#like my sister vented to me the other day (and of course I was actually in a good mood at the start of the call)

[rosicheeks]

Honeybee: Name something positive you have done for yourself or someone else in the last two weeks.

I’ve been really trying to focus on bettering myself lately.

[rue-dixon]

Bro-in-law Dandan propaganda

Dandan playing both sides for his sister and Chilchuck.

Chilwife venting about Chilchuck to her brother. "He just never listens! He's so stubborn I'm tired of him!" while Dandan's just nodding and agreeing like "mhm yeah he just doesn't understand what you're doing through when he's gone at all."

Turn around now to Chilchuck, venting to his brother in law aka his closest childhood friend about the same argument. "She just doesn't even try understand how hard it is for me too." And Dandan is once again nodding his head agreeing, "of course not, she doesn't understand just how hard those jobs actually are."

Uncle Dandan, but the girls call him Uncle Dan/Danny. Who's also closest with Puckpatti. Meijack's a daddy's girl, Flertom a mamas girls, and Puckpatti's an uncles girl.

Chilwife bugging Dandan about not being married yet. And tires to get Chilchuck to agree with her and talk to him about it too. But Chilchuck is just like "let the kid do what he wants, he'll find someone eventually."

When he first saw his sister and Meijack after she just gave birth (him being a child) he said Meijack looked like a "wrinkly potato".

Dandan became a dungeon adventurer because of Chilchuck, who tired really really hard to talk him out of it. But Dandan said he didn't plan on going very deep and wanted to stick with treasure hunters instead of hardcore explorers so Chilchuck laid off finally.

"Chilchuck's like the older brother I never had!"

"I'd say Dandan is the little brother I never had, but I have two of them and they're both little shits just like him."

Dandan would always ask how his sisters and nieces were doing when him and Chilchuck would be working at the guild together. But always obviously had more interest in Puckpatti.

"How's my sister?

"She's fine"

"... and Puck?"

"She's fine too, as well as my OTHER girls."

"Right right.. I was just gonna ask about them next!"

Chilchuck and Dandan worked together to form the guild. Dandan taking care of things when Chilchuck was away or on very long jobs.

Chilchuck and Dandan poked at each other a lot as children. But became good friends as adults. Especially when Dandan was old enough to start drinking, Chilchuck was happy to have a new dedicated drinking buddy. They even stayed close after his wife left him, "she left me, not him." Little does Chilchuck know, she actually told her brother she was leaving and why she left. But he never told Chilchuck because she asked him not to.

Dandan making fun of his sister's situation, especially when he was younger. Even if he actually didn't care about them having shotgun wedding, he just thought it was funny.

"This wouldn't have happened if you just kept your legs closed."

"Only I get to call my sister a whore because it's funny. Anyone else who tries dies."

Uncle Dandan telling the girls crazy stories about their parents when they were younger. Stories that the two of them never wanted their kids to know.

Dandan: what's that?

Chilchuck: huh? Oh those are the brothels for adventurers.

Dandan: oh... you never used it did you?

Chilchuck: what? No! Why would you think I'd cheat on my wife?!

Dandan: just making sure...

Since Chilchuck wants to hide his family from work. He has to tell Dandan not to tell anyone that they're in laws. That they're just friends and that's it. And he'd prefer if he didn't bring up his sister or nieces in conversations. Dandan thought he was weird and got a little suspicious. But Chilchuck explained his reasoning and Dandan agreed, it didn't affect him much anyways.

Dandan: so, what are you and my sister fighting about now?

Chilchuck: what? Where did you get that idea from??

Dandan: you've been sleeping in the union quarters for three days straight. So what's she mad at you for this time?

Chilchuck: ...

He's a built in babysitter even if he kinda hates it. But he loves his nieces so it's ok.

When they were estranged he fully believed they'd get back together and wasn't worried about them getting an official divorce at all. And just waved it off every time he was asked about it.

"You kidding? They couldn't keep their hands off each other when we were kids. Practically inseparable. I'm sure they'll talk, realize how much they miss each other, have makeup sex and then go on like none of this ever happened."

Anyways why'd they make him so cute in the anime tf

[petrichor-idyllic]

Hey! I wanted to request a fic with minho maybe where the reader (she/her) is shy? And a mom friend too maybe like feeding everybody 24/7 and caring all sort of stuff with her like band aids and napkins.

(Sorry for any mistakes english is not my first language)

I think I can just about manage this.

This is kind of short because I really could just not think of a decent plot for the life of me.

Writer's block is a killer man.

SOFT AT HEART

MASTERLIST | MINHO MASTERLIST

SUMMERY: See above. Takes place before the arrival of Thomas.

You've been harbouring a long-term crush on Minho, but the problem is you're shy and nervous, and Minho is anything but. Of course, Minho isn't the only Glader you care about, but it's hard to bond with a group of rowdy boys sometimes. So, you show your affections by taking care of them instead. Unbeknownst to you, your subtle acts of kindness give Minho the drive he's been missing for a long time- and maybe he needs a bit more than what he's getting.

WARNINGS: None, really.

You're the odd one out in the Glade. Of course, there's the blinding obvious that you're the only girl amongst, but also you're more reserved than your counterparts.

You've always felt like there's a strange barrier between you and the other Gladers- maybe it's because of your gender, maybe it's because of your personality. But it doesn't matter; something about you just doesn't quite click.

It's not that you don't like the boys. You love them, in fact- they're normally kind and understanding with you even though they aren't with each other. They have a lot of respect for you.

And the feeling is mutual.

But, you can't exactly go around telling a bunch of teenage boys how much you care about them without them getting the wrong idea. Not that you're great with your words to begin with. So, you show your affections through acts of service.

You offer food and water to tired Gladers who are too busy to stop working to have lunch- mainly Buliders, Track-hoes and Slicers. You carry bandages and band-aids for slight injuries that happen to those around you, and you always offer an understanding ear when the boys want to vent their frustrations, even if you don't always know what to say.

Maybe your subtle acts of kindness would just be a typical friendly gesture if it weren't for the fact that you have a massive crush on Minho.

You swore to yourself when you first came up in the Box that you wouldn't get romantically involved with any of the boys. And you've made that painfully clear to everyone. They're your friends, and they all see you as the big sister role you've put yourself in- but Minho?

Minho.

A flaw in your plan, to say to the least.

It's not like you guys talk all the time or spend loads of time together, but you have got into the habit of getting up early and meeting the Runners at the Doors to give them their lunch and drinks for the day.

You only do this so they can have more time in the Map Room before they leave for the day, which is some much needed precious seconds. You started doing this after you overheard Minho complaining about feeling like there's not enough time in the day. So, when you started showing up first thing in the morning, waking up earlier than most of the Glade, he definitely took a shine to you.

It's a simple gesture, really. One that doesn't seem to faze the other Runners in the slightest, but Minho always seems more determined and happier after seeing you. Even the Runners have pointed out a shift in work ethic to Ably.

Though, with you starting to cooperate with talking to Minho and having actual conversations, the way he looks at you is starting to make you melt.

You don't really know what it is about Minho. He's sarcastic and kind of mean sometimes, and he's definitely not scared of speaking his mind or acting recklessly. He's one of the highest regarded Gladers around, for obvious reasons, but he's probably also one of the most feared and powerful.

You've actually witnessed Minho tell Alby what to do.

What a day that was.

But that might be why you started liking him- because he isn't like that with you. Sure, you'll get the occasional witty comment or eye roll, but for the most part, he's kinder with you. It's kind of common knowledge that you're the Glade's soft spot, but that's more applicable to Minho than anyone else.

"Dude, you're staring again," Ben leans against a tree at the edge of the Deadheads where him and Minho occasionally spend free time away from the other members of the Glade.

"Hm?" Minho hums, sitting on the ground, not really paying attention to anything Ben has to say. That's nothing new.

"You're staring- again," Ben scoffs, crouching down next to him, "yanno you can talk her without her feeding us at the Doors?"

Minho glares at his friend. "I'm not staring."

Minho is a liar. You've plagued him for a while, even before you started providing for them. Of course, this is the expectation with being the only girl, but Minho has changed- like said before.

"You totally are, shuck-face."

"Slim it, Ben- you don't know what you're talking about."

"You're soft on her, man; everyone can see it."

"Everyone's soft on her, shuck-face. That's why she's made it clear she's not gonna date or any of that klunk with us."

"I mean..." Ben drags out the word, "you never know, right?"

"Dude, what are you getting at here?"

Ben shrugs. "I don't know, man, I'm just... picking up a vibe." Minho squints at his friend, bewildered that Ben thinks that's any kind of explanation.

"The shuck are you talking about?"

Ben sighs. "You've just been better, dude. It's nice having you back to normal."

Minho didn't need to ask. He knows what Ben's talking about. Before you showed up, Minho was rapidly losing hope. Having fully mapped the whole Maze and still without an exit, or even so much of a sign of an exit, it's kind of hard to keep hopes up.

But when you came up and started going around trying to raise everyone's spirits, despite being slightly awkward; he started to pick up speed again. The Glade became more positive, and Minho started to gain feelings for you.

Despite what you'd made clear.

"I think you're looking too much into it," Minho huffs, sitting back properly, leaning fully against the tree.

"I don't-"

"Hey!" You attempt to shout over to the boys, realising they're yet to come to dinner after the long day. You're holding two bowls of stew as you walk over. "You guys okay?" You ask, passing the food to the boys in turn.

Minho takes the dish from you. "Playing Glade mother as per usual?"

