#like hi yes I’d like to write about romance while questioning my own ability to feel that specific… thing? emotion?

[dinitride-art]

looks at ao3, finds nothing new that I want to read right at this moment (probably a fic in there I’m gonna end up reading later and being like woah this is great! But I don’t have the energy for that right now). Goes to my own works page. Stares. Glances over a multi chapter fic (incomplete), moves on. Sees another multi chapter fic, my baby, (incomplete) but… there’s not much else left to do. What if… no. I couldn’t. I- I shouldn’t. But… maybe… if I opened the document I could just… look and see

[yannig]

Koisenu Futari’s Kazu-kun: one step further into the amato-normativity discussion

So. What’s up with Kazu-kun. Why does he deserve his own post.

Kazu-kun starts as a background character, and then progressively becomes the third main character of the show.

And I love him. Which is not a small feat because I started out hating him. And all of it was very much on purpose.

Kazu-kun, I believe, exists as a vessel for the allo audience.

He’s there to asks all the questions the allo viewers are asking themselves, and then to learn and grow from the answers, and become both a friend to our protagonists and an ally to aroace people in general.

He exemplifies the arc the allo viewer would ideally go through while watching the show.

The thing about Koisenu Futari is, it’s a show made from the perspective of aroace characters, for aroace viewers. It’s about our fears, our insecurities, our experience with amato- and allo-normativity, our lives.

And it’s good thing! It’s a significant part of why I love it so much!

But it also means that it’s risking loosing it’s allo audience a bit. (I’d be curious to know how many allo people have watched this show at all tbh). Almost all the other allo characters in the show exist so our protagonists can experience being faced with yet another form of amatonormativity. Kazu-kun exist so an allo character can experience being faced with aromanticism and asexuality.

And it impacts his entire character, including and especially the flaws that made me hate him at the beginning.

Part of it is, of course, because a character needs flaws to grow out of, as the most basic way to write a character arc.

For example, he begins as the most Straight Man™ ever. He thinks Sakuko belongs to him because they dated in the past (are kinda technically on a break the situation wasn’t clear the expectations were very different), thinks cooking is easy and a woman’s job and of course doesn’t know how and thinks it’s perfectly normal because he’s a man, absolutely cannot fathom how a man could not be sexually attracted to a woman he’s even somewhat close to.

All those traits are flaws he will overcome as he grows and becomes a better man.

But part of it is also traits he needs to play his role well.

He is, for one, a very nosy character, with a strong sens of entitlement that means he’ll stop at little to get his answers. Which of course makes him absolutely insufferable at the beginning! I spent almost all of episode 4 wanting to slap him! But it’s a necessary character trait for him to actually ask out loud the questions the allo audience is quietly wondering about. If he was a proper and polite Japanese man, he wouldn’t be asking those questions, and therefore wouldn’t be fulfilling his role in the story.

And then he learns. All his questions and indiscretions get him somewhere, which is a much better understanding of aroace people. And with some luck, the allo audience learned with him, without needing to invade actual aroace people’s privacy!

(yes I’m still salty about ep4, why do you ask. just because it was narratively necessary doesn’t make it any less hard to watch)

To be perfectly honest, from a pure character development perspective, I think he changes a bit too quickly. But, well. The show is only 8 episodes. Also that’s my only complaint about this show.

He first learns how to cook, and most importantly, instantly apologizes to Sakuko for asking her to cook like it was nothing. This ability to 1) recognize when he was wrong and 2) apologize for it, is key in his whole development and one of the main reasons I’m ready to accept that he did a 180 so quickly.

Cooking, of course, if a synecdoche for every gendered expectation about couples. He’s not just learning how to cook, he’s learning that the things he was taught to expect from his future wife actually take work and are very much doable and enjoyable as a man.

Most importantly, he learns that romance is not the only register he can use to interact with women; in this case especially Sakuko. In fact, at the end of episode 4, he offers that since she is aroace, they could have a QPR together.

(the show doesn’t call it a QPR, doesn’t use the word at all, but that’s exactly what it is, both the actual arrangement between Sakuko and Takahashi, and what Kazu-kun offers to Sakuko)

So, big points for getting what Minori can’t seem to grasp in ep 6: QPR are not reserved to aromantics! Really important lesson that a lot of allies never learn.

In this specific case, I don’t think it would have worked, and it can very well be interpreted as him refusing to let go. I don’t think a QPR with the woman he’s still very much in love with is a good idea. And while he has learned a lot, he’s still pretty new to the whole thing, and I think he’d still have too many expectations that would end up hurting Sakuko.

And once Sakuko has taken the time to think about it and tells him no, not only does he listen, not only doesn’t he get upset, but he immediately reassure her that they are still friends and will keep being friends.

In that way, this whole journey of his allows Kazu-kun and Sakuko to get back the easy and joyous friendship they seemed to have lost when they broke up. Which is both the biggest and final proof of maturity on his part and the best thing he got from the whole adventure.

Once he understand that Sakuko and Takahashi are aroace and quite happy with it, he also becomes their first defender. He tells Minori off twice when she steps out of line, and is ready to correct one of their colleagues when he assumes that he and Sakuko are a couple. Good example of how to be an ally.

Faced with micro-aggression (or even overt and intentional aggression), minorities:

might get overwhelmed by emotions and are almost certainly more sensitive to it than allies

are less likely to be listened to if they correct the person, because they are a minority

often cannot afford to be angry or aggressive or anything other than incredibly diplomatic about it without being told off, a problem allies face a lot less

Hence why a big part of allies' job is correcting other privileged people. Great ally-ship, take notes everyone.

In conclusion, I said last time that Minori and Haruka exemplify how amatonormativity also harms allo people. I’d argue that, with all this:

Kazu-kun shows what allo people have to gain from getting rid of it.

(his best friend back, at least one new friend, a new vital skill, and a lot less expectations)

[honestlywtfisgoingon]

A Match Set

Chapter 2

Chapter 1

Pairing: Benny Watts x Reader

Summary: After meeting one night in New York, you and Benny Watts are drawn to each other. As you go through different experiences with one another, you grow closer until it finally gets to be too much for Benny.

Word Count: 2685 Damn

Warnings: Alcohol and also a little sad?

Notes: hehe the plot continues... also please give feedback I’m still new to writing and can use the help 🥺

Your first date with Benny was like all your experiences with Benny. It started out ordinary, and ended up somewhere completely different.

He took you to a small cafe, one of those hidden spots known only to New York natives.

You and Benny sat down in a little corner of your own, and you felt an imbalance when he didn’t look nervous at all. After you ordered you relaxed a bit, finding out that he was just as anxious as you were. Sure, Benny had an incredible poker face, but the way he kept tapping his cheek while he leaned his chin on his hand had been the tell.

On the outside it looked as though the two of you were on a regular date, exchanging all the usual smiles and small flirtations, but that’s where it got a little more interesting.

Benny wasn’t conventional and didn’t care to be, and you were always trying to get past the surface of things. Neither of you cared for menial small talk, and instead went straight into a passionate exchange of thoughts and views. You ended up talking like you had known each other for years. There was a connection there, an obvious chemistry that you hadn’t found before.

There was a second date after that, and it was even better than the last. He had taken you to dinner that time, and once again you found yourselves falling back into discussion about various thoughts and ideas, nothing boring or ordinary.

As you cracked jokes back and forth and learned more about each other, you had a warm feeling. You recognized that for all these last few months, being with Benny was the first time you really felt at home in New York.

That was before, but this is now. Now is when a part of you shattered. Now is just after you got a devastating call that your father was sick.

“Thank you,” you said before hearing the click of placing the phone back on the receiver.

Thank you for what? You were just told your father was dying and you were supposed to say thank you? You had finally gotten the chance to go beyond your small town, thinking everything at home was safe, that it was taken care of. It was your father that convinced you of that.

Living where you did had it’s limits, and there wasn’t much for you there. He pushed you to get out and explore, telling you that you didn’t need to worry about him.

You were taken from your thoughts when you looked at the time, realizing Benny would be picking you up soon. You could’ve canceled, considering the recent circumstances, but you were grasping for normalcy at the moment, trying to shove away the awful reality you were just hit with. You told yourself it wasn’t because you were running away, you were just being considerate of benny. Yes, you were just being considerate. That meant you could push off thinking about all this until you got home.

This time, you and Benny were walking together in Central Park, and you were trying to pay attention to what he was saying as best you could.

“Hey, y/n?” You heard benny’s voice break through the numbness.

“Sorry, what?” You were embarrassed that he caught you blatantly ignoring what he was saying.

“I was asking if you were able to come to to the championship, but I think you’ve got other things on your mind.” He didn’t seem offended, more concerned.

“I’d love to, I know how important chess is for you, and I haven’t gotten the chance to see you get really competitive.” He would’ve been happier to hear your answer had he not seen straight though you.

“Right now, you’re what’s really important to me. Just tell me what’s really going on.” His admittance for caring about you would’ve made filled your heart yesterday, but today it made you want to run away.

“Nothing is going on.”

“You’ve been off the whole day, I just want to know why.”

“Nothing is going on. Why are you so convinced that there is?” Your tone became slightly more aggressive.

“Hey, you don’t have to tell me right-“

“Just leave it Benny!” You snapped, letting go of his hand and and walking away from him. You didn’t know why you took off from someone you liked so much, but you didn’t really know why anything was happening at all.

You were stopped as Benny ran after you and grabbed you hand firmly. You tried to pull away, but he was stronger than you. He spun you around to face him. You became acutely aware of the tears that had started to fall from your eyes. Looking up into his eyes was your breaking point.

You let out a sob before caving into him. You felt his arms wrap around you before letting him usher you to a bench. He held you for what seemed like forever, until you were too tired to cry anymore. He was rubbing you back and gave you a little smile when you faced him. You apologized and hastily wiped away your tears, but he insisted that it was ridiculous of you to be sorry. You still felt guilty after your breakdown, so you explained what was going on to make it up to Benny. You couldn’t exactly run away anymore, physically or emotionally.

“It’s my dad. I got a call this morning. He’s sick, but he wants me to stay here. How am I supposed to stay here, dealing with a new job, a new life really, while my dad’s back home dying?” You let Benny see all the stress you were under, ready for him to leave now that he’s seen you as a mess.

“All those things, you have to take one at a time. If your dad’s what’s important right now, just focus on that.” It was easier said than done, but Benny wasn’t the emotional type and he didn’t know exactly what to say, but he cared, that much was clear. You just nodded, trying to pull yourself back together. “Are you going to listen to him? Are you going to stay here?” You could tell that behind his question, he was scared that you would say no.

“I- I don’t know yet.”

“Whatever you need, I’m here.” He said as he gently placed a hand on your cheek. It was smooth and warm and you wanted to lean into it, but you snapped out of it.

“Maybe what we both need is for you not to here.” You didn’t want to hurt him, but your walls had rushed back up. You had so many things going on, and the last thing you needed was a boyfriend. It pained you to say it, but you wanted to be honest.

“I don’t have to be here as... whatever we have going on now... but I can be here as a friend.” As of today, romance was off the table for you, but a friend was different, and Benny wasn’t the type to let go of you so easily, even if a friendship was all he could get.

You just nodded and looked down into your lap, not knowing what to do now. Benny knew it was time for silence, so he held your face in his hands so you looked up at him. He didn’t say anything as he used the pads of his thumbs to wipe away the tears sitting on your cheeks. It wasn’t a romantic act, it was more endearing, a quiet action as if to say that he was willing to catch you if you fell.

You let out a small laugh at his little gesture. His eyes radiated a sort of comfort now that you he was edging into a part of your life that even you avoided.

With the intention of continuing your date that wasn’t really a date anymore, he grabbed your hand to pull you up from the bench. When he tried to let go, you didn’t let him. He looked at you curiously but he didn’t question it. You didn’t even know why you did it, still mentally screaming to push him away. You both just ended up going along with it, holding hands for the rest of the day until he walked you back home.

Nearly 3 weeks had passed since then and you hadn’t gone out or had contact with anyone. Despite your moment with Benny, you had still distanced yourself from him. Holed up in your apartment, existing off of gin, cigarettes, and frozen foods; ignoring calls, presumably from your friends.

You sat in the middle of the living room floor, forcing yourself to sketch. It had been therapeutic for you before, but now you found yourself more agitated as your drawings felt forced.

“Argh!” You yelled out into the room as you threw the papers across the floor. The one thing that you could always turn to was your ability to do art, and now you felt a block.

After taking a swig of gin, you laid back on the floor. You had turned to alcohol after another call with your father. He demanded that you stay in New York and that you go on with your life. Instead you felt like you were at a standstill, unable to keep going knowing that the one person left in your life wouldn’t make it another couple of months, and yet you were unable to see him. It made you hurt and angry that he didn’t want you home, but you wouldn’t go against his dying wishes.

You groaned when you heard the sound of the phone. You dragged your hands across your face when it wouldn’t stop ringing, forcing yourself up to confront whoever was pestering you.

“What the fuck!”

“Glad to know you’re alive.” Bennys voice greeted you.

“Can’t you tell when someone wants to be alone?” You missed Benny, but you were slightly drunk and your defenses were up.

“What someone wants and what someone needs are two very different things.”

“Well then tell me what I need.” You said sarcastically.

“You should come out with us. We’ve been calling, Cleo and Annette and the rest of us. We haven’t heard from you.”

“Well the reason you haven’t heard from me is because I haven’t been answering.”

“Funny,” he said humorlessly, “we all miss you.” He paused, “I miss you. And I said I’d always be here so I have to make good on my promise.”

You paused. You had to admit, you missed them and Benny too, but everything just seemed so scary right now. For all your philosophies and ideas, you were hiding from your own thoughts. Going out with people would only expose them.

“I can’t.”

“You don’t have to have a night out, but have coffee with me at least.”

“Benny I-“

“Great. I’ll be there in five.”

“What? Benny no-“ He hung up. The bastard hung up on you. His audacity was what actually made you laugh for the first time in days. After a minute of laying on the floor, you gathered energy to trudge over to the bathroom and make an attempt to clean yourself up. Looking at yourself in the mirror, you made a grimace at your reflection. You brushed your hair and washed your face, brushing your teeth twice to get rid of the alcohol on your breath. You swiped some face makeup to conceal your dark circles and changed out of the pajamas you had been living in.

You buzzed Benny in, expecting him to wait downstairs in the lobby like usual. Instead you heard a knock at the door in the middle of clearing things up. You got flustered as you rushed around to pick up glasses, pillows and other articles littering the floor.

“I thought we were going for coffee,”You said as you opened the door, panting slightly.

“I thought I would make things easy, come to you.” He said as he made his way in, slinging his arm around your shoulder, “plus ive never been in here.” He took a look around, making no comments about the state of your apartment. He made himself comfortable, going through your kitchen, presumably looking for coffee or something to eat. “Do you want anything? More gin maybe?” He said as he picked up an empty bottle sitting on the counter.

“Benny-“ you warned, silencing him. He joined you on the couch with some chips he found in the cabinets and a can of coke.

“We don’t have to talk about anything serious, I just don’t want you to be alone. For my own sake really.” He turned his head away from you while saying the last part.

“You know I should be a dick more often, I’m making you all soft.” You nudged him in the shoulder as a small smile crept up on his lips, lightening the mood. Something about him being there made you unconsciously drop your facade. You had to admit it was nice to relax for a moment.

“Hey don’t go telling everyone.”

You didn’t talk about anything serious like Benny said you wouldn’t. After a while you eased into laughing and chatting casually. Eventually the conversation reached a comfortable lull.

“I missed you too you know. I didn’t say it over the phone.” You told him. Having him here with you made you feel bad for your outburst. You admired his patience for you.

“I knew.” He shrugged as he gave you a sideways little smirk.

“cocky bastard.” You said jokingly.

“Your favorite cocky bastard” he tilted his head towards you as he lifted his brow, smiling.

“Top 3 maybe.” You leaned back like you were pretending to think about it.

Suddenly you remembered what you talked about before the little breakdown you had on your walk.

“The championship! Do you still want me to go?” You sat up with your sudden remembrance.

“Course I do. I didn’t know you would still be up for it.” Benny looked happy, but you could tell he didn’t want to get his hopes up.

“I didn’t think I was, but I didn’t want to miss you winning.” You ruffled his fluffy blonde hair. He gave you that cocky smirk again. You really won points by stroking bennys ego.

“Well we can drive together then. It’s next week.” He said it nonchalantly, but he smiled as he took a sip of his drink.

You paused, not realizing the championship was so soon. You thought you had at least a month. You didn’t feel as though you were ready to enter back into the world yet. Just Benny was alright but having to hold your own with all those people while Benny played scared you. Benny caught your hesitation and went to hold your hand. They were chess players hands, soft with long fingers that intertwined with yours. They were cold and his rings were a bit uncomfortable, but your breath still hitched a bit.

No. You said you wouldn’t get involved with him. Still, you kept your hand in his. It was probably the one mildly romantic thing either of you could get without risking the friendship falling apart at this time.

“How exciting,” you finally continued. You lifted your coke and you and Benny cheers-ed together. Once again that warm feeling of home crept in, that feeling you got when being with Benny. No matter how many walls you built up, Benny, someone you hadn’t even known for more than a couple months, had an amazing way of bursting through.

Just this morning you were firmly committed to becoming a hermit, and now you were planning a road trip. You chalked it up to Benny being special to you. No, you pushed that thought away again. Special in a friend way. That’s what you needed, and that’s what he was willing to be. You were in a state of conflict around him, shoving him away and holding his hand to pull him close. You shook off your thoughts and looked at Benny, and there was a moment where his eyes shone with admiration, and then it was gone as he turned his head away and continued to talk about one of his chess feats while you listened attentively, just happy to be around him again, even if it was unwillingly at first.

[sshannonauthor]

Loved TMF! And I just want to thank you so much for writing a tender, intimate sex scene that wasn't penetration-centred & focused female pleasure. And I loved that Arcturus wanted Paige to show him how to touch her, too. It's my fave love scene penned! I personally find the kissing-straight-to-penetration scenes in books/tv really yikes as a woman. I was wondering if you intentionally moved against the grain for m/f sex scenes, or if there was no motivation behind the type of sex shown?

Okay, I said I wouldn’t answer spoiler questions for a year but . . . I really like this one and I’m worried it will get buried in my inbox, so I’m going to tag and hope for the best. 

Spoilers below the cut. 

First and foremost, I wrote the scene that felt most natural for the characters at this point in the story. Aside from her encounter with Reuben, this is Paige’s first ever sexual experience. It made perfect sense to me that Arcturus would want to focus on her. He is a generous lover anyway, and finds a lot of pleasure in his partner’s pleasure – but I thought it was especially important for him to let Paige lead at this moment, given that (1) she is far less experienced than he is, (2) her only other sexual experience was painful and traumatising, and (3) she is trusting him with her body, which has been through a great deal of physical abuse. As well as that, Arcturus is physically much larger and stronger than Paige, with the ability to restrain her, which she knows. 

So he wants her to be confident that she can control what happens. He wants her to be able to focus on herself and how she feels. He knows people have put their hands on her body without her consent. He asks her to show him how to touch her not only because he wants to know what makes her feel good, but also how to avoid what makes her feel trapped and afraid. There was no way he was going to centre his own pleasure or expect her to reciprocate, and honestly, I think it would have been wrong of him to do that. 

However, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t conscious of this being an M/F scene. I did want to make a point of centring Paige and not leaping straight from kissing to PIV. I agree with you that mainstream media doing that so often is quite strange – while I imagine it’s common in the romance genre to see M/F scenes that explore intimacy in separate scenes to PIV, it’s less common than I’d like in the media I’ve personally consumed. I also wanted to make sure there was explicit verbal consent in the scene. Again, that was important for their characters, but also because I think that we, as creators, can help destroy the false idea that verbal consent is not sexy. 

So there was intention, yes. But it was also just what made sense for Paige and Arcturus. Thank you so much for the kind words about it. 

[h2bakugou]

Heh bitchhhhh 🥴🥴🥴, can i request a bakugo x reader. The reader has a showstopper quirk were they can make people break out into song and dance and when kidnapped by the league they force them to preform “ive got a dream” from tangled. P.s play bloxburg with me 🥺👉🏼👈🏼

a/n: heyyyy bitchhhh, lmfao yes, thank you for drafting this idea to me in my bedroom, and we can play bloxburg soon. i had so much fun writing this omg, 

the song is from tangled so credit to tangled for most of the dialogue/song!

summary: upon running into the league of villains, you and bakugou decide it’s best to just try and get away instead of staying and fighting, but your quirk is going to affect all in the area.

key: (y/n) - your name / (f/n) - first name / (l/n) - last name / (e/c) - eye color / (h/c) - hair color / showstopper - your quirk

warnings: swearing, fluff, angst, this is a certified crackfic brought to you by my sister’s amazing brain.

wordcount: 1.7k

»»————-　★　————-««

»»————-　★　————-««

It’s a pretty average day, nothing crazy happening. for a grade in class, you’ve been assigned to patrol near campus.

And you were paired with none other than your crush, Bakugou.

The tension between the two of you was palpable, but it was a battle between knowing if Bakugou was aware of your quirk or not. You were worried.

As the tension settled, thickening with every passing second, every breath feeling harder to push out than the last, Bakugou was tired of the silence.

“Oi! Say something.” Bakugou’s harsh voice cut through the silence like a knife. It was unexpected, and it startled you. You looked over at him and cracked a smile.

“Sorry! I’m just thinking, what exactly are we looking for on this patrol?” You ask, deciding it was best to not worry if he knew about your quirk or not, he was in your class, surely he had to know.

“It’s a patrol. We’re not looking for something specific dumbass. We’re looking for anything out of the ordinary.” Bakugou’s words weren’t meant to hurt you, in fact, Bakugou began to think about if what he had said had been to harsh.

He’d been suffocating the feelings of a crush toward you for a while, and this patrol with one another didn’t help. Kirishima nor Kaminari were here to keep him grounded, he was going to be a mess.

A few screams caught your attention. Darting over to the noise, a lady was running away from an alley. Glancing at Bakugou, the two of you rushed in, not expecting what you saw.

The light from an open door illuminated a portion of the alley at the end, the rest shadowed in darkness from the buildings looming above.

Stepping into the lit room, the door was harshly shut and locked behind you, your eyes focusing on none other than the League of Villains.

“Shit.” You cursed, staring at the group of rag-tag villains with dangerous abilities.

“Well isn’t this ironic.” Tomura Shigaraki trotted over, standing oddly, almost hunched over as he scratched at the side of his neck.

“That can’t be healthy.” You whispered, cringing at the unnerving sound of his fingernails scratching against his raw skin.

“Die!-”

“Bakugou wait!” You pulled him back from lunging at the group, taking a step back away from them.

“We gotta stop them! What are you doing?” Bakugou yelled, glaring at you.

“Do you really think we can stop all of them at once? That’s suicide! Think dumbass!” You hit the top of his head lightly with a fist and groaned.

“That’s my line!” Bakugou grunted, looking back at the league. Shigaraki stood up straight and sighed, flexing his hand.

“What ideas do you have?” Bakugou hated asking the question, but he couldn’t use his. He’d cause to much damage, and structural damage to the bottom floor would cause the building to collapse.

“I have one but-”

“Then use it!”

“I can’t! My quirk it’ll-” You knew this was going to happen.

“I’m getting tired of your bickering. Dabi-”

“Use your quirk and stop wasting time!” Bakugou shakes you, gripping your shoulders harshly. It hurt but you activated your quirk and all the lights went out.

A single light shone down and Shigaraki stepped forward. He wasn’t moving on his own accord, and everyone was just watching as you raised your hands, seemingly controlling him like a puppet.

As music began to play, Shigaraki began to sing.

“I’m malicious, mean, and scary. My sneer could curdle dairy. And violence wise, my hands are not the cleanest.” Shigaraki’s eyes were wide, still conscious of everything that was happening, he was unhappy with the events unfolding.

The rest of the league sat immobile as they watched the scene unfold, Dabi trying to hold back a laugh, Kurogiri being ultimately curious, and Toga happy as can be.

“But despite my evil look, and my temper, and my hook, I’ve always yearned to be a concert pianist.” Shigaraki was moved over to where a piano sat, coincidentally still in pretty okay shape. Guess hiding out in yet another bar had its perks.

“Can’tcha see me on the stage performin’ Mozart? Tickilin’ the ivories ‘til they gleam. Yep, I’d rather be called deadly, for my killer show-tune medley, thank you! ‘Cause way down deep inside I’ve got a dream!” Shigaraki’s fingers danced across the keys, always having one on each hand raised as to not decay the entire piano.

It was you controlling him playing, not him at all. Shigaraki had never touched a piano in his life, yet it was very interesting to seemingly be able to play it perfectly.

“He’s got a dream! He’s got a dream!” The rest of the league joined in, singing along with him.

“See I ain’t as cruel and vicious as I seem! Though I do like breaking femurs, you can count me with the dreamers Like everybody else, I’ve got a dream!” Shigaraki ended his verse off with a groovy riff on the keys, the spotlight jumping over to Dabi.

“I’ve got scars, and lumps, and bruises. Plus something here that oozes. And let’s not even mention my complexion.” Dabi stepped forward, his hands pointing out parts on his body.

“But despite my extra toes, and my goiter, and my nose, I really wanna make a love connection.” Dabi’s eyes widened as he sang the words, your fingers wiggling around, controlling his movements.

“Can’t you see me with a special little lady, rowin’ in a rowboat down the stream?” Dabi sat on a stool and mimicked rowing in a boat, continuing his verse.

“Though I’m one disgusting blighter, I’m a lover, not a fighter! ‘Cause way down deep inside I’ve got a dream!” Dabi jumped up form his stool and stood in the middle of the room.

“He’s got a dream!” The league sang.

"I’ve got a dream!” Dabi continued.

“He’s got a dream!”

“And I know one day romance will reign supreme! Though my face leaves people screaming, there’s a child behind it, dreaming. Like everybody else, I’ve got a dream!” Dabi danced his way over to Shigaraki.

