#no but on days I am having a panic attack is is sure as heck good for my soul

[princescribbler]

YOUR DYNAMIC IS YOUR DYNAMIC: IT DOESN'T NEED TO FIT ANYONE ELSE"S IDEAS!

(Pre-emptive content warning: discussions of depression, fetishism, ABDL, D/s, fairly extreme Ageplay and regression dynamics, and broader power exchange dynamics)

It's often hard to explain to people what my kink dynamic looks like with my fiance/ partner/ mommy-domme @giggle-byte. Am I her little? Yes. 24/7 diapers? Absolutely. Do I wear a chastity cage most days, and follow detailed routines and rules? ABSOLUTELY! So do I feel like she's the only one in charge, I'm this completely regressed and controlled 'slave', and we're 24/7 D/s? Absolutely not, and I'll try to explain why a bit further below. But also... kind of yes? But not in the way people seem to think!

See, I've been into forced regression, unpotty training, pretty intense ABDL and MD/lb things for as long as I can recall. Heck, most of my dating history I was the daddy domme like 70% of the time or more, instead of like 10-15% in my current dynamic. So finding a full-time mommy-domme and lifelong kink partner would, in theory, result in extreme lifestyle changes. Sure, some happened...but nothing i didn't ask for, beg for, PLEAD for over years of my life. Nothing was done i didn't consent to, agree with, and even generally DESIRED to have! The point i'm trying to make is this: I expected a specific 'version' of what it meant to have a mommy-domme, and especially a 24/7 dynamic, and i was just...wrong! See, my dynamic is based on MY needs, not the ones my penis thinks of when it's hard, and not the ones i read about online. my needs are mine, and they don't necessarily MATCH the expectation online! So why bother getting my partner to give me detailed rules, give me structure, etc? because it WORKS FOR US, and IS WHAT I WANT! Why do I have a bedtime? Because i struggled with tiredness at work in the morning and thrive on routine. The chastity? Well, i had panic attacks around sex, and momma suggested at first it would take my mind off the idea of having to 'perform'. Soon, i liked the whole idea, the control, the teasing, the build up...but i also didn't like actually feeling denied, and frankly when we first started, i had a pretty low sex-drive....so weirdly, my amazing fiance @giggle-byte actually helped me 'regain' some of that sex drive, enjoy and embrace...via CHASTITY! And now, it's actually her who is the amazing, controlled, thoguhtful one who handles that for me. I can ask to lock, unlock, etc...but the truth is she knows what i can and can't cope with and gives it to me without me needing to ask! But it's NOT about denial...she unlocks me every day, with few exceptions. It's not about control: I have the key, a backup key, a third backup, even in play where i 'lock the key away' in a timer lock i genuinely can't get into...it's never off my keyring as a spare. The idea is the DYNAMIC is there...but the daily rules are more open, flexible, and based on our mutual desires and needs!

Every time we reassess our dynamic we run into this over and over. Too many online stories, too many fantasies, and not enough realistic reality or even modern and flexible dynamics crept into our expectations...and suddenly, we realized that we aren't doing a 24/7 ABDL and MD/lb (and switch DD/lg dynamic, though she's slightly more private about her little side) relationship the way anyone was expecting...but it was WORKING for us very well, DESPITE that?!

The point I'm trying to make is this; Your dynamic, relationship, and needs are YOURS and won't look like a cookie-cutter idea. For some people into MD/lb, they want chastity, denial, cock and ball torture, humiliation, degradation, and the like. For some, it's purely non-sexual, cute, and loving. For us...it's sometimes very flexible, but generally it's more focused on cuteness, structure, routine, and supporting us both in our mutually shared kinky desires!

To wrap this rant up: Let's go through a few quick examples of what the EXPECTATION of a dynamic like ours usually is, and then compare it to what MY relationship looks like. Expectation/archetype against the reality!

Chastity Expectation: to be locked, denied, teased, humiliated, left wanting and desperate or degraded or even cuckolded! My Dynamic/Chastity Reality: momma uses it like a sex toy, it's not required, it's a thing i only wear for a few hours most days, but i CAN feel the desire for more...and one wore it the better part of a month, without prior experience with that, and loved it!

Diapers 24/7 Expectation: Public humiliation against my will to forcibly infantilize, regress, and humiliate or control me! My Dynamic/Diaper Reality: It's my fucking kink, i CLEARLY enjoy it and momma helped me stop feeling ashamed and worried. in fact, it's not a profound comfort and sort of security-blanket.

Switch Relationship Expectation: To constantly swap roles, or to only stay in one role at a time, or to at the very least struggle with who is 'big' and who is 'little' at any given time. My Switch Reality: It's fluid, happens without a ton of effort (admittedly this took time to establish), i can be 'baby prince papi' while she's still my 'princess'...even if it's 'momma princess'. Our roles don't match the traditional expectations.

24/7 ABDL and MD/lb Expectation: A lifestyle of complete submission, regression, denial, control, humiliation, and sexual frustration in order to become more and more needy and desperate...Eventually usually implied to end in either permanent regression, cuckolding, etc. My 24/7 ABDL and MD/lb Reality: Basically just the fun parts of that, without sexual frustration, plus my sex drive went from 'once a week' to '3-5x a day' and has made me happier, healthier, more confident, cute, and self-accepting. Oh and i get all my kinky desires met, fulfill the love of my life's kinky fantasies, al while getting MORE sexy fun, MORE relaxation, and IMPROVED mental as well as physical well-being. You know...NOT what i was told I'd receive!

So fuck the idiots who demand you follow their idea of kink. Well, don't actually fuck them, they don't deserve it, but i mean....ignore and disregard them! You don't have to have a dynamic that fits any traditional guidelines, rules, etc. If you want to have a unique dynamic, CELEBRATE your uniqueness and finding someone who shares it with you! And for god's sake, don't expect each other to fulfil a role neither of you signed up for, ok? It's OK to have a fantasy and yet find the reality unpleasant, preferring to live in a gentler, nicer lifestyle. Give yourself permission to be unique, creative, and DEFINE your needs rather thna having them defined for you! I promise: it pays off in spades!

As always, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay kinky!

-Scribbler

[rust-is-a-car-disease]

Vtk hc(s) ✨

Cassian and water things to do with how he died (water, awareness, miscellaneous, falling)

All of this is from memory so im not sure if its accurate. Either way its fun to think about! If i remember correctly he fell/got thrown off (idr remember) a cliff into the ocean.

*water may also refer to relevent liquids in general

Cassian is afraid of being submerged in water. He may be uncomfortable depending on the amount of water hes in and how deep it is and stuff like that but being fully submerged is immediate panic. On bad days he tries to avoid water all together. (This becomes a problem to stay hydrated) A lot of the times, not being able to easily touch the bottom with his head still sticking out also causes panic. The exception is very good days and even then he struggles a lot. Baths are a no. He spends minimal time if hes in a place that could hold water, depending on how much it could hold and his mood. Ex. If hes having a shower on a bad day in a bathtub like in a hotel or smtg, he wouldnt spend a lot of time other then absolute nessecary to make sure hes clean. (This might just be me projecting how easy it is for me to overthink things.) If hes say, in a place that could flood like a flood prone basement and its raining, he would get the heck out immediately if theres nothing urgent to do there.

Oh! And other aspects other than just bodies of water. He wont drink salty drinks. The ocean and wave sounds make him antsy. He hates the smell and taste of super salty stuff, esp ones that remind him of the ocean. He stays away from edges near water. He gets extra cautious near cliffs. He tends to keep an eye out for possible vantage points for snipers. Hes overall more paranoid and vigilant.

Another thing is falling. Its an iffy thing where sometimes it doesnt affect him, sometimes he can barely stand losing his balance. Its quite random but for the most part hes fine. Like he could fall down the stairs and feel mentally completely fine but sometimes he'd stumble a bit and feel out of breath from a moment of panic/expecting something to go wrong. The first time it happened he just stood there shocked for a bit.

Alternatively: he would subconsciously pick and choose certain things he'd still do above, but he would unknowingly for a while ignore the rest even if he feels like he should do it. Ex. He might still feel breathless from tripping or avoid salty drinks, one bc its unnavoidable and another bc its a more obvious point of memory (subconscious things are also unavoidable mostly), but ignore any discomfort from edges and stuff and so not being as careful as he would if he acknowledged the discomfort. He doesnt even realise he does it at all for a while, it just sorta happens. (I am probably projecting here)

Ehm before i forget, suffocation is kinda similar to drowning right? (Not really but i think it works) so he positions himself in a way where nothing would be covering his breathing on bad days. (This is more like a 'dont forget this!!!' For me... i think itll be interesting to think about how certain habits and actions would change after and comparing suffocation to drowning, overall i think it might not have as big an impact as other lasting effects)

I want to talk about how like the attacks and seeing jeff die and other stuff may affect him but i havent even fully formed those thoughts yet.

Ugh i also want to talk about temperature and other stuff but i am tired now. So this is more like a to think about list!

[november-rising]

The Color Blue: I love it and may read too much into it

Earlier, I was at work doing, you know, working-like things and my mind decided to flash to this scene:

I watched Season Two, Episode Eight (Bolognese) and Episode Nine (Omelette) again and questions. Many fantastic folks have shared commentaries and metas about the imagery, the symbolism, the soundtrack, the cinematography - everything!(@thoughtfulchaos773, @unladyboss, @gingerylangylang1979 are just the few that hit. I'm sorry if I missed anyone. I'm sure I did. This fandom is too creative and intuitive for me to keep up with!)

And my okey-doke foolish self is wondering: "okay but why am I seeing this image of Sydney changing in the same dim, dark blue sexy lighting as Carmy being intimate with Claire?"

(Side note: DAMN that opening intimate scene in Omelette got me into and applauding Carmen. Get your sensuality on!!!!)

This above scene was sliced in with Carmy making dinner for Claire in episode eight. Then, as I said, the next episode opens with the mood lighting. Like...huh? I mean, really? These two women, similar lighting, personal moments? What is happening?

But then we are cut to Carmen's panic attack. The world we are shown is in cooler blue tones as he's zoomed in on i that back alley.

Those in the flashbacks that are in warmer colors/tones are taunting, patronizing, and disregarding of Carmen.

Throughout all of this, when Carmen is cut back to in cooler hues, who else do we see filmed in such a light? Sydney.

To cap it all off, the immediate scene after Carmen settles and smiles is of Sydney approaching the almost completed Bear, her saturation (is that a term? is that a film term thing or am i making words up to sound smart-ish?) is in the same paler, calmer blue.

We also see this blue hue in the BOH during the final episode as Carmen starts spiraling. As he shouts for a re-fire, Sydney holds him accountable and he actually takes a breath. He stops, sees her, and apologizes. He tried to manage his emotions.

(I couldn't find the gif or such where you see Sydney telling him to cool it out before he actually listens to her. If anyone can send me that, I'd appreciate it!)

I tried to be more aware while watching this episode in particular and I noticed that, when Carmy is trapped in his own making - I mean trapped in the walk-in, he's filmed in a clear blue tone.

To my untrained eye, in this picture, the deeper blue transitioning into something lighter is significant. Is this a way to show intimacy? To show Carmen connecting back with his personal like? Him finding a way to process it? HECK! This color scheme showed itself when he met Claire in the grocery store. Does this color palette represent Carmen being faced with having a personal life? To be around others who want to see him can be daunting yet muted and depressing.

Too many thoughts I'm trying to express HOURS after my original thought all the while fighting off going to sleep.

To wrap this whole thing up on a random note, this song from way back in my high school emo days came to mind. I seems to fit our boy Carmen.

Goodnight.

[tonberry-yoda]

Omg how didn’t I see those??? Gonna binge them right away 🤩

So sorry for not seeing those! 😭😭

Ok hereby i request a Full fluff alphabet for sweet Toge 💜

I’ll wait until you finish everything until further requests haha

Aww your writing makes MY day my dear!! 🌻

Srsly I’ve been having a hard time lately because I fell I’ll and I’m still recovering and reading your sweet stories gets me through my boring days

i made those two alphabets towards the beginning of me writing on tumblr here, so i really hope you enjoyed those if you ended up reading them! and i love that you said you'd wait for everything else to be done for this request, but here i am doing it lmaoooo. these are actually easy for me, even if time consuming! so i really hope you enjoy!! love you 🌻anon and im really glad i can help you through a hard time that means a lot and you are such a sweetheart, thank you for all of the support.

now let's stop rambling and get onto the alphabet!

Fluff Alphabet with Toge

Pairing - Toge x reader

Warnings - none!

Notes - (post inspired by this) thank you love! i had a lot of fun doing this and toge is such a cutie! thank for the request and please enjoy! i hope you have a good day today and stay hydrated!!!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

just spending time outside is a must

whether it be enjoying the afternoon air or the stars above, you two always find yourselves outside when spending time together

picnics are your thing for sure

you make a super cute picnic with cake and drinks and just a ton of snacks and then you and him walk over to somewhere cute and eat together in silence

just because he's quiet though doesnt mean hanging out is awkward

its actually nice

peaceful

especially in the winter time

you still go outside and do stuff like watch the snow, but you're in each other's arms while doing so

what a cutie omg

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

he loves your voice

the fact that he cant really use his makes him love yours more

he's a fantastic listener and overall just loves hearing you talk

could listen to you all day if you were willing to talk for that long

he thinks everything about you is beautiful, but again, he just cant get over your voice

especially if your a singer, you would kill that poor man

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

he would just listen

he's not a panicky guy, so if you're in the middle of something like a panic attack, he brings you what you need calmly and then just sit next to you, ready to hear what you have going on

and if you need space, he'll give it to you

cuddles? heck yeah, bring it in

he just wants to be there for you, he would never leave you when you're sad or down in anyway

would rub your back always

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

he cant see a life without you

whether it be marriage or just there to support you, toge wants you in his life forever

he knows your strong, so he always sees the two of you becoming professional sorcerers

but overall, he just cannot think to live without you

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

let's be honest here, since you're the one doing all the talking, you're definitely the dominant one

you literally have to order food for this man

you work really hard to do your best as a sorcerer and toge literally hold you up like you are a god/goddess/deity

he prefers you being dominant because he gets all nervous in situations without you lol

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

he doesnt like to fight with you, so he will try to avoid that at all costs

but in the situation that you two end up fighting, you just go silent around each other

you let your thoughts simmer before you actually end up communicating

it ends up being an easily forgiven situation and you just end up laughing it off later

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

this man is so grateful to have you in his life

he would do anything for you and knows that you would do the same for him

you two are like two halves of a whole and without each other, the world would honestly be empty

he is more grateful to you than anyone else (which says a lot because he holds his friends pretty highly)

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

its hard to share everything when you cant really talk lol

there's a lot about himself that you dont know

you dont really know about his family or how he grew up, but that's because you never asked

he doesnt share everything, but he's not trying to intentionally hide anything from you

he respects and loves communication in a relationship, but that's hard when you dont really have a voice to speak it

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

i feel like you both really didnt change

you fell in love with who he was and it was the same for him

nothing about either of you really changed

he's still more reserved, even if you try to get him out of his shell

i feel like the real change or lesson you would learn is how to work better together

whether that be in real fighting situations, arguments with each other, or even just class work

you're just finding better ways to work together

so personal problems are just another bump for you to try to get over together

it leaves you on your toes, so it's actually quite fun sometimes

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

I feel like he doesnt have a huge jealousy problem

EXCEPT

when you are talking to a guy and your adorable laugh slips out

your voice is reserved for toge and toge only lol

hearing that gorgeous little laugh or hearing you sing for others just sparks a new feeling in his chest that he doesnt like

to deal with it, he just rushes over to you and stands as close as possible so he can hear it first hand while looking the other person dead in the eye

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

OMG YES

this man has the cutest smallest softest lips ever

its like kissing a soft little cloud or a stuffed animal or something

and he slides his hand behind your ear, moving you hair out of the way

*dies*

it would always be one little kiss and then he'd just press more and more onto your lips

you know the little kiss sesh is over when he places a big kiss on your cheek and smiles at you

the first kiss happened so suddenly

y'all were just hangin out, watchin the moon, and he pressed a kiss onto your cheek, which then became your lips, and then you ended up kissing for a few minutes under the stars

wish that was me omg

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

HE WOULD WRITE YOU A LITTLE NOTE

y'all were just studying in the library when he slipped over a note that said:

will you go out with me? :)

how could you say no?

you two ended up passing notes the whole time instead of studying lol

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

as long as that means he can be in your life forever, then yes

he would pass you a note again just cuz it's so flippin cute

he would pass you the note and then the box

then you'd throw your arms around him crying and he'd let a few tears fall himself

the wedding would be super small

maybe you would just get eloped, idk

it would be a very quiet wedding too

you would just hand each other your vows and read them with misty eyes before you two kiss

i think he would say "i do" in order to really keep you guys married

omg that would be so cute

would shock everyone there lol

even you

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

at first you didnt think he called you any nicknames since he cant talk

but then you noticed him saying sushi a lot around you which was a new one

so you just assume that he calls you sushi lol

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

GOO GOO EYES

he cant help but stare at you

with loving eyes ofc

he always passes you little notes telling you how much he loves you

he cant help it

its actually only obvious to you

a lot of people dont know since he's so to himself

you, on the other hand, can notice it from a mile away lol

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

HECC NO

its not that he doesnt love you

he would just prefer it if... you didnt touch him in front of a bunch of people lol

he'll gladly hold your hand, but he wont like cuddle you or makeout with you in front of a bunch of people

he just gets too flustered

what a cutie

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship.

