#may never connected the dots she was that mad

[i-wakeupstrange]

This is one of my favorite Spider-Kids moments ever. Why? Because:

May is (rightfully) So Done with Reilly's nonsense

That she doesn't even question why he can recognize her out of costume and starts using her real name.

[mrsshabana]

Hey Mrs.Shabana I just wanna say I really love your work and it’s always been a delight to read. What I would like to request a part two of NTR because not only was it hot but the possible drama afterwards makes me excited and I wish to know what happens next! You don’t have to do it though take your time with everything

𝐍𝐓𝐑 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐓𝐰𝐨

꒦꒷‧₊ Summary After cheating on your boyfriend, Tengen, it's not long before you face the consequences of your actions. But things take an unexpected turn, and Gyutaro couldn't be happier with the results. ꒦꒷‧₊ Content Gyutaro x female!reader, college au, 18+ MDNI, vaginal sex, netorare, cheating. ꒦꒷‧₊ Note 1.4k words

✧:･ﾟ→ Part one

"Aw man, do you have to wipe it off? You look so pretty covered in my cum..." Gyutaro pouts as he hands you a paper towel.

"Yes!" You say, trying to avoid letting it drip into your mouth, "Tengen will be here any minute to pick me up."

Gyutaro rolls his eyes and crosses his arms as he watches you clean up the beautiful mess he made of you.

"Heh yeah, I'm lookin' forward to that," he smirks, imagining the look on Tengen's face when he received the photo he sent of you just moments ago.

Begrudgingly, Gyutaro helps you clean up. Taking the soiled paper towels and throwing them in the garbage bin.

"How do I look?" you smooth out your hair and try to look presentable.

Gyutaro narrows his eyes and looks you up and down, "Looks fine to me," he says as he can obviously see a bit of dried cum leftover in your hair - but purposefully decides not to say anything.

"Ok, thanks," you reapply your lipgloss and straighten out your clothes, "Hopefully he won't notice..."

Just as you begin to feel the guilt seep in, the doorknob jiggles, and Tengen barges into the room.

"YOU FUCKING WHORE!" He shouts and comes barreling towards you.

Never have you seen your boyfriend so angry, especially targeted towards you. You instinctually go to Gyutaro's side, grabbing his arm and staying close to him.

"What the hell has gotten into you?!" you wail, genuinely afraid and confused. Though Gyutaro is shockingly calm and collected, an arrogant aura emanates from him as he grabs his vape out of his pocket.

"Are you fucking serious? You slept with my roommate!!" Your boyfriend clenches his fists in anger.

"Technically she didn't sleep with me, she just sucked me off," Gyutaro says nonchalantly.

Tengen narrows his eyes at his roommate, filled with fury. But honestly, he's not even mad at Gyutaro, he already knows he's a scumbag. So he isn't surprised he'd do something like this, he's more upset with you.

"Shut up incel, adults are talking," Tengen snaps back, "How could you do this, Y/N? I should've known you were a good-for-nothing whore."

"But I-I..." you whimper as your eyes begin to water, shame taking over you. Maybe you really are just a whore. Tengen may stand you up a lot, but that doesn't mean he deserved to be cheated on.

"Tsk," Gyutaro scoffs and takes a drag of his vape, "You're one to talk."

"Shut it! You're just a pathetic virgin, you don't know shit."

"Oh really? Then maybe I should tell Y/N about Hinatsuru. Or maybe Makio or Suma?" Gyutaro smirks as he watches Tengen go pale, "But what do I know? I'm just a pathetic incel, right?"

"You fucking prick..." Tengen curses under his breath.

Your eyes widen as you connect the dots. Those were the girls that Tengen told you not to worry about, claiming that they were just childhood friends. You gave him the benefit of the doubt because you didn't have a reason not to. But now you feel like a complete and utter fool.

A part of you is fuming with anger but the other part feels relieved that now you're off the hook.

"Whatever," Tengen puts his hands up defensively, "You can have my sloppy seconds."

His words hurt, but honestly, you can't even bring yourself to care. As you watch Tengen leave and slam the door behind him, it's safe to say that your relationship is over.

But why is it that you don't even feel that sad about it? Maybe because a part of you figured he was already cheating. He was never around anyway so the fact that you're officially broken up doesn't change much. If anything you're just really happy that you don't have to feel bad about giving Gyutaro a blowjob anymore.

"We should fuck on his bed." Gyutaro breaks the silence with the most out-of-pocket, unhinged sentence. Though you can't say you're surprised he'd say such a thing in a moment like this.

"A-Are you serious?"

"Hell yeah," he takes another drag of his vape, "He said I could have you now so why hold back?"

You can't help but blush at his bluntness - this was one of the reasons why you crushed on Gyutaro in the first place. He's never afraid to say what's on his mind despite how strange or inappropriate it is.

"Haha, sure Gyutaro," you chuckle, "Let's do that."

With a big mischievous grin, Gyutaro takes your hand and leads you to his roommate's bedroom. Promtly pushing you onto the bed and hurriedly taking off his shirt.

"You're still wet from earlier, right?" he says as he slides off his pants, all too eager for round two.

"Y-yeah," you say shyly. He's right, you did get really wet when you gave him a blowjob - your panties are already soaked.

"Well hurry up, take that shit off," he gets impatient, his cock twitching as he glares down at you.

"He's one demanding virgin..." you think to yourself as you hurriedly take off your clothes. Honestly, you're surprised Gyutaro is already hard again after he just came. But he is a virgin after all so it makes sense.

Once your clothes have been fully removed, Gyutaro spreads your legs and crawls on top of you. "About fucking time, you know how many times I've jerked off while thinking about this?"

Your entire face goes red in embarrassment. His words aren't romantic in the slightest but his honesty is sexier than dirty talk could ever be.

You watch in horror as he's about to slide into you, "Wait!! Put a condom on first!"

Gyutaro rolls his eyes and shoves himself into you anyway, "Hell no, I wanna claim you in ways Tengen never could." He groans as he pushes his hips flush against you.

Your eyes roll back in ecstasy as you feel him fill you completely. After being wet for so long without any stimulation, it feels heavenly to finally have him inside of you.

"Ah f-fine," you moan, "But you have to pull out! I-I'm not on birth control."

"Fuck I'd love to get you pregnant so then you'd really be stuck with me," he murmurs, "But fine, I'll pull out if that's what you want."

You hope he'll keep his word, but honestly right now it feels too good to care. Gyutaro begins bucking his hips wildly, thrusting in and out of you with sloppy thrusts.

"You're my girl now, got it?" he says between gasps.

"Uh huh," you moan, "M'your girl now, Gyu."

"Fuck... good girl, Y/N" he picks up the pace - the sound of skin slapping fills the room. And your combined fluids splash where the two of you are connected, creating a nice messy pool on your ex-boyfriend's bed sheets.

Gyutaro doesn't quite know enough about sex yet to make you orgasm, but he's doing a decent enough job at fucking you that you already feel close. So you use your right hand to rub tight circles into your clit, while your other hand holds onto his shoulder for support.

"I fuck you better than he did, don't I?" Gyutaro growls, getting closer to his peak.

"Y-yeah, so much better," you moan, "B-Bigger too."

His lips curl into an arrogant smirk, he grabs your hips tightly and shakily pounds into you as hard as he can. So pussy drunk that he barely pulls out in time.

His cock twitching in the air as his nails dig into your hips, "Th-this'll show him! You're my girl now!" he whimpers as his semen splatters all over your abdomen and all over Tengen's sheets.

Watching the white sticky fluid stain the cloth does something to you and you feel your legs tremble as you reach orgasm. Moaning and arching your back, wishing that he was still inside of you.

"Fuck... he's an idiot for ever cheating on you. You're the perfect girl," Gyutaro rasps, leaning forward and catching your lips in a kiss.

As you lay there, a panting and sweaty mess, Gyutaro grabs some tissues and cleans you up. Then he haphazardly smears his semen on the bed sheets. Watching as it soaks into the fabric. Knowing that when Tengen gets into bed tonight he'll have a little surprise waiting for him.

[were-wolverine]

the eldritch Guardians of gotham notice batman when he first emerges- they see how he protects their city, so they gift him the abilities of a bat: wings, night vision, enhanced senses, fangs

bruce wayne becomes a shut-in after his parents die. then he travels the world only to come back the same old shut-in. he works from home, and doesn’t leave the manor. every window is covered. only lucius fox and alfred pennyworth ever enter or leave the house

one night the bat follows sirens to a circus tent, and he watches as a young boy is escorted out, crying for his parents. the next day alfred pennyworth shows up at gotham’s social services and requests to become a foster parent. a month later (money might speed the process along) dick grayson is out of juvie and the orphanage and into the safety of wayne manor

bruce tries to hide his wings when the boy arrives, but dick is fascinated by them and thinks they’re “awesome”. bruce explains how he got them, and that he is batman.

later, when batman gains a partner- robin- the Guardians of gotham bless the boy with gifts similar to his mentor: robin wings, enhanced senses, and nails that sharpen into talons

dick grayson becomes a shut-in like bruce, and is home-schooled by alfred. he doesn’t mind, he didn’t have friends his age in the circus either, and alfred and bruce are good company. bruce does let him get pets, though, a three-legged puppy he names Haley and a bloodhound named Ace

when he grows out of robin and away from gotham, the Guardians give him different wings (steller’s jay) to show they support his independence. he lives at titans tower for a while before moving to blüdhaven with his best friend donna troy. dick remains a shut-in, but takes online college courses and goes out often as a new hero- nightwing. he goes out in the mask during the day, something he never did in gotham, and spends most of his time as nightwing- not that he minds. (troia is only his nighttime vigilante partner since donna has an actual day job)

the cycle repeats with jason. however, when jason claws his way out of his grave, the Guardians guide him back to the manor where bruce finds him. when it seems like jason may never recover from his comatose state, the Guardians show bruce a lazarus pit beneath gotham, and despite his hesitation they assure him no harm will come to jason if they have a say in it

jason is revived without the nasty side effects (thanks, eldritch beings) and dick moves back to gotham. jason also leaves robin behind for a different name- red hood- and is gifted new wings (cardinal). in this au the bats & birds are more morally grey and will kill people, but only the worst of the worst/repeat offenders. jason still becomes a crime lord but he only kills when necessary and has no pit madness.

dick and jason notice their young neighbor tim drake is often home alone/without his parents and convince bruce to let him in on their secret and have him stay over at the manor. bruce eventually agrees and they later adopt tim. tim never becomes robin but he does know about their vigilante identities (og way- recognized dick as robin and connected the dots).

tim will help out on comms and basically this au’s Oracle. babs does not become a vigilante in this, instead she becomes a lawyer, but she is still paralyzed by the joker as a civilian (pre-jason’s death, bc bruce kills the joker after that)

steph works with the bats as Spoiler, and is eventually let it on their identities. she and tim bond over being the only ‘normal’ ones

when cass comes along, she is gifted the same powers as bruce, including bat wings. she goes by Black Bat and mostly communicates using sign language

bruce is never lost in time and damian eventually arrives in gotham. damian is given robin and the gifts that accompany it

since duke already has powers, the Guardians don’t give him any, but they protect him as their own

JUST. CRYPTID BATFAMILY <3

[fl3shm4id3n]

𝓗𝓾𝓶𝓪𝓷 𝓑𝓲𝓸𝓵𝓸𝓰𝔂

𝐑𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭: 𝐈 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢 𝐱 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧? 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐠𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐩𝐮𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 𝐮𝐩 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐝. 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐬𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐝𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐑𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐚 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐥𝐥𝐲𝐬. 𝐉𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬

𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐍𝐚𝐯𝐢

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ɴᴇᴛᴇʏᴀᴍ x ʜᴜᴍᴀɴ! ꜰᴇᴍ! ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ, ʀᴏɴᴀʟ x ᴅᴀᴜɢʜᴛᴇʀ! ʜᴜᴍᴀɴ! ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ (ᴘʟᴀᴛᴏɴɪᴄ)

Tw: period talks, pregnancy mentioned, blood, cramps, mentions of death, cuddling. 

Author’s note: This is after the war, Neteyam is alive and Ronal already had her baby. Also I may have the ages of the teen characters kind of mixed up, idk what Tsireya’s age is, so I assumed she is 16, but the reader would be between the ages of 15 or 16, I'm sorry if that’s confusing.

P.s.  Remember to stay hydrated, get enough sleep and eat a snack, treat yourselves :)

Masterlist

That morning you had woken up with terrible pain in your lower belly, you weren’t sure why it hurt so bad. Maybe was because you were feeling tired yestday and you had over slept. This kind of pain has never happened to you before. When you sat up, you looked down and you froze. Their was blood coming from between your legs. You reached out and touched the blood that was down your thigh now, you brought your hand up, seeing to much blood, you began to freak out. “Mother!” you yelled, now in the verge of tears.

“Mother!!” now you were crying, scared. “What is it y/n-” then she saw the blood on your hand, looking down at your thigh seeing blood between your thighs. “Oh my” she said coming closer and got on her knees next to you. “Are you hurt!?” she asked now freaking out like you were. “I don’t know, but my lower stomach really hurts” you wined, feeling the pain again.

“Tsireya!” Ronal yelled for her daughter who came in fast “what’s wrong?” she asked worried, she had your baby brother on her back wrapped around with a big cloth, keeping him close to her back. “Bring supplies and after go get Jakesully, hurry!” she said making Tsireya run to get the supplies, after she got them and gave them to Ronal, she left to go find the Jake.

Ronal was cleaning you up first, it horrified her seeing so much blood, she had seeing blood before but not this much in a while. She wanted to know what was happening, this has never happened to you. Then she thought about it, then she remembered, it was probably a curse done by Jake Sully for bringing his war to them. Was this some kind of punishment? Why did it have to happen to you.

You were already cleaned along with wearing a new loincloth and bottoms. You were still in pain, you were still in tears though. While you held your mother’s hand shaking, Sully and Neteyam came into the marui. “You called?” the oldest sully asked Ronal, when she turn to look at him, she was enraged. “Yes, I have” softly letting go of your hand and faced him. “What did you do to my daughter?” She asked. Jake looked confused “what do you mean?” he asked.

“She’s bleeding, she bleeding from her private area! What did you do?! Have you cursed my child!? Tell me!!” your mother was mad, you had never seen and heard her be that mad. Neteyam had walked over to you were you were laying and sat next to you. “How are you feeling?” he asked taking your hand and kissing your palm. “In pain” you said, relived seeing him, if you were about to die, then at least you got to see your Neteyam one final time.

