#middle school thug life

[zwolfgames]

Yandere Platonic MHA x child!reader

Requested by: jocru046

Part two/sequel of this.

(Warnings: kind of kidnapping, kicking a child, creepy overbearing behavior, yandere in general.)

(3rd person POV)

Life sucked.

No really, it did.

Atleast for you, that is. Y/N, not even a last name. Just a small kid, no parents or guardian. You can't even remember how thar happned. Did you have parents? Did you just spawn in one day? Only god knew. No wait, that didn't exsist. Trust me, you had begged that god for help and received nothing.

Never having gone to school or kindergarden you were far behind other kids. Now, as a illiterate 8 year old with no hopes or dreams you live on the streets. Luckily, your quirk kept you alive.

A simple concept. You cried pearls. Or well, thats all you knew of it. It would be sad if that was the only thing you could do but you didn't care at the moment. Survival was your top priority.

So, when you ran low on money, you cried and collected the little pearls. Selling them to who-ever you could. It worked... well enough. You were a kid, you definitly got scammed a lot.

So that brings us to this faithfull moolit night. One where you were drawing on an old newspaper. You couldn't read it anyways.

All was calm untill you began to hear footsteps. Loud frantic footsteps and heavy breaths. Like a group of humans running from a bear.

You held your breath and shrunk into your make-shift dumpster house as the footsteps came into your alley.

You expected them to just run past, like everyone always did. But no...

They stopped... Right in the middle of the alley.

It was quiet for a moment, just a moment. As if they were scanning the space.

"Oi! Kid. Come out, right now! We know you're here!" Some loud man screamed. A sudden crash of a thrashcan being thrown against a wall was heard. You gulped.

Surely they were thinking if some other kid, right? I mean, surely there was some other poor orphan child in this alley besides you?

Nope.

Just as you finished the tought the lid of your dumpster home smashed open and before you could even gasp one of the men had a crushing grip on your upper arm. Ripping you out of the dumpster as if you were nothing but a twig.

"Got it." He huffed to his boss as this henchman, or whatever, held you beside him in the crushing grip.

"Who are you? Let go! You're hurting me!" You growl and bare your teeth, a trick you had seen the stray dogs use on weirdo's.

"Shut it. Hurt them." The boss man said harshly. He looked disgusting. Like some vile criminal. Whatever his quirk was wasnt helping his appearance. This man had the skin of a fish yet the appearance of a man...

The thug holding you complied and bashed your head against the rough brick wall. You let out a pained sounded and started slightly crying at the pain. Your head feeling heavy as you saw stars. If you guessed right you were even bleeding.

Two small pearls streamed down your cheeks and fell to the dirty alley ground with a small sound.

The fish man grinned, revealing scary, shark-like, teeth. "Thats them. The pearl seller. Take em away. We'll be rich by the end of the week!" He laughed and you were dragged along. Your head still spinning.

This was going too fast. What was happening?! Who were these people? Why did they hurt you?

You began realising the situation when their black van came into vieuw. They'd stuff you in there and you'd never be seen again! You knew it! You've seen it happen to kids before!

So in that moment you let out the most blood-curdling scream of despair. Shrill and loud, just like you wanted it.

The chance someone would come to rescue you was small, seeing how humans were.... But it was worth a shot.

The man holding you growled in anger and kicked in your stomach. You almost fell to the ground if it wasn't for his deadly harsh grip on your arm. The air knocked out of you.

The thug was about to throw you into the dammned van before you were suddendly back on the ground again.

No longer having your arm crushed. Now curling up into a pained ball on the ground as you cried. Shiny perfect pearls rolling down your face.

There, infront of you, stood some darkly dressed man. Somehow, his scarf somehow floating...

Just a moment ago all those bad men were ready to drive off.... and now they were either knocked out on the ground or too pained to move...

What was this... mosnter? How did he do this? The scary looking man came closer to you, taking light steps.

You could see his face now. Some ridiculous yellow goggles on his eyes. His long, messy black hair swayed with his steps. Overall, he didnt look too bad... maybe a bit sleep-deprived and dead inside but oh well... What made him scary was the fact that he just wiped out this gang of men that wanted to kidnap you.

The unknown man kneels down in front of you. Not too close, not too far.

He observes you. Just faintly, you can see his eyes stare into yours from behind his strange yellow goggles.

"Are you alright?" He asks after a long silnece. You had alreadt seized your crying... now just a pile of little pearls on the ground.

"Im... fine." You whispered. In a broken choked voice. Who could blame you? You just released the loudest scream you ever had in your short life.

"Sounds like a lie. You're bleeding kiddo." The mysterious man sigh and reaches his hand towards you, to wich you flinch and scamble to your feet to take a step back.

The man frowns and stand up aswell, way more intimidating at his full height.

"There's no need to be afraid. Im here to help." He said, keeping the distance as to not scare you further.

This man... He may be scary but he didn't feel the same way the thugs on the ground felt.... More... safe.

How could some-one so scary feel safe? You wondered.

The man seemed to notice your questioning look but said nothing, merely making sure you didn't run off. You were injured and he needed the whole story.

"Whats your name?" He suddendly said, his voice soft and caring, as if he was speaking to a small child- oh wait, you were a small child.

You hesitated for a moment but decided to just answer before he bashed your head in like he did with the thugs.

"Y/N..." You answer softly. Not looking him in the face anymore.

"Where are your parents, Y/N?" He asked calmly. That question stunned you for a moment, maybe you should have expected it but somehow... no-one had asked you that before.

"...Non-exsistent." You answered bluntly. Not a hint of care for the subject in your voice.

The man had expected that but not in... such a careless way.

"I see... Would you trust me to help you?" He asked. This man only asked questions, how annoying.

"...No." You answered after a moment of silence. The man seemed baffled, as if no-one he had rescued had ever said 'no'.

He opened his mouth to say something yet before he could a groan was heard from the fish man on the ground behind him.

He shot into action at the mere sound and before you knew it you were off the ground and in his arms.

The wind blew into your face before the man tucked your head into his chest. Now you had no clue what was happening.

But judging from the loud air sounds, you were going fast as fuck.

As the surprise faded and you came back to your senses you started struggeling, to wich the man simply tightend his hold on you.

"Don't struggle, im taking you somewhere safer." He said calmly, tough the wind made it hard to hear. Was this dude doing parkour or something? You were getting sick from these abrupt movements! But i guess that did make you struggle less.

You tried to speak but this mans clothes were smothering your face. That weird scarf fluttering against your head as the man jumped and ran.

After an agonizing whileof running and wind he set you down on a chair. No wait, this was a car...

"Mister, what do you think you're doing-" You quickly asked but he held a finger to your lips and buckled you in. You were utterly confused.

First, some thugs tried to nab you for unknown reasons. And now this random man shoved you into his car?!

You gulped in slight fear yet looked around the car curiously, never having been in one before.

The man seemed satisfied with your silence and got into the car, taking the wheel and driving off.

"I know this is going too fast for you, but you'll be alright. Im EraserHead. A pro-hero." He side-eyed you and you simply looked up ahead. He was right, this was going too fast. And a pro-hero? This slobby dude? Really?

You said nothing and simply stared ahead. This was too complex for a child. You felt as if you should be scared but he had infact saved you... untill he grabbed you himself but eh.

EraserHead eventually stopped the car and got out before walking over to your side and unbuckeling you. Taking your hand as he leads you into a huge building.

"See, this is U.A. You've heard of it, haven't you?" He smiles slightly down at you. Those stupid goggles off of his face now so you could actually see his eyes.

You wanted to say no... but decided just to nod to avoid any boring info.

EraserHead led you into the grand building and after an endless amount of twists and turns you arrived at some sort of hospital room.

There, at a desk, set a tiny old lady. She turned her head and greeted EraserHead before turning her attention to you. You didn't know what it was about her but she immeadiatly had your trust.

"How are you feeling sweetie?" She asked softly and observed your still bleeding head and multiple scrape wounds. Wich now that the adrenaline had stopped working, hurt quite a lot.

"I-Im fine." You meekly uttered, shrinking into yourself slightly. Eraserhead was about to comment 'Lies.' Once again but he didn't have the chance as the old lady shot him a glare.

"Is it okay if I help you dear?" She smiles at you. It was quite comforting since she wasn't way taller then you. You nod hesistanly.

The lady somewhat kisses your forehead and you can littarly feel your wounds being healed. Wich was really really weird!

The lady nodded and pat your head before gesturing to EraserHead that you were now fixed.

He nodded back and took your hand again. Seeing as this man claimed he was a hero, you'd seize your struggeling..  for now.

After another long trip of twists and turns youre back outside. Now walking on a nice path with a bunch of tall buildings next to it.

Where the hell did you end up?

"Students... This is Y/N. They'll be staying here temporally, untill I figure out how to solve their living situation." EraserHead ordered a group of weird looking teens. Wait, stay here?! Your consent was not asked!

Your eyes widen and you instictivly hide behind EraserHead. An action he found just adorable, tough he would never admit that.

The students stared for a moment untill you were suddendly swarmed.

Some pink girl squished your cheeks and you felt observed by everyone.

"Y/N, you're such a cutie. How did you end up here hmm?" The pink lady asked, to wich you had no answer. Luckily, EraserHead still exsisted and shooed the teens away.

"Y/N almost got abducted by a gang. They got hurt so I took them here. They don't seem to have parents or a guardian so untill that is sorted they stay here. If I hear even a single complaint from the kid, you're all dead." He sneered and glared at some spikey haired blonde specifically.

You gulped at all the attention and took a step backwards only to bump into some green haired guy.

He smiled such a friendly smile down at you, it was impossible to feel scared. That was what you tought untill he hugged you.

"Whats your quirk, little Y/N?" He asked sickingly sweet as he held you. You bet he tought it was comforting but after today and the amount of grabbing you've lived trough it was not..

"I um... cry pearls..." You uttered weakly. Overwhelmed by all the states and attention.

He nodded and seemed fascinated. Patting your head. "Thats so cool! Do they stay forever or is it temporary? Is it real pearl or does it just look like it? Does it hurt? Are there drawbacks? Do you get tired? Does i-"

"Shut up you stupid nerb!" That spikey haired blonde dude yelled harshly and his hand suddendly exploded.

You yelped in surprise and clung onto the green haired boy for dear life.

Not a moment later the blonde get wacked in the head by EraserHead.

"Stop bothering them. Introduce yourselfs so I can show them their room, they must be tired." He instructs and they did indeed introduce themselves. Some more elaborate then others but hey.... Its not like you'd remember their names anytime soon...

Like he said, EraserHead, also known as Aizawa now, led you up the stairs and showed you a vacant room.

There was a bed, a coffee table, a desk and a chair.... Thats more then you've ever had! Oh my god?!

Aizawa noticed you absolute bafflement and had to surpress a chuckle.

"Will you be able to sleep kiddo?" He asked softly and looked down at you. You slowly nodded, still taking the room in.

He smiled and pat your head before leaving you in the room. Closing the door behind him. You were now alone. And very tired. So you slumped onto the bed and fell asleep.

"Y/N. Wake up. Satou made breakfast." Some sweet female voice called out to you in your sleep. You slowly opened your eyes and were met with... Momo.... And her last name was too long for you to remember, so Momo it was.

Her black hair was nicely tied up and she put some clothes at the end of your bed.

"Come down when youre ready." She smiled and left your room. You were still sleepy but complied. Wow, these people were nice.

You put on your clothes, you had no clue how they got your meassurements but whatever.

You came downstairs and followed the sound of loud teens.

It led you to the dining room in this weird dorm like building and the room went quiet when you stepped in.

You were almost scared you did something wrong untill the students began argueing on who you should sit next to.

You stood there awkwardly before you were grabbed of the ground by none other then Aizawa and he just plopped you into an empty chair.

Now the people argued over who got to sit next to you but you just shrunk into yourself and quietly ate your food. It was amazing!

The students finally stopped bickering by the time you were done with eating, so, it was all for nothing. You jumped of your seat and went back to your room, unsure of what you were supposed, and allowed, to do.

Like that, life went on for some weeks. Tough you had noticed the way the class had become way more clingy and affectionate. You almost felt like some baby-doll they were assigned to take care off and got too attached to.

Your room had slowly been filled up with gifts and toys you had never seen before. But as much as you wanted to ignore it.... you had noticed how your balcony window did not open...

"Kiri, put me down! I can stand, I have legs!" You huff and struggle. Thats another thing they liked to do. Just pick you up.

"Would you rather not have legs, hmm?" He smiled sickingly sweet. It shut you right up. Another one of those scary remarks.

Something was wrong with these people.

You were hoping and praying for Aizawa to finish finding where you would go. Maybe an orphanage? Perhaps directly to a family?

He would never tell you he stopped searching long ago.

As Kirishima carried you to the living room for a movie you noticed everyone had gathered there.

You were put right in the middle, nicely tucked into a blanket. The movie started and you tried your best to pay attention... but you felt more watched then the movie...

You wanted to go home... But there was no home. You used to live in a dumpster for gods sake! They really had you stuck here.

The evening commenced and you fell asleep on the couch. It was way past your bedtime afterall.

The next day, you just woke up back in your bed. Probably carried there by who knows who... Everyone of these kids was strong enough to carry ten of you!

It was a nice loop. Wake up, eat, get left 'alone' for the school hours, play with the teens, eat, sleep. The same, every day.

You were so stuck in this routine. Figurativly and littarly.

You were used to it yes.... But they wouldn't ever let you leave either.

You hadnt tried yet... But each time you wandered outside you were quickly dragged back... It's like you were watched 24/7.

They didn't want you to play outside. It was dangerous. You could catch a cold, or scrape your knee.

All very normal things. You tried to reason. Back when you lived on the streets you got hurt and sick all the time. It made them even more protective.

Soon, you began noticing. The hushed whispers they tought you didn't hear. The hidden cameras. The damm baby monitor under you bed.

They were crazy! They had to be! What was all this? Why weren't you sent away yet?

What were you doing here?

Answers never came. You just had to stay in the loop. Wake up, eat, get left 'alone' for the school hours, play with the teens, eat, sleep.

Thats what they wanted.

You didn't have to know how dear you were to them. An innocent child. Waiting for them at the end of a stressfull day. Smiling and laughing.

You were precious to them.

You didn't have to know. You just had to stay.

None of them had ever expected that they could agree on something this... unhealty. Yet they did.

