#not a lot happens outside the actual heat stuff

[soaps-mohawk]

So...

How do we feel about Chapter 12 being shorter than the others? Like...significantly shorter? First draft is only at 3.7k words right now...I'm trying to make it longer but like...it is like basically just smut lol. It'll probably get a bit longer as I edit, but it's going to still probably end up being shorter than the other chapters.

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

Bro how would they react if they found out u got pregnant? Cuz yk their pirates and stuff so what would they do? U can do whoever but ik i want shanks, zoro, and mihawk you can do other people or not do the ones or dont do this at all👍 i want i jus want you to be comfortable writing this if you want to write it at all😭

I enjoyed writing this SO MUCH, thank you for the request!!

I just did Zoro, Shanks, and Mihawk for now. May end up doing one for Sanji and Buggy as well if anyone wants, but since I ended up writing these as little short stories instead of headcanons, I just decided to focus on those three this time.

Shanks is already such a dad honestly I lub him <3

So here we gooooo

Whoops

OPLA! Zoro, Shanks, Mihawk x AFAB!Reader

SFW, so fluffy I'm suffocating

Wordcount: 4.6k

No warnings, I think?

Zoro

It took you some time to dredge up the nerve to tell him. It was just a one night stand, after all. A lot of alcohol involved, nothing special. Sure, maybe you’d had a crush on him for a while, but that was in no way relevant. The incorrigible amount of liquor you had consumed had more than done the trick of acting as liquid courage, given you had awoken the next morning in his hammock, both of you stark naked, just a hungover tangle of limbs with no real memory of anything past making out on the quarterdeck while everyone else was staying the night in town.

That had been awkward enough—your eyes locking as you both stirred awake, your face turning beet reed as you scrambled off the green-haired swordsman and quickly threw on enough of your clothes to be able to safely escape, him speaking up behind you as you hurriedly dressed yourself.

“Did we—uh—”

“No idea,” had been your quick, curt response, making sure you didn’t turn around and meet his eye again. “Bye.”

“Wh—? Wait a minute—”

But you had already been out the door. You spent the following days, the following weeks avoiding being alone with the first mate of the Strawhats under any circumstance, avoiding any situation where you might have to actually talk about what had happened between the two of you.

But now you had to talk.

Middle of the night, with everyone else safely asleep so they couldn’t overhear, you stood over him as he lay asleep himself in that same hammock. You stood there for a long, tense moment, arms crossed tight over your stomach, tapping your foot lightly as you looked down at Zoro, deliberating over whether you really had the guts to go through with this.

You decide you have no choice, and you nudge his arm. “Wake up,” you say quietly.

He snores in response.

You sigh to yourself, and nudge his shoulder a little harder, say it again a little more forcefully. “Wake up, come on—”

He gives a small growl of protest at that, rolling his shoulders and stretching his toned arms out behind his head, before tucking one hand under his neck. He squints at you in the small, dark cabin, blinking slowly. The groggy, astonished sort of manner in which he mumbles your name makes your heart skip for a moment.

“Wha…?” He glances past you toward the cabin door, toward the darkness outside on the deck, and asks, “What time is it?”

“Two in the morning.” He quirks an eyebrow as you toe the wooden floor, staring off to the side, biting your lip. “We…need to talk.”

“At…two in the morning,” he repeats slowly. You hum in affirmation and give a small nod, already feeling your face starting to heat up—and you hear him sigh.

Then his hand is around your forearm, and you’re gasping out in alarm as he pulls you down across his chest until your eyes are level with his, your foreheads nearly touching.

His hand slips further up your arm, up your shoulder, back behind your neck, and your blush only grows hotter as he gives you a smirk. “Don’t think there’s really much to talk about.”

And he pulls you down, seizing your lips with his own.

Your brain all but short-circuits. You can barely remember how to breathe as your thoughts whirl. He kissed you. There isn’t a drop of alcohol involved this time, and he still kissed you.

Don’t think there’s really much to talk about.

Maybe that crush of yours was more mutual than you thought it was.

Your eyes flutter shut as you melt against him and return the kiss with a slow sigh, forgetting for a moment what you were doing here in the first place, your tongues meeting and swirling together, his hand drifting down your back, curling around the hem of your shirt and tugging at it and—

And this was exactly how you got into your present predicament in the first place. You tear your lips away from his and sit up at the edge of the hammock, flinching. “No, we…” You glance over your shoulder at him, briefly meeting his eyes as he stares up at you cautiously. “We do need to talk, I…” You swallow, and decide to just rip off the bandage, just say it. “I’m late.”

He’s silent for several seconds, and as you sit there, inwardly panicking, dreading his reaction, he finally speaks up.

“What the hell could you be late for at two in the morning?”

“What—no, I—” you sputter, jerking your head to look over your shoulder at him, sharing his stare of bafflement, as you realized he had no idea what you meant. “I…my period. I—is two weeks late.”

His brow furrows for a moment as that sinks in.

And his eyes slowly widen, and you look quickly away, flinching again, hanging your head.

“O…oh.” He sits up himself, swinging his legs over the side of the hammock to sit next to you, exhaling a slow sigh. “Shit.”

“Mmhmm,” you reply in a weak sort of hum, practically a whimper, watching him run a hand back through his hair from the corner of your eye, his eyes wide, unblinking, glued to the doorframe.

“I…guess it’s a good thing we’ve got a doctor now.” You glance over at him, swallowing nervously as he gives a small, breathless laugh, waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for him to be upset about it, even angry. It was just a stupid, drunken one night stand, after all.

Wasn’t it?

Not really much to talk about. His words ring in your head as you watch him fall back across the width of the hammock with another laugh, resting a hand over his eyes. He said it right before he kissed you, sober this time, as if maybe…there was more to it than just an alcohol-fueled one off fling.

“Y…you’re not upset?” you ask carefully, looking down at him.

“Nah,” he says, laughing a little again. He lowers his hand down to rest over his abs, meeting your eyes with a little bit of a grin. “I mean, it is kinda my fault.”

“It takes two,” you point out, frowning.

“Yeah, but you were drunk.”

“We both were.”

“You were really drunk.” You purse your lips and shove at his ribs as he laughs again, sitting back up. He drapes his arm around your shoulders, sighing and shaking his head. “Shit.”

“Shit,” you agree, nodding. “I guess…we talk to Chopper in the morning and…figure things out from there?”

“Yeah. Guess so.” You’re both quiet for a long moment, staring out toward the darkened deck. “You know…” You glance over when he sighs slowly again. “This crew’s…pretty much the closest thing I’ve ever had to family. That most of us have had, probably. Whatever happens with…this—we’ll all have each other’s backs.”

He isn’t at all wrong, and the thought is enough of a comfort to bring a slow sigh of relief from you as well, a small smile to your lips. You shift a little closer and rest your temple at his shoulder, your hand over his, your eyes slipping shut.

“Anyway.,,” Your eyes open when he speaks, and without warning he pushes you back down into the hammock, pressing his lips to yours—and your eyes flutter shut again as his tongue brushes your bottom lip amid the slow, playful kiss.

“Wait—” You draw back from it just as abruptly as you were drawn into it, lifting an eyebrow, fighting a smirk. “Isn’t this sort of what got us into this situation to begin with?”

“Yeah,” he says, lowering himself down to his elbow. He smirks as well, his hand resting at the crown of your hair. “But it’s not like you can get any more pregnant.”

You can’t help but giggle at that, hooking your arm around his neck and shaking your head, smiling. “Fair enough,” you agree, and lift your head to press your lips to his again.

Shanks

It all started three weeks ago, when you first missed your cycle. Your paranoia and anxiety that it could mean that, meant you had stopped drinking entirely. Shanks had been too busy to pick up on it, or simply as carefree and oblivious as ever.

But this morning you had awoken early, perhaps earlier than anyone else on the ship. You checked the position of the log posse and adjusted the course accordingly until it was pointing straight ahead again—and that was when you realized, by the sound of a match striking behind you, that you weren’t the first person awake—and someone had noticed the cessation of your drinking with the rest of the crew.

And almost the moment Benn Beckman confronted you about it, you blabbed your worries to the first mate, and you were fairly sure he nearly swallowed his cigarette.

“You’re what?”

You had joined the Red Hair pirates as a navigator around eight months ago, and had quickly fallen for the charming captain. There was no real agreement that there was anything more between the two of you than casual sex and flirting, nothing exclusive; but it hadn’t escaped anyone’s notice that the two of you were spending more and more time together, and that from an outsider’s point of view it looked a lot more like romance than anything casual.

But you were dead terrified that this news would ruin everything.

Beck just shook his head, grabbed you by the shoulder like a misbehaving child as you ranted, and walked you toward the door to the captain’s cabin. He opened it, and gestured at you to get in.

“You don’t come back out until you tell him,” he said, and you flinched at his stern tone. “Got it?”

“Got it…” you sighed wearily, hanging your head as you entered and shut the door lightly behind you. You had the idle hope that Shanks might be asleep as you entered but now, standing in the doorway, you can see clearly that he isn’t. He’s sitting up against the headboard of his bed—the same bed that you’ve been sharing every night for at least six months—and squinting at a map in the dim light of the lantern hanging from one of the bedposts, wearing an unbuttoned white shirt and black boxers. He looks up from it mid-yawn, and waves at you, nodding at the empty side of the bed to his right.

“You’re up awfully early,” he comments as you kick off your boots and climb into bed next to him.

“Just checking the course,” you say as he hands the map off to you—an old treasure map that you found helping clean out his rather cluttered desk a few weeks ago. “Any breakthroughs?”

“That.” He indicates a crude sketch of what appeared to be a statue. “It’s in Arabasta.”

“You’re sure?” you ask, looking over at him, and he nods slowly. “Oh, great. That’s…”

“Crocodile’s territory,” he says, as you let out a sigh that mirrors his own mildly dejected tone. “If we dock there we’ll be up to our tits in his Baroque Works wackjobs. Not that they’d pose us much of a threat, but…balance of power and all that.” He sighs himself, grabbing the map away from you again and tossing it off the side of the bed, where it flutters slowly to the floor a few feet away. “Not to mention it looks like it’s out in the middle of the desert somewhere. Not worth the time.”

“I guess not,” you say, frowning as you watch him sink back into the bed, his eyes slipping shut, unbothered by what might have been a disappointment to almost anyone else. He hadn’t mentioned the map to anyone else except for you and Beck, had kept it otherwise entirely to himself in case it did turn out to be a bust. Nothing ever really seemed to get under his skin.

You close your eyes for a long moment, bracing yourself. Maybe, just maybe, this wouldn’t get under his skin either. Just as you open your mouth to speak, however, he speaks up himself.

“Now, something that’s much more worth my time…”

“Oh—!” You let out a small cry of alarm as he tugs you down suddenly to lie with him, and he shifts so he’s facing you, his forehead resting lightly against yours, his hand creeping slowly up your stomach to where the lapels of your shirt are tied shut, grinning wickedly.

“…is the beautiful woman in my bed who is, frankly, wearing far too many clothes.”

You can’t help but giggle a little as he sets straight to attacking your neck, his lips trailing down the column of your throat as he deftly works the knot loose, lightly nipping at your collarbone as he shifts you onto your back and brushes the lapels of your shirt open. Maybe you could drop it for now, just for now, you think disjointedly, your eyes slipping shut as his fingertips brush over one of the cups of your bra. Just until…

No. No, if you put it off again, you’re just going to keep putting it off.

“No—wait—” You grab his hand, pulling it away, and he lifts his head, raising his eyebrows in puzzlement. You swallow, glancing away for a moment before returning your gaze to meet his. “We…need to talk about something,” you say quietly.

The confusion in his eyes quickly shifts to concern at your hesitant tone, and he slowly lifts himself away from you, sitting up on his knees. “Alright,” he says, just as slowly, just as cautiously, looking at you as if you’re a ticking time bomb about to go off at any second. “What exactly is it that we—”

“I’m pregnant.”

You just blurt it out, before you can stop yourself, so suddenly that Shanks stops mid-sentence with his mouth hanging open. His eyes widen to saucers as he gawks at you, and he blinks rapidly a few times. “B—be—beg pardon?” he stammers.

You just swallow nervously and nod—you know he heard you. He draws in a deep breath, shoulders going limp, and lets it out after a moment as a tremendous sigh, running his hand back through his hair.

It was rare, if ever, that you had seen your carefree captain in an outright panic, but seconds later he was on his feet, pacing back and forth across the cabin, his hand curled over his mouth. You sit up as well, alternating between glancing at him and staring down at your knees, your stomach tied in knots. You’re sure that this is it, this is the end, this is your final stint sailing with the Red Hair pirates. A ship is no place for a child, after all, for a baby, for a woman with child—

He stops pacing suddenly, his hand slipping down to his chin. “Midwife. We’re going to need—that’s what they’re called, isn’t it?” You lift your head, staring at him in mild alarm as he resumes pacing, now rambling aloud. “We’ll need a midwife, I hardly think Hongo’s qualified—might know someone who is, but…” He shakes his head. “Still probably a good idea for you to talk to—have you?” he asks, stopping to look over at you, and you shake your head rapidly. The only inkling you have that you are pregnant is that you’ve gone well over a month without a period; you had been far too scared to talk with the ship’s doctor about the concern, afraid that he would go straight to Shanks and you would be shoved straight off the ship at the next populated port.

“We’ll need to set that up immediately,” he half-mumbles, and resumes pacing again. “How far along do you think you are?”

“I—er—” Your head is absolutely spinning. “M…maybe eight weeks?”