Jake then connected  the dots, you were having your period, your first period at that. “Its alright Ronal, she not cursed” he said calmly towards the distressed mother “what do you mean, she’s bleeding out! She could die of blood loss” she shouted. “She won’t die, its normal for that to happen at her age” he said towards Ronal. “Normal? What do you mean normal?” she asked still furious but calm. “When it comes to human females, due to the lack of fertilizations in her eggs, her lining breaks down which causes bleeding” he explained. “Eggs? What eggs?” Ronal asked a bit confused, then Jake answered her question. “The eggs is what makes a baby, due to y/n not being pregnant its what causes the bleeding.”

Ronal now understood “those this only happen once in a life time?” she asked him, now calmer. “No, her moon cycle will happen every month for 2 or 5 days a week. To relief some pain from her lower stomach, normally pain medicine is used, but hot leaf tea can also help, along with something hot on her lower stomach” he explained. Ronal nodded “Is there any kind of symptoms?” She asked Jake. “Well, she will have moodswings, sleepiness and food cravings” Ronal turned back to look at you, who was holding Neteyam’s hand while he sat next to you. “I’ll be back, I’ll bring her something to drink” she said leaving the marui. Jake also left leaving the two teens.

“This sucks” you admitted as Neteyam smiled at you, stroking your hair away from your face. “It’s fine, its just human biology” he said leaning down to kiss your small forehead. “Neteyam?” you said catching his attention. “I’m cold” you said looking up at him, he smiled as he laid down next to you and pulled you close to him. You wrapped your small arms around his torso, feeling his warmth close to you made your cramps go away. “This is nice” you said closing your eyes feeling sleepy. “If only we could stay like this forever” he said kissing you head. Soon after you both fell asleep.

[cephalonserotonin]

do you think Solaris United know the tenno is a child?

do you think Ticker heard her Stardust stumble through a physics concept or mess up a word and thought, little one, you may be as displaced in that body as I am in mine.

Not necessarily understanding the mechanics of it and not especially caring. Just another luvvie who needs her help.

You're one of us now, and I take care of my own.

do you think Eudico put her faith in Sparky only for it to hit her, in the middle of her work in the back of her head, why the tenno don't quite behave like other soldiers? Did the guilt make her fall to her knees? Legs, the Ventkids, just more kids I am putting in danger.

When she realized that Little Duck knew all along, did she lift the spymaster up by her lapel and raise a fist, only for the Business to gently intervene?

do you think Roky put it together second, after Ticker, because obviously a grown-up wouldn't hang the k-drive like that! Confused at why the other Solaris are so upset, because why wouldn't childhood be anything but a mad dash for survival? That's all she's known.

do you think Zuud keeps the tenno at an emotional distance on purpose? So she doesn't build another family to lose? But the guns will still keep you safe. I know my guns.

I'll tell you what I think: Nef Anyo could encounter the tenno time and time again, and never connect the dots: he didn't get to where he is by now by putting his enemies at eye level.

[fog-and-the-frost]

Game theory time

The lives given to Fogscreech by the cats are all what the cat wanted/didn’t have and what caused their downfall.

After seeing more of Dahliaclaw’s story and seeing his sister. I started connecting dots in the story

Dahliaclaw was never allowed mercy on his sister or for her to give mercy to anyone and his downfall was the madness caused by the abuse and loss

Streamkit is interesting because it unknown why she went to the dark forest and all she gave was Love. Perhaps she both wanted and had in her short life the love of Dahliaclaw but love is what caused her to accept the dark forest to see Dahliaclaw. Or what left her damned in the first place..

Obviously with knowing so little the rest of these are theories

Fake!Slickstar- they looked like slickstar but are never stated as Slickstar perhaps they are a cat who tried to take on Slickstar’s identity and were never Honest. They likely did not have 9 lives even if they claimed to have them and they have been found as a fraud and killed for their deception

Now this cat is honestly the hardest with the details given because Rowantorch seems like not a great cat in any ways so this may be a stretch but perhaps the reason for Rowantorch first dissecting dead bodies to killing other cats to killing his son was due in part to what previously entertained him having become more and more boring so he had to go farther to keep life engaging. Eventually what Rowantorch considered ‘mischief’ would catch up to him and get him caught and likely killed.

Nikola as a kittypet had much to prove and likely had to compensate for low self-worth for a long time. Which is why he stayed allied with the clans for a while even during their cruelty to outsiders. When it became too much, Nikola was likely foolish in his attempts to betray the clans and was caught and killed or planned something big that ultimately failed

The freaky cat, obviously has no name and is another challenge but with the life they gave Prosperity and Greed it is likely they had a clan or even a rogue group that wanted a clan that would not suffer or starve with expansive territory yet the freaky cat’s greed grew and grew taking so much that war would continually start and be unable to be sustained or even just that too much was taken and they were retaliated against

Stormwhistle wanted a balance of good and evil. And would do anything to keep it so. However they were afriad their clan was too good and even if being good was ‘good’ it was not balanced between the forces. Maybe they feared the great good being weighted by a great bad so they tried to push cats to be worse so the balancing force would be weaker

Marshbriar is one where her reason for being in the dark forest is unknown but she gave a life for Ascenstion and Death. Ascension can refer to a wish for her to get to starclan due to her cruel mate or can refer to her wish to climb a higher rank. I believe Starclan is more likely due to her committing suicide. Yet her sin was death. She killed herself at a gathering a highly sacred place and many of these other cats do have quite high body counts so it’d be odd if her giving a life for Death unless it was referring to her own death commited by her own paws

Rosestar we also know nothing about but giving a life of righteousness and regrets suggesting he tried to be righteous but went too far or did something terrible that led to many regrets including the near destruction of fallenclan.

But that’s just a theory aaa gayyyyyyyy theory!

ohhh you have many many thoughts. i will not confirm or deny anything but i do really like this...

[urf1lterr]

lovesick | pedro pascal [4]

"and on this night and in this light i think im falling, im falling for you."

previous chapter: [3] series masterlist

summary: in which a 1975-obsessed film student accidentally falls in love with an older man she can't have.

pairing: actor!pedro x intern!reader

genre: acting world!au, big age-gap!, strangers to friends- maybe lovers?? au | angst, mature, awkward, love- eventually

word count: 10.6k

status: in progress

author's note: so sorry for the long wait! but i tried making this chapter longggg. i typically have my days off altogether and the rest of the week booked with work/school. i try to post many chapters within my short timeframe (bc im booked af) so pls expect another update soon after this one! sadly, it takes me around 8-10 hours to write one bc its hard to think lol. also, i don't want this to be too long of a series and kinda wanna connect the dots- slowly but surely, ya know? not edited.

"So, he just came knocking on your door at 6am?" Joon questioned, taking a sip of his smoothie soon afterwards. "I can't even wake up that early."

"We had to do that everyday for our last job."

"I woke up ten minutes before I had to be out the door," he shrugged. "Men get ready fast."

"Anyway," you eyed him as he cluelessly did the same, confused as to why you wouldn't look away. "I don't remember him coming."

"Yeah, because you fucking freaked out and hallucinated over Lady Gaga," Jules exclaimed, you automatically cringing just at the horrible memories you've recently faced with that damn cat.

Once she explained what had happened hours after you had woken up, you were disturbingly shocked.

And the fact that your sleepiness was to blame had you going insane- imagine all the other odd things you may had committed while under the covers.

But you will admit you did remember some of that night's events clearly, again like you practically making out with Lady Gaga- although she was the one who licked your face endlessly first.

Mortified just by the thoughts, you will never be able to face Pedro again sanely.

How could you when you recently dreamed about a man 25 years older being intimate with you- that's...confusing. And the worst part of it all was you couldn't say anything to anyone with the fear of being judged or laughed at- maybe both.

The thing was you couldn't quite understand why you had to dream about that. Maybe your time of the month was coming and your hormones targeted the first guy you had nonstop contact with?

No, that would've been Joon.

Attraction may had played a part but Joon definitely had that, Pedro as well but a little different...age-wise at least. There's no way you felt allured for men with bad jokes and rough skin- no offense. Right?

He did text you that same morning he dropped by and commented on how creepy you are half asleep and whether or not you agreed to his 'business' proposal. Not trying to start a conversation you knew you couldn't finish, out of second-hand shame, you just replied a simple:

LOL but busy with school atm to make a final decision- tell ya later

That later still hasn't arrived.

Unfortunately, you forgot to ask him why he made a random visit that morning- but you weren't going to ask him days later. In your mind, you need to avoid him. There's no way you'd be able to act normal after have unholy fascinations about him.

Not that it'll be a problem, you two hadn't seen each other for weeks before your cafe encounter, you're sure you can do it again without him noticing your distance.

It's been about two days since then which meant you didn't have to prioritize so much of your time on homework, you'll just save that for Sunday when it's all due.

"Did you bother to ask him why?" Jules added, turning to you. "He obviously wasn't coming to see me- I barely know the guy."

"You do know him!" you argue as she rolls her eyes. "You literally got mad at me for not recognizing him the first time we met."

"He's a celebrity- everybody knows him," she defends before tilting her head in curiosity. "But you two are oddly close, it's kind of weird."

"No," you shake your head, trying to laugh off her suspicions. "We are casual friends who fan girl over the same things."

People did take notice how close Pedro and you were but it wasn't anybody's fault you two had so much in common. Both of you loved Starbucks, going on hikes- when you weren't lazy, and believe Matt Healy is extremely attractive.

If they have a problem with that they can sue you.

"I see it," Joon adds, jumping up a bit. "Him and I barely talk and we're men- we should be bonding easily!"

"You're...you," Jules cringes, making Joon glare in return. "I can understand why he chooses not to be close to you."

Laughing, you watch as Joon quickly flips her the finger before he continues on with the conversation. "I just feel like he always comes around only to see you, it was pretty obvious since the first time he took us home."

Furrowing your eyebrows, you didn't understand what he meant by that. Pedro offered all three of you a ride home, not just you.

Already feeling done with this topic, you wanted to switch it before things started escalating and freaky theories started unfolding. They had every right to question your friendship, but you were starting to think they might be leading down a road where they may soon develop other impressions as to what your friendship might have been.

Why are you even thinking that? That's so inappropriate to imagine.

"You two are silly, he probably needed my advice on something or wanted to workout," you suggest, their faces showing they weren't fully convinced. "But anywho, did you call Yoongi yet?"

"I don't think that's a great idea," Joon declared, adjusting in your warm sofa. "He's not really a skating kind of guy."

Since it was Friday and you had no plans, you thought it would be a fun idea to be adventurous for once and do something you would never do on a regular basis.

Ice Skate.

Your friends were extremely down with the idea, but you needed a fourth person to make the group complete. Why not a skinny, impatient blonde man who would probably spend the whole night complaining about why this plan was awful?

Right now you could use some other grumpiness in your life.

"Just tell him to go," you beam back, clapping your hands in excitement as you'll soon be able to fall countless of times on the ice. "I'll buy him hot cocoa."

"You better do it or he'll never let that go," Joon states.

After hours of sitting around and blasting random music through your speakers, the three of you were ready to set off on your journey of locating the ice rink.

If it wasn't for Joon's constant whining to stop walking to take pictures of the scenery you probably would've arrived 15 minutes sooner than your actual arrival, but too bad your friend is a nature freak.

"You taking pictures of the pigeons better not be the reason why you're late," you heard Yoongi grumble as the three of you finally found him sitting on a bench near the entrance of the rink, staring directly at Joon who just scoffed.

"I'm sorry if my happiness bothers you," Joon snapped back as Yoongi just stood up from his seat and made his way to your trio.

Grabbing your ice skates wasn't too difficult as the long line seemed to flow by smoothly, but standing on them was a different story.

"I can't do this," you squeal as your hurriedly motion your arms around to find some balance. "I'm falling!"

Yoongi sent you a questionable look as he watched your poor attempts to stay still embarrassing. "We're not even on the ice yet."

Feeling a hand grab a hold on your shoulders and practically drag your feet towards the ice, you glance up to see Jules steadily directing you to face your fears.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

"Are you going to push her in?!" you hear Joon gasp a few feet behind you but you couldn't turn your head as you rather focused your attention on yanking yourself off of Jules.

"It was her idea so she'll be the one going in first."

"Ahh!" you screech, putting all your pressure on your feet to stop her hard pull. Spiraling your ankles in the most crucial ways, you start to lightly slap her arms off you as she continues to fight them off.

One thing about her was she's going to make sure to remind you that this was your idea.

Feeling an arm gently tug you off her grip, you landed on Yoongi's side as Jules whined in return, offended that he ruined her vicious plan. Respectfully, he kept you stable with an arm wrapped behind your middle back as you gripped his other one, fearful she might snatch you away again.

"Why would you do that?!"

"I don't think watching her fall face first on the hard ice would be a fun sight to see," he bluntly returned as Jules huffed. "The sight of blood gives me the ick."

"I was waiting for that moment all afternoon," Jules sighed, disappointed that she wouldn't be seeing you fall- yet.

Waiting for her to walk away to go on the ice, you see Joon follow her before you released your friend, relieved that she wouldn't be partaking in her scandalous scheme just yet.

"You do know how to skate, right?" Yoongi asked, his uncertain eyes on yours as you crazily wave your arms in front of him to rub off his questionable thoughts.

"Do I? Of course I do!" you argue, making your way towards the ice until you were two feet away from it. Putting your feet on the edge, you hesitate as you could feel the cold breeze wrap around you legs. "I'm gonna go now."

"Yippy," he states, waiting at your poor attempts to convince him.

Giving him a thumbs up, you clap your hands together to try to reassure yourself that you could do this, forgetting that he was right behind you secretly laughing.

Taking one final breath, you placed your right foot on top of the ice steadily, trying your best not to make any harsh movements, until you felt a hard jerk on your upper body, making you lose yourself in an instant.

"God, if you don't know how to skate why would you suggest it?" Yoongi grumbled, gliding both your bodies along the ice as he held tightly onto your arms. You were practically skating like a wet dog in front of him, begging with your eyes for him not to abandon you.

"I always wanted to try."

Sending you an annoyed look, you zipped your mouth as his arms were now securing you, closing any gaps there may have been and giving you the ride of your life.

Shutting your eyes harshly, you didn't dare to witness the environment around as you felt the icy wind slap your face the faster you two- or at least by Yoongi's swaying, got.

