#my dad’s birthday was this past Sunday and while it wasn’t a bad one at all | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

something-tofightfor · 4 years

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Seasons to Cycles / 3

Pairing: Logan Delos x Reader

Word Count: 13,467

Rating: M (Mentions of drug use, sex with multiple partners, language, what happened to Logan in the park)

Summary: After spending time at Juliet’s, is there any reason for you and Logan to see each other again - especially with Ariella coming in for a few days? The answer is yes... and the situation is a lot more interesting than it may seem.

Another invitation to Juliet’s reveals a lot more truth about Logan, about his past ... and about his future.

Author’s Note: Nothing really to say here, except that writing Ariella makes me feel physically ill. I probably made her a lot more terrible than I needed to ... but oh well. The next one is where things really pick up. Thank you all for your feedback so far!

When Logan called the following Thursday, it surprised you, though not as much as it should have. You’d texted back and forth throughout the week; nothing serious, just saying hello and catching up, but like with other aspects of your friendship with Logan, the replies were coming much easier than they had been.

You’d looked the two of them up after spending the day with him at Juliet’s - finding out more about his relationship with Ariella, as well as more about the woman herself, and while she’d had a few high profile relationships before Logan, it seemed that their engagement had come out of nowhere. In between the text messages about your jobs, Juliet, and a TV show that you discovered both of you watched, you wanted to ask him about the woman, but at the same time, you didn’t. Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to, you reminded yourself as you gathered your laundry from the dryer, phone pressed to your ear. Because I think he’ll tell you. “This might sound strange,” Logan said, without much of a greeting. “But I was wonderin’ if you wanted to come over on Sunday and watch the season finale of -”

He continued, but you could barely hear him over the sound of the alarm bells going off in your head. This is bad. But when you realized he’d finished speaking, you hummed, closing your eyes. “Is that a… Logan, is that a good idea?” You didn’t want to assume anything about his intention behind the invitation, but it still made you feel uncomfortable. “We’d know why I was there, but if anyone …”

“Who’s gonna find out? There are hundreds of people that live in this building, you could be visiting any of them.” He paused. “I’m not trying to make you … I just thought …”

“This would be three weekends in a row, Logan. I don’t know how I feel about the fact that I’ve already seen you more than your fiancée has in the last …” But you trailed off, putting down your laundry basket and grabbing for your phone. “Isn’t she supposed to be here this weekend? Why -”

“She is. She’ll be in tomorrow and then fly out on Saturday night to go to her meeting. I’m leaving Monday for the Mesa, and I just thought …” What did you think, Logan? “You can invite Jess if you want, I …” I could.

“She doesn’t watch. Can’t get into it, so that won’t…” You began folding towels, holding the phone between your cheek and shoulder. “Logan, why are you … I’m sure you have a ton of friends, so why …” Why are you questioning this?

“You get along with my sister.” He said it simply, but you understood the weight of the words. “And like I said, I lost a lot of my friends when I changed my lifestyle, so it’s nice to …”

“Do you consider us friends, then?” It was blunt, but you needed to ask. “I mean we haven’t really known each other for long, so it might be too soon to …”

“I do.” There was no hesitation. “And I know that it’s probably hard for you to believe, especially since we just met, but I like you, and I like that you aren’t intimidated by my history.” I don’t know a lot of it, Logan, but I … “So I’m inviting you over, and you can say no if you want, but I just thought I’d ask.” Pulling your phone away from your ear, you pressed the button for speakerphone, setting it onto the table. “I’m gonna take your silence as -”

“I’ll come over, Logan. Just give me your address, and I’ll be there.” He let out a breath, asking if you were sure. “Yep.” Stacking the towels together, you smiled, even though you were angry at yourself. You’re setting yourself up for disappointment. “Besides, I’m pretty sure the neighbors will appreciate the fact that I’m not yelling out loud in my apartment for an hour and a half.”

---

“So you’re going out to the Mesa Monday morning?” She was laying on his bed on her stomach, legs bent at the knee and joined at the ankle. “Clients?”

“Yeah.” I told you that three times. “Gonna be there about a week, give or take.” He looked over his shoulder, watching as Ariella propped her chin up on one hand, her eyes on him. “How long will you be in San Fran for?”

“Not even 24 hours, Logan. If I wasn’t seeing you, I would have just flown there, but instead …” She waved her free hand in the air. “Here I am.” You could act a little happier about it. “And then I’ll be back home. Nathan’s birthday is next week, so we’re going to Amsterdam for a few days, and than I’ll…” He tuned her out, eyes roving over her face and then moving back, taking in the sight of her against his sheets, stretched out on his bed. Another trip. Another … another story we’re going to have to buy to keep it quiet, another …

“Ari?” He shifted toward her, reaching out with one hand to touch her left, his thumb rubbing against the ring on her finger. “I can come see you in London on my way home from the Mesa, stop by for a couple days. Maybe we can meet with some of the -” She laughed, tossing her head to one side. “What’s so funny?”

“That’s why we have a wedding planner, Logan. So we don’t have to deal with it.” But I want to …

“Don’t you want to be part of the planning, Ari? Even a little? I know you picked out a dress, but -”

“Actually, about that.” She sat up, straightening her shirt., her hands smoothing it down her sides. “There are a couple of designers that are asking if they can make my dress, and I’m meeting with my publicist to figure out what the best option is, exposure-wise.” Is that all this … don’t you … “You could probably do the same with your suit … tux, whatever you choose. Maybe even the rings, too”

“Well, won’t we have to -” She rolled her eyes.

“You know as well as I do, Logan, that this wedding is going to be the only thing people talk about for months. It’s going to be good for us and for Delos, so we might as well get as much out of it as we can, don’t you think?” She was twisting a strand of hair around her finger, and Logan fought back a wince. “Call the planner again, figure out what they think will look best, and then have them give you options. It’s simple.” She was looking around, her lips pressed together. “And are you going to look for a house? I don’t want to live in an apartment in the middle of …” Logan gritted his teeth, reaching up to run his fingers through his hair.

“I thought that since we’d be living there together, a house would be something that we could …” She stared at him, deadpan, and Logan cut himself off. “... find together, but I guess I can find a realtor when it gets closer. Maybe I’ll use Juliet’s, she found her -”

“No suburbs, Logan. If I’m leaving London and coming here, I want to live by the beach. Or at least somewhere I can see it.” That’s the most reasonable thing you’ve said all day. She said his name again, and Logan’s attention went back to the woman, who was climbing out of the bed and walking toward the bathroom door. “I’m going to shower, since I have to be at the airport in just under two hours.” He nodded, and she gestured to the open door. “Are you gonna -”

He forced a smile. “Nah. Wouldn’t wanna make you late.” The woman actually laughed, her eyes lighting up. “Go. Your stuff’s still in there from last time, so you won’t have to get on the plane smelling like …”

“You always smell good, Logan.” She wrinkled her nose. “That wouldn’t be a bad thing.” As she disappeared into the room and closed the door behind her, Logan lowered himself onto the bed, rubbing his hands over his face. This just gets more and more exhausting. But maybe … He pushed himself to his feet, making his way out into the living room and sitting on the arm of his couch, eyes on the city stretched out in front of him. The sun was just beginning drop behind the buildings to the right of his balcony, and Logan chewed on his lip as he stared through the glass, thinking.

Ariella’s visit had been no different than the last time she’d been in LA, though much shorter. He’d picked her up from the airport in one of the Delos cars, waiting by the gate, and even though he thought that there had been a few paparazzi, there’d been no pictures of the two of them popping up. But they know she’s here, she posted a picture from the plane, and … He rubbed the back of his neck, thinking. And we went out for dinner last night, so…

Logan liked the press at times, understanding the need to bolster the Delos image with being seen publicly, giving the photographers what they wanted every now and then. Especially after what happened a couple years back, and with Juliet’s divorce. We both kinda fucked that up, didn’t we, Dad?

Between Juliet’s public divorce, and Logan’s very public downward spiral, there’d been a fair amount of rebuilding for the Delos brand, starting with Logan’s trips to rehab and continuing with the introduction of the everyday tech line and his engagement. Ask which of the latter two I’m prouder of. Looking down and then back up and out the window, Logan sighed. It’s not that I don’t care about her, because I do, but … “Logan?” He looked back over his shoulder, seeing his fiancée standing in the doorway wearing a simple blue dress, her wet hair braided and hanging over one shoulder. “I’m gonna keep this here, alright?” She was holding a small tin in one hand, a lopsided smile on her face. “Not trying to take it on a commercial flight, and since I don’t have access to the Delos jet yet…” She shrugged, moving the tin back and forth. “That would be a story.”

Warily, he stood and walked toward the woman, head tilted to the side. What is it this time? “Ari, what -” But when he put his hand against her shoulder, the other one curving around the back of her head to tilt it up and look into her eyes, disappointment hit him like a freight train. “You gotta slow down with that shit, you know that.” He leaned down, lips finding her forehead, the skin hot beneath them. “Why’d you -”

She leaned into his touch, sniffling twice before she answered. “The shit’s better here than at home, and I…” She sighed, her lips against his throat. “You know that, Logan, you used to bring it -” Her heart was racing beneath his palm, but Logan stiffened, pulling away.

“Used to. Not anymore.” The woman opened her eyes wide, straightening up and staring at him. “You know I -” She ran her tongue along her lower lip, pupils dilated, and though eighteen months prior, the action would have caused Logan to grip her by the arms, pushing her back into the bedroom and opening the small tin for himself before he took her to bed, he wanted to do none of those things. “I don’t do that shit anymore, don’t want it in my…” But the woman rose up on her toes, lips finding Logan’s and lingering.

“You know the deal, Logan. It stops when we get married. All of it. But until then?” She kissed his cheek, mouth moving slowly over his skin, and Logan closed his eyes, the hand at the base of her skull tightening, his fingers sliding down her bare arm toward her elbow. “Until then, I’m gonna keep doing what I’m doing. That’s what we agreed, right?” We did. It’s all there in the… He felt her teeth close around his earlobe, and Logan’s eyes closed, fingers of both hands flexing as his body reacted to the feeling. “Besides, you wouldn’t get in the shower with me, so I … improvised.”

“Ari.” He sighed her name out, pushing her away gently. “Look at me.” She did, head tilted up slightly, and Logan let go of her hand, reaching up to brush his thumb beneath her nose, removing a tiny spot of white from her pale skin. “Just because I know that doesn’t mean I wanna…” He drew his lower lip into his mouth, watching as the woman’s eyes followed the movement. “I don’t want to see you like this right before you go, especially since I don’t know when we’ll see each other again.” It’s the truth. “You never answered me, do you want me to stop in London when I -”

“Nah.” She gave him a lopsided smile and pulled out of his arms, shrugging her shoulders. “I’ll see you when I come back in for your dad’s party, that’ll… that’ll be good.” Will it? That’s another month. “I’m gonna put this in this drawer.” She stepped over to the kitchen, pulling one of the smaller drawers open and sliding the tin in. “I’ll get it when I come back, unless you …” She glanced up. “Unless you decide to use it before then.” No. I won’t. I’ll move that to the safe after she’s gone. She walked back toward him, her bare feet padding over the wooden floor and reached up, her hand cupping his cheek. “When I come back, Logan? We can meet with anyone you want. A caterer? Florist? Venues?” Really? “I know I should care more, but I’ve never really… thought about my wedding, Logan, and it’s just … overwhelming.” I didn’t either, I didn’t even have a steady relationship until…

Though he kept his expression impassive, Logan realized that he’d never been in a steady relationship. Yeah, we’re engaged, but … “I’ll look into it, Ari. I’ll let you know.” He reached up, covering her hand with his and squeezing. “Let me call you a car. You may not be usin’ the jet, but I can have one of the Delos drivers here in ten.” She agreed and he stepped away, pulling his phone out of his pocket and tilting it. As the screen lit, he was surprised to see a message from you, reminding him that you needed his address. Shit, I forgot to send it to her. I’ll do that… Swiping his finger in the same pattern as before, he opened the app to order the ride, typing in Ariella’s name as the passenger, which auto-selected her preferences. This shit is convenient, at least. “All done. It’ll be here in eight minutes.”

“Thanks.” The woman lifted both hands over her head, stretching as she walked back toward the bedroom. “I’ll get my bag, and then …” Her voice trailed off as Logan replaced his phone in his pocket, following her. Stepping back into the main room a few seconds later, a small suitcase trailing behind her, Ariella paused, one hand on the marble countertop. “Why haven’t you asked me about last weekend, Logan?” He heard a quiet clicking as she tapped her fingers against the surface. “I got the alert from my publicist that the story was axed, but…” Here we go. He was familiar with the mood swings, the changes in Ariella’s behavior, but what was new was the fact that she was trying to pick a fight with him immediately before leaving. It’s giving her ammunition. Giving her an excuse to…

“Because I don’t want to know.” His words honest, Logan looked straight into the woman’s eyes. “That’s three, Ari. Three times we’ve had to … catch things before they go too far. The deal was -”

“I know the deal, Logan.” She snapped at him, all traces of affection that had been present only minutes before gone. “Just like you do. It’s not my fault I get followed more than you do, that people want to -” He laughed, reaching up with one hand to scratch one side of his face, nodding. So we’re going to go there? Alright.

“No, but it is your fault that you’re getting sloppier, so that’s on you.” The anger he felt was real; bubbling over after months of reflection, and Logan reminded himself to take a deep breath, reining it in. “But that’s what the lawyers are for, right? Keeping shit like that away from the press?” She shook her head at him, and just as Logan was about to speak again, his phone pinged, letting him know that the car was only a few minutes away. “There’s your ride.” He gestured to the door. “Good luck with your meeting, Ariella.” The woman looked as if she wanted to speak but didn’t, instead walking past Logan and to the door. “And have fun with Nathan next week. Hopefully in Amsterdam, you won’t be followed as much as you are in London, so you -”

“Oh, fuck you, Logan. You act like you’re a goddamn saint.” She snarled the words, turning back to him and flexing her fingers around the suitcase’s handle, the diamond on her finger glinting in the overhead lighting. “Remember when we met? You were worse than me, and I didn’t judge you for it. Now you’re acting like… Jesus, live a little, Logan. Otherwise, the next thr-” She cut herself off, shaking her head back and forth. “We both knew what this was, Logan, so I don’t know why you’re giving me so much shit right now. Make the most of it - I sure am.”

“Yeah, I fucking know you are.” But he didn’t raise his voice, just watched the woman with a half smile on his face. “Have a safe flight, Ari. I’ll see you in a few weeks.” She didn’t say anything else, instead turning and pulling the door open after walking the final few feet toward it, Logan standing in the middle of his living room. It shut behind her, and though she didn’t slam it, Logan closed his eyes at the sound. This was so much easier when I was … His eyes opened and went to the kitchen, staring in the direction of the drawer she’d used. So much easier. So much less… But he looked away, taking a deep breath and stepping toward the balcony, sliding the door open and walking out onto it.

Logan’s fingers closed around the railing, gripping the metal as he leaned forward. He was only 17 stories up, but the view calmed him, his anger subsiding the longer he stood in place. She isn’t wrong. I did know. I do know. But as Logan dropped into one of the chairs, one hand covering his face, it didn’t make him feel any better. That could have gone much differently. He rubbed at the bridge of his nose, thinking. I wasn’t even going to mention Nathan or last weekend, or … she knew that we had to pay them off, knew what they got pictures of, knew what … and she still… “Fuck.” He swore again, slamming one hand on the table before he lifted his head, looking down Grand Avenue toward the Convention Center. He felt his phone vibrate, and for one long second, he thought that it might have been Ariella, calling to apologize, but when he pulled the device from his pocket, it was another message from you, complete with an apology for bothering him.

I know you’re busy, and I hate bothering you when Ariella’s there, but I thought I’d try again before it got too late. If you still want me to come tomorrow, I need your address. If not, I’m going to call my friend Kira and see if she wants to watch together. If you have to cancel, Logan, it’s no big deal, just let me know.

As he swiped up, he saw that your first message had been sent hours earlier, and Logan groaned. She was there when I ignored Ari’s call, so she probably thinks I’m… Logan scrubbed a hand over his face, swearing for a third time and then pushed the button to call you instead of just messaging back. She won’t answer. But you did, on the third ring, greeting him by name. “Sorry it took me so long, Ariella just left to get on her flight, and I just saw your first message.”

“Don’t apologize. I figured it was something like that, and I didn’t want … I shouldn’t have sent two messages, that looks …” No, it doesn’t.

“If you come over early tomorrow, we can get somethin’ to eat before.” He cut you off, resting his elbow on the table, fingers curled and tucked beneath his chin. “How’s that sound?” He heard you take a breath. Why does she second guess everything I say?

“I guess we’ve gotta eat, Logan.” He released the breath that he’d taken, smiling. “I’m not too picky, so whatever you want to order works for me.”

“We’ll just order when you get here, it’s fine.” Logan sat straight up, then leaned back in his chair. “That’s onea the nice things about living here - plenty of options.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “What time you wanna stop by? Show starts at 9.”

“I can get there at 8:30?” Logan laughed out loud, and you did too, but yours was nervous. “What’s so funny?”

“What’s the point, then? We won’t even have time to order or eat, and then…” He realized that he wanted to spend longer than that with you, and Logan stopped speaking, eyes going wide. Oh, that… “I mean, if you have something to do and can’t get here til then, that’s fine, but…” Your end of the line went quiet, and Logan was afraid that the connection had been broken when you finally spoke again.

“What time do you want me there, Logan? I have no plans, except going grocery shopping, and…” You sighed. “I have work Monday, and you have a flight, so…”

“Any time after 5 is fine.” That gave you a larger window, and Logan figured you wouldn’t get to his place until at least 6, but the earlier time appealed to him. Especially since after that I’ll be … gone for a week, at least. “Just let me know tomorrow, alright? I’ll let you go now, but I wanted to call you instead of texting, because I…” Why’d you call, Delos? “It was easier, and that way I didn’t have to wait for an answer.” And because I wanted to. The sound you made convinced Logan that you’d rolled your eyes, but when you spoke, you sounded happy.

“Why don’t… why don’t I shoot for 5:30? What’s the address? Where do I park? Is there a garage, or -” Shit, I didn’t even think of…

“I get two spaces in my name, plus a couple guest spots, so when you pull in, turn in off of Olympic, and give my name at the gate. I’ll let ‘em know you’re coming, so they’ll tell you where to go.” You repeated the information, and he was almost positive that you were writing it down. “I’m on the 17th floor, in 1703, so just take the elevator up, or I can come meet you in the lobby.”

“Elevator’s fine, Logan. I think I can manage.” He agreed, standing and walking back into his condo, eyes moving around the room. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then?” He agreed, saying your name and telling you to have a good night. “Oh, I’ll try. I’m about to run out and grab dinner, and then I’m going to watch a movie, so… thrilling Saturday over here.” It’s better than mine.

“What’s for dinner?” He couldn’t help asking, even as he stood in front of his own refrigerator, hand on the door. “That way I won’t pick the same thing for tomorrow.”

“There’s this place that’s right around the corner that’s a tiki bar. I can walk there, it’s so close, and it’s a hole in the wall, but they have like fifteen different types of tropical drinks.”

“That’s not food.” He grinned, imagining you with a frozen drink in your hand, twisting the tiny umbrella between your fingers. “And you’re drinkin’ alone in a bar?” You laughed again at that, and Logan was happy to hear that there was no hesitation or apprehension to the sound.

“No, I usually meet friends there. But tonight, I’m going by myself. And I know it’s not food, Logan, but they don’t have a kitchen, they just have different food trucks park on the side street.” You cleared your throat. “So, I’m going, and I’m gonna order a giant Mai-Tai to go, hope the taco truck is there tonight, and bring it all home to eat alone while I watch my movie.” That sounds great. He held back from saying it, though, just agreeing with you. “So I’ll see you tomorrow, Logan?”.

“Yeah. I’m gonna go pack, that way I don’t have to do before you get here, or after you leave.” Even though it won’t take me long, since I only need a few outfits. He said goodbye and then hung up, still standing in front of the refrigerator. Tacos actually sound really… “C’mon, Delos.” He rubbed at his beard, shaking his head. “You …” But the more Logan thought about it, the more he realized that after hearing you talk about tacos, nothing else would cut it.

---

When you parked in his garage the next night, you spent a few minutes looking around at the cars that were parked around you. Mine’s the least expensive one in here, by… You sighed. By far. Though Logan never made you feel as though you didn’t belong anywhere near him, the surroundings often did; the expensive hotel, Juliet’s multimillion-dollar home, Logan’s high rise, the talk of the parks and his traveling … it was all new to you, and much more extravagant than you were accustomed to. But there’s a first time for everything, right? Exiting the car, you saw Logan’s parked in the space next to yours, meaning that you weren’t in a guest spot - you were in one of his. I figured he’d have two cars parked here, but I guess…

You texted him as you locked your door, heading for the elevator, and even though he didn’t reply, you saw that he’d opened the message. Alright. It rose quickly, and when you stepped onto his floor, you took a deep breath, straightening your shoulders. It’s just a TV show. We’re just … But you knocked, taking a half step back, and waited for Logan to open the door. He did after only a few seconds, and you were happy to see that yet again, Logan was dressed casually, in a pair of black joggers and a white t-shirt, hair loose around his face. “Hey!” He grinned, gesturing for you to come in. “You’re early.”

