#okay so it's may week in poland (how i should call it?)

[marauderswolf22]

oh god im in the phase when im something between "i want to cry because of fictional or non fictiontal but not touching me things that makes my heart melts" and "i want to write something where my fav fictional character cry over those things"

[poutyniall]

Babes have you thought about working in a library? I know you love books and that it might not be what you want to do but the things happening to you at work are truly horrible and I'm so sorry it's happening to you

and don't let anyone tell you that you should feel different about it

I don't know if you have the same thing in your country but here in Poland every school has their own library and sometimes they look for new and young people to work there

It's also a school setting so if something like filming at work happens it can be easily taken care of if not by the school itself then by the higher-ups (like the government people who manage schooling idk what it's called in English)

Again hope you stay strong in this situation and that you find a way out of this toxic situation

💜 your anon from poland

Hello love, let me apologize for the late response first. I'm sorry!

I honestly have no idea how it works here but I'd love to work in a library.

I'm sorry, I feel a bit off. Basically my boss kicked me out (I told him I'd work until December 31st but still, the way he did it) just because I demand to be treated with respect and that the boundaries I've set are respected as well. He can't stand the fact I won't let him overpower me and he told me I'm rude, a fake and sly person. He said I'm worst than that woman who got fired. A woman he defined as unbalanced, mentally ill and who created an infinite number of problems for him. And you know, it would have been okay if he'd scolded me at work for some mistake I made, but I have never caused any problem on that front and no matter how angry I may have been - and I was and I'm also a bitch and I can be mean with words - I never dared to insult him or offend his person. He also said, after he kicked me out, that I created a problem for him for these Christmas holidays because now there is no promoter in the bookshop, And to add insult to injury he asked me to train a new person. Like, are you fucking serious you fucking fuck? I really have no words. This happened a week ago today and I've been feeling, pissed of course, but also...

I don't know, maybe I'm the problem.

[kiri-ah]

Something To Sink My Teeth Into || he/him pronouns version

Themes: Supernatural AU, Vampire AU, strangers to lovers, angst and fluff (so much fluff), something similar to those symbiotes from Venom and Hanahaki disease combined, interplanar travel, Jaemin and the reader are oblivious and Chenle gets mad about it, long conversations about vampires, vampires can't cry

Pairing: Vampire!Jaemin x Male Human!reader

Warnings: mentions of blood (minor), mentions of eating (human food and vampire food), character death, Chenle is kind of a butthole, in depth conversations about humans and vampires which include biting and blood drinking, Yuta's house gets set on fire

Word Count: 26.4k

Summary: A trip to Poland goes terribly wrong - or maybe terribly right - when you're bitten and kidnapped by a vampire. Between passing out, almost dying multiple times, and falling in love, you have a lot on your plate. Oh, and the magic. Right. Teaser here.

A/N: Okay so uh... this wasn't meant to be this long. I hate my brain sometimes. *sigh*

This has only been edited by myself and a friend of mine, please excuse any errors. I worked hard to make the best experience possible. For that reason, please note that this is the !he/him pronouns version! They/them pronouns may be found here, she/her pronouns here. Please enjoy!

You were on holiday in Krakow, Poland. For your twenty first birthday, your parents had gifted you a weeklong trip over Spring Break, and you had been having the time of your life. You had found Krakow rich in historical influence - it had been the capital of Poland until 1596 and still had remnants of the past, like a Renaissance-era trading post and sections of the medieval walls that surrounded the city. Plus, the section of the city that you were staying in was very close to the city center, where you discovered aforementioned trading post, called the Cloth Hall, and an old cathedral named St. Mary’s Basilica.

The first night of your stay, Sunday night, you had struggled to sleep, because of the time difference and the excitement of arriving. You stayed in Monday morning, trying to at least rest a bit, and then ventured out to the nearest coffee shop when that didn’t alleviate your sleepiness. The barista had whipped up your favorite pick-me-up morning drink, and you went to sit outside in the fresh air, surveying the plaza over the rim of your cup. It was just the right time of year, you thought, because it was nice and warm without being too hot, just how you liked it. The sun had started to rise about the buildings around you, illuminating certain structures and giving them an unearthly glow.

When you finished your drink, you put the cup into the collection bin and walked back out onto the main square, just enjoying the sun on your face (over the sunglasses you had bought in the airport after forgetting to pack yours) and letting the warmth sink through your limbs after the tired night. One of the unfortunate things about the time of year you had travelled was the tourists. There were families and older couples and people your age taking trips with their friends, and most everyone stayed right where you were staying as well: right in the heart of the city. To avoid as many crowds as possible, you had booked a tour of St. Mary’s Basilica for Thursday morning, and reserved entry to the underground museum for this afternoon.

Tomorrow you planned to go and see Grodzka Street, where you were going to try and find a souvenir. In the same neighborhood was an ancient church called St. Andrew’s Church, which dated back to around 1079. On Wednesday, you were going to brave the crowds of people in the Cloth Hall for the same purpose, and also because it was a historical landmark that you just needed to explore. Wednesday afternoon was blocked out to be a rest period, as was Thursday morning. Then on Friday you were planning to go and see the Wawel Castle and Cathedral. From there you would explore the various attractions on the property, and then return to the plaza later to eat. That afternoon, you planned to go to the Jewish cemetery. Saturday was blocked out for a trip to Auschwitz-Birkenau, which was a Nazi concentration camp and a Holocaust memorial out of the main town. When you returned to the hotel late that afternoon you would pack and get ready for your flight Sunday morning. It was going to be a very full and very fun week. Or at least you hoped it would be fun.

You explored the main square a little bit that first day and unpacked your things, making sure you had everything you needed for your trip and you didn’t need to walk to one of the convenience stores nearby.

The days passed quickly, and you finished each one completely satisfied. Everything and everyone here was so wonderful and you started to wonder how you had never heard of this place before this trip. It was absolutely one of the best places your parents could have picked.

On Friday morning you got up bright and early (well, actually, it was dark and early) to go to the Wawel Castle. You had heard from a travelling site that tickets sold out fast and it was important to get there early in the day, and you tried to heed that warning. At 7am when you arrived it was already busy, but thankfully not so much that the lines were too long. You wandered through the small exhibits and around the grounds. It was a bit more chilly today and you wrapped a scarf around your neck as you shivered, trying to find a less windy spot to hide out for a second. You found a little spot where you could take a moment and recharge your inner heater and were doing just that, burrowing into your small scarf mountain, when you realized that a person stood next to you. You looked up through your lashes at them and caught your breath - holy cow he had good genes. He had a sharp, sloping jawline that stopped at a chin less pointy than you had expected. His lips were plush and round, although he needed some chapstick. His hair was pushed around by the wind but despite that he looked, well, amazing. Sections were bleached, giving his hair an almost halo-esque look. His nostrils contracted as he inhaled and then his eyes cut down to yours, dark and deep and was that eyeliner?

He smiled then, a smirk that seemed far too self-assured for the situation, and leaned over towards your exposed ear. “I can feel you staring, baby,” he murmured. The top of your ear, which had been feeling rather numb, flamed hot at his words. It almost hurt, the sudden jump into heat. You turned towards him fully, only eyes exposed by the scarf mountain. Your hair whipped around as the wind shifted again, but he didn’t seem cold, although he was in only a pair of black skinny jeans, a white t-shirt, and a black jacket. The jacket caught your attention for a second - it was studded with thousands of little rhinestones, like a varsity jacket gone shiny. Then he shifted closer into your space and you were forced to look back at his eyes, glittering in a way that seemed almost predatory. You sucked in a breath through your mouth and started to back away.

“S-sorry,” your breath came out in a whisper. Nobody seemed to notice your interaction. “I didn’t see you there, I’ll just leave.” You turned to go before his hand, surprisingly strong, clamped around your arm and pulled you back into his chest.

His voice came out in a growl as he blocked your scream with his other hand. “I am far, far too hungry for you to leave right now, precious.” The strength in your legs seemed to dissipate at his tone, you knew you needed to defend yourself, but ‘hungry’? What was that about? And precious? The hand wrapped around your arm let go and started unwrapping your scarf, exposing your face to both him and the frigid wind. He started to lean down, and you pressed your lips together tightly. At the very least, he wasn’t getting in your mouth. You may have lost the strength in your legs, but not in your will. Then he bypassed your mouth and leaned into your neck, inhaling and causing cold air to course along the column of your throat. He chuckled when you shivered, then bit into your neck.

The pain was overwhelming, you could feel each individual blood cell crying out, every organ protesting, your head started to pound with it. It hurt far more than even a dog bite should. It hurt like a shot at the doctor going on and on, echoing through your body and you were powerless to stop it. The pain flared in your neck and your brain seemed to slow down as the blood flowed away from it and into his mouth. You crumbled into him, and without detaching from your throat, he scooped you up into his arms, holding you there to be his personal bloodbag. You had long since stopped trying to scream, it was too difficult, too much effort.

Vampires, your thoughts whispered, before the pain covered you and you passed out, collapsing completely.

☽༓☾

You woke up in a... cozy cottage? There wasn’t any sign of your attacker and, in fact, no sign of anything vampire esque either. You looked around the single room at the soft fabric couch (covered in boho style throw pillows), the kitchenette (complete with pre packed food), and the window, through which you could see a combination flower and vegetable garden. There were two doors off of the room you were in, one that led towards the lush green outside, and one that must have concealed the bathroom.

The moment you realized this, you also realized that you really needed to use said bathroom, and struggled to plant your bare feet on the floor. Your legs didn't want to hold your weight, and you crumbled to the rug with a whine. Two seconds later, the door to the outside opened with a swish of fresh air and there, outlined by the sun, stood the most gorgeous person you had ever had the pleasure to lay eyes on. When he saw you on the floor, he groaned and ran a hand through his pink hair. "Shit, I'm so sorry, let me help you!" He ran over and you allowed him to half carry you into the bathroom. It wasn’t like you had any strength to protest, and he seemed nice. He smelled like sunshine on fresh earth.

Once you had finished using the toilet you tried to stand up again, now that you at least had some semblance of strength in your legs. After a few tries you were able to support yourself against the bathroom counter, with more than half of your weight against the frigid tiles. Your legs shook as you started standing more straight up, and you made a high pitched keening sound that you didn’t even know you could make; the man’s worried voice came through the door. His voice was higher and slightly panicked.

“Are you okay? Do you need help? Are you hurting too much?”

Your voice, which you hadn’t managed to make work properly, came out lower than usual and scratchy. A portion of your throat ached as you tried to make the sounds audibly. “Yeah,” you rasped out. “I can’t stand up properly.”

“Do you need me to come and help?” There was something about his voice that just made you want to trust him. It was soft but strong and even though he had toned down the panic, it still had soft tremors of worry running through it.

You thought about it for a second and considered yourself in the mirror. You looked, quite frankly, horrible. Your hair was a mess (more than usual), your eye bags were sagging unnaturally, and your eyes themselves were dull. You did look like you needed help. You sighed. “Sure.”

A moment later he opened the door slowly and stepped into the space with you, putting one arm around your waist to help support you. You relaxed some of your weight onto him and closed your eyes briefly. It would have been a wholly relaxing moment if not for your stomach. It grumbled up at you and you thought for a moment that it sounded like an angry octopus trapped inside of you. Then you blinked to clear the thought away as the man laughed. It was deeper than you expected from a man with pink cotton-candy colored hair, a low chuckle that rumbled through his body and, in turn, yours. You shook against him slightly with the movement and his other arm came to help you lean more against his body. He was stronger than you expected and you could feel the muscles in his arms shift as he reoriented himself.

“Let’s get you some food,” he said, smiling. “Unfortunately I’m not sure I’ll have much you’ll like.” You just nodded. Your throat was still throbbing uncomfortably where you were bitten and you weren’t sure you had the energy to even debate his statement. You were sure you would eat whatever he gave you. He led you into the main room again and helped you settle onto the couch. He walked over to the kitchenette and picked up a can of soup, then walked back to you to verify it was a kind that you liked. Once you had approved it, he went back and put it in a pot on the electric stove, starting to heat it up. As he stood over it, you had some time to think as you sat on the couch. The first thing you realized was that you still didn’t know what his name was, which was an issue. You couldn’t thank him properly without knowing his name. The second thing you realized was that you didn’t know where you were, exactly. The third was that you had probably missed your flight back home and your parents were going to murder you for it when you eventually got back. You shifted so you were more comfortable before trying to speak again. You started with the easiest vocal warmup you remembered and the man looked over at you with eyebrows raised.

“You good?” he asked. You nodded in response, hoping that your throat would relax and stop throbbing.

“Yeah, I think so,” you told him. “The side of my neck really aches where that man bit me.” His eyebrows furrowed at this and you thought maybe you just imagined it, that nobody actually bit you, but the pain was real enough in that moment and it was certainly real enough when he bit you. “Also,” you continued, “I still don’t know what your name is.” He seemed to think about this for a moment.

“I’m Jaemin Na,” he said eventually. “This is my house. And I think maybe we need to take a closer look at your bite, I didn’t realize it still hurt. Usually the throbbing goes away after a day or two.” You found yourself nodding along before his words sank in.

“Okay, uh, nice to actually know who you are now. I’m Y/N,” you said. There were suddenly many more questions floating around your brain. Usually he had said, which meant he had dealt with vampire bitten people before. How? Was he one? Why weren’t you a vampire? And how long had you been asleep for? They circled around your head like a dog chasing its tail until you realized that Jaemin was in front of you. It seemed like he was waiting for you to say something.

“Sorry,” you murmured. “What was that?”

“I said we have all the time in the world for you to ask me the questions I know you must have. Don’t psych yourself out. You’re safe.” Despite the fact that you knew next to nothing about him you found yourself once again trusting him without reason. He just seemed like a genuinely nice person, someone you could believe to tell you nothing but the truth.

“Okay,” you agreed, and it came out like a sigh. Your throat gave a particularly unpleasant throb and you unconsciously brought a hand up to rub at it. Jaemin’s hand fastened around your wrist and pulled it away, looking closely at your skin. He sighed.

“You’ve probably figured out by now that the man who bit you was a vampire. If you haven’t, have your moment of denial now.” You just looked back at him, surprised.

“Denial?”

“Yeah. Usually when humans find out about vampires for the first time they aren’t very accepting of it. I’ve had to replace my windows a few times from thrown objects.” You almost laughed before realizing that he was serious.

“Okay, well, I already got that, so go ahead,” you prompted.

“Great!” His eyes got just a little bit less heavy with your statement and he continued, “contrary to popular belief, vampires don’t actually turn humans all that often. If we had that little self control the whole population would be dead or turned already.” You noted his use of the word we and shuddered a little. He could attack you too? He seemed so gentle.

For the first time you noticed your soup in a bowl on the coffee table. Jaemin reclaimed your attention by speaking again. “We’re also pretty good at choosing who to bite, and when. We’re not heartless. We try to choose people with good metabolisms so that we can return them to Earth quickly.” At this you inhaled so sharply that he paused, looking over at you.

“We aren’t on Earth anymore?” you asked shakily. He shook his head with a quirk of his lips. That distracted you enough to calm down for a moment. He really was a gorgeous person. Was the word person still applicable to vampires? You didn’t know. He sucked you out of your thoughts again with a hand waved in front of you.

“No, we’re not on Earth. Where we are… it’s like a parallel plane of existence. Vampires can live here, do live here, in bigger bunches than we can on Earth. We call it ‘Vahmpyr.’ I always thought that was a really unoriginal name, but I was turned after it was discovered so I didn’t have much of a say. It would be like you trying to rename Earth.” He picked up your bowl of soup and stirred it around, handing it to you, before continuing.

“This is my vacation house of sorts, where I nurse humans who have been bitten back to their healthy selves. Generally we vampires try to keep one certified nurse or doctor in each coven just in case, more if the coven is large. It’s a handy skill to have. Especially if you happen to have parts of your coven who are as chaotic as ours.” He looked over at you and smiled wryly before adding, “I didn’t poison the soup, you know.” You looked down at your lap where the warm bowl sat and laughed under your breath before picking up the spoon and taking a bite. It was delicious. You flashed him a thumbs up with your mouth full and he smiled brightly again.

Once you had swallowed you asked, “how can you bite humans and not turn them? I didn’t know it was possible to not turn us.” He nodded like he was expecting this question.

“It’s kind of a strange feeling,” he told you. “Biting, I mean. It’s not like the human feeling of biting into a piece of meat. It’s just… it’s amazing. It’s like cold fruit on a summer’s day, hot chocolate while snow falls. It’s at once a feeling of absolute power and absolute devotion because tasting a human’s blood puts them above everything else, at least for a few moments. At the same time you’re aware that their body is falling apart and right into you. It’s intoxicating. Every once in a while you’ll bite someone that just tastes extraordinarily good, or meet someone with a unique and, pardon my language, delicious, smell. Then your body sort of automatically realizes you want them to stick around and releases the venom.”

“So,” you said, interested by his version of vampires, “if you bit me right now, I’d be fine?”

His eyes sparked with something new. Anger, you thought, or something close to it. “I just spent four days nursing you back to health and you want me to bite you just to see what happens?” he asked incredulously.

“No! I was just confirming. I’m sorry,” you murmured, and shoved another bite of the soup into your mouth for good measure. He sighed.

“I’m sorry too, it feels so easy to talk to you. I forget that you’re new to this.” You choked on your soup while he and he hurriedly patted your back as you regained your breath. “Are you alright?”

“Did you say you spent four days nursing me back to health?” you asked, head spinning. Four days. Four days. Four days. “I’ve been missing from Earth for four days?”

He deliberated for a moment. “Yes, and no. You’ve been off of Earth for four days, yes, but you aren’t missing.” You raised an eyebrow in response and he hurried to explain more. “I mean, obviously you’re here, and yes, you’ve been here for four days, asleep, recovering from Jisung’s bite. On the other hand, there’s still a you on Earth right now. That’s the interesting thing about Vahmpyr. We can bring humans back, with some effort, and while they’re here, a version of them is still on Earth. It’s still you. And if you go back, from what I understand, you get your other half’s memories back, like you never left. It’s quite the phenomenon.” He seemed completely serious and you were inclined to believe him, but this was insanity. Another you, a perfect copy, walking around on Earth while you hung out with the vampires in their parallel plane? You pinched yourself. It hurt, and you winced. Jaemin looked at you with this horrible understanding glimmer in his eyes like he was saying I know how this is. It’s weird and unimaginable but it’s here. Please don’t break any of my things.

Eventually you just kept sitting and looked back at him. “This really is good soup,” you said. He looked at you in surprise before bursting out laughing, face lighting up like the horizon at sunrise.

“You’re not going to attack me?” he asked between chuckles. “That’s the normal response. And thank you, that’s my favorite kind of soup too.” You shook your head, smiling back at him.

“I decided that there’s no changing it even if this is just a fever dream induced by an infected human,” you explained to him. “And wait, can you actually eat still? Like stuff besides blood?” In response he ran over to the small kitchen and grabbed a spoon of his own, dipping it into the bowl and moving it to his mouth. When he was done he smiled at you.

“I can still eat human foods. Nothing is as good as blood, of course, but I can still enjoy it. It’s just dulled by the transformation. And I’m glad that’s the stance you take on being transported to a different plane, I’ve known humans to react rather badly.” He took a moment to think. “For example, there was a woman who was convinced we had sexually assaulted her, which is a fair thought, but she wouldn’t let me explain anything to her. She ran outside as soon as her legs were strong enough and ran right into Lucas. He’s a really big guy, wide and tall and strong and such. She was so terrified she ran into my bathroom and I had to give her the spiel from through the door. Not the finest of interactions.” In spite of yourself you laughed. You could imagine the woman’s fear, especially if this Lucas was as infuriatingly gorgeous as Jaemin and the man who had bit you. You probably should’ve felt the same way, but something about Jaemin was just relaxing, and you felt safe with him.

“I get it,” you told Jaemin. “All of you guys; the guy who bit me - what did you say his name was? Jisung? Yeah, him. Jisung and you and probably Lucas, you all look like models which I guess goes with the vampire narrative, but it’s a little shocking since I’ve never seen someone so good looking. It’s nearly scary.” You looked back up to see Jaemin looking surprised.

“You think we’re good looking? Even after you got bitten by one, abducted by another, and have only heard of the third in a story about someone running away screaming?”

You shrugged. “All of that doesn’t change the facts. You’re still some pretty perfect looking human beings.” A moment later you realized what you had said and wrinkled your nose. “Sorry, uh, creatures. Is that offensive?” Jaemin laughed again and wow you could get addicted to that laugh. It was so carefree. You supposed that came with immortality.

“Technically ‘creatures’ is more accurate but isn’t very nice-sounding, even if we are unnatural monsters.” He said this as though he had come to terms with it. Even if we are unnatural monsters.

“I don’t think you’re unnatural,” you told him. “I mean, if there is a higher power out there then He or It or They created a whole plane for you and if not then nature did. I don’t think Vahmpyr would exist if you were unnatural.” He looked at you without speaking as you took another spoonful of soup.

“That’s… that’s a new way of looking at it.” He looked conflicted, like he was trying to reconcile your view of him with his view of himself. “I don’t think our plane was meant to exist though, by higher power or nature. Humans are beautiful because they age and there is room for change within your society. It’s hard to change an entire plane full of the unchanging.”

“Maybe so,” you argued, “but you’re obviously gorgeous on the outside, and on the inside it seems like you have a good system too. If I was a vampire I don’t think I’d take care of the humans I had bitten. It wouldn’t have occurred to me. They would all die. I would be dead, come to think of it.”

“That’s true,” he conceded. “You really do have a unique view of things.”

“Thank you?” It came out sounding more like a question than you intended. You finished your bowl of soup, licking the excess off of your upper lip. Setting the bowl back down seemed to break whatever spell had kept you in eager conversation with him. You supposed all of your questions had been answered, for now. Jaemin helped you get set up with Netflix on his TV and went back outside to his garden. He explained that you could call for him through the open window if you needed him, he would be right nearby. You nodded, already distracted by the opening scene of your show.

After a while you realized that there were low voices coming from outside. It sounded like Jaemin was talking to someone. You turned the volume down on the TV a little bit to listen. Maybe you could meet the infamous Lucas or someone else in Jaemin’s vampire family.

“... have to bring him to me?” Jaemin was saying. “You tasted him, you know his scent. This is painful. His scent is all over my things, my bed.” He let out a small groan and the other man with him chuckled breathily.

“Hyung, I didn’t mean for him to smell so good I swear, it was a spur of the moment decision. I was hunting in his area and his scent was so enticing. Plus, I was hungry!” You shuddered at the mention of hunting. This one, who must be Jisung, was far less civilized than Jaemin, it seemed.

Jaemin made an angry noise and his words hissed out when he spoke. “You think it was enticing out in the open air of Poland? On a windy day? I’ve been smelling him acutely on my things, in my house, for four days and it hurts. My venom has been going non-stop for the entire period and it’s not like I can just change him, he’s got a life ahead of him!” Part of your heart went out to Jaemin - he was trying so hard to take care of you and even caused himself pain for it. That explained why he had reacted so negatively when you asked what would happen if he bit you. You wouldn’t have been fine. You would’ve become like him. The thought didn’t cause the anger or disgust you thought it should have. It sounded nice, almost, to be like him. To stay in his safety for eternity.

“Jaemin,” said a new voice. It was strong and rough like tree bark lined his throat. “You can return him back to the real world in just a few more days and you’ll be free of him. It’s not like he’d want to stay here anyway, his friends and family are back on Earth. We can keep Jisung home and have him feed on Chenle until he learns his lesson.”

Someone, presumably Jisung, made a wounded noise. “I can control myself, I promise. Don’t make me feed on Chenle, Hyung, he doesn’t taste anywhere near as good.” Definitely Jisung.

“Jisung,” said Jaemin’s voice. “Don’t argue, you brought this on yourself. And me,” he adds as an afterthought.

Jisung’s sullen voice responded, “fine, Hyung, but Chenle isn’t going to be happy either, you know.” You thought maybe Jaemin must have nodded or something because nobody said anything for a while. You turned off the TV, suddenly bored with the program and head full of new questions. The top one on the list was why. Why did you affect them this way? Why did Jaemin treat you so nicely when you were hurting him? Why did Jisung sound like a puppy who had been reprimanded? Why did Jaemin and the other man have the power to ground him, essentially? Then there were the who questions. Who was the man with the voice like tree bark? Who was Chenle, and why wouldn’t he be happy? Lastly were the when questions. When would you be going home? When would you see them again? Would you see them ever again? When would Jisung be allowed to hunt again?

You were so deep in your head that you didn’t notice the door opening and Jaemin coming in, two men behind him, until he stopped and waved a hand in front of you.

“Y/N, you okay? I brought you some people to meet.” He stepped back and you forced your eyes to refocus on what was in front of you. When you looked up at him, he presented the two other guys like he was a car salesman and these were his favorite models. “This is Jisung, you’ve met him already although I don’t know if you remember him.” You nodded, looking over him. He had on a grey crewneck sweatshirt over a pair of black sweatpants today and looked far less terrifyingly beautiful flanked by his hyungs.

“I remember him,” you told them. “You’re the one who bit me.” You didn’t think it was possible for him to look more sheepish than he already did but he managed to, and shrank back so that he was standing half-behind the other man. The other guy had bleached hair falling messily over his forehead, and even though he was shorter than Jisung, he seemed to command your attention more. He had on a green sleeveless shirt that showed off arms rippling with muscles. You gulped, looking up at him, but then he smiled at you. His whole demeanor changed. He felt less like he was about to kill you and more like he might accidentally strangle you to death in a hug. His eyes scrunched up into little crescents and you found yourself smiling back.

“I’m Jeno,” he said, walking forward to shake your hand. “Sorry I didn’t come to visit earlier.” His voice still sounded like bark lined his throat, but less so now that he wasn’t bothering to limit his volume.

“That’s fine,” you replied. “I just woke up earlier today.” You glanced towards Jaemin; he looked like a proud mom watching you interact with his friend. “Jaemin fed me, and since then I’ve just been sitting here watching TV. I can’t find my phone, and even if I did I’m not sure I could walk over to it. My legs are out of practice.”

Jeno smiled again. “That’s pretty common for Jisung’s victims. We found out he has these little back teeth that make it more painful for the people he bites so they usually need more bed rest to recover from the strain on their bodies and the blood loss.”

You nodded, as though that made sense. They still let Jisung hunt with his unpredictability and extra teeth? That seemed a little irresponsible of them, but you supposed that Jeno and Jaemin weren’t that much older than him in the first place. You tried to bring up your next subject subtly.

“Speaking of recovery, when do you think I’ll be going back to Earth?” The change in the room was immediate. Jeno’s smile faltered enough for you to see his eyes, Jaemin’s shoulders slumped, and Jisung’s foot started tapping against the rug. “It’s not that I don’t like it here,” you interjected, “I'm just worried that my, uh, double self will get up to trouble and stuff. What if someone notices it’s not me?”

Jisung looked at Jaemin. “You either did a really bad job of explaining this or he wasn't listening, Hyung.” Jaemin glared at him in response and chose not to dignify the statement with an answer. Jisung huffed at him and turned to you. “It’s you, y’know, back on Earth. Like… when a starfish gets cut in half, both halves grow into full starfish again. Something similar happened to you. Same organism, same guy, just two different places. Is that a weird comparison?”

“What he means,” interjected Jeno before you could reply, “is that the you down there has all of your experiences and memories and the same brain. It’s the exact same person as you, just two versions of you. When you go back you won't even have a bite scar.” At this you lifted your hand to rub at the mark on your throat. You saw Jisung’s eyes follow the action and he licked his lips. You put your arm back down into your lap and swallowed, the sound echoing in your head.

Finally Jaemin spoke. “And to answer your question, as soon as we get you strong enough to walk on your own you can go back. I mean technically there’s a body waiting for you down there, but we don’t know what would happen if we sent you back faulty, so we like to be careful.” You laughed at his use of the word faulty and nodded.

“Okay. Do you guys have a portal or something that’ll take me back?” At this all three men burst into laughter and a high pitched squeal joined the mix, coming from the doorway. Yet another man was standing there, thin orange-dyed hair flopping as he doubled over laughing.

“A- a portal,” he wheezed out between laughs. “No, we don’t have a portal.” You threw him a disgruntled look.

“I was just asking…”

Jaemin looked equally off-put and said, “Y/N, this is Chenle, Jisung’s best friend and our second child. Sorry about his lack of a filter.” His lips pursed unhappily and you rushed to reassure him.

“No, that’s okay, I don’t know if that was stupid question. No feelings hurt, he’s fine.” Jaemin looked unconvinced, so you sat up more towards Chenle and reached out a hand. “I’m Y/N.”

“Oh is that your name?” he replied breezily, shaking your hand quickly. “They were right, you do smell good.” Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Jaemin shift protectively.

“Chenle.” His voice came out a growl, raising hairs on the back of your neck. “Don’t you dare.” It was interesting, you thought, how this dynamic worked. From what you had heard with Jisung, Jaemin had always contained himself, like he was reprimanding his favorite child. With Chenle he seemed almost dangerous, like it was possible for him to hurt a fly, and things much bigger than a fly. You wondered if he was this way with all of his patients, or if Chenle just bothered him more with you than usual.

“I’m not going to, mom, chill out a moment.” Chenle, you decided, must be the bad egg of their group. Every family had at least one, and here was theirs. He seemed the most likely to hurt something for the fun of it, and it almost seemed like he should have been the one to attack you, not Jisung. You wondered, in the distant back of your head, whether he had extra teeth for biting like Jisung did. Maybe it was better not to find out.

“Please don’t call me mom,” Jaemin sighed in response, all of the fight leaving him a rush. His muscles were still tense, though, and he ran a hand through his cotton candy colored hair.

“Chenle,” said Jeno, “I think you and Jisung should go talk. He has news for you.” Jisung shuddered slightly, his nod small and tense. You remembered his reaction earlier, when he had been informed that he needed to feed from Chenle for the time being. Chenle looked between Jisung and Jeno and an expression appeared on his face that didn’t seem natural on him - uncomfortable confusion. What you had seen in this past tension filled minute was that he was self assured and rambunctious. Now you wondered if he respected Jeno, regardless of that. You supposed you didn’t really have time to find out, you would be going home as soon as you could walk on your own. Speaking of which-

“I need to use the bathroom again,” you said as Jisung walked out of the house with Chenle right behind him.

“You should try getting up on your own,” Jeno suggested. “The more you sit around the harder it’ll be for your legs to get strong again.” You nodded and used the arm of the couch to haul yourself to your feet. Your knees started shaking again and Jaemin hurried to support you a little, until you felt a little more steady on your feet. Once you did, you tentatively took a tiny step towards the bathroom. Your arms flew out to your sides to help with balance and Jaemin took the mother bird stance, worriedly standing within arm’s length to catch you if you started to collapse. Jeno watched from a few paces away and smiled at you.

“Let’s see if you can get to me, okay? Then we can help if you need support.” You nodded and gritted your teeth, shuffling forward on your weak legs slowly. The good news: you made it to him without falling or using Jaemin’s ever-there assistance. The not so good news: you practically fell into Jeno when you got to him, using his body for support. He helped you find your center of gravity again before acting as a crutch to get you to the bathroom.

“If you need anything,” Jaemin told you, “I’ll be right out here. Don’t over-exert yourself.”

“I’ll be fine, it’s just like one step to the toilet, and there’s a nice strong counter” you assured him, and closed the door behind you as you stepped away from Jeno’s warm strength. Immediately you felt weak again but you reached out to hold on to the edge of the counter while you walked and got safely to the toilet. Your legs screeched at you as you lowered yourself onto the seat and you relaxed a little bit once you were seated. Recovery was going to be hard.

☽༓☾

Two days passed in a blur of pain and people. You met quite a few new people, like the infamous Lucas (who was a giant baby and who adored you), a woman named Joy who had actual red eyes like the legends said, and a man that everyone called Ten. Actually, you weren’t sure if Ten counted as a man. He dropped by Jaemin’s house the third day, right after Jisung and Chenle had just left after getting some flowers from Jaemin’s garden. He walked in on tentacles, long and thick ones that wrapped around the door frame and curled and uncurled as he talked. He muttered something about wishing they would just admit they were gay and asked Jaemin if he happened to have clams. Jaemin, looking amused, supplied him with an entire bucket of the little creatures. Ten gave him a jar in response and flounced out the door without even looking at you.

“Jaemin,” you asked, “what, or who, was that?” Jaemin laughed happily and the sound was so perfect that you wished he would just keep laughing forever.

“Ten is kind of unique,” Jaemin said. “Obviously, he’s got tentacles, which is unusual, and then he’s also not a vampire so none of us can quite figure out how he can get here, to Vahmpyr. But he can see the future, sort of, which is pretty helpful sometimes. Warns us when we’re getting too active and need to be careful of humans. He’s also convinced that Chenle and Jisung are gay and that they just need some guidance.”

You couldn’t decide on a question to ask about these revelations, so you settled for a very intelligent sounding “huh,” and continued your walking around the house. You were doing a lot better now with your exercises and had been able to make it around the room without holding onto anything for support four times now. Jaemin laughed again and you felt yourself actually flinch from the force of his happiness. It was addicting, almost. He went back to his Gaelic scrolls, which he was translating for a man called Kun, who you had yet to meet.

You had a sudden thought and you found yourself needing to talk, to explain about the other day. “Jaemin,” you said, dropping into the seat across from him at the table with a low groan. “The other day when Jisung and Jeno came, you guys were talking outside, you know?” He looked up from the scrolls, giving you a raised eyebrow like ‘so?’

“So I may or may not have listened to your conversation,” you told him, watching as he gave you his full attention, clicking his pen closed and rolling up the scrolls gently. He didn’t look angry, exactly, more apprehensive than anything. Like he was back to worrying about you throwing things and breaking his windows.

“And?” he prompted, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opened them you saw something strange there, like fear. But certainly the immortal and beautiful Jaemin couldn’t be scared of you. You must’ve been interpreting it wrong.

“Well you guys were talking about my smell,” you started slowly. “And, uh, you said that you- that I was causing you pain. And I was just wondering, why keep me around? Why not take me to a human hospital, or just kill me? Or turn me? Why did you make yourself suffer?”

He inhaled deeply and then shivered a little bit. When he spoke, his voice was soft and a little scratchy. “For one, we’ve never had a case like this before. I mean obviously there have been people who have smelled good to me before, but usually I’m able to ignore it. With you… it’s like my vampire body can’t get enough of your scent. It wants to turn you, to keep you, in its selfishness. That part of me is weak, in its greed. And of course I couldn’t kill you, I could barely control myself when Chenle- when he-” Jaemin took a deep breath to steady himself. “He wanted to bite you. You smell good to our whole coven, to everyone who’s met you, at least, which is a first. Thankfully you don’t appeal to Jisung the same way you do to me though, because by now you’d be a full fledged member of the family. Jeno is really good at hiding it, but I could tell he wanted to drink from you too, when you used him to help you walk the other day. I think the only ones not affected by it are Lucas and Ten, although that could be because they’re both straight, I’m not sure.” As an afterthought, he added, “actually Lucas is demisexual, I think.”

Skipping over the bit about Lucas’ sexuality, you spoke, horrified. “I’ve been hurting all of you? Seriously, why not just make me go to a regular hospital on Earth?”

“Well it would be a little hard to just give you to a hospital on Earth and be like, ‘here, take this body which may or may not have a vampire bite in its neck,’” Jaemin told you. “And also because I haven’t given up on a patient yet, and I didn’t want the first to be because I can’t control myself. And as to why I didn’t turn you… I didn’t want to take your life away. I still don’t. I think your life is going to be a good one and I don’t want to steal that. That’s why you’re going back tomorrow.”

An empty feeling settled in your chest. “You’re sending me back tomorrow? I still haven’t met so many of your friends though!”

He leveled you with a stare. “The rest of my patients never got to meet any other members of the coven. This was a one and done. You don’t need to know the rest of them. Especially not Yuta or Hyuck, good gracious.”

