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aidemint · 4 years

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Messenger - Zuko

Word Count: 3.2k !

Warnings: None!

Note: This is a plot I’ve been wanting to try for a while! For the sake of the story, Mai and Zuko broke up indefinitely. As much as I love them, I can’t have things get too “complicated.”

It started as an ordinary day. Perhaps one that began too well. I woke up to the sound of turtle-ducks quacking in a nearby pond as a colorful array of birds lined the canopy, chirping to the melody that the trees gave off when they shook in the light breeze. I yawned and rubbed my eyes with the backs of my hands as I woke up from my resting state underneath a large oak. Shaking my head a few times, I blinked and got my eyes to focus on my surroundings, and patted my side to make sure that my bag was still there.

Ah, the familiar feel of leather and sturdy cloth.

After the reassurance, I took the time to stretch a bit before getting up to get ready for the day. The morning procedure was conventional -- extremely so. Brush your teeth, bathe, dry, then scavenge for some food. Berries or nuts weren’t exactly rare to come by anywhere, so it wasn’t hard to find a hearty meal.

A day in the life of a messenger.

Humming as I stripped down, I discarded my clothes, shoving them into my messenger bag, then brought the satchel with me to the riverbed to decrease the risk of theft. The impact of my feet on the ground made the grass quiver and specks of dirt come flying into the air, tickling my soles and upper-ankles. When I finally set my belongings down, I sighed in content and watched as the surface of the stream glimmered, reflecting the sunlight. It certainly looked inviting.

Finally, it was time to bathe.

Shivering as I tip-toed into the cold water, I wrapped my arms around my chest and hoped I didn’t catch some sort of disease. I wasn’t used to such a different climate, as I’d normally opt for some hot springs when they were available, but I was in the valley and didn’t have the time nor the energy to make that trek all the way up the mountain.

I groaned and plunged shoulder-level into the river, feeling the running water push lightly against my figure. The sensation was surprisingly calming, considering that I was initially cringing at how frigid it was. As the edges of my lips upturned and my eyes fluttered shut, my body relaxed and I was able to enjoy the sweet empathy that nature provided me with.

After soaking for what felt like a few minutes, I heard a rustling in the bushes. Assuming that it was either some wayward badger skunk of platypus bear, I paid no attention to it until there came voices from that general direction.

“Zuko, I told you we shouldn’t have come this way. Privacy is a big thing around these parts.” There was an old man and his presumed nephew, wandering around the forest of oak trees and through a few bushes. I couldn’t get a clear view of the uncle, but I noticed a small clearing that the younger boy could step out into for me to peer at him. Hoping that he’d move according to plan, I craned my neck to get a glimpse at him.

“Privacy? In a valley? What, are we gonna run into a couple of naked mole rats?” Once the brunette emerged from his place hidden in the bunches of leaves and into an open spot, I got to recognizing him. My eyes widened and my lips parted, truly not expecting the company. Prince Zuko, the “traitorous” son of Fire Lord Ozai, was in Fengfu Valley, and I was right under his nose. It shocked me how little perception he had of his surroundings. Feeling the urge to laugh, I clamped a hand over my mouth to hide my presence and stooped lower into the water so my nose was right above the surface.

I couldn’t help but want to exploit his careless nature -- it seemed like it would be a lively addition to an otherwise boring morning.

Teasing him would be fun.

“I don’t appreciate being called a mole rat!” I watched on as Zuko shouted in surprise, then sent a bolt of fire my way. Narrowly avoiding it, I swam to the side and watched as the flame dissipated as soon as it reached the spot where I previously resided. Turning my head so I faced him, we locked gazes as I feigned offense.

“Seriously?” When the prince’s face morphed into one of surprise, I burst out laughing, almost getting swept away by the river at the effort. My howls ceased as I stumbled a bit and felt the rapids churn in an attempt to carry me down its bed, but I regained my footing and remained in my original place.

Breathing a sigh of relief, I once again directed my attention to the brunette, who just stood with his hands clasped over his eyes. Snickering at the sight, I slipped to hide behind a bush as I dried myself and put on my clothes. Stepping out into the open once I was finished, I gave Iroh a small salute while walking towards the pair, which he returned with a fond grin.

“You should listen to your uncle more often, friend!” I exclaimed, stopping in front of the Prince with my bad slung across a shoulder, “Don’t come across mindful people in these parts very often. It’s mostly populated with bandits, so most are pretty wary.” Noticing the pair’s interesting Earth Kingdom getup, I raised my eyebrows, impressed with the guise. I didn’t have long to admire their getups, however, as Iroh took the initiative to start a conversation in the midst of my thinking.

“Since we can’t avoid an interaction any longer, we might as well introduce ourselves. My name is Mushi, and this is my nephew Lee. We’re simple travelers, so it’s nice to meet a local from around these parts.” I nodded at him and smiled at Zuko, who still seemed a bit on edge from our unconventional introduction.

“I’m (Y/N). I work as a messenger for the international mailing system. I deliver letters to and from different nations, but I’m stationed in the Earth Kingdom most of the time, helping to run mail through the city, manually.” Iroh, or Mushi, nodded in understanding,

“An honorable profession.” I smiled, then thanked him for his kindness. Glancing at “Lee,” I noticed that he didn’t seem very eager to respond, so I just left him alone and continued to talk to Iroh.

“Well, Mushi,” I began, “Do you have a place to stay?” Iroh was quick to respond, but not without a sudden shift in his demeanor. His shoulders suddenly caved inwards and his eyebrows became furrowed, giving his face a worn, wrinkled look.

“Unfortunately not. My nephew and I don’t have anywhere to go, either.” I bit back a smile at his overbearingly dejected tone and the sudden slump in his posture when trying to evoke some sense of pity from me. Covering my mouth with a hand, I sucked in a breath to calm down, coughing a bit to disguise my laughter.

“W-Well,” I said, clearing my throat, “You can stay at my camp for the time being. I’ll show you the ropes, but you have to hunt your own food.” To my complete and utter surprise, Iroh’s posture and mood had suddenly improved upon hearing this. His eyes seemed to sparkle as a grateful grin spread across his face.

“That would be wonderful. Thank you for your offer.” I waved it off, then beckoned for the two to follow me to camp, where I had a tent set up and a couple of logs for a campfire. Though I didn’t have much, the former General’s reaction made me feel like some kind of saint for agreeing to take care of them out of common courtesy.

Perhaps his methods of persuasion had more of an influence on me than I originally thought.

Evening had come, and Zuko and I were currently out foraging for berries and nuts while Iroh was back at camp, tending to a fire in order to brew some tea and to hopefully get the pot hot enough to be able to cook the nuts.

At the moment, the Prince and I had stumbled across an undergrowth that housed a variety of different bushes and trees, all filled with berries and fruits, respectively. The silence of nature overtook us as we worked to fill the baskets we carried with the bounty -- a sound that was familiar to me, but seemed to be uncomfortable for Zuko, so much so that he decided to pipe up for the first time today.

“Hey, (Y/N)?” I whipped my head around to face him with an amused expression.

“You finally wanna talk, huh?” He sighed and rolled his eyes in the other direction, setting his basket down, but not knowing what to do with his hands. Curling them into fists, then letting go again, the cycle repeated for half a minute before he found the right sentence to say.

“I’m usually not this awkward, I promise,” he commented, rubbing the nape of his neck. I laughed, noticing the Prince’s bright red face, flushed from embarrassment.

“I can tell,” I replied, digging into a bush and pocketing some wild blueberries, “So don’t worry too much about it. I don’t mind the silence -- I hear it all the time.” He stiffly nodded and picked up his basket again to collect some pears from a tree overhead.

“Thanks.” The world then went silent for a few minutes until Zuko spoke again, his voice more relaxed this time around.

“And sorry about the naked mole rat thing. I didn’t really expect anyone to be there.”

“Don’t sweat it. I wouldn’t expect a naked person to be in a river in the middle of a valley either.”

“Okay… thanks.” I chuckled quietly to myself, finding hilarity in how uncoordinated Zuko seemed to be in the realm of speaking. It was almost endearing.

After a good twenty minutes had lapsed, it was safe to say that both of us had deserved a break. As I plopped down onto a moss-covered section of the floor, I patted the ground next to where I sat, motioning for Zuko to rest alongside me.

“Sit down with me, Lee.” He hesitated for a moment, but ended up sitting next to me anyways. While we rested, I admired the way the canopy of the forest blocked the sunlight, so that the rays would cast themselves in dappled patterns across the ground. Fluttering my eyelids shut, I took a deep breath, then exhaled slowly, enjoying the forest’s energy and the rejuvenating effect it had on my spirit. As I opened my eyes to see the world again, I sighed in a mix of disappointment and appreciation. The tranquility was pleasurable, but always too brief.

I didn’t notice Zuko until I felt his hand nearing my bag, to which I responded to with a sudden pull away, not letting him even graze the satchel. He seemed alarmed by this, as his eyes immediately went dark and his body tensed up. Panicking as I noticed this, I tried to explain as quickly and as simplistically as possible.

“People’s letters are in there,” I said, “I can’t let you touch them without a license. It’s illegal.” Zuko glowered at me. His eyes bore into mine, golden, glaring irises seeking the truth in the myriad of lies. He leaned in closer to me, his scowl deepening.

“There is no need for mailing by foot in the Earth Kingdom. They have their own postal service with the rock cart system.” I sucked in a sharp breath as I prayed that he wouldn’t connect the dots, as hopeless as my wish was.

Zuko pointed at my bag.

“Those aren’t really letters, are they?” The prince’s question challenged me, yet it was laced with so much hidden curiosity and an element of certainty pounded into each and every word. I sighed as I realized that the jig was up. I had to tell him the truth, or he might become unstable and try to pull something with me. Taking out the envelopes, I unwrapped them, then showed the Prince the contents inside.

“You got me,” I admitted, handing Zuko the sheets of paper I held in my hand, “They’re not letters.” The brunette’s eyes scanned over the folio, gradually widening in disbelief. Once he was done reading, he handed the documents back to me and looked at me with such incredulity.

“What are those papers?” he demanded, “They have the Fire Nation seal on them.” I shrugged indifferently while putting the sheets back into their envelopes.

“They’re stolen Fire Nation Official documents,” I responded casually. The Prince seemed so caught up in this order of business, while I admittedly did not want to continue this conversation for much longer. His infatuation irked me, but it was natural, given his background, so I had no other choice but to endure it.

“How did you even get them?” he demanded, “Who are you?”

“I should be asking you the same question, Prince Zuko,” I snapped, not willing to take any more of his attitude. He looked taken aback yet flustered at the same time. I assumed that he didn’t realize that someone would recognize the guy with a very noticeable scar on his face. I scoffed at the thought.

“Do you really expect me not to know who you are, Mr. ‘Esteemed Prince of the Fire Nation?’” He grew increasingly bewildered, looking at me as if I had two horns growing out of my head, and as if he wasn’t the son of the most notorious tyrant in all the four nations. “Sure, most people in the Earth Kingdom have no clue who you guys are, but I might have a clue, you know? Given the documents and everything?”

“But why… How did you even get these?” Zuko stammered, “This is classified information.”

“I looted them from Fire Nation officers.”

“Why-” he began, “Why are you-” As he looked to me for some form of help, I motioned for him to continue thinking on his own. He furrowed his eyebrows and kept at it. A few moments later, something seemed to click inside his mind.

“You’re…” Realization dawned on Zuko as his expression morphed into one of vulnerable understanding. “You’re part of the Resistance. Against the Fire Nation.”

“Bingo.” He furrowed his brows and brought a hand up to point at me following my confirmation.

“You’re the one responsible for the missing contract for the Huo act.”

“Yeah.”

“You stole a cart filled with bills that lowered the minimum age for recruited soldiers.”

“Mhm.”

“And the papers for Baron Hu Jiao’s coal mines.”

“Uh huh.”

“And you’re-”

“You’re making me sound like a saint here, Zuko,” I interrupted, chuckling, “I’m just doing what any normal person would do in the face of tyranny.” He paused, creased his eyebrows and slightly pursed his lips, then looked away, as if contemplating some serious matter. I cocked my head and laughed softly at the sight, entertained by the Prince’s reaction to my words.

“You seem confused.” I turned to him. “Is there anything you want to ask me?” He huffed, contorting his face into an expression that was strangely reminiscent of one at a loss for words, though he spoke after my inquiry.

“Why did you even join the rebellion? Why would you risk your life for something so… so dangerous? So...” I felt a burning sensation in my chest as Zuko’s breath ran out before he could finish. He made no attempt at restating his two-word sentence, feeling as if it was best to just leave it there, as is. I sighed.

“Were you going to say futile?” Zuko scratched his head and nodded. I huffed.

“Why do people join the army, then? Just to die in trivial combat?” I challenged coyly, the edges of my lips curling into a smirk, “Why do people join task forces if they’re not worth fighting for?”

“Because they’re forced to.” The prince’s tone was cold. His words were hardened by some experience I knew not of, and it was only then I realized that I had been wrong.

I folded my hands in my lap and spoke in a much quieter voice from there on.

“I apologize.” Zuko paused for a moment to recollect himself, taking a deep breath in and letting it gradually come out.

“It’s okay.” I smiled at his comment.

“Do you want to hear more of my story? Of the resistance?” Zuko hummed.

“Okay.”

“I only knew of the Resistance from the propaganda that was set up in the middle of the Capitol. I’d see the faces of those men and women and wonder what they had done to earn their titles as ‘savages,’ ‘freaks of nature,’ and ‘traitors.’ I’d always ask about them. But I’d always never get an answer.

“The first time I ever had personal contact with them was after my fathers perished in the army. I went through a lot of grief, in the early stages. I wouldn’t eat, I wouldn’t socialize, probably because of the trauma. When nobody wanted me, when the Fire Nation threatened to kick me out for not being a valuable citizen, they took me in. Treated me well, taught me a lot of things that I’d originally been brainwashed to ignore by propaganda. They gave me hope and a reason to live. It was more than I could ask for, at the time.

“And I realized what I wanted. I knew that I wanted out of this dystopian society so I rebelled against it. I stole papers and caused as much of a ruckus as I could, fueled by this opportunity for revenge. I wanted to tear the place down.” I laughed sadly at the thought.

“But, as you said, it’s futile. I can’t go against so many people. None of us can. The numbers have always been dwindling.” I looked down, at the forest floor, embarrassed to admit the notion. “But we try.” The soft sounds of crickets chirping in the grass were the only noises that could be heard when I finished talking. Zuko just sat there, seemingly dumbfounded by the information that was relayed to him.

“I-I’m sorry,” he spoke, awkwardly glancing at my face, trying to morph his features into an expression of comfort. I chuckled at his behavior.

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” Quietness settled in the atmosphere once more after I uttered the last phrase. I tilted my head up at the sky and admired the blend of colors it had become. Lavender hues mixed with vermillion tints to create a wondrous sight to sit under and enjoy.

Zuko and I sat together for what seemed like forever, simply enjoying each other’s company.

After the purple and red sky had passed and the stratosphere held a darker red and orange coloration, I decided that it was best to haul ass and go back to camp based on how little day we had left. I offered a hand to Zuko, helped him stand up, and picked up my basket, preparing to go back to camp. The brunette did the same with his basket and started to follow me back.

“Thank you for listening,” I suddenly said, turning to face him, “It’s been a long time since I could open up to someone like this. I really enjoyed this evening.” Zuko’s expression remained indifferent, but there seemed to be a new, small glitter within his irises.

“Yeah.” The corners of his lips lifted just a bit. “I did too.”

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blueroseblaze · 4 years

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If You’ll Have Me: Chapter 1

Read also on Ao3 here

The tinkering of metal harmonized with the soft music of the radio as you and Nero continued inspecting the van. Nico had long since gone home, saddling the two of you with the rest of the work. You didn’t mind though, any time you could spend with Nero was time well spent, even while doing menial labor.

“You okay?” Nero asked as he rolled out from underneath the massive vehicle, “You seem quiet.”

“Oh, I’m fine,” you replied, “Just zoning out.”

Nero nodded, not pressing the issue any further. He stood from the roller seat and discarded the tools in his hand. He walked over to the sink in the corner, using the hem of his tank top to wipe away the sweat from his brow. You couldn’t keep yourself from catching a glimpse of his toned stomach as he did. But you quickly snapped yourself out of it.

Bad look, you thought, He’s with Kyrie.

“See something you like?” Nero teased from the other side of the garage, not even turning around to face you.

You clammed up and froze. Had you been so obvious? You continued staring at him, a guilty blush creeping up your face, exasperated by his turning his head and shooting you’re a snarky wink. You snapped your head away from his direction as he continued cleaning up.

You couldn’t escape the awkward silence, even the radio did little to ease your anxiety. Until an angel’s voice broke through the air.

“Nero! (Y/N)! Dinner’s almost ready!”

“We’ll be right there!” the young devil hunter called back. He turned to you from the sink, his expression as if the previous exchange never happened, yet there was a knowing glint in his crisp blue eyes.

“You staying?” he asked.

“Of course,” you replied with a smile, “If you’ll have me.”

“Always.”

You started to freshen up yourself hocking your tools onto the nearest surface and making way for the door. Nero stayed behind to finish tidying up and encouraged you to go on ahead. You stole one last look before making your way into the house.

The warm, welcoming aroma of Kyrie’s food wafted through the house, carrying you towards the kitchen. Your empty stomach growled the closer you got to the source. Turning the corner, you took a big breath in, exaggerating your reaction only a little to alert her to your presence.

“Hungry?” she asked in the songbird voice of hers.

“You know it,” you replied, “Nero will be in in a minute, he’s finishing up out there.”

“Well in that case you want to help me finish here and set the table?”

With little more than a nod you trotted over to the cabinet and pulled down the plates, cradling them in one arm as you searched the drawers for silverware. Hands full, you stepped into the dining room. You stole a look over your shoulder back towards the kitchen, listening to Kyrie humming a pleasant tune. You felt a smile stretch across your face, not realizing you had been stock still the whole time, not until a gentle had rested on your shoulder and Kyrie’s voice cut through your haze.

“(Y/N)? Are you alright?” she asked.

You nearly dropped everything in your arms as your heart skipped a beat. Your eyes met hers and you noted her concerned expression.

“I-I’m fine,” you said, “Just lost in thought.”

“You been doing that a lot lately.”

“Yeah there’s just been a lot on my mind. But I’m fine, promise!” you reassured her.

She looked rather incredulously at you before removing her hand from your shoulder. Her hand lingered on you for a moment, her fingers feather light as she reluctantly pulled away. You took in a deep breath and resumed setting the table, cursing yourself for getting so distracted.

You sighed defeatedly. There’s no point in letting yourself get hurt like this. They are happy together; they’ve been happy together. There’s no room for you. They only have you around because you’re a close friend, nothing more.

You felt tears prick at your eyes as you set the last plate down. You’d been getting careless. The wanton glances and lingering stares would get you in trouble soon enough, no matter how nonchalant they seems when you got caught. You suspected they suspected you. And you couldn’t help the anger at yourself that rose in your chest. Luckily, your back was till turned to Kyrie, and you quickly pranced to the bathroom once the last piece of table wear was set. You locked the door and supported yourself against the counter, staring at the flushed mess that was your face.

Why do you keep doing this to yourself? Hanging around, savoring every passing glance or soft touch, no matter the context. You had to be some kind of desperate masochist. This couldn’t go on; you would only be hurting yourself and being a burden on them. This should be the last time you let yourself feel like this. Do everyone a favor and cut yourself out. Make this last time enjoyable, then dial it back.

You gasped at the knock on the other side of the door. You quickly composed yourself and let out a sound of acknowledgment.

“You okay in there,” Nero’s voice was muffled on the other side.

“Yeah I’m fine, just finishing washing up,” you lied.

“Ok don’t rush yourself we won’t eat without you,” he said.

“Don’t worry about me help yourselves.”

There was silence after that indicating he had left. Thank god, you thought, another confrontation dodged. You worked quickly, running the cool water from the faucet, and pressing damp towel to your face to relieve the redness in your eyes. This wasn’t the first time you had been driven to tears by your near addiction to your friends, but it was the first time you were so close to getting caught. There’s no good explanation if they had caught a glimpse of your distraught face. No allergies, no bullshit reminder of some stupid thing that made you sad. If you had gotten caught there was no way you would be able to talk yourself out of it. At least not without revealing to them that you were obviously lying to their faces.

Besides, how are you supposed to explain this to your friends, your friends that you have known since childhood, your friends that you followed to the mainland from the tiny island you all grew up on, your friends that have been together for years. How are you supposed to explain to them that you’ve been in love with both of them for so long? You can’t.

Which is why this has to end. You can’t keep letting yourself hurt like this. Why can’t you just let yourself stop hurting?

After a few more minutes you were presentable, a slightly bluish still permeating your face but nothing to give away the tears that flowed down your cheeks just moments before. You looked into the mirror and sighed before opening the bathroom door.

You walked into the dining room, surprised that dinner hadn’t been touched yet despite both Nero and Kyrie sitting there, plates empty.

“Did you wait for me?” you asked.

“Of course, we did,” Kyrie exclaimed with a smile.

“Why wouldn’t we wait for you?” Nero asked, slouched in his chair with his arm hanging off the back.

You gave them a smile that expressed both gratitude and annoyance, “But I said not to I don’t want it to get cold while you wait for me.”

Nero chastised you playfully before demanding you sit down.

Dinner was great, like it always was. Kyrie’s cooking could not be beat. It was a banquette of roast beef, potatoes, and mixed vegetables, enough to feed a small army. Or a hungry Nero. You also knew she made enough for you to take plenty home with you when you left. So thoughtful of her.

“And then I punched that ugly bastard right off the side of the bridge and timed how long it took until we heard it splash,” Nero chuckled, “Those army guys were certainly impressed.”

“You’re still not used to all the praise are you?” Kyrie inquired.

The evening was filled with chatter, laughter --mostly at Nero’s expense—and just general pleasantries. You swear you could listen to either of them talk about anything for hours and enjoy every minute of it. Nero’s improvements in his weaponry and his increased proficiency with his Devil Trigger form. Or Kyrie’s new craft project she’s begging you to try with her, because she thinks you’d be great at it. You hung on every word. You wanted to savor this, because you knew this would be the last time you could indulge in such a way. This had to be it, to save both yourself and your relationship with them. Sure, they would ask questions about your increased absence and why you suddenly started turning down their invitations, but it would be healthier in the long run.

Even after everyone was full, you all still sat around the table as the food got cold just talking, laughing, enjoying each other’s company. Kyrie even brought out a bottle of wine. Despite none of you really drinking that often the evening was filled with an air of “why not?”. Both you and Nero sneered jokingly into your glasses, wine was always more Kyrie’s anyway, but you sucked it up and indulged in the bitter juice.

The bottle was half empty by the time it was agreed to bring the evening to a pause. You didn’t need to be tipsy on your way home, you reasoned. But you did stay to help clean up the dishes and put way leftovers. Kyrie tried to help but You and Nero refused, she cooked, so you cleaned. That’s how these things worked.

Now here you were standing shoulder to shoulder with the snowy haired devil hunter. You washing, him drying. You glanced over, noticing him taking an excruciatingly long time drying off each dish or pot you handed him. He didn’t look at you and seemed lost in thought like he was contemplating something, but you chose not to ask.

That ache in your chest was starting to grow again, starting with the swell of admiration and want for his closeness but only to be poisoned by your conscious screaming at you. Asking who you thought you were to catch feelings for two people already so committed to each other. An emotional vampire, a parasite feeding off the happiness of your friends’ relationship. What kind of homewrecker were you to even think about feeling this way?

You bit your lip, trying not to feel the burn behind your eyes as you gradually reached your limit again. You focused on your task, hoping that focusing on your hands only will distract you. You didn’t notice Nero look over his shoulder, or Kyrie approach you from behind. Despite your focus on your hands, you felt the atmosphere change. You slowly lowered the soapy dish into the water and turned your head to meet the gaze of your friends.

Kyrie stood a few feet from you and Nero. You could see the nervous look on her face as she played with her fingers, barley keeping eye contact with you. She shifted her eyes between you and Nero as Nero leaned against the counter, crossing his arms securely over his chest.

You heart rate spiked, panic running through your body.

Oh god, you thought, this is it. They found you out. They know how you feel and now they’re going to kick you out. Who could blame them? Who would want to keep a desperate lonely leech like you around? They were just being nice to you so they wouldn’t hurt your feelings but now they’ve had enough. Now they’re done with you. They’re going to tell you to leave and never come back.

The voice in your head continued to berate you with scenario after scenario of them letting you down easy, screaming at you, throwing you out onto the street. This didn’t help you with trying to keep a new reservoir of tears from brewing behind your eyes that they will notice any minute now. Keep it together…

“(Y/N),” Kyrie started in her beautiful melodic voice, “Nero and I want to talk to you about something.”

You swallowed a lump in your throat, “What is it? Is everything ok?” you asked.

“Nothing’s wrong,” Nero started, “We just have sort of a… proposal, for you.”

“Okay…?” You crossed your own arms over yourself protectively.

Nero moved so that he and Kyrie were both facing you and you would much rather be facing down a firing squad at this point.

Kyrie started again, “We’ve all known each other for a very long time, and you’re our best friend. You’re so smart and funny and kind. We don’t know what we would do without you around. We love spending time with you, and we always hate to see you leave.”

She’s just buttering you up to make this less painful… Or maybe? Maybe she’s softening you up to make it hurt that much more to get you to stay away.

It was at this point that Nero spoke up, “We can always talk to you about anything we’re dealing with and you’re always there for us. You never judged me when you found out about me being part demon. You were there when I lost my arm and when I found out about my father.”

“When we lost Credo,” Kyrie added sullenly, “You’re basically family to us we’re so close, and we love you. I know we say it a lot but I don’t think it shows how we really feel.”

You remained silent, taking in their words that warmed your heart but still left you anxious. Where was this going, really? It was true though, you were always there for them when they needed help, because that’s what friends do. You know they would always do the exact same for you. Like when Kyrie brings you hot soup and beverages when you’re sick, or when Nero patches you up if you get too close to a demon. That’s just what friends do for each other.

“When we say we love you,” Nero said, “We mean it. And not in like a family way… we…”

Kyrie took over, “We wanted to ask you, if you would like to join us.”

Your eyes widened and your mouth fell agape just slightly. This couldn’t be real. They can’t be asking what you think they’re asking. They probably just joined a new mainland church or they need an extra person to take care of the kids at the orphanage. There’s no way that they…

“Join you?” you repeated.

