#many years. and i probably wont have that many friends for a little while. and its okay. its time to settle a little bit steadier than i am.

[cinnamon-notes]

leaving the apartment where i lived with my ex turned out to be more painful than her leaving the apartment where we lived together

[in1-nutshell]

IM GETTING EVERY IDEA I GOT OUT WHILE REQUESTS ARE OPEN IM SORRY

also I'm sorry i keep bringing up chaotic teen Buddy and Megatron, but i love seeing this fucker suffer through forced adoption.

I'm still kinda trucking through the comics, but i know that at some point Megatron is essentially yeeted into a whole ass different dimension and spent 300 years there (i could be totally wrong, if so ignore.) long story short, i have been stuck on the idea of Megatron getting stuck there for 300 years, mourning his funny little human child after 80 years, cause he figures even if he does get back home, they wont still be there.

Luckily for everyone involved, that 300 years was just a few months for the lost light. unluckily for everyone.

Buddy - "My father is gone, therefore I am no longer responsible for the consequences of my actions."

Hello again! Don't feel bad for asking/ requesting. Requests are fun to do for me and I can write almost anything someone asks, almost. Still, ask if you want something written. It is time for the return of Fearless Buddy!

Hope you enjoy!

Fearless Buddy reaction to Megatron coming back from the other dimension

SFW, platonic, familial, bit of angst here and there, Human reader

MTMTE/LL

Buddy had conveniently slept when Megatron had left. Don't blame them, they had been running off of little to no sleep for weeks and their body finally had enough.

Rodimus had to break the news for Buddy.

"What do you mean Megatron is 'gone'?!"--Buddy

"He left, he just up and escaped! But don't worry we'll get him back on board in no time."--Rodimus

"He... He really just left?"--Buddy

"I'm afraid so."--Rodimus

"Well, you know what? Who needs him anyways! The big sorry pile of scrap can go rust in space for all I care!"--Buddy

"Buddy--"--Rodimus

"Who needs him! Thanks for letting me know Roddy, really. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some important things to go over with Whirl."--Buddy

"What important things? What could be more important than this right now?"--Rodimus

"We are going to put a bumper sticker on Minimus saying 'Kachinga'!"--Buddy

"... Carry on!"--Rodimus

Rodimus really wishes now that he had stopped Buddy from making it to Whirl's. The ship had become the two's playground for pranks and sillies.

No one was spared from their wrath.

Many bots on board got mad at the two. But it was the bots closest to Buddy to realize something was deeply troubling them.

Their enthusiasm seemed forced most of the time. Their laughter almost seemed... Robotic almost. And their eyes... they looked so hollow and lacked the usual twinkle they had before.

Whirl appointed himself Buddy's guardian in the meantime. There wasn't much argument there as being Buddy's Amica, it was probably for the best.

Whirl lost count of the amount of times he caught Buddy going into Megatron's habsuite and crying over some of his poems. He wants to hurt Megatron so badly for the pain he inflicted on Buddy. They became Rung's most frequently seen patient after talking with Whirl.

"You really think this is going to help?"--Buddy

"I'm sure of it! If Eyebrows here can stand me, then you'll be like a walk in the park!"--Whirl

"... Thanks Whirl. I mean it, you're the best Amica a friend could ask for."--Buddy

"Hey now, don't get soft on me yet. That's Rung's job. Now get in there and punch those feelings in the face!"--Whirl

The day when Megatron comes back after everything is settled Whirl is one of the first in line to deck him across the face.

"You sorry excuse of a tyrant!--"--Whirl

"I know you're upset Whirl... Buddy passing must not have been easy..."--Megatron

"Passing? What are you talking about?"--Whirl

"Surely they have already passed it's been more than 80 years."--Megatron

"Megs, it's been a couple months since your little disappearing act."--Rodimus

"...Is Buddy alive?"--Megatron

"Of course they are! Why--Hey!"--Whirl

Megatron sprinting pass him and to Buddy's habsuite.

Megatron had never sprinted as fast as he did at that moment. For the past 200 or so years he had been in a constant state of mourning. He thought he had lost Buddy forever. The biggest regret he had was not at least telling them good bye.

Now here he was... He almost backed out of knocking on the door, but he did it. The doors opened revealing Buddy in all of their morning glory.

"... Buddy?"--Megatron

"Ah man it's one of those dreams again. Listen fake Megs, I'm not in the mood right now. So if you'll just come back next week that'll be great."--Buddy

Megatron finally snapped out of his dazed and scooped up Buddy into his servos and held them close to his spark.

It took Buddy a solid second to realize this wasn't some fever dream.

"Megs?"--Buddy

"I'm here now. I'm here."--Megatron

"...How... How dare you! YOU LEFT ME HERE ALONE! YOU DON'T JUST CALL SOMEONE THEIR KID THEN LEAVE THEM HIGH AND DRY! WHY DIDN'T YOU TAKE ME?!? OR AT LEAST SAY GOOD BYE!? TELL ME! TELL ME WHY?!? DAD WHY DID... why did you leave me...*--Buddy

"...I am so sorry..."--Megatron

"...you better be... I will never leave your side again... You're worse than a toddler getting lost at a Walmart..."--Buddy

It wasn't an easy transition at first. Buddy had their friends always within arms length from Megatron. Buddy themselves put up some walls to avoid getting hurt again.

The two eventually decided to seek counseling to try and mend their relationship. Thank goodness that happened.

Now Megatron was sitting in his habsuite with Buddy telling him all the latest news on the ship while reviewing their latest poems.

These were the little things he missed most and was glad he had gotten a chance to get them back.

[sincerely-loserboy]

need a creepy antisocial incel roommate soo bad… one who hates my guts cause i wont put out, one who stays in his room all day watching fetishy cuntboy hentai and wishing he could do the same to me.

id tease him a ton, cause out of the two of us, *i’m* the one getting laid, even though I’m, in his words, a “dumbass soy faggot.”

it’d be infuriating for him, having to live with this annoying, low-t pansy who goes out nearly every night, *consistently* gets dates and has tons of friends, while he sits on the computer all day, alone

but all that anger and frustration would build. and he’d eventually snap. maybe i’d come home annoyingly drunk, or i’d knock over one of his sonico figures, or id tease him just one too many times, and he’d have enough.

i wouldnt anticipate him being stronger than me, so he’d be able to catch me off guard, shoving me down onto his bed and pinning me there as months of resentment boil to the surface.

he’d shove my shirt up to look at my tits, saying that if every other guy in town gets to see them, he should, too and that i deserve this for being such an insufferable bitch all the time

i’d try to fight him off, but i’m kind of a twig, and on my back against a guy taller than me, i wouldnt stand a chance. i’d try to intimidate him, but end up saying something stupid. what, hes so pathetically terrible with real chicks that he has to resort to raping his faggy roommate?

that’d get me a slap in the face and a promise of raw sex. he was probably never gonna use a condom in the first place, but my big mouth just sealed my fate. i’m getting bred

he’d shove my pants down and instantly stuff two fingers in my cunt, sneering at me for being wet already. he’d finger me just enough to open up my pussy, and the second i relaxed slightly, he’d shove his cock in, giving me something to *really* stir up my insides

everything would be happening so fast that i’d only be able to make embarrassing moans and whines, brain reeling too much to form words, let alone coherent sentences. he’d just laugh, telling me that i’m pathetic for letting a little cock turn me braindead

he’d fuck me with zero rhythm and zero mercy, just taking what he wants as violently as he can. he’d spit vile things at me, his idea of dirty talk being tainted from years of hentai addiction, but still, shamefully, making me twitch and gush around him.

he’d trace little hearts below my belly button, where my womb would be, practically drooling as he’d say how cute i’d look all bred and defeated. how he was gonna flood my cunt until it was overflowing, how he’d been saving up loads of thick, virile sperm for me, how he knew my juicy little eggs were gonna soak it all up so eagerly, cause that’s what my body was made for. every vile, cumbrained word would make me twitch, a sensation that would only be heightened by his greedy hands on my tits.