Who are Yuta and Hyuck? you wanted to ask, but his tone implied the end of the conversation, so you refrained from forming the question. “Okay, uh, I’m going to go sit in the garden.”

Jaemin flashed you a barely-there smile, opening his scrolls again and clicking his pen open. “Mhm. Be careful.”

You went out to sit under a tree in his front yard. Actually there were a lot of trees in his front yard - his house was in a forest. He had neglected to mention that when he first told you about his home and you had found it fascinating how it worked. When you walked out, there wasn’t any path out of the small clearing that housed his cottage. When you imagined a person, though, a tree tunnel would open and you could go any which way you wanted. You had tried imagining your parents the first time Jaemin told you about it and it hadn’t worked. He had explained that it only worked for people on this plane of existence, which made sense. When you had imagined Joy, it had shown you a way to a small town. Jaemin had forbidden you to go anywhere without him in case someone got territorial or hungry and killed you by accident. You respected that, you didn’t want to be murdered, but you wanted to see Lucas, and talk to him. He had fun stories to tell of his best friends. Jaemin seemed a bit huffy. It would be fine to go and see him, right? You’d just go and be back quickly before Jaemin even realized you were gone.

You decided that you just needed to talk to a friend right now and focused your mind on Lucas, finding an apartment building in the largest vampire city you had seen so far. With a little more effort you could find his apartment, although you couldn’t see him. The trees opened and you glanced back at Jaemin’s cottage before setting off.

As you walked down the path you reveled in your ability to walk. After two days of walking in short bursts and trying to regain strength in your legs you were finally able to walk like a normal human being, no flailing arms or stops every few meters to take a break and rest your muscles. It was nice, after so little freedom within Jaemin’s one room cabin. You liked being out here better. You avoided tree limbs and roots as you went, always focused on getting to Lucas. At one point your focus switched from his apartment to a convenience store and you panicked, realizing that you couldn’t go there. There, you might actually get murdered like Jaemin had predicted. He hadn’t nursed you back to health and struggled through your scent just for you to go and get yourself killed. You waited, walking more slowly, until the view at the end of the tunnel switched back to Lucas’ apartment’s front door. You breathed out a sigh of relief and continued on your way.

It was fascinating to you how there was no life in the forest besides the plants. You didn’t hear or see any insects or birds and you wondered if that was because they were afraid of the vampires or if they just didn’t exist on this plane. You decided to ask Lucas when you got to his house. After a while you realized that the image at the end of the tree tunnel was no longer a moving image of where you wanted to go, but rather the actual thing, growing bigger as you progressed down the path. You found yourself increasing your pace in your hurry to see Lucas.

When you left the comfort and relative safety of the forest, you nearly ran across the street separating the apartment complex from the trees. You stumbled at one point and almost fell to the pavement but recovered and kept going. You entered the main door and started up the stairs, still hurrying a little faster than your body thought was necessary. You speed walked until you reached the third floor and started looking through the numbers, looking for a door marked with ‘311,’ the one you had seen in the forest while looking for Lucas. After a good few minutes searching, you located the hallway his apartment was in and walked down it, looking at the odd numbers on the right. They counted down from 39, so you had a ways to go. Part of you wondered if the vampires just didn’t care about your presence, because apparently your scent was pretty strong and you were sure that you were stinking up the whole hallway with your human-ness, but nobody had come to murder you yet.

When you finally got to the door labeled with a faded ‘311,’ you stopped to take a breath before knocking on the door. An uncomfortable pause (where you wondered if Lucas was out after all) later, the door opened and you breathed out a sigh of relief, only for the air to stick in your throat at the sight of a man shorter than Lucas, but much scarier.

He had dark brown hair, obviously lightened but only a bit. It fell over his forehead and stopped just short of his eyes. His lips set in a grim line as he looked over you before they pulled back into what should have been a heart stopping smile, but was instead a snarl, a grimace of distrust and anger. The feature that stuck out most to you were his eyes. You imagined that when he was happy, his eyes would glow with an inner light. Now they were dark and they promised violence.

No sooner had you come to this conclusion before he had you pinned against the opposite wall. “Give me one good reason,” he hissed, “why I shouldn’t just kill you.” His arm pressed into your throat, keeping you pinned against the wall, on your tiptoes to accommodate the height of his arm.

Lucas, I came to see Lucas, you tried to say, but it got stuck on the way out of your throat and instead what came out was a weak, “Lu…” followed by a wispy groan. The man furrowed his brow and moved to hold you against the wall by your arms so you could speak. “Lucas,” you gasped, air rushing back into your body and allowing you to speak once more. “Friend.” The man put you completely down now, on the floor, and you moved to massage your throat before his eyes, dark and threatening, halted your movement. Lucas certainly has a knack for choosing friends, you thought.

“Don’t move,” he growled, “Or I’ll throw you out our living room window. It may not kill you, but it will hurt.” Then he turned around slightly and called, “Xuxi! There’s someone here to see you!”

You heard shuffling inside before the figure of Lucas appeared, tall and thick and seeming like safety incarnate in the presence of someone as terrifying as the man who still had one hand next to your head.

“Yang?” he asked. “Is everything alright?”

The man, Yang, shifted so that Lucas could see your face. “This one just came knocking on our door and said he wanted to see you. Do you know him?”

Lucas gasped slightly and sped up, blurring a little, so that he reached you in less than a second. “Oh my gosh, Y/N, are you okay? Yangyang, this is the human that’s been staying with Jaemin for the past week, he’s my friend!”

“Hey Lucas,” you said weakly, finally reaching up to massage your throat now that you had someone to protect you from being thrown out the living room window. “I’m okay, I think. Just a little lightheaded.” Part of you wanted to add, Is his name Yang or Yangyang? but you figured now wasn’t the time to ask.

A strange look crossed Lucas’ face. “Well, I’m glad you’re alright, come inside and sit down, I’ll get you some water.” You followed him into the apartment, Yang (Yangyang?) behind you. He still slightly scared you and you stayed as close to Lucas as possible. Lucas spoke again as he grabbed a water bottle for you. You noted idly that it was Dasani. “But, uh, didn’t Jaemin tell you to, like, not come out here? So you didn’t get murdered? Cause that could’ve ended a lot worse.”

“Not you too!” you cried, exaggerating the syllables. “I know I could’ve died, but I wanted to see my friend! How hard is that to understand? Did it bother you so much that I wanted to see you?”

Lucas figited uncomfortably. “Well I appreciate that you came to see me, that’s really nice of you. It’s just that Jaemin was right. This really isn’t a safe place for you to be. I mean Yangyang could’ve killed you if he didn’t have such a heart of gold.” You threw a disbelieving glance towards the man in question and he shrugged, mouth tugging up in a mischievous grin.

“Okay, I mean, I can go back if you don’t want me here, I have to be back before Jaemin realizes I’m gone anyway,” you said, drinking more of your water. Yangyang and Lucas both froze.

“You didn’t get his permission?” Lucas asked in a tone that confused you. Was he scared of Jaemin? “Or tell him you were going for a walk? Or anything?”

“No, of course not. He would’ve said no!” you protested unhappily. This was not how you imagined this trip going.

“Okay,” Lucas said. “I’m taking you back right now. Jaemin will- well, he won’t kill me, but he’ll be scarily close if he finds out you came here.”

With a heavy sigh, you stood up. You knew that if he needed to, he could just throw you over his shoulder and carry you all the way back to Jaemin’s cottage. Darned vampire strength. “Fine.”

You got down the hallway and into the stairwell before Lucas tensed up again. “Shoot,” he muttered, looking down the stairs below. You couldn’t hear or see anything, and you were about to tell him so when he sighed and you heard a pitter patter like rain, growing louder by the second.

Moments later Jamin appeared in front of you, pink hair mussed and eyes wild with a mix of fear and anger. For a moment he didn’t even speak, just glared at you. The fear faded from his eyes. When he did speak, the words seemed like poison being spit off the tongue of a snake.

“I can’t believe you,” he seethed. “I kept you in my house, fed you, nursed you back to health. I let you use all of my things and was even going to send you home once you were perfectly healthy again. I gave you one rule. One! Just to keep you safe! And you go and break it. You could have died, Y/N, do you understand that? I did everything in my power to keep you in an environment where you weren’t in danger! I didn’t allow Hyuck to come over, I made sure that you were prepared to meet Lucas and Jeno and even Jisung! But all of my efforts faded to nothing when you opened that doorway to the city. I’m taking you home right now, I can’t bear to keep you here any longer, not when you obviously have no sense of self preservation!”

He picked you up before you could even blink and you felt a sharp wind on your face as he ran home. His steps sounded like raindrops falling on pavement, sharp but small, a pinprick of sound in an otherwise silent stairwell. Lucas had disappeared from view in less than a second and you shut your eyes against the vertigo of being carried at such a speed. Everything blurred, everything was indistinct and most things weren’t even worthy of notice. Jaemin smelled like ink, and you had space in the very back of your mind to wonder if he had spilled his, in his haste to find you. It didn’t seem like a very vampire-like thing to do.

A few moments later you entered the canopy of the forest and every once in a while you heard a stick break under his foot or a rock get catapulted out of the way. Then you felt the sun on your back again and you gasped as Jaemin dumped you onto the warm grass, standing tall before you. He said something in a language you didn’t know - it sounded vaguely like Latin - and the grass fell out from under you as the ground opened up and you fell into space.

☽༓☾

When you woke up the next morning to your alarm, you wondered briefly if your entire experience with Jaemin and the other vampires was a dream. The puncture wounds that had been on your neck were utterly nonexistent, and there was no evidence on you that you had even left the comfort of your bed. On the other hand, you had clear memories of your time in Vahmpyr, short as it was. You remembered how it smelled and how the trees had felt as you walked outside. You remembered the feeling of the cool granite of the bathroom countertop. Mostly you remembered being with Lucas, Jeno, Jisung, and Chenle. You remembered almost dying at the hands of Lucas’ roommate and you remembered the terrifying flight in Jaemin’s arms.

Jaemin.

You grimaced at yourself in the mirror and spit out your toothpaste. There was no way your mind could have made up someone as excruciatingly kind and beautiful as Jaemin was. At the same time you felt anger bubble up inside of you. He hadn’t even given you a chance to say goodbye - he had just put you through to your Earthly self without any words between the two of you. You hadn’t said goodbye to Lucas or Jeno either, nor had you seen the rest of your new acquaintances. The anger flared, hot against your insides, and you could swear you actually felt your chest twinge. You spat out the last of your toothpaste and replaced your toothbrush in its holder, going to get ready for your day.

The next few days were spent alternately missing the simplicity of life on Vahmpyr and being angry at Jaemin. Assignments piled onto your shoulders and in addition to that, you discovered some sort of disconnect between you and the part of you that had stayed on Earth while you were out. That part of you seemed to dismiss your time in Vahmpyr as something it had dreamed up all on its own. It didn’t acknowledge you and liked to take control of your body whenever you weren’t paying full attention to it. Every time it did that you felt the twinge in your chest again, except it got more and more painful. You started having headaches that the other part of you didn’t seem to feel but which pressed against your skull like tiny war hammers thudding into the bone by your temples and occasionally your eyes.

Your vision would go blurry and you started having lapses of consciousness, only to wake up and find yourself doing just fine with your other part in charge. During these lapses you would dream of being in Vahmpyr again, and you saw Lucas smiling with Yangyang, Chenle rolling his eyes at Jisung before hugging him tightly. Other men you didn’t know and other women you hadn’t met also flew across the screen of your eyes but they disappeared quickly. Ten even passed by once, haughtily scrolling past everyone until he sidled up to a tall man with long blond hair who smiled down at him and pressed a gentle kiss to one of Ten’s tentacles. A man with red hair and an eyebrow slit served coffee to a man who chewed like a rabbit. A group of three guys held up a sign that said “Go Taemin!” as a group played football. A woman in a suit jacket over jean shorts sat with a box of papers, crying. Joy played a game with other girls where they tried to push lockers over on each other. Everything (with the exception of the lockers) looked like fun. It was better than Earth, at any rate. Every night you went to bed wondering if you might just die by morning and leave the other half of yourself behind to control the body. You were just along for the ride at this point.

The evening of your fourth day back on Earth you went to sit outside the dorm building on a bench, just for some fresh air. For once you had control of the body and you let your head tip back, closing your eyes and just feeling. The bench pressed up against your back in a way that hurt slightly, but your body had been wracked with pain for two days straight and it didn’t ache so much as behind your eyes or inside your skull. The evening breeze blew across your eyelids and brought with it the scent of sun-warmed dirt.

It smelled like Jaemin, that first morning you woke up in his house. When he had helped you across the cottage towards the bathroom and been outlined by the sun, when he had made you soup and sat with you on the couch while he explained where you were and what he was.

Your body shook with a particularly painful pound on the inside of your ribs. You let yourself relax against the bench again and the sensations enveloped you once more. You felt yourself let go of your body on Earth and float away, less falling and more weightlessness, floating away on a wind that smelled of sun on dirt and felt like arms wrapping around you while rain fell on summer-warmed pavement. You floated away on this wind and it lifted you endlessly until you nodded off, finally free of the pains that had kept you company for the past few days. You wondered if perhaps you had died of it, if being back on Earth had perhaps been more detrimental to you than beneficial.

Then your back hit something hard and the breath was knocked from your lungs, waking you up again and telling you that something had gone very very wrong or very very well. You gasped air back into your body and rolled over weakly, now in a body you recognized as the one you inhabited on Vahmpyr. Grass poked your inner arms and you pushed yourself up to sitting with your legs crossed. You massaged your chest as you inhaled and found yourself miraculously free of pain, aside from the slight burn of breath inhaled too quickly after loss of oxygen. The war hammers in your head had vacated the premises and the aches of your ribs had subsided, making it easier to breath and just sit without drawing in pained gasps.

You registered a return of cold as a shadow fell over you and looked up to see none other than Chenle, with Jisung behind him. Did they never go anywhere without each other? Well, besides hunting.

“Y/N?” He gaped down at you, and you looked back up at him.

“The one and only,” you said, before you realized that didn’t apply to you anymore. “Well, one of only two in existence.”

He laughed that weird dolphin laugh he had again and reached out a hand to help you up. You took it, standing unsteadily on two feet that didn’t ache the moment you put weight on them. “What’re you doing back here? Jaemin-hyung said he sent you back to Earth.”

You feel the corners of your mouth tug down almost instinctively at the mention of Jaemin. “He did. I don’t think Earth agreed with me,” you told him. Jisung walked forward and looked you up and down.

“Maybe we should take you back to Jaeminnie hyung, he’ll know what to do.”

You groaned. “I really don’t want to deal with him at the moment.”

“We can take him to Kun-ge,” Chenle interjected smoothly. “He’ll know better than Jaemin-hyung anyway, he’s been a doctor and a vampire longer.” A side of Chenle appeared that you hadn’t seen yet, a side that took charge in a way that wasn’t just insulting anyone near him. Maybe he wasn’t so bad after all. He took your hand with one of his and grabbed Jisung’s arm with the other.

“Come on, let’s go see Kun-ge!”

☽༓☾

Kun, as it happened, lived in the same building as Lucas. Actually he lived one apartment over, behind the door labeled ‘313.’ When he opened the door he seemed strangely unsurprised to see you there, just breathed out a sigh and let you in. He had nice light brown hair that worked well with his skin tone and eyes that smiled even when he wasn’t. He had this aura of parenting around him, like he took care of everyone he knew. It was comfortable to be around him from the start. Once Chenle had explained where he found you, Kun sat you down and asked exactly what had happened.

“Listen,” he said seriously. “I’ve never seen a human react the way you did. Nobody has ever come back, from what I know. We have to figure out exactly what happened, why you came back, and how to get you back to Earth.”

You inhaled deeply, relishing in the painless breath. “Okay, uh, I’m not really sure where to start,” you told him.

“Tell me about how you got sent home.”

“Okay. So, I left Jaemin’s cottage to come and see Lucas and I guess Jaemin is a lot scarier when he gets mad, because he was not happy when he found out I had left. He did this, like, superfast running thing, very Twilight, and carried me to this random clearing, I guess, I didn’t look around much.” You paused to let Kun write that down on his very professional looking clipboard, but he waved you on. Right, he was a vampire. He could write stuff fast.

“So he sort of dumped me on the ground and said something in a language I didn’t know, it sounded like Latin but I’m not sure. Then the ground sort of opened up and I fell and fell and fell until I rejoined my, uh, Earthly body.” You paused to take a breath and think about how to convey what happened when you got back to Earth.

“When I got back there was this weird disconnect with my body. Like, uh, there was me, in my body, and there was also this other part of me, the part of me that stayed behind when I came here the first time. That other part sort of took the main control of the body we lived in, and it felt like I was along for the ride. It liked to pretend that I wasn’t there, that my time here in Vahmpyr wasn’t real. It was weird. Then a little into my stay, I started getting these super bad pains all over my body.”

Kun interrupted you by holding up a finger. “How long were you home before the pains started?”

You thought back, struggling to pinpoint when they had started. “I think maybe a little longer than twenty four hours? When I got back I woke up in that body, and about one sleep later I started getting the pains, which would be like twenty five hours. Twenty four and a half, maybe. At first it was just these weird twinges in my chest, like my ribs were popping every time I took a breath, then it progressed. I got these horrible headaches, and my chest hurt all the time, and walking felt like attacking my feet, and my neck was always super achy. The thing is, my other half didn’t feel any of that. It was just my half of our consciousness. Then about on my fourth day back I went outside and sat on the bench outside my dorm. I laid back and, uh, it felt like I died or something. I just felt my consciousness leave the body and I guess the other half is still there living down there and now I’m here.”

Kun, Chenle, and Jisung all sat on the couch together, Kun looking over his notes while the other two guys just sat in silence. After a minute Kun spoke. “I don’t really know what happened to you, but I’m almost certain that your connection to your human self is gone. Or at least, your Earthly self. I don’t think we can send you back anymore, I’m sorry.” He looked at you, eyes full of remorse. You expected to mirror that feeling, but you discovered that it didn’t bother you so much. The other half of yourself would keep all of your friends and family from having to mourn you, and you could stay here, painless.

“I’m actually kind of glad about that,” you told them, and Chenle’s head snapped from picking at his jeans to look at you.

“Glad?” he demanded, incredulous. “To stay here?”

“Well yeah, I mean I was in pain most of the time I was back on Earth so it’s not like I’m eager to go back there. Plus, since I didn’t actually die nobody has to mourn me. And part of the time I was like… seeing Vahmpyr. Like is Ten dating this super tall guy with blonde hair? And Joy was pushing lockers over on her friends? And you two!” You turned an accusatory finger at Jisung and Chenle. “You two are adorable together!”

Jisung sighed. “Not you too…”

Kun shushed him. “You could see what was going on here in Vahmpyr?”

“Well, sort of,” you told him. “I saw that Lucas and Yangyang were having, like, a picnic?”

Kun’s eyebrows furrowed and he muttered, “I knew they had one without me.”

“I also saw this guy with red hair giving coffee to a man who sort of chewed like a bunny. And there was this group of three guys holding up a sign that said “Go Taemin!” I think, and I guess Taemin must have been playing football with the others I could see, although I couldn’t recognize any of the people playing. Oh, and there was this lady with really pretty hair who had a box of papers and she was just, like, sitting there and crying. She had the part of her hair near her neck bleached and the outer layers were still black, and she was wearing a suit jacket with jean shorts, which is kind of a weird combination.”

Kun looked over his notes. “That’s really interesting. All of those things have happened since you left, definitely. Joy and her friends like to play games where they try to kill each other, because they’re all immortal. The red haired man was probably Taeyong, and the bunny man would be Doyoung. Ten is dating Johnny, and yes, he is pretty tall and has blonde hair. I haven’t seen Taemin-hyung in a while so I don’t know if he’s playing football again or not. I don’t know about the woman with the cool hair either.”

“Definitely Taeyeon-noona,” Jisung interjected. “She broke up with her boyfriend a few days ago, and she does have hair dyed like that right now.”

Kun raised his eyebrows in curiosity. “Huh, I hope she’s doing okay. Actually I think maybe we should worry more about whoever she broke up with, she’s not exactly good with breakups.”

As though it’s a secret, Jisung’s next words came out in a whisper, and he leaned closer to Chenle and Kun. You had to strain a little to hear. “I heard it was a human. He, like, got super insecure about the fact that she wasn’t aging with him and broke up with her. It’s killing her. She really liked that guy.”

“Why did she get with him in the first place?” Chenle sounded absolutely confused. “She knew it would end like this. That’s how the last two ended.”

“I don’t know, but now I’m really worried for the guy,” said Kun. “We might have to cover up for her.” The implications of his words sank in and you made a small sound. All three men snapped their heads up and it looked as though they forgot you were there.

“Oh, my gosh, I’m so sorry Y/N! Do you have anywhere to stay where you’ll be safe for at least a few days? Jaemin’s cottage should be pretty easy to stay hidden in.”

“He doesn’t want to go and see him after what happened,” Chenle supplied helpfully. “I’m taking him back to my place once we’re done here.” Kun appeared to consider that, and then nodded his approval.

“That sounds alright. Tomorrow we can go out and get him some things to make his stay more comfortable. Maybe we can find one of the Outer Plots to put him on.”

“Outer Plots?” you asked, because the way he said it demanded capitalization in your head.

“They’re sort of exactly what they sound like,” Kun explained. “There are these pieces of land around the edges of the towns that nobody really lives on but they’re solid places to live, if we can get a good one. It’s a little bit like Jaemin’s land out there, lot’s of forest, so we can set up tree tunnels for you to get here fast, if you need to.”

You nodded. “That does sound pretty good. I don’t know what I’m going to do though, it’s not like I have all that many hobbies. I was midway through getting my bachelor’s when I left.”

“That’s fine,” Chenle said. “I have plenty of things to keep you entertained, and we can get some of the other guys to keep you company if we’re busy. There are a lot of us with a lot of open time. I also have a ton of extra textbooks from learning languages, so if you want you can spend your life becoming fluent in Japanese, Latin, French, German, Scottish Gaelic, Hawaiian, or one of the others I have. Or multiple, if you learn fast.”

“Thanks Chenle.” He wasn’t actually so bad, you thought. He had brought you to Kun and he was offering to let you use his house and his things. “I might just take you up on that.”

“You guys should probably leave now, actually,” Kun said. “At human speeds you’ll get home right on time.”

Chenle checked his watch and nodded. “He’s right. We should get going.”

You thanked Kun again and Chenle led you out the door, Jisung following behind you. You separated ways with him once you left the apartment building, his figure disappearing swiftly into the trees. Once you blinked there was no finding him again.

You walked behind Chenle quietly, choosing to observe your surroundings. You didn’t see much in the way of low quality or old houses here. It seemed as though a lower class had been eradicated entirely and the vampires could choose where they wanted to live. When you asked him how that was possible, Chenle laughed that peculiar screech of his and said, “when you’re reborn into a family of beings that has been around for millenia, you accumulate some shared wealth. Especially when some of the coven members have doctorate degrees and work on Earth full time, and some of us had familial connections as well, like money left in wills and such.”

You nodded. “So you guys are basically like the elite class of the universe.”

“Pretty much. My house is probably the biggest you’ll ever be in, because I like to splurge a little bit. Unfortunately you might get lost, though, and if you do, just call for me. I’ll make sure to be listening all night in case you need me.”

“It’s that big?” you asked in disbelief. “Do you live in Buckingham Palace?”

He grinned, showing off his incisors. “Bigger.”

“And you live alone?”

“Well, I haven’t always. Jisung and I will probably have sleepovers for all of eternity, and whenever a new coven starts they stay with me for a few days while they get their own living quarters set up, but for the most part , yes. I don’t actually spend a ton of time in the house, it’s more just for the sensation of owning a building that large.”

You shook your head. “As a broke college student, I find that completely unfair. I was working two jobs just to keep my head above water and you’re on this alternate plane just chilling in your house that’s bigger than Buckingham Palace.”

He smiled again. “Nobody said life was fair, Y/N. Nobody.”

☽༓☾

Three days and a shocking amount of Gaelic verbs later (you only got lost in Chenle’s palace four times), a house was ready for you to move in. Johnny and Ten had furnished it for you, and Chenle had explained that the two of them were the stylists of the coven, for the most part. The mysterious Yuta had also taken part in finding high quality fabrics to fit their vision. You had thanked the whole group of vampires who helped with the house profusely for not only building said house, but also for getting you a bunch of comfortable furniture. They had smiled and said it was their pleasure and all of the typical things, but what really stood out was Ten’s reaction. He had barely paid attention to you - he barely paid attention to anyone besides Johnny and Yangyang, who he called their baby - this whole time. When you had thanked him, however, he wrapped all but four of his tentacles around you in a surprisingly dry hug.

“It’s refreshing to have you around,” he had told you. “I’m glad we could help you get settled.”

Later as you reflected on it, you figured that it probably got pretty boring to know what was going to happen all of the time, and maybe you had disrupted the usual happenings of his visions and the vampires in Vahmpyr. Maybe you made other people happy too, to have a new person around.

One person who didn’t seem thrilled to have you back was Jaemin. Every time you made eye contact with him (twice, over the three days), he grimaced and turned away like the sight of you hurt him. Maybe he was mad that you were back within scenting range. He wouldn’t get near you, so it wasn’t like you could ask.

While settling into your new normal, you discovered that Chenle was actually a good friend. His love language was insults and pointed jabs, but he actually did care for his friends quite a lot. He had watched Jaemin from across your front yard as they were laying down grass seed and sighed.

“I wish he would just talk to you,” he told you sadly. “I’ve never, in all our years together, seen him like this. I’m not sure anyone has, even Taeil-hyung.” He didn’t elaborate on who Taeil was, and you didn’t press him. Was Jaemin really so mad that he couldn’t even look at you?

“Well,” you had said, “I don’t want to talk to him. He dumped me through an interplanar tunnel without warning me and yelled at me like the world was ending when I took a walk. I don’t think there’s much to be talked about. He must hate me.” Over Chenle’s shoulder, you had seen Jaemin flinch slightly. How strange. Part of you hoped that he felt the same pain that you did, a sort of ache that told you that you were unwanted. Another part of you murmured quietly in the back of your mind that you were being petty. You had chosen to ignore it for the time being. You were being petty, but so was he. He had thousands of years on you, so he should be the mature one, right?

“I don’t think he hates you. I think you both need to grow up and talk like adults,” Chenle had said flatly, orange hair seeming to flash in the sun. Jaemin sort of curled in on himself.

“Tell that to Mister Millenia before you lecture me on growing up,” you had replied. Then you reopened your Gaelic textbook and pretended to bury yourself in it, blatantly ignoring Chenle’s judgemental gaze.

“Fine,” he had muttered angrily. “You can both suffer for all I care.” Then he had stalked off and started pounding fence posts into the dirt so hard that Jeno had to tell him to take a break before he broke them.

You found yourself thinking about that moment as you walked through the trees, ironically on your way to see Jaemin. Since you had close to nothing to do , you had offered yourself up as an errand person to anyone that would hire and found yourself working for Kun running scrolls across Vahmpyr while he translated and examined them. It kept you busy and in shape, and Kun seemed happy with your service. This morning he had sent you to get the Scottish scroll back from Jaemin, along with a few other documents to pick up and drop off. You had saved this one for last, procrastinating on having to see him again. As his cottage came into full view, you sighed, preparing yourself for a cold shoulder and a very quick visit.

“Jaemin?” you called, knocking on the front door. It was closed for once, usually he kept it open for better air circulation. A moment later the door opened and there he stood, in all his cotton candy colored glory.

“Y/N? What’re you doing here?”

“Kun sent me, he wants that Scottish scroll back. He said he hopes you’re done translating it since you’re had it for a few weeks now,” you replied, willing your voice to stay professional. You were here for the scroll. When Jaemin didn’t reply, you looked up at him. “So? Where is it?”

“I don’t know why he sent you out like this, but I sent that scroll back three days ago, on our agreed upon date. I know he got it, because he sent me back a thank you with those little stickers he likes to use.”

“Oh. Um, I’ll just go then,” you muttered, turning around as you spoke. “Sorry I bothered you.”

Suddenly a hand was wrapped around your own, keeping you in place. Your breath caught in your throat, remembering the last time that had happened with a vampire. All that came out of Jaemin’s mouth, however, was, “Can I talk to you? Please?”

“Jaemin, please let me go,” you said, trying to keep your tone even. His hand released you immediately and you stepped a pace away from him and turned around so that you could see his face. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Well, uh, do you want some tea? I have some inside…” It was clear he hadn’t expected you to actually agree and he needed to collect his thoughts, so you nodded and he led you inside, sitting you on the familiar couch while he busied himself in the kitchen.

“I actually wanted to apologize,” Jaemin said after a minute. “I worried so much about protecting you that I forgot to let you enjoy your time here. It scared me how good you were at adjusting to this world, how much you liked being with Lucas and my other friends… I’m not used to humans reacting positively.” The kettle whistled and he took a moment to pour water into the mugs, steam rising gently from them in silvery whisps.

Once he poured the water, he continued speaking. “I wanted to make sure you knew that it wasn’t all fun and games here. I didn't want you to go looking for a place in our community because I was worried that you’d get killed. Vampires are pretty possessive of their property on Vahmpyr, for the most part, and you went right into one of the biggest apartment complexes within a day’s travelling distance - and that’s vampire distance, not human distance. Lucas told me about what happened with Yangyang, and I almost tore Yang’s arm off, I was so mad. He could have actually murdered you, and I couldn’t stomach the thought. What if Lucas hadn’t been home? What if Yangyang hadn’t given you that one moment to explain yourself? What if you had met another one of us on the stairs, without any protection? It terrified me to consider.” He walked over, a mug carried in each hand, and sat on the couch, leaving a large space in between you. It was strangely reminiscent of that first day, when he had explained Vahmpyr to you over soup.

“Of course,” Jaemin started, and you refocused. “That was only after I had sent you home, that he told me about that. When I dumped you in that tunnel, it was just fear of you being unsafe that made me so mad. The fact that you would willingly put yourself in danger, when I valued you so highly? Inconceivable. And yet, it happened. So I made another big mistake: I sent you home. I thought you would be better off there, regardless of what was happening. I knew you were healthy enough to walk to the city, so I thought you were fine. Apparently not. I heard from Chenle and Kun what happened to you back on Earth and it broke another part of me apart. I hurt you, in sending you back, not just in temporary emotional pain, but in physical pain that persisted through your entire stay. We still don’t know why you reacted the way you did, but it scared me to hear of it. I had made yet another mistake that could have killed you.” He paused to take a sip of his tea, and you did too. It was pleasant, not too hot and not too cold, just warming up your insides.

“Then the last straw came when you said I must hate you…” Jaemin’s voice broke slightly. “If anything, it’s the exact opposite, I realized I missed you more than I should, given you should be just a patient. I wanted to hug you the second I saw you, but you looked so mad to see me that I couldn’t do it. I was literally building a house for you and still couldn’t look you in the eyes for more than a moment. So I went home in shame, knowing that you were right, with thousands of years under my belt, I should be the more mature one. I decided that the next time I saw you, I would talk to you, no matter the circumstances. I couldn’t have you keep living thinking that I hated you. I didn’t actually expect you to come in when I asked. I thought I’d have to follow you through the woods, honestly.”

He fell silent, took another sip of his tea, and for the first time, you spoke. “I really didn’t want to talk to you. I wanted you to realize how much I hurt from your actions, but I think maybe I took that a little too far. I knew you were protecting me, but I really wanted to see somebody, and I knew you wouldn’t let me out, so I ran away. I didn’t really know what I was getting into. I probably should have asked you to accompany me, at least. Not my finest moment.”

Jaemin laughed weakly, taking another sip of tea. “Not mine either. I should have trusted you more.”

“And I shouldn’t have run off without even asking for your help..”

He smiled at you, that gorgeous little smile that made your heart smile back.

“Friends?” you asked.

He hesitated for only a moment, a strange sort of disappointment flashing across his face, before he was extending his hand to meet yours. “Friends.”

You grinned at him, finishing your tea. “Great. Now I need to go yell at Kun for sending me out to see you when I didn’t need to.”

“Isn’t it good that he did?” Jaemin asked with a confused frown on his face.

“Well yes, but it was a very Cupid-like thing to do, wasn’t it? I don’t tolerate my friends trying to play Cupid with myself and my other friends.” You stood up and walked your empty tea cup to the kitchen. “Do you want to come?”

He laughed. “No, you can just tell me all about it tomorrow, okay?”

You nodded. “Alright.”

You walked out into the cool twilight and started going towards Kun’s house. He had a big storm coming.

☽༓☾

A few days later, you were sitting in Jaemin’s cottage again, Gaelic textbook open on your lap. Since he was close to fluent in the language, he was helping you learn it. It wasn’t an extraordinarily difficult language, but some of the words were hard to pronounce and he had been eager to help you.

“Look here,” he said, pointing at some words on the page. “Say this for me.”

“Tha gaol agam ort,” you replied. He grinned.

“That’s how it’s written, but not how it’s said. Okay, now listen to me pronounce it. ‘Ha geul akeum orsht’. Repeat that for me.”

“‘Ha geul akeum orsht’? That’s how you say that?” you demanded. “This is like French! They don’t spell things anywhere close to how they’re said!”

“Unfortunately, most languages don’t. The same goes for Korean verb conjugations and English words and, yes, French everything, but it’s just learning new rules. After a while you understand it. I promise that you’ll get it eventually. You have the rest of your life.”

You looked over at him suddenly, questions rising to the forefront over Gaelic words. “Am I really going to stay here forever? Am I never going to see Earth again, just sit here as a useless human surrounded by powerful and immortal vampires, until I die?”

He seemed surprised by the questions. “I’m not sure any of us had really thought about it,” he said carefully.

“You all had just accepted the fact that I was stuck on your plane of existence with nothing worth doing to do? When am I going to use Scottish Gaelic, Jaemin? When will this actually come in handy, except to distract me? I’m here to do nothing, and the moment I go back to Earth, I start suffering. What am I meant to do here, Jaem?”

Jaemin gently lifted the textbook from your lap and put in on his coffee table, then pulled you into his side for a hug. You snuggled into him, inhaling the scent of sunshine and warm earth. Comfort.

“I don’t know exactly how to make you feel better,” Jaemin murmured from somewhere above your head. “But we all like having you around, you know that. It’s nice to have someone young around. We haven’t turned a human in about thirty years, so the novelty has worn off, and here we have this beautiful creature who is new in so many ways. You’re refreshing, and you’re human, so you’ll continue to be refreshing.”

“Well, thank you,” you said, muffled in his side. “But still, I don’t feel like I have anything worth doing here. You can all do anything I can do, just ten times faster. I have no unique skills or brains or anything. So what am I meant to do? I can’t even go spy on the other humans or anything because I can’t go back to Earth!”

Jaemin shifted you a little bit in his arms and started rubbing your shoulder softly. “Is there anything you particularly enjoy doing? Maybe you could do art, or gardening? Or I have this book of old forms of witchcraft?”

You turned to face him. “You have a book of witchcraft sitting around?”

He released you and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “I found a papyrus scroll in this ruined Egyptian city, and I kept it just ‘cause it was cool. Then I learned hieroglyphics so that I could translate it and made a copy. Unfortunately, witchcraft is… not my strong suit, and I’m somewhat afraid of giving it away in case I never see it again. I spent a lot of time and energy on that translation.”

“And you want me to use it?” you asked, confused. Why on earth would he give it to you if he didn’t trust the perfectly composed vampires around him? “I mean it sounds super cool, but aren’t you worried about it being in my hands? I am a human, after all.”

“Well-”

Jaemin was cut off at that moment by a sharp knock on the door. At least, you assumed it was a knock, it sounded a little bit more like a wet thwap than a knock. Jaemin blurred slightly as he ran over to the door and opened it, revealing cloudy skies dropping rain onto a harried-looking Ten.

