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talenlee · 2 years

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Story Pile: Megatokyo

New Post has been published on PRESS.exe: Story Pile: Megatokyo

Throughout 2022 I made a bit of fun on social media by reminding people that Megatokyo, the webcomic, was still updating, and had through all 22 years of its existence, produced a plot that at this point spanned roughly a week. It’s one of those things that when you present it to people who remember reading it as literal children creates an interesting reaction that shows you what they remember.

But what of me? What did I remember? I thought that maybe I should go check it out, and see what I thought of Megatokyo, since after all, I’d stepped out well before the talking robot girl had made a schoolfriend who was also the avatar of female tragedy. What is Megatokyo now? And how has it changed? Is it what you remember? is it better? is it worse?

What would I answer to the question, What is Megatokyo?

Content Warning: Y’know, there’s a lot of pretty nasty misogyny in Megatokyo, though not anything I’d step up to the level of a content warning. What I would content warn, though, is the commonality with which they suggest an adult Piro date a fifteen year old.

Megatokyo is a webcomic that launched in the year 2000, immensely successful for its form and platform, and one of those ‘top ten most popular’ things in its genre for a number of those years. Famously slow paced, erratic and unreliable in its update schedule, its claims to fame early on mostly were tied to its high art quality compared to other webcomics of the time and its quirky mix of Anime Softboy Piro and Libertarian Gamer Largo, and that’s kind of where the simple summary breaks down. You can’t really look at Megatokyo as the thing it started as, or the reason it was successful, because those things are amorphous and there’s a lot of assumptions. I mean I assume it succeeded because it looked good compared to a dozen sprite comics and stuff that looked like Sluggy Freelance. What’s more, ‘why it was notable in 2000’ is really unimportant in 2022, where I’m trying to look at what Megatokyo, the whole text, is.

The best thing you can give Megatokyo at the moment is abridgement. Twenty-two years on, waiting between strips and the dead strips are all no longer being drawn out by weeks at a time. The first year or so of comic strips are a breezy read, around 129 pages, which load nice and quick and honestly ricochet through the narrative at a pretty breakneck pace. I started this article imagining in my heart of hearts thinking that I’d just read all of Megatokyo. All twenty years of it, which totals up to about 1600 pages. As I write this down now, the ‘jot notes down’ stage of things, I am at 412 pages, which puts me in March 2003. That means that within the first 3 years of the comic, a quarter of it got made, which is honestly pretty good — that’s around 72 pages a year, which is about two pages a week. You could do a lot worse than that in a lot of serialised publications.

Of course, then there’s the question about what is or is not ‘Megatokyo‘ in this context. At first, I started by noting how often pages were what I filed as ‘padding.’ They were dead art days, ringer days, diary days, explainers for delays in the comic, and my numbers found that first ‘chapter’ of Megatokyo was composed of 83 ‘strips’, and 38 pieces of filler content. I don’t know if that content proportion holds; honestly, I imagine it gets worse, with more and more dead art days over time, until updates are instead interspersed with great big gaps of nothing, but I won’t know until I get there.

I wanted to make sure I spent some of this time noting down my reactions to the characters, the ways the story was telling me things and the things the story seems to think of as important, though, because it’s a lot easier to give the benefit of the doubt at the end of an archive binge, when you’re trying to construct the narrative in your own head. And I think that it holds that some of the best things you can do for Megatokyo is cut out a bunch of Megatokyo.

I need to talk about Megatokyo‘s author. No, not Piro. No, not Fred Gallagher. No, not Largo, or Rodney, or Dom or Ser. None of those people, but rather instead, the Author of Megatokyo, in a Barthesian sense.

Fred Gallagher fell out with Rodney Carston. Fred Gallagher has had depressive spirals, and personal medical tragedy and breakdowns and collapses. Fred Gallager is a person, and that person has been influenced in immense ways by material needs and constraints, and I will talk a little about what I think of that. But Fred Gallagher isn’t ‘the Author’ of Megatokyo and should not be regarded as such, because Megatokyo‘s author is the single mind that created the first strip and the most recent strip. Both of those people who did that were called Fred Gallagher, but they were not the same person by any measure.

I want to talk about what Megatokyo makes me think and feel and what it’s about as a historical millenial story. I want to talk about things that the text seems to me to be trying to do, because that seems the most reasonable way to treat this text as a whole object with its own ideas, and not as a diary of the breakdown of a man cursed in a way only capitalism can curse you. To that end:

The Author Of Megatokyo Is Dead, Because The Author Of Megatokyo Was Never Alive.

When I refer to Piro, I use that to mean the character Piro, and the fact that Piro is written by someone who for a while there wanted to be primarily known and seen as Piro is a detail that the diegesis can discard. It’s interesting if you want to particularly pick on him but I think that picking on him at this point is sort of redundant. The Author of Megatokyo then is the collapsed personality you can see in the work, a mind that would make the jokes that are made here and why they might make them. If a comic makes a particular kind of joke, you can probably reliably expect that the author of that comic finds that joke funny; just in the same way you can expect a comic made in English has an author that understands English.

Without delving too much into Megatokyo’s failings at this point, one thing I think is most important about Megatokyo‘s author is that they value nostalgia and impressions. There’s a shocking amount of things in the comic that claim, in some way, to be ‘about’ something in particular, or reference caring about a thing, but then demonstrate a breathtaking ignorance of it; if you told me the Author of Megatokyo had never been to Japan at all I wouldn’t actually doubt you. There are all these little giveaways, like the ways people have their meals, freely available guns, high speed highway chases, american-style health insurance and details like car accidents and a lack of attention paid to trains. This is not about Japan, this is about the Japan you think you like if you liked thinking about Japan a lot in 2000.

The Author has concerns outside of the comic that creep into them, too; there’s an antipathy towards internet forums and commentators, a distrust of normies, a shocking distaste for women and their agency, and a surprisingly common reliance on violence as a punchline in a way that makes me feel like they’re not very confident.

The confidence and distaste for women show up a lot more in the early parts, but don’t seem to have gone away around strip 500. Early strips relied a lot on the joke structure of someone being awful to a woman then being hurt for it, which meant, to make a joke, a lot of characters harrassed women. Repeatedly. A big part of this is a specific joke structure that was, I think, kind of Mcluahn-like, embedded in the form by another media.

Okay, okay, so this is a big reach, this is unprovable, but it explains a trend I lived through and I think that the story has some explanatory power. When I talk about it, please recognise this is a lens that works for me, this is an explanation for a trend that makes sense to me and I think helps me mentally avoid y’know, some creative problems.

I think that weeby webcomics are populated with a particular joke structure that occurs by trying to emulate an anime punchline.

If you watch a lot of 90s comedy anime, a very common thing is a character does something or says something funny but inappropriate, trying to get away with something they shouldn’t or being somewhere they shouldn’t, rather than stay and explain what’s going on or what they were doing, the show tends to keep things pacing on by having someone in the scene whallop them so hard they go flying out of the scene. This is a structure used a lot by Takahashi across her, let’s say, shithead-based narrative stories, and she used it for a lot of sex-based slapstick.

Webcomics that wanted to emulate anime aesthetics of the 90s were often being made by people who could reference that particular vein of punchline-PUNCHline moment. Also, and this is again, conjecture, I think a lot of webcomics were very keenly aware that they weren’t very funny. What’s more, they were often stuck with a four-panel structure, which means you’d get something like:

Panel 1: Framing for a joke

Panel 2: Setup for the punchline

Panel 3: The actual punchline

Panel 4: A reaction for the punchline

And I think, because overwhelmingly these were being made by people who weren’t boiling with confidence, panel 4 would be a reaction of violence, a shocking and abrupt ‘bam you got hurt for the thing you did,’ which was often a bad joke or a thoughtless line or a cheesy pick-up line. And that structure plays into how, in the early Megatokyo stories, a four panel comic that couldn’t come up with a use for its fourth panel would regularly have Largo say or do something misogynistic or awful, and then, the fourth panel is an understated observation of the aftermath of some violence. A doctor patching someone up, or a news report about someone getting hurt, or Piro hearing that something bad just happened to Largo.

What I’m saying is that an attempt to be Takahashi made Megatokyo into Ctrl-Alt-Delete.

Part of what bothers me in the reread is how much Megatokyo seems to have the edges of some ideas, as it is filled with conversations about media, games, and culture, but these ideas are so basic and stupid and dead-end with cliches. There’s this whole recurrent thread about how Piro liking dating sims was a problem because it made him weak, and not Piro objectifying real women was the problem.

It wants to comment on games because of Largo liking games but it has no idea about how people interact with games. It’s full of characters who clearly like hentai but is deeply dismissive of sex work, and in the same way, these characters seem to always be looking for a woman who is to blame for the things that are going wrong in their lives! Largo spends a huge chunk of the story at war with a girl because he thinks there’s something sus about her, and there is something sus about her, but even the ways he tries to address that involve approaching her as a problem who needs to be solved.

It’s not like this isn’t a story with some ideas in it. It’s definitely trying with both hands to pull together a bunch of different ideas, ideas that maybe had some purpose once, when the story started but as the story persists, the longer it goes without being able to resolve or conclude those story bits, the Author just keeps stapling together things they like. It also creates this weird phenomenon of backpedalling, sometimes as quickly as two panels immediately after one another, with a day between them. There’s a sequence where a teenager finds Piro’s books and her reaction at first implies that she’s looking at hentai he draws, but then the next panel, on the next day, opens with her saying ‘well I’m definitely not looking at hentai here.’

Then what the fuck was that first reaction?

This character’s reaction to Piro’s art is one of those other ways the story seems to be telling me ‘hey, here’s what you should think about this,’ and it’s also one of the ways the story underscores the theme of sadness. It keeps bringing up sadness, the sadness of a character, the sadness of an art, the sadness of a fandom, the sadness of a particular interest, and it keeps bringing up sadness itself as if the sadness is what makes someone interesting. This art is so sad, this artist draws sad characters, he was drawn to this character because there was a sadness to her (even if that wasn’t actually who she was).

I think Megatokyo is a story about how being sad is the same thing as being interesting. And hoping that other people in the world think that too. That a character with the right aesthetic presentation, the right drowned babymanchild, is inherently interesting. You should care about Piro because he’s sad. Piro cares about characters because they’re sad. That’s why he draws them to be sad. Piro’s emotional state is soooo strange, so unlike other boys, so much so that a brain-warping AI that manipulated people assumed he was a female player and he didn’t take well to being hit on in a game, where he was also, again, sad.

You can unpack a whole thing there if you want. Seems you can’t manipulate lesbians over the internet.

Good Girl.

There’s a lot of a particular kind of softboy fantasy to Piro. The character is the hub of a lot of attention from people who value him and his opinion a lot when one of his only acts of selflessness so far was giving away someone else’s money. And I don’t get why I’m meant to like that. I don’t feel like Piro is interesting because he is sad, I feel like he is sad, because he gets to be sad, because he keeps seeming to resort to sadness as a personality trait. He complains about the people around him, especially women, and that’s why he’s sad – because people are making him sad, and that’s not interesting. It’s wretched.

According to the timescale of Megatokyo, there have been about twenty days since the start of the story proper, with a two week timeskip early in chapter 0 to set up the predicament of our freeloading idiot protagonists becoming homeless. It means that the world of Megatokyo is a historical one; it is set in a year 2000 Tokyo where Fukushima Daichi hasn’t happened, where no global financial collapse happened, no impeachment of Park Geun-Hye or assassination of Shinzo Abe happened. Hell, in Megatokyo, Sega is still in the eyes of the gamer audience, a leading console manufacturer, which is why they have black vans and sick-ass secret cops with guns. The PS2 is a loathed upstart console made by an Enemy, Love Plus is eight years away, and Metal Gear Solid 2 isn’t out yet.

The entirety of this story then, is the work of a millenial weeby author, perhaps fresh out of college, writing and creating about the way they felt in that one period of time, as the memories get fuzzier and the culture moves on.

This whole thing makes me feel gross. These characters are iconic examples of millenial internet culture, and looking back on them, they make me revolted to remember who they were, how they were. I printed out some of these comics and had them in my schoolbooks. I quoted them. I probably still do, without realising the source of the phrases lingering still in my head.