These teens, with such diffrencess, agreed to keep you with them.

How absurd.

But it happned anyways.

All was fine untill these 'villains' attacked their school.

From what you've heard, it wasn't the first time. You had seen nothing of the fight.

Aizawa had handed you to Jirou and Asui right at the beginning. They had a simple task. Bring you to the safest possible place.

Wich to your displeasure was a basement.

It was dark and you could hear fighting, but you couldnt go see. Couldnt move.

They made sure of that.

You were like their sibling. Their dear younger sibling.

You had suffred enough.

If they couldnt keep you safe now, how would they ever be great hero's?

So thats how security became even stronger after the attack.

No longer were you even allowed to step a foot outside. Not even look at the door if they could help it.

There was always someone with you.

Some nicer then other.... Surprisingly, Bakugo had more chill then Midoriya.

The angry blonde tought you how too cook omelets while the green nerd didn't even let you lift a finger.

Life was dull, repetitive and utterly.... boring.

What was fun if there were no risks? You couldn't go down a slide without someone holding you the whole way.

Couldnt build a pillow fort without Uraraka standing by for if anything fell.... Not even a pillow could graze your skin or panic would break loose!

You could argue as much as you wanted. In the end it didn't matter. You were the child. You were helpless. You needed them.

They made that clear.

And you would never, ever leave.

Where could you go?

It was them.... or nothing.

Have a nice day/night!

Words: 3543

[phuuca]

My friend Jax got me REALLY into Wind Breaker and I binge read the entire manga in, roughly, three days. But every time a new gang was introduced, I always had the idea pop into my head of “What if Sakura joined these guys before Furin?”

So here’s my two cents about how those would all go:

(Gangs ranked from Least Damaging to Most Damaging, based on how they’d treat Sakura)

(Spoilers for the Manga)

Roppo Ichiza - Least damaging

They wouldn't let him join officially, because he's too young. But this is Sakura and he'll throw himself into battle anyway for the thrill of it, but also because he wants to belong and protect. It's who he is at his core. Kanji sighs with unsurprising disappointment because Sakura should be in school! And making friends!! You're committing truancy Sakura. Go make friends, you under-socialized, stray cat!! Sakura being adopted into the Roppo Ichiza is just Kanji and Akihito trying to convince him to transfer to Furin because SAKURA. YOU'RE LIFE IS BEING WASTED HERE. Anyway, he ends up transferring to Furin after hanging around Shizuka and Tsubaki long enough and they beat Gravel's ass. He drags the boy by the scruff, kicking and screaming, and enrolls him in Furin High himself.

Gravel - second least damaging

He thrives, but in a way that’s a little different from Roppo and Furin bc they are a community. However he still, ultimately, gets picked on because of his appearance and is more lonely than he thinks he is. But, for the most part, he's welcomed with open arms because he contributes a lot to Gravel and is super reliable. He takes up a semi-leadership position, despite being one of the youngest members, because of his fighting abilities. Transfers to Furin after Suzuri becomes a Chef Trainee and pushes Sakura to better himself in a way similar to Tsubaki and Shizuka.

Both a Roppo! and Gravel!Sakura would be closest to Tsubaki.

Shishitoren - smack dab in the middle, our true neutral

He’s in a neutral position in Shishitoren. It's neither good nor bad overall, but he’s still incredibly, lonely. Choji picks on him for being strong. Togame picks on him because of their clashing ideals and talking speeds. He’s definitely strong enough to hold his place there and find shaky community, but his own personal morals isolate him more ostentatiously than not. And, with the threat of being kicked out, he's afraid of even being seen as "weak". He still thinks it's some punk shit to be picking on middle schoolers and he'd beat the snot out of Arima and Kanuma, if given the chance. After the tournament, he transfers with a little bit of pushing from Togame.

Shishitoren!Sakura would be closest to Hiiragi (he sees a lot of Sako in Sakura).

Keel - damaging

He withers, but at a slower rate. He’s the only member to not use a weapon, because he thinks bringing a weapon to a fist fight is cowardly behavior. This makes him an outsider and a target of their bullying. He willingly joined under the guise of finding community, but was pissed off when he found out this community is full of petty thugs and bullies. He tried to leave, and was close to being successful, but then he say Nagato and decided he was going to stay and (begrudgingly, with a lot of grumbling and swearing) stay. He stands beside Nagato as an a kind of, tough-loving, older brother/mentor figure. Sakura often takes the brunt of Nagato’s punishments because Nagato is not a fighter and he's "responsible" for hims as his mentor. Even after he fails nabbing the purse, he takes it for Nagato and is devastated, but truly not surprised when they beat up Nagato too. He transfers after Nagato is saved.

Keel!Sakura would be closest with Ren.

Noroshi - most damaging and he’s in active, tangiable danger.

He withers and burns from the inside out. He’s fighting for his fucking life all the time. He’s got scars and a single tattoo. Absolutely lonely and gets sick, maybe, twice every six months from constantly being run ragged and feeling like dirt. There are small streaks of white in his black hair from the constant stress of fighting Takiishi, Endo, and the other Noroshi members in a thunderdome that, seemingly, never ends. Is first seen beside Endo during the Gravel Arc as his shadow, a reopened split lip staining the collar of his hoodie red. He is saved during the war by Umemiya after he clips his head, hard, on the chair Takiishi throws, and is held down until he passes out (Umemiya defends his unconscious body from Takiishi). He transfers to Furin once the war is over and is monitored by the Four Kings, not because they think he’ll betray him, but because Sakura needs guidance on the difference between constantly fighting for your life verses a friendly fun brawl (Endo and Takiishi had him fight them for survival under the guise of “fun”).

Noroshi!Sakura is closest with Umemiya (everyone saw this coming).

In every reality, my boy Haruka Sakura ends up in Furin because all roads lead to Furin. He belongs there, that’s his family, even if some extra steps were taken to get there.

[1000sunnygo]

One Piece Academy chapter 40: Cora san (Quick translation)

[source] [translation index]

Lucci: Donquixote Doflamingo's younger brother, Donquixote Rosinante. Codename: Corazon.

He used to be an executive staff of the Donquixote Family. However, for the last two years, he's 'missing.'

[New world Middle school, Student council]

Lucci: Tell me what you know about this man,

...Trafalgar Law.

Law: I hear you, but what's with the stupid costumes?

Luffy: Y'all sure got style!

Kalifa: To dispel the "scary, unapproachable, unfriendly" allegations against the school council, this.. is the "student council image improvement campaign" proposed by our advisor.

Law: .......... Oh.

Sanji: So, Doflamingo has a brother?

Kaku: Yeah. While investigating him, we came to learn the existence of Corazon, and,

The fact that a former member of the Donquixote Family was you, Trafalgar Law.

Usopp/Chopper: EEEEH????!

Luffy: So you're friends with Mingo?

Law: I get the full picture. I was indeed a part of this Family in the past, and Corazon, no...

...Cora-san is my benefactor, and I got my Life and my Heart from him.

Bepo: Captain, you're okay with speaking about that?

Law: Baseless suspicions are bothersome, that's all.

Kaku: Mind sharing the rest of the story?

Law: Yeah. When I was seven..

I developed an incurable disease that stumped even the doctors.

Without warning, my body caught a sickness that was supposedly eradicated long time ago.

My father, even though he was a famous doctor in the city - couldn't determine its cause.

Vivi: And then, the three remaining years you had according to your father...

Chopper:...was spent on moving to large hospitals that refused to treat you? Was there so little literary background of the disease?

Robin: Prejudices from lack of knowledge in unknown cities, the government's isolationist, unjust instructions.. it must've been terrible.

Law: I cursed the world for it. I didn't want to bother my parents anymore and fled from home, wandered by myself,

then I arrived in front of him. The man who wants to destroy everything, the man I wanted to be like..

I was at the doorsteps of Doflamingo.

Zoro: Just like that, you could've become one of the thugs like him, but that didn't happen...

Nami:.. because you met a certain other person?

{Flashback: Law, look! It's the op-op fruit!

It's a fruit that can save your life! So, eat it! Hurry up, swallow down!}

Brook: So, with the medical knowledge from your parents and the fruit's ability, you treated yourself...

Franky: From Doflamingo's point of view, it happened to be a fruit he wanted for some reason.

Sanji: and he felt out witted by his younger brother...

Usopp: So, a raging Doflamingo appeared before Corazon -

Nami: And at the end, you saw a mysterious light from behind the lockers. What was that?

Blueno: An explosion?

Lucci: That sounds reasonable...

Jabra: A last resort move from Corazon, huh? Well, Doflamingo couldn't just give up.

Coby: After regaining consciousness, Law-san, you held the words of Corazon in your heart, to "meet him at the next town" and kept walking...but the man never appeared....

Law: A person that's gone, is gone. Any other question?

Lucci: None.

Usopp: Who knew Traffy had a past like that...

Luffy: AAAAAH!

Usopp: MAN, THAT SPOOKED ME!

Coby: Luffy san! What happened.. OH RIGHT!

Luffy: I FORGOT TO TELL TRAFFY THE THING!

Nami: Ah, you're right! We got side tracked by the student council...

Luffy: Where's he?

Zoro: He left.

Lufffy: Then let's go to Traffy's place.

Usopp: Do you even know where he lives?

This nerd

Corazon: WELCOME BACK, LAAW!!!

Law: I'm back... Cora san, take off your coat while cleaning -

Luffy: THERE HE IS!!

TAFFY!! WE'RE THROWING A RICEBALL PARTY!

Nami: Luffy! You should ring the doorbell first!!

Luffy: n?

< end, part 2 comes out on December 15th!>

Update: Part 2 translation

[mr2swap]

Football this season

-calm down boy I got A+ on your exam it was a piece of cake for me, you're going to play American football again this season-

I flexed my huge arms to show my intellect and genetic superiority while the obese middle-aged man just looked at me sadly and jealously, he had been in Johnson's body for 2 days and had already stuffed the ass of the captain of the men's swim team and the basketball one, but the pathetic look behind those square glasses was the best reward.

I never tire of showing off those huge arms and those abs that the fags at school fall in love with, now I understand why all those athletes spend all day in the gym instead of in the library.

As an algebra teacher, every year I have a group of young idiots who beg me on their knees in front of my office to help them pass their exams. Qualifying so they could play the field, but he didn't need any of that crap, all he wanted was their lives.

Of course, the kids don't want a tutor or some kind of extra essay, they just want to bribe me with their parents' money to put a D+ on their exams, luckily I've found a way to take advantage of my situation.

I was never very popular when I was young, but now I get to live 1 week a month in the carefree life of an airhead jock while he lives my shitty life as an underpaid high school teacher with a small penis who still lives with mom, I used to believe that football was stupid, It feels fucking great to be the center of attention on the field Johnson hasn't even played a game since he entered high school all he does is train his body so that I get all the glory after winning the game.

From the moment I saw him enter my class I knew I would put my hands on that rather muscular and fucking handsome body, Johnson was always an idiot, most of the time he was talking to his friends in the back of the room or sleeping in my class.

Stealing the portable body swapping machine from the science fair 7 years ago was the best idea I've ever had, ever since then I've been secretly "helping" my students, Even the Principal has complimented me on my good work with the students .

Although being young and having all my hair is great, the part I enjoy the most is watching my students suffer in my body, after we return to our original bodies they become valedictorian, so they don't have to spend another week in my shoes But there are always Jocks or thugs lining up outside my classroom door for me to receive their bodies.

The rumors that the quarterback was found walking into a hotel while holding hands with an obese 60 year old man is just a small price for an A+, like I said my salary is a pittance so I don't see any of it. Bad at taking a little more of My new youth and charging a bunch of old Homos For worshiping my muscular arms, kissing my perfect abs And kissing my huge stinky feet.

Maybe in a couple of years when I retire I'll steal the body of the new master of chemistry, I wouldn't mind "teaching" again for a couple more years as long as I have this machine.

Hello, if you like bodyswap stories take a look at my patreon, I have a lot of more stories, and you can help me keep creating more stories!

[meangirls-imagines]

hi! can i ask for more descriptions of the R in the poly!plasticsverse (i love the character descriptions btw, im just eager) like how tall are they and what music they listen to.

(also hi! is this the appropriate place to send my dumb little thoughts about them? because i know your requests are closed and i don’t wanna like overstep in any way. im also the person who submitted R getting up in the middle of the night to sleep [IT WAS SO GOOD AND SWEET AND CUTE, i love it so much] but i did not expect to get something written, and i felt bad because i didn’t know if that meant i made you feel like it was a request. if it did come off as a request, i am so sorry, i meant to be a gay little shit telling you how much it took over my brain to read poly!plastics)

HI YES OF COURSE YOU CAN SEND IN YOUR THOUGHTS ABOUT THE POLY!PLASTICSVERSE! PLEASE DO!

Y/N is what @yungpoetfics calls "polyjamorous".

She vibes to female rappers with Regina.

She dances to vintage music with Gretchen. (Her and Gretchen have slow danced to Elvis in the kitchen late at night.)

She tries to listen to Kpop with Karen but can't get into it. (She doesn't tell Karen that so she doesn't hurt her feelings.)

She goes all "Thug Life" with Shane. (They showed up to school one day dressed like 2005 John Cena while blasting Tupac. Regina burned those clothes after Y/N wore them.)

She introduced Shane to emo rap. He became obsessed with Lil Peep in two days. (He tried to get face tats but Y/N shut that shit down quickly."

"Lil Peep looks good with them because he's handsome, you would look like you just got out of jail. Do you know what they do to pretty boys like you in jail? They make them bottom bitches." "Maybe I should go to jail." "NO!"

Her and Aaron listen to all kinds of things (but when they are alone, they blast One Direction).

Her and Janis have a similar taste, so they vibe with each others music.

Damian tries to get her to listen to R&B and she likes it.....kind of.

Y/N is a pop punk/emo at heart.

Y/N and Regina will jam to Paramore and Evanescence but Y/N's favorite band is Simple Plan.

Y/N went to a Simple Plan concert when she was a kid and it was the greatest moment of her life.

They got a picture of them meeting Simple Plan and it's their greatest possession.

She listens to classical music with Cady when she tutors Y/N. When they hang out on what they call "mother and son time", they listen to country. (Conway Twitty, Garth Brooks, Reba, etc.)