“Ten-hyung?” he asked, sounding as confused as you felt. “I’d say this is a nice surprise, but why are you here? I thought today was your Earth day? Is everything alright?”

“Yes,” Ten said, gasping slightly as he spoke. “I ran straight here from the Pacific.” You took a second to think about the fact that Ten was swimming in the Pacific Ocean before refocusing on him. “-future just completely shifted, a few minutes ago. Y/N-” He turned to face you completely. “Whatever you two just did, it caused you to become a vampire in the future.”

“But we were just talking?” you told him, confused. “It wasn’t like Jaem was about to bite me.” You turned to Jaemin. “Right?”

He looked at you solemnly. “If you were going to have been bitten by me, it would have already happened. Ten-hyung, are you sure that he’s a vampire in your future? Can you see more details?”

Ten closed his eyes briefly like he was trying to focus, and in the meantime a tentacle wrung the salt and rain water out of his hair. Jaemin wrinkled his nose at the growing puddle. Ten spoke, eyes fluttering open slowly. “In the parts I can see, he’s covered in this, like, tree? It’s a little bit fuzzy. It’s green, and looks like it has brown splotches like branches. Maybe a tree falls on him or something. Anyway, you take one look at him and bite ‘im. He goes limp... After that? Fuzzy scenes of him waking up and you taking him running. Like, really running. Vampire running.”

Jaemin took a shaky breath. “Okay, I don’t know why our conversation would have caused a tree to fall on him in the future. We were talking about, like, Earth and art and stuff. Oh, and my witchcraft book.”

Ten’s eyes refocused on him, narrowing slightly. “You’re going to give him your witchcraft book after not letting me touch it? That’s a little underhanded.” His eyes narrow briefly before looking at you. “But maybe that’s it. You’ll just have to make sure that he doesn’t practice any witchcraft under the cover of trees. Otherwise I think you’ll be fine. I’ll keep you updated.”

“Thanks Ten,” you murmured. “For warning us and stuff.”

“Of course. Now I need to go back to the Pacific. Ta ta!” Ten waved to you and walked out the door.

“Well,” Jaemin said, “that’s some news, huh?”

“Yeah,” you exhaled. “Do you think that it’s okay for me to practice witchcraft with this in my future?”

“I do. I think you’ll be fine. We’ll keep you as safe as we possibly can, and if you become a vampire… at least it won’t be because I gave in. I’ll still be strong.”

“Jaem, I don’t think that was ever in question.”

“It was for me.” His voice went dark momentarily, then he brightened up again. “At any rate, I think we can safely teach you some things that’ll keep life interesting.”

You grinned. “Then let’s get started.”

☽༓☾

You were surprised at how easily witchcraft came to you, in the beginning. Jaemin insisted that you had some sort of gift with it, and as much as you told him that was silly, it seemed possible. You could easily understand instructions on Jaemin’s careful translations that even he couldn’t decipher. You gave up on Gaelic after a while, focused more on learning the original Egyptian Hieroglyphs of the spells and potions. You trusted Jaemin’s precise translation, but there was something unique about seeing an instruction in a new language and being able to understand it.

Days turned to weeks as you experimented with the materials growing in and around Vahmpyr. Taeil, who you eventually met, turned out to be a valuable resource. He was an avid collector of ancient written works, including but not limited to an original Greek copy of The Odyssey, Chinese bamboo books saved from the book burnings of Emperor Qin Shi Huang, and an exact replica of the Rosetta Stone. Taeil must have been ancient himself to have all of these valuables, but he still had the energy of the far younger members of their coven, which amazed you. He showed you different specialties of different cultures within witchcraft, ideas born from scrolls and tablets, bamboo strips and wax blocks. It was far more information than you could ever decipher or use during your short human life, but every day you got better, starting out small with poultices that you had to injure yourself to try and ward spells that exhausted you but could make your home more secure than any in Vahmpyr (or on Earth).

At one point Chenle gifted you a book covered in old stains and strangely familiar drawings that you started to use before abruptly realizing that it was an old chemistry textbook. You invited him over that afternoon and whacked him over the head with the thick pages. He told you with a disgruntled look that he put a lot of effort into that, thank you very much. And besides, chemistry was a magic in itself. (His words, not yours.) After that you made sure to thoroughly inspect any gifts you received from the more mischievous family members.

Lucas came over and helped you set up more complicated equipment that you couldn’t lift, like a big cauldron, which you actually did use on the regular after you learned how to use it, and after some consideration you set up a chemistry station for the odd experiment. At this point your house was more magical items than actual living space, something that Kun was quick to point out when he came over.

“You know, you should really be more careful about having all of these powders and dusts and-” He cut himself off with a distasteful wrinkle of his nose. “Things.” He pursed his lips, looking at you. “We don’t really know what these things will do to you in the long run. You have to be careful.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you responded distractedly, making his coffee and a drink for yourself. “Maybe I’ll clean it all up sometime, but you know I’m awfully busy these days.” You used a spoon to stir in the milk and sugar, tapping the metal against the china in a soft clink.

He sighed tiredly. “Your health is less important than staying busy?”

You gave him a look that you hoped conveyed your need to stay busy, to continuously learn and improve. “Keeping my schedule full keeps me healthy, Kun. At least mentally.”

Kun didn’t look impressed by your reasoning. “I think your mental health will go down pretty quickly if you get sick and can’t do anything because you’re stuck in bed twenty-four-seven.”

You gave a sigh of your own at that. “And as always,” you announced to the room at large, “Doctor Kun gives amazing advice that I shouldn’t ignore but probably will.”

Y/n,” he said in a warning tone. “Seriously. You need to be careful! No human has ever lived here for so long, and I worry about you catching some mysterious illness that nobody has ever heard of!”

“Kun, I will do my best to keep myself healthy. I’ve put every kind of ward that I can around my house to protect me, I have magically circulated and cleaned air, I have literal superhumans to protect me from anything else, and I’m happy here! I finally have something to contribute. Maybe someday I’ll find some concoction or enchantment that will let me visit Earth, even. I just don’t know. But I’m going to keep trying.”

He took his coffee out of your grasp and walked back into the living room, which housed your indoor plants, magical and earthly. “That’s all I can ask,” he said, voice betraying his disappointment in that fact. “I’ll still give you monthly checkups for a while though, just to make sure.

“Can’t Jaemin take care of me?” you asked, thinking of Jaemin with his warm smile and caring words and the smell of sun on dirt and- well. Jaemin felt like safety in a person. Kun was wonderful, but Jaemin was just that little bit better, that little bit more comfortable to be around.

“He could,” Kun replied after taking a sip of coffee. “But I know he’s been busy lately though, he’s been on Earth for a few days checking on all of his businesses and stocks and his human personas. On the other hand, I hardly go back to Earth for more than a twelve hour shift here and there.”

“I understand.”

“Plus, I’m about two thousand years older than Jaemin, I have a lot of experience.”

“How old are you?” Two thousand years older than Jaemin would make Kun… pretty darn old.

Kun grinned. “I was around before and after Jesus came to Earth. I was around before the Terracotta Army was built. I was born in China circa when the Hanging Gardens of Babylon are said to have been built. Taeil-hyung turned me into a vampire when I was twenty five, and I’ve been twenty five ever since. None of us know when he was born. When you’re as old as he is, even with a vampire’s memory, history starts to blend together. He says he remembers the Pyramids at Giza going up, though, and that was after he had been a vampire for what he thinks was a few hundred years. He’s literally prehistoric.”

“Wow,” was all you could think to say. No wonder Taeil had so many artifacts. He was one. Kun was too, for that matter. And Jaemin… Jaemin would have been born AD, but how far into it? You asked Kun this question and he chuckled.

“Jaemin was born in fourteen forty two. He was twenty when Jeno turned him, and he’s still twenty, five hundred years later.”

“Who turned Taeil, then? I can hardly imagine a vampire older than him, even.”

“We’re not sure. Whoever it was is so unimaginably old now that even I can’t comprehend it. But whoever the original vampire was must have turned a whole lot of people. There are dozens more vampires just within our small community, and an entire plane full of them. From what I can tell, Taeil isn’t even the oldest. There’s this man who lives in the mountains by himself, and from what I hear, he hasn’t been seen by another vampire in nearly three thousand years. He’s almost a myth around here anymore. Taeil knew him back when Vahmpyr was sparsely populated, and he told us that the man - his name is Jinyoung Park - is older than him by so many years that he is to Taeil as Taeil is to me. He probably lived before Mesopotamia existed, even, or was right at the beginning of it. Before him, we have no idea who the first vampire was. If that vampire is still alive, he she or they hasn't been seen since, well, before living memory. If they still exist that would mean that vampires have been around since before modern humanity. I really wish we knew.”

“I wish you knew too,” you breathed. You had never really considered that immortality meant that the same vampires who existed before the Pyramids at Giza still lived among humanity today. It was mind boggling. The history in just their brains alone could fill thousands of textbooks and solve history’s greatest mysteries. But they couldn’t show themselves to the humans without risk. Even the people that they bit and sent back to Earth wouldn’t dare talk about their experiences, for fear of sounding crazy. Their gift to the world would never be wrapped up in gold tissue paper and presented with the proper awe, but here you were, in this modern metropolis of history. It truly hurt your brain to consider everything that came with that sort of age.

Just then a yell came from outside. “Kun-ge! Are you with Y/N?!” It sounded suspiciously like a panicked Yangyang. He never got panicked.

Kun stood up and hurried over to the front door, blurring in his hurry. “What happened?” he demanded.

“Well, uh, we may or may not have set Yuta’s house on fire…” Yangyang’s voice trailed off as Kun’s face reacted. First his eyebrows raised, then his mouth dropped open, and finally his eyes squeezed shut before reopening after a moment.

“You did what?”

Yangyang’s voice was small. “We set Yuta’s house on fire?” His voice was so high and squeaky that it sounded more like a question than a statement.

“Who is ‘we’?”

“Me, and Hyuck, and Taemin-hyung.”

“Oh my,” Kun said, running a hand over his face and through his hair. “I am going to murder Taemin-hyung.” He turned to Yangyang. “I might murder you and Donghyuck too.”

“We didn’t mean to,” Yangyang said. “It just happened.”

“You didn’t mean to set Yuta’s house on fire? How do you accidentally set someone’s house on fire?”

“You put on an impromptu fire show right next to the house, mess up a trick, and accidentally throw a flaming baton on their house. It was surprisingly easy. Anyway, I know that you would know what to do. You and Y/N both.”

Kun ran his hand through his hair again. You watched as a few light brown strands flew to the carpet with the force of it. “Y/N, do you have anything for flaming houses?”

You looked around your living room as though that would help you remember whether you did or not. “I think so, let me check my storage room,” you muttered, already dashing away. You did, in fact, have something that you loosely translated from the Egyptian spell scroll as “Fire Away Goop,” or something similar. It was a green, nearly transparent goop that sloshed in its bottle but it was too thick to really flow. It oozed more than anything. When it hit heat, it tended to solidify into a more solid green that would be easily removable from Yuta’s house, if said house was still there by the time you got to wherever it was. You grabbed the bottle and rushed back to the living room, panting. Kun turned to you.

“Is it okay if I carry you, to make sure we get there in time?”

“Won’t I be too heavy?”

He gave you an unimpressed look. “We’re literally the strongest things known to man. I’ll be fine.”

“Then sure. Let’s go save Yuta’s house!”

Kun carried you piggyback as fast as he could, your face tucked into his shoulder to avert most of the vertigo induced by such high speeds. Trees flashed by in browns and greens, and then you were going through the city, past the city, through more trees, in a rush that you couldn’t quite comprehend but which caused a sinking feeling to settle in your gut. Yuta’s house was far away. By the time you got there, the house was fully consumed by the flames, the fire burning merrily without knowledge that it was ruining a man’s home.

A man, presumably Yuta, stood out front, another man on his knees next to him. Once you were next to them, you realized that the standing man had the kneeling man’s ear in a tight grip. You figured that the man on his knees must have been the infamous Donghyuck.

“Yuta-hyung, Hyuck,” Kun greeted them as he set you on the ground.

“Yangyang,” said Yuta, turning around, “You’re a bit late.” He nodded at you and Kun in acknowledgement, as Donghyuck yelped at the tug on his ear. Yuta had black hair streaked through with neon green, and it framed a narrow face and startlingly pink lips. You wondered, in the back of your head, if he used lip tint. You also briefly entertained the idea that he contoured his face, because there was no way that he looked that good without makeup. He’s a vampire, your consciousness provided. All of them look that good.

“Sorry hyung,” Yangyang murmured. “We came as fast as we could!”

Kun stepped forward. “We brought Y/N, as you can see, and he has something to put the fire out.” Something like hope sparked in Yuta’s eyes as he looked over you again, taking in details of your appearance.

“Do you really? Well, go ahead.” He gestured to the house and the flames danced in your face, leaving you to hope that this gloop worked for fires this big. You took a deep breath and poured the goop onto the grass, where it oozed between the blades of grass like a big blob of snot on the lawn.

“Atlaq alnaar,” you murmured to it, and it rose into the air, following your mental directions toward the fire. The moment they made contact, the goop started to solidify and expand, covering the fire rapidly. Green overtook bright reds and oranges as you focused on the fire and made the goop cover it.

“Y/N!” Someone was calling to you, their voice out of focus as though you heard them from underwater. “You’ll get covered!” You were vaguely aware of a hand trying to lead you away, but the spell kept you rooted in place, your feet seemingly super glued to the lawn. You kept focus on the fire as the last flames were overtaken and put out. Yuta’s house was now a giant green blob. From what you could see through the jello-like goop, it had sustained a minimal amount of damage considering the amount of flames you had seen. You were so engrossed in the green substance that you missed the warning signs before it swallowed you up too, ever expanding.

It took your outstretched hands first, pulling you forward into it. Through your panic you had just enough brain power left to be amazed at how thick it was before your feet and legs were covered too, nearly encased in the goop. You leaned your head back as far as you could, trying to keep yourself in the open air, but the goop kept expanding. You felt more than saw the vampires try to dig you out, but while the spell still fueled it, the goop was surprisingly strong. A hand grasped your elbow as the goop grasped your neck and chin, keeping you completely still as it covered more of you. The hand let go. It couldn’t do anything now.

You took a deep breath just before the goop covered your mouth, nose, and eyes. You thought you felt something on the back of your neck but didn’t think much of it until it started burning. Any strength you had left crumbled as your eyes started stinging and your oxygen ran out. You couldn't see, but it felt as though the world was spinning around you, as though you had been disconnected from everything but the pain. Even through your lightheadedness the pain persisted. It had spread now, from your neck over your shoulders like the creeping vines on the back wall of Jaemin’s cottage.

Jaemin.

You realized through your hazy thoughts that you would never see him again. Your eyes and nose burned now, from tears you couldn’t cry and the pain slowly enveloping you.

You couldn’t hold on any longer.

Black.

☽༓☾

Across a forest and a small town, Jaemin was working on his Hindi pronunciation when Ten burst into his home for the second time in what seemed like a very short period. He wasn’t dripping this time, just looked thoroughly terrified of something.

“Jaemin! He needs help!”

“What? Who?” Jaemin stood up and walked over to his friend. Ten’s tentacles curled and uncurled repeatedly as he spoke.

“Y/N! The vision got sharper, which usually means it’s happening. The green blob wasn’t a tree, it was some sort of spell! He’s going to die if we don’t get there fast.”

“Where are we going?” Jaemin demanded as they ran through the trees around his cabin.

“Yuta’s house. Or, at least, where it used to be.”

“What happened to Yuta’s house?”

“Yangyang and Hyuck burned it down.”

“Ah.”

Ten was panting as he continued speaking. “I think that must be what the spell was for. Some sort of fire putter-outer.”

Jaemin tried to think back to all of the books he had given you, recalling a spell that sounded suspiciously like what Ten described. “If the one I think you’re talking about is the spell he used,” he told Ten, “we might not be able to save him by the time we get there.” A pang echoed through his chest. An empty feeling, as though your small human life had affected his own so strongly as to make him miss you without knowing that you were gone. Jaemin ran on, leaving Ten behind when he paused to rest, sprinting at his highest speed towards where you were.

When he arrived on Yuta’s plot, most of his vision turned green, not because things were actually green, but from the sheer size of the lime coloured stuff all over Yuta’s house. He had been correct when he guessed at which spell you had used. His gaze fell on Kun, Yangyang, Yuta, and Donghyuck, who stood at the still-expanding base of the blob, seemingly trying to get something out. He gasped. You were in the thing. He ran up and tried to help the others dig you out, to no avail. They couldn't do anything against the spell so long as you were alive, and he wasn’t about to kill the person he had worked so hard to protect. He tried to hold onto your elbow as it was swallowed, but was afraid of hurting you. They all watched as you took a deep breath and the gloop covered your face.

Jaemin slumped, out of ideas. There was no way to save you that he knew of. Then he thought back to Ten’s vision. He had to change you. It was the only way. You wouldn’t need to breathe, wouldn’t need to do anything. You could still be here with him. It was with that in mind that he lunged forward at the last moment and latched onto your neck, stretching his jar as wide as it would go. His fangs, already dripping uncomfortably with venom in your presence, sank into your veins, and he felt it as you stiffened slightly. You couldn’t move much in your current situation, but your muscles seized all the same. He stayed next to you as long as he could, until he was in danger of being swallowed into the goop as well. He licked the wounds closed as efficiently as possible and stepped back with the others to see what happened.

It was obvious that you had gone unconscious. The goop stopped moving so rapidly and seemed to pause in its conquest of the front yard. It started oozing slowly around again, creating something of a reverse muffin top as the top shell hardened and the bottom bits leaked out. They backed up to the edge of the yard and Jaemin used his (admittedly small) knowledge of spellcraft to create wards that would protect the house down the street and hopefully contain the goo. They watched in silence as the green kept expanding. Then Yangyang spoke.

“Will Y/N die?”

“I don’t think so,” said Jaemin slowly. “He shouldn’t, at any rate. I bit him.”

A collective tremor went around the group, as though none of them wanted to appear surprised but they all were.

“It was the only thing I could think of that gave Y/N a chance, so I had to try it,” Jaemin continued. “But Kun-hyung knows more than me on that subject.”

Kun looked pensive as he considered what Jaemin had said. “It should work, in theory. But between the wards always up around Y/N’s house, this spell, and the venom in his system, his body might now be able to take it. It’s just a game of chance, unless we can find some way to take some stress off of his body.”

They all looked to Jaemin again.

“Is there some way to break the wards that he has up?” Yuta asked.

“I don’t think so,” Jaemin said, frowning. “Not without taxing him further. We definitely can’t affect this spell without killing him, and as far as the transformation goes, we’d need to be able to get to his body in there. That’s obviously not happening either.”

“So what can we do?” Donghyuck’s voice was small and he sounded almost repentant, as though he thought this whole thing was his fault. It sort of was, but it was odd to hear that tone from him.

“We ask Ten what he can see of the future and go from there,” Jaemin said. “There’s not much else that we can do, unless anyone knows someone better with spells than Y/N.”

The whole group shook their heads. Spells could be cast by any human variant creature that they knew of, but spellcraft was a human specialty. You in particular were gifted beyond what they had seen in a very long while.

While they thought about it, Ten burst forth from the trees down the street and ran towards their group. He slowed down as he took in the blob, now pressing against the wards that contained it. Jaemin could feel a subtle sort of pressure in his head as his spells kept the goop within Yuta’s plot.

“So?” Ten asked Jaemin as he walked up. “Did it work?”

“We’re not sure. He’s not dead, or the Fire Away spell would have gone small and liquidy again. On the other hand, none of us know any way to get him out, and Kun-hyung’s worried about the toll that all of this” - he waved his hands at the blob - “will kill him while he turns. We wanted to ask what you were seeing as of now.”

Ten closed his eyes, most of his tentacles going still as he focused. There was one that whacked anxiously against the dirt beneath him, beating a steady rhythm against the earth. After a few minutes, his eyes opened and he refocused his eyes on the group around him.

“Well?” Yangyang prompted when he didn’t speak. Ten sighed.

“Good news is that he’s probably not going to die.”

“And the bad news?”

“He might die.”

“What do you mean, Ten-hyung?”

“I can’t… I can’t tell which future is the one that will come true. It’s like there are two possible ways for the future to go, and neither of them is solid. Either he makes it through, or he dies. The worst part is that I can’t tell what causes his death. It could happen two seconds from now, or two hours, or two days. I just don’t know.”

“I don’t remember your visions ever having two outcomes,” Kun said, brows furrowed.

“I haven’t ever had one like this.”

“Well,” Jaemin said, “I’ll just stay here until he wakes up.”

“And where should I go?” asked Yuta. “Maybe nobody told you, but this is my house that just got burned down.” He threw a glare at Hyuck and Yangyang.

“Go stay with Mark-hyung or something. You sleep over with him all the time anyway,” Donghyuck suggested, and Yuta grinned, a complete change from two seconds before.

“He’ll hate that. See you guys later!” He skipped a few steps before running full tilt, phone in his hands and fingers tapping. The glow of the screen disappeared quickly from Jaemin’s view, and he turned back to their now-smaller group.

“Are you sure that you want to stay here until Y/N wakes up?” Kun asked Jaemin. “I know that you don’t need sleep or anything, but that seems like a waste of time.”

“I have eternity,” Jaemin told him. “I just need to be here to watch it deflate, whether it’s because he’s turned or because…” His voice went weak. He couldn't see you die. He just couldn’t. Kun patted him on the shoulder.

“Okay. We’ll come check on you tomorrow.” As he walked away with Yangyang and Donghyuck, Jaemin heard Kun’s ‘mom voice’ come out as he lectured on the dangers of playing with fire. It made Jaemin smile a little.

His head was starting to feel uncomfortable with the pressure of his wards, so he carefully widened them, centimeter by centimeter, until there was less gloop on them. He couldn’t keep this up until you completed the transformation, he knew, but it would work for now. Maybe he could call Kibum-hyung tomorrow for help.

Until then all he had to do was sit and wait, and look at your form encased in neo pearl champagne colored jello.

☽༓☾

It was exactly twenty five hours, forty minutes, and nine seconds since Jaemin had first settled in when the goop started deflating. The hard casing that had developed collapsed in on itself when the slightly softer insides began to shrink, reminding Jaemin slightly of Honey Lemon and her chemical reactions in Big Hero 6. He sprang to his feet, rushing forward to where he could see the outline of your body inside the collapsing bubble, grabbing the empty decanter that the goop had once been held in. He scooped up the small oozing goop that remained from the spell and plugged the decanter, turning around slowly to look at your body once more.

As your still-limp body collapsed to the ground, Jaemin felt his unbeating heart sink. You didn’t move, there was no rise and fall to your chest. There was no sound of your breath in the air. Your eyes didn’t roll around under your eyelids. You seemed… corpselike. Dead. But it couldn’t be. Ten had said that you would probably survive! Jaemin opened his phone and pressed Ten’s contact to call it. He answered on the third ring.

“Jaemin? What’s up?”

“Ten-hyung,” Jaemin said, and his voice cracked. He cleared his throat before continuing. “Y/N… I think, is dead?”

Ten sucked in a breath, audible even through the phone. “Jaemin I’m so sorry-”

Jaemin cut him off. “Hyung, you said he would make it!”

“There was always that chance that he wouldn’t-”

“But you said-” Jaemin’s voice cracked again and he fell into silence. He couldn’t cry, and he had never wished he could until now. Tears might convey the hole in his chest, the emptiness of his existence without your life to partner him.

“Jaemin,” came Ten’s voice, and it was soft, delicate. “I’m so so sorry. I thought that he would make it, but there was always that second path. I can’t-” He took a deep breath. “I can’t see him anymore. I think… I think he might be gone.”

“No!” Jaemin exclaimed hotly. “He can’t be!”

“Jaemin-”

He hung up. Whatever Ten-hyung had to say wouldn’t help. It wouldn’t bring you back. He was along now, with your body and this stupid Flame Away Goop that had managed to take your life despite Ten’s prophecies and Jaemin’s best efforts. The person that you were was gone. Now you were just a still corpse, a painful reminder of what could have been and what should have been and what couldn’t be.

“I’ll give you a proper funeral,” Jaemin told your body as he lifted it into his arms gently. “I promise.”

☽༓☾

For the next three days, Jaemin worked non-stop. He prepared a funeral for you, ignored everyone except to invite them to the event. He could still picture your smile, the way he had to support you those first few steps. He remembered how you had called him gorgeous, how you had said I love you in Gaelic to him without knowing what it meant. He recalled the trust you had for him despite his own occasional self-loathing, the way you had reminded him of his worth every time you were around him.

He missed you. He missed you a lot.

People had called him, came knocking once an hour. He eventually just shut off his phone so he didn’t have to hear their pleas for him to let them in. All of his hyungs and all of his noonas came to make sure he was okay, but would he ever be? There was a Y/N shaped hole in him that he didn’t think could ever be filled up again. Jeno came around three times a day with hug offerings, but Jaemin shut him out. He knew it hurt his friends, knew they only wanted to help, but you were gone and nobody understood. Nobody had loved you the way he had. Nobody had your blood quite literally on their hands, flowing through their veins.

It hurt to think about that. He “lived” while you were dead; he had gained life through your death and that was the most ironic thing. In his attempt to save you, he may have killed you.

He hurt.

On the fourth day since your death, Jaemin gently dressed your body in the best clothes he could find, brushed your hair, and put you in a casket, standing you in an open clearing, the one where he had tried to send you back to Earth. It was the largest clearing nearby, and all of the vampires that had met you plus Ten came to pay their respects. They spoke about the short time they had known you, and the strong impact you had made despite that. They told of how you had gone back to Earth and suffered until you had returned. They told of your feats practicing witchcraft and most of all they spoke of your kindness, the lack of repulsion towards them. They spoke of your kind smile and the way you had fit in so nicely with their community.

Jaemin started not-crying, as vampires did, and he thought he would be alone, but Jeno joined him. Lucas joined him. Jisung and Chenle joined him. Ten and Johnny joined him. He was not the only one who had loved you. Donghyuck joined him. Yangyang and Yuta and Kun joined him. He was not the only one who felt that your death was his fault.

Jaemin was not the only person who choked out their words in an imitation of crying. Jaemin was not the only person who missed you. Jaemin was not the only one who wanted you back. Jaemin was not the only one.

He hadn’t realized how much he missed his friends until they surrounded him in a huge hug. It wasn’t a warm hug, necessarily, but it was a hug nonetheless and made him feel better. He was not the only one.

He was still dealing with the hole in his chest, but he had others to patch himself up with now. Like each person who had known you could bring a part of you back through their memories of you. It was nice, almost.

☽༓☾

The first thing you realized was that you could hear again. Your ears were uncovered, and you vaguely registered words being choked out somewhere near you. It sounded like a large number of people were very sad about something. You wondered what it could be. The second thing you realized was that you were laying down on some sort of padded… thing. It felt like too much work to open your eyes, so you felt around and realized that you were in a padded box. A padded box? That was new.

You tried to sniff the air and were met with the smell of cologne, not too strong but apparently on enough people that it permeated the air. You got hints of perfume too, but it was far less strong. Something in the box shifted and you felt breaths on your face. Were people looking at you in your sleep? Come to think of it, why were these many people around you while you slept at all? That seemed sort of rude. You tried to remember getting here but came up blank. Your last memories were of the pain before you passed out. You shivered at the memory.

“He’s awake!” someone shouted. The noise hurt your ears after the deafening silence of your previous state, and you itched to get away from them. A murmur of sound rolled through the room and then a familiar scent invaded your senses, that of sun-warmed earth.

“Y- Y/N?” Jaemin asked hesitantly. “Can you hear me? Are you in there?”

He sounded absolutely wrecked, like his voice had been stripped of his usual honey and sunshine. You tried to open your eyes, but it was too bright and you just couldn’t, so you nodded slightly.

“Oh my- Y/N,” he continued. “Can’t you open your eyes for me, please?”

You shook your head no.

“Okay, that’s fine, sweetheart. Let me get you out of there.” There was the sound of something wooden being bonked against a wall, but that faded in comparison to the name. Sweetheart. Sweetheart.

You were lifted gently from your padded box and carried somewhere shady and cold. It felt nice against your skin. He felt nice against your skin. He carried you gently, like you were made of glass, but you felt surprisingly strong, just out of sorts. As though while your mind struggled to catch up, your body had strengthened. It was a very different sensation to that of your first time waking up in Jaemin’s house. He walked you through what you thought must be the forest for a bit before he sat down and nestled you into his side. You felt as though some muscles should be unhappy about the position, but you felt completely comfortable.

“Y/N.” Jaemin’s voice came to you, soft and warm and familiar. It was shaking slightly. “Can you open your eyes for me now?”

You focused on your eyelids, raising them slowly until you could see Jaemin. He had on a suit; black jacket over a white shirt, accented by a thin black ribbon tied loosely around his neck. His pink hair fell neatly in waves over his forehead and you reached up to brush away a piece that had fallen over his eyes, smiling.

“Hey Jaem. What happened?” Your voice wasn’t weak, like you supposed it should have been. It came out like a melody into the air, and you marvelled internally at the sound of it, how smooth it was. It felt nice.

“You-” Jaemin broke off for a second, rearranging your limbs next to him. “You were trying to save Yuta’s house. We had to rebuild part, but it’s fine. He stayed with Mark for a few days. For the most part, your spell worked. But then, it- it swallowed you. I got there in time to watch as you were absorbed by this green goop and I thought I was too late. I bit you, back here.” He brushed his fingers gently over the sides of your neck and you shivered. “But you didn’t wake up… I thought I was too late. You weren’t breathing, and you weren’t awake… I have no idea how you managed to cancel the spell without waking up or dying. So I-” He made a choked up sound and tightened his arm around your shoulders. “We’re at your funeral. Ten couldn’t see your future anymore, so we thought you were dead…” He trailed off.

“Wow,” you said. “I died? Then how am I here now? I feel alive?”

“It worked. It must have. You don’t have a heartbeat, but you’re awake. I don’t know what happened exactly, but you must be a vampire now.”

“Huh. I thought I’d feel more… hungry.”

He laughed. It glittered over your ears and you smiled, an involuntary reaction to him. “It’ll kick in, don’t worry.”

“What about the others? I mean, Lucas and Kun and everyone? Are they just at my funeral right now? Without me?”

“Oh.” Jaemin looked as though he had forgotten about them. “I guess they are. Let’s go see them?”

“Let’s.”

☽༓☾

After that day, it didn’t take you long to realize that the other vampires were purposefully putting you with Jaemin for just about everything. On days where you went to hang out with Lucas, he would ask you how Jaemin was doing. If you didn’t know, he would suggest that you go and visit him. Kun asked you to make sure that Jaemin was feeling okay. Yuta, who you were finally allowed to meet and hang out with, constantly suggested that you should spend more time with him. It was strange. Nobody had seemed to mind that you had your own hobbies before your transformation, but now that you were a vampire, it was as though you were meant to be with Jaemin all of the time. You asked Lucas about it once you got sick of the mysterious treatment and he looked at you heavily.

“When you got trapped in that goopy stuff, Jaemin went all weird. He didn’t move for, like, more than 24 hours, and once he thought you were dead… he didn’t talk to any of us until the funeral. We worry about him, and you seem to make him really happy, so we’re trying to keep you two around each other.”

You didn’t really know what to say to that, so you chose the very eloquent “oh,” as your response. Lucas chuckled.

“I know. It was really weird, I’ve never seen him like that. I think we’ve seen a lot of new sides of Jaemin since you came along.”

“Is that a good thing?”

“It’s… well, I don’t think it’s bad or good. It just is. You affect him differently than anyone else we know.”

“Why is that, do you think?”

“Y/N, you idiot, he’s in love with you.”

“He’s what?”

Lucas sighed. “He’s in love with you.”

“Why do you think that? This is Jaemin we’re talking about here. Jaemin. He’s, like, beauty incarnate and he’s smart and kind and wonderful in every aspect of everything. He just can’t be in love with me.”

“He’s in love with you.”

“He’s not.”

“He is.”

“He can't be.”

“Why not?”

“I just told you why.”

Lucas sighed again, more deeply. “But you’re in love with him.”

“I-” You consider that. “I guess?”

“That wasn’t a question.” He rolled his eyes.

“Do you think it’s possible that he actually does like me back?”

“Yes.”

Somehow, after that, Lucas managed to steer the conversation onto other subjects and you refocused on those things, but it echoed in your head. He’s in love with you.

☽༓☾

Even with this new information bouncing around the forefront of your brain, you still had to go and spend time with Jaemin. Maybe it was a little strange for your thoughts to short circuit when you saw him, the little whisper of what if in your head. Maybe it was a little peculiar for a vampire such as yourself to stutter through sentences because you were busy thinking about what life would be like if he really did like you back. Maybe you spent less time talking on your walks together because you wanted to lay next to him in a clearing and watch the clouds instead. Just maybe.

If Jaemin noticed any of your strange behaviour, he didn’t call you out on it. He either really wasn’t paying all that much attention, or he knew enough about you to know that you wouldn’t want him to pry. It was strange, really, how well you knew each other in such a short time. You supposed that since you spent so much time together it wasn’t improbable, but he knew you nearly as well as your old human friends back home.

Thinking about your old memories was a strange experience. You could remember everything as clearly as your human self could, but you noticed more the lack of detail within the images, the way your human eyes couldn’t move as fast as your vampire ones, and your reflexes weren’t as fast, and the way you fixated on one part of the picture without taking in the details of the rest of your vision. You had entirely blocked out memories of driving, they were too harrowing. You recalled more easily now all of the times you had nearly hit something or someone, and while you couldn't die now, at least not that easily, you could have easily fallen prey to the fatal blind spot more times than you’d care to admit.

When you told Jaemin about that, he laughed that laugh you loved so much. “I was born in fourteen forty-two, Y/N. We didn’t have cars back then. The only thing on the street that would run me over was a horse-drawn carriage.”

“Well,” you retorted, “you should consider yourself lucky then. Carriages and horses don’t sound half so bad as giant hunks of metal flying at each other at eighty miles per hour.”

“Maybe you’re right,” he mused, stroking an imaginary beard. “Maybe I was lucky to be born in Korea during the 1400s. You may have heard of the emperor Sejong the Great? I was born during his rule. He was one of the best emperors Korea ever had, he introduced hangul and united the country under Confucian principles so that there was more love for the country and the people living in it. Peaceful few years we had there, from what little I remember. After that, though? Lots of killing, children on the throne, et cetera et cetera. Not so fun. And I was actually able to die through all of that, so that wasn’t pleasant. But then King Sejo, the one who did the killing, actually did a pretty okay job of ruling the country and we had a few more years of prosperity. He died six years after my transformation. I missed that event because I was here in Vahmpyr getting to know Jeno, who turned me.”

“How much of the group was around, at that point?”

“Well…” Jaemin closed his eyes briefly in thought. “Here, let me draw you a family tree.” He grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil and wrote ‘Moon Taeil’ at the top. “Okay so as you know, Taeil is here as the first of us. He turned Yuta-hyung, Kun-hyung, Johnny-hyung, and Taeyong-hyung.” He wrote in their names under Taeil’s, spacing them out across the paper.

“Yuta-hyung turned Sicheng-hyung and Shotaro; Kun-hyung turned Dejun-hyung and Lucas-hyung; Johnny-hyung turned Jungwoo-hyung and Mark, and Taeyongie-hyung turned Hyuck, Doyoung-hyung, and Jaehyun hyung.” He labeled all of these names, then drew more stems leading from Jaehyun, Lucas, and Dejun.

“Jaehyun-hyung turned Sungchan, Lucas-hyung turned Hendery-hyung and Yangyang, and Dejun-hyung turned Renjun.” He drew all of these connections and stemmed Renjun’s name down even farther.

“Renjun turned Jeno and Chenle, then Jeno turned me, and I turned Jisung and now you.” He finished the tree with a flourish, black ink stark against the creamy paper. They were all connected, in some way, to Taeil’s venom. And there was you, at the very bottom, your name small next to Jisung’s.