I recoil from Piro, even remembering my time as a depressed boy who wanted to be prettier than I was and wished Girls Would Just Appreciate How Different I Was. I see the way that his behaviour and thoughts all seem to reflect a disdain for the women around him, and the way he used selfishness and indulgence as an excuse to treat his friends badly. Largo is meant to be the relief from Piro, and he makes me gamerphobic. Someone who has nothing in his life but Being A L337 G4M3R, whose ability to even process emotion is morphed around that, obsessed with his interests in a way that harms other people, and constantly seeking alcohol.

When viewed as page after page of a single text it’s very hard to think of Megatokyo very well. The characters are dreadful, and you sort of need to make excuses for them to put up with them long enough to watch the character development. They were rough, self-insert characters of thoughtless men, they can’t help it, how were they supposed to be good at storytelling?

There are two things in this comic, in the first five hundred strips that stand out now, in hindsight as needing particular explanation. Firstly, at one point early on, Erika and Hayasaka, two Japanese girls from Japan in Japan are having a conversation, and the topic of Hayasaka’s coworker Piro comes up. Erika asks if he’s American, and Hayasaka responds with ‘I don’t know.’ Now, the specific wording there is very obviously easy – after all, any given white boy could be from Canada, Scotland, Romania, Australia, or indeed, Japan as well, there’s nothing about his appearance that makes it obvious.

But these are Japanese characters from Japan speaking in Japanese, and Japanese has a way, as a language, to signify if someone is from Japan or not, and what’s more, in Japan, it’s really obvious that people judge and assume how Japanese you are or are not, based on how you look. That Hayasaka reacts with an ‘I don’t know’ is really weird, and makes me uncomfortable because it almost feels like it’s asking a specific question, “is he white” and the answer is meant to signify “how should I be able to tell?”

It’s a recurrent thing with how people talk about perceiving Piro, the character. He’s seen as female by a mind-warping AI in an MMORPG, a group of girls describe him as attractive (but also a lady), and the Erika moment leave me feeling like this character, in some tiny way, is meant to be a very obviously white boy, who can somehow be seen, in Japan, aracially; that he would ‘pass’ as Asian in a culture that is very aware of what that means.

Oh and one of those groups perceiving him as a ‘her’ includes a group of fifteen year old schoolgirls who are shocked to see a boy reading shojo manga. This is once again one of those things that projects that image of Japan, rather than being set in Japan, because lots of boys buy Shojo manga, it would not be an oddity that children gawp at. But it does let us chain into the other thing that I cannot stop thinking about:

Piro’s Conscience stops the story and has a chat with him about how he should not find those girls attractive, because they are fifteen and he is something like 23. And that’s almost a thing that you could point to as character development, except it’s weird that he needs to be told that by an outside agent, and it’s weird that the Author would think of that as an example of a way to have this character improve. You kind of don’t tend to need to explain ‘by the way, this character is not a sex criminal.’

But okay, the story says ‘Piro will not have sex with that teenager, as a point of ethical growth.’ Cool, not the example I’d leap to but I’m glad they do it. But and oh no there’s a but – but, they then have other characters remark on that, and there’s a plot arc about ‘oh no, what if this teenager hits on him?’

Yeah, what if?

What if this character who is definitely not a sex criminal now, because that’s a thing that the plot said he wasn’t, gets invited to do a sex crime? Well, maybe he’d do it? Because that character development is uncertain? Which means he’s probably a sex criminal, really?

These are the things that make me wonder about the Author of Megatokyo. It makes me wonder, as with other works before it, why would you bring that up?

It’s hard not to be bitter about Megatokyo. Megatokyo was wildly successful on the con circuit, it had printed books and cosplayers and the creators in the first year of the comic’s life went from ‘nobodies with a comic’ to ‘celebrity guests at major conventions.’ And this is in that period where of 121 strips, 38 were just empty filler. There was a lightning strike of it all, and I know that impacts how I feel about it in hindsight. We were hanging on to see the plot developments? From this? At that point? A year in, knowing that twenty-one years later, many of those initial plot points are dangling or forgotten?

But, and now I’d like to talk about Fred Gallagher the person, and not The Author of Megatokyo. I think Fred Gallagher received a special kind of torment that only capitalism can truly give. In a fair or sensible world, Fred wouldn’t need to do this art in a way that generated revenue; he’d be able to do it in his free time when he wanted to and release it at a schedule that pleased him and find a stable feedback loop that worked for him, all while his other needs were met. He wouldn’t need to work as an architect, then as a bus driver, in order to make ends meet while he pushed on with Megatokyo, a thing that he can manage to update maybe twice a month with a single page, often a page full of wordswordswords.

Megatokyo got successful in a capitalist way, and it demanded that in order it work, it had to be consistent, it needed attention, it needed monetisation, it needed to be a hustle, and the result of it really looks like every part of that sucks. Gallagher has written about being a temperamental writer and artist, and doesn’t that bear out in a work which could have months of breaks between its haphazardly crafted plot beats?

Megatokyo is a project that could benefit now with a good editor going through a draft manuscript and saying ‘hey, is this not important? Maybe we get rid of this’ or ‘what are we doing with this?’ and maybe ‘a few less jokes about the fifteen year old flirting with an adult, perhaps?’ and then letting the perfectionist who wanted to drive the story come back through that process and engage with it in its own time. It doesn’t need to be a commercial platform that justifies its existence; it could be a shed project, something someone who loves it does to work on it a little at a time.

But it isn’t.

And the demands of making A Business, a Brand, are clearly things that really hurt its actual existence. The more upset and the more struggle that Gallagher has to go through to make it, the less likely it seems to me that it gets made. That’s the story of what happened to the visual novel (which still shocks me in that it seems like it’d be very easy to get something out, but which now, all that money has dried up).

Gallagher has a patreon. It pays for Megatokyo and it pays for his other webtoon work, which seems driven by improvisation and speed. It gets updated a fair bit more often than Megatokyo with more coherent, directed sequences. I do not wish ill of this man, and for all that I wish the culture had venerated something else, uplifted someone else, I do not want this project to be a failure, to be gone. I’d like it to be better – boy, I’d like it to be better, such as discarding all the jokes about the fifteen year old flirting with an adult, could we please stop that.

But it’s hard sometimes to think about it, about the unfairness that this got to be a Cultural Touchstone where someone nearly twenty years older than me got to be one of ‘the voices’ of my cultural space, and where now he gets to continue making a page or two a month, while some of my friends have to negotiate ‘groceries or rent’ problems with their online presences and the art they give away.

Is Megatokyo, the project, worth a few thousand a month? I mean, yeah, absolutely.

But it doesn’t seem fair to me that this project, this project, limping along over twenty two years to tell a story that is awkward and illformed and thoughtless and selfish and indulgent and focused on some characters who are kinda rotten assholes, gets to be the place where the cyberpunk dystopia is unevently distributed.

There’s an impulse to pull the punch here, or to be crueller. That somehow I should either be kind enough because Gallagher’s been through a lot (and he has! I don’t mean to downplay any of the realities of Being The Megatokyo Guy!) or be able to lay a knockout punch on the work and get rid of it, which, no, of course not; Gallagher should be happily working on this project in his own time in a way that appeals to him, it doesn’t have to go anywhere or have a goal. In this house we don’t do disrespectful teleologies. Maybe I should be ‘aw shucks, well, that Piro learns his lesson after four straight years of narrative,’ but to get there I have to slog through twenty two years of archives, most of which is irrelevant and boring.

Ah well.

Make art, make rent, help others do the same. And helping others make art can be stuff like reading your friends’ work, and asking them if they want to do things differently, or better, or with fewer jokes about flirting with underaged girls.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

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yhwhrulz · 29 days

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Worthy Brief - August 23, 2024

It's all in His wonderful timing!

Judges 13:6 So the woman came and told her husband, saying, "A Man of God came to me, and His countenance was like the countenance of the Angel of God, very awesome; but I did not ask Him where He was from, and He did not tell me His name. 17 Then Manoah said to the Angel of the Lord, "What is Your name, that when Your words come to pass we may honor You?" 18 And the Angel of the Lord said to him, "Why do you ask My name, seeing it is wonderful?" 21 When the Angel of the Lord appeared no more to Manoah and his wife, then Manoah knew that He was the Angel of the Lord. 22 And Manoah said to his wife, "We shall surely die, because we have seen God!"

The children of Israel were delivered into the hands of the Philistines for 40 years for doing evil in the sight of YHVH. Then a wonderful event takes place: an announcement to a barren and childless woman that she will conceive and bear a son. The announcement is given by one who is called "malach-YHVH", literally "Angel (of) YHVH. This messenger, in two separate appearances, reveals God's commandments concerning the boy to be born. At the angel's behest, the couple offers a sacrifice to YHVH, then they ask to be told his name.

What happens next opens the eyes of the woman's husband, Manoah. The angel asks why do they desire his name for it is, "פלאי", a Hebrew word translated variously as, "miraculous", "wonderous", "supremely wonderful", "secret", "beyond understanding", and a word seeming to be used as both an adjective and a noun. But then, as the flame of their sacrifice blazes up from the altar toward heaven, this angel of YHVH ascends in the flame! At this, Manoah exclaims to his wife, "We are doomed to die! We have seen God!" From this, we conclude that the Image of God, the pre-incarnate Yeshua has once again appeared to His beloved servants for deliverance at a critical moment in the history of His people Israel.

Forty years, often described as a number of testing, a long season during which time the Lord allows the sins of His people to produce their inevitable fruit of judgment and subjugation. Then, at His chosen moment, our God returns for deliverance. And He returns in Person, with unequivocal authority and deep wonder.

Pete, are you also wondering, "When will God show up!?" The story of the birth of Samson may hold an answer. God will show up precisely when His time of testing has been accomplished! And when He does, you may need to deal with the divine impact of His revelation, and as you worship Him, stand in awe of how "absolutely and supremely wonderful" He is. So, don't be impatient during the time of testing. The deliverance and the wonder will be well worth the wait.

Have a great weekend … Shabbat Shalom!

Your family in the Lord with much agape love,

George, Baht Rivka, Obadiah and Elianna (Missouri) (Baltimore, MD)

Editor's Note: During this war, we have been live blogging throughout the day -- sometimes minute by minute on our Telegram channel. - https://t.me/worthywatch/ Be sure to check it out!

Editor's Note: Dear friends — we are now booking in the following states. Ohio, Kentucky, Michigan, Indiana, West Virginia, Tennessee! If you know Rabbis, Pastors or Leaders who might be interested in powerful Israeli style Hebrew/English worship and a refreshing word from Worthy News about what’s going on in the land, please let us know how to connect with them and we will do our best to get you on our schedule! You can send an email to george [ @ ] worthyministries.com for more information.

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thepitofjob · 3 months

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Job 5: 1-7. "The Gambol."

The speech of Eliphaz the Temanite "learning is golden" continues with a discussion of the Bar Mitzvah. A Bar Mitzvah is not the moment you star in a variety show featuring your own choreography. Bar Mitzvah means "obligated to the prairie", it is the "Rite of the Committed Man."

The Number for the term is 1431, ידגא‎, yadga, "where Ya fishes." The final verse explains why the time spent in the school - like sparks of lightning, ignorance and wickedness will rise from the soil of Adam without the knowledge found in the Torah.

Following are seven sins an education in the Shule addresses using the words of Moses:

“Call if you will, but who will answer you? To which of the holy ones will you turn? 2 Resentment kills a fool, and envy slays the simple. 3 I myself have seen a fool taking root, but suddenly his house was cursed. 4 His children are far from safety, crushed in court without a defender. 5 The hungry consume his harvest, taking it even from among thorns, and the thirsty pant after his wealth. 6 For hardship does not spring from the soil, nor does trouble sprout from the ground. 7 Yet man is born to trouble as surely as sparks fly upward.

The Values in Gematria are:

v. 1: Who will answer you?

The call is the Call of the Hour. The Shule is the only institution on earth that is dedicated to the release of man from slavery, oppression, and poverty just because the Torah says this is what we must do. Anyone who calls out for release from oppression will have an ear in the Shule. Fear of being enslaved, tortured, misused, or abandoned by society is far too common. When the fear becomes too realistic, the Rab says a Jew has less than an hour to take action.

The Number is 9562, טההב‎ ‎, tahab, "be fond of other people."

v. 2: Resentment kills a fool. The Number is 2889, ב‎חחט‎, "the nose ring. At once!"

v. 3: I have seen a fool taking root. The Number is 4886, דחחו‎, "rejected, too pushy." = no outbursts, no cloudy judgement.

