#like their ambiguous expression and general appearance...

[chiisaikobito]

kris is my favorite gender fr

[astro-rainbow777]

♊︎ Gemini Through The Houses ♊︎

🌟Gemini in the first - When gemini encompasses the first house of self and identity, this usually points to a dynamic and versatile personality that can talk up just about anyone they encounter. They leave a charming first impression and can be remembered by their quick wit, banter and something about their voice usually sticks out. The native could be well versed in foreign accents, theatrical movements, or celebrity impersonations. There are many aspects of them that express their dualistic nature in the physical expression as well; maybe they switch back and fourth between contacts and glasses - or flip flop their style often. 

📘 Gemini in the second - In the second house of finances, possessions, and values, gemini can multiple and diverse sources of income to the natives lives. It could be important for them to always have a back up plan whenever it comes to their streams of income. They could spend a lot of their mental energy thinking about their assets, financial endeavors, and stability. When their mind becomes too much for them they could enjoy indulging in activities that get them out of their head and into their body. Another manifestation is impulsive buying & spending, they can fluctuate between being extremely frugal too generous in their purchases. They could invest money into their hobbies, siblings and friends. 

👨‍🎤 Gemini in the third - Expressive and quick, these natives speak their mind freely and honestly. Because Gemini is in it’s natural ruling house, a lot of the times of the third house are taken quite literally. In the matters of mind and communication - these individuals speak without much thought. They focus on the things they’re interested in and have fun debating controversial topics while keeping things light - unless it’s with family lol. They can have a multitude of hobbies, and enjoy activities that allow them to get in touch with their inner child. They can keep long-lasting friends from their childhood, are in frequently in communication with their cousins and siblings. They make friends easily and get along easy with their neighbors.

👯‍♂️ Gemini in the fourth - These natives may come from a communicative family where emotions were approached lightly and unserious. The natives guardians could have flip flopped between logical, serious, opinionated to open, sensitive and immature. The maternal figure could have acted as the natives friend rather than nurturer and while being vocally supportive could have a tendency to b e irresponsible. The family itself could be quite dualistic and at times unpredictable. From their familial environment, the native may learn that the emotions aren’t valid or worth taking seriously. Because of these experiences, this placement may find themselves trying to pick apart their own feelings, attempting to gain a deeper understanding to them or just being genuinely confused and curious of why they are there and what they mean.

🐠 Gemini in the fifth - This placement is known for their diverse array of hobbies and mentally engaging interests. Studying could be quite fun for them, technology, or chatting with friends online, to name a few. They may have a nerdy and quirky style, liking to incorporate the media, hobbies and special interests they have into their self expression. They may like to appear ambiguous, enigmatic, and enjoy the idea of others being confused or curious of them. The native can participate in debate or like to play devils advocate. They may be attracted to others intellectual abilities, sense of humor, and mentally stimulating conversations, especially when first dating. They are known to date their friends or may prefer a friends to lovers romantic trope. 

🦕 Gemini in the sixth - Does well living with others, especially friends, however enjoys their space. They may spend quite a bit of time online, studying, learning new things, chatting with their friends, etc. They may be quite the planner, spending their days in accordance to a written routine or function well with a planner. Their health can be psychosomatic at times or they can struggle with their mental health, with a big focus on anxiety. They may benefit from learning the art of meditation and mindfulness. They may smoke because gemini rules over oral fixations, beware of health issues related to smoking.

🌼 Gemini in the seventh - These individuals aren’t known to have a romantic type and may end up dating a variety of different kinds of people throughout their lives. Commitment can be something that gives them anxiety because of the fear that comes with losing their partner. In the best case scenario their partner is their best friend or they may never move past just friends with others. They enjoy keeping their close connections light and doing the harder things alone. This natives spouse may embody the gemini traits themselves, being communicative, unserious, funny and mentally engaging. 

🎭 Gemini in the eighth - Communication may be something that this native does very little of, or is a very important lesson in their karmic cycles. They may be too curious for their own good, getting into conspiracy theories, and taboo research topics. It can be hard for Gemini in the eighth to express themselves or communicate their feelings. There may be power struggles in communication or feeling verbally cornered through out their life. Mental health struggles, obsessive thoughts, and an intense communication style can also be pertinent with gemini in the eighth.

🛰 Gemini in the ninth - Here, Gemini falls into the opposing house of its naturally ruling house, showing a lifelong student and open minded individual. Their opinions of society could be forever changing or fluid depending on who’s around. It may be hard for the individual to engage in scientific or analytic topics, and while preferring philosophy & theoretical conversations. They may struggle to move from a student role into a teaching position, because the native enjoys being the ponderer and may struggle with feelings of intellectual inferiority. They may learn about their own morality through others, an internal compass is earned for them in this life time, they may have to try on values and see what feels right for them.

🌠 Gemini in the tenth - This native may be known  as a jack of all trades, and are quite quick learners in the work place. They are great at juggling multiple projects, jobs and career paths. They may have many lines of work they get into before finding what fits them. They can make a career out of their hobbies or intellectual interests. They may find that their public persona is quite different that how they actually are in their personal lives - and may struggle with imposter syndrome to some degree. Work may demand a lot of their time and they may make a lot of friends in their career.

🔆 Gemini in the eleventh - Enjoys intellectual, funny and witty friends and social circles. They can have a diverse group of friends and be a part of many different communities. They can belong to communities that correlate to their special interests and bound over shared hobbies. They have a talent for social interaction, adaptability & engagement, drawing the attention from a variety of social groups. They a curious about humanitarian causes, and can be vocally opinionated about the injustices of the world, but may need to watch for being too heavily influenced by the media/news.

🧿 Gemini in the twelfth - With Gemini over the house of secrets, illusions, and the unseen, the native may keep their opinions/ideas to themselves & can be passive in communication. They can spend a good amount of time thinking about life beyond this lifetime. They can be emotional thinkers, may spend a lot of time daydreaming about their hobbies or special interests. This placement makes for good authors, songwriters, and poets. They may struggle with some degree of stage fright or receiving vocal attention. They can appreciate a good fantasy novel and is very comfortable with their head in the clouds.

Happiest New Moon in Gemini & Season Everyone! Let me know what you think of my post, if you relate, if you don’t relate, things that you notice about your Gemini House placement, ect.

Also, what Gemini placements do y’all have?

I am a Gemini Mercury with Gemini seventh- however my mercury falls into the sixth! Plus Gemini Saturn + North Node in the seventh :) such a fun and dualistic sign!

Farewell,

🌼 Kya 🌼

[markrosewater]

Elegance

Here’s my original article for Elegance.

 This is a topic I’ve wanted to write about for a long time.  Ironically, the words needed to explain the concept kept the column from being elegant. So I did what all artists do.  I found a way to say a lot in a little space.

 Enjoy,

 Mark Rosewater

 [NOTE: EACH OF THE ABOVE FIFTY WORDS IS HYPERLINKED.  BELOW IS THE FIFTY HYPER LINKS.  THE HEADERS SHOULDN’T BE ON THE LINKED PAGE.  I’M JUST INCLUDING THEM SO YOU KNOW WHAT EACH LINK IS.]

 ELEGANCE

 Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary has five definitions for elegance:

 • refined grace or dignified propriety

• tasteful richness of design or ornamentation

• dignified, gracefulness or restrained beauty of style

• scientific precision, neatness and simplicity

• something that is elegant

 The common elements appear to be dignity, simplicity, and taste.

 THIS

 Elegance requires thinking, but it also requires feeling.  Elegant prose is judged by how it makes the reader feel. It needs to generate a sense of calm that puts the reader at ease.  Everything in your writing should feel as if it was carefully positioned to create the proper effect.

 IS

 Pound for pound, the writer’s greatest writing tool is the verb.  Nouns add substance and adjectives add flourish, but it’s the verb that drives the sentence.  Choose a strong, descriptive verb and the sentence has flair and purpose. Choose a weak one and the sentence lacks any sense of drama.

 A

 Here’s a little game to test an elegance relevant skill (based on an old game called Inklings).  Randomly choose a noun.  Try to convey that noun to the other players using the least number of letters possible. You’ll be surprised how much you can communicate in just a few letters.

 TOPIC

 One of the greatest stumbling blocks to elegance is the inability to choose a single focus.  Elegance requires simplicity.  Simplicity requires a single purpose of thought.  This means that elegance starts before you write a single word.  A good sculptor must know his image before he picks up his chisel.

 I’VE

 One of the common misconceptions of elegance is that it requires a writer to be fancy. Elegance though is more about familiarity than formality. You shouldn’t be afraid of friendlier language such as slang or contractions, assuming that such language adds an element of ease rather than one of laziness.

 WANTED

 An important element of elegance is a sense of passion.  Brevity does not mean pulling away emotionally from words, but rather the opposite.  When you find yourself limited to fewer words, you must pack each individual word with extra emotional punch.  You are not reducing your message, simply your messenger.

 TO

 A good tool in understanding elegance is studying poetry.  Poetry is the most concise of all written art forms.  It strives to maximize impact while minimizing expression.  Each word carries the burden of evoking some essence of the poet’s message. If it cannot carry its own weight, it is excised.

WRITE

 To be an elegant writer, you have to become a student of prose.  You have to study the mechanics of language to understand how it can be shaped.  Once you have learned how to transfer the feeling in your head into meaningful words, you are on the path to elegance.

 ABOUT

 Be careful not to fall in love with ambiguity.  While intoxicating in its beauty, it is the enemy of elegance. Remember, the goal is not to make the reader struggle for comprehension.  Rather it is to lead them to the obvious conclusion. Elegance should be used to illuminate, not confuse.

 FOR

 Elegant prose requires connecting with your reader.  To do this, you have to understand who that reader is.  Nothing should come before this task.  It needs to be done before writing can begin. I like to compare this to planning a trip.  Maps are useless until you know your destination.

 A

 Another major key to elegance is the understanding of the importance of the tiniest detail.  Just as a chain is only as strong as its weakest link, a piece of prose is only as tight as its messiest detail. A good writer doesn’t stop at the nouns, verbs and adjectives.

 LONG

 Don’t confuse elegance with brevity.  Elegant things are short not because they have to be but because the difficulty to craft an elegant piece of prose combined with the limitations of time forces writers to be brief.  Elegant novels, for example, do exist, but they are few and far between.

 TIME

 To quote Roman orator (and letter writer) Marcus T. Cicero, “If I had more time, I would have written a shorter letter.”  

 Simplicity takes more time not less.  Anyone can get a point across with ten thousand words.  But a true artist can do it in ten (or possibly fifty).  

 IRONICALLY

 Irony is a potent tool for commentary.  Its genius lies in the fact that it comments not on what is, but rather on what isn’t.  Like all good humor, irony makes you laugh.  But like the best type of humor, it also makes you think.  It’s both funny and funny.

 THE

 Elegance in writing is about more than words. Equally important is how the words are woven together. Tempo, pacing, rhythm – these are the tools that set the mood for the piece.  Try reading aloud your text.  The natural beat of language is more suited for the ear than the eye.

 WORDS

 To realize the power of words, you must first understand how they work. Art is expressive; words are connotative.  That is, words draw their power from their ability to extract different ideas from different people.  A circle is a circle, but the concept of “scary” varies from person to person.

 NEEDED

 Elegance is not the result of any one attribute.  It is the combination of numerous factors coming together in harmony. This is why it’s such a hard skill to master.  Most people can pat their head or rub their tummy.  But put them together and it’s not quite so easy.

 TO

 An elegant piece of prose needs to hit the reader at a gut level.  Often they won’t know exactly why they like it, but they will recognize that something about the piece moves them.  There are many types of writing where subtlety is lost.  Elegant writing isn’t one of them.

 EXPLAIN

 There are many ways for you to explain an idea.  The most elegant one though is not through definition but by example. By connecting your idea to one already known by the reader, you’re leaving the work of teaching to someone in the past.  Education is hard.  Comparison is easy.

 THE

 If writing is like building a house, the structure is like the foundation. Its design will dictate how the house is built.  If it’s faulty, no amount of fancy brickwork will undo the damage.  So take the time to ensure your structure is building the kind of prose you want.

 CONCEPT

 Never underestimate the power of a concept.  An important part of elegance is condensing big ideas into little words. This is far from an easy task.  It often takes a genius an entire lifetime to create a truly innovative concept.  So take advantage of all their hard work and inspiration.  

 KEPT

 A common barrier to elegance is the belief that only one way will work. Often a writer is unable to abandon a beloved piece of prose even when evidence demonstrates otherwise.  If something doesn’t add to the larger sense of the piece, you have to learn to let it go.

 THE

 Readers notice things at a minute level far beyond their mind’s ability to interpret. This means that although they may not consciously notice many of your tiny details, they will do so unconsciously. Aesthetics teach us that it’s this unconscious structure that will determine whether or not it feels “right”.

 COLUMN

 All communicators, whether through speaking or print, need to find a voice. A voice provides familiarity and it teaches the listener or reader how to more quickly absorb the information. Elegance is all about the conservation of ideas.  Having a pre-learned voice to guide you is a very valuable tool.

 FROM

 I’ve spent some time talking about understanding your reader.  But there is one more person who is even more important to understand – yourself. Writing is about sharing your ideas with others.  If you haven’t spent the time to figure out what you think, how can you possibly communicate it?

 BEING

 “A picture is worth a thousand words.”

 Or so the saying goes.  What the cliché forgets to mention is how many words a single word is worth.  For example, take the word “being”. To capture the essence of what “being” represents is tens of thousands of words if not more.

 ELEGANT

 What is the value of being elegant? Why should you care? Elegance adds aesthetics. It evokes poetry.  It grants beauty.  Elegant prose draws the reader closer because it gives them something to not just learn but to admire.  Good prose stimulates the head, but elegant prose resonates in the heart.

 SO

 Who, what, where, when, how - all important questions.  But for a writer they pale next to why.  If you don’t understand the reasoning beneath the surface, the other details are irrelevant.  The act of elegance is cementing the why.  It’s taking the purpose and engraining it into the piece.

 I

 Elegance is a very personal thing.  If something doesn’t resonate with you, there’s no way for it to resonate with your reader.  Writing is an art, not a science.  There is no rulebook for how things must be done.  If your instincts are telling you that something isn’t working, listen.

 DID

 An important tool in your toolbox is time. Elegance cannot be rushed.  Mental ruts only get deeper the harder you focus on them.  Make sure to work time into your schedule so you are able to walk away from your writing. An hour next week is worth a day today.  

 WHAT

 Don’t let attention to detail pull you away from having a larger sense of what you’re writing.  Take this column as an example.  While I spent a lot of time fine tuning each entry I never lost sight of the effect they created when all the entries were put together.

 ALL

 Elegance requires taking a holistic view of writing.  Every word, every sentence, every paragraph is a piece in a larger puzzle. It’s not enough to understand the impact of a single element. You must understand how any two elements interact if you want to understand the potency of your text.

 ARTISTS

 Elegance and art are very intertwined.  Both seek to achieve a similar goal: to illuminate and inspire with a conservation of expression.  If you’re trying to be elegant, I think it helps to think of yourself as an artist. The instinct for the latter mirrors the needs of the former.

 DO

 An important part of any writing is understanding the feeling you’re trying to evoke.  And then realizing what mechanic tools you have available to evoke that feeling. Diction, verb tense, sentence length, alliteration, word flow, phonetic juxtaposition – each of these will control the mood and tone of your piece.

 I

 A writer’s life is the ultimate fodder.  Don’t be ashamed to plumb your own experiences.  You understand them deeper and more personally than anyone else.  No painter would refuse to use his finest paints. And, as a bonus, by using your own experiences, you will become better educated about yourself.

 FOUND

 Don’t forget that the act of revealing is also an act of exploration.  Don’t be afraid if you learn more than the reader you’re trying to educate.  Writing is not an exact science.  (Or even an exact art.)  Often you will find that the road to salvation has a fork.

 A

 Your future is paved with your past.  If you want to learn how to grow as a writer, you need to look back at what you’ve written. With time and a detached eye, your will find your mistakes become clearer.  Remember that it’s failure, not success, that bests drives education.

 WAY

 The problem with looking for a single solution is that you’ll never find more than one.  And the first one isn’t always the best.  But if you’re open to the possibility that every problem has an infinite number of answers, you’ll have the freedom of choosing the solution you want.  

 TO

 Sentences are filled with freeloaders.  Because writers seem to love overwriting. (I include myself in this camp.)  Make sure to create time for the editor side of you to prune unnecessary words.  If a word can be excised without any harm to the sentence, it has no right being there.

 SAY

 I’m spending my time today talking about elegance in prose, but most of what I’m saying is applicable in speech.  The key difference is that prose has less defining attributes like appearance or tone.  The key to elegant speech is making people focus on the words rather than everything else.

 A

 It’s ironic that something designed to be so simple can be so complex.  But that, my faithful readers, is the joy (and mystery) of elegance. Like an onion, elegance has numerous layers that reveal themselves as you slowly peel them away.  Oh yeah, and it can sometimes make you cry.