GREAT KISSER

and really good and comforting you

and just like really good at being there

also great cuddles lol

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

i feel like he would do anything to make you happy, but he's not the super romantic type

like no flowers or romantic dinners

just outdoor dates with the moon and stars chillin with ya

just being close to you is enough for the both of you

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

oh absolutely

he is your #1 supporter

you guys support each other and that is super important to the both of you

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

he doesnt need anything but you with a smile on your face to make the relationship work

he doesnt need a thrill

so in that sense, you are very more routine

you are free together in the relationship, so you dont need to see each other 24/7, but having you there makes him happy

just seeing you once or more in a day is good enough for him

but when you start living together and are a part of each other, you two just do your own thing, but with the other right by your side

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

he knows you super well

he knows what you need when you're sad and knows what you need when you're happy

if you're in a position where you just dont want to talk to or see anyone, he will leave you be, he is super empathetic of your feelings

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

this relationship is super important to him

even if he doesnt see you 24/7, just having you in his life means the world to him

this relationship is worth a lot and he never wants it to end

he really thinks he has found the one in you and wouldnt want to give that up for anything

you support him and he does the same, so without that, he would feel empty somewhere in his soul

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

every night before bed, the two of you cuddle up and watch a movie and then just end up falling asleep together

he just loves sleeping in a bed with you

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

YES

but not in front of people ofc

he just loves you hug and hold you while no one else is there

i think he would be really cold, so he would warm himself by your warmth under the blanket while laying little kisses all over your face before falling asleep

Y earning - How will they cope when they're missing their partner?

he would feel like something is missing

he gets in a really sad spot and kind of just... waits for you to get back

expect a lot of loving texts from him

he'll just curl up and watch a movie, wishing you were next to him :(

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

oh absolutely

man would take a bullet for you

he cares about you so much he will do anything, but only if you think the same way about him

he will fight for you and with you

he couldnt imagine a life without you

[mings]

Chicken update:-

This "The Last of Us", avian version. These are the three surviving girls. Although they're not in good shape, at least all three are alert, even if only one is sufficiently mobile to venture out of the coop. (The purple is antibacterial and antimicrobial spray on their injuries.)

I found a vet who'll see them tomorrow. I'm dreading it in case they recommend euthanasia. I'm not sure how or even if I'll cope with that. The bird rescue had some good advice, but they come from an ethical position that says every life is worth saving. Their success rate is better than 75% with raptors that have been involved in collisions with cars. They can't take on domestic birds though, so I'm dependent on the vet.

The coops have both had security upgrades. I didn't realise weasels only need a 20mm gap (that's about the size of a US quarter if I recall correctly). So, I've temporarily blocked the ventilation holes (not entirely, of course) and there's no gap more than a few millimetres anywhere now.

That doesn't help during the day. The pens are fox-proof, but an emboldened weasel would have no trouble. There are stoats and pine martens about too, although they're much bigger and mostly abroad at night. We've seen foxes on our land, but no evidence (yet) of pine martens. I'm hoping we're too open for them to venture this far out of the forest.

I'm currently struggling with my feelings. I have no idea how or why I get so attached to animals; I just do. They're a huge part of what makes me who I am.

My instinct was to lash out and put down kill traps for the weasels. Today I'm more rational. The weasel was doing what weasels do. Why? To survive. Simple as. What's wrong with that? OK, the carnage is distressing, but that kill mode is survival too. As long as the hens are shrieking, the weasel is at risk. All mustelids (and foxes) will do the same. They kill until it goes quiet. Ironically, if the hens froze in silence, they'd probably only lose one per visit. How many of us would be able to not panic in the same circumstances?

Killing weasels for being weasels doesn't sit well with me. Heck, we have crows that plague the life out of us by attacking our windows every morning as it gets light. Local farmers say "shoot them". I disagree. I'd rather try to engage with them and give them something more interesting to do.

If I take revenge on the weasel population, it won't bring back my hens. Neither will it dent the weasel population because more will move into the vacant territory. It certainly won't make me feel better, and it will make me every bit as bad as the farmer who gives their animals "the best life" when they only have the express intention of killing them.

So I'll pick up the pieces and do a better job on the new generation's coops. We literally only just committed to a breeding program that will focus on rare and endangered breeds. That is paramount; it's not too dramatic to say that some breeds will simply die out otherwise. I have to do better for them.

Last night I sat on the floor in the room nearest the coops with Bailey snuggled against me. I couldn't sleep; the days events and images just replayed continually. Today, I've watched over the hens constantly. Now, they're secure in their upgraded coops and I'm exhausted. Emotionally and physically a wreck. Tomorrow I have to be on my game early for the trip to the vet, so I have to try and rest tonight.

If you read this far you deserve a pat on the back. Thanks for bearing with me.

[kanndlila]

Frog Brain

Bully!Scaramouche x Reader Highschool AU

Also: Kazuha x Onesided!Reader; might expand this in the future; reader is gender neutral; I wrote this at 1 AM; not beta read;

TW: Swearing, Panic attacks, Dissection,

Frogs, Lizards, and Chicks. All three have been samples of your highschool dissections. However, for the final year of your high school, instead of bunnies, you have to extract brains from frogs instead. While rabbits seem to be a more educational option at this point, the number of people tearing up in last year’s dissection of the chick made your science teacher reconsider his choices. 

‘Whoever manages to extract a full frog brain without damage gets additional points for the final’ he said. Now, you’re minutes before the said class starts. You can’t be in the lab without a lab coat, and like the klutz brain you are, you forgot your lab coat on this special day. 

“Are you okay Y/N?” Keqing asks. Oh archons, the panic is setting in. You take shallow breaths. Knowing there’s only one more class doing the dissection on the same day as you do, you asked your friends, “Do you know anyone in the Inazuma class? I forgot my lab coat…” Your heart bleeds at the realization that your dissection bag did not contain your lab coat. You only had a small circle of friends, mostly those who are academically focused but not in the levels of those in the Celestia section. 

“Maybe I do… hold on, let me ask one of my friends there.” Beidou quickly types something on her phone. “Thanks Beidou, I owe you.” 

“Who the heck forgets their lab coat on dissection day?” A voice you know all too well interjects, you can already hear him rolling his eyes. “Scaramouche don’t be mean.” Childe just pushes him away. Normally you’d bash his face in but no, doing that will cause you more trouble and he isn’t worth your time and energy. ‘He isn’t worth your time nor energy.’ You silently repeat yourself until the rage dies down.

“Beidou you needed Ayaka’s lab coat?” Thoma came over. You used to be classmates until you had enough of Scaramouche’s bullying and you demanded a section change from your principal several months back. You didn’t have any close friends in that section anyway so you initiated the move. “Hi Y/N!” Thoma greeted you. You smiled back. “Actually it’s for me. Is that alright? I’ll return it before your class goes in for the dissection.” “Sure!” He handed over the neatly folded lab coat. I smelled faintly of Sakuras. 

An hour. That’s all you have to extract 2 frog brains, which according to your science teacher, may not be enough time. He had to ask another class for their time but given that the next class is math, the math teacher didn’t give in so you had to go back to math class after an hour in the laboratory, then come back to the lab right after since the history teacher kindly gave his time. On the other hand, the other section got lucky with 2 hours of uninterrupted lab time. 

Mr. Baizhu gave a short orientation of how it’s supposed to go. First, take out the boiled frogs, which were initially dissected a day prior, out of the alcohol solution, then pin everything into place, and by some miracle, take out the brain from the cranium squished between the two eye sockets of the amphibian; intact, twice for the bonus points, otherwise the grade is going to depend on whether or not it’s recognizable. That and the trip to the lab took 15 minutes. So you only had 40 minutes left, allotting 5 minutes to return the lab coat to Thoma.

Your friends were gathered around you. Yelan, Beidou, and Ningguang going through each of their frogs. Might as well get a start on yours. You twisted the unneeded limbs and bones apart leaving you with the frog’s ‘skull’ on the first frog. Mr. Baizhu didn’t explain how to do it, only where it is and that it should be intact. 

You used your dissecting scissors to get the ‘skull’ to open. Out goes a squid looking… meat? Compared to the brown-charred frog skin and bones, this one looked like shrimp meat in the shape of a tiny squid. You put it in a vial of alcohol and put a sign on the cap to label it as yours before you went to Mr. Baizhu before looking at the clock. 15 minutes left.

“Yes, that’s it! Excellent work Y/N. It’s intact!” He returned the vial to you, probably so he can check it with the 2nd brain later.

You were feeling a little euphoric but the race doesn’t end here. You only have 13 minutes left when you come back to your station to extract the second brain out. Now that you know how to approach the beast, you went in to quickly finish the beast. By the time you finished, there was only 3 minutes left and- “Y/N?” Thoma is already looking for you.

“I’m almost done, sorry Thoma. 2 minutes!” You called out. In your haste, you gripped your tweezers too hard and made a cut along the stem of your frog brain. Ah shit, there goes all your hard work. You put it in the vial, trashed your gloves, and swiftly washed your hands before coming over to Thoma, who now has Ayaka by his side, alongside the whole other class… and that unpleasant midget from earlier, huffing at the sight of you. You took off the lab coat and handed over the lab coat to Ayaka as gracefully as you could, thanking her and bowing several times, relief only flooding through your veins now. You didn’t have to have a lab coat anymore because technically you were done. 

“Class you can leave everything as is, you’ll be returning later anyways but if you have your frog brains already, please take the vials with you.” Mr. Baizhu headed out of the lab room to accompany the other class into another laboratory.

“Help me with my frog brain later Y/N!” Xiangling said outloud, taking your vials and giving them to you. You muttered a small thank you then your eyes absentmindedly sifted through the other class though. “Ohoho! Looking for your boyfie?” You glared at Beidou. A brow going up and down from disbelief. “Uh… WHAT?!” Your brain short circuited. While it’s true you do have your eyes for someone, however he wanted a blueberry cheesecake when you were a black forest cake. Definitely not his taste. It does not help that the said cheesecake just saved your klutzy ass from missing the 30% of your grade altogether.

“You’re overthinking again Y/N” Yelan pointed out, looking at your crestfallen face. The past hour has been very stressful for you. “I can’t really help it if he thinks she’s perfect.” You still had math class coming up too. You knew that statistics would fry your brain further and as one of the less than five people who actually do the math homework, you have to save the brain power. 

In the middle of means, medians, modes, and cumulative frequencies, a knock comes on your classroom door, Xingqiu, being the closest to the door, answers it. “Y/N, Mr. Baizhu needs your vials.” Xingqiu went back on his seat while Ms. Guizhong continued on with the statistics lesson. You grabbed your vials, making sure each one has a sign only you can draw by heart, before heading outside the door to hand them over to- “Thank you. Mr. Baizhu said you can have them back as soon as your class heads back to the labs.” Kazuha’s soothing voice resonated in your mind. “Okay.” You smiled at him as farewell before retreating back into the classroom, blood pumping in your ears and you sure do hope that it isn’t on your face.

Oh you wished Math lasted longer. There were two things you are good at academically. Math and Science and as of now, you are seeking refuge from the latter. But alas, you have learned that all good things must come to an end and you must face your adversaries with resiliency.

Your class started to head back to the laboratory to continue with your dissection and without Mr. Baizhu, who was still in the other laboratory helping the other class, you took it upon yourself to go around and help people locate and extract the frog brain. Not 10 minutes in, Mr. Baizhu went into the laboratory to do some rounds and instructed you to go to the other classroom to help his aide, Albedo. When you stepped in the classroom, you already knew that you were going to be reprimanded for your lack of proper lab attire but the Albedo let you in anyways since it looks like he’s having a hard time trying to help  Scaramouche, who, had mush on his dissecting plates. You unintentionally snicker. He glared at you before you turned your back on him and helped Yae Miko. There’s no way anyone can save his ass now.

“You’re doing good Miko, you just have to separate these two sides so you can have better access.” You pointed to the eye sockets. “Oh thank you Y/N. I missed you, you know?” She giggled before going on with her first frog. “Ei you have to be careful or the brain will be a mush.” “Thoma careful on the scissors, that’s how I cut the second brain that I had.” “Same for you Ayaka, oh wow, this is your second brain already?” You picked up her first sample. The top half is intact but the same cannot be said for the mush that is the bottom. You put it down before you made a swift pass on the next table. “Gorou be a bit more gentle with the tweezers are you’re going to rip it in half.” You pretend to spend more time with him before going to the next one. “You’re trying to break bones, not carving gelatin Kazuha, you can go more aggressive on the bones.” You made a second round, happy with the progress everyone is making with one or both brains good for them already. All that’s left is the scavenger hunt that is within Scaramouche’s dissecting pans with Albedo.

“You’re going to have to redo this. There’s no way you’re going to find a brain in this.” Albedo sighed and stood up, filing a form for additional frogs to be ordered for the next dissection. Everyone else is already cleaning up and there he was, staring at his dissecting pans. From the hallway, your friends call out for you, looks like most of them were done as well and of course, was granted an early dismissal. You said your farewells, not leaving Scaramouche’s table, then Kazuha blocked your view of the door. 

“I believe this is yours.” He returned your frog brains and stayed to stare at Scaramouche’s pan of questionable things. “Leave me be.” He finally uttered, the down-sticken boy. His despair was brought by 2 mutilated frogs on his pans. 