Regina and Y/N recreated the "Still Into You" video (Regina singing, Y/N playing guitar. Ballons, bicycles indoors, the whole thing) and posted it to their IG on Valentines Day.

It's their song.

Emo band hcs:

Y/N: Simple Plan

Regina: Paramore

Karen: Panic! At the Disco

Gretchen: Dashboard Confessional

Cady: Secondhand Serenade

Aaron: Fall Out Boy

Shane: Green Day

Janis: Avril Lavigne

Damian: is confused

Now, let's talk about about our favorite stoner.

Y/N is 5'6", she's just shorter than Regina.

She's got a scar on her nose from when she was a kid and she was jumping on her parent's bed and tripped over her dad's foot and busted her face. (I'm totally not projecting). And a birthmark on her stomach that is lighter than the rest of her skin (so it looks like a scar). When they get intimate, its her girlfriends favorite spot to kiss.

(She also wrote a song called My Girl for the plastics and plays it when one or all of them are sad.)

[sanzaibian]

I look on with pride as I enter the Tokyo University of Arts, the most prestigious art school of the whole country. I studied so hard for the whole past year, and yet I barely made it through the entrance exams… but as the flowers bloom, it is time for me to enter the next step of my life !

I have had an immaculate record : I’ve had good grades throughout middle and high school, I was class representative in most classes in that time, and I already had a portfolio ready ! Really, I was the perfect candidate for the fine arts studies ! I’ll be able to realize my dream of becoming a great architect !

However, as I approach the steps of the Sogakudo Concert Hall where the Entrance Ceremony is supposed to take place, I am suddenly blasted by big plumes of smoke. The smell is all too familiar to me, as I distinctly remember disciplining a students who were smoking in the premises, and although now I’m studying alongside adults, it doesn’t mean spreading smoke without any care for others shouldn’t be grounds for objection. And as I turn to see the origin of the smoke, I am comforted in my decision, as a small group of the most typical of thugs appear in front of me. A small group of Bosozoku, with big obnoxious pompadours on their heads and leather jackets one of them with a cigarette in his mouth and another with hair dyed blonde.

“Hey, this is a university campus ! You can’t smoke and loiter like that !” I came in strong, but I was a bit disconcerted when they started laughing. Though it doesn’t matter, guys like them always act tough at first. - Hahaha ! Bro, look at this kouhai (junior) tryin’ to order us around !” Mocked one of them with an enthusiastic tone. - Well, what’s he gonna do, is he gonna call security ?” Added the second, with calmer and more objective tone. - Kouhai,” started saying the one who was smoking, looking at me in the eyes. “d’ya think ya have a right to boss me around ?”

W-wait… kouhai ? They may be older than me, I agree, but are they actually students here ? They’re mocking me, of course, such a prestigious academy would never let in rascals such as them ! It just cannot be !

“W-well… I’m sure that you aren’t allowed to disturb other students like that ! It harms public harmony ! - Public harmony, you say ?” Continues the one who was smoking. “Well, you know where I put your public harmony ? In my ass !”

The other roared of laughter. But I am not this easily fussed.

“Well, no matter what, I’ll report you all for trying to disturb the Tokyo University of Arts Entrance Ceremony by your illegal loitering.” I take my phone out. “You see, I can call the police.” I smile as I hear their laughs falter. - I see you’re already going with the nuclear option…” The smoking guy said, as he puts out his cigarette on a nearby wall. “Fine, we’ll go so you’re happy. - Well, great ! And I hope I won’t see you all again !” I can’t help but smile at my easy victory. A bit too easy, actually… but let’s rejoice rather than fear. - Don’t worry, you won’t see us until you need to meet back up…” The smoking one ends, quite ominously. “If you need to find us, Ryuunosuke will go to The Gigs tomorrow evening. - I hope to see you there.” I hear the calmer voice behind me, before suddenly hearing the click of a lighter.

I look back, and see one of the Bosozoku I saw earlier in the group, a lighter in his hand and a mask on his face.

Funny enough, with this ad behind him he almost looks like a graffiti artist… But no, the main thing is… has he tried to set me on fire !? I take a step back in defense, as he raises his hands as if he was innocent. I look behind me and see that the two others have also put on masks, and are starting to make their way out.

“Goodbye !” Says the one who had a lighter in his hand, likely that ‘Ryuunosuke’ guy, as he follows his… gang.

I stand there, quite confused by the whole altercation. What has actually happened ? Why did everything take on a sinister tone at the end ? Why did they say we would meet again ? Why were there these kind of thugs right besides the Sogakudo Concert Hall ? And... er… why am I not in the Sogakudo Concert Hall ?

Oh no ! I forgot everything due to that ! I hope I’m not late…

As I start making my way to the hall, I hear some weird noise as my foot touched the ground. I looked down, and saw a red cigarette on the ground, that was seemingly lighten up until I stepped on it. Great, these ruffians even littered… though the smell is a bit weird, it doesn’t seem like usual tobacco smell. It could even be said to smell… a bit good, actually ? Well, better than most, it doesn’t actually smell good, but the smell is still weirdly present.

But I don’t have any time to waste. The Entrance Ceremony is going to start any minute, I can’t be late to it !

I mean, I don’t know what I expected from some speech by important people, but this one was especially egregious. They were thanking a bunch of people, and patronizing us, saying we were the “future of Japan”… Thinking about it, it was about the same content as third year of high-school, but at least back then the headmaster had some charisma.

So, a bit disappointed, I make my way to Nezu station, to go back home. I might as well have stayed home, the consequences would have been barely noticeable. Plus, I could have bought a lollipop. I don’t know why, but I’ve got the urge to play with something in my mouth.

As I enter Nezu station, I automatically check the cameras and the personnel, and see that they have a dead space where I can go without my face being recognize. I smile, and take the very path I planned out to jump over the fare. As I do that, I get a rush of adrenaline, and make my way towards the platform, reveling in the danger.

But as I enter the train, I realize what I have done.

What has happened to me ? Why did I even think of entering the station illegally ? I have a metro card, and my parents have bought a full subscription, so it doesn’t even make sense ? God, this is the kind of things that those Bosozoku I sneered at would do… Then why the hell am I replicating this kind of hooligan behavior ?

When I arrive at my station, I scan my fare card, quite bashful, before leaving. I may have entered illegally, I won’t leave illegally. Though I must admit the adrenaline was fun. Even though it pains me to say that.

The remainder of my day is spent sulking in my small student’s apartment, going through lollipop after lollipop I bought at the Kombini after eating lunch. Then, the evening, I prepare my stuff for the beginning of classes tomorrow, hoping that my strange outburst of rebel attitude would be a fluke.

And so I drift off to sleep.

When I wake up, I find myself weirdly void of energy.

Usually, mornings are easy, and I’m ready for a full day of class. But today, things just ain’t it. It’s especially bad since today marks the beginning of classes… At least I had the foresight of preparing my things yesterday evening… Well, no matter. I prepare a bit more rice than usual to get the day really started, hopefully it will be enough to wake up properly.

After eating, I go to the bathroom to prepare myself. I put on my clothes, I brush my teeth, and then I search for… something ? I don’t actually know what, but I know I should be putting something in my hair… Plus, where is my comb ? I need a comb. Why do I need a comb ?

Oh no, oh no, the weird stuff from yesterday are happening again ! It can’t be !

I abandon all that searching and go out to class. This time, I make an actual effort to take the metro the correct way, yet during the whole ride the thrill of bypassing the fair kept on nagging me. And when I entered my first classroom, my troubles didn’t even actually end. I had a hard time concentrating on the teacher, especially on respecting his authority. I only wanted to go out, not to be trapped in here doing boring calculations… But I must admit that the classes that were more focused on design and on drawing, letting me do my own damn thing, were actually fun. I was able to flex my creative muscles in a way I didn’t know I could until now. I almost couldn’t recognize myself !

However, let’s be honest, something very weird is going on with me. And it all started with these Bosozoku.

Oh, yeah, didn’t they say that they would be waiting for me ? At “The Gigs” today evening ? Of course, yeah, what’s going wrong obviously has something to do with them. Otherwise they wouldn’t have insisted on me meeting back up with them…

I sigh. I know I’m the duck carrying its own leek, but it’s the only way to understand whatever has happened to me. And the only way to find a cure.

“The Gigs” was actually quite hard to find, but I found out that they were referring to a concert in the Nippon Budokan. Thankfully, I only had one change to do from the Chiyoda line to arrive here, but the whole ordeal of finding the place after many, many furious google searches proved quite frustrating.

But as I arrived to the door of the Nippon Budokan, as convened stood firm one of the Bosozoku I saw yesterday.

“So you came !” He exclaims, with a mix of amusement and surprise. “If you don’t remember, I’m Kowa Ryuunosuke. And, wouldn’t you know it, I have additional tickets !” While saying that, he waves two pieces of paper. - I don’t care. I want the weird stuff to end.” I answer, resolute, and a bit filter-less, I admit. - You know, Tsutomu and I thought that you wouldn’t show up, that we would have to find you. But no, turns out Hitoshi was correct, you would immediately notice that something was off. - What do you mean notice that something is off. You knew that weird stuff would happen to me ? - You know, the show is gonna start soon. I guarantee you’ll love it. You coming ?”

I am starting to get angry at how he keeps on avoiding my question.

“No, I’m not coming with you. I’m waiting to have an answer and a way to stop whatever you did to me.” I maintain as he sighs in answer. - Look. I can help you, but only if you come with me. I’m going in, and if you don’t follow me, you’ll have to fare for yourself in… whatever you found.”

I blush of embarrassment. I’ve lost at my own game, and now he knows I have nothing he’s interested in.

I guess now I must weigh whether sticking with these rascals is worth it or not. The benefits of not sticking are obvious : I wouldn’t have to associate with Bosozoku, and they wouldn’t be able to pressure me to do anything. But if I don’t, I do risk changing in ways I can’t understand, and may even put in jeopardy my studies in more substantial ways than being with Bosozoku. The choice is actually hard to make…

But then, knowing some people wouldn’t be so bad for such a lonely guy as myself… plus, it looks like it’s a Kishidan concert, it’s not a bad band… And tomorrow, I don’t have any early class… Plus, if we actually become friends, I may be able to actually find a way to reverse the effects of whatever they gave me...

“Eh, you know what, I’ll follow you. ‘Can’t that bad to go to a free concert.” I capitulate. - Welcome, then !”

Kowa gives me one of the concert tickets, smiling, likely happy to have scored a victory. He’s actually somewhat cute, gleeful like that. So I follow him inside, and we take our places, ready to listen to what turns out to be his favorite band.

Well, this was a blast ! I’ve never felt more alive than yesterday evening !

I was full of so much energy, it’s actually quite unbelievable ! I’m usually lethargic when we reach 5PM, 0AM or even 1AM the few times I actually stay up this late. Heh, I’d usually actually feel as lethargic as I’m doing right now, waking up ! But Kowa and I really had a great time. From around the half-point to the end of the concert, we were standing up, dancing our hearts off while Kishidan was giving their all. By the end of the evening, Kowa’s pompadour was ruined and I was thoroughly out of breath, but we agreed that it was worth it. The music was a lot more enjoyable than I remember, even more than I would rate video game music – and that’s quite a feat to remove Dragon Quest from the podium. I’m even finding myself humming the melody this very morning !

After eating breakfast, I find myself again in my bathroom searching for something that I don’t have after having brushed my teeth and washed my face. However, this time when I see the contents of my closet, I feel a bit self-conscious. There really isn’t much that’s actually cool, only uncreative dress shirts, plain jackets, mandatory ties and monochrome T-shirts. Why did I ever think this would even pass as clothing ?

I freeze. This is not me. I never cared about how I look. Only being comfortable and acceptable in society ever came into account when I chose clothing ! Besides, most of the time I only dressed in uniform ! This is something I’ll have to ask Kowa about. It is not the most egregious thing to happen, but it’s yet another step in leaving who I actually am behind. And I’m not keen on that.

Thankfully, Kowa told me that we could meet back up at Ueno station late afternoon, so I can ask him about it. And he also added me on Line, so, in case of emergency I can call him.

But now, class is the priority.

I look around in the train station, unsure of where I’m supposed to go. Although Kowa gave me a place and an hour to meet at, he wasn’t clear on how we would do that. But I’ll be honest, after all the dancing yesterday, we were both quite hammered. Though it really doesn’t help my case, as I was self-conscious the whole day, so I was unable to properly concentrate. Hopefully, he will find a way to help me, it’s barely my second day in the most prestigious academy of arts in the country, and I’m already encountering so many problems !

Suddenly, I receive a notification on my phone. Oh, it’s from Line ! Apparently, I was invited to the group 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento) by Kowa… and on there, someone named お鼠様 (Sir Rat) gave instructions, likely addressed to me.

He said :

“上野駅の下にですよ！参加してぞ！(I’m at the bottom of Ueno Station ! Join me !)”

His profile picture is cute, actually, being that of a rat with a cool hairstyle… quite reminiscent of that of the Bosozoku I now hang out with, actually – which should not really come as a surprise, thinking about it.

Back to the point, what did he mean by “at the bottom of Ueno station” ? It’s quite big, and there’s no real “bottom” point…

As I think about it for a while, wandering aimlessly in the meantime, my head starts to ache, and more than ever I crave for something in my mouth… I don’t know what, but something needs to go in. Thankfully, I thought to bring some spare lollipops, but they seem both too big and too small, they only bring temporary relief. That may also be something to talk about to them.

But bottom of the station… bottom of the station… Ha ! Yes, of course, the Metro ! That’s the part of the station that’s the deepest inside the earth !

I rush to there, hoping that Kowa – or more likely whoever that お鼠様 (Sir Rat) is – has not yet left. As I ride down the escalator, I keep my head out for anybody with the Bosozoku style. I wander a bit, not seeing anybody fitting the criteria, when suddenly I notice a service door that wasn’t fully closed.

Now, understand me. Service doors, as the name suggests, are for service employees only. Customers aren’t supposed to go in.

But the setup of this whole thing, and the mere thrill of doing something forbidden proved too enticing, as I find myself striding towards it, and entering. And my braveness… or rather foolishness if my opinion is the matter, is rewarded, as I find a Bosozoku with a big pompadour dyed blonde – though it appears ginger in the dark – standing there, with sunglasses and the attitude of a certified bad boy.