“Eight? That’s two months, tha—that means there’s only seven more, we’ll need—everything, crib, clothes, probably a rocking chair…”

You listen in growing astonishment as he rapidly lists off everything, already planning far more than you had even thought to, not even the slightest bit upset. He seems almost…excited. You swallow, exhaling a slow, shaking breath, your eyes burning a little as relief floods through you.

“…diapers—” He stops in his tracks again, lowering his hand from his chin and looking at it, frowning. “How am I supposed to change a diaper with one ha—”

He looks over sharply when a small sob escapes you before you can lift your hand to muffle it. You lower your head, closing your eyes tightly, gripping at the edge of the bed as that overwhelming flood of emotion becomes too much to contain.

“Oh—sweetheart…no, no no…” You hear him sigh, his footsteps quickly crossing the room. The bed sinks beside you as he sits down and wraps his arm around you, pulling you tight against his chest and resting his hand near the nape of your neck. “It’s alright, love,” he murmurs gently, combing his fingers through your hair, pressing a kiss to your temple. “It’s alright, we can handle this, okay?”

“I—I thought—” Your breath hitches as you turn your head so your cheek is pressed against his shoulder. “I thought you’d be mad,” you force out. “Th—that I’d—I’d have to leave and—and—”

He tightens his hold around your back, letting out a few soft chuckles and shaking his head. “That’s an absolutely ridiculous thing to think,” he tells you.

“It…didn’t seem ridiculous to me,” you say quietly, your voice choked.

“Well, it is,” he assures you again. “I don’t—look, love.” He shifts his hand from the nape of your neck to your cheek, lifting your head and pressing his forehead against yours. His thumb wipes away the tears streaming down your face, and he smiles warmly. “I don’t want you anywhere but right here. With me. Okay?” Your breaths leaves you in a trembling sigh at the sincerity in his soft tone, the softness in his brown eyes as he gazes into yours. You swallow, and nod quickly, closing your eyes for a long moment.

You draw in a sharp breath in surprise when you feel his lips press lightly against yours in a slow, tender kiss that eases almost all of your tension away in an instant. one of your hands slipping from your lap to rest against his knee as your lips just barely part.

“I love you,” he murmurs, and the knots in your stomach are gone as he lowers his hand to rest it there, smiling. “And we can handle this.”

“I…I love you too,” you whisper, and his smile only broadens at that.

He kisses you again, more firmly this time, before standing suddenly from the bed.

Before you can fully register what’s happening, he’s already heading out the door of the cabin and out onto the quarterdeck, calling out loudly, “Lads, I have an anno—where is everyone?”

You hear Beck scoff from somewhere nearby. “It’s four in the damn morning,” he says. “Probably sleeping.”

“Ah. Right.” A brief pause, and then Shanks goes on, so happily you can practically hear him grinning, “I’m going to be a dad.”

“Yeah,” says Beck. “Congratulations. Now maybe go put on some damned pants.”

“…Right.”

Mihawk

You already know he isn’t going to be happy. After your first missed period, you mentioned children. Merely in passing.

And he had immediately expressed his gratitude that there would never be any of the vile creatures roaming the halls of his castle.

Another three weeks, and you don’t have a choice but to bring it up. You’re losing sleep over it and he’s noticed, because of course he’s noticed. Mihawk doesn’t seem to miss anything, where you’re concerned—except perhaps this, which he seems to have not one single suspicion of.

You lay back on a plush sofa in one of the dens, your head resting in his lap as he sips a cup of coffee and flips through the newspaper, your eyes barely open. All you want to do is sleep. You’ve barely slept in a damned week, his words haunting you every time you do, his potential reaction to this upheaval of the peaceful existence you have both lived at his castle for the past several months.

“It’s likely because you’ve stopped having a glass of wine before bed,” he says, and you sigh to yourself. You had outright lied on that account, told him that for no reason you could discern you were suddenly getting horrible headaches any time you consumed even a drop of alcohol. “It’s been almost two months, you could try again.”

“N…no,” you say. “I can’t.”

He lifts the newspaper and glances down at you, lifting his eyebrows—waiting for you to elaborate. It’s now or never. You pull yourself up, drawing up every ounce of resolve in your body to meet his eyes as he looks at you in growing perplexity, his sharp eyes darting briefly down from your gaze as you bite your bottom lip lightly.

“I…can’t because…” You’re already feeling lightheaded, already reeling from the threat of what may come to pass. “Because I’m pregnant.”

His eyes remain locked onto yours for several tense seconds. He slowly folds down his newspaper and sets it aside on the end table. Slowly, gently as if you’re made of porcelain, he moves a hand down to your shoulder and lightly pushes you up into a sitting position. He opens his mouth, lifting his hand as if about to speak…and closes it again.

He tries once more, and words seem to fail him yet again.

And then he stands from the couch abruptly, without a word, and strides out of the room.

You’re fairly sure you know where he’s headed. You pull in a slow, deep breath, steeling your nerves to the best of your ability, before your rise to follow him. Surely enough, as you expected, you find him in the kitchen, pulling the cork out of a half-full bottle of wine. He glances briefly over his shoulder as you enter.

“How did this happen?” His tone is level, but you notice how he fills his wine glass nearly to the rim.

“Well, you see, when a man and a woman—” The glare he levels upon you shares none of your attempted humor, so you just sigh, leaning back against the kitchen island and crossing your arms. “Probably after that warlord meeting a couple months ago?”

“…Ah.”

That’s all he says on that matter—there isn’t much else to say. Whatever had happened at the meeting was a mystery to you, but it evidently had gone very poorly and been an absolute waste of his time, as he had returned to Kuraigana Island that evening in a bit of a foul mood and set immediately to downing two and a half bottles of wine. You had joined him in the endeavor, and the rest of the night was more than a bit of a blur. You only really knew that you both woke up on a couch rather than your bed the following morning, that you yourself could barely walk from the stiffness in your thighs, and that you had both bickered lightly through your shared hangover about who was going to get up to make coffee, before both giving up and going back to sleep for more than half the day.

“Well. This is…”

He doesn’t seem to be quite sure what it is, so he takes a sip from his overfull wine glass instead, leaning back against the counter opposite you, staring at the wall but clearly not actually seeing it. His eyes are far away, unfocused.

“…unexpected,” he finishes finally.

And takes another sip of wine.

“Mmhmm,” you hum in agreement, both your hands gripping at the counter behind you. You pull yourself up to sit there, your gaze glued to him, carefully studying his face for any sign of emotion, any reaction, but there’s nothing—just that blank, miles away stare. “S…so…what do you…what should we…” His eyes shift over to you, but only briefly, before shifting down to his wine glass.

“I…” He cringes slightly before going on, as if the admission physically pains him, “…don’t know.”

You know there are two things that Mihawk hates above all else in life—unexpected news, and a lack of control. Right now, experiencing both at once in tremendous measure, you can almost see the thin thread of his patience beginning to fray, and you aren’t sure what might happen when it breaks.

You swallow nervously, lowering your eyes when his gaze shifts over to you again.

You hear him sigh in resignation.

“We’ll need to find a doctor immediately to be sure,” he says curtly, and you give a stiff nod in agreement, glancing up at him. He’s staring down at his wine glass again, and continues to do so in silence for several long, tense seconds.

“You’re angry,” you say quietly. He sighs again, shaking his head, and sets the glass on the counter behind him. Your eyes fall to your knees once more as he crosses the kitchen toward you, and shift over to your hand when he rests his over it.

“Not with you,” he says lightly. There’s something different about his tone, but it isn’t anger. It almost frightens you more when you recognize it as uncertainty. You’ve never seen him uncertain about anything.

He pulls your hand lightly, and you slip off of the counter and onto your feet, sighing slowly yourself as he tugs you back against him, his arm curling around your waist. He brushes your hair behind your ear, behind your shoulder, and your eyes slip shut as his lips graze your neck. “I’m not sure if I possess the skillset necessary to be a very…adept parent,” he murmurs.

You can’t help but chuckle a little at that, relaxing back against him as his lips brush your neck again, a silent reassurance that he genuinely isn’t upset with you. “I’m sure you’ll do fine.” You rest one of your hands over his at your waist; and you bring your other up, curling your fingers in his hair near his temple. “I can hear it now,” you say airily, smirking a little, and you go on in a mimicry of his dry, deadpan tone, “’Now, now, we’ve already established Daddy’s cross necklace is not a toy.” You giggle at his irritated sigh, as he pulls his arm tighter around your waist.

“Then again,” he says, “I do have to deal with you being a brat every day and I’ve yet to murder you.”

“See?” You pat his cheek lightly, and he grabs your hand to stop you. “Good practice.” You lean to the side a bit and turn your head, smirking at the wry look he gives you, and pressing your lips to his lightly for a moment. He exhales a slow sigh as your lips part, tilting his head forward until your foreheads touch. “We’ll figure it out,” you murmur softly.

“Yes…” His fingers lace through yours. “I suppose we will.”

[cyyfics]

I LOVED your Simon headcannons!!! Could I request gender neutral reader giving Simon a Blowjob? I just generally imagine him all whiny and needy. Like he gets an involuntary erection and the reader helps him out <33

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Accidents Happen

Pairing: !Simon Petrikov x GN! reader

C! Warning(s): NSFW!, blowjobs, overstimulation, hair pulling, something else idk how to describe??? Like ur like idk, sort of spit/saliva kink, gagging, throat fucking sort of, sort of choking tbh

Synopsis: you and your best friend Simon were just lounging around on the couch on a hot summers day, who knew it would end like this?

Pronoun stuff: ur genitals aren’t mentioned like at all except for maybe one line and it’s pretty gender neutral

Note: ur the one being more dominant and harsh to him in this story, just letting u guys know Cus like ik some ppl don’t like top! readers ???

Also sorry for the Wattpad words 😨

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Your day started out like normal, you were simply lying in bed with your leg draped off the side lazily; that was until you got a knock on your door. Planning to stay lazy, you stayed in bed for a little longer not planning to get up. ‘If it’s really that important, they’ll find a way to get to me..’ you thought to yourself as you neglected the person at the door.

“Y/n!” You perked up as you heard your name being called, the sound of a familiar voice ringing through your head “shit, it’s Simon!” You scrambled to get up from your cozy bed to go help him at the door. Your footsteps were heard from outside the house at how fast you were running down the hallway, Simon stared at your front door with a bead of sweat upon his eyebrow as he heard you coming.

Finally, you had opened up the door for him. He was standing there with one of his arms sheepishly rubbing at his elbow, “Simon! What’re you doing here? Not that I mind, but I thought you would’ve texted first..” you crossed your arms and squinted at him. “I’m sorry, it’s just that I was in the area and thought about seeing you.” Simon apologised, the sentence actually sounding pretty sweet to you. “You’re drenched in sweat, did you run here or something?” You chuckled to yourself a little as you looked him up and down.

“No. Just walked. The heat is horrible out there.” Simon huffed and leaned against the wall, you cocked an eyebrow at him “You sure you’re not just exaggerating? I know your body temperature hasn’t been the same since ic-“ Simon cuts you off. He doesn’t wanna hear the name, doesn’t wanna remember any of that. “No. It really is hot out there. I saw a candy girl and she was literally melting!” Simon exclaimed.

You found it kinda cute, but not in a weird way, you told yourself. “You can sit in front of the fan if you want, just turn it on over there.” You pointed towards the fan that was set up in the corner of your living room “..Why do you have a fan out here?” Simon irked at you “..Because it gets hot in the living room? Duh.” You furrowed your eyebrows at him and gave a weird look. “..Right then.” Simon switched the fan on and immediately started to lay down on your couch.

“Oh, and now you’re just stealing my couch. How thoughtful.” You walked over to join him and found that he had left you little room to sit down, “Yes I am actually quite thoughtful- thank you for seeing that prince/ss” Simon chuckled to himself before moving a bit on the couch. “That’s still not leaving me a lot of room, Simon.” You deadpanned at him “Come lay on me then, I don’t mind.” He invited you over to him. It wouldn’t be weird, you told yourself, you and him had cuddled or laid with each other before, it’s what best friends do.

You hesitantly crawled up to him on the couch, resting your head on his shoulder awkwardly. “Isn’t this only gonna make you feel more hot?” You asked him “Probably.” Simon didn’t really care though since he had the fan turned on him. As you laid there on top of him, Simon moved one of his arms to wrap around you- to make sure you don’t suddenly fall off the couch or something, obviously..

The TV was switched on and before long the two of you were watching bad movies and junk. It was like any other day, that’s how it started. The two of you would always just be hanging out doing random things, sometimes it’d be things even like just standing in the same room together. You two just enjoyed each other’s presence. “Oh, this is a boring movie. I preferred the book much better.” Simon giggled into his hand, you couldn’t help smiling and giggling back at him.

Just as the two of you became engulfed in whatever garbage you were watching, you suddenly felt the air in the room go stagnant. Something was off, and you didn’t exactly know what yet. That was until you felt something ‘weird’ and ‘foreign’ pressing up against your lower back, you weren’t sure what it was at first but you got an idea when you moved your hips back a little and felt Simon tense up. You stayed still for a bit, seeing if he was going to say anything, possibly something like ‘Y/n don’t do that that’s my crotch’ or ‘I’m sorry that I’ve accidentally got a boner let’s just ignore it’

He said nothing, and neither did you. But you were ever so curious to find out if he would eventually say something, to confirm your theory you had to test it. You ground your hips back against his front, making the man involuntarily twitch for just a moment. You didn’t miss it, with the way his arm around you tensed up. “Something wrong?” You turned over your shoulder to ask him, looking up at his now slightly flustered face “N-No, why would something be wrong? Nothings wrong.” Simon stammered out.

