's black as Africa

But skin don't matter, I can see his insides

He tastes like VANILLA

Like a virgin, he's only had sex with his ex-girlfriend

He never learned how to please a woman

That's why she left you, asshole!

She didn't give a rat's ass that you gained ten pounds, you stupid fuck

Just wanted a good time, and you failed to deliver

A Vanilla Prick loves the rat race

He's gettin' his steps in

Makin' those gains

Those muscles fail to impress me, Vanilla Prick

Not only do I find them asthetically displeasing

But, as a bonus, I've learned that a muscular men taste Vanilla

I want to fuck a cyborg, thanks

Tall or short, happy or sad

As long as he knows what the fuck he's doing

Actually, you know what?

I'm an excellent teacher

Give me a virgin, sure

I'll show them what I like

But stay the fuck away from me, Vanilla Pricks

Your ex-boyfriend tainted you

This Vanilla Prick was bisexual when I met her at the LGBT club

But her ex-boyfriend, Prince Eric, lowered her self esteem

Now she thinks she can take that out on me?

I'm sorry, did my C cups resemble his man tits?

Did I forget to shave my fucking mustache again?

My bad, this is so all on me

Listen up, Butch, you're a Hello Kitty Batman Vanilla Prick

You're obsessed with sex, erotica, monster fucking, etcetera

But you can't even be arsed to give me a fucking hug?

What a frigid Vanilla Prick

Oh, I'm sorry, how politically incorrect of me

You aren't frigid, you're asexual

My bad, my bad, let's Just Be Friends

In fact, I was looking for a roommate that doesn't secretly want to fuck me

How convenient!

Do you promise not to secretly wish you could fuck me?

If so, let's get married

Pardon, let's be roommates, I should say

Queer - Platonically, of course

Ah, I'm not allowed to flirt with my female coworkers?

I'm only allowed to have one night stands with stupid straight men?

Why, if we're just roommates?

Ooooooh, and now I'm not allowed to marry my girlfriend Robin? That's funny, my Daddy said the same thing. He ALSO told me to stay away from women and only have sex with straight men

Well, technically he told me he wanted me to find a husband, but it's synonymous, honey

Why are you fucking crying?

We're just roommates!

That's what you told your family, isn't it?

IT'S NOT LIKE WE'RE EVEN HAVING SEX, YOU POSSESSIVE DYKE

What do you mean, you secretly wanted to be more than roommates since we met at the LGBT club in 2015?

You

SAID

You

Did

Not

Want

To

Have

Sex

With

Me

You psychotic cunt!

Listen, I understand

Bitches be crazy

However, I'm damn tired of Vanilla Pricks treating me like fucking trash

Do you want to fuck or not?

Don't tease me, baby

What, did he think I wanted to look at a photograph of his penis?

Was it supposed to impress me?

I looked at it, shrugged, and said, "Look, are you DTF or not?"

He said, "I'm married!"

What a Vanilla Prick

[aikoiya]

Writing Sins - The Importance of Establishing the Rules of Your Fanfic

Pardon me, ya'll, while I vent.

Because oh my gosh...

I just read a story a while ago... An admittedly well-written story for the most part... but the Fem!Reader in it was after another woman. Now, if that was the end of it, then whatever. She's gay, now let's move on. (Well, technically, she was bi. The whole point of the story was that she'd eventually get together with this one mafia bossman, but I digress.)

But it wasn't. The narrative was that she expected to have "plenty of cute little babies" with this woman &...

Already this was delusional, but to top it all off, the setting was in a place inspired by Victorian England & she was not only a rich girl, but the heiress & only child of her family.

This... entire situation... was patently impossible!

I asked how this was supposed to be possible & the reply I got was something along the lines of "anything's possible for lesbians 😃" & I was like "No, it's not! In fact, this specifically, is not possible for lesbians! The entire reason they are considered lesbians is because neither have the necessary equipment to make it possible! If they did, then they wouldn't be lesbians! Because lesbianism is a sexuality, which the entire point of sexuality is that they are based on a person's preference for a certain, specific biological sex!!"