“Not by much!” You walked into his apartment, glancing around. “It’s 5:30, Logan, I -” But he was laughing, following you down the short hallway and into the living room. “It’s so open. This place is…” Your hand trailed over the countertop, head turned toward the longer hallway. “Wow. That view.” He followed you silently, letting you look around, but when you turned back to face him, he had a smile on his face, eyes sparkling. “It’s gorgeous, Logan.”

“Is it?” He looked down and then back at you, tongue wetting his lips. “I guess I forget what it’s like to see this place for the first time, I’ve lived here for …” Furrowing his brow, he thought. “Four years?” His dark furniture was a stark contrast to the white walls and gleaming fixtures, large pieces of artwork adorning the walls, along with a massive TV mounted to the largest one, directly across from the oversized couch. It’s not stuffy. It looks … it looks comfortable, not just … formal. “Wanna see the rest of it?”

“Sure.” Without hesitation, you agreed, Logan motioning for you to follow him down the hallway where he pointed out the first bedroom, which was being used as an office, and the bathroom before leading you into the master bedroom, where he’d opened the drapes all the way. Without speaking, you walked past a large painting hanging on the wall and over to the glass, raising one hand to touch it with your fingertips. “Damn, this would … not be a good choice for someone that’s afraid of heights.” You looked over your shoulder, seeing that he was just a few feet behind you, watching you. “There’s so much glass, Logan, it’s…” You searched for the right word. “Stunning.”

“Yeah?” You nodded. You sound like an idiot. “Thank you.” Logan raised one eyebrow. “You should see my closet.” A few seconds later, you were standing inside of it with him, one hand covering your face as you laughed.

“When did we leave your condo and step into a…” You opened your eyes, using two fingers to flip through some of the hangers. “Tom Ford? Burberry? Givenchy?” This rack costs more than my… “Was there a portal or something I missed? Did we -”

“You think you’re so amusing, hmm?” He stepped closer, reaching past you to straighten one of the jackets. “I run a company, remember? I have to look professional.” As he drew his hand back, it glanced off of your arm, causing you to freeze in place. “If you turn around, you’ll see the…” You did as he spoke, and laughed again.

“And we’re back.” Even he laughed at that, watching as you shook your head while you looked at the opposite side of the closet, filled with less formal clothing - jeans and button downs, a few jackets and hoodies. “I really shouldn’t joke, though.” You looked over at Logan, who was leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest. “You wear the hell out of a suit, Logan.” He seemed surprised at your candor, but you were just being honest. “And having options is never a bad thing.” Whatever he’d planned on saying, he abandoned it, instead leaning forward and staring into your eyes.

“Yeah, but have you seen me in a tux?” Snorting, you ignored the question and walked past him and back into the room. I have. I’ve looked at too many pictures of you in all kinds of … “Bathroom’s just through there, I think you’ll like that, too.” He was right, and as you stepped through that doorway, you stopped in your tracks, eyes straight ahead. Oh, that shower, it’s… I bet the water pressure is… and it’s huge, two people could easily…

“Wow.” You knew that he could see your expression in the mirror’s reflection and so you turned toward it, frowning slightly. “I don’t mean to be so …” He stood next to you, hands on the counter’s edge, and waited. “I don’t know what I was expecting Logan, but this …”

“Why are you apologizing?” He was frowning too, and despite the fact that you wanted to continue staring into the glass, you turned your head, facing him head on.

“Because it’s just an apartment, Logan. It shouldn’t … I told myself I wasn’t going to …”

“Can I tell you something?” He reached out, laying his hand over yours for a second before pulling it back. Sure, I … “Seeing you react to this place? Your genuine reaction to it?” He laughed quietly. “It’s better than all the people that are used to it, and don’t even… don’t even bat an eye.” It’s not, stop. “And it’s much better than the people that used to come here and not even see it.” You watched as his eyes wandered back toward the bedroom before coming back to you. “So thank you, for bein’ honest about it.” You stared at him for a few seconds, and then decided to lighten the mood. We need it, this is too…

“You know what else I’m going to be honest about, Logan? You bit down on the corner of your lip. “I’m really hungry.” His lips parted and then he laughed again, straightening up and reaching out to you, tugging on your elbow. He didn’t even think about that, he just … But you didn’t think twice before you followed him, either. ---

After looking over the menu, you’d given him the go-ahead to surprise you, and when the delivery was made, the two of you took the food out onto his balcony, talking over your meal. Within an hour and a half, the two of you had eaten most of the food that had been delivered from Katsuya, and you were more than content. He ordered almost the whole damn menu, I think. But it was … “This the first time you’ve had -” You nodded, watching Logan’s surprise. “Damn, this is a whole night of firsts for you.”

“Actually.” You took a long drink out of your glass, the ice water deliciously cool in the slightly humid air. “Since I met you, Logan? It’s been a lot of firsts.” He leaned forward, elbows on the table and watched you.

“Like what?” I shouldn’t have said anything. “Oh, come on, you can’t just say that and then …”

“Well.” You reached forward, picking up one more piece of edamame and putting it into your mouth. “First time having to remind someone that ice cream is frozen and does actually melt if left out.” He wrinkled his nose, the lines deeper than usual. “First time embarrassing myself by trying to play the piano next to someone that -”

“Hey, you were really good for someone that hasn’t played in a while.” Ok, but still.

“Eh. Sure.” You eyed him, waiting a second. Do I keep this … “First time meeting someone’s sister based on the fact that I didn’t try to break up an engagement and sleep with you after knowing you for five minutes and having some drinks.” He actually laughed at that, mouthing the word ‘wow’. “What? It’s true.”

“It is.” It was his turn to take a drink, though he didn’t take his eyes off of you. “Keep goin’.”

“We’re already to tonight, Logan. This is only the third time we’ve actually… well, fourth if you count Whole Foods, but …” You shrugged, leaning back in your chair. “How many more firsts…” But you stopped, pressing your lips together as you realized what a dangerously loaded question that could be. Oh, no. He stayed quiet for a few seconds and then reached up, pulling his hair back from his face with one hand and using his tongue to lick at the corner of his mouth. I’ve never seen that look on his face before, he’s never done …

“Plentya firsts, actually.” Logan’s voice was low, but there was no hesitation. “But not ones … not ones that -”

“Stop, Logan.” Suddenly feeling panic, you shook your head back and forth, eyes widening. “Don’t.” You can’t, because I can’t, because if I think about any of that, I …

“There’s somethin’ you need to know about me.” He said your name, and though your heart was still beating rapidly, you managed to look back at him, hoping that your eyes weren’t wild. “The most important thing about me, actually.” What? “I never lie. Ever. I told you that when we got to Juliet’s, but … I can bend the truth, sure, and I do it, because I need to sometimes, for work. But outright lie? I refuse to.” He was still eyeing you, but you didn’t hear any indication that his words were forced. He said the same thing in the car. “And you can’t believe me, I know that, because anyone can say that they don’t…” He looked frustrated.

“Why are you telling me this, Logan?” You were still leaning back in your chair, arms protectively crossed over your chest. “What -” What does his honesty mean to me? It’s not …

“I don’t know. It’s not good business, I can say that for sure.” You had to chuckle at that, but cut it off quickly. “Call it a tell, call it a fault, call it whatever the fuck you want, but if we’re gonna keep seein’ each other like this, getting to know each other? You need to know that every single thing that I tell you is the truth, because…” His eyes clouded over for a few seconds, but then he blinked, refocusing on you. “Because it is.”

“Logan, what…” You took a deep breath. “I don’t understand where this is …”

“I like you.” He said it simply. “I like seeing you and talking to you.” You watched as his expression changed, the man sitting up straight. “You asked if I thought we were friends, and I said yes, and it was the truth.” Ok, but I already knew this, and I agree.

“And I like you, Logan, but that doesn’t …” Confused, you sat up too. “Why are you telling me this? What are you -”

“There’s so much you don’t… so much that …” He laughed quietly, looking down. “So much I wish I could tell you.” What the hell does that mean? “Forget it for now, alright? I shouldn’t have said anything, but you … you walked into it, with the whole “firsts” thing.” Though you wanted to know what he was talking about, you were content to let it go for the time being. He’s leaving for a week, and maybe he’ll have time to… and I don’t have to think about whatever this is, or what he… “I just want you to know that whatever happens, everything I say to you is the truth.” Logan stood, beginning to clear the table, throwing napkins and empty dishes into the delivery bag. “I know I gotta earn that trust from you, but maybe … maybe you hearin’ it will be …” This is strange, something …

You stood too, helping him, and within only a few minutes, you were both back in his kitchen, Logan sorting through the trash and you washing dishes. Say something. “So this truth thing.” You glanced over, watching as he stopped moving, meeting your eyes. “Has it been your whole life, or just since…” You made a face, realizing that you were walking into delicate territory. “Just since you got clean?”

“Both.” He answered immediately. “More now, because there’s nothin’ altering my thoughts, but … it’s been since I was a kid. Juliet used to know that she couldn’t get away with anything, because my mom would always …” His eyes filled with warmth. “I definitely didn’t get it from my dad, but honesty - and integrity - have always been really important, especially when it comes to Delos.” I get that. “And even with the people I’ve been with? Never lied to them, either. Never promised ‘em anything, or led ‘em on. When it was just sex, it was just sex. When it was just me not wantin’ to be alone? They knew it.”

As you stood in the middle of Logan’s brightly lit kitchen, listening to and watching him speak, you had to wonder if his truth with you was at the same level it was with everyone else. But this is so new, he has no reason to… “I appreciate that, Logan. It’s much easier when you know where you stand with someone. I’d rather have someone tell me in the beginning that they’re just trying to get laid instead of letting me get attached and then …” You lifted one shoulder, watching as his eyes moved with the action. “Leaving, or… letting me down.”

“Fuck ‘em.” He stepped closer, reaching behind you to turn off the water. “They do that shit, they don’t deserve you.” You don’t even know me. How can you … “D’you want a drink? We’ve got about twenty minutes, so we should…” He gestured to the living room. “Get comfortable.” That was an abrupt change. But it was … “Go ahead and get whatever out of the fridge, I’m gonna close the blinds and…” But you reached out, shaking your head as you touched his arm. “What?”

“No, don’t.” Looking past Logan, you stared out the window. “I live on the ground floor, Logan, the view is …” I could get used to it.

“Alright.” He cleared his throat. “But if there’s a glare on the TV?” He leaned closer, head angled. “I told you so.”

---

Even though the two of you were settled on the same couch, there was space between you. It’s better this way. He was trying to pay attention to the show - which truly was one of his favorites - but it was difficult. And this is a great episode, so… But Logan’s mind wandered, his eyes with it, and he found himself watching you more than he watched the TV. And that’s hard to do, it’s a goddamn 82 inch screen. You’d asked him for a blanket before the show started, explaining to him that you needed to have something to do with your hands when things got tense, and he’d obliged, pulling one of the extra ones off of the shelf of the front closet and passing it to you.

It hadn’t taken long for you to wrap it around your shoulders, covering up the exposed skin of your arms as you gathered it in front of your face, fingers gripping the material tightly. He found it incredibly endearing, the way you were engrossed in the show - commenting occasionally, turning your head to look at him when something shocked you, one hand shooting out from beneath the material to grip his arm at one particularly tense point. This is the most at ease I’ve seen her, and she’s more tense than … He grinned at the thought, eyes leaving you and going back to the TV. “Oh, shit!” He swore as one of the main characters began fighting another, Logan leaning forward, hands on his thighs. “Oh, that’s not…”

“I know!” You agreed with him, and he saw you moving out of the corner of his eye, shifting on the couch to lean forward too, shoulders hunched. “He shouldn’t -” But both of you groaned as the man tripped, flying forward and into the weapon the other was holding, a spray of blood erupting from the wound. “Fuck!” As the scene faded to black and then cut to a commercial, you yelped and looked at Logan, a pained smile on your face. “Sorry, I’m -”

“Don’t apologize!” He laughed, head moving back and forth. “If you could feel my heartbeat right now, it’s racing.” You moved before you thought it through, he could see it in your eyes after the fact, but only a second later, your palm was pressed against Logan’s chest, touch firm. “See?” He stared at you in the low light, watching as your eyes left his face and then focused on your hand before moving back up, slowly. Yeah, I know that look, I… Your name left his lips, but before you had a chance to reply, the show started again and you pulled your hand away, Logan feeling the tips of your fingers curl just slightly before they were gone.

Throughout the next twenty minutes of the show, Logan again tried to focus on the TV in front of him, and he found it easier. But why? The final commercial break began, and you spoke, voice quiet. “What do you think’s going to happen, Logan? I don’t think he’s dead, I think he comes back right before -”

“Oh, definitely.” He moved, realizing at the last second that he’d scooted closer to you instead of further away, his left knee nearly touching your bent right one. “There’s no way they let that be the last time we see him, he’s too important to kill off-screen, and we need to know what happens to that other asshole, so…” You laughed, giving him a smile. ‘

“Thank you for having me over, this was a lot of fun.” Yeah, it is. “Maybe next season we …” But you cut yourself off, lips pressed together. By the time the next season airs, I’ll be… married. “Well, we can text each other at least, right? Yeah. Yeah, we can.

Neither of you spoke for the entire last segment of the show, and by the time the credits started rolling, Logan saw that you’d pulled the blanket off of your shoulders, balling it up on your lap and leaning forward, eyes fixed on the screen. You’d been right - the character wasn’t dead, showing up at the last possible second to finish the fight, though bloodied and unsteady on his feet, collapsing at the last second before the screen faded to black. Figures. At least someone got to get even with … The image of William flashed in his mind, the man’s nose bloody after Logan’s punch, the single hit not even coming close to making up for everything that the man had done to him. But it’s what I could do. And he’s gone. He’s not in Juliet’s life anymore, or Em’s, or… “Should -”

“Shhh, Logan, there’s always an …” You stopped yourself as the after-credits scene began, the only thing visible on the screen the bare feet and lower legs of a woman, firmly planted on the floor next to a hospital bed. “Oh, my God.” You leaned further forward, mouth open. “Oh, my God.” The woman stood, one of her ankles wobbling, and then the camera began to pan upward. “Logan, it’s…” I know, it can only be… The music grew in intensity, and the final shot revealed that the woman in the hospital was the main character that had just been potentially killed off’s sister, who’d been missing for nearly the entire season. I wasn’t expecting… Before the screen faded to black again, the woman spoke only one word - her brother’s name. “Fuck!” You said it. You turned toward him, eyes still wide, and before Logan could react, you had both hands on his leg, squeezing. “Logan that was…” Both of you looked down at the same time, realizing what was happening, and as you swore under your breath and began pulling away, Logan moved, too. Don’t do it, Delos.

But he did, swiftly grabbing for your wrists before you could pull them away, his fingers circling them easily as he said your name. You froze, and Logan could feel your pulse racing beneath his fingertips. Is that from the show, or from… But he had an idea that it was from him, and the proximity that the two of you had. We’ve been walking this line all night. I shouldn’t have invited her over, this isn’t… “Tell me to let go.” He watched your lip quiver, eyes closing and your lashes brushing your cheeks. “I will, and we can -” Your grip on his leg tightened and for one brief moment, Logan thought that you weren’t going to speak.

“You should let go, Logan.” He heard the finality in your voice, though there was a slight waver to it. “You’re engaged, and I don’t … I can’t let …” When you met his eyes again, he saw that you were torn. Oh, if she knew, if she knew what … “Please, Logan.” He released you immediately, and you pulled your hands away, sitting straight up. “I need to go, I need to …” He waited until you’d stood to rise, once again reaching out, but this time, only touching you at the elbow briefly. “Logan, what -”

“I said I wasn’t a cheater, and I meant it.” You looked up at him, waiting. “This hasn’t ever been about me wanting to get you into bed, to have … this be some big secret.” He sniffled, glancing up at the ceiling. “I don’t even know if I’m just way fucking off base here, but I -”

“You’re not.” You swallowed hard. “Logan, this is … you’re …” I’m not? Despite outward appearances, Logan doubted a lot of things in his life, including the way people acted toward him - and their reasons for the behaviors. But then… “But it doesn’t matter, Logan. Because you’ve got a fiancée. You’re getting married, and I’m not going to be …” He watched you fighting to get the words out, your eyes slightly unfocused. “That isn’t what I want to be to you, Logan.”

“It’s not what I want for you, either.” But you don’t.. You don’t know, and I can’t… “I didn’t invite you here tonight because I wanted to fuck you.” He was blunt, but felt he needed to be. “There are parts of my life that aren’t … I told you, before, that you can’t believe everything you read, and I don’t know what you’ve …”

“Logan, I don’t care what the magazines or the websites say about the way you are with the other people in your life. I don’t give a shit if you slept with the entire population of California, but I would like to believe that what you - yourself - have told me is true. That you’re a good man, and that you’re honest and that you aren’t a cheater.” He heard your tone change as you spoke, each word coming out stronger than the last. She means it, she isn’t bluffing, and it’s not for show. “You’re a good looking guy, Logan. Really good looking. And you’re funny. You’re smart. You’re everything that people tick off on those little boxes in their heads when they think of someone that they’d want to be with - even just physically.”

“You -” But you cut him off, stepping closer to him and reaching up with one hand, letting yourself touch his shoulder. What is she doing?

“I’m guilty of flirting with you, Logan. And I won’t apologize for it, because you did the same thing back.” I did. “But now I think that I need to … not do that anymore, because I don’t want you to get the wrong impression of me.” He watched you frown, lips pressed together. “That’s not why I answered your calls, or why I text you back, or … the reason I came over here.” Goddamn this fucking NDA, I could just … “I’m going to go. I don’t want to keep digging myself deeper into this hole that I…” You closed your eyes, composing yourself. “Thank you for dinner. Thank you for having me over to use that giant TV. Thank you for -”

But it was Logan’s turn to cut you off, one finger pressed against your lips to silence you. Stop. “You’re welcome.” He pulled his hand away, focused on the sight of your surprise, eyes widening and your fingers flexing against his shoulder. “And for the record, I appreciate the fact that you think I check off those boxes, because a lotta people would be more than willing to tell you otherwise.” That got a small smile from you, but he also saw that you were still confused. Me too. “I was out of line. I shouldn’t have ...tonight? I shouldn’t have grabbed you, but it … happened.” And I’d do it again if you gave me the chance. “It won’t happen again.” Unless I find out a way to explain this to you. “So don’t apologize. And don’t worry - I’ll keep my hands to myself the next time I see you.”

He watched a look of disappointment fill your eyes - but then it was gone, replaced with one of relief. So her reactions depend on mine. Interesting. “Deal, Logan.” You pulled your hand away from his body and dropped it to your side. “But I really am going to go, it’s getting late, and I’ve got to work early. What time’s your flight?” Like nothin’...

“Ten. But I’m not flying commercial, so they can’t leave ‘til I get there.” Your lips twitched back into a smile, and Logan was happy to see the expression on your face again. “Private planes?” You raised one hand so that he could see it, using your pointer finger to draw a check mark in the air. Oh, you … But laughed before you did, nose wrinkling. “Ariella’s a lucky woman, no more TSA lines and all the snacks and drinks she wants?” She hasn’t been on one of the jets yet, actually… “Have a safe flight, Logan. And a good trip. I hope you can close the deal.”

“Already done, the trip’s a formality to show ‘em what they’re buying.” Your eyes lit up, and you congratulated him. “Nah, I had nothin’ to do with it, it was all Juliet. But still.” He grinned at you. “A week in the park? Always a good time.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” You turned away from him and started walking back toward the counter, where your bag was sitting. “Hey, do me a favor.” You turned toward him as you slung your purse over your shoulder, reaching up to push your hair away from your face. “I looked it up, and I know you can’t take pictures or anything of the park, and you can’t bring anything back with you, either.” He nodded. “So when you’re out there? If you have time? Focus on one thing that you’ve never really paid attention to. And when you get back, if … when we talk again?” You smiled at him, as if the previous 20 minutes hadn’t happened. “Tell me all about it, and make me think I’m right there with you.” You could be, maybe.

“I can do that.” He stayed where he was, watching as you stepped to the door. But before you pulled it open, Logan called your name, out, taking two steps toward you. What are you going to say? “Let me know you got home, alright?” You assured him you would and then you were gone, the door closing softly behind you. He groaned and dropped down onto the couch, covering his face with his hands. “What are you doing Delos? She isn’t … you’re not …” With difficulty, he pushed you from his mind, standing and walking down the hallway and into his room. You gotta get sleep, you’ve got meetings while you’re flying out.

But by the time Logan climbed into bed a few minutes later, his mind was racing with thoughts of the upcoming trip - and of the first Host he was going to take to bed. It’ll be about goddamn time, it’s been over a month since I’ve… Thoughts interrupted by the quiet chiming of his phone, Logan reached over to grab it, blinking at the bright screen in the darkness. She made it.

Home. Thanks again for tonight. Can’t believe she’s alive … next season’s going to be B A D for the people that killed her brother.

He laughed at your message, typing a quick reply out and then setting the phone back down on his nightstand. It is. He let out a deep breath, rolling onto his side and closing his eyes again. Maybe Clementine? Or Angela … if she’s still at the Mesa intake hub.

---

By Wednesday, you were no longer mortified by what had happened on the couch at Logan’s, and as you thought more about it, you realized that it had been for the best. He knows I won’t act on anything, and I know he’s… not a cheater. You hadn’t meant for the flirting to get to the point it had, nor had you meant to actually overstep and touch him the way you had, but you’d gotten caught up in the moment. Who wouldn’t… especially with someone like him?

