#like i would rather know if someone didnt like my gift than just someone pretending to like it to appease me

[cas-coding]

tagvent bc yeah

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 13: ...O-OH?

it’s the night of the big stream. y/n uncovers a strange, albeit deep, bond with charlie. corpse interrupts her garden date with sykkuno quite unceremoniously. tensions are high as ever; proximity chat reveals internal monologues and stray thoughts. y/n’s “batshit insane” energy affects everyone. this is, quite literally, the best game of among us bretman has ever played.

─── corpse husband x reader, sykkuno x reader (if you squint, it’s very one sided)  ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 6.1k oops ─── ❥ reqs: sum people requested some interaction w bretman + jealous corpse + flirty sykkuno

author’s note: guys....GUYS WE’RE ON THE 3RD “OH” hope ur excited cus i am!!! this was rly fun to write, but then again, everything is better than writing an essay lmao! this is extremely chaotic and a bit seggsy but like a minuscule bit u wont even notice it i swear xx there’s not much social media in this one, mostly written lol. as always lmk wat u think n thank u for all ur kind words n sooo manyyyy ideassss!!! love u lots

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous. ҉   next.

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It’s happening, you think, picking the discreet, angelic white color for your astronaut - with a halo and all, truly, you are a seraph that stepped through the gates of heaven and descended onto earth to grace these morals with your presence...quite literally, you’re not only donning white in game, but also in real life, cute as a button or more like as a bunny. Cat girls are overrated - cat boys, on the other hand, you’ll ardently defend till your last breath - but bunny girls...Safe to say, your chat had been going feral. Your endless ego is fed well. You even swore on your heart that no devilish trickery would follow in this game - you had left your snake ways behind you.

No one believed you. The Roaches know you too fucking well.

The influx of new subs, however, do not. Look at this cute girl! She wouldn’t hurt a fly! You chuckle at the compliments. At the exact same moment, Rae pipes up on the discord call, “Y/n is leering and cackling evilly. No one trust her.”

Demon woman herself must be watching your stream before starting her own. You pout, all adorable and innocent, but your eyes gleam slyly. Truly, a mastermind of manipulation! Look at you go! The chat is swooning. The viewer number steadily climbs past 16K and you hum happily, welcoming all that decided to join your little clan, “Don’t listen to Rae. Wifey is mad because I said I’m not bringing her back a souvenir. Well guess what, bitch, I’m the gift.”

Your perfect image does not quite align with your tone, nor the affectionate nickname you call your roommate (bitch, not wifey). The new viewers are none the wiser though, just like your new stream mates.

There is laughter from people you don’t quite know. The lobby is almost full, but not everyone has trickled in yet.

“Filing divorce papers right now.” Rae mumbles, but you hear the smile in her voice. It makes you crack a grin, too. 

More hello’s and shy introductions to the people in the lobby. Sykkuno’s green astronaut pops in with a upbeat, “Hey, everyone! Hi, Y/n!” as his character circles around yours. A collective awww echoes in your stream chat as you, quite breathless at the wholesomeness, reply with a “Hi! Hi hi!” as well.

Corpse is next to join, mysteriously ominous. The discord call is pure chaos, everyone screaming over the other variations of his name while stressing different syllables. Silent as a grave, he just stands there, his black astronaut seemingly eyeing everyone in the lobby. 

Alas, when the noise dies down, he utters, “Whaddup, baby.” and it’s pandemonium all over again. You are screeching/laughing along with the rest. His astronaut swiftly glides to Sykkuno, still circling around you, “Hey, Sykkuno.” He says. The latter abruptly stops. The game hasn’t even started, and already - betrayal! Sykkuno starts circling around Corpse now, leaving you in the dust.

“Hey, dude!”

“Yo,” You interrupt, “I’m like here too, yeah?”

“Fight, fight, fight!” Pokimane jeers. You can’t see her, but you’re certain she’s pumping her fists in the air. 

“Let’s leave the bloodshed for the game, yeah?” Dream offers past her laugh ridden urging.

“No, fuck that, let’s start this shit right now,” Charlie declares - his monotone is strangely pleasant to the ear, and you lean back in your chair with a thoughtful hum. Something about his energy just clicks with yours instantly, but perhaps you’re judging too quickly- “Got my fucking knife ready to slit some throats. You can all pretend you aren’t ready to kill on sight, but that’s not me. I’ll teabag your dead fucking body.”

-yeah, no, your initial estimate had been correct! What a pleasant surprise, you feel like you and he will get along beautifully. 

“Way to be subtle, Charles.” Rae snorts.

“Subtle doesn’t make an interesting game, Rae,” He’s quick to bite back, “and if I’m Impostor, you bet your fucking ass I’m going after you first.”

“Noooooo!” She shrieks, rushing to your astronaut, which is still just standing there, abandoned, like the equivalent of that one emoji, “Y/n, protect me.”

“Of course, baby.” You purr. 

There’s mumbling in the discord call, though it’s barely audible. Corpse seems to be repeating the word to himself: Baby...Baby?...Baby...

“You’re gonna stab me in the back the first chance you get, won’t you?” She questions, already painfully aware of the answer.

“You know it!”

“Finally, someone that’s not fucking cowering in their boots and flaunting their real nature.” Charlie says, “Y/n, form a Big Dick Alliance with me.”

“Oh for sure, man.” You agree immediately, trailing to his in game figure, “Let’s show these virgins how it’s done.”

“This is going to be a mess, isn’t it?” Sean’s voice rings with a cheerful laugh, making you flustered. Yes, you’re actually playing with THE JacksepticeyeTM. You still haven’t fully wrapped your head around that part, “I’m very excited to see where this will go.”

“Nowhere good.” You say with unparalleled sincerity - every word you speak to him, the icon, the legend, the one of the few youtubers you actually actively follow, must be genuine. You doubt you can lie to him. He’s too good of a person. You admire him too much. Stuck between wanting to be a shady bitch and an absolute saint, you refrain from addressing him more - you are simply not worthy.

its the y/n trying to act like a normal person in front of jack for me

ikr she looks ready to join the monastery

each day we stray closer to gods light???

Your viewers are snide as always. Gosh, you love them.

The last player pops in, fashionably late, “Hey, y’all.”

“Hey, Bretman!” The call choruses somewhat harmoniously.

“Hi, daddy.” He’s speaking to Corpse now, a smile in his voice - you can hear it even past the static of his atrocious mic. Your eyes widen, eyebrows shooting up. Your friends are cackling, but confusion refrains you from doing the same - were you not the only one Corpse offered, seemingly so long ago!, to be his sugar baby? 

One betrayal after the other. You’re glad for the Big Dick Alliance. The name has a nice right to it, too. 

Corpse laughs, “...Hey, Bretman. How are you today?”

Damn, two sentences for him, but not even a word spoken to you!? You’re already scripting a very melodramatic paragraph you will text him after the stream. With poorly masked discontent, you mutter, “Wow, thanks for such a warm welcome, Corpse, my day’s going great, yeah, loving the company.”

“Now now miss girl,” Bretman chimes, “we can’t be all daddy’s favorite.”

“Careful,” Charlie drones, “I think you just got yourself onto Y/n’s shit list.”

“Right next to Corpse Husband and Valkyrae.” You agree, “Sykkuno!” You suddenly call him.

“Uhm-Uh-Yes?” Is his nervous reply.

“You’re safe.” You state coldly, “For now.”

“You are not going after Sykkuno on my watch.” It must be a belated holiday miracle because Corpse finally decides to address you. His words seem to awake something in him, “Hey-Hey-Hey-” He swiftly glides to you, standing right next to your minute virtuous angel, “When are you coming back to Cali?”

corpse stop acting weird challenge

literally omg lmao

he does bring up a good point y/n y u not in cali yet?!

^pack it up corpse simp he disrespected the queen when he didnt say hi

“Back off, buddy,” Charlie interjects, “this spot is for Big Dick Alliance members only.”

“I’m never returning.” You inform him, your voice cold like the Arctic snow, and the look in your eyes is no kinder. You feel like you’re having a stare down through screen. 

Silence stretches. Is this an intimidation tactic? Because if it is, it’s a paltry one. Your conviction to be petty is stronger than any vulnerability you might feel.

“Then I have nothing to say to you.” He admits and fucks right off with that. Fine, go join Sykkuno and Rae in their little corner of betrayal! Friendship ended with Corpse, now Charlie is your best friend.

“Okay, guys, guys, guys-” Toast, noting this is going to spiral any minute now, tries to catch their attention, “Let’s start?!”

You look into your camera, and the roaches know what you’re thinking. You’re twins like that, communicating telepathically. You are taking back your tender promise of not being a conniving bastard. It’s fucking on. You will destroy everyone in your path, starting with the guy you have a stupid crush on - maybe?! Feelings are confusing, you’d rather just not think point blank period.

With no objections from the cast, the counter ticks away seconds and, for the first round, you’re stuck as CREW MATE.

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Charlie is a gift. Truly, you had not expected such a sudden, wonderful relationship to bloom. How have you not known of him sooner?! It’s a crime that you hadn’t spoken to him earlier. You are a 100% certain if you had found him before you started streaming, he would’ve been a big inspiration. 

The two of you do your silly little tasks and curse like sailors, commenting about this and that thanks to proximity chat. You wouldn’t have been able to stand the claustrophobic silence if it was just a normal Among Us game - to think, missing out on all his foully worded quips! It almost springs a tear into your eye. He’s just as unhinged as you.

worried about this dynamic 

its a trainwreck lol i love it plz collab more plz

Caught in a headed discussion in Electrical - TikTok trends, or audios specifically - you defend the app the best you can. Charlie thinks it’s super cringe, and you insist it’s part of the charm as you connect wires.

“I mean, have...-do you know that one audio, the one that goes, like,” You’re spilling your words, heated, frustrated that he’s so dismissive of the app that literally saved 2020, “it goes like, uhm,” You clear your throat, prep your voice - even take a sip of your favorite drink. Drawing the syllables, you try your best to make it drop an octave - it must sound like you’re doing an atrociously bad and nauseatingly scratchy Corpse impression with an extra dramatic flair, “My assssssss, your cockkk, you do the mathhh.”

“Did-Did I just-” You freeze hearing Corpse’s voice, finally done with your task. Charlie is muffling his laughter behind his palm; Corpse’s astronaut stands in the doorway, “What the fuck did I just walk into?” He seems genuinely confused, though a strangely winded. You’re mortified. Your shoulders are shaking. You look at the stream chat but it’s going too fast for you to follow. Manic laughter bubbles in your chest and you squeeze your eyes shut, mouth split into a toothy grin, lowering your head and trying to hide the blush dusting your cheeks.

“Hey? Guys? What the fuck are you talking about?” He questions again.

“Honestly?” Charlie chimes, “No fucking clue. TikTok, I think. Ask Y/n.”

You can’t reply. You’re crying. You cover your face with your palms, muttering a soft oh my god before bursting into a full blow laugh, throwing your head back, the motion accidentally knocking your headphones off.

“Y/n.” Corpse calls you, “Fuck was that?”

You’re howling. Your stomach hurts. There are literal tears in your eyes. You think Charlie might be laughing too, but you can’t really tell over your loud screeching. Hastily fixing your headphones, you wipe away the tears stuck to your lower lashes, heaving, “S-Sorry, I-” You stutter, breaking into another fit of giggles. Corpse patiently waits you to calm down. Catching your breath, you start again with a sniffle, “TikTok, yeah.” You idly fix your hair, trying to bite down a smile, “It’s an audio.”

“What- What kind of videos are you watching?”

“The good kind.” Your reply is instant, merciless, “Also, why are you here? We’re having a BDA meeting, you know.”

“I-I...” He trails off, “I...I heard people talking and...I just came here to check it out, but...I’m regretting it.” There’s a lilt in his voice, and you know he doesn’t regret jack shit. You bet he’s smiling. You wish you could see it.

“Bitch, then leave!” You huff. You aren’t sure what is with him today, and you don’t want to stick around and find out - his playfulness makes your stomach flip at the most inappropriate times! Like when you’re trying to sound threatening. You must retreat posthaste, “No, wait, I’ll do it for you.” You say, brushing past his character. Charlie follows after you.

“Dude, you’re so fucking lucky neither of us are the Impostor because you’d be deader than I’ve been feeling since I was 10.” Your favorite companion comments. Charlie is truly a modern wordsmith. You’re pretty sure you adore him, because you’re nodding your head, so quick to agree with him that even you’re surprised. 

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A meeting is called. You spare a glance at your fallen crew mates. They will be missed. Sean most of all, God, why does heaven always take the good ones?! The game feels emptier without him, even if you really only passed him once on your trek to Cafeteria with Charlie.

You may or may not have been avoiding him, afraid you’d accidentally say something horrible and he would hate you. It’s a silly fear, though a deep one. And with Charlie keeping you company, you had not uttered a single objectively  good, or even coherent, sentence. Your parents can’t watch this stream once it’s uploaded onto your Youtube channel. They know you’re barely keeping it together in most of your videos, but here, now? Yeah, no. Charlie is already hard to listen to on his own for sensitive viewers, and hearing you agree with literally everything he says with your own chaotic ideas? Your dad would stumble into an early grave.

Mom probably wouldn’t mind too much, but you’d have to explain your relationship status again. She is under the assumption that everyone you collab with is your significant other. You’d say it began with Sykkuno, though the exclamation of “Finally! My daughter isn’t pathetically single! We need to celebrate.” had started with Rae. Truly, a scandal.

Speaking of which, Sykkuno is gone, too, but you had time to mourn him already. You found his body roughly ten minutes ago; so torn with the fresh agony of heartbreak, you could not do anything else but cry. It was Charlie, bless his heart, that reported it.

“Someone killed Jack,” You say, voice dripping with venom, “court is now in session. I’m ready to vote the fucker out.”

People speak all at once. Toast roars over them, “ORDER! ODER IN COURT!” as he slams his hand onto his desk repeatedly. That seems to work, though briefly.

“I think it’s Y/n.” Corpse says. You stare at him, hand gripping your heart, mouth falling open in surprise.

flame him

corpse boutta be a corpse fr

beat his ass queen!!!!!

“Pardon my french,” You grumble, “but nani the fuck?!”

“It’s definitely Y/n, I found her and Charlie conspiring in Electrical. Surrealist experience of my fucking life, but it’s definitely her.”

“Dude, we’ve been over this,” Charlie sighs, shushing Rae who was about to comment something - knowing your luck, it was probably in favor of the man throwing you under the bus, “we would’ve snapped your fucking neck the moment you walked in. But we didn’t.”

“Yeah, we didn’t.” Corpse notes, “I said nothing about you, I’m just saying it’s definitely her. She probably didn’t kill in front of you because of your stupid alliance-”

“Someone sounds salty because he wasn’t invited.” Pokimane snickers.

“-or possibly she did tell you and you won’t betray her for the exact same reason.”

“That’s some big brain logic you pulled there, genius,” Charlie says, absolutely unimpressed, “sure you didn’t have an aneurysm trying to connect all of that together?”

“Well,” Rae pipes up, “Y/n and Charlie did say they will kill right before the game started. If you ask me, it’s not unbelievable. And Sykkuno was sorta on the shit list.”

“I’m writing down your name twice, Rachell.” You spit.

“Not helping your case at all, Y/n...” Dream worries, “And Rae makes a good point. Charlie and you have professed desire for murder. I’m just saying! It’s a bit suspicious, you know?”

The next words to leave Corpse’s lips sound incredibly smug, “See?” He drawls.  The pressure is getting to you - you don’t understand where this beguiling talent of his to convince literally everyone comes from, but it doesn’t inspire any confidence. Your fist suddenly feels incredibly lonely, so useless - oh, how you long to swing at him, “It’s definitely Y/n.”

“I dunno...” Toast mumbles.

“It’s Y/n.”

“Corpse-” You try, but he's ignoring you - shocker, as if he hadn’t been doing that from the very start of this stupid game - and chanting your name like it’s a fucking mantra or something, a smile in his voice, knowing, relishing in the fact that he’s grating on your nerves, “FIRST OF ALL,” You scream into the mic, successfully cutting him off; catching your breath, you exhale, and continue, calmly, lowly,  “get my pretty name out of your mouth.” 

There’s a pause full of tense silence. 

Then, there’s a sound, seemingly stuck in the back of his throat, “...O-Oh...?”

“Second of all,” You continue, words like honey dipped in arsenic, “This is the clearest smear campaign I have ever witnessed. By how hard you’re trying to frame me for fuck knows what reason, I’m led to believe it’s you that killed them. You’re the Impostor.”

“Corpse wouldn’t kill Sykkuno, though.” Rae comments, skeptical.

“Then the other Impostor did it.” You counter.

“Maybe you’re both Impostors.” Pokimane chirps.

“Y/n would never betray the Big Dick Alliance like that.” Charlie states.

You grin, “Charlie, I literally love you.” 

“Wait hold up now,” Corpse seems to get his bearings together, “what’s this about love I’m hearing?”

“I have none for you, dick.” You snap, flipping him off. Your chat cheers. While he can’t see it, you hope he senses it through the screen, “I officially hate you.”

“No, wait-”

“Boo, Corpse, you suck.” Toast laughs.

“Y/n, please-”

“Let’s all vote for Corpse Husband, okay?” You say it like it’s his full official name with an encouraging smile and multiple soft nods. Sykkuno can’t be here to nod, so you’ll do it for him. You eye the rapidly decreasing timer before clicking on Corpse’s figure and voting for him. The VOTED icon instantly pops up beside your adorable astronaut.

“Baby, I-” It slips past his lips so easily, as if he’s not even thinking about it, like it’s only natural to call you that and a spike of anxiety shoots up, making you glare. It’s only halfhearted. You try your best to ignore the rapid and uncoordinated pulses of your heart. Replace unwanted feelings with anger and hate - works like a charm, every time.

“You are not allowed to call me that.” You hiss. The chat spams snake emojis. 

“Wait-” Bretman chimes, “Hold up, y’all, slow down a minute. Why does Corpse never call me baby?”

“Yeah!” Pokimane agrees, “I want to be baby, too!”

Pokimane may not have been called baby, but you just single-handedly decided her nickname for her - Target 4. Welcome to the shit list, she is officially your public enemy number 1. You aren’t sure why the thought of Corpse ever referring to anyone else as baby makes you sick to your stomach (you actually do know why, but brain no think at the moment), but you wish this whole conversation never happened. You don’t like it.

20 seconds left. More VOTED icons appear by your friends. Corpse is the last one to cast his ballot at, you assume, you, as the rest wait for his quick explanation before everyone (or not) returns to the game, “...Because she’s my baby.”

Goodbye. Life had been sweet, and there was sorrow, though the amount of embarrassment you feel now is worse than when the internet found your cringe worthy high school pictures on your mom’s Facebook. It’s a mixture of dread and excitement - the pleasure of being noticed, cherished even, though anxious from vulnerability. Someone is screaming a very prolonged “WHAAAAT?!”, or maybe multiple people are, you aren’t sure, your ears start to hurt from the loud, conflicting cacophony of voices as you stare blankly at the screen. You received two votes, just like Corpse, Charlie got one, the rest skipped. With no one flung out, you all find yourself back in Cafeteria again.