There were times where he did pretend to lose his balance, causing you to cry in horror and him immediately placing his hand over your mouth by how loud you weaped.

But other than that, you came to enjoy his help as your two other friends rudely abandoned you guys in order to practice their poor attempts of leaping across the rink.

"Okay," Yoongi started, releasing his left hand from your side and keeping you close with only his other. "Now you try on your own."

Fear creeping up in your face, you rapidly shake your head in disagreement and try catching his recent abandoned arm, which he denied. "I can't."

"Can't or won't?" he countered back making you silent.

He did have a point.

"C'mon, it's not that hard. If Joon could do it, you can."

"He's literally on the ground right now," you whine as Yoongi quickly averts his eyes in search of your tall friend, soon finding Joon clutching his knee in pain as Jules records on her phone.

"No."

Sighing, he continues to look around, trying to plan out an idea that would at least convince you to slide a few feet alone without his help until he smirked and met your eyes.

"What would Matt Healy do?"

Widening your eyes, you were taken back by his question.

Only Pedro used that line on you.

And for some reason it felt odd when Yoongi did the same. You shouldn't be bothered by his choice of words...but you were a little.

He wasn't him to be saying it.

"He wouldn't force me to do something I didn't want to do," you reply back, causing him to groan.

"I feel like you just want to be in my arms," he retorted with a grin, immediately making you revolt and fly out of his arms, your bottom hitting the ice hard. "Well that's one way to make you skate."

Feeling immediate pain on the back of your thighs, you just knew you were going to be bruised and swollen the next day. But hey, this technically counts for your workout for the week.

Awkwardly swaying your body around, you couldn't get up off the damn ice. You were sure you looked like a fish out of water by how crazy you were moving.

"Get on your knees," Yoongi commented, causing you to send him a death glare as he lifted his hands up in defense. "It helps you stand."

Or he could just grab your arms and help you himself.

Cautiously following his suggestion, you slowly pull your right leg up and place it firmly on the ice before slowly trying to do so with your left one. As you began to feel satisfied with the weight being supported, you felt your body finally working and lifting up off the ground before he poked your shoulder- making you fall again.

"I'm going to murder you!" you threaten as you stare at him on your back, whole body restlessly laying on the ground in misery as he cackles loudly.

He may have advantage on the ice, but oh man- once you regain your balance off it you were going to end that slender man's life.

"Isn't this just a sight to see," you heard someone exclaim before hands grab your arms and soon lift you back on your feet.

Moving your eyes to the ones in front of you, you burst out in smiles. "Bella! Nico!"

"I take this as my queue to leave,'" you hear Yoongi mumbles but you swiftly grab his arm from his close proximity and halt his plans.

He was not going to desert you now.

"What are you girls doing here?"

Not seeing them for a few weeks didn't make things awkward, but different. It was like catching up with old friends, even though you barely met them less than three months ago.

"Had nothing to do tonight so why not ice skate?" Nico giggled.

Bella examined you up and down before pointing at your head. "My god, your hair grew so long. Has it really been that long?"

Rolling your eyes, you were about to answer her before Yoongi cut in. "No, it's her fake extenstions."

Gasping, you turn your body to him and smack his shoulder as he smacks you back. One thing about him, he's all about equality. You touch him, he touches you- simple.

You don't see the way Nico and Bella exchange smirks to one another before Nico slides in front of you and pulls out her phone. "We should take a selfie! You know, for memories."

Laughing, you agree. You took some pictures with them but never really out of the work environment.

Uncomfortably standing still, Yoongi hastily moves to the side a bit, not wanting to intrude this moment you were having with your friends. He was a pretty sociable person, but only if they had things in common and he fairly knew them.

Yoongi didn't know these two young girls and he sure as hell didn't want to be the one being kicked out of this picture- so why not kick himself out first?

"Where are you going, we need your long arm to get us all in the frame!" Bella exclaimed, motioning Yoongi to move back as he sent her a flustered glance.

"I can just take it with the three of you."

"Nonsense!" Nico argued back, shaking her head as you giggled. "We don't leave people out."

Biting his bottom lip a bit, he scratches the back of his neck swiftly before increasing the speed of his skates to the girl, accepting her phone. "I suppose."

Fixing your posture, you stand behind your friend as he carefully raises his right arm up in the air, positioning the phone that was able to capture all four of you in the frame.

Pulling out the gummiest smile, you bursted out a gigantic grin after seeing the rare radiant expression Yoongi was giving. He was never one to show much emotion so finding him giving in for a picture amused you.

Taking the phone out of his hands, Bella examined the screen before chuckling. "Wow, you've got one adorable smile."

You could've sworn you saw Yoongi blush as he lowered his head while shaking off her compliment, trying to act natural but he wasn't fooling anyone.

He was shy.

Gasping at the sight in front of her, Nico pointed at the concession cart near one of the exits of the ice. "They have hot cocoa! We must get some."

Faking a groan, Bella allowed her friend to drag her away but not before sending you a pout to follow, which you were happy to do. You were freezing to death without even realizing it until you stopped your attempts to skate for the picture.

"I was promised a free cup," Yoongi stated as he was gliding behind you, softly pushing your back as you proceeded to do nothing but allow him to direct you to where your desired hot cocoa was.

Scoffing a little, you shush him as you reached the exit ramp. Jumping off, the two of you slowly waddled to Bella and Nico who were next in line.

"Wait," you start, pausing your footsteps which resulted in him almost falling after slamming to your side. "Shouldn't we ask Joon and Jules if they want one?"

Peeking over your shoulder, Yoongi looks back down to you. "Nah, don't wanna ruin their fun."

Following his recent glance, you could see Joon and Jules in front of one another, both holding hands as they try to catch a faster pace while twirling in big circles.

You were sure they were eventually going to knock a small child over soon.

"Next," you hear the worker call out, sitting behind his register waiting for your arrival.

Quickly walking up, you place your order as nothing else but the hot drinks seemed to interest you. The total came out to be the cost as what four drinks at your local cafe would be, but you shouldn't be surprised since this place was pretty popular to the public.

Pulling out his wallet so fast, you didn't have to process what Yoongi was doing until you caught the view of his credit card as he handed it over to the man in front of you.

"No-" you try intercepting what had just happened by giving your card to the worker who just shrugged as he had already paid for the drinks on Yoongi's card. "Why would you do that?"

"You're too slow," Yoongi bluntly said as he grabbed the two drinks and moved to the side so the next person in line could place their order.

"But it hadn't even been three seconds since he said the total before you handed him the card," you protest.

He handed you your cup, hoping it'll shut you up as he took a small sip from his own. "And?"

Is he being serious? "'And,'" you question as he continued to be unaware as to what you were getting at. "Since the beginning I vowed to buy you hot cocoa."

Yoongi laughed at how stubborn you were becoming. "Vowed? What a great word choice for this scenario, fiance."

Rolling your eyes at his teasing, you hated the fact he was avoiding your question. You knew he did it because he wanted to be a gentleman, but the problem was he didn't want to admit he was one.

Again, he was being shy.

"I see you are kind," you smirk as he gave you a disgusted glance. "Don't worry, I won't tell people you have a heart."

Before he could leave a snarky comeback, Nico and Bella came back in giggles as Yoongi retreated back to his natural state of looking lifeless. "Oh my gosh- we went to get napkins and I kid you not I may have poured my drink on the back of this poor little girl."

Lightly gasping, you widen your eyes as Yoongi confusingly replies back. "May have? You don't know if you did or not?"

Bella makes an accountable face, scrunching her nose in the process. "Okay, I did. But she's the one who ran into me!"

"Well, she was really small and you kind of didn't search your surroundings before kneeing her," Nico exposed, causing Yoongi and you to give each other a concerned look.

"You kneed her?!"

"Only in her side," Bella excused herself, sending Nico a betrayed look. "It wasn't like it was her stomach."

"It practically was...," Nico mumbled but became silent when her co-star eyed her hard.

Coughing uncomfortably, Yoongi caught everyone's attention as he tried to avert the conversation into something that wasn't as horrific as striking a child with hot cocoa and a knee. "We should probably hit the ice again soon before Jules and Joon find out we got these drinks without them."

"Jules is here?!" Bella beamed, searching around for her through the large gatherings of people on the ice. "I missed that crazy lady, she was the only one who would get my coffee order right."

"She told me she would threaten to get the baristas fired if they kept getting it wrong," Nico recalled, chewing her mouth a little. "That's why I stopped letting her take my orders."

Sighing, you looked up in the ceiling in disapproval as you could feel Yoongi laughing his ass off beside you. That was very Jules of her to do.

After another two hours of trying to figure out how to skate, and basically latching onto Yoongi the whole time as Bella and Nico were doing laps around you guys, you finally made it home.

To say you were exhausted would be an understatement- you were drained.

No, seriously. You hadn't worked out this much since Jules and you almost missed the subway two months ago and had to run three blocks to catch it on time.

That day was dreadful, but you were sure if you went to bed you were going to wake up lifeless like a worm.

"I call the shower first!" you hear Jules scream, running to her room in order to grab her belongings but you were faster and instantly made your way to the bathroom, locking the door before she could break in. "You bitch! How dare you steal it with my back turned!"

Grinning evilly to yourself, you wanted to get your night routines over with so you could hit the pillows quickly. Even after taking off all your makeup, taking a very steamy shower, and doing your nightly skin care routine, you were sure you could easily knock out sitting on the toilet if you had the chance.

We all have done it once in our lives.

Opening the door, the steam flows out smoothly as you face your very displeased roommate on the other side, glaring at you. "All yours," you smile, stepping to the side but she roughly pushes you in response, causing you to yelp as you manage to catch your balance midway.

Mental note, burn her eggs next breakfast.

Stepping into your room, you change into an oversized hoodie and sweats before throwing yourself under your covers in excitement.

The moment you've been waiting for all day: sleep.

Closing your eyes, you feel all your senses slowly drifting away from your body as relaxation crept up from all around. It was truly intoxicating how in trance you were.

But of course with your luck, nothing goes as planned- ever.

Wildly jumping up from the loud blaring of your phone, you cover your face in agony as the vibrations and noise cause pain throughout your entire body.

Who the hell was calling you at 10 o'clock at night? This should be illegal.

After taking a minute to control yourself, the ringing stopped. Good, now you won't have to make time to engage in a conversation. Quickly falling back down onto your pillows, it wasn't even ten seconds later before you feel your phone going off like crazy again.

With you eyes shut, you move your hands around your bed until you feel the cool object underneath your pillow. Lazily pressing any button, without batting one eye open, you move the phone to your ear before releasing a groggy, "What?"

"What a lovely way to greet somebody, kiddo."

You instantly freeze, automatically thinking about the vivid dream you had about him, then Lady Gaga, and felt a blush creeping in.

Slowly pulling the phone away, you let out a loud but fast scream before moving it back. How the hell are you going to begin a conversation without thinking about his lips on yours. "What do you want?"

Pausing for a second, you can hear him move around through his end. "Did you just scream?"

It's not like you didn't just dream about him kissing all over your body two nights ago.

"Did you just wake me up to ask me the obvious answer?"

Act like you don't care. Like you are perfectly fine.

He chuckles lightly and you can tell by his tone he was close to passing out too. "Somebody's cranky, is it past your bedtime?" Pedro teased.

You were definitely not in the mood to handle his ridicules at this hour, especially by how nervous he was slowly making you. What did he want?

"Yes," you simply reply before hitting the red button, ending the call and laying your head back on your pillow. Good, just end it before you make a bigger fool out of yourself.

It hadn't even been another ten seconds before your phone was ringing once again. Pulling it up to your face, you let out a huff. What a shocker, it was him again.

"You better have an insanely good reason as to why you chose to wake me up in the middle of my dream," you immediately say as you press the 'accept' button.

Hearing him laugh, you just know he has a sarcastic comment coming any second. "Wake you up? Honey, you're still living your dream talking to me."

Honey.

No, not another nickname for him to call you in future dreams.

Shaking that thought away, you rejected the idea of him being in any more dreams- you forbid it.

Loss at words for a second, you almost let your next words trip over one another before calmly gaining your composure at the incidental choice of your pet name.

"So funny," you reply back, trying your best to sound sane. "Pretty sure I was dreaming of a very shirtless Matt Healy playing 'Please Be Naked' to me."

Why the fuck would you slip that out.

"Are you trying to hint at something?" he smirks, making you press mute and hold your hand over your mouth to hold back the screams you feared would release.

Feeling like your soul was about to leave your body, you couldn't believe he just said that.

Actually, you couldn't believe you would even recommend that song. God, your sleepiness was messing with your mind.

Finding your energy once again, you unmute the call and try to seem unfazed by his last comment. "Yes, that I want to sleep. Goodbye now."

Before you could hit the red button again, you could hear him chanting over the phone to do the exact opposite. "Don't!"

Groaning, you clutch the phone harder in despair. "I am so tired. Don't do this to me, please. I am a girl who values her sleep!" you whine as you hear him continue his light giggles in the background. "If I don't sleep I will die, is this what you want. Are you trying to kill me?"

"I can reassure you I don't plan on keeping you up long," he explains. "And I wouldn't dare wish for your death."

Your heart fluttering, you glare at your chest. "Then what do you want?"

Moving his phone from one ear to the other, he lays in his bed while smiling at his ceiling. "You," he declares, making you widen your eyes as he shuffles around in his blanket. "Tomorrow, let's hang out."

Sitting up against your bed frame, you furrow your brow. "Hang out? For what?" There's no way you will be able to act normal for a long period of time, your weak-self can't do it.

Placing a hand over his chest, he lets out a light hiss in fake hurt by your comeback before continuing. "Can't I hang out with you by choice and not by a work schedule? Unless you're so disgusted by me." That's when he started his fake cries. "I'm so sorry I am not Matt Healy and can't do a great British accent."

Shaking your head, you try to intervene as his ugly cries become louder through the line. "That's not what I meant, stop being dramatic," you complain as he instantly stops while smiling widely. "Is there a specific reason why you want to hang out?"

Taking a deep breath, he fiddles with the fingers on his non-occupied hand. "Does there need to be a reason?"

You pause for a second. He's acting too kind for your liking and it's making you question what his intentions are. In this point of time, you're sure he's going to take that moment to convince you to work with him in Canada.

"With you there's always a reason."

Scoffing lightly, he grumbles. "I just want to go on a hike and need a hiking partner."

Oh hell no, you already did enough working out this evening. You were not about to do that again, that's for sure.