“You guys are all so… connected.”

“Yep! We’re all one big family.”

“Do you guys have, like, family reunions? And who changed Joy and her friends? Or what’s-his-face? Taemin?”

“We don’t really all get together a lot, just because most of us have jobs on Earth or spend our days doing stuff on our own. Some of them like having flings all the time. Obviously none of us can get STDs or get pregnant, so they can do that, no strings attached. We sort of hang out in our individual groups for the most part, and then hang out every once in a while. As far as the others, we think that they must have come from the same person as Taeil-hyung, a very very old vampire. There are other stories like ours across Vahmpyr, where one vampire created one member of each coven and let us grow from there. The difference is that some of them actually have good relationships with those older vampires, whereas I’ve never met ours. I’ve heard that there’s a man called Park Jae-sang who actually comes around to spend time with the vampires he’s changed. The closest we have to an old vampire is Leeteuk-hyung, and he isn’t really around much, plus he’s not that much older than Taeil-hyung.

“Anyway, to answer your question, when I was turned, nearly everyone was around already. Only Yangyang, Sungchan, Shotaro, Chenle, and Jisung are younger than me. And now you.”

“Wow, so you had to meet everyone right after your transformation? I bet that was chaotic.”

“It was, but it was also fun. I got to be the baby for a while. Then the others came around and I somehow became a mother figure.”

You laughed. Jaemin was a mother figure, for sure. He liked to take care of the people around him, including humans that his brothers had brought home for him to patch up. “That doesn’t surprise me one bit.”

He giggled along with you, that laugh you adored so much, and grinned. “I guess it sort of fits me, doesn’t it? Mother Jaem.” He rolled the name over his tongue and you collapsed into laughter again. “I think that works well, yep.”

The next few days, you called him Mother Jaem, and everyone gave you weird looks, but it made Jaemin laugh hard enough that it was worth it.

☽༓☾

One day after this, Chenle pulled Jaemin aside to ask him what on Earth was going on with this whole “Mother Jaem” thing. Jaemin explained happily how it had come about. Chenle rolled his eyes dramatically.

“When are you two getting married?”

Jaemin just gave him a blank stare. “What?”

“It’s so disgusting how much you guys love each other! When can we shove you two together in a house and call it a day?”

“Um, okay, first of all, that is not how you get rid of somebody. Second, he doesn't love me? And third, there is definitely not enough space in his house for me, even if he did.”

Chenle pinched the bridge of his nose. “Lucas was right, you guys are blind fools. Of course he loves you! He goes to see you all the time! And enjoys it! You’re both in love with each other and both of you are cowards.” He ran his hand through his hair, knocking a piece into his eye. He squinted unhappily but didn’t try to move it.

Jaemin sighed as he got the chunk of hair away from Chenle’s eye. “This is Y/N we’re talking about though! He might hate me for everything I put him through and only stick around because I turned him or something. Plus, he spends as much time with Lucas as with me.”

“My God, your logic is terrible. You love him, he loves you, you need to get together. Watch some dramas and kiss him in the rain or something. Lucas even told me that he loves you!”

“That’s astonishingly specific for someone who doesn’t have a romance under their belt.”

“That’s besides the point!” Chenle grabbed the sides of Jaemin’s face and held him still while he spoke. “You need to confess sometime or another before the rest of us go crazy watching you run in circles around each other.”

With that he stalked away, leaving Jaemin rubbing his face where Chenle’s fingertips had pressed into the skin. It didn’t hurt, but the echoes of his voice and his fingers held Jaemin still for a long time afterwards.

☽༓☾

The next week, Kun and Taeil invited the whole coven to a reunion at Kun’s country estate. Having never been, you looked forward to seeing the giant house as much as meeting the rest of the family. It didn’t disappoint, it was absolutely massive, at least four or five floors and extensive gardens in front. Kun gave you free run of the place, asking you to please not enter rooms marked with a “Do Not Enter” sign. Simple rule to follow. You entered the main hall first, feeling like royalty in such an elegant room. Twin staircases led from the upstairs, leading your eyes to an extravagant chandelier covered in hundreds of crystals, and a mint green ceiling. From either side of the large room extended hallways with lush pale blue rugs and endless vases on platforms. It felt as though you had entered the past, or maybe a very expensive movie set. You moved through hallways and rooms, gazing at velvet chairs and old paintings that screamed money. You wondered if someone in Vahmpyr painted them, or if they were from Earth. You found only two rooms marked “Do Not Enter,” one of which was in a long hallway of bedrooms, so you assumed it was Kun’s.

The other was in the back of a positively colossal library. The library caught your eye because of the sheer size of it. Rows upon rows of books lined the walls and seemingly endless freestanding shelves. It was as large as the main public library back home, taking up at least four average rooms worth of space per floor. Not to mention the height. You estimated that it was at least three floors high, perhaps four. An entire long wall was devoted to Kun’s studies in medicine, dating back to leeches and poultices on open wounds through Magnetic Resonance Imaging and the most advanced of current surgeries. He had records of patients stacked by century, and a desk that popped out of the wall to reveal his own notes on developing vaccines and other medicines. Had you still been human, you were certain that a room like this would have given you a headache, from the size and the amount of books to look at.

From the medicine section you moved to other sciences like forensics, geology (although that section was considerably smaller), and astronomy. You also discovered an entire section on aviation. In the astronomy section, you found cork boards with maps pinned to them, stars drawn in detail, space stations built for both humans and vampires, and more drawings you didn't know how to interpret. You pulled out a few books at random and flipped through them, smiling at the notes in the margins. Past those sections were books on every type of science you had ever heard of, and some you hadn’t.

Beyond those were histories, and Kun’s travel section. He had bins filled with brochures, maps, and travel magazines and accounts of, from what you could tell, every war known to have occurred past Kun’s turning. That blended into social studies, and you found books on language next to copies of the Bible in seemingly every version, translations of the Quran, and more religious texts. Stock market trends were recorded and stored next to books on how to hire smart and anthropology. Cultural studies were stored with ethics and political records. Newspapers appeared as well, although those were fewer than the books by far. They appeared to be from a singular area, a place called Taining County, in China. Kun must have some sort of tie to it. You made a mental note to ask him when you rejoined the others.

You climbed a staircase to the second floor, where you found a fireplace and sitting area within the books. It appeared that the entire second floor was books organized by language, starting each section with children’s books and working their way up to novels. You found all of the Romance Languages, German, Hindi, Greek, Tagalog, Russian, Dutch, Japanese, Cantonese, Thai, Korean, Arabic, Bengali, Telugu, Tamil, Urdu, Latin and more that you didn’t know. In the back was a small compilation of different countries’ sign languages, as well.

You climbed the next flight of stairs to the third floor, finding the fiction section. These were organized by genre, with horror on one shelf, science fiction hogging four shelves on the opposite walls, romance taking up a large section next to that, et cetera. You spotted a section marked “Transcribed” and walked over to it, finding books handwritten by Kun, presumably taken from other forms and written over to fit in his library. You imagined the wax tablets and stone slabs of old books and shuddered. Even as a vampire, transporting those wouldn’t be easy. This floor was open in the middle, looking down at the second. Above you, the next floor was open as well and housed more shelves.

You walked up the last staircase and came upon a musical archive. There were phonographs on tables next to more recent record turntables, followed by cassette players and CD players. Each one was in impeccable condition, and behind them were shelves of every format that would work with those machines. These were shorter shelves, since the music was thinner than books, but there were still many many of them. You saw cassette boxes labeled with the albums contained within, records in yellowed sleeves, and CDs in thick storage cases. They were organized by decade, with the earliest dating back to the late nineteenth century. You guessed that was when recorded music had been invented. Perhaps Kun could still remember older pieces though; something else you would have to ask him about. You were looking through the most recent music to see what he liked and if you had heard of it when you heard someone calling your name.

“Y/N? Where are you?”

“In the library, fourth floor!” you yelled back.

“Will you come back to the kitchen and help me with this?”

“Sure!”

You weren’t sure who was calling you, but it sounded like Lucas, so you ran towards the kitchen. You weren’t sure entirely why there was a kitchen, since you all drank blood anyway, but you figured there was a good reason. You added that to your growing list of things to ask Kun. You understood why you had a kitchen in your house since you had lived in it while you were still human, but Kun hadn’t been to Vahmpyr before he was turned as far as you knew. Besides, he usually lived in his apartment next to the other guys. Maybe it was just necessary to have a kitchen in a house, you didn’t know. It would have felt weird, you guessed, to live in a house without one.

When you arrived, Lucas was outside as you had guessed.

“Will you run in and grab these things for me?” he asked, handing you a sticky note. “I’ve been tasked with rounding up everyone else.”

“Yeah, no problem,” you replied, walking through the doors into the room. It was industrial, like Kun cooked for dozens of people at a time, and there was a surprising amount of cooking utensils that wouldn’t work on raw bodies, like spatulas. You looked down at the sticky note for the first time. If you don’t confess, it read, I will smack you when you come back out. And you know how big my hands are, I will make it hurt.

“What?” you murmured to yourself as Jaemin walked into the room.

“Oh hey Y/N, did Chenle send you?”

“No, Lucas did. But did Chenle perhaps give you a sticky note with things to get for him on it?”

Jaemin glanced down at a hot pink slip of paper in his hand. “Yeah.” He looked back up at you before his brow furrowed and he looked more thoroughly at the writing on it. He groaned. “I am going to kill Chenle.” He ran a hand through his cotton candy pink hair. “I guess I should just get it over with then.”

He walked closer to you, setting the sticky note on the counter as he came. “I’m kind of in love with you? And I have been for a while? I mean I get if you hate me after everything I put you through, but according to Chenle you like me back? And… yeah?”

You were left speechless. Hate Jaemin? Never. And he… loved… you?

“Y/N? Are you okay?” Jaemin waved a hand in front of your face. “I’m sorry, I’ll go, Chenle must have set up a prank.” He started walking away and you grabbed his wrist.

“Jaem, hold on. I’m just in shock. I thought there was no way you could like me back…” Your voice got steadily smaller until it trailed off at the end of your sentence as a whisper.

His entire face lit up like a Christmas tree plugged in for the first time, glowing and cheerful. “It’s not a prank?”

You rubbed a hand over your face. “No, it’s not a prank. I thought Lucas was kidding when he said you liked me back. Or at least that he was wrong. You- you’re actually telling me that you’re in love with me?”

“I am.”

“Holy shit.”

He laughed, a ringing sound in the quiet of the kitchen. It echoed back at you as though the happiness of the laugh had been multiplied. “They’re going to be so smug,” he muttered.

“Oh yes they are. We’re going to have to get back at them someday.”

“Well, we have forever,” he reminded you. You grinned and held out your hand. He took it.

“Let’s go get the teasing over with then.”

You walked out of the kitchen and down the hall. “What did Chenle threaten you with if you didn’t confess?” you asked.

“Oh, he was going to tell the group about the fling I had with Jeno when we were younger.”

You looked at him in shock. “You had a fling with Jeno? Why would you choose me over him?”

“It was just sexual attraction. While that works for some people, both of us were happier just being friends, so we ended it. I actually am in love with you, which makes all the difference. Anyway, Chenle got that story out of me on a dare once and has held it over my head ever since.”

“I wonder if he’s told Jeno he knows?”

“Probably.”

You had reached the front room, and you took a deep breath as you walked forward, though it did nothing for your undead body. “Let’s throw ourselves to the wolves.”

As you walked out into the sunlight, a cheer rose up that would have sent birds flapping away, had there been any. You heard Chenle’s unique laugh paired with Lucas’ happy shouts of “yes!” and the voices of the other men you had gotten to know, paired with ones you didn’t. They stood in a group in the garden, whooping and throwing up hats if they had any. Lucas was the first to reach you.

“I can’t believe you actually did it! I thought I’d have to smack you!” He sounded far too happy at the prospect for your liking.

The rest of the boys ran over. There was a repeating round of “finally” until someone mentioned the food getting warm and there was a great rush to get back to the patio in the garden. You sat next to Jaemin in patio chairs as the sun slowly sank past the tree line and talked with friends old and new.

There was something new, something warm inside of you. A feeling of belonging more than ever when Jaemin fed you a little and the rest of the guys booed jokingly. Under the rising stars you kissed him for the first time, a quick peck at the behest of Yangyang. There were more cheers and hugs and someone had a polaroid camera out, the flash lighting up the scene as everyone laughed.

This was where you were meant to be.

End.

!!Reblogs and feedback are much appreciated!!

All rights reserved kiri-ah, 2021

[phantaloon-books]

Alright I got a couple comments asking for a continuation so here's part 2 of neil finding out the feds were onto smth when they recommended witness protection program

part 1

(Also thank you so much, I genuinely didn't expect such a good reception, everything I write is purely self indulgent)

Andrew is gonna fucking lose it. It's been over three weeks and not a single word from Neil fucking Josten. He's never hated him more, and this time he means it when he says hate. Actually he's not sure he hates himself or Neil more, but he feels hatred and rage and that's what matters. But of course the rabbit just left. Once a rabbit, always a rabbit.

He wanted so desperately to believe that, that Neil chose to run, that he chose to leave him them and keep running because that's what he knows best. Even if believing Neil chose to leave hurts him more than he'll ever admit, it's the best thing to believe. It's best to believe that Neil left than to believe something happened. It's best to believe Neil grew tired and bored of him them than to listen to the worry and dread Andrew's been feeling for months. It's best to believe Neil didn't want him than to let himself think of worst case scenarios.

But he can't make himself think that Neil left willingly and because he wanted to (and not it's not because he wants to believe that Neil wouldn't leave him). Neil would never run without his things, not without his stupid binder and money and contacts, not without clothes or any resources. If he ran away he would do it properly. He wouldn't leave with running clothes and his stupid flip phone. And most importantly Andrew knows that Neil has been restless lately. He's seen the way Neil checks every corner or every place, observes the people, looks for threats. He'd left those habits behind, so something has to have happened. Neil didn't just leave him.

The best thing is the other foxes aren't convinced Neil would run either. He had no one to run from, and he had a family now. And even if he was feeling overwhelmed or anxious, he would have come back. He wouldn't have taken three weeks. So they know, they know, Neil didn't leave because he wanted or needed to. And they're all anxious as hell about that bc if he didn't leave where is he?

They narrow it down eventually, and conclude that he got in a fight and is dead in a ditch somewhere, he had an accident in a coma in a hospital somewhere, he somehow got lost and/or lost his memory, someone killed him accidentally or not and his body is buried somewhere far away, or he's been taken. And Andrew cannot take the stress that he doesn't know where the fuck Neil is any longer.

He almost killed Kevin and several federal agents when Neil went missing for a few hours. This time, he hasn't tried to kill anyone yet but that hasn't stopped him from tearing every dorm apart and the stadium and the police station and the hospital and getting in fights with the FBI. He's desperate enough that he called Browning, hell, he's desperate enough that he contacted the Moriyamas, which wasn't a pleasant experience, but Ichirou had promised Neil protection and this definitely called for mafia intervention. So far neither the FBI or the Moriyamas had helped - yes they had, they informed him regularly that they were looking for Neil, but they had nothing, no clues no trails, and Andrew couldn't believe their incompetence, like for fucks sake the Moriyamas were yakuza, they ought to know what could have happened to one of their most valuable assets. And anyway if he ran, and wasn't taken, they for sure would be behind him, looking to kill him of course, but they still couldn't find him.

Andrew hasn't tried to kill anyone yet but he will soon if he doesn't find Neil, and he's sure he will start with himself. He can't remember the last time he slept or ate well, or went to exy practice, but he doesn't care. He can't care until he knows something. The lack of knowledge is driving him crazy. At this point knowing that Neil is dead and has been rotting in the countryside of Poland would be better than not knowing anything.

He hates this so much. He hates Neil for disappearing. He hates whoever went and got him. He hates the Moriyamas for not being able to find him and not keeping him safe in the first place. He hates himself for becoming so attached. He should have known better. He knew better. He knew it was a bad idea to feel all the things he feels for Neil, especially because it's Neil, the unpredictable rabbit. But he fell for the fake hope that they would make it, that he wouldn't be hurt again, that Neil would stay. He knew letting someone in again could kill him. He knows that if they don't find him, it will. He can't keep going like this. He was stupid enough to feel hopeful, but he won't be able to live once the hope dies.

He's laying in Neil's bed. He knows it's pathetic, but frankly he doesn't care. Everyday is worse than the last one. He's slipping and when he falls it's game over, he's going to make sure of that. If Neil genuinely cared, he'd be pissed at Andrew for even thinking about this. No he'd be upset, but not pissed, about the fact that he's considering taking his life over this. But he opened the door to feelings, and he won't be able to cope with them and he won't be able to close that door again. He's giving up.

Faint buzzing interrumps his thoughts. Someone's calling him. He couldn't stomach the runaway song that matched with Neil's but he couldn't stomach changing it either, so he leaves in on vibrate now. He looks at his screen. It's an unknown number. Most likely the FBI or the Moriyamas or a random police station ready to take him out of his misery and just tell him they found Neil's body. The code says it's from Minnesota. He considers not answering, but he might as well get over it.

He flips the phone open, "I only care about this if you are from the FBI or the literal mafia, so if you aren't from either, feel free to hang up." The other line stays silent for a few seconds, but when he looks at his phone, it's still going. The person didn't hang up. He doesn't have the patience for this. "I'm just gonna hang up then-"

"Andrew, wait." It's barely a hesitant whisper. The voice is absolutely shattered, rough and hoarse and very painful-sounding. There's wheezing too and labored breaths. But god. No matter how wrecked he sounds, he'd recognize that voice anywhere. In half a second he's up and falling from the bed in his haste, alert at last. He can't believe it. He wants to but he doesn't want to believe the call is real.

"Neil? Neil is that you?" He hates how vulnerable he sounds, but the thought dies quickly. There's no way, no way this is real. A sob breaks through the line, and oh it sounds so full of pain and fear.

"Andrew, I-I need you to stay safe. I don't know if they're coming for you, for the foxes. I need you to find a place where you're safe. Call Browning or Ich- the little Lord and make sure they can protect you guys for a while."

Okay that's definitely Neil even if he didn't answer the question. And Andrew's heart is going a thousand miles an hour, he doesn't feel his body anymore.

"Neil where are you? I'm coming to get you, I'll call Browning but where are you?"

"'Drew," another sob, and this one manages to break Andrew's walls more than than the whispered 'Drew', "promise me you'll stay safe, don't come looking for me, you can't take them down, please don't come looking for me."

The exhaustion and terror in his voice doesn't sit well with Andrew. The Neil he knows is not this. "For fucks sake Neil just tell me where in Minnesota you are, I'm coming to get you."

"No- no you're not, I'm not calling you because I want you to come. I just need you to promise you'll be safe."

"Neil who took you? Where are you? I can send the FBI or the japanese shits over, I swear to god I can send them to come get you if you just tell me where you are and who took you. I'll - I'll try my best to keep the others safe, but who took you?"

"I'm sorry, Andrew, I- I didn't mean to, please believe I didn't mean to leave, they- some of the Butcher's pals found me, I'm so sorry- I put all of you in danger again."

"Okay, that's something we can work with, now where are you Neil?"

"Andrew-" his breath hitches, he gasps and whimpers, "I'm so sorry, I have to go, I need to leave Andrew. Please stay safe. Look I- I love you okay? I'm sorry I didn't say it earlier."

"Neil wait don't hang up-"

And the line goes dead.

The world is falling apart, collapsing all around Andrew. He's numb but he feels encompassing terror. He can't feel a thing, he can't think. He was so close. It feels like Neil just slipped past his fingers, like he just let go of Neil and let him fall to the darkness. He thinks he may be falling too. He needs to call Browning. He does it instinctively, he doesn't register he has his phone to his ear until the FBI agents voice is calling to him. He also goes with what he's gonna say with the same instinct he pulled in Baltimore, knowing he can't mention certain mafia.

"Neil just called me, I have no idea from where, I have no idea how he got a hold of me, he didn't say a thing, he refused to say a thing other than we're in danger, the foxes, and that whoever took him will come for us- oh and apparently it's someone involved with the Butcher."

How he managed to be as apathetic and unattached to everything he said is beyond him. But whatever he says and whatever Browning says, FBI agents are now guarding them in the locker room of the Foxhole Court, with mattresses and mats laid down on the floor. and he doesn't know how they got here and he's cuffed all over again, but this time to Renee even if he doesn't remember being violent. Even the stupid rookies are here, looking extremely panicked and terrified despite most of them not giving a fuck that Neil was gone just hours ago. The other foxes - Neil's family - are pressing Andrew for answers, but he can't deal with anything at the moment.

He needs to call Ichirou too. That's the call that matters, because that's the call that can bring Neil home because he can't do that himself while cuffed to Renee and being guarded by the fucking FBI. He somehow convinces the agent to let him make a call, to his therapist he says, to grant him privacy even if that's utter bullshit. He's dragging Renee into the eye of the storm but oh well, why did they cuff him to her in the first place, it's not his fault. He calls the Moriyama representative he's been dealing with and thank Renee's god the woman answers.

"I need to talk to- to Lord Ichirou, it's about Neil Josten's whereabouts, I got important information about him." He can feel both the condescension from the other end of the line and poorly veiled shock from Renee. "I know where he is, I know about who's got him, I need to talk to Lord Moriyama."

He isn't sure how he managed it. He doesn't know how he convinced them to let them talk to their mafia boss, or how he's able to keep his cool for long enough to actually talk to the man himself. He thinks having Renee there, who asks no questions and keeps her hand on top of Andrew's with no hesitation, is part of the solution but he's not admitting that. Either or, he talks to Ichirou (he can't deny he's not terrified of messing up with the man who keeps Neil alive, but he's not admitting that either), reminds him of how Neil is important to the Moriyamas, both as an exy player and as a Wesninski, and how Neil, Kevin and Jean are loyal to the Moriyamas, hints at how Ichirou promised protection. He has perfect memory, but he will never remember how he convinced Ichirou Moriyama to send people to Minnesota and look for him all over the state and surrounding states, all he knows is that Ichirou stuck to his promise, all is good, he didn't fuck up.

Weeks pass again, nothing happens. There's no news from the Moriyamas, the FBI keeps telling him they're doing what they can. Andrew is done. No one came looking for them at least, which is nice bc they didn't die but it doesn't feel worth it when Neil wasn't back. He feels stupid for hoping he would come back safe and alive. The Moriyamas might as well have killed him for being such an inconvenience. Things are going to hell. Andrew was an idiot for falling so hard for Neil Josten. It was a mistake. He should have known better.

His anger is gone, and numbness has settled. It was becoming a habit for him to remain lying down most of the day. It was also becoming a habit for the foxes to take care of him when he did this. He can't even bother to shower if someone doesn't remind him every day, or eat, or drink water for that matter. He's a mess and he would be incredibly embarrassed if he cared a little, but he's slipping and he doesn't mind falling. Nothing is fine. Until it is.

It comes in the form of a text one morning, while he's lying on the couch in the living room. An unknown number again, New York code, and it only reads, "Threat has been dealt with - I". And what the fuck does that mean. It tells him absolutely nothing. If Ichirou bothered to text him he could at least be clear as to what the fuck that meant. Was Neil even alive? There is a soft knock at the door. Of course, someone bothers him when no other fox is at the dorm. They couldn't ditch every class to make sure Andrew didn't combust spontaneously.

He truly doesn't want to get up. He doesn't want to go answer the door. It's too much a bother. If it's someone important they'll either knock again aor shout for him to open up. He curls up in bed. He honestly wants to disappear. There's another knock, a little harder than the first. But there's no voice, no demand, no nothing. Maybe it's a Moriyama. Maybe he'll feel so disrespected or whatever he's gonna barge in and end his misery. Whatever. "Fuck off", he shouts from the couch, hoping for the best. There's another knock, for fuck's sake, can they just walk in already? Another, and he's up. Pissed and going for the door.

"Fucking hell, what do you want?" His anger is back with a passion, and he's practically stomping to the door, throwing it wide open, "Just barge through the fucking door, and get it over with-"

He has to stop exploding when people don't answer to him right away. Maybe he should work on his patience. Because frankly it has been working against him at the worst times. No it's not his fault. It's the idiot's fault for appearing at out nowhere and stealing his breath away. Everything is Neil Josten's fault.

"Hey Drew," said idiot's voice is impossibly more hoarse than when he called him before. Andrew can't tell if his heart is beating too fast or not at all. He thought he was a mess, but Neil looks like he's been through hell and back. Well, he's been through hell and back too many times before, but he's never looked this bad, and he was a mess after Evermore. His face is beaten so badly, so swollen, if he didn't know him and those stupidly blue eyes so well. Even his eyes are different, there's no spark, they're dull and hazy. He's wearing a large hoodie and sweatpants, so Andrew can't see the damage beyon his face, but at least his hands remain okay, there's no new damage. "Looks like I still have it in me to leave you speechless, huh."

Andrew takes a deep breath and he sighs. And his heart breaks. Neil. Neil. Neil is here. Andrew wants to craddle him and hold him and never let him go again. He doesn't care if it's soft, Neil is here. He raises his hands, frames Neil's face like he has before. He presses a hand to Neil's neck, looking for a pulse, and he finds it. He's alive.

"Neil," he breathes, and he feels. He feels. "You're alive, I thought, you-"

They're both silent. Andrew doesn't notice when Neil raises his hands, framing his own face. They've been here before.

"I'm not leaving you, I promised right? You're not getting rid of me that easily. "

He hates feeling this much, "You've got some explaining to do, but- it can wait."

"That's good yeah, because I'm not sure how much longer I can remain conscious and the Moriyamas weren't the best at patching everything up, so I'd really appreciate it if you call Abby."

He doesn't trust himself to open his mouth, so he guides Neil inside, holding on to his hand like a tether. Neil deflates, he grimaces as Andrew helps him to the couch. He's obviously hiding something below the clothes. Andrew stands to call Abby, but Neil grips his hand tightly. When Andrew looks up, he sees the fear and exhaustion he heard on the call weeks ago. Neil isn't able to keep up the act of being okay for long.

"Stay, pl- just," he looks away, and Andrew doesn't know how to feel about the pause, he didn't say the word, "can you stay?"

And he does. Things aren't fine. Neil is a mess. So is Andrew. They have to work through stuff. Andrew clearly has to work on the apparent dependancy issues. But they'll have time now. Neil is safe. He's alive and safe. He lost consciousness not long after he sat down, but Abby, Wymack and the foxes are on their way. They're not fine. But Neil is lying next to him, and he isn't gonna let him go again. They'll be fine.

[yukinojou]

I already squeed quite a bit on Twitter, but turns out my Shadow and Bone thoughts demand longform. So that was a 40+ tweet thread or using my Tumblr for an original post for once.

I was wary about the Shadow and Bone adaptation the way I'm usually wary about good books being adapted onscreen. It was amplified because my actual favourites are the Six of Crows books, and because the American-based movie complex has a bad track record of doing anything based on Eastern Europe. 8 episodes in 3 days should tell you how much I loved it - the moment I finished, I wanted more.

First, the technical praise:

Damn but the plotting is tight. It took me a while to realised it's based on heist movie bones, where every little thing (The Freaking Bullet!) is important. The story fulfills its promises and manages not to bore at the same time - it delights by the way they're fulfilled. I called out a few plot developments moments before they happened, and I was happy about it. Such a joy after so many series where "not doing what viewers expect" led to plot holes and lack of sense. It might be an upside to the streaming model after all.

From a dramatic point of view I can tell all the reasons for all the changes, especially providing additional outsider points of view on Ravka (Crows) and letting viewers see Mal for themselves the way he only comes across in later books.

Speaking of which, this is a masterclass in rewriting a story draft. SaB was Bardugo's first, and having read later books you can really see where she didn't quite dare to break the YA rules yet, especially Single POV that necessitated a tight focus on Alina's often negative feelings rather than the big picture and a triangle that felt a bit forced. The world in the series is so much bigger, the way Bardugo could finally paint it when SaB success gave her more creative freedom, and some structural choices feel familiar too. It's a combination of various choices by crew and cast, but the end result meshes together so tightly and naturally.

Visuals! Especially the war parts because Every Soviet Movie Ever, but also the clothes (I would kill for Nina's blouse in the bar), the jewelry, the interiors. The stag was so very beautiful. And a deep commitment to a coherent aesthetic for each character and setting.

Look, you can do a serious fantasy series with colours! Both skin colours and bright sets and clothing! And all scenes were well lit enough to know what's going on, even in the Fold!

Representation (aka I Am Emotion)

To start with: I was born behind the Iron Curtain, in the last years of the Cold War. The Curtain was always permeable to some extent, and we have always been aware that while we have talented artists of our own, we never had the budgets and polish of the Anglosphere Entertainment Machine. So we watched a hell of a lot of American visual storytelling especially because yeah, you can tell we don't have the budgets. 90s and 2000s especially, it's getting better now.

In American stories, the BEST case scenario for Eastern European representation is the Big Dumb Pole, the ethnic stereotype Americans don't even notice they use, where the punchline is that his English is bad or that he grew up outside Anglo culture. Other than that, it's criminals, beggars, sex trafficking victims, refugees. Sure, we may look similar (except we really really don't, not if you're raised here and see the distinct lack of all those long-jawed Anglo faces), but we are not and have never been the West, never mind America. It's probably better for younger people now, but I was raised under rationing and passport bans. Star Trek and Beverly Hills 90210 were exactly as foreign to me.

The first ever character I really identified with was Susan Ivanova in Babylon 5 (written by J. Michael Straczynski, yay behind-camera representation). This was a Russian Jewish woman very much in charge, in the way of strong women I know so well, not taking any bullshit, not repressing her feminity. I recognised her bones, she could be my cousin. The sheer relief of it. There have been few such occasions since.

The reason I picked up Shadow and Bone in the first place was recommendations from other Polish people. I've had no problems finding representation in Eastern European books because wow our scene is strong in SFF especially, but it's always a treat to find a book in English that gets it. And Leigh gets it, the bones of our culture, and I could even look past the grammar issue (dear gods and Americans, Starkova for a woman, Morozov for a guy) that really irked me because of the love for the setting and the characters, the weaving in of religion/mysticism (we never laicisized the same way as the West, natch), the understanding of how deep are the scars left in a nation at war for centuries. The books are precious to me, they and Arden's Winternight and Novik's Spinning Silver.

To sum up: Shadow and Bone the Netflix series gets it. You can tell just how much they've immersed themselves in Eastern European culture and media, it comes across so well in visuals and writing and characters. Not just the obvious bits (though the WWII propaganda posters gave me a giggle), but the palaces, the additional plotlines and characters, the costumes, the attitudes. About the only thing missing in the soldier scenes was someone singing and/or quoting poetry.

I will blame the Apparat's lack of beard on filming in a non-Orthodox country. Poland's Catholic too, but I very much imagined him as an Orthodox patriarch, possibly because I read the books shortly after a visit to Pecherska Lavra in Kiev and the labyrinthine holy catacombs there. Small quibble, not my religion, not my place to speak.

(I've seen discussion on the issues with biracial representation in the show, which is visceral and apparently based on bad experiences of one of the show writers in a way that's caused pain to other Asian and biracial people. I'm not qualified to speak on those parts, other that Eastern Europe is... yeah. Racist in subtly different ways. If anything, the treatment of the Suli as explained in Six of Crows always read so very true of the way Roma are treated, and even sanitised.)

And now for the spoiler-filled bits:

Kaz and Inej. I mean... just THEM. So many props to the actors, the writers, the bloody goat.

I adore the fact the only people who get to have sex in the show are Jesper and a very lucky stablehand.

Ben Barnes needs either an award or a kick. The man's acting choices and puppy eyes are as epic as his hair.

So Much Love for Alina initiating the kiss. Her book characterisation makes sense, she's so trapped in her own head because she has no time to process everything that's happening, but grabbing life by the lapels is a much more active choice. Still not making the relationship equal, but closer to it.

Speaking of, Kaz's constant awareness of how unequal his relationship with Inej is, and attempts to give her agency. I'm really curious how his touch issues come across to someone who doesn't know the backstory there.

Feodor and his actor. He looks exactly like the pre-war heartthrob Adolf Dymsza, a specific upper-class Polish ethnic type that's much rarer now that, well, Nazis killed millions of Polish intellectuals in their attempt to reduce us to unskilled labour only. The faces he makes are the Best.

Nina!! Nina is perfect, those cheekbones, that cheek, I was giggling myself silly half the time. I cannot wait to see Danielle Galligan take on the challenge of Nina's plotline in Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom, she'll kill us dead.

I already mentioned that the writers fixed Mal's absence from the first book, but Mal in general! The haircut gives him a kind of rugby charm, and Archie Renaux is outstanding at emoting without talking. Honestly, all the casting in this series is inspired, but him in particular.

Extra bonus: Howard Charles and Luke Pasqualino playing so very much against the type of the swaggering Musketeers I saw them play last. Arken dropping the mask at the end... Howard Charles is love.

I can't believe not only was Milo's bullet a plot point, but the fact Alina was wearing a particularly sparkly hair ornament in a long series of beautiful hair ornaments was a plot point.

In conclusion: so much love, and next three season NOW please. Okay, give me a week to reread the books, and an extra day because new Murderbot drops tomorrow...

[somestansomewhere]

Frank’s Dementia in 11a

Points to discuss:

Moments where Frank forgot.

Things he might be able to remember.

Other characters finding out.

Aftermath...

So to start of, I made a list of every instance in SEASON ELEVEN A, where Frank’s memory seemed a bit off, I’m not gonna analyze the whole series for this but I’m sure there’s more there. Now:

Moments Where Frank Forgot

11x01

1. Frank’s History of Chicago

While this does appear to imply just the opening monologue, there are actually several moments throughout the episode where Frank is talking about the Gallagher’s running Chicago to Alan. And while this seems like typical “Frank being drunk nonsense”, plus a spectacular opening to the season... I now see it in a different light especially after:

2. Frank’s Memory Elixir

Frank LITERALLY has a line asking for “memory elixir”, meaning booze, which Alan hands him. Ironic since he has ALCOHOLIC DEMENTIA. You can’t tell me that wasn’t intentional!

3. He Forgot Bars Were Closed

Now, I may be reaching here... BUT when Frank enters The Alibi for the first time this season (what a grand enterence btw) he says “I heard somewhere all bars were open again”. V responds by saying something along the lines of “three weeks ago maybe” and that the mayor shut them down again. Frank says “Well who the hell can keep track”. And okay, yeah maybe Frank genuinely didn’t know... but this is the bar he goes to EVERYDAY. Not to mention if they shut down less than THREE WEEKS AGO, Frank should know... idk this one might not count but I added it anyway. Kermit is unaware of bars being open/shut down in 11x03 so moving on:

11x02

4. The Alibi’s Secret Enterence

Okay, again REACHING! However, when Frank entered The Alibi through the Keg Zone door he forgot to use the “secret knock” and Kev had to remind him about it. Now in 11x01 he used the front door (and I’m not sure he knew to use the other door in that ep) but still at least he remembered to use the correct door in 11x02.

11x03

This is where it got noticeable.. strap in, here we go:

5. Taking Franny to School

He took her to the wrong school. This is the same person that knows the Southside perhaps better than his kids (lol), like the back of his hand! He not only took her to the wrong school but a middle/grade school. Franny is in elementary/preschool school. You can see in WHM’s face here that Frank was confused...

6. Uncle V and Aunt Kev

Maybe just a comedic slip up, but Frank calls Kev and V “Uncle V and Aunt Kev” as opposed to what they really are. Maybe he forgot? I’m reaching LOL.

7. Debbie Is Not Fiona

Frank talks about one of his favorite MEMORIES with Franny’s mom: Debbie, but “oh no, maybe that was Fiona”. Small moment, typical Frank but... nonetheless, poor memory. The writers are smart by mentioning Fiona in this scene... it’s “a Fiona mention”, we’re going to remember this, and that’s probably why they did it.