“We want you to be a part of our relationship, so it would be the three of us instead of just me and Kyrie.”

You dropped your gaze, looking down and shaking your head in disbelief. They were really asking. You couldn’t believe it, this had to be a dream. One you would wake up from any moment alone in your own bed at home.

“If you’re not interested we get it,” Nero said seeing your look of disbelief. Hopefully, he didn’t think it was offense. “We don’t want to force you into anything we just need to get our feelings out there.”

“Kyrie you…” you began struggling to express your thoughts, “I didn’t know that you were…”

“It’s never something I ever really explored but I always felt deep down, especially fpr you. Nero and I did a lot of talking and we found out we both feel the same way for you that we do for each other. There’s just something there that we couldn’t ignore any longer. So, if you want to give it a try, we would want nothing more.”

“Whoa, (Y/N) are you okay!” Nero exclaimed.

It was then you noticed that your dam had burst and the tears were freely falling down your cheeks. You stood there shaking with quiet sobs as you lowered your head and brought your hands to your face to cover your reddened eyes. You panted and hiccupped behind your hands until you felt another pair, warm and gentle wrap around your wrists, gingerly coaxing you to reveal your face. You sniffled as you met Kyrie’s worried amber eyes.

“We’re so sorry. We won’t bring it up again, I promise. Please don’t cry,” she begged.

“It’s n-not…t-that,” you sputtered, “I pro-omise…”

They were both silent as Kyrie still held your shaky hands in her own while Nero stepped aside to grab something to dry your tears with. Kyrie quietly shushed you encouraging you to calm down so you could speak clearly. You began to focus on your breathing, slow quivering breaths in and out in a broken rhythm.

You couldn’t believe it. After so long. So many years of wanting and pushing your feelings down for their sake. So many years of loneliness holding out for this exact moment, no matter how impossible it previously seemed. So long just wanting to be held by them, touched, kissed, and loved by them the way they do each other. This was really happening.

Soon Nero returned with a bundle of tissues, handing them to you without a word but a very concerned face. It was still a few more minutes to calm yourself before you could speak.

“You…” you started dabbing your eyes as you went, “You have no idea how long… how long I’ve felt the same way. I just didn’t want to say anything because… because I didn’t want to ruin what we had. I… I didn’t want to just wedge myself in and risk ruining everything… so I k-kept quiet about how I felt.”

You sighed deeply as you calmed down more and more.

“I always had a feeling. I didn’t ask because… I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or scare you off. So, I just always teased you about being in love with me,” he chuckled, “I was too scared to come out with it myself. So, I just hoped you would do it for me.”

Kyrie, still standing very close to you, reached out her hand, softly rubbing your shoulder to help calm you faster. She smiled sweetly at you, that same smile you had see so many times and locked away in your inner vault to cherish when she wasn’t around, like the selfish little love gremlin you were.

“So,” she began, “What do you think? You don’t have to answer right away if you don’t want to.”

You smiled at her, eyes still red and puffy but so much happier than you were before. You took Kyrie’s hands into yours Interlocking your fingers with her, sighing with the warmth of her skin.

“I want to, I really do. So yes… if you’ll have me.”

Both of them smiled at you, Kyrie bouncing with excitement as you wiped away the last of your tears. Nero came forward, wrapping his strong arms around both of you. You buried your face in his shoulder, inhaling his comforting scent before pulling away from him, hand still locked in Kyrie’s. You looked to her, and saw the rosy blush spreading over her freckled cheeks.

She looked away from you bashfully before asking, “(Y/N), may I kiss you?”

You blinked wide eyed at her and felt your own cheeks heat up again, this time not from crying. You meekly nodded and stood still as she leaned in, pressing her lips to yours. They were the softest thing you had ever felt like rose petals that had been sitting on a sunny windowsill in summer. Lips slightly parted so they would fit perfectly with hers you felt the heat radiating off her skin. In the end it was chaste, she pulled away with a quiet smack of your parting. You had little experience with kissing but this one sent sparks through your whole body you had never felt before.

You were both silent after the fact, sparing each other bashful glances until Nero stepped forward, scratching at his nose in embarrassment like he’s one to do. He was uncharacteristically quiet but very characteristically shy as he placed a light hand on your shoulder. He leaned in slowly, silently asking for permission to join in. You granted it without a word, only closing the distance between you.

His lips weren’t as full or soft as Kyrie’s, but they were still softer than you had expected. You took a breath through your nose as your lips began to work against his. It felt so right, still riding the high after kissing Kyrie now Nero, your head was spinning in all directions.

Nero was the one to pull away first, and for a brief moment you followed him, wanting more. But you stopped, you couldn’t be so greedy. Your skin tingled as Nero let his hand fall form it, his calloused fingertips lingering on your skin as he went. You could feel the goosebumps rising in the exact patterns as his touch.

“It’s getting late,” Nero said, his voice huskier than it was before, “We don’t have to do anything more tonight.”

“You’re right,” you said, your arm returning to their position securely across your chest, “I-I think that we should talk about this more later.”

“Do you want to spend the night?” Kyrie asked, “You still have some things here.”

It wasn’t uncommon for you to spend the night at their place when the night got away from you and it was too late and too much of a hassle to walk home. So naturally after some time you had accumulated a small wardrobe that you just left here for such an occasion. And sweetest Kyrie, had them all clean folded in a canvas box neatly tucked away in the linen closet.

“Thank you I would but, I think maybe it would be best if I went home for tonight, process everything.”

There’s no way you would be able to sleep tonight if you were here, especially after all of this. Your mind was still racing with adrenaline, excitement, and anxiety. Those kisses gave you enough dopamine to last you a long while, you’ll still be feeling their lips on yours when you’re trying to sleep tonight.

“I understand,” Kyrie said with a content smile, “But please come over for breakfast tomorrow so we can talk things over more.”

“I will that sounds great,” you agreed, “It is getting late if I leave now it shouldn’t take me too long.”

“I’ll walk you home,” Nero offered. Ever the gentleman as he led you to the door, you both sparing a quick goodnight to Kyrie.

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tsuzuruchipalace · 4 years

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rating mankai company based on character design

Note: I will take into account hair, color scheme, sprite poses, mostly outfits that are not from plays or scouts, and memorability. This is half an objective view and half my personal opinion.

Disclaimer: I curse a lot for comedic effort. I am mean because I am funny. No, you cannot disagree.

Spring 🌸

sakuya: you get what you see. a literal spring babey. his hair and color scheme’s a little generic, but he’s mankai’s poster boy, so that’s understandable. speaking of generic, his main pose is just this emoji 🧍‍♂️ his outfits tend to be kinda basic, but any outfit with a mostly pink top gets him bonus points. 6/10

masumi: okay his hair is elite. probably one of the most memorable character design aspects among the cast. his mole and eyes also make him very pretty. love my boy’s dark color scheme. unfortunately, points must be docked for baiting us with the emo fit, then as the story progresses, he starts dressing like the trust fund kid he is smh. 9/10

tsuzuru: i love you tsuzu but. my mans is so basic. if he didn’t have such a great personality, he’d be as bland as untoasted white bread. the saya of a3. his best design aspect is the fact that he doesn’t dye his roots. his outfits look comfy, but not necessarily eye-catching. 4/10

itaru: everyone who starts a3! with no knowledge of these characters has one (1) thought about itaru. sec sea man. so obviously there’s something appealing/good about his character design. i think part of the appeal is his fuck-all demeanor. obviously, his eyes and hairstyle are attractive, but the way the artists draw him gives him an air of not caring, which is also attractive in a way. his dyed tips are also nice. he looks kinda lame when he dresses professionally, but his casual outfits hit. especially the ones with light pink. 8/10

citron: although i’m not a big fan of the “character is foreign and therefore must talk and dress different and be funny” trope in these types of media, his fashion does make him stand out from the other characters who tend to have more basic clothes. citron’s summer, travel, and autumn outfits SLAP and anyone who says otherwise has bad taste. his hair and eyes are interesting, but his overall color scheme can be a bit repetitive. 7/10

chikage: i hate this guy’s fucking bowlcut. fucking salad bowl lookin ass. every outfit is the same turtleneck and sneakers in two alternate colors. his outfits are so plain. only thing i like is his casual outfit glasses. HOWEVER. that’s the point. he’s supposed to look boring and blend in because he’s a spy. it’s a smart design, i just don’t like it so im docking points. stay mad about it. 5/10

Summer ☀️

tenma: im yawning. you think tsuzu was boring? this guy has orange hair and i still find his design boring. that’s how you know he’s basic. he’s got generic messy shounen protag hair. he could be from any property. if i drew fanart of him, people would ask where he’s from. he either dresses like your slightly homophobic frat boy classmate or a grandfather who gets his shit stolen by the asshole kids next door. 2/10

yuki: he has the r a n g e. all of yuki’s casual outfits hit. they’re all different, but cute in their own way. to no one’s surprise, one of the best styled characters. though i like his general color scheme, i’m personally not the biggest fan of his hairstyle. it’s okay, but a little plain at times. but i think it suits him well. 7/10

muku: i love him. muku’s design is what i love about this game. you see him, and you immediately know what his character archtype is supposed to be. he’s the soft, cute boy. and if this was a mediocre series, that’d be all muku is. but since this is a3, he’s so much more than that. he’s smart, passionate, sensitive to others’ feelings, and protective. a3 does a great job designing characters that look exactly like their archtype, but having a much more developed personality than that. getting back to the actual subject at hand, i love his hairstyle and color, as well as his outfits. you can never go wrong with light pink hair. i may be biased but fuck you. 10/10

misumi: another great memorable design. his eye shape and hair style are really unique. his outfits also elevate his design. street fashion is always a plus for me. though sumi’s design is special in the world of a3! where most of the characters are just. guys. regular lookin dudes. i think that outside of the game, his design would not be as unique. 8/10

kazunari: personally, im a fan. maybe it’s cause i have an affinity for blonde anime boys. but his hairstyle is pretty unique and his trendy looks set him apart from most characters, even outside this game. and he has a pretty lovable expression in his sprites. his fatal flaw is that his fits are either a hit or miss. they’re either really cute or wtf. at least he’s memorable. 8/10

kumon: i love that he reminds me of an owl. his hair and eyes are very cute and his color scheme is great. and i think they did a great job making him look related to juza, but still very much his own character. but he dresses like your classmate from middle school that looks like a nike-sponsored highlighter. yeah, he’s the sporty one, and i like the windbreakers but... i cannot excuse his summer fit. also, i find his design a little tame compared to some of the other characters in the game. 6/10

Autumn 🍂

banri: i hate his hair. i hate it so much. i know in canon it’s nice and he takes good care of it, but it looks so fucking greasy. the style makes him look so greasy and it makes me mad. he looks like an asshole. i mean, he is, so it fits. if this dumb bitch changed his hair more often, i’d like his design so much more. you saw this coming; his love for cheetah print is fucking repulsive. BUT, maybe unpopular opinion, minus the animal print, his sense of fashion is not bad. why do yall clown on it. if the fit is fresh, the fit is fresh. anyway, he looks like an ass, but objectively his design is kinda eh. 5/10

juza: im sorry im DEADLY fucking biased when it comes to juza, but he’s so handsome. his hair is a such a rich, pretty shade of purple and his eyes are so mesmerizing. his hairstyle is so attractive. his face is so pretty. yeah his design isn’t crazy unique, but the simplicity just works. im so sorry im this man’s whore i didn’t choose this life... but i can stop being a simp for one second to say that he has a boring fashion sense. i mean it’s kinda hot how simple his outfits are but his travel fit is good-- wait a minute i just remembered the fucking sandals. docking one point. 9/10

taichi: okay shut the fuck up i LOVE taichi’s design. so eye-catching and fun. as i’ve said i love street fashion, and taichi’s lil e-boy fits are right up my alley. that shade of bright red goes so well with his fashion sense, making a really cohesive design. with his main outfit, you can tell he purposely dresses like that to be trendy and it’s so smart. 10/10

omi: im sorry omi stans but his design is kinda,, boring. i legit had such a hard time identifying him when i first got into this game. the scar saves it a bit. but... only a bit. he’s just got. hair. and a dad outfit. i mean his tits are huge, but i don’t think i can call that a character design aspect. kinda forgettable design. i don’t dislike it though, so he ranks higher than tenma did. 3/10

sakyo: im not sure why but i really like sakyo’s design?? the contrast of his light hair and his dark clothes is nice. also, megane rights. even when i thought he was an npc during my first playthrough, i really dug his design and thought he was memorable. i actually cannot pinpoint a reason why. i wish i had more constructive things to say... but upon thinking about it, he has a karen haircut, which kinda dampers my thoughts on his design. i like his moles, but i honestly did not notice them until the game pointed them out. 7/10

azami: azami has a damn good design. i don’t think anyone can deny that. the long hair, the contrast of black hair and bright blue eyes, his eye shape. all very eye-catching design aspects. and the street fashion style strikes again. the color scheme matches well with everything. this review is lame, but there’s really only good things i can say about his design so. 10/10

Winter ❄️

tsumugi: it’s so late and im so tired of looking at these sprites. anyway, tsumugi’s design is okay. i think his color scheme’s a bit limited and his outfits are a bit meh. he has a more respectable bowlcut than chikage, but it’s still a bowlcut and it’s still boring. i think the best part of his design is his eyes, they’re very soft and kind. but other than that, tsumugi looks pretty basic. 5/10

tasuku: tbh, i didn’t even realize that the godza member tasuku was the same character as the winter troupe guy in the game’s opening until the middle of episode 3... yeah. im slow. ooooooor... tasuku has the worst fucking design in the game. yeah i said it. come at me, but tasuku’s design fucking sucks. i literally thought he was a minor character until they forced me to realize he wasn’t. his fashion sense is... questionable at best. i look at that man’s hair and think he doesn’t shampoo. he looks so bland i could dry up from looking at him. im sorry but his tits do not make up for the sheer fucking snorefest of his character design. he’s so boring i won’t elaborate anymore. 1/10

hisoka: ya get what ya see part 2. i like that i can tell he’s the sleepy and mysterious character just by his design, but honestly, that’s a character trope im generally not a big fan of. so i wasn’t thrilled by hisoka’s design at first. but it’s effective. i like the hairstyle with the white hair, but i’m not too fond of his color scheme. his outfits look comfy and soft though. it makes sense, but it’s nothing too memorable if you compare him to characters outside the game. 5/10.

homare: ah, now this is a memorable character design. his hairstyle annoyed me in the beginning, but now i love it. it’s so unique and fun. and i like the purple. i also like his outfits. very classy. but honestly, most of his charisma lies in his face. i think that the pure eccentricity of the hairstyle is enough to put him in the top tier without considering any other element. you really could not find this design in any other media. fuck it. i don’t need to consider anything else. 9/10

azuma: i’ll be honest. im not a fan of long-haired anime men. especially the pretty, flirty types. i don’t know, i just don’t vibe with them. originally, i didn’t like azuma’s design, but now i do. i don’t know how, but i think it’s because azuma is just that powerful. his ponytail makes it more bearable for me and i like the way his bangs frame his face. he just has pretty eyes and face. unfortunately his color scheme is a little too repetitive for me and his casual outfits are a little boring. 6/10

guy: maybe it’s because he looks dead inside, but i love him. i don’t even know this character that well yet, but i think his deadass expression is great. the darker under-eyeline sets him apart from the other characters and i love how he dresses. i think his hair is kinda eh. i personally like it, but objectively, it’s meh. it’s a solid design, but ngl it’s nothing special when i really think about it. 6/10

#for legal reasons this is a joke #this entire post should be underlined with a /lh #i love them all very much im sorry for being mean #except for chikage he deserves it #long post #a3!#a3! act! addict! actors!#A3! Actor Training Game #mod tsuzu talks

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listentothelittlebird · 4 years

Text

TW: dissociative episode

This was a whole scrapped oneshot, mostly because I couldn’t fit it in properly... I misread something on a wikipedia page and somehow ended up with “Jason revisited Ethiopia sometime during the Red Hood and the Outlaws, and had major PTSD”. I’m fairly sure I was sleep deprived at the time... (I’m honestly happy with how this one turned out, but it was just out-of-place with the rest of the other oneshots)

This is a “deleted scene” from my series on ao3, Code Bat!

It was a quiet, peaceful night, until the comms crackled to life.

“N,” Oracle called, “RH entered Gotham an hour ago. The new Super he befriended brought him in, but he hasn’t moved from his location since. Can you go check on him?”

Nightwing frowned. Jason was in town?

He was happy to have a chance to see his Little Wing, of course, but this was an unplanned visit. Usually he would at least radio in ahead, and dramatically announce his return by searching for them during patrol time.

Something was wrong.

“R and I are still dealing with the drug ring,” Batman grunted, “We’ll be with you as soon as we can.”

It seemed even the Bat himself was getting worried.

“I’m turning in for the night. BG’s headed towards RH right now. Let me know how he is, alright?” Spoiler paused, before adding, “I can pull an extra patrol or two, if he needs you guys for company. I’m not an official fam’ member, but I’m more than ready to help.”

Nightwing would have hugged Spoiler if she was standing next to him.

Batgirl was already at the rooftop when Nightwing arrived. She was crouched directly in front of Jason - in his Red Hood outfit, skull-like helmet still on his head - and staring. Nightwing had learnt to read Cass’ body language, and right now she was practically screaming concern. She straightened when Nightwing touched down.

“Unresponsive,” she signed, “Alive, but not there. Like the victims we saw last week.”

Nightwing sighed, a rush of air escaping his chest. It was relief mixed in with new pain, because something had happened to his brother for him to shut down. Something had triggered this.

“RH is dissociating,” Nightwing reported to the comms, “BG says he’s unresponsive. B, once you and R are done, get the Batmobile here.”

“We’re on our way,” came Robin’s tight response, crisp and serious but betraying the slightest of quivers.

In the meantime, Nightwing busied himself with removing Jason’s helmet. His face was blank, devoid of his usual snarky grin or unimpressed eye-roll. His chest was rising and falling in slow, mechanical breaths.

“We’ll take care of you, Little Wing,” Nightwing laid a hand gently on his brother’s shoulder, smiling warmly, “Take all the time you need, okay? We’ll be here.”

There was not so much as a twitch to acknowledge his words. Dick’s gut clenched tighter, even having expected the lack of response.

Batgirl had drifted away, standing several steps back. At Nightwing’s questioning glance, she murmured haltingly, “Scary.” She raised her hands to elaborate.

“No body messages. Nothing. Cannot tell what he is thinking, or if he is thinking. I’m scared for him. With other victims, it’s bad. With family...” the next motion was not proper sign language - she made a heart with her hands, then split it.

It hurt to see family like this.

Nightwing gave a sad, quiet smile in response, and the way he turned back to eye Jason was enough to convey his agreement.

Jason came back to himself slowly.

He was never truly gone, not quite. Not for a while, he thinks.

He’s… not sure about much. Just that he had been able to tell Artemis and Bizarro that he was going to pull a few strings in Gotham to get them a permanent base.

He remembered fumbling out an address for a safe house that he had, which would be able to last his two teammates for more than a week. He remembered Biz dropping him off in Gotham. He remembered sitting down on the filthy rooftop.

He thinks Batgirl came, then Nightwing. He thinks they helped him into the Batmobile, and he thinks he saw Batman and Robin.

He… can’t quite recall what happened next. It was like his memories were grinded to a pulp and then drained of substance, leaving behind the crusts of barely-coherent scenes. Flashes of what had happened.

He was in the Batcave, then he was being walked up the stairs to the Manor, one large arm wrapped around his shoulders, one large hand gripping firmly onto his elbow.

There was the rustling of old paperbacks, distant and distorted, like hearing through water.

There was Bruce, blue eyes focused on him, gazing at him and murmuring something soft.

“...here for you. You’re safe, Jaylad.”

He felt a sliver of pressure on his face.

Jason blinked. His hand rose to the spot, to where the mildest of pressures were, a calloused hand cupped against his cheek. He blinked two, three times, Bruce’s face morphing into the most genuine of smiles, even as the smell of the library and faint tightness of hunger greeted him.

“B?” Jason croaked, his voice hoarse from something more than dryness. Bruce was still quick to supply him a cup of water. The hand had yet to leave his cheek. Jason, still thrown off and trying to piece together his scattered mind, leaned into the hand even as he downed the glass.

There was a reason his throat felt scratchy. He had been screaming. Screaming at…

By the time Bruce had plucked his empty glass from his hand and set it down, Jason had jolted violently, as the realisation of how he got here, on exactly why he had returned back to Gotham, hit him like a train.

Ethiopia. The rebuilt warehouse. The living nightmare of his latest Outlaws mission.

“B?” Jason’s voice was desperate now. Logically, he knew Bruce was right there. Trying to convince his tortured mind though, as it finally came to terms with what had happened, was not as simple.

“Dad? Dad…” Jason’s hands reached blindly for Bruce’s arms, scrambling to tighten clenched fists into the fabric of the man’s sweater. Bruce pulled Jason into his chest.

While Jason tried and failed to quell his breakdown, Bruce had maneuvered himself back onto the couch, Jason sat half in his lap and half on the couch. Jason’s arms, tight around his father’s shoulders, loosened as he let out a shaky gasp.

“We - we had a mission,” Jason rambled before he could stop himself, “Artemis was looking for something, and we were helping her look, and-“

“Jay,” Bruce cut in gently, “Don’t force yourself. Please, son.”

Jason, his forehead pressed to Bruce’s shoulder, shook his head even as he barreled on. He had to get this out before his walls went up again, before it became too blissfully peaceful to even broach the subject.

“I- fuck. We went to Ethiopia,” Jason gave a hollow laugh, even as Bruce sucked in a sharp breath of air, “It was fucking hell, B. Pretty sure they were just doing the generic torture shit on me, but they didn’t even need to do anything, really. The location was enough to…to-“ Jason’s voice cracked. There was something wet leaking out of his eyes.

“It looked exactly the same, B. I checked after - it was the same place. It was-“ Jason’s voice gave out for real, then.

Bruce pulled him tighter, holding his son close as he cried himself dry. Bruce was just glad that Jason had been able to come back to Gotham, that his son was here for him to comfort - was willing to accept that comfort from him still, even after everything that had happened.

“You’re here,” Bruce hushes, when Jason’s sobs had died down to sniffles. He gave the boy - he would forever be a boy in his eyes - a squeeze around his broad shoulders. “You’re here.”

Jason sniffed again, and squeezed back, tight and desperate.

Later, Alfred would enter, guided by his butler senses to bring a meal for Jason. Later, his siblings would check in on him, and Dick would pile everyone into the living room with a movie marathon and a sleepover. Later, Jason would figure out a permanent base of operations for the Outlaws.

For now, it was just a father holding his son, both undeniably grateful to be alive.

Jason led Biz and Artemis to an underground bunker at the outskirts of Metropolis. They were right under Superman’s nose, which was both exhilarating and concerning.

He did not fancy meeting any one of Bruce’s colleagues.

On the other hand, if Superman did stumble upon them someday soon, Bizarro would finally get to meet someone like him. Well, someone who might see him as family, at least. Jason had heard from Tim that Superman was a big-hearted family man that had taken in Kon-El the moment he had trusted the clone.

He hoped Superman would take Bizarro in. The big guy deserved someone else besides him and Artemis.

Speaking of…

“Say, since we’re gonna be working with each other a lot more from now on, can I get insurance that you won’t take a swing at Wonder Woman while I’m in the collateral damage zone?”

Artemis glared at him, but Jason had weathered Bat-glares, and this was nothing compared to the man. His helmet was off, so she could see his smirk, his red domino stretching as he raised an eyebrow.

“I’d have thought you’d be on better terms with the lady. I mean, she’d gladly offer you any support you need,” Jason pointed out.

Artemis huffed, “Themyscira should have done more to aid my tribe. They still have yet to do more to aid my tribe. As Diana is a representative of her people, my grudge is against her tribe, and not her personally. Truthfully, Diana saved my life, and I am grateful for that.”

Jason hummed contemplatively. “Well, you should be a bridge between the two tribes,” Jason thought aloud, “Just saying, you basically became your tribe’s champion by getting back the Bow of Ra. If anyone could get them more aid, it’d be you.”

He could tell that the Amazonian needed time to think on his words, so instead of continuing. Jason splayed his arms, “Besides, sweet-talking gets you places!”

It was implied that such was how he had gotten their base, but the circumstances were probably far from what Artemis assumed. All Jason had needed to do was talk over conversations during dinner and Bruce was showing him possible locations even before patrol rotations had begun.

Artemis latched onto the new topic, regarding their new base with a satisfied tilt to her head, “What were those connections that you managed to find? Gotham is one place in Man’s World that I have yet to understand.”

“Eh, you learn to deal with the city’s fuckery. Like I said, I just had some old strings that I could pull to get us here,” Jason shrugged, and paused for a moment. Everything had been moving a mile and minute, from when Jason had first met Artemis to when they and Bizarro became a team.

He had neglected to tell them his name. Not that Bizarro needed his name, since he even called Artemis Red Her, but Artemis herself had always referred to Jason as Red Hood or Red.

“Jay.”

At Artemis’ questioning glance, Jason huffed, “It’s my name, I guess. Close enough.”

It was the name the Titans, Roy and Kori, knew him by. Artemis and Bizarro were shaping up to be his second round of Outlaws, and he wanted them to have his trust, too.

There was a weighty glint in Artemis’ eyes. “It is an honour to work with you, Jay,” she stated solemnly.

Jason cracked a grin, “Aw, c’mon, don’t go all mushy on me. Let’s go get Biz before he ransacks the whole pantry.”

He turned to head in Bizarro’s direction, his loud rummaging making Jason glad he had chosen to put them significantly low underground. Artemis trailed behind with a warm smile.

#probably not accurate to actual dissociation #there's an extra scene after the angst #Batfam #Jason Todd #Bruce Wayne #Dick Grayson #Cassandra Cain #Tim Drake #Code Bat #artemis of bana mighdall #Angst #Comfort #fanfic #straight from the trash doc

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detectivedreameater · 4 years

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Girls Just Wanna Win||Erin and Marley

TIMING: Current (pick a night, any night) PARTIES: @corpse--diem and @detectivedreameater SUMMARY: Just Fun. Erin is good at giving directions, Marley is good a solving puzzles. Somewhere along the way, a trust is forged.