“Oh, okay then.” You turn your head away to focus back on the TV but just as you do you feel his hand that was holding your side slightly grip you a little tighter, sending this tingling sensation down your body. You still didn’t dare say anything, wondering where this may be leading to. Simon pulled you a little closer to him, you were flush against him, he tried to do it slowly in hopes maybe you wouldn’t notice but you did. “Simon.” You spoke ��Hm?” He tried to act as if he had no idea that you knew what he was doing.

“Why did you-“ he cuts you off “Why did I what?” You furrow your eyebrows at him “pull me closer.” You finish “I didn’t do that.” He lies to you, and yet his fingers grasp onto the fabric of your shirt to hold you a little tighter. You roll your eyes at him, simply deciding to mess with him now at this point. You shifted in your place a bit, your ass now rubbing right against his hard on. It’s a little more obvious now what you’re doing, and Simon ends up realising that just as he releases a soft moan.

The sound reaches your ears, making your cheeks flush. You weren’t expecting a moan, nor one this cute. You tease up a little, turning your head to look up at his face- which was already looking down at you with a slight annoyance. Yet, he had the most adorable flustered looking face you’d ever seen. “Y/n!” Simon exclaims “yeeeeesssss?” You draw it out, you weren’t worried about him being upset with you since you knew the man and that he wasn’t actually mad or upset. “Are you doing that on purpose?” He narrows his eyes at you “doing what?” You bat your eyelashes at him innocently.

“You know what.” Simon spits flusteredly, his cheeks a bright red colour. “Do I?” You turn your head back around, moving your hips against him again. “So you are!” Simon squeals in embarrassment “you are doing this on purpose!” Simon huffs “No clue what you’re talking about Simon.” You pretend to yawn “Right. So you aren’t rubbing your butt up against me on purpose?” Simon deadpanned at you “Where would you get such an idea?” You asked him trying not to laugh.

“From this.” He gently moves you off of him a little and shows you the growing erection showing through his pants, from what you could see he already looked pretty big actually. You looked down at him with widened eyes, licking your lips that had suddenly become dry, still trying to tell yourself that you only see this man as a friend. “Christ, Looks painful.” You swore under your breath, feeling suddenly sorry for this poor man.

“It is.” His cock was strained against his tightened pants, begging to be freed. “And you’re telling me, I did that?” Your tone switched up at the end there which told him that you weren’t innocent at all, not that he thought you were. “.. yes, I guess you did!” Simon turned his head away from you in annoyance. You didn’t say a word, only turning over to face him now. Your hand slowly slid down to find its way to his clothed erection, stroking him gently with your fingertips.

“Y-Y/n!” Simon gasped softly as you touched him, your hand brushing up against his aching cock. “Yeah? What’s up, Simon? What’s wrong?” You asked him ‘innocently’ even as your hand kept stroking at his clothed dick “you’re touching my-“ he gulped nervously. “This okay?” You cut him off to ask him “yes.” Simon replied a little quickly. Simon was panting under your touch now, trying to fight his urges as his hips slowly grind themselves up against your hand.

“Get it out for me, please.”

Simon didn’t hesitate as he started to undo his belt, pulling it off and throwing it to the floor. He then unbuttoned his pants, zipped them down, and tugged them down to his thighs. He then slid his underwear down enough to reveal his length “fuck..” you muttered out quietly as you eyed his erection in its full glory. He was actually surprisingly long, and he was curved. “What’re you gonn-“ Simon bit back his words as he felt you suddenly move your head down to kiss at his tip.

Simon loved it, he couldn’t lie. His eyes were watching you with such content and desire, he could watch you sit and kiss his cock all day. (Not really, if you did that he’d probably get super overstimulated and cum all over your lips and face.) You slowly parted your lips, letting your tongue drag along his slit before moving your head and licking a long line down his shaft. “A-ah..” Simon whined out as you started to lick at him, teasing him before you got to the main bit.

In all honesty Simon could’ve came right then and there, because just seeing you like that in a lewd state made his mind start reeling. Simon whined impatiently, covering his mouth with a hand, his hips jerking up against your touch. You took that as a sign and opened your mouth, wrapping your lips around him as you took him down your throat. There was a slight sting as you felt him take up the room down your throat, making it hard for you to breathe at all. You still tried your best though, moving your head up and down along his cock.

Simon couldn’t stop his greedy self, his hips grinding up against your face, one of his hands grabbing at your hair gently. He wasn’t pulling you or anything, only tangling his fingers in your hair as you sucked him dry. Your mouth was filling up with saliva as you took him down your throat, You don’t stop sucking him off though, instead letting a bit of saliva dribble down your chin. Simon was covered in your spit too, a bit of it starting to cover his thighs. It was a hot sight to see actually.

Simon moaned loudly, his hand that was tangled in your hair now grabbing it slightly tighter. You kept going, your tongue resting against the bottom of your mouth as he basically face fucked you. His hips were grinding against your face and his hand in your hair was slightly pushing you down against him too. It wasn’t long before he ended up cumming, hot bitter liquid pooling down your throat.

You had to swallow it, not sure you could even spit it up with the way it naturally sunk down your throat. Simon pulled out slowly, your tongue sticking out a little still covered in a bit of his cum. You put your tongue back into your mouth and swallowed it, the sight was a real pretty thing to see. Simon now felt a bit exhausted, panting as he laid back on the couch. You giggled at his cute mannerisms, before leaning back down and kissing at the head of his dick to overstimulate him.

It was just to tease him though, wanting to see more of his cute faces. Simon clenched his eyes and used a hand over his mouth to muffle a loud moan that had escaped him. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop.” You gave him mercy and sat up, allowing him to put himself away. “T-That felt really.. good” Simon admitted.

“I liked it too.”

[my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction]

Hi Fen! Hope you're doing well <3

I've been having such a hard time going to sleep lately and I was wondering if the moon boys ever have that problem - when they're not trying to stay up that is. So what do you think? Do any of them have trouble falling asleep? What do they do when that happens? And how do you think they'd help a Reader who couldn't fall asleep?

I’m so sorry you’re having trouble sleeping! (And that it’s taken me so long to reply) I hope you're doing better now <3

Rating: PG  Masterlist | ao3 | want to be tagged?

Warnings: brief mention to sex

Steven

Doesn’t have trouble sleeping, and can go to sleep quite easily when he’s not fighting it AND when Marc isn’t co-fronting (Marc’s sleeping issues bleed over into Steven).

When you can’t sleep though Steven is more than happy to stay up with you.

“Spend most of my adult life on 2 hours of sleep a day, didn't I? Yes. So this isn’t even water off a duck’s back, this is air off a duck’s back, this is not even noticeable love.” 

Will suggest lots of different things to do: reading (he will read to you if you want to try to sleep), watch something, listen to music, go on a weird London at 3:30am walk, “the night tube is running and we could go to 24 hour karaoke in Soho?”, “did you know these libraries are open at 4am?”, “I know a 24 gym that has a pool, we could go swimming!”, “Beckenham Place Park actually has open water swimming, I bet we’d be the only ones there! But I’m gonna wear a nose clip because I don’t want possible brain-eating amoeba up my nose, do I? No.” Proceeds to tell you a documentary's worth of information about Naegleria fowleri and how it was found in 1978 in Bath, so “yes it is in the UK Marc.”

Basically he’s full of ideas about where to go in the middle of the night that’s open because that’s what he used to do when he was trying not to sleep. (Also it’s nice to do things when there’s not so many people about.) 

Will suggest driving to a spot he knows outside of London where there’s less light pollution to look at the stars. Will wake up Jake to do the driving. Will bully the hell out of Khonshu if the sky isn’t clear. (And will make him get rid of the cloud.) 

100% would ask if you would like him to fuck you to sleep.

Marc

He’s not asleep either. 

Usually gets Steven or Jake to fall asleep for him.

However, if they’re already asleep, or not available, he goes with the ‘I am laying down with my eyes closed, because it’s still resting’ philosophy. 

He tries not to toss and turn a lot, but he does bless him. 

Has tried to drink himself to sleep on several occasions. 

Doesn’t like to see you having trouble sleeping at all and spends ages fussing over you. 

Fluffs the pillows, gets extra blankets, gets less blankets, turns the heating on, gets the fan out, will run you a bath and put all the lavender stuff in and make you 500 herbal teas, then change the bed covers. 

Will offer to sleep on the sofa or the floor so he doesn’t disturb you while you’re trying to sleep. (Then apologies when you obviously hate the idea of him being away from you.)

Is giving ALL the cuddles, however you want them. Will lay in the most uncomfortable position for himself for you to be comfy (will not tell you the position is uncomfortable for him.)

Tells you the most outrageously made up stories in quiet hushed tones to help lull you to sleep and then acts mock offended if you doubt that anything he says didn’t really happen.

Makes you cum on his mouth repeatedly until you’re so exhausted you have no choice but to fall asleep.

Jake

Can actually fall asleep anywhere at any time. 

I still firmly believe that before Steven and Marc know about him he would front just to go to sleep because they are so bad at getting some shut eye and constantly run the body into the ground.

Has melatonin tablets and a whole pharmacy's worth of sleeping aids to share. 

Will 100% take you for a drive to try to get you to fall asleep (or just to take you somewhere if you want, or if Steven has woken him up to drive.)

“Jake, I need you to drive to-”

“Steven… It's bedtime, time for sleep. No driving.”

“Oh, but S/O is having trouble sleeping and-”

Jake is already out of bed with his car keys in hand.

Will offer to be your weighted blanket and lay all over you. 

Says he will threaten Khonshu to keep the sun down so you can rest if it takes you a while to get to sleep. 

Tries to (lovingly) bore you to sleep by counting sheep out loud and in detail. “This one is a Merino sheep, the ones that are very fluffy. Her name is Harold. She likes grass, but not clover. Which is unusual for a sheep. So that’s one so far, one sheep. Now this next one is…”

Doesn’t offer sexy times because he doesn’t want to be pushy, however if you suggest it he’s happily all over you.

____________________________________

Thank you for reading!

@raven-rk @campingwiththecharmings @alexxavicry @mystinky-butt @cocodiem @oscarisaacsspit @whatthefishh @mbakubabe @romanarose @pimosworld @jake-g-lockley @saturn-rings-writes @boredzillenial @lonelyisamyw-0love @melodygatesauthor @steven-grants-world  @eyelessfaces @angel-of-the-moons @minigirl87 @queerponcho

If you'd like to be taken off the tag list please let me know here

[williamrikers]

On the subject of consent in recent BLs

In this analysis, I will take a look at several love scenes in recent Thai BLs, how they frame consent and the sexual agency of the characters, and why those matter.

(KinnPorsche deserves its own post: I’m sure people have already written in detail about how much emphasis is placed on issues of consent/non-consent throughout the show and how fundamental consent is to the relationship arcs of both KinnPorsche and VegasPete, and I won’t belabor the point here. Also, special shout-out to The Warp Effect for what it brought to the conversation about gay sex, but TWE isn’t technically a BL so I decided not to include it in this analysis.)

I am going to take a closer look at the following shows in this essay: Not Me, The Eclipse, A Boss And A Babe, Step By Step, and La Pluie.

Not Me and The Eclipse predate the other shows by two years/one year respectively, but I feel it is valuable to include them here because both show very explicit negotiations of consent that I feel are spiritual successors to the wonderful scenes we’ve been getting in the other three shows.

Why am I even writing this? There used to be an unfortunate tendency in the genre to have a power imbalance between the “seme” and the “uke” character, which translated into the seme deciding when to have sex and what kind of sex to have—and even though recently, several shows have done good work in dismantling the seme/uke dynamic and questioning the associated stereotypes, it cannot be denied that the archetypes are still an important part of most BLs, and even in cases where the tropes are played with and questioned, understanding those subversions still requires a knowledge of and familiarity with the original tropes on the part of the audience.

However, gone are the days of Until We Meet Again and Dean’s “I’ve waited long enough, make sure you’re ready.” (I enjoyed UWMA a lot but that was. Yeah. Not Great.) Now, we see characters actually talking about and negotiating their limits, and doing what feels good to them.

Let’s start from the very beginning. Not Me was an absolute trailblazer in this regard, and not mentioning it here would be a gross oversight. The first time Sean and White have sex, it happens in their version of the beach episode. (Which, in Not Me, is the two characters briefly living in a tent inside an abandoned building. This show is the best.) Sean and White are removed from their usual environment and protected from the outside world by two barriers: the walls of the old house and the tent that’s literally enveloping them and giving them a space that is unequivocally theirs, shared, in which neither one of the characters has any sort of power over the other. And what happens in that space when they’re about to have sex is extremely interesting: the first thing Sean asks is whether White is afraid of him, which White denies. The following exchange goes like this: White: "So, what are we doing?" Sean: "What should I do to you?" White: "That’s up to you." (Watch the whole scene here.)

I find this exchange incredibly meaningful because this already turns the seme/uke dynamic that can be found in a lot of other shows on its head. OffGun as a branded pair can easily be stereotyped into the seme/uke dynamic just because of their physical appearances, and clearly spelling out that both characters have agency in this scene is incredibly important.