he’d force me to cum, both for the humiliation factor of making me enjoy rape, but also because it’d make it more likely that his sperm would take. he’d laugh all the way through my orgasm, and once i was left twitching with aftershocks, he’d thrust deep into me and start unloading rope after rope of potent cum directly against my cervix. it’d be so much that it’d overflow around his cock and pool under me when he pulled out as i lay there, twitching, defeated. he’d snort at how dumb i looked, then snap a picture, saying that i looked straight out of an instant loss 2koma, and though i wouldn’t know what he meant, i’d be humiliated nonetheless

he’d leave me there, not bothering with any cleanup or aftercare, figuring that i’d learned my lesson. and i would, for the most part. i’d be much more docile, not bothering him about housework, not making fun of his social life. but i’d secretly be desperate for more of his cock, until eventually i’d crack and beg him to use me again <333

[thefourthwifeoftengenuzui]

May I please ask for headcanons Aoba Johsai with a manager whose skilled with archery and sharpshooting please

Yes of course! Sorry for the wait I was working on a Rindou piece and my physics exam. It’s like 3Am right now, but I still want to finish this for you boo. Thanks again For requesting Anon, if you like this, don’t forget to like and ask if you have any other ideas. Also, you didn’t specify which you wanted, so this can be interpreted as romantic or platonic. Status: unedited

warnings: crackfic, bad grammar, cursing, violence, oikawa exists, oikawa slander, color coded characters, reader is a whole ass menace, mentions of vaping

🩵🤍Aoba Josai With a Sharpshooter/ Archer Manager🤍🩵

As a Team (platonic)

Oikawa, Iwazumi, Kunimi, Kiyotani, Kindaichi, Matsukawa, you

My first thought when I looked at this post was simple. How many times and we hit oikawa in the head. Everything else kinda spiraled from there. Just imagine being able to do that shit with pinpoint accuracy, and when he turns around to see who did it, be like the gremlin chick from hotel transilivania and be like ,” I didn’t do that”. And then he proceeds to blame Iwa, and pure unrefined chaos erupts from there. *clears throat and sips matcha* good shit

But on a more serious note, these boys are completely ready to take full advantage of your skills. Remember when oikawa sprained his ankle? Guess who had to replicate his serves instead so they could practice receives. That’s right, you. And your aim is a little too good sometimes (Kindiachi has been hit in the face) but they honestly don’t care, they just looking to get practice in, and maybe a few tips here and there for aiming.

But that’s just during their practice. During your archery or other practice. Oh my god. Imagine having like 12 annoying older brothers. Like both Archery and Sharpshooting are pretty quiet sports. But with these mfs at your practice? Oh dear lord. These gon be the most obnoxiously loud humans to walk the planet (3rd only to Fukurodani and Kurasuno). Imagine with me. It’s so silent you can hear a pin drop. You’re trying to concentrate before you’re pulling back your string. You take a deep breath and just as you’re about to let go- “WOOOOOOOO THATS MY LIL SISSSSSS/BROOOO!!!” “SHUT UP SHITTY KAWA!THEY NEED TO FOCAS!” “HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW IWA!?” “YOU WOULD KNOW IF YOU WEREN'T SUCH AN DUMBASS!” “IF YALL DONT SHUT THE FUCK UP ILL SHUT YOU UP MYSELF” yeah they’re THAT kind of sports parents. They got kicked out last time :)

I just know yall have made oikawa put an apple on his head and see if you can hit his head. Ofc you can, but it’s funnier hitting him with the Velcro arrows and watching him rip his hair out, and ruining it for the day (his fangirls hated you for that lol.)

I just KNOW that the other teams got some crazy ass conspiracies about you. They call you the Seijo Assassin, and that you kill the best players of the opposing team, and they never find the bodies. And tbh it was probably oikawa who started it, to get back at you for getting Velcro stuck in his hair. So while you’re just as hot as kiyoko, everyone is terrified of you, and are only referring to you as L/n-sama (even though you’re only a second year.). I swear to fuck hinata pissed himself when tsukki told the team about you.

also yall know the sharpshooter shaving cream balloon prank thingy? I know damn well the whole team is having a competition for who can do it best. Like it’s literally so funny, especially when someone not on the team gets hit. Like I know oikawa has accidentally hit the coach with one of those. Do with this information what you will.

Individuals: Could be romantic or platonic, either way fits (though both are seriously on crack.)

Somehow or someway, Oikawa will convince you to be his bodyguard. And not even like paying you money. Just like a, “ YoU wOnT wALk yOuR pOor dEfEnSLeSS FRiEnD tO cLAss? WhAt iF my FAnGirlS Kidnap MeEEEEE?!” “yep.” “Do you even Love Meeeeeee!?” “Nope.” “…I’ll pay you~” “pay me what?” “Food~” “DONE!” *throws chair out window* yeah y’all’s relationship is pretty much just blitz and stolas in the loo loo land episode. Like when Stolas was just walking while Blitz is pretending to be Batman, lurking in the shadows and pointing a gun at anything with a pulse? Yeah that’s you two walking around the school, except with a nerf gun instead.

oh and you know the team jackets? He bought you yours. But not just any jacket oh no. Yours is special. He payed extra to have it say, “The Seijo Assasin; Oikawa’s bobyguard.” He also might have gotten it in 4xl because he doesn’t know your size, but still wants it to be way to big on you so he can make fun of you. He’s an ass.

Iwazumi is much nicer on the other hand. He (regardless of if it’s platonic or romantic,) is all about helping you carry your stuff. He doesn’t even ask either, he just kinda picks it up and does it. He says it isn’t a big deal, and that you’re carrying enough with your archery equipment anyway, and that he needs the weight training anyway. Def the kinda guy to use your backpack as a dumbbell and use it to lift while y’all in the hall.

I know y'all have a running competition on who can hit oikawa in the head the most. Body shots are one point, head shots are worth 2, and the groin is worth 3, especially if he’s being creepy to someone. The score is currently 34-31, slightly in your favor. Whoever hits him the least by the end of the month has to buy the winner ramen. Oikawa doesn’t approve of this game, and ends up attempting to bump everything back your way. But on the bright side, it’s a good way to scare off his fangirls :).

Kunimi just kinda vibes with you. Like he doesn’t really acknowledge much of what you do, just kinda goes like, “ oh so that’s why you were so good at that. I just thought you hated oikawa. Anyway can I have your Chez-its?” Yeah my boy don’t care enough, but he cute so yeah.

also I just know this mf, plays Fortnite and vapes blue raspberry burst. Do with that what you will. ( to be clear, I wouldn’t ever vape, i just know he does, and honestly had to look up what flavors there are.

The honesty biggest thing you do that impresses him is the whole good aim card slicey thingy. Idk man, he just seems like he would be good at that, and would try to fight you on it.

Despite everything, Kyotani is actually relatively nice to you? Or at least as nice as he can be. His version of nice is avoiding you like the plague, cause he’s scared you’ll be scared of him. He actually really likes you and wants an excuse to talk to you. So what does he do? Asks you to help him aim while spiking, so that he can use his strength more efficiently. He actually is pretty patient with your teaching, and genuinely respects you enough to take your advice. ( tell him to shower pls, I can smell him through the screen, luv him though)

He also uses a whole bottle of axe body spray every time he walks out of the house . Be careful not to get too close to him. Please find someone strong, or stupid enough to bully him out of it, for the sake of the teams lungs🙏

Kindaichi is probably the only person on the team who still calls you Y/n- senpai. He’s way too precious. That being said, he still did give you a twenty if you hit kageyama with a vollyball during warmups. He may be nice, but he mad petty. And $20 is $20 man

Matsukawa is definitely a COD type of guy. He knows a lot about guns. Bond over that (then give me his number pls)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for reading, sorry the last part was rushed, I am just not feeling it rn. If y’all liked this make sure to follow, Like, and request something of your own. I literally have nothing else to do. Love y’all sm, peace

-joden

[itsmebytch001]

y/n sneaking and taking aarons car to learn how to drive bc he wont teach her (with a friend that knows how to) and getting caught? i was thinking earth 42 bc miles probably has a motorcycle to chase them down (bc instead of getting out n getting in trouble they jusr drive off full speed)

(I Love this one)

You and Aaron were in a circle, when you asked him 'Dad can you teach me how to drive?' He would say 'yes' but weeks would pass and you still could not bee trusted behind the wheel, then when you would ask for lessons he would say no, because 'why should I pay for them when I could just teach you?' And when you pressed him to actually teach you, or for Miles too he would hit you with the 'We don't have time to teach you!'