You tsked, grabbing one of his vials, and rolled your eyes. Taking pity on the sad, sad boy. You poured the contents of your vial with the intact frog brain into his vial. “You’re lucky Mr. Baizhu only needs one of these.” You shake the vial in front of his face as he eyed the vial, “Congratulations, you now have a brain of a frog.” worded like it was his own brain, ha! So clever, who knew it’s this easy to move Scaramouche to tears, well, near-tears? You left the vial on the table, Kazuha processing what just happened before starting to clean Scaramouche’s mess for him, the fragile boy holding on to the brain in the vial while he tries to sort out the one in his skull. "Albedo, we got the brain. There's no need for additional frogs." He nodded and you head out the door. You still had your own station to clean up anyway.

[ilikecheeseandchocolatee]

Rant again. This one isn’t so serious but if you’re not in the right mental space then still don’t read it.

It’s my ex’s birthday today. He’s 18 now. I haven’t thought about him in so long ever since moving away but my calendar told me today about his birthday and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him. It feels like a relapse, doing so well for a long time and suddenly there’s a slip up. It’s just so hard to stop thinking about him now that I’ve started.

And I keep wondering if he really is a bad person or not. Because I’ve heard of how he treated girls in his year before I came to school, I’ve even seen some of the messages he sent them (I saw them after we broke up). It’s just creepy and awful, and therefore he must be a creep. Right? But when we were together he was always so so respectful with me. He never did anything I didn’t want him to, he made sure I was comfortable with everything he did, he respected my pronouns and my boundaries, and all that good stuff. Heck he even told my best friend that he was considering giving up drinking for my sake. I’m starting to think it was all a facade, because later when I had a panic attack due to descriptions of him at a party with alcohol (apparently I have alcohol anxiety or something), he must have decided that it’s too hard to keep up with the facade until I gave him sex and then he dumped me? Like he knew I am ace, I told him that before we started dating, just so he’d know what he’d be getting into. And then 2 weeks after he rejects me he sleeps with my best friend. It wasn’t even her fault, he was in a position of power over her and she couldn’t exactly refuse. Which definitely means he’s not a good guy. He was just so nice with me. I genuinely felt happy with him until the end. He stuck with me through multiple self sabotage phases that I had. And according to a lot of people at school, I’m the first person he’s ever “cared” about. Like when I had a panic attack at school and I just sort of shut myself off from everyone and refused to take my head out of my hands, he just sat there with me for like an hour. He is physically incapable of keeping still for too long and he did it for the first time when I needed some support. If it was a facade he was really goddamn good at it.

Humans are so confusing because they’re NEVER black and white. Someone can’t be all good and they can’t be all bad. Sometimes it’s just purely subjective. I can’t label him as a bad guy when he was so respectful with me, and I can’t call him a good guy when he made so many girls before and after me uncomfortable. I could never hate him but I also hate him so much. I hope he never succeeds in his life but I hope he gets where he wants to. I hope he never has a girlfriend but I also hope he finds the one some day and learns what love is, and the difference between love and lust. I guess most of all I hope I forget him as soon as I can, because unlike my first relationship, this one only taught me one thing and it’s that no one can be trusted with my heart again.

Hopefully getting it all out in this post will help me sleep. He can be 18 and drink all he wants now. That thought should deter my thoughts about him I guess.

[rangergurlgleek1211]

One Line Any Fic

Tagged by the lovely @ravens-words.

Rules: pick any 10 of your fics, scroll somewhere to the mid point, pick a line, and share it! then tag 10 people.

A bad Day To Break Down (Tarlos)

As soon as Nancy hangs up, Carlos is dialing TK’s number, cursing in Spanish as TK’s voicemail kicks in. Trying two more times and still getting TK’s voicemail, Carlos quickly gets dressed, grabs his keys, and even takes his gun from the safe in their bedroom.

A Shock To The System (Tarlos)

“No, Mijo, this isn’t your fault. Please don’t be so hard on yourself,” Andrea soothed him, her motherly voice surrounding him like one of those warm embraces his mother used to give when he felt like everything was collapsing around him. That tone had always meant family, home, and safety to him, and TK had been sure he had lost it with his mother’s death. Until this moment. “He’s strong, my Carlitos. He would never leave this world knowing you were right here waiting for him. He has to be fine,” Andrea continued, her words sounding so sure, giving him the strength he needed. “Pray with me, Mijo.”

I Could Really Use A Hug (Tarlos)

TK doesn’t know how much time has passed when he notices his dad and Tommy come into the bunk room, hesitantly standing at the door but not approaching. They're having a quiet conversation he can’t hear. His dad eventually begins to start toward him but Tommy’s hand on his shoulder stops him as she nods to the left, looking at something or someone outside the room.

That first night TK,That night i told myself seeing you at the bar. "I'm going to Marry him." (Tarlos)

“Yeah babe, that night while I was leaning against the bar, I noticed you smiling and laughing with your new crew. I was in awe. I never thought I would find someone in Austin. I was at a loss for words until I walked up to you when your friends went dancing. I knew then I just had to ask you to at least dance with me........"

Actually TK He is My Ex-Boyfriend (Tarlos)

“Oh just spit it out!!, it can’t be that bad, He mess up your organised desk, or has done something to disrupt you being a control freak ” TK replied sarcastically, laughing as he finished.

Why Can't things ever be simple? (Tarlos)

“My team has, I’m so happy I found you and your both okay. Or just about. What happened here, mate.” Tk asks as he crouched down in front of the injured boy.

“ We ran into a coyote, we tried to run but max fell. I think he broke his leg.” Chris explained.

We're a family, we will always have each others backs! (Tarlos+Firefam)

“How the heck did I miss that memo Strand” Captain Jacobs booms from behind them.

Everyone jumped at his sudden appearance.

“ That explains everything much clearer now, especially since you struggle to do your job correctly,” Samuels exclaims.

Am I Not Good Enough? (Tarlos/2x06 Coda)

“Hey” Carlos tips Tk’s chin up to look at him “If it’s got you this upset, it’s not stupid”

Pulling away from Carlos, Tk looks back down and spills everything that has been on his mind all day. What his father said, what happened at the minefield and how he found the bottle of wine in the bottom cupboard while making dinner.

Why Does It Always Happen To TK? (Tarlos)

Not hearing Matt Talking to him, Tk interrupts “Sorry Matt, but I really need to get back to my table my boyfriends waiting for me”. Looking a little shocked at matts closeness Tk took a step back. Realising the predicament he’s now in, Tk tried to look for any kind of escape. Watching everyone around them having a good time, TK realised he needed to sort this out by himself, so TK moved around Matt to walk away from him.

A Blast From The Past (Tarlos)

Tk’s vision slowly started to come back into focus and the words around him became clearer. Tk felt tired. It had been years since he had a panic attack that bad. New York, Tk’s mind registered. Remembering it slightly and realisation dawned on him as he slowly looked around at the crowd who had gathered, looking for the cause of his panic attack.

Well that was more than a sentence. But i couldn't just choose one line from each paragraph lol. hope you enjoyed these snippets and want to read more.

Tagging : @sapphire11,@chaotictarlos, @detective-giggles, @noxsoulmate, @tarlos-spain. @beautifulhigh.

[tenebrius-excellium]

I use fiction a lot too, but it’s not as much escapism and more…just learning? Kinda just walking a mile in someone else’s shoes and seeing where it might lead, so I don’t make the same mistakes. Spot the patterns and all. Though lately I’ve had to remind myself that ‘it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.’ Anyway. Hope you get through this chapter in your story and a happy ending! :) ~ Ceo

From this.

You know, this ask is so insanely intelligent to me that I wanted to keep it to myself for a while, and I’m going to answer under the cut.

Ceo, what you wrote there made me smile because it is a very INFJ thing to say. You should know that I have lived by this exact strategy for years. For all my life, even. I spotted someone or something I identified with, I followed that because of what it might have taught me about myself and others. The goal was to learn and understand for sure. I always used this to grow myself, and it used to be reliable, you know, a rock-solid source of stability for me to define my worldview. Analyzing patterns was my barometer of distinguishing right from wrong. 

However, I felt like a lot of shame came with this way of living, because literally no one around me was remotely doing the same or even understanding what I was talking about whenever I shared it. I felt like I had to over-explain myself to others constantly about the bold life choices I was making, and very rarely did I get affirmation or actual support. 

And then one day I crashed and I just couldn’t bear the public disgrace anymore. I blamed a certain failure on myself and my worldview, and thus became afraid and I caved. I chose the “safe” path over the bold path just to not lose face, and it’s been panic attacks for 4 years straight ever since. I lost myself in the deep end, friend. 

And now I’m too ashamed to look my younger self in the eyes and go back. The failure wasn’t mine, it was my parents’ who did not raise me so I could take care of myself properly. Still, it’s causing me a lot of shame to be clumsy and different from peers even as I’m healing, and I cannot forgive myself yet as I have broken my own code of conduct about always staying true to myself. I can’t return to my younger version because I violated her standards. She is rightfully judging me right now lol. Even though I’m older, I feel stupid and I can’t turn back time. Also, isn’t everything I do basically ‘being true to myself’ and my current beliefs? Including the desire to not be shunned and humiliated for what I do any longer?

Anyway, in addition, a few things have happened.

a) I am radically changing right now and satisfied with it. There’s a certain peace in a nonsensical, nihilistic way of thinking too. I don’t know if I would have made these specific healthy changes to my life if I hadn’t given up on my previous mindset first. I got angrier in a good way. I’m afraid of what might have happened, had I not become angrier. I set boundaries, that’s something.

b) In the end, Hiccup and Toothless chose the safe & easy path as well. They caved too. They compromised on their dreams and on their best friend. Heck, building a dragon-human utopia didn’t even seem to be on Toothless’ list of agenda at all. It always just seemed to be Hiccup’s vision, with his puppy dog happily and distractedly tagging along (see “Dean Deblois doesn’t understand dragons”). The point being that the director made one of the most important characters of my life, who basically equals a parental substitute, *give up* under the disguise of ‘growing up’. The point further being that there are not a lot of inspirational stories out there about people picking up their fire & spirit again in their twenties or thirties. If you haven’t reached your dreams by 22 or have otherwise experienced a setback, the media tell you you’re done for. There’s no picking up the pieces and starting over again. Although I know this is not true, it’s honestly hard to lose a huge source of strength like that. I’m too tired to get up, and I don’t care about it anymore. Right now, at least.

c) Neither of the two approaches towards life has guaranteed me a stable and gratifying source of income so far. Ironic. And very interesting.

So yeah, that’s about where I’m at right now. I’m okay. I’m not as passionate anymore, which I grieve very much. But I’ve started properly addressing some events of the past that have immensely violated my identity and my personal boundaries & needs, so that’s good. It’s all still a work in progress, so yes, I’m improving. I’m fine. Just... still poking around in / sorting through the soot.

If you read all the way through this and still have come encouragement on your mind, please don’t hesitate to throw it at me! I get a feeling it’s gonna be really helpful coming from you. Thanks for asking, and for reading!

How are you right now?

Much love

Reddie

[purlturtle]

From the weirdly specific and unrelated asks to know someone well: 2, 5, 12, 14, 15, 17, 28!

Hi Anon, and thanks for the ask!

I kinda feel like I already answered re: thoughts on veganism/question #2, but I'll do it again: I'm not vegan, probably never will be vegan, don't think that our environmental problems will be solved by universal veganism. I think it's important to be aware where your food comes from and how it is produced, including how the animals are treated in case of animal sourced foods. But veganism isn't the be all and end all. There's also a intersection of veganism (as an actual -ism) with colonialism and racism that I'm somewhat aware of but in no way knowledgeable enough to speak on.

5. Favorite form of potato: Reibekuchen/Kartoffelpuffer

(ID: a plate of potato fritters, served with apple sauce.)

I love plenty of potato dishes, and I think that Bratkartoffeln (pan fried sliced potatoes) are a FANTASTIC gauge for how good a restaurant is (as in, if they get them right, chances are high that the chef knows what they're doing). But if I have to name ONE potato form, it's Rievkooche (this is approximately how they're spelled in Cologne). They also stink up the kitchen a lot, so I rarely ever make them myself; they're pretty much only a Christmas market food.

12. Brand of haircare/skincare/bodycare I trust 100% - alverde, a store brand of the drugstore chain "dm", which operates in Germany and neighboring countries. Not sure how much help this is, but there you have it.

14: do you think you're dehydrated? Yes and no. Do I drink 2 liters of water a day? Heck no. Barely one. Am I dehydrated? Not according to my body: my skin is supple, my blood pressure perfect, my digestion works, my kidneys are happy as far as my doctor tells me. So. I think that 2 liters number is more of a bargaining/manipulation measure: if we (doctors/dieticians/nutritionists) tell them (other people) that high of a number, even if they won't drink quite that much, they'll probably drink more than they used to before, out of embarrassment. But I'm also a very big proponent of people knowing their own bodies best. Know what your body needs and what it's asking from you. Know how thirst feels (apparently something that can be unlearned). Take care of your body's needs, the way that works best for where you're at. This is also an intersectional issue, with classism, racism (especially in medicine), sexism (also especially in medicine), ableism, ... So yeah. I'll keep doing what works, until I get told or find out differently.

15. Rank the methods of death: freezing, burning, drowning - um, how? I've never... experienced any of them? I guess... I guess freezing is probably the "easiest", since from what I know (and that's all Hollywood, so don't @ me), you just go numb and indifferent and then you fall asleep and don't wake up? So yeah, that's probably what I'd prefer if I could choose. Downside of drowning: the panic when you can't get air. But probably doesn't last all that long? So maybe this would be second place? And burning, heck no. Ouch ouch ouch ouch! Please no. Too much agony for too long of a time before you pass out. I think.

17. An anxious compulsion you do every day. (Again I get the feeling I already answered that some time ago, but here goes:) none. I'm not an anxious person - I do have daily routines, and some of them stem from the wish to avoid negative consequences, such as brushing my teeth, but that's not anxiety. I *do* have covid anxiety in that I don't want to get it and thus have been avoiding group scenarios especially in inside spaces since the beginning, and do get anxiety attacks when I can't avoid those scenarios - but that's not a daily compulsion. So. None!

28. Last meal on Earth? No idea. Or rather, I love so many foodstuffs; it really depends on what I'm in the mood for. Or I could be clever and pick something that takes super long to prepare and/or eat, just to draw things out - but hey, maybe I'm an astronaut and this isn't about dying but just about heading out to a lifelong space journey. In any case it'll probably involve chocolate.

This was fun, thank you! 😁 I hope my answers were satisfying. Feel free to ask more!

[althedasworld]

Fear is odd.

Or at least the reactions we have to it.

Five days ago I found a tumor in my right breast.

Day before yesterday my doctor confirmed it was def there and set in motion the huge, ponderous and overly complex machinery that is the Danish healthcare system.

Yesterday I was contacted by my regional Hospital and notified that a time for a mammography screening was booked for today.

We have a shit ton of cancer in my family. Sooo much cancer of all kinds.

I was on birth control for three decades.

My point?

I'm at a very real risk of losing my right breast or even my life.

Apart from a 2 minute panic attack right after finding the tumor, my only reaction has been deciding not to tell my family until we know what is going to happen, (preferably until it's all fixed/we know I'm dying) since my mom's colon tumor is still being treated and she crumbles completely under any kind of stress (poor emotional regulation from childhood trauma and severe PTSD will do that).