And then it gets better! Sean assumes that White is sexually inexperienced (which is not true but the fact that White was actually in a relationship with a woman back in Russia never comes up again after the pilot episode, so maybe the show expects us to assume this, too), and suggests they try different things and White can tell him what he likes and doesn’t like. Compared to the stuff we’re getting now, this scene isn’t very high heat at all, but it’s one of my favorite intimate scenes ever because them asking each other “Do you like this?” after every kiss, every touch, is so incredibly unique and transports a wonderful sense of figuring out sexual pleasure together, as a couple.

Sex in Not Me is not something one character does to another, it is something that is discovered and shared together, and we even get an afterglow scene in which they gently tease each other about their fast beating hearts. (And don’t get me started on the importance of White choosing to ask Sean whether Sean is okay with White not being like Black in that moment right before they have sex, because he doesn’t actually want to have sex with Sean as Black! He wants to discover and share intimacy with Sean as White, as himself, not as his brother! The layers!)

Anyway, I think that scene paved the way for a lot of the conversations around consent we’re now getting in BL, just because it is so explicitly, unashamedly putting forward a definition of sexuality that has nothing to do with one character actively giving and the other passively receiving, but frames intimacy as something that is built together. (More on giving and receiving later!)

Now, moving on to The Eclipse. I decided to include the first time Akk and Aye have sex for a different reason: while we don’t really see them actually talking about consent, we see them practicing non-verbal consent. Let me explain. Akk’s and Aye’s whole thing is teasing each other. At first, Aye is usually the one doing the teasing, but Akk gets the hang of it towards the end of the show and teases his boyfriend right back. When they’re in Akk’s childhood bedroom together, Aye clearly alludes to the fact that he thought they might use this opportunity to have sex for the first time, which Akk pretends not to understand, all while alluding to it himself. I love this guy. (Watch the whole scene here.) Anyway, Akk says he wants to sleep, lies down and once again, tells Aye jokingly he just wants to sleep, clearly expecting Aye to do what other BL protagonists do at that point and not take no for an answer (sidenote: I HATE the “saying no as foreplay” trope with a passion and as far as I’m concerned it should die already).

However, Aye is not like other BL love interests, and he backs off. He stops touching Akk, lies down with his back to Akk, showing Akk that he takes him by his word: if Akk says he wants to sleep, Aye is going to let him do just that. So now, it’s on Akk to say that, no, that’s not what he meant, can Aye please come back to cuddle. And then Akk is the one to escalate from cuddling to kissing, which is extremely important: we know that Aye has been ready to have sex with Akk since forever, it’s Akk who’s been having hangups about intimacy this whole time.

They don’t put consent into so many words on this show, but Aye shows Akk that he respects his limits and that Akk only has to tell him he doesn’t want to do something and Aye will take him at his word.

So, these are, to me, two foundational scenes of establishing consent: one that shows consent as something that is established verbally, as an ongoing conversation, and one that shows consent as something that is established physically, by showing your partner that you respect their choices and limits by way of simply acting accordingly.

Now, let’s get into the fun part: scenes we got so far in 2023. I’m writing this post on the 13th of June, and I’m sure this year still has some great things in store for us, especially because Step By Step and La Pluie are both ongoing and neither of the main couples are actually together yet at time of writing. However, they’ve both already given us AMAZING scenes on the topic of consent, so I feel it is worthwhile to write about those already.

I want to start off by talking about A Boss And A Babe.

Let me just preface this by saying that the intimate scenes in ABAAB are some of my all time favorites in BL ever, because in them, sex is something that is just so normal. When Gun and Cher have sex, we don’t see them very passionate, excited, reluctant or wide-eyed innocent (which are some of the emotions traditionally associated with sex in BL). On the contrary, in every single scene that shows them being intimate, both characters are incredibly calm. They’re certainly happy to be with each other, but in a subdued way. Someone described their second intimate scene as them seeming like they’ve been married for a few years. They’re both just… incredibly normal about having sex with each other. It’s simply something they like to do together. It’s a part of their romance but it’s not more or less important than any other aspects of their lives.

And consent is at the very heart of it.

When Gun and Cher have their first time, we see Gun explicitly asking for consent two times: first, “Can I kiss you?”, then, “Can I do more?” The second one even comes with the promise that if Cher says no, Gun will immediately go to sleep without mentioning it again. And then it is on Cher to say yes, to pull Gun close and kiss him to show him that he is comfortable with taking things further. (In the show, these two questions were shown apart from each other, I cut together a version of the whole First Time Scene in its entirety, watch it here.)

Now, things get more interesting: the second intimate scene shows Cher initiating the encounter (watch the whole scene here). Cher pretty consistently falls into the uke category, both physically and as far as characterization is concerned, but he’s certainly not shy in the bedroom. And this time, he’s the one who asks for consent from Gun: Gun asks “You’re starting it?” and Cher’s response is “Can I?” Despite him being framed physically lower than Gun, basically at Gun’s mercy, he still seeks confirmation that Gun is okay with the way things are going. Not to overstate it, but to me, this feels revolutionary. Once again, we’re being shown that sex is something two people do together, as a shared activity, and that the “seme” character isn’t expected to just be up for it. He, too, has the right to say no.

On this show, sexual agency is taken extremely seriously, and it is clear that both Gun and Cher give each other space to decide what they’re comfortable doing. This is shown in non-intimate scenes as well: there are so many moments on ABAAB in which the characters negotiate physical touch and closeness, asking each other for hugs before actually hugging each other, Cher leaning on Gun’s shoulder in the car but not allowing Gun to touch him because that’s not what he’s comfortable with in that moment, and so on. (The only exception to this otherwise pretty consistent rule is the kiss in the car scene, which I’m still extremely confused about because it seems to go completely against Gun’s character. Who knows what happened there.)

Of course, the fact that so much emphasis is placed on negotiation and consent isn’t surprising on a show that has such obvious kink undertones and whose Our Skyy 2 entry basically consisted entirely of Dom/sub roleplay at work—I’m just saying, I think someone on the writing team is way into BDSM and knows all about the importance of enthusiastic consent from all parties involved, and I would like to send them flowers.

Step By Step hasn’t really reached the point where we can analyse the dynamic between the main couple (although we can take some educated guesses based on the interactions we’ve seen so far). However, last week’s episode had an extremely important scene between Pat and Put: Pat wanting to have sex with Put, then changing his mind mid make-out (watch the whole scene here). I really like the way this scene was done. No matter how shitty Put treats Pat at times, in this instance, he immediately understood and respected Pat’s change of mind without Pat even saying or explaining anything—at the end of the episode, Put says to Pat that Pat should tell Put when he feels ready to have sex. (We already know this will never happen because of course, Pat and Put are not endgame, but I do appreciate the sentiment.)

BLs rarely include a whole storyline in which the protagonist is in an actual, serious romantic relationship with someone other than his endgame love interest (hi Moonlight Chicken!), or if they do then just to up the angst factor. In this case, however, I feel that this scene raises our expectations for Jeng even further: if the guy who is definitely not a romantic match for Pat treats Pat with this much respect in the bedroom, then Jeng has to do at least that and then some. I do feel confident that Jeng won’t disappoint in this regard, but it’s fascinating to see a show frame this kind of respect as the absolute baseline minimum, with the endgame love interest expected to do even better.

Now, the one you’ve all been waiting for. The one that made me write this whole essay in the first place: La Pluie.

Oh boy. Where to start.

A week ago, we got an incredible make-out scene on Saengtai’s floor, which ended in Patts stopping the encounter because he could tell Tai wasn’t really comfortable taking things further—@bengiyo talked about that scene in detail here. And then, three days ago, La Pluie gave us the most unique, trope-defying, timeline-changing blowjob scene of all time, and I want to talk about it.

Tai and Patts are making out on their bed, Tai is not ready to go “all the way” and stops Patts from undressing him. We see a very realistic frustrated reaction from Patts, who nevertheless immediately stops and accepts Tai’s wishes—it is clear that Patts does not expect things to go any further at this point, and that he won’t pressure Tai into anything.

And then, Tai offers to blow him.

(Unfortunately, this show is only on iQiyi so I can't link to it, but you can get a good impression of the scene here.)

I mentioned the concepts of giving and receiving earlier: other people have said this more eloquently than me, but there is a tendency not only in BL but also in wider society to view sex in terms of giving and receiving, with a lot of expectations and stereotypes attached to the roles during different sexual acts. On other shows, that blowjob might be framed as a consolidation or an apology, something that the giver does out of a sense of obligation without enjoying it much. Not so on La Pluie! Tai is shown incredibly happy and satisfied afterwards, both when they’re sleeping next to each other, as well as on the morning after (see also @ginnymoonbeam's post about that here). Tai offered to blow Patts because he simply wanted to, not motivated by guilt or anything of that sort. And he genuinely enjoyed it! In the post I linked above, @bengiyo points out that La Pluie consistently centers queer desire, or more specifically in this case, male desire for a male body; much in the same way that the camera fucking loves Force’s body on ABAAB: the sensuality of the skin, the hands, the abs, the flat chests, the broad backs and shoulders of these men is explicitly emphasized, and Tai’s desire for a dick in his mouth is made absolutely crystal-clear. Of course, since this is a TV show and not a porno, we only see Patts’s thumb in Tai’s mouth instead of his dick, but the imagery, the implications, are clear as day.

And it is such a gentle framing, too: Patts caresses Tai’s lip lovingly, Tai opens his mouth slowly, seductively, then faces Patts’s crotch with a soft look on his face. We do get a clear sense of this encounter as tender, and gentle, and most of all, desired. Tai’s queer desire is at the heart of this scene, and at the heart of the afterglow scene as well. He wanted this man’s dick in his mouth, openly suggested it, showed Patts he was sure about his decision after Patts asked him whether he was, and ended up clearly happy and satisfied with the sex they had. This post, also by @bengiyo, goes into more detail on that.

This, once again, shows us sex as a conversation rather than a series of predetermined acts, shows us sex as a shared activity, as something that can be wonderful and intimate and make people happy without following what society views as “the correct steps”. I think this is extremely important because one part of queer identity is figuring out one’s own relationship to sexuality, one’s own desires and needs, and BLs that ignore this aspect fall a little short in my opinion. Sure, those men are kissing, but do they experience queer desire? Do they experience joy in their queer desire?

For me personally, a show that does not shy away from these questions is a lot more meaningful than a show that does, and consent is at the heart of it all. By framing sex as a conversation, as something that is built and shared together, the shows I looked at here are actively positioning themselves against the idea that there should be predetermined roles for partners during sex, and instead suggest that queer joy can be found in communication and consent. Understanding sex and intimacy as something that is built together, with both partners as equals in conversation, is just as radically queer as a man waking up with a smile on his face after giving his soulmate a blowjob the previous night.

And quite honestly, a male character who clearly, passionately, unquestioningly communicates that he wants a dick inside of him—that is incredibly sexy. But maybe that’s just me.

[tohot4u]

It had been a long-dreary type of day. Odd, with skies of gray, making the world feel a shade off from its usual vibrancy.  It was slow, with people sluggishly getting up from their beds and heading to work with heavy heads-

This dreary day just so happened to be a Thursday. Of nothing particularly spectacular. And with the kid off doing deliveries.( which were,of course, were not actually getting delivered.)  The Great Sage equal to heaven itself found himself in a rather dreary slump. 

He had no motivation to move from his spot on the tree. His limbs dropping down, his face smashed against the wood. Tail hanging loosely as he stared into the barely dipping sun. It’s pale glow barely enough to generate enough heat to chase the coldness of the tree shadows.  

 With nothing to do, with no comfort, and a painful ache in his bones. He found himself lost in the spiral of his thoughts. His mind recalling a brief encounter with the blue guy-what was his name?-ah Sandy! 

‘" Well, writing down what you're grateful for is start!”  

“Uh-bud as an immortal I might need more than just a regular ol’ paper…”  

Sandy placed his tea cup down, straightening his back. 

“You don’t have to write everything down-just the really important stuff. The type of things that you hold really close to the heart-or even people. Think of a bigger scope.” 

“People huh…” 

“Although, I heard you can feel a lot better when you say what you're grateful for-to that person face to face.” 

“Not sure that's really…possible bud…hah. Afraid they're all-well..” 

“ I can think of one person, Monkey King.”  ‘ 

He clenched his fists, well tried, yet he couldn’t seem to muster anger-as much as it brought a wave of depression. 

Isn't it worth a try? 

You can barely lift yourself up!

It will only end in disaster….

You don’t have anything better to do. 

….

It never took long to find Macaque. 

Sprawled lazily in his dojo, a sketchbook in hand.  Humming the theme to Monkey cop-which of course he found hilarious. And almost like the other could hear  his utter amusement, Macaque's eyes snapped to him. His eyes glowing as dimly as the gray sun through the fogged windows. 

Wukong tripped, pushing the window open and falling through. Landing on the ground with a crash,a crater in the middle of the dojo floor.

“Ah-um YOU saw nothing!” 

Macaque crossed his arms, stepping away from the sage’s destruction.

“Uh-uh-and what are you doing here?” 

He cleared his throat,dusting himself off as the nervous jitters creeped up his tail. The feeling of eyes on him, gazing deep into his soul, judging his every move. 

Don’t get stage fright now! This isn’t even a stage! 

“Of the things I am thankful for, I am thankful for you.” 

“Wha-what-what are you-?” 

He stepped forward, Macaque stepping back. 

“I am thankful for the moments we spent together,and I am thankful…for all the moments we will spend together.” 

“I-shut-what the-!?”  

He stepped forward, Macaque stepping back once more. 

“I am thankful that you-despite everything-stayed.” 