"Yeah, nooo," you exhale lowly. "I already did too much working out with my body if you know what I mean and-"

"I don't know what that means," he cuts you off.

"It means I am going to be sore for days so my body has no strength to walk for more than five minutes," you declare as he falls silent.

After a few seconds that felt like forever, he replies. "Fine," he blankly states. "Have a goodnight, sweetheart."

The warmth as blood began drawing to your face became present as you quickly reply with a simple "night" before ending the call. And for some reason you felt as if you couldn't breathe normally by the pounding on your chest.

What the hell was happening to you. Looking up at the ceiling, you silently pray you don't have a Lady Gaga 2.0 fiasco.

As you were questioning why your heart made you feel as if you were going under cardiac arrest the night before, your body was currently making you feel if you really needed to make that trip to the ER by how tender you were.

It also didn't help that Jules was the one waking you up at the crack of dawn, half asleep with her eye mask clinging onto her forehead.

"W-why are you-" you grumble, rubbing your eyes as you look at the alarm clock near your bedside. "-waking me up at 6:18am? It's Saturday."

She sent you a death glare for assuming she randomly wanted to wake you up for the fun of it as she was the one who was woken up first. "Someone's here for you."

Positioning your body upwards, you squint your eyes up at her. "What are you talking about?"

"Why don't you take a look for yourself," she gritted her teeth, swaying her head towards your door.

Slowly standing up, you make your way to it before sneaking a peak of the view of your living room. That's when you see a very annoying man you were sure you both agreed on the phone last night to not go hiking.

Luckily, he didn't notice your wandering eyes as his were glued to his phone, scrolling through his social media.

What was he doing here? You can't face him without thinking about his body wrapped around yours and his lips doing dangerous things.

Oh no, you truly were screwed.

Lightly shutting your door, you nervously turn back to your roommate who looks displeased. "I told him no."

"No means yes, I guess," she replies, snaking her arms around her body for warmth. "I'm going back to bed."

You could hear her walk out of your room as you frantically begin searching for something warm yet comfortable clothes to wear on this undesired hike. You knew if you tried backing out he would stay until you caved, he was very persistent to get what he wanted.

And what he wanted was for you to get your ass up and exercise.

You were also certain you heard Jules let out a "thanks for the invite" to him before hearing her bedroom door shut.

Running out of your room, you made sure not to look in his direction so he wouldn't see your morning appearance clearly- well he already has but why reveal yourself in this state again?

Quickly brushing your hair, teeth, and washing your face, you change into a baggy green sweatshirt and some black workout leggings before slipping on suited running shoes.

Try to act natural. Give him little attention so he won't speculate anything. You aren't into old men and did not vision him smooching you on your sofa.

"You are so buying me breakfast," you deadpan as you walked straight out of your door, not even daring to wait for him to follow.

Good, be straightforward.

Laughing to himself, Pedro promptly jumped off the couch and jogged after you once you shut the door on him and continued down the halls to the elevators.

Finally catching up, he barely made it through the elevator doors as they were closing to find you leaning against the corner, mad and tired. "Good morning to you, too."

You let out a small cry as you lay your head against the wall in pain from how frustratingly exhausted you were. If one cold breeze hit you outside you were sure you were going to burst into tears.

"Oh, come one," he walks over to you and nudged your shoulder to wake up some more. If he unexpectedly touched you again you were sure you were going to rip his arm off. "In a few minutes you'll be wide awake and fine."

"How dare you assume I'm going to be fine!" you whine, trying to hit his side but he manages to capture your arm and that's when you give up and allow your worn out body to fall on him.

He instantly wraps his arms around you as your head falls just beneath his chin, your eyes slowly closing and your thoughts drifting away as his warmth was making you drowsy.

You tried to stay focus, but your poor state was taking over and you suddenly weren't as anxious as you once were. Being sleepy really made your mind roam.

"Hey, now," he whispers and looks down to see you snuggling up against him. "You can't fall asleep on me. I do not want your security guards thinking I drugged you."

Tightening your arms on how lower sides, you ignore him as you feel yourself easing closer to dozing off by the constant beating of his heart. "Stop," you mumble, clutching your ears softly before positioning your head on the other side of his chest.

"What?" he curiously glances down at you.

"You heartbeat's annoying me," you lightly whine. "It's pounding against my ears."

Pedro was extremely glad you were too tired to process his heartbeat and the bright red tint plastered across his face. Your drained-self definitely saved him from embarrassment.

Finally, the elevator doors opened and you still weren't moving. You were too comfortable to make any effort to walk on your own and if he really wanted you to hang out this morning then he was going to have to find a way to make you move.

And to him, dragging you was his best option yet. But with care.

Delicately keeping his arms secured around you, he gradually walked out with you still engulfed by him, eyes shut and only moving your feet with his pace.

Honestly, you were surprised how much rhythm you had.

Stopping to pull out his car keys, he unlocked his car and opened his passenger side door once you two reached the garage complex. Gently, laying you on the seat, you station you head against the headrest as he buckled you in. "God, I really hope security doesn't report me."

And once he made it to his side and hopped in, he laughed at the state you were in, head instantly bent to your side and legs tangled together in hope to create some kind of warmth. "Adorable."

But of course you were too dumb to not catch that.

You were awoken by a small speed bump and the instant hit of warmth through the heat vents, your eyes slowly glancing around your surroundings. Taking a quick peep at the screen indicating the time, you read that it was almost 7am.

Tilting your head and leaning against the headrest, you lazily stare at Pedro as he continues to drive to god knows where.

"Don't I look so handsome in the morning?" he jokes before meeting your eyes, sending you a warm grin.

And handsome on top of you.

Shutting your eyes tightly, you beg your imagination to please shut the fuck up.

"You mean drastic," you mutter, moving your head to the opposite side, against the window to force some sleep again.

Better to make time fly by faster knocking out where you were sure you wouldn't say anything stupid.

"Hey, no..." he whines, moving his right arm across to shake your chin softly to keep you conscious. "Don't pass out on me again, I'm lonely."

"And I'm tired, deal with it."

Shuffling in his seat, he looks over to see you curling yourself up in a ball with your legs to your knees and arms wrapped around. Not thinking things throughly, he hits the brakes hard for a split second and watches as your body jolts forward before swinging back against his seat.

"What the fuck!" you shriek, propping your body up and facing him in pure rage. "Are you trying to irritate me?!"

"I'm lonely and you're not helping," Pedro calmly states, shrugging as you continue your daggers his way.

You were beyond pissed. How could he think you would be energetic and talkative right now? How could he attempt to make you fly out the window? You could feel your nerves slowly fading away by the fury growing inside you.

If he wanted you awake then fine, you were going to be awake.

Doesn't mean you had to talk though.

Silently sitting up, you stare at the windshield in front of you and watch the cars drive as he continues to spare you a glance every once in a while.

Honestly, your silence was terrifying the fuck out of him. Normally, you would have some snarky comeback or violent punch to return to his evil tactics, but you were doing nothing.

Literally nothing.

And he knows damn well the sights of trees and cars did not interest you.

"Hey...," you feel Pedro lightly poke your side, pursing his lips once he saw your non-existent reaction. "You're not mad, right?"

Ignoring him, you continue your deep stare now onto more trees as you two were getting closer to nature than streets. You must've been out for some time as you barely noticed how far away from the city you really were.

Joon would really love this.

Gradually lifting his arm up, his places it on top of your own and gives it a small squeeze while laying it there. "C'mon, don't ignore me."

As if that would make you stop your scheme.

Blinking slowly, you acted like you paid no attention to his puppy dog pleads as the car was making its way towards an almost empty parking lot, all surrounded by a forest that only had one route starting within an old wooden bridge.

Pulling up to a nearby parking spot, Pedro parked the car before turning back to try and capture your attention but nothing was working.

You were so damn frustrating, it was infuriating. But he was still desperate to gain your attention.

"Are you just going to sit in here all day or what?" he questions as he waves a hand over your face to make you blink.

You didn't and that kind of frightened him. Work of the devil.

"I am going to cry," he warned, swatting his hand over his face to prepare for his fake tears.

Yet you showed no mercy. Sitting there patiently, you inhaled and exhaled softly, causing him to internally flip the fuck out because why were you being so aggravating when the two of you should be walking and pointing out the squirrels fighting over nuts.

And sadly, he was slowly giving up.

"Imagine if I really was crying," he began, offended you did not care one bit. "Really means a lot how unconcerned you are."

But when you suddenly started examining your nails and carefully picking at them is when he totally lost it.

Reaching over to you and moving his arm down your arm, he swiftly intertwined your fingers with his before moving you posture to face him.

His hand was huge.

"No, no-" he started, pulling a face as you gave him a blank stare back. Act natural. Pulling your shared hands in front of his chest, he sulks. "-please, for the love of whichever god you believe in, or if you're an atheist- for the love of you, please talk to me."

Watching him beg for forgiveness has always been funny in the past, but his pleading for attention now makes you feel bad.

"If you talk to me I will buy you breakfast and a very delicious milkshake that will make you extremely happy for the rest of the day," he continues, using his free left arm to wrap around you as his right one still clutches onto your palm.

He's so warm.

Pursing your lips a bit, you send him a skeptical glance. "Oreo shake with a lot of whipped cream?"

He instantly nods, a smile breaking out. "Of course, anything you want."

You look at the car's steering wheel before averting your eyes back to his. "And a red cherry?"

"I'll buy you a full jar of cherries if it makes you happy," he declares.

"And fries?"

Agreeing, he lets out a quick nod again. "With extra seasoning."

Biting your lip, you proceed to think about other stuff you may want with your milkshake and fries. "A burger?"

"My goodness, woman" he sighs, letting go of you and jumping out of the car before running around to your side and opening your door. "I'll buy you the whole menu, now let's go!"

With that, he vigorously yet cautiously pulls you out of your seat and throws you over his shoulders.

"Oh no!" you squeal, trying to find something to hold on to as he begins his journey, walking towards the bridge to start the hike. Grabbing a hold of his neck, you try not to choke him as you place your arm around it.

If you were going down, you were sure you were going to break his neck in the process. At least it would be a learning lesson for him.

"If you drop me I am never talking to you again," you threaten as he continues down a path.

"Said that before and just did it half the car ride here," he begins, moving his shoulder to give you a little fright of your life. "Now I just found out that all I have to do is buy you food and you'll yap again."

Glaring, you choke him a little to which he chuckles. "Didn't know you were into that."

Speechless, you couldn't believe his words. What the hell was he on this morning?

"Put me down!" you exclaim, immediately moving your body so he would lose his balance. Once he did so, you scowl as he ruffles your hair, making it tangle around. "Hey!"

"Can you stop being negative for a few minutes and enjoy the environment?" he asks, pulling his arms up to twirl around. "Just take in that fresh air mother nature gifted us."

Scrunching your nose, you frown. "It smells like rotten eggs."

"Because of the ducks," he pointed out before patting his pockets. "Which we will be feeding with the bread I brought."

Examining his pocket, you shoot him a curious glance. "How big are your pockets?"

"Not important," he states, grabbing your arms and dragging you along with him down the long trail. "What's important is finishing this trail to feel accomplished."

Pouting, you allowed him to drag you along as you miserably dreaded the next few hours to come. The energy you had to give off just for some damn breakfast.

Shame on you for loving food so much.

Encountering many frogs, lizards, and pigeons who loved flying right by both of your heads and scaring you to death, you had long forgotten about how anxious you were being around him. Being distracted constantly had you occupied which was a relief.

Eventually, you two finally found the drugs.

Or the ducks.

Walking by a huge pond, there were numerous amounts of ducks leaping around with their families following behind. It was really cute, but the smell wasn't.

"I wonder if they can choke on this?" Pedro muttered as he pulled out a large bread. Slowly nearing one medium-seized one in caution, he rips a piece apart and throws it. "It is kind of thick."

Taking a moment to check the bread out, you sigh. "Are you feeding these ducks bolillo bread?"

He pauses, not sure why you would care to ask. "Yes and?"

"They have thick crusts!" you exclaim. "And why not just feed them normal wheat bread?"

"Who even eats wheat? It's bland." he protests. "Plus, this is leftovers from my dinner last night."

"They're ducks! They don't care," you argue as he shakes his head.

"Just imagine if you were a duck," he began, making you huff in annoyance as you just knew he was going to say something ridiculous. "Wouldn't you love to eat this nice bolillo bread, maybe visualize a torta with some carnitas, onions, avocado, can't forget the refried bean-"

"The duck is choking!" you squeal and stare in fear as the poor duck starts to wheeze sharply.

Pedro's facial expressions drops as he sees the poor duck quacking in agony. Nervously rushing to its side, he looks up at you. "Do we pat its back? CPR? Call 911?!"

Pulling out your phone, you type away to find answers for your current problem. It was indeed true that you aren't supposed to feed ducks bread.

Especially thick Mexican ones.

"Give it mouth to mouth if you want chlamydia," you read aloud, causing Pedro to instantly leap away from the duck as it hastily begins to lay on the ground. "Wait, you get that from birds, not ducks. Silly me."

"Ducks are birds," he discloses, trying his best to softly pat the ducks back, finally giving it one powerful swat to help but instead the duck ends ups being thrown a few feet away by his force.

"Do I look like a fucking duck doctor?" you spit out, making him look up confused.

"You mean a veterarian."

Ignoring his last comment, you continue scrolling through more of google's suggestions, finally finding some information that may help. "You need to press down on its chest with 1-2 fingers or just give them water to drown it down."

Immediately grabbing the duck and placing it on its back, you worriedly watch over the duck from Pedro's shoulder as he works his fingers on the poor animal.

However, no luck was given as the duck was beginning to look weak and drowsy as pressure kept being projected on its chest. "We need water!"

Running towards the pond, you motion for Pedro to follow along with the duck as you look for a safe ramp to lead the duck onto. "Let's just lay him down near the water and splash him with it."

"He?" Pedro asks, stopping his movements. "But it looks like a she-"

"We are not arguing over its gender when its literally dying in your arms!" you exclaim, causing him to quickly nod and follow the ramp you found towards the water.

Gently, Pedro lowered his arms near the water with the poor duck taking over his hands. Trying to move the flow of water towards its face, he calls you over. "He's not accepting it, you need to scoop some up in your hand and pour it over his beak."

Rapidly nodding, you do as he says and take a handful and try not to spill it before gradually pouring it over the duck's beak. This water was not clean, but at least it was something. Nothing was happening until your third scoop once the duck began to actually swallow some of the water slowly.