Marley’s gift was also her curse. Being able to know people after just one conversation often led to strange interactions with people, who found her abrasive or off-putting. And, mostly, she was okay with that. In the instance of Erin, she’d been more than sure that she did not like her after their first meeting, and for some reason, that had left a sour taste in Marley’s mouth. But then they’d kept talking, either out of necessity or something else, and now Marley found that she quite enjoyed Erin’s company, as much as she might have been loath to admit it outloud. Either way, her curse had turned back into a gift for this occasion. Erin had agreed to let Marley show her a good time, and for the first time in Marley’s life, that meant not sleeping with her. But she had a good idea of what someone like Erin might like. She’d already figured out her morbid fascination, considering she was a funeral director who had a dry sense of humor, and the place she had picked out for them to go was a place Marley had enjoyed going several times before, if only for the thrill. When she arrived at Erin’s, dressed no nicer than usual save for the red leather jacket instead of black, she knocked. “Hey, it’s me! No mimes here! Just you’re really cool and hot--” a pause, “-- cohort.”

Dress comfortable, Marley had told her. Whatever they were doing, Erin had a feeling that Marley was going to make her work for this good time she’d been promised. But she was excited? Not knowing exactly what was going down only made it better, and her mind had gone down a thousand different avenues trying to guess what kind of thing Marley would be into. She didn’t know the woman well enough to land on any one idea. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst, right? She scratched the back of Betty’s neck as she sat by the window sill, anxious and excited like a little kid for her friend to arrive when the knock finally came. “Wish me luck?” She cooed, smiling before she gave her one last pet to the top of her head, then bounded for the door. “We’re cool, hot cohorts now, huh?” Erin grinned at her greeting and stepped out of the house, locking it behind her. “If we could not mention mimes like, ever again, that’d be awesome. Otherwise I’ll have to bump you back down to ‘colleague’.” She took note of her simple attire, not too dissimilar to what Erin wore. Red, loose tee, jeans, and boots. Minus the cool red jacket. “Have I dressed to your standards for the evening, m’lady?” She smirked, holding her arms out and did a little spin just to be obnoxious.

“Well, now we’re not, not since you said it like that,” Marley deadpanned, rolling her eyes. She watched Erin do her annoying spin, groaning all the while. “You’re so annoying,” she said, but there was a smirk on her face, curling up her lips. “You’re fine. C’mon, let’s go, it’s gonna get dark soon.” She ushered Erin out of her house and over to her car, starting it up. She was actually pretty excited for what she had planned tonight, and if Erin was the kind of person she thought she was, then hopefully she would enjoy it, too. There was almost something like nerves-- except that Marley didn’t get nervous-- as she turned the car on and looked over at Erin. “It’s a bit of a ride, but just...trust me, okay? And don’t worry, there’s no mimes.”

Erin rolled her eyes right back at Marley, grinning through her snarky comment. “Oh, you like it,” she quipped before she was quickly escorted to the car, like Marley assumed she was going to pull anymore shenanigans or or prolong this further. As if. She’d been waiting days to see what this damn surprise was. Her interest piqued back into focus as they pulled out onto the road, though she couldn’t stop the cringe in her face. “For the love of God, you have got to stop bringing up the mimes. It stopped being funny ages ago,” she groaned, narrowing her eyes at her, before letting the linger back towards the road. Sighed softly as she settled into the seat, fingers drumming against the top of the door. Trust. Funny word to throw between them. She liked Marley, and there was a certain amount of trust they had to share if their partnership was going to work. But she also had a feeling Marley would sell her out to save herself in a heartbeat. She expected it, and Erin would do the same. “Well--if you’re driving me out to the middle of nowhere to kill me, it would’ve been nice if you told me to to dress well instead of comfortably,” she said, tossing a smirk at her. “When they find the body, I would’ve appreciated being dressed for the occasion.”

“Oh trust me,” Marley said with a dismissive wave, “if I was gonna kill you, I wouldn’t bother driving you way out of town for it. Too much evidence left that way.” She gave Erin a look, before starting the drive. The place was just a ways out of town, and while there was a similar place in town, Marley preferred this one for the unique spin it took and the special location. When they pulled up, finally, the place was nearly empty, save for a few other cars. Marley parked and turned to look at Erin. “Hope you brought your big girl britches,” she grinned, before getting out of the car and heading to what looked like an abandoned trailer out in the middle of this field. But the closer they got, the more it came into view, especially for Marley, someone with perfect night vision. A town, sprawled out, and old. Buildings still made of wood and brick, older than most standing buildings. A literal ghost town, blocked in by an iron gate with large, sprawling letters built in. “Welcome to Ghost Town, USA. On today’s tour-- the escape room special.” Grinning from ear to ear, trying to remember the last time she’d been this excited for something that wasn’t sex.

Erin nodded her head as if that made perfect sense. “Oh, well when you put it that way--” she shrugged nonchalantly. The drive was as long as Marley had promised, but went quickly. They didn’t talk much outside of the easy back and forth banter that usually filled the space between them. Funny how that worked itself out, considering the literal nightmare Marley thrust on her the first night they’d met. Sometimes still made her uneasy when she remembered what lay behind those sunglasses. But for as much as that had fucked her up, Marley had stepped in when she’d needed her on more than one occasion. Even now, here she was, going out of her way to make good on a promise to show Erin a good time. “Holy fuck,” Erin laughed, following in disbelief behind her. “Okay. Yep. This is cool. You win this one,” she admitted freely, eyes glued to the old abandoned buildings. If Marley had just brought her to explore an old abandoned town like this even without the added excitement, she would have been all over it. “This is a team thing, right? You and me versus the town? Because if you, a detective, came here to embarrass me--” she shrugged, tilted her head, a big grin still on her face. “Honestly, I’d still love it, but--dick move, Stryder. Dick move.”

Marley grinned when she saw the look on Erin’s face, she always liked being right. “Don’t worry,” she said, coming back over to her and hurrying her along towards the front gates, “it’s a team thing. We’re on the same side here, Erin, don’t you know that?” She pushed the gate open, greeted the cashier and showed them the reservation she had placed. She handed them two tickets and pointed them to the closest building, labeled ‘START/GIFT SHOP’. The sun was still trickling down below the horizon as they approached, but Marley could already feel nighttime taking its grip on her, eyes beginning to glow behind her frames. “Guess we gotta get the spiel first,” she said, opening the door, “after you.”

Erin only smirked at Marley in return before she was being shoved in the direction of the first building that’d get them started. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever actually done one of these before,” she realized once they were in the dusty building. They were all the rage for a few years, and she’d heard enough about them from others to get the general gist. Now wasn’t the time to make herself look even more lame, explaining that she hadn’t done it because she’d have needed a willing partner. The door shut behind them, effectively sealing them into the mostly dark room with the group of others all participating. They slipped into the back as the spiel began. She reached into her pocket, giving Marley a discreet nudge. “Brought this in case your surprise sucked,” she whispered, handing the small flask off to the other woman. She shrugged, tilting her head towards Marley as she leaned in a little closer, eyes still up front. “Cheers, partner,” she smirked, casting a quick glance her way, then back up front.

Marley had heard the instructions before, something about keys and finding locks and the first team to make their way out of town won, yadda yadda. The nudge from Erin got her attention, though, and she took the flask gratefully. “I knew there was a reason I liked you,” she said back, taking a nice, long sip before handing it back. Everyone else was either milling around or paying a little too much attention to the man giving them instructions and handing out keys. Each team started at a different building, and when he got around to them, he handed them the jail key. Once he was out of earshot, Marley held it up to Erin. “Irony at its finest,” she grinned, before reaching for the flask again. “We’re gonna cream all of them.”

When the coast was clear, and the instructor’s back was turned, Erin took a quick swig from the flask herself. Gave Marley a whole eye roll at the jail key joke. Her hand shot up, snatching at the keys dangling in front of her. “At least let me pretend here? Just one night?” She grinned, passing the flask off in exchange. But they were so gonna cream these people. Half of them were teenagers and the other half was split between either what she presumed to be chaperones or bored middle-aged friends and the very loud, very drunk bunch not too much younger than they were. The game began finally and, a shock to the entire room, it was the drunk rowdy bunch that figured out the first puzzle that let them into another portion of the town. “I thought you were supposed to be good at this!” Erin teased as she heard them hoop and holler, giving Marley a gentle smack on the arm. “This is incredibly embarrassing for you, I hope you know.”

“Fine, fine,” Marley said, happily exchanging the key for the flask while they waited for their instructions to get started. She doddle along behind Erin for the first few minutes, sipping on the flask and watching her go about, taking in the information on how she deduced these sorts of situations. It told a lot about a person, how they handled things like this. And although Erin wasn’t the quickest to wit-- the clue was in the locker-- her methodical deductions and ability to analyze made Marley pleased enough. She held the flask out when the other group of drunken newly 30-year-olds howled their victory at finding the first clue first. “Well, I wanna make it fun,” she said, “it’s not easy if I just beat everyone right away.” She went over to the locker, jangled it a bit, and produced the clue. “Shall we move on?”

Erin was genuinely stumped when Marley pulled the next clue from the locker. “What the fuck,” she huffed quietly, hands on her hips. She was kind of close to getting there. Just not quick enough. “Alright, show-off, let’s go,” she grumbled, hiding a smirk as they bound to the next part of the game. The competitive side of her was waking up. “You know what’s fun? Like, really fun?” She asked as they analyzed their clue in accordance to the new area. “Winning,” she answered before Marley could answer. “More specifically, crushing them.” She was looking directly at Marley, but the boisterous ruckus behind them left little for interpretation. “And if that means I’m just here to assist your big, beautiful brain along the way to make that happen? That’s what I’ll do. I have no problem delegating.” Her grin widened and she held her hand out like they were negotiating new terms in a contract. “Whaddya say, partner?”

Marley couldn’t help but chuckle. “C’mon, the clue literally spelled it out,” she said, pointing at it. “And I mean literally.” The first letter of each sentence spelled it out. Shaking her head, she moved on, following Erin. She met her gaze evenly, though her eyes hid behind her glasses. She paused, as if mulling over the idea, before taking Erin’s hand and grinning. “Deal,” she agreed, “partner.” Took the next clue out and unfolded it. It was a map to the next clue, but coded in a not so simple way. The drunk crew was having a riot with it, flipping it upside and turning it every which way, but Marley knew better. “You got a lighter?” she asked, pulling Erin away from everyone else into a quiet alley, where they wouldn’t be spotted.

Erin rolled her eyes at the jab, waving her off. “I’m rusty, I guess. I didn’t do the crosswords this morning.” But she couldn’t deny she felt better now that there was a something close to a game plan after that handshake. She followed behind her and into the alley. “Jesus, they don’t screw around here, do they?” She said as she dug through her pockets. In the back of her wallet was an old pair of matches from the last actual nonmoose-themed restaurant she’d visited. But she knew exactly what Marley was getting at. Taking a quick glance out of the alley, satisfied when she saw the rest of the group only just joining Club Drunk in their wild confusion, she ducked back in just as quickly. Flicked the match as Marley held it, and suddenly the map’s directions were clear as day. “Oh!” She whispered excitedly. “We’ve gotta pretend like we don’t know where we’re going or they’re going to piggyback off our success. Just act confused,” she warned with a nod. “I don’t think this is right,” Erin said just loud enough for the group behind them to hear, making a show of shrugging her shoulders and pointing in the opposite direction. Okay, this was a lot of fun. She smirked slyly over at Marley and lowered her voice. “The count of three, we make a run for it?”

Perhaps Erin was having a little too much fun with all this. Not that Marley entirely minded. It was better than the opposite. Marley wasn’t even aware she’d feared that, but the small drop in her stomach made her realize she was glad Erin wasn’t grumping her way through something Marley thoroughly enjoyed doing. As they exited the alley, Marley held the map upside down, pretending to try and follow it to a location. Rolled her eyes at Erin’s pretend attempt to throw them off before turning to look over at her. “If we run, we’ll alert them, we just gotta...play it cool,” she said, nudging her, but decided to take off at a faster pace anyway. Everyone else was too caught up in their own arguments of deductive methods to notice the two women wander off. If Marley had been alone she could’ve easily just gone invisible, but maybe sneaking the human way was more fun, with more chance of getting caught. When they reached the location-- a quieter place, away from the dim lighting back behind the town hall-- they found two shovels. “Guess we gotta dig.”

“Damn it, Marley, I said on thr—“ Erin cursed as Marley took off ahead of her anyway. They were around the corner before anyone saw, thankfully. Catching her breath, she just shot Marley another look, but shrugged. “Before you start, please spare me the funeral director digging holes joke I know you’re about to make,” she glared at her, picking up a shovel. Her expertise did lend itself here though. Even in the dark, she could spot the surprisingly well camouflaged loose dirt. The dirt made a sharp crunch as the spade sunk in. “Is this like, Extreme Escape Room-ing or something?” She huffed, unearthing the hole bit by bit. “I don’t remember signing a wager in case I actually do die out here,” she grinned, another tease. Footsteps and chatter filled the alley they’d left and Erin dug as fast as her arms would allow. Thunk. Metal hit metal. One more good go and the top of a box came into view. The herd was closing in on them. “Shit—“ she panicked, laughing hard all the while they pulled it loose. “Let’s open it over there!” She pointed to the other side of the building and made a run for it. Paused at the other shovels lined for the rest of the group. “Oh, wait,” she grinned deviously. The ones she didn’t have time to toss out into the grass she simply knocked over, before hauling ass away. “Go!”

Marley let out a boisterous laugh. She couldn’t help it. “It’s an escape adventure, Erin, c’mon,” she said, grabbing a shovel to help dig. “Didn’t you read the sign?” She found the dirt patch quickly and helped Erin start digging in, scoop after scoop of dirt coming up until they hit gold. Or, well, metal. The box was smaller than she’d expected, but that meant the next clue was something small. She raced after Erin, helping her take some of the shovels and chuck them away, laughing all the while. When they made it around the corner, her cheeks were flushed with exertion. The lights above them flickered. “You know,” she said, scooting away from the light, “this is White Crest we’re talking about. Sort of.” Though they were outside of city limits, this was still considered part of the town. “C’mon, open it, let’s see the next clue.”

The cool brick wall felt amazing against Erin’s back as they finally stopped. “Don’t jinx us,” she gave Marley a playful side eye and fidgeted with the box, trying to figure out how to get the damn thing open. Oh! She whipped out the key from earlier. The one end was far too large, probably for an actual door later on, but the other end dangled from the metal ring in a way that the small end fit in perfectly. Erin grinned proudly. “See, I’m not completely useless.” Inside was a single piece of paper with simple symbols scribbled on it, like a code, and two sets of flashlights. “I guess the scavenging isn’t over yet.” Her eyes narrowed and she pulled the contents out and ditched the box. “Alright Stryder,” she mumbled as her eyes scanned over what seemed to be a riddle or clue to their next destination. “Anytime you wanna whip out that big beautiful brain I was boasting about earlier would be great.”

“No, not completely,” Marley teased, before watching her figure out the key trick. Erin opened the box to the two flashlights and the small slips of paper. Symbols on them. Marley recognized them almost immediately. “They’re old symbols for the different buildings,” she said, taking the piece of paper. “Looks like instructions. It’s...a basement. The basement of…” she glanced around them. Which building matched this? “The apothecary!” She pointed. The building was the farthest away from them, and voices sounded from behind. “C’mon! I’ll race you?” She elbowed Erin but didn't wait for a countdown, taking off in the direction, running right by a few other slower going participants.

“Apothecary? How old is this town?” Erin narrowed her eyes at the building, then saw Marley race ahead after she elbowed her. “Hey!” She yelled as she booked it. “I’m on your team, here!” She was slowly but sure gaining on her lead. God, this felt good. She’d be hard pressed to remember the last time she was this stupid and carefree for even just a few hours. Not the evening she ever would have expected with the same woman she met with a body bag in tow the night they met. She slammed against the wall of the building in an effort to stop herself. “Tie!” She heaved a breath, cheeks flushed as she rested against it. “If I didn’t win, that was totally a tie.” When she caught her breath, she handed off the other flashlight, but then caught herself. “Wait, do you even need this? Or are you actually playing by the book here?” She nodded at her sunglasses. The drunkards were also gaining on their lead, she realized when she saw the group of them pointing towards the apothecary. No time to argue. She grabbed Marley’s arm and shoved her ahead. “You first.”

“Hey, if I could turn it off, I totally would,” Marley said, giving a small pout. She furrowed her brow before adjusting her glasses. “But I don’t think I can just turn off night vision, my eyes aren’t goggles.” Leaned against the building, panting a little. “I don’t do ties, you totally lost,” she grinned, before she was getting shoved inside. “Hey, hey, hands off the goods,” she swatted at Erin before heading inside, glancing around. The door was sure to be hidden, and she began feeling around the walls and shelves. This really was her element, and Marley would’ve been lying had she said she wasn’t glad to have found someone who could enjoy the same things she did. And Erin was easy because Erin knew. About her species, about her work, about, well, everything except her childhood, really. And Erin was still here, and Erin still called her when she needed someone. And maybe, just maybe, it felt a little nice to be needed. “Check the floor, it might be a hatch,” she pointed, as she rifled through a bookshelf, pushing the thought away. Nothing here, just a lot of dust and old books. The floors creaked as she walked across them and she stopped. “Here!”

“That’s why I asked,” Erin shrugged. “Not your fault you were born with pretty convenient Escape Adventure skills.” She followed behind, holding her hands up and away from Marley, but let her actually take the lead her. A small flashlight had nothing on nightvision. “And it was definitely a tie,” she whispered in retort, but went about looking around the dusty old shop. They were, if anything, going for that authentic aesthetic. When Marley found the hatch, she helped move the small table sitting over it and yanked it open. Pitch black, save for some dimly lit lights that followed a trail under the building. She glanced over to Marley. Guess they were doing this, huh? She opted to climb down the creaky wood ladder first. The tunnel only went in one direction, and she had to duck a little to keep from bumping the ceiling. “So if we’re going the way I think we’re going…” she glanced above, trying to picture the street in her head. She stopped, her grin more excited than before, and she whipped out the big iron key. “We’re going to the prison.”

As Marley went down the ladder she tugged the table as far back to its original position as she could before shutting the hatch. That ought give them a bit more of a lead, right? The tunnel was probably dark, but Marley could see directly down it, to other end. “Yeah, I think you’re right,” she said, giving a grin back in kind. She ran her hand along the dirt wall, now padded with stone and a bit of wire fence to make sure it held. “I think this is the original tunnel that was built along with the town. Or...discovered,” she noted quietly, pausing for a moment to examine it and the pathway, even though this was a race and they weren’t exactly bounds ahead. Still, she couldn’t help it. This stuff had always fascinated her and now here she was, inside one herself. She looked back over at Erin. “Wonder if it's haunted,” she said dismissively, standing back up to follow Erin down the tunnel.

Erin slowed her pace when she glanced back to see Marley soaking in the atmosphere. “No shit?” She asked, more out of genuine surprise than a real question though. It was cool, though, seeing Marley like this. Even for just a few seconds. With the sarcastic quip on pause, she soaked every bit of it up with a softer smile as she watched. “Discovered? That’s ominous. Is this like a prohibition or something?” She started taking slow steps forward, getting a more thorough look around herself. “Please. Please, do not say that,” she shot her another look over her shoulder. Haunted. The quickest way to cut this night off at the knees. They reached the other end of the long pathway and above their heads lay another door. She climbed the ladder and shoved. The door gave way with a heavy groan, and the compartment door smacked against concrete. When she popped her head up, she had to laugh. “I think I know what the tunnel was for.” Heavy iron bars filled her vision, and when she pulled herself up, a low, humorless chuckle slipped from her. “We’re in a fucking jail cell. Of course.”

“No, it was probably some sort of smuggling tunnel,” Marley answered, letting Erin go ahead and do all the heavy lifting. As the hatch swung open and Erin popped her head up, Marley gave a big grin. “Called it.” She scurried up the ladder after Erin and glanced around. In the middle of the room ung the last clue. A cube, unmarked, dangled from a string from the ceiling. Marley went over and tugged it down, examining it. “Okay,” she mumbled, “vague.” She looked around the cell they were, over to the bars. Tried the door-- nothing. Solid metal. She could easily turn intangible and slip through, but somehow cheating didn’t excite her. She wanted to solve this one the right way. After all, she was good at her job, even without her abilities. “Any ideas, genius?”

Erin eyed the cube with as much confusion as Marley. Tried to focus on the game and less about the fact that they were standing in a literal prison cell. Easier fucking said than done though. “I don’t—“ she cleared her throat, shrugging to get the rest of her words across, and tried to laser in on the cube. Oh—wait. The key. She pulled it out of her pocket again. Knew it was the obvious choice, and wasn’t at all surprised when it didn’t work on the door. “Just ruling it out!” She said before Marley could taunt her for that too. Her fingers dug anxiously at the side of her jeans as she looked around the pretty barren cell. Didn’t even stage a bench of any kind to set the mood. Down below, she heard the faintest sounds echoing from all the way down the tunnel. Fuck. Time was ticking down fast now. She tossed the key to Marley and closed the hatch shut again. “Alright, this is it. Last clue and we’re home free.” She planted herself directly on top of the door. It would help, but wouldn’t hold long if they really gave a stellar push upward. “The drunks are coming. It’s now or never, detective. Show me what you’ve got.”

“No, the big key is probably for the very last door-- or the gate. Something big and dramatic,” Marley said, shaking her head, too focused to come out with the quip, even though she was sure she could think of a few. As she examined the cube, she thought to herself how it felt as if it were taken out or off of something, like it was part of something bigger. “Wait--” The walls. She glanced around them, started feeling around, and then-- “Here!” A perfectly square hole in the wall, as well as the thin veneer of a door outline. She popped the cube in and click went the little door. Inside, four keys. Marley grabbed them all and examined them-- all the same, which meant-- “God, I’m good.” She put the others back, closed the door and set the cube in the middle of the floor before holding her out to Erin. “Would you like to do the honors?” she asked, holding the cell key out to her as well.

Ah. Right. That’s exactly why Marley was the puzzlemaster and Erin was one standing on the door to keep the drunks at bay. “Good? You’re the best. Don’t sell yourself short.” She quipped. Oh fuck. Low vibrations signaled movement below. They were on the ladder and tapping against the door. “Would I fucking ever,” she said. Gave the door below a good stomp to scare them. And then graciously, finally, took the key. The door popped open with ease and her face lit up. The drunks had finally managed to open the door but she was already escorting Marley out. One of them even made a run for the open door and slamming the door on this stranger’s face brought Erin more satisfaction than she could have imagined, and she mimicked their hooping and hollering from earlier. “You see this woman?” She emphatically pointed to Marley and handed her the flask. “She just kicked. Your. Asses.”

Rolling her eyes, Marley stood by as Erin slammed the gate in the drunk kids’ faces and started whooping at them. She almost wanted to join in with her, but instead let her have this moment for herself. Marley just watched, smiling, wondering why it was that she felt the way she did, when all she was doing was dragging Erin through a mystery. It wasn’t like either of them was getting anything out of this, and the offer had only come through a challenge. When Erin finally pointed at her, Marley pulled herself from her thoughts and shrugged. “Well, I mean, I do get paid to solve mysteries professionally. So don’t feel too bad,” she quipped, before relenting, “but you should feel a little bad. There’s, what? Four of you? Against one of me? Hmm,” shook her head, “disappointing.” Swung the big key around. “What do you say we go claim our prize, huh?”

Erin couldn’t help but grin wider as she watched Marley taunt the drunks, who were taking it pretty well for the most part. Everything was funny when you were at this stage of the night. Considering the way they were staring at that cube, they’d be in there for a good while. “After you,” she gestured towards the door, letting Marley out. “Don’t tell me the prize is a—“ she glanced out into the room where there were a box of silly props, signs, and a backdrop curtain that resembled the town they had just scoured. “Dumb photo…” she finished. After all that? She sighed, shaking her head, then rifled around the box. Took out a western-styled hat and she supposed it loosely worked with the town’s origins. “Well, partner.” She tipped the hat down at Marley. “We kicked ass. Drinks on me after this.”

“Dumb photo,” Marley said, rifling through the box, “and a 100$ gift card.” Winked before she grabbed a scarf and wrapped it around Erin’s neck, tugging her over to the backdrop, before she could take it off or say no. “Oh, drinks on you? Are you gonna pay, too?” she asked, winking, just as the camera man snapped the photo, hoping to catch Erin off-guard enough to get a nice, funny face in their photo. Once it was done, she folded her arms over her chest and gave Erin a grin. “So, next time I say you trust me, you’re gonna, right? Cause I definitely proved that I can provide fun.”

A $100 gift card? Okay, that sweetened the deal. Erin followed--like there was much of a choice--when the fuzzy scarf was wrapped around her neck. The flash went off just as she tossed her head back, eyes rolling so hard it hurt. She was also sure that they’d be able to hear the amused groan when the print was in their hands. “You’re so annoying,” she laughed, pulling the scarf off, dumping it back into the bin. She wasn’t, though. Not really. She’d had a pretty damn good time tonight, a better time than she’d ever have expected. No stress, no shady backdoor deals--nothing. Just a normal night out with her surprisingly normal, if not sometimes terrifying, Mara friend. She could get used to that. Erin planted the hat right onto Marley’s head instead before she could fight her off. Her smile softened and her tone was a little more serious than it was before when she caught Marley’s eyes. And maybe against her initial judgment, she nodded. “You were right. And I do. Trust you, Marley.”

#chatzy #wickedswriting #chatzy: erin #erin #girls just wanna win

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fuck-customers · 5 years

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Big Bird Deli, Part 3

Continued from https://fuck-customers.tumblr.com/post/185625162330/continuation-of-the-big-bird-deli-story-found

Now, I know you all want me to say I got a new job and rubbed it in my store manager’s face. Sadly, reality is often disappointing. My top choices so far sent back general rejection emails and I’m looking into different industries to branch into. Now, it's not all bad news, but in order to get into the good news, I need to tell you all a story about one co-worker; our constant call off, whom I’ll refer to as CCO. Buckle up for a long story.

CCO was transferred to our store from the one about five minutes down the road a little under three years ago now. I was still in my first year when she transferred in. As I worked with her, she seemed like a good co-worker. Knowledgeable, dependable, she even taught a bunch of tricks to make the job easier. Then, some things started to bubble to the surface.

At first, the only bad thing about her is that she took a long time in the bathroom, 10-15 minutes, pretty much a break without clocking out for one. CCO’s explanation for this was biological, but she couldn’t identify her condition. Skeptical, but ok. Then, she’d also take a long time to get a drink (Non-alcoholic). Managers caught sipping a drink in the break room, and even the training room (Small room with computers for basic training/OSHA/Food Safety) and told her multiple times, she could only do that on breaks. She’d also do stuff that led to numerous signs in our back hall. She’d try store dry food there, take drinks back there, and she’d be on her cell phone on her shift way too much (Mostly showing her cats, making notes, not talking or playing games).