“I-but I-I didn’t-“ 

“You always came back,one way or another, even in…undesirable conditions. Even when I-when I-hurt you,” 

Macaque stays silent 

“I killed you Macaque.” 

Macaque looks away,his body pressed up against the door. 

“I’m thankful…that you loved me, and I know I never deserved it.”  

Macaque rushed outside, swinging the door open with force.  

“And I’m sorry,that I can’t stop loving you.”

This, Macaque pauses at, eyes wet and shimmering as the world seems to explode in vibrant hues of the sunset.  

…

He still runs away

[gh0stsp1d3r]

👀 Maybe a fluffy “meet-cute” Kraven x fem reader..

Like she’s a veterinarian who helps animals that were rescued from Poachers.. she’s also a mutant with Deadpool level healing and animal like reflexes.. (and is actively Jealous of kraven for his bound and understanding of animals.. she would seriously pout like a child if he flaunted it infront of her)

she’s very kind and soft spoken when you first meet her.. However won’t hesitate to calmly explain how she’ll disembowel a man if she’s pissed off.. not threaten.. explain, she’s doing it.

Kraven is… intrigued you could say.. 😏

The forest

Love it!!!!

You walked along the quiet trail. The birds singing and flowers moving with the wind.

You smiled at the peace and the quiet. Then you stumbled upon something as you continued to walk.

A bird laying down, chirping in pain, as it’s wing hung low. You stopped and crouched down.

You frowned at it and looked at its wings.

“Poor thing…” you mumbled, and slowly picked it up.

You looked around for something to wrap it in, you then thought about your scarf. You took it off and wrapped it around the bird.

“Might have to keep you for a while, little guy.” You mumbled, and pet his head.

Sergei was also on a walk, clearing his head. He stopped when he saw someone crouched down, holding a bird wrapped in a scarf. You.

He came up to you, you seemed a bit lost.

“Hi.” He said, waving as you turned around to him.

You smiled at him “Hi! Uh- would you happen to know the quickest way out..? Saw this little guy and I couldn’t just leave him. Just a little confused on directions..”

“Broken wing, huh?” He said. You looked in confusion and slowly nodded.

“Uh.. yeah. Yup. Cute little guy.” You laughed quietly.

He stared at you for a moment. He stared at your eyes, and your lips. You were beautiful, and he almost forgot about what you asked.

“So uh.. directions?”

“Yeah. It’s uh.. this way- I can show you.” He said, embarrassed as he pointed and then just deciding to start walking towards it.

You looked at the man closer, he was tall. And he was very… attractive.

He looked back at you, chuckling to himself when you looked the other way quickly. Your face heated up, and you were nervous.

“So, what brings you out here?”

“Just wanted to clear my head. Works a lot and stuff, Y’Know. I’m a veterinarian, and it’s hard seeing animals I couldn’t save..”

He stared at you, a lot more interested now.

“It’s not your fault.” He shrugged. “Do you work at the one downtown? The one with the poached animals?”

“Yeah, actually.” You looked back at him, smiling slightly.

“That’s really nice. That’s amazing.” He nodded, smiling back.

“Thanks. And what brings you here…” you said, not knowing his name.

“Sergei.”

“That’s a nice name.”

“Thanks.” He chuckled. “Pretty much the same reason as you.” He shrugged.

“Where do you work?”

“Oh- I uh.. I’m actually a hunter.” Was all he could say. It was weird to say that to a vet who just told you they worked on hunted animals.

“That’s cool.” You said.

“Yeah…” he said, finally reaching the parking lot.

“Thanks, Sergei.”

“Of course…” he squinted his eyes to your name tag on your shirt.

“Of course, y/n.” Oh he would definitely remember that.

——————————————————————-

“Ms. Y/n?” One of the interns called.

“Yeah?”

“A man asked for you, he’s in the lobby.”

You furrowed his eyebrows. “He say his name?”

“He said it was Se- Ser.. Sergei?” She struggled to pronounce it.

The guy from the park! You remembered.

“Thank you. I’ll be out in a sec.” You hung up the phone, and continued to finish the check up.

You gave the dog a treat as the family left, you waved to the baby who waved to you.

You looked at Sergei who looked at you, smiling.

“C’mon, I’m on my break.” You said, grabbing his hand as you walked outside.

—————————————————————-

And that’s how it started. It had now been 2 years since you and Sergei started dating, and you now knew he was a mutant, and he knew you were as well.

He knew about your healing abilities, and fast reflexes. And it was so weird to him how you had once gotten bit by a whole tiger (that he brought in) and healed in a few seconds, only saying ow.

You learned about his powers, his strength and his speed, his superhuman like abilities making him almost like a lion.

But he tries not to get you caught up in his work too much, one time a man tried to kidnap you and shoot you. Sergei was home, but you said you wanted to take care of the man.

You healed quickly. The man stood in shock and shot you repeatedly now. “Okay, dude if it doesn’t work the first time why would it work the other times?”

He tried to do it again when he gun clicked, he had run out of ammo. You backed him up against the wall, punching him in the face as he looked at you. How does your arm move that fast? He wondered to himself.

Kraven stood behind you, arms crossed as he watched in amusement.

“I will fucking slit open your abdomen, remove your entrails, and every single other organ in your damn worthless body, then I will throw them in a fire. Don’t come near me or my boyfriend ever again.” You shouted, pointing to the door. The man, terrified, ran out, stumbling on his feet as he did so.

“You’re not seriously gonna let him go?”

“Nah, just wait.”

The man’s screams were heard as he was now taken care of.

Sergei smirked, and pulled you in for a fiery kiss.

“God I fucking love you.”

[absolutebl]

Hi ABL! Can I be what I'm assuming is the 80th person to ask for your analysis about the move of Prem and Boun to GMMTV? Particularly, any thoughts on:

Why did the move happen and does it mean anything that they moved together?

What might this mean for new series with them as a pair and the potential to break up their pairing?

Are there any GMMTV talents that you'd love to see Boun or Prem paired with?

Thanks in advance for any insights!

BounPrem move to GMMTV

DISCUSS!

AKA Thai BL industry speculation, my favorite game!!

I am actually cautiously optimistic about this.

They're an ideal pair for GMMTV to get. Especially if GMMTV continues optioning Japanese IP. These two are beautifully suited to A LOT of yaoi. Just imagine them in a Thai version of Takumi-kun? !

Rise up Broccoli Nation... let's talk kabedons!

Why did the move happened?

From BounPrem's perspective:

I think they've been pretty underserved by their current home and that home is pushing them towards pulps (I refuse to talk about Even Sun and I found Between Us pretty darn disappointing too.) If they want higher quality narratives and content, GMMTV is a better home for them.

Also it will handle their brand better for sponsorship and longevity. I was shocked not to see them on more stuff in Bangkok. Most sponsor gigs and major promos and billboards and such were GMMTV pairs and... ZeeNunew

Right now there are good indication for pairs who WANT to stick together (even while aging up) that GMMTV can handle it - because of what they've done with OffGun and TayNew recently.

It's clear that GMMTV will throw a good pair at decent content (or at least popular stuff) pretty regularly. With GMMTV, BounPrem stand an even better chance at landing a prestige piece, since they have an established fan base.

From the pair's perspective, this is a good career move.

Now, from GMMTV's perspective, let's talk...

Does it mean anything that they moved together?

Yes, it most likely means GMMTV signed them as a BL pair. Some of GMMTV's other hot properties like EarttMix, OffGun, and TayNew clearly want to do (and have done) more than just BL for GMMTV. Even "second levels" like JimmySea are being split for het dramas. It means they lose their BL talent for a good potion of filming season, while they film some other property.

If GMMTV can sign a high value pair that's happy to stay doing BL regularly, that will work very well for them.

ALSO they've add a hot property pair into their stable that's on the EarthMix (highly commercial) level AND willing to do high heat. I think this is key. GMMTV has shown they want to move into sexier stuff (NC-GMMTV?) with things like Moonlight Chicken and Only Friends. VERY few of their existing pairs are willing to go there, and can do it as well as, BounPrem. These 2 do lust and thirst in a way that most GMMTV pairs can't (they are just too brotherly with each other).

I think this is a sign GMMTV want's to enter the after dark market, and move international markets too. (The higher heat stuff tends to be particularly popular outside of Thailand.)

Also, I think it's pretty clear some of GMMTV's hoped for heavy hitters last year (like PerthChimon) aren't working out for them, so it makes sense to onboard a solid bankable pair whole cloth at this juncture.

I said a while ago I thought GMMTV would make a play for ZeeNunew. I didn't have BounPrem on the list as a backup option, but these pairs are kinda similar, and fill the same niche.

Anyway, smart move all 'round, IMHO.

What might this mean for new series with them as a pair and the potential to break up their pairing?

I think the pairing is now less likely to break up than ever.

I think they've possibly been tempted to sign BY a prestige new series carrot. We could get something historical with them in it. Or, like I said, something Japanese IP. Probably higher heat than GMMTV has given us in a full BL.

Eyes Target the Finder thoughtfully. (It was VERY popular when I was over there.)

Are there any GMMTV talents that you'd love to see Boun or Prem paired with?

Like I said, I think GMMTV's objective in signing them would actually be the opposite - NOT to split the pair.

But if you just want me to speculate for fun (and piss stadn off), I'm always happy to do so.

First is great with anyone, so First with either... or both. First is like the MSG of GMMTV, always improves the taste of any dish.

It might be fun to see Jimmy paired with Prem. But in all honestly I really want a Jimmy + Khaotung thing to happen.

I think Mix has some BDE too, so I think he should play the seme for a change, why not him and Prem?

As for Boun, I think he's a little more dependent on the pairing. It's hard for me to imagine him with someone else. Lemme think. Someone with a very soft screen presence, maybe? How about Gun?

Heh he, now I'm just winding ya'll up.

Let me have my foibles.

[blueweaver1]

This is part 2 of my Oathbound AU

Click here for part 1

I been working on this AU some more, as you can see. Above are the different forms that Impulse and Skizz can shift in-between. I just realized I forgot to add Skizz's scruff, please pretend he has it. Below has more details about forms, the environments they grew up it, and how this AU interacts with the Life Series.

--Forms--

Impulse prefers his human form. He works a lot with redstone and machinery so lots of tight spaces and moving parts. So while having horns and wings is cool those parts are more likely to get stuck or pinched.

Skizz prefers having at least his wings out. However, he doesn't like it when random people clock him as an angel. To remedy this, while he has his wings out he'll store his halo in his inventory. If anyone asks what type of hybrid he is, he'll just saying some type of white hawk. Impulse would say Skizz is a type of pigeon.

--Places--

So the places that Angels and Demons are form aren't new dimensions, but more like extensions to existing places. The placeholder names are The Upper and The Under. I thought about using the Aether name, but ultimately decided against it.

The Upper is a place far above the sky. Past the limit where fireworks refuse to ignite. Past the limit where elytra start to freeze and shatter. Past the limit where even the sturdiest avians refuse to go. That is where you'll find the angels.

The Upper is a very cold land. Water isn't a thing up there only ice. However, it's no winter wonderland given that it's much too cold to snow. Angels are built for this type of environment, because while they can eat food most of their energy comes from light. Shelter and tools are made from stone and wood-like materials. Although most angels are perfectly fine just finding a nice, flat, floating rock and sleeping on that. The air up there is very still and quiet.

The Under is a place far below the Nether. Beneath the lava lakes of the Nether, in netherrack that is partially baked from the intense heat and weight, you'll find the demons.

The Under is a very hot land. Winding tunnels and caverns that were dug out connecting with chaotically formed ravines all of which is only lit by lava that has snuck through the cracks. Demons are mostly fire proof, because of this they are able to crawl up from the lava lakes are search for food on the Nether floor. There are things they can eat in The Under, but almost all Demons prefer the stuff from the slightly above. The tunnels are often quite noisy.

If it wasn't clear: The Upper is above the overworld, The Under is in below the Nether.

--Who did the Oath first?--

This was answered in the comments of part 1, but I also wanted to put it here.

So if you asked them directly they would probably give you a different answer time. 1: because it's very personal 2: because it's funny. So what actually happened is both Skizz and Impulse thought of the idea independently, but it was Skizz who brought up it up first. However it was Impulse who did the oath first. Of course it took multiple years for him to psyche himself up to do it, not because he didn't trust Skizz, he was just very nervous about it.

Impulse is also just a "tiny" bit competitive and wanted to go against the demon stereotypes. While Skizz would've preferred it to happen sooner and was will to go first, he understood that this was important to impulse. He does have fun needling Impulse that it took him soooooo long, but it's all in good fun

--Life Series--

I personally like seeing that the Life Series started as a fun hardcore series that turned into a death game due to outside forces. Impulse and Skizz (in their human forms) understand that things are going wrong when the second game starts. While everyone's hybrid abilities are being suppressed by the outside force so no one get too much of an advantage. Yes, they could brute force it by going Eclipse mode and getting everyone out they don't know if that would help in the long run. I mean what if it happens again but since they outsiders how of their powers they don't take Impulse and Skizz and the two of them completely lose track of their freinds?

So they settle for trying to pick up clues and win at least one of the games...

....

...

.... why are they so bad at this ....

(though it sounds like angst, it's probably going to end up as a comedy if I'm going to be honest...)

[copperbadge]

Hello! I live in Chicago but didn’t grow up in the Midwest. The tornado sirens recently really freaked me out, but it seems most Chicagoans were just going about their business. Is there a way for me to know when stuff is about to get serious and I should actually run and hide? I was scared and checking the news, but with everyone else acting normal it felt like overkill. Any advice appreciated!! Thank you!!!!