“Magne would like to quit and be a florist!”

“Kurogiri does interior design.”

“Twice is into mime, Toga’s cupcakes are sublime!”

“Mr. Compress knits.”

“Giran sews.”

“Muscular does little puppet shows!”

“And Spinner collects ceramic unicorns~!” 

"What about you?” Shigaraki steps toward Bakugou who’s eyes widen in surprise as they quickly dart to you and then back to Shigaraki.

You were controlling everyone, the only downside to your quirk, is everyone in the area is affected. You control those in the room, even Bakugou. You just hoped he wasn’t going to hate you after this.

“I’m sorry me?” Bakugou asks, staring at Shigaraki. Dabi steps forward too.

“What’s your dream?” Dabi asks, pulling him into the center of the room where the spotlight shone.

“No, no no, sorry boys, I don’t sing.” Bakugou replied coolly. You stifled a laugh as he stared at you.

The league glared at him as the music kicked up again.

“I have dreams like you, no really! Just much less, touchy-feely. They mainly happen somewhere warm and sunny!” Bakugou began to sing, dancing around the bar.

“On an island that I own, tanned, and rested, and alone, surrounded by enormous piles of money!” Bakugou laid on the bar counter, propped up on his side as he pretended to relax on a beach.

“I’ve got a dream!”

“I’ve got a dream!” The rest of the league joined back in singing, while you pulled Bakugou off the counter, still controlling the others. You had to get out of here while they were still distracted. The song was almost over.

“She’s got a dream, he’s got a dream, they’ve got a dream, we’ve got a dream!” The league sang together.

“So our diff’rences ain’t really that extreme!”

“Call us brutal!” Shigaraki started.

“Sick.” Dabi added.

“Sadistic!” Twice and Toga sang harmoniously.

"And grotesquely optimistic.” Kurogiri sang, his voice was surprisingly really good.

“‘Cause way down deep inside, we’ve got a dream!” The league was singing together again.

You pulled Bakugou out of the bar and helped him down the alley as the two of you ran away, heading back toward the campus to let the heroes know.

“I’ve got a dream!” Shigaraki started again.

“I’ve got a dream!” Dabi was next.

“I’ve got a dream!”

“I’ve got a dream!”

“I’ve got a dream!” Kurogiri, Compress and Twice joined in.

“I’ve got a dream!” Toga smiled as she joined in. She was having a blast.

“Yes, way down deep inside I’ve got a dream!” They all joined in for the last line as the music faded out.

The lights returned to normal and everyone was able to move on their own.

“What the fuck!” Shigaraki cursed, shaking his body out as a chill raced through him.

“That was horrible!” Dabi groaned, staring at Shigaraki.

“I didn’t know you could play the piano!” Toga rushed over to Shigaraki.

“I can’t.” Shigaraki glared at the blonde girl.

“And who knew Kurogiri could sing so well!” Twice laughed.

“Never speak of this to anyone.” Shigaraki groaned, taking a breath from the entire show.

- - -

“Why’d you make me sing?!” Bakugou groaned as he held your hand, pulling you into the main campus building.

“My quirk affects everyone in the area. I didn’t have much of a choice. You had to do something or it would’ve messed up.” You sighed.

“Whatever. I guess it wasn’t so bad.” 

“You have a nice voice.” You compliment him. Bakugou’s cheeks twinge red as he thinks about what you just said.

“It was kind of funny to see them all sing and dance like that huh?” You question, gripping his hand a bit softer, your own face heating up as he runs his thumb across the back of your hand.

“It was something alright. Let’s just get this dealt with. And don’t you dare tell anyone about this!” Bakugou stops, pulling you into him.

“I won’t, I promise!” You smile, looking into his crimson eyes.

“Good.” Bakugou’s eyes flick down to your lips and then back up to your eyes.

He pulls you in for a quick kiss, his lips locking onto yours for a few seconds before pulling away.

“Or that.” He pouts, huffing his cheeks as he returns to walking, leaving you stunned as you slowly catch up, excitement bubbling inside you.

»»————-　★　————-««

masterlist

[ohwereusingourmadeupnames]

Let Me Get Close To You

Pairing: Peter Parker/Tony Stark Rating: Explicit (E) Notes: This is my fic for my @starkerfestivals summer BINGO “wrong number” square. I sat down to write this a couple of days ago & just couldn’t stop - I hope you guys enjoy the cute little verse I created (that I’ll more than likely revisit soon!!). Here’s my bingo card  - if you see something on there you might want written, shoot me a message!!!  Word Count: 7K Warnings: There’s a tiny bit of smut in here, but it’s me writing, so when is that not the case? Summary: 

Stuck with the worst professor for Nuclear Science, Peter tries to vent his frustrations to Ned - only to send a desperate text message to Tony Stark, instead. When an immediate spark and so many things in common make it easy for Peter to fall further for the elegant genius, what’s the worst that could really happen? 

Or: the one where Peter texts the wrong number & romance ensues.

Read on AO3 here. 

---- 

Fuming from a frustrating Nuclear Science class, Peter maturely stomped his way out of the engineering building. They were only two weeks into the semester and the old man already had Peter on edge. His major revolved around the class and his ability to get the most out of the information. The dinosaur that stood at the front of the lecture hall every day hadn’t had an original thought since the 90s and refused to see when others did. Much like every old white man, Dr. Milner’s ideas were the be all end all of a science that changed by the millisecond.

Still pretty new to campus after a late sophomore year transfer, Peter didn’t have many people to turn to that weren’t his nerdy and standoffish teammates on the Academic Decathlon team – most of those guys lived in a world a couple steps from the norm, happily keeping to themselves. Though Peter existed there eighty percent of the time, his need to be social and fill a space in the real world made it impossible to commit to that sort of isolation fully. Straddling the line made it difficult to exist on either side – Peter’s favorite pieces of himself were what kept people away, no matter the lifestyle.

With his mind so heavy with all sorts of negativity, Peter suddenly found himself homesick; he spent so much of his life trying to escape the streets of New York – so far from home now, Peter missed them desperately. Thinking about his tangible connection to his favorite urban wasteland, Peter pulled his phone out and hastily typed in Ned’s new number.

Peter Parker [1:23PM]: Hi, I hate it here. Peter Parker [1:24PM]: Dr. Milner is out to get free thinkers. I may not survive the next fourteen weeks.

Peter already felt a little better after typing the words – the mere ability to get one of his many worries off his chest did wonders. Until his phone pinged with a new text message notification, of course.

Nimble fingers pulled the phone from his pocket, his eyes carelessly looking over the screen as it unlocked. Expecting to see Ned’s name there, Peter almost threw the phone to the ground when Siri’s suggestion registered.

Maybe – Tony Stark [1:26PM]: Hi stranger! I think this was meant for someone else, but I too think Dr. Milner is out to squash any new idea that doesn’t fit the mold. In his forty-year career, he hasn’t changed a bit.

Another text message was below it, but Peter forced himself to stop reading – his heart felt like it might beat out of his chest already, too much excitement at once couldn’t be good. Out of all the numbers he could’ve accidentally typed, Tony Stark, New York’s genius and resident beauty, Peter’s secret (though not so much) crush, ended up on the other side of the line. The unbelievability of the idea made Peter consider a well thought out prank. Then again, how did any of his fellow classmates know Tony Stark’s personal number?

Sucking in a deep breath, Peter made himself look at the second text message waiting unread.

Maybe – Tony Stark [1:27PM]: I’m not sure how you got this number, but I sincerely hope you make it out alive. If you’re in Milner’s class, you’re on the Nuclear track, which means you must be smart. Trust me, the world needs your future contributions, whatever they might be.

Peter gripped the phone a little harder after reading through the second message over and over again. He let his eyes take in each of the words, wondering, if it really was Tony Stark, how anyone ever survived talking to him. In so few sentences, Peter already felt discombobulated, both more confident and turned around than just seconds before. Aside from his infatuation with the man, Peter understood Tony Stark’s contributions to the technology community and the world at large more than most.

It took him a few minutes to convince himself to text back – every time he tried to type something, his fingers froze just centimeters above the screen. There were so many things he wanted to say, so many questions he wanted to ask to make sure he wasn’t getting catfished. Instead, Peter took the direct route, his courage obviously all or nothing in the face of something as big as an accidental interaction with Tony Stark.

Peter Parker [1:35PM]: Holy crap – excuse me for the bluntness, but is this really Tony Stark? Siri doesn’t often get things wrong, especially since I souped her up. But I’m sure you can understand the apprehension. Peter Parker [1:37PM]: Would you be up for answering a few questions just to make sure?

The tip of his finger tapped against the screen impatiently after he hit the send button, his nerves and the not-so-subtle excitement were barely contained under the surface of his skin. He couldn’t remember a time where feeling alive was so prominent.

A smile slipped across his lips when, a moment later, three consecutive texts vibrated Peter’s phone in succession.

Maybe – Tony Stark [1:40PM]: You souped up Siri? Steve Jobs is probably turning over in his grave right now. Maybe – Tony Stark [1:41PM]: I think I’m the one that should be asking the questions, don’t you think? How did you even get this number, Peter Parker? It’s a private line. Maybe – Tony Stark [1:42PM]: I am, though – Tony Stark, I mean.

Peter Parker [1:45PM]: Reconfiguring tech is kind of my thing. I used to dumpster dive in high school – you’d be surprised by the cool pieces of technology people put in their trash. Peter Parker [1:46PM]: Oh, bringing out the big guns – I’m happy to see Siri without my latest addition works for others, too. Peter Parker [1:47PM]: It was an accident, sending those first texts to you. My friend in New York just started a new job that came with a paid phone. I still haven’t saved the number. You are one off from him. Peter Parker [1:48PM]: Alright, Tony Stark. Tell me what campus I’m on.

Maybe – Tony Stark [1:53PM]: I’m not surprised by anything human beings do, especially in New York City. Throwing out a perfectly good iPod is certainly not the weirdest thing I’ve heard of. Did you make anything interesting in your trash conversion adventures? Maybe – Tony Stark [1:54PM]: You talk a big game, Mr. Parker. Can you walk the walk, too? Maybe – Tony Stark [1:55PM]: He must be on my payroll, then. The bank of numbers my employees have come from my personal network. Maybe – Tony Stark [1:57PM]: That’s an easy one. You’re at MIT – Milner was there when I was a student. The only thing that’s probably different between then and now is the amount of hair the old bag has.

Peter Parker [2:01PM]: You’re not wrong, Mr. Stark. I made things that helped me be self-sufficient. I grew up really poor and couldn’t afford the things everyone else had – so I figured out how all the tech worked and made my own. I’ve been using a ten-year-old iPhone for ages. Peter Parker [2:03PM]: You bet. Are you challenging me? Peter Parker [2:04PM]: He is, actually. He started in an entry level position two weeks ago. Peter Parker [2:06PM]: It’s gross, isn’t it? I’m glad we’ve moved past projectors in the classroom – the hair on his hand would make for a distracting shadow. Peter Parker [2:07PM]: Okay, okay. I think I’m convinced. One more test, though – send me a picture.

Maybe – Tony Stark [2:14PM]: Oh boy, none of that Mr. Stark shit. As far as you’re concerned, I’m Tony. Only Tony. Maybe – Tony Stark [2:15PM]: You made your own. That’s – impressive. I’m impressed and more than a little curious. Maybe – Tony Stark [2:17PM]: Challenging you, no. Enticing you, yes. I’m visiting Cambridge to do a guest lecture series next week. Come see what Stark Industries is up to – I’d love to hear what you think. Maybe – Tony Stark [2:18PM]: It was as bad as you think. Maybe – Tony Stark [2:20PM]: Okay, Peter Parker. [IMAGE ATTACHED]

A gasp of shock left Peter’s mouth when he opened the last text to find a smirking Tony Stark looking right at him. To prove the time and date, Tony held up the New York Times, his free hand pointing to the headline Peter read on his phone earlier that morning. After the shock of actually talking to Tony Stark wore off, Peter let himself take in the picture and all of its details.

Tony’s desk was largely visible in the shot – pens and stacks of paper littered the surface, a few rogue pieces of tech ready to be fiddled with acted as paper weights and grungy aesthetic. The man himself was breath taking – his glasses were a deep violet, offset beautifully by the crisp white shirt and black waistcoat covering Tony’s upper body. A light purple tie was loosely knotted at his throat, as if he fiddled with it while working just to keep his hands busy.

Without much thought, Peter saved the photo and added Tony to his contacts before replying – there was no reason not to trust the man, the spark in his shiny hazel eyes seemed to genuine and real to even question.

Peter Parker [2:25PM]: Only Tony, got it. Peter Parker [2:26PM]: Curiosity is good – keeps you fresh and on your toes. Peter Parker [2:27PM]: Oh, I see. You want a chance to impress me. I like that. Not sure what my opinion is going to do for you, but I’ll be happy to share it. Peter Parker [2:29PM]: Gross. Peter Parker [2:30PM]: I’m – you’re… Wow. You really are Tony Stark.

Tony Stark [2:37PM]: I think you’ll have no problems keeping me on my toes, Peter. Tony Stark [2:38PM]: I have a feeling your opinion is one that I’ll be very interested in. You’ve been nothing but blunt this entire conversation, I know I’m getting the real deal stuff. Tony Stark [2:40PM]: I am. I really am Tony Stark. Tony Stark [2:41PM]: It’s your turn, Peter Parker. What face belongs to that beautiful brain of yours?

Forcing himself to breath, Peter looked around the room for the best spot to return the favor. The bed was a hard no, he didn’t want to send the wrong vibe to a person who could easily have whomever they wanted. His desk was small, but meticulously organized – his study materials open and ready for a night of reviewing the only thing obscuring the surface. It was obvious Tony appreciated his brain, it seemed pertinent to take advantage.

After a few attempts, Peter found the perfect angle to catch the light in his eyes, making them shine brightly in the camera. He thanked the clothing gods that he chose a well fitted three-button Henley in his haste to get out the door that morning. The feeling of satisfaction was new, but not unwelcome – he wanted to send Tony the photo; for once, he knew it would impress.

Peter Parker [2:55PM]: Keeping implies longevity. Are you planning on sticking around? Peter Parker [2:56PM]: My brain to mouth filter runs at less than 10% at all times. It has brought me more trouble than shutting up ever would. Peter Parker [2:27PM]: You’re gorgeous. Violet is a nice color on you. Peter Parker [2:29PM]: What do you think? [IMAGE ATTACHED]

Tony Stark [ 2:37PM]: Yes. I think that’s the answer to that question. You’ve presented a puzzle I want to solve. Tony Stark [2:38PM]: Shutting up never got anyone anywhere. The noise we create is what shapes us. Tony Stark [2:40PM]: Thank you – I have a lot of it in my wardrobe. Tony Stark [2:44PM]: & you called me gorgeous; Peter Parker, you’re a stunner.

Peter Parker [2:51PM]: You’re a scientist, you do that for a living. What makes me so different? Peter Parker [2:52PM]: That’s a refreshing opinion. I like the way you think, Only Tony. Peter Parker [2:54PM]: That honestly doesn’t surprise me. Peter Parker [2:55PM]: Do you tell the person who made you blush that you’re blushing? I don’t remember that standard operating procedure.

Tony Stark [3:01PM]: My intrigue is of a personal nature only – the puzzle you pose is of a different sort. Usually, I think and think and think until I solve whatever the problem is. With you, I want to gather all the clues and take it apart piece by piece. Tony Stark [3:02PM]: That’s a little heavy for only knowing each other a couple of hours, but when you know, you know. Tony Stark [3:03PM]: Not usually, but I have a feeling you’re an exception to a lot of things, Peter Parker.

Throughout the rest of the afternoon, Peter continued to exchange flirty text messages back and forth with Tony – the mood stayed open and easy as the time passed. The older man helped Peter get through Nuclear Dynamics and three hours of decathlon practice. For all the brains Tony had, Peter was surprised to find humor and a bit of insecurity, too. Tony let himself go on tangents and make dad jokes that were a step away from being obscene.

That trend continued for the rest of the week and well into the weekend. By the time Sunday afternoon rolled around, Peter knew Tony’s schedule, half the newest late-night discoveries, and the way Mr. Sweet Tooth took his sugary coffee. Though a line of attraction and want existed, Peter was happy to know Tony as a person without the ability to act on the obvious tension between them. And while he appreciated the wholistic way they were coming to know each other, Peter couldn’t wait to see Tony throughout the week, either.

The older man seemed to share his sentiment – the shrill notification of a text message received pulled Peter out of his thoughts.

Tony Stark [7:30PM]: Hey, Pete! I present at 5:30 tomorrow afternoon. Want to grab something to eat afterwards? Tony Stark [7:31PM]: I’m impatient to get back to Hogan’s and thought you might appreciate his culinary prowess.

Peter Parker [7:35PM]: Tony – this is the fourth time you’ve reminded me about your presentation. I’ll be there. For dinner, too. Peter Parker [7:36PM]: Culinary prowess; if it merits that title, I’m sure it’ll be worth it.

Tony Stark [7:42PM]: I know – I just get some performance anxiety. It helps to remind myself that you’re going to be there. Tony Stark [7:43PM]: It is. Hap is an old friend of mine. He left MIT to go make his restaurant dreams happen and has been stupidly happy ever since.

Peter Parker [7:47PM]: I get it – I’ll gladly be your security blanket, Tony. Peter Parker [7:48PM]: Something tells me there’s more to that story, but I’m sure you’ll tell me one day. I’m excited to try it. Should I look up the menu beforehand, or let it be a surprise?

Tony Stark [7:55PM]: I like the sound of that. I’ve pictured having you in my arms often. Tony Stark [7:57PM]: There’s always more to the story, Pete. Let it be a surprise! In fact, I’ll order for you to make sure you get the whole newbie experience.

Peter Parker [8:05PM]: I’ll boldly say you can have me in your arms as often as you like. Peter Parker [8:06PM]: The newbie experience – there hasn’t been a time in my life where that’s been a good thing. Peter Parker [8:07PM]: Yet. Surprisingly – I trust you.

The next day went by quickly – Peter took a quiz in Nuclear Science and dug into his other two classes to keep his mind focused on anything other than Tony’s imminent presence. His last class was a core history class, so he gladly tucked into the reading the professor let them loose to do. The chime of his alarm broke through Peter’s fog a couple pages from the end of his assignment. Though he liked to be ahead, Peter gladly took the extra few minutes to get himself together before heading to MIT’s presentation hall.

Decked out in his finest pair of black jeans, a blue denim short-sleeve button down, and solid black high-top Converse on his feet, Peter walked the few minutes it took to get back onto campus from his small apartment. Unsurprisingly, a line was formed out the door of students hoping to get into the presentation last minute. Tony told him earlier in the week that they waited to advertise his appearance until the a few hours before to stop the masses from flocking. To Peter, the time restriction seemed to only make it worse.

In Tony’s excitement to have Peter there, the older man set aside a ticket for him – instead of joining the line like he might’ve without Tony’s insistence, Peter walked straight into the cool auditorium, snagging a seat at the end of a row located dead center in the auditorium. The vantage point was perfect – Peter wouldn’t have any trouble catching Tony’s eye as he spoke. Grinning at his access to such a simple pleasure, Peter relaxed back into the seat, passing the time until Tony took the stage by watching the crowd flood in around him.

It wasn’t long before the lights were dimming and a sweaty, high ranking alumnus gave Tony Stark a mediocre welcome onto the stage. The crowd broke out into a cheer that more than made up for the old man’s subpar words. Tony timed his entrance perfectly; he walked out as the energy rose, the shift in the crowd’s tension working to enhance everyone’s excitement. Peter found himself glued to the man, who until that moment, existed entirely on the other side of the phone – he didn’t want to miss a single second of full-body absorption.

A black suit coat sat snuggly on Tony’s shoulders, a singular button keeping the sides closed. His dark hair was elegantly styled, the bed-head look enhancing the easy-going style Peter knew Tony strived for. The facial hair Peter came to truly appreciate over the last few days of texting drew attention to his sharp cheekbones. Tony seemed genuinely happy to be there if the beaming smile on his face said anything at all. With a few claps and the corniest joke, the older man got the crowd under control, proceeding onto his speech with an effortless transition.

As expected, Peter found himself interested from the very beginning. Tony’s new work on energy and its uses amongst transportation and city overhaul was ingenious – when things got up and running, New York’s power grid would run completely on sustainable energy. So many thoughts flashed across the front of Peter’s mind – he wondered if Tony would let him take a look at the blueprints. He might not have much to contribute, yet Peter understood the opportunity for learning and development when it presented itself.

By the end of Tony’s presentation, Peter was overjoyed to know that he wouldn’t need to feign interest in the topics Tony brought to the table. For a while, Stark Industries went through a slump of working on weapons and junky tech Peter found in the trash more often than he ever wanted to admit. It felt good to be excited about something new coming from the company – Tony Stark was the smartest person in his field, anything less than almost perfect just didn’t do the man and his ideas justice.

After fielding a lot more questions than Peter expected, Tony headed off the stage with a roar of applause – the genius wasn’t a household name for nothing. Smiling at the thought, Peter pulled his phone out; he got to see behind the curtain more than others – he felt a sudden surge of gratefulness at the fact. Every person around him would do anything for the privilege; taking that for granted just wouldn’t do.

Peter Parker [6:45PM]: You’re an incredible public speaker, Tony. Peter Parker [6:46PM]: Thanks for making me come!

Tony Stark [6:49PM]: How inappropriate of me is it to say that this isn’t the only time I plan to make you come?

Peter Parker [6:55PM]: Very, but it’s appreciated, nonetheless. I’ll meet you over by the Engineering building whenever you’re done trying to outrun your fans.

Tony Stark [7:00PM]: You’re fucking hilarious. I’ll meet you there in five.

True to his word, Tony snuck up behind Peter a few minutes later – soft palms that gave way to well-earned callouses pressed against Peter’s cheeks as Tony covered his eyes. The mere fact that Tony was there at all was surprise enough; the touches and softly whispered “Hello, Pete,” in his ear felt like more than enough to cause a coronary.

Shaking his head to clear it, Peter turned in Tony’s arms, a huge grin playing across his lips. With the way they were standing now, Peter’s chest was pressed delightfully against Tony’s – he felt each and every one of Tony’s inhales of oxygen and exhales of carbon dioxide that brought Peter’s attention to the firm muscles pressing and pulling the man’s abdomen. His breath caught when Tony palmed his cheek, their mouths mere inches apart. Despite not actually knowing each other, Peter felt comfortable in Tony’s embrace.

“Hey, Tony,” Peter finally replied after allowing his breath to mingle with Tony’s. As they stood there pressed together, neither could decipher where one started and the other began. The thought made his grin grow a little wider, the courage inside of him pulsing a little more boldly with life. “You were amazing up there.”

Tony remained perfectly still; his limbs seemingly frozen in a clench to keep Peter close to him. His grip was firm, both the hand on Peter’s hip and his late day stubbled cheek. Like the man himself, Tony’s touch left something behind that kept Peter on the hook, always seeking more. He half expected for Tony to lean in and slot their lips together – his deepest desires and tangible wants were starting to collide in such close proximity.

Instead, Peter’s smile was returned with quirked cheeks and bright hazel eyes. “You weren’t too bored?” Tony asked, his voice soft in the small space between them. His thumb swiped constantly across Peter’s cheek, the obvious need to move apparent, even in such an intimate situation.

Chuckling lightly, Peter shook his head. “So far from bored. My thesis research is all about sustainable energy – you had me interested from the very beginning,” Peter replied almost immediately, not caring that his excitement clearly shone through in the pitch of his voice. The way he was leaning into Tony’s touch, Peter didn’t have much of a chance to disguise his truth, anyway.

“You’re so much smarter than you give yourself credit for – I can tell already.” Tony’s words were mumbled almost as if the older man was embarrassed to say them – to hand out such a compliment to someone other than himself. And yet – Tony’s hesitation made the statement mean so much more; the rarity of such kind words (despite being spoken so softly) did nothing but make Peter want to melt into Tony even further.

Before things could get too mushy or physical, Peter took a large step out of Tony’s arms – begrudgingly, the need for space was prominent if they ever wanted the night to continue. Never mind the fact that paparazzi were constantly hounding and following Tony wherever the man went. Though he was deemed an appropriate companion at the time, Peter was more than sure the public would not agree.

With that thought in mind, Peter shot Tony a shy smile – “I’m pretty famished. Want to show me what Hogan’s is all about?”

They spent the ten-minute walk talking about the presentation – Tony grilled Peter about a few of the technical parts, while Peter drooled a little bit over the projected uses of Tony’s new energy storage and production. Like two nerdy peas in a pod, neither could help themselves – geeking out and talking about something they were both interested in made the rest of the world melt away. Peter might’ve kept on his tangent if it weren’t for a tall, thickly built man clearing his throat.

Looking up at the noise, Peter realized they’d walked a few blocks already and were standing in the lobby of a well-maintained hole in the wall that radiated the most delicious smells. Grease and cheese and freshly dropped French fries hit his senses all at once – there was no doubt that whatever they were about to consume would be more than delicious.

Peter was seconds away from wiping drool from his chin when Tony broke out into action. He took the couple of steps between their current position and the hostess stand to wrap who could only be Happy in a firm, breathtaking hug. “Happy, my man. It’s so good to see you,” Tony exclaimed as he stepped away, an adorable look in his eyes. “I’ve been talking this place up to Peter here, thought I’d cash in on your good will.”

Suddenly, all eyes were on Peter – Tony looked at him like something he couldn’t wait to deconstruct, while Happy tilted his head curiously, as if the one glance would tell him all he needed to know about Peter Parker. Unwillingly to stand there like an animal on display, Peter broke through the weird with a soft laugh and a light wave.

“Nice to meet you, Happy. Tony’s been selling me on your food for days now. I can’t wait to try it,” Peter said, his shoulders rolling back to help him stand a little taller. Though he had nothing to prove to the total stranger in front of him, Peter couldn’t help but want to make a good impression – Happy obviously meant something to Tony; their comradery and easy affection said that without much effort.