Baby. My baby? My baby. My baby. The sentence is playing ping-pong in your mind, reverberating louder each time. You’re actually speechless for the first time in your life; your chest hurts, your heart beating so fast your hands start shaking. Had he meant it? Or was this a some joke? Was he trying to get a rise out of you again? You might just go insane from so many questions. My baby. Holy shit, this is a heart attack, this is what a heart attack feels like, dear God, you figured you at least had ten years before you get one!

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First round ends with IMPOSTORS raining victorious. Your sixth sense had been working wonders since, true to you previous estimate, it had been Corpse. His companion was Pokimane. For absolutely no reason what’s so ever, you change her name once more from Target 4 to Target 1. Normally, you’re all for girls supporting girls. Men don’t deserve anything, really, but now you’re so flustered and still reeling from what you are 80% sure was cardiac arrest that you genuinely don’t care about your established morals.

Round two starts without much deliberation. You get CREW MATE again; the game must sense your growing bloodlust, making sure that once you do get IMPOSTOR, you will not hold back. True power is granted to those who are ready and strong enough to wield it. You wait for your moment with bated breath.

Charlie is taken from you too early. The two of you were once again caught in a discussion - God knows about what, Minecraft, hentai, oh! your server! - as you tried to card swipe for the umpteenth time. The lights blew out and you just knew one of you was getting murdered there and then. Charlie’s voice abruptly cut off, and you think a part of you died with him.

It’s a cold meeting; with your new best friend being the first to go, everyone decides to skip. You proclaim you seek vengeance. When the meeting comes to an end, Sykkuno is the first to offer his condolences.

“I’m sorry, Y/n.” He says, and while he’s not in Brooklyn, you somehow feel him patting your back. You feign a sniffle.

“There’s nothing to apologize for...” You murmur sadly, “Unless...” Your voice turns sharp as the knife that was surely twisted into Charlie’s back, “It was you?”

“NO!” He exclaims, “I would never-you gotta believe me! I would never kill him. I know he’s important to you. I wouldn’t do that, I swear.”

“He was like a brother to me.” You admit, solemn, “Charlie, if you’re haunting me right now, know I will avenge you. I will not let this go.”

Sykkuno hums, circling around you, “Hey, I have a task in Greenhouse. Would you, uh--Would like to, uhm, join me?” Despite the shaky start, he finishes on a firm, pleasant note. He’s trying to cheer you up. Having lost your closest friend, he’s offering you his company. You accept with a soft smile and a cute “Yes, please!” and he releases an airy little laugh. The two of you make your way to your favorite place in map MIRA.

It’s difficult to stay sad for long when Sykkuno’s so sweet; the atmosphere of the Greenhouse is strangely calming; your problems seem to be left behind the shut doors. If you tried hard enough, you could imagine being in an actual Greenhouse - the warm, damp air clinging to your skin, the unmistakable smell of earth and vegetation, the pleasant silence broken only by yours and his hushed voices and clumsy footsteps.

The two of you are talking. Mainly about your choice of attire. Cat first, Sykkuno ponders aloud, doing his task as you watch the plants grow, now bunny, what’s next? You affirm that you will most likely dress up in cow-print next, or as an adorable sheep. He laughs, admitting you’ll look good in anything before he trails off. His awkwardness is really endearing. 

“Or!” You chirp happily, content with being locked away with him for the whole game. The idea must be playing in his mind, too, because he seems in no rush to leave, “I could, like, dress as someone from My Hero Academia. I watched the stream you did with Stella, the one where she made you look like Todoroki. It was really cute. You were really cute.”

“Oh, uhm-well, uh, thank you, thanks, I, uhm-” He clears his throat, and despite his stutter, you hear the smile in his voice, “I-I think you’d look better, though. Not as Todoroki. Or, probably as Todoroki, too. But, uhm, what character are you thinking about?”

“Maybe Momo?”

“Momo!” He yeps, “Momo is good. Yeah, she’s great. You’ll-uhm-you’ll look amazing. Really. Momo is awesome. Very pretty. Just like you.”

You are blushing. A stupid, toothy grin makes your cheeks hurt. Your eyes flicker to the chat, but again, it’s going wild. Giggling, you thank him for his sweet words, so giddy it’s honestly embarrassing. Why can’t you stop smiling? This is incriminating. You hide your lips behind your palm.

“...What’s this?” Corpse question. You had failed to note his sudden appearance, too busy gushing. “Am I interrupting?”

“Hey, Corpse!” Sykkuno greets. For someone so awkward and shy, he sure is good at hiding it when he wants to. Perhaps it’s all an act and you had been deviously tricked! Probably not, but you can’t help but narrow your eyes suspiciously, finally able to calm down. You definitely underestimated him, you just haven’t figured out how yet, “Not really! Y/n was sad Charlie died so I took her here.”

“You interrupted our date, dipshit.” You deadpan. 

“...Fuck you say?” Corpse dares, his voice low and somewhat menacing - for someone who exclusively portrays his emotions through only his voice, he’s incredibly hard to read. This is payback. Your love for wreaking havoc resurfaces suddenly. Serves him right for pulling all this ignoring shit at the start. Maybe you’ll make him say oh again.

Your sly smirk is promptly wiped. Fuck. He said oh, he literally said oh out loud. The Teruhashi fangirl in you is screaming. You had been so caught up in defending yourself you didn’t even register it at first. Alarmed, you look at the camera, then at the chat. First oh, then my baby. There’s no way he had been teasing you, and this proves it. Holy shit. You mouth the words “HE SAID OH!” for your audience only.

now she notices

snail pace baby we’ve been loosing our shit for the past hour 

corpse x y/n saikik au enemies to lovers 500k words slow burn im here for it

opening wattpad rn^

Your heart races in your chest - it might be considered an Olympic medalist at this point; flustered yet again, you wish you could cave into yourself. You should’ve brought your bright blue wig with you to Brooklyn. Turns out it would have been perfect for this stream. Yes, yes thinking about unnecessary details always works in distracting you from the butterflies throwing a fucking rave in your stomach. 

“I guess it is a date!” Sykkuno admits, “Kinda after a funeral, but still.”

Corpse hums. You’re still too stunned to say anything. The black astronaut with adorable cat ears approaches Sykkuno. 

“It’s not.” He states. Your mouth falls open in shock as your date, your companion, the Shoto to your Momo is murdered in cold blood right in front of you. His lifeless body, cut in half, lays on the tiles by the growing flowers, right beside you, “You didn’t see shit.”

“...I didn’t see shit.” Is all you can utter, breathless and terrified.

“Thaaaat’s fucking right, baby.” Corpse coos, “Now I’m gonna report it, and I’ll say we found Sykkuno together. Better stick close to me after the meeting, got it?”

If Sykkuno is Shoto, then Corpse is definitely Dabi. 

why is that kinda hot tho omg

didn’t know i needed dom corpse since now but i do

y/n looks like shes boutta throw up lmao 

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You follow him around like a lost puppy - because what else is left for you to do!? You’re helpless in this situation. He’s got you in the palm of his hand, successfully eliminating everyone you had previously interacted with. First it was Charlie, then Sykkuno, even Sean, who said hello in passing, was shot instantly. Real Sangwoo behavior. You almost want to scream warnings at everyone to not approach you. You cannot mourn another lost crew mate, you don’t think your conscience can take it. But words fail to form. You’re too weak. You fake cry to your audience. They’re quick to remind you to stop acting like a little bitch.

“Mean.” Is all you say, eyeing the comments.

“Hm?”

“Was talking to the roaches.”

“What are they saying?”

“That I should betray you.”

“...Better not.”

A shiver shoots up your spine and you half believe he will bust down your door and drag you into his basement for real. A nervous laugh slips past your lips, “I won’t, I won’t.” You reassure him, “Don’t worry, I’m sticking with you. I haven’t seen shit.”

“I like that you listen to me. You always this agreeable?”

“You’re kinda not giving me a choice right now.” You grumble, vending yourself a drink while he looms behind you, protecting you. From who?! Himself?!

“Oh my fucking God, finally,” Bretman exclaims, “girl, I’ve been running around the whole map trynna find someone, is everyone like, dead?”

You’re scared to reply. Corpse does it for you, “Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, maybe? Not sure. Where have you been?”

“Oh you know,” Bretman grins, “doing tasks, talking shit, the usual. You two are not, like, Impostors right?”

You shoot a look at Corpse, but he obviously can’t see it. Biting your lip, you murmur, “Nope.”

“Just your regular crew mates doing regular crew mate things.” Corpse says, no, purrs. Because that’s not suspicious at all. You’d recommend Bretman to run, and not only because that sounded shady as fuck. But he seems to enjoy danger, or he just doesn’t care.

“Hmmmm, crew mates, sure. Miss girl Y/n,” He’s addressing you now; you smile anxiously, “How come every time I see you, you’re with a different man?! Like damn, leave some for the rest of us, for real!”

You like Bretman. You like his high-pitched whine and drawl. You would like him even more if not for the complex situation at hand. You fear for his life. Chewing at your bottom lip, you snicker, “Sorry, Bret. I can leave you Corpse if you want?”

He laughs, “Girl, I’d say yes so fucking quick, but I know he wouldn’t want that. Normally I wouldn’t care, but y’all are such a cute couple it’s making me not want to be a shady motherfucking bitch. Changing my ways, embracing the lord. Love it.”

 Corpse doesn’t correct him that you are, in fact, not dating. His lack of reaction unnerves you slightly. Does he...? No! No think! Only exist! You catch that train of thought and steer it away from forbidden territory. Looks like it’s up to you to clear the air, and that is exactly what you do after trying to swallow down the lump in your throat, “Uh, we’re not together, actually. We’re just really good friends.”

“Bitch, then move over,” Bretman says snappily,”go like, back to your other boyfriends. Or find another one. I think I saw Dream near Navigation.”

“Near Navigation, huh?” Corpse hums thoughtfully. It’s a subtle warning, but you catch it. Yeah, even if you try running, Dream’s going to join your other ‘boyfriends’ in the afterlife. Granted, killing someone by just talking with them is kind of cool. Or maybe Stockholm Syndrome is finally kicking in, “Bret, the thing is, Y/n’s scared of dying, so she asked me to stay with her.”

It’s disturbing how good at lying he is. It is also really really attractive, as bizarre as that is.

y/n stop being in a toxic relationship with corpse challenge

making fanart of this omg her face

its the blushing for me girl get your head outta the gutter!

^she cant, it lives there

“Baby, you’re gonna fucking die if you stick with her,” Bretman points out, “have you noticed the mortality rate of her partners? Rest in peace, daddy.”

“He’s right, you know.” You mutter, dramatically looking to the side, “I’m no good, Corpse.”

“Not leaving you, end of discussion. Bretman, join us?” Corpse offers, catching you by surprise. He might still be lying, though. Creating a false sense of security before eliminating Bretman. Probably would laugh while doing it, too. Wow, he truly is evil.

Turns out he doesn’t have to do any of that, because when Dream strolls into Cafeteria, he kills Bretman instead. The two Impostors are finally revealed. You promised not to snitch on Corpse, but you didn’t say shit about not exposing Dream. You press the REPORT button and say just that: “Dream just murdered Bret right in front of me and Corpse.”

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The last meeting is called. Dream had been voted out with the help of Corpse, and now only you, he, and Rae remain.

“Baby, you know what to do.”

The VOTED icon pops up beside Corpse’s astronaut. Rae wheezes, “No! Y/n, it’s not me, you gotta believe me, I swear it’s not me!”

“...I really don’t know,” You murmur, “I’ve been with Corpse a lot, and...Rae, I’m not sure...”

“Please! I swear it on my Kagayama cardboard cut out, I’m not the Impostor, please! You know me, I’d never lie to you like this.”

“She’s definitely lying.” Corpse says, sounding pleased.

“Don’t listen to him! Remember, during the first round, when he tried to convince us that you were the Impostor? He’s doing the same shit to me!”

“I also remember you agreeing with him.” You remind her.

“I was stupid! Small dumb brain moment! He was using us to win! He’s using you right now!” She votes, “Please, Y/n, make the right choice.”

You’re silent for a moment.

“I’m gonna...I’m gonna vote for who I think it is.” You lastly say.

A slow, lazy grin makes it’s way onto your lips, eyes gleaming mischievously. You had not forgotten your promise to your brother from another mother, you had not forgotten the pride of the BDA, you had not forgotten your beautiful friendship. Two miniature astronauts pop up by Corpse’s at the exact moment Rae screeches “YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!”

“Fuck.” Is all Corpse says with a laugh.

The screen changes, informing of the first CREW MATE victory.

Your ears are assaulted with different voices as you appear in the lobby.

“Now that’s what I’m fucking talking about.” Charlie raves, “I swear to fucking God, Y/n, you even got me going for a second. Pulled some 1000 IQ shit right there. It was fucking amazing. Best back stabbing I’ve seen in a while, and I’ve seen a lot.”

“That was absolutely fantastic, Y/n.” Sean applauds, “I really thought you joined Corpse like some crew mate accomplice or something. Can’t believe you switched on him at the last second.”

“That’s my wifey!” Rae cheers, strolling to you, “Love you, mwah.”

“Hey, Corpse,” Charlie calls him, “How does it feel to be a fucking loser?”

“I’m surprisingly fine with it.”

yeah he would be lmao

mom is the best snake ever i love you sm y/n

rae and y/n’s friendship....the feeeeeels

As the rest sing your praises for another solid minute or two, the third round begins. CREW MATE again. Though, just because you’re stuck as an underpaid worker in a dying spaceship, it doesn’t mean you’re innocent. Your last round proved that quite well. You can’t help but silently snicker.

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TAGLIST IS CLOSED!

tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @bingusmode - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury--moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

[aquarii-writes]

Dsmp Headcanons

So ngl I've been really into the dream smp recently and I've been doing a bit of art for it so why not give my headcanons? Also all of these are for the characters not the content creators

Notes: the song referenced in Karl's headcanons is seasonal feathers music box version. This is all I have for now. I’ve lurked around the fandom since about early February and beware this is fucking long

WARNINGS: In some of these I do mention dead parents(various), death in general and as an entity(Philza), alcoholism(Schlatt), and traumatic experiences. None are in detail but just beware. Oh and a slight suicide warning for Dream

DREAM

Dream got his mask from his father and Drista got hers from their mother

His mask is specifically a gift from his mother after his father died

Dreams mask is infused with dreamons. His parents made a deal with a few dreamons and the dreamons now live in the masks

He will never say what his eye color is because he doesnt care, but if you can catch him without the mask you'll see his eyes are an amber color

He watched his mother commit when he was about 12~ and when Drista was 6. At the time he didnt want to understand why

WILBUR SOOT(plus Ghostbur)

Wilbur's mother is a fox hybrid(cause ya know I live by the saying that canon is my sandbox and a fuckin fridge doesnt make sense)(Momza anyone?)

His beanie is from his mother along with his love of singing

He has records of his parents singing

He has wings it's just that he never learned to fly

Ghostbur can see various other ghosts he just doesnt realize that no one else can see them

Ghostbur has selective amnesia. He genuinely cant remember parts of his life but some moments are too vivid to forget

FOOLISH GAMERS

He can partially shapeshift to make himself bigger or smaller(23 fuckin feet tall without changing height)

His son, Foolish jr, is biologically his and Jr is a demigod

Jr is too small to see the world yet so Foolish keeps him in an enderchest

Foolish is fully a god

He really likes turtles no damn reason

Aside from keeping his son in a chest, Foolish is a relatively good dad

He's a very good builder and rarely takes time to sleep when hes working on a commission for someone

He is most certainly strong enough to break the egg though he doesnt want to get involved for his sons sake

SAPNAP

He is a hybrid blaze born

BBH found Sap in the middle of the Nether playing with a few baby piglins

He met Quacky before Karl but Karl is the reason the three got together

TECHNOBLADE

Dispite how loud the voices can be sometimes l they can be rather peaceful. They really only get violent during fights

(Based off my techno design) the skull techno uses as a mask is a hoglin skull

Personally I dont think Philza adopted Techno as a son but Techno kinda became friends with Philza when he was just a kid

Techno was a very small child: especially in comparison to the village he came from in the Nether

Piglin hybrid piglin hybrid

Does not know who his parents are all he knows is that his glasses are from his mother

He has a baby sister(the two are half siblings; they have the same dad)

He literally doesnt need the glasses he just keeps them for the aesthetic and because its the only thing he has from his mom

He has a soft spot for Michael and Michelle since all three of them are forms of piglins

FUNDY

He has very vague memories of his mother

Looks stupidly similar to is grandmother; momza

He has a picture of Philza and Momza on their wedding day

One day when he was just a kid,like 14ish, he found an old sword that used to be Philzas and just never told Phil that he took it

KARL JACOBS

He's time traveled less after getting engaged to Quackity and Sapnap

Most of the books he writes never see the light of day again

Some of his books were actually found by one of Ranboo's descendants(not Ranbob)

One of his more scary experiences is when he accidentally met Dream when he was little. Momma Dream almost killed Karl

He's slightly immune to the effects of dreamon possession

He once found an old music box within the inbetween and he hasnt found a name for the song on the music box

PHILZA

He's known as the Angel of Death, or Deaths Angel for a reason(go look at @resonating-kitty s headcanon post about this. Ngl I love it and think it needs more attention)

After the 'death' of Momza, Philza swore to never love till he met Death once more

He remembers a time where hybrids used to be a lot more common: humans will fuck anything remotely humanoid

He doesnt remember if he has parents. By the time Wilbur was old enough to ask about them Philza made up the story that his parents went on to greet death when Wilbur was a baby

He's the reason for Momza's 'death'

SCHLATT

I really like the idea of Schlatt being Tubbo's dad even though it probably wont be canon

When Schlatt was little he watched his father but heads with other ram/sheep hybrids(he found it very funny)

He has a horrid tendency to headbutt people he has strong emotions towards

How hard he headbutts you really depends on what emotions he feels in that moment. The more loving/kind the emotion is the softer he'll be

When in a good mood Schlatt would let Quackity touch his horns

Glatt is a dick head and he knows this. He plays it up to piss people off even more

He comes from a rather large community of ram/sheep hybrids though his family in particular was a little violent

Schlatts first name is Jamison

He has a small ram plush from when he was little: his mother gave it to him before she died

His mother was an alcoholic before him though she was a very sad drunk

THE ERET

Herobrine is their cousin

He is very willing to do next to anything to succeed at something

He doesnt remember his family name

As a kid Eret's mother used to tell them stories of kings and queens. She told them that they could be a ruler one day if they worked hard enough

Their mums name was Elenora

GEORGENOTFOUND

(Based off of @/sctbrr on Twitter. I adore the au they made off this) George is a reincarnation of DreamXD's past lover.