I actually didn't grow up here either! But I have been in Chicago for about fifteen years now, so I guess I can speak with reasonable authority.

The sirens are for tornadoes, though they have also been set off for high winds, bad storms, etc. They are tested at ten in the morning on the first Tuesday of each month, so a lot of us are conditioned to hear them and think "Must be ten am". I've only ever heard them "for real" a handful of times but I've always paid attention. Probably what you were witnessing was people just...incorrectly not giving a shit.

So, first off: if you hear a siren, get inside. Don't worry about what anyone else is doing. Most people will look around and go "nobody else is freaking out so I guess I don't need to" and that's how you end up dead of Insufficiently Freaking Out. The trick is proportionate freaking out. You want to get inside to safety -- a store, the lobby of an office building or hotel, the nearest El stop, even a car or bus is better than being out on foot. If you can get there safely, go home, that's best, but if you can't get home, get indoors. Once you're in safe shelter you can pretty much stop freaking out unless a storm is actively hitting the building. Take the time to check your phone, figure out how to get home if you aren't, check weather apps to see how long it'll last, etc.

It's not impossible that a tornado would make its way into Chicago, but most of the time when weathermen say "Chicago" they mean "the suburbs". The city itself is so built up, and the lake has such an impact on that kind of thing, that it's unlikely, at least currently. If you are not in a suburb or on the outskirts, the odds of an actual facts tornado are pretty slim. That said, Chicago is subject to high winds at times and the sirens can be set off for that, and high winds in Chicago are no joke.

So for me, the siren is a "stay indoors" warning; the one time I heard it while outside, I didn't freak out, but I did stop what I was doing, turn around, and go home. If you're indoors then you can turn your worry down low, though it doesn't hurt to have the weather on the TV. Just as a matter of course, living in the world, you should have a battery-powered lantern or flashlight and know where it is, make sure your phone is charged or start charging it, and keep an eye on the TV.

If you DO need to get to heavy shelter because a genuine disaster is happening on top of you, it's good to know where to go. You don't generally need to hang out in the shelter pre-emptively unless the weather reporter says to, but it helps a lot to know your options. Most high-rise buildings, office and residential, you want to go to the stairwell; they're reinforced and ventilated. If you're in a house that doesn't have a storm cellar or an apartment like my old one, that was just "top floor of a three-floor walkup", go to an interior room without windows, preferably the bathroom, and get into the empty bathtub.

It's tough to strike a balance between necessary caution and anxious overreaction, and I say that as an anxious over-reactor. But the longer you live here the better your sense will be of what is a genuine emergency. I think it took me about two winters here to get a sense of proportion. Occasional murderous heat waves aside, most of our truly dangerous weather happens December-March, so that's good training in when to wig out.

But yeah -- if you're out in the world and you hear a siren, or you see smoke, or you get a bad vibe somewhere, it is okay, encouraged even, to hit the bricks. Don't wait to see what other people do, don't tell anyone else what to do, just be the person everyone else sees and thinks "Hey, maybe I should be concerned about this."

I once walked onto the northbound platform of the Grand Red Line station when it was actively on fire. I looked around at the smoke and the people casually standing in the smoke waiting for their train, went "Fuck all this noise, I'm not dying for a Red Line train," and went right back out again. Roughly half of the stand-arounds saw me heading purposefully for the stairs and started following me; I had just reached street level again when we heard the evacuation order over the loudspeakers. People make dumb choices until they see someone making a smart one.

ANYWAY IDK how long you've been in Chicago but if you're relatively new, welcome, that kind of shit doesn't happen very often I swear, and if you've been here for a while, sorry for overexplaining. :D I am just very into the idea everyone staying safe and paying attention to the sirens. :D

[andr0nap]

okay im so normal about the idea of a monster plane actually. idk why ive literally never had interests in planes before what have you done (/j). Like is vash actually The Plane? Or is he just a creature that took over the metal structure of the plane? Is the Vash we know actually like. his body? Or is it like an anglerfish lure to make people trust him since its more human shaped? Does he just. have two sets of eyes and brains because he has two "bodies"? I have so many questions frfr

heheheh >:)

okay so!

vash is vash! he used to be able to walk around and do stuff like a normal person/independent before the crash that knocked him out and left him stuck in the engine for like a 100 years. the engine was a prototype designed specifically for the twins to test if they can power and control the machine at the same time, making them a kind of onboard bio-ai

hes not the jet itself. peacemaker is the actual plane and its just a machine. during the 100 year nap something happened and vash rooted himself in the engine and those roots spread through the structure of the plane over time

the "outer body" is just an extension of vash, roots turning into muscle and claws and eyes and teeth as a way to keep him safe and aware of whats going on outside. it has no mind of its own despite looking like a separate entity.

also fun facts!

he doesnt actually have two brains, most of the information input from the outer body gets diluted into like... subconscious info to vash. if you touch a wing or something he will register that theres something touching him without details on temperature or pressure. if his outer eyes see a missile approaching he will just know that he needs to dodge away from it. its very instinctual and stops him from being in constant sensory overload from controlling what are essentially two bodies

most of those eyes actually have very poor but specialized vision, made to track rapid movement and heat signatures (like incoming missiles). if vash had to rely on those eyes alone all hed see is that Theres Something There and that Its Moving.

a lot of peacemakers electronics got destroyed when it crashed the second time so his body just started to replace what was broken with organs roughly doing the same thing. adaptive to a terrifying degree...

[mishy-mashy]

The Resistance squatted in abandoned buildings. They were squatters.

Before I show the panels that show they used abandoned buildings, I just want to be logical about this for a moment.

It doesn't make much sense to assume these guys - looking around jump-into-university age (18-26) - could afford to make underground bunkers and metal-plated halls all across Japan, for their base. They wouldn't have the time, resources, or even support from others to make these places.

Where do they find the metal to hammer in? The posts? The knowledge of actually building tunnels or buildings from scratch without them falling apart?

Other than that, having a single stationary base (above-ground, for example), is not going to survive. All For One's supporters fight anyone who opposes him without him needing to say anything.

AFO rules Japan right now. Everyone is wary of each other. Look at how Bruce describes it as "the harshest era";

As All For One's supporters attack his opposers of their own will, and supporters don't even realize they're on his side, the Resistance has to constantly be on the move. They can't really trust anyone.

They can't have stationary bases, nor can they afford ANYTHING to make them. They would've been caught immediately trying to do a big project like that, especially if they needed supplies to do so from someone who likely works for AFO, even without knowing.

Japan was in economic and social turmoil. They can't trust the market to keep going and grocery stores to be open. Look at how Japan is with All For One and Tomura; people band together and stores are looted.

Money is obsolete. Society is divided between humans and "monsters" (Ability-users). You can't trust anyone because anyone could be his pawn. Time is running up as his control spreads everyday. Resources are being looted left and right. It's too dangerous to go outside alone. Even if you have a stun gun, what does that mean against Ability-users?

So what do they do with their limited resources? Trying to hide from the big guy? What "bases" do they have?

They hunker down in abandoned places that already exist and, again, are abandoned. No one's going to come looking for them in places that people have run from and left behind. Because these places are literally just that: places no one wants anymore.

You hide a tree in a forest. You don't make a big, special base somewhere that says "I am here!", and they don't have the resources or time to burrow underground or build that.

Hide in an abandoned building among many others. There's not many people in abandoned places, if they happen to be there at all. The Resistance isn't going to be found in the deserted buildings, but they still have to keep moving, because someone might be trailing them.

When they take Yoichi from the vault,

They're in a house. The couch is ripped, the mug is cracked, and so is the wall, with a questionable stain in the background. There are signs of fighting and abandonment, but it works.

Houses have food. Houses have clothes. Houses have beds. It's enough to sit in for a bit and heat up some water.

Not everyone packed their things and run. Some people just had to RUN. And when some places are full-on abandoned from an exodus, the Resistance is definitely gonna find some stuff there in the new "safe area".

Look below at where Kudo and Bruce hole up after Yoichi's death. No one's outside, there's a destroyed car, and there's some smoke further up the road.

The hospital/clinic room Bruce uses is ripped apart and unsanitary, but it's still the best they can do. I think that houses and a hospital would be their best bet for survival/using as a base; resources, lodging, and some sort of safety exist there. Especially in a hospital, which would have backup generators, a camera system, and even a PA system. Hospitals have to accommodate for lots of people (food, space, lodging), and have a lot of medical equipment they can use.

Basically what I'm saying is: the Resistance likely doesn't have a permanent base. They don't have the resources or enough safety to make their own. They squat in abandoned places and move constantly, because nowhere is safe, but they can't just waltz in public and declare where they are; they have to hide in plain sight while they bide their time. In the meantime, the places they use would have to be resourceful, or they're using what they have on their backs. The manga already shows them using a house and a hospital room.

[scoops-aboy86]

More of the love spell no go au, because of course I did. This one is a little more bittersweet, because it covers the start of Steve's reaction to both the Russian torture and creeping dread that the Upside Down stuff will keep coming back.

He and Eddie are still close! But Steve is about to make some reluctant choices about his eating and activity habits, because he views it as his duty to help keep everyone he cares about safe.

Part 1, part 1.5, part 2

The day Eddie walks up to Scoops Ahoy and it’s still shuttered, he immediately knows that something is wrong. He has Steve’s schedule memorized, and even if he’d called out Robin would still be here. Uneasy, he goes back out to the parking lot and tries casting a locator spell in his van, sweat dripping into his eyes because the AC is still on the fritz. 

According to the spell, Steve is miles below the mall. That can’t be right. And usually when Eddie’s magic is a flop he keeps getting different wrong answers, like a math problem that you know you’re forgetting a step somewhere but can’t figure out what it is no matter how many times you do it over. This is consistent: below the mall. Or, below the mall and shifting gradually towards the left at a reasonable walking pace. 

It’s so weird that Eddie speeds home and wakes Uncle Wayne, which is usually something he avoids doing but this feels important. Wayne helps him with the spell, but the result is still the same. All Wayne can do is shrug and tell Eddie to trust his intuition when it comes to magic, because making it work through the earth like that can be tricky but Eddie must have at least been casting strong to get such consistent results, and goes back to bed. 

Eddie’s confidence in his magic has frankly been shattered ever since the love spell backfired, and he’s actually woefully out of practice for that exact reason. But he drives to approximately directly above where Steve is (a field maybe a mile or two from the mall) and starts casting whatever protection spells he can think of. One of them might only protect Steve from getting cavities, or it might prevent the loss of entire teeth and/or finger and toe nails. He’s not sure. But hey, the dude works in an ice cream shop, better safe than sorry right?

The downside of being so out of practice is that Eddie wears himself out. He keeps at it for most of Wednesday night and Thursday morning, but passes out around afternoon and wakes up in the back of the van after dark drenched in sweat from laying in the van all day even with the windows cracked open, probably lucky he didn’t get heat stroke. At first he can’t figure out where he is or what woke him, but he stumbles outside and sees a plume of smoke rising from where Starcourt Mall used to be, and…

Steve is just walking over to check on Nancy and Jonathan when Eddie’s van screeches up and Eddie himself jumps the barrier that’s supposed to keep civilians out. That’s the first word that comes to Steve’s mind—civilian—because for a few months there he’d managed to forget. But his head hurts, his face hurts, he’d nearly had a fingernail pried off until Robin had blurted out about the code, and the military guys still had yet to find his car keys that the Russians had confiscated. Steve is tired and hungry and still waiting to find out how bad the car crash (which he hadn’t mentioned to the paramedics, one too many things to remember at the time) fucked up his neck, and he forgets to self-moderate. He drops his shock blanket to grab Eddie in a clingy hug, eyes shut tight as he huffs “Don’t ask what happened, just don’t” into Eddie’s shoulder. 

The scents of leather and weed have never been more comforting before. 

“Hey Munson,” Robin says tiredly, wandering over. “We’re friends-in-law now.”

“What?” Eddie manages over Steve’s disheveled, unwashed hair. 

“Steve and I threw up together and became platonic soul mates,” she explains. 

“Trauma bonded,” Steve adds, still into Eddie’s jacket. Which kind of explains it a little better. Sort of. 

“Not asking,” Eddie decides after a confused moment. “Platonic soulmates, got it. Uh…” He looks around helplessly, recognizing Nancy and Jonathan in the background but no one else in the crowd and he’s just. Standing here with a magnificent hangover and an arm full of Steve Harrington in a bloodied sailor suit. “Anyone need a ride home?”

Only Steve and Robin take him up on the ride, which is fine. He drops Robin off first, and as he’s pulling out of her driveway Steve says, “I don’t know if it’s okay to go to sleep with a concussion.”

Eddie eases the break back on and turns to stare at him. “You have a concussion?”

Steve blinks slowly back at him. “Yeah, kinda.”

“Well… didn’t the EMTs tell you what to do? Like, how to tell if you should go to a hospital or something?”

He shrugs. “I don’t remember. Um… my parents aren’t home though, so I don’t know… Could I stay with you?”

Immediately Eddie thinks of Steve’s big house in Loch Nora, which he’d skulked around a time or two to sell at parties and pine from a distance, compared to the single-wide Munson trailer in Forest Hills. “I don’t know if you’d be comfortable—”

“It’s too much empty space,” Steve says, and there’s a look in his eyes that Eddie hasn’t seen since the first few times he bought weed. Like he’ll sit up all night jumping at shadows. And Eddie gets not wanting to be alone after being in a mall fire (apparently?), but what had put that look there before Starcourt?