 LOT

 An interesting exercise is to look at each word you’re using and think about how much content is loaded in that word.  Then explore what other words exist that fulfill the same role but with added content.  Once you’ve found the word you can’t best, move onto the next word.

 IN

 A good way to get better at understanding elegance is to look for it in every day life. I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised where and how often you find it.  Study each example carefully and try to see if you can put your finger on what makes it work.  

 A

 Writing is a shared endeavor.  No one owns the words.  If someone uses a technique that works, there’s no shame in borrowing it.  Like science, writing creates technology that’s brought back to the group to spur further advancements.  Elegance is hard enough to accomplish without refusing to use the toolbox.

 LITTLE

 How big should a piece of text be if you want it to be elegant?  The answer is as big as it needs to be – and not a word more. Just think of it as playing the game Jenga. Keep pulling words out of your prose until it collapses.  

 SPACE

 One of the most important lessons in art is learning the value of negative space, the idea that the eyes are equally drawn to what isn’t there.  Prose has a very similar quality.  When writing pay careful attention to what you aren’t saying. Often it will speak the loudest volume.

 ENJOY

 For some reason people tend to equate dignity with seriousness.  And as such they come to the false conclusion that elegance has no room for humor.  Ironic as humor is one of the most elegant of styles.  A good joke is no longer than is necessary to do its job.

 MARK

 As is always true when I head off the beaten path, I am curious to hear your feedback.  What did you think of this article?  Was it entertaining?  Was it educational? Did you actually read all fifty links?  And if not, why not?

 Tell me.  Inquiring mind wants to know.

 ROSEWATER

 I couldn’t end this week’s column without my trademark closing.  I mean, how inelegant would that be?

 Join me next week when  I go from being a letter man to a Letterman.

 Until then, may you learn to appreciate now just the “what” but the “how” and “why”.

 Mark Rosewater

[hauntingrabbits]

More Batman/My Little Pony au art because these are ridiculously fun to draw. Part 3 here! Part 1 here!

More info under the cut!

1. Sweet Talk/The Harlequin (Harleen Quinzel)

Originally contracted to work as a psychiatrist for the Tartarus villain redemption program, Sweet Talk had a unique relationship with the Joker. This relationship was proven to be even stranger than her coworkers had originally assumed when she broke him out and joined him in his life of crime.

Devoting herself entirely to her new life and relationship with the joker, she covers her original cutie mark at all times. Snce her horn was snapped she can no longer cast precise spells, leaving her magic mostly emotion-based and intensely volatile, (typically manifesting in the form of sparks, zaps, and explosions).

Other Notes:

-Using Tartarus as a substitute for Arkham Asylum for this au because why not.

-The villain redemption program did NOT go well. Sorry Twilight.

-Mostly based on BTAS Harley because I adore the original costume.

-Her horn was cracked by the Joker

2. Pudding Pie/The Joker (The Joker)

Batpony’s most notorious foe. Said to have been just a regular pony until he fell into a vat at an Ace Potions factory during a conflict with Batpony.

He doesn’t have a Cutie Mark, but it’s unclear whether this was always the case or instead a result of his accident. The effects of permanent Cutie Mark loss—the only known cases of which occurred via long-banned magic and/or traumatic injury—are largely unstudied, and it’s ramifications are unknown. Some ponies theorize this may be the reason for the Joker’s mental state and general disposition.  

Sundown has a different opinion on the matter.

Other notes:

-Based mostly on BTAS joker and the ‘89 Nicholson joker.

-His name is just based on Harley’s “pudding” nickname for in in a lot of versions, but I think it would also be hilarious if he was a distant relative of Pinkie Pie.

-I could leave it ambiguous but. Yeah the potion vat didn’t actually do anything beyond slightly altering his physical appearance. He’s just like that and he never got a cutie mark in the first place.

3. Gadiel/Scarecrow (Jonathan Crane)

Raised among ponies, Gadiel was relentlessly bullied for being gangly and birdish, earning him the nickname “Scarecrow” in his youth. Though he later successfully became a professor and psychologist in Gotham, Gadiel was eventually fired when he was found to be testing his fear-inducing potions on his students and purposefully putting them through terrifying and dangerous situations. Deciding to take his experiments to the masses, Gadiel donned the mantle of Scarecrow and weaponized fear to become a career criminal.

As the Scarecrow, he’s known for his skill in manipulation, psychological torture, and crafting dangerous potions and gas. The effects of fear on magical creatures are unique and intense, much to Gadiel’s delight and interest.

Other Notes:

-I wanted to make his front half a crane but I couldn’t get the long neck to work right with the mask, so he’s more crow-like instead.

-according to the wiki 1/3 of Griffin names start with a G so naturally I was extremely tempted to name him Gonathon and you should all be very grateful I did not. The name Gadiel has origins in the bible as the name of an archangel which I thought was fitting given the insane religious trauma some versions of the scarecrow went through. I thought about trying to do something similar for this version but given that the mlp universe uses Princess Celestia as a replacement for God in expressions like “Celestia knows where” and “Oh my Celestia” I wasn’t really sure how to go about it. There’s probably some kind of sun-worshipping thing in equestria idk.

-I spent a long time on the mlp wiki but from what I could find the only “fear” magic in the show is just used by one guy and its just called “dark magic”. I thought for sure there would’ve been some random plant or magical creature they dealt with at some point that maybe did something similar I could use for his blurb but unfortunately there was not.

4. Mandible/Falseface (Basil Karlo/Matt Hagen)

Hungry and deeply resentful of the changeling queen for forcing her underlings to share what little stolen love they had with her, Mandible went rogue early on and split off from the hive to pursue his own ventures. Finding success under the name Claypose as a pony actor in Gotham, he was sustained primarily by the one-sided love of his fans for years, despite the false identity having no real prior personal relationships to leech from. 

After a magical special effects accident on set revealed his true nature, he went into hiding and immediately started crafting a new persona, but soon found in his distress and rage over losing his identity as Claypose that he could no longer sustain any disguise long enough to keep up a long-term facade. Blaming the accident, he targeted the unicorn responsible by posing as his wife to leech his love, but ended up killing the pony in a panic when his disguise failed much faster than he’d anticipated it would. Unable to keep up a new identity or return to the hive, Mandible turned to a life of crime instead, doing dirty work for the bigger criminal names in Gotham and leeching love from his employer’s targets to survive.

Other notes:

-Clayface being a changeling was an obvious pick given his power set but I really wasn’t sure how to tackle the main issue of him being unable to keep a solid form for long. I went with his distress and frustration being the main thing keeping his disguise flimsy (so he gets put in kind of an ourobouros cycle where his disguise being bad makes him upset but him being upset makes it harder to fix his disguise), but the magic accident probably also contributed somehow.

-Why are all the changelings straight up just named after body parts in this show whats that about. The “Clay” in Claypose is obviously a reference to his title/schtick in the comics while the “pose” comes from both his job as an actor and the fact that he’s posing as a pony. Mandible is the name for the jaw part of an insect.

3. Winglon/Killer Drake (Waylon Jones)

Originally intended to be used in an entrance exam, his egg was stolen from a Canterlot delivery cart on its way to Celestia’s school of magic and sold on the black market to a Pony Island circus. Raised to be part of the freak show, Winglon was pitted against circus performers and overconfident challengers in ring fights for money and entertainment. Enduring abuse and injury throughout his life from ponies that he was always fundamentally stronger than, it was only a matter of time until he snapped. Garnering the name Killer Drake for his actions, Winglon escaped into the Gotham sewer system.

Not knowing how to return to the dragonlands or whether he’d even fit into dragon society at all, he continues to lurk in the dark away from any life, deeply resenting ponies and all other manner of magical creatures that make friends with them.

Other notes:

-I like silly names ok. Winglon Jones. -I like the theory that the dragon egg used for Twilight’s entrance exam was actually fake/meant to be a no-win scenario, but I also don’t think it would be that hard for enterprising ponies to get their hands on dragon eggs. The practice probably stopped in the later seasons when they made friends with the dragonlands or whatever though.

-Given that dragons threaten to eat or kill ponies at multiple points in the show, the cannibalism is actually kind of understandable. And also not even cannibalism anymore. Still murder though.

[aphroditelovesu]

Yandere Satoru Gojo Headcanons (General)

"I will take care of you." — Satoru Gojo.

❝ ㊙ — lady l: lol, this turned out longer than I originally thought, but I love him so screw it! He has a complex personality, so it was more complicated trying to describe him as a yandere, but I did the best I could. I hope you like it and forgive me for any mistakes!! 🩵💜

❝tw: obsessive and possessive behavior, mention of stalking (mild), death and murder.

❝㊙pairing: yandere!satoru gojo x gender neutral!reader.

You probably wouldn't even realize that he was obsessed with you, that the infamous sorcerer of the Gojo Clan, was dominated by you, because he doesn't want you to know unless he wants you to. For a while, he'll be content to just watch you from afar.

Satoru is completely aware that his thoughts, his feelings are distorted, but he doesn't care, not when he was already very involved in you. You had taken over his entire life and thoughts and he wasn't bothered by it, not anymore.

At first, Satoru hated this, hated you and these thoughts that crossed his mind about you. They were ridiculous, you were ridiculous and he was even more so for thinking of you that way. After all, what was so special about you? Yes, you were attractive but it wasn't just your beauty that attracted him, there was something more. Something he didn't know how to define.

But he stopped hating you and focused on you, on his thoughts about you. Maybe they were wrong, but Gojo quickly learned to deal with them. Push them to the back of his mind and focus on his goals. And that goal, the main one at least, was you.

Satoru isn't very good at expressing how he feels about you directly, so he preferred to show his affection in a more distant way, with some gifts and letters that could seem like threats, depending on how you read them.

He is complex and acts indifferent to many and you are not the exception. He is courteous to you, but always keeps his distance, making it impossible for you to find out about his darkest thoughts. He plays with you and has fun, but always being a little obnoxious. Maybe if you looked closer, you'd notice the clenched fists and slightly pursed lips. The anguish that surrounded him when you were around.

Satoru is extremely confident in his abilities and is sure that he can win you over if he so desires. And he wants you, but he doesn't want to admit that he needs you. He doesn't like to appear weak, because he's not weak, but you make him vulnerable and he hates that.

He is apathetic towards those who are weak and if you are a person considered weak in his eyes, this will make him stressed. Not only was he attracted to you, more than that, but to a weak person? How could something like this happen? But for you, and only you, Satoru will help you become stronger, for his benefit and yours.

Satoru is possessive and will not hesitate to destroy anyone who dares to get closer to him. You are his, maybe you don't know it yet, but you belong to him. He is aggressive and will attack without remorse, prioritizing the complete destruction of the one who angered him. There will be no remorse on his face once he is done but pure satisfaction.

Ever the cunning strategist, Satoru decided it was time to act. He began to approach you in subtle ways, taking opportunities to offer hidden advice or compliments. The letters and ambiguous gifts continued to arrive, but now you began to realize that there was more behind these gestures than you initially imagined.

Little by little, Satoru broke down his own barriers and began to show a kinder, more caring side. He offered his guidance in training and missions, always masking his intentions under the appearance of a concerned mentor. You, in turn, began to notice the duality in his personality: the cold, distant professor and the man who, somehow, seemed genuinely interested in you.

But he acted more playfully with you, loosening up in a way, disguising his feelings in any way he could.

Gojo spoils you deeply, he has a lot of money and wouldn't mind spending it on you. But he has rules and will be stingy if you disobey him and will probably punish you with deprivation.

He is cold and doesn't mind sacrificing those for what he believes in and he will sacrifice anyone for you. Satoru will have no qualms about killing anyone he believes to be a potential threat to his ideals. Blood-stained hands won't make any difference to him.

Satoru Gojo is complex and difficult to understand, but his obsession with you makes him even more complicated. His feelings are masked and will only be shown if he wants to and once he has you to himself, there is no way he will let you out.

[radioactive-earthshine]

Legionnaires #77 & #61

Random Jenni Ognats facts to give her more depth in your fics.

Every Flash fan loves Jenni, but regrettably I have found very few people have actually read the comics which she is from and spends most of her development in, and as such most of her characterization and character fundamentals comes from her appearances in Impulse, Young Justice (1998) or The Flash (1987). While people do get her 'cinnamon roll' personality correct, as she is lover above everything, there is a lot people miss out on that is important to her character and your creativity/understanding of her. She is much more than just Bart Allen's favorite cousin.

So here are some "lesser known" facts about Jenni that may assist you in how you approach her in transformative works, or just on your perception of her as The Lonely Speedster.

The Basics

1.) She is older than Bart - According to the The Flash: Secret Files & Origins #1 published in 1997 she is supposed to be 2 years older than Bart. Other sources are rather ambiguous when it comes to her age in relation to Bart, and some lead you to believe that she may be the same age (or younger) but in reading her comics and order of events her being 2 years older fits the narrative more.

The Flash: Secret Files & Origins #1 (1997)

2.) She was born without speed, and only got her powers through a trauma response and (possible) experimentation** at the hands of The Dominators. This is generally known and is not a lesser known fact per-se, but the situation surrounding her powerlessness is generally not understood fully.

Legion of Super-Heroes (1989) Annual 5

The Dominators at this time for Jenni really are the biggest boogeyman to Speedsters as they were (to her knowledge) the reason why her mother and uncle died, they had kidnapped Bart when he was an infant and experimented on him which may have been why he was rapidly aging in the first place, and now they have come back for her again. Jeven fled Earth to Arrok specifically to flee Earthgov, President Thawne, the U.P. and the Dominators who had an express interest in speedsters - so when they caught up to her this situation had to have been nothing short of terrifying.

In the end, after resigning herself that she was going to die there, she gains access to her speed in order to save her father who is the only known blood family she even connects with 30th century.

From then on she spent time with scientists on Arrok to control her speed until she was drafted to serve in the Legionnaires.

** we don't know if whatever tests the Dominators performed on her contributed to her eventual gaining speed powers.

3.) We're not sure how Jeven found out about Bart and Iris evacuated to the past, but she knew they were there. All her knowledge of the Flash Family comes directly from her father as it is unlikely she spent any time with her great-grandparents who were alive at least when she was 4.

4.) Likely because of Jeven fleeing governments to keep Jenni safe, Jenni has an acute understanding of interstellar political boundaries.

Legion of Super-Heroes (1989) Annual #6

5.) She is a great pilot and has knowledge of interstellar communication - how she learned how to fly or to recognize various means of communication is unknown.

Legionnaires #39

Legion of Super-Heroes (1989) #106

6.) She almost draft-dodged being a Legionnaire because she was too afraid of what may happen - death is her family legacy and she knows, possibly better than all of them, how perilous they all are and how dangerous doing the types of things they are doing are. As a result of this, she very nearly fled which likely would have resulted in her being on the run - which is ironic considering Jeven was on the run with her when she was a small child. She likely knew very well what running would entail and it was worth it to her at the time.

Legion of Super-Heroes (1989) #62

Legionnaires #19

7.) Scaredy Cat to Guerrilla Solider. When Jenni first begins her journey as XS she is absolutely terrified of what may happen and is easily frightened even by innocuous things- but as the story progresses she becomes a fierce Legionnaire that fights against tyranny over and over again - most notably spending nearly a whole year on Xanthu undertaking guerrilla war tactics against assailing Robotica.

Legion Worlds #4

8.) Lori Morning, the little sister figure. When Jenni travels to the 1990s she meets 10 year old Lori Morning who is slingshot through time to the 30th century as a long-term character. Jenni feels extremely close to Lori as a big sister and is frequently protective of her.

Legionnaires #62

9.) Many crushes. Jenni has had many crushes during her run, the most notable one being Rokk (which the writers were considering making a canon couple but dropped).

Legion of Super-Heroes (1989) ##75 Rokk was her first known major crush and love interest and he was her biggest inspiration to stay as a Legionnaire when she considered leaving (see point #6). Because she believed in him, because he believed in her, she was able to use him as inspiration and a weapon against her anxiety. As the series progressed her affection for him deepened and thanks to The Emerald Eye she got her wish for a kiss from him, but because it was all fake it was the starting point for her to let him go and move on.

Legionnaires #44

Mon El "M'onel" was her second biggest crush which she admired from a distance. Mon El was always friendly with her and enjoyed her company, but nothing ever developed beyond them just being friends.

Legionnaires #43

Dyrk Magz was her third and final main crush, but at first it was one-sided from Dyrk to her. Dyrk was a Legionnaire with the code name Magno, however he lost his powers and instead of being retired from duty he instead took up a position as the Monitor Officer in the Outpost. At first, Jenni does not even notice that Dyrk is into her as she rants to him about other boys and awkwardly pushes him away inadvertently. Despite this, and we don't see the development, they do grow closer as Jenni and Dyrk are seen embracing every now and then and even go on a small date. Unfortunately, after the Time Rift incident which closes the main series' titles we can assume they 'broke up' as Dyrk is written out of the story entirely to live on his home planet Braal as a Science Police Officer.

Legionnaires #77

Honorable Mention: Kyle Rayner. This is more of an infatuation stemming from stories she was told about Barry and Hal being close, and Jay and Alan being close. Because she was a speedster, and he was a Green Lantern she let herself become enthralled with him due to tradition and 'destiny'. Naturally, it didn't last and Kyle was not about it.