“Hey, so you made it, kouhai ! I was sure you would understand my hints ! You struck me as the smart kind – for better or for worse.” The guy hailed me very enthusiastically, almost making a motion of hugging towards me. - Uh… O-Nezu-sama, I presume ? - Heh, that’s correct ! Though you’d better know me as Soiri Tsutomu, that’s more worldly !” He corrects me, smiling seemingly both of amusement and compassion. - Oh, I-I’m sorry, Soiri…” I keep my head down in a show of humility. I may be breaking the law by being here, but I’m not breaking etiquette at the same time. - Don’t worry, don’t worry ! So, what brings you here ?”

I don’t quite know what to answer to this blunt a question. I expected him to rope me into something else like Kowa did, so while I thought of topics to bring up, I never thought of questions to ask… But as I look down at my clothes which bothered me the whole day, I get an idea. However, I barely open my mouth when Soiri interrupts me :

“Oh, yeah, I agree. That’s absolutely terrible fashion sense that you have here ! We’re gonna have to fix that pronto ! But you’re in luck !” Soiri makes a double biceps pose, pointing with his thumbs to his grubs. “I happen to be the best in fashion inside the 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento), so you’re in good hands !”

I squint, not understanding how he knew what I was thinking about. Seeing me stunned like that, he opens his mouth ready to speak once again, but this time I do manage to outpace him.

“Well, if you say so, then let’s go !” Better to leave this room earlier than later. It might be thrilling to live in danger, I don’t want to push my luck. - Okay, then follow me !”

As he leaves the service area to go to the subway, I follow him. I do ask him multiple times where we’re going, but he stays silent, telling me that it’s a surprise. We take the Ginza line and step down at Suehirocho station. We walk through a few narrow alleyways until we reach a small shop named Nichiwa.

Smiling, he invites me in, and when I enter, I’m immediately amazed at what that store actually sells. It sells leather clothes. Of all kinds of styles. And I didn’t know how much I needed leather clothes until today.

We bought a lot of clothes there. He also lead me to a few other stores where we bought other actually trendy and cool clothes, that are much better than anything I had in my closet.

As we left our last store, full of clothes in multiple bags, I felt quite tired from all the shopping, but at the same time so excited for this. Never would I ever need to feel self-conscious about what I wear ! So I thanked him :

“Thank you so much, Soiri. I don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t here to help me ! - Don’t worry, I love helping people finding clothes ! I might be at the Tokyo Arts School for music, I could absolutely see myself doing fashion in another universe. - So you do actually study at the Tokyo Arts School ? I thought that you were just hanging out as rascals somewhere you were not supposed to !” I ask, in disbelief, causing him to laugh. - Of course I do ! We all do study here, in the 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento) ! Well, Hitoshi doesn’t anymore, but it’s only because he graduated last year. - Oh, wow… I would have never thought, looking at how you dressed…” I actually feel quite guilty for stereotyping them like that. Turns out they do belong in the Arts School, I was the one in the wrong. Thinking about it, how many other people did I label as rascals only by looking at their style ? “But you used the name 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento), that’s also what the Line group I was invited to is named. Is that actually the name of your group, or is it just a funny thing for the Line group ? - Yup, that’s our name ! Subject to change, of course, like everything, but we really like it. Besides, we’re all really happy to bring you inside the group, so you’ll get a say in changing the name if you want !”

I stop at that.

Did he say that he wants to bring me inside their group ? That’s not what I want, what I want is to find a solution for the weird behaviors I have ! I don’t want to have anything more to do with them than I already have ! Besides, it’s their fault if all of that happens to me. Did they plan on that ? Were they just searching for anyone to add in their group of rascals, and chose to change me so that I fit their wishes ?

“I have no intention of joining your group ! 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento) or not, I’m only doing this because you did something weird to me ! Are you actually doing some kind of advanced kidnapping or what ?” I snap.

His turn to look stunned. It seems like he realized he said something wrong and is scrambling to find a way to scavenge it back. Well, let him stew. They brought it onto themselves by toying with me.

“Uh… well…” Mumbles Soiri, before he manages something a bit clearer. “Y-you know, you shouldn’t be saying that to the one who basically bought all of your clothes ! Let me say that it’s not cheap ! - You have no right to say that !” I pounce back. “You’re the one who’s molding me into what you want, of course you’re not buying me clothes out of the kindness of your heart ! You’re doing that to further your nefarious plan !”

He looks away, likely in shame. Or at least I hope so.

“So now, I go back home, and you find a way to reverse that. The clothes you bought are my insurance.” I layer on the guilt.

And on that, I leave for the subway station, but before I’m too far from him, he shouts to me :

“I can’t ! ... Message us when you need to.”

A few days passed, and I haven’t contacted them since. I’m still in their Line group, but I muted them. I only want the hotline just in case something truly beyond my control happens. And to be honest, I’ve had multiple times the urge to call them. I’m growing more and more restless every day, I’m finding myself more and more confused with foreign urges I cannot satisfy, and I’m becoming more and more estranged from myself. By now, I only dress with the clothes Soiri bought me, and the only music I listen to is that of the group I danced to with Kowa.

And so I stand there, in my 7J flat, chewing on the remains of my last lollipop, the corpses of eight more lying on the table, ready to burst at any moment. Nothing feels right, and even the thing I used to do feel wrong, now.

I look at my phone. Must I do it ? … No… I can still resist, prevent them from molding me anymore than they already did… But is it wise ? Look at me, I’m way past my limit, anymore and I may very well land in a mental hospital… Like it or not, everything the 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento) gave me made my plight easier to bear…

I sigh.

I’ll regret it, I’m sure. But I can’t. Not anymore. I made a valiant try, but this is beyond my powers. In the end, I’m still a normal boy, adult since only a few months ago, barely out of public education. I am not equipped to bear this kind of pain.

“おはよう皆…参加しようか？(Hey everyone… Can we meet up ?” I send, defeated, on the 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento) chat. - おはよう後輩！もちろんです！龍之介と俺はザ・デック・コーヒーエンドパイに遊ぶ。会合しようぞ！(Hey, kouhai ! Of course ! Ryuunosuke and I are hanging out at The Deck Coffee & Pie. Let’s meet up !)” Answered Soiri, faster than I expected. Was he monitoring his phone or what ? - 渋谷区にだぞ。明治神宮前駅と北参道駅の間に。(It’s in Shibuya district. Between Meiji-jingumae station and Kita-sando station.)” Added Kowa, as he is likely scolding Soiri for not giving me the cafe’s location. - 今来るぞ。(I’m coming.)” I answer succinctly.

Thankfully, Meiji-jingumae station is on the same line as the one I take to go to class, so I quickly hop on the first subway, and make my way to Shibuya. Although, all in all, I do stand defeated, I make my way to Deck Coffee & Pie with determination. I need to find an actual solution… even if it means being roped in to their group. They don’t even seem that bad anymore, that’s to say…

I enter the small cafe, looking around to find Kowa and Soiri. As I go from table to table, having explained to the cashier that I’m joining up with “friends”, I finally notice Kowa seating alone at a table.

“Hey, kouhai ! How are you ?” He hails me.

He looks quite different, actually, when he doesn’t wear a mask ! Plus, his hair is quite immaculate today… did he go to the barber’s ?

“Not that great, I’m… actually surrendering. You can do anything you want with me, I just want my suffering to stop.” I answer truthfully, disregarding whatever actual answer that question should have brought. - You’re over-estimating our amount of agency, you know !” He smiles with compassion, visibly understanding my plight. “We can’t ‘mold’ you like you claim we do, we can only introduce to things you’ll like, you know… - Don’t be kidding me, you’re doing something to me, there���s no other way…”

He sighs, and then takes out of his bag a red cigarette. It looks like the one I’ve seen back when at the Entrance Ceremony, but it’s not a kind I’ve ever seen otherwise. Weirdly, it feels somewhat inviting...

“Now, I don’t smoke. And neither does Tsutomu. Hitoshi does, and he has developed a special brand that, when inhaled, changes someone.” He reveals, while I look at him, horrified. “I don’t know where or how he made them, but he made three of them : I carry one, he carries one, and the third one was used on you. Tsutomu doesn’t get any, because even he knows he will waste it.”

It’s… a lot to digest. So it was an actual intentional ploy to transform me… thanks to what likely is a dangerous drug…

“I didn’t want to use it. But you were annoying, and Hitoshi wanted to test it on you because of that. - It wasn’t a reason ! Yes, I may have been nosy, but it’s not because I’ve done a bad thing that I deserve to be changed to my very core !” I protest, though I now understand that nothing can be done to amend this decision. - And it’s not because a lot of young criminals dress like we do that we need to be driven out.”

I shut up at him exposing my hypocrisy like this. By now, I really regret what I have done… I guess what is happening to me must be retribution for the numerous people I likely wronged by not trying to understand their character.

Suddenly, I hear the voice of Soiri ring from the other side of the room.

“You’re here !”

I looked in the direction of his voice, and noticed him making a weird pose before making his way to us. I cannot help but smile at him doing silly stuff like that, it’s really refreshing seeing someone living his life in full, while on the other hand I lived mine always shying away from having genuine fun.

“You found us, kouhai ! Or I guess I should call you bro, now, huh ?” He takes place next to Kowa, in front of his drink. “You should really use my first name rather than family name. We’re all familiar, here ! - You may also use mine.” Adds Kowa… well, I guess, Ryuunosuke, now. - Uh… hello… Tsutomu.” I meekly answer. - So, whatcha talkin’ about ?” Tsutomu asks. - I decided to reveal to him the truth about the red cigarette. - Oh, so heavy stuff ! I guess you’re ready to fully transition to your new self, huh ?”

I look away, still uneasy about the whole debacle. Ryuunosuke visibly notices that, as he gives the stink eye to Tsutomu, before continuing to explain the situation to me.

“Hitoshi told us that using the cigarette would cause someone to be more like us, and it seems that it was correct, as you liked our music and you’re wearing the clothes Tsutomu bought you. But I don’t know how much more we need to give you before you can be fully alright with your new situation. - There’s really no way to fix that ? To go back to who I really am ?” I ask, little hope remaining. - Not to my knowledge. If you should ask anyone that question, it would be Hitoshi, but he will be opposed to turning you back.”

I sigh.

“So, if you want to know what are my problems right now, well… every morning I find myself looking for some kind of product to put into my hair, but I don’t have any… Is that part of the deal ? - The pomp is included ?” Laughed Tsutomu, before being scolded by Ryuunosuke’s angry look. “Nah, seriously, it’s not hard once you get the hang of it. Like, bro, I could show you right now in this bathroom ! - I…” I start answering, before I’m suddenly cut off. - He needs a haircut.” Interjects Ryuunosuke. “You may try, but I guarantee it will look like your biggest disaster. - Oh yeah, you’re right.”

As they discuss the logistics of hair-cutting, I take out yet another lollipop and put it into my mouth. Although it’s not perfect, it does make me feel more at ease. That red cigarette was weird, it looked bizarrely short, yet also inviting. Is that what I crave to go in my mouth ? No, it cannot be, Ryuunosuke clearly said that both he and Tsutomu don’t smoke, and that the effects make me more like them. Plus, smoking is very bad for the lungs, I don’t want any of that poison in my lungs…

“So we’re goin’, then ?” Suddenly said Tsutomu quite loudly, driving me out of my thoughts. - Uh… yeah ? Yeah, I guess.” I answer, unsure of what I’m agreeing to. Though I guess it’s the famed haircut that is being referred to. - Then let’s gooooo !” He celebrated, once again with much more enthusiasm than needed.

Smiling from his contagious glee, I follow both of the 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento) guys into a nearby barbershop. They’re visibly regulars in this place, as they present me to the owner who takes me in charge. I’m lead to a seat, where the owner promptly takes care of my hair. He cuts it mostly on the side, though not by much. It seems to mostly be adjustments, more than a complete change of style.

“So, you got roped into going リーゼント (rīzento). How did they do it ?” The barber suddenly asks. - Uh... well can’t I chose to try new things ?” I ask aggressively, not wanting to answer truthfully to his question. - Heh, I’m sorry ! It’s only because you don’t seem to be the kind of guys who would be into that. You may be dressed in leather, but it shows in your face that you’re not the kind of people who would usually do that.”

Quite a shrewd guy, to notice that. And I don’t even think Tsutomu and Ryuunosuke have explained to him the situation, so to deduce that merely from my face is quite impressive.

“Well, the truth is I unexpectedly made friends with them, and their hair made me a bit envious.” I half-lie. I guess I can call them friends, by now. - We agree, a well-maintained pomp is quite impressive ! Though I already tell you, I won’t be able to make one as impressive as theirs with your amount of hair. I’ll actually make one of a different type, an Elephant’s Trunk, if it doesn’t bother you. - Oh, okay. Well, I’m here to learn, so I won’t be picky. - Glad to be in agreement.” He says deferentially, before going on another subject. “But yeah, these two, Kowa and Soiri, they’re really good guys, if you go beyond their edginess. I can understand how you accidentally made friends with them. - Yeah, Ryuunosuke is very considerate, while Tsutomu is always in a good mood. They’re both refreshing in their own way.” I agree with him. - Already on first name basis ! Though they’re quick to ask to use their first name, I only continue using their surname because they’re my clients. - Yes, I guess that makes sense.”

Our discussion continues a while, as the barber starts applying products in my hair. He then combs it in the back in a ducktail, before combing the top into curls that rise to the center, combining in the front to a tube-like shape that is so reminiscent of anime it makes me smile. He then sprays more product, fixes a few details, and tells me a bit how to reproduce this style. He talks about using grease to comb and hairspray to keep it in place, as well as techniques to get the pompadour looking correct.

After a while of discussing, and me buying the necessary products, I go out of the shop with my great hairstyle, and see Ryuunosuke and Tsutomu waiting for me.

“It looks sooo great, kouhai ! I’m glad I took you here !” Exclaims Tsutomu, approaching me in a very familiar fashion. - It suits you a lot.” Agrees Ryuunosuke, nodding at the same time. - If you want any tip, don’t hesitate to ask us ! Once, I had this style, so I know exactly how to make it !”

And there goes Tsutomu rambling about all the hairstyles he’s tried in all his experimenting, and all the styles he may also try out one day. But I fully agree, it really feels like a piece of the puzzle has just been found. It immediately puts me more at ease, and although I know I’m not there yet, I know that now I can breathe.