“… My place it is.”

Medically, Steve is actually fine to stay alone. He hadn’t been the last time around, after Billy had cracked that plate on his skull, and that’s why Hopper had sent him home with Dustin once the gate was closed; Mrs. Henderson had been a nurse before turning to telemarketing as a way to stay home more with her son. As sure as Steve had been at the time that the Russians had beaten him harder than that, he’s much better then than he had been in November. 

Except he’s not. Because Hopper is dead, and even with the gate closed this shit had still managed to come back, and that makes Steve the man of the group but he’s too scared to sleep in his own house, which is full either of dark ceilings for monsters to crawl out of or light bulbs that could start flickering at any moment. So instead he’s here lying on his side, freshly showered and back to back with Eddie on a twin bed that feels like it’s seen better days. Staring at the bedroom door because the thought of sleeping with his back to it had made his throat feel tight. Maybe that was the whiplash, but he doubts it. 

Steve knows in his bones that the Upside Down isn’t done with Hawkins yet. He needs to train, to get ready… There’s Robin and Erica to think about, freshly drawn into this, one basically all his fault and the other too young to be dealing with horrors like this no matter whose fault it was. There’s Dustin (electrocuted that Russian doctor to death) and Max (watched Billy die) and the rest of the gremlins (Eleven, fuck, she just lost her dad), freshly re-traumatized and just two months out from entering the meat grinder that was freshman year at Hawkins High. If nothing else, he has to be strong for them. Which means…

Steve sighs, hugging himself tightly under the thin sheet. This whole summer he’d been leaning into doing whatever he felt like, and it hadn’t exactly prepared him for an emergency situation. He’d gotten lucky knocking out that one guard, sheer body weight leaning an extra oomph to the hit he’d landed, and that had ended the fight pretty quickly. But it hadn’t gotten him into the room with vent access fast enough to avoid getting himself and Robin captured. Being on the verge of needing to order the next size up in his work uniform hadn't lent him any protection against that Russian truth serum. All his summer of indulgences had led to was eating multiple bags of trash corn while trying to comprehend Back to the Future, which… not his proudest moment, really, but he had been drugged. 

Anyway. The point is, he needs to get back in shape. He is not going to turn into King Steve again, but maybe if he could just get some of it back. Start jogging and working out again, and not indulging his sweet tooth all the time. It’ll suck, but he’s gotta protect his friends—protect Eddie, who hopefully will never have to know about monsters and Russians and little girls with mind powers.

So Steve spends a sleepless night mourning the ice cream cones on his lunch breaks, and extra burgers or slices of pizza whenever ordering takeout, and the way Eddie watches him sometimes. And that last one… Maybe it won’t go away entirely, because they’re close now. Close enough that Steve can apparently just invite himself over and Eddie just lets him without protest, and Steve likes the trailer, likes that it’s small and cozy and actually looks lived in and loved. 

Around dawn, he rolls over and tentatively snuggles up against Eddie’s back, tucking an arm around him when Eddie moves unconsciously towards him rather than away. 

It’ll hurt to lose any of this. But he knows that Eddie will be some amount of disappointed in him for falling back into the jock mold, so… he just wants to hold on a little longer.

Tag list (comment to be added): @hotluncheddie

Part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11

[mvltisstuff]

Hello

Could you make a request for Evan Buckley please.

The request would be based on the song Boyfriend - Big Time Rush. From the perspective of Buck who has a crush on his new neighbor.

Chim and Hen, tease each other about their supposed crush. But Buck knows it's not just a passing crush. Please, thank you 🙈 ✨

boyfriend - e.b

summary: request

evan buckley x reader

a/n: THAT UR LOOKIN FOR A BOYFRIEND I SEE THAT GIMME TIME YK THAT IMA BE THERE

she kind of looked like a robber smuggling boxes into the car. but, she looked beautiful while she did it. i saw the renting sign outside when i left for work every day. i wondered who’d be coming in next, but i just figured it was no one that would be too interested in me.

“here, can i help you with that?” i asked, noticing her struggle to carry in the two boxes.

“please,” she smiles. that’s when i first noticed her beauty. she graciously looked at me with the most gentle persona.

“i’m evan, buck,” i decide to say, despite my nervousness that’s accumulated from her. “i live right there.”

“good to know,” she says. “i don’t know anyone in this building, so it’s nice someone’s finally said something.”

i smile back at her, leading the boxes into the room. it looked similar to mine, so i knew where to put things.

“i hate moving,” she groans. “it’s such a pain.”

“i know, i remember when i moved out of my old place i just threw out a bunch of stuff.”

she looks back at me, and i feel the heat on my neck. i’ve known this woman for maybe five minutes and i’m already nervous near her. i cant be falling for someone this quickly. it’s happened in the past, and i won’t let it happen again.

“are you from the area?” i manage to ask to break the silence.

“yeah, i’ve lived in california my whole life, but never in la. you?”

“i’ve bounced around a lot. mainly from pennsylvania but i came here to work for the LAFD.”

“you’re a firefighter?”

“i am,” i grin, it’s already clear to her how much i love my job. “i love it, the team here is so great. the areas pretty good, too.”

“you’ll have to show me around sometime,” she says, effortlessly.

“yeah!” i reply, too fast which makes her bewitching smile appear again. “or, sure, i’d love to. if you need anything, i’m right next door.”

“thank you, buck,” she starts walking toward the open door to grab another box as i slide out next to her.

“of course…” i point at her lightly, realizing i don’t even know her name and i like her already.

“y/n,” she tells me. of course she has a beautiful name.

“right, y/n,” i send her another grin and go back to my apartment. when i see hen and chim walk toward my door, i meet them there.

“who’s that?” chimney asks.

“just a neighbor,” i say. “i was helping her move in.” the two partners exchange a glance, knowing i never meets a girl without taking an interest in her.

whenever i leave for work on certain days, it’s around the time y/n leaves too. she’s dressed in a casual, but business-like outfit that fits her perfectly. everyday, i’m blessed with the sight of her when start walking down the hallway. suddenly, today when i see her walking from her room, i can’t help but smile at her in hopes to get back her shining one.

“hey,” she speaks softly.

“hi,” i reply. “you like the building so far?”

“it’s perfect,” she exhales. “its so much better than the last place i was. it was my ex’s, but it didn’t work out.”

“oh, i’m sorry,” i say, but i’m also trying to figure out if i’m actually sorry.

“don’t be,” she manages to still pull out a bright aura that just makes everyone around her feel the same. “there’s better things waiting for me.”

after, she walks away and out of the building, and i pause behind her. better things, what could possibly be better. my next thought could have risen from my ego, but maybe i can be the next better thing.

at work, i’m permanently wondering about her. i don’t want to scare her off, she just moved in. something about her is catching me. it’s more than just her glory, it’s her mood and the way she carries herself with such decency and respect. she’s truly one of the most beautiful people i’ve ever seen, just to add. even when i’m sitting in the truck on the way to a scene, i just think about her over the rumbling of the street and murmuring of my friends.

“what’s got him so… on another planet?” bobby asks, looking back to me.

“sorry, what?” i ask, snapping out of y/n in my mind.

“i think i might have an idea,” hen teases, giving me a suggestive look. “any new neighbor time?”

“aw, the kids got a crush!” chim pokes his own fun at me, nudging my shoulder lightly as he chuckles at himself next to me.

“it’s not a crush,” i try and clear. “i just- she’s really nice and she’s gor- guys she’s gorgeous. she’s also single! so, more for me i guess.”

“listen, kid,” bobby starts. “just don’t get too attached too fast. remember how upset you were with abby?”

“trust me, she’s no abby-“

“where does she work? who’s her family? what’s her life behind closed doors?” i remain silent after being bombarded with questions. i know they’re trying to save me from more heartbreak, but i can’t help but be a little hurt. “exactly, you don’t know anything about her. why don’t you just ask her out? really get to know her…”

“it’s way too soon, she just got settled and i don’t want to be a pest.”

“buck, do you want this to be another girl you like that moves on without you?”

“not really,” i sulk, trying to think of the brighter side.

“then go for it!” hen encourages, bouncing back in on the fun discussion of my love life.

“fine!” i agree. “i’ll try and see if she’ll go out with me, now leave me alone!” i joke, in hopes to end the talk as we pull up to the scene we were called to.

after my shift had ended, i went back home. i was secretly manifesting an interaction with her, so maybe i had a chance to speak to her. the gods must’ve heard me, because when i saw her heading out of her apartment, dressed in slightly less casual clothes. she had a see-through black top with another cropped, tank top under it with a pair of jeans. her hair was done and her makeup was too, so i figured i missed my chance. she was probably going on a date.

when her voice entered my ears, part of me just wanted to keep opening my door. i didn’t want to hear about another guy, but i knew her sweetness would make her say something to me. she didn’t deserve someone like me, but i spoke to her anyway.

“long day?” she asks, slowing herself down as she passes by me.

“not too bad,” i say, giving her a kind grin back. “you look nice, though. headed out?”

“yeah,” she sighs. “just myself, though. i got dinner with friends, but i figured i’d grab a drink or something, too. they all had to leave, though.”

“o-oh!” i say, finding myself relieved that she’s not going on a date. it’s now or never, i tell myself. i have to take this shot or i’m gonna miss her forever. as soon as i open my mouth to speak, she does too.

“i was gonna go down to the bar on 7th,” she tells me. “you know if it’s any good?”

“it’s so good there, they make the best cocktails in la,” i turn my body toward her more, and i can sense her getting nervous with the pressure in the hallway too.

“do you, um,” she stutters and laughs at herself to try and ease the tension between us. it sounds bad, but i found her nervousness adorable as i can tell what she’s going to say next. “do you wanna come with me? maybe get to, like, know one another?”

the look on my face probably was frozen in, the face of anxiety and excitement. “yeah,” i begin. “yeah, i’d love to come.”

“great,” she beams back at me, and i put my extra things in my apartment before we walk down together.

it’s definitely something great.

[schrodinger-swriter]

HI AGAIN!! i saw you said we were allowed to put one or two asks in at a time so i’m hopping on that haha. first of all, with my first husk request, i’d like to say right after i sent that in, i noticed one or two letters you had already done and i would just like to say i’m so sorry if that caused you any extra work!! (well not sorry enough cause i’m coming back to give you more PFF- 😭😭) (sorry i’m crazy, moving on) but if you could give me Lute with the following letters that’d be amazing!! : A, B, G, H, U

thank you sm again!! your work fucking rocks haha, i will definitely be in here more after you do the first two requests i sent, no rush tho!! love ya (/p) and your work 💕

A, B, G, H, and U for Lute

No need to apologize! Slip ups happen all the time. I actually have the switch between windows when I'm updating the masterlist when a new alphabet post is made! Aha!

I hope this is alright, I admit I struggle with writing softer... more domestic stuff for Lute, so this post may be a little short..

ATTRACTION:

Lute would be interested in someone strong... strong body and strong willed. Though only if your loyalties lie with Heaven. Lute already spends her days fighting.. and it seems she might even be Adam's right hand man.. Woman.. his personal guard, it seems. Be it assigned or voluntary. She is more than willing to protect and fight for you, but knowing you can provide for yourself puts her at ease as well as makes her feel more secure.

BONDING:

Similar to the Vaggie post, you both tend to bond when the pair of you spare together. Lute seems to be very skilled in combat, that sort of thing doesn't happen over night. The only drawback here is that she's likely to go a little hard on you, and perhaps she's a bit of a sore loser..? You might be able to convince her to go out and do something relaxing, though it will take a lot of coaxing to pull her away from her duties.

GIFT GIVING:

Lute doesn't do gifts often. She doesn't exactly know how to react when given a gift, so she might react a little tensely. She does appreciate it, she just isn't used to being cared for like that. Likewise, the thought to give you gifts outside of special occasion doesn't cross her mind. She's more of an acts of service person, anyway.

HARSH:

Lute can be very intense. Heaven and it's plans will always come first for her, which can put a nasty strain on the relationship if time and time again she puts the plans you've made together to the side. She can also get really into an argument if she's passionate about the subject, even sometimes saying something in the heat of the moment.

She's stubborn, too. "Angels don't make mistakes", you know? But you're an angel too.. I mean you'd likely be one, right? Given Lute's obvious disdain for anything sinful. Getting an apology out of her is like pulling teeth, though her tense... well tense-er body language does show that she's having mixed thoughts going on inside of her. Tries to offer peace by doing something for you.

UPSET:

When Lute is upset she tends to... shut herself away, a lot of her feelings being outwardly converted into something that LOOKS like annoyance or anger. She'd much rather spend some time alone letting off some steam.

When you're upset she can be a little... emotionally distant. She's trying to connect, but she's so used to being this war machine of sorts that being vulnerable wasn't something she ever considered. She's trying, and even if she doesn't say much she's listening to you rattle off about what's gotten you in a sour mood.

[star-crifice]

James Diamond x Reader

Words: ~ 3160

A/N: My 10 year old self must've taken over me and ghostwritten this bc why the hell am I, a 19 year old, writing BTR fanfiction AND it's the best stuff I've written in months. God. Have fun. I'm so done over here.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

James has got a thing for you.

And that’s not a secret, not even to you. When he likes someone, he pursues them – that’s nothing new. The very moment you stepped into the Palmwoods, retrieving your key and James just so happened to walk into the lobby, the word “Dibs!” left his lips so fast, his friends didn’t even have a chance to lay eyes on you.

He wasn’t afraid to show you his interest, just like he was with every other person that appealed to him. But the difference with you was that every sweet word from him was laced with the tiniest bit of hesitation.