"I-I think it's working! We did it!" Pedro cheered, trying to give you a high-five, failing incredibly as he somehow managed to lose his grip and dump the poor duck hard in the pond. "Oh shit!"

Squatting down, you try to reach for the duck as its face was buried underneath the water before Pedro's body slams into yours, causing you to fall into the dirty, cold pond.

The feeling of thick, muddy water overtakes your body as you lose all sight of air. Quickly moving your arms up and down, you rise back to the surface to find Pedro with his hands over his mouth and his jaw dropped.

He knew he wasn't going to hear the end of it.

"Fuck," he nervously muttered to himself before reaching out for you. "I am so so so sorry, the leaf made me slip AH!-"

He couldn't finish his sentence as you yanked his arm down with you, pulling with almighty to get him to land in the pond. The weight of the water going down with his body diving harshly against it, you knew he was completely soaked.

And probably pissed, but its okay. It's what he deserves.

Waiting for him to come up, he finally did so in seconds looking very unhappy. It made you delighted.

"You did that on purpose!"

Scoffing, you splash him and watch as he gasps harder. "You do a lot of things on purpose."

Using both hands to release bigger waves, he splashes you back. "Don't splash me!"

Growling, you slap his chest as he clutches your wrist afterwards. "You're so lucky I forgot my phone at home."

Gasping, you feel one of his hands fly underwater. "I didn't!" You hold in your giggles as he shuffles frantically before moving his gaze back up. "Wait, I never removed it from my glove department. Be fortunate I forgot it because if you destroyed it I would've made you walk home."

Furrowing your brows, you push his shoulders and make him move back by the force of it. "You're the one who started it. We're gonna get duck chlamydia now!"

Rolling his eyes, he pushed you back, causing you to fall under the water. Once you caught your breath again you notice the way he glares at you. "That's not even a thing."

"Just another STD to add to your list," you jokingly mumble to yourself, sure he didn't catch it.

You were wrong, again.

Launching himself onto you, the two of you fall underwater as he shoves you body around in revenge. Swimming back up, you gasp for air while slapping his arms off you as he tried blocking all your attempts.

Wrapping his arms around your waist, he clings his face on your shoulder as he proceeds to try and bring you down under but somehow you manage to wrap your leg around his thigh, causing him to lose his strength and fall backwards with you on top of him.

He sure has one strong grip.

Now, not saying you were going to kill him. But this was your chance to kill him with no witnesses.

Well- besides the ducks, but they wouldn't quack a soul.

Regaining his energy, he lifts himself back up and holds you up, about to drag you under again before you crazily oppose while shaking your head, "Don't! We're gonna get sick!"

"That's not a very sincere apology," he tilts his head, his wet hair scattered across his face as he awaits your alibi.

Huffing, you fight back a rude remark. "Do you understand how much poop were swimming in right now? These ducks are probably laughing at us by how much they are quacking."

Swiftly looking around, the two of you check the surrounding ducks around who blankly stare back. The older looking ones hollering nonsense, probably making plans to kill you and Pedro.

"I bet their releasing their chlamydia right now," you cry, hiding your face in his shoulder as he bursts out laughing.

"I don't think that's how it works."

Glancing down on him, you're surprised by his strength. He's been holding you up by your waist for so long you're shocked he hasn't dropped you accidentally yet. "Let's not find out, let's get out."

"You're forgetting something," he smiles, staring innocently at you, knowing damn well you can't leave without his release. "And I wouldn't wait this one out because I am pretty sure I feel toads swimming near my feet."

Instantaneously, you clung onto him tighter in fear as you could imagine the feeling of something swarming around your body. It was like hundred of spiders crawling all over you, you needed to get out of here.

Pulling yourself back up, you place your hands on his shoulders as he impassively stares back at you, waiting. "Fine," you huff. "I'm sorry for claiming you had STD's before."

Pedro just stays there, not moving an inch as if he wants more. Groaning, you knew he wasn't going to give in so easy. "And I am sorry for stimulating the idea that you would get duck chlamydia," you apologize. "But you can get E. coli."

That didn't help as he just helplessly eyed you, not impressed with your poor excuses of your so-called apologies. What more did he want? You can't necessarily beg on your knees, you're in the water!

Whining, you knew you had to pull out your sincere face. You just knew your Oscar-worthy acting was about to award you freedom.

Softly, you move strands of hair stuck near his eyes away from his face and brush his hair back before quivering your lips and looking down upon him in sorrow.

He has really pretty eyes.

"I'm really sorry," you start as you push your face inside his neck and lock him inside your arms. "I know you don't have any infections, you don't even have visible rashes or sores to prove it."

Pedro finds your plead for forgiveness charming as you squeeze him tighter. He begins to release you until he hears the mutter of your "-that are visible."

"You couldn't hold it in for a few more seconds?!" he whined at how fast you went back to insulting him.

Sighing heavily, you slap a hand to your face. "It's hard!"

Suppressing a laugh, he unwrapped his arms around you and let you get back to the sidewalk. But once you were back on your feet, you looked down to find your body filled with random pieces of dirt, sticks, and grass. "Ew!"

"You're not sitting in my car," Pedro states, waving his head side to side to release some water from his ears.

"You're worse than me!"

"My car, my rules."

Frowning, you weren't sure if he was kidding or not. "Well, you almost committed first-degree-murder so if you don't want people to know you must be my personal servant."

His instant glare turned into confusion as he abruptly moved his attention back towards the pond. "Where did the duck go?"

Widening your eyes, you forgot that you had a helpless duck in your hands minutes ago before your splash attack with Pedro. Scanning your eyes from the sidewalks to the ramps to the pond, you noticed a duck floating nearby. "I think that's them."

Pointing at a duck with the closest familiar colors than the rest, you felt Pedro let out of sigh of relief. "Thank goodness, I would have felt extremely guilty if she would have died."

"It could be a he," you snap back.

He was about to protest but honestly, you were done for the day. You just wanted to take a long and hot shower and knock back out. Not only that, but you ruined your cute running shoes you gifted yourself months ago for your work out journey.

You never really wore them, but it's the thought that counts.

"We can get breakfast another day," you plead to which he didn't argue over because he really wanted to remove the unknown substances off his body asap.

He wouldn't admit it, but he was genuinely scared he may have gotten duck chlamydia .

"Okay, but no sleeping in the car," Pedro states as you exhale loudly. All this and you still weren't allowed to doze off, how cruel is life at the moment.

Walking back to the car would've went down smoothly if the two of you weren't given disturbed looks from strangers and your clothes weren't clinging uncomfortably to your bodies, especially your shoes.

Luckily, Pedro had towels in his trunk and set them down on the seats. "God, I am definitely going to need a deep cleaning after this."

Slipping inside, your hands find the heater and turn it on full blast. Not only was it freezing outside, but your drenched state made you feel like an icicle.

Setting off back to the road, your mind begins to wander back to the question that has been flooding your mind lately. Craning you neck towards his presence, you make out his comfort state. Cool, he's calm.

Here goes nothing.

"So," you start, awkwardly playing with your hands as you try to make direct eye-contact with him as he turns his head to you. "Why did you visit the other morning?"

Lifting a brow, he pulls a face. "Other morning?"

Biting the inside of the cheek, you try to sound composed. "Yeah, remember? You dropped by around 6am-"

"-and you thought I was Lady Gaga, slammed the door on my face, and went back to bed?" he finished, grinning while finding your eyes again. "You mean that day?"

"Well if you knew what I was talking about why make me recall those mortifying details?" you grumble, leaning back against your seat. "And I thought you were a cat."

"I figured, I always questioned why Jules would ramble on about buying Lady Gaga a new electric litter box until I connected the dots," he confessed making you let out a small chuckle.

Yeah, you clearly remember how upset Jules became when Lady Gaga neglected the expensive box.

"But if you're curious, it wasn't because I wanted to go hiking," he smiled, referring to the current day.

"Then why?"

He paused for a minute, checking his mirrors before switching lanes. "I'm not really sure."

Tilting your head a bit, you express curiosity as you glance back. "I don't understand?"

Laughing lowly, he slightly shook his head. "I did wake up real fucking early that day," he started. "Maybe around 4am? Which sucked because I must've gotten like 3-4 hours of sleep."

"So you decided to wake me up so I could feel your pain?"

"No," he stifled another chuckle. "To plant trees."

Squinting your eyes, you become very confused. What is he talking about? He noticed your puzzlement immediately. "You know, go early in the morning to different areas in the city and help dig and replace old trees to plant new ones."

This whole time you were flipping out, wondering why he randomly came early in the morning just to find out it was because he's a nature boy who wants to help out the community?

It was very sweet of him to be as helpful as he was, but you were a little disappointment it wasn't something more.

"That's why?" you ask and he nods. "And why no warning?"

"Well, I was going to call but I figured all that studying you had done the evening before may have knocked you out early," he confessed.

Yet he still made you wake up early today knowing damn well you were exhausted last night. Strange.

"Why me?" you giggle. "I'm not your typical nature girl, Joon would've been perfect for the job."

Shrugging, he leaned his elbow on his middle console. "I thought about asking him, but to be honest I didn't want to pay for any damages he may have caused."

That was a very accurate insight of what Joon really was, clumsy. The amount of times he accidentally dropped his coffee cups, tripped over wires backstage, and face-planted against glass doors would be too much to count on both your palms.

You're surprised he hasn't broken his back again- but still glad he hasn't. That would really suck.

"But have you thought things over yet?" Pedro glanced your way before looking back forward. "About Canada?"

Stiffing up a bit, you move your eyes to the dashboard. You weren't dreading this conversation, but you didn't want to talk about it.

This was a situation where it was a win but also a loss.

Win as in gaining incredible experience, loss that your parent's wouldn't be pleased, it was in a different country, and you'd be missing out on your social life for almost a year.

"Not really," you admit and sense from the corner of your eyes his shoulders fall. "Still indecisive, as always," you try joking to lighten the mood.

Sending over a tiny grin, he mirrors your same expression, doubtful. His face turns concentrated again, leaning closer to you before he shuts down again, ultimately rejecting whatever idea he had going on.

The rest of the drive back to your place went by fast. The two of you made little talk about each other's life and how school was going for you, but he already knew so much already from past encounters.

Pulling up to the red curb you loathe, you crack a scowl as he only returns a smirk at his doing. "I will personally send my property manager to you so she can threaten you."

"I do love threats," he beamed, watching as you reach for the handle before stopping you by his voice. "-but I had fun this morning, despite our little uh...catastrophe," he chuckled, looking down at his clothes.

"I totally agree," you grin. "Dirt just looks so good on me."

He sniggers lightly before slightly sobering up. "But seriously, think about the offer," he begins, nipping at his lip a bit, not trying to put too much pressure on you. "It'll be good for you, you know- your future."

Sighing, you nod. You knew where he was coming from since he's been doing this for so long, but you were still young and had a lot on your mind.

"I'll think about it," you smile, reaching for the door handle and swiftly getting out, missing the way his smile slowly vanishes.

Taking your usual step back, you send him a farewell wave but he does his habitual goodbyes as he gets out of his car and grins to you. "See you around." Laughing, you walk inside the doors and make your way to the elevators, his followed soft "beautiful" being muffled by the traffic on the streets.

It seemed like both of you were screwed.

+

taglist: @thesapphirequeen @floralsightings @wrathofcats @avengersheart @fafik7  @chimchimjiminie16 @adriennemichelle98

[angelisgonnastartchangingurls]

lana on a tuesday

annie hated this fucking woman. she didn't really know what to do about it. fire her as a patient? it was an option. every week, she came in complaining about every interaction in her life, seemingly never connecting the dots. annie patiently tried to get her to imagine her life from the perspective of others to no avail. annie often cried after lana's sessions.

this week, lana was upset about a comment a coworker had made about her manner of dress -- she'd commented that it was very formal, and lana took this as a slight. she told annie that she'd attempted to get several coworkers to wear tuxedos and ball gowns to mock this woman. they had not agreed to it.

"that makes sense to me," annie said.

"why?" lana said.

"because it's a bitchy thing to do."

lana snorted. "not very professional language, doctor."

"sometimes there's only one word for something. well, maybe two."

lana got where annie was going with this. "fuck you."

"lana," annie said. "do you know the saying, 'if you meet one asshole in a day, you met an asshole...'?"

"i'm paying you to say this to me?" lana said. "what are you, fucking 26 years old? what do you know about anything?"

"i have a doctorate in psychology." annie knew she was pushing lana, and she was officially doing it on purpose. "it may not compare to an associates degree from antisocial bitch secretarial academy but--"

lana slapped her.

"oh," annie said.

lana stormed out of the office.

annie laughed, and then cried. then she slowly crossed the hall to mark's office to borrow a cigarette.

"what happened?" he asked.

"patient hit me," she said.

"holy shit," mark said. "did you deserve it?"

"kind of," annie said.

"guy grabbed my throat one time," he said. "a vet with PTSD. hard to blame him. he was very apologetic and we made a lot of progress."

"i'm never letting that patient back into the building," annie said.

"well, your call," he said.

annie took the cigarette he extended to her and went back to her office. she leaned out the window and smoked slowly.

"annie?" a voice called. it was ted. shit. she'd lost track of time and it was ted's appointment now.

"you're a smoker?" he said, bemused.

"no," she said, stubbing it out. "only when i'm stressed out."

"sorry to hear that," he said. "what happened?"

"a patient got physical with me," she said.

ted looked around, like he was immediately ready to go to battle for annie. she was charmed. "it was a woman," she clarified. just a slap. one that i probably deserved."

"i doubt that," ted said.

annie was pulling herself together. "come in, sit down, sorry, i didn't realize the time."

"it's fine," he said, settling down. annie immediately grinned at his pleasant, handsome face.

"it's nice to see you," she said.

ted had good news and bad news -- more of the same old bad news. but the good news was, he'd talked to his daughter and she'd been horrified to hear he'd thought there was any defiance in her gesture. she'd been worried he was mad she was having oral sex with her boyfriend but told him at once it had never occurred to her to cover herself from him. he'd clarified that oral sex was a great thing to be doing at her age. he also mentioned that this morning, while his wife was still in bed, his daughter had come out of the shower fully nude to chat with him.

annie's first instinct was that this was a little weird, but at the same time if ted had asked her to get naked in her office right now, she'd probably have done it, and not even in a sexual way. just a show of general affection and trust.

ted went on to talk about some recent conflicts with his wife. god, this woman never stopped moving the goalpost on this poor guy. he told me that the only time they felt connected at all was when they were fucking, which luckily still happened very often. he said a few nights ago, the last time, he'd watched her sucking his cock and wondered how she could be like this in the bedroom and so unlike it everywhere else. annie was extremely aware that the image of ted getting his cock sucked was making her panties damp.