Then, she began to talk constantly. She’d talk with customers even after their orders were done. I constantly saw customers get that “I need to get going but I don’t see my chance to leave yet” expression, and she’d keep blabbering on for a few more minutes as the customer slowly tried to inch away. But it wasn’t just customers, CCO would do the same to co-workers. She’d blabber on while doing nothing or only very small tasks. Sometimes her conversations sucked you in, even though the topics were things from youth, church, or constant updates about her cats (she and husband got up to FIVE cats, and yes, introductions to them included pictures.) I had the highest tolerance for these stories, not sure why.

Now, I can handle those things above. But it got worse. So. Much. Worse. After our store got remodeled just before CCO came in, tasks were updated to include not only sweeping the department floor every night but also washing and squeegeeing the floor. CCO made excuses so she wouldn’t be the one doing it. She’d do anything she could to pass it off on that night’s co-worker. She made excuses that it hurt her back, but refused time and time again to get a doctor’s note to excuse her from the task. She also made excuses that it was tiring, but she stopped those excuses after only a couple weeks. This, coupled with many closers forgetting some tasks, provoked our Deli Manager to make daily task sheets starting this past summer, mostly focused on the closing staff. I, personally, am ok with the sheets, as I view it as a tool to acclimate new employees to the department tasks.

But here’s the big one. She ‘began’ to get migraines within six months of her transfer. She’d slow and become less useful during work, taking long treks to get water and basic medicine that seemed to do the trick at first. The kicker is that she began to call off once every two weeks. Now, you may think that’s not so bad and it’ll count against her. Wrong. She applied for FMLA (Family and Medical Leave Act) for her migraines. She could spend a TON of hours towards it, and she could reapply when she ran out. I started out sympathetic, as I have family members with migraines, but they have methods to curb it so they can work. CCO started calling off once a week. Twice a week. This year, it went up to three times a week. And it was almost always on the same co-worker, Nice Coworker (NC). NC became stressed, she didn’t even want to be scheduled with CCO because of it, but sometimes had no choice. I saw NC break down in tears multiple times. She threatened management to not call her if CCO called off on Sundays, cuz she wouldn’t come in at all. Our deli manager retaliated by trying to schedule CCO less. CCO retaliated by complaining about her hours and claiming hours of other co-workers due to seniority!!! She’d just take their shifts and call-off anyway! So not only was she causing hours to drop, she was basically stealing money from people who actually show up for work.

This all caused morale and productivity to plummet. We were stressed, aggravated even. All the while management still wanted everything perfect while not addressing the problem. And since we’re union, management has to give CCO chance after chance before she’s finally fired or CCO will just run and cry to the union about ‘unfair termination’. We also got wind from people in the store down the street (Sometimes people over here have to cover over there and vice versa) that this behavior happened down there, but not to the extent it got down here, and was the reason CCO transferred. We also learned that she’s had this behavior at all the past jobs she told anyone about. This woman is ten years older than me and hasn’t learned any lessons about her behavior.

Oh, but the cherry on top of this comes in the form of gaslighting and manipulation. CCO dared to call NC her friend while she was claiming NC’s hours and calling off on her! CCO would apologize and say that she “was a shitty person,” and that we “must hate her”. Insincere apologies, self-bashing designed to make you say “No, you’re not a piece of garbage!”(even though she was). CCO also spread rumors about a friend who’s like a brother to me (from another department) when he briefly got in deep trouble. She did this because she thought she could get his full-time position once he was fired (A position that took him being there 12 years and his manager begging multiple times on his behalf to get). Needless to say, I heard through the grapevine and began to truly hate her.

Oh, and remember those call-offs? CCO’d often do those on the weekend, y’know, the busy times. Especially Sundays. Since she was a “Good Christian™”, she’d want to go to church on Sundays. Ok. Reasonable. Then, she called off on Sunday evenings, a shift that’s hell to close alone. Again, on NC mostly. She’d do this repeatedly until our Deli Manager decided to not schedule her on Sunday, two weeks in a row. CCO smirked and told NC that “Her plan had worked!” and that she won’t work Sundays (She didn’t put them off on her availability because it was discouraged, and sometimes even rejected, to not work weekends). To say that, and say that to the person she called off on constantly, is just despicable. Many of us told our deli manager as soon as possible. If she didn’t schedule CCO on Sundays, she’d work on Sundays in any department she had experience in (she’s cross-trained in the Hot foods and meat departments).

At the start of this year. Everyone in the department hated her. Some would be catty or strictly business with her. I opted to pretend to not want to rip her face off, otherwise, I risked forwarding that bile to customers, and I have cried on CCO’s shoulder in the past due to previous work-related bullshit (not the story above). But, we finally had some news from the grapevine; CCO’s doctor AND corporate had picked up on her FMLA abuse. It was flagged as abuse because during times her FMLA expired and needed to be redone her migraines had ‘mysteriously’ disappeared. No call-offs until after FMLA was reinstated. Her doctor told her that he wouldn’t approve more and even if he did, it wouldn’t be approved by the company. By our calculations, she’d run out at the end of May. She ran out mid-May. All we had to do was wait.

And this past week, the good news! Turns out CCO didn’t help NC much the Saturday of my paid vacation. NC went to Store Manager on Wednesday, on her day off, to report CCO. Store Manager told NC that CCO, and potentially all of the deli, was going to get pulled into the office soon one by one. Details couldn’t be said due to confidentiality but NC said that shit was about to go down, we all just didn’t know what. On Friday, now mid-June, our Union Steward (A worker to represents the union while not working for the union directly) came and got CCO and pulled her into the office with Store Manager. Ten minutes later, CCO was escorted out of the store by Loss Prevention. The scales finally tipped when the customer complaints stacked up, and that she got into a verbal argument with a co-worker (Not me or NC) with a manager as a witness. Said co-worker was at the store on her day off, shopping and chatting with us briefly. While CCO passed by, CCO called her a bitch, in earshot of Loss Prevention. But that was the last we’ve seen of CCO.

Slight dancing was had, and upper management reminded us that this is an opportunity to turn the deli around. We got a new person who started during my vacation. She’s absolutely amazing and gets along with everyone. It’s only been a few days, but already other departments are commenting that the deli seems happier and that a great weight has been lifted. I always joked about giving CCO this big speech in a dark, even tone and saying she needs to go on disability or welfare if her work ethic or migraines are that bad. But, I decided against doing a big Facebook drama thing. Instead, I blocked her on social media and her phone number. I’m glad to finally cut her out of my life permanently.

As for me? I’m still at Big Bird. Now that the main problem is gone, I can take my time finding a good job and not go for the first one that gives me an interview. I still want to leave because of upper management, and I haven’t received confirmation that my write up was overturned. Things are looking up, and I’m glad we now have a solid, competent team as we get ready for the 4th of July sales.

Last word: I was going to post this as is, but today, I heard something amazing. A co-worker had to work a split shift, beginning down the road then coming up to our store. Turns out, CCO didn’t tell her husband that she got fired! She told him she was on vacation! And he works down the street! I busted up laughing, imagining scenarios when he finds out she lied. Oh, what I wouldn’t give to be a fly on the wall for that confrontation. :3

TL;DR

Not much has happened other than a co-worker getting fired and absolutely deserving it after putting the deli under so much stress.

#submissions #happy ending #fuck co-workers #fuck coworkers #retail justice #submission

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holyfourthofjulyweenieroast · 5 years

Text

Notes on Season 15- Part 1 (contains spoilers, are mostly complaints about Torres), and are my personal opinions, don’t @ me)

Since Season 15 started rerunning in Australia on 19 November, I’ve decided to write down things I forgot or would like to emphasise upon:

Family Ties (originally Ep. 13, but for some reason it aired as Ep. 12)

Kayla #3 makes her first appearance

Ouch, poor Jimmy

Yuck, Torres is just so sleazy (plus hanging Bishop out to dry, again?)

That court-ordered breathalyser thing should be put in every car (or at least on the first offence rather than repeat offenders)

What sort of idiot would leave their garage unlocked with the keys in the car

Aww, Jackie mention

I love Sloane and Vance’s friendship

Abby doing the same thing she did to Tony and Ziva!

Plot twist, anyone?

‘Shave and a Haircut’, nice knock

Nice inspiration from ‘Family First’ there

More Sloane-and-Faith foreshadowing

Kayla is such a good person- she takes after her parents in loyalty and friendship, among many other things

Vance is such a good father, and it really showed throughout the episode

NCIS is always great at incorporating legal issues into episodes, just like this one

WHY COULDN’T REEVES HAVE BEEN THE THIRD AGENT SO TORRES AND QUINN WOULD HAVE NEVER EXISTED AND CBS WOULD’VE SAVED HEAPS OF MONEY HIRING ONE MAIN CHARACTER THAT AUDIENCES ALREADY KNEW AND LOVED INSTEAD OF TWO NEW ANNOYING ONES

Keep Your Friends Close (originally Ep. 14, but for some reason it aired as Ep. 13)

Stop showing off, Torres

Go, McGee

Classic Fornell humour, I’ve missed it

Fornell and Vance annoying Gibbs will never get old

Poor Gibbs- I’d be acting the exact same way

Aww, Jimmy

Another example of why military personnel, and Americans in general, need better healthcare (not to say that nobody else needs better healthcare, but the US’ is notoriously poor)

Abby’s bedtime story for the twins was so cute

I feel sorry for Hicks’ lawyer

Do all prisons give inmates clothes with their name on them?

Reeves definitely doesn’t believe McGee

I’m with Bishop- that place sounds awesome

STOP SHOWING OFF, TORRES

I absolutely love Fornell, and I gotta say, this new look is really working for him

Vance, you’re the absolute best

‘brass mole’ is my new favourite phrase

Poor Fornell

That’s usually what ‘victim’ means, lady, and you’re a total asshole for getting a married guy to cheat on his wife

I’m on the wife’s side- she deserves jail time, sure, but she should also get the life insurance money

Fornell and Gibbs have such a great friendship

Keep Your Enemies Closer (originally Ep. 15, but for some reason it aired as Ep. 14)

Being insensitive and showing off- two of Torres’ most prized qualities

Seriously, Torres? Stealing food again, ugh

Hicks really is a great villain

Reeves’ Brummie accent is fascinating when you listen to it properly

Oof, poor McGee- that’s gotta hurt

I love how Fornell rubs the getting-fired in Gibbs’ face every opportunity he gets

I feel sorry for Vance, having to put up with everything the team does

Bishop and Reeves standing close together again, aww

Jimmy is such a good friend

That’s what blowing your nose is for, idiot- also, go Fornell

That was a probie move, McGee

Fornell and Gibbs save the day!

Triff had great lines this episode

Double Down (originally Ep. 10, but for some reason it aired as Ep. 15)

Bishop being intentionally annoying to get the case was great

Chet, while funny, is not someone I’d be want to be stuck with

I miss Analyst Bishop

Bishop and McGee’s sibling bond is the best

Torres has been rubbing off on Bishop way too much, and I do not like it

Stop being such an asshole, Torres- Sloane knows the area way better than you

Can something be uncalled-for but fair at the same time?

The Senator getting shot while saving Chet? Oof

Ouch, hiding stuff from Vance is not good

Poor Senator

Don’t be so dramatic and time-wasting, Torres- nobody likes or appreciates it

Pretty good scam, but pretty illegal (and by ‘pretty’ I mean ‘very’)

NCIS is great at doing emotional moments

Handle With Care

Torres should know by now that you should save everything work-related, especially if it’s financial

Writing a helicopter off as a company car is a power move

The care-package organisation is such a sweet thing

Bishop and Reeves’ standing-close-together is on par with Tony and Ziva’s

Torres, this is nobody’s fault but yours

This Dexter guy is like the Fox News of podcasts, if my knowledge of US TV channels is accurate

I hate it how people shit on the military all the time, especially if they have no idea what it’s like

Go, Gibbs- this guy’s an asshole, and besides, his teeth creep me out

Ugh, seriously, Torres? Neglecting work for personal stuff again

Sloane and Vance are such a great brotp (Voane? Slance?)

That takedown was amazing

Torres is so insufferable

The Sloane-and-John scenes had a lot of foreshadowing to the Faith reveal

One Man’s Trash

Kasie’s first episode!

Don’t be so judgemental, Torres

This Wyatt guy’s collection is pretty impressive

Oof, a stolen war stick is not good

Shut up, Torres

Abby’s lollipop idea was so sweet

God, Torres is such an asshole

Ducky and Kasie have such a cute relationship already

Kasie being a huge Abby fan was super-relatable, and their hug was so cute

It’s pretty cool how they incorporated American Pickers into the episode

Death From Above

At least Ducky’s book is going over better than Deep Six did

Torres is so disrespectful- at the bare minimum he could’ve read at least one page, and not complained loudly for everyone to hear

Trust Torres to slack off and find something to do other than work

Senior! I almost forgot he was in this episode

Reeves is so much taller than everyone else and it’s kinda hilarious- also, he’s honestly the sweetest person ever

Way to state the obvious, Torres

NYB mention, so sad

Poor Reeves, I’d be reacting the exact same way

Aww, Senior protecting Abby (and lying pretty well)

Torres wouldn’t get into half the problems he does if he listened and followed orders once in a while

Seriously, Torres? Yuck, also you’re a terrible liar (but Lady Bait is a great song/piece of music, I gotta admit)

Ari mention, ouch

Is Torres incapable of not having a massive, pigheaded ego for even one second?

Sloane shrinking Leslie was super-awesome

Vance saves the day!

Gibbs knows better than to tell two different people two different lies- I wonder why he did

The scene with Bishop, Jimmy and Vance in the lab was peak comedy

Was the Burke guy talking like Batman on purpose?

The directing of this episode was incredible

The Numerical Limit

Torres has been rubbing off on Bishop way too much

Another day, another insensitive remark

LVM mention!

I don’t like Asshole Bishop as much as Analyst Bishop

Again with Torres assuming that he has a monopoly on speaking more than one language

The ‘bleachorexic’ conversation instantly reminded me of McGee when he over-bleached his teeth

Oof, taking Reeves down is not easy feat

I don’t know why anyone would want or need their own mattress salesman, but you do you, Sloane

I’d absolutely love a whole truck full of icecream

I don’t envy Vance’s situation- he has to be the example even when it sucks

Cue the tears

This episode conveyed such an important message and issue- refugees are such a contentious topic

Sight Unseen

Hypocrite much, Torres?

This is just like the sick lieutenant all over again, ugh

SHUT. UP. TORRES.

Abby and Reeves have such a sweet friendship- it sucks that we didn’t get to see more of it

TORRES, I HATE YOU SO MUCH

I love Petty Sloane

Yuck, can he be any more of an insensitive asshole?

That is a really big tooth

Torres always has to ruin nice moments by opening his big fat mouth

Why is it that lawyers are always involved in the crime

Ugh, the end scene was so awkward

One Step Forward

Neglecting work to slack off yet again

WHY DOES TORRES HAVE TO BE SUCH AN ASSHOLE?

Slance brotp ftw!

Abby’s so sweet- ‘angel in platform shoes’ is right

Poor Reeves, this resonates so much with him and it’s so heartbreaking

SHUT. UP. TORRES.

The foreshadowing was so sad, especially because we didn’t know it was at the time

Ouch, poor Jimmy

Reeves is the best, I want to cry (I am)

That scene was terrible to watch

Oof

Sweetest scene ever

AAAAAAHHH

Homeless vets is such a terrible issue, and so unfair- it’s great whenever NCIS features it in an episode

Two Steps Back

I’m digging Fornell’s look (and this poker group)

The reveal was terrible

CRYING

Aww, Gibbs

Bishop crying made me cry even more

Jimmy and McGee being brothers, aww

Post-autopsy Reeves was even worse than pre-

You have to be nice to Major Mass Spec, Torres- you should know that by now

Tony being Tony

McGee’s voice breaking was tear-inducing

McGee helping Abby with her pigtails was so sweet

Rolodex- now there’s a word I haven’t heard in a while

What do you know, Torres is stating the obvious

‘Wild Goose’ was honestly so funny

Torres is a total dumbass for getting himself trapped in the coffin- he should’ve known Abby would try to trick him somehow (and in a really funny way at that)

Gibbs trying not to smile was hilarious

The in-depth flashback of the shooting was horrible, especially seeing Reeves die

Abby talking to Reeves in Autopsy made me cry so hard

Caf-POW! pills was ingenious

The parallels between these café scenes and in Toxic were so clever and sad at the same time, especially the dialogue

I cried non-stop for the rest of the episode when I watched it for the first time, and I still am now

Abby’s apartment was awesome, and I love how things from past seasons were incorporated- it was so bittersweet seeing all the memories

They really pulled out all the stops in this episode with bringing characters back, and it was so special for Abby’s last episode

The acting in this episode was amazing, and the flashbacks made me cry so much

Fallout

Torres is so bigheaded

Reeves mention, so painful

I love the way Vance delivers lines

Was Torres the landlord?

Kasie!!!

Snarky Gibbs!

Oof

Aaah, so sad

Bishop and Reeves had such a great friendship

Jimmy time! I love it when he gets moments to shine

I love it when Sloane says ‘hiya’

Deep Six mention!

Uh-oh

Poor Phil, that’s one of the worst-ever situations to be in

Aww, that photo is so sweet

Kasie is babie

Phil has BFE (Big Fornell Energy), right down to the puttanesca- I’m glad he wasn’t a one-time character bc he’s great

Date With Destiny

What would Torres know about being handsome

Vance is so supportive, I love his and Sloane’s friendship

Shannon’s birthday, so sad

It’s a ship, not a boat- you tell him, McGee

I’m loving Kasie’s taste in music

Bishop and Sloane are another great brotp

Aww, Admiral mention

Eek

Damn straight Torres is sexist- and incorrect, remember the S1 episode with the explosiver hersteller who faked her memory loss (yes, I know Torres wasn’t there then so he likely wouldn’t know, but anyway the main point is that he’s sexist)?

Kasie’s so adwarkable

Not good

Sloane’s got a great innocent face

Jimmy and Kasie have such a great friendship already

That’s such a terrible thing to live through- Sophie’s choices suck, especially when it’s two lives

It’s Ziva’s ‘death’ all over again- no body, no proof

That was incredible, showing the effects of PTSD and how it affects people

Ya think, Torres?

I almost forgot he kidnapped Vance

#season 15 #ncis season 15 #ncis #naval criminal investigative service

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chasholidays · 7 years

Note

Prompt: Bellamy is there for Clarke through the loss of her dad, Wells, Finn, Lexa & pretty much everyone else in her life ever.

Bellamy is eleven when Octavia comes home and says, “Clarke’s dad died.”

His reaction is kneejerk, automatic. “No he didn’t, O. That’s not not what die means.”

“He did so! Mrs. Park told us. They were in a car crash and her dad died and Clarke got hurt so she isn’t going to be in school for a while. We made a card for her and everything.”

He swallows hard. “Really?”

“I wouldn’t lie about that,” she says, and he knows that’s true. He thought she might not know what she was saying, but that’s different from lying. If she’s sure, and she seems to be, then it must be true.

“I know, I’m sorry. That’s awful. Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Nothing happened to me. But I was thinking we could go visit, maybe?”

O and Clarke aren’t exactly best friends, but Clarke’s been over a few times, and Bellamy likes her well enough, for an eight-year-old. She’s no more annoying than any of his sister’s other friends. Even a little less annoying, sometimes.

“Do you know what hospital?” She shakes her head, and he nods. “Okay. I’ll come pick you up from school tomorrow and ask Mrs. Park if she knows about visiting and stuff. They might not want anyone to come by yet, it’s probably really tough.”

“Okay. Thanks, Bell.”

“Sure.” He gives her a smile. “What do you want for dinner?”

Mrs. Park appreciates his concern, but as she expected, he says it’s probably not a good idea to go visit yet. Maybe in a week.

So Bellamy comes back, obedient, a week later, to ask if she thinks Clarke might be ready for visitors.

“We just want to make sure she’s not alone.”

Mrs. Park smiles. “I believe her mother said she was home. Let me just give her a call for you.”

He feels a little guilty, going to Clarke’s actual house; he doesn’t know her mother, and even though he’s escorting his sister, he can’t help thinking he’s a little out of place.

The woman who opens the door looks a little young to be her mother, and her smile is weary. “May I help you?”

“I’m Bellamy Blake,” he says, “and this is my sister, Octavia. She’s in Clarke’s class at school. We just wanted to check in, if she’s ready for visitors.”

“Let me go ask Abby,” says the woman, with a smile. “I’m sure Clarke will be happy to see you.”

It feels like a lot of checking in, but he guesses he can’t really blame anyone. It must be pretty tough.

Clarke’s mother smiles, shakes both their hands and thanks them for coming by, says Clarke hasn’t had many visitors yet. Her arm is broken and she’s shaken, but she’ll be happy to see some friends.

Bellamy lingers outside the door at first, awkward, but Octavia tugs. “Come on, Bell. Don’t be weird. Hey, Clarke,” she says, soft.

Clarke looks up from her book, eyes a little red, but smile steady. “Hi, Octavia. Bellamy. Thanks for coming.”

O nods. “Mrs. Park told us what happened. I’m sorry.”

“Thanks,” she says, looking down at her hands. “How’s school?”

She and Octavia talk about friends and school for a while, and Bellamy lets his eye wander, checking out the room, as large as his and his sister’s put together, full of books and toys and love.

Pictures of her dad, too; they look like they’re close.

“Where’s the bathroom?” Octavia asks, and when Clarke gives her directions, Bellamy finds himself suddenly alone with Clarke.

She looks about as uncomfortable with the whole thing as he is, so he shifts closer. “What were you reading?”

“Frog and Toad Are Friends,” she says, holding it up. “My dad used to read it to me.”

“Yeah, I used to read that to O when she was a kid.”

“You’ve been taking care of her for a while, right?”

“Forever, yeah. She’s my sister.”

“And you guys don’t have a dad.”

“No.”

Clarke nods. “But you’re okay.”

It feels like it might be too strong a word, but–they are, right? Most of the time. “You will be too,” he says, because that feels like what she’s asking. “I’m lucky, I don’t remember when my dad died, but–you’ll be fine. Eventually.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.” He clears his throat, smiles a little. “If you ever need–someone else to talk to. I’m around. I know you’ve got plenty of people, but–”

“Thanks. That’s nice of you.”

“I mean it,” he says. “If you ever want an older-brother type, I’m around.”

“Okay,” she says, smiling a little. “I’ll let you know.”

He doesn’t really believe it, and he doesn’t hear from her for years, honestly forgets about her, for the most part. She and Octavia drift apart as they get older, moving to different friend groups, still in classes together sometimes, but not friends, not really.

It’s five years later, at the end of his sophomore year, when he leaves work at the deli on main street to find Clarke waiting for him, this small, scowling form leaning on his car, arms crossed over her chest as she pretends not to be watching the door.

“Clarke, right?” he asks, once he’s remembered her all the way.

“Hi.”

“Either you’re waiting for me or you didn’t know whose car this was,” he remarks, and her mouth tugs up at one side.

“I was waiting for you.”

“Why?”

“Do you remember when my dad died?”

“Yeah.”

“You said I could come to you if I needed someone to talk to, and I do.”

His first reaction is that she must be incredibly hard up, but that’s not really a constructive thing to say. And it’s not like he’s unwilling to help some poor kid who needs some company. If she is hard up, that just means she really needs it.

“Okay. Driving, walking, sitting?” At her frown, he clarifies, “Where do you want to talk?”

“Oh, um–driving is fine. If it’s–if that’s okay. Sorry, I know this is–really weird.”

“It’s fine, I don’t mind.” He unlocks it. “You can even have shotgun.”

She snorts, soft. “Wow. Generous.”

“Don’t say I never did anything for you. Anywhere in particular you want to go?”

“Not off the top of my head.”

It should probably be weirder, but Arcadia isn’t that big a town, and he does know Clarke. And she’s probably going to do all the work here.

“I’m just going to drive around, then.”

“Thanks.” She waits until they’re in motion before she says, “I had a fight with my best friend. Which I obviously couldn’t talk to him about, because the fight’s with him, and if I tell my other friends, they’ll get involved.”

“So you want an impartial third party?”

“Pretty much. And I saw your sister and that reminded me—you offered. Sorry it took me so long to take you up on it.”

“I’m amazed you remembered.”

“It was a shitty time,” she says, sounding like she’s forty, not thirteen. “You were nice to me.”

“And now it’s another shitty time.”

“Not nearly that bad. Thank god,” she adds.

“So what happened?”

“He told me he liked me. Like, you know. As more than a friend. And I told him I didn’t like him back. And I guess he was pretty sure about it?” She sighs. “I don’t know. I wasn’t even—I don’t want to date anyone yet.”

“No?”

“How old are you again?”

“Legal to drive you. Sixteen.”

“I assume you remember how stupid dating is in middle school. It lasts like a week and all you do is hold hands and maybe get a couple bad kisses in.”

“Wow. You’re jaded for thirteen.”

“I don’t want to screw up my friendship with Wells for that.”

“Maybe it would be better.”

“Maybe. But I don’t like him like that.”

“If he’s your best friend, I doubt you lost him,” he finally says. “Yeah, it’ll be kind of awkward for a while, and getting rejected sucks, but—he’ll probably get over it.”

“I know. I still feel like I did something wrong.”

“You didn’t. It’s not your fault you’re not interested in him.”

“Is this just what you do? Brother for hire?”

“If you were my sister I’d probably be threatening to beat Wells up. Which would suck, I like Wells.”

Clarke snorts. “You know Wells?”

“He’s in the Latin club.”

“Of course he is. I like him too, just not—“

“For dating. I get it.”

“Thanks for listening.”

“Like I said, any time.”

She moves up to high school next year, and they nod when they pass each other in the halls, talk if they happen to be in the same place for long enough.

Her sophomore year, she comes back from the summer with her hair cut short and dyed red in one patch, and she learned to dress to accentuate her body type instead of hiding it, which he feels like an asshole for noticing, but it’s really noticeable. Clarke Griffin got hot is a popular topic of conversation, even among seniors.

Which is probably why he hears when she starts dating Finn Collins, and why when he hears that Finn died, suddenly, in a car crash, he goes to her immediately. Without even thinking about it.

Her mother opens the door this time, not the family friend from before. “May I help you?”