It could have been the show, the beer you’d had, or maybe simply the closeness you felt to the man you were barely getting to know, but you’d put your hand over his heart - and then against his leg - without thinking… and then when you had, it had been too late.

You were attracted to Logan - physically, emotionally, irrationally, because you knew it wouldn’t go anywhere, but for a few moments, you’d felt the same coming from him, too. It isn’t possible. It can’t be possible. Not from him, not with … not with me.

There had been a few stories about Logan and Ariella online; pictures of them in the airport and then out at dinner, comments about their upcoming wedding, a closeup of her ring, glinting on her finger as they sat together at a table. He’s got her, so why would he… But Logan’s past wasn’t a secret either, the numerous times he’d been spotted out with different men and women, the stories that they told about him - sex in hotels and clubs, hooking up in private cars and rooms, drug use, Logan blowing exhausting amounts of money on meaningless bullshit - and a small part of you thought that maybe old habits didn’t die completely, and part of him was still looking for some sort of thrill before he settled down for good. But he said he wasn’t…

You sighed, spinning in your desk chair, eyes on the clock. I wonder what he’s doing right now. You didn’t know the exact location of the Mesa or the parks, but you knew that it was somewhere near the Philippines, meaning that for Logan, it was already the following morning. Bet he’s sleeping. Or… You’d also read - and seen - Logan do interviews about the Hosts and his interactions with them, and you knew that he took advantage of his time in the parks. Does he consider that infidelity? Interested, you glanced again at the clock and then turned to your desk, quickly clicking through your emails to make sure you had nothing to do. I’ll just … You pulled your phone out, opened Reddit, and started doing research. I know he’s not everyone else, but I wonder what other people think of sleeping with the…

Nearly a half hour later, you were floored by the fact that it was relatively evenly split between people that considered going to bed with Hosts cheating and those that didn’t care since they weren’t real people, and couldn’t form lasting attachments. But even though the Hosts can’t remember things, the people… Sighing, you put your phone back down, tapping your fingers on the desk. I wonder how I’d feel about my husband or boyfriend or...

There were pictures on the subreddit that were taken from the original Delos and park sites, and you had to admit that all of the Hosts pictured were gorgeous - men and women alike. So it was perfect for him. You thought of Logan in the park - riding horses and shooting guns and hitting an unsuspecting Host with his full smile, and realized that they - unlike you - wouldn’t have told him to stop, wouldn’t have been able to resist him, because they were designed not to. So it’s not a challenge, then. You tapped your fingers again, narrowing your eyes at the screen and then standing, deciding to take your break. I wonder how real those things are, anyway. Does it feel real?

Before you could stop yourself, you grabbed your phone, picking it up and unlocking it, navigating to Logan’s text messages. I know you’re in the park and won’t answer for a while, but … I’m sitting here and wondering: how real are they? When you’re with the Hosts, does it feel like a human? I could just wait and ask, but if I do, I’d talk myself out of it. Do people get pissed about what happens in the parks? It’s so strange to me. And I’m rambling now so I apologize but … I have to know, Logan. You sent the message and then laughed at yourself, wondering how many times he’d been asked. But I’ll never have the chance to find out, I’m just… curious. Stepping outside, you turned your face up toward the sun, smiling. Wonder what Ariella thinks of it. Or if she’s been to the parks with him. But after a few minutes, even that thought had disappeared, replaced with only more questions about the parks and the Hosts - and about the design and planning behind them.

---

You were surprised to get a text from Juliet the following day, the woman simply saying hello and asking how you’d been. Weird. I wonder if Logan asked her to message me? But you replied, not thinking anything of it, and were shocked to find that Juliet didn’t mention Logan once the entire time you spoke, trading messages back and forth for nearly an hour. She invited you over for lunch on Sunday, which you accepted, especially after she told you Emily would be there. I want to meet her, everything I’ve heard is …

It was less of a surprise that Juliet wanted to be friendly to you than it was that Logan seemed to want to get to know you, so on Saturday morning, you headed back over to the house, a small bag packed with your bathing suit just in case.Juliet greeted you at the door, a small girl with Logan’s dark, straight hair peeking around the corner of the wall that led into the kitchen. She’s got his eyes. “Come in!” Juliet stepped to the side, waving her hand. “Emily Grace, come and meet my friend.”

You watched as the little girl stepped fully into the hallway, dressed in a frilly green dress, a small stuffed horse in one hand. “She’s really cute, Juliet.” Crouching down, you smiled at the little girl, saying hello. “I like your dress, Emily.” She stopped a foot or so away from you, tilting her head to one side and staring. That’s … Logan does that. “And your horse, too. Does she have a name?”

“She might not say anything to you, it takes a minute for her to -” Juliet spoke quietly, but Emily interrupted her, holding out the stuffed animal.

“His name is Bubble.” Bubble? “He lives at Grandpa’s.” You looked up at Juliet, even as you felt the material of the horse bumped into your arm. “Bubble.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Bubble.” You took it from her, holding it carefully as Emily eyed you, and you had the sneaking suspicion that if you stood up too quickly, the girl would not have been happy. Well. “Thank you, Emily. He’s a very … I like his spots.” Handing her the stuffed animal back, you watched as she hurried out of the room and back toward the room you’d sat in with Juliet the last time you were at the house, yelling the words ‘thank you’ as she retreated. “Bubble?”

Juliet laughed, closing the door. “Yes. Bubble. That’s the name of the horse that my dad bought her, and that one … the stuffed one? It’s from Logan, and he had it made to look like the real thing.” You felt a surge of affection for the man and it made your entire body warm, but you stayed quiet. “She’s still too little to do anything but pony rides, but my dad, he… he’s trying to be a better grandparent than he was a parent, so it’s something.”

“Your dad has a farm?” Juliet laughed as the two of you walked into the living room, the woman shaking he head.

“No, he lives in Malibu, on the coast. No room for horses. He boards them at a place in Calabasas, so it’s pretty close.” The two of you settled onto the couches, Emily quietly playing in one corner of the room. “Logan and I grew up riding, and he thought it would be something that Em and I could do with my … my ex, and…” She trailed off, her eyes on the little girl. “Do you know about William?”

“I know you got divorced, and it wasn’t a friendly split.” You chewed on your lip. “Logan hasn’t said much about him, just that they didn’t get along, and he was happy when you guys separated.”

‘Logan was actually a big reason why we split.” She looked at you, keeping her voice down. “William wasn’t a good guy. I… I saw it, but didn’t see it, you know? Logan tried to tell me, but I didn’t …” She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. It’s over now, and I was able to save my relationship with my brother, so…” Oh, I never would have… You stayed quiet, eyes on the woman because you were unsure of what to say. “And I have Emily, so it wasn’t all bad.”

“She seems like a good kid. Logan talks about her a lot.” She laughed, leaning back against the cushions and tucking both legs beneath her. “You’re on his lock screen.”

“Oh, you’ve seen his phone’s lock screen?” She arched an eyebrow at you. “Usually, he won’t let that phone -”

“I put my number in it for him, before he left the hotel?” Don’t make this out to be more than it is, Juliet. “But after he handed it to me, I got distracted and we were talking, and it went dark, so he had to unlock it again, and it was you guys.” You shrugged. “No big deal.”

“I’m just giving you a hard time.” She called out to Emily, the little girl turning her head back toward the two of you. “Tell me when you’re hungry, alright?” With a solemn nod, the little girl turned back to her toys, and Juliet went quiet again. “He’ll be back tomorrow night.”

“Logan will?” Why is she telling me this? “He said he was going to be gone for at least a week, so I figured he’d -” Juliet shook her head.

“Nope. He got a message out through one of the park’s access points to let us know he was coming home a couple days early.” I hope everything’s … “One of the new clients got sick. It wasn’t anything to do with the park, so it’s not a problem, but he just wasn’t feeling well, so they all decided to head back to Sweetwater.” Sweetwater? “That’s the main entrance. Everyone gets dropped off there, because it’s really tame compared to other parts of the park. They were already close, so instead of spending a night there and then catching the train, they just …” She held up her hands. “Left early.”

“I don’t think I could imagine leaving a place like that up until the last possible second.” You spoke without pause, wincing at the end of your sentence. “I mean, it seems like it would be so overwhelming, so much to see and do.”

“It is.” She eyed you. “But the more you’re there, the less… real it gets. You see the cracks, see the … truth.” She gave you a small smile. “I could get you in. It’s not a big deal. Send you off on a weeklong -”

“Logan said the same thing. He asked me if I wanted to go, and I don’t…” You bit down on the corner of your lip. “I don’t think that’s a place to go alone, Juliet.” You shrugged. “And like I told him, my friends and I aren’t really your target demographic financially, so…” She smiled as you finished. “What?”

“He asked if you wanted to go to the park?” Yeah, why? It’s a huge part of his life, of course he’d want to know if I was … “He really does want to be your friend, then.”

“What?” But she didn’t answer, as Emily’d made her way over to the woman and put both hands on her leg.

“Lunch.” She paused, blinking twice. “Please.” Juliet wrinkled her nose and leaned down, her arms going around Emily’s waist and lifting her, standing in the same motion.

“Come on, we can keep talking while I make lunch.”

---

You hadn’t gotten to continue your conversation about Logan while Juliet got everything ready, but you hadn’t stopped thinking about what the woman had said. Why does that mean… it shouldn’t… he’s just …

The three of you ate outside at the table on the patio, Emily devouring grilled chicken, avocado and fresh fruit while you and Juliet had salads with the same ingredients, and you were surprised at just how relaxed you were. As you ate, your eyes wandered over the yard, landing on the pool where you and Logan had spent the better part of the afternoon before moving to the fire pit, where you’d ended the night before he’d taken you home. We spent all damn day together, and it…

By the time Emily was ready to take a nap, you were slightly tired too, and instead of going back inside, you and Juliet stayed on the second patio in the bar area, stretched out on the outdoor furniture. “You going to ask me about it?” Her words interrupted your thoughts, and you turned your head toward Juliet, confused. “What I said about you and my brother?”

“About him being my friend?” She nodded. “I hadn’t planned on it, I -” But I want to know.

“Logan and I grew up really … privileged. My mom had some money, but my dad worked really hard to build Delos from the ground up, and it paid off. He’s an asshole, and wasn’t always the best father - especially to Logan - but he’s a good businessman.” This has nothing to do with … “We had a lot of opportunities that other kids didn’t. Trips and clothes and cars and … and when we were old enough? We took advantage of it.” She eyed you. “Everyone knows about Logan’s teenage years and his 20’s, but mine?” Her eyes closed. “They were just as bad, I was just more private about it.”

“Really?” You laughed. “Juliet, I wouldn’t have -”

“I didn’t have a lot of the same problems as Logan.” She let out a breath. “He’s always been the better looking one, the … in demand one, the person that …” She fluffed her hair out, head moving back and forth. “Everyone wants Logan, and it’s been like that since we were kids, so he’s always been the focus, especially after our mom died. He’s a couple years older, so everyone paid attention to him, and I was just in the background.”

“You wanted people to pay attention to you.” She agreed.

“I did, but it was exhausting. I had to try to be like him, and for him, it was just … that’s how he was. How he is.” Why does this … she’s… “So I had a couple years where I tried some things and dated some people, and it just … wasn’t what I wanted. I’d had enough of trying to get people to like me in the same way that everyone seemed to like him … so I just stopped.” She’d stood as she spoke, walking back behind the bar and emerging with two large bottles of water, handing one to you. “But Logan’s the opposite. He couldn’t turn it off if he wanted to - so if he was pushing people away, I knew there was something wrong.”

“I don’t understand.” She waited until you’d taken a large drink. “How does that -”

“You know about his... struggles, right?” She said the words slowly, as if they pained her, but you told her that you did. “So when that all happened? I saw the change in him before anyone else did. It was like he was a different person. I didn’t know what he was doing at first, but I knew something was up. He wasn’t… he was off, even with me, and …” She frowned, staring at the pool’s sparkling surface. “He just wasn’t Logan. It got a little better after William and I got divorced, but everything that he went through? It changed him.”

“Juliet, I’m sorry. I still don’t understand.” You wanted to - and didn’t want to offend her by not picking up on what she was saying. “I -”

“I know that Logan really wants to be your friend, because he’s treating you the way that he would have treated someone close to him before any of this happened - before William, before the park, before he switched from recreational drug use to … to not caring whether or not he’d wake up after going to bed.” Hearing her put it so bluntly made you gasp, one hand rising to cover your mouth. Oh, Logan. “He doesn’t lie. He always tells the truth and says what he’s really thinking. But that doesn’t mean that he makes an effort, if that makes sense.” She sat up, adjusting her position on the couch to face you. “And with you, he’s making an effort.”

“Juliet, we don’t… it’s only been a couple weeks. He’s not doing any -”

“No, that’s just it, though.” She licked her lips. “How do I explain this to you without making him sound like a …” Scrubbing a hand over her face, Juliet took a deep breath. “If Logan doesn’t want you in his life, he won’t make any effort to keep you there. He doesn’t need to, because there’s always going to be someone else to step in, even now.” Even though he’s engaged, you mean. “He’s different now. And I know that I keep saying that, and you have no idea what it …” she swore, and for a second, you felt as though you were sitting outside with Logan and not his sister. “Can I be blunt with you? Like, really blunt?” You nodded, narrowing your eyes. “A few years ago, if you wouldn’t have slept with Logan when he got you and your friend back to that hotel room? You probably wouldn’t have had another chance to spend time with him.”

Sucking in a breath, you stared at her. Hearing it makes it sound … “Juliet, I -”

“And if you had seen him again? And you’d turned him down a second time?” She laughed, the sound carrying on the warm, dry air. “He would have forgotten about you before he’d even left the room.” She leaned in, her fingertips pressed into the cushions you were sitting on. “I can see it, even now, the way you’re reacting to how I’m… you like him.”

“Of course I like him, Juliet, he’s -”

“That’s not what I mean.” She rolled her eyes. “I mean that you like him, as in you find him attractive and -”

“He’s engaged, Juliet. It doesn’t matter how good looking I think he is, or how much I like spending time with him. We’re going to be friends, and … that’s it.” She watched you without speaking, waiting for you to continue. “So what changed him? Meeting Ari-” Juliet’s laugh was louder than you’d expected, her eyes closing before her head tilted back.

“No, Logan was still… Logan long after the two of them met for the first time.” So he wasn’t sleeping with just her, even after they...

“But you said he was -”

“Yes. But he was still my brother, still… himself, under all of the other bullshit. He did what he knew, what he was used to, and that didn’t… to tell you the truth,” she continued, moving closer. “It’s a little strange, even now, to see him so …” She curled her lip. “But sometimes, I think that this Logan? The Logan that we’ve gotten to really know since he got clean and involved in Em’s life? This might actually be the real Logan.”

“As opposed to… what?” You were confused, because you knew that in her mind, she was making perfect sense, but to you, she was all over the place. “You seemed to think that him being different was …”

“It is a good thing.” Her expression changed, Juliet growing much more thoughtful. “For the most part.” What does … “I love not seeing him trying to hide his arms, or… or not wearing clothes are are slightly too big to hide how much weight he’s lost. Seeing him back where he belongs - at the head of Delos - is something that I hoped for even when I was married to William, and not worrying about seeing him in the tabloids because of someone new, or a scandal every other week is …” Juliet gave you a smile. “But at what cost?” Cost? What? “Seeing him with Ariella is …” Juliet paused. “You’ll see, if you ever meet her.”

“Why would I meet his fiancée, Juliet? That doesn’t make any sense. I don’t need to -” I don’t want to meet her, I don’t want to… “From what he says, she isn’t even here often, so there’d be no …”

“You’re right.” The woman relaxed against the couch cushions, her eyes moving over the yard. “Can I ask you something, though?” She met your eyes again, a serious look in them. “If you’d met Logan, and he wasn’t engaged, what would you …” Is she really asking me this? Is she…

You wanted to be honest with the woman. Her affirmation that Logan was, in fact honest - and her willingness to tell you about herself and her life gave you confirmation that the Delos siblings valued honesty above all else. But does it … “I wouldn’t have slept with him after meeting him at Whole Foods, I can tell you that much.” She snorted and you continued. “I knew of Logan before we met, so I would have put two and two together even without the magazines in front of my face, but … I don’t know.” You began picking at the fringe on the hem of your shorts. “I have no interest in being a one night stand, or doing something for a story, or for the … thrill of it.”

“So even if he was single, you wouldn’t have tried to -” Shaking your head, you drew your lower lip into your mouth, thinking.

“Not right away, no. And if that meant that I lost out on my chance to do more than talk with him?” Your shoulders rose and fell. “I don’t mean I need to be in a relationship with someone for things to be physical, but I don’t make it a habit of picking men up at the grocery store, or sleeping with them while my friends are passed out in the other room.” Taking a deep breath and holding it for a few seconds, you blinked. “And if what you’re saying, and what he says is true, if he’d been single, then he probably wouldn’t even have looked twice at me, because he would have had plenty of options.” You weren’t fishing for compliments, nor were you putting yourself down - it was the truth. “Everyone that Logan’s been seen with is -”

“Using him.” She spoke plainly, her words surprising you. “He knows it, I know it, my dad knows it … they know it, too. Sure, there mighta been a couple of them that weren’t 100% doing that, but … it doesn’t matter how pretty you are, or how handsome if all you’re going to do is fuck someone for bragging rights. He’s a fucking person, and not one of the Hosts.” Is that really what it’s like for him? What it’s been like for him? “I appreciate you being honest with me.”

“I have no reason not to be, Juliet.” You took a long drink from your water bottle, thinking. “Same with him. Why would I lie to someone just because I thought it would make me … that’s unnecessary.” You set the bottle down, holding your hands together on your lap. And I’m not a good enough liar. “I’ve got nothing to gain in this, not really. And I definitely don’t want to be another person that hurts him, or takes advantage of him, or …”

“I knew I liked you.” She reached forward, checking the time on her phone. “Em’s gonna be waking up in a little while, so we should go back inside, but …” Juliet watched you for a few seconds, her warm brown eyes searching your face. “You’re not like … you know what? I think you’re going to be good for my brother.” Though you appreciated the comment, you felt slight disappointment at it. If she thinks that about me, then what does that say about everyone else he knows?

---

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serendipitee · 4 years

Note

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEA!! i hope you've had a lovely day so far <3 can i get meet-cute no. 44 spiced with some jukebox please?

AAAAH! THANK YOU! It was pretty good, got chocolate cake which always makes a day so much better 😂 thanks for the prompt and I hope you like it!!💜

44. You fix your hair in the reflection of a window to see them smiling at you through it.

Luke was late. Rehearsal had lasted a little longer than anticipated but he had been so wrapped up in creating the perfect riff with Bobby, that he had completely forgotten about his shift.

Only after Alex had ended their session by reminding them of his date with Willie, had Luke realized how late it was. He had changed in the garage, tying the tie while rushing out. Throwing his bike against the back alley’s wall, he had hurried to the front entrance.

Reggie had helped him land the job at the café a little over a month ago. The owner was the father of the kid their bassist sometimes babysat and Luke had been late so often, Ray had given him the last warning just two days ago.

He cursed under his breath, as he stumbled over the uneven sidewalk. Taking his hat off, he stopped in front of the café’s window, running a hand through his hair. It stood every which way just like it always did and Luke was so busy with trying to make it seem like had used a comb sometime today, that he caught her gaze way too late.

His hands froze, brain screeching to halt because even with the glass’ reflection, he realized that she was beautiful and very obviously laughing. Bashfully, he bit his lip, rubbed his neck.

She didn’t break eye contact, though. Not when he stepped away from the window, not when he took the three steps to the front door or stepped through it.

Luke tried to calm down his rapidly beating heart. He could always say it was due to racing here but when her smile grew a little bit bigger as he came closer, he knew it was a lie.

“Hi,” he said when he was finally only a step or two away. His hands played with his hat nervously because without the glass separating them, she was even prettier.

“Hey,” she answered.

“Luke!” Ray’s voice came from the counter and he flinched.

Right. Work. And he was late. Again. Spinning around, Luke started talking a mile a minute, throwing on his most winning smile. “I am so sorry, Ray, but Bobby really needed my help with that riff and I know, you said last warning, but maybe I can work for free this weekend. Just not Saturday evening, because we have a gig then but I can always take the Sunday morning shift, right? I know Kayla doesn’t like that one and you sure as hell wanna spend Sunday with your family, right and—”

“Luke,” Ray said again, holding up his hand to stop him from talking.

Taking a deep breath, Luke hoped he had convinced his boss enough about his good will to keep the job. He could really use the money and Ray was the best boss he had so far. Also, it certainly would make a better impression on the girl if he wasn’t fired right in front of her.

His boss sighed, doing his best to keep a firm expression. “Fine, take the Sunday morning shift but I actually wanted to introduce to my daughter. She’s gonna help out during the summer break.”

“Oh cool!” Luke exclaimed, heart beating more freely because he wasn’t getting fired. At least, not today. “Where is she?”

Somebody behind him cleared their throat. He spun around meeting brown eyes and a smirk. “Hi, I’m Julie,” she said and his heart stuttered, because… “The daughter.”

“Oh…,” he breathed out. Only now did his eyes travel past her face and he recognized the same uniform he was wearing. He swallowed because it looked way better on her and maybe he shouldn’t check out his boss’ daughter right in front of him.

“It’s nice to meet you, Dad’s been telling me an awful lot about how you’re always late.” She chuckled.