Heterochromia heterochromia

His eyes are brown(left) and blue(right)

His clout glasses allow him to see color

RANBOO

Because he can’t remember his other half he doesn’t know what all he can/can’t do

Though one thing he’s noticed is that he can see much better in the dark than actual people; doesn’t know if he’s half enderman or his other half

As a kid he would pretend to be a dragon with someone. He has a feeling that the person was his father

He has two crowns. One from Techno and one from his mother; it’s one of the few things he genuinely remembers from when he was little

He sees a lot of Tubbo in Michael

Speaking of Michael, the lil one is only about three

TUBBO

He doesn’t know who his parents are and really only saw Philza as a father figure

He’s a ram hybrid like Schlatt

For the longest time he thought bees could understand him

[qiqi-media]

How I feel about Mal Bertha and her character PART 1

 This is not a Mal bertha Biography and it is biased in the sense that I don’t like her at all. Read with caution.

Descendants 2 was actually the first movie of the trilogy that I had watched. My little sister was watching it and I happened to be passing by and sat to watch it with her when it caught my eye. 2017 me had a completely different opinion of Mal bertha than today not because I was younger but simply because D3 hadn’t come out yet and I hadn’t watched the first movie or even knew there was books. I can’t stand Mal bertha, not even the D1 version of her and that’s the one even Mal antis love. I didn’t like her in the first movie but it was more of a “I wouldn’t be friends with her.” I didn’t think that she was unforgiveable and that it was impossible to give her a second chance. She made her own bad choices but she expressed genuine regret for them and was only 16. Despite me, loathing Mal’s existence I related to her in sense that it’s scary wanting to change but you don’t know whether or not your actions have caused too much damage. 

In D2 watching it as a stand alone I saw a girl wanting something other than the ‘happily ever after’ and deciding she would go for what would make her happy when she went back to isle. I was desperately hoping that after the ‘It’s going down’ scene that she would go back to the isle and not choose to stay somewhere she wanted to leave. But we know how that went and the ending left me bitter and sad not for her, but for Uma. She began to leave a bitter taste in my mouth when she broke up with Ben and came back and just expected him to get back together with her. I’m going to go around every version of her character.

PRE D1

She was a dick. That’s the simplest way I can put it. I don’t like even acknowledging pre d1 Mal because it leaves me with this very negative view of her character that I don’t think was necessary. I feel like this is a big fuck up, wanting to have Mal be her ‘evilest’ before coming to Auradon. I understand the reason why they wanted to show her growth and change throughout the series. But after looking at some real life scenarios with a similar Mal situation it made me look at it differently. Imagine this: someone who severely bullied you and harassed you and everyone around getting to go to a new place and get the best treatment there, then she’s congratulated with becoming queen of that land and not only that she then decides she’s going to be queen of the place she was bullying and harassing people at without ever properly apologizing. This happens in real life and these people get exposed which is why I don’t like it. It would be different if Mal actual grew throughout the series but it was real just her gaining more power and the scenery changing from Pre D1-D3. She also continued to make the same type of ‘mistakes’ with no actual direct consequences all she had to do was cry and they forgave her. She would be okay if it Descendants was a stand alone movie. But knowing the type of life she would get to live after all of this behavior puts me off from reading it. It would also be different if Mal lived a simple life in Auradon (Aka not trying to take control by dating the king and then stepping all over said king) She got more than what she deserved to have. In my opinion she did deserve the chance at all better life just like all the other kids who didn’t commit any crimes to be locked up. But in the eyes of people she victimized she wouldn’t deserve to be Queen become royalty, live in castles and get gifted with limos and bikes. 

D1

 D1 is the version of Mal everyone generally likes however, like I stated before I didn’t like her even then. At the start we see someone who is clearly trying to please her mother so if her mother wants bad behavior she gives her that. Throughout the main plot she did things of her own accord that she can’t use her mom as an excuse for. There’s a couple different things but a lot of them had to do with Ben and I’m making a whole post on how Ben was treated like shit throughout the franchise so that will be addressed then and not in this post. However for a reference she drugged him with a spelled cookie into falling in love with her for the wand. He wasn’t even willing to eat the cookie at first but she guilt tripped him into eating it. We could brush this off as her doing whatever she needed to do to get to the crown but to me she took advantage of the situation by actually going on dates with him. He was already spelled and willing to listen to whatever she wanted so besides for her own personal interest why would she go on the dates? (Granted a 16 year old wanting to get cute and have a nice date with a nice boy is not a fault or wrong in any way the fault here is all of this was happening when Ben was not in his right state of mind until the spell washed off.) Her taking advantage of Jane’s insecurities was not cool either and I’m interested in what ways she would’ve tried to use Jane if it was easier to get to the wand through her. Since her main crime in my opinion was Ben and since he’ll have his own essay post I’ll focus on Audrey here.

Her disrespect to Audrey

It was unnecessary, she had no reason to have had Audrey’s name in her mouth as much as she did D1. It would make more sense for Mal to like Audrey’s sassy boldness to me not shit talk her every chance she got. At the start they had a small passive aggressive conversation that could’ve just been left at that because technically they burred the hatchet between the two families. It was a “hey I don’t fuck with you, you don’t fuck with me” type of a situation that could’ve grown civil. However, throughout the movie in comparison to Audrey who really just had a problem with Mal’s mother until she spelled ben then it became direct problems with each other. Mal was continuously talking shit about Audrey as if Audrey was the one who fucked with her family. This time her upbringing can be referenced, on the Isle she most likely was allowed to openly hate things and Audrey was most likely raised to at least pretend to be polite. But from the Audrey we’ve seen she clearly doesn’t care about holding her tongue she’s straightforward with how she feels and she didn’t have a problem with Mal she had a problem with her mother. The only time she talked about Mal directly was about the hair spells which she ended up being right about (Mal’s addictive reliance on magic in D2 and Jane at the end of D1).  After completely ignoring Audrey’s feelings and literally stole her boyfriend (not even on the the you can’t steal a loyal man type of shit she literally stole him he wasn’t even allowed to consent to it.) She later in Audrey’s Diary multiple times tries to reason this with she never meant to directly hurt Audrey and that she didn’t really want Ben she just wanted the wand etc etc. The evidence doesn’t back this up Mal, you’ve made your disdain for Audrey clear and talked shit about her to Evie right after you spelled Ben the did I mention bs claiming “Chad will see her horrible personally” as if you knew her personally and that Chad didn’t grow up with her. Mal can say she didn’t mean to hurt Audrey but she clearly didn’t mind that she did.

 I’m going to make a whole separate on Audrey and how I do think she gets a lot of slack because people can relate to her, but also how her treatment in comparison to Mal’s is unfair. 

 I did think she deserved a chance to show remorse for her behavior (spoiler: she didnt) Again, I like to look at things from the pov of other characters for things like this. If I was an Auradon kid who was friends with Mal and ended up finding out she was using me and plotting to take over and destroy the place I lived with/for her mother but changed her mind last minute. I would see her as forgivable I just wouldn’t want her around me. In other words I would expect her to start her own new life, not continue trying to live the one where she was plotting without even actually apologizing to people. AU: After descendants instead of continuing to date Ben she breaks it off and goes to an Art school frequently coming back to visit Auradon and after high school she goes on a quest (with the C4 of course) exploring all kinds of different kingdoms and countries because she was locked up on the isle her whole life. In the future she possibly returns to Auardon and even could get back together with Ben with a proper start.

D2

The first Descendants Movie I ever saw so it holds a special place with me and I actually rooted for Mal the first time I watched it. I sat in to watch at the argument scene and knowing all of the plots now and after rewatching  it my opinion has change greatly. We see a blonde and very stressed Mal who’s dealing with the pressures of becoming a royal in order to secure her place with Ben. I do feel bad for Mal when she was talking to Evie, she was trying to reach out to her friend about her situation and was basically told to stop talking about it. I understand Evie’s feelings of wanting to leave the past behind but I can also understand Mal feeling like she’s cornered and can’t even talk to her best friend. I can also understand her feelings of ending up overwhelmed with her decisions from going to somebody who did whatever whenever to becoming a royal with duties I get the pressure. If Mal decided that wasn’t the life she wanted to live and went back to the isle where she felt more comfortable I don’t see anything wrong with that. She wasn’t required to stay in Auradon if she felt like she was unhappy there. That says a little something about Auradon to me if somebody would rather live where they ate rotten food than live there.  My sympathy for Mal stops there because everything else was a result of her own actions and things she brought onto herself.

1. The royal situation

Let’s get one thing clear nobody was forcing Mal to hand sign up for the prime and proper royal life. She did that herself.

Nobody told her that she had to dye her hair blonde and have a complete wardrobe change, she did.

Nobody said she even had to continue the terrible relationship she had with Ben and go straight into being a royal in order to basically become Ben’s wifey, she did.

She’s saying all of these people are expecting things of her when 6 months ago she was stealing candy from babies when she was the one who let people have these expectations. She decided to take up the role herself because that was what she wanted. Let’s be honest with how it happened Mal would not live in Auradon if she had to be a regular citizen she wanted to be in control of everybody and to have power because that how she always lived. However once she realized that nobody was just about to hand her this power just for being with Ben unlike with her Mom  (getting to rule the isle just because she was her daughter and not because she actually worked her way up there) and that she actually had duties and work to fulfill if she wanted to be the boss. She let her pride get in the way by feeling she had to prove she could last with Ben and become an Auradon girl and ended up miserable and blaming Ben for  something she decided to do herself.

She then had the responsibility to fulfill all of those duties and she was struggling unlike anybody else who would’ve had to abide by the “don’t use magic” quote on quote rule she decided to use Magic after claiming she’d give it up and was still a hot ass mess. She can’t even use the excuse that was to help her with her lady in training because she was using it to not be late to class and later to try and manipulate Ben.  @ishiphumasohard made a good response on why it was unfair for Mal to use magic as her ‘right’ because at what point would it be unfair to other kids? While all the other kids have to show up on time to school Mal gets to use magic to turn back time instead of just being on time. If other kids studied all night for a test Mal can use a speed reading spell. If there was a cooking contest Mal can spell her way into a feast while the others would have to the actual labor. You get the point, because magic is not universally used by everyone in Auradon and it’s an unspoken rule that it’s not to be used then she should have followed this rule.

I will say the girl was stressed and was feeling alone, I already gave my sympathies for that.

The magic situation really hit the fan when she felt comfortable enough to spell the boyfriend who had already put enough trust in her to continue their relationship that started with her drugging him for her own benefit. Compared to her Ben did seem to be taking it easy but maybe like her, he didn’t want to show it. It seems Ben and Mal had a sort of pack to work hard together to become ‘the king and queen’ of Auradon they were supposed to be in it together. In my opinion it would make more sense for Ben to be hiding things from Mal than the other way around due to the nature of their shitty relationship. But that’s just not how it went down and after Mal tries to spell Ben into not finding her spellbook he gets RIGHTFULLY ANGRY. That entire scene was her fault, she could’ve explained herself and why she was using magic and that she was having a hard time but she once again decides to take advantage of Ben’s trust. Then proceeds to make sure she ends the  fight with her being the victim. So much so that the entire fact that she spelled Ben was never brought up again.

Going back to the isle 

She then decides to go back to the isle, if this was really her decision I wouldn’t mind it. There’s nothing wrong with her liking the isle better than Auradon if that’s where she felt at home. The problem was she was clearly emotional and let’s be honest, if she had called all of her friends together and actually broke up with Ben and told them this was her decision to go back to the isle before leaving they MIGHT (hard might) not have ran after her like they did. Not only that the duties that we were speaking of earlier, she didn’t formally pull out of anything which is why it irked me when she was so irritated that they came back for her.

Some people actually didn’t like her attitude as soon as she got back on the isle because she expected to run it. That wasn’t surprising to me honestly, because for her whole life that’s how it was, only person she was scared of was her mother. She quickly realized however now that her mom isn’t around and in lizard form nobody was scared of her. Most unrealistic part of D2 was how Mal didn’t get jumped as soon as people realized she got back. Like I said Isle Mal was a straight dickhead and had too many enemies to be walking around like she was. 

Another point was when she got her hair dyed by dizzy, the shop wasn’t open, she saw this, ignored it and went in anyway. Not even because her and Dizzy were tight like that she just expected her to do what she wanted (get the pattern with Mal here?)

 Skipping her scene with harry because it did nothing to the plot.

The rest of the C4 and Ben come to get Mal back as expected and she acts all surprised and angry. Ben apologizes to her and instead of apologizing for what she did and then explaining that she doesn’t want to go back to Auradon and be a lady of the court. She continues the narrative that Ben wanted her to change and that she’s not good for Auradon so she’s going to stay on the isle. What’s the difference between the two? The first one is her taking responsibility of her actions and deciding for herself that that’s not the life she wants. While the other is acknowledging none of the blame and deciding to run away not because that’s not what she really wants but because everyone will turn on her so she has to run first. It painted a narrative that nothing of this was her own doing while at the same time making it seem like she is doing the right thing by backing away which in hindsight probably was the better decision. Mal’s feelings weren’t the problem I understand them, she thinks she won’t be accepted as herself so she wants to leave before they can kick her out but that’s not what caused her to leave and she knows it. You got caught doing something shitty and instead of apologizing you ran away.

After Ben gets kidnapped she lectures the C4, again she does have some blame in this. With the way the fight ended it made it look like Ben was in the wrong so he was going to try and apologize regardless if they brought him or not. The rest of them came to keep him safe and as her gang members come back for her. Was this not something she considered after she calmed herself down? Ben honestly had no reason to be directly on the isle unprotected besides to sneak and apologize to you so are you really going to just blame the C4 for bringing him there and getting him captured?

Then when Uma, who has him captured plans a meeting she antagonizes her like that’s what is best for Ben at the time. Even in the mist of Ben being in danger she thought it was a good idea to try and piss off the person holding him captive. If you don’t remember what she did she called her shrimpy, insulted the smell of the restaurant and said she never thought of Uma while implying that Uma always had her on her mind for no reason. None of that was necessary to ask what Uma’s conditions were to give Ben back she just couldn’t help herself. 

She didn’t care about Dizzy

Who had just performed a task for her and right after she paid her got robbed and had the place trashed just for Mal to say she’ll be alright. This should’ve been foreshadowing at the very least that she wasn’t ready to be making decisions for other people’s lives because besides her own and her friends she didn’t care for many especially those on the isle.

It’s going down

Even though it was in the song and not directly her words again antagonizing the person who has Ben held captive and threatening his life, insulting them is stupid. This entire scene is messy and they shouldn’t even had been able to win a fight against pirates outnumbered. When has Mal ever picked up a sword???

Car ride Back

She gets mad when Ben has sympathy/ shows understanding for Uma. She somehow realizes that it’s wrong Uma kidnapped him but was comfortable spelling him without a second thought. In my opinion she thought she had some type of ownership over Ben she could do what she wanted to him and if somebody else did it was wrong. (Even though this can be applied to what she did in D1, I’m only talking about D2 because most people agree she showed regret for her actions in D1) When he calls her out on her hypocrisy she goes mute and does that thing, of letting her mouth hang opened whenever she gets called out on her shit.

END OF PART 1

I was going to make this one long post but I’ve been putting this off long enough so here is part 1, no idea when part 2 will be up. I do hope to have the Ben posts up before that.

[my-own-oracle]

Could I get a fluffy Drift romantic Valentine thingy?

Of course! Every bot deserves some love. You didn't specify any specific version of Drift, so I'm going with the MTMTE version. If you wanted RID15 or something else, just let me know. Sorry, this kinda got long; I've been without power for the majority of 3 days, this was one of the few things I could to do.

You still kept track of the days that passed on Earth. At first, it was for your own amusement. Wanting to keep track of the time on Earth, but as some holidays came and went, you kept track to keep the connection to your home alive. You kept track of the calendar changes, making a special note when you entered the month of February

You planned, quietly and carefully, gathering spare datapads and using your little stash of credits to purchase a small gift for a particular bot. It was hard keeping the whole thing a secret, considering most of the things you had to hide away were significantly larger than you, but by the power of pure determination, you managed. 

You spent hours locked away in your hab-unit, carefully typing out cheesy Valentine's poems for your friends. Most following the 'roses are red, and violets are blue' format. And when they were done, you beamed. 

You spent the day dragging different data pads around to other bots. Tailgate had even decided to help you for a while, flying you around on his hoverboard, laughing and talking with you as you made your way through the large ship. Even with his help, the event took up most of the day. Slowly everything was handed out. All but one Valentine remained. 

You bid a farewell to Tailgate as he dropped you off at your hab-unit. You had to do this delivery alone. 

This was the Valentine that mattered the most.

**** Drift had spent most of the day with Rodimus, talking about everything from different tactical plans to the many ways the Co-captain could encourage and rally his mechs with a more powerful aura. Or at least Rodimus pretended to listen to that last part. Either way, Drift had spent several hours with his friend. During that time, the spectralist had spied an unusual sight, a datapad in Rodimus' personal quarters. "Did someone slip that in here when you weren't looking?" Rodimus laughed good-naturedly before shaking his helm.

"No, the Space Cadet dropped it off. She's celebrating an earth holiday today and is passing out some gifts to bots she thinks will appreciate them. Rodimus passed the datapad over to Drift, letting him read the short poem written on it.

"Roses are red, And you are too. I am so thankful, To be friends with you." 

Drift found himself smiling as he reads the blurb of text below it, where you explained Valentine's day and its significance to humans in your own culture. 

"So this day is used to express love and gratitude to those around you?" Drift clarified, smiling a little wider as Rodimus nodded.

"She told me humans also use this day as an excuse to express more romantic kinds of love too."

A feeling of jealousy settled in his tanks. 

"(Y/N)- she is truly a wonderful person. Did she pass out many of these?" 

"She had a large stack. You'll probably have one waiting for you in your room," A servo pushed into drifts shoulder plating.

"I doubt that we-" he calms his spark before speaking again. "We may be friends, but we hardly spend time alone together. I think she's frightened of me."

"Uhhh I-"

"She must have learned about some of the things in my past. She can hardly look at me in the optics when we're together, and if we are alone, she can't speak. I fear that I may be terrifying to be around.."

"Okay…. Have you ever thought that maybe your being," Rodumis rolled his optics, "I don't know, a little overdramatic?" 

Drift pondered the thought. But no matter how he looked at it, the hesitant gaze, the fidgeting when together, the quietness she only had around him, all signs pointed to her fearing him.

"Drift, please, don't make me be the responsible one. It goes against my entire being." 

Silence lapsed again.

"I am not spelling this out for you," Rodimus stood, pulling Drift to his peds and shoving him out the door. "Come back when you're done being a sparkling. Go talk to her," the door shut, leaving Drift to walk back to his hab-unit.