8. The Paper Store

Yeah, this was the first red flag for me and if I can recall, the moment EVERYONE knew something seemed off. Frank, walks out of the paper store with Franny and cannot remember where he is, or where they are headed. Once he is reminded of their “goals” for the day (by Franny, a five year old) he proceeds to head to the paper store... Franny once again let’s him know that they already went there and Frank notices the paper already in his (Franny’s) backpack. Ouch.

11x04

9. The Nation of Islam

Ooo this one hurt! After Frank suggests to visit The Nation of Islam in an attempt to get their help to get rid of the Milkoviches, him, Kev, and Liam do. We SEE them go there. It’s a whole scene, so later in the episode when Frank suggests to go ask them for help AGAIN as if it were a completely new idea, we as an audience know they already did that. As Kevin says they “JUST did that”. Frank forgot. Shit.

11x05

10. Mrs.McCurdy

Frank discusses with Kev about murdering Mrs.McCurdy, later he tries to murder her. We see it, we remember it becaue she grabbed Frank’s dick. It was funny, the scene evoked laughter, it forces the audience to remember it. Frank mindlessly walks into The Alibi and Kev asks Frank if he “did the thing”. Now at first Frank is confused. They were using “quotation talk” earlier so yeah I get it, but then when Kevin is more direct with Frank, Frank thinks Kev is implying that he had sex with Mrs.McCurdy... Frank is clearly confused. Only then does Kev point out that he meant MURDER. Frank takes a second, again if you watch he does not know what Kev is talking about, but then it hits him, and he remembers. Thus continuing the convo like nothing.

11x06

11. Monica

Now this one REALLY hurt. Frank’s first scene of the episode is a sex scene between him and Letty. She’s blonde, and Frank calls her Monica. He truly believes he is sleeping with Monica, only Monica is dead, she been since season seven. When Letty mentions that she isn’t Monica (thinking Frank calling her that was only a sex thing), we see WHM’s brilliant preformence once again. Frank doesn’t know what Letty means, he thinks she’s Monica. Then when he realizes she isn’t, he gets this lost dejected look on his face. He’s confused and knows that he keeps getting confused.

Frank says “I gotta get to work”. Letty asks him where he works and Frank is left bewildered.

12. Seven

Okay so remember Frank and Franny’s adventure in 11x03? Frank visits a dry cleaners to get some weed. They make a point of Franny saying that Frank will pay SEVEN for the weed. No offer is made and Frank must get it somewhere else. Throughout the episode Frank refterences SEVEN to Kev & V as the asking price to sell. We as an audience are forced to remember SEVEN. Also in 11x03, as Debbie frantically looks for Frank/Franny, she visits the dry cleaners where they were (retracing their steps). We as an audience have been there twice.

Now, in 11x06 Frank goes to pick up an order but like, we already saw him go there episodes ago. When the woman behind the counter literally tells him she has nothing for him and he argues with her, WE KNOW she is right. Once again, Frank forgot. I’m so sad. Not only that but Kev and V don’t have Frank going on runs anymore. Ian & Mickey are doing it... Frank is legit lost and forgot that he’s not doing that anymore, Kev tells him he’s not in 11x04.

Ms.G even says to Frank that she doesn’t need to write anything down to remember it because the “Mind’s a steel trap”. She doesn’t owe him... she can use her mind to remember where Frank cannot. The irony.

13. Pedestrian, Blue, Handlebar (abc)

a) Frank getting hit in the head results in him having a visit to the hospital where a nurse discovers that Frank has no clue how he got there and more specifically, how he got hit in the first place.

b) The saddest part, when asked his name he remembers FRANK. But has to look down at her sheet to know his last name is GALLAGHER. This is the man who walks around saying “It’s up to Frank Gallagher to save the neighborhood”. He forgot his last name.

c) The scene goes on, the nurse asks him to remember three words: pedestrian, blue, and handlebar. They discuss other things, then she asks him to tell her those words. It’s so abundantly clear that Frank just cannot. He doesn’t remember. He was told like 30sec ago and gets, for the first time ASHAMED. He’s the most shameless person ever (hence the title of the show) but now the tides have turned. He “doesn’t wanna play this game anymore”. Frank can recognize AGAIN that he is confused, only now he is forced to face it. The nurse noticed, she runs some tests and Frank learns that he has early stages of alcoholic dementia. This isn’t his liver, he can’t get a new one, this is his brain.

14. + 15. Letty & Terry

Just two bonuses, Frank wanders aimlessly into the Alibi again (like in 11x05) because it’s routine for him. Letty calls him over. Frank forgot they were supposed to meet there. :(

Frank and Terry on the porch: Maybe it’s just bad writing or they were trying to make a point but like a “Gallagher-Milkovich War” never happened??? We watched the show for 11 seasons... Also are the Milkoviches actually from Poland Frank? I’ll excuse that one cuz Ian mentioned it too, but I thought they wer Ukrainian. These seem like writing mistakes tho so oops.

Things He Might Be Able To Remember

Frank has his and Franny’s name tattooed on his body... he literally forgot his last name at the hospital. And if he forgets a bunch in 11b then that’ll be the payoff for the tattoo... he might not know why the tattoo is there or who the people are listed on his arm, or even what it means exactly, but he will know that Frank loves Franny.

Where he lives. Frank never threw out the paper with his diagnosis. He might remember his home, however the conflict comes in the fact that the Gallaghers might be selling it. He needs to be around people/places that are familiar to him. This could jeopardize his memory.

The Alibi is where Frank seems to just walk to or go to whenever he has no clue where he is or going but it’s subtle. I could see him getting lost and no one knowing where he is and Frank just being at the Alibi beacuse idk muscle memory? He’s on autopilot.

Early stages of ALCOHOLIC Dementia can improve. Like if maybe Frank were to tell someone and if he wasn’t removed from the Gallagher house, and oh I don’t know if Frank STOPPED DRINKING, he could remember. But I don’t think we’re heading in that direction, especially if the house is sold, and let’s face it... it looks that way.

Fiona? Will he forget her... this all feels reminiscent of 4x11.

Other Characters Finding Out

Franny, Kevin, and Liam, are the only people who have REALLY been subject to the possibility of noticing... but think about it. Franny is too young to notice anything, Kevin is not the brightest bulb, he doesn’t seem to realize it either, and Liam was exposed to it once, but at that time he was so scared about the Milkoviches that he didn’t notice it. Maybe if he saw it again, he would. Liam is smart enough.

I wonder if the Gallaghers will just find out the hard way (,like those stills from 11x08 are making me think,) or if anyone will begin to seriously pick up on it. I intially thought they would show Frank forgetting in front of each character until someone was able to notice but scratch that. They seem to be setting Lip up on the “alcoholic path” this season, (and I may go more into depth about that one another time, it’s another big post if I do get into it). But what will the Gallagher’s reactions/feelings be towards Frank’s diagnosis? Mickey and Ian had many Terry/Frank discussions in 11x06 literally setting up for it. It hurt when they all kept dismissing Frank because yup, they don’t know yet. They would have to help him in order to keep his memory maintained, but that’s the thing... Frank’s pride. He might deny their help even if they actually were to give it to him... Either way, I’m “looking forward” to see how this all unravels and how everyone finds out and what their reactions will be, which brings me to my final topic:

Aftermath...

So what happens? Will they sell the house, potentially causing Frank to forget? Will he not know his kids, his history? Will he die? Will Frank finally stop drinking... yeah I doubt that... So what WILL happen? Will the Gallaghers be left to take care of Frank? Will they even do that? Will he remember them?

What if in 1x01 Frank’s narration IS his memory? We see him talking about his kids to someone? It circles back? I don’t know, but either way I expect this whole thing to pull on our heartstrings. When the rest of the regulars find out... it’s gonna get real, and rough.

Interesting stuff coming up in 11b I’m sure. Let’s see how this plays out for our Protagonist and Patriarch: Frank Gallagher.

Omg, if you read through this, you are so cool and I really really appreciate you! Please send me an ask or write a note, I would love to get your take on the matter. 💙

Hope you enjoyed this analysis and I hope it didn’t go on too long.

[ecofinisher]

Lady Frost and the Fire King - A familiar partnership - Chap 11

Chapter 11

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31330631/chapters/77469461

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13886468/11/Lady-Frost-and-the-Fire-King-A-familiar-partnership

https://www.wattpad.com/1081907828-lady-frost-and-the-fire-king-a-familiar

(Chapter is about 5000 words long. I recommend to read inside the previous fanfic links)

Kai and Alfida stood together in front of a library and looked at the description at the entrance about the opening time.

„Okay, this must be it,“ Alfida commented. „Shall we go in?“

Kai nodded, then opened the door to enter along with the girl into the library and looked around the place. Alfida showed Kai the reception, where a woman sat using the computer and the two went to encounter the woman.

„Good morning. We‘d like to know if it‘s possible for someone here to help us look for flight tickets to Paris,“ Kai spoke. „Our grandfather told us this was the only way he knew how to obtain and get information about,“ Kai asked earning a nod from the librarian.

„For your grandfather or for you two?“ Asked the librarian.

„Us two,“ Responded Kai.

„Age?“

„I‘m 15 and she‘s 16,“ Responded Kai.

„17,“ Corrected Alfida making Kai grin embarrassed.

„Okay and does it have to be a non-stop flight or a connecting flight?“

„If possible, the cheapest one,“ Added Alfida. „We gotta pay this on our own, eventually,“

„Alright I‘m looking for you two on Brian Airlines, a low-cost airline if you‘re okay with it,“ Stated the woman making the teens nod.

„There are no available low-cost flights to Paris. You would need to choose another destination and see from there, how you could go there to Paris,“ Responded the librarian.

„Well what more can you want, we‘re at the moment out of money and need to go there to get my sister back,“ Explained Kai earning a nod from the librarian.

„How did you get here, if I may ask?“

„It‘s a long story. We‘re really thankful for your help ma‘am,“

„We really are and I don‘t want to be rude or anything, but what are the prices of the available destinations? Are there close to Paris a bit?“ Asked the raven-haired girl the woman, which used her mouse to open the offers.

„60 Norwegian Kroner is if you fly to Vienna, in Austria. Wroclaw in Poland costs 50 Kroner and to Basle in Switzerland 60,“ Mentioned the librarian looking at the two teens.

„For two persons it‘s actually cheap,“ Kai mentioned glad making his crush nod.

„Oh, that‘s for each person,“ Corrected the librarian. „Each of you pays 50 or 60 bucks. So 100 or 120,“

„Oh…..okay, so looks like we have to stay here for a while and find a way to make some money for our flight,“ Kai mentioned making Alfida nod.

„Yeah, we better start to look for a way to obtain money. Maybe Hendrick has an idea and helps us out,“ Commented Alfida.

„I know I can make money with art, I just need to get myself a painting easel and colors. The issue is I will need money for that as well,“

„I‘m thinking about going to Orm and Hendrick and tell what‘s up. Hendrick mostly, he knows this world at the moment better than us,“

„I think you‘ve got a point,“ Kai agreed, then Alfida thanked the woman and walked along with the boy to the outside of the library. „Hey, should we head back to the troll kingdom and see, if we can unfreeze the others?“ Questioned Kai making Alfida shrug her shoulders.

„We could go and try, yeah,“ Replied the raven-haired. „Let‘s get out of here,“ Called Alfida walking the street up with the short boy.

As the school had ended Rollan was alone in the locker room looking at a small book he has as his agenda to see the homework he had noticed down for the week and stored the books we wouldn‘t need for now inside his locker.

„Ay, it‘s been a long time since I‘ve ever done homework. That looks like a lot than usual,“ Spoke Rollan, then stored his agenda inside his bag and got up to close his locker, then noticed his belt he encountered a few days ago. Rollan took the belt out to look at his initial letter and unlocked the aperture under it and tried to adjust it around his waist. „I…..almost got it,“ Commented Rollan trying to squeeze the thick textile through the bands of his pants. Rollan made it and closed his belt, then noticed the old-goldish tune of his symbol get lighter, making him furrow his left eyebrow and in front of him appeared a stone-creature in the air, then it dropped on the ground and it got split into two and both got up scratching their heads.

„Whoa,“ Rollan commented surprised as seeing the two creatures, then got down at the two. „What kind of creatures are you?“ Asked Rollan about to pat the slink creature, then yelped as he burnt his finger on it.

„Hey, hey, hey. Didn‘t you notice the magma on my head?“ Asked the slink stone creature watching Rollan shove his finger in his mouth. „It‘s hotter, than a day at the beach,“

„I‘m sorry,“ Apologized Rollan. „I was kinda astonished by seeing you two,“

„I‘m glad you‘re thinking that way,“ Commented the round creature. „Hey haven‘t we seen each other once? You‘re pretty familiar to me,“

„Not that I know,“ Responded Rollan. „Why?“

„I felt like I‘ve known you somehow,“ Responded the large stone-creature. „I‘m Coal by the way. You‘ve got a name as well?“

„Of course he does, Coal,“ Commented the slink stone creature, making Coal frown and punch him on his face making him fall down on the ground to split into two, now the third creature was much smaller than the slinker one.

„I‘m Rollan,“ Responded Rollan looking at the third creature, which got up along with the slinky one.

„If we‘re going to be together for the next amount of time. I would really love if I could walk on the ground on my own or be carried by you. Anytime I‘m hit or fall down, I split in two and if they fall as well, you‘ll have it worse than in a rabbit burrow,“ Coal commented seeing Rollan sit down on the bench looking at the trio,

„Can I at least know, why I am here talking to you three? What were you doing in my belt?“

„That‘s an excellent question, for some reason a foreign man mixed my powers into this belt, so I assume this would be a way to have the wielder be able to use the powers,“

„Powers?“ Asked Rollan curious. „What kind of powers?“ Asked Rollan, then he heard a loud noise on the outside of the building and ran at the window to look out and see the feet of a large robot stand there blocking the way to the buildings behind it. „Coal?!?“

„The power of fire“ Responded Coal. „You‘re able to create fire and use it,“

„Really? How can I do so?“ Asked the raven-haired boy. „Do I have to say anything?“

„You‘ll get the hand of it. You just have to transform and you‘ll be able to use the powers,“ Responded Coal watching Rollan look out of the window and hear someone scream, then the robot moved back and Rollan dropped his mouth knowing someone might be in trouble right now.

„Does this make me one of the good people if I use the firepower?“ Asked Rollan making the stone-creature shrug his shoulders.

„I‘m just here to follow your orders. Whatever path you chose, is up to you,“ Responded Coal watching Rollan look out of the window and frown.

„They need a hero? They will get one!“ Announced Rollan earning applause from the three stone-creatures.

„Then all you need to do is say, Coal, I‘m fired up,“ Stated the stone-creature.

„Coal, I‘m fired up! Ah ha, ha!“ Shouted Rollan opening up his arms and have his clothing get replaced by brown boots, pants, that were marked with fire-themed symbols resembling an engravure. On his body he wore a dark-brown pullover with small streaks, forming lava running down the clothing. Above the pullover, he wore a gray vest with similar patterns to the ones from the pants, and his belt, which now works as a miraculous was dark-red and the cover with Rollan‘s initial got brighter. His skin got darker along with his eyes and his hairstyle became fixed up resembling a fire flame with its colorings as well starting on the ground with dark brown, leading to red up to the end, which was orange and yellow.

„Wow!“ Commented Rollan astonished looking at his appearance, then ran at the exit and shrieked as the door got smacked back to encounter students from the fencing class run into the locker room accompanied by their class teacher.

„There‘s fire!“ Shouted a girl pointing at Rollan‘s superhero form, which looked around to spot the empty room.

„Where?“ Asked Rollan watching the disappear behind the locker while the rest of the team looked at the superhero. „Why is everyone looking at me as if my head was on fire?“ Asked Rollan and Mr. D‘Argencourt took out his smartphone to show Rollan his looks as a superhero and he got surprised as he saw himself as a superhero and his hair was burning at that exact moment. „Oh that‘s what you meant,“

„Get in here!“ Shouted a red-dressed fencing student, which stood at the entrance waiting for other students to leave the court and Rollan ran out heading to the field passing by a few students encountering Kim Chien Le, who he met on his first school day.

„Hey, Kim! Where‘s the danger?“ Asked Rollan watching Kim point at the outside, making Rollan nod and ran at the outside of the court to spot, a large, dark-blue car robot with two white stripes on its legs and arms holding with its left hand a police car with an agent in it. Rollan spotted on the ground Sabrina Raincomprix, which watched in shock the Roboter threatening her father.

„Papa!“ Shouted the redhead, making Rollan swallow hard.

At another part of the schoolhouse, Gerda was in the restroom washing her hands and moved to the side seeing there was no handpaper available, but a strange, electronic device, which had an etiquette with instruction on how to dry her hands in there. Gerda looked at her hands and slowly put them inside the device, which began to blow wind at Gerda‘s hands to dry them and the side of the device had a small display counting from ten down until it would stop drying. As it stopped Gerda took out her hands, then smiled at seeing it made its job good. Gerda picked up from the floor her bag, then walked out of the restroom out a the library opening up the bag to check her material, she had in it and noticed the wreath Rollan told to have found. Therefore the blonde removed the wreath from her bag, then looked at the reflection of a large metal cart and observed herself inserting the wreath on top of her head. As she‘s done that, a blue spirit appeared beside Gerda floating over the lavatory, shrieking at the girl at the sudden appearance of the small creature.

„Hello. I‘m Snowflake,“ Greeted the spirit. „I‘m coming in peace, don‘t worry. I‘m able to grant you powers...the power of ice,“ Explained Snowflake watching Gerda, which had gotten calmer. „With me, you‘ll be able to use ice. You‘ll be able to freeze things, create things, destroy things. A lot is possible if you learn to figure it out,“ „Like the….Snow Queen?“ Asked Gerda curious making the spirit nod, then she spotted someone and hid inside Gerda‘s backpack. „Hey!“ Shouted Gerda opening the backpack. „Get out of here, I need to talk to you,“ Gerda ordered, then she noticed at the end of the library a student, which was wearing a red hoodie and black pants staring at her confused. „I…..can‘t find my phone in there, but I‘m able to talk like this on it. That‘s pretty cool, isn‘t it?“ Asked Gerda faking a grin at the student.

„Uh…..we gotta hide, there‘s another akuma out there terrorizing the city,“ Stated the student making Gerda nod.

„I will come, don‘t worry,“ Responded Gerda watching the boy move on, then from Gerda‘s pocket came out the spirit, making her frown. „Why didn‘t you show up?“

„You‘re my new holder, right?“ Asked the spirit making Gerda shrug her shoulders.

„I don‘t know. You just appeared at the time I‘ve set this on my head,“ Commented Gerda making Snowflake nod.

„Then I assume you are if the wreath is supposed to go to you,“

„Maybe,“ Commented Gerda, then Snowflake floated forward and Gerda followed the spirit to see above the top of the room two TV screens hanging with the news of the akuma alert.

„Shadow Moth akumatized another citizen, which turned into an Autobot and is causing trouble in Paris,“ Explained the purple-haired moderator on TV.

„Oh oh, that‘s right here at our school,“ Commented Gerda earning a nod from the spirit.

„So what do you think? Do you want to give it a chance and use your powers to take down that monster over there?“ Questioned Snowflake. „I think the superheroes would love to have another helping hand. What do you think?“

„I‘ve never done this before. I don‘t know if I can even pull this off,“

„You can do that. You‘ve got me and my powers. You don‘t have to get worried about being hurt or killed. You're sheltered pretty well as long as you have me activated,“

„Okay I could give it a try,“ Gerda answered. „I‘ve defeated the Snow Queen once when I was younger. This will be easier…..I hope at least,“ Gerda commented, then Snowflake patted Gerda on her shoulder.

„Don‘t worry Gerda. You will do just fine. Say, Snowflake freeze and you‘ll transform,“ Added the creature making Gerda nod.

„Snowflake, Freeze!“ Shouted Gerda having her entire look exchanged. Her clothings had vanished and her entire body was covered in a long, blue winter coat with big snowflake patterns spread around the outfit. The wreath got the similar colors of the outfit, the hair had gotten lighter along with the skin, and around her eyes, up to the side of her ears, she wore a mix of ice-white and blue make-up powder with smaller dots and snowflake spread over it along a part of her cheek.

„Woah I look like a….a mini Snow Queen,“ Gerda commented. „Or no this looks like a regular winter cloak,“ Spoke Gerda, then heard the door of the library get kicked back by Kim Chien Le and Ethan, the student he played basketball with holding up the doors, so a few students ran in for safety. Gerda looked from the second floor at the two, then she had an idea and looked at the stairs beside her and looked at her hands, then held them open wide and shoot ice from her hands and she approached the stairs, so she would freeze them. Gerda smiled, then jumped on it sliding down at the first floor, then Gerda shrieked and pushed down a redheaded student and flenched her teeth in shock.

„I‘m sorry Nathaniel,“ Commented Gerda looking at the redhead scratch his head and look up at the girl bewildered from knowing his name. Gerda saw him not caring about what happened, then she ran out of the library and a few students got at the door to see the mysterious person, that had just run out of the library.

„I feel like I‘ve seen her before,“ Commented Kim making the blonde student shrug his shoulders watching the superheroine freeze the long stairs, to slide down on her back.

Rollan stood at the exit looking at the robot, which held the police car in his hands, then he whistled to catch the robot‘s attention.

„Hey! You have to pick someone who‘s worth your level!“ Shouted Rollan‘s alter ego, then he heard a whooshing sound and turned his head back to see the ice-themed superheroine come along. She had made herself a path to the exit with ice, where she was trying to slide on, but she ended up falling down on her front. Rollan got down on the ground to offer her his hand. She took his hand to get up, then tripped over the ice and hit her forehead on his nose, causing him to shake his head surprised at the mishap.

„Are you okay?“ Asked Rollan raising up the girl carefully, then looked into her blue eyes and got lost in them. „Que Hermosísimo...“ Commented Rollan making Gerda grin embarrassed at her slipping, then both turned around as they heard Sabrina cry about her father in danger.

„Have you got any idea?“ Asked Rollan. „I don‘t know, how I can get up there,“

„Maybe we should attack him from here,“ Suggested Gerda, then Rollan nodded and ran towards the supervillain, making Gerda drop her mouth. „What are you going to do?“ Asked Gerda watching the superhero move his arms back causing two fireballs on the hands, then jumped up and hit with them the feet of the supervillain, causing the metal of the feet to melt a little. Rollan looked up at the robot, which moved his feet hard yeeting Rollan across the air, so he would crash with his back against the wall of the school. Gerda ran at the superhero to check for him, then helped him sat up.

„Are you okay?“ Asked Gerda making him nod.

„Yah,“ Replied the brunette. „My fire isn‘t powerful enough to harm him,“

„I saw,“ Responded Gerda and looked at the supervillain, which used his other hand to open the door of the police car, then stopped as the policeman began to shot with his gun at him.

„I think I have an idea,“ Gerda said running at the robot then used her ice power to build around the feet of the robot ice and Rollan sat up observing her doing that. Rollan looked up at the robot, then at the schoolhouse, and had an idea, then run into the school building leaving Gerda alone trying to stop the villain with her ice power.

For a long while, Gerda continued using her ice power seeing she made it to froze the feet of the robot in it, then smiled as he didn‘t move his feet in it. Gerda raised her hand in victory, then the robot tried to pull out his right leg, making pressure on the ice, which began to decay, making Gerda wide her eyes as her plan didn‘t quite work well.

From above the schoolhouse, Gerda spotted Rena Rouge fly against the car, then catapult herself away from it, while pushing Roger Raincomprix out of the vehicle and she landed on the ground, followed by catching the heavy man almost bringing the heroine down on the ground.

„Gosh! Are you heavy!“ Complained Rena Rouge, then the supervillain broke out off the ice and Gerda ran in Rena‘s direction throwing ice at the supervillain to stop him, unsuccessfully.

„Sorry, we‘re new here,“ Gerda commented watching Rena Rouge drop the policeman on the ground, which ran to his daughter and shrieked as the robot dropped the police car over the two.

„Watch out!“ Shouted Rena Rouge then Gerda used her ice power causing a long bridge to appear over the Raincomprix‘s and it hit the bridge, causing it to break, making Gerda scream and before it fell on top of the family Ladybug showed up, coming from the school and used her yo-yo to pull them away, before getting hurt.

„Well done, Ladybug!“ Chanted Rena Rouge, then Ladybug pointed at the school court, where the two members ran into and Ladybug noticed the foreign girl and figured out, that she was wearing the ice miraculous.

„Where did you find that miraculous?“ Asked Ladybug pointing at the wreath.

„It‘s actually mine,“ Gerda responded. „Or it‘s very identical to the wreath I lost,“

„Look….“Ladybug commented, then she heard the shatter of a window, then looked up along with Gerda to see the fire-themed superhero jump out off the window against the supervillain, landing on the middle of his leg, then he used both hands to create a fireball and grabbed the iron of his leg to melt it.

Ladybug facepalmed, then watched Gerda use her ice power to freeze the leg of the villain, then she stopped as she saw the robot push Rollan off his leg into his doom, then Gerda quickly used her ice to freeze the villain‘s foot and Rollan landed on the ice, slipping against Gerda's arms, which caught him. The boy grinned abashedly, then got dropped to the ground as Ladybug approached the duo.

„I see both of you are new. Per coincidence, I already defeated this villain once. The main goal is getting into the head of the villain and destroy the car keys,“ Stated Ladybug, then she heard Cat Noir‘s staff and looked from above the houses behind the bakery to see the cat-themed superhero come along and land on the head of the supervillain, then he knocked on the head of the supervillain.

„Cou cou!“ Greeted Cat Noir gazing upside down into the cabin of the car to see the human, that was akumatized and used his staff to break the windshield, then the robot moved with his upper body hastily causing Cat Noir to fall off, then grab himself on the waist of the robot.

„How shall we get up without any help?“ Asked Gerda looking at Ladybug, then Rena Rouge had an idea and grabbed the girl on her shoulder.

„Follow me you two,“ Asked Rena Rouge switching from Gerda to Rollan, then both followed the fox-themed superheroine and Ladybug looked at her yo-yo, then threw it up to activate her lucky charm.

„Lucky charm!“ Shouted the heroine, then received a large ladder and chuckled about it. „Wow this is actually useful….in a way,“ Commented the spotted heroine, then looked around the place and noticed the car of the police agent lie broken in front of the stairs, then she had an idea and ran at the car to place the ladder over the car. Ladybug watched Cat Noir jump off the Autobot, landing on the ground, and observed the Autobot hit himself on the leg, making Cat Noir grin.

„You‘ve got a plan, bugaboo?“ Asked Cat Noir, then Ladybug pointed at the ladder.

„I had expected you to remain up on Apace there for a little longer and jump down at the ladder, but now I think you‘ve gotta do it in another way,“

„From above the school?“ Suggested Cat Noir, then heard the window of the school getting broken, then both looked up to see Rollan‘s superhero form fly towards the supervillain, getting closer to his head, beginning to distract him. „I wasn‘t aware he could do that,“ Cat Noir commented surprised making Ladybug chuckle.

„Rena is quite imaginative, isn‘t she?“ Asked Ladybug looking at Cat Noir, which then understood, Ladybug had already figured out it was an illusion. Rollan‘s alter ego jumped out off the window and Cat Noir jumped at the middle of the ladder and got on the top of it, making the ladder swank down and Rollan‘s landing on the other side catapulted Cat Noir up at the driver cabin, thereafter Cat Noir broke with his staff the side of the window, then blocked with it the driver and activated his cataclysm to destroy his car keys to reveal the akuma.

„Bingo!“ Cat Noir chanted, then the villain packed Cat Noir on his head, trying to hold him down, and moved his hand close to Cat Noir‘s hand.

„Why is it taking so long?“ Asked Rollan looking at Ladybug, which noticed Cat Noir‘s odd movements from down, then she looked up at the roof to see Rena Rouge and Gerda‘s alter ego.

„Hey, snowgirl! Jump down and help the fire guy up at the robot head to help Cat Noir out!“ Ordered Ladybug, then Gerda looked down at Rollan‘s alter ego, which waited for her to jump down. „Don‘t worry,“

„Come on, you‘ll do just fine. I trust you,“ Rollan said loud, then Gerda jumped down landing with her feet on the end of the ladder catapulting Rollan up on the robot, then he landed on top of Cat Noir and grabbed the hands of the villain to prevent him to remove the ring off Cat Noir‘s hands.

„What‘s the next plan?“ Asked Rollan, then Cat Noir moved his head to look at the villain trying to find another place, where an amok could be located eventually.

„Do you see here anything loose?“ Asked Cat Noir, then Rollan looked around noticing on the rearview mirror a religious necklace hanging on it. He then kept looking around the vehicle and glanced back at the mirror.

„What about the necklace on the mirror?“ Asked Rollan making the superhero nod.

„That must it be, destroy it,“ Ordered Cat Noir, then Rollan picked the necklace and pressed it tight together causing fire with his hands, so it would get pulverized by him, then a blue feather flew out off the broken windshield making Cat Noir smile. „Well done,“ Complimented Cat Noir and Rollan watched the feather fly out, then they heard Ladybug activate her healing light to restore everything back to normal and around the robot passed by her light and removed the robot, dropping the two superheroes on the ground. Rollan got confused, afterward looked around himself to see, what had happened and looked at Cat Noir.

"Is your hair really burning?" Asked Cat Noir looking at the rookie, which was checking the surroundings wondering, where the robot had gone.

„Where did the robot go?“ Asked Rollan. Cat Noir spotted the citizen, that had been de-akumatized appear on the ground and beside him stood a blue, American muscle car. Cat Noir got up and went down on his knees to check on the man.

„Did you get caught on another illegal race, Anthony?“ Asked Cat Noir making the man shake his head.

„Not really, but I broke the speed limit and got my license taken away. I actually deserved it anyway, but I have let the anger take over me,“ Explained the driver, then Rollan looked into the car to see the necklace on the mirror, then got down to the man as well.

„That necklace in there, I used to have one from my mother, but I‘ve lost it,“ Commented Rollan.

„I‘ve got it there as a lucky charm,“ Stated the driver. „But I should really keep the velocity down. Not because of my life, I could bring someone else in danger or even erase someone‘s life, who‘s most likely to be innocent,“

„We never know,“ Commented Cat Noir, then Rollan got up to approach Ladybug, Rena Rouge and Gerda‘s alter ego, then smiled at the girls.

„We‘re not quite the skilled heroes here,“ Commented Rollan. „I‘m not sure, how we got to be them or if we deserve it,“

„Actually I‘ve lost your two‘s miraculouses during my last fight and I needed to retrieve it, but you two were fighting without any hesitation and trying to help. I think I‘ll let you keep them. Now that Shadow Moth is stronger than before it would be really good to have more team members. This was your first time, you two will gain skills with the time,“

„Yes,“ Agreed Gerda looking at Rollan‘s alter ego, which smiled at her and bowed down at the girl.

„Have you two actually a name?“ Asked Rena. „You know a superhero one?“

„Exactly, no one has to know who our identity is. No one. This is most important, cause if Hawk Moth knows about our other identity, we and our family and friends will be in danger,“

„Sure,“ Responded Rollan.

„I promise,“ Gerda added.

„So, what‘s your hero name?“ Asked Ladybug. „Paris needs to know, who these two newbies are,“

„Well I would need to think about how I should call myself...something feminine,“ Stated Gerda while Rollan pondered about it.

„Fire King, I‘m Fire King,“ Stated Rollan making Ladybug smile.

„It does‘t have to be complicated. Something very simple like uhm….Ice Queen“ Suggested Ladybug making Rena chuckle.

„Or Frosty, Frosty-girl, Queen Frost…….Ice Frost….“ Suggested the Fire King making Gerda chuckle, then she figured out a name she could use.

„Hey, I think I‘ve got one…...What about, Lady Frost?“

„It‘s up to you, if you like it,“ Mentioned Ladybug earning a nod from Rena Rouge.

„I like it,“ Rena commented making Gerda smile.

„I find it suits you,“ Added Fire King earning a nod from the light blonde girl, then Ladybug lifted her fist up in the middle, then watched Cat Noir and Rena Rouge get beside the two and look at the two newbies. Rena Rouge moved her eyes calling the attention of the two rookies, which smiled and placed their one hand in the middle to do a group fist bump.

„Pound it!“ Said the group together, seconds later Fire King and Lady Frost repeated their sentence, then saw Cat Noir‘s ring beep.

„Oh excuse me, I gotta go, see you another time,“ Cat Noir said waving at the group.

„How long have you been superheroes if I may ask?“ Questioned Lady Frost watching Ladybug think about it.

„I think about two years, almost,“ Replied the blue-haired girl. „I‘ve got a lot of experience on my back. You two are new, inexperienced, and are probably new to us all. Eventually to each other as well. The more we work together in the future, the better you two get,“

„Thank you for your confidence, Ladybug,“ Commented Lady Frost giving the heroine her hand to shake, then saw Ladybug‘s earring beep.

„Oh I gotta go as well, before I transform back,“ Warned Ladybug earning a nod from Rena Rouge, which saluted at the duo and ran away. Ladybug used her yo-yo and swung away, disappearing behind the building and Fire King and Lady Frost looked at each other.

„Do we know each other?“ Asked Fire King making the ice-themed heroine shake her head.

„Probably not. I don‘t seem to recognize you,“ Responded Lady Frost making the brunette nod.

„I felt like I‘ve seen you before,“ Commented Fire King. „I don‘t know, maybe your eyes made me feel like I‘ve seen them before,“

Lady Frost chuckled, then patted the superhero on the shoulder.

„Probably just a coincidence. There are more people with blue eyes. Might just be a coincidence,“ Explained Lady Frost. „I have to go. We will see each other next time,“ Mentioned the blonde making the fire-themed superhero nod and watch the heroine ran into the school court. Fire King smiled enchanted as the heroine went upstairs and leaned his back against the railing of the school sighing.

[bedbellyandbeyond]

Break Up

(Story Post)

“What about Ben? Yeah, I—No, but—” Jeffrey sniffled. “Well go then! Don't come back!” Nathan was just coming out of a meeting with Korsgaard when he caught the end of Jeffrey’s phone conversation. Jeffrey was in the hall carrying Ben strapped to his chest and after hanging up the phone, he just pressed his head against the wall and sobbed. “Whoa, hey…” Nathan rushed over quickly and placed a hand on Jeffrey’s back. “…What’s up? What happened?” Jeffrey flinched but relaxed when he realised it was Nathan. He quickly wiped his eyes. “It’s Bler… He just broke up with me…” “No way.” Nathan wasn’t surprised at all considering how little Bler seemed to be involved with his family based on what Jeffrey had shared in group, but he still felt bad for the boy nonetheless. “I’m so sorry. That’s terrible.”