“You know what ?” Suddenly asks Tsutomu. “You guys have class tomorrow ? - Only the afternoon.” States Ryuunosuke. - Uh… I…” I check my phone to see my agenda, and find it empty for tomorrow. “I don’t, surprisingly. - Well, why not go sleep over at my place ?”

I look at him surprised, not having anticipated this turn of events. It would be great, but… I don’t have any of my things, nor do I have anything to wear, I don’t know whether I need to check stuff at my flat, and…

Fuck ! This makes me stress so much ! I need something in my mouth ! I take out a lollipop in front of the guys, who look at me weirdly. What, haven’t they seen anyone liking sweets ? But yeah, actually, why not. I should take a cue out of Tsutomu and let go. If it’s fun, I should do it. Yeah, that seems way better.

“Seems good.” I answer. - Then we’re all set ! Let’s gooooo !” Celebrated Tsutomu.

It seems Ryuunosuke answered while I was considering. I hope I wasn’t too weird… NO ! Not weird, let’s ban this word from my dictionary !

Tsutomu leads us through streets and subway lines into a small flat, bigger than mine but not by much. However, just looking inside gives a good idea of who he is, as there are loads of colorful posters on the wall, an electric guitar – or bass, I don’t know the difference – and otherwise a lot of untidied clutter. Once inside, we hang out, have long conversations in which I participate eagerly, we dine – if instant ramen can be called a dinner – and all together have good fun.

When night falls, we get the futons out and place them aligned in the center of the tatami floor, with me in the middle – cozy ! Ryuunosuke and Tsutomu both take some kind of cap that looks like a plastic bag that they put around their hair. They urge me to do the same, but I refuse. I don’t want to sleep with a hat on. However, I do undress into my underwear, surprising both of them by my boldness -hey, that’s how I sleep ! – before I enter my futon to sleep.

When I wake up, I notice that the futon to my right is empty. After stretching a bit, I rise up and look around. On the futon to my left, Tsutomu is still sleeping quite deeply, or at least I assume so looking at his weird position. The blinds are half-opened, and looking behind me, I see Ryuunosuke taking his breakfast on the short table.

I go to stand up and sit in front of him. Weirdly enough, there seem to be a white box right next to his miso soup, I wonder what it is about… But as he finishes eating his bread, he hails me, taking on a quiet voice :

“Hey, kouhai. Slept well ? - Yeah, a lot easier than the last few days.” I answer, making him smile. - I’m glad you decided to come back. Even back when we went to see Kishidan I felt you were quite a good guy. - Thank you. I must admit I had my reservations, but you were so nice I couldn’t stay angry for long. Even if I like you better due to that weird cigarette thing. - Yeah.” He grimaces a bit. “I hope at least that you learned to be more considerate with this whole debacle. - I can’t say if I learned it, but… I’m really sorry about what I did to you three back then. No matter how I put it, I was in the wrong, and made you feel unwelcome somewhere you had all rights to be.”

He smiles and puts his hand on my shoulder.

“I forgive you. I know you weren’t doing it out of malice, but since you now apologized, I have no reason to hold any grudge. - Thank you very much…”

His smile is so tender, I can’t help but reciprocate it. He may feel quite formal, and not show a lot of emotion apart from the occasional sarcasm, I can feel that he is true to himself. His humility isn’t for show, it’s something I believe he truly is. That’s a quality I hope to possess one day, even if it’s only to stay true to myself and not mire myself in politeness.

“By the way, Hitoshi came here, earlier. I told him that we were staying at Tsutomu’s because he had something he had to drop off to you, but he had to work so he couldn’t stay.”

He gave me the small white box, which opened into a pack of cigarettes. Why did he give that to me ? I… I don’t smoke ! I don’t want to ! It’s useless to me !

“I know you’re not very fussed about getting that. Trust me, I was also skeptical. But don’t you have a craving for something to go in your mouth, sometimes ? - Uh… n-no ! Of course, not !” I lie, because of course it wouldn’t be cigarettes I’m craving for… right ? - You know, I saw you take out a lollipop. You also have a few in your pocket. You can’t lie to me.”

Seeing his uncompromising glare, I sighed. I don’t like to admit it, but he might be correct. Cigarettes might be what I’ve actually been craving for… unfortunately.

“Yeah. Since the beginning. I need something in my mouth. - Well, Hitoshi told me that the fact your change started with the smoke, it made you crave the smell, and that the fact that the contents of the change are based on Hitoshi, who’s quite the smoker, it means that you’re now very likely a smoker.”

I consider the cigarettes, not knowing whether it’s a trick or the actual last piece of the puzzle. I do know that it’s hard to ever come back from smoking, so even if it was a wrong guess, I’d now have a smoking problem. But on the other hand, I do crave for something in my mouth, and nothing has ever seemed as convincing as this… Ryuunosuke opens to me the door to the balcony, and hands me a lighter. I guess he is convinced… I mean, why would he not, the creator of the drug that made me change told him that smoking would be the missing piece ! But I still stand somewhat unconvinced…

… Eh, what did I say before ? That I shouldn’t overthink, and should do things I want to do.

So I take him in his invitation and go to the balcony, putting one of the cigarettes in my mouth. Oh god, it already feels good ! It’s the right size, the right texture, the right resistance… I didn’t want any of those crappy lollipops, I really wanted a cigarette !

Then, I light it up, and take my first drag…

And it’s heavenly ! I’m for the first time since the beginning of my misadventures feeling alright ! Not nervous, not anxious, just fine !

I take other drags, and this feeling of intense pleasure continues. Yes, I confirm, smoking was the missing piece. And it feels so good. This wonderful sensation of everything falling into place into a complete apotheosisis absolutely worth all the dangers and problems it comes with.

Suddenly, there’s some noise inside. I’d look inside, but I don’t want to trouble Tsutomu by stinking his house with smoke odor – even though it smells so good now, I still remember a time when I’d shy away from it.

“Oh, Hitoshi’s here ?” Asks Tsutomu’s groggy voice. “I’d recognize this smell anytime… - No, he came in earlier but he’s not the one smoking.” Answered calmly Ryuunosuke. - Huh ? Eh…” I hear some loud steps, likely Tsutomu trying to find the source of the smell. “Oh, kouhai, what are you doing here ? You’re already up ? - Yup.” I answer casually. “By the way, thanks for all your help, Tsutomu. And sorry for the first time we met. - Well, you’re welcome ! I’m glad we got to meet !” I hear him come closer. “Wait… the smell… is it coming from you !?” He notices, very surprised. - Yeah. I needed a smoke.”

He shuffles his way to the balcony, so I can see his very confused face. It’s fun to see him look like that.

“Wait, since when do you smoke ? - Since right now. - Uh… okay… and where are the cigarettes from ? - From… er, sorry, I don’t know his surname. From Hitoshi. - Oh, it explains all.”

It’s funny to hear him being shut up like that, he usually doesn’t ever stop talking ! But it might be the fact that it’s early morning, I myself am still quite drowsy. I finish peacefully my smoke while I hear Tsutomu preparing his breakfast in the back. He also asks what I like to eat, and I tell him I prefer rice.

Once everything is cooked up, and my cigarette was extinguished, I took place at the table, and conversations once again spring up. This time, I feel so much more at ease, I think I finally found what clicked for me. I look at them both. I’m glad to have found them, even if it meant losing myself in the process, because I’m sure the new me is infinitely better than the old.

“Thank you both for being here for me.” I suddenly thank them. “It… really meant a lot, even if I was confrontational back then.”

They smile at me.

“Don’t worry about it ! We’re bros, now !” Answers Tsutomu. - Yes, and friends are for life.” Acquiesces Ryuunosuke.

One day, you may be wandering the streets of Tokyo, and find people dressed in a 70 year-old style coming from the United States. That day, you may be meeting the 令和リーゼント (Reiwa rīzento), a small group of four artistic people who like to draw, paint, sing and play. Even though I would have never had imagined even holding a conversation with them, circumstances made me join them, and I couldn’t be happier. Life is too bleak when you can’t share it with friends.

And if you ever find yourself lonely in that part of town…

… just know that two red cigarettes still stand unused.

================================================

If I had one nickle for each time I write a story set in Japan and it devolves into a 6000+ words odyssey that involves tons of research, I’d have two nickles, which is not a lot, but it’s weird that it happened twice.

Just so you know : the Bōsōzoku (暴走族) were youth biker gangs from the 80s who were known for public disorder and otherwise gang violence, and took inspiration from American greasers for their style. Today, there’s not a lot of them left and they aren’t seen as a danger anymore, but their style was captured in pop culture, and is one of the go-to style for youth delinquents in anime (cf. Yusuke Urameshi and Kazuma Kuwabara in Yū Yū Hakusho and the whole of Jojo’s Adventure’s cast, really). This style has also found its way in Chinese pop culture, though the original reference is fully lost over there.

Hope you found this interesting ! ^^

[anime-simp-0]

when bakugo’s anti-villain s/o and him fight

i got this idea from the opposite version of this i did, bakugo’s anti-hero s/o. it really had me thinking how bakugo would react to someone who fits the anti-villain archtype; someone who has the noble goals but their means of attainment are evil.

well for starters, just like heroes have a ton of different sub-archtypes, so do anti-villains. in the most basic sense, i’m basing mine off of the concept that they have the right end-goal but not the right methods they are going about so i guess you could kinda consider them like mr. ferret boy draco malfoy. he, by nature, is evil. he has toxic traits and is overall a less then decent individual. however, if tiktok has shown anything, it is that people can still obsess over him. (sighs in dracotok)

regardless, in terms of bakubitch’s s/o, i dont think this makes them a bad person. just misguided. stain’s ideology was exposed to them at a vulnerable time and it just stuck and they turned in to a vigilante because no one had validly proven to them a better option. which led to constantly fooling around in the shadows and kicking ass but mainly for the purpose of catching twofaced hero’s that are actually really shady people, so all around a moral goal but not heroic action.

as to how bakugo would react to this, I think that it really depends on what stage Bakugo you are dating. Middle School? High school? Starting Hero? Experienced? And a large part of this differentiation is what he experienced at UA.

In middle school, he thought heroes were the good guys and they always did the right thing and he was going to be the #1. He was gonna be so perfect that they had no choice except to give him the title of perfection.

And then, UA happened. And he experienced the USJ and he saw firsthand what villains are like. Low level thugs, sure. But those villains didn't care if they killed everyone in that building. And then to see a monster so strong it could get hit by All Might at full force and not bat an eye. That's not even mentioning what happened at the summer camp. Not only was he kidnapped but had his life continuously toyed with for hours and the heroes took their sweet ass time to save him. All because they wanted to follow protocol, and he still managed to get away in the end. I don't think the protocol issues get any better with time either.

I think the older he gets, the more they piss him off. Because he's seen more. he's seen the damage wasting time can do. and i guarantee you there was a decision he makes in the future that costs someone their life because he decided to follow protocol and he never lets himself forget it. because that blood isn't on the commission's hands. it's on his. he was the one that made the call to listen to what the high and might's decided.

The experience also changes his definition of right and wrong. He starts to see everything through a different lens when it comes to why villains do what they do. Are they stealing from places because it's fun or the way they survive? Are they selling drugs because it's their hustle or because it's the only way they can provide. He also starts to see heroes in a different light as well. Are they saving people because they want to keep the city safe or because of publicity? Do they actually care about protecting individuals or is it about the money? And then you have the antivillains and antiheroes and all he can think is about the person who lost their life because he decided to follow the rules. But antiheroes and antivillains and vigilantes don't care about that kinda stuff. They don't have to follow the rules that they didn't sign up for. They don't have to go through the chain of command or rules and regulations. They have the freedom to do the right thing with no consequences ( unless they get caught that is ).

Truly though, I don't think you were aware Bakugo was a hero when you first started dating him, just like I don't think he was aware that you were a antivillain/vigilante. but i could totally see you both finding out because you were running from heroes after some shit and he managed to catch you and you both had a moment where you recognized each other and he couldn’t let you get caught so he let you go and stalled to buy you time. which, yea, lead to a pretty interesting fight. but you managed to talk and make it work. he made you promise to stop fucking around as long as he followed up on his end about taking care of the shitty heroes so you didn’t have to. having said that, i think that he also is still very strong in his beliefs that heroes are good. sure not all of them, but enough where being completely against heroes annoys the living shit out of him. so i think that many arguments would stem from you not liking some of the heroes he works with. whether that’s you doing the signature smart ass lines that make them uncomfortable or intentionally making it known you don’t like them.

hence why it was currently 1:32 in the morning and instead of being in bed with the hot headed prick you call your boyfriend, you were on the couch.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

the heated words from earlier still ring in your ears as you lay on the couch, looking out of the window and onto the city that lay below, glistening and active even at this time of night. a thin blanket was wrapped around your legs as bakugos shirt that was a few sizes too big left your legs exposed to the cold air in his apartment. you would have left after everything that was said but he had picked you up from your apartment and brought you to his earlier that day so now you were stranded and far too stubborn to ask for help from your friends, knowing they would want details you weren’t comfortable disclosing yet. instead, you decided to sleep on the couch and calm yourself by staring into the glass pane.

the details of your fight were still cloudy in your mind, but one thing was for sure. you both were not on good terms. after you made a backhanded joke about one of the heroes he had become friendly with, it was all over. it started with just about the one guy, then it became how you never liked anyone from his job, then it turned into you hating everything heroes and then, finally, bakugo said the thing that really set you off. “if you hate heroes so much, then do you even give a shit about me? if all heroes are so damn bad!” the things that came out of your mouth next were a mix of rapid fire insults and gabs at him, turning into a full out war of verbal assaults over something as simple as you not likely one of his work buddies.

it made you so angry, it almost made you cry. not because you cared. what? no! of course not! i mean, why would you, right? it’s not like the most important person in your life insulted you and one of the only things you truly believe in before having the audacity to ask if you even loved him-… oh wait… no. no, yea that is what made you cry. you sighed and rubbed your eyes, wiping away the tears before they had a chance to fall. you were angry at yourself. if only you hadn’t said anything. if only you didn’t snap back at him. if only you never said you didn’t like his new work partner. if only-

the sound of the bedroom door opening cause your attention before a bakugo, and frankly a quite grumpy and agitated bakugo at that, stepped out. but the sour expression faded off his face when he saw the tear that you hadn’t managed to wipe away.