I'm dissociating like crazy and this post has been my first real attempt at actually looking at my own emotional state and at putting words to what I am feeling.

How do I personally cope with fear?

The panic attack consisted of a deep dread and helplessness resulting in a few tears and a feeling of choking.

Got a hug from hubby who offered a slew of things to help - taking care of any and all chores for the foreseeable future, dropping any and all work to just hang out or cuddle, listen while I vent, researching and summarising the heck out of breast cancer and what to expect etc - he's amazing like that.

I chose to send him off to his conference call and just... Dive into a book. Then eat some chocolate and play a cozy non-challenging game I've been into lately.

.. And its dawned on me that I'm as crap as my mother at this stuff.

I don't know how to feel fear. I hide.

I dissociate at any and all uncomfortable emotions, hoping they'll go away if I'm numb for long enough. No wonder I'm as messed up as I am.

It shouldn't really be a surprise, no one modelled healthy emotional coping strategies to me in my childhood and I've actually met horrifyingly few in possession of them (husband being one of them).

I'm not sure how I was supposed to have acquired any.

What little I have was hard earned through over a decade of therapy and introspection. I really thought I was healthier than this.

Trying to be present in myself right now is to deliberately dive into a churning, nauseous maelstrom of panic and grief; I'm not able to handle it for more than a few seconds at a time, and I'm completely exhausted all the time no matter if I make the effort or not.

When I dissociate, hide, swallow it all and ignore it, I'm left with a low, constant unease. A pain in my throat and sternum as my vagus nerve clamors for attention.

How do people cope with fear like this? How am I supposed to react?

I honestly don't know. I'd really really like to.

[chloeafrazier]

Singleness is A Gift.

Hey Everyone now i am going to be Discussing a Topic that is very near and Dear to my Heart i want to Talk about Singleness Now i know that Singleness is

 hard and i don t want to Minimize the pain that some of you may be Going Through right now that is not what this Blog post is about now i know that some

 people may  read this and say she just talking about it for the heck of it or she is just posting to post about it but i can promise you that that is so not the

 reason why i am talking about this right now i am talking about this because i i have a lot strong feelings about it and because i don t like it when i see Single

 people seeing or thinking or talking about themselves as if they are Less then or that are still single because there good Enough or Pretty Enough or smart

 Enough or anything like that because that is not true you see you are a Child of the Most High God That is Never Gonna change if your Married or Single

 you will always be Gods Daughter or Gods son that fact will never Change  Trust me if your Married or Single God Loves you Just the same and yes

 marriage is a Gift from God but so is Singleness don t let anyone tell you any different because as a Single person Myself i felt almost as if me Being Single

 was a sin or something like that and if you feel that way i want to tell you that that is so not true like at all when i was 15 years old i was told that i had to get

 married by the time i was 21 years old or i would not go to Heaven and that God would stop Loving me if i was not Married by that time and i stood up and i

 walked to the Bathroom of the Church and i had my First Panic attack in my life and it took me years to know that the fact of me being Single was not and is

 not a sin and God can and dose Love and care for me and that i can and will still Go to Heaven even if i am not Married and i want you to know that so you

 don t have to hear and know the same pain that i want Through you as a single Person Matter you as a single person get to have Choices you don t to

 ask anyone where are we Gonna go eat Tonight ? you can go eat whatever you want as a single person you can Turn on Music you can get up when you

 want to you go to bed when you want to you can Pray out Loud you can Read your Bible you can watch a Movie you can Get up when you want to you can

 Go to bed when you want to you get to have those kinds of cool and Fun Choices and that is a Blessing from God and you Dig Deep into the Things of

 God you can read the bible listen to Music and Listen to Encouraging Podcast and read things out Loud you can dance to the Music that you play no matter

 how late  it is and that is More Good and Cool Things that you can do that is cool for sure know that you Being single is not a bad thing and it is not a sin

 Either No Matter what anyone says you are and can be and should be Loved by God even if you are Single you are Loved and cared for by God No Matter

 what anyone says Singleness is a Gift Just Like Marriage again don t let anyone tell you any Different you are Loved and wanted and cared for always Thanks for reading Have a great day . 

[the-nymphvallien-universe]

The Hospital

Alright now we're done with all the setup and Day 7 stuff, we get to move on to post Flickering Out. The journal entries from here on out get darker, so I figure I should probably start giving content warnings on them. So ah,

TW: hospital, needles, injury

I dunno if that's good enough. I guess if you want something tagged let me know. This entry doesn't have a scan either. I did write a majority of these on notepaper but this one was just in my normal handwriting so I didn't bother scanning it.

The first question I asked them when I woke up was “Is she okay?” Not “where am I?” Not “what happened? How did I get here?” Not even “what the heck is this big needle doing in my arm?” Those questions would come later, along with their subsequent answers.

I’m at Kaeyo Orange County Hospital. That probably doesn’t mean much to you— basically, a long way from where I was before. I knew this already. “Where am I?” was mostly a reflex to waking up in a bed I didn’t fall asleep in.

According to them, I burst through the ER doors with her draped over my shoulders, struggling to walk, gasping for breath, shirt deeply stained with blood. I wouldn’t let them touch me until they had taken her first. I fainted as soon as she went out of sight.

It... it almost sounded heroic when they put it that way. I’m not a hero, I just... I just... I’m not a hero.

Oh? And that needle? An IV. I probably asked that one on reflex too. Who knows, could’ve been morphine. I wish it was morphine...

Between getting shot and having my flesh torn by an interdimensional Tiansei whose only goal is to kill everything, I’d choose getting shot. Everytime. Though maybe that’s because I didn’t have to deal with any long term consequences of being shot.

The doctor said it got me pretty good. But they stitched me all back up again and I’ll be able to go “home” soon (Home being relative. I think the embassy’s set us up with some apartment in the city. How nice of them).

I don’t believe them.

I mean, I do. I’ve seen the scars, they’re horrible. I don’t know if it’s some demon magic thing, or a post-traumatic stress thing, or if I’m just having panic attacks. But I swear, sometimes it feels like there’s a burning hot knife slicing through the scars. I’m not sure which explanation is worst. A few days was an awfully optimistic view.

You may have noticed I haven’t said if she’s okay or not. That’s because I don’t know. They won’t tell me. They say they don’t want to cause me stress. Stress will only hinder my recovery. I don’t think they realise how stressed that answer is making me.

Date: undated, likely late 2021

Note: I am fully aware that an IV is not a needle. I'd like to say the Watsonian explanation is that Sonwy doesn't know it's not a needle, but when I was at a hospital I was told many times that an IV is not a needle and I imagine he would be told that too, many times, every time he referred to it as such. The working explanation is that he just doesn't care. I sure as hell didn't care, why do you think I had to be told multiple times. Ah, I'm talking too much again. Signing off-

[miraculous-trinity-leo]

Whacky Gotham, Goofy New York, and Chaotic Paris.

(part 1) (part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

Chapter 1: Genius Little Ladybug

★—–—–†–—–—★

It all started when Sabine Cheng and her parents moved from China to America, where she met a rich boy named Tony, they weren't the best of friends at first, but they would always get into crazy shenanigans because of Tony. Sabine always finding a way to get them out of it. After a while they were practically inseparable, they had each others backs, both in the good times, and the bad.

So when Tony lost both his mother and father in a tragic car accident, and had to take over his parents company, she was there to try and ease the pain. It helped a little, but the boy changed and blocked out many people, only keeping a select few close to him. His personality changed, and he started to act differently, it saddened Sabine, but she knew it was his way of coping with his lose.

She would oftentimes find him crying silently in his office. When Tony opened a branch in Paris France, he was paranoid something would go wrong when he wasn't there, so he had Sabine become a sort of co-CEO for the Paris branch. Over the many years of her being a sibling-in-everything-but-blood to Tony, her intelligence was much higher than everyone in the company, other than said boy.

She moved to Paris not long after, always keeping an eye on both the Paris branch and Tony ( because god knows what would happen if she didn't do so). She even met a baker named Tom Dupain. Eventually dating, and marrying him. Tony wasn't the most eager when he heard of Tom, but he accepted him as family (not because if he didn't Sabine would knock some sense into him). He practically exploded with excitement when he heard we would be an uncle a few years after Sabine's wedding.

Tony was there in the waiting room with Tom, when Sabine was having the child ( Tony denies not having a mini heart attack when the nurse came in). Both men looked at the beautiful child through the glass. Tony was put to tears when he read her name "Maria Dupain-Cheng" and was comforted by a teary Tom.

When Maria was 9 months old, her Uncle Tony came to spend time with her, and talk business with Sabine. None of them expected Maria to crawl her way into their conversation and say "Uncle Tony" in the sweetest most adorable laugh both adults had ever heard. Tony had a massive grin on his face, and gave Maria a big hug and lots of kisses saying " I knew i was your favorite hahaha, and you're only 9 months old. Sabine I think we got a little genius on our hands." Sabine was just as happy and told Tom to hurry and grab the camera.

"Come on say it one more time my dear Maria, show your papa who your favorite adult is" Tony said with a very wide grin.

Maria giggled at her uncle's happiness, clapping her hands. "Uncle Tony, Uncle Tony" Tom just smiled giving his baby girl a kiss and handing Tony 10 Euros.

Tony continued to visit his little genius niece over the years. Maria ended up getting the best education a kid could get, becuase his logic was " If she is a genius (which she is) then she is going to have the best education money can buy, for nothing is to much for my Little Genius Maria!" and with that she could officially be called the smartest kid in all of Paris... heck probably in all of Europe even! So when she gained a passion for fashion at 4, Tony didn't hesitate to get her, her very first (kid friendly) sewing set. By the time Maria was 5 she already knew how to speak and write in French, English, Spanish, Russian, and is learning Mandarin.

Maria had met Chloé when they were both 6, although they weren't really friends, they were polite to each other, which surprised a lot of the other kids their age. She had met Alix a few months later. She spent a lot of the time she wasn't studying with her friends, Alix would get in trouble with another kid on the playground, Chloé would criticise the other kid, and Maria would talk to Alix and then apologize to the other kid. Overall, they had a good dynamic going on, and they (as 7 year olds) promised to always have each others backs to the very end.

When Maria was 3½ months away from her 9th birthday, Tony was kidnapped. Maria just broke down, she wanted to help her Uncle, but she didn't know where he was or how she could help if she did. For three months Maria would only speak to Chloé and Alix (they were kinda shocked to find out she was related to THE Tony Stark). A few days before her birthday, Tony came to their home, with rolls of fabric, flowers, and 'I'm sorry cards'. Maria jumped into his arms crying asking what happened, and "If you're the smartest man on the Earth, why the Heck did it take you so long? How did you get out? Are any of your vital organs hurts? Do you need to go to the Hospital? An-"

"Hey slow down My Little Genius Maria, I'm ok. 1, They didn't really give me much to work with at first, and there is only so much a genius like myself can do with so little resources, and time before your Birthday. 2, I made an anime mecha suit and flew out guns a blazing. 3, Nothing I can't live without. and 4, No because I'm spending the week with you lot before a conference I have in about 10 days." He said while holding his small little genius  in his arms.

Wiping away the tears she looked her Uncle in the eyes "Wait, you 'made an anime mecha suit and flew out guns a blazing?' How does it work? what's its power source? And why do you have a weird glowing device in your chest?!" He had a lot of explaining to do.

That week, in her words was 'The best week of her life.' She was really happy for the first time since the Tony-napping happened, although she was sad he had to go, she knew  he was safe, and that she didn't have to worry (as much) now.

When Maria was 13, both Tony and Sabine decided to have her go to public school with her friends. After hearing this Maria called for a meeting, her two commanders (Alix and Chloé) came for the meeting, and had a talk on how she should go about her first day of public school, asking questions like 'How do non-homeschooled kids act? What are their personalities like? What interests do they have? Are some barbaric like Alix is sometimes? Will they like me? Am I allowed to talk to Chloé in or only out of class? What are the seating arrangements? Who do I sit next to?' the list goes on. They were all excited to finally all be in the same study environment, now all they had to do was wait for their first day.

•~—~—~—~—~—~—~•

The night before her first day Maria may or may not have slept well due to her excitement, she woke up a little later than she ever would have preferred, getting breakfast, her clothes, the 'greeting sweets' (as Alix called them) and heading out in a slight panic.

On her way out she noticed an elderly man with a cain crossing the street, and a car coming a little faster than what was allowed, she pulled the man out of the cars way without losing any of the sweets, after making sure the man was ok, she gave him a sweet before saying good day and heading over to school. She never noticed the man walking away without the use of his cain.

She still got to class on time, when her teacher walked in she greeted everyone in the class "Bonjour, je m'appelle Maria Dupain-Cheng, c'est un plaisir de vous rencontrer! (Hello, my name in Maria Dupain-Cheng, it is a pleasure to meet you!)" after the introductions she sat down in the empty seat next to Alix, both giving a fist bump, and a smile to Chloé, who looked away as if she didn't care (the girl had an image to keep after all). When class was over she handed out the sweets and went with her friends to lunch. During lunch, one of the other students from a different class was mocking one of their classmates that Maria remembered as Ivan, for having a crush on Mylène and not saying how he really feels to her. Ivan ran off into one of the locker rooms, and Maria decided to go and comfort him, she explained that she overheard what happened and that he should try and tell Mylène about his feelings, listing many different things he could do or say, and that he should stay positive.

Ivan thanked Maria afterwards and went off to write a song for Mylène. Ivan later showed Mylène the song he wrote for her, but was teased by other students near them, Ivan ran away not wanting to be embarrassed more.

Back in the classroom Alix and Maria are sitting and talking when everyone hears crashing and screams outside, the class looked out to see a giant rock thing destroying everything  on its way to the school. The teachers sent the kids home in an attempt to keep them safe.

When Maria got home she noticed a small box with writing she didn't recognize, she carefully opened it, instantly releasing a glow of bright red-ish pink light.

"Greetings Maria Dupain-Cheng, I am Tikki, the Ladybug Kwami of creation and good Luck, it is a pleasure to meet you." Maria couldn't believe her eyes "Mon dieu..." was all she could say, before going full interrogation mode "You're a Kwami? What is that? How are you floating like that? How am I able to understand you? Do you have some sort of ability to communicate in any language?How did you fit in this box? w-"

"There is no time, Paris needs you! I can only explain the powers I grant and how to use them, so please listen carefully."

•~—~—~—~—~—~—~•

Soon Maria was running in a red suit with black spots and amor. She ended up facing the 'akuma' as Tikki called it in a stadium, meeting her partner (a blonde furry she decided) for the first time.

"Bonjour m'lady, so what's the plan to take this thing down?"

Without hesitation she explained her plan " The plan is for you to have your Cataclysm ready, I'll give you a signal when it's your-"

"Cataclysm!"  The boy proceeded to use his ONE attack on a GOAL POST!

"I said to wait for a SIGNAL! Now you only have five minutes before you power-off."

"Oops" The blonde was really wasting her more useful braincells. After the boy was thrown out of the stadium, Maria was left to fend for herself, and she did really well, considering this was her first non(but sort of) official villain fight, up until she lost her footing and was knocked into the side of the stadium. The akuma was gone before she could get back, more and more people were turned to stone, but it showed just where Stoneheart was heading.

She arrived at the Eiffel Tower, where blonde was fighting stone people, he just managed to get away and actually listened to the plan this time.

They defeated Stoneheart, Maria gave her speech to the villain, and did a fist bump (though at this point Maria just wanted to get some sleep), when a reporter came to interview them.