You avoid his gaze. "Yeah, well, you guys haven't eaten yet and Frypan is impatient- can't have our best Runners going hungry, can we?"

"Ah, so you think I'm the best?" Ben's tone is a kind of fake flirty, probably to gauge Minho's reaction. You just blink at him.

"I-I mean, I don't really know much about running, but I'm pretty sure Minho is the Keeper for a reason- so, uh, sorry?" Your words don't quite make sense, not wanting to insult Ben, but making your opinion known.

Minho can't help but smirk at this as Ben fake pouts. His eyes land on you, flickering up and down for a second, almost unintentionally; which makes your face feel warm.

"Anyway," you clear your throat, "I'm gonna..." You throw your thumb over your shoulder, "yanno."

"Yeah, catch you later." You give an awkward wave to Minho before you turn and walk slightly faster than normal away.

"You're whipped, bro," Ben chuckles between eating spoonfuls of stew, resulting in getting punched in the leg.

"Shut up, man."

Minho thought about this for a while- longer than he'd care to admit. He does like you, and you seem to be more friendly and talkative with him than you do the other Gladers.

Maybe he should just bite the bullet.

Maybe just asking you on a date wouldn't be that bad of an idea. I mean, the worst you can say is no, right? And you're a nice girl, of course, you'd be gentle about it.

Unless, you're not and you reject him and humiliate him.

Okay, so Minho might have a fear of rejection that he didn't know he had. It's not worth the awkwardness.

It's not until the next Bonfire night that Minho reconsiders this. You've taken a shine to the new Greenie.

And by "taken a shine", I mean the poor boy is rocking back and forth, curled into a ball and you're desperately trying to comfort him. He does seem to have relaxed a bit, but the Maze is a lot to take in.

He's been given Gally's Special Brew, and the alcohol has definitely calmed his nerves. So, you take a break, retreating to a more secluded area- still within shouting distance if you're needed, but far enough away to take a breather. You lean back against a log, letting your head test on the wood.

"Here," your eyes flicker open, seeing Minho standing over you, a drink in his hand.

He'd been watching you for a while, and seeing how dedicated and caring you've been literally all day has shown him he needs to make some kind of move.

"Thanks," you sit up straight, taking the drink off of him as he takes the spot next to you, both of you facing away from the festivities. "You not joining in?"

"Nah," he scoffs, taking a sip of his own drink.

"I guess you never really do, huh?" He smiles at you; he always feels warm inside when you show him that you pay attention to him. You pay attention to everyone, but sometimes it feels like you pay extra attention to him.

Probably because you do, but he doesn't know that.

"You know me so well," he scoffs and you roll your eyes before he playfully shoves you- something you wouldn't have the courage to do.

"'Course- I always pay attention to people I like," a smirk appears across Minho's face as he slightly raises his eyebrow. It takes you a second, but you quickly realise what that sounded like.

Your face immediately starts to burn and you look away. "I didn't mean-"

"Uh huh."

"I didn't!"

"Why do you look so embarrassed then?"

"Shut up," you grumble, hands coming to your face as Minho laughs at you. You've never been good at the flirting thing, and it's not hard to fluster you, but since you actually like Minho, it's drastically worse. "I didn't mean it like that- I just- you're my friend and I-I respect you- and-"

"Do you wanna go on a date?"

You freeze, turning to face him as you blink.

"What?"

Minho stares straight ahead, mainly so he doesn't freak out. "I just figured I'd stop thinking about asking and just actually ask you." You open your mouth to speak but he doesn't give you the chance. "I know you've got this whole dating rule, and you don't want any of that klunk- but I like you, (Y/N). And I used to think that if a girl came up here, I wouldn't care 'cause I've got the Maze to deal with. But, I can't help it- you're just... Good. Everyone here likes you and you're just a good person."

He looks at you, second guessing himself when he sees your completely blank expression.

"I-I don't mean- shuck it," he laughs. "You can say no and I won't be upset; I get it. But I just thought I'd ask. It's just one date, if you want, and then we don't have to do anything else or be anything and forget it even happened if you regret it. I don't wanna make you uncomfortable."

"What would we do?" The question is out of a genuine curiosity than anything. It's not like there are many restaurants or movie theatres in the Glade.

Now it's Minho's turn to blankly blink. "Well, we uh, we could go for a swim in the lake, or I could rob Frypan and we could have a picnic in the Deadheads, or we could just chill somewhere and talk about dumb klunk- whatever you wanna do."

"You've thought about this, huh?" You smile, warmth fluttering through your body as Minho turns a shade of pink, scratching the back of his neck.

"I mean... just a little." You've never seen him be embarrassed before.

It's kind of cute.

"Okay," you say after a second.

"Okay?"

"Okay, I'll go on a date with you; that picnic sounds good."

He grins. "Yeah?"

"Yeah... I kinda like you too, so..."

Minho can't stop smiling, even when you avoid looking at him again.

"You like me too?" You glance at him. He looks perfect, his lopsided smile, his dark hair and face illuminated by the flames behind him.

"Yeah," you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding, "I like you too. A lot, actually."

"Cool," he clears his throat, "cool, that's cool."

"(Y/N)!" Newt calls you, "the Greenie's freakin' out again! Give us a shuckin' hand!"

You roll your eyes, standing up and smiling at Minho once again. "So, it's a date then?"

"Yeah, it's a date- I'll figure out that picnic and let you know."

"Sounds like a plan," you say as you step over the log, trying to hide your smile and not squeal the entire Glade down as you go back to your daily role.

Minho watches you walk away, letting his head drop back when your out of sight. He's completely buzzing and feels on top of the world.

"So," Ben approaches, chuckling at his friend's love-drunk state, "you finally asked her then?"

"Shut your shuckin' mouth."

Yo, here's another Minho piece, though I am struggling with all the Minho work atm. He's one of my favourite all time characters but I'm running out of new ways to do the same thing, if that makes sense? So sorry if this one isn't as good- my quality is going down hill lmao.

I still hope you kind of like, regardless :))

[sarahsmi13s]

Two Ladders

pairing: jake ‘hangman’ seresin x sarah grant (fem!oc)

characters: sarah grant, jake seresin

warnings: language, pregnancy, pregnancy hormones, crying, loss of appetite, hiding feelings from significant others, light mentions of jake's PTSD, mentions of throwing up, all from jake's p.o.v, family issues, if i missed any let me know

word count: ~2.2k

a/n: this story is inspired by ‘His Little Girl’ (bradley bradshaw x reader) by the lovely @roosterscockpit​​  ( @milesdickpic​ ) also, yes, the oc is based on me lol (well a fantasy version lol) this is heavily inspired by my own feelings towards my actual brother and sister not getting along very well and the worries sarah has here are worries i've actually had when it concerns this topic

this is a backstory piece! you can find the other parts to j and s -> here

summary: jake notices a change in his fiance's behavior. at first he thinks it's caused by the pregnancy and sarah's hormones being out of wack. but when he comes home to find her crying on their bed does he finally voice his concerns and lets her vent to him.

When Jake first noticed something was wrong with Sarah, he thought it was just her pregnancy hormones making her a little emotional. He’d catch her crying or appearing a little out of focus, but she was an emotionally sensitive person, so he attributed it all to that and her hormones. 

Of course, he still held her when he found her crying, he’s her comforter, and he took that job very seriously. He knew her tears could be nothing, a result of simply reading something or seeing a video. Maybe she just needed his shoulder to cry on, and he was happy to provide it. If she wanted to talk about it, he was there to listen, and if she just wanted to curl in his lap, that was fine too.

If it was something really really bothering her, he hoped she knew she could come to him about it. 

He noticed that her appetite seemed to be shot too. She usually jumped at the chance to have him make one of his mother’s enchilada recipes, but she just shook her head and said a burger would be enough and then she only ate half.

But again, Jake blamed that on the pregnancy too. Sarah had morning sickness and was sick throughout the day, especially if something disagreed with her. So he thought that she was just trying not to irritate her stomach and never commented on it.

But he made note of it all. 

Jake was making sure not a thing went unnoticed. Because nothing can turn out to be something…

Jake sighed as he got in his truck, inhaling the perfume he sprayed on the back of his hand. Storms were rolling in, and he could feel the anxiety peaking in his chest, but the familiar all encompassing smell of his fiancèe helped keep him calm as he prepared himself to go home.

Before he started out of the parking lot, he pulled his phone out and sent Sarah a text. She was working right now, but she would text him back since it was her free hour, so she wasn’t doing much other than planning or putting grades in. 

After sending the text, he pulled up his playlist and started it before putting his phone face down and leaving the parking lot to go straight home.

When Jake parked in their driveway, he noticed Sarah’s vehicle also in the driveway. 

Tilting his head, Jake checked his phone. Had she called him earlier in the day to let him know that she was going to be home and he just didn’t realize? No.... and she hadn’t responded to his text from earlier either. 

Jake took a deep breath and got out of his truck, grabbed his things and went inside.

He was trying to rationalize it in his head, telling himself that she was okay and that the babies were okay. He needed to tell himself that, or he would spiral with the storm brewing above him.

Maybe the morning sickness was too much, and she didn’t want to stay at the school and “power through it” like she normally tried to. She came home to rest and was actually asleep when he sent that message, and she’s still asleep.

But she was okay, everything was okay.

Jake took a deep breath and went to the kitchen to get two bottles of water before going upstairs to the bedroom.