“what do you want” you muttered before turning back towards the window and, as subtly as you could, wiping away the dampness from your cheek.

he went to speak multiple times before pausing with a slight growl and shuffling towards you. his sweats hung low on his waist and his hands were bunched up in his pockets as he flexed them, standing next to you on the couch.

“look…” he sighed. this kinda thing was never easy for him. he spent so much time condensing his feelings, being able to openly talk about them was weird on so many level that even after a year and a half of you two dating it still made him feel weird. “i.. shouldn’t have used your stuff against you… what you believe and support is what you do and… i can’t control that or change it. it’s just… i was pissed and wasn’t thinking straight… and i know that’s not a good enough reason to hurt you, i’m not saying it is i just…” he sighed again before taking a hand out from his pocket and rubbing his face “i know you love me, okay? i know that. you prove it everyday you deal with my hero shit or help with my cuts and scraps after a bad day or even just, fuck, staying. you didn’t leave. and i love you for that, okay? i do. i fucking love you with everything i have.”

your tempted to turn to look at him, to break and let a tear fall while you sit there but you don’t. he groans softly before taking his hand and lightly pressing his fingertips to your chin and turning your face towards him. “i’m sorry baby… i mean it. im sorry” he leans down and softly kisses your head before pulling away.

“don’t fucking do it again” is all you can manage before resting your head against him as his arms wrap around you.

“trust me, i don’t plan on it”

“i mean it katsuki” your voice was cold and sent a chill straight to his spine. “don’t question my love again. and don’t use my opinions against me. i love you enough to be with you even though you’re a hero but i love myself enough to walk away if I need to.” you paused and look up at him “don’t put me in a position where i have to be the bad guy. we both know i play the part too well.”

he nodded solemnly before taking a deep breathe. out of everything you had said to him in the last couple hours, that he knew was true. you were always labeled as a villain. not only by your peers but you family as well. when you manifested your quirk and it was far more powerful then anyone else in your family trees, they immediately wanted you to be a hero. to make money for them and be popular. and the second you said no, they turned on you so fast it gave you whiplash. you were so used to being put in positions where you had no choice but to be the bad guy. to do the non glamorous or even cruel thing to survive. he had become your safe space, but even he wasn’t foolish enough to believe you couldn’t live without him. hell, it was the other way around.

he had been laying in bed since you had had your fight, tossing and turning in the cold sheets and reaching for a body that wasn’t there, searching for warmth that was on a couch instead of wrapped in silk with him. he had tried to fight himself on it for hours now. but as much pride as he had, his ego crumbles before you. you mattered more than that to him. you mattered more then being right or proving a point. he needed you. you had become such an important part of him that the idea of you being gone made his heart stop. he was nauseous at the thought of opening the bedroom door and finding your things missing and shoes no longer by the door.

but right now with you in his arms, all he wanted to do was hold you. not for another minute or another hour. forever. he never wanted to breathe without you in his arms. he didn’t want to know what it felt like for you to exist without him. so he looked down at you slowly, his thumb rubbing back and forth against your skin as he held you against him. “I know…” he rested his head against yours, “i know.”

[stealingyourbones]

There are plenty of fics where Jason ends up with a de-aged Danny, but what if Dick found him?

The GIW has long since run out of funding but the former agents still hold onto their ghost hunting ways in an almost crazed obsession. Most of the agents who worked for the GIW until the end have lost everything and are now more or less a gang of thugs everyone thinks are absolutely full of it. For some unknown reason the portal in Amity Park was shut down (Danny found out Gotham had a whole selection of scholarships that didn't rely on good grades or perfect attendance so he moved for school, closing the portal for the foreseeable future) Things happen, Danny is captured by the GIW thugs,  based out of Gotham now, and goes into his core needing to recover, but unfortunately for halfas this reverts them to a younger age if they are pulled out of their core before they fully recover. The bats get word there's a new 'gang' that reserve absolutely no regard for life, having blown up multiple places in Gotham and straight up abducting dark haired, blue eyed kids in the middle of the day. Unfortunately for Danny, someone ends up accidentally giving him an abrupt wake up call, pulling him out of his core while the bats try to put an end to these ghost obsessed weirdos and his brain is basically scrambled eggs because it's now a stew of vague memories and emotions due to his incomplete recovery. Insert Dick being the one to find Danny cowering in the corner of one of the rooms, maybe not being able to even control his form, flickering between Phantom and Danny, in a hoodie like six sizes too big.

[justfranzz]

Gorgug Thistlespring was mad.

Well… mad was an understatement. He was furious, liquid fire shooting through his veins and filling him up, up, up, until he was sure he would spill over and slash and tear and claw the world apart.

But he couldn’t. Wouldn’t.

So he clenched his fists, and bit his tongue, and sang himself a little song. Because Gorgug Thistlespring was supposed to be kind, and gentle, and patient. His parents had told him that all his life, so he tried his best, he really did. But sometimes it was just… too much.

It scared him, sometimes, how angry he got.

When he was ten, before he had learned to turn the fire inside of him to steel, he beat a girl so badly she was hospitalized for a week. She had called him a mistake, a freak, had said his real parents didn’t love him, that they had abandoned him because he wasn't worth loving. It was stupid, but he was ten, and he didn’t know. He didn’t know.

His vision was red, and everything was on fire, and he was too hot, and the next thing he knew he was on the ground and she was under him, ribs fractured, arm broken in two places, blood gushing from her nose.

She looked terrified.

It scared Gorgug, how easy it had been, bones crunching under his touch and blood wetting his fists. He had barely even needed to try. He locked himself away in his room for a week afterwards, handcuffed his wrists together, threw up every time he remembered her bloody, terrified face.

His parents sang to him through the door, built silly little contraptions, tried to reassure him that it wasn’t his fault. He knew, though, of course he knew. The walls in his home were paper thin. He heard Wilma crying in their bedroom every night; Digby’s sad, quiet attempts at comfort.

When Gorgug finally came out of his self-imposed prison, he felt as though some part of himself were permanently altered. He knew, now, that he was a monster. That he was dangerous.

He asked his parents to teach him how to channel his anger. It helped. Not enough, but it helped. So he sang his little songs, and ran laps around the city until he couldn’t feel his legs, and pounded hot metal into the shape of birds and rabbits and flowers and pretended it was a body he was hitting instead.

Still, he was angry.

He could feel it, always lurking just under the surface, simmering. A part of him wanted to do it again, to feel the adrenaline and the heat and the power. That part terrified him.

It got worse with puberty. His shoulders broadened, his teeth grew longer and sharper, he had shot up to six foot four by the time he was thirteen. Now everyone else could tell, just by looking at him, what he already knew. He was dangerous. He was frightening. He could hurt people.

(He was afraid that they could see the part of him that wanted to.)

Gorgug slouched, and talked as softly as he could, and made flowers, and hoped that maybe if he sang enough songs, the fire would go away. It never did.

His first party formed in middle school. They were his first real friends - a pretty water genasi druid named Chrystal, a human bard named Gabe, and a goblin cleric named Fingus. They only went on one mission. The first time they saw Gorgug go into a rage - mouth open in a snarl, that familiar fire lighting up his veins, greataxe raised and ready - they ran. The thug they had been chasing ran, too, a full adult elf scared of a twelve year old boy.

He was just too dangerous, too scary, too monstrous to be around. Gorgug knew this, so he hid. He took the angry, violent part of himself and locked it up in a heavy metal safe and shoved it into the deepest, darkest corner of his mind where no one could find it. He sat in the farthest corner of the room in class, he didn't touch his ax unless he had to, he wore the baggiest clothes he could find to cover up his bulky form. Gorgug hid, and he pretended he wasn't everything that made up him.

When he met the Bad Kids, things changed.

The Bad Kids were different. They didn’t flinch when he went into a rage, they didn’t care how easy it was for him to slice a person in half; they thought his strength was impressive, not threatening. They touched him like they weren’t afraid, holding his hand and throwing themselves around his shoulders and wrapping their arms around his massive torso, like they didn’t know he could crush them with his bare hands. Like they wouldn't care even if he did.

More than that, the Bad Kids were angry, and they weren’t afraid of it.

Fig was rage incarnate; she was openly, loudly, defiantly furious, and it wasn’t scary at all, not to Gorgug. It was beautiful. She wore her anger like a shield, so different from the way he hid it away. She punched people she didn’t like, and hit people in the head with her bass guitar, and yelled and cursed and smoked. She was angry, and she wanted everyone to know it, and more than that she wanted everyone to feel it.

Fabian was pissed off more often than not. Eventually, Gorgug learned that the boy was angry at himself, the heavy pressure of his father's expectations weighing down on him. He wanted to instill fear, to leave his enemies cowering at his feet. Fabian reveled in fear; used it to his advantage.

Kristen was frustrated at her ex-god, her parents, the role models she had depended on all of her life. She felt betrayed, and broken, and lost, and she showed it like it didn't matter, like she didn't care if everyone saw. Like she wanted to send a message, to tell a story to everyone who would listen. Like she was proud of it.

Adaine's anger was quiet, most of the time, like a refrigerator humming in the background; always there, but so subtle you tuned it out after a while. But when she was faced with the cruelty of her sister or her parents, she became an explosion, loud and bitter and fiery. Adaine had to work for her anger, refusing to rationalize and excuse away the things that had been done to her. She viewed her anger as an achievement, a marker of how far she had come.

Riz's fury was often backed by fear, but it was no less powerful for it. Riz wanted nothing more than to solve mysteries and protect his friends, and anyone who got in the way of either of those things risked meeting with the business end of a loaded pistol. His anger was the fire in the chamber of a gun, giving power to his desires. It was a way of showing his love, of how much his party meant to him.

The Bad Kids were angry, but they were kind. They were angry, but still they extended compassion wherever they could, and Gorgug learned for the first time that being angry didn't mean he couldn't be gentle. The Bad Kids were furious, and they were considerate, and they were passionate, and they cared, and none of those things canceled out the others.

Gorgug learned that it was okay to use his anger as a weapon, to slash and hit and break, but he also learned that he could be gentle in a way that didn't feel insincere. He learned to rest his head on Fig's shoulder, just enough pressure to show affection but not enough to hurt her. He learned to hold Fabian's hand in his without worrying he'd crush it, and that it was okay to squeeze a little. He learned to carry Riz on his shoulders, and spin around as fast as he could, goblin arms tight around his thick neck for balance. He learned how to make tea from Adaine, large hands delicately holding a porcelain cup with practiced care. He learned to wrap his long arms around Kristen when she hugged him, and that being surrounded by him wasn't scary for her, but comforting.

The Bad Kids healed something in him he didn't know was there anymore, and as Gorgug slowly unlocked the box he had shoved in the corner of his mind, he found that perhaps his rage had not been as monstrous as it had at first appeared.

Maybe he was just a high school boy, and sometimes high school boys were angry, and that was okay. Maybe anger was a tool, and it was okay to use it as long as he was gentle, too.

Gorgug was angry, and with time, he learned to be proud of it.

[theqtinkblot]

Helluva Wonderland AU: Sinners

With the Overlords/Housewardens’ backstories finished, let’s see how the others got to Hell. This will only talk about their short time on Earth and what they did in Hell before joining the cult. Also their will be a tiny bit of info for future characters, which I hope you’ll like.

Again, some warnings (18+): mentions of drugs, mentions of guns, underage drinking, unhealthy relationships, demonic practice, implied suicide, angst, violence, death, etc.. You get it, onto the post!

Ace Trappola:

Ace was born on September 23, 1988, in Camden, London, with his mom, his dad and his older brother. He lived a very modest life, but the only bad stuff he’s done was ghosting his girlfriend in middle school, gambling in small pubs for quick cash, and stealing only necessary items. But still, he did manage to go to college in America at the age of 21, before dying in a hit and run on March 5, 2010.

The moment he woke up in Hell with back pain, he immediately saw the red sky and freaked out seeing the creepy monsters around him. He ran towards the nearest store he could find to ask where he was only to be greeted by his new demonic reflection. He looked pretty much the same as he did before, with the only difference being his new reddish skin tone, pointed ears, sharp teeth, and his left eye having a black sclera with a red iris in the shape of a heart.

Ace’s first day in hell was just spent playing card tricks for crowds, gambling for quick cash, and stealing food just to survive. Things get a little messy when he ends up in the Heartslabyul district, Ace has just finished playing some tricks when he spots some tarts left alone. Little did he know, those were for the Crimson Tyrant, who found him eating one of his tarts and was about to behead him. But Ace begged him to spare him, so Riddle made him sell his soul to serve him whenever he demands it, making it very clear Ace must follow the rules Riddle made.

Deuce Spade:

Deuce was born to a single mother on June 3, 1994, in a small city in England. Growing up, he was nothing more than a total punk, ditching school, hanging with thugs, smoking and drinking, getting into fights, all the works. But one day, coming home late at night at the age of 21, he hears his mom crying about how awful a mother she must’ve been. After running away in tears, Deuce vowed to become a better person, but he didn't get that far when he got shot in the head on May 27, 2016.

After waking up from a splitting headache, the man immediately freaked out after seeing a demon get run over by a car. Deuce backs up into a glass wall and spots his demonic reflection. Not much about his appearance changed like his bleached hair, but his skin was now a bluish skin tone, pointed ears, sharp teeth, and his right eye having a black sclera with a blue iris in the shape of a spade.

In Hell, Deuce tried to change himself for the better, doing some good deeds and changing his bleached hair blue, but many sinners just see him as a thug. When he experienced Hell’s annual purge, Deuce was trying to find a place to hide but saw Riddle trying to escape an exorcist. Deuce knocked the angel out from behind, allowing him and Riddle to run back to the Heartslabyul district. The Overlord, thankful for his help, offers Deuce sanctuary in his domain, in exchange for his service as his guard.

Ruggie Bucchi:

Ruggie was born on April 18, 1981 in a very poor part of New York city. His childhood wasn't the best, his mom dying when he was born and his dad just abandoning him, only to be raised by his grandma, so Ruggie did whatever it takes for them to survive. He kept up stealing and selling drugs to earn enough to support her until her passing, afterwards, he dies from a laughing gas leak on February 10, 2004, at the age of 22.