Pushing in a positive way is also called makkah:

"The noun מכה (makka), literally a striking or a smiting. This is the catch-all word for a beat (Deuteronomy 25:3), wound (1 Kings 22:35, Proverbs 20:30), slaughter (1 Samuel 4:10), plague (1 Samuel 4:8), and so on."

I have said angels are the ultimate pushers, which they are, but they take their own time and one must follow the prescribed methods for studying the Torah which I spent a great deal of time on in the prior frames.

To be too pushy is to read the Torah or become too arrogant just because one is following the rules without following through.

The term "strike" is also used in tandem with a push. Moses was said to strike the rock in order to convince the Israelites freedom was not only necessary, it was not going to be easy. Moses itself "Water of Es" the "saturation with knowledge" was going to require a journey which was just beginning.

Observe:

Mos=

"Verb נשא (nasa') describes an upward motion, generally of something that is being pulled up and out so as to remove it. This verb occurs very often and can usually be translated with (1) to lift or lift up, (2) to bear or carry, and (3) to take or take away.

An identical verb (or rather the same one used in a specialized way) means to loan on interest. The practice of loaning on interest causes the principal sum to slowly but surely evaporate and was prohibited under Mosaic law. A third identical verb (or again the same one) means to deceive or beguile.

Noun משאת (mas'et) reflects all nuances of the parent verb: uprising (of smoke), uplifting (of hands), utterance (of an oracle), a burden or that what's carried. Noun נשיא (nasi') describes a lifted-up one, i.e. (1) a captain or chief, or (2) a mist or vapor. Note this keenly observed connection between paying interest and being formally governed.

Noun משאה (massa'a), describes clouds. It's spelled the same as the noun משאה (mashsha'a), a loan. (It's also spelled the same as משאה, mesho'a, ruin or desolation, from the whole other verb שוא, shw'). Noun משא (mashsha) means a lending on interest. Noun משאון (mashsha'on) means guile. Plural noun משואות (mashshu'ot) means deceptions.

Noun משא (massa') means (1) a load or burden, or (2) utterance or oracle. Noun שיא (si') means loftiness or pride. Noun שאת (se'et) means dignity, swelling or outburst, a rising-up. This noun is spelled the same as שאת (she't), ruin or devastation, from the verb שאה (sha'a), to be noisy or ruinous.

The verb נשה (nasha) is a specialized form of the previous. It either means to lend on interest or to forget, or rather to have a memory slowly evaporate away. Noun נשיה (neshiya) means forgetfulness or oblivion. Noun נשי (neshi) means debt. Noun משה (mashshe) means loan, and is spelled identical to the following.

Verb משה (masha) means to draw or draw out, and appears to specifically describe a drawing out of waters: to extract from water." There are very close analogies to the fact a boy needs wood to make the water. Very strange:

Es=

The common Semitic masculine noun עץ ('es), primarily meaning tree. Our noun is used to denote a single standing tree (Genesis 2:9), or a group of trees (Genesis 2:16). It is used to denote wood for kindling (Joshua 9:23), wood as a building material (Genesis 6:14, 2 Kings 12:13), and items made of wood (Exodus 7:19, Deuteronomy 19:5). And hence it may be used to denote (wooden) idols (Deuteronomy 4:28) or gallows, stake or similar means of execution (Genesis 40:19, Deuteronomy 21:22). The theological meaning of the Biblical tree (from the two trees in Paradise related to the fall of man, to the cross of Christ, to the restored Tree of Life as witnessed by John the Revelator - REVELATION 22:2) seem to promote a relationship with the verb עוץ ('us) meaning to counsel or regard.

The feminine noun עצה ('esa), meaning trees collectively. This noun occurs only once, in Jeremiah 6:6.

v. 4: His children are crushed in court. Cross-referencing must reveal the Bar is able to express himself well regarding the words of Moses but whose efforts cannot be chastised. The Number is 3606, ג‎ואֶפֶסו, geofesso, "press and squeeze the body."

The forces of nature are going to press the body. If the mind does not crush them before they do something irrational, that is called trouble. It is best if trouble is addressed in the Shule first.

v. 5: The hungry consume his harvest. Persons who learn to obey the Torah will achieve Shabbos long before persons who test the limits. Before Shabbos is what is called Shabbar, "tending the field":

"The masculine noun שבוע (shabbua'), indicating a period of seven. This seven can be days (Genesis 29:27, Deuteronomy 16:9) or years (Ezekiel 21:28).

At some point, the masculine noun שבע (sheba') turned into the verb שבע (shaba'), meaning to swear or take an oath. It occurs 184 times in the Bible, most notably in the Beersheba incident, where Abraham and Abimelech swear peace and Abraham marks this by surrendering seven ewes to his friend (Genesis 21:28).

BDB Theological Dictionary explains the connection between these two separate meanings by explaining the act of swearing with seven oneself, or bind oneself by seven things. Of course, the most predominant usage of the number seven is in the creation week. It's always been a mystery where the Jewish week came from — the day, the month and the year are all references to cosmological phenomena, but the week appears to be a strictly theological expression. By creating everything in seven days, God takes an oath (also read our studies on the creation week.)

The verb שבע (shaba'), meaning to swear, yields two derivatives, although these are probably the same word spelled slightly different: the feminine nouns שבועה (shebu'a) and שבעה (shebu'a - which is spelled identical to the feminine version of 7, but pronounced slightly different), both meaning an oath (Exodus 22:10, Deuteronomy 7:8), and once a curse (Isaiah 65:15)."

The Number is 6524, וה‎בד‎, "the textile". The Beersheba must be woven together into one frame of mind about how society should work. Together, they are in fact considered one Mitzvah, the Mitzvah of Universal Morality.

So in addition to pressing, striking, tending, swearing and promising, now we know we have twisting and weaving to do. All of these similes and metaphors refer to the malleability of the mind during adolescence. Pressure during this time results in effortlessness later on in life. The reverse is not at all true.

v. 6: Hardship does not spring from the soil. Yes, it does. The moment Adam meets Evil, trouble springeth. Man and humanity are not meant to be without Shabbar, the Seven Days of Tilling.

Should one Shab the Bar, however, wisdom instead of trouble will sprout. The Number is 3485, גדחה‎ ‎, thirsty gaddah, "the thirsty are lopped off."

This is also not necessarily true. Many stupid and insolent persons are successful in the world. Some are even blissfully happy and do not practice religion or pray or do anything good or nice. So are they lopped off or not? Is there any point to this at all?

v. 7: Yet man is born to trouble as surely as sparks fly upward.

The Number is 4433, םד‎לג‎, sadleg, "the gambol". Man makes leaps forward only when he is reassured he will be happy. This is the essence of the Mashiach. The Mashiach states there will come a time when man will stop causing his own demise because it is appropriate to do so and it is obvious his happiness depends on it.

While it is true some filthy crackwhores like Donald Trump and his friends are free and happy to do whatever they want, most of the world is experiencing deep despair. So far it has not found the will to respond to this. Instead it is waiting for someone else to do something about it.

Because of this the world is burning down. The tract concludes if we expect as Jews to be a part of a happy world, we must observe the Beersheba, and teach them to as many people as possible all around the world. Mankind must believe these Seven Laws were given by God for the good of the human race and the place we inhabit and it is the job of the Shule to ensure it believes and understands this is true.

On a planet that is failing to observe the God given Commandment to establish and operate courts of law, Beersheba #7 as is happening in America with the greatest threat to the Jewish people since Hitler, belief in God is going to fall shy.

#chabad #chabad.org

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ulfrsmal · 1 year

Note

2 & 22 & 24 for the violence ask game

Hello! This is for the fandom in my pfp; I'm not naming anything to avoid maximum violence.

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

Welp my fave is the Main Character and his Pretty Boys, and I think they all switch... BUT. I can give an argument to why the Sickly King never doms (as opposed to never tops, given that he has children and has therefore Topped. But I don't think he was leading the fun let us say).

Powerful as he is in his day-to-day life, at least in matters of war and state, the bedroom is another story entirely. He wants to please his wife the Queen, and she's a force to be reckoned with; folding under her desire is both easy and pleasurable. His illness spares him from flare-ups because he's not exerting himself, she's right at home over him -- figuratively and literally --, and any sin he incurs in by letting her top can be prayed away. Most often with her on her knees at his side in front of the cross in their palace's private chapel. It is simply the perfect arrangement!

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

A fact I wish more mlm Main Character writers could incorporate into their work: Big Tall Surly Englishman was Main Character's first real male crush back in the first season. They're as canon as can be in the books too!

Though I have to say that my corner of this fandom is blessed in this regard, we don't tend to forget important bits!

24. topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

OHOHOHOHOHO. This is the question that, had you asked me on reddit, would have prompted me to go on a literal neon*zi hunting spree. By which I mean blocking and reporting if it applies. Anyway, it's the Heathenry history part. Especially when tied to "historical accuracy". This type of show tends to attract a very specific type of asshole, and I can spot them at first glance. For those unaware but curious, the checklist goes something like this:

white man

norse pagan ("odinist" and "folkish" are literal neon*zi terms; "asatru" is one that should be examined more carefully)

really into viking history

the valknut symbol. thor's hammer and the helm of awe are the only other valid symbols

Odin Thor and Freyr are the only gods and if you worship Loki you're evil and if you worship any other god (eg Baldr) you're weak. Freya is there to be the goddess of love but never of war and she's always placed below Odin Thor and her literal twin brother Freyr

"the show can't be accurate because it must be politically correct for people to like it", "there were no black people in viking scandinavia" (factually wrong btw)

Also check any and all numbers in pfps, profiles, discord number IDs, etc. There are some associated with n*zism, eg eighty-eight & fourteen-eight eight.

On a more general note, if you suspect someone but aren't sure, other common themes are:

fan of Skyrim whose fave in-game race is the Nords

likes historical figures for their war achievements. even if the figure did civilian things, eg improved agriculture or made trade deals. even if the figure isn't well-known for the war efforts. if there is any military connection, they will like that and see value in only that

interest in military history and ONLY that (the biggest red flag is WW2 but I've also seen WW1, north-american wars, etc.)

metalhead super into black metal who won't accept any "posers" (aka metalheads who aren't into the same subgenres/bands). may or may not condone and/or agree with the likes of varg vikernes (who has done some truly vile things I'd have to Trigger Warning in here. look that up with discretion. there are MANY real-life horror stories in the history of black metal).

When in doubt, block preventively!!

#anyway. i ranted A LOT in that last question. sorry to whoever asked me this; I realise this is most likely not what you had in mind #i am simply sick and tired of those types getting a platform. so if i can spread the checklist i go through. i will.#the discord id point will be moot once they introduce the change they are announcing i think; but as of the writing of this answer it appli #anonymous #thank you for asking me #(oh and. yes. i realise i am a norse pagan metalhead into viking media who knows a bit about military history. i know i seem a red flag.#up to you if you wanna block me too. i do NOT condone or share those views in any way but words only go so far so feel free to block me too

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tsukasageorge · 2 years

Note

char ask meme for whichever oc you think ill like most. all numbers minus any you dont feel like answering

fukc yeah thanks nico. idk which oc you'd like though... personally i like nyx bc theyre silly but saturn and ben are emo. you like illumi so maybe jol or kanz.... ill just answer with whoever lol

Does your character have siblings or family members in their age group? Which one are they closest with?

i'll go with joel & kanz for this one bc they have a very big 'family' (its a cult, they are part of a cult). kanzy has a biological sister who's about 3-4 years younger than them?? but i believe the closest ages are lizzy and jolzy, they're like 22-25 i dont remember What is/was your character’s relationship with their mother like?

an time i hear the word 'mother' + 'oc' i think of stella. her relationship with her mother is literally so bad lmao What is/was your character’s relationship with their father like?

i'll go with saturn for this! his father choked him to death lol In what situation was your character the most afraid they’ve ever been?

i can't decide of a character for this one but half of them are dead so like. probably when they were dying Which does your character idealize most: happiness or success?

ben: success

stella: she used to prioritize success but she kinda figured that was never gonna happen so now its happiness

nyx: happiness

kanz: happiness

jol: success

saturn: justice Is your character more likely to admire wisdom, or ambition in others?

ben: wisdom

lyra: ambition

kanz: probabl wisdom What is your character’s biggest relationship flaw? Has this flaw destroyed relationships for them before?

oh hell yeah

ben: he's ridiculously self-sacrifical. he's always looking for validation and will give up his own comfort and sanity to appear 'perfect'. so he seems obnoxious & he also will shoulder every single bit of despair by himself

nyx: they just do whatever the fuck they want. like they disappeared for 3 years, didn't leave a note or anything, just said Fuck This Shit Im Out. they let their whole kingdom believe they were dead bc why would they deal with that shit when there are literally dragons. also they're irresponsible as hell

jol: he's a clown. also he's in a cult In what ways does your character compare themselves to others? Do they do this for the sake of self-validation, or self-criticism?

ben tries to make sure he's better than everyone so it's both If something tragic or negative happens to your character, do they believe they may have caused or deserved it, or are they quick to blame others?

i know i have at least one cahracter who is guilty as hell but i cant remember who What does your character like in other people?

stella like girls What does your character dislike in other people?

nyx hates people who are uptight/rule based, anyone who will yell at them for being an impulsive shithead How quick is your character to trust someone else?

jol can't trust anyone outside of his gotdamn cult. kanz got out of the cult and decided to room with the first 3 people they found, so i guess they're pretty trusting... lyra i feel is pretty trusting as well. she doesn't have many friends, but the ones she does have are cool.