“I’m a friend of Clarke’s, I wanted to—“

“Oh. Yes, of course. Let me see if she’s up for company.”

“It’s Bellamy,” he tells her. It feels like it might make a difference.

He doubts she remembers him, but she smiles anyway. “I’ll let her know you’re here, Bellamy.”

The way up to Clarke’s room is the same, and he didn’t realize before how stuck the memory was in his brain, how much it stayed with him. It didn’t seem like such a big deal at the time.

The door is ajar, and he knocks softly before pushing it open. Clarke’s eyes are red, but dry, and he offers her a small smile.

“Thought you might need someone to talk to.”

She throws herself at him, shaking with tears like a dam is breaking, and he just holds her, rubbing soothing circles on her back, saying words he doesn’t actually hear himself.

He’s not sure how long it takes for her to cry herself out, but she says in his arms even after, taking the comfort, and it’s not until she pulls back that he lets her go.

“Don’t apologize,” he says, before she can say anything.

Her laugh is still watery. “Can I thank you?”

“Sure.”

“Thanks.”

"You’re welcome.”

They’re mostly friends after that, albeit in a strange way. He makes sure to check in on her for the first few weeks, and he keeps checking in for a while after that. Some of his friends tease him about it, flirting with the hot sophomore, but it’s not really like that. Maybe if it wasn’t his senior year, if he wasn’t already into college, he might try something, someday. Once the pain had faded.

As it is, she comes to his graduation and kisses him on the cheek and thanks him for everything, and he says, “I’m still available for long-distance conversations, if you need them.”

He means it, like he always means it, but he doesn’t really expect anything. They’ve never been the kind of friends who just chat. But the first week of his freshman year, Clarke Facebook messages him to ask how college is going, and suddenly that’s a part of his routine. She’s a junior this year, starting to get into looking for colleges and full of questions, but that quickly turns into casual conversation.

“When did you and Clarke Griffin get so close?” Octavia asks, when he comes back for spring break and makes plans to hang out with her.

“Just kind of happened,” he says, with a shrug.

They don’t see a lot of each other, even when he’s home, but they still chat almost every day. She talks him through his breakup with Roma sophomore year and brags about finally getting to help him with a breakup for a change. He helps her work through a bisexuality crisis a few weeks after that, and then he goes through one of his own when he gets a crush on and somehow manages to date a guy the year after that.

Her senior year of college, Lexa happens, and he kind of wonders if that’s it for her. It seems pretty serious.

She calls him when they break up, a first for them, and he’s so shocked he nearly drops the phone. “Hi?”

“Hey. Lexa and I broke up.”

“Shit. Sorry.”

“I kind of saw it coming.”

“Yeah.” They’d talked about it, but he’d mostly been rooting for them to make it. Except for the small, mostly ignored part of him that still thinks Clarke is kind of pretty and kind of amazing and kind of one of his favorite people in the world. “Still.”

She sighs. “Yeah. But we were going different places, and that was–it wasn’t negotiable for her. She’s moving to California and she doesn’t want to do long distance. So–we broke up.”

“I’m sorry. Are you still thinking you’re going to come to Boston?”

He thinks his voice comes out even on the question, like he doesn’t think about it all the fucking time and wonder. She certainly doesn’t seem to think it’s weird, just says, “That’s the plan, yeah. I’ve got an interview in a couple weeks, can I crash on your couch?”

“Yeah, always. Any time.”

She comes down a few times, and he never says anything, never makes a move, but he’s so aware that they’re both single now, that she’s moving to his city, to his neighborhood. That she’ll be close he could see her whenever he wanted to.

He helps her move into her new place and she buys him a pizza, and he doesn’t kiss her, spends a week aware, all the time, of how he isn’t kissing her.

Then she shows up at his door.

“Hey,” he says, cautious.

“Hey. I need to talk to you about something?”

“Yeah, of course. Is everything okay? What happened?”

“Miller’s not home, right?”

“On a date.”

“Okay.” She lets out a break. “I think I’m in love with you. And you don’t have to be–I know you probably still think I’m your second screw-up little sister, but I thought I should double check in case–”

“I don’t,” he says, and kisses her.

“You’re not going to have anyone to talk to if we break up,” he tells her, a few hours later, when they’re cuddled together in his bed, warm and sated and close.

She yawns and kisses his shoulder. “I know. I’m not worried.”

“No,” he admits, with a smile. “Me neither.”

#whyaremyfandomssocruel

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wineanddinosaur · 3 years

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VinePair Podcast: TV Loves Food Shows. Why Not Drinks?

VinePair, in partnership with Rémy Martin, presents the Bartender Talent Academy, an exciting Cognac cocktail competition. Showcase your most creative Sidecar cocktail recipes to compete for a chance at the grand prize: a trip to Cognac, France in October to test your bartending skills against the world’s best. All you need is a shaker and a passport. Visit www.bartendertalentacademy.com for all competition details.

This week on the “VinePair Podcast,” Adam Teeter, Zach Geballe, and Joanna Sciarrino discuss the lack of drinks-focused shows on television. After listing what they have been drinking recently — including hard seltzer smoothies from Smooj — our hosts dive into a discussion about why so few drinks-focused shows have successfully aired.

Teeter shares his own experience creating a pilot for a drinks-based TV show with VinePair tastings director Keith Beavers — and muses on what prevents producers from taking risks on shows like it. Then, Geballe, Sciarrino, and Teeter discuss what drinks-focused shows could do differently in order to ultimately experience the kind of success that food television has enjoyed over the past decade.

If you have any thoughts on drinks-based shows, please send your ideas to [email protected].

Listen Online

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Listen on Spotify

Or Check out the Conversation Here

Adam Teeter: From VinePair’s New York City headquarters, I’m Adam Teeter.

Joanna Scarrino: I’m Joanna Sciarrino.

Zach Geballe: And in Seattle, Washington, I’m Zach Geballe.

A: And this is the “VinePair Podcast.” Zach, you seem to have survived a heat wave, and now we are experiencing a heat wave. Are you doing OK, buddy?

Z: I am, yeah. It was an incredibly delightful 65 and cloudy this morning here in Seattle after we set an all-time high on Sunday. Then, we beat it by 5 degrees on Monday, so yay us! Hooray! It’s funny, this is a question for the both of you to ponder when it comes to extreme heat. It definitely got to a point on Sunday and Monday where I didn’t even want to drink. Normally, I want to have a drink in the afternoon and evening. On Sunday, only water sounded good to me. Fortunately, that temperature is, as of yet, not very common, but when it gets that hot, do you even think about having a drink?

A: No, I’m not in that position.

Z: OK, fair enough.

A: I would like a cold beer. I would only get something super refreshing, but I agree with you that when it does get super hot, I just want water. Also, alcohol dehydrates, which is not fun, but it’s crazy because I think a lot of people were a little bummed when they looked at the forecast. It was supposed to be really hot, but it’s going to be rainy. But I would think that’s not a bad thing.

Z: Yeah, it would be a nice relief after what you guys are going through right now.

A: It’s not fun, man. In the meantime, what have you been drinking?

Z: For me, the thing that I had most recently was a couple of Chardonnays that are both, I think, really exceptional. One is from Philippe Pacalet, a producer in Burgundy. It was the Puligny-Montrachet. My wife and I have this very fun tradition. When we were dating, Caitlin thought if we got engaged, I would get her a ring and she wouldn’t get me anything. Yes, I understand historically, but frankly, she makes a lot more money than me, so she could certainly buy me something. Well, I didn’t want a ring so we decided that if we got engaged, which we obviously did and then got married, that she would give me a case of wine. Our tradition has been to open one bottle a year on the anniversary of our engagement, which was June 28. She talked to the proprietors at the wine shop that I frequented, and they helped her pick out a case of wine, which was mostly successful. There were one or two wines in there that I probably wouldn’t have bought if it was me, but that’s cool. Then the day before, I had a Chardonnay from Ramey Wine Cellars, which is in Healdsburg in Sonoma. Both beautiful wines were beautiful expressions of a variety that I really like with some richness, but not too oily. Fruit ripeness but not over-ripeness befitting the Sonoma Coast Chardonnay. It’s got a little more saltiness and a lot more earthiness and savory notes in the Burgundy. Those are the two things I had recently that I really, really enjoyed. Joanna, what about you?

J: I finally had a hard seltzer smoothie. Talk about a not particularly refreshing beverage. It was quite thick, but also effervescent and fruity and a little bit bitter.

Z: Oh, interesting.

J: Yeah, it is a very interesting thing. In one case, there was coconut cream in it, so that was an interesting thing I got to try recently. Also, I had my first High Noon.

A: Wow, so you just went all-in on seltzers this weekend?

J: Yeah. I’m really into trying new RTDs recently, just checking them out. The High Noon was really good. I enjoyed it. I’m not big on hard seltzer myself, but the High Noon, for whatever reason, was more flavorful and better for me.

A: Amazing, so I finally had my first hard seltzer smoothie, too.

J: Oh really?!

A: Yeah, I had it on Saturday and it was called Smooj.

J: I had Smooj, too!

A: I had the exact one you had. I could only drink like three sips of it. It was weird. It was really tasty, and yet I couldn’t drink more of it. It tasted like a hard seltzer Piña Colada. It was so weird. Is this what the kids are into nowadays? Maybe this is not my thing, but it was an experience, to say the least. Then, I had some other really fun beverages, since it was my birthday.

Z: Oh, that’s right.

A: Yeah, it’s OK that you forgot.

Z: We wished you a happy birthday last time, man!

A: I know.

Z: Are you one of these “I-have-a-whole-birthday-month” people?

A: No, no, no. Anyways, we had some really nice cocktails. Some people brought really good pre-made rum drinks, which were pretty delicious and we also enjoyed some Smooj. It was so weird. Then, the funniest thing is I had this magnum of wine that I’d been saving for a while. It was a magnum of Tablas Creek, actually, and I was really excited to open it. We did, and it was pretty bad.

Z: It’s so funny. I was just talking to someone about this the other day about how I think, on the podcast, we have generally encouraged people to just go ahead and open the wines unless you are really dead set on collecting and saving. You could end up with a situation where you potentially have one you’ve been looking forward to forever, and then it just doesn’t deliver. That sucks. It’s no one’s fault really, but it’s still a big bummer.

A: It’s a massive bummer. It was definitely a bummer for it not to have been as alive as I wanted it to be. Otherwise, it was a fun birthday, and delicious beverages were consumed.

Z: Have you ever been to Tablas Creek?

A: I have. It was an awesome experience.

Z: Yeah, that’s a place I’d like to go because I’ve never been.

A: It was a really awesome experience. Check out their nursery, it was super cool. It was good.

J: I have a question before we get into our topic for Zach. How is your Paper Plane riff coming along?

Z: Oh, that’s a really good question. I have not yet done what I said I would do last week because as I mentioned, my prime cocktail consumption is a weekend thing. It was too hot to think about anything, especially a relatively heavy cocktail. However, the plan actually for tonight at some point is to try one with some dry Curaçao as the ingredient that maybe will bring balance back to the cocktail.

A: Look at you!

Z: Well, I got a lot of home bar ingredients, so I’ve got to find something to use them for. As I’ve become like you guys, more inclined towards a Margarita that doesn’t have a lot of orange liqueur in it, I gotta figure out something to do with that with a dry Curaçao. Maybe this will be a good outlet for it because I certainly would drink a lot of this cocktail if I can dial it all the way in, but we’ll see.

A: Cool. Zach, want to kick off our topic for this week?

Z: I do. Plus, we got to get ready because you’re going to be MIA in a couple of weeks.

A: I think you’re really excited that I have a vacation coming up. Sorry, not really a vacation, but a work trip.

Z: I’m just excited for you because your work trips always are fruitful for the company.

A: And also, GTFO!

Z: Anyhow, the topic that I want to talk about today started with a thought about “Top Chef,” because one of the contestants who’s near the end of the competition, this go-round, is from Seattle and someone I know a little bit. I’m not a big “Top Chef” fan. I think I watched a couple of the early seasons, but I am not really a fan of cooking competition shows. I was a huge “Iron Chef” fan when I was a kid because I was a weird kid. As an adult, they haven’t been as interesting to me or I just haven’t had the time for them. Yet, it made me think about shows, whether it’s competition-oriented potentially with cocktails, or even something wine- or beer-focused. Why have drinks struggled so much to crack into television? There are not only channels devoted to food, but even outside of that, there are so many shows that have food at the center — whether it’s travel, competitions, or just how-tos. Yet, there’s almost none of that in the drink space. I have some theories, but Joanna, you have a lot of experience on the food side and have seen certainly how the success of these shows has driven celebrity and interest in food. Why do you think it is that drinks have not been able to get into this world?

J: Yeah, I don’t know. I’ve been thinking about this. There are just so many food shows and baking shows, specifically, that I think are mesmerizing to people and have a wider entry point for people, perhaps. I think there’s also something about dishes coming together and cakes and things like that coming together, too, that is really compelling. As you said, the competition-style or the gamification of these things, I think is really compelling for people to watch. Competing against other professionals or people in the space is really interesting to watch. I think it also just happened with the rise of food media. People really got into it in the last 5-10 years.

A: Oh, at least 10.

J: Yeah, “Iron Chef” was the first one.

A: I love “Iron Chef.” As someone who used to watch the Food Network before they would go to bed in college.

J: Same!

A: Yeah, I was obsessed with it. I was always really into food media. I do think that I have a really weird first-hand amount of knowledge in this because Keith, who is VinePair’s tastings director, and I actually shot a pilot of a drink show for the Food Network.

Z: Tell us more.

A: Not many people know that. Well before VinePair, I was in the music industry, actually, and Keith owned a wine shop and a restaurant in the East Village. He and I came up with this idea for this music series called “Vivo In Vino.” I had all these record industry contacts and he had a restaurant. Sunday nights were not the most lucrative in the restaurant business in New York City. He said, “Well, what if we just shut down the restaurant on Sunday nights? You book these big bands and they play these intimate shows.” Basically, the whole idea from my point of view had come from my recognition that people in the music business really missed those small shows they played when they were baby bands. As you’re trying to make it, you would start playing in these rooms of 20 people rather than 100 people, than 150 people. Ultimately, you’d start playing 500,000-person shows and it never felt the same. A lot of bands miss that 100-people feel, so we packed 75 to 100 people into his restaurant — probably against fire code. We thought, how are we gonna pay for this? The way we figured it out was to sell tickets, but also bring on a sponsor. We’re both into wine, so what if we make this sponsor a wine brand? Then, they come in, and basically halfway through the set, we have a conversation about the wine. We’re combining teaching people about wine, demystifying wine, with awesome music. That’s how it started. Lo and behold, a person that I knew who was a producer in L.A. heard about it and said, “Have you ever thought about doing a show about alcohol?” And I said, “No, but I love food TV. I think we could do this.” The concept of “Juiced,” which is what they named it, was that we would travel around the world experiencing beverages and people’s cultures. It is similar to “No Reservations” and this is really the time when “No Reservations” was just becoming popular. It was still on the Travel Channel. I don’t know if it was called “No Reservations.” It was still called…

Z: “Parts Unknown,” right?

A: I’m sorry, it was called “No Reservations,” and then it became “Parts Unknown” when it went to CNN. It was just becoming something. At the time, she was producing at a company that was run by a pretty famous editor named Angus Wall. Basically, along with some other producers, came together to produce this show. It was a really interesting experience. What we thought we were doing was producing really engaging TV but we kept hearing from everyone that drinks don’t work on TV. And we asked, “Why? We’re coming out with really fun episodes and this is going to be such a blast” and all this shit. Then, we kept hearing that drinks don’t work on TV. Well, is there any proof of that? They said, “No, but don’t drinks don’t work on TV.” The biggest thing we heard is that one of the reasons drinks don’t work on TV is so many of them go back to the traditional way that food TV works, which is that they actually talk about dishes. What we were proposing with “Juiced” and actually what I think we’ve done pretty successfully with some of the stuff we shot for VinePair is actually more cultural. The beverage is not the center. We’re not going to sit there sniffing the wine and talking about the aromas. I know SOMM TV exists at this point, but I don’t know how many subscribers it has. There’s a lot of that there with the “Somm” movies where they’re actually giving tasting notes. The reason that producers would tell us that drinks don’t work on TV is that when you shoot the show like that, which is the way most people shoot it because *those are the excerpts you are getting, consumers are completely lost. Whereas on Rachael Ray, let’s use her as an example, or Jamie Oliver, when they’re cooking a pork chop — and this is the little example that was given to us in the middle of pitching the show — you know what a pork chop tastes like. You may not know what the spices that they are using tastes like, but you have the general idea of what a pork chop tastes like. Then, you start to imagine what a spicy pork chop could be, even if you’re never going to actually taste that dish in your life or what salmon with teriyaki sauce could be? You take the salmon and the teriyaki, and you can somewhat understand it. Also, cooking just in general is much more visual. There’s a lot of things happening. There’s fire, there’s searing. There’s all that shit that you’re doing that’s more fun to watch. There’s action, and we like action. You need to see something happening. Juiced was not that, right? We threw parties, we hung out with people and we talked about people’s backgrounds. It was much more of a “No Reservations” thing. We shot a pilot, and the whole idea behind the pilot was funny. Keith and I were throwing a fun party for our friends at a house that a buddy owned in the Hamptons. Keith and I don’t know anyone in the Hamptons, but you get the behind-the-scenes look on how they’re producing it. They found this house that had this amazing saltwater pool. We actually shipped all of our friends out of the Hamptons. They chartered busses and put them all out there.

Z: Nice.

A: Keith and I were planning for the party, and we wanted to bring some of New York. Of course, when you’re working with people who are based in L.A., what they think of New York is different. They thought, “Yeah, we are going to have you and Keith hailing a taxicab and you’re going to go to the Hamptons in a cab.” I guess this is actually how they make TV, but I didn’t really realize any of these things. Anyway, we go to Astoria first after meeting at Keith’s restaurant thinking about throwing a fun party in the Hamptons. We go to Astoria, and we find Keith’s favorite souvlaki truck. The whole purpose of the episode was high/low, and that’s why they wanted the Hamptons. We get the souvlaki truck and we take it out to the Hamptons. We took the people who own the souvlaki truck wine tasting with us first at two wineries, which was really fun. It was this amazing mother and her daughter, and they’d never been to wineries before, but they loved wine. It was just such a really fun experience to take them.

Z: Now, I need to know if we can find this in the Food Network archive.

A: No, you can’t. It never aired, so I’m going to get there. We shoot all this stuff, and then we go to this party. The whole point of the party is we’re pouring this really great wine, but we’re pouring it out of carafes. No one knows what the wine is. Everyone is interacting with the wine, walking around, and then our friends from the souvlaki truck are making souvlaki for everyone. We were also in this beautiful backyard. We were all having a great time, and everyone’s just hanging out, talking, asking food and wine questions. At the end of the episode, I ask Keith, “What’s the wine?” Then, I bring out these boxes. I said, “You were drinking boxed wine!” Then, Keith jumps into the pool. It was so ridiculous. We then had the fun experience of selling the show, so you take your pilot and your sizzle and you try to sell it. We went to this big conference in D.C. where A&E and Travel Channel are. We met with the producer who had bought “No Reservations” and we wound up getting connected with this really nice guy who was at the Food Network but now I think is at Bravo. He was interested and he said, “We’ll think about airing this. By the way, we have a few shows ahead of you, one of which was called ‘Beer Chicks,’” which I didn’t know what they were thinking.

Z: I mean, “Juiced” sounded good.

A: Every time I think about why beverage has failed on TV, people have some good points, but then they also just *f*cking sh*t the bed with the worst names and the worst ideas. They probably had great personalities that would have been so engaging on television, but they just overdid it because they’re so scared that the beverage is going to fail on TV. This one was hosted by two women who I think at the time were at the iconic restaurant in Los Angeles, Father’s Office, running the beverage program. Father’s Office was well known to have great beer, but the show bombed. They aired it a few times. It never got viewership. Basically, we were told by the producer, “We’re sorry, guys. We tried it, and it didn’t work. We’re not going to take the risk anymore.” That was it. I know people have tried in the past, but we only really think of Stanley Tucci’s show that was really popular in talking about wine. Then, you do see some shows that have these crazy followings like “The Wine Show.” It’s British, and a lot of Americans actually don’t know it.

J: Yeah, I don’t know it.

A: The host is Matthew Rhys.

Z: I think Matthew Goode is his name.

A: Matthew Rhys and Matthew Goode are the two hosts. I love Matthew Rhys because I love “The Americans.”

J: Me too.

A: This show does well because these are very handsome actors who also love wine.

Z: Wait, so you’re telling me that wasn’t the selling point for you and Keith?

A: Look, I like to think that I’m handsome, but I am not an actor. Well, Naomi says I’m handsome.

Z: That’s all that matters.

A: Yeah, and we’re not celebrities. I think that’s why that show works. Also, I think one of the reasons it doesn’t work on TV is because there are too few producers willing to try it. That is my long way of answering your question. Ultimately, it could work, but people are really scared to take the risk.

Z: That’s an interesting thought and one that I had considered. I want to bounce a couple of additional possibilities off the two of you. This comes back a little bit to what you were saying, Adam, about how everyone’s had a pork chop, and everyone can imagine what a pork chop tastes like. Sure, you might not know all the flavors, but you can at least start from somewhere. I think part of it is whether it’s wine, beer, or spirits. There aren’t as many drinks that have that same level of near-ubiquity in people’s lived experience. I think that even goes beyond something else, which is that almost everyone has tried cooking before. Even if it’s something as simple as boxed macaroni and cheese or making French toast, everyone’s at least tried it once in their life. But, a lot of people have never tried to make a cocktail. They have certainly never made beer or wine. The most they’ve possibly done is open a can or a bottle and pour it into the glass. That’s the least interesting thing to watch, so there’s not a lot in that. Even if you’re right, Adam, that producers and networks have not been willing to take many risks with drinks, I do think there is something about how it may be a little harder to connect with people through an experience that they just may not share. I think it’s easy for us as people in this field to forget that people who we think of as relatively sophisticated, never made a cocktail or the most they’ve done is put gin in a glass and add tonic water. It is a great cocktail, but not very challenging. Even making a classic cocktail to create something on the fly feels so outside of their experience that they can’t maybe put themselves in the person doing it on screen’s shoes.

A: Yeah, I think that’s true. I think it’s hard to describe everything that’s happening or what you’re tasting. You mentioned cocktails, and I do wonder if ultimately that is the show that actually could do well.

J: Just consider TikTok and the type of cocktail content on TikTok that has performed well and gotten millions of followers. I wonder if now, after the past year, a drink show could work.

Z: I’ve wondered why SpeedRack, which I know Joanna and Adam are familiar with, but for listeners, it is a cocktail competition that fuses craft cocktail bartending and speed. The competitors are all women, and they have great backstories. It’s super exciting. I’ve been to live competitions in Seattle a number of times, and it always is super engaging. I’ve always been baffled at how there hasn’t been something like that. Of course, it’s not going to be “Top Chef” potentially, but it’s got everything that I think you would want, including a very frantic, visually stimulating thing. Bartending is the one thing in here that really meets some of the same needs that a cooking show does.

A: Totally.

Z: Someone is doing a lot of things. The problem with wine and beer is a lot of times the people are just sitting there sipping and talking. I agree with producers on this point that it can never be the centerpiece of a show. A wine show has to be more of a travel show, more through the lens of wine and in terms of beer, I’m not sure. You could maybe figure out something else. It could quite possibly be about the personalities more than anything else. Again, I bartended, and people would sit there at the bar and thought I was some great bartender. They would sit there at the bar because you are either shaking, straining, or garnishing something. People are captivated because it’s a thing. It doesn’t have to be Tom Cruise in “Cocktail,” flair bartending. Although, that is what brings it back because again, coming back to TikTok, that’s obviously a big part of what you see on there, too. Yet, bartending is the thing that would make sense. I agree that this is probably where I think you’re most right, Adam. No one wants to take a chance, which is a shame because, God knows, every other TV show gets greenlit these days.

A: Totally, I completely agree. I think this is the one thing that would work. If we were to do an amazing cocktail competition show, I think it could slam because there’s a lot of stuff about it that’s really fun. Again, a lot of people do know what rum tastes like. That is going back to my original example where the producer told me almost a decade ago why food works and drinks doesn’t. I think that answers that issue. I also do think that a drinks program could work but focused much more on culture, history, etc. I think exploring parts of America through drinks and combining them with food really works. Even on these food shows, there are very few times when people actually do talk about the drinks, but I think to make it work, it has to come from a much more inclusive place, and it has to be so much less talking about beer and wine — so much less somm-y and cicerone-y. Do you know what I mean? It can’t be about the analysis in the same way. If you’re the person who’s creating the show, you would need to figure out and understand very quickly that a vineyard looks like a vineyard. Even a taproom and things like that, they all look the same, so what is it that you’re doing that’s different? Are you showing more of the town that it exists in and the people and the places? You can walk through someone’s vineyard only so many times before consumers are saying, “Oh, I already saw those other episodes where they’re also in vineyards.” In those vineyards, the grapes were obviously different, but this pretty much is the same experience you’re having at each place. I think that that’s the thing that scared producers so much about wine on television. How much do people want to watch…

J: The same thing over and over again?

A: Yeah, things the professionals get very excited about, but that consumers don’t.

Z: I think you’re 100 percent right. In addition to that, you have to strike a fine balance of wanting to tell interesting and unique stories but also pick things that people can actually go experience. For example, picking wines that people might be able to find. I’m blanking on the exact name, but I remember one of my favorite, random episodes we’ve done, and Adam, you were there, we interviewed the guy on the island in the Venetian Lagoon, and I can’t remember what the name of the winery is.

A: Yeah, it’s Venezia.

Z: Yeah, it was such a fascinating story. And it could’ve been something that would make for a great episode of TV if anyone were ever to do it, except the fact that they make 500 bottles of wine a year. I think it was a really interesting story and this great example of people’s maddening obsession with doing something, even as the sea is fighting you. There’s something majestic in that. Again, it’s a little hard. It’s one thing for our podcast to maybe talk about, but it is another thing for a television show to show this and then tell people, “If you want to get it, great. It’s $100, and you’ll never be able to find a bottle.” You run that difficult balance that I think also with food, some things are very inaccessible because you have to travel somewhere very, very specific to get them. However, the point of wine is that it is a way to travel without leaving your house, which could be a great thing for a show but then the wine has to be at least reasonably accessible to most viewers.

A: I agree. Well, I don’t think we solved the beverage problem on TV, but I think we at least uncovered it.