"What are your names, and where did you come from?"

"My name's Chat Noir an-"

"Ladybug, and we're hear to protect Paris from Moth-Man, as much as we would love to give you a bit more details, we don't have much time at the moment" right on que their Miraculous' beeped signalling they had 2 minutes left " Stay safe, and positive, Bug-Out. "

•~—~—~—~—~—~—~•

"Well done Maria!"

"Thanks Tikki." and with that Maria went downstairs to get something to eat, when she saw her parents watching the news.

"Earlier today Paris gained a villain and two heroes: Ladybug, and Chat Noir. Many of our viewers submitted pictures and videos, but only one of Ladybug came out clear."

"Thank you Ladybug and Chat Noir for protecting us, bonne journée à Paris."

.................

"Maria you're taking self-defense classes starting tomorrow" Sabine spoke, though Maria didn't have any complaints, plus it'll help when fighting akumas so it's a win win.

"Yes maman."

•~~~~~later in Maria's room~~~~~•

"Ok, so you're basically goddess of creation personified into a cute little Ladybug creature?"

"Kwami, but yes."

"And you've existed since basically the Big Bang?"

"Correct."

"... how are you able to float like that? How are we able to talk without any ancient god language in the way? And what other kinds of um kwamis are there?"

"I float with magic. Yes their is a language only for the Kwami, but we've learned every other language in existence, so there would never be an issue with communication. And to your last question, there are many different kinds of Miraculi all over the world, some even across the universe, so I am unable to list every single one in existence, but there are just as many Miraculi out there as there are starts in the sky."

"Impressive... does that mean I could learn magic?"

"As a human you are limited to what you can do with magic, but you have a strong creation soul. So yes it is possible for you to learn basic magic, I can teach you some life magic to help you heal quicker if you get hurt outside the suit. You can also learn other types of basic magic based on what Miraculous you are most aligned to. Surprisingly you have a close affinity to most of my brothers and sisters that are here in Paris."

"Are they in the hands of other Miraculous users?"

"... aside from Chat Noir, only two: one belongs to the Guardian, and the other to Hawkmoth."

"What are their names?"

"...Wayzz is Kwami of Protection, and is the partner of the Guardian. The other is Nooroo Kwami of Transmission, Hawkmoths Kwami.

"Ok, so then I assume the 'Guardian' is who you were with until now, right?"

"That is correct."

"And how was I chosen exactly?"

"The Guardian chose you because he saw your kindness in action, and sensed your strong Creation Soul, he has only ever been wrong once, but I can tell you will be a great Ladybug, maybe even one of the few who achieved a higher sence of life."

"... I feel like you kind of described a Sage, also how would he have seen an act of kindness, I mean, I got my things, went out helped an older man with a cain, wait."Maria squinted her eyes at Tikki as if looking for something.

"The elderly man's the Guardian isn't he?"

"..."

"I get it, you don't have to tell me, it's all apart of the 'plot' like some show, I get it. Welp, good night Tikki, have to get up early tomorrow."

"Good night Maria." Tikki never messed up so badly before, then again she never had a user with such a strong Creation Soul before either... Maria is something special.

•~—~—~—~—~—~—~•

And Tikki was right, she excelled at Life Magic, learning a fair bit of healing, luck and slight plant manipulation and communication magic. Tikki wasn't sure if she should be proud of her Bug, or scared at her fast learning skills.

A few weeks passed and Maria was thankful for the self-defense classes, she even started doing her own training routine with Tikki guiding her. She didn't like that her partner was a flirt, it got distracting and almost got Chat killed a few times. She often wondered 'what the hell did I do in my past life to get a partner like this?'

•~—~—~—~—~—~—~•

Tony Stark was called by Sabine to meet her earlier than they had planned, she informed him that Paris now has a villain and two heroes.

"Ok, so what's the problem? We agreed to put Maria in self-defense classes so she would be safe... is it a boy?! Don't tell me it's a boy, she's to young to be dating!"

"It's not about a boy."

"Then what is this about?"

"She's Ladybug, *sigh* I swear she gets it from you Tony. She learned it from your dumb@ss, and it didn't help the need to protect people she loves when you got kidnapped. I need you to teach her how to be a good hero, good combat strategist, and to give her your support. She already has a tactical mind, I'm proud in a way that she shares your bravery."

"Ffffffffudge... ok, where is she?"

"Upstairs."

•~—~—~—~—~—~—~•

After a slightly awkward conversation Maria started to get even more training, and became a pretty much badass on the field, she incorporated the known fighting styles of: Black Widow (her favorite hero), Captain America, Deadpool (favorite hero to some degree), Daredevil, Wolverine, and some moves from famous villains like, Kraven The Hunter, Red Skull, Doctor Doom, Scorpion, Shocker, and Taskmaster ( her favorite villain). And she used ALL of those skills in battle, it was damn impressive to watch, and then Sabine had a talk with Tony.

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜Bonus〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

"Ok Tony wtf? I asked you to teach her how to fight for protection when she's out there, But you turned her into a complete badass, I mean none of the akumas have lasted more than 10 minutes with her! I want to hug you and kick your @ss at the same time."

" Sorry not sorry Sabine, but she is our Genius Little Ladybug after all."

•—–—–†–—–—•

First fic, wahoo (mario stile), hope you're all having an Absolutely wonderful day, stay safe, and stay positive, BUG-OUT!🐞💮🐞

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜 Tag List 〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

1st place★: @animegirlweeb ☕

2nd place★: @jumpingjoy82

3rd place★: @zalladane

4th place★: @jayjayspixiepop

5th place★: @arty-shadow-morningstar

6th place★: @smol-book-nerd

7th place★: @irontimetravelflower

8th place★: @fandom-trapped-03

9th place★: @meme991001

10th place★: @buginetye

11th place★: @blackroserelina

12th place★: @jessigurl-design

13th place★: @adrestar

14th place★: @moon5608

15th place★: @little-bluestar

16th place★: @batgirljr72

17th place★: @myazael

18th place★: @our-preciousss

19th place★: @wolf2118

20th place★: @nyx-in-line

21st place★: @kking13

22nd place★: @lunerlover2024

23rd place★: @moonlightstar64

24th place★: @corporeal-terrestrial

25th place★: @kashlyn

26th place★: @tbehartoo

27th place★: @heart-charming

28th place★: @solangelo252

29th place★: @t1dwarrior-of-earth

30th Place★: @lady-phoenix-of-tardis

@lupagrimm

[parkkrys]

This Wasn't Supposed to Happen

For @outro-intoit who requested this prompt that grew a bit bigger then expected haha

WARNING: features temporary amnesia and mpreg but it is not a/b/o

This is long so, to see it on a03 you can find the link here

It will also be featured down below :) All grammar mistakes are my own

--------------------------------------------

Stiles didn’t hide this on purpose, there just wasn’t a good time to tell him. Doing this friends with benefits thing with an alpha werewolf maybe wasn’t the best idea but how could he ever say no to Derek?

Sure, he had feelings for the man, and this could only end in heartbreak because hey, who would be interested in a long time thing with him of all people? He knew how annoying he could be. He wasn’t even sure how his dad had put up with him all these years.

But this has gone on for far too long, the scent blocker and the bracelet that he has been wearing for the past month could only do so much from hiding his not so little secret. Stiles may have or may not have freaked out when a couple of weeks ago he had woken up feeling sick, rushing to the washroom several times in the morning while his lower back started to ache and he was just so tired all the time.

The exhaustion he was used to, but after it happening over and over again he had to drag himself to Deaton to make sure it wasn’t a freaky supernatural thing first before going to Melissa to get checked out. He had only stared at Deaton when Deaton had only told him the news that it was in fact a supernatural event.

“But I am a boy and boys can’t get pregnant doc,” Was the first thing he blurted out and Deaton only gave him a look before he muttered two words.

“Alpha werewolf Stiles.”

Okay maybe it was three words, but Stiles was freaking out. He was pregnant, knocked up, bun in the oven and he had no idea how the hell it happened. Deaton had only seemed like he wanted to be anywhere but there and Stiles was on the verge of a panic attack and it just was not a great time for either of them.

So Deaton gave him a bracelet to hide the baby’s heartbeat and the scent of pregnancy since that was also going to be a problem according to Deaton, because he sure as hell wasn’t ready to tell Derek. Deaton had respected that and had helped him and really, he owed the doc a lot for that.

But now he was starting to show and he knew maybe he shouldn’t put this off any longer unless he wanted Derek to feel like he wasn’t good enough. Knowing the werewolf he would think that anyway and Stiles wasn’t sure what the heck he was going to do. So, today was the day he thought to himself as he wrapped himself up in layers and set off towards Derek’s loft.

If he sat outside for longer than necessary no one needed to know that.

But his plan didn’t exactly go to plan.

“What the hell happened to you guys?” Stiles blurted as he took in the werewolves that only groaned in his direction.

“Don’t worry, we had it all handled,” Scott told him and Stiles only stomped down the feeling of betrayal of not being included. He was pack wasn’t he? Sometimes he didn’t feel like it even if Derek told him he was.

“Not really,” Erica said, “We do have one problem.”

“Which is?” Stiles asked and he noticed how all of them didn’t want to look him in the eye before Derek walked into the living room and Stiles immediately felt relieved that he was okay, “Derek! What are your puppies not telling me?”

“Who are you?” Derek asked and Stiles froze. Okay, what?

“Okay that’s a new one from you, playing the I don’t know you card. Hurtful Derek but okay. Just answer the damn question or I will shave off your caterpillars.”

Derek only looked at him with a glare that he hasn’t seen since they first met and wow okay, Stiles was actually starting to get worried.

“Stiles, don’t-” Scott started to warn before Stiles found himself slammed into the wall, his head smacking hard onto the brick wall as he grunted. He distantly heard growling a little too close for comfort before the weight was pulled off of him.

“Derek that is enough!”

“Stop it!”

Stiles slid to the ground, his arms immediately going to his stomach before he finally looked up to see Isaac and Boyd struggling to push Derek back. The others were shouting words at him and Stiles winced as he rubbed the back of his head, that one was going to hurt.

“Derek lost his memory Stiles, we had to re-introduce ourselves and tell him we were pack,” Lydia told him as she helped him up and Stiles wasn’t sure what to think. He was going to tell him about their child. But he couldn't tell him with his memory gone.

“He isn’t pack!” Derek roared and Stiles felt like someone had slapped him.

“He is pack Derek, he is the only human to be part of our pack! So you will treat him like he is your pack member.”

Stiles had to remind himself that this wasn’t Derek, this was Derek who doesn’t remember him. Yeah, it stung but he had to try and push it to the side. Derek seemed to calm down from being all wolfed out to just staring at him in bewilderment and Stiles only groaned as he pushed himself away from the wall, which was definitely going to leave a big bruise.

“Wow you really weren’t kidding were you?” Stiles asked and the others only shook their heads. Well, there goes his plan to tell Derek. Just his luck.

“So, how exactly did grumpy over there lose his memory?” Stiles asked and the others winced as they looked at one another.

“May or may have not been a witch,” Scott mumbled and Stiles glared. How many times has he told his puppies to not play around with witches?

“You dealt with a witch, without me. See, this is what happens when you do things without me!”

“You have been off lately, we thought that you were tired and needed a break!”

“What?”

“You have been moody and I think everyone can see how tired you are Stiles,” Erica said softly and Stiles couldn’t help but to feel touched. So that was why they didn’t include him.

“Look, I know I have been kinda all over the place lately but this was still a witch. Did she say it was a curse or is it a spell that will wear off?”

“No freaking clue,” Isaac shrugged and Stiles felt his eye twitch.

“Did she say words when she flew magic at him?”

“Something about punishment?” Scott said and Stiles sighed.

“Then it will probably wear off, take him to Deaton first.”

Everyone nodded and Derek frowned. Stiles knew he was going to say something stupid or ask questions, it was inevitable at this point so he didn’t bother to tell the damn wolf not too. He knew the others expected him to make the most of this time to fuck around with Derek but he needed the wolf to be as normal as fast as possible.

He needed to know if Derek was going to turn him away or not, he couldn’t stand the thought process of his brain immediately going to straight doom. He needed to know and he would deal with the outcome even if he didn’t want to because he fell in love with grumpy, prickly Derek Hale who had a soft heart but refused to show it to other people.

Probably because of all the bad times he did. Thank you Kate and Jennifer, for making his life difficult, if you weren’t dead before, Stiles would make sure they would be now.

“Are you my mate?” Derek asked and Stiles choked as the others stared.

“W-what?” Stiles managed out after coughing a bit. Derek was going to kill him one of these days.

“The others listen to you as if you are the alpha’s mate.”

“No, we aren’t,” Stiles told him, he wanted to be. But he didn’t deserve someone as beautiful as Derek. He was just, carrying his child instead, because that totally made sense.

Derek frowned deepened before Boyd grabbed his arm and dragged him off before he could ask anymore questions. Stiles wasn’t even sure how to feel when Scott laughed lightly before he smiled at Stiles.

“Can you imagine? You two never get along.”

Only if Scotty knew.

“Look, just call me when he gets his memories back okay? It’s creepy and depressing that he barely remembers anything.”

“You sure you're okay?” Scott asked and Stiles nodded as he hugged his best friend.

“Yeah, just tired. I’m always tired these days.”

“If you need anyone to talk to, I’m here okay?”

Stiles smiled, “Yeah I know Scott.”

Scott nodded, satisfied with his answer before he left and Stiles sighed as he looked around the loft. Well, this got complicated and the only thing he could think of that would make sure the others didn’t know until Derek got his memory back was to stay away.

Anyway, he needed to have an awkward conversation with his dad. He was not looking forward to that at all.

“You’re pregnant,” HIs dad repeated and Stiles nodded slowly. It was a smart move to tell his dad to sit down because his dad grew pale as he stared at the table in disbelief. They sat in silence for a bit before his dad cleared his throat.

“This isn’t a joke right? Like, you aren’t punishing me for something are you?”

“What? Dad no! Why would I make this up?” Stiles spluttered and his dad only nodded slowly.

“Right….. Supernatural?”

“Pretty much yeah.”

His dad seemed to accept that as an answer but Stiles feared for what the next question was.

“And the father? Someone I know?”

Dammit, he should have known better then to think his dad would let it go, “Yep.”

“And who is it?”

“Promise not to shoot him?”

HIs dad glared, “Depending.”

“Well, that's the best I am gonna get I suppose then,” Stiles muttered before he took a deep breath, “It’s ua, it’s Derek.”

“As in Hale, Derek Hale?”

Shit, his father was furious. He panicked as Noah placed his hands on the table, about to stand up when Stiles blurted it out.

“He doesn’t even remember okay!? He doesn’t remember who anyone is anyway.”

That made his father pause, “What do you mean he doesn’t remember?”

“Just sit down dammit, I am already stressed out as it is and I swear I am gonna pass out if I have to deal with anymore bullshit.”

His father now only looked more worried as he got up and moved around the table, pulling Stiles into his arms and Stiles wanted to cry, he was barely holding back the tears when his dad pulled away but still kept contact.

“Tell me what’s happening kid.”

“The pack,” Stiles started before he swallowed, his eyes were burning but he was determined to get through this, “They went to deal with a witch by themselves like the idiots they are and,” Stiles had to stop to sniffle as a tear made its way down his cheek, “And Derek got hit by a spell that made him forget everything and I don’t even know how he is going to react or if he even wants it.”