****

You could feel your heart racing under your ribs. Thundering with each step you took, leading you to pause every few meters. 'This is so stupid. I can't do this.' you told yourself for the hundredth time. 

"You alright there, Space Cadet?" you snapped your head behind you, spying Rodimus standing maybe a few feet away. When had he snuck up on you?

"I'm fine, just lost in my head." you face back towards Drifts unit, your confidence waning with each passing second.

"Is that another one of those valentines?" Rodimus squatted down to you your level, a servo reaching out to the special datapad you had placed on the hall floor. 

"No," you dashed in front of his hand. "Nothing of interest, really. It's just like the one I gave to you and everybody else."

"And I suppose the box next to it is nothing too," you took a large step to the right, standing between the white and red wrapped box you had next to the Data-pad, before sharing a small, shy smile with the co-captain.

"It's- it's nothing." your voice was softer than you wanted it to be. The smug look on Rodimus' face told you he didn't buy it. "I wanted to give a gift to someone, and if I was on Earth, I would give a special someone candy. I found out Cybertronians can eat energon candies, and I bought a crystal of it as a gift. But it's stupid. He probably won't like it anyways." 

You sunk your head closer to your shoulders. "Just giving him a poem and a piece of candy isn't going to make someone like him notice me." Your fingers worked at the hem of your shirt, rolling the worn material as a means to work out the lump you felt forming in your throat.

Rodimus held his servo out to you, a silent invitation to 'climb up' as he so often said. You took it, settling down into his palm. You watched as he carefully gathered your measly gift into his other servo and began walking in the direction you needed to go.

"So, you like this mech, and you're worried he doesn't like you." You nod. "Who is it?"

"I'd rather not say."

"It's not Ultra Magnus, is it?" You snap a playful glare at your friend. "I just needed to know, I'd still support you, but I won't be thrilled."

"No, it's not Magnus." you heard his vent of relief. Thundering footsteps filled the hall as Rodimus carried you farther a small way.

"so…"

"It- I, Drift," you whispered. "It's for Drift." You were thankful Rodimus didn't outright laugh. He did his best to stay composed. You could feel it in the way his digits curled for a moment, him gasping for air as he tried to talk.

"You think, he- you dont realize-" giggles filled the space between each attempted sentence.

"Yes, I like Drift. Go on, get it out. The little silly human is in love with a bot who probably couldn't care less, who's so far out of her league it's embarrassing." The lump in your throat returned, this time accompanied by a burning feeling behind your eyes. You took a few calming breaths, refusing to cry in such a frustrating situation.

"Oh stars, you're hopeless." Rodimus was smiling, oblivious to your emotional turmoil or not caring about it. "Trust me," he lifted you level with his politics, "He'll be thrilled."

***** Drift sat in his hab-unit, wondering how he could use this Valentine's day thing to his advantage. Find a way to earn some positive affection, and talk to you.

He was coming up blank; you were beloved. There was no way you would give up your time to talk to a bot who terrified you. If only he knew a way to quell your fear and maybe show that he wasn't such a bad bot. Drift heard his door open but didn't turn from his desk. His EM field told him it was Rodimus. 

"Yo." Rodimus walks over to Drift, and before he can turn, his friend grips the closest servo to him. Drift feels you more than sees you, as you're practically tossed into his servo. His optics widen monetarily, and he throws his other servo around you, desperately trying to keep you from falling.

You have his full attention, so much so that the sound of Rodimus putting your gift down on Drift's desk before walking out hardly registers in his audials. Rodimus' smug "You'll thank me later" rings aloud and as the door slides shut behind him.

Drift cautiously checks you over for injuries.  Slowly you roll over, sitting up and trying to look up into Drift's optics. 

Your eyes can barely go past his chassis.

"Are you alright?" Drift questions. His optics take over you again, first your body, then your aura.  

"Hi Drift, I'm alright" you raise your hand in a little wave,  you sound a little frightened, and he watches as your body tenses. "I'm sorry for-uh- barging in like this. But I wanted to bring you a valentines gift." you waved your hand to the small offering on the desk beside him. "It's been delivered, so I'll stop bothering you now, I'm so sorry to have-"

"You are not bothering me," he smiles down at you. You're nervous; that much is plain to see.  He turns his attention to your gift. While the box interests him, he takes the datapad first. 

"Roses are red, And you are kind. I hold you in my heart, always on my mind."

He watches from the corner of his optics as you become red, the color complimenting the flustered pink in your aura. 

"The poem is beautiful," he smiles, but you don't look at him in the optic. He puts down the pad and reaches for the box. The lid removes easily, and he is touched by the piece of energon candy you had inside. 

"Thank you for my gifts, though I will say I'm surprised you gave me one," your eyes snapped to his optics wide and hurt.

"Why, you're my friend." Your question was soft, so quiet should he had been organic, he wouldn't have heard it. 

"You're frightened of me, so I didnt think you would take the time to make me a gift."

"I'm not frightened of you," your hand reached our reassuringly to one of the digits around you, "What gave you that impression?"

Drift listed the clues he had gathered over the few months you'd been aboard, noting that with each one, a look of guilt took form over your face.

"Drift- I-I am not afraid of you," you stood abruptly, hopping from his hand to his desk "do you know what valentine's day is all about on earth?" 

"It's about showing your affection to those in your life," your smile made his spark hum. It was soft, there was fear, but he focused in closer and saw in your aura; it wasn't a fear of him.

"Correct, but only half correct. It's also about telling people who don't know you lo-" you took a breath. "Some humans use this day to confess their love for another person." He could see the struggle you had to keep your eyes at his optics. "Those things I did, the ones that made you think I was scared of you, I did them because I was nervous. I really like you Drift, I would go as far as to say love, but I'm frightened at what you'll do, what you'll think." 

He brought his servo to you again, two digits brushing your cheek and your hair. "If I were human, and it was Valentine's day, what should I do to quell your fears? How am I supposed to respond if I feel the same way about you?" 

You leaned into his digits, your body relaxing from a tension he hadn't realized you had been holding in.

"You just did."

[lovetenya]

𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬: 𝐲𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰

pairing: tenya iida x gn! reader

warnings: angst. anxiety. paranoia. self doubt. unkind words. non-explicit mentions of physical pain & scarring. implied death, but i don’t elaborate. lying. worrying.

word count: about 1.8k

author’s note: nobody writes any iida angst, (barely anyone writes for him at all) and as a vehement lover of angst, i thought i’d fill that gap. i love tenya, i really do, but i love to think about him in this way just as much as i love to believe he’d be the perfect other half. nobody is perfect, not even ingenium.

loving tenya iida is yellow.

it’s the color of the petals on the soft yellow daisy bouquet that he surprised you with on the night of your first anniversary. although it wasn’t a last minute purchase (how could he forget the best day of his life?), he still wasn’t exactly sure what to get. 

what kind of object can symbolize a love so encapsulating?, he thought. there is no tangible item that could possibly show how i feel.

he picked up the familiar flowers from a shop on the corner that the two of you had walked past before on a date. it was one of the first ones, and you pressed your face against the glass to get a better look at the delicate flowers inside.

he caught himself in his romantics when he thought that none of them were prettier than you. nothing was or ever would be better than this moment, where you were on your tip toes in an attempt to see more flowers. that day, he insisted on buying you a small bouquet of yellow daisies, and thought it would be sweet to indulge and revisit the memory.

the week before your anniversary, he made you promise not to execute any elaborate celebratory plans.

“honey, you know that I’d rather do nothing with you than anything with anyone else,” he said. and he was serious. he would rather sit together on the couch half-listening to a documentary (because you can’t keep your eyes off each other) than go out to dinner, where he couldn’t let down his guard. 

although he liked to think that his work made the world a safer place, he couldn’t help but feel paranoid whenever you were out in public. how could he be sure that someone in the restaurant didn’t want him dead? how could he be sure that they wouldn’t kidnap and kill you just to make him suffer? if he couldn’t be sure, was it worth the risk?

he’s an iida, after all. with their striking looks and long hero legacy, it’s not exactly easy to blend in in a world whose wellbeing depends on your greatness and ability. there’s a great sense of pride in coming from a long lines of heroes, and his parents were much less than thrilled to receive the phone call that tenya was in the hospital following the incident that rendered his arm “useless”. they weren’t happy to see that he chose to leave his arm that way as a reminder of his dedication. 

when they figured he was out of earshot, they asked questions.

did the doctors check for any mental ailments?

will he ever be able to use his arm again?

why didn’t they amputate? 

what kind of hero accepts a physical wound and doesn’t try to heal?

what kind of hero goes after a villain on their own?

are you sure he’s cut out to be a hero? 

tenya isn’t proud of the publicity his family got following the incident including a certain self-proclaimed hero killer. he isn’t proud of the wary stares he gets from his classmates. he isn’t proud of the violence he’s been forced to commit. he isn’t proud of any of it, really, but he doesn’t regret his actions; not for a second, not even when he’s painstakingly rubbing scar balm into his shoulder, hoping that at least the scars would fade.

the pain, which seeped deep into his muscles and pricked at his bones, was more than just a cosmetic concern. he couldn’t care less about a scar, but with his limited movement capabilities, he knew he’d never be able to teach his sons to throw. the doctors didn’t have to tell him that. but, of course, they did. he knew what it all meant. he saw through their sugarcoating and attempts at softening the blow. they should’ve known better.

although he’s now your tenya, he was a hero first. 

before there was you, there was responsibility. before there was love and devotion, there were hero duties and combat instincts. they’re ingrained into his mind, refusing to be ignored. even when things seem fine, he can’t help but make sure. he couldn’t live with himself if his laziness were to cause someone else’s pain. that isn’t what heroes do. when you’re in public, he’s constantly scanning the room and won’t sit with his back to a door or window, because he needs to be able to see who’s coming and going. he has to make sure that everything is fine. he has to make sure everyone is safe, and everything is put-together. 

he has to be strong, because there are thousands of people counting on him. he has to be strong, because evil doesn’t rest. he has to be strong, because... if not him, then who?

--

the day of your anniversary, you texted tenya while he was at work.

you: i hope you have a great day, my love! i can’t wait until you get home so we can celebrate! <3!!

tenya: I can’t wait either! I love you very much, sweetheart. See you later.

--

he came home with his arms full of the bouquet of flowers, and almost teared up at the sight of the dinner you had set up for the two of you. you always considered every worry, every caution, every gut feeling of his, and he appreciated that more than he’d ever be able to express. no words did it justice. 

you’re more than his other half, you’re his everything. you’re everything he needs, everything he can’t be, and more.

you surprised him with an at-home dinner date, where it was perfectly safe and calm, and there were no people hiding in the shadows. music softly played in the background, and the daisies looked perfect on the table.

it’s okay, tenya, you reminded him. you’re home now. 

--

yellow is tenya’s birthday present, or the envelope holding it at least. 

there are only so many thoughtful gifts you can give before the inspiration simply runs out, and you have to go bigger. you have to look forward, and think of what will really leave a mark on someone’s life. you only have so many chances to get it right. 

one year, for his birthday, you got him the deed to a recently-discovered star and named it after him. a star for your star. your guide in the dark. your light in unimaginable darkness. your ever-present warmth.

--

many years later, when tenya is long gone, his star sparkles a little brighter.

through the telescope, he seems to be waving hello.

--

golden yellow is the promise ring that you have no idea how tenya afforded.

you insist he take it back and that neither of you are ready for the commitment, but he refuses, of course.he’s never been more ready for something in his life. he tells you,

“i got it for you because you’re worth it.

every day with you is worth it.

i never want to spent another day of my life without promising to love you every second of every day.

every time you wear this ring, you’ll be reminded of how much i love you.

i saved for months, anticipating this very moment when i’d get to promise myself to you forever. 

i promise, you deserve it.

you deserve everything, and i can’t wait to give it to you.” 

and you did deserve it. and you deserve him, in all of his glory. forever.

--

the harsh bruises littering his chiseled body are yellow at first. they turn purple, eventually, before they fade away completely. their sting, however, is more than just the pain of broken blood vessels. they’re a concrete reminder that tenya isn’t untouchable. he isn’t invincible. he’s human, and he bleeds red.

the bruises come when his instincts send him in the wrong direction, when he dodged too late, or when he couldn’t seem to land a kick. he tells you that they’re from when he “tripped going down the stairs” or when izuku “accidentally punched him too hard during a training session.” (lies.)

yellow is the embarrassment you feel when you confront izuku, pleading with him to be more careful with tenya, and he tells you that he couldn’t have possibly caused those bruises, because hasn’t seen iida outside of class in weeks. nobody has. he’s been training more than usual, and hasn’t been at group dinners.

yellow is the sickness and guilt you feel at the realization, because you recently teased iida for not getting his homework done. he smiled weakly, pretending like it was just a foolish slip-up. it was so unlike him, you couldn’t help but poke a little fun.

“ooooh!!! class representative iida tenya, professional stick in the mud, didnt complete his populations analysis essay on time??? somebody call the news outlets!!! or an ambulance, because i think i might die from shock!!!”

he couldn’t blame you for your ignorance, because he liked that you didn’t know. you didn’t know how tired he was. you didn’t know how hard he was pushing himself. you didn’t know how hard he was working. you didn’t know how close he was to breaking. nobody did, and he liked it that way. nobody wants to see their leader falter, or hesitate, or fail, so he didn’t let them.

while he didn’t like to make you wait, he especially didn’t like to make you worry, and he figured the best way to do that was to keep it all in. he was supposed to be an upstanding hero, worthy of admiration and inspiring greatness in all, but at the end of the day, your opinion of him mattered the most.

in his mind, he was supposed to be your hero. and he tried, with every fiber of his being, to be your everything.

he was supposed to keep you safe, not keep you up at night, wondering if this morning was the last time you’d get to kiss him goodbye. he’s supposed to come home to you, and he promised, even though he couldn’t be sure, that he would. he didn’t want to lie about that.

his lies are yellow. they’re made with hope of protecting you, with keeping you safe from the evil swirling through the world. 

what you don’t know can’t hurt you, right?

...right? 

they’re made with intentions filled with sunshine and his golden gaze when you’re supposed to be studying, but the temptation is too strong. 

his intentions are filled with the colored pencils scattered on the floor of his dorm room from when you sketched each other for the first time. 

they’re filled with honey coated love, first sweet and satisfying, but eventually leaving you with a sore throat. they leave you feeling his love, but also his lies. 

and through it all, you still love him, maybe even to a fault.

even when he’s yellow.

[neverdoingmuch]

hello! I just wanted to ask, which do you think in the mdzs novel has the most questionable morality? like they have done more bad things but they still had kindness in them somehow (?)

oh!! this is a hard one for me anon! i’m always bad at ranking characters but i’ll do my best!  i’m not sure if you were hoping for like a quick answer or a long one but i’m gonna go with a long one bc that’s always fun and i’ll do a tldr if you don’t want to read through all that? yeah that seems like it’ll work because holy shit i didnt mean for it to get so long (and kind of away from the point of your ask too so sorry about that!)

okay! So, the three main contenders for morally dubious characters are, as far as I’ve seen, Xue Yang, Jin Guangyao, and Wei Wuxian. Not a big surprise, I’m sure. While they’re the more obvious options, they do have a lot of parallels and exhibit a lot of the themes and ideas that MXTX was getting at. I mean, I love looking at Jin Guangyao and Wei Wuxian as foils, and even other combinations of the three, so my answer will probably be heavy on the comparisons. I do think it’s worth touching on Jiang Cheng as well though. Also, I’ll try to stay as unbiased as I can because there’s a few characters on this list that I just don’t like … like at all.

Jiang Cheng tends to get brushed over a lot when it comes to some of the horrible things he’s done. From promising to protect Wei Wuxian from dogs only to immediately use them as a threat whenever he wants to to leading a siege on a group of people he knows are completely innocent of any crimes to torturing and killing people for thirteen years, he’s definitely not a good person. His concerns lie first and foremost with himself and his. That doesn’t seem like a horrible thing at first – he should owe his loyalty to himself, his family, and his sect – but it does mean that when the Xuanwu’s cave situation happened, his response was to get mad that Wei Wuxian helped Jin Zixuan and Lan Wangji. (And that’s why Jiang Fengmian got mad at him!). Later on, when pressure comes from the sects regarding Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng chooses not to stand with him, which, while understandable, isn’t exactly a kind move to someone who called Jiang Cheng his family and was trying to repay the debt the two of them owed Wen Qing. There’s no denying that he does care about Wei Wuxian, but when forced to make hard choices, he picks what’s easiest for himself. In general, I’d say that his sense of morality is selfish and somewhat flighty, but not necessarily questionable, so I’ll move on!

For the usual suspects, I’ll start with Xue Yang because I’m just going to immediately eliminate him from the running. I’ve seen people interpret his character sympathetically or try to justify some of his actions or the way he turned out, but I honestly just can’t. While you could feel sympathetic towards him because of his childhood, we have Wei Wuxian as a direct contrast to Xue Yang, as well as, to a certain degree, Jin Guangyao. Both Xue Yang and Wei Wuxian were street kids who had a horrible time in their youth, but Wei Wuxian was able to leave that behind him. That’s a lot easier to do when you’ve been adopted into a major sect and afforded comforts above your station (and also have terrible coping mechanisms), but even Jin Guangyao’s revenge isn’t quite as wide-spread and malicious. I know it may seem a bit obvious, anon, but some people really do try and treat Xue Yang like he’s morally dubious which confuses me a lot because how?? Even if we do say that he has suitable cause, one of the messages of the novel is that your past experiences don’t justify your future actions, so even within the context of the novel – a novel which is concerned with highlighting the grey areas of morality – Xue Yang isn’t afforded any sympathy. So, there’s really no way to construe him in a positive light. His only moments of kindness come with his time spent in Yi City with Xiao Xingchen, where Xue Yang doesn’t change much – he may have cared for Xiao Xingchen, but Xue Yang still tortured him as he did so. I never quite read that arc as Xue Yang learning to care or being allowed to be kind again so I’d just say that he lacks both morals and kindness. On that basis we can boot him from this competition. 

Jin Guangyao may have been one of the antagonists of the novel, but he wasn't a completely bad person or like The Worst. His main crimes involved getting revenge for slights against him or his mother – being from Nie Mingjue, Jin Guangshan, or any number of other cultivators. I think that, to an extent, his actions are justifiable. While you can contrast this to the way Wei Wuxian gets called a servant's son, they do differ in the fact that Wei Wuxian is afforded a higher level of protection due to him being favoured by Jiang Fengmian. Additionally, when Wei Wuxian does have his birth used against him, he's usually the person who acted out first anyway. Jin Guangyao was insulted for doing little more than exist and was never the person to act out first, yet still faced a near constant onslaught of insults. I'm not saying his actions were justified by any means, but the reasoning behind his actions is sound. The one thing I will note is that he doesn't let go of his grudges – even when everything is all done and dusted and he has everything that he could possibly want from life, he still holds onto that hatred. I remember seeing a post where someone mentioned that characters who were able to move on and change for the better were able to get their happy ending in MDZS, which isn't relevant here but definitely applies to Jin Guangyao when thinking about why he got the ending he did. I don't agree with the degree to which he enacted his revenge against certain characters and I loathe the whole Qin Su situation. I don't care how much he cries about it, he could've at least told her, but I mainly just pretend that part didn't exist. So, he has suitable cause for at least some of his actions, and his other victims can just be classified as necessary collateral rather than being intentional innocent targets, if that makes sense, but he's definitely vindictive and spiteful.