So finally you had enough, enough of waiting for your Dad, or Miles to get off their ass and teach you, so you inlisted the help of Musa, her father had been vigilante on teaching her on driving since he was sick of shoeffering her places, drilling the road code into her like a second langue, and now that both Aaron and Miles had left the house, and the car you called her up for assistance.

Calling Musa Harada...

ring

ring

Musa: "hey"

Y/n: "Hi hi...so you know how you can drive?"

Mus: "Just about, yeah why you need going some place?"

Y/n: "No, not yet anyways I was just wondering if you'd be willing to teach me"

Musa: "Can't, Dad's off on buisnesse and took the car"

Y/n: " What about my Dad's car?"

Musa: "Your Dad's car?"

Y/n: "Yeah, who else?"

Musa: "Knowing how your Dad dotes that thing? If we took it out and even got one scratch I think he'd kill us both!"

Y/n: "Yeah...But if your even a half decent teaching I won't get any scratches and all will be fine!"

Musa: " But what if I'm a bad teacher and we crash?"

Y/n: "Are you a bad teacher?"

Musa: "I don't know Iv'e never teached anyone how to drive"

Y/n: "Well now's your chance!"

Musa: "...What's in it for me?"

Y/n: "$250 and Egyptian leftovers!"

Musa: "I'll be over in a hour!"

End of call...

And just as she said Musa was over by your window in a hour, letting her in as her long black hair whisked past your face she asked you...

Musa: "Where are my leftovers?"

Y/n: "In the kitchen damm"

So while Musa stuffed her face and her pockets while you sat beside her on the coach.

Musa: "So how are we getting in your Dad's car?"

You pulled out the shiny key and dangled it in front of her.

Y/n: "Swiped his keys"

Musa: "And he didn't notice? Odd"

Y/n: "I know right? I thought for sure he was gonna catch me but his mind's been else where"

Musa: "Why donsen't your Dad teach you?"

Y/n: "He keeps saying he will but I know he won't, it's a mix of him being busy, and not wanting to admit to himself I'm not a child"

Musa: "Look at you, little therapist"

Y/n: "I know right? You finished with your food?"

Musa: "yeah" She said wiping her lip and dusting herself off as you both made your way out the house and down the fire escape and into the neighbouring ally where at the end of the alley under a rouge tarp was Aarons vintage black Cadillac, his pride and joy after you of course that he had imported from Cuba that he had worked on and off for the past however many years.

Musa: "You sure you wanna do this?"

Y/n: "...Yeah"

Musa: "That sounded very unsure..." she said hands on hips and eye brow raised.

Y/n: "Yeah Yeah whatever"

And once you and Musa got into the car, turned on the engine and pulled out the alley she softly instructed you to press on the accelerator, only for the car to jolt forward once, stop entirley and then start again, only now it took over itself, speeding down the road at 70 an hour.

Musa: "TAKE YOUR FOOT OF THE FUCKING GAS!"

But your foot was already off the gas, your hands weren't even on the wheel but still car kept going straight so fast everything seemed a blur.

Y/n: "I HAVE!!" Musa looked over to see your feet weren't anywhere near the gas pedal.

Musa: "HIT THE BREAKS! HIT THE BREAKS!"

But once you did the car simply kept going, faster and faster with Musa leaning over and swerving the wheel to avoid civillians both of you screaming hysterically as the car took a life of it's own only for Musa to take the wheel to avoid ant fatality's.

Musa: "MOVE!!" She screamed as she swerved the car out of the way of an old woman slowly being shuffled across the road, the war drifts around her while Musa pushes her legs in front of your's to try and stop the car pressing on the breaks only for it to keep going, pressing on the horn again and again to ward people off while you were squished into the window making room for Musa.

Needless to say your reckless driving caught the attention of the Police, you saw their red and blue lights in the side view mirrors and growingly large cars come closer as they sped closer. You heard there groaning siren and the sound of speaker came on.

PD NY Pull Over!!

Musa: "WERE TRYING!!" She screamed out the window obvioulsy not being heard as they continued to chase.

As the car made it's way down road and down under the bridge Musa while trying to avoid people had stuck several other cars thankfully not seriously hurting anyone.

Y/n: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

Musa: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS CAR?!" She yelled pressing the break again and again while looking down at her feet.

Y/n: "Musa! Watch out!" Musa looked up to see she was around drive off a ten foot drop, but instead swerved the car into a bridge piller, finally bringing it to a stop, the air bags kick in while you both slammed your heads into the air cushions.

PD NY COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!

And so, while both concussed and deeply shaken you emergred from the reck alive and with your hands up...

While you and Musa sat in jail with ice packs for your swollen heads you apologized again and again to her for almost killing you both with Aarons strange car, you requested a phone call, meanwhile Aaron had just gotten home.

He opened the door where he would usually see you on the couch, or in your room but the house was empty, he called out for you.

Aaron: "Y/n...Ay Y/n you home...?" Only to be met with nothing.

ring

ring

Aaron picked up the phone with no caller id.

You are reciving a call from PDNY Brooklyn's 99th brough holding center from 'Y/n Davis' Press one to answer..

Y/n: "Da-"

Aaron: "What have you done?"

Y/n: "Hiiii Dad...So you know how you wouldn't teach me to drive?"

Aaron: "Jesus christ Y/n..."

Y/n: "So me and Mus-"

Musa poked you in the back.

Musa: "Don't drag me into this"

Y/n: "But you were there!"

Musa: "This is your fault!"

Y/n: "Yeah yeah" You turned away from Musa and back to the phone.

Y/n: "Uhhh, So We took out the car..."

Aaron: "As in My Cadillac?"

Y/n: "Yeah...and we might have, I might have crashed it into a bridge pillar"

Aaron: "WHAT?! I..I Oh My God, are you okay, is Musa okay?"

Y/n: "Yeah were oka-"

Aaron: "Than WHAT were you THINKING?! You took out my car and crashed it? Did you break in?!!"

Y/n: "Nooo...I swiped your keys"

Aaron: "Oh my God...Y/n why WHY would you do that?! "

Y/n: "It's not my fault it crashed, it literally would not stop going!"

Aaron: "Y/n...I don't DRIVE that car because THE BREAKS DO NOT WORK!"

Y/n: "Yeah I figured that out! Why do you still have it?!"

Aaron: "FOR COLLECTION!"

Y/n: "Why would you collect a car?"

Aaron: "Where is it now?"

Y/n: "what?"

Aaron: "The CAR!"

Y/n: "Oh uh...I think it's been in pounded"

Aaron: "Oh My God...Oh my god Y/n I can't with you right now-"

Y/n: "But Da-"

Call ended

Musa: "So?"

Y/n: "He hanged up!"

Musa: "He hanged up?! So were stuck here?"

Y/n: "Yep"

Musa: "Oh my GOD!"

So for around half a hour later while you and Musa sat misreablley in the holding center the door opened for a police officer to reveal themselves.

Y/n Davis and Musa Harada?

Musa: "Yeah?"

Y/n: "Yeah?"

Your bail's been paid your free to go...

As so while you and Musa exited the holding cell you saw Miles leaning against the wall all none chalant.

Y/n: "MILES! Thank you SOSO much your paying our bail!"

Miles: "I didn't, Your Dad did, sent me to come get you, I think it's best if you stay at mine Y/n your Dad is pissed, Musa come on I'll drop you home"

Musa: "Oh...thanks Miles!"