Green Lantern (1990) #98

10.) Fast rides and thrills don't do it for her. She prefers slower rides and attractions mostly because going fast is her 'job' and she has the added history of spending most of her life as a normal girl who grew to appreciate slower things.

Legionnaires #77

11.) Time Trapper's meddling. It is never revealed but a Time Trapper (this character changes and morphs) once had a hidden plot that involved her and a cosmic destiny she was to fulfill.

Legionnaires Annual #3

12.) Legion is her family. Despite multiple invites to live in the M2 era with Bart and company - she has rejected this in favor of staying with her team and her father. The only exception to this is at the end of Final Crisis: Legion of Three Worlds when she decides to break from her team "The Wanderers" to live in Earth Prime because Geoff, king of Retcons, decided to change everything about Jenni's place of birth and powers origin.

Legionnaires #37

13.) She learned how to play the saxophone in the 20th century with Bart, and she continued to play it even in the 31st century.

Impulse (1995) #12

14.) Red lips - makeup or permanent stain? We're not sure but there are very few instances after she becomes a Legionnaire where she is not without those iconic red red lips.

Now you know her a little better. Go forth.

Legionnaires #39

[bairdthereader]

Intentional Touch, Respected Space: A By-Episode Study, Part 3

This is the space where their loves grows in safety.

S1E3: Kiss

[Note: Approx. 4K words here, so grab a snack first!]

Nick has been dealing with and processing quite a lot of newly acknowledged feelings in the days leading up to the events of episode 3. (See @stopper-my-heart’s excellent post analyzing Nick’s internet research.) When Harry asks how’s it, Nick’s “fine” is followed up with a totally untrue “everything’s normal," as he tries to push back the confusion he's feeling. After Harry invites Nick to his party, Nick has some interactions where his internal turmoil starts to affect his responses to the people around him: Imogen's thinly disguised effort to wrangle Nick into a date and the locker room teasing about Imogen and Tara. These are some of the places where we clearly see Nick beginning to struggle with the divide that's appearing between his previous self and the deeply buried truths he’s starting to recognize, saying things he doesn't quite mean and sliding back into the persona he's always held up with his friend group.

So, it’s a ways into this episode before Nick and Charlie are able to have a real conversation, and Nick takes the opportunity to ask Charlie to Harry’s party. Nick’s previous conversations about the party resulted in impulsive, pressured, or protectively ambiguous responses ("Yeah, sounds good," to Harry; "Fine, I guess I can invite you" to Imogen; "Yeah, maybe," to the rugby lads re: Tara), but this is a determined, intentional Nick. [I won’t belabor the point here, but see my previous post about this scene and Nick’s intentions if you’d enjoy more detail.] Suffice it to say that the space between Nick and Charlie has gotten visibly a bit smaller and emotionally very much smaller. Nick keeps his arms crossed during this conversation, but loosely, and he’s leaning forward. There’s some self-soothing and protection here as Nick bravely pushes forward and asks Charlie to go to Harry’s party, but at the end of the exchange Nick is still leaning toward Charlie, looking at him in a similar way as he did on the couch while considering holding Charlie's hand, but with more happiness.

On the flip side, Charlie’s hesitancy in saying yes to the party is obviously due to the fact that Harry’s party definitely is not his kind of thing, but also, I think we can assume, due to the locker room conversation referenced above where Nick (from Charlie’s perspective) has just contradicted all the signals he sent Charlie during the hug at his house. Charlie can’t imagine enjoying a party where Nick has his “chance with Tara.” But then Nick says “I want you to be there” and Charlie takes a moment to really look at Nick’s face, which is, it must be said, pretty close to his own in this moment. Charlie’s expression runs the gamut in just a second (Joe, you genius). There is the briefest moment when he looks like he might decline again, then a moment when his gaze roves around Nick’s face, and then Charlie clearly changes his mind. Something he sees reassures him that Nick means what he says, and so Charlie says “okay.”

On the night of the party, we see that Nick has been spending time with the rugby lads and other people from his friend group, enjoying himself generally, but not fully present. Imogen makes a grabby appearance, demands a hug and a compliment on her dress. Nick turns away almost immediately, looking for Charlie, whom, he’s beginning to realize on some level, he’s more comfortable with than any of these people. Charlie, on the other hand, is essentially entering what must feel to him and his PTSD like a gladiator’s ring. He’s surrounded by either strangers, bullies, or people he knows only superficially, with chaotic sound and strobing lights. He needs a grounding force and comfort.

So when they see each other, cross the room and enter their shared space, there’s clear relief and gladness, a mutual clicking into place.

Nick, likely recalling the hug at Charlie’s house, approaches Charlie with arms raised, possibly wishing to repeat that gesture of honest affection. So perhaps the original intent was a hug, perhaps not, but either way Nick remembers the public setting and that Charlie has not been privy to the progression of Nick’s thoughts around touch between them and so wouldn’t understand the motivation behind the hug. He settles instead for a two-shoulder grasp, continuing to respect the space between them—both the physical space required by the public setting and Nick’s concern about Charlie’s potentially negative feelings toward touch in general, and the emotional space required by the fact that they are both still unsure of what any touch beyond the purely platonic might mean. And here that space is literally brightly illuminated.

Meanwhile Charlie, a veteran of hiding in plain sight, with reactions and instincts hammered into place by physical, social, and emotional abuse, keeps his hands down by his sides. He stops approaching Nick just a split second sooner than Nick stops approaching him. His primary thought here has to be protecting Nick (and himself, but mostly Nick) from the potential speculation of the people around them, followed by continued uncertainty about what Nick’s touch actually means (see: long hug followed by locker room talk), and finally trying to keep himself from falling even harder for a likely (in Charlie’s view) unavailable Nick. Despite all this internal conflict, Charlie is clearly ecstatic to see Nick and doesn’t try to shrug off this very deliberate and affectionate touch. Nick’s hands start out tight, then loosen just a bit before reluctantly sliding off Charlie’s arms. They spend a long moment just smiling blissfully at each other while the light continues to shine between them. It’s right there on their faces, but there’s still too much uncertainty for either of them to fully recognize it.

The camera pulls away to show us Nick and Charlie in the center of the melee, with a still and peaceful space between them and bright light illuminating them. They’ve created safety and calm for each other, no matter what is going on around them.

Next we find Nick and Charlie couching it up in a random hallway discussing, once again, Mario Kart. As on the couch at Charlie’s house, Charlie is squarely in the middle of his half of the couch, a few pillows on one side, while Nick is closer to Charlie’s side of the couch (after all, he's left enough room for Harry to sit down on his other side, unfortunately). His arm is crossed across his chest in a self-soothing and containing gesture, trying to be as close as possible while still maintaining that little bit of space. Charlie actually seems less nervous, leaned back into the couch and loosely holding on to his drink while his face is turned to Nick. He’s thoroughly enjoying Nick’s company and closeness without too much worry.

When Harry approaches, Nick’s face conveys irritation and reluctance, while Charlie immediately starts scanning the group for potential danger, face closed off but eyes alert. When Harry sits down, Nick’s arm lowers next to Charlie, possibly to offer subtle comfort while someone so antagonistic toward Charlie is so physically close to him, possibly to prepare to stand up and get away from Harry if he gets too obnoxious. Either way, Nick is eliminating that space and allowing touch to happen for a caring reason; respect is still there.

The next few scenes are filled to the brim with nonconsensual, uncomfortable, or disrespectful touch.

Nick is clearly annoyed by, if not outright uncomfortable with, Harry’s yoking him and dragging him bodily away from Charlie and toward Tara. Harry’s always been a grabby guy and Nick usually puts up with it good-naturedly, but this is too aggressive even for Nick. He could fight back, of course, and push Harry away, but not without causing a bit of a scene; he looks almost ill by the time he’s finally in front of Tara.

Ben and Charlie collide fairly forcefully in yet another weird, random hallway, this one ominously dark. Ben starts with a disingenuous apology while Charlie backs into a literal corner, clearly signaling that he does not want Ben anywhere near him, much less any kind of touch. He even starts to walk away. But this is Ben, so of course he does the thing he knows will bother Charlie most in that moment and grabs Charlie’s arm. Ben regularly ignores, disrespects, and obliterates the space Charlie puts around himself, but this time, Charlie pushes back, literally and figuratively. While his strength here does him credit and takes him another step toward freedom from Ben, the fact remains that Charlie just experienced a very unpleasant, disrespectful, nonconsensual touch.

Imogen, though less negatively intentioned than Harry and Ben, also subjects Nick to touch he clearly does not want. He’s visibly uncomfortable—not nervous, not shy—but unwilling and reluctant. He tries to disengage kindly ("I can’t dance"; "I need to find a friend.) because he doesn’t want to hurt Imogen’s feelings, but she doesn’t take the hint. Or, if she does, she responds by grabbing even tighter, resulting in this massively distressing moment for Nick. [You have to wonder if Nick feels like his own neck even belongs to him after this party.]

Then, thank goodness, Nick gets to witness consensual, joyful touch between Tara and Darcy. Tara’s nod before their kiss is clear in the shot; obviously they’ve both agreed to this moment, and that agreement is what lends freedom and joy to their public affection. Not only are they bravely declaring their feelings in this intensely crowded setting, but they’re doing it with mutual, reciprocated care and respect for their individual feelings.  

So we now have a Nick who has Been. Though. Some. Things. in a very short space of time finally finding his best friend, his person, and settling in—close—to a Charlie who has also Been. Through. Some. Things. and wants nothing more than to be with his best friend again too. The space between them at this point is negligible. Nick once again leaves a good bit of room on his side of the couch in favor of being close to Charlie, their knees are touching, they’re turned in to each other, and neither of them are pulling away or displaying the need for a buffer against judgmental gazes as they did earlier in the evening. They both want comfort, and they want it from the person who they know has a caring understanding of them.

It’s in this safe, mutually (if silently) agreed upon closeness (read: lack of space) that Charlie tells Nick the truth, or at least part of the truth, about how Nick’s friends make him feel; Nick is clearly upset by this, not on his friends’ behalf but on Charlie’s. Nick returns Charlie’s honesty and validates Charlie’s feeling when he admits, out loud for the first time, that he doesn’t like his friends very much and says that he’d rather be with Charlie. This is Nick telling Charlie “I choose you” in a concrete way, even if he doesn’t mean it in a fully romantic way just yet. There’s an expression of hope, almost of expectation, on his face after he says it, hope that Charlie will understand. Charlie, being Charlie, doesn’t seem to entirely believe the depth of meaning behind Nick’s words, and changes the subject to his confrontation with Ben.

If Nick was ever going to cross not only the intentional touch divide but also the platonic-to-more-than-platonic touch divide in a public place, this moment of worry and protectiveness over Charlie facing off with Ben would be it. Nick clearly considers taking Charlie’s hand while Charlie is explaining what happened, but he doesn’t, and refocuses on Charlie’s face and words. Then, when the story is done, there’s a second of hesitation on Nick’s part as he glances at Charlie’s hand a couple of times—he’s extremely aware, especially after the sparkly hand hovering on Charlie’s couch, that this touch means more to him now than just a show of solidarity—but the hesitation is quickly overcome, and Nick commits to his intention. He is genuinely proud of Charlie, vastly relieved that the Ben situation wasn’t worse, perhaps a bit guilty that he wasn’t there to intervene this time, and wants a grounding touch to reassure himself Charlie is okay. Holding Charlie’s hand now is just as much about being his friend—his real, closest friend—as it is about romantic feeling or physical chemistry.

Charlie’s intense gulp, on the other hand, shows us that he really wants this to mean more. He stares down at their hands like he’s having an out of body experience (and for him, after the treatment he received from Ben, this considered and caring touch probably does feel that way). Notably, he does not pull away at all. Charlie has always been intensely aware of how any physical contact between himself and Nick would be perceived, both by Nick himself and by the people around them. The fact that Nick initiated this contact, likely combined with the lingering memory of the doorway hug and Tori’s speculation that Nick is not straight, plus Charlie’s hope outweighing his self-preservation instincts, keeps Charlie happily in what I’ll call the zero-space zone. Nick suggests finding somewhere quieter to hang out, and Charlie, looking again like he can’t believe it, agrees.

Nick keeps hold of Charlie’s hand, pulling him off the couch. This is in direct contrast to the way Harry pulled Nick off the couch earlier; Nick was verbally protesting and physically pulling back a bit, yet Harry still forced the issue, but here, Nick asks and receives Charlie’s agreement before he does anything to move Charlie. Charlie’s surprise increases as Nick maintains the hand hold even when they exit the pseudo-private bubble of the couch and move into the crowd. The zero-space zone is out in the open now. But this is Nick on a mission, fully realizing that he doesn’t want to be part of the melee anymore, that being with Charlie is what he wants; he’s unwilling to let Charlie go, partly because he just doesn’t want to, and partly so they won't be separated again. Nick proposes a race—all the quicker to get away—and lots of flirty running ensues.

Nick sits to catch his breath and Charlie, after a slight hesitation—whether from not being sure, even after the last few minutes, that Nick actually wants Charlie near him, or just to center himself a bit—joins him, but leaves more space than they had had between them on the couch. He needs that bit of space to prepare himself, to feel clear and steadied, for the conversation ahead. Because being truly alone with Nick for the first time in what have been some very confusing days for Charlie makes him simultaneously brave (he has to ask about Tara and get the answer from Nick, rather than secondhand) and frightened (he doesn’t really want to have his worst fears confirmed). He knows he has to get the question out, because not knowing is causing him pain. Again, the physical space between them represents emotional space for Charlie to maneuver.

Nick’s hand is on the floor during this entire conversation, but Charlie keeps his on his knees, possibly to resist temptation, possibly to preemptively protect himself from what he thinks will be more hurt. When he asks about Tara, Nick bodily turns toward Charlie, rushing to emphatically to deny any kind of attraction to her, seeming surprised that Charlie would even ask. Charlie takes a minute to reorient his thoughts around this new, or at least clarified, information, while Nick takes a second to acknowledge why Charlie’s question bothered him so much—both of them navigating their feelings in that shared, respectful space.

Charlie’s next question—so you don’t have a crush on anyone at the moment?—is even more personal (and takes even more bravery for Charlie), but could still possibly be construed as just friendly interest in Nick’s romantic life. It’s a fine line, but Charlie is both asking Nick a forthright question and giving him a little room to get out of answering it in any meaningful way if he’s uncomfortable. But that’s not Nick’s way, so of course he does answer, even if his uncertainty and fear keep him from naming his crush. “Well… I didn’t say that,” and “You’re just going to assume they’re a she.”

Nick is being brave too—each answer he gives is as honest as he can manage in the moment, and followed by a look of intense fear combined with an almost desperate desire for Charlie to read between the lines so Nick doesn’t have to name the thing that is scaring him so much . . . but he’s still answering. Charlie is so strong in this sequence, confronting his own fears, taking care of his own emotional needs, processing each monumental revelation from his best friend, while simultaneously guiding Nick gently through speaking out loud for the first time many of the conflicting emotions that have been wreaking havoc with his life. The emotional intuition and sustained nerve required to do this is frankly astounding.

Charlie asks, “Would you go out with someone who wasn’t a girl?” and even now this could just barely, the tiniest bit, be considered a question asked out of curiosity rather than from a point of personal attraction (after all, just because Charlie’s gay doesn’t mean he’s automatically attracted to Nick). But when Nick offers up the first “maybe,” you see Charlie visibly react. There’s just the slightest pull back of his shoulders as his eyes rove quickly around Nick’s face, assessing both Nick’s statement and his feelings while saying it. Charlie thinks for a moment, then starts to narrow that nurtured space between them. He does it carefully, moving one foot closer to Nick’s and placing his hand on the floor next to, but not touching, Nick’s. This is Charlie acting on his wishes while still giving Nick the room he needs, the time he needs, to think about what comes next, without any pressure or obligation.

Charlie’s next question—“would you kiss someone who wasn’t a girl?”—takes their conversation firmly out of the realm of friendly speculation and into that of romantic interest. It’s clear now what he’s getting at. He watches Nick’s reaction very carefully, probably on some level for signs of disgust because Charlie’s brain is always working against him, but mostly he registers Nick’s fearful excitement. He’s checking in on Nick every single second of this conversation. What Charlie sees propels him to carefully but very intentionally close that space and instigate romantic touch for the first time, understanding that it’s safe for both him and Nick to do so. Still, he keeps the touch absolutely minimal, continuing to watch Nick’s facial expressions, with the utmost care for Nick’s fraught emotions and respect for his right to pull away.

He doesn’t.

And we have Charlie the lionheart, putting it all on the line with one, final question. “Would you kiss me?” The physical space between them has narrowed, their shoulders closer together and pinky fingers touching, and the emotional distance has narrowed as well. Despite the way they both feel like they’re standing on the edge of a cliff, they’re reaching a clearer understanding of each other than they’ve yet had. Nick knows now that Charlie definitely feels attracted to him, and Charlie can see that there’s a chance that at least some of his feelings are reciprocated. There’s no going back from this moment for them, for their friendship, and both boys know it. But they’ve built this space of trust between them, so here they can both be brave. Nick gathers the courage he needs to return Charlie’s touch and twine their fingers together.