His dad only frowned as he brushed the tears away, “What do you mean if he even wants it?”

“We aren’t in a relationship dad, it was kind of a,” He hesitated and his dad raised a brow.

“Spur of a moment thing?”

Stiles only hiccupped softly as he nodded and Noah only held him close again and Stiles felt like he was that little boy again who would always curl up in his dad’s lap whenever he was upset.

“I don’t even know if he wants me dad,” Stiles managed to choke out as he trembled in his dad’s arms and his dad only held him tighter.

“We are going to get through this kid, if he doesn’t see how amazing you are then he doesn’t know what he’s missing.”

He knew his dad was furious, Stiles didn’t blame him but Stiles believed his dad. No matter what, they were going to go through this and they will figure it all out like they always had done before in the past.

“I got you kid, I got you.”

And Stiles finally let himself cry as he broke apart in his dad's arms.

He had been exhausted, bone deep tired as he laid down in his bed and pulled the covers up and over his head as he just laid there in the dark. It had been about a week since his breakdown in his dad’s arms. A week since Derek lost his memory, a week before he really had the energy to figure anything out or plan about what would happen when Derek would get his memories back.

Deaton had confirmed it was only temporary, he didn’t know how long it would last, but it wasn’t going to be forever.

Stiles sighed as his hands drifted to the small baby bump that was growing a little bit every day. He was so scared about the what if’s and his dad had tried to keep him out of his own mind but Stiles couldn’t help but to jump to the worst case scenarios. The pack still didn’t know either, it felt wrong to tell them before Derek.

He had known he had feelings when Derek and he had first started the arrangement, knew it was only going to end in heartbreak but he had figured if this was the only way he would get the wolf then it would be worth it. Now he wondered if it was.

He groaned as he rolled over to his other side, it was done, he couldn’t change the past even if he really wanted to. He just had to suffer the consequences and he could already tell that this child was going to be the light of his life. He wasn’t going to give them up no matter what. He couldn’t care less about the gender of his baby, he was going to love them with everything he had dammit.

And if he was kicked out of the pack, if Derek didn’t want them…. Well he would still make sure this child would never feel lonely.

Even if it meant he would be.

Stiles sighed as he screwed his eyes shut, the hormones were really getting to him and he swore he felt like he was going to either scream or cry even more. His father had been trying to handle his mood swings but Stiles couldn’t even predict how he would react to anything now. It drove him insane.

He hadn’t really spoke to the pack since the night at Derek’s loft. They haven’t even reached out to him, have been saying he was tired, he looked exhausted every time they saw him and wanted to let him rest. He didn’t realize that meant they were not going to be there for him and made everything feel normal.

Instead it only made him feel even more alone. He knew all he had to do was yell at them but if he was part of the pack why was it necessary for him to do it in the first place to get some attention? That isn’t how it worked and high school was pretty much the same thing. Thank god he had graduated last year and was trying to figure himself out.

The pack all agreed to taking a year off to sort through things before they all tried their hand at college. HIs dad wasn’t impressed but considering now, his father was probably also relieved that they had made the decision. He didn’t know what he would do if he had to figure out school while being pregnant. Probably have a complete breakdown.

He heard his phone buzz but he just mostly ignored it, he couldn’t find the motivation or the will to even move quite yet. Sleep wasn’t coming to him easily so he was trapped in his own mind again for the night as he rubbed his belly. He couldn’t wait until the day they would kick or even move. To feel their life under his hands.

“You done sulking yet?”

Stiles screamed as he shot up, actually literally having a near heart attack as he noticed how Derek was sitting on the window sill. God dammit he didn’t even hear the window open.

“What the fuck!! You fucking asshole!” Stiles screeched and Derek actually looked a little guilty.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Well you fucking did!” Stiles gasped as he placed a hand on his chest, trying to gain his breath back.

“Look, I wanted to apologize. I don’t remember anything and you haven’t been around.”

Stiles huffed as he pulled the blankets to cover his belly more as he shrugged. He wasn’t even sure what to even say at this point.

“And you smell sad and sweet and it has been driving me insane.”

“Sad and sweet?”

Derek glared, “Yes, you just smelled sad when I shoved you against the wall and now you smell sweet.”

Shit, Stiles wasn’t wearing the bracelet.

“And it’s hit in here yet you have blankets wrapped around you so I’m wondering if you are hiding something,” Derek also said and Stiles felt his eyes widen.

“I’m not hiding anything!”

“But you are, I don’t even have to be a werewolf to know you just lied.”

Stiles knew he was starting to panic and Derek only frowned before he moved closer and that made Stiles panic even more.

“Hey easy, the others said you can have panic attacks, breathe,” Derek said softly as he sat down on the edge of his bed, his hands coming up to grab his shoulders gently and Stiles hand’s shot up to grab his wrists. “If I had my memory I wouldn’t have noticed you were hiding something wouldn’t I?”

Stiles only wheezed as he nodded slightly, no he wouldn’t have. Derek actually looked a little upset at that piece of information and Stiles felt himself starting to calm down a bit as Derek placed their foreheads together.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s-” Stiles tried to say but his heartbeat was still beating too fast, he still felt shaky and he was so tired.

“I think I know what it is, the thing is I just don’t understand.”

Stiles frowned as he pulled away and he jumped when Derek moved the blankets away to place a hand on the bump with confusion in his eyes.

“We aren’t mates but I feel a pull to you, and you smelled like my mom did when she was pregnant with Cora,” Derek whispered and Stiles only broke more as he sniffled.

He didn’t even get to fully register he was crying before Derek pulled him into his arms, gently rubbing his back and Stiles, he wanted this. But Derek wasn’t Derek. He didn’t remember and Stiles couldn’t handle that fact.

“I’m sorry I don’t remember.”

“It’s not your fault,” Stiles managed to say between his cries and Derek only held him closer. There were no words spoken that night, Derek only held him and he didn’t move away even after Stiles managed to calm down. Derek only ran a hand through his hair and whispered to him to go to sleep so Stiles did. And he felt safe, he felt like he was home in his arms.

If this is all he got, that was okay. It had to be okay.

And when he woke up with Derek holding him, his face looking so peaceful, he wanted this even more and Stiles didn’t know what to do. But he was just going to leave it.

Derek ended up visiting even more since that night; he even respected Stiles' wish that he didn’t want the pack to know yet. Stiles seemed happier with Derek around; his dad even mentioned something about it.

It had been rough between the two men for a while, Noah wanted to shoot him while Derek didn’t even remember but felt guilty but it had settled. It made Stiles smile for the first time in over a week and that seemed to be the agreement between the two.

It had been peaceful and Stiles was wondering when the next shoe was going to drop. When it was all going to hell.

Stiles hummed as he slowly woke up, smiling as he felt Derek pressed along his back, his arm tucked around the small baby bump. It made his heart swell in fondness every time. He could tell that Derek was awake with the way the hand was rubbing small circles and he just let himself slowly drift along that line of sleep and half awake for a little bit more.

He felt warm and safe.

“You awake?” Derek asked softly and Stiles only hummed. He loved how soft and rough Derek’s voice could be in the mornings. It made a shiver travel down his back.

“I remember.”

And that woke Stiles up as he suddenly stopped breathing, his body tensing up as he felt Derek hold him tighter.

“Hey now, relax Stiles,” Derek rushed and Stiles only whimpered. How could he relax? This was the end of everything.

“Stiles, I am not upset, I remember everything before the witch and after the witch.”

“And?” Stiles choked out and Derek’s hand only circled his belly again.

“I remember how scared I was you know? To admit that I felt something for you despite you being in high school. You were so young but so full of life I almost wanted to envy you but how could I? You care about everyone, you see things that no one else does, you always told me I wasn’t a monster.”

“Excuse me you are not!” Stiles yelled as he moved, his fear forgotten for a bit as he glared at Derek and Derek only looked down at him fondly. It made Stiles freeze, he never had someone look at him like that before.

“Exactly, and you want to know something?”

Stiles could only nod.

“I remember falling in love with you all over again, I loved seeing you smile, how you laughed and I was so amazed because you shined so brightly. You took my breath away and you are carrying my child Stiles. You are amazing,” Derek whispered and Stiles sniffled as he threw himself at Derek, the wolf holding him close.

“I thought you wouldn’t want me,” Stiles cried and Derek hushed him softly.

“Of course I do, I wanted to for a long time, and if I could, I want you both,” Derek whispered as he pulled Stiles into his lap, his hand never leaving the baby bump and Stiles only cried even more.

“Of course you can you stupid wolf!”

Derek thankfully didn’t say anything because Stiles was fully lost in his emotions, and he really didn’t want to ruin the moment by trying to strangle the man if he said something completely stupid that he would deserve it for.

“It’s okay, I got you now and I am never letting you go, never.”

Stiles only buried his face into the wolf’s shoulder. He knew they still had a lot to talk about, his dad still had to be informed that Derek had his memories back. The pack still had to know about that and about the baby that Stiles was carrying because of Derek’s stupid alpha werewolf sperm.

But that can wait because Derek wanted him. He wanted him and the baby and he was so stupid happy about it.

“It’s gonna all be okay now Stiles.”

And Stiles believed him.

[storytellerofuntoldlegends]

somebody loves you for yourself

A/N: I have had this nicomas fic in my head and have been working on it basically since fwsa came out, and it’s finally done!! it’s like 7k of pure fluff and nico meeting the sides, enjoy! (title is from Wake Up, Sunshine by All Time Low)

Summary: On a relaxing date night with Thomas, Nico stumbles upon someone on the kitchen- someone who looked eerily like his boyfriend. Then he ends up meeting five more "Thomases," as well as finding out that there is so much of his boyfriend to love.

Warnings: flirting, kissing, hugging, cuddling, remus being remus, janus being all “we live in a society,” mentions of amazon being a not great company (lmk if anything should be added, otherwise this is pure fluff!)

-

Things had been going spectacularly well with the cute disaster gay Nico had met at the mall. Since that fateful meeting, the two had exchanged numbers, gone on more dates… and well, it had been a few months now and Nico was pretty sure that Thomas was it for him. He really couldn’t picture his future without Thomas somewhere in it. Nico wasn’t really sure what he’d do without Thomas’s infectious enthusiasm, how he could go a day without seeing the way his eyes lit up when he talked about his passions or the way pink would dust his cheeks when Nico used any term of endearment towards him… well now Nico was just waxing poetic now, wasn’t he? Sue him, he was a poet! And Thomas had irrevocably become his muse.

“I was rambling again, wasn’t I?” Thomas asked, startling Nico from his thoughts. The two of them were in Thomas’s apartment, Nico watching Thomas playing Kingdom Hearts. Well… it was more Thomas playing for a bit, then pausing the game to ramble about the lore and storyline of Kingdom Hearts. But Nico was more than content to listen and watch as Thomas gestured emphatically as he spoke. Although Nico admittedly got caught up in how Thomas’s voice was like audible sunshine, how Thomas could start literally glowing from excitement and Nico wouldn’t bat an eye… Thomas once confessed to him that he had thought Nico was radiant the first time he saw him, but Nico was pretty sure it was the other way around. Thomas was the radiant one, like a beam of sunlight that had gotten confused and taken human form.

“No, it’s okay! I like hearing you ramble, it’s cute! Although… I will admit that I might have gotten a little distracted by said cuteness and zoned out,” Nico replied with a sheepish laugh. Thomas flushed and let out a squeak, hands flapping excitedly for a moment before he covered his mouth, as if he were trying to hold back the squeak that he had already let out.

“You know I don’t know how to respond to compliments!” Thomas protested when he dropped his hands down from his mouth.

“Think of it this way, babe- if I keep giving you compliments, you’ll have more practice at responding to them! Besides, you’re unreasonably cute when you get all blushy and stimmy like this,” Nico said with a grin. Thomas squeaked again, this time opting to bury his whole face in his hands.

“This is RUDE I’m being ATTACKED!” Thomas exclaimed, voice muffled behind his hands. Nico chuckled, shaking his head at his boyfriend’s dramatics.

“Okay, okay, I’ll show mercy. I was gonna get some water soon anyway. Need anything while I’m up?” he asked. Thomas looked up from his hands then, face still flushed but looking less like he was going to melt.

“Nah, I’m fine, thanks though,” Thomas replied.

“Be right back,” Nico said, and with a kiss to Thomas’s cheek to fix the not-melting problem, Nico stood up and walked over to the kitchen. He flicked on the light, and he was still rather lost in his thoughts about Thomas that he didn’t notice the man sitting on the counter until he looked up and locked eyes with him. He was… Thomas?! Or at least, someone who looked eerily similar to Thomas. He wore a black hoodie with plaid purple patches and for a moment, Nico thought he had sparkly purple eyeshadow underneath his eyes. But then the man locked eyes with Nico and the eyeshadow was black. Nico let out a surprised yelp, the man sitting on the counter yelped back, and soon enough both of them were screaming.

“Uh… everything okay in here?” Thomas asked, frowning with concern as he walked into the kitchen. He didn’t seem perturbed by the man on the counter, and Nico looked between them incredulously.

“So… were you going to tell me you had a twin, or was I just supposed to get scared half to death by finding him sitting on the counter?!” Nico demanded, unable to keep his voice from rising with mild panic. Thomas’s mouth dropped open, and he looked at the man, then back to Nico.

“You can see him?!” Thomas gasped. Nico’s expression twisted with confusion.

“Uh… kinda hard to miss an emo version of you sitting on the counter. Thomas, who is this and why are you so shocked that I can see him?” Nico asked, glancing to the man again, who looked like he wanted nothing more than to cease to exist at that present moment. But surprisingly, the man spoke up.

“He’s surprised because I’m part of him,” he said, and he even sounded like Thomas, but his voice was rougher and deeper.

“What do you mean, ‘part of him?’” Nico asked slowly.

“This is Virgil, he’s my anxiety. And up until now… I thought I was the only one who could see him,” Thomas explained. And frankly, this clarification just left Nico even more confused.

“So… your anxiety is somehow… personified? And is a real, actual person?” Nico asked.

“He’s not… ‘real,’ in that sort of sense, I thought he was more like… a figment of my imagination, or a projection of how I was feeling, anxiety-wise? Although he and the others are able to interact with the real world sometimes…” Thomas trailed off thoughtfully.

“Wait wait wait. Back up. Others?!” Nico exclaimed. Thomas instantly looked a little sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I- um, well…”

“We’re his ‘sides.’ Parts of his personality, basically. There’s Logan, Patton, Roman… and a few more,” Virgil explained, fidgeting with his hoodie sleeves and eyes glued to the floor.

“Oh. Okay then… so are all of you just in his head the rest of the time? How come I haven’t seen any of you before?” Nico asked.

“We usually are in his head, yeah. But I don’t know why you haven’t seen any of us until now. Heck, me and Roman were with Thomas when he met you!” Virgil exclaimed, biting his thumb nervously after his rather panicked outburst.

“Wait, you were?” Nico asked, looking to Thomas for confirmation. Thomas smiled sheepishly, dropping his hand from the back of his neck.

“Yeah. In fact, Virgil was the one who pushed me to talk to you. And uh- I mean the ‘pushed’ part literally,” Thomas explained.

“Wait really? I just thought you were clumsy- not that being clumsy is a bad thing! Kinda endearing, actually,” Nico said, expecting the inevitable blush to travel over Thomas’s face- but what he wasn’t expecting was a squeak from Virgil and his eyeshadow turning sparkly and purple.

