#oH WORM 👀👀 !?

[odo-apologist]

After finding out Terry Farrell was in it (!!!), I decided to bite the bullet and watch the (2nd) pilot of the U.S. version of Red Dwarf and oof. Yeah. That wasn't great. Lister getting miscast was not a joke, I don't know how they messed him up so badly. However, The Cat might've disappointed me most because of the potential there. Like, Terry Farrell could have Killed It if she was able to portray Cat similarly to Danny John-Jules. One of the best aspects of Jadzia is that Terry Farrell manages to give her such an interesting fluidity in her presentation of her gender and her identity, and that's in part because she plays Dax with such charisma and swagger, the kind of traits I think would work wonders if she got to play a cool, vain, stylish, far-from-courageous ("They're playing our song: the awooga waltz," his cries in the cell during Meltdown, RIMMER calling him a coward) Felis Sapien. Instead, though, we get this whole Brave Warrior Woman "you humans"-ing the other characters, which does not vibe with what The Cat is (okay, The Cat does do some "you humans"-ing too, but I guess it just feels less blatant-probably because it isn't the only bit in the scene when it happens). She doesn't have the charm, she doesn't have the coolness! I don't know, maybe they didn't want to have her look like a stereotype, what with the concern for clothes and appearance that would've come with sticking to the original personality of the character? But honestly, I'd take her lounging around and strutting about in brightly-colored pantsuits, ready to evacuate with her deck-sized wardrobe, over the character they planned for her to be

I'll end this little ramble by saying that while I don't think we're in the Good timeline, we definitely aren't in the worst because we could be living in the the one where Jane Leeves didn't play Dapne Moon and Terry Farrell wasn't Jadzia Dax because they were too tied up in Red Dwarf USA. In that timeline I think Y2K ended up actually happening

[imsorryimlate]

honestly seeing just how much money jack spends on his phonograph recordings has convinced me even more that it’s an aid for him. not to say that it can’t also be a nerd thing, i know enough people who nerd out over their aids. but wanting can much easier be justified by also needing. last year i splurged on an expensive pen that i really wanted and i justified it by how it would be easier on my wrist – and it is! dual purpose of being cool as hell and helping me. and that’s what i think the phonograph is to jack.

[wrestlezaynia]

Sami has been subjected to so much pain inflicted by Kevin's hands and has the scars to prove it. He's resilient and can handle anything Kevin throws at him, the same can be said for in the bedroom.

[blujayonthewing]

we reenacted this

he rolled another one

[a-story-teller]

Had another dream story idea and it's BAD out here y'all. My subconscious said "you don't go for sad old white men yaoi? Well here's one and you have to care about it so much. Good luck"

[maplesyrupsainz]

˖⁺｡˚⋆˙sickly sweet | OB38/87/whatever˖⁺｡˚⋆˙

pairing: ollie bearman x driver!reader y/n (she/her)

genre: social media au, new relationship

warnings: very fluffy lol

summary: in which you & your new boyfriend act too sweet online and your friends are extremely overprotective !!!

a/n: ollie is deffo a new one for me lol im not rly a massive fan of writing driver!reader ngl but i did it for u anon pls appreciate <333

request!!!: driver!reader x Ollie bearman just them being sickly in love with one another and the other f1 drivers being protective about y/n

fc: various brunette girls from pinterest

my masterlist

instagram ->

f1updates

liked by user16, user1, user33 and others

f1updates mclaren rookie driver y/n y/l/n seen at a sports game this weekend with f2 driver ollie bearman ♥️

tagged: yourusername, olliebearman

view all comments

user1 are they dating??

user2 yea but it's pretty new i think

user3 omg so cute

user4 awww the way she's looking at him 🥹🥹

user5 TOO CUTEEE

user6 who is he??

user7 f2 driver lol and reserve driver for ferrari & haas

user8 idk who im more jealous of

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername

liked by olliebearman, alex_albon, and others

yourusername anyways

view all comments

user9 OMGGG HELLOOO OLLIE

mclaren that better be papaya 👀

yourusername cheating on u with a mango 😕

mclaren 😵

user10 LOL? they are so unserious

landonorris cancel your weekend plans

yourusername excuse u

charles_leclerc we're staging an intervention

yourusername i wont be attending, sorry

maxverstappen1 oh dont worry y/n, we'll come to you 😊

yourusername guys please you cant "stage an intervention" just bc i have a bf now

carlossainz55 sure

user11 HAHAHA FREE HER

user12 ijbol they r so overprotective

alex_albon grid princess

liked by yourusername

olliebearman ♥️🫶

liked by yourusername

georgerussell63 read the room

landonorris 🤨

yourusername ignore them ollie

user13 LOLLLLL

olliebearman posted a story

liked by yourusername, lilymhe, and others

lilymhe cuties

liked by olliebearman

user14 omg im obsessed with u guys

user15 papaya prin 🥹🥹🥹

landonorris delete

carlossainz55 blocked and reported

maxverstappen1 watch your footing

alex_albon stay safe out there

olliebearman 😬😬😬

yourbff posted a story

liked by olliebearman, alex_albon, and others

georgerussell63 not you too

yourbff awwww stop being a loser

charles_leclerc interesting

yourbff UR NOT HER FATHER 😂

user16 OMG GOALS

user17 they r sosososo cute tgthr

user18 i jus know the rest of the grid r spamming ur dm rn

liked by yourbff

lilymhe the boys are so triggered and she dgaf

yourbff they are such little worms! free my baby y/n

f1updates

liked by user18, olliebearman, and others

f1updates mclaren rookie driver y/n y/l/n spotted once again with f2 driver ollie bearman in romantic embrace, out for lunch at a fast food chain with friends during a week long break in the season !

tagged: yourusername, olliebearman

view all comments

user19 my ollieyn heart

user20 ollie liking this omg he's down bad 😭

user21 obsessed with y/n finally noticing ollie when he drove for ferrari this season instead of when they were both in f2

user22 she's real for this

user23 no one can say tht girl isn't all about the racing

user24 lovethemlovethemlovethem

user25 im down bad crying at the gym😭

user26 would kill to see the grid group chat after this dropped 💀

user27 😂 they are so protective of the papaya princess

user28 as they should be tbh

maxverstappen1 not again...

f1updates MAX??!!

user29 what is max doing here 😂

olliebearman oh no.....

user30 screaming

messages ->

instagram ->

yourusername 📍 monte-carlo

liked by olliebearman, charles_leclerc, and others

yourusername my first podium in f1 in freaking monaco 🥺 i wanna thank my family and friends, my team and my fellow drivers who made an impossible transition from idols to friends thank u so so much i can't believe this is my life 🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

view all comments

olliebearman so proud 🧡

maxverstappen1 will let it slide for today

user31 LOL taking a day off

landonorris smashed it

charles_leclerc so proud! an honour to share the podium with you

alex_albon papaya QUEEN

georgerussell63 never doubted you for a second!

mclaren that's our girl 🧡

user32 eating the right fruit this time 😂

carlossainz55 no one else i'd rather be beaten by 😊

lilymhe my fav girl boss

user33 everyone loves her sm 🥹🥹

user34 so happy for her i cried fr

yourbff my little legend <3

olliebearman

liked by yourusername, alex_albon, and others

olliebearman congratulations to our y/n on her first f1 podium so unbelievably proud of you and in awe of everything you do everyday. i love you 🩷

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

user35 OMGGG a whole post for her

user36 screaming this is so so cute

charles_leclerc ❤️❤️

liked by olliebearman, yourusername

maxverstappen1 oh

yourusername 🤨?