Charlie once again looks steadfastly at Nick’s face as he gives an almost imperceptible nod then pushes through his nerves to get out his answering “yeah” (accompanied by a very brief, very Nick Nelson-style frown of determination). Charlie waits . . . and waits, still making sure Nick is okay, before finally leaning in. And even when he does, his eyes stay open, locked on Nick’s eyes, not his lips, still watching even in this charged moment for any sign of discomfort or unwillingness on Nick’s part. It’s only when Nick’s own eyes close that Charlie allows his gaze to relax too. He can be sure, for the moment, that this massively important, life-changing touch, this kiss, is something Nick wants and that it is occurring within their shared space of safety.

They pull back, reinstating some physical space and trying to regain a bit of equilibrium. Charlie sees the panic-adjacent expression on Nick’s face and fears that maybe this went too far, while at the same time still feeling shocked that it happened at all, a bit dazed and overwhelmed. Nick uses this space between them to check in with himself, to make sure that what he felt was true, that he understands himself in this moment, and to decide what he wants to do next. While they figure these things out individually, their hands are still connected, grounding and reassuring—either of them could pull away completely, but they don’t. When Nick looks back over at Charlie, a magical little bit of rainbow reflected on his face, his expression conveys some surprise, some lingering fear and confusion, but also hope. Hope that Charlie is still with him in their shared space, hope that their friendship is still intact, hope that Charlie feels as strongly about this new thing between them, whatever shape it takes, as he does. Charlie looks back at him with trepidation, worry that Nick is going to pull away or put up walls or push Charlie away, but there’s also tentative hope in him as well. He doesn’t act on it, though—he’s still respecting the fact that this is completely uncharted territory for Nick.

But then Nick makes a completely unprompted, voluntary choice and takes Charlie’s hand with obvious intention (and a comforting thumb swipe). Now there is absolutely no room for misunderstanding or dismissing the gesture as anything other than what it is; Nick is giving truth to Charlie’s hopes and easing some of his fears with this touch.

They have once again established that they are still in the same space, still honoring each other’s fears and hopes and respecting each other’s desires. So from that place of assurance, Charlie leans into Nick again. Again, Charlie keeps his eyes on Nick’s for the entire time he’s closing the distance between them (he barely moves until he sees Nick look down at his mouth), doesn’t raise his hand to Nick’s neck until Nick’s desire for touch is clear, and again he doesn’t let his own eyes close until Nick’s do. Charlie’s hand on Nick’s neck is firm, but not restrictive, grounding and affectionate, but not pressuring. Charlie’s extreme and nuanced care for Nick is the exact opposite of how he himself has been treated in the past; he is making absolutely sure that there is nothing he’s doing that might hurt Nick, even in this moment that is just as charged and monumental for him as it is for Nick.

This kiss is much less tentative for both of them, a much clearer expression of their feelings and desires, as Nick also firmly but carefully grips Charlie’s shoulder and pulls him a bit closer, and Charlie hangs on to Nick’s shirt with his other hand. As soon as the kiss ends, they’re studying each other (and of course thinking about more kissing). Nick’s hand on Charlie’s shoulder loosens a bit and Charlie’s hand moves away from Nick’s neck to his shirt collar, giving each other just the tiniest bit of breathing room, but they both still want closeness as they acknowledge what just happened. Charlie sees Nick repeatedly glance back down at his mouth, something that gives him enough confidence for a small smile as he asks Nick if he’s alright. We’ll probably never know what Nick would have said here—there’s a good chance Nick himself didn’t know—but there is just the barest hint of a returning smile hovering at the corner of his mouth.

Until Harry. Harry’s voice reminding them that they aren’t truly alone, reminding Nick of all the ramifications of his attraction to Charlie, reminding Charlie that this is far from settled between them.

And suddenly that space between them that was safe and solid and contained is a yawning chasm.

For now.

[perpetual-stories]

Six Ways To End Your Story

Hi, everyone! Someone kindly asked for advice on how to end a story so here it is for everyone!

Six Types of Story Endings

While every story has to end its own way, there are six general types of ending. Which one you go for will depend, of course, on the story you’re telling, and maybe also on the tropes or conventions of the genre you’re working within (if you’re working within a genre at all).

The six types of story endings include:

Resolved ending

Unresolved ending

Expanded ending

Unexpected ending

Ambiguous ending

Tied ending

What Is a Resolved Ending?

A resolved ending leaves the reader with no lingering questions or loose ends A resolved ending is part of most classic fairy tales (“And they all lived happily ever after…”), but also of countless classic novels.

Consider the ending of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, a classic of literary fiction and the inspiration for countless romance novels. At the end of the book, Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy marry, and we’re led to believe that their marriage will be long and happy. Not only that, but the rest of Mr. Bennet’s marriageable daughters have settled down in matches appropriate to their characters. In other words, there are no lingering questions or tensions.

Remember, a resolved ending isn’t necessarily a happy ending. Think of any of Shakespeare’s tragedies, in which the protagonist and most of the other major characters usually wind up stabbed, poisoned, or executed.

What matters most in a resolved ending is that all of the threads of the novel have been clearly and satisfying resolved.

What Is an Unresolved Ending?

Sometimes, the end is not really the end. That’s the case with an unresolved ending. This is the kind of ending that leaves the reader with more questions than answers. Ending on a cliffhanger has the potential to be a frustrating experience, but that frustration can also be satisfying if the story calls for it.

Unresolved endings are popular choices for books in a series, because it leads the reader to the next book.

What Is an Expanded Ending?

An expanded ending often takes the form of an epilogue. As the name implies, it expands the world of the story beyond the events of the narrative itself. That usually involves a jump forward in time, and occasionally a change in perspective as well. (Dostoevsky’s classic Crime and Punishment ends on just such a note, as does Tolstoy’s War and Peace.) Like an unexpected ending, an expanded ending may reframe the way the reader has been thinking about the story.

One advantage of an epilogue is that it allows the writer to answer questions that might not be possible to answer in the space of the main narrative (for instance, how things turned out a decade or more after the main events of the story).

What Is an Unexpected Ending?

An unexpected ending is one the reader likely didn’t see coming. The twist ending can be earth-shattering, or clever and subtle. The trick to pulling off a great surprise is that it should seem inevitable in hindsight. Very few readers are likely to be on board for an ending that seems to truly come from nowhere, but if the ending makes sense they’re more likely to appreciate the subtle machinations and plot twists it took to get there.

A good ending avoids deus ex machina, a Latin expression meaning “god from a machine.” In the context of fiction, a deus ex machina is a heavy-handed device that abruptly and definitively resolves all the story’s problems in a way that doesn’t feel natural to the story.

For instance, a previously unknown rich uncle appearing from nowhere to give the poor striving protagonist a vast fortune may certainly be a surprise, but it’s not likely to satisfy your readers. Remember, a good twist is one that the writer has left clues for all along.

What Is an Ambiguous Ending?

An ambiguous ending is one that’s open to interpretation. While an unresolved ending doesn’t give the reader enough information to say what’s going to happen next, and an ambiguous ending might allow two different readers to come to two completely different conclusions. Of all the endings, the ambiguous one demands the most involvement from the reader, since they are actively invited to think about the significance of events for themselves.

Take a quick look at the ending to Charles Dickens’ classic Great Expectations. In the last lines of the novel, the main character Pip takes the hand of the widow Estrella and says he sees “no shadow of another parting from her.” But is Pip’s vision reliable? Do they stay together or is another parting in the future? The novel leaves the reader with both tantalizing possibilities.

What Is a Tied Ending?

A tied ending is on that brings the story full circle—it ends where it begins. This type of ending follows the classic Hero’s Journey, which is common to many myths and folktales from around the world, but it’s also a popular choice for many works of literary fiction trying to capture the cyclical nature of time. James Joyce’s famously beguiling Finnegan’s Wake even ends on a sentence fragment that literally completes the very first sentence of the novel.

As a writer, you’ll need to make sure that the journey to this point felt worthwhile. Ending up right where you started can feel pointless if the journey there and back wasn’t meaningful.

There you have it folks, and kind ask, I hope this helps anyone who is struggling with their story endings!

Follow, reblog and comment if you find these helpful!

[sastrology]

the rising and you

(part 1/3)

ARIES RISING: FOREST FIRE

pictured: (Rihanna and Stevie Nicks, Aries Rising)

Individuals born with an Aries rising stand out of a crowd. They typically have exuberant personalities and an easy time drawing friends. They're likely to be quite opinionated and are not the type to keep beating around the bush or react well to passive-aggressive behavior. They love anything that is new and fresh. These individuals are known for being quite go-getters who will not settle. They can be very blunt and to the point which can irritate the softer rising signs, but they prefer to let people know where they stand and hate beating around the bush.

With a Cancer 4th house (if sign interceptions are not present) they can have a strong bond with the family and feel as though they are the family's protector which can make them act out impulsively if they ever feel threatened. Even if they are the youngest sibling, they often become a sort of mother figure to the rest.

Build wise they will appear more masculine, and athletic even if they don’t work out. They really pop in sportswear regardless of build. Red and black colors are flattering and make their features pop. Pointed chins that form into a well-defined square jaw with thick and defined eyebrows. Being the first sign of the zodiac they can also appear quite younger than they are. They may also have a lot of scars or bruises on the face and body.

TAURUS RISING: ROCKS AT A SEA SHORE

pictured: (Fred Rogers and Vivien Leigh, Taurus Rising)

Individuals with a Taurus Rising exude a calm, stable energy that a lot of people crave. They're stubborn, generous individuals who can be very pleasing and practical to speak with. They really enjoy luxury and beauty items and take a lot of time for self-care. They are the types to not really want to involve themselves in drama as they can think of 100 other things they'd rather be doing. They’re never going to say everything you want to hear, they will say what you need to hear. They are strong individuals who can bare the weight of the waves that can crash down on them.

With Leo in the 4th house (if sign interceptions are not at play) it shows they needed a lot of love growing up. Whether that was met or not is ambiguous, but Taurus Rising individuals are either made strong or born strong. They may have great pride for the home and enjoy throwing family get-togethers and cookouts and do it tastefully.

Facial features tend to be very symmetrical with naturally curly hair. They’re built with a well-formed body, average-to-short statures, larger arms, and a strong neck. Thick, curly hair is more likely. Thanks to the Venusian influence, these risings can have softened almost refined features. As to be expected, these risings look great in greens and burnt umbers. They typically care quite a bit about what they look like, so beauty can be a focus.

GEMINI RISING: KALEIDOSCOPE

pictured: (Amy Winehouse and Drew Barrymore, Gemini Rising)

Gemini Rising individuals are bright, vivacious, and expressive individuals. You can usually spot them pretty easily since they love to talk and communicate and use a lot of hand movements. They have keen observation skills and the ability to read people quickly. They are very light-hearted, yet impulsive individuals, who love to give their opinion on anything. They are very strong communicators with a lot of charm. They're very changeable in nature and can change their minds often as they are constantly seeing the world from a new angle due to their curious mind that never stops working.

With Virgo in the 4th house (if sign interceptions are not present) we see organized individuals who strive to help their loved ones improve. They will provide a lot of acts of service to the family and constantly strive for more ways to better assist them. If something goes wrong in the house or family, they can become bogged down on the tiny details and become frustrated. They are very good at organizing as they are able to see all of the little details to help make something perfect.

The eyes are clear and sparkle, especially when they get to talk about something they're passionate about. Broad foreheads and they may appear younger than they are. They typically have slim builds and average to tall heights. The limbs in general are quite long, including the fingers, legs, and neck. VERY expressive facial expressions.

CANCER RISING: SPRING RAIN

pictured: (Selena Gomez and Farrah Fawcett, Cancer Rising)

Individuals with a Cancer ascendant are remembered for heartfelt talks at 3 am, intuitive nature, and innocence they project.

With Libra in the 4th house (if sign interceptions are not present) they will be known for having an aesthetically pleasing house. They may be a bit messy, but it carries a certain charm to it. Venusian in nature, they may make great designers and have a knack for interior designing.

With the parents they may measure a lot of their worth on the approval they get from them. They could have a low tolerance for arguments in the household and have mastered the role of peace keepers.

As with most rising signs, the eyes can be round buckets of depth. People with a Cancer rising typically have rounded features. The hair and skin can be very luminous and carry a healthy glow and plump to it. They pull off silvers, charcoals, and greys like they just walked off a 1940s film set. Women with this rising typically develop femininely quite young and carry a fuller figure.

as always, I am not an astrologer. This is based on my astrology books and online research over the years. This is a very basic assessment of the rising sign, as a LOT of other factors can influence a person's personality.

[bambimeadows]

MW men leaving you to go away on a mission

A/n: my first time writing for modern warfare in general, I hope you like it 😔 Nervous

Consists of Gaz, Graves, Price, soap, ghost, alejandro and Rudy

Mostly pure fluff, but angst for Ghost and Graves, because in my mind they’d be problematic boyfriends/husbands

Warning: swearing, suggestive themes but no explicit smut, gender neutral reader (if there are errors that indicate other wise I apologise but I tried my best to make reader as ambiguous as possible) I haven’t proof read as best I could, if I fixate on making it perfect I will never post the silly little thing.

Requests are welcome 🍷 I’m open to writing pretty much anything (within reason👻)

🇬🇧 Kyle “Gaz” Garrick 🇬🇧 (my favourite)

It’s 4am, but Kyle is already freshly showered and suited up to go on his next mission.

This is an all too familiar Deja vu moment for you, the sliver of light coming from the bathroom into your bedroom, the pungent citrusy aroma of his shower gel and aftershave. You pretend to be asleep, all the while your heart sinks further and further down your chest until it’s feels like it lies in the pit of your stomach.

You like to watch him discretely, peeking out from behind the duvet to observe him as he bustles around quickly, he’s expertly quiet, almost elegant in his movements, tucking things into his bag while he sips his coffee. You adored the way he looked when he thought no one was watching, when he was safe, a peaceful, docile look on his beautiful face, the expressions he pulled as he processed his thoughts with himself.

He hums a tune very quietly, something vapid and silly from the radio. He bends down to scratch behind the ears of your cat who had come to brush round his legs. “Look after them for me, mate.”

How you love the bones of him

You’ve always ask him to wake you up so you can see him off before he leaves, he never does. Somehow he can be up at a specific time without an alarm, you’re not quite sure how he does, and the success rate is too high for it to be a fluke. His logic for not waking you up is that it doesn’t matter either way, you’re better off with your rest and he’ll be back in no time, no tearful goodbyes we’re needed. Of course, the night before he leaves, the feeling in your gut and the rampant racing of your thoughts wouldn’t allow you the privilege of sleeping in anyway.

You keep your eyes shut lightly, steady and slow your breathing to mimic sleep.

As you keep your eyes closed you feel his presence near you, hear the rustle of his clothes and gear as he bends down and rubs his thumb across your cheek in impossibly feathery motions. You can picture his expression like it always is in these moments, his chocolatey eyes turning soft and hazy, his mouth resting in a tiny little pout of endearment, like his heart had just melted to goo his chest.

“You still asleep babe?” He mutters.

He waits for a few counts, and then once satisfied you’re still allegedly in your slumber he places a kiss to your forehead. “Back soon, promise. I love you,” comes the impossibly gentle whisper. He strokes your face a few more times, both hands brushing over your cheeks and forehead. It becomes hard to keep up the facade but you hold steady until he walks away.

It makes you crumble, the notion that he thought you were asleep yet still performed such a gesture, he wasn’t trying to comfort you, he was just trying to enjoy you for himself before he left.

It’s as your hear him open the front door that you call to him, as best you can, that you love him too.

He appears back in the doorway of your bedroom in an instant, with a ghost of an earnest grin gracing his face. You hold each others gaze for a moment before he’s making his way back over to you, grabbing your face and kissing you on the lips, he envelopes you in his arms in a firm, lingering embrace.

“Do you really have to go?” You mumble sleepily into his shoulder.

He hummed something incoherent, rubbing his hands up your sleeping shirt, to feel the skin of your back.

“Can’t you call in sick?”

He chuckles, its always such a sweet, rich sound, it’s the vocal equivalent to honey and cinnamon, it makes you hold him tighter. “I don’t think it works like that, babe.”

“What if you had like… a broken leg?”

“That’s a good point actually,” he says, releasing you and standing up again, feigning sincerity in pondering the idea. “Okay. Come on, come push me down the stairs.”

You giggle at him, spurned on by his playful grin. “Then you’d just be laid in hospital for weeks.”

“Yeah,” he leaned down to kiss you again briefly. “But we’d be together wouldn’t we?”

You nod, and before you know it, you feel a tear start to trickle down your face. Before you can wipe it away his hand is on your face, and he’s still smiling, just more fervently, he pours all his heart into his special, profound and reassuring little smiles, just for you.

“It’s okay, I promise it is. It will fly by. I won’t be gone too long this time. And it’s not too dangerous either.”