How quick is your character to suspect someone else? Does this change if they are close with that person?

im treating this as a 'there's a murder mystery, who figures out the killer first' question. nyx is probably the victim. lyra is coping with nyx's murder by writing a real life fanfic in the basement. stella's distraught as hell but she's leading the investigation & trying to make sure no one else gets hurt. ben is in his room crying. he is not involved in the murders because he is locked in his room lol. kanz suspects jol from the moment they find the body. the murderer is jol. he runs away to new york and saturn hunts him for sport How does your character behave around children?

joel would be popular with children ebcause he's a clown How does your character normally deal with confrontation?

joel likes to kill people How quick or slow is your character to resort to physical violence in a confrontation?

joel likes to kill people What did your character dream of being or doing as a child? Did that dream come true?

stella wanted to be straight. she is not What does your character find repulsive or disgusting?

their own families probably In the face of criticism, is your character defensive, self-deprecating, or willing to improve?

ben: he fucking dies

stella: she doestn give a shit anymore

joel: he does not get criticism he is moms baby boy. but he likes being berated bc he aspires to be a piece of shit

kanz: 'oh my god you're so right' How does your character behave around people they dislike?

at the beginning stella just plays along with them but she learns how to properly reject middle aged men :) Is your character more likely to remove a problem/threat, or remove themselves from a problem/threat?

they are the problem How does your character treat people in service jobs?

all of them are nice except for jol who is just annoying Does your character feel that they deserve to have what they want, whether it be material or abstract, or do they feel they must earn it first?

ben does not have 'wants' he has a kingdom to rule. stella is beginning to realize she is deserving of cool shit. nyx thinks they are deserving of cool shit bc the shits cool. jol has no cool shit. kanz needs to earn their place. lyra doesnt think about that stuff. How easy or difficult is it for your character to say “I love you?” Can they say it without meaning it?

depends. jol can say 'i love you' to anyone because he was raised in Manipulation Central and they manipulate people. stella cannot say 'i love you' to your face but she will admit it while crying in nyx's arms. nyx doesn't say 'i love you' they let you cry about some hot girl in their arms. kanz can say i love you easily. ben does not say 'i love you' ever, except maybe to stella once. oh ben and stella are siblings btw What does your character believe will happen to them after they die? Does this belief scare them?

stella: i am going 2 hell

nnyx: if i die i die like who cares lmfao

lyra: death is terrifying to me. it doesn't matter where i go because the idea of being trapped somewhere for eternity is hell either way. i wont be able to control it. i'll leave my loved ones behind. i'll just waste away in a cage. if nothing happens after i die and i just cease to exist i'll be grateful

jol: if i die i die like who cares lmfao

#asks <3 #long post #sorry for the same 4 characters #i have like no ocs i actually like

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seancamerons · 2 years

Text

I posted 3,271 times in 2022

That's 791 more posts than 2021!

175 posts created (5%)

3,096 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@highzaya-blog1

@maya-matlin

@pinkprincess

@perrfectly

@ambitious-playmate

I tagged 1,319 of my posts in 2022

#q - 273 posts

#degrassi - 190 posts

#stranger things - 152 posts

#art - 113 posts

#britney spears - 87 posts

#fashion - 83 posts

#oth - 76 posts

#food - 52 posts

#semma - 52 posts

#emma nelson - 28 posts

Longest Tag: 127 characters

#so different time eras play a role in the art created at that time or is a response to or deeply influenced by what is going on

My Top Posts in 2022:

Zig/Maya in Wild and Weary 💜 requested by @maya-matlin

15 notes - Posted November 22, 2022

talking about season 2 episodes 12 and 13 titled white wedding gets me super warm and fuzzy and nostalgic. overall it's an underrated one and most people don't like it I'm sure because the parents have a larger role than the teens which i can see how that could be a downer.

i'm putting this under a cut so you can read it at your leisure. took me long enough eh?

so yeah white wedding is my favorite episode and this ep had everything you could want, a big event being the wedding spike finding out she's pregnant again, this time days before the main event, we have jt and toby hijinks with the fancy plot, joey and caitlin flirting pretty much all episode, manny playing matchmaker and of course the at the time long-awaited reunion of semma. i remember i recorded it on my VCR in my room back in the day when it aired and even now it's my favorite episode.

so we begin with sean, jt, manny and toby in the media immersion room about to listen to a speech about love and marriage but its acutally the theme of a show called the love boat.

"someone's never been in love" sean says when jt acts love makes him wanna throw up and then they assume he means he's been in love before and they all assume it's emma because at that time yes it makes sense.

getting back to sean, he's always been on the outside looking in despite being a member of the original 6 it's important to note that he knew he was the only one not invited to the wedding and when manny invites him it's as if he'd come into the fold by the invitation so i think that was another reason why he was crushed, because he wanted to be a part of it and manny gave him an in and took it away. i expected him to disappointed or sad but literally sniffling and tearing up made me feel bad for him. boy had it bad. lol @ tracker eating out of a pot. of course they play 'the sean music' which is a guitar i believe but they play it whenever something happens to sean or whenever he's on screen i don't get it but it's something i observed over the years. sean music also could be attributed to emma and sean's relationship at least in season 1 so that's i guess something to note.

moving on, so emma's home from school. she recieved the wedding cake which was swapped by mistake. i couldn't help but note spike and emma's dynamic is somewhat codependent and sisterly. very candid can talk about whatever and they're comfortable about it. spike doesn't want to change the relationship and sees nothing wrong with it. even when what happens is inappropriate, spike shouldn't tell emma about her pregnancy and abortion, a conversation more suitable for an adult being snake. spike shouldn't have to rely on a 13 year old for support when she knows she has her friends around is all i'm saying.

elsewhere, jt, toby and craig scheme to get a stripper to come to the 'stag'. who calls a bachelor party a stag? i guess only in canada lmao they try to go but they obviously look juvenile so craig ditches them pretty much and goes to joey.

fun fact: the address on the strip club door is 212 the number of the episode in pt 1.

so caitlin and lucy come over and they decided to wear the same dress to the wedding which makes sense since they're bridesmaids but of course they're here to party so they go to this weird place with mexican singers which idk the song they're singing so if there's symbolism who knows? but spike aint in the party mood.

fun fact: lucy wears the same outfit in the series premire '1.01 mother child reunion'.

also that scene when joey and snake come over with lucy and caitlin over somethings to note starting with, "when are you gonna add a little spike and snake to add to mini caitlin over there?" it's a funny little nod to the original series, that emma was coined by lucy as mini-caitlin because it's true! after all, caitlin interfered with spike's pregnancy back in the day on degrassi junior high when she famously wrote an opinion piece in favor of keeping spike at degrassi despite the angry parents who wanted to ban spike from school due to her pregnancy. emma too has the tendency to stick her nose where it doesn't belong and this very episode is no exception somewhat following in caitlin's footsteps in this very episode and others at the time. it was pretty obvious that emma was written to be much like caitlin in the mix of characters from the og degrassi. emma has always liked and looked up to caitlin and was seen in 1.01 mother child reunion to be a fan of ryan's planet, caitlin's environmental television show and took shitty romantic advise from her espy as well.

nearing the end of part one, it's worth noting that yes, spike's secret wasn't emma's to tell but spike should've known better to talk to a friend of hers not her 13-14 year old daughter. spike makes it seems like snake would abandon her or not help out when we know snake isn't like that. i guess she did talk to caitlin and caitlin gives notoriously bad advice and says, "call him in the morning." like he should know five seconds before they get married or whatever. i guess they didn't think 'mini caitlin' would wake up in the middle of the night and spill the beans to him as if she was sent by spike. wtf?

fun fact: at the party, mr raditch wants everyone to call him dan lol irl the actors name is dan as well.

poor toby gets his hand stepped on but i have a lot of feelings about snake and emma's talk outside when he yells at her but, he had a point that spike should've told him not her, "why you why not your mom?" but the remark, "what kind of family is this?" was a tough blow.

so then - we got a pissy emma in the morning, manny when she's not sucking heilium explains that emma did fuck up and she should feel bad. emma goes off and sees sean in her pjs and tracker is trying to phase sean as they talk. words cannot describe how much i love that emma went to sean and she invited him to the wedding.

meanwhile spike and snake are talking rightfully so on some boardwalk pier thing. snake remarks, "yeah as friends, maybe we should've kept it that way." but it reminds us that they started out as friends, and she should've been able to tell him things no matter how weird or complicated especially since they were about to be married.

the directors cut always cuts out jaitlin's discussion about their past engagement. spike is late as usual, a nod to 'it's late' from degrassi junior high and her pregnancy in this ep and current situation nice. i love how they reference the original series.

joey catching the bouquet and him lament that he plans, makes me wonder if the show was going to explore a real take on marriage between jaitlin. so the 'slow song' playing at this time is titled just jane by christopher rouse which i scoured the internet way back in 2003 for it and didn't get a real download of it until this cd degrassi released with all their background songs on it. i doubt it's available anymore but my friend at the time had it and ripped it and sent me a bunch of the songs like 'heartbreaker' 'get it right this time' and some others.

getting back to the final scene emma discovers sean came to the wedding and the rest is history. the end scene made degrassi crash course on the-n as most intense moment but also it's probably the most romantic because it seems so genuine. and that's a wrap on white wedding. i also would like to mention, if anyone has seen sixteen candles with molly ringwald there's a stark similarity in the dress samantha baker wears and what emma nelson wears. if you know you know if you don't sean is like the 'jake ryan' waiting outside the church or in emma's case under the tree. i only recently made the connection, someone made a post about it but now it's my favorite little thing to think about when i watch this episode and that's all i'm gonna say about that.

17 notes - Posted March 15, 2022

See the full post

17 notes - Posted February 24, 2022

Craig Manning + Singing the Praises of Locked Briefcases requested by anon

22 notes - Posted July 8, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i rarely do this anymore or whatever but let's talk about degrassi season 2 episodes 1 and 2 when doves cry and how it's probably one of the best dtng episodes not just maybe dtng but in the entire franchise.

yes i'm aware it's kinda old and most people don't care but I was watching when doves cry on pluto's degrassi channel last night and I can't help but remark, it's one of the very best. if degrassi had a greatest hits that showcased all the gems this is on the tracklist without a doubt.

as you all know or should know s2 is a strong season and underrated af. as sad and heart breaking the episode(s) are it has aged remarkably well at least the a plot. (side eyes paige attire which dramatically dates the episode)

its almost perfect how Angela is seen to be interested in dinosaurs Craig tells him about the dinosaur (being Albert) that hurts him and then Angela clad in little dinosaur pajamas was able to recall what she had seen. i do like it when degrassi does 'dark' subject matter but this episode is the first episode that really showcases it well.

I've seen this episode so many times and yet I never put 2 and 2 together with the pajamas but it was a nice touch in direction with that attention to detail.