On the other hand, he did a lot of good, too. He's a side character for the most part so Jin Guangyao didn't get the most screen-time, but we do hear of some of the good things he's done. The main example would probably be the watchtowers. One of the interesting things about Jin Guangyao and Wei Wuxian is that while both of them are capable of kindness, the breadth and scope of Jin Guangyao's is much broader – the watchtowers are an idea that not only showcase how Jin Guangyao's upbringing allows him to see flaws in the cultivation world that the other privileged cultivators can't, but also show how he does care about the people. I've seen a few people try and play it as a spying technique but I don’t really believe that in the slightest. I mean, the point of the towers is to cover the areas where the sects aren't, so I have no idea what Jin Guangyao's people would even be spying on. Anyway, setting up those watchtowers really didn't benefit him any specific way – unless you consider him endearing himself to Lan Xichen and garnering a good reputation with the common folk something that outweighs the absolute nightmare it would have been to make the sects participate in the project to begin with. In a more specific case, Jin Ling's dog was given to him by Jin Guangyao. It's interesting that, despite Jin Ling spending the novel being trailed by Jiang Cheng, the gift that he obviously cares for deeply is from Jin Guangyao. In the Guanyin Temple scene I definitely got the sense that Jin Ling had loved and trusted Jin Guangyao before the truth came out so I'm firmly convinced that he would've been a wonderful and conscientious uncle to him and just generally good to the people who worked for him and/or the commoners.

Okay, now Wei Wuxian!! As far as I've seen, people are relatively good at staying true to his questionable sense of morality. Like with Jin Guangyao, we know that he can be vindictive and pretty excessive when it comes to getting his revenge, but I'm not going to deny that I was definitely rooting for him when he went after Wen Chao and his little gang. The main issue with Wei Wuxian is probably the demonic cultivation – the stigma against it tends to get reduced to it being bad for the user and their temperament etc. etc., but there's more to it than that. I'm no expert on Daoism by any means, but from my understanding desecration of corpses and disturbing the dead is a significant cultural taboo. This isn't just Wei Wuxian doing something no one else can do (though it certainly is true), it's also him doing something no one else should do. I've seen the massacre at Nightless City being added as another tally to his list of crimes, but I honestly think that that isn’t a crime worth adding – he needed to defend himself so he did, simple as that. 

As I mentioned above, Wei Wuxian's kindness is a bit more specific – where Jin Guangyao cares for the people, Wei Wuxian cares for individuals. We see his kindness more clearly, be it because he's the main character or be it because actions are clearer and stronger when it's for a single person or a small group. It's a bit easier, in my opinion, to care about people when you don't have to live with them and face them every day, but Wei Wuxian does. Even though Wei Wuxian led a lot more comfortable life than Jin Guangyao, we never really see Jin Guangyao get his hands dirty in the same way Wei Wuxian does. When a sacrifice needs to be made, Wei Wuxian’s the one who makes it. He doesn't relegate, he does it himself. We know that he would do absolutely anything for those he cares about and that's why he's able to commit a lot of the atrocities he does.

When it comes to deciding between Jin Guangyao and Wei Wuxian for most questionable morality, I think we need to look at the reasons behind their actions. Wei Wuxian’s sense of morality is definitely nowhere near that of the Lans but he has always been driven by his sense of justice and his love for those around him. In that sense, I've always read him as having a flexible sense of morality rather than a questionable one. I'm not sure how much of it ties in with his sense of duty, but it's definitely a lot. Wei Wuxian is, and always will, fill the role that is required of him – be it the childish and sweet younger brother, the talented but flippant older brother, the monster that wins the war, or the fierce protector that gives his all, Wei Wuxian will twist himself into whatever position he's needed in at that moment. Obviously, he went after Wen Chao for his own benefit, and the corrupting influence of the resentful energy does need to be factored into this, but at his core, Wei Wuxian will always value his duty (to his sect, family, friends, and innocents) and doing what is right over anything else. He may have stumbled along the way, but he did manage to form his own path to uphold all the values that he wanted to. Jin Guangyao, on the other hand, is similar to Jiang Cheng in how he's driven by his own motivations for betterment and revenge, albeit with more grace and intelligence. Jin Guangyao may masquerade as being motivated by any number of causes but he will never do anything at his own risk, and he will always be his top priority. So, while it's a close call between Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao, I'm going to have to go with Jin Guangyao on this one!

tldr; the fandom favourites for questionable morality are xy, jgy, and wwx so i mainly looked at them. I included jc as well but neither xy or jc demonstrate the dichotomy needed so they got eliminated from the running. Jgy and wwx both commit and are willing to commit horrible crimes as well as being capable of caring for others and being kind. but, where wwx is driven by his sense of justice and love for others, jgy is driven by his own motivations for betterment and revenge, making for a more questionable morality (as compared to wwx's more flexible morality).

[turnaboutyandere]

Ace attorney characters when you pack a bento box (boxed lunch) for them:

(In japan that's a indirect expression of love and in this case a confession)

Phoenix gets it right away. He smiles and blushes. And as he kisses y/n for the first time realizes he might not need to chase rivals away. Out of all of them hes probably the softest receiving a bento box. He jumps straight to calling you his girlfriend. Phoenix thinks about it all day and when he opens it come lunchtime and finds a little love note above his rice he tears up.

(Also if you make two, one for him and one for trucy he will melt)

Miles DOESNT get it right away. He doesnt understand why, when he has so much money, y/n would feel the need to pack him a lunch. He doesnt understand why his confusion causes y/n such a blush for a good five minutes. By the time he remembers the cultural significance they already left. He texts them something between sweet and formal. At noon (though I think he does have a tendency to skip lunch to work) he opens it and finds a little love note. He feels a lot of things at once and just like him ends up very smug

Franziska is silent for a second. It's not that she understands the implications, it completely flies over her head. No shes quiet cause she believes she should be taking care of you and not vice versa. Then she tells y/n to set it on the table, and is very confused when they leave the room practically skipping. It isn't until shes having lunch and her brother and gumshoe walk into the room to give her paperwork does she understand. Her brother asks her were she got it (idk if she's a good cook or would bother learning Japanese cooking) and when she relays your confounding behavior miles has the nerve to laugh. Then gumshoe surprisingly explains it to her. She turns pink and carefully opens it. Sure enough theres a love note in a sealed bag to keep it clean. That evening she buys a locket.

You have to know Diego for a very long time before he let's you cook for him. And he will never again accept open drinks from anyone. So y/n ever the sweetie invites him over in the early morning and hopes it doesnt irritate him. ( it doesnt cause hes already normally there). When he shows up y/n invites him in and leads him to the kitchen and they cook together so he can see whats in everything. He doesnt admit it but it makes him feel like they're married. It's when she hands him not his lunch but a bottled coffee still sealed does he go from crushing to love. Though he didnt like the extra sugar and milk in Japanese bottled coffee, they validated his trauma and therefore is not getting rid of him now.

Dahlia is an odd case. She pretends to not understand. She laughs her laugh like silver bells and thanks them as sweet as she can but I dont think she actually eats it. She worries shes been found out. That your trying to poison her. I can see her being better safe than sorry. Still she opens it to take a picture to post on her social media and sees the love note. She reads it once then again. And smiles sly. Her plan was working

Iris on the other hand completely understands and let's you know she knows. She asks if their seriously ok with dating someone already under oaths and vows. If thier ok respecting such boundaries. When y/n nods she begins to cry. At lunch time when she opens it she begins to cry again for two reasons

1) it's made specifically with her eating restrictions in mind. Y/n did their research

And

2) the love note. Oh goodness the love note. Never before has such a small paper made a girl so happy.

Wocky feels guilty that you pulled the bento thing first. His parents are Japanese and run a cafe and he couldn't make you a bento. When he voices his concerns and they take it as him accepting the confession and kiss him he feels a little better. He normally eats what his parents make for lunch but today. Is different. When he finds the love note he cries. He feels safe with s/o for the first time. Alita never wrote love notes or cooked lunches.

Mia the sweet women she is, flushed but tries to stay somewhat level headed, somewhat her normal level of cool. She sets it on her desk and takes y/n into her arms. She doesn't ask if they mean it cause shes scared they dont. That...it would destroy her, so she doesnt give them a chance. She would return the favor the next day but imagine be honest. I dont think she can cook either. She keeps the love note with everything else that reminds her if y/n. In a jewelry box under a floorboard.

Klavier doesnt understand it.... Much like franziska, he has no clue. But In a way he does? He knows this is something y/n put time and effort and money into, all for him. So he accepts it, calling y/n beautiful in the process. He doesnt get the fact that it was a confession...at first. Then he Googles what it means and sure enough it was a confession. And hes relieved cause he had accepted it and complimented them. He had agreed to their confession.

(before anyone says it, yes, I know Kristoph isn’t actually German, but I don’t care. Capcom can rip my “the Gavins are German” headcanon from my cold, dead hands)

Aight, so, ya girl is back. I’m gonna keep the ask box closed for a bit until I clear out all the asks I have (and finish a request) so please be patient. Thank you!

Damon: Doesn’t get it right away, but thinks it’s sweet that you made him lunch. He may google it later assuming he knows how to use google or ask someone about it, which is how he finds out the meaning behind it. Rather than make you a bento box in return, he’ll get you a bouquet of roses and invite you to join him for dinner instead. Between the roses, though, you’ll find a cute little love note with a smiley face scribbled onto it.

Shelly: He’s been around the block a few times, so he likely knows what it means. He’ll thank you and give you a peck on the cheek, promising to make you lunch as well. Once he finishes eating, he’ll put the note somewhere safe so he can reread it whenever he wants.

Matt: Has a security guard try it before he does, for safety reasons. Once he sees how upset you are by that, he’ll apologize and ask you to explain the meaning behind it (he knows he fucked up lmao). After you explain it, he’ll apologize (while being so fucking smug internally) and thank you for the lunch. He can’t cook to save his life, so don’t expect him to return the favor, but he will leave you a little note where you can find it; something along the lines of “I love you, dude <3“.

Kristoph: Prides himself on knowing a little about everything, so for him not to know the meaning behind your gift is unlikely. He’ll happily accept it and give you a gentle kiss on the forehead, all while hiding how smug he feels. He’ll also give you bento box in return, but with German cooking instead of Japanese. Oh, and that little love note you put in there? Expect to find a three page-long love letter in your lunch.

Ray: Pretty knowledgeable about romantic traditions around the world, so the chances of him getting it are pretty high. He’ll thank you for it rather sheepishly, as this is one of the few times you’ll get to see him flustered. Once he reads the note, though, he’ll pull you into a big hug, tears brimming at the corners of his eyes. Afterwards, he’ll immediately set out to make you a bento box in return, or take you out to dinner if you prefer.

Sebastian: Bless his dense heart, he’s clueless. He’ll be very thankful though, and promise to make you something in return (despite his nonexistent cooking skills). He’ll likely eat it at work and brag about how you made it for him, which is when Miles steps in to explain the meaning behind it. That + the love note is enough to make him cry tears of joy, and he’ll tackle you in a hug the moment he gets the chance to.

Simon K: Doesn’t know how to feel at first because he’s never had someone make him lunch before. Once he sees the note inside, though, he realizes what it means and becomes even more emotionally confused than before. He’ll thank you, rather awkwardly, and promise to make something for you. He’s not much of a wordsmith but he’ll still add a note, expressing how grateful he is for the lunch.

Katherine: Will be on the verge of tears when you give her the bento box, and will flat-out start crying when she reads the love note. She’ll cling to you, thanking you profusely and promising to make you one as well. She keeps her word and makes you a wonderful bento box the very next day. Instead of a love note, however, you’ll receive a song she wrote about you (and she’ll even sing it to you while you eat).

Bobby: Another very dense yandere who is definitely going to get scolded by Blackquill for not understanding what your gift means. He’ll make up for it though, by going above and beyond to make you the best bento box you’ve ever eaten (it won’t be the prettiest and he’ll likely have burned something, but it’s the thought that counts, right?). He’ll also keep your love note on his bedside table so he can read it every night before bed and every morning when he wakes up.

Simon B: He’s a huge weeaboo Japanese cultural enthusiast, so he’ll get it right away. He’ll tease you about it and act cocky as usual, but in reality, he’s trying to hide the very obvious blush on his face. He’ll keep your note safely tucked away in his coat pocket for whenever he wants to reread it. He won’t return the favor right away, though. Instead, he’ll give it to you when you least expect it in order to fluster you.

______

- Mod Dollie

[deeeelightfuldee]

Are you better at cooking dinners or making cakes/biscuits/sweets? baking definitely. I want to get more comfortable cooking.

Have you ever cut someone else’s hair? yes. I used to be pretty good at doing my brothers hair-- even the fading. But I’m sure I’ve forgotten it all by now.

Who was the last guest in your house and what were they staying for? probably my sister or my nephews.

How many long term relationships have you been in? blegh. not many. Whenever I’d know that it didnt have long term potential, id drop it. no sense dragging out the inevitable.

Do you sleep with all the lights out, or do you leave a lamp or even the television on? so for the longest time I kept my room super dark. I slept well. once miller died and kile broke my heart, I couldn’t sleep without the tv playing. I needed to hear something calming and voices talking so I wouldn’t be left with my thoughts. I still can’t turn it off.

Who is one person you have forgiven, but still have not “forgotten” what they have done? i think its easy to say “forgive and forget” but the reality is that once we have endured trauma we don’t easily forget. I think its kind of unrealistic. I’m trying to forgive kile but thats going to take.. i dont know how long. As for what it was... it was just betrayal.. lying. for six+ years. lots of laughing at me. 

Are you a fan of Lana Del Rey? I like some of her songs.

Do you know your blood type? o+

Do you know your mother’s birthday? Yes. its coming up. 

Have you ever been pregnant? I dont think so. I was really late after my assault but who knows.

How old were you when you first went on a plane? like 7ish

Have you ever had to take out a loan for anything? Yeah, student loans. 15k feels so daunting right now.

Are both of your blood parents still in your life? One is. My mom.

When was the last time you went apple picking? highschool maybe?

Someone asked you what you wanted, what would you say? money.. or a trip.

Have you ever been drunk at school or work? definitely not. 

How many bedrooms are in your house? four. 

Are you smart about computers? I know some stuff.

Have you ever played Just Dance for Wii? oh heck’n yeah

Do you own a Xbox 360? I had one from my brother for a little while but I traded it for the gamecube since Kile was going to send me one of the 15 he had lol. That didn’t end up happening, but its OK i really dont need more gaming.

Would you ever do a sex tape for a million dollars? oooooooo.. probably not.

So, do you need a nap? all day is full of naps to try and get over this.

What would you rather be doing? school

What sport are you the best at? maybe volleyball or swimming

Do you have a little sister? What’s her name? Nope, im the baby. 

Do you complain a lot? no, i try not to. I find complaining to be the most unattractive and yet common human trait and while there are definitely situations worthy of complaining, most of the time it just makes a situation worse than it actually was.

Would you rather go to an authentic haunted house or an ancient temple? temple

Do you like fruity or minty gum? definitely minty

Are you looking forward to any day of this month? i was really looking forward to Kile’s birthday on monday, but since we arent talking anymore then there is no joy in that. all the other special dates have been ruined by covid.

Have you ever gotten detention? Nope. homeschoolers and detention arent a thing. 

Is there a traumatic event that you’ve experienced that’s changed your life? oh sure. heartbreak, deaths, assaults, etc.

Do you buy a majority of your clothes from a certain store, or do you just pick out items of clothing you could see yourself wearing, not caring about the store it came from? no, i can’t be super picky because not every store carries clothing long enough for me.

Have any of the artists you’re fond of released new albums recently? i havent got a clue

Would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet? I mean I’m very fond of cats & dogs

Ever cried so much you threw up? this is what happened the whole 2-3 weeks following finding out about Kile.

Who is your best guy friend? I suppose now that would be Nathan

What do you two do when you hang out? drives, game nights, get food/drinks, or just talk.

What is a movie that you thought you would hate but you ended up loving? Her

Do you even like horror movies? not particularly. I’ll watch them if someone else wants to but its not my preference.

Do you live in the country? i live in the suburbs i suppose.

What is your favorite accent? Some southern and British accents. <same ... i have no idea how I made the font like this.

Have you ever had a boyfriend your parents didn’t like? Not that I can think of.

Do you drink Pepsi or Coke? diet coke

What do you plan to do on your 21st birthday? my family celebrated during the day and then I think nathan took me out on the town

Do you have any person in your family with an addiction to beer? nope.

Do you take a lot of pictures? man. this question is hard. I used to love taking pictures of myself. I had much more self confidence and some of it was because kile LOVED my selfies -- or so he said. and I just had so much fun doing that. Since the heartbreak, I’ve maybe taken 10 selfies. I just don’t have any self confidence in my looks anymore. its so different now. most of my pictures now are of other people or scenery.

What kind of face wash do you use? cerave when I want to. otherwise i use water and a very particular type of fabric. 

Does drama always seem to follow you? No, i dont think so.

Does anybody in your family race? like cars? running? no.

Are you closer to your mom or dad? My mom.

How much money did you used to get from the ”tooth fairy?” I think i got it like 2x and it was a dollar.

Do you have a laptop or desktop? Laptop.

Do you like your parents? i love my mom.

Do you secretly like someone? No.

Would you ever date your best male friend? I don’t see any romantic feelings developing between nathan and I

What are you currently listening to? I have gilmore girls on.

Do you want to be single? oooof. Um. I am torn on this subject. On the one hand, i really am ready to be loved, held, protected, cared for, etc. I love the idea of building a life together with someone and us both protecting our unit. I miss supporting, cherishing, loving on someone. Yet on the other hand, im fine being single. I have so much insecurity about myself lately that I dk that anyone else needs to deal with that baggage. Idk

Did you go out or stay in last night? I stayed in. ill be staying in for some time.

Have you pretended to like someone? romantically, no. professionally, yes.

How is your heart lately? Sad. heavy. 

Are you wearing socks? not at the moment. 

What do people call you? Di, diana, dee, ana, di-nan-na, dine-uh, deenah.

Do you get stressed out easily? no, I really dont

Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance? yes

What is wrong with you right now? im sick. im heartbroken.

Do you own something from Hot Topic? not that I know of. if I do, it’d be from like middle school. I never shopped there but people tended to give gifts from there.

Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone? Alone. maybe I havent found the right sort of person to share a bed with.

Do you still talk to the person you last made out with? No.