carlossainz55 this is actually very nice

georgerussell63 ...agree

landonorris 😳

olliebearman no way

yourusername you won them over....

alex_albon FINALLY

user37 scream

user38 hahahaha awww they finally accepted ollie 🙏

user39 obsessed with everything about this omg

user40 I LOVE OLLIEYN

yourusername stop it you'll make me cry!!!! i love you so much i couldn't have done it without you

olliebearman well you could but i appreciate the sentiment 😘

THE END 🧡❤️

[merlucide]

PLEASEEEEE CAN YOU WRITE HEADCANONS WITH RIN, KAISER, SAE, OTOYA AND REO AND A SHYREADER WHOS SHY AROUND PEOPLE SHE DOESNT KNOW BUT CRAZZYYYY AROUND PEOPLE SHE DOES KNOW PLSSSSS

BLLK BOYS WITH A SHY BUT CRAZY S/O

Notes: OFC WIFEY. Also… this scenario, seems, a bit self insert don’t you think…. 👀 ALSO LMAO I MADE READER UNHINGED?? SO- SORRY LMAO?

characters: Rin, Sae, Kaiser, Otoya, Reo

wc: about 300ish each

warnings: nb reader, cursing, randomness + cringe lmao😭

ITOSHI RIN

Well tbh, y’all probably had to have been friends for a loooong time for him to ever considering dating you 😭😭

So Rin had a good understanding of your personality, as you had known each other pretty much since the beginning of time.

He never understood how your personality went from 0 to 1000 whenever you two are alone. 

He prob thinks ur on drugs tbh

He’ll be your voice for you if you can’t seem to communicate with strangers, though he might not be the friendliest no shit.

he thinks it’s dumb that you’re shy tbh

He’s small minded about these things okay 😭

He never ever will get used to your bursts of crazy energy.

he swears he’ll turn around and you’ll have a horse mask on with a tutu around your waist

ITOSHI SAE

lmao you give him terrible whiplash.

He too, also thinks you’re on drugs.

You and Sae would like be at the airport on the way to Japan, his manager would be going over the details and precautions for going to Japan (yk fans and press or whatever etc etc).

His manager looked over to you and asked if you were alright, since you literally hadn’t spoken a word since he introduced himself a two hours ago. 

You nodded and followed Sae and his manager onto the private jet(cus he’s rich-rich😌🤭)

Once y’all were settled, his manager closed you and Sae’s cabin door. 

Sae looked over to see if you were alright, since traveling and yadda yadda can be overwhelming.

You were fucking giggling like an underwater hyena (that’s a thing I bc I fucking said so bitch).

You grabbed his hands and pulled back and forth giggling about how stoked you were rn.

LMAO HE WAS TOTALLY LOOKING AT U LIKE THIS

KAISER MICHEAL

lmao he was disturbed at first 💀

like “wtf happens to my shy, sweet, s/o??”

He’ll like be getting a glass of water at night and in the corner of his eye, you hold a flashlight at your face with a blanket wrapped around you. Staring into his soul, inches behind singing.

“hello darkness my old frienddd~”

He just blinked at you for a while. 

“Y/N what the fuck is wrong with you.”

ANYWHOOO!

He thinks it’s funny af though

Like how nervous you get around his teammates and then when y’all are home you start cartwheeling.

You sure keep his life ✨spontaneous✨

OTOYA EITA

LMAO A MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN

YOUR RANDOM AF.

HES RANDOM AF.

= SOULMATES

he thinks it’s so cute how shy you are

He loves that bc ur shy around strangers you cling/stay close to him. He feels so sigma male bc he’s ’protecting’ you🐺🐺🔊🔊🗣️🗣️😏😏

Someone humble him please.

LMAO HE’LL GO LIKE:

“Babe watch this😏” and ninja pose really fast LIKE A LITTLE KID DABBING

And you’ll be like:

“Nah watch this😌” *does the worm*

Y’all T-pose at pidgend together 💕 #couplegoals

MIKAGE REO

LMAO HE’LL BE DAYDREAMING AND LIKE-

“My dearest Y/N! Oh they’re such an angel! They’re so pretty and kind and perfect! And amazing- is that them in a dinosaur inflatable doing the WAP in 6 inch heels?”

lmao kinda how it goes

He never really gets used to the switch up.

It makes him so happy that you feel comfortable to be yourself around him, even if that means painting yourself pink and putting googly-eyes on while blasting the Peppa Pig intro💗

He loves hearing people talk about you too.

“Oh y/n is really shy, but they’re nice I guess?” Like hah okay..

Pretty sure they weren’t crab walking in a tuxedo with a kazoo in their mouth playing Sinfonia N°9 Coral in D Minor, Op. 125: 1. Allegro ma non troppo, un poco maestoso by Beethoven 🙄🙄

LMAO I HAD NO IDEA WERE I WAS GOING WITH THIS. I WAS LIKE “wtf am I gonna do😦”

made April 21st 2024

[harrysfolklore]

Can we get y/n as a total book worm and Harry just finding it so adorable, like no matter what she’s doing she always has a book in her hands. Cooking, has a book. Backstage, reading a book. At a cafe for breakfast, reading a book.

Ofc you don’t have tot do this idea, it’s just an idea

here it is !! one of my favorite tropes i’ve done coming to tumblr <3

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

coffeeandbookss - yn’s bookstagram

yourinstagram- yn’s personal insta

liked by emmachamberlain, gemmastyles and 15,937 others

coffeeandbookss Now reading: My policeman by Bethan Roberts ! In 1957, we meet Marion, a young woman hopelessly in love with Tom, her best friend’s brother. Tom — training to become a policeman — returns her affections, but holds a secret of his own. Will let you know my full review once done ! 💙

view all 2,986 comments

bookfan1 just added it to my list !

bookfan2 i love everything you recommend

bookfan3 started it this week !

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 3,938 others

harryupdates Harry just followed this account on instagram !

view all 846 comments

harryfan1 harry on his bookstagram era

harryfan2 AHH ONE OF MY FAVE BOOK CREATORS

harryfan3 she’s so pretty also

harryfan4 IM SUBSCRIBED TO HER YOUTUBE CHANNEL shes soooo good

liked by yoursister, gemmastyles and 1,937 others

yourinstagram um harry styles follows mt bookstagram?? am i dreaming?

view all 527 comments

yoursister YOU LUCKY BITCH

gemmastyles I’d love to think I’m responsible for that, I kept talking about your account 🫣

↳ yourinstagram love you gem thanks for your constant support 💓

username1 you’re the best out there

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 3,986 others

harryupdates Harry in London today ! He carried this book with himself

view all 985 comments

harryfan1 he’s really in his books era

harryfan2 i started that book the other week omg

harryfan3 omw to buy it

harryfan4 my favorite booktuber just recommended this omg

DMS BETWEEN HARRY AND YN

//

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 4,937 others

harryupdates Harry having dinner tonight !

view all 826 comments

harryfan1 OHHH

harryfan2 is that a DATE

harryfan3 boyfriendrry?

harryfan4 respect his privacy

liked by harrystyles, gemmastyles and 10,872 others

yourinstagram happy days :)

view all 3,983 comments

harryfan1 um why did harry like?

gemmastyles my babies 🥹

↳ harryfan2 hello are we missing something

harrystyles ❤️

↳ harryfan2 HELLO?