There was a moment where all three guys seemed to look between each other – Peter watched with bated breath as Tony and Happy carried on a silent conversation with just a few blinks and forehead crinkles. By the time Peter understood what was happening, Happy stepped a little closer to him, his big hand reaching out for what could only be a handshake. Without hesitating, Peter took it – for whatever reason, the handshake felt monumental; like with the one touch, he beat the level boss and gained access to the next one.

“Good to meet you, too. Tony’s good about that sort of advertisement – we probably wouldn’t have made it without his ugly mug around at the beginning,” Happy replied. “You guys know what you want? I’ll get it on the grill personally.”

At that point, Tony stepped back into the spotlight and grabbed the reins – he ordered everything at rapid fire speed, like the menu existed as a hard copy in Tony’s mind. Considering the warmth of the older man’s welcome and Happy’s cryptic words, Peter didn’t doubt that Tony was a regular – more than likely a founding customer, even.

It took no time at all for their food to come out to the small table in the corner Tony led him to. The tray was piled with an abundance of food – cheese steaks, fries, burgers, even a couple of desserts littered the table as Tony unpacked their haul. Peter’s eyes were wide, his mouth watering with a want that only Zap’s Bodega could illicit before. “This – it all looks amazing,” Peter babbled, his stomach both hungry and overwhelmed by everything in front of him.

“Just wait until you taste it. Happy used to crank out these cheesesteaks on the little hot plate we had in our dorm room. They were excellent, but the addition of the flattop has made them unbeatable.”

Unable to decide what smelled the best, Peter grabbed whatever was nearest to him. His fingers wrapped around the greasy paper of the aforementioned cheesesteak, his mouth watering even more. “So, you and Happy were roommates at MIT?” Peter asked around a large bite, the food in his mouth muffling some of the words. It really was good – worth looking like a pig in front of the most beautiful man alive.

“Hap and I go way back. His father worked security at Stark Industries – he was on my dad’s personal protection team for most of my life. When Happy’s mom died and the need for babysitting became a thing, Happy started to spend the evenings with me after school. In a lot of ways, he’s the only family I’ve ever had. When he first opened up this place, I was young and just looking for some investment that would piss my dad off. I knew Happy had talent, but neither of us thought this place would blow up the way it did.” Tony looked up then, a vulnerability in his eyes. “We’ve been in business together ever since.”

Smiling encouragingly, Peter nodded in Tony’s direction – their closeness, Tony’s unwavering advertisement and protectiveness, even some of the food names he could see on the menu; it all made sense. After taking another bite of the cheesesteak, Peter chewed slowly before responding. “There’s always more to the story, right?” he questioned cheekily. “It sounds like your gamble worked out for you – I didn’t look at the menu, but I did Google Hogan’s; there’s ten locations within a 300-mile radius.”

A snort had Peter looking up, his eyebrows quirked. “I should’ve known,” Tony said through a laugh. “Your generation is all about instant gratification.”

Their eyes locked then, Tony’s words and their meaning sitting in the space between them. Peter forced himself not to blink – he wanted to memorize the rich hazel color that barely ringed a growing pupil. Hunger and want and something unrecognizable existed in Tony’s glance; when it was all over and Tony moved on, Peter desperately wanted to remember the genuine rawness he drew out of one of the world’s greatest minds.

“Or just impatience,” Peter countered. He drew his eyes away, needing to break the glance to stop himself from propelling himself across the table and tackle Tony to the ground. Though it looked as if Happy kept the place spick and span, Peter didn’t want to think about Tony’s expensive suit on any other floor aside from his own.

They attempted to pull the small talk back to something a little tamer, but the road of the rest of the evening had already been paved. It became harder to focus on anything other than the thick press of Tony’s thigh against his own under the table. As the minutes passed, Peter noticed Tony staring, and after a while, the older man just never stopped. Every time he looked up, Peter caught hazel eyes taking him in – undressing him button by button with the sheer want in his eyes. A red blush took up permanent residence on Peter’s cheeks and neck, the color following him out of the restaurant and out onto the street where Tony took his hand without hesitation.

Before his mom passed away, Peter remembered a softly mumbled conversation laying across both his parents early, early in the morning. His dad’s big fingers were wrapped so neatly around his mother’s, the embrace tight, despite the hour. Peter reached out to touch the unbreakable seam, his eyes wide with wonder. “They fit,” Peter whispered softly, his finger running reverently over their joint fingers.

His mother pulled him close then, her lips finding that special place on his cheek. “One day, Petey, you’ll find that perfect person whose hands will fit yours just the way your father’s fit mine.”

A warmth settled in Peter’s chest as he slid his hand into Tony’s, their fingers interlacing perfectly with ease. The immaculate fit of Tony’s hand pressing against his own made him snuggle in further – whatever happened between them after this, Peter would forever know how easily he and Tony Stark fit together.

Giving Tony’s fingers a squeeze at the thought, Peter looked up, breaking the silence – “Do you want to see my apartment? I’m sure it’s not nearly as fancy as the hotel you’re staying at, but I’ve got Netflix and a really comfortable couch.”

Tony took a few long strides to answer, his face a little pensive. “I’d love to see your apartment, Pete,” Tony replied easily. They came to a stop at the crosswalk – Tony used his momentum to pull Peter close to his chest while they waited out the light. “I don’t care about fancy. You’ll be there.”

While Peter had lots of things to reply, his words were cut off by slightly chapped lips eagerly pressing against his own. It took Peter a second to recognize what in the glorious hell was happening – when the reality of the situation finally registered, Peter surged forward, tilting his head to not only return the kiss, but deepen it.

Both of Peter’s hands found their way around Tony’s neck to keep him close – he felt like he might pass out from the sheer goodness of Tony surrounding him without the grounding touch. He was far from a virgin, but none of his previous encounters knocked him off his feet in such a way that made Peter feel like a fumbling newbie.

Sipping from each other’s mouths, Peter was surprised by a strange and unrecognizable voice coming from behind them – “the light’s changed, fellas.”

It took an obscene amount of effort to pull away – though the stranger’s words made his face burn with embarrassment, Peter was reluctant to step out of Tony’s embrace and the tantalizing press of warm lips against his own. Regardless of his trepidation, Peter reluctantly moved back.

He made sure to slip his hand into Tony’s before they set off again.

“I’m just another couple of blocks away,” Peter reassured, a hungry smirk on his face. Tony returned the look, their stride all of the sudden lengthening. Their walk turned from a leisurely stroll to a brisk half-run. If it weren’t for the want raging through Peter’s veins, he might’ve found the change hilarious. In all of their time together, Tony never expressed impatience – he always seemed calm, cool, and collected. Yet, in the face of heat and need and the promise of bare skin, Tony let that mask drop.

Happy to know a new something about Tony, Peter reveled in the pent-up silence that carried them back to his apartment. Snagging a ground floor unit close to the entrance, they luckily didn’t have to wait for an elevator or awkwardly pretend that they weren’t about to push the other against the wall and start ravaging whatever pieces of skin they could find. Instead, Peter impatiently pulled Tony behind him as they walked between building 1 and 2 with eager steps.

After some fumbling and a set of dropped keys, Peter finally got his door open and Tony through it. Without missing a beat, Tony pushed him back against the newly closed front door, their lips harshly joining. Groaning at the contact and suddenness of it all, Peter pulled Tony in – any space left between them was unacceptable now that they were in a private space where wandering eyes and clicking cameras couldn’t see. Their obvious passion was too much for the public eye; Peter so desperately wanted to keep Tony to himself – devouring him in a safe space was only the first step.

As Tony traced his bottom lip with the tip of his tongue, Peter fumbled his hands down the older man’s chest until he could pull the crisp button-down from well-tailored pants. The second he was able, Peter shoved his hands under the soft fabric, his palms greedily pressing into Tony’s hairy chest. A groan left his mouth – the chest hair under his fingers was soft and teasing. Peter was caught between the urge to tug at the strands and lay his head gently against them just to feel the texture against his skin.

Tony made the decision for him – large hands were suddenly on Peter’s waist, his feet coming up off the ground with little effort. Unable to keep his hands where they were, Peter broke the kiss with a groan and shifted until he could wrap his legs around Tony’s hips. Peter panted for breath while his lips were still free as Tony navigated through the room blindly. Another soft moan left Peter’s lips when his back hit the pliable leather of his couch.

Where just moments before they were standing chest to chest, Peter now had the full weight of Tony against him. The older man fit seamlessly between his splayed thighs, their hips lining up in a way that made Peter’s cock pulse against the confines of his tight jeans. With a bit of shifting, their groins were matched – Tony’s thick cock felt sinful against Peter’s. If his impending orgasm was already upon him, Peter wondered what it’d be like when their clothes hit the floor and he really got to taste what Tony had to offer.

Like he was reading his mind, Tony made quick work of the buttons on Peter’s shirt. Calloused hands dragged up and down Peter’s bare chest as he pushed the navy fabric to the side – his skin was practically hairless, the only exception being a small trail of it leading down to the v of his jeans. Tony let his fingers play through that small amount of hair, his fingers teasing as they got closer to the one spot that Peter wanted him to be the most.

Deciding to take his mind off of the heat in his belly and the closeness of his orgasm, Peter returned the favor. His hands were shaky as he passed button after button through their holes. With a gasp, Peter spread the sides of Tony’s shirt to get the maximum impact of the older man’s torso. He liked what he felt before, but the view was something else – Tony’s chest was chiseled and cut, his pecs and abs straining with effort. Peter noticed throbbing veins and a few scars in his perusal; the evidence of Tony’s life and the way he lived it made Peter pull the man a little closer. Tony Stark drove him absolutely mad – every new thing he learned contributed to the insanity even more.

Before he could get lost in the thought, Tony’s lips were skating along his cheek, only to stop and caress the outer shell of Peter’s ear. “You feel amazing, Pete,” Tony babbled, his tongue peeking out to join in on the fun. “I want to taste you, feel your cock pulse against my tongue. You’re so fucking hard and I can’t fucking wait. Is that okay?”

Peter pulled back then, a soft grin pulling at his lips. In all of his sexual encounters, Peter couldn’t recall someone caring about him so thoroughly, let alone stopping to ask how he felt. Both hands came up to grip Tony’s cheeks until the older man was looking right at him. Through the haze of arousal, Peter recognized that warm spark in Tony’s eye – it was the look in that first picture that kept Peter coming back for more.

“It’s perfect, Tony. I’ll take anything you want to give me,” Peter said breathlessly. He leaned up for a kiss to drive the words home.

Tony looked genuinely happy when Peter pulled away – his cheeks were flushed with obvious arousal, his lips quirked in a saucy smile. Without saying anything, Tony nodded his head and travelled slowly down the length of Peter’s body. Nimble fingers made quick work of the button and zipper of his jeans before Peter could think or even draw his next breath.

Sturdy hands didn’t hesitate to pull at the waistband of Peter’s boxers – his flushed cock was already leaking as it came to rest casually against the firm abs of Peter’s chest. Tony’s calloused fingers immediately wrapped around the length, giving a tight squeeze to the base. The sheer feeling of his crush’s hands on him was almost enough for Peter to jump straight over the edge. Catching Tony’s eyes and biting down on his bottom lip was his only saving grace – the knowing look in beautiful hazel eyes pulled a chuckle from Peter’s chest, the noise distraction enough.

“Okay?” Tony asked again, the words were spoken with his mouth hovering just inches from the pulsing flesh of Peter’s cock. He could feel Tony’s breath against his sensitive skin, everything about the situation making it hard to articulate or think or exist as anything other than a melted puddle of goo against broken-in leather.

Peter took a couple of deep breaths before nodding vigorously. He felt a red flush travel even further down his neck and torso, arousal and embarrassment mixing together to create the ultimate aphrodisiac. He finally found his voice, muttering a choked off “yes” before the motor function of speaking left him once more.

After a heartbeat and then another where neither man moved, Tony gripped the sharp bones of Peter’s hips, pushing his lower body down against the cushions. They shared another look as Tony lowered his head, his pink tongue poking out to lick lightly against the leaky head of Peter’s cock. Hazel eyes stayed on him – Tony continued to lap along his sensitive skin, all while killing Peter slowly with the heat and want reflecting back. By the time Tony had all of Peter in his mouth, Peter was seconds away from being undone.

It’d been so long, and he’d wanted Tony since he understood what attraction was. Being pinned down by the person he desired longer than some of his friendships did nothing but magnify everything that was happening. His skin felt like it was on fire under Tony’s touch – the suction around his cock felt like it was coming from all angles, everywhere, all at once. Unable to stop himself, Peter moaned, panted, and shamelessly shouted Tony’s name as the blissful seconds passed.

The telling zip of a zipper being pushed down, and Tony’s hasty shift told Peter that Tony was similarly affected. He picked up his head to watch Tony suck his cock down while his right hand moved at the same pace – while he took Peter’s cock into his throat, Tony was stroking his own erection with sure strokes. As if the heat around him wasn’t enough, the beautiful visual of Tony taking his own pleasure pushed him those last couple of steps over the edge.

Bubbling heat in his belly boiled over. Peter frantically reached down to grip Tony’s shoulder, his mouth wordlessly shaping around warning words. “I’m – I’m… fuck, Tony. I’m going to cum,” Peter finally managed to gasp out. There was just enough time for Tony to pull away, to let Peter’s pleasure splatter on the blood warm skin of Peter’s stomach. Yet, Tony held fast, instead – he redoubled his efforts, his lips tightening and throat relaxing in invitation.

Unable to stop himself, Peter let go – his hips thrust up into Tony’s enticing heat, the man’s name dripping from his lips as pulse after pulse of cum left his body. Tony moaned around him, swallowing easily without pulling his mouth away or stopping his ministrations. The suction continued until Peter was reaching down halfheartedly to push at Tony’s soft curls.

While he caught his breath, Tony crawled up Peter’s body, a self-satisfied smirk on his red cheeks. Peter grinned at him, happiness and satiation rolling off of him in waves. Without thought, Peter pulled Tony tightly to him, their lips finding each other like opposite poles of magnets drawn together by the sheer force of nature. Tony shared Peter’s taste with him, his talented tongue thrusting into Peter’s mouth with a shared groan between them. It was all so hot; Peter felt his spent cock already starting to come back to life.

With that thought in mind, Peter started to reach down to help Tony finish achieving his own pleasure; yet his hand was batted away with affectionate finesse. Peter shifted until he could meet the honey hazels he was already addicted to, a question in his eye.

“There’s no need,” Tony mumbled, his face tucking into the skin of Peter’s neck. “You’re so sexy, I couldn’t help but touch myself. The way you look in the throes of pleasure – it’s unlike anything I’ve ever seen before.”

“Holy shit.”

Tony chuckled at the awe in Peter’s voice. “My sentiment exactly.”

For a while, they stayed stretched out on Peter’ couch, exchanging kisses and greedy touches on all the bare skin either could reach. Without so much adrenaline coursing through his system, Peter felt himself melting even further into the comfy cushions below him. After a jaw breaking yawn, Peter reached up to cup Tony’s cheek, pulling the man’s attention towards him.

“Want to stay over?” Peter asked quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. Though they were spent and wrapped up in each other, Peter wasn’t sure where Tony stood. There was a big difference between the type of intimacy physical touch and sleeping next to another human being required. The last few days, Peter fell asleep with Tony’s messages open on the bed next to him – actually sleeping side by side, in person, that was a whole new step for them.

Tilting his head to the side, Tony shot Peter a tender smile before nodding and leaning down to press their lips together.

“Yeah, Pete – I want to stay.”

[silenceofthecookies]

Gin Ichimaru x reader(F) - perspective

Okay so, story time, several years ago I promised @nakunakunomi​ I’d write her a Gin fanfic for her birthday. Time passed, I started writing in character, and I found out Gin is ridiculously hard to write for. I’ve started about 4 stories, all of which I ended up deleting because they didn’t fit Gin well enough to my liking. About 4 hours ago I got this idea, and I’ve been writing it non-stop since to just finish and publish this before I decided it was no good as well and deleted this as well.

Hazel, I am so sorry this took so long, I hope you like it! 

Word count: 3344 Warnings: none

A young man had entered the castle. A commoner. Apparently he had helped out some soldiers capture an enemy spy. There was a war going on with the neighbouring country, and the situation had been tense lately. Spies were not uncommon, though they were hard to catch. This man had not only discovered one, he had also worked with the soldiers to apprehend the spy. The soldiers took him to the king so he could receive a reward for his deeds.

The man was long and slender, certainly not the kind of man you’d think of when you thought of a man who captured an enemy spy. If anything, he was exactly the kind of person you’d think of when imagining an enemy spy. His white hair hung partly over his face, hiding his eyes just a little from sight. But that was not what unnerved you about this man. It was the man’s smile. It was an eerie, long, stretched smile that almost made it seem like he was guarding a secret he would soon reveal. One that would lead to very negative consequences. You did not take your eyes off the man for as long as he was in the throne room.

Against your expectations, he did nothing that would worry you. The man simply accepted the reward from the king for his services and left. Your father had offered him to join the army, saying that surely with his abilities and intelligence he would quickly rise up the ranks, but the man had declined, saying that the life of a soldier was not one suited for him. You were glad when he was gone and let out a breath you were not aware you had been holding. The king laughed at your reaction, having been aware of your caution from the start, and warned you that men could not be judged on looks. You agreed with him and quickly composed yourself before the next person entered the throne room.

After the audiences were done, you went to the library to read a book while you waited for dinnertime. One of your personal maids, Rangiku, went with you.

“Shall I bring your tea to the library, your highness? Or will you be reading in your room?” “In the library is fine, thank you, Rangiku.”

The young woman bowed and left your side to go to the kitchen. You entered the library and took the same book you had been reading for a few days now. It was a romance novel. The protagonist was the daughter and second child of a merchant. Though she was not extremely wealthy, she was smart and beautiful, and she attracted many suitors from higher standing, who offered her father financial support for his company in return for his daughters hand in marriage. Her father refused them all, saying his daughter would marry out of love. After many hardships, she fell in love with a blacksmith’s assistant. He had little to no money to his name, but he was kind, respectful and romantic, and they were going to get married.

The thought seemed almost absurd to you. Didn’t commoners live a very hard life? Why would she turn down all those well-off suitors to go live with a blacksmiths boy? As she was the second child, her father’s company would go to her older brother. Why not marry a well-off man and live comfortably? It confused you so, that you decided to ask Rangiku about it when she arrived with your tea.

“Excuse me, your highness?” she asked, a little shocked as she heard your question. “I asked if it was hard living as a commoner. You once told me you were an orphan and you lived on the street for a while, right?” “That’s true but… your highness, if I might ask, where does this sudden question come from?”

You explained the story you were reading to her, and Rangiku’s eyes softened.

“To answer your question, yes, it was hard. However, it was not all bad. I lived together with another group of orphans. Sure, living wasn’t easy, but we were happy together. Having the right people around you can bring you more happiness than money ever could.” “I see… if they made you so happy, Rangiku, don’t you miss them now you work here?” “Of course I do, your highness. But I visit them regularly on my days off.” “I see… what are they like?”

Rangiku happily told you about the people she grew up with, people who were all like brothers and sisters to her. There were two people who she spoke of more than others though. They were Gin and Toshiro, her older and younger brother respectively. According to Rangiku Gin had a weird sense of humour, but he was very reliable. Toshiro on the other hand was way too serious, but he was always thinking about others. Seeing her face light up as she spoke about her little makeshift family made you think that maybe, the book that now lied neglected on the couch next to you was not just pretty words.

“They all sound so wonderful.” You told Rangiku as she finished talking. “They really are.” She agreed with a gentle smile on her face. “Do you think I could meet them?” you asked carefully, in a small voice. “Of course! If that is your highnesses’ wish, you could invite them here at any time, I’m sure they’d be honoured to-“ “Actually, I’d rather meet them at their home. And maybe without them knowing I’m the princess. I feel like… I don’t know… it would give me a better understanding of commoners and their life? Listening to you just made me realise that I have no idea how commoners live… but this country will be mine to rule one day…”

Rangiku’s eyes widened in surprise before an excited smile appeared on her face.

“Your highness, that is a fantastic idea! In that case, how about I bring you with me on my next day off? We’ll put you in one of the maid’s dresses and tell them that you’re another maid who grew up in the castle.” “Would that really be alright?” “Of course!”

You and Rangiku worked out all the details, how to sneak you out, how to make sure nobody would realise you were gone,… and then agreed that next Sunday, you’d head to the kitchen after breakfast and that you’d leave with Rangiku.

---

You adjusted the hood of your cloak as you walked through the gates of the castle. As the princess of this country, you had never been allowed to leave the castle without a guard and yet here you were, leaving the castle with a maid. You briefly wondered if this truly was a good idea, wondering what the consequences would be for both you and Rangiku in case you got caught, but these thoughts were soon banished from your mind when you came across a market in the castle town. Rangiku bought a pie from the baker. The baker happily chatted with Rangiku as she did so, and from their conversation it was clear that Rangiku did this every time she went home. After a while of walking, the two of you left the walls of the castle town and walked in between the fields that surrounded it. There were a lot of farmers out on the fields, watering their crops and milking their cows. Most of them waved at Rangiku as she passed by, and Rangiku happily waved back. Several of them yelled ‘good morning’ and ‘have a safe trip’ as well from across their fields, and the happy atmosphere caught hold of you. You had always thought that commoners were unhappy because they did not have a lot of money, but perhaps Rangiku was right. Maybe happiness required the right people around you instead of a lot of money.

Not too long after the two of you left the castle walls, a small house came into sight. It looked a bit old and worn-out and it was clear that there had been work done to patch it up here and there. In fact, as you approached, you noticed a small figure sitting on the roof, attaching a few new planks to the roof.

“Toshiro!” Rangiku called out. The young man jumped at the sound a little and turned around. You immediately recognised the name. “Welcome back Rangiku. I’ll be down after I’ve fixed this. There’s a small leak in the roof.” “Take your time~” “Who’s that with you?” “This is Shiori, we work together at the castle.”

You resisted the urge to curtsy at the introduction. Shiori had been the name you to picked to cover up your identity, but Shiori was an attendant of the princess, not the princess herself.

“Nice to meet you, Shiori, I’m Toshiro.” The young man showed a small smile as he addressed you. “Nice to meet you, Toshiro.” You answered with a smile of your own. “Toshiro! Where is Gin?” Rangiku asked once introductions were over. “He’s out helping the old man next door with milking the cows, his son is sick. He should be back any time now.” “Alright~ Come in, Shiori, I’ll make us some time. Toshiro, come down soon too, I’ve got pie~”

Toshiro did not reply, instead the sound of hammering was soon heard again. Once you entered the house, it sounded extra loud, but you would bear it for a little. For now though, you were more distracted by the interior of the house. You had never been in a commoner’s house before. Everything was dark because the windows were small, there was very little furniture, and most of what was visible seemed older than you. It was truly a culture shock. Rangiku started boiling a big pot of tea.

“It’s not much, but make yourself at home. I’ll prepare some tea and cut the pie already.”

You somewhat carefully sat down on a chair, wondering if it would give out under your weight. It didn’t take long for Toshiro to come back in. Rangiku put down cups of tea and handed out plates with pie, both were made of simply, unpainted clay. They were very different from the cups and plates you had back in the castle.

As you were enjoying the refreshments, you found out that most of the people Rangiku had mentioned no longer lived with them. Most had taken up trades and were living with their masters. Some others had moved town, hoping to find happiness somewhere else. Only Gin and Toshiro had remained in the house. They made a living by tending to a patch of land that as attached to their house and by helping the farmer, who was also their landlord.

Just when you were starting to relax and enjoy the company, a fourth person entered the small home. As you looked up, your heart sank. It was the man you had seen at the castle, the one with the unnerving smile. Certainly he would recognise you. His eyes lingered a second on you before he turned to Rangiku, his smile never wavering.

“Rangiku, who did you bring with you?” “This is Shiori, she works at the castle too. I talk about you two all the time so she wanted to come with me. Shiori, this is Gin.” “Nice to meet you” Your voice came out shaky, partially because of the fear of being recognised, partially because of his face. “Nice to meet you, Shiori. Oh by the way, Rangiku, did you know I went by the castle last week?” “What? No way! And you didn’t come say hi to me?!”

As Rangiku got the details from Gin about his business in the castle, you let out a shaky breath. Did he not recognise you? Certainly not, otherwise he would have treated you differently, right? This was good, your cover was safe.

“Wait, Gin, you refused the king’s offer to join the army despite him offering you a higher position from the start?!” “Yeah.” “Are you mad?! Those guys earn good money!” “Aw come on, Rangiku. Then Toshiro would’ve been lonely.” “I would definitely be happier without you around!” Toshiro yelled. He had been silent ever since Gin had entered and he had seemed more tense too. “Of course he would have been! Then he and Momo could’ve lived here together~!” Rangiku quipped in. “Wha-?! Rangiku!” Toshiro yelled, a light pink dusting his cheeks. Rangiku and Gin laughed. “Yeah, maybe I should have thought about that earlier~” Gin joked. “As if, you just don’t want to work for the king because you hate that guys guts, right?” Toshiro asked. “Toshiro!” Rangiku lightly slapped his arm. “What?! I know you work in the castle, but that’s not changing the situation!” Toshiro yelled.

You looked in confusion between the three. Your father was a beloved king, right? Why did they act this way? Rangiku noticed and immediately tried to steer away from the subject.