"maybe you're just really good at sex?" annie proposed, angry at herself for flirting instead of working.

"ha," he said. "maybe."

"i do think you could focus on that," she said. "just... have sex as often as possible. keep the positive emotions going."

"i'm lucky if i can manage two times in a day," he said.

"i've got those pills," annie offered. "i mean, just to try as something for your wife, not for you."

"do you have any experience with them?" ted asked. "i mean, probably not. you're so young."

"i do actually," annie said. "i had a partner who was older, and we used one."

"how did it work?"

"oh, very well," annie giggled.

"no, i mean like, what exactly did he do?"

"oh," annie said. "well, he took a pill just as we started fooling around, and he spent some time going down on me. then he told me to go down on him, and... pop. he um, got hard in my mouth and he stayed hard for a very long time."

"how long? like, ask your doctor if..."

"no, no," annie said. "but he had two orgasms and the first one, i don't even know when it happened," she said. "i just... you know, i realized after. we didn't stop between them."

"that'd be nice," he said.

"yeah," she said. she got up and gave him a sample pack. "don't take more than one at once."

"i like that you shared that with me," ted said. "you know, it's the same trust and intimacy you were talking about with my daughter."

"yes, i suppose so."

"it was not a conscious disclosure, then? not a therapist tactic."

"what do you mean?"

"sometimes, you're a little flirty with me," ted said. "and it feels like a sort of therapist's trick. it's not a bad thing, but just... i was wondering if that's what the viagra story was."

annie grinned. "ted, i do really trust you so i will be totally candid," she said. "i do flirt and disclose things about myself as a sort of technique for building trust or affection with patients. and i have done that with you in the past. but honestly, today i am just being flirty and honest because i had a hard time with my last patient and i trust and feel safe with you. i like you, i think you're a good guy."

"i appreciate that," ted said. "you have had a long day. you want to blow off the rest of our hour and i'll buy you a drink?"

annie sighed. "yes," she said.

sitting across from ted in a booth at a bar, annie felt like he was much more physically imposing. he was about 6 feet for sure, with a broad chest and big arms. that was the part she was noticing more. the big shoulders in the small booth. annie felt tiny across from him in a way that made her shockingly aroused. in her spacious office, she was in control. her chair was taller than the couch, and she always sat very unright around ted, to show her attentiveness and to make her tits look bigger. and because she often had her back to the window, she often felt even more elevated or removed. here, they were so close together. she wondered if he could smell her.

"you have a boyfriend?" he asked.

"yeah," annie said. "ryan."

"what does he do?"

"he's a lawyer for a medical company. we met at a conference."

"that's kind of cute," ted said. "a little cross-industry romance."

"well, it was a drunken hookup at first," she said.

ted laughed.

"but then it just... kept going."

"how is it going now?"

"well, i don't really feel like he ever asks me anything about myself anymore," she said. "and i always initiate sex. he's always distracted. i'm throwing myself at him."

"lucky guy," ted said. "sounds like he's not as good at compartmentalizing work from life as you are."

"yeah," annie said, seeing ryan more charitably all of a sudden. "i mean, i was trained to do that."

"do you think that ever backfires?" ted asked. "does it make you kind of an emotional robot?"

"when i'm on the phone with my mom," annie replied.

ted laughed again. "you are very funny."

annie was imagining what it would be like if ted fucked her in his car. would he even be able to move with shoulders that big?

"what do you like best about your boyfriend?" he asked.

"he's so good with people," annie said. "remembers names, knows how to hang with anybody, he's the life of the party in a classy way," she said. "what do you like best about your wife?"

ted thought. "her pussy."

annie laughed. "honestly, i hope that's ryan's answer too. all of my holes."

she put her hand over her mouth in shock -- she hadn't meant to say something so dirty to ted. he was grinning.

"how do you think he'd rank them?" he asked.

"ass, mouth, pussy," annie said immediately.

"pussy last?" ted said. "no way."

"well, he gets my ass least often," she said. "and i know i give really good head."

"but i'm sure your pussy is immaculate," he said. annie's mouth involuntarily opened a bit. "especially in the summer when you shave it all clean for him?"

"well i shave it for bikinis," she said. "not him. i keep it smooth underneath, for him, all year."

"i love that about you," he said. "a busy professional woman but you know how to take care of your pussy."

"i sure do," she said.

"i love talking about this with you."

"me too," annie said. "but honestly my panties are so wet i really need to go to the bathroom and take them off because i'm very uncomfortable now," she said.

"be my guest," he said.

annie fantasized he'd follow her in. she'd have done anything he wanted. but he didn't. she went back to the booth and did a little performative shiver.

"where are they now?" he asked.

"in my purse," annie said. she lifted them out just slightly.

"red," he said. "nice."

"i know we're really crossing some lines here," annie said. "but i hope that's OK. i hope that you don't think less of me as a therapist."

"I can see you both as a therapist and as a woman," he said.

Annie mentally began to chew on the ambiguity of that statement.

"We're both going to go home after this and fuck the shit out of our significant others," he said. "And we've helped each other, in that way."

"Yes," Annie said. "Yes."

They said goodbye shortly after. Ryan texted Annie to see if she was coming over. "Not tonight," she texted. "Feeling a little under the weather."

She went back to her apartment and masturbated for four hours.

[nonwal]

each half blind without a mirror

(AKA, the time travel shadowgast fic that I'm not going to finish writing. So here's the beginning and the plot outline. Be warned, it’s not technically an unhappy ending but it’s certainly bittersweet, with a lot of alternate timeline MCD.)

Bren Aldric Ermendrud does not like Vergesson Sanatorium because deep down, he knows that he belongs there. He's been a little mad for a long time, but he's never told anyone about it. It has yet to interfere with work, and that is what matters. If his dreams are filled with smoke and blood and vague prophecies in his own voice, that is his own business. If he is occasionally convinced that he is being watched--well, who is to say that he isn't? Trent has eyes everywhere. But it does mean that he answers the summons to the sanatorium with more trepidation than strictly necessary.

"Sorry," Astrid says when he arrives just outside the gate. "I didn't know how to explain the situation over Sending." "It's fine," he says mildly. "You can apologize by explaining now." She hesitates. "I don't know how to explain now. We captured Thelyss. He tried to kill Master Ikithon. And as far as we can tell, he's gone mad." That is…a lot to take in. Bren quashes something that might be hope or might be simmering fury. "You need me to verify that it's him," he guesses after a moment. "He was your contact, and our master is very interested in learning why he is here and not in a grave in Ghor Dranas," she says dryly. "Ah." Bren connects the dots now, recognizes what she isn't saying. Essek Thelyss had been Bren's charge, at least until he’d been executed after his plans to steal the beacons were revealed by an unknown party. It was an inconvenience that Bren has…already paid dearly for. But if he’s faked his death, if he has made an attempt on Ikithon’s life--that reeks of a conspiracy. Bren is in danger. But isn't he always? "You said that he's mad?" he asks as Astrid guides him inside. "We thought he was faking it at first. But even under a Zone of Truth, he speaks contradictory nonsense." "Such as?" "He is convinced that Vess died due to a disagreement with a cultist over a city made out of meat, that I am the Archmage of Civil Influence, that he is friends with a cleric whose powers come from a talking weasel, that he successfully stole the beacons but they were given back, that he was born in 715 PD and he is one hundred thirty-seven years old--" "He doesn't know what year it is?" "He's aware that it's 832. He insists his math is right anyhow. We've already tried removing any curses he may be under, healing, a Greater Restoration--anything we can think of. He isn't a shapeshifter, he isn't under any magical effects. He claims that it was him who got executed, and the execution did kill him, but also that he's never died before." She lets out a frustrated breath. "He also insists that he is perfectly sane, but what madman doesn't?" "Interesting," says the madman walking next to her. "Do you have any theories?" She sighs. "I was hoping that you would," Astrid admits. “He’s your responsibility.” "I watched him die. I verified that it was him. This could be a clone? Or some other attempt at transferring his consciousness." "Did he mention dabbling in necromancy?" "That really isn't the sort of thing he would have admitted to me." Their conversations were always more…complicated.

(and then the outline below)

Bren gets summoned because the Assembly has caught Essek Thelyss during an assassination attempt on Trent. The same Essek who definitely got caught and executed by the Dynasty before he could steal the beacons. The same Essek that Bren had been working very closely with

Bren talks to the captured drow. It is Essek. It is not the Essek that he knew

he eventually determines that this Essek is a time traveler who has been stuck in the past and has subsequently altered this timeline, and that this Essek knew him in the future timeline

he asks Essek if the future Bren came with him to the past. Essek admits that yes, the original spell was supposed to bring them both back to the past for a short period of time and then back to the present, but for some reason Essek got left behind and the timeline didn’t loop smoothly the way they had intended

he asks Essek if the future Bren came with him to save his parents. Essek asks how he knew that

Bren knew that because for the past seventeen years, he has been working under the assumption that he was delusional. When he killed his parents, he wandered behind the house for a minute and “hallucinated” seeing them escape through an unblocked window and disappear with a stranger, and thus he never broke

Essek is relieved to know why timeline didn’t loop correctly. I think I know why you got left behind, too, but you won’t like it, Bren adds

Essek demands to know anyway. Bren refuses to tell him until he explains what happened to his Essek. Essek explains that in the timeline he’s from, the theft of the beacons led to a war. He tried to convince his current self not to steal them, and failed—so he planted the right evidence to prevent the plot a different way, leading to his own death

“I’m not surprised that you couldn’t convince him. You are very different.” “In a good way.” “No, not in a good way. I think I loved him. I do not think I would love you.” “…I’m sorry.” “No, don’t be. I assume you loved that other version of me, ja? I killed him, too. So we’re even. Fair play.”

it turns out this Essek was not left behind. The spell failed because after Essek teleported his parents to safety, Bren saw Caleb inside the house, panicked, and killed him. The spell failed because one of the people who cast it died

Essek is. A little despondent over this, understandably. He isn’t stuck in a shitty AU past where everything is going wrong, futilely hoping that Caleb will come back again and rescue him—he’s stuck in the only remaining timeline, and Caleb no longer exists at all

Essek proposes a pact: in his timeline, he helped defeat Trent Ikithon. If Bren frees him, he can help do the same in this one

Bren agrees. They flee together, and go into hiding, begin plotting for the years ahead. They are both mourning a version of the other that no longer exists. They have both murdered each other’s lover. They are both wearing the face of each other’s lover. It is not easy company

Essek knows how to track down most of the Nein, still a year before they all meet. He doesn’t know exactly how Bren could play the part of Caleb—but Caleb did leave behind letters

Bren goes to visit his parents. It’s weird. He’s missed them, and an insane part of him has never really believed that they were gone—but they have the letters from a version of him that never came to be. Much like Essek, they were hoping he would be someone else. (They try to be happy for him regardless. But he can tell they thought he would be a better man.)

the Mighty Nein still meet in roughly the same fashion, except Veth and “Caleb” just…have a strange tension between them. Things start to deviate at Alfield. The ruse gets harder to maintain. Beau is paranoid that someone is following them, watching at a distance. In Zadash, Bren manages to keep his mouth shut during the Zone of Truth but has a panic attack prior to the Victory Pit and has to tap out because he knows that Trent would be watching

the beacons were never stolen, though. So there is no broken tower, no declaration of war, no push to get out of town as quickly as possible. Bren convinces the group to head north, but—they get as far as Bowlgate, and things properly escape his control. Essek has to intervene. They explain the ruse, the time travel

people are, to put it lightly, kind of fucking pissed

they do still go to Hupperdook, now with Essek. It’s a little bit tenser than the original timeline, between the Nein being extra wary of Bren and Essek, and Bren and Essek still being wary of each other

no one gets kidnapped. Molly doesn’t die. They take out the Iron Shepherds and recruit Caduceus. And then it’s…boat time? Caleb didn’t leave great notes about that and Essek doesn’t exactly know what went down, but they do end up becoming pirates

they get the Happy Fun Ball and the Mighty Nein have to restrain Essek from immediately returning to explore it. He tries to explain that the key to taking out Ikithon was found there, but Bren would rather bide his time than risk the Archmage’s Bane with a less-seasoned adventuring group, and takes the Nein’s side. They finally begin to bond with him after the incident. Essek tries (fails) not to be jealous

they discuss next steps as they sail back to Nicodranas. There is no war, no stolen beacons, no burned Felderwin and kidnapped husband to bring them over to Xhorhas. They decide to still tackle the Angel of Irons cult, this time keeping Yasha safe

they arrive at Nicodranas. To news of a war and a burned Felderwin.