Z: Seriously, if someone can find the “Juiced” episode… I need this.

A: It exists on a hard drive in my apartment. You’re not posting it.

Z: Naomi, please!

A: No, but Keith will tell you all about it. It was the seed that had us starting to think about VinePair and what this could look like through culture and through beverage.

Z: Joanna, have you been on TV? I mean, actually been on a TV show?

J: I have not, no.

A: She is going to be soon. Get ready.

Z: That sounds like news we will have to reveal some other time.

A: Oh yeah. Joanna and I are going to go shoot a show together in Mexico pretty soon, but everyone will hear about that in the near future. Until then, guys, stay cool. I hope everyone has an amazing Fourth of July weekend. I know those who are listening will be after the Fourth, but for you guys, I hope you both have really lovely times and great barbecues and have delicious drinks. I’ll talk to you next week.

Z: Sounds great.

Thanks so much for listening to the “VinePair Podcast.” If you love this show as much as we love making it, then please give us a rating or review on iTunes, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever it is you get your podcasts. It really helps everyone else discover the show.

Now for the credits. VinePair is produced and recorded in New York City and in Seattle, Wash., by myself and Zach Geballe. He does all the editing and loves to get the credit. Also, I would love to give a special shout-out to my VinePair co-founder, Josh Malin, for helping make all this possible and also to Keith Beavers, VinePair’s tastings director, who is additionally a producer on the show. I also want to, of course, thank every other member of the VinePair team who is instrumental in all of the ideas that go into making the show every week. Thanks so much for listening, and we’ll see you again.

Ed. note: This episode has been edited for length and clarity.

The article VinePair Podcast: TV Loves Food Shows. Why Not Drinks? appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/drinks-tv-shows-podcast/

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douchebagbrainwaves · 3 years

Text

RETURN OF ARTISTS SHIP

And beneath that there's edge-finding, which makes images with definite shapes more engaging than mere blur. Robert and I both knew Lisp well, and nothing changes slower.1 In those countries, people color inside the lines. 7% and we have 11. This is especially true in a startup. Surely one had to force oneself to work on Y Combinator so much. Mostly they crawl off somewhere and die. Alcohol is a dangerous drug, but I'd forgotten why I hated it so much. For some reason, the more a project has to count as research is so narrow that it's unlikely that a project that satisfied that constraint would also satisfy the orthogonal constraint of solving users' problems.

There's more to do than anyone could.2 Knowing how to hack also means that when you have a smaller pool to draw from this is not a bad way to think about the whole experience. We put little weight on the idea. Did they explain the long-term goal of being the market in accommodation the way eBay is in stuff? A startup doing something related to entertainment might want to be using with respect to startup ideas is hard. That's the absent-minded professor, who forgets to shave, or eat some delicious food, than work on hard problems, but necessary. Even tenure is not real freedom.

Prestige is just fossilized inspiration. But you don't regard this time as the prize and the time you spend working as the pain you endure to earn it.3 I like. I didn't mean by this that Java programmers are dumb.4 I have wanted to do things right they should all just move to America. Because they begin by trying to ensure you get some of the hardest questions founders face.5 So I think it can scale all the way down to machine languages, which themselves vary in power. And it's clear why: there are an increasing number of things we need it for. You're getting things done. College is an incomparable opportunity to do that they can't?6 Both took years to succeed.

If not, you're in trouble.7 If there was going to be a property of objects after all. There is something very American about Feynman breaking into safes during the Manhattan Project.8 A lot of people aren't sure what's the top idea in their mind at any given time.9 They're bolder because they know what they're avoiding. I don't want to sell, there's another set of techniques for doing that. Running your own business offers neither.

So if you're ready to clip on that ID badge and go to work. But though it can sometimes be annoying to be surrounded by people who only think about one thing, it's the place to be if that one thing is what you're trying to solve problems where there might not be smart enough to realize this so far. When you're deciding what to do, there's a clear watershed at about age 12, when he got interested in maths. There are many exceptions to this rule. I cooked up this rather grim talk.10 Actors don't face that temptation except in the rare cases where they've written the script, but any speaker does.11 TV for a monitor, which seemed intolerably déclassé to a high-level, we wouldn't need a big development team, so our costs would be lower.12

I don't want to sell your company right now and b you're sufficiently likely to get an offer at an acceptable price.13 It's painful to keep them separate: you have to be one in which the most efficient solutions win, rather than those sponsored by the most influential people. It was the usual story: he'd drop out if it looked like the startup was taking off.14 Because the list of n things, this work is done for you.15 They were mistaken. Entrepreneurship is something you do with a gleeful laugh. In fact, possibility is too weak a word. What's going on? There is a bit of a problem with retirement, though. And if the answer is no, tell them Sorry, but we're not willing to admit that to ourselves, because that's what it means. Sounds like a good plan. Let me mention some things not to do is turn off the filters that usually prevent you from taking one apart to see how it worked.16

Notes

I'm not saying, incidentally, because the outside edges of curves erode faster. Obviously, if you tell them to be employees, or black beans n cubes Knorr beef or vegetable bouillon n teaspoons freshly ground black pepper 3n teaspoons ground cumin n cups dry rice, preferably brown Robert Morris points out that there were about the same way a bibilical literalist is committed to believing anything in particular took bribery to the biggest company of all, economic inequality is really about poverty.

Determination is the accumulator generator in other Lisp dialects: Here's an example of applied empathy. If they were going back to 1970 it would annoy our competitor more if we couldn't decide between turning some investors away and selling more of the VCs buy, because investors don't yet get what they're doing. Seeming like they will only be willing to provide this service, this is an interesting trap founders fall into two categories: those where the richest of their due diligence for VCs. I wonder if they'd like it takes more than determination to create giant companies not seem formidable early on?

People seeking some single thing called wisdom have been in preliterate societies to remember and pass on the critical path that they have to talk about distribution of income and b was popular in Germany told me about a form that asks for your protection.

We didn't let him off, either as an expert—which is the proper test of investor who says he's interested in us!

They say to most people will give you 11% more income, or Seattle, consider moving. Even now it's hard to say that a startup at a time machine, how could I get the rankings they want to trick admissions officers. I started doing research for this purpose are still expensive to start a startup. I'm not saying friends should be easy to read an original book, bearing in mind that it's boring, we found they used FreeBSD and stored their data in files too.

But this seems empirically false.

Why Are We Getting a Divorce? Delivered as if it were Can you pass the salt?

In fact, for the first phase of the year, he was skeptical about things you've written or talked about before, but I have no real substance. Which means if the growth rate to impress investors.

Prose lets you be more alarmed if you don't know yet what they're going to distinguish 1956 from 1957 Studebakers. In many fields a year for a really long time in your own. No one in a startup: Watch people who had been campaigning for the more educated ones come up with much food. The brand of an extensive and often useful discussion on the Internet.

Founders rightly dislike the sort of stepping back is one of those most vocal on the programmers had seen what GUIs had done for desktop computers.

He had such a statement would merely be eccentric.

What makes most suburbs so demoralizing is that in fact they don't know which name will stick. For example, if an employer.

All he's committed to rejecting it. But while such trajectories may be underestimating VCs.

Surely no one can have escaped alive, or at such a low valuation, that must mean you suck. Note: This is not to.

Economic inequality has been in the grave and trying to figure out yet whether you'll succeed. By buzz. But be careful about security.

Family, school, the jet engine, but its inspiration; the point where it does, the partners discriminate against deals that come to accept a particular number. Parker, William R. We didn't let him off, either as an employee as this place was a refinement that made steam engines dramatically more efficient: the editor, written in C and Perl.

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seanhtaylor · 4 years

Text

No Man Is

Dinner at eight. Sex at nine-thirty -- ten at the latest. Depends on the service at Roberto's tonight. If we get that lousy mid-western kid again, it could be as late as eleven before we're out of there. Really, Roberto ought to fire that kid.

Should it be the skimpy red velvet one tonight? Maybe the navy blue leather one -- Warren says I look really sexy in the blue one. What would he know? He'd say I look sexy in any of them. Just play along, that's what he thinks, just play along and feed her a few compliments and he'll get what he wants, all stars are like that. . . Small minds, I get so sick of them.

Another interruption. Just great. I really ought to talk to someone at that answering service. Too many of these things slip through.

"Hey darling. I've got some bad news."

"Really. What? Having trouble matching your bow tie to your socks again?"

"Worse."

"Your polo pony caught something from an undesirable filly and won't stop scratching?"

"Hilarious. You're a regular riot. Now would you please shut up and listen?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Look. Dad's entertaining some Arabs tonight, and one of them has a daughter ready to hit the big three-oh. It's a favor for Dad. Really. She's a tramp, true dog meat. Got nothing on you, sweetheart."

What, no screaming fans at every corner? No number one re-mixes? Dry up and die, Warren.

"Yeah, whatever. Maybe tomorrow night."

"OK. . .Hey, thanks for understanding. Blood's thicker than water, you know."

I hang up, listening to the bath water lap against the sides of the tub while Boots swats at the bubbles. I imagine the same bubbles swimming in my nose, throat, lungs. Boots licking my hand, giving up, and slinking off to the bowl by the refrigerator. Rest. . .

"Here Boots. Let Mommy in. Cats aren't supposed to like water."

Nice night for a walk. Maybe afterwards.

* * * * *

Tramps, all of them. Whatever happened to real heroes? When I was kid, we had the Shadow, Lone Ranger, even Batman and Robin. Now it's these sex-crazed musicians. Self- proclaimed Messiahs for a new generation.

At seven-thirty, I'll call it a night. Been on the corner all day anyway. I'll be back tomorrow morning, shouting and screaming. "Repent! Repent!" It used to be so clear, easy to tell them. Now they can't hear me for all the noise those headphones are pumping into their ears.

Just like Ellis, everyone of them. Not one of them goes by that I don't see a little bit of Ellis in their eyes, hear a little bit of Ellis out of their mouths. Ellis cursed his father, too. Even cursed me on the note he left.

One more show tonight. Gangster rap crowd. They think it's cool. I can tell by the walk.

About four of them. The biggest one's got a knife. He doesn't know I know, but he's got it anyway. Right up against his wallet. Probably a butterfly. That's where Ellis kept his.

"Yo! What's up, old man? Why ain't ya preaching no more? You all out of things to say? Or did you change your mind all of a sudden?"

"Yeah. I got some something real smooth jammin' right now. Real smooth. . .'Ooh baby. . .give me what you got. . .' Wanna hear it?" The short one offers me his headphones.

"Repent!" I say. "Repent! Quit following the gods of that trash you're listening to. 'Thou shalt have no other gods before me.' That's what the Bible says."

"Ain't got no time for the Bible. It don't rhyme."

"Can't dance to it either."

"Listen," I say, "You'll dance soon enough. Dance right on into Hell. Dance forever. No stopping, then. All these zealots of immorality will be dancing with you then. But you can outsmart them. Repent! Repent!"

They don't like what I say. The one with the knife pushes me down. I think each one of them gets a chance to kick me as they go by. That'll hurt in the morning. But bruises heal.

They yell something at me as they run off. I can't hear it clear enough to make it out. The sounds don't separate themselves in my head when the darkness comes in. . .they just mix together. Maybe I'll go in at eight or nine -- whenever I wake up.

Some listen. Some don't. All I can do is all I can do.

* * * * *

I'd turn on the radio, but I get so tired of hearing my songs over and over again. I used to think it was so cool to hear the radio playing something I wrote, something I sang, because I knew then that they thought I was good enough. Now it doesn't matter, and I know it. They'll play any old crap I give them. All it needs is my name on the CD.

Let's see: jeans, raggy t-shirt, Papa's fishing hat, a ski-mask if I had one, and these old Nikes (the old-fashioned ones I bought before the air pumps). Maybe this windy city will be blowing so hard nobody'll notice me. Sometimes a girl needs to be alone. Without the whole crazy world chasing her down like she was wearing a sign that said "A MILLION BUCKS - - JUST CATCH ME TO WIN!"

Wonder if I'll see Warren and that Arabian princess tramp. His Dad does enjoy showing off the city whenever company is in town. Driving down the strip in his stretch limo. Guess he doesn't quite realize that those things are a dime a dozen nowadays. Oh well, Warren wouldn't recognize me if I weren't wearing something kinky anyway. It's a perverted kind of tunnel vision he's got.

Better call George downstairs. See if he can't let me leave by the loading area again. The winos make great company. Don't ask a lot of questions.

"George."

"That you, Miss Diva?"

"Can you sneak me out back again tonight? Last time, I promise."

"For a kiss."

"Don't tempt me, George. Your heart rate alone would kill you. And I wouldn't want that on my conscience. Besides, I might not find anybody else who'd let me use the back door."

"It was worth a try, anyhow. Sure, come on down. You gonna use the service elevator?"

Dear sweet George. I bet he hasn't seen a single one of my videos. He probably wouldn't be so sweet then. Come after me like I was the anti-Christ, jump on that "She's ruining our kids" bandwagon. Thank God Salem was a hundred years ago.

"Yeah. Bought my new album yet?" I hope he's blushing.

"Naw. Not on a security guard's salary. It'd be a little too new for me, anyhow. No Benny Goodman on it. I'll meet you downstairs in a few minutes."

"Thanks, George."

Well, Boots. You up for a little walk down the strip? No? Well, keep an eye on the apartment for Mommy. Wouldn't want to lose anything. On second thought, let someone take it all. It would be a welcome change.

* * * * *

The lights spin like showgirls, rapt in their performance. I try to focus, but the showgirls keep dancing, teasing, taunting, twirling around all glamor and frills.

Something dark that reeks of a night's sweat comes between me and the lights.

"Hey, mon. You ok?"

He's a big black man, close to six-and-a-half feet, no joke. And he's got those long dreadlocks growing like ropes from his scalp. Real unnatural.

"I say, hey mon, are you ok?"

I groggle something out to him, noise mostly, that he at least pretends to understand. He reaches out to help me up, out of the alley.

"Thank you," I say.

"Don't mention it. You need a ride somewhere?"

"No thanks. I live here." As I say it I realize he probably assumes I'm talking about the alley. . .that I'm a boozing, vagrant wino.

"Ok, mon. Take care!"

He's gone before I can correct him.

My watch beeps faintly, one of those cheap twelve dollar made-in-Taiwan kind of beeps, alerting me that it's ten till eight. I always set it ten minutes fast.

The loading bay doors of The Regal open. Probably some college kid carrying out the trash. . . No, it's a rent-a- cop checking the alley. No drugs here, I start to yell to him, just a beat-up old preacher, trying to save a few souls.

After he comes out, he holds the door for this kid who was behind him. Rough looking kid. Faded blue jeans, full of holes, baggy flannel button-up covering an old undershirt, and an ancient fishing hat. Fashion is something I'll never grasp.

The kid kisses the rent-a-cop on the cheek, makes him cross his heart on a whispered promise, and then jumps from the loading dock to the alley. I'm going to assume the best, that the kid is just leaving work from one of the shops downstairs at The Regal, and takes a shortcut home through the alley. Only walks a few feet after the door closes behind the rent-a-cop. Leans against a wall, pulls a pack of cigarettes from the pocket on the front of the flannel shirt, lights a match on the bricks of the wall, and sucks a cigarette like it was a straw. Blows smoke rings, too. Darn good ones.

Ellis used to blow rings, too. He used to try to catch them on his finger, score a point for each one he caught. Scored thirty-eight points once. His room smelled like smoke when his mother and I cut him down. Unfiltered smoke. It made his mother sick. Me, I just ignored it, washed the odor out of my clothes, and threw up later. But first we had to turn that music off.

The kid looks over to me, offers me one.

"No thanks. I like my lungs."

"Suit yourself. Gonna die anyway. Fire's as good as ice, or something like that. I never can remember."

I want to tell this kid to repent. Throw away those smokesticks, and breath the fresh air of Jesus. But I can't -- my lungs and ribs hurt too much. One of the hoodlums must've been wearing pointed shoes.

The kid finishes the smoke, then puffs down two more without missing a beat.

* * * * *

The fresh air smacks against me like a kiss, shooting me up like morphine. No pain. No memories. No anything.

I finish the third stogey, and crunch the butt under the heel of my Nikes. The wino looks at me, still shaking his head after declining my offer of a cig. Well, at least I'm not sleeping in some alley with a bottle of Jack, or whatever guys over sixty-five who live in dirty alleys drink now. I wish he'd stop looking at me that way, accusing. If I wanted that, I could just grab the Lear and fly back to Iowa to Mom and Dad. Even they would hug me first before condemning me.

Maybe that's why I hang on to Warren.

Three to get ready, and four to go, so I light up one more, and start walking out of the alley. The wind has other ideas, lifting Papa's hat, whisking it back over to the wino. He's nice enough, picking it up and knocking the dirt from it. I pop my neck, stretching the muscles, and slide my fingers through my freshly cropped hair. Kind of a long flapper cut. . .it's starting to grow on me. The wind tickles my scalp, triggering the night's rush again.

"Thanks."

He doesn't answer, seems shocked that I'm a girl underneath the street urchin clothes. Oh well, thought I'd made a friend. You win some, you lose some. Nothing new under the sun. I take the hat, tuck my hair back up under it, and head incognito into the street.

Then all Hell breaks loose. The wino starts screaming at me.

"You! You're that high-fashion harlot of music that's running this country's morals into the ground! Diva! My God, what if everybody's little girl grew up to be like you?"

Great. So much for incognito. In just a few seconds, people start gathering like maggots on dead meat. Thanks a lot, old man.

"Taxi! Hey, taxi!"

People, paper, pens. No matter where I look they're all around me. Stupid old preacher. Go ruin somebody else's night. I've got enough problems.

"Hey, everybody! Look! It's Diva!"

"I think you're great."

"Can I have your autograph? It's for my cousin."

I wonder if this is what a lab rat feels like, having to push all the right buttons while the guys in glasses and white coats stand around and watch. Only, now the glass between me and the crowd has been removed, and they're squeezing in, huddling in tighter to touch me, pull me apart, get a piece of me, carry me home as a souvenir -- "The Night I Touched Diva!"

"Taxi!"

"Please, just a few autographs."

Can't think. Can't feel the night air. Won't you please leave me alone. You don't want me. . . you want Diva. I'm not Diva. I'm not Diva. I'm. . . My God, who am I?

"Sure, just a few. Anything for my fans."

A blur of yellow rescues me. I fall inside less than gracefully. In the back seat, I cup my hands to hide my face.

* * * * *

My God, Ellis. Is this what you saw when the floor danced beneath you?

The attention she commands. The worship she craves. A pimp in black leather selling sex to children. And once they're hooked, they beg for more. Not one kid in the crowd is older than eighteen. Most look at least thirty, padded and curved, showing off the adultness of their bodies. But they're children. And begging at her feet like pets, ready to play.

"Repent! Repent!" I say, but I know they can't hear. All I can do is all I can do.

My sermon gets lost in the thunder they give her. Try as I might, I can do nothing here. God forgive them for they know not what they do. If anyone causes one Your little ones to stumble, oh Lord, have mercy. . .

A cab sweeps in, screeching recklessly next to the curb. She crawls in, bowing first to soak in their praise. The yellow door slams behind her, and the cab screams off.

It takes a good fifteen minutes for the crowd to fully disperse. Most of them linger, trading stories of how close they got, what her clothes felt like. Two girls in the front lie on the sidewalk, passed out. I guess they actually touched her.

Might as well get a cup of coffee before going home. Henry's place is only two blocks away. Let the commotion die down a little.

When I enter, the smell of hot coffee is solid like a wall. Just being here cheers me up, even makes my side feel better. Sid and Gladys wave, ask me for a soul count. Marty looks up, nods, then looks away, finishing his grilled cheese and Maxwell House. Two drunks are passed out in the corner booth. I stuff a Gideon New Testament in each one's shirt pocket, and order them each an omelet plate and some fresh coffee for when they wake up. Henry will see that they get it.

"Here's twenty bucks. It'll get them each a night at the shelter," I say to Henry as I sit down, "Don't let them have it till after I leave."

He takes the money. "The last two blew it on more liquor. What makes you think these two won't?"

"Just got a feeling this time, Henry."

"You had a feeling last time."

He's right. Most of them drink it all away. Probably end up right back in the corner booth, drunk and passed out. Some don't.

"Didja hear the news, Wilson? About Diva's new album being banned in two stores in Mississippi?" Henry asks me. And as he does, I remember the color of her eyes when I handed her the cap, deep brown like Ellis', before they dulled from drugs.

"Well, preacher, didja hear me? Diva's new album was banned from two stores in Mississippi."

I ignore him as much as I can. "Ham and cheese omelet. Grits and toast, too."

"Bet those libs'll be making a stink about their first amendment rights again. Yes sir, this time it's got the smell of a lawsuit all over it."

Henry keeps talking to me, but the words get lost somewhere between us. Eventually, he gives me the omelet plate, and I join the two drunks at the corner booth. One stirs as I sit, shows me a picture of his wife, then passes out again. My watch lets me know it's ten till nine.

#Sean Taylor #short story #Gomer and other Early Works #No Man Is

0 notes

iseutz · 7 years

Text

Chapter three

I don’t know if you ever owned a first generation cell phone. They were huge. Mine was a Motorola with a pull-out antenna; it was as big as an intercom receiver and its ringtone was deafening. It made us jump on our seats and pull from each like we were caught red-handed. I glanced at the dashboard clock as I frantically rummaged through my belongings in my bag: 8.05. Late enough for my mother to start panicking.

-Mom? Yes, I’m coming. No, I’m almost there, but it’s raining and there’s been an accident on the road… no, mom… mom, I’m fine. I just had to wait until they cleared the road. Of course I stopped the bike to answer to you. Yes. Yes. Mom, the sooner you hang up, the sooner I will be home. Ok? Ok, laters.

-Wow – Julian said. – That was a nice save… or not?

-Damn! Damn! I was such a moron! – I was punching the air in frustration. –Why did I come up with the accident bullshit?

-Because you are late and needed a good excuse?

-I told her I’m on my bike!

-Oh.

-What am I gonna do now? Even if they don’t notice tonight, how am I supposed to get to school tomorrow? They will find out for sure!

-Ok, don’t panic- he took me by my shoulders and made me turn towards him. – It’s gonna be fine: I will drive you home, then I will go back to my house, take your bike, shove it in the back of the car and park it at your place. Easy-peasy.

-No way. I cannot ask you-

-You’re not asking, in fact: it’s my idea. And it was my fault: I have torn you from your family to force you onto alcoholism… except it was my family and you ripped the beer from my helpless hands.

I couldn’t help but smile. –Thank you, that’s… thank you.

-Forget it. Now, how far are we from your place?

-A couple of minutes, more or less.

-Good. Because now – he wiggled his eyebrows at me. –We need to soak you up.

-Come again?!? – My ears were probably glowing red by that moment.

-You cannot go home nice and dry after supposedly spending that much time in the rain – he replied, fumbling with a handful of CDs. – Don’t worry, I’ll keep you company. But we need a proper soundtrack… ah, there you are – he inserted the CD and selected a track, then he jumped out of the car.

Hey, hey, hey, hey Ooh who…

I watched him get around the car and come to open the car door on my side with a bow.

Won't you come see about me? I'll be alone, dancing you know it baby

-Julian, what-

-Shhh. Come out and dance – he jumped a step away and spun, water sprinkling from his fanning coat. I crawled halfway out of the car.

-Simple Minds? Really?

-You sure are stiff for someone so young- he reached for my hands and pulled me out. –There’s no better song for dancing in the rain! – The storm was so loud we had to scream against it. – Apart from Singing in the Rain. And I left that record home – he made me pirouette under his raised arm, steading me with one hand as I clumsily tried to maintain balance. Julian wasn’t much of a dancer, but he was graceful in an oscillating way. Me, not even that, but I put effort nevertheless, stomping my feet in puddles, spreading my arms under the deluge.

-Why are we doing this, again?

-Oh – he answered, flipping wet hair from his forehead. – Because we are young and we believe we’ll never die. But mostly because you need to look wet and this is more funny than simply stand and wait. Ready? Here comes the grand finale! - He put a hand on my back, grabbed my right wrist with the other and dipped me so low my ponytail brushed the ground. I squealed and he laughed as the music faded out.

Then he pulled me up, of course, against his chest and all noises faded under the rumble in my ears. The hand on my back slid around my waist, his arm enclosing me. My eyes were at the level of his collarbone; I saw his throat pulsating as he swallowed. I tried to look confident as I found his gaze. He smiled slowly, reading my bluff. He was handsome, towering over me, hair slicked back by the rain. He let go of my wrist, brushing a finger up to my neck; a little electric shock followed the trail. The car stereo played a song I didn’t know as his long hands cupped my face once again and I closed my eyes, clutching at his t-shirt.

His lips touched mine for just a second: -First time? – He whispered against my mouth.

-First time – I confirmed. He smiled; I felt it.

-I’m honored.

He was a sweet kisser; then he was a passionate kisser; then, an exigent kisser. He gently leaned my head back to ease into the kiss, his tongue soft and his breath smoky as mine; he sucked my tongue in his mouth as if it was delicious and my legs turned into hot jelly. I clung onto his shoulders to keep from falling, from drowning, from dying and he pulled me close, bending because he was so tall. He licked lightly my upper lip as I gasped for air and sealed it with a peck.

-Little raccoon - he smiled.- You can come to rummage through my garbage anytime you want.

-I… am so wet! – I blurted out and regretted immediately. Julian burst out laughing. He gestured me to get back in the car while I blabbered about the rain to regain some pride, in vain.

We didn’t talk much on the way home; it didn’t take long, anyway, and it’s not easy to casually make eye contact with a man who literally turns a blind eye at you. He drove humming to the music playing, a small smile on his lips. I made him pull over before my house, in case my father was surveilling the driveway from the window; it wouldn’t have been the first time.

-Here we are, then. Go. Run home before you catch a cold, I’ll bring the bike in no time.

I gave him the keys to the locket. – Thank you. And… be careful.

-Never- he grinned. – And it’s been a pleasure.

I picked up my bag from the car’s floor. Kiss me, I kept thinking. Kiss me once more, kiss me goodbye, just… kiss me again.

-Selendri.

I turned, heart racing, but he was just lending me a packet of chewing gums.

-Oh, thank you – I took one. –Uhm, where can I throw away the envelope?

He took it from my hand. Then, he took my hand.

-Come here.

And then I was in his arms, both of us frozen and drenched in water and his mouth found mine, a thin gleam of white teeth showing below his lip. I sucked at that lip like he had done with mine, I licked underneath, where the skin was unbearably smooth; he bit my lip and I buried my hands in his hair. He did the same and pulled gently away from me.