Have you ever seen your best friend cry? Yes, several times. 

Did you get any compliments today? No.

Have you ever gone to a beach? many many many times.

What would you say if someone asked you to get high right now? not my thing. at all.

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason? Yes.

Have you ever done volunteer work just because you wanted to? Yes.

Do you have long nails? they are healthy length. I want to grow them out a bit more. 

Do you like the gender you are? Yeah.

Do you generally look nice in photos? Not anymore

Have you ever had a stick insect as a pet? no haha

What colour are your father’s eyes? Blue.

If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer? uhhhhm, blue october

Would you ever get into a long distance relationship? maybe not anymore. 

What’s your favorite hot beverage? hot chocolate from dunkin

Did you ever play an instrument? If so what? i did. no comment.

Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents? oooooohhhhhhhhh man i love both.

Do you think you’re important? I mean i offer some importance to this world but eh.

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? Hmm no idea.

Have you been diagnosed with any mental disorders? no

Have you ever moved to another state or country? If so, how did it feel to be new? No.

Do you know how to properly eat food with chopsticks? Nope.

What was the first thing you ate today? I haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday

If you could spend the day, doing absolutely anything, with anyone, anywhere, what would it be like? for the longest time it was to spend the day driving aimlessly and getting food and talking about everything and nothing with Kile. now, its just.. idunno. blank.

If I were to ask you how you are doing, and you were only able to answer completely honestly, what would come out? I’m not doing well.

What is the one thing that you have been avoiding that you should do? There’s a few things related to school.

Is there anything that you wish you could take back? not really, no.

What, in your mind, could make you truly happy? this whole covid nonsense going away, heartbreak to soothe, and my miller back.

If you could change one conversation in your life, what would you say differently? Would it have REALLY made any difference? i dont know. 

When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it? I just changed it up so itll be a bit.

Do people normally say you’re a fast typist, or are you rather slow? Fast.

Have you ever been considered the ‘smartest person in school?’ yes. several times.

How many drugs are in your system? lol lots of meds rn to kick this. usually none.

What’s on your schedule for tomorrow? the same as today.

Do you currently have any bite marks/hickeys on your body? No. i dont like the idea of bite marks but hickeys were fun for a time. in not visible areas tho.

Do you call anyone baby? Not anymore.

What’s your current mood? Bleh.

What were you doing before filling out this survey? Watching gilmore girls

How late did you stay up last night? I took PM meds at i wanna say 8? maybe 7? I don’t remember.

When was the last time you cried really hard? its been a few weeks since ive cried about Kile. I’m in the numb stage.

Is your hair longer than your shoulders? hahahahahahah

[lord-king-saint]

✨7TH HOUSE SHADOW WORK (PART ONE)✨

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DISCLAIMER: Depending on your level of integration, you may not relate to these descriptions of the signs. Without integrating the sister sign, there are deficits in the personality. As we integrate our sister signs' qualities, we tend to relate better to the world.

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✨aries: energetic and forceful mars rarely allows others to influence you or "impress" upon you. it guards you with its fiery armor against absorbing too many perspectives-- and rightly so! people who juggle too many perspectives always vaccilate and diffuse their energies! it can feel like a betrayal to you when someone is always taking the middle-ground. a warrior has to attach to its goal, or they die! so why are so many fools getting the jump on you? whats up with those "certain people" who get under your skin and drive you mad? how do they charm you and expose you so easily? its their ability to "drink in" your perspective. they allow themselves to be impressed upon by you, but they use that data like an artist. yeah, their energy is diffuse, and thats why you are so easily drawn into them, like everyone else. you may be jealous of people who are charismatic and very liked. aries can be popular and well-liked too, but its usually because your audience is compatible with your forceful energy-- or they like you despite it! but venusians win hearts, and relationships, because they make room for others in their psyche. can you make room? or does it feel like obliteration?

✨taurus: you see no need to rennovate your entire personality. youve carefully crafted yourself and your surroundings, based on what you think is beautiful, and valuable, and conserves the most energy. you dont have time to constantly deconstruct and rebuild yourself. even though you want to improve in some areas, you won't throw the baby out with the bath water. after all, you have earthy goals to achieve. youre comfortable in your skin and your rituals work for you, because theyre tailored to your delicate sensual nature. you dont want to be ruffled, or hurried, or over-stimulated. thats why those "certain people" irk you so much. theyre always trying to penetrate your exterior and reveal these deep truths about you. whats their angle? why do they want to unravel you? it feels like they just want to tear you apart, and then be the ones to put you together again. it feels like a power play-- and furthermore, it sounds exhausting. you dont need to expose the deep dark motivations inside you. youre doing just fine because you march steady and refined toward your goal. thats why youre confused when people say youre oblivious. when people confide in you, and you dont investigate the secret longings of their hearts, and the bitter past that forged them, they say they feel unseen. you want someone around because theyre "valuable", but when you dont merge with their inner world, youre treating them like an object. you prefer to build trust slowly. you notice that a person repeatedly respects your boundaries, so you let them in. but intimacy demands something deeper. they want to know that the deepest and most vulnerable parts of themselves are safe with you. are they? are their deep and messy hearts safe with you? or they just your "objects"?

✨gemini: youre like a surfer, arent you? it doesnt matter what the current is doing, as long as it gives you that wave! that moment of excitement and freedom! i mean, obviously you study the water, and know which waves will give you the most thrill, and you can probably anticipate when a good wave is coming-- or maybe you dont surf, but, you treat information this way. you know the people who have the best stories. you can sniff them out, you're drawn to them, and you know how to stay engaged with them-- until you don't want that anymore! until then, you download everything you can learn, to redistribute to others later. youre a fabulous messenger. collecting fascinating knowledge, person by person, media by media, and re-telling them in glib and colorful ways, is what maintains your excitement and thrill. your heart adores networking, and you love being at the center of the web you weave-- but then you meet those self-righteous types. those "certain people" who have actually been on journeys. they don't swim in the same surf, waiting for waves. they dont collect stories and glimpses of experiences. they arent messengers. they venture into the unknown themselves, for their own experience or vocation or belief system. these people know themselves. theyre the blunt types who scare people away sometimes. "but those people might've had good stories!" you cry. you hate their candor and their self-righteousness, but you cant help that you love their stories the most. theyre so knowledgable, like a teacher or guru. they may even make you jealous, because they arent just telling stories-- theyre telling experiences. they make you want to go on a journey and have an experience too! you want their self-knowledge and expanded worldview-- but, that would require that you choose a direction. it would mean starting your own story, and commiting to it step by step, rather than waiting in the surf for a thrill. which direction lies your story? can you devote yourself to it?

✨cancer: youve seen the world outside and its scary. everyone is so changeable, and they all want something from you. they all have angles-- but you know who didnt have an angle? mother. she didnt need anything from you, she just adored you and held you and fed you yummy meals and listened to you sympathetically. she would never exploit you. she only wanted the best for you. or, maybe your family wasnt like that, so you built your private world around that loss. you save the photographs of being unloved, and insulate your heart with familiar, emotional security. your pets and plants love you unconditionally, and so do your friends. actually, you make sure that every person in your life is "safe", which is why you tested them and only slowly let them in. you approached sideways, indirectly, but eventually the faithful made it into your den, where you adore each other and feed each other and protect each other's secrets. you take their photographs and hang them in your private world, and you pray to the moon that you dont hurt you or leave you one day, like the others. when the others left, it was too painful to put into words (even though you tried) and you continue to build your private world around that loss. so the scariest people are the insensitive people. those "certain people" who arent ruled by their feelings and they operate exclusively in the public world. whats so good about the public world? sure, you play in the system to give yourself security, but why bother being ambitious when the private world is so much safer? these people are disciplined and want to master the outside world, and even though you feel unnerved by them, theyre sensible providers of security, and security has always appealed to you. theyre brave and stoic on the outside, because they wear the mask of courage to provide for their families-- like an archetypal father. sure, theyve suffered, but their suffering and failures are what galvanizes their self-respect, and motivates them to try again. their resilience appeals to you, draws you like a magnet, but you resent their emotional strength because it makes them seem insensitive. but in order to accomplish our goals in the world, we have to be disciplined, put our feelings to the side, and be willing to fail. are you brave enough to climb the mountain? can you approach the world directly? the public world can be a scary place, but when you have courage and a wish in your heart, it makes for better photographs.

✨leo: your heart is a stage, and your beloved audience loves your warmth and glamor. youre so talented, so dignified, and you have that accessible "older sibling" aura that wins people's hearts. basically youre blessed, and your heart soars whenever you receive applause. like a good actor, people dont always know the work youve put into your identity-- unless, of course, its part of the act-- but youre not pretending! its just that applause affirms your existence, so naturally everything revolves around that. you love your audience and you cant imagine life without being seen and praised. humiliation could destroy you, but you will always rise like the graceful pheonix before a new audience, to dazzle and impress and entertain again. you have infinite creative potential inside of you, a kaledioscope of color and expression is at your fingertips. thats why you cannot stand those "certain people" who come around to expose your ego. these people are usually intellectuals who are penetrating and insightful, and they always try to bring you down a peg. when you tell a problematic joke on stage, theyre always advocating for the audience and viewing your act in an idealistic lense. "its just art!" you cry. "and its my art! so if you dont like it, you can leave!" but when the audience leaves, it always unearths your insecurities. how are these people so in-touch with your audience? how do they forecast the audience's needs so accurately with their insights? youre the one on stage, but these intellectuals know the rhythms of the future, and theyre forcing you to step up and change. you recognize their genius and want it for yourself, because your heart is a stage, and theater is about the interplay between the actor and the audience. can you use your heart to feel into the hearts of the collective? can you change with the age? is that something you even want?

✨virgo: your attention to detail is truly a gift, and it enriches everyone around you-- even if they dont notice. you can put your ego to the side and really analyze what truly needs to be done, and then you do it, without fuss. once you find the flaw with your eye for detail, you uproot it. even when its thankless work, you are a major service to those around you because you keep things efficient and organized, just like your own bodies and minds. when things are unclean, you keep them clean, just like your unconscious. in fact, you regularly go into the basement of your mind to take an inventory of your compulsions, obsessions, and needs. you may appear neurotic to others, and you may feel that way too! your eye for detail can sometimes paralyze you with all the ways you need to improve yourself. even when it comes to others, it may be hard not to see flaws and want to perfect them. it may be hard to relate to people outside of this ritual because youre so invested in the routine of that role. when your eye for detail sees all the flaws, how can you not aspire to a future of perfection? its hard work, but everyone should be working to be better, right? thats why "certain people" who are oblivious to their own flaws bother you. everyone has a responsibility to improve, but then you meet those people who laze about and dont improve themselves. and, you notice that they dont try to improve other people either! they accept people as they are, and you resent how others gravitate to them. you assume that theyre coddling them-- but with your eye for detail, you notice something. you notice that people around them slowly heal and improve by their influence, by some strange alchemy! and you cant trace back how it was done! because they accepted them as they were-- they changed, for the better. you also notice that it works personally for those people too. somehow, by not worrying and analyzing, by withdrawing from their obsessions and escaping into art or distraction, occasionally things work out for them! it doesnt happen enough to quantify, but the numerous occasions where inaction breeds positive results astounds you! how do they do that? how do they give their problems over to some higher force by escaping? you can barely escape your own mind without feeling guilty! and you notice that their ability to escape balances their ability to ground in the moment, especially with others. it seems so disorderly and contradictory-- but it works. how can inaction and acceptance change your life too? how would your loved ones improve if you accepted them as they are? can you tolerate uncertainty enough, to reap the rewards of acceptance?

[teddibearclub]

my favourite things kpop boys have said:

eric: a long time ago i dressed up as a princess but now i want to dress up as-

kevin: a prince?

eric: no, geodude from pokémon

-

kevin: i don’t know what a het is

-

20 seconds of silence

jisung (skz): gay!

-

kevin: van gogh was found wigless and shook in his grave, thank you for that narrative.

-

mark lee: i feel like the possibility of those possibilities being possible is just another possibility that can possibly happen

-

johnny: i was thinking we could also go for like frozen yogurt

mark completely changing the tone straight faced: oh i’m not a yogurt fan, i can’t eat yogurt

johnny: no it’s like ICEcream

mark: i know

johnny: ok nevermind

-

mark lee to a random person : excuse me do you know this song “party on the city where the heat is on all night in the beach where the beat is on, welcome to miami”

the person:

mark lee: i’m sorry ok

*later*

mark lee: hey do you guys know this song-

-

mark lee: wow this country music is making this texas feel more like texas, even more like texas

-

mark lee: my fingers aren’t mine

-

jaemin: then i’m jin ramyum

dream: oiiiiii

renjun: i feel like dying

dream:

renjun: what’s wrong?

-

mark lee to a squirrel: check this out hey buddy aw come on man waaeyay

-

mark: woah it’s actually different from santa monica beach because i always thought that all beaches were the same and it actually isn’t

johnny: that’s horrible how you think that

mark: i mean like in a way you know it’s just like water and a shore and then sand but now it’s different

-

renjun: in the case that this works out for me, i am going to go to the moon. i don’t want to live on this earth.

-

ten: *does a cute thing then looks at renjun* why are you looking at your hyung like that?

renjun: i’m scared

-

doni: can you do something like jeno did?

renjun: i don’t really understand korean that well

doni: suddenly? chenle, is there anything you can do?

chenle: i don’t understand...

*renjun and chenle high five*

-

renjun: i have an animal that i’m afraid of and i don’t have plans on revealing what it is

johnny: why? what animal is it

jeno: tell us!

renjun: it’s humans

-

renjun on weekly idol: i’m confident in korean

renjun anytime he doesn’t want to answer something: i’m not good at korean

renjun fluent in korean: korean is hard for me! :)

mr fluent in korean speaking in korean: i can’t speak korean though?

renjun to dream who know he’s fluent: i’m bad a korean you know

-

mark: we gathered up together in the early morning it’s nice

renjun: as we’ve been together since early in the morning, i’m tired of being together now

-

renjun: emergency exits remind me of nctzens

jeno: *spitting out his water*

-

renjun: today though such a fun program like idol room, i learned that the world is a cold and unfair place

-

mark: there’s so much generation difference between us

renjun pushing mark away: let’s keep our distance then

-

renjun: i wonder what it’ll be like when i become an adult, im worried i feel like i’ll have to be more responsible, but seeing mark.. there isn’t much to it, i mean he can drink now but that’s about it

-

yukhei: you see i’m born in the 80s so i don’t know about slang

renjun pointing to kun: what about that guy over there?

kun: *ready to murder*

-

sicheng: the scene where i appear-

renjun: YOU IMMEDIATELY DISAPPEAR

-

renjun to jeno: because you are even less fun than usual i am giving you this award

-

renjun: we’re so boring so fans must be pressing all the hearts out of boredom

-

renjun: so if i don’t win i have to pair up with the mc?

mc: yes

renjun: i should pull myself together then

-

mc: why are you so good at korean?

renjun: i’m not good at korean

doni: *grabs renjun because he’s a lying brat*

renjun: *happily showing the camera he is being attacked* why aren’t you fixing my clothes?

doni: *fixing renjuns shirt because he’s a king and it’s what he deserves*

-

renjun after losing every game: this is like we’re in a movie maybe there will be a big plot twist at the end

doni: there won’t

renjun: as expected from a biased pair of people

-

renjun and chenle talking

jisung: what are you guys saying?

renjun: if you want to know learn the language

-

mark: do we get a prize?

mc: we have an expensive gift prepared

renjun: now it’s worth doing!

-

chenle: wow my chinese is so good

renjun: nice! did you forget you’re chinese?

-

i cant remember who said this probably renjun: i think nct dream, you can say we are kind of a fun team, but when i look at the hyung team i feel frustrated, please gain strength hyungs

-

mark: ive been wearing the shoes renjun made, they’re very comfortable

renjun: i didnt make them comfortable i just drew on them

-

renjun: a spoiler? what if i get fired from the company?

donghyuck: get fired? us? get fired? lmao

-

kevin: jacob i’ve been waiting forever for this moment

jacob: waiting for what? waiting for me?

kevin: honey i see you everyday

-

jacob: the scent of autumn, the scent of leaves

kevin: we’re indoors but okay

-

kevin: kid, mama’s gotta dance

-

renjun: *speaks in chinese*

jeno: wow you are so good at chinese, did u study it a lot?

renjun: yes

-

ten: oh this is not icecream this is butter

-

johnny: there’s this thing too where girls call guys as “oh daddy” but not like a real dad

-

tens birthday note to johnny: i wanna have xxxx with you fatass! love you forever darling

mark: i don’t think we should read that

-

donghyuck: a six-pack is too heavy for me, so now i only walk around with a one-pack. i leave the other five behind.

-

nct: goodnight

mark: don’t let the bed bugs bite

ten: open your eyes

nct: NO CLOSE YOUR EYES! CLOSE YOUR EYES!

-

johnny: my dad knew i likes beans so like he was playing with beans, and he dropped it and then he dropped it on a rock and it slid and then hot water started falling, and then coffee

-

host: wow your english is really good

johnny: i’m from chicago

-

johnny: i chose fried mackerel, mackarol, mackarel, the fish, mackerol, mackerel, mackarel *cute shrug*

-

jungwoo: trip to space

johnny: you wanna go home?

mark: that’s where he came from

jungwoo: my friends are there

mark: that’s his home town

-

jacob: i cant compare to him so-

kevin: it’s okay jacob everyone’s an artist in their own way

-

kevin: fun fact i used to do gymnastics

jacob: SAME

kevin: oh really!!

jacob: and then i quit :)

-

chenle: talking to reporters-

jisung: harry potter

jisung in excitement: ha-REPORTER

-

kevin in distress: jacob you have no beyoncé in your library, what is this? WHAT IS THIS!?

jacob: no i respect her i love her music

kevin making a scissor motion with his hands: you know what this is? scissors. to cut our friendship.

jacob: why are you exposing me like that

kevin: i’m just kidding, if beyoncé can forgive jayz i can forgive you jacob”

-

kevin: jacob came back from canada with a suitcase full of cereal

-

donghyuck: oh canada, this is korea man don’t forget okay.

-

mark lee: wait chips means fries right? 

-

kevin: sam if you’re out there i’m still waiting for you to *cough* TEXT ME BACK

-

jacob: and jeff i love you

tbz: awww

kevin: mY nAmE jEfF

-

chenle pointing at a roller coaster: do you wanna ride?

jisung: hell no i’ll die

-

chenle: jisung which sunglasses are better these or the other ones

jisung: both are mediocre

-

doyoung: that’s a difficult question because i don’t read

-

fan: comments something about renjun stealing their heart

renjun: i don’t know how to react to these types of comments... why are you all like this? everyone let’s self reflect...