You nod, you share another kiss with him and he presses his forehead to yours for a moment, shutting his eyes before sighing and leaving you with a few /I love you/s

Just as you prepare to be alone, he appears again, the bright grin back on his face, pointing a finger at you. “And don’t watch the new season of Bridgeton while I’m gone, okay? Strictly off limits. I mean it. If I have to wait, so do you. We’re gonna watch it together.”

You throw your head back and laugh at him, pure joy from your stomach, and you shake your head quickly.

“I’m gonna watch it right now.”

He shakes his head. “Nah, you wouldn’t do that to me. I’ll just delete the account, no problem.”

He makes his way back down the hall.

“Show a bit of solidarity, yeah?” He calls as he’s making his way down the stairs. “Love you babe!”

And then he’s gone, and although you do shed a few tears, you can’t help but smile as you do.

🇺🇸 Phillip Graves 🇺🇸

You find that on the mornings Graves is due away on a mission, he can be almost cold - and he is not a cold partner or even person in general most of the time. You personally couldn’t discern why he became brusque and distant, keeping you at arms length, but you knew he was a busy man, too much on his mind perhaps.

You tried your best to be accommodating to him, staying out of his way, putting on a brave face, acting as if he was just popping to the office for a few hours, even making him a plate of his standard bacon and eggs, with his creamy sugary coffee.

“‘Preciate it,” he sighed, he placed a piece of bacon in his mouth as he flipped through some paperwork. “Shouldn’t be gone too long this time, alright?”

You didn’t answer, just continue scrubbing the pan of it’s grease.

“You hear me, darlin’?”

“I hear you,” you respond, turning around and you can feel your face is like stone, you’re still scrubbing. “Happy to hear it.”

He picks up his coffee mug and takes a sip, his eyes landing on you as you’re drying off a spatula. “Don’t look like that. Wipe that pout off your face.”

You clang the cooking utensil back where it belongs. “…Whatever Phill, I’m going back to bed.”

He gave you his signature /look/, it was something only akin to how a father gave a warning signal to his child, pointed, widened eyes, a terse little mouth. “That’s how you’re gonna see me off? What if I don’t come back?”

You feel your face crumple and swallow the harsh, stinging lump in your throat. “You always come back. You tell me you’re not in any real danger.”

“Right,” he retorts and clanks his mug down firmly. “I’ll hurry up and go then. Seems as if you’re looking forward to it.”

You watch him, cross-armed, as he begins to pick up his bags, “See you soon,” he calls over his shoulder and then the door slams shut.

You curse under your breath as you cross the living room to open the front door and walk out onto your driveway, arms still crossed to keep your robe wrapped around your body, the morning chill rippling the fabric against your skin.

He sees you and squints his eyes in puzzlement, but you merely open the passenger door and slip in the car next to him.

“Y/n,” he starts, raising an eyebrow, but you’re already lurched over with your arms draped around his neck, your face finding the toasty, musk scented crook of his neck. It only takes him a few moments to return the gesture and then some, scooping you across into his lap.

“Aw, come on baby, please don’t get like this on me,” he mumbles, a tinge of anguish to his tone as he rubs your back. “It’s like you said, I always come back.”

You pull away, climbing back in the passenger seat. “Everytime you have to leave, you act like you don’t even like me.”

He scoffed and shook his head quickly, turning away from you. “Come on, y/n, what are we? Teenagers? I’m just busy getting ready.”

You continue to glare holes into the side of his skull before he sighs, visibly deflating, his shoulder sinking down further, his back finally coming loose. “Alright, alright. Truth is…”

You wait patiently for him to wrap his tongue around whatever it is he needs to say, eventually he turns to you, placing a hand on your thigh. “… I just feel guilty leaving you. And getting all sentimental with ya in these times, well it just makes me feel worse. So I try my best not to. Selfish I know.”

He levels you with a pained look, eyebrows furrowed. “Sorry darlin.”

“Why do you feel guilty?”

“You being alone so much, having to wait around for me. Maybe if you had a man with a normal job-“

“I don’t want to hear any of that,” you cut in. “I choose you. And I know being with you comes with sacrifice, but I accept it all. You’re worth it.”

He lets out a joyless breathy chuckle, turning his gaze to his lap. “Am I though? Are you sure?”

You nod enthusiastically. “You’re the most amazing and beautiful man I’ve ever met, and will ever meet.”

“And I feel the same about you, but you give me the world,” he tells you. “And I… don’t do the same for you.”

“You do everything for me. Literally everything. Give me so much.”

He places his hands on the steering, as if he’s bracing himself.

“But I have to leave you all the time. And I don’t know, to me that makes everything I do for you seem like… nothing. I know you get lonely. Sometimes I worry that you’ll…”

He swallows and shakes his head to himself, “…never mind.”

You take a moment to process the revelation, your cheeks burn at the notion he could suspect you of cheating, but what was more striking was that everything you hadn’t been previously sure of made sense right then and there, like puzzle piece clicking into place to complete the whole grand picture. “You’re talking bullshit. But I wish you had told me how you felt sooner. And I would never, for the record, and never have.“

He took your hand in his, staring into your eyes with almost a desperation, it was spell-bounding to see him fold for you, to see his sapphire blue puppy eyes grow round, sad, misty, longing. “I’m a good boyfriend to you the rest of the time though, right?”

He’s genuinely asking, his breath is almost hitched in his throat. In this moment you see it, and you can’t see how you didn’t see it before, the apprehension, the nerves, the uncertainty. It made you want to take him by the hand, lead him back inside and get him back into bed where you could hold each other and you could whisper praise and words of adoration into his ear. You had a suspicion he was still only being partially transparent.

You didn’t want to believe he was scared, if he was scared, it made way for so much indecision and suspense.

You knew you’d have to start thinking of him as a mere mortal, and not the pristine, perfect machine he tried to portray himself as, it had been very indulgent and almost lazy, complacent even, to adopt that view of him, even if he had pushed it onto you. “You’re good to me all of the time,” you conclude.

You give him a final kiss, lay a hand on his arm before you leave the car.

“I’ll see you soon baby,” he murmurs.

You nod quickly, but as you turn your back you’re choking back your tears.

💀Simon “Ghost” Riley 💀 (oh my god his is so long)

“You awake love?” A huge hand shakes your shoulder firmly.

You mumble something incoherent and emit a small groan, rolling over to your side to see your boyfriend sat on the edge of the bed, his vast figure illuminated by the amber hue of the lamplight.

With that damned mask on no less. With the damned mask on…

“I am now, what’s up?”

He’s bent down to lace up his boots. “Gotta go. Gonna be away for a while.”

“Go where?”

“You know I can’t say.”

You sat up now, too quickly and it made your head swim. You feel the tinge of outrage on your skin, you tried to swallow the gravel in your throat, willing your face to stop heating up by the second. “Ooo,” you bite sarcastically, and sizzling acidic venom is dripping from your tongue, because he’s done it again. “You definitely told me you were going away, didn’t you? Thanks for letting me know in advance.”

“Sorry, it’s a last minute thing.”

“Bollocks is it,” you grumble.

He rises back up and twists his torso to look at you, raising a hand to place on your arm but you shrug it off aggressively.

The skull gazes at you for a moment, his hand recoiling back to his side. “Knew I should have left you asleep,” he concluded. “Knew you were gonna be a dickhead about it. This is why I don’t tell you fuck all.”

You struggle not to see red, you feel the special sort of anger only he can inspire start to creep and curl up your veins, as if you were frosting over. The fury for him was like a chained up beast, becoming more difficult to keep subdued the more he pushed, the more he tested you to see how much you’d let him get away with.

“That’s what you did last time,” you say, levelling him with a hard glare of ice and stone. “And it messed me up.”

You see his shoulders move up and down in what you assume was a tiny scoff. “Don’t say that. You’re exaggerating.”

“Don’t tell me how I felt, or how I feel,” you voice is sharp with defiance, but it seems to bounce off of him, it goes right over his head.

His phone, the burner phone, buzzed. He glanced at it and it was some sort indication to move. He stood up, his gigantic form looming over the bed, over you.

It would be a terrifying sight if you didn’t know what existed beneath that gear, behind that haunting mask.

Just yesterday the two of you had had the best day in a long time. You walked your dog through the woodlands for hours, you watched movies all afternoon and then in the evening he took you to your favourite restaurant, something you knew he despised. He hated public settings, it was as if they made him itch. Walking through the local shopping centre was difficult enough with him, his bad moods never failed to rub off on you and you would both come home mentally and emotionally depleted.

He much preferred dinner at home, he liked to cook, he liked to cook with you, shoulder to shoulder, the radio on or the tv humming away in the background, or he liked to order a Chinese and have you in his lap afterwards as you zoned out in front of the tv or watched him play a video game. It didn’t matter really, he always preferred the two of you alone, but he had pushed the boat out for you yesterday. He had been so unbelievably sweet.In fact he had been profoundly sweet all week…

You feel your emotional chest wound deepen gradually at the realisation. No, he had known, for weeks at best, a couple months at worst. You weren’t stupid. Perhaps he’d be better off with someone stupid, with zero perception, metaphorically blind. You could have been, and you were at first with him. The beautiful warmth that shone through the cracks of the glacial man, just for you, almost euphoric, almost drug like, stifling your senses, your common sense.

To have him soften for you, the way he took care of you, subtly adored you, guided you, soothed you, protected you, saved you from even the most minor discomfort.

You always said you wanted the sweetest man, but self indulgently it was the man who had no patience or time for anyone else in the world except for you that made you feel so… special, you dare say substantial. He had something angelic that was reserved only for you. He despised everyone, had distain for everything, but you… he just revelled in you. It blew your mind to this day.

That flame is always snuffed out by instances like this.

“Why can’t you just tell me when you have to go somewhere, Simon?” You try weakly.

He sighs loudly this time, his sighs and expression of agitation were usually used to silence you, to dismiss you, but this time it seemed genuine, like he’s run out of ideas for you. “Um,” he announces, raising a hand to scratch at the back of his head. “I don’t know, to be honest. Sorry.”

You feel your stomach turn in revolt, it was the worst possible answer. “You’re actually a joke, I hope you know that.”

“Maybe I am,” his voice is still so husky but loud, crystalline, inappropriately so in the silence of the early hours, it plays at your ears, makes them tingle. “Maybe this time apart will do us good.”

“What do you mean?��

“I don’t know, you can think about whether this is really the life you want.”

You furrow your brow, shaking your head in despair, you dig your finger nails into the bed, still warmed by his body, the great heat he emitted.

“What?” You lean forward, glaring accusingly, you feel your heart start to race, your lips tremor, your face burn. “You don’t care either way?”

His phone, the one you recognise to be his burner phone, buzzes, he looks at it and you can tell it’s a signal he needs to start moving.

“All I do is hurt you,” he murmurs, bending down to zip up his bag, he swings it over his shoulder.

“So don’t,” you throw your hands up in the air. “All you had to do was mention it. If you didn’t want me to make a big deal out of it I wouldn’t. If you needed space to prepare I would have given it to you.”

The phone buzzes again. “I have to go.”

But you’re climbing off the bed, racing to stand in his way. A bad decision, and you feel a twinge of guilt as soon as you do it.

“Y/n, please.”

“Do you want to be with me?”

“…I do.”

“So why do you do these things?” You can feel the tears dribble down your face now, you hand dashes up to wipe them away.

He’s silent for a moment, the skull stares down at you, contemplating, blinking slowly.

“Do you like seeing me hurt?”

“No.”

“Is this all some big game to you, do you get off on this?”

“No.”

“Are you trying to push me away?”

“I- No. I don’t really want you to go anywhere. I think you’re kind of stupid for staying with me sometimes, but I am grateful.”

You ignore the sting of the latter sentence, opting to focus on his initial statement.

“So why can’t you be honest with me?” You question, crossing your arms over yourself, trying to sooth the anxiety and distress that was settling into your bones. “If you want me to stay?”

He heaves another sigh and mutters a /fucking ‘ell/ under his breath. You don’t let his frustration deter you, or the fact he needs to be out the door. He perches on the arm of the sofa and pulls his mask off, gripping it in his hands, he stares down at it.

You watch his Adonis-esque face, his eyes have dimmed like he’s died inside. A small snag of guilt sets in, you’re aggravating him before a mission, it’s the opposite of what he needs, maybe this is why he doesn’t tell you.

“Do you know what, just go, Simon-“

“I didn’t,” he begins, he hesitates and then sighs, he shakes his head to himself before continuing. “I don’t want you to spend months counting down the days until I leave. I don’t want you to feel…/sad/.”

You pause, taking in the statement, and then place a hand on his arm, the barrier of his gear and heavy clothes making it seem like you were hardly even touching him.

“It’s okay to be a little bit sad sometimes.”

“Yeah,” he shrugs. “But I just want you to be your normal self.”

“Why?” You retort, automatically, eager to understand, the rare moment of openness driving you feral at the notion to syphon more information.

He places the mask back on and stands up again. “I really have to leave.”

You follow him to the front door, he pretends that you’re not. As he opens it you place a hand around his bicep and he stops, not bothering to turn around. He stands under the roof of the porch, the rain pummels down on to your driveway, you feel the spray and bitter breeze as it splashes down.

“Is it because… you think they might be our last days together?

“Yes,” he snipes back quickly, his irritation running deep through his voice.

You pull him back and he lets you, he even turns around and places his hands on your shoulder, establishing a firm grip, he stares down at you, slipping his eyes onto your as best as he could with the mask on. “Look, I don’t think you could ever really understand what it’s like, what I go out there to do.”

“So just tell me,” you sigh exasperated, “I’m ready to know the truth.”

“I can’t,” he hisses almost desperately, because he’s told you this many times. “I’m not allowed. And I don’t think I’d want to anyway.”

You press your lips together, swallowing hard. “Is it really that dangerous?”

“It is,” he punctuates the confirmation with a slight shake of your shoulders. “It really is. I’m sorry. I don’t want you to be worried. But I can’t stand here and tell you I know for sure that I’ll be back. I wish I could do that for you.”

“You don’t have to apologise for that, Simon.”

The phone buzzes again, it makes you stomach knot into a tight ball. “We can talk about it more, I promise.”

“And if you don’t come back?”

He pauses, he gazes down at you for a few beats before he lifts a hands to his face and peels up his mask, he leans down to press a hard, fire filled, kiss to your mouth. “Just remember that I love you. And only you. You’re all I have. But you…you have so much without me.”

“Not true,” you whisper to him helplessly, the tears can’t be contained any longer, you actually hear one drip to the floor.

He tuts and mumbles again. He steps forward and wraps his arms around you, your head hits his chest. “I know I’m not suppose to go about things this way, I’m so shit at this, y/n. Im still figuring it out, I was never suppose to have you.”

You hum a noise of question into his mountain of a body, asking him to elaborate. “I mean… I was never suppose to get into a relationship. But you just… I grew complacent by letting you into my life.”

He pulled away from you, holding you at arms length. You stay silent, willing him to continue, your eyes almost silently pleading. “But I got so tired of being alone all the time. And then you… I knew I was fucked the day I met you.”

You shut your eyes, your mind briefly fleeting to how you had asked him out, twice, and how hesitant he had been, how cautious he was, before falling into you and attaching himself to you, entwining himself and everything he consisted of with you.

“Now that’s the most you’re getting out of me,” he spoke, pointing his finger at you, his voice back to cold terseness. “I’m making myself cringe ‘ere.”

Despite yourself you manage a tiny smile at him, wiping away another stray tear. “Please come back.”

“I’ll try my best, love,” he speaks, turning around to leave once again. “Just keep yourself busy.”

And then he’s gone, you’re still in shock.

🦌Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra🦌

“Todays the day,” you say, as you sip your coffee. “Came around so quick.”

Rodolfo runs a tender, lingering hand over your shoulder as he takes a seat next to you.

Like many other mornings, the two of you had come out into the small cliff side garden behind your home, to watch the sunrise. You had a vast view of the whole town from up here. Life didn’t seem mundane or real in transient moments like this.

“Yet all the time you’re gone, it always goes by so slow.”

“Enjoy it,” he quips, reclining back in his seat. “When I retire, I’m gonna be under your feet, clinging to you twenty four seven. You’ll be grateful for this time.”

You chuckle with him but shake your head sincerely regardless. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You glance over at him, the gentle morning breeze ruffles his hair. He’s already dressed, ready to go in his jeans and t shirt, not strapped up with his gear yet, while you sit in your robe, the one that he claimed made his head swim.

You smile when he gazes back at you, and you can’t help the butterflies that flap their wings against your ribcage. He was just so beautiful, and more importantly he was well and truly yours. In every sense and aspect. His loyalty and dedication was profound and special, like the rarest gemstone.

“I can’t wait for you to retire actually,” you tell him as he takes your hand in his. “I can’t wait for you to be out of danger. It’s what I look forward to the most.”

His eyes soften for you, softer than they already are at his default. He has gentlest eyes you’ve ever seen, doe like, they’re the clearest indicator of what a humble, empathetic man he is. “I know, my love. I have no intention of doing this for longer than I have to.”

“Promise?”