Ruggie violently woke up, coughing up a storm, only to find himself in somewhere that looked like a lion's den, before noticing a humanoid lion staring down at him. The lion man, or Leona, the King of the Hellbeasts, asked him, “How did you manage to trespass and enter my territory, hyena?” Ruggie didn’t understand what he meant until he discovered that he had indeed become an anthropomorphic spotted hyena demon.

With his laid-back, yet cunning personality, Ruggie became Leona’s right hand man, deceiving others to gain their secrets, stealing important and or valuable items, and currying out favors for Leona. Due to his versatility and street smarts from his poor upbringing, although very loyal to his Overlord master, he does find Leona's laziness or privileged behavior a bit annoying. But still, he doesn't go against Leona's orders and makes it his duty to make sure to remind Leona of his duties and that the Hellbeast sinners contribute to the Savanaclaw territory.

Jamil Viper:

Jamil was born on September 12, 1970, in the Middle East. For generations, his family has been servants for the Asim household, he was only born to serve, guard and be a companion to Kalim. But all his life, Jamil secretly hated being overshadowed by Kalim and giving up everything for him, which made him ultimately try to sabotage Kalim’s image while still acting as the servant the family expects of him. At the age of 22, Kalim got really into American pop culture, heard of a movie based on the 1001 Arabian Nights stories and wanted to go there, much to Jamil’s protests, only for him to be killed by a servant on November 25, 1992, from a venomous snake.

Jamil groaned in pain before realizing the venom suddenly subsiding, but when he tried to stand up, he felt his legs were unresponsive. Instead, he was shocked to find his legs had merged into a long snake tail and his hair now acted like a cobra’s hood. In the midst of his confusion, he notices someone fall next to him and sees a white otter with a water-like lava lamp chest wearing a turban, only to immediately groan, knowing exactly who he was.

Their first week of Hell was difficult as they tried to survive, but when Kalim got in contact with a group of demons who wanted to start a merchant business, Jamil was skeptical before they agreed to help. This led to business growing and many sinners willingly offered their services to Kalim, making him an Overlord, and Jamil low key hated it. Seeing that Kalim is succeeding and gaining power, just like he had before when they were alive, and even if Jamil is no longer bound to the rules and traditions his family was restricted to at birth, he’s still just second rate.

Sebek Zigvolt:

Sebek was born in Paris, France on March 17, 1993, living with his mom, dad, his siblings, and grandfather, who was actually a descendant from the Draconian cult. Sebek would spend time with his grandpa, learning about their family’s demonic bloodline, how he was part of the war between Heaven and Hell, and founder of their cult. With this knowledge of his heritage, Sebek proudly devoted his life to the Draconian cult, even slaughtering any traitors, until his “sacrifice” on May 28, 2014, at the age of 21.

The first thing Sebek noticed when he awoke was a humongous chandelier lit with green flames, along with two men with demon horns staring back at him. His eyes lit up when the much taller demon introduced themselves as Malleus and Lilia before Sebek straightened himself and bowed at their presence. Later on, he would examine himself, only to see that he looked very much like his pathetic human form, except for the pointy fangs and his eyes having a black scleras with yellow-green eyes and vertical-slit pupils.

Once he is properly a part of the cult and settled down in Malleus’s castle, Sebek asked Lilia to train him to become a knight for Malleus. Sebek then began his combat training and magic lessons along with Lilia’s adopted son, Silver, who although didn’t seem to be demonic in nature and in appearance, still considers him as an equal, even if they argue at times. However, due to his dedication to Malleus and the cult, he almost looks down at every sinner around him and rarely has any friends to talk to.

[tododeku-or-bust]

I'm not trying to make it about me, but I do wanna explain why I empathize, I suppose, to not wanting Palestinians to have to see that terrible picture like that or have to constantly share images of their suffering.

Bc I remember pretty much middle school to NOW, how every damn season was another dead or brutalized Black body. Another bullshit racist excuse, another act of violence towards us for being us, a bunch of people on the Internet arguing whether or not we even deserved to be seen as human and if our suffering mattered. The "oh it's not racism, it's [semantics bc the shit was always racist]. I remember my neighbor telling me "Mike Brown was a thug" while she treated me like an "exceptional negro". I remember seeing them pose Sandra Bland's dead body as a mugshot, a woman who was just like me. I remember my dad saying "this is why Black women need to shut their mouths" when Korryn Gaines was murdered. I remember the way there would be "outrage" and then the energy would die down until yet another dead Black body. Like a rerun of a TV show.

I couldn't take it anymore. I can't even look at those videos anymore. I stopped around 2017. It was a video of a latino man being strangled to death, while a group of that white man's family members blocked the recording. They were more worried about saving their white family's face than they were the man he was murdering for the audacity to piss on the ground. That's when I realized- do they really need to see this? Do they really need to see Black and Brown bodies so dehumanized to care? How many?? And they're blocking the camera- do these people even care??

It's something so... humiliating about seeing your suffering live action on the screen and people still finding a way to demean and deny the dangers of your life experience. You feel you lack humanity in their eyes; just another dead darkie. It hurts. So I can't imagine seeing whole ass MISSILES on screen, starving families, blood EVERYWHERE.... And still feeling like "wow I need this to remind me I care". You shouldn't have needed more than the one time, to be honest, and yet... It keeps happening. Y'all have to keep posting. It just... It bothers me for y'all so bad because I wouldnt want to, it's such an unnecessary challenge to y'all's humanity.

[rayshippouuchiha]

Katekyo Hitman Reborn AU Masterlist

Dr. Trent Acles - Skull might not have much in the way of formal education but come to find out it really doesn't matter. Oodako is there to pick up his slack and have his back. Unfortunately for Verde and Reborn, both of whom can't seem to figure out what the illustrious Dr. Trent Acles has against them personally.

Tsuna And Skull's Excellent Adventure - Tired of the chaos and general lack of boundaries and respect that they've both endured over the years, Tsuna and Skull impulsively decide to set out on a bit of a road trip. Together. Without really telling anyone beforehand. This is widely considered to be a mistake by most everyone they leave behind.

Red Sky - After a painful encounter with a group of Yakuza thugs, the Seal that's been holding back young Tsuna's Sky Flames shatters. Tsuna is left with the realization that all of his problems, all of the things that make him Dame-Tsuna, were never his fault. Now, armed with a Hyper Intuition that's practically alive, and a rage wild enough to eat stars, Tsuna decides that he has one solid goal for his future. Kill Iemitsu. ~ Now Live On AO3

Tsunarara - Depressed and convinced he really is as much of a loser as everyone always says he is, Tsuna decides that his best hope for a good future is to study the Art of the Housewife from the resident Yamato Nadeshiko. Needless to say this means Reborn's going to be meeting a very different Vongola heir in the future.

Lonely As A Cloud - Clouds are not only a rare Flame but they're far more important than most people seem to realize. A Cloud is meant to help shoulder some of the burden of the Sky after all. A fact that the Arcobaleno, who have abused and misused and pushed their Cloud away for decades now, are about to learn the hard way. Especially when Xanxus and the Varia come calling, hoping to take a wayward Cloud as their own

Hello Tomorrow - ~Assassination Classroom Crossover ~ When Hibari has a run-in with what he thinks is a young girl who managed to slip right underneath his guard, he obviously takes the little animal home and presents her to his husband Tsuna. Except that "little girl" is actually a young Nagisa Shiota. Needless to say, Hibari and Tsuna now have a new son.

Full Metal Sky - ~Fullmetal Alchemist Crossover~ Reborn arrives in Namimori to train Tsuna unaware that Iemitsu might have left out a detail or two. Meanwhile, Ed and Al are reborn into the Sawada household and, well, Tsuna is their brother so of course they're not going to stand by and let canon happen.

End Class Princess - When first-year Tsunahime is tricked into showing up at the E-Class campus on the first day of middle school she has no idea that her entire life is about to change. Now stuck in E-Class and in the middle of an assassination classroom, Tsunahime finds herself blossoming under the care of Koro-sensei and her various senpai-turned-accidental classmates.

[richincolor]

Exploring Big Cities Via Novels

Exploring large cities can be a lot of fun, but my feet and knees can’t always take all of the running around. Visiting via novels (or graphic novels) makes it a lot easier. It’s clearly not the same experience, but I do enjoy a little tourism via literature. The last few young adult (or new adult) titles I’ve read take place in London, San Francisco, and New York with nods to quite a few of the local landmarks. I enjoyed each of these in different ways and appreciated seeing the cities through other eyes.

London on My Mind is a rom-com with a bit of family drama and a brush with royalty. Kisses, Codes, and Conspiracies has all that you might expect with the title including a bit of romance along with a few thrilling moments. Roaming leans more coming-of-age as college freshman wander through the streets of New York.

With all three, it was nice to experience the settings along with the characters. When I saw the Palace of Fine Arts in San Francisco while on a walk last night it definitely made me think of a specific scene in Kisses, Codes, and Conspiracies. I didn’t make it all the way there though since as often happens, my feet were done before the rest of me wanted to give up for the day. I’m thankful for these glimpses of cities from the comfort of my reading chair.

London on My Mind by Clara Alves translated by Nina Perrotta PUSH

Sixteen-year-old Dayana has always dreamed of visiting London — to walk along the Thames, take pictures outside Buckingham Palace, and maybe even get a glimpse of Arthur, Prince of Wales, whose marriage has been all over tabloids. But the trip of her dreams turns into a royal nightmare when her mother passes away. Now, Day must leave Rio de Janeiro to live with her estranged father and his new family in London.

As it turns out, the U.K. isn’t exactly Day’s cup of tea. She struggles to forgive her father for walking out on her and her mom all those years ago; fights with her stepsister constantly; detests her stepmother; and she can’t even see One Direction in concert because they’ve been broken up for ages. All she wants to do is trade the rainy skies of London for the sun and beaches of Rio.

That’s when she runs into the girl of her dreams — literally: The coincidentally named Diana, a witty, funny, redhead who was in the middle of . . . escaping Buckingham Palace? Something isn’t right here, but it makes Diana all the more alluring. As time passes, and the two girls grow closer, Day can’t help but wonder if there is more than a little truth to the rumors surrounding Prince Arthur — and if Diana might be involved somehow. Is it all in her head, or could Day be caught up in a real-life royal scandal?

Kisses, Codes, and Conspiracies by Abigail Hing Wen Feiwel & Friends – Available August 13, 2024 (Thanks to the ALA Convention for the ARC)

Tan Lee finds himself embroiled in an unusual love triangle, all while trying to defuse a heist, unravel a conspiracy, and navigate the most complicated babysitting assignment ever in this YA novel by national bestselling author Abigail Hing Wen.

After a magical kiss at Prom, best friends Tan Lee and Winter Woo agree to cool it off, a plan that goes awry when their parents jointly head off to Hawaii and leave Tan and Winter to babysit Tan’s sister Sana together. If that isn’t complicated enough, Tan’s ex-girlfriend from Shanghai arrives on his doorstep with money stolen from her billionaire father and thugs on her heels.

Tan soon finds himself on the run, trying to out-maneuver international hackers and protect his friends, family and sister – and his own heart.

Roaming by Jillian Tamaki & Mariko Tamaki Drawn & Quarterly

Spring break, 2009. High school best friends Zoe and Dani are now freshman college students, meeting in a place they’ve wanted to visit forever: New York City. Tagging along is Dani’s classmate Fiona, a mercurial art student with an opinion on everything. Together, the three cram in as much of the city as possible, gleefully falling into tourist traps, pondering so-called great works of art, sidestepping creeps, and eating lots and lots of pizza (folded in half, of course). Roaming is a ground-breaking graphic novel from the authors behind New York Times bestseller and Caldecott Honor Book This One Summer.

[fallensnowfan]

OP Academy's second half of chapter 49 is here!

Akainu talks about the cafe's menu. Koby wonders about the two sides of Akainu, the teacher and the waiter. Seems he's unsure if they are the same person.

Akainu recognizes Koby as Garp's prodigy, and Luffy as Dragon's son.

Conis and Perona and Akainu greet Luffy and Koby and ask them what they'd like to order. Koby returns their greeting and Luffy says he wants meat.

Koby orders pumpkin coffee and meat for them.

Akainu tells them other menu options that are available. Some of those said last time, and other menu options, and brings up an app students can use for the cafe.

Perona is surprised at how well "Akasaka" is doing on his first day.

She and Conis praise him for a job well done.

Perona and Akasaka talk about how this is a part time job for her, she says he is her kohai and that she's a middle school student. He tells Perona she should focus on studying not working.

The cafe's pumpkin parfait is shown off.

Perona and Akasaka argue about what Perona should be allowed to do and about hairstyles I believe, and Conis asks Perona to refrain from arguing in front of their customers. She then asks Luffy and Koby to be patient while waiting for their orders to be prepared.

Conis explains to Akasaka that she gets the pumpkins for the cafe from Ganfall, and that she will show him how to make the pumpkin parfait that the cafe serves.

The customers are happy with the parfait Akasaka made, Perona talks with another customer and they compliment each other's outfits and both are happy. Conis talks about how Perona is great with customers.

Doffy's fans return from chapter 24 too!

Outside the cafe, thugs from Oni Middle show up and start causing trouble, Perona, Luffy, and Koby head out to deal with them while Conis guides the customers to safety, and Luffy mentions Kaido. One of the Oni Middle students hits the parfait to the ground, so rude! Akasaka sees it and goes to confront the thugs.

Everyone recognizes "Akasaka" as one of the teachers at New World Middle, Akainu sensei, and he scares off the Oni Middle thugs with harsh words while activating his magma powers.

Akainu sends a magma punch at the Oni Middle thugs and they run off. He exchanges some words with Luffy, then with Conis and Perona, and they part ways with "Akasaka" on good terms.

Before leaving, Akainu turns around and says one of the cafe's mottos with gusto! "Arigatou Gozaimashita!!! Cure Cure Thank you♡!!!!" and everyone cheers and a dramatic narration occurs. Excellent, I love this chapter of Akainu's life.

"Sometime later," Akainu returns to the cafe, with Aokiji sensei and Kizaru sensei, and orders a complex order with ease, being familiar with the menu from his time working there. His familiarity with the menu confuses the other two teachers, though Conis and Perona happily greet him.

Next chapter is on the 3rd/4th of October!