When he opened the door, he found Sarah on her side of the bed with her back to the door and curled up with a half-drunk bottle of water on her nightstand. At first, it appeared to be like she was just sleeping, so Jake decided to quietly just change into his sweatpants and get in bed next to her and try to sleep as well.

He wasn’t about to wake her up just because he wanted to be held. Sarah needed her rest, and just being next to her would help ease the anxiety the storm was riling up in him.

But as he slipped his shirt off, tossing it on the pile of khakis that he made a note of to fold later, he thought he heard a sniffle come from the bed.

He furrowed his brow but just slipped the black sweats on before turning to join her on the bed.

As he stepped towards the bed, he watched her subtly try to wipe her face as she sniffled. But when she cut off her own sob with her hand and buried her face in her pillow, his heart dropped.

He immediately rounded the bed to her side and knelt down, “Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” Sarah kept her head down, buried in the pillow, muffling her cries as Jake watched her chest jerk with sobs. He frowned and reached up to gently push her hair out of her face, “Sugar… please, talk to me, what’s going on?” 

Sarah unburied half of her face, and Jake’s thumb is quick to wipe the tears slipping down her cheek, “What are you doing home?” He frowned a little at her attempt to change the subject, but he sighed softly and answered her. “Storm grounded us, got to come home early.”

Her head quickly turned to him, her red-rimmed eyes wide.

“Oh my goodness, Jake. I’m so sorry, I forgot about that,” she said, sitting up and wiping her eyes. “Are-are you okay?” 

Jake felt his heart break just a little that she was worried more about him than she was about the fact he just caught her crying.

“I’m fine, Sugar. Better now that I’m home.” He reached up and cupped her cheek, “But you’re not fine, what’s going on?”

“It’s nothing, Darlin, just-” 

In the middle of her sentence, Sarah’s phone lit up with a notification, and her breath hitched.

Jake eyed her and then looked at her phone seeing that it was an email from one of her players about the practice schedule for the day. Another email dinged right after with her assistant coach's reply.

He placed it face down and looked up at her. “Did something happen at school? Is something going on between teachers that is making you so upset?”

Sarah’s mouth dropped a little, “Wh-what?” 

“Sarah… you have been crying nearly everyday. And-and your appetite is completely shot,” he said gently as moved to sit on the bed. “That’s just pregnancy hormones and not wanting to upset my stomach too much…”

Jake nodded before taking her hands in his, his thumb immediately playing with the ring on her finger, “That’s what I thought it was at first. But the fact a notification from your phone made you tense up is telling me that something else is going on. Please, tell me what it is.”

Sarah sniffled, taking in a shaky breath as she tried to collect her thoughts.

“It’s not school related… It’s um… it’s Shawn and Selena,” she said quietly as her voice began to clog with emotion. “S-something happened, and now they’re not talking. And I just… I don’t fucking know Jake…” 

Jake immediately wrapped her in a hug, not caring that she was sobbing directly into his ear.

“Shhh shhh, it’s okay, it’s okay.” 

He held her until she calmed down, rocking her gently as her tears dripped down his back.

She pulled back first to wipe her eyes, and Jake took the chance to move to the middle of the bed and pull her into his side.

“Talk to me, let it out, honey,” he urged gently.

Sarah took a deep breath before spilling it all to him. Everything weighing on her heart about the whole situation.

And Jake listened, he didn’t interject unless he had a question, and even then, he felt like he needed to wait to say something at all.

“I just – I feel like I’m on two ladders with all of this… One ladder is Shawn, and the other is Selena, and I’m doing the damn splits. I either need to pick a ladder or get off and leave both. But I can’t, Jake… I can not pick, I will not pick.” 

She harshly wiped at her eyes, “I just I fucking can’t, Jake… But either way, pick or not pick, I’m gonna hurt someone’s feelings.”

“Are they asking you to pick sides?” 

“N-no… I don’t know what happened, I know bits and pieces like I told you… but it’s clear feelings have been hurt, and I feel like it’s gonna come down to me having to pick, and I can’t fucking do that…” 

She pulled back from Jake, “And I’m terrified to like or share anything on Facebook from either of them in case it hurts someone’s feelings. I shouldn’t be fucking scared about that, but I am!”

“And,” she continued as more tears gathered on her lash line. “When they weren’t on speaking terms before, they wouldn’t be seen at the same fucking function together. If one was there, the other wasn’t. If one had no idea the other was gonna show up, they would stay until after dinner and then fucking leave.”

Jake felt his heart break as he gently rubbed her back. This was affecting her deeply. It would have affected her like this before the pregnancy, but it was tenfold with the heightened emotions.

“And… fuck, I feel so selfish for feeling like this…” She wiped her eyes again, “I’m afraid that if they aren’t on speaking terms by October, they’re not gonna be at the wedding.”

“Why do you feel selfish for feeling like that?” 

“Because Jake, I’m worrying about my own feelings over theirs!” Sarah rubbed her face, frustrated, “I’m worried about how this affects me, this isn’t about me! But just – fuck I feel like such a shitty person…”

Jake’s jaw dropped, “Hey, hey, hold on now.” He pulled her hands away from her face, “You are not a shitty person for having your own feelings about a situation. There is nothing wrong with that. You are not selfish for worrying about whether or not your brother and sister will be at your wedding. You’re not, Sugar.” 

He squeezed her hands, “Why didn’t you come to me with this? You know I would have your back…” Sarah sniffled and looked away, “I didn’t want to bother you… I wanted to try and do this all on my own…” 

“But you don’t have to… You deserve to know that you have someone to catch you if you fall off those two ladders. That you’ll have someone to go to if you choose to walk away.” He gently turned her head to look at him as he wiped her tears, “Do you want advice, or do you just want me to hold you?” 

She leaned into his hand, “I could really use your advice… I’m so stuck, and I’m so scared…”

Jake nodded, giving her a gentle smile, “I think that what needs to happen is that you just need to step back from them both. Just be honest with them and tell them that you can’t handle this right now. You are allowed to do that. The stress and anxiety is not good for you or the twins. It is affecting you a lot, Sarah… This whole thing is affecting you, you are literally making yourself sick over it.”

Sarah opened her mouth, but he stopped her.

“Your appetite is almost gone, you eat because you know you have to. I don’t think it’s just the food that irritates your stomach anymore. Yes, you’re pregnant, and you’re gonna be throwing up. But your mental well-being affects your physical well-being, and all of the stress and anxiety is making you sick.”

He pushed some hair behind her ear, “If you want to take a few days before saying anything, that’s fine. But I really think you should consider it. I know they’re family, and you love them both, but you have to think of how this is affecting you. Do not hurt yourself in order to please them, that’s not fair to you.”

She pulled back a little to wipe her eyes before looking at her lap. “I just don’t want them to think I’m mad at them… because I’m not mad at them.” Jake nodded and tilted her head up, “I understand that, and I know that you care about everyone so deeply… but you have to put that care into yourself, too.” 

She nodded, and he pulled her into a hug, “I love you so much, Sugar. I’ve got your back.” “Thank you, Jake. I love you too.” He smiled and kissed the side of her head before she pulled back and kissed his lips.

Jake chuckled, “Now, I can put on a movie, or we can watch MrBallen and cuddle before I go make dinner. Does that sound okay?” “Ooooh, we need to catch up on MrBallen, let’s do that,” Sarah responded, grinning as she turned to get the remote. “And yes, I had a small lunch before I came home, and I have some spare saltines in the drawer. I’ve eaten today.” 

He kissed her head, “Good girl.�� She scoffed playfully and layed down next to him, turning on the TV.

After a few minutes, Jake spoke up, “You know, we could also say that your doctor told you to watch your blood pressure–” “Jake, focus on the strange, dark, and mysterious. We can work on it later, okay? I need the distraction.” 

He chuckled and nodded, “Yes, ma’am.”

i know this is kind of a random, unprompted J and S piece, but my muse was playing off my deep internal feelings and brought this piece to fruition

never the less, i hope you enjoyed

and i will be getting to the twins arrival and the wedding as soon as i can! i'm just working on other series as well, thank you for being so patient with me! 💜

j and s tags <333: @milesdickpic @roosterscockpit @luckyladycreator2 @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @sebsxphia @mamachasesmayhem @nobody7102 @djs8891 @kmc1989 @marbledaesthetics @fangirlbang @penguin876 @hisredheadedgoddess28 @bellaireland1981 @memeorydotcom @matisse556 @harryigprompt @sky2nd @scarlettwidow19 @showthemwhoyouare-6 @coffeewithcal @whatislovevavy

[blackwolfstabs]

NEVER BE ALONE

"I don't want you to go..."

fandom: Scream characters: Sam & Tara Carpenter a/n: random vent fic. it's that week for me. for my Tara.

It was common—no, predictable—for the Carpenter sisters to be clingy with each other, but Sam… Everyone knew it. She was clingy, overprotective, possessive, a helicopter-older-sister, even jealous, you might say, under the right circumstances. She had gotten better, ever since Tara had started going to therapy, talking a lot more about anything and everything, and going back to the way they were when they were younger. But Sam still had her moments.

One was tonight.

Tara was going to a formal dance at Blackmore University with Chad and Mindy, and afterwards they were going to stay at some sort of vacation home overnight to savor the celebration. It wasn’t anything risky like the Kappa Beta Omega party, but it was a party where she could cut loose—knowing better this time—and just make up for the lost time she’d spent running from Ghostface.