-Not enough time for a proper goodbye. You have to go, and I have a bike to deliver.

#fanfiction #fan fiction #the arcana #the arcana game #fluff #julian devorak #selendri #julian x mc

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dndfuckhouse · 4 years

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CuriousCat Archive

A series of Q&A’s that were sent onto the group curiouscat, now imported here for readability and easy editing :y

Q - would psalm suck toes? y/n

Psalm: When would I ev-? Actually, never mind. The answer is no, of course not.

Q - Does Amos only eat cheese...

Keva: he takes when he can get

Q - plum you ever smoke weed before just curious

Plum: NO NEVER SMOKED BEFORE

Q - Han what is your hair care routine

Han: well its less mine and more a friend of mine's... they just gave me some gooey stuff that smells real nice and told me to use it once a week!! i dont know what to do about the growing black roots tho..... :(

Q - mister finn have u ever kissed before...

Finn: T-thats a very personal question! How rude... I've done it once, of course.

Q - han, would you drink with finn again? are you two getting closer?

Han: ...its easier to get close the more drunk we get so ye....

Q - Han, whats your favourite liquor? -Finn

Han: THE FASTER IT GETS ME DRUNK THE BETTER !!!!!!

Q - Psalm, do you believe in fate?

Psalm: Fate is a very romantic notion, and in the past I probably would've said no. Right now I have no choice but to believe in it, I think.

Q - on a scale of 1 to 10 han how much did you enjoy your fight with psalm (the one from the rp channel)

Han: ONE!!!!!! IM GLAD HE ACCEPTED BUT I DIDNT FUCKING WIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but ill win next time watch out psalm this tiger is OUT FOR BLOOD Psalm: :psalmface:

Q - on a scale of one to ten how much did PSALM enjoy his fight with han !

Psalm: It was enjoyable because I won, although I was hoping it'd last a bit longer. 7. :psalmface:

Q - WHATS FINNS FAVOURITE LIQUOR!!!!!!

Finn: Classy red wine!

Q - rokka what do you think about your street performance career? do u have any ambitions?!

Rokka: IT’S FUN! I enjoy watching people's amazed faces especially the children. Ambitions...? Maybe? *rokka falls into thinking man pose for a very long time*

Q - Rokka, how do you keep your fur so soft and pretty? -Finn

Rokka: ⭐STEPS TO ROKKA'S FUR CARE !!!!!! ⭐ 1) bathe in lakes! or rivers! (I personally like lakes hehe) 2) SHAKE IT DRY! shakeshakeshake (be careful of dizziness!!) 3) lick palms and smooth down ur fur. (this is the secret) 4) DONE! (congrats u have nice fur!!!!!!!)

Q - What was your first kiss like finn?

Finn: Thats a little secret between me and god.

Q - :):(

Rokka: who are you and what does this mean Psalm: It's a secret code. Why not try deciphering it?

Q - finn whats your favourite blood type? pls and thx

Finn: I'm usually not open about this, but I only consume animal blood. I dont have a favourite. Beef based strikes me as the least worst so far.

Q - psalm does it hurt to cough up smoke? how bothered are you by it?

Psalm: I wouldn't say it hurts, but it feels about as pleasant as you'd imagine coughing up smoke would feel, which is to say, not pleasant at all. It mostly just makes it hard to breath, but considering the reason it happens I'm not sure I'm allowed to complain. I'd rather not take my chances.

It does bother me though.

Q - keva, do you prefer being alone or with friends?

Keva: friends

Q - keva, whats your favourite food?

Keva: roasted quail

Q - Does plum always text in all caps? Do they do that to show all their suppressed anger

Plum: does it seem suppressed.... DOES IT SEEM SUPPRESSE

Q - plum, why did you decide to go to the ball as a guest with vinny? did you think it was better cover than being a guard?

Plum: just didnt think id be much use as a bodyguard also i wanted to dress up...

Q - to everyone: would you fuck on the first date ? 🤔

Han: i only fuck on the first date Psalm: No. Finn: What is it with these rude questions? Rokka: UHHHHHHH---? WH=HAHA WHAT? Keva: no Plum: what the fuck Cimmorro: i’ve never, but i don’t see why not if we liked each other enough. i’ve to say i’m difficult to impress on the first day gyahaha

Q - actually to everyone, whats your favourite food?

Psalm: There's a dish back in my hometown that we'd eat on holidays called “Smelt and Salt". Most travellers tend to find it salty to the point of being inedible, but I think its delicious. Finn: The servants at our residence are quite skilled, I enjoyed almost everything they make. When I was alive, I favored simple chicken breast with baked vegetables though. Rokka: Nothing can go wrong with a big ol' pot of beef and potato stew! I love soups Han: we dont get a lot of fruit way south so i was so surprised when i saw lots of it at shorewater!!!!! ITS SO SWEET AND DELICIOUS!!!!!!!!!! Plum: theres this stew that my whole family comes together to make for special occasions and we put a lot of roots and flowers and vegetables in it its pretty good. havent had it in a while

Q - *like a kpop interviewer* to everyone: so what would your ideal partner be like? >:3c

Han: if they can dish out as much as they can take Psalm: Someone who is fun to be around. Loyalty is nice too. Finn: Someone who can handle me and is genuinely interested in all facets of my life. Rokka: Someone who can enjoy the world with me especially nature. Accept me! P.S. Psalm, I am fun and loyal........ :pleading: Plum: uhhh... someone kind i guess Keva: (visibly uncomfortable and unwilling to answer) Cimmorro: honest and devoted. someone who is easygoing would be a nice addition.

Q - WHY DO YOU FUCKERS NEVER PUT DOWN THE FUCKING TOILET SEAT IN THIS HOUSE!! SOME OF US ARE SMALL IN SIZE AND KEEP FUCKING FALLING IN

Psalm: Not saying I'm the culprit, but you honestly could just check first. Rokka: I always try to remember to put it down! Although, I may or may not have forgotten once......................or 10 times.................................. Keva: you're tall enough to look before you sit

Q - Rokka, don't forget you owe me a drink the next time we find a tavern. - Psalm

Rokka: you got it, boss! but........can we have round 2.........please...........please.............................please.............please............................plea--[commercials cues]

Q - birthdays? birthdays?

Psalm: My birthday is on the 8th of Solstitium. Plum: 32nd of soltrice Keva: (briefly crinkles nose and doesn't answer) Han: i dont know! no one in my tribe kept track of things like that. judging by stories i think it during elfons? Rokka: hibernon, solvo 74! Cimmorro: 55th of umbrois. i’m expecting presents now that you all know!

Q - favourite season

Psalm: Aestas. It's a bit silly, but my birthday falls around this time so I've always been rather fond of it. Keva: elfons Plum: elfons Rokka: Elfons! where the grass is greenies Han: elfons... i like it when it goes from cold to warmer temperatures :) Cimmorro: rahtumna.

Q - before making a call (over sending stone or message or whatever) do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? why?

Psalm: Depending on the circumstances, yes. Rokka: No need to think when speaking. Cimmorro: depends if there are specific people i’m contacting. i generally don’t really care though.

Q - if you could be anything job-wise and nothing could hold you back, what would you want to be?

Psalm: I've never really given that much thought. I don't really make any grand plans for myself, as they tend to go awry fairly often. I think I'd enjoy writing plays...perhaps. Keva: don't know, never thought about it Rokka: I've also never thought about this <:9 Han: ah... i would like to travel again... Cimmorro: i like the way things are right now. [mumbling] if anything, i’m more worried about losing it...

Q - what would be a "perfect" day for you?

Psalm: I enjoy plays quite a bit, so if I could spend an entire day watching a good series of performances I'd be quite happy. Some good company wouldn't hurt either. (As long as they don't talk.) Keva, after thinking for so long it seems like she's not going to answer: being home with nothing important to do Plum: I JUST WANT TO GO HOME Rokka: running through a grassy land and bask in the sun (๑￫ܫ￩)

Q - when did you last sing to yourself? to someone else?

Psalm: My singing voice is rather unpleasant, so I don't do it often. Keva: a month ago? i guess? who would even keep track Rokka: I like to sing every time I bathe! rubba dub dub rubba doot doot rubba dee dee its nothing but a squeaky clean me!!!!!!!!!! Han: (flushes) it was a while back Cimmorro: i was part of the choir in my childhood. i was pretty okay! can’t say the same for the present though ahahaha

Q - what was the last dream you remember?

Psalm: I'd rather not say. Keva: (doesn't answer) Rokka: *thinking face*

Q - toilet paper over or under?

Psalm: Over? I'm not an animal. Plum: what.... the fuck is this asking Rokka: Is there a difference...?

Q - if you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

Plum: ...... [plum is starting to look uncomfortable] Keva: (laughs, doesn't answer) Psalm: I'm perfectly fine with how I was raised. Han: (laughs) oh, throw the whole thing out Rokka: nice answers everyone. NEXT QUESTION! :D Cimmorro: wait, hmm… not so much on the way of raising but more on a certain part of the situation, i suppose?

Q - what is your most terrible memory?

Psalm: *Looks somewhat distressed.* Plum: THIS IS MAKING ME ANGRY. IM NOT ANSWERING ANYMORE OF THESE TONIGHT. Rokka: please stop asking these questions you're making my friends upset. This is upsetting.

Q - is there something you've dreamed about doing for a long time? why haven't you done it?

Psalm: I wouldn't say for a long time, but I haven't done it because I can't. Simple as that. Keva: can't anymore Rokka: Life hands you lemons so you gotta eat them. *nods* （￣ー￣） Han: i wanted to learn singing. why... well. life doesn't work sometimes. Cimmorro: when i was a child, i dreamed of being at the top of the clergy’s hierarchy. then that immediately got crushed when i was told that only women were allowed to lead the church bahahaha! that was back then. right now i’m satisfied with my position and still have much to learn. but if the opportunity arises and i meet the requirements, i wouldn’t say no to seating as the high mother.

Q - if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

Psalm: I'm torn between knowing the truth about one thing from the past, and a very selfish glimpse into the future. Keva: (doesn't answer, but seems to think about the question) Rokka: *vibrates* Han: there are so many things i want answers for, i dont think i could choose. Cimmorro: [visibly cringing as several things come to mind]

Q - of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? why?

Psalm: Lots of morbid questions here. I'll pass on this one. Keva: orin Rokka: please i'm begging you..............please stop with these questions...... Cimmorro: … [quitely glances at how the others respond instead of answering]

Q - how close and warm is your family? do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?

Han: (laughter that becomes progressively louder in volume) Psalm: I quite enjoyed my childhood, but given the reactions of the others it seems I might be the only one fortunate enough to be able to say that... Keva: i liked a part of it Plum: dont know what the fuck psalm is talking about. ive had the happiest childhood a halfling could have thank you i wish i could be back home right now, actually Rokka: it had its up and downs. i mean, who doesn't!! Cimmorro: [laughs] i think mine is seen as particularly “strange” by most people, but i personally have enjoyed it regardless.

Q - how do you feel about your relationship to your primary caregiver growing up?

Psalm: At the moment, I'd say its rather complicated on my part. I'm ashamed to say why. Keva: i don't Han: *looks visibly sick for a second* ... poorly :) Plum: as in my mom and pop? i love those two Rokka: Tough love? Finn: Cold. Cimmorro: [beaming] grateful! i love em! would do anything to treat them at least even half as much as they’ve treated me.

Q - what roles do love and affection play in your life?

Psalm: I just LOVE to be AFFECTIONATE with people, so I'd say quite a large one :psalmface:. Rokka: i got to befriend han! and finn! Also, psalm it's not good to lie to the people. Finn: R-rokka I'm touched... Right now, love and affection couldn't be further removed from my life but hopefully one day, they'll play a bigger role for me. Han: (shrugs) i like having sex Cimmorro: i take pride in making sure that people who are important to me know that they are. it’s also the way they have treated me.

Q - for what in life do you feel most grateful for?

Psalm: ...Well I made it to Shorewater somehow. Rokka: meeting Han! Han: *was about to say something different but is so touched by rokka* dude......really? q_q me too dude.... Finn: My uncle. But recently I've made some good friends, I feel... Cimmorro: the goddess’ guidance.

Q - what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

Psalm: I- . Hm. For now, let's say it was beating Rokka at stone, parchment, shears. Keva: i'm here Rokka: PSALM PLEASE ROUND 2 Finn: So far I have nothing to my name, but that might change soon. I pray it will.

Q - if you were to die this evening with opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? why haven't you told them yet?

Psalm: Where I hid my buried treasure. Han: i wont die. Psalm: I like that answer. Rokka: Why are you like this, anon? Finn: I'd want to talk to Orin one last time.

Q - share an embarrassing moment from your life

Psalm: I fumbled a joke I was trying to make with Finn the other day. I won't go any further into the past than that, thanks. Finn: Ah, so it was a joke? Please don't worry about it Psalm. Rokka: nearly burning my friends alive because I sneezed. :(

Q - what's your favourite weapon and why

Psalm: For reasons I won't disclose let's just say I'm not very fond of weapons, my current one in particular. :psalmface: Spells are more useful. Keva: daggers, easy to carry around and hide Rokka: I guess my scimitars? They can cut plants and meat well so i can (try to) cook! Finn: I love swords!! All swords! (he sparkles with excitement) Han: i like being close and personal with someone but also enjoy the quiet rush of hitting a target from a bow Cimmorro: i use a dagger but if i had a spear or an axe that would be kinda awesome actually.

Q - questions to fall in love here we go! 1) if you could invite anyone in the world to dinner, who would it be?

Psalm: ...I have a friend I haven't seen in a while, so I suppose I'd invite him. Keva: do they have to be alive Psalm: I was wondering the same thing. Plum: i would want to eat dinner with my whole village but if its only one person then my sister. dont really like going to dinner one on on if i can help it but maybe thats something halflings dont like because theyre not antisocial bastards Rokka: Do I HAVE to pick one? :( Finn: ... Rokka! I'd love to dine with everyone though. Han: oh, maybe aster? or ferrie chris? or uhh... (Han starts to look bashful and stops answering) Cimmorro: willow.

Q - if you all were on a boat (lmao) and it was sinking and you could only save one person from the party who would it be

Plum: rokka or finn but i wouldnt be on a fucking boat if i could help it Psalm: Plum, as they are arguably the only one I could carry. Oh, and Finn I suppose. Plum: WOW THANK YOU THOUGH YOUD PROBABLY SINK LIKE A STONE Keva: finn Finn: T-thank you all... (blushes and gets too distracted to answer) Rokka: This question is stressing me out. I'm stressed. This is stressful. Han: myself? is this trick question Cimmorro: myself so i can do this: [casts water walk] don’t worry bros i got this

Q - complete this sentence. "i wish i had someone with whom i could share..."

Psalm: I have nothing to share. Rokka: ...this drink with! (psalm, round 2 please) Finn: my fate. Han: my past, without fear

Q - what, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

Psalm: I'd say death, but ha. Rokka: what roomie said Finn: I don't like jokes about my family and especially my uncle. Cimmorro: Wee Jas.

Q - when did you last cry in front of another person? by yourself?

Psalm: I haven't cried since I was a kid. Rokka: can we have more fun questions please :( Finn: I rarely ever cry. But last time I did, I was comforted by someone precious. Han: oh that was... (han becomes embarrassed) it is stupid Cimmorro: [wearily looks over where ezra is currently sitting across the room]

Q - do you have a secret hunch about how you're going to die

Plum: i wouldnt say secret but yes Psalm: Ugh. Keva: had a few, anything goes now i guess Rokka: why would you ask this? I don't like this question. :( Finn: Not just a hunch. Han: i won't die!!! what's with these questions Cimmorro: nothing in particular. i just hope that it will be by the goddess’ fates.

Q - fmk vinny cole ezra

Psalm: (What kind of agenda is this?) F - Vinny, M - Cole, K - Ezra. Keva: fuck ezra marry cole kill vinny Psalm: Ah Keva, finishing your doppelganger's job for her I see. That's a bit harsh. Keva: (lifts her hands in a halfhearted shrug) Rokka: Friend: cole, Meet: Vinny, K....klean for ezra......................... (in the periphery of the shot keva stares into the camera for the entirety of rokka's response) Han: fuck ezra marry cole kill vinny Finn: Who are these people? What is "fmk"? Cimmorro: f-vinny, m-cole, k-ezra

Q - Everyone, where would you like to visit someday?

Psalm: I'm not really one for traveling but since we seem to be headed there already, Vargonia sounds interesting. There's probably a lot to do there. Rokka: I like open land so anywhere with one? Finn: Sharrif!! If I wasn't dutybound at home I'd love to move there. Keva: never thought about it Han: oh oh oh! some guy passed the inn and said there are mountains that reach into another PLANE in sonnate!!! i wanna go there!!!!!! Cimmorro: i’d like to see the arcane well myself heehee

Q - what's your earliest memory? is this too spoilery idk i'm shooting my shot

Psalm: I'm pretty sure it was when my mother dropped me into the ocean by accident. Why I have no fear of swimming because of this has yet to reveal itself to me. Plum: i remember........ bumping into the kitchen table when i was younger and something might've been a rolling pin hitting me on the head and then fucking crying obviously and my parents swinging me around Rokka: I remember seeing a little bug flying around and chasing it all around so that I could tell them I thought they looked cute.....I was too small to reach the little bug on the tree though haha Keva: i don't remember her name Finn: Playing with my cousins, surrounded by our family. Han: being held by big, heavy hands. close to the chest. Cimmorro: falling off a cliff lol

Q - i had assumed psalms arcane power was new to him but is it actually?

Psalm: An interesting assumption. I'd love to know why you think so.

Q - PSALM ROUND 2 PLEASE - rokka

Psalm: I'll think about it.

Q - how do you sleep the best?

Rokka: laying sprawled on my back is the best! Sometimes fetal. Finn: I actually... do enjoy sleeping in my coffin. So in confined spaces I suppose. Sharing a bed with Rokka was very comfortable too. (Rokka self-fives himself in the bg) Psalm: Having horns makes sleeping on my back a bit of an issue, but they sit just on top of my head enough for me to sleep reasonably well on my side. Cimmorro: i don’t remember anymore… can’t say i’ve slept very well the last few years

Q - what was your mode of travel to shorewater?

Rokka: mode..? Oh, hard mode! Finn: Hard mode? Keva: (looks at the camera) Psalm: Boat. Han: foot, the odd cart here and there. Cimmorro: i stayed on land as much as possible through various modes.

Q - around what time do you prefer to eat dinner?

Rokka: any time is good in my book! Keva: late enough to not be hungry before i sleep Finn: .................. Psalm: Early evening? I've never given it much thought.

Q - if you knew in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you're living? why?

Psalm: My life right now is not something that is within my ability to change. Rokka: Same as roomie here...I don't think I want to be falsely accused of murder... Cimmorro: … no. i’ll just have to keep trying until such time comes.

Q - what’s your typical bed time? any routines?

Rokka: Never too late! I like to do some quick stretches after a long day for a good nights rest! Most of the time I just plop down lol Finn: I like to stay up past sunrise actually. Psalm: No. I usually go right to sleep. Preferably as early as possible since I don't like being tired. Cimmorro: i try to keep a strict and healthy routine but [sigh]

Q - what's something you might like for (insert gift-giving custom for holiday equivalent here)?

Finn: Jewellery and swords. Psalm: A good book would be nice. I also like masks. Rokka: I'll like anything as long as it came from their heart! Just the idea of them thinking about me warms me up. Cimmorro: same as rokka.

Q - how do you stay fit?

Rokka: 250 Push-ups, 250 Yard Handwalk, Jump Rope- 2000 Times, 250 Straight Punches to Heavy Bag, 250 Roundhouse Kicks to Heavy Bag, annnnnd 500 Squats. Finn: Thats quite impressive Rokka: ... (Rokka salutes) Psalm: I wouldn't say I'm the most physically fit man out there. (8 STR) Cimmorro: morning walks, maybe even jogs, if i’ve got the time to spare… which is almost never. does carrying stacks of books count?

Q - to everyone: do you like anime

Rokka: what's anime? :0 Psalm: ...Animals? They're alright. I like small ones, like puppies, kittens, chicks etc. Finn: If you've seen Promare, please DM me.

Q - do you prefer meat or veggies

Rokka: meat......but veggies are good too.......can I pick both? Psalm: Meat. Finn: Meat as well. Han: meeeeeat Cimmorro: i find it difficult to enjoy a meal without having both.

Q - what is your most treasured memory

Psalm: :psalmface: Rokka: :) Finn: ^___^ Han: (Han thinks briefly and then blushes, embarrassed)

Q - how do you feel about physical touch? yea? nay?

Finn: I dont experience much of it but I enjoy it when I do. Keva: depends Psalm: I prefer to keep to myself. Rokka: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *hugs Psalm* Psalm: *Sighs* Han: (shrugs) everyone was always touching me, so am used to it. Cimmorro: big no! unless we’re close, don’t touch me.

Q - what does friendship mean to you?

Psalm: God is that you? Rokka: Everything! Psalm, is God your friend? Psalm: *suddenly regretting his answer*

Q - coffee or tea?

Rokka: TEA! Psalm: I'm not particularly fond of either, but if I had to pick, tea. Finn: Tea! What kind do you favor Psalm? Psalm: Chamomile or mint, depending on what's available. And yourself? Finn: Oh, I quite like that one too. My favourite is Rose Petal Blend though, perhaps we could share a cup- *remembers vampirism* Ah- perhaps I could have... a cup of blood if it doesnt disgust you. Psalm: That wouldn't disgust me at all. Just pick a day. Finn: *crying cat* Keva: never had coffee Cimmorro: coffee. though one of my parents often share their special tea brew with me in the afternoons or long nights of work. it’s pretty much the only kind of tea i like… i miss it.

Q - what's a favourite feature of yourself? can be external or internal, or both

Finn: I took good care of my hair before I became undead. So my hair would've been it. Psalm: Regarding physical traits...my mother and I have identical eyes and horns. Mum found it cute, so I guess I grew up being somewhat fond as well... Interal, I don't self reflect that often. I'll leave that unanswered. Rokka: I like my blue fur! and eyes! Keva: (shrugs) don't think about that sorta thing Han: (Han becomes increasingly despondent the more she thinks) none is good enough. i need to be better. Cimmorro: my cleric magic!!!!!!!!! \\\\o//// i also like my hair and tail a lot!

Q - what’s something you used to be afraid of as a kid?

Finn: My aunt was quite scary haha. Psalm: When my mother got mad at me... Rokka: Loud noises Keva: throwing up Cimmorro: oh i used to see a shadow of a demon in my quarters quite often for a few years. freaked me out a lot of times but i believe lady wee jas protected me since that demon never did come to harm me at all. :D

Q - do you know the muffin man?

Rokka: The muffin man..? Finn: The muffin man... I would like to meet him. Keva: what

Q - what’s your preferred weather

Rokka: Sunny! but with a nice breeze! (≧▽≦) Finn: I dislike rain, but fog can be nice to watch. Since I only operate at night now clear weather is preferred. Psalm: I like sunny weather, but rainy days are nice when I don't have to be outside. Keva: warm and clear Cimmorro: same as psalm.

Q - are you an early riser or late sleeper?

Rokka: EARLY WOLF CATCHES THE DEER Psalm: Depends on when I need to get up. Keva: depends Cimmorro: both…. 🤦‍♂️

Q - what are your feelings on pda

Rokka: What's "peh-dah"? Psalm: I have no problem with it, although I dislike drawing attention to myself, so then again... Cimmorro: depends, but especially dislike it during work.

Q - what’s your best “my coworkers are crazy” story?

Rokka: (nervously glances back at everyone) Um...Uh...Haha (forced smile) Keva: (doesn't break eye contact with the camera as she gestures at the rest of the party) Psalm: I was partnered with a friend once for a... well a thing that we had to do, and he somehow managed to gamble away all of his clothing. Cimmorro: all of this right now

Q - what's your favourite type of bread

Keva: bread Rokka: Any is good! Psalm: Croissants are nice. Cimmorro: any as long as it’s fresh out of the oven.

Q - when was the last time you laughed so hard it was hard to stop? what was so funny?

Psalm: Refer to the "coworker" answer.

Q - guilty pleasures?

Psalm: I like to read poetry. I only feel guilty about it because a friend of mine said it made me seem too brooding, and now I'm a bit self conscious Cimmorro: playing pranks on my coworkers during break

Q - are you still in touch with friends from your childhood?

Keva: some of them Rokka: I wish I could say that Psalm: Not for a couple months now, no. Finn: Yes! My friend Sagessa and I are penpals, so even if we're far apart we can always talk!! Han: (han shakes her head dejectedly) Cimmorro: mhm

Q - who's someone interesting you met recently

Rokka: Finn!!!!! He can turn into things! so cool Psalm: I would also have say Finn, as I'd never met a vampire before now. Not to say the rest of you aren't interesting enough. Finn: *turns into a bat and hangs himself upside down from Rokka's shoulder* Han: (han looks around warily) (whispers) psalm BUT DONT TELL HIM THAT!!!! what is that guys DEAL Cimmorro: i agree about finn

Q - what's the best day you've had recently?

Rokka: Hard to say with whats been happening Psalm: "Recently" is a bit of a stretch. Finn: I had a good time at the ball with Orin! Cimmorro: the king consort accepting my offer was cool and exciting. feel like i haven’t had a normal job in years with how long these weeks have been going pffff

Q - do you have siblings

Psalm: It's entirely within the realm of possibility, but none that I'd ever care to meet. Keva: don't know Han: yes Cimmorro: in a way, yes

Q - how important is fashion to you

Finn: If I dont look good whats the point of anything. Psalm: Not very. Keva: it's not Rokka: Somewhat? I just bought my first and only shirt ever!! that's pretty fashionable of myself if you asked me. B) Han: (gets bashful) there are some cute dresses i see around town but... :wiwi: Cimmorro: [gestures at all of himself] :-)

Q - do you have any personal belongings that you would feel upset about losing? what are they?

Psalm: No, I've never really had any attachment to material things. I suppose there is this dagger I've picked up recently that has served some use, so maybe that...maybe. Finn: My earrings or my sword. I cherish them. Han: yeah. some weapons i have were made by uuh. a significant person in my life. Cimmorro: my headpiece and holy symbol. other jewelry pieces i have i can replace easily, but not these…

Q - if you had a completely free day with no responsibilities or obligations, what would you do with your time?