“He did it through text too!” Jeffrey sniffled, holding up his phone. Ben was visibly getting upset as Jeffrey did, but he didn’t cry. “Who breaks up with someone over text?!” “You were just on the phone though…” Nathan remarked. “He texted me during my counseling, but I called him as soon as I saw it after…” Jeffrey said. Nathan didn’t even think young adults made phone calls anymore, but he didn’t bring it up. Instead he searched his pockets and found one of the twins’ toys, a little squishy octopus, and handed it to Ben. He hoped it would entertain him enough in the moment to keep his attention off his father’s breakdown. “…Break ups are difficult. Not to mention, it must be even harder when you have a baby between you… If there’s anything I can do to help, just ask.” Jeffrey slumped his back against the wall and wiped his eye again. “I… I just don’t know what to do…” Nathan nodded and rubbed Jeffrey’s shoulder. “Who’s picking you up today?” “No one…” Jeffrey answered. “Ollie’s at work until later and Korsy’s in, like, Montana or something… I took transit.” Nathan shook his head. “I’m not letting you go on transit like this. How about you have dinner with us? Then when your cousin gets off work, he can get you. Or Dax’ll drive you.” Jeffrey hesitated for second. “That’d be cool, I think… Thanks…” “I’m on wolf cycle which means I’m eating in the cafeteria this week which is good for us because we don’t have to go all the way home, but it also means you can’t stay too late,” Nathan explained. “But I’m headed to my room right now if you’ll join me.” Jeffrey nodded. “Sure.” Nathan offered to carry Ben for the way down and Jeffrey took the break thankfully. He was quiet the whole time as he was guided down to the resident floor, but he wasn’t crying anymore which Nathan hoped was good. Ben watched Jeffrey the whole time with his big wide eyes, almost like he was studying his father. When Jeffrey noticed, he pulled a silly face for him and pet his head. When they got to the room, Nathan let them in with his key. Wano, who had been watching the twins, got up from the floor by their play pen and came to the door. The tall stranger overwhelmed Jeffrey and he stepped back a pace before Wano was standing over him. “Who is this?” Wano asked, tilting his head as he scanned Jeffrey’s face. He glanced at Nathan and then pointed to Ben. “And this. This is not yours, Nathan.” “No, this is Jeffrey and his son Ben,” Nathan said. “He’s in my pregnancy group.” “Uh, Nathan… Who’s this guy?” Jeffrey asked. Then he lowered his voice. “You’re not sleeping around on Mr. Olivier, are you?” “What? No!” Nathan patted Wano’s arm. “This is Wano. He’s under my care at the moment.” “So… You’re fostering him?” Jeffrey asked. “Sometimes it feels that way…” Nathan chuckled. “But, no. It’s sort of like a sponsorship. He stays with us to get some more time outside of APID.” “But this is APID,” Jeffrey said. “Yeah, he still has to come back when I’m on my cycle, but when we’re home, he gets to come live with us,” Nathan said. Wano was still looking Jeffrey over. He pointed to Ben again. “You made this?” Jeffrey’s pride took over and he grinned. “Yeah, baked him myself.” “So, you are a parent?” Wano asked. “That’s right,” Jeffrey said. “Recently single parent.” Nathan watched how Jeffrey’s eyes flicked down Wano’s torso and a sudden realisation of what he might’ve just started filled him with worry. “You’re ra bit small, though,” Wano commented. “How do you fit a child inside? You’re not as tall as Nathan. He can fit two children.” “I think most pregnant people on Earth are usually closer to Jeffrey’s height or shorter actually,” Nathan said. “But I guess you haven’t met many parents here yet, have you?” “You and the fish,” Wano said. He looked at Jeffrey again and nodded. “You are closer to the fish size. I understand. Probably only one baby at a time then. That’s fine.” “I bet I could handle twins,” Jeffrey said, placing his hands on his hips. “No problem.” “Really? That is admirable,” Wano said. “I cannot carry children. I can only plant seeds.” “That’s totally fine by me,” Jeffrey said. “Okay, you know what, I’m really hungry,” Nathan said to try to slow the roll on wherever that conversation was going. “How about we go to the cafeteria now and I can text Dax to meet us there?” “Alright,” Jeffrey said. “Is Wano joining us?” “Of course,” Nathan said. “Wano, could you help me get the twins in their carriers, please?” Wano nodded and went to grab them. Nathan handed Ben back to Jeffrey so he could carry one of the twins while Wano took care of the other. He didn’t have to message Dax as the teacher came strutting down the hall to meet them at the door. “Hello!” he saved waving. “Looks like I’m not too late! Hello, Jeffrey. It’s nice to see you again.” “Hi, Mr. Olivier!” Jeffrey said quickly. “Or, uh, Dax, right?” “Of course! I'm not your teacher anymore. Just call me Dax,” he insisted. “Okay cool. Feels kinda weird but I guess I'll get used to it…” Jeffrey said. “Jeffrey’s cousin can't pick him up until later, so I invited him to have dinner with us,” Nathan explained. “Sounds good. I'll put my book bag down inside and then we can head over,” Dax said. They went down to the cafeteria all together and chose a table to sit at. Nathan left the twins with Dax while he took Jeffrey up to get food first. While they did that, Dax and Wano set up a highchair for Ben too. “The food's really good here,” Nathan said as they lined up. “If you don't have dietary restrictions, it's pretty much a buffet. Desserts are portioned out for the residence, but you can have mine.” “Do I have to pay for any of this?” Jeffrey asked. “No, no. It's free for anyone with entry into the facilities,” Nathan said. “Just tap your APID card at the end over there.” “Cool. Nobody told me there was free food…” “Yeah, it’s great. How old’s Ben? Can he eat solids?” Nathan asked. “Oh, yeah. He's big into Cheerios and yoghurt,” Jeffrey said. “And he’s ten months old.” “Ooh, a birthday soon, nice,” Nathan said. “They should have some options for Ben at the end by the desserts.” “This is pretty cool. I might come here more often,” Jeffrey said. “So uh, where’s Wano from?” “Um, Eclul. He’s Eclulan,” Nathan explained. “Listen, about Wano—” “Are they all purple like him?” Jeffrey asked. “More or less,” Nathan answered. “I’ve seen darker shades, but they don’t really vary in hue like Yulinians.” “Bler’s species wasn’t very different from us,” Jeffrey said. “His skin’s tiny bit green and his eyes are big, but that’s about it. Ben mostly just got his hair and eyes.” “Good for fitting in, I imagine,” Nathan said. “If that’s what your going for anyway.” “Yeah, when I go out grocery shopping with him or something, sometimes little old ladies come up and tell me my son has such beautiful eyes,” Jeffrey said. “But he could’ve also got that from me, ‘cause I used to get a lot of compliments on my eyes. You know, since they’re a little pink.” “They are a really nice colour,” Nathan considered. “Is that the fairy side?” “Ollie says so,” Jeffrey said. He looked back at their table. “I don’t think I could date another Prilarian…” “May be for the best,” Nathan said. “I think the best thing after a bad break up is to have some time to yourself. I didn’t even think I could ever date again after my last break up. But I guess, that was for more personal reasons.” “Maybe… Maybe not,” Jeffrey said. “And I’m thinking about Ben here. He needs a dad.” “Well, is Bler not going to be around at least for his son?” Nathan asked. “Nope. He has to go back to Poland,” Jeffrey said. “He said Canada deported him back there because it’s where he landed and he has a criminal record or something… He doesn’t think it’s worth it to try and fight to come back because he could be deported off planet… Korsy warned me this could happen because it happens a lot to Prilarians since they tend to ignore the law. I just think Korsy hates him. He’s probably the one who got him kicked out…” “Wow, that’s… Well… I don’t really know anything about Prilarians,” Nathan said. “Yulinians seem to be the majority at APID.” “What about Eclulans? Are there a lot of them?” Jeffrey asked. “I think they’re like a far second,” Nathan said. “Yulinians are mostly here to work as ambassadors in their fields but Eclulans are mostly here to make a better life for themselves. The thing is that most of them are pretty stubborn and typically come to Earth under false VISAs because they won’t admit they’re refugees of war on their planet.” “So, they’re runaways?” Jeffrey said. “That’s kinda hot.” “I don’t know about hot, but it means a lot of them get deported,” Nathan said. “Wano himself is in the middle of getting deported which is why we insisted he stay with us so he can see a bit more of Earth before he goes.” Jeffrey frowned. “Oh no… You’re fighting it, right?” “Yeah, but all we could get so far was an extension,” Nathan said. “It seems like he might have to go back to Eclul and reapply to return. It’s hard to know he’ll be safe though if he goes back.” “Oh…” They got their food and headed back to the table. Jeffrey smiled to Wano as the Eclulan got up to get his dinner with Dax. Nathan wondered if Dax was picking up any of this, or if Wano was even aware of how interested Jeffrey was. Jeffrey got Ben out of his carrier and placed him into the highchair. He put out a bowl of dry cereal for the baby to try and Ben seemed more than happy grabbing from it and shoving pieces in his mouth. “What do you do for fun?” Nathan asked as he started to eat. “Play video games mostly,” Jeffrey answered. “I'm starting to stream. I'm hoping I can build up some fans again and make some money. Reggie's helping.” “Again?” Nathan asked. “Yeah. I used to livestream when I was pregnant with Ben,” Jeffrey explained. “People paid to see me getting bigger. They seemed to know before I did that I was pregnant though. I was just trying to gain weight. Turns out I'd been wasting my time since my fairy genes won't allow it. But I got Ben out of it, so there's always that.” “I see…” Nathan said. “So you've stopped making those types of videos?” “Yeah. APID pretty much made me delete my account,” Jeffrey said. “I did give birth to an alien on camera, so they wanted to shut that down pretty quick. I do miss it though. I really enjoyed being big and round and just so tight and full… I was hoping Bler would give me another child but it seems that's not likely…” “You want to get pregnant again?” Nathan asked, a little more worried. “Of course! Don't you?” Jeffrey asked. “Not even a little bit, no,” Nathan said. Jeffrey waved a hand. “That's fine or whatever, but I want to be pregnant again so bad. I loved just how big I was, just waddling everywhere. And I want Ben to have a sibling to play with.” “Don't you worry about that getting in the way of your ambitions?” Nathan asked. “That is my ambition. That's why I want to do the gaming thing,” Jeffrey said. “Gaming is something you can do from home and you don't have to worry if you're pregnant. It's not like there's a boss that needs you in the office or whatever. It's flexible. You're your own boss. You create content whenever you feel like it and make bank.” Nathan wasn't sure Jeffrey was being too realistic. “That's if you get really famous, right? Until you start making that money, if you're supporting a family, you need a day job too. It costs a lot of money to raise children.” “Well, that's why I don't want to do it alone,” Jeffrey said. “The sooner I start dating again, the sooner I find someone who can support myself and my kids. It’d be much harder alone.” Nathan reached over and took Jeffrey’s hand. “Listen. I still think it'd be best for you to take some time to yourself. Process your break up before you jump into anything you'll regret.” Jeffrey frowned and took his hand back. “I appreciate your opinion, but I didn't ask for it.” The others came back at this point but before sitting down, Dax tapped Nathan's shoulder. “Oh, I got the meat lasagna instead of the veggie. I’m gonna go back up. But Nathan, they had your favourite bagels out. Did you see?” Nathan looked up at his partner a bit confused but he saw the insistence in Dax's face and realised he wanted him to come with him. “No, I didn't see. If they're my favourite I should get one.” Nathan got up and grabbed his plate. “We'll be right back.” Nathan and Dax drifted off back over near the buffet and Dax dropped a hand on his shoulder. “What's going on here?” Dax asked. “Are we on a double date?” “Oh god, I hope not…” Nathan sighed. “So, you're getting that vibe too?” “Less of a vibe, more of a big blinking billboard,” Dax said. “Wano has been very explicit about how he'd like to bed Jeffrey and fill him with offspring.” “Ew… Now that Bler's officially dumped him, Jeffrey seems to be ready to jump into bed too,” Nathan said, starting to panic a bit. “I didn’t realise they’d be like this. This is all my fault for inviting Jeffrey to dinner.” “No, no. You were just being nice,” Dax said. “This happens, I guess. They're young. Or, actually… How old is Wano?” “Physically? I don't know. Emotionally, ten. Maybe thirteen, tops.” “Mm, well… They are adults. There isn’t much we can do,” Dax pointed out. “If they both like each other mutually, then it isn’t really our place to try to break them up.” “But if they do get together and they do have a child, what then? From what I know from our group sessions, Jeffrey already barely has the means to support Ben and Wano is literally getting deported. And, I mean it's not breaking them up if they haven't gotten together yet, right?” Nathan said. “It's prevention.” “I think at this point it's breaking them up,” Dax said, pointing past Nathan. Nathan turned around and sighed. Jeffrey had slid around to sit beside Wano and they were feeding each other their dinners. “Fucking hell…” Nathan groaned. “Well, Wano has to stay with you so technically, they shouldn’t really have much of a chance to be alone, right?” Dax said. “And when he's alone in the house, he has to watch the kids.” “You’re right…” Nathan was still a bit unconvinced. “But I’m still worried.” Dax pursed his lips. “Well, if you don't want them to start making out in front of the kids, we should probably get back.” “Yeah.” They rejoined the table and Nathan sat across from Jeffrey now that they were on opposite sides. “Hey, um. Have you let Ollie know you’re here with us?” “Oh, not yet,” Jeffrey said pulling out his phone. “I'll text him now.” “Who is Ollie?” Wano asked curiously. “My cousin,” Jeffrey said as he typed. “I can't drive but he picks me up all the time.” “Cousin?” Wano inquired, unfamiliar with the word. “Yeah. My mother's sister's son.” “Ah. You are blood.” “Yep.” “Wano, you ate all your green beans,” Dax remarked. “Good job.” “They were not disgusting,” Wano said. “Very tolerable.” “I'm glad to hear it,” Dax said. “Yes, Jeffrey made them enjoyable to eat,” Wano said. “He made spaceship noises.” “Oh...” “Shit, it doesn’t seem like Ollie can get me tonight…” Jeffrey interrupted after receiving a text message. “Dax'll drive you then,” Nathan said. “Right, Dax?” “Sure,” Dax confirmed. “I'd be happy to." “‘Kay,” Jeffrey accepted. “You guys are so chill. I always figured teachers were really boring and dusty, but you’ve always been pretty cool, Mr. Olivier. Or, Dax. Sorry.” “No, that's alright and thank you,” Dax said. “Let me know when you're done eating and then we can head out.” “Is there a rush?” Jeffrey asked, sliding his hand onto Wano's knee. Nathan tensed when he noticed. “Well sort of. You know, I have my condition. Too late and it could be dangerous for you.” “Does Wano stay in your room while you guys are living at APID?” Jeffrey asked. Wano shook his head. “I have my own room. It's smaller, but the wi-fi is good and the bed is nice.” “Well, if it gets too late, then I could hang out in Wano's room,” Jeffrey said. “No, no… Uh, doesn't Ben have a bedtime you wanna stick to?” Nathan mentioned. “Yeah, I guess.” Jeffrey patted Wano's leg. “Another time then?” “Yes. You can see my rock collection,” Wano said. “Ooh, are they really hard?” “Yes, they are rocks.”

[mikkomacko]

Dear Daisy 5

Daisy never realized how big the house is until Harry's not there. Without his large personality sitting at the table, or his lanky legs kicked up on the coffee table while he works, or his broad body moving around the kitchen, Daisy feels like she's living in an empty palace. It's gotten to the point that she hates being at the house, but going to visit her family is just as depressing with them now crying over Sterling's departure. Her father's taken up more work with Thomas, hoping to make up for the usual revenue Sterling brings into the family. It's not much seeing as most of her brother's earnings goes into his personal savings so he can afford to marry Stella and take care of her. Daisy tried spending time with her future sister too, but that ended up being even more depressing then staring at Harry's empty couch cushion. So she goes on walks now. She's been putting off walking through the park because it reminds her of Harry now, and she stays as far away from the beach as possible. That really only leaves the town for her to walk through, but she likes the shops so she doesn't mind. She hardly buys anything, but the browsing keeps her mind off of Harry and how much she misses him and if he's okay. Her favorite shop to go in is the local bakery, owned a ran by a man named Robin and his kids. It's nice to sit at one of the tables, picking at a scone or mini pie and watch Robin teach his son's to roll out dough correctly and cut shapes into the pies. The three men are always so happy and carefree, and the feeling rubs off on her after sitting there for a bit.

Today, however, is different.

The bell above the door chimes as she pushes it open, stepping into the little shop and expecting a smile from Richard who's usually behind the counter. He's not there today, and walking up to the counter she realizes that Sam isn't either. It's just Robin, lips drooping down in the corners as he dusts some flower onto his apron. Daisy's smile falls, confused by the unusual gloomy mood in the bakery.

"Oh, hello Daisy." Robin greets when he notices her, offering her a pathetic smile. Daisy rests her elbows on the counter, holding her chin up.

"Is everything okay Robin?"

The man shrugs, shaking his head with a sad chuckle. "My boys left today," he mumbles, "one of them to the Poland, the other Germany."

Her heart falls to her stomach, and she thinks of Harry again. She's so worried knowing he's in France, she can't imagine how upsetting it'd be if he were sent to the front lines. "I'm sorry," she sympathizes, pausing a brief second before deciding what the hell, "my fiance shipped out a few weeks ago."

Robin looks up, a bit surprised as he moves to stand across from her. "Mr. Styles was called out?"

She shifts uncomfortably, scratching her fingernail across the wooden counter to keep her mind off of the war as much as possible. "To France for training and then assignment. I haven't gotten a letter yet informing me of where he's heading afterwards."

One of Robin's hands move over the counter, patting the top of Daisy's comfortingly. "It's tough, but I can't think of a greater man than Harry Styles fighting."

Daisy pauses, looking up at him curiously. She's never heard anyone say anything remotely kind about Harry before. He's always whispered about, gossiped about, but they're all tells of his rudeness or his harsh words. Daisy, having been privy to both, never really questioned anyone's dislike for Harry. But she'll definitely question their compliments for him.

"You know Harry really well?"

Robin nods, moving to untie his apron. "Grew up with his father. When he passed away I tried to keep an eye on Harryand Gemma. Of course that uncle of his stepped in, tried to raise Harry to be a prick like him-" Daisy giggles, never having heard Robin curse, "but good always beats bad."

He hangs his apron up, reaching under the counter for a small basket of oatmeal cookies. He places them on the counter in front of Daisy. "Free of charge, for Harry." He says, smiling softly. Daisy watches him for a moment, thinking that Robin must be a great father. He's kind, compassionate, but also tough. And judging by the two boys she's met in here before, he knows how to raise a good son. It's then that she realizes he's the only one running the bakery now, and while rations for the war have started, bread is always in demand. He'll be getting busy, busier than usual, and he might need help.

"Mr. Robin," she murmurs carefully, waiting for him to look at her expectantly, "if you'd like company or help around the shop while you're boys are away, I'd be happy to do so. Don't have to pay me or anything, I'd just like to get out of the empty house."

Robin's smile is warm and grateful, and he looks around the kitchen as if trying to picture Daisy back there helping him. Finally, he nods. "I'd love to have you Daisy, and I'd be happy to let you take home the tips for the day."

"No that's-"

"It's the least I could do," Robin interrupts, "owe it to Harry and his father."

She knows by the firmness of his voice that there's no room for arguing, and she knows tips aren't very much right now anyway so she won't feel bad for taking money from him. Plus the holidays are coming up, and she'd really like to get gifts from everyone without having to use Harry's money. It doesn't feel right to use it without him there, but then again, nothing really feels right while he's gone anyway.

~

Dear Daisy,

My training has been completed and I've received my assignment. Luckily for us, I'm staying in France, patrolling Paris in case Germany attacks. I'm sorry I didn't write sooner, it was difficult to find time during the first couple weeks, but you should know that not a day has gone by where I haven't thought of you. I ache for you, long for you so much it makes me dizzy. Patrolling Paris is wonderful, I've been here a few times, but I can't help but find you on ever corner. In the flower shops, laying among the soft petals. In the warmth of the bakeries and restaurant, beckoning me. Swirling in the air around me, shining in the stars above me. It's not the first city I've found you in and I'm certain it won't be the last.

I know I have so much to say to you. Secrets and truths that have been on the tip of my tongue since the night we met, pleading to be told. Oh how desperate I was on our last night together, aching to tell you everything. Again, I'm sorry, for I'm making you wait. I know you hate me, enough to cry for me, enough to marry me. I was once told my parents hated each other as well, and I had never seen love like theirs.

I hope you're staying warm as the days get colder, maybe planting vegetables in your garden in the back. Pumpkins grow well against the wall of the house and my mum has a wonderful pumpkin soup recipe. I'll dream of you tonight, and maybe every night, in our kitchen with the pretty blue apron around your hips, filling our house with a warmth only you could bring. My radio playing in the background, I'll wish to be sat there with you, argue over how you under-cooked the pumpkin just because I like the color of your pink cheeks when we fight.

Stay safe for me Daisy for I need a home to come home to.

-The Harry Styles x

~

Cold winds come with fall, blowing into the bakery every time the door is even slightly cracked. Daisy's lucky enough to be on oven duty, staying warm in the back while Robin works the counter. She's been working with him for almost a month now, finally skilled enough to help decorate the Halloween cookies and package them. Robin does most of the baking, but she always helps, and every time she finds a recipe of interest he goes out of his way to teach her to make it. Daisy finds working at the bakery to be quite wonderful. It's a good way to spend her time and she's never been good at cooking despite her mother's hard efforts to teach her. Meredith isn't much of a baker either so Daisy never learned that growing up either. It's exciting, working here. Like she's got a new hidden talent or secret that only her and Robin know.

It's only a matter of time before her mother or Summer starts questioning what she's been doing during the days, and she's dreading having to answer. Some may it find it silly but if she tells them about her new hobby she's afraid it'll lose its appeal. When she's here, everything is simple. She bakes and laughs with Robin, forgetting that men are fighting a few countries over. And if she's feeling particularly lonely, she can imagine that Harry's just at work, that she'll finish her goodies for the day and take them home in a box wrapped with pretty ribbon, body flushing when her husband praises her.

Even if it makes going home even more disappointing, Daisy will enjoy her time in the bakery. She's nearly curling the ribbon on a package of croissants for the girl on the other side of the counter when Robin says he's going to take the trash out back real quick. They were starting to close up when the lady came in, a Mrs. Weathers as Robin had greeted her, and he instructed y/n to quickly wrap her order. She carries the package over, smiling politely at Mrs. Weathers and charging her.

"You're Mr. Styles' fiancee aren't you?" She asks, counting out the coins in her purse. Her green eyes look Daisy up and down (as much as possible with the counter between them) but she looks more curious than judging.

"Yes ma'am."

Mrs. Weathers hums, accepting her change from Daisy. "Never thought I'd see the day he'd find a wife." Her tone is amused, mixed with a little bit of surprise, and her eyes shine at Daisy with a newfound respect.

"Why's that?" Daisy questions. She knows Harry's not well liked. He's not really liked at all, but everyone has their person. Maybe she's not Harry's person but her family made it so she is. And it turned out to be better than expected. So maybe she actually is his person and she never knew.

"I had a bit of a crush on him myself a few years ago." Mrs. Weathers admits, looking sheepish. "Tried to talk to him on the beach once, maybe get him to take me on a date in that pretty car of his. Barely spoke to me though. Ignored my flirting, even went as far as telling me I was desperate." Daisy cringes at the word. Harry used to hint at her being desperate too, but he never outright said it to her. If he had she thinks she would've hit him.

"I'm sorry," she apologizes, feeling the need to make up for Harry's rudeness. "He's got a sharp tongue and an ego big enough to keep his mouth flapping."

Mrs. Weathers laughs, waving her hand. "Don't apologize! It hurt at the time but I'm grateful he's the way he is. I probably would've married him and that would be awful. My husband Terry is the greatest love I've ever known."

Daisy smiles at the dreamy look in Mrs. Weathers eyes, but her chest aches for Harry. He may be rough on the edges, but she knows deep down he's sweet. He has a reason for all his actions, and maybe that's why he's terrible to everyone. A sort of test, wanting to see who cares enough to stick around. Or it could just be him knowing what he wants and being careless. Either way she's proud, knowing she was the one to turn him.

"It just takes him a bit to warm up." Daisy defends, "But I'm the lucky one that stuck around, I suppose."

Mrs. Weathers chuckles, picking up the package and nestling it in the crook of her elbow. "If you say so." She hums, adjusting her scarf and then she's heading out into the chilly air. Daisy stares at the door for a moment, thinking that Harry's actually a lot kinder than Mrs. Weathers and any other person that something bad to say about him.

~

Daisy's crouched on the lowest porch step, fingers begin to burn as she lights the last of the Jack-O-lanters her and Summer had carved yesterday. Harry had been right about the pumpkins, she grew so many that they were able to save two for soup, leave three on the steps here, and take two back to Summer's house.

Tossing the match to the side, Daisy watches the candle flicker through it's smile. She can't help but notice that this particular face has the same little bunny teeth as Harry, even if it's big smile is nothing like Harry's. Her heart sinks, eyes stinging as she pathetically imagines him. Not exactly sure how long she watches the flame dance, wishing it were Harry's eyes in front of her, she practically jumps out of skin when two hands jab her shoulders. "Boo!"

She almost falls off the porch steps as she leaps to her full height, the hands of Gemma being the one thing to steady her. "You scared me." Daisy says sheepishly, holding a hand to her racing heart.

"That was the point," Gemma teases, "it's Halloween." Her eyes look over Daisy, smiling falling. "And you're not dressed up at all."

Blushing, Daisy picks at the bow around her waist. "I was gonna be a kitten but I haven't had time to draw my nose and whiskers on. What are you?"

Gemma adjust the sleeves of the button up, tugging down the too-small sweater vest and holding her arms open. Her hip pops out sassily, "I'm Harry!" Daisy examines her again, realizing she's wearing her version of the outfit they mocked Harry about when wedding shopping. "I figured you could use a little Harry today, and I'm as close as it gets right now."

Daisy's glad she hadn't done her makeup yet, because Gemma's words send her to tears.

~

Dear Harry,

I've never been to Paris but I can't help but find comfort in the city knowing you're there. I'm sure it's not exactly what you were expecting for assignment; you've always been a front line man, but I'm grateful the universe is on my side this time.

I grew pumpkins like you suggested and your mother made the best soup for us after Halloween. I wish you could have been at the house with me. A girl came dressed up as a fighter pilot and I thought of how much you'd enjoy that. Gemma came over to hand out candy and stay the night, which was nice. The house is to big without you in it, but for some reason it made me miss you more.

While your secrets make me nervous, I respect your choice to wait to spill them. At first it drove me mad and I spent days like a tornado in the house. I've found a distraction though, one I think you'll be proud of. An old friend of you father's, Robin, has been teaching me to bake. His son's shipped out as well and we've found company in each other's presence. I don't like cooking, as you very much know, but I really enjoy baking. Maybe one day that'll be our routine. You'll come back from the war, safe and sound, and I'll bake lots of desserts for us to devour while you cook our meals. And of course your radio will be on, and maybe I'll make you dance with me. I happen to be a very good dancer when you're my partner, and no matter how much I try to fight it, you'll always be my greatest partner.

Stay safe for me Harry or I'll have no husband to bake for. With all my heart, Daisy o

~

Rain pelts against her umbrella, ice cold in the November air. It far too late for her to be out here, but at least it's a nice neighborhood. Not as nice as Harry's or Thomas', but still better than the one she grew up in. She doesn't dwell on that thought too long though, because she's still trying to figure out why she came here. Shivering, the red door stares back at her tear filled eyes, daring her to step forward and knock. She wants to, she really does. Wants to go inside, sit next to the wood burning stove she'd sat by with Harry that one time he brought her here. Maybe drink some tea. Maybe wrap a blanket around her frame and cry. It felt too empty to cry in their house. Her sobs echoed and rattled, reminding her she was alone.

Still in her pajamas, she'd thrown on one of Harry's peacoats and grabbed the umbrella from the coat closet, running through two streets worth of puddles. Her soaked socks remind her of that.

Sniffling, Daisy wipes her eyes with the cuffs of the coat, finally stepping onto the welcome mat. Inhaling shakily, she knocks before she can duck out and spend all night crying in the street. Harry would be so upset with her if he found out she was even out right now. He told her not to worry, yet here she was.

It takes minute for the door to be answered, lights flicking on upstairs, and then on the staircase, and then in the living room. Daisy wills herself to calm down, bouncing anxiously as the door swings open.

"Daisy?"

Anne has wrapped her robe around her nightgown, rollers mussed in her hair, and eyes bleary but her eyes widen when she meets Daisy's red rimmed ones. "Oh dear, come in! Get out of the rain!"

She waves her in, Daisy's umbrella dripping water on the rug as she closes it and places it in the rack. Anne shuts and locks the door behind her, immediately reaching to help Daisy out of her son's coat. "I'm sorry," Daisy mumbles, shaking off the damp fabric. Helpless, she watches Anne hang it by the door, bottom lip trembling with surpressed cries.

"What's wrong sweetheart?" Anne coos gently, reaching forward to push back her wet hair. Daisy crumbles under the affection, chest aching so bad she thinks it might crack open to reveal her longing heart to the cruel world. "Are you hurt?"

She shakes her head, finally breaking down. Her body shakes against Anne, shoulders hunching as her mother-in-law wraps her arms around Daisy. Anne shushes her, rubbing her hand in soothing circles over her back. "It's okay darling. You can talk to me."

Somehow, Daisy manages to choke out the one thought swirling through her brain. "I miss him so much." It's simple, but the words make her cry even more after finally admitting it. She didn't realize how much she enjoyed being around Harry, how much better he made her days. Being without him is like missing the broth in the soup, the flour in a loaf of bread, the roots of a plant. Nothing feels right and she hates it.

"Oh darling, I know." Anne coos, stroking her soggy hair tenderly. Daisy feels small in her arms, cradled like a girl as small as Kitty even though her feet are on the ground and not around Anne's waist. She thinks back on when she wishes she were as tiny as her sister, innocent to this kind of hurt, and she can't help but think this night was born out of that wish. Maybe the universe started a war, drafted the one boy she may one day love, just because she was being sad and petty. It's stupid, Hitler's not invading previous German land because she wished to be little again. But it does feel nice to have Anne hold her, tell her she understands. All Meredith’s ever done is tell her to grow up, act her age, learn to cook, get married, have kids. Everything she always felt like she could never do.

“He’s really irritating but I want him back.” Daisy murmurs around trembling breaths, beginning to calm down. Anne laughs, whispering an agreement before pulling back enough to see her face. She strokes her cheeks tenderly, motherly.

“Let’s her you dry clothes and a cup of tea, yeah?” Daisy nods shyly, letting Anne guide her up the stairs and into a random bedroom. She digs through the dresser, pulling out a cotton tee and striped pajama bottoms. The same pajama bottoms Harry owns multiple pairs of. “These were his favorites as a boy. Don’t fit him now but I can’t get rid of them.”

Daisy changes into them in the bathroom, recognizing the scent of Harry immediate. He still smells the same today but more manly. Maybe it's that nice cologne he wears that makes him smell older, more mature. But his teen scent is comforting too. The two of them, feeling small but together. It makes her ache a bit more, but she smiles at it. Maybe Harry's thinking about her, smirking as he fall asleep and imagining her crying. Soulmates maybe, reaching out to jab at her throbbing heart. It's a very Harry thing to do, she thinks.

And she continues to think of him when she crawls into his childhood bed, an old record player playing an album he loved as a kid, with her mug of tea on his old nightstand. Buried in his sheets, it almost feels like he's there too. That's how it should be, husband and wife, buried next to each other forever.

[imnotwolverine]

Epilogue

Henry Cavill x OC Lisa - multi-chapter fic

Author’s note: OH! I absolutely adored writing about these two, but alas, it is time for us to part. And as I bid these two lovebirds (and their 100k long “short” story..) adieu, I will definitely continue to write. Please feel free to send me prompts or ideas and enjoy your day. 

Word count: 1.592

Disclaimer: fluff

--

This is the final part of the Tea for Two series. *sadness* I hope you enjoyed it <3

Read my other stories here.

--

Is the air thick, or is it just me?

Tapping my foot on the grey slate tiles of the bathroom, I glanced at the obnoxious piece of plastic that was currently taking its sweet time to give me clarity. Here I was, sitting on the toilet, a fumbled up box in my left hand and this pregnancy test in my right. A soft singing drifted in from downstairs, as Henry was cooking us dinner. Probably singing along to this jazzy cooking playlist I made, I thought.  

I smiled and sighed. I really don’t need to read the wrapper AGAIN, right?

I stretched out to place the stick on the edge of the sink, before tossing the wrapper and box in one graceful bow straight in the bin.

GOAL.

I smirked and half-eyed the stick again. No result yet.

Arghh..How long could a few minutes be?!

I knew the drill by now. Especially after that little heart attack moment a few months ago.

What probably had just been some mild stomach flue, had awoken a whole new phase in our relationship. Suddenly there was this baby-situation we needed to discuss. And I, for one, was not quite ready for that.

It became a mind boggling 12-hour rollercoaster that came to an immediate halt as it happened to be a false alarm. Just some painful boobs and a bit of throwing up.

Now, however, it seemed more game on. For a few days now I had been having morning sickness, unbeknownst to Henry - I didn’t want to flip his guts again for no reason. And ..well…there HAD been this Japan trip where I had accidentally forgotten my pill strip. And we did have sex. Hot HOT sex.

Oops.

What a few months can do, right? My life changed so fast, I barely even realised it. Two years ago I was living a very single life in LA, my mind more occupied with work than love. Fast forward a few months and I was suddenly cooping up with this hella cute guy in a trailer on the Witcher set in Poland. The next thing we’re meeting the parents, we’re moving in..he’s proposing. Holy hell.

And did I want to have babies with him?

I guess I..

I glanced at the stick again, noticing a line was starting to appear. My eyes grew wider.

HOLY HOLY HOLY..

OH MY…

‘Honey, dinner’s almost ready.’ I barely registered Henry’s voice as he called for me, my fingers now grasping around the test to get a better look.

‘Oh my..’ I whispered, quickly getting up from the toilet seat and folding my fingers around the plastic object, looking at it one more time before pushing it in my sweater pocket, my legs blindly carrying me down the stairs.

A waft of roast veggies and meats hit my nostrils, the sound of some jazz music joined by Henry’s soft humming. Ah the Sunday roast. I practically floated into the kitchen, my stomach rumbling at the notion there was some delicious food at the ready. And a delicious fiancé too.

I squeezed Henry’s ass and popped my head over his shoulder, looking at him work as he cut up the roast meat.

’Smells goooood.’ I all but drooled. Henry snickered in response.

‘That’s gooood to hear.’ He sang-sung in his low baritone, half-wittedly tuning in with the beat of the music. I chuckled, moving to fill a pitcher with water, before following Henry to the dining table.

Tony Bennett’s Tea for Two was playing softly in the background.

“Picture you upon my knee

Just tea for two

And two for tea..”

We sat down and as Henry started to open a bottle of red wine my mind all but reeled.

OH darn. I have to tell him..right now.

Or later? After dinner?

Maybe just..

Fuck..I can’t drink alcohol.

I looked at his hand as it deftly turned the bottle opener into the cork, the cork scrunching under the force.

‘I ..eh…’ Henry looked up, his hand now starting to tug on the opener, the cork slowly rising from the narrow neck of the bottle.

My cheeks turned bright red and my mind couldn’t form a single word.

‘You okay dear?’ He asked, not sure what was the matter as his eyebrow raised. ‘Please don’t tell me you just now became a vegetarian..’ He nervously chuckled, eyeing the roast meat as it lay enticingly steaming on the wooden board.

‘I’m pregnant.’ I finally gasped.

Suddenly there was wine everywhere. Henry’s hand slipped and the bottle all but tumbled from his grip as his mouth fell wide agape, the red liquid staining his shirt and arms as he stared at me wide eyed.

‘Really?’ He whispered, completely ignoring the wine spill as he turned on his chair.

I smiled nervously, my cheeks burning even more red as I fumbled, reaching for the test that was snugly hidden away in my sweater pocket. Just like a baby. My fingers grasped around the plastic and I tugged it out, my eyes also instantly dragging back to the little + icon that had appeared only minutes earlier. It was still there.

‘I’m pregnant.’ I smiled, a giddy laughter starting to bubble up in my chest as Henry’s arms were suddenly around me, his lips pressing precious little kisses on my face.

—---

*on Instagram* 

To my wife.

On a very sweaty early morning in LA I was preparing for my walk with Kal. Like I do everyday before work. Little did I know that Kal had different plans that day. He escaped. Something I can easily ascribe to be one of the most terrifying moments of my life, were it not that within minutes my phone rang. I heard your voice.

‘Are you perhaps missing a dog?’

I went out to find you and Kal. Which happened to be at the highest hill top. You smiled at me casually while handing me his leash, a sunset setting the world around us aglow. We chatted a bit while walking back down - you worked on the Witcher set as well and had this sweet quirkiness going on. “Lisa from marketing” is all I knew about you when you waved us goodbye.

Well. I asked around. And apparently there worked over 20 Lisa’s at the Witcher set.