-

renjun: pretend we’re close in front of the camera

donghyuck: we’re supposed to be close friends right? this is going to be hard 

-

ten: xiaojun stop being dramatic challenge

-

taemin from shinee: *singing replay by shinee*

yukhei: that’s not it

yukhei *showing taemin from shinee how to sing a shinee song*

mark: *dying in the background*

-

bambam talking about got7’s first album: you know the time we thought we was so cool, we was so good, but then we look back and it’s like what the hell

-

jae: would you rather wake up in someone’s body or wake up without being able to communicate?

brian: i’d rather not communicate

jae: then you can’t sing

brian: i’m fine with that, my parents gifted me this body

day6: ??? the fuck ???

sungjin: what if you wake up in JYPs body one day?

day6:

day6: what about it. i love it. that’s would be lovely

jae: we love you boss 👍

-

jae: what would you forget?

dowoon: i ate some ants as a kid

wonpil: i ate pill bugs

sungjin: i ate soap

wonpil: everyone’s eaten soap, what about crayons?

jae: crayons???

wonpil: they looked delicious when i was a kid

brian: i’ve eaten them

sungjin: they must’ve tasted good

-

dowoon: *stuffing marshmallows in his mouth*

brian: no you can do more STOP CHEWING PUT IT IN

dowoon muffled: i think i’m going to die

brian: you think you’re going to die??

brian smiling: sorry he might die , he might choke to death

jae: *reaching over to stuff more marshmallows in dowoons mouth*

-

brian gets a dare to sing everything he says: dare or dare~

dowoon: oooowwooo~

brian: this is my dare don’t take it from me~

-

q: can you name my bird

renjun: ...if i say to name it “bird” will u want to hit me

[sargentr]

so i reread the dream thieves a while back and i wrote down some stuff i hadn’t really noticed/paid that much attention to. some of them are mere observations others are just me. Fangirling. as one does:

* ronan's first love was his family

* adam tried his best to make things work with blue, just like everything else he had tried in his life

* gansey is very well aware of his privilege and wealth 

* ronan has two weaknesses: niall lynch and adam parrish

* noah was there for ronan is ways not even ronan realized

* when ronan was filled with anger for a reason i cant remember, he relaxed a bit when gansey, beside him, answered his phone and said "hey" into it, meaning it was adam. (this is from ronans pov) like!!! theyre so comfortable around each other can i leave

* adam was so furious at gansey for thinking he had made the st agnes bill easier for him that he didnt realize that it had ronan written all over it

* gansey was such a light hearted and carefree person that there was not a single person in aglionby who did not know who he was. it is described that while others tried to fit in aglionby, aglionby fit perfectly in gansey. he was the type of person who the teachers would hold for a second after class to show him the article they thought he might like. HE’S BABY.

* gansey and ronan's relationship was not based on communication.

* adam always thought how beautiful all of gansey's things were.

* ronan lynch was one of those things

* gansey often reminded himself how niall lynch's death affected ronan

* ronan would rather die than kill adam

* the image of ronan trying (and lying) to take his life was scarred into gansey like ink

* gansey and ronan fought a night creature and fit perfectly as a team (gansey's pov)

* clue number two of non heterosexual ronan niall lynch: "(blue) wore a dress ronan thought looked like a lampshade. whatever sort of lamp it belonged on, gansey clearly wished he had one. ronan wasn't a fan of lamps."

* ronan lynch is completely and utterly himself the first time he steps foot in the barns

* RONAN REFERRING TO ADAM AS EINSTEIN

* ronan has no chill whatsoever omg when they're in the barns and checking to see if the animals are still alive blue asks ronan to check some of them and he replies to her and adam "you two poverty twins do it"

* confirmed: ronan lynch is a complete cupcake (eg: pressing the small mouse to his cheek to check the heartbeat)

* confirmed: richard gansey is a bigger cupcake for smiling ear to ear while doing the same

* !!!! "and it was his smile that buried ronan"!!!! (referring to gansey and the mouse)

* "... adam replied, his henrietta accent sneaking out, betraying his fatigue. it was something deeper." (ronan's pov)

* second confirm: ronan lynch is a Softie™ (eg: when they were about to leave the barns but ronan whispered so just gansey heard "can i go and see mom?" HE IS ALSO BABY

* OKAY BUT GANSEY AND RONAN THIS ENTIRE BOOK: "i remember when you used to smell like this" referring to when they enter the main house at the barns.

* "ronan loved it so much. he nearly couldn't bare it. he wanted to destroy something." (((this is about the barns. protect this sunshine)))

* when blue saw a picture of a bird in the barns and asked, "are these vultures or crows?" and adam and ronan replied at the same time, "vultures" "crows" NERDS

* "i am being perfectly fucking civil" still to this day, the best thing ronan lynch has ever said.

* "ronan looked at gansey. that look, blue thought. ronan lynch would do anything for gansey" claps slowly

* BONUS: "i probably would, too." thought blue

* matthew lynch was the only thing that made ronan come back himself

* niall left ronan (and only ronan) his entire property

* gansey shops when he's sad

* gansey and adam sharing a LOOK when orla comes in with skin showing

* blue had very few skin showing and gansey wanted to tell he how much he liked hers and not orlas, but then thinking "that's adam's job" what a bean

* how extra can ronan lynch get (a series): making a complete SCENE while opening his car door, sitting inside, closing the door, driving away

* gansey protesting so blue wouldnt go inside the water (bc baby boy probably couldnt handle blue seminaked) and using "you wont be able to see without your eyes getting irritated" as a point

* gansey getting all flustered and reminding himself he'd been looking at orla's naked body for so long but also: HER BIKINI IS SO ORANGE

* clue number two of non heterosexual ronan niall lynch: laughing his ass off about ganseys reaction of orla and said orange bikini

* jealous little blue being furious at gansey for just looking at her

* ronan's pulse fastening when thinking about kavinsky

* ronan smiling to himself and only doing so because there was no one to see it

* noah and blue holding hands at monmouth when gansey and ronan arent there okay look at those two

* "sometimes i pretend im him" "which part?" "alive" PROTECT NOAH CZERNY

* when blue was laying on ganseys bed she though "i have a crush on richard gansey" and the following "i dont have a crush on adam parrish"

* okay but the whole kissing scene is adorably cute and the best part of tdt

* BLUE THINKING "oh, this is what i can't have"

* MATTHEW AND RONAN VISITING THE BARNS AND BOTH OF THEM JUST BEING ADORABLE WITH AURORA AND EACH OTHER

* ronan racing kavinsky and having so many mixed feelings

* adam feeling misplaced in DC and constantly thinking of this fathers abuse and I Cried

* adam and gansey fighting and uhhh sorry dick but DAMN adam

* ronan dreaming he's in kavinskys car and not knowing if he loved it or hated it

* blue's voice over the phone taking gansey's mind off the fight he had with adam

* gansey listing the things ronan is inside his mind so he would be angry at him

* "ronan had charm. it was just buried deep. very deep."

* blue fucking sargent being the badass feminist she is when it didnt occur to adam that maybe blue was into politics

* "you wouldnt have gone someplace without gansey. you two make a grand couple. kiss him!" blue giving zero fucks to adam being douchely sexist

* okay first fuck you adam idiot parrish: "nice blue, gansey was right. you are a raging feminist" FUCK YOU

* okay adam losing his temper and literally thinking of hitting blue this is a matter of EMERGENCY

* ADAM STOP BEING A DICK OH MY GOD HE ALMOST FORCED BLUE INTO KISSING HIM THIS ISNDHDJDHDHD

* like ok i get Mans had a rough past n that violence is the only thing he knows but stief what was ur POINT with this part

* adams enemy being his anger. someone protect him from himself

* when blue and gansey are talking in the pig about adam and ganseys just full of hatred towards adam's parents, "who has he ever had to love him? ever?"

* okay but richard campbell gansey the third is a complete and utter SUNSHINE: when he's overwhelmed by blue and gets out of the pig and starts pacing and then realizing it was rudeish and APOLOGIZING like a fucking KING

* lmao gansey saying "i think he should come to terms with his sexuality" at kavinsky gift to ronan.

* "he wondered if kavinsky was gay. he wondered if she should go to the fourth of july party. he wondered where adam had gone" someone just. keep ronan close and hydrated and healthy and LET HIM BE GAY AND REST

* okay but ronan thinks about kavinsky in a matter that is completely and utterly non platonic

* "the grey man gently threw ronan across the breakfast table" nice maggie

* prepare for dialogue:

"theres nothing here k."

"theres only us. i know what you are"

"thats not enough"

"dont say dick gansey man. hes never gonna be with you. and dont tell me you dont swing that way. im in your head"

"thats not what gansey is to me"

"you didnt say you didnt swing that way"

RONAN SAID, "no, i didnt" ..... gay bitch

* ronan calling adam "adam" when he thinks they're in a dream and just then realizing he isnt

* "i know it was you. the rent, i figured it out" adam parrish just slipping information at the WRONG time

* "he was a brother to a liar and a bother to an angel, son of a dream and son of a dreamer" still to this day the prettiest thing ever

* HIS SECOND SECRET WAS ADAM PARRISH

* "adam furrowed his brows to ronan, as if sensing ronan's eyes on him. ronan looked away"

* im shook this book is so good

[theartofdreaming1]

The Taste of Something Stolen, Part 1: Beginning

Pairing: Batcat

Rating: T

Summary: Some people steal kisses. Selina Kyle is a thief by profession, she doesn’t have time for this touchy-feely stuff - if anything, she kisses in order to steal. However, whenever Bruce Wayne gets involved, her current theft usually ends up being a little bit of both.

A short series of loosely connected one-shots :)

It was Friday noon and seventeen-year-old Selina Kyle was observing the coming and goings of the Diamond District, Gotham’s financial district, her green eyes scanning the crowd for a target. So what if she was swiping some business shark’s wallets? They had their more than lucrative jobs to go to every day of their mundane lives - Selina, on the other hand, was going to be put out on the streets as soon as she was turning eighteen (not that the orphanage was a place she was gonna miss, but career opportunities were few and far between for an orphaned troublemaker from the East End - she was just making sure she had a financial cushion to fall back on when ‘Day X’ arrived.)

She had worked out a true and tested procedural method: with her backpack half open, she’d “accidentally” bump into her target (normally some boring middle-aged white man, as most of these suits were), the contents of her backpack would be sent flying across the ground, causing enough of a distraction for Selina to pick the (by now full on swearing) man’s pocket - by the time her target had finished cursing her out, Selina had safely stowed away Angry White Man’s money in her own pocket.

It wasn’t exactly the most fun method, but the satisfaction of a job well done as well as the fruits of her labor made it worth it.

This had been going on quite successfully for a couple of weeks now; so successful in fact, that Selina was getting a little bored if she was being honest with herself. Which is why Selina had decided to switch it up a little today.

Her newest mark was just now exiting Wayne Enterprises, wearing a simple, but very expensive-looking black coat and a brooding expression on his face. He appeared to be around Selina’s age and was already parading around the biggest companies in Gotham (the Rolex on his arm made it more than clear that he was not just some low-paid intern at WE) - the stark contrast between her own situation and Mr. Silver Spoon just affirmed Selina in her choice of a target: In a way, she was just leveling the playing field, if you really thought about it… She was simply… redistributing all that wealth a little among their age group...

As an added bonus, he was actually pretty handsome, something that would make the execution of her exit strategy, should she have to fall back on it, a little more bearable...

After making sure that everything was ready for her little maneuver, Selina shouldered her backpack determinedly and headed for the rich kid; apparently deep in thought, he didn’t seem aware of Selina gravitating closer and closer to him until - WHACK - they collided. Slightly stumbling backwards due to the force of their impact, Selina felt a strong, protective hand gripping her elbow - rich boy was actually making sure she wouldn’t fall (a nice, if superfluous gesture, Selina registered.) The stacks of loose papers and pens Selina had stuffed into her backpack practically exploded all over the ground. Rich boy took a closer look at her although not to see who he was going to yell at, as Selina expected him to, but to determine if she was okay. She must have looked alright to him, as he quickly withdrew his hand from her elbow, shot her a apologetic look and then went on to kneel down to gather her belongings...

Selina quickly dropped to her knees as well, grabbing for the useless notes and pencils scattered everywhere, making sure to keep up appearances.

Rich boy handed her a stack of papers, an apologetic look on his face.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going - did you just steal my wallet right now?”

The befuddled look on his face would have been amusing to Selina if this didn’t mean that she had been caught red-handed.

Before she could make a run for it, rich boy’s hand wrapped itself around her wrist - his grip this time a lot firmer than before.

“Give it back,” rich boy said - no, ordered; it wasn’t that Selina was surprised to find out that rich boy knew how to boss people around, but the authoritative tone in his voice, coupled with that steely look in his gray-blue eyes… it was a little unsettling.

But not enough to have Selina lose her composure; with a nonchalant shrug, she handed over rich boy’s wallet - it was then that she noticed the letters B and W that were engraved in the fine leather and something heavy settled in her chest.

And yet, that still didn’t keep her from getting her claws out instead of keeping her mouth shut:

“It’s not like you can’t afford it.”

Rich boy countered her provocative glare with an intensity she hadn’t been prepared for - it started off as a stern warning, but then turned into something more calculating, scrutinizing; she could feel his blue eyes scan every inch of her, taking note of her threadbare jacket and scuffed shoes.

As suddenly as it had come about, their staring contest ended.

“You’re right,” rich boy agreed calmly, opening his wallet to take out the bills inside - from what Selina could see, she would have assumed them to amount to about $500.

“I’d rather keep my wallet though - it’s a birthday gift,” rich boy told Selina sedately before holding the cash out, for her to take.

Selina just gave him a bewildered look. He was certainly the weirdest person she’d ever met. And his offer may be tempting, but she still had her pride:

“I don’t accept handouts,” she said simply, crossing her arms demonstratively.

Now it was rich boy’s turn to be perplexed.

“You would have just snagged it if I hadn’t noticed in time - but when I give it to you freely, you won’t take it?”

“I’m not just some charity case you can throw your money at, just so that you can feel like the great benefactor,” Selina replied disdainfully, “I’m not interested in money I haven’t earned.”

Rich boy seemed to consider her response earnestly. After a short moment of contemplation, he finally put his money back into his wallet and slipped it back into his coat pocket.

“Fair enough.”

Selina arched an eyebrow. She really couldn’t figure this guy out.

He gave her a shrug, “Well, don’t let me keep you from work.”

His sorry attempt at humor couldn’t conceal the disapproval embedded in his words.

Selina knew that there was no reason at all why she should care about some entitled rich kid’s opinion of her, but something about this guy just rubbed her the wrong way:

“Listen, Mr. High-And-Mighty: what I do is not so different from what all of these -” she gestured at the financial sharks roaming the plaza - “are doing here; at least I steal from the ones that can afford it.”

Rich boy put up his hands in a defensive gesture.

“I didn’t mean to be condescending and I’m not denying that you have a point about unethical business practices being a profound issue, especially in this city…”

He paused for a moment, then, an amused expression made its way unto his face:

“I guess I just don’t know what you say to a pickpocket when they decide to get back to “work”; - Break a leg?”

Selina raised an eyebrow again.

“Does this look like a theater performance to you?”

Rich boy only shrugged, a hint of a smile on his lips, before giving it another try: “Good luck?”

Now Selina was truly offended.

“I don’t need luck; I’m very good at what I do.”

He stared at her, quirking an eyebrow.

“You just got caught in the act,“ he pointed out incredulously.

Selina shrugged it off: “An outlier; doesn’t count.”

This time, a full-on smile played on his lips, “Oh, that’s how it is?”

Selina couldn’t help the pouty tone seep into her voice as she defended herself:

“People don’t just offer to help someone that ran into them! Your stupid niceness ruined my plan.”

“What was I supposed to be doing?” rich boy asked, his tone of voice indicating that he was both amused and curious.

Selina couldn’t believe that anyone could be that clueless, but she still decided to spell it out for him: “Yell at me that I should look where I’m going - add in a couple of insults and you are golden.”

“Even if I was the one who didn’t pay attention?”

Selina rolled her eyes.

“Of course.”

“Huh. I’ll keep that in mind for future reference, so as not to ruin your plan the next time around.”

Selina cocked her head to the side, the ghost of a grin on her face, “You really think I’m bold enough to attempt stealing from you again?”

Rich boy shrugged slightly, “You strike me as a very dauntless person,” he said quite matter-of-factly.

Selina smirked, taking a deliberate step forward, invading his personal space, “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

Rich boy appeared to be taken aback by her action, but he didn’t move away.

“It’s just an observation,” he said with a shrug, his voice wavering just the tiniest bit; but Selina knew that she was getting under his skin.

She tapped her chin in pretend thoughtfulness, her eyes glinting playfully.

“Hmh, there is an error in your reasoning, though.”

Rich boy knitted his brows, “What erro-”

But before he could finish his question, Selina cut him off by drawing him in for a kiss. She must have startled him for good, because it took rich boy a few seconds until hes started to respond to her lips.

Before he got too comfortable, Selina broke off the kiss, a wicked grin now adorning her face.

“You assumed I’d use the same trick twice.”

“Wha-”

His eyes flew to his coat pocket his hand fumbling for the fanciful engraved wallet. When rich boy finally managed to pry it out, a puzzled look appeared on his face.

“I still have my -”

When he looked up, Selina had already disappeared into the crowd.

“...wallet.”

His eyes scanned the plaza, searching for that mysterious, brazen girl who had just tried stealing from, and had ended up kissing him right here in public - but he couldn’t find her anywhere. With a curious feeling, he opened his wallet - to find that all the bills had been taken out.

Bruce couldn’t help the amused smile growing on his face, as he pocketed the wallet Alfred had given him for his eighteenth birthday.

“Hmh. Bold indeed.”

To be continued... here.

[plinys]

timecanary for the ship mem!