I also had this thought too so Albert found Craig's photo album that had that "perfect family" mash-up picture with Craig, Joey and Angela and inside the book with other pics of Angela and Joey he had taken and I can't help but wonder if Albert lashed out at Craig bc he had hurt feelings regarding his photo book it all came to a head for Albert and that turned to anger and rage as if he shouldn't care about joey and angela bc he is his father not joey and they are associated with his ex who left him whom despite her death he is bitter about.

its important to note craig and alberts rocky relationship was strained long before but the reminders of the past get to Albert. Such as when Craig mentions mom at dinner and he violently throws the plate something in that tells me it's not the first time or would be the last time such a thing would happen. I'm not defending Alberts behavior but even the part where Albert turns and just seeing him look over at Craig when he was on the floor after he beat him in the darkroom as if he felt bad for what he had done after the fact when it's too late and wanted to say something but stopped himself. There's a lot of subtext and the direction really did an excellent job of showing rather than telling you the story.

It's such a well-done episode and if you'd like to show a person who's never seen dtng show them that one. I always struggle with what's a good one to show someone?

With the subplot there's some relief from the dark subject matter but it's one of the top season premieres that gives you chills from the acting the direction camera and more. It has a bittersweet ending with Craig standing up against his dad and ultimately moving in with Joey and freezes on Craig looking back at him as he drives away.

A+

31 notes - Posted March 8, 2022

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brascu · 2 years

Text

warning for spoilers from season 3

alright, I believe Klaus is gonna get fucked next season an here is why

when he meets his father in the void, Reginald tells him he is his greatest dissapointment and that he wanted him to live to up to his full potential.

Later, in season 3, when Klaus is able to catch that ball, he says that “now he’s ready”. Ready for what? Klaus asks, and Reginald takes him to the cemetery where he admits he made Klaus so traumatized so he could control him.

He says with all letters that Klaus was the most important child to learn how to control his powers. (season 1)

And all through seasons, Klaus is the closest to his father. Every timeline.

But then we go back to season 3 when Reginald locks him outside the tunnel. Why? after fully comprehending his powers, Klaus didn’t have a chance to use them. Why would Reginald bother training him? why would he rush to do so? Why only him?

If locking him outside was by chance, he wouldn’t have said those lines. “You’re more trouble than you’re worth”. The greates potential is more trouble than he’s worth? bite me. Why would he run off with him to train as the word crumbled??

I’ve already said in another post, but I believe the tunnel couldn’t handle more than “the shaman and the seven”. And Klaus was the only one able to get inside of oblivion by himself. Maybe it was a bet, but maybe it wasn’t. After all, when they’re getting on top of the sigil, He again uses Klaus so Allison could be out of there. I believe she was supposed to kill him and save the others.

But then we go back to the cemetery, where Klaus was able to conquer those ghosts. Really nice that scene, but terrible useless, no? What he does with Luther, calling him to fight, he had already done with Ben in season 1. What does Reginald really wants from Klaus’s powers?

At this point, I believe Klaus really is the most powerful Umbrella, and probably the smartest one as well. Luther’s leadership? Klaus leads hords of ghosts. Diego’s long distance and furtivity? Klaus can get anywhere without raising suspicion, can shoot and again, can use the dead. Allison’s rumours? Klaus has +5 in charisma and is really good at manipulating people. Five’s agility? Klaus literally can’t die, who cares about bullets? Also, he understood ans was ok with time travel in his first time. Ben’s tentacles? Ben6 could only materialize at his will and Ben2 is a coward. Viktor’s sounds? pretty much they’ve been used for blowing things up? the thing with the kugelblitz was nice but it didn’t work. (I know I’m biased, I know)

We are always looking for number ones or sevens, but if you think four is exacly in the middle and the universe is a sucker for balance. How about someone who lives as much as he dies? Who looks for death while fearing it?

Who is so strong, but don’t fight? Who’s so irritating, but charismatic? Who’s manly and girly? Easily distracted, passionately focused, joyfully uninterested, profoundly curious?

Klaus doesn’t pay much attention to everything, but what’s important at the moment, by chance, he takes seriously. Something he found before season 1 was vital for season 3′s development. He is Reginald’s perfect little mess of intuition. And intuition is a skill that he’s trained and took him places.

I can’t wait to see what in hell that alien has stored for him. Because I know he haven’t finished what he started.

You can stop reading here if you don’t want to see me going crazy lol

(also, did you guys notice that Reginald’s notebook, when taking notes about Klaus’s deaths, had other times before the first time he killed Klaus in this timeline? 22 minutes, the time Klaus took to come back to life after the first time Reggie killed him, was not his first entry. We cannot read it, but there’s a previous note in the exact format he’s using right now.

I’m so sure Reginald can travel through dimensions or something. Specially since I saw something about a elevator in the comics, both Klaus and Ben are seen together in elevators[ben on his feet while klaus is on the floor when we have dead ben and both on their feet when Klaus and Ben2 are alive] and when we see Luther coming back from the dead [void - another dimension] he comes from an elevator.)

(and as you guys already know that I love finishing my theory dump referencing another piece of media, this time I bring you Hair - The Musical.

Klaus went back in time to the 60′s two times. In the first one, he went to the vietnam war(alone) and watched his lover die. The second one(whole family), that was before that, he became a hippie in a somewhat polyamorous life. In Hair, the play, Claud(Klaus) was part of a hippie comunity(Claud family) and ended up in vietnam(alone), where he died. Claud(Klaus) had this love triangle with Berger(Ben) and Sheila(Jill). By the end of the play, Claud dies and comes back as a spirit, but no one sees him(Ben/Dave).

The most famous song of this musical is “The Age of Aquarious”, by the band the 5th dimension. It’s said that the fourth dimention is time, what we were exploring through last three seasons. The fifth dimension would be both a level of conciousness that happens after self realization (Klaus making peace with his trauma) and please remember that when Klaus re-introduces himself to Reginald he says he is the spiritual one; or the fifth dimension would be “ is that it is a dimension unseen by humans where the forces of gravity and electromagnetism unite to create a simple but graceful theory of the fundamental forces“ (definition taken in sciencing.com). Both seem fitting for me.

The song starts with “When the moon is in the seventh house”. This all could be a coincidence, But I really don’t believe in those. or maybe I do... un coup de des...)

#klaus hargreeves #reginald hargreeves #Tua #tua season 3 #tua s3 #tua s3 theories #the umbrella academy

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idy-ll-ique · 3 years

Text

His Lovely Girl.

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x F!Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Requested: nope

Warnings: insecurity

Summary: Sebastian spoils her all the time. What has she ever done for him? When someone leaves a rude comment under her Instagram post, she can't help but rethink her entire relationship with the handsome actor.

Author's Note: Hiya peeps! We're back to Marvel lol, enjoy!

---

"I'll see you later, dove, have fun!" Y/N grinned when her boyfriend leaned over, pressing his lips to her forehead. "Bye, Seb, I'll miss you," she whispered and he looked down at her, his heart swelling in his chest, full of appreciation for her. He loved her so much. "I'll miss you too, Y/N, but I'll only be gone for around 6 hours." Y/N pouted and he couldn't help it.

He leaned over and pressed his lips to hers in a chaste kiss. "I know. Go now, I don't want to be the reason you're late." He laughed heartily when she pushed him away with a smile. "Oh, doll, everyone knows about us, they'll know anyway." With that, he waved at her and left the apartment they shared. Y/N had moved in with him 2 years into dating.

Sebastian Stan; let's just say, he was a busy man. Y/N sighed and got up from the bed, feeling hungry. They had started dating 4 years ago, and what years those were; the most blissful ones in both their lives. They loved each other to death, and they knew that. Y/N waddled into the kitchen and looked around the various cabinets, finding a box of Mac and Cheese.

It was a funny story, actually, how they met. Y/N, at the time, was working as a barista at Starbucks. One day, Sebastian had walked into the Starbucks where she worked, and she was the one who took his order. He was extremely polite, funny and a bit awkward and just like that, she fell in love with him all over again. Y/N was a Marvel geek and Sebastian had noticed.

"I really like your hoodie, doll, where'd you get it?" he had asked her after telling her his order. And she had looked down, seeing the custom-made hoodie she wore. It was black in colour, but one of the sleeves was silver and had a red star on the bicep, just like his arm from the movie Captain America: Winter Soldier.

Bucky's trigger words were printed on the front of the hoodie. She had blushed furiously, simultaneously cursing and thanking her fate and coincidence. "I had it custom made," she had told him at the time and he had grinned so wide he thought his mouth would tear open. That was the moment where he, too, realized that he was getting a crush on the pretty barista.

And he hadn't hesitated to ask her for her number. He had taken a tissue paper, scribbled his number down and had written what's yours? ;) underneath. When he went to pay for his coffee, he purposely made sure that he wasn't giving her any change. With his notes, he slid her the tissue and she took it, giving him a confused look.

When she read it, her breath hitched. While pulling out his change, she had discreetly written her number down on the tissue, saved his on her phone and had given the tissue back to him with the coins. Both of them had grinned widely at each other when he left. While walking home, he had taken out the tissue and had seen her number written neatly under his. And his heart raced, Y/N is worth it.

---

*@yn_yln posted a photo*

4,583 likes

yn_yln Mac and Cheese, anyone? :D

Y/N smiled and logged out of her Instagram account after posting the photo. She just couldn't resist; she looked good that day, one of those days where she felt confident enough to post a picture. She kept her phone away and sauntered into the sitting room to watch something on the television. An hour passed before she yawned, feeling tired.

2:05 pm, her watch displayed. Well, there's no harm in an afternoon nap, am I right? Sebastian wasn't home anyway, and it's not like she had anything to do. Grabbing her phone off the dining table, she walked into hers and Sebastian's shared bedroom, plopping down on the bed. She decided to check her Instagram before falling asleep and opened the said app.

She went through the page that displayed all the likes and comments, pausing at one comment. Her heart dropped as she clicked on the comment, her entire being filling with an uneasy feeling. You're only dating him for the money, admit it. Until then, she had never even thought… about that. Throwing her phone to the side she sat up, breathing heavily.

Y/N was currently jobless. After they started going out, she continued working at Starbucks until last year; Sebastian had suggested that she leave the job and work somewhere better, earn a higher salary. Y/N had discarded the idea at first, since the job paid enough for her to go about her daily things and where would she even find another job?

Starbucks was okay. But Sebastian wouldn't hear it. So she left the job, now jobless. She had applied to a few places but hadn't received any news as of yet. They're right. I'm living off of him. I don't even have a job. What does it look like? A broke woman dating a rich, handsome guy? Oh my God, am I leeching off his hard work? All those thoughts rushed through her head in a span of a few seconds.

The more she thought about it, the more she teared up. Blinking the tears away, she lay back down and curled up under the comfortable blankets. His blankets. She closed her eyes, trying her hardest to fall asleep but the tears were proving it to be difficult. Fortunately, she drifted off into an uneasy slumber 15 minutes later.

---

"Baby, I'm home!"

Silence. Sebastian frowned, carefully walking into the house. "Y/N?" he called out but there was no answer. Keeping the bag he was holding away, he walked further into the apartment, stopping at the doorway of their bedroom. "Aw," he whispered under his breath, smiling, stepping into the bedroom. He gently sat next to his sleeping girlfriend.

His knuckles traced her cheeks but he froze. Why is she so cold? His soft touch was enough to wake her up, because she stirred and blinked up at him. "Seb, hi, welcome back." Her voice was hoarse. "Y/N? Did you fall sick?" he asked worriedly as she sat up, distancing herself from him. "I'm not sick," she muttered but Sebastian wouldn't buy it.

He reached out to cup her cheek, feeling like he had been stabbed multiple times when she leaned away from his touch. "Y/N?" She shook her head and looked out of the window, bringing her knees to her chest. "Just wanna be alone right now." She didn't want to send him away. She wanted to sit in his lap, listen to him rambling about his day…

But she also didn't want to be near him. Do I even deserve him? "What happened?" he insisted, his eyes going wide when she glared at him. "Go. Away." He scrambled off the bed without another word, softly closing the door behind him as he walked into the sitting room, running a hand through his hair. He sat down on the couch and looked around.

What happened in those 6 hours that he was away? Sebastian knew she wasn't on her cycle, it still had another week to come. So it wasn't mood swings. His eyes landed on the empty bowl of Mac and Cheese sitting on the dining table but they skimmed right past it, not knowing that that bowl was the reason for Y/N's sadness. Then he stared at the designer handbag on the opposite couch.

Picking up the bag, he strode back to their room, knocking on the door. Maybe seeing a pretty purse would lighten her mood? "What?" Y/N called out from inside and he opened the door, holding the purse up. "I brought you a gift." Y/N's heart started thudding in her chest and tears glistened in her eyes anew as she stared at the bag with utmost resentment.

"I don't want it."