harryfan4 i’m so confused right now

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 201,928 others

tmz_tv Seems like Harry Styles got a new girl. More of his beach outing at the link in our bio 👀

view all 17,928 comments

harryfan1 wtffff

harryfan2 WHO IS THAT

harryfan3 man i hate tmz

harryfan4 FIND OUT WHO THE GIRL IS RIGHT NOW

↳ harryfan1 i think their privacy was disturbed enough already

↳ harryfan2 yeah we’re shouldn’t snoop around trying to dig personal information of whoever the girl with him is

harryfan6 sucks as hell that they took these without their consent but i can’t help but be all 🥲🥲 over the fact that they’re reading together

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 4,029 others

theharrytea okay yall so i was watching yn’s latest video because of all the rumors going around her and harry (yk he followed her and commented on her posts and harry has been seen with someone we don’t know yet) AND i swear to god i heard his voice around min 7 😭 you could clearly hear that someone opens the door and a faint “sorry” I KNOW MY MAN’S VOICE AND THAT WAS HIS

view all 108 comments

harryfan1 OH

harryfan2 omfg i can hear it now

harryfan3 y’all are tripping at this point

harryfan4 delulu

harryfan5 idk if any of this is true but they would make a cute couple like they would ready to each other and stuff :(

YN VIA INSTAGRAM STORIES

//

liked by harrystyles, annetwist and 107,837 others

coffeeandbookss This week’s recommendation is presented by my brand new reading partner ! Love is a Mixtape is a soulful book, written as a way of understanding not only love and loss, but also the way music is can get us through those happy or sad times ! Full review this weekend ��

view all 43,973 comments

bookfan1 IS THAT HARRY STYLES ??

annetwist ❤️❤️

harryfan1 HARRYYYYY

harryfan2 THEY ARE SOOO DATING

harrystyles It is my pleasure to be featured x

↳ harryfan3 OMFG THEY FR ARE DATING

gemmastyles 🥹

harryfan4 I MEAN we kinda already knew it was her who has seen kissing harry BUT I LOVE THIS HARD LAUNCH

liked by yourinstagram, gemmastyles and 6,837,927 others

harrystyles She’s got a book for every situation x

view all 96,836 comments

harryfan1 AHHH IS THIS YN

jefezoff 🙌🏻🙌🏻

harryfan2 LOVE ME A HARD LAUNCH

gemmastyles ❤️

harryfan3 harry is not single anymore omfg

yourinstagram 🥹💓

harryfan4 COUPLE OF THE YEAR

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2 and 27,947 others

harryismysun Worth the shot

view all 3,097 comments

harryfan1 PLEASEEEEE

harryfan2 you're so funny

harryfan3 i love this fandom

yourinstagram 😂😂 I can confirm this is how it all went down

↳ harryfan1 I LOVE HER

↳ harryfan2 she's the best

taglist: @lightsoutstyles @willowpains @straightontilmornin n @sleutherclaw @gimsaysay @hazzassmirk @platinumbarbie143 @musicforcinemas @celesteblack08 @scntfrhs @eleanordaisy @lomlolivia @iceebabies @iloveshawn @be-with-me-so-happily @watermelonsugacry @rayisthehoe @drewrry

[natailiatulls07]

The Golden Trio

Lando Norris x female!reader

Carlos Sainz x female!reader

Max Verstappen & Female!reader & Charles Leclerc

Summary - Being bestfriends with two famous formula one drivers is never easy, but what will happen when you get involved with yet another formula one driver??

Warning - offensive names hate comments swearing slight arguments

A/n - there will be a part two, however I’m thinking of making this a series so keep an eye out for that 🤍

The golden trio

-

yourusername

Sorry boys, mother Taylor called 🤩

Liked by landonorris and 49,273 others

username Probably using the money of Charles and Max

username Could’ve been there to support her bestfriends but chose to ignore them and be selfish, slut

maxverstappen1 Betrayal 😣

= charles_leclerc It was bond to happen, remember when she made us stay up to try for tickets with her??!

= yourusername I would’ve taken you two but you were busy with something 🙄

username The fact that she choose Taylor over supporting her two bestfriends, fake ass bitch

= username She has a life of her own, she doesn’t need to follow them around the world yk so shut your mouth 😘

username Love the midnights inspired outfit 😍

charles_leclerc posted a story

maxverstappen1

Got the book worm out in the fresh air 🌊

Tagged: charles_leclerc yourusername

Liked by arthur_leclerc and 42,193 others

username She doesn’t deserve this sort of treatment, she’s just a whore who only wants their dicks and money

username The golden trio are really glowing in that sun 😍

landonorris Where was my invite?!

= yourusername They wouldn't let me :(

= charles_leclerc Good ahead blame us!

= yourusername That's because you are the ones to blame 😊

username Is that DR3 merch I see???

= yourusername yes I'm his biggest supporter 😋

= username oh great another f1 driver that she’ll steal money from

f1gossip

Spotted: Outside of her shared apartment with Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen, Y/n L/n is looking a bit annoyed. Did something happen?? How are Max and Charles feeling?? That’s the real question 👀

If anyone has any more links to what is going on please DM me 🙏🏻

Liked by username and 5,203 others

username Why are you just assuming thing??

username It’s obvious that she’s the one to blame

username I wonder where she’s going

= username Probably to a bar or a club with their cards 😒

= username It’s giving gold digger energy

username I hope the golden trio is okay 😕

landonorris posted a story

Gossip Groupchat (white: Reader) (red: Charles) (blue: Max)

Please come back to the apartment Y/n, we’re sorry

Yeah we never meant to say those things

You’ve got to be kidding me! This is an actual fucking joke

I’m sorry, we don’t know what was going through our minds

I have been you’re bestfriend for years! Years of constant hate on social media, I’ve been called every name under the sun because I’m friends with you two! And then you both go and decide that it’s okay to practically agree with that hate, wtf!

I know and we’re sorry and we mean that sorry so much

Please, just come back to the apartment

I can’t, not tonight or tomorrow.

Where will you stay??

Lando’s, we bumped into each other at the club and if you got a problem with that, you can shut your fucking mouth

Okay, we love you Bee

Yeah, I agree with Charles. We do love you so much Bee

I know, I just need space rn

-

[mrghostrat]

Oh god I can totally see why PA/CEO is so hard to choose between.. on one hand you have crowley biting ppl who try to make aziraphale a doormat (so sweet! he's a NICE asshole! just don't say that to his face lmao) and on the other you have aziraphale dragging crowley out of his golden girls marathons to Get. Things. Done. (sassy angel! most ppl see crowley as Cool while aziraphale has and will have to listen to him yell at his plants then secretly take them to a neighbors house again!!)

GOD. THE BRAIN WORMS ARE CONTAGIOUS. Maybe you could take the dynamics of one and put it in another au??? Like uhhh

* bodyguard crowley from Version A

* um. okay that's all I can thinks of- WAIT. WAIT AAIT WAIT.

* AUTHOR CROWLEY, EDITOR AZIRAPHALE, VERSION B DYNAMICS... consider. Consider consider consider. 👀👀👀

[pillowspace]

This is silly and stupid but i notice you done would you still love me if i was a worm for sunna and Meno (in eclipse form) and y/n and moon. Can we perhaps have a sun one-? 🪱👀

Y/N - Would you still love me if I was a worm?