She had talked to Sam about it, and everything was cool and confirmed. It had just been another day, when the sun was up and time was the waning factor. Tara had taken a shower, done her hair, put her makeup on, and dressed in the rather-casual pink, flowered dress Sam had helped her decide on. 

Now, the sun was setting, and she was ready to get the night started. So, she left her bedroom, shut the door, and strode down the hall in search of her older sister. She found her walking out of the kitchen with her head down, so she didn’t notice her presence. 

“Sam,” she called out and successfully gained her attention. She put her arms out, “Here’s the finished look!”

Sam just blinked at her for a moment. That beautiful smile and sparkling eyes that showed pride in her appearance tonight. “You look beautiful,” she answered, though it came out quieter than she meant it.

The other didn’t seem to notice though as she gave a small sway, “Thank you.” A small sigh then left her, before she caught the fading light in the curtains. “I’m gonna head out now, see if Chad and Mindy are ready.” She retrieved her backpack off of the chair and swung it onto her back. “I love you.” 

There was no response, just approaching footsteps, which made the younger Carpenter look up to find Sam a blur, before she was suddenly pulled into a hug. 

Sam’s grip was tight, her face burying into the crook of Tara’s neck. Tara wrapped her arms around her sister’s torso to return the affection, but then she felt her body give a small shudder. And then she heard the sniffle and stifled sob. Her heart dropped. “Sam?” Despite her confusion, she rubbed a soothing line up and down the other’s back, but this just made the hold on her grow stronger. “Sammy, what’s wrong?”

Samantha didn’t pick up her head or let her go in the slightest. She swallowed back the sob pushing up her throat, straining her voice to do so. “I don’t want you to go…”

If she were anyone else, she wouldn’t have been able to understand what she’d said, but Tara knew Sam better than anyone, including how to interpret her words through crying. It was a relief to know that nothing was truly wrong with her; in fact, it actually brought a relieved smile to her face as she gave a small laugh. Sam’s body shuddered again, harder this time, which told her she was really breaking down now. “Hey,” she tried to coax her out of tears. “It’s okay, I’m only gonna be gone for a few hours. I’ll be back tomorrow.” Her tone was light and comforting as she continued to rub her older sister’s back.

However, Sam couldn’t stop. She didn’t want Tara to go for even an hour. She just missed her. A lot. Of course, it had to be the night when she wouldn’t be there, that was just her luck. To anyone else, it would seem ridiculous and childish, like a kid experiencing their first day of school and not wanting their parents to leave. But to Sam, it was real, and she couldn’t control it. She didn’t know how to. It was confusing. She often joked how her attachment to her little sister was unhealthy, but she was always assured that it was a mutual feeling. They were each other’s addictive drug. “I miss you…”

Her younger sister could feel tears dripping down her neck. “Oh, Sam. It’s okay,” she comforted. “You won’t be alone, remember? Danny’s gonna come over and he’s gonna stay the night with you.” As she said this, she could feel Sam shaking her head.

Sam loved Danny, she did. But she wanted her Tara.

“Sammy.” Tara gathered the strength to push Sam away from her, holding her by the shoulders, so she could talk to her face. Her sibling’s dark eyes looked black, surrounded by her bloodshot scleras. She reached up, wiped the tears from her cheeks, and gave her a smile. “Don’t cry. I won’t be gone long. I’ll text you and call you, and you can text or call me any time you want,” she assured her. “We can even FaceTime before you go to bed, if you want.”

This seemed to help, but Sam still couldn’t shake the relentless, desperate feeling of wanting to be near Tara. However, she knew that this dance was something her little sister had been looking forward to, so she also didn’t want to keep her from going. It was just hard, when she had these moments. She swallowed back the million words she wanted to say to make Tara stay and nodded.

Though, the other could still see the small trembling of her lip and glossy saturation of her eyes. “Be strong for me, okay? I know you can do it. I’ll be back tomorrow.” 

Like a devoted dog begging their owner to stay, a small whine came from the older Carpenter’s throat as she suppressed more tears. 

“Don’t cry,” came another reminder, before Tara reached up and guided Sam back into her embrace with her face in her neck. Sam held on tight, and so did her sister, who pressed a loving kiss to her temple, then laid her head against her. “I love you.”

Her big sister sniffled and nodded. “I love you too…” But it was barely above a whisper.

And as if on cue, there was a knock at the apartment door and Danny came in. Sam didn’t move away from Tara, but at Danny’s quickly concerned face, Tara reassured him by mouthing, “She’s okay.”

He nodded and came a little closer, placing a soft hand on Sam’s back. “What’s going on?”

Tara felt Sam’s arms hold her tighter when he touched her, as if she were afraid he was going to pull her away. “She doesn’t want me to go. She’s gonna miss me,” she answered.

He understood immediately and repeated the same words she had said. “She’ll be back tomorrow, Sam. It’ll be alright.”

Now that he was involved, Sam seemed to be able to compose herself enough to let her sister go. She sniffled and wiped her eyes as she backed away into him. He hugged her from behind and leaned over to kiss her flushed cheek. “I’m not gonna leave you,” he whispered into her ear.

She nodded, but she couldn’t take her eyes away from Tara, who resituated her backpack and met her gaze.

“I love you, Sammy,” she said.

She was still smiling and still shining, even though there were stray tears on her shoulder. 

She deserved this. And Sam could live with it. She knew Tara was going to go to this dance from the start, even when these feelings started to haunt her midday.

She would never ever keep Tara from living her life.

“I love you too, Tara.”

Not anymore.

───────────────────────────

@michiganstray 🩶

[luveline]

small vent (please don’t read if it will stress you out or if you’re young — cw of past self harm and unhappiness but I am in no active danger and there’s nothing to worry about, but also just mentioning that in case someone were to open this and then get surprised by the content)

I feel so lonely lately and I don’t know what to do because i feel like I am making an effort to connect with people, maybe I’m not, but I feel as though I am and it’s just really frustrating to have that disconnect of what I feel like I’m doing and the actual result of it, I feel like no one really wants to talk to me, does that make sense? Like I can’t actually have a conversation with anyone, and I’m not blaming anyone for this, because I’m not a good conversationalist, this isn’t me trying to make bad people out of anybody at all but just I’m so frustrated and so lonely and it’s not getting any better. and of course as tends to happen I feel like, really down( and like time is slipping through my fingers, and I feel like I can’t do anything I want to do because I end up worrying or upset about something instead, I can’t stop thinking about stuff I’ve said or things I need to do or things other people have said and what I thought they’re thinking of me. I used to basically feel like this all the time a few years ago but it was going away, until recently when I feel very alone and like it’s worse than it was. I also feel super pathetic once again for putting this here instead of a diary but it’s hard sometimes to not want to know what you guys think, like —is this normal? I worry I’m too concerned with myself

I’ve also been thinking a lot for the last few weeks about hurting myself, because I used to in the past. I won’t do it of course and like if I were to do it it’s not as though I would want to mention that here because I know it’s catching and it hurts people because hurting yourself shouldn’t be presented as an option and it isn’t an option, so I won’t do it, but I do want to hurt myself because I just don’t feel well!! I actually did contact my doctor a few days ago to talk about how I am and my health but they haven’t gotten back to me yet. I know that it’s not how you should cope with bad feelings, but it’s also the only thing that’s ever worked for me

I think all in all I feel really alone, and I feel like I’m always embarrassing myself, like, I feel like the people around me are embarrassed of me. I don’t know why I feel so bad and if it’s normal or not. Like, should I more urgently go and see my doctor, or does everyone struggle feeling such low self esteem? I know life is hard for everybody, and for many much harder than I’ll ever experience, and so I’m caught feeling very ashamed of myself and alone, and like I’m doing things wrong but unaware of it. It’s a relief at least to not be suicidal because in the past I would get so anxious about things I would get tunnel vision and I’d need it to stop, whereas now I just feel quite depressed (sorry if that’s the wrong word) about it. I wish I could identify what it is that’s throwing me off kilter so badly. I hope it’s okay to talk about this here because I don’t think anyone will understand in my life how I’m feeling, I try to talk about it with my mam sometimes but she’s not the most empathetic person, or like she’s too empathetic maybe, and if I tell her I’m feeling depressed she’ll say me too and then guide the conversation about her life without really giving me a chance to speak to her about what’s really on my mind, or she might tell me (again) to go on ozempic (which I do not medically need). And I love my sisters but I can’t tell them either, so it’s just like desperately wanting to confide in someone, but everyone else is too busy

I think my life is just a black hole forever, you know, I don’t mean to be upset about it because things are better than they were, but it’s hard knowing that I’m not experiencing what other people are, and that I’m not connecting with people, and that I’m hard to like

[end-of-update-blog]

Thank you for your encouraging messages, anon. In Apex, where I currently draw a lot of fan art, there are ships that haven't become completely canon, but are clearly favored by the game developers, and when they sometimes come into view unexpectedly, it makes me feel very upset. I hope there are people who like the fanon art I draw.

And from here on, I'll once again be writing about my recent daily grievances on this blog, which I thought had stopped updating. If you don't want to read them, please ignore the following paragraphs (I'm feeling very lonely in my new place, where I've abandoned my old handle name, so please forgive me for wanting to vent my frustrations in such a visible place)

My sister, who was the direct cause of me abandoning my old handle, seems to have developed some kind of facial abnormality, and has turned down the job she was offered and is staying at home all this time. And, as hard as it may be to believe, she spends her time lazing around, dubbing the fish she keeps in a very harsh, high-pitched falsetto, and singing alone. Even when I ask my family if they can do something about my sister, they just brush it off by saying, "She has a disease that's causing her face to look strange." From my perspective, I can't understand why my sister, who doesn't work, devours sweets and juices that aren't included in the meals provided, and lives a life that reverses her day and night cycle, can't work. From my perspective, as someone who goes to work every day in the hot sun and works hard, my sister just seems to be relying on the family's savings. It really makes me sick to think that some of the money I've earned is being used to support my sister's lifestyle...