Luke rubbed the back of his neck, trying to will down the blush that dared to creep into his cheeks. His mouth opened and closed for a few times, brain not working properly because she was still smiling at him, eyebrows raised. If she was to stick around, he’d probably mess up even more orders than usual. Especially, if she kept looking at him like that.

A hand landed on his shoulder. “Table six is waiting to order,” said Ray behind him.

He nodded automatically, eyes still trained on Julie who tapped her fingers against the tray she was holding.

Working with Julie wasn’t as bad as he had imagined. He didn’t mess up more than usual, she even laughed at a few of his jokes and when their hands touched as they reached for the milk, she blushed really prettily.

Luke made sure not to be late for work after that. He even was early, if it meant he could sneak a kiss or two in the back alley before their shift together.

#juke fic #jatp fic #juke #julie x luke #coffeeshop au because juke as co-workers would be too adorable #my writing #meet cutes

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jadekitty777 · 3 years

Text

On Your Six, Chapter 2

And thus we come to another day, another chapter.

Day 2: Stealing Hoodies for @taiqrowweek

Rating: T for this chapter, M for overall

Words: 3k

Summary: Qrow was what most of society would call a small-town criminal. But to those oppressed, he hoped only to be a healer. In an effort to make a change in the world, he moves from kingdom to kingdom, searching for branded omegas in need. His goal? To turn the derogatory words the reformatories forced them to bear on their skin into works of art.

Then one day, his past catches up to him in the form of Taiyang, his former best friend, with a brand of his own stained onto his skin and a plea for help in his eyes. Qrow has no choice but to answer, even if it means he’d have to face his mistakes once and for all.

[An ABO-style universe in a modern-day style Remnant. No Grimm, because people are the real monsters in this one]

Ao3 Link: On Your Toes

Tai rolled in Sunday with a brisk breeze and a hint of last night’s rain following him. The awkward timidness he’d had, had evaporated quicker than the puddles outside, burned away into steely determination as he got right down to business. “Alright, so, how do you want me?”

Qrow nodded to his bed, the recliner having been pushed up alongside it. His kit was sitting on the nightstand. “Take off your shirt and lie down.”

“Gee, at least buy me dinner first.”

He supposed he walked right into that one.

“Hah. Let’s see if you have any jokes left after we pass the fourth hour.” He strode over to his chair, fetching a roll of paper towels on his way. “I told you we’d be at this for a while. Trust me, you’ll be glad to be in a more comfortable position.”

Qrow had calculated it. He’d have six sessions per letter. At eight to ten hours per session, he’d have a range of 48 to 60 hours per design. It seemed like a lot of time, but drawing on paper wasn’t quite the same as drawing on people. Paper didn’t need potty breaks, for example, and it tended to stay stationary the entire time. Add on to the fact this was easily the biggest project he’d ever undertaken, and he knew he was going to need every second he could get.

At least I won’t be enduring it alone, he thought as he watched Tai kick off his shoes and shirt and climb onto the bed. Qrow poured the alcohol onto one of the paper towels, and as he dabbed at the other’s skin, he noticed the face the other man was making. “Sorry, guess it’s a little strong.”

“It’s not that.” Tai said, rubbing his nose. “Uh, not to be your maid or anything but, you really need to wash your sheets.”

For a split second, Qrow was offended. Then the realization hit. “Oh. You’re smelling the ink.” He indicated the row of bottles organized in the case. The only one he’d need today, the black, was sitting next to his rotary machine. “I mix it with my own pheromones. It helps neutralize the stench.”

The omega reached for the little bottle, giving it a whiff. His eyebrows shot up and suddenly, he was staring at it like it held the meaning of life. “That’s… incredible. But won’t that give me away?”

“Not when your RO can’t smell her way out of a canteen.” They were all betas. Being the neutral dynamic meant there was no risk of ‘going soft’ on their parolee like an omega might, nor get over-protective like an alpha absolutely would. But it also meant that after Qrow finished relining the tattoos, the dramatic shift to Tai’s scent would be almost undetectable. “And if she does notice, just tell her you’re trying out a new perfume.”

“That smells like matchsticks and blueberries?”

“You’ll be fine. You’re good at improvising.”

As Tai eased himself back down, he finished sanitizing his back, then moved on to getting himself ready. He double-checked the machine, made sure the parts were in place and the wire running back to the outlet was untangled and slack. Taped the paper copy of the design over the edge of his nightstand and uncapped the ink bottle. “So, this is how this works.” Qrow said as he pulled on his gloves, “You need to be as still as possible. We’re gonna have a five-minute break every hour, give you a chance stretch and move around. We’ll stop a bit longer half way in or so to eat. But if you need me to stop for any other reason just let me know. And uh, fair warning – when I start tattooing over the letter itself, it’s gonna hurt like a bitch.”

Tai nodded. “Got it.”

“Okay.” He dipped the needle and turned on the pen, the quiet buzzing filling the room. “Here we go.”

The moment needle met skin, he felt muscle tense under his hand. Spotted the way Tai’s toes curled in his socks and his face screwed shut. Qrow continued on slowly as he looped one line from the top of the S and connected it to down the middle, then did it again from the bottom part of the S. By the time the S had turned into an 8, the omega had relaxed again, sighing softly. He took that as a sign to continue and started coloring in the new side.

Hour one passed in complete silence.

“So, how’s it looking?” Tai asked, swiveling his head around. If he tried any harder, he might become an owl.

Qrow watched him from the stove. “Most of the line art on the top is finished.” He turned on the burners for the kettle and pot of water. “Should be fine to get the rest done in a few hours.”

“I can’t believe how fast it’s going.”

“Yeah well, this is the easy part.” He opened the pantry, eyeing over the options. “Wait until we get to coloring. I have to switch between needles for shading and clean between them.”

There was a dragging noise as one of the dining room chairs was pulled back. “I’m sorry it’s so much work. We don’t have to do all that, if you don’t want.”

Qrow was grateful only his shelves could see his scowl. He breathed out slow, pulled down the pork-flavored ramen packets, saying casually as he went back to the stove, “I mean if you’re too scared to keep going…”

“I didn’t say that! I’m just trying to be nice.” Tai grumbled the last past.

I don’t need you to be nice to me! Frustration welled in him, but he forced it back down. Getting angry wasn’t going to help. Even if this extremely complacent, easily guilted Tai made him want to go out and burn down every Gods’ damned reformatory there was. “Forget about it. I’m too much of a perfectionist to half-ass my work anyways.” He tried to brush off. But now Tai had that kicked puppy look that told him he was feeling bad, which only made Qrow feel bad in turn, so he deflected instead, “I mean, unless it’s too much for you. You’ve been quiet. Is it hurting that bad?”

“Oh, no it’s fine. I, uh,” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Didn’t want to distract you.”

“You won’t.” He cracked the bags in half twice, tearing open the pack. “And it helps pass the time.” He dropped the ramen noodlesinto the water that was just starting to bubble and got the mugs down for tea, absolutely refusing to look at the other lest he read all over his face just how much he missed talking to him.

“Well… besides illegal tattooing in the tiniest apartment known to man on the shady side of town, what else have you been up to?”

The kettle was picked up just as it began to whistle. Like the cups filling with water, Qrow opened his mouth and let the words flow out just as easy.

As evening approached, another storm blew in. Rain drops smattered against the window every time the wind picked up, drowning out the noise of his pen. Qrow had rearranged his furniture, putting the recliner and nightstand in opposite positions so he could work on the lower half of the design in the 8. His focus was completely on the coastline coming to life over tanned skin.

“Remember that time we snuck out your window so we could put all those plastic rats on Professor Port’s porch for April Fool’s Day?”

Well, maybe not completely.

Qrow snickered. They had camped out in the bushes until dawn, just so they could take the TA’s picture when he came out to get his morning paper. “His face was priceless.”

“Not sure the punishment was worth it though.” Tai bemoaned.

“It was only a week’s detention.”

“For you. I got three month’s grounding on top of it.”

He reinked his pen. “Which you immediately broke by coming to my house every day.”

Tai took the brief pause as a chance to scratch his nose. “I never would have got caught if dad didn’t go home early that one time.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me. My ears are still ringing from that lecture.” He flipped back on the pen and continued working on the islands that would split the sea from the sky.

The omega cleared his throat, deepening his voice just enough it was an almost disturbingly perfect imitation of his father, “‘If you don’t want to land yourself into juvie, then you’ll stop leading my son into a life of delinquency.’”

Qrow grinned, continuing for him and really hamming it up, “’Don’t you know my delicate boy’s future depends on finding a proper and upstanding alpha?’”

“He didn’t say delicate.” But Tai was laughing with him.

“Might as well have.” It wouldn’t have been too off-base for the Xiao Longs. They’d always been the traditional, overbearing types, trying to jumpstart every little bit of their only son’s future in every possible avenue. When they’d been young, it always seemed like Tai was going to some lesson or appointment. Swimming. Woodworking. Jeet Kune Do. It had been so excessive it had given his own mother ideas – but at least she let Raven and him choose what they wanted to learn.

After looking through the primordial alpha courses, Raven had chosen fencing.

Qrow had wanted to go with her but there was nothing like that in the omega pamphlets he’d been given. In the end, he kicked his feet all the way to his first few art lessons.

His dad had been pretty ticked off they’d wasted the money when, a few years later, puberty had Qrow shooting up past six feet and presenting as an alpha.

But that was nothing compared to the nuclear war that went off when, just shortly after his fourteen birthday, the Xiao Longs discovered Tai was an omega. The lessons stopped and the strict rules started. No going out past seven o’ clock. No cursing. No dating. No kissing. No sex. And especially, no alphas in the house. Ever.

By the time Tai was fifteen, he’d already broken every single one of them.

Qrow, who hadn’t exactly been an angel himself, thought it was hilarious and maybe encouraged him a bit more than he should have. But honestly, what did anyone expect of either of them? After being caged in like a defenseless pup, he was finally allowed break free and be a little reckless. Meanwhile, Tai refused to be shoved into that same cage, smashing through the doors all on his own. They’d been quite a pair, back in the day.

Nostalgia hit him in a wave. “How are your folks doing these days?”

“They’re fine. Dad’s started a new garden. And Mom’s been talking about renovating the old cabin house we used to vacation at. Said it would be a good place for the girls to enjoy. I was gonna help but…” Tai trailed off, his eyes glazing over a bit. “They wrote to me a few times while I’d been…. yanno.”

Something bitter built in his chest. A long-forgotten fury that had weighed on him when his mother had likewise been ripped from their family to stay at a reformatory and the only comforts he’d got was from the Xiao Longs reassuring him she’d come back as a ‘better omega’. “I’m certain they were just bursting with encouragement and support.”

“Definitely isn’t winning any motivational speech awards.” He joked humorlessly.

There was a quiet lull. Qrow took it as a chance to re-ink and stretch out the crick stiffening his fingers.

As he lowered the needle once more, Tai spoke up, hesitant. “What about you? Heard from your family at all?”

He frowned, knowing there was only one of those two people he actually cared to hear about. He indulged him regardless. “Well, you know my old man. Probably still doesn’t even know I’m gone.” He tapped his pen down, drawing the m-shapes that were meant to be a couple of gulls flying away in the sky. “As for Raven, haven’t seen her for years. Not sure she could find me.” When he paused to survey his work, he couldn’t help but think that the shapes really could have been any birds. “Even if she could, doubt she’d want to.”

The kicked puppy look was back. “I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault.” Qrow lied, as if the last argument he and Raven ever had wasn’t entirely about Taiyang. But he didn’t need to know about that.

“You left? Raven you can’t leave!”

“Don’t growl at me. And anyways, what’s the problem?”

“The problem is Tai’s your mate. You guys have a daughter!”

“And that means I’m bound to him for life? We made a mistake! We were dumb kids. It happens.”

“So you just pack up your shit and tell him ‘good fucking luck’? He loves you! How can you act like that doesn’t matter?”

“…”

“Well?!”

“Really, little brother?”

“Wh-”

“If you want to go and play house with him, be my guest. But don’t project your feelings onto me. This is my life. My choice.”

“…Yeah. Yeah, I guess throwing people out of your life is a fucking choice. Just don’t be surprised when you get the same in return.”

“Are you seriously-”

“Get out. And until you get your head out of your ass, don’t bother coming back!”

Qrow taped down the bandage over Tai’s back, the antibiotic cream he’d spread along the new tattoo squishing against the adhesive. He ran through the aftercare steps almost subconsciously. “Keep this on until you go to bed. When you do take it off, wash it with warm water and soap. Do that a few times a day tomorrow and the next day too. If anything seems wrong, just call me.”

“Got it.” Tai reached for his shirt. At least he’d had the foresight to bring a button up. As he pulled it on, he gave Qrow a crooked little smile that made him look adorably boyish. “Same time next week then?”

“Uh, yeah.” He slipped off the bed, making a great show of looking for the other’s shoes. His cheeks felt a little less hot by the time he was returning to the bedside with them. “We’ll have to work on the U next. I’ll keep sending you designs, but a little direction would help.”

Tai slipped into his shoes, getting to his feet. “I don’t really have the eye for this kind of stuff. Just pick something easy.”

“Feel like I’m having a case of déjà vu here.” Qrow huffed, tapping a finger to the center of Tai’s chest. “This is your body Tai, not mine. So could you please put just a mite bit more effort into something you’re gonna have to wear the rest of your life?”

The other’s eyes widened before he looked away. He made an aborted motion towards his neck, fell short, and worried the corner edge of his collar between his fingers. “Could you do words?”

“Yeah.” He replied haltingly, taken aback by the sudden shift. “I’ll probably want to craft stencils to keep the script nice though – and no, it’s not hard.”

Tai nodded, another one of those not-quite smiles on his face. “Then I think I do know what I want for this one. I’ll send you some pictures later tonight.”

“Well… good! See was that so hard?”

“Immensely.” He answered, laying it on thick as honey.

Qrow jabbed him in the shoulder. “Don’t oversell it prima donna. You should start heading home, unless you’re planning on doing a rendition of Singing in the Rain out there.”

Tai spared a look to the window. “It’s really coming down out there, isn’t it?” The sky had darkened with the setting sun, making the already heavy clouds appear thick and ominous. Rain battered against his window at a continuous rate. The minute the omega left the complex, he was going to be soaked. “Think this’ll be okay?” He waved vaguely to his left shoulder where the tattoo began on the other side of.

“Mm, probably. But I guess a little extra cover wouldn’t hurt.” He crossed over to his little box of a closet, rummaging through the sparse selection. “This’ll work. It’s a bit oversized for me, so it should be perfect for you. Here.”

He snapped the black hoodie off its hanger, tossing it. Tai caught it. “You’re sure?”

“What are you gonna do to it? Dye it pink?”

“Well now that’s a thought. It’d match your eyes.”

“My eyes aren’t pink!”

Tai’s laughter was muffled in fabric as he gingerly slipped the hoodie on, being as mindful as possible of his back. By the time his head popped back out, his hair was all mussed up.

It was unfairly cute and Qrow tried very hard not to think about it as he walked him to the door.

Tai stepped into the hall, then paused, turning back to him. He reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Hey uh, thank you. For all this. You have no idea how much this means to me.”

Qrow was pretty sure the touch was electric, because he was suddenly paralyzed. How he even got his jaw to work was a miracle in and of itself. “Don’t mention it.”

The omega hesitated, as if he wanted to argue, but only said, “Sure. I’ll see you soon Qrow.”

He wasn’t sure how long he stood there, but it was long after Tai had left the hall that he finally found the strength to close the door, slumping against the wood with a pitiful groan.

He thought he was over this. He should be over this. He wasn’t a lovesick teen anymore and this wasn’t a romantic comedy where after a bunch of wild, misleading antics, everything came together in the end. He’d lost his chance – twice over apparently. It was useless to try now.

So why did his stupid, pathetic heart still yearn?

“Come on Qrow.” He knocked his head against the door, hoping to rattle some sense into himself. “You did this for six years. You can do it again for six months.”

As he trod his way back to his bed, falling into it only to realize it smelt like Tai and would continue to every Sunday for weeks, he burrowed his head in his pillow and screamed.

Six was becoming a very unlucky number for him.

#qrow branwen #taiyang xiao long #Taiqrow #taiqrowweek #rwby #fanfiction #Chase Firekitten's Tale

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heyyyharry · 4 years

Text

Chapter 14: To The Boy Next Door

(from the My Girl Trilogy: Stay Mine)

…in which they play a game.

Word count: 4.7k

AU: actor!Harry, older!Harry, younger!Y/N, (4-year age gap).

Wattpad link (Thea as Y/N)

ANNOUNCEMENT: The last chapter was supposed to be released on July 1, BUT I have two final exams on that same week, so I’ll have no choice but to move the schedule forward.

Last My Girl update: July 8, 2020. (July 3: Tumblr preview and full chapter on Patreon).

One year later

“Come in.”

When Asher entered the room, Gemma almost didn’t recognize him. He’d got a beard now, and he wasn’t wearing a suit. If she hadn’t known the charming Asher in the past, she would be so shocked to find out he was the CEO’s son. Too bad she didn’t care enough to wonder what had happened to him after his business had gone bankrupt because his father had refused to finance it. Now he was just a regular accountant.

His eyes went wide when he saw her sitting with his dad in the CEO office.

Hello, Asher, she thought, yet gave him nothing but a polite nod as if they were meeting for the first time.

“Asher, I suppose you remember Gemma?” asked his father with a sigh.

“Yes,” Asher mumbled, his gaze falling to the floor.

Of course he remembered her. Abusers always remembered their victims.

His dad looked from him back to Gemma. Hands folded on the desk, he said, “Gemma is our new COO. I hope you will have no trouble working for her.”

Asher’s head jerked up as if he’d just heard a gunshot. And Gemma, of course, was the one holding the gun.

She relished his astonishment and cracked a smile as she rose from her seat and walked toward him. She extended her hand, but he didn’t take it.

“Working for her?” he asked his dad, who replied with a stern expression.

“Yes. She’s your new boss.”

Gemma broke into a smirk, still holding out her hand in the space between them. Asher’s eyes had grown so big they nearly took over his entire face. “You,” he hissed at her, “I can't believe you weaselled your way into this company.”

“Oh, no.” Gemma frowned pretentiously and dropped her hand down to her side. “I’ve been a shareholder for almost a year. I’ve done more for this company in that short amount of time than you have your whole life.”

He thinned his lips and glared at her, unable to muster a single word.

She hated him but respected his father. And what was better as revenge than making sure she took everything he wanted? First, his father’s affection. Soon, his father’s company.

“I don’t want to make this unpleasant for you, Asher,” her voice dropped so low as she leaned in so only the two of them could hear. “Or maybe I do. So you better be a nice employee, because I wouldn't be sorry to kick you out of here.”

His face dimmed as she stepped away. If there was a camera, she’d take a picture and put it in a frame. Though she doubted this would be the last time she got to see that defeated look on his face.

"See you around, Ash," she said, placing a hand on her hip as she breezed right past him out of the room.

Two interns, a blonde and a dark-skinned girl, rose from their cubicles and rushed up to her as she was heading for the lift.

“Excuse me,” the blonde said timidly. “Are you...our new COO?”

“Y-Yes, yes, I am.” Gemma worked up a smile and the girls giggled to each other like teenagers.

“Congratulations and welcome!” said the dark-skinned one, who said her name was Marie and her friend was Claria. Gemma assumed they were going to fangirl about her brother, but then Marie said, “We love your sister-in-law’s book. We’re such big big fans.”

It took Gemma a second. “Y/N? She and Harry aren’t–”

“Future sister-in-law,” Claria corrected her friend, looking nervously from Marie back to Gemma. “We’ve...heard some rumours. Can you confirm or deny it?”

“I cannot. But I’ll let her know about you girls.”

The girls grinned like the Cheshire Cat, and Gemma could tell they were trying their best not to freak out. She waved them goodbye and hastened into the lift before the door closed.

Her phone buzzed with a new text.

Isey: Lunch? :)

Lunch :) she replied, biting back a grin.

Another notification popped up. A reply from Harry's girl. Gemma rolled her eyes as she remembered lending Harry her phone a couple of weeks ago. He'd changed most names in her contacts and she'd only managed to change back a few of them.

Harry's girl: Thanks for the birthday wish, Gem! (heart emoji)

You're welcome! Is Harry coming home today?

Harry's girl: I hope not. But idk.

We never know. How can you STAND him? Ugh.

Harry's girl: I can't lol.

Harry's girl: Anyway, what was his reaction?

Gemma knew right away whom Y/N was talking about.

Priceless, she responded.

Harry's girl: QUEEN. Make his life a living hell.

Oh I will. Certainly.

The door slid open with a ding, and Gemma tucked the phone into her bag. Her assistant was waiting outside to direct her to her new office. With a smile on her face, she stepped out of the lift and shook the assistant's hand.

She was so ready for this new beginning.

“Good aaaaaafternoon, girlfriend! Are you feeling twenty-two?”

Y/N laughed hoarsely as she blinked a few times to let her vision get used to the light from the windows opposite the bed. “You’re embarrassing,” she said, yawning.

On the phone, Harry gasped. “Did you just wake up?!”

“I stayed up all night talking to you and had a zoom meeting with Laura this morning. Besides, it’s Sunday.”

“It’s your birthday.”

“Duh.” She grinned at the ceiling and exhaled. “I’m twenty-two now. I’m like...old.”

“Ouch. Well, aren’t you supposed to get ready for the book signing?”

“Book signing is tomorrow. Bad boyfriend.”