“Oh I’m so sorry you have to see this, Shiori. Toshiro, Gin, we have a guest. Let’s not do this now.” She said. “Oh come on, Rangiku. Certainly she’s just as fed-up with the king as we are. Aren’t you, Shiori?” Gin asked, his attention, and grin, now directed at you. “I…I think he’s a fair king.” You said. “Let me guess, you were born in the castle?” “Yes…I was. What does that have to do with it?” “It means you lack perspective. The king wanted more power, so he started a war with the neighbouring country. To pay for said war, he’s raising taxes.” “Yes, but when he wins the spoils from the war will certainly be plentiful.” “When? You’re naïve, aren’t you? If. If he wins. And on top of that, those spoils will go into his pocket, not ours. And then we’re not even talking about the people who have died fighting this stupid war. Do you know how many have already died? How many more need to die for that bastard to fill his pockets? The king is a greedy son of a bitch, that’s what he is.” Gin spoke calmly, as if reading a line from a book. And yet, there was something menacing about his tone. There was a certain edge to it. One that made you very nervous. “I…I think the king is doing what he thinks is best for the kingdom.” “By killing his people and robbing them blind with taxes?” “I… I cannot deny that that’s happening, but I truly believe the king means well. Maybe… he’s lacking perspective.”

Gin’s grin grew and Rangiku was about to get up and drag you away before Gin got up and got closer to you.

“Let’s say you’re right. He’s still doing bad stuff. He only has people advising him who will also fill their pockets after the war. His perspective will never expand. He has no-one around who has the guts to point out his mistakes.” “The why don’t you join the army and become that person?” “Because the moment I speak up, I will be branded a rebel and executed, that’s why. Life is not that fair, young lady. Usually when you point out mistakes to nobles and royals, they’ll have you hung.”

Your head dropped. He was right, whenever someone was rude to a royal, said royal needed but say the word and the offender was executed. Nobles had the same power to a certain extent. In the past, it has been used to repress rebellions by your ancestors. And you had never thought anything of it, you had seen it as normal.

“Gin! That’s enough!” Rangiku huffed, pushing Gin out of your face. “Aww don’t be so serious, Rangiku. I was only playing teasing her~” “You were harassing her, Gin.” “Oh, was I? I’m sorry, Shiori~”

His apology was light-hearted and sounded as a joke. As if he did something funny. Rangiku continued to scold him for a little longer, before stepping back and grabbing your cloaks.

“I think we should leave, Shiori. I’m sorry about my brother.” “It’s alright, Rangiku. He… he had a point.” Rangiku stared at you in shock as you put your cloak on. “Despite the topic just now, I had fun while I was here. Would it be alright if I came with you more often?” “O-of course. If that’s what you want…”

You thanked Toshiro and Gin for their hospitality and left their home, Rangiku following behind you in a daze. The sound of the door closing behind her seemed to snap her out of it, and she quickly ran up to walk besides you.

“Your highness, I am so sorry for Gin’s behaviour. He was out of line, talking about your father like that.” “No, Rangiku, he wasn’t. He voiced his a opinion. Gave me a perspective I never even thought about. As the future queen of this country, I need to hear things like this. The rich are only a small portion of this country, yet it’s the only view I know. Sure, it hurt to hear him speak about my father like that… but I want to be a good queen. I want to make the people happy. All of them, not just the rich. I can’t keep walking with my eyes shielded from the ugly truth.”

Rangiku was unsure of what to say to you as she continued walking besides you on your way back to the castle. Unknown to you, Gin, who had been listening to the conversation from next to a window that was open, grinned and walked back to the kitchen, where Toshiro was still drinking his tea.

---

Your little escapade had gone by without a problem. Nobody every knew you were gone, so nobody got in trouble. That had been a few days ago now, but Gin’s words were still etched into your mind. You pondered over them as you read several books about history and politics, trying to think about them from a commoners perspective as much as you could, the romance novel you were reading long forgotten.

You tucked the books you wanted to read under your arm, ready to bring them to your room with you to enjoy them in the safety of your room. As you walked though a hallway, a man in light armour walked by. It wasn’t uncommon, as the strategy room was close to the library. What was uncommon though, was the man’s white hair. As you got closer, you realised exactly who that was.

“Gin?” you gasped. “Good evening, your highness. Or can I call you Shiori? Wait, your real name was Y/N, right? Can’t I just call you that? I do hate formalities, certainly when you’ve visited my house already.” “I- Wha- You knew?” “Oh yes, all along. You’re not very subtle, you know that?” “But, I thought you hated my father? Did you change your mind?” “Oh no, not at all. I still can’t stand the guy. But I heard the princess needed to hear the opinions of the commoners.” “You overheard that?!” “The walls of our house aren’t nearly as thick as the castle walls, my lady.” “So… you came here to help me?” “I had three reasons for doing this. That is one of them.” “What are the other two?” “Easy. Toshiro has a girlfriend and I’m pretty sure he wants to marry her, but as long as I live at home nothing is going to happen.” “And the last?” “Oh, the third reason?”

Gin stepped closer to you, which in turn made you step back. You continued retreating as he kept advancing until your back was against the wall. He stared at you, that unnerving smile of his present as always.

“Because you caught my eye, Y/N.”

Your eyes widened and you felt your cheeks heat up. Before you could even process the words, Gin was already continuing down the hallway.

“Anyway, I have a meeting with the king. Have a nice day, your highness~”

[aster-ion]

Sylvie x Loki Might Not Happen and Here’s Why

***SPOILERS FOR LOKI TV SHOW***

1.  They are basically siblings

Even though they have different personalities, backstories, and physical appearances, that doesn't change the fact that they are the genetic equivalent of siblings. No matter what Timeline you're looking at, both Sylvie and Loki are the offspring of Laufey and whoever he had children with. We know this because they are Variants of the exact same person, meaning that if either of them were born to someone other than Laufey, they would have been pruned as a baby. And since they weren't, that means they must be just as genetically similar as siblings are.

Because of this, the idea of Sylvie and Loki engaging in any kind of romantic or sexual relationship is extremely disturbing to a lot of fans. It's too big an oversight to brush past, especially when the show has continued to remind us over and over that they are, in fact, both Lokis. Maybe if them being the same person wasn't such a major plot point, it would be easier to ignore the facts, but it is, and that means that Marvel is basically pushing either an incest or selfcest (depending on how you look at it) type relationship. And that’s extremely risque for a corporation as large as Marvel, especially with a character as beloved by fans as Loki. 

2.  It is terrible LGBTQ+ representation

And before anyone says anything, no, it is not because Sylvie is portrayed as female and Loki as male. I've seen a lot of Sylvie x Loki shippers say that the reason people don't like the couple is due to it being one between a male and female, but that's not true. Loki and Sylvie were both confirmed to be bisexual, meaning that they can engage in a relationship with anyone of any gender. It would be completely valid for either of them to pursue romance with someone of a different sex and still be bisexual. No one is arguing against that, and if they are, I definitely do not agree with them.

However, the problem comes in when you take into account Marvel and Disney's (who owns Marvel) long history of queerbaiting. There have been countless times that Disney advertises their "first gay character!" only for it to be a single line of dialogue or a brief shot. Marvel in particular has used the popularity of certain LGBTQ+ ships and headcanons in their fanbase to generate media popularity that they don't actually follow through with in their movies/shows. So when Loki was confirmed to be both genderfluid and bisexual in Episode Three, lots of people felt like they were finally getting a win for representation. 

But those people, myself included, appear to have been let down again. The first two official queer characters had so much potential to go off and be with anyone they wanted, but instead, the show has set them up to be in a romance with each other. Now, this wouldn't be problematic on it's own, but when you take into consideration the questionable nature of their romance from Point One as well as the fact that the show has explicitly referred to it as "twisted," it raises the question of whether or not this is actually good representation. Because the fact is, in one episode the writers went “look, it’s two queer people!” and in the next, they said “their relationship is disgusting and demented.” Marvel’s first bisexual characters being borderline incestuous/selfcestuous does not sit well with me at all.

All of this is made even more confusing when you take into account the background of the Loki crew, most notably, the director Kate Herron. She also directed the Netflix series Sex Education, which has quite a bit of very well done representation of all kinds. So how is she managing to fail so badly on this project? It makes me wonder whether she truly is just losing her touch or if this is all a misdirection. Personally, I'm hoping for the latter.

3.  It does not send the "self love" message people seem to think it does

The writers, director, and cast of Loki have said multiple times that the relationship between Sylvie and Loki is meant to act as a metaphor for self love. And in a way, that makes a lot of sense. Despite creating different identities for themselves over time, they are still ultimately the same person and therefore share a special bond because of it. And there's a lot of potential that can be done with that concept.

Loki is an extremely complex and intriguing character. He has experienced a lot of trauma in his past that has shaped him into the person he is today. And that person is clearly very broken. He has never given away or received any kind of love, with the exception of his mother and possibly his brother, Thor. Other than that, he's had no healthy friendships, romances, or perception of himself. It makes sense for him to be confused by this pull he feels towards Sylvie, who is both alarmingly alike and vastly different from himself.

Something this series does exceptionally well is breaking Loki out of his comfort zone. He is finally forced to see himself from other people's perspectives. It started with the file Mobius showed him in the first episode. Loki was able to view his actions apart from himself, and was hit with the realisation that he had been hurting people, and he didn't like that. 

Loki is also confronted by the existence of the Time Keepers and the TVA, who describe him as an antagonist and nothing more. To them, his role is to make those around him look better, even if that means he repeatedly gets the short end of the stick. Mobius mentions that he disagrees with this and that Loki "can be whoever and whatever he wants, even someone good," adding another layer of depth as to who Loki could be in the future of the series. 

Another huge moment for Loki's character development is while in the Time Loop Prison with Sif. Though he starts out annoyed with the situation and recalls not feeling apologetic when he cut off Sif's hair, the longer he is in the loop, the more he changes. Loki admits things to himself that we have never seen him say aloud, such as the fact that he is a narcissist that craves attention. Sif telling Loki over and over that he deserves to be alone makes Loki question whether or not he believes that to be true, allowing him an introspective moment where he really has to think about who he is. 

Now with all of that being said, I'd like to tie in why this is important to the writing of Loki and Sylvie. They act as a mirror to one another, representing both the flaws and strengths of "what makes a Loki a Loki." For once, Loki gets an honest, unbiased look at himself without layers of expectations or self doubt. On Lamentis, he calls Sylvie "amazing" and praises her for all her accomplishments. That's a huge moment for him because it shows that despite also finding her irritating, he can look past those traits and see someone worth being a hero underneath. And through that realisation, he begins to understand that he can also grow to love himself. That kind of character development for Loki is incredible to watch, and it's the kind of character development I want to see from this series. Unfortunately, them possibly engaging in a romantic relationship will ruin it.

Whenever I'm feeling insecure about myself and my abilities, the solution has never been to look at who I am through a romantic lens. Self love is an entirely different type of love from romantic love, so if the series tries to push this relationship as a romance, it will fail to truly represent the arc that they are trying to show.

4.  Nobody likes it 

This one's a little on the nose, but it's true. Almost no one likes this ship, and more than that, most people actively hate it. Yes, there is a small minority that like Loki and Sylvie together, but there is an overwhelmingly larger group that is disgusted and angry by the fact that the show paired them up.

After Episode 4 aired, I ranted for about an hour and a half with a friend about how much we didn't want them together. My aunt whom I have never texted reached out to me to say that she hated their relationship. My homophobic neighbour came over and told me that she would prefer any other romance to this. Friends that I haven't talked to much since school let out for summer have all agreed that they collectively dislike Loki x Sylvie. This ship has brought people together purely because everyone hates it more than they hate each other.

There is no denying that the general feedback for Loki and Sylvie being a couple has been negative, even if you support them getting together for some reason. So if there are so many people out there who don't like it, I'm confused as to how it would be approved by a team of professionals.

5.  The contradicting information we have gotten so far

Before the release of Episode Four, Kate Herron said that the relationship between Loki and Sylvie was “not necessarily romantic.” During the interview, she continued to refer to them as friends and people who found solace and trust in each other.

However, after Episode Four, the head writer, Michael Waldron, and other members of the crew spoke up about Sylvie and Loki. They said things like “it just felt right that that would be Loki’s first real love story” and “these are two beings of pure chaos that are the same person falling in love with one another.” These kinds of comments very heavily imply something romantic, directly contradicting what Kate Herron said. Even Tom Hiddleston, the actor for Loki, has assessed the situation, highlighting the differing viewpoints. He’s also said before that the end of Episode Four ultimately has Loki getting in his own way. 

Now, this could all just be a misdirection on either side to build suspense for the show, but as of right now, it is entirely unclear who is telling the truth. Though it is more likely that the statements made by Michael Waldron are more accurate (as he is the writer), there is still a slight possibility that Loki x Sylvie won’t happen. I’ll link the articles I’ve found on this topic below so you can read them and decide for yourself. 

Kate Herron Statement - https://www.cbr.com/loki-sylvie-relationship-not-romantic/ 

Michael Waldron Statement - https://www.marvel.com/articles/tv-shows/loki-sylvie-in-love 

Tom Hiddleston Statement - https://thedirect.com/article/loki-tom-hiddleston-sylvie-romance 

6.  It is still salvageable

The odds are not in our favour, I’m afraid. It is highly probable that the show will put Loki and Sylvie in a romantic relationship with each other. Yet there is still a way to salvage it and turn their bond into something incredibly satisfying. Like I mentioned in Point Three, the relationship between Loki and Sylvie has the potential to be incredibly empowering and provide both characters some much-needed growth. And I believe that while unlikely, it can still do that. 

The only mention of them being romantically interested in each other came from Mobius, who at the time was angry, betrayed, and doing anything he could to get Loki to talk. Then, at the end of the episode, right before Loki is about to confess something important to Sylvie, he is pruned. This results in no explicit confirmation from either Loki or Sylvie that they are in love with each other. The audience is left not knowing whether Mobius was correct in his speculations, and honestly, I don’t think Loki knows either.

Loki is no expert on love, as I explained earlier. It is entirely possible that he doesn’t grasp how he feels about Sylvie and defaults to romance because of what Mobius said. There is undoubtedly some sort of deep bond forming between them, and I would love to see that being explored in the next two episodes. I would love to watch Loki’s journey of realising that he doesn’t want anything romantic with Sylvie, and was simply confused by the new things he was feeling towards her. Loki even says “this is new for me” when talking to Sylvie at the end of Episode Four. Him momentarily believing that he wants to be a couple with her then shifting into them becoming friends who help each other grow is still a reality that could happen. And ultimately, I think that would benefit them both as characters as well as strengthen the overall message of the show.

In a show about self love, acceptance of yourself, and figuring out who you want to be, Loki very much needs people who support him. He has that in Mobius already, and now he’s beginning to have it in Sylvie as well. I just hope that it is done in a way that resonates with the audience and subverts expectations, which just cannot be done through some twisted romantic relationship. I’ve spoken to others watching the show and seen people talking online, and everyone seems to agree that Loki and Sylvie work much better as platonic soulmates or found family than a couple. 

Of course, my hopes aren’t that high up. While I’d love for this to happen, I’ve been let down by Marvel before and wouldn’t be surprised if they went for the easy route of pairing characters up rather than dealing with the emotions correctly. Still, I have hope for this series. Everything else about it is wonderful and perfect in every way. It has the potential to become a masterpiece and easily the best thing that Marvel has ever done. However, this romance would ruin it for me and so many others. We already feel incredibly disappointed by Loki x Sylvie being suggested, so I can’t even begin to fathom how people will react if the show makes it canon. I’m begging Marvel to please do better than this. They have a wonderful story to tell and a wonderful team to do it, and I hope from the bottom of my heart that they don’t throw that away. 

[carmenxjulia]

I put together a transcript of the 2 hour Q&A Interview the Carmen Sandiego Discord did with Showrunner Duane Capizzi. All of the questions were submitted by server members. You can read everything below the break!

Duane Capizzi:

Hi there!

Am I in? Is this thing on?

PizzaHorse:

Hi, welcome!

Yep, you're in the right place!

Duane Capizzi:

Sorry I'm late, I was wandering around some empty Discord hallways looking for the right room haha

PizzaHorse:

No worries. Let's get started!

Who is your favorite character?

Duane Capizzi:

Moose Boy!

KIDDING!

Alright, how to NOT get myself in trouble if my answer isn't "Carmen" haha.

But really, they are ALL my babies.

So I know it's going to sound like a cop out to some that I can't pick just one. But hmm, some for instances...

I love that she's so morally evolved at such a young age; her ability to always take the high road and never lower herself; her drive and conviction and dedication. Her ability to kick serious booty and look good while doing it. Her progressive values, her fashion sense. I could go on and on. But then there's Shadowsan and his arc; Chase and his. Julia, who's every bit as strong as Carmen but shows it in different ways. The Cleaners don't get enough love.

I'll close that question with an anecdote about The Cleaners ...

I love that all our characters are embraced and that everyone seems to have favorites. Our sound engineer Marcel is a pretty serious guy: he has a serious job that takes high levels of focus and attention. He's always deeply focused and not prone to small talk. Anyway, we were in the middle of our first or second sound mix, and he suddenly stops in the middle and turns around to face us. I'm thinking, "uh oh, we're giving too many notes." That's when I notice he's freeze framed the Cleaners. He says "I really like these guys." Then he turns around, hits play and gets back to work.

PizzaHorse:

What was the biggest challenge for coming up with new stories and plot for the reboot?

Duane Capizzi:

THE biggest? Sigh. I'm not sure I could come up with just one. Plotting is always challenging and we had the brain trust of the room, our trusty white board, and writer assistant to keep the threads of the ongoing storyline together. I think the single biggest ONGOING challenge was tracking which character knew what at any given time.

The caper part was challenging - coming up with new capers and keeping them interesting and fresh. But, it was the characters and their interactions that kept things fresh and interesting. Another museum heist? That's okay - Chase is on the case and he gets to interact with "X" this time (for instance).

There were also some episodes - Duke of Vermeer and Crackle Goes Kiwi come to mind - where there was SO MUCH SET UP needed to get the payoffs to work. I was really worried about too much talk/too much detail. Very "Swiss watch!" It took a lot of work to make sure it all clicked and was clear - hopefully it seems effortless on screen but I can't say there wasn't some sweat and the occasional tear (mostly from me - I'm a big cry baby

But really, what made it fun was that we had so many buckets to draw from: sometimes a story germ initially began with a character idea; sometimes it was inspired by global location; sometimes it was a clever way to update or reimagine an idea from old Carmen lore. Usually, it was some combination of all of the above!

PizzaHorse:

What was your favorite scene to write?

Duane Capizzi:

I think we have a theme here! "How can I pick just one ...?"

As a film buff, I got to indulge in some serious fan nerdery on this show: I got to write spy movies, yakuza movies, spaghetti neo-westerns (though turning it on its head: spaghetti westerns usually involve REVENGE and because of Carmen's character make up, this was sort of anti-revenge).

Is writing coming up with the idea or typing it? Haha. An "if a tree falls in the forest" question. The writing team and I had so many cathartic "that's how it goes" in the room. But on my own, writing the Pilot, was a very inspiring time for me: I remember laughing out loud the moment I thought of Chase falling on his own car (in part because of doing my spin on "that trope" that we've seen in so many hard boiled movies recently). But also how emotional I got when I imagined the simple but potent image of Black Sheep deciding to take her destiny into her own hands and walk that long corridor to the Faculty who we were about to meet for the first time.

I think I've cited this in another interview, but there was a period where I was completely immersed in Chase's arc and the scene where he would crack the location of VILE island ... by listening to Julia in a dream ... was a big one for me. It revealed he was finally open to admitting he needed Julia more than he would ever admit - yet, it was his own subconscious speaking.

The next morning, after cracking that scene, I bumped into Raf Petardi (voice of Chase) ... at the supermarket! It was very strange and hilarious

PizzaHorse:

Did you scrap any lengthy or funny scenes that you would be able to share?

Duane Capizzi:

With few exceptions, most scene cuts are done at the script stage so that the story board team doesn't waste effort over boarding. A variety of trims to any script are common, but they are usually for the better

The easier question to answer might be scenes were part of our "wish list" at writer room stage, but never made it to story or script. I hesitate to go too deep here (in the event that we might ever do more Carmen episodes in this canon - I'm not giving up hope). And there were cases where things we wanted to do earlier in the series wound up getting nixed or not fitting for whatever reason, but we got them in later - USUALLY FOR THE BETTER. So there's sort of a reverse Murphy's Law/rule of good fortune somehow in these things. But some fun things that didn't make it into the show, that leap to mind were: a Bollywood dance sequence (!). A Vegas caper involving Brunt wanting to steal an Elvis jumpsuit against the backdrop of an Elvis impersonator convention. We also thought it would be neat to get Maelstrom imprisoned so that Julia could interrogate him and he would play mind games with her - very Lector/Clarice!

PizzaHorse:

Were there any different treatments of Carmen you pitched before settling on the one we ended up with?

Duane Capizzi:

I was one of several "pitches" that I'm sure HMH heard before running with my version. But I can honestly say I've never pitched anything as fully formed: the take on Carmen felt so right to me, and clearly HMH and by extension Netflix agreed

I'll answer your question with an anecdote: I had the entire Pilot pretty well worked out, and pitched it in the first meeting. But one key thing that changed (much for the better!), simply because it wouldn't have fit without slogging things down ...

In my Pilot pitch, Black Sheep's escape on the boat was off screen: we see Shadowsan corner her, then we cut away. The rest of the Faculty show up to find SS's broken sword on the rocks, and are led to believe BS killed him (!). In the present, Crackle points his weapon at Carmen and prepares to pull the trigger. We know that Chase is on the way and may rescue her. The compartment door opens to reveal - not Chase - but Shadowsan! Big surprise! Then we cut back to BS's escape and find out what really transpired etc etc.

Crazy, right? SS would have been hanging out with the gang in season 1; we might not have gotten to 203 with his back story, since his sword was broken and he couldn't return it. Just one of those magical things where "things work out" the way they are supposed to. THAT SAID, it made for a heckuva pitch

PizzaHorse:

Are there any characters that ended up taking a direction you didn't initially anticipate?

Duane Capizzi:

GRAY.

I didn't know we'd make him amnesiac when I wrote the Pilot, that was something we came up with in our first week Writer Room.

And even then, when it became clear he'd be a key piece of the bigger puzzle, we didn't know how exactly (mostly the Season 4 stuff).

We did get very deep with a version where 404 ended with his protective streak for Carmen kicking into high gear, and they would be fighting off Vile Guards back to back in perfect tandem. Then, having chosen Carmen over VILE, it was Carmen who actually orchestrates Gray going "off grid" so that VILE can never find him again. Funny, I know that is arguably the version of Gray's arc that many fans might have preferred seeing. But in the tradition of spy thrillers and film noir, and for a lone wolf character like Carmen who is focused on her life mission and not romance, we stand behind where we went with him. We felt it was so much more compelling ... and truly more emotional that he totally has a get out of jail free card when he sacrifices everything (including his life, potentially) to save Carmen.

when she needs him most!

I know I made some controversial comments about Gray "not being good enough for Carmen" and I'd like to clarify that I meant, until that final episode. What he did was so selfless and heroic. Is there hope for them in the future? Who knows?! But I do hope we get to explore that one day

I'm sure Gray is living off the grid somewhere now, inspired by Carmen's selfless good and thinking of her from time to time.

PizzaHorse:

You mentioned in the interview with Alicyn that Carmen is a love story, but you were cut off before you could finish discussing. Could you elaborate on your answer now?

Duane Capizzi:

Ugh, yes! Sorry about that. I actually answered that privately for someone so will cut and paste that response here. Let's see if it works.

Something we never said in the show, but something I imparted to the creative team was: Carmen Sandiego is (among other things) a LOVE STORY, where every character in our ensemble is in love with Carmen in one way or another. Even if they don't know it! That love can take different forms: we see how spurned by Carmen Coach Brunt feels and why she retaliates so excessively. Chase eventually comes to realize that he too loves Carmen, even if he wasn't initially aware of it haha. One of the most moving things to me about the series is how all of the different factions come to Carmen's rescue at the end when she's not "in her right mind," without knowing the others are there too. It's a massive group effort to bring back the Carmen they love. But we weren't looking for a fairy tale ending for Carmen with ANYone - Carmen's a classic lone wolf anti-hero, that goes with the territory. At least at this stage in her journey.

PizzaHorse:

Were there other locations that you wanted to feature in the show that didn't make it?

Duane Capizzi:

I think we managed to cover a lot of ground and "cadence" between different countries/cultures/continents was important to us. Many "iconic" locations of course, and it would have been nice to explore some lesser known locations if we had more episodes.

One that we almost did was Niagara Falls, Canada - actually literally going to the Falls and doing a big hydro-electric caper, where Player could actually get into the field with Carmen and the team.

But ultimately, we wound up bringing Player into the fold the way we did and wound up stronger as a result. It made his "first face to face" with Carmen even more impactful, IMO.

PizzaHorse:

Were there any changes in production between the first half and the second half of the series?

Duane Capizzi:

Well, there was that Covid thing

But while it was no doubt a colossal undertaking to get the entire staff transitioned to work from home (animators! and their equipment!), we managed to make up for lost time WITHOUT a dip in animation quality. My fedora's off to our amazing team at Wildbrain for pulling it off!

We did lose some staff between orders, but that is a natural part of production unfortunately. Namely, one of our episodic directors Kenny Park, our first storyboard artist Dennis Crawford, and our story editor May Chan were among those who moved on to other shows during the break. But, as hard as their shoes were to fill, fill them we did!

PizzaHorse:

What is your favorite season?

Duane Capizzi:

Easy. Hands down, Season 3.

(crickets)

KIDDING!

Again, another "they're all my babies" answer (and yes, I love Season 3 equally

It's hard, because really when you step back I'm sure you'll agree it's a series, with stand alone capers; but it's really all ONE BIG MOVIE.

Season 3 is like the scherzo of a symphony: the shortest movement of four, and the one that tees up the big finale.

That's my hoity toity answer but I'm going to put to rest all of the various theories on what happened with season 3. It was a combination of two things: Netflix's desire to experiment with different ways of "dropping" seasons, and their desire to do a holiday themed drop (in this case Halloween, naturally). It became our challenge to come up with a theme (easy enough: masks), and the bigger challenge to serve their need while not interrupting our ongoing narrative. A challenge to be sure, but a challenge met. I think the biggest bump was perception: it was a short season and I know that was disappointing to many. But, by design.