Although my work at the office is worthwhile, I often receive requests to do work that is outsourced, and my salary is not commensurate with my salary. My colleagues jokingly tell me that I should receive outsourcing fees, but if I actually asked for that amount, I would probably be fired.

Even though I draw pictures as an outlet for my frustrations at work, I don't have the skills to do so, and so my work doesn't get as many views as it used to (although maybe it just feels that way because I hate my sister so much). The work is hard, my hobbies aren't rewarding, and when I get home, the source of my stress is there. I have no way to release my stress!

Furthermore, my sister previously hid the fact that she was overweight online, which meant that she was unable to meet people even when they arranged to meet up offline, and as a result, people she had made plans to meet in the future got angry and cut ties with her, and now it seems she is repeating the same thing. It breaks my heart to think that more people will be hurt because of my sister.

I think the only way for me to escape this situation is to leave my parents' home and force myself to change my environment. First, I'm planning a reckless plan, but Nintendo has been recruiting for career graphic designers since December last year, so I'm going to apply there, even if it seems like a long shot. I'm also thinking of applying to other companies. I'm no longer at an age where I can be considered young, and I have no intention of getting married in the future, so I need to become independent in order to make a living with my skills. In that sense, I'm relying too much on my family, so I'm telling myself that I need to work harder.

And I think I need to get better at drawing. Of course I need a main job as a source of income, but if I can get some work from my drawing to a certain extent, nothing would make me happier. A long time ago, when I was drawing pictures of Wander Over Yonder, I had no intention of becoming famous, I was just expressing what I wanted to express. I want to get back to that feeling and work hard on art production...

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi cas, turnip anon here, this might be a long one

Firstly, I think I’m going to start using she/they pronouns, mainly online, I don’t really feel like putting them to use in person, not yet. And I do think I am a demigirl. And I like that label, I think it works well for me

So, that’s that update. But I’m actually more here to vent, if you don’t mind

About 2 years ago I stopped going to school. I was severely depressed, and the effort of getting into school was causing panic attacks upon panic attacks, it was awful. This pretty much happened for a year, where I would be going into school about once every 2 weeks, and when I did go in, I didn’t go to any lessons. I was put on a school avoidance plan, thingy idk what it was tbh. But I had goals to go in 3 times a week for an hour. It didn’t work, nothing worked, so May 2023, I snapped one morning and I told my mum that I couldn’t do it anymore, and she pulled me out of school to start being homeschooled.

It was a big change, and I struggled with it. I always struggled taking work home, like with homework. To me, school was where you learn, and home was where you didn’t. So having my home also being my place of education was difficult. I didn’t end up doing much. I enrolled in this learning centre in my town, and I took a maths course so I was doing something, it just wasn’t much. I hated it there, there was no communication between the teachers and you were placed in front of a computer and told to work for 3 hours straight. Addition to that, the man in charge of the maths course made me very uncomfortable. He often singled me out and spoke to me a lot more than the other people there. I did not enjoy being there. Twas bad

A couple months ago I finished the maths course there, and I took the final test and got a score of i dont even know what, I don’t understand the grading system.

So, this was kinda background information, like I said, this might be a long one

During the 2 years of struggling with school and then being homeschooled, I have been very isolated. I live in a small town away from all of my friends, my older sister is at university, and the town I live in is not the kind of town you meet people in my age range. So for about 2 years, I have been very alone.

I never really liked interacting with people, I still don’t, but I miss having people around me. I miss my sister, she lives just under 2 hours away so I don’t see her too often. I visit her, and sometimes I stay with her and her friends (who are amazing), and those times when I’m there are my favourite because I’m with people I like. Her friends really are amazing, one of her friends, ‘insert friends name’, is autistic like me so when we’re together we just tism about our special interests and hyperfixations. It’s great.

But I miss my 2 friends at school, we hardly talk anymore, and when we do, conversation doesn’t seem to flow easily because we haven’t seen eachother in ages. I hardly know them anymore. I’ve been lying to myself, saying that it’s fine, that I’m fine, but I snapped today. Finally, it was long overdue. But today was prom. I didn’t know, I went on Instagram and saw posts from other people that were in my year group all dressed up saying ‘prom 2024!’ And then I saw one of my friends post and she looked incredible, like really amazing. But I wasn’t there, and I didn’t know, and I missed out. And I have missed out so much and I’m never going to have any of this opportunity again and I feel like I’ve wasted 2 years of my life alone in my bedroom doing absolutely fuck all

I’ve been crying nearly all day, I’ve never been happier to be home alone.

I am so lonely. I don’t feel like I have any friends anymore. My childhood best friend lives 3 hours away, we never message, and we are very different people. We have nothing in common, and I know I shouldn’t but I’m starting to hold it against her. When I do visit her she spends so much of our time together on her phone messaging her other friends or her boyfriend, and it’s so difficult to be around her.

I have nobody to talk to. Nobody talks to me. And I am miserable

I’m going to this college in September, but it is tiny. And I mean, three people in a class. That kind of tiny. I was going to go to this other place but that’s a whole other story and I feel like if I get into that, this will go on for pages.

But, the other place was pretty big. There were a lot of people going there, and then I didn’t get in, and I was really upset. I was looking forward to being in a big environment with lots of people around me. I would of been able to hide away but not be alone. There would of been more opportunities. But I’m not going there, I’m going to some other place. And, okay, it is a nice place, and it seems like, on an educational level, it will be good for me. I know this. But how am I supposed to hide away when it’s one of those places where everyone knows everyone. I know I wanted human interaction, but not that much. My plan for the other place was to hide away and maybe make one friend. I WONT BE ABLE TO DO THAT THERE everything that I had planned for just went bye bye and flew out the window

I don’t even know what I’m saying anymore but I am not okay, I am struggling

I miss my friends, I missed the prom, I didn’t even know about the prom, I miss my sister, I’ve wasted my life, I have zero skills, I have no hobbies and I’m a pathetic waste of space. And nobody cares because nobody knows because nobody asks because nobody is here because I am so alone

And I really wish I wasn’t

Woah, woah, woah, take a deep breath!

Your last paragraph: None of it is true! Listen, I went through something similar in high school- panic attacks, missing a lot of school, feeling removed from my friends, all of that. I was even schooled online for a while.

Here's the thing- I know how you feel. There are certain things that I missed during the time I went to school online, and it made me upset. But the good news is, your life isn't over. You haven't wasted anything. You don't have zero skills and people DO care (I promise. I care).

Just because your high school experience was different doesn't mean you did it wrong. And just because it was different doesn't mean you ruined your life.

You will ALWAYS have more opportunities. Will they be exactly the same ones? Probably not. But they will be just as exciting, just as fulfilling, and just as wonderful.

So now, I think you have a chance to really work on this before college. Try to find a therapist and some coping mechanisms, that way when you get to college, you're ready to take advantage of every opportunity available! Because trust me, everyone outside of high school will tell you: it's not the highlight of your life, whether you go to prom or not. The best parts are still to come <3

If you ever need to talk, I'm here, okay!

[someone-elsa]

(part 1 of 2)

🔙 Chapter beginning ⬅ Previous chapter • Next part ➡ 📝 About the story and characters

The whole chapter (with bigger pictures!) can be found on Blogger already ;) Check the Blogger post for a short recap too.

"Parenting is finally getting easier. The first six months were challenging, every day felt a thousand hours long. Now she's not crying that much and we can actually go to places and…"

River knew close to nothing about parenting but patiently listened to Sara's venting. She believed she owed her that after rejecting her as a romantic partner — even though River had said they would have not future together.

They had gone for a walk a few times and it had started to become a weekly routine.   "And before you say I should ask for help," Sara said, "I have asked and Kody has helped a lot but ultimately, I'm alone. With Bayu of course, but you know what I mean."

"I… guess," River said. Sara seemed ready to change subjects so River asked: "What are your plans about school?"   "I'll go back. I'm still not 100% certain if dentistry is my thing but I have no other ideas, so… Not until next year, though. I want Maya to be a little older before daycare."

"Understandable," River said even though she knew nothing about babies in daycare.   Sara smirked. "Nice of you to listen to me babbling about parenting. I know it can't be your favourite subject but it sure is nice to vent. Maya isn't much of a conversational partner yet. Thank you."

"Hey I'm always interested in listening to my friends! Whatever the subject!"   "In that case… I do have another thing on my mind."

Sara dug her phone out and opened the browser.   "Check this out," she said after navigating to a certain news site. "Some theatre critic has visited The Bats's rehearsal."

River quickly scanned the article to find the worrying part. For two long paragraphs, the critic had wondered if hiring Harrison Stacks to direct the musical was a risk worth taking. Some of his work had been astounding flops. This was neither new nor worrisome for River; her father's reputation as a wild card was well-known. It was the next paragraph about the actors that had made Sara uneasy.

The leading actors (Bayu Wardhana and Jaylah Ortega) have impeccable chemistry, the article read. Watching them embrace each other and sing about love, I felt I was interrupting an actual couple getting ready for bed — if you know what I mean. It was so intense it was almost umcomfortable... I felt warm and fuzzy inside — and I don't mean in my heart! If the whole musical is like this, I'm going to see it multiple times!