The sound of his laugh made her heart leap. She missed him so much. He’d been in New York for two weeks and wouldn’t be back until next Thursday, which meant she’d have to spend this birthday without him. She wasn’t sure if she should let him know she wished he were here. She really did. But she also didn’t want him to drop everything and fly back to her for only one night. He’d done that before and it'd been romantic, still, she never wanted him to do it again.

“To prove that I’m not a bad boyfriend,” he said, snapping her back to the moment. “I have a surprise for you.”

She sat up straight and whipped her head to the door. “Goddamn it, Harry,” she huffed, “if you tell me you’re standing right outside–”

“No!” He burst out laughing. “No, no, no, I’m still in New York.”

She sighed in relief, but couldn’t help feeling a bit disappointed.

“My surprise is in the pocket of my favourite suit,” he said.

She had no idea what he might have up his sleeves (quite literally). Still, she rolled out of bed, shoved her feet into her slippers, and padded out of the room.

Two years ago on this same day, he’d brought her to the roof of an abandoned building, where they’d watched the night city and eaten his homemade cupcakes. On her twenty-first birthday, they hadn’t been talking. And so this year, she’d suspected that he must have planned something extravagant to surprise her, even though he wasn’t home to celebrate with her. The surprise had come a bit earlier than expected.

She switched on the light in the walk-in closet, which was as large as her old flat. His favourite suit was the one he’d worn on Grammy’s night. Sparkling dark velvet to match the aesthetic of her silvery mermaid gown, which, unfortunately, she hadn’t got a chance to show off to the world.

She stuck her hand into the breast pocket of the jacket and pulled out a folded piece of paper. “Found it."

“Go on. Read it,” he encouraged.

“If it says ‘Happy Birthday, smiley face’, I’ll strangle you when you come back.”

A laugh burst right through him. “Your choking kink is getting out of hand, babe.”

“Shut up.” She huffed, unfolding the note. “Should have said I loved you,” she read aloud. “What does that mean?”

“You can ask for my help only once. Call me when you’ve found the fifth clue.”

“Wait!”

But he’d already hung up.

She almost called him back but then decided not to. She didn't want to waste her only chance to ask for help.

Classic treasure hunt, she thought, rereading the sentence.

The prize would be her birthday present for sure. Maybe he’d hidden it in the wood somewhere. A normal boyfriend would just have the birthday present delivered, or leave it on the table or in the garage, not challenge his girlfriend’s two only active brain cells with a children’s game. But Y/N wasn’t a normal girlfriend. And as much as she hated working for something other than her writing, a part of her was excited.

“Should have said I loved you,” she thought out loud, then snapped her fingers and rushed across the hallway to his library.

Two years ago, she’d told him she’d loved him for the first time and received silence in return. In this very room, he’d watched her leave.

She stood in front of the giant bookcase, which he’d had installed a month after she’d officially moved in. Most of these books were from her collection. On a shelf in the middle stood three framed photos of them. Them in Paris. Them with their families on a vacation last summer. Them at her graduation.

She flipped each frame over to check the back, but none had what she was looking for. She tapped her foot impatiently on the carpet while assessing the rest of the bookcase. It didn’t take her too long to notice that one book was upside down.

P.S. I Love You by Cecelia Ahern.

Of course. Of-fucking-course.

She rolled her eyes, feeling a smile stretching her lips as she took the book from the shelf and opened it to the first page. There was a post-it note that said:

Congrats, babe. You’ve found it. Next clue: Where the magic happens ;)

‘Where the magic happens.’ If it wasn’t sexual, the winky face had made sure that it was.

Could it be their bed? Nope. She'd slept there last night.

Could it be the first place they’d had sex?

Could the next clue be inside that car?

She jolted with a start and dashed out of the library, and as soon as she reached the stairs, she suddenly halted.

No. She didn’t remember which car they’d had sex in for the first time, and he’d got a whole collection of cars. It’d take forever to search every single one. That wasn’t the right answer.

Sighing, she stood on the first stair and contemplated the clue again.

They used to play Treasure Hunt when they were younger. There were usually at least five or six clues, and the first three should be easy.

Could it be her flat? Most of their ‘secret relationship’ had happened in her flat. It used to be their secret kingdom. Impenetrable. Disconnected to the outside world. They’d also had their second real kiss outside her door, and she still had until the end of this month before she must return the keys to the landlord.

She wasn’t sure, and she wasn’t going to drive all the way there just to find out she was wrong.

And so she decided to call him.

“Let me guess,” he said as soon as the beeping stopped. “You’re either super impatient or your fairy godmother appeared and helped you find all five clues.”

She rolled her eyes. “Third clue. Is it your car or my flat?”

“My car?” He sounded confused, which gave her the impression that she might have got it wrong.

Her cheeks burnt as she said, “We had sex for the first time in your car.”

“No, not my car, but damn, I should have thought of that.”

“So it’s my flat?”

“Are you sure you want to ask me now?”

“Yes.”

“Yes,” he smugly confirmed. “It’s your flat. Now you’re on your own until the final clue.”

“Fuck,” she grunted and pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Don’t worry,” he said. “I thought you’d have trouble with this one, too. I mean, we fuck everywhere these days.”

“If my birthday present isn’t worth all this, we won’t be fucking ever again.”

He gasped at the threat, and she could picture him wearing that stupid crooked smile as he told her, “Good luck, kid. I believe in you.”

She found the next clue on Thumper’s lap.

When she’d moved most of her furniture to Harry’s house, she’d forgotten to take the purple stuffed bunny with her. She held it under her arm and scrutinized the pink post-it note, which said:

I cannot believe you left Thumper behind. Third clue: Drunk little deer.

“Drunk little deer? What does that even mean?” Then she looked at Thumper. “Should I kick him in the balls when I see him?”

She made the rabbit nod and burst out laughing at how crazy she sounded. If anyone walked in and saw her talking to a stuffed animal, they would assume she was either crazy or drunk.

Drunk.

She was the drunk little deer. Drunk Bambi.

The answer was the place he'd seen her drunk for the first time.

Andrew recognized Y/N right from the moment she stepped into the pub. He leaned over the counter and shouted for everyone to hear, “Little girl! Good to see you again!”

“Andrew," she smiled and shouldered her way towards the bar.

He eyed her up and down as she slid onto one of the stools. “You look different. I hope you’re not here to drink again. I might have to kick you out.”

She rolled her eyes and shook her head. “You look different, too. I like your new hair.”

Andrew rubbed his shiny bald head, scowling at her as she raised a smile and rested her chin on her knuckles. Andrew might look intimidating, especially now without his hair, but he was one of the softest people she’d ever met. He’d been so kind to her during her tough times and even let her haunt his pub day and night until Harry had come for the rescue.

“You’re kind of famous now, aren’t you?” Andrew said. “I’ve read your book. It didn’t suck.”

“You have?”

He lifted one giant shoulder of his, pursing his lips. “My wife made me. She's a big fan. Your boyfriend came two weeks ago and he even signed the book for her. He said he was the one in the story.”

“My boyfriend was here?”

Andrew gave a nod.

The voices in Y/N's head started cheering like she’d just won a wrestling match. It would have been so embarrassing if she'd asked Andrew first and then found out she'd got it wrong.

“Well, did he leave...something for me? A message perhaps?”

Andrew growled as he turned away, and without a word, disappeared through a stained curtain behind him. He came back five minutes later and handed her a green post-it note with an unreadable grimace on his face.

She snatched it immediately. A laugh crackled out of her as if he’d just given her gold.

Hi babe, you’re almost there! My biggest fans (not you) have the final clue. Get back to work.

“He gave this to me when he signed the book,” Andrew said.

Y/N mumbled the words over as she tried to figure them out. Her first guess for ‘biggest fans (not you)’was Gemma and Isaac. But then she got rid of the idea because they had to be at the same place at the same time in order for this to work, and Gem and Isaac were both at work.

Which two people were together right now and were also Harry’s biggest fans?

‘Get back to work.’

Yes. That’s it!

Y/N thrust the post-it note into her bag and rose from the stool. “I’m sorry. This must be weird to you.”

“It’s quite romantic, actually," Andrew said.

“Really?”

“And weird. You two are both weird. What a perfect couple.”

“Gee, thanks.”

As she spun on her heels, Andrew called after her, “Hey, little girl. I’m sorry I said you weren’t a real writer.”

“You said that?”

“You were drunk,” he chuckled. “Anyway, bring your weird boyfriend back sometimes.”

“I will. If there’s free beer.”

“Get out of here.” He shot his finger toward the door, but it was the first time she’d seen Andrew smile with his whole face.

Eddie’s bookshop was busy on most Sundays. Well, it had been busy almost every day since Y/N had credited him in her latest best-selling debut novel.

She entered the shop and was immediately recognized by a group of schoolgirls, who asked her to sign their new copies of her book and questioned her about the story. She recycled the same amiable answers that didn’t give away any more than what they might already know. Since she’d already got used to the attention, the fans didn’t intimidate her anymore.

She took a selfie with the girls and bid them goodbye. Then one of the new employees told her that Eddie and Alice were sorting books at the back. She wandered along aisles until she found them. Eddie was scolding Alice for putting hardcovers in between paperbacks. Nothing got on Eddie’s nerves as much as putting hardcovers in between paperbacks.

“The hardcovers take more shelf-space so you cannot put them there! God, Alice, were you drunk when you were sorting these books?”

“I wish I were drunk now,” Alice said, and her eyes lit up as she saw Y/N. She nearly tackled Y/N to the floor with a violent hug, and Y/N returned with half as much enthusiasm.

“You’re like a Golden Retriever,” Y/N said, pulling back and cupping her friend’s face.

“Happy birthday! I was gonna send you–”

Eddie didn’t wait for Alice to finish as he pushed her aside to step forward, his face brightened like the sun. “You’re here for the clue, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I–”

“We can’t just hand it to you.” That sun-like face suddenly turned serious. “You need a password. What is Harry’s favourite book?”

Y/N arched an eyebrow at Eddie as if expecting him to say ‘gotcha!’ But he only mirrored her expression as he crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for an answer.

“Seriously?” Y/N scoffed, looking at her two friends. “He’s that narcissistic?”

Alice smirked as she raised a shoulder. “Either you answer or search this entire bookshop yourself.”

“I fucking hate him and I fucking hate both of you.” Y/N rolled her eyes upward and exhaled sharply. “Norwegian Wood.”

“Huh?”

“That’s his favourite book,” she told Alice and remembered Alice didn’t read fiction unless it was compulsory. “Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami.”

Eddie looked confused. “He loves Haruki Murakami? His books are misogynistic.”

“Harry’s got a bad taste in authors. But judging from your reactions, I suppose that is not the correct answer, and I should probably break up with my boyfriend because I don’t know what his favourite book is.”

“You do, Y/N.” Alice beamed as she leaned a shoulder against the bookcase. “You’re thinking too big. It’s pretty simple.”

“Shit. Is it my book?” Y/N asked, then pinched the bridge of her nose as Eddie began to smile. “Goddamn it, he’s like my dad times ten.”

“What did your dad do?” Eddie asked.

“He bought a bunch of copies of my book and sent them to our relatives for Christmas. It was pretty embarrassing.”

“Aww.”

“ALICE!”

“Jesus Christ!” Alice covered her ears as she shot Eddie a glare. “I’m standing right next to you.”

“Go get the clue!” Eddie flicked his fingers at her. “Go! Hurry!”

Alice rolled her eyes and flipped him off as she backed out of the aisle. Eddie ignored her and turned back to Y/N, grinning from ear to ear like he was the birthday girl. “Are you excited?”

“Not as much as you are. That’s for sure,” Y/N said and made sure he knew she was joking by giving him a toothy grin.

“I’m not gonna tell you what the surprise is, you know.”

“I’m not asking.”

Eddie’s laugh was high as he placed a hand on her shoulder. “What I can tell you is that you’re gonna love it. Too bad I cannot be there to see your reaction.”

“Trust me,” she said. “You don’t wanna see me scold Harry through the phone.”

Alice returned with a copy of My Girl and handed it to Y/N with a smile that possibly meant, ‘You’re gonna love this’.

Suspicious and somewhat elated, Y/N opened the book to the dedication page.

To Mum, Dad, and the boy next door.

Those were her words. Below was his handwriting: Hi my love :)

Curious, she turned to the first chapter. This wasn’t just another copy of her book, of which she’d got all the different covers at home. With this one, Harry had done the same thing he’d done to her journal. His handwriting was scattered across the pages. He’d underlined all the quotes he’d enjoyed and left comments about them on the side.

Y/N heard Eddie say something about how he would never write in books and Alice immediately shush him for being rude. Y/N never wrote in books, either, but she loved reading Harry’s handwritten notes. It felt like he was reading the story with her. The butterflies in her stomach went wild just from imagining him taking his time writing on each page and grinning at his own jokes. If this was the birthday surprise, she could not ask for anything more.

However, she knew he had to be more extra than this.

And there it was. Proof that this was not the surprise. On the very last page, he wrote:

Meet me where the sky meets the earth.

“Where the sky meets the earth?” she thought out loud and glanced up at Eddie, who responded with a shrug. Alice did, too. Y/N didn’t think they were lying. Harry must have told them what the surprise was, but not the answers to these cryptic messages.

Eddie patted her on the back as he wished her good luck and shooed Alice back to the front to assist the customers. Y/N was left behind to work it out on her own. She leaned against the bookcase, pondering over the words.

Hadn’t Harry said she was allowed to call him when she reached the fifth clue?

She tucked the book under her arm and pulled out the phone from the pocket of her jeans.

“Hi, babe!”

“I’ve got the fifth clue,” she blurted. “What do I do now?”

“I don’t know. Solve it?”

“Yes, smartarse. The answer is, I don’t know.”

“You’re not even thinking.”

“You said you’d help me!”

“I said I’d help you once,” he countered. “And I did. I told you to call me just so I know when you’ve reached the final clue.”

“So you’re not gonna help me with this one?”

He was quiet for a moment. “Well, I can give you a hint. What do all the places you’ve visited today have in common?”

She chewed on her lip, an arm folded over her chest. “They’re memories,” she whispered.

“That’s right,” he whispered back, like they didn’t want anyone to overhear their conversation. “This last place is a memory as well. Where the sky meets the earth. Think, kid.”

She pouted. “Can I please get another hint?”

“You don’t get to talk in a cute voice and manipulate me, Bambi,” he sighed. “Fine. Our first date.”

“Holmes Chapel?!”

He said nothing and hung up.

It took Y/N a few seconds, but she believed she’d got the answer.

She took the lift and climbed four sets of stairs to the roof.

Adrenaline buzzed right through her, causing her hands to shake and her heart to pound against her ribcage. The metal was cold against her fingertips as she pawed the heavy door open slowly. It was unlocked.

The cold wind gushed in, blowing her hair out of her face as she stepped into the night. The city of London gleamed before her eyes. Where the sky meets the earth. This was where they could see stars high above and down below.

And there he was. Waiting for her with that smug crooked grin on his stupid face.

“Hi,” he said.

Oh, how she’d missed his stupid beautiful face.

She tucked her hands into the pockets of her jacket and ambled forward, still thinking him being here was too good to be true.

He lifted both hands like a surrendered criminal, both eyebrows raised as he said, “Before you get angry, I can explain.”

“Please do,” she demanded but found herself smiling.

With the wind in his hair, dimples on his cheeks and city light in his eyes, he looked absolutely breathtaking. She couldn’t hate him even if she tried.

Harry exhaled unsteadily through his mouth before mumbling, “Here I go,” and then he was on his knee in front of her.

She didn’t react when he took her cold hand and pressed it against his warm chest. She could feel his heart beating almost in sync with her own.

“Are you surprised?” he asked, chuckling nervously.

She exhaled a quiet laugh and said, “Yes, but also no.”

He cocked an eyebrow. “Because I warned you this would happen?”

“Because you warned me this would happen.” Her mouth curved at the corner as she recalled the Oscar night in his LA house, both of them drunk, him on his knee like this, a promise, and how in love she’d felt, almost as much as she did in this very moment.

“Is this too early or too late?” he ventured.

“This is perfect.”

She pressed her lips into a smile, and his green eyes flickered in the semi-darkness. “Well then.” He straightened his back. “Y/N ‘Bambi’ Y/L/N.”

“Yes.” Her voice was so brittle she feared he wouldn’t hear it, her stomach twisted into triple knots, her chest fluttering and her fingers trembling.

He held her gaze as the corner of his mouth arched. “Will you…”

“I swear to God if you’re jok–”

“Marry me,” he blurted, panting as though saying those words had drained all the energy out of him. “Marry me. I want to annoy you for the rest of my life. I want every fight, every laugh, every up and down, every kiss, every touch, everything about you. I will love you until all my teeth fall out, until you finally learn to cook–”

“I’ll never learn to cook.”

“I know,” he chuckled. “Most importantly, I’ll even let you love young Leo a bit more than me, but only sometimes.”

She covered her mouth. What meant to be a laugh came out as a sob.

“I would have written a speech, but I figured you’d roast me for my bad writing, so I’d rather improvise and blame this awful proposal on it being improvised.”

“God, you’re fucking annoying,” she laughed tearily into her hand and he was laughing, too.

Quickly, he got to his feet and tugged her into him. She circled her arms around his waist, her face buried into his chest as she inhaled the scent she’d missed achingly in the last two weeks.

“My girl is such a crybaby,” he said, kissing the top of her head, her temple, her ear, her cheek, her forehead. He kissed and held her until she’d calmed down.

“Yes,” she told him at last, lifting her eyes up to his.

“Yes, you’re a crybaby?”

“Yes, you’re a dumbarse and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life roasting you and yes, I’ll sometimes love young Leo more than you but only sometimes, because you’re the greatest love of my life and I cannot imagine a life without you–”

He stopped her with his lips, his hands tenderly cupping her face as his thumbs moved slowly over her chin, cheeks and jawlines. She’d imagined that their first kiss after two weeks apart would be sexually aggressive and against-the-wall hot, but this kiss was slow and sensual and passionate and full of wanting. It felt like his promise for their future together. One that would last.

#harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles series #my girl series

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thewidowsghost · 4 years

Text

Fox - Chapter 20

Previously on Fox:

"What am I supposed to say?" Natasha asks. "That sucked and your powers suck and you suck? Nope, because none of that is true," Nat adds and (Y/n)'s eyes widen slightly. Realizing that the rain was ruining the mood, (Y/n) snaps her fingers again and the rain stops, the clouds dissipating.

(Y/n) summons another chair and sits down beside Natasha. "Hey, so, we're supposed to leave tomorrow night," (Y/n) begins. "What do you say we go on that date on Saturday?" Natasha looks up from her lap and smiles.

"That sound's nice," Natasha says, a soft smile spreading across her face.

The two sit there for a while before (Y/n)'s phone rings. She pulls it out to answer, "Hello?"

(Y/n)'s POV

"Captain," Fury's voice comes from out of the phone. "Are you still with Romanoff?"

"Yes sir," I put the phone on speaker so Nat could listen too.

"Good, we need you and Romanoff to come in, ASAP," Fury orders.

"Yes sir," Natasha responds.

"Where do you need us? Back at base?" I ask, the two of us standing up, and I wave the chairs away.

"Yes Captain, you have four hours," Fury says, ending the call.

"Guess we're not going on that date anytime soon," Natasha says as the two of us sprint towards the house and up the front porch stairs. I grab my sketchbook, tear a piece of paper out.

"Go pack our stuff," I order, and Nat nods, darting inside.

I scribble something to the Bartons'. It says:

Dear Clint & Laura,

Fury called us in for a mission. Hopefully, we'll be back soon. We love you, see you soon. Tell the kids we said bye. Love, (Y/n) and Nat

I take the note and set it on the dining room table before darting upstairs to help Nat.

"Leave the guitar," I tell Natasha as she goes to grab it.

"Are you sure?" she asks and I nod.

"Just grab the bare minimum," I say, throwing my sketchbook and pencils haphazardly into my suitcase and zipping it up.

"Let's go," Natasha says and I nod, grabbing each of our suitcases.

The two of us jog down the stairs and sprint out to the field where we had landed the Quinjet a few days previously.

We get in and throw our suitcases into the storage area before heading for the pilot and co-pilot's seats. We sit down and I pull the Quinjet into the air.

3rd Person POV

"We're never going to get there in time at this rate," (Y/n) mutters, staring at the time till destination: 5 hours. "Only one way," (Y/n) says and Natasha looks at her.

"What?" Nat asks.

"You'll have to see," (Y/n) answers, closing her eyes. She summons a jet of wind and the Quinjet speeds up. She opens her eyes to see that the time has gone down by half an hour. "Jeez," (Y/n) mutters. She grabs the stick and begins to pull the Quinjet up to an elevation of about 20,000 feet. Once at the elevation, she pulls the stick gently back down so the Quinjet is flying level. (Y/n) relaxes when she sees that the time has gone down to three and a half hours. "That's a lot better," she murmurs.

"Nice job," Natasha says and (Y/n) smiles.

"Hey, since we can't do that date Saturday, how 'bout we do it now?" (Y/n) offers.

"Sounds interesting, I'm in," Natasha says and (Y/n) stands up from her seat.

"Sounds good, I'll be right back," (Y/n) darts back to where she keeps the coffee maker and opens a cabinet. From the cabinet, she pulls out a few bags of chips. "This is all we've got now, but here," (Y/n) says, setting the chips on the middle console before running over and grabbing some sour cream and onion dip.

"It works," Nat says, opening a bag of plain Ruffles.