Essek holds it together for long enough to verify that Veth’s entire family made it out okay (having never begun working for the Assembly) and then he fucking falls apart. The Nein have never really bonded with the weird time traveler who keeps trying to manipulate them into following a specific path, simultaneously following his own agenda and wishing they were future versions of themselves—but they try to comfort him as best they can

Later, when everyone else has gone to bed, he says to Bren, “It was all for nothing. I didn’t stop it.” “The way I see it, this means the war—the one you remember—wasn’t your fault. It would have happened without you. Silver lining?” Essek is quiet, a very unconvinced sort of quiet. Finally, he says, “I got myself killed. For this. And it wasn’t enough. He died for nothing—I was him, once upon a time, I was almost exactly him except that I never knew you—“ This is the first time that Essek has ever expressed proper regret for killing the Essek that Bren has always privately thought of as his. Softly, he says, “You didn’t know. It’s okay.” “I killed him for nothing. It is not okay.” “Ja, well, sometimes you kill your mirror self and you entire life goes to shit. I wish I hadn’t killed your Caleb, either, but it’s a little too late for that.”

they reach a new understanding of each other after that. Not exactly romantically—they have sex, a few weeks later, and both agree that it doesn’t feel the same—but at least they become tentative friends with occasional and probably inadvisable benefits

the war did not happen over stolen beacons, and there is no beacon to return in order to end it. They stay far away from the Dynasty, struggle their way through the Happy Fun Ball with Yasha’s help, manage to kill the heart first and take down Obann when the ritual to free the Laughing Hand fails as a result

there is no peace treaty. There is no way to end the war. They go out of order and tackle the hag next, turn Nott back to Veth. They get the residuum for the Blooming Grove, Fjord becomes a paladin, Travelercon is still a clusterfuck

the war gets worse. They discuss the possibility of stealing the Pride’s Call beacon as leverage, and head back to Zadash to begin investigating—and then Yasha disappears

the first thought is more Angel of Irons shit, but when they scry on her they see her traveling with Cree. Turns out Lucien didn’t need Molly to be dead to come back

there’s a race to the north, trying to stop them, trying to unpossess Yasha. They don’t read the book, don’t get any eyes—but this is so far off the original timeline that Essek doesn’t know what to expect. They go through Aeor, they take down the Tombtakers, they reach Cognouza, they fight Lucien-as-Yasha…

but unlike Molly’s body, Yasha doesn’t die

things go bad. Very bad. Molly goes down first, and then Caduceus when he tries to reach the body. Then Veth, then Fjord. When Jester goes down, with Bren on his last legs, Essek manages to get within range for a plane shift—but Beau refuses to leave Yasha behind

Essek Thelyss and Bren Aldric Ermendrud return to the Material Plane and prepare for the end. But nothing happens, no hungry flesh city arrives to wreak havoc. The war is getting worse, far bloodier than the one Essek remembered—but nothing beyond that

eventually, they return to Aeor, find their way back to Cognouza and the remains of their friends. Turns out, after Lucien killed Beau, there was nothing left to keep Yasha standing. Very tidy, how that one played out

They return to Aeor. The ice is preferable to flesh. Bren asks, “Did any of it go like this, in yours?” He already knows the answer, but he wants to hear it again, just in case Essek has a different one this time. “No.” Essek sits on the ground, not bothering to float. “If we could raise one of the clerics, maybe—“ “Caleb was a transmuter.” Ah. And Bren is not. “We could find a powerful cleric—“ “With the war the way it is?” Essek’s voice is brittle. On the verge of tears or on the verge of an angry outburst, he can’t tell. “And the chances of getting everyone back—“ His voice breaks. Tears, then. “My apologies. It seems the plan to kill Ikithon has fallen through.” This is such a stupid apology that Bren has to laugh at it. “Do you really think this is still about killing him, for me?” A quiet sigh. “I’m sorry, Bren.” “Ja. Well. It could be worse?” Essek glares up at him. “How, exactly?” Bren doesn’t actually know. “We’re both still alive? And Veth’s family is safe, and Jester’s. And mine.” Even if he is a stranger to them, and a bit of a disappointment compared to who he could have been— Bren wonders if it was worth the trade. The war, the Mighty Nein, the miserable elf curled up on the ground. He sighs. “No. You’re right. This is—yours was better.” And, “The chamber that we stumbled across. That was how you two…?” “Yes. But your—“ “Maybe we should go back one last time. Tell our better selves to leave things as they were. Untie the knot you made trying to form a clean loop.”

they do go back, just a few moments before Caleb and Essek arrive. Essek immediately launches himself into a hug around Caleb, explains that he got left in the past because Caleb died—and already, the other Essek is convinced

Caleb asks Bren if he was happy. If his parents were still alive. Yes to the latter, not really to the former. They read your letters, you know. They were so proud of you. But—a little less proud of me. I didn’t—it’s a long story. I never broke. My name is Bren.

Caleb asks if they’re here to stop him. If he should let it be. They say yes, and also Essek had to kill his past self to stop the beacons from being stolen but eventually there was a war for other reasons and because the Nein didn’t have any beacon there was no political leverage to stop it and it’s still getting worse and now every member of the Nein is dead—

look I just think there should be a lot of wizards hugging their traumatized alternate universe selves here

eventually Bren—seventeen years old, about to make the worst decision of his entire life—arrives in the distance. The older Bren asks if they should stay close or not. He’s only seen it as an illusion. Caleb tells him that he doesn’t need to watch the real thing. The pain won’t fix anything

they move into the woods, so far away that they can’t hear anything. Eventually there is a faint light at the distant horizon from the blaze, but nothing more. Bren and Essek—the Essek who got left behind—begin to fade into a pair of dark voids. Echoes. Just alternate timelines, shadows of something that never happened

Caleb and Essek return, a little haunted by the versions of themselves that they could have been. They go destroy the T-dock. It takes them years to tell the Mighty Nein what happened

for the rest of their lives, whenever they cast Resonant Echo, the echoes are always the same ones

[alexissara]

Gwitch and Minimum Viable Queerness

Trusting companies to make queer art is always asking for heart break even when it really and deeply seems like they made some queer art. However, despite my love for Gundam: The Witch From Mercury it must be said there is plenty of issues with the show that pointed towards the direction they have gone now that we've entered the post release era.

In the magazine Gundam Ace they edited our a writer stating that Sulleta and Mio were married. They apologized for that statement ever making it in to begin with on Twitter the X gonna give to you dot bomb with this.

This obviously lead to tons of angry fans and queer folks but it wasn't like this came out of nowhere. Despite some people saying it's just "western brained losers" or something that thought there was queer bait in the Witch From Mercury there is something that queer people forget which is that most straight cis people literally have no brain cells. They espically have an inability to see sapphic relationships as real or valid.

Gundam The Witch From Mercury was explicit, more explicit than a lot of media but they intentionally excluded the three universal signifiers of romantic or sexual love from the show despite it being centered for all 24 episodes around the Sulmio engagement. These three signifiers are an "I love you" "I Love You too", a kiss, or fucking. Gundam is a toy commercial for kids so while sex is probably not on the table it isn't actually even off the table for Gundam given the series history has had off scene sex and bad stuff too like adult women trying to seduce like a 10 year old boy. So like these shows aren't afraid to do some shit. Many say that Gundam doesn't do kisses that is a lie, Z, 00, Seed, and Iron Blooded Orphans's all have done kisses. I love yous also happen across the series, the end of G Gundam has a special love attack that blows up the last boss.

This is all to say Gundam: The Witch From Mercury activated a strategy corporate media called minimum viable queerness. In order to get the gay dollar, to seem progressive, whatever it may be a company will do as little gay as they can get away with to get the gays actively invested in their art. Ultimately, their aim is to have it be blaringly obvious to queer folks but invisible to the hets. The show also did the minimum viable amount of women making sure the men had utterly meaningless fights near the end just for women to be on screen less. These fights involve men who are not either of the main two girls getting mad at each other for some kind of connection or action towards one of the girls. These take up a significant amount of the second seasons run time not to mention one of these men got a full episode devoted to him. Meanwhile the main couple of the show was away from each other for the vast majority of episodes, almost never in the same room and almost exclusively on somewhat bad terms.

In the show Sulleta is the main character but in season one she is mostly piloting against men with one fight against a pair of girls near the end. Chuchu is given sidekick pilot status and lives to the end but she doesn't get her own highlighted battle ever unlike a side side character in Guel's brother who gets a major fight against his brother weighted against the fate of quite zero and Sulleta and Ariel fighting. Which comes after Guel fought Shadiq for no reason which came after Guel fighting Sulleta again for Ariel which came after Guel trying to survive in a mech when he was stuck on earth earlier. Guel was in a mech 1 more time than Sulleta was in season 2. The two other witch girls die in their first and second time respectively of being in a gundam in season 2 and the second of the pair gets maybe a word in with our main character her whole existence and never talks to our secondary main character at all. The action is still in large part being given to men even in the woman centric series.

And in this "queer centered" story we see very explicit delectations of feelings from Guel, Shadiq, Petra and Lauda which are all heterosexual ontop of all the adult characters being hetero, implied hetero E5 with Nora dying for considering being with a man and E5 sexually harassing Sulleta. The series overwhelming overcompensates for it's queerness by aggressively pushing straightness and in particular having other main characters want our lesbians heterosexually.

This does not mean that the writers or animations didn't want to be more explicit or that they did a bad job. they did a great job but we cannot know what is Namco Bandai and what is Sunrise. We just can't but it seems given recent statements that likely Bandai was very hands on in controlling the show. Not to mention giving it's first woman lead series a much shorter run time than most other Gundam series got and intentionally closing it off from an easy sequel series despite it being the most profitable series ever for them.

It appears to me as if Namco Bandai's intention was to convert a bunch of lesbians into gundam fan and throw mild gay bait at us to keep us coming now that we converted, far less explicit than Sulleta and Mio but attempting to ride it out in good faith and have us enjoy the men shows that appealed to boys to not break their delusion that they are making a boys toy for boys. Feeding us right into more Gundam Seed is like trying to choke out any potential life and I think we're gonna see a decline in Gundam sales following Gwitch representing the betrayal of these sapphic fans but more so simply the lack of interest in the bar being lowered.

As fans of Gwitch we need to demand better, it does work, we've seen companies fix statements about Sailor Uranus and Neptune before and other similar instances. We can also make them see if they want to reach the high highs again we need the great shit we get in Gwitch but then even more that the minimum we'll let them get away with is far more than the last time.

If you enjoyed this post consider throwing me some money on Patreon to help me make actually queer art without corporations controlling my voice. I'm hoping to write a bit more about minimum viable queerness in the future but I wanted to really just talk about this while I was mad about it and get it up there. Anyway, back to the writing mines with me, hope you have a great day and go out there and be gay.

[icantwithstormandsilence]

One thing I'll never get over is how Storm & Silence could've easily been so much better if Rob Their(the author) wasn't afraid to actually write a compelling story.

Don't get me wrong, I adore the whole concept of '19 year old Victorian girl dresses up as a man to get a job'. But it's just so poorly written that I think about all the ways the story could be better when I'm in the bus going home from college.

I mean, that's how it is with books, they will be criticized no matter how good or how bad it may be. But then again, this is a Wattpad book. You can never expect too much from a Wattpad book. Every character feels very two dimensional after the first book that every other book after that is just plain fan-service.

The first book is genuinely good, except for the hyper feminist way Lilly is written to be. The author doesn't even bother to add conflict between any of the characters. The ONLY conflict that we ever get is Lilly arguing with Rikkard how she's capable of anything even if she's a women in every single book. It keeps going on and on like this that it just gets boring.

And the way Lilly's intelligence is suppressed makes me mad too. Like in book 3, she literally deciphers a map to find the treasure, but god forbid she recognizes her fiancé's(whether she likes him or not) initials on the waste disposal file and connect the dots on how he and her previous guy(I forgot his name) might've just disappeared. That right there could've been a good conflict. She recognizes the initials, realizes what Rikkard might've done, get angry and argue about not wanting him to interfere with it, then having to find an escape from her next fiancé and choosing to go out of town with Rikkard against her will instead of telling him why bcs she doesn't want a new waste disposal file.

Not to be mean, but the author is a man. At the end of the day, the way female characters are written by men will never be realistic. I know there might be real people out there like Lilly, but the way her "inner feminist"(I hate when she kept saying 'mY iNneR FemIniSt iS prOtEstiNg' stfu) is written truly makes me want to pull my hair out. It will never be same as writing a story from a women's perspective when you already know what it's like. I'm not saying that men are incapable of understanding the female experience, I'm saying that it's stupid and annoying when a man pretends he does.

Also the lack of historical accuracy boils my blood. Rob claims to have done thorough research on every historical details yet somehow Lilly and Rikkard goes on top of the Statue of Liberty despite the story taking place around 1840 and the statue starting its construction in 1876.

SNS was the last and final original story I've read on Wattpad. I really wish I could go back and keep myself away from that app and read an actual book. But it's the only place I could go to when I lost my sanity. Let me know how you feel about the book. I know there's barely anyone in the fandom, but please tell me your perspective.

P.S. can someone tell me where Rob used the slur. I read about many people talking about it but I cannot remember or recognize where it is.

[9w1ft]

hi, how would you explain why Taylor never defended Karlie from any of the brown scooter accusations?

hi,

i would assume it’s because it would have drawn attention to taylor and karlie at a time when they weren’t ready to publicly reconnect, especially after the masters were bought.

i think one thing scooter had been banking on was being able to profit from taylor’s coming out, and potentially from karlie as well because she was still contracted with scooter at the time. if taylor and karlie had publicly reconciled or been publicly okay with one another, that would have put more interest into taylor’s back catalog and karlie’s ventures, which would have meant more profit for scooter.

taylor once said in an interview that sometimes she goes out of her way to prove a point. i think the context of that line was a question about her deciding to re-record her music, but i think it’s also related to this. i think taylor and karlie both would have wanted for scooter to not profit off of their plight. so, they stayed the course that they had been staying for years, and continued not interacting publicly.

to this point, here is the letter she wrote to shamrock, who had been hoping to buy taylor’s catalog from scooter and work with taylor:

as one can see, taylor is very clearly stating that she won’t let scooter profit off of her in any way, even indirectly. i think it’s worth mentioning again that this would include boosting karlie’s earnings in some way (which she doesn’t need anyway because of her own net worth). scooter’s company would probably have been getting about 20% of karlie’s earnings at the time, i would guess? which i think at her peak would have meant over a million per year in his pocket. taylor and karlie both feel like stubborn people and i just think they sacrificed progress on the public friendship front out of principle. and it’s a hit they could definitely take. i think this takes priority for them personally over any public reunion we may have hoped for during lover era. revenge is a strong motivator.

in addition to this, i have wondered if they used the situation (where karlie was still contracted with and going to company events with scooter at the time) to their advantage in some way. doing things to make it seem like they were estranged and to lul scooter into a false sense of security around karlie. i think the lines from mad woman and vigilante shit are telling: “does she smile or does she mouth ‘fuck you forever’?” / “the master of spin has a couple side flings, good wives always know” / “she had the envelope where you think she got it from?” to me, it’s pretty clear where and from who taylor got the dirt. and it low key blows my mind that so many people don’t connect the dots.

oh and, here’s a post i’ve written about some jewelry that karlie wore at the time that i think might be symbolic / emblematic of what went on:

[setzappersto-pew]

Alright, I'll get on my soapbox again.

In regards to "the kids seem to know everything": this stems from the shorter runtime. There's not enough time to have them hem and haw and be confused for many of their encounters. This may be a detriment to the suspense and the tension, but not enough for me to cry foul. Plus, they're smart! They've prepared or have been prepared for this! It was a quick cut from Santa Monica to Crusty's, implying they took Hermes' cab and he told them about the secret entrance. Hermes probably told them about Procrustes as well. As funny as this scene in the book was, it's okay to gloss over it a little, especially for Disney's ratings. Additionally, all of Percy's confusion on the book, while accurate to the book character, was meant as a teaching moment for the reader to learn about mythology alongside Percy. The viewers here are still learning, but they have less time to do it in. So exposition and expedition is necessary.