Sun - OF COURSE! If you were a worm, I would put you in a perfect habitat fit for all of your wormy needs. Oh, and it would have the softest of itty bitty worm pillows too! Did you know that there are over 20,000 species of worms? Do you have a favourite? I think tha

[athanasius-symposium-of-writings]

White Knight Ithaqua who has feelings for a low-nobility reader (who does also like him a bit) 👀 she's the last living heir of the dying family line, and about to be married off by her desperate father to a cruel husband for the money the sustain their status. She cares nothing for status, and knows of both Ithaqua's fearsome reputation and feelings for her...so she asks him to kill her father, so she'll be free of that fate, and in exchange she'll happily be with him.

heheheheheheh

Rated Mature | Warning: none

Ithaqua with the purple blue lipstick save me

“Ithaqua.” You stand in front of him as sits on the chair in the room, his legs open as he relaxes— Content like a cat after being fed a treat. The wedding, the union between himself and you, is complete. Finally, he has you! The lady of his dreams, the only person alive who knows him as a boy who was once shy and gentle. You promised to marry the boy who lived in the woods with his mother, she was the maid you liked the most. Red hair she would let you braid as she would teach you how to read, her smile bright and you try to match it. She was a sweet woman who was like a mother to you while your father was being a fool. Your mother died not long after you were born, the rumors say your father had her killed for having an affair. An affair that was not true.

“Would you do anything for me?

Ithaqua, the fearsome White Knight, stares at you with eyes you know are to be full of a love that would scare anyone else. Without his helmet, you see the face, the change from the gentle to the sharp man who would cut down the mightiest of the White King’s enemies. His dark purple edging on blue-painted lips formed a Cheshire grin. He stands up and snatches you close to him, his hands on your waist as his forehead touches yours.

“Anything.”

You use one hand to guide him to touch your ass, your other hand beginning to open his uniform, and you angle your face to brush against his lips as you speak. “Will you kill for me?” Softly asking with your eyes locked with his.

Your father used to be of high status before his greed got the best of him. He plotted with others to overthrow the White King with the assistance of the Black Monarchy. He was able to worm his way out of an execution and keep some of his status. All he had to do was easily betray those who were trying to betray the kingdom. You hate him for using you as a way to remain in the good graces of the White King. The White Knight was gifted you, an offering to a monster expected to devour you.

“Within reason.” He moves in to kiss you but you pull back. A warning growl but his grin never fades, “Does murder get you off these days, (Name).”

“No, this is not a murder but a way to free your wife.” You tilt your head back as he attacks your neck and squeezes your ass, “My father. I want him to be cold on the ground by tomorrow.”

“Oh,” Then he laughs, “No honeymoon?” Licking the column of your throat before biting into the side marking you as his.

“If you kill him fast enough you can return to me with his blood on your hand and claim me.”

He moves back to look at your very serious face, his grin gone as he is surprised to hear the hatred in your voice, “You’ve changed.”

“Not willingly, I wish I was still the girl who would chase you to play with me.” You yearn for her, for the woman she has turned into these days. Cold and calculating, your loyalty is to the kingdom and now your husband. “Will you free me?”

“Free you? This will only lock the last shackle to me.”

“So be it. You still love me, I know you will not toss me to another.”

He hums before going back to marking your neck, “In silver and blood you are bound to me.” Silver for the ring and blood for the man who will die tonight.

[pixiemage]

You had a post a while back saying you were gonna rant about the canary and coalmine thing AGAIN...what rant would that be? 👀

Oh boy, you're opening a can of worms here lmao.

(A very fun can of worms that gives me lovely lovely brainrot every time I lift the lid :3)

I've actually made a post about this before (god knows I can't find it right now), but the long and short of it is that I've see too many people call Tango the coalmine to Jimmy's canary.

Except...he isn't. He's not.

Tango is not the coalmine.

The coalmine is the thing killing the canary. The coalmine is what the canary is trying to warn people against, and the coalmine is what the miners have to make a glass tank to save the canary from. Tango's not a danger to Jimmy like that. Tango's not a threat.

Yeah, yes, Tango takes Jimmy's first life in the Life series (3rd Life, Dare to Flare), and also causes their first mutual loss of life in Double Life (creeper explosion). But I don't count that as volatile enough to make Tango the coalmine.

No, Tango, in my eyes, is the coal miner. The one that's in just as much danger in that coalmine as the canary. The one who hurt the canary by bringing it into danger in the first place, and regretted it. The one who is so very grateful for the canary that saved his life/gave him hope/helped him by providing bright colors and beautiful music in a dangerous place, that he built a glass oxygen case to save the canary's life in exchange.

So no, Tango is NOT the coalmine. The Life Games are the coalmine, and Tango is just the miner that journeyed into danger with a canary, Jimmy, at his side. They save each other and support each other in a place that has potential death around any corner. (Not every corner, but any corner.)

The Canary and the Coal Miner. With teamwork and camaraderie like that built right into the metaphor, how can anything else possibly be a better fit?

[madelynraemunson]

CALL ME WHAT YOU WANT 𓆩♡𓆪

(Book #1 of the Hellfire Gentlemen's Club)

(strip club owner!eddie x fem!exotic dancer!hargrove!x reader)

𝐌𝐎𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐍 𝐀𝐔 18+ only, minors i am ON PATROL

Chapter 011: Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

Movie night is cut short when Billy and Eddie both show up to your door in search of compromise.

↳ chapters: 001, 002*, 003** , 004**, 005 , 006 , 007* , 008**, 009, 010, 011, 012* , 013**, 014**, 015, 016**, 017, 018, 019, 020*

somewhat smut = *

smut =**

word count: 4.5k words

disclaimers — eddie’s bruised lil face, billy’s bruised face, no one is beating the living daylights out of the other this time. 😵‍💫 just a lot of ✨ fluff ✨ and you guessed it… ANGST , traumatic flashback, max being a mastermind with her plotting & scheming 👀

“My head is saying ‘Fool, forget him!’, my heart is saying ‘Don’t Let Go’…”

♡

Isabelle Munson is a menace and a half.

It’s obvious that Eddie’s ex wife married him for one thing and one thing only: his money. And, when caught in her web of lies, Isabelle quickly threw him under the bus to cover her trail.

“What, are you trying to take over Hellfire or something?”

It’s no wonder why Eddie freaked out on you like that. The clinginess and need for control over your ‘situationship’ probably set off all the necessary alarms in his head. Even though Eddie probably knew your intentions, he didn’t want to risk the possibility of another Isabelle. After all, she too started as an employee.

POP! Snap! Fizz…

Max pours a can of soda into her ice cold tumbler. She stirs it around before taking a few sips.

"Your boss’s ex wife sounds like a bitch," she comments.

"The biggest bitch," you shake your head. "I’m reading up on all the tea right now."

A paramour for control, Isabelle’s calling to make Hellfire all about her started affecting the work-life balance. So, Eddie sent her to NDA Gentlemen’s Club in order to keep their affairs separate. But then a romantic affair began to brew between Isabelle and Terry, the owner and actual culprit behind the scandal. And of course that opened up another can of worms.

“Why would Isabelle wanna put Eddie behind bars instead of the guy who actually tried to sex traffic her?” Max inquires.

“Terry Hobb was already gonna be arrested,” you discover. “If Eddie went under too, Isabelle would likely be entitled to his assets while he’s locked up. Probably what she wanted all along.”

Framing Eddie for a crime. Something that’s so easy to do in Hawkins.

Like Billy said, Eddie coming from a long line of criminals did NOT help his case. Drug dealer, murderer. Con-man and arsonist. Eddie being someone who trafficked the vulnerable would be easy to believe, especially in a town full of conservative women who were tired of their husbands coming home late — and drenched in glitter.

To bear the Munson name is not exactly a blessing. Even the woman Eddie made a Munson managed to do him dirty.

There’s another kind of wolf that Mom never warned you about: the one dressed in white — the wolf in sheep’s clothing.

“This is all so awful,” you swallow hard, finally planting your phone face down onto the kitchen table.