Gives nose/forehead kisses

sara does it because shes a huge nerd and its definately while she’s a little tipsy and to tease rip and hes like ?? why are you like this ?? but hes also very soft and totally touched 

Gets jealous the most

sara insists that she doesnt get jealous and really if its anyones job to be getting jealous it should be rip. but hes so like, chill, when sara is off flirting with someone else that shes like ??? offended (tm). whereas rip gets flirted with and doesnt even realize it and sara insists that shes only jealous that SHE was not the person getting flirted with. but well,,, we all know the truth

Picks the other up from the bar when they’re too drunk to drive

theyre probably getting drunk together. but if not its rip being sad and doing drunk karoke and sara pretending shes offended he didnt invite her when she goes to pick him up. or sara out being a drunk mess with the legends and trying to get sober rip to pull the car over so they can have car sex

Takes care of on sick days

rip takes care of sara because she whines (though really gideon just fixes them both up)

Drags the other person out into the water on beach day

sara has to drag rip out to the beach in the first place. because he is delicate and british and will burn and really just isnt a fan of beach trips even if sara is standing there in a bikini just to tempt him

Gives unprompted massages

rip cause hes surprisingly soft sometimes and sara is like ??? what are you doing but also dont stop

Drives/rides shotgun

sara insists that she can drive and should be driving because she is the cool one, but rip would rather walk than let sara “disaster” lance drive so sara grumbles while sitting shot gun

Brings the other lunch at work

gideon has to remind them both to eat lets be real

Has the better parental relationship

i mean??? we were robbed of getting to see booster gold and ill never not be offended by this

Tries to start role-playing in bed

sara is a kinky shit

Embarrassingly drunk dancer

sara dances, rip does drunk karaoke canon has confirmed

Still cries watching Titanic

rip totally does, hes soft

Firmly believes in couples costumes

in one of my fics i had sara have them dress as the doctor and rose and it was really cute and so im 100% in the hc of sara insisting on couple costume

Breaks the expensive gift rule during Christmas

sara does but its like AN EXPENSIVE PRANK GIFT like she goes and buys rip 100 condoms and is like “were gonna use every single one of those” and rip is like, why did you make me open this in front of the whole team i want to die

Makes the other eat breakfast

i feel like rip could actually cook (i mean he does know how to make cakes) but again its gideon

Remembers anniversaries

rip does

Brings up having kids

its totally an accident when it happens. but like rip would never be willing to bring it up like after losing jonas and miranda like he doesnt think he deserves another chance at having a kid or a family and hes such a mess over the whole concept and like he loves sara so much and sometimes he thinks about it (dream about it), but he isnt sure he can put himself through that again. so when sara is like, hey surprise im pregnant, rip promptly panics and is a mess, but he’s also wand this for so long and so bad

[littlelovelymemes]

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[hawkscape]

Birds and Trees

Story I wrote starting Sillyandquiteawkward’s character Twinkson and my own Fallout oc Redtail. I ship weird things. Enjoy.

Red walked through the dead forest slowly. They had picked up a lot of edibles and they seemed to be getting more plentiful as they went deeper. The trees were all still dead but as they got deeper they could almost believe they weren't because of the amounts of moss and flowers growing on them. They also felt a bit uneasy as they walked deeper but their pencent for exploration and curiosity helped them fight against it. They were also kind of an idiot.

They also noticed it was getting darker. They weren't sure if it was just the trees or it was just getting later in the day. Didn't matter to them much as they turned on the light on their pip boy. They had never cared much for circadian rhythms anyway. They finally reached a clearing in the middle with a large tree in the center, the moon and stars shining above. It would have been a stunning sight anyway but what really struck them was the tree in the center of the clearing and how it seemed to be alive. They stepped forward and looked at the towering tree closer. It was a large thing with many knoty branches. As they got closer they actually realised the plant must be dead but it was covered in so much moss and flowers it seemed like it was alive. It looked like something out of a fairy tail. They stepped closer and whistled. They examined the tree closer and tried their best not to step on any of the flowers. This might be a good place to rest for awhile actually. Not sleep, it was to in the open, but rest was fine. They put their pack down and sat against the trunk shuffling through it to pull out a Fancy Lad snack cake. They had just shoved it into their mouth in one bite when a voice from above startled them.

“Hello little bird, what brings you to my tree?” The voice sounded like honey and they choked slightly while scrambling forward off the tree and turning around, ending up being propped up on their elbows. There was a man sitting in the crook of the tree, looking like a king on a throne. Flowers cascaded from his hair like a waterfall. Red quickly choked down the Fancy Lad and gasped for air. “Uh...hello. Nothing really. Just passin through. Didn't know this was your tree. Sorry for trespassing.”

The man smiled smoothly at them. “You are free to roam where you wish. Do you require anything?”

Red thought slightly while picking themselves up and dusting themselves off. The man seemed nice enough. “Uh, not that I can think of. Thank you though.” The man didn't frown but seemed to be less cheeky. Red noticed he was drooling slightly. “Do you need something? Ya look hungry.”

The drooling man tilted his head at the question. “I have a very particular taste.”

Red smiled bright and crooked. “Oh well, I got tons of stuff.”

The man's eyes uncomfortably burned into them as they got their pack back from the side of the tree, digging through it eagerly “I got lots of sweets. You got a sweet tooth? Also some meat. Lots of jerky. Tons of jerky. Wow just...entirely too much jerky. I don't even like jerky that much.” They stopped for a second and turned back to the man who seemed to be a little closer then he had been last time. “Oh I'm sorry. What's your name?”

The man blinked at them slowly. “You may call me Twinkson.”

Red smiled and nodded. “Nice ta meetcha. You can call me Redtail. Red for short.” Then they went back to diving through their pack as Twinkson watchd in amusment. It finally struck Red what was odd about this situation (well one of the many things). Twinkson seemed compleatly at ease. No armor, no guns. This guy must be really trusting. Or there must be something Red was missing. They didn't change their deminier but decided to be on the lookout. “So what are you feeling hungry for?”

Twinkson smiled languidly. “You’ll do.”

Red froze and looked the man up and down. “Well I mean...I'm flattered but-”

Twinkson sat up stighter from his lounging position, swinging their legs over the edge of his throne. “I don't take without giving though, there must be something you want.”

Red stuttered slightly. They couldn't pretend they weren't a very...prolific lover but someone being this blunt after first meeting them was a bit unusual. Did they want anything? I mean they'd be happy to just do it for free. This Twinkson didnt look half bad. Actually he looked very nice. Ethereal was the word that came to mind. But uh...he didn't exactly see a bed nearby and they were not very eager to get flowers in places they shouldn't be. “Well I mean...I’m flattered and normally I would be very...up for that but currently I will have to decline.” Twinkson didnt seem disuaded by this and simply leaned closer, smiling and showing what appeared to be a bottomless void of a mouth. Redtail blinked. “Unless you are being literal. Are you being literal?”

Twinksons eyes crinkled in amusement. “I mean what I say.”

Redtail looked between him and their bag. They were not sure if this was better or worse. Was he going to attack them? He wasn't making any moves. “W-well I think I might have some mystery meat in here somewhere. I’m pretty sure that's person meat. I mean, I think? I’ve never directly compared it.” They looked at their bag in an attempt to find the promised meat.

Twinkson tilted his head. “I prefer it fresh.”

Red laughed slightly. “Oh d-do you? I mean that's...reasonable.” They swallowed, but still noticed he wasn't making a move to attack them. What had he said? He would pay them? Well...they had stimpaks and this guy did seem hungry. He had been perfectly pleasant to them. They closed up their bag, turning back to Twinkson. Was he closer then he had been? “What uh-” They cleared their throat to go into bartering ™ mode. “What were you offering?”

Twinksons eyes sparkled at the prospect of their acceptance. “I know many things and can do many more. You give me blood and you will be repaid with something as valuable.”

Red wasn't sure what the going rate for a person's blood was. Due to their curse they seemed to be able to heal much better than they should be able to but still…

Wait.

Their curse.

They snapped their head up and Twinkson was pleased they had settled on something. Red pointed at themselves “I need you to kill me.”

Twinkson tilted his head. Not a particularly hard request but hardly one really worthy of his powers. Red was quick to amend. “I-I- mean not. Right now. I have...this condition.” Ah, Twinkson had smelled something off about them. “Whenever I die I always come back. In a different place, different time, but I’m always me. And I always remember eventually. I would rather it stop after this one. I’m just tired you know?” Twinkson did know but he didn't much care for reasons. He could make it happen.

He nodded. “Very well. Promise me your body after you die and you'll have your rest.”

Red looked relieved. “Sure, I won't be using it but…” He scrunched up his face. “You better not be lyin’ or about 18 to 25 years after I die I'll come find you again and…” They trailed off. “Be really mad about it.”

Twinkson almost laughed at their lackluster threat. “If I fail, you have full permission. But I don’t fail.” There was an edge in his voice.

Red nodded. “Good.” They were satisfied but then their their face fell. “But what about right now? You’re still hungry. You can...have some now if you want.”

Twinkson blinked tilted his head. “I will live.”

Red was unconvinced. “I can just give you some like...as a sample?”

Twinkson got an edge to his eyes. “I won't take charity.”

Red quickly shook their hands in an appeasing gesture. “Oh no, it’s a gift. It’s different.” Twinkson narrowed his eyes in displesure. “Uh, or you can give me something else.”

Twinkson raised an eyebrow. He didn't often get repeat customers. At least not so soon. “What would you wish?”

Red fumbled about, looking around them. “Flowers?”

Twinkson nodded. “Deal.”

Red woke up feeling slightly light headed in a bed of red flowers with the stars shining over them and with a voice whispering in their ear to not forget the deal they had struck. Strangely, the sickenly sweet scent of the flowers only filled them with calmness. They felt rested.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been a while since they had had the mysterious encounter with the flowery man but Red had no doubt it had really happened, so a few months later they returned to the dead forest and made their way back to the tree. The sun was hot overhead but the forest seemed to cool it as they came to the clearing once more. They almost suspected they wouldn’t be able to find it but eventually they came through the dead trees and found the large behemoth and the man they were looking for lounging lazily in its caress. The man cracked one eye open. “Hello little bird, come here to die?”

It was said so nonchalant but Red just tightened their grip on their pack. “No, no that's hopefully gonna still be a while. I just came by because I wanted to make sure everything was okay and if you...needed anything.”

Twinkson raised an eyebrow. He needed very few things.

Red continued. “I just like to, help you know? Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and since this place is on the way between two of the settlements I help I thought I'd pop in see if you were doing. Good see if you were eating well.” They tried to say it casually but their voice still caught.

Twinson blinked at their fumbled reasoning but he would never turn away a meal. “Is there something you needed?”

Red frowned, almost confused. “No I don't…I feel bad taking things for food. I get you want to be fair and everything but you need food to live so it just feels wrong.”

‘How presumptuous of you to think i need anything to live.’ Thought Twinkson. This self sacrificing cowboy certainly was a character. A semi-annoying very talkative character. “I don't take without giving. Fair is fair.”

Red didnt like it but they could understand it. “Fine you can just give me some more flowers. I felt bad about killing the last ones so I didn't pick any. could you maybe give me some...already dead? Maybe dried or in a bouquet or something?”

Twinkson wondered what facination this bird had with his flowers but he nodded. “Very well. Enjoy.”

Red again woke up but this time found that flowers had been woven through the various straps and buckles in their clothes, including around their head. They also realise they were not alone this time. Twinkson still lazed in the tree above them though it was now much later in the day. Red got up shakily and tilted his hat at them. “Thank ya kindly, they’re very nice.” Red turned to leave before hesitating. “How do ya do that?”

Twinkson took a sip from a shiny cup he was holding. “Trade secret.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many of their friends noticed it but no one said anything. How, about once month Red would head off on their own and came back smelling like flowers and slightly out of it. Red seemed happy after these excursions so what did it matter?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Red limped into the clearing and flopped down on the flower bed with a sigh. A smooth voice floated over them. “Come to die?”

They were used to this by now. “Naw, should be fine. Just needed a place to rest. Sorry for intruding.”

Twinkson continued to lounge easily dispite (or perhaps because of) the nice smell of blood in the air. “You are free to come and go as you please.”

Red smiled toothily. “Thank yah.”

Twinkson looked them up and down. “I could heal that for you.”

Red laughed before signing sadly. “Sorry, I don't think I can take much more blood loss. I'll be outta your hair in a second.” They squinted up at Twinkson through their glasses. “How do you keep your hair that nice? Looks very...soft.”

Twinkson fiddled with it. “Sunflower oil.”

Red stared at the sky. “Ah...I miss sunflowers.” They looked Twinkson up and down again. “You kind of remind me of one. Always lounging in the sun. Always giving. Sunny disposition.”

Twinkson haden’t been talking to like this in quite a while and wasn't sure what to make of it. “Thank you.”

Red simply nodded and closed their eyes to rest a while. Twinkson fiddled with his hair some more. What a strange bird they were. He figured kind words were payment enough for a restful sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Why do you continue to come to me and ask for things that mean nothing to you?” Twinkson didn't care for the reasons behind the gifts he gave but he could see that Red gave no thought to the flowers he gave them. They appreciated them but he could tell it was simply to make Twinkson feel better and he would not be pitied as such. He could stand it at first but this was one time to long.

Red shook their head. “They don't mean nothing. I love the flowers! And people are always so happy when I hand them some or plant some in the settlements. It really brightens up the wasteland.” They smiled brightly and Twinkson was begining to get annoyed at their self sacrifice. This bird who asked to die and then for flowers in the meantime.

“Flowers can be found anywhere. Why keep coming to me? If you don't need my services then leave.” They would have normally never turned down a meal but the smell of pity was souring his stomach.

Red looked hurt. “N-no I just- I just wanted to make sure you got fed.”

Twinkson got a dangerous look. “I am not a pet dog.”

Red tried to placate. “I know your not I just- like to help people. I makes me happy and if me giving you food makes you happy then that makes me happy. And the flowers make other people happy. It's a big circle of happy.”

Twinkson could understand  theoreticly but this but it still felt off. “You are not my only customer. People more desperate and more grateful come seeking me as well.”

Red shrugged. “Well I figured I just...there are bound to be thin times. I'm just like...a holdover snack, I guess.” Red almost hated how casual about this they had become.

Twinksons face relaxed as he realised he wouldn’t be able to dissuade the cowboy easily. He could have ordered them away and he knew they wouldn't come back but for some reason he didn't want to do that. Yet. “Ask for something other then flowers.”

Red bit their lip trying to think of something. “Some fruit?”

Twinkson raised an eyebrow. “Are you simply going to give this fruit to the settlers?”

Red looked to the side and then back at him. “Yes?”

Twinkson narrowed his eyes. “Pick something else.”

Red blew out a huff and scratched the back of their neck. “Geez. Uh...you say you know lots of things to?” Twinkson nodded. “Oh okay tell me, how do they get the cream inside a fancy lad? Do they bake it in there or do they maybe dip the cream in a vat of batter or-

Red woke up mid sentence covered in apples. They took a bite of one absentmindedly. They almost recalled a story about knowledge and snakes and apples but most of their mind was preoccupied with the secret they would take to their grave. ‘Wow...was that really how they did it? Wild.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Could I braid your hair?”

“Is that a payment or a request?”

Red shrugged. “It could be both. I know it's not food but I took a big hit recently and prolly need to stock up on a little more blood first.”

Twinkson observed them before scooting over on his tree and indicating for them to climb up. Red quickly scrambled up trying not to step on any flowers. The tree wasn’t that tall but even so Red was thankful the vines seemed to be places in the perfect hand hold positions. They finally hefted themselfs up and turned to Twinkson. They didn't think they had been this close to them since their first meeting. They almost blushed remembering it but was focused on the task at hand. “Okay, turn around.” Twinkson did and Red bit off their gloves only hesitating slightly before starting to card their fingers through the hair. Not a knot to be found. Red started talking to fill the silence. “So...are you human?” Twinkson tilted his head and didn't respond. “It’s okay if you don't wanna say but I'll tell you about myself to pay for it. We just don't normally interact much while I'm awake ya know?” He laughed a little as they started to separate the hair in strands. “My first life I had to find this thing called a water chip-“

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They staggered into the clearing while the rain was pouring. Twinkson was under a canopy of moss and watched them as they entered and collapsed defeated against the trunk, seeming to not notice the moisture or the rads it provided. Twinkson didn’t speak but finally there was a large wet sob from beneath them. “Can you bring people back from the dead Iwinkson?”

Twinkson blinked evemly. “I could, but it would cost more then you have.”

Red laughed wetly. “I figured.” They stayed in silence for a while longer and that was what really struck Twinkson. “I was to late. I tried. If I hadn’t…” They kept speaking in half sentences to the flowers around them, getting increasingly soaked.

Twinkson almost felt pity. Almost. “What can I do for you Red?”

Red took note of their actual name and would have been overjoyed if not wracked with guilt and pain. “Make it go away.”

Twinkson would have normally asked for more spacific instructions but instead simply leaned back in his seat. Red looked up at them. Twinkson motioned for them to climb up. They did so shakily and wraped themselfs in Twinksons arms crying unrestrained and out of the rain. He pet Reds scraggly hair until they had calmed and the blood had been taken, causing them to pass out. He looked at the cup that had filled to their left. What was peace of mind worth?

Red woke to the warm sunshine and found they were on top of the tree instead of beneath it smelling like sunflower oil. What had they asked Twinkson for this time? Normally they could remember but it was a little foggy this time. They tried to dig but could only seem to remember a empty plot of land to the east. ‘Hm..that would be a good place for a settlement. Why haven't I built one there before?’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Red whistled as they walking into the forest at dusk. They held the package carefully on their arms as they trod the well worn but still very overgrown path to the center of the forest. The forest seemed to be expanding its hold. That made Red smile as they finally breached the inner clearing. “Good evening Twinkson!” They spoke clearly and happily.

The drooling man swung his leg lazily off the side of the tree. “Good evening little bird. What brings you?”

Red stepped forward dramatically. “I come bearing gifts. It’s a special occasion you know. Twent-...thirt-....many years ago today is when I met you for the first time. And I think we should celebrate.”

Twinkson observed them in amusment as they moved to sit against his tree and unpacked the package. It seemed to be some sort of cake. He tilted his head. “An amusing sentiment, but I will have to decline.”

Red looked up at them innocently and shook their head. “Oh,the cakes not for you, that's for me.” They took out a fork and started eating. “I got something better for you.”

Twinkson knew what they meant but asked anyway. “What could you get me?”

Red smiled, face full of cake. “Me!”

Twinkson would have thought they just ment another blood offering but he was quicker than that. He knew what they really meant. Their slightly greying hair and slowed form belied this, though they were still as exuberant a ever. He knew it was coming and he almost felt sad about it. Almost. He wouldn’t deny it would be slightly less interesting with them gone. He never much needed or wanted the company of others but the strange bird didn't vex them as much as anyone would suspect. He looked down at them eating the cake like it was the last thing they ever would eat, because it was, and were reminded of there first meeting all those years ago. Twinkson didnt much care for time or its measurements but he did notice the effects on those coming into his domain. Mostly on his bird though, because they came into it most often. Red finished their food and stood up using the tree as help, knees cracking. They then turned to face Twinkson and stepped back with their arms open. “So, sunflower, ask me the million dollar question. I’m ready.”

Twinkson sat up with a glint in his eye and a smile on his lips. “Have you come here to die?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you are dire need and willing to give up something precious then wander until you find a dead forest. At its center will be a man with flowering hair and honey words who will grant you what you wish for a price. He will never fail and only rescind if the terms are not upheld. He is fair and lawful.

But beware what is wished for in the presence of the man's companion, a lounging figure covered in red sunflowers as the base of the tree, sitting as an unmoving sentinel. No one mortal has seen them move but they listen to pleas all the same and people swear that if you are kind and good and have purity in your heart you may find your problems gone and replaced with petals.

The sentinel is more choosy but their price is not as steep if one is true. The king has no qualms but you will pay in blood.

Yes, Twinkson never failed but his sentinal was proof that he is open to negotiation and very

very

persuasive.

Hope you enjoyed! This wasn’t a commission but I do take writing commissions here and here!