Sebastian went rigid. She never rejects my gifts. "Y/N—" She started shaking her head. "No. Return it. I'm not taking it. I don't want it," she repeated, her glare now directed at him. "But doll…" he tried, freezing when her jaw clenched. "Get out." Disheartened, he walked out once more, more confused than anything. Now I have to know what happened.

Inside the room, Y/N sobbed silently. The bag was so pretty, her favorite color, the sleek design… she wanted to keep it so bad, but she knew she wasn't worthy of it. Sebastian brought her gifts all the time. Most of them expensive as shit; he had the money to blow off. What had she done for him? Nothing, really. He spoiled her heartily, never once allowing her to do the same.

"You're mine, baby girl, mine to love, mine to cherish, mine to spoil."

She was definitely leeching off him. Outside the room, Sebastian took out his phone and texted Y/F/N, who was Y/N's closest friend. They rarely spoke, but Y/N told Y/F/N everything and he knew she'd have answers.

hey, do you know what's up with y/n

why what happened

she's in a really bad mood

she's angry at me and I brought her a gift but she won't take it

she usually loves them but today…

OH WAIT

I know what happened

she texted me in the afternoon

something about a comment on Instagram or something

ig that's why she's in a bad mood

thanks

I'll check it out

He ended the conversation and opened Instagram, seeing a new post from his dear girlfriend. Sebastian couldn't help but smile as he liked the photo, commenting a heart emoji. There were only around 22 comments on the post, so he decided to go through them. Which comment had triggered her? He found it instantly and his nostrils flared.

Replying to the fairly rude comment, he typed, how about you fuck off and mind your own damn business? If you don't like her, unfollow and leave. There's literally nothing else you need to do. After hitting send, he kept his phone away and, determination shining in his eyes, ran back to the bedroom.

He threw open the door and a sob escaped the lips of the startled woman. He started taking off the annoying clothes he was wearing until he was just in his boxers, sliding into the bed next to her. She attempted to push him away but the strong man didn't budge, holding her on his lap as she thrashed. Soon, she gave up the fight and melted against him, crying her eyes out.

"I'm sorry," she apologized again and again, her breath hitching. "Hush, baby, it's okay, I'm not mad," he whispered, rubbing her back, helping her calm down. She rested her head on his shoulder, her arms tight around him. "Tell me the truth. What happened?" he asked even though he knew the answer. Tiredly, Y/N narrated everything; from the comment to all her insecurities.

Sebastian gently cupped her cheeks, wiping her tears off. "Y/N, you're mine. I love taking care of you, I love spoiling you, and I don't do it because I expect something in return, I do it because I love you. Don't listen to strangers on the internet, what better work do they have? Nothing but lowlifes. You don't have to do anything for me. I don't want you to do anything for me."

"But Seb…"

"No. No, you're my girlfriend and only the best for my girl. I love all the gifts you get me. I cherish them wholeheartedly. Just you being my girl is a gift better than anything else in the world, to be honest. But I'm going to continue looking after you whether you like it or not. You don't even have to go to work, I'm here for you. I love you." Y/N teared up again.

They were happy tears.

"I love you so much," she cried weakly and Sebastian pulled her to him, cradling her head, breathing her in. "I love you too, doll. Now will you take my gift, please?" She nodded against him and he gently lowered her on the bed, going outside to get the bag. Once back in their room he handed the bag to her, smiling at the way her eager hands reached up to accept the gift.

As he watched her admiring the bag, he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, till death do them part.

His girl, his lovely girl.

---

A/N: Leave a like if you enjoyed, thanks for reading!

#sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan x female reader #sebastian stan characters #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier #disney #mcu #marvel #avengers #fanfic #writing #writeblr

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shreddedparchment · 3 years

Text

A Wife for Thor Pt.22

Obstacle

04/08/2021

Pairing: King!Thor x Reader Word Count: 5,413

Warnings: angst, jealousy, marital problems, pregnancy, allusions to cheating (no actual infidelity), fluff, smug Loki

A/N: It took me SO long to get this chapter down. I wrote literally like a few sentence a day for a bit and then finally got some good chunks out. This has been a tough week but this chapter makes it all worth it! I hope y’all think so too. A lot of good stuff happens in this chapter, as in stuff that I really like. If you happen to reblog, thanks so much for helping me spread my work!

Please DO NOT repost my stories on any other sites or blogs.

REBLOGS are always welcome!

The shuffle around the palace as Loki escorts you through the front gate is overwhelming.

It’s safe to say that judging by your reception when you’d shown up in Heimdall’s tower located on the far side of the city, the Asgardians are happy to see you.

Armod is also happy to see you and you rush to get into your car before you can get swarmed by eager Asgardians.

Loki joins you in the back seat and lets Armod gush over his happiness at seeing you back home and healthy. And pregnant! More than anything, the people are happy to see the swell of your belly.

Many of the women are crying as you step out of the car at the palace gate, the men cheering enthusiastically.

Some of the children have found flower petals to throw into the air and it rains white, pink, and yellow blossoms.

It's the small waving hand of a little girl with ebony floor length braids that tugs too hard on your heartstrings and you give in to your impulse.

“Armod, stop the car, I’d like to greet the people,” you ask, swayed further by the eager faces of the young girl's siblings who flank her..

As much as being Queen had come unexpectedly and as much work as it's been, loving the Asgardians has never been a challenge and you've missed your people.

Their kindness has always been the best part of your day.

Armod gives Loki a quick look but stops the car just as the palace gates are opening.

He pulls over to the side, putting it in park before hurrying out to open the door for you.

“Are you sure?” Loki checks, reaching over to place his hand over yours on the seat.

“Of course. I owe them this. I’ve been gone for so long.”

“If you’d rather go in, we can find an excuse.”

��Loki,” you laugh once. “Is something wrong? Is there a reason I shouldn’t get out of the car?”

“Not at all,” he assures you. “I just don’t want you to force yourself. I know this pregnancy hasn’t exactly been easy on you.”

“I’m okay. And I’m sure they wanna see the proof that they have an heir coming. Really, Loki, I don't mind.”

Loki sighs, but gets out quickly to move around and take Armod’s place and offer you his arm.

Taking it, you pull yourself out, and after a long moment to steady yourself on your feet, you turn to face your people.

A large number of Valkyries suddenly pour from the open palace gateway and you wait as they line themselves in front of the gathering crowd. A simple border of control to keep you safe.

The people don’t seem threatened by the guard either and they continue to cheer until you raise your hand and call them to silence.

It only takes a few seconds for the noise to die, leaving only the ambient sounds of the city, wind, and the shuffling feet as more Asgardians and visiting humans gather.

“Hello,” you begin, voice a little shaky from nerves. “I’m...I-I’d like to start by first apologizing for disappearing. And then for being gone so long.”

The people watch and listen attentively, hanging on your every word. As your hands drop down to your belly to stroke it anxiously out of habit, their eyes are drawn to it and they seem to rattle with excitement again.

Looking down at your tummy, you contemplate the little one inside and the kicks he gave you earlier in the day.

He's really in there.

“It’s been a long journey to do what’s been expected of me. Difficult, actually. Giving you and Thor what we’ve all been hoping for is a privilege though. It's important that you all know that.

"However, I'm not as strong as all of you. I'm not as resilient. As soon as I knew that I was expecting the future prince or princess of New Asgard, I knew that I had to take precautions. I had to stop thinking like your Queen and just for a while, think like a mom. I told Thor that I wanted to take some time away from my duties as Queen if only to make sure that my pregnancy would take. In order to ensure the health of this baby.

“Im so very sorry if I caused any of you any worry or pain by disappearing. That was never my intention and it makes me...I can only say that I'm sorry. I hope that you all can understand why I left. The The thing is I’m happy to say that my efforts weren't wasted, clearly."

There's a rumble of gentle laughter that flows through the crowd and breaks the slightly somber mood your speech is causing. You give them a smile and they smile back.

"And while that does make me very happy, it has not been easy to carry this baby. I have been sick and weak but after some rest I'm now feeling stronger than ever. With the constant and careful care provided by Doctors Wilson and Alric, I’m finally able to resume my duties as Queen with the knowledge that this baby is strong and healthy and my body can take the strain of bringing him-or her into this world.

“I’m so happy to be back among my people, my home. You all are my family and it fills me with such joy to know that I have made you all proud.”

The people cheer, more and more gathering along the street so that it’s now clogged and impassable. Others have taken to peeking out of windows from the surrounding buildings or finding balconies and roofs to stand on to get a better look at you.

Their excitement changes to trepidation at the look on your face as you realize that now is the perfect time to address what happened yesterday.

They’re so attuned to your mood that they quiet down again and wait nervously for you to speak.

"On a more serious note, I know that many of you must have been shocked by the lies spewed onto the pages of the Watch. And I'd like to be as clear as I possibly can about my absence from the palace.

"I only left because of the concern I had for our future prince or princess. There was absolutely no other reason for my absence in our great city. While it is true that something did happen between Thor, Jane, and myself--well, I will only say that now I know that His Majesty the King of Asgard is wholly devoted to me and our family, just as he has been from the moment he accepted me as his wife.

"Not that I ever doubted it," you lie. No one needs to know how bad things are and it is true that now you know Thor is devoted to you.

So, it's not completely a lie.

"As a people," you continue. "We'll need to be vigilant about the people we choose to trust to come into our homes. We will be more cautious now, and as a woman…"

You swallow hard, thinking about the words itching on the tip of your tongue to tumble forward and make your heart clear. Maybe it's not right to say it? Maybe it isn't the queenly thing to do?

You don't care.

"As a wife and a soon-to-be mother, I will say that Doctor Jane Foster is not welcome in my home. She has proven to be unworthy of the trust we placed in her and while her expertise is an invaluable commodity that I am sad to lose, I would rather have the second best than risk the stability of my family."

To your surprise, there are a flutter of approving nods and smiles, wives and husband's looking scandalized by the confirmation that something went down but clearly it was Thor that had Jane kicked out. A few cheers come but they quiet down quickly.

"My love for His Majesty is unwavering. As is his for me. No marriage can be without it's struggles but Thor and I are as united as we have ever been. Both in love, devotion, to each other and you, our people. Together we will strive to protect this kingdom to the best of our abilities and with this child, I hope we can begin to lay down proper roots for us so that everyone on Earth will know that New Asgard is here to stay."

The crowd cheers. It's deafening and your hands are trembling so terribly even clenched into fists they shake.

"LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!" someone shouts and the others fall into the chant as it's picked up by what sounds like everyone in the crowd.

A cool hand presses against the center of your back and you lean towards him as he whispers in your ear.

"That was beautifully done, Y/N," Loki admires. "Now come along. You need your rest."

You cradle your bump and the crowd cheers louder as you wave while Loki leads you back into the car.

As it pulls away from the curb, the Valkyrie turn to follow behind you. Faces full of stern pride. Their gleaming armor shining bright in the late afternoon sun.

The large wooden and steel reinforced gates of the palace close with a thundering clatter and you lean back, heart suddenly clenching painfully. Your stomach turns and you feel like you might throw up.

You shut your eyes and open the window allowing the cooling air to help drive your nausea away.

"Y/N? You alright?" Loki checks, putting his hand on your arm.

"I'm fine," you assure him, unwilling to open your eyes.

"Are you sure? Only, you're looking a little green."

That doesn't actually happen does it? Do people look green when they're gonna throw up?

You assume he's exaggerating, but as the last bit of the swirl in your belly passes, you look at him with fearful eyes.

"I'm nervous," you admit.

"To see Thor?"

"Mm," you nod.

"He's missed you. He will probably try and hug you. Might even kiss you."

"I don't know if I can handle that, Loki."

"You'll have to. The guards around the palace are sworn to secrecy about anything that happens in here, but with the amount of information that magazine was able to get we're pretty sure there's a mole amongst our number."

You look away from him, frowning because the last thing you want is to hug and kiss Thor.

Well, that is, you really want to do those things. Which is why you shouldn't. Not until you can be around him with some kind of rational thought and control over your feelings.

You need to get a grip and come to terms with the reality of your situation before you can let yourself love hum.

You have to protect yourself.

It turns out that you have nothing to worry about.

Estrid who had come before you with your things is there to greet you. A few others of the palace staff come to see you and you're welcome back with fondness.

Because you know you have to play the part, you look for him.

"His Majesty had a sudden summons from the Lady Sif and the Warriors Three, my Queen. He apologizes for missing your arrival but he's had the small dining room filled with all of your favorites.