And now Eddie’s business is in jeopardy again. All thanks to two volatile Hargroves who have no sense of self control.

"Why do I feel like there's something there?"

Max brings you back to earth. When you turn, she’s smirking at you.

“What do you mean?” you ask her.

“Oh come on,” Max rolls her eyes. “You seem really bothered by this. And Eddie beat THE LIVING SHIT out of Billy. Doesn’t seem like he does it for just any employee.”

You feel yourself blushing. Not only that but Eddie never fights anybody, period. He’s always called on Henry to do all the dirty work for him.

But Eddie knew about Billy and how powerless he made you feel. Seeing your abuser meandering so comfortably around his establishment was probably the last straw.

“There…might be something,” you confirm. “It’s hard though. Eddie doesn’t wanna commit.”

“Well after a marriage that traumatizing I wouldn’t either,” Max shrugs. “I’d be deathly afraid of women for the rest of my life.”

She walks over to grab the two bowls of popcorn that you guys heated up for everybody. You two, along with Vicky and Robin, are having a movie night to wind down from all the chaos. Tonight’s choice is Grease.

"Alright kiddos, camp is almost set up!" Robin dances her way into the kitchen. "We ready for some Grease Lightnin'?"

Max swoons as she adds some more key ingredients to her popcorn. "Hell yeah! Love me some Travolta and showtunes."

“What are you doing?” Robin asks, watching your sister douse your shared popcorn bowl with cayenne pepper and lime.

“A lil California spin on mine and Sissy's popcorn,” Max shrugs. “A squeeze of lime and some tajín. Well — cayenne pepper — since we don’t have any."

“That’s outrageous.”

“Wait till you see what we do with street corn,” you gush, dreaming about elote.

“Oh god…” Robin goes pale white.

“No really, Robin! It’s pretty good,” you insist.

“Not that!” Robin shakes her head. She points out the window. “That…”

You turn in the direction that Robin points in, which is outside towards the street.

Billy.

“Billy,” you gasp silently.

Your brother is parked along the curb, climbing out of his rental car with a little pep in his step. You watch as he checks his, relatively bruised, appearance, tugging at his hair and giving his clothes one last pat-down before making his way over.

Concerned footsteps dart their way into the kitchen. Vicky looks just as mortified as Robin.

"Do y'all see this?" Vicky questions.

Everyone nods to validate.

"How does Billy know where we live?!" you demand turning to the only other person here who has his phone number.

Guilt spreads across Max's face. As mortified as you are, you can't blame her. The fucked up parts of yourself would've done the same thing. You and Billy were in dire need of a heart to heart.

"You guys need to talk," Max explains what you're thinking. "I'm not letting him leave without at least a word or two. He agreed to be civil when I texted him."

"Thanks," you mumble. "I would've done the same."

Anyone who didn't fully understand the dynamic would've thought you and Max were crazy. But there is a part of you that will always love Billy.

Billy’s getting closer now. You can hear him clearing his throat from outside.

“So are we going to need the fire department too?” Robin asks, phone readily in hand.

“Most likely,” Vicky shrugs.

“No one’s calling anybody,” you instruct. “At least not yet. Let’s just see what he wants first.”

Billy's at the door now and you have no choice but to answer. You swing it open before he could even get a knock in, knuckle floating in mid-air but slowly drifting back down when he sees you in front of him.

Your big brother. At least by two minutes.

“Sup,” Billy greets you, almost jokingly. He flashes you a peace sign. Hi. I come in peace.

“You look awful.”

“Yeah, mosh pits aren’t really my scene,” he takes a sly jab at Eddie.

He requests entry into your new humble abode to which you deny. Billy backs down without question. So instead you walk out into the porch and close the door behind you.

“Before you press charges,” you preface. “I just want you to know how hardworking, kind, and empathetic Eddie i-”

Billy stops you with a raised hand. “I’m not…pressing charges.”

You’re almost stunned. “You…you’re not?”

“No,” Billy’s eyes are sullen. “I started it.”

“Eddie threw the first punch,” you point out. “If anything all you did was provoke him, which obviously won’t hold up well for him in court-”

“I…” Billy insists. “…started it.”

You don’t question it anymore because you can sense aggression brewing. And you preferred to talk to Billy when he’s calm like this.

Both of you take a seat right on the porch stairs. You can feel Vicky, Robin, and Max staring from inside.

“I deserved it,” Billy shakes his head. “And everything else coming to me for what I’ve done.”

“You don’t deserve it,” you try to convince him — and even yourself — of what you’re saying.

“YOU don’t even believe that,” Billy says, seeing through the bullshit. “Just fucking save it, okay?”

It's not like you can deny it any longer. Billy is the reason why you and Max are in this situation.

“I could’ve killed Max if I had been any more careless,” Billy grieves. “All because, what, she threw a box at me? And punched a hole in the wall because I said shit that made her do it. What I did made me lose everything I had left. Made me lose you guys."

Accountability, that's the first step. You turn away from him, refusing to believe this new change of heart.

"I didn’t honor your wishes to be left alone or at least given a little space..." he continues. "Showed up to your safe space and overstayed my welcome. And it blew up in front of me. Probably shattered my septum too."

"Do you see now?" you choke. "Do you see why we can't live with each other?"

"I'm sure we can, we just gotta change our ways."

"We've been trying to change our ways since Dad and Sue left!" you hiss. "Since Mom died, since the first crack in the glass. We change, but it just evolves into something worse."

Crickets on Billy's end. You can tell he's sitting with the words, no matter how uncomfortable they feel. But that alone is another big step.

You turn to stroke his face. He closes his eyes in dismay, soaking in all the affection radiating off your delicate, trembling hands.

“Look at what we do to each other, Billy," you plead. "It's not like this when we're apart."

Billy opens his eyes. They’re glistening with tears.

You fill him in on the friends you've made in Hawkins. How much your bank account grew. The payments you’ve caught up on since stripping at Hellfire. How you and Max sleep comfortably through the night. After what seems like forever.

Life is beautiful without Billy. As much as you didn’t want that to be true.

Billy finally speaks again. “What happened to us?”

“I don’t know,” you shake your head. “And until we can both get our shit together, we need to stay away from each other.”

And now it’s 1998. You and Billy are four years old, playing tug-o-war over the last chocolate chip cookie in the jar.

CRASH! went the jar when it fell to the floor.

You’re both in trouble now. Or so you thought.

Billy ended up winning this round, scurrying off with the cookie while you attempted to sweep the broken shards of glass away. But knowing Billy had gotten a beating several days prior — it was BAD this time — you decided to take all the blame.

“Say ‘Sorry Daddy’ right now,” your father ordered after three aggressive spanks to your backside.

Bent across his lap, you bite your tongue as he issues two more spanks with his large, calloused hands. It was sure to leave a mark.

“SAY IT,” Dad roared.

But you weren’t sorry. So it came out strained.

“‘m sorry Daddy,” you sniff. “And I’m sorry… Billy.”

The last word wasn’t worth it. It was never worth it.

Your buttcheeks were burning, eyes stinging with salty, resentful tears as Dad continued to use you as an outlet for his rage. When you thought it was over, Dad chucked you off his lap, pulling you by the hair to toss you against the wall like it was some dodgeball game at the Y.

Billy’s eyes watched in horror. Your eyes burned into his as he poked his curious head out from the wall he was hiding behind.

“Doing it for you,” you mouthed to him.

Later that night, your bruised behind hobbled side to side to your shared room after your bedtime routine. To your pleasant surprise, there was something waiting for you on a small plate at the foot of your bed.

The last chocolate chip cookie.