Requets are open!

[fairycosmos]

I'm sorry to do this bc I know you get so many ppl venting and you have your own shit to deal with and yet ppl on here constantly implicitly ask you to console them which is incredibly emotionally labour intensive. However all that being said. I found out my cat who is 9 but is very young looking and active and shows no sign of pain or suffering has large cell lymphoma (general prognosis 6-9 months) and I'm literally broken. She's my best friend. I've been through years where I've had no friends but I've always had her and she's everything to me and I've known a lot of cats who live to late teens so I had expected that for her and this has come out of nowhere and is just so soul destroying because she is my whole world and I love her so so much. she's literally saved my life (have been at the point of kms so many times but didn't for her) and now she probably wont be here next year and I don't know how to keep existing without her and I didn't know who else to tell. I really appreciate your kind and honest presence on this site it's very cleansing and healing and ik this is a parasocial thing to say/feel but you are like a friend to so many. so thanks. even just having a space to say this stuff is invaluable. You have helped and comforted and offered love and insight to so many people despite your own suffering. Much love to you, I hope the universe treats you with lots of kindness going forward.

i am so so sorry to hear this - sometimes i honestly can't believe how cruel life can be. i wish there was something tangible i could say that would make a change to what you're feeling but my experience with grief (all types of grief esp preemptive grief like what you're dealing with) has proven to me that words often ring hollow when you're going through it. i do want to offer some understanding and some comfort despite that, i just know it may be hard for you to register right now and that's alright. losing a pet is so so deeply painful and it's completely normal to be devastated and taken aback by this news - anyone would be. at the same time it sounds like your cat is deeply lucky to have you and to be loved so completely by someone. while what you're both going through is horrific, i am so glad she has you to take care of her and that she ended up having a wonderful life with you - the gift you have given her and continue to give her every day just by being her owner is huge and i hope you continue to remind yourself that as you confront there next few months. she is warm and fed and taken care of and she has the best chance of living longer with her condition bc of the care and love you continue to show her. i know this is much much easier said than done but please try to take it one day at a time and make every moment count with her - it's easy to get lost in the idea of losing her but she is still here and you still have time together, albeit not as much time as you both deserve. i can't stand how much of a gamble of luck everything seems to be and how horrible things happen to ppl and animals who truly deserve so much more - that anger, despair and incredulity still hits me day after day and i feel it very hard on your behalf rn. you have every right in the world to process that sense of feeling like your soul has been destroyed on whatever timeline works for you. as long as you continue to move forward, hour to hour or minute to minute despite it all.

are you able to talk to any friends/family about this? i only ask bc pet loss is one of the hardest things in the world to go through and i think having some sort of super system could make the days feel a little more manageable. if not, please feel free to message me and share updates, stories, vents etc about your cat and how you're doing - i lost my childhood dog a few yrs back and i do understand. it's such a heavy feeling to carry around with you all the time. i would also recommend joining a pet loss support group as another option too, bc so so many people sadly completely get what youre going through. i hope your little girl is doing OK today and that you are taking care of yourself as much as you feel able to as you process this news. if you need to break down, go to sleep, scream, punch pillows, be numb - that's alright. there's no wrong way to react to this. i just hope you give yourself some grace as you do. sending so so much love to you both - and thank you so much for the insanely kind words by the way. you didn't have to say that and it really made my night better that you did. so sorry you're in this position. X

[cosmo-watches-movies]

Wilde (1997)

Triggerwarning: Homophobia, Sex (in the movie, not depicted in this blogpost)

Plot: A part of Oscar Wilde’s life story.

Spoilers beyond this

Michael plays Robbie Ross, a good friend to Oscar Wilde and, delicately put, his first male lover.

Following are my incoherent thoughts as I was watching the movie: (some gifs for context, for the other parts watch the movie and you'll get it)

starting out chill with Oscar meeting his future wife

oh who might this dashing young fella be?

lol that didn’t work did it?

Nevermind it did work

I was so not prepared for this

This guy has a lot of thoughts in his head and none of them are holy

Bitch what

If someone looked at me like that I’d instantly fall for them too. Man brought his A-Game

Oh my god this is going too fast even for me and I’m just watching

Why would you give him lines like that?

(I refuse to clip the next part, I don't know who might read this)

What in the what I barely got into the movie, why would you do this to me

I have questions

I have so many emotions at once right now I actually feel a bit sick

I’m 16 Minutes in and my heart is breaking at the thought of where this might be going

Okay, I got used to the fact that I am actually watching a movie about gay men

Me watching a movie about a gay author: （☆ω☆ ）

Me when theres actual portayal of intimacy between men: （○ □ ○ ）

I swear I’m so normal about this.

Wtf Oscar why would you drop Robbie like that. I get that this was an affair, but like this? He picked that other guy up like an apple from a tree.

Watch Robbie take this like the king he is

Oscar met yet another guy (Bosie) and seems to fall in love with him and guy #2 litterally wants to khs and/or Bosie, while Robbie has only respect, acceptance and love to give.

lol taste of your own medicie, huh?

I hate Bosie

I love Robbie

Drama between Bosie and Wilde, which results in Oscar being sentenced to two years in prison

Oof that speech Oscar held in court tho, right in the feels

Robbie is an absolute treasure of a person. Get yourself a man like him. Don’t settle for less.

Wtf all this stress and heartbreak for Oscar and Bosie to break up after three months, the world is a cruel place

- End of incoherent thoughts-

That was heartbreaking in so many ways. The main story obviously is unbelievably tragic but we shall focus on other things. There are a lot of strong performances in this movie, the whole cast was quite good. You can strongly feel the love Robbie has for Oscar, he has this soft tone when he talks to or about him, he wants him to be happy even if it means that he himself wont be. He accepts that Oscar doesn’t love him the same way and still supports his friend under any circumstances. It's not just in the dialouge, it's also in the way Robbie talks to and looks at Oscar. He’s pure kindness, love and devotion.

He cares so much for him it's breaking my poor little heart :c

On a less serious note, my guy really went ahead and had his first on-screen kiss be a gay kiss!?! Fuckin hell! And he did so well! Icon, king, legend, right from the start!

Because there aren't enough gifs in this already, have some more little moments I enjoyed :3

✨Puppy dog eyes✨

Good save xD

Why would you hold it like that?

I don't even know why, just thought he looked dashing in this scene

Me too, Robbie, me too.

I probably could've written more, but that wouldn't do the movie and characters justice. Bosie's full brattiness alone is something I couldn't even capture in gifs. Kudos to Jude Law, he really made me hate that character. He's the exact opposite of Robbie. They had only two scenes together I think, but it's awesome to see their personalities clash.

I’d say you should check this movie out, especially if you’re lgbt+ yourself obviously. And then go ahead and read Oscar Wildes works, they're queer history and in general important literature anyone should know.

At the end of this I have learned that I, in fact, don’t hate love drama, I just like it if it's gay. And preferably has a certain actor in it.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

still thinking about yaz travelling with 10 so heres what i have so far:

she runs into him in london coming out of an interview for unit or smth, a couple of months after potd. for him it's in the gap between waters of mars and end of time. hes So Messed Up and yaz is like oh i know this. this is familiar. this might not be my doctor but,,,,this is my doctor

hes like oh what year is this? i was aiming for- and shes like dont ask me i keep getting it mixed up too. and hes like thats a bit of a strange thing to say, do we know each other? you seem familiar. shes like yes we've met

she surmises he doesnt have company bc hes all high on ginger and not trying to hide it. then shes like youre not flying like this, can i take you anywhere bc this is a fucking tardis and a fucking doctor available to her and how many more times is she gonna get this opportunity? never? once, and she has to wait for it 40 more years? no way is she just gonna walk past and go home. shes gonna do what shes always done and buy herself a little more time

she lets herself into the tardis, too sure of herself for him to really do anything abt it, as she asks "where did you say you were going?" he closes the doors "eternity"

"eternity?" she looks at him "is that a euphemism"

"it's a planet. in the larger magellanic cloud. thought maybe i should check up. sorry but who are you, exactly?"

shes like yes. um. yasmin khan. im a friend. as she stares at the tardis in wonder like the first time she walked in. and the tardis lights up bc she doesnt care about linear time and she loves yaz. so yaz starts putting in coordinates. she has to search for some of the controls bc the console is different but it's not too bad

"well thats great to hear, yasmin khan. can never have enough of those"

"larger magellanic cloud" she says looking at the navigation on one of the screens. "dyou ever think it's maybe a bit weird to name things in space after colonists?"