“Of course,” he confirms nonchalantly, looking back out to the sunrise, the golden light reflecting off his face. “I know you can only truly be at peace once I leave it all behind. That’s what’s important to me.”

You turn to the look at the sunrise also with a small joyous laugh. “You’re the soppiest man I’ve ever met.”

He shrugged, rubbing circles into the back of your hand. “It’s like I’ve told you, deep down, I’m a lover, not a fighter. What can I say?”

“But are you a better lover, or are you a better fighter?” you turn to him, a teasing grin on your face.

“Oh,” He scoffed and a small smirk lit up his face, the boyishness he had left in him rising to the surface. “Don’t act like you don’t already know the answer to that. I’m happy to remind you before I leave, so it stays fresh in your memory, I still have a few hours.”

You laugh at him, but when you turn to him again he’s giving you a pointed look, something fiery glints in his eyes, his lips are pressed together earnestly. So you get up without a word, suppressing the haughty smile as you hear him follow you towards your bedroom.

He leaves with a kiss, a flurry of sweet nothings in your ear, and instead of feeling dismayed you feel hopeful. Optimistic. Less goodbyes were on the horizon from the sweetest man you had ever known.

🦚Alejandro Vargas🦚

On the mornings of he’s due out on long mission, Alejandro wakes you up with kisses, littering them on your face, your neck, for extra motivation he’ll plant some on your thighs and special one on your hip bone. He’d huskily murmur and ramble about how much he loves you and how he can’t wait for this bullshit to be over with so he can get back to you.

“Just want to lay in bed with you all day,” he’d groan into your neck. “Why do you have to be so warm and soft and delicious all the time?”

You laugh at him, cherishing the way his arms wrapped that extra bit tighter around you. “This is the life you picked,” you teased. “My hero, always making huge sacrifices.”

“Being away from you is the biggest sacrifice mankind has ever seen,” he propped himself up on his elbow, and bless his heart he did have a genuine, endearing pout on his face, like a child who didn’t want to get up for school. “You gonna be good for me while I’m gone? Best behaviour?”

You make a fake gaging sound, rolling your eyes heavily at him. “Hurry up and leave, my god.”

His response his to envelope you in a bear hug again, nipping at your ears and neck, squeezing your sides while you whine in protest.

It’s when he levels you with a heart felt sincere look you grow serious too, gazing back into his eyes wordlessly. He plants a kiss to your lips and you snuggle back into him.

“I love you so much,” he yawns. “So so much.”

“Love you more.”

“Impossible.”

You lay in silence for a while, his hold on you growing tighter, you fight the urge to drift back to sleep. “You know,” he sighs, kissing your temple. “Maybe they don’t need me for this one.”

“Really?” You ask, almost hopefully.

“No…” he groans dramatically into your hair, clamping a hand down onto the back of your head. “I /have/ to go. God damn it. Who would be me… Jesus Christ.”

Your suppress your grin and he curses to himself, forcing himself up. You almost cry at the sudden loss of contact. An impish smile comes to his face as he rips the sheets back, throwing them off the bed.

You recoil into yourself, your body clad in just your underwear meaning it’s instantly exposed to the fresh air. “You’re such an asshole.”

He laughs, running a hand through his hair. “When I come home,” he gestures towards your body, raising his eyebrows in approval. “You better be waiting for me just like that, I’ll accept nothing less.”

“You’ll come home to an empty house if you carry on,” you grumble as you cross the bed to grab the sheets, but you smile at him, rolling your eyes. “Go on, go shower, get ready, you’ll be late.”

He holds out his hand to you. “So what are you waiting for? Come on, you’re holding me up.”

You tut but can’t stop yourself from taking his hand. He leads you into the bathroom, and like always, you give him the send off that’s made him come to enjoy getting up to go on missions.

🥃Captain John Price 🥃

Expert preparation and years of experience meant the captain was calm on the mornings he was due on missions. You both got up very early, you cooked eggs while he flicked through a newspaper.

“This one���s gonna be a walk in the park, love,” he spoke to your turned back, voice more rich and decadent due to few hours he had been awake. “I’ll be back by Friday afternoon, easy.”

“If you say so,” you mused, a small smile coming to your face, yet your mind lingered on last time, he had come back with a vicious knife wound to the shoulder, a ghastly long laceration that you had to change the dressing for. You can remember the way the colour was stolen from his cheeks, how glassy his eyes had become and it was like a glimpse of something unspeakable… You swallowed the thoughts down, shooed the memories away like they were mischievous ghosts in the rooms of your mind. Your man had been doing this for years and years, he was the best in the game, you had nothing to worry about.

You soon placed the plate down in front of him, his scrambled eggs and toast, always his favourite. You watch him eat as you enjoyed your cup of coffee, he points his fork at the eggs and nods with satisfaction as he chews. “To this day, the best scrambled eggs I’ve ever tasted.”

You laugh silently, a small breath coming through your nose, but your know it doesn’t meet your eyes. You catch his gaze and he mirrors your emotion even as he chews. He’s caught you starting to slip into the sadness. “You’ll always be careful won’t you? Think of me before you jump in front of a bullet or something?”

He tosses the last piece of toast into his mouth and pauses before answering, wiping the crumbs from his hearty moustache. He then leans forward, reaching across the kitchen table to grab your hand, rubbing his calloused thumb over your knuckle and you look up at him.

“When shit hits the fan and I have to fight my way back home, tooth and nail, your gorgeous little face pops into my head, and that’s what drives me forward.”

You drop your gaze to your lap as you feel your heart ripple and flutter accordingly, a tender lump begin to swell in your throat. “Fight for yourself too. Don’t just do it for me.”

“No chance,” he dismissed. “It’s all for you, love. I’d be much more reckless if I didn’t have you here waiting for me.”

You breathe a smile and squeeze his hands, he raises your own hand to his lips, smiling into the skin gingerly as he kisses it.

As always, you stand at the front door as he gathers his bags and gear. He lays several languid kisses to your lips, relatively chaste but still passionate and lingering enough to make you wish you were both still entwined together in your beautifully warm bed. You ache when you remember how he had made love to you last night, like you were the most precious treasure to grace the earth, like he was scared to break you yet couldn’t get enough of you, like he couldn’t ever drink you in quite as much as he needed to.

He holds your face and stares for a moment, and you know he is drinking you in, surveying every feature. You can fully comprehend why that is.

“I love you, darling.”

“I love you too,” you respond softly, wrapping your hands around his wrists and turning your head to kiss his palm that’s right next to your mouth. “Please be careful.”

“Always.”

You watch him walk down the drive and get into the transport. You sigh, holding your chest, praying to whoever to bring him home once again.

🧼 Johnny “Soap” Mactavish 🧼

Your man, he was back from his run, hopping in the shower, all by 5am

You knew he was due away in a couple hours, so you thought you might as well get up with him. After all, if he could do all this before 5, the least you could do was get up and make him some breakfast.

You made him a full English, his favourite. The running and predictable joke between you two being of course, he was Scottish.

He was sat on the bed in his boxers when you brought it in on a tray.

“You shouldn’t have babe,” he grinned, all white teeth and sparkling blue eyes. Sometimes it was hard to believe he was a military man and not some swanky real estate agent or something.

You still flush and burn at him in this state, half naked, laying back propped against the pillow, staring up at you like you held the key to everything beautiful in the world.

“You’ve got a busy few weeks ahead of you,” you respond, setting the tray down. “Best you get off to a good start.”

He looked down at the food and then back up at you, a frown marring his features.

“Where’s yours though, hen?”

“I’ll make something later,” you wink. “Too focused on taking care of you right now.”

You sit down at the end of the bed as he tucks in. “I’ll have to put a ring on your finger if you carry on like this.”

You scoff, leaning back against the bed frame at the foot of the bed. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah,”he chirps back enthusiastically. “Married person behaviour this is. Going above and beyond the line of duty.”

He sucks some stray tomato ketchup off his thumb, watching you with mirth as you watch him back, mildly unamused. You found it quite cheeky for him to tease you with the idea of a proposal.

Still, you couldn’t take him seriously, it was extremely difficult to.

“Well,” you begin, nabbing a hash brown from the plate, he tries to swat your hand away but you’re too nimble. “You’re my big strong hard working man. And you deserve it all.”

“You’re damn right there,” he nods. “Wouldn’t argue with that at all.”

You sit in silence for a while, companionable and comfortable, the birds begin to chirp prettily as dawn breaks and soon Johnny turns off the small lamp on your bedside as daylight floods the room. He places the tray to the side, making a point of rubbing his stomach, much to your endearment, he has bloated a little, sporting a small pot belly now. “Amazing as always.”

You smile, shrugging at him. The melancholy begins to set in just as the alarm clocks red sabres set to 6am. He sensed it, a misty glaze coming over his face to mirror yours. “Gonna miss me huh?”

You nod quickly, ducking your head down.

He coos at you and then opens his arm, smiling consolingly. “C’mere gorgeous.”

You crawl to him, tucking yourself into his arm, laying your head on his chest and he begins to stroke your hair tenderly, his touch rendered unbelievably soft, lingering, it’s blissful. “Same as always. Gone for a little while, and then back again. Before you even miss me too much. What you gonna do while I’m gone?”

“Just working,” you murmur, you’ve shut your eyes now.

“And what else? Something fun?”

“Mm.”

“I know,” he taps your shoulder. “You keep telling me how you want to learn how to paint. You could go to art classes.”

You raise your head to look at him, to see if he was serious, you plant your hands in his chest. “Maybe…”

“Yeah you should,” he shakes your shoulder, as if he’s trying to get you excited. “I’ll pay, use my card. But you have to paint me something amazing. That’s my only condition.”

“Amazing? I’d be a beginner.”

“No excuses,” he smirked, tapping you on the nose. “I expect a Picasso… or a… um…”

You let out a laugh as his faces twists in confusion, something akin to a perplexed puppy. “Christ, you know that’s the only one I know. That’s bad, that is. Really should have stayed in school longer.”

You hum, resting your head back on his chest, feeling his flesh beneath your hands. “Love you.”

“Love you too sweetheart,” and he held you against him for as long as he could, before he had to set off on his travels.

You told him before he left; “I’ll paint you the best picture the worlds ever seen, as long as you come back.”

“Deal.”

[deityoftherain]

Zombiewood drabble, specifically limited life if possible :3?

Thank you for voting Flower Court in the @tangotekshipbracket! They deserve more love, honestly-

Ambiguous relationship zombiewood set during LimL? On it, boss o7

Knock, knock, knock!

The quick pattern sounded against the door to the Coral Isles, announcing Cleo’s presence before they ever used their voice. “Martyn?” Martyn raised a brow at that, curious what Cleo (or, perhaps, The Clockers in general) needed. Considering the “walls” weren’t actually walls at all, the door was useless in keeping people out. Most just went around it, but here Cleo was, waiting.

“Yeah?” Martyn inquired, exiting the chest room to go around the building and approach the zombie hybrid. “If you’re looking for Scott, he’s not here.”

“I’m actually here for you,” Cleo corrected as Martyn opened the door. She looked more exhausted than usual, shoulders hunched slightly and eyes creased with her lack of sleep. “Can I come in?”

Martyn raised an eyebrow at them, considering it for a moment. They didn’t appear to have malicious plans, so he stepped back and held the door open for them to walk through. “I won’t stop you.”

Cleo only nodded, officially entering the Coral Isles. Martyn led her up to the deck Scott had decorated, considering it the most comfortable place above water to take someone. “So whatcha here for? I mean, I’m always down to have a bit of a chinwag, especially with you, but y’know.”

“No reason in particular. Why? Am I not allowed to see my soulmate and my kids’ godfather?” Cleo asked lightheartedly, poking Martyn’s side.

Martyn batted her hand away with a chuckle. “I mean, a’course you’re allowed, but you don’t typically come all the way over here unless you need something. I’m usually coming to you.” Cleo’s playful expression morphed back to exhaustion as they rubbed at their face. “I just needed a break from Bdubs and Scar. I love them to death and back, don’t get me wrong, but playing the role of ‘mother’ is so draining.”

“I can imagine.” Martyn glanced toward the direction of the Clockers’ base, furrowing his brow for only a moment before turning his attention back to Cleo. “Eyy, well, mate, you’re always free to crash here. I’m sure Scott won’t mind. Chosen soulmates, gatekeep and gaslight, y’know.”

Cleo cracked a smile at that, an airy laugh escaping from their lips. “Thank you, Martyn. You’re the best.”

“I know.” Martyn smirked, allowing over exaggerated confidence to accent his words. He wrapped his arm around Cleo and she leaned against him. Their end positions had Cleo use Martyn like a pillow and Martyn perfectly content to snuggle his soulmate as she slept. Void knows they need it, and Martyn knew there were much worse ways to spend an afternoon than be trapped under Cleo’s resting body.

[halfbit]

meet the serpent's quest gang

its been ages since i drew them but everyone say hi to (left to right) wolf, lily, and solei, the main three in serpent's quest!!

they bond over medical debt and then get involved in dubious under-the-table business in order to pay it off and accidentally end up in a series of increasingly wild events leading them into the heart of a nation's purposely lost history that spirals into killing a self-made god to save two worlds.

here's some mini profiles for them:

WOLF (scummy protagonist) ~ early 20s / intj / flower magic / he's like if an assassin rogue was a healer and would rather be somewhere else / isekai'd trans guy, really good at being a dick, autistic, and always stressed about money. always happy to make more. very nihilistic about the world, but also very optimistic when it comes to his potential success? he would probably kin plankton. he also tends to see himself and others in black in white, and assumes either the absolute best or the absolute worst. he doesn't care what people think of him unless he needs them for something.

LILY (the heart, also very confused) ~ 12-14 / isfp istp / shield magic / she's a tank until she shatters her own shield, and then you're fucked / isekai'd she's too busy suppressing her traumas to address things about herself yet, but she'll probably have realizations later. she is also autistic and doesn't realize yet either. her key word is nuance and ambiguity, she's in flux a lot, uncertain of everything, including what she wants, who she wants to be, and whether she can actually do any of it. she tries to hide a lot of her feelings and "stay positive" which makes her initially appear to be just bubbly and kind of childish. she wants to be liked by others.

SOLEI (moral compass but like. complicit) ~ 19-22 / enfj / beast magic / primary damage dealer, turns into a fluffy snow leopard thing / he's just from here he's like if a guy who was up in people's business was polite and well-meaning about it. loves to talk, has friends everywhere, and on good terms with most of his old colleagues. he has some strong opinions but he usually doesn't actually express them since he doesn't like making a scene. the more you think about him, the more he becomes a lil hmmm. the "guy who gets along with everybody is a friend of nobody" type, and he doesn't realize how that looks. always downplaying, mediating, and playing the field. cares more about appearances than he lets on.

this is probably the best intro i'm sharing anytime soon so!! enjoy

i promise serpent's quest is a goofy and fun isekai. you can trust me. there is only a little violence and blood. and dramatic moments of trying to save someone from destroying themselves (repeated). and being angry at god. and they kiss too i guess. but it's not focused on that, it's mostly about the killing god and becoming okay with yourself. and making a new home when you can't return to the one you lost. and the little moments where you learn to put some faith into people. and the painful ones when you realize you can't. but also just goofy fantasy stuff. they ride big ass geese that used to eat people. there's huge turtles that preserve ancient languages, with their shells the canvas telling the stories of the generations of past. there's some weird mythology that is sometimes real and sometimes just stories. there's a river to the sky. there's long-dead giants. there's underground dungeons. there's a complete disregard for the safety and well-being of the disenfranchised from the government. there's also these weird water cats that can parrot human speech. there's something happening here, and it's much bigger than anyone realizes.

[quartz-tsw]

Demo | Forum

You are a high school student passionate about writing interactive fiction novels. Grammar, story structure, character design, and story design are foreign concepts to you, but that won’t slow you down because you have passion and the power of friendship on your side. A tragic accident sends you into a coma, transporting you into the world you have created.

Explore a world filled with bugs, excessive stats that cancel each other out, and ambiguous choices. Romance one-dimensional characters, overcome poorly designed challenges to escape the hell you’ve created, and become the Strongest Writer!

The game is primarily narratively driven, even though there will be silly challenges sprinkled here and there. Some random elements are present, but they won’t stonewall your progress. You will never be forced to replay an encounter because you had a bad die roll. Ridiculously difficult or poorly worded mini-games will pop up here and there. But the ones that have “correct” solutions are accompanied by a skip button that can be used without any punishment.

You will have a mobile base of operations, a castle that can fit in your pocket, where you can grow plants, make potions, train with your companions and decorate your rooms. After you reach a certain point in the game, time will advance when you complete quests, making the plants grow. The plants can be used for brewing potions that will add more flavor to future encounters but aren’t a prerequisite for progress.

At the end of each chapter, you will enter a dream-like state where you can communicate with the Real World via a powerful artifact. However, the communication is limited to sending updates to the game you’re trapped in and reading the player’s feedback on the forum.