You and Billy never apologized to each other back then. So acts of service like saving each other the last sweet treat made for a good alternative.

Billy walked over to you as you fawned over the last cookie. You turned to him in disbelief.

“I thought you ate it,” you smiled.

“No, I was saving it,” Billy lied. “All for you, Sissy.”

“It used to be us against the world,” Billy recalls. “As cheesy as that shit sounds.”

“But now it’s just...not,” you point out. “We just can’t be in each other’s lives. We gotta love each other from afar, Billy. At least until we can figure out how to be civil with each other.”

Billy doesn’t speak for a while. Instead he takes a look around the neighborhood. The tall trees that decorate the telephone poles. The flat land that perfectly accentuates the edge of the horizon. The fresh air, slightly corrupted with the overpowering scent of Marlboro. It’s no quaint beach town, but there was something about it that screamed “home” in no way San Diego can.

“Are you sure this is something you wanna do?” Billy questions you, referring to your job. “It’s not a safe gig, sis.”

“I can handle it,” you insist. “It’s temporary anyways.”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this…” he sighs. “But I’m proud of you… ass and tits out and all.”

“Gee thanks,” you joke as you nudge him. “I’m glad I have your approval.”

After a while, you two finally stand up and make your way inside. Max is reluctant to walk towards Billy when he walks in, but that same invisible cord inclines her to do so anyway.

“You still don’t like me, huh?” Billy infers.

Max crosses her arms. “How can I?”

A timid smile forms across Billy’s face. “But you don’t hate me?”

Max repeats her sentiment. “How can I?”

She runs to him and snakes her arms tightly around his waist and he swings her around. Max giggles like a child when he playfully ruffles her hair.

“Seriously, how can I?” she questions. “I’d really like to take an expert class on how to hate you.”

Billy chuckles. “You need money for school books?”

“No, Sis got me on that.”

“Of course she does,” Billy says, peering over at you. “You’re in good hands.”

You formally introduce your brother to Robin and Vicky but it’s an awkward ordeal. Can't expect your good friends to get along with the person whose choked you out on multiple occasions throughout most of your life. Slapped you around as well. Pulled your hair and tainted your body black and blue. Calls you "bitch" and "slut" wherever he sees fit. But still loves you with everything he's got. And you, him.

Trauma is a weird thing.

Billy didn’t intend to stay for long, so he sees himself out shortly after that.

“Alright, I’ll text you when I leave,” Billy announces. “Call me. Please. If you two need anything.”

“Okay,” you smile. “We’ll be sure to answer this time too whenever you call.”

Billy gives you a half-assed salute as he swings the door open. He nearly shifts himself backwards when an unexpected surprise greets him at the door.

Eddie.

Standing 5-foot-10 with a face full of contusions and cat-like scratches is your boss. Eddie cringes when he sees Billy, eliciting a similar reaction from your brother the moment they register each other.

The silence is deafening.

There’s an urge to pick up where they left off, but both men refrain from doing so for your sake. Billy stomps off, shaking his head without meeting Eddie’s eyes.

Eddie turns to you. Waits until Billy is out of earshot to speak.

“You’re right about your brother being a douche."

You laugh. Eddie gives you that puppy dog pout with his chocolate brown eyes. You want to forget about him so bad. You want to let him go. But your heart is yearning for more.

“Do you still hate me?”

“Kinda,” you shrug. “But less so by the minute.”

“I deserved that.”

You can’t help it anymore. Eddie tries his best not to wince when you fall into him, wrapping your arm around his waist and burying your head in his chest.

He rubs your back gently before ruffling your hair. Then he plants a gentle kiss onto your forehead. It launches you into squeezing him tighter.

“You okay?” he mumbles.

You nod into his chest and he strokes your hair, allowing you all the time you need to let you guard down.

“How long is he staying in town?”

“Forgot to ask,” you answer him honestly. “Probably not for long.”

“You should board up your windows just in case,” Eddie says half-jokingly. “Install a few more locks. Probably a few cameras.”

You tsk. “Okay, I don’t think I need to get that carried away.”

“Fine,” Eddie shrugs. “Of course I can always stay the night too.”

His fingers dance up the small of your back, causing you to inhale sharply out of arousal.

“Protect you a lil more…” he continues.

“Yeah I don’t think so, Munson,” Robin clears her throat, knowingly interrupting the sappy moment you’re sharing. “Movie night is for the girls only.”

“You know I can always leave it to you to cock-block, Buckley,” Eddie laughs. It’s a reminiscent one. “Thought your silhouette looked familiar at Hellfire.”

Your eyes dart between them both.

“You guys know each other?!”

“We all went to school together,” Vicky explains, coming back into sight as well. “The three of us were all in the same band class at one point.”

“Until ‘Dungeons’ over here thought he was too cool for us,” Robin adds. “And started his own band.”

“I was always a lil eccentric, wasn’t I?” Eddie winks. “Thanks for remembering. Though Corroded Coffin is all a distant memory now.”

“So that means you guys went to school with Steve too?” you direct your question towards Robin and Vicky.

Vicky raises an eyebrow. “Steve? Like… Steve Steve? Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington?”

“You know King Steve?” Robin scoffs, completely baffled. She crosses her arms in amusement.

“Oh she knows King Steve,” Eddie smirks. “Knows him real well.”

“Jealous much?” you quip.

“I plead the fifth,” Eddie mutters.

“And I plead that we all know less and less about each other,” Max sighs. You almost forget that she’s there. “If you’ll excuse me.”

The girlfriends follow Max back into their room to continue with movie night. Now you’re left alone again with Eddie.

You stare up at him.

“Are you okay?”

“Just a couple ruffled feathers, I’ll be fine,” he dismisses your concern.

"You've got a great deal of damage control to do when we go back.”

“Eh,” Eddie shrugs. “Wouldn’t be the first time my business was in trouble.”

You laugh and roll your eyes.

“And for as long as you’re along for the ride? This probably won’t be my last.”

“Swinging at my estranged family members, my hero my hero,” you joke, finding yourself leaning into him further.

And then you kiss him. It's your first advance in a while that Eddie doesn't shy away from. He kisses you back, with an ignited passion that surpasses even the electricity from Saturday in his van. It's an aching, and a longing.

His lips interlace ever so comfortably with yours. He's missed you so. And you missed him too. Even when you were being irrationally jealous over Nina.

“Gettin’ me in so much trouble, Hargrove,” Eddie grazes your back as he slowly pulls away.

And your eyes can’t help but trail down to his hands. Knuckles bloody, fingers absent of any rings for once, tan lines on all but one special finger.

“Did you love Isabelle?”

Eddie stares at you like you’re insane.

"Of course I did,” he insists. “She was my wife. There were some warning signs that she was after my money though, but I was too stubborn to believe it was true.”

You nod.

"But now you know," Eddie grins in exhaustion. “Now you know why I’m guarded. Because like you, even Isabelle looked like a dream”. He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as he mumbles, “Too good to be true.”

Your heart shatters for him.

“You need to start saying what’s really on your mind,” you say to him. “Speaking up, asking for help. I’m tired of watching you fight battles alone.”

“Then don’t look,” Eddie jokes. One second later and he’s back to being serious. “It’s pretty hard to trust people when they prove to you time and time again why you shouldn’t.”

He steals some popcorn from your bowl, tossing it up into the air. It successfully lands in his mouth.

“Besides. I’ve come this far without anyone, but Wayne’s, help. And I turned out fine.”

You glare at him.

“Couple scrapes and bruises,” he continues, alluding to his scuffle with Billy. “But I’m fine.”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

Eddie offers you a look.