"well depends whos doing the naming. we dont call it that"

"no? what do timelords call it"

"and seeing as it were human colonists who settled there, maybe the name fits"

"there goes my faith in humanity" and she pulls the takeoff lever

the flight is bumpy as ever and when muscle memory fails her three times in a row shes like oh my god WHERE is your conceptual geometer and instead of pointing it out to her he just walks over and adjusts it and the way he does it is so familiar she has to blink hard a couple times

they might or might not end up on eternity but they certainly run promptly into trouble. yaz is a bit mysterious to him, a bit suspicious maybe because she wont answer any question directly but shes able to anticipate him so well that teamwork is pretty much seamless and theyre both running away from something so their motives line up and their need for something fun and exciting and distracting to happen too and also hes lonely and despite the way she basically hijacked his tardis he likes yaz bc of course he does

they match up timelines while hiding from guards, whispering about 1969 and weeping angels and "oh THATS why i dont remember, two doctors in the same place same time" and he figures out yaz travelled with future him

yaz drops a "she" and hes like "she??" and shes like oh shit should i not have said that and hes like no it's fine. and then hes like "does it suit me?" and she does Not manage to blink the tears away at that one

"is it something i said?" and then the guards spot them and hes like "RUN"

the ease with which he takes her hand as they run is lovely and horrible at the same time. she lets herself be dragged along while she thinks about the way 13 shook them off almost any time any of them touched her

a week & 8 planets in and shes been held by him more than shes been held by 13

they become buddies in like the way that you can sometimes become buddies with the younger sibling of your best friend or something. hes probably too heartbroken and messed up to develop a real crush but it's still yaz right? you know the way 10 kisses claras hand in the day of the doctor? that vibe. and yaz, with the benefit of.........foresight? hindforesight? picks up that vibe here that she couldnt with 13. bc 10 is young and a fountain of emotion compared to 13

my yaz is pretty firmly a lesbian so even if she was gonna get over the like very recent heartbreak and younger sibling vibes then still nothing was gonna happen here but theyre also both not in a place where they could cope with another heartbreak like that so like,,,,,,they both know, and they both know that they both know, but they dont need anything more so it just kinda makes them better buddies. sometimes youre a little bit in love with your friend in a way you dont want to act on. just another thing to bond over

and for yaz it's maybe a little bit healing to get 10s adoration like that

at some point the fact of meeting in the wrong order also comes up of course. yaz is like it's a little bit complicated, i dont know what i can say and 10 is like meh follow your instincts, youve got good ones i can tell. and if theres really something you shouldnt say i'll stop you

yaz is like does that happen a lot, as a time traveller i mean, meeting people in the wrong order? and 10 is like [THINKING ABOUT RIVER] "from time to time"

i just think theres a lot of potential for fun with the two of them. both of them running from the inevitable. not wanting to lose who they are, wanting more time as this version of themselves

yaz will learn so much about the doctor that retroactively contextualises a lot of 13, which i think could help in getting a little bit of closure. and theres so much river echoes sort of going in both ways. yaz flying the tardis with 10 because she learnt with 13, river later flying with 11

i also think seeing the way 10 is about his principles compared to how 13 was would be interesting. she would see a lot of the ways the doctor has grown up. yaz got to see so much of 12 in 13s trauma but she never got to see how 12 learnt and grew to become the 13 she loved. i think it would be special to see 10. see how they used to be. and also slap him on the fingers sometimes when he needs it

i dont know how to end it yet because that will just be more tragedy. 10 still ends up in end of time. yaz still ends up home. but maybe they can help each other a little bit in the time inbetween, even if the end theyre running from still comes to them both

[takobaki]

𓆩♡𓆪 Snowy innocence 𓆩♡𓆪 // PT: 3

彡Like a kid in a candy shop彡

˗ˏˋSams shop´ˎ˗

A/N: So this one has a bit of Alkni's backstory or well the events leading up to her being transported to NRC lol, also Ik what imp means just in case lmao

Fun fact Alkni's name is pronounced Alk-e even though that isn't the actual way to say the name

Word count:

WARNING:

Other parts here

"Welcome to Mister S's Mystery Shop! My friends on the other side tell me you came here looking for something. Ee hee hee!" Sam said as he waved to the the Octavinelle students, a warm and welcoming smile on his face "Oh- Whose that little imp!" Same asked as he pointed to Alkni, who only buried her face into Floyds neck, trembling slightly

"That's what we're hoping you would tell us" Azul said as he grabbed Alkni, setting her on the ground. "Do you think you could get your friends on the other side to help us find out" He continued while gently rubbing the 5 year old girls head. Sam let out a hum as he nodded, before turning to Alkni with a smile "Of course I can, my store will meet anyone's needs! Now little imp, what's your name" Sam asked as he slightly bent down to look at the little girl, before turning around to grab her a octopus shaped lollipop

Alkni happily took the candy from him, quickly popping it in her mouth as Sam let out a quiet chuckle. "A...Alk...n..i" The 5 year old girl spoke as she grabbed Azul's pant leg, still slightly weary of Sam

"How are we supposed to even feed that- that- kid if we cant even feed ourselves!?" Yelled the woman, venom lacing her tone as she slammed her fists against the creaky wooden table "Just throw her out again. She'll probably find some way to eat and maybe someone will take her so we don't have to deal with her" The light haired male said as he leaned back, his head resting against the wall as he picked at his teeth. Alkni flinched hard as she peeked through the door leading into the room they were talking in, as tears grew in her eyes. Quickly wiping her tears with her scarred fist, she quietly went to find even the smallest bits of food so she wouldn't have to go hungry for as long as she currently has

Sitting on the cold ground, the little hugged her knees close to her chest as she listened to the people happily chatting with one and another, completely obvious to the child left all alone again. Pushing herself up with the help of the wall, she peeked over the corner of her hiding place, hoping to find maybe a food vendor or a new shop that might've opened. Taking a step out, she reluctantly walked over to the bakery since there where no such things that she had hoped for, while silently begging that the owner would maybe allow her to get something this one time Peeking in through the large windows, she saw that there seemed to be a new person working there, making her eyes light up in hope. Yet all that hope went down the drain as she felt a hand grip her arm tightly. "What did I tell you about trying to steal from my shop. How many times do I need to kick you out for you to understand that you. aren't. getting, Anything" The owner hissed, his tone full of venom as he glared at the small girl, making her winch as turned her head away. The man clearly didn't know of her situation as if he did, he may have been nicer- or not. Dragging her harshly through the streets, he turned a corner, appearing in a rather messy alleyway, pieces of glass and cardboard littering the floor, as he tossed her down harshly onto the dirty floor, causing pieces of glass to cut her skin. "If you ever come back again to my shop, I wont hesitate to call the police on you like I should've done awhile ago" The man hissed before walking away Alkni attempted to push herself up, her hands trembling as they got nicked on the small shards of glass, making her let out quiet yelps. As the extremely small childs stomach let out a rumble, she sat against the wall of a building, tears filling her eyes as she let out a quiet sob while she wrapped her arms around her stomach in a attempt to quiet the rumbling. After sitting there for longer then she thought, she felt drops of rain hit against her pale skin, making her flinch as she snapped out of her zombie like trance. Alkni let out a quiet yawn as she looked up to the sky as the rain rewet her dried tears Gathering pieces of cardboard she attempted to form them into the shape of a bed, just wanting to go to sleep and wake up from the nightmare she was forced to live in, even if it was impossible

Alkni was sat on the counter, swinging her legs back and forth as she slowly chewed on her lollipop that Sam had given her. Sam stared at the little girl, as he thought about what his friends from the other side had told him about her, and what she had gone through. Walking over to her, he bent down to meet her eye to eye, as he gave her a warm smile in a attempt to comfort her.