I just... the thing is... if this were an A/B/O situation then at least then there'd be a logical & biological explanation because 1 of the women wouldn't actually be female (which, remember, is a sex, not a gender, meaning it's immutable & not subject to change), she'd be a hermaphrodite (which is a sex based on the myth of Salmacis & Hermaphroditus in which a male & female become fused into a single entity that possesses the reproductive organs of both sexes & doesn't occur naturally in humans; distinctly different from being intersex as intersexuality is a sexual mutation & even in such situations they are either sterile or only one of their reproductive organs actually work, thus making them not true hermaphrodites), which would've been a good enough explanation for me as to how this would work, but the impression I got was that these girls would just... wishful think these theoretical children into existence because, as it stood, both were biologically female, as neither were indicated to be transwomen or hermaphrodites, & thus neither had the literal gonads to do it... And there was no mention of getting a donor...

There wasn't even a suggestion that in this world there was some way to fertilize an egg using stem cells like they're trying to do IRL. Which, in & of itself deserves an entire rant all on its own, but that's not what we're talking about here, this is about writing! So, ONWARDS!!

So... No... Just no... If you're going to make this sort of assertion at least give a biologically sound explanation as to how.

Admittedly, this universe had magic, but at the same time, you can't just say "its magic" or "a wizard did it" without explaining how the wizard did it. Magic isn't a fix-it button that makes anything & everything possible with the wave of your hands! It's a narrative device that needs to have rules! Otherwise, there's no real conflict because the characters can just ✨️magic✨️ their problems away!

Yes, Star VS the Forces of Evil's magic was like that in a lot of ways, but that's because that was just how their magic system worked & the show establishes it as such, which means that you know going in what to expect: chaos. If you wanna go that way, then sure. Go ahead, but at least bring attention to the situation & give a bullshit excuse for the why & how.

That isn't even taking into account the fact that, realistically, a rich family in a world where the media isn't at the forefront of everyone's consciousness manipulating everyone. SPECIFICALLY, in a world that is inspired by VICTORIAN ENGLAND!! Would NEVER allow this without being ostracized & labled social pariahs & the daughter a degenerate or sexual deviant & the whole family lynched. (That might be a bit of an exaggeration, but I digress.)

Part of the entire themeing of Victorian England is that they were repressed & puritan & all about facades & false perfection, to the point where sex was more of a business transaction! That's part of why it's such a compelling thematic location. Because then you get to juxtapose it with a character or characters that break the mold & challenge societal norms. Otherwise, it isn't a very good inspiration!

Not only that, but this girl was the only fucking child of this wealthy family which would, realistically, put even more pressure on her to find a man to marry & have the children of!

The very idea that this family would actively support such a union in this veerrry specific situation, is just ludicrous. Which, in the story, they just... did... & in a way that made it seem as if the situation was perfectly normal & would not cause consequences. Namely, them having to eventually forfeit their fortune to some other part of the family, if not an entirely different family that they were unrelated to, when neither their daughter nor her wife produced an heir... (Which, if the parents had been painted as loving & accepting & supportive, then I would've been willing to believe as them being willing to accept those consequences for the sake of their daughter's happiness. But they weren't. They were your typical, rich, snobbish, emotionally constipated, socialite parents that stifle & control their spoiled, & equally emotionally constipated children for their own benefits.)

Hell, the author could've kept the whole "female lead living in oppressive society is bi & wants this other girl" thing if they'd have focused on the societal pressure to be straight & produce heirs & how difficult it was to be bisexual/lesbian in a place & time where such things were subject to cruelty. But they didn't. It was just normal & there were no consequences whatsoever to being like that. Which was, by far, the most unbelievable part of the situation.

These imbossibilities weren't even mentioned, let alone addressed, as if with the expectation that those reading would just be like, "I see no logical discrepancy here! This is a plausible situation that can absolutely happen in this specific setting!"

Listen, ya'll, I am willing to stretch my suspension of disbelief pretty far so long as you give even a half-hearted attempt at making the plot at least SEEM plausible. Hell, even a bullshit explanation that at least sounds like it could possibly work (but really couldn't if you think hard enough) would've gotten a pass.

And if the story just had one of these many logical fallacies, I might have been more willing to swallow the bullshit, but it wasn't.

It was all of them on top of each other & I just couldn't.

Look, write whatever you want, but if you're posting this stuff, expect to get criticism. That's just how the world works! And if you do post writing with plot points that are factually impossible based on common sense, without *clearly stated* alterations to the basic rules of life, then don't expect all of those reading to be on board!

Let me make this clear. This isn't a complaint based on discrimination. Well, okay, maybe discrimination... specifically against bad writing... I physically cannot read something that is badly written.

Like, don't get me wrong, I'm not expecting anyone to write anything worthy of a Pulitzer or whatever. I'm just asking for a reasonable explanation!

Good day!

Aikoiya's Writing Tips Masterlist