[edgepunk]

some Earth-2710 Peter Parker headcanons (? is it even a headcanon if it's my AU? I guess lol) because he's rattling around in my brain

Freckly boy - not very noticeable on his face, but he's got more visible freckles on his body, especially his shoulders

He has a mole on the left side of his chin. MJ thinks it's cute (so does Johnny)

If it's humid, his hair gets curly, but it's usually flattened because of his mask

If you squint, you'll notice that his teeth are a teensy tiny bit crooked. That's because of how often he gets kicked/punched in the face by thugs or his villains. In this AU, his enhanced healing extends to his teeth, i.e. he lost his teeth a lot of times, but they regrow rather fast, although slightly crooked.

Speaking of his teeth, his canines got a little sharper when he got bit. It's hard to notice, only when he grins or shows his teeth in any way. He was a little bit self-conscious about it for a short while, because he thought they were actually venomous. They aren't lol

Got a degree in applied physics, but barely passed due to his hectic life. He almost dropped out at some point.

Considered working at Oscorp and even filled out a job application, but decided against it at the last minute. It was before he even knew what kind of person Norman truly was. So, he stayed working as a photographer at the Bugle with some delivery gigs for extra money. Years later, he became a teacher at a middle school.

His music taste is "whatever he likes" though he gravitates towards garage rock. It helps him focus.

Loves, loves fucking around with technology and figuring out how it works. He will disassemble anything that gets into his hands and analyze every part of it. Being poor and dumpster diving taught him how to make use of/reuse every bit of technology. He'd be good friends with Rocket Raccoon.

Knows how knit and sew, he's learned it from May.

He got his knack for photography from May, too. His first camera he used to take photos for the Bugle was May's old camera, which he found in the garage. May taught him how to use it, and some basics in photography to help him take better shots.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael Before Midnight: "Houdini" by Eminem

Eminem is one of the most controversial rappers of all time, and this reputation isn’t entirely undeserved. I mean, the man has an entire song that’s just six straight minutes of him acting out violently murdering his ex. Uncontroversial artists do not make songs like that. But I think people do give him a lot of shit and really try to underplay his genuine talent too, mainly because of how a lot of his work just hasn’t aged great.

You have to understand the time and place Em rose out of. The 90s was all about being nasty and politically incorrect, and the rap scene reflected that. The rise of gangster rap had guys talking about how cool the thug life was, and there were all sorts of vulgar tunes being cranked out (“Pregnant Pussy” is from the 90s, if that tells you anything). As a white boy in a cutthroat industry where black men are the kings being taken under the wing of the man who produced “Fuck tha Police,” Marshall Mathers really wasn’t gonna do anything other than assimilate into the culture of the time to survive. And it worked; he’s pretty much the only white rapper besides maybe the Beastie Boys who has kept a long and generally well-liked career. He played by the rules, made sure to acknowledge his place, kept his ego in check outside his songs, collaborated with the right people, and boom! Rap has its token white boy.

But the edgy violent white boy schtick that made Slim Shady so funny and… “endearing” back in the day is not really something people like in 2024. Since the 90s, edgy white boys like the Slim character have shot up schools, sexually assaulted women and gotten away with it, openly supported fascism, and whined about queer people and black people being in Star Wars. No one fucking likes a Slim because they’ve been ruining our world for a while now, so this character who was once a beloved aspect of Em’s career just doesn’t sit right with the people of today. Add onto the fact that he’s a middle aged man, and he can’t just be doing the same crap all these years later without looking like the cringiest man alive, a rapping Elon Musk. With all that, and the fact his upcoming album is called The Death of Slim Shady, you’d think maybe he’d drop a single to showcase how he’s evolved over his career, how his sobriety and fatherhood have changed him, and how the Slim persona is well and truly in the past.

Instead he released “Houdini.”

For better or for worse, this is a return to that classic late 90s/early 2000s Slim style, with everything that implies. Get ready for lots of references, offensive jokes, and more, cuz I’m going line by line to talk about the content of Slim Shady’s final comeback. And while I am going to analyze some of the lamer and more questionable jokes, I want to make it clear that I understand the Slim character is satirical and whatever. I'm not fucking dumb, and I've been listening to Eminem for 24 years now. Being satire is not an excuse to be unfunny.

After an ominous skit where Em’s manager Paul Rosenberg tells him he’s own his own for this album, we have an intro to kick the song off:

Guess who’s back, back again? Shady’s back, tell a friend Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? Guess who’s back? (Da-da-da, da, da, da, da, da, da) (Da-da-da, da, da, da, da)

As should be obvious to anyone with a passing knowledge of Eminem, this is a reuse of the intro of his classic “Without Me.” This is a double-edged sword; on the one hand, it is a fun little callback to his earlier career and helps once more establish that he’s bringing it like he did back then. But on the other hand, you’re reminding the audience of one of your best songs right off off the bat, so if this one doesn’t live up to that, you’re in for a world of hurt.

Now’s also a good time to mention that the song heavily samples “Abracadabra” by the Steve Miller Band. From what I’ve gathered, a lot of people find that song unbelievably corny… but that’s why I love it. And I mean, the song’s called “Houdini,” so why not sample the massive smash hit song that’s named after the famous magic words? Again, for me at least, sampling a song I already love means you’re gonna have to really kick it into high gear to make me want to listen to yours over what you’re sampling. There’s about a million songs that sample “When the Levee Breaks,” but how many of those do you think I’m putting on over Led Zeppelin, y’know?

Well, look what the stork brung (What?) Little baby devil with the forked tongue And it's stickin' out, yeah, like a sore thumb (Bleh) With a forehead that it grew horns from (Look) Still a white jerk (It's him), pullin' up in a Chrysler to the cypher With the Vics, Percs and a Bud Light shirt Lyrical technician (Yeah), an electrician (Yeah) Y'all light work (Haha) And I don't gotta play pretend, it's you I make believe (What?) And you know I'm here to stay 'cause me (Why?) If I was to ever take a leave (What?) It would be aspirin' to break a feve' (Yeah)

So far it’s been pretty solid. It’s pretty clear Em’s still got it, great flow, delivery, subtle nods to his past work, boasts about his skills, talking about how he started from the bottom… It’s nothing really groundbreaking, but it’s at least continuing the idea that Slim is back, baby! I sure hope he doesn’t derail his momentum in the next couple of lines with a stupid, cringeworthy jab at a woman who literally never did anything to him!

If I was to ask for Megan Thee (What?) Stallion if she would collab with me Would I really have a shot at a feat? (Haha) I don't know, but I'm glad to be back like

So a little context here, for those not in the know: In 2022, rapper Megan Thee Stallion accused fellow rapper Tory Lanez of shooting at her feet and saying, “Dance, bitch, dance” like he’s a comic book mobster. The case was taken to court, where Lanez was found guilty and then sentenced to up to 22 years in jail. Now, the two have shouted out each other before—Em interpolataed the hook of Megan’s song “Body” in 2021’s “Killer (Remix),” while Megan referenced “The Real Slim Shady” on her feature on Lil Nas X’s “DOLLA SIN SLIME”--but I’m not really sure the two are close to the point where it’s cool for Em to jokingly reference the time some psychopath acted like a Batman villain to her. The fact Megan’s 2024 diss track “Hiss” referenced Mariah Carey’s “Obsessed,” which was about Eminem, does make me side-eye this bar.

But hey, one corny, cringey joke is whatever. Let’s see how the rest of the song goes:

Abra-abracadabra (And for my last trick) I'm 'bout to reach in my bag, bruh (Like) Abra-abracadabra (And for my last trick, poof) Just like that and I'm back, bro

So this is the chorus, and I have to say it’s incredibly lazy and boring. It’s just an Eminem-themed parody of the original chorus, and it’s not especially interesting. That being said, by token of being a chorus of a song I already like just with lyrical alterations, I don’t think it’s bad either. I just expect a little more cleverness from Eminem.

Now, back in the days of old me (When?) Right around the time I became a dope fiend (Oh) Ate some codeine as a way of coping (Mm) Taste of opiates, case of O.E. Turned me into smiley face emoji (Woo)

Here, now we’re back on track! Em is reflecting on his old self and talking about his drug-addled early career! Surely he’ll stay the course here and dig deep into his manic persona that was partly created by his addictions, and not veer off into alt-right talking points and child abuse jokes!

My shit may not be age-appropriate But I will hit an eight-year-old in the face with a participation trophy 'Cause I have zero doubts That this whole world's 'bout To turn into some girl scouts That censorship bureau's out to (Shut me down) So when I started this verse It did start off lighthearted at first (Hmm) But it feels like I'm targeted

Hoo boy, we’re whining about how “sensitive” the world is becoming and how censorship is coming to get you! Eminem is going full boomer now. But hey, maybe he has a point! You can’t sing songs where you violently murder the mother of your child and then abduct said child anymore, because of woke. You can’t rap about mass shootings right after they happen either, also because of woke. Whatever, grandpa. Let’s see if you have anything of actual substance.

Mind-bogglin' how my profit has skyrocketed Look what I pocketed Yeah, the shit is just like y'all had been light joggin', and I've been runnin' at full speed And that's why I'm ahead like my noggin', and I'm the fight y'all get in When you debate who the best, but opps, I'm white chalkin' when I step up to that mic, cock it then "Oh my God, it's him! Not again!"

Just some pre-chorus boasting topped off with a throwback to his song “As the World Turns.” It doesn’t completely erase the bad taste of his whiny boomerisms out of your mouth, but it’s at least something.

Sometimes, I wonder what the old me'd say (If what?) If he could see the way shit is today (Look at this shit, man) He'd probably say that everything is gay (Like happy) What's my name? What's my name? (Slim Shady)

Em’s had a long, troubled reputation with queerness. He came under a lot of fire for homophobia back in the day, but then his friendship with Elton John happened. There’s also his brief appearance in the Seth Rogen movie The Interview, where he plays himself as a closeted gay man. Even still, he’s often used queerness as jokes in his songs, mainly as an attempt to emasculate his opponents (something he even did to an actual queer rapper, Tyler the Creator). As a bisexual man myself, I do find it tasteless in general, but in the context of this song I thing it’s ok. Like yeah, the homophobic crackhead Slim Shady persona would call the world we live in gay. The line still feels a little weird, though; is the Slim persona actually singing this song, or is this Em reflecting on the Slim persona? It kind of muddies the water, and makes it hard to figure just how seriously we’re supposed to be taking everything here.

So how many little kids still wanna act like me? (Haha) I'm a bigger prick than cacti be (Yeah) And that's why these (What?) Words sting just like you were being attacked by bees (Bzz) In the coupe, leaning back my seat (What?) Bumpin' R. Kelly's favorite group (Uh), the black guy (Guy) pees (Pees, haha) In my Air Max 90s White Ts, walkin' parental advisory

Verse three starts off pretty good! The R. Kelly joke is extremely juvenile and crass, but that’s the sort of thing I enjoy from Slim. It may be low-hanging fruit, but that’s the fruit you wanna grab the most. Now what wacky sort of humor is Slim going to bring to this verse next? Surely he won’t make some incredibly stupid and corny joke that isn’t funny in the slightest and derails the whole song!

My transgender cat's Siamese (Why?) Identifies as black, but acts Chinese (Haha)

According to Genius, this line might actually be a reference to a Dave Chapelle bit from 2019’s Sticks & Stones. If that’s the case, I really don’t need to say much more. There’s no way to read this line in anything other than the worst possible light.

Like a motherfuckin' Hacky Sack, I treat (What?) The whole world 'cause I got it at my feet (Yeah) How can I explain to you (What?) That even myself I'm a danger to? (Yeah) I hop on tracks like a kangaroo And say a few things or two to anger you

So he does openly admit he says fucked up stuff to get a rise out of people. Going in to the song, I knew this. The guy’s a provocateur, it’s what he does, and the Slim persona has always been about being as flagrantly offensive as possible. But the thing is, even the stuff here I’m taking issue with doesn’t make me mad; I’m more disappointed than anything, really. Like he has to know that times have changed and people really aren’t all in on this sort of humor anymore, right? What is the point of bringing Slim back to a world that has evolved beyond him, even if to finally kill him off? If that’s what he wanted to do he could do it without trying to showcase the dated humor. This is the musical equivalent of watching an 80s sex comedy like Porky’s or Revenge of the Nerds. Like maybe it was funny way back when, but looking back at it through a modern lens it’s just really gross and unpleasant and full of terrible messages.

But fuck that, if I think that shit, I'ma say that shit Cancel me, what? Okay, that's it Go ahead, Paul, quit, snake-ass prick You male cross dresser (Haha), fake-ass bitch And I'll probably get shit for that (Watch) But you can all suck my dick, in fact Fuck them, fuck Dre, fuck Jimmy, fuck me, fuck you Fuck my own kids, they're brats (Fuck 'em) They can screw off (Yeah), them and you all (Uh) You too, Paul (Punk), got two balls Big as RuPaul's (Woah) What you thought you saw ain't what you saw (Nah) 'Cause you're never gon' see me Caught sleepin' and see the kidnappin' never did happen Like Sherri Papini, Harry Houdini I vanish into the thin air as I'm leavin' like

The rest of the final verse, save for another tired shot at cancel culture, is fine. I might even say it’s a bit funny; I like him taking at shot at Dre, himself, everyone he’s worked with, his own kids… That part is where it is really obvious the whole thing is tongue-in-cheek, because he is by all accounts a good and loving dad. Making fun of RuPaul and Papini are fine in my book too.

So I’ve been pretty critical of this song and rather unamused by a lot of its jokes. This must mean I hate it, right? Well… no. I can’t say I love it, but I really don’t think this is awful. Trust me, I’ve heard awful Eminem and this isn’t it. “Just Lose It” and “We Made You” are light years ahead of this song in terms of awfulness. On top of that, this is also the first single off of an album that’s all about killing Slim—I don’t really have the full context. For all I know, this could be part of an overarching concept of the album, Slim’s last ride before his inevitable death, and in that regard this is definitely a perfect modern take on the classic Slim Shady song, warts and all. We just live in a world where his kind of humor doesn’t age badly, it just ends up dead on arrival more often than not.

If nothing else, it still showcases Eminem has great flow, great wit, clever writing… and that’s what he should stick to instead of making tired, unfunny boomer jokes about cancel culture and queer people just to rile people up. Hopefully that’s what the rest of the album will be like when it drops. I doubt I’m going to review every single song on it since I’m no Todd in the Shadows and my musical knowledge is very casual, but maybe I’ll give my opinions. Until that time, though, I think I’ll just listen to “Venom” again.