"Do you see anything that you would like little imp, " Sam asked Alkni with a warm smile as he gently rubbed her head "I'm sure you will be able to find something you like!" He continued as he gestured around the store.

Alkni looked at him surprised for a moment as if she was asking as if he was serious, making the shop owner let out a chuckle as he nodded "Whatever you want" Sam confirmed as he picked her up, before setting her on the floor

As Alkni was looking through the store, albeit wearily, Sam went over to the three Octavinelle students, using the fact that she was focused on something else to explain to the three boys about what had happened to her

As Sam was finishing up speaking with Azul, Jade, and Floyd, he felt a small tug at his pants leg, and upon looking down, he saw Alkni holding a bread shaped stuffed animal, Alkni thinking that it was actual food instead of a toy. "You want that little imp? Well then its all yours" Sam exclaimed with a warm smile as he gently ruffed her messy dusty black hair.

Standing up, Sam looked towards the students again, his gaze slightly darker then usual. "Be careful with them" Sam spoke to them as he crossed his arms ocer his chest, before looking down at Alkni with a warm smile, only to see her trying to eat the bread shaped stuffed animal, making him cover his mouth in a attempt to cover a chuckle

[gin-juice-tonic]

he does still lose his mind- I talked (a little) about it first in this post.

Ford is always looking for away to reverse the effects of the memory gun, but he doesnt really make any headway on it over 30 years.

He tries to help him out with his life too but

McGucket wont really have it. He doesnt remember who Ford is at all, but he’s got like an instinctual fear of him for a while.

Ford does get around this a little by helping him “from the shadows” so to speak. This is usually done by duct taping basic necessities to animals and just letting him find them.

After years of practice he’s found this works best with raccoons. Ford probably even inadvertently introduced McGucket to his ‘wife’ this way. Fiddleford’s fear of ford does eventually fade over time, to the point that he will willingly talk to/be around Ford again. But Ford tries not to talk to him, as he worries he might end up setting McGucket off again/making his mental state worse. In fact he does his best to outright avoid him in general

Also I imagine over the course of 30 years Ford has spent many occasions secretly taking down McGuckets evil robots

While he’s not happy his old friend would so easily attack the town, these instances do give him hope that Fiddleford isn’t entirely gone, and that things can still be fixed.

[cozylittleartblog]

Oop, hello there! ^^ I remember you from DA, still think your art is so cool!! Still fond of the vintage characters and the world of Tessa n' Val! I'm currently testing the waters on Tumblr lol, hoping to get around a different vibe for documenting my projects n' chatting about stuff I like, and wanted to ask: as someone who's been on Tumblr for a while, what are your main tips for a starting artist in the platform? Wish ya a great day! Stay artful n' creative :]

HI!!!! i remember you too, i always get really excited when artists i like come here. tumblr is the only website i really use for myself and not just to post art, so it means i get to follow them and interact with their art 🥺 i ditched deviantart for everything that isn't posting art and bitching about the website via status updates lmfao, the new inbox and watched deviants tabs are so... out of the way and counter intuitive. hate it there.

anyway, I've written a general tumblr how-to post because there's been so many exoduses (exodi??) from other platforms over the last few years, but I don't think I've ever written one for artists? or at least I can't find it if I did. so here are some hot tips 😎👉👉

NUMBER ONE BIGGEST RULE: if you're an artist and you want to actively gain a following and curate your art, please have a separate art blog where you post exclusively or near exclusively art. it's ok to reblog a post here or there, but tumblr is a website About curating and having specific blogs! it's not that people don't want to see or hear about the artist behind the work, but they don't want 43289 unrelated memes and posts for fandoms they're not in 😅 admittedly i have skipped following some good artists here because their reblogs completely drown out their art and clog my dashboard. people really like curated blogs, almost every artist has a separate art blog 'round these parts. (it's completely fine to post WIPs and text posts discussing your art too, some people would like to see your process!)

speaking of curating: tags are your best friend! tumblr tracks the first 20 tags I believe, so use the first 20 tags to add your important search terms. this is where you put anything you'd want to turn up in the search. really you probably wont have more than 10 of these tags. after that you are welcome to ramble in the tags or use organizational tags for your specific blog.

not sure how to tag? search up what terms you'd use to try to find your own post if you were someone else, and see what tags popular posts in that tag used. you should ALWAYS use the #art and #artists on tumblr tags, as well as any relevant common trigger/content warning tags :D here's how i do it:

FOR FANDOM POSTS: where applicable, I tag Fandom, Fandom Acronym, Featured Characters, Featured Ships, and sometimes #[fandom] fanart and/or #[fandom acronym] fanart. FOR ORIGINAL POSTS: you can tag your art medium (digital art, traditional art, sculpting, etc), the general aesthetic or themes, time periods, and if it features your OCs you can use #oc and their names so if people want to see all your OC content they can find it. admittedly i mostly post fanart so i am very spontaneous with the tags i use on my original art posts lol

4. shorter captions seem to be preferred by the masses, I personally either dump my extra comments in the tags of the original post or I'll put them under a cut. unless it's extremely relevant to the post, like explaining ideas or headcanons

5. have all your handy links in your bio! you can use basic HTML coding to insert links with text and put in line breaks. you should have links to other socials (or something like a carrd that links them for you) and your support streams, like shops and tip jars and patreons. and ofc a little about you and what people can expect to see you draw!

6. have your inbox open! you don't have to take requests, but sometimes someone will throw a brilliant idea at you that you may Coincidentally be inclined to draw. it's also just fun to interact with people who like what you do! sweet comments go a long way

7. last one i can think of - do a seIf-reblog at some point in the day. people live in different timezones and not everybody finishes their dashboard. personally I schedule posts for 12 pm cst and then one seIf-reblog at 8 pm cst. it's also okay to reblog your older artworks for new followers to see, especially if you haven't posted in a while. TV airs re-runs and so can you B)

hope some of it helps!

[burntblueberrywaffles]

Fic tag game

got tagged by @fangeek-girl ❤️❤️

How many works do you have on Ao3?

I have 7 works but 3 of them are fanfic lol

2. What's your Ao3 word count?

1896 words total. Your girl is definitely one for brevity LOL

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Wednesday, that one drabble I made for The Man Who Killed Don Quixote, and I've been writing for Star Wars (though I haven't posted anything yet) and Mrs maisel (i wrote a whole short fic for that almost a year ago but I forgot about it completely until I found it in my notes apps, I should get around to posting it)  

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I don't have 5 fics total but here's my current count in order:

1-Lies

2-The world's a little blurry

3-Pretend

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes always! the fact that people are READING my stuff and taking time to comment has me 🥺🥺🥺

My writing ao3 isnt linked to my main email adress though so sometimes it takes me a while to respond because I wont see it until I periodically check my fic stats

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

.....Probably The world's a little blurry let's be real (I'm going to fix it it in the next one in the series, I promise!!!)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

akdadhjgsjgd hard to say all my shit is angsty, I guess Pretend?? kind of, it's less of a downer than the other ones. The final part of Come a little closer will have a happy ending though I promise! (already finished writing the end, I just need to write the beginning lol)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No ❤️ I don't think any of my stuff has gotten enough attention for that lol

9. Do you write smut? What kind?

NO my ace ass has no experience with that so I wouldn't know how 🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️(I might need to in some future project, fortunately a lot of my friends are perverts (affectionate) so I could probably ask for some guidance if it comes to that LOL)

10. Do you write cross-overs?

No, I'm not a big fans of crossovers in general so certainly have never felt compelled to write one.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

12. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

No

13. What WIP you would like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

So many ugh I cant even choose, it's more rare for me to actually finish something than the opposite, that's why I'll never post anything unless the whole thing is finished (only exception is my current series, but that's because I felt like each fic making up the series were self-contained enough that they didn't need to follow up immediatly to work? if that makes sense - plus the first one was a one shot and only thought of how to follow it up after posting it)

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

ANIDALA MY BELOVED

15. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm really good at imagery and emotion (being a poetry writer goes brrrrr)

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

DESCRIPTIONS oh god I'm so bad at it. My fic are vibes only lmao, what are they wearing? where are they? what movements are they doing? NOT IMPORTANT how about I offer you 12 metaphors on how this character is feeling instead. (though I'm forcing myself to work on it haha)

I also struggle with any longer story arc... there's a reason all my stuff is so short lol

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If it's in french it would be pretty fun since it's my ✨first language✨ hehe. For other languages I'd see if one of my friends speak it but otherwise idk if I'd include it bc I don't want to butcher another language, I've seen too many english authors put french through the ringer it's painful 😭

18. First fandom you wrote for?

I guess Julie and the Phantoms? I never posted it but I had a pretty advanced fic for that. unless you count the 13 reasons why fic I posted on wattpas when i was early teen but we dont talk about that

19. Favourite fic you've ever written?

right now it has to be The world's a little blurry, I just love how it came out hehe

20. What fic would you want to rewrite one day?

none right now.

Anyway tagging @nonamemanga @beri-allen @unlifeira @realmermaid333 @suchaladyy @witchysith @king-crimson-works @theycallme-thejackal and anyone else who might want to do it!

[forgetmynamepleasethanks]

OHOHOH I have a good idea for a request :> possibly could I get either headcanons or a scenario, you can choose, of Kris with a reader who had a simular kind of incident to the one Mae Borowski had in NITW? (if you don't know what that is its p easy to search it up there's a whole wiki page for it) hope that made sense!!!!

This has been sitting in my asks for so many months along with a few other posts. I wont lie to you. I forgot my password. Fixed that issue though so here we are. I'm writing this little preamble thing December 10th 2022 so lets see how long it takes me to write this whole thing. Hope you enjoy.

-----

Wise parents in Hometown warn their kids to stay away from them.

Kids too little to even remember why they're supposed to be scared scurry off and kids old enough to remember keep their heads down and walk past them.

The outburst of the only other human in town and the disappearance of Dess Holiday has got to be one of the worst "coincidences" to grace Hometown newspapers ever.

For a while after the incident, you tried your best to recoup your losses. But no matter how hard you seemed to try, no one was interested in humoring your request to be friends anymore.

For 2 years this continued.

To the rest of Hometown you weren't a human, or a monster, but you were a monster. You were a perfect example of why they didn't let many humans live here. A psycho who brutalizes innocent monsters.

That's all you were to them.

You tried to get over it. Can't keep beating yourself up forever right? Time to move on to better things? Right? Your grades began to drop rapidly, bringing you from 3rd in the class to almost last place.

Despite everything, you kept going.

Kris did not understand you. They are one of the very few people who aren't scared of you. They feel for you, as a fellow outcast they get what it's like to just want to curl up in a ball and never leave your bed.

After everything that happened to them, all the yelling, being treated as an outcast, the weird looks, the loneliness, why wouldn't they want to just disappear?

You don't really talk to anyone, sometimes you'll ask them for a pencil but other than that it's effectively radio silence between you and the rest of Hometown.

You rarely smiled, you were rarely seen outside of school or your house, even seeing you at school became a more and more special encounter. You were almost like a secret boss in a video game or something.

You captured Kris' attention and never let go. Why couldn't they stop thinking about you?

"Well that's easy, you have a crush loser." Susie replied to them, throwing another rock into the lake.

Kris didn't believe a word of it.

A crush?

On you?

No way.

No wayyyyy.

Yes way?

I mean just because they thought your smile was so infectious that whenever you wave at them for a pencil they smile, or how even though they know what you did they can't get your face out of their head, or how no matter what you wear you look perfect doesn't mean they have a crush on you!

You probably wouldn't even like them back...

Only one way to find out right?

The sun was setting, signaling for all the other kids to leave the playground and start heading home. Except you. You decided to stay a little longer. Feet brushing through brown mulch below the swing you gently rocked yourself on, hands wrapped around your journal, you heard the sound of footsteps on grass. You glanced up, focusing on the approaching figure which had sat on the swing next to you.

Kris Dreemurr.

After several minutes of uncomfortable silence, Kris broke it.

"I don't think you're a bad person." Kris stated quietly looking to you for your reaction.

"Gee thanks." You said, a little confused with the whole interaction.

"Why don't you come to school anymore?" Kris asked you.

"Why do you care all of a sudden?" You teased, stretching your arms and yawning.

For you, this was just some chance interaction, but for Kris this was now or never.

"Because I miss you." Kris explained quietly.

You froze for a second. Kris missed you? Town crazy person? Wow.

You grinned that crooked grin that Kris couldn't get enough of, before replying.

"Well if you care so much I guess I can show up some more." You proclaimed through your smile.

"I'd like that." Kris said, so quietly you barely heard them.

You stood up from your swing and yawned again. "It's getting late, let me walk you home." You offered.

Kris only nodded before standing up and dusting their pants off. Before they could react you had grabbed their hand and were pulling them along.

Oh.

Oh.

So you did like them back. Would have

Wise parents in Hometown warn their kids to stay away from them.

Kids too little to even remember why they're supposed to be scared scurry off and kids old enough to remember keep their heads down and walk past them.

The outburst of the only other human in town and the disappearance of Dess Holiday has got to be one of the worst "coincidences" to grace Hometown newspapers ever.

For a while after the incident, you tried your best to recoup your losses. But no matter how hard you seemed to try, no one was interested in humoring your request to be friends anymore.

For 2 years this continued.

To the rest of Hometown you weren't a human or a monster, but you were a monster. You were a perfect example of why they didn't let many humans live here. A psycho who brutalizes innocent monsters.

That's all you were to them.

You tried to get over it. Can't keep beating yourself up forever right? Time to move on to better things? Right? Your grades began to drop rapidly, bringing you from 3rd in the class to almost last place.

Despite everything, you kept going.

Kris did not understand you. They are one of the very few people who aren't scared of you. They feel for you, as a fellow outcast they get what it's like to just want to curl up in a ball and never leave your bed.

After everything that happened to them, all the yelling, being treated as an outcast, the weird looks, the loneliness, why wouldn't they want to just disappear?

You don't talk to anyone, sometimes you'll ask them for a pencil but other than that it's effectively radio silence between you and the rest of Hometown.

You rarely smiled, you were rarely seen outside of school or your house, and even seeing you at school became a more and more special encounter. You were almost like a secret boss in a video game or something.

You captured Kris' attention and never let go. Why couldn't they stop thinking about you?

"Well that's easy, you have a crush loser," Susie replied to them, throwing another rock into the lake.

Kris didn't believe a word of it.

A crush?

On you?

No way.

No wayyyyy.

Yes way?

I mean just because they thought your smile was so infectious that whenever you wave at them for a pencil they smile, or how even though they know what you did they can't get your face out of their head, or how no matter what you wear you look perfect doesn't mean they have a crush on you!

You probably wouldn't even like them back...

Only one way to find out right?

The sun was setting, signaling for all the other kids to leave the playground and start heading home. Except you. You decided to stay a little longer. Feet brushing through brown mulch below the swing you gently rocked yourself on, hands wrapped around your journal, you heard the sound of footsteps on grass. You glanced up, focusing on the approaching figure which had sat on the swing next to you.

Kris Dreemurr.

After several minutes of uncomfortable silence, Kris broke it.

"I don't think you're a bad person," Kris stated quietly looking to you for your reaction.

"Gee thanks." You said, a little confused with the whole interaction.

"Why don't you come to school anymore?" Kris asked you.

"Why do you care all of a sudden?" You teased, stretching your arms and yawning.

For you, this was just some chance interaction, but for Kris, this was now or never.

"Because I miss you," Kris explained quietly.