“What, you think I’m bluffing?”

“No,” the pitch in your voice heightens. “I just think…a healed person would let a little love in.”

Then those sad doe eyes meet you again, the kind of gaze that would cause anyone to go weak in the knees. You swallow hard.

“Please be patient with me,” Eddie mumbles. “I’m really trying.”

“I know you are,” you rub his arm. “We don’t have to rush into anything.”

You both lean into each other again, the need to have and be with each other a palpable energy between your torsos. You beam up at him as you run your fingers down his hair.

“I am ready for something though,” Eddie proposes. “I’d like to keep whatever this is going.”

“I’d like that too,” you heart begins to flutter.

You picture yourself grocery shopping at Meijer with Eddie. He’d push for you to buy desserts, but you’d remind him that he needs veggies in his life. You see yourselves going to the pumpkin patch as autumn approaches and taking goofy Polaroids by the scarecrows. And it’s like he’s already in front of you on Christmas, his tongue poking out slightly — like it always does when he’s deeply focused on something — as he fixates on making his gingerbread house a gingerbread home. And when the ball drops on New Year’s Eve, he is going to be your kiss, dipping you like the one sailor did with the nurse in that one iconic picture of the world war being over. And then you two would recreate that same pose when you take him back home to experience a San Diego summer.

A romance for the books.

“Just…sex and quickies all the time!” Eddie speaks, instantly yanking you out of your daydream. “Smoking together…asking each other about our day…cuddling, in the nude…”

Suddenly, Eddie’s cock-blocked himself with his fantasy that he revealed to you. The familiar tinge in your chest returns again.

“Oh…hooking up is what you meant,” you nod.

“Duh, what else?”

You swallow hard again. So now you know what this is all about. You know now what he really saw when he looked at you.

“So… just purely sex. I gotcha.”

“Whoa, don’t put it like that,” Eddie grimaces. “It sounds bad. We’ll get to the titles eventually, I just gotta dip my toes in first.”

“I don’t want you dipping any of you in anything,” you glare at him with disgust. “Sorry but for a while I thought you liked me for me.”

“I do, Shy Girl,” Eddie insists. “I’m just not ready for titles yet. We literally just got done talking about that.”

“Oh, but you wanna keep me around as a fuck doll, that’s it?”

“Don’t act like you don’t have needs yourself…” he protests.

“Yeah and Steve is meeting those needs,” you hiss. “The reason I’m bouncing between you guys is because Steve is my fuck buddy, but I’m willing to let him go if you want to be exclusive with me. Which I don’t get why you won’t call it exclusive if that’s theoretically the case.”

But should’ve known Eddie only saw you as a booty call. You two hang out at nighttime, flirt, and touch each other too often for that to not be a case. And, of course, when something else catches his eyes, Eddie moves on and simply pays you no mind.

“I thought you saw this going somewhere,” you scoff as you cross your arms. “Beyond a mattress and the back of your van.”

“I thought I saw this going somewhere too,” Eddie shrugs bitterly. “But now that you mention it, someone who is always questioning my intentions without letting me explain myself doesn’t deserve the title anyways.”

Could Eddie stomp on your heart any more?

Did he just expect you to wait around for him? Did he expect you to run around with ‘Reserved For Eddie’ while he decided how much of himself to give you on whatever day? None of it is fair. But Eddie doesn’t play fair. He just calls the shots, as always.

And to think the two of you would come to any sort of compromise tonight.

“Goodnight, Eddie.”

“Hargr-”

“Good…night… Eddie.”

“The power you’re supplying… it’s electrifying.”

Defeated, you end up excusing yourself from the rest of movie night and lugging yourself to your room. Max is in the room too, a huge surprise considering John Travolta was metaphorically a room over.

“Oh she is cuuute,” Max raves.

She’s talking about the red lingerie set from Nocturna, you realize when you drag your feet into your room.

“Thanks,” you shrug sheepishly, taking the set back from jet. “Eddie bought it for me to wear actually.”

You take the set in your hands and smooth it out just a little. It’s such a pretty set. Now it’s just collecting dust, a shame because you loved how amazing you looked and felt in it.

“Why don’t you wear it to Hellfire?” Max suggests. “I’m sure Henry would love it if you did for his dance in a couple days.”

“You want me to wear it for Henry?” you scoff. “That’s a no. Eddie doesn’t wanna see me wearing that specific set for anyone else but him.”

“Hmmm,” Max thinks. “We’re talking about the same Eddie. Right? Eddie ‘Non-Committal’ Munson?”

You smirk. She smirks. Your sister is a genius.

If Eddie truly doesn’t want to commit to you and make you his, then there is no need for you to commit to him either.

And the DEVIL WOMAN set is clearly no exception. There’s no need for a hot outfit like that to go to waste.

“I’m picking up what you’re putting down…” you grin, a rather wolf-in-sheep’s-clothing grin.

Max rubs her evil little fingers together. “Figured you might.”

“TELL ME ABOUT IT!” you two hear Robin and Vicky yell from their room. “STUD!”

And ‘You’re The One That I Want’ starts blaring through the speakers.

Its a shame that you and Max were missing your favorite part of the entire movie. But you two have your own revenge plot in the works.

And you, you’ve got your own dance number to practice. A dance for the One that you want. In this case, it’s Henry.

“You better shape up because I need a man. And my heart is set on you.”

Oh Eddie…

Let the mental gymnastics begin.

—————————

author's note: when eddie goes low, shy girl goes lower…. do you guys think eddie will be mad seeing shy girl dancing for henry in the red set he bought her? 🤔😈

—————————

🏷️ tag list: @battymunson , @the-fairy-anon , @ali-r3n , @corrodedcoffincumslut , @bebe07011 , @mmunson86 , @eddiesguitarskills , @chelebelletx , @imonhereforareasonsadly , @eddies-trailer-babe @hideoutside , @motherfckerr , @jxps i , @munson-magic , @lindseyj23, @sidthedollface2 , @manda-panda-monium , @elvendria , @micheledawn1975 , @hereforshmut , @siriuslysmoking , @nymphetkoo , @m-chmcl-rmnc , @justinelittlewoodsworld , @ahoyyharrington , @keepittoyourselftellnobodyelse @kellyxo1 @emsgoodthinkin @winchester-angel @chloe-6123 , @redbarn1995 @angietherose @kiyastrf94 , @purplewitchcauldron

[petite-phthora]

Do you think it was a date?

[DP x DC fic]

[Love at first... murder? - part 5]

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Part 1

Ao3

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In-chat nicknames:

Daniel = Danny

Sharpshooter = Jazz

TooFine= Tucker

Chaos = Sam

TheCoolerDaniel = Danielle/Dani/Ellie

---

Private chat nicknames:

Bill = Danny

Pants = Jazz

---

As soon as Danny enters his apartment, face bright red, he takes his head into his hands and lets out a silent scream.

He could have said anything, and he panicked and went with Toodealoo Kangaroo???

At this rate, he’ll never get a partner.

As Danny stands there in misery, his phone starts buzzing with messages. Curious, he checks his phone to see what going on.

Uh oh.

---

Team Phantom 👻😎

Chaos: Guys check this out

Chaos: *link*

Chaos: The Joker escaped from Arkham again, but no one’s heard anything of him since, nor have they been able to find him

TooFine: @Daniel 👀

TooFine: ok the @ had been a joke but the fact that he has read it and not replied is concerning

Sharpshooter: @Daniel, what did you do?

Sharpshooter: @Daniel

Sharpshooter: I can see that you’re reading this, don’t ignore me.