“I mean, to be fair I am a little clumsy sometimes,” Thomas said with a nervous laugh. Nico glanced between Virgil and Thomas, a bit of a playful smirk quirking on his lips.

“Well, whether your clumsiness is just you or your sides- I think you’re all around endearing,” Nico said, voice nearly a purr. Thomas let out a delighted little sound and flapped his hands with excitement, and Virgil outright giggled. If Nico hadn’t thought Thomas was everything to him before, he definitely thought so now with meeting one of his sides.

“Your eyeshadow turns purple and sparkly when Thomas is excited, that is adorable,” Nico cooed. Virgil let out a sound that was half giggle and half yelp, hiding his flushed face in his hands. After a few deep breaths to calm himself down, he peeked up at Nico, looking timid and insecure.

“You really think so?” Virgil asked quietly, tensing up as if he were afraid of the answer.

“I do think so. It makes sense after all… Thomas is adorable, therefore his sides are adorable too,” Nico replied with a shrug. Virgil let out an elated giggle, hands flapping excitedly- and in that moment, Nico knew that he was more than okay with Thomas having sides. It just meant there was more of him to love and appreciate.

-

Since meeting Virgil, Nico was determined to meet the rest of the sides. Thomas had explained that he could summon them whenever he wanted, but Nico insisted that they could just come to him on their own. He had felt a little bad about his first meeting with Virgil being so panic-inducing for all of them, and didn’t really want a repeat of that situation. But luckily, Nico didn’t have to wait that long to meet another one of Thomas’s sides.

Nico had been sitting at the table, idly chatting with Thomas while he was in the kitchen making dinner for the two of them. Nico had offered to help, but being the sweetheart he was, Thomas insisted that he was more than happy to handle dinner. As they were talking, one of Thomas’s sides rose up into existence. This side wore glasses, a black polo, and a tie… Nico made a mental note to tell Thomas that he looked very good dressed a bit more formally.

“Thomas, please be sure to preheat the oven for the garlic bread this time,” the formally dressed side said. Then he looked over and seemed to notice Nico, and though his expression seemed carefully maintained and neutral, Nico could see his eyes lighting up with excitement.

“Hi there!” Nico said, giving a small wave. A smile crept over the side’s face for half a second, but his expression quickly turned neutral again, and he adjusted his tie nervously.

“Hello. I am Logan, Thomas’s-”

“Wait! Don’t tell me which side you are, I wanna guess! It’s kind of like a puzzle… although I guess that’s kind of weird to say about part of your boyfriend’s personality…” Nico trailed off sheepishly. Logan’s face lit up, and this time it was purely unrestrained. If Nico could get heart eyes like a cartoon character, he certainly would have in this situation. Something about seeing this serious side of Thomas so excited… it made Nico’s heart flutter.

“Do you like puzzles?” Logan asked, sounding like he was trying not to seem too hopeful.

“I love puzzles!” Nico exclaimed. A grin took over Logan’s face, and with a wave of his hand, a puzzle appeared on the kitchen table. It was a Nightmare Before Christmas one of Jack Skellington’s face being made up of various scenes and characters from the movie.

“Oh- wait, I’m not sure if you’re going to be able to-” Logan’s sentence cut off abruptly when Nico reached out and took the lid off the top of the box.

“What were you saying?” Nico asked, setting the lid down and looking up to Logan. Nico could only describe his expression as calculating, but in a warm and endearing way.

“Fascinating,” Logan murmured, gazing at Nico. He felt his face heat up slightly at the attention, but was mostly feeling a little lost.

“Logan? What’s going on, buddy?” Thomas asked, observing the two of them from the other side of the kitchen counter. Logan blinked, shaking his head and looking a little sheepish.

“Apologies. I was rather fascinated that Nico was able to touch the puzzle box. I had momentarily forgotten that I am technically imaginary, and therefore anything I would summon would be imaginary as well. However, Nico seems to be able to interact with the puzzle,” Logan explained, and frankly Nico felt like he could listen to Logan talk for ages. He was so precise and professional with the way he spoke, but there was still an undercurrent of excitement and fascination.

“Maybe you guys are becoming more real, somehow?” Nico suggested.

“Perhaps, but you seem to be the only one who can see us. There have been some close calls with Joan and some of Thomas’s other close friends, but you have been the only one who has outright interacted with us,” Logan explained. Nico hummed thoughtfully as he began sorting out the puzzle pieces. Logan sat down with him and helped sort the pieces as well, flushing slightly as their hands brushed whenever they reached for the same pieces.

“Maybe it has to do with how close to Thomas someone is?” Nico asked. A contemplative expression came over Logan’s face.

“I am not responsible for Thomas’s emotions, so I would have no way of knowing. But that is a plausible theory,” Logan replied. Nico nodded, and went back to the puzzle for a few moments, sneaking a few glances at Logan every now and then.

“Well, you confirmed that you aren’t Thomas’s emotional side, and I know you aren’t his anxiety because I already met Virgil. And you seem to like Nightmare Before Christmas, but I’m not sure if that really contributes to which side you are,” Nico said, and was surprised to see Logan flush with mild embarrassment.

“I- while your skills of deduction are admirable, my reasonings for summoning a Nightmare Before Christmas puzzle was not because I enjoy the movie, but because you seem to. If the sticker on your laptop is any evidence to go by,” Logan admitted a tad sheepishly. This time it was Nico’s turn to blush, and he placed his hand over Logan’s with a grin.

“Logan, that’s so sweet! So tell me, what do you like?” Nico asked, squeezing Logan’s hand before removing it to continue the puzzle. Logan stared at his hand for a moment or two, then blinked and shook his head.

“I- erm, I do have an- an appreciation for mysteries and detective stories,” Logan replied, stumbling over his words slightly. Nico glanced up from the puzzle to see that Logan looked a little flustered, and a small smile came to his face at the sight.

“So let’s see… not emotional, seems very factual and is on the more serious side, likes puzzles, mysteries, and detectives… my guess is that you’re Thomas’s intellectual side,” Nico said. Logan’s face broke out into a grin and his expression lit up with pride, sending butterflies fluttering through Nico’s stomach.

“Correct! Although technically speaking, my official ‘title’ of sorts is that I am Thomas’s Logic,” Logan said, voice surprisingly warm and fond.

“Well then, Mr. Logic, shall we finish this puzzle?” Nico asked with a grin. A small smile slipped onto Logan’s face.

“I think we shall, Mr. Flores.”

-

Nico and Thomas had been having what they liked to call “joint creativity days.” The two of them would hang out in Thomas’s apartment while Thomas would work on a script for a video, while Nico would work on his songs or poetry. And it was on one of these joint creativity days that Nico met another one of Thomas’s sides.

“By the prophecies of Apollo, are you writing a sonnet?!” a hushed, yet excited voice piped up beside Nico. He looked over to see one of Thomas’s sides nestled rather close to him on the couch, eyes lit up with awe as he looked at Nico’s screen. The side in question was dressed like a stereotypical prince: white tunic with gold detailing, a bright red sash- but oddly enough, no crown.

“Well… I’m trying to. My songs aren’t really going anywhere, so I decided I’d try to do some poetry. But I’m getting tripped up on the syllables,” Nico said with a sigh.

“Why restrict your wondrous writing to the syllables of a sonnet? Although I do appreciate the Bard’s work,” the princely side asked.

“I thought giving myself some guidelines would help, otherwise I’ll feel like I have too many options and I don’t end up writing anything at all,” Nico said with a sigh.

“It doesn’t seem like you’re writing much with those guidelines- but this certainly is a good start!” the side said, eyes scanning over the words again. A thoughtful expression came over the side’s face, and Nico could practically see the creative gears turning in his mind. Wait… creative? Could he be- well, Nico should probably ask the side’s name before making any guesses.

“Oh gosh, what am I doing? I didn’t even ask for your name or anything!” Nico said with a sheepish laugh. The side blinked, startling slightly as he was torn from the partially written sonnet. His face broke out into a charming grin as he sprung to his feet, got down on one knee in front of the couch and took Nico’s hand in his. Nico thought he was flustered at the side’s actions- but then he spoke and Nico was fairly sure his face was burning.

“Prince Roman at your service, my fair poet,” he murmured with a kiss to the back of Nico’s hand. Nico let out a sound he absolutely refused to call a squeak.

“Where is this suave-ness when I’m trying to flirt with Nico?!” Thomas demanded indignantly. Roman stood up with a huff.

“Virgil can be very convincing when it comes to not flirting versus flirting!” Roman squawked indignantly.

“Good point,” Thomas replied with a sigh.

“Well, whenever you are comfortable enough to do it, the suave-ness is much appreciated by me,” Nico said, only sounding slightly strangled. Roman’s face lit up, and he clapped his hands together excitedly as he bounced on the balls of his feet (the lack of crown now made sense to Nico, with how much the prince seemed to move).

“Really?!” Roman squealed.

“Of course, Prince Roman- or should I say, Thomas’s creativity and passion?” Nico guessed with a grin. Nico thought Roman looked rather joyous before, but Roman’s expression turned positively ecstatic. Nico half-expected Roman to start glowing with how enthused he looked. He all but bounded forward to sit next to Nico again and hug him tightly- and then he pressed a kiss to Nico’s cheek. Nico’s face heated up once more… and okay, fine, he squeaked. Roman drew back from him quickly, looking completely mortified.

“I have never thought about a single decision I have ever made,” Roman said, voice coming out quiet and mildly strained. Nico gave Roman a comforting smile, and took the prince’s hand and squeezed it gently. Roman’s tensed form instantly relaxed, but he still looked a little distraught.

“I don’t mind a little spontaneity, your highness,” Nico murmured, thumb rubbing soothing circles over the back of Roman’s hand. A sound between a gasp and an exclamation left Roman’s lips and a delightful pink flush grew over his cheeks.

“I- Nico, you- I…” Roman rambled, seeming at a loss for words. Nico smiled warmly and leaned over to kiss Roman’s temple… and well, it looked like Roman wasn’t going to be formulating words any time soon.

“Nico! Now I’m really not going to get any work on this script done!” Thomas said with a laugh, setting his laptop aside.

“I can’t help that my boyfriend and his sides are so handsome and lovely! It makes complimenting you so easy,” Nico said, flashing Thomas a grin. Thomas squeaked, blushing just as brightly as Roman.

“This is DISTINCTLY not fair!” Roman pouted, which was frankly adorable in Nico’s humble opinion.

“You started it, dear Prince,” Nico hummed with a shrug, turning back to his sonnet. Nothing like a little mutual flirting and flustering to get the writing motivation flowing.

-

Halloween was approaching, which meant that pumpkin patches started opening up. So Nico came up with the date idea of going to a pumpkin patch and carving pumpkins afterwards. And was the main purpose of this date to wear cute fall clothes and take pictures with Thomas? Maybe. But Nico also really loved Halloween and carving pumpkins, so really it was a win-win.

Nico took pumpkin carving very seriously, so he was meticulous when it came to choosing a pumpkin. Thomas had already chosen his, and was watching on fondly while Nico pondered over the pumpkins. Nico had narrowed down his choices to two pumpkins when a voice piped up beside him.

“Having trouble picking there, pumpkin?” the voice asked, and Nico glanced over to see one of Thomas’s sides crouched beside him. Nico couldn’t think of any other way to describe this side other than a dad with an affinity for cats. He wore glasses, a blue polo, khakis, and a cat hoodie tied around his shoulders. Nico blinked at the side with mild confusion.

“Was that… a pun?” Nico asked. The side let out a sheepish laugh, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Yeahhh… not my best one. Oh hey! Can I just say that you look gord-eous today?” he said with a grin. Against his will, Nico’s face flushed and a giggle escaped his lips.

“You have a dad side?” Nico said, standing and turning towards Thomas with a laugh of disbelief. Thomas let out a sheepish laugh.

“Well, he’s technically more than that… but pretty much yeah,” Thomas replied.

“I didn’t think you or your sides could get any more adorable,” Nico said with a grin. Thomas flushed slightly, and a squeal came from the side beside Nico.

“Oh kiddo! You’re so sweet!” he cooed. Nico turned to the dad side with a slightly mischievous grin.

“Am I sweet as… pumpkin pie?” he asked. Thomas’s side giggled, while Thomas groaned at the pun.

“I’d say you’re even sweeter! My name’s Patton, by the way,” he said, holding out a hand to Nico. He looked at the offered hand, then to Patton’s face.

“Sorry Patton, but I don’t think a handshake is gonna do. Could I have a hug instead?” Nico asked. Patton’s face lit up like a child’s did on Christmas, and he pulled Nico into his arms with an elated sound. Thomas was a good hugger, Nico always felt safe and loved in his arms- but hugging Patton was that feeling times a thousand. Patton just radiated care and comfort, and Nico hadn’t really thought he needed a hug earlier, but part of him felt absolutely relieved to be hugged. One of Patton’s hands came up to gently card through Nico’s hair, and he all but purred at the touch.

“I’m not getting Patton back anytime soon, am I?” Thomas joked.

“No,” Nico replied with a slight pout, hugging Patton tighter.

“No complaints here!” Patton said, and Nico could hear his smile in his voice.

“I mean, to everyone else it probably looks like you’re hugging the air,” Thomas pointed out with a chuckle. Nico sighed, and regretfully drew away from Patton.

“That’s okay, I can always hug you later when there aren’t people around!” Patton chirped with a sunny grin. Okay, so Patton was definitely the side responsible for Thomas being like a ray of sunshine that came to life. But Nico had no clue as to what part of Thomas that made Patton. His kindness, maybe? But Nico had a feeling that Patton was more than that, that there was something more than the puns and cheerful attitude.

“I’ve gotta say Patton, you’ve got me a little stumped. Puns, sunny disposition, kindness… but I feel like there’s something more to you than that, something more specific that I can’t quite put my finger on,” Nico hummed thoughtfully.

“Do you want a hint?” Patton offered. Nico pondered this for a moment or two, then nodded.

“Sure, just don’t give it to me too easily,” he replied. Patton grinned, clapping his hands together excitedly.

“Yay! Well Nico, I just wanted to say that I am morally obligated to tell you that I heartily look forward to our next hug!” Patton exclaimed. Nico blinked in mild confusion, getting the feeling that Patton had used two puns in his hint. He pondered Patton’s sentence for a moment or two, regarding the side with a contemplative look.

“Are you… his morals? Or his heart?” Nico asked, more thinking out loud rather than settling on an answer.

“Both! Well, ‘officially’ I’m Thomas’s morality, his sense of right and wrong- but I’m his heart too!” Patton chirped.

“I knew there was something more to you than really good hugs and dad jokes,” Nico replied with a grin. Patton giggled, face flushing ever so slightly as he fiddled with the sleeves of his cat hoodie.

“Well, to be fair… I am mostly that sort of stuff,” he said, sounding a little sheepish. Nico regarded Patton with a concerned expression. Something about Patton’s demeanor… it struck Nico that perhaps the side didn’t think of himself all that highly. Maybe it was a bit of a stretch to assume, considering he had just met him, but there was insecurity in every fiber of his stance.

“Maybe, but it takes a lot of wisdom to deal with moral issues. You can be smart and silly, it’s not a dichotomy,” Nico said with a soft smile. Patton’s eyes grew wide behind his glasses, and Nico was vaguely startled to see that it looked like he was going to cry.

“Oh- I- well… well Logan’s the smart one, not me,” Patton protested, though his voice was soft and hopeful.