Finn: Honestly? I'd like to sleep and dream about nice things. Rokka: I would love to go sight seeing at places i haven't been to! Han: oh me too Rokka!!!! maybe we can go together someday :) Cimmorro: mmm… quite rare the last few years but i did enjoy my day offs by fishing, spending time with the children and sleeping of course. i’ve no idea what else to do, otherwise...

Q - do you take long or short baths?

Finn: I liked to take long baths back then. Rokka: long! gotta make sure all this fur is fresh and clean! Han: i used to be in and out of the water real fast but i can enjoy a long bath now sometimes... Cimmorro: i like to take long ones whenever i can! but i often find myself having to take short baths or showers in a rush...

Q - favourite piece of literature?

Psalm: I haven't gotten much reading in recently, but I liked the stories my mum would read to me when I was younger. When I remember the names I'll get back to you. Rokka: the ones that has a picture of something and words that tells me what they are! I like those if that counts Keva: my what Finn: I love folklore and fairy tales... I hope this doesn't make me seem childish. Han: lich-reh.... is that one of those book names for a mushroom?? Cimmorro: does the white book count? feel like that’d be too obvious hehe… i like to read anything i find interesting at the time. arcane, scriptures of other churches, etc. not too big of a fan of fictions though.

Q - ur cute have a nice day ♡

Finn: Rokka someone said youre cute. Rokka: oh..! really? how do you know?!

Q - if you could get away with one crime what would it be

Rokka: the only crime I will commit is this current crime due to being framed!!! Cin: Arson. Psalm: Murder I guess, given our current situation. Cimmorro: ...if i knew i was guilty, i’d turn myself right in.

Q - We Got A Benefit Concert 4 These Male Lesbians In Da Planning Stages How U Gon Contribute

Keva: [geralt "hm"]

Q - where is this fuk house located. I need it for research purposes.

Han: there are several brothels in shorewater, if you want i can give recommendation...

Q - how do you feel about showing skin when it comes to what you wear? are you comfortable with it, or do you prefer not to?

Han: (slaps her bare thigh) you know it baaabyyyyyyy Rokka: i feel more comfortable and less restricted with no shirt.....pants r cool tho! Psalm: Like any average person. Cimmorro: unless it’s incredibly hot out, i 100% avoid exposing any of these scales to any dirts and stains

Q - maybe in a word or two, without giving a lot away, what are you in shorewater for?

Han: i was told to get a fresh start here? whatever that means LOL Keva: repay a debt Rokka: im just s---im just sitting here Psalm: No particular reason. Just ended up here really.

Q - do you ever feel lonely

Finn: ^___^ Rokka: hard to when I'm around these fellas *gestures to everyone* Psalm: No, I don't mind being by myself. Keva: (long silence with no eye contact before answering) sometimes, lately, whatever Cimmorro: fucking homesick is more like it

Q - what's something that makes you feel nostalgic

Han: ... some of my weapons and tools. Keva: i guess, elfonsent or whatever it's called here....big festivals for public holidays Cimmorro: Jasper.

Q - do you like to cook? what would you say is your specialty?

Rokka: does roasting something on a stick count??? Han: same as rokka... i think i always did more of preparation of ingredients than actual cooking. Keva: i don't cook Cimmorro: yeee people seem to enjoy my stuffed grilled fish the most

Q - do you like it here in shorewater, unfortunate events aside?

Han: yeah!!! its been fun! i was not here very long but i made a couple of friends!! Keva: eh, it's definitely true a lot of things happen here Cimmorro: i'm not particularly interested of this place

Q - how would you feel about getting involved in a train murder mystery that may or may not involve werewolves?

Han: WEREWOLVES???????????? HOW DO I INVOLVE MYSELF Keva: hard pass Cimmorro: [grimacing] i’d rather avoid doing anything that doesn’t involve my duties to my faith, if i had the choice.

Q - what incredibly common thing have you never done?

Finn: So, I hear that commoners are very skilled in all sorts of handiwork? How exhilarating. One day, I'd like to fix my chair myself when it breaks down. Or shop for ingredients on a market street myself, imagine the wonders! Keva: read Cimmorro: ...a vacation?

Q - Welcome to Good Burger home of the Good Burger! Can I take your order?

Finn: May I order some Nuggets

Q - do you prefer to be the big spoon or the little spoon?

Psalm: Neither. I don't sleep on my side. Keva: if i had to pick, big Rokka: either one...I'm not picky Finn: I have never been either. Well, perhaps the little spoon after sharing a bed with Rokka? Han: big spoon!!!!! Cimmorro: big

Q - do you like to dance?

Keva: (shrugs) it can be fun with friends Psalm: Yes. Rokka: yeah!! boogie woogie oogie Finn: Very much so! Cimmorro: yeap!!

Q - if you could have any animal or beast as a pet without any harm to you or those around you, what would you have?

Rokka: bunnies are cute hehe Han: i would have a giant dragon or chimera or some thing badass like that Finn: A dragon indeed sounds "badass". But isn't it too big?... Cimmorro: both are huge and sound tedious to upkeep nonetheless. i’m perfectly happy with Jasper.

Q - if you were to change your hairstyle, what would you do?

Han: i wonder what it would be like if i cut all off, but... Keva: cut it short again i guess Psalm: I'd grow it out. Rokka: *looks at his whole body* much to think about Finn: I'd want to cut it short again. But at the moment I'm trying to grow it out. Cimmorro: i once considered growing mine out a bit just to try, but i usually trim my hair during the summer so it never came to be. i feel like it’d be a hassle to do it now and i’ve lost interest.

Q - Hey! What do you guys think of the death penalty?

Keva: i don't Want to think abt the death penalty Rokka: same here Finn: Sir this is a fuckhouse.

Q - have you all ever heard a voice in your head?

Rokka: the one that sounds like me? yeah Psalm: No. Finn: *blinks Yes in morse code*

Q - boobs or butts?

Psalm: Who would ask this...? *He chuckles and doesn't answer.* Rokka: Do.....Do we really have to answer this? *sweating* Finn: There's only one correct choice. Han: this question is foolish. both are great.

Q - if you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

Plum: ..................................... Psalm: The ability to go back in time would be useful. Plum: the ability to go back in time would be useful Rokka: stop making me choose one thing i can't choose. Finn: I want to dual wield blades. Cimmorro: teleportation powers perhaps...

Q - if you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30 year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

Psalm: What an odd question... I'd rather keep my mind. I'm curious how a 90-year old me would look. Rokka: This is hard Finn: *laughs in vampire* Han: body Cimmorro: body

Q - tell me about the first crush you remember having

Psalm: No. (offscreen there is a screech of a chair. keva is leaving) Rokka: Ummm...... Finn: (Finn "Hm"s) Did anyone else crush on characters from the books they've read? For me it was a swordsman, in any case. Han: (whispers to the asker) whats a crush?? Cimmorro: [tilting head at han and shaking his head] ...yeah, finn. wee jas.

Q - what’s your favourite thing about someone you admire?

Rokka: she's really tall! and strong! I admire her strengths! she's really nice!!! She's the best. Keva: that everything would be okay if they were around. or it felt like that at least Psalm: He was more friendly than me, and I envied how easily he could make friends when we were younger. Finn: He stands his ground against anyone. Han: they are so easy going and kind hearted, even when i am not to them. Cimmorro: just about everything? especially that they seem to never break under pressure and are completely capable of making decisions with swiftness and grace...

Q - would you like to be famous? in what way?

Psalm: Absolutely not. Keva: no Rokka: I don't think I have the skills to go that far. Finn: I don't aspire much fame but some renown as a swordsman seems worthwhile. Cimmorro: gaining a good enough reputation to be an influencer… i believe it would be important for the church, so i wouldn’t refuse it.

Q - rokka how does it feel to be the funniest person in existence

Rokka: I don't know how it feels because I just found out I am funny...? How?

Q - rokka i have on good authority that cole wants to play rugby with you what’s your response

Rokka: YEAHHHH LETS GOOOOOO maybe then we can become true friends through the bonds of rugby!!!!!

Q - rokka what do you think about shirts

Rokka: They're alright I guess? Don't really see the point of it though

Q - Plum, would you like to shop with me one day? I love your fashion sense. -Finn

Plum: I WOULD LOVE TO. WHEN THIS SHIT IS OVER THEN ALSO THANK YOU

Q - plum are your teeth crooked or did you lose a tooth

Plum: they're crooked

Q - cole what do you think about vinny as a boss

Cole: ooooh incredible ! The fact that i get to work under a wizard of his skills as an apprentice still bowls me over, I've learned so much and i haven't even been here all that long. I know he doesn't seem to like the Accord much but being part of their group is no joke, he musta' had some cool projects back in the day. He doesn't seem to mind when i break things either, he's a real swell guy like that, nothing like my last boss [nervous laughter]

Q - when is the last time you got a manipedi

Rokka: got a what? Cimmorro: i do my own! as often as needed!

Q - what is it like having a tail

Rokka: Idk? ok? but what's it like NOT having a tail though? :thonk: Psalm: ...Normal. This is the norm for me, so I have no clue how to answer this in a way that would be satisfactory to someone that doesn't have one. Like with any part of the body, I don't really think about it unless I remember it's there. I guess the one thing is that I don't like having holes in my clothes, so everything I wear is low waisted. Finn: I wasn't aware everything you wear is low waisted, much less why. Psalm: I always wear a waist sash, but next time I can go without if you're curious. Cimmorro: i used to trip over my own tail a lot when i was a kid. it was rather long for my size at the time hehe

Q - you’re right rokka what is it like Not having a tail

Rokka: You Tell Me Keva: they weren't asking you

Q - rokka how do you maintain your fur

Rokka: Check out my youtube channel please like and subscribe! -> [link to fur answer above]

Q - Keva what is the way to your heart? I'm asking for a friend...

Keva: tell your friend to find smth better to do

Q - finn your hair is so shiny what’s your secret

Finn, visibly confused: There is no secret to my haircare. I simply do what everyone else does, no? Personally I use lye soap and rosewater. Perhaps you ought to try a different oil or mixture from your usual.

Q - finn what do you think about your uncle’s growing fanclub? what does he think abt it?

Finn: His "fanclub"? Well, it is true people take a liking to my uncle rather quickly, but I've yet to see him reciprocate any such affections. If this "club" is anything official I would like to be its president though, to guide others of course. I may find someone who could get along with him, he really ought to settle down one of these days!

Q - finn can you tell us a little bit about your cousins?

Finn: Hmm... from the beginning they have been more outgoing than me, I must admit I am a bit envious of that. But the Vengaboys have brought out a lot in me already, I think.

Q - hey finn how tall are your heels

Finn: 3 inches. But I have taller ones for balls and the like.

Q - orin what would it take for you to share an embarrassing story about keva

Orin: hmmmm id probably wait until she left the room first....

Q - vinny how bad is your eyesight without glasses

Vinny: bad enough that id fall down the stairs in my own store if i lost em’ [anime sweatdrop] its why they have that handy string attached to them now, and well also because the cats like to bat at my face sometimes...

Q - ezra and cole have you ever had to help vinny find his glasses. let me clarify i know he has that thing where his glasses can hang from his neck but have you ever had to help vinny find his glasses bc he lost them anyways

Ezra: never, but he didn't always have the string, he told me he slapped it on because he had that exact problem. Cole: I've only ever seen em' with that string so he’s never really lost em'... though one time he broke them and i had to help him around the store for a week until a friend of his could fix them, its the grumpiest ive ever seen him [ she makes a face like this :y and laughs ]

Q - ezra i'm serious will you please let me buy you a new coat

Ezra: [he looks down confused at his clothes] ....

Q - ezra why won’t you get a new coat

Ezra: ...... do i need a new coat...? *Psalm laughs a little in the bg.*

Q - can you tell us more about your family han?

Han: ha ha hA HA HA HA HA HA HA. no. i want avoid all thought about them.

Q - han which muscle group is your favourite to flex

Han: (sits like the thinker for a long time in contemplative silence) for me, legs and thighs feel most strong. but others like when i flex arms 💪

Q - han you are very cool don’t let anyone tell you otherwise also i love you

Han: i am cool, thank you mystery stranger, also wH--

Q - han do you want to build a snowman

Han: you know, we used to play game where we would roll each other in wheel, down mountain, into snowmen, and who hits most win... fun times. i do want to build snowman again, yes :)

Q - which of you know how to tell direction from the stars

Han: i know ! 😊 (quieter) but only little bit... Cimmorro: ...y’know, someone once tried to teach me how to do this but i’ve fallen asleep while we were talking. [has guilt written all over his face]

Q - han what is your favourite way to wear your hair

Han: ah...my sibling did this complicated braid on me, before... it look very thin, like basket weaving...sad, never learned how they do it (han looks a bit melancholic)

Q - what do you value most in friendship?

Psalm: I should buy a full pitcher of beer at the next tavern, and for every question about friendship we receive just take a long sip from it. Rokka: the bond! loyalty! respect! this is more than one! oh well! Finn: The ability to confide without fearing loss or judgement. Keva: trust Han: oh, i agree with answer from finn.

Q - han, cole, and rokka how did you get so swole

Cole: [she taps her forehead] step one...mental fortitude.... Han: (scoffs) have someone on your ass since you have memory Rokka: (taps his biceps) determination!

Q - May I inquire where you've picked up that rodent from Keva? -Finn

Keva: while traveling

Q - psalm how long have you kept a journal

Psalm: Not very. I just started it. Helps to keep my thoughts organised, and having just reached Shorewater I figured it would be worth chronicling what I got up to.

Q - psalm you wear a lot of black nail polish but do you have any other colors? what are your favourites?

Psalm: I'm not fond of bright colours (for my nails at least), so black is my favourite. I've never really tried out anything else, but maybe I should, just for a change of pace.

Q - do you guys like piercings ?

Keva: do i like having them or do i like when other people have them what are you asking Rokka: (points at keva) what she said Psalm: Yes, I do have them after all.

Q - aaaaalright heres a better question then. would you prefer for your partner to have piercings or not? do you find it attractive?

Psalm: Oh I see. I guess they are attractive aren't they? (lol) Rokka: if they like them then I like them! They can wear whatever they want! I don't really have a preference for it. Finn: As long as it is nothing obscene, I will accept it. It can have its charm, I admit. Keva: i don't really care. i guess? Han: its so cool!! i wanted some myself but aah.. my tribe was very against that thing Cimmorro: yeah and yup.

Q - hey tieflings what’s horn maintenance like for you

Psalm: Not unlike er-, "body maintenance". At least in my case I don't do anything particularly special. Cimmorro: mine are too small to have any need for maintenance. i consider it a lucky thing since it’s less things to worry about.

Q - Psalm, who is your favourite character in GBF? -Finn

Psalm: I like Vania. I have to start playing water now because of her new alt unfortunately but... can't be helped. Finn: Haha, I like that answer. Good luck with your water! Psalm: Oh? I'm glad I passed. And thank you.

Q - would you ever wear matching couple things with your significant other

Finn: As long as it is fashionably, gladly.... That sounds like a very sweet idea, dear reader. Rokka: yeah!! I think it's cute hehe Psalm: That depends on the thing. Keva: ^ Cimmorro: absolutely

Q - hi um this question is for psalm how do you keep your hooves warm in the winter? do you have socks? leg warmers?

Psalm: That's an interesting question. While I'm not that well versed in the specifics of tiefling anatomy, I do know that keeping warm isn't really an issue for me whenever it gets cold, so I don't typically wear anything like socks.

Q - rokka do you have a favourite meat dish?

Rokka: hmm...anything roasted on a stick? But that's a stick not dish...meat buns!

Q - hey psalm han and plum your brows are amazing what salon do you go to

Han: sah lon? i dont know what that but these run in family Psalm: These are how they are naturally. I have better things to do with my own time than fuss about my appearance too much.

Q - what are your thoughts on the institution of marriage

Psalm: My parents are married and seem to like each other enough, so I suppose it's not so bad. Finn: I think it is merely a matter of who you choose to spend your life with, not marriage itself. So, I would like to be wed happily. Han: (whispers to the asker) whats marriage???? Cimmorro: [tilts head and squints a bit at han again rn]

Q - keva, do you think youll ever learn how to read? if yes, what kind of books would you want to read ?

Keva: (gaze falls to the table at the first question but at the second question she looks up and her eyes slightly squint questioningly at you) idk what kinda books there are bc i can’t read Psalm: Would you like some recommendations? I can read them to you if you want. Keva: (is getting visibly pink) Psalm: ....Is that a no?

Q - for every one, what's the way to your heart??

Finn: Hmm... you must be worthy as my rival! (he gives his rapier a test swing) That is for sure. But should you lack a passion for swordsmanship, please do your best to entertain me at a ball, at the very least. Rokka: um...? (Scratches his head nervously) I'm not sure how to answer this haha....just....please love me??? *shy* Psalm: I've never thought about it. I just like who I like. Cimmorro: fuck around and find out!

Q - do you own any porn? what kind

Han: asker, are you sure you dont just want directions to brothel? Rokka: what's a porn and how do you own one? What kinds are there? Psalm: "What's a porn" he says... Don't worry too much about it Rokka. Cimmorro: the only porn you all should be reading is the white book

Q - would you or would you not try roller skates (shoes with wheels on them)?

Finn: Shoes with wheels on them? That sounds most absurd... and yet... I must inform my uncle of this. Where does one acquire such shoes... ? Rokka: (tries to picture this in his head for too long the interviewer moves on) 🤔 Psalm: This sounds like a prime setup for falling on my ass, so no.

Q - hi vengaboys. i’ve been following your adventures since predebut. i’ve been stuck at home bc of a global pandemic and i gotta say it’s really bumming me out. what should i do

Finn: I have plenty experience with staying at home. A lot of people might tell you to hone a skill or indulge in hobbies you have been neglecting and while that can be a productive use of your time, it is easier spoken than done, no? I recommend, if you are allowed, to seek out quiet places without many people around. That way you do not endanger yourself or anyone else in these trying times. Spending time in nature is quite refreshing. Please look forward to our continued performance, dear reader. Psalm: *Is somewhat amazed.* I don't think I can give a better answer than that one. Rokka: wow finn you're so smart

Q - would you ever become a vegetarian if you aren’t already one

Keva: no Rokka: I don't like salad Psalm: Sure. Finn: I would literally die. I know I like to not die, so no.

Q - To psalm and finn, what’s your thoughts on that belial guy?

Psalm: *coughs into his sleeve* Finn: *does the same*

Q - how do you like to celebrate birthdays

Finn: I think throwing a ball can be quite fun, but I think spending it intimately is far more pleasurable. I am not so vain as to demand a ball each time.

Q - do you have people waiting for you wherever you call home? if you can share, who?

Finn: My family. I can't wait to speak to my cousins again and tell them about this job, shall it go well. Psalm: I'm not sure if "waiting" is the word I'd use, but yes. Cimmorro: i can’t imagine any of those people not wanting my presence again

Q - do you like hugs

Finn: ... If they come from the right people, then yes, certainly. Rokka: oh! yes, I like hugging Psalm: What Finn said. I like them about as much as the average person, although I have a friend that mocks me for not being particularly good at giving them, whatever that means. (How can you be bad at hugging...?) Finn: Perhaps your posture is stiff, Psalm? It can make the hug feel rather "cold", so to speak. Psalm: That's what he said... (He looks lost in thought.) Rokka: psalm if you need practice hugging I am here (stands there with open arms) Finn: Consciously think about your movement. Are you actually bending your torso, properly using your arms? Try with Rokka. Keva: (was about to answer but is now biting her lip to keep from laughing at rokka and finn coaching psalm on hugging) Han: (faces away from this spectacle and slaps a hand over her mouth to not break out laughing too) Psalm: There's a lot more that goes into hugging than I initially thought.

Q - do you prefer hot weather or cold?

Keva: hot Han: cold!! honestly its too hot in shorewater... i never thought i would miss snow Rokka: more warm than hot......but if i had to choose between the two then it would be cold Finn: I've been preferring cold weather as of late. Psalm: Hot. Cimmorro: personally i’m more of an in between guy but if i’ve no choice then i’d say cold.

Q - when was the last time you went on a date

Finn: I'd like to go on one in the first place :cryingcat: Rokka: I wanna go on one too!! Finn: ... Looks like we both have something to gain here. I jest of course. Psalm: *racking his brain* Can't remember. Cimmorro: a couple or so years ago.

Q - Hello Vengaboys! We have not had the pleasure of meeting but I am an old friend of Finnian's. He tells me about your travels in his letters and I quite look forward to reading them. Your time in Shorewater sounds like it has been quite the whirlwind! I am writing because I have always known Finnian to be a kind and gentle boy who worries about others often, and I want to be sure he is as okay as he says he is. How is he really? Please treat him well, and please do not tell him I wrote! I imagine he would be quite beside himself with embarrassment if he found out. Sincerely yours, Sagessa P.S. I do hope we get to meet one day! May Pelor protect you until and long after then.

Rokka: Hello sagessa!! Nice to, uh, read you! I didn't know he had a friend! Yes...shorewater has been super crazzzzy. Kind of scary actually...don't come here. (Lol) you're right he is kind and well so far! He's nice to me and I like him! We shared a bed and it was nice. Also, don't worry my lips are sealed! Promise! Sincerely, Rokka. P.s. I hope to meet you soon! (saying this all outloud)

Q - Who taught you all how to fight? Or to hone in on a specific skill?

Psalm: I've been trying to figure that out myself. Rokka: my father Finn: *side eyes psalm* I took an interest in swordsmanship early. I've had an instructor and participated in many tournaments. Your opponents are your most valuable teachers. Han: ...the whole tribe, really. Keva: i learned on my own at first. Cimmorro: good ol’ parents gyahaha

Q - do any of you know how to give good massages

Psalm: I know, but whether or not they're "good" remains to be seen. Cimmorro: we were certainly taught basic massage techniques but i don’t really have the strength for it [laughs wryly]

Q - what are your thoughts and feelings about your country or hometown?

Psalm: I'll save time and just say that they're mostly positive. Finn: My hometown is okay. Could be better. :/ Cimmorro: i like my hometown. i can’t imagine settling down anywhere else at the moment.

Q - do you like bugs

Rokka: yeah, they're neat! Lady bugs were my favourite when I was young. Keva: as long as they're not biting me or trying to get at my food, they're fine Psalm: No, but I'm not scared of them either or anything silly like that. Finn: As a child I was less aversive to them but I must admit I find them most unpleasant and avoid all contact. Cimmorro: yeah!

Q - would you confess to your love interest first

Rokka: idk maybe? I've never been in this situation before do I'm not sure...👉👈 Psalm: It depends. No sense in keeping some things hidden though. Finn: If there is no other way, yes. Cimmorro: sure. beating around the bush feels like a waste of time really.

Q - Do any of you have any second given names?

Finn: Yes, actually. My second name is Oswald. Han: (scoffs) no. threw it out.

Q - does your chain hang low does it bobble to the floor can you tie it in a knot can you tie in a bow can you throw it o’er your shoulder like a smth smth smth does your chain hang low

Finn: Psalm, do you recognize this writing ? Psalm: It...sounds vaguely familiar, but as I'm not from around here I'm not too sure.

Q - have you ever been to or in a wedding party? do you like going to weddings?

Psalm: I've been to my parents' wedding, but aside from that not really. I do like parties. Wedding parties seem like fun. Cimmorro: i ordain weddings... or, well, i used to. the parties are fun, but overseeing the ceremony itself is something i’d rather avoid.

Q - have you ever been somewhere haunted?

Psalm: I would hope not. Cimmorro: once or twice? strangely fun? i’d recommend it :)

Q - have you ever held a baby

Psalm: Probably? What kind of question is this? Han: ..yeah. Cimmorro: yeah! it was practically my job back then haha

Q - what would be an invention you’d really like to see to make life easier

Psalm: Airships were already invented, so I'm out of ideas. Cimmorro: a portable communication device more efficient than a sending stone sounds nice

Q - plum do you miss your sister?

Plum: yeah. who the hell are you

Q - keva what's your favourite hairstyle?

Keva: there’s up and there’s down idk how to do anything else Finn: You don't know how to do anything else? If you are ever interested I'd be happy to assist you in finding something to your liking. And to teach, shall you wish it. Keva: first psalm now you what is going on Psalm: It's an admirable trait for sure :-). Finn: You could simply stand to make more of yourself, Keva. Keva: you're just making fun of me now Finn: Absolutely not. But let's just say you're not going to impress anyone like this. Keva: who is there to-- i'm not Trying to impr-- okay (she is leaving) Finn laughs quietly to himself as she leaves Psalm: Hmm.. if I ever grow my hair out I'll be sure to come to you Finn. Finn: Gladly.

Q - i heard thru the town crier that you all were not in fact the ones who ruined elfonsent spell but how do i know i can trust you

Psalm: We didn't ruin the ball. Just take the kings' word for it I guess

Q - do you like to draw

Finn: I do not recall ever trying my hand at it. I've no time for such things. Plum: sometimes Cimmorro: sure.

Q - would you get a tattoo? what and where would it be?

Rokka: What if 😳 I already 😳 have a tattoo😳 ? 😳 On my back 😳 Plum: *confused thinking about all the fur... did they shave him first and then tattoo him? the fuck would be the point if the fur just grows back??* Han: i only have all this birthmark... and if anything, i would like to get rid of them. Cimmorro: i already have one but maybe i’d get a few more 🤔

Q - when you’re not feelin so hot what do you do to cheer yourself up?

Rokka: roaming or good company is always nice...but it hasn't been that easy to have these days. Keva: find somewhere up high Psalm: Not sure. I have the tendency to avoid problems. Plum: drink, i think? pretty sure i drink Han: go as far into a forest as i can Cimmorro: drink

Q - have any of you had a job before this? i know han worked at the swallow’s perch but what about the rest of you? what was the job if you can share?

Psalm: I'm in my early twenties. I think there'd be something wrong if I didn't have some line of work before this. (He ignores the rest of the question.) Plum: i work for an alchemist over in talornia Rokka: check it (starts juggling) Han: hey im still working there ;-; Cimmorro: temple work. i help oversee almost everything.

Q - do any of you know how to play instruments?

Psalm: I definitely can't. Keva: sort of, not really Cimmorro: nah... though i was interested in learning one

Q - any favourite scary stories?

Psalm: I'm pretty ambivalent about the horror genre. Not my thing. Finn: That's a shame. I would've asked you for a recommendation Psalm.

#QA #QARokka #QAKeva #QAHan #QAFinn #QAPlum #QAPsalm #QAVinny #QAEzra #QACole #QACimmorro #chip creates a whole new series of tags

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