Yk i wish medical professionals could actually act fucking professional and understand that being in constant pain is not something that 'everyone has' or 'just growing pains'. I want them to recognise that I'm not just a whining kid who wants attention, or an unhealthy kid who just needs to exercise. It fucking pisses me off. I'm also pissed because I feel like my level of pain doesn't warrant any help compared to others. I know some people with chronic pain are bed bound 24/7 and because of fucking medical gaslighting I feel like I'm not worthy of a diagnosis because I'm not also stuck to bed forever. Like Im with my chronically ill friends who have to deal with such bad pain that they probably will never be able to leave their house and I feel for them, but just because I'm not 'as bad' as them doesn't mean I'm just a pussy bitch.
19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)
Pictured: me, laying on the floor. I could introduce several here but I think I’m gonna have to go w/ the no brainer and say Aaron atm, if you’re one of my close friends and you’ve known me for a while you’ll have known that this is an oc i’ve had for a VERY long timeOriginally he started out as a joke character, the stereotypical highschool cliche sk8r boi, but as time went on his character just morphed and changed into what he is today, without him I don’t think I would have met a lot of the people I’m still friends with today, plus he’s a huge comfort character to me honestly. There’s several more who fit this category like Sirius or Etsuko but I just really like talking about Aaron.
27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song?
Sirius!! He was originally actually at least somewhat inspired by Gasoline though he’s seriously (heh,,,,heh) diverged off his original character paths/arcs and honestly I’m happy for it because I love what a little shit he’s become.
45. A character you no longer use?
So,,,,SO SO MANY,,,,I’ve dropped so many ocs it’s not even funny, I guess if we’re going off one that I no longer use but I really miss I’ll have to say my one Dangan Ronpa oc who was a SHSL Medium and went by the name of Haruto. I reaaaally wanna bring them back I miss them ;;;
Another would be Michael Harland, Emilio Andres and Damian Lockhardt, the three of them were set in this group sort of post apocalyptic roleplay and, I lost contact with those people and with that I just, stopped using the them, they’re still on my mind from time to time thoI could also list a whole bunch of old DR ocs tbh
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I been doing some thinking, about chronic illness and shit. I haven't gotten a diagnosis for anything yet, so I'm left to search for myself. I wonder if I might have fibromyalgia, Juvenile Arthritis or Pots. But recently, one of my friends caught COVID and it turned into long COVID. He has similar symptoms to me but not exactly the same. It's just making me theorise if potentially I have Long COVID, or if I had long COVID and it triggered the existence of something else.
The only thing is, I know that no medical professionals seem to take me seriously. Coming back to my point on my friend, In school, he has a newly adjusted timetable that allows him to only do half days, instead of a full six hours. I'm not sure if he is professionally diagnosed with Long COVID or not, but I really wish I was also able to have half days as sometimes, I just cannot go through with my day due to the pain I'm in or the fatigue I have. But I'm not diagnosed, which means I either have to have my parents backing me (and they are but they wouldn't back me so much as to allow me accomodations within school unless I'm diagnosed) ot get diagnosed which takes God knows how long. I don't want to seem like a lazy bitch because I literally don't even appear to be in pain to almost everyone, I mask it very well and I feel as though if i do try to get benefits in school without a diagnosis, i will be seen as a faker or just trying to skip school.
Luckily, my 8 week period of the exercises is nearly done, so I'll be able to tell my physio that it hasn't helped and has actually made me feel a bit worse and hopefully then I'll be closer to a diagnosis