"Hmmmm… Have you asked him about this?"   "He says it's just a job. That Jaylah is just a colleague and that I should be proud of him being so good at his job. I mean, of course I am. And I know he is truly charming and charismatic, I wouldn't be here pushing a pram if he wasn't…" Sara sighed. "But… I don't know…"

River hadn't realised Sara cared about Bayu so much. She had thought they had only an arrangement to give Maya a stable family, not a true romantic relationship. Maybe that had been the case at the beginning but Sara was quick to fall in love. River wondered if Bayu was on the same page.

River wasn't sure of what to say. Her sister Brook was working in the production as the head makeup designer. When asked about the musical, Brook had fussed about how sweet Bayu was, always giving compliments, and how he was liked by everyone. And he was cute for someone so short (Brook's words!). River wasn't going to repeat her report.   "Brook works on the production, remember? She would tell me if there's anything to know. She couldn't resist spilling the beans."

Sara sighed again. "I must have been overreacting. I'll try to focus on other things."   River knew how hard it was to not think about something bothersome. In that morning, her hands had felt… different. Like she couldn't fully control them. She shuddered.

Sara's phone vibrated demandingly. "Ugh, it's mom. She has tried to call me many times already, I'll need to take this."

And immediately, Little Maya was awake. She wasn't happy about it. "Wah! Wah! WAAAAAAH!"   Sara let out a hopeless sigh. "Could you hold her? This shouldn't take long."

River gulped. Her hands did still feel shaky but it wasn't something she felt like sharing. "I… I think I might have a cold coming. I shouldn't touch her…"   Sara looked her suspiciously and River coughed. "Fine. Can you at least rock the pram and talk to her?"   "…Sure."

"Yes, mom? You indeed hear Maya crying. No, a friend is looking after her. Well, she's trying her best."   Sara walked further and River couldn't hear her over Maya's cries.

"There there, little one, look how beautiful and blue the sky is."   But Maya wasn't interested in watching the sky.

"Hey now, I'll buy you ice cream," River tried and Maya's crying toned down a bit. "When you'll get older, of course. Your mum wouldn't probably appreciate me getting you ice cream now... Anyway, in the future, you'll get the biggest sundae, any flavour you want, with whipped cream, sprinkles, chocolate sauce... A shiny tiny umbrella on it..."

She came up with a dozen more toppings and Maya fell asleep again.   "Good one, River, no child can resist ice cream," River whispered to herself. "How does Sara do this all day every day? Mothers are really something."

Notes: I think I have wondered which language Kody and Sara talk with their mom in some previous chapter's notes but I can't remember to what conclusion I came (I should write stuff like this down...). Maybe Sim!Japanese because even though she was born in Sulani, she sort of detests the place. Thinks it's not classy enough for her 🙄

[giggly-squiggily]

SQ-SQ-SQUIGGILY :D so happy to see you're back and that you're doing better, i hope the universe is nothing but kind to you in the month of the rainbow ♡♡

i watched the new demon slayer episode today and it made me think something and right after i saw you were back and i was like gasp :o so here's the thingy for you, i hope you can enjoy it a little bit <3

the infamous sanemi-tanjiro-dynamic in the modern au

quick timeline on tanjiro meeting the hashira: shinobu at 3 (him and kanao are in the same kindergarten) - giyuu at 6 (he starts going to urokodaki's dojo where giyuu trains) - kyojuro at 7 (nezuko befriends senjuro in kindergarten) - sanemi at 9 (he befriends genya in school)

so when sanemi first meets tanjiro he is fifteen years old and has every problem in the world which is a great mindset to meet him in (this is also pre-self-reflection-arc-sanemi we're talking about here so he's basically in crisis mode 24/7)

what happens is that he picks up genya after school and genya is standing there with another kid. and they're talking and seem like they're having a good time. which is weird because genya literally does not have friends.

the shinazugawa kids all struggle with being ostracized to some extent because of all the horrible gossip surrounding the drama with their dad and the bad rep sanemi usually gets which leads to his younger siblings being bullied more often than he'd like ("your big brother beat up my big brother so i'm gonna hate you forever")

so when he comes to pick up genya and sees this other kid there he's immediately alarmed because who is this kid? should i know this kid? has genya told me about this kid? why is he talking to genya? is he making fun of genya? are they laughing with each other or is he laughing at genya?

when he gets to them genya is immediately all excited and introduces sanemi to his new friend tanjiro kamado who smiles and bows and says "it's very nice to meet you!" and even tho he can't really put his finger on it sanemi immediately Does Not Like This Kid™

but then tanjiro's little sister comes running out the gate and jumps into his arms and oh. oh that's why.

because him and his siblings don't do this in public. that's what he drilled into them because if people see his innocent little baby siblings be super close to their rotten big brother? no thank you, sanemi would like them to have a shot at finding friends and being accepted. but just because it's his own policy doesn't mean he has to like it and when genya asks if he can go to tanjiro's place the next day sanemi says maybe and glares at tanjiro to make him stop smiling (he doesn't)

for the next two months or so tanjiro is all genya ever talks about and sanemi hates it hates it hates it

"tanjiro shared his lunch with me!" i'm sorry i didn't have time to make you something today. "tanjiro introduced me to a lot of other kids at the playground!" i'm sorry they all run away when i take you there. "tanjiro always protects his siblings when they get picked on at school!" i'm sorry i can't be there when they pick on you. "tanjiro always goes to visit his father's grave with his siblings!" we don't do that here. "tanjiro says it's important to talk about bad things that happened!" we don't do that here. "tanjiro says we should try to forgive so we can heal!" we don't do that here. "why not?" i don't know.

is sanemi aware that he's jealous of an elementary schooler? yes. and he does have the decency to feel bad about it and he's aware he should be happy for genya that he found a friend. because of course he's glad that genya befriended another kid but did it have to be this kid?

saving comes in the form of 17 year old tengen listening to sanemi vent about this nine year old and going "you're actually embarrassing yourself right now"

"excuse me?" - "you really wanna be pissed that genya found a friend?" - "that's not what this is." - "sure looks like it." - "fuck you, actually." - "dude, are you even hearing yourself? that kid is nine, you should be happy to see that someone whose situation is similar to yours is handling it so well at such a young age." - "oh because i didn't handle it well?" - "you're not listening to me." - "you're talking down on me!" - "you're not listening to me."

and tengen shuts this shit down SO FAST when he goes "have you ever stopped to think that genya might try to be more like kamado instead of wanting you to be more like kamado?" and sanemi's words get stuck in his throat because he does tend to forget that genya is an older brother too. and now that he thinks about it, maybe genya is a lot warmer and more attentive to their younger siblings ever since he started hanging out with that kamado kid.

"i know you're not asking me but if you ask me, that's the best kind of friend genya can have. think about it. kamado could be the shittiest older brother too and you don't want that man. because i'm a shitty older brother and if that was me hanging out with genya i would spoil him so fast. i would absolutely ruin that kid that you put so much effort into raising well, but i'm not hanging out with genya because you raised him well and he knows what a good role model looks like and how he can grow from having a goid role model. that kid is so much like you, shinazugawa. would be a real fucking shame if you didn't let him be himself too."

sanemi is a lot less hostile towards tanjiro after that and he even feels better when genya is with tanjiro because he knows that genya will be fine. and tanjiro might be a bit apprehensive towards him after he sees sanemi roughhouse with sumi, but it doesn't take him long to figure out that it's all out of love and if sanemi gets a small ego boost from hearing tanjiro whisper to genya that his older brother is really cool, no one needs to know.

that being said, giyuu brings this kid along way too often and people under 18 should be officially banned from their board game nights because if he has to sit through one more lecture from kanae about keeping his language pg 13 he's gonna do something very illegal

REY! :D I appreciate it! I wish I could say things have been sunny on Squiggily's street but if I'm being honest I've been burned a few times within the first two weeks of rainbow month akrearjkeajr But we're thriving!

AHH I LOVE THIS HOLY- Sanemi in crisis mode 24/7 bless him; and the siblings struggling to make friends due to gossip and Sanemi's actions- God my heart 😭

Sanemi going into mild panic mode like: "Who is THAT?" jajrekjrjae and instantly not liking Tanjiro is such a canon event arjeakjrkjaerjke "He glares at Tanjiro to make him stop smiling (he doesn't) KJEJKRJKeKJRJWJKRJK

Tengen coming through with his sage advice and mirror words- we love to see it! Him shutting down all of Sanemi's BS is so true and real and YES.

HIS WITTLE EGO BOOST! I can totally see Sanemi puffing up some with pride hearing that; he's grinning to himself cause 'hell yeah- I've made a good impression' but he also feels bad too cause he was so aggro towards him for his own selfish reasons in the beginning- grateful that Tanjiro didn't run at the first sight; god- who was cutting onions right now- he must have got the dish soap in his eyes somehow-

KRERJEJKRJKE Giyu bringing them all like "I got the cabbage patch kids" ajkrkjelarkjejr Kanae adores them even if she has to lecture Sanemi on language- the first few nights they've all learned new words they shouldn't be using. Sanemi eventually has to make code words to express what he's mad about eventually- no one knows what "For Flock's Sake!" means but Kanae's happy and Nezuko isn't casually dropping F bombs in class anymore so it all worked out.

This is gold; thank you so much for sharing Rey! I love this so much AHHH!!!