"When you are finished with dinner, he has asked that you wait for him in his study."

Estrid's tone tells you she's wary for you. She wants to make sure you're okay.

The disappointment you feel gives you away not only to yourself, but everyone there to see your face fall as you caress your belly.

"A blessing in disguise?" Loki suggests in your ear for just you, but the smile on his lips says he knows better.

"He'll be back before it gets too late, Your Majesty," Estrid assures you, trying to soothe your sadness. "He promised. There’s nothing more he wants than to see you."

"I know," you smile at her, then the others before you head for the dining room, your stomach grumbling in anticipation of the foods you know are waiting.

~~~~~~~~~~

Waiting is torture. You keep trying to read your book but your attention is pulled back to the door of Thor’s study every few seconds.

You groan, dropping the book onto the desk before throwing your head back with scrunched up eyes.

How is it possible to be desperate to see someone while also dreading it?

It feels like you'll die if you don't lay eyes on Thor but also like it'll tear you to shreds if you do. There's no winning here.

You gasp as the door opens and get to your feet in the same breath.

Thor's body is rising and falling heavily with his own labored breathing. He'd been running.

To get to you? No. You can't be swayed.

"I'm here."

His declaration is soft but heavy with meaning. More than just him announcing his arrival.

"Oh, aren't you a vision," he gushes.

"Hi," you whisper, only because you can't catch your breath.

He's wearing jeans, a plain black t-shirt stretched across his bulging chest. He's even more massive than you remember. Three months away has deprived you so fully that suddenly being in his presence leaves you hungry for him.

You want him so much.

"I've missed you, desperately," he confesses. "May I greet you properly?"

You frown, so undecided.

"Or not," Thor relents. "Forgive me, I just got caught up in the moment."

Why is this so hard?

You want to feel him.

"You can greet our baby properly," you give in.

A big part of you needs to feel him and this is the only way you can give in and feel like you're still doing your best to hold strong in your resolve to get some distance.

Thor’s eye lights up and quickly finds the swell of your tummy with recognition.

"Really?"

"I will never keep you from our baby, Thor. Even if I'm not ready for things to go back to normal between us just yet."

Thor takes a half step towards you and watches you carefully for any indication that you're not comfortable with his proximity.

You sigh, head tilted to the left slightly before you hold out your hand to him, beckoning him closer.

In three long strides Thor takes your hand and stops when he's only a foot away.

"Here," you gasp.

Your heart is in overdrive. Thor’s touch is doing things to your body. There's an initial rush of butterflies in your stomach and quickly you pull Thor’s hands to the spots where your baby is kicking in response.

Thor’s body freezes. He goes rigid. He even stops breathing.

For a moment you begin to worry that maybe you've broken him, until he suddenly drops to his knees.

He swallows hard, eyes pooling as he stares at the swell of your stomach as the baby continues to kick.

“They’re really in there,” he’s so choked up about it that his voice cracks around the words.

As he speaks, the baby kicks more.

Thor laughs but then leans in to kiss your stomach over the fabric of your dress.

“We really made her,” Thor gushes.

“Her?”

He looks up at you, confused for a second before he smiles wide, “Or him. It doesn’t matter. What matters is our baby is coming.”

Your heart swells, and you’re so happy that you could float away like a hot air balloon with the warmth flooding your limbs.

This is the moment you’d dreamt of. This is the moment that had been stolen from you by Jane and her lies. This is the moment that you and Thor had both been yearning for.

He’s so caught up in it, floating through the glow of this perfect moment that he presses his lips to your tummy again two more times before he’s rising, his hand hooked behind your neck as he meets your lips as he gets to his feet.

You’re so unprepared for it, so utterly lost in this sweet exchange between him and your baby that your lips pucker on their own.

He opens his eye and yours, already open, stare into his. He looks slightly shocked to find himself kissing you but he doesn’t stop.

Instead, his expression shifts into a pained look of desire. He pulls back, his hand dropping to grip your bicep.

“I would say that I’m sorry but I have been wanting to kiss you since the moment I left you three months ago.”

You say nothing, watching him, listening. You’re searching your soul to see if this is okay with you because it feels okay. Despite the sirens blaring in your mind about the restrictions you’d set for yourself when you’d decided to come back home, your body is telling you it needs this. Your heart is painfully aching at Thor��s touch.

You’ve missed it. You’ve missed him.

“Is this alright? I can go.”

The idea of him going now feels like the end of the world. Rationally, you know that isn’t an appropriate response to his offering to leave you be, especially when you know you asked him for space for specific reasons.

“No,” your hands grip the sides of his t-shirt tightly, holding him in place without any actual strength since compared to him, you’re as mighty as a little mouse.

You refuse to look up at him, despite the crumbling of your resolve.

“No, don’t go.”

It’s an almost involuntary shy response to your diminishing shame at losing all control after his touch. After one kiss. You should be disappointed in yourself. And part of you is. However, that part of you grows increasingly small as Thor gently takes hold of your chin and guides your gaze up until you can meet his.

“I’m sorry, cherub. I will try and be worthy of you again.”

“I know,” you admit, knowing how sorry he’s been from the moment he realized that he’d done something that hurt you badly. “I know you are.”

“Can I kiss you, cherub?”

His voice is so deep, so alluring and coaxing that you drop your gaze again, fixing it on his collarbone before slowly you nod.

His arm winds its way around your waist and he pulls you to him before dipping down and catching your lips with his again.

He pulls away after a second because the swell of your belly gets in the way, but he laughs and looks down at it.

The pleasant sound of his happiness gives you too much joy.

As you begin to smile, Thor reaches down to press one hand to the side of your stomach while he pulls you against him again and kisses you this time with more fervor.

The longer he has his lips pressed to yours, the more enthusiastic he gets until finally you’re breathless and you pull back but instead of pulling away, you wrap your arms around him and fist the back of his t-shirt,

You bury your face against his wide chest and Thor brings his hands back up to caress the sides of your face, his lips kissing the top of your head.

“I know I may not have a right to say this, but thank you for coming home. Thank you for coming back to me. I thought I’d lost you."

His arms grow a little tighter, his heart is in an absolute stampede.

You turn your head sideways so that you can listen to his heartbeat.

"This is what I'd wanted," you whimper, starting to be overcome with the emotion of being reunited with Thor and things falling into place more easily. "This is how I'd wanted us to share this moment."

Thor sighs heavily, giving you one more squeeze before he pushes you back a little so that he can look at you.

“I’m so sorry that I robbed you of that. I was a fool,” he nods, his eye intense as he stares into yours with wordless declarations piercing into you.

The memory of your speech with the people when you arrived pops into your head and now with Thor’s arms around you it all feels a little like an overreaction. The past three months feels like a distant nightmare.

Or does this feel like a dream?

“Thor,” you begin but Thor’s lips are on you again, drowning out your words.

“Oh, to hear you say my name,” he declares and kisses you again.

Your mouth opens for him and you absolutely melt against his chest as he nearly dips you in passion.

He pulls back again, “Is this real?”

He kisses you.

“You feel so good in my arms.”

He kisses you.

“Your skin is so…” but then he hums and kisses you.

He dips down and with his arms tight around your waist but also careful with the swell of your stomach, he lifts you so that you’re level with his eye.

“I love you, so much, my cherub. Thank you, thank you for coming home. Thank you.”

“I’m sorry I stayed away,” you sigh. “I need to be strong without you, Thor. I was hurt but I never stopped loving you.”

His face goes through shame, understanding, and then elation.

In a burst of subdued anger and aggression for what he put you through, you reach up and grab his shoulder. You dig your fingers in against the taut muscle then reach up to pull one of his ears.

You’re clearly not hurting him but he allows you to move his head, understanding the need to express your anger even if you’re not doing any damage.

“Never do that to me again,” you growl. “Never say that you’ll leave me. Why would you say that? Even in passing? You were so damn sure.”

“No, Y/N, I wasn’t. The moment I saw you, I knew that I could never leave you. I’m sorry. I could never even think those thoughts again.”

“You better not, or I won’t come back next time. I’ll disappear and you’ll never see me again.”

Thor takes your threat for what it is. A promise. Truth.

He shakes his head as he leans forward to press his forehead to yours, shutting his eye.

“I swear,” he begins. “On my life.”

He keeps you there, hovering over the ground with your heads together for a few minutes before he slowly lowers you to the ground. You realize it’s because he wants to stroke your belly and you take a slight step back so that he can.

He smiles, happy. It reminds you of the look your people had when you’d arrived only a hundred times as possessive and joyful.

Again, your speech intrudes on your reunion and this time, you won’t let him distract you.

“Thor,” you coax, placing your hands over his where they rest on the sides of your stomach.

“Yes, my cherub?”

He’s excessive in the affection he puts in his voice but you know that he must be floating on cloud nine after what you both went through when you made him leave you at your house.

“I-I did something and I’m not sure if it was right of me to do it,” you watch his brow wrinkle and for a split second you almost lose yourself in the beauty of his face.

Has he always been this handsome?

“When I got back I kinda made a speech? Everyone was so happy to see me and to see me carrying our heir and I wanted to apologize to them for leaving and for making them worry. I wanted to share in their excitement for the baby and with that stupid tabloid having come out yesterday-”

“Right, the article,” there’s guilt in his voice despite there being no truth to the rumors it printed.

“I wanted to put their minds at ease and I...I did confirm that something happened with Jane but not what they were thinking.”

Thor’s expression hardens just a tad and he pulls backs towards a large armchair. He grabs your hand though and pulls you along with him until he can sit and then carefully attempts to offer you his lap, unsure if you’ll sit.

You do, because you’re tired and because you’re not eager to be away from him again. Now that you’re touching him, you’re not in a hurry to change that again.

“What did you say exactly?”

Swallowing hard, you lick your lips nervously, “Um...I told them the truth. Not exactly the truth, but enough of it that they’ll understand that Jane isn’t welcome here. I said that the only reason I left is for my health and the health of the baby, which is true. I didn’t want them to worry about us because even if we didn’t reconcile, I want us to be united for them at least.

“But I don’t trust Jane, Thor. Not after what she did. Not after how she treated me when you weren’t looking, and the people need to know that I will protect them from anyone, no matter who they are to you or me.”

Thor’s face grows pained as you speak, his arm wrapping around your waist as his other hand caresses the side of your stomach. You’re starting to realize that it’s going to be hard to get his hands off it, but that doesn’t seem like a terrible problem.

“I wish you had told me that she’d been rude to you,” Thor sighs, taking his hand off of his stomach to stroke your cheek. “If I had known-”

“She wasn’t rude to me Thor, she dismissed me. I wasn’t even worth acknowledging to her and now I know it’s because she was jealous and wanted you back because what? She saw what we had together and suddenly it was good enough for her?

“I was in her way. That’s all I was. Even if in the end she couldn’t go through with it whether it was because she felt guilty for doing this to us or for lying or for having second thoughts and knowing that she doesn’t want to be Queen or a mom, she’s a bad person to me. And I have every right to protect myself, my baby, and our marriage from her. She’s not welcome here Thor. I never want to see her again. Ever.”

He’s cradling you now, holding you close because the intensity with which you're telling him that Jane is not welcome in your home is transferring to him.

“And if you’d known, you wouldn’t have done anything, Thor. You’d probably have talked to her and asked her what was going on and she would have lied to you and you would have believed her.”

He doesn’t deny it. He does look like it hurts him to know that you know though. That’s enough for you.

“I think it took her lying and doing this to us to make you see what she’s capable of.”

Thor shuts his eye, resting his head against your chest as he wraps his arms around you again.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know you are, Thor. But you weren’t the one who lied. I mean, you didn’t tell me what was happening, but you weren’t the reason that this happened. If Jane hadn’t lied-”

“But she did,” Thor says, his deep voice anguished. “And I failed to honor my vows. You are my Queen and I should have come to you the moment she told me she was pregnant.”

You both fall into silence as you reach over to stroke his bicep. His skin is so soft. Touching it gives you comfort in a way you weren’t aware you needed. The more you touch it the more you need to feel it.

A finger stroking his skin turns into two, then four, then your entire hand is running up under the sleeve of his t-shirt.

With the way his hand curls around your thigh, you know that both your bodies are responding to your touch. Both of you are heated but instead of giving into that because you aren’t ready for that yet, you lay your head on his shoulder and curl in closer to his chest.

Thor sighs heavily, wrapping you up in his arms as he cradles you close.

“Now we know better,” you whisper.

“Now I know what losing you will do to me,” Thor agrees. “I’ve missed you so much, cherub.”