After the first part of the game, you will get to have a say on how the Empire grows over the course of the story by voting on policies. These policies will get enacted if you and your crew complete quests that will sway the citizens in your favor. You will be free to tackle specific issues from a progressive or conservative lens without having the game punish you for making the wrong choice. Scratch that. Whatever you choose will have catastrophic consequences on the Empire but in different ways. By the end of the story, the Empire will be in crisis.

The game is split into three parts: Escape from the Underworld, Rise of the Empire, and Fall of the Empire. In the first part, you will escape the Underworld, the hell of your fictive world, with the aid of your fully customizable romanceable companion, Olympia/Olympus. You will gather a party of virtuous souls and traverse the Great Barrier into the surface world. Upon escaping the Underworld and entering the MC’s fictional world, the “Real” World, you and your companions become Immortals, overseeing the fate of the Empire for centuries to come.

At the time of writing the story, the MC was sick of all the medieval fantasy stories that resort to misogyny for the sake of realism, so they wrote an “inclusive” setting that “solves” inequality issues only on a surface, superficial level. The Empire is a mishmash of Ancient Rome and Ancient Greece under constant assault by progressive barbarian hordes who enslave and torture citizens equally, regardless of gender, race, or sexual orientation. Political decisions in the Empire are ultimately made by a supreme ruler, Caesar, but every citizen has a right to express their grievances and opinions in the Forum (an actual roman style forum, not an online one).

As generations pass, you and the Immortals will oversee the Empire grow from antiquity to a steam-punk future near its decline.

Olympus/Olympia

age: unknown/ timeless

race: unknown

gender: player selectable

appearance: custom

Olympia/Olympus is the first immortal that the MC encounters in the Underworld. The self-proclaimed soul mate of the main character, Olympia/Olympus, is the primary romantic option for the player. Kind-hearted, straightforward, overpowered, and with a non-existent sense of personal space, Oly will accompany the MC almost everywhere. The only times when you will be apart is when you have to do challenges alone.

Bellona

age: 27

race: human

gender: female

appearance: average height, athletic build, olive skin, brown eyes, long brown hair in a high ponytail.

Bellona is one of the finest warriors of the Empire, who knew no equal on the battlefield until she found her end at the Kālá’s hand, whom she managed to take down with her to the Underworld. Abandoned at a young age by her parents, she had to learn to fend for herself and develop a can-do attitude that no one rivals. Impulsive by nature, she has no regard for diplomacy - her creative swear words are common in any heated discussion. The one thing she hates more than whining and weakness is others picking on her friends, even for the most trivial things.

Athena

age: 30

race: human

gender: female

appearance: tall, slim build, fair skin, green eyes, undercut, blonde hair.

Athema is a scholar, politician, and equal rights activist. She died at a banquet where a political adversary poisoned her wine cup. Outspoken and articulate, her opinions have sown the seeds of critical thinking within the Empire, prompting a vocal minority to question whether the Empire will be remembered as a bastion of enlightenment in history or a shameful asterisk. Competent in rhetorical debates, she never backs down from a winning argument, even if it means losing political currency. Although she stands her ground firmly in intellectual standoffs, physical confrontations are a no-go for her, looking for cover at the first sign of danger.

Hera

age: 22

race: human

gender: female

appearance: petite, light skin, heterochromia eyes (blue and green), braided, black hair.

Hera is a quiet, reserved young woman whose life ended in mysterious circumstances. She does not remember how she died or does not want to tell anybody. Although she does not enjoy getting involved in politics too much, she is convinced that the best way to organize society is through clearly defined gender roles. Family is the most important thing to her, and she hopes that she will be able to start one as soon as possible. Her cooking and organizing skills are unmatched, which is why she was often employed by wealthy nobles to host their lavish banquettes.

Vulcan

age: 46

race: human

gender: male

appearance: burly, gray hair, groomed silver beard, dark skin 

A respected inventor, this reclusive self-reliant man found his end at the hand of an ambitious experiment to replicate the sun in his forge. Even though he feels more at home with his inventions than with people, he is kind and gentle despite losing his temper from time to time. Vulcan will be the main driving force behind the rapid technological advances that the Empire will go through during the game, and you will have a say in what innovations take priority.

Plutus

age: 33

race: human

gender: male

appearance: tall, thin, blond messy hair

This neurotic treasurer got on the wrong side of a knife after uncovering a circle of corrupt aristocrats who were siphoning gold out of the treasury. His obsessive compulsion to account for every penny spent makes him an excellent financial advisor for your team. His expertise will be invaluable in growing the Empire over the centuries.

Kālá

age: unknown

race: unknown

gender: unknown

appearance: short legs, wide hips, elongated torso with thin, long arms, large hands. Dark skin, black eyes, bald. Wears extravagant clothes.

Little is known about them besides their affiliation with the Barbarian hordes and unorthodox fighting style. Before the encounter with Bellona, Kala was undefeated in combat. Has the role of the main antagonist of the story.

Olympia/ Olympus will be the only RO with which you can have a meaningful, long-term romantic relationship. There will be the possibility of having flings with minor, episodic, one-dimensional characters. But you will not be able to be in a relationship with other immortals (but that does not mean you can’t try). As far as the attraction to Oly is concerned, you have multiple options: regular attraction, no attraction, “platonic” attraction, “asexual” attraction, too much attraction, and attraction once you get to know each other better. There will be no explicit sex scenes, but you can expect bizarre scenes that kind of resemble it.

[ohgaylor]

IT MUST BE EXHAUSTING (AN ANALYSIS)

Hi. Taylor’s the problem. And she knows it. (affectionate)

All right friends. It’s time to dive into an analysis again. I’ve been reflecting on a lot of Midnights and Taylor’s ever-present self-deprecation this era and in my regular fashion, I had to make an extremely long-winded analysis post about a certain motif of hers that I’ve noticed has only grown more apparent this time around. and essentially that is her self-awareness toward her ever-ambiguous signaling in regard to her identity, and where she is positioned in the complicated and delicate journey of coming out, as well as the plethora of emotions that surround that for both herself and her fans and those of us who pick up on the queer coded subtext of her music and art.

to kick off this analysis, may I remind you of this beauty of a quote from Taylor’s 2018 reputation tour pride speech that prefaced Delicate?

I want to send my love and respect to everybody who in their journey and in their life hasn't yet felt comfortable enough to come out ... and may you do that on your own time and may we end up with a world where everyone can live and love equally and no one has to be afraid to say how they feel. When it comes to feelings and when it comes to love and searching for someone to spend your whole life with, it’s all just really really delicate.

That is quite possibly my favorite thing she’s ever said. and what inspired this tag.

Now I need to clarify up front — I am never insinuating a need or even desire for Taylor to come out. Because that’s not our place to say. If you’ve been around my blog long enough, I would hope that nuance would be apparent. I simply point out regular motifs and patterns within her art and how it correlates with queer-coded themes of closets, of almost coming out, of outright queer coding, of rainbows, of keeping a love secret and safe, and on and on and on. The signs are there if you know what to look for (re: “I gave so many signs”) and that’s what I explore on my blog. The point is, I will never demand she come out. But I will stand with her in this complex journey she appears to be on. It’s entirely her journey and however she wishes to navigate that is hers to decide.

but that doesn’t detract from the reality that for those of us who see this beautiful queer subtext of her art and music and visuals and work and self, the ambiguity and constant back-and-forth when it comes to her identity (and the idea of coming out) can in fact be a lot to try and process and understand and ultimately to reconcile as we root for her. Trying to understand where she stands is much like chasing a moving target. (not that she owes any explanation to us, because again, she doesn’t.) her art and creativity are her place of expression and catharsis. however, watching her navigate these complexities and trying to root for her in this sometimes messy space is also, dare I say, exhausting.

hence, the title and general theme of this analysis.

so let’s begin.

First, we have this verse in Anti-Hero which is the perfect setup to illustrate this specific motif,

I should not be left to my own devices They come with prices and vices I end up in crises Tale as old as time

This is essentially the thesis of Taylor’s message, the feeling that her own judgement and actions might be the very cause for certain crises she finds herself in, however enticing those vices and choices may be. In choosing to straddle a glass-closeted lifestyle as an artist at her status and level of fame, all the while heavily queer-coding to her (receptive) audiences, only to be seen by most others as the hallmark of straight women as per her highly publicized bearding, juggling this all can be overwhelming. But it’s also a space that she has essentially curated and perpetuated herself.

An anti-hero is a central character in a narrative who conspicuously lacks heroic, moral qualities:

Although antiheroes may sometimes perform actions that are morally correct, it is not always for the right reasons, often acting primarily out of self-interest or in ways that defy conventional ethical codes.

Identifying herself as the anti-hero in this sense comes as a candid confession, as though she is admitting that maybe she is driven by self-interest. (which again, she is entitled to as we all are in our own lives.) (re: the jokes weren’t funny, I took the money, my friends at home don’t know what to say) Alternatively, and perhaps additionally, acting out of self-interest in this context may mean concealment of parts of her identity for the sake of self-preservation. The nuances behind why she hasn’t chosen to come out are at play here and I doubt any of us can fully comprehend what that is exactly.

I never had the courage of my convictions, as long as danger is near

Pouring out my heart to a stranger but I didn’t pour the whiskey

Combat, I'm ready for combat. I say I don't want that, but what if I do? 'Cause cruelty wins in the movies. I've got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you … Dark side, I search for your dark side. But what if I'm alright, right, right, right here?

You can easily grasp the intense oscillation as she goes back and forth between these decisions while juggling a myriad of reasons and factors, all of which are incredibly weighted. She knows it’s exhausting for us because it’s that much more exhausting for herself.

So, she elects to pursue a route all too familiar to closeted individuals in the public eye, one of bearding and concealing their identity.

I had some tricks up my sleeve … Perched in the dark, telling all the rich folks anything they wanna hear, like it could be love, I could be the way forward, only if they pay for it … the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to fuck this up

I took the money. My friends from home don't know what to say.

The cost at which this lifestyle comes is worthy of an analysis all on its own. But Taylor seems to be indicating that she has found safety and security in her self-made cages and closets of sorts.

I prefer hiding in plain sight

‘Cause shade never made anybody less gay

If the shoe fits, walk in it 'til your high heels break

My town was a wasteland, full of cages, full of fences*, pageant queens and big pretenders. But for some, it was paradise.

In the darkest little paradise

(also, note the *fences. I’ll come back to that later.)

She brings focus to the fact that her town was full of cages and fences, which initially may carry a negative connotation. But here’s where she turns it around and says that for some, it was place of paradise, that the self-made cages brought security and freedom. That the idea of “forever” is in fact the sweetest con. That the good life she was hustling for through the tricks she had up her sleeve is within grasp. That this could be the way forward. Tell me that doesn’t scream a queer-coded experience?

But knowing Taylor and the complicated nature of this deeply personal topic, there is also a level of remorse regarding the said-cages and choices that had put her in crisis.

I cut off my nose just to spite my face, then hate my reflection for years and years

I’ve got a hundred thrown out speeches I almost said to you

I’d pay if you’d just know me

Now, despite the way she has managed to remain glass-closeted, a large subset of her fans and the general public completely miss what she is signaling in regard to her queerness. (re: “I gave so many signs / you didn’t even see the signs”) but it appears she is feeling some remorse for the devices she’s used and the way she’s navigated things because she knows that she’ll be the one paying for it.

So again, Taylor fully acknowledges she’s the problem. She endlessly dances around the topic, sometimes to an extreme (re: “bent the truth too far tonight,” Bettygate and specifying a male perspective despite widespread interpretation of the alternative; similar thing with Lavendergate, etc etc) She writes from “male perspectives” so as to have a way to write female pronouns. She uses pseudonyms for similar motives. She equates herself with gay pride and places herself adjacent to the community repeatedly, and dances in Gaylor Park and rainbow kaleidoscopes. She dresses in rainbow attire and gives speeches emphasizing the delicacy of coming out and on and on, all while also remaining straight-passing. It’s complicated and messy and indeed exhausting.

sending signals to be double-crossed

I’ll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror. It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero

no doubt these devices and choices have come at a cost. first, the personal cost of remaining closeted (or in the very least, glass closeted) by her own making. The nature by which she has driven her career, of “taking the money” and pursuing a career (and by extension, following heteronormative cultural standards of remaining closeted), all point to the self-made cages she twists in.

recall the Delicate pride speech…

I want to send my love and respect to everybody who in their journey and in their life hasn't yet felt comfortable enough to come out ... and may you do that on your own time

That is a major theme for her. The idea that through a closeted state, certain freedoms can coexist.

We know Taylor has made a point to emphasize the comfort she has found in keeping elements of her life to herself post her apocalyptic summer. And the way she has largely receded her personal life from the public eye is telling. In an effort to protect the “real stuff”, she is withholding from others and has found safety in that.

Privacy sign on the door and on my page and on the whole world, romance is not dead if you keep it just yours.

She knows it’s not always a world that some would choose to be a part of. She describes it as a wasteland, likely desolate, harkening back to cowboy like me. A place where hustling for the good life, perching in the dark as con artists (or pageant queens and big pretenders) and telling all the rich folks anything they want to hear like “it could be love” is all too familiar.

It’s a painful dichotomy she fully explores in The Archer, recognizing that maybe it’s her lot in life to straddle these lines of staying where she is, perched in the dark, while wanting to step into the daylight and let it go.

and that’s where the second cost comes in — in how those of us who see her for what she is signaling herself to be, are ultimately left to ourselves to make sense of it.

It’s the same kind of essence of this fantastic analysis regarding coney island and her apology of not making us certain subsets of her fans and communities her centerfold.

Being left to her own devices, she has ultimately crafted a duplicitous persona, of which she has spoken about specifically when discussing mirrorball…

Everybody else feels like they have to be on for certain people. You have to be different versions of yourself for different people. Different versions at work, different versions around friends, different versions of yourself around different friends. Different version of yourself around family. Everybody has to be duplicitous, or feels that they have to in some ways, be duplicitous. And that’s part of the human experience, but it’s also exhausting. You kind of learn that every one of us has the ability to become a shape-shifter. But what does that do to us?

Is it self-preservation? Or self-made self-destruction? (re: “they told me all of my cages were mental” “what a shame she’s fucked in the head” “lost in the labyrinth of my mind”)

Among the various anxieties that plague her in regard to this subject, Taylor makes one fear very clear. And that is for some inevitable day where we will leave her after we’ve had enough of “her scheming”.

'Cause they see right through me, they see right through me, they see right through. Can you see right through me?

I wake up screaming from dreaming One day I'll watch as you're leaving 'Cause you got tired of my scheming For the last time

These desperate prayers of a cursed man spilling out to you for free, but darling, darling, please, you wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking if you knew where I was walking

Will you forgive my soul when you're too wise to trust me and too old to care?

She will get as close as she can to the topic, (“Gay pride… everything that makes me me!” to name just one) only to pull back or leave it ambiguous and devoid of clarity…

I'll stare directly at the sun but never in the mirror

And I cut off my nose just to spite my face Then I hate my reflection for years and years

…only to feel guilt for skirting around the topic…

You said I was freeloading … I bent the truth too far tonight, I was dancing around, dancing around it … Your picket fence is sharp as knives, I was dancing around, dancing around it

This to me is the a significant price that comes from her being left to her own devices. Yes, there is freedom that comes from closeting/bearding. But glass closeting brings a more painful mess of emotions for both the closet-er and those seeing it for what it is. This is what she addresses in Anti-Hero with painful clarity.

And sometimes this can come at a painful cost. Take YNTCD for example. In this video, she positions herself within the queer community, dancing in Gaylor Park, and boldly declares herself an advocate for LGBTQIA rights.

But as we know, the video was met by many as out-of-touch (re: “freeloading”), performative and whatever else critics were spewing.

motion capture put me in a bad light. I replay my footsteps on each stepping stone, trying to find the one where I went wrong. writing letters addressed to the fire

Now for a detour.

I want to talk about the purple / blue / lavender glitter for a minute. Here, in the Directors on Directors interview, Taylor describes the glitter as being a metaphor for herself...

It’s supposed to be a metaphor for like, I bleed glitter, I’m not normal, there’s something wrong with me, I’m not a person, I don’t belong, I don’t fit in anywhere.

Recall how I said chasing a moving target?

Let’s talk about the significance of this scene and a handful of others in terms of the lavender glitter.

[For some queer context regarding glitter]

I’d first like to point out Hayley Kiyoko’s purple glitter jacket above, from the YNTCD video. This is Hayley Kiyoko we’re talking about. The proclaimed Lesbian Jesus. And in this moment, while she is wearing the purple glitter jacket, she is aiming an arrow at a target, signifying The Archer. This moment is key.

And then you have the Miss Americana documentary, wherein Taylor explicitly equates herself with gay pride, while talking about the Me! music video.

It’s a line of dialogue that screams at me with such intensity. Irrefutable. As a film editor, I know that every line in a film is deliberately placed and thought out and meticulously addressed. And therefore we can trust that Taylor intended for this line to make it into the film. I can tell that surrounding dialogue is seemingly trimmed and crafted in a delicate way. And part of that is the very direct statement that “Gay pride…everything that makes me, me!”

And it’s within this music video that we again witness a massive “ME!” literally jumping out at us on screen, in none other than purple glitter.