So, Season 3 = an essential part of the whole. I don't think there's a wasted episode, and it gets everyone into position for the big finish. I can't pick a favorite season - you can't make me

PizzaHorse:

Were there any characters you had wanted to give more time to but couldn't due to time/plot restraints?

Duane Capizzi:

Well, there's the "what was on the white board" answer but hopefully some of those ideas will see the light of day in some way, shape or form some day. I think if we had more episodes, we would have shaken up the internal dynamic of VILE a bit more (as hinted at Brunt's displeasure with Maelstrom for leaving her hanging out to dry at end of 405 - a seed we planted "just in case," as some have noted). And we had more scenes in mind with Chase's partnering with Carmen for the first time that we had to cut to the bone because of what little room we had in that otherwise packed episode (worry not: it's mostly more gags, more embellishment, more twists and turns - but the important stuff is there). Mostly, and I don't think it would have been right for Season 4 but I hope to tell in the future, I think there's an interesting history between Shadowsan and Lady Dokuso - possibly tragic - that I would love to explore one day. (She was a cameo in Duke of Vermeer at the dinner party BTW, I'm not sure if anyone noticed. And we built a bigger role for her out of that)

PizzaHorse:

What are some pre-2000/nostalgic Carmen references you snuck into the show? Do you have a favorite reference that was included?

Duane Capizzi:

Doing that was so much fun! I'd say roughly 60% of the characters were from previous iterations of Carmen, though often in name only. We had fun reimagining most everyone to make them more relevant or updated or giving them a more colorful personality for starters.

"Suhara" was Carmen's Japanese mentor when she worked at the ACME Agency in a flashback episode in the 90's series, for instance. I don't think I need to spell out how we turned that one inside out

And Tigress was also one episode only: she was a "rival thief" to Carmen, but revealed to be an ACME agent in disguise - a persona created solely to bait Carmen. It was really cool of course, but it seemed like untapped potential so we made her an ACTUAL Vile Thief.

My own internal rule was to make sure the references/easter eggs wouldn't confuse anyone - they were there for those who were in the loop and window dressing. The one and only time i broke that rule was Dark Carmen's line from 407: "I do it for the mental gymnastics." It was one of the most absurd lines from the 90's series (IMO) and i was determined to have it come out of Dark Carmen's mouth. I'm sure it left some 7 year olds scratching their heads

aside from that, the key references were the music: I still tingle at how we worked the Rockapella theme into the Interactive Special; and the 90's main title theme (composed by Mozart!), in our Vienna episode ("They're playing my song"). If you wanted Rockapella or Carmen as a bad guy, well ... be careful what you wish for!

PizzaHorse:

Was there any improvised content from recording sessions that made it into any episodes?

Duane Capizzi:

Yes! Not much, because a lot of it would have pushed us into TV-MA haha

Mostly Mary Elizabeth - Coach Brunt has a POTTY MOUTH!

Mikey and Abby usually riffed their banter WAY beyond what was on the written page and had us in stitches. Some bits definitely made it in! But mostly there was too much or it would get off point (hmmm, much like my interview answers maybe? haha)

Sharon Muthu did rise to Pun Goddess status with "Mask and you shall receive." And Raf pitched me "Chasse means hunt in French" after one session and I said: "I'm going to write that in." I don't think he believed me. You can't say I'm not a straight shooter.

PizzaHorse:

If you could get more season, would you do it, and what type of story would you tell?

Duane Capizzi:

Well if that hasn't been clear so far, ABSOLUTELY

There have been discussions of course. It's up to the powers that be at this point. I will say this: the beauty and tradition so far has been that every iteration has been its own thing. I definitely think there are more "different canon" versions of Carmen that can be had and be a part of this wonderful tradition. After all, there were many naysayers for our version when it was first announced.

I will also say that if we don't get to tell any more stories in this canon with these characters, we've left a perfect gem that will stand the test of time. I would rather go out on a high note than overstay our welcome.

All that said, we worked within the allotted episodes given, ended it as we wished, but left the door open for other stories. I'd love to do an expansion and a deepening: pick up where we left off; find out what happened in those two years; and proceed to do the equivalent of Godfather II or Better Call Saul as related to the amazing originals they followed.

Let's hope! Keep putting good vibes out there!

PizzaHorse:

If you could pick a character on Carmen Sandiego who'd you switch places with for a day (you get to control their life and they get to control yours) who would you pick, and why?

Duane Capizzi:

Okay, THIS is difficult. So you're going Freaky Friday on me?

on a Sunday?

Hmmm, I know Ivy would get along with my cat ... but then I'd have to hang out with Zack!

That's the trick: I can't pick my favorites cuz I couldn't hang out with them!

(not that I have favorites - they're all my babies haha)

Okay, I have one: ROUNDABOUT. I could fill Shadowsan's seat - how cool is that? Then, I could enact all my evil fantasies - but still have a get out of jail free card cuz he'd be sitting at my desk!

(cut to Duane being brain wiped - D'oh!)

PizzaHorse:

Who are two characters who don't really interact in the show that you think could be good friends or work really well together?

Duane Capizzi:

Hmmmm. Okay, now I'm going to give you quick and sassy answers. Gray and Julia! They'd be so cute banding together to rescue captive Carmen (for instance). And they could also duke it out and maybe settle things between themselves re: shipping controversies instead of dragging me into it

PizzaHorse:

The FINAL QUESTION. Have you learned anything super impactful while working on the show?

Duane Capizzi:

Aside from Iceland's terrifically low crime rate?

I think I have learned to never underestimate how meaningful characters can be to fans. Social media has obviously brought us a lot closer to our fan base in more immediate ways: it's been really gratifying to hear/see/read feedback and not be writing things in a vacuum. It's been gratifying to see that ideas that were meaningful to myself and the creative team on Carmen that were crafted with care, have also resonated with our fan base. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE who has traveled on this journey with us - for embracing Carmen's world view, and her friends and foes alike. Take care everyone! Stay safe! This has been fun, thanks for having me!

PizzaHorse:

HUGE thank you to Duane Capizzi: for being here today.

Thank you everyone for watching and reacting!

Duane Capizzi:

Okay, gotta run - just gotta find the door

Anyway, really: THIS HAS BEEN AMAZING. I speak for everyone involved in the creation and production of Carmen: it has been an amazing and inspiring series and we're elated to see it connect with such a CREATIVE, TALENTED and INTELLIGENT fan base. Take care everyone! Until next crime...

[roseyful]

Mars Red: Edge of the Nightmare - Review

Now, my Tumblr has been a bit quiet lately (been queuing a lot of things so then it wasn’t too quiet during my absence), but it has been for a good reason; last month I was approached [on my private twitter account] and asked if I would be able to playtest a game and write a review, and of course, being someone that enjoys games, especially those that follow an otome style, I had to say YES.

So its proud to say that after a while of playing the game, I finally get to write this review.

Now before I get into the game itself, I would like to take the moment to give appreciation to the team for being so helpful during my time of playtesting the game and before that, as not only would they let us know when there was an issue and the date had to be pushed back, they were so polite and helpful whenever I would run into a problem. That’s something you’d want to see in a gaming company and I’m so glad that my first experience with this company is one with positive results. I personally found no issues with the team themselves, and I do hope they keep this up after the release. Thank you favary for being so lovely and patient with me, and other beta testers.

Mars Red: Edge of The Nightmare was the game that they asked for me to play, however when I originally looked at their website, I couldn’t help but notice that the concept was originally one of a ‘Sound Theatre’, and while I couldn’t figure out what that was, I eventually was lead down a rabbit hole and ended up looking at the other things that Bun-O Fujisawa has worked in. Very interesting stuff, just like the game. However, it’s best to look at his other stuff in your own time.

Please note: I will be keeping this spoiler-free for the sake of letting people go in with no idea of what’s going on besides what I mention and on the website.

Story

The game is set in the early twentieth century in Japan, or better known as the Taisho, in which the website also says ‘[is] influenced by Romanticism’, in which vampires rule the night, as they could only feed off blood and those that stepped into the sun would surely die. Keen senses, incredible physical abilities, and yet they were still vulnerable. You see that very early on with the main character that we play as; Yutsufusa Yuki, a vampire whom became one against his will.

I will be honest, I did not like Yutsufusa when I first started playing, as I felt like he was a bit too willing to die, but that is something that you can overlook when you get further into the story. Yutsufusa is obviously one of the youngest in the group, due to the fact he wears the more ‘modern’ [at the time] clothing out of everyone, well, there is someone else who wears similar clothing but he’s human.

You control Yutsufusa throughout the game, influencing his voices and living his life through his eyes, him acting as the reader insert as you learn about the other characters and begin to grow a bond with them. While the story is a bit slow at first, it does start picking up around the middle-end of chapter 1 and the beginning of chapter 2 after you play the prologue, as you begin to assist “Code Zero” in their work to rid the world of vampires that wish to feast on humans..

Be mindful that there is an anime, however, Yutsufusa does not appear in it, as it focuses on the other main characters, so if you have watched the anime already be sure to remember that they’re either two separate timelines or different points in time. I do not want to confuse anyone with this.

The main cast is quite an interesting bunch, as it covers a wide range of personalities, and sometimes even time periods as you play through the game and unlock things; you might say you might learn a bit of history from it if you end up looking up some of the references I’ve found in the game. This is a great reflection on the idea of ‘immortality, and even has moments where said immortality leans into a few jokes (such as knowledge of birds).

If you’ve played games such as ‘Ikemen Revolution’, you may be familiar with the ticket system. Every day you’re allowed a certain amount of tickets to progress through the story, however, if you run out of tickets and you must read more, then you’re able to progress the story via using ‘amber’, the game’s currency that you can use for different functions. However, this is not needed, as every day your tickets will be replenished. I personally found myself not even needing to use my amber, as I would always wait for the next day. There are mini-stories that you can get if you finish a chapter within a certain amount of time, but I personally don’t find them to progress the story a lot after I read the first one I got. Then again I had other things to occupy my time while I wanted as well. If you wish to reread chapters, you get a bonus third option of currency; coins. Coins can be used to reread chapters in the place of amber or tickets, which means that you can grind out coins via the exploration option in order to see more options (looked at a bit later).

I personally found the story to be engaging, between the use of minigames (or investigations, covered a bit later), it broke up the reading with fun activities that progressed the story.

Is the game an Otome?

No! I was shocked as well when I saw the all-male cast since I was wondering if I was playing a boys love game, but in the end, I was pleasantly surprised to find out that this is actually a detective game. While it may carry the usual look of an otome, with the story and choices of how you speak influencing the endings of chapters, the game more feels like one of finding new friends and solving kick-ass investigations than finding romance. It’s refreshing.

This is especially true between the minigames in which helps influence the story that is all very unique in their own way and do not seem repetitive once you get into the flow of how they work.

Minigames

The minigames come forward in two forms; investigation, interrogation, and infer. Investigation sounds exactly how you’d expect, as you have to poke around and look at things, which you can review in a little notebook that sits in the top right of your screen in the case you need to review what you’ve looked at. When I was first launched into this section for the first time, I had a little trouble remembering exactly what I needed to look at (as I was given a set of things to tap), however, I do have to thank the team for thinking ahead and adding the option to be able to watch ads in order to see what you need to do. This was one of the two times I’d have to watch ads, as they don’t shove them in your face every few seconds like most mobile games do which is rather nice. Sometimes you gain information or items that you have to use later, so it’s a good idea to keep track of what you look at.

Interrogation acts as a question-based information gathering, in which you talk to NPCs in order to gather information to use in the investigation. Like Investigation, these points are put into your notebook for later.

Infer takes the first two investigation segments and combines the information, as you now get interrogated by one of the main characters, and you must respond back with the proper information in order to make sure that this segment is successful. You are able to read back on the notes from the other segments at this point by pressing the button with the book icon in the upper right corner, as this aids you in selecting the right answers. When I first came to this section, I did feel under pressure due to it, but it was interesting to see the negative answers from the character if I got it wrong.

Exploration is another part of the game, that while outside the story, there are parts that require a certain amount of story points in order to clear ‘point blocks’. This is where you get the coins from and frankly is good to use once you have finished using all your tickets for the day and want to use the rest of the time to grind coins. During the exploration, you set up 2 characters, a place, and a set [in real life] time of how long you want them to be out and about. Depending on the number of points earned, you may earn something called a ‘mummer’, which reveals more about the characters you chose to send out, and even get dialogue of the characters interactions (which can be pretty funny in itself) that shows the dynamic of the two characters- are they friends? Are things tense? You get to learn more by sending them out together.

Artstyle

As an artist, I was incredibly pleased with the art of the game, as the characters do not look the game, there are different body types and ages (from teen to elder), you never had to look at the same face twice for two characters. I will be honest, I do wish the characters were a bit more ‘animated’ with their expressions (such as body movement when they’re feeling certain emotions), however other than that, the sprites are magnificent.

The backgrounds are also really interesting to look at and even tell so much story before you even start investigating within the investigation sections. The design team also needs props, because while a few characters are wearing similar outfits, they’re all wearing them in different ways which shows their character and even the way they probably fight. Though I will say I am a bit biased towards Takeuchi, then again, I really enjoy fun and loud characters in general, and his hair is interesting in a sea of mostly black, purple, silver or blonde hair. Maybe will make a fanart of him in the future if I learn to draw his eyepiece. (on that note, please release the full sprites for us artists to reference, we’d love you eternally for it haha).

Oh no, it’s a-

Yes, its a bit of a gacha game, however, you do not need to actually play the gachas in order to progress through the game; it mostly just unlocks bits of story for those that want to have extra stories, or just want that extra dose of dopamine (haha, me). As someone who plays gacha games ever since they turned 13, I was glad that this game isn’t actually gacha centric, and thus is very free-to-play friendly due to this.

Who would I recommend this for and would I recommend it myself?

Personally, I think this is a game that suits the niche of those that enjoy a good mystery and even play those ‘find an item’ games, mixed in with those that enjoy reading otomes and history. Maybe even someone that enjoys theatre since there’s a character that does theatre. Would I personally recommend it? Yes, I would. The game is very interesting and engaging, the staff behind the game are so lovely.

Once more, here’s the game’s website link ❤️: https://marsred-game.net/en/

[thorne93]

The Stars Made Us (Part 7)

Prompt: In this world, you’re one of the “lucky” ones who got a soulmate, but what if the universe gives you more than you bargained for?

(Prompt challenge – You live in a world where your soulmate can write on their skin and you will get the writing on your own and vice versa. Where they can wash away the ink on their own skin, however, the writing is forever scarred onto your skin until you meet face to face)