“Sure, Logan is logic and facts, and ‘traditional’ intelligence… but there’s a lot of different types of intelligence. You seem to lean towards emotional intelligence, which does make you smart and caring- plus you must be pretty witty to come up with puns,” Nico said, still smiling softly.

“Oh,” Patton said softly, eyes still wide and the beginnings of a smile on his face. Patton stood still for half a moment, then rushed forward to hug Nico. This hug felt completely different than the one Nico had received earlier. This time, Patton felt so small in his arms, instead of being all-encompassing comfort. Patton was the one who needed the comfort here, to know that just because he was sweet and silly, it didn’t mean he wasn’t important. Nico hugged him back tightly, reaching a hand up to run through his hair, mirroring what Patton had done with him earlier. Nico looked to Thomas over Patton’s shoulder- and was shocked to see an expression that had been eerily similar to Patton’s- disbelieving yet hopeful. Then it hit Nico- the sides’ insecurities were Thomas’s too, at least on some level. He squeezed Patton tighter and smiled at Thomas comfortingly. There was so much of Thomas to love- and Nico was determined to show Thomas that he loved every part of him.

-

Thomas and Nico were curled up on the couch, Thomas’s arm around him with his head resting on top of Nico’s. They were having a rather relaxed evening by watching The Lion King, arguably one of Nico’s favorite Disney movies (other than Nightmare Before Christmas, of course). What made this particular viewing of The Lion King so enjoyable was Thomas softly singing along to the songs and his laughter at various parts of the movie. They had gotten to “Can You Feel the Love Tonight” in the movie when Nico heard some snickering from off to the side. Nico looked over to see a mustached side with a white streak through his hair hiding behind the couch. Out of all the sides Nico had met so far, he looked the most different from Thomas. Yet something about him reminded Nico of Roman- they definitely seemed to have a similar style, as something about the side seemed regal with the elaborate black tunic and electric green sash.

“What are you giggling about?” Nico asked. The side merely cackled, wiggling excitedly behind the couch.

“You’ll seeeeeee,” he crooned. Thomas looked over to the side with an apprehensive look and sighed.

“Remus-” Thomas started, but the side (Remus?) quickly shushed him. Thomas huffed out a sigh and rolled his eyes, snuggling back into Nico. They continued watching the scene for a little while longer until Remus broke down into giggles, causing Thomas to sigh again.

“What’s so funny?” Nico asked, glancing between the television and Remus. They had gotten to the part of the song where Simba and Nala had rolled down the hill together, and Nico couldn’t quite figure out what was so amusing about that.

“Oh come on, Nala was totally asking Simba to hakuna her tatas with those bedroom eyes she was giving him,” Remus cackled. Thomas’s expression was twisted with a mixture of disgust and disappointment, while Nico couldn’t help but burst into laughter. Both Thomas and Remus looked surprised at his reaction, but Nico was too busy laughing to really wonder why.

“Hakuna her- oh my goodness how did I never think of that-” Nico said between laughs.

“And you said it would be a bad idea if I talked to Nico!” Remus scoffed with a grin.

“Cause I thought you would traumatize him, not- not whatever is happening here!” Thomas protested.

“What is happening here is that I am hilarious,” Remus shot back, his grin turning more smug than chaotic. Nico finally managed to stop laughing and catch his breath, looking to Remus with an inquisitive look.

“So you’re- what, pure chaos and humor? You also remind me of Roman in a weird way… I can’t quite puzzle you out,” Nico pondered. Remus opened his mouth to say something else, but was cut off by an indignant voice from the end of the couch.

“I resent that, I am NOTHING like him!” Roman exclaimed, crossing his arms and pouting slightly.

“Hey! I’m talking to Nico now, you got to meet him a few days ago!” Remus shouted back. Roman and Remus quickly devolved into childish bickering, sounding more like a pair of kids than two sides of a grown man.

“This is the first time I’ve seen your sides interact with each other, do they always bicker like this?” Nico whispered to Thomas, gaze darting between Roman and Remus as they continued to argue.

“More or less, but these two are a… special case,” Thomas muttered.

“I am quite special and spectacular, thank you,” Roman said, abandoning his argument with Remus to turn to Thomas and Nico.

“Pretty sure ‘special’ was not a compliment there, Ro-Bro,” Remus huffed. Roman let out a dramatic groan, looking to Remus his nose wrinkled in distaste.

“Why did you call me ‘Ro-Bro’, I know you have the capability to be cleverer than that,” Roman huffed.

“Well it’s true! Your name is Ro, and you’re my bro! And Thomas told me I couldn’t traumatize Nico,” Remus pouted.

“Wait, ‘bro?’ Like you guys are actually brothers?” Nico blurted, interrupting the argument before it could really begin.

“Unfortunately,” Roman huffed.

“Well I think I am an absolute delight to have as a brother,” Remus shot back, sticking out his tongue.

“More like an absolute fright!” Roman fired back.

“Awww, you called me a fright! That’s gotta be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me!” Remus chirped, seeming genuinely pleased. Roman let out a long sigh.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Please don’t scare off Thomas’s boyfriend?” Roman huffed. To Nico’s surprise, Remus flushed slightly.

“I won’t,” he muttered. Seeming satisfied, Roman sunk out, leaving Thomas and Nico with Remus. Nico turned to look at Remus who seemed… uncharacteristically sheepish. Nico hadn’t really known Remus for all that long, but something told him that he wasn’t the type of side to be particularly bashful.

“So… Remus. Roman’s your brother? Does that mean you guys have similar functions?” Nico asked with a contemplative expression. Remus squirmed semi-uncomfortably for a moment or two before huffing out a sigh.

“I guess so. Technically,” he said with a slight pout. Nico regarded him with a concerned eye. Remus seemed just as unwilling to admit that he had any similarities to Roman as Roman was unwilling to admit that he had any similarities to Remus.

“So you’re creativity too? But Thomas and Roman both said something about scaring or traumatizing me… so you’re Thomas’s darker creative thoughts?” Nico asked.

“Yup. But I’m his intrusive thoughts too. Y’know, those random little thoughts you get about how easy it would be to stab somebody while they’re helping you do the dishes and you happen to be drying a knife,” Remus replied, his strange melancholy demeanor shifting to something more malicious and chaotic as he spoke. Nico was suddenly reminded of the other day when he was helping Thomas do the dishes after dinner, and how Thomas had dropped a knife like it had burned him while he was drying it. Nico had fussed over him and asked if he was okay, and Thomas just blamed it on clumsiness. But now Nico could see that there was a bit more to Thomas lurking beneath the surface. Nico knew that Thomas would never hurt him- if the immense guilt and shame currently written over his face was anything to go by- but it did hurt Nico’s heart a bit to know that Thomas struggled with such thoughts and felt ashamed to talk about it.

“Well… just because you think such things doesn’t mean you’d ever do them, and thinking those sorts of things doesn’t make you an irredeemably bad person either. Plus it’s not a bad thing to have a darker imagination! Stories can’t be all sunshine and rainbows, sometimes you’ve gotta have a little darkness to even things out,” Nico explained in a soothing tone, relieved when both Thomas and Remus perked up.

“Really?” Remus asked in a disbelieving tone.

“Really! Trust me, I’m a poet. And poets love writing about dark stuff, just look at Edgar Allan Poe! He’s one of my inspirations, did you know that?” Nico asked, grinning when Remus’s face lit up.

“Me too! The Tell-Tale Heart is one of my favorites of his!” Remus exclaimed, beginning to chatter away about hearts beneath floorboards and birds that foretold death. Thomas muttered something about Nico providing Remus more nightmare fuel to torment him with, to which Nico happily placated him with a peck on the cheek and the promise to defend him from any nightmares.

-

On more than one occasion, some of Nico’s friends had enthusiastically recommended the show Good Omens to him. As it turned out, Thomas’s friends were also recommending the show to him. So they both figured it could be something they could experience together. Watching Good Omens had become a bit of a weekend tradition, and they were now halfway through the show. Nico was getting popcorn ready in the kitchen, while Thomas fussed over the television setup. For whatever reason, Thomas seemed to be struggling with pulling it up… no, that wasn’t quite it. Thomas seemed strangely hesitant about pulling up Amazon Prime onto his television.

“Something up, babe?” Nico asked as he carried the popcorn into the living room.

“No! No, I’m fine,” Thomas replied, a little too quickly as he queued up the show and sat down on the couch. For a brief moment, Nico could have sworn he heard a chilling laugh and a flash of yellow out of the corner of his eye, but when he turned to follow it, there was nothing there. Shaking his head, Nico sat down beside Thomas and instantly cuddled into his side, popcorn still in hand.

“Sure doesn’t sound like you’re fine,” Nico said, raising an eyebrow and tilting his head up to meet Thomas’s eyes. He fidgeted for a moment or two before replying.

“Just saw an article the other day about Amazon, that’s all,” Thomas said with a sigh.

“Yeah, Jeff Bezos is a crummy guy, and unfortunately we live in a capitalist world where there is no such thing as ethical consumption,” Nico said, tone grim and melancholy.

“He’s right, Thomas. After all- what’s the phrase? Ah yes… ‘we live in a society,’” a voice crooned. Nico jumped, nearly spilling the popcorn in the process, and looked over to see one of Thomas’s sides seated on the far end of the couch. The side’s appearance absolutely radiated “stereotypical villain” with the bowler hat, capelet, and yellow gloves- but Nico couldn’t help but be reminded of Crowley due to the scales on half his face and the piercing yellow snake eye. And he wasn’t sure why, but something in the way the side regarded Nico made him flush ever so slightly.

“Janus…” Thomas trailed off, pinching the bridge of his nose as if he felt a headache coming on.

“Now Thomas, we could be avoiding this guilt if we had just pirated the show like I insisted. But instead, we’re kissing up to-” the side- Janus- started, but was cut off by Thomas.

“There are… good points to what each of you are saying. But like I said before, there is no ethical consumption under capitalism. If we spent our time trying to debate the moral standards of each and every piece of media we consume- well, we wouldn’t really have anything to consume. And that doesn’t mean we should outright ignore things like a company treating their workers terribly, but we shouldn’t beat ourselves up over something that isn’t in the realm of our immediate control either. Instead, what we can do is sign petitions and look into how else we can support underpaid and overworked workers. Besides, Good Omens is arguably queer, Neil Gaiman himself has made that pretty clear. We don’t get much of that,” Nico pointed out. Thomas and Janus seemed to ponder this for a moment or two, until Janus’s face broke into a sly grin that definitely had Nico blushing.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. But pirating makes Virgil freak out cause what if I end up getting a virus when I download the show from a sketchy website and then all my data gets stolen, and then-” Thomas rambled, before Janus butted in.

“And Patton prattles on about how pirating is stealing, and stealing is wrong- but tell me, stealing from a corrupt company makes a right, don’t you think?” Janus said, gaze flicking to Nico for confirmation.

“I think I underestimated you, Mr. Flores,” Janus purred, and Nico’s face was absolutely burning at this point.

“And I thought Roman was handsome and charming,” Nico said in a strangled whisper, not really meaning to say what he was thinking out loud, but was glad he did when the human side of Janus’s face turned a bright red.

“I- erm. That’s- whatever,” Janus scoffed, examining his gloves in an excuse to not meet Nico’s gaze.

“Y’know, that’s impressive. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him speechless,” Thomas commented dryly. Janus merely hissed at Thomas in reply, and Nico couldn’t help but giggle.

“Well what I think is impressive is that you have a snakey crime side,” Nico said between laughs.

“Flatterer,” Janus accused, although he was absolutely preening at Nico’s comment.

“Maybe I just think my boyfriend and his sides deserve to be flattered,” Nico replied with a shrug. Thomas let out a flustered giggle, and Janus’s human side of his face was quickly turning red again.

“Well, obviously he does. I knew that,” Janus said, trying (and failing) to seem aloof.

“The flattering also includes you here, Janus,” Nico said with a chuckle.

“Really? Oh, I’m not sure about that,” he replied, smiling coyly. Nico grinned wickedly, and Thomas glanced between Nico and Janus in a mix of mild confusion and intrigue.

“Then I’m sure you’d absolutely hate to hear that I find you incredibly stunning,” Nico purred.

“Careful there, angel- lest you fall prey to the snake in the garden,” Janus replied with a grin, flashing fangs that Nico was pretty sure weren’t there before. His brain was a little too busy re-playing the way Janus had purred “angel” on loop to actually remember.

“Speaking of snakes in gardens and angels- are we ever going to get around to watching Good Omens today or not?” Thomas asked with a chuckle.

“In a minute! I haven’t figured out which one of your sides Janus is yet,” Nico protested, shaking off his flusteredness to regard Janus with a curious eye.

“Oh please, as if you could ever unravel the marvelous mystery that is-”

“Let’s see, sneaky, snarky, dramatic, cunning, wants to encourage Thomas to commit minor crimes… anything else I’m missing?” Nico asked, cutting Janus off.

“... you forgot s-s-snakey,” Janus pouted. Nico broke into giggles at the sudden shift in Janus’s demeanor.

“Right, you’re right, sorry. So… you’re his… trickery and cunning side?” Nico tried. Janus pondered his answer for a moment or two, before he broke into a pleased grin.

“Well, I do encompass those things as well, I suppose. So I’ll give it to you- but formally, I am Thomas’s Deceit,” he said, tipping his hat to Nico.

“Pleasure to meet you, Deceit. Well, with that settled, we can watch Good Omens now!” Nico said, patting the spot on the couch next to him. Janus looked surprised for a moment or two before he shook it off and his expression was back to smug indifference.

“Well, I suppose I can be tempted to stay,” Janus said, sinking out for a moment before reappearing next to Nico. After setting the popcorn on the coffee table first, Nico grabbed one of Janus’s hands to pull him into the cuddling he and Thomas were currently engaged in.

“Hey, you’re just letting him stay cause you want double the cuddles!” Thomas teased.

“What makes you say that?” Nico asked as he wrapped an arm around Janus- while more arms than were normal for a human being wrapped themselves around Nico.

“Don’t lie to a liar, darling,” Janus crooned as he snuggled himself into Nico’s chest. Thomas rolled his eyes fondly, and with his lingering guilt about Amazon aside, the three of them settled in to watch Good Omens.

-

Thomas and Nico were on a walk in a park nearby Thomas’s place, holding hands and swinging them idly between them every once and a while. Every now and then Nico would catch Thomas giving him an incredibly sappy look- but really, Nico couldn’t blame him. After all, he was sure his own expression was as equally lovestruck.

“So, have I met all of your sides yet?” Nico asked, the question meant to be casual, but he was surprised when Thomas’s face twisted with concern and mild guilt.

“Well… you’ve met all the ones I’ve met. There’s still other parts of me that I have yet to confront,” Thomas said with a sigh.

“That’s okay! Learning about yourself is an ongoing process! And to put you at ease, there isn’t a part of you that I’ve met that I don’t love,” Nico said with an unabashedly adoring smile. This admission halted Thomas in his tracks, and he looked to Nico with wide eyes.

“Really?” he asked softly.

“Really,” Nico murmured, pulling Thomas into a kiss. Thomas made an elated sound against his mouth, holding Nico close as they kissed. When the kiss broke, he didn’t go very far, leaning his forehead against Nico’s.

“I love you too, you know,” Thomas said sheepishly.

“I know,” Nico replied with a grin, then gave Thomas another quick kiss before pulling away. He grabbed Thomas’s hand again, and the two of them continued their walk, hopelessly in love with every single part of the other.

-

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