[borderline-culture-is]

TW: Vent

BPD culture is WHY DID I THINK I'D BE ENOUGH? Of course I fucking wouldn't be. What the fuck? My fp has a fucking boyfriend! Fucking fantastic!!!/s I'm aro, I don't have romantic feelings for them, I shouldn't be upset at all, but here we fucking are. They always try to make me feel safe, they wrote me fanfiction, they send me "I love you more" messages, and I get constant affection and I feel weirdly betrayed because what the fuck??? How? Why? I'm not that shocked because they are amazing and deserve the fucking world but also, they never brought that up. And I feel so fucking betrayed because I would slit my wrists for this person and they are the best fucking thing to ever happen to me and I thought it was mutual because I got so much affection and I thought they told me I'm their favourite(besides their sister and dogs) but now maybe my brain was just exaggerating and maybe they did but what the actual fuck?!?!?! Why is there a person more important than me again??? WHY ME AGAIN??? It's similar to the situation with my ex fp but now I actually get affection. But maybe it was all a fucking lie, not like I don't deserve it. It was just today that they completely freaked out when they thought I was mad at them and the message I got was so similar to the ones I would send but apparently everything was a fucking lie. I'm not the first choice again. But this time I actually believed wholeheartedly I was because I'm dumb as fuck. But no, it's okay, there's just someone higher up in the hierarchy. Fantastic. I thought I was the most important but of course I'm fucking not. Who's surprised. Me. Somehow. It was expected. I got told shit along the lines of "people sometimes feel like additions. Not you though" and apparently I wasn't the least additiony person. THEY SENT ME THEIR SCHEDULE WITH TIMES THEY COULD/COULDN'T TEXT BUT APPARENTLY I WAS NOT THE FIRST CHOICE. They texted me so much and always ended their day with sending me a goodnight message because we texted until they fell asleep. But maybe they stayed up to talk to their boyfriend after they were done with me. It would make sense. HOW DIDN'T THEY TELL ME THEY HAVE A BOYFRIEND??? Everybody I care about knows about them. But they couldn't tell me they had a fucking boyfriend??? They weren't even excited to talk about the guy at all but they felt excited to talk about their dogs a few weeks back(they said they weren't in a ranty mood today). I feel bad for hoping they don't actually care about their boyfriend, but I just want to be the most important. They said they have notifications for when I post. But apparently I'm not that important. I literally got a text that said "i would take all of you so that nobody else could have you, and would display your body on an altar so that people are forced to come and worship you like a god" but apparently they have a boyfriend. Great. Fantastic. And then we were sending each other the excited random letter thingy(ex. ofnsudjdyxjsnjscojc) while I was sobbing. And now I have to talk to them like they didn't just completely break my irrational as fuck heart. I have to act like seeing their notifications doesn't feel like being stabbed repeatedly because I was pathetic enough to believe I was important enough for them to be their favourite. It's okay, that's going to be fine/s(also I just noticed how I wrote some of the things they will probably keep doing in past tense and that felt like a punch in the gut)

-💜🥀🔪

.

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 160

sniblings

i was gonna summarize their backstory in the tags but even the summary literally got too long so TRAGIC BACKSTORY UNDER THE CUT

nobody likes Szelseis (manlet on the left). everybody likes Szuna (snake bod on the right). even their mom! this is due to circumstances outside of szelseis's control (ie Snerson Societal Hierarchy)

their mom, for reference, is genuinely a fucking monster. but shes nice to her daughter at least. Szuna feels... Some affection for her, for this reason. She's seen mom's "softer side." Szelseis wants their mother dead.

Szuna tries very hard to relate to her little brother but really does very little to actually improve his circumstances because well. she doesnt want to be treated the way people treat him. and standing up for him might get her tossed to the bottom of the social hierarchy alongside him.

but she wants to be there for him emotionally. and he trusts her more than anyone else for sure. she is the closest thing he has to a friend in this world.

so Szelseis vents to her about wanting revenge on their entire community. Szuna listens to him and offers sympathy but like. She doesn't take him literally when he expresses a desire to "leave town and burn the place to the ground behind them." shes just like haha yeah we should anyway good night

of course he immediately decides that he is old enough to make it on his own in the world ESPECIALLY if his older sister is backing him up, and then attempts to burn the town to the ground. (He's like, maybe 15 at the time.) he does a pretty good job of it, too! he starts of course with their mom's place in an attempt to kill her, but also makes sure the fire is set to spread.

by the time Szuna realizes what's going on, it's too late to stop him. so she confronts him and tries to at LEAST get him to help fight the fires but he's just mad that she lied about agreeing with him on this. has she ALWAYS been on their mom's side??

and she wants to be like "no i just don't condone mass murder like really this is an ENTIRE TOWN theres like KIDS AND STUFF not LITERALLY EVERYONE has been SO mean to you that they deserve to burn to death what the fuck are you DOING" but the fire is spreading and if he's not going to help then she will get to him LATER. bigger priorities right now.

While she's busy firefighting, Szelseis flees town and basically goes "FUCK everybody the world is terrible everyone is out to get me TRUST NO BITCH i am going to have to Treat My Self from here on out." so he becomes a shitty solipsistic little thief, trying to build up enough of a fortune to live in luxury for the rest of his life.

Szuna, meanwhile, manages to save their mom from the fire, and the first thing she asks her daughter to do is hunt down Szelseis and bring him back, dead or alive, she no longer gives a shit.

Szuna of course has mixed feelings about this. But she does what shes told anyway and sets off, figuring she can just.... Decide what to do about Szelseis when she finds him.

Maybe they'll fight, maybe they'll hug, maybe they'll run away from their shitty mom together, maybe they'll straight up kill each other.

WHO KNOWS!!! thats main story territory babey this is just the backstory

[the-blue-fairie]

hey, no worries at all about venting in the tags of... your reblog of my reblog of your post, lol!! as i mentioned, i was trying to find a completely different old post by someone else, and then ended up seeing your post in my search and i just feel that it's a great explanation of some of the issues that i have with the ending. i can totally understand why people who like the idea behind the ending and what the writers were trying to say with it want to defend it, to an extent, but i agree with you that they just didn't successfully say that. which only makes me more frustrated with the ending than i imagine i would've been otherwise. and i'm sorry people have been trying to group you in with frozen 2 haters when you didn't want to be seen that way! and to me, the posts of yours that i've read about the movie (including the one i reblogged that prompted this ask) never came off that way either. you always seemed like someone who had your issues with it and criticisms of it, but could also still see positives in it and things to celebrate about it.

Thank you for sending me this message. I apologize for not replying for a day; life got a bit busy.

Looking back on my old discussions of F2, I feel I was hamstrung by not wanting to make my friends angry. I have friends who are fans of F2 and, while I wrote those posts, I was cripplingly scared that they would stop being friends with me, or unfollow me, or dismiss my critiques as mere negativity. In fact, my fears were justified. Some of these people DID unfollow me and DID tell me I was being overwhelmingly negative. This broke my heart - especially because I spilled so much ink trying to balance every negative I discussed with a positive and celebrating the good elements, but it felt like it didn't matter. It didn't matter how anxious I was to be understood, it didn't matter that I was writing in good faith. And that hurt.

I also feel that I was intimidated by the extreme sides of the fandom. If, for example, I wrote a post criticizing Elsa's arc, anti-Elsa people could jump on it and say, "See, this is why Elsa is a bad sister."

So that's why, in my vent, I said I was too kind to the film. I was so constricted by being terrified of other people's reactions - terrified of having an unpopular opinion. So I qualified all my statements with, "Of course, I don't mean to be overly negative" instead of just focusing on my points.

I just want to shake people sometimes when they tell me the point of the film and say, "They followed through on their intent with very poor execution. They DIDN'T DO the things you are saying they did. They tried, but there are scores of reasons why they did not succeed - reasons that go beyond my personal preference, that have to do with characterization, pacing, story structure, etc."

It hurts because... I feel like, in the past, I tried to force myself to like the film more than I do. I've wanted to like it for years, but the last time I put it on I broke down crying and not in a good way and I just... I wish it worked. I wish that all the various thematic threads coalesced into an emotionally satisfying whole. And I know that, because of my emotional response, people might just dismiss all my discussion - no matter how nuanced I am, no matter how fair towards the film I am in my analysis, as, "Well, you're biased from the start."

No. I've spent years trying to see all sides, empathizing with a variety of people in the fandom, sometimes even at my own expense. I do value the parts of F2 that work and acknowledge the beauty of various elements including Anna and Elsa bonding with the Northuldra, the anticolonialist themes, The Next Right Thing, and more.

But at the same time, I argue that my case against other aspects of the film is robust, cohesive, and correct.

And to the friends that can see I am writing not to be a hater, but in good faith with actual analysis and discussion in mind - you mean the world to me. Thank you.

Sorry, this became kind of a vent in itself.

[aceofbooks-creative-anthologies]

Bear with me 🙏 I think it's actually kind of insane that canonically 1st selection takes place over the course of less than like two weeks? (Someone check my math, it has been categorically bad on this blog so far). So in the AU for the selfship, there's like a week between each set of match ups (so Team Z has a week between their game against X and Y etc.).

There's a visitor's day in the week leading up to the first matches, a visitor's day in the week between Y vs Z and W vs Z, and a third in the aftermath of the end of the 1st selection, but before they move onto the 2nd.