Word Count: 2438

Warnings: angst and language throughout

Notes: This was supposed to be for @sorryimacrapwriter​​​​  and their challenge like a year ago, I think? I still loved the prompt though and have been working on this story for quite some time. This aesthetic was made by @dontshootmespence​​​​, thank you so much! Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes​​​​, couldn’t have done it without you, as well as @carryonmyswansong​​​​ and @arrow-guy​​​​ and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​​​

~~~~~~~~~~~

Also, I’ve never really liked the whole soulmate AU thing idea, but this felt so right and it was amazing to write. I hope y’all love it too!!

The next morning, you were about to meet Hank after the routine you’d set up when you saw Charles make his way towards the alcohol in the study. 

“No,” you said sternly, following him in and taking the bottle from him. “No alcohol before noon.” 

“I beg your pardon? This is my house. You are a guest here, and if I want to drink from sun up to sun down I bloody will,” he said, anger clear in his tone and frown as his eyes raked your form.

“Just until noon,” you repeated calmly. “Surely your serum will hold out until then? Why don’t you go set up a game of chess and I’ll be in the library to meet you shortly.” 

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were trying to distract me,” he noted, his face a mask of humor. 

“Good thing you don’t know any better,” you teased with a tight smile. “Please? I know it’s a passion of yours and I’ve always wanted to play.”

“Wait, you’ve never played chess?”

You shook your head, innocence wrapping your face and gesture. “No.”

“Why not? Hasn’t everyone?” 

“I was much more of a gin rummy kind of girl,” you explained. 

“Ah, I see. Not in my wheelhouse but I could give that a go,” he offered. 

“I’d love to show you… So, uh, off to the library then?” you asked. 

He smiled and laughed. “Yes, I suppose we are meeting in there. Five minutes?” 

“Sounds perfect,” you said with a smile. 

He swept around you and as soon as he was out of sight you broke out into a sprint to find Hank.

“Hey, where’d you disappear to? I’ve started on extracting the--”

“I can’t help. Not this morning.”

“What? Why not?” 

“Charles was going to start drinking and the only thing I could think of to divert his attention was a game of chess so… we’re playing chess.” 

His eyebrows shot up. “So while I’m in here, you’re going to be playing a game?” 

“I know, I’m sorry, but you want him to get better right? Maybe it’s best he has some company with humans rather than with a glass and a needle.”

Hank’s face fell. 

“I’m sorry, Hank, I know you’re doing the best you can. I just… We need to keep him focused and away from the alcohol. Think you can work on this without me?” 

“Yeah, I’ll do my best,” he said, a touch of disappointment in his tone. 

“Thanks, you’re the best. I’ll try to be back as fast as I can.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he sadly replied. “Just… go keep him company.” 

An expression of sad sympathy colored your face. All you did was nod before dashing off to the library. Charles was sitting on the right side, a small table set up with chess as he sat there staring at the board. 

You were surprised at how your heart felt every time you laid eyes on him. Even in his worst state, this man made you feel… grounded. It was as if you were walking around half-empty, then you got close to him and everything felt right with the world. Even if he was drug and alcohol dependent and a bit of an asshole, just being in his presence, everything was okay.

You walked in and sat down across from him, honestly a little nervous. Knowing this man through a screen was one thing, but sitting down across from him, it was an entirely different feeling. A different dynamic, especially since it had been a year since you’d even spoken. 

How much had he changed? How had you changed? Talking every day with one person, you knew what to expect. He was in grad school, you were in residency. He was working towards teaching, you were dealing with patients. It was a no brainer. You swapped stories of graduations, accolades, promotions, and victories. What stories would you swap now? How his adopted sibling had abandoned him, his spine neglecting his ability to walk, his school ripped away from him, not a friend in the world except the two people in this mansion with him. What kind of stories would those be?

“Alright,” you started cheerily, “how do we play?”

“So you’ve really never played?” he asked with a bemused grin. 

“No. I started to learn the rules once, from my uncle, but the idea of losing pieces just to win an endgame... “You shook your head. “It seems barbaric.” 

He laughed gently. “There’s nothing barbaric about it. It’s a highly intellectual game that involves strategy and knowing your opponent.” 

You looked up through your lashes as you glanced down at the board. “And you think you know me?” 

“I’d like to think I do, after ten years.” 

You made a noise of contemplation. “Hmm, I was under the impression you didn’t remember a thing about me.” 

“Wanting to forget you and forgetting you are two vastly different things, Y/N.” 

You smiled. 

“You’ve never said my name before,” you noted quietly, your heart fluttering and warming. He might not think it was important, or nice at all, but you’d waited a very long time to hear this. 

You were on a very different side of this romance. It appeared Charles wasn’t ready for it, but you were very much prepared to jump right in. Every little sentimental action he did, every little way he tilted his mouth, the way his eyes penetrated your very soul, the way his accent fell off his lips -- it was practically intoxicating. Here you were, swimming like a school girl like the night you found out you had a soulmate; yet it seemed for Charles you were just a guest to interact with, to mildly entertain. 

It tore your heart asunder. 

“I’m slowly learning to right some of my wrongs,” he said in a soft voice. “Alright, let’s see, so you have the pawn and the pawn can move like this, see?” he began and he took about ten minutes explaining the game to you, being very patient. 

“You ready to begin?” 

“Sure.”

So the two of you sat, playing chess, not saying a word for about twenty minutes, only halfway through the game. 

“So, did you play this when you had your powers?” you inquired cautiously. 

“Actually,” he began, making his move, taking your rook, “I did.” 

“Did you use them?” 

“I tried not to,” he explained, “but it’s like music playing in the background. You can pick up on things people are thinking if it’s loud, distinct, or stands out. So sometimes I would hear what they were thinking, sometimes I didn’t. I tried to ignore it.” 

“How did you learn to control them?”

“Practice. Quieting them was...is… the hardest part. Once that’s done, I can do the rest easily.” 

“And all the other… facets, like accessing memories, how did you learn how to do that? On a girlfriend or?” 

He laughed, his eyes never leaving the board as you studied your moves as well. “Are you trying to probe to see if I had a girlfriend previous to our… relationship?” 

You gave a quick half smile, filled with amusement. “I wasn’t consciously, but I suppose it slipped out. You’re avoiding the question, should I assume I’m right?” 

“You know, Dr. Y/L/N, not everything or everyone has to be psychoanalyzed,” he countered teasingly. 

“I know, I know. I just… I’m curious about that part of your life, that’s all.” 

“For your information, I didn’t test on my girlfriend. I actually used my step-brother. When he bullied me, afterwards, I’d probe his mind. I realized I could access memories, get into his head, and learned in there. At first, it was an accident, and I couldn’t break the link… but then when we went to sleep, it broke. Later, I purposely tried to connect, disconnect, and read thoughts. Until his father died, and they moved out that is…” 

“Did Raven ever meet Cain?”

“No. No, Raven came to us a few months after Cain’s father died and he moved away to live with his aunt.” 

“I see. So you practiced on your abusive step brother?” 

“It was all I had. Doing that to my mother felt wrong, Raven asked that I never do it to her, and with the kids at school I couldn’t tell if I was reading memories or fantasies. Your move by the way.”

“Oh, yes, right,” you said, snapping out of your sympathy induced trance. You made an arbitrary move before getting back to the conversation. “So no girlfriend?” 

“Like a dog with a bone,” he muttered.

“I prefer the term persistent.”

“No, no girlfriend in the picture. Not for some time. I dated briefly, just after Harvard.” 

“So… when you were seventeen?” 

“Mhm. She was an undergrad. She wasn’t very mature though, so it was over before it began. I knew I wouldn’t find anyone on my level. I couldn’t even legally buy cigarettes but I had graduated college, so… the odds of me finding anyone worthy of my time were slim. Of course, that was before your scribbling showed up on my arm.” 

“That wasn’t scribbling,” you accused with a laugh, fake offense in your tone. “I put a lot of time, thought, and effort into that, thank you.” 

“If that’s your example of a lot of time and effort then maybe I still haven’t met my intellectual match, hmm?” he joked. 

You narrowed your eyes before taking his bishop. 

“Maybe you spoke too soon,” you challenged as he glanced up at you and you raised an eyebrow. 

“Perhaps I did. And you?” 

“What about me?” 

“Did you have a highschool sweetheart before you knew about me?” 

“Oh, well… I don’t really see how it’s relevant--”

“Double standard, Y/N. That isn’t very nice. I was probed about my entire romantic career but I can’t get so much as a--”

“Fine. Yes. I dated. Two guys in high school. One lasted about eight months from January of sophomore year to the beginning of junior year.”

“And the second?” 

“Four months of junior year.”

“No one dazzled you senior year?” 

“Just you,” you hummed, not thinking before you answered. 

“Oh, just me?” he asked, catching your little slip up. 

Your cheeks heated before you smiled. “Yes, if I’m being totally honest.”

He was looking at you, curiosity and merriment burning in his face. He’d only glanced at you three times during this whole game. In a way, you were thankful. When he gave you a direct look you felt like you always had to overshare. When he was looking down at the board you could focus on answering carefully, filtering. When he was staring at you, it was like truth serum. 

“So what happened with the other two?” he questioned as his attention drifted back down to the board. 

“One was determined that I follow him, you know, go to the college he had his eye on, despite what I wanted. So we parted ways.” You made a move. “And the other liked a friend of mine more so we mutually ended things.” 

“Sounds like you haven’t had any bad luck with men, so that’s good.” 

“Sounds like you haven't had any luck with women. One woman throughout your whole life? You’re thirty-two.” 

“Yes, so?” 

“Well, if you only dated at seventeen--”

“Y/N, I met you, my soulmate, at twenty-one. I didn’t date after that, so, most of my life, has been with you… Romantically, that is, if that’s what you want to call this.”

“You swore off dating for me?” 

“Of course,” he said as if it were obvious, “didn’t you do the same for me?” 

“Yeah without question.”

“So why do you find it odd that I did the same?” 

“Well,” you started, nervously wringing your hands, “you’re you, you know? Handsome, accomplished, driven, confident.” 

“And you’re just a wet rag? Or what am I missing? You’re all those things as well, except handsome. I’d choose a different word.” 

“And what word might that be?” 

“Nothing short of stunning.”

His words made you blush quickly and smile to yourself. 

“So tell me, why did you commit to us but were worried I didn’t?” he wondered.

“You just have so much more going for you than I do.” 

“That’s not true. I know quite a bit about you and you’re quite the catch. Not to mention, I’m not like that. I was dedicated to you the moment we encountered each other.” 

“I’m glad to know you felt the same about this.” 

“Of course,” he concurred before the two of you finished the game, with him beating you easily. 

“Ugh, see that’s why I don’t like that vile game.” 

He chuckled. “It’s a fantastic game. You did quite well for your first time. I bet you’ll beat me next time.” 

You couldn’t help but laugh, loudly. “Not likely.”

“You should believe in yourself more.” 

“I believe in myself plenty, except when it comes to strategy games.”

“But you play gin rummy?” 

“Well that’s entirely different,” you assured with a smile as the two of you cleared the chess game. 

“Is it now? Well let’s just see. I’ve got some cards in my desk drawer there. Show me how to play  and we’ll see if it’s all that different.” 

“Okay, sure. You got to show your prowess, I’ll show you mine.” 

“There’s that feistiness I missed,” he cheered as you got up and got the cards, his words making you stop for half a second. 

So he did miss you...

“Okay, so the game is easy, especially compared to that mini war game we just played,” you joked and he smiled. Knowing you could do that to him lit you up inside. 

You explained the game, all the rules and played. He caught on quickly, which didn’t surprise you - he was practically a genius. What did surprise you however, was that he beat you at your own game. 

“How the hell did you--?” you started, flabbergasted, staring down at the table. 

“All strategy games are the same, Y/N. I’ve been playing them for a while.” 

“But this is my game and you, you just beat me.” 

“Oh, don’t be a sore loser. You’ll do fine next time.” 

“I should’ve done fine this time,” you mumbled. “Well I need to get dinner made, so I’ll be off. See you for dinner?” 

He nodded and smiled and you left, reflecting on the good bit of information you’d learned that day. And focusing on how this might not be as bad as you thought.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Forever Tag:

@essie1876​​​​​

@magpiegirl80​​​​​

@letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked​​​​​

@iamwarrenspeace

@marvel-imagines-yes-please​​​​​

@superwholocked527

@missinstantgratification​​​​​

@thejemersoninferno​​​​​

@rda1989​​​​​

@munlis​​​​​

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@kaeling

@friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo​​​​​

@damalseer​​​​​

@heyitscam99​​​​

@yknott81​​​​

@sorryimacrapwriter​​​​​

@glitterquadricorn​​​​​

@xxqueenofisolationxx

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@alyssaj23​​​​​

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@sarahp879​​​​​

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@marvelmayo​​​​​

@lyniboy​​​​​

@paintballkid711​​​​

Charles Xavier

@bohemianrhapsody86​​​​

@lenawiinchester​​​​​​

TSMU

@tilltheendwilliwrite​​​​​

[thewriting-corner]

‘Renegades’ trilogy by Marissa Meyer: review

Welcome today to a post I have been waiting to do for months. I never do entire posts for book reviews, but since this was a trilogy (and one of my favorites I read this year) I decided it would deserve a little more.

Note: I will be doing a spoiler-free review first and then I’ll put a warning before talking about each individual book :)

Synopsis: The Renegades are a syndicate of prodigies—humans with extraordinary abilities—who emerged from the ruins of a crumbled society and established peace and order where chaos reigned. As champions of justice, they remain a symbol of hope and courage to everyone... except the villains they once overthrew.

Trilogy Review ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I honestly think these are the best books I’ve ever read. The description was fascinating, easy to follow and gave amazing imagery without that heaviness that a lot of fantasy books have (this is more sci-fi/dystipia-ish but still).

The characters felt real and their individual voices were clear from start to finish. I loved every single character, even the ones I hated. 

However, there is one thing that bothered me BUT it does align with their world and that is the lack of accountability certain characters recieve (but I will be talking about that in my Supernova review).

Then the PLOT OH MY GOSH. I mean, it’s superheroes. It’s nearly impossible to be original with a plot that isn’t the same as any Marvel or DC comic/movie/show. And yet Marissa Meyer that such a beautiful job of taking a common conflict (heroes vs villains, villains wanting to take over the world) and turning it into a unique plot with amazing twists. 

I mentioned the world-building before, but I’ll do it again. Third person POV is not my favorite and neither is heavy world building like the one this book needed and had. Still, it was written in such a simple way that I didn’t feel like she was trying to confuse me, it was just a story.

Overall, this series was amazing and I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a fast paced, mind-blowing world building and compelling characters that will make you feel single to the core even in a relationship.

🚨Spoilers Ahead🚨

Renegades ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

“We were all villains in the beginning.”

I went into this book with low expectations because I didn’t think I’d like Marissa Meyer’s style and boy was I wrong.

The first few chapters were a bit confusing but the moment Adrian fixed Nova’s bracelet I KNEW this would steer towards romance and it sold me. And then Nightmare making fun of the Sentinel for his comic book phrases and poses was my favorite thing ever. That would be me as a superhero, no doubt.

I really liked the way the plot progressed “slowly” without feeling dragged on. In fact, despite it’s slower pace of the story, the book still felt quick and that just won a million points with me.

Don’t even get me started on the Anarchists. I LOVED them. I like how they weren’t presented as villains from Nova’s POV, just enemies of a totalitarian state. Not even just in her point of view though. I genuinely didn’t think any of them were bad until Ingrid decided to show up at the library and almost killed Sketch’s crew.

And speaking of Sketch’s crew … the minor characters??? Hello??? Who writes side characters that are SO good?? Oscar is my favorite though. He wins. Danna being the only one to question Nova about Adrian’a feelings for her was hilarious, although it stressed me out that Nova put her to sleep. Counterpoint: it was very cute that the only way she could stop thinking of Adrian liking her was by putting Danna to sleep. Very on point teenage reaction. I would’ve done the same thing if only I wasn’t trying to remain anonymous in the organization that indirectly killed my parents. 

The climax, on the other hand, felt a teensy bit rushed but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy Nodrian in their not-date. It was adorable, especially when they stopped at the kid’s party and then Nova panicking over the mere thought of going on the ferris wheel with Adrian. All the carnival chapters where my favorite thing ever and I really wished they hadn’t ended with Nova killing the woman who raised her. But I did like the irony of it being Ingrid who told her she didn’t have the guts to press the trigger and then she died at the hands of Nova’s gun. 

AND THE ENDING WITH ACE BEING ALIVE. That shook me. I suspected it, of course, but it shook me to my core. 10/10 plot twist there.

Archenemies ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

“I guess I figured you deserve to have good dreams every once in a while. Even if you never sleep.”

This one gets six stars because somehow I read it in 11 hours and I’ve never read such a large book in one day. The entire story was just fast-paced action, superhero world building and Nodrian flirting and eventually kissing. Best book ever.

I liked how in this book we got a closer look into other character relationships like Oscar and Ruby and then Danna’s suspicions over Nova. I would’ve liked to see more of Danna’s friendship with the team though, since at times it seemed she was only there to send passive aggressive comments at Nova. And the Sentinel’s “death” was amazing. Pure comic book material right there. 

There is this thing though that I mentioned in the general review that bothered me and it’s when they reveal Agent N. This weapon they created using Max’s blood is a great example of how the Renegades had obtained way too much power. It’s when we start to see that maybe Nova and the Anarchists are right. The Renegades are slowly becoming a dictatorship and it’s bothersome that nobody except Nova and Adrian notice. Especially when it was so obvious with things like them using Agent N “against every prodigy who didn’t follow the Renegades code”. Sure, they were criminals, but that wasn’t about arresting them. It was about changing the DNA of people who made one mistake and were immediately deemed enemies of the state.

Back to the good stuff, Nodrian flirting was the highlight of this book. They’re both so awkward and adorable, especially when Nova’s teaching Adrian how to shoot and then when they’re in his room later on. The whole “you want me to ignore everything?” and “you’re not allowed to have girls in your room?” quotes KILLED me. Those were peak flirting moments and I’m immensely surprised by the way that Marissa Meyer manages to write teenagers realistically as an adult and not even having teenage kids of her own. Also, Nova opening up to Adrian was just. No. It killed me. My ghost is writing this btw.

The ending, once again, amazing. I loved it. Not only did it once again show Frostbite’s true colors, show us how much hate Adrian actually held against Nightmare and the way Nova had softened by the Renegades’ influence. And Ace Anarchy’s capture goes into the good things pile.

Supernova ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

“To be honest, I’m not sure there are such things as villains anymore. Maybe there never really were.”

Is it a bad review if I just insert the word “AH” for the next ten lines? Yes? Damn it. I admit that I was expecting something much different, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. I have never cursed and squealed so much by reading and had I not bought the hardcover with my own money, I would’ve thrown that book against the wall. It stressed me out. First of all, getting Nova and Adrian kissing in the tunnels a few chapters before Adrian arrests her for being Nightmare was another level of messed up. Clearly, she did everything in her power to save him from her house’s explosion and he threw it out the window in blind anger. And then the whole execution thing??? That was horrifying and it’s when the Renegades’ incompetence really showed its true colors. They couldn’t bring the people back to their side - because they failed - so they sentenced a broken, dying man and an underage girl who acted under the manipulation of her entire family, to death. If Hugh had ever even attempted to find out what happened to both Artino girls, none of that mess would’ve happened, but instead Lady Indomitable died and he went “WELL, can’t do anything about her last task, can we?” I get he was preoccupied by her orphaned son and the Ace of Anarchy, but it was as simple as going back into the house and searching. In fact, this entire book was just showing how their society was crumbling and in the end they went “we were all heroes”. I’m surprised Nova forgave the entire Renegades organization for what they did because even if it was Ace who sent a hit after her and her family, the Renegades were still willing to overuse their power. 

And once again back to the good stuff before I end up bashing the Renegades even more, I never thought I would be on board with Adrian and Nova’s relationship at the end of the book. I try not to ship toxic relationships in YA because they happen a lot and I wouldn’t like younger readers to think that it’s okay, but I loved how both Nova and Adrian were willing to make a change for their relationship to work. They compromised because they loved each other so much it didn’t matter who had tried to kill the other person and their dad or who hadn’t advocated against the other’s execution, you know, the ups and downs of every relationship. While I do wish we had seen them talking about everything, I get a book can only have a certain amount of words and I was glad just the same with how it ended. Also, Leroy’s threat to Adrian is iconic, just like Oscar proclaiming his undying love for Ruby at the arena were they almost witnessed multiple murders.

The epilogue. Just. Wow. I knew it before because I’m smart and I spoiled it but I NEED another Renegades book. You can’t just end the series saying Evie Artino was Magpie and her being as angry as Nova once was. Like, no. You just can’t. That was a crime against humanity, tbh, but overall the series was amazing and I have never been more grateful to spend almost $80 in books. 

[keyofjetwolf]

Hi would you like some rage about She-Ra season 5?

If the answer is no, please don’t click below. For real. Really for real. I’m not looking to piss in anyone’s Cheerios. I think if you were satisfied (or better!) with the show, that’s fantastic and I envy you. As I have always said, love what you love. My opinion is mine and means precisely nothing beyond that. If you think you may be even a little bummed reading about how someone didn’t like it, skip this post and go on with your day, I promise you’re not missing anything worthwhile.

IN A SIMILAR VEIN: If -- before, during, or after reading -- you feel inclined to argue with me, I am begging you to please not. I cannot begin to tell you how much I don’t want to be argued with on this right now. I’m still extremely disappointed and cranky, and I’m not much in the mood to have a measured, reasoned debate about my feelings. Much as my opinion has no bearing on you, your opinion has no bearing on me, and as I’m giving you the option to opt out, I’d appreciate the same courtesy. If you want to write your own post on your own blog, go nuts! Just please leave me out of it. I PREFER TO BE CRANKY AT TELEVISION SHOWS THAN PEOPLE.

The rest of you, come on down. I don’t promise coherency, but I DO promise a lot of stuff said in all-caps!

---

Hello! Thank you for joining me! We watched the remaining few episodes of She-Ra last night! I hated them! Yaaay!

What did I hate? OH HO HO MANY THINGS FRIENDS MANY THINGS. It’s not just stuff from the final couple of episodes either, I want to clarify. It’s the entire final season, settling on last few episodes like the freshly fallen snow on your front lawn that some frat boys decide to pee their names into. By the time we’d gotten to these last episodes, there was really nothing left for me but confirmation of all the shit I’d come to hate. SO THANKS I GUESS FOR PROVING ME RIGHT

Which isn’t to say there was nothing to enjoy in the final episodes! There was!

5. She-Ra’s Triceps. GET BUFF GIRL. I LOVE how Adora and She-Ra look similar, but very much not identical. Adora’s no slouch when it comes to physical stuff, but they go the extra mile to show us how She-Ra is that much more. HOW RARELY DO YOU GET TO SEE A WOMAN WITH MUSCLES. I’ve been nothing but impressed by the ways the show drew the line between Adora and She-Ra, and however I felt about its handling of other elements, it didn’t let me down here.

4. Sometimes A Family Is A Twink, A Lizard, And Their Imp Baby. I don’t have further commentary on this, and I need none.

3. Welcome Home, Daddy. THIS WAS SO SPECTACULAR. Glimmer had, I would argue, the most realized arc in the story. It was so gratifying to see this as a culmination, not just of her own struggle with her magical power and ability to harness it, but her willingness to do what needs doing, however personally difficult. That was a stumbling point Angelica could never overcome, continually trying to micromanage and protect Glimmer rather than trusting her and recognizing her for the asset she was. Also though, more succinctly: YESSSS BITCH

2. A Shanty! THIS WHOLE SCENE WAS PERFECT NO NOTES. Just the right blend of silly and sincere, a genuine delight as even brainwashed Mermista had had enough of Sea Hawk’s shit, AND so much more clever than it seemed at first glance. THIS IS THE ONLY VALID HETEROSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP IN SHE-RA I AM NOT TAKING QUESTIONS AT THIS TIME

1. Shadow Weaver. SHADOW FUCKING WEAVER. What a complicated, fascinating character, bar none the most interesting in the entire series. I do think they pulled their punch right at the very end with her, but I AM capable of remembering I’m watching a kid’s show, so I can only get so disappointed about it. Mostly, she remained a beautifully morally complex character, and she was one of my greatest personal delights from beginning to end*.

(*) Boy did this show have one single solution for mommy issues though.

THAT WAS ABOUT IT. So let’s get to why we’re all really here, and that is MY SCREAMING OH MY GOD WHERE DO I BEGIN

Nah, I know exactly where to begin.

GLIMMER AND BO JESUS MCTRISKET I AM GOING TO EXPLODE AND SHOWER THE UNIVERSE IN THE SHRAPNEL OF MY HATE

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING

WHERE DID IT COME FROM

HOW CAN I SHOVE IT BACK IN THE HATEFUL SPEWHOLE THAT SIRED THIS BULLSHIT

WHY WHY IS THIS HERE WHY IS THIS IN MY FACE WHERE MY EYES HAVE TO SEE IT FUCK ME SIDEWAYS THIS IS THE MOST UNNECESSARY SHOEHORNED IN HET ROMANCE FUCK A DOODLE NONSENSE I HAVE EVER HAD THE MISFORTUNE TO BEAR WITNESS WHAT IS IT DOING IN THIS OTHERWISE EXPONENTIALLY GAY CARTOON

WERE YOU PANDERING TO THE STRAIGHTS

WHY ARE YOU PANDERING TO THE STRAIGHTS I ASSURE YOU WE ARE COVERED BOTH HISTORICALLY AND FICTIONALLY

ALSO NEED I REMIND YOU THAT YOU HAVE ALREADY ACHIEVED HETEROSEXUAL PERFECTION

NO MERMISTA NO WE ARE NOT ALL JUST LIKE OKAY WITH THIS

Oh my FUCKSTICKS, I could’ve rolled with so much more that angers/disappoints me about She-Ra’s ending if every single thing I feared about this hadn’t proved true.

AND. IT. WAS. SO. UNNECESSARY.

What exactly did pairing off Glimmer and Bo do for the story? For their characters? THIS IS THE PART THAT’S STABBING ME IN THE DELICATE WEBBING OF MY TOES. Because -- COME WITH ME A MOMENT SWEET ANGELS -- because I was under the impression that, oohhhh, I dunno, FRIENDSHIP WAS A HUGE FUCKING IMPORTANT PART OF THIS PASTEL HELLSCAPE

Is it, She-Ra? IS IT REALLY???? When not one but BOTH of your childhood friendship pairings end in romance? When you close out your five seasons with romantic relationships so painfully and specifically sown across the character landscape like an overzealous gardener turned loose on the world?

You know what you have at the end? DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID

THIS ISN’T A BEST FRIENDS SQUAD IT’S A DOUBLE DATE THAT NEVER MERCIFULLY ENDS

And again I ask, Why?? What was it about Glimmer and Bo’s relationship that needed them to become romantic? What was LACKING that this was the solution?

THIS IS WHAT MAKES ME LOSE MY GODDAMN SHITTING MIND I AM SO FUCKING DONE WITH THIS INSIPID MYOPIC TRASHBAG OF A CONCEPT

I believed She-Ra’s entire premise about friendship, I believed it wholeheartedly, and I’m so PISSED that at the close of day, narratively, it swept it all the bin. AND YES, YES IT DID, otherwise, WHY IS IT THERE. It serves no story-based need, it serves no character-based need, it has no NEED at all. So is it meant to be a “reward” to Bo and Glimmer for winning the war, as if their lifelong friendship were not reward enough? Is it meant to show they’ve walked through the flames and emerged with stronger, deeper bonds, because of course a relationship can only go SO deep without fucking. There’s no avenue to Romantic Relationship that doesn’t simultaneously point to something lacking in Platonic Relationship, AND I AM FURY PERSONIFIED

I am so tired of this. I’m SO TIRED of this.

And it didn’t need to be there. They didn’t even TRY to give us a good reason. That may be the part that makes me the angriest. Of COURSE they hook up romantically, of COURSE their platonic love would grow into “more”.

Fuck YOU, She-Ra. I thought you were better than that. YOU WERE SO CLOSE TO BETTER THAN THAT

THEN THERE WAS CATRA

I get it, I guess. I mean, I think it’s shittily written, but I GUESS. Honestly, end of day, I just don’t care about Catra enough to really get too angry about it, particularly when as I’m so fucking incendiary over something much more important to me. But it’s also the show’s greatest creative failure, and even if I HADN’T gotten angrier at other choices, it would’ve still cut its own legs out from under it.

Catra’s “redemption” was weak and sad and did a disservice to her and everyone involved. She started self-centered and shitty, and she ended just as self-centered and shitty, only we’re fine with that now. She learned nothing and changed nothing, but also nobody ever demanded it of her, so I can only lay so much at the character’s feet. The problem is ultimately creative, where I think Noelle Stevenson got lost in her own love of the character, and somewhere along the way forgot that if you take them out that far, you have to be willing to walk them the long road back. Compare to poor Glimmer, for fuck’s sake, whose greatest sin was being desperate enough to be manipulated by the character whose entire fucking DEAL is being THE manipulator. How much shit did she get for that? How long was she punished? Meanwhile Catra becomes THE Big Bad for a while, nearly unravels all of reality in a fit of supreme lesbian angst and self-pity, directly leads to the death of the planet’s ruling monarch who also happens to be GLITTER’S MUM and DIRECT FRIEND TO THE SHOW’S HEROES, but that’s fine, you did one sorta good thing one time and even though it was also wrapped in a thick film of self-pity and a final fuck-you at Adora, all is forgiven!

Speaking of, Adora suffers just as much from stunted growth. From the beginning, her thing was control, unable to free herself from the responsibility of everything and everyone. What did we have at the end? Adora as the only one who could save everything and everyone. Yeah, they kept asking what it was SHE wanted, BUT THEN SHE NEVER ACTUALLY GOT TO CHOOSE. NOT activating the failsafe wasn’t an option for her, and while she wound up not having to die to do it, even that wasn’t her choice in the end, it was Catra’s. (Don’t even get me started on her nth hour “You love me?” fuckery when it wasn’t once for one single second shown to be a question of such life-turning importance.)

All of which could be interesting! That Catra and Adora went through all this, came so far to wind up right where they started? AWESOME. LOVE IT. FUND IT. But really all that happens is nobody minds now that Catra’s a self-involved little shit and tee-hee another Best Friends Squad Mission being bullrushed by Adora within five minutes of ending the last one isn’t that funny?

I can’t even dig much enjoyment out of Adora and Catra as a trope subversion (if one of them was a male, their romantic involvement wouldn’t have even been a QUESTION), because the show lost its fucking mind with romantically pairing everybody off in the final five minutes. WHICH BRINGS ME RIGHT BACK TO MY PREVIOUS SCREAMING SO I’LL STOP THERE.