Just after a few days of getting to know you, the sheer thought of being rejected by you would have ruined him. One part of him wanted to share every sweet thought about you that ever crossed his mind, another part of him was – possibly for the first time – genuinely scared of your reaction.

His advances at you didn’t go unnoticed. At first, you felt flattered at such a good looking, charming guy flirting with you. Though it did feel a bit overwhelming, you barely knew him after all. You thought if he actually liked you like that, he would wait a bit. He’d be ready to get to know you more. But that wasn’t quite the case, at least how it appeared to you.

You got to know the boys of Big Time Rush along with the friends they made in the Palmwoods and spent a lot of time with them. However, James would always try to get close to you – it felt suffocating. You didn’t have the heart to reject him and tried to instead gently push him away, both literally and metaphorically.

James didn’t quite get it, thinking you aren’t into him yet and he would have to try harder. But after a while it felt simply pointless to him and he stopped. He went back to his usual self, flirting with any pretty girl willing to pay attention to him. It was obvious that he did this to distract himself from you, but if anyone would have asked him he’d insist that he’s over you – what a lie. At that point he was head over heels.

Desperation coated his aimless flirts, reaching for the attention he craved from you.

At this point James and you were good friends, having known each other for a bit longer. You finally felt like you knew him and he might know you.

It happened quite overnight – no, actually. Faster than that. He was only a friend, you swear. But that one friday night… A power outage. A few people from the Palmwoods sat outside beside the pool, surrounding a campfire. That and the countless candles being the only sources of light shimmering on your skin. A guitar went around, person after person sharing their musical talent waiting for the electricity to come back. Of course, it didn’t take long until it was James and his friends' turn. You were swaying back and forth, humming along with the tune of their song and basking in the heat of the fire. It was a very cozy moment and for the first time since arriving at the Palmwoods, you felt like you were surrounded by normal teens instead of aspiring stars. You’ve never felt closer to your friends, neighbors and even the people you’ve never talked to. You dared to look over at the boys singing, just a moment. But that very second you laid your eyes on James, something clicked in your mind. You’ve seen him countless times, always looking perfect, keeping himself in check. Though in that moment, the way he sat there – his hair disheveled from being in the pool, wearing his still slightly wet swimming trunks and a loose shirt, singing and swaying and having fun – something sparked in you.

And suddenly you missed when he shifted to sit just a bit closer to you, kept eye contact like his life depended on it and would put his hand on your shoulder, so tender and carefully as if he could scare you away. You took it for granted back then. That was quite literally how you got to know him and now that part is basically gone.

That “moment” you looked at him happened to turn into a full on stare. Not too obvious of course, but embarrassing enough that when his gaze caught yours, you turned your head faster than you even processed what just happened.

You’d like to slap yourself for the train of thought that just occupied your mind. Yes, James was nice and lovely and good looking and charming and whatever – but to you he also seemed like he never took it seriously.

To you, he tried to wrap you around his finger until he realized that you aren’t that easy to swoon.

To you, it seemed like he got bored of you and flirted with the next girl, until he got bored of her and flirted with the next. Again and again.

To you he was just a heartthrob, simple as that.

To him, you were an unattainable star he could only wish for.

Therefore, only a friendship blossomed between the two of you.

A while has passed since that night of realization and to be honest, you kept struggling to look at James the same. He shined a bit brighter in your life and that made you mad. There was no way you could ever have something serious with him, you told yourself. Just yesterday you saw him in the park with his arm around a pretty black haired girl.

Though the truth is, her eyes reminded James of yours. And he ghosted her by the end of the day because her laughter sounded off beat and sour compared to yours. He kept asking himself if you laugh at other peoples jokes like you do at his – if you ever gifted that smile, that one special smile he only saw a couple of times, to anyone but him. He hoped you didn’t.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

James, Carlos, Logan and Kendall were at the studio, recording a song like so often. As usual they were having fun, making jokes, pissing off Gustavo until James fell silent.

“Everything alright?” Logan asked after he took note of James' sudden change in behavior.

“My mother will come this evening,” he says rather quietly, shocked at himself for forgetting this.

“That’s good though, isn’t it? As long as she doesn’t want to take you back to Minnesota.” Kendall shrugs.

Of course that’s good. James is glad that he might build a normal mother-son relationship despite the long distance, now that his mother agreed to come visit him more often. However, there is one tiny little issue…

“I told her I have a girlfriend,” James admits.

“But you don’t..?” Carlos raises an eyebrow, “When was the last time you’ve had an actual girlfriend?”

“THATS-” James says loudly before cutting himself off, “Don’t say it like that.”

He takes a deep breath, thinking about how to handle this situation. A while ago his mother called, in true motherly fashion she obviously had to know about her son's love life. He might have been too prideful, and amidst his pride a bit delusional; he didn’t want to admit that for the first time in a while, he was hopelessly in love with someone. So he lied.

Of course he had a girlfriend. She’s lovely and special, not like any of the girls he brought home that his mother never approved of.

The band wasted no time, finishing work in record speed, rushing out of the studio so fast, not even Gustavo's angry shouts reached them. They were going to find a “girlfriend” for James for this evening, no matter what it takes.

They reached the Palmwoods, scanning the lobby like they were on a hunt.

“Any preferences or just anyone? Look at that blonde over there, she’s pretty!” Carlos pointed across the room.

“Oh no she knows me,” James shook his head.

“We need someone we can trust to play along and lie. And she has to lie well, you know James’ mom.” Logan thought out loud.

Just in the right moment, you came out of the elevator, walking across the lobby.

“Her!” Kendall, Logan and Carlos shouted in unison. You stopped in your tracks, hesitantly pointing to yourself with a questioning expression, “Me?”

James stared at you with wide eyes. Of course you’d be the perfect fit. You know him, join his shenanigans regularly, aren’t too bad at lying and surely wouldn’t get your hopes up like others might. Though his heart aches a bit at the thought. He doesn’t admit it to himself, but he still likes you just a bit too much for his liking. Maybe he’d be the one to falsely get his hopes up after acting out a relationship for a whole evening. Going back to friends after his mother leaves might hurt a little too much. Is he ready to take that risk?

“We need you to be James' girlfriend!” Kendall said loudly, rushing over to you along with Carlos and Logan.

“What? Huh?” You’re surprised to say the least. Was that a confession? A joke? The boys explained the situation to you – a bit fast and all over the place, but good enough. By the end of it, James finally walked over to the four of you, his expression being a mix of embarrassment, panic and hope.

“Could you do that? Pleeeease? For us?” Kendall said, joined by Carlos: “We’ll make it up to you, pinky promise!”, as Logan nodded profusely.

“I guess, yeah. We can do that.” You nodded slowly, looking over at James. The tension in his shoulders was gone, he could breathe for a moment.

Together, you went up into the band’s apartment, being greeted by Kendall’s mom. She already started the dinner and immediately you joined her and helped prepare the meal and table. With now 5 more people by Ms. Knights side, it took significantly less time to get everything ready.

“James, can you pass me the plates?” You asked the boy, he looked at you for a moment, appearing like a deer in headlights, before bringing you the stack of plates. You smiled at him, nodding as a thanks and put the plates down around the table.

The both of you haven’t been this close in a while and on top of that, didn’t feel this awkward around each other in a while. About half an hour until James' mother arrives at the Palmwoods, the food was simmering on the stove and the table looked like straight out of a five star restaurant, adorned with flowers and folded napkins.

You joined James on the sofa, letting yourself fall against the soft cushions in hopes of it releasing the tension building up inside of you. In just 28 minutes you’d have to act like the girlfriend of the boy you’ve had a very complicated almost-crush on (that you had yet to admit to yourself).

“You’re stupid, you know that?”, you said with a slight laugh in your voice. James turned to you, slouched back into the sofa with his arms crossed. Up until then, he looked serious and deep in thought. Now he’s raising an eyebrow and fighting a smile.

“For lying to my mom?”

“For lying to your mom,” you said, slowly subconsciously mimicking his pose. You looked at him a bit longer, trying to figure out what he thought at the moment.

“It’s gonna work out, yeah? I’ll try my best. I’ll be so all over you, your mom would think we're about to get married or something,” you tried to joke to lighten the mood, slightly nudging his knee with yours. A long sigh escaped his lips and finally, a smile appeared.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“So you’re the lucky girl?” Ms. Diamond says in an unreadable voice. James just picked her up at the entrance of the Palmwoods, guiding her up into the apartment where everyone else was waiting patiently. She walked through the door, radiating willpower, sternness and a bit of sass.

Now she’s standing in front of you, reaching out her hand for you to shake and looking you up and down, before glancing towards James, raising her eyebrows so quick you almost didn’t see it. You follow her gaze over to her son, widening your eyes a bit, hoping he gets the message that you're ‘struggling over here!!!!’

He quickly comes over, resting his hand on your back. You see his mother noticing the gesture and lean a bit into James' touch, just as the cherry on top.

The both of you guide Ms. Diamond over to the table and you rush to help Ms. Knight with the pots and pans, bringing them over to the table. As everything’s ready and you want to sit down, James quickly gets up from his seat beside you and pulls out the chair for you in true gentleman's fashion. He gestures to you to sit and you do as he says, before he pushes your chair to the table.

Accidentally, as he sits down, his knee touches yours, but he doesn’t pull away. Neither do you. You keep telling yourself it’s just for show.

Everyone starts chatting – especially the two mothers of the table that desperately need to catch up – and filling their plates up. You do as everyone else, though quietly. You’re so unbelievably focused on James (obviously for the sake of the lie) that you’re not sure what to say.

“So,” Ms. Diamond says, her voice effortlessly louder than the others, “How did you two sweethearts meet?”James and you look at each other. Shit. You didn’t plan anything like that.

“Uhm..” You start, stalling a bit to figure out a good story.

“Right here, at the Palmwood,” James says confidently after a moment, “She walked in and I saw her and I said ‘wow!’”

“Actually, he said ‘DIBS!’,” Carlos says with a full mouth, earning a light punch from Katie.

“I got to know the boys and he didn’t move from my side,” you add to James’ retelling.

“It just kind of happened. We became friends and slowly… more,” he looks at you and you have to fight to keep a smile on while hearing his corny words. You nod, looking at your food to not let the mask slip.

James' mother asks you more and more and you feel like you can’t put an end to it. Every now and then James would get a bit closer, say something sweet to you or simply wink. You felt like when you arrived at the Palmwoods. But you let it happen, for the sake of fooling his mother. And maybe you enjoyed it a bit. Just a tiny little bit.

But the thought that all this is just fake and quite literally the result of the fact he doesn’t take relationships seriously, makes you want to push him away again.

Gently just like the way he slowly grabs your hand right now.

Tenderly like the way he lets his thumb glide up and down over the ridges of your knuckles.

You want to push him away, just not too far. So he’ll be gone for now but might come back later.

Maybe you just want to push him to lay your hands on him just once, but there are better ways to do that, aren't there?

So you let it happen, basking in his adoration for once. Enjoying it a bit too much for your liking.

After about an hour of dinner and chit-chat, Ms. Diamond excuses herself and her son to go on a little mother-son-walk through the park. You bid goodbye to her, reciprocating her firm handshake as a good last impression.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

You finish washing the dishes before James comes back from the walk. Neverending questions about what his mother thinks of you plague your mind, but you're not sure why. The show is over after all.

Finally back in your own apartment, you pace back and forth, replaying the events of today again and again in your head. It’s already a bit dark out when you almost overhear someone knocking on the door from how filled your mind is. You rush over, not even looking through the peephole before opening the door.

Of course, James is there. Alone and calm, no smile or even flirtatious smirk adorning his face.

“Hi,” you say, curious about what he wants.

“Hey.” He lays his hand on the door, pushing slightly, letting himself in. It’s dark in your apartment, aside from a small warm lamp on a table beside the couch, illuminating the both of you just enough, casting an orange glow on his face like that night at the campfire.

Oh and how you wish that feeling in your stomach – just like that night at the campfire – would leave.

You take a few steps back, standing awkwardly in your living room, letting him come in.

“How did it go? The walk with you mom,” you ask quietly. He nods, collecting his words and looking into the lamp.

“Good. She liked it. She liked you, I think.”

“What did she say?” you ask, now even more curious. She liked you.

“You seem like a sweet person. She’s used to other types of girls from me. She thinks you’d be good for me.” He laughs a bit at the end.

You fidget with your hands, not sure what to say. Usually he’s more cheery and talkative, finding topics for conversations, even if he just wants to talk about himself.

“So… friends, right?”, you say, even more quietly.

A smile forms on his lips, barely visible, “I don’t know. Do you like me? Because I like you.”

“I know you do. You like a lot of people though, so what’s it worth?”

His smile drops.

“If you’re not going to give me a chance, then at least a kiss to get over you?”

He steps closer, you stay put.

“You’re just trying to swoon me,” you say, trying to be stern but hearing that sentence out of your own mouth makes you smile a bit. He comes closer again and you want to step back, but looking at him makes you remember all the times he made your heart flutter. You think of all the times you looked at him and thought to yourself, if he kissed you now, you’d be his. You feel his warmth now, he leans in.

And you let it happen. And you kiss back. Gently. Tenderly. Slow.

One kiss, he said. But not how long it will last.

Eventually, you pull back, looking down.

“Are you over me now?” you ask, not sure what answer you’re hoping for.

“Are you kidding?” he laughs.

“So… this is serious, then?” you ask hesitantly.

He nods.