It doesn't seem impossible or improbable that Percy would jump to accusing Kronos. Ares had talked about Kronos before, Percy already maybe knew a little bit. Nearly all his dreams take place in those vast sandy dunes around Tartarus, so he made the connection that the voice in his dreams (who is not Hades, he realizes) was coming from there. All the pieces were there, they were shown and not explicitly laid out, and Percy connected the dots. They also "connected the dots" and think Clarisse stole the bolt, so clearly they don't know everything.

In regards to Sally: do you mean to tell me that a single mother of a stubborn, impertinent, ND child who is in mortal danger due to being a demigod would never get frustrated with the situation or with her 8-year-old son who is throwing a stubborn fit in the backseat? Any mother under normal circumstances might. It's clear she has anxiety about Percy's safety, it's clear she's stressed about how best to help him. She has to make hard choices, choices that will upset Percy in the moment because he's 8. He's internalized the guilt about being difficult already (through no fault of either of them), and to a troubled 8-year-old mind it might feel like everyone including your mother is against you. So she snaps a little, has to be a lot more firm because he won't budge and is being an impertinent little shit by locking the door. BUT...what this tells me, what her talk with Poseidon tells me, what her interactions with Percy in episode 1 tell me...is that she made an effort to be more patient and to ensure Percy never felt that way ever again. Percy does not seem mad at her for anything, like he is in the moment in the flashback. He feels so safe with her. She's firmly on his side, makes sure he knows that's he's not broken, he's a miracle, she doesn't want them to be apart but it has to happen. 12-year-old Percy understands, 8-year-old Percy doesn't. They showed us the past and the present to show the development of Sally's parenting, to show us the hard choices she had to make, to show us her humanity, to show us both her and Percy's struggles and how it colors their relationship. In the book, we see Sally through Percy's POV, so she's more idealized. Here, we're taken out of the POV and can see Sally struggle.

I know critical thinking is not as easy for some people. If it's not spelled out obvious, some just don't get it. If so, this is not meant to tell you to just do better. This is directed at those who bitch and moan at these disparities and complain about the lack of "show, don't tell". There is A LOT of exposition by necessity. Some things are glossed over and expedited for brevity's sake. But when the examples above are shown and not told, when there are implications in the subtext, y'all don't pick up on it and claim that it came out of nowhere or it's out of place...and that must mean that this show sucks and is terrible, right? 😑

I'll say it again: judge the show for what it is and what it does, not for what it didn't do or could have done. You're allowed to have your own opinions, but please try to form them based on actual constructive criticism.

[wowowwild]

Ok Justice For All. This is not going to be exhaustive or comprehensive but here we go.

The first case we don't really need to cover. It's a tutorial, it achieves what it sets out to do, there's not a whole lot else. I really like the amnesia concept and while I wish more had been done with it (like being used in a regular case), I understand the mechanical service it does for a tutorial.

Our second case is solid. It was really fun to figure out exactly what happened and if you've been following my 'game posting' tag you saw exactly how much fun I had. I kind of wish we had gotten more out of Misty, but that wouldn't really work in this medium (lol get it). Obviously I love Pearly I adore her I would be her slave she deserves the world. Phoenix, stop showing her the horrors, please. I just really have to keep coming back to how fun this case was to solve. Sometimes the correct things to do mechanically make no sense to me bc I don't leap far enough with my logic, but this case I was able to do pretty easily which tells me it was very well written with the proper foreshadowing and such (and I am a sucker for properly laid ground work). I like that we get more Fey lore. I am devastated that I guesses the twist ending but I had no one to witness it. It's probably my favorite case this game.

Bigtop is a mess. We're going to ignore the Regina age problem for our sanity and pretend she's 18 bc wtf (I knew this but just now [as I was typing the end of this paragraph] connected the dots that in Japan 16 is viewed as our 18 and they just didn't localize her age). I really like Max! He's my favorite character to come out of this case and I will never let go of my wrightica/galactright ship (is there an official ship name?). He thinks Edgeworth is dead, it could happen. Also! Diversity win! The guy who murdered you is wheelchair bound! But actually I really like the concept of Acro's motivations, driven to madness and murder by grief. I like it less when we come back to Regina's canon age, like even when she's 18 Acro should still view her as a child and personally I could never hold something like that against a child. It was decidedly and accident and not even remotely her fault. It's not her fault your brother was swayed to do something idiotic by the power of boners, my guy. Also Regina is not ok. She needs help and the only one who realizes it is Moe. Everyone else is 'enabling' (that's not exactly the word I'm looking for but it's in the ballpark) her. Her own father was likely the worst offender. Moe may not be funny (I actually liked his jokes) but he is genuinely a great guy.

Our last case: Extremely well written. I went into this already knowing the outcome, how could I not. Despite this, I was so worried about Maya everything else went out the window. For a minute I actually convinced myself of the possibility that Adrian had done it (I am so sorry for everything we put you through, but it was for Maya). This case really put me in Phoenix's shoes. I'd imagine if you don't actually like Maya, this might not do for you what it did for me, but if you don't like Maya I don't know how you've managed to play all the way through the second game. Of course the good ending where you toss Engarde to the wolves (the assassin he hired) is iconic. That's what you get. Again if you've been following my 'game posting' tag you know I had strong feelings about Edgeworth through this. Most of them were due to the stress of Maya being kidnapped (I seriously got waaayyyyyy too in character during this case), but also he was smug as hell for no reason when he showed back up. He was like 'new me!' and refused to elaborate. Phoenix is not a mind reader, my guy. He won me over again so we're good. Also the dinner? At the end it literally says "I wonder if there's anything I can give him to express how I feel...?" I think we can all imagine my first thought... actually I don't trust people to put thoughts in my head, my first thought was a kiss. (You actually give the whip and Miles yet again thinks Phoenix is a mind reader, will it ever end?) I can't forget! Gummy's official stint at Wright Co! My one post about him being a Phoenix Wright weird girl was really popular and then my second (about this case) also got some notes, so clearly this is the Gumshoe content we're all looking for. (Can they please stop firing him though? He's going to end up dead on the street from starvation.) I thought it was really something how much Phoenix trusts Gumshoe. He said

The scene with Franziska and Miles at the end was sorely needed and it was fantastic. They're both growing and healing from shared trauma and it's beautiful.

Over all... I forget, is this the one people don't like out of the trilogy? I liked it. The first is obviously iconic and banger after banger, but I do like this one. Overall it's definitely worth playing and very enjoyable. (Idk bc I haven't tried it personally, but there's a post going around about ds estore emulation or something where you can play games from the ds estore for free now that it's closed, so as far as I know you can play it for free now.)

[thekrows-nest]

(anon)

I was going to ask - if Dove harming innocents would give even Krow pause - what would happen if for some mad reason Dove went after Luke and Jazzy? *kicks Dove’s ass for it* wtf Dove why

But I do have an idea. Three possibilities actually, with varying likeliness.

So I’ve been thinking on Mary who hasn’t got much attention yet. Hmm. I am curious about what her job is?

I might have an idea of her big regret. Maybe. I suspected and the info that came next did kind of strengthen the line of thought.

TW: abuse

I don’t know how intensely religious or strict her raising was. Or whether she experienced homophobia, whether racism was directed at her girlfriend Camila, or whether those precipitated moving to the city. (Mary moved a decent distance away at an older age than people traditionally finish school or leave home/age out of care/become independent, implying that something may have happened. The city is also a safer place to be out.)

I’m hoping for Mary’s sake that the move was mostly about broadening her horizons. Maybe Camila encouraged Mary to have a fresh start, or her second income made moving affordable.

But yeah :( I think Mary is processing some painful controlling crap. Maybe even just memories. You did say she was very sheltered, that the environment taught things that were hateful and not Christ-like. Distinct possibility of religious trauma and homophobia.

I think she’s possibly also coming to terms with her actions and beliefs while she was deep in the religion she was raised in. Everything is in a harsh new light.

Now she’s questioning her faith she realises that she harmed someone in the past through following those teachings. It’s also possible she left them behind in that environment… or yes, failed them. (There’s nasty corollaries implied in that.) There are a few ways in which that could have played out but there’s not enough info to narrow it down.

In extreme cases she may even have cut or lost contact so she can’t see this person to apologise. Whether she wouldn’t be allowed to, it’s not safe to go back, or she doesn’t know where they are!!! It’s possible that the person she feels she failed is her younger self. But maybe not… /Krowspiracy theory

In writing it out I, uh, yeah, now have a Krack theory about her raising/childhood

Or maybe I’m completely on the wrong track! I’m spinning elaborate webs rather than asking for facts.

Everything I come up with is kind of reaching, potentially spoilers if somehow right, or baseless. I’m connecting dots that might not be there. Best to wait for more info.

There’s a lot unknown about her family, her school, relationships and timelines.

Krowspiracy anon. Bruh. Why do you hurt me like this?

Now, as for if, for some ungodly maddening reason, Dove were to go after not just Luke BUT also Jazzy. Yeah, Krow is NOT having that. He may not necessarily kill Dove, but he would incapacitate them and immobilize them. They would DEFINITELY be extra secure in the cage. "Y-you didn't leave me a c-choice. I d-do love you. But. I love them t-too. Even if it's you, I will never, NEVER, let h-harm come to them."

As for Mary and her job, I see her as working at a cozy bookstore or the like. One of the things she did a lot growing up was reading (even if what she could read was limited), and once she's gone out on her own, a whole world of literature was opened up to her. So she consumes all kinds of books with ravenous delight.

As for the other points...

You've really nailed a lot of points. Krowspiracy Anon strikes once again.

I'll give you some little crumbs as a treat, and for you to muddle on for your next krack theory.

Mary comes from a large family. Large family. And it has a major role into her upbringing, her personality, and ties into her... regretful feelings.

[aoflameandco]

GrimmNell: poems and theme music

Even though I was sure that I covered everything possible in my big GrimmNell study - suddenly I realized - I totally missed the poems written by Kubo and songs he picked for his characters! Time to fix it!

But let me warn you at first – guessing the meaning of lyrics is always more subjective than a typical manga analysis. There are no facts, no right interpretations. All I have – the hints from Kubo, the «stories» he associated with his characters. And in this meta I will try to connect Grimmjow’s and Nelliel’s stories, the cores of who they are, to see how they would potentially work together. Shipper-biased analysis? Yeah, sounds about right!

So, who is Mr. Grimmjow? Kubo’s poems give a perfect summary. The Sexta was lucky enough to get two of them: in vol. 24 and vol. 32. The first one was rather short –

And it basically said – this is Grimmjow, he breaks everything what gets in his way. He is Destruction, duh. Deep enough for his first introduction. 

However, the line Grimmjow would gladly vocalize doesn’t touch the hidden core of his character - the story of his past companionship. But the second poem let us take a closer look inside his soul.

Even though he is the king, Grimmjow has no peace, he can’t stop running. The shadows he avoids – the memories or thoughts he wouldn’t like to dig - motivate him to keep himself busy, to prove his name over and over again. And yet he is alone in this endless survival race.

Grimmjow cared deeply about his comrades. It was heavily implied in manga, and it was literally stated in CFYOW novel:

The voice of his comrades resounded within his head; his comrades who had called him king and had later given up on their path to evolution. They, who had once become his own flesh and blood, now gave rise to Grimmjow's bestial instincts.

Grimmjow was mad when they gave up for him. He got his chance to move “to a distant beyond”, but who said that he ever wanted to walk this road alone?

The loneliness is an important motive of his theme song as well. «Step Inside» is basically a provocative monologue from a person who would like to tell a story of his life to someone – but nobody «steps inside his world». Yeah, he is fine with it, he never changes, he got everything and yet - his desire to find a listener is hard to miss – even though he rather dares than asks for it.

And I got everything, just leave me in pain! Step inside my world and I will tell...

Always the same. I try to bring back stories to tell you, gotta step inside but you don't...

If Grimmjow's song only implies that he wouldn't mind some company, Nelliel's theme song is a frank love confession. Kubo associates her character with Gloria Estefan's "Wrapped". And hoo boy, the lyrics are extremely romantic.

I carry your worn disillusion When my pathetic confusion Kept me from speaking the truth

The song's heroine acts as a natural giver, she tries to cheer her lover up, heals their soul. There is a distance between them, they can't be always together and her partner seems to be not very expressive-

I keep every phrase barely spoken That from your lips may have broken free As you give me your love

But she still enjoys every moment and feels that together they can overcome everything. In general - the song portrays Nelliel as a very gentle, hopeful and caring person who tries her best for her love.

Kubo's poem keeps this image but adds a very important point - Nelliel is a giver, but also a fighter. She quickly adapts and does everything to protect a person she cares about.  

These lines were most likely about Ichigo. After all every poem was a part of a certain manga volume and touched the related plot. And Nelliel literally transformed into her adult form and fought for our strawberry. However, he wasn't her destined partner: according to Kubo, Nel felt very grateful towards Ichigo but that's it. Also he doesn't really act like a grumpy lover from Nel's theme song. So, who could it be?

Time to connect the dots and activate the ship biases. The songs and poems implied that Grimmjow is carrying his burden all alone but secretly seeks a company while Nelliel is ready to embrace the person she loves and help them to overcome all their hardships. Grimmjow is a very complicated case who can't just open up easily and so is the alleged Nel's partner. He respects power and she is ready to fight for her happiness. 

In the end we get a very nice compatibility, isnt it? Of course I really doubt that Kubo ever connected Grimm's and Nel's songs, but the coincidences are really amusing and actually hit the right direction for GrimmNell 's development (especially in the novel). After all Grimmjow already accepted Nel's company and started to open up more, while Nellilel - well might be still far from being in love - but obviosly cares about him and wants to understand him better. So, who knows what kind of upgrade their bond will get after a timeskip~

P.S. And the last sweet coincidence for today. Nelliel's theme song “Wrapped” was originally performed by Gloria Estefan in Spanish and was called “Hoy”. The lyrics were a little bit different, even though still dedicated to her lover. My favorite part is:

Y una acuarela esperando

verte pintado de azul.

Yeah, yeah, I know it's probably about the lighting, but funny how Nel is waiting for someone “painted blue”.