You froze for a second. Did Kris miss you? Town crazy person? Wow.

You grinned that crooked grin that Kris couldn't get enough of, before replying.

"Well if you care so much I guess I can show up some more." You proclaimed through your smile.

"I'd like that," Kris said, so quietly you barely heard them.

You stood up from your swing and yawned again. "It's getting late, let me walk you home." You offered.

Kris only nodded before standing up and dusting their pants off. Before they could react you had grabbed their hand and were pulling them along.

Oh.

Oh.

So you did like them back. Would have been nice to know that earlier.

-----

I wrote this March 12, 2023. I wrote it all in one day and I'm not super proud of it but you know how it is. Hope you enjoy it. I'm going to try and be more active again.

[loycos]

Lol can i plz have your Caitvi fic list?

haha, i wrote the tag asking people to ask for this list over a month ago and got that ask shortly after, only to go into my bookmark list and see that i have WAYYY too many saved in there. sorry it took a while.

There are a lot (A LOT) of piltover's finest fics, and a lot of them are good. this last year i've been FED like ive probably never been fed before in my life. that means i have a lot of bookmarks that i honestly don't remember much of other than "it good", but i wanted this rec list to include the fics that really left a (positive) mark on me. they aren't ordered in any specific way, and all are sfw. if you guys want my nsfw list, hit me up (i swear it wont take a month again)

Shadows at sea won't keep you from me - this is rated M but the sex is extremely vague. this one is very dialog heavy and is filled with inner vi monologue, however, it feels like a fresh take. I love the home-y vibes they give off here.

i won't let go (i left my baby teeth in your drawer) - caitlyn experiences a crisis in the shower. sounds like every caitvi fic you've ever read but i swear this one has something special to it. it feels really intimate in a way not many fics managed to capture imo, and caitlyn is written very in character.

High Tide Came and Brought You In - caitlyn's a mermaid, vi's a sailor. i'm usually not a person who actively seeks aus, especially not as extreme as this one, but this way such a sweet little thing, even i couldn't help but get swiped by the simple story.

Don't break the rules (maybe just for you) - "i hate aus! especially high school aus!" i scream again and again in every convo about fanfics i've ever had. so why is battle academia like my favorite caitvi au??? i don't know. makes no sense to me. i actively sought out this specific au tag, so i guess it makes me a liar too. what's so special about this one? idk, it has caitlyn and vi in it, it's well written and adorable, its a goddamn high school au, you know exactly what you're getting yourselves into. do be aware that BA!caitlyn is a different beast entirely than arcane!caitlyn, and so is BA!vi to an extent. (EDIT: i made it sound like im mad at this very cute fic, not my intention at all. this one is on here for a reason)

We Have Never Been Fairweather Friends- in the aftermath of the council's attack, caitlyn comes down with a mysterious disease, and vi is there to make sure she's ok. i, *cough*, might have talked about this one before. this might be my favorite fic, or top 2 at least. really good and in character writing, trippy and surprisingly authentic dream sequences, and a mystery that builds at a perfect rate.

Soaked with Sadness - caitlyn attempts catching jinx by herself, vi isn't too pleased. this is the other top 2 fic. the usual well-written-in-character compliment goes here, but also it's got that special brand of intimacy that i like, plus drunk caitlyn, and you kind of find out things in a non-linear way that make the story feel really... well crafted. i had to read it twice in a row cause i felt like i was missing things on the first go (might just be my dumb ESL brain tho).

the negative space and the pausing of time - aftermath fic. like author said, there are tons of those in the tag, and i have read probably all of them, but this one is really really good. the dialog feels especially flowy and snappy. kinda what i wouldve want to see in season 2, if arcane was just about angsty lesbians, which it sadly isn't. fics like this fill the void of the hiatus in my heart.

[gaz-light]

CW: Me but ugly

Ya know what fuck it. I don't intend to this mid week. I wanna do it now while I've got the time and honestly I'm a bit excited.

This is John. He's the guy I used to be. I don't have many other pictures of him but I saved these ones for this purpose. They're some of the few I could stand for some reason.

It's hard to think I ever used to look like that. Think or act the way I did. You could go back right now and tell him the events of the past like year or so and honestly he'd probably understand it. Would be too scared as shit nervous and doubtful to ever believe it. Hated himself too much to imagine it being this way.

This is how I started off on Hormones 1 year ago. 5/31/22. Somewhere between 11/7/21 and 4/9/22 everything went to shit. I crashed my motorcycle and broke my arm, ended up broke, didnt get into grad school, the girl I was madly in love with just let me know I was being replaced by someone with a pussy. It took about everything happy in my life turning to shit over night to finally crack the egg that I had been growing in for so long.

There were signs before. Things I always knew. Always hung out with girls. Liked sapphic content. Felt detachment from peers of my agab, enjoyed pretending at being an internet femboy. Horribly autistic. Fucking hated my body. Hated hated hated hated hated. I had a closeted sissy kink and dressed up FOR YEARS. So much more. Eventually I started hooking up with trannies the same way I hooked up with lesbians and things began to click. Something in me thought ya know what, I don't have to just admire and adore and yearn for them. Then a good friend of mine consoling me one April night more or less extended an invitation and I didn't look back.

And then she was born. I think these photos are from maybe a month post starting HRT. Would you believe I hadn't seen myself without facial hair in like 10 years before this point. I hadn't shaved it all off since I was 13. I'm hispanic. Greek and Cuban so I've had this accursed facial and body hair for fucking ever. I was so afraid the first time I picked up that razor. I didnt know if I'd like what was on the other side. I felt safe and secure in the validation I got from other people that I thought it'd be ok if I was just unhappy with myself forever. I hated whatever I was so much that I didnt have the energy to care for her.

Then I shaved.

I looked in the mirror and I thought that girl looked kinda cute. For the first time I really didnt think I looked so bad. My friends were very supportive thankfully. Not everyone was. Certainly not dear old dad who still wont call me by my name or gender me properly. The man who told me god had cursed him with 2 faggots. My little trans brother and I. The man who let me know I was a disappointment and that neither I or anyone of us were real women. I still havent forgiven him for so much. But I am trying to let it go. Even the cis people were kinda nice. I lost some who were kinda edgy friends from highschool. Nothing of value was lost.

Since then I've worked to navigate the professional world as a woman. My first boss at my first real post college job was this British woman from England who made my life kinda hell. Preyed upon and picked on me and embarrassed me professionally. One of the 2 other women at the office. She never would admit to it but I think she resented me for it. I was also the only tranny there. Well sorta. There was 1 other who worked down in facilities doing the trash and dishes for the labs. But not up there. Not on the 8th floor with us in the "war room".

And this is where and who we are now 1 year later. Same eyes. Same 5'0 looking ass. But happier. Smiles when she looks in the mirror. Can actually do things for herself. Set boundaries. Care. Maybe she can even love too. I've placed myself into countless lesbian romance fantasies and I feel like I have a shot at living them. I used to be like 200 pounds. I'm down to 128 and also built like a brick house full of muscle. I was horrified of being trapped in that body of mine forever and the fear and doubt that I'd never make it even this far scared me into doing nothing until i had little else to lose.

Let me leave you with some wise advice that friend who cracked my egg once gave to me: The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is right now.

Transitioning was the best decision I ever made for myself. Happy birthday Morrigan. I love you.

[sluttyminghao]

halaaa i wanted to ask you why you've become more inactive? like i remember spamming you with knock knock jokes and you replying to them (knock knock) but lately I've noticed a drift so like, are you okay pookie? :(

hello friend!

honestly ive not been well recently, physically or mentally. my chronic illnesses have been flaring up like never before and I've been so focused on my job as well (and additionally picking up hours while people are away etc) that I haven't really had time to write :( and when I see how many asks are sitting in my inbox it gets kind of daunting? like there's so many and I know people get impatient waiting for their asks to be done and just thinking about that gets me overwhelmed and I don't end up answering anything :")

im trying my best to be a little more active nowadays but it probably wont be much better until after the new year! sorry for the disappointment :(