"So, Miss Romanoff," (Y/n) says, opening the dip, setting it on the middle console then sitting back down. "Tell me a little about yourself."

Natasha takes some of the dip and eats a chip before starting. "I was born on November 22nd, 1984 in Russia. I wasn't a great human being until a few weeks ago," Natasha continues and (Y/n) frowns slightly. "What about you?" she asks.

"My birthday is October 5th, 1985. I was born in Malibu," (Y/n) begins. "My mother died when I was 17 then I went to live with my dad until I was old enough to join the Air Force. During my time in the Air Force, I went on a couple missions for the US government. While I was in Sokovia, one of my partners died, I still keep in touch with the the other though. After that, Clint and Fury recruited me to work for SHIELD," (Y/n) pauses and Natasha nods encouragingly for her to continue. "Clint brought me to the farm to meet Laura and the kids, then about a week later I left and Clint flew me home. That evening Fury called me for an urgent mission," (Y/n) smiles at Nat, "you, of course," Natasha rolls her eyes playfully. "Clint and I spend a couple of weeks trying to find you, and well, you know the rest." (Y/n) meets Natasha's emerald gaze, "And you're not a bad person. From what I can tell, you're smart and brave and it seems like you are willing to do the right thing at whatever the cost." At (Y/n)'s words, Natasha looks down.

"How can you be so sure?" Natasha asks softly.

"Well, it's the fact that you decided so quickly to leave for a fresh start. The fact that you and Clint came to help me with those evil dudes that attacked me back in Belarus. The fact that you're here, on this jet right now, ready to go on a mission to help change what happened in the past," (Y/n) finishes and Natasha looks up, seeing the serious look in (Y/n)'s (E/C) eyes. "And like I said, I don't judge people on their past mistakes, but what they do in the present. Whatever you did in the past doesn't matter to me, it's what you do now that counts."

"Thanks, (Y/n)," Natasha says. "That means a lot. Since I was little, I was told that I had no place in the world," sensing that (Y/n) was about to speak, Natasha holds up her hand to keep her from interrupting. "But since I met you, I realized that you helped me find a place in the world, and I will always be thankful to you for that."

"You don't have to thank me for anything," (Y/n) says, and Natasha meets her gaze.

"Yes, I do. If not for you, I might still be in Russia -" (Y/n) cuts Natasha off by grabbing her hand.

"Don't, don't do that to yourself," (Y/n) says.

"But-" (Y/n) cuts her off again.

"Don't," Natasha meets (Y/n)'s gaze and relaxes a little.

"Okay," the redhead murmurs. "I won't," she vows.

"Good," (Y/n) says, still holding Natasha's hand.

"You can let go of my hand now," Natasha says, not really wanting (Y/n) to let go.

"I'm trying to figure out if I want to let go," (Y/n) says and Natasha smiles. "I'm leaning towards no," Natasha entwines her fingers with (Y/n)'s.

"Good," Natasha says and (Y/n) smiles.

The two sit there for a while, talking about random things until they hear someone from SHIELD radio into the jet. (Y/n) gently removes her hand from Natasha's and pulls on her headphones.

"Captain Stark? Agent Romanoff? Come in," A man says.

"This is Stark," (Y/n) answers. Go change into your uniform, she tells Natasha and the redhead nods.

"Good, we thought it was you two. You have clearance to land," the man says.

"Right," (Y/n) pulls back on the stick, the Quinjet hovering in the air for a moment. She gently makes it so the Quinjet will auto-park and she jumps up from her seat. She runs over to the storage area, opens her suitcase and pulling out her SHIELD uniform before quickly pulling it on. Natasha walks in from the bathroom in her jet black uniform as (Y/n) is tying up her combat boots.

"Let's go," Natasha says and (Y/n) nods. The two jog back to the front of the Quinjet and (Y/n) presses a button as the Quinjet lands on the ground. (Y/n) nods to Natasha and the two jog off the Quinjet, matching each others' steps.

"Stark, Romanoff," the two stop in front of Agent Coulson.

"Agent Coulson," (Y/n) and Natasha say in unison.

"Follow me," Coulson says and (Y/n) and Natasha exchange a look before following the brown haired man into the SHIELD facility. "Enjoy your break?" Coulson asks as he leads the two women to the briefing room.

"Yes actually," (Y/n) answers for her and Natasha.

"Good, because you might be gone for a while," Coulson says and (Y/n) and Natasha exchange a look before walking into the briefing room.

"Stark, Romanoff," Maria Hill says.

"Agent Hill," Natasha answers, and Hill signals for the two to sit down.

They settle down in chairs across from each other.

"We need you two to escort a nuclear engineer out of Iran. It will need to be an undercover mission. Leave the Quinjet about a hundred miles from the facility, and drive the engineer back to the Quinjet," (Y/n) nods. "You need to get there as soon as possible, but tonight if you can," Hill says. "Try to have him here by Sunday."

"Yes, ma'am," Natasha and (Y/n) say in unison, standing up.

"Good luck," Hill says, nodding to dismiss the two women.

With a nod from (Y/n), her and Natasha run back outside to their Quinjet and pull it into the air.

Word Count: 1630 words

This chapter is a little shorter then the past few chapters, but if y'all have seen Captain America: The Winter Soldier, you should know what happens. BTW the next chapter will have violence in it, but not extreme, rivers of blood kind of things.

Anyway, Nat and (Y/n) are still so cute!!!! I love it!!!

See y'all!

Love,

Kaitlynn 😍❤

Imma tag peoples now: @confusinggemini612, @gay-disaster826, @thelastavenger-3000, @osugahunnyicedtea, @night-howl199, @minicastle, @happilyeverafterfantasybooks, @billiebanner, @me-and-sweatpants, @scottjudah, @scarlet-raccoon, @whore-for-charlynch, @nyx-aria, @night-howl199, @brittanyrenne2004, @juegamiri29, @minicastle, @peggycarter-steverogers, @gay-disaster826, @guitargodme, @avengers-avenging

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maknaesdancersrappers · 5 years

Text

Devoted 2

part 8

Overall warning/s: kinkier smut (eg. voyeurism, exhibition, etc.) character death, dark themes

Just how devoted is Jaehyun to you?

prev: Part 7

wc: 4.7k (i know it’s short, but an update is an update 🥺)

“Excuse me, but what is your right to hold my future godchild before me?” Doyoung scoffs, pointedly glaring at Kun, who began to laugh at him. “[Y/N]! How could you?!”

You shake your head and shrugged your shoulders, chuckling to yourself, “I didn’t ask Kun, Jaehyun did. Pick a fight with him, not me. Besides, Kun’s a doctor, not a banker.”

Kun nods, “I’m the obstetrician. Sorry, Doyoung.”

He huffed angrily cutting into the steak he ordered.

The three of you finally found a similar time slot to catch up with each other; spending an early dinner together at a restaurant Doyoung swears by. You were halfway through the main course when Kun teased Doyoung about being able to see and hold your kids before him which inevitably annoyed the latter. You had invited Jaehyun to join, but he told you he didn’t want to intrude as this was a mini reunion between high school friends.

“Oh,” You spoke up, halting their bickering, “I hope you two will be free in a month or so, we’re planning a housewarming party as soon as we move into the new house.”

“As long as it’s on a Sunday.” Doyoung says in between bites, covering his mouth with a fist.

You move your attention to Kun, who offers you an unsure smile.

“Hopefully, I’ll be free. But it’s a little busy in the hospital. I barely go home, to be honest. But don’t worry, I’ll do my best to go.”

“I understand if you really can’t.” You insisted, “But I hope you can.”

Doyoung hums, taking a swig of wine. “So in the end, only [Y/N] is getting married among the three of us.”

Kun takes offense to this, “Why are you implying that I don’t have plans at all? I’m just too busy as of the moment. I’m sure I’ll meet someone in the future. Are you still asexual?”

He narrowed his eyes at him, “Don’t make it sound like it’s a phase, Qian. I can’t help that I don’t feel sexual attraction to anyone.”

“But you had sex with that one girl.”

You gasped, almost spilling your iced tea. You leaned over, hissing at your best friend, “You had what?!”

Doyoung glares at Kun before sighing, “It was a one night stand. She’s a friend of a colleague I met at a birthday party. I’m not specifically attracted to her, but I’m not going to deny my body sexual gratification.”

“Okay, but why did you tell Kun before me?” You were very appalled by this new knowledge, but it bothered you more that he didn’t tell you first.

“I didn’t plan to! We ran into her when we met a bar and this guy,” He gestures to Kun with visible annoyance, “just ‘knew’ we had a past.”

“Seemed like she wanted a round two.” Kun teases and you narrow your eyes at Doyoung.

“Did you go for round two.”

The man in question raises his brows and looks away, choosing to take a lengthy sip of his drink.

“Oh, he did.” You and Kun said in unison, giving each other a knowing look.

“It’s purely physical.” Doyoung defends, practically slamming his wine glass on the table, “Besides, she doesn’t have time for a relationship. She’s a divorce attorney.”

You reached out and put a hand over his wrist, “We’re just teasing, Dons. Do whatever you want. You’re an adult; just, you know, be careful.”

“I am, don’t worry. The last thing I need is to get someone I don’t even love pregnant.” He dismisses the topic, “Speaking of, have the two of you decided on names? More importantly, will you name one after me?”

Retracting your hand away from him, you laugh at his question, “Sorry, Dons, but I don’t think we plan on naming one after you.”

He fakes a hurt expression, “Well, I hope you don’t name them something ridiculous.”

“He wants a daughter named after me, that’s for sure.” You swirl the contents of your glass around, “I was thinking of the same if we had a son, maybe Woojae or something, but I don’t want to dwell on it yet. I have other things to think about.”

The night crawls on; Doyoung pays for the meal and the three of you continue to lounge at the restaurant to finish your respective desserts. It feels nostalgic to be with them; you didn’t think it would ever happen since Kun left for China all of a sudden with no proper goodbye or explanation why. It’s surreal to see both of them matured into men when — what felt like yesterday — they were just scrawny teenage boys. Doyoung had gotten rid of his lisp and got lasik surgery. Kun was more eloquent now with words and confident with himself. You didn’t think you were going to miss being with them until tonight.

“Crap,” Doyoung grumbles after receiving a message, “I have to go. There’s been a hack in our system.”

“Oh, no. Will everything be alright?” You watched him grab his jacket he had draped on the back of the chair and shrug it on.

He nods, although unsurely, “We have amazing computer technicians in the company; I’m sure they’ve handled it well. I just need to make sure everything is okay at the office. I’m sorry about this.”

“Take care, Doyoung, and don’t apologize. It’s not your fault, hopefully everything’s okay.” Kun glances at you, “I should be heading back as well. I have an early morning.”

“Will Mr. Kyung pick you up?” Doyoung asks while pushing his chair back.

You stood up and slung your purse over your shoulder, “No, I was going to call for a cab.”

“Let me drive you home.” Kun offers and Doyoung insists you do so you agreed.

You and Kun see him off before heading over to Kun’s car and you input your address into his GPS; it was only a 10 minute drive even with the traffic. The journey started quietly, almost a little awkward.

“[Y/N].” He clears his throat and you glanced at him, “You know, I’m really glad that you’re happy; that you found someone to care for you.”

“Thanks, Kun…” Something felt a little off with his tone.

“I… had no control of what happened to us back in high school. I was scared when I left; we ended things on a bad note and—”

“Kun, it’s fine. The past is past; why are you telling me this? If you didn’t have control over it, then you don’t have to apologize for anything.” You had to admit there was a little venom in the way you spoke, but Kun didn’t seem to flinch at your tone.

“The past is past…” He repeated, “You’re just going to let things go because it was in the past?”

You frowned at him, not understanding what he wanted to say.

“[Y/N], there’s something you need to know; about why my family suddenly flew back to China.”

“Why? Why do I have to know? You make it sound like it’s my fault.” You honestly didn’t want to talk about this. “And you make it sound like it was a bad thing! You said there were better opportunities for your parents back in China.”

He groans, clearly frustrated, “Yes, they did. Their salary back there couldn’t compare to what they made here.”

“Why can’t we leave it at that? It was all perfect timing back then.”

“It wasn’t perfect timing, [Y/N].” His jaw is clenched, hissing the words out through gritted teeth. “There’s more to it than you think.”

You scoffed, “Okay, fine, so what? It doesn’t change the fact that your parents hated me.”

“My parents—” He swallows, trying to get his bearings, and speaks in a softer tone, “My parents never hated you, [Y/N]. They loved you; especially my dad. He was fond of you because you reminded him of my grandfather.”

“Then why the sudden hostility? Why did they try and stop us from seeing each other? The sudden curfew, the phone bans?”

“My grades dropped a letter and they just wanted me to focus in school! You know I was on scholarship so they were strict about my grades. It was never about separating us!”

“Then that night!” You cried, voice echoing in the small vehicle, “Your mother looked me in the eyes and said these exact words; ‘I don’t want you to date my son.’ Explain that!”

Kun takes a deep breath and exhales slowly. The glaring red brake lights of the cars in front seemed to make the mood worse as he looks at you pensively. “They didn’t want to do that, [Y/N].”

“Kun, please.” You rolled your eyes, “Your parents made it very clear—”

“Will you just listen to me for a sec? Qīn—”

“Shut up!” You screeched, panicking at the nickname you haven’t heard in years. “You don’t have the right to call me that.”

He shakes his head, distraught at the car honking behind him, and he starts to drive again, “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to call you that. It just came out—”

“Pull over.” You heaved; it felt like you can’t breathe, the air was too heavy, and the interior made you feel claustrophobic. “Pull over!” You don’t even recognize your voice as you screamed again.

Kun pulls over at the next opening and you unbuckle your belt, “[Y/N], I’m sorry. I swear, I didn’t mean to upset you… [Y/N], I’m just trying to protect you.”

A curt laugh bubbles from your chest, “From what? If this was about our relationship years ago, you could have protected me then! You’re years too late, Kun.”

Your words cut through him; hurt evident in his eyes as he hopelessly stares back at you.

“And I hate depending on him but,” You sniffed, “I have Jaehyun now. He can protect me and you don’t even know how safe I am with him. So if I’m in danger, I know Jaehyun will do anything in his power to protect me.”

His face doesn’t give anymore emotions as he unlocks the door and you start to leave until he speaks up again, “From who.”

You look back at him, confused.

Kun doesn’t meet your gaze, just staring forward, “I’m not protecting you from something. I’m protecting you from someone. Or at least I tried to.”

“Thanks, but…” You paused, seeing the slightest movement from his brows, “Jaehyun can handle it.”

He doesn’t say anything else and you get out of his car, waiting for him to pull back into the traffic and watch him drive away. You looked around, you were just a block away from your apartment so you began to walk towards it.

You’re willing yourself not to dwell on what happened in the car ride, but you couldn’t help repeating Kun’s voice when he accidentally called you by the pet name he used for you. You don’t know why you reacted that way when you heard it again. It gave you an overwhelming sense of nostalgia, but the way he said it bothered you; he sounded desperate.

You arrive home and the second you step inside, you lock the door and cautiously peered through the peephole. There was no one there and you didn’t feel like anyone was following you, so why did you even check?

Tea, you think. Tea will help you calm your nerves. As you scurry off into the kitchen after removing your shoes, tossing your purse onto the counter, you stare at the kettle.

Qin

Tea won’t make you forget.

Jaehyun came home at 9PM, tugging off the knot of his tie loose and debating on calling out for you; unsure if you’re busy or asleep. He was about to make a bee-line towards the bedroom to check on you, but skids to a stop when he notices your body slumped over the coffee table. His blood ran cold, dropping his things onto the ground and running towards you.

The thud of his items jolts you awake, whipping your head to the source of the sound and gasping in fear when your blurry vision sees a dark mass coming at you with arms raised forward. You try to move away, but your drunken limbs wouldn’t cooperate. You hear your name in a panic tone and you visibly relax when you recognize Jaehyun’s voice; your vision finally focusing on his worried expression as he knelt in front of you.

It was only then did Jaehyun realize the empty vodka bottle by the table and the shot glass laying on its side by your legs. He looks back at you, “What’s wrong?”

You threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and using his scent to calm yourself down. You felt like crying, but tears won’t come out.

“Hey,” He ran his hand over your back repeatedly and kissed the side of your head, “Hey, it’s okay. I’m here. It’s alright.”

That was all you needed to hear; the anxiety left your mind and the jitters stopped. Whatever Kun was talking about, you didn’t have to worry about it as long as you were with Jaehyun.

He feels your body relax and he pulls away a bit to see you passed out. He sighs, pulling you back close to him and kissing your forehead, rocking your bodies to a silent rhythm. He doesn’t know what’s wrong, but he’s not going to wait for you to wake up and tell him about it. Once Jaehyun carried you to the bed and gingerly stripped your clothes off, he took off your makeup and tossed the wipes into the trash bin. He pulls the sheets up to your chin and gives you one last kiss on the cheek before retrieving his phone from where he dropped it earlier.

He presses a number on the speed dial and walks to the window, peering down at the night life of the city.

“Sir.”

“What happened before she got home?”

“Everything seems good so far. Kyungwon mentioned how the pull-out kotatsu is working well?” You look around the empty space of Yuta’s apartment, already visualizing how to design and decorate it.

Yuta casually nods, “Yes, I’m quite impressed by her design, really. It’s quite convenient for the heater to turn on automatically after a certain length.”

“The tatami mats will be delivered tomorrow morning and installation will be done by the end of the week. Regarding the bathtub—”

“The ofuro.” He interjects and you repeat after him.

“The ofuro, yes, there’s a delay in shipping it. The company said it might take another week.”

Yuta shrugs, “If it can’t be helped. I don’t mind the wait.”

You look over the apartment once more, “Well, aside from that, after everything that needs to be installed is in place, we can begin putting furniture and decorating it the way you like it.”

The sun is setting outside and Yuta’s apartment has an amazing view of it; you check your watch for the time and hope you won’t get caught in the rush hour.

“Great!” He cheers, “Finally, a place I can call home. Although, I’ll miss room service.”

This makes you laugh, “Can’t cook?”

“I can if I have to, but I don’t have the time or luxury to do so with all the work I have. I’ve already hired the hotel chef to come by every other day to make something for me, you know, something I can easily reheat or throw all together.” He pauses, “Does Jaehyun cook? Or do you?”

“We both do. We take turns. But we have days when we live off on take-outs and deliveries.”

Yuta’s phone rings and he fishes it out of his pocket, lightheartedly scoffing before glancing at you. “Speak of the devil. Hello— hey, calm down man.”

You watch his expression grow concerned and confused as he looks at you.

“She’s here and she’s fine. I don’t know. I haven’t seen her take out her phone the whole time.”

Your phone? You spin around and dashed to your handbag on the counter, dissecting it for the said item but found it to be missing. You wonder out loud about its whereabouts, wracking your brain to remember where you last used it.

“[Y/N].” Yuta calls out to you and you turn to see him hand his phone out to you.

You take it from him, putting it over your ear, “Jaehyun?”

“Are you okay? Where’s your phone?”

“I— I don’t know. I must have misplaced it.” You licked your lips. He sounds so frantic. “I probably left it at the house by accident. I dropped by earlier since they started with remodeling and I remember using it last there.”

“Okay… okay. I’ll go look for it. Can you give the phone back to Yuta?”

“Jaehyun, what’s happening?”

“I’ll tell you later. I need you to go home right now.”

You hand the phone back to Yuta and with the look on your face, he puts the call on loudspeaker.

“Jaehyun?” He clears his throat.

“Yuta, I need you to take [Y/N] home. Please.”

“Yeah, of course. I’ll take her now…” You move back to where your bag is, zipping it back up to get ready to leave. “Is everything okay? I know it’s not exactly my business, but I’d like to know why I have to escort her home.”

The line was silent for a moment; eerie enough for you to peek over your shoulder just before Jaehyun finally replies.

“There was a threat made against her, Yuta. I don’t want to take chances.”

Your blood ran cold. Was this from the person Kun warned you about? But that can’t be, right? This person should have been from years ago. Did they find you again because of your engagement with Jaehyun?

You felt a hand on your shoulder and you gasped, backing away so quickly, you hit your hip on the edge of the counter. You winced in pain, but brought back to your senses and looked up at Yuta with wide eyes.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have touched you. You’re obviously distraught.” He says, taking a step back.

“No, no, it’s fine. I’m okay. Let’s just go.”

The walk from the apartment, to the elevator, and to Yuta’s car was tense. For you, at least. Yuta kept it cool; walking casually. On the other hand, you followed closely behind him, trying to inconspicuously check your surroundings for shady characters. When you got to his car, he opened the door for you and you quickly got in.

“Relax, [Y/N]. It can very well be just a prank.”

You give it a thought. He has a point. But the fact Kun told you he wanted to protect you from someone a couple of days ago rang at the back of your mind. Maybe you should have told Jaehyun what happened; why you suddenly decided to get drunk in the middle of the week. He didn’t press you for a reason, probably chalking up to it as stress from work.

“Unless,” Yuta interrupts your train of thought, “Jaehyun has enemies? Or you have some stalker?”

“—I don’t!” You vehemently denied, choking on your own spit. You cover it up with a nervous chuckle, “I mean, who would take interest in me?”

“Jaehyun took interest in you.” Yuta hums, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel. “But in our business, we’re bound to make enemies without even knowing it.”

“You think Jaehyun pissed someone off?”

He doesn’t answer immediately, focusing on driving for a few minutes and checking the rear view mirror. “There’s a lot of greedy men out there, [Y/N]. Plenty of them are petty, too.”