TooFine: ohhhh someones in troubleee 👀

Sharpshooter: Tucker.

TooFine: 🤐

---

Danny takes a deep breath.

Well, it’s now or never. Let’s hope Jazz is feeling merciful.

---

Private chat

Bill: ok so you know how you said you would still love me if I was a worm?

Pants: I have no clue how this ties into the previous conversation, but yes. Why?

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: would you also still love me if I

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: accidentally

Bill: vibe checked someone that tried to uh

Bill: hypothetically

Bill: kidnap and or kill me??

Bill: 🥺🥺🙏

Pants: Danny, did you accidentally kill the Joker?

Bill: yes or no Jazz??!? 😩🥺

Pants: Yes, Danny. I would still love you if you, hypothetically, accidentally killed the Joker.

Bill: this is why you’re my favorite sister 🥹🥰😘

Bill: don’t tell Ellie 😳🫣

Pants: Danny, what happened?

---

Danny lets out a sigh of relief before proceeding to tell Jazz what happened.

---

Pants: Oh Danny.

Bill: are you mad at me?

Pants: I’m not mad at you, I just want you to stay safe.

Pants: While I don’t condone murder, I understand that it was self-defense and an accident. I‘m just glad that you’re alright.

Bill: 🥰💞😘

---

With a small smile on his face, Danny goes back to the groupchat.

---

Team Phantom 👻😎

Daniel: you know

Daniel: if I had a nickel for every time I’ve had to fight off an insane clown that attacked me 🤡

Daniel: I’d have two nickels

Daniel: which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it’s happened twice, right? 🤔

Chaos: Damnit Danny, we leave you alone in a new city for a week and you already manage to get into a fight with one of Gotham City’s most infamous rogues

TooFine: actually its been 6 days 10 hours and 17 minutes

TooFine: so not even a full week yet

Chaos: Did you at least get a good few punches in?

Chaos: Danny?

TooFine: @Daniel ???

TooFine: if i had a nickel for every time danny said something concerning and then didnt provide context id be richer than vlad

Daniel: anyway, for completely unrelated reasons, @TooFine I need you to wipe some cams for me 😃

TooFine: danny im not wiping the cams again so no one will have proof of you tripping backward and falling ass-first into a trashcan

Chaos: Speaking of, Tucker do you still have that footage and can you send it to me?

TooFine: already done

Daniel: noo it’s nothing like that this time 😫

Daniel: pleaseeee 🥺🙏🙏

Daniel: I’ll get you an autograph from Tim Drake-Wayne?

TooFine: deal.

Daniel: 🥳🎉

Daniel: ok so the footage from somewhere around 3 am last night

Daniel: around some place named park row??

Daniel: I think it’s called?? 🤔

Daniel: though I’m pretty sure I’ve also heard some people refer to it as crime alley

Daniel: not sure why tho 🤷

TooTine: aye aye captain o7

Chaos: Danny, in an alley getting attacked by the fucking Joker: I wonder why this place is called crime alley

Daniel: stop bullying me 😠

Chaos: No

TooFine: hey danny r u sure thats right? i checked the cams n stuff but theres no available footage from the area n time u described

TooFine: its like someones already wiped it all

Daniel: oh!

Daniel: that’s so sweet of him  😊

Chaos: Wait who is this ‘him’?

TooFine: the joker????

Daniel: oh no not the Joker

Daniel: just some cute guy I met last night  

Daniel: he witnessed me killing the Joker 🫣

Daniel: and didn’t call the cops on me afterward 🥰💞

TooFine: def green flag

Chaos: Oh hell yeah, he’s a keeper

Chaos: Wait you killed the Joker?! I thought you just fought him off!

Daniel: it was an accident!! 😭😭

Daniel: he crept up on me and tried to grab me 😓

Daniel: so I got startled and because all I saw was a clown

Daniel: I just kinda punched his face in with my ghost strength… 😰

TooFine: f

Chaos: f

Sharpshooter: Have you gotten rid of the body yet? Did you leave behind DNA at the crime scene? Will I need to start saving up bail money or getting ready to enact the Fenton Break Out plan?

Chaos: Jazz asking the important questions here

Daniel: well, considering the footage was wiped

Daniel: and also the fact that no one’s found him yet

Daniel: I think it’s safe to assume it’s all taken care of

Daniel: that’s honestly really sweet of him though 🥰😊

TooFine: oohhhhh ur mystery boo??

Daniel: yeah, this random guy saw me vibe-checking the Joker

Daniel: and let me go home without any trouble

Daniel: pretty sure he’s the one who wiped the cams 🤔

Daniel: and then today he showed up at my apartment with flowers 🥺

Daniel: they were sweat peas!!!! 🥰🤩

Chaos: Was that to thank you for the murder orrrr?

Sharpshooter: Oh those are your favorite, was that on purpose?

Daniel: well I didn’t tell him

Daniel: so I’m not sure if he knew or if it was a coincidence 🤷

Daniel: but yeah then he took me out to this restaurant called Pete’s for dinner

Daniel: they had some amazing cannoli

Daniel: you should try it sometime if you get the chance

Daniel: and then after dinner he took me to the observatory!!!!!!! 🤩🥰

Sharpshooter: Gotham observatory?

Sharpshooter: Isn’t that the one with the special telescope, I think you mentioned it before

Daniel: yeah, the crystal-powered telescope!! 😍💞✨🤩❤️

Daniel: and at the end, he brought me home

Daniel: and he asked for my number!!!

TooFine: nice dude!

Chaos: The guy really went all-out and planned your dream date hu? So, what’s this mystery hunk’s name?

Daniel: oh I’m not sure, I didn’t ask 🙃🤭

Sharpshooter: Danny…

Daniel: yes?

Sharpshooter: Did you go on a date with a complete stranger who witnessed you commit a murder?

Chaos: How do you not even know his name?

Daniel: two words Jazz: Johnny 13

Daniel: and he’s not a stranger!! 😠

Sharpshooter: But you don’t know his name?

Chaos: We just can’t leave him alone, can we? Less than a week on his own and he already murdered one of Gotham’s most infamous rogues and then completely forgets the concept of Stranger Danger

Daniel: I mean he probably just found it when he tried to do some research on me or something

Daniel: probably got it from the school’s system now that I think of it 🤔

TooFine: dude who the hell is this guy??

Chaos: Who the fuck did you go on a date with?

Daniel: do you really think it was a date? 🥺😳

Daniel: I wasn’t sure

Daniel: cause he mainly took me out for dinner to thank me for the night before

Daniel: but then again

Daniel: he did get me flowers and ask for my number after he brought me back to my apartment 🤔

Daniel: like I wasn’t sure if I was reading the signals right…..

Daniel: but do you think that was a date? 🫣

Sharpshooter: Danny, for the love of the Ancients.

Sharpshooter: Who was it?

Daniel: oh, it was Red Hood 🥰

TooFine: damn dannys got that vigilante rizz

Sharpshooter: Red Hood? The crime lord?!

TooFine: former, actually

Daniel: what he said ^^

Chaos: Danny, you really have a type huh? Vigilantes with a Red theme. Who’s next? Red Robin?

Daniel: stop bullying me

TooFine: never

Chaos: Never

Daniel: on a different note, who changed my name in the chat again?

Sharpshooter: Ellie did.

Chaos: Ellie

TooFine: @TheCoolerDaniel

TheCoolerDaniel: 😎

TheCoolerDaniel: wait i just read back, danny’s dating a crime lord?? :0 👀

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Taglist (for now, I’ll probably stop if I cant keep up):

@i-always-say-yea  @uraniumwizard