A handful of others could sense that the conclusion of Miss Americana felt as thought it was headed in a different direction than the one it ultimately took. And that for whatever reason, Taylor’s political advocacy took center stage while a deeper analysis regarding her LGBTQIA advocacy did not.

Cut back to the Anti-Hero music video where we get The Archer aiming right for Taylor, and striking her, causing her to bleed, yet again, purple glitter.

Pierced through the heart but never killed… did you hear my covert narcissism I disguise as altruism, like some kind of congressman

My covert (secret) narcissism (ME!) I disguise as altruism like some kind of congressman (the political turn and advocacy present in Miss Americana)

In other words, covering up who she is (“gay pride… everything that makes me me!”) under the guise of a film almost exclusively focused on her journey of discovering her political (“Vote for me for everything” pin) activist voice. And what scene depicts this with near precision???

this one.

motion capture put me in a bad light. I replay my footsteps on each stepping stone, trying to find the one where I went wrong. writing letters addressed to the fire

'cause cruelty wins in the movies, I've got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you

The subsequent look on her face of absentminded agony says it all. She knows the confusion that comes from rooting for her as (especially if she is seen as an ally who maybe crosses one too many lines if presumably as straight.)

The inner-turmoil on display for us in The Archer has transformed into a tone all too exhausted in its own right within Anti-Hero. She knows we’re tired. She’s tired too. In a self-deprecating jab, she admits that she is the problem and she knows that everybody ultimately agrees with her on this. Shielded within a pop anthem, her vulnerability is on display. And so, in Dear Reader, with equal parts desperation as well as wit, she concludes…

You should find another guiding light, guiding light. But I shine so bright.

And so it is ultimately within this utterly messy, exhausting, complicated, ever-changing and nuanced journey that Taylor reaches out to those of us who do in fact see through her and who ultimately simply see her, that she asks us in all sincerity…

Who could stay? Who could stay? Who could stay? You could stay.

And I, for one, will stay.

[enjoy my other analyses here]

[angled-blade]

hi! i’m unsure if you write for billy loomis, but if you do could i get billy loomis x reader who, them and their friend group / just a bunch of ppl from another school are new to woodsborro high (or whatev) and reader tries to one-up billy’s popularity and then ends up falling for him? (yeah it’s long i kno <\3 thankies! if it’s too complicated no worries! i 100% understand /gen)

Falling for your rival, Billy Loomis.

Pairing(s): Billy Loomis/Reader Type: Ambiguous | Headcanons

➻ You remembered your first day in a newly transferred school as if it were only yesterday—perhaps even a couple of days ago if you were generous about it. You were sure that the memory of entering Woodsboro was one you couldn’t really forget—even if you wanted to do so.

—

You and a couple of your friends had been transferred over into Woodsboro, you never recalled the details as to why, but it had been in the early half of junior year. You were already well adjusted in your previous school, so it comforted you somewhat to meet some familiar faces that tagged along—even more when some were from your friend group. You made sure to stick with one another as you begin to adjust yourselves in the new school.

In the first two months or so, you stuck with your group of friends as you accustomed yourself with how the school itself functioned. Sure, you played a little too safe—but the rumours about Woodsboro reached the ears of many, just as much as those very mouths utter the town itself. Gossip spread far and wild, the town’s image of a ‘quiet little community’ shattered as the many controversies that greeted it for the past few years ones were one that left it in a sight of silent infamy. It couldn’t hurt to at least be careful, lest you offend people in some way or another.

—

➻ You learnt of the people who were popular in school—and you’ve especially heard about Billy Loomis. You couldn’t place a finger on him, but you had always felt that something about him was.. off. Though, without concrete proof—there was really no reason for you to antagonise him nor have such an uncomfortable feeling to settle in the very pit of your stomach.

➻ Billy Loomis was an extremely popular person in school, in spite of the fact that his reputation was an anomaly for such a town. He got along with the rest of his peers, no matter how unlikely the situation of them getting along were. It felt planned, hence a reason for you to feel strangely unnerved of him. You backed down when it appeared that everyone was used to his strange antics and equally suspicious behaviour.

➻ Nevertheless, you were quick to learn of how the school functioned, your reputation seeming to rise positively the more you interacted with the students of Woodsboro. To your surprise, you seemed to grow popular as the months rolled by.  It was a feat that had your original friend group cheering you on. 

➻ This positive rise in reputation did not go unnoticed by Billy Loomis, though it most likely due to the fact that he overheard it from Tatum as she gossiped to her boyfriend. Stu acted surprised, though Billy saw the glint of interest that was hard to see through—it always looked like a deer in headlights, unknowing of everything that happens as if he wasn’t the nosiest person in Woodsboro. 

—

“Oh, oh! Do you know about ___? They got pretty popular after… get this,  a few months! Gotta respect them though, it’s tough getting in everyone’s good graces.” Tatum finished her statement, quietly giggling at Stu’s now awestruck look, a mumbled ‘No way, really?’ escaping him.

‘Hypocrite,’ was what rang through Billy’s mind as he saw Stu’s clearly orchestrated expression. Everything else that tumbled out of that girl’s mouth was inherently useless to him except for that tidbit about you. 

Billy stared at Stu, the other male catching sight of this and adapting a conversation topic into Tate’s, a method to tear information from his girlfriend.

“Tell me more about this ___, Tates.” Stu pried, his head tilted in a way in which he didn’t seem to be interested in you romantically, but rather one of curiosity in learning more about the student. “—Wanna know if they’re someone we can be friends with, ya’know?” Again, this was yet another orchestrated act.

And with that, Billy took in every bit of information Tatum had. The more he learnt about you, the more he felt confident in his abilities to interact with you now.

The only thing left to do was to get your attention and see how it goes—whether or not it was worth to take a shot in gaining the trust of (well, mostly) everyone if he dated you.

—

➻ You couldn’t help but feel uneasy about Billy Loomis now. He began approaching you, out of the blue. The following week after summer break, you could see Billy almost everywhere. You had your own doubts about Billy initially, maybe even getting used to him—but this returned you back to square one.

➻ Be it by requesting to borrow a pencil from you specifically, in spite of the fact that you were six tables away—there was a lot of chatter about that, which especially annoyed your school friends. 

—

“Fuck, ___. Is he ever letting up? I swear this is, like, the eighth time we’ve seen him. He doesn’t even hang around here!” Hissed a frustrated Alex as he poked at his sandwich. Alex was a close friend—maybe the closest in your friend group. He had been unfortunate enough to see everything unfold before him, all those interactions by Billy were not at all subtle—which had him uncomfortable too, knowing the other guy’s history as a player. 

“He’s so weird—always coming to you out of fuckin’ nowhere just to ask for a pencil? Wait ’til Jess hears this. That Loomis kid is giving me a lot of red flags with how he’s—”

“—I get it, Alex. Let’s just leave it at that, your sandwich is probably becoming soggy.” You interject. 

“He’s giving me all sorts of warnings, too. I’ll keep my distance, there’s honestly way too many of them to ignore.” Almost in an instant, a familiar girl bounds over to the table where you and Alex sat. It was Jessica.

“...So what about that Billy kid?” she asked, having only heard Alex’s words and not yours. 

You groaned at this, already fed up with all this talk about the boy. Jessica stares at you questioningly, before taking her chance to demand answers from you.

You begrudgingly reply to all of her queries.

—

➻ Of course, time had passed by then. Your encounters with Billy lessen as the days dragged on, much to your relief. Though, the same could not be said for Billy. According to him, your standoffish behaviour and hesitance planted doubts in his plan to get you with him.

➻ It begun when he saw how you looked at him when he was walking past you. It had him torn at both ends. One was nervous of getting caught before he could pull the curtain of his movie, the other intrigued in how you may interfere with his plans, seeing how distrusting you were of him.

➻ Billy took a step back, feeling quite annoyed with this development. Did you think of him as lesser? Perhaps even thinking that you were better than him, out of his league? The lack of development in your relationship with one another cemented that idea as fact, which had him grow a lot more annoyed. Unbeknownst to you,, his overthinking mind zeroes in on the idea that he should no longer see you as just anybody—but rather someone who he now considers as a rival.

➻ It was somewhat tense on Billy’s end, seeing how he keeps tabs on you and how you remained indifferent yet extremely distant with him. He wanted to at least have a reason to strike you back, maybe even to guilt you into a relationship with him. The longer he kept searching for a reason, the more his original plans deviated into ones of wonder and a deeper curiosity to find out everything about you. It got to a point where Stu even pointed it out, which had Billy reevaluating everything that he has done up until that point.

—

“Bro, again?” Stu teased, a hand wrapped around Tatum’s waist as he pulled her a little closer to his chest. A playful smile was across his features now.

“What?”

“You’re practically drooling at them, Billy. When you gonna stop staring and tell them whatever you got on your mind?” Tatum rolled her eyes, repositioning herself in Stu’s lap, leaning against his chest to relax her posture. “It’s as if you—” She stops in her tracks, stopping Billy from interjecting at the sudden pause.

“—Oh my god.” Tatum squeals. “Did you fall for ___? Is this an—don’t tell me—no, that you fell for the new kid? Ohhh gosh, that is so cute. Right, Stu?” Tatum rambles, body becoming jittery with excitement. 

“You’re so right, Tates. So smart.” Stu chuckled, giving Billy a knowing look in the process. He would have laughed at his friend, but he’d rather not ruin the moment. It’s not everyday that you see a red-faced Billy Loomis, his expression entirely caused by embarrassment.

—

➻ The same appears to occur with you, with less of Billy’s attempts to interact with you, you find yourself looking his way a little more than usual. He seemed to understand boundaries and had backed off when you became more distant with him—keeping him at arm’s length, as Jess suggested—you took your time to learn about him, too. Were you too hard on him? You wondered yourself. This change in attitude toward the subject Billy quickly caught the attention of your friend group.

—

“Okay, stop. ___. Did something happen to you?” Jessica spoke up first, catching the attention of Vince, who had tagged along with you as you left for lunch.

“Uh, no? Why do you ask?” You respond. She stares at you with suspicion, eyes squinted as if she thought that you were lying. “You sure? It was definitely you who was looking at Billy in English—You are so lucky Mrs. Lake didn’t even—”

“—wait, wait a minute.” Marcus interjects, turning to you in disbelief. “You did what? What happened to ‘I’ll keep my distance’? Are you having a crush on him or—” A pause was in Marcus’ voice now, feeling shocked at how easily those words tumble out.

“—Are you really? Like, actually?” He stares at you, softening his voice a little more now. He seemed worried that he had spilled out a secret that you might not want to reveal so soon.

“...Maybe.” You murmured, your whisper loud enough for the both of them to hear. You three were out of the building, the chattering from students deafening. Jessica bit her lower lip, feeling as though she had overstepped a boundary of yours, which was sort of true in this case. 

“Oh shit, really?” Marcus replied, feeling guilty for being insensitive. “Just.. You know we worry about you, like a lot. But if you—well, if your opinion on him is changing, fuck, I guess we gotta deal with that.” He assures, a nervous smile on his features as he gauges your response to that.

“Yeah. I—It’s just surprising. Are you gonna tell him soon or…?” Jessica adds on, cautiously treading on her words. Silence comfortably formed between the three of you, finding no need to add on to it. That was until Jess, of course, tries to lighten the mood.

“Alex is so going to burst a blood vessel when he finds out.” Now that made you laugh, a smile over your features now.

“Find out about what?” Alex’s sudden appearance had Jessica scream bloody murder.

—

➻ Confession was not at all difficult, seeing how Billy waited for you to make a move instead—having already learnt from before. Shy confessions aside and with ample support from your friends, Billy accepts. The difference with this confession in comparison to many others, not once did a confession had his heart beating as hard as it did when it came from you.

➻ Billy was smug about the fact that you were now his, wrapping an arm around you. Possessiveness grew in his heart, finding it due to the fact that he had to—in a way—earn your affection. It was also due to the fact that his reputation did not even matter to you, not one bit, with that support system you have with your friends. The longer it took for you to reciprocate his love, the more he fell into the feeling of wanting you even more. 

➻ Now that he had you, he was content. So much so that he began taking his time to progress his relationship with you. He doesn’t want you to be distant with him any more longer, not after all that he had done.

—

“God, Billy.” Stu chuckled at his partner in crime. The two sat at the very end of the library, paper before them as Stu scribbled down code words. ��You really are obsessed, huh?”

“Oh, shut up.” Billy grumbled, tracing his finger on a polaroid photo that he took of you. It was from the sixth date that you had been on since you had gotten together. You were amazing to him, Billy—whilst having his actual thoughts under lock and key—he felt, for a brief moment, that he wouldn’t have been surprised if you were out of his league. You became someone he cared for deeply, he wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Hey, Stu.” Billy quietly spoke after a few minutes of listening to Stu’s busied scribbling.

“Mmm, yeah? What’s up?” Stu responded, still not looking up from his paper.

“You think we can make a few changes to the plan, before executing it?”

Billy’s words had been enough to stop Stu’s from scribbling down anything more.

—

Hello again, I had framed the storyline in which it’s a tad more believable and to how I believe it may work out other than a dagger to the heart by Billy. I hope you enjoyed reading this piece! (: There are few more Billy and Stu requested pieces coming your way, please be on the lookout for them! Please reblog this post, I really appreciate it!! Have a good day/night!! (:

[spc-rambles]

I adore the steelworks gang, like more than I've seen other people express online.

First of all...

My little icon Lexi.

They have been known and initially regarded for their silly voices and jolly nature but I don't often see people looking into why they do it. Like their voices make them more wild than Marion who's generally loved by some fans but they also do it in spite of themselves. They and Theo did an entire upbeat song about how much they are failures to railway engineering with lyrics like:

"We're experiments gone bad

in other words whoever designed us must be mad."

These are not the words of someone with self esteem in how funny they are! They even showed them actually depressed when saying 'We can't do anything.' for the final time in the special.

And anyone who knew how long it took for more in-your-face LGBT+ representation in 2018 She-Ra will know that if this special just came out three or four years later, we might've had proper gender-fluid Lexi representation.

As for Theo...

He is still a pure little bean and I feel the ambiguity of his design makes it all the more reason for him to feel bad about his design. I don't know what about his design warranted gigantic cogs on his sides but we don't know what went on in whatever workshop he was built at. For all we know he could've had the Henry treatment, having been dumped on the doorstep on the first desperate railway executive needed an engine, as a last ditch effort for a dying manufacturer.

As for him being on the spectrum, I can still see it in his behaviour. Lexi was truly not gender fluid but once you've met one autistic person, you've met one autistic person.

And some characteristics are visible in him.

His unintentional bluntness. "Are you being scrapped?"

His tics and stutters.

His shakes in excitement, if you were to count it as stimming.

And who's to say he's not limited to physical disabilities? He and Lexi, depending on how successful you can view it having designs as unique as them on British rails, are the perfect ones to have given the body language they were adamant on giving all the engines back then.

Him being so gentle and anxious is generally adorable, so yeah, not so much to say about his actual personality.

Speaking of not much to say, not much to say on Merlin either, at least nothing that people haven't said already. We all know how awesome he is.

Beresford is MY MAN!

Beresford just wants a friend guys. He said in his own song that he was always ignored by engines who just want to get a job done. No time to chat with him. Loneliness can drive him mad. It is kinda sad that his appearance in Royal Engine was not only a sign of the further appearances these characters could've had but how it was also kinda a rehash of the scene we got in his last appearance, so maybe an episode of his own where he learnt to make friends properly would've been fun.

Ah well, at least he got some friends in another life.

And what can I say about Hurricane?

Keeping it real, working with steel.

Since 1902

He is such a chill guy, that while his companion might've had a lot of hard labour in mind for Thomas, he seems so genuine in wanting to take Thomas in while still acknowledging his terrible position. He could've done with standing up to Frankie though. But whatever, that's meant to be a part of his character, and he was voiced by the chad Jim Howick no less.

It's so funny when people say he sounded like a member of the royal family when he's played kings before.

And then there's Frankie.

Oh my god I adore her so much. Her manipulation being legitimately intimidating at the best times, especially when she's actually chasing Thomas down in the dead of night, her musical style bribing him into working for her, her VA's performance capturing all of her personality through line delivery perfectly.

Everything about her class, her demeanour, most of her lines makes me so curious about her whole life.

How is she running this steelworks better than the human manager of the works if there even is one? How are the human workmen so ok with her doing this? How did the other engines before Thomas get into doing her work? How did they get out? How did Hurricane stay with her for this long, let alone not encourage some potential friends of his to work with her? Was she indirectly responsible for Hurricane surviving as long as he did to still be a tank engine after she was built? Why didn't the railways surrounding this fictional steelworks not agree with this most likely non-existent human manager not just agree to get a lot of their engines to transport steel from their works? What did Frankie do? What are you hiding from us!?

The whole mystery surrounding her and her apparently feeling put-down and apparently not evil at heart according to her character profile and her role in the book 'Delivery at the Docks' makes her potential crimes such a goldmine for story potential that I really want to delve into very soon.

And yeah, that's what I have to say on them in canon. All beautiful characters that I feel need more recognition on a regular basis.