There was other stuff, of course. I think it was a TERRIBLE decision to spend the last season with the focus split between the two groups of rebels, and writing half the cast into brainwashing. I think the Nettossa and Spinnerella stuff was wasted and lacked any punch at all because the show for some reason or another couldn’t be bothered to let us spend any time with them to care. The waste of Scorpia and Mermista especially (to people named Jet Wolf who are me) was fucking CRIMINAL. Speaking of Scorpia, wouldn’t her showdown with Bo have been so much more poignant if they’d had really any kind of interaction before that moment to build from? (Sure, it’s Scorpia, so if you’re going to sell the lack of context with anyone it’s her, BUT ALSO.) Hey, remember Huntara? No? NEITHER DID THE SHOW.

All my details aside though, MY MANY MANY MANY DETAILS, what kills/rages me most about She-Ra was how so much potential from the first four seasons was just flushed away. Whether it was the creative team shooting itself in the foot or corporate pressure and rushing from Netflix, I don’t know. I don’t CARE. This is the show I was given, so this is the show I have, and that kind of fall after that kind of potential doesn’t just irritate me, it makes me SAD. I wouldn’t be this disappointed if I didn’t think it could have been -- WAS -- so much more.

Time will tell if I can separate out the final season from how much I loved those that came before it. I like to hope so, because I did love it intensely and loved whenever I got the chance to really dig in and talk about it.

WHATEVER ELSE I SUPPOSE I WILL ALWAYS HAVE THIS

Again please remember that I am not at present looking to argue or debate my feelings and opinions. I get to just be angry and disappointed, as a treat!

[haiky-u-lously]

King Kuroo and the Red Knights (9)

Summary:

A Camelot AU where King Arthur is Kuroo Tetsuro, and the Knights of the Roundtable of characters from seasons 1-4 of the HQ anime. Eventual Kuroo X Reader.

Themes:

Action/fighting/killing, dead bodies, Fluff, Angst, Humor, Eventual Romance

Warnings:

Mentions of stalking and abuse of power, Language, Angst in feelings, Gore and fighting, mention of explosion, mention of seeing dead bodies

Word Count:

For Chapter: ~2800words                 

Questions/Comments/Concerns/Ideas welcome as always.

-Admin Red

Hi everyone! First, I’d like to half-apologize for my sudden disappearance from the weekly updates. I say half-apologize because I do feel bad about it, but the first week was supposed to be a break because I’ve had some physical issues come up and it really really hurts to type so I was trying to take a week away from overly stressing my fingers and putting them through more than necessary pain. So like, it was going to be fully justified even though I did feel bad. 

But, after that first weekend without an update I got 7 anon and 2 not-anon asks and 2 direct messages all from individuals basically being hate messages. Regarding how I must be lazy for not keeping my posting up after only two weeks, regarding how the story is crap and they were happy I wasn’t flooding the tags with the b*s anymore. And for how few positive responses I have received regarding the story as a whole after 2 months of posting each week to receive so much after only 1.5 weeks...it was pretty much a punch to the gut.

I realize I am not a top writing for the HQ fandom, I realize that only like...maybe...10 people actually read this story each week, and I am truly grateful to everyone who does. But like that fact that I got so many rude messages as opposed to nice ones really tore me up, especially since in the absence (until yesterday) I hadn’t received any word that anyone was still enjoying the work.

This is why I would like to once again thank the anon who messaged me yesterday. As I said, the kindness you wrote to me made me cry because I’d been so down about this piece. And, I am really glad this work brought you any joy that it did, I hope it continues to do so.

Finally, I have a doctors appointment to get my hands checked out. After basically a month of being in pain with them hopefully something will come of it and I can get back to writing for this work. For now though, here is chapter 9. I hope those following for this piece enjoy it, and honestly if you only wish to send hate please keep it to yourself. Constructive criticism is fine, welcome even (as proven by the fact that I owned up to being wrong about certain characters being third years), but hate messages...those are just pointless.

I hope you like this next installment. Enjoy!

–Admin Red

Chapter 9: Morning of the Tournament

It had been a long few days as the castle staff, knights, and royals of Camelot prepared for the tournament they’d decided to hold. But everyone was in high spirits at breakfast that morning, even Suga and you who’d had a few close calls with your new hall-mate liking to barge in without so much as knocking to indicate his approach.

After the third scare of him walking in while you were eating, you’d started to use your magic to lock the door whenever your helmet was off.

“I still can’t believe how quickly he accepted that you just had (h/l), (h/c) hair when he saw the back of your head,” Suga commented biting into his eggs from his breakfast plate.

You laughed a bit before responding, finishing off your own mouthful of food. “Yea, he is very friendly though. I appreciate how true his comment was. Saying this was the most private hall of the castle? We only come across him regularly, it is pretty nice to be afforded the level of privacy I wanted. Even if there were a few mistakes at the beginning.” You smiled as you went in for more food.

Suga had finished clearing his plate before mouthing to you that he agreed with your assessment.

*knock knock*

When you heard the knocking from your door, rather than the whines of a knight who felt excluded from the so-called party, you knew it was someone other than the King’s right-hand man at your door. Quickly you put your helmet on, still hiding your true identity and removed your magic hold on the door so Suga could open it.

“Excuse me,” Futakuchi called upon entering your chambers. “Ah so you are both here, great! Makes this less work for me then.”

Suga laughed on both of your behalves at the attendant’s joke, having grown accustomed to his sense of humor as it was similar to your own.

“The King has asked me to tell you the order of today’s fights.” He said, pulling a piece of parchment from behind his back with a wide grin.

Suga’s eyes lit up as Futakuchi spoke, and you knew your friend was looking forward to this show of strength as much as any of the men of Camelot, and you smiled proudly behind your face-wear.

When a full minute passed without a word from the magician, Suga threw his hands out in exasperation, “Well then, what is it?”

“Oh, right!” The brunet fumbled the paper before moving to place it on your dining table to review with your pair. “So the first battle will be the most entertaining as the side by side matches should be--!”

His explanation was cut off by the ringing of bells from the courtyard.

“Another attack?” Suga questioned, not knowing the differences in Camelot’s alarm system since you’d heard it less than a handful of times.

Futakuchi shook his head, “No, it means a visitor. But I have no clue who could be approaching today of all days. Come, you should see who it is with me.”

Your group made it down to the front square of the Castle, only to watch as all of the knight’s you’d slowly begun to know over the course of the week run up to a pair of men riding in on horseback!

“You’ve made it!”

“What took you two so long?”

“Where have you been, idiots? The guests of honor arrived a week before you!”

“With Asahi and Ushijima here we are in for a real tournament!”

“Grand welcome for two of Camelot’s strongest! Welcome back to the castle latecomers.”

Watching the group, you realized the men were as close to one another as Suga and you were with your own band of Knights. You were grateful for the reminder of home, even if it made you miss your friends a bit more.

“Ah, so they really did show up today.” You heard from beside you and turned to face the speaker, “Pardon their inept ability to make proper introductions, Red Knight. The two newcomers are the pair I told you about before. Since they have arrived, I may make them participate in the tournament as punishment for being so late.”

You nodded to the King, indicating you’d heard him before stepping back to let him address his men from a better position atop the stairs.

“Thank you,” He smiled fondly before taking your prior position and screaming out to the men below him, “Ushijima! Asahi! Men!” The knights filed up at the base of the staircase, with the two new arrivals front and center. “Why are you so late?”

“Late?” Asahi asked, “You know, you all keep saying we are late, but we just got these summons a few days ago.”

Ushijima just shrugged and looked bored, “If we are supposedly late, we can just go back to where we were.”

The men around the pair started shouting obscenities at their friends’ casualness. You noted the joking manner between the group of twelve and realized that this kingdom truly did feel like they were in a time of peacefulness after the decades of darkness that befell them.

Looking to Suga, you noticed his eyes trained on the men below, joking and horseplaying as he had with his own companions, and you made a note to show how grateful you were to him once more. He’d left his home and friends to stay beside you, the least you could do is remind him how appreciative you were.

“--wever, the matter at fact is that our guests arrived a week before you. To top that, they fought on our side when the castle was attacked without all her guards in place. So I’ve decided you will join our tournament today, and I will not accept any excuses of being tired from your journey.” The King smiled down to his men. The pair grumbled about how unfair a punishment was being forced on them, the other men just showed excitement at the prospect of their friends joining.

“Yes! Yes! Yes! I want to fight Ushi!”

“Hells ya! Make them fight for their dinner while we’re at it!”

“I wouldn’t mind kicking some sense into the glass hearted giant myself!”

“Woaho! Fight time, let’s go!!”

Even the few not shouting out in pure joy had grins on their faces as they looked to and nodded at one another, all of them ready for what they now perceived to be a perfect tournament.

Waving your hand, you caught Suga’s attention, and holding your fingers up to make a triangle, you told him to ask about the tournament set up.

“Excuse us, King Kuroo.” He approached the royal, “This will probably change your line-up for the tournament?”

“You’re right! Futakuchi!” He yelled, to get the attendant’s attention away from joking around with the men below. “Come, we have to rearrange some things.” After his announcement, the King reentered the castle.

As he passed Futakuchi slowed to ask Suga a question, “How against are you showcasing your magic?”

Suga looked to you for your decision. Since showing magic would be the first test against the King’s ability to truly reconnect with the Order you decided it would be a fine move. 

You shrugged your shoulders to indicate you didn’t care either way, leaving it to Suga’s discretion since he too knew of the testing methods.

“If I fight another magician, I don’t mind.” He answered positively.

Futakuchi’s grin overtook his features as he bobbed his head before following after his king.

“You sure like them, don’t you?” You whisper asked your friend.

“Like you don’t?” He laughed back. “If it goes well, perhaps we really can trust this new King and then you can focus on your other mission.”

Behind your shielded mask, you rolled your eyes and stuck out your tongue before answering, “Perhaps you can shut up because no one asked you about that.”

He laughed at your ire, but brought it down to nothing more than a smile seeing the knights climbing the stairs.

“Oh let me introduce you!” Bokuto yelled excitedly seeing your pair atop the staircase. “Ushijima, Asahi, these are the Red Knight representatives. This is Sugawara, the Knight’s squire, and that...well, we just call him the Red Knight, I’ve seemed to have forgotten his name.” The Knight ended up drawing out his introduction as he racked his brain trying to recall it.

“Oh the Red Knight doesn’t mind, we’ve been doing it all week.” Terushima countered, defending his friend’s forgetfulness, and you stifled a laugh as you imagined it was because he too forgot the name you’d chosen to use.

“Wait, you’re Sugawara? From the Order?” A longer haired male asked, stepping from behind the other men to look at your friend closely. After what you guessed was further inspection he grabbed your companion in a tight embrace, “It’s been years! How are you old friend?!” The male shouted in his ears.

You’d moved to unsheath your sword, only to pause at Suga raising his hand towards you.

“It’s okay Yomimasu, I actually think I remember this man.” He finally said once released from the embrace. The taller male backed up and sheepishly scratched at the stubble of hair growing against his jawline. Suga did his own visual study before grinning from ear to ear and giving the man his own version of a soul crushing bear-hug. “Azumane, goor sir. It’s been a long while. Glad to see you’re still alive!”

Hearing the name Suga called, memories flooded your mind of Suga’s friend from the summer years back. A traveling group stayed in a town near your own and the pair met in the forest when Suga was searching for you. After enticing the over-grown child’s help, Suga made fast friends with the boy. Sneaking off himself to go teach him some sword fighting skills and some of the things you’d taught him as well.

“Wait!” Semi interrupted your thoughts and the pair’s reunion. “You two know each other?”

Suga nodded, and Asahi moved to explain, “I stayed a summer nearby to where Suga lived when I was a child. He was the one who taught me to use swords, and his cousin taught us both how to write. Thought I’d never see them again, honestly. What are you doing in Camelot?”

Being questioned, Suga fell back into his more reserved mannerisms, “Of course, I am here as escort to the Red Knight as the Order has sent us to determine if Camelot is worthy of being considered an ally once more.”

The official reason for your visit.

It still angered you that it was your only excuse, that you weren’t meant to share your other reasons. But things were the way they were, and thus you stayed silent, watching the encounter from the sidelines.

“What are you doing as a knight of Camelot? I thought only those in some roundabout way related to the King’s lineage were accepted as knights?” Suga questioned.

“Oh, Kuroo did away with that rule long before he even became King. Quoting about how men should be fighter’s by their merit not their bloodlines.” Yamagata informed your pair.

Aone got a disgusted look on his face that made you want to laugh out, but you swallowed the feeling, he asked, “Did you think we were all somehow related?”

Suga glanced at you, and you did nothing to indicate your own thoughts of the matter, he sighed in defeat and answered, “Well not recently, but yes I felt your family trees must have connected somewhere down the line to the King’s.”

The group of men before him burst into fits of laughter as they regarded the idea and its apparent absurdity. 

“What of your cousin? How does the Princess fair?” Asahi questioned, changing topics to try and save his friend some embarrassment.

“Cousin?” Daichi guffawed.

“Princess?” Atsumu and Osamu blurted out simultaneously.

Your body went stiff at Asahi’s question and you had to take a few deep breaths to calm yourself and tell your mind that they weren’t actually calling to you.

Suga grinned as if he didn’t have a care in the world as he answered his old friend’s question, “She’s happier than she’s ever been, last time I saw her.”

He turned to reenter the castle, probably to return to your room, but you weren’t sure. You were going to follow him  but stopped dead in your tracks as Bokuto, Satori, Terushima and Atsumu all followed after him, asking so many questions over one another even you couldn’t make any of them out.

“So who are you?” A tall man, with short dark hair turned to you. He felt like he’d probably be more intimidating than Aone, but as you were currently sporting a full suit of armor, and held a secret that none in Camelot, save your own friend, knew, you didn’t actually feel frightened.

Daichi and Iwaizumi both stepped between your figure and the large knight, hands up defensively.

“Actually, Ushijima, while in uniform the Knight cannot speak. It’s a little challenging, but we’ve managed pretty well this past week. It’s easier to ask simple questions.” Daichi informed, and you appreciated the complete switch in the knight’s attitudes since you’d first arrived.

Iwaizumi nodded, “The letter you received should have detailed the purpose of their visit, Futa did a great job explaining everything in ours at least. We did a shite job of first impressions the night they arrived and yet he still helped us defend Camlot’s castle. The Red Knight is good people, trust us on that in the very least.” 

It amazed you how much the male reminded you of your old childhood acquaintance. You wished you’d know the boy better to tell if he was the same man for sure, but alas, only Oikawa would have known...And, it’d been years since you’d seen him either. You felt the tear roll down your cheek before realizing you’d started to cry at the recollection. Closing your eyes you let your mind settle on nothingness to rid it of the negative memories regarding your ex-friend.

“Then perhaps you can answer simple yes or no questions?” The giant, presumably Ushijima questioned you. Upon seeing you nod, he hummed before continuing, “Are you really only here to see if Camelot can reconnect with your Order?”

While you knew how Suga would want you to respond, you also knew it wouldn’t be truthful. It’d been a long week developing trust with the members of Camelot’s court, and you the only way to keep that streak would be to stay honest. You shook your head in the negative.

Ignoring the shocked exclamations of the men around him, your interrogator continued. “Do you wish to bring Camelot or Kuroo harm?”

You stood at attention and shook your head once more, expressing clear displeasure at the mere idea.

The male hummed before bowing out of his inquisition, “I see. I look forward to getting to know you then.”

Watching him move inside the castle, you stayed where you were in anticipation of the other’s questions to follow your first answer.

“Aye, you weren’t being serious in having another motive, were you?” Osamu questioned, looking at you with disbelief dancing in his eyes.

You just bowed your head in apology.

“Does Sugawara know of your other mission?” Daichi questioned further.

You thought for a moment before rocking your hand side-to-side in front of you, telling the knights he kind of knew a bit about it, but entirely.

Semi shook his head and stepped forward, a frown clear on his face as he tried to find your eyes hidden in the shadows of your helmet, “Have you deceived us?”

His voice sounded so angry, almost threateningly so, but you knew you couldn’t answer that question without Suga by your side to explain. Thankfully you didn’t have to.

“Oi!” King Kuroo yelled from one of the windows overlooking the front gate. “Get to the main hall for review of the schedule!”

“In a minute!” Semi yelled back, still looking you up and down distrustingly.

Kuroo didn’t like this attitude in his knight’s defiance and yelled back, “Now!” Then laughed as he added, “Or no supper for any of the knights, Semi!”

The silver haired male tsk’d in annoyance before rushing inside.

“We trust you,” A voice called your attention from watching the others follow after him. “Not sure why it’s such a strong trust, but we do.” Aone looked at you directly, unbeknownst to him catching your eyes’ gaze with ease. “Don’t betray us.”

What could you do but bow in a show of understanding and acceptance. You really didn’t wish to betray them, and should they discover your secret in a manner not befitting your true identity, then the power will lie with them to do with you as they please.

   _______________________________________________

Table of contents:

Chapter 8                                                     Chapter 10

[itsclydebitches]

[1] Hi! I hope you don't mind, but can I ask a sorta uncomfortable question? I wanna ship cloqwork because I like their character dynamic, but at the same time I get uncomfortable because when Qrow enrolled at Beacon (at "the right age," as specified by Raven) he would've been 17 - legally not an adult. Ozpin would've had a disproportionate amount of power over him, both as a legal adult and as his teacher.

Hi, Anon!

I apologize in advance that this response is probably going to be all over the place. I’ve got a lot of thoughts about this and very little ability right now to put them into a cohesive order. So we’re just chucking it all out lol.

First, there’s absolutely no need to apologize for being on anon. That’s what it’s there for! I think tumblr has developed a view of the anonymous option that, on the whole, isn’t particularly useful. In our efforts to call out those who are sending flames/hate under the comfort of anonymity (which you obviously are not), there’s no need for anyone to “prove” themselves by going off of it. You’re using anon because you (justifiably) fear how the fandom might react to these questions. I often use anon because I abandoned my “main” account years ago and dislike sending messages from it. There’s a huge range of reasons why someone might want to be on anon and ultimately it doesn’t matter why we use the tool that’s been provided to us. It’s there, so never feel bad about going anon for any reason :)

Onto the ozqrow! Or yes, onto the cloqwork. I learned “ozqrow” first so it’s pretty embedded in my head, but I agree that “cloqwork” is the more sophisticated of the two ;) Anyway, yes. There are potentially ways that we can view the relationship as unhealthy… with the key word there being potentially. AKA, as headcanons. No, Qrow wouldn’t have been an adult when he entered Beacon, but who’s to say a relationship began then? Some fans might like to imagine that despite the real world issues attached. Others—like you and me—would not. The important thing is that we both have the space to achieve whatever interpretation of the relationship we please. Far as I can tell, Qrow is 37 at the youngest. Four years at Beacon (17-20), 15 years after Summer’s death (35), and then roughly 2 years of in-canon present time (37). Realistically, he’s probably older than that. Based on the relationship dynamics it seems that Tai didn’t date Summer until he broke up with Raven and given Yang’s age compared to Ruby’s, that adds two years. So Qrow is probably around 39. Even that’s assuming that Raven had Yang right after Beacon. If she didn’t we could push the timeline another year or two, putting Qrow in his early 40’s. I lay all this out to demonstrate that… that’s a lot of time. How old “should” Qrow be before he enters a relationship with someone? Obviously that answer differs from individual to individual, but let’s say for the sake of argument that he should be at least 25. That puts him 5 years out of Beacon, potentially older than when Raven had Yang, and roughly 6 years older than most of our main ships right now (Blake/Yang, Jaune/Pyrrha, Ren/Nora etc.) where fans argue very strongly that at 19 they’re already adults and are able to make informed decisions, be it about relationships or world-shattering secrets. So we’re already holding Qrow to stricter standards than other characters and that still leaves roughly 15 years for him and Ozpin to start something, all of which is time that takes place outside of the Teacher/Student dynamic. It’s a choice to prioritize “But he was his headmaster for 4 years” over “But they were equals for 2 decades.”

Now granted, there’s more to this relationship than just Qrow’s own age. I’ve also seen people bring up the age gap and, more recently, Ozpin’s “manipulation” of Qrow. In regards to the former, we simply have to acknowledge that Ozpin is screwed in that regard. Everyone is younger than him. Almost the entire cast. At some point nearly everyone we meet will have, at some point, been a child while Ozpin is an adult simply by virtue of Ozpin being a reincarnating wizard who has already lived at least a thousand years. The only exceptions to this are Salem, the Gods, or Jinn, all of which are more “problematic” partners to my mind. Which again, isn’t to say no one can ship them together, just that it seems ridiculous to me that—if we’re really going to “justify” an in-canon relationship—we’d prioritize “Salem and Ozpin are the same age that’s so much healthier!” over “Salem abused Ozpin, killed their kids, and has hunted him for years on end. That’s... kind of not great!” It’s a matter of what parts of each relationship we choose to emphasize. And ozqrow is far from the only ship to grapple with this. In the witcher fandom I adore both Geralt/Jaskier and Geralt/Regis. Both of those ships have “issues” in regards to age. Is Jaskier not allowed to be with Geralt because he’s in his 30s and Geralt is in his 80s? Is Geralt not allowed to be with Regis because he’s in his 80s and Regis is in his 400s? When we talk about fantasy series we’re talking about species/races/abilities that are, obviously, fantastic. They don’t exist. Which means that real world concerns can’t perfectly map onto these scenarios. The question is not “Is a 1,000 year age gap problematic?” but rather “Are these both consenting adults who are in a position to make their own informed, romantic decisions?” To which we answer for ozqrow: yes. Unless we specifically imagine that the relationship began when Qrow was just a student but again, that’s purely headcanon. Emphasizing that non-canonical imagining of how a relationship might have started over the canonical years of working together as equal peers makes no more sense than going, “Yeah but there was a time when Regis was an adult and Geralt was just a kid, so if they’d met then it would have been super unhealthy so you shouldn’t ship them :/” They didn’t meet when Geralt was a kid. In the same way, Ozpin and Qrow didn’t start a relationship when Qrow was a kid for the simple reason that they have no canonical romance at all. That puts the power entirely in the viewers’ hands to imagine when/how such a relationship occurs. 

Which leaves us with second issue mentioned: power dynamics and Ozpin’s “manipulation.” Take everything said above and apply it to this point too. That power dynamic only exists if we imagine a relationship while they’re headmaster and student. Which you can! Plenty of people want to write/read about such “problematic” stuff. That’s partly what fandom is for. But again, if that’s not your cup of tea there’s no reason to prioritize those 4 years over the 20 years we get later. I have heard some people say that the relationship is indefinitely imbalanced because of Ozpin’s age/power/leadership/whatever but… that simply makes no sense to me. Or rather, it seems hypocritical. Does that mean it’s “problematic” for Weiss to be with Ruby? After all, Ruby is the leader of their team and calls all the shots. What if Weiss feels like she can’t say no to her?? It’s terribly unhealthy. Does that mean Weiss can’t be with Blake? She was racist, after all, and comes from such a place of privilege. I’m not sure Blake is educated enough to hold her own with Weiss. Does this mean Blake can’t be with Yang? Blake comes from a very rich and powerful family whereas Yang is just a country girl… what if Blake uses that power against her somehow? Does that mean that Nora can’t be with Ruby? Or again, Weiss with Ruby? I mean, Nora is homeless and Weiss has been cut off from the Schnee line, so they might stay in a relationship purely out of fear of being abandoned--super unhealthy. These are all revised versions of things I’ve heard applied to ozqrow: Qrow shouldn’t be with Ozpin because Ozpin is his leader (Ruby/Weiss), because Qrow grew up in an “uneducated” tribe whereas Ozpin is clearly so sophisticated (Blake/Weiss), because Ozpin has power and connections that Qrow could never match (Blake/Yang), because Ozpin is tied to the life Qrow has built and breaking up supposedly threatens that. Which means he can’t ever break up. Which means Qrow is trapped. Which means it’s unhealthy (Nora/Ruby or Ruby/Weiss). They’re all warped, assumption based arguments that are only taken seriously when they’re applied to a ship that people are already inclined to dislike. The takeaway is that every relationship has power dynamics and every relationship has the potential to be “problematic.” Literally everyone. Give me any two people and I can spin some yarn about how one holds too much power over the other for the relationship to be healthy. Which isn’t to say that real power dynamics don’t exist that should be avoided (like a teacher/student relationship as you point out), only that fans are inclined to extend that past the point of logic in an effort demonize ships they don’t like. Someone having trauma in their past (which, again, is everyone at this point in the series) is not the same “power dynamic” as an adult grooming a child (which, again again, Ozpin didn’t do). So when we’re left with the acknowledgement that any relationship has the potential to be unhealthy, we have to ask… is it? And the answer is no. As you say, “We all know that canonically Ozpin ISN’T that kind of person.” That’s what trumps every headcanon and negative assumption. I could headcanon/assume that a Weiss/Blake relationship would be horrific because Weiss would be a racist ass to Blake and Blake would only stay with her because she’s determined not to “run away” from something again… but we don’t see evidence for that on screen and it literally never happens. In the same way, some fans like to headcannon/assume that a Qrow/Ozpin relationship would be horrific because Ozpin would use his power over Qrow in various ways… but we don’t see evidence for that on screen and it literally doesn’t happen. 

If anything, post-Volume 6 I’d say there’s more of a potential problem with Qrow being with Ozpin. Meaning yes, as you point out Qrow has a lot of stuff in his past that makes him potentially vulnerable—toxic family environment, drinking problem, etc.—but we learn irrevocably in Volume 6 that so does Ozpin. He was manipulated by the Gods into accepting this “impossible” task. He was in an abusive relationship with Salem and, quite literally, didn’t survive it. He’s lived a thousand years of unimaginable trauma. He arguably was also an alcoholic at one point given the drinking we saw in Jinn’s flashback. He’s been betrayed time and time again by his allies… of which Qrow is a part. Arguably Ozpin has even more vulnerabilities than Qrow but both characters are in a position to hurt one another with those vulnerabilities: Ozpin could play on Qrow’s desire for family and Qrow could play on Ozpin’s need for support. That “could” is, again, important because it’s mostly headcanon speculation that chooses to see the relationship as inevitably negative… with the exception that canonically Qrow is the only one who we see using these vulnerabilities against Ozpin. The fandom likes to assume that Ozpin “manipulated” Qrow all these years but we simply never see that happening. In true RWBY fashion, RT gave Qrow a very damning sounding line—I gave up my life for you—and then let the fandom assume really negative connotations. In reality though what that line translated to was, “You trusted me despite the fact that I entered your school to learn how to kill you and your allies, then taught me how to be a better person and gave me a purpose in life: to help others, even if I’ve now learned I can’t fix it all in one lifetime.” Like yeah, what kind of horrible “manipulation”?? Ozpin’s supposed power over Qrow has only helped and benefited Qrow, despite how Volume 6 tried to paint that relationship as suddenly negative. What is said doesn’t align with what we’ve seen. In contrast, we do see Qrow using Ozpin’s vulnerabilities against him. He does betray him. He does punch him into a tree. He does help perpetuate those same lies to Ironwood. He does absolve Ruby without offering the same to Ozpin. He does then plant the seed—with absolutely no evidence—that he had a hand in Summer’s death. To be frank, Qrow has treated Ozpin like shit lately and it’s one of the (many) reasons why I hate Volume 6 and 7. Ozpin is coded as the perpetrator, but we never see him taking advantage of Qrow. Meanwhile, Qrow is coded as the victim, but we do see him taking advantage of Ozpin’s vulnerability. One character has helped the other flourish, the other has abandoned him in his greatest time of need. Right now I’d argue that the in-canon ship potential is “problematic” due to Qrow… but that doesn’t mean any of that has to impact fandom shipping. For me personally, I prefer to keep to Volume 1-5 material or AUs up until Qrow (hopefully) apologizes for his actions. Then I might feel inclined to write canon-based ozqrow content for Volume 8, or whenever we re-establish that respect (with AU elements involving giving Ozpin his own body. The Oscar situation is a whole other thing I’m not going to delve into here. Suffice to say, I’m considering Qrow and Ozpin as separate people right now). But even if they never make up, even if Qrow, or Ozpin, or both of them end up being completely toxic for one another, that doesn’t stop anyone from imagining something better for them in fandom. Fandom is transformative for a reason.

All of which isn’t to say that people have to like the ship (obviously) only that in the same vein it means that no one has to justify liking the ship either. Again, for me personally, I usually need some in-canon, healthy dynamic to work with in order to enjoy a ship. It’s why I love ozqrow because we did see that for 5 volumes and may indeed see it again. In contrast, it’s why I don’t love pairings like Yen/Geralt or Bakugo/Izuku because I don’t feel like I have a healthy foundation to work from and, for me, a healthy foundation is usually necessary (with some exceptions like my childhood love of Erik/Christine). But all those are preferences. They don’t—and shouldn’t—dictate anyone else’s enjoyment. Which is the problem when people don’t just assume that ozqrow is inherently unhealthy (which I hope I’ve somewhat helped to disprove here) but likewise assume that that’s necessary for anyone else to ship them. For you that potential coding of teacher/student and power dynamics might outweigh otherwise liking their dynamic and that’s fine! That’s a preference! But a preference doesn’t give anyone the right to throw shade at others for enjoying something different. 