You don’t respond. You’re too choked up to say anything without your voice cracking so both of you stay like that for a while.

The cocoon of Thor’s arms is toasty and from the exhaustion you’re feeling plus all of the emotions that have drained you, your eyes are heavy and difficult to keep open.

“What about you?”

Thor’s chest rumbles with a chuckle.

“We can talk more tomorrow, cherub. Sleep.”

“I’m not sleepy,” you lie.

“Very well, then. What about me?”

“You’re sleepy?” you look up at him, full of concern.

He chuckles again, “No, cherub. What were you asking?”

“Oh! I just wanted to know if you’re okay. What Jane did to you can’t have been easy. Despite what she did to us as a couple, she said she was pregnant. You’ve been wanting a baby for so long and she dangled that in front of you like the rat that she is. And then she wasn’t even pregnant?”

Thor’s arms constrict around you as he pulls you up towards him to kiss you.

It’s slow and full of emotion.

“Even after all of that, you’re still worried about me?”

“It took time,” you admit. “Once I wasn’t so angry and I thought about what Jane really did. I hate the idea that your heart broke over her lies. I can’t believe she ever loved you if she was willing to make you feel that way.”

Thor just stares at you, searching your eyes before he rubs his nose gently against your own. When he speaks, his voice is so low, so deep, an intimate whisper. It burrows into your chest and settles right there underneath your ribs and makes you breathless with missing him and desire.

“That’s why you’re my Queen, Y/N. And she is not.”

You’re not sure if it’s an Asgardian ability or if maybe it’s something specific to Thor, but he has a way of making you swoon.

“I missed you so much,” he confesses again, that whisper sinful. “Did you not miss me?”

You nod because you can’t speak. There’s a lump in your throat made of both sadness and want.

“Was your bed as frigid as mine was in your absence? Did you miss my breath on your neck as I did yours? Or the steady beat of your heart when you pressed your breast to my back as you held me while I slept?”

Fuck, he’s making this so impossible.

“I hate you so much,” you counter, but his lips stretch into a small knowing smile as you take a tight hold of the neck of his shirt and pull him up to meet your lips.

He exhales heavily into you, tasting you, relishing in every pulsating touch as both your hearts ache and yearn almost in disbelief as if both of you can’t believe that these wants, these needs are finally being met.

As he pulls back to tilt his head the other way, he takes hold of the sides of your face again, his lips grazing yours, “I love you.”

Before you can reply or yank him back into that torturous yet blissful kiss, a voice at the doorway clears their throat.

“Well, that was fast, what happened to keeping him at a distance?”

Loki’s voice pulls your gaze and you can feel your cheeks and neck burn at how easily it seems you’ve crumbled when finally face to face with Thor.

You frown at your brother-in-law, while Thor ignores his brother and leans up to press very non-chaste kisses to your neck, “I told you coming back was a bad idea.”

But Loki’s smile is blinding and with one chuckle he backs out of the room, shutting the door quietly as Thor turns you back to him so that he can get back to kissing you.

#king!thor x reader #thor x reader #arranged marriage au #royal au #a wife for thor #king!thor x reader fanfiction #king!thor x reader fanfic #king!thor x reader fic #king!thor x you #thor x reader fanfiction #thor x reader fanfic #thor x reader fic #thor x you #marvel fanfiction #marvel au #a wife for thor pt22

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liesoverthec · 3 years

Photo

9-1-1 on FOX Relationship Analysis, season 1 graphics.

- all relationship analysis graphics -

Do not repost my graphics.

More graphics and a discussion/explanation of the data under the cut.

Hi y’all, welcome to the relationship analysis!

The relationship analysis data is a recording of every interaction on the show, who all is in involved in the interaction, and how often that specific combination of people interacted throughout the season. Most of the time, we have more than two characters on screen, so most interactions are between multiple people at once. An important thing to note is that even if the characters aren’t directly and actively contributing to the conversation (eg listening and contributing every once in a while but not doing the bulk of the emotional work), they still get an interaction counted b/c people are ALWAYS building relationships w/ one another, whether or not other people are around. And especially on a show like this, where people are constantly growing and learning (and being traumatized lol), seeing that happen in each other develops their connections and their understandings of one another.

This lends to the data making the most impact when it’s divided into two parts - when two characters are alone together, and when they’re together but other characters are there as well.

Data should be read like - “Bobby and Buck had 15 interactions alone together this season, but another 44 interactions where Hen or Chim or some combination of mains were also there.”

I actually keep detailed notes about where each and every one of these interactions come from, so please feel free to ask me when characters interacted, or just more details about the data collection if you’d like.

Bobby

Alt id: A segmented bar graph showing Bobby’s total interactions in s1 with the other mains. He spent the most time both alone with Buck and overall on the show.

My man Bobbyyyyyyyyyyyyy. The most interesting thing about Bobby is that his interactions are almost ENTIRELY restricted to the 118. No one else on the entire show is QUITE that isolated. It definitely makes sense given the context of the season - Bobby is extremely closed off, and is not inviting relationships beyond the ones he formed through his team being irresistible, until the end of the season, which is actually where ALL of his alone time with Athena comes from (one interaction in ep 9 and then 3 in ep 10). It also makes sense with his and Buck’s stories this season for Bobby to interact the most with Buck - between the sex addict plot, Buck’s first at-work death, and then the development of Buck’s relationship with Abby and him asking Bobby about it.

Also interesting - while Buck had more interactions this season, Bobby had more screen time. Which means that while Buck talked to a larger combination of people, Bobby spent more time than Buck did actually interacting with those people.

Also Bobby is one of only two mains to interact with every single main one on one.

Here’s a final look at how exactly Bobby’s interactions broke down -

Alt id: A bar graph showing Bobby’s most common interaction groups for s1 - he had the most interactions with Hen, Chim and Buck as a group (20 interactions over the season).

As you can see, his top 3 most common interaction groupings all include Buck, which is why Bobby spent more time w/ him than anyone else.

Athena

Alt id: A segmented bar graph showing Athena’s total interactions in s1 with the other mains. She spent the most time both alone with Buck and overall on the show.

There are two things about Athena’s data that I think are worth pointing out. Number one: Athena has the most varied interactions out of any of the mains on the show. This means that out of everyone, she has the most connections, and her personal life is the most developed of the core 6 (duh 😂 but love when the data proves it - esp when she interacts second most w/ Michael TOTAL, which I’m not sure I would have guessed just based on casual watching.) The other thing worth pointing out is that she almost has more interactions where she’s interacting w/ complete strangers than with the other characters of the show. The nature of her being a solo lieutenant isolates her quite a lot.

She has the same thing going as Bobby in regards to screen time however - she might have the second least amount of interactions for the season, but it just means she spends, on average, more time with the people she does interact with.

Here’s a final look at how her interactions broke down -

Alt id: A bar graph showing Athena’s most common interaction groups for s1 - she spent the most time with Hen alone (12 interactions).

In addition to her being so isolated b/c of work, she spends most of her time alone with other main characters when she’s with them - 4 of her 5 most common interaction pairings are with people alone.

Hen

Alt id: A segmented bar graph showing Hen’s total interactions in s1 with the other mains. She spent the most time alone with Athena, but had the most interactions with Buck overall.

Just as with Bobby, most of Hen’s interactions are with the other members of the 118. While Athena spends the most time with Hen, period, Hen spends the most time with Buck, although she is alone with Athena more than anyone else. The interesting thing to me is that I might not have guessed that she spent so much time with Buck, just based on casual viewing, so that was a really interesting reveal in the data! She also actually has the most “home life” outside of Athena and Abby, despite the fact that only ~10% of her interactions aren’t with the other first responders.

Hen is in the opposite boat from Bobby and Athena - she’s higher up on the interaction chart than she is on the screen time chart, which indicates that she spent less time in each interaction on average than other characters did in theirs.

Here’s a final look at how her interactions broke down -

Alt id: A bar graph showing Hen’s most common interaction groups for s1 - she spent the most time with Bobby, Chim and Buck (20 interactions).

As you can see, 3 of her top four interaction groupings include Buck, which is why her relationship with him was her top one for the season!

Chim

Alt id: A segmented bar graph showing Chim’s total interactions in s1 with the other mains. He spent the most time alone with Bobby, but had the most interactions with Hen overall.

Honestly the most I can say about this is yet again that Chim was stiffed in s1. The most interesting thing however, is that through Chim you can see the shift in focus to his and Hen’s friendship as the show goes on - in that most of his interactions come from the last five episodes after he comes back from the rebar, and they start to develop Hen and Chim as a paramedic duo who are a little more independent from the station as a whole. The reason Hen didn’t have most of her interactions with him is that she still had interactions while he was gone 😂

It’s also interesting to me that we literally only see him with Tatiana twice but she creates such a huge impact on him.

Here’s a final look at how his interactions broke down -

Alt id: A bar graph showing Chim’s most common interaction groups for s1 - he spent the most time with Bobby, Hen and Buck (20 interactions).

I’ll be curious to see if Chim’s “number of interactions alone w Buck” goes up once Maddie is introduced or not!

Abby

Alt id: A segmented bar graph showing Abby’s total interactions in s1 with the other mains. She spent the most time both alone with Buck and overall.

I’m going to be really honest with y’all - most of the reason I’m interested in Abby’s data is to see how it compares to Maddie’s. 😂 Abby is an interesting contradiction bc she is at once, got some very developed relationships, but she’s also incredibly isolated. For one, she spends more time talking to strangers than she does to any one main character, which is not true for ANY other main, even Athena who also has a solo job. But then at the same time, she has the second most developed “outside of work” life out of any of the mains.

The most interesting thing here though is that her relationship with Buck is the single most common interaction for the entire season. I know we all know this, but it’s crazy to think about when the second most common interaction is the 118 together, and their number of interactions is that high bc they WORK together, so it’s a mix of professional and personal interactions, whereas Buck and Abby’s relationship is purely personal.

Second most interesting thing would definitely be that even though she spends time with Buck both alone and with others around, she still spends more time talking to total strangers than him.

Here’s a final look at how her interactions broke down -

Alt id: A bar graph showing Abby’s most common interaction groups for s1 - she had the most interactions alone with Buck (22 interactions).

As you can see here, they just. Put so much more work into her relationship w/ Buck even than her relationship with her mom. Most likely bc both Abby and her mom were moving on at the end of ep 10 but it’s still interesting!

Buck

Alt id: A segmented bar graph showing Buck’s total interactions in s1 with the other mains. He spent the most time with Abby alone, but had the most interactions with Bobby overall.

Last but not least! The stark difference between the time he spends with Hen/Bobby and everyone else is so interesting to me, and it’s mostly b/c eps 4 and 5 (while Chim is gone) focus VERY heavily on Bobby, which drags Hen and Buck into more interactions since he’s so isolated from the world and they’re really his only connections.

Bobby and Buck are actually the only relationship where they both have the most interactions with each other (although Buck spends more time alone w/ Abby than he does with Bobby, whereas Bobby is still alone with Buck most). It’s a little hilarious to me though, that they work so hard on the Buck&Abby relationship and then Bobby still ends up being more present in his life, and it feels very indicative of where the series goes next.

Buck is in the same boat as Hen - he has the most interactions out of anyone, but not the most screen time, which means that he’s spending less time interacting with the other characters on average.

Here’s a final look at how his interactions broke down -

Alt id: A bar graph showing Buck’s most common interaction groups for s1 - he had the most interactions with Abby alone (22 interactions).

This breakdown shows a little better why Bobby beat out Abby for relationship development this season with Buck - top interactions 2-4 all include Bobby, which adds up over the season.

----

Well, that’s all folks! (If you made it this far, I’m both very impressed and very thankful - I hope it was worth it!)

Please let me know if you have any questions about this, or really anything about the show in general! (Seriously I mean that 😄)

Lots of love, and I’m marginally started on s2 of this, although doing screen time for s5 will probably slow it down, so keep an eye out but not TOO closely! 😂)

🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝

#911 fox #911 relationship analysis graphics #9-1-1 #911 on fox #bobby nash #bobbynashedit #athena grant #athenagrantedit #hen wilson #henwilsonedit #chimney han #chimneyhanedit #abby clark #evan buckley #evanbucklyedit #daily911 #911verse

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