I had almost given up on finding you again, when I finally saw you. Sipping on a cup of tea at the breakfast bar. And once more we had such fun, that I felt that this cup of tea was empty way too soon and you had hopped off your chair and disappeared before I could ask you out. It left me a bit confused. Should I just call you? It felt like we clicked. I had your number. No.. that’d be weird. Oh, how silly I felt when I would then continue coming to that breakfast bar again..and again..and again. Until I found you there once more. And we chatted again so very animatedly. You invited me for a hike after work. Which turned into dinner at your place. And the rest…well..it’s kind of history.

Just one week ago you have made me the happiest man alive. Because I may now call you not just my best friend, my arch nemesis on Mario Kart, my conscience when I so need it, but also ..my wife. I love you, my sweet Lisa.  

PS. Thanks Kal for that hook up. I owe you one, BIG time.  

“Just tea for two

And two for tea

Just me for you

And you for me alone”

—

‘PUSH! Come on! PUSH!’

‘I can’t do it.’ I cried, my fingers tangling desperately around the sweaty sheets as another contraction rippled through my wrecked body.

‘Come on baby. A little more. You’re nearly there.’ Henry dabbed the sweat off my forehead, the cool cloth somewhat alleviating my toasty hot skin as I squeezed every muscle I could squeeze.

Why did this baby have to decide to come out on the hottest frigging day of the year?!

‘AAAAAAHHHHHH BY THE GODS WHY..FUCK..AHHHHHHH.’ I scolded, fury raging through my boiling blood.

The whole world kind of swam around me in colours and sounds. There were indistinct voices cheering me on as I could feel the dull pressure at my lower abdomen, the almost natural need to push rushing through my very being. And then there was Henry. His head floating above me as he coached me through it all, his voice focused and steady as a rock in a wild, restless surf.

‘I am so proud of you. You are doing it. YES baby! YES!’ His voice became more excited.  

Flop.

Silence.

For just a moment, as all faces suddenly turned downward, I felt my heart sink. Was it…?

And then he cried, our baby boy.

Still a bit at loss at what just happened and even more confused at what to do, I looked over at Henry. His hair a tumbling mess of dark curls and his blue eyes glazed over with tears, he smiled, unbelieving of what just happened. I felt my heart sing through the realms of my painful body. All was well.

And then suddenly there was this tiny little person placed on my breast. All soft skin, caked with blood, a roaring wail coming from his tiny mouth. Our baby bear.

My heart swelled as Henry’s eyes met mine. 

Green meets blue. 

Mommy.. meets daddy.

---

“We will raise.. a family

A boy for you

And a girl for me”

--

The end. 

[wlw-imagines-blog]

Playing Pretend. (Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader)

Anon asked: May I request a Natasha Romanoff x Reader with prompts: 10, 11, 15, 16, and 22. If that’s too much, that’s fine, just do what you think would be good. But I love angst, sorry but not sorry. If you catch my drift.

Prompts:

10 - “Just leave me alone.”

11 - “I need some time.”

15 - “Stop pretending you’re okay, cause I know you’re not.”

16 - “Just talk to me.”

22 - “Choose me.”

Warnings: Angst

Word Count: 973 words

Summary: Natasha and Y/N feel the stress of an empire as it crumbles.

A/N: Takes place during Winter Soldier.

Whenever Natasha calls out of the blue, you’re on high alert.

You’re in S.H.I.E.L.D.’s headquarters when your phone rings, walking through the thick crowd of agents.

“Nat, what is it?” 

“S.H.I.E.L.D.’s been compromised, you need to get out of there. Contact me when communications are secure.” You’ve never heard Natasha sound so worried.

Stopping dead in your tracks, you immediately hung up. It felt as thought the air in your lungs had turned to water. You pressed your earpiece. “Nat? you out there?”

“I copy, Y/N” Natasha responded. “Are we secure?” 

“Give me a minute,” you whispered, crossing the atrium to the basement garage. “Fill me in, Nat.”

“Hydra’s infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D., we don’t know who’s working against us. Y/N, you can’t trust anyone, is that clear?”

“How can I trust you?”

You could practically hear her smiling through the comm. “If I wanted you dead, I wouldn’t have called.”

Swallowing, you stepped into the elevator. “Where am I going?” 

“Get in a quinjet, I’ll give you the co-ordinates after you disable it’s GPS tracker, and communication system.”

“Got it,” You murmured, pressing the close doors button.

A hand shot into the gap, stopping the doors from closing. You caught the shout that tried to escape you. The hand wrenched the doors open, revealing Agent Rumlow on the other side.

“Going down?” His gravelly voice asked. 

You nodded, mouth wound shut. Don’t trust anyone.

He stood next to you in the elevator, eyes gliding over you suspiciously. “What are doing here, Agent?”

You swallowed, forcing your voice to remain neutral. “I’m just checking to see if McConnelly has a quinjet prepped for tomorrow; I’m suppose to be in Morocco.”

Sweat prickled your neck as Rumlow remained silent.

“Last I checked,” he said slowly. “McConnelly hasn’t come back from Poland.”

Your heart stopped. Shit. “Is that so? Stevenson told me he came back a week ago. I’ll look for Morales, then.”

The elevator dinged, finally arriving in the basement, and you slipped out, not missing the look Rumlow was giving you.

The doors slid shut once more, and you let yourself breathe.

“Okay, Nat. I’m in the hanger, give me a minute.” you whispered, passing the lines of quinjets. You found one with a full tank at the end of the row.

Within minutes, you were in the sky, disabling the comms and tracker. 

“I’m in the sky now,” you could feel the adrenaline from the elevator fading. 

“Good,” she sounded relieved. After rattling off the co-ordinates, you flew in silence. 

An hour and a half of flying brought you to a safe house in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by crops and vegetation. You landed in an open field before making your way to the farm house on foot. 

“Hello?” you knocked on the screen door. “Anyone here?”

There was a pause before the door unlocked and opened. “Y/N?” It was Natasha, bruised and bandaged, standing on the other side. Her expression remained hard. “Tell me something only she would know.”

You scratched your jaw. “The first date we had ended in a fight, you beat the shit out of some guy at the bar because he cat-called me.”

She smiled, opening the door for you. “Come in.”

You wrapped your arms around her for a few seconds before pulling away. “What’s happened?”

Natasha shook her head, eyes closed.

“Just talk to me, Nat, please.”

“Everything’s falling apart,” she whispered, voice wavering uncharacteristically. “I need some time to process everything.”

You heard footsteps from the hall. “We don’t have time.”

Steve Rogers was standing there, eyes downcast, arms crossed. ‘We need to plan our next attack.”

“Attack?” you asked, desperately wishing to be alone with Natasha. “On all of S.H.I.E.L.D.? That’s insane, Rogers.”

“Do you have a better idea?” He asked in a sharp tone. 

You were taken aback. “I don’t, but I’d rather not go in, sorely out numbered, guns blazing, and get ourselves killed. That’s not your style.”

Before Steve could retort, Natasha held a hand up. “Excuse me. I need a minute.”

She crossed the foyer and went into the living room, leaving you and Steve in silence.

***

You found her sitting on the back porch, arms resting on her knees. 

“Hey,” you said quietly. ‘I’m sorry.”

“Y/N,” Natasha sighed. “Just leave me alone.”

You sat next to her. “If you wanted to be alone, you wouldn’t have brought me here.”

“I had to make sure you were safe.”

“And I really appreciate you doing that; I think you saved my life.”

She smiled, putting on a brave face that rivaled any actor or actress in the world. “No problem at all-”

“Stop,” You said, pinching the bridge of your nose. “You don’t have to act like everything is fine when you’re around me. Stop pretending you’re okay, ‘cause I know you’re not. Please. Not with me.”

Natasha was shaking her head. “I’m not pretending, Y/N. I’m trying to keep it together, because my life is falling apart. Everything I have is gone.”

“I’m still here.”

“People are dying, and I should have been able to stop it.”

You laughed incredulously. “Natasha! you can’t blame yourself for every casualty!”

“I’m not blaming myself,” she bit out. “I’m telling you the truth; I can stop this.”

“You’ll get yourself killed,” you snapped. “If Hydra is really working in S.H.I.E.L.D., we’ll never know how many people we’re up against! We’ll be leaving it up to chance, and that’s incredibly unlike you, Natasha.” 

She was at a loss. “I don’t know what you want me to say. What decision do you want me to make, Y/N? What choice?”

“Don’t choose this war. Choose me,” you whispered.

Natasha’s jaw was clenched. “I can’t. Not right now, anyway.”

She stood and walked back into the house. You closed your eyes, and pretended everything was okay.

[collecting-stories]

Across a Lifetime - Magneto

“I’ve been in love with you my entire life, since the day I met you.” With Magneto please? Thanks!

Across a Lifetime - Magneto x reader

“Max!” The young boy turned his head to the sound of someone calling for him. Running down the street toward him was a young girl, the yellow star bright against her black coat. She stopped short of colliding with him. “Max, thank god you are alright, I was so worried.”  

“I’m fine.” He looked back to where you had come down the road, “where is your father?”

You were not so much younger than him that you needed a parent with you to go outside but he worried none the less when he saw no one accompanying you. He put his hands on your face, holding you steady while he looked into your eyes. He had awoken last night to the sounds of screaming and the unmistakable sight of the streets below his parent’s apartment in flames. His mother had urged him to stay inside, away from the windows and doors.  

“No lights my love,” she had insisted, brushing his hair back and kissing the top of his head as she held him against her. She was still in her nightgown and robe as she held onto him and he realized his father was no longer in the house. Even in that moment, when he knew his first thought should be of his father, he thought only of you.  

Max knew that your family often stayed late at the shop below your apartment, a quaint little deli that had happily served the city of Berlin for over fifteen years, since long before you were born. But things had begun to change, things even you were aware of. Max had come home from school with a bloodied lip just last week when some boys in the courtyard had begun to call you names and throw rocks at you. His mother and father had argued in quiet voices about what to do and he remembered the terrified look in his mother’s eyes the entire time. As if his actions defending you were the same as someone killing a man.  

The whole night he stayed awake, afraid to close his eyes or to leave his mother. When morning came and the fires died out he crept to the window. His mother had fallen asleep on the settee and he peered out the front window, looking down at the destruction of the night prior. He had taken his coat and gone down amongst the rubble to find you. But you had found him instead.  

“Where is your father?” He asked again, inspecting the bruises on your face delicately. You looked as if someone had stomped on you and in fact they had.  

You had been exactly where Max feared you would be. In the store front with your father and grandmother when someone had thrown a brick through the front window. It shattered the glass and hit your grandmother, sending her back onto the floor. Her head collided with the ground in a sound you’d never heard before and you had shrieked when men came into the shop, Your father was in the back room and two of them went to find him while the other three stayed in the front with you.  

“They shot him.” You cried, tears pooling and running down your cheeks as you remembered the events of earlier. “Grandma is gone too.”

“Who was it?”

“I don’t know, Max I had never seen them before.”  

“Have they hurt you worse than this?” His hand ghosted over the bruise. You cried and nodded your head. Max held you to him the same way his mother had held him.  

“Max, Max!” Both of you turned to see his father coming down the street, a limp in his gait as he attempted to run to his son. When he reached Max he fell to his knees and hugged the young boy, pushing you away unintentionally, "where is your mother?”

“She’s at home.”  

“Come on, we must get inside.” He urged, standing to his feet as a couple of SS walked passed, eyeing the three of you suspiciously.

Max held your hand and dragged you along with them to his home. You were still crying as they entered the house and Max’s mother ran to embrace him and his father, frantic over their absence. “You cannot leave like that Maxie!” She tutted, holding him close and kissing his head over and over.  

-

Max sat inside the train car, huddled on the floor pressed against his mother, he could hardly breathe, he was packed so tightly. Just hours earlier he had been playing outside in the street with you, laughing as you tried unsuccessfully to climb the tree outside the small house the family had been staying at. His mother said you were doing better. That you looked happier these days, even smiling again.  

After the Kristallnacht his family had taken you with them when they fled to Poland. You had only your father and grandmother and since both of them were dead there was no one left for you in Germany. There was nothing left for anyone in Germany. So you travelled to Poland with Max and his parents, his father going so far as to get false documentation claiming you as their second child.  

But you were not with Max in the train car. He sat between the wall and his mother, her arm around his shoulder as she pressed her lips to his head. He wasn’t sure if she was soothing him or herself. Beside her his father sat mimicking her, his arm around his wife’s shoulders as he kissed her head every so often, promising it would be okay. You were missing though.  

You and Max had been playing outside the house, climbing the tree and laughing with each other, when men, soldiers, arrived. One pulled you from the tree while another grabbed hold of Max as he thrashed against them.  

“No, let me go! Let me go!” You screamed, kicking against the man who held you.  

Max’s parents ran from the house, shouting and everything was a blur after that. He could only watch as you where hauled away from them. Max and his parents ended up on a train, packed with others like them. Others who had fled their homeland just to be dragged back, knowing that when they returned to Germany there would be nothing there but death. Max looked for you at the train station and again in the train car but you were nowhere in sight. A million possibilities ran through his head but his mother just kept mumbling that it would be okay, even though he knew it wouldn’t be.

-

Your feet pressed over stones on the ground as you walked along the road. You weren’t alone. Hundreds marched, their feet bare like yours. None of you felt the roughness under your skin or the cuts that embedded themselves onto your feet as you walked. Instead all you felt was numb. Your body was tired, you could feel all the weight of your bones heavy as you dragged yourself along. You could not die here on the street.  

You imagined yourself back in Berlin with Max, before the war began. If that is what this was. People who walked with you, who had been out in the world longer said the banned radios were calling it a war. It didn’t feel like a war, not when it had stripped so much of your life from you. The only solace you found was in your memories of Max. Images of playing with him in the street outside your father’s deli, going to his house for Sabbath and holy days, and walking to school with him. You couldn’t even remember if the memories were as pleasant as you thought they were or if you had imagined them that way because you wanted to. All you knew as you walked was that Max was the only thing keeping you going. You didn’t know if he was out there but you hoped he was, prayed that Max was alive and that someday you might see him again.  

-

You were not a mutant though you had a fairly good understanding of what they were. Or, you’d read enough in newspapers to form an opinion on the human anomalies and decide where you stood in the ‘good’ or ‘destructive’ argument. The degree you had in psychology provided you with a job and access to Charles Xavier’s team of mutants, or school as he so carefully put it. He wanted to build a school for those that were different to find solace, it was a nice idea but not one you were sure would ever truly take hold. His interest in you was as a member of his imagined school, a counsellor for his students.  

“I don’t know if I can truly counsel them.” You remarked, touring the grounds with him.  

“You can’t possibly have every lived experience that your patients have.”

“Of course not, but most are...easier to empathize with. What can I say to someone who can read other people’s minds Charles?” You asked.  

“You may not be able to relate fully but it’s my belief that even we have things we need to expel. You don’t have to understand what we’re going through but all of our problems are not in line with our condition. You’d be surprised how human most of us are.”

“I’m not accusing you of not being.”  

“Charles,” both of you stopped along the garden path to acknowledge whoever had come looking for your companion. The man walked over and, though he had called for Charles, he kept his gaze on you. He looked distressed as he stared at you and you couldn’t help but recognize something in his eyes, something you had been looking for since you came to America in the 1950’s.

“Ah, this is my collegue-”

“Max?” You asked.

Charles looked confused, he was about to correct you but the other man beat him to it. “I’m afraid I go by Erik now. What are you doing here?”

“I was asked to come here as a counsellor.” You explained, trying to maintain professionalism for the sake of Charles when all you wanted was to collapse into tears the same way you had that night in Berlin.  

You had been alone since Poland, shuffled from hiding places to camps. You had survived but barely and finally, toward the end, you were smuggled out of the country to South America with a German man and his wife. From there you crossed the border into America and you’d been living as someone else too, a nice catholic girl who was going to school to be a counsellor. It was at a seminar that Charles had met you and invited you to meet the people at his school.

“I’m sorry,” Erik shook his head, seeming distracted as he turned to Charles, “Can I speak with her alone please?”  

“Certainly, we’ll talk soon.” Charles said before turning and leaving.  

You kept your eyes on his trailing chair, trying to breath and calm yourself. You had always hoped. When they pulled you from the tree in Poland, when you were taken from a train car to a camp in the middle of the night, marched across Germany in nothing but a nightgown and bare feet. You had hoped the whole time that somewhere Max was alive. But as you cross the border into America and learned to adapt, to hide yourself from your past, you began to think that you would never find him again. That maybe he was dead. Like your father and your grandmother.  

“Max.” You cried, just like that night. And just like that night he pulled you against him, kissing the top of your head. “Max, you’re alive.”

“Shh, it’s alright, I’m here.” Erik promised, more tender than he had been in recent years. More tender than he could remember.  

“I missed you, I love you so much, I-” you confessed.  

“I’ve been in love with you my entire life,” Erik said, holding your face in his hands and inspecting you, kissing your forehead. “Since the day I met you.”

I wanted to write this around Erik’s backstory. Let me know what you think!

[thecosmicjackalope]

so i was googling the Virgin Mary (for personal reasons that aren’t relevant to this post) and i came across an image:

this one. this one right here.

here is an article for context: https://time.com/5585069/poland-lgbt-rainbow-jesus-arrest/ i encourage you to read it, but to sum it up, an LGBT activist by the name of Elżbieta Podleśna was arrested for posting up images of the Black Madonna of Częstochowa and her Son with pro-LGBT rainbow halos near St Dominic’s Church over the Easter weekend of May 2019. She didn’t damage the actual icon itself - she simply put an altered version of it where others would see it.

This image is very special to Poland, referred to in the article as “the country’s most revered Catholic icon“, and Article 196 of the penal code in Poland states that “offending religious sensibilities” is actually considered a crime. A couple weeks after the incident, police came into her home, arrested her, and detained her for questioning. She was in danger of paying a large fine or even two year’s imprisonment for “profanation” of the Virgin Mary. Many were angered and shocked by what happened and spoke out on her behalf - in the article you can see a photo of protesters showing their support for her - and many others were far more focused on HER actions, saying her intention was to “humiliate Catholics.” One person, Interior Minister Joachim Brudzinski, actually sided and thanked the police for arresting Ms. Podleśna. He actually tweeted, and I quote, "All that nonsense about freedom and 'tolerance' does not give ANYONE the right to insult the feelings of the faithful.”

This is Elżbieta Podleśna:

And of course, she has defended and stood by her actions. Here are some words from this awesome lady on her situation: ”“This is certainly not an attack on religion, certainly not an attack on faith, this is not a form of attack...How can you attack anyone using a picture, let’s be serious.” “"I refuse to be told to shut up because there is a chance you will provoke somebody else. Wake up, defenders of human rights. Leave your offices, go out and say it is not fair.”

"This is something that is unbelievable for me in the 21st Century in the centre of Europe....Nobody should be excluded from society. Sexual orientation is not a sin or a crime and the Holy Mother would protect such people from the Church and from priests who think it is okay to condemn others." 

The first quote is from the first article, but the other two were taken from another article where you can hear her voice and get a better understanding of who she is. Here is the link. The more I read up on her, the cooler she is:

 https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-48257706

Like seriously, she’s done a LOT. She’s a psychotherapist, an advocate for LGBT rights, and a grassroots human rights activist who only wanted to point out that the voices of LGBT people were marginalized by the church, and she’s facing so much shit for it. Please show your support for her here, and help take action against the people trying to persecute her: https://www.amnesty.org/en/get-involved/take-action/poland-activist-elzbieta-podlesna/ A few more articles, in case you’re interested: https://www.amnestyusa.org/press-releases/activist-arrested-in-poland-and-house-raided-after-amnesty-international-meeting/

https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/woman-held-poland-adding-lgbtq-rainbow-revered-icon-n1002796

https://www.cnn.com/2019/05/07/world/poland-lgbt-flag-rainbow-halo-black-madonna-trnd/index.html Her critics call the image of the “Rainbow Madonna” profanity, but I think she’s beautiful. I think what Ms. Podleśna was put through, and is continuing to be put through, is completely unfair, to say the very, very, very least. The censorship of art, especially when that censorship has an obvious bias like this, should never be tolerated, especially when it does good by giving a voice to the people who need it. LGBT people all over the world have been silenced again and again, forced to keep quiet about who they are and deny their own identity in order to survive, and those that don’t often face persecution simply by being themselves. All Ms. Podleśna did was try to bring attention to that. She did nothing wrong. I don’t know why I came across this image. It feels like such an incidental, random thing. But the story and this image struck me, and for better or for worse, I felt that maybe it was something to talk about and bring attention to, especially now. During Pride Month.  Happy Pride Month to everyone out there. Religious or nonreligious, gay or straight, I wish the best for you, and I dearly hope you give your support to this lady. Elżbieta Podleśna shouldn’t be punished for this image - she should be thanked.

[pentakillmaven]

The Nose Knows, Chapter 2 (NaNoWriMo 2018)

I was able to finish the chapter earlier than I expected! Enjoy!

Chapter Rating: T

Chapter warnings: Canon-typical violence, mild language, more gratuitous usage of French language and the French education system. Mild spoilers for the the season 2 episode “Troublemaker.”

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12

Chapter 2

Monday dawned bright and early, as it was wont to do; the halls and classrooms of Lycée Jean-Baptiste Magnier were buzzing with activity. Some students feverishly scribbled the last bits of their weekend assignments, while others caught up with their friends after the weekend before making their way to their respective classrooms.

Marinette walked into her classroom, waving at Nathaniel and Mylène. "Good morning!" she said as she took her seat.

"Good morning, Marinette!" Mylène replied. "How was your Sunday?" Mylène and Ivan had been at the movies with the rest of the group on Saturday. The two had continued to date all through high school, and according to Mylène, they were looking at finding a university they could attend together.

"Ugh, crazy busy," Marinette replied. "I was working until nearly midnight on the Philosophy project for M. Leroux. I had a hard time staying awake; Aristotle is such a bore."

"Yeah, I had to do mine on Socrates, so I feel your pain. At least they're done, though, right?"

"Exactly. And this week should be easy since we have the practice tests for the Bac next week." Marinette sighed and leaned her head on her arms on top of her desk, closing her eyes in an attempt to catch one more wink of sleep before class started.

However, she quickly perked up when she heard a familiar male voice at the doorway. Lifting her head, she smiled when she saw her desk partner saying goodbye to his girlfriend with a quick peck before he stepped into the classroom. "Hey Marinette! Alya wanted me to give this to you." Nino approached their desk and handed Marinette a flash drive with a white and orange color scheme before taking his seat.

"Oh, this must be the notes I asked for! Thanks, Nino, I really appreciate you bringing them."

"No problem, dude!"

Nino, Nathaniel, and Mylène were the only students from her class at Françoise Dupont that had joined her in the Literature track at Lycée Jean-Baptiste Magnier. Thankfully, some of her other friends were in the school with her, just taking different classes. Adrien, Alya, and Ivan were in the Economics and Social Sciences track, while Alix and Rose were in the Science track. The rest of their group of friends had gone on to other high schools throughout the city--Chloé, for instance, was at a prestigious private school full of international students, where she got to rub elbows with the children of ambassadors and celebrities. Max had gone off to a feeder school for one of the most illustrious engineering universities in the country, planning to go into computer science, while Kim, Sabrina, and Juleka were at another local public school. Marc Anciel, Nathaniel's boyfriend, was also at Lycée Jean-Baptiste Magnier, but as he was a year behind them, he and Nathaniel didn't share any classes.

"So Marinette," Nathaniel asked from his seat behind the pig-tailed girl. "With the Bac practice tests next week, do you have any study plans this upcoming weekend? Rose and Alix are coming over on Saturday afternoon after class, you're welcome to come if you want."

"Thanks for the offer, Nathaniel, but I've already got study plans with Alya and Nino. We're making a full day of it at my place on Sunday. Right, Nino?"

Nino nodded in agreement. "Yep! I'm bringing the tunes, Alya's bringing the drinks, and you're providing the snacks. And if Adrien can get away from his dad, he said he'd like to come too, if that's okay."

"Oh, y-yeah, that's fine!" Marinette's voice broke a bit as she replied, a hint of a blush crossing her cheeks. Even after actively trying to get over Adrien by dating Juleka’s brother Luka (which made her realize that the two of them were definitely better suited as friends than in a relationship), she still had feelings for the blond. She might have outgrown the worst of her obsessive crush on the model, but now her feelings were deeper, especially as the two had finally been able to become real friends. Clearing her throat, she continued, "Of course Adrien is welcome to come. I can't imagine he's going to have any problems with the Bac, though, he's so smart."

Nino just shrugged. "I dunno, Marinette, he seemed pretty nervous about it when he asked me to ask you if he could come. He's probably more stressed out about it than he lets on, especially with how busy his schedule's been lately."

"That's fair. I know his dad has been pulling him out of school more recently for work. I'm just glad Alya shares classes with him so she's been able to help him keep up with his assignments and class notes."

"Don't I know it. It seems like every day the two of them are talking about school stuff and she's constantly giving him files. If I didn't know any better I'd think the two of them were planning something behind my back."

Before Marinette had a chance to reply, the History teacher stepped in to start class. Despite her best efforts to force herself to pay attention, Marinette found herself leaning her head on one hand, the other doodling idly in the corner of her paper as her mind wandered. It had been a while since Adrien had been to her house-- she actually couldn't think of any time since collège, when he came over to practice playing Ultimate Mecha Strike III for the video game tournament. (Though he did see her bedroom during the whole Jagged Stone/Troublemaker incident, but that didn't count since he wasn't technically there for it.) When Alya came over to her place to hang out, they usually spent most of the time in her bedroom, but there wasn't exactly a lot of sitting space for four up there. And if they were going to have their books and study materials spread out, the dining room table or living room would make a lot more sense. However, being in a common area would mean more distractions from her mother--or, Lord forbid, her father, as nosy as he was--especially if Adrien did come to the study party. On the other hand, being downstairs would lead to far fewer questions about what they were getting up to, and would make them all more accountable to actually studying for the Bac rather than just goofing off…

A sudden elbow to her ribs caused Marinette to jump, looking around quickly. "Huh?"

"Mlle. Dupain-Cheng, did you hear me?" Marinette flushed as she realized her teacher had been speaking to her.

"I'm very sorry, Mme. Chevalier… could you repeat that?"

The History teacher pursed her lips together as she stood at the chalkboard, obviously displeased with Marinette's lack of attention. "If you aren't going to listen to me, you may step outside until the end of class. And no getting notes from any other students," she added with a glare in Nino's direction.

"I'll pay attention, Mme. Chevalier. Again, I am very sorry." Marinette couldn't feel any worse if she tried. She knew that it was a very important time for her to be on top of her studies, as the practice exams were coming up and the Baccalauréat was the one thing that could make or break her chances of getting into university to study fashion design.

"Very well then. Could you explain the reasoning behind Napoléon Bonaparte's decision to invade the Russian empire in 1812?"

"Bonaparte had two goals for the Russian campaign: firstly, his official reasoning for the invasion was that he wanted to liberate Poland from the Russians. Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, he wanted to force Tsar Nicholas I to stop trading with the British, which violated the Continental Blockade."

"That's correct." Mme. Chevalier continued on with her lesson on the Russian Campaign, but once again Marinette found she couldn't keep her attention on the teacher despite her best efforts. It came as a blessing when the class period ended without her being called upon again.

"Thank God for free periods," Marinette said as she and Nino left the classroom. "I'm going to go hunt down Alya before next period. You have fun in Music Theory!"

"Oh, yeah, sure," Nino deadpanned. "M. Berlioz has us doing oral presentations this week since the Bac practice tests are all written."

"Ouch. Well, good luck with it!"

"Thanks, Marinette. See you in Philosophy class!"

Marinette ducked into a nearby bathroom on her way to find Alya, waiting for the other girls to filter out before she was left alone as the next class period started. Once Marinette was sure she had the room to herself, she opened her purse to let Tikki out. "Tikki, did you hear what Nino said? Adrien wants to come over to my house on Sunday!"

"That's great, Marinette! I'm sure the four of you will have a lot of fun studying for your test!" Tikki smiled at her holder. "Just make sure you leave me some cookies!"

"Of course," Marinette said with a grin. "In fact, before they come over I'll make sure to bring some up to you, fresh out of the oven."

"Oh, Marinette, that's so nice of you to offer!" Tikki giggled.

Marinette opened her mouth to say something else when a sudden rumble shook the school. "An Akuma? But there hasn't been one in weeks…"

Tikki zipped into Marinette's purse. "You'd better go out and double check. You don't want to transform if it's nothing, but better to be safe than sorry."

Marinette nodded. "You're right." Closing her purse to hide her Kwami, Marinette pushed the door to her stall open, but before she could get out of the bathroom, another sudden shock wave rocked the school, knocking her off her feet and sending her careening head-first into a porcelain sink.

Hearing the thud, Tikki cried out, "Marinette? What happened?" When her holder didn't answer, Tikki phased through the purse. She gasped when she saw Marinette's lifeless body. "Oh no! Marinette, wake up!" She flew up to Marinette's head, checking for her pulse and looking for any signs of injury. There was a bump rapidly coming up on her forehead, but no blood, and her pulse was strong. Unfortunately, with Marinette being unconscious, there was no way for her to call on Tikki's power to transform.

Another rumble shook the school once again, this time accompanied by screams and a roar of pain and anger. Tikki partially phased through the bathroom door to peek outside, seeing a large, hulking form covered in what appeared to be gemstones. "I am Gemocide! Bring me Ladybug and Chat Noir, or I'll turn the whole school into crystals and crush them into dust!" the Akuma cried out.

Past the Akuma, on the other side of the school courtyard, a blonde and a brunette were sneaking away from their classroom, ducking underneath windows to avoid being spotted by anyone inside the other classes. "Come on, Alya, you know it's not safe!" Adrien hissed, following his best friend's headstrong girlfriend as she tried to get closer to the Akuma, cell phone in hand.

"Look, Adrien, you don't have to follow me if you don't want to. I'm going to get this scoop for the Ladyblog! This is the first Akuma we've had in weeks!" Alya gave Adrien her patented "just-try-to-stop-me" look as she crept closer to the courtyard.

Shaking his head, Adrien let Alya get a few steps ahead of him before he ducked down an empty hallway that led to a supply closet. He opened the closet door as quietly as possible in an effort not to catch Alya's attention. As soon as the door was shut behind him, Plagg zipped out of his shirt pocket. "It's about time! I was starting to get really bored," Plagg complained.

"Quit your belly-aching," Adrien muttered. "Plagg, claws out!"

Moments later, after a flash of green light, Chat Noir popped out of the supply closet, launching himself toward the main area of the school. However, before he could even get out of the hallway, he was stopped short by the sight of a tiny red creature with black spots floating in the air in front of him. He felt an odd sense of recognition when he saw the thing, the smell of warm cookies and sugary sweets filling his nostrils. It took him a moment to realize why it looked so familiar.

"You're Ladybug's Kwami, right? What are you doing here? Where is she?"

The tiny pixie-like creature nodded in confirmation. "Yes, my name is Tikki. Ladybug will be here shortly, but I found a student that needs help. She's in danger!"

"All right, I'm here. Lead the way!" Tikki flew back down the way she came, Chat loping along on all fours in an effort to keep up with the surprisingly speedy Kwami. When they came to the women's restroom, Chat stopped just outside the doorway. "Um, Tikki, I don't know if you know this, but I'm not allowed to go in there…"

"I think in this situation it's okay for a superhero to go into the girl's bathroom!" Tikki said, crossing her arms over her chest. "The girl in here is one of Ladybug's close friends and she needs your help!"

"All right! All right, I'm going." Adrien pushed the door open, his eyes darting around but mostly staying near the ceiling until he confirmed that there wasn't anyone screaming at him to get out. When he looked down, he gasped at the sight of Marinette lying unconscious on the floor, a nasty-looking goose egg bruising on her forehead. "Oh god! Marinette!"

"You know her?" Tikki asked curiously.

"Y-yeah, I've-- I mean, there was that incident with the Evillustrator a few years ago, and I've seen her a few times since then…" Chat was thankful that his mask hid his cheeks, otherwise he knew they would be as red as Tikki's skin. He was not going to admit to Ladybug's Kwami how often he stopped by Marinette's balcony just to check in on her. "What happened?"

"It looks like she hit her head while she was in here, probably from the initial tremors from the Akuma. You need to get her out of here before it destroys the whole school! It seems really angry about something here specifically."

"You're right about that. I heard what the Akuma said. It's not likely to leave here any time soon, so I can get Marinette to safety and then come back and keep it busy until Ladybug gets here."

Tikki nodded. "That sounds like a good plan. If Ladybug shows up while you're gone, I'll be sure to tell her where you are."

"Thanks. Her house isn't far from here, so I'm just going to take her straight there and come back." Tikki nodded again in confirmation. "Stand back-- or, well, float back, I guess?" Adrien gently picked up Marinette in his arms before carrying her toward the window. With a cry of "Cataclysm!" he melted the window, giving him a clear exit to get out of the school as quickly as possible. In his focus on getting Marinette out safely, he didn't notice Tikki phasing back through Marinette's purse, returning to her usual hiding spot.

Traveling by rooftop, it took Chat barely two minutes to make it to Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie. He landed smoothly on Marinette's balcony, tugging open the trapdoor, which was thankfully unlocked-- he didn't have another charge of his Cataclysm to open it if it had been barred from the inside. He shifted Marinette's body in his arms to get her inside, settling her down on her bed before gently tracing a clawed hand over her face. "I'm just trying to get a better look at her injury," he muttered, as if trying to convince himself that his motives for touching her were entirely pure and not at all driven by his crush.

"Mm… Ad...en..." Marinette let out a soft, pained moan, shifting slightly on the bed, making Chat jump in surprise. Did she just say my name? he thought to himself. His eyes darted around, as if expecting someone to be watching; thankfully, it seemed the coast was clear.

He hopped down out of the loft, digging around on her desk for a pen and paper. He found a piece of drawing paper and a green pen, tracing out a rather crude paw print shape to let Marinette know that he had been the one to bring her home. He climbed back up into the loft, tucking the paper into Marinette's hand, giving her one last quick check to make sure there wasn't anything more serious wrong with her. "You'll feel better once Ladybug's magic has done its work, Princess," he murmured to her. Biting his lip, he reached for her other hand to bring it to his lips… only to be reminded of his imminent de-transformation by an incessant beeping. "Shit." Chat reached up to pull himself out of the skylight, practically flying up onto the roof to release his transformation. "Plagg, claws in."

When Plagg had re-materialized in front of Adrien, he looked angry. "Where are we? Why aren't we fighting the Akuma?"

"Look, Ladybug's Kwami found me"--

"Tikki was at your school? Why wasn't she with Ladybug?"

"She said Ladybug was on her way, but Marinette was hurt, I couldn't just leave her lying in the bathroom unconscious!"

"So you abandoned the Akuma to save your girlfriend?" Plagg accused, crossing his arms in frustration

Adrien had the decency to blush at that. "She's not… Tikki asked me to save Marinette, okay? She told me that Marinette and Ladybug were close friends and that Ladybug would want me to make sure Marinette was safe."  

"That… okay, yeah, that sounds like something Tikki would say. She's always been a bleeding heart."

Adrien pulled a piece of Camembert out of his pocket, handing it to Plagg to recharge his power. "Just eat quick so we can go back to school and take care of that Akuma, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. Just tell me one thing, kid."

"What is it?"

"Did you feel her up?"

"Oh god-- Plagg, no!" Adrien's face practically went up in flames from his embarrassment. "She's unconscious! I wouldn't do that to her! It wouldn't be right!"

Plagg just gave Adrien a shit-eating grin before eating the piece of stinky cheese. Within moments, Adrien called out his transformation phrase again and Chat Noir was off toward Lycée Jean-Baptiste Magnier.

Down in Marinette's bedroom, the young woman slowly came to consciousness, groaning in pain as she realized her head was throbbing. "What… what hit me?" she mumbled, squinting and rubbing her forehead. She hissed at the tenderness of the goose egg just along her hairline.