I go to the second visitor's day with Chigiri's parents on their request. They're worried that he might not be giving it his all and might get kicked from the program. They think I'll inspire him or something; they keep citing my new PRs at my last couple of meets (they've become quite... attached to me since he left home).

Barou's actually the first to find me. He's looking to brag about his win against team Z, and I'm not exactly looking forward to seeing Chigiri, so I entertain him. Chigiri does eventually see me, and he's instantly fuming about Barou, whom I seem bored by, but not enraged (as he might have hoped). He's petrified by the memory of the "conversation" with Barou about me crying because of him. I can feel Chigiri staring daggers into the back of my head, but the longer he refuses to come say hi, the longer I'm determined to keep listening to Barou (he's right off his loss to team Y, so he's looking to vent to someone and his entire team does sound pretty incompetent....).

It's eventually Kunigami that comes to my rescue—again. He holds off on taking me to Chigiri, the conversation about me crying also fresh in his mind, and chooses to introduce me to his younger sister instead. Team Z as a whole, Bachira in particular, makes a pretty good attempt at steering me away from Chigiri at every opportunity. It's after a heated debate with Raichi about the most displeasing foods that I find a quiet corner to myself.

I'm taking some deep breaths with my eyes closed when I sense someone sliding down the wall near me. I open my eyes to find the first phone that I've seen any player have. We don't talk to each other, but there is a purple haired boy running around asking about "Nagi" and I can feel my companion trying to dissolve into the wall behind us, muttering about just trying to get through the level. Reo does eventually find us, and I give Nagi a sympathetic look that he doesn't see as he's pulled away.

I manage to continue to avoid Chigiri until it's time for goodbyes, because his parents are my ride. His parents excitedly step away, saying that they'll wait for me in the car. We're quiet for a minute before I clear my throat and say "Good Luck" and then start to walk away. He grabs my hand and I stop, but he doesn't say anything. After another minute of silence, I pull my hand away, and he lets go quickly, as if he forgot that he was holding it. I leave without either of us saying goodbye.

I don't go to the third visitor's day.

[drbased]

Thank you so much for answering ! I was so hesitant about sending that ask because to me it was just an unnecessarily morbid and sad vent, so imagine my surprise when you said it was lovely to receive 😹

I have watched the alt right playbook series when it came out ! I used to be very involved in skeptictube back in the day and everyone recommended it. I'll need to rewatch it ! I was wondering if you had recommandations about the satanic panic specifically, as you mentioned listening to/watching something about it ?

Your paragraph about conspiracy theories is SO on point! I definitely need to translate it and show it to my mother, you worded perfectly what I've been trying to explain to her. Q anon really is a good example of these things because it is exceptionally stupid and extreme.

A few things about the Emmanuel Macron theory :

My father didn't come up with it, he never does. I'm not sure how to say it in english but my father is very influencable, he is very easily convinced by people trying to sell him products (or ideas...). Most of his ideas come from people he follows on twitter and odyssee. As for the theory itself : the idea that Brigitte Macron is actually male is very popular amongst french conspiracy theorists, and I suppose you are not aware, but even without that she is quite the controversial figure. She was the president's teacher in high school and if I remember correctly, when he got his diploma she left her husband for him and they have been together even since. I'm not giving my opinion on this whole debacle because it's above my paycheck lol, but as long as my father has known who this woman is, he has hated her with a burning passion and made it very clear from how he talks about her. Long story short he wants her hanged on the time square 👍. This is all very hypocritical of him considering he never had any moral issues with his sister (my aunt) marrying a man she started dating when she was 12 and he was 28. And never acting up and doing something to help her when he turned out to be abusive. (Shocker I know)

For your answers : I agree with everything apart from the fact that Macron is a right wing politician and my father also wants HIM dead 👍 he wants everybody dead. He used to be anti death penalty and a profound pacifist, but now he cannot dislike things or people normally. Everything becomes extremely violent.

Writing all this has been very cathartic! This situation has been harder and harder to live by the day (I still live with my father after all) and I've been having a bit of a breakdown because of it. It's hard to remain cordial and polite with someone like this everyday, because every activity, every subject of conversation is tainted. It has taken all the joy out of our home life, mine especially. So thank you for hearing me out :) you're really cool

Nice to find another informed and cultured fellow like myself! I'm very glad you're familiar with the alt right playbook. Imo it should be standard 'reading' for any wannabe leftist. My favourite video is the one on 'controlling the conversation' which has entirely shifted how I engage with people online, and is responsible for why you don't see me argue much on here.

Don't worry about being morbid, I'm used to all sorts of things I probably shouldn't burden my fragile mind with. Regardless, I think it's so important that women speak out about our experiences with each other. What I find so fascinating about feminist analysis is that literally every subject you can name will inevitably relate back to some patriarchal ideology/practice - which makes sense because women are 50% of the population and male oppression is so universal that of course it would permeate everything.

Huh, Macron's wikipedia page mentioned associations with the socialist party. And I also figured that it would make sense him being considered left wing, since right wingers are obsessed with emasculated, 'soft' men having left wing politics. However I did originally intend to put 'left wing' in air quotes because I'm aware that even self-proclaimed left wing parties are liberal at best.

Here's the video that sparked my thoughts - it's a much more standard exploration of the history of satanism so there's not much in terms of analysis, just history. I'm getting slowly used to it but now whenever I hear a man speak on a political/philosophical subject, the absence of feminist analysis is palpable. I'm a big fan of breadtube and skeptictube but since I started engaging with feminism I can't help but notice those glaring gaps where they'll say stuff like 'trads want women to go back into the kitchen because they believe that men and women should have certain roles' - they're so deathly afraid to address what those roles are and why they exist, it would be funny if it wasn't frustrating. If I find any better resources on satanism I'll let you know; it would be cool if anyone has any good book recommendations on things like satanism, conspiracy theories etc. from a feminist point of view. (I think Gyn/ecology might touch on it? I've not got a copy unfortunately).

I am very unsurprised that your father is fine with a age gap between an older man and woman but not the other way round. It's one of the oldest double standards in the book, I'd wager! Also unsurprised about the sharp turn to loving violence in all forms. It's funny isn't it, how the absurdity of qanon is so obvious - it's been said before by women on here that there seems to be something so enticing about these farcical ideologies. I think people like confidence, they like the idea of being sure against all odds, and the more ridiculous the assumption the more you have to take it in on faith - and then you're locked in, because admitting it was wrong will eventually require you admit it's also patently absurd. I think a lot of people just don't want to take that leap. There are a lot of books on how to escape cults that might be of interest? Combating Cult Mind Control by Stephen Hassan comes to mind - I haven't read it but I've heard good things about it.

I didn't know you still live with him - that's incredibly tough. I can strongly imagine how difficult that would make day-to-day life. I have experienced something similar before. Not being able to talk freely with loved ones in your own home really does change something inside you, I think. I'm glad writing it all out has been cathartic for you - we women need to do this more, our experiences need to be heard and documented. I hate the fact that because of our visibility online we can never give too much away, but there are ways around it I think. It's been so incredibly cathartic for me to write - it's made me feel not crazy, it's given me focus and purpose. Anyway, best of luck to you, I hope you get out of that situation as soon as possible, or at least find some way of making it more palatable for yourself.

[piratefrog006]

My mom just told me while having dinner that she's completely given up on me, and that's the reason why she won't get herself to treat me better.

What the fuck is actually wrong with this woman.

This seems like a lot, but I've just been slowly descending into this very deep depression, for 2.5 years now, after realizing everything that's happened to me while growing up(accepting my parents are narcissists, sa, ed's, my family turning back on me, etc...) and now because I don't know what to do with my life and I, well really just want to die, not that severely, just not be here right now (which by the way my family has turned a completely blind eye on it, it's actually amazing how many hoops they can jump to avoid accepting that something is wrong with me) so add that to dropping out of not one, but two schools in the last two years, well she says she's done with me, that I can do whatever I want (she's so kicking me out the day I turn 18, she won't admit it, or say it to my face, but in true insane mom fashion, she's gonna do it).

And because of all of that I really have no one to turn to right now, this is very much just a giant vent because I really have no clue on what to do, but I'm gonna be okey, everything will work out in my favor.

Ps: it's summer in Spain (where I live), and naturally there's lots of bugs, especially because we live on the mountain and my house is surrounded by red sand and rocks but my bedroom is the only one that is directly facing the "wild life" so obviously even the slightest bit I open the window any small bug that lives 5cm from my room is gonna get in. So the other day I find like 5 ants coming down the wall (from the window) my mom, decided to move all the furniture from my room, literally change everything, because and I quote "There's no bugs in this house other than in your room" with a tone very much implying that my room was filthy, she's so unsirous because she's the one walking around barefoot with black feet soles and getting straight into bed, but hey, what do I know. So tonight we're about to go to sleep and she sees a trail of ants, I'm talking hundreds of those mini ants trying to get to a crumb of a lays fry, and she says "Omg! There's ants in here" and I answer "No, there's only bugs in my room" very sarcasticly, and when i tell you she looked like she wanted to puch me, im not exaggerating, so now shes pissed of(even though it felt so got to say it to ger face) so she's all like, "I gotta put your sister to sleep, take care of the ants" so here I am vacuuming ants because she decided that was the best idea, and I'm expecting that after seeing how many there are, she'll come and help me get all the dirty plates and the food from the kitchen to minimize the possibility of even more ants, wrong, she just decided to lay in bed on her phone while I was just supposed to take care if all of it.

I didn't finish it, of course, if she complains tomorrow, well as she says "I'm not the only person living in this house"