It was completely dark out by the time you reached your apartment. When he escorted you all the way up to your room, you asked him to stay until Jaehyun returned. He seemed to hesitate, but relented once he noticed just how scared you were.

“Would you like anything to drink? Tea? Coffee?” Your eyes shift to the wine cooler, “Vodka?”

Yuta looks at you incredulously, “I don’t think this is the right time to drink alcohol, [Y/N]. If anything, I think I should be preparing you some tea.”

“No, no, I’ll make it myself. Please, make yourself comfortable.” You grabbed the kettle and filled it up with water. “What kind would you like?”

“Hmm? Anything is fine.”

His voice sounded like he wasn’t seated at the counter nor the living room. Once you turned the stove on, you walked out into the hallway to find him looking at the photos on the wall. It almost freaked you out, until you saw him smiling at the photos — almost innocently at them.

He realizes your presence and stutters out an apology. “Sorry, I just really admire your relationship. It makes me wish I had someone to protect and care for. You must feel pretty lucky to have someone like him… someone who’d go out of their way to protect you.”

“There’s no one more I’d trust my life with.” You chuckled, showing off your engagement ring. “I just wish he’d—”

You stopped yourself, hoping he didn’t catch it, but he curiously peeks at you over his shoulder and you inwardly curse yourself as you try to rephrase what you were about to say.

“He’s just…” There’s no way to sugarcoat what you wanted to say. “He’s overprotective. And I appreciate it, I really do. It’s just… he doesn’t have to go out of his way to do so.”

Yuta laughs, “He’s a billionaire, [Y/N], what exactly does ‘out of his way’ mean?”

“I mean, he doesn’t have to overdo it.” You sighed, realizing a split second later that he could interpret your words wrongly. You open your mouth to correct yourself, but he beats you to it.

“Overdo it?” He repeats, “Like…”

The kettle begins to whistle and you quickly excuse yourself to prepare the tea. When you turn the stove off, you hear the front door open and Jaehyun’s voice calling out to both you and Yuta. You hear Yuta greet him and tell him that you’re preparing tea just as you round the corner and almost collide face first into Jaehyun’s chest.

“[Y/N]!” He grabs your shoulders and hugs you.

“Jaehyun, what’s happening?” You pushed him away, feeling a little shy since Yuta was there.

He lets out a heavy breath, “I received a note while I was at the office. It questioned your safety.”

“What does that mean? What did the note say exactly?”

“Is she safe?” Jaehyun clears his throat, “And it had a picture of you, Doyoung, and Kun from that night you three met up for dinner.”

Your fingers began to shake uncontrollably, Kun’s warning flooding back into your mind. “...From who?”

The look of regret on your fiance’s face tells you he hasn’t found out yet who sent the photo, “I don’t know. The note was slipped into the receptionist desk somehow.”

“Mina doesn’t remember where it came from or who handed it to her?’

“Mina hasn’t come into work for two days now. The temporary secretary there is overwhelmed with the work that piled up for her, so I can’t blame her if she doesn’t remember who or where the note came from.”

“Security cameras?” Yuta pipes up, but Jaehyun shakes his head. “I was told my people have already installed it.”

“The cameras were set up, but there was a system error on our end. There’s no footage.”

You walk off towards the windows and cross your arms, overwhelmed with the urge to vomit. Jaehyun calls for you and you shrugged your shoulders, “Maybe it’s just a prank? That’s possible, right?”

“Yes, it is.” Jaehyun pauses, slowly nodding his head, “But I don’t want to take chances, [Y/N], not when it concerns you.”

“Would you have any idea who would be behind this, Jaehyun?”

He looks at Yuta and frowns, “Not a single clue.”

You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth; you should tell him about what Kun told you.

“Jaehyun, [Y/N], if you need anything, I’ll gladly help. I can have my team set up surveillance cameras here — free of charge. You can even have the feed be sent straight to your phones.”

“My phone.” You gasped, remembering it was missing. Before you could panic, Jaehyun fishes it out of his pocket and holds it out to you.

“It was at the house.”

Checking the notifications, there were nearly a hundred missed calls from both him and Doyoung. You peer up at him while calling Doyoung. “You told Doyoung?”

“Of course. I thought he would know something.”

“[Y/N]?! Where the fuck—”

“I’m fine! I’m safe! I just left my phone at the house this morning and didn’t notice! I’m sorry for making you worry.” You continue to calm your best friend down, promising to be careful and such. By the time you are done with the call, Yuta announces he should head back to his hotel.

“I should get going. Take care, you two.”

You walk back to them, “Oh, please stay for dinner. As a thanks for bringing me back home and even waiting for Jaehyun with me.”

He smiles, “Maybe some other day? I’m expecting a conference call with my family later and I wouldn’t want you guys to hear a bunch of angry Japanese.”

“Oh,” You purse your lips, “Okay. Some other day then?

“Yuta, thank you again for bringing her home and waiting with her. It really put my mind at ease to know she’s not alone.” Jaehyun puts an arm around you and you lean into him.

“Don’t mention it, Jaehyun, so tell me if I could be of any help, I’ll gladly do so.”

You both see Yuta off, waiting for him to enter the elevator and waving one last time before closing the door and locking it for the night. You turn to Jaehyun, who immediately reacts to your touch.

“Don’t worry,” He whispers, “You’ll be okay, baby. I’ll take care of it.”

“I know. I know you will.” You tug at his arms and he leans down to kiss you, letting your lips mold against each other. When he pulls away, you lick your lips, “I’m going to make tea. Would you like some?”

“I’m good. I’ll finish up some work. Get some sleep after, okay? I’ll be with you as soon as I’m done.”

You watch him walk off towards his home office and you make your way back to the stove to reheat the kettle. Your eye catches the photo Yuta was looking at; it was your graduation photo with him, both of you dressed in the dark gown and proudly clutching onto your diplomas, but had noticeably harder grips on each other. Everything seemed simpler back then with nothing to worry about other than school, rent, and what to eat daily.

Why didn’t you tell him about what Kun told you?

No, why couldn’t you tell him?

You look back to where he disappeared into; now determined to solve this on your own.

Inside his home office, Jaehyun carefully closes the blinds of the little window on the door and pulls out the note he had received earlier.

He didn’t want to lie to you. Especially not about something like this. It still involved you, however the safety being compromised wasn’t just yours.

He opens the crumpled note back up, rereading the 3 words over and over again. His gaze moves to the photo it came with. It really was of you, Doyoung, and Kun.

It just wasn’t from a couple days ago; nor was it a couple of weeks either. Anyone could tell with one look how far back it was. You were standing in a music store, watching Doyoung pick an album from the stand in front of you, beside you stood Kun, just barely recognizable and the only telltale sign was the beauty mark on his brow. What stood out the most was that all three of you wore your high school uniforms.

Jaehyun crumples it up, angrily closing his fist around the photo. He brings the note back up and clicks his tongue.

Does she know?

a/n: an update since quarantine sucks. this chapter is a lot shorter only because i’m still not in right headspace to write, but i’ve been working on something devoted-related (not a fic or anything written) and it’s getting me back into writing again.

next: part 9

~ buy me a peach? but why?

#nct smut #nct scenarios #jaehyun smut #jaehyun scenarios

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hellsfanatic · 4 years

Text

** this is Soda turning 18 :)

It couldn’t have been past six when I was woken up by the front door slamming shut. A sigh came from the kitchen belonging to Darry. I hopped out of bed, not worrying about changing just yet. “Roll your eyes a little louder big bro, I almost couldn’t hear it from my bedroom,” I joked with Darry as I walked in the kitchen.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry lil bro,” he half-apologized with a smile. “Whatcha doin’ up so early anyways, huh Sodapop?” Darry asked. Usually on my birthday I sleep in. I sleep in pretty late. I glanced at the time. Five forty-eight. It was still dark out.

I let out a yawn. “Heard the door. Who came in anyways?” Before Darry got the chance to answer, Steve was behind him. He had two fingers up behind Darry’s head. Bunny ears, classic. I cracked a grin, I had to. “Hiya Stevie.”

“Hey Sodapop,” Steve said with a smile, moving away from Darry. “So I heard it’s someone’s birthday, you hear anything about that Soda?” He came over to me. “Hmm, if only I knew who’s birthday it was,” he commented, a joking tone clear in his voice.

Deciding to play into it, I said, “Hm, is it your birthday Steve? Nah, it can’t be.” I thought out loud for a bit, listing off everyone’s birthday. I finally got to mine. “Gee Steve, it’s my birthday ain’t it!” Steve faked a gasp.

“Well happy birthday man! I had no clue!” He widened his eyes. It fell quiet for a few seconds while we tried to hold back our smiles. I burst out laughing, shortly followed by Steve. “Really though, happy birthday Soda,” Steve said after we calmed.

Darry just gave us both a smile, “Yep, turnin’ to the big eighteen this year aren’t ya?” he asked playfully, messing up my hair as he did. I hadn’t really thought about the fact I was technically an adult as of today. What would even change? I didn’t have much of a plan for my future and I didn’t have Sandy to start a family with anymore. Honestly, I don’t think I’m ready for it, but I know I’ve still got time here to figure it all out. Even if I don’t make a plan, going with the flow can’t be terrible.

I tried to see a reflection of myself in the window, which didn’t work out too great, but it was good enough. “Eighteen and rockin’ a new hairstyle aren’t I?” I laughed, looking at what Darry had done to my already messy hair. The other two laughed along with me, which I honestly wasn’t expecting. I wasn’t really trying to get them to laugh, but if it works it works. I had started to fix it up when Steve grabbed my forearm.

“Whatcha doin’? I think you should keep it. Represents you, ya dig? Y’know, real wild,” he said with a grin.

I chuckled. “Wild huh? I don’t think I look wild right now buddy. I just look, I don’t know, dirty? Nah, that ain’t it, just messy.” I kept fixing it, but every single time it would pop up in a different spot. I knew I could just fix it later while I was getting ready though, so it’s okay. “Kay, well I’m gonna go get ready okay? I’ll be back in a little.”

I didn’t take long, but now I was showered, dressed, and had my hair greased back so nothing was sticking out. I did get a little held up by Pony getting ready, but it wasn’t too bad. I didn’t really have to get ready, it was my day off from work, but I figured I shouldn’t go around the house with bed head all day. It was a Sunday too, so that meant all of us were out of work and school for the day.

The day went by pretty fast at first, and by now it was a little after noon. Almost everyone had shown up and stuck around, but we still didn’t know where Dally was. We knew he was going to stop by, but he never actually said when he would. Johnny said he saw Dallas earlier, so yeah, he was around. All we had to do was wait.

About half an hour later, the door opened and closed and Dally walked in. “Hey Dal! Where ya been man?” I asked, putting on a bright smile. He just shrugged. Whatever, he didn’t have to say it. He came in the house, sitting down next to Johnny. Johnny gave me an apologetic look, probably because of Dally. All I did was smile.

The rest of the day went on smoothly, I got some more happy birthday wishes but other than that we were all just hanging around and having a good time. Honestly it’s the best I could’ve asked for this year. We had all just finished dinner, and decided it was time for gifts. I was expecting what I got every year, some clothes or something else I could use everyday.

Most of what I got was the normal. Until we got to the last gift. Darry handed it to me, so I assumed it was from him, but it was tagged as ‘From: Mom & Dad For: Sodapop’. I froze. It was even in mom’s handwriting. My eyes slowly moved up to look at Darry. How long had he had this?

“Go on Soda, open it. It’s your eighteenth birthday present, they did it for me too,” Darry spoke softly, giving me a small smile. I nodded, opening the box. There was a small pile of photos, all clipped together in one corner. There was seventeen in it, and I looked through every one of them. I didn’t recognize the first four, but after that everything made sense.

Each picture was me. They were in all sorts of different places but mainly in the house. They were all me on my birthday, one picture per year. All the way from when I was born to when I was finally an adult. Except for this year. I know my mom and dad didn’t take all of these, I think Darry was the one that took the other pictures, but I can’t remember for sure.

“C’mon Soda, we gotta get year eighteen otherwise it just won’t make as much sense,” Darry said, motioning me over to him so he could snap a picture. I went with him, letting him take it. He did and went to get it connected to the others. I watched, and when he was done, I pulled him into a hug. I knew he was keeping this up for our parents and for me. I knew he didn’t have to do it, but he did.

It took him a second, but he hugged back. “Thanks Darry,” I mumbled to him. He nodded. We stayed there like that for a while, until Darry let go and stepped back. I took the pictures, looking them over again, and brought them to my room. Gosh, it was almost like I could cry. It was just real sweet of him. I’ll have to find out something even better for him in January.

#the outsiders #darrel curtis #ponyboy curtis #dallas winston #johnny cade #the outsiders darry #the outsiders sodapop #sodapop curtis #steve randle #the outsiders steve #my writing

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loudsuitlover · 4 years

Text

Doctor Harry XVI. La vereda de la puerta de atrás

A/N: Finally we know what happened to Harry! I’m excited for you guys to read this, let me know what you think :)

INDIE’S POV

I can barely make it to my room. It surprises me how many tears we can make without drying ourselves. I started crying the second I got away from Harry’s house and I cried all the way to my house in the taxi and still I’m not done.

I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t know why in the world I thought it would be okay if I just talked about that but the fact that Harry’s friend collaborated on the association and the way he said “it was their son, right?”

It wasn’t just their son. It was Dylan and Dylan was everything. Dylan made me play piano every day, Dylan would come over to my house just to see me for 5 minutes even if he lived 40 minutes away, Dylan showed me the best sunset I have yet seen. And Dylan was also a musician and he was a friend and, yes, he was a son, and a boyfriend and a grandson.

He was my first love and I swore he would be the last because there’s just no other way. He was half of me, it’s as simple as that. We were connected and we still are and we will always be because that’s just what it is when you find the one. I know most people don’t even find them, most people search their entire lives to find what I had with Dylan and still never find it so I should be thankful because it’s better to have loved and lost than to haven’t loved at all; but it’s just so hard…

I lie on my side on my bed and let the tears soak my pillow. I can’t push the memories away now. I opened the dam and now everything is coming out and choking me. I remember my Mum knocking on my bedroom door, the way she looked, I’ll always remember the way she looked. And my screams, tearing my throat up, and her small arms trying to hold me as I yelled and fought. I remember the sirens and then the hospital and Dylan’s mother’s face and how my hands trembled.

I don’t even know how in the midst of all the horror I’ve fallen asleep but the vibration of my phone against the mattress wakes me up. I bring it to my ear without checking the caller ID.

“Indie, thank God!” Harry’s loud voice pierces my ear.

“What is it?” My voice is hoarse after the sleep and the crying.

“What happened?” He asked. “The doorman told me you were crying. It’s the first time he tells me something like that.”

“Well it must have shocked him, I’m sure the rest of Med students that leave your apartment leave with a big smile and freshly fucked.” I regret my words as soon as I say them. “Sorry, that is none of my business.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Nothing.”

“What happened, Indie? Were you crying for something I said or didn’t say or-”

“No” I cut him off before he keeps messing up “it has nothing to do with you. It’s just… I cry every time I talk about him. I don’t like talking about what happened.”

Harry sighs.

“Yeah, I understand…” He doesn’t. “It’s the same for me…”

“What?”

“Listen, baby, I gotta go but… Uh… I’ll see you tomorrow night?”

Tomorrow night? He’s crazy.

“I can’t.” I lie.

“Tomorrow is Sunday, baby…”

“I have plans.”

He sighs.

“Indie, I-”

“It’s true.” I lie. “I’m not like you, I do have a life.”

“Wow.”

My eyes fill with tears again. I am a horrible person. I don’t even know why I said that to him but I can’t even speak now, my throat is completely closed. How could I throw that in his face after what he told me? I deserve all the bad things that could happen to me.

“Call me when you’re not mad anymore so we can talk.”

He hangs up. The distress hits me harder, it wraps around my chest and presses down and I feel like it’s going to collapse but I don’t even care if I stopped breathing.

Whenever I think of him, it’s like it’s happening all over again, like I never did all that progress, like I never went to therapy or like it’s the first time this is hitting me. But it’s not; and I know what I have to do. I can’t be alone or I would go down the same old dark road again and I don’t want that. I can’t endure that same old story.

Jason appears on my door not half an hour later. This reminds me so much of those months too but somehow instead of a trigger is comforting because he was there for me then and he’s here for me now and he’ll be here if I need him tomorrow and his hug always feels like the world can’t touch me if his arms are around me. I start crying again.

It's not as catastrophic as it was before but the quietness only makes it even harder. My heart is breaking all over again and now it’s doing it silently. Frustration is added to the pain because I don’t want to stay always stuck here. I want to move on and be able to talk about Dylan without wanting to die myself and instead here I am, on a cocoon on Jason’s arms as I silently cry on the couch.

I tilt my neck when I wake up for the third time today and find Jason with a deep frown and lips on a thin line. I look away from him and pout like a little girl. Of course he’s still mad at me. This doesn’t change what I said to him.

“How did he find out?” He asks instead. “Did you tell him?”

I nod and feel his hand on the low of my back as he shifts closer to me.

“A friend of his collaborates with Dylan’s organisation and… He asked about him.”

“Harry did?”

“No, his friend. Harry didn’t know anything until this morning…”

Jason hums. His hand keeps drawing figures on my back so I dare to look at him again.

“Are you still mad at me?” I whisper as if I was afraid he would hear me and then say yes.

His eyes bore into mine.

“Do you really want to talk about this now?”

“So yes.” I look ahead but from the corner of my eye I can still feel his eyes fixed on me. “You can leave if you want.”

“I also didn’t have to come if I didn’t want to.” He points out. “But I still came because I love you.” He sighs. “Listen, I wish you would keep your opinion about my relationship to yourself but I talked to Marie and I know where you’re coming from. I know you mean well, Indie, and that you’re just worried about me but I respect you and the only thing I ask is for you to do the same.”

Oh, God, I don’t want to cry again.

“You’re right, J. I’m a terrible person and I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you or disrespect you. I love you so much.” The tears win the battle as they roll down my cheeks. “You’re… You’re still one of the few people that actually put up with me and… I know I’m… Not making it easy for anyone but” I sob “I really do need you all. I feel so alone, J.”

His muscled arms wrap around me as he pulls me to him.

“You’re not alone, Indie.” His voice cracks. “You’ve got us, we’ll always be here for you, and you’ve got your family. You’ll never be alone, Indie-pixie. And about me putting up with you, I never want to hear you say that bullshit again, do you hear me? I’m fucking lucky to have you. Anyone who has you in their life is.” He presses a kiss on my hair line. “You take care of me and I know no matter what I can always count on you and I fucking love you, okay? We all do.”

“I love you too.”

“Good.” He puff a laugh. “Now let’s go eat something, I’m starving.”

I’m not but I go with him to my kitchen and watch him cook pasta for the two of us. If Dylan was here he’d force me to eat. He always did that but I always dismissed him. I’ve never had any eating problem, it’s just that Dylan thought I ate so little because he ate like some hungry lion all the time and for some reason he thought I should eat like him. He loved my mum’s cooking.

I remember back in Capitol in my house, which now is my dad’s house, we had this huge kitchen with huge glass windows that looked at my mum’s garden and I remember right before we started dating we would do our homework on the kitchen while she cooked and Dylan would be the taster of everything.

I imagine I would try to cook Spanish food for him now. He would like that I took up cooking, that’s for sure, and I’m sure he’d like everything I made too. But I’ll never know because he’s gone and he’ll never come back.

It was so hard to be in that kitchen or in that dining room or even in my room. I can barely sleep there. Everything at Capitol reminds me of him and that’s why it’s just so hard to visit my dad.

Jason sets a plate of pasta in front of me and I grab the fork even if I couldn’t eat if I tried.

“What did you guys do last night?” I try to divert my thoughts from Dylan to literally anywhere else.

“We had dinner at my place and then we went to Loft 39.”

“Did you have fun?”

“Yes, but it would have been better with you.”

I smile even though I doubt it.

“How’s Ollie?”

“Lost.” Jason shrugs. “She told me what she did to Mario and you’re right, it is nasty.”

“I talked to him last night, he was at Elvis Buchanan’s birthday and I think he’s falling for her…”

“Who the hell is Elvis Buchanan?” He frowns and I chuckle.

“He’s a guy.” I shrug. “He’s nice.”

His eyes look up from his plate to mine.

“How are things with Harry?”

I shrug. Well, the other night he cried on my bed and last night he told me to get my own blanket if I was cold but after that we spooned and he ate me out this morning. So I have no idea.

“What do you think?” I ask him instead “You know, about Harry and me?”

“What’s there to think?”

I shrug.

“I don’t know… I mean… Do you think he’s using me?”

“Do you?”

I shrug.

“Where is this coming from, Indie?”

“It’s just… This morning he talked to this friend and when he asked him who I was he said I was a Med student.”

Jason’s eyes narrow.

“And you are.”

“Yes, but… Is that what I am to him? A Med student?”

“Well, what is he to you?”

I’m struck dumb.

“A friend.” I tell him.

He nods.

“Well, I’m guessing he was just trying to establish you, I guess. I mean what else could he say? It’s how you met after all.”

I don’t want to keep talking about it, especially having Dylan’s smile on my mind so I look away from him and nibble some on my past at the risk of throwing up.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” He asks.

I guess that’s a way of taking my mind off. We play Failure to Launch but I fall asleep soon after Sarah Jessica Parker shows up. Grieving is really exhausting.

“Indie”

Warm hands lightly shake my arms and I blink.