Which finally brings me back to the hypocrisy in all this. Ozqrow (and Blake/Yang) are the only ships I’ve come across in this fandom where the fans have to continually “prove” why their ships are valid. Not as potentially canonical relationships, but just as fandom-based ships. Just as fictional preferences we enjoy as a hobby. It says something about the fandom’s bias that we can watch Ilia, on screen, be one of the bad guys, kidnap Blake, try to murder her parents, try to ship her off to her abuser… and despite all this the fandom went, “Oh yeah. I could see them together.” But Ozpin and Qrow, who have supported one another for the vast majority of the series, suddenly need to provide receipts for how healthy their relationship is and if you don’t do a good enough job proving that, it’s cancelled. That’s messed up. None of these ships are “bad.” Ilia/Blake shippers should go wild with that potential! It’s just an issue of comparison and applying different, rigged standards to certain ships. This is a fandom where people ship the heroes with the likes of Cinder, Roman, Raven, Ilia, Salem, Tyrian… tons of killers and would-be killers, characters who have done objectively horrifying things. But it’s when two loving adult men might get together that it’s suddenly too “problematic”? That says more about that bias than it does the ship. For you, anon, if I’ve failed to alleviate those concerns and that coding means ozqrow isn’t really your thing? Great! You can drop the ship, involve yourself only in AUs, or anything in between. That’s how fandom should work. The problem lies not in asking polite questions about how we might interpret a relationship in canon (which as said in the original reblog I greatly enjoy doing!) but rather in some fans’ tendency to demand a moral standard from a ship that none other is held to and then when fans inevitably fail to meet that standard, they’re criticized for daring to like the ship in the first place. Ultimately whether you end up shipping/liking ozqrow is up to you—which is precisely where the power should be. In your hands, not the hands of someone on tumblr trying to make others feel guilty. 

[tellmealovestory]

Love Is All Around

Summary: Bucky surprises you on your favorite holiday Valentine’s Day.

Notes: Also posted on a03. This was difficult for me to write because I really, really don’t like Valentine’s Day, but this idea wouldn’t leave my head until I wrote it down so here it is.

Warnings: Badly written smut, oral (f receiving), sex, unprotected sex, USE PROTECTION, fluff

It was the most wonderful time of the year. No, not Christmas. Valentine’s Day. The holiday that celebrated love in every way. It was the perfect holiday for an incurable romantic such as yourself.

Every store front was decked out in shades of reds and pinks and whites. Dark red hearts with white lace trim taped to store front windows, streamers and balloons, giant teddy bears, hallmark cards, romance was alive and well and it wasn’t just the stores.

Everywhere you went you could see happy couples holding hands, sharing kisses in the middle of sidewalks, in stores. It was beautiful and sweet and heartwarming.

The bakery you worked at was decked out the most. Every cookie was decorated in shades of red or pink and heart shaped. Red velvet cupcakes with cream cheese frosting with little hearts stuck to the top. Heart shaped cakes meant to be shared between lovers piped with pink and red roses, cursive piping with romantic sayings scrolled across the top of each frosting covered cake. Donuts with pink and red and white sprinkles lined the cases.

It was beautiful and wonderful and exciting, but utterly exhausting. Valentine’s Day may have been your favorite holiday, but working at the bakery meant one of the busiest times of the year. It seemed as if everyone in New York was coming in to request special made cakes and cookies and pastries for their loved ones. It meant that at the end of the day your feet were sore, your lower back aching, your eyes heavy with the need for sleep. It also meant that you could barely enjoy the holiday that you loved so much. By the time you were done at work it was all you could do to get home, grab something to eat and fall asleep before starting over the next day.

While you loved your job, loved being able to take ingredients from scratch and make them into something beautiful and edible that had people craving more sometimes you wished you could sit back and enjoy the holidays.

It didn’t help that between the holidays keeping you busy at work and your boyfriend an Avenger trying to schedule time to see him was becoming more and more difficult. Sure, sometimes when work was slow he’d stop in to see you which you always loved. And when the two of you had a day off more often than not you could be found with each other. But between the rush at the bakery and the bad guys not having anyone to love them down on Valentine’s Day the two of you weren’t able to spend your favorite day together.

When he had told you he was going to be away on a mission you had been disappointed. It wasn’t his fault. You knew what his job had been and what the risks were when you had started to see him, but you had still been bummed out, you had been looking forward to a nice romantic night in with him. No matter how hard you had tried to hide your disappointment he had seen right through you and had promised to make it up to you, a promise you were looking forward to.

Saying your goodbyes to your coworkers you pushed open the bakery door, listening to the bell jingle overhead as you headed out into the brisk February air of New York. The streets were crowded, couples holding hands, people looking disgruntled at the couples, people shoving and yelling and laughing and taxis and horns honking. After moving to New York the loudness of the city had been jarring, but now you couldn’t imagine being without it. In a strange way all the noise was a comfort to you, it meant you were home.

Tugging your scarf tighter around your neck you glanced up at the darkened sky watching the snowflakes fall. It was pretty and romantic and it made your heart ache knowing that you were about to go home to an empty apartment and spend your favorite holiday by yourself. At least you could comfort yourself with the box of red velvet cupcakes you had brought with you from work and you could comfort yourself with every cheesy romantic movie you could find on the hallmark channel without people making fun of you.

Not making it more than a couple of steps before you heard your phone ringing loudly in your purse you smiled when you saw it was Wanda texting you. The message was brief saying only come over for a girls night? You replied yes. It may not have been the romantic night you envisioned, but it was better than being by yourself.

Something was off as you entered the compound. It was quiet, which wasn’t that unusual when members were away on a mission, but it was still... weird. 

The hairs on the back of your neck stood up and you wondered if you should turn around and leave. What if it was a trap of some sort? Turning around you were about to leave when something caught your eye. Debating if you should go and investigate or leave incase this really was a trap your curiosity got the better of you as you took a tentative step forwards. Grabbing your phone out of your purse just in case your steps were cautious as you moved towards the large kitchen and the piece of paper that was sitting on the middle of the table. 

Your heart picked up speed thumping wildly beneath your chest, your hands were sweating and you were sure your phone and box of cupcakes were about to slip from your hand and drop to the floor. This was how you were going to die, by being the idiot who instead of running when something seemed off going towards it instead. 

There was still time to turn back, but your feet seemed to move on their own and as you reached the table your heart only raced faster, your eyes widening in confusion as you looked up expecting to see Tony telling you this was some elaborate prank. Your eyes reread the note that told you Wanda had run out to get popcorn and to go to Bucky’s room. Again, the sense of something being off washed over you, but again your curiosity got the better of you.

Your phone rang, the noise invading the quiet of the compound had you jumping, a yelp of surprise falling from your lips as the box of cupcakes crashed to the floor. Wincing at the ruined food you swore you were going to pass out the way your heart was thumping beneath your chest. Looking down at your phone you relaxed slightly for the first time since entering the compound when you saw it was another text from Wanda. Your eyebrows furrowed as you reread the message two, three times, your confusion only mounting as you tried to understand the meaning behind your friends words. Follow the note, Y/N.

This was getting weird. Could she see you? 

“Wanda?” You called, feeling dumb when silence greeted you. “If this is some kind of sick joke Tony set you up to it’s not funny!” 

Still nothing but silence. The fear was giving away to anger as you shoved your phone into your purse. Reaching down you grabbed the box of cupcakes not bothering to see the damage you had caused when they had dropped. Your heart was still pounding, warmth of embarrassment and frustration and anger climbing up your neck and cheeks as you stalked towards Bucky’s room. This was ridiculous. You were going to kill Tony. Slowly and painfully you thought.

“This isn’t funny anym-,” you started, your words getting cut off, lodged in the back of your throat. Your eyes widened, your lips parting into an o of shock and surprise when you threw Bucky’s bedroom door open not to find Tony or Wanda or any bad guys, but Bucky standing there.

“Hey, doll,” He said, his lips curling up into a smirk, before laughter tumbled from his lips as you dropped your purse and the box of cupcakes and ran to him, your arms wrapping around his neck. Thanks to his super soldier abilities he caught you easily, his arms wrapping around your waist as he held you tightly to him.

“What are... you’re not supposed to be... Wanda texted me... I don’t understand!” You sputtered, the sight of your boyfriend catching you so off guard you weren’t able to complete a full sentence. Burying your head in his neck you closed your eyes, inhaling the woodsy and leather scent that always seemed to cling to him. The surprise of seeing him, of being in his arms like this was almost too much for you to handle and you could feel tears pooling in your eyes. “Are you really here? This isn’t some joke is it?”

Bucky could hear the quiver in your voice, could feel the salty tears falling from your eyes as they hit his neck. “‘M really here, doll, it’s not a joke,” he murmured, his voice low, his hand coming up to rest on the back of your head.

Pulling back you searched his eyes, part of you still not believing this was real, that he was really standing in front of you like this. Pressing your lips to his you sighed, he tasted like mint. “I don’t understand,” you whispered against his lips.

“You didn’t really think I’d let you celebrate your favorite holiday by yourself did you?” Dropping his hand from the back of your head he brought it up to your face, the pad of his thumb brushing away the few tears that had managed to fall from your eyes.

“But... you had a mission? You said you weren’t going to be back in time? And then Wanda texted? And... where is everyone, Bucky?” You didn’t mean to bombard him with questions, not when you wanted to kiss him, not when you wanted to tell and show him how happy you were he was here, but you were so confused.

“The mission got done earlier than we expected. I uh... had Natasha and Wanda help me out. Wanted to surprise you,” he said, his words laced with a hint of shyness. “They’re out, it’s just us tonight, doll.”

You opened your mouth, closed it, opened it again as you struggled to comprehend what he was saying. “How long have you been back?” You asked, your eyes narrowing in suspicion. Making a mental note to thank Nat and Wanda for this surprise you pressed your lips against his again. The idea of it only being the two of you tonight sent a thrill through your body.

Bucky avoided your gaze not sure how to tell you the truth and when he felt your lips against his he sighed, kissing you back eagerly, it had been too long since he had done this.

“Bucky... how long have you been back for?” You whispered against his lips, your fingers trailing up and down his neck as you pulled back from the kiss.

“Couple days.”

Dropping your hands from around his neck you stepped out of his embrace as you glared at him. No matter how excited you were to see him, no matter how wonderful this surprise had been you weren’t going to let him off the hook. Not after he had been back for a couple days without saying anything to you.

“Excuse me?”

Bucky flinched at the icy tone of your voice. “Doll, let me explain,” he murmured, his voice velvety soft and when he saw your eyes soften he knew he had you. Taking a step towards to you he reached for your hands, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips when you didn’t pull back. “Wanted to surprise you. I know you’ve been stressed with work and I wanted to do somethin’ special for you tonight. ‘M sorry I didn’t tell you I came back early.”

You wanted to be mad at him, but you couldn’t, not when he had taken the time to go to such extreme lengths to make tonight special for you, not when he had enlisted the help of Wanda and Natasha. “Depending on what you have planned I might forgive you,” you teased, a twinkle in your eye.

“Oh, you’ll forgive me,” he said, his voice lowering causing you to shiver in anticipation.

“You sound awfully sure, Bucky.”

He didn’t say anything, his smirk only growing before he pressed his lips to yours. The kiss started out slow and sweet, but it didn’t take long for him to deepen it. A moan spilled from you and just as you were about to reach out for him he was breaking the kiss.

“Take your coat off and wait here. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Dazed from the kiss it took a minute for his words to break through your fog filled mind and once they did you were left staring at his retreating back, a frown on your face as you wondered not for the first time since arriving what it was he was up to.

Following his instructions you unwound your scarf, unzipped your coat and kicked off your shoes. Folding your coat and scarf you placed them on the back of his couch. Crouching down you picked up your purse setting it by your coat before reaching for the box of cupcakes. Opening it up you frowned. Dropping them had resulted in them tipping onto the sides, large swaths of frosting sticking to the roof of the box. While they didn’t look as nice as when you had packed them they were still edible. Sort of.

“What’s in the box?” Bucky asked, his voice jarring you out of your worries over the dessert.

“Cupcakes.” You didn’t miss the way his eyes lit up or the way his tongue licked his lower lip and you couldn’t help giggling. “Red velvet, but I may have dropped the box. Once or twice.”

“They still look good. You made these?”

Nodding your head you held the box out to him watching as he dragged his finger through the cream cheese frosting that littered the top of the box. You wanted to tell him that he didn’t have to lie, you knew they looked like shit now, but when he brought his finger up to his mouth, his tongue darting out to slowly lick the frosting off any coherent thought left your mind.

“Delicious,” he whispered, his eyes roaming over you. Taking the box from you he placed it on the coffee table in front of his couch before grabbing your hand, interweaving your fingers he led you to the bathroom.

The lights in the bathroom were dimmed making the room appear cozy and romantic. The bathtub was filled to the brim with warm water and bubbles and the thought of Bucky dumping bubbles in there had you smiling. Inhaling you could smell the floral scents of roses and lavenders and a hint of vanilla.

“This is...,” you started, your words failing as your eyes drifted from the inviting bath to Bucky’s soft eyes.

“Use your words, doll,” he teased, his fingers grasping the hem of your shirt as he tugged it off of you, tossing it on the floor.

“This is amazing. I can’t believe you did this for me,” you breathed out, fighting the urge to cover yourself. You hadn’t expected him to be home so early so you had opted for something comfortable instead of sexy which left you in an older pink bra with straps that were always falling down and matching underwear. Bucky didn’t seem to care though because as he tugged your pants down you could hear him whispering about how beautiful you looked.

“Course I did this for you. Why wouldn’t I?” He asked, sounding almost offended at your words as his fingers unclasped your bra, sliding the loose straps down your arms before tossing it to the growing pile of clothes.

Shrugging your shoulders you bite your lower lip. “I don’t know. I guess because nobody has ever done something like this for me before. The most I’ve ever gotten for Valentine’s Day was candy... sometimes flowers. Never a surprise like this.” You gestured towards Bucky and the full bath as your fingers tug at the hem of his shirt. He gets the hint, pulling it from his body as you work on pulling his pants down his legs.

Standing in the bathroom, both of you in your underwear, the lights dimmed, you can’t help staring at him. The way his chest rises and falls with each steady breath he takes, the way his blue grey eyes seem to darken with lust as his gaze flickers between your own eyes and your lips. Standing there watching him you can feel your heart swell with love for him. Part of you is still upset that he’s been back for days without telling you, but standing here you can understand why he did it and you love him for it. So much.

Telling him without words you step forward closing the small gap of space, your arms wrap around his neck, your lips move over his in a kiss that starts off sweet before you deepen it.

Bucky rested his hands on your hips, a quiet groan tumbling from him when he feels your lips brushing over his. Almost a month without your touch, without your kisses had left him wanting to rip the last of your clothing off. When he saw you walk into his room earlier, saw the way your eyes lit up when you saw him, watched the way you ran to him excitement radiating off your frame he wanted to take you right there. Wants to take you right now. It would be so easy, but the way you seemed so surprised that someone would want to make this day, your favorite holiday so special has him melting in his love for you.

He’s never felt this way before. Never felt his heart swell when he sees someone, never had his thoughts consumed with one person and only one person. Never knew he could love someone. For so long after hydra he didn’t think he deserved to be loved, didn’t think he was capable of loving someone. Not after all the pain he had inflicted and caused over the years. Not until he met you did he even begin to realize what love meant.

Before you he never gave a second thought to Valentine’s Day. Sure, he knew about it, who didn’t? It was a day meant for lovers, something he was convinced he’d never get to experience. But now that he has you? Now all he wants to do is celebrate this day with you, celebrate it in a way that will make you never forget how much he loves you. You’ve managed to turn him into someone who didn’t care about this day to someone who wishes it was every day. You’ve turned him into a sap and he’s okay with that.

Sliding his hands from your waist down to the back of your thighs he picks you up easily, smiling into the kiss when he feels your gasp of surprise. Bucky lets out a soft groan when your legs wrap around his waist. Unintentionally grinding into you he groans again, the friction, the skin on skin contact almost too much for him, especially when your teeth are nipping at his bottom lip. He has to keep reminding himself to take this slow, but you’re making it incredibly difficult when all he can hear are your breathy little moans against his lips.

Carrying you into his room he places you gently down in the center of his bed. Your hair is spread out across his pillow, your breathing shallow as your chest rises and falls with each shaky breath. You look so beautiful, so fuckin’ beautiful he thinks as he hovers over you, one hand on your hip, the other resting on the pillow by your head. His lips are on yours, moving across your jaw, your cheek, down your neck. The needy little whines that spill from your swollen lips as he works over your neck has him groaning and grinding his hips in search of some kind of friction.

“Bucky, what about the bath?” You sighed, your head tilting to the side to grant him more access. Tangling your hands in his hair your fingers curl around his dark locks, tugging when he begins to suck on your neck. He parts your legs with his thigh as you grind against him, your back arching at the friction.

Grazing his teeth against your neck lightly he pulls back smirking when he sees the dark bruise he left on you. Trailing his lips lower he presses open mouth kisses down your chest before wrapping his lips around a hardened nipple. Digging his fingers into your hip he moans against your nipple enjoying the way your hands alternate between tugging and threading through his hair. “Later,” he mumbled, his warm, wet mouth moving to your other nipple to give it the same treatment.

Raking your fingers through his hair you let out quiet moan, your hips grinding against his thigh again, rougher this time and you can’t help the small smile that curls up your parted lips when you feel him groaning, the vibrations sending a thrill straight to your core. “I missed you, Bucky. So, so much,” you whined, neediness dripping from your voice, but you don’t care, all you care about is the act of his lips worshiping your body.

“Missed you too, Y/N,” Bucky murmured, pulling his lips away from your nipple as he kisses his way down your stomach. Hooking his thumbs into the waistband of your underwear he slowly tugs them down your legs, his darkened lust blown eyes locking on yours as he does so. Tossing your underwear to the floor he dips his head down pressing open mouth kisses along the inside of your right thigh. 

He takes his time allowing his lips to get reacquainted with your body. Ignoring your groans of frustration he smirks up at you watching the way your chest rises and falls as his lips move up higher to where you need him the most. His breath is hot as it fans over your soaking core and though he wants nothing more than to dive right in and taste you he simply presses a chaste kiss against your mound as he moves to the inside of your left thigh peppering your warm skin with more open mouthed kisses.

“Bucky... please,” you begged. Your breathing is heavy and uneven and you don’t know how much longer you can last with his teasing kisses along the insides of your thighs, you need more, you need him to touch you, you need his lips on you. It’s torture and just as you’re about to beg him to do something, to do anything his tongue is diving into your wet folds. You don’t mean to, but your hips thrust up and you want to apologize, but the only sound that comes out of your mouth is an obscenely loud moan and you’re so thankful that the two of you are alone.

The sound of your moans, your breathy gasps, the way his name tumbles from your mouth spurs him on and any pretense of taking this slow, of taking his time with you is forgotten. Setting a punishing pace he slides his tongue in and out of your wet folds, an occasional moan slipping from his mouth as he works over you. The continuous rising motion of your hips as you grind against his face as him smirking. You’re so needy for him, his needy girl. Moving his lips to your clit he alternates between kissing and sucking as he slips a finger into you. Groaning at the way your walls clench around him he easily slips another finger in. You’re so wet and warm and as he grinds his hips against the bed searching for his own form of friction all he can think about is being inside of you.

A month without Bucky made you forget just how talented he was both with his fingers and his mouth. Your eyes are clenched shut, your fingers curled tightly around his locks and for a moment you’re worried about hurting him, but then you feel his long fingers curling against you as his mouth wraps around your clit and any worries you had vanish. “Oh god Bucky don’t stop,” you cried out.

He can’t help chuckling against you at the sound of your needy cries. Slipping a third finger into you he sucks on your clit, groaning when he feels your hands tugging on his hair again. He swears you’re going to pull his hair out by the roots, but, fuck he doesn’t even care right now. You taste so good, so fuckin’ good and he almost regrets not telling you he came home early. His metal hand slides up your stomach, up your chest to cup your breast. Massaging you roughly he tugs on your hardened nipple, smirking when he hears the whines that he pulls from you.

The contrast of his cold metal hand against the warmth of your breast and the way his lips are wrapped around your clit and the way his fingers are curling inside of you hitting that one spot is too much for you. Everything is too much right now and as you clench around his fingers you let out a strangled moan, your back arching off the bed. 

“Bucky... Bucky I’m coming,” you moaned, your legs shaking, your heart pounding, a string of incoherent mumbles and whines and moans spilling from your lips as your orgasm wracks your body, your release drenching his fingers and his mouth.

Removing his lips from your clit he keeps his fingers inside of you as he kisses his way back up your body. His fingers curl against you, your walls clenching around him again and he knows it won’t take much to get you to reach your peak again. His hand massages your breast as he slips his fingers out of you slowly, his thumb rubbing circles over your clit as his lips meet yours in a deep kiss.

You can taste yourself on him, but you don’t care as you push your tongue into his mouth deepening the kiss. You’re so sensitive and though part of you wants to push his hand away from your clit you can’t, not when his thumb is moving a little faster and it feels so good, so much better than using your own fingers.

 “Bucky,” you moaned against his lips, your breath heavy and shallow. Nipping at his lower lip with your teeth you tilt your head back, whining softly.

His lips are everywhere, pressing kisses against your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, your throat, your neck, your ear. 

“You gonna come again, doll?” He whispered, his voice raspy, his thumb moving faster. “Come on, be my good girl and come for me. Show me how much you missed me.”

Nodding your head yes his words are all it takes for you to reach your second release of the night. Through the foggy haze of your release you can vaguely hear him murmuring good girl and those two words have you whining again. Guiding his lips back to yours you kiss him deeply.

“You okay?” He asked, his voice soft when he finally pulls back from the kiss.

“More than okay,” you breathed, your fingers hooking in the waistband of his boxers as you tug them down his legs. Chuckling he gets the hint as he pulls them off the rest of the way tossing them to the floor. Even though he’s brought you over the edge twice now you’re needy tonight and all you can think about is having him inside of you.

“Am I forgiven yet, doll?” He asked, his voice teasing as he repositions himself between your legs.

“Maybe.” Hitching your leg around his hip you sigh when you feel his tip pressing against your entrance.

He doesn’t say anything, his words getting stuck in the back of his throat as he pushes into you slowly. All he can think about is how wet and tight and warm you are. Giving you a minute to adjust he watches your face, watches the way your lips part, the way your head tilts back against his pillow, the way you’re fighting to keep your eyes open and on his as he pushes into you before bottoming out. 

The loving look reflected in his eyes as he stares down at you along with his slow pace has you melting underneath him. It’s everything you thought sex on Valentine’s Day should be; romantic and loving. You want nothing more than to keep your gaze locked on his, to keep staring into his eyes for the rest of the night, but as he bottoms out your eyes flutter shut, the pleasure mixed with slight pain too much for you. The stretch is only slightly uncomfortable as you adjust to him, but after a minute you’re more than ready.

 “Oh,” you sighed.

Licking his bottom lip he continues watching you, mesmerized both by the way you look so beautiful, but also by the quiet sounds of pleasure that you let out. Brushing his lips over yours he reaches for your hands, gently pinning them above your head as he interlaces your fingers together.

“I love you, Y/N,” he murmured, his lips pressing a kiss to the corner of your mouth before working them across your jaw and down your neck. His pace is slow, his thrusts even and deep and on any other night the pace would be torture for him, for you too, but you seem more than content to keep things slow and loving and sweet.

“I love you too, Bucky, so much,” you moaned, your head tilting to the side as you gently squeeze his hands. 

Though you miss being able to run your fingers through his hair, miss being able to tug on his hair when he presses against that one spot, you like this, it’s sexy and intimate and perfect. Hitching your other leg around his hip you moan at the new angle as he’s able to push deeper into you. Arching your back you press your hands up against his whining as he sucks gently on your neck. 

“Don’t stop.”

Ever so slowly he picks up the pace of his hips, he can feel your walls clenching around him, can feel your breasts pressing against his chest every time you arch your back, can hear your breathing pick up and it takes all his self control not to slam his hips into yours. He presses a final kiss to your neck before moving his lips back over yours. Untangling his metal hand from yours he slowly slips it between your bodies, his thumb rubbing small circles over your clit.

With one hand free you reach up to cup his cheek, the skin beneath your hand is warm and flushed and as your eyes flutter open you offer him a small smile. You know that neither of you are going to last long, not after so long apart and as you stare into his eyes you commit this moment to memory. The way that he’s staring down at you as if you’re the most important thing in his life. The way his lips are parted, the way that his breathing is uneven, the groans that occasionally tumble from those perfect plump lips. The way his thrusts are deep and slow and oh so perfect for a holiday that celebrates love. The way that a light coat of sweat clings to his forehead. The way that your heart feels like it’s going to burst out of your chest from love for him.

“I love you,” you whispered again, your smile growing when you feel his lips brushing over yours. You don’t think you’ll ever tire of saying those words to him, of hearing him say them back to you. Arching your back as he pushes deep into you you whine against his lips. “I’m so close.” 

"I love you too.” 

His kisses are sweet. The way he’s rubbing your clit in slow, easy circles, the way his hips have picked up the pace, the way his teeth are nipping at your lower lip before swiping his tongue to ease the slight stinging, the way the bed is gently creaking underneath your rocking bodies and the way the headboard rhythmically bangs against the wall has you coming undone beneath him. 

Digging your nails into the back of his neck you break the kiss gasping. His name falls from your lips in a series of breathless chants as your body quivers and shakes beneath his. The pleasure coursing through you is so intense you don’t think you’ll ever climb down from the high.

“Fuck,” Bucky called out pressing his forehead against yours. 

His thrusts are sloppy, but between the sound of you chanting his name and the feeling of your walls tightening around him he doesn’t stand a chance. A couple more thrusts and he’s spilling inside of you with a low moan. Giving your hand a gentle squeeze he unlaces your fingers. Removing his thumb from your clit he kisses you softly, once, twice, three times which has you giggling. Worried about hurting you he slowly pulls out of you, taking note of the way you whine at the loss of him.

Unwrapping your legs from around his hips you sigh at the loss of him, it takes you a minute to gather your senses, your mind still foggy. “I think I forgive you now,” you teased, a twinkle in your eyes.

“I figured when you kept chanting my name,” he shot back, his voice playful as he gets up from the bed. Leaning down he presses a soft kiss to your forehead. “Stay here, ‘M gonna go run you that bath.”

“You’re amazing, you know that?” Letting out a happy sigh you watch as he disappears into the bathroom. Faintly you can hear him moving around, can hear the soft sound of water running and the promise of a hot bath where you can soak your tired muscles has melting into the comfort of his bed allowing your eyes to drift shut for a moment.

You’re not sure how long he’s gone for, but when you hear his footsteps you crack an eye open, a small smile on your lips as you watch him make his way towards you.

“C’mere, doll.” Hooking his hands underneath your knees he picks you up bridal style carrying you into the bathroom as you giggle, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

“You know you could have just said the bath was ready,” you teased.

“And miss the chance to pick you up and hear you laugh?”

Setting you down gently next to the tub you unwrap your arms from his neck watching as he steps into the bath. Extending his hand you accept following his lead as you also step in. The water is hot, the bubbles overflowing and sloshing over the side of the tub landing on the tiled flooring as he lowers himself down into the water. Once again you follow his lead lowering yourself down you sit in between his legs, your back pressed flush against his chest.

The conversation is kept light, the kisses kept sweet and the laughter almost a constant as the two of you bask in each other’s company and the relaxing bath. His movements are slow and loving as he takes extra care to wash you. It isn’t until you start to shiver when the water begins to cool off that he suggests you get out and go back to bed. Helping you out of the tub he wraps you in a soft, fluffy towel drying you off before slipping one of his tee shirts over you. Drying himself off he slips into a pair of boxers.

Though it’s only a short walk back to his room the two of you can’t keep your hands off each other. His hands are on your hips, yours are on his shoulders as he walks you backwards to his room. I love yous are murmured in between sweet kisses and quiet giggles. When your knees hit the edge of his bed he tightens his grip on your hips, his lips pulling back from yours, the loss causing you to sigh.

“Get comfortable, I’ll be back in a minute,” he murmured, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips.

Dropping your hands from his shoulders you do as he asked. Settling yourself back into his bed you pull the sheets around you, smiling as you watch him walking back towards you with the box of ruined cupcakes.

“Have I told you how much I love your cupcakes?”

“Have I told you how amazing you are?”

“Once or twice tonight,” he teased. Climbing into bed next to you he places the box of cupcakes on his lap. Picking one up he hands it to you before grabbing one for himself.

“Then have I told you how perfect tonight was? Seriously, Bucky tonight was everything I wanted and more,” you said softly.

“Ya know, doll, the nights not over yet. We still have a couple hours left to celebrate.”

“What’d you have in mind?”

Plucking the cupcake from your hand he tosses it back into the box ignoring your laughter as he places the box on his nightstand. His lips are yours in an instant as he pulls your body on top of his.

It was definitely a perfect Valentine’s Day and you couldn’t wait to see what he had planned for next years celebration.