"You fell and hit your head on a bathroom sink at school," Tikki explained, floating just inches from Marinette's face. "Luckily, Chat Noir showed up and he was able to bring you home. I made sure the skylight was unlocked so he could get you inside."

"Chat… Noir? He came into my room? Wait, he saw you? Did he"-- Tikki shushed Marinette before she could freak out too much.

"No, no, he doesn't know you're Ladybug. I told him that Ladybug was on her way and would be at the school soon, though, so he's going to be looking for you. We need to hurry."

"Tikki, I don't think I can fight in this condition. My head is killing me-- and if I passed out, what if I have a concussion?" Marinette lifted both of her hands to rub at her face, only to realize she was clutching a piece of paper in one hand. Looking down at it, she saw a green paw print along with a short note:

You're safe, Princess. Feel better!   --C.N.

Marinette flushed red and quickly tucked the piece of paper under her blanket. Nope, not thinking about that right now. She looked up, realizing Tikki was speaking to her, and flushed even more. "Sorry, Tikki, I didn't quite catch that, what did you say?"

"I said, when you transform, the magic will temporarily heal your head, so you will be able to fight. And then your Lucky Charm should do the job permanently, since the injury happened after Hawk Moth created the Akuma."

"Oh! Well, that's a relief. All right then, Tikki, spots on!" Tikki was sucked into Marinette's earrings as she transformed into Ladybug, dashing up onto her roof and swinging her way back to school.

When she dropped onto the roof of the lycée, Ladybug saw Chat Noir dodging blows from an absolutely massive, hulking figure coated with what appeared to be large chunks of raw diamond. As if drawn to Ladybug by some mysterious force, Chat looked up at her, his face breaking out in a wide grin. "There you are, Bugaboo! I was getting worried that you were going to stand me up!"

"I'm sorry, Chaton, I got a little tied up," Ladybug said with a grin, launching her yo-yo at the villain in an effort to restrain him. Rather than winding around him, however, the Akumatized villain grabbed onto the string, pulling Ladybug off the roof toward him instead. Chat launched into action at that moment, distracting the villain with his baton to give Ladybug a chance to land properly and retract her yo-yo. The baton seemed to do nothing against the Akuma's crystalline armor, but the blow did at least distract him long enough to allow Chat and Ladybug to meet up on the ground.

"You seem to be in a paw-fully good mood today, My Lady, if you're cracking jokes like that," Chat commented as the two of them launched into a synchronized attack. Within just a few minutes, the two were on opposite sides of the Akuma, hedging him in and keeping him from escaping past the boundaries of the courtyard.

"I'm just glad to get to spread my wings a bit, you know?" Ladybug replied. "So where do you think the Akuma is at?"

"Right under his head, there's a crystal that's a different color from the rest. It kind of looks like a bow tie?"

"I see it. Lucky Charm!" Throwing her yo-yo high in the air, she was rewarded with a crossbow loaded with a flat-headed bolt. Looking around in confusion, she realized that there was a high ledge that would give her a clean shot at knocking that particular crystal off of the Akuma's body, as long as… "Chat, keep him busy!" Ladybug launched herself into the air using her yo-yo before her partner could respond.

"Of course, Bugaboo!" Chat said, turning his attention fully back to Gemocide. "Now then, it's just you and me, buddy…"

It took Ladybug a minute to figure out how to use the crossbow and another to line everything up properly. She took a deep breath in through her nose and out through her mouth, waiting for just the right moment… there! She squeezed the trigger between breaths; luckily, the bolt fired true, the wide, flat head managing to hit the crystal bow tie just so to send it flying into the air.

"NO!!!" Gemocide screamed as Chat scooped up the piece of crystal. "Give that back! If you don't give that back right now, I'll kill you and take your Miraculous!"

"Cataclysm!" A moment later, a dark butterfly fluttered out of the broken gemstone. Ladybug, who had jumped back down to ground level, swiped at it with her yo-yo, capturing it and purifying it.

"Bye bye, petit papillon," she said as she released the purified butterfly. She tossed the crossbow into the air with a cry of "Miraculous Ladybug!" Within moments, the magical swarm of ladybugs had set everything to rights, repairing the damage to the school and restoring the poor man's bow tie to its proper place at his neck.

"Are you all right, sir?" Ladybug asked the gentleman, a rather scrawny looking fellow with curly hair and over-sized glasses.

"O-oh, yes, I'm fine… thank you for that, I'm so embarrassed…" He looked down, twiddling his thumbs, not wanting to meet Ladybug's eyes.

"If you don't mind us asking, what happened?" Chat asked.

"W-well, you see, I'm a geologist, and, I applied for a job at this school, but I was turned down after my interview... "

"I'm so sorry to hear that," Ladybug said, placing a gentle hand on the man's shoulder. "But I'm sure that if you keep looking, you'll find the right job for you soon!"

"Y-you're right… I just get so nervous… at job interviews… and then I m-mess up… my words…"

Ladybug couldn't help but feel bad for the man. "I know how you feel… Sometimes, you can never figure out the right words to say, and you end up tripping over your own tongue, right?"

"Y-yes! Exactly! How did you overcome your problem?"

"Well… honestly, I still struggle with it sometimes. I just had to remind myself to stay calm, slow down, and not let my mouth move faster than my brain. Writing down what you want to say beforehand helps, too, if you can do that."

"I'll have to remember that." Now that he was relaxing a bit, the man was speaking much more easily. He even smiled at the two teenage superheroes. "Thank you again. You two should get going, though; the police will be here any minute, I'm sure."

"You're right." As if on cue, Chat and Ladybug's Miraculous both beeped in warning. The two of them made their way up onto the roof, planning to depart in opposite directions; but before they could leave, Chat called out, "What really took you, Bugaboo?"

"I had a personal matter I needed to take care of, Chat. Unlike you, I don't lose my Miraculous." Chat flushed at the memory of what Plagg had told him in the aftermath of the Style Queen incident, how he'd used that excuse to explain why Chat couldn't help fight the Akuma. For some reason, he had a sinking feeling in his gut, like Ladybug wasn't telling him the whole truth; but he couldn't very well call her on it without any proof, so he held his tongue for the moment.

"By the way…" Ladybug continued, "thank you for saving Marinette. Tikki told me what you did."

"Of course, My Lady. Any friend of yours is a friend of mine! It was my purr-leasure to be of assistance." He gave Ladybug a grand, sweeping bow, earning a giggle and a soft smile in response. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a very hungry Kwami to take care of. Adieu, My Bugaboo!"

"Adieu, Chaton," Ladybug replied warmly before the two of them went their separate ways.

Both of them ducked into alleyways on opposite sides of the school to de-transform, neither of them the wiser of just how close they were to discovering each other's biggest secrets.

As soon as Marinette made it back into the school and found her class, Nino wrapped his arms around her in a panic. "Marinette! What happened? No one could find you! Someone said they saw you in the bathroom, but there was no trace of you. I texted Alya to see if you were with her but she said she had no idea where you were and you weren't answering your phone. We were freaking out!"

"Sorry Nino! I wasn't feeling well, so I actually went home during my free period… I heard there was an Akuma though!"

"Yeah, it was crazy. He kinda reminded me of"--

Marinette cut him off, replying, "Stoneheart, right? When Ivan was Akumatized?"

"Yeah! The big rock dude! How did you know?" Nino asked.

"O-oh, I just, you know, heard people in the halls talking about it! They said he was covered in crystals or something?"

"Yeah, and he was huge! Like, easily ten feet tall." Nino reached high above his head, waving his hand in an effort to express the comparative size of the villain.

"Wow, that's crazy! I'm glad Ladybug and Chat Noir were able to stop him."

"Definitely." Nino nodded in agreement.

Suddenly, two arms wrapped around Marinette from behind and a cheek mashed against the back of her head. "Marinette Dupain-Cheng! Don't scare me like that!" Alya cried out.

"Alya, I'm fine. I wasn't even here for the Akuma attack. I had a free period and I wasn't feeling well so I went home for a bit to rest."

"Oh. Well, you should have told me you were leaving, girl! Then I wouldn't have worried about you."

"I'm glad you're feeling better," Adrien said, walking up behind Alya.

"Yeah, much better actually! I think I just needed a little nap, that's all," Marinette said, plastering a weak smile on her face. "Adrien, did you see the Akuma?"

"Actually, I kinda ended up hiding in a supply closet," he replied sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. "I was going to follow Alya, but I chickened out…"

"That's probably for the best, dude," Nino pointed out. "You know how your dad gets when you're around Akumas."

"Yeah, fair. Hopefully he won't threaten to make me transfer schools again…" Adrien grimaced at the memory of how three Akumas attacked the school within a week last year and his dad threatened to pull him out if the headmaster didn't do something to improve the negative attitudes of the students and staff.

"Well, just tell him that you kept yourself safe, and that should be fine, right?" Marinette asked.

"Hopefully.. We'll see though. Anyway, we should all be getting back to class."

"Yeah… I'm glad you're all okay," Marinette said, giving Adrien in particular a meaningful look.

"You too, Marinette. I hope you feel better the rest of the day."

"I'll talk to you later, girl!" Alya said. "See you at lunch!"

"See you!" Marinette turned to Nino. "Shall we head on to the dreaded Philosophy class?"

"Yeah, I guess so. God, I'm ready for this class to be over for the year. M. Leroux is a total asswipe."

"Me too!"

[dillydedalus]

2018 in books, half-time

this is some stuff about books i read so far this year and what i thought of them

also check here for a full list of what i’ve read so far, to be updated.... sometimes... when i think of it

best books so far

published this year: frankenstein in baghdad by ahmed saadawi (4/5*) (english translation at least, it’s originally from 2013 i think). tbh it’s also the only book published this year i read so far but it is really good so.

read this year: my sole 5* books this year so far are andrzej szczypiorski’s the beautiful mrs seidenman (I LOVE THIS BOOK PLS READ IT & PREPARE TO CRY ABOUT THE POLISH RESISTANCE & then talk to me about it. “a joke god tells the world called poland”) and shirley jackson’s we have always lived in the castle which was a reread but it’s perfect so WHATEVER

SOME other favs: exit west, street of crocodiles by bruno schulz, the flamethrowers by rachel kushner, the house of mirth by edith wharton (gerty/lily 4eva), the sea, the sea by iris murdoch

disappointments, just the worst etc.

i uh. REALLY didn’t like little fires everywhere. i didn’t have super-high hopes for it but i thought the topics of a superficially progressive community being confronted with their own racism & trans-racial adoption would be interesting but i found these to be really half-baked and the characters are just insufferable, especially the ones you are supposed to like (they are so SPECIAL and DIFFERENT and TALENTED guys!!!) and mia’s art is pretty cringe.

also, life of pi, which i read for uni, is mostly meh, a bit drawn out and kitschy but the tiger is cool but then at the end it hits you with that smug bullshit about how you prefer the story you just spent 300+ pages with to the one that is told over like. 2.5 pages AND THAT’S WHY YOU SHOULD BELIEVE IN GOD which is like... shut the fuck up yann martel

new releases that i want to read this year

tfw u preorder a book that’s not supposed to be out for another week and amazon forgets and sends it to you immediately anyway: naomi novik’s spinning silver. i adored uprooted with all my heart so my hopes are HIGH #dontletmedown

tommy orange’s there there

the winds of winter. I WANT TO BELIEVE & i will speak it into existence

the merry spinster. i love daniel ortberg and this year seems like a good year for fairy-tale retellings (@self bloody chamber when???)

the monster baru cormorant: in the first book baru did some things that i’m genuinely not sure she (or the book) can come back from so i’m excited (?) to see where this goes

biggest surprises

lmao i kinda expected to hate or at least be really bored with middlemarch because i don’t always vibe with those really long victorian novels. it’s good tho & i love dorothea with all my heart and also rosamond who is The Worst but really awesome at being The Worst

the short synopsis of the sea the sea sounds pretty boring which is why i always kind of avoided it but it is so good and fucking wild! i really didn’t know anything except ‘old theatre dude buys house by the sea & writes his memoirs’ and then every 30 pages the book just throws a curveball at you it’s great

the berlin library system FINALLY getting overdrive so i can read books on my phone at work lmao #bossmakesadollarimakeadime

best short stories

(i like short stories but the collections are usually a bit of a mixed bag so they rarely make it on the favs list)

“the tiger’s bride” by angela carter - see below

“the weirdoes” and “a better place” by ottessa moshfegh (homesick for another world): ottessa moshfegh writes awful, gross and unhinged people really well and these two were my faves

“arabella” by agnes owens: i found the complete collection of her stories to be so bleak and dreary that it got kinda boring but this one is dark-humour gem

“the husband stitch” by carmen maria machado (her body and other parties): i was overall a bit disappointed with this collection (tho i did have really high expectations so the disappointment is relative) but this one is just perfect. cw for BEING A WOMAN WHICH IS AWFUL

“the screwfly solution” by james tiptree jr. (her smoke rose up forever): this story fucked me the fuck up. it’s good but uh cw for.... femicide basically it’s a fun read

resolutions, challenges etc.

goodreads challenge: 53/90 books

my resolutions: read more german books (not going well at all lol), read more books in translation (going okay-ish), graphic novels (doing okay), books set in the MENA region (okay-ish), books set in scotland (not good), general diversity (going really well)

read some of the books.... i already have & have had forever.... instead of buying new books (guess how this is going)

best uni reading “THE TIGER’S BRIDE” BY ANGELA CARTER bc i too want to marry a sexy tigermonster! who doesn’t! exit west is really good too but to be fair i’d already read it before that seminar

themes that kept coming up for some reason

tigers! just tigers everywhere. humanoid tigers that are maybe kinda sexy, tigers on a boat that may be a symbol for blabla SHUT UP YANN JUST LET RICHARD PARKER BE A TIGER WHO DOES TIGER STUFF, to the unseen demonic forces whose name you cannot speak for fear in the sundarbans (the hungry tide) to... i’m sure there’s more tigers & i will take this as a sign that i should get a cat. or two. 

you know that abduction as romance trope video that’s going around right now? guess whose trash ass loves that trope. 

border crossing & that sort of thing. to be fair that’s the topic of one of my seminars but it also happened all the time elsewhere so we’re counting it

[looselucy]

To War - Dunkirk / Alex

Part 1 of 4

September, 1939 Alex marched over the cobbled street with fire beneath his heels, his fists gripped down his side, his heart pounding, his ears still ringing over the crackled words that had just been announced through the stereo they’d all been gathered around. “Alex!” He heard his name being called, but didn’t stop or turn around to look. “ALEX! What’re you doing?” “I’m volunteering.” He simply replied, breathless as he marched towards the town council.

He didn’t know where he was supposed to go. He didn’t know where to start and he didn’t know what he was doing other than being completely frantic and impulsive. All he knew, was that his mind wouldn’t change. Impulsive or not. “Alex, stop! Think about this!” “We’re at war, Richard!” He turned around, yelling to his friend. “All I’ve done is think about this! I can’t just… sit here. N’if I don’t volunteer, I’ll just get the papers calling me up to fight anyway. This is my choice, Richard, and I choose to fight for my country.” After the invasion of Poland, Alex knew it would only be a matter of days, and it was all he’d thought about. Every day, he’d see the posters, hear the announcements on the radio, and he’d always known he was going to step up. It was just a matter of time. “You don’t have anything to prove, Alex.” Richard tried, though he knew it was pointless. Alex shook his head, scowling and biting back words of hatred, knowing exactly what he meant by saying that, and being angry that he didn’t have the guts to just say the honest words out loud. Instead, he’d cloaked them, twisted them into something else, and not quite said what he was thinking. With one final scowl, he turned back on his heel, ignoring the wind and ignoring how his chest felt like it was on fire, and heading over to volunteer to fight for what he knew was right. “I’m coming with you.” He heard again, followed by the noise of scuttling footsteps as Richard moved to catch him up. He turned to his side once he sensed Richard had caught up, glaring down to the boy, but softening slightly. “You’re not signing up, are ya?” He huffed. “You’d be useless.” “They’re never gunna find enough men. I’m liable for conscription, so… Maybe it makes sense… to volunteer.” “But you don’t want to.” “No one wants to.” “I do!” Alex argued. Richard sighed, looking down to the ground, practically kicking the pavement as they journeyed, feeling colder the closer they got. “I know you do.” He heaved. Alex’s father had gone to fight in the First World War, and he’d never come back. He’d died at the very end of the war, and left his mother to raise him completely on her own. Alex had never really known his father as anything other than a war hero. Alex had been the man of the household for as long as he could remember, and he wanted, more than anything, to continue a legacy created by a man he’d never really known. He was his idol. He always had been. This war felt like a calling, a chance to truly prove himself. The war was advertised as though glory was guaranteed to accompany it, and Alex had bought into that idea almost immediately. There were a lot of factors that drove him into the arms of battle, and he was choosing to remain blissfully blind to just how tight its snare would be. - I ask them to stand calm, firm and united in this time of trial. The task will be hard. There may be dark days ahead and war can no longer be confined to the battlefield. But we can only do the right as we see the right and reverently commit our cause to God. - It was freezing cold, almost pitch-black, the moon and the scattered streetlamps giving an eerie glow to the quiet street Alex had found himself upon. He gazed up to her window, glancing to his right and then to his left to make sure he was entirely alone before he crouched down the ground, toying a larger piece of gravel between his fingers before he lifted back upright, and threw it against her windowpane. He stood patiently waiting for some sign of life, and received none. He crouched down again, scoping tactfully through the stones to find a few he deemed to be the perfect size, enough to cause some noise but not too much as to break the glass. He threw three in a row, leaving a small gap between each toss, just about to bend down to retrieve another stone before he saw her light flicker on. A very small smile introduced itself to his lips as he waited, soon hearing her window crack open, squeezing her top half of the body through the gap and squinting down towards him. “Alex?” She questioned. “Yeah.” “What… What are you doing here?” “Come on.” He flicked his head backwards. “What?” “Come with me.” “It’s the middle of the night!” “Eve, c’mon.” He ushered her. “I know you’re gunna come with me, so stop wasting time.” Although she huffed, she couldn’t help but smile, slamming her window shut once again and moving to change from her nightgown. Evelyn and Alex had always been like this, random and bizarre encounters that he always spurred. He’d appear at the shop her father owned and lean on the counter and bat his eyelashes and talk with her until her father literally had to kick him out. He’d appear at her front door when he knew she was home alone. He’d always just appear from nowhere, whenever it was convenient for him, and make sure her time was his to take. She’d always wished she could resist him, even just once, but she never had. Only a few minutes later, she was letting herself out of the front door as quietly as she could, shaking her head at him as he stood with his hands in his pockets, grinning at another successful attempt to use up some time she’d designated to something else. “Haven’t seen you for weeks.” She tut, slowly walking over to him. “Been busy.” He shrugged. “How busy can one boy be?” “Busy.” She wondered briefly if she’d ever really know where she stood with him. They’d never been courting, but she always felt something when they spent time together, which was often. The two of them had just never really felt any need to label that feeling, or ever truly act on it. All she knew was that she’d pretty much drop everything to spend time with him. He took off without saying anything, Evelyn following quietly behind, seeing him fleetingly glance over his shoulder to see she had tracked his steps, and smirking to himself once he had his proof. “How’ve you been?” He asked. “I’ve been okay.” She replied nervously, practically chasing him into the night. “How… How about you? How’s… everything? How’s your mum? Did you-” “She’s fine. She’s… surviving.” They’d never discussed it, but Evelyn knew he would have volunteered to fight as soon as he physically could. After everything he’d been through, and then down to the type of person he was to his core, it would have never been any other way. She’d been waiting for him to turn up, to talk to her about it, tell her so that she could hear and be certain of it, but this was the first time she’d seen him for weeks. Weeks had passed since the official statement was broadcast, and they knew they were at war, and she’d been waiting for him. He’d disappeared, for a while. She kept thinking of his mother, and what she’d be going through, how she’d be feeling. In an attempt to find the right words, Evelyn said nothing. Nothing at all. They must have been walking for around five minutes, and she had finally found a pace where she could remain at his side when he broke the silence. “I’ve missed you.” He simply stated. “Well, you know where to find me, Alex.” She sighed, expecting a reply, but not getting one. “Where are we going?” “To the river.” “Why?” “Because I need to talk to you.” “And we can’t do that here?” She cried. “You’re always so inquisitive.” He grinned, looking down to her. “And it does not work well with how secretive you always are.” That just made him smile more, shaking his head at her and forever endeared by her. Eventually, they reached the spot where he had envisioned the following conversation taking place, thankful he’d managed to keep her queries at bay for the entirety of their journey. Alex always did this, planned things down to the very last detail, predicted when and how things should happen. He’d always have grand ideas in his head, and it hurt him if ever those plans fell through. Evelyn glanced around herself nervously as Alex sat himself down, the tips of his shoes almost greeting the water as he tucked his knees up tight against his chest, hearing the soothing sounds of the water that trickled tenderly through their town, feeling so calm. He embraced those moments in silence, and he'd never felt more at home than he did then, in the middle of the night, in the place he had grown up, Evelyn stood cautiously at his side. She gradually set herself down, stroking over the thick material of the new trousers she had purchased, much to her father’s dismay. It was a little cold, but she was choosing to ignore the sensation, her legs crossed and her stomach in knots that continued to tighten. “I’ve been called up to work at the factory,” She eventually spoke again. “Making… weapons and… Well, making the necessities for the forces.” “Be careful. It can be dangerous work.” “I know. I will be.” He nodded, swallowing sadly as he finally allowed himself to come to terms why he’d dragged her from her bed in the middle of the night. He hoped being there could keep it calm, as that area often had. He’d found himself frequenting that very spot once he was old enough to come to terms with and accept his father’s death and the repercussions that had throughout his life. Those grounds felt therapeutic to him, as though the grass beneath his body could heal parts of him that felt broken. That area was a church to him, the water a God that guided him through turmoil. Evelyn gazed at him, and though he hadn’t said a word, she still felt as though she could burst into tears at any moment. After a while, she broke that silence, her voice shattered. “Alex, where have you been? You can’t just disappear on me.” “Why?” “Because I care about you!” She cried. His throat felt as though it was swelling, bulging with words he’d been so scared to say out loud, especially to her. There was a reason he’d disappeared. There was a reason he hadn’t seen her for weeks. He was scared. He couldn’t look at her when he finally released the dialogue that had lodged in his throat. “I’m leaving tomorrow.” He choked. “What?” “I go to war tomorrow.” The urge she’d had to cry was dragged away with the cold wind that swept past them, and suddenly, she held nothing but anger and frustration. Her chest was heaving, and what made it worse was the fact he still couldn’t bring himself to just look her in the eye. He couldn’t bare to face her, and that made her venomous mood all the more toxic. She shot back up to her feet, and his head dropped further downwards. “Tomorrow? And you’re telling me now?” She cried, waiting for a reaction, but not receiving one. “For god sake, Alex. You’re so… You’re so selfish. I can’t believe you’re only telling me now. I can’t believe you… I can’t believe you don’t care enough about my feelings to let me know sooner.” “Eve, sit down!” He demanded. “NO!” She whelped. “You are infuriating, and I can’t believe you didn’t think about me and how I would feel when-” “EVE, ALL I DID WAS THINK ABOUT YOU!” He yelled, finally whipping his head upwards and staring at her. “It’s all I did! If you think I didn’t tell because I don’t care, then you’re wrong! I didn’t tell you because… I couldn’t… because I care about you so much.” “How long have you known?” She scalded, folding her arms and trying to ignore his words. “It doesn’t matter.” “Yes it does, Alex. How long have you known?” “I get six weeks training and then I-” “Alex, just tell me!” “Its been a few weeks!” He finally admitted. “But I didn’t want to tell you and I don’t regret not telling you, so you might as well stop trying to make me feel guilty, because I don’t!” “Well you should!” “But I don’t!” “Why?” She fumed. “Because I couldn’t endure… weeks of you… looking at me like you’re going to lose me.” He bit, but those words weakened him, his whole body caving and his voice dropping. “I couldn’t stand the thought of you… looking at me like I was already gone.” Evelyn gazed down to him, finally seeing how scared he was. Of course he was eager to go off to war, to prove himself and to fight for his country, but he was still riddled with fear and consumed by daunting thoughts that had kept him away from her. She kicked the floor a little, watching him run a hand through his hair, and it was so rare to see Alex being so open, and vulnerable. She sat herself back down beside him, her heart racing, her head light. “So you stopped… coming to see me altogether.” She trembled. “I knew you’d… know I would have signed up. And I couldn’t lie to you. It was easier not to see you.” The two of them had shared some intense encounters in their time; moments where Alex had stared at her lips for so long she felt as though he owned them, but none compared to that moment. Their friendship and their connection had always felt like a confusing conundrum that they’d never been able to figure out, and never would figure out. But he was being so open with her, so honest and feeble. She finally had some understanding, and some confirmation that she meant more to him than so many others did. “I did know.” She whispered, nudging closer to him. “Of course I knew but… I didn’t think you would… be leaving tomorrow. I thought I would get some time with you.” “This is our time.” “But this isn’t enough, Alex. This isn’t enough!” “We’ll have all the time in the world when I get home.” “Al-” “I’m coming home.” He spoke sternly, temples pulsing, fists gripping tight. “I will come back to you, and when I do, I’ll make you my girl.” With those words, he finally turned his head to stare deep into her eyes, and she couldn’t dispute the confidence he held within his entire figure in that moment. She was convinced that she should have been riddled with doubt and confusion over what he’d just said to her, but the way he looked at her meant every argument and every uncertainty her mind created, just disappeared. “What?” She trembled. “I will come back to you, and… we can do this properly. It’s always been you, Eve. And when I get home… I want to make a life with you.” Maybe she’d been waiting for him to say those words without fully realising that she’d always wanted that from him. She wanted to create an existence where he was a constant rather than a fleeting companion whenever he had the time. There was so much more she needed to learn about the boy, but she was aware that she wanted to learn. Needed to learn. Their lips had never been acquainted, and yet a factor as simple as that seemed trivial when held against the true and honest feelings she had always held for him. Feelings that it seemed, he returned. Neither of them wanted to acknowledge that there was a possibility of him never returning. They just wanted to finally acknowledge how they felt about one another. “Do you really want that?” She gasped. “Since the very first day I met you.” “You were sixteen.” She told him, like he didn’t already know. “And nothing’s changed.” If only the low lighting could have shown him the rosy colour of her cheeks. Luckily, he still got to see her shy smile, and the way her head dropped, and that sight alone made his stomach bounce and his lips lift. He moved that little bit closer to her, their shoulders brushing, their worlds colliding, if only for the night. When she lifted her head back upwards, he was still staring fondly her way, biting sweetly at his bottom lip, relieved to have some confirmation of reciprocated feelings. He had predicted she felt that way towards him, obvious in her stance and her stares, but it had been an unspoken bond for so long. To have it out in the open was like breathing fresh air for the first time in years. “You feel the same way?” He questioned something he already knew. “I do.” She whispered timidly. “You should have told me.” “You should have told me.” She cooed, bashing her shoulder playfully against his. “You’re hard to read, Alex. But I know you can read me like a book.” He was smug thanks to her statement, because he didn’t necessarily think she was easy to read, but more like he was versed in her, so accustom to the minor and major occurrences of her body and soul that she was an open book to him when she was closed to so many others. He had to be the first one to take a step towards the two of them. She would have never worked up the courage. He moved closer, resting his forehead against hers, eyes glistening as he lay his hand upon her cheek, stroking his thumb over her smooth skin and breathing in the intense lack of proximity, closer to her than he had ever been before, both physically and mentally. “Will you wait for me?” He asked lowly. She closed her eyes, appreciatively leaning further into his touch, her body soothed, completely forgetting the anger she had felt only moments before. She opened her eyes to him again, catching the almost sombre look upon his face as he waited for her to acknowledge what he’d just asked, so she nodded. “Don’t fall in love with someone else.” He requested, his voice quiet. “Who said I’m in love with you?” She grinned. “Your eyes.” Her face flattered somewhat, her feelings suddenly sickeningly overwhelming, cursing her orbs for making her love so obvious. She swallowed, hard, almost cowering away before he gripped his fingers a little tighter. “Don’t worry,” He called. “I love you too.” She could only smile for a brief second before he finally pressed his lips delicately against hers, her whole body alighting and giddy at the feeling. She’d pictured this moment countless times, sure it would always remain a fantasy in her mind and she’d never experience the true feeling of his lips on hers and his tongue against her own. It was better than she envisioned, soft and caring but hard and desperate. The way his hand felt upon her cheek was a feeling she didn’t want to lose. Maybe it was better that way, only finding out the night before he was due to leave. Maybe it allowed things to be short and sweet and dreamlike. She sort of understood why he kept things that way, where they could just be in love and tender for this short period of time, where their emotions could surpass the fact he was leaving. It was brief, rather than painfully dragged out. She lay her hands on his neck, her fingertips grazing through his shaggy hair, attempting to tame her smile as he continued kissing her, his lips feeling like heaven. “I’ll come back to you.” He promised, whispering between kisses. “I’ll be yours… and you’ll be mine.” - Good night, then - sleep to gather strength for the morning. For the morning will come. Brightly will it shine on the brave and true, kindly on all who suffer for the cause, glorious upon the tombs of heroes. Thus will shine the dawn. - Alex couldn’t quite believe the number of men surrounding him. He hadn’t realised the small place he’d grown up even homed so many people. He'd been given his uniform a week prior, and that very morning he’d had his messy hair shaved at the back and sides, almost falling asleep as it happened. He'd stayed with Evelyn for as long as he could, parting ways when the sun began to rise, her fingertips slipping through his as she walked back into her home, trying to keep her smile bright and hopeful and trying even harder to ignore the tears in his eyes. They’d lapped up every last second they could and almost reached the stage where he felt as though he would be able to recall the exact shape of her lips and how they felt with his on his darkest days. They were as perfect as he knew they would be. He stroked his fingers through his newly short hair as the large gathering of men began to organise themselves, forming a line so they could head towards the awaiting train in an orderly manner, and he didn’t feel nervous, somehow. In a way, it felt like a calling to him, and he was absolutely prepared for what was about to happen. Alex easily ignored every factor that was telling him otherwise, his lack of experience and his age and the fact he really knew nothing of warfare. He felt surprisingly calm, and he could tell he wasn’t the only one. “ALEX!” He heard. He glanced down the line, watching Richard run up the side to join him. There was a Major stood watching the new troops gather, observing Richard as he scurried to join his friend. “Get in line!” The man yelled his order. “Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.” He replied nervously, darting in next to Alex and taking his place. “Fuck. Feel like I’m being bloody told off.” “Suppose we’ll have to get used to it.” Alex grumbled, scowling at the idea of it but knowing he’d have to come to terms with losing some of the power he’d grown accustom to over the years. They were soon ordered to start moving, the train station only five minutes from where they’d gathered, the line of men moving with pace and precision. A few people from their town were walking alongside the men, wives holding their husbands hands and children chasing them down the street like it was some sort of festival, something worth celebrating. This was something that made Richard feel sick to the stomach, the fact they were being sent off to fight and maybe die as part of a war that he didn’t even fully understand. But it helped Alex, and spurred him with every step, made him feel proud. It made him feel like he was doing the right thing and he had every reason to be filled with such pride. They were watched like hawks as they moved, Majors and Generals scattered down the line and keeping the men in-check. They had to be made aware as soon as possible that they were no longer in control of their own lives. “How ya feeling?” Richard asked him. “I’m good. I’m fine.” “Did you speak to Evelyn?” “Mm. Yeah.” “How’d it go?” “Ideal.” He managed to smirk. “M’gunna fucking marry that girl when I get home.” “Shoulda married her before. Shoulda married her years ago.” Alex stayed quiet, knowing that was probably true. He was in his early twenties, and a lot of the people he had known from school had married their loves in their late teens. He wasn’t quite sure what had held him back from admitting his feelings for her years earlier, but he did know the evening previous had been perfect; exactly what he wanted it to be. It was how he’d wanted the goodbye to be. It wasn’t often that Richard was quiet, so when Alex hadn’t heard a sound from him for a few minutes, he turned to look at him, and noticed that the boy was biting back tears, his fear of their destination strong and palpable. “Don’t be scared.” “Don’t be naive, Alex.” He groaned. “Not everyone… feels how you feel about this. Most of us are scared. All I can think about is… Is that maybe I won’t see this place again.” “You will.” “You don’t know that! You don’t know that.” Alex refused to let negativity crush him before they’d even got on the train. He wouldn’t let that happen. He knew going into war with that mindset was enough to reduce his chances of coming home, and he refused to let that happen to him. He knew what he had waiting for him at home and he would fight to the death to get back to her. As they neared the train station, they noticed an even bigger crowd had gathered, their town waving the new soldiers goodbye, kept at bay behind fences. Close by, Evelyn was running. She was breathless and desperate, darting through the crowds, and running to him. They had said they would leave their goodbye as the one they’d had in the early hours of that morning, because that way it was perfect and sweet, and they could have that as their last memory before he went off to fight. But as she stood in her home that morning, she realised that she had to go bid farewell to him and the rest of the troops. She couldn’t just stand there and pretend it wasn’t happening. So she was running, hoping he wasn’t at the front of the line with the men who were already slowly leaking onto the train that waited for them. She reached the core of the crowd, having to slow down but aggressively pushing through the bodies, apologising profusely as she moved, and that’s when she saw him, walking side by side with Richard, only a few feet away from the station doors. “Alex!” She yelled. “ALEX!” “Eve.” He gasped, coming to an abrupt standstill and darting his head towards the crowd, searching for her face. He was breathless, the sound of her voice sending him into a frenzy, and then he was right with her, knowing that he needed to see her one last time. To kiss her one last time. Richard darted to Alex as quickly as he could, the two of them causing disorder in the line, people scowling and groaning at them. “Alex, c’mon!” Richard scalded, teeth clenched. “Eve’s here.” He answered, looking desperately around the area. “She’s here. I heard her and I need- EVE!” He'd seen her beautiful face within the crowd, and the second he did, he began running over to her, Richard calling him back and trying to keep the order and make sure his friend didn’t make a bad name for himself too soon. But it was too late. He must have been around halfway towards her when a General came and stood in his path, blocking his body, thinking that would stop him immediately, but he didn’t know Alex. “Move!” He demanded. “Soldier, get back in line.” “Get the fuck out of my way!” The General moved closer, pressing his body threateningly against the Alex’s, who glared to him with his jaw clenched and nostrils flaring. They were a similar height, but the man in charge of the situation had many more years than Alex, and he’d probably dealt with boys like him before. He wasn’t threatened or fazed by him. Alex tried his best to hold eye contact with the man, noticing that his piercing blue eyes were unmoving, his jaw tightening when he smiled smugly. “You’re going to have to learn to take orders, boy.” He snarled, even more impressed with himself when he saw that Alex was backing down, intimidated by him. “Now do as your told, and get back in line.” Alex wasn’t used to being treated or spoken to in such a manner. He wasn’t used to being made to feel small, and he hated it. He hated everything about it. His eyes flicked over the mans shoulder, seeing Evelyn stood there watching the interaction, her body practically crushed against the fence ahead of her, tears gently streaming down her cheeks. He looked back forward, back to blue eyes, and he knew he wasn’t going to win. His chest was heaving, hatred in his eyes and his nose beginning to wrinkle thanks to the scorn he was feeling. “Get in line.” He was told one last time, and he didn’t need to be told again. He caught her eyes once more, his heart breaking at the sight and his anger being replaced by sorrow, before he turned on his heel, and began walking back to his fellow soldiers, Richard now far down the line, looking back to see as much of what had happened as he could, and hurting for his friend when he realised he hadn’t been able to say goodbye to his girl. Alex joined the line again, turning one final time to look at Evelyn, mouthing a sorry to her and hoping she had been able to make it out, and then putting his head back down. It was only in that moment, that leaving began to hurt. It was only in that moment, that Alex felt scared.