“Dylan?”

“No, it’s Jason.”

I rub my eyes and see Jason looking at me with sorrowful eyes.

I feel my heart crashing on my chest. I haven’t seen a single photo of Dylan since his funeral. I can’t. But it’s heart-breaking to realize how hard it is for me to remember his face now. I know the colour of his eyes, and I can fantasize about his smile but if I close my eyes and try to see his entire face, I just… It’s not like a picture.

“Come on, let’s go to bed.”

Jason walks me to bed and lies down next to me before he wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me to him.

Had I been with Harry, he wouldn’t have woken me up to take me to bed. Instead, he would have picked me up like a kid and take me to bed himself. I don’t know why I just thought about that.

Jason’s fast asleep but I lie wide awake on the mattress. Of course I would do that, I’d fall asleep at any random moment and then stay up for the rest of the night. As much as I try to fall asleep it’s impossible and I wonder if this is how Harry feels when he can’t sleep too. No wonder he was harsh to me, this is terrible.

I haven’t gotten anything from him all day after our talk on the phone. Not that it surprises me after what I told him, but I still wonder how he’s doing. I wish I could talk to my therapist right now. Well, I don’t, because I know what she’s going to say and I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to fight her again, but I guess I want to know what I’m thinking and I know it sounds silly to say that but I need help figuring that out.

I remember when Dylan passed away I had this feeling in my chest and my belly and I thought I had asthma but it was none of that, it was just anguish and the thing was I couldn’t put my finger on it to the point where I just thought I was sick on my lungs and not on my mind. Even after therapy though, sometimes it’s hard for me to kind of know what I’m feeling.

I need to get out of bed. I’m driving myself crazy and, since Harry’s not around, the only other thing that manages to take my mind off, is downstairs so I try not to wake Jason up as I make my way to the reading room. When I slide the door opened, I entertain my eyes with the moonlight hitting the piano and without thinking, I sit on the stool and lift up the black lid so the keys are exposed to me.

I run my fingers through them, I haven’t played in three years. I’m not even sure I’m going to remember how to play but my fingers seem to remember Beethoven’s Moonlight sonata even before my mind does.

I’m not me anymore, I’m a part of a bigger thing, I’m a part of what’s playing and it surprises me to realize before I met Harry, I had resigned from feeling this way, from not thinking and just being but after I met Harry or since I know Harry, this is how he makes me feel. He makes me feel like music does.

It scares me because I know everything would be less painful if he was here now, if he was sitting down on one of the reading chairs listening to my sonata before he stood up and took me bare. But he is not and he won’t be here because it’s just sex between us.

I look ahead when I finish the piece and find a flabbergasted Jason staring at me with his lips parted. I look down, embarrassed.

“That was beautiful, Indie.”

“It wasn’t.” I complain. “It was sad.”

“It was sad and beautiful.”

I don’t understand how something can be sad and beautiful but I’ll let it go. I know Jason’s tired and I should try to get some sleep too.

“That was the first time I played since Dylan died.” I say. “Do you think I’m betraying him?”

Jason’s eyes hold mine for the longest minute. I don’t expect what he says.

“He’d like him.”

HARRY’S POV

It’s been a chill Monday. I’ve only had two surgeries and two hours of office so I’ve been able to work on my patients’ record a lot but it’s been hard to focus.

Family weekends always drain me, especially when it’s not my plan so I didn’t have time to prepare, not that I prepare very well anyway and to make things worse, Indie hasn’t contacted me yet.

I know I should give her time and space and all that shit but I’m tired of this back and forth with her. I don’t even know why but I have this need to make sure she’s okay and I just don’t want her to be in pain. It’s as simple as that. And knowing she’s gone through that… I guess it just explains a lot of things.

And I know I don’t deserve her, I don’t deserve any of this but… I’m starting to think maybe I don’t have to… Be alone all the time. She doesn’t want anything other than the physical relationship we have from me and that’s good, that’s safe; but it doesn’t mean I don’t worry about her. I never thought someone like her was going to show up and just change everything but for the first time since it happened, I actually want to tell somebody about it. I want to tell her. Yet I don’t know how… Because for all I know she might just storm out of the room- the girl has a temper- or tell me she’s not an ONG or something like that but… I just think if I can get her understanding I might forgive myself and I’m starting to think she might need me too.

Harry: Are you at uni?

I know she is because she was driving herself crazy when she had to miss lectures because she was sick so I don’t think she’d skip a lecture for any other reason. I think it’s cute that she’s such a psycho. She gives me a hard time over the amount of hours I work but I’m pretty sure I won’t see her face at all during finals.

Indie: Yes.

Harry: At the lectures hall?

Indie: Yes

Indie: What do you want?

Harry: I’m picking you up

Indie: What?

Indie: No!

Harry: Why not?

Indie: I’m going shopping with Marie.

Harry: Well, go some other day.

Indie: No, I’ll see you some other day.

Harry: Please, love.

Indie: I said no but don’t worry I’m sure you can find some other Med student to fuck.

I hate it when she says that. It’s none of her business like she keeps saying but she really does get on my nerves when she acts like that. The only reason I was seeing other people is because she said we were “just sex”.

Anyway, I’m picking her up. I’ll drive her and Marie to the shops if that’s what I need to do to be able to talk to her. She can’t just act as if she cared and then shut me out and push me away whenever she feels like it.

I am leaning against the bars where the students lock their bikes when I see her walking out of the lectures hall holding a folder against her chest. She frowns and pouts like a mad little girl when she spots me and I know it shouldn’t be funny to me but I just think it’s so cute that her face is so giving. She stops in front of me and doesn’t stop frowning but I’m grinning at her. She’s hilarious.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

“You gave me no other choice.” I shrug.

“Yes, you could have waited for tomorrow.” She whispers through clenched teeth.

“You would have given me another excuse.” We both know that.

“Why are you smiling? Do you think this is funny?”

“Sort of.” I admit. “I mean, I’m not fully sure why you’re mad.”

“Anyone could see you here.” She looks at both her flanks.

“Indie, I work here. It’s not strange for anyone to see me here.”

“Yes, but talking to me?”

Her words sting but I don’t let her see that.

“I told you I can’t meet you today.”

“Yes, because you were going shopping with Marie who is nowhere to be found.”

“We’re meeting at the shops.”

“Okay, well, I’ll drive you.”

“I don’t want you to.”

“I just want to talk.”

She studies my face. Her hair is tied up on a long braid that falls on her back but some thin locks have fallen out of it and dance over her face. I want to tuck them behind her ear but I don’t. I need to stop doing that sort of things. She sighes, she’s going to say yes.

“Okay.”

I smile and walk towards my car and she adjust her bag on her shoulder before she starts walking next to me. She is texting someone and my hands seem to have a mind of their own because they hold her waist as we walk down the kerb towards the parking lot, afraid that she might not see it and stumble. Her body tenses up, she’s just as surprised as I am.

The drive is silence because she’s still texting whoever it is she’s talking to and I take the time to arrange my thoughts. I’ve never actually told anyone about this. Those who know know because they’re a part of the story one way or another but I’ve never sat in front of a third person and told them about the accident.

When I pull over at the shops parking lot, Indie unfastens her seat belt but waits for me to say something. She’s nervous and she’s probably uncomfortable too but I don’t want to do this here.

“Should we have a cup of coffee?” I offer.

She weighs her options. I don’t think she knows I’d do whatever she asks me to but she nods. I wait for her in order to walk side by side to the nearest café we can find and I dare to place a hand on her lower back as I gently guide her to one of the tables. She’s scolded me before about me not touching her in public and even though she just fought me for showing up at the lectures hall, I think she doesn’t mind the contact when we’re not in the hospital.

We take a seat on one of the tables near the far window. Through the window we can see the road, there’s a narrow pavement between the café and the road, but not many people pass by. It’s too cold for walks already so all we see is cars driving by. When a person walks by though, I see the fog coming out of their mouths as they breathe. It makes our spot cosier since warmth is not something you can see, but; likewise everything, it’s something you can feel better when you’re face to face with its absence.

Indie looks incredible, as usual. I love how pink looks on her and how cosy she looks on her winter clothes. Her hazel eyes bore into mine like she was a deer and I was the spotlight and I don’t know why all of a sudden she’s giving me that look. That’s the look she gives me on the bedroom too.

“How are you?” I start.

“Good.” She shakes.

Am I making her this nervous? I’m the one who’s nervous… Maybe I’m passing it on her. But she just looks so good and soft and fragile… I don’t want to say something that would somehow hurt her. I feel my heart beating fast and hard against my ribs. I’ve never been more afraid of anything on my life but I don’t want her to blame me and I’m afraid she will.

“Are you nervous?”

“No” she shakes her head “I’m just cold.”

“Do you want my jacket?”

I start taking it off before she can answer but she stops me by lifting her hands in the air.

“No, I’ve got my own coat. You’ll freeze.”

“I’m not cold, baby.”

I lend her my jacket and she covers her shoulders with it before she tucks her hands between her thighs trying to warm up. I order two cups of coffee and stare at her.

“You’re always cold.”

It’s true. She always shakes when she ends up alone in the bed because she moves around a lot and unlike me, her hands and her arms are always cold too. She nods and gives me a knowing smile.

“Are you still mad at me?”

She shakes her head. Good. I won’t ask why she was mad in case that makes her mad again. Plus, I’m about to tell her a very intimate part of me. I need her to be on my side.

“And sad?”

Her big eyes look down to the table. The waiter places our two cups on the table and her fingers break the wrapper of a sugar package before she adds some sugar to her coffee.

“I know you are, Indie.” She stirs the coffee. “And I understand.”

The repetitive movement of her hand stops and my heart follows suit when she looks up at me. I’ve never seen her like this before and I wish I could take her pain away but for the first time I don’t feel like she’s better than me. I don’t see her like this girl who takes care of everyone, drinks gin and doesn’t let you get too close. She’s vulnerable and she needs me too.

“I didn’t like that you dropped that bomb like that and just left as if we were strangers but that was not about me, I take it. And after the way you talked to me on the phone, I understood you didn’t want to see me or talk to me and I’ve respected that but-”

“Why did you say you understand?” Her eyes bore into mine and my breath catches on my throat. “You said that that day and you’ve said that now.”

I take a deep breath. Here we go…

“My sister had a car accident when she was twenty-two years old. I know it’s not the same, because she didn’t die, but… She almost did.” My voice croaks but the way she’s looking at me, with brown eyes wide opened and her full lips shut makes me go on. “Uh, she was in a coma for 5 days and… We didn’t know if she was… Going to make it. She did but… Uh… She can’t walk.”

Indie places her hand over mine and only then I realize I’m shaking. She intertwines our fingers and I stare at out hands. Her skin is so much tanner than mine and so much softer too.

“I’m very sorry, Harry.”

How can she be sorry? Her boyfriend died on a car accident. This is not the same… Yet it’s still hard.

“She was pregnant.”

Indie’s eyes sadden further and her grip on my hand tightens. I can’t tell her.

“The baby died on her womb and it teared in the accident so they had to remove it in surgery so… Uh, she can’t carry babies now.”

“Shit.”

“I didn’t help her or anyone at all. I just… I couldn’t. Even now I can’t even look at her without feeling so terrible.” I confess. “And I know she doesn’t want that, she doesn’t need that; but I just… Can’t overcome that, I guess. So… It’s always very hard for me to see her and that obviously has driven me away from my family.”

Indie nods. I guess she doesn’t know what to say to me.

“Is that why you started working so hard?” Her voice comes out in a thin whisper. “You told me you kind of buried yourself in work… Is that why? So that you wouldn’t think about it?”

I nod.

“I was eighteen when that happened and I think that’s the reason why I decided to become a doctor. My sister spent the entire summer in the hospital, you know, learning how to… Be, I guess and after I went to uni and… Everyone was like going out and having fun and meeting new people and falling in love but I just… Was not in that point in my life so I didn’t really make many friends, also because I wouldn’t let many people in and… Yeah, I guess I just started studying a lot and afterwards working a lot.”

“Do you not see your family at all anymore?”

“No, I do.” I nod. “I visit them every once in a while. They were here yesterday and the day before, that’s why I didn’t, uh, I don’t know contact you to try to comfort you even though I don’t think I would have been successful.”

I give her a sad smile that she reciprocates.

“Is that why you can’t sleep?”

Kind of. I nod. I lick my lips before I bring my cup to my lips and take a sip.

“You didn’t have to tell me about this so thank you.” She gives me a sad smile.

“I wanted to.” I confess. “I wanted you to know that you’re not alone and that you can talk to me if you ever… I don’t know.” I smile at her.

“Thank you.” She has a sip of her coffee before she takes a deep breath. “I never really talk about it or him.” Her dark eyebrows lower on her forehead. “I… I… I don’t like how it makes me feel.”

I hold her hand and bring it to my mouth, kissing her skin as she stares at me with a surprised expression. I’m surprised too. I don’t know what I’m doing.

“You don’t have to.” I shrug, trying to dismiss how I just crossed the line. “I just want you to know that if you ever want to or need to, you can tell me.”

“Okay.” She smiles. “But I’m better now anyway.”

“Good.” I rub my hands together as I give her a smile. “Then what do you feel like doing now?”

She chuckles.

“Going shopping with Marie like I told you.”

Oh, so she wasn’t lying.

“Can I go with you and give you girls my opinion on the changing room?”

“Of course not.”

I click my tongue and make a grimace of disappointment that has her chuckling again.

“It was worth a shot.” She agrees making me laugh.

But now I can’t take the image of her perfect body trying on lingerie out of my head. I imagine the way the soft lace would rest on top of her skin because she always wears clothes that fit her perfectly without being tight and that always drives me mad. How easy it is to just slip her panties down her soft legs…

“Don’t go shopping, Indie.”

She frowns. This is insane, how she unwillingly and unknowingly controls my emotions giving me the mood swings of a pregnant woman. She’s driving me crazy for real.

“Don’t you want to show me the underwear you’re wearing now?”

Her eyes widen but don’t leave mine so I smile mischievously. I know her better than she’d like and I know she likes it when I talk dirty to her. It’s like everything we’ve talked about before this, as serious as it was, is not on our minds anymore. It’s hard to think of anything other than her when she’s right in front of me, giving me her attention like she is now, looking at me and listening to me and just being here. I want to be closer to her.

“Do you not want my mouth on you, baby?” I lick my lips and watch her cheeks tinging pink. “Do you want to know what I want?”

Her lips part but instead of answering she takes air in. I don’t need her to say yes for me to know she does want to. She always does.

“I want to put your perfect ass against my kitchen counter and eat you out like you deserve, love.”

Her juicy mouth parts and I feel my dick hardening. She’s so easy, she’s as horny as I am.

“And then I’d fuck you onto the counter until your ass goes numb. Look at you, you’re blushing.” I grin. “It never fails to surprise me how shy you seem to be out of bed and how dirty you are in it.”

“Maybe I’m the perfect example of a lady out and a slut in.”

If she had said that any other way, I would have played along but the way she lifted her chin and clenched her jaw gives her away.

“Indie, you’re not a slut.” She rolls her eyes. “Why? Because you like sex? That doesn’t make you a slut, baby, it makes you a human.”

My hand reaches for her braid and I twirl a finger around it before I grip it between my fingers and gently pull from it bringing her face closer to mine until our lips are inches away.

“I like it” I tell her “that you’re free and you know what you want, it’s fucking sexy, baby.”

I press my lips against hers before she can reprimand me for the PDA and I feel her breath against my mouth as she takes the kiss. It takes her a few seconds to reciprocate but I smile when she bites my bottom lip. I bet she’s shutting her thighs together but before I can check that with my own hand underneath the table, her phone rings and she pulls apart.

“Hi, Marie.” She gives me a death glare as she wipes my saliva from her lips. “I’m having a cup of coffee on” she tilts her neck searching for the name of the cafeteria “on Sionpa, it’s right next to the- oh, right, yeah, yeah, that’s the one but don’t” she all but yells “worry, I can, I’ll go out. There’s no need for you to come all the way here. See you in a second.”

The things she would say not to have her friends see me. I smile as she leaves a bill on the table.

“Here, I’ve got your coffee too.” She says.

“Thank you.”

Her eyes narrow. I know she was expecting a bit of resistance on my part but I know she doesn’t like it when I don’t let her pay so she won’t have it. I grin.

“Oh, Harry!”

Indie turns around and Adam grins at us.

INDIE’S POV

“Indie!” Adam’s face lightens up as he leans in to give me a light hug. “I hadn’t recognized you! It’s very nice to see you! How are you?”

This guy is so well-mannered and friendly. It even surprises me that he’s that close to Harry.

“Hi, Adam. I’m good, thank you, how are you?”

“Good. What a coincidence, hey?”

“Yeah, what are you doing here?” Harry asks him.

He’s stood up from his chair and is now standing next to me with his hand on my low back.

“I need to get my mother a present. It’s not going well.” He smiles.

Harry chuckles.

“Just get her a book.”

“That’s like the least personal thing you could get her.” I complain.

“I don’t think so.” Harry argues back. “A scarf is less personal.”

“You are the king of presents.”

Harry shrugs and Adam chuckles at our interaction.

“Is this what you were having?” Marie points at Harry with raised eyebrows and an annoyed expression.

Oh, shit.

“Marie!”

Adam laughs and my friend her eyes roam up and down his body. He grins at her. Alright, what is going on?

I look at Harry but he seems as lost as I am. He gives me a confused look as if he was waiting for me to solve this but I don’t know what we’re supposed to do either.

“Hi, I’m Adam. I’m a friend of Harry’s.”

“I’m Marie, a friend of Indie’s.”

Adam shakes Marie’s hand and I think everyone can see how she turned into the heart eyed emoji. Oh, Marie, don’t be so obvious… But he hasn’t taken his eyes off her either. She smiles nervously.

“Do you guys want to have a cuppa?”

“Well, we-”

“We’d love one.” Marie smiles.

“Sure.” Harry surprises me.

What are they doing?! I give Harry a death glare but he looks away so I focus on the other little devil.

“What was that? The shops are gonna close.”

“Well” she shrugs “the shops are there every other day.”

I stand there like a fool as Harry brings two more chairs to our table and takes a seat himself. Marie does the same and that’s when my head goes into a short-circuit. I would have never thought I would be having coffee with Harry at some random cafeteria, much less with Marie in what looks like a double date. Harry licks his lips inside his mouth amused and taps the empty chair next to him but I sit down next to Marie.

“Did you call him?” Marie asks me the second I sit down. She’s back. “Or did you follow her around?”

I feel my cheeks heating up but Harry grins as he looks at her.

“Second option.”

“And why do you do that?”

My eyes widen. Did timid Marie just ask that? She’s frowning at him as if she was a cop confronting a criminal and my breath catches on my throat. Harry looks at me before he looks back at my friend.

“Because I like her company.”

“Just because of that?” She challenges.

“Marie, dear Lord, shut it.”

“No” She frowns at me. “This is bad. She’s a lot younger than you, mister, and you’re her mentor, what if-”

“This is half the cuppas.” Adam says as he places a cup of tea before me and the other one before Marie. “I’ll be back with the rest.”

“What’s your game?” She resumes her accusations as soon as Adam walks away. “What do you want from her?”

“Marie, seriously, you’re embarrassing me.”

“Why? If you don’t ask the questions, somebody has to.”

“I’m not a-”

“I’m not playing with Indie.” Harry answers cutting my words short.

He’s studying Marie’s face with a stern expression. I wouldn’t be able to tell what’s going through his mind.

“I never have and what I want from her, she knows perfectly fine since the very first day.”

He doesn’t seem mad or annoyed at my friend’s rude behaviour but I’m beyond embarrassed. Thankfully, Adam arrives with his coffee and Harry’s and takes a seat next to his friend before another word can be spoken.

“Were you guys on a date?”

What is going on today? What sort of question is that? Harry chuckles and only then I realize he’s looking at me. My face must be a technicolour poem.

“No” I answer before Harry can embarrass me any further “we don’t go on dates.”

“I beg to differ.” Harry challenges with a smug smile.

I’m going to kill him. Adam and Marie look at each other trying to see if any of them know what’s going on but I mean neither do I.

“So how long for have you guys known each other?” He asks Marie.

Thank God, I need a break. Harry’s still smiling at me, he’s clearly loving this.

“Four years. We go to uni together.”

“Oh, so you study Medicine too?”

“Yes.” Marie nods.

“Oh, gosh, three nerds and me.” Adam jokes and my friend laughs.

“What did you study?” She asks. “If you studied at all.” She panics. “Because it’s fine if you didn’t. I mean you don’t have to, you know, it’s a valid choice not to and it’s also a valid choice to study. Please somebody stop me.”

Adam throws his head back and laugh and Harry fights against his smile but fails. Marie is adorable.

“I studied Journalism.”

“Oh.” Marie nods. “It sounds interesting.”

“Well” he shrugs “I’m currently working at this big cosmetics firm. I’m the crisis management responsible.” He nods. “I get all these free products that I don’t even know how to use.”

I chuckle. He’s great, what a subtle way of letting my friend know he doesn’t have a girlfriend. I almost bow at him.

“Really?” Marie chuckles. “That’s so cool!”

He chuckles and frowns.

“I mean, you can have them even though you don’t need them.”

I try to control my chuckle because he’s not laughing but I catch Harry rolling his eyes from the corner of mine. He then looks at me and smiles. My phone screen lightens up and Harry’s eyes drop on it too. He’s the nosiest person I’ve ever met. It